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hedwig221b · 2 months ago

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hiii hope you're doing well ! can we be gifted with a sneak peek of what you're working on right now ? love ya !

Hi, anon! The Midsommar au stubbornly doesn't want to be written, so here's a piece of an Outsider POV au (yes, again, yes, it's gonna be amazing) on a weird hermit witch Stiles (partially inspired by this post and also a very old bloody witchy plot bunny).

Her eyelashes stuck together as she blinked. Bit by bit, the haze lifted off her fever-stricken mind enough for her to take in the surroundings. She lay on an overly warm but surprisingly soft bed, soaking the covers under her with her sweat. The flames that danced upon the ceiling turned out to be just shadows from the roaring fireplace.

She stared at her clothes drying on the racks not far from it. Slowly, with her stomach sinking, she glanced at the man again.

He was no older than her, his pale skin splattered with moles and four ugly scars going down his cheek to his neck. Deep honey eyes and eyebrows hunched together.

He stood in front of the large dinner table, casting sharp shadows on the walls, and was busy grinding something in a mortar. The table was heavy with jars, vials, and sacks upon sacks of dried herbs. The reflection of the flames tinkled upon the glass. Everything inside seemed dark of a color.

Allison swallowed thickly.

“Who are you?” she whispered.

The man didn’t answer. He flipped pages of a book without any care and muttered something under his breath before hurrying to the right corner of the room. There, multiple feathers hung in a tight bundle; behind it, swung a single thick thread with a row of claws strapped to it by the fishing hooks.

Allison shifted her gaze, dread filling her stomach along with nausea.

Claws, feathers, eyeballs stuck together in a jar like pickled tomatoes. A deer skull in the corner with mittens hanging from its horns to dry. Jars upon jars of sealed violet flowers and a couple of cauldrons stacked together near the fireplace.

This cozy house lit with warmth and the cloying scent of drying herbs, belonged to a witch.

It would’ve been better if she died.

Allison didn’t have time to scream as the man leaned over her again.

Now that he had shed his winter coat, he looked slender but strong. He had to be fit to keep a house like this going, of course, but he also had to eat well. Was she his next meal? Was that fire for her?

A cry left her lips when the stranger grabbed her hand wrist up. She yanked it back with every bit of strength she had in her, only to yelp as his fingers gripped her wrist.

The man harrumphed as if her struggle for life was so annoying, and, to Allison’s horror, pulled out a dagger.

The diamonds glinted in the low light for a second before the blade pressed to her cheek, stilling her to death.

“We can do it two ways,” the man said quietly. “You can either stop wiggling and lose a bit of blood, or you can fight and lose it all. The choice is in your hands.”

A pearl of tear rolled off her eyes and onto the glinting blade.

The man smiled. His scars scrunched together.

God, how atrocious he was.

“Some brain left in you, heh?” he chuckled and swiped across her cheek.

Sharp pain burst through it, but then, all pressure was off her.

“See?” the man took the mortar off the floor and shook the droplet of her blood off the dagger’s tip into the mixture. “Nothing bad happened. Again, if you hadn’t fought, the cut would’ve been on your arm and not right there on your face, but…” he shrugged.

“Why?” Allison asked.

Why did you save me? Why are you doing this?

The man pretended to not hear her. He stuck his finger in the mixture, scooped up the gloopy bit, and put it in his mouth. With his eyes shut tightly, he hummed at the taste.

If only Allison wasn’t so weak, she would’ve disarmed him right there. Naked and with nothing but her hands for weapons, she would’ve won the fight, she was sure of it. Her father taught her to kill, and she learned it well.

The man’s eyes opened slowly. He swallowed and looked down at Allison, his gaze cold and calculating.

“Want soup?” he asked and jumped from the bed.

What?..

“I’ve just finished making it when I sensed you wandering around.” The man puttered around the table, closing the vials and screwing the jars shut. “I’m not giving you any meat, but the stock is delicious. Delicious!” He grinned to himself, though his smile wilted as he noticed her wide terrified eyes. “You get to live, okay? Don’t look at me like that. God!” He rolled his eyes and took out a bowl, which he promptly filled with a ladle-worth of steaming broth. “You are not a heroine in a romance novel, stop suffering.”

“I was ready to meet my death in the forest,” Allison insisted hoarsely, lifting herself on trembling elbows only to quickly fall back onto the pillows. Even that tiny bit of anger took everything from her.

“I’m not your chaperone!” the man bit out as he sat on the bed. He glanced at her weak body and, with a huff, put the bowl on the floor. Then, he took her under the armpits and pushed her into a sitting position.

Even with her head spinning, Allison tried to cover her suddenly naked breasts. A moment later, hands pushed covers up her shoulders and tucked them behind her back.

“Don’t try that with me,” the man grumbled, unfazed, and picked up the bowl from the floor. He swirled the spoon in the rich broth. “I have a mate.”

What a weird man. A mate? Like the one animals had?

She glanced at the lone pair of boots near the heavy door. One fur coat drying on the stand. One hat.

The man didn’t have anyone, did he?

Either he drove himself mad from loneliness, or his “mate” wasn’t… human.

Her gaze fell on his scars all by itself. It was the first thing one would notice about him, and then would stare at it forever, unable to tear their eyes away. They barely missed his eye, but that was a small consolation, considering how deep and white they were, how the skin pulled together and froze in place for the rest of his life.

Perhaps, Allison would’ve considered him handsome if it weren’t for the scars. His eyes were striking even with their coldness, and his nose was pushed slightly up. Despite living alone in the woods, he kept himself clean and shaven, although a beard would’ve hidden some of the scars.

“Say ‘aah’,” the man opened his mouth in example and pressed a spoonful of oily broth to her lips.

It was surprisingly nice, though very gamey. She didn’t dare purse her nose, though, as the liquid coated her tongue and soother her parched throat. By the end of the meal, her stomach was full, though unpleasantly warm, and her lips shined with the thin layer of fat.

“Who are you?” Allison tried again, her blinks slow.

“Stiles.”

She frowned. “What?”

“What?” the man mocked her in a high-pitched voice. “That’s my name, you idiot. I’m gonna call you Idiot.”

“I’m Allison.”

“And I don’t care.” With an inexistent grace of a newborn fawn, the man rose from the edge of the bed, glanced at it wistfully, and went to the kitchen area to stack up her bowl on top of the others. “Why are there always dishes?”

With her eyes closing more and more, Allison watched as the man loaded the dirty dishes into the basin, lifted it up, and walked to the door.

At the last moment, as if he just remembered Allison was there, Stiles stopped and glanced at her.

“Oh, yeah, stay here,” he said. “If you try to run, I am going to break your legs. If I break your legs, my mate is going to think I am giving him a prey to chase.” He cringed his nose in thought. “Nice idea, by the way. Nice, nice, nice…” he shoved his feet in the boots and shuffled outside, cursing at the cold.

Yes, thought Allison as the sleep forced her eyes closed, death would’ve been a mercy.

[divider source]

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tobbotobbs · 2 years ago

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what about cod men with reader who BLASTS music like ayesha erotica, nikki minaj and etc randomly while chilling or has headphones and does that while on field

Ohhhh I think they would probably be all so confused or worried if it happened in the middle of a mission lol, here my thoughts to that scenario:

When Ghost heard you playing Nasty from Ayesha for the first time on the middle of interrogating someone they captured and kept alive on their mission, he was very irritated. Soap tried to get the new, right information out of the soldier meanwhile you two and Gaz stood in the darker corner, staring at the horrified man as you quietly sang the lines of the song playing over your headset.

,,Damn I'm sorry I blew you off, I was doing lunch with Microsoft. I'm sucking off a C.E.O, if he's not a millionaire then I've got to go~"

,,What the hell?! Y/n quit that singing! What even is that?", Ghost looked disgusted at you, questioning why he was even befriended with you in first place but quick to remember that you're actually his favorite person on earth, except for when you were listening to sich filth. In the middle of a mission. He quickly became used to it though, just told you once in a while to keep it down or put the music off if the operation was in need of your attention. He didn't enjoy the music as it was, the text too vulgar and flithy for his liking, but he couldn't deny that the melodies of some of your songs were quite catchy sometimes. Of course he grew even more annoyed when you and Gaz would play songs together on base and Soap would jump in on it with his ugly singing.

