#also tos mckirk oh ship of my heart

[dustykneed]

what if i furred your spones. what then

anyways... bunch of misc doods (most if not all courtesy of the mcspirk server loll 🩵💙💛)

[bearsinpotatosacks]

Why Lose Hope?- Chapter 2

Chapter 1 , Part 1 of the All the Little Things Seem so Insignificant Now Series

Jim ran from the transporter, his crew behind him as he raced to reach the bridge. The transporter itself being broken from the strain of trying to deliver seven people to another universe. 

He slid in his chair and lent forwards as if it would bring him closer to Bones. They'd somehow managed to get an image on the two versions of him in that universe and had been watching them for the entire ten hours he'd been gone. 

It was bittersweet watching him. Bones' smiles were sour and his movements freaked from the weight of the possibility he may never go home. Yet he carried on. He cared for Leonard, for the animals and crops all while telling tales of his universe, his ship all those miles away.

"Scotty, tell me you've got some good news,"

"Well, Captain, it's fixable but it'll take an hour minimum," The pain was obvious in his voice. "The most you could do is watch for the time being,"

"Thank you, Mr Scott," 

He knew what that meant for Bones, another year until he could see anyone he loved again. Although he had spent the entire time with the other Leonard McCoy, perhaps he loved him? Did it count as self love when it was an alternate version of himself?

It had only been a few seconds for them, but when he looked back at the screen,a week had already passed. Spock had done the calculations, a year for them is an hour on the ship, a month is five minutes and one and a quarter minutes was a week.

Leo, their Bones, was sitting on the porch covered in a blanket. He'd taken ill quickly, their hypotheses had been that a planet with worse technology than they had, even regressing back before the third world war, would be less equipped to handle severe illnesses. 

Leonard was sitting on the other side of the table with half a scarf hanging off his knitting needles. He was talking about something to do with their farm when Leo broke the calm, coughing and spluttering.

"Here," He handed him a glass of water. "Take a nice long drink and you'll be fine,"

Leo did as he was told and lent back in his chair, face a little paler from the exertion of his remaining energy. The weather had changed rapidly in the time he'd been away, everywhere was blue skies and sunshine.

"How about I give you something to take your mind off things?" Leonard asked, only getting a grunt from Leo. "When did you meet your Jim?"

The crew all turned to face him. Uhura giving an amused glance, Spock something actually questioning and everyone else seemingly on the verge of rolling their eyes.

"When d'you meet yours?"

"It was 2255, I was working on a starbase somewhere, a medicine focused one, and I rush over to see a young man, six years younger than me, trying to escape with an IV line in, bandages on, nasal cannula and osteocalcium cream on his legs. He was also on the verge of passing out and was politely yelling at the guard to let him leave," He looked at Leo. "That was when I met James T. Kirk,"

"Sounds pretty on brand for him," Jim tried not to be hurt by that statement, even if he knew it was true.

"I saw him pretty much every day for about eight months, he was recovering from a serious injury involving radiation, an explosion and some angry octosquidarians. Became quite a good friend of mine even when he got transferred out of the ICU. He left, of course, everybody did on that starbase, yet we still managed to keep in touch and when he had his own ship and needed a CMO, well there was only one man for the job," He said and smiled to himself.

There was something about his age, his grey hair and wrinkles that made his smile more heartfelt. Perhaps it was the knowledge that he'd had more years with his Jim, more loving moments and annoying mishaps. He had nostalgia in his eyes as he sighed and turned to Leo.

"How'd'ya meet your Jim?"

"On a shuttle to Starfleet Academy, I was being forced out of my place in the bathroom-"

"Bathroom?"

"I have aviophobia," He nestled into the blankets further. "Jim's face was covered in blood, he'd been in a fight, and I was kind of drunk and spouted all the ways we could die on the thing and how my wife took everything. Then when we landed I found out he was in the same student apartment as me,"

"He was little shit most of the time, but he's also my best friend and the love of my life," 

He stopped and stared out for a moment. Jim was glad, he couldn't take it anymore. It had only been a few hours without him but he knew it had been so much longer for Bones. 

