#also the support on my latest fic has been so NICE i’m happy people love it 🥹

[crosshairlovebot]

omg thank you sm for 100 followers!!!!

i’m just having fun on here, reblogging things and writing my silly little fics bc i love crosshair so thanks for supporting my writing 🫶🏻🫶🏻

should i do a little celebration??? do some drabble requests for the batch??? 🤔🤔

[runnning-outof-time]

• K’s ‘Halfway to 2K’ Celebration •

Thank you so very much for 1.5K Followers!

I never thought that when I started writing again that this blog would become so big, and that my stories would be read by so many people. The amount of support that I get absolutely blows my mind each and every day that I log onto this site. I don’t think I would be writing still if y’all hadn’t been so nice to me. It really means a lot. ☺️💕

So......for my 1K follower celebration, I took on some blurb requests and tried my best for y’all. Now, for my ‘halfway to 2K’ celebration, I figured I’d ask for some of the amazing writers within the Peaky community to join in and celebrate with me.

I’ve decided to organize a little celebration that I will go into detail about below the cut, so if you’re interested, please tap/click on the ‘keep reading’ so you can learn what it’s about. I really hope that you’d want to celebrate with me!!

If you’re not interested, thank you so much, again, for following me and/or reading my stories. You are truly the reason why this blog is still alive. 🥰❤️

**For Updated Choices and Finished Creations, check this post out!

First off, thanks so much for taking interest in my celebration! It means the world to me that you’d want to join in!

So I’m gonna start off by saying that this beautiful idea comes from what Lily ( @/retromafia ) decided to do for her latest celebration. I absolutely love music, and, as I’m sure you’ve noticed, I love to base stories off of songs that I get inspired by...so when I was thinking about what to do for a celebration, my mind went to this idea almost immediately.

Listed below are a bunch of songs that I’m in love with/have been listening to a lot recently (I may have gone a bit overboard, I know). I feel like these songs would lend themselves well to writing (particularly with peaky), and I hope that you find the same.

So...if you’d still like to participate:

first off, pick a song. Then pick a character(s) you’d like to write with (it can be any character from the show — only Peaky Blinders though, please). You can use a show pairing, OC, or a reader for your story...I’m open to all ideas. If you plan to write something that’s NSFW (18+), please make sure that you put the proper warnings (and that you are 18+)! Finally: Send me a message with the song and the character you’re going to be writing with!

- Because I have so many songs listed here, I hope that you’ll be able to find one that will strike inspiration. If you absolutely, positively want to use a song of your choice, please send me a message with the title and artist first. I’d really love for you to pick one of mine, but I will be open to suggestions.

- I’ve gone back and forth between how many people can use the same song. I think that I’m going to allow two (2) people per song, but I’d hope that you might find interest in one that has no names under it first...if that makes sense. I’d like to see as many songs on the list used as possible. Also, you’re more than welcome to choose more than one song ... in fact, choose as many as you’d like!

If you’re not a fic writer, but you’d still like to participate: I’d be happy to accept moodboards or edits, or whatever else you may want to create. If this applies to you, please make sure that you send me a message letting me know what you’ll be creating and what song you’ll be using.

**You don’t have to be following me to join in on the fun — everyone’s welcome here!**

There is no deadline for these creations to be submitted by — let your creativity flow free!

Please make sure that you tag me in your work so that I can see it!

Alright...let’s get into the songs now. I’ve listed them in alphabetical order. I hope you find one that interests you! 😊

———

After A Few - Travis Denning

Afterglow - Ed Sheeran

Ain’t Nobody - Bones Owens

Better Man - 5 Seconds of Summer

Burning House - Cam

Can’t Make You Love Me - Chloe Fredericks

Corner of Your Lips - Francy & The First Time Feeling

Dance with Me - Morgan Evans & Kelsea Ballerini

Devil Is A Woman - Bishop Gunn

Don’t You Wanna Stay - Jason Aldean & Kelly Clarkson

Fallin’ All In You - Shawn Mendes

Fix A Heart - Brett Eldredge

FOR YOUR LOVE - Måneskin

Gold Rush - Taylor Swift

Hard to Love - Lee Brice

Hesitate - Jonas Brothers

Hotel California - The Eagles

I Don’t Trust Myself (With Loving You) - John Mayer

I Want More (Live at Skálholt) - KALEO

I Will Destroy the Void in You - The Glorious Sons

Lady May - Tyler Childers

Lover - Taylor Swift

Lover of Mine - 5 Seconds of Summer

Parallel Line - Keith Urban

Photograph - Def Leppard

Quietly Yours - Birdy

Reputation - Post Malone

Runaway - Maroon 5

Satelitte - Harry Styles

Shameless - Garth Brooks

Slip Away - Luke Hemmings

Starting Over - Chris Stapleton

Stay - Post Malone

Steady Heart - Kameron Marlowe

St. Patrick - PVRIS

Symptoms - Devin Dawson

The Knife or the Hatchet - Ryan Hurd

The Laws of Love and War - The Glorious Sons

The Night We Met - Lord Huron

To Be So Lonely - Harry Styles

To Hell & Back - Maren Morris

To Make You Feel My Love - Garth Brooks

Until I Found You - Stephen Sanchez

What a Time - Julia Michaels & Niall Horan

Why Can’t This Be Love? - Van Halen

Wild Eyes - The Glorious Sons

Willow - Taylor Swift

Woman - Harry Styles

Work Song - Hozier

———

Just wanted to tag some people who have been so very lovely to me throughout my time on here and who might be interesting in joining in on the celebration (no pressure though) 🥰

@zablife @holacia2 @retromafia @l1-l4 @mrsalwayswrite @mrs-gray @gretelshelby @christinasyellowflowers @look-at-the-soul @riridontneedya @theshelbyclan @mrs-shelbysolomons @sunsetmourners @gilmoreslorelai @julkaamazing @huntingingoodwill @mythos-writes @amysteryspot @peaky-cillian @pherelesytsia @madame-wilsonn @findinghisredrighthand @dearshelby @magicalxdaydream @peakyswritings @toms-cherry-trees @teenwolf-theoriginals @yummycastiel @shelbydelrey @noforkingclue @celticmelody @writeroutoftime @evita-shelby @writerliry @julyzaa @padfootdaredmetoo @gypsy-girl-08 @notyour-valentine @runesandmoons @agrayshade @amysteryspot @fallatyourfeet @anonymooseforever007 @normatural @helio-nex @priceofasapphire @anotherblinder @a-lil-bit-nuts @sympathyfortheblinderdevil @theshelbyslimited @thomasshelbydrabbles

**more lovely people tagged in the comments because Tumbr’s being funny and won’t let me tag any more blogs**

[sugareey-makes-stuff]

I had already planned to give @crazybutgood a shout-out this month because she’s an amazing person, but it also happens to be her birthday today! CBG is way better at origami than I’ll ever be, but I thought I’d give it a shot in folding some things I still know and enjoy making. Stars bring hope, and (baby) turtles link back to the nature of creation and good luck. Fortune cookies are full of fun and surprises, and a paper crane is as the “bird of happiness” that symbolises good fortune and longevity (and it’s a nod to a certain blond ;D). These are all of the qualities I see in CBG, which has made her a key person within fandom who has brought so many others together. She’s a shining star because she knows exactly how to support creators and cheer them on. Her warmth and enthusiasm make things so much brighter, and I’m sure fandom folks can agree with me that because of CBG’s support, that’s why so many awesome works exist today. She’s that fandom enthusiast and reader who makes creators go, “OMG, okay! Maybe I should be doing more of what I’m doing?!” I first saw CBG’s origami from mutuals’ reblogs, and I was blown away. How cool is it that such a beautiful craft has been integrated within fandom? Her work is unique and thoughtful. And she’s obviously damn good at folding, and that’s what makes CBG stand out. She creates origami recs, gifts and shout-outs for people because she wants to not because she has to. Seriously, her origami advent from the hols was so cool, and her author appreciation project is just as awesome and heartfelt (and there’s more to come soon for that!). I have no idea how she does all of this, since these projects are labour intensive to set up. Nevertheless, all of her origami and recs always make me smile whenever they pop up on my feed. And, this is 1000000% why CBG is truly one of a kind. As an origami artist, she has collabed with so many creators to bring some stellar works to life. Make sure to check out more of her creations and recs! She’s also an alpha AND a beta, which is not an easy job. For those who have written fics, it’s easy to let imposter syndrome take over and for the writing plan to fall to pieces. But CBG is there offering her help, cheerleading and kindness so authors can produce the best fics they can be proud of. And the fact that she’s worked with many creators in that sense and has lifted each one up says everything you need to know. She’s obviously someone who is a dream to work with. Did I mention how nice CBG is? I got to co-mod @microficmay with her, and her energy is such a breath of fresh air. She truly wants to help in any way she can and she delivers. She was a godsend during a busy May, and she deserves 8324324324 kudos for keeping things going (thank you so much for being a gem for dealing with all the reblogs at weird hours). I don’t think we expected so many microfics to come in, but hey, that’s never a bad thing. More microfics to enjoy and read! If CBG wasn’t talented enough, she makes podfics AND she writes! I’m so glad she dipped her toes in writing! We both had no idea we would be paired up for the @gameofdrarry Owlery Exchange, but here we are! XD When reveals came out right after Microfic May ended, we laughed when we found out we had been writing to each other for two months without even knowing it. I haven’t written anything for Drarry in many years, so receiving letters from CBG’s Draco and responding back as Harry was really fun. She has been a great person to collab with, and I’m so glad we hit things off (as Harry and Draco and as co-writers)! Our fic, I Just Want You to Know is currently posting up letters from now until the end of the month. Feel free to check it out and follow along for the latest updates! Here are my fav CBG fics too: 🌟 >>> Language of Love (Drarry, T, 864) Summary: “Sometimes, I wish you could understand the things I want to say to you, about you, in Hindi or Urdu.” AHHH! My heart ! <333 This is so tender and gorgeous, and I totally get this. Native languages in fics are something I absolutely adore because the words are personal. And I love how Harry is willing to teach Draco some words he knows to show that he cares. This fic shows so much in so few words! 🌟 >>> Heart on Your Sleeve (Drarry, T, 5.1k + origami) Summary: Draco’s finally returned to England after fleeing to France when he was turned into a vampire. Pansy and Blaise try to drag Draco's moping ass out of Malfoy Manor, but he’s still reluctant while doing so. Until he stumbles upon Potter’s cafe. This is soooo cute! Coffee shop AU + Vampire!Draco was something I didn’t know I needed until I read this fic. The coffee puns, the flirting, the meddling friends and the origami that goes with each part makes this fluffy fic worth the read! If you’re also looking for classic dramatic!Draco, and general banter, give this a shot! 🌟 >>> Green Heart (Drarry, G, 899 + origami) Summary: Seeing Draco’s dexterity with his hands, Draco’s father lets him pursue various Arts for him to develop his skills, including origami. Ensuring Draco strives to practice and excel, his father provides him with an endless supply of ordinary and magical papers. One special type changes colour depending on one’s mood when touched, making for an interesting folding process. A curious Draco tries it out. OKAY, this fic is precious AND clever, because Draco making origami and using it as his outlet for his worries is pretty amazing here. There’s such a beautiful narration of his years at Hogwarts, how they tie back to canon events and how he’s feeling about everything. I don’t even know what else to say, other than the execution of this was so well thought out and how cool it is that we can actually see “his” creations. Find more of CBG’s work on AO3, and give her some love for her fandom contributions! CBG, thank you so much for what you do for fandom creators. You have such a way of making each day so much better for all of us. We love you, and keeping being awesome!

[akaashisupremacy]

Brimming with Hope

Summary: Having broken off your engagement for an arranged marriage with Gojo, your relationship is in shreds. As you two give your relationship a second chance, what does hope look like to two disillusioned lovers?  

Gojo Satoru  x reader

Multi-fandom Masterlist || HQ Masterlist || Ao3 version

Genre: fluff, angst, exes to friends to lovers (wc: 1.5k)

“I don’t think they’ve fully made up their mind about me.” Gojo Satoru confesses to Nanami Kento.

