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lure-of-writing · 8 months ago

Text

His little Sister: I'm sorry

Summary: The mating bond between you and Azriel has been revealed and he isn't sure if any apology will ever make up for the hurt he has cause you.

Word count: 4k

Warnings: none that I know of

Authors note: Guys I just got my nails done so if there is typos it's because I'm not used to typing with daggers on my hands. But anyways that's not what we're here for. Please enjoy and let me know what you think!

Azriel was screwed. Royally screwed. Even as the spymaster of the night court he had no idea how he was going to get out of this one unscathed. First and foremost there was you. You were the mosting important thing in this giant mess that your cousin just caused and making sure you were ok was his first priority. That is once you inevitably get all of the hurt and betrayal out of your system. He could feel your emotions barrelling down the bond and it damn near made him crumple under the weight of your hurt. Next on the list of casualties was Rhysand. And by the look on the high lord's face it was a mixture of pure unfiltered anger and the need to protect his little sister. Azriel can’t blame him, you look like you could either rip him to shreds and bawl your eyes out while doing so.

Rationally Azriel knew that Rhys would never really do anything to hurt him but the other part knew that Rhysand played dirty when it came to his family and it was some sort of unwritten rule that he would go to the end of the world to make sure you were ok. If Rhysand played dirty before he was about to get filthy now. This would not be the first time he stepped toe to toe against a high lord, specifically against Rhys, but this time would without a doubt be different. This time Rhysand would pocket away all of the years of their friendship and in turn he would fight Azriel like a traitor. He, without trying, had broken your heart and betrayed your trust. To Rhysand this was the ultimate act of betrayal.

Only being one hundred years younger than your brother means all three males were also relatively young in the grand scheme of things. Rhysand held your tiny body against his. The three males had taken a break forming training in the mountains to visit you in Velaris. It wasn’t often Rhysand was allowed to leave the camps, much less often for Azriel and Cassian. But with the arrival of a new babe they had been permitted to leave. It became a tradition to visit the ever growing babe once a year. Somewhere in the chaos of training for the Blood Rite you had grown into a teenager. Cassian was sprawled out on one of the couches in the cabin and Azirel had taken his place in the chair that was unofficially deemed as his. There in a seat a little bit bigger than his own but yet still smaller than the couch Cassian claimed you were curled up against your older brother, peacefully sleeping.

Rhysand had always disliked the way things were run in the camps, oftentimes they made his blood boil but something changed in him the day you were born. Rhys knew from a young age that he would be a protector. A protector of his friends, his family, his people and his court. But he never knew that the most precious thing he would come to protect was you. He never wanted in the camps, walking amongst those who would take any opportunity to clip your wings or even kill you without a second thought. Unfortunately there was nothing he could do to stop your visit as your father deemed it necessary.

Silence was light in the room. Occasionally there was a pop or crackle from the fire, the sound of clothes shifting against the couch from Cassian and the light noise of you breathing. With a heavy sigh Rhys rubbed his face causing both males to look at their friend in confusion. “Something on your mind brother?” Cassian's deep voice filled the once quiet room. For a moment nothing was said as Rhysand just looked deep into the fire before once again sighing and rubbing his face before throwing his head back to rest on the couch. “What if I’m not capable of protecting her?” The two males looked at each other in confusion before turning their attention back on their friend. Everyone knew that the power Rhys possessed was quite frankly, insane, to put it simply. “Rhys, I think you're forgetting you are there, bud.” Once more Cassian's voice takes over the room. This time in a gentle laughter. “It’s not that I’m unaware of what I am capable of.” Rhys stops speaking as he looks down at your resting form laying against him. Gently he moves a piece of hair that had fallen in your face. “I know what I can do. What I am willing to do to keep her safe but I will not always be around to protect her and that is what I fear.”

“Being her brother is the greatest honor I have ever been given but what if I fail? What will it cost her? Just her being here possesses a threat to her life. Those males out there would not hesitate to clip her wings or flat out kill her. What happens when I am needed elsewhere and she is in trouble? Who will save her then? I know my mother is training her to fight but I never want her to be put in that position where she has to. Making sure she is safe, happy and loved is all I want for her. I never want her to experience the world we have endured.”

Neither males have a sister but they do have the love of siblings for each other and they know the lengths they would go to for the other males. They may not know what it's like to have a sibling but they do know what it's like to love you. Since the day you were born they have done nothing but love and dote on you. If you tripped and fell and scraped your knees Cassian would scoop you up and cradle you until you stopped crying. Only then would he set you somewhere where he could properly clean the cuts littering your body and then take you for a treat to make you feel better. Azriel would help you with any of the boring assignments your mother would hand out. “I don’t even know what this means!” you would groan out in frustration before dramatically letting your head fall face first into the book. Luckly Az knew you very well. Without looking up from what he was doing he placed his hand palm up in the book and waited for the impact of your head against his hand.

Finally once your head was in his hand, did he finally look up. “You may not understand it right now but eventually you will and you will be grateful your mother made you do this.” Groaning once more you left your head where it was. “Easy for you to say you're like a genius or something.” You grumble while Azriel lifts your head for you. Gently he pats the top of your head. “Maybe if you studied more you could be one too.” A mixture of a frustrated groan and sigh made its way through your lips causing Azriel to chuckle.

It was safe to say that they understood what a light you are in the world. In their world. And each male would do anything to protect it. “You know we would protect her with our lives, right?” Cassian now sat up on the couch. This conversation was important. “We have known her since the day she was born. We have watched her grow and reach each millstone just like you have Rhys. We would never let anything happen to her. If it were my life or hers, I would happily give up mine. I’m sure Az feels the same way.” And Azriel did. “You don’t have to worry about her by yourself. We can share the worry Rhys. You know you can count on us. If anything ever happens to you, we will protect her just as fiercely as you do. You know that right?” And Rhysand did in fact know that but there would always be some part of him that thinks only he will ever be able to do a good enough job at keeping you safe.

Apparently Rhysand was right. Only he would protect you. Azriel had broken his promise and now he would pay. Next on his list of people to deal with was Morrigian. At the moment she was not a priority but eventually would be. First he needed to survive the night.

If Azriel were to go back in time less than a week ago, he would have been more or less avoiding you. After his talk with Rhysand about the more interesting part of your relationship the shadowsinger thought it would be a good idea to give you some space, not wanting it to seem like he was trying to pursue something with you. Obviously that was the exact opposite of what he wanted but he was also keenly aware of your brother's disapproval of any male you chose to date. Azriel was sure he wouldn’t fare better than the others. On the other side Azriel truly had no idea how you would react to you being his mate and that terrified him.

He hadn’t seen you much since the training incident with Cassian. As much as it bothered him to not be able to check on your healing himself he had Cassian right there basically giving me second by second updates. Which he did appreciate but since Cassian knew you were his brother's mate he was being a little over the top. Which is why Azriel was not expecting to see you on the rooftop for the daily morning training session.

Az and his shadows watched from across the room as Cass ushered you back towards the house. That was until you saw him and course corrected to be right in front of him. “You’ve been avoiding me. Why?” The hurt in your voice made him feel like a terrible person but he also couldn’t give you the real answer why. Not right now and definitely not right here. “I haven’t been avoiding you.” He knew he was whispering but he also knew there were more listening ears then just yours, mainly Cassians. Azriel watched as Cassian scooped you up and walked back to where he was herding you, just moments before you veered off on your own.

As the shadowsinger and spymaster of the night court there wasn’t much, if anything, that made him nervous. The piercing stare of your gaze following his every move was definitely unsettling. But his male ego wouldn’t let him slip into that unflinching state of mind that he would usually find himself in when sparring. Now he was keenly aware of each move he was making while in front of you. His need to impress didn’t go unnoticed by his brother. Thankfully Cassian decided to have mercy on his soul and let him get in a few good punches as his repayment for when Cassian did the same to him while in front of Nesta.

The daily sparring session was over sooner and also later then he wanted it to be. One part of him wanted to continue to impress you, even if he wasn’t a hundred percent sure that you were even impressed in the first place. The other part of him just really wants to get the awaiting conversation over with. Azriel headed over the bench where his long forgotten shirt and water bottle had been previously placed. He had barely gotten in one drink of water when you appeared in front of him. “Why have you been avoiding me?” It was the same question that you had previously asked him before being dragged away by Cassian. And yet this time it made him even more nervous then the first time you had asked him. The last thing Azriel ever wanted to do was make you feel like he didn’t want to be around you. Even before the bond he wanted to be around you every chance he could get and you knew that. He needed a reason you would believe. A downfall that came with spending all of his spare time with you is that you were able to tell when he was lying better than anyone else in the inner circle. There was only one thing he could tell you that wasn’t the full truth nor a complete lie. Rhys wasn’t a fan of the relationship, or lack thereof, between the two of us and he needed to step back in respect for Rhysand.

Thankfully the mother was on his side that morning because you believed him.

Opening up his arms in a form of some peace offering he’s quickly wrapped in your arms. Even though hugging anyone who was sweaty was something that he knew drove you crazy you did it anyways and it warmed his heart. But watching you place your chin on top of his chest just about made his heart melt. He prayed that you wouldn’t be able to feel or hear just how fast his heart is beating, and it is not from the training.

Oh how Azriel wished he could go back in time to just a few days ago. Hell he would even go back to when he was avoiding you. Truthfully anything would be better than what was currently unraveling in front of him.

“How long have you known?” Azriel tore his eyes away from Morr to look at you. The look of heartbreak that painted your face was like a suckerpunch to his gut. He took a sharp breath in. You were always stunning in Azriels eyes but looking at you now was like looking like a fallen angel. As much as the poetic beauty was undeniable he also never wanted to see that look on your face again. He would do anything to make you trust him again.

“I-” Azriel didn’t realize just how dry his throat was until he tried speaking. Actually now that he was focused on his body he was pretty sure he felt like he was going to throw up. Swallowing he takes another deep breath. A quick glance to his right reveals Rhysand with a raised eyebrow and barely contained anger. “I’ve known since the war.” Azriel always imagined this moment would be very different. Just the two of you in private. And it would finally feel like a brick being lifted off of his chest.

But watching your reaction to his confession felt like the opposite. He watched as you blew out a heavy breath and grabbed the back of Morrigians chair for support. Looking at the look he watches a tear finally free itself and makes its way to the ground. Just as quickly as the first tear had fallen the rest had also followed suit. He watches as you shake your head and look at your brother for the answer of what you are supposed to do. The dining room had never been as quiet as it was in these waking moments and Azriel despised it. Even if he was the cause of it. “You’ve known for almost a year and you never told me?” The spymaster watched as you fought against the lump in your throat only for your voice to crack on the last word. “Were you ever going to tell me? Or were you just going to let me continue to dream about the love I desired. Let me think I was never going to get the love Rhys and Fey have? You’ve known for months!” Azriel sat unmoving as your betrayal turned to sadness and then anger. You had never raised your voice and yelled at him before but he knew he deserved every ounce of anger you threw at him. “You-you out of all people knew how I felt about mates and yet you held this from me. My mate! I-I-I -oh my god.” Time seemed to slow down in that moment as he watched you grab your chest in pain then collapse to the floor. He felt himself rise. Azriel wasn’t sure why, was it to move to the other side of the table and comfort you? Was it in shock? Fear for your breaking heart? He wasn’t sure. It was like slow motion as Mor swiftly twisted out of her seat and caught your limp body on the way down to the floor. Together the two females sat on the floor. Morrigian had wrapped her arms around your body and held you pressed against her chest as you sobbed.

“Azriel!” That was the commanding voice of a high lord. The force of which Rhysand said his name and allowed his power to wash over him was the only thing capable of pulling his focus off of your crumpled body. Looking back to his right he notes that Rhysand has pushed the chair he was previously sitting in far behind him. It didn’t go unnoticed how Feyre made her way to you with urgency. The primal anger and need to protect his family also didn’t go unnoticed by the shadowsinger. He was about to get his ass beat. If not altogether killed. Rhysand may have been mad at Cassian for hurting you but he did go easy on him, even if it resulted in a few nasty bruises littering his body. Azriel knew for sure this would be nothing like that time. Rhysand had a look of death in his eyes and Azriel was sure death was waiting to greet him.

“Uh oh. Yeah you guys may want to get out of here it's about to get ugly.” Cassian also stood from where he was once seated and began stretching. Noting Feyres' worry Cassian continued “Don’t worry I won’t let them hurt each other too much.” He paused, “Well I won’t let them kill each other.”

Only after everyone except Mor and Cassian had winnowed away his Rhysand lunge at Azriel.

Ever since learning that you were his mate one of his shadows followed you religiously. He never even told them to do that, it was just something they did naturally. His shadows always were ones to keep an eye on you even if you were completely safe.

That's how he found himself in front of the river house. His shadows danced around him in warning of the two females sitting in the living room still awake at this hour. Without looking at a clock Azriel would assume it was around three in the morning. Gently he pushes the hard oak door open only closing it after allowing himself inside the quiet house. Azriel knew he could make his way to your room without either one of the females knowing but he assumed it was better to get everything that could tear him apart over with while he was down.

“I feel bad for her. I know what it's like when the other person knows they're your mate and you're left in the dark. But this is something else. If Mor hadn’t said anything would he?” He could hear the voice of his concerned high lady. “Do we know if she even still has a mate? Rhysand looked like he was going to kill him.” Nestas' voice that usually dripped in sarcasm was dry as bone. Stepping into the room he made his footsteps louder than he would ever step to announce his presence. A sharp gasp was the only noise that Feyre made as she brought her hands to cover her mouth. “Oh my gods” The scraping of the chair against the wooden floor pulls his gaze from the spot on the floor he found particularly interesting to see Feyre making her way over to him. Over her shoulder he could see Nesta taking inventory of the damage Rhysand caused. “Are you ok?” He shrugs off her question but allows her gentle hands to move his head from side to side.

“How is she?” Everybody knew who he was talking about. Feyre led him to the couch ushering him to sit down as Nesta answered “As well as you can expect.” Feyre had stepped out of the room to grab a pain relieving tonic “She just fell asleep a few minutes before you got here” she pushes the vial into his hands “Drink” she insists. “I never meant for it to go like this. For it to get this far without me telling her. I just was waiting for her to feel it herself but then I just kept waiting and waiting and waiting and the next thing I knew I was sitting at that table listening to Mor tell her. I promise I never meant to hurt her. You know that right? You have to believe me.” The constant throbbing throughout his body finally forced him to drink the tonic in hopes it could even touch the pain he was feeling. “I’m sure you never meant for this to happen az. But why didn’t you just tell her. Anyone with eyes could see that she already had feelings for you.’’

“I wanted it to be her choice. I would never force her to accept the bond. All I want is for her to be happy no matter what.” A heavy sigh fell from both females before the peaceful silence filled the room. Nesta was the first to leave in hopes of getting at least an hour of sleep before she needed to be awake for training. With a gentle squeeze of his arm Feyre stands above him “I Believe you Az. But you need to understand how hurt she is currently feeling.” looking up he sees not his high lady or Rhysands mate but a concerned friend. “I know I can feel it through the bond.” Feyre smiles sadly before stopping in the hallway leading to the bedrooms. “Go be with her Az. You both need it.”

The warmth of the fire was the first thing Azriel noticed upon entering your room. Although fae ran warmer than humans you were the rare exception. Unless absorbing heat from the sun or another person you were on average at least ten degrees colder than anyone else. A small smile found its away to his face to see the fire going. His own personal relationship with fire may be nonexistent but for you he would endure it a hundred times over. The next thing he noticed was your sniffling and quiet sobs. In three large strides he was kneeing besides your bed. “Y/n” you name was like a whisper of a prayer in a silent coven meant for worship. He watched as your eyes opened to meet his and listened as a sob racked your body. “I am so sorry baby” Quickly he raised from where he was previously knelt on the floor and climbed into bed with you. The move to place your body on top of his was easy but listening to the silent cries of your heart breaking wasn’t. “I never meant to hurt you I swear.”