Part of him wondered while they were waiting for the transporter modifications if he'd even love him anymore. Ten years could change a lot in a person, he would know. He went into town and could've easily fell in love with a local, but he didn't. He still loved him and he still loved Spock.

Speaking of which, the other Leonard asked their Bones another question, "When did you realise you loved your Spock?"

"You remember how I had to resurrect Jim?"

Leonard nodded.

"Well, with Spock being a scientist in multiple fields, he could help me in making the serum. He took my place when I was on the verge of collapse from fatigue or hunger or emotion, and I ain't told anyone this, but I meditated with him on the little time I had off and it actually helped," 

Jim smiled at Spock at the image of the two. Bones probably complained that it was useless for an overthinker like him or about the sitting positions being too convoluted for his old joints. Spock had suggested they all meditate together, one of the few couple activities Vulcans were known to do. 

"And when Jim woke up and I couldn't handle the pressure of caring for him and the tabloids calling me Dr. Frankenstein and the looks from all the other doctors and pharmacists and every other medic in the hospital. So Spock listened as I ranted and cried and-" He stopped and took a few deep breaths. "And I realised, oh shit, I think I'm falling for him,"

"Well that's very romantic. When did you tell Jim?" 

"There was a mission involving loss, they made us see supposed ghosts of people we lost and Spock was determined to say he wasn't affected. But Jim invited him over and after a few hours of awkward silences and denying the connection we were feeling, we admitted our feelings to each other,"

"How about you?" He said.

"Spock had a thing, a Vulcan thing that meant he had to go home-"

"Pon farr?"

Leonard nodded, "Things happened, to survive we had to fake Jim's death, Spock didn't know but when he realised he was alive they finally admitted their feelings for each other. Unfortunately for me I realised I loved the bastards," He carried on knitting with a little more ferocity. "It wasn't until we found a giant space amoeba and Spock won our 'Who's going to sacrifice themselves for the sake of science argument' that I realised I should've told him,"

He chuckled to himself, "Well, we managed to save him, of course, and I took that as a sign and told them they had my heart. And apart from a little bump after the five year mission, we ain't never looked back,"

Jim and Spock smiled at each other. They'd visited Ambassador Spock and willed him to tell them his stories like children on Pesach. About peaceful Sunday mornings when he'd meditate and they'd secretly watch their Leonard get ready for church. And about many trips to Vulcan where the Ambassador would show them off like trophy husbands.

They could tell he missed his Jim and Bones, a nostalgic look always distant in his eyes and his house filled with the various photos and videos he kept on his PADD when he went through the black hole. 

At the time, they didn't understand what that felt like, to miss someone with every fibre of your soul. But after watching their Bones survive years and years alone without them, they realised how strangely comforting such an ache was.

The screen in front of them sped up as time drifted on. Relative as ever. Jim took a deep breath as Yeoman Rand handed everyone coffee and settled back in his chair for a long few hours.

I've managed to put a few headcanons of mine into this, like old married mcspirk's habit of Spock meditating, Bones getting ready for church and Jim smiling goofily as he watches his husband get dressed in his sunday best. Also I made up a few things for TOS Mckirk's meeting but the main idea I got from memory alpha is that Jim got hurt in his pre-captain days and met Bones. I would very much like to see this meeting somehow.

This fic will get weirder quite quickly and the schedule I think I might go with is one chapter in the farm universe, one in one of the crew's universe's, back to the farm universe and one in the other crew's universe.

And finally, I added Yeoman Rand! I'm very much in the camp of "I'll add all the recurring characters in tos into aos because someone (JJ Abrams) didn't" so I hope you enjoyed her cameo!

[pherryt]

10 or 21 for McKirk.

This...did not stay short. I tried. I really really tried. but it’s still a little over 1k! I also kept trying to do research for planets and diseases from TOS. So i think i spent at least half the time i was writing this actually researching. Well, trying to.

10. ‘If there’s no food, I’m going home.’

21. ‘I’m trying to have a serious conversation with you.’

I somehow managed to incorporate both, though the focus is on 21.

Star Trek, McKirk, Confessions, Misunderstandings

 Jim Kirk stared at his Chief Medical Officer in frustration.“Bones, I’m trying to have a seriousconversation with you!”