In between assignments and his students, Gojo finds Nanami at Tokyo Jujutsu Tech’s grounds. They’re strolling along one of the many wooden hallways when Gojo opens up about you, his ex-fiancee and his current lover.

“What makes you say that?” Nanami rarely involved himself in other people’s romantic entanglements. Too much work really.

Gojo shrugs and sighs, “It’s like their affection is platonic. They care about me as a person, but I’m not sure if they have romantic feelings for me.”

The latest development of his relationship with you has been nothing short of daunting. Your relationship, albeit not exclusive was running past the six month mark. The longer he stayed around you the more pressure he felt. Commitment is not his thing. Dating his ex is also not his thing. But you certainly are.

“Can you blame them?” Nanami snorts, “How does it feel to be at the other end of the uncertainty?”

Gojo scowls in silence, hands pressed deep into his pocket.

“Well if they’re going out with you and stuff, then that’s not platonic.” Nanami offers. “Just make sure you’re not just fucking around again. Some people deserve better, Gojo. Leave them alone if you can’t get your shit together.”

Gojo stops walking. Nanami’s words are harsh and cold, voicing Gojo’s ultimate fear about himself.

Gojo opens his mouth and closes it shut. Nanami raises a brow. He senses some hesitation.

“Everything we do feels more intimate. I’ve been with other people, but this feels so…so….deep.” he murmurs.

Nanami turns around and snorts, “It’s the feelings. You’ve caught feelings.”

“This relationship feels so temporary...just when I feel like I’ve settled in, I’m to be up on my toes knowing this isn’t going to last. I realized they eventually want a family, but not with me. Because that’s just not me. It feels like there’s a time bomb waiting to go off.” Gojo continues, his tone silent and mournful.

More than anyone, Gojo knows you deep desire to be married and have a quiet family life. It's something he doesn't want and it pains him to know that you'll eventually go your separate ways.

Nanami breathes out, waiting for Gojo to catch up with a few long strides, “You can’t have everything.”

“I don’t need everything. Just the things that count.” Gojo replies, walking by Nanami’s side.

“Then you have to look for a happy middle, for you and for them.” Nanami shrugs.

Gojo scratches his head. What can he do?

————————————————————————————— You walk out of the morgue to leave Ieri to her work. As you step out, you come face to face with Nanami, who looks surprised that you’re here.

“Didn’t expect you to be around Ieri’s lair.” he comments.

“I didn’t expect to have a casualty either.” you shrug, waving around a file.

You hardly ever see Nanami after graduating. The school grounds were big. Your schedules never line up. Neither of you were particularly close.

He silently looks around if Ieri is behind you.

“So you and Gojo…” he trails.

You roll your eyes and cross your arms, “Not you too! You know what, instead of asking me, you should ask Gojo and his commitment issues, for updates.”

Your voice rings louder on the empty walls than you intended.

“I did.” he replies.

“And?”

“Commitment issues with a capital “C” indeed.” Nanami states, as if the fact was self-evident. What’s new? You sniff.

“It’s unusual to see him so conflicted about you. You used to be his rock.” he adds.

Your eyes narrow, as if asking for more information. You were never really sure how Gojo felt about you when you two were younger. He seemed attracted during your brief arranged engagement, but his attention obviously flitted elsewhere after that.

Nanami relents, “When we were freshmen, you reminded him of home. He pretends not to be homesick all the time. He’s not very good at hiding it when he talks about you.”

“Well, that feeling didn’t last, did it?” you murmur just loud enough for Nanami to hear.

The outside of the morgue has always been a little dark. You wished the lights were dimmer because you know Nanami is observing you.

“Not to defend him, but he was so wrapped in you and your engagement that he needed to find who he was outside of that. He likes attention, too. Can’t deny that. But his affections were sincere for a time.” he says, “I don’t know where his feelings stand right now. This isn’t to give you false hope, but he can be in love, even though it’s against his greater instincts and experience.”

He bows briefly to excuse himself. He needs to head in.

“But you already know that deep down. Out of all of us, you know him the longest, and I would argue, the best.” he adds.

You're left outside stunned by his words. Out of all his surviving friends, you assumed it was Nanami who knew him better than everyone else. It was you. You knew him best, even when Gojo wasn't by your side.

You smile a bit. There are some bonds broken romances can't break.

———————————————————— On a train home from your assignment, you find the bullet train crowded as usual. Rush hour is the bane of your existence in Tokyo.

As you try to find an empty seat, you’re surprised to find Gojo opening some sort of regional snack (again).

“How is it that you have so much time for souvenir shopping?” you groan in comment.

“It’s nice to see you, too.” he offers the seat next to his.

You plop down beside him, distracted. You think back to what Nanami said earlier. What was it that Nanami said? That you were Gojo’s rock? What did that mean really?

He tries to offer you some food. You wave him off dismissively. After gathering your thoughts, you decisively turn to him.

“I just want to know,” you swallow, “How did you feel about me when we were kids.”

With his mouth ajar, he blinks. Where was this coming from?

“Why?” he instinctively asks.

You purse your lips, “I’ve been meaning to ask for the longest while. I want to know your answer.”

He leans back into his seat and puts his food down in concentration.

“I thought I knew what love was and it came in the form of you. It’s kind of dumb. What would a teenager know about that kind of stuff?” he shrugs, “I liked the idea that you liked me. You were someone who supported me. You were there for me. You were generous with your time and affection.

“Looking back it’s just infatuation, isn’t it?" he asks rhetorically.

“You sounded naive.” you say, neither agreeing nor disagreeing.

He chuckles, “Who wouldn’t be at that age?”

“And sincere.” you followed up with a smile.

Gojo turns away from you. He sees glimpses of your early teenage years when he sees that smile. It was the smile you wore when he visited you at your clan’s home and helped out with your chores. You liked it when he would carry the firewood you gathered from the forest.

“...you made me feel so grown up, like I had my life together. Not everyone liked who they were engaged to, but I really liked you and you had believed in me so much.” he murmurs, “I felt so lucky to be able to marry you one day. I was literally brimming with hope. But that was 13 years ago.”

You both get off the train. The crowded station greets you both. Although you walk side by side, it is too easy for the crowd to sweep you away. You hold onto his sleeve. He doesn't notice.  

You try to say goodbye when you make it out, but he seems distracted. You begin to walk away.

“You’re not saying goodbye?” he asks, startled.

“I did, but you didn’t mind me.” you smirk with your arms crossed.

“Sorry. There’s a lot going on in my mind.” he nods, walking up beside you.

He leans in to plant a kiss on your cheek. You pull away.

“We’re in public,” you remind him. Gojo isn’t public with you on anything.

He kisses you anyway, pressing his lips on your cheek. You’re surprised but not unpleasantly so. His kiss is long and lingering. You embrace him with your arms around his waist. You briefly close your eyes to drown out the noise of the station.

Gojo can feel his heart racing a thousand kilometers per second. His shoulders relax. It's strangely freeing to be able to kiss you in public.

He knows he’s not into commitment, but whenever he sees you, he questions myself.

“I have to go now.” you bid softly.

I love you. He holds back. He waves carefully to not let his words escape his mouth. He’s not fifteen anymore. He should know better.

Gojo begins walking back to Jujutsu Tech. Being able to kiss you goodbye made him feel so grown up, like he has his life together more than he actually does. It makes him feel, once again, that he is brimming with hope.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I wrote this as a follow up for another Gojo x reader fic who used to be engaged. Check out the other parts!

Part 1 || Part 2 || Part 3 || Part 4 || Part 5 || Part 6 || Part 7 || Part 8

Comment or message to be added to the taglist! Or write down some comments about your feelsssss

Series Taglist: @tokyo-love-hotel@samkysnks@herownescape@cherrianne192@shamelessdonutsludgebanana@kageyamakock@shirostrbl@luvang3l@cloudsinthecosmos@httpjungoo @saturnki  @itstheee-ha-chan@gucci-froggy @soy1melk @dora-the-grownup @cherryonigiri @fiona782

If you’d like to continue being part of my taglist (JJK or Haikyuu), please let me know! I also write oneshots for both fandoms and soon I’ll be doing BSD too!

[arvinsescape]

Great! So uh, i really liked your going public fic so i thought, could you write something about tom and the reader doing a livestream together for the first time? Like the fans see them being cute together for the first time and freak out? Thanks!!

So glad you enjoyed going public! This is the first request that I’ve done so I hope you enjoy it! Also sorry but it’s pretty cheesy! Thanks for sending in your request!!

You were incredibly nervous, although you’d appeared in the background of a few of Tom’s livestreams you’d never actually done one together. Tom had thought that it would be a good idea, said it would be a great way for the fans to get to know you better. He’d done a lot to help calm your nerves but as soon as you’d started the livestream you could feel your heart in your throat.

“That’s a lot of people that are joining and so fast!” You said eyes wide as you swallowed thickly. Tom noticed your nervousness and instantly placed him hand on your thigh to comfort you.

“Yeah, a lot of people usually watch these.” He smiles at you. 

“What should you talk about? I’ve never actually done one of these.” You asked him as you watched the viewer count rise and the comments flooding in. They were moving so fast you barely had time to read what people were saying. Your eyes bulged out of your head. “Jesus Tommy, how do you keep up with this?” you asked him in disbelief. 

“Trust me, you get used to it.” He chuckled as he moved his hand from your thigh to interlock your fingers as he raised your hand to kiss the back of it, your nerves slowly easing. “Just a reminder to everyone that it watching to please be kind.” He suddenly announced as he looked at the camera, voice a little more stern than most would be used to.

Your eyes became glued to the comments section, most fans were being really kind, seemingly excited to see your presence on your boyfriends livestream, this made you feel much better.

Did you see him kiss her hand? Adorable. He looks so happy.

She called him Tommy!! I can’t with these two, so freaking cute!

You smiled as you read the comments, waiting until you saw a question whilst Tom talked about his latest ventures. It took a while for the questions to start rolling in so you decided to answer a couple.

How do you cope when Tom goes away Y/N? I would just want to be with him all the time!! 

You laughed a little as you read the question, deciding you’d give it an answer.

“Yeah, I miss him loads when he’s gone, but you know we face time and call each other, try to get to see each other as often as possible. I think it’s great that he gets to live his dream so I can’t help but be super supportive whenever he has a new project on.I’m just super proud of him.” You gushed as your answered the question, the answer sending the comments section into overdrive.

She’s so supportive! How can you not love her? She’s so sweet!!

“Aww, thank you darling. I always miss you the most when i’m away.” He said as he kissed your cheek, you blushed as you smiled.

“You can be so cheesy Thomas.” You teased him as you poked his side.

“Says you.” He teased back. Your eyes flicking back to the comments section.

Oh my- my heart is going to explode from how cute they are. 

He just loves her so much, you can tell!

You continued to answer a few more questions as the fans gushed over the two of you. Tom answering a few questions here and there but he mostly let you interact with his fans, heart filling with pride at how well you doing, considering how nervous you’d been earlier.

“Okay guys! I’m actually starting to feel a nap coming on so I think we’ll answer one more question!” Tom announced.

“You should be payed for napping.” You teased him as he laughed.

Tom, how much do you love Y/N? Like is she your person? The question caught both your attention. You’d been with Tom for a while, over 2 years. You’d been pretty private about your relationship. Some people had said that they were surprised you’d only just done a livestream together but Tom had wanted to protect you from any amount of hate for as long as possible and only did things regarding your relationship when he felt the timing was right. You’d of course discussed a future together, you loved him with all your heart and he gave you no reason to doubt he felt the same.

“I love Y/N more than anything honestly. She’s possibly one of the best things that’s happened to me.” You’d turned to look at him at this point, stomach filling with butterflies as he spoke. “I absolutely believe that she is my person. I definitely see a long future with her.” He turned to face you now, smiling bigger than the chesire cat. He leaned forward and connected your lips, murmuring an ‘I love you’ against them.

