#also this is the last old ask ayyyyy

[fear-less]

₊˚⊹˚ 𐙚 what letter? sirius, what letter?

pairing: james potter x f!reader

➥ In which, you never planned on talking to james ever again, not after your last encounter with him. Luckily Sirius saves the day.

an: omg last chapter, and its my fav.... hopefully this convinces some of y'all to watch anne with an e....I LOVE awae. ALSO!! i’m going to start writing all requests in my inbox, send some! i’m gonna start with the oldest then the more recent ones! also, im not ignoring your request if it takes a while😭 i’ll be writing then get stuck on what to do then move onto the next thing… bad habit but😭

Warnings: angst, fluff, this inspired by awae (aka the best show ever), another letter James wrote gets lost ayyyyy, literally that's all…

series masterlist ! - divider creds: i-mmaculatus & dollywons

It was now June, the end of your final year at Hogwarts. The castle, which had been your home for the past seven years, seemed to hum with the bittersweet energy of goodbyes. If you had told your eleven-year-old self that you’d be leaving these halls without James, she would’ve been heartbroken—devastated, even.

Back then, you’d believed in the stories. You’d believed that the boy who made your heart race would be the one you’d leave Hogwarts with, hand in hand, ready to take on the world together. But life had a way of unraveling those childish dreams, weaving something far more complicated in their place.

James hadn’t spoken to you since that night—since you’d spilled your heart out and he’d told you to marry Finn. It wasn’t anger or malice that kept you apart, but a quiet, mutual understanding that too much had been said, and yet not enough to bring you back to where you were before.

You told yourself it was better this way.

Finn was everything a girl could hope for: kind, considerate, and endlessly patient. He never pressured you for answers when your mind drifted during a conversation, never asked why you’d go quiet whenever someone mentioned James. You were grateful for that. But as the end of term feast approached, with the prospect of leaving Hogwarts forever hanging over you, you couldn’t help but feel the weight of everything left unsaid.

James sat at the Gryffindor table, surrounded by his friends, but the usual Marauder energy was dampened. He’d won the Quidditch Cup, aced his N.E.W.T.s, and had offers from the most prestigious Quidditch teams waiting for him. By all accounts, he should’ve been ecstatic. But as he watched you sitting across the Great Hall, laughing softly at something Finn said, James felt hollow.

He’d told himself he was doing the right thing. That night in the common room, when you’d asked him if there was a chance for the two of you, he’d convinced himself that pushing you toward Finn was what you deserved. Stability. A future he couldn’t promise.

But watching you now, he couldn’t shake the feeling that he’d made a mistake.

“Mate,” Sirius said quietly, nudging James with his elbow, “you’re staring again.”

James tore his gaze away, his jaw tightening. “I wasn’t staring,” he muttered, though his friends knew better.

“You’ve got one night left,” Sirius continued, his tone uncharacteristically serious. “If you’re going to do something about this, now’s your chance.”

James shook his head, laughing bitterly. “What am I supposed to do? Walk up to her, tell her I’m an idiot, and beg her to take me back? She’s with Finn now, Pads. She’s happy.”

“Is she?” Remus asked quietly, his eyes flicking to you. “Because from where I’m sitting, she looks like someone who’s convincing herself she’s happy.”

James didn’t respond for a while, this was his last chance of seeing her–he couldn’t lose her. 

“You're right. I’m going to see her tonight. I’ll tell her that I missed what she was trying to tell me!” James said, now in a bit of a better mood. 

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Once night fell, James made his way to your dormitory. He prayed no one but you would be there. Out of your four roommates, he only knew two, and he’d seen them sitting in the common room without you. That meant you had to be in your dorm, right?

The corridors were quiet but not empty. Most of the dormitory doors were open, with people wandering in and out. It didn’t take long for him to find your door—how could he forget it when he’d been inside so many times before?

James stepped in cautiously, but his heart sank when he realized the room was empty. You weren’t there. He sighed, running a hand through his messy hair. This was supposed to be it—the last time he’d ever get a chance to talk to you—and you weren’t even here.

His eyes wandered to your side of the room. It was unusually tidy, and most of your belongings were already packed away. The only things left were a few scattered pieces of parchment, a quill, an inkpot, and an envelope on the desk.

Before he even realized what he was doing, James sat down at your desk. His hand hovered over the parchment for a moment before he began to write, his thoughts spilling out faster than he could process them.

“Dear… (Y/N),” he murmured to himself as the words took shape. “I’m sorry... I was confused before. I’m not anymore. I love you. –James.

P.S. May I please... have Buddy back?”

James smiled faintly as he reread the last part. Buddy was the stuffed animal you’d gifted him on his birthday before you’d snatched it back after losing a bet. If things didn’t work out, at least he’d have something to remind him of what you two once had. Maybe he’d even pass it on to his future child—if he had one.

He quickly folded the note, wrote your name on it and placed it neatly on your desk. 

 ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ

You’d spent almost the entire day with Finn, and at first, everything seemed fine. But, as always, the cracks begin to show, and yet another argument erupted.

“Do you not trust me?” you asked, your voice sharper than you intended, though the bitterness behind it was impossible to hide.

“No, I don’t. No man would if they were in my place!” Finn shot back, his tone defensive, the edge in his words cutting deeper than he realized.

You scoffed, the sting of his accusation hitting harder than you wanted to admit. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means you need to stay away from James,” he said, his voice rising. “Someone told me they saw you two talking alone in a corridor. I know you used to be good friends, but you haven’t spoken in months. You’ve never told me why, so I can only assume the worst!”

“We stopped talking for a reason I don’t even understand myself!” you fired back, your frustration bubbling over, your voice shaking with the weight of the truth.

Finn’s expression darkened, his lips curling into a bitter frown. “Yeah, sure. I totally believe you. He definitely didn’t distance himself because he fancies you. He looks at you the way I do.”

His words were a gut punch, the weight of his jealousy and mistrust pressing down on you. For a moment, you stood frozen, your heart pounding in your chest. Then, taking a deep, steadying breath, you decided you were done dancing around the truth.

“He doesn’t fancy me,” you said, your voice trembling, though you forced yourself to meet his gaze. “And I know that for a fact. Since you want honesty, fine. I dragged James out of that party. I told him…” You hesitated, but the words came spilling out before you could stop them. “I told him how much I love him. That I’d leave you if he wanted me to. And do you know what he said?”

Finn’s jaw tightened, but he said nothing, so you pressed on, tears now streaming freely down your face.

“He told me you’re a great guy. That I deserve you. He didn’t even tell me he loved me back.”

The silence that followed was deafening. Finn stood there, his expression unreadable, his jaw set like stone. You couldn’t tell if he was angry, hurt, or simply done. After what felt like an eternity, he turned on his heel and walked out without a word, leaving you alone in his empty dormitory.

You stood there for a moment, stunned, as the weight of what had just happened settled over you. Was this the end of whatever fragile future you’d tried to build with Finn? You didn’t know. All you knew was that the room felt stifling, the air too thick to breathe.

Wiping the tears from your cheeks, you pulled yourself together enough to leave. Sitting here, drowning in your own thoughts, wasn’t going to help. You needed air, a distraction—anything to stop the whirlwind in your mind.

The cool night air greeted you as you made your way to the Black Lake. The walk was long, but with every step, your nerves began to settle. The gentle lapping of the water and the soft rustle of leaves in the breeze worked to quiet the storm in your head, if only for a little while.

As you stood by the Black Lake, the moonlight dancing across the rippling water, you wrapped your arms around yourself, trying to keep your emotions from unraveling. Finn's words echoed in your mind, but instead of providing any sense of resolution, they left you with a heavier burden of confusion and regret.

You had laid everything bare—your feelings for James, your failed attempt to move on with Finn—and now, for the first time in ages, you felt unmoored. The certainty you’d desperately tried to force, the future you envisioned with Finn, had shattered. All that remained were questions, unanswered and painful.

You closed your eyes, letting the cool breeze wash over you, as though trying to cleanse the ache that lingered in your chest. Your heart still aches for James, despite everything. But what was the point in holding onto hope? He had made his feelings—or lack thereof—clear. And now Finn, the only thread that had tied you to some semblance of stability, was slipping away too.

After what felt like an eternity of sitting there in solitude, you made your way back to Hogwarts. When you reached your dorm, you didn’t bother tidying the mess on your desk. The next person who would stay there would find scattered pieces of parchment, half-used ink, and a neglected quill—unless the house-elves came to clean and dispose of it all.

You opened your luggage, only to realize you’d packed everything, leaving no clothes behind for the night or morning. That’s when your eyes landed on the small stuffed bear. A wave of emotions washed over you at the sight of it. You wiped away the tears you hadn't even realized had been falling. Sniffling, you stood up and made your way to the washroom to shower, hoping the warm water would wash away at least some of the weight on your heart.

Once you were out of the shower, the thoughts continued to swirl in your mind. After a long pause, you decided to write to James. You didn’t think you could face him—not after he rejected you, not when your emotions were still raw and all over the place.

Dear James, Since we are parting ways, perhaps forever, I feel I must unburden my heart. You are the fond object of my affection and my desire.  You, and you alone, are the keeper of the key to my heart.  Please don’t be alarmed--I don’t expect your favor--but I can’t, in good conscience, not reveal myself.  I’m not engaged--nor will I be--unless, it’s to you, James.  It always has been and always will be you.

With love, (Y/N)

PS: Here’s Buddy, in case you want him. I don’t think I can keep him without crying whenever I see him.

As you finished the letter, you sat there, staring at the words that held every ounce of your vulnerability. Your hands trembled as you carefully folded the parchment and slid it into an envelope. For a moment, you hesitated. Doubts surged in your mind—was this the right thing to do? What if he never read it? What if this only made everything worse?

But deep down, you knew it was the only way to find closure. You couldn’t carry these feelings any longer, locked away inside. This letter wasn’t just for him—it was for you too, a way to finally release the emotions that had weighed you down for so long.

You reached for Buddy, the small stuffed bear that had once brought you so much comfort. Seeing him now only reopened old wounds, but at the same time, he reminded you of the love you had for James—the love you still had, even though it wasn’t returned. You hugged Buddy tightly one last time, letting a few tears fall before tucking him into the package with the letter.

You had considered waiting until morning to deliver it, but the thought of sleeping on it felt impossible. You needed to let go of this weight before you could rest. So, once all your roommates were asleep, you slipped out of the dorm and made your way to James' room. The dorm was empty, just as you'd expected. Whenever there was a holiday, the boys would often roam the grounds late into the night, returning well after curfew.

You placed the package—Buddy and the letter—gently on James' bed. You glanced around the room, the usually cluttered space now oddly quiet and foreign. Standing in it alone, you couldn’t shake the feeling of how much had changed. With a final, shaky breath, you turned and left, the door clicking softly behind you as you disappeared into the darkness.

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It was nearing three-thirty in the morning when the boys finally returned. Sirius stumbled in, clearly drunk beyond belief, while Remus went straight to the shower, and Peter collapsed into his bed, too tired to think. James, however, stood frozen in his doorway.

His eyes were locked on a small brown-covered package resting on his bed. Confusion washed over him as he approached. He quickly tore it open, finding a folded piece of parchment with his name written in your handwriting—and Buddy.

His chest tightened with anger. "Oh, really, (Y/N)? You couldn’t even face me? World class!" His voice was laced with frustration as his eyes flicked from the bear to the letter. All he could focus on was how you'd read his letter and now returned Buddy.

You actually gave Buddy back? He remembered you promising, no—vowing—never to part with it, no matter what. Yes, he'd asked for it, but this… this was more than just a simple request.

Without thinking, James ripped the letter apart. His fists clenched around the torn pieces as he made his way into the empty common room. In a fit of rage, he threw the scraps into the fire.

As the flames flickered, a sudden thought struck him, and his stomach dropped. “What if... oh, shit!” he muttered, cursing himself. What if you had come to speak to him, only to find he wasn’t in the dorm, and in desperation, wrote that letter? What if it was your way of telling him that you felt the same, that you regretted everything, and that you still cared?

But now, it was too late. The letter was gone, burned to ash.

James stood frozen, clutching the remaining pieces of the letter in his hands, the ink smudging as he frantically pieced together the broken words:

Parting ways... Don't... Heart... Finn... Engaged... Don't love... Alarmed... Not... Alone... Forever...

What was all of this? Engaged to Finn? You just met him, for Merlin’s sake! And why would you tell him that in the letter? Did you want to make him feel worse, to confirm that you had truly moved on?

The sound of a door creaking open snapped him out of his thoughts. He turned to see Remus stepping into the room, his expression one of quiet surprise. With Sirius and Peter asleep, James saw no reason to keep this to himself any longer. Remus was always the one who could make sense of things, the one who could calm him down when nothing else could.

“Remus, don’t go back to sleep, please," James blurted, pacing in frustration. "I’ve got breaking news! That night at the party? Forget it. Turns out (Y/N) doesn’t love me after all. She wrote me a letter explaining it—and told me she’s engaged to Finn!”

Remus paused, looking at him with wide eyes. “You told yourself—and us—that you would get over her. If she’s really engaged to Finn, then... let’s start now.”

James shook his head, his voice thick with emotion. “I can’t, Remus.”

“You can, and you will,” Remus said firmly, his tone softer but still resolute. “Once you’re over her, you’ll be able to move on. It’ll be a new chapter, James—one without her in it.”

James’s face twisted in pain. “I want to be happy, Remus. I just can’t. (Y/N) is marrying the man of her dreams, and that man isn’t me.”

Remus sighed, stepping closer to his friend. He knew James too well, and knew how deep this went. “Let’s go to bed,” Remus said gently. “We’ve got an early morning ahead of us. Maybe you’ll have a chance to speak to her tomorrow? Tell her—and the others,” he added, gesturing toward Peter and Sirius, “maybe they’ll have a better plan for you.”

ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ

You were on the train now, staring out the window as the platform slowly filled with students saying their last goodbyes. You were ready to go home—or at least as ready as you could be. Ready to return to your parents, who still thought you were with Finn. The truth of your relationship, however, was far murkier. You and Finn hadn’t officially broken things off, but the silence that followed your last argument felt louder than any words could. It was obvious, even if neither of you had said it out loud.

The weight of everything sat heavily on your shoulders as you watched the scene outside. Friends hugged tightly, some with tears streaming down their faces, while others exchanged laughs and promises to write over the summer. There was a bittersweetness to it all—a kind of closure, even in the goodbyes. But you didn’t feel that closure. Instead, you felt like you were caught in a loop of unresolved emotions and unanswered questions.

You’d managed to find an empty compartment. It wasn’t hard when you were one of the first to board while everyone else lingered, reluctant to leave the castle behind. The quiet was what you needed—time to think, to breathe, to let the ache in your chest settle.

Diana, who's your best friend and practically your sister from how close you two are and your friends had offered to sit with you, but you told them you wanted to be alone. They understood, of course. They always did. You’d confided in them about what had happened with Finn, and while they’d tried to offer their support, you knew this was something you needed to process on your own. They couldn’t fix what was broken—not with Finn, and not with James.

The hum of the train as it prepared for departure filled the air, a low, steady rhythm that somehow felt comforting. You leaned your head against the cool glass of the window, watching as more students climbed aboard . You envied the lightness in some of the students—their laughter, their certainty about who they were and where they stood with the people in their lives.

For you, everything felt like it was in limbo. The argument with Finn had left you reeling, unsure of what came next. And then there was James—the boy who had once been your closest friend, who still lingered in your thoughts even after months of strained silence.

You sighed, closing your eyes for a moment as the train gave a soft lurch, signaling the start of its journey. Home felt both too far away and far too close.

The train began to pick up speed, the platform slowly fading into the distance as the familiar rolling hills of the countryside came into view. You opened your eyes, letting out a breath you hadn’t realized you were holding. The quiet of the compartment wrapped around you like a fragile cocoon, but your thoughts refused to settle.

James. His name echoed in your mind like a song you couldn’t quite forget. You hadn’t seen him at the station, though you’d looked for him instinctively. The habit was hard to break, no matter how strained things had become between the two of you.

You thought back to that day in Finn’s dorm, where everything had shifted. The weight of your confession to Finn, the raw honesty, and the pain that followed. But it wasn’t Finn’s face you pictured now—it was James’s. His messy hair, his lopsided grin, the way his hazel eyes lit up when he laughed. And the way those same eyes had avoided yours for months, the distance between you growing wider with each passing day.

You shook your head, as if the motion could clear your mind. It didn’t. Instead, it only made the ache in your chest deepen. The truth was, you missed him. More than you cared to admit, even to yourself.

It wasn’t just the friendship you missed, though that alone had been a loss. It was the way he’d always been there, the way he could make you laugh even on your worst days, the way he’d look at you like you were the most important person in the world. Somewhere along the way, things had changed, and you weren’t sure if you could ever get back to where you’d been.

The train rattled along the tracks, the countryside blurring past the window. You wrapped your arms around yourself, as if you could ward off the coldness that had settled deep in your chest. For a fleeting moment, you wished James were here, sitting across from you like he used to. You could almost hear his voice, teasing you about something silly, his laughter filling the space between you. But the compartment was empty, and the silence felt heavier because of it.

You leaned your forehead against the glass, the cool surface grounding you. Maybe this summer would give you the space you needed to figure things out. Maybe time apart would help you understand what you really wanted, and what you were willing to fight for. But as the train carried you further away from Hogwarts, you couldn’t shake the feeling that the answers you were looking for weren’t waiting for you at home—they were somewhere back there, tangled up in the boy you couldn’t stop thinking about.

You closed your eyes again, letting the rhythmic motion of the train lull you into a state of uneasy calm. The journey home had only just begun, but you already felt like you were carrying the weight of an entire year’s worth of emotions with you. And no matter how far the train took you, there was one thing you couldn’t seem to leave behind: the hope that somehow, someday, you and James could find your way back to each other.

A knock startled you awake. For a fleeting moment, you hoped it might be James, but when you opened the door, it was Diana. Despite your insistence on wanting no company, you never minded hers. You mustered a small smile as she entered.

“So,” Diana began, sitting across from you, “you wrote him a letter saying you still love him?”

“Yes,” you replied softly, avoiding her gaze.

“And he hasn’t talked to you?”

“Mhm.”

“And you called it off with Finn?”

“Well...” You cleared your throat awkwardly. “I still need to, but he despises me now. Once I get home, I’ll owl him. He’s... not exactly happy right now.”

“Because of the fight?” Diana’s tone grew sharper. “I know you lied to us. It wasn’t about your parents, was it? If you want to tell me the real reason, just say it.”

You hesitated, your throat tightening. “I... I ruined it with him. He got mad about James, and I snapped. I told him what I told James at the party. He didn’t even say anything; he just stood there, then left. We haven’t spoken since. I haven’t even told my parents yet—I don’t know if he’s told them.”

“Wow...” Diana’s expression was a mix of disbelief and frustration. “And James hasn’t said anything? You went through all that struggle, and he’s just blatantly ignoring you?”

“I know! But maybe I shouldn’t have told him how I felt again. Remember what happened at the party?”

Diana softened, reaching out to touch your hand. “I’m so sorry, (Y/N). I can’t imagine being in your situation.”

“It doesn’t even matter anymore,” you mumbled, though the lump in your throat betrayed your words.

“Of course it matters!” Diana said firmly. “Finn demanded the truth and then got mad when you gave it to him? That’s not fair!”

“Well, at least I won’t be engaged to him anymore.”

“When did he pro—” Diana started, but her words were cut off as Sirius suddenly barged into the compartment.

None of you had noticed him outside, and you had no idea how long he’d been listening.

“How much did you hear?” Diana demanded, her eyes narrowing.

“Enough to know that (Y/N) is no longer with that Finn bloke,” Sirius replied with a grin that was far too smug for the situation.

“Well, if you’d listened more, you’d also know—” Diana began again, but Sirius interrupted her too.

“(Y/N), have you even tried to speak to James about this?!”

“Had I had the opportunity, I would have,” you shot back, your frustration bubbling to the surface. “In fact, I went over—”

“You’ve had every opportunity!” Sirius exclaimed, cutting you off again. You stared at him, then at Diana, who looked just as shocked as you felt.

“Admit it,” Sirius said, his voice rising. “You’ve been smitten with James since the moment you two met! The clues have been everywhere! And don’t deny that you were completely beguiled by him at the party—even though you were dating some random bloke you barely knew!”

“That’s not—” you started, but Sirius plowed on, his words tumbling out in a rush.

“Then you drag James out of the party, demand to know how he feels about you, and give him all of thirty seconds to decide your entire future!”

“Well, that’s because—”

“And worst of all,” Sirius thundered, ignoring you, “you callously ignored the letter James wrote to you, where he told you he loved you!”

