#also this is the post that I wrote out and then tumblr crashed before I could post it (which I complained about on my main blog lol)

[tainsan]

misfits (college!ateez x reader)

When your world comes crashing down, the only people who are able to comfort you are the notorious group, Ateez. You’ve heard rumour after rumour about the eight males who are ice cold, yet for some reason, they are the warmest people you know.

Please read me: {hello! so finally i have wrote enough for me to release the first chapter and i really hope it is good enough for the lovely people who have been patiently waiting. there will be more chapters to come in the future so please do look forward to them! just so you all know there is a few trigger warnings i have to go through so just in case you are uncomfortable with certain subjects to read with caution and with your own comfort in mind. at the start of every chapter i will put the warnings that correlate with the said chapter. in this story there are topics of swearing, depression, anxiety, ptsd, suicide, negelection and mental abuse. so if you are not comfortable reading these please either avoid this story or read with extreme caution. your wellbeing is more important than anything. 

Now like i said in my previous post, this is going to be a poly!ateez story so hence there will be future smut and suggestive themes (which i will also put in the warnings before the chapter starts) but the message in the story is very much about past trauma and finding people who can help, heal and love you despite your imperfections.

With that all said! I hope you enjoy the first chapter of ‘Misfits’ and thank you kindly for waiting. 

do not steal my work or repost on places other than tumblr. 

with thanks to @musicdork and @moraxology for the help and ideas shared with me. thank you <3

-----THIS IS AN 18+ FANFICTION MINORS DO NOT INTERACT-----

Misfits, Chapter 1

⇢ masterlist ⇠ 

⇢ next chapter

warnings: anxiety attack, swearing, mentions of a house fire.

word count: 8.8k

Heart dropping to your stomach, you attempt to make sense of the words that are displayed on the small illuminating screen sat in front of you. Devastation hits you like a ton of bricks as you realise once again, it feels like the world is trying to punish you. Reading over the email once again, you let out an exasperated groan and let your head fall down onto your arms relaxing on the table.

“You’re homeless?” Your best friend almost screeches, scanning over the email present on your small laptop screen. 

“Okay a little louder Jisung and the aliens on the Saturn will fucking hear you,” You react, your voice muffled by your clothes.

“What happened? I thought your place was in one of the nicer areas?” 

Looking up from the desk, you see Jisung peering at you with a concerned expression.

“Do you remember those new tenants that moved in below me?” you ask, causing Jisung to nod his head, "Well they accidentally started a fire, and it burnt down half of the place because the owners weren’t smart enough to install fire hydrants around the residence.

“Isn’t it illegal to not have designated fire hydrants in a building?” 

“Probably, I mean that’s what I get for going for the cheapest available housing I could find, they say it's going to take at least a year to repair the damage.”

"Are all of your belongings okay?" 

"Not really, I managed to save most things like my books and some clothes but everything else is burnt. They say they are going to give me some money back for the damage, but I doubt it’ll be much."

"Then where are you staying now?"

"Yeji said I could stay with her for a few days, but she has a roommate moving in soon, so I have to get out before the end of this week."

"You have to start looking for a place to live __, I wish I could help you," 

Jisung lives with his boyfriend and friends in great student accommodation, there are only four rooms, yet they manage to fit eight grown men in there. Sadly, there's simply not enough space for another person.

“I’m aware of that, but all the school properties are full, and I’ve seen no flyers from people searching for roommates. There’s no way I'm looking for housing outside of the area, I would have to sell both my kidneys to afford a month's worth of rent. This apartment was the only place that was in my budget if I didn't want a roommate. At this point, I should probably start looking for a nice cosy bridge to live under.” 

Jisung lets out a stifled laugh before quickly covering his mouth realising the two of you are residing in a library. Being in a secluded area, noise isn’t really a problem, yet three other people are sitting near you, resting on the opposite side of the large wooden table. Two huddled next to each other, sharing a laptop, likely watching YouTube and one with striking blonde hair resting his head on his arms, undoubtedly sleeping.

“How many days until you have to move out?” Jisung inquires, laying his head on his hand and gazing at you. 

“Uh, I think like a week,” 

“Oh, so it’s not like you have to move out right now,” your best friend replies, a calm smile covering his features.

“Yeah, but I doubt that somebody is abruptly going to need a roommate out of nowhere,” 

Then, you hear rustling, then suddenly the guy who was sleeping on your table abruptly stands up, grabs his things, and rushes out of the library. 

“Probably had a nightmare or something,” Jisung chuckles, lighting up your mood.

“When’s your next lesson?” You ask, hoping he doesn't have to leave too soon. 

Observing as Jisung whips out his phone and looks at the time, he lets out a sigh.

“Starts in seven minutes, it takes like five minutes to walk there. I better get going,” Jisung replies, grabbing his books and laptop.

“Must you leave so soon? You can’t leave me here to tutor for three hours straight.” You let out a fake cry and hang onto his arm, pleading for him to stay. 

“You're the one who wanted the extra credit, don't blame me!” 

Bickering for a minute more, you eventually let Jisung get to his class, the two others across the table departing as well, leaving you alone.

Grumbling to yourself, you wonder why you even offered to tutor people, the extra credit is little to nothing. Alas, it’s too late to back out now as you have two people arriving soon. Typically, you only take people who you know personally, but Jisung’s boyfriend, Minho, said two of his classmates requested him to ask you to tutor, telling him they really needed assistance in maths. You hope they are pleasant because you are not about to be spending the next three hours with two arseholes.

You also typically only take one person at a time but due to your current tight schedule, you decided to just do two at once. You need the time later to look for new places to live anyway. The unknown two needed teaching in the same subject at least, works out fine.

Returning to your laptop you start typing, trying to finish as much of your lab report as you can before they show up.

“No Yeosang said she was around this corner.” 

A hushed voice breaks you out of your concentration, yet you pay no interest and hurriedly get back to typing.

“You’re __ right?” A monotone voice speaks out from your left.

You turn upon hearing your name and see a guy standing next to where you are sitting. Quickly you scan over his face, noticing the way his cheeks display small dimples as his face shifts and the slit in one of his eyebrows.

“I’m San, Minho told you about us, right?” 

Noting the way he said ‘us’, you turn fully backwards and see a noticeably built man standing by San, his face holding little to no emotion as he stares blankly towards you. In your mind, you hope these aren’t the two you are tutoring, noticing how intimidating their presence is.

“We are here for tutoring lessons,” the unnamed person speaks, and you curse upon your luck.

“Oh right, you can take a seat where you’d like.”

You mentally cuss out Minho for not informing you about how intense and handsome his classmates were, you let out a scoff under your breath as you start to pull out your maths textbooks.

“So, what were your guy's names, I’m not too good with names so if I forget, please don't take it personally,” you shyly confess, hoping they are not going to take it the wrong way. You detect the way some sort of stunned expression goes across their faces, but it disappears as soon as it had appeared.

“I’m Choi San, good to meet you.” San nods in your direction, his emotions still unreadable, a subtle glare still present along his features.

“San, I see. You too,” You mumble, slightly scared by his strong character. You attempt a small smile and shake his hand, trying to ignore the way you feel his eyes boring into your skull. Moving your attention to the man sitting next to him, you smile gently, noticing the way his cheeks are dusted with a light pink colour.

“Choi Jongho,” He reaches out his hand and you gladly take it, feeling slightly less intimidated by the seemingly kinder man.

Replying with your own name, you realise they already knew it, making you curse yourself for the sheer awkwardness emitting from your body as you notice Jongho and San are neither looking at you.

Slightly glancing up at you, San notices your flustered state and a faint smile ghosts his face.

Shaking off your clumsiness rapidly, you start to focus on the task at hand.

“So, what are you two looking to go over today?” you ask, opening your notebook that was conveniently placed in front of you. What you don’t expect is Jongho and San immediately look at each other with wide eyes, almost as if they are taken aback by the question.

“You guys don’t know what you want to go over?” 

“No, sorry, we have been having problems with our two recent algebra assignments.” Jongho replies, his tough exterior cracking ever so slightly as he ruffles his black hair. 

“Okay then,” you answer, a little puzzled at the two's sudden and strange gestures, yet you pay no mind to it as you reach into your backpack to grab your mathematics textbook. You’ve seen much stranger things in this college anyway.

When you proceed with the session you are surprised by the two men sitting in front of you. Although being very intimidating, the two are very good listeners and attentive to everything you say or do. Writing notes and nodding at almost every word you say. After an extensive explanation, you let Jongho and San try to solve a practice question. During this time, you take the time to admire the two in front of you. You can see they are extremely close by the way their bodies face each other naturally, and the way they look at each other. Meanwhile, you can’t help but wonder why you haven't seen them on campus before. Certainly, you would've heard or seen something about these two very good-looking men, knowing how much the people here like to gossip. Well after all, you have never been one for gossip and fangirling over the popular campus heartthrobs. Brushing your thoughts to the side, you start to read over the same page for the fifth time.

After the second hour, it intrigues you how smart they are, only needing you to once go over something and they already have the answer or even occasionally you swear you see one of them write an answer without you describing how to find it. Perhaps they are fast learners? Due to the fact, they are so quick, it only takes two of the three hours for you to cover everything they wished to go over, and their assignments are almost finished, just needing the final touches.

"There we go,” you exclaim, stretching your arms over your head, letting out a content groan as you let your back straighten up, "if you need future help, you can always call me." Even though it’s perhaps pretentious to offer this to such tough guys, you’re happy to be able to have such good students who actually listen. Unlike your last session which you spent way too many hours on.

Jongho looks up from his laptop with a wide eye look, "that’d be helpful," 

"Can you take my number?" San holds his hand open, expecting your phone and you are shocked at his utter forwardness. Even though you know it’s not intended in a flirtatious way, your heart quickens at the gesture, never having been asked for your number before. 

Passing your phone to the male in front of you, you notice San observing the Sanrio stickers stuck to the back of it. The male lets out a short burst of air through his nose, and you don’t know whether he’s mocking you or scoffing. As you look at him to analyse his reaction, you see a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips, but it doesn’t seem in a taunting way. You continue staring at him as he puts his number into your phone.

Unexpectedly he looks up and straight into your investigating eyes, catching you by surprise, immediately looking away from him and at the open book in front of you pretending to read it, even though you know he knows you have already read over the page multiple times in the past ten minutes.

“Wait, what time is it?" Jongho asks San. Watching San pull out his phone, you see a glimpse of his phone case, it looks something like a character, but you can’t see it as he places his phone face up on the table.

"Quarter to twelve," San responds, his phone screen lighting up for a split second, you manage to catch a quick sight of his lock screen. It appears to be a group photo, with numerous faces smiling brightly at the camera. So, they have more friends.

"We have about thirty minutes till ecology, do you want to go to the canteen?" Jongho questions as he begins to put his belongings into his bag. 

"I could use a snack,” San answers, stretching back into the chair, his arms above his head just as you did earlier.

"Coming with us?" Jongho asks as he stands up from his chair and pushes it back beneath the table.

Bewildered by the question, you wonder as to why they want you to come when they have been nothing but distant this entire time. Glancing back at your unfinished lab report displayed on your laptop, you feel conflicted. Yet a break from the tedious work would be rather nice. There's no harm in pulling another all-nighter.

"I could also do with something to eat," Your smile is bright as you stuff your laptop into your bag, happy to have a reason to escape the tedious work on the small screen of your laptop. 

It is a rather fast walk to the canteen; it is conveniently on the same wing as the library. Expecting the canteen to be full to the brim of students getting lunch, you’re surprised to see the canteen completely empty. You are rather pleased with the serenity of the canteen, feeling at ease that there are no judging eyes watching your every move. Pacing over to the cooled section of food, your footsteps echo in the large room, then you notice San and Jongho trailing after you, looking quite lost. 

"Have you guys never been to the canteen before or something?" You inquire, chuckling at their antics before grabbing a carton of banana milk and an apple.

"It's not particularly our scene, we eat our meals at our place." San answers, staring down at the banana milk in your hand. So, they live together, it makes sense seeing how close they are.

“You guys don't live in student buildings?” You question, that does explain why you've never seen them around, knowing most people who reside in the student dorms. You resume walking towards a table to sit, you grab two more banana milk before sitting down and popping a straw into your drink.

"No, we live near the new park, Eastwood Drive," Jongho replies.

This information almost makes you spit out your drink. Eastwood is not only part of a huge real estate area but one of the richest areas near our school. Absolutely no students would be able to afford that. It's an area full of houses like mansions or condos bigger than a regular house.

"Are you okay?" Jongho asks, hurriedly rushing to your side and patting your back, San chuckles at the scene and passes you a bottle of water from his seat. 

"Yes, I'm fine," You say between coughs, "thank you," you take a gulp of water from the bottle before handing it back to him.

"Sorry it's just, how on earth do you afford that house there's no way you guys just have it. Did you have to sell your soul to the devil or something?" 

Both males let out soft laughs and for the first time you see something other than scowls on their faces, instead replaced by gentle amusement.

"No, we didn't, one of our roommates' mothers is the owner of the real estate and she lets us live there," San answers your question.

"We do still have to pay rent, which is above average, but it's not anything like the rent we would have to pay if we were actually living there," Jongho adds, "plus we have quite a few roommates, so it's spread out pretty evenly." So, they have multiple roommates.

"I see," you hum as you let the information in. Of course, they have several roommates, the house is big enough for ten people, most likely. 

"And you?" Jongho questions looking at you. His expression is back to his resting face, until he realises his question, eyes going wide he continues, “not in a creepy, I'm sorry please don't take it the wrong way!" he rambles on. 

Laughing out, you wave your hands in a friendly way to dismiss his thoughts.

"No no, it's okay," you chuckle, not really sure how to explain to them that your house was recently made into a fresh stock of charcoal.

“It's kind of complicated I'll be honest," you start, San and Jongho’s expressions twitch in curiosity, "Well I was living at Coast Lane," 

"Oh, the one near the shopping centre?" Jongho inquires. You nod your head back in confirmation.

"Wait but wasn't that place burnt down a few days ago?" San asks, looking at Jongho and then back at you with a worried look. Their hearts fill with worry for you.

"Yep," you say, popping the p at the end, "that's why I said I was living," you say looking down, chucking dryly.

"Where are you living now then?" San asks, his voice laced with something similar to worry. 

"I'm staying at a friend's house, but they are getting a new roommate at the end of this week, so I need to move out by then." 

"Have you found anywhere to live yet?" Jongho questions, looking sorrowful. You are surprised by the amount of worry you suddenly feel from San and Jongho. However, you shake your head as 'no' and proceed to take another sip of your drink. 

"I have an idea." San abruptly says standing up from his chair, catching your and Jongho's attention, "Excuse me I have to talk to someone, Jongho. Joong." 

Jongho's eyes light up with some sort of awareness and he also rapidly stands from his chair, leaving you even more confused, unsure where the sudden energy comes from, you also wonder who the fuck 'Joong' is and why do they need to see him so suddenly. 

"See you soon, __.” Jongho’s smile is warm and contagious, he then turns to leave with the taller man.

"Wait, guys!” You exclaim, "here," you hand them both a cartoon of banana milk that you grabbed earlier. "Drink these, you can't focus if you're dehydrated, " you say, heat rising up from your chest. 

Both of the men look at you shocked at the kind gesture, surprised someone actually cares about their well-being. Giving you a thank you, the two men leave with red subtly covering their cheeks, both trying to immediately force it away before someone sees them with a giddy expression.

 ----

"Then they just stood up and left," You replay the events from earlier today to Jisung, who is sipping on a mojito. After the busy day you both shared, Jisung and you decided to go to a bar that recently opened not too far from campus. It is small and cosy, not too full of people, mostly students from your school rewinding from the day, just like you.

"Psycho behaviour," Jisung jokes whilst you take a sip of your drink. Laughing, you push Jisung's arm gently.

"I don't know, they were certainly intimidating but I could tell they were okay people," you exclaim truthfully. If you said that the three hours you spent with the two weren't pleasant you’d be lying.

"Do you have a crush on them or something?" Jisung inquires, rather loudly, getting far too excited. Hoping that no one heard him through the low jazz music resounding in the small bar, you quieten down your best friend quickly by covering his mouth with your free hand.

"Ji the entire bar does not need to know about my personal endeavours, and no I do not have a crush on them, they are just simply cute," you say exasperated.

“So, you do find them cute! The last time you had a crush as back in high school, this is big news,”

“There is no news dumbass, they are just cute. I find kittens cute, and I don’t want to date them.”

Jisung’s face contorts into a mixture of disgust and humour.

"Wait, what are their names?" Jisung questions his voice back to a reasonable volume.

"Choi San and Choi Jongho, I've never even heard of them, to be honest. You'd think I would've seen these handsome men bef, what is with that look on your face?" you stop your ramble as you see the very obviously shocked look on Jisung's face. 

"Are you fucking serious?" Jisung says slowly.

Confused, you simply answer, "yeah they needed help with maths. it was your boyfriend who set the tutor session up."

"Yeah, because they probably threatened him?" Jisung says tensing up.

"What do you mean threatened, they were huge sweethearts," you say amused at Jisung. Your laughing momentarily halts when you see the serious look on Jisung's small face.

"What is it?" 

"___, Choi San and Choi Jongho are part of that group." 

Your baffled expression remains on your features, clearly unfazed by this information.

"What is that like a cult or something?" you joke.

"Girl, are you living under a fucking rock? Ateez, the group called Ateez. The super scary ones practically haunt this school. I'm surprised they talked to Minho. I'm pretty sure he's going to be scarred now."

Slowly but surely, your brain starts to put things into place.

"Wait, that group Sola told us about?”

As Jisung confirms your question, you feel the hairs on the back of your neck rise. A few months ago, you had been told by some classmates about them briefly, they were talking rather loudly about them. Apparently, they had done some terrible things when they were in high school then just disappeared for a few years. Most people thought they dropped out or moved abroad. The year they returned, they started this university out of nowhere together and have been a notorious group ever since, being known for staying foul and bitter towards everyone except themselves. Yet, nobody seems to know the reason for their ice-cold hearts. You never really bothered to keep up with the rumours or gossip, it wasn’t necessary for you to know, however you start to think maybe you should pay more attention due to your recent interaction with two of the people in the group.