He didn't knew you were listening to that kind of music. He sometimes heard you playing some songs as loud as you could in your room, but he never understood a thing of what was sang and your door was always locked, as if to keep people out from seeing you dance some kind of risky dance to this music. Oh boy, if he knew.

Emo Boy was suddenly playing. It scared the shit out if Soap, Kyle and yourself even though it was your ringtone.

,,Oh shit! Sorry guys, Mama's calling. Don't wait for me with the movie!", you were smiling at them and quickly picking up and talking to your mum over the phone.

,,Was that-", ,,Emo Boy by Ayesha Erotica?", ,,Oh. My. God. I heard that right?!!?", ,,Yeah...I didn't know Y/n would listen to that type of music Soap!", ,,Me neither Gaz...it's a catchy song though", ,,Oh it really is. Probably why he chose it?", ,,Yeah...you think he's also into other songs of that genre?", ,,Maybe. Are you?", ,,Oh hell nuh. Not me, no no".

Gaz raises a brow at that and smirks. Then they both start laughing. ,,Oh you are so listening to this kind of music man!", ,,Pah, and if I am? You knew the song by name and artist by just a few seconds of melody playing!", ,,Ah yeah you got me there mate heh"

,,Alright guys, I'm back! Let's start this movie night shall we?", you grinned and sat next to Kyle again, who just smiled at you and nodded, reaching for the remote control. ,,Tell me, is that the music you alway listen and dance to in your room?", ,,Uhm yeah, whx Kyle?", ,,...Wanna show me one of those dances someday?", he grinned suggestively and you just giggled at that.

Oh this man showed you this tyoe of music, actually. He was playing some song from Doja Cat on the radio of the car from his so nicely called "Hype or Horn Me Up" playlist. You were confused at first. The words used in the songs were...interesting. And Soap was dancing and tapping to it like he was in some dance off. It was amusing and fun. Of course his taste in music wore off on you and so it surprised noone on the team when you were running past them on the field, gun in hand while looking as if you had the time of your life, the could hear for a short time the music blasting through your headphones as you went to go for the next kills.

,,I ain't tryna be cool like you hmmhmhmhmm", you sang while aiming to shoot an enemy, the new song coming on another Doja Cat favourite of you and soap. Hitting the target clean in the head you smirked. ,,I'm bitch. I'm a boss. I'm bitch, I'm a boss, I'm a shine like gloss!", ,,Oi yes you are Darlin!", Soap beamed from behind you. Price was just sighing and pinching his nosebridge while Ghost was just standing next to him like an annoyed older sibling.

You guys would play this type of music all around the base, 24/7. All week long. Until Price got so mad he made you do the dishes and gave you one month of cleaning duty. You did in fact not keep it down afterwards and everyone just had to live with it. Some of the younger recruits actually enjoyed it and envied you guys for that, made them feel less stressed and more relaxed.

Oh boy. Oh. Boy. He nearly died. First time you blasted that music on the car ride to some pub out of town because you guys all got some time off duty? He was thinking about how he could never go to heaven now, or even just into a church. He would perish just standing on the steps of a church. But then he remembered, he wasn't even religious. So that was fine. But then he thought "Why the fuck is this muppet listening to THAT?!!?!?". You currently sat in the driver's seat and danced to S.L.U.T by Bea Miller. Before that a song way worse was playing, Price recalled (it was I Want Your Bite by Cara Cunningham). This one now wasn't too bad. It was quite nice actually. Way more innocent than ghe other one. John was thankful for that, he grew very hot and was all flustered by the other song which made him feel a little uncomfortable.

,,Oh we're nearly there Cap!", ,,Y-Yes. Just...just put the car to a stop yeah?", ,,Whatever you say Captain!", you smiled while the next song came on. ,,Oh my god this one is so good!". Price looked over to you, awaiting something more innocent again like before. He thought wrong.

,,Ride it, slide it, bite, get inside it

Come on, touch my body

I know that you like it, you can't hide it

Come on touch my body

Hotter, bigger, faster, longer, thicker

Come on touch my body!", you sang loud and proud to the lines of Treat Me Like A Slut by Kim Petras. John officially was a tomato now. He loved seeing you having your fun, but this was surely and never will be his kind of music choice.

,,Treat Me Like A Slut, little dirty bitch I love to fuck!", ,,Okayyy I think it's- oh look there's the pub! Get us a good parking lot and then we'll have some fun kid, a'right?", ,,Yes!".

Poor guy always gets all red when he hears some of his boys play such music. And with Soap and you, and occasionally also Kyle, on his team that was a lot of times. But he wouldn't be too mad about it. Just sometimes id you played it too loud or while he was in an important meeting. He did enjoy seeing you all have your fun so he is not too strict with punishments.

You are playing some pretty filthy, nasty song in your shared house. Ale just came back from grocery shopping, Rudy in tow helping him with the bags. You were wearing just a shirt and boxers while singing to the song, looking through some magazines on the couch and just waiting for Alejandro to be back. He new of your guilty pleasure for those songs, this kind of music. He adored the way you would get all red sometimes when he talked about it to you, but he doesn't judge. He actually listens to songs like this as well. Obviously in spanish. He showed you some in his native language and you enjoyed them, even if you didn't know what was said.

Alejandro would laugh sometimes when you randomly put the music on while you were in a fight. It always made his mood go all the way up hearing and seeing you enjoy this music, especially if you would listen to the spanish ones he had shown you. For him it is no problem. He trusts you with being focused on missions so he allows you to listen to music, sometimes you even listen together over the radio.

The same goes for Rodolfo, but the poor guy would be worried sick if you would start blasting loud music on missions out of nowhere. Give the little guy a warning beforehand so he doesn't shoot you out of shock hehe. He also shows you songs in spanish, some that are not as filthy as yours but have the same kind of energy and he translates them for you.

Little german/austrian boy listens to filthy music himself. He is the biggest Rammstein fan there is. One of his favourite songs is probably Bück Dich (Bend Over) and Dicke Titten (Big Boobs/Big Tits). He also really enjoys Labyrinth by OOMPH! It's not really filthy with words but the meaning is pretty dirty. It's also a banger like, he was so happy you enjoyed listening to music with him. To that kind of music as well. He really wantes to visit a Rammstein concert with you someday, if you said yes.

He doesn't listen to music on the job though. And because he's your colonel he asked you kindly to not do it either. On the flight to wherever the mission was? Yes of course he will even listen with you to calm his nerves. At the base? Sometimes he even gets Horangi to join you guys, who really hates this kind of music because he heard too much of it in hia home country (he absolutely hates kpop and all the horny people coming with it).

When you showed him some of your favourite artists and they would sing too fast or use words he didn't understand, you would try to translate for him and the most funny german ever. He told you it was fine to try to explain in english but you really wanted to make him happy and maybe even laugh a little when you tried to explain that the person in the song just sang "Ich möchte in deinen Titten ertrinken" (I wanna drown on those tits/boobs of yours). He is so sweet if someone came up and would make fun of you listening to such music, like he would finally use his rank for once and make them regret for ever saying that to you.

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winkliee · 1 year ago

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Hiii im kinda new to this so im sorry if i mess up!

If u play genshin can u do the hantengu clones with a ganyu reader but if u doesn't can u do the hantengu clones taking a bath with nervous reader (nsfw) I'm sorry if this is too much😣😣😣😓😓😓

you are my first ask!! i am so sorry i do not play genshin though, but hopefully what i am presenting will be good. also i have never written a full smut scene so this was really difficult to write, idk if it's good 😭

Hot Springs

hantengu clones × nervous reader

warnings: smut, sub f!reader, praise kink, consensual non-con, size kink, somnophillia, overstimulation, loss of virginity, nipple pinching, cunninglus, aizetsu is whiny

you ran through the forests, clutching your sword. you were sure you sensed a demon just now. but where was he?

you looked around for the umpteenth time. nope, no one in sight.

the kakushi accompanying you caught up to you huffing. "y/n sama," he said panting, "you aren't fully healed yet. please take some rest."