If confusion were a person, it would have been you at that moment. You exchanged a bewildered look with Diana.

“What letter?” you asked, your voice barely above a whisper.

Even Sirius looked thrown off. “What do you mean, ‘What letter?’”

“Sirius,” you said more firmly, standing now. “What letter?”

“The letter was the whole reason he stopped talking to you!” Sirius snapped. “He put one in your luggage—slipped it into a pocket—and then left another on your desk yesterday!”

You blinked, your mind racing. “Which pocket? I don’t use most of them, and I left everything on my desk at Hogwarts—it was just extra parchment. Why didn’t he just tell me?”

“How am I supposed to know?” Sirius said with a shrug. “But what are you waiting for? Go find James! He’s crying like a bloody baby—that’s the only reason I came to find you. Took me five minutes to track you down!”

You nodded quickly and scrambled to your feet, your heart pounding like a drum. You knew exactly where James would be. After sharing the same train compartment for seven years, you could find it blindfolded, even in your sleep.

Without hesitation, you hurried down the train, determination and nerves tangling in your chest like vines. Your footsteps echoed faintly against the narrow corridor, your mind racing ahead.

Then you froze.

James’ laugh drifted through the crack in the door—warm, familiar, and effortless. It was the kind of laugh that made the world tilt, like gravity had shifted just enough to pull you toward him. The sound wrapped around you, igniting a fire in your chest and a tremor in your hands.

You pressed a shaky palm against the cool surface of the compartment door, drawing in a deep breath.

This is it.

With a steadying exhale, you slid the door open. The soft creak barely registered over the hammering in your ears.

“James,” you began, your voice trembling but determined. “Can we… could we talk? Please. If that’s okay with you?”

James froze mid-laugh, his body stilling like a snapshot in time. His gaze locked onto yours, wide-eyed and searching, as if trying to confirm you were real. Slowly, he nodded, his brow creasing in quiet confusion, curiosity flickering behind his eyes.

You stepped inside and let the door click softly shut behind you, the faint sound reverberating in the small, enclosed space. Here, at the back of the train, there were no prying eyes, no curious ears—just the two of you and the fragile weight of the moment.

For a heartbeat, neither of you spoke. The air between you felt electric, thick with unspoken words and barely restrained emotion. James watched you carefully, his gaze tracing your face as if committing every detail to memory.

Your chest tightened, the words caught like a stone in your throat. You’d waited too long, carried this too far. But you couldn’t falter now.

Swallowing the lump of fear, you took a step closer, and then another, until the space between you vanished completely.

You weren’t sure who moved first—if it was him, or you, or maybe both of you at once—but the distance dissolved like it had never been there at all. His hands found your waist as yours slid up to cup his face, and then his lips were on yours. The world outside the compartment disappeared in a rush, the hum of the train fading into nothingness.

It wasn’t frantic or hurried. It was soft, almost tentative at first, like neither of you could quite believe this was real. But then, the kiss deepened, and with it came a flood of emotions—relief, longing, and something you didn’t dare name just yet.

When you finally pulled back, both of you were breathless. James’ cheeks were flushed, and his glasses were slightly askew. His lips curved into the smallest, shyest smile you’d ever seen from him. It was a look you wanted to commit to memory.

But the weight of why you were here—the reason you’d sought him out—pressed against your chest, demanding to be spoken to.

You took a deep breath, looking James in the eye as you began. “Sirius told me about the letters. The one in my luggage, the one on my desk… I didn’t even know they existed. I never read them.”

James blinked, his expression shifting from confusion to disbelief. “You… you never read them?” he repeated, his voice breaking slightly.

You shook your head, your chest tightening as you stepped closer to him. “No. I only found out about them because Sirius barged into my compartment and told me everything. He said you hid one in my luggage, and the other was on my desk, buried under a pile of parchment I never cleaned up. James, I had no idea.”

James ran a hand through his hair, his face clouding with frustration and regret. “Merlin,” he muttered, mostly to himself. “All this time, I thought you knew. I thought you read them and just… ignored me.”

“Why would I ignore you?” you asked, your voice trembling. “James, I didn’t know because I didn’t even think to look. And the letter in my bag—I didn’t even realize there was a hidden pocket until Sirius told me.”

James stared at you, his lips parting as though he wanted to say something but couldn’t find the words. Finally, he managed, “I wrote them because I didn’t know how else to tell you how I felt. I thought if I put it on paper, it’d be easier to say everything I couldn’t say to your face.”

“James, I didn’t read them, but you need to know something,” you said, your voice steady despite the whirlwind of emotions inside you. “I wrote to you too. I wrote you a letter and left it on your bed with Buddy.”

His expression shifted, his brows knitting together in a mix of guilt and realization. “The letter with Buddy,” he repeated, his voice barely above a whisper. “I… I tore it up.”

The weight of his words hung in the air, and your heart sank. “You… tore it up?” you asked softly, your voice breaking.

James nodded, his hands balling into fists at his sides. “I was angry,” he admitted, his tone thick with regret. “I thought you’d moved on, that you didn’t care anymore. I saw Buddy, and I just… I lost it. And when I saw you’d written me a letter instead of talking to me in person—well, I just… I thought you were giving him back to me because you didn’t need him anymore. I thought you were telling me that you were done with me, that you’d let go. So, I tore it up without even reading it.”

You stared at him, your heart heavy with the weight of the misunderstanding. “James, I wasn’t telling you that I was done. I… I was just too scared to face you. After what happened at the party… when you told me to marry Finn… I didn’t think I could bear hearing you reject me again. I didn’t think I could face you after that.”

James' face softened, his brows furrowing with understanding. “I never meant for you to feel that way. I thought I was doing the right thing, telling you to marry Finn, but it wasn’t because I didn’t care. I was trying to push you away, trying to convince myself that it was better if you were happy with him. I couldn’t bear to see you hurting, but instead, I just made it worse.”

You shook your head, your voice catching. “I didn’t think you wanted me, James. You told me to marry Finn, and you didn’t even give me a chance to tell you how I felt. I thought if I wrote the letter, maybe that was my chance to say what I couldn’t say face-to-face.”

James’ breath hitched, and he stepped toward you. “I was wrong. I should have listened to you, should have seen that I was the one hurting you. I was so confused. I didn’t want to lose you, but I didn’t know how to tell you that I felt the same.”

“James, that letter wasn’t about moving on. It was about you. I told you everything—how I felt, how I couldn’t be with Finn because my heart wasn’t his to have. It was yours. It’s always been yours.”

James’ breath caught in his throat as realization washed over him. “You… you said that?”

You nodded, tears brimming in your eyes. “I told you that I loved you. That I’ve always loved you, no matter how much I tried to deny it. And I gave you Buddy because I didn’t think I deserved to keep him anymore.”

James’ face crumpled, and he took a shaky step toward you. “I’m so sorry,” he whispered, his voice thick with emotion. “For tearing up your letter, for hiding behind mine, for not saying what I needed to say.”

You shook your head, tears spilling down your cheeks. “We both made mistakes, James. But I’m here now. And I’m telling you everything because I don’t want to waste another second pretending I don’t care.”

James reached for you, his hands cupping your face as he leaned in. “I love you,” he said, his voice raw and unguarded. “I’ve loved you for so long, and I’ve been such an idiot for not saying it sooner.”

You let out a shaky laugh, relief washing over you like a tide. “Well, you’re saying it now. That’s all that matters.”

He kissed you then, the world falling away as the weight of years of miscommunication and doubt finally lifted. His lips were warm and familiar, and when he pulled back, both of you were breathless and flushed.

“We’re terrible at this,” James said with a small, rueful laugh, his hands still resting on your cheeks.

“We really are,” you agreed, smiling through your tears. “But we’ve got time to figure it out.”

James grinned, his eyes shining with hope. “Together?”

“Together,” you confirmed, your voice steady and sure.

James kissed you again, slow and tender, as if he was savoring the moment. The warmth of his lips, the familiarity of his touch—it was everything you had wanted, everything you had longed for but been too afraid to claim.

When he pulled back, his forehead rested against yours, breath shaky, both of you flushed from the rush of emotions. For a long moment, neither of you spoke, the weight of everything that had been left unsaid finally settling between you in a peaceful, unspoken understanding.

“I don’t know how we got here,” James said softly, his voice hushed, as though he was still trying to piece everything together in his mind. “We both made so many mistakes, (Y/N). I hurt you, and I never meant to. I’ve been a coward, hiding behind my letters, my words... not telling you the truth when it mattered.”

You shook your head, gently cupping his face in your hands. “James, we both let fear dictate everything. We were both too scared to face the truth. But we're here now, right? That’s all that matters. We don’t have to figure it all out right this moment. We just have to start somewhere.”

James looked into your eyes, his gaze intense, as if he was memorizing every detail, afraid that if he blinked, the moment might slip away. “I love you, (Y/N),” he said again, this time with complete certainty. “I’ve always loved you.”

Tears welled in your eyes, and you laughed softly, letting out a breath you didn’t realize you were holding. “I love you too, James. I always have. I was just too afraid to believe it.”

James smiled, a real, unguarded smile, the kind that made his entire face light up. “So... do we get to be happy now?” he asked, his voice filled with hope.

You nodded, the warmth of his hands still holding your face. “Yes,” you whispered. “We get to be happy. Together.”

For a long time, neither of you moved, just stood there in the quiet, the weight of everything finally lifting, as if all the confusion and misunderstandings had just melted away.

James let out a soft laugh, breaking the stillness. “I’m not perfect, (Y/N),” he said, his thumb gently brushing the tear on your cheek. “But if you’ll have me, I’m willing to try.”

You smiled through your tears, your heart full to bursting. “I think we both need to try, James. And we will. Together.”

He kissed you one last time, and this time, it wasn’t hurried or filled with desperation. It was a kiss that held all the promises of a new beginning. The kind of kiss that said, we’ve found our way back to each other.

And when you pulled away, you both stood there, smiling through the tangled mess of emotions that had, somehow, become beautiful in their own way.

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[somedayonbroadway]

Heyyyyy!!!! That last chapter of Everything I've Ever Wanted was solid gold! I loved it! I had an idea for another part to it! (feel free to completely disregard it) But what would happen if Race brought Spot home one day? I've been thinking about that a lot. It could be pretty angsty, but ayyyyy thats kinda what we do here! Thank ye! Have a great night/day!

Everything I Ever Wanted Masterlist

Actually this turned out a little fluffier than I expected.

Also, sorry for the 3 year wait. I’m motivated to write more finally.

Please enjoy!

Race tugged at Spot’s hand. He pulled him beneath the tree at the side of their house. He was riddled with anxiety. Spot leaned in to kiss him and it occurred once again to the young teenager that this boy was two years older than him, a football player and, something much more concerning, he was a he. And Spot pressed him against the tree, kissing him.

Race melted beneath his touch. Fourteen years old was too old for a first kiss. At least, that’s what everyone at school said. Not his friends. Race didn’t really have any friends. Everyone at school called him weird. They all told him he was a nerd and he was too young to be in their class and that he’d never get anywhere.

Not Spot though. Spot was the first person to hit someone who tried to hit him first. He was the first person to defend him. The first person to call him pretty, to ask him if he’d ever wanted someone to kiss him or teach him about sex or tell him that he deserves to have fun.

When Spot pulled away Race’s instincts just took over. He started trying to take Spot’s shirt off. They managed to toss it to the side as Spot reached for the button of Race’s pants. As far as Race’s papa knew, he was out at a late night study session with a bunch of college students. He was never allowed to go to social gatherings. He was never allowed to experience new things that his papa didn’t approve of.

Having a hot football player fiddling with his zipper was enough to make Race just about go wild.

That is, until Spot was quite literally shoved off of him and a young man stood between them. “Get the hell off of you, you little pervert! Get out of here! Go!”

Race’s blue eyes widened in panic. “Jack!”

“You fix yourself right then hell now, kid!” Jack hissed. Race was already trying, his cheeks flushed with embarrassment.

Spot put his hands up. “Sorry! I’ll go! Racer, I’ll see you tomorrow!” he yelled, rushing away in fear at Jack.

Jack turned back to his boy. “You better get your ass up to your bed and pray that Mr. Snyder is dead asleep right now and never finds out what you were doing!” he growled. “Go!”

“No, Jack! I was having a good night! I want this! I was finally gonna be normal—!” Race whined.

Jack grabbed the child’s wrist. “Shut your mouth right now,” he hissed. “March yourself into that house and think about how dangerous this was! I had no idea where you really were! You said you were at the library and when Snyder sent me to pick you up, you weren’t there! I was worried sick!”

The words made Race look down. “I’m… I’m really sorry,” he muttered. “I just… I felt like I needed to just have a normal night… I mean… What did you do when you were my age? Did you go to parties? Or football games? Were you popular, you look like you were popular…”

Jack sighed. “You don’t wanna know about my life when I was your age. Now get upstairs and don’t even mention that boy around Mr. Snyder… seriously…”

“Jack, all I do is study! All I do is take pointless tests and learn languages I’ll never have any use for! I don’t have any friends, I don’t get to go out for ice cream dates or learn how to smoke drugs or take alcohol—“

It was very hard for Jack to stifle his small chuckle but he managed to only smile a little instead. “Okay, baby boy, come on, let’s go inside,” he whispered, taking the kid’s hand.

Race grumbled. “Don’t laugh at me,” he insisted. Jack quietly took the boy inside and took him to the kitchen, picking the lock of Snyder’s liquor cabinet. “What are you doing?”

The young man glanced down at Race. “You said you wanted to be a teenager, so I’m gonna let you be a teenager,” he said, taking down a bottle of tequila. He poured a small shot into a cup. “Here,” he whispered before putting everything back just like he’d found it. The boy stared down at the drink in his hand. He glanced up at Jack before smelling the liquid. Jack smiled. “Bottoms up, kid.”

So that’s what Race did. That is, before he started coughing and making a face at the foul drink he’d just downed. “That’s disgusting,” he heaved, trying not to throw up.

Jack nodded. “Yeah. Now go brush your teeth and go to bed and promise me you’ll never have sex.”

Tears formed in the boy’s eyes. He barreled himself in Jack’s arms. He hugged him tightly and sniffled a bit. “I’m sorry I worried you… you’re the only friend I got…”

And then just like that, Race rushed upstairs like a good little boy, doing everything Jack asked.

Jack sighed and leaned back against the counter, a warm and wobbly feeling in his chest.

[lightninginhersoul]

15 questions, 15 mutuals

Thanks for the tag @janewaysratherirregularstarlog

1. Are you named after anyone?

Not my first name! My middle name is my maternal grandmother's name which is awesome because she's an absolute badass

2. When was the last time you cried?

Um the last time i absolutely sobbed? Two days ago. Cried at all? Last night

3. Do you have kids?

Not yet, ask me again in 5-10 years

4. What sports do you play/have played?

I was a three sport athlete pretty much from the age of 6 to 18 but it changed a lot. The last set was field hockey, swimming, and softball (hell yeah! i miss my teams!). I also ran cross country, played terrible basketball, soccer, and archery. Now I mostly just hike and swim but I'm thinking about volunteering as a referee for the younger leagues on weekends so I don't have to be stressed about calls.

5. Do you use sarcasm?

Who, me? Never

6. What's the first thing you notice about people?

Likely the outfit, the costumer in me will not go away ever. After that, probably face and height

7. What’s your eye color?

Blue!

8. Scary movies or happy endings?

Happy endings plz !

9. Any talents?

Maybe that I have a million hobbies and find it really easy to pick up textile arts? That I taught myself how to spin my field hockey stick and am really good at air dribbling? Otherwise I'm sure all my friends could tell you my talents but I sure can't

10. Where were you born?

The you ess of ayyyyy (North east US)

11. What are your hobbies?

Oh boy let's go! Star Wars, cosplay, hiking, writing, reading, drawing, painting, video games, embroidery, bobbin lace, sewing, mending (visibly and invisibly), knitting, crochet (relearning rn), calligraphy, wood carving, lathe work, woodworking in general/carpentry, wood burning, d&d, scrapbooking, tarot, baking, and probably a few more I'm forgetting. (yes I have adhd how could you tell?)

12. Do you have any pets?

Not at the moment but as soon as I live somewhere with space I'm gonna get a kitten (2)

13. How tall are you?

5'8"

14. Favorite subject in school?

This is not a fair question because at my graduation they mentioned that my favorite class was all 8 that I was taking...I'd pick what I went to college for but I got two majors and two minors in different things too? I guess I'll say English in a pinch but this is super hard

15. Dream job?

Getting to be a college professor for the humanities that I have degrees in (rather difficult given the market but that's a dream for next decade maybe after I stop my current job which is also cool I love engineering but like hmm to create art) or becoming a vampire and having my job be Student as I get degrees in basically every subject ever

Gonna tag some of my mutuals now and absolutely no pressure! Know that I think you're awesome and really cool!

@old-bird @chesapeakewoman @the-egginator @dioxizinegreeen @toofewtrueblue @acetheasshat @squagel @chickalupe @raevenlywrites @marisolinspades @explodingfurby @sir-jeffers11 @raineydaywrites @slightly-strange-girl @shouldnt-you-be-doing-work

(also if any other mutuals wanna do this please feel free!)

[annimator]

BRO, FUCK SPENCER (/j he’s still a great character, and I still like him)

(I HAVE THINGS TO SAY ABOUT THIS MOTHERFUCKING EPISODE)

• Yeah ngl, didn’t really gaf about the recap lmao

• INTRO TIME WOOOOOO

• Oh damn, Nat’s plotting something with the guys

• “Am I one of her besties? Aw! That’s gives me the more fuzzies!” LOGAN ILY

• already said this before in my Ep 6 post, but I LOVE Logan & Richard’s bond sm

• I JUST FUCKING REALIZIED LOGAN SEARCHED THE FORTUNE TELLER THINGY WHERE HE FIRST TALKED TO ALESSIO. YOU CAN’T BE FUCKING SERIOUS

• “Jesus christ, I’m old.” Lmao yea

• YOU IDIOTS, ANA WAS STALKING YOU TWO. DON’T JUST- oop she got the treasure thingy. Good on her for using a hairclip(?) as a lock pick >:3

• An extra vote advantage? Fucking dope!

• Awwww she calls her Ana :D

• OH MY GOD WE GOT YURI TENSION LEZGOOOOO

• Ngl, it’s smart of Ana to not put whatever she & Marissa has going on first, and save the advantage for herself.

• Oop, Isabel clocked Nat. I can smell the besties’ tension from a mile away

• “Also, the whole gender war thing our team has been doing has been really regressive” FUCKING REAL

• “Natalia.” “Yes?” “I’m not mad” YOOOOOO

• OH SHIT, THEY’RE SCHEMING TOGETHER NOW

• Thanks for cleaning the laundry, Lynda, ig

• “Those are dry clean only” not to switch media, but that line instantly reminded me of quackity yelling “YOU FUCKING DRY-CLEANED IT” when he saw Pac bring out Fit’s robe. It’s been a day since the 1 year anniversary of that moment, what did ya expect

• MY FAVESSSSSSSS and also Spencer

• BENJI & HANNAH COMPLIMENTING TRISTAN FOR LAST EPISODE, I ONLY FUCKING WINNN

• OH BOY, IVY ANGST. SHE WANTS TO PROVE HERSELF AFTER WHAT HAPPENED LAST EPISODE

• She’s boutta crash out

• yayyyyyy Jade & Spencer are back in an alliance

• can you hear my sarcasm

• I CAN STILL SEE JADE DOUBLE-CROSSING SPENCER FROM A MILE AWAY AND I LOVE IT

• “Is it gay or straight to date a non-binary person” Dude I ask myself the same question. AND I’M NONBINARY

• “It ain’t that simple man, I mean, it’s a pretty big spectrum! There’s more than just 2 labels to choose from!” DAMN RIGHT! >:D

• “But um, why the question?” AND THEN FUCKNIG SPENCER INTERRUPTS

• “Does Spencer think we’re dumb enough to believe him? Good thing Benji & I aren’t buying it!” AND THEN IT FUCKING CUTS TO BENJI BELIEVING HIM IM CRYING

• TREVEK KEEPS FUCKING STARTING AT EACH OTHER THIS EPISODE. AGAIN /pos

• Also I’m still waiting for a double greeting where those two kiss btw. KAI & MAGGY GOT THEIR DOUBLE GREETING AND THEY KISSED. WHAT ABOUT TREVEK- (I AM DRAGGED OF THE STAGE)

• Damn this ferris wheel dodgeball game looks fun!