“I love you too Tommy.” You beamed at him. As Tom started to say his goodbyes, your eyes once again made their way into the comments section.

THE WAY HE LOOKS AT HER. I CAN’T-

Get you a man that looks at you the way Tom looks at Y/N.

I don’t know who’s more lucky... Tom or Y/N.

I think i’ve changed my mind. I wanna date Y/N, she seems amazing.

THAT KISS THOUGH!

You were overwhelmed with the amount of love and support for your relationship. You chuckled at a few of the comments before you said a goodbye and Tom turned his laptop off.

“Well that went well, see I told you that you had nothing to worry about darling.” He said as you cuddled into his side.

“Yeah, the fans are really nice. I enjoyed that.” You said as you started to feel how tired you were. A nap seemingly like the best idea right now. Tom kissed the crown of your head as he laid his cheek against it, pulling you further into his side as you got more comfortable, the both of you falling into a peaceful sleep.

[whereisten]

True Love

A Jeno fic that’s a part of our Halloween Series!

Summary: You, an employee at an entertainment company, are immune to the charms of their biggest star Lee Jeno.

Pairing: Rockstar! Jeno x female reader

Genre: romance, drama, fantasy, suspense

Warning: alcohol use, smut mention, stalking, manipulation 

Word Count: 4.3k

(A/N: Hiya! I’m so sorry for the delay! It’s been so hectic lol! Thank you so much for your support and patience! Hope you enjoy! And shoutout to Krys for keeping me sane and for all of her love and support. I love you! :D)

___

To everyone in the world, Lee Jeno was the epitome of perfection and rock royalty. He was a gifted musician from the very young age of five, having specialized in several instruments in his childhood. However, his heart gravitated to the guitar. He became a trainee at LCF Entertainment and along with four other trainees, they became the world famous rock band, Temptation.

He was ranked in the top 23 in World Magazine’s Sexiest Men Alive this year. He was a walking and talking Adonis with a heartwarming smile.

Jeno was a man of many talents but he certainly didn’t let it get to his head. He was a humanitarian, a UNICEF ambassador, fostered shelter animals, was the proud owner of three cats even though he was allergic, a great family man (funding his siblings’ college tuition and providing for his parents so they could retire early), etc. He did it all and he had it all.

How could anyone be immune to his charms?

People wondered who would be the queen that would reign beside him when he settled down. Frankly, one couldn’t be anything short of a supermodel on the verge of sainthood. So many hopeful contenders were discouraged from pursuing him.

Jeno’s dating life was non-existent, the paparazzi dreaded to inform.

But you were an employee of LCF Entertainment so you knew the truth, as well as the true nature of the famous Lee Jeno. He was basically like any other young man with an inflated ego. He was cocky, a huge flirt when the cameras were off, very picky, and demanding. But no one ever dared speak a word of his true nature to the paparazzi. And you always wondered why. Someone had to bring him down a few pegs.

You were the staff photographer and videographer, in charge of capturing Jeno’s good and “relatable but still unbelievably glamorous” sides. When the camera was on, that was when you felt at ease.

It didn’t help that Jeno liked you either. Although you’d been working with Temptation and the individual members for a few years now, it was only recently that Jeno really was set on it pursuing you.

When you switched off the camera after the recording of Jeno’s backstage vlog, he sat comfortably at his makeup chair and proceeded to ask, “Y/n, will you go out with me now?”

You answered immediately, “No.”

Jeno gave you a sad puppy dog face. “Why not?”

“We’ve gone over this. I would get fired.” You wanted to spare his feelings so that was what you always said when he asked you out.

Jeno groaned. “You would not. I wouldn’t let that happen.”

You snorted. “You think you have that kind of power, Lee?”

He liked when you called him by his last name. “That’s because I do have that power, y/n. The new company building is funded solely out of my earnings from my last solo album.”

You whistled. “There’s that humility I’m always reading about in O!What Magazine…”

Jeno smiled. “You read articles about me?”

“I do when my name is in the article, boss.” You started packing up your equipment, ready to call it a day and head home.

Jeno got out of his chair and stood over you. He smelled of Dior Sauvage, cologne from his latest brand endorsement. He wore his stage clothes from his solo concert rehearsal. A sleeveless jean jacket top that parted down the middle to show his abs. Along his abs, silver chains dangled and added a nice glimmer effect when he was on stage. The entire team was thrilled to see how the audience would eat it up.

He whispered into your ear, “Y/n.”

Truthfully? He was attractive. You’d always had a little crush on him but it was of a shallow nature. You liked him for his looks. Not so much for his personality. You’d known too much.

If Jeno had been any other regular guy, you would’ve been open to a one-night stand.

But Jeno wasn’t just any regular guy.

You tried to hide the fact that shivers ran down your spine. “Stop.”

He chuckled. “But I can see you through the reflection, y/n...You're crossing your legs…”

You’d hoped he wasn’t that perceptive but it turned out he was. You hid away the fact that you were turned on. Your panties were damp but you’d be damned if he ever knew that.

You met Jeno’s perfectly lined eyes as he looked at you unapologetically. Everyone else from the staff already left. Jeno’s manager was waiting downstairs to take him to the radio station J-423 for his upcoming interview.

You were breathless now. “Jeno, you’re going to be late-”

He pulled you into him and kissed you, easily slipping his tongue into your mouth and working magic against yours. You couldn’t help but return his kiss. His mouth was paradise and you wondered what else he could do with it.

He let you go after a few minutes and cupped your face. “So are you going to deny that there’s something going on here?”

You tried to catch your breath as you wiped your lipstick off of Jeno’s mouth. “No, I guess not...But this is where it stops.”

Jeno frowned. “Y/n…”

“I know where I stand. And you know it, too. And Jeno, I don’t like you that way...I’m sorry.” You caressed his face and grabbed your things, leaving Jeno with an unreadable expression on his face.

___

As a member of LCF Entertainment, your ultimate goal was profit. That was what you had to know from the very beginning. There was no such thing as LCF Family or truly prioritizing the idols. Everyone was after themselves. Whoever brought the most money to the company would get the most attention and special treatment. And that was Jeno.

And you, an aspiring film director, were thankful to be on his team because this experience could open doors for you in the future as a director. Sure, Jeno was a diva and he couldn’t stop flirting with you, but the experience wasn’t all that bad. And yeah it was frustrating that the media and the public perceived Jeno to be the nation’s sweetheart. But in the end, he wasn’t hurting anyone.

He was only hurting people’s wallets.

Temptation’s merchandise always sold out quickly but Jeno’s individual merch was always the first to sell out. And it was the first to get resold for twice and sometimes even triple the price. The fanbase was very merciless and selfish with each other. However, the scalpers were the true evil. That was less money going to your company, after all.

Even though frontman Jeno was the most popular member of Temptation, it was Temptation’s drummer Xiaojun that you had a massive crush on for a long time now. You even accumulated a secret collection of his merch. You were two photocards away from completing your Xiaojun album photocard collection.

Xiaojun even admitted to liking you back but you both kept it a secret from everyone else in the world, especially LCF. You two weren’t about to compromise your jobs. However, since Temptation was the biggest moneymaker in the game and the boys had been with the company for quite some time now, their dating ban was lifted.

Which explained why Jeno had been asking you out all week, not caring who listened and it freaked you out.

If Jeno’s fans ever found out he asked you out, they would pin the blame on you.

A week had passed since you told Jeno you weren’t interested in him. You felt bad for hurting him but you were also worried about his mood. He had the power to get you dismissed. You refused to believe he would be so cruel.

And up until this point, you were right. You were still employed and Jeno spoke with you like any other day, talking about camera angles and new concepts for upcoming shoots.

The end of another work week and Xiaojun surprises you on your way to the bus stop.

“Y/n,” Xiaojun pulls up beside you in his Porsche. He looked so elegant in a pale blue sweater and blue jeans. His face was concealed by a mask so he could leave undetected. But you’d recognized those eyebrows anywhere.

“Hey. What are you doing here?”

“I...I think we should finally talk…”

“About?”

He smiled. “About dating.”

You nearly dropped your phone out of your hand from the shock. “Really?”

He said, “Get in so I can drive you home!”

You nodded fervently and got into his passenger seat. Was this really happening?

On the drive home, Xiaojun told you he wanted to take it slow and have indoor dates with you first. You couldn’t agree more. He even surprised you with a brand new pair of AirPods after you told him that your brother took them from you.

The first of many gifts, he told you.

You got home that night and screamed excitedly into your pillow so as not to frighten your roommates

___

It has been a month since you and Xiaojun started seeing each other. You were on cloud nine. He would visit you at your apartment and would play with his dog Bella. Bella loved you a little more than she loved Xiaojun so you two would always bicker and end the night in each other’s arms.

Jeno noticed the spring in your step as you filmed his cooking vlog. He was showing his fans how he cooked breakfast for himself when he had down time. He was in a plain white T-shirt and a pair of drawstring trousers. He looked relaxed and for many, delectable, as his hair was wet from a shower. He was trying very hard to get your attention once again.

He anticipated you averting your eyes and stuttering at the sight of him but nothing. You whistled while you adjusted the tripod’s position.

“What’s got you so happy?” Jeno asked.

You nearly jumped at his question. You decided to be upfront. “I’m seeing Xiaojun.”

Jeno’s cool facade nearly cracked before your very eyes. “Oh?”

You apologized. “I’m sorry, Jeno. I should’ve told you that I liked Xiaojun…”

Jeno was furious. What the hell did Xiaojun have that he didn’t? Jeno was more muscular, taller, more talented, wealthier, more attractive...He was superior to Jeno in every way and everyone else knew it, too.

He honed his acting skills and replied evenly, “Why are you apologizing, y/n? So you like someone else...I’ll live.”

You realized maybe Jeno didn’t like you as much as you thought so you felt relieved to hear his dismissive tone. “Right. Good. I just...thought you should know…”

You and Jeno continued the shoot. He acted like nothing had happened and even behind the scenes, he joked with you and asked you which of the female trainees he should ask out. You berated him because female trainees were not allowed to date and he knew this very well. Jeno was back to his arrogant self and you were relieved.

___

You got a text from Xiaojun that he was finishing up a filming schedule with his bandmates. You wouldn’t be able to see him today because the schedule was running overtime.

He told you to go to dinner with some friends at Osaka Moon. His treat. He was good friends with the chef, apparently. You were on your way to the restaurant to meet your friends.

You were shocked at how down-to-earth Xiaojun still was after achieving so much fame and then he would do things like this. It gave you whiplash but you were having the time of your life with him.

However, you noticed him across the street. Xiaojun always wore different wigs and masks for his disguised outings with you.

But this time, there were no disguises. His side swept blonde hair and his thin framed glasses. There was no mistaking that it was him.

Was the filming for the show at the Downtown Hotel?

You were about to call his name when you saw another woman wrap her arms around him and squeeze his ass. She had long wavy brown hair and a slender frame. She could’ve been a model or a singer. They both entered the expensive hotel. Very bold of him to take her out so publicly when he was still intent on hiding you.

You felt like someone knocked the breath out of you. You shook your head in disbelief.

Immediately, you dialed Xiaojun’s number and there was no answer. You called four more times and nothing.

Son of a bitch, you thought.

He played you. You should’ve known he was no different than any other dickhead A-lister.

You decided to call his bandmates. It turned out that the filming they’d done today wrapped up over two hours ago.

Haechan had no idea where he was. Jisung didn’t either. Jaemin was equally perplexed. Last but not least you called Jeno.

He answered. “Hello?”

At this point, you couldn’t hold back your tears anymore. “Jeno…”

“Y/n? What’s wrong?”

“Do you know where Xiaojun is?”

“Not specifically...he did mention he had a reservation at the Downtown Hotel…”

You sniffled. “He did?”

“I thought he was meeting you…”

“No, he wasn’t…”

“Oh...Oh, shit, y/n. I am so-“

“It’s okay...Thanks Jeno. I’ll see you on Monday…”

You told your friends to have dinner without you and to make sure to spare no expense because your so-called boyfriend was buying. You told them Xiaojun finished at the last minute and wanted to take you dancing.