Leonard’s brow rose and his mouth twisted up. “Since when doesJim Kirk do those?”

“Since when – what? Are you kidding me? I have seriousconversations with you all the time!” Jim gritted out in exasperation.

Leonard snorted and turned away, fiddling with a piece ofequipment Jim only had a very vague idea of what it did. “Right, like that timeyou threatened to leave a peace talk – risking an international incident, mightI add - because they didn’t have any food.”

“That was serious!Don’t you remember? I was still recovering from the Altarian Flu and I hadn’teaten in like, a week!” Jim protested. “And I wasn’t really gonna leave.”

“What about that time you tried to convince Sulu someone wasmessing with his plants?”

“Well, how was I supposedto know that that species of flora regularly uprooted itself to take a walk?”

“You could have asked him, seeing as he is the botany expert on board,” Leonard pointed out reasonably, buthis shoulders were tense and his movements stiff.

Jims eyes narrowed. “Wait, wait…Bones…turn around and lookat me.”

“I’m busy, Jim,” Leonard snapped out.

Jim reached forward and touched Leonard’s shoulder softly,drawing him around. The doctor looked nervous as he scowled at his captain.Beneath the scowl was something else and Jim focused on that with laser beamprecision.

“What do you think is going on here, Bones?” Jim asked softly,trying to catch the doctor’ hazel eyes. Normally straightforward and not one toshy away from direct eye contact, Jim was finding this difficult as Leonardavoided his gaze.

“Nothing is going on here, except you’re likely to complainabout the state of your love life, again. Which, really Jim, what makes youthink I’m interested in hearing about your conquests or one-night stands?”

Jim stared, mouth agape. “What conquests? Or one-nightstands? Jesus, Bones, what do you really think of me?”

Leonard finally looked at Jim, and he could see hurt andconfusion and anger roiling through his eyes, though his face was still twistedin the same scowl as usual. “What, that wasn’t you flirting with what’s-her-name,the ambassadors’ daughter only yesterday? Or putting the moves on that pilotfrom uh…what was it, Rigel, just last week? I thought you were gonna hop intohis ship when he finished resupplying. Not to mention when you came back from aweek on Risa completely exhausted – I wonder why that was? Hmmm?”

Jim started laughing. “Oh my god. You’re jealous!”

Leonard’s eyes narrowed further. “Like I said. Not a seriousconversation then.” He turned his back and made to walk away and Jim’s laughterabruptly stopped.

“No, but Bones – Leonard– “ Leonard froze and Jim moved closer. “That’s just it. The flirting was justflirting it didn’t mean anything. I can’t help it, plus, y’know, diplomaticrelations and all. The pilot? Sure, he was hot, but you should have seen the modifications he had on hisship! I had to tell Scotty all about them, see if there were any that madesense to incorporate in our own engine rooms. And Risa? I went mountain climbingand hiking and…maybe got lost in the woods for a couple of days. That’s prettyfreaking exhausting.”

Jim lightly tugged at Leonard’s shoulder, sliding his handdown his arm and grasping the doctor’s hand. “Look at me, please?” he asked,softly.

Leonard shivered and turned, slowly. Jim smiled at him. “You’reinfuriating, you know that?” Leonards’ brow shot up and his mouth opened and Jimhurried to place a finger over his lips. “Shh, wait, okay?” He paused and tooka breath. “Look, when I came in here, I was going to ask you to accompany me tothe ambassadorial dinner. As my date. As a realdate, not just an excuse to keep the ambassadors’ daughter at bay. That’s justa bonus.”

“A date?” Leonard stared at Jim incredulously, the doubtclear in every line of his body, his face, his most expressive eyes.

“Yeah, if that’s, I mean…I dunno if you’re interested. You’venot once dated anyone since I met you and I don’t know if you’re even attractedto men but I couldn’t just not try anymore.I had to know if this was one sided or not, if I had a chance or if I shouldjust…give up.” Jim’s words flew out in a breathless rush, a perfect babble, abit of panic trying to rise up. He ruthlessly shoved it down. If he could captaina starship, face down Nero and Khan and Krall – and countless others – he coulddo this. He could put his heart on the line and wait for his best friend toeither embrace it or stomp on it.