• Why do I have a feeling Ivy’s jinxing herself

• ofc Benji giggles at a balls joke

• Aw, Zaid’s joining her for support :D

• I know damn well Trevor & Derek are having fun w/ throwing the dodgeballs towards the contestants

• “Richard! Here!” “Thanks son!” I LOVE THEIR BOND SO MUCH OMGGGGG

• GIRL STOP MAKING EXCUSES FOR YOURSELF

• Zaid, I’m gonna be honest, you’re fucked

• Ofc, Zaid targets Nat. Did y’all forget episode 2? Natalia got his ass

• YOOOOOO HANNAH FIGHTING MARISSA FOR THE BALL

• “No one told me you’re allowed to dodge!” DO YOU KNOW WHAT THE FUCKING GAME IS CALLED????

• ZAID RLLY GOT HIS SHIT WRECKED CAUSE HE GOT DISTRACTED OVER A GIRL AGAIN

• Oh boy, Richard’s boutta hard carry blue team again. WOOOOOOOOOO

• OH BOY MORE RED TEAM DRAMA

• AYYYYY MY FAVE TRISTAN CALMING THEM DOWN

• YOOOOO IDC QUARTET IN THE FERRIS WHEEL

• GET FUCKED LYNDA

• Oh damn, this is NOT Ivy’s episode

• “Haha! Your team’s falling apart!” Lynda you’re right, but AT THE SAME TIME-

• Ayyyy Richard tossing to Logan

• TRISTANNAH CRUMBS! TRISTAN TOSSED A BALL TO HER

• SHE CLOCKED LOGAN WITH THE BALL THEY GAVE HER WOOOOOOO

• Oh shit, Marissa boutta take one for the team?

• YOOOOO TRISTAN HELPED RED TEAM WIN THE POINT LETS GO

• YEAH CELEBRATE THAT W TRISTAN U DESERVED IT

• Welp, now that we got Connor’s VA suggesting that the viewers should sub to ONC. I just wanna talk a bit about TomJake season 2

• I… AM REALLY FUCKING EXCITED FOR IT WOOOOOOOO

• Like yeah, people wanted spinoff’s for other characters (myself included, I’d love to see a gabellie and/or jaiden spinoff) but I can see why Jared & Robert decided to make another season for them; Tom & Jake are undoubtedly DC’s most popular characters with how many posts & greetings about them go viral. So hopefully, all the money & views that go towards their spinoff will make way for other spinoffs for other characters in the future! :D

• also JAYCE SAID THAT IF THEY GET JAMES’ VA FOR THE SPINOFF, THERE WOULD BE A JAIDEN & TOMJAKE DOUBLE DATE EPISODE. I WANT TO SEE THAT HAPPEN PLZ-

• aight back to the episode

• Richard’s hard carrying as always- OH SHIT ANA WHAT WAS THAT

• OH MY GOD WE GOT MORE ANARISSA TENSION LEZGO

• STOP ZAID IMMEDIATELY WENT TO HER SIDE

• oh shit, they paused the challenge for her dislocated shoulder

• “That is a shoulder, yeah.” “I KNOW THAT’S A SHOULDER! HOW DO WE PUT IT BACK IN!” IM CRYING, I LOVE THEIR BANTER

• AYYYYY HANNAH CLUTCH

• “My mom taught me when I was young.” OUGH

• DAMN IS BENJI GONNA THROW UP? VOMIT ON SPENCER IT’D BE FUNNY

• IVY, YOU LITERALLY DISLOCATED YOUR SHOULDER ALBEIT TEMPORARILY. YOU CAN SIT OUT STAHP PROVING YOURSELF

• OMG TRISTAN CLUTCH. THAT’S MY GUY

• THUMBNAIL SHOT. TRISTAN AVOIDED ALL THE DODGEBALLS IM SO PROUD OF THEM

• “What is this sorcery?” Dude, they have a roof-thingy on their head

• OH MY GOD THEY LOOK SO HAPPY WHILST WRECKING BLUE TEAM’S SHIT I’M SO HAPPY FOR THEM

• THEY TOOK OUT MARISSA AND LYNDA FUCK YEAH

• WAIT OH MY GOD THEY’RE MAKING A CALLBACK TO EPISODE 2. TRISTAN WAS TERRIFIED ABOUT FACING RICHARD. LOOK AT THEM NOW. THAT IS ONE OF MY THREE FUCKING FAVOURITES ABOUT TO TAKE ONE FOR THEIR TEAM

• I CANNOT STATE THIS ENOUGH. TRISTAN IS NOT ONLY A GREAT CHARACTER PERSONALITY WISE. BUT AS SOMEONE THAT IS ALSO NON-BINARY, I LOVE TO SEE THIS KIND OF REPRESENTATION WHERE SOMEONE ISN’T SOLELY CHARACTERIZED FOR THEIR LGBT IDENTITY

• I’m not even sad that they lost lmao. There’s nothing wrong with seeing Richard hard carry for blue team

• AWW, THEY HAD A SMALL CONVO AFTERWARDS

• “2 for 2. I’m gonna get ya next time though. Promise!” “You almost had me!” That would be so full circle for their character fr

• OH BOY WE GOT ZAIVY AND ANARISSA DRAMA. FUCKING WICKED

• “Red team, I’ll see ya toniiiiight, where someone will be the loser!” Trevor, your theatre kid is showing

• YEAAAAA MORE TRISTAN GLAZING

• OOOOOOOH THE RED TEAM’S FIGHTTTING

• Tristan’s right bro, lay off my guy

• NAW, WE GOT VIBE TRIBE ANGST TOO?

• Ohhhhhh, Ivy comes from a perfectionist household, and that’s what makes her want to prove herself, aight I get it

• Also Ivy tearing up over her never being enough for herself & her parents got me fucked up ;-;

• “I…I understand plenty. At least the uh… pleasing your parents part.” WAIT NO DON’T DO THIS ME. I’M NOT READY FOR TRISTAN ANGST TOO

• “I could never compete with the bottle. Dad he… still calls me a girl and um… he gets really aggressive if I say otherwise. And mom she… still drinks every night just to forget I exist. That’s the uh… that’s the gist of it, anyway!” NO MY SHAYLAAAAA (damn it feels weird saying that for the first time)

• TRISTAN IS LITERALLY GOD’S STRONGEST SHOULDER. WDYM THEY’RE SO UPBEAT, KIND, & OPTIMISTIC DESPITE HAVING GONE THROUGH ABSOLUTE FAMILIAL SHIT

• wait are characters that stay kind despite everything my type. I also like Sanji, and I’m not gonna spoil his backstory since it happens like 800+ episodes into One Piece but like-

• I keep forgetting Tristan’s 18 lmao, I’m only younger than them by a little bit!

• “Man dude, we’re all just like, a bunch of overgrown primates stumbling around trying to find meaning in this simulation called life!” “Why didn’t you tell me this earlier?” “I was afraid. I mean… I was afraid of giving my family more power over me, but um, a wise friend taught me that sometimes it’s better to sit in shit.” THEY QUOTED HANNAH. THEY QUOTE HANNAH OH MY GOD

• STOP IVY SEES THEM LIKE A YOUNGER SIBLING SHE NEVER HAD FUCK MY LIFEEEEE

• “Ivy, Ivy! Look at me Ivy! Shut the fuck up man!” WHY DID THAT MAKE ME LAUGH

• YOOOOO BENJI CLUTCH, SHE GOT JADE TO APOLOGIZE TO HANNAH OVER WHAT HAPPENED WITH AMELIE! THAT’S MY GUY

• Oh shit, Spencer’s having too much fun being a little shit

• FUCK MAN, I AM SCARED FOR THIS ELIMINATION

• NO FUCKING WAY

• SPENCER USED JADE’S TOTEM?

• EVERYONE VOTED FOR HIS BITCHASS LMAO

• wait, who did Spencer vote

• Oh my god, they’re both shocked about who got the boot who is-

• no

• NO

•NONONONONONONONONONONO WHAT THE FUCK

• SPENCER YOU BITCHASS MOTHERFUCKER, HOW DARE YOU VOTE THEM OUT. WHAT THE FUCK MAN

• I JUST FUCKING REALIZIED SPENCER ACTED LIKE A DICK ALL EPISODE SO THAT EVERYONE WOULD VOTE FOR HIM. YOU SMOOTH MOTHERFUCKER, THAT WAS ACTUALLY A GREAT POWER PLAY

• STOP, ZAID, IVY, BENJI, & HANNAH ARE ALL SAD ABOUT THEM GETTING ELIMINATED. THEY’RE JUST LIKE ME FR

• “Ivy, that’s not very vibe tribe of you! Come on! You got this, I believe in you!” “Take care for her.” “Promise.” BEST DC TRIO RIGHT HERE ARGUE WITH THE FUCKIG WALL

• “See you later Tris!” THEY FIST-BUMPED I AM NOT OKAY, MY OTPPPPPPP

• BENJI WAS BAWLING. I FELT THAT BRO

• “Benjiiiiii! Aw, it’s okay come here! I’m gonna miss you so much man. You always know how to make me laugh! Please keep that smile on your face! Okay man!” “I’m gonna miss you too!” I FELT THIS SO HARDDDDDD

• “When I came on this show, I was just expecting to make some friends! I wasn’t expecting to… find a family. So… Ivy & Zaid, I’m rooting for you guys! You guys got this dork in your corner!” I LOVE THEM SO MUCH

• ALSO HANNAH & BENJI ARE HONORARY VIBE TRIBE MEMBERS. TRY PRYING THIS HEADCANON FROM MY DEAD CORPSE YOU FUCKERS

• THEY’RE ALL WAVING GOODBYE TO THEM. THIS SHIT GOT ME FUCKED UP

• ONLY OTHER CONTESTANT BESIDES ALESSIO TO LEAVE WITH A SMILE. THAT’S MY GOAT RIGHT THERE

• “Ultimately, Tristan’s the biggest threat who had no quarrels due to their influence. Spencer may of had his moment, but I hid all ties of our partnership due to voting for him. So, all the blood will be on his hands! This is my win really.” GET HIS ASS JADE. DO IT FOR TRISTAN

• WAIT I JUST FUCKING REALIZED SOMETHING. DID TRISTAN JINX THEMSELVES WHEN THEY SAID THEY’D GET RICHARD NEXT TIME??? OR AM I LOOKING INTO THINGS TOO MUCH

• EITHER WAY, GREAT EPISODE DESPITE THAT ELIMINATION. IF JADE ISN’T THE SOURCE OF SPENCER’S DOWNFALL, I’LL BE VERY DISSAPOINTED

• Alrighty new Elimination ranking from “damn, alright” to “I WANT TO SHOOT SOMEBODY”

4th - Amelie

3rd - Ted

2nd - Alessio & Diego (Yeah looking back. It might be a tie lmao)

1st - Tristan (NO SHIT DUDE. DID YOU READ THE ENTIRE POST-)

• god, I love & hate that british motherfucker so much

[miyosoart]

Ayyyyy, another collab with @xfr3eax

Yes our third collab drawing these two cause these two are Master-not-so-Masterminds haha. Watch them destroy places for petty reasons hahah xD. It all comes from that conversation we have about wrap- okay no I WON’T CONTINUE THAT OKAY HAHA XD. But hey if you got that shush. Ideas could come from many ways xD.

Also, Free asked that I posted this since her wifi commit whack on her xD Anyway, enjoy the evil-not-so-evil fancy boomers old men AHAHA XD

Crystaltale, sketch, and last effects by @zahrart17 Magusverse, lineart, and coloring by @xfr3eax

[bigger-simp-than-kazuichi]

Skater kid!Todoroki x reader

Hey guys this is the beginning of my bnha skater au! I hope you guys enjoy!

(FYI this is also my 1st ff so pls don’t come at me ;-;)

(tw: swearing)

You never thought you would ever ride a skateboard in your entire life, that is, until your boyfriend Todoroki offered to teach you how to skate. He was pretty experienced, at least in your perspective, but he never thought of it as a big deal. You didn’t even think he even told anyone about his talent. These were your inner thoughts while you dressed up for your skate park date. You were dressed in a blue hoodie, adidas joggers and a pair of old skool vans.

As you were scrolling through Instagram, Todoroki sent you the text that he was in front of your house. Shit, you thought, as you rushed down the stairs and put on your shoes. Once you opened the front door, there was Todoroki in a black hoodie, black jeans with a chain on it, and a pair of busted up black slip on vans. He was also holding his skateboard. As you walked towards him, he gave you his little grin that you so loved. “Ready to go baby?” He asked.

“Yeah,” you replied, wrapping your arms around his neck, pulling him into a hug. He quickly relaxed into the hug and wrapped his arms around your waist. After you both pulled away from the hug, Todoroki set down his board and held out his hand for you to grab onto when you stand on it. “Todoroki, I will literally fall if I step on this.”

“And this is why we are going on this date, love. I’m teaching you how to ride.”

“Yeah yeahhh.”

You then placed your left foot onto his board, right near the center of the board. Then Todoroki, while still holding your hand, guided your foot, to the point your foot was covering the screws at the front. You then clenched his hand harder as you lifted your other foot and placed it on top of the screws on the other side of the board. Your boyfriend then looked at your stance as you struggled to stand on the skateboard alone. “You need to find your center of balance. Try leaning forward a bit.” And that’s exactly what you did, and to your surprise, it was working.

“Heh, you see this Todoroki kun? I’m doing it! I’m standing!”

“Yeah, with my help.”

“S-shut up icy hot idiot.”

“I-icy hot?”

You let out a chuckle at his slightly clueless nature. He then grabbed your hand harder and he proceeded to pull you while you were still on his board. That’s when you started to lose balance. “Just hold on to me, and I’ll pull you all the way to the park. To turn right you lean forward, and for left you lean backwards, but not too much.” You nodded and that’s exactly what he did. You continued to hold his hand and listened to his advice, moving towards the right when there was dog poop on the ground and moving to the left when the two of you had to move for an elderly couple going out for a stroll.

When you arrived at the skate park, you hopped off the skateboard and let go of your boyfriend’s hand. Todoroki seemed relieved that there wasn’t anyone around, so he got on, pushed off with his right leg, and rolled down the cement bowl like a pro would. You watched in awe as he did all those tricks flawlessly. He then stopped and ushered you to come down towards him. Once you reached him, Todoroki held out his hand again, and helped you mount his board. “I’ll teach you how to push off. You don’t have to push off a lot, but just enough so that you go somewhere.” You took your right foot off the board and placed it on the floor.

That’s when you heard yelling and laughing from the other side of the park and when you looked to see where they were coming from, you saw some familiar faces. Way too familiar. And they noticed you as well.

“Ayyyyy y/n! Todoroki!” Kirishima yelled as the hopped on his own skateboard and skated over to you. Behind him, Mina, Sero, and Denki followed.

“Yo!” You responded, then you looked at Todoroki. He didn’t show any emotion like usual however, your eyes focused on that bead of sweat that formed ever since he saw the all too familiar Bakusquad. It seemed like your previous thought of him not telling anyone he skated was actually true.

“Y/n!” Sero called, “is Todoroki teaching you how to skate?”

Todoroki let out a sigh, signaling me to just tell the squad the truth. “Yeah, he’s teaching me how to skate.”

Mina’s eyes lit up from the statement, “OH MY GOD THATS SO COOL! Todoroki! I didn’t know you skated!”

“I don’t think he told anyone about this.” Kirishima stated. “If he did, then we would’ve invited him. Ehh, he must’ve had a reason why he’s been hiding his talent. Yo Todoroki, wanna show us what you’ve got?”

Todoroki looked at you, probably wanting some reassurance, but all you did was give him a smile and a thumbs up. He sighed, looking back at the spikey redhead. “Yeah, sure.”

“ALRIGHT! WE ARE THE FIRST ONES TO SEE TODOROKI SKATE!” Denki exclaimed.

“Actually, I think y/n was the first one to see him skat-”

“SHUT UP SERO! THEY ARE DATING!”

“Alright, Denki, I was just saying,” Sero shrugged.

As you laughed at their argument, a familiar figure zoomed past you and the bakusquad. It was Todoroki, rolling back and forth on the steep half pipe. Now everyone was watching in awe while he did a sweeper, and many other tricks that you weren’t familiar with.

“YEAHHH TODOROKIII!”

After doing some more tricks he left the half pipe and skated over to you and the squad.

“TODOROKI YOU’RE SO GOOD WHAT??”

“DUDE YOU BETTER TEACH ME HOW TO DO THAT SPIN!”

“I-I can barely do an ollie...”

You patted Mina as she started to fake cry and gave your tired boyfriend a kiss on the cheek. Todoroki blushed at your gesture and ushered you once more to his skateboard and this time, you didn’t take his hand and instead you tried to push off on your own. Surprisingly, you were able to balance, at least, for about five seconds, until you fell onto the hard cement.

“Y/n!” Todoroki called as he rushed over to your fallen state. You grunted at the slight pain you felt on the arm and foot you used to support your fall. The half white half red haired boy checked the leg you fell and sighed in relief, seeing that you weren’t in too much pain and didn’t find any serious injuries, only a bruise on your knee. He used his quirk to make an ice pack for your bruise and hoisted you up on his back, giving you a piggy back ride.

“GAH Todoroki! I’m fine! You can put me down!”

“Ok, if you say so.”

He lightly placed you down but once you put support on your injured foot you winced, which unfortunately Todoroki saw.

“See, come on, we’re going back to your place.”

“Awww...”

“We can stop by the store and buy some ice cream.”

“Deal.”

You hopped on his back and while he supported you with his right arm, he grabbed his skateboard with his left.

“Aww, you guys leaving now?” Denki complained.

“Dipshit, y/n is hurt!”

“I KNOW THAT SERO!”

You and your boyfriend laughed at the two of them arguing and waved goodbye to the others.

Even though it was a short way back home, you felt bad that Todoroki had to carry you all the way back, but what could you do? He doesn’t seem like it, but when it comes to the people he loves, Todoroki Shouto becomes really stubborn, and to be honest, you found that really cute.

Once you reached your place, you gave Todoroki your key and he placed you down so that he could unlock the door, but he also made sure you were only getting support from your uninjured foot. After he successfully unlocked the door, he carried you again and laid you on the couch and left to get spoons for the ice cream. He gave you a spoon and watched as you immediately opened the ice cream and devoured it like it was your last meal. Of course, you saved some ice cream for him, because why wouldn’t you? After you two finished the ice cream, you rested your head on Todoroki’s shoulder.

“Heh, even though I’m technically crippled now, I had a fun time, thank you Shouto.”

After hearing those words, your boyfriend kissed the back of your hand, and then your forehead.

“Of course baby.”

[girlofthefandom]

Tales from the smp thoughts and random quotes I enjoy (essentially delayed live blogging) Part 1

I love all these npcs already

“Hurry up camera man!”

Yes! Gladiators! I remember seeing someone say that idea

Just some joes

Porkeous the 7th. Oh no I can see the fan girls now.

Yes! Punch em off!!

“Yeah same.”

“That’s good cause I don’t” “we build a new colosseum every time”

I can’t want to see the names of everyone’s characters. Especially Philz’

Stairs everyone’s worst enemy

Tubbo... sweet child

She disappeared!! Witch craft! Burn the witch!

Tubbo=Jacky (forced off streets)

Fundy=Laggius Maximus (I love this name so much with the spinning)

Please don’t kill both the boys in this fight. But also I’m cheating for Laggius.

Subbin Empire? Subbin to Technoblade!

Go Laggius! This is not going to go well... this is really not going to go well...

No I refuse to root for Jacky. I like Laggius the bit will be funnier later.

I want to know what happened to the last camera guy! Let us know!

Vertical feeling! Heaven forbid! Also look at them insulting TikTok

I love the background music. Feels magical.

A lovely jump

Surprises... well that’s ominous. And wait the first one!

Tower! Towers are always good.

We got our popcorn. Ready to watch this fight.

Laggius is... coming... maybe...

GG Jacky... he hasn’t won yet but gg.

Lava!!!! Hooray! Love us some good lava

Poor Laggius... he was burning too early

And Laggius is still lagging

Why isn’t Jacky burning?? He won???

Knocked unconscious in the lava. What is this a Pokémon game?

GG Jacky.

Nobody needs to know the way around here.

“Almost like a video game” just break that fourth wall right down

Keeps looking at sapnaps character and talking about strong. How sweet. We love some fiancé’s.

Please don’t throw Laggius to the wolves

Jack Manifold = Bartholomew

Phil having to translate. I love it.

Watson = Phil

Good pun. Very good pun.

Nobody likes Punz. Gosh everyone’s so mean

We love Watson. Let’s go Watson.

Bartholomew with the drugs and Watson.

Crazy drunk man with fire resistance

I agree with Watson why did we come to this cousin.

Sapnap in a hole

Also I love the drinking age being 3

Let’s go Watson!!!