"there is a demon here!!" you shouted at the poor kakushi, "how can i leave my duty and-"

"but there's no one in sight," the kakushi retorted. "please take some rest for the time being. i will personally inform you if i see anything suspicious."

you started to calm down a bit. "fine," you finally agreed.

the kakushi smiled at you with his masked face. "there's a really nice hot spring not very far from here. i have heard it has healing abilities. you should definitely try it."

you laughed a bit. you knew that some kakushis can be really weird, especially the one who had made the love hashira's uniform.

"you will be ogling at me, huh?"

the kakushi blushed furiously. "n-no ma'am," she said quickly calming down, "if you allow, i have been offered a job of helping some injured slayers down the hill. but i cannot leave you alo-"

"you may go," you said dismissing the kakushi.

"but-"

"i can survive myself, there are other people in need of you, you should leave."

the kakushi looked at you, before bowing deeply and leaving instantly.

you started to walk deeper into the forest in search of the spring. "i am sure it isn't far."

it wasn't. a mere fifteen minutes walk later, you found the hot spring, bubbling.

"well, i guess it's not too bad to relax," you thought as you started undressing.

the mist of the springs made you feel so relaxed, sleepy infact, as you were sure you would drowse off there.

but you were too lazy to even get out.

that is when you heard some voices from the other side. male voices.

you couldn't see them properly because of the mist, but you could figure out there was atleast four of them.

you grew nervous. after all, your swords and clothes were kept far from here in a safe area.

"maybe this is a mixed bath," you thought, even though you felt hot at the idea of being naked while there were other men in the spring.

"relax," you said to yourself. but as you heard the voices getting nearer, you couldn't help but try to slip away.

too late.

"look who do we have here~" you heard a voice through your daze, as anxiety filled you.

you looked up to a pair of green eyes, and...horns.

"demons?!" you screamed before a hand muffled your voice, as you looked up to see a yellow eyed demon too.

"how dare you use our private spring?!" the red eyes demon shouted at you.

you tried to retort back by saying that his name wasn't written there, but your mouth was still muffled by the other demon.

you read their kanji. uppermoon four...

you tried to free yourself from the hands of the yellow eyed demon, gripping him so hard that you were sure you heard his surprised yowl, but the blue eyed demon stopped you. "i am sad you are trying to hurt us," he said, with his worried face.

"heh sekido," the green eyed demon started, "looks like she's a demon slayer. she has extraordinary strength."

"i can see that you foo-"

"guys please stop fighting-"

"shut up!" the three other demons shouted in unison, as the blue eyed demon immediately became quiet.

in the meanwhile you had succeeded in freeing yourself from the yellow eyed demon's grip, and attempted to flee, but the red eyed demon, apparently sekido, grabbed you back and pulled you into the waters again.

"shit," you thought to yourself, "they are going to kill me. i can't even fight back because the mist of the spring has numbed my senses."

"how dare you come here and relax?!" sekido's voice growled.

"awww, poor girl, she didn't know," the green and yellow eyed demons laughed together.

please stay quiet karaku, urogi,"the blue eyed demon said. "let sekido handle this."

the demons ignored him, as karaku kept his arm on sekido's hand and said, "let's not kill her. today's mission was extremely difficult. let's have some fun?"

urogi on cue, asked the other demon, "what do you think, aizetsu?"

while they were conversing, you finally had a clear look at the four demons towering over you. their bodies were rather muscular, and they were naked, there semi-hard dicks dangling right before your eyes.

"looks like she's in too," you heard karaku laugh. "look at how she's staring at our cocks. she could almost drool."

your face reddened at their suggestion, as you tried to free yourself from their grips.

"well, well," said sekido, "you're not leaving without receiving your punishment."

you have no idea how much time has passed. your only recollection is that they dragged you through the mist, into the middle of the hot spring.

you couldn't even try to escape, the mist having numbed your senses completely. they groped your breasts, as urogi started sucking your nipples while groping your other breast. karaku on the other hand nipped your neck, covering them with multiple bruises and hickies. aizetsu took a place between your knees, massaging them, trying to calm down your increased pants, while kissing your thighs.

you grew more and more nervous as you watched sekido stand nearby watching you, his face was definitely angry, but, but he was smirking?

all those thoughts were erased from your mind when a finger prodded on your cunt. you looked down to see aizetsu staring up at you, with a questioning glance, wanting approval.

you understood you were already in this deep when you nodded.

quite immediately aizetsu started licking you up, his finger roughly entering your hole, which wasn't much moisturized.

"i-it hurts," your voice left in a whisper as you tried to concentrate on the pleasure karaku was giving your breasts.

aizetsu went on sucking your clit, as you gasped. demon slaying had never given you time to take care of yourself so you were naturally sensitive.

how would you ever have known that four demons would be doing this with you?

you stifled your moans as much as you could, but you let out a whine as you neared your climax.

"n-no more-"

you came on aizetsu's face, embarrassed that you couldn't stop yourself, but he didn't seem to mind as he went on sucking you.

you were in a state of daze, as you were overstimulated beyond you could take, when you felt someone push aizetsu away.

"move," karaku said, "it's my time to enjoy her," he said roughly entering you.

you screamed out a bit at the sudden intrusion, it was really painful after all.

"look sekido, i took her virginity," he laughed. you looked over at sekido with your half open eyes, and he looked very angry.

but you had no time to relax. karaku pounded into you constantly, as a string of moans erupted from you. you were surprised yourself by the noises you were making.

"isn't it huge?" karaku said leaning over to suck your boobs, while one hand snaked down to rub your clit. "my dick is ruining you, aww," he laughed at you pitifully.

you couldn't mutter out a word. you gripped on his biceps as the stimulation became too much for you to handle, and you came again.

"s-stop, aah"

you were almost passing out, but a gentle slap on your cheek woke you up, as you saw sekido taking karaku's place.

"no falling asleep now, little slayer," urogi said caressing your face, "sekido doesn't like that."

sekido wrapped his arms around your body, in a possessive manner. "don't you dare pass out," he growled. "this is a punishment," he said.

you were already scared, but sekido's length had your reeling. it was really hard to enter you, but once he had, your head was thrown back as you whined, scratching on his chest.

"what a naughty girl you are, enjoying your punishment," he mocked, "did you just come from me entering you? pathetic."

he started moving gently, but his speed altered and soon he was pounding into you like karaku, hell even faster than him.

you were on the brink of consciousness, and your body was tired when you came again and again.

"i want to try her next!" you heard urogi's delightful scream.

you moaned out loud when sekido hit a certain spot in you, and kept on doing that, as you came again.

"his growls, his growls sound so hot," you thought, as you closed your eyes when you came again from his ruthless pounding.

you slowly opened your eyes to see, aizetsu shallowly thrusting into you.

did you fall asleep? how are they still continuing?

aizetsu seeing you awake, smiled brightly.

"i was so scared you were hurt," he said, before whimpering, "y-you are so tight."

you looked around for the others. aizetsu, as if reading your thoughts, told, "they have left already. i am sorry they misbehaved. i will take care of you," he said, before whimpering as he came inside you.

"s-so warm," you threw your head back, your mind still reeling. aizetsu nipped at your neck, kissing so gently as you almost melted from his touch, unconsciously pulling him close and grinding on him.

god, this was a punishment to remember.

thank you for reading. likes and reblogs are appreciated.

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a-dauntless-daffodil · 7 months ago

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I AM TAKING CHARLIE BEING A SNEAKY LITTLE FUCKER AND SHARING HER IMMORTALITY WITH VAGGIE AND *RUNNING*

Charlie is absolutely sleeping on the couch for a while, and maybe also getting a firm talk about *asking first*.