Eventually the tears raining upon his chest and was replaced with the gentle breathing of your sleeping form. Azriel knew he should sleep but he couldn’t help but admire every part of you just in case this was the last time he got to hold you like this. That's why he wasn’t startled when Rhysand barged into your room, startling you awake. “I told you to stay away from her. I’m going to kill you.” He promised. Azriel didn’t take his eyes off of your brother as you raised to sit in between his legs. Rhysand could do whatever he wished but Azriel wouldn’t leave without making sure you were ok first. “Rhys don’t. You may be mad at him, but Azriel is my mate.” The bond had never sung in happiness like it did basking in the warmth of your acknowledgement.

Taglist

@kemillyfreitas @lana08 @willowpains @username199945 @tothestarsandwhateverend

@kylaisra @lilah-asteria @nickishadow139 @br0klynbby @blacktreacle22

@amysangel @mp-littlebit @mybestfriendmademe

@olive-main @mariahoedt @tele86 @marina468 @fangirlloza010 @kennedy-brooke

#acotar imagine #acotar x reader #acotar x you #azriel acotar #azriel x reader #azriel fanfic #azriel imagine #azriel shadowsinger #azriel angst #azriel one shot #rhysand x sister!reader

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the-traveling-poet · 1 year ago

Note

hello there!

alright, hc...what do you think about Levi with a partner that has adhd? as in inattentive adhd?

like...very forgetful, can't focus to save their life, careless mistakes that they don't even notice, short attention span, "smart but lazy", impulsive, very emotional and literally just jumping from one topic to another while talking, withdrawing suddenly and this intensely mood swings man, they're the worst (I have adhd, lol).

basically the whole thing...how do you think Levi would handle that?

and thank you, I absolutely love your work🫂❤️

Headcannon no. 11

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ADHD

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A/N: anon I FEEL you. for me it’s disassociation so I’mma add that to the HC list here :)

I hope I did this justice for your preferences!

taglist: @21aurora @deepzombieyouth @braunsbabe

(If you’d like added to the taglist, just DM me :) )

Enjoy~

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At first, he really couldn’t understand what qualified you as a reliable soldier to humanity.

But after working near you; both fresh out of boot camp, and then later outside the walls, he started to understand.

While your attentjon seemed to come and go on matters both huge and small, in the best and the worst of timing, he saw how close of attention you paid to every little detail. Even if it was forgotten for a short time until it became useful to you.

He grew to admire these attributes, slowly but surly growing accustomed to your mannerisms and the charm that came with your accidental inattentiveness. This eventually sparked a friendship, and after some time, feelings.

When he proposed the idea of his growing affections to you after some time to think, he’d have expected your reaction to be simple; either shocked or joyed.

He wasn’t at all expecting your distracted response.

“Well yeah, I knew that. I just figured I’d wait till you said something. But also it’s cause I forgot to tell you that I knew.”

You were refreshing to him, in some way.

He realized he could tell you the same story twice and watch your face light up in amusement if you had forgotten the tale.

Though he might see it as incompetent from others, he appreciated the way you’d sometimes forget to lace a strap on your uniform, or simply became too distracted to finish the job. This always enabled him to fix it for you with the excuse to double check your safety and be nearest to you.

The times your emotions got the better of you, regardless your reaction, helped remind him that it was okay for him to feel things, too. And in this way, he could talk it out with you and vise versa. After some time of this, it drastically reduced his stress.

Whenever you would disassociate or zone out, it gave him the opportunity to really study and admire you; as well as to have a moment’s break from how long you’d been going over the topic at hand. He’d never admit it if you ever zoned back into reality and caught him, but he adored examining your side profile when you’d cut yourself off from a conversation you’d been having. It was endearing, really.

Your occasional mood swings gave him entertainment at times, as well. Not that he would ever laugh at your expense, but watching you go from bouncing off the walls with excitement to kicking your feet through the grass with a scowl always kept him on his toes. Something he really appreciated, as being complacent in any way bothered him.

Your relationship with Levi constantly kept him curious and observant. He was never bored, never forced into a repetitive loop of events. With you, every day had a new adventure.

Whether that adventure was ensuring your saftey and reminding you to maintain your health on a daily basis, or listening to you ramble on over one of your hyper-fixations in the earliest hours of the morning when you decided sleep could wait. And decided for him that he could do the same.

He would always pretend to be disgruntled by it all, but the way he stared into your eyes with such adoration and excitment rimming his irises behind closed doors told you all you needed to know.

You made him worry about things he’s never considered before, opening his mind to new topics and ways of doing things. And he wouldn’t change that for anything.

His fellow veteran associates would catch him with his hand on the small of your back to protectively walk you from one side of the room towards the other, or tying up your hair for you on the field when you’d forgotten a band for yourself.

He was always prepared, but now that he was with you he took many more precautions. And it made him feel useful to you, no matter how big or small his gestures were.

Levi was always an attentive man, but your ADHD now had him conditioned to be even more so.

He saw it as a challenge some days, always watching and guarding your six. But he loved a good challenge, and always rose to the occasion without any prompt.

ADHD and all, Levi’s devotion to you would grow stronger than any attachment he had to anything else. You made his protective side come out, yet softened him all the same with your adorable antics. Through every struggle, he was there to support and help.

You were his favorite challenge; his favorite investment.

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loveysloveclub · 1 year ago

Text

forever and always - luke hughes

in which, it is ally and luke's first and last moments together.

tuesday, 16th of june 2023

"yes, mom. i told you i'm fine." ally grumbled into her phone as her mother gave her a new list of things to worry about. earthquakes, car insurance, expired milk.

the list continued to grow every time she called, and ally had only been living in new york for a month. "mom, i know it's a big city- yes! i have a map! it's called google maps."

if she had been paying attention to the bustling street of new york instead of her mothers concerned voice ringing in her ears, then maybe she would have saw the stranger who was also engrossed in a phone of his own coming straight for her.

but in true ally fashion (as her over bearing mother liked to call it), she hadn't realised until she was on the floor and her phone was being run over by an oncoming truck.

"no, no, no." ally mumbled to herself frantically as she jumped to her feet and ran to retrieve her phone, only for an arm to wrap around her waist and pull her back to the somewhat safety of the sidewalk.

"i'll buy you a new phone, but please, don't kill yourself because i broke it."

ally had completely forgotten about the other half of the collision that had occurred moments beforehand. looking up at the stranger who had saved her life, ally was sure she had met the love of her life.

the unknown man was exactly her type. almost as if he was crafted for her.

"it's not the phone," ally began to tell him, "it's the constant 'i told you so's' i'm about to get from my mother."

a small smile graced the face of the stranger before her as he let out a breath of a laugh.

"i'm sorry about your phone."

ally simply waved him off, "don't be, you honestly were doing me a favour. my mother was about to begin her daily lecture on how to take the subway safely. mind you, she's never stepped foot out of oklahoma."

"still, they're sort of expensive."

ally shrugged her shoulders, a devious smile tugging at her lips, "eh, at least a cute stranger offered to buy me a new one."

and with that, the girl turned on her heel and began walking down the street. "i only said that so you wouldn't dive into oncoming traffic!" the boy yelled after her, but she pretended not to hear him as she continued on her way. "do you really think i'm cute?"

this caused ally to halt in her steps as she turned to face the boy, narrowly missing the people pushing passed her as she shrugged her shoulder, "guess you're gonna have to find out."

janurary 11th, 2024

"i don't understand." ally shook her head as she looked over at her boyfriend, tears streaming down her face.

her and luke's relationship had been in a bit of a rough patch ever since around thankgiving. she had no idea what had caused it, and honestly, neither did he.

they just weren't clicking anymore. they weren't working, and this was obvious to both of them, but luke seemed to be the only one bale to admit it out loud.

hence the situation they were both currently in.

luke had offered up the idea of a break, which ally knew meant to break up. which had led to a remorseful luke and a crying ally standing in the hallway of her two bedroom apartment.

"i'm so sorry, al," luke began, his hands instinctively cupping the girls face and wiping at the tears. the tears which he caused. the tears that would keep him up at night.

ally placed her shaky hands over his, holding them there for a minute as she closed her eyes and revelled in her last moments with him.

she knew it. luke knew it. hell, even jack knew it when luke left their shared apartment earlier that evening.

opening her eyes once more, ally shook her head and pulled away from luke's touch. "i thought you- you said you loved me."

"i do, i do love you. but we both know this isn't working. and until we can figure out why, i don't think we should be together." luke rebutted, almost offended that the girl would even suggest that he wasn't head over heels.

ally sniffled, but nodded her head regardless. she knew there was no avoiding this like she had been the obvious issues in her and luke's relationship over the past couple of weeks.

so, the girl bit her tongue as she watched the boy lean down and give her one final kiss on the cheek before walking out the door.

god, she wished her mother had a lecture about this one.

#luke hughes #luke hughes x reader #new jersey devils #nj devils #nhl #nhl imagine #hockey #lh43

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dulcewrites · 2 years ago

Text

Masterlist

Welcome! You can call me Flower. I am a relatively new writer (fanfic wise). This is my side blog so replies/follows will come from dulcelibra. I write basically anything. Fluff, angst etc. So far the fandoms I’ve written for are: Top Gun Maverick, Outer Range, and House of the Dragon. I am open writing for other fandoms so just let me know if you have any request. My inbox is always open. I try to upload or post regularly, even if it is just posting ideas for feedback. That being said, I would appreciate patience. Also I do have works that are ambiguous readers but as a black woman is important for me to represent that in my writing. Please like, reblog, and follow if you see anything you like 🫶🏽🫶🏽

Ao3

Top Gun Maverick

Good Wife: As their marriage goes through a rough patch, Nia finds her reevaluating her relationship with Bradley, and what she signed up for when she said ‘I Do’. Slight character study based on some lyrics from good wife by Kacey Musgraves (Bradley x oc)

Crush Preview

Outer Range

Despite My Better Judgement: Your eccentric but kind hearted best friend tasks you with the duty of throwing “the best bachelorette party ever” in Wyoming of all places. An unexpected night with a brooding cowboy happens.

New Traditions: As the first holiday season in your new home approaches, Rhett and you start new traditions and make promises

Moodboard*

House of the Dragon

Fool Me Once (multi part - finished): Learning about Aemond’s indiscretions hurts more than you thought it would, and leads you to accepting help from an unlikely source (Aemond x reader)

Finding Common Cause (multi part- on going): A little white lie on Helaena’s part lands both Aemond and Myrah in situation they can’t get out of (Aemond x oc)

Blood in the Water (multi part - on going): Some will say that the deaths of Lady Laena Velaryon and Ser Laenor Velaryon, daughter and son of the Sea Snake and Queen That Never Was, were the first cracks in the long standing alliance between House Velaryon and House Targaryen. But most claim it was sudden union between Ser Vaemond Velaryon's daughter and the King's first born son. (Aegon x oc)

Intrinsically Linked: Love and Pain are two sides of the same coin. Fluid and never ending. Laena and Alicent both know that all too well.

Drowned in Love (multi part - paused): Love in painful and all consuming, and the three of them would not have it any other way. (Aemond x alys x oc)

One Step Forward, Two Steps Back (paused): Sometimes Aegon is sure that the Gods like playing tricks on him. Your reintroduction into his life only proves that further (modern hotd au, Aegon centric).

Acquired Taste (paused): Sometimes the hungry grows too strong. Edith and Aegon know that all too well. (Modern au Aegon x oc)

Unnerved: Being at court is a game is a game, and your favorite player is a certain long haired prince (Aemond x reader)

Fire & Desire: Many sacrifices have been made to get Aegon on the throne. Including ones made by you (Aegon x reader x aemond)

Paparazzi: Loving Aemond is cherry pie (modern au Aemond centric)

Gone… But Not Forgotten (request): Aemond and you always had a great relationship. But as the Dance of the Dragons begins and tensions rise, you find yourself on the outside looking in (Aemond x reader)

Promises and Premonitions (request): Since finding out you’re with child, you’ve been having the strangest nights (Aemond x reader)

For You Always: you always knew Aemond had a soft spot for you, but you always just assumed it was him wanting to look out for his brother’s wife. Soon you find out that his devotion knows no bounds (Aemond x reader)

Oc list

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nellasbookplanet · 2 years ago

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Book recs: great, unique and creative worldbuilding in sci-fi

A note: most of the books on this list are ones I cherish very highly (some are on my all time favorites list!). A few had a lower overall rating for me personally but still stellar worldbuilding and are of what I'd consider good objective quality even if I subjectively didn’t super enjoy them.

For details on the books, continue under the readmore!

Other book rec posts:

Really cool fantasy worldbuilding

Mermaid books

Dark sapphic romances

Vampire books

Feed (Newsflesh series) by Mira Grant

Zombies and news bloggers and presidential elections, oh my! A look at the world post-post zombie apocalypse, when society has gotten back to its feet but the zombie virus is still very much active. Humanity as a whole has been forced to adapt to the ever-present threat. Largely political, character and worldbuilding focused. There is some zombie action, but it’s far from the central focus.

Shades of Grey (Shades of Grey series) by Jasper Fforde

Walking the very thin line of giving you just enough information to follow the plot and grasp the overall idea of the world, but not enough to create info dumps or hand you answers not yet earned, Shades of Grey presents a world in black and white, where your perception of color determines your place in society. Is it fantasy? Scifi? Post apocalypse? Who knows! I sure don’t! Occasionally it hands you a tidbit of information that seems like a remnant of our world and you feel like you're onto something, but then some pages later said tidbit is turned on its head and you're back to square one. It’s delightful.

This Alien Shore (Alien Shores series) by C.S. Friedman

Space opera in which humanity found a way to faster than light travel and began establishing colonies all over the galaxy, only to belatedly realize the method of FTL caused irreversible mutations and disabilities and leaving their nascent colonies to die. Much later, many of the colonies have survived and thrived, and one has found a new way of FTL travel, allowing an interconnected space society to grow. However, Earth is on the hunt for their method and is prepared to do anything to steal it. Aside from cool worldbuilding, This Alien Shore also features some interesting commentary on disability and accommodation. And there are extra-dimensional space dragons!

Ninefox Gambit (Machineries of Empire trilogy) by Yoon Ha Lee

Military space opera where belief and culture shape the laws of reality, causing all kinds of atrocities as empires do everything in their power to force as many people as possible to conform to their way of life to strengthen their technology and weapons. It’s also very queer, with gay, lesbian and trans major characters, albeit little to no romance.

Ancillary Justice (Imperial Radch series) by Ann Leckie

Another space opera, in which sentient spaceships can walk the ground in stolen human bodies, so called ancillaries. One of these ancillaries, the sole survivor after the complete destruction of her ship and crew, is one the hunt for revenge. This series also does very cool things with gender!

The Quantum Thief (Jean le Flambeur series) by Hannu Rajaniemi

Place this one in the category of 'accept that you're gonna be confused as hell and just let the world wash over you'. The singularity has come and gone and humans can now easily upload, download and copy themselves into new bodies, not all of them human and not always willingly. Consciousnesses and time has become something close to currency. Follows a murder mystery on Mars.

Stray (Touchstone trilogy) by Andrea K. Höst

Young Adult. Cassandra accidentally walks through a wormhole and ends up on another planet, where she tries to survive in the abandoned ruins of a long since gone civilization. When rescue finally arrives, she soon finds her troubles are far from over as she gets embroiled in a war between her rescuers and monstrous creatures from dreamlike other dimensions. Mixes scifi elements such as space travel, vr and nanomachinery with fantasy tropes such as psychic powers, monsters, and interdimensional portals.

The Peacekeeper (The Good Lands series) by B.L. Blanchard

Alternate history in which Europe never colonized the Americas. Follow Ojibwe detective Chibenashi as he travels from his small home village to a city of living skyscrapers to solve a murder. While I found the mystery somewhat lacking, the worldbuilding and look at a contemporary North America never touched by European colonization is absolutely aces.