A total lie so you could wallow at your local bar.

You sat right by the bar and downed a few glasses of beer. Just to feel anything else besides the betrayal you felt.

A half hour later, you were even more buzzed now. A young man sat beside you at the counter.

He started, “Hello, gorgeous.”

You looked at the young man. He was stunning. Another face that belonged on television. Another one of those who was capable of seducing you and tossing you away the very next second.

You flipped the bird. “Bite me.”

The young man scoffed and tried again, “Feisty, aren’t we?”

He got closer to you and you began to feel uncomfortable. “Please leave me alone…”

“Tsk tsk. A beautiful girl like you in tears? You need someone who will bring your smile back.”

“And you’re the man for that job?” Someone interrupted.

You were shocked to find Jeno here. He looked gorgeous in a black leather jacket and dark jeans. His hair was slicked back the way you liked it most and wow, you may have had one too many drinks...A few customers recognized Jeno and started whispering and taking their cameras out.

“Jeno?” You nearly lost your balance as you got up from your chair.

Jeno grabbed you immediately before the other guy could.

The stranger said, “Why do you get to put your hands on her? Just cause you're some pretty boy with mediocre music...I’m sure she’s nothing compared to who you’ve bedded before-“

Jeno socked him in the face and escorted you out of the bar. The stranger cursed you both out as you left. Jeno led you quickly into his manager’s car that he borrowed for the night. You felt a little dizzy.

Jeno fastened your seatbelt.

You smiled at him. “Thanks.”

He looked at you in concern. “Are you okay?”

You shook your head. “Why are men scum, Jeno?”

Jeno sighed. “I’m so sorry about-“

“Don’t say his name...I...never want to see him again...God, now I have to sell all of his merch…”

Jeno frowned in confusion and continued, “I’ll take you home…”

You didn’t want to face your roommates. “No...Can I…Spend the night with you?”

It took all of Jeno’s might not to get out his car and raise his fist in the air. But he composed himself. “Are you sure?”

You nodded, wanting to forget all about Xiaojun and have one thoughtless night with Jeno. “Yes.”

Jeno drove you two to his penthouse suite. He was cautious around you and you were ready to shrug away your inhibitions.

Jeno helped you remove your coat at the entrance. “Take a seat. I’ll get you some water.”

You sat yourself on the couch and opened your legs wide, exposing your panties underneath your skirt. “Jeno, fuck me right now so I can forget his sorry ass.”

Jeno hesitated then but seeing how irresistible you were...He couldn’t help himself.

He asked again. “Are you sure?”

You nodded. You were buzzed but not that buzzed. You wanted to spite Xiaojun. You wanted to acknowledge the part of you that longed for Jeno for so long, too. You’d be stupid to deny that you fantasized about a night with him.

You hesitated before but now you said, why the hell not?  

You and Jeno made love that night. Jeno was over the moon that you were finally in his arms. Sure it was a rebound but the look in your eyes when he was inside you had to mean something. There was a promise there and Jeno held onto that glimmer of hope.

Jeno took you home the next day and he was very cool about the whole night. Right before you returned home. you reminded him about how this was a one night stand and thanked him for a wonderful night.

You were resolute in dumping Xiaojun and simply going back to work. Thankful you only ever worked for Jeno anyway. And as expected, Jeno was his usual self: cocky, flirty, sending his food back for random reasons.

Xiaojun came under the fire for going to a hotel with a potential prostitute. The identity of the woman he was seen with remained a mystery. He tried convincing everyone that the woman was not a prostitute but he couldn’t remember how he met her or what she looked like. That night and along with how crazy Xiaojun sounded caused the company to encourage him to leave. Xiaojun’s contract with LCF Entertainment was terminated.

The week after you and Jeno made love...You started catching feelings for him. Every glance. Every fleeting touch. It drove you mad. And suddenly that one night stand was something you wanted again. And again. And again.

You accompanied Jeno and his manager as he attended a gallery opening. You were in charge of his photos for his social media. He looked extremely dapper in his red suit. You just wanted to rip his clothes off and make love to him in front of all of the guests. Becoming a work of art yourselves.

These thoughts you’ve been having used to scare you but now...you owned them. Tonight, when you got him alone, you would tell him how you really felt. You hoped you weren’t too late.

Jeno’s manager excused himself to get some refreshments. Jeno observed a painting while you took some more photos.

“Stunning,” you said aloud.

Jeno’s eyes grew at your words. “Wow, y/n...All the years we’ve worked together and you’ve never made a comment about my looks…”

Your face grew warm then. “I’m feeling a little bolder these days…”

He grinned. “Is that so?”

“Jeno, I won’t beat around the bush…I haven’t stopped thinking about you since that night…”

“Y/n…”

“I know I said it was a one night stand and...You’ve moved on…”

Jeno started, “I haven’t…”

You were shocked to hear it. “Really?”

He moved closer to you and moved the camera away from your line of sight. “What are you saying, y/n?” His voice was dangerously low.

“I’m saying...that I want to be with you, Jeno.”

Jeno’s smile looked so gorgeous then. He was the true work of art at the gallery. “Well, y/n, I’ve made my feelings abundantly clear for a while now…”

He kissed you then. And the cameras started flashing.

You were on cloud nine. You finally released your suppressed feelings for the rockstar before you.

___

You’ve been together for two years now. He made you feel safe and loved. He showered you with gifts and trips to the most beautiful parts of the world.

As for the response from netizens and the company? Jeno had all the power and he could handle a few naysayers. Your job as his photographer and videographer remained intact. And you were well on your way to transitioning to your own film projects: your dream.

You and Jeno had become a couple to root for. They called you The Prince and The Pauper Turned Princess. You hated your label but whenever you looked at Jeno’s eyes, any anxiety or anger quickly faded.

Jeno had a solo performance in your city tonight and you were seated in a private booth. He was performing so well, moving from instrument to instrument. Driving people to tears with his long low notes. And then he surprised everyone with his announcement.

“Before I perform ‘Changed Your Mind’, I want to give a shout-out to the woman of my dreams, y/n, who is here with us tonight.”

The stadium roared in excitement and many heads turned to you. Your eyes never left Jeno.

“Y/n, I love you so much. We’ve come so far, baby. And I want us to never stop. Which is why…”

He got down from the stage and was escorted by security down to the crowd. He ran his hands past adoring fans as he made his way to you.

He entered your booth with his camera crew and security close by. “Y/n, will you marry me?”

You cried out, “Yes!”

Jeno picked you up and spun you around. You kissed passionately. The crowd’s roars thundered now. It was a celebration. You didn’t care that all eyes were on you now, as well. All you cared about was Jeno. And he loved you more than anything else in the world.

You truly found your soulmate and you couldn’t be happier.

___

Jeno finished his show and was backstage cooling down with a bottle of water.

“Good job tonight,” a woman said as she stood at the door of Jeno’s dressing room.

“Thank you, sis. To what do I owe the pleasure?”

Jeno’s older sister Yeeun sat on the couch of the dressing room. “How does it feel to have her in your clutches now?”

Jeno smirked. “Pretty damn great.”

“And I’m here to collect my payment, little brother.”

Jeno sighed. “Really? It’s been two years.”

Yeeun looked at her manicured nails. “I’ve been busy.”

Jeno laughed. “Screwing over taken men? I’m sorry, I meant screwing taken men?”

“Nope. That task was a one-and-done deal. How is that poor boy doing these days?”

“Xiaojun? He’s back at school getting his master’s...He’s happy.”

“Has he tried to contact y/n since then?” Yeeun asked.

Jeno chuckled. “No. Why would he?”

She smiled at him. “They were sweet together. And you tore them apart because you couldn’t take no for an answer, could you?”

Jeno rolled his eyes. “And what about it? I have a right to get whatever I want. Do you know who I am?”

Yeeun sighed. “Yes, you repeatedly tell the family group chat who you are every week. And we all take it because you pay us well…”

Jeno and Yeeun had conspired against you and Xiaojun. Jeno stole Xiaojun’s phone and Yeeun charmed Xiaojun to join her for a night at the hotel. Jeno planned for you to go to Osaka Moon so you could see Xiaojun and Yeeun together.

Jeno watched you as you broke down in tears, calling each of his bandmates. He made sure he was far enough away by the time you called him. He played the part of a concerned friend very well. He had to take up acting, another field he would surely dominate. And with you as his director? It made him hard just thinking about it.

Jeno didn’t coincidentally find you at the bar. He’d been tailing and that stranger who hit on you was only an added bonus. Jeno could play the unsuspecting hero and you would eat it up. And that you did. He was satisfied to know that you wanted to sleep with him. He didn’t care about being a rebound.

Even so, he wasn’t going to take any chances. So after you left his penthouse the next morning, he took the bedsheets you came on and the strands of hair you left behind and got to work.

Did you really think Jeno amassed such success and wealth all on his own? He had a little help from his family and their friends from Hell, of course. Jeno’s family came from a long line of Satan-worshipping witches. Jeno was the youngest of the descendants.

Human sacrifice was only a small token of the Lee family’s appreciation to Lucifer. So Jeno’s deception of Xiaojun was almost nothing in the list of gruesome things Jeno has done to reach the top of his game.

Yeeun was able to literally charm Xiaojun with her own special concoction. Once she and Xiaojun had sex, she wiped his memory of that hour and left him alone at the hotel. Confused. Disoriented. Worried.

As for you? Well, you were the most irresistible creature in this world. Your immunity to his charms was only the first step in his growing feelings for you. You were brilliant and talented at your craft, always capturing his best features on camera. You were gorgeous. He was surprised you didn’t become an idol at LCF yourself. You were warm and sweet and giving. Even if the company was cutthroat, he saw how you’d be with your coworkers and the other idols. You were just a pure, loving girl. And he desperately needed you. Desired you. Craved you.

He simply had to call you his.

With your samples, he was able to create the perfect spell to make you his.

Forever.

That was what Jeno called true love.

[Fin]

[thequeenindisguise]

SOMEWHERE IN NEVERLAND (ICHIRUKI AU)

Here it is! My first and probably last entry for Ichiruki Month 2021... to be more specific, it’s for Day 11 with the prompt “What do you dream of?”  

I think the last time I participated was like, what? Five years ago? Yikes. I didn’t even improve haha and okay, I know somewhere, sometime ago, someone has already done this AU though. And this was based off the amazing work of jon-lock from deviant art so this would look like crap next to his work. I mean I suck at coloring and at a bunch of other things, I know! But I just really felt like doing this. 

I was actually thinking of writing a fic about it, but if I’m the one doing it, it’s probably going to be multi-chaptered and I just can’t commit to that. So if you know of any fics or fanart with the same theme, hope you can link them to me 😊 I’d really love to dive myself in them.

But despite saying that, it didn’t stop me from writing this silly one-shot called Somewhere In Neverland feel free to read and review there, if you have the time.

And now, if you read through all that, thank you so much for your time! Be safe, hope you enjoy the rest of your day and the rest of Ichiruki Month :D

And now for some more story time, you don’t need to read through this. It will be just me sharing some personal stuff… So feel free to move on with your life without this. Seriously. You can stop here if you just accidentally pressed the keep reading button, you are forgiven 😊

Oh… you’re still reading? Okay, then. So I’ve been really depressed lately, more on because my current job sucks, I just lost the opportunity to get my dream job, the pandemic’s still on-going and I just feel like nothing’s really going on with my life (T.T) I’m broke AF, it’s hard to fall asleep, my face is all pimply, I’ve gained a lot of weight and basically, this is just a low point for me. 

Okay, I know that there are other people with much bigger problems than what I’m going through right now so I just try to deal with it on my own. I made a fanart, just to feel like I’m focusing on something and I actually finished the thing just to ease my mind of my worries. It was kinda therapeutic and I kind of like the feeling of actually accomplishing something. And I even mustered up the courage to join the discord server for IR. My anti-social ass was proud of that. I was even thinking of posting this fanart there just to show everyone that I really appreciate them for welcoming me but at the last minute I chickened out but ended up posting it here? I don’t know either. I’m weird like that. Even though everyone there seemed really fun and supportive, I just… didn’t want to ruin the vibe with my negative aura (the latest chapter was enough to trigger everyone. Didn’t wanna add to that).