...and maybe a little MORE sleeping on the couch. BUT she's never sleeping on the couch for long before her wife, quietly grumbling about wanting her cuddles dammit, comes over and drags her to bed.

And maybe they do talk quietly about charlie's fears there, while they're laying in bed. And maybe charlie's horns come out then, and her tail coils tight around vaggie's waist, and tears start running down her cheeks.

She had been so *scared*...

And Vaggie cant help but just sigh and sit up, brushing those tears away from her *overly-dramatic princesa*.

It's okay that she was scared. Vaggie understood, even if she was still a *little* annoyed. But they had time to figure it out. Her clever, *stubborn* princesa had bargained for all the time they'd ever need.

Vaggie: "I guess it figures, honestly."

Charlie: "Wh-" (voice fucked up from crying) (clears throat) "-what does?"

Vaggie: "You. Of all the demons in hell, of course you'd be the one who tricks someone into stealing YOUR soul."

Charlie: (wet giggle) "Heh. Shared, not stolen, Vaggie."

Vaggie: "Not yours anymore either way, sweetie."

Charlie: "Freely given."

Vaggie: "Not so freely taken but I guess I'll just have to live with that."

Charlie: "You will- you're gonna have a VERY long time to be angry with me about it!"

Vaggie: "I'm not angry, Charlie. I'm just..."

Charlie: "...disappointed? Trust, kinda dented? A little?"

Vaggie: "It's more like-"

Charlie: "I fucked around with our vows in front of everyone without telling you and made you do something you didn't want and I really, REALLY wish I could say I'm sorry for that- I- I wasn't even sure I'd go through with it until- I just-"

Vaggie: "Shhh I know. It's.... okay."

Charlie: "It's not."

Vaggie: "It's okay enough for me. I know you were scared. I don't ever want you to be that scared again."

Charlie: "I'm not anymore!"

Vaggie: "Right." (muttering) "Now I get to be the scared one..."

Charlie: "What? Scared of what? We can, we be together always now- neither of us has to leave! And, and even if we DO split up... we'll still see each other around for the rest of eternity. That's not. Bad. Is it..?"

Vaggie: "It's a long time to live with all the people I've killed. And with who I've been."

Charlie: "....."

Vaggie: "I'm already... not always the best at living with that. Or leaving it behind. Now I've got your soul in my hands, sweetie. I changed for the better, once- what if next time it's for the worse?"

Charlie: "Then I'll be there until you change again."

Vaggie: "What if I hurt you?"

Charlie: "You were going to already. Now at least, we'll always have the chance to make up afterwards."

Vaggie: (chuckling) "Like we're doing right now, huh."

Charlie: "Well~ It is ONE way of spending our honeymoon~"

Vaggie: "You're still staying on the couch, babe."

Charlie: "-Yep, yep, that's totally fair!"

Vaggie: "So I guess I'll just have to stay here with you."

Charlie: "... I'd like that."

Vaggie: "You'd better. No take backs, remember? Your silly soul is mine, officially, until someone manages to off us both in creation's most epic combo kill."

Charlie: "Heheheh. That's fine." (snuggles under vaggies wing) "I always like going out with you..."

Vaggie: "....I'm adding another week of couch time for that joke."

Charlie: (singing) "And I still regret nothiiiiing~!"

Vaggie: "Typical." (smiling anyway)

#hazbin hotel #charlie morningstar #vaggie #chaggie #incorrect quotes #is it gay to sell your soul to the woman you love for less than the cost of a single corn chip?#or is it just #Corny #XD

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honey-minded-hivemind · 2 months ago

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Little ideas for Dandy and Doe(Goat Papa and Mama)

Dandy: wow... your eyes are like sapphires, gee! Heh, that's pretty corny though huh?

Doe: oh no, not at all... Anyone would like it

their theme as Die with a smile

Dandy: everyone's(morph) always asking, Dandy how'd you bag that baddie? How'd you bag that baddie? I didn't bag shit! Doe picked me up and threw me over her shoulders (metaphorically or literally, either way is funny), and I've been here ever since, And I have no plans of getting down!

Dandy:

Doe:

Ahaha! (Dandy is head over hooves for Doe, Doe is head over heels for him, and now Dandy has a wife, Doe has a husband, and they both have three partners who are powerful mutants and are the other loves of their lives!)

Dandy is very sweet, a bit country, very charming, and is very gentle and likes to spoil others (he also let's himself be spoiled). He gets really rough and tough in battle or during missions, and is super strong, has sharp horns, has a very thick skull, and can pick up and haul Logan.

Doe is beautiful and cunning. Don't mess with her sunshine ball of light husband, their amazing weather goddess partner, their charming mimic partner, or their fluffy growly partner. She can and will end someone. She's doting, can pack a punch, wears all kinds of dresses and sweaters, and is very happy when she finds out she' and her partners are going to finally have a baby.

(Yes, those five tried for a kid for, like, several years. They finally get one, and then once Dandy and Doe are gone, so too is the baby, it seems...) (except surprise, it's Reader, who followed/was kidnapped by Sabretooth, and ended up stuck with him)

Dandy, when he finds out he's about to be a dad, starts crying. He sobs, he wails, and he starts trying to think of baby names. Doe is more collected, but ends up also crying and sobbing, and they both hold each other and start trying to think of a color for the nursery. Logan, Morph, and Storm also end up crying. Logan is quicker to shrug it off, bit is so very pleased, Morph is bawling and already attached, and Storm is starting to drag all of them out to start shopping for baby stuff.

(What are Reader's few possessions or possesion they kept from when they were still with their mom, Mama Goat/Doe? Do they have anything from their dad, Papa Goat/Dandy?)

#honeycomb thoughts #platonic yandere marvel #yandere platonic marvel #platonic yandere xmen #yandere x-men #platonic yandere marvel x reader #platonic yandere xmen evolution #platonic yandere xmen evolution au #platonic yandere #platonic yandere x reader #🔔knell of the bell🐏 au #Mama Goat: Doe #Papa Goat: Dandy

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islandlobster · 8 months ago

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For requests. Option 1. I am SO curious to know how heroshade/golden wolf would look in your style (you are so surprised I’m asking for this)

Option 2: WINDWAKER GANONDORF????????

love heros-shade-fanclub

hi lovely . i thought too hard about him and got sick here are my design notes v

recently found out the chestplate design is meant to be a wolf . i thought it was a weird owl or a little mouse (???) so i made it kinda clearer & also golden wolf theeeeme ^.^

i think this was very much show armour over actual practical battle armour . like he used it for tournaments or meetings or being paraded around in general

changed his helmet bc i think its silly (i love it) but i based it off of king dodongos horns ^.^ i think he goes back and defeats it (afaik it was the only young link boss that wasnt sent out by ganon? i am not fact checking this) which earns him a position as a knight of hyrule & he works his way up the chain from there

power gauntlets from oot . heh 😏

made his missing eye cracked bc maybe he died from a blow there . in the lost woods of course so he gets stalfosed but still

IDKKKKK IDKKKKKKK HE MAKES ME SICK. AUUUGH

#my art #hero's shade #twilight princess #oot link #i used strands of grass by accident instead of a rounder plant brush and i got too far in to go back on it . DONT LOOK !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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theflagscene · 6 days ago

Text

Random QL Superlatives - 2024 Edition

Listen, if there’s a trend that involves lists, imma jump on that! So here I am, giving random niche awards to my faves ☺️

Best use of a deity’s name - God / Monster Next Door

His nickname being Godzilla made sense in the webcomic, they carried the whole fire breathing monster motif over into very cutesy cartoons but I was not expecting them to shorten his nickname even further. Giving a nickname a… nickname?? 🤔 But you know what, it freaking worked! God was a gift sent down from the heavens. He was the perfect giant puppy and the greenest green flag, really perfectly named imo.