The Prey of Gods by Nicky Drayden

South African-set scifi featuring gods ancient and new, robots, dik-diks, and a gay teen with mind control abilities. An ancient goddess seeks to return to her true power no matter how many humans she has to sacrifice to get there. A little bit all over the place but very creative and fresh.

Leech by Hiron Ennes

I mean, this is probably scifi? Like Shades of Grey it hands you only just enough information to get by, and whether its historical fantasy, an alternate timeline, or futuristic post apocalypse is hard to determine. A sentient hive mind have taken over the entire medical profession to ensure the health of their host species. One of their doctors is sent off to an isolated location where they’re cut off from the rest of the hive mind, only to realize they’re faced with a rivaling parasitic entity.

Children of Time (Children of Time series) by Adrian Tchaikovsky

Millenia and generation spanning scifi. After the collapse of an empire, a planet once part of a project to uplift other species to sentience is left to develop on its own, resulting not in the intelligent monkeys once intended but in sentient giant spiders. Millenia later, what remains of humanity arrives looking for a new home.

Dreamsnake by Vonda N. McIntyre

A classic following a healer as she travels a post apocalyptic Earth with an alien dreamsnake to help people. When her snake dies, she must go on a journey to find a new one. The worldbuilding feels fairly vague, but not in an annoying way but in one that makes the world feel vast and mysterious and lived in. Just like in the real world you won’t get all the answers, but you do get the feeling of the world as a whole being much larger than the character and her quest.

The Outside (The Outside trilogy) by Ada Hoffman

AKA the book the put me in an existenial crisis. Souls are real, and they are used to feed AI gods in this lovecraftian inspired scifi where reality is warped and artifical gods stand against real, unfathomable ones. Autistic scientist Yasira is accused of heresy and, to save her eternal soul, is recruited by post-human cybernetic 'angels' to help hunt down her own former mentor, who is threatening to tear reality itself apart.

The Three-Body Problem (The Three-Body Problem series) Cixin Liu

While I felt the characters could’ve been better developed, this is undeniably a well-written novel featuring an alien race and culture developed on a planet vastly different from ours. Firmly in the realm of hard scifi, this is a realistic, fascinating and slightly terrifying look at how first contact may look.

Space Opera by Catherynne M. Valente

Eurovision in space! If you lose, humanity is doomed! Good luck! The sentient species of the galaxy have chosen to face each other not in war but in a musical contest, and now humanity is invited to partake. The problem? If we lose, our species as a whole will be exterminated. While I found this book as a whole slightly gimmicky, it’s a fun and flashy experience with some wild and creative alien species.

Escaping Exodus (Escaping Exodus series) by Nicky Drayden

Seske is the heir to the leader of a clan living inside a gigantic, spacefaring beast, of which they frequently need to catch a new one to reside in as their presence slowly kills the beast from the inside. While I found the ending rushed with regards to plot and character, the worldbuilding is very fresh and the overall plot of survival and class struggle an interesting one.

The Stars are Legion by Kameron Hurley

More fucked up biological spaceships, this time all women edition! It’s weird, it's gross, there’s So Much Viscera, it has biotech but in the most horrific way imaginable. Had I to categorize it I would call it grimdark military sf. It’s an experience but not necessarily a pleasant one. Features a mass of slowly dying world-ships, and the conflicts arising between them as they struggle to survive. It’s also sapphic but not what I'd call romantic.

Isle of Broken Years by Jane Fletcher

Young spanish noblewoman Catalina thinks she’s done for when the ship she’s traveling on is attacked by pirates and she’s captured. Things gets worse when the entire crew is stranded on an inhospitable island where time works strangely, dangerous monsters terrorize the woods and something alien stops them from leaving. Strong Lost vibes. Lesbian romance. Admittedly quite indulgent but very fun and creative.

Vagabonds by Hao Jingfang

Slow and long and literary, Vagabonds presents a world a hundred years post a war of independence between Earth and Mars, after which two vastly different societies have grown. A close look at the impossibility of a utopia and how different circumstances allow for different cultures to grow, and how the two aren’t always compatible while neither is necessarily better or worse than the other.

Mortal Engines (Mortal Engines quartet) by Philip Reeve

Young Adult. On a barely survivable Earth humanity has taken to living on great wandering cities, hunting each other across the plains for resources. Tom lives in London, but when he intervenes to stop a murder, he falls off the city alongside a strange and hostile girl on the hunt for revenge. Aside from excellent worldbuilding this also features one of my most favorit female characters ever in Hester Shaw. If you’ve seen the movie, forget about it and read the book instead.

Too Like the Lightning (Terra Ignota series) by Ada Palmer

Centuries in the future, humanity has deliberatly engineered society to be as utopian as possible, politically, socially, sexually, religiously. Written in an enlightenment style and featuring questions of human nature and whether it’s possible to change it, and what price we're prepared to pay for peace, this book is simultaneously very heavy and very funny, and written in a very unique style. While still human, the society presented often feels starkly alien.

A Memory Called Empire (Teixcalaan duology) by Arkady Martine

Mahit, ambassador of a small station nation, arrives at the heart of the Teixcalaanli Empire, ready to battle for the continued independence of her people. In her head she carries part of the personality of her predecessor, there to guide her. A look at imperialism and the conflicting feelings of hate, fear and even admiration one can have towards empire. Also features a sapphic romance!

Gideon the Ninth (The Locked Tomb series) by Tamsyn Muir

I mean, you're on tumblr, you probably already know about this one. Trust me when I say it's exactly as good as people claim. There are indeed lesbian necromancers is space (quite a lot of them, actually), but also incredible worldbuilding that keeps growing with every new installment, interesting political commentary, morally complex characters with fucked up dynamics, and well-thought out plot that keeps you guessing until the last.

Railhead (Railhead trilogy) by Philip Reeve

Young Adult. Listen, Philip Reeve is so good at absolutely wild worldbuilding, I nearly included a third series of his on this list (hey go look up Larklight okay!). In a future where humanity travel between the stars using not spaceships but a portal-connected system of sentient trains, a young thief and street urchin is hired to steal something off of the Emperor's train.

Bonus AKA I haven't read these yet but they seem really cool

The Archive Undying by Emma Mieko Candon

More AI gods!

A Big Ship at the Edge of the Universe by Alex White

Magic in space!

The Genesis of Misery by Neon Yang

Angels in space!

#next post will be sapphic recs!#I'm thinking maybe one rec post a week? we'll see #nella talks books #book recs

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rocketyship · 11 months ago

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Hello!! Anyways I noticed that BE has some similarities with the society/government in the novel A Brave New World

Like how they both don’t seem nearly as bad as their usually compared counterparts (classic AM and Ingsoc) and honestly at first seem look like a pretty utopia, but then when you look under the hood or just think about it a bit more you realize “oh shit they’re really fucked up”

They both like genetic engineering/eugenics, progressive (but I’m guessing BE likes traditional stuff more than BNW’s government since she believes in stuff like “men are THE providers of the family”), LOOOVE their robots, are definitely totalitarian (at least in the present with BE).

However BNW hates religions except Fordism while BE loves that stuff. Plus I don’t think BE is super cool with dr-gs and seggs and all that stuff-

BUUUT yeah I think they have some similarities I wanted to point out lol since I think fictional ideologies are cool and I like pointing out stuff (also I’m so sorry if you have no idea what I’m talking about-)

Welp now I have another book for my ever growing list (always down for more recommendations). But I’m quite pleased that BE does come off as something utopian but is actually deeply twisted.

I would definitely describe BE as a “progressive traditionalist” if that makes sense (she is in a queer relationship herself technically). However I wouldn’t outright say she loves religion, more so that she believes that she is the only higher life form capable of guiding and leading humanity, like a guardian angel. It’s very much stuff she has picked and chosen to fit her own agenda.

Generally when it comes to stuff you could consider “sins of the flesh” (lol). BE is a mild hypocrite. As she is very against things like alcohol and drugs, but at the same time has no problem drugging the humans herself if they become too “aggressive” for her liking. She doesn’t have much of a problem with more…ahem… intimate acts. To her it’s just a human primal desire, and as long as they don’t speak of it, she’s chill. She also doesn’t like swearing (obviously).

I really enjoy writing different fictional societies, worlds, and ideologies. And this Love au has been very fun since not only do I have some kind of base to build off of, but also get to play around with Sci-fi ideas and aesthetics. Most of my other works is either extreme high-fantasy (with horror of different varieties).

Anyhow have a random drawing from a different project cause I like posting my art

(This man has AM energy so it’s fine)

#i have no mouth and i must scream #ihnmaims #ihnmaimsloveau #ihnmaims love au #world building #allied master computer #am ihnmaims

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ailurocide · 1 year ago

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Have you mentioned how the sort of nine lives system works in Ailurocide?

I have not!

Within Ailurocide’s narrative, we’re abandoning the nine lives system set up by Warriors, but not abandoning the nine lives idea as a whole. Just remodeling it and making it unique to our story here!

Let’s get a bit of context before actively diving into the whys and whats!

The Tree of Lights (also sometimes known as “the Tree of Souls”, or simply “the Soul Tree”) is, like many other things within Ailurocide, a hybrid! Rather than following the three-point-hybridization of most species, it is split between a weeping willow and a Canadian hemlock. This Tree produces glowing, harmless, and infertile spores that come in striking colors and sport bioluminescent characteristics, though it also bears a type of “fruit” that grow as cones, protected by a hard outer shell of scales that, when peeled back, reveal the tiny, fleshy fruit within.

These fruits are used for two very distinct and separate things:

When kept in its shell and offered the blood of two felfolk, by either cutting into the scales specifically to feed it, or by “watering” it with blood, the fruit and cone will expand and ultimately produce a new-bloom born of the DNA that the fruit was fed.

When ingested, the fruit can cause extreme resilience within a felfolk (or really, any animal that eats it) for several hours, sometimes even up to a whole day.

For the purposes of this post specifically, we’ll focus on their second listed use.

After ingesting this fruit, the individual will be able to walk off what normally would be a life-threatening injury, recover from the brink of death with little issue, and heal from most any immediate physical ailment. The more it is consumed, however, the more unstable a felfolk’s body becomes; they become weaker and far more prone to illness and small injuries such as excessive bleeding and bruising.

So, in order to ensure that no overdosing occurs, the plant is only offered to fairleads - ideally the strongest of their faction. On the cusp of war, the fairlead can ingest it, or if they’ve been suffering from an illness and wish to continue leading their faction, can ingest it then; it’s an incredibly powerful, potent plant. To misuse it not only causes extreme adverse effects on the body, but it also is grounds for banishment or even execution, in some cases.

Due to its immense importance to the Fealty’s way of life, the ability to continue bloodlines non-sexually, as well as the tempting power it holds, the Evergreens have been entrusted with the duty of guarding the Tree and the fruit, to ensure that not just anyone is able to get their paws on it and risk abusing it. The Tree’s protection, as well as the protection of its fruit - either for the purposes of continuing a life or extending one - falls onto the shoulders of the Evergreens, and it is a responsibility that none take lightly.

The max number of times any fairlead has ever ingested this plant was nine. They would always experience a horrifically painful death - with all of their organs failing, one by one, the brain being the last to go - afterwards.

#ailurocide #ask #x-critter2022 #spotty speaks #xenomoggy #warrior cats rewrite #warrior cats au #ailurocide: the evergreens

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mk-wizard · 6 months ago

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Top 10 Ways being a parent made my life better (especially if you're a geek)

I see the recent trend of making parenthood out to be so bad and not fun, so in response to that, here is my list of all the best things about being a parent.

1- It motivated me to (finally) get in shape. - The truth is I let myself go long before I became a mother though after my pregnancy, I reached a boiling point. Once my child was a toddler, I decided enough was enough because I wanted to have to energy to play with him and be healthy enough to watch grow up. I don't want to become a burden to him in his adult life. Also, how expect my son to live a healthy lifestyle, if I don't?

2- It made more aware of the quality of the TV my son AND I are watching. - I have very high standards for what is acceptable for my son to watch, so I fine comb what he is watching and this skill carried over to what I watch. It also helped me handle what I shouldn't be watching with grace. It also helped me reduce how much TV I watch which is a good thing.

3- I now have a buddy to watch cartoons or play video games (that are appropriate for his age) without being judged. - I LOVE cartoons and comics. In fact, it is my calling to write webcomics. However, there is still a huge stigma when it comes to adults watching them. It can also get very lonely to watch the cartoons I really want to see alone, but thanks to my son, I now have someone to watch them with. In fact, on days where it is just to two of us, we do movie nights with crackers and fruit.

4- You learn to find joy is simple things or achievements. - Every milestone and "first" my son experienced made me realize the beauty behind simplicity. In fact, simplicity and wholesomeness can be exciting if you want them to be. Sure, no one ever won a Nobel Prize for learning how to eat with a fork, but seeing my child learn these things brought me so much joy and remind me that small progress and learning something new is always cause for celebration.

5- I learned to be organized and follow a schedule. - I admit I was always kind of organized before I had my son, but after he came into our lives, I became more so. Sure, I'm not perfect and took time for me to get it right, but once I did, I learned to wake up early, follow a schedule and manage my time. Thanks to that, both my work and family life benefited. I'm even able to work on TWO creative projects now thanks to that.

6- It made me appreciate my mother more than ever. - Once I became a mother myself, it made me realize how much work, patience, stress, time and beyond my own mother put into raising my brother, sister and I. It also brought us closer together and we learned to communicate better. Love you, mom.

7- Kids' birthdays are a total blast. - I always loved birthdays, but a kid's birthday is a special kind of fun. The balloons, the cartoon themes, games, hats and the cake with the special design are really great. Yes, they're work, but they're one that brings so much joy with the colourful decorations and such. Moreover, they have come such a long way and are easier to take down.

8- Hugs. - Getting hugged by your child is awesome. Period.

9- The things you love become new and special all over again when sharing them with your child. - I'm not saying your kid will like everything you do, but chances are, they will like most of it especially when it stuff like Star Wars, Transformers and such. When we watched Transformers G1 with our child for the first time, it was really fun because it felt like we were watching it for the first time again with him. The way how he got so excited and awed was contagious.

10- It inspired me to write 101 family friendly comics. - I did mention that I'm a webcomic author. My son never stops inspiring me with the memories we make, the things he does or the way he makes me laugh. Thanks to his active imagination, mine stays fired up. I have so many ideas I am excited to share thanks to him.

Anyway, this is my list. To all the parents, especially the ones who are cartoon and comic fans/authors, how did having kids make your life better?

#parenthood #love #family #cute #kids #i love my son #i love my kid #geek culture #happy family

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staywhore · 2 years ago

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he was supposed to be mine

she's mine part one

bangchan x reader

word count: 1091

genre: dark romance babes

warnings: just blood and like gore warnings for this first part. its kinda dark and im sorry but not sorry.

an: hey babes! so this is the start of a new series! this will be kinda dark and ofc smutty hehe. Please, please, please, no hate to Felix! I absolutely love him and he was just the first member I thought about using yeah so please don't think I hate him, I'm just good at writing about a murder I guess ://// hey also please if you like this write a comment if you'd think I should take this ff and turn it into a fully fleshed out book! I really like this idea and might turn it into a book. It's my dream to be an author and writing fan fiction has really helped me to gain confidence in my writing! okay well, enjoy hoes ill have the second and possibly third chapter out tonight!

tag list: @hanniegoo @hanjisbeloved @spiderrenjunfics

series homepage / part one

He’s the one.

It’s always been him.

It was only ever him.

But, he’s no longer here.

The only thing left of him is his flesh blown to chunks all around me.

His blood pools under my knees, causing my white dress to fuse to my skin.

The dress every girl dreams of.

The emotions bubble underneath my skin like a fire raging.

I lift my head from the man I was planning to spend the rest of my life with scanning the entirety of the chapel.

I’m the only one left who hasn’t been reduced to a soulless sack of red meat.