Anyway, thinking about these past horrible days and listening to some really sad songs, because why not add to the drama? I was listening to one song about running away to “Neverland” and it got me thinking wouldn’t it be great if I were to just stay a kid forever? That way I wouldn’t have to deal with the pressures of adulthood. Then I thought about Wendy from Neverland and somehow I remembered that on that 2nd Disney movie, she grew up. And to confirm it, I just had to search for that clip on youtube. And yes, it was the part where Peter saw her as an adult and oh god, I kid you not, I started bawling. One, because I didn’t realize that I ship them… oops… and I wondered if Wendy, even as an adult, ever thought of what it’d be like if she had stayed in Neverland. Then I also found this deleted scene from the live action movie which showed Peter reuniting with her, hoping to take her back but he couldn’t anymore because she’s all grown up, and he was so heartbroken by it but then she introduces him to her daughter, with who he takes with him (weird? Maybe that was why it was deleted haha).

And so, I’ve been thinking about it a lot and as always I ended up thinking about Bleach and IR because of the new chapter and all (which wasn’t released yet back then). And I wondered what would it be like if they were in Peter pan and Wendy’s shoes—but first off, I didn’t think Ichigo would fit the role of not growing up because I don’t know, despite being a teen, he looked matured and kinda scary? Kids would never go with him. He’ll be better as the Grinch of Christmas because kids would probably feel like they’ll be bullied even though he’s a nice guy. And so I realize, oh it’s better if we switch them up and make Rukia Peter Pan because she’d be looking young forever while Ichigo grows old (which was what I was expecting from Bleach but somehow they all seem to be aging at the same time now, with all the marriages and the making babies or whatever) And to parallel the manga I realized that maybe having Ichigo live his life (in the world of the living) and have a family would probably be something that Rukia would be really proud of and would be happy to see (Okay, hold up. Just to be clear, I still don’t like the ending for so many other reasons but if it had to go down with Ichigo making a family WITHOUT Rukia then this better be the damn reason for it and that’s to protect him by making him live a normal and safe life before they reunite again in SS. I rest my case.).

And so I connect all this to Day 11 – What do you dream of? Because, well, since the prompt really is up to interpretation… it can be like a “dream” in life? Or just maybe a dream at night? Anyway, this is what I dreamt of literally. Again, I’ve been thinking about it all the time lately  so I had to let it out. And of course, in relation to IR and in this AU setting, they probably dream of being together too (both in life and at night haha) <3

And that’s about it. I just want to leave this long message here so that when the time comes that I feel so much better, I’ll know what I was going through behind this not-so-good-but-a-little-better-than-my-other-works-so-far fanart and that one-shot that I tried my best to write despite my writing skills being very rusty, and know that it will be alright someday and that I’ll probably get through it whatever it was that I’m going through at this moment.

If you’ve reached until the end then wow. Bless your kind soul really and hope you have a great dinner and of course, thank you for lending me your ears or eyes (since you had to read). I may not know you but I really, really appreciate your time 😊

[sessrinsfanclub]

Dear Followers of SessRin's Fan Club

This morning like every morning I get up at 5:30am to have mommy time. I make myself a cup of coffee and check out my channel and other social media networks, and of course see whats going on in the Yashahime and SessRin world! When I woke up this morning, I was shocked to see I have successfully gained 101 subscribers!! Not only that, but my Yashahime Vlogs! Both Videos have almost reached 1,000 views!! My reaction to the trailer has received so far 892 views and the latest yashahime vlog has received 980 views and counting!! That’s INSANE!!

I’m just a small-town southern girl in the Blue Ridge Mountains of Virginia! I’m a full time Hairdresser, wife, and mother of a wild 2-year-old little girl named Maria. When I started SessRin’s Fan Club 3 months ago, I had no idea what I was doing. All I knew was there were amazing sessrin fan fiction stories that people needed to know and talk about! I had so many thoughts and theories when it came to sesshomaru character arc, his wife Rin, and Yashahime! I was a big fan of Inuyasha when I was in middle school. I would constantly sneak out of my room in the middle of the night, just to catch the beauty of the feudal fairytale. Dragon Ball Z and Sailor Moon also played a major part of my childhood. I was going through tough times when I was kid, having my parents divorce and move into a new town, and new school was very overwhelming. But not only did God get me thru it but those Anime shows including my all time favorite Inuyasha kept me happy and sane. Like the others Inuyasha helped me escape that world of darkness and made me forget my hardships and life changes. I escaped to world of hot demons, badass battles, core and blood, hardships and a beautiful but complicated love story of INUKAG! My love for the show and most of all Sesshomaru and Rin has always been in my heart and soul as my most favorite characters! With Sesshomaru I learned to be tough and have confidence in myself, and of course he’s so sexy duh!!! Rin taught me to love and respect. Kindness and loyalty in friendships and relationships. I have always believed they were meant to be together forever!

So, when I heard the annoucment of Yashahime Princess Half Demon season 2. I was thrilled and excited! Looking at the twins I knew right then and there our dreams as fans had finally granted our wish! And was officially annoucment on Jan 16th, 2021, they were CANON! My world like yours was forever changed and for the better. My love for fan fiction grew even more and I was so in love with some. I just wanted to climb up these mountains and shout for all to hear! There are writers who are so gifted and so talented. They really should have consider having their works published! Their stories and plots were better than some book on the New York Times Best Seller. So, 3 months ago I decided then and said “Screw It!! I’m goanna do it!” and so here I am!

Now I know I’m not the best of the best on YouTube’s Platform or anywhere as a matter of fact and that’s ok! I know it takes years and a lot of money and challenges. It has and its goanna be a lot of work, and I still have so much to learn and achieve before I can get there. I have recently started saving money on the side to have the opportunity to purchase new equipment but most importantly new software! Since purchasing my editor software ive been able to edit my videos so much better and I really enjoy being creative! So here over the course of the next few months, you will start to notice the channel’s improvements and several changes overtime, so please hang in there with me! My plan for this channel is to start having better opportunities to connect with you thru live streams and have great discussions! SessRin’s Book Club is in the works as well! A place where we can do and discuss our Fan Fic stories of the month. But most of all getting to know the writer and learning about their journey. I'm also getting prepared for Yashahime Season 2!

I really would like to thank the staff, and creators behind SessRin Is Canon for taking a chance with me when I started his Club. Not only did they accept me but helped me out in so many ways. Whenever I had a question, suggestion, and ask for their advice. They were there for me every step of the way! Their constant support and kindness ill forever be grateful for! I would also like to thank YOU THE VIEWERS! Thank you for subscribing to the channel, for liking, sharing, and leaving comments! Every bit of that not only gives me the encouragement to keep going, but it’s what helps YouTube know if my channel is worth putting out there in content searches and outreach! It feels good know there are at least 100 people who like what I do and enjoy my passion for sesshomaru and fangirling over SessRin thru conversations, fan fiction, and art! Thank you, guys, for everything! Its nice to know I have a lot of people who love sessrin just as much as I do, and want to talk to me, and hear what I even have to say!

I love this fandom and community so much! I feel like I’m part of one big happy family and it’s the best feeling in the world! Thank you again for all the love, support, and kindness you have shown to me! It mite just be 3 months in, but its been the best 3 months of my life! Thank you once again and may we continue this journey together! Lets raise our glasses and cheers to the best canon couple in the anime universe, Lord Sesshomaru and Lady Rin of the West!

With Love,

Mrs. Dowdy aka KatyDid

SRFC

[starstruckkittensweets]

Hi Star 👋🏼

Omg, so I know I left comments on the latest chapters, but I had to come here to sing some praises too, because holy hell those chapters were amazing!!! 😩 I just love your writing so so much, and I will forever be grateful I stumbled across AWWW last year. It is by far one of my favorite Levi fics EVER, if not right there at the top. The detail, the world-building, the characterization of Mia is all just so fucking perfect and I’m always in awe whenever I read a new chapter.

I love Mia and her character so so much. She just gets Levi, and that’s one of the things I love most about her. She understands him, understands how he is, and it’s so freaking sweet and adorable 😭 the way you’ve inserted her into canon is AMAZING. She fits so well, as if she were made to be there. Her personality meshes so well with everyone else. Her insecurities, her flaws, her virtues, everything about her is so damn relatable.

All of the things she’s gone through, yet she still keeps going, and it’s such an admirable quality of hers, her resiliency. Yea, she still struggles, has her ups and downs, but it’s not “blink” and everything is fine again. It’s a constant process of working through everything, and with the support of her friends and Levi, she’s able to keep making progress. I think that’s part of what makes her such a beautifully well-written character.

Also, Levi? Yea your portrayal of him is so perfect and spot-on. I think different potential partners/lovers for him will bring out different sides of him, and I love the side of him that Mia pulls out. He has these moments where he’s just so sweet and affectionate, but in a way that’s utterly Levi and I love it.

And holy shit the smut between them 🥴🥵 you write their steamy moments so well, and it’s always fun to read. The progression of Mia moving from where she was at the start to where she is now was a blast to read. The slow-burn honestly killed me but was well-worth the wait. It just made sense for a character like Levi, and a character like Mia too.

Anyways, long story short, I love love love this fic, so so much 😊💜

Scarlet you have NO IDEA how happy you make me whenever I see you in my inbox! I read your comments on AO3 on Sunday when I was having a kinda cruddy day at work and immediately they made me feel so much better! And then I look to see another message in my inbox from you 🥰

First off I hope you’re having a lovely day/night, and I hope you’re taking care of yourself! Are you drinking water and getting lots of rest? I hope so! ❤️💞❤️ (sorry for being the “mom” friend, I guess it comes naturally!)

And now, onto my reply:

I’m so so thankful you stumbled upon my story too! Reading your comments and hearing your constant support and love for Mia and AWWW has been such an inspiration for me to keep going with it! Usually I write for myself but it’s another thing entirely when you know there’s someone out there who loves reading this story just as much as you love writing it. Mia’s character has always been my baby, and I’m so grateful that even after all this time (and months and chapters and events in the story) you still root for her! She’s changed a lot since the first chapter of AWWW and it’s nice to look back on those days to see how much she’s grown.

Mia’s resiliency is probably her core trait, the one thing about her that will probably never change. No matter how many times she falls or fails, or how many times people tell her “no” and belittle her or try to make her feel a certain way, she’s always going to get back up and keep fighting for what she believes in. Sometimes it’ll take her some time to recover and heal, but she’s determined to push through and be the best version of herself she can possibly be.

And that’s where Levi comes in—a constant wall of support, and yet he has the brains (and mouth) to tell her to slow down or stop when she needs to. And in return she does the same to him; they ground each other, they’re each other’s weight in this world. They support each other and protect each other, and they’re not afraid to let the other know when they’re upset or when they need some extra affection (although it doesn’t always come out the right way)! Their communication was one of their weakest points in the beginning, and I think it’s gotten so much better over time, as they’ve gotten used to how they both work in this weird little relationship of theirs.

Yes! I do agree that different partners pull out different sides of Levi, and there’s a lot of unexplored territory that gets to be revealed as they grow alongside each other! That’s why I love to read fics for him, both Reader and OC, because every author has their own interpretation of him and his character. And there’s a lot of potential there to create powerful character moments and situations that allows both Levi and the reader/OC to grow as people—not just characters, but people. And I’ll be honest, the sweet and affectionate side of Levi is just too precious and quite a few of those moments are purely self-indulgent! (Especially the forehead kisses—oh to be kissed on the forehead by Levi himself...)