Best jerk off scene - Fadel / The Heart Killers

Not only was this jerk off scene the most realistic one I’ve ever seen on network television—boy was done in sixty seconds!—but it was also the most realistic male orgasm I’ve ever seen. The scrunched up face, the weird grunting and huffing noises, kicking his leg, Joong came (heh) to prove a point and he did!

Best allegory for life and death - Love For Love’s Sake

From the constant water noises, to the video game visuals, the loss and gaining of points, the borrowed time, the crumbling world, the memory loss, the messages from the people left behind. When Myungha is caught between the life he lost and the second chance he was being given as he stands surrounded by darkness and water, dripping wet from his death but wearing the high school uniform from his second chance… just ugh! Perfect, absolutely beautiful.

Best fucked up family dynamic - Unknown

I love a messy family, but I love a messy found family even more. This was the perfect blend of both, with Wei Qian and Li Li being biologically related, Zhi Yuan the one they took in from the streets and Tan Yu the lifelong friend and only reason Wei Qian was able to keep a roof over their heads for so many years, it was bound to become insane. And insane it was, but in such a fantastic way. Messy forbidden love all around, arguments and fights and so much drama. But they all came out of it the other side better people, and a stronger family.

Best horniest bastards - MutRak / Love Sea

FortPeat will always deliver when it comes to high heat, and while I might have issues with the screenwriter’s… idiosyncrasies, shall we call them? Love Sea was one of her lesser offensive offerings, focusing mostly on the lust driven horn balls that were Mahasumut and Rak. Were there other plot points? Yes. Didn’t any of them matter? Not really. We all knew Mut would get his man in the end, boy put Rak under a dick spell from the first moment they met. I think this was the first QL with a canonical facefucking scene, kudos boys.

Best speedrun of feels - KanThiu / Spare Me Your Mercy

Where did the emotions come from? When did they start? Did Kan have a crush on Thiu from the stories that Thiu’s mother had told him? Neither are in the closet or into one night stands… yet they’re not dating. They have a full blown emotional relationship, before even sharing a kiss. KanThiu might secretly actually be useless lesbians and we’re all just being tricked!

Best health code violations - OabPlawan / This Love Doesn’t Have Long Beans

No amount of Purell will ever make any of those kitchens food safe, two public kitchens and one private one, those pots and pans saw some shit!

Best sudden pairing replacement - MarcPoon

When the little DV dickhead was yanked from the We Are lineup, even though half of the filming was done, I was very concerned about the series getting shelved. But instead we got MarcPoon and omg, they are quickly becoming everything to me! Why are they so perfect? The chemistry, the cuteness, I just adore them.

Most unexpected second season announcement - Pit Babe Season 2

The scream I scrumpt, okay, that’s a lie, I didn’t scream. I laughed out loud and shouted: omg they fucking did it! Which prompted the infamous ‘butt babies’ conversation with my mother, so yeah, completely unexpected but very much excited for.

Best return to the QL world - Saint Suppapong

I have never been so happy to be wrong in my life! The morning I posted my answer for one of the ‘15 Day BL Challenge’ questions where I mentioned that I wished Saint would return to BLs but I highly doubted he ever would, that same morning Idol Factory dropped the teaser the rocked the fandom. Saint is returning to QLs! My flabbers were gasted.

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exnoiafork · 2 months ago

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remember how you mentioned 'iida'atan x reader. heh. how about. how about we request 'iida'atan x reader & they reveal the fact they're actually just illumina & therefore she has to reveal her master evil plan & doomed yuri. heh 😼

-isotope & sobaa 🌀

dommbed yuri.. never done that before..

'iida'atan x reader

“I LOVE YOU ALL THE SAME!” (Doomed yuri I try..)

INTRODUCTION:

'iida'atan is Kai’s version of the overseer. as said in the ask, they’re basically illumina. Illuminas alter ego …I’m also using the overseer axe as 'iida'atan’s gear for this x reader

READER’S BACKGROUND:

- you were diagnosed with an illness that only ‘iida'atan and ghostwalker can cure. seems like they know because they “accidentally” bumped into you once and ever since then u guys started talking

TW: murder lol

[You fell in love with.. who? Ah! You once fell in love with.. well, they call themselves “Ida”. You have no idea what that name means, nor its origins but.. as long as they treat you nice I guess.]

“Hey.. Ida!”

[You ran up to “Ida”, hugging them. They were.. really tall.. so obviously they’re very huggable.. they wrapped their big arms around your waist, it was really warm.. and cozy… awweew.. There’s horns covering their eyes , and yet somehow, they can still “see” you clearly. Really clearly, they know EXACTLY what you’re doing. They’re kinda weird but you still love them anyway.]

“..You are a rather odd one at heart, dear.”

“All people are weird , alright? Cut me a bit of slackk…”

[you say that teasingly]

“It is completely fine, dear. I shall admit, I am.. “weird” as well.”

[Now that you think about it.. Ida always talks in such fancy ways! Like.. “𝓘𝓽 𝓲𝓼 𝓬𝓸𝓶𝓹𝓵𝓮𝓽𝓮𝓵𝔂 𝓯𝓲𝓷𝓮, 𝓭𝓮𝓪𝓻..” that’s extremely fancy. What in the novel are they speaking? At least they admit they’re weird too…]

“It’s like you’re talking like a villain! I dunno, I’ve seen them speak like that in movies…”

[Ida sighs. They sigh heavily. So heavily it actually catches your brainrotted attention span. Dear Illumina above, what do they have in mind?? Gossip?! Tea to spill?! You don’t know but you wait eagerly.]

“Let us go to somewhere more.. private.” (I know what you’re thinking about rn)

….

[You two head.. somewhere? Yeah, that somewhere is an alleyway. Not the best place to be in, but hey, it’s a decent place for a meetup! And as long as your.. “pookie” stays happy then you’re fine with this one.]

“I.. I have something to tell you.”

“Spill the tea! Don’t worry, I won’t judge!”

“Are you sure? This is quite.. concerning for a mortal.”

“Yep!”

[You heard Ida heavily inhaling again. A little concerning...]

“It’s okay.. you can take your time.”

…

“My real name is not Ida. My real name is.. ‘ 'iida'atan ‘ . “

“Huh? Do you mean..”

“I am sorry-“

“Does that mean you can cure my curse?!”

“Yes. Yes I can. However.. it is time for you to know the real truth. You see.. ‘iida'atan’ is the deity The Church of The Eye worships. They praise them for their glory.. and that ‘deity’ is me..”

“ Ah.. iida'atan is also Illumina. Yes, I am Illumina… I know this must take one time to process.. I shall be here, right by your side.”

“Oh..”

[That was really a lot to process, huh.. the COTTE thingy.. the fact that “Ida” is actually Illumina..]

“Umm..”

“I -I still love you all the same! Nothing can change that!..”

[You weeped. It hurt her heart. To her very core…]

[No! Illumina, thy is the embodiment of purpose.. Thy is not supposed to..]

“Even if thy is planning to.. destroy a world filled of mortals?”

“Yes!”

[It really hurt to say that.]

[Illumina could not handle this, and out of pure grief and regret.. she held you tight. The last thing “one” felt was a sword behind one’s back. Blood splattered across the alleyway. No mortal deserves to know of her plan, however..]

[Illumina weeped.. and weeped.. and weeped. She couldn’t believe she had murdered the one mortal she trusted , and cared for.]

“I.. still love you all the same..”