"But they were nice?" your question, more to yourself than to Jisung.

"I don't know about you, but you probably got the wrong people." 

You don't believe Jisung is lying but at the same time… The two men you had tutored earlier today were definitely not members of the notorious group. 

Surely not. 

Yes, they were intimidating, but nowhere near as bad as anything people say about them. From what you've heard about the group, they are cold, heartless, selfish, and miserable. Staying only in the group of eight, others not even daring to look them in the eyes as they pass them.

"If they were the people that you were tutoring yesterday, you may have gotten yourself into something you can't get out of. They have hundreds of fangirls, who are very possessive over them and people who want them dead. I don’t know of a single person who is fond of them. It’s best if you stay far away from them." Jisung says with a nervous expression. 

Unexpectedly, his phone lights up and you see Minho's caller ID appear. Jisung glances back up at you with a questioning look, requesting if he can take it.

"Go ahead," you push your smile and watch as he leaves to find a quiet place.

Your heart beats heavily against your chest and you feel your throat tighten. ‘Come on’ you think, this isn't the best place for you to have an anxiety attack. Possibly, it's that the new information is far too overwhelming. You are barely keeping up with your classes, your apartment just burnt down, and now you’re somewhat engaged with an apparently dangerous group that has no good stories. Feeling your breathing getting jagged and your heart getting heavier by the second, you attempt to focus on your breathing. Trying to remember the breathing exercises your mother taught you when you were younger, you attempt breathing in deeply, but it doesn't work, leaving you to breathe in and out in a fast manner. It's okay, it's okay. You repeat yourself, in an attempt to comfort yourself, but your brain is yelling 'it's not okay, look how stupid you've been and got yourself into a senseless situation again. Fucking idiot'. You put your head in your hands and start gently rocking on the barstool, tears threatening to fall out of your eyes. Unexpectedly, a presence appears next to you and before you know it, their warm hand is rubbing up and down your back in a soothing manner. 

"Shh it's okay, it's all going to be okay." a deep voice speaks from your right. You don't care to look up, only basking in the way the figure's hand caresses your back in a comforting way. To your surprise, it works miracles. Your breathing is back to a reasonable state within the next minute. Only then do you look up from your hands, your eyes lock with a beautiful man. He wears a comforting smile, his eyes full of sympathy and something else you can't quite put your finger on, his hand not slowing on your back. Trying to smile back at him, you wipe the tears you didn't even know had fallen, with the sleeves of your sweatshirt before regaining the words to speak.

"I'm sorry you had to see that," you say, abruptly embarrassed that a very handsome man just had to see a small breakdown of yours. 

"It's perfectly okay. I've had enough anxiety attacks to know you can't control where you have them." the man admits, scratching the back of his neck with an awkward smile on his face. The voice of the man is deep, yet soft, making you feel awfully relaxed.

"You have anxiety?" you ask, sniffling your nose.

The man chuckles and looks down at his hands, "longer than I can remember, yeah," he looks back up at you, "rubbing my back is how my friends comfort me, so I hope it somewhat worked for you too." 

"It worked amazingly, it's actually how my mother used to comfort me," you express, still slightly ashamed to be sharing this information with a stranger, let alone such a good-looking one. Yet knowing he goes through the same things as you, comforts you more than you realise. The male looks around him, almost as if he’s worried someone will see him, he then looks back down to your smaller figure which is closer to him than he remembered. Clearing his throat, he steps away a little bit, concerned you would feel uncomfortable with the closeness of your bodies. 

“I do need to go now, but it was nice to meet you," The man says whilst leaving the barstool to your right. Not sure why, but you feel sad that he has to leave so soon. Feeling so relaxed around a stranger has you shocked, wishing you could stay with this unknown feeling.

"Thank you," you say, grateful to have him there for you.

"Anytime.”

"I’ll see you around." You return his smile.

Nodding his head, he gives one last smile before departing the bar's exit, a growing smile adorning his features as he exits the bar.

“Hey I’m back.”

Whipping your head to the left, you see Jisung sitting back in his stool. Opening your mouth to tell him about what just happened, you attempt to get the words out but for some reason, you are unable to find the words. Not wanting to worry your best friend with your sudden onset anxiety attack, you decide to stay quiet.

What are these unexplainable encounters you've been having with handsome men recently?

----

Climbing over bags and coats, you find a seat in a calmer area of the stadium you just arrived at. Spotting Minho in the field doing some warm-ups with his team, you feel relaxed to see someone you know. When he sees you, he waves happily. Smiling, you reach for your phone to quickly text Jisung asking where he is. All of a sudden, a rush of cold air gets swept in by the wind, causing you to freeze up. Never liking the cold, you debate heavily at this moment whether you should just leave. However, you travelled all the way from Yeji’s to here in the cold. It seems like a waste to just go back, even if it freezes you to death to stay. After all, you need to support Minho, him being one of your only friends, for the football game. Jisung is supposed to be joining you but you’re sure he's busy picking out a cute outfit to swoon Minho. 

Over the past few days Jisung has been trying to teach you the names of Ateez so you know to run if they approach you. Seemingly stupid, but you do need fewer distractions in the hope to graduate with honours. From what Jisung has told you, there are eight members, and they are all of similar age, the youngest being in the same classes as he managed to skip a year due to him exceeding the level of people his age. However, Jisung teaching you their names doesn’t really stick to you, never being good at names it doesn’t help that you don’t know what they look like. It would be much easier learning their names if you actually had photos so you can put a name to a face, but of course they don’t have Instagram accounts, and if they saw people taking photos of them, they’d likely murder you on the spot. Or that’s what Jisung says.

You are suddenly brought out of your thoughts when a voice sounds in your ears.

“Could I sit here?” a soft, yet deep captivating voice speaks out. 

Curiously, you look to your left to see who the owner of the voice is. Surprisingly, you see a blonde male with a mask covering his face. He is standing next to the seat where you have placed your bag, and you realise he is asking for the seat.

“Oh yes, of course, sorry,” you hurriedly grab your bag and place it between your legs, allowing the male to take a place next to you.

“Thank you,” he says, a very small smile on his lips. When he sits down, he takes off his mask, and you glance at him one more time, taking in his visuals. With his fluffy hair and red tinted cheeks and a small mark of pink next to one of his eyes, he is truly a work of art. Yet, for some reason, you can't help but feel like you've seen him before.

“I'm sorry have I met you before, you seem really familiar?” you ask inquisitively, not being able to match a name to a face.

“We may have run into each other once or twice,” the blonde male puts his hand out for a handshake.

Gladly taking his hand in yours, you shake with a small smile on your face.

“It is a small world, I'm __.” 

The male takes his hand away and back into his coat pocket, shivering in the icy air.

“Are you Jisung's girlfriend?” he questions.

Rolling your eyes, slightly annoyed at the question, you go to answer. It has been thousands of times that people have asked about your and Jisung's relationship, mistaking you for a couple and not just a couple of friends. After a while it gets rather irritating, the question being asked countless amounts of times.

"No, we aren't, we are just best friends, I'm pretty sure Jisung came out as gay like two years ago. Plus, he's literally dating the quarterback, Lee Minho." you chuckle slightly.

"Oh sorry! I didn't mean to offend you in any way." 

"No! It's really okay, it's just I get asked a lot, so it becomes annoying after a while. I mean look at Jisung, he has baby girl written all over him." 

“Cold?” he questions.

The blondie next to you lets out a small chuckle acknowledging the man you are always with isn’t your boyfriend.

Sensing a gaze on you, you turn back to the blonde male whose eyes are looking at the goosebumps on your exposed arms.

“I probably should’ve brought at least a jumper. I've been so wrapped up with exams and tutoring I’ve been forgetting everything,” you say, laughing slightly, embarrassed that you went outside wearing just a t-shirt in the middle of November.

The male lets out a laugh before speaking, “it’s okay, I understand. If I’m being honest, I've also been having so much struggle with studying, my stress is all over the place.” He wonders for a second why he even shared this with you, concerned for a second you will see him in a bad light.

“I'm sorry to hear that.” you contemplate for a moment, “Look I have these if you want,” reaching into your pocket, you grab some rescue drops. “These help me a lot,”

You place the small bottle in his hand, and a giant smile covers his face. “What? I’ve actually been looking for these everywhere and I can never find them! They’ve been sold out in every shop.” Blondie looks back up at you, “but you have anxiety you need these more than me,” 

Pausing for a second, you wonder how he knows you have anxiety, nonetheless, you continue “It’s perfectly fine, Jisung’s parents work at a pharmacy back in my hometown and they send me a few of these whenever they are in stock, you can keep them.” you inform him, his smile brightening your cold mood shockingly fast. You’re not even sure why you gave him them, it was your last bottle. You guess that’s what happens when you are a people pleaser. The smile on the male’s face only grows wider, his heart jumping at your kind action.

“Thank you so much __,”

“It’s no worries, if you ever need some more, look for the loud group of small guys acting like four-year-olds.” you laugh, and he chuckles along with you, making a mental note, even though he knows he will likely never approach the group.

Before you can focus back on the starting game, you feel a soft material cover your shivering body. It is a large zip-up that smells of rich, sweet perfume. Turning quickly to the blonde guy with confusion covering your features, you hurriedly dismiss the action, seeing his arms exposed to the winter air.

“I can’t take this; you’ll get too cold.” you stop your words as he pulls out another sweater from his bag. 

“I've got my friend’s sweater, you keep mine until you’re warm.” he turns to face the game, "or until Jisung sees and freaks out and tells everyone you have a secret boyfriend." he jokes.

“You seem to know Jisung?” you ask, wondering how he knows Jisung’s personality quite well.

“Well, we know each other, but we aren’t particularly friends,” blondie turns fully towards you, “are you sure you don’t know me at all?”

“I'm sorry but I really only have like two friends, I don't really go out.” 

“But Jisung is super popular, aren't you in his huge partying friend group?”

“Not really, his friends are lovely but I’m only close with him and his boyfriend, I'm not too good at making friends.” you quietly mumble the last part. You look over at the blondie and see he has slight confusion on his face.

“You are so kind, I’m sure anyone would want to be your friend." 

"You’d be the first to think that" you dryly admit, which causes the male to feel a twinge of pain and guilt in his heart, "I would rather stay inside all-day binge-watching television whilst eating away my stress,"

"Well, that’s one thing we have in common." 

Sharing a warm smile with him, you start to get lost in your thoughts again, but then you realise a question you never returned.

“I’m so sorry I never got your name.”

“No worries, I’m Yeosang.” he has the same smile on his face, making you feel warm despite the bitter winter air. Then his familiarity dawns on you.

“Kang?” you inquire, your voice rising ever so slightly.

“That’s me,” he smiles at me, and you don't know if your heart rises because of how beautiful his smile is or because you recognise the name from Jisung’s teaching session with the members of Ateez.

“Like from Ateez,” you question, watching your words, if Ateez is as bad as Jisung is saying then you definitely need to watch your words.

Yeosang turns to you, almost looking baffled.

“I thought you didn't know about Ateez?” he questions, shocked.

“What made you think that?”

“Just a guess I suppose, being that you don't really go out I assumed you weren’t really interested in the groups and stuff.” 

“Ah well not particularly, but recently I suppose I’ve gotten to know about it better.”

“You're not scared, are you?” you see Yeosang tense up a little, his eyebrows furrowed. He hopes for the best, not knowing how you will react. Surprisingly, your heart softens at this question, he seems upset for some reason, as if he doesn't want to be seen this way. You feel bad for ever acting stressed towards him.

“Don't worry, the only person that scares me is Jisung when he's hungry.” you joke out, relaxing the tension and calming him. From what you can see, Yeosang is just kind and calm. The only thing that's menacing about him is the fact he’s drop-dead gorgeous.

Yeosang lets out a small chuckle, “well I guess now I know I need to avoid Jisung if he’s hungry,”

You agree with the blonde man, whilst lightly laughing.

“Wait, but why are you watching? Aren’t you supposed to be on the pitch?” You ask him, confused, remembering Jisung informing you that Yeosang is a part of one of the school's football teams, along with someone else whose name you can’t remember at the moment. For a moment Yeosang’s chest fills with pride, knowing you know something about him.

“Someone is taking my spot today, I was told to analyse the opposing team to find out their habits and stuff, hence the notepad.”

Looking down, you notice the small notepad with doodles all over the cover, making your heart swell. Yeosang continues to talk,

“Don’t tell my tactics to Minho,” he jokes with a grin on his face, knowing Minho is on the other team.

“I would never betray you like that,” you place your hand over your chest acting offended. 

Both cracking up, you speak up again, “don't worry, your secrets are safe with me.”

“Sang!” You hear a voice call from the left, and your eyes lay on another attractive man, “Coach told us to sit with him,” this male also has a notepad in his grip. 

You know this guy. He works in a small café not too far from campus, it is down a narrow alleyway, covered by vines and moss. It was a very hidden spot and only locals really knew the place. Only knowing it because you walked past it every day for a year as the alleyway was a shortcut to your housing from the campus. Barely anyone goes there, the regulars being either old women or businesspeople quickly rushing in to get a coffee before work starts. Back at the beginning of the semester, you used to go to the café a lot because of the raspberry muffins, yet they stopped selling them thus forth you stopped going as much. It was also due to the fact you had barely any time to sleep, so you cut it out of your morning schedule to be able to sleep in a little. You think the guy’s name was Wooyoung if you can remember his name tag correctly. You notice he sees you sitting next to Yeosang, with his friend’s hoodie over your shoulders and a smile consumes his entire face. 

“Muffin?” he looks confused, yet somewhat glad to see you once again. The nickname extremely takes you aback. “Why did you stop coming to the café?”

As far as you can recall, back when you visited the café, this server was rather distant and limited to saying little to no words whilst waiting. Seeing him like this confuses you severely. Alas, you let out a giggle and both of the boys' grins widen visibly.

“You two better get going, I'm not sure your coach wants to wait any longer.” 

Yeosang stands up and straightens out his pants before turning to you,

“Hopefully I’ll see you around.” he smiles warmly. Smiling back at him, you nod. Yeosang starts to leave with Wooyoung before he turns around.

“I better see you at the café tomorrow! Plus, that sweater looks good on you, Muffin.” he winks and Yeosang slaps the back of his head.  You can’t help but giggle yet feel flustered. 

Yeosang and Wooyoung walk towards the coach’s section, Yeosang slightly more affected than the male next to him. Hopefully he will get his hoodie back, and hopefully it will smell like you. After this interaction, your mind was even more confused. If you remember correctly, Yeosang and Wooyoung have a very big reputation for being some of the rudest and coldest towards people. Yet they were so friendly when you were with them. Is everything all these people are saying about them true or maybe the group of eight is just deeply misunderstood?

Whatever it is, you need to talk to Jisung about this, but you will wait until the game is over.

----

The night of the interaction between Yeosang and Wooyoung, Jisung, Minho and you reside at their apartment, eating chicken and watching a shitty romcom for background noise. The rest of his roommates are out celebrating the start of the football season. You have no idea why it started mid-way through November but okay.

“I said I would come; they were too sweet to say no to!” You exclaim, throwing your head back against the couch, regretting saying yes. 

“It was definitely Yeosang and Wooyoung?” Minho questions, not believing any part of my story.

“Yes! Yeosang has the birthmark next to his eye like Ji described and Wooyoung was the guy who works at that one café I used to go to all the time,”

“Well, I never knew Wooyoung worked at a café, that doesn't really match the hardcore scary image they are going for, are you sure you’re not going delusional?” Jisung admits, chuckling.

“What are you going to do?” Minho questions, passing you a drumstick. 

You take a big bite, before speaking, “I should just go, if I don't show up, they might murder me as you two say. Which is very unbelievable seeing how fucking cheerful they’ve all been.”

“Well, you’ve only met four, the rest are probably a nightmare,” Jisung says, his mouth full of chicken, Minho humming in agreement next to him.

“You two are supposed to be comforting me.” you groan, throwing your head into your hands. 

“Okay, don't worry __, if they have been as nice as you’ve been saying then just show up and if they aren't nice then call Chan and Changbin and I’m sure they will gladly sort them out for you.” Minho laughs.

 ----

Keeping your promise, you showed up at the café the next day. 

Opening the painted door, the bell rings notifying your entrance. Immediately you spot Wooyoung relaxing against the counter, scrolling through his phone, visibly bored. There are only a few people in the café, mostly reading books or typing on laptops. You see a flash of pink hair in the corner, yet you lose focus as quickly as you had it as you continue to walk further in.

“Welcome to Veranda Café,” Wooyoung says unbothered, still staring at his phone as you walk closer to where all the cakes were on display. Much to your dismay, you fail to see a raspberry muffin on display.

“I see you still don’t have any raspberry muffins.” You speak out in front of where Wooyoung is standing, making his head immediately snap up.

“__! I was starting to worry you weren't going to show up.” He exclaims, a contagious smile wide on his face. Immediately putting his phone in his pocket, giving his attention to you. He leans on the counter. Extremely happy you showed up.

“I never break my promises,” you grin at the black-haired man.

“Oh, one moment.” He speaks out excitedly, like a puppy, and turns to where he was sitting. Opening up a small fridge, he brings out the biggest, most beautiful raspberry muffin you have ever seen.

“Yeosang and I made this morning for you.” he gestures over to the corner, and you see the blonde male from yesterday, he is sitting next to someone, yet you can’t see them from where you’re standing. Yeosang shyly waves and you smile and wave back. Heart beating faster and cheeks warming up, you take the muffin happily. Wooyoung smiles brightly at you, feeling prideful at the way your eyes light up from the muffin.

“We stopped making these muffins because the owner didn’t think anyone was buying them, it made me upset because I knew you liked them,” Wooyoung says, making direct eye contact with you, making you weak at the knees. Wondering how he even remembered you, you still feel thankful he thought of you, even if it was a long time ago.