And I’m so glad you enjoyed the smut too! (Honestly when I saw your comments from Ch. 58 I thought “ooooh boy I can’t wait till Scarlet gets to the next chapter” 😏) This has to be one of my favorite scenes of this story to write! Not just because of the smut, but because of Mia’s somewhat “reclamation” of herself and her relationship with Levi. We’ve seen it before when she asks him to return to the sweetheart nickname in Ch. 55, but this way is much more physical and intimate. They know each other so well at this point, they know their strengths and weaknesses and what to expect from each other. They give each other space and time when they need it. And after everything they’ve been through for the past few months (almost a year in the story) they’re finally at ease with each other, enough to trust each other with what they once had. And seeing them reclaim that for themselves was so much fun to write!

The slow burn nearly killed me too, though! 😅 Writing it was so painful at times, and I remember thinking to myself “oh god it’s Ch. 40 and they just kissed, I have like 28 more to go before this story’s done”. But i think it was all worth it in the end! Sure there were long chapters where we were all just screaming at them to get together already, and a lot of that comes from my fears of moving the story and their romance too quickly! But there’s nothing more satisfying than seeing a slow burn romance finally reach its peak, and seeing these two lovebirds have a few moments of hard-earned peace with each other.

Alright that’s the end of my rant Scarlet! I’m so glad you’re enjoying the story and Mia’s character and everything else along those lines! And I promise I’ll get to your AO3 comments soon, I wanna answer them in-depth as well! Always a pleasure hearing from you my dear 😘 take care and I’ll see you soon! 🥰❤️💞❤️💞

[wasabito]

Goodbye 2020 and Hello 2021!

i went back and forth between doing this, and then i literally thought back on all the conversations, debates, teams formed in the name of simp solidarity. all the times we went crazy piggy-backing off each other’s ideas. the memesssss. literally everything was just so undeniably hilarious and amazing- i can’t even really put it into words tbh but anyway! here we go:

since the year is concluding, i just wanted to do a quick little appreciation post for some of my moots in the jjk fandom. it was (and is) a pleasure connecting with y’all on this platform. cheers to 2021! ♥️

@kaikaikaitan​

thank you for literally being one of my first friends on here! from us yelling about the latest chapter to you always checking up on me and reminding me to take care of myself, i just want to say that i’m really grateful to have you as a friend! love you so much kai ♥️

@yinses 

thank you for being such an angel and indulging my feral thoughts about getou and choso lmfao AND drawing bokuto ship art for me 🥺🥺🥺🥺 i love you!! every time i talk to you i get so giddy-!! thank you for feeding me with lovely content, nanami and the yellow saints are grateful for your service! 😂

@mythicalotter 

thank you for being such a gem! you and kim where literally the first people to talk to me in the server and you were so freakin nice and accommodating of my awkward ass lmfao thanks for always putting a big dumb smile on my face - love you lotts (hehehe) even though you and coure tag team me sometimes 😀 

@mystic-sky 

thank you for always matching my simp energy!!! lmao you always get me sky (we basically share a braincell) and your readerxgojo makes me 🥺😭😌🤗😩 you’re such a positive presence that makes everyone around you happy, me especially! i adore you so much bby!

@inaflashimagine 

thank you for the amazing talks we had about literally any and everything! from our long-winded conversations and brain-wrinkling over the manga to thirsting over nanami fanart to laughing over the memes to sharing so many fic ideas! it was an amazing experience overall! love you vanessa 😭

@cloudyzoshi 

thank you for being such an inspiration to me! your fics were some of the first i read when i initially got into jjk and you literally had me instantly hooked from the very start! also your support 😭 like all the times you complimented my writing still lingers in my head lmfao you’re an awesome writer and person, love you chacha!!

@gojoho 

thank you for always being a cool and genuine person!! like where would i be without your awesome meta giving me brain wrinkles??!! or your gojo blurbs that make me feel so 🥺🥺🥺 your headcanons are legit so spot on, i always look foreward to reading them! love you with my whole heart, coure!!

@sukumen​

thank you for being so freakin kind- you’re an amazing writer and it’s been great talking with you 😭 especially when we’re just being simps over bokuto or sukuna lmfao everytime i see you in my notifs i get all smiley and stuff 😂 pls- lemme just stop here but i love ya!!

@ahkaahshi​

fran!! i’m so happy to be able to talk you and just simp over choso and getou! everytime you pop up in my asks i get so happy! also your manga colorings are so amazing- i’m pretty sure i stared at the getou one for like ever 😭 can’t wait for what 2021 has in store! love you boo!!

@cindiella

kim! thank you for being so amazing and funny. literally your tweet headcanons always have me in tears! especially the ones about gojo. and you’re so talented, your art is immaculate!! thank you for making me laugh and chatting with me too, love you babes ♥️

@teoran

teo! thank you for being my main suguru getou partner in crime 😭😭 like sharing fics and fanart between one another was always a major highlight! that and our mutual love for our cult-leading husband 💀 you’re so awesome, love you!

@kuso-deku 

waah yulia! you’re such a sweetie! i love you! and i’m so glad i was able to talk to you more. i love how you always send the hottest fanart like 🥵 and i love the ship name you gave me for nanami (and the choso one too) 🥺🥺🥺 connecting with you has been such a pleasure!

@3rdgymbros​ 

ahh samantha!! okay so i know our friendship is relatively new but i just wanted to say thank you for being such a cool and down to earth person! like you’re literally such a sweetheart 🥺 and i just enjoy our talks so much, even though we basically yell about psycho-pass and type in all caps lmfao

sooo, i honestly didn’t realize i’d made so many friends until i listed it out like this but dang i seriously wish i could give you all forehead kissies lmao

happy new year, everyone! much love to you, always!

[pixiegrl]

I’m Back in My Body

Luke has a conversation with KayKay that pushes him to re-consider his own gender identity.

Hello all. This was born out of @daydadahlias and I chatting about KayKay in their latest fic and Jess reminded me of part of this series, where I had KayKay come out as non-binary and in turn, it helped Luke come out as non-binary. KayKay uses she/they pronouns and Luke uses he/they pronouns. So thank Jess for pushing me to finish this part of the series. I’ve been thinking about Luke’s gender in this series for a while and Jess gave me the push i needed to explore it. 

Big thanks to @tigerteeff for many things: the original push to write this series, to keep going with this series, for the encouragement of having Luke and KayKay be non-binary. Heath has inspired many parts of this series and I love them for it. Also thanks to @lifewasradical, for the help on this doc and the constant love and support I really wouldn't be half the writer I am without you I love you thanks for putting up with me. And to Mandie, Molly, Brooke and Meg for reminding me to do what I love and listening to me while I ranted about writing. Love you guys.

on ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29793279

As far as days go, it’s a pretty average Tuesday. Ashton’s out doing some music things with his friend Matt and Michael and Calum are doing their own weird MikeyandCal things that had sounded vaguely close to sexual. Luke had pouted about being left until Ashton had kissed him and told him it was healthy to spend time apart. Luke doubts it, but it also gives him some free time to go hang out with (harass) Sierra and KayKay at the store. 

Luke shows up close to noon, blowing through the door in a floral sundress and heeled gold boots. It had been one of those mornings, when Luke had looked at all of his pants and felt uncomfortable at the thought of anything masculine. The weather’s nice enough for sundresses now, a relief to Luke’s scratchy brain when he’d put it on. It’s a dress Sierra recommended once, all soft pinks and bright flowers and he wants Sierra to see it. 

Sierra’s standing at the counter, clicking around on her laptop. She grins when she spots Luke, waving him over.

“Luke! Just the person I was hoping to see. I’m putting the final touches on those photos you wanted for Ashton’s gift. Come look!” She waves him over. Luke grins, crossing the store to lean over the counter and look at her computer. 

Luke looks good in them, propped up and posed on the couch they’d used, in his bed (which had taken some convincing to get Ashton out of the house long enough without him suspecting what was going on). Luke looks soft and delicate, pink lips and soft curls and wrapped in lace and bows.

“They look so good, Si. How’d you manage to make me look so good?” 

“Thank KayKay. Without them taking the photos, they wouldn’t look so good. I can only do so much in editing. You’re easy to photograph and KayKay took such good photos of you.”

“I’m not a particularly good model. KayKay’s just really good.”

“Give yourself some credit Luke,” Sierra says, smacking Luke on the arm. He blushes. 

“Where is KayKay anyway?”

“In the back. Why don’t you go see them?” Sierra says, going back to the laptop. Luke nods, rounding the counter and going behind the curtain. KayKay’s sitting at the table in the back on a computer. KayKay glances up at Luke and that’s when he notices the name badge. It has KayKay’s name on it, but under that is listed they/them. Luke stops.

“Hey Luke,” they say smiling, holding their hand out to Luke. Luke sits down next to them, looking down at the name badge.

“Hey KayKay. Sierra was just showing me the photos. Are the pronouns new?” Luke blurts out, questions running through his mind. 

“No. Some days are just more they days and today is one of them, so I put my pronouns on my nametag. No confusion that way.”

“What do you mean they days?” 

“I’m non-binary Luke. Sometimes I have days where I feel comfortable being a woman and some days I don’t feel gender connected at all.”

“I...I didn’t know about that,” Luke says, quietly. The words stick with him, something about the feeling about them sitting heavy in his chest. He can’t place what it is about what KayKay’s said that’s sticking with him, but he’s just on the edge of it as he stares at their face.

“Did you really not know I was non-binary?” 

“I guess I just never paid attention to some of the cues or the pronouns you two used or whatever. I feel so stupid now.” 

“If you had misgendered me, I would have said something.” 

“What does it mean?” 

“What does what mean?” 

“Being non-binary. What does it mean for you?” 

KayKay shrugs, pushing a strand of hair behind their ear. Luke tracks the movement, trying to focus on it, to stop the panic in his own chest that he can’t place. 

“I just don’t always feel right in my own body. Sometimes I wake up and I feel okay. I feel like this is who I am. That I’m a woman and it’s okay. That that’s how I want to present myself and be seen by the world as on those days. Some days I wake up and I know it’s not one of those days. I know it’s not going to be a day where I feel right with myself. I feel a disconnect from the person I am. Sometimes feeling right with myself means I don’t feel like a woman. I just feel like me, no gender attached. It changes how I present myself, how I want the world to see me. Sometimes I don’t want to be seen at all. I just want to exist without anyone labeling me or who I am. Some days I don’t mind the labels. Some days I’m indifferent. Some days it feels like I can’t handle it if someone gives me a gendered label and I have to correct them. Everyone’s different but that’s how I feel,” they say, smiling over at Luke, soft and slow. Luke swallows, feels his chest tighten a little bit. 

“Oh,” Luke whispers, wrinkling up his nose. A lot of what they’re saying feels a little too close to home for Luke. The feeling of unrest in their body, of not feeling connected to the image they’re putting on. How the idea of how other people’s perception was wrong to how they were feeling. It all feels too close to how Luke feels. The sense of unease on some days when interviewers would call them all boys. The fact that the lingerie and dresses blur the lines of who Luke is. That no matter how nice it is, seeing the look of want and desire on Ashton’s face when he sees what Luke’s wearing, it was never about that. It was always about Luke’s ability to breathe, the warmth in his chest, the feeling of security he got whenever he put it all on. It was always about how he felt like it was coming home, getting to see himself in the mirrors, see the delicate lines and soft angles, crying the illusion of softness and femininity to his body, the tightness easing when he sees himself in the mirrors. Luke thinks he might be crying, feels the pressure at the back of his eyes.

“Luke, have you really never thought about this before?” KayKay asks, voice soft. Luke turns to face them, sees the look of concern on their face. Luke just shakes his head, pressing his face into his crossed arms. He’s trying so hard not to cry, doesn’t want KayKay to see him like this, even if they’re his friend. He hates when anyone who isn’t Ashton sees him at his lowest. 

“I guess I didn’t want to. I had one teenage panic about my sexuality. I already had the crisis about wearing lingerie and the dresses and everything else. I have had so many fucking crisises. I’m supposed to be happy now, why can’t I just be happy with who I am,” Luke mumbles. He sniffs, trying to stop the tears from flowing. KayKay sighs, scooting closer till they’re pressed against Luke’s side. They wrap their arms around him in a pseudo hug, resting their head on top of his. 

“Luke, honey, describe to me again how you feel when you wear everything?”