#phighting #phighting!#exnoiafork req.#illuminakissers #Illumina phighting #phighting Illumina #illumina x reader #phighting x reader #Illumina x reader phighting

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ms-cartoon · 2 years ago

Text

Reason’s why I gradually started to hate Stolas from Helluva Boss

So some time ago there was a friend that asked me why I hated Stolas so much. At that time, I couldn’t think of a valid reason, mostly because it was just very few reasons. To them, those reasons weren’t valid enough. This was back when episode 2 season 1 was uploaded, but now that we’re already in season two and we’re about to get our 4th episode, HB has now given me PLENTY of reasons to despise Stolas and call him a bad character. So allow me to make a list. I can go from the first to the latest episode;

EP 1 S1, Murder Family

-- Stolas was watching Blitzo in a scuffle through his bath bubbles, which means he knew Blitzo was in danger, but still decided on calling him at the worst time! “Oh, when isn’t it a bad time, Blitzy~~~?” Umm, I dunno.... Maybe when some crazy psychopath is NOT chasing him with a gun!!! Did he even consider that he would’ve gotten Blitzo killed, and all just to make some stupid deal??? And besides, from what I’ve seen in episode 6 (which I’ll get into later) Stolas was so upset that Blitzo and the rest of IMP got caught by humans, he dropped an f-bomb. And now looking back in ep 1, he doesn’t even seem to care when Blitzo is chased by humans. If getting in trouble on earth like that is such a big deal, why couldn’t Stolas just wait to talk with Blitzo until after his job was done?

-- Speaking of said deal, Stolas agreed that he would let Blitzo keep the book in exchange for taking it back to take care of whatever was necessary and agreeing to spend one night each month having sex with him.

Alright, there are two things wrong with this. So, first off... Stolas decided on making a deal like this while seemingly knowing fully well Blitzo didn’t want anything to do with him. He knows how uncomfortable Blitzo is around him, about how disgusted and disturbed he is by his flirting but will still make Blitzo agree to this deal because he’s just that horny for him, regardless of how creeped out Blitzo’s is. And he knows Blitzo didn’t have much of a choice in that moment because, well he’s stuck in a predicament while on the phone with Stolas. I guess he might as well just go ahead and make it a deal so he could get the call over with (Or just frikin hang up on him). And also because Blitzo really needs the book to make it to the living world to finish his job.

.....And we’re supposed to believe Stolas actually “cares” for Blitzo?

And here’s the second problem; Looking back on it, this deal is completely pointless now!!! As it turns out, the grimoire isn’t the only access to the living world. In episode 1 of season 2, it’s revealed that there are magical crystals that demons could use to appear on earth anytime and any place they want. So in a way, Blitzo DID have a choice. He could’ve used those Asmodean crystals to go to the living world to continue his business. And sure, maybe it wouldn’t be that easy for him to get his hands on one. But even if that were the case, why not hire someone who does have Asmodean crystals?? Like - I dunno... a succubi perhaps???

Heh! No wonder Verosika and her peers we’re able to travel to earth so easily. Asmodean crystals are willingly given to succubi, which means that they also can go to Earth anytime they want with no issue. Blitzo could’ve at least just hired a succubus or something to help him have access to the living world. Why not do that, instead of having to agree to this deal where you have to have to continuously give the book back and get laid on the same night with a horned-up demon prince, especially when you don’t want to, which would only make your job harder than easier???

(And before some of you bring this up if you’re gonna, I know Blitzo has no room to feel uncomfortable with Stolas making advances towards him since that was kinda his fault. HE was the one that came onto him and decided to go through with sleeping with him outta pity. Even if it was to just to distract him so he could steal the book and leave, he still did it. And now that it happened, he has Stolas continuously flirting with him. I only brought up that Blitzo was feeling uncomfortable about it because that’s what the show made it seem like to us at that time. It wasn’t even hinted that Blitzo was the first to make a move. They just totally retconned that fact. I’m only just stating these based off of how I saw it at the time the episodes were aired.)

My whole point about this is, Stolas is pretty much taking advantage of Blitzo, manipulating him into agreeing to this deal, knowing full well that Blitzo (kinda) doesn’t have any choice in the matter since it would cost him to keep his business going and Stolas could drop this deal and never let Blitzo keep the book.

-- Calling Blitzo “My little Imp”. It’s not cute...

-- Him describing how he’ll screw Blitzo (eg. every time his words are bleeped out). This was supposed to be comedic, and while I did smile slightly the first time it happened, all it did was make me feel awkward and disturbed. Those were just the start of my disdain for Stolas. Believe me, it doesn’t end there. So, moving on....

EP 2 S1, Loo Loo Land

-- “I can not believe you slept with an imp! IN OUR F*CKING BED!!!”

“It was unexpected! I didn’t have time to book for a motel.”

Dude - what do you mean it was unexpected? That makes no sense, especially now that we learned you invited Blitzo into your room instead of having him kicked out. Even when he tried to make advances toward you, you still could’ve prevented that from happening. You had the full authority to make him stop and kick him out. I don’t care how drunk you were when it happen. And you didn’t have time for a motel?? More like you weren’t planning on it!! And besides, you’re a demon prince!! I’m pretty sure you could’ve opened up a portal to teleport into another location when you wanted. All this man is doing making excuses to cover his feathers and they’re not even valid!!

-- Stolas, as I may have established more than a few times already, is a terrible father!! There are a few reasons for this, but one of them being that he doesn’t listen to his daughter. And it’s almost sad, because he’s actually trying to bond with her (sorta). He suggested that he and Octavia go to Loo Loo Land because she liked it when she was a kid. But she’s 17 and doesn’t really care for that anymore, so she tells him no. But he still insists on taking her there, not even hearing her out!

“Let’s go to Loo Loo Land!”

“I’d rather kill myself.”

“That’s the spirit, anything better than staying in this house. Let’s go!”

It’s like he completely brushed off what she was telling him!! I don’t know if this was just for comedic effect or not, but this would count as a good example of Stolas being a bad father as he doesn’t listen to his daughter and is inconsiderate of her feelings.

-- Notices that his imp butler is injured (due to Stella’s rage) and doesn’t even bat an eye at it. Once again, probably for comedic effect, but this just goes to show how non-caring Stolas is of the imp race. The only reason why Blitzo is an exception is because he’s good at sex.

-- Didn’t Stolas just say, “Why don’t we go to Loo Loo Land? Just the TWO OF US?” Which would only imply that he intended to spend some time only with his daughter and nobody else?? Well, he just lied straight to her face!

-- The so-called Demon Prince wants to arrange for security for him and his daughter. He knows damn well he don’t need no security, but Blitzo is the one he decides to call for this arrangement. I think we all know why he really called him specifically.

-- “We’re rich and our hot.”

Referring to your 17-year-old daughter as “hot”. Can’t leave that outta my Stolas sh*t list. Not really something you should say in front of her. Or especially about her.

-- “I’m going to call the only man who can f*ck me.”

“Hello my big-d*cked Blitzy~~”

Again, not something you should say in front of your daughter!!!

-- Y’all I can’t stress this enough, but this is one of his main issues. The whole time he’s supposed to be spending time with Octavia and putting his attention on her, he’s flirting with Blitzo. Making sexual remarks at him, touching him, trying to get his attention while he’s working, “Blitzy” this, “Blitzy” that, “Blitzy” blah blah blah. Not only is he hardly paying attention to her, he’s doing all of this IN FRONT OF HER!! Not even noticing her grudging reactions or bitter behavior! It’s like he thinks she’s totally okay with her father being a flirt in public, especially with the man he cheated with on her mother.

-- Stolas can’t tell the difference between tears of joy and tears of terror with his daughter’s reaction to Robo Fizz.

-- Is saved by Moxxie and Millie, even though he didn’t need to be, and expects to be body-guarded like he’s a damsel in distress.

-- “Where’s Blitzy? He’s my night and shining armor! Not you... little-o ones!”

Bro-? Shut up and go find your daughter!

-- Doesn’t realize Octavia is feeling bad until she’s crying about it.

-- Makes excuses for his actions, but the show is gonna go ahead and make Octavia forgive him and just be worried about him leaving her so we could be okay with his actions and move on.

-- Decides now he wants to go ahead to turn somebody into stone even though he could’ve done it with a flick of a wrist tons of times before. I know he invited Blitzo to be his bodyguard and he was already doing most of the work, but he only invited him just to have him around and be a flirt like he always is. He really didn’t care about Blitzo protecting him. So yeah, he still could’ve protected himself and his daughter at least once before now.