“It’s a shame but I'm sure there are lots of other tasty things here too. Anyways, thank you so much, you guys are the best.” you say, sincerity dripping in your words. Wooyoung just shrugs like he doesn't care, but the big smile on his face and the redness dusting his ears tells a different story.

“How much do I owe you?” you ask, getting out your purse.

Swiftly, Wooyoung grabs your hand halting its actions, “it’s on us, for being so kind, Yeosang and one of our friends really needed those rescue drops.” He lowers his voice, “between us, their anxiety has been really bad recently, and the stuff works wonders. Plus, you were always my favourite customer anyways.” Wooyoung admits, smiling, his cheeks get a deeper colour of red. Your heart warms up once again, which is strange to you. You haven't felt this happiness in a very long time. Maybe things are starting to get better. Happily taking the muffin, you make your way to Yeosang who is reading a book.

“Do you mind if I sit here?” you inquire, repeating his words from yesterday, yet when your eyes meet the figure sitting next to him, they light up as you recognise him.

“I know you!” You exclaim, a little too loudly, causing people around you to glare in your direction. Feeling overwhelmed by the sudden attention, you quickly sit down in a shielded area, away from all the glares. 

“You two know each other?” Yeosang asks, intrigued by your sudden remark.

“It is you, right?” you ask just in case you’re mistaking him for another pink-haired male.

The tall male smiles widely, “Yeah, it’s me. I’m Mingi,” he turns to Yeosang, who is visibly confused, “we met briefly in a bar the other day,” 

Yeosang lets out an ‘ah’ in realisation, yet you fail to see the jealous look he points at the pink haired man as he turns back to his book. Reaching for a dessert fork placed in the middle of the table, Mingi quickly grabs it and hands it to you. Quietly thanking him, you start to cut your muffin into four pieces. You acknowledge a gaze on you, so you halt your movements and look up, noticing Yeosang and Mingi’s eyes on you. Suddenly feeling awfully small, you start to feel your heartbeat rise and your breath deepen, never really liking people watching you eat, the stares from the two make you anxious. Luckily, they seem to immediately notice your change in behaviour and start apologising.

“I’m sorry, we will look away. We were just wondering whether you were going to like the muffin,” Mingi explains, his voice stumbling over words.

“It’s okay! I’m sorry, I’ve always been kind of awkward when people watch me eat.” you confess, your cheeks heating up. The two males nod trying to remember this information for the future. Instantly, the two men completely look away and focus on their own things, not paying any attention to you. Their antics make you giggle slightly, and you look back down at your muffin. Slowly, you pick up a quarter and place it on Mingi’s empty plate in front of him. You then do the same for Yeosang. They both look up at you with wide eyes.

“This is your favourite, we can't take it,” Yeosang says hurriedly, trying to put the cake back on your plate. 

“Stop, stop! I want to. I want to share it with my friends!” You blurt out before you can control your mouth. The wide eyes on both Yeosang and Mingi, make you realise what you said. You have to remember that even though they seem normal they are very clearly part of a group who apparently can kill people with their stare. What the hell are you doing? Of course, they aren’t your friends, you met them both once for less than ten minutes.

“Wait, I'm so sorry I didn't mean to say that I didn't intend to push your boundaries, we have only met like twice I didn't just assume we are friends!” You start to ramble, scared they will take it the wrong way, trying to fix your words as quickly as possible so you don’t get on their bad sides.

Before you can say anything more, Yeosang cuts you off by taking a bite of the muffin, “it tastes amazing! Thank you,”

“Woo!” Mingi’s voice calls out, ignoring the angry glares of people around him, “come get some cake!” Watching Wooyoung jump over the counter towards the three of you, you smile to yourself, glad you haven't done something that would cause future problems. Yeosang feeds Wooyoung the cake and makes an over-exaggerated reaction, “the flavours are melting on my tongue!” he exclaims in a funny voice, making Yeosang and Mingi cringe but you just laugh at his amusing antics. You can’t help but imagine how the whole group is when they are together. 

For the remainder of the hour, you are just conversing with Wooyoung and Mingi, sometimes Yeosang if he wants to add to the conversation, but more focusing on his book, yet looking up intently whenever you speak. You are broken out of your conversation as you hear the bell of the entrance ring, notifying the entrance of new customers. Wooyoung groans and stands up from his chair next to you. It seems to be three girls from our school. You recognise one of them from your calculus class.

Then the next thing that happens confuses you more than any other thing that has happened. As Wooyoung reaches the counter to take their order, his demeanour changes almost immediately, you would've missed it if you had blinked. 

Mingi and Yeosang seem to notice your confusion but blatantly ignore it, their smiles quickly disappearing from their faces. The atmosphere turns from warm and friendly to cold and foreign.

“What do you want?” Wooyoung asks bluntly. You furrow your eyebrows, confused out of your mind as to where the sweet friendly Wooyoung disappeared to.

“You know you should be nicer to your customers, it would help with business,” one of the girls speaks out, looking smug as if she has immensely hurt the man’s feelings.

“You should probably focus on your studies rather than going to cafes, sitting with a random document open and pretending to study when we all know you are miserably failing all your classes.” Wooyoung says monotone, whilst scrolling through his phone, not even looking at the three girls who now have shocked and offended looks on their faces. Some curses are thrown before the girls end up storming out of the café without even beginning to look at the menu. As soon as the girls leave, Wooyoung returns to the table nonchalantly, acting as if nothing had happened. Opening your mouth to say something, it gets caught in your throat before you get the words out.

Are you going insane?

{feedback is always appreciated and i love hearing from all of you. remember you are loved.} 

part two is out now!!!

[konuxkii]

ִ ࣪𖤐 𝙆𝙐𝙍𝙊𝙊 𝙏𝙀𝙏𝙎𝙐𝙍𝙊 𝙃𝙀𝘼𝘿𝘾𝘼𝙉𝙊𝙉𝙎

HELLO LOVES <3

A/N ; This is just a repost from my former account- I wanted to post something Haikyuu related since the release of the 'Dumpster Battle' movie and why not start with my favorite boy? This is also technically my first real post on this account so woohoo! Warnings : none other than Kuroo being a teasing bastard. Gender Neutral reader/y/n. Just fluff- Also this isn’t proofread because I happen to never proofread my shit so I apologize for any mistakes.

+ If you were the type of person to get embarrassed by what Kuroo considers 'cute things you do' he's never letting that situation/what happened go. Maybe he'll stop bringing it up and you're relieved that maybe he finally forgot and let it go- wrong. He remembers a lot of things especially about you silly + He’s just laughing it off whenever you start yelling at him. telling him not to talk about it and shut up or just your reactions in general whenever he brings up the “embarrassing situation” always makes him laugh. + Seriously, he's never letting it go. It'll be at a random time, random day, you two silently enjoying each others company or when you two are hanging out (with or without people around) and he'll just : "Hey y/n remember when you-" "NO. I don't- LET IT GO ALREADY" + He’d also try to tell other people about it like- “Oh yeah did I tell you? Y/n did the most hilarious thing yesterday! So they-” and you instantly drag him away or interrupt him by bringing up a new subject. And he’s just looking down at you snickering with that smug smile of his- + Aside from the topic of him loving to tease and embarrass you. Kuroo strikes me as the guy to LOVE physical affection and words of affirmation. He's constantly touching you or saying sweet things to you no matter what. When he's with you at school? Or really just anywhere in public. He's holding your hand or his hand rests on your waist/top of your head, or he's leaning down and resting his head on top of yours. He'd give you kisses on the forehead, hand, lips, cheek, anywhere and anytime. He does not care about PDA !! To an extent- + This also includes when you two are also just casually talking, you two are conversing about something dumb you did and he'll just sigh and shake his head with a smile before poking your forehead or cheek, or maybe pulling on your cheek while making fun of you for what you did. He just likes to poke at your face a lot during conversations actually. + He doesn't try to hide the fact he has a massive crush on you. He's constantly waiting outside your class right as it ends, leaning against the doorframe and looking at you with a smirk. He's not shy about the fact that he'll shamelessly send you winks from afar. Whether it's in class or cafeteria. If you pass by him in the hallway he'll look down at you with that smug smile and in that short period of time and greet you with a "Hey pretty/handsome" and then continue walking like it was nothing. + SOMETIMES a lot of times actually. You'll fluster him though without even realizing it. This is a common occurrence when you're staring at him, he'll blink at you for a moment, taking in your appearance..the way you looked at him, the way your eyes look, the way you slowly blink at him, the way- he'd stop is thoughts there before glancing away, trying to hide the blush on his cheeks before saying something about your staring to tease you.

Thank you for reading !!! I would’ve wrote more for the people who don't really get embarrassed (I envy you) or just more in general but tumblr kept crashing and I had to rewrite this like five times so- NO. I also ran out of ideas.. Anyways I'm accepting requests !! I write for JJK, CSM, HAIKYUU, TOKYO REV, and more !! No NSFW. Though I may be very late to requests so I apologize in advance...Have a lovely day / afternoon / night loves ♥

[barbwritesstuff]

Thicker Than - Weekly Update for KoFi Members

This week, I wrote the first part of the 'escape the city' route. You can see that choice is now unlocked at the end of Chapter Ten.

I also tweaked the the achievements (added a 'jack of all trades' achievement for those who aren't fans of min maxing), fixed a couple of outstanding bugs, and edited.

The big thing though is something I can't really show you just yet. I wrote an ending. Ending #2 to be precise. You can't read it because there's a bit leading into it that I wasn't able to finish this week. I thought I would, but my brain.exe file crashed and I wasn't able to write for a couple of days. I'm really sorry about that.

I'm going away this weekend with a couple of friends. Hopefully that'll be just the reboot I need.

I'm ridiculously excited to share Ending #2 (and Endings 1, 3, 4, and 5) with you. I'm in love with the different ways the last few chapters can play out, even if they're still mostly in my head. It's all a bit messy right now, but I'm so freaking keen.

As always, thanks so much for supporting me. The messages I receive in my inbox (both on tumblr and via email), the people pre-ordering Of Monsters and Mainframes, and the extra money I make via Kofi have all played a very well part in helping me get through some intense real life stuff. Especially Kofi. Not being constantly so financially stressed has allowed me to really dive into my writing in a way I never have before. Thank you all so much.

Play the demo for $5 AUD (which is like... $3.30ish USD) at this link:

Or wait until the moon is full. 💙

[hiskillingjar]

Please plspls write sexed up abusive lesbians law x strade 🤞🤞

sorry lesbians, sorry dykes, this is a post for fucked up transfems and quasi-chasers now. sorry :(

4000+ words, cw for slurs, they are the worst grindr hookup in the world and i'm obsessed with themmmmm (this may have a part 2 if the people don't execute me)

also crossposted on ao3 give me attentionnnnnuh

"hey cutie, having a good night?"

Lawrence almost flinched after hearing the foreign notification ‘blllip’ on their phone. 

It was late, they had just gotten home from work and they were sifting through their saved videos (car crashes, open-faced surgery, execution porn and the like) to get to sleep, their body heavy on the mattress, their head heavier with drugged intoxication from a short smoking circle at the warehouse before they left.

They blinked sleepy grey (dead) eyes as they opened the app with a slide of their thumb, the orange-and-black interface unfamiliar, they used it so little.

Right. They downloaded this to buy weed from the new guy at work, didn’t they? 

Did they even have a profile set up? Apparently so, if someone nearby had found them.

They let out a short sigh through their nose, moving onto their back under the heavy, weighted blankets as they typed out a reply to ‘strade 36 verse’.

‘Verse’. What did that even mean?

"Hi."

Lawrence barely had time to rub their eyes before the orange bubble was typing again. 

"hi!"

An instant reply. ‘Strade 36 verse’ must have been online then.

They sat up with another sigh and their lips pursed in a thoughtful pout, wondering if they should respond further, and what to say if they did. 

They didn’t really know the etiquette of most social media, after all. The most exposure they’d had to it was a Tumblr account that was quickly taken down when they posted an especially gory work-in-progress photo of a new sculpture (for “violating community guidelines’ they said when they’d asked), and they’d left it at that, so this was new to them. 

It wasn't like they’d been on something as casual as a dating app before, so they had no prior experience or point of reference on how these kinds of interactions generally played out.

So, in place of another message, they decided to wait for ‘Strade 36 verse’ to reply again, to send the dreaded ‘double text’ or lose interest in their flaky response, before they did anything on their own.

They wouldn’t have to wait long for that, though.

"nice pics, you’re very, very cute." He praised, sending through a winking-face emoji and a blonde angel emoji, referencing the badly taken, but well-cropped mirror selfies on their profile, just so the weed guy knew who they were when they messaged. "are you down for anything tonight?"

Lawrence frowned, idly worrying their bottom lip between their crooked teeth as they pushed a hand into their greasy hair. They’d shower before work tomorrow. Or not.

They weren't entirely sure what ‘down for anything’ meant and weren't sure if they necessarily wanted to know either.

"Thank you.” They typed, well-trained to be polite to compliments. “Down for anything like what, exactly?"

"lol, you're adorable"

"like hooking up? lol"

Lawrence nearly dropped their phone at that.

Their face burned a hot red as they sat upright quickly, pushing aside their weighted blankets and ruminating in silence for several long moments on how to respond to Strade’s outright forwardness.

Was everyone on this app like this?

"I don't know you.” They wrote with another deep frown. “I only really use this app to buy weed. What do you want from me?"

"haha that's hilarious!" Strade wrote back quickly with a series of laughing emojis, which just made Lawrence frown even more. What did he find so funny? "cute pics for a burner account tho. what's that for?~"

They felt their face burning hotter and hotter as they stared at Strade's response, dumbfounded at his capacity to play along with such unwilling prey, before setting the phone down in their lap and pressing the heels of both hands to their eyes, too tired and (frankly) too high to make sense of what this guy was trying to do to them.

‘...cute pics...?’

They took a breath and picked up their phone again, trying to respond as normally as they could without cussing the guy out.

"What do you mean cute? It's just my face."

"it’s a cute face," He sent with a virtual wink.

They took another short moment, trying to collect themself, long, trembling fingers hovering over the keyboard on their phone, before they typed out another response. 

"I don't know about cute...but thanks, I think."

"you're so welcome~"

There was a pause as Strade typed another string of words, punctuated by an orange bubble and animated ellipses.

"if you're not here to hook up, maybe we could just exchange pics hm?"

"Pictures of...what exactly?"

"i'll show you mine if you show me yours," He wrote, punctuated by an eggplant emoji, a peach emoji and…a water spray emoji.

Lawrence didn’t need to be a genius in social media lingo to know exactly what that meant.

They tried to swallow the growing lump in their throat before reluctantly replying.

"What makes you think I'd send you a picture like that? I don't even know what you look like."

"i have a profile pic sweetheart," He wrote with another winking emoji, making Lawrence flush that they hadn’t even taken the time to look at Strade’s profile before they started talking to him. "but fair point! wanna make sure i’m not a catfish, huh?"

'Sweetheart...'

The nickname sent a little chill down Lawrence’s spine, but…not in a wholly unpleasant way.

It might have even been kind of nice to be called that, even if it was from a stranger on a dating app of all places.

There were a few moments of ‘silence’ before their phone ‘blllipped’ with a notification that Strade had sent them a picture, which they quickly opened. 

He looked like...well, he looked like a totally normal guy in his thirties, relaxing on a couch as if he’d just gotten home from work after a hard day. Tan skin, dark stubble, a handsome smile, everything people liked in a man. He was shirtless, showing off a soft chest and the beginnings of a slightly softer stomach, but that was probably the nature of the app.

"You're...very good-looking. Nice muscles." Lawrence typed honestly, a little hesitantly, staring at the picture for a prolonged moment before swapping back to the chat.

"thanks cutie," He wrote with a beating heart emoji, making Lawrence’s own heart tighten in their chest. "how are you looking right now?"

They idly chewed the inside of their cheek and looked down at themself. 

They weren’t anything special and never considered themself to be, wearing a pair of tattered pyjama pants and a loose-fitting top printed with the warehouse’s logo. 

That probably wasn’t the vibe for this interaction, was it?

"I mean, not good like you. I'm wearing pyjamas right now."

"maybe i'll decide what looks good, hm?"

"send me something."

They felt their face flush hotter when the second message popped up, bringing the edge of their phone to their mouth with a shuddering little sigh that fogged up the cracked glass.

This was getting pretty embarrassing, but, at the same time, it was...kind of exciting.

They’d never done anything like this before, certainly not with a stranger, and…Strade had such an authoritative vibe about him without even being in the room.

They felt almost compelled to obey him, even if there was no side effect to not.

Lawrence shifted over the side of the bed and reluctantly lifted the phone for a selfie, reaching up with their other hand to cover their mouth and most of their jaw, keeping the focus on their messy hair, their sleepy eyes, their slender neck, their collar bone, the low collar of their shirt…things that they guessed Strade might like in a conversation partner.

Once they had taken the picture, they sent it over quickly before they could think too long and change their mind.

Strade responded almost immediately.

"awwww~" He wrote, with a heart eyes emoji and another angel emoji. "very cute!"

Oh God, they really weren’t used to being called cute this much.

Their heart was racing as they read the short string of messages, their pale cheeks flushing and their dead eyes fluttering a little as their thighs pressed together tightly.

"You...really think so?"

"i know so~" He complimented again. "you’re such a good girl for listening to me too <3"

'Good girl-!?'

Lawrence's heart was beating even faster now, just from that one little compliment, and they found themself sinking back against the bed and staring at the popcorn, mould-dotted ceiling, feeling all the heat in their body rush right down to their cock.

It seemed kind of...demeaning to be called a 'good girl' in this scenario, but at the same time, it felt...so amazing.

They just hoped that Strade wasn’t getting the wrong idea.

“Thank you…but I’m not a girl though.” They typed when their brain started working again, resting their phone on their chest, their legs trembling and bopping up and down, nervously.

"oh no? apologies for assuming but you do have trans stuff in your bio lol"

"you look pretty enough to be a girl. figuring stuff out?"