Where are my Pom poms? I’ve got a Watson to cheer for.

Execute those architects.

And their first Borns.

Watson! Watson! Watson!

“Welcome to the land of the living Bartholomew.”

I love the slow fight.

Come on Watson shoot em!

Oh no. Oh no. Come on Watson. You’re so close!

Noooooooooo.

Why Bartholomew???? I can’t spell that! I’ve been relying on autocorrect this whole time.

Watson would be so much easier to spell.

Still must go down the stairs.

Speed running life. That’s what I do.

No one dies. Just take them to nurse joy.

Poor Punz being so bullied

Punz=Levi

Levi? Really? Oh well I like the name. He won’t like but I like the name.

Also why does Levi have such a full backstory.

Has weapon hands with a horrible southern accent. I love it.

“Hmmm”

Who is Ol’ Sap?

Sapnap = John

And no creativity apparently.

Laggius had the best name for a gladiator. All the others are too boring.

Why are we beating up BBH

Hannah=Genevieve

Genevieve! I can spell that thanks to old Barbie movies!!

Go Genevieve! Trained her life! I love this woman!

Mostly women upstairs. I love it our fandom is so biased.

“Are you sure about that?”

Darlin? Really that’s not the right word.

Go Genevieve! I probably shouldn’t cheer for her since everyone I’ve cheered for has lost.

But still GO GENEVIEVE!!

Our empire is millions in dept

Let’s step up the battle! Let’s gooooo

“Ayyyyy!!!”

Go Genevieve! Levi hush up with your gills.

Jump in! Splish Splash!

Wait why are we listening to Mario Kart music? Wait I recognize this song.

Go Genevieve!!

YES FINALLY! I PICKED THE WINNER!

Levi hush. You done lost messed up southern boi.

Go Genevieve! I can actually spell your name!

I straight forgot Porkeous the 7ths name for a second and had to check my notes.

Stairs. Woop de doo.

“Pick the most handsome” wow

Ol’ Sap = John as I remember. And he’s sticking with it. Bold man sticking with it.

Ranboo = Ran

Just Ran and it’s just the enderman part of the skin. Haha. Very funny.

BBH = Edward

He went from strange voice to normal(ish) voice

I don’t like Edwards speech pattern. At the very least. Yucky.

John v. Edward letsa go

Go John!

Wait we renaming? This is going to get confusing.

Handsome. Can you two quit flirting (not really keeping going)

Alrighty then Ugly v. Edward

Go Ugly! (Sentence I never expected to type)

The seat thing

And saying king Julien. Sigh.

Just BRB real quick.

Thinking about buying things. Oh he meant ad.

Alright Ad 1/3 let’s go.

No I can’t even open chat to watch them instead of the ad. Boooo.

2/3 let’s get this done!

3/3

Snickers just loading for forever

Alrighty we survived.

And a crown really? Just wants his normal skin back.

Let’s go Ugly!

Bo-at battle! Let’s go!

Please don’t shoot Ugly.

Go Ugly!

“King Are you ok!”

I still hate Edwards speech pattern so much

Please. Just pretend to have a fair fight.

The rabbits???? Cant rabbits swim?

Hooray rabbits! I don’t what purpose they serve but I love them.

Edward or Edwardo? Did I miss something?

Ok it seems both.

Shooting a rabbit? Disowner on you disowner on your cow.

Killing pets reference? The references are so good.

YES UGLY!!!! Thank heavens!

I’m 2/4 for choosing the winner.

I hope ugly keeps on winning

“Colosseum Remote Control”

3 in 1 battle how did they not plan correctly for an even number

Nerds hold cameras you heard it here folks

I don’t want to hear deeper for some of these stories. All I want to see is Genevieves further story. She seems deep.

“Massive pigs growling at us. No offense”

Watson trying to clean the table.

We bringing in the Harmonika.

Harmonika fits the moment.

Yes name him handsome! Haha

Grievous is how I’m spelling that stupid sounding name. But it’s better than John and ugly.

I can’t get over the name Ran.

BE GONE LEVI!

I love Watson having to take care of Bartholomew. Translating for him and waking him up.

Phil just can’t resist playing the dad.

No no stopping just fighting.

Also I love Watson saying break it up. I wish Watson had won.

Genevieve sounds like such a lovely lady and she deserves to win.

As much as I love Grevious I want Genevieve to win.

Sapnap=Grevious good gracious this is hard to follow.

Ran is cool. I’m going to kill over listening to them just saying Ran.

Complicated backstory. Found the main character.

Ran is cool.

Wait this place is going down??? Pardon me???

Three person fight is...

Grevious v. Ran v. Bartholomew

Genevieve v. Jacky

Puns! Let’s go! And of course Levi likes Puns.

Everyone is so mean.

GO GENEVIEVE!

And Watson just babysitting Bartholomew

I’m going to get good at spelling Bartholomew. Because I was horrible at it before.

Empire of women!

Cages=Lava

“Mmm what smells good”

Battle star!!

“Boing Boing Boing”

Water dome?

Water Dome in Lava?

Well he tried zombies/bunnies

Lava in the water sphere?

Only fight at top of fishbowl got it.

GO GENEVIEVE!

Come on girl you’ve got this!

No Genevieve babe please don’t lose.

“The boats going down.” “It’s yelling timber.” “Like that song that hasn’t been made yet.”

Hurry up and die. I love it.

NO GENEVIEVE!!!!!

Do do do do

That was a longer fight. But pretty good.

To the cellars! Not to the cellars!

No! The boat is gone!

That was close.

This feels like a funky Pokémon game.

Jacky is a finalist! Good for him. I’m not cheering for him but good for him.

TRIANGLE FORMATION

Who’s missing? Oh wait it’s Bartholomew

“Intense prison cosmetic surgery”

Rabbits! We love rabbits.

Oh no faceplant mode!

What is even happening?!?!

Thinking creatively.

Just don’t die. What a game.

Cant wait to watch the thinking creatively animatic.

In a boat to avoid floating.

Attack!

Go Ran!

Oh we’re lagging.

Disable the dive mode!

The zombies are a bit much. Oh everyone’s actually fighting.

Rats why weren’t there baby zombies when Watson was going. They even made a Phil reference.

No treaties.

Go Ran! Keep on running away.

I love Ran.

GO RAN! I love Grevious. But GO RAN

Faster Zombies. Zombies go zoom.

Oh Grevious won.

Wait why does Ran have grass and why do they see him again.

Placing more dirt to clean old dirt.

Poor Grevious.

I feel sorry for him now.

Stand on da dirt.

Put the rabbits in the cages!!!!

I cheer for Grevious.

And yes there are many a loser.

Everything is so spicy. As in lava is there.

You can’t kick your fiancé’s future descendent out of the gang.

A full inventory

Watson with the backup button!

Seriously all he can do is be a dad.

OH BOY LAGGIOUS IS BACK!

And he’s here for the picture.

And Watson is (still) bullying him!

Bartholomew is pure trouble.

Ooops. The root beer was on the brain.

Watson! Come get your drunk!

Oh wait he actually did! I love this so much.

Petition for more Phil in Tales.

Only Genevieve voting for Jacky

Some people refusing to vote.

I’m sorry who asked if Laggius is ok.

He is always (not) ok

He is fine. See.

I love Laggius’ character the most.

Go winners!

Reformed kinda. If that doesn’t sum up the whole of the smp.

All the grass in the cage.

And Laggius being his slow self.

Nothing v. General

I love how it went from King to Emperor to King

And there is Laggius.

I don’t know how anyone else is spelling Laggius but I like this way and refuse to edit it if it actually spelled different.

Oh we’re getting more ads.

1/3 let’s go

[arce-elliot]

Magnus Archives - First Impressions (151-175)

We’re almost there, gang. Out of the Lonely and into the Eyepocalypse we go! Blah blah I had 75% of the series spoiled and am jotting down my thoughts, you know the drill.

EP 151 (Big Picture): - OH SIMON??? - okay okay Simon's kinda funny, you go you funky little sky grandpa - Martin Tell Her The TRUTH EP 152 (A Gravedigger's Envy): - oooh another ancient one - hey that's terrifying wtf - can someone please comfort jonny boy good lord EP 153 (Love Bombing): - Idk why the cult ones freak me out, maybe because cults are real? - oh god what's gonna happen to that dog - I literally just made my dinner with white wine vinegar that's a little old are you sHITTING ME - GIRL GET OUT OF THERE WHILE YOU HAVE A CHANCE YOU KNOW SOMETHING'S OFF - AYYY THE HUNTIN' GANG - tbh it was weird that they helped him even though they knew he wasn't human actually - DAISY!!!!! - Jon can you chill w/ the sass if you're not gonna help - Okay I'm gay but Daisy Growl Hot - Two dying monsters trying to reconcile their humanity, this is sad I hate it here EP 154 (Bloody Mary): - oh god it's This Episode I've been dreading it poor Eric - g o d Gertrude sounds so upset - I would die for Eric - "Eric I'm gonna count to ten and you're gonna tELL ME HOW YOU QUIT" - I'm already crying good god - "he needed me" o w - MARTIN GOT TO SAY FUCK!!!!! - O U C H - i am so upset FUCK this podcast - the catalogue of the dead is just the Delano-Keay family album EP 155 (Cost of Living): - CALL HER OUT JON - Tova, to this doctor's heart: it's free real estate - A FUCKING C H I L D?????? - ah yes, some more DIY surgery, who needs doctors when you have knives? EP 156 (Reflection): - ayyyy adelard how are ya - oh fun flesh time - oh? extinction? - also that was gross what the fuck - M A R T I N EP 157 (Rotten Core): - go save Martin before I cry - ADELARD!!! - ah no, I'm gonna miss this dude he was kinda cool - this hits different in corona times - okay this is actually pretty gross wtf - Martin's lonely because he chose to be, Jon is lonely because everyone hates him, poetic cinema EP 158 (Panopticon): - Ah Shit Here We Fucking Go - OH WHAT THE FUCK NOT!SASHA???? - AYYYYY THERE'S JONAH MAGNUS WELCOME HOME RAT BASTARD - uh oh bye bye Gertrude Time - mom and dad are fighting to be Martin's favorite parent lmao - no not the promise :C - Martin is the brain cell, he really just played both these men like kazoos - gdi Peter give me my boy back EP 159 (The Last): - hi I am Sad - Marto blease just go with the tired eyeball man - "i see you" MY B O Y S EP 160 (The Eye Opens) - oh lord here we go - at least we get some Jonmartin conversation - Monologue Time! - Jon: can I just say, from the bottom of my heart...my bad EP 161 (Dwelling): - welcome to the apocalypse bitches - FINALLY i've been waiting for these tapes for my entire life - TIMMMMMM! SASHAAAAA! - Elias being a normal person is unsettling - ALL THE EYE JOKES gdi I refuse to simp for eyeball man - THE JARRING "ARCHIVIST" I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD - "If I wish for all of you to go away do you think it'll work?" well it worked on Tim and Sasha - Elias: I'm a cool boss, I can drink wine - the image of Jon just huddled on the couch with a bag of tapes and listening to them over and over is so sad - sorry Gertrude no Sasha, just a sad little man - thank u for the powerpoint Gertrude - JON DON'T SNAP - i love them so much your honor EP 162 (Cosy Cabin): - GERRY GERRY GERRY - okay Gertrude and Gerry are adorable I love goth boy and his badass grandma - Gerry, ever the pragmatist: but what about TAXES gertrude - Tim and Sasha interacting is the sweetest thing ;_; - oh this is AFTER the hookup lmao - OH WAIT Sasha canonically knew about Danny??? I didn't know that oof - Oh Jon's getting a phone call I suppose - Jon's trying so hard to be dramatic and Martin's like "okay bitch grab ur backpack and lets go" EP 163 (In The Trenches): - "Tell everybooooody I'm ooon my waaay, new frieeends and new plaaaaces to seeeee" - YESSS LET MARTIN CURSE OVER THE GUNSHOTS AND BAGPIPES - "Martin can you stand over there and cover your ears while I cast Eldritch Ramble" EP 164 (The Sick Village): - another one that hits different in corona times - I hate the word soupy - what in the midsommar - if you can't find your own statements, DIY your own - Martin: fuck u Jon, Helen's my friend now - Martin: can I get an Uber, can I PLEASE get an Uber EP 165 (Revolutions): - this is my friend's favorite episode so I'm excited - oh circus music gross - THE RHYMINGGGGG OH I LOVE THIS - my arms are sore from happy stimming at this audio oh my god - SHUT UP JON IT WAS A GOOD POEM - GET HER ASS JON - is that our first "Ceaseless Watcher"?? I think it was! - Jon: Level Up! - Martin: that's hot EP 166 (The Worms): - HELL YES JON SAID FUCK - oh worm? - Martin answer your damn phone - awww Martin don't doubt yourself :C EP 167 (Curiousity): - Fiona: lmao watch this -passes out- - oh I didn't realize Eric was one of the OGs, their conversations make more sense now - Michael :c - Gertrude you got played like a fiddle damn EP 168 (Roots): - jealous Martin lmao - Jon just tell him why you woke up that would probably solve this - As someone who also freaks out about every little twinge this episode felt targeted EP 169 (Fire Escape): - desolation time? desolation time. can't wait to walk through hell - so aside from Smirke's 14 we have the 3 additional fears: the Extinction, the Scotland, and the Landlord - oh this one is terrifiyng i love it - OOOOH the "jons" slowly fading in was really clever - G O D martin sounds so defeated poor boy EP 170 (Recollection): - Martin finding tape recorders is the cutest thing - Oh fuck are we in the Lonely oh shit - this is so disconcerting i love it - someone get this man a better chair EP 171 (The Gardener): - Martin: damn that's a lot of bones - oh not THIS dude again I can barely understand him oh my GOD - well that was interesting EP 172 (Strung Out): - oh web? - oh this is sad shit - I think this is one of the worst domains yet for me personally this sounds like hell - g o d the web makes my brain hurt blease Jonny I'm stupid EP 173 (Night Night): - oh dark? - oh so the darkness is just the apocalypse daycare? nice - oh and this tween runs it, nice - Jon: are you SURE you want me to kill this middle schooler? - wow this is depressing EP 174 (The Great Beast): - oh hunt? - oh vast? lmao that's what i get for assumptions - Martin just wants to kill a man is that too much to ask someone give him a gun EP 175 (Epoch): - ex...tinct...ion? - “Peter was right” no FUCK YOU I refuse to give Peter any credit LOOK ADELARD WAS RIGHT, Adelard Decker laid the BLUEPRINT - poor Jon he's gettin these hard-hitting google searches - Basira and Daisy?????? OH WAIT THAT MEANS OH NO

[moonraccoon-exe]

Hi, Connie. I know it's been a while since you did any headcanons and idk if you still do them, but I'm curious of your opinion. I realize the wall is one giant quarantine bubble, but the people are still free to do as the please inside it. How do you think each of the chocobros would handle an Insomnia-wide quarantine like what's going on in most of the world right now? What if one of them got sick (assuming a FFXV equivalent of COVID-19?) How would Regis, as King, take care of his people?

PS: Aparently the Keep Reading line is having some troubles. May appear right under the question (how did it get THERE?) or nowhere at all lol pls forgive tumblr he trying. 

HEEEEEEEEEELLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It’s definitely been a while since I did any headcanons, but that’s because school has kept me busy like crazy, and when I have spare time, I put it into my two big fanfics going on (I don’t want people to wait too much!) but I’ll definitely keep doing these, every single one of them, until I finish, even if it takes me years and years <3

The ask prompts are one of my favorite things in the world so of course I’ll keep them going!

HOH

YOUR PROMPT IS SUPER INTERESTING!!!!! AYYYYY, let’s see what this raccoonie brain has there!! 

FFXV Insomnia in a quarantine

First things first, the government

Regis, as King:

Regis is going all the way into making sure EVERYONE can stay home.

Regis is going to ask the other countries to lend Lucis money. As in. M I L L I O N S.

“Your Majesty, you ARE aware we’re nowhere half to repaying that debt in a near future?”

“THIS IS A LITERAL PLAGUE WITH NO CURE YET THAT’S KILLING DOZENS SOME OF WHICH THEIR FAMILIES CAN’T SAY GOODBYE TO AND YOU W O R RY  A B O UT   T HE  E  C O NO M Y   ¿¿¿? ?!??”

Regis has brain and, most importantly, humanity. He’s definitely going to put the country in debt for the next 15 kings is that helps people right now.

Mostly because he’s aware it’s no one’s fault. 

Regis is announcing what he’s going to do to keep people safe publicly:

The next three months of any loans are forgiven. Mortgage, rent, water, electricity, and all the public services will be free for the next three months. If you own any debts, be it a house or a little clock, you don’t have to pay on the next 3 months, and instead that amount will be divided into future months in small amounts so it’s recovered in the medium or long run. No one needs to spend one gil in any of the basics, don’t worry about that, it’s covered, government’s got you, SO PLEASE STAY HOME. 

Regis is aware that some people can’t stay home because what little they earn is what they spend in basic food; Regis is going to spend lots of the money he burrowed in them.

Regis is going to pay as well to teachers and artists for online classes and entertainment, because he’s aware of the mental/emotional distress people can be in after certain time indoors. 

Regis is going to put most the money in the medical and cleaning services.

Regis is going to keep online and phone polls for people to fill in particular cases (I still need to go out because I need to go look after my mother each friday, I still need to go out because I need to go get medicines each certain time at this district) so the Citadel’s intel know best what to do.

Regis is going to make sure to have teams sanitizing public transport and places everyday.

Regis is a no-game man, dammit.

((Regis is the reason Insomnia only needed three months before being free))

Makes sure the media broadcasts not only the death cases, but also and most importantly the healed cases. Not gonna let the media get stupid with this for money or paranoia, no sir

Noctis, as prince

DID YOU THINK HE WAS JUST GOING TO MOP, THIS IS THE PRINCE

(Remember the game tells us he was a damn good prince as in politically? what a bean <3)

Noct was taken more off guard; Regis acted immediately like a (good) madman, Noctis still needed a bit to process it

Noct is who comes up with some ideas that Regis puts into action (the phone/online polls, the online classes, for example)

Noct too manages some of the intel going on during quarentine to see how the city is progressing and how else they can help.

Noctis is in charge of the interviews along the...health minister (?) everyday, while Regis stays at work and intel.

Noctis makes sure to do a livestream each certain days to greet the people, answer questions, or just have a bit of fun, and to remind them to stay home and to keep the spirits up. We know Noct would rather rot in boredome in his sofa because Sleepy Boy, but he knows the effect he has on his people, so he does the livestreams for them; to keep them entertained, informed, and simply to keep them sane.

Noctis came up with the idea of making an app/text service for those that suffer of domestic violence; “staying home” sounds easy to him because he has a huge house and a good family, but he’s aware that not do everyone. 

(Putting a keep reading here)

Noctis

Sleeps it away lmao

Honestly Noct doesn’t have much troubles with the whole “stay home” thing. He likes home. He LOVES staying home. LET HIM STAY EVEN AFTER QUARENTINE IS OVER.

Noct has videogames and his bed. You don’t need to tell him twice to stay home. 

Noct sleeps most of the day. 

Noct decides to not shower everyday.

The only trouble Noct goes through is that his room starts getting super messy everyday and Ignis isn’t going to appear to help him out. 

Noctis spends his time doing homework and mumbling about how “teachers didn’t use to give us this much homework until quarentine, this is just their excuse goddammit fuck this shit”

I feel you Noct

Besides that, videogames, trash food, and sleeping.

It’s 9 pm, he’s in pajamas. That he hasn’t taken off in three days. 

It’s 6 am and Noct is out of bed. He hasn’t slept since 2 am.

What is this guy’s sleep schedule.

Despite the careless and carefree attitude, Noct still worries. He still has to stay the most informed, as the prince, of the international and national situation, and it sometimes gets stressful.

When Noct sees numbers grow and a gloomy future, he gets stressed but won’t say it; that careless attitude is his way of coping. Like pretending it’s not true.

Noct worries about the poor, too, and the low and working class. He too came up with more ideas along with Regis to keep them safe too and not force them to work while the middle and upper classes stay indoors like it’s not the big deal.

Noct thinks a lot about Prompto. He knows he doesn’t need to go out too much, but he also knows how much of a terribly, horribly emotional distress Prom is in when staying at his house for too long.

Noct takes up on video-phoning Prom, everyday. His best boy can’t be sad, stressed, or messed up, and he’s going to keep him sane and cheer him up everyday. 

Noct may or may have not ended up inviting Prompto to spend quarentine at the Citadel with him. He hadn’t finished saying it when Prom was already at the Citadel’s door asking to be sanitized before going in.