My hands vibrating out of rage cradle Felix’s slack face, his eyes still open but no longer are they filled with life. They stare emptily back into my own. The tears fall before I can stop them. Our faces are now wet with my tears as footsteps echo throughout the hollow church. I can’t bring myself to realize the danger that I’m in. As the echoing grows louder, I’m still locked in place. Utter and complete sadness keeps me from wanting to run from the threat no doubt coming back to finish the job.

I want to die.

I only wanted to live for Felix.

He was my light.

Now, that light has been snuffed out.

It’s not until the steps fault and the heat from a body nearly burns me that I finally turn to face the reasoning for my pain. A mangled sob lodges itself in my throat as I wipe the tears from my blurry vision and he comes into view.

Evil spills from every angle of his hard body. He’s covered head to toe in black. His features are dark as his eyes scan my body from the bottom up, pausing slightly at the way my hands grip my lost love’s lax face, continuing up to stop at my face. My pristinely finished makeup is no doubt washed away and mixed with my tears. I look at how his eyes soften as he takes me in fully. He takes a cautious step toward me but stops when I flinch, gathering as much of my fiances bloodied body as I can into my lap.

They can’t take him.

He was supposed to be mine.

I cringe slightly as I feel more of his warm blood soaking through my dress, leeching onto my clammy skin. I somehow manage to hold his back to my chest. His head lulls hitting my shoulder with its full weight. I try to support him by wrapping my arms around his middle, but I realize there’s not much of his middle left. He has a big hole in the center of his chest and one lower. I look around us and see organs that should be inside him.

No, no, no.

This isn’t right.

That should all be inside of his body.

I look where my arms are resting, and notice where some of his innards are falling out because of my hold. I rush of anxiety runs throughout my body and I’m frantically trying to push everything back inside of him. More tears spill and this time guttered sobs escape with them. My hands are slick with his life force, my once pale skin now is a stained red. I raise my hands from their useless task as more heady emotions surge through my nervous system. Turning my palms towards the floor, a dull sparkle from my engagement ring steals my attention. The soft glow of warm light from a mixture of candles and yellow light catches at the different angles of the 4-carat emerald-cut diamond ring. I try to recall the night he proposed but all I can see when I close my eyes are his lifeless eyes and how his body weighs me down.

“Y/n.” My eyes flutter open when the man calls out to me. He is now kneeling beside Felix and me. His eyes are still soft, I almost think I see a dusting of emotion brimming but his expression changes quickly, shielding me from what he’s feeling.

“It’s time to let him go.” He reaches out to take Felix from me but I hiss at his attempt. Keeping his hand out he watches me carefully, “Y/n this isn’t him anymore and you know that.” Felix’s body has slumped down so his head is back in my lap. His dull eyes are still open and looking up at me. I choke out a cry as another way of reality sets in that he’s no longer with me.

He left me alone once again.

He promised to always be by my side.

With an uneven breath, I reach a hand out to his face. Tracing his features for a final time, desperate to commit the feel of his skin to my memory. My fingers, now sticky with his blood, glide over his eyelids shutting them. I press a kiss on each of them and then to his lips. The coldness of his skin leaves a chill deep in my bones and sends a pang of sadness directly to my heart. I lean back and face the man before me. His face is still dark with an emotion I can’t decipher but he still has the warm glow of life coursing through him and when I look back at the man laying dead on top of me I finally release my weak grip on the body of the man I once loved and extend my hand to the still living one beside me.

He ignores my hand and wraps one underneath my shoulder causing me to hug his neck as his other arm snakes under my knees. Felix’s body rolls onto the ground, leaving him in an unnatural position. I force myself to look away from the body and look up at my… rescuer. Surely he must be. If he was here to kill me he wouldn’t have bothered to remove me from the murderous scene. The stench of blood and death floods my senses and it causes me to gag. It overwhelms me and the adrenaline leaves my system, taking its toll on my body.

So tired I let it consume me.

I let the darkness cloud the pain that’s wrapping its claws around my heart and soul.

Before it completely takes control I feel the man hold me closer to his hard body, his grip tightening in a protective way that causes a microscopic amount of pain to lift from my soul.

#bangchan fanfic #skz #skz smut #stray kids smut #bang chan #bang chan x reader #staywhore

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doobnnoob-tf2 · 2 years ago

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hey!! i just recently found your blog, and i really love it! the way your write the mercs is so interesting, and i'm def gonna be coming back to read your fics when i have the chance 👀 it's also so cute that you name your anons?? it creates a sense of community in a way that's really fun <3

that's all i really wanted to say, but if you're up for it, i'm curious to know how you think each of the mercs having to cook for the rest of the team would go? like, if they were on a sort of "so-and-so makes dinner today" calendar instead of just fending for themselves? who would put the most effort in, who actually enjoys it, who would cause a fire/hurt themselves, who would be banned from cooking? do any of them ever share recipes from their youth/cultural recipes, or is it just kinda whatever? chdkaksnfk sorry for such a complicated question about food, i just really enjoy cooking for friends/family and would love to see how you think the mercs would take to it <3 - 🍜

(i'd like to be called soup if i may, unless you have another name in mind! for those warm cozy vibes, and also bc my first ask is food-related cksbskdnfk)

you may absolutely be called Soup!

to start: I personally headcanon that it’s more uncommon that they all fend for themselves. in the beginning when everyone was still new to each other and figuring things out they would’ve left everyone to their own devices. but one thing led to another and dinner became a part of the chore list, with whoever was up to it lending a hand to whoever’s night it is to cook. so recipes are shared constantly between all of them! now onto the list..

Scout: he’s never scheduled to make dinner, but that’s because he’ll sometimes make breakfast. and he can make some killer breakfast foods. he helped his Ma a lot growing up because he was the only one who didn’t find helping make breakfast in the morning a chore. he usually only takes on making breakfast when he’s feeling homesick

Soldier: credit where credit’s due, he’s actually pretty good at grilling / smoking foods. he’s the reason why they even got a smoker in the first place, and no one’s come to regret that after he made an entire meal out of it one summer

Pyro: if they’re cooking, then it’s gonna be spicy. they love spicy foods and will do everything they can to crank up the heat. it was unexpected at first, they weren’t thinking and all but two of their teammates (Engineer and Sniper) were doing whatever they could to kill the heat. after everyone laughed it off, Pyro dialed it down for future dinners and started making a side dish that would help kill it as well for those who need it

Demoman: he goes all out when he cooks. his dinners usually require the most hands to help out since there’s a lot to it, so it’s not uncommon to see half the base in the kitchen, having beers and helping cook. it almost becomes a party on those nights! he likes to gather ideas from everyone and experiment a lot when cooking to try and somehow make a little bit of everything for everyone

Heavy: he grew up helping his Mama cook, and while they usually cooked bear meat he’s found substitutes that work just as well. he makes a lot of comfort foods and loves having someone help him since cooking with someone else is what he’s used to. he’s always much more talkative when he’s cooking, and will happily explain to whoever is helping what he’s doing and why

Engineer: he’d cook every night if he could, he finds it to be one of the most relaxing things he can do after a long day. and he loves seeing people enjoy his cooking. he’ll go all out on his nights, and everyone knows they’ll be in a food coma the moment they get to their rooms. he’ll let whoever wants to help join in, he loves sharing recipes and having the others taste and give suggestions on how to make it even better

Medic: he’s the only one who is banned from cooking. he’s just no good in the kitchen. he knows how to cook one thing and that is it. beyond that, there’s a “No Medics Allowed” sign on the kitchen door

Sniper: more often than not, he’s never scheduled to cook dinner. the reason being he almost always helps out with cooking the meats for everyone. it is VERY rare for him to have the dinner chore scheduled to him, and if it is then it’s because he volunteered after discovering a recipe he really wants to try

Spy: he’s a pescatarian, so everyone knows when it’s his night to cook they better be in the mood for fish or else they’re on their own. despite this he always makes an effort to try a bite of everyone else’s dishes on their dinner nights, but his night, his rules. no one ever complains, he is an incredible cook and the base genuinely gets hyped when it’s his turn. he will choose who helps him that night, and it’s not a request - they WILL help him and no one else is allowed

also I got your other ask and I really, really appreciate it. things are still hit or miss some days, but I think they’re finally gonna get better. I’m starting to do more things to take care of me and my mental health first instead of trying to put people who’ve hurt me first. so it was rather nice I’d get to answer a cozy lil headcanon ask like this right now!

#tf2 #team fortress 2 #tf2 headcanons #tf2 scout #tf2 soldier #tf2 pyro #tf2 demoman #tf2 heavy #tf2 engineer #tf2 medic #tf2 sniper #tf2 spy #sharing one braincell #//Soup Anon

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hdchaeri · 2 years ago

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ever since she moved to seoul, chaeri has been fortunate enough to meet people from all walks of life — colorful, dazzling personalities that have shown her that she isn’t alone in all of her eccentricities ;; those she believes she’d’ve never gotten to know back home in jeju city. back then, her world felt terribly small. all she really knew was her family, & as her father was rather protective of her, he didn’t let her out much, causing her to feel like rapunzel :: stuck in a tower higher than a majestically tall mountain’s peak, forced to only witness everything from afar instead of experiencing things for herself. chaemin, her brother, was allowed more freedoms, & she always found it frustrating that their dad seemed more willing to let him spread his wings & fly, but kept her from the same exploration. however, it was also thanks to her sibling that she was able to relocate to a new place, & after doing so, she’s been blessed with friendships that she’s never had — those that she holds near & dear to heart — & amongst the list of individuals she’s become close to, sebastian choi sits pretty at the very top ;; his name outlined in hearts, & stars, & flowers, & whatever else she could adorn it with to prove that, of everyone, he’s extra special to her.

as she’s about to go through yet another massive change in her life, she’s aware that her new schedule will cut into the time that she can spend with him, & so before she sets out on her next adventure, she desperately wanted to have another night with him — one where they could just be themselves, indulge in cosmetics, & bond before she jet-sets to spain for début prep. it hasn’t fully hit her yet, so she’s enjoying the blissful ignorance she feels while it lasts ;; listening to each word that flows from sebastian’s mouth with intrigue. her eyes grow wide at his idea, & she nods her head excitedly, marveled by the items that he brought along for them to play with. he always has the best stuff, she’s convinced herself of that, & she scoots closer to him to get a better look at his collection ;; delicately cozying up to him in the process.

❝ you know i always love it whenever you look like a woodland nymph, ❞ she laughs, offering a grin. ❝ you descend from the trees to come hangout with us earthlings ;; bringing the party with you. ❞ she squeezes onto his arm adoringly, hoping that the physical affection is alright with him. ❝ i think your plan sounds incredible. giving each other makeovers ? sounds like a perfect night to me ! ❞ with that, she lifts herself off of him & beams, loving everything that he has to say. ❝ sounds cute, but do you think it’ll be too short on me ? i am taller than you, you know... ❞ chaeri half-teases, giggling. ❝ that’s the one huge downside of having such long legs. whenever i try to wear mini skirts, or skirts clearly made for more petite people, it’s... a disaster. if i was back home, my dad would murder me if i stepped out in something risqué. ❞

straightening her posture, she combs her fingers through her hair ;; retrieving a hair-tie from her handbag so she can throw her locks into a quick ponytail. ❝ do you want to doll me up first, or would you rather i prettify you to start us off ? ❞

'cottagecore is kind of a vibe'

— of love and self-care @hdchaeri

sebastian liked to think that god certainly blessed him for being able to have a friend like chaeri in his life. that is if there ever really was a god in the first place- but really, there had to have been some sort of divine intervention for such a good thing to had happened and been bestowed upon him. maybe he just had a good stroke of luck, and was able to meet lovely people. he had the tendency to overthink and be a tad bit overdramatic- but he was glad that she had entered his life, and he was able to form a friendship with her. he liked to think that they were two peas in a pod, eccentric, but also filled with passion for the things that made them happy, they had a lot in common which maybe seemed odd to those who didn’t know them well enough.

this r&r was very much needed though. they had a knack and passion for similar things such as fashion and make up, and it was rare to meet someone who was cut from the same cloth. twin flames if you will. chaeri was onto big and wild things and before she got busy, they had decided to hang out, one last girls' night if you will, and sebastian was excited.

"what if we went full mermaid slash fairy core." he asked softly under the dim lights of the fairy lights he had purchased and wrestled onto his walls, it illuminated the room they share, making the both of them metamorphosis and bloom into different colors, flowers of sorts. the blond haired male turned to chaeri, his smile warm as he reached out for his little bag filled with nail polish and make up, the most sparkly kinds for the both of them. he even made sure to bring his special sailor moon collab as well just to give off strong independent women vibes.

this was very much needed. he wouldn't say he was stressed to the point of breaking, but he couldn't remember the last time he sat down and got to do his skin care as part of self-care and not something that was part of training and looking good for others, but this was for them, and for them to relax and have fun, "we can do each other's make up if you like? i know you said you wanted to dress me up one time." he offered softly with a raised eyebrow, lips quirking upwards to lightly tug on a strand of her hair, teasing gently, "i'll return the favor. i think you'd look really good with this one skirt i have, it's pink with frills and butterflies at the hem. it flairs up when you twirl and kind of dances in the air like you're some kind of wood fae."

#( ♡ ) ——— 𝒇𝒆𝒂𝒕. sebby.#/ tysm for your patience! ♡

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ukiyokki · 4 years ago

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mars reads too much dreamnotfound fanfiction for their own good

a dreamnotfound fanfic recommendation list by your resident dumbass (me)

this took way to fucking long... i’m tired

below is a (very extensive) list dedicated to all my favorite dnf fics, ranging from quick one shots to 100k+ word monstrosities that devour the storage on my computer, forever incomplete masterpieces to ongoing works of art, you get the idea. i provided links for each fic/series for your reading pleasure. there will be no smutty/nsfw fics on this list, that’s just not my vibe lmao. this list goes in no particular order, and i’ll update it from time to time when i feel like it. now, without further ado, let us begin.

Heat Waves (complete) by tbhyourelame

(wtf else did you expect, looking at a dnf rec list?) amazingly well written, and while it’s not my favorite dnf fic it’s damn near close. in the midst of a brutal heatwave, a suffering dream comes to terms with the fact that he is desperately in love with his best friend. everything i could say about this fic has already been said by nearly everyone who’s read it, so if you haven’t yet caved into the hype, just go for it. you won’t be disappointed.

Gonna be around (completed) by georgescatcafe

(mc irl) my favorite dnf oneshot to date. just read it, i don’t wanna spoil for you :)

Inferno in the Sky (ongoing)by zairielon

(star wars au) an ongoing star wars au currently clocking in at almost 200k words. need I say more? everything about it absolutely slaps, each chapter is amazingly written, and it’s just good. also, can we just appreciate dream and tubbos dynamic in here? 10/10, amazing, must protecc. oh right, a summary: george, an exiled padawan turned engineer, must return to the jedi temple after attacks on it from an unknown assailant threaten the safety of himself and the other jedi.

Like Magic (ongoing) by KangarooKen, NotGra55 (Gra55)

(harry potter au) the unofficial official dnf harry potter au. we watch the young unlikely wizard pair grow up together throughout their years at hogwarts as they battle good old fashioned wizard racism. beautifully written, incredibly fun and suspenseful, and just an overall blast and a half.

GeorgeNotFound, Son of Poseidon, and the League of Minor Gods (ongoing) by Clichewho_69, Cygnvs, Trash_Kinggg

(percy jackson au) percy jackson au? check. “road trip” (technically quest but u get what i mean)? check. enemies to friends to lovers? check. this fic follows the plot of the lightning theif (albeit loosely), but everything is explained enough where you don’t have to read percy jackson to understand what’s going on. basically after moving to the usa, george gets taken to camp halfblood where he learns that a) gods exist. b) he’s the son of poseidon and c) he needs to prove that he didn’t steal zeus’s master bolt.