“Happy. I feel so happy. I put the first pair of panties on and it just felt right. I haven’t fit right in my own body since I had my growth spurt when I got all broad and tall. I used to hate looking at myself because I felt too big and masculine and I just miss feeling delicate and it did that. It made me feel delicate and lovely and I felt like I could breath. And I have some days where just wearing them underneath my shirts and trousers are enough, where I feel masculine and that’s okay. But I have some days, where I have to wear it all. I have to put on the dress and the heels and I go out in all of it, where I want to deck myself out, I want to be as feminine as possible. I had someone call me Miss in the store once,” Luke says. KayKay hums. 

“How did you feel?” 

“About?” 

“Her perception of you.” 

Luke pauses, considering it. He hasn’t thought about the incident in months. It was one of the few days where he’s gotten dressed up and gone out in public without any of the guys and without going to Sierra and KayKay’s store. He’d woken up feeling itchy in his own skin, kept pulling on layers, the bra and panties not doing anything on their own. He’d had to put on a whole thing, long flowing summer dress and wedges, makeup to match, until he’d felt comfortable enough to look in the mirror. He’d gone to Ulta and ended up poking around the makeup until a sales associate had come over, called him Miss, asked if he needed anything. She’d asked for his name and without thinking he’d said Liz. He doesn’t know what made him say it, knows that even if he had said Luke no one would have cared, but something in the moment made him want to be feminine. He’s never told anyone this before, took the memory home with him. He never even told Ashton about it, the way the feeling of it had settled in his chest, having someone look at him and see feminine.

“It felt okay. Having someone see me and see feminine it just felt so good. I have to be Stage Luke all the time, that it just felt nice to have someone see me and not wonder. But I don’t feel female enough either, ” Luke says. 

“Maybe that’s what it means for you. For me, being non-binary means I have some days where I feel like a woman, like that’s who I am and some days where I just feel like I’m not, where I don’t feel connected to my gender at all. For you, maybe it means some days you feel more masculine and comfortable being a man and sometimes you don’t feel that way at all. Maybe some days you feel more feminine.” 

“Is that allowed?” 

“Luke sweetie, it’s you. It’s all about how you perceive yourself, what you think of yourself as. There’s no right way or wrong way to be non-binary. That’s the beauty of it. It’s all up to you,” Kaykay says. Luke rolls the words around in his head, thinking about them. Thinks about what it means to have a word to describe how he’s feeling, the sense of who he is. Luke’s never felt all the way “female” exactly, but he does have days where that feels closer to who he is than “male” does. 

“Is it?”

“It is. It’s all a personal experience. That’s the wonderful thing about personal gender experiences. They’re unique to each person,” KayKay says, smiling at Luke, squeezing his arm. Luke smiles at them, pressing his face into their shoulder. 

“I think today is one of those days for me. I woke up and I thought about what I wanted to wear today and the idea of anything masculine made me feel uncomfortable. I didn’t feel comfortable until I went through my whole routine.”

“So maybe today is a they day,” KayKay says softly. Luke rolls the words around in his head.

“I think maybe it is. I think today I want to try it,” Luke says softly. KayKay nods. It’s different to think about, trying to wrap their head around it, but it feels good. Thinking about themselves like that, removing the idea of being one or the other and just existing. 

“I’m proud of you Lu. I’m here if you need anything,” KayKay says, kissing them on the temple. Luke smiles, turning to face KayKay.

“Thanks.”

“Anytime. Now, I heard there were photos to show you. Come on, let’s gush about how pretty you are,” KayKay says, pulling Luke to their feet. Luke grins. It feels right, something about it just feels right.

***

When Luke gets home, Ashton’s car is already in the driveway. Luke sits in the car for a bit, tapping their fingers against the steering wheel. They’ve been thinking about the conversation since talking to KayKay, how to talk to Ashton about it. Luke doesn’t know if it’s too soon or whatever to talk to Ashton about how they’re feeling, but Luke wants Ashton to know. They want Ashton to know they’re exploring themselves and what it means to Luke. Luke’s nervous about how Ashton’s going to respond to it, but it’s Ashton. Luke’s pretty sure there’s nothing they could really do to upset Ashton at this point, easy-going, loving Ashton.

Luke turns off the car engine, leaving the car and heading up the steps to their front door.

“Hey Ash,” Luke calls, coming through the front door. They hear the sounds of Petunia’s nails on the floor, rushing to the door to demand attention from Luke. Luke gladly gives it to her, dropping to their knees and cooing at her.

“In the kitchen darling,” Ashton calls. Luke scoops up Petunia, making their way through the house, finding Ashton at the kitchen table. He’s clicking around on his laptop, frowning.

“What’s up Ash?”

“Looking for tickets to Australia. Fucking complicated to find anything on short notice.”

“Not expensive?”

“We’re rockstars baby,” Ashton teases, looking up at Luke. He’s wearing his glasses, smiling enough that his dimples are showing. Luke giggles, setting Petunia down so that they can climb into Ash’s lap, press a kiss to his lips. Ashton returns the kiss happily, squeezing Luke’s hips, letting Luke sling their arms around Ashton’s shoulders.

“You look nice,” Ashton says.

“Thanks. Felt like a good day for it. Went to see Sierra and KayKay.”

“How was it?”

“I wanted to talk to you about something,” Luke says, figuring it’s better to get it over with. Ashton furrows his brow, letting Luke settle into his lap before turning away from his computer to face him.

“What’s wrong sweetheart?”

“KayKay was talking to me about how they’re non-binary and I think I might be too. They were describing it and I just...I felt so connected to that. I don’t always feel right in my body. Sometimes I feel like Luke, like I’m okay in my own body, and sometimes I just don’t. I don’t feel quite female, but sometimes I just feel more feminine and that’s how I want the world to see me. I’m not sure what it all means, but I want to explore it.” 

“Oh Luke sweetie, of course you can. Whatever you need darling, I’m right here for you. Is today one of those days?”

“Yeah. I think it is. It just feels like it,” Luke says. Ashton nods, face open and understanding. Luke doesn’t have the words to keep describing how they’re feeling over and over again today, but Ashton’s easy acceptance and love feels good. It reminds Luke that they don’t have to figure everything out today, that they have time. They have time and they have the words to describe how they’re feeling and they have Ashton. Everything else will fall into place after that.

***

Luke waits a couple weeks before sitting down with Michael and Calum to talk about it. Luke spends the time between their revelation and sitting down to talk to the guys. It gives Luke some time to explore what their gender means for them, wrap their head around the words. KayKay is sweet about it, giving Luke answers and resources where they fail to have the answer. Between KayKay’s support and Ashton’s easy acceptance, it’s helped Luke figure out what they want to do. Luke’s still not sure how to come out to their family or even to their fans, but Luke knows that the only way to do that is to talk to Michael and Calum. Luke hasn’t come out to anyone except for Ashton yet. It feels right though, taking the first leap and telling the guys. Luke’s hoping that telling their closest friends will ease some of the tension and uncertainty of having to tell everyone else.

Ashton and Luke set up lunch with Michael and Calum, invited them over. It felt better, doing it in their own home, in a place of comfort. Luke’s nervous though, has been since they got up that morning, got dressed. Luke’s put on another sundress for the day, opting to blur their gender lines again, on a day where it feels the most appropriate. 

Michael and Calum showed up about an hour again, bringing some fruit salad with them to lunch. Luke’s been trying to work up the courage throughout all of lunch, find a way to work it naturally into the conversation. There hasn’t been a time yet and the longer Luke waits, the more nervous they get. Ashton’s been wonderful, pressed close to Luke and squeezing their thigh to comfort them. It’s just about the end of lunch when Luke finally finds a natural place in the conversation to finally bring it up.

“I have something to tell you guys,” Luke says when the conversation dies down.

“You’re leaving Ashton for Troye Sivan,” Michael says, tone teasing.

“I’m not...what is that the first person you think of?” Luke asks. Michael shrugs.

“You’ve decided to leave the band to become a mime,” Calum chimes in, grinning.

“Okay, I’m never letting either of you guess ever again,” Luke says, swatting at Ashton as he continues to laugh with Michael and Calum.

“Alright, alright what did you want to tell us?” Michael asks, when he finally stops. Luke frowns, lump in their throat. Ashton reaches over, squeezing their hand. 

“I’m non-binary. Everyone’s gender expression for identifying is different, but for me it means that someday I feel masculine and comfortable being Luke and being male. Somedays, I feel more feminine. I don’t want to be a woman necessarily, but I want to be seen as more feminine. I want to be less gendered,” Luke says, swallowing, chest tight. Michael reaches across the table, holding his hand out palm up, signaling for Luke to take his hand. Luke reaches out, letting Michael grab their hand and squeeze.

“What can we do for you?” Calum asks.

“Some days I want to use he/him pronouns and some days I want to use they/them pronouns. I’ll start telling you guys in the morning how I feel, especially if we’re doing interviews or public appearances, so I don’t get misgendered or have anyone refer to me with gendered words. I don’t want to change my name, I like Luke. I just want to adjust how the world perceives me. And I don’t know how to come out online or what to say to our management,” Luke says. 

“Fuck management. You gotta do what’s important for you. Say whatever you want online, we’ll back you up,” Michael says, all determination and indignation. 

“But what about our fans? Or the online response? I still have to worry about that,” Luke points out.

“Fuck them if they don’t want to respect you. I don’t need those fans,” Calum says. Luke swallows trying to blink back their tears. Michael and Calum leave their seats, wrapping Luke up in a hug and pressing soft kisses to their head. Luke knows it’s not that simple, can’t just say fuck it to what management will think or how their fanbase will respond. Luke knows it can’t be simple, coming out, expressing their gender publicly. Maybe the first step is for Luke to change their pronouns on their twitter and instagram bios, letting the world find out as they check their page. Getting to see the fan reaction that way would be incredible, pouring out support for them and letting them know how valid they are without having to make a big declaration about it. Luke knows it’s going to be interviews and explanations, trying to talk to people about who they are, but it’s nice. The easy love and acceptance from their friends, knowing that no matter what, they have Ashton and Michael and Calum on their side. The world’s a little brighter for Luke, getting to be themselves, getting to be happy, getting to do it all with their friends. Right here, wrapped up in the guys and their hug, the world feels brighter and full of love and possibilities. 

[bisexualsforprompto]

If you’re still doing the jealous!Adrien headcanons, could you please do one with Garmari (BB/Marinette)? it’s my latest JAM and hnfhg its so c u t e

Jealous! Adrien Garmari Headcanons fic

Ummmm I got carried away?

Marinette opened her locket that was carefully placed on her mirror. Inside were two kids, almost unrecognizable after everything that happened and everything that came between them.

Marinette ran across the hot, sandy yard, panting when she finally reached her destination.

“I win!” Marinette called to an out of breath redhaired boy.

“Just you wait!” Gar panted, “One day I’m gonna be faster than you!”

“Yeah right!” Marinette laughed.

Marinette stared blankly at the locket. Seeing the redhaired boy with green eyes smiling face, she reached out to close it.

“We should get married!” Gar exclaimed as Marinette picked at the flowers around her. She thought about it for a moment.

“Okay!” She grinned, showing her missing two front teeth.

“Marinette Dupain-Chang will you marry me?” Garfield asked, offering a ring that he had fashioned out of flowers. Marinette giggled and slid the makeshift ring onto her small finger.

“I do!” Marinette exclaimed.

Marinette closed the locket abruptly, trying not to remember the last time she saw Gar. She didn’t even get to see him when he needed it most.

“Why not?!” 10 year old Marinette pleaded to her parents.

“Honey, you know we want to support him. It’s awful that such a tragedy happened to him. His parents were good people, they left too soon.” Sabine said averting her gaze, “But he’s deathly sick, we can’t risk you getting it too.”

“It’s not fair! I wanna see him!” Marinette stomped off upstairs.

She still regretted it. She didn’t hear about Gar again. She didn’t know what happened. For all she knew his sickness could’ve-

Marinette grabbed the locket off of her mirror and clasped it around her neck. She felt the urge to wear it, although, she hadn’t in almost eight years. She walked downstairs, Kaaliki and Tikki already in her bag.