If he got sick, everyone around him would be more scared than him LMAO

“OHNOTHEPRINCEISILLHE’SGOINGTODIEIAMNOTREADYFORTHISNOOOOOOOOO” 

Noct: so can I skip online school like this?

He’d be looked after with almost paranoia, there’s only two of the Lucis Caelum alive and honestly losing the heir and only one that can have kids at this point to the virus woulnd’t be very epic on history books

Noct IS worried, just pretending he’s not. 

Noct is going to avoid Regis LIKE A PRO. He’s going to ask to live somewhere else, will ask to sanitize his room and keep it locked, will ask that Regis gets nowhere near ANY of his belongings. Basically, Noct is going CRAZY over avoiding Regis...so Regis doesn’t catch it :’’( 

What a pure bean

Even if Regis tries visiting him, and even if the whole place is sanitized and like a little bubble away of the rest of the world, Noct will still not want him to come inside. 

Honestly, this is going to make Regis really, deeply sad and maybe even hurt. He wants to stay positive, but he keeps thinking of what if Noct dies to it, and not only dies, he’d also die without having held him for a last time or seen him.

They meet through the window. They phone each other and just touch through the closed window... :’) </3

Noct knows he may be over protecting Regis, but he’s honestly not going to have it any other way. He has way more than enough watching his old man grow old too fast from the Ring to run the risk of giving him this stupid virus. If he has to make his old man sad in order to keep him healthy, SO BE IT. 

Ignis

He’s fine.

He’s just so cool with this.

“Ah, of course. A plague. It was our turn, as was expected.”

...w...what are you talking about, Ignis.

He’s barely impressed. 

Master of following instructions, they told Ignis to stay home and THAT he did.

The store? The neighbor? Just an inch outside his main door? NO. THAT’S NOT INDOORS.

It’s not that he’s paranoid, he’s just not bothered by the idea fo not going out and he knows that the more he stays home the faster this will pass that he just. Stays in, sometimes not even looking out the window for a day or two.

Ignis still phones Noct each two days to remind him his room is messy do something because I won’t, or do nothing, the cockroaches will help you with the crumbs and leftovers in a day more.

Ignis isn’t bored. He still has home office and paperwork to do, the poor, young, miserable thing. 

In his spare time he likes doing stuff he likes, as he normally didn’t have the time to do. 

Ignis is making sure to call the other chocobros to make sure they’re ok. He’s particularly attentive to Prompto.

Boy is having video calls with Gladio because Best Friends. 

Ignis attempts to do as your raccoonie; will try to finish two-week worth of his paperwork in one or two days t o have the rest of the time free LMAO

(I hope, unlike me, he’s succeeding at that)

Ignis worries mostly about others and the outside Lucis. He takes up on the advantage of being bros with the prince to suggest something, that Noct can suggest to Regis to make it better for as many people as possible.

If he got sick, he’d attend hospital and not go out until he’s 100% okay AND spent 2 weeks with no fall back into it. 

He’d thank the doctors and nurses like every five minutes honestly. Iggy appreciates they’re doing such high risk job, keeps admiring them. Dammit.

He would accept no visits. Is it the prince? tell him to FUCK OFF. 

Mostly the throne family Ignis won’t dare visit even after he’s healed.

“IGNIS IT’S OK YOU’VE BEEN FINE FOR A MONTH”

“TALK TO ME WHEN QUARENTINE IS OVER AND/OR THERE IS A VACCINE, GET THE FUCK OFF MY FRONT YARD”

Ignis is not overly worried about the illness. He has stupidly strong defenses and can see himself getting out of this. He worries just what’s normal but keeps spirits up with all the numbers of healed cases.

Go Iggy! 

Gladio

Surprisingly, he’s taking this really well.

Gladio’s sort of more scared than the rest at the news; he was so prepared for physical enemies, the idea of an abstract, non-physical one suddenly sweeps him off his feet.

But he handles it well. So long he doesn’t watch the news.

Gladio won’t listen or read the news on the virus; he’s aware of it, he’ll take care and be careful, but he won’t read or hear numbers or updates, he’ll just live this out until it’s over.

Gladio takes his mind off it with indoor exercising, lots of it. 

Gladio’s job was mostly physical, so he takes on the advantage that he has nearly no chances of home office to do stuff he likes; mostly, this nerd will drown in history documentaries on KupoTube, will watch the equivalent of Disney and Dreamwork movies, will read like the world is ending, and will take up on online courses.

He likes crafts. Okay? Leave him alone and let him give his baby steps into watercolor painting. 

Gladio is video calling Noctis. To force him to exercise LMAO

“OY, NOCT, THIS IS PRE-RECORDED, DO YOU THINK I’M AN IDIOT? COME BACK HERE TO YOUR COMPUTER OR IT’LL BE WORSE”

Gladio is holding back a Desperate-To-Go-Out Iris.

She’s not irresponsible, she just HATES INDOORS LET ME GO OUT IT’LL BE JUST AROUND THE BLOCK

Gladio’s not letting Jared go ANYWHERE

“SOMETHING HAPPENS TO YOU AND I DIE, YOU STAY HERE, I’LL GO BUY GROCERIES AND DON’T YOU DARE GET ANYWHERE NEAR ME AFTER I’M BACK UNTIL I’VE SHOWERED”

Gladdy it’s ok :’)

A bit paranoid when it comes to others, though will still be a bit paranoid about himself.

Gladio is mostly calm about it; just a few times every now and then he’s stressed and a bit too troubled for an easy sleep.

Video calls Iggy every day because Best Friends.

Iggy keeps him sane, the baby :’(

Honestly, Gladio also makes sure that Ignis is ok. Ignis is always looking after all other three, but Gladio is who’s most aware of looking after Ignis. Ignis won’t say it, but he’s probably feeling very lonely after a month indoors, as his family won’t pay much attention to him. Gladio’s making sure to keep him happy, distracted, and in good spirits, and in company.

If he got sick, he’d probably have a very bad emotional time at first.

Gladio would cry and think nearly for sure that he’s dead already.

Not like in drama, he would seriously get sad and be very, very scared :’(

Same than Noct, he wouldn’t let Clarus near him or any of his belongings, nor Jared. Not Iris either, of course, but he worries more for the older men.

Gladio would probably not do very well emotionally in hospital. He’d spend there the necessary time, but then he would probably like most to be in an apartment for himself if available or in his room without letting anyone near. 

Gladio will keep thinking of the chances to live or die, of how scary the idea of a virus with no cure is, will get really gloomy and negative on it.

His family try to provide emotional support, but every time they call Gladio just drowns himself in ideas like what their family would do if he died and it just makes him sadder

The doctors and Iggy are what keep his spirits up, to be honest.

The sadness lasts the first days. AFter that, Gladio’s going to handle the ilness like a DAMN WARRIOR

“YOU INJECT THAT THING, DOC, BRING IT ON”

A new treatment and the consequences are unsure? BRING IT ON.

Whatever it is, Gladio’s HEAD IN FOR IT

Baby boy just needed some time to process it. After that he’s just taking it so lightheartedly, even the doctors get cheered up at his bright attitude towards it.

“You’ve progressed on a 1%”

“HELL YEAH ONE PERCENT!!!!!!!!!!! :D”

What a beautiful boy omg

Prompto

This one is the chocobro that REALLY gets hit by quarentine.

Prompto’s not hyperactive, he can stay indoors if they ask him to...the problem is his house.

Prompto gets easily anxious staying at home for too long. He spent his childhood locked away in there, isolated. No parents, no friends, nothing. He stayed locked away in what was the toughest moments of his life. He doesn’t hate indoors, he hates indoors at his house. It brings all of that back.

Prompto’s trying to keep all the lights on to make it less like in his childhood; gets easily guilty remembering the huge debt the King put himself into so he doesn’t have to pay for electricity and now he’s wasting it. 

Prompto gets easily anxious around food nowadays. Remembers it was staying indoors doing but eat what got him so fat and lonely.

(Prommy it’s ok, fat is not bad :(( this poor angel )

Honestly Prompto’s so busy emotionally stressing over being indoors at his house that the pandemic in the world isn’t even super concerning, it’s just as if there was a storm outside; he knows it’s bad and that not everyone can stay safe from it, but he’s just worried in his own situation at home.

His parents get to stay indoors with him for home office, which is as good as it is bad.

For some reason it’s not so comforting because it makes Prompto think of how absent they used to me. For some reason, it also IS comforting because unlike his childhood, at least they’re there now.

Prompto tries to make the best out of this and tries bonding with them when they’re not busy.

It actually works <3 They don’t get overly emotional or anything but they get to spend some good time together, watch movies, talk more, etc.

It helps Prom with the food issue that Dad does the cooking this time.

Good as his parents are with him during quarentine, it’s home, like the physical place what keeps gnawing at his emotional health.

Prom is going to try EVERYTHING to keep himself distracted. 

Iggy phones him constantly, which helps a lot. Noct videocalls him everyday, which really keeps him up.

Prom is taking BUNCHES of online courses and classes, bECAUSE THIS BOY LOVES DOING AND LEARNING STUFF

Week 6 of quareantine, Prompto has made his own jacket out of kitchen towels. It’s...actually impressive.

If he got sick, he too would be paranoid.

More than sad, Prompto would be openly scared and nervous.

EXTRA

The chocobros as a Four:

They’re having online video parties and meetings.

The four got a pizza each. They’re video meeting, and pretending it’s the same pizza lol

“YOU ATE THE LAST SLICE HOW DARE YOU, I TOLD YOU I WANTED IT!!! >:’‘(”

The guys are showing their quarentine achievements to each other.

“Look, I’ve let my feet nails long because I don’t need shoes anymore and I shaped them like I’m a dragon haha”

“Oi look, I learned a new trick with my yo-yo”

“Look how GREASY my hair is right now haha. what do you mean if I’m attending the national interview later like this, of course I am”

The chocobros are sending each other online courses that they think the others or one of them will like

They’re having one of those online movie in different computers together. 

Also multiplayer games because they can.

Ignis wins every time. 

The chocobros are playing a 4-members Squad mode in Battle Royale games. Noct and Prom are okay. Ignis is the Pro. Gladio is the bait.

Iris:

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Cor: 

Cor is surprisingly calm about this.

Cor is spending his time meditating.

Cor has barely any paperwork, as his work is mostly physical, so he gets a lot of time free with Regis’ politics for a proper literally-no-need-to-go-out politics. Meditation that is.

Cor is phoning Prompto each now and then, too. 

Prompto would answer happily that he’s fine and with no virus. Cor finally once tells him he’s not asking if he’s ok about the virus. Prom needed no more explanation and just said he was ok, if a little sad.

Cor is working out at home.

Cor is getting bored.

Cor is reading, watching series, or meditating, or cooking just for the sake of it.

Cor just has one problem.  He’s a workaholic. You give him no work, this man starts slowly having a meltdown and descent into the abyss of madness. He needs to die of stress, how else do you expect him to live?

The first weeks were fine. After the first few weeks Cor starts getting anxious about needing work to do.

Cor you stupid thing 

Cor is starting to get distracted in meditation because he keeps getting anxious about working in something.

Cor starts phoning Regis.

“Do you have any paperwork for me now?”

This is every two days. 

Regis COULD have given him something. Regis doesn’t. Cor needs to learn to know how to be AT PEACE FOR FUCKING ONCE.

Cor is making paperwork up to work on lol

Cor was diagnosed with the virus. They put the virus in quarentine for its safety. 

[moons-and-stars-and-shit]

Hii! May i ask for a slice of cake? (If you can ofc)

So im a INFP-T virgo im also 4"11 i have dark brown hair it because wayy lighter near the sun. Also dark brown eyes my hair is cut kinda like a shag like the front is cut but the back isn't (bc of my parents) my style is grunge ig? Im very inlove with fairy style Smm but because im broke i cant really fulfil my love for that style (also probably because of my parents). My body is???? Okay my boobies are medium size and no unfortunately I don't have a fat ass 😕 im not chubby but at the same time im not skinny. Like the most fat goes to my tummy I get rolls when I sit down bath blah you get my point (im pretty insecure about it lolol). One of my two main dreams is to study abroad and become an interior decorator.

I dont know how to describe my personality but I will try. My best friend always tells me that my sense of humour is downhill BAD. I would laugh at the dumbest shit ever for example i laughed one of those pixilated bugs pics with random names on the bottom 💀 also I laugh at my own trauma and stuff that shouldn't be laughed at. I kinda have anger issues 😕 I get unmotivated pretty easily. I rant to my best friend alot and she says that im ✨depressed✨ and have ✨anxiety✨ and that i need therapy. Im scared to rant to my parents because im "too young and its just my hormones". Something that I found out about myself this year is i have chill tics 😦 (from anxiety). Outside im nice and sweet but on the inside my mind is just saying other things. Im SOMETIMES cold and say what's on my mind but thats to my close ones like my mom dad or friends. I dont lie going Outside alot I think school is kinda useless. I like to draw and listen to music my fav artist are mother mother and mitski.

I hope i didn't say TOO much anyway thank youu I hope you have/had a great day :)

🍰 for @shotosimp2

Romantic Matchup

Oikawa Tooru

How yall met

Ok im ngl

Y'all had know clue who each other were

Well that's a lie

Of course you knew who Oikawa was

But you just didn't care

Now Oikawa always saw you around school

You know...in the school uniform

But one day

He saw you outside of school in all of your grunge glory

And apart of him was like bitch wtf

And the other was like ok queen i see you 😗

So he approached you and complimented your outfit

And you said thanks and then ran off to wherever you were heading

Wait

You just said thanks???

No fan girling????

Not even a blush??????

Nothing????????????

OIKAWA.EXE HAS STOPPED WORKING

Ok he would understand that reaction if you were just a stranger on the street

But you went to school with him?

So you had to know who he was right?

Yeah my mans had a whole ass crisis because you didn't have a bigger reaction

The next day he went to Iwa and told him about his interaction with you

And he was just like not everyone was to like you ya know

Oikawa: >:o

Then Iwa had a brilliant idea

Get this

Maybe

Oikawa should BEFRIEND you before expecting you to want to talk to him

Wild theory I know

So now Oikawa had a new goal

Befriending you

It actually wasn't that hard since you both had a lot of classes together

Soon enough you guys became close friends

And oikawa was happy with just being your friend

At least...he thought he was

But everything changed when you told him you were going to study abroad for 3 months

And even though you had each others numbers

Everything without you just seemed so dull

Omg

Did he really have feelings for you?

The more time that passed by the more he was sure that he liked you

Like LIKED liked you

So the day you came back to Japan is when he confessed to you

And well you'd be lying if you said you hadn't caught feelings for him too

So you said yes

What they love about you

He loves how normal you treat him

Now hell admit when he first met you he kinda wanted you to treat him like a celebrity

Expected it even

But the more time he spent around you

The more he realized how much he liked being treated normally

Ok screw what your friend says

He loves your humor!

Yall will laugh at the dumbest shit

If we were to look at you and Oikawa's messages

85% of it would be dumb ass memes

And honestly

This boy makes jokes about his trauma too

“Hey Y/N you wanna hear a joke?”

“Sure”

“My existence”

“...”

“...”

“Ayyyyy”

“Ayyyyy”

He loves how easy it is to talk to you

Like he's told you things he hasn't even told Iwa before

And Iwa is his CHILDHOOD BESTIE

So yeah

Trust between you two

ASTRONOMICAL

What you love about them

You love how supportive he is

If you say you wanna do something

He is right behind you cheering you on

You could tell him you want to commit arson

And he'd just be like

Period queen ill bring the gasoline 💅

You can always count on this man to be in your corner

Speaking of

You can always count on oikawa period

Which is another thing that you love about him

If oikawa is anything

He is a man of his word

If he says hes gonna do something

You know he's gonna do it

He's just overall a really reliable person

You love how he just seems to motivate you to do better

Fr after you guys started dating your grades went

Partly because you felt like you needed to compete with him

But mostly because he just motivates and pushes you to do better

And if you do improve on something

He is HYPING you up

“That's my baby! I knew you could do it!”

Favorite things to do together

Yall love to just go to the store and window shop

Im sorry but yall are some broke hoes

So most of the time it's just you guys trying on clothes in the dressing room

Taking pictures of your outfits

Then leaving

Yeah the store employees kinda hate you…

But who cares what they think

And if you two do have some pocket cash you'll buy one or two things

Then blow the rest of your money on that good mall food

Cause why not

Random Hc

He makes fun of your guys height difference ALL THE TIME

But like, can you blame him????

You're not even 5 feet tall!!!

“Imagine being the size of a 10 year old, couldn't be me”

Imagine being taller than the national average height 😐, couldn't be me”

“Touche”

He let you dress him up as an E-Boy ONCE

Ngl tho he dug the eyeliner look 😗

He called you every day while you were studying abroad

He even sent you a oikawa plushie

You may or may not have sent him a video of you drowning it

When you came back to Japan he legit TACKLED you in the middle of the airport

Astrology

Virgo + Cancer

Compatibility 80%

Cancer and Virgo can have a wonderful connection and are usually brought together by sexual understanding.

The main problem of their relationship is in the possible conflict between emotional Cancer and reasonable Virgo.

If they manage to overcome this, accepting each other’s shortcomings and learning to incorporate some rationality or some emotion into their lives, they could end up in an inspiring relationship that will last for a very long time.

In a way, they complement each other as much as the heart complements the mind.

If they share a spark of love, it would be a shame to miss the opportunity for happiness just because of someone’s irrational expectations or someone’s closed heart.

If someone can help Virgo build their trust, it is their Cancer partner.

Although Cancer is a cardinal sign, they are stable by nature, especially when it comes to emotional decisions they have made.

If they have chosen Virgo to be their loving partner, they will have no reason to lie or cheat.

This behavior would only endanger their vision of a shared life and a loving family they want with the partner they chose.

This is also a reason why Cancer won’t have an initial problem with trusting Virgo.

Their convictions are stronger than their doubt.