The instinct to cringe subsided quickly when they clicked on their profile, noticing the absence of the gender marker that Strade had (‘M’), and their pronouns (‘they/them, any/all’) listed along with their location, the only information they had provided the app, barring their picture.

"That was an accident...I didn't know what it was asking me." They typed out, explaining their mix-up.

‘Pretty enough to be a girl...’ 

They suddenly found themself feeling…warm all over as those words repeated in their head, feeling the sincerity behind them, the authenticity behind them. 

Maybe they weren’t a girl, at least, not a girl they had ever been close to before, but there was the…well, the fact that Strade had assumed their gender incorrectly several times now, and they had done nothing to correct him. 

"happy accidents, eh?" Strade replied quickly with another laughing emoji, though this one felt more fond and affectionate than the others had been. "do you like being a good girl, law?"

They swallowed tightly and managed to type out a response, their hands trembling with excitement.

"Yeah…I mean, yeah I think I do."

"thought so." Another virtual wink. This guy used a lot of emojis. "can i see something else now, angel?" He wrote, like no part of that conversation happened, and even though it was phrased like a question, Lawrence had that good sense that it was not to be taken as one.

They felt their face burning hotter than ever as they typed out a response.

"What do you want me to show you…?”

"show me your body.” 

“do you have a mirror so i can see all of you?"

Lawrence had to stop and close their eyes, knees tightly pressed together as they tried to collect themself and slow the pounding of their racing heart.

They’d never felt like this before. It felt good.

It felt good. 

Why weren’t they used to feeling good?

They took in a deep breath, trying to calm themself down, before they got to their feet and walked over to their bathroom, hesitantly taking a full-body (or, well, as close to full-body as they could manage) picture in the bathroom cabinet mirror, using the phone to cover their face and focus on their body.

They looked so…boring in the reflection, wearing that old, baggy top and those loose-fitting pants. 

Strade can’t really be that interested in them, can he?

"aw, you're so little. like you wouldn't be able to fight me off if i pinned you down <3"

Those immediate words set butterflies fluttering around in their stomach.

They were definitely not tiny by any metric, standing at almost six foot and easily taller than most of the guys in the warehouse, but the idea of being...pinned down by a stranger of all people, was making their brain short circuit.

And fine, they weren’t sure if Strade meant it in an affectionate way or…a creepy way, talking about their body like it was a piece of meat and he was an animal feeding on them, but Lawrence couldn’t think of a reason to be scared of the obvious red flags coming out of their conversation.

They swallowed past the ever-growing lump in their throat as they paced back to their bed, sitting down and trying their best to keep their responses coherent as they typed out another anxious reply.

"Oh yeah..? Think so?"

"i know so..."

God, he was quick.

"mind pulling those pants down?"

They chewed the inside of their cheek again, hesitating for maybe a moment before they began to slowly pull their pyjama bottoms down their skinny hips, exposing their boxer briefs and the bulge of their cock. 

They felt so exposed, like someone could just walk in and see them right now, and yet...

They took another picture and sent it to Strade without a word, feeling the flush spread across their face as they did so.

"those look pretty tight, baby," He wrote after a pause. "like that cute girlcock is desperate for something its not gonna get. too cute <3"

What the fuck, girlcock-?!

Every word of the message made them shiver more and more, making the aching feeling in their chest that much more intense and tight, so tight it was almost painful. 

God, they couldn’t even begin to describe how this fucking stranger was making them feel. 

They were starting to feel desperate, like he said they were, their girlcock stirring and pressing even tighter against the taut fabric of their briefs, denying them anything close to relief.

They swallowed again, their tongue poking out to wet their dry lips as they typed a needy response.

"Please…just keep talking to me like that…”

"you're such a good girl," Strade continued to praise with another beating heart emoji. "spread your legs, make those panties nice and tight for me so i can see your girlcock press up there…"

They had to close their eyes momentarily and take in a deep, shaky breath to calm themself before they even attempted a response.

It was almost hard to type with how worked up they were, how much their fucking girlcock was stirring, how much their hands were shaking. They felt so submissive and helpless, like they wouldn’t even be able to think without Strade telling them to. 

They just wanted to do whatever he told them to do.

Their legs parted as far as they could (while still framed nicely in the camera) and they jutted their hips slightly, making the thick bulge of their cock the focus of the picture. Light blonde hair covered their tummy and thighs, and they almost felt self-conscious about it, for the first time in their life.

A girl shouldn’t have that there…at least, not a good girl.

"fuck, you're killing me," He wrote with that angel emoji again. "you little tease. what i wouldn't give to have you here now."

Lawrence closed their eyes with a soft moan as they held the pose, trying to imagine what it would be like if he was here instead of just ordering them around over the phone.

They were still trembling but they couldn’t help but smile coyly to themself as they thought out another response.

"What would you do to me if I was there right now?"

"you really want to know, sweetheart?"

They swallowed hard, their grey eyes wide and unnervingly alive, and replied, almost without a thought.

"Yes. Tell me please…I want to know."

…

…

…

"i wouldn't let anyone else even get the chance to look at you, let alone touch you, before i’m through with you, lawrence"

"i'd take you down in my basement and make you scream. hurt you. cut you. fuck you even if you fought me back. ruin that cute little body and torture your girlcock until you begged me to stop."

"and i wouldn't stop <3 even if you screamed and cried and behaved like suuuuch a good girl for me, angel <3"

…

…

…

"You’d do that to me…?"

…

…

…

"yeah. i like ruining pretty things." He wrote. "and you're the prettiest thing i've seen in weeks."

Lawrence could feel themself almost trembling as they stared at their phone, their hands shaking. 

They managed to type out a response, each letter in their reply feeling like a tremendous amount of effort when their fingers were shaking like jelly, just holding onto the phone.

"You really think I’m…pretty…?"

Their heart was pounding as they waited for a reply, waited for those tell-tale orange dots to move again, their once-dead eyes wide and alive and ready for more as their head spun behind them. 

It was like they were experiencing an entirely new high, one more dangerous and more pleasurable than any drug could give them.

They could see themself getting quickly addicted to it, and knew that this addiction was sure to kill them faster than any other vice would.

“haha you're kind of a freak law," Strade seemed to tease when his reply finally popped up, though it was lacking the emojis that typically gave his teasing nature away. "i like that a lot. pretty girls are never usually as filthy as you~"

Their head canted slightly as they read the message, wetting their lips again as they reached down and idly palmed their cock, feeling the hard flesh between their long fingers and wishing that Strade was the one doing the touching instead.

Freak. Filth. Words growing on them like mould grew on spoiled food. 

They were gradually getting infected by whatever disease Strade must have had to enjoy this, and they couldn’t have been happier

They flopped back heavily on the bed with a shaky exhale, that same feeling of twisted pride they got when he called them a “good girl” washing over them.

They managed to respond with one hand occupied (still squeezing their rotten cock that was enjoying every moment of this), their fingers still trembling.

"Yeah, I’m kind of a freak I guess…”

A pretty freak…a pretty girl…

Their cock pulsed hotter.

"yeah.”

“even the most poorly-adjusted tranny has the self-respect not to put up with all of this. what's the matter, law, you don't have any of that?"

They whimpered softly and bit their lip hard (so hard, they could practically taste blood), before rolling onto their side and bringing their knees up to their heaving chest as their cock twitched incessantly between their trembling legs, their slack body shivering all over as they squeezed their thighs tightly together.

Fuck, this was so awful. So, so fucking awful.

Then why was their head pounding, their chest heaving, their cock throbbing harder and harder (and harder and harder), the worse it got?

They swallowed hard, the lump in their throat almost painful to gulp past, as they read the message again, and despite themself, they reached down and started tugging on their cock as they typed, their heart continuing to race at an impossible pace from the mix of excitement and dread at feeling so vulnerable and exposed to this man.

"Why would I want self-respect if it means I can’t talk to you…?”

"good answer <3"

They couldn’t help but smile upon reading the new text, cradling the phone to their shuddering chest with one hand, as the other tightened the hold on their cock, the veins in their wrist pulsating as it jerked up and down their length. 

God, they were just completely hooked on this fucking stranger, addicted to his praise, his threats, his dirty talk (if it could even be called that).

They lay there for a moment, just jerking themself off with wet gasps and shifting skin on skin, trying to even think of what to do next. 

Their mind was so fuzzy and filled with thoughts of Strade, Strade, Strade that they could hardly concentrate, even without the initial fuzz the weed had given them.

It was a perfect sensation.

"what are you doing now, law?"

“I’m…touching myself.”

“show me.”

Like everything else with Strade, it was phrased like a question but Lawrence knew that they didn’t have the luxury of disagreeing with him.

Like they even wanted that luxury to begin with.

They obediently moved backwards, up their bed, lying flat on their back (belly up, like a prey animal offering itself to a rightful predator) and parting their trembling thighs again, wrenching their briefs all the down their legs and taking an awkward picture of their cock in hand, the flushed head and firm length framed by the thin, milky white pillars of their scarred thighs.

They were just glad that this app didn’t have access to their storage and that any pictures exchanged in the chat wouldn’t be saved.

That would have been incredibly fucking embarrassing. 

"haha wtf you're fucking huge," Strade quickly wrote back in response, making fun of them, though, again, the message was lacking his usual emojis (as had many of the previous messages, actually). "talk about wasted potential, eh, law?"

“What do you mean, wasted potential…”

“it means when i fuck you,” When, not if, when, NOT IF. “i'm not letting you top for a single day of the rest of your wretched, little life”

They licked their lips hungrily, eyes wide with anticipation.

“Is…is that a threat…or a promise…?”

"both <3"

God.

GOD. 

They felt like they were going insane.

They just wanted more and more of his words, wanted to take everything this man was saying to them and amplify it, make it worse, make it despicable, diabolical, disgusting, more, more, more-

“God, I hope so…” They typed, the jerking of their wrist faster as heat coiled up, hot and tight, in their belly. “You make me feel like I’m losing my mind…”

"won't need a mind for what i'm planning for you, sweetheart"

“Fuck…” They stammered softly to themself, words falling past their parted lips in a helpless whimper, as they squeezed their cock harder, a thick bead of pre-cum drooling over their bony knuckles. They didn’t touch themself that often, all of their saved videos were no longer able to scratch the itch of their deadened arousal, but now, they were feeling it, so close, so desperate-

“i want you to stop touching yourself now, law”

Their hand stilled instantly, their pale brows knitting together as another typing bubble popped up.

“you don’t work weekends, do you?”

They swallowed hard, typing out a reply while anticipating the next message.

“No, not usually…why?”

“you know the braying mule in town? just next to that new whole foods?��� Donkey emoji, beer glass emoji, wilting leaf emoji.

Lawrence took a moment to think about the spot Strade was describing. 

It wasn’t too far from the warehouse, now that they were thinking about it, in a slightly sketchier place in town that was facing a wave of gentrification (hence the Whole Foods that they, unfortunately, did frequent for tea ingredients and discount granola).

“Yeah…?”

“are you gonna meet me there next saturday?”

Once again, phrased like a question but Lawrence knew there was no option to say no.

Like they would have said no.

“I guess I am.”

“good girl.” Angel emoji, beating heart emoji. “and are you going to give yourself anyyyy relief before then?”

He was teasing again, and the praise and indirect order was enough to send another pulse of heat to their cock, making it that much more painful and unsatisfying when they let go of it and lay back on the bed.

“I…guess I’m not.”

“she’s smart for a poorly-adjusted faggot, isn’t she?”

God, he was just so demeaning, and they were absolutely obsessed with it.

That warm, fluttery feeling in the pit of their stomach was back, and it felt even stronger than before. 

They almost had to resist the urge to bite their bottom lip and start jerking off again…and they could only muster the shakiest of responses.

“Yeah…she is.”

“such a good girl, law.” He wrote, and Lawrence could practically see the shit-eating grin on his handsome face. “i’m looking forward to meeting you <3”

“Me too…”

[moonshynecybin]

do you have any motogp fic recs?

yeah sure man. im gonna keep it simple (ao3 only) because i am a capricious bookmarker and refuse to wade through the weeds of tumblr fic as im not a natural tagger. no order just vibes. all of these i love and reread !

cant change that, cant change you by kingsquarding

Marc at the ranch for the (second) first time.

this fic is the platonic ideal of marc and vale post reconciliation being TOGETHER and at the RANCH and trying to make it WORK but they are also. still being a little messed up. themes include: guilt. injury. marc trying to get vale to stop treating him like glass and FUCK HIM already because he doesnt want to admit that their relationship/his body has changed since he was twenty. delicious.

Che Spettacolo! by serve_cunt

“What do you think,” Vale says, and leans against the doorframe. “Will he come?” Uccio stays silent. Of course he will come, he wants to say. In what world does he stay away? In what world can he resist?

sending uccio to the cuck chair. outside POV rosquez always hits for me becuase they match each other's freak in so many ways its fun to see what antics they engage in as obsevered by someone more normal. in this case. uccio. also helps get around vale's shit ass communication because its him through the eyes of someone who KNOWS that vale is being WEIRD. even if marc doesnt. fun and SEXY. academic au by the same author ALSO slays

of crashing and burning (and falling for you) by Anonymous

It has always been Marc and Valentino, Valentino and Marc. Two rivals inseparable on- and off-track throughout their careers, their story so closely intertwined they might as well have been the same person, dominating their beloved sport between the two of them. Then Marc breaks his arm, Vale loses their championship, and they are left trying to pick up the pieces. AKA a rosquez same age AU.

someone wrote out. elle and i's same age au. and it was so perfect i legit struggle to answer asks about this au now because im just like. its in the AU !!! its all here !!! really nails vale in this specific scenario imo... all the love and resentment and self-imposed walls and. my favorite of all. the exact way these guys talk in press conferences. like their exact diction. hits the spot beautifulperfect

arms out like an angel by yekoc

“Does Marc still work here?” he asks. He can’t think of the word for performing. “I dunno, man,” the guy says. “Sorry, I’m new.” Vale blinks at him. “Find out,” he says, and then, annoyed at himself for the impatience, “if you can. I came a long way.”

the efficiency of word choice in terms of characterization in this one really moves me... every line has implications !!! sexy ones even !!! and theres so much baseline CHEMISTRY and inability to really STAY AWAY from each other but also. a tense little undercurrent of slight misunderstanding and hurt that makes it stand out... i also just love fics where marc pushes back just a lil and vale has to like. figure out what to do with that. in a horny way. yekoc's bezzcele also goes crazy if you wanna think about nipple piercings as much as i do

All I Wanted by agnst-crrnt

The first time it happens is just after Marc’s 10th birthday. He’s about to complain to his parents about how Álex always finishes the milk and then puts it back into the fridge, when the faces of his parents’ blur in front of him. Marc closes his eyes, trying to make it better and grabs onto the edge of the table. He can hear his mama ask him if he’s okay, before everything stops. or Rosquez Time Travel Au, where Marc randomly gets teleported through time, always ending up somewhere around Vale

hey thats my friend. rosquez time travel au as ive said my favorite thing to think about maybe EVER !!! really love the strict marc POV on this one and how you REALLY see the. youre in love so you go. and his just. his ceaseless romanticism and optimism wrt to vale and their relationship that fits this fic concept SO well. guest appearances from pedrenzo as well yayyyyy

i give into the fall series by lestelledreams

Her and Pol were good; they did win a gold at Junior Worlds after all, and that’s not something anyone can just go out there and do. But her and Valentino – they could become great. Mar’s never been more sure of anything in her life. or, The first year of Mar's and Vale's partnership.

genderbend figure skating au where marc gets to have all his weird injury complexes explored AND it gets slutty AND we get to see his freak ass ambition. imagine if motogp was a pairs sport (like actually not just in a fake way) and marc had the option of pairing up with vale. imagine how crazy he would go trying to make that happen adfhdflk

a hundred ninety-nine degrees by hardlythewiser (sequinedfairy)

“You should fuck me again,” Bez says. It trips out, all his defenses worn down by the long, annoying day of meetings, by the feeling of Cele above him, pressing him down into the couch, by Cele’s bright clear gaze. Above him, Cele doesn’t smile with his whole face, scrunching up his eyes, like he did the first time Bez asked. He doesn’t smile at all, just keeps looking at Bez. “Really?” he asks. “I didn’t know – did you like it, last time?”

cele tops lets GOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. some fics just. have an ability to pierce directly towards what actually and precisely makes a pairing or a situation or a dynamic SEXY, while also revealing a new facet of said dynamic that i've never thought about in depth before. this is one of those. fuck him!!! make him cry !!!! perfect !!!

i was having a sweet fix of a daydream of a boy (whose reality i knew was hopeless to be had) by babynflames

In Motegi 2005, Hiroshi Aoyama wins his first race during his home GP, Dani Pedrosa gets second while hiding a fractured humerus and Jorge Lorenzo is handed a one race ban for riding in a irresponsible manner after nearly colliding with Dani and causing de Angelis to abandon the race, leaving the third position to Casey Stoner. The haircutting is incidental.

dyke PEDRENZO. fic that is fun and funny and filled to the BRIM with the kind of homoerotic tension you can only have between two teenage dykes in direct competition who dont even know theyre horny about each other except they REALLY kind of do. also. the best sports rpf to me always engages with a sport on a sociological level... also just love the writing style on this. direct and avoidant at the same time. very dani in sexuality crisis to me aljfdhl

[nonnymousehouse]

Della/Launchpad Ship Meta

I feel like people should talk about the things they like more often, especially when it comes to ships. Meta isn't very common anymore and shipping manifestos - essays written by fans talking about why they love the ship that they do - appear to be a dead practice.

I wrote this short mini essay for the Delpad Fan Club here on Tumblr and later posted it on AO3. I may write more in the future. As for other places with Delpad meta, you can check out Kirbtaro's fanblog which contains all of her Delpad meta over the years.

If you disagree, that's okay! All I ask is that you be respectful and read with an open mind. This is fandom, after all. The whole point is to play with possibilities in a fan space!