Ep 5 S1, Harvest Moon Festival

-- Father of the Year here is gonna go right back to continuing his affair with Blitzo!!! That whole conversation between him and his daughter was just in one ear and out the other because the writers are just so desperate to want this ship to happen. And we just HAVE to have fanservice.

-- “My Grimoire shouldn’t be lent out to itty bitty imps, like yourself.”

Then maybe you could... I dunno... Drop the deal and stop exchanging the book????

He mentions that his grimoire is oh so important as if it shouldn’t be in the hands of just anyone, but has no problem willingly giving it Blitzo because he’s just that down and dirty. What does he even need that book for anyway??? We rarely see him use it!! When he does have it, he’s mostly just holding it... and that’s it. And we only see him use it for magic that one time at the festival. He doesn’t read it or even study it. If this book is so valuable to you sir, then ACT LIKE IT!! He could’ve used it as a study guide for Octavia, who’s supposed to be the next heir to the throne. If he’s not even gonna use it for himself, he could teach his daughter how to use it or cast spells with it. And no - a stupid Instagram post is NOT gonna cut it (especially when it’s not even canon).

-- Uses Blitzo’s horns to put out a cigar.... not cool.

-- Stolas invites Blitzo to the harvest moon festival for no reason other than to see him there and flirt with him. He says that it will be fun, as if the last time he invited Blitzo somewhere with him was a blast, but nobody was having fun but him. And the whole idea was for him to spend time with his frikin daughter!!

-- The whole time Stolas is talking to Blitzo, it doesn’t even seem like he’s flirting or being cute with him. He’s more or less just mocking him. (eg. pinching his cheeks and using his horns to put out a cigar.) Seriously, why does everyone act like this character is such a saint and is just as sweet as Charlie from hazbin?? He’s frikin awful!! He doesn’t care in the slightest about imps! He’s not even nice to Moxxie or Millie and he hires imps as his servants/slaves.

-- Don’t get me wrong, if y’all wanna love Stolas, then by all means, frikin ADORE HIM!! I don’t want to offend or insult anybody who does like him. But there is no way you can look passed all the bullsh*t he pulls and just act like he’s so sweet. Viv says that Stolas is flawed and is trying to get better and that’s how we’re supposed to see it. But all I see is a character being a selfish douche and staying a selfish douche while acting like the victim of a heinous crime and trying too hard to make us feel bad for him simply by “caring” about his daughter even though he neglects her and pretending he genuinely loved Blitzo all along and simply wants love from him too, even when he doesn’t deserve it because all he ever did was manipulate him and take advantage of him, seeing him as a sex toy and not a person with feelings! And what pisses me off about this is that he rarely gets reprimanded for his actions. When he does, he’ll start crying while feeling bad for himself and the show tries to make us feel bad for him. What’s worse about this is that he never learns either!! For real though, no matter how bad Stolas’s character is, most people in the fandom won’t even take the time to realize it or will probably look past it, as long as Stolas gets his happy ending with Blitzo. Like I said, I don’t wanna offend anyone, but if y’all think the relationship is anything along the lines of healthy or innocent, then your definition of love must be twisted.

-- “I hereby welcome you all to another year of celebrating the spoils of your labor.”

I’m not gonna hear this from a dude who uses his imp servant as a stress ball.

-- Lol! Bro just keeps stealing the microphone from Wally and interrupting him.

-- He reads a book about how to f*ck imps at dinner while his daughter is still at the table. And no, it doesn’t matter if she didn’t notice, it’s still not very appropriate.

Ep 6 S1, Truth Seekers

-- Stolas only had like less than a few seconds of screen time. He might as well not even show up.

-- Jumps in to save Blitzo and the others. That’s good, but then he adds on “My Impish little plaything” Reminding us that he sees Blitzo as a sex toy.

-- “Are you little creatures not being careful. If you get in trouble, then I get in trouble! We don’t want that, do we?”

Then maybe you shouldn’t have waited until the last minute to save them???? I mean - we all know you we’re watching Blitzo the entire time like a damn stalker. And besides, YOU’RE the one who agreed to lend them the book. If you’re so worried about them getting in trouble, then you could just FORGET about the deal so they could figure out another way to travel to earth, they could get in trouble on their own, and it wouldn’t be your problem anymore! And if you were just gonna get that irritable about it, why didn’t you jump in to try and save Blitzo the first time he almost got killed on earth.

-- Why doesn’t he go ahead and kill the agents?? Why would he let them live?? Since you don’t want to get in trouble so badly, wouldn’t it be necessary for you to kill them. I didn’t think that DEMON PRINCE would be this big of a softie.

-- Bro uses his hands to open up a portal..... (why does he need his book again?)

-- Expected a “thank you” from Blitzo for saving him. This dude’s life was in jeopardy just now, and you’re asking for sex? Very appropriate of you sir. And why is Blitzo reciprocating this lust for him all of a sudden??? The entire season, all he’s ever done was reject Stolas, back-talking him, and showing him attitude. He responded to his constant flirtatious remarks with disgust. He didn’t even like him and was uncomfortable with the idea of sleeping with him just to keep the book. And now he’s suddenly getting turned on??

Obviously, this scene was only written in this episode by Viv as an excuse for more Stolitz fanservice.

EP 7 S1, Ozzies

-- Stolas is feeling all sad and lonely, watching some corny soap opera while relating to the fact that the guy he has feelings doesn’t love him back...... Honey, ask me if I care. Blitzo would always tell you to f*ck off and you would respond with giggles and mockery. You should already know how uncomfortable he feels about you and most of the time, you don’t even care. What’s with the sudden depression??

-- Speaking of that, why does he suddenly have genuine feelings for Blitzo anyway?? You can’t tell me that he’s just now starting to love him out of the blue. You can’t even tell me he loved him at all this entire time!! The only emotion he’s ever had about Blitzo was nothing but pure lust!! He simply just wanted his d*ck. Not to mention he would look down on him like he does all the other imps.

-- The whole time during their date, Stolas is trying to converse with Blitzo, which is honestly surprising since the only time he ever talks to him is when he’s being a flirt and harassing him. You’d think I’d actually applaud him for that, except I can’t. Cuz, once again, where did this come from??? We didn’t get to see no type of development with Stolas at all. We didn’t get any episode of him slowly progressing to fall in love with Blitzo. Just more lust talk getting turned on.

-- How did Stolas not realize Asmodeus owned Ozzie’s? I think the title on it’s own should’ve implied as much. And besides, he should know that Asmodeus is a demon that represents lust and they’re in the lust ring.

-- Stolas sees Blitzo is pretty much getting laughed at and humiliated during the whole musical number and does nothing about it. Well, Blitzo kinda had it coming for not keeping his mouth shut and also spying on Moxxie and Millie, but I’m just proving a point that Stolas doesn’t even care about Blitzo like we’re supposed to think. He even hides behind his menu after getting called out by Asmodeus. We are supposed to feel bad for him here right?? Because the writers are just showing me he doesn’t deserve it.

-- While we’re on that subject, why is he hiding behind his menu? Why is he feeling embarrassed about being seen with Blitzo and Ozzie telling everyone his business about it?? This was NOT the only time he was seen in public with Blitzo!! There was episode 2 at Loo Loo Land and episode 5 at the festival, and he openly flirted with Blitzo in public in BOTH of those episodes!!! Hell, he was holding Blitzo’s hand in front of that guard and the other demons waiting in line!! He was sitting at a table in the open where one or two people could’ve taken a glance at him talking to Blitzo!!! He has NO RIGHT to feel humiliated about getting laid with him!

-- Trying his best to comfort Blitzo by holding his hand, talking to him, and inviting him in his home. He thinks that now would be the best time to cuddle with him after he tried to hide away from being seen with Blitzo. I don’t care what none of the fans say, Blitzo had every right to turn down Stolas and call him out on his bullsh*t. Most fans would say something like “NOO BLITZO!! DON’T BE LIKE THAT!!! STOLAS DOES CARE!! HE DOES LOVE YOU!!” Where the hell was this “love” you speak of the first few episodes these two were seen together??? No amount of cute nicknames, flirtatious remarks, and nightstands are ever going to sell the fact Stolas loved Blitzo.