Overall Aesthetic

Grunge Glamour ✨

Songs -

Tia tamera (Doja Cat)

Verbratem (mother mother

Literal Legend (Ayesha Erotica)

Hayloft (mother mother)

Stupid (ashnikko)

[dorkylittleweirdo]

crazy shit that happened during high school

freshman year:

my favorite teacher (pe coach) ended up being a pedophile. it’s kinda scary to think about bc like,, that was my favorite teacher and i trusted him and if he tried anything with me i don’t think i would’ve stopped him and just yikes. but yeah, it was a whole thing. once the school found out they got the police involved and he fled the state. they got him in the end but i mean,, i spent a lot of time in the secretary’s office crying about it bc i really trusted that dude and i was distraught over it. that might’ve been where my trust issues started??? fun stuff

my school shut down. like i mean,, bc it was a charter school and we had to get the charter renewed. but the board at my school wasn’t using their money the way they were supposed to. it was a whole thing, like the principal left that school year bc he knew what was happening, couldn’t stop them from doing it, and didn’t want to be part of it. so they had a lot of meetings that us kids were allowed to go to so we could see what was happening and all that. i only went to one and it was A Time bc the lady who was recording everything passed tf out and of course nobody was a doctor and my pipsqueak thirteen year old ass went “i know what to do” bc i Did so i had to help her which was a trip in and of itself. but anyways, the school’s charter got denied, and everyone had to transfer, but the district promised that we could go to any school we wanted, not just the one we would have to go to by zip code

sophomore year:

i ended up going to a private christian school. big fucking mistake. absolute disaster. nothing really happened that was crazy by their standards, but it was for me

so they have a house system. think of harry potter, it’s EXACTLY like that. we have points, we have competitions, we have all that extra stuff. it was such a time, like i don’t,, i don’t even know how to explain how fucking weird that shit was

i came out in the middle of class. the principal’s daughter was our sub and she goes “okay so everyone is gonna tell us something that nobody knows about them” so when it was my turn i go “so it’s not a secret and y’all should know this but clearly y’all don’t: i’m not straight”. silence. dead silence. we could hear the class next to us it was so quiet. some girl whispers “i knew it”. another girl leans over and whispers to my friend “i’m so sorry”. principal’s daughter gives me the most threatening, condescending smile i’ve ever seen and goes “thanks for sharing”. i had to come out to my mom that same day bc i told me friends and they panicked on my behalf bc when people found out that they were gay, the principal told their parents. and i was Not about to be outed by the principal. my mom has since told me that the principal never contacted her about it so i came out for nothing but i mean i really like being out so we’re good

so instead of prom, cult school has this thing called “the ball”. sophomores, juniors, and seniors are allowed to go bc there’s less than fifty people per grade so if sophomores don’t come, there’s not enough people. so i went bc my friends were all going and i was like “yeah why not might as well”. three dance lessons. three fucking dance lessons for this stupid ball that i didn’t dance once at. i literally had three panic attacks in the span of an hour at the second one, and then i had swim practice right after. fucking exhausted. felt like i ran five marathons by the time i got home. the last lesson i didn’t do any dancing, just vibed with my friend in the corner. so at the actual ball, same friend and i vibed at the tables the whole time. we went to the bathroom for like an hour and took mirror selfies and tried to make our asses look bigger bc we’re Like That

SO AFTER THE BALL, there was apparently a massive party and there was alcohol and stuff. so my friends and i were blissfully unaware bc nobody liked us bc who tf likes the school sinners. so we walked to get ice cream after in our fucking ballgowns and suits looking like All That. so the principal thought that it was one of us who hosted the party and we were like “??? what party?”. literally almost got in trouble bc the principal thought we were LYING. i told my mom and she takes No Shit, so when the principal called her demanding to know if i went to/hosted the party, she marched her ass down to the school and was like “i know y’all have something against mexicans and people who are different from y’all, but that’s no reason to blame my daughter for something that your so called “perfect” students did”. my mom got Heated, roasted the fuck out of the principal, then LEFT. principal never fucked with my mom after that

so there was a fire like across the street from the school. the fd told us to evacuate, but noooooo the school was like “god will protect us” i’m like “okay but i’m gay and apparently your god hates that so i think we’re gonna Perish”. the fucking POWER went out and they STILL wouldn’t let us go. my mom called to sign me out so i could go wherever the fuck i wanted in the school until my friend’s dad came to pick us up bc she couldn’t get there bc of the fire. so i vibed next door to my friends’ class and i was like “heeeeey god’s trying to kill the gays” and we laughed about that until my gay ass got saved lmaoooo

okay so this is the funniest memory i have. in chemistry once, our teacher took us outside and started digging a lil hole next to the school. and keep in mind, my chem teacher used to be a hardcore atheist druggie, like fucking meth and coke and shit. took a theology course and converted. so he’s really sweet and nice but he’s also Slightly mad scientist vibes. so anyways, he puts something in this little hole, lights it on fire. i forgot why he did it, but i was standing back with him and one of the exchange students and the three of us watch in Horror as the rest of the class makes a circle around the fire and start doing some weird dance and saying something. it wasn’t like a chant, idk what to call it, but they were like counting like “and one, and two, and three, and four” and then the dance would get more intense and they’d get louder. so eventually they were screaming and going apeshit and i looked at my teacher and he’s just,, watching them do this. i’m like “and i’m satan, huh?”. like these kids really trying to summon the devil but i’m the bad one bc i like girls

junior year:

so technically this was during the summer but i’m putting it here. they have like a house party after the school year ends. i made cookies. apparently they “looked weird” so nobody ate them, two of my soon to be teachers kept insulting them. i called my mom to pick me up, took my cookies with me, got back in the car in tears. had to have a whole conversation with the principal and those two teachers so they could apologize bc i wanted to leave the school after that. dw tho, i took my cookies to the guards at my summer camp and they appreciated the hell out of them bc they were Very Good Cookies

so my ap bio teacher was an enabler. i was his favorite bc i wasn’t a religious nut and it was very obvious that i believed in science and not whatever the hell this cult was doing with their creationist bs. also he was a parasitologist and i’m super into parasitology so he had fun talking about it to someone who both understood and was extremely interested in the topic. i rolled up to class one day like “hey so i’m gonna buy hissing cockroaches from amazon, if my parents find out and don’t let me keep them do you want them??” and he’s like “yeah”. i brought them to class a few times and everyone Hated it but my teacher was like ayyyyy. and everyone thought he was either and atheist or agnostic, so when some girl asked how he thought mary conceived jesus to see what he said, he looked at me like “y’all hear somethin/hel p” and i go “parthenogenesis” and he Went With It, talking about how it was theoretically possible in humans but we ignored the fact that the baby would’ve been a girl bc the class is dumb none of them have ever heard of parthenogenesis before jesus is the true trans icon we all need

my art teacher was my favorite and she knows that i’m gay. she’s the only teacher from my school that i’m still in contact with. so every big project we did, i made it gay. and i knew, and my friends knew, and she knew, but the rest of the class had no idea. i’m like presenting my project and the class would get sus and they’re like “so are those two really good friends” and i’m like “so she has a rainbow heart on her choker and she has a lesbian symbol on her shirt”. the class was still confused and my friend yells “they’re LESBIANS”. it was iconic

my brit lit teacher was bi. she never said it, but i know she was. always talked about how much she hated men, then was like “women are very very good”. no way this woman was straight. so we read dracula and it’s got that Subtext, so one time i leaned over to my friend bc he sat next to me and i go “the Homoerotic Subtext”. and i didn’t realize that the teacher was right in front of me until she tapped my desk and goes “it gets better”, told me a page number that i flipped to, and it was Even More Gay and i was like 😏. also she assigned me a gay poet for my poetry project and i talked about that for my whole presentation in front of the class and it was the biggest paragraph in my essay and i got 100% on it even tho i choked at the beginning. also i mentioned in passing that i liked sappho and she goes “ooh i love sappho” i’m like “ma’am please leave this cult and get you a gf”

senior year:

i left the cult finally. went to the one school i actually liked. i made friends who actually like me and they were patient and they were amazing and i love them all very much even if i’ll never tell them. my classmates were great, v friendly, i had a great time. however,

so many fires. school got cancelled like five times bc of how bad the fires were

the school shooting. i don’t think i need to go further into that, it’s pretty self explanatory

covid. again, don’t need to go further into that, v self explanatory

[caepaecaesurae]

> Cae + Nad : Gossip

caepaecaesurae So I'm getting better about lovwers trolljacksparrow yeah? caepaecaesurae I'm actually trying all that again A bit trolljacksparrow ooh anyone specific in mind/any takers yet, lovve?

caepaecaesurae I appear to havwe horrible taste Or At least slightly questionable trolljacksparrow ehehehehehhe cmon cmon wwho is it caepaecaesurae Oh tsk like you'vwe nevwer had that realisation about anything you'vwe wvillingly gotten yourself into ... Ringleader, twvice. trolljacksparrow ringleader??????/ ring???? leader??????? RINGLEADER????? caepaecaesurae I wvas a trickster one of those times and it turned out fine, so trolljacksparrow ring "HHuHhHHhurrrgghhhh ive never submitted to anything not even a stoplight, hurggggghhhh, i am very tough sexually everyone needs to know this" leader??? caepaecaesurae You knowv, wve're both old and lazy and get bored trolljacksparrow oh my god??? (dont misunderstand, i support you!) but oh my god! caepaecaesurae Honestly, entirely reasonable trolljacksparrow HONEY, howw is your taste so bad! ....ok but howw did it go caepaecaesurae Also your description is delightful I don't knowv, magic? trolljacksparrow ehehehehehehe caepaecaesurae Wvell, it wvent wvell enough for a second round trolljacksparrow ayyyyy/ caepaecaesurae It's purposefully a bit intermittant to avwoid getting terribly attached, but I think there'll be a third at some point trolljacksparrow (terribly attached on wwhich side?) i wwould literally nevver havve seen this coming. like. literally nevver. caepaecaesurae wvell, I'm stupid and he's prone to obsession, so either wvay, really. trolljacksparrow if someone wwas like  "dude, dude, your kismesis is gonna bang that one guy (tm)" i wwould not havve believved them pffff holy fuck man ok but honestly, good on you trolljacksparrow hell yeah highfivve caepaecaesurae haha High fivwe, chief. I havwe no idea wvhat I'm doing wvith myself, but.. it's good to get out there. And he's not all bad.  If you scoot the bad bits off the plate there's things left It's alright trolljacksparrow yeah, i actually like got along wwith him that one time after he freaked out that i wwas going to do vviolence upon him hes not all bad, surprisingly >That 'haha' kinda makes you feel bad. Should you be, like, more supportive? Or something? caepaecaesurae "I'm thinking of you naked" wvas the line that wvorked on him by the wvay. trolljacksparrow FUCK L O L caepaecaesurae He wvas surprised trolljacksparrow FANTASTIC caepaecaesurae It wvas pretty good trolljacksparrow nice!! you fuckin smooth operator hahahahaha caepaecaesurae I don't remember wvhat it wvas during the trickster thing I think it wvas something like "I'm easy and interested" I havwe no idea wvhat people consider smooth or wvhy trolljacksparrow ehehehehehe yeah honestly most of the times me neither but dude, lets celebrate, like, hell yeah broadening horizons and all that noise caepaecaesurae :) trolljacksparrow ://) !! caepaecaesurae Te amo trolljacksparrow te amo! tea ammo! all of that! trolljacksparrow (fucking ringleader. unbelievable.) trolljacksparrow (TWWELVVE FEET TALL) caepaecaesurae He's rather fond of my teeth I'm not used to getting compliments about that that don't sound like comparisons to beartraps trolljacksparrow thats a mood sexy sexy beartraps caepaecaesurae He's also remarkably considerate and careful WVith a backup just in case trolljacksparrow thats fantastic! a backup? like, threesomes? caepaecaesurae wvell I meant my extra teeth Most beartraps havwe only the one rowv trolljacksparrow OH yeah ivve nevver hunted bears, i dont knoww i thought it tied into the considerate part and like yeah that wwould be considerate but clarification wwas needed caepaecaesurae Aye, I'm not quite up to several-somes yet trolljacksparrow you can wwork up to it, it takes time to build stamina ://P caepaecaesurae Speaking of Ringleader though, do you see the post he responded to?  The one wvhere cherry shrimp spoke up trolljacksparrow ....im trying to imagine sollux vvantas on a date wwith ringleader "fucking ringleader" makara and i am FAILING MISERABLY caepaecaesurae Same It's almost majestic trolljacksparrow just. i cant picture them in the same room evven but just caepaecaesurae Nowv try to imagine his moirail's spin on this trolljacksparrow the mind cant handle that many possiblities oh my goD HAHAHAHAHA caepaecaesurae This is entirely my fault and I can't find myself minding trolljacksparrow you arrange beautiful things, sometimes caepaecaesurae The boy's a damn boxer and I think Ringleader wvould respect that trolljacksparrow he is, but hes also like i mean i dont think ringleader is immune to sollux vvantas cause NO ONE IS, APPARENTLY caepaecaesurae Sollux VWantas. trolljacksparrow JUST LOOK AT HIM AUGH sollux vvwwantas anywway i still cant fucking picture it but if it happens itll be glorious caepaecaesurae Imagine Sollux VWantas and Ringleader aiming for casual lovwers, and the moirail wvandering directly into a terrible pitch court wvith Ringleader if she isn't already spoken for in pitch trolljacksparrow i mean, hed probably find a lot of wways to piss her off, but that? wwould end in fire caepaecaesurae She'd be a brat, and his dedication to her health wvould rest entirely on her moirail's shoulders And as wve all knowv, Sollux VWantas trolljacksparrow yea wwe really do then again ringleader, wwho is apparently super blunt, might be the only person to be blunt enough for the boy wwho didnt realize wwhat pinching someones ass indicated caepaecaesurae I think Ringleader is the only responsible adult invwolvwed, and that's going to be fascinating to hear about ovwer drinks somenight trolljacksparrow ovver a lot of drinks caepaecaesurae Probably it wvon't go anywvhere caepaecaesurae But it's interesting to think about trolljacksparrow hahahaha yeah caepaecaesurae Anywvay I thought I'd keep you in the loop About Ringleader "Yes that one" Makara trolljacksparrow i appreciate it! keep me in the loop about any others, yeah? (like im fine wwith evverything i just. wwant gossip) caepaecaesurae I'll try dearest If it evwer comes to someone wvhere the secret wvould be hard but important to me to keep, wvould you rather struggle wvith it or not be technically sure? trolljacksparrow wwho could you possibly fuck that requires covvert ops, babe but like caepaecaesurae If someone has clade wvho are vwiolently opposed to highbloods for example, or wvho havwe terrible history wvith Amporas specifically ... caepaecaesurae If someone has clade wvho mistrust me specifically due to some long-ago argument If I evwer make it wvith a VWriska trolljacksparrow ok i just gotta outline that if anyone tries to mess wwith you ill hand them their spine noww that thats done wwith hhm, i dont knoww. like... i wwant to support you, yeah? but also, like, im just......i wwouldnt betray you, evver caepaecaesurae Oh surely, and I appreciate it caepaecaesurae I knowv you wvouldn't I'm just asking if you'd prefer juicy gossip, or havwing things easy not havwing to keep track of wvho knowvs wvhat trolljacksparrow im thinking about that because on one hand fuuuuck i lovve gossip but on the other hand i often havve a hard time wwith like not freaking out ovver direct lying? so its like wwhat are the odds that someone comes up to me and is like HEY ARE CAE AND X FUCKING and im unable to say 'hey. fuck you' (id do it anywway, like, despite the thing, it just might not be effectivve) so its like caepaecaesurae Higher than you'd think, hypothetically! trolljacksparrow make your best judgment of like wwhat thats just like, my clade i guess is it only hypothetically? caepaecaesurae ... There's someone else, and I do think you'd havwe an easier time of it if I'm not specific.  The one you'd be trying not to lie to is Sparks, for possibly a swveep or fivwe until a fewv things wvork out. If it lasts that long caepaecaesurae But at the same time, I lovwe and trust you. trolljacksparrow mmmm yeah. caepaecaesurae And it's important I not try to ovwer-control things trolljacksparrow okay i havve no idea wwhat that means in relation to all this but like yeah, aight like, dont tell me >Man, you're put out by this more than you anticipated. trolljacksparrow >Why can't you enjoy gossip. caepaecaesurae Te amo, dearest.  If any rough spots evwer get wvorked out so secrecy isn't an issue, or if it doesn't wvork out so it can be a past-tense secret rather than an ongoing one, I'll be sure to let you knowv first thing But.. I'm getting out there, and it's rare and precious and newv, and I havwe rather awvkwvard taste But hey, wvhat else is newv trolljacksparrow sent a GIF caepaecaesurae You and Kankri are the only ones wvho knowv about a vwisit or twvo to Ringleader And you're the only one wvho knowvs he's not the only one trolljacksparrow ! i adore you trolljacksparrow once again, anyone troubles you ill fucking delimb them, but yeah caepaecaesurae WVarm thoughts for cold evwenings trolljacksparrow oh, and by the wway trolljacksparrow you offered up a lot of scenarios back then, right caepaecaesurae Back wvhen? trolljacksparrow back wwhen i wwas like oh dude wwhat reason could you possibly havve to havve a tactical dick appointment relying on james bondery and secrecy caepaecaesurae Aye, that I did trolljacksparrow and you specifically mentioned making it wwith a vvriska... caepaecaesurae Sparks looks rather dimly on those trolljacksparrow that he does, that he does but also trolljacksparrow also wwell caepaecaesurae Unrelated sidenote, I'm trading holiday gifts wvith his VWriska nowv and again. trolljacksparrow stop interrupting my dramatic fucking revveal for fucks sake! are you a bloody ampora or wwhat! fucking unbelievvable caepaecaesurae She's dead, but her ghost is about. You're wvelcome and I am suddenly all ears trolljacksparrow thank god! okay anywway funny you should mention making it wwith a vvriska.... because i got c3<ed to one for like half a swweep. (AAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY DID FUCKING ANYONE SEE THAT COMING) caepaecaesurae Ashen? Absolutely baffled trolljacksparrow yes, topleaf! caepaecaesurae But nowv that you mention it, I can only think of one that you speak to much online... trolljacksparrow ://) caepaecaesurae WVell damn Good showv keeping that one quiet, howv havwe you managed? caepaecaesurae Keeping it off Sparks' radar alone must havwe been tricky trolljacksparrow ://)!! trolljacksparrow yeah!! theres some people that knoww but not a lot and ITS SO DIFFICULT i just wwant to openly affection at her but  i cant my beautiful sharp fighty ashenmate caepaecaesurae Side-leavwes, or is one of you the top? trolljacksparrow im the topleaf! she's a marvvel and a delight and she brightens my life and this is a god damn secret, okay angel? caepaecaesurae Swvorn and sealed trolljacksparrow i asked to tell you the moment you mentioned a vvriska because, oh my god, the opportunity, "in case i make it vwith a wvriska" "GUESS WWHAT (//: ", just, damn caepaecaesurae I wvish you the dearest of luck wvith her, Serkets are... tricky. trolljacksparrow she made a vvery elaborate threat against your wwell-being if you fuck this up belovved, it wwas practically ornate caepaecaesurae My good luck, then Thank you for not directly sharing the threat. trolljacksparrow you wwont mess this up though so no wworries! like theres nothing to mess up caepaecaesurae I wvon't be getting in her wvay trolljacksparrow oh honey its just "dont tell this to people" not "gtfo" caepaecaesurae Aye, all's wvell trolljacksparrow (i knoww that serkets arent rays of moonbeams though, so dont wworry) trolljacksparrow also im her topleaf so if she does get upset wwith you shed havve to talk it out wwith me caepaecaesurae I appreciate it Again, I wvon't be interfering or risking your quadrant. Believwe it or not I knowv my wvay around a secret or twvo trolljacksparrow you and your mystery beau ://P caepaecaesurae Eh That's days old I wvouldn't call it wvorth being proud of keeping quiet yet trolljacksparrow doesnt it givve such a rogueish air to the wwhole thing? also im gonna come bother you in person if youre not super busy caepaecaesurae <3< trolljacksparrow <3< !!! trolljacksparrow >Nadaya is definitely finding Cae and cuddling up to him and purring super contently. His. >He might look slightly :c but he tries very hard not to let it show. caepaecaesurae > ..and Cae's definitely a little distant-eyed and faintly sad, but very fond of cuddles and hanging out comfortably. trolljacksparrow >...Cae gets finpets, and Nadaya promptly hoists himself into Cae's lap, and sighs. "Look, fucking, she didnt actually make the threat she just told me to tell you that she made an elaborate threat, I'm sorry, I didn't realize, just look--" and you show him this: https://puu.sh/zihDF/5648ce76f9.png caepaecaesurae > His mouth opened and closed once as he absorbed that, fins shifting slightly, before pinning a bit and lowering.  His cheeks heated, lighting slightly, and he glanced away > He gave a small awkward shoulder pat, and a nod. trolljacksparrow > Nadaya kissed him directly on the tip of his nose. "I'm sorry beloved," and a hair ruffle, Nadaya is gonna be comfortable all over him. caepaecaesurae "...sorry, chief," he murmered back. trolljacksparrow "hey it's fine, it's okay, don't worry about it, yeah," Cae's neck gets nuzzled, purr starting up. This is fine, it's a fine way to spend time. caepaecaesurae "...You got wvorried enough to come ovwer." trolljacksparrow "i mean, you say this as if i dont love spending time with you?" Nadaya curled a hand in the fabric of Cae's shirt, a picture of peace on his kismesis. "you're stressed from unrelated reasons too, so its like... i dont want you to be sad," he finished lamely, sighing and nuzzling. ".............i wwouldnt let her. it wwas just, a lack-of-trust thing that manifested badly." caepaecaesurae > Arms gently closed around him, and Cae rested his cheek in Nadaya's hair, carefully, trying to avoid as many charms and knives as possible.  One or two was fine. "...Aye.  WVe'll see howv much she trusts or distrusts." "..I'll be myself, and wve'll see if that's enough." trolljacksparrow >Nadaya's purr intensified at that, fins fluttering. Hugs! Hell yeah! A part of him hoped Cae gets a weird imprint from the charms. "yeah - and, i'm serious, it wwont come to vviolence, swworn and sealed and all that." caepaecaesurae > He acquired a small smile, only slightly sad.  Nadaya was more reassuring than he had any right to be, though. "..I knowv my pan plays tricks on me, lovwe.  WVe'll see howv it goes."

[atobeinspace]

Rules: Answer 30 questions and tag 10 blogs!

I got tagged by: @momomirasaki124​ THANK YOU I LOVE THESE

Nicknames: Crevette (means shrimp in le french), Kokobro

Gender/pronouns: She/her ayyyyy

Star sign: I’M A CANCER CRYBABY

Height: 5’ 4″ average

Time: 5:00 pm

Birthday: July 12th! 

Favorite bands: K I S H I D A N  I also like Golden Bomber, Morning Musume, Momoiro Clover (Z), Yuzu, Norazo, AXS and some others but Kishidan have been my favorites for like 10 years hahaha

Favorite solo artist: T.M.Revolution and Kimeru!

Song stuck in your head: THIS FUCKING HORRIBLE CAP2BIN NEW YEAR’S SONG I’VE BEEN HEARING MOMO’S “OKKHEYYY” IN MY HEAD FOR DAYS NOW SAVE ME

Last movie you watched?: Errr I don’t really watch movies… Last one that I watched in its entirety was Moana back in september I think?