Simply put, these two have so much to learn from each other and, in many ways, are the only two who can help one another. You can try to put other characters in their place, but it won't work.

One of Launchpad's greatest insecurities is rooted in how he isn't a traditionally taught pilot. A lot of his skills come from learning on the (ahem) fly. Della is traditionally taught and works hard to be the best at everything. The idea that she could fail and fail hard upsets her.

Her greatest source of trauma is when she crashed on the moon - due to her own folly. She may have the practical skills to land a plane, but when pushed into an emergency situation, she didn't know how to handle an emergency crash. To Launchpad, this would be second nature to him.

While the show does have Della teaching him how to land a plane and Launchpad teaching her how to crash properly, I feel like the show didn't really delve into what a big deal this is for both of them. The two of them are healing their deepest sources of trauma through the others' skillsets. It would have been fun to see the two of them acknowledge that.

If Launchpad had taught Della how to safely crash from before, she wouldn't have lost her leg. If Della taught Launchpad how to properly land a plane, it would help him overcome his fears of not being good enough.

Launchpad admires anyone who can get back up from their setbacks and Della Duck is firm in her belief that nothing can stop her! The things that LP loves about the Sunchaser (when he was chatting with Beakley in Last Crash) are the same exact qualities that Scrooge compliments Della on when he sees her leg.

While the show may never directly acknowledge it, the two need each other to become the people they most desire to be - to be their most complete selves. Launchpad is an outsider to the family but desperately wants to be a part of it. Della is a part of the family but, due to her past, feels like an outsider. If these two work together, maybe they can find a solution that makes both of their wishes come true.

And, well, wouldn't that fit the theme of found family? Webby is also an outsider who longs to be part of the McDucks and her reward is to be Scrooge's protege - the successor to his fortune. Launchpad's feelings as an outsider of the McDucks never really changes - his consolation is that he has to find a new family for himself. Which never sat right with me - surely he can have the Mallards and the McDuck/Duck family as his families at the same time? The show outright states that he continues to work for both Scrooge & DW at the same time after Let's Get Dangerous.

If Launchpad were to, say, marry Della, he'd get to be an official member of Scrooge's family, just as he's always wanted. He'd essentially be Scrooge's son-in-law (or, well, nephew in law). Kinda like how being Scrooge's daughter allows Webby to be the "fourth nephew" - which is what Webby has always wanted.

[uninspireddreamsandwhims]

An Idiot's Guide to Free Cake

I wrote a Klance fic a few months ago based off a Tumblr prompt by alrightevans, "I just saw a thing on fb like ‘does somebody wanna be fake engaged to me for like 2 hours to try free wedding cake samples’ and I'm just…………………imagine ur otp". It's my first time posting on here so hopefully this goes smoothly lol. It's also lightly inspired by a story a friend once told me of how she faked an engagement for free cake at a restaurant lol. I had a lot of fun writing this and I just figured I'd share it here as well! If you'd rather read on AO3 (https://archiveofourown.org/works/56362210) Thanks for reading! _____________________________________________ Keith slid into the slightly sticky booth seat, already regretting the decision to come.

Well. He wouldn’t call it a decision. That would involve options. Non-coerced options that didn’t involve threats and blackmail.

Keith buried his face in his hands, taking a deep, steadying breath. It’s just one dinner. All he has to do is grit his teeth, order his food, avoid eye contact, and dip once an appropriate amount of time has passed. He can do this. He has to do this.

His dignity is at stake, after all.

Distracted by his internal pep-talk, Keith didn’t hear Lance approach until he was crashing into the booth across from him with a loud huff. Keith dragged his head up to glare at the man.

Lance, late as always - though this time thankfully so - seemed unbothered by Keith’s glare. He flashed a smile at the hostess who showed him to the table and thanked her warmly enough Keith noticed the beginnings of a blush bloom on her cheeks. Even after the hostess scurried off, Lance still didn’t turn to look at Keith.

So this is how he wants to play, huh? Even though Keith planned on using this exact tactic, it annoyed him that Lance had started before he could. He got here first. It should be him starting the averted glares and pointed silence.

Keith mentally kicked himself. He was being childish. Lance tended to bring that out in Keith; a side of Keith that even he didn’t know he was capable of until Lance came into the picture. Lance just had a way of getting under Keith’s skin. He knew all the ways to make Keith tick. It would be humiliating if Keith wasn’t able to do the same to Lance. Though, unfortunately, that’s precisely why they’re in the predicament that they’re in.

Keith lifted his chin defiantly, refusing to utter a word to Lance. Not even a sign of acknowledgment. Lance came late so he should say something first. Instead, Keith busied himself with the menu, scanning the options.

Fuck this place was expensive. $25 for a plate of pasta. For most places Keith goes to, $25 can cover the meal, drink, and tip. Why they couldn’t just meet at a college town restaurant was beyond him. Lance just had to pick this place. Keith rolled his eyes in annoyance before scanning the rest of the menu for something somewhat reasonable. He found a burger, with fries (truly a surprise), for a little over $18. It was still going to be a pricey meal, but at least it wasn’t $25 for pasta.

Across from him, Lance picked up his menu and scanned over the selections. Softly, almost too quiet to make out over the din of the people around them, Keith could have sworn he heard Lance say, “Jesus.” Lance’s teeth tugged at his bottom lip, chewing absently as his brows pinched together in time with his eyes dropping lower and lower down the menu. Keith gritted his teeth.

If you’re so shocked by the menu, why did you pick this place? He wanted to snap. But he’d already sworn to himself he wouldn’t say anything first and he’ll be damned if he breaks so soon. Keith looked around the cozy, intimate restaurant. They were seated in a cramped booth against a dividing wall that split up the main dining area. The kind of booth that encouraged closeness and murmured conversations. It seemed like a place that preferred you to lean in close, maybe hold hands, and share stories or inside jokes with one another. A small oasis in a crowded restaurant. Keith found himself leaning back against his seat, chasing away the idea.

The lighting in the room was soft, almost annoyingly too buttery yellow for comfort, which made Keith rub his eyes in agitation. Waiters bustled around, bright smiles plastered on their faces. Some walked from table to table, their sole purpose being to offer wine and top-off drinks. This was definitely not the kind of place Keith often found himself in.

He thought about his past few meals - whatever concoction he could create to fill his stomach while not draining his wallet. Until recently, he’d been coasting off a diet of cereal and ramen. But he was sick of ramen and he was beginning to think he might be lactose intolerant. He’s not proud of it, but recently Keith succumbed to mixing store-bought queso, chicken nuggets, rice, and hot sauce and using it as a dip for his chips. It tasted better than it should have.

So while Keith was not looking forward to the price of this meal, and was most definitely not looking forward to spending it with Lance, he was, at the very least, fucking thankful to be eating something other than the remnants of his fridge.

A waiter coasted up to their table, high ponytail swinging even after she came to a stop. “Hello and welcome! My name is Addison and I’ll be taking care of you two this evening.” Her voice was bubbly and sweet. Lance glanced up from his menu, startled by her sudden appearance.

He recovered quickly, a smooth grin unfurling across his lips as he returned her smile. 

“Good evening Addison,” he replied, voice gentle and welcoming. It wasn’t flirtatious, as Lance often is with others, but Addison still seemed a bit flustered. Keith wanted to kick Lance in the shin but he held himself back. He wasn’t technically doing anything wrong.

“Right, erm…” Addison trailed off for a second, seemingly losing her place in her routine. “Can I get you guys started with any drinks?”

“Just a water for me,” Keith told her. No need to spend almost five dollars for a glass of soda that was mostly just ice. Addison gave a quick nod before turning back to Lance.

“I’ll take the summer peach tea,” Lance told her. Of course he would get something like that. Never mind that Keith didn’t know what options there were to begin with, having deliberately chosen to avoid them on the menu. But he wasn’t shocked. It was an entirely Lance-like drink. Sweet, fruity, and overly indulgent.

“Oh, that’s a good one. I get that all the time,” Addison said, sounding a bit too sincere to be genuine. Keith wondered how often she even ate at the restaurant. If it were him, he wouldn’t dare eat where he worked. Just being there for work was exhausting enough. It would suck to come in when he wasn’t even scheduled. “Would you guys like any appetizers to start with? Or are you ready to order?”

Lance shot Keith a wide-eyed look, the kind that would be comical if Keith wasn’t already so annoyed with him. Part of Keith wanted to say, “Why yes, we are actually.” just to watch Lance scramble to find something. But that would be a little too dickish.

“I still need a minute,” Lance admitted, sheepish.

“Oh absolutely, no worries,” Addison reassured him. “I’ll be right back with those drinks.” She zipped away, disappearing almost as fast as she came. Keith sighed, sinking back into his seat as the silence settled over them, creating their own shitty little bubble of discomfort.

Lance’s face was pinched, brows puckered and his lips scrunched in his thinking expression. Keith watched as he began to tap absentmindedly on his chin with a long, slender index finger. Finally, Lance puffed out a sigh, seemingly coming to a decision. He placed the menu on the table and glanced up, jumping when his eyes met Keith’s.

Keith’s own eyes widened, startled by the sudden eye contact. Quickly he dropped his gaze to his hands, fingers curled into a tangle in his lap. He heard Lance clear his throat and wondered if Lance would be the first to break their standoff.

But whatever Lance was about to say was interrupted by Addison’s sudden return. Lance thanked her warmly, not the least bit annoyed by the interruption, while she cheerily deposited their drinks onto the table. Keith felt a surge of gratitude to the server, thankful to prolong the inevitable for a few moments longer.

“So, are we ready to order yet?” She asked cautiously. Keith glanced up, casting his gaze from Addison, to Lance, and back to Addison.

“Um, I am…if you are,” he mumbled, looking back at Lance again. Lance nodded, shooting one last look at the menu. Taking the chance, Keith gave his order to Addison. “I’ll take the classic cheeseburger. No tomatoes on it, please.” Addison’s head bobbed as she jotted down the order.

“No tomato, got it. Everything else on there okay?” Keith nodded. “And are the fries okay as your side?” He nodded again. She smiled and took his menu from him. “You got it then. And for you, sir?”

Lance glanced up again, the usual smile unfurling once more. “My turn already?” He let out a small chuckle. “There’s so much to pick from, it’s hard to settle on just one thing.” Addison laughed.

“Oh, I know. The menu changes every season, so there's always something new.”

“Does it really?” Lance asked, genuine curiosity in his tone. “That sounds awesome. Makes you want to come back to try it all." Keith wanted to roll his eyes. Lance seemed to make it his goal in life to be liked by everyone. "But for today," Lance continued, his face briefly scrunching up before finally deciding. "I think I’ll settle for the shrimp ravioli.”

“Excellent choice,” Addison said as she scribbled on her pad. “I haven’t personally had that one before - shellfish allergy - but I hear customers raving about it all the time. I’ll go put these in for you.” She swept away again, her ponytail swinging like a pendulum behind her.

“I like her,” Lance mused. Keith shot him a look, eyebrow rising in a silent question. “She seems nice,” he added without looking at Keith. Whether he was talking to himself or he noticed Keith’s gaze was unclear. Instead, Lance unraveled a straw from the plastic casing and plunked it into his drink. Keith squinted at the concoction. Tea was settled at the bottom, mixing with what Keith assumed was lemonade on top, with chunks of peach floating alongside ice cubes. He wondered if that was any good. And how well that would go with shrimp.

Just the thought of that made his nose wrinkle. He wasn’t a big fan of seafood and the idea of eating shrimp and washing it down with a peach-flavored Arnold Palmer sounded awful.

“Is that any good?” He finally asked, caving. He wasn’t technically losing his one-sided cold war, Lance had spoken first after all. Whether it was just to himself or to Keith didn’t matter.

At least, that's what Keith told himself.

Lance’s gaze flittered up, eyes wide like he was surprised to hear Keith speaking to him. He blinked, slowly, before considering. “It’s pretty good,” he admitted. “But I am regretting it, now that I’ve ordered.” It seemed Lance had come to the same conclusion that Keith had. Peach tea and shrimp ravioli probably weren’t a match made in culinary heaven.

“Can’t see why you’d think that,” Keith said, his tone dry and words a little more sarcastic than he’d meant for it to come off as. Lance bristled slightly, his eyes narrowing as if he was readying for a fight. Keith winced. “Sorry,” he muttered. This was supposed to be a peace negotiation. He wasn’t here to make things worse.

A few days prior, Lance and Keith had gotten into another argument. Keith couldn’t even remember what it was about; their bickering had been the background to so many hangouts that their friends finally sat them down for an intervention. Shiro and Allura led the intervention while Hunk played mediator for Lance and Keith. Pidge was just there for the chaos.

Regardless, the issues between Keith and Lance were getting too big to overlook and their friends were tired of it. Keith hadn’t realized how bad it’d gotten until Allura firmly stated that until they got their act together, neither would be invited to any gatherings in their friend group.

Keith could tell that the command sat heavily on Lance. When Allura announced the plan for Lance and Keith to go out to dinner and play nice…Keith contemplated throwing the whole friend group away. But he couldn’t do that to them. He cared about his friends more than he was willing to admit out loud and would be lying if he said he didn’t find the time they spent together enjoyable. Lance included. It was the first time Keith had ever been part of a friend group and it felt good. He liked spending time with them, going bowling, studying in the library, and doing other silly shenanigans around campus. 

…Not to mention, Keith wasn’t so sure he could replace them if he did throw them away. He wasn’t exactly approachable the way Lance was.

“Whatever,” Lance sighed, leaning his cheek against his palm, giving him an almost pouty look. “So…” he started, looking like he was, for once, at a loss for words. “You’re into places like this, huh?” Keith frowned.

“Why would…” he trailed off, shaking his head. “Wasn’t this your pick, Lance?” Lance snorted a laugh.

“God no. If it were up to me, dinner would be Taco Bell and we’d have gone through the drive-thru.” A laugh burst out of Keith before he could press his lips together to suffocate the sound. In a half-hearted attempt to smother the sound, he faked a cough, covering his mouth with his hand to hide the smile spreading across his lips.

“How romantic,” Keith replied dryly. Lance shot him an over-dramatic wink which earned him another laugh from Keith.

“Romantic indeed though,” Lance mused, eyes roaming the dining area. “I didn’t even know a place like this existed in this town.” Lance turned back to Keith, brows furrowed in confusion. “But wait…if you didn’t pick this place-”

“Absolutely not,” Keith cut in.

“And I definitely wouldn’t choose such a place…” he cocked his head just slightly, the move reminding Keith of a confused puppy. “Who the hell did?”

Keith lifted one shoulder, trying to banish the thought from his mind. “If I had to guess, probably Allura. Seems like the kind of place she would have been to at least once.” Lance hummed softly in agreement. “Though if I’m being honest,” Keith bit back a sigh. “It was also very likely…”

“Pidge,” they said in unison. They stared at each other, wide-eyed, before sharing a small laugh. 

What the hell is going on here? Keith thought to himself. This was probably the most he’d ever enjoyed himself in Lance’s company. Keith never thought there would be a day that he'd genuinely laugh with Lance instead of at him.

“Yeah, I can see that one for sure,” Lance agreed, rubbing a hand down his face. “That gremlin would definitely have chosen the most awkward place possible for us to meet.”

“Awkward? What would make you think that?” Keith said, his tone on the verge of teasing. Lance stared at him, a flustered look on his face. He thought Keith was being serious. 

Keith grinned, pressing on. “I mean, we’re just two dudes, sitting in a small, intimate restaurant with mood lighting and music, on a Friday night at six pm. Entirely normal.” Somewhere between “two dudes” and “mood lighting” Lance caught on to the fact that Keith was joking and had smothered another laugh into his hands. His head was tilted down, making it hard for Keith to see Lance’s expression, but he felt a small flutter in his stomach. He was so used to getting on Lance’s nerves, and vice versa, that it was a bit odd to be making Lance laugh. It was weird to be laughing all. This was not on Keith's Intervention Dinner bingo card.

After a moment, the laughter subsided and the two lapsed into a comfortable silence. Neither said anything for a few minutes. Keith wondered if he should say something, but Lance beat him to it. “You know, it’s a shame we’re sworn enemies.”

Keith blinked. Once. Twice. “What?” Of all the things Lance could have said, “sworn enemies” wasn’t even in consideration. Where had Lance gotten that idea from?

It seemed even Lance was starting to feel self-conscious about his statement. His cheeks flushed a faint pink, but he carried on regardless. “You know, academic rivals—sworn enemies. Destined to never be friends. That sort of stuff.” Keith considered what Lance had just said.

“I don’t get it.” He said finally, voice flat with confusion. He squinted at Lance. “When were we ever academic rivals?? Lance, we aren’t even in the same major.” The pink in Lance’s cheeks reddened.

“Before college,” he muttered. “Back at the Garrison.” Keith’s memories of the Garrison were foggy. Not due to time, but to a lack of desire to dwell on those days. Dropping out of the Garrison was the best thing he’d ever done. He’d very nearly foregone schooling altogether. It was only due to Shiro pushing him to get his GED and then eventually look into colleges that Keith even made it to where he is today.

“Still not sure what you mean,” Keith admitted. Lance looked appalled. No. Not appalled. He looked outraged.

“What?” He snapped, his voice spiking for a brief moment. Keith shot a nervous look around the room. “What do you mean? How could you not know what I’m talking about?” Keith opened his mouth to say something but wasn’t sure what would be best in this situation. He snapped his jaw shut, hissing a breath out between his clenched teeth. There he was. This was the real Lance. Loud, dramatic, and with a chip on his shoulder about god knows what. Keith felt his irritation begin to rise. 

“Well you see Lance,” Keith said with forced patience. “When someone says, ‘I don’t know’, it typically means that they don’t know.” He shot Lance a glare, surprised to see the ferocity in Lance’s eyes as he glared right back at Keith. 

“I spent every day at the Garrison being compared to you,” Lance snapped, jabbing a finger at Keith. He was doing his best to keep his voice low but Keith could tell that others were starting to look at them. Keith couldn’t find the will to care about that though.