“Don’t you dare,” Leonard rasped out. Jim’s heart sank, andhis eyes cast downwards, nearly closing before Leonard continued. “Jim Kirkdoesn’t give up. That’s not the man I know and love.”

Eyes shooting upwards, Jim looked back at Leonard only theDoctor smiling shyly at him. Hope shot back into Jim’s heart, and he swallowed.“Y-yeah?”

“Yes, you dumbass. For a long time now. Why the hell do youthink I’m even out here, huh? I hate space!” Jim could see Leonard gearing upfor a long rant or lecture about the dangers of spacefaring but he was toogiddy to process it. Grinning boldly now, he touched Leonards’ cheek and thedoctor stopped, his words trailing off, both of them getting lost in the other’seyes.

“You gonna kiss me or what?” Leonard finally asked.

“Not yet,” Jim said, his eyes a twinkle. “Gotta have aproper date first.”

“Oh, is that how it’s gonna be?” Leonards’ lips twitched upin a smirk.

“You bet your ass, that’s how it’s gonna be.” Jim’s grinonly grew wider and Leonards’ eyes softened even more.

They were so lost in each other that neither noticed Chapelwalk into the room, shut her mouth, roll her eyes and walk right back out.

She had some bets to collect on.

Finally.

[starfleetorbust]

Heyhey for the character thing can you do Bones for me? Thanks lovely! ❤❤❤

How I feel about this characterSlowly falling? Like very slowly, but definitely… headed there. McCoy is smart and clever and he knows his job. He’s caring and compassionate about his crew. AndheisprettybutIdidn'tsaythat But I don’t know much about him outside work other than headcanons. I admit I love him being a southern guy and the idea that he has an accent even if he doesn’t. I like that he’d have that manner and charm part of him ingrained, and that’s how I write him. I like McCoy. ^-^ 7/10 because arbitrary numbers are nice

All the people I ship romantically with this characterOh gosh. Not many, honestly. He holds his heart in a locked box and shares is sparingly.Okay. Spock, definitely. Spones is adorable and I’ve actually been looking for a good prompt to write about them. I want to showcase the banter though, and its hard to find the right topic of debate. I used to write them a lot. I think you’d love my take xDJim. But… Jim is weird. I ONLY ship McKirk at the Academy, which is the place I think is the least likely for them to HAVE a relationship. I don’t see them together on the ship or after. I still haven’t decided WHAT happened between the Academy and the Enterprise if I see them together and then not, but somehow I think it had to be more than “we’re working so it won’t work” but not so extreme as “you cheated and this can’t be fixed”. I THINK it has something to do with Spock. I’ll keep you updated on that front. I want that headcanon set in stone before sharing it.I also think McCoy and his wife were probably really cute together? We never se them but I still ship it. They clearly had a kid in TOS (well… TAS?) and again, something must have gone wrong, but I don’t see it as a BAD relationship.Unpopular one, but I ship mirror Spock and Bones… just because I can. >->

My non-romantic OTP for this characterChapel. I’m sorry, but no, I just can’t see it. First off, she’s actually interested in Spock and I don’t think that Bones would interfere, but even if he did or she wasn’t, they work together on the ship as colleagues and that’s where I think their relationship is best.Scotty I also can’t see romantically. Friends? Yes. Drinking buddies? Sure. But totally can’t see romance there.

My unpopular opinion about this character…well I know it’s unpopular to say I’m scared of him. Like actually would be terrified to meet and wouldn’t trust him AT ALL if I had to. Like, he’d do his job, and I know that rationally, but I think I’d refuse any treatment from him if I got the choice. Ask for another doctor. Sorry.Um… canonly? I’m not sure. Can I come back to this xD

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.This is hard D: I think I likewhat we do see of him, and I don’t exactly want to change itWell…. I wish he met the EMH. I don’t know the timelines well enough but… TNG and DS9 and VOY are… around the same time and he is in TNG… so it cculd be possible?I’d like to see McCoy risk his life for someone he doesn’t know. I know there’s one where he does… the Empath or something? Where he tries to give himself for Jim and Spock? But those are his friends. Close friends. I want to see him and OTHER crewman that he’s never had to work with. Or someone we don’t even know on some planet. Because that’s who he is and he values ANYONE over himself, not just “the bridge crew” like it sometimes seems. Maybe that already happens but I don’t think it does.