Last show?: MORNING MUSUME IN NY IN 2014 AND IT WAS AMAZING

Why did you create your blog?  I felt bad for drowning my mutuals in Tenipuri stuff on my main blog, so here I am haha

What do you post?: TENIPURI I mean that’s my Tenipuri sideblog so

Last thing you googled?: “poodle skirt” because I wanted to know if people actually wore that exact skirt in the 50′s and yes they did 

Other blogs: 

Main - @headphonesandbackpack​

Aesthetics + vegan + witchy + embroidery - @vegan-cross-stitcher

Art blog - @crevettolart

Japanese music blog - @dailyjapanesemusic

And somehow while searching for my art blog I found my very first tumblr made back in 2007 when tumblr opened???? There you go hahaha @crevettola-blog-blog

AO3: SpaghettiPepito but I don’t post shit on it. If you can read french and want really crunchy stuff, go check my ffnet (Equa) instead, I wrote Tenipuri fairytales in my teens

Do you get asks?: I HAVE ONI ANON WHO IS A BEAUTIFUL PERSON I just remembered that I forgot to make the edit for your birthday I am SO sorry ;A;

How did you get the idea for your URL?: I made this shitty edit of Miura in space and there you go hahaha I follow: Tenipuri blogs, aesthetic/nature blogs, my irl friends, jjba blogs, ddlc blogs, coolio artists, etc Followers: 64 I can’t thank you guys enough this blog has been alive for like 2/3 months and I can’t believe you enjoy my shitty content I love you so much Average hours of sleep: I always try to get 6 at the very minimum, so my average is about 7 Lucky number: 12 and 8! Instrument: My dad made me play violin when I was a child but I really sucked at it, I have no coordination and I can’t follow rythm for shit woops What are you wearing?: Cool cool and comfy pajamas yayy Dream job: Working with art I guess?? I mean that’s what I’m studying rn haha Dream trip: I am a weeb shit give me anything Japan and I go. Really tho I’d really love to go back wwoofing in Japan that was really 3 incredible weeks, they felt like a dream. It has changed me. Favorite food:  Probably pizza with a TON of mushrooms Significant other?: MY BF IS A 5′2″ 30 YEARS OLD MAN HOW AMAZING IS THAT??? We’ve been together for 8 years we’re old shits. Also not my S/O BUT my dear Kokobro deserves a shoutout I mean she’s been putting up with my shit for 12 years now I love u @drifloonlady <3 <3  Last book I read: I’ve been trying to get through The Fellowship of the Ring but I stopped because of school and haven’t got back to it woops. I’ve enjoyed it so far though! Top 3 fictional universes: BARTIMAEUS TRILOGY, Harry Potter, Undertale Tagging @tenipuri-everything, @drifloonlady, @allthekokeshis, @chloe-noir, @mofochika!!!!

[yourdevilwolf-blog]

If you could understand...

“Stupid, Stupid...STUPID.”

The loud noises of Stranglethorn Vale pierced the humid night; the sound of birds, tigers, and Loa knew what else inhabited it’s jungles surrounding the small, rather disgruntled hexxer. Zandali was uttered under a thick wooden mask as Ether once again circled the same tree for the millionth time this night, still too stubborn to admit he was lost.

Lost, in more ways then one.

The tiny elf bit his lip as he crossed his arms in front of a very slender, yet muscular chest, his beads swaying and jingling with his erratic motions, turning one way then another, too deep into the jungle to simply turn back towards camp. His stomach swayed with sickness, chest and heart tightening as the fought back the tears that stung at his eyes; he and Dey had fought again.

And as always - it was his fault. 

Ether had not understood the rogue’s words, and with more confusion came more anger, until the pair were shouting and yelling at each other from across the campfire, the hexxer taking off towards the jungle in a fit of rage. 

And now he was lost.

Ether knew Dey was a patient man, he had to be to deal with the dancer’s bullshit on a day to day basis, but he also knew Dey had his buttons, and Ether? He seemed very good at pushing those buttons with a tiny angry foot, over and over again until the rogue finally snapped; leading to the position he was in now. 

It wasn’t until Ether had trekked angrily half way through the jungle, that he realized he was wrong, and Dey hadn’t meant what he said the way the hexxer thought he had, his mistranslated mind finally wrapping around the meaning of his husband’s words with a heart sick feeling. 

Why? Why did he have to be so damn stupid? Why couldn’t he understand? If he could just understand and be smarter, he could be a better mate. Tears began to well up in his eyes again as he wiped them hastily with a slender hand, sobs resounding within his throat as he walked without a known destination. In that moment; Ether hated himself. Dey had been patiently teaching him since day one: was it truly too much to simply stop and ask the man what he meant without spitting fire? This was the man he loved, the man he slept with every night, the man who could make love to him with a single glance; Dey was his everything. 

So, why? 

Why couldn’t he just be...

He stopped suddenly, the thought halting his walking as lifeless look overcame his pale violet orbs..

Why..

couldn’t..

he...

just...

be...

normal....? 

Wouldn’t Dey be so much happier, with someone....like that? Someone who understood him, who didn’t get angry over meaningless things? Visions of Dey with another man who was better then him, in his mind, filled his senses and he bent at the middle as he used a nearby palm tree for support, his stomach was threatening to wretch as he covered his mouth with his hand. The very thought made him sick. 

Dey...was all he had.

“Ayyyyy, now lil’ love....whatcha be thinkin’ dem silly thoughts for, huh?” 

The hexxer’s gaze flew to his belt, but the shrunken head of his father was still, eerily so, and did not speak as it normally did. But there was no question; that was Ra’jin’s voice. Frantically Ether began to search the area around him, his heart slamming in his chest, his hand coming up to place his voodoo mask on the top of his golden hair as he surveyed the jungle’s depths with a panicked and desperate expression. 

“Papa? Papa?!” he called, “Papa!! Please!! Answer Ether!” 

Grass, dirt, and branches crunched with a cool air under the hexxer’s simple dirty linen bound feet, his pace picking up to a full out run as his feet pelted the ground soundly. The only light he had was the moon and stars, and neither were too bright this night, despite the moon being full the clouds seemed to be cover the Lunar goddess with it’s embrace - hindering his hunt for the voice he had known since birth. 

Where? 

“Etta...” 

A strangled gasp escaped the tiny elf’s throat, spirit’s of his ancestors swirling around him in the clearing until they became a tangible form, Ether’s violet eyes shaking as they held the image in front of him, one he had not seen in years, and he begged his small legs not to give up from under him as they quaked. Heart in his throat as he took a timid, and rather shaky, step forward.

Ra’jin.

“P-Papa....?” he questioned very lightly, “Papa..i-is that you?” 

A broad grin crossed the troll’s face, a proud glimmer in his eyes as he gave a firm nod, his staff giving a sound rap to the ground as he knocked it to get Ether’s full attention. 

“Etta, ma boy...little love, why ya be tinkin’ dem thoughts, boy?” 

Ether chewed on his lower lip as he stood only a few feet away from his Papa now, unable to believe what was before him despite his experience with spirits and his knowledge of the ancestors. For a moment he wanted to question Ra’jin as to what thought’s he was referring to, but he knew better than that, and no one knew him better than his Papa.

“I-It’s true....though, Dey would be better off...without Ether.” 

Another sharp slam to the ground, forcing the hexxer’s errant attention back to the shaman before him, the troll’s eyes narrowed skeptically at his little son.

“Did ya ask ‘em ya’self, Etta? Did ya Dey say dat ta ya?” 

“No...” 

“Den why dese silly thoughts, hmm? What be on ma lil’ raptor’s mind?” 

Ether fiddled with his skirts, thin fabric laden with gold strands and coins, and the slits on the side came clear up to his hips for easy movement. So much swirled in his mind, in his heart, and he found his fingertips ghosting over the golden band that he held so dearly. Ether had never had a ring before, and though since he’d found himself fond of them; only one had the right to adorn his left hand. 

“....Dey and Ether fought, cause Ether is so stupid. He not understand Dey, and Dey just try to help all the time....and Ether yell and scream, then Dey yell and scream because Ether yell and scream and - and - “ 

“Ayyy, sound like marriage ta ma ears, ya tink ya be the only couple dat fights, ay? Ol’ Rai’jin could tell ya a few tings den, but now ain’t ta time. Etta, Etta....ya be so hard on ya’self boy. Ya get so angry wit ya’self cause ya not be understandin’....ya don’ tink ya mate understand dat? Dey be knowin’ how ya are, Etta...he knows lil’ raptor, he knows.” 

Ether wrung his hands in front of him, eyes on the ground as he listened to the wise old Shaman’s words, tears now fully streaming down his cheeks and smearing his face paint. Every time he messed up, every time they fought, fear swallowed him whole; fear that he’d never see Dey again. He wanted so much to be part of his world, to understand his world, he pushed himself to speak Thalassian and Orcish, infuriated with himself when he couldn’t make words or misunderstood. And then that female Death Knight....Ether had felt so horrible, after all the hard work Dey had done to teach him, he felt like he failed him as she pointed out his speech. The humiliation built up in him again, and he nibbled harder on his lower lip until he felt the cold touch of death on his chin, Rai’jin’s transparent hand pulling up his chin so violet eyes met his. 

“Etta...ma boy, ma sweet boy. It gonna be otay, Rai’jin be knowin’ dis. Oh, Etta...Rai’jin was so worried ‘bout his boy...so worried. But Dey is ‘ere na, and Rai’jin not gotta worry no more ‘bout his little love. Ya safe ma boy, it’s alright...ya be safe. Jus’ follow ya Dey - he know da way.” 

Rai’jin’s last words carried weight in Ether’s heart, and the hexxer knew it to be the truth. Dey always did seem to know the way, and no matter how far the tiny elf ran, or how lost and confused the road became; Dey was always waiting with an open hand - waiting for Ether to catch up and take it. A spring broke in Ether and his small frame began shaking with sobs, eyes welling over and spilling to his cheeks and down his chin, eyes still holding his Papa’s.

His Papa. 

He’d been his world; his whole world. Now he was gone, Ether had no choice, he had to take another path; and even if he wasn’t alone it hurt. He missed his Papa with all of his heart, and fear was a constant companion that always nagged at the back of his mind. The hexxer’s words were rushed, slipping into full Zandali as he burst like a dam, heart boiling over and into form.

“B-But! What if Dey get’s tired of Ether being so stupid? What if he gives up on me, Papa? What if I become too much? He’s so handsome, Papa. So smart, he’s so smart, and I’m so slow, always struggling to keep up. If he leaves, I’ll be all alone, and my heart....Papa, I love him so much. I love him...so, so much...” 

Ether clutched his hands to his heart, eyes shaking and earnest, heart bare to the jungle air, his emotions clanging against their cage bars, eager to be free, and Rai’jin closed his eyes. Ether..his little love, had always been this way, and to Rai’jin - it was beautiful. His little boy felt so much, held so much emotion within him, yet never knew his true potential.  His Papa Rai’jin knew how smart Ether was, and wondered if he realized how much he’d advanced since his departure from the village, that his progress compared to other’s was extremely advanced. But Ether would not see it that way; only that his ignorance of the world had caused a rift between him and his husband. He would only see that he could not understand Dey, and in return had hurt his love because he had been to quick with his anger over his misunderstanding and confusion. 

Rai’jin steeled himself, praying to the Loa to anchor him to this world for a little longer so he could guide his boy one last time. The hurt and pain in those beautiful pale violet orbs tore at this soul, and how he wished he didn’t have to leave his little boy again. But he knew his time was limited; he had to make good use of it. When the troll spoke again, his voice was clear like thunder, knowing he must be stern to get Ether’s attention..

“Do ya really tink.....Dey will leave ya? Afta all dis time, all ya been through togetha’...ya tink he jus’ leave? Etta, if he were gonna get tired of ya, he’d a dun’ it already, Rai’jin know dis. Etta, dontcha’ know how important ya ‘re to ‘em? I know it be hard fo’ ya lil’ boy, but...ya gotta let ‘em lead, and try ta be a lil’ easier on ya’self. Ya so loved, ya future only jus’ begun ma boy. Ya wanna be ‘part o’ his world? Den be there with ‘em....jus’ don’t let go of his hand, Etta...don’t let go...he gonna show ya da way...” 

Slowly, Rai’jin began to slip from the physical plane, back to the spirit planes and Ether felt his heart thud and leap in his chest as he desperately grasped at the spirit’s delicate fibers in an attempt to get him to stay, helplessness grabbing him as he watched his beloved Papa fade from his sight, out of existence, and away from him, like smoke through the hexxer’s slender fingers.

“Ol’ Rai’jin be so proud of ya, Etta...do not forgot dat. Never forget I love ya my boy, my lil’ miracle...” 

“Papa!!” 

Ether shouted in utter desperation, silver wisps glittering in the moonlight as his father returned to the world beyond, a place where his ancestors were waiting, and no matter how the tiny elf tried to hold on, to chase him down, where Rai’jin went...

Ether could not follow.

“Papa!! Papa please!! Please, please....please. Don’t...go...don’t leave me.... please don’t leave me here....I need you...” 

With a thud, eyes still trained on the disappearing traces of ethereal remnants that filled the night sky, Ether fell to his knees, and slowly he fell forward, palms against the dew wet ground as he began to sob loudly, why did he have to say goodbye again? 

“P-Papa!!!! ....Papa! Ether...Ether love....you..please, come back...” 

“Etta, ya know da way, follow ya heart, ya always did...it will neva steer ya wrong. Remember what Ol’ Rai’jin tell ya....take his hand, don’tcha let go.” 

And the troll was gone, the hexxer’s sobs the only sound filling the night air, even the wildlife silent in reverence to the spirits, and once again Ether felt as lost as he did that day, the day he’d left the village with only his direhorn and a small pack of belongings. Ether had left the village to respect his father’s wishes, to learn about the world, even if it would have been easier to stay. 

“Papa...” 

There was rustle of leaves in the clearing, a few large fauna being pushed aside to make way for a darkly clad figure that walked very cautiously into the open spot, the moon finally shining it’s light past the clouds. 

“Ether...” 

Two ears gave a tilt, back and forth, to the sound he’d become so accustomed to that he could pick it out of a million voices. Rai’jin’s voice came to him again as he tried to right himself, wiping away his tears with hasty hands before he turned to face his husband, who must have spent at least a couple hours looking for him by the state of his attire. His voice cracked as he tried to speak, Dey’s eyes watching him very carefully behind the leather mask he kept clasped around his face, and concern flickered through his moonstruck orbs as Ether finally spoke up. 

“D-Dey...Ether...Ether...” 

The hexxer was desperately trying to make words, eyes falling to the dark mossy ground under him, hands wringing again nervously, a gasp rasping from his throat as a single gloved digit caught his chin, Dey now mere inches from him as he pulled his attention to him, a free hand pulling down his mask so Ether could see his face. When the two digits let go of his chin, Dey satisfied he had his attention, he slowly and reassuringly wiped away his husband’s tears, one by one, leaning forward with a fluid motion only Dey was capable of, and kissing streams left behind by emotion. 

“Dey has been looking for his Ether, silly monkey, how did you get to be so fast, huh?” 

His words were soft, gentle, any trace of anger long gone at the sight of his lover’s tears, and Ether found his hand clutching to front of the rogue’s tunic, his eyes laying shut as he inhaled Dey’s scent; cologne and deep forest after rain. It was his favorite smell in the entire world, and sometimes when Dey was gone, he’d sneak in his drawers and smell the cologne for reassurance if he felt lonely. Without further words, Dey took Ether’s left hand in his, lips laying a soft kiss against the simple gold band that he had given the small elf during their exchange of vows, and though the ceremony of two hearts had not been traditional, Ether would not have wanted it any other way. 

“D-Dey, Ether did not understand...” 

“I know..” 

Ether’s ears laid flat submissively to his mate, and the rogue seemed to have his gaze locked onto him as much as Ether wanted to lower it, he found he couldn’t. The rogue sighed very softly, giving his head a tiny shake as he studied Ether’s face.

“Ether. I know you do not understand some things, and I know we fight sometimes because of it, but Dey should have understood that was why you were angry. I know you are trying, so hard. I’m so proud, Ether, so proud of you. I’ve been chasing you all night, I couldn’t keep up, and Ether...” 

The rogue closed his eyes for a moment before speaking again, an expected emotion playing in his eyes now, one so vivid it made Ether take a breath, his lover’s next words startling him a bit.

“Ether, I get scared. When I can’t find you, it scares me. I think, “What if he’s tired of trying to be understood?”, or, “Why can’t you just stop being so stupid Dey? He’s clearly frustrated..”, and it scares me to death when you run off like that after a fight. Ether, couples fight, but you can’t run away from me. I need you just as much as you need me Ether, and we can do this...but we must do it together. Cause our souls? I think they are meant to be together, no...I know they are, because no matter how far you run, or how lost you feel....Dey always finds you, doesn’t he? It’s like an invisible line; leading from you to me. I just follow it...”

“Take his hand, Etta...” Rai’jin’s words echoed, “..and don’t let go.” 

“I’m sorry, Dey...” 

Ether wrapped his fingers around Dey’s, the rogue immediately giving their joined hands a firm, yet reassuring, squeeze, another slight shake to his head as his dark hair fell over his shoulders.

“Ether, don’t be sorry. Just come to Dey when you don’t understand, he will show you the way. It’s always been that way, and it always will be. Help Dey understand, and he will help you. Ether, you aren’t alone, I would never allow it. Never...” 

Dey lowered his head, as if asking permission before it swooped down and caught Ether’s lips, but the hexxer was already on his tippy toes and eagerly awaiting the relief that came with Dey’s kiss. As his husband’s arms embraced him, he felt safe again, his body no longer shaking, and he knew it that moment every would be okay - as long as he had his Dey. 

No matter how many times they fought, they’d always seal their apologies to each other with a kiss, and everything would work itself out in the end.

Because even when he did not understand, Dey did. 

Dey understood Ether himself, for himself, as he was. Nothing less, and the rogue was in awe of him as much as Ether was in awe of him; they admired each other’s strengths and filled in each other’s weaknesses. 

It was balance at it’s finest, and with a sweeping motion of his arms, Ether was bridal style within the smiling rogue’s grasp, another soft kiss laid to his lips as he carted the runaway hexxer back to camp, Ether’s violet eyes closing as his head fell lax against the sound of his husband’s heart, knowing as long as Dey was around...

He’d never be alone.

[naireides]

do u think Raven (in the shower biz fic),once she saw Clarke stroll towards the shower w Bellamy in it, that she opened up the groupchat: Raven-it's happened!!- Raven-i'm @ bellamy n clarkes apt & theyre literally showering together!!!!!!!111!!!!!- Raven-who bet on 4 months- Jasper-IUFESJDKXNOUJFKXVCIHOFDLB- Jasper-FINALLY- Miller-yea that was me pay up *sunglasses emoji*-

this?? turned?? into?? a fic?? wow okay

wc: 2 458part 1 | read on ao3

Saturday, 8: 53 a.m.Mom and Dad aren’t home

Raven: i don’t mean to alarm anybody but i think bellamy and clarke are datingRaven: or at least having sex

Harper: [click to view image]

Murphy: you can’t say that and then not expect us to be alarmed reyesMurphy: some of us have money riding on this shit

Monty: pics or it didn’t happen

Jasper: FWEJFCERGBUJJFJEFSJasper: [click to view image]

Miller: Jasper if you don’t stop fucking screaming i’m coming over there and choking you

Jasper: ooh kinky ;) ;)

Monty: excuse you, i’m the only one allowed to flirt with miller here

Raven: yeah jasper, keep your kinks to yourselfRaven: this is me kinkshaming youRaven: ARE YOU KINKSHAMED

Jasper: jokes on you kinkshaming is my kink

Monty: how much kink could a kinkshame shame if a kinkshame could shame kink

Miller: i will murder all of you is2g

Raven: we already have one psychopath in this groupchat miller we don’t need another one

Murphy: fuck you reyes

Harper: she didn’t say it was you murphyHarper: … but we all know it’s you

Miller: could you fucks keep it down some of us are trying to sleepMiller: also i bet on them lasting four months living together pay up

Raven: um we don’t know how long they’ve been together

Miller: you’re just bitter that you lost

Monty: she has a point tho

Miller: wtf you’re supposed to be on MY SIDE

Monty: i’m on the side of justiceMonty: …… and also because i bet that they would have gotten together in september

Murphy: you put way too much trust in blake tbh

Jasper: what exactly happened raven? did you walk in on bellamy scrambling clarke’s eggs ;) ;)

Monty: dude no one even knows what that means

Harper: and no one wants to know either

Raven: clarke and i were supposed to go shopping todayRaven: and she oversleptRaven: so she let me in to wait while she got readyRaven: and then bellamy walks in from his run because he’s a gross fitness junkie

Murphy: you’re a gross fitness junkie too

Raven: quiet jonathanRaven: so here i am at bellamy and clarke’s apartment and she literally followed him into the showerRaven: !!!!!