“To me?” He asked, incredulously. “Don’t be ridiculous. Why would you get compared to me?” Keith wasn’t positive, but he was almost certain they rarely crossed paths at the Garrison. When he’d met Lance during welcome week two years ago, both newly minted college freshmen, he’d been surprised to hear that Lance had already known him. Since Keith was notoriously bad at remembering faces, he’d just brushed it off. Now he was starting to wonder if that’d been a mistake.

“Because,” Lance hissed. “No matter what I did, no matter how good I was, I could never beat you. Even if I did, technically, surpass you in terms of grades, there was always something or another that you still managed to do better. And everyone talked about that. If I was second place, you were first. It didn't matter if you'd already left. I was constantly chasing after your stupid shadow. It wasn’t just teachers comparing us, our peers compared us too.” He slumped back in his seat, his back thumping hard against the booth seat. He looked utterly defeated, the anger draining out of him. Keith felt a small stab of guilt looking at him.

“I didn’t know that,” Keith admitted, a little embarrassed. He had felt like he’d been drowning during his time at the Garrison. It was strange to hear someone else reflect on it like he’d been some scholar student.

Not some fuck up that dropped out in a fit of rage.

Keith leaned back in the booth, unsure of what to say. He glanced across the table at Lance who looked too immersed in his bitter memories to notice. Keith wondered what he would have been like if he hadn’t dropped out. What Lance would have been like. Their relationship certainly wouldn’t have been any better. The chip on Lance’s shoulder was far too great to overlook and Keith had been too eager to jump into every fight that came across his path at the time. It was probably good that they didn't encounter each other back then.

Not that much has changed in him, it seems. Considering the way he and Lance still bicker and argue even though Keith isn’t always sure why. Sometimes it was the way Lance looked at him. Or the way he seemed to imply certain things. Other times it was just his obnoxiously loud nature. How he seemed too carefree in a crowd. Too at ease no matter where he went, even when he got swarmed by others. Like honey to a sea of flies.

Keith hadn’t wanted to be another drop in the swirling mass. But there were times he craved it. And maybe that too was why he started being nasty back at Lance.

Sunny, golden boy Lance. Always eager to please. He was a friend to anyone and everyone, and despite how he seemed, intelligent as hell. Looking at Lance made Keith feel like he was looking at a bitter reflection of himself. Of who Keith should have been. Smart, determined, charismatic, and a bit more (okay, a lot more) outgoing. Even though Keith knew if he had stayed, things would have only gotten worse, there were times when he looked at Lance and felt that bitter surge of jealousy. And like a little kid who felt inferior, he wanted to knock Lance down a peg sometimes.

Keith bit back a laugh at the stupidity of it all. Was this seriously worth all the fighting? Was it worth nearly splitting up a friend group because of some shitty emotional baggage?

“I just…” Lance started to say. Keith watched Lance swallow, his Adam’s apple bobbing as he stalled on the words. “I just don’t know why you left.”

Keith winced. He wasn’t expecting that conversation. He had half expected one of their friends to have spilled the story to Lance. Allura, Pidge, and Shiro all knew the story. He wasn’t sure about Hunk. Hunk was so easygoing it probably didn’t occur to him to pry.

Keith let out a sigh. “It-”

A waiter arrived, his hands ladened with their dinner. “Alright, so I’ve got the shrimp ravioli,” he placed it down in front of Lance when Lance held up his hand. “And the burger,” he continued, sliding the second plate over to Keith. “Dinner of champions right there,” he added with a slight chuckle. Keith bit back a snarky remark, glaring at the retreating waiter’s back.

“Did you just get bullied by the waiter?” Lance asked with a forced chuckle, attempting to steer the conversation away from his previous question. He busied himself, fidgeting with his plate and avoiding eye contact. Keith rolled his silverware out of the fancy napkin tangle it was trapped in, a tad too aggressively.

“Sure as hell sounds like it,” he muttered. He popped a fry into his mouth and goddamn it that was good. His mood eased as he ate a few more. “About your question from before,” Keith could see Lance tense, his eyes laser-focused on his plate. His napkin was gone and Keith wondered where he’d put it. “It’s not like it’s a secret…”

“How is everything y’all?” Addison chirped as she manifested at the edge of their table. Both Keith and Lance jumped, eyes as wide as saucers. She giggled a little. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you two.”

“You’re good,” Lance assured her, recovering first. “Everything seems perfect so far, thanks,” Keith grunted in agreement. Satisfied, Addison flashed them another smile and disappeared, probably off to startle another table.

They sat awkwardly for a long moment, Lance playing with his pasta and Keith pretending to busy himself with his burger. This is worse than earlier, Keith thought. At least then it was intentional.

“Garrison and I didn’t mix,” Keith said finally. Lance froze, still staring at his pasta. “I was…” Keith trailed off, searching for the right word. Hopeless? Helpless? Pushed to the brink? “Miserable,” he decided, choosing the least pathetic sounding option. “I hated being there. When Shiro was gone and it was just me left behind,” he pressed his lips together. Inhaling deeply, he finished, “The Garrison doesn’t care about its students. Just their results. And I had too much going on to give a shit anymore.” He looked over at Lance, surprised to see his eyes locked on him. Ocean blue depths unfathomable. Keith squirmed a bit in his seat. He didn’t like how Lance looked at him, eyes impassive for once. It was too unsettling.

“I didn’t know,” Lance said softly. Keith’s body went rigid. “Garrison sucked in a lot of ways. But for me, it was everything. I didn’t think about how it would be for someone else.” Lance swirled his fork in the sauce on his plate. Keith wiped his palms - for some reason they were sweaty - along his jeans.

“It’s not like I made it known,” Keith sighed. “And we barely spoke.”

“Yeah, but,” Lance pressed his face into his free hand. “That doesn’t mean it was fair.”

“Definitely not.”

“And I feel like a complete asshole right now.”

“Glad you’re aware.”

Lance lifted his head, eyes narrowed as he shot daggers at Keith. “Not helping,” he snapped. Keith laughed, shaky but genuine.

“I thought it was.” Lance rolled his eyes but didn’t retaliate.

“I’m sorry,” he said. He was sitting up straighter now, his eyes serious. “I didn’t realize. And that’s not a good excuse, nor should it be considered one. I was an asshole and I made my problems be your problems too.”

Keith was a little thrown off by this. He hadn’t expected such a heartfelt apology from Lance. “It’s okay,” he said. “Truly. It was shitty that you had to put up with their comparisons. It wasn’t fair that they kept pitting you against me. You’ve made amazing accomplishments. No one should have made them or you feel less than.” Lance blinked, his expression stunned. For a minute, Keith worried that Lance would start to cry.

“Thank you.” Lance’s voice was small and shy. A little guarded. He popped a ravioli in his mouth. “Damn this is good,” he said, mouth full. Keith laughed, picking up his burger. The food was good. Almost good enough to forgive the ridiculous price. “I’m taking some of those,” Lance said suddenly, swiping a few fries off Keith’s plate. Keith let out an outraged sound and swatted at Lance’s hand the second time it crept near his plate. 

The rest of the dinner passed smoothly, Lance only managing to steal a few more fries before Keith nearly jabbed him with a fork. Once they’d cleared the air, it appeared they had a few things in common. When Keith had mentioned that he’d never been to the beach, Lance was distraught. He started gushing about the joys of beach weather, promising to take him one day.

“This summer,” he said, eyes shining. Lance was grinning so wide he looked like he was glowing. “I’ll take you to the beach. We could do a whole weekend trip.” Keith grinned, surprised to find that he was actually considering the idea. He’d never been one for the beach. There was no way Lance was getting him into the ocean.

“Let’s make it a group trip,” Keith suggested. “Allura would love to go.” Lance surged forward, jostling the table. Keith glanced over at where their empty plates had been pushed to the end, worried Lance’s sudden movement would knock them over.

“Oh my god that would be amazing!” Lance exclaimed. “We could rent out a beach house or something if we all pool together our cash. We could get sparklers, do picnics, barbeque…I can even teach you how to surf, Cowboy!” Keith spluttered a laugh.

“Cowboy?”

Lance shrugged. “It’s better than Mullet, right?” Keith grimaced.

“How are we doing now?” Addison asked, sliding up to the table. She scooped the plates up as she spoke. “Do we think we can stomach some dessert?”

“Uh…” Lance shot a look at Keith. The curiosity was clear on his face.

“Could we see the dessert menu?” Keith asked for him. Addison bobbed her head, chirping that she’d be right back with one.

“Thanks,” Lance said, looking slightly embarrassed. Keith shrugged.

“You know it’s going to be ridiculously expensive,” Keith pointed out. Lance dragged out a sigh, splaying his arms across the table dramatically.

“That’s true, but I like looking anyway. It’s like window shopping.”

Keith rolled his eyes. “So you torture yourself even when you know you shouldn’t?”

Lance looked like Keith had just said something incredibly dumb. “Well…yeah. Obviously.” Keith shook his head.

“You’re ridiculous.”

“You’re unimaginative,” Lance shot back. “Live a little. Enjoy the flavors of life.” He pulled his cup closer, blowing bubbles into the remaining liquid.

“Y’know,” Keith began, bemused by Lance's sulking. “I know someone who once got a cake slice for free at a place like this.” Lance squinted up at Keith.

“Seriously? How the hell did they do that?”

Keith smirked. “She faked an engagement with her friend.” Lance’s eyes widened, a startled huff of laughter bursting out of him.

“You’re kidding!” He laughed. “That’s amazing. Why have I never thought of that?” He paused, his head tilting to the side like he always does when he’s considering something. “Do you think that stuff actually works?” Keith considered the idea, fingers twisting on the ring he always wears on his right hand. He noticed Addison heading towards them, a menu in hand.

“Only one way to find out,” he said slyly. Lance’s expression shuffled from confusion to shock, landing on bewilderment as Keith slid out of his booth and knelt in front of Lance. Lance played the part well, hands flying up to his mouth in fabricated surprise - probably to hide the laughter plaguing him. His eyes glistened and Keith had to hand it to him, the guy could act.

“Lance,” Keith said, struggling to keep the snicker out of his voice. “Would you…” he blanked. He hadn’t thought this far ahead. Was he supposed to give a speech? What would make this more believable to the onlookers slowly beginning to tune in? 

Luckily, Lance saved him. “Yes!” He squealed, throwing his arms around Keith’s shoulders. It was the closest the two had ever been and Keith’s frantic mind stuttered. Lance pulled back, just far enough to press his forehead against Keith’s. His skin was warm and the faint scent of his cologne - citrus and bergamot - tickled Keith’s nose. Lance fluttered his lashes dramatically, a soft huff of laughter escaping before he could stop it. He bit his bottom lip, most likely to stop himself from laughing even more.

“Can I put it on?” He asked Keith, voice soft and sweet. Keith stared at him, in awe of the performance Lance was putting together. Damn, he really wants that cake huh?

“Uh, sure,” Keith muttered, his voice a bit too rough. He took Lance’s left hand, willing the ring to fit as he slid it onto Lance’s finger.

It was a perfect fit. Lance did chuckle then, loud enough for others to hear him. But it felt right. He cradled his hand against his chest, beaming at Keith as he did so.

“It’s perfect,” he cooed. He glanced up, feigning surprise as he took in the onlookers watching them. “Oh!” He exclaimed, pressing his hands to his cheeks. “This is so embarrassing,” he said, a bit too loudly to be casual. Keith bit the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing out loud. He noticed Addison hovering not too far away, her hands covering her mouth, the dessert menu dangling from the crook of her elbow. She looked so moved by their performance that Keith felt a little guilty for fooling her.

“Oh my gosh you two,” she breathed. “Would you like me to…I don’t know…take a picture?” Lanced nodded excitedly, passing her his phone. As she readied the camera, Lance wrapped his arms around Keith’s neck once more, his cheek pressing against Keith’s.

“This is gonna be one hell of a story to tell the others,” Lance said through his teeth, his grin so wide it could split his face in half.

“They’re never gonna believe us,” Keith muttered back, his own smile broad and genuine. The story was so far-fetched that Keith wasn’t even sure a picture would be enough to convince them.

Addison snapped their picture and returned the phone to Lance, who gushed about how “perfect” the photo was. Keith was rising to stand when Addison announced that she would be right back and walked off with a wink.

“I think it worked,” Lance hissed, eyes sparkling with glee.

“It better have, I didn’t put in all this effort for nothing,” Keith teased. Lance rolled his eyes. They both knew who put in the real work to convince the crowd. Lance took out his phone again, fingers flying across the screen. Before Keith could ask what he was doing, his phone pinged with a message alert.

Lance: Guess what???

The photo Lance sent to the group chat was surprisingly good. Maybe it was the camera on Lance’s phone or the lighting in the restaurant, but the two looked convincing. A little too convincing. Keith’s cheeks were flushed but he looked happy. Genuinely happy. Like it had been a real proposal gone right.

Pidge: You’re JOKING

Hunk: What happened during your dinner???

Allura: Mission…successful?

Pidge: Is this real? This has to be fake right? Did you two stage a photo to make us think you actually made up?

Hunk: That sounds like something Lance would do…

Shiro: Uh…Keith???

Lance: ;)

By the time Addison came back to their table, the two were laughing so hard, Lance was wiping tears from his eyes and Keith’s face was hurting from smiling so much. The cake she placed in front of them was chocolate, with a looping chocolate syrup, “Congratulations!” on the plate. At Lance’s suggestion, the two took turns feeding one another for their first bites.

The cake was dense and fudgy, with bursts of tart raspberry sauce between the layers. It was way too sweet to be something Keith would typically order, the chocolate icing coated his tongue and melted into a sugary syrup in the back of his throat. Keith watched the way Lance melted with every bite, his expression pure bliss as he shoveled bite after bite into his mouth.

“Best fake engagement ever,” Lance said around a mouthful of cake.

Keith smiled, knowing that the cake was probably worth every penny of the ridiculous price that it normally sold for. Later, be it tomorrow or the next day, Keith knew he would feel a bit guilty for conning the restaurant. But for now, Keith savored every last bite. 

[writingwife-83]

Hello! How do you imagine the first time Rey would wear Ben's sweater? 🦋

Yay for filling another long overdue prompt! 😅 Since I know you love my fic Somewhere Out There, I decided to write this little one shot as a bit of a prologue to that fic. It seemed to fit well. And I was obsessively listening to the song “I can’t hear it now” by Freya Ridings when I wrote this, so that’s where I got the inspiration for the title from. Go listen to the song, it’s got great angsty reylo vibes! 😭 (posted to AO3 but once again tumblr won’t let me link)

Silence So Soft

Rey woke with a gasp, so deep and violent that she nearly felt like she was choking, like surfacing from those dark waters on Ahch-To.

Sitting up, panting and resting her forehead on her knees, she blinked the blur of tears from her eyes. Just like she’d done the night before.

Just like she’d done every night for two full weeks.

She was exhausted, tired of feeling like she was grasping at life, trying to keep a tight grip, when it really felt easier to let go and slip into nothingness. She wished she didn’t feel this way, when the whole galaxy was rejoicing all around her. Everyone else had gotten what they wanted. She’d been left with only a gaping hole within her very soul.

The nightmares wouldn’t stop since she’d lost Ben. Sometimes he slipped away silently, like he had in reality. And sometimes he spoke, begging for her help as he faded and disappeared. Sometimes he reached for her and she couldn’t reach him, couldn’t even grasp his hand in those final moments. But no matter how she was forced to watch him go, she always woke in tears, feeling gutted and miserable.

Rey shivered a little, the perspiration beginning to evaporate from her skin and leaving her chilled. She stood slowly from the cot in her tent, knees still feeling a little weak. Everything on the base was quiet and still, and no doubt all were sleeping, so Rey quietly padded over to her little case of possessions and opened it in search of a cloak. But that wasn’t the first thing she saw.

She’s put this particular item away, almost afraid to see it and touch it at first. But she’d kept it… because she had to. She couldn’t let it go.

Rey gingerly lifted Ben’s black sweater from where it lay, holding it up and watching as a bit of moonlight shone through the gaping hole in the right side. She laid the heavy knit fabric on her lap, running it through her fingers, softer than she ever would have guessed. But then, of course it was. This was what laid against his skin, underneath everything harsh that he presented to the galaxy.

Unable to resist, she lifted it to her nose, breathing in deep and instantly feeling herself carried back to the moment where she’d woken in his arms. That sweet, blissful moment when she feared nothing and the future before her seemed bright and promising. It all came crashing in around her faster than she ever could have predicted.

Rey clutched the fabric tighter, feeling her eyes fill again at the bittersweet memories. And then, as quickly as the thought occurred to her, she was lifting the sweater up and over her head, letting it fall down around her, snuffing out the cold and sadness.

She released an audible sigh as the soft weight settled on her body. Somehow it also lifted what had been weighing heavily on her. All that loneliness faded, just a little. She could almost feel him again, feel that little crackle of energy when they’d connect through the Force. What she wouldn’t give to feel that prickle on the back of her neck at that very moment. And then she could almost feel his fingertips against that same spot, the way he’d supported her, even after he’d brought her back to life.

Crawling back into her cot, Rey laid down and snuggled into her pillow and blankets, feeling more at ease than she had in two weeks. She closed her eyes, somehow not minding the silence as much as she had before. There was a sort of peace in it, a clarity. She didn’t feel so alone anymore. Ben wasn’t really gone.

Rey’s eyes flew open again, wide and bright, darting back and forth as her thoughts flew in a hundred directions at once.

Of course…

Ben wasn’t really gone.

Rey hugged the sweater tighter against her body, her chin wobbling a little, but not in grief anymore. No, now it was replaced with determination. She knew what she had to do.

It was time to find Ben Solo.

[azrielslightintheshadows]

Hello everyone,

I know that it’s been a very long time since I posted. A lot of you might hate me for this and I’m so sorry.