@kaitymccoy123

@speedsterspock (whoops, saw your ask a moment after posting this xD)

[emotionalties]

I spent my sick day at home writing this. It started out as an exploration of the fact that TOS Bones has Joanna but AOS Bones doesn’t. It includes a few other things I’ve been thinking about lately, like AOS Bones’s parents asking about his love life.

Title: Uncertainty

Summary: TOS and AOS Bones visit with family members during shore leave.

Ships: McKirk

Other Star Trek works referenced: Star Trek: Ongoing #17 comic

TOS

“Will you be able to visit?” his mother asked for the fifth time.

“Definitely,” he said at first, then paused. “Maybe.”

Leonard wanted to be reliable, but he knew there was a chance shore leave could be canceled because of strange or important situations that arise on their way back to Earth. He regretted the possibility of letting down his family again.

His mother always knew what to say to make absolutely certain that he wouldn’t flake out on them again – or at least make him feel guilty about it if he did. “Joanna misses you.”

He sighed. He wished this week would finish quickly and uneventfully so he could get the hell out.

AOS

Leonard’s heart sank when he realized the two events that coincided next week: The day Jenny, his last young patient before he left for Starfleet, lost her battle against an incurable disease, and the day he would visit Demora during the crew’s shore leave. Demora always liked to catch up with the crew members her dad worked with and hear their stories. Jenny would have loved that, too.

He sighed and wished he could somehow get out of it. He wasn’t feeling up to pretending to be happy while Jenny’s ghost lingered in his memory. “Maybe I can fake an illness,” he said jokingly. He sat back in his chair at his desk, knowing he had no choice but to wait and see what adventures the week ahead threw at them.

TOS

He knew the owner of the hushed, worried voice right away. “Jim!”

Jim turned around to see the doctor in the turbolift, beckoning him inside before the doors closed. “What is it, Bones?” he asked, cautious as he entered. His friend looked very agitated. He hoped he hadn’t done anything wrong. Had he skipped a medical exam? Probably.

As Leonard hesitated, Jim realized he almost looked… guilty. He put a hand on his shoulder. “What’s wrong?”

“I’m sorry, Jim,” he said while bouncing very slightly on his toes in a worried fashion. “I know this mission has pushed back our shore leave, but I need to request to be dropped off on Earth anyway.”

Jim wasn’t thrilled about the idea, but he knew his friend must have a good reason. “Are you going to tell me what’s wrong or am I going to have to pry it out of you?”

He put his hands behind his back. “Well, as you know, for shore leave I was going to visit my parents and my daughter, Joanna.”

“Yes.”

“At first it sounded like it would be okay to delay the visit, but they told me some upsetting news.”

“Out with it, Bones.”

Leonard sighed. “Joanna is sick.”

Jim suddenly had both hands on his shoulders and he looked him in the eye. “How sick? Is she okay?”

“She’s fine, it’s nothing serious,” Leonard looked guilty again. “She just needs rest but I…”

“You want to be there for her.”

“Yes, very much.”

Jim smiled and softened his grip. “Shore leave granted.”

Leonard instantly perked up and smiled. “Thank you, Jim. I really appreciate it.”

AOS

Leonard was a bundle of nerves as he exited the ship. He couldn’t believe he felt so much anxiety getting off the ship and putting his feet back on the ground. Normally solid ground for short leave was a good thing. He left the terminal, following Hikaru out. Uhura and Spock passed by him. No one had any idea what significance this day had for him.

Demora of course ran up to her father first. Uhura waved at her excitedly as she looked at them from over her father’s shoulder. She made everyone’s hearts melt as she smiled and waved back.

Beyond Hikaru and Demora stood Ben, also smiling, and two people he did not expect to see. The tall woman looked just as anxious as Leonard was. As everyone gathered around Hikaru and Ben, her eyes were wide as she asked who the helmsman was.