Protected (completed) by aenqua

(royalty/camelot au) my favorite piece of dnf media of all time. dubbed the official dnf camelot au, where dream is the heir to the throne and george is a servants son with a secret that couldp get him killed. these childhood friends grow up together and learn trust, love, and acceptance. (that summary did not justice to the masterpiece that is this fic) here’s the directors cut

The Hunter (completed) by HederEgo

(mc irl) a choose your own adventure fic with 13 different endings, where dream the hunter must kill george and stop him from beater the ender dragon. enough said.

The official dream team cowboy AU (series)(ongoing) by antsu_in_my_pantsu

(cowboy au) cowboys and outlaws horses and shit. and the big gay. it’s a cowboy au, what else did you expect? fucking yee haw (all seriousness this is a great read, i loved it so so so so much and i can’t wait for the final chapter to release).

This is a Drista moment, let's just accept it (completed) by Qekyo

dnf fic from drista pov. considering its unique perspective, it’s perfectly done. beautifully showcases a sibling relationship through drista and her memories/moments with dream, and it just works, y’a know? also drista supremacy.

Dear Dream (completed) by Qekyo

(wwii au) i don’t cry when watching/reading anything sad. translation: i’m a heartless bitch. however, this fic is the only exception. it caused me to cry so hard my mom walked in my room and asked if i was ok. ‘nuff said.

TECHNOlogical Wingman (completed) by Closeted_Bookworm

techno is the autocorrect ai on dreams phone, and he gains sentience. interesting concept, and the author fucking nailed it. great fic.

It Was Only a Fic (ongoing) by imagineitdear

dream starts reading a dnf fanfic (we’ve all been there buddy).

Teacher’s Pet (ongoing) by niyuha

(teacher au) in which dream is a high school english teacher and george is the new comp sci teacher in room 297.

Saltwater Secrets (ongoing) by earlgay_milktea

(mermaid/high school au) a great example of the shear amount of variety in fics this fandom has to offer. when i started reading dnf fics i would have never thought i’d find one about a mermaid george hopelessly crushing on his human friend, who happens to be his schools star swimmer. yet here i am, and i am far from disappointed.

Smash My Heart (incomplete) by dontrollthedice

george and sapnap are commentators for duper smash brothers tournaments, and george develops a crush on an up and coming smash streamer named dream.

roleplaying in the dark is harder than it seems (completed) by Alienu

laser tag. 10/10

solar system (completed) by quartzfia

(mc irl) george vists dream in pandora’s vault.

Ramblings of a Lunatic (completed) by jungkooksfic

ahh communicating through a notebook left on a shelf in a bookstore- what a perfect way to start a relationship.

Paint me like your French Girls (It's Charcoal, Actually) (completed) by Turtle_ier

(artist au) george is an art student, and dream is a model.

00:00:00 (completed) by isleofdreams

(soulmate au) 00:00:00 is the moment you meet your soulmate, as indicated but the clock ticking down on your wrist until the moment you meet. i’m not a fan of soulmate aus; this fic is the exception.

Blue Skies Smilin' At Me (completed) by kivy

(artist au) i don’t usually cry while reading stuff, but this brought me damn near close. george is a painting conservator and chats it is with the ghost of the artist if the painting he is working on. they fall in a love.

Current Location (incomplete) by hendollana

(influencer au) george simps for a hot american instagram model. who knew he’d actually follow back?

The Withering (series) (series ongoing, 1 work completed) by App1e_Juice

(mc irl) lore and world building and fight scenes and everything i crave. what’s not to love? something starts making the plants and crops around dreams village wither, and must team up with new friends to find the cause of the mysterious disease plaguing the land.

Minecraft, But You Can't Leave (complete) by facadecake

(mc irl) dream and george are sucked into their own private minecraft world together and must beat the game to escape.

Free The Game, Beat the End (incomplete) by goatgoatwasfound

(mc irl) a glitch in minecraft causes thousands of players from around the world to be trapped inside minecraft, with only one way of escape- beating the ender dragon. first dnf fic i ever read, and it’s still 10/10 for me.

Why don't you come a little closer? (completed) by lifeofandoms

george gets stood up by a date, and Dream pretends he’s the date to save george from the embarrassment. simply adorable.

lightning bug (completed) by saintachesP

(band au) while on tour, dream realizes his feeling for george.

Hold me closer (completed) by Treesofmyheart

(mc irl/dsmp) i just,, really like this trope.

Dizzy on caffeine (completed) by GleamingGreenGoggles

(coffee shop au) best dnf coffeeshop au i’ve read. periodt.

living a life of crime isn’t always easy (series) (completed) by itisjosh

(mafia/assassin au) stockholm syndrome except it’s not weird.

Inhibitions Make Interesting Situations (completed) by Ship_On_The_Sea

i pissed myself laughing. it’s just a dream and george being hilariously dense, flustered idiots. serotonin central.

thy eternal summer shall not fade (completed) by gracequills

(high school au) that moment when you recite shakespeare to your crush in your ap lit class instead of confessing (hate it when that happens).

All is Fair in love and Football (ongoing) by graciegirl2001

(college au) #1 favorite college au. in which george is a cheerleader, and dream is the football teams rising star player. this one gets extra points because of the amazing karlnap moments sprinkled throughout. *chefs kisses air*

online love (completed) by andbutso

(high school au) online classes go zoooooooom

Can’t help falling (completed) by isleofdreams

dream re-learns the guitar to sing to george on his birthday. beautiful. fluffy. amazing

dance in the rain and my arms (completed) by lazy_kitkat

george is a rain god, and dream is a wind god

Weather Boy (completed) by DaintyDiizzle

wouldn't you like to know, weather boy? (where dream can control the rain)

The color orange (completed) by anon

(mc irl) dream describes the colors of a sunset

Family Mode (completed)by Strawberry_flavoured_tears

they’re dads :,)

Breathing Room (incomplete) by papercranes

(band an) an amazing band au. the mad lad author wrote original songs for each chapter. above and beyond, mad props :). unfortunately, it’s incomplete

Piece of Clay (completed) by carbonbrine

(artist au) george is a sculptor and his sculpture comes to life- but oh no he’s hot.

Try (completed) by Not4typicalwriter

(royalty au) george must choose a suitor, but none of them are up to dream, his head knights, standards. or dream is hella jelly. also protective dream is perfect

When the Roses Bloom (completed) by HederEgo

(royalty au) close second for my favorite fic. go to royalty au for a quick serotonin bost. it’s all fluff and flowers and crushes, and i love it. criminally underrated.

Heavenstruck (ongoing) by dontrollthedice

george is dreams guardian angel, and dream want to find out more about him and his past life. bittersweet :,)

Bang and Burn (completed) by App1e_Juice

(spy au) george accidentally falls for target number 1 on sapnap’s secret agency’s hit list. this ones great, i love me a spy au :)

Can I get a uhh… (completed) by lemonskies

dream keeps pulling up to the drive through mcdonald’s that george works at drunk.

Pretty Stranger (completed) by anon

when looking for dream in the terminal, george sees a cute guy and decides to flirt.

Take my Hand (completed) by latinbias

(royalty au) another royalty au? poggers. surprise twists? double poggers. love this a lot.

seconds, minutes, hours, lifetimes (complete) by meridies

ROAD TRIP ROAD TRIP ROAD TRIP ROAD TRIP *inhales to compose herself* roadtrip au. unrequited love, ignored feelings, longing, pining, you know the drill. absolutely love this one, its the best roadtrip au i have ever read, in any fandom. (maybe cause i identify with it a little too much, but thats not important. whats important is that you read this fic. right now. im waiting).

Message redacted (complete) by justyouraverageloser

(text fic) dream asks for a girls number and realises hes been given the wrong number. however, an unexpected relationship starts to form between him and the stranger on the other end of the line.

the waves (completed) by anon

(mc irl) this fic was written by the same anon who wrote the color orange, which is up there on my fav dnf oneshot list. dream and george know they have a higher purpose. they don’t know where they came from, or why they are seemingly the only humans in the world, or how they feel about eachother, or even where the skeletons come from, but they are sure of one thing: they have to beat a dragon.

The Dream Doll (completed) by PeppDream (Pep_Pizza)

(voodoo i guess) i’m a real big fan of fics with really out there or unique concepts, so naturally this one makes the cut! i really liked it, it’s really sweet and made me think a lot about what matters to me in the world. george finds a strange doll in an antique shop, and would really like to just stuff it in a drawer and forget about it. sadly (?), the doll has other plans.

last updated February 6th, 2021

#dnf #dreamnotfound #dream not found #dreamnotfound fic #dreamnotfound fanfic #dreamnotfound fanfiction #dnf fic #dnf fanfic #dnf fanfiction #dnf fic rec #dreamnotfound fanfiction recommendations #dreamwastaken #georgenotfound #i’m ok i swear #i read too much fanfiction #i should probably go to bed

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minsyal · 4 years ago

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The Fugitive (Finding Home), Pt. 1

Karl Heisenberg x Reader

Warnings: strong language, Resident Evil-esque violence and descriptions of gore, and dark/sexual themes

Summary: A once-in-a-lifetime trip turned dark. You're quickly exposed to the sinister and mysterious world of a cursed village under the control of dark leaders. How long will you last and will you ever return home in one piece?

Backpacking through Eastern Europe was not a top priority on your “to do” list. In fact, it was quite the opposite. Being one to preplan everything, you were completely caught off guard when your roommate sprung the idea of the trip out of the blue. You roommate, Jezebel Haine, was your first and only roommate from college onward. All legs, she was one of the stars of the track team but was most certainly not one of the brightest shining ones. She was considerably dim-witted, fanatical, and had a booming over-the-top personality that scared every potential boyfriend who had the disservice of meeting her. There were times, though, that she was rather endearing. Her childlike sense of self and emotional drivers consistently put her at a crossroads between what everyone else was doing and what she should be doing; she was, and always will be, a follower.

After four years of becoming “the bestest of friends,” you had a hard time imagining such a hard shift either into another roommate or living alone. Plus, her parents funded most everything she did and, in turn, funded the apartment the two of you shared.

“It’s an amazing opportunity!” She insisted, waving her hands in a simple manner as she rose from the condensed cushion of the leather-clad couch. “Think about it.” Gathering your hands in hers like a 20’s actress who had just met the man of her dreams, she pulled the bundle to her chest. “We frolic through the European countryside, it’s golden hour. My skin looks absolutely gorgeous… yours too, of course. The sun is just about to set, but alas!” She let out a dramatic gasp, removing one of her hands to cover her mouth. “It’s growing dark out!”

“That’s what happens when the sun sets.” You noted, causing her to drop the act for a moment only to immediately go back into character.

“We hear the crunching of leaves and twigs all around us as if something…” she drew close and lowered her voice to a whisper, “sinister is coming. Out of no where we’re ambushed! By what, I’m not sure. Then,” her eyes became glassy as she lay a delicate hand to her forehead, “two absolute studs… and I’m talking big bulging muscles, gorgeous trendy hair, captivating eyes… really everything a simple girl could ask for… seemingly drop from the sky! We’re saved!” She throws your hands into the air as if they’d fall like confetti. Drawing both her arms in, she sways back and forth in a waltz of one. “We’d be married by the next day! Hell, maybe we’d even end up as princesses.”

Oh, how utterly wrong she was.

“I told you this was a stupid idea.” You groaned, haughtily holding your chin up while feeling your spirits low. A few miles back, on an asphalt road that quickly turned to dirt, sat the dingy red rental truck with a blown out engine and a deflating tire. With no cell service and the last town being over 100 miles back, your only choice was to walk.

“Don’t blame me!” Jezebel stopped walking, feet falling flat to the ground as she stomped her foot in a childish manner. “I,” her lip quivered as all the anger held in her body dissipated, “I just wanted to have a fun time with you.” Big tears flowed from her eyes quickly after finishing her proclamation, leaving smearing black lines down her face from the eyeliner she insisted was necessary in the Romanian countryside. God, if her parents weren’t funding this trip, you’d throw a fit for your money back.

“Jess, just,” reaching backward, you fished a rag from your backpack, “don’t cry. That’s not going to make this better.” Sniffling, she accepted the rag and wiped her eyes, further smearing black all over her face. You couldn’t help but feel a shred of sympathy for her. “Let’s just keep going. No use in wasting daylight. I really don’t want to get caught out here in the dark.”

“Where are we supposed to go, then?”

“I’m sure the next town will have some sort of inn or hotel. At the very least, they’ll have directions to the nearest city.”

After another five miles of walking, the sun was beginning to set and no gorgeous studs were waiting to save you. The blazing yellow ball inched slowly beyond the horizon. Its warming rays that had kept the snow from freezing the two of you in the day crept down below the snow peaked mountains that were nestled in the distance. Shadows began dancing between the trees, sending the forest into a theater of silent performers. The dirt road that was once large enough for two cars was now only a walking path so slim that Jezebel had to follow on your heels. Every now and again you were reeled back by the piece of rope that she had attached to your backpack that was firmly gripped in her hand. She claimed it made her feel safer.

“You think those two hunks are going to come save us now?” You joked, attempting to make light of this dark situation.

“I wish.” She huffed, frustration evading her voice as exhaustion took center stage.

Flickering light caught your eye. Hues of yellow and red mingled together in the distance, the outlines of rooftops and smoke-filled chimneys littered the ground below. “I think that’s a village.”

Another mile of downhill travel was all it took to reach the place where the once distant flickering of torches and lanterns grew into the quiet streets of a cluttered settlement. There was no clear indication of movement once you stepped foot in the village; the only evidence of any life came in the form of fresh boot prints, livestock, and the ever-blazing lanterns. Jezebel was all to happy to release your makeshift leash from her fingers, trotting mindlessly by to examine the street corners and homes. Your eyes continued wandering up the rooftops, finally landing upon the eerie looming castle situated on the mountainside above.

From around the bend, you heard Jezebel screech.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” You threw caution to the wind, quickly rounding the corner to scold her like a parent would to a misbehaving child. “You don’t know if these people are violent or not. We can’t just go parading ourselves into the town center.”

“I think they’re violent.” She mustered the shaky words. Her hands covered her eyes and the majority of her face as she backed away from whatever had caused her distress.

“What?” The unpleasant squelch of snow beneath your feet caused your attention to draw downward. Dark snow surrounded your boot, an unnatural red hue stained the pure white. Gaze moving upward, your chest restricted feeling as if it had crushed inward on itself. The putrid smell finally fell upon your nostrils as you backed away from the scene. Severed animal heads hung lazily above you, their tongues flopping from their opened mouths.

“I want to go home.” Jezebel sobbed, rasping her cries into her cupped hand. Shaking her head as if to knock this moment from her brain, her short-lived façade of curiosity gave way to her immediate feeling of impending dread.

“That’s what I’m trying to do right now, Jess. Just, calm down.”

A low grumble had you standing further on edge, if that was possible at this point. The sound was clear as day and was anything but human. You weren’t even sure a human could get to an octave so low without the help of technology. Eyes darting upward once more, a chill ran from your shoulders to your toes.

Hauntingly yellowed eyes lingered upon the two of you. The beast-like figure was silhouetted by the moonlight, outlined like a ghost. It looked to be a man, but also anything but a man in the same sense. Its mouth was parted, baring old rotted teeth that looked to have dried blood caked between its gums. Its hands were bloodied as well, small cuts were painted across its forearms only hidden by the rags that clung to its chest.

Before you could process the situation, Jezebel let out another yelp. In an instant, the beast lunged down from its perch, landing with a ground shaking thud nearly five feet before you. “No!” Jezebel’s open palm collided with the space between your shoulder blades as she pushed you toward the monster. The last thing you saw was her backpack falling to the ground as she began running toward one of the homes. You landed face-first in the snow, groaning as all the air in your lungs were forced out. The beast snarled, once again showing its teeth as it hunched down to your level. This was, most certainly, not the way you envisioned dying. Things like this weren’t supposed to exist; this is myth, this isn’t real. It all felt like bad dream gone worse that you couldn’t wake from.