I’ve always been a person who makes up stories in their head, I would zone out even if I was at a public place with friends and family and I would just make up stories with fictional characters etc. So I decided to start writing those stories, I thought this was a way for me to stop zoning out. I really tried my best, and when I had some serious family problems I stopped as most of you know. Then when everything got better I decided to pick up from where I left off. But as I wrote those stories I started zoning out way more often than before, I almost crashed my car twice before I deleted tumblr from my laptop and phone. I focused on my university, job, family and friends.

At this point I want to apologise for not letting you know before deleting the app. It was a horrible thing to do. I love all of you, your support made me feel good about myself again and I feel like I betrayed you.

Today I saw all the messages of love and worry and I started crying because I don’t deserve it after what I did.

I will start writing again, I promise I will finish the princess series even if no one is here to read it. It might take some time until I start writing again because I want to be okay mentally, but I promise to be more active starting next month.

Also I was planning to start writing fiction about characters of other series like Rina Kent’s legacy of gods etc so please let me know what you think.

If most of you hate me now and don’t want to see my work anymore I understand and I deserve it.

Love you all anyway ❤️

[aealzx]

Better Genes part 29.1

Part 1 of 3 extra, illustrated writing additions to the Better Genes comic.

Takes place between page 29 and 30.

Contains: Use of sedatives, character injury, blood, TV Medicine, TV Science, panic attack, mutation body horror, injured eye, severely sprained ankle, overall body pain

Comic: Start     pg 26-29  

Writing:  Part 2    Part 3

____________

I got a couple comments about being excited for monster Donnie content (despite mentioning that there wasn’t going to be much) and felt kind of bad for not having much. ;v; There was no way I was going to add another 30 pages or more to the comic though, especially since I’ve never even tried to do fight scenes in comic form before. X’D

So instead I wrote 8 pages and drew 3 more flat colored pics as a sort of middle ground.

Talking with my platonic waifu, since the comic is on tumblr I’m also going to put the writing on tumblr instead of AO3 despite it being long because cross platform content can be annoying. Everything will be split into 3 posts, underneath a read more break to hopefully not stretch the screen a horrendous amount.

____________

(Story and drawing under the cut)

With a quick swish of his temporarily manifested blade, Leo opened a portal to the part of the sewers that was a short distance from where he’d sent Donnie. He didn’t want to pop in right next to him and startle him into attacking them after all. It would be better if they could sneak up on him and pop a few rounds of sedatives into him first. Unfortunately, when Leo stepped through the portal he was greeted with Casey’s back coming in hot directly at his face, having gotten bodily launched across the sewer tunnel by Donnie’s clawed hand. With a startled, halfway muffled yelp, Leo dodged to the side slightly and flung an arm up quick enough to catch Casey and help him regain his footing instead of crashing into the others filtering through the portal as well.

“Alright there Case?” Leo asked with a forced grin, trying to remain optimistic despite the scene before him being the unwanted route. So much for sneaking up on their brother.

“Sorry Master-! Ah… Sorry Leo. He noticed we were following him and got angry,” Casey babbled hurriedly. His upbringing made him quick to give an update on the situation, which also ended up answering Leo’s unasked question about what had ticked Donnie off.

“Yeah, that sounds like Donnie,” Leo chuckled, removing his hand from supporting Casey now that he had his balance back. “He always was quick to lash out when we got in his space when he didn't want us there. Too bad it’s time for his medicine, so we can’t give into his cranky wishes for alone time,” he added dramatically, gesturing to the injection pens Mikey had now that he and April had joined them as well. “We got the antibodies, so we’re ready to take him down and bring him back home. Thanks for sticking it out until now.”

Casey’s expression turned into a sheepish yet grateful smile, but before he could respond Raph’s bellowing voice echoed through the tunnel from close by.

“LEO! You didn’t mention he’d grown another meter!” Raph complained emphatically as he was grappling Donnie’s mutated mouth with ninpo covered hands. He didn’t fancy getting bitten by Donnie’s new set of fangs, considering his original set of teeth already did enough damage when he was legitimately angry. And if Raph knew anything about Donnie’s levels of anger, then he would guess Donnie was beyond pissed at the moment. That combined with his new size made grappling him a losing battle, Raph’s heels dragging paths in the dirt as he was shoved backwards.

“I figured that was rather self explanatory considering what he got infected from,” Leo sassed back, loading one of the sedative darts into the gun and taking aim. He was hesitant to fire with Raph directly in the path, but luckily for both of them a quick snap from Splinter’s tail saved Raph from being Donnie’s new chew toy. The forward momentum was broken, and Raph quickly opened his hands as Donnie’s head was knocked to the side.

As April rushed forward, her name belted from her lips, Leo figured he should pass a word of caution to them all just so it would be explicitly known. “Try not to piss him off too much please. We need him rather still for Mikey to administer the antibodies,” he warned, pulling the trigger on the tranquilizer gun when he felt he wasn't going to hit anyone but the intended target. He ended up wincing in apology the dart smacked Donnie in the side of the nose, causing him to recoil slightly from the sting before shaking the dart dart off and turning to snarl at Leo.

“...Maybe you shouldn’t shoot him in the face then,” Casey commented lightly with a weak chuckle, a slight tease, and an analytical pause for an opening before he ran forward to join the fray once more.

“Okay, so aiming in real life is a lot different from video games,” Leo defended with a sheepish shrug. Donnie apparently thought that was enough of an offense to warrant revenge, for he started to charge towards Leo, causing him to start backing up. “Mikey, I need a weight estimate.”

“Got it!” Mikey chirped, securing the injection pens into his belts and darting forward to dash towards Donnie before feinting to the side. Considering Donnie was way too tall for him to grapple anything but his arms or legs now, Mikey had coiling chains wrap around Donnie’s middle as additional ones helped fling him overhead. Twisting in the air, Mikey latched onto the handholds he’d created and used them and his momentum to heave Donnie into a rather gentle toss a few meters away. “Uhhhh….He’s kinda like one of those tiny smart car things?” Mikey called back to Leo after landing on his feet again in a crouch. “When do I start poking him?”

A smart car? That was a weird comparison. But it actually made sense when Leo remembered Mikey’s usual choice of throwing arsenal. But that definitely wasn’t something he knew the weight of by memory. Which meant he was digging his phone out of his shell for a quick internet look up. “As soon as you’re confident you can hold it in place for 8 seconds,” Leo answered, half distracted by the phone. About 700 kilograms? Well, it was better than a complete guess. He’d just have to play on the safe side and maybe do one or two doses less than calculated for that weight. Loading another sedative dart as he calculated the maximum quantity he was allowed to use in his head, he tried to push away the usual second guessing his brain did. Based on the tests he’d done in Donnie’s lab with the left over blood sample, the mutated physique caused him to have a slightly accelerated metabolism rate with the sedatives, and therefore he should be able to safely use 8 darts before he risked an overdose. Now that he had a set number Leo raised the gun and fired another dart, stabbing Donnie in the crook of his shoulder. 

That made two.

This felt too slow. Half of his team was already worn down somewhat, and he was taking too long to aim and wait for an opening with all of them swarming around Donnie like flies on old cheese. Every time they tried to break away from him though he was immediately lashing out at one of them, causing the others to rush back in to support. Sliding another dart into the gun’s slot, Leo started walking towards his brother, hoping that closing the distance would make it easier and faster to hit him with more sedatives. It would also be great if he didn’t have to reload the gun after every single shot. But Donnie apparently hadn’t made the gun for rapid fire. Unusual for him honestly. Taking aim, Leo’s focus was split as he pulled the trigger when Raph gave an unusually pain filled yelp. Donnie’s new tail had caught him in the side of the head, close enough to the tunnel wall to bounce him off the surface slightly. It was enough to cause Leo to suck in a tense breath, knowing that Raph’s scar was fragile, and look towards him before the trigger was fully pulled. Consequently, the third shot ended up missing, crashing into the opposite wall and probably snapping the needle. That was fine. That’s why they filled an excessive amount of darts. There were more important issues at the moment.

“Raph?” Leo called in a nervous question, seeing his older brother pushing a palm against his right eye.

“I’m okay!” Raph assured, keeping his palm in place until the sting subsided, then pulled his hand away. While he checked to see if there was any blood on his fingers, Donnie’s back foot knocked him over and ended up using him as a pedestal to stand on while he avoided April’s swinging bat. Raph’s breath left him in a huff, and he wrapped his arms around Donnie’s toes to try and relieve the pressure on his chest.

Figuring he should help Raph out, Leo dashed forward as Mikey lept into a split arc over the top of Donnie, apparently having the same goal. Splinter was focused on keeping Donnie from hurting the others, knocking his clawed hand away when he swiped at April. “Boy! You better watch where you're swinging those!” April hollered, having ducked and shielded her head before realizing Splinter had protected her.

“Try not to hurt him too much, it’s still Donnie!” Leo hollered in return, rushing to dive underneath Donnie in a slide while also pointing the tranquilizer gun at him half blindly and pulling the trigger while barely missing getting swatted instead. Being this close to him it would be hard to miss. Or at least he hoped as such. But he also needed to check and make sure Raph was okay. Skidding to a stop next to Raph, Leo allowed Raph to use his ninpo to shove Donnie’s foot off himself before he took a glancing look at his squinting eye.

[bandydear]

I’ve been reading your tlgbf tlgbl fic, and am absolutely obsessed!! Where did you get the inspirations for dyke Jackie? I love how you’ve written her and her queerness

So, I prescribe to the theory that Jackie had some inclinations about her homosexuality out there in the wild and that's why she's parading around in sweater vests and limp wrists. That the high femme presentation we see in the pilot is more of a gender and social performance than who she is. And, I explored the people pleaser elements that lingered behind in that.

She compliments Nat in the Pilot that she admires how true to herself Natalie is which means that Jackie is not true to herself. She feels the pressure of expectation and lives within that expectation instead of her truth. We are never given a "truth that could crash an airplane" from Jackie. What she says is that she used to sneak downstairs and watch The Color of Night so she could pause it at Bruce Willis's wang.

For research for the fic, I watched Color of Night (the shit I do for art...). Bruce Willis's flaccid dong is there for like, five frames. And, it's not impressive like she claims it to be. You know what that movie actually has a lot of? Naked women and lesbian sex. Jackie's gay.

I know a lot of butch/futch/even high femme dykes who began their journeys presenting heterofemme realness and rejected it when they made their way down the rainbow brick road. Jackie very much gives me those vibes. Like, she has gay energy, but also a very "useless gay man" energy.

I think that finding out "x amount" of her teammates are some kind of queer and that the Very Hetero Sport she's been shielding herself with is uhhhhh Not That is part of what leads her down the path of self-discovery.

She's also shredded. Jackie canonically has an 8-pack and that's interesting because in the 90's, muscle tone was seen as something undesirable for women. (Now, I know that the show is made Now, where the aesthetic ideals are different, but if it's in the text it counts.)

Anyway, this has all been said before in other tumblr posts about Jackie being gay. I'm sure you're asking about why I wrote her as a futch service top instead of say, a femme pillow princess?

It has to do with her character arc. In S1 of Yellowjackets, Jackie's arc is one of nihilism and regression. The only thing that is keeping her alive in this survival situation is her love for Shauna, and when she learns of Shauna's resentment, she loses the will to live. Literally. Dies of a broken heart.

Jackie cannot survive in an environment without love. And, she struggles with survival instincts in general. Which is what makes her a great foil to Nat, who cannot help but survive, and, ironically, dies in S2 of too much love. The moment Nat stopped being cynical and nihilistic she doomed herself.

Two characters in direct opposition cannot exist so therefore they must either kill one or the other other--or change each other to live in harmony. I chose the latter. Jackie softens Nat and Nat hardens Jackie. They meet in the middle. If Jackie becomes hard, and becomes someone who can survive, what does that look like? What's the funniest possible way to get to this point?

Make Jackie the one who builds the shelter. Take this ineffectual, limp wristed twink and show her the way towards self-sufficiency through trades. Her home was broken beyond repair, so she learns how to fix it on her own. The literal is metaphorical and the metaphorical is literal.

So, now that I've explained:

Why Jackie is gay

Why Jackie fixes houses

Now, "why a service top"?

I touch on it in the text, but I don't think she's solely that. I do think that even after coming out, if she was experimenting with people who weren't Shauna she wouldn't allow herself to be physically vulnerable with them. It would cause a panic attack. She has a very Protestant energy and receiving pleasure as a part of sex would probably give her like 5 different mental breaks.

Jackie doesn't enjoy sex with Jeff (oral and hand stuff count as sex) not just because she's gay, but because she's too self-aware of how she's being perceived to enjoy her body.

On the other hand, she is a chronic people pleaser--though Lazy, so I knew she couldn't jump into this with both feet. If Jackie had slept with the girl in chapter 1 it wouldn't have gone well, and it would have been super awkward and unsatisfying for both parties. It's the envy at seeing Nat enjoying herself, and finally being in a safe space to relax a little that allows her to explore sensuality. Still, I don't think she'd let herself be touched in the same way.

If she had, as planned, shared a room with Shauna at Rutgers, I could see her being in a much more comfortable sexual role. Because Shauna was her safe space. But, I could also see her bringing a lot of her own baggage into that situation, and it quickly becoming toxic. I don't think they'd work romantically out of their "platonic" relationship in school, because it had already broken and festered by the Pilot.

Anyway! That's the impetus for Jackie's dykery. I hope that clarified some things. There are other folks out there who have come away with other, valid, and cool conclusions, but these are the ones I came to with my own research and experience. Thanks again for asking!

[walnutofthedead]

hey! I was wondering if you could do a fuuta x gn reader general relationship stuff? I hope you have a good day!!

OFC!!! I TRIED WRITING THIS LIKE 6 TIMES AND IT KEPT DELETING AND CRASHING THE EDITOR HEP,, BUT ANYWAYS HERE YOU GO !!! fuutas so silly goofy

-absolute tsundere you cant change my mind

-he'll avoid you for a bit after realizing his feelings, he just can't take the vulnerability he feels when he gets those butterflies every time he sees you!

-the avoiding of course doesnt last forever though! He'll eventually have enough and work the courage up to wait outside your cell door. He tries too look natural, ignoring the burning sensation in his cheeks as he looks to the floor. The first few times you see him, he'll use some lame excuse like mixing up the cells or smth, but eventually he'll tell you the real reason why he's there

-He'll undermine his feelings when confessing, saying something along the lines of "I know it's fuckin' stupid, but I think I might like you.." and hes all flustered n nervous when telling you its honestly adorable

-he looks cool and collected for the most part but internally hes freaking the fuck out like "what if they dont feel the same?" "what if this ends badly?" but all of his worries mean nothing when you look him in the eyes and tell him you return his feelings <3

-gets pretty clingy after that- not in like an annoying way, but more of a "I just love you and want you to be safe" kind of way! he honestly just wants to spend as much time with you as possible! Of course he'll still give you personal space though :)

-during interrogations he'll probably preach to es why you should be deemed innocent...

-he gives the BEST cuddles !! he just holds you as tight as possible without hurting you and envelopes you in a loving, warm embrace :)

-basically lives with you at this point, he sleeps with you(in a WHOLESOME way.) and tells you and everyone else it's just to protect you, but it's pretty clear he just wants some love :((

moral of the story: write your posts in google docs before on tumblr!(also give fuuta a hug please)

im so sorrythis was short i wrote a longer one but it got deleted and i like cried vghefhgrjsv

[goldfishlover73]

27 and 29?

27: nervous about posting a fic

Every single one? I'm waiting for those "this is bad and you should feel bad" with everything I write. Especially with my Gai centric/rare pair stories. I want to do right by the characters and I want to make sure they are right (and good). I don't want to miss something.

TLDR: I overthink everything.

But the real answer to your question is Mago

Mago was a story I reluctantly posted. I wrote this story and held on to the finished work for years. I 'wanted' to post but also was very scared. Between the OC and talk of depression/suicide...I wanted to keep both sakumo and Hoshi safe.

But you, tea, might be thinking of that one story that hasn't been posted. And it will remain unposted.

The world isn't ready for it. And I'm not ready to post it.

29. Snippet from an unposted story or something removed.

I'm on my phone so I don't have access to that one, so here's one from isekai

Under the cut because I'm not a monster

This is from my isekai "that time I got hit by a bus and ended up in ninja land where I stole your girl" (or some thing like that)

Kakashi is a recovering drug user. This is a scene that was removed for a few reasons, but I liked it.

Kakashi starts relapsing and searches for Sakura, but she's away in Suna. He ends up finding Sasuke, who helps him out.

Copying to Tumblr removes all my italics.

... Good luck

Kakashi forced himself to breath through his nose as his entire body pulsed. “Your eye…it can do something for this? Yeah?” Everything hurt. Everything. 

Kakashi lifted his head, watching Uchiha move around his kitchen with easy, preparing tea. It was weird.

“You did this to yourself?” It wasn’t really a question. Kakashi didn’t answer. Uchiha didn’t need one. “No.” It was like a nail in his coffin. Uchiha glanced up at him. “You must know the pain.”

Part of Kakashi knew this and the other half wanted to punch Uchiha. To take his sword and ram it through his gut. To take that tea cup and throw scalding tea at him and then bludgeon him with the tea kettle. Even though he knew the other man could easily take him down.

Anger and rage built up in Kakashi’s gut as Uchiha sat down at his kotatsu and carefully made tea.

For one.

Kakashi’s lip curled as Uchiha sipped tea.

“How long?” Uchiha asked after a few minutes. Kakashi was silent. His body pulsing painfully. 

“Forever.” Kakashi mumbled.

Uchiha studied him for a moment before blinking. He nodded. “Then we wait.

“Forever.”

If you're still here...a very weird treat. From the wip vault circa 2010. NaruSaku modern day au

There was a heavy rap on Sakura’s bedroom window. She bolted out of bed. She tumbled sluggishly out of bed, spinning around almost drunkenly before she realized where the sound was coming from.

The green glow of the window. Silhouetted was Naruto with a slightly panicked look on his face. Moved quickly to the window, stopping when she eyed the clock on her night stand.

3:23 a.m.