“I have no idea how you crazy people do it,” she said, but she gave Hikaru a thumbs up. “Space travel is terrifying and you’re a brave, brave man.”

The members of the Enterprise crew all turned and looked straight at Leonard as if to say “Sounds familiar.”

“Mom? Dad? What are you doing here?”

He was so shocked to see them that he doubted his own senses for a second. Then he felt a slap on his back. Suddenly Jim was next to him, winking. “Your parents are here? Imagine that!”

“Did you have something to do with this?” Leonard asked him.

“Maybe,” Jim said. He smiled. “Definitely.”

Leonard couldn’t help but smile as Jim immediately jumped forward to shake hands with his parents. “It’s so nice to finally meet you, Mr. and Mrs. McCoy,” Jim said eagerly. “I’m Captain James. T. Kirk.”

“The pleasure is all ours, Captain,” Mrs. McCoy sounded impressed as she emphasized his title. “I was just telling your helmsman here-”

“All right, all right,” Leonard pushed his way through the crowd to finally greet his parents with a hug. His mom squeezed him tightly while his dad nodded clapped him hard on the back. “When are you two going to tell me why you’re here? How are you here?”

His mother cleared her throat, suddenly conscious that there were many people listening. “Well, sweetheart,” her hand trailed down his arm and gave his hand a squeeze. “We missed you and figured it was time to pay you a visit instead of the other way around.”

“We had some help from the captain, here,” his father said warmly.

The hand squeeze was enough to let Leonard know that they were worried about him. Great, just what he needed. Worried parents butting into his business.

“How did you manage to get mom onto a spacecraft?” he teased instead of acknowledging the hand squeeze.

“I know how hard it was for you,” she defended herself. “I’m your mother. If you can do it, I can do it.”

Demora, sitting in Hikaru’s arms, tapped Leonard’s shoulder with her tiny hand. He turned his head to her and was met with a quizzical face.

“Uncle Len, are you leaving with your parents?”

“Oh, uh,” Leonard wondered what to do. This could be the “way out” he desperately wanted a week ago, but he couldn’t say no to that adorable face. “Tell you what. You can go play with your other uncles and aunts now while I take my parents out to lunch, then later we can have some one-on-one time to discuss the latest gossip from sickbay.”

She smiled and nodded, satisfied with his answer. He smile and waved to everyone as the groups split up. He heard his mother sigh. “She’s a darling.”

“She sure is.”

He felt a hand squeeze again. Now that everyone was gone, he rolled his eyes. “All right, Mama,” he said, squeezing back. “What are you worried about now?”

She raised her other hand to his face and rubbed his cheek, her eyes now moist. “Oh, sweetheart,” her tone was now serious, but the kindness was still there. “Don’t think I don’t know how much you want a family.”

Several feet away, Jim turned to look back, catching them in a small, emotional family huddle.

TOS

When Leonard entered the second bedroom at his parents’ house – what used to be his bedroom – where his daughter was supposed to be resting, he did not find her sleeping even though it was getting late. Instead, she was watching a children’s movie. He took a few minutes to stand in the doorway to watch her before going into Doctor Dad mode. He put his hands on his hips and cleared his throat loudly. “Joanna.”

Her head whipped around and she smiled widely at him. “Daddy!”

“Shouldn’t you be sleeping?”

Before the divorce, Joanna would make a cute “I got caught” face and quickly hide under her blanket. Now that he was gone so often, times like this were a special occasion. Instead, she threw the blanket to the side and jumped out of the bed.

“You came!” she ran into him and wrapped her arms around him.

“Oof!” he said. “My my, you’re getting so big now!”

He was still able to sweep her up and plop her back on the bed. “Word on the street is you’re sick!”

She pouted as he pulled out his scanner. “Dad, it’s my vacation,” she grumbled. “I can’t be sick.”

He paused as he read the scanner’s results. “According to this, you need lots of rest.”

She crossed her arms and stared at the floor, clearly very upset that her father was being her doctor as soon as he arrived.

“It’s ok, Jo,” he said, relenting. “Tell you what. We can finish the movie as long as you promise me you’ll get plenty of rest afterwards.”

Her blinding smile returned. “Deal!”