“Pesky creatures, aren’t they?” A new voice called out as the horrendous sound of metal crushing bone and muscle slithered through your ears. The disgusting feeling of gore instantly trickled down your hands. “Please,” the voice continued, “feel free to thank me anytime.”

A moment later, the stranger let out a scoff with the squishy suction of whatever he had used to quiet the monster. The tap of a boot on your elbow finally prompted you to uncover your eyes. “Or don’t.”

“I,” you started, opening and closing your mouth multiple times unable to find the right words, “thank you.”

“Oh.” He tiled the stiff rim of his frayed hat back, exposing a pair of circular sunglasses perched upon his nose. “Foreigners, eh?”

“Yeah, um.” You gathered yourself, finally pushing up to stand on your feet. “We got lost.”

“And ended up here, no doubt.” A stifled chuckle left his lips as he tilted his hat back in place and swung whatever he used to kill the beast over his shoulder. “If I were you, I’d get the hell out of here.”

Without another word, the stranger sauntered off with a backward wave of his hand. “Oh, and have someone clean this mess up.”

“Y/n!” Jezebel’s shrill voice called as she returned with a rather confused villager. He held a shotgun with both of his hands, Jezebel shone a flashlight in your eyes.

“Are you okay?” The villager moved forward with extreme caution after peering around you dumbfoundedly seeing the crumpled body.

“I’m fine, no thanks to her.” You spat, anger swelling in your throat causing a particular acidity to your words.

“All of you! Inside this instant.” A matronly holler came from behind Jezebel and the villager. “You know Miranda’s protection only runs so far as we grow closer to this time.”

Who is Miranda and, more importantly, who was the man who saved you?

The home you were ushered into was on the outskirts of town. It was one of the larger estates given the fact that some people seemed to live in one-room shacks. Upon entering, you were greeted with the warm glow of yellow light trickling in from what looked to be a formal living room. The sweet aromas of honeyed tea wafted through the air, drawing further in as the woman led the three of you deeper into the home. What was worse? You pondered. Being killed by that beast or potentially being murdered by the inhabitants of this home? You couldn’t decide. Thus far, the two gave no indication of malice.

“Please, sit.” The woman pulled out two of the chairs at her table, the wood scratching against the floor. “I’ll fetch the tea.”

Jezebel was so brainless. She smiled at you as if she hadn’t just offered you up as a midnight snack. Surely there was no hamster running on that squeaky track that powered her.

“What was that thing?” You turned to the man who was now seated to your right. “The monster.”

The man ignored your question, instead grabbing a piece of rounded bread from the plate at the center of table. Slathering butter on it, he looked to you. “How’d you kill it?”

“I didn’t.” You frowned, recalling the mysterious man who saved your life without even dropping his name. The villager raised his brows and kicked his foot up on the table. He was waiting for more information. “Some man came out of nowhere. He had some hammer-like weapon.”

As soon as he processed the words, his foot fell from the table and he leaned forward, uncomfortably close. You could smell the distinguishable bite of alcohol percolate from his lips. “Did he wear glasses? A hat?”

“He did.” The words slowly drifted from your mouth. “Hair to about here.” You motioned to the halfway point of your neck.

“Adelina,” the man called, presumably to the woman who guided you inside. He got up quickly, rushing to the other room leaving you and Jezebel alone.

“What the hell is going on here?” You whispered in a harsh tone, leaning forward to get closer to her. “Is this not weird at all to you?”

“I think they’re nice people.” Jezebel responded at full volume without a second of thought.

“That’s coming from someone who tried to feed their supposed best friend to a monster.”

“I was buying us time to get help.”

“Help? I almost died!”

“But you didn’t.”

“When we get back to the U.S. I never want to speak to you again.” You seethed. How could she be this bad? You knew there were a few… a considerable amount of screws missing from Jezebel, but how in God’s green earth does she justify her actions at this point? The thought of it accompanied by her dazed and empty stare only fueled the fire of anger more.

“Dear,” the woman, who you now knew was Adelina, reentered the room accompanied by the man with a tray of cups and a kettle in her hands. She set a delicate china glass in front of you, softly filling it with a reddish colored liquid that she assured you was Celestial Seasonings, a tea imported from Africa. “I hear that you’ve met Lord Heisenberg.” Placing a hand over her heart, she gave a warm smile that only sent another wave of dread through your body. There was something so alluring about this woman, yet so sinister.

“Lord, who?”

Adelina stiffened, craning her neck to the side as she plastered a forced smile upon her lips once more. You had upset her, that much was obvious. “One of the four Lords that rule here alongside our dear Mother Miranda.” She explained, pushing the cup of tea closer to your body. Jezebel had already finished her first glass. Warily, you lifted the cup in your hand and allowed the warm water to heat your frozen body. An elongated finger pointed to the framed painting that hung to the wall. “Mother Miranda protects us here.”

Mother Miranda. You could only focus on the image of the woman silhouetted by six black wings and a halo outlining her head. Her eyes were indistinguishable behind the raven-like mask that clung to her face. Adorned in a black garb, she looked to be a holy figure in this town. But like Adelina, something just wasn’t right with Miranda.

The unsettling reverb of crickets and cicadas chirping grew louder and louder with each passing hour. You counted the seconds between waves of mass chorus; so far, it was roughly thirty seconds between each bleating scream of their nightly tune. You couldn’t sleep. Despite the somewhat comforting, but entirely unsettling welcome given by Adelina and Marion, you couldn’t help but feel like a caged animal in the tiny cupboard room they had given you. A curious thought tickled the back of your mind, willing you to remain as alert as possible after an exhausting day of hiking; where had they put Jezebel? Not that you particularly cared at this point. After the attack she had done a 180, dropping all suspicion of malice in this village. She simply flushed the pictures of hanging heads and wild beasts from her memory. You sometimes envied her lackadaisical memory accompanied by a fanatical view of the world. Living blissfully ignorant, especially in a situation like this, seemed to serve her best.

After a small dinner of fish that smelled of ammonia, of which you politely picked at, Adelina insisted the two of you stay the night. “The beasts will return!” She exclaimed, holding a firm hand over the intricately carved wood of the doorframe. “Early tomorrow we can arrange for a car to pick you up from the next town over.” Hushed murmurs climbing up from the cracked floors pulled you from your thought. The voices spoke in an incomprehensible argument.

“I’d quite like to keep...” the words faded in and out.

“No, no, no. Don’t be ridiculous...”

“What if....”

The floor spoke a soft squeak from beneath your feet as you shifted to get closer to the voices. Their conversation stopped, and you waited with bated breath for it to continue.

“We have to offer someone up tomorrow.” It was Adelina.

“I know, I know.” Marion sounded frustrated. “But you know Mother Miranda prefers only the purest. How are we supposed to know if either of them are-”?

The words faded once more as the two moved from room to room. Walking on the sides of your feet, you followed. Peeking around the corner, your eyes landed on Adelina and Marion illuminated by a flickering fire. They stood close to one another, keeping their tones low.

“Clearly, we offer the frumpy one. Take a look at her. There’s no doubt in my mind that she’s unexperienced.” Adelina snickered, taking a seat on the worn couch with her back to you. “She wouldn’t fit in here anyway.”

“The dumb one would get along nicely with our son.”

“I agree.”

A knock at the front door sent a shiver of adrenaline down your spine. Quickly scrambling to hide, you took in a deep breath as Marion passed by with his shotgun in hand. From the parted door, you could see the sun barely peeking over the horizon. Had it really been that long already?

“Are you sure she’s pure?” The new man stood in the doorway rushed past Marion, looking in the direction of the room they had put you in.

“I suppose we could check.” Adelina called, rising to join the others. “The both of them had that tea. They shouldn’t wake until the ceremony later today.”

“Is she in there?”

“Yes, the other one is upstairs.”

“Let’s check this one first.”

With heavy footsteps falling upon the rotting floorboards of the somewhat dilapidated home, you slunk further into the shadows of the room behind you. The glint of something metal caught your attention; a small handgun sat perfectly on a dresser as if set there intentionally for you to find. Holding your breath, you crept forward to it. You’d never shot a gun in your life, but you knew the basics... both hands, check for ammo, rack the slide, pull the trigger. At least, that’s what the movies told you.

“Out of bed so soon, are we?” The soft voice turned malevolent as Adelina appeared in the doorway of the room. “I wouldn’t use that if I were you.” She motioned to the gun that was aimed rather unskillfully for her chest.

“What the fuck is going on in this village?” You spoke with purpose now, tone wavering slightly as Marion stepped behind his wife.

“You don’t understand things around here, girl.” Adelina spat, moving aside as Marion began charging into the room. The loud blast of the gun echoed from the walls of the home followed by a harsh curse and the sound of a body crumpling to the floor. You had shot Marion in the leg; he’d live.

“No,” you started, re-racking the slide as Adelina’s other friend approached wielding a similar gun to your own. Adrenaline washed over your nervous system, your hands shook violently, but you attempted to remain composed. “You’re the one who doesn’t understand. This isn’t normal! Tell me what’s going on now or,” your eyes trailed down to Marion who was attempting to control the flow of blood from his wound.

“You wouldn’t.” She laughed bitterly.

“Like hell, I wouldn’t.” You exclaimed, training the gun onto her. “Now tell me, what’s happening here.”

“You’ll understand soon enough.” Adelina’s friend’s words were the last thing you heard before your ears rang and the sting of a bullet burnt white hot in your shoulder. You weren’t sure if your gun ever went off again.

Despite being tied, bathed, dressed, and currently sitting on a freezing alter-of-sorts, you still hadn’t the slightest clue as to what was going on. A crowd of villagers surrounded from the south, all carrying on with a rumble of conversation. Adelina shot daggers at you, Marion as well, from a small, inclined hill at the edge of the crowd. The clothes you wore were your own, she had fished through your backpack claiming that it was of no use to waste a nice dress on “someone like her.” Jezebel was likely still fast asleep at their house.

A woman with the likeness of the framed photo you had seen appeared out of nowhere. So, this was the famous Mother Miranda that everyone regarded so deeply. She stood before you as the crowd’s voices hushed and their eyes became hazed with looks of admiration and devoted appreciation. Surely, she was a human, deities and gods didn’t exist in a physical form, you assured yourself.

Without a word, Miranda moved gracefully as if flowing across the ground to stand before Adelina. Taking her face between her hands, she whispered what you assumed to be praise as Adelina’s lips moved rapidly thanking Miranda. She then moved to Marion and grazed her hand against the wound on his thigh, speaking of how his steadfast devotion would quickly heal any injuries of cruelty spread by evil. When her attention finally fell back to you, she frowned. Stalking around you in circles, Miranda’s imposing figure made you want to shrivel to nothingness.

“Thank you.” She turned to the villagers as if to dismiss them. “When the time comes, I will return for another.”

The black wings you had seen in the photo sprouted from her back, shielding your sight of the villagers as they retreated to their homes. Hopeful cries and shouted blessings to Miranda echoed from the crowd as the village gate slammed. The only evidence of them once populating this empty square were flowers and offerings of fruit and grain left for the supposed goddess.

The world swiftly darkened once more.

Part 2 - Paths Meet

I promise there's more Heisenberg in the next part..

Feedback is always appreciated

#karl heisenberg #heisenberg x reader #karl heisenburg x reader #resident evil village #resident evil heisenberg #re8 heisenberg #heisenberg imagine #lord heisenberg

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yesimwriting · 4 years ago

Note

Hello! Your Nikolai fic tranquility is so beautiful! Can you write more for Nikolai? Maybe the opposite with reader having a nightmare? Or whatever you want just please give me more! If you have a tagging list I'd love to be included btw :)

A/n hii!! first off,, thank you! i was a little nervous about writing him for the first time,, but i love him so much (even though i love a good villain/morally grey character in love i think nikolai would probably make the least toxic bf in the grishaverse lol)

you gave me a little too much freedom here lol bc i have so many ideas for him!! lowkey might need to give him a longer fic/series soon when i catch up with requests!! WOW THIS FIC IS SO LONG AND FOR WHAT

Summary: Reader is a handmaid who has grown up assisting Nikolai. Through the years, the two have developed a special relationship that most definitely breaks royal protocol--they’re best friends and rivals on a good day, and dangerously close to being something more the second either of them is remotely upset or extremely happy. Learning about the fact that Nikolai was almost engaged to Alina (a good friend of yours) and being reminded of the fact that as royalty Nikolai has many prospects (both serious women worthy of his title and women only suitable for trysts meant to relieve tension) has you both realizing something you should have years ago.

Word count: 31210

Warnings: disclaimer--may not be the most cannon thing ever,, but i wanted the ‘child of the help competes and falls in love with the child of royalty’ energy okay?? Lol

I could do a whole blurb series with this dynamic nikolai x reader,, like just stories of them growing up together and randomly realizing they might like each other romantically?? I probably shouldn’t rn but i ADORE this trope.

The perfection of the room is disappointing. Idle hands, idle thoughts--so I work to smooth out a perfect duvet. Still, the thoughts come--aggressive and unavoidable. It’s silly, maybe even sad, to feel possessive over something that’s never been yours, something that could never be yours, but the harder I fight off the feeling the stronger it grows. Jealousy is a weed growing quickly in my chest, vile roots planted firmly in my heart.

Normally my favorite part of the day would be waiting for Nikolai to return to his room in the palace after dinner and his evening duties. He’s always a bit softer in the evenings, during my last check-in of the day. I’m normally thrilled to be done organizing his room early because that means the second he arrives there will be no distraction. Most evenings, he’ll find me perched in the seat by his bed, reading. He’ll mock-scold me for daring to defy his orders and reading ahead from the book we both take turns reading aloud from each night. He then warns me that I better react exactly the way I did when I first read it or else. That threat is always followed by a gentle laugh.

Tonight I’m in no mood for our nightly banter or even our nightly reading. My mother had warned me of the dangers of getting too comfortable with the royal family. I should have heeded that warning when she first gave it to me, the morning she found Nikolai and I fast asleep on a couch in the library as children. The palace likes to bring up the children of the staff by training them to attend to the next generation of royals. It makes the staff more efficient, a lifetime of knowing what someone wants makes you better for them. It also creates some level of connection, making betrayal a little less likely. Nikolai and I might have taken it farther than most. But now I want a reminder of the way we’re supposed to be--maybe if I detach now the bleeding of my heart won’t kill me. That has to remain secret, because if I explain it to Nikolai something in me will break. The one line between us will be crossed.

This will be the sixth secret I’ve kept from Nikolai in my entire life.

The secrets:

I don’t know why I was picked for Nikolai. I wasn’t particularly skilled, but still, the day came when my mother was told that I now worked directly for the Lantsov boy. It’s an honor, a true one, but my mother had been a little nervous. To whom much is given, much is expected--and I detested Nikolai. Not for being a prince, but for being a prince who thought girls couldn’t race or fight.

The day my mother came looking for me because I never showed up for dinner and she found Nikolai and I attempting to fight in the way only a ten-year-old girl and eleven-year-old boy would, she had looked truly mortified. Nikolai had only laughed, either oblivious to my mother’s embarrassment or uncaring about it. He had then hugged me--an expression of care that had left me reeling. I saw him more as a rival than someone to tend to, but in that moment I saw him as a friend. Even more so when he told me he didn’t want me to go yet and that he was upset that so much of the day had been wasted by studies that kept him with boring people and away from me. And then he invited me to his lessons--my mother was quick to attempt to decline politely, but the desires of a prince at any age outweigh that of a mother.

After that, everyone kind of just stopped trying to remind us of our propriety. The tutor at first was concerned about my presence, but Nikolai remained stubborn. I wasn’t a big enough deal to cause an argument, so I began to attend lessons with him almost every day, only staying away when my mother needed aid with laundry or cleaning. His parents must have been somewhat aware of our friendship, but they must have been oblivious to our closeness because it was never mentioned.

My mother’s worry began to ease, she’d even started to take some pride when I’d come to our room proudly proclaiming that I scored two marks higher than Nikolai. She did, however, warn that it might be more tactful to let him score higher.