“Naruto-” She opened the window, “What in the hell-”

“RememberwhenItoldyouI’dshowyoutheuniverse?” He said quickly, lowly, not taking a breath as he grabbed her arms and roughly pulled her down. “Now. We go now.” His voice almost absorbed by a low hum.

Sakura pulled back, mainly so he didn’t try to pull her through the window pane. “Naruto-”

“Sakura, we have to go.” He came through the window and grabbed her by the waist. The sound was getting louder and the green lights started to flash.

“What’s...what’s going on?” She slithered out of her window into the dry mulch. She looked around. The neighborhood looked like it did most nights, except for the loud hum and the green, and now blue lights, flashing wildly.

“The planet is being invaded and we have to leave now.” Naruto roughly grabbed her arm and started to drag her towards his house.

“Invaded?” Sakura tripped over a rock, almost crashing down. Naruto didn’t stop. “Invaded by what?”

It was then that giant fireballs started falling from the sky.

Naruto stopped and looked up to the sky. “The Akatsuki.” They stood there, frozen as the fireballs became more numerous.

[inventedfangirling]

bad buddy fandom getting-to-know-you meme!

ah finally after a gazillion years i've been able to get around to doing this after being tagged by the ever sweet @fiercynn , so lemme straightaway get down to it.

note: i consider "fanworks" to pretty much everything people create related to a fandom, including but not limited to meta/analysis/discussion, gifs, fanvids/edits/fancams, filk, fanart, fanfic, fan food, fan crafts, etc.

name and whatever you want to share about yourself

hello there, i'm a 24 year old gray-ace panromantic desi on the romance positive end of the arospec (im still undergoing the wonderful but also often difficult and long journey of discovering myself so this is subject to change :3), i prefer going by my username so i'm not sharing my name.

when did you watch bad buddy/join the fandom?

i watched bad buddy exactly 3 months ago on the 15th of May, 2023. i watched all the episodes all on the same day and i know the date because after finishing the show i sent a 7 minute long audio note gushing about the show to my best friend. i ADORED it that much. and that's where all of this started. i loved the show so much and the lack of people i knew irl who were interested meant i had to find other people in the fandom to freak out with. i kept posting one after another favourite bad buddy edit of mine on my twitter page, gushing about it, but i got barely any response and that's when i reminded myself that tumblr exists and i should get back on here. and that's how i made this account 2 weeks after i watched the show and voila here i am surrounded by people who are as crazy about the show as i am and i couldn't be more delighted about it :')

favorite ship(s)

patpran and inkpa ofc

favorite character(s)

i love pat with all my heart, the man he ends up becoming along the course of the show is one of my most favorite portrayals of any man ever BUT pran is my actual favorite, he is my baby, (somehow both) my elder and younger brother and my best friend and he has my whole heart. his love, his hesitance, his anxiety, his bravery, his dimples, his FOREHEAD, his striped shirts, his precious heart i would DIE for him no questions asked.

favorite episode(s)

episode 11. each segment had something for the heart, i adored every single second of it...the sheer volume of beaut quotes from this episode is mind blowing! ("being with you already feels like freedom", "i can be anywhere as long as i have you", "we have been happier a lot too", "thankyou for trying to make a silly guy like me happy..." "i wrote this song for him", "one man can't change the world, but this world can't change me too"), and the soft loving looks of adoration making me clutch my chest, but also there was the quintessential patpran banter and bad buddy humour and wisdom i LOVE this episode with all my heart.

episode 5 is perfection. it comes second for me, but that kiss will always be number 1 <3

favorite scene(s)

rooftop kiss, balcony phone call, episode 7 ending when pat comes to save the day and the play, episode 11 red shirts commitment expression scene, and the final credits and post credits scene

one thing you would change about the show if you could

i wished the gangs didnt bully eo or anybody else even in the beginning, i get it shows growth but still i wished that was shown differently. also i wish we got a conversation where they talk about the guitar. and while we're here i wish it was somehow longer, i could have watched ohmnanon be patpran for HOOOURS.

what are your some of your favorite fanworks made by other people?

traffic was slow for the crash years by @fiercynn aka the creator of this meme. i absolutely adored every single second of the fic. despite it giving me a WORLD of pain. all the pain made it more beautiful and everything was worth it in the end. like i said before you took a great thing and made it even better <3

every piece of art that @hereforlou comes up with. you are a GEM!

all of nanons gorgeous gifsets!!

same page video edit that even p'aof tweeted about. SO good.

enchanted (aka patpran's official song) and other patpran edits by this same SO very talented editor

mudhal nee mudivum nee - another beautiful edit but desi so its even better <3

this super clever edit of patpran to message in a bottle. it's an instant serotonin booster for me.

(if you create fanworks) what are your favorite fanworks that you’ve made?

you can hear it in the silence - bad buddy bet era fic (the only one i've written till now)

my bad buddy textposts collection

my pran and pat's growth posts

this post that took me 20 mins to write but is one of my fav things ive written about the show

my long treatise of bet era patpran that took me a week!

list of accounts (hopefully i haven't forgotten any) whose meta and analysis and brainrot i absolutely adore- @miscellar , @telomeke-bbs , @grapejuicegay , @aroceu, @dudeyuri, @dribs-and-drabbles, @dimplesandfierceeyes, @sharingfandoms, @waitmyturtles, @ranchthoughts, @lurkingteapot, @lurkingshan, @thegayneurodivergentagenda, @kenmakaashi, @absolutebl, @charthanry, @bengiyo, @mahuhumaling, @panickedbisexualwatchesbl, @jemmo, @patspran, @fiercynn, @midnightfreeway, @fierceeyesanddimples and a couple more im sure ive missed. it was {and continues to be} a pleasure reading their thoughts about the show (or any other show that we've mutually watched).

a song that makes you think of bbs (the ones in the show don’t count lol)

message in a bottle because of this edit

daylight cos of this edit

enchanted, because of the infinite edits we've got from it and if im not wrong pat ohm has acknowledged it too

and basically all other romantic songs in the history of romance i guess :3

alrighty then i think i'm done with this tag. this was a LOT of fun to compile <3

[yolowritter]

Volpibug AU (better title pending)

So, it's this time of the month again, for me to drop a post in the tumblr void and then vanish again until next called upon! But! This one...this one is good! Like, "I'd need > 50k words of worldbuilding to write this" kind of good!

Quick story time: I recently wrote a Lilanette ficlet based on an ask I saw here on Tumblr. I won't get into the hows and whys, it's on my Ao3 acc (I have the same username). Anyway so while I was writing it, I added the line "and with her (Lila) necklace being all too magical" as a little easter egg, to say that she actually has the Fox Miraculous in this AU. Then...then my brain Did A Thing™. So it's a full AU now. Here's the context! Or at least...part 1, meaning the pre-story setup and up to the "Volpina" episode itself. I'll do a part 2 of this post to talk about the Lilanette lovesquare, because it keeps me up at night and I will share that with all of you very soon! Since Tomas Astruc has so gracefully and respectfully decided to actively depict 1940s Paris in S5, I am shamelessly using that mistake to make something I think is cool! So, while Fu and Marianne were in Paris, there was someone who helped them hide. A young woman from Italy, whose family had moved to France so her father could avoid the draft. The three become friends in the short time they know eachother, and she happens to learn that Fu is carrying a box full of magical little creatures with him. Therefore, she understands they need to escape, and promptly decides to try and sneak them out of Paris. But...we get to the scene where Fu and Marianne are being chased (the one from Evolution), only she's with them, and they're losing ground. So she begs Fu to let her take the Fox Miraculous and distract the soldiers while they run away, promising to come find them once it was safe. And so, with little time left to spare, Fu makes the gamble and passes Trix to her. She then tranforms and promptly makes an illusion to let him and Marianne get away before also going to hide. For the remainder of the War, she stays in France and devotes her time to help whoever she can escape, through conjuring minor illusions and such. She ends up being an unsung hero, and some years later she and her family move back to their old home in Italy. So...you're probably asking me what in the name of Gabriel Agreste's secret butterfly room does this have to do with Lilanette? Well, said woman (who I've yet to think of a good name for) is actually Lila's grandmother! I know, huge shock! Her superhero name? Why, Volpina of course! When Fu and Marianne return to Paris to come find her, she's unfortunately long gone. Therefore, we have 3 missing Miraculous. The Peacock, Butterfly, and the Fox. They stay in Paris (and yes this time they didn't split up, because I want to make Marianne happy okay?) like in canon, deciding to protect the remaining Kwami rather than go around the world searching for a woman they can't find. Conclusion, Trixx stays with Lila's family. Now, our beloved liar's grandmother has a daughter, who marries a man and also has a daughter, Lila. Listen, I do not want to open the can of worms of "Lila has at least 3 moms actually" because as cracky as it is...just no...not until they explain it clearly. Anyway her mom's marriage falls through, and through this time Lila stays with her grandmother, where she happens upon an old necklace she's held onto all this time. Cue Trixx showing up again, and Lila's grandmother explaining what a Miraculous is, and telling her the stories of her and the Fox Kwami's adventures. I'd assume this happens pretty much right before Lila comes to Paris, for a few reasons I'll explain in a bit. Anyway, Grandma Rossi gives Lila a crash course on how the Miraculous works, and swears her to secrecy, since nobody can know about Trixx, before passing the necklace to her when it's for her and Madame Rossi to come to Paris. The conclusion?

Lila isn't lying in the "Volpina" episode. She really is the descendant of a superheroine, and very proud about it because she loves her grandmother! It's also worth mentioning that because I genuinely hate how 2-dimensional they've made her in canon, this version of Lila is an actual character with positive and negative influences in her life. She still barely sees her mother and craves being the center of attention, but above all, through her grandmother's stories she got to see her friendship with Trixx, and is obsessed with the idea of having such a genuine connection with another person. So, she's not a manipulative psycho who's in it for the fame and glory, rather she just wants people to like her and hates being ignored or brushed aside, as her mother so often is forced to do because of her busy schedule. Lila may not be the most empathetic, kind or gentle soul around, but she's not sadistic or heartless like in the show. Now, when she transfers to her new school she's eager to make friends, so naturally she uses her cunning to quickly get people to bring up their interests and then spins stories of her relating to those things. For example, Juleka really likes Jagged Stone's music? Why, Lila has had a front-row seat to one of his concerts and absolutely loved it! She "knows a guy who knows a guy" who might be able to get them tickets if he ever comes to Paris, and hey, they should totaly go together sometime! Stuff like that, to become popular. She goes about her day telling the same lies she did in "Volpina" (Alya mentions a few at the beginning). Cue Adrien Agreste, locally famous teenage model, coming in with a book that has superheroes all over it. Lila is very interested in making friends with him, for obvious reasons.

When Ladybug shows up to scold her for lying about being a superhero, Lila barely holds back from transforming then and there, only because her grandmother had made her promise to not reveal the Miraculous to anyone. Unfortunately...that only gets her as far as being out of view before deciding to go for it anyway, despite Trixx protesting. Same exact thing with the fake meteor shower happens, and Hawkmoth is very curious as to what exactly is happening. Gabriel, being Gabriel, decides to wait and see what's going on. Ladybug and Chat show up, and she immediatelly accuses Lila of being an Akuma. Lila of course has absolutely no idea what those are because it is her first day here, but the more Ladybug scolds her the more she realizes that it's nothing good. Chat steps in as he did in the episode, defending her because Marinette is not being very logical right now. Long story short, Volpina asks about what exactly has been going on in Paris, and they give her the rundown on what Akuma are and who Hawkmoth is. Understanding this, Lila thinks to herself that Trixx...had a point. She probably shouldn't have exposed herself like this, and needs to find a way to get out of this situation. How does she do this? Oh, by pretending to be Akumatized of course! She conjures an illusion of Hawkmoth and then jumps Ladybug (mostly because she's mad at her for embarrassing her earlier) and then loses on purpose, "accidentally" falling off a ledge as she detransforms. Thankfully she's fine, and promptly thanks the heroes for saving her. Ladybug agrees to be "friends" with her, and is more focused on the personal situation than the lack of evil magical butterfly. I'm sure that won't affect the story in any major way. If you couldn't tell, I'm being sarcastic! Chat takes Lila back to school and tries to comfort her by saying she's kinda cool, and Lila lies to Adrien when he "happens to walk by her", telling him that she really wasn't ever a hero. Eventually, Marinette comes back to school just as Adrien is agreeing to be Lila's friend, and promptly decides that it's better to keep her "rival" close, telling Adrien that she's also his friend. Of course, he's overjoyed at having made two whole friends today (Nino is fondly shaking his head in the background), and that's the end of "Volpina". For those curious, yes the Grimoire still goes to Fu because that scene doesn't change. The only different thing is that both Fu and Gabriel suspect the real Fox Holder to be in Paris, but only Fu knows that this Miraculous has been missing since Nooroo and Duusu just...wouldn't know that. Tbh, I really want to write this AU sometime soon, but I'd also like to hear your thoughts on it! I know this post is mostly just a huge backstory rant, the real good stuff comes in part 2! Anyway, time for me to disappear yet again, but I'll be back soon with more!

[zeltqz]

niyaaaa do u have any tips for people who wanna get into fic writing? 👀

i don’t really get how the whole posting format for fics works on here tbh 😭 and like your info area it’s so cool

YEAH OFC!! btw dm me your username so i can follow and support you <3

tip 1- the posting format isnt that hard to get used to actually its just you create a tumblr text post and then copy and paste your fic onto it, add the tags and stuff then post it. if you want to add banners, headers and stuff to make it look better then go ahead, just add images to the text post

tip 2- the info area is the same as above, just add pictures of your choice etc to the text post, add your information, name, age, fav things etc and then to link posts to your post, highlight where u want the link to go, then copy the link of the post u want linked then press the hyperlink that looks like two chains linked together when you highlight the text if that makes sense? sounds like a lot but its rlly not i promise haha

tip 3- always type your fics on other apps like word or google docs since they have an auto save feature!! i dont reccomend typing your fics on tumblr since one if the app crashes, it doesn't automatically save your work so everything you wrote will get deleted (some versions of tumblr do have autosave, my laptop has it but my phone and iPad doesn't, so i dont rely on it)

tip 4- idk if you want tips on actual fic writing or just how to get your fics onto tumblr but ill help you with that anyway. with me when i write fics i always imagine it out in my head. theres some of my fics where i just went with the flow and wrote wgatever came to mind and those are the fics i hate the most because they dont rlly make sense to me. theyre always so random and it just seems rushed and bad.

i picture my fics like a scene in my head and whatever i want the character to do, think, say or feel i write that shit down asap. i use other online sources to help get more descriptive like the emotion theasurus <- honestly one of my favourite things to use ever, they have so much body language to use for every emotion in the damn book

dialogue is also something i find difficult. i've improved i personally feel like but its still hard for me especially if im writing a new character. i never want to make the character seem OOC so i do lots of research before hand. i normally use the wiki to read up on a characters personality.

for example i'll use ran for this since he's like 99% of my account lmao. in the wiki, he's described as "naturally whimsical toward others which makes him inscrutable" though ran doesnt have many scenes in the manga (which i hate bc i love him sm) its impossible to actually write him down to a tee so i use that naturally whimsical description to make him playful, charismatic, carefree etc, going off what little information i have with him.

getting a characters personality down is what can make or break a dialogue. for me when im reading a fic of a character and their dialogue is so OOC it puts me off and i dont even wanna read. so i apply my same fic icks to myself and think if I don't like seeing this and that in a fic, why would I incorporate those in my fics and have ppl get put off it if they have the same fic icks as me?

hope that makes sense!!

tip 5- dont rush yourself at all. i used to rush a few of my fics and i just ended up hating it so much after and fought bck the urge to delete them so many times but then i'd see people's comments and realise i was being too harsh on myself. i'd keep them up but i'd just hate seeing them get attention.

rushing only makes you hate your work and the quality of your work will decline if you are not in the right headspace.

thats also why i have the don't rush me thing in my rules because not only is it annoying to see people constantly asking for updates, it also makes me mad because i know i'll just put out a piece of garbage if i did rush.

also another tip don't give yourself deadlines!! if you know your writing consistency can be a little sloppy, don't tell your followers that you're going to upload every so and so day. if something happens and you miss the deadline, you'll feel bad and rush something out and most times out of ten, a rushed fic doesn't do well. so take your time and don't rush.

tip 6- dont listen to what other people say or feel obligated to write something you don't wanna. establish your boundaries!! for example, from day one i started this blog i said im accepting requests but i will not write anything to do with non-con, incest or minors. i made sure that was out there so i wouldn't feel uncomforable writing anything i wasn't comfy with.

there are people on this app that may like your writing and request you to write something for them. you are not obligated to write anything for anyone! don't feel like you have to just because they asked nicely.

if you want to accept requests you can im not saying you shouldn't, im saying don't feel like you have to. you always have a choice. its your blog.

tip 7- remember this isn't a job. you're allowed to take breaks, allowed to have a personal life. don't feel like you need to be updating every day. i used to think i was obligated to be uploading consistently at least every week because i was obsesssed with engagement and seeing peoples comments and was scared if i took a break ppl will unfollow. now i honestly don't care. i'm not active as much as i used to because of school and that's fine! if ppl want to leave, let them. don't feel like you're forced to keep being active in order to keep your follower count stable.

tip 8- this app can get really toxic sometimes. luckily enough i've only had one toxic anon in my inbox and i've been on this app for a year. some people have so many, some ppl get harrassed etc. if that happens to you just be prepared since there's no actual way to find out who's behind anons. you can turn off your anon options which means if ppl want to inbox you something then their account will be showing. some people arent comfortable with that and that's fine! i keep mine on because i want people to feel comfortable on my page.

just remember though if you ever feel like this app is getting overwhelming take breaks! for the sake of your mental health take breaks. i know so many writers on here that took breaks and came back healthier and stronger.

i feel like this tip goes for social media in general. as much as i love social media im aware how unhealthy it is. breaks are so important for you. remember that.

i can't think of anymore tips right now but if i have some more i will edit the post and add it on.

if u have anymore questions about the tumblr posting format dm me and ill help you out :))