Monty: OMG

Jasper: he could be scrambling her eggs in the shower

Murphy: i gotta give blake some credit, that didn’t take as long as i thought he would

Miller: you bet that they’d get together in june. 2023Miller: THAT’S IN SIX YEARS

Murphy: yeah because blake would rather make moon eyes across the couch at her than make a moveMurphy: he’s a pussy

Harper: hEY

Raven: WATCH YOUR DAMN MOUTH

Miller: SIX YEARS

Monty: STOP THE YELLING

Jasper: STOP THE MADNESS

Harper: so we don’t really know for sure how long they’ve been a thing

Raven: nopeRaven: but i’ll ask clarke about it laterRaven: miller, murphy, one of you ask bellamy

Murphy: no thanks

Miller: i rather not

Raven: … Raven: pussies.

Murphy: OH so she can say it but i can’t

Raven: shut up murphy

-

Saturday, 10: 04 a.m.Bellamy Blake

Miller: soMiller: how’s clarke doin?

Bellamy: ??Bellamy: uh fine?Bellamy: she’s out with raven rn

Miller: anything… special planned for later?

Bellamy: noBellamy: why

Miller: you knowMiller: it’s saturdayMiller: good date night

Bellamy: rightBellamy: shouldn’t you be telling monty this

Miller: you’re impossible

Bellamy: how am i impossible? You’re the one making no sense!

Miller: so you’re not doing anything tonight. or doing clarke tonight.Miller: … Miller: i meant doing anything *WITH clarke tonight fucking autocorrect

Bellamy: i mean we might watch a movie or something but i don’t think soBellamy: monty ditch you for his nerd friends tonight so you wanna cry on my shoulder huh

Miller: fuck you blake

-

Saturday, 10: 28 a.m.Bellamy Blake

Murphy: u fucking clarke yet

Bellamy: what the fuck NO

Murphy: bummerMurphy: u should get on that thoMurphy: or under thatMurphy: or behind that

Bellamy: i will BLOCK you

-

Saturday, 10: 47 a.m.Clarke Griffin

Clarke: raven is acting super weird

Bellamy: raven is always weird

Clarke: well yeahClarke: but weirder than normalClarke: you know what i mean

Bellamy: no yeah i get youBellamy: miller and murphy are weird too

Clarke: come on MURPHY is always weirdClarke: like i wouldn’t be surprised if he sells organs on the black market or something

Bellamy: he’s a chef princess

Clarke: EXACTLYClarke: that means he knows where to stab you

Bellamy: goodbye clarke

Clarke: yeah yeah go back to jacking off to npr sorry i disturbed you

Bellamy: fuck you griffin

Clarke: maybe later honey i’m not in the mood for phone sex

Bellamy: GOODBYE CLARKE

-

Saturday, 11: 38 a.m.Mom and Dad aren’t home

Raven: OH MY GODRaven: i hate themRaven: bellamy and clarke are IDIOTS

Monty: ??????????

Harper: what happened

Miller: i don’t think they’re dating

Murphy: i asked and he said they’re definitely not fucking

Jasper: BUT THEY SHOWERED TOGETHER RAVEN SAW IT HAPPEN

Raven: THEY DO SHOWER TOGETHER IT’S RIDICULOUS I HATE THEM

Monty: raven WHAT HAPPENED

Raven: so i asked clarke about the shower thing that i saw this morningRaven: and like. she doesn’t deny showering with bellamyRaven: actually it seems like they do it pretty fucking oftenRaven: but it’s all PLATONICRaven: P L A T O N I C   S H O W E R   S H A R I N G

Harper: i think raven’s brain just broke

Miller: who the fuck even does that

Monty: bellamy and clarke apparently

Murphy: lmao i told you blake has no gameMurphy: he’s naked in a 6x4 bathroom with the girl he has a crush on- who is ALSO NAKED- and he doesn’t do anything about itMurphy: i’m still amazed that he used to have threesomes in college

Jasper: bellamy used to have threesomes in college???Jasper: our bellamy??Jasper: HE ALMOST CRASHED INTO A STOP SIGN BECAUSE CLARKE SMILED AT HIM THAT ONE TIME

Harper: jesus fucking christ they’re disasters

Raven: jasper, come over at my place later they only way i can deal with this is with weed

Jasper: ayyyyy i like how you thinkin

-

Saturday, 10: 52 p.m.Bellamy Blake

Clarke: i still maintain that showering together can be totally platonic

Bellamy: what we just did certainly was not platonic

Clarke: yeah but we didn’t actually fuck in the showerClarke: so it’s still platonicClarke: i’m not fucking you in the shower btw

Bellamy: is this out of sheer spite to keep it platonic

Clarke: no it’s because i work in a hospital and i’ve seen more than my fair share of broken dicks because of shower sex

Bellamy: you work in a CLINIC

Clarke: still seen broken dicks thoClarke: i don’t want you to break your dickClarke: i like your dickClarke: and the rest of youClarke: you’re great bell

Bellamy: that was weirdly sweetBellamy: i like you tooBellamy: it’s kind of why we’re in a relationship

Clarke: we’ve only been in this relationship for like 4 hoursClarke: and you didn’t even ASK me to be your girlfriendClarke: you just fucked me like i was some two bit hussy

Bellamy: princess will you go out with me

Clarke: good boy you learn quick

Bellamy: that’s not an answer it’s a yes or no question clarke

Clarke: yes

Bellamy: good. now put down your phone and go to sleep

Clarke: orrrrr we could have phone sex ;) ;)

Bellamy: clarke you are literally right down the hall from me

Clarke: heyClarke: hey bellClarke: i’m not wearing any panties

Bellamy: jesusBellamy: you do realise i asked you to stay in my bed with me and you said no right?

Clarke: yeah because my bed is comfortableClarke: altho i bet it would be more comfortable with you in it ;) ;) ;)

Bellamy: you are a frat boy in the body of a 27 year old woman

Clarke: you’re one to talk i just heard your door open

Bellamy: … semantics

Clarke: i lured you into my bed with my feminine wiles didn’t i?Clarke: i really am a two bit hussy

Bellamy: yeah yeah i’m coming

Clarke: you’re not the only one who’s gonna be coming ;) ;)

-

Monday, 9: 14 a.m.Princess

Clarke: sorry to text you at work but do you think we could keep this quiet for a little while?Clarke: i forgot to ask yesterday because SOMEONE spent the whole day eating me out

Bellamy: it wasn’t the whole dayBellamy: more like 4 hoursBellamy: and yeah, of course princess

Clarke: good, thanks bell Clarke: i just can’t handle seeing her smug little face

Bellamy: yeah i get itBellamy: same with me and miller. and murphy too tbh

Clarke: so it’s a secret?

Bellamy: i guess so

Clarke: coolClarke: that’s kinda hotClarke: *moon face emoji*

Bellamy: I’M AT SCHOOL CLARKE I’M NOT GONNA SEXT YOU AT SCHOOL

Clarke: fine be boring

Bellamy: i’ll make it up to you later ;)

-

Friday, 6: 13 p.m.Mom and Dad aren’t home

Miller: god i can’t believe they’re still not togetherMiller: i went to pick up blake for a boys night and caught them taking ANOTHER shower togetherMiller: SCHOOL’S CLOSED FOR WINTER BREAK WHY DO THEY KEEP DOING THIS

Jasper: we really should stage an interventionJasper: monty is good at powerpoint presentations

Monty: i am good at powerpoint presentations yes

Raven: ‘10 reasons why platonic shower sharing ISN’T A THING’

Harper: nah i think that’s too long for a title

Murphy: ‘Get Married Already’

Monty: concise, but a little too on the nose

Miller: ugh he’s changed his contact name for her to ‘princess’ with a heart emoji i’m gonna throw up

Harper: ‘oh bellamy? he’s just a friend. such a good friend.’

Jasper: cLaRkE aNd I aRe pLaToNiCJasper: [click to view image]

Raven: i really really hate them

-

Friday, 6: 14 p.m.Bell

Bellamy: come on this isn’t fair princessBellamy: i just left the house

Clarke: and??

Bellamy: give a guy some warningBellamy: miller almost saw that picture you sent meBellamy: no nudes out of the blue like that

Clarke: you really are an 80 year old man aren’t you

Bellamy: you weren’t saying that last night

Clarke: touche

-

Tuesday, 7: 19 p.m.Mom and Dad aren’t home

Harper: should i go all out with the mistletoeHarper: maybe we could trap them underneath it

Raven: lbr, bellamy and clarke would call it ‘platonic kissing’

Harper: oh shit u rite

Monty: ‘only real friends shove their tongues into each other’s mouths’

Miller: i say go for it if it can work in the rom coms then it can work hereMiller: these two are probably almost as ridiculous as a rom comMiller: maybe even more

Jasper: you watch rom coms miller?

Miller: … new phone who dis

-

Wednesday, 4: 32 p.m.Bellamy Blake

Raven: tell your wife that she’s on cookie decorating duty for christmas dinnerRaven: we meet at harper’s on sunday to begin

Bellamy: cute reyesBellamy: and you know that CLARKE has her own phone right

Raven: yeah, but i’m willing to bet real money that she’s sitting right next to you

Bellamy: no comment

Raven: yeah that’s what i thoughtRaven: i guess because you two are joined at the hip that means you have to shower together huh

Bellamy: for the love of god IT SAVES TIME

Raven: YOU 2 ARE WEIRDOS

-

Sunday, 9: 12 p.m.Clarke Griffin

Raven: hey i think you left your scarf in my carRaven: i’m only like a block away i’ll come back and drop it offRaven: it has frosting on it i’m not keeping this shitRaven: be there in like 10

-

Sunday, 9: 21 p.m.Mom and Dad aren’t home

Raven: OH YM GODRaven: YOU G UYSRaven: FCUK YOU;LL NEVR GUESS WAHT HAPPEND

Murphy: you turned off auto correct?

Raven: i’m going to ignore thatRaven: because CLARKE AND BELLAMY ARE FUCKINGRaven: FOR REAL THIS TIMERaven: IN THE FCKIGN SHOWER AGAIN

Jasper: what

Monty: are you sure??

Harper: how do you know

Miller: jfc

Jasper: WHAT

Raven: i dropped clarke home a little while ago and made it like a block before i realised that she left her scarf in my carRaven: so i went back to the apartment and it was empty BUT I COULD HEAR THEMRaven: MY POOR EARS

Murphy: didn’t you fuck blake a few years ago

Raven: yeah but that was before we were FRIENDSRaven: I DON’T NEED TO HEAR CLARKE BEGGING FOR BELLAMY TO GIVE IT TO HER HARDER

Jasper: IS THIS THE REAL LIFE

Monty: OR IS THIS JUST FANTASY

Raven: or trust me, it’s real and i’m SCARRED FOR LIFE

Harper: you mean they hid their relationship from us??

Miller: either that or they both have a huge shower kink

Harper: why would they hide their relationship from us??

Raven: idk BUT I’M GONNA YELL AT THEMRaven: … right after i figure out how to unhear things

-

Sunday, 9: 33 p.mRaven Reyes created a new groupchat: BETRAYAL

Raven added Bellamy Blake to the chat

Raven added Clarke Griffin to the chat

Raven: DECEPTIONRaven: DISGRACERaven: AN OUTRAGE! FOR SHAME!

Clarke: surprise?

Raven: I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU HID THIS FROM USRaven: I THOUGHT WE WERE FRIENDS

Bellamy: i mean, i don’t really like you that much

Raven: shove it blake

Clarke: we just wanted to keep it to ourselves for a little while

Raven: and how long is a little while hmm

Bellamy: roughly 2 months give or take

Raven: i can’t believe itRaven: TWO MONTHSRaven: you 2 ruined christmas i hope you’re happyRaven: you are UNINVITED from tomorrow’s festivities

Raven Reyes has left the chat

Bellamy: godBellamy: are all of our friends this ridiculous?

Clarke: i’m 90% sure they had bets about usClarke: so yes

Bellamy: whatever who needs friends on christmasBellamy: we have cold turkey in the fridge and some potatoes we’re good to go

Clarke: and me of course

Bellamy: you?Bellamy: oh lemme guess, for dessert

Clarke: actually no i meant you have me, your girlfriend, so you don’t need anyone elseClarke: but i like yours betterClarke: *moon face emoji*

Bellamy: of course you do

Clarke: you love it

Bellamy: i love YOU

Clarke: Clarke: i love you too bell

[an-anaemic-pen]

Project Phoenix Chapter 13

The Week Without A God of Mischief

The Manifestation || The Power Play || The Green-Eyed Fly || The Middle of The Night || The Alternative || The Attic || The House || The God of Mischief || The Kill || The Night || The Collar || The Training

Summary: Kate’s a normal teenage Midgardian girl; except there’s a Loki in her attic, and now S.H.I.E.L.D.’s after her, and also, she has powers. Apparently, she’s meant to save the world.

She just wanted to finish school and maybe fall in love—at least she’s accomplishing one of those.

Relationships: Gen, F/M (Loki/Original Female Character)

Rating: M (Graphic Depictions of Violence, Underage if you squint bit—nothing occurs while characters are underage, Sexual Content)

Mood: My Freedom, Miracles

SUNDAY, JUNE 10TH

Today was... *interesting.* Church was normal, singing, a sermon, then I sat in the car for a little while—the usual. Except, Loki (I think he might just be who he says he is), decided to tag along. He put, I’ll be totally honest, a collar on me. Yes, a collar (I’m underlining cause it’s just that dang important).

I pretended to lose my voice—it’s ironic that I was lying to people at church—so I didn’t have to talk or sing to people. I did that because Loki decided it would be hilarious to make the collar shock me whenever I spoke. He showed me more mind tricks today and also thought it would be hilarious to sit on my lap. Might I mention how heavy Asgardian/Frost Giants are? Like *dang,* they’re HEAVY. It's probably some sort of cell density thingy that I'm too lazy to think of at the moment. I can't ask him about it either, because he left while I was sleeping like some sort of thief in the night.

Anyway, he sat in my lap and wouldn’t get himself off, even after he actually broke my legs, until I somehow cast a spell or something. Thankfully, he fixed my legs.

Turns out I have powers. I mean, cool cool and all, but then he just ghosted me. He showed me how to use my apparent ice powers, but I can’t do it without him helping me with *his* powers. His magic feels weird, and I’ll leave it at that because the rest of the sentence I was about to write sounded wrong.

I’m still mad he actually killed a dude over me, but my heart rate has stopped spiking when my phone goes off, so that’s good. I don’t think I forgot anything else, so I’ll leave it there.

MONDAY, JUNE 11TH

The countdown until the last day of school is so aggravating. I swear, sophomore-itis is a thing. A couple of my teachers are just letting us chill out as long as we’re quiet while Mr. Machley is doing everything in his power to squeeze the life out our few surviving brain cells.

I had a dream about Loki last night. He was the weird-real Loki from mythology. Which, lemme say, that’s a religious breakdown. I spent most of 3rd period staring out the window at the rain and figuring that out. I won’t go into detail because this journal’s on its last page and I don’t think I have enough space, but long-story-short, internal screaming.

Anyway, I’m pretty sure the dream was the memory he showed me. Except, I was in my point of view. I’m not sure whether that’s dormant memories waking up or something, or just my brain being too uncreative to think of something original—most likely the latter.

Leanna said she’s gonna be coming back from Virginia soon, so we’ll get to hang out with her for a little while before she starts the fall semester. I can’t believe she’s already a junior and she’s got a boyfriend who’s pretty serious, too. I may-or-may-not ship them a little too hard. From what she’s told me, he’s great.

I’m not sure whether or not I’m gonna at least allude to Loki or not in conversation. He said he was gonna be back on Saturday, so I’m half counting the days down, half dreading it. He’s a piece of work and he’s got the upper hand with the stupid collar trick-thingy. Either way, Leanna would be a huge help with figuring out my Norse god problem, but, ya know, *Norse god.* That doesn’t exactly sit in reality.

TUESDAY, JUNE 12TH

Ayyyyy, new journal!

Also, proof Mr. Machley is trying to murder us via stress-induced brain aneurysms: the man gave us an “extra credit” assignment that was an essay, so I had to stay up after I got home from work and do that. I had to stay pretty late at the salon because someone came in late, too, so it’s currently the “wee hours of the morning” now and I’m up on caffeine and stress. While I was working, Max came to me with another nightmare. He hasn’t needed someone to comfort him from a nightmare in months, now twice in less than a week. I’d be a little worried if it wasn’t normal for 8-year-olds.

I’ve been trying to get these powers of my mine to work since Loki left the barrier-thingy up. So far, nothing, so that’s slightly annoying. Jake’s been curling up closer to me, which is nice. Oh, on the topic of powers:

My hair is changing color.

That’s unnerving. I noticed a nice, solid, paper-thin line of my roots growing in stark white. I don’t know what I’m going to do with that, probably try to hide it with an enchantment, because I can do Jedi mind tricks without Loki here.

WEDNESDAY, JUNE 13TH

So, I tried to fix my hair.

Long-story-short, it didn’t work, and now all my hair is white.

Loki’s gonna kill me.

I was able to lie my way out of it by saying I’d gotten it done at the salon after my shift (thank the Lord Almighty I worked yesterday) and paid for it out of my paycheck, which I also happened to get that night.

Besides that, today was the second-to-last day of school. Calvin decided he was going to ask me out during 3rd period, so he did. If I didn’t have a God of Mischief most likely watching over my every move and probably planning to claim me as his wife once I turn 18, I’d be chill.

But, ya know, I *do* have a God of Mischief most likely watching over my every move and probably planning to claim me as his wife once I turn 18. Holy crap that’s something to digest.

THURSDAY, JUNE 14TH

Hallelujia, I’m officially a rising junior! I also told Calvin I’m on the fence about going on a date. Hopefully, that’ll be enough to hold the dude off. He gave me his number and told me to text him when I make my decision. Most classes either let us hang out or had a movie on. Mr. Machley had us hand in the essay. He apparently changed his mind and it was a required assignment, and he apparently sent out an email about it (no, he didn’t), so thank God I did it.

School let out early, so I got home before lunch and passed out on the couch for a few hours. Napping is wonderful.

Also, I started working out. Might I say, running a mile is tiring? I’m pretty sure I sweat out most of my body’s water weight—not that I have all that much, I don’t really drink enough water.

Max had another nightmare. At some point, he snuck in my room. I found him curled up with Jake at my feet. Either the kid’s a ninja, or I was just *sound* asleep.

We had the neighbors over for a celebratory dinner, so I got to know the daughter, Sarah, a bit better. She’s really nice, although isn’t everyone when you invite them over for dinner? She really liked my hair and ended up doing a really intricate design that I still have up. It’s like braids, but also twists and she somehow got a few dandelions from outside weaved in. I wonder if Loki sees women with hair like this?

It’s a little longer than before I *enchanted* it, and so far, nobody has noticed the giant chunks of hair in my bedroom trashcan (they’re well-covered by crumpled paper and tissues). I’d imagine it’s about the same length as Asgardian women’s if what survives of Viking culture on the internet is anything to go off of.

FRIDAY, JUNE 15TH

I didn’t really do all that much today. Max and I played more LEGO Star Wars and then I fell asleep with Mars on my chest. I actually wanted to get up, but she was so adorable I couldn’t, so I just fell asleep instead.

Running is getting a little easier. My legs still feel a little weak, but I’ll adjust.

I haven’t tried any magic since my last attempt, which is probably for the best. All I’ve done so far was test my limits on how far I can cast my mind. When sitting out in the backyard, I can feel most of it. Around the fenceline is a little fuzzy, but I can feel all the bugs and little critters in the trees.

They all have varying minds. When I cough, I could feel a primal spike of fear in the birds, but the bees don’t seem to care about my existence. Hopefully, I can get over my fear of them knowing this. I might go to the zoo at some point soon. It would be so cool feeling all the animals around me.The Manifestation || The Power Play || The Green-Eyed Fly || The Middle of The Night || The Alternative || The Attic || The House || The God of Mischief || The Kill  || The Night || The Collar || The TrainingThe Manifestation || The Power Play || The Green-Eyed Fly || The Middle of The Night || The Alternative || The Attic || The House || The God of Mischief || The Kill  || The Night || The Collar || The Training