The comment was casual, just a suggestion, but it left me feeling wrong. It was the first time since we met that I had thought about our different statuses. I didn’t tell him--and that was the first secret I ever kept from him.

As we grew, we traded physical competition for academic rivalry, trying to best each other in both lessons and games of strategy like chess and cards. But with growing comes responsibility. Nikolai started to have obligations that were meant to be private. I couldn’t follow him at all times. But he’d always come back from locked door meetings grinning like he carried schoolyard gossip instead of government secrets. He shared everything with me, even when I playfully warned against it.

He’d always step closer when I teased that perhaps he shouldn’t tell me everything. And then he’d say, “If I can’t trust you, then I can’t trust anyone--and I don’t want to live in a world like that.” Often, he’d give my hand a light squeeze before moving on like he had not said anything intimate.

On a day in which Nikolai was in one of those meetings, I became a woman. When I first saw the blood, I had been horrified--but my mother was quick to explain that it was natural. She said that I was now a woman, a wonderful thing, really--but a thing that came with obligations. She told me that I could no longer have the impromptu ‘sleepovers’ with Nikolai unless he ordered it. I told her he’s never ordered me to do anything for him.

She didn’t ease, something in her had started to become nervous again. My mother had recently started to act the way she did when Nikolai and I first became friends. I didn’t want to fall asleep in Nikolai’s bed while I was bleeding, but I didn’t want to never have another sleepover with him again. Especially not when she refused to explain why being a woman changed so much.

I had decided to avoid Nikolai as much as possible until the sting of my mother’s new rule faded. Unfortunately, that night Nikolai was extra talkative--excited as he insisted I stay for a little longer. Soon, I found his familiar good naturedness melting away my nerves and before I knew it I was laughing in the middle of the night. When my eyelids started to feel heavy, I had moved from the chair, ready to head back to my room.

Nikolai had looked at me oddly before he asked why would I leave so late when it would be easier for me to just sleepover? It was an innocent question, he did not know about my change and I had wanted to keep it that way.

I tried playing coy, but Nikolai has always had a talent for getting around my better judgement. I don’t recall exactly how it happened, but I remember him standing in front of me. It was the first time I noticed how much had actually changed over the years--he was now taller than me for the first time in his life. His hair had started to grow a little longer, golden and soft-looking--and his face seemed much more angular. But he had not lost his boyish charm.

“Y/n?” My name fell softly from his lips, and that was the first time I had ever noted the fullness of them. I didn’t understand why I considered that something worth noting. “Did I do something to make you mad at me?”

Perhaps I had been a little curt--nerves and hormones had left me not feeling like myself. I didn’t tell him about the bleeding, I couldn’t. That became the second secret I kept from him--but I did tell him that my mother had told me I was a woman now, and that women can’t have sleepovers. Not with those of the opposite gender. I made no effort to hide my confusion because I expected him to be as perplexed as I was. But he was not confused--in fact, he had the audacity to laugh. My face flushed, but I did not know why.

“Why is that funny?” Maybe he thought I was still too much of a child to be considered a woman. I assumed it a fair assumption, I had not grown the way he had--my shoulders had not become sturdier and I had not become particularly broader. Still, I would rather melt into the floor than tell him about the reason my mother now considered me a woman. “My mother did say that, and I don’t know what being a ‘woman’ has to do with staying in your room at night.” Something strange had crossed over his features then, something much more brooding than I was used to.

I had blinked at him as unexplained nerves pooled in my stomach. Perhaps that look would have been enough to keep me silent if he had managed to not grin. That self-assured grin that had always challenged me. “Well since you know everything about my mother now, maybe you can tell me why she’s been acting strange. She’s starting to act the way she did when we first became friends.” I expected him to at least pretend to be worried. Perhaps his parents had spoken to her and had mentioned wanting our friendship to end. But his grin had only grown. Pride left me angry. “She did say that I could stay if you ordered it--but I’m glad you’ve never ordered me to do anything, so I can leave right now because you’re acting as odd as her. I don’t understand what you could find funny about our friendship ending.”

He had stopped me from storming out of his room by placing one hand on the wall between me and the door. “Y/n, don’t be cross--I’ll explain it all, I promise.” Angry pride made me want to storm away from him, but curiosity and something unknown and warm kept me in place. “Do you remember when we read the play about the rival families, how the two main characters had kissed?”

I remembered that part of the play especially well. The concept of kissing so casually, outside of marriage, had been jarring to me. “Yes.”

“Now that we’re older, your mother must be worried that we might do that.” He paused before leaning against the arm he placed on the wall to keep me from leaving a little more. “Kiss.”

The clarification was not needed--in that brief pause, I had allowed myself to imagine no distance between our lips. Something in me burned with embarrassment when I realized that some part of me found the thought appealing. The only thing I wanted in that moment was assurance that Nikolai would never know I felt that. That was my third secret, and the weight of it was heavy against my chest.

Still, though, all of my confusion had not yet left. “Is there much harm in a kiss?”

The question had left an odd smile on his lips. “There’s potential harm in what it could lead to for the woman, but not so much for the man.” He exhaled slowly as my face tensed. He could always read me too well because he was quick to add, “What it could lead to isn’t a bad thing, it’s meant to be pleasurable, but it’s serious.” I did not understand, but a part of me was starting to grow okay with that. Nikolai’s voice had started to become lower than ever, and his gaze remained tense. Perhaps if I accepted the confusion for now, things could go back to normal. If the conversation ended, I could stop thinking of his lips and his hands and what it would mean for them to touch me. “It’s considered a vice, like drinking or gambling.” The additional comment helped more than it should have. A vice--not scary and not painful, but not something to indulge in. That’s enough explanation for now. “If you want to know, I won’t deny you.”

I appreciated the offer tremendously. The vice that comes after kissing is clearly something that’s been intentionally kept from me. It’s something he was privy to that I was not, and he offered it to me like so much else. But if knowledge that my mother feared us kissing made me think of his lips, then I doubted I could handle knowing what comes after kissing.

“I’ll let you know when I want to know, but I appreciate the offer.” It felt like a fair response. His snarky grin came back immediately. Irritation rooted itself in my stomach. I hated not knowing more than him for once, but I still had one question I could not relinquish. “But what does that vice have to do with orders?”

At that, his smugness faltered. “It’s not unheard of, for princes and handmaids--for a prince to obligate a handmaid in order to fulfill his vice. Though many handmaids fill the vice of their own will for benefits.

The explanation left him like a confession. I didn’t understand his hesitance--it’s not like he’d ever make me do anything I didn’t want to do. Even when I worked, he was hesitant to ask me to go out of my way to bring him a glass of water. And I couldn’t imagine gaining anything from offering Nikolai something I didn’t really understand. I wasn’t naive to the fact that my life had more privileges than many palace servants. “Oh.”

His eyes hardened. “You know I’d never--”

“I know.” It was finally easy to smile again. “I never thought otherwise.” Something in him seemed to ease at that, his eyes went from hard to warm in less than a second.

I had no more questions for him and I was also no longer a flight risk, but Nikolai did not move. He did not step back to create a more appropriate distance and he did not drop his arm. His gaze, however, did move--dropping downwards, and slightly away from my eyes. I did the same, my eyes falling to his lips.

The silence between us began to make me feel like something in me was in danger of overflowing. “Then I guess my mother is once again worrying for no reason.” Strangely, I did not feel the need to feel embarrassed about staring at his lips. “Because I would never particularly want to kiss you, Nikolai Lantsov.”

The comment was meant to be teasing, a joke to clear away unknown tension. I should have known better than to challenge his pride because he instinctually moved his hand off the wall and beneath my chin. I did not flinch when he tilted my head upwards slightly with his fingers. “I could get you to want to kiss me if I wanted to.”

Three secrets in one night. I did not think I could bear a fourth one. “Hm…” The ground we treaded on felt unstable, but something in me trusted Nikolai to not let me falter. “I should--I should go before I give my mother anymore cause to worry.”

His fingers had brushed down my chin easily as he dropped his hand. “I’ll see you tomorrow morning.”

And that he did. The days passed without mention of the last time he asked me to sleepover. It was as if nothing had changed except now I found myself noting things I most definitely did not want to note. These didn’t feel like individual secrets because it felt easy to group each admirational thought into one secret. Soon, that became my new normal--easy banter, easy touches of hands, and easy yet silent admirations of his beauty.

I never wandered too hard about what the vice that kissing can lead to entailed. I didn't particularly want to know, but knowing that I could ask Nikolai at any time brought a sense of security to me. But besides that, I never thought of that conversation until the day I was asked to look for Nikolai because he was late for dinner.

That in itself was odd, most of the time when Nikolai was late it was because he was with you. I checked his room, two other rooms he was known to frequent, and then finally the library. First, I noticed a handmaid two years older than me. I was finally at an age when one begins to compare their beauty to those around them, and I recognized the girl as gorgeous. She was better endowed than me, physically, and she always seemed fun. And then I noticed Nikolai, standing closer to her than I’ve ever seen him stand to anyone. His expression was serious as the girl giggled.

Nikolai’s expression shifted from tense to shocked when he saw me. “Y/n.”

It took me a moment longer than it should have to realize what I had interrupted. Guilt and jealousy were quick to twist in my stomach. “Dinner--your parents sent me to look for you.”

He was quick to walk around the girl, who was quick to glare at me. I attempted to disappear down the hall after mumbling a quick apology, but Nikolai was faster than me.

“Y/n,” he did not hesitate to grab my wrist.

It shouldn’t have irked me the way it did, after all, neither of us had ever really hesitated to touch each other. I had always reached for him when I wanted him, and he had done the same. But the thought of the same hands that touched the most beautiful girl I had ever seen on me left me bitter in a way I didn’t understand.

Still, I pushed through all of that. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to interrupt anything, your mother asked me to look for you because she assumed you’d be with me when you were late to dinner. I didn’t think that there’d be--”

“You didn’t interrupt anything.” The words came out flat as his eyes took on the same quality they did the night he explained my mother’s concern to me. “Valaria wishes there was something to interrupt, but there wasn’t.”

Oh. I refused to let the correction inflate me. “Would you like me to not come to your room tonight?”

The offer felt awkward to make. “No,” the answer came quickly, “In fact, go there now--I want to see you right after dinner. I’ve missed you today.” The instruction left my face feeling warm. “We could read an extra chapter of our book if you’d like.”

Despite myself, I grinned. “Yes.”

“Looking forward to it.”

True to his word, Nikolai was quick to return to his room. He had come back to me eagerly, going out of his way to squeeze my shoulder as he entered the room.

I opened the book to the chapter we had left off on, but before I could start reading, Nikolai stopped me. “Sit next to me?”

The question came softly. It had been some time since we sat next to each other on his bed. Still, I moved off of the chair and to his bed. Something in me longed for the familiar closeness of childhood. I allowed him to play with my fingers as I read.

“You know you could take one night off from me if you wanted to.” The admission left me softly, part of unsure if he was still paying attention to my words. “She was pretty, it wouldn’t have hurt my feelings if you told me you wanted me to not come tonight.”

Nikolai exhaled easily, squeezing my fingers once. “I said I wanted to see you and I meant it.”

It took all of my energy to push past the way his words made my stomach leap. “In general, if you ever--”

Nikolai cut me off by laying his head on my lap the way he used to. “I don’t want to talk about this anymore.” It was the first time in years that he spoke to me in a way that acknowledged his authority. “Keep reading please.”

And that was the last time we had ever mentioned other handmaids in that context. The fifth secret I ever kept from him was the way I worried that one day that would change.

The door creaks open while I’m in the middle of fluffing an already pristine pillow. Nikolai steps into the room, but I continue to work.

“Darling,” he breathes too easily, “Today has been painful.” I straighten, looking at him as casually as I can manage. “And now I have to deal with you being mad at me.”

Damn him and his ability to read me with one look. “I’m not mad.”

“You know you can’t lie to me,” he sighs, stepping forward, “We’ve known each other too long for that.”

I press my lips together, irrational anger pushing itself into me at an odd angle. “We’ve also known each other too long to keep secrets.”

His eyebrows draw together, a look so quizzical I’m reminded of our schooling days. “What secrets have I kept from you?”

Mentioning that had been a mistake. I exhale as flatly as possible. “I shouldn’t have mentioned it.” My dismissal only has Nikolai’s expression hardening. I drop my gaze. “Unless you need something, I’m retiring my services for the evening.”

I take a reluctant step towards the door, eyes attached to the floor. “Y/n,” his voice is gentle. “What is it?”

“It’s nothing, I’m just tired.” Please let that be at least somewhat believable. “I’m sure I’ll feel more like myself in the morning.” I take another step, a little more assured. Nikolai’s hand is on my shoulder before I can escape. “Nikolai--”

“Y/n,” his voice is that of velvet, “I can’t have you be mad at me. Not now.”

Sighing, I meet his gaze. The tiredness I see behind his eyes is almost enough to chase away my nerve. What I’d give to be able to melt into our familiar routine. “Then you should have told me you were almost engaged to a literal Saint--the same literal Saint who’s one of my closest friends.”

Nikolai’s expression shifts as his hand drops from my shoulder slowly, fingers brushing down my arm before he finally intertwines our fingers. I bite my tongue to avoid squeezing his hand, but I don’t move to separate us either. He studies me silently, eyebrows drawn together. The longer he stares, the more whatever turmoil he’s experiencing seems to dissipate. After a minute of silence, I can read his expression perfectly. His lips are pressed together in that coy way--the way he only looks when he’s suppressing a smile.

I loathe him for it. “Nikolai Lantsov, don’t you dare laugh--not after what you did. Do you have any idea what it felt like to have Alina casually mention the fact that you almost married her casually? Like that was common knowledge to everyone but me?”

My words break away the last of his self control. He grins, flashing his annoyingly perfect teeth. “Do you have any idea what it feels like for me to want nothing more than to see you and then you let me believe something may actually be wrong when the only issue is your jealousy?”

The amusement in his tone is like poison to me. I find the strength to jerk my hand away from him. “I am not jealous.” He laughs; I am further enraged. “I am not.” The genuineness of my anger must finally register on some level, because he tries to suppress his smile. “I have every right to be mad at my best friend for not telling me that he was almost married.”

“We didn’t exactly come close,” he manages, expression still much too light for my taste. “I’m glad for Alina’s sake, I’m not sure being a Saint would be enough to protect her.”

He is infuriating. “I’m not sure anything you have will be enough to protect you.”

Something in his gaze shifts, softening the tilt of his mouth. “I don’t doubt that.”

I don’t know what I expected from him--but not this. I thought he’d be at least somewhat apologetic. “You should have told me.”

“I would have if I felt it was significant.”

“I’m your best friend--your marriage is significant to me. And even though it’s not like you’re engaged to her right now, you should have told me. You know I talk to Alina all the time.”

He sighs once, a hint of apology threatening to ghost over his eyes. “If I knew not knowing would have upset you so much I would have told you. I was--I was just so excited to be around you again I didn’t see much relevance in anything that didn’t involve you.”

The intensity that Nikolai regards me with is enough to wither all of my fury. But without my anger, I am left spiraling in emotion that I’ve been pushing against for years. My mother’s warning about relationships with those above us rings in my ears--sharp and headache inducing. I am still when he reaches for my hand again, but I do no allow myself to return the gentle squeeze of his fingers.

“I’m not sure much outside of you has significance.” He’s giving me a look I am familiar with. A look he often uses to chase away my anger.

Without my anger, I have nothing to keep me from melting into him, indulging in his presence fully. It’s so easy with him and I blinded myself to the danger of that. He may not be marrying Alina, but one day he will marry someone. A person worthy of his status--and what would I be left doing? Washing their laundry? Tearing up when I dusted the library and came across a book we had read together? Enough damage has already been done--I need to cut myself with this blade now in hopes of making sure I can one day recover.