“Are you excited for the trip today sweetie?” Sabine asked, handing her a bag of food. Marinette pulled her suitcase behind her,

“Yeah, it should be a fun four days.” Sabine noticed the locket around her neck.

“It’s been awhile since you’ve worn that.”

“Yeah, I guess so.” She said before embracing her mother, “Goodbye Maman.”

“Goodbye Marinette. Don’t forget to call!” Sabine exclaimed, but Marinette was already outside of the house.

Marinette ran down the street, the last thing she wanted was to miss the bus. And she knew they’d go without her.

She stepped onto the bus and saw Alya’s apologetic expression when she was sitting with Nino. The only empty space was next to Adrien.

Alya🦊: Sorry, girl. He insisted. I tried, but I didn’t want to make a scene.

Marinette sighed at the text and sat down next to Adrien.

Mari: It’s okay Al. It’s just until we get to the airport anyway.

It wasn’t though, when they got to the plane Adrien ended up sitting next to her. She was able to tune out his flirtations for the most part, but ever since they revealed identities as their superhero alter egos Marinette’s crush dissipated quickly and Adrien’s grew stronger.

She ended up trying to sleep in order to get him to leave her alone, and she drifted off.

She woke up when they landed and the memories of her dream came flooding at once. She dreamed about Garfield, something that happened occasionally, but this time it was different.

Most of her dreams about him were nightmares where her fear was confirmed and he had died along with his parents.

This one was more hopeful, she supposed, she saw Gar again, but really only his eyes, just the green. But then his green eyes morphed into Adrien’s.

And that was the end.

She was no Freud, she wasn’t even going to try to think about her bizarre dreams. She walked into the aisle and met up with Alya. Alya was able to save her from talking to Adrien, by leaving the blonde with Nino and taking Marinette by the hand and exiting the plane.

“Okay class!” Miss Bustier clapped, “We’re walking over to the studio now!”

A chorus of groans was heard from the class.

“Don’t complain! It’s only about a ten minute walk, let’s go!”

Marinette and Alya begun walking, Alya pointing out all the sights.

“That’s the Hollywood sign!” Alya squealed, “Maybe we can go to it later!” Marinette grinned and nodded. Alya was more interested in the culture of Hollywood and California than Marinette was, but the bluenette was looking forward to looking at the trending fashion!

“Oh you know I know the the lead actor of the movie we’re going behind the scenes to see today!” Lila remarked loudly. A cacophony of ‘wows’ and ‘that’s so cools’ was heard from the sheep in Bustier’s class. “I wasn’t going to say anything, but actually my connections with him were the reason we got to come on set today!”

Marinette and Alya rolled their eyes, they both knew that the reason they were going backstage was solely because of Marinette winning a contest for the class. They ignored Lila and talked with each other the rest of the way.

“Oh girl!” Alya had said when the studio came in view, “I don’t think I’ve seen you wear that locket before. It’s cute!”

“Thanks.” Marinette smiled, “It’s from awhile ago, my friend and I are in it.”

Alya knew not to pry when she saw the wistful expression on Marinette’s face. They rounded the bend and Miss Bustier scanned the security card she had been sent. The door opened for them and the class walked in.

The set was truly breathtaking, it was space themed and a large prop spaceship graced the center of it all. Marinette glanced around it all and saw the costumes. They were amazing and obviously hand stitched, but there were two missing from the rack. Marinette saw the director come to them.

“The actors will be out soon! unfortunately, only two were available today, but your lucky class will be able to see the lead of our movie!”

The class cheered, but Marinette was still focused on the costumes.

“Now which one of you sent in the contest entry?” The director asked. The class gave each other confused looks.

“It was Marinette, ma’am!” Alya said pointing to the bluenette.

“Oh wonderful!” She exclaimed, “Your entry was delightful! You’re truly a talented artist.” Marinette blushed.

“But Lila, I thought you-“

Rose was cut off by the starstruck Oohs and ahhs when the actors stepped out. They were in full costume, including their helmets that covered their entire face. The first actress removed her helmet.

“Hello all!” She said, “I’m Grace Kingsley! I play the female lead in the movie.”

“Hey!” Said the second voice. A voice Marinette recognized. She turned around from the director and saw the boy take off his helmet. She was met with familiar eyes.

“Oh my god.” She whispered underneath her breath. She made eye contact with him briefly. It couldn’t have been Gar, could it? He was green all over, and his red hair was replaced with green. The only thing that looked the same about him were his eyes.

“Marinette?” He gasped. Marinette gripped onto her locket.

“Gar?”

“Garfield Logan!” Chloé swooned.

Marinette stepped forward and Garfield ran over and embraced her.

“You two know each other?” Asked the director. Alya was awestruck.

“Yeah.” Gar said breathlessly.

“I’m so sorry.” Marinette cried as she hugged him tighter, “I wanted to be there, but-“

“It’s okay, I was sick.” Gar said, “I almost died if not for a blood transfusion, that’s why I’m green by the way, I wouldn’t want that to happen to you.”

“I still feel horrible, but ummm, on the subject...”

“You wanna talk about my greenness?” Gar laughed.

“It’s just a little different.” Marinette giggled.

“It’s Martian blood, I can actually shapeshift into any animal because of it. I’m a hero here, Beast Boy.” Marinette didn’t end up being too surprised, after all she’d trust Gar with a miraculous, “I guess I can be faster than you now.” He laughed.

Marinette gaped, “Wait a second! Why did you tell me all of this? Your secret identity-“

“Well when you’re green it’s kinda hard to have one.”

“I suppose you’re right.” Marinette relaxed.

“Wait!” Rose exclaimed, “Don’t you know Lila too?”

“Who?” Gar asked.

“Lila, she said she knew you.” Rose repeated.

“I’ve never met any Lilas sorry. Marinette is the only one I know in your class.” Gar said dryly. “Also, Mari, are you free tomorrow?”

Marinette nodded.

“Do you think we can catch up?” Gar asked nervously, “I can introduce you to the other Titans, maybe we can grab lunch too?”

“Are you asking me on a date Gar?” Marinette laughed.

“I guess I am.” Gar said going pink.

“Sure, we’re already married, right?” Marinette winked. Gar laughed and nodded.

“Seriously?” Adrien muttered. Everyone turned to him. “I mean, I’ve known you for years and when I ask you out you say no, but this random guy you’re saying yes to?”

“I’m not a random guy.” Garfield barked, “We’ve known each other since we were kids.”

“I’m so done with this.” Adrien gritted his teeth, “Come find me when you’ve come to your senses Bugaboo.”

Marinette rolled her eyes as Adrien stalked off and Miss Bustier ran after him.

“Sorry about him.”

“No need to apologize, I’ve met plenty of famous people like him. Entitled.” Gar scoffed, “So, tomorrow?”

“Tomorrow.”

~•~•~•~•~•~

Bonus:

Marinette walked into Titans Tower with Gar admiring the architecture.

“Welcome!” Garfield exclaimed as the elevator dinged.

“Beast Boy...who’s this?” Robin asked.

“My friend, Marinette. I’ve known her forever, you can trust her I promise.”

“Oh, it is the lovely to meet you!” Starfire grinned shaking Marinette’s hand frantically.

“You too.” Marinette laughed.

“Hey, I’m Cyborg.” Cyborg greeted, “BB has talked a lot about you.”

Marinette blushed, “Really?”

“Really.” Raven said looking up from her book, “Nice to meet you.”

“It’s nice to meet all of you too, I’m so happy I got to see Gar. It’s been so long and-“

A blaring alarm cut Marinette off.

“Titans! Trouble!” Robin yelled, the other Titans, save Garfield, fell into formation. “Down at the bank, we need to go now! It’s the HIVE.”

“I’m so sorry.” Gar sighed, “Can I drop her off?”

“Wait!” Marinette exclaimed. The team turned to face her, “Do you need help?”

“We shouldn’t get civilians involved, it’s dangerous.” Robin stated.

“Yeah, Mari, I really don’t want you to get hurt.” Gar said placing his hands on her shoulders, “You don’t have powers or any-“

“Spots on.” Marinette whispered, welcoming her transformation.

“Woah.” Cyborg yelled as Ladybug stood before him.

“Miraculous magic.” Raven assessed, “I thought I sensed magic off of you.”

“So...how do you feel about help now?”

Two weeks later the newest Titan from Paris was announced, and the talk of the community was the French superhero Ladybug who was dating Beast Boy.

And back in Paris a certain cat was furious, and plotting revenge.

Btw, this won’t be continued, sorry!

Taglist:

@northernbluetongue

@queen-of-the-trash-planet-tm

@luciferge

@legendaryneckjudgestudent

@interobanginyourmom

@beaversuenightly

@worlds-tiniest-spook-pastry

@mochinek0

@shamefullove

@emjrabbitwolf

@actual-disaster-human

@littleredrobinhoodlum

@elijahcoser

@daminett4life

@18-fandoms-unite-08

@kawaiigiantjudgefish

@myazael

@kass-is-weird

@dramatic-squirrel

@novicevoice

@abrx2002

@corabeth11

@mochegato

@the-fusionist

@lesscoolloki

@aegyobutpsycho2

@spiritofchaoticdreams

@shizukiryuu

@luleck

@moonystars14

@minightrose

[writeraquamarinara]

as with everything else in life, I’m late to making this post. I tend to make one around Jan 1st every year, but it’s now a few days after that, and all i can say for myself is that time is non-consequential during a pandemic, right? right.

anywho, this is my usual “thank you for keeping me going this year” post, but with even more fervor. 2020 would not have been nearly as tolerable without you all in it. and when i say all i really do mean all. thank you to anyone who follows me here or has read and supported my work on AO3 or has sent me a message or an ask or even just likes my posts. you can never know how many people’s hearts you’ve touched, lives you’ve made better, but i’m telling you now: you made me smile and laugh and feel love in a year that could have easily stolen all that. thank you for sticking around.

a few more specific shoutouts are under the cut to keep from flooding your dashes. i hope you’re all having a wonderful start to the new year.

much love, mari

to @anniemurphys: ria, i cannot thank you enough, for so many things. you played such a vital role in turning this year around for me. your friendship, and the friendships you’ve helped me make through book club, kept me smiling from week to week. i never wanted to leave our meetings, no matter how long they’d already gone. I could listen to your literary analyses and life advice for days on end. you’re such a kind, patient, loving person, and I’m so lucky to have you in my life. here’s to another year of freaking out over taylor swift albums and the power inherent in voluntarily turning oneself into vegetation.

to @bigdsgirl: heidi, you’re one of the sweetest, most hard-working people i know. you amaze me, and you graciously humor my latest hyper fixations—somehow always knowing, always reblogging content related to what i’m obsessing over at the moment. you give such great advice and have such a calming presence that i love being in chats and on calls with you. i cannot wait for more zoom movie nights in 2021.

to @hellodinoflower: raptor, you’ve supported me for so many years now, and whenever i feel down about my writing i’ll go back through the comments on some of my old fics and yours always make me tear up. you’re so thoughtful and kind and excited about my work that i cannot help but be the same. i hope you enjoyed the little dino reference in pride & publishing—i tried my best, i really did—and i hope you’re doing well. sending you so much love.

to @soyforramen: soy, i promise i’ll get to your head canon asks some day. i promise i haven’t forgotten them; i’m just uncreative and uninspired, but what else is new. you, however, are brilliant and kind and thoughtful, and your guidance in making both life and fic-writing decisions has been so important to me this year. wishing you so much luck with school this year, and even more happiness.

to @ithoughtyoulikedmereckless: rach, where to even begin? you’re the person i talk to when i’m feeling happy or sad or annoyed or angry or pretty much anything, really. our FaceTime convos are my favourite, no matter what time of day we have them at (somehow, the ones at 10pm are just as crazy as the ones at 3am, and i don’t really understand how or why, but i love that for us). i’ve learned so much about myself through my conversations with you, and you keep me level headed when i start doubting myself too much. you