She scooted over on the mattress to make room for him. He obediently sat down and swung his legs over to stretch out in front of him. The movie playing was an oldie Disney movie called Treasure Planet.

“Boy, that robot sure is annoying,” he said after a few minutes. Joanna giggled.

As he expected, Joanna leaned her head on his shoulder and was soon falling asleep. He turned the movie and the lights off and slowly drifted off with her.

AOS

“I promise I’m fine. I’m looking after myself,” Leonard pleaded his parents to believe him. They were sitting across from him in a booth at a restaurant. “Don’t I look good?”

They stared at him, neither one looking convinced.

“Honey,” his mother began. “When was the last time you were romantically intimate with someone?”

“Oh god,” Leonard covered his eyes with his hand. “Is this really why you’re here? To check up on my love life?”

“It’s been years, Len!” his mother said. “We haven’t heard about anyone in any of your letters in a long time.”

“Well, to be fair, we have heard about one person,” his dad interjected. “That captain of yours.”

“Yes! He looks like a fine young man. Are you sure there’s no one here you could be happy with? It is possible. I noticed two beautiful couples we met earlier.”

Leonard groaned. To his relief, the waitress came by with their drinks. He nodded, gave his thanks, and quickly brought the glass to his lips to avoid speaking. He could feel his ears go red. His parents were having nothing of it.

“Put that down, Len,” she pulled at his arm. “Look, I’m not asking for too much. I just want to know if you’re really okay. It’s the anniversary of Jenny’s death and your divorce. It’s been years but you’re still alone.”

“I got divorced because I was too consumed with my job to commit, remember?” he said. “I can’t even commit to revealing every detail of my life to satisfy you two!”

A silence descended over the table after his outburst. He looked away and took another sip from his drink. Finally, he felt a hand on top of his.

“You’re not holding yourself back as a punishment, are you?” his mother asked quietly. “Are you happy?”

He didn’t answer. Their food arrived.

TOS

The next morning Leonard woke up early to make a healthy breakfast with his mother. Joanna didn’t wake up until he reentered the room with a tray of oatmeal and fruit. She blinked at him groggily and shifted up against her pillow as he carefully placed the tray over her lap. She grimaced.

“Oatmeal? How boring.”

“Oh, well if that’s how you feel, I’ll take it back.”

“No!” she quickly shielded the tray with her hands. “It’s okay.”

He looked carefully over his shoulder as if he might get caught doing something wrong. “If you eat all of this, I snuck in some chocolate.” He flashed a peek of the piece of chocolate in his hand.

She beamed and held her hand out. He shook his head and pointed to the oatmeal. “Eat this first.”

She wrinkled her nose at him, but picked up the spoon anyway. “Tell me about the Enterprise.”

“Tell me about school.”

Now she looked over at him irritatingly. “The Enterprise is way more interesting than school.”

“In my day I thought school was fun, but I haven’t been at school in a long time,” he twirled his hand, trying to egg her on.

“I’m on vacation,” she said with a wicked smile. “No talking about school allowed.”

“All right, fine,” he said.

“What happened on your last adventure?”

“Let’s see,” he rubbed his chin thoughtfully. “It might be too scary for you.”

“Oh come on,” she complained. “If I want to be a doctor like you when I grow up, shouldn’t I be prepared for the scary?”

“You want to be a doctor?”

She looked at him for a moment and then laughed. “Just kidding. I want to be a ballerina.”

He raised an intrigued eyebrow at her. “A ballerina, huh?”

“Yeah. If I wasn’t sick right now I’d show you some moves.”

“A ballerina. I like it,” he said. She looked at him suspiciously. “There’s nothing scary about ballet.”

AOS

“I might be a nurse when I grow up,” Demora said. She used Leonard’s scanner to monitor her stuffed animal at the park.

“A nurse, huh?” Leonard said. “Not a helmsman like your dad?”

“Nah, Daddy talks so much about it that I’m kind of tired of hearing it.”

Leonard, Hikaru and Ben all laughed together.

“Did you always want to be a doctor when you grew up, uncle Len?” she asked.