-- He sits on his porch and starts to cry. We’re meant to feel bad and pity him, but all I’m doing is rolling my eyes.

EP 1 S2, The Circus

-- I don’t care how cute, uwu, or innocent they try to make little Stolas. Nothing in the world is ever going to make me change how I feel about him. He could be under three years old. Viv is pretty much just trying to force cutesy wutsey stuff onto the audience so we could side with Stolas and feel bad for him. All the writers are trying to do at this point is make excuses for his actions and use this whole episode to say Stolas had every right to cheat on Stella and that he actually really loved Blitzo when he really didn’t.

-- It makes no sense that Blitzo and Stolas are around the same age anyway. I don’t fully understand how the whole age and birth thing works with demons in hell, but first off, Blitzo was initially supposed to be in his twenties, meanwhile, Stolas has lived for a LONG A** TIME. Like he was probably born in 4000 BC. He still would’ve been an adult even before the time Blitzo was born. But now they retconned it to Stolas being the same age as Blitzo and them meeting as children just so Viv could force this ship to happen.

-- No way in hell he fell in love with Blitzo at first sight. Viv and writers are really trying too hard to make this childhood friendship cute.

-- Goes along with Blitzo’s game to steal everything in the mansion and completely falls for his trick (did he ever get grounded for that?).

-- Instead of having Blitzo kicked out because he should be nothing but a stranger to him at this point, he instead invites him to his room so the two can... catch up. Did Stolas ever find out about what Blitzo did when they were children?? If so, then why are you even being nice to this guy?? You cannot be that down and dirty for him.

-- It has been frikin TWENTY-FIVE YEARS since the last time these two have seen each other. Why’re they talkin’ like they’re old friends? They had that one playdate and never saw each other ever again. If anything, I don’t even think they should remember each other.

-- “I know it’s been a long time, but I have a very good memory.”

“What are you doing? I don’t even remember you’re name.”

“Wait, didn’t your name end in an “O”? I remember...”

Oh my god- DO YOU REMEMBER HIM OR NOT!!!???

-- We jump into this softcore scene way too fast. Kinda goes to show you how rushed this show is.

-- For a demon so powerful with standards, he seems to have no problem being submissive and letting Blitzo seduce him. Stolas is shown to be uncomfortable, continuously walking away from Blitzo when he's pursued and I'm sitting here like....you could just...stop him. Why do you keep running away from him when you can throw him out the window?? He's acting like some shy teenage girl who's about to have sex for the first time but secretly craves it and I couldn't help but cringe!! And the first time he did it was with his wife, which apparently wasn't as good. Like I said, I really don't care how drunk he was at that time. He is such an idiot.

-- These two haven’t seen or talked to each other in over twenty years, but suddenly this kinky owl is all for sleeping with him because he’s drunk and got bit in the neck.

-- “It means so much that the one who wants me is my first-ever friend~~~”

First off, ew.... Second off, you two were never friends. You met him once, had that one playdate, and never saw each other again until now in your thirties.

-- Back in the second episode of the first season, when Stella found out about the affair, she confronted him about it and he tried to appease her and being submissive, saying that what happened with Blitzo was unexpected and making excuses, all the while being a little nervous at her rage. But in THIS episode, Stolas has the balls to rub it in Stella’s face and laugh, marking the affair as the first action of the divorce.

-- Even though he brought up said divorce, for some reason, these two are still living in the same house. Not even divorced yet!! What was the point in you laughing at her face like that if you weren’t even gonna go along with it??

-- He should’ve known that his book was stolen by the time Blitzo left! This means he should’ve realized that Blitzo only slept the night with him to take it and leave. Why are you even catching feelings for this dude?? He manipulated you twice!!!

-- Literally, screw this musical number....

-- Sings, “Was what we had all a comfortable lie?” or something like that. Basically, he’s saying, “Was your love for me all a lie?” Was it all a lie??? He certainly wasn’t playing hard-to-get, dumbass!! Blitzo was shown multiple times to be disgusted with you! He didn’t love you at all, and I’m sure you knew that!

-- Reads about Asmodean crystals. Possibly planning to give it to Blitzo so he could drop the deal. But he never does.

-- “The only reason why I put up with your constant cruelty was for that girl (Octavia) to live a normal life.”

Says the guy who had an affair and continues the affair, making the drama in his family much worse than it already was. What was the point in you two keeping up an image for Via? You already fight in front of her and that was bad enough. It should’ve been obvious to her from the get-go that you to hated each other. It doesn’t even seem like she cares at all about the divorce after this episode, so this could’ve been done a long time ago.

-- Decides NOW he wants a divorce even though it should’ve been done already.

EP 2 S2, Seeing Stars (are they even trying with these titles)

-- Makes a promise about something to his daughter and breaks it.

-- Doesn’t take the time to listen to Octavia when she’s trying to talk to him and instead wants to continue bickering with Stella over the phone like they’re a couple of middle-school ex-lovers. I mean, he could just hang up on her. He probably never even wanted to talk to her anyway.

-- “Via, can we talk about this later? Your mother is being a real B-I-T-C-H.”

For the third damn time... NOT SOMETHING YOU SAY FRONT OF YOUR DAUGHTER!

-- Didn’t realize Octavia was gone until he was called about it and even somewhat blamed IMP for her taking the book and leaving instead of taking responsibility since he is the father and wasn’t paying attention to her. If I had to assume, he was probably still on the phone with Stella at the time and only decided to hang up because Blitzo was calling him, not when his daughter is trying to grab his attention.

-- Has the ability to turn into a human, but is useless without his book when it comes to other magic which sounds like total bullsh*t. He can turn people into stone, make portals, use telekinesis, fly, and turn into a giant bird demon. All WITHOUT a grimoire. He even says he can’t remember a spell for turning other demons into a human, but didn’t he say “I have a very good memory.” back in episode 6? Stolas is only useless when the plot wants him to be.

-- The entire episode, he spends more time with Blitzo and helping him with his issues instead of trying to look for his daughter. She had the possibility of getting into danger, but he’s more concerned with his friend with benefits and what he got going on? Some father.....

-- Is back... to flirting... with Blitzo. Clearly, he didn’t learn a damn thing in the last season. What exactly was he even singing about in the last episode?? They didn’t even talk anything out after the whole Ozzie’s incident!! And of course, the writers are gonna have Blitzo get all flustered and gain feelings for Stolas because they and the fans want this ship to happen soo badly.

-- When Blitzo is in danger, what’s the one thing the powerful demon prince does to save him?

-- Decides NOW to continue looking for Octavia?? Literally, f*ck off!

-- Octavia is forced to forgive Stolas despite his selfish behavior for the second time. Because neglecting your daughter, whether it be for your ex-lover or your walking booty call, is just very forgiving.

-- Screw this happy a** ending...

That’s pretty much the gist of why I think Stolas is a terrible character and why I hate him. I haven’t forgotten the recent episode that was just uploaded a couple of days ago. Believe me, that will be saved for another post I’ll be making soon.

So yeah, Stolas is a terrible character, a terrible person, and a terrible father. I don’t care how innocent or pitiful Viv or Adam make him out to be. At this point, all they’re doing is making excuses for his actions, making every other character around him terrible to make him look good, and forcing the Stolitz ship to happen without any progress or build-up. And God forbid Stolas is ever reprimanded for his actions! If he does, the writers will just butcher that in a way where Stolas is the victim and making him feel all bad for himself while not taking responsibility. Is this enough for you, anon???? I hope so, cuz at this point, it’s enough said.

#Stolitzo #anti stolitz #anti helluva boss #anti blitzo #anti stolas #helluva boss blitzo #helluva boss criticism #helluva boss critical #helluva boss critique #vivziepop critical

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