He will get married one day, and nothing will be the same. And that’s a good thing--he deserves the love of a princess or queen. I want his happiness, even if it’s not with me. But some vindictive part of me hopes that some part of him will miss me. That some part of him will be dulled without me.

I’m a fool--he will remember me as the handmaid from his youth. The girl who made him laugh once or twice before he grew up. I force my hand out of his grasp. “You can’t win me over with words every time.” I need to get out of here before he says something that makes me lose all resolve. “Tomorrow morning I’ll be here to prepare you for breakfast.”

“Y/n.”

I step forward, refusing to look at him. “Goodnight.”

He sighs, his hand quick to grab my arm. Before I can question him I feel myself pulled back. I expect him to pull me just close enough so that I have to meet his gaze. He continues, pulling me sharply before placing a quick hand on my shoulder, forcing me down. My back hits his bed.

I sit up as soon as the reality of what just happened seeps into my mind. “Nikolai, what in the Saints--”

“If you’re going to act like a child, I’m going to treat you like one.”

I scoff, thoughts of escaping him put on hold by the principle of pride. Fine. I’ll beat him one last time, and then I’ll let us separate. I shove him. He laughs--of course this is funny to him. He got to keep fighting past the age of about eleven. His laughter adds to my anger, I move to shove him again, but he catches my wrist easily. I struggle against his hold, shoving him a third time with my still free hand. He pushes me slightly. That’s all it takes to unleash familiar habits.

Our small fight is hardly fair. He has all the advantage--more training, and he’s standing above me. When I finally make a move that might give me some success, Nikolai leans forward. He practically tackles me, his weight forcing me flat against the bed.

I move an arm, ready to push him off of me. Nikolai snags my wrists, holding them above my head. “This means I win.” I roll my eyes, anger returning.

“Let me go.”

He sighs tiredly, but the smugness radiating off of him is suffocating. “Admit that you were jealous.”

There are a lot of things I am willing to do for him--but never that. I cannot give him the one separation I still have. “I wasn’t.”

“Then why are you mad?”

I press my lips together. “I told you--”

“Do you really think you could lie to me?”

“You don’t know me that well.”

Nikolai moves his freehand, touching my chin as a way to ask me to look at him. I meet his gaze hesitantly. “Yes, I do, and that’s never bothered you before but it does now.”

Maybe this is a conversation better had bluntly. “It bothers me now because you’re too old to hold onto the daughter of a palace handmaid and I’m too old to pretend that our different statuses don’t matter.”

“Y/n,” he breathes, “Nothing’s changed. Status didn’t matter to me when we were children, and it doesn’t matter to me now.”

“You can afford to say things like that.”

“What good is my title if it means I can’t,” he pauses, eyes hesitant, “If I can’t keep things the same between us?”

I smile, the sadness of the look weighs on me and I can’t even see it. “Nikolai, you always knew things would change.”

“No, I--”

“You can’t tell me you think your future wife would like you having such a close relationship with a handmaid.” I press my lips together. “One day you’ll fall in love and get married and you’ll want me to leave your bedchamber as soon as dinner is over because you’ll be eager to spend time with your wife.” His gaze hardens. “And that’s not a bad thing. It’s actually a really good thi--”

The last syllable of my sentence dies in my throat. Nikolai, who must be possessed by something, leans down and presses his lips against mine. I beg myself to resist, but his gentleness is everything I’ve ever wanted. He releases my hands in favor of holding my face. That’s all it takes--my hands move without my permission, into his hair--pulling him closer to me. What am I doing? I’m insane. Placing my hands on his chest cautiously, I push just slightly. He’s quick to obey, pulling away while allowing his teeth to brush against my bottom lip.

I gape at him--taking in his now slightly swollen lips. “Nikolai.” He can’t do this to me. We’re friends. Despite the fact that I’ve loved him more than I should--we’re friends. “You’re being extremely unfair.”

He draws his eyebrows together, sitting up quickly and moving off of me. “I’m being unfair? I have spent my entire life loving y--”

I sit up, furious in a new way. “You have not!” This is the dumbest I have ever been. I move to stand, still feeling the softness of his lips against mine.

“Your tooth fell out.” The sharpness of his words forces me to still.

“What?”

I can’t bring myself to turn and look at him, but I’ve always been able to feel any heaviness he bears. The weight of it leaves little room for air in my lungs. “You were ten. I told you ‘girls couldn’t fight’ so you punched me in the face. That was the first time we ever fought--I didn’t mean to hit you in the face, but you moved. You moved and I hit you in the mouth and your last baby tooth fell out. I expected you to cry or get angry, but you just blinked at me and laughed. You were happy to lose your last baby tooth because it meant you were grown up. And then you smiled and asked me if you looked older. If anything, the gap in your smile made you look younger but I told you that you looked like a grown-up because I wanted you to keep smiling. Because your smile made me feel like I won something.” I turn on my heels, but I cannot meet his gaze. “That was the moment I fell in love with you--so don’t tell me I haven’t spent my entire life loving you.”

The weight of his words is harder to survive against than the heaviness of his feelings. “Nikolai, you know we can’t ever be together--”

“Why not?”

“Don’t act like you don’t know,” I manage, voice low, “You almost married the Sun Summoner--”

“That was political--”

“Exactly, your marriage is meant to be political, and if it happens to be out of love--which is what I hope you get, because it is what you deserve--it will be to someone of status.”

Nikolai stands, the movement is that of a king, not the boy I know. “I do not want status or to love someone else--I want you.”

“I can’t take that from you--”

“You can’t take anything from me because I’ve already given it all to you.”

I press my lips together, heart tearing for him. “I love you too much to ruin you.”

My words seem to snap something in him because his eyes darken, the way he watches me adjusting accordingly. “You can’t ruin something that’s always been yours.”

I let myself smile. At him. At his words. At the foolish hope the child in me has clung to after all of these years. I reach for him thoughtlessly, because I have the right to. Because I’ve always had the right to. He’s quick to respond, kissing me with much more security than before.

This time, he pulls away of his own regard. “You still haven’t admitted that you were jealous.”

His teasing smugness isn’t as sour to me anymore. “I wasn’t.”

Nikolai pulls me towards him easily, lips threatening to brush against me, warm breath against my face. “Are you sure, darling? You were awfully quick to claim what’s yours.”

I roll my eyes, grinning so widely I’m surprised my face doesn’t yet hurt. “You’re the one that fell for a ten-year-old girl with a bloody mouth.”

When he smiles back at me, he places a hand on my hip, pulling me forward slightly. “That I did.” He pulls me forward slightly. "Does this mean you can sleep in here again?"

"If anything, this is more reason for me to sleep in another room." He rolls his eyes, pulling me even closer. "But I won't tell if you don't."

Nikolai leans forward, pressing his lips to my forehead. "Deal."

tags: @deardiarystuff @theincredibledeadlyviper, @grishaverse7 @benbarnes-supremacy @tranquilitymoon @kaitlyn2907 @lunamyangel @christinawxxx @deceivedeer @real-mbappe @tonks33

#nikolai lantsov #nikolai lantsov x reader #nikolai lantsov x you #shadow and bone #shadow and bone fic #shadow and bone fanfic #shadow and bone imagine #grisha #Grishaverse #grishaverse imagines #grishaverse imagine #grishaverse x reader #shadow and bone netflix

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levi-ships-eruri · 4 years ago

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Levi Ackerman NSFW Alphabet

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Levi is a cleanliness freak and after a few moments of holding you and making sure that you are okay, he would get up and change the sheets. Means, you have to get up, too. And while you are up, you should go and take a shower. He will join you there and MAYBE this will lead to a second round. However, he will definitely make sure you are alright, clean, and safe. And tbh, there is no better feeling than going back to bed with Levi and cuddle into the fresh sheets.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Levi is quite confident about his body despite his height. On himself, he especially likes his hands and his long, slender, and calloused fingers. They are quite aestethic and he knows how to use them on you, reaching places inside you that your own fingers cannot reach. However, these hands are also shed in blood. Therefore he loves to see that his hands can also be soft and caring on your body, and bring pleasure instead of death.

On you, Levi is definitely an ass and thigh kind of guy. But his favourite body part of you is your face: eyes, lips, nose, jawline... He loves when you glance over to him from the other side of the room, a little smile on your lips. He loves the blush tinting your cheeks. He loves the soft look in your eyes when you tell him that you love him. He loves to see you let loose when you come on him.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Levi HATES to make a mess. So when he comes, he comes inside of you. He also thinks this is quite intimate and therefore likes it (plus, secretly thinking he is marking you. Boy sometimes is insecure). When it comes to oral, he wouldn’t force you to swallow. If you wanna spit it out, he would hand you a tissue. Same if something drips out of your mouth because sometimes he comes A LOT.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Levi is pretty vocal about sex and wouldn’t hide something from you, not even the awkward first-time-stories. But there is one thing he is shy talking about... he is not one to share his partner. EXCEPT for the two persons he trusts the most: Hanji and Erwin. Levi caught himself thinking about a threesome with his partner and one of them (or...a foursome...no too much trouble), but he would not dare to bring it up. He would be super embarassed if Erwin turned down the idea and he wouldn’t want Hanji to tell everybody or to brag about it (they would do this, let’s be honest).

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Levi is over 30 years old, so he had gathered some experience. He started in the underworld, not necessarily because of need, but because he thinks it is something he is...supposed to do? Something that was normal for people to do? Later he also had sex when he needed to release some anger, and only later started to really enjoy it and to think about what techniques would please his partner. So, when the two of you start having sex, this guy knows what he does and is willing to learn everything about you and your preferations.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Doggy: He loves to push you down, a hand between your shoulders, your ass up in the air, pounding into you.

Missonary: Levi is a broken man and he loves to hold you close to him and bury his face into the crock of your neck.

Sitting: Both of you sitting, your legs wrapped around him, bodies closely pressed together, hand and lips everywhere they can reach. It is the most intimate position for the really emotional times.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? Are they humorous? etc.)

Levi is pretty serious in the bedroom, but he will make cocky remarks and smile a lot (sometimes also cocky, sometimes soft). Sometimes you will break out laughing because he cannot shut his shitmouth and will say something downright ridiculous.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? Does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

His hair down there is dark as well and neatly groomed, maybe even completely shaved. He is aware that bodyhair does not have anything to do with bad hygene, but he just feels better shaved or groomed. Levi’s body hair (and facial hair) also takes a lot of time to grow due to his time in the underground, but in this case it is rather beneficial for him.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Levi is super intimate. Not necessarily overly romantic, but intimate. This is something between you and him, something special. So unless it is a quicky during stressful times, he will take his time and make sure that both of you feel good and loved. Often having sex with him is the closest you ever feel to him because Levi can show his affection better by acts than by words. Afterwards you sometimes have the deepest conversations.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Levi’s sex drive is not the highest and he has no problem with not jerking off for a while. When he feels the need to do it, he will do it during his super effective shower sessions because this way it wouldn’t make a mess.

However, when he is in a relationship, his longing gets stronger. If he cannot see you for some time or if the two of you just cannot find any time for the do, he will have a frustrating jack-off session, which only causes his need for you to grow.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Captain Kink: Levi likes to take the dominant part. He likes to hear you call him Heichou in bed, but not too often (he loves his name from your lips even more).

Bondage: Levi loves to tie you up and make you squirm beneath him. Orgasm denial is not a real kink of him, BUT he will do it all the time when you are tied up. When he gives you oral in this state, you can be sure it will take at least AN HOUR before he lets you cum.

Stockings: Since he is a leg guy, he enjoys seeing you wearing stockings. And he wouldn’t admit, but seeing you taking on your boots and gear the next morning is a huge turn on for him. He cannot wait to take them off again in th evening.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

His bed or the floor of his room, where he has control over the mess the two of you make.

His desk. It will make much more of a mess and will make a chaos out of his paperwork, but he is a sucker for the view of you sprawled out on his desk.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Levi is actually pretty hard to seduce, which makes flirting with him really hard. He notices the flirting, of course, but is good at ignoring it. As already mentioned, he gets pretty turned on when you get dressed into your boots and gear.

Whenyou spend the day apart from eachother, glancing at each other from a distance, waiting for the night to finally come.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Degrading: Apart from public belief, Levi would NEVER degrade you because he hates being degraded so much. His whole life has been a pain so far, so why should he take this into the bedroom, where he just wants to show his partner his love?

He would also not hurt you. Maybe a few spanks or some very light choking and hair pulling, but he would never ever hurt you in any way. Same reason as above.

Don’t. Call. Him. Daddy. He thinks this is super weird. Just stay with his name or Heichou/Captain.

Anything including piss or feces. Just no.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Levi highly enjoys receiving oral, especially when he is sitting and you on your knees in fron of him. When you blow him, he will finally let loose and you can see his face slightly being tinted red, eyes closed, lips a little apart. His hand will be in your hair all the time and towards the end he cannot hold back and will thrust into your mouth once or twice. His low grunts get a little more high pitched when you run your tongue around his tip.

But Levi is also pretty talented in giving. As mentioned before, he likes to tease you with his mouth, loving the feeling of you squirming beneath him. Be prepared for a lot of edging, cause that little gremlin is a sucker for your desperate moans.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Levi is a little more on the rougher side. His thrusts are deep and strong, his pace rather “average” at the start, but he gets faster in the course of the act. If the two of you have some time, he will vary his rhythm, from slow and sensual to fast and strong, and back again. Quickies will be, as the name suggest, as quick as possible.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Oh, talking about quickies: If you are in a relationship with Levi or anything like this, quickies will happen very often. He is a busy man und you most likely will also be part of the survey corps, so you need to use every little space of time you can get. This often results in steamy sessions in the forest against a tree, or a more private session in his office.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

So, semi public sex, like in the forest, is a thing. But he would always make sure to not get caught, especially not by some cadets.

Apart from that, he is pretty open in bed. Tell him what you would like to try and he will most likely agree, as long as it is nothing from his no go list. If he picks up something new (thanks to Hanji most probably) he will also not shy away from bringing it up and ask you about it.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Oh boi, we are talking about Levi. When the two of you have a whole night, you have to be the one to stop him at some point - for your own sake. Levi can go for several rounds, even the whole night and this can easily be too much for someone without special power.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

So let’s imagine a more modern setting, because I think there are no sex toys in our common sense on Paradise Island. In a modern world, Levi would definitely get and try out some sex toys, especially vibrators which he could use on his partner. He would also be a little curious to try them out on himself, but he rather uses them for teasing you. He would have like 2 or 3 items, not too much, not too fancy.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Ohhh, be prepared for a lot of teasing. Levi enjoys to have a little power over you and your pleasure, and he will make use of it. He is especially unfair when it comes to oral, holding your hips in place while he is taking is sweet time to pleasure you. It drives you mad and this man has a lot of patience.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Levi is not really loud, but his soft little grunts and moans are like music. He only gets a little louder when you tease him while giving him head, but he will also scold you for it. That shitmouth. Otherwise, you will hear him whisper “fuck” and “shit” while he is pounding into you and coming close to his climax.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Levi is quite curious when it comes to new techniques. Soon after joining the squad, he discovers that Hanji has quite an interesting collection of books with...a lot of explanations and images. So one day, he asks them to borrow some of these books to study them. But before, he threatens Hanji with death if they tell anyone.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Have you seen Levi’s season 4 arts? This man is packed, damn. Errected I would say he is between 7′0 and 8′0. So Levi’s dick is pretty average in girth, but long. He knows how to use it as good as he uses his swords.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Levi’s sex drive is pretty low, since he is not a horny teen anymore. Of course, he feels the need from time to time, but he can pretty good control himself. When he is in a relationship, however, his sex drive will grow a lot, since it is one of the ways of showing you how much he loves you. If the two of you have time, you will easily have sex 3 or 4 times a week.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Levi only sleeps 3 hours per night, and this will not change after sex. He often holds you until you are asleep and gets up afterwards, to either sleep at his desk or do some paperworks. He will, however, make sure to be back in bed when you wake up.

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