It took a few moments for Leonard to answer. He had this exact conversation with Jenny those years ago. Jenny had wanted to be a Starfleet Captain, but she only lived long enough to tell him about it. He swallowed his sadness for Demora’s sake.

“To be honest, I wanted to be a pro-basketball player.”

Even louder laughter from the dads resulted from his words. Leonard glared at them. “Everyone always laughs when I say this!”

“I’m sorry,” Hikaru said, wiping away tears. “I just can’t imagine you on a basketball court.”

“I can!” Demora raised her arm in the air.

“Well, thank you. You’d be the first,” Leonard said, smiling sweetly at her but glaring at her fathers.

“How do I read this?” Demora finally asked, holding up the small scanner. Leonard laughed and took it back. He quickly scanned himself so there would be actual results. “Like this…”

***

Leonard finally collapsed into the bed in the room he was staying in while on shore leave, now with his parents. They were due back soon. He heard a knock at the door. Who would that be? His parents wouldn’t knock at their own room…

He pulled himself out of bed and answered the door. “Jim! What are you doing here?”

“I wanted to check up on you,” he said, clapping him on the shoulder and pushing through into the room.

“You too?” Leonard grumbled as he shut the door.

Jim smiled. He put two hands on his shoulders and looked him in the eyes. “Look, about your parents… They contacted me because they were worried.”

“I figured,” he said. He felt himself blushing again, remembering their earlier conversation mentioning Jim.

“I scheduled the surprise for you behind your back. I hope you don’t mind.”

He waved a hand carelessly. “Oh, it’s fine. You worry too much, Jim.”

He sat down on the couch and rubbed his temples. “Everyone worries about me too much. I’m fine.”

To his surprise, he suddenly felt Jim’s hands rubbing his shoulders.

“I don’t know, Bones,” Jim said as he started giving him a shoulder massage. “Your shoulders are very tense.”

“Gee, I wonder what made me so tense,” he teased. “When did you learn how to give a massage?”

Jim just smirked and kept going. Soon Leonard was closing his eyes.

“Mm, right there is good.”

“Here?”

For a few minutes Jim continued in silence, smiling every time Leonard let a satisfied noise escape. After a while he seemed really out of it and finally relaxed. He took the opportunity to kiss him behind the ear. On the neck. On the collarbone.

“Mm,” Leonard said each time. Before he was even fully aware of what was happening, they were both on the couch, kissing and pulling at clothes. This was certainly a surprise, but there was no way he was going to fight it.

Suddenly the door opened and an excited squeal sounded from behind them. Through the fog in Leonard’s brain he knew exactly what happened, but it took a few moments from his body to obey and regretfully pull away from Jim. He turned and faced his parents, his mother looking for elated than ever and his father raising his eyebrows. “I knew it!” How humiliating.

He stood up quickly. He rushed them back out the door as his mother giggled. “Come back later!” he yelled.

“Take your time!” she said gleefully.

He slammed the door shut behind them, then collapsed against the door, breathing hard. He watched as Jim walked toward him. “Where were we?”

“Right here,” Jim said, slipping his hand back under his shirt.

TOS

“Daddy?” Joanna said just as Leonard was turning off the light after telling her a story.

“Yes?”

“Are you lonely up there in space?”

Leonard hesitated, his back still facing her. Was he ready to talk to her about this? He turned to her. He could see her face in the hallway light, but he probably looked like a shadow to her. “Yes. Yes, I am.”

“I’m lonely when you’re in space, too.”

“You?” he came back and sat on the edge of the bed. He put his hand on the blanket on top of her knee.

She nodded. “When I come here and you’re not here, I’m lonely.” She looked at the bookcase, dresser and closet that all once belonged to him in his youth.

“Well, you always know where to find me. Just look out your window at the stars and I’ll be there, thinking about you.”

“It’s not the same,” she said, resting her head against his shoulder again.

“I know,” he said quietly. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry I’m so far away.”

“I sent a letter to Captain Kirk once,” Joanna suddenly admitted. “Asking him to bring you back for good.”

“You did?” Leonard looked concerned in the dark. “How – ?”

“He told me that I’ll always have you in my bones,” she said. Leonard laughed at that one.

“You’ll come back again soon, right?”

“Definitely.”

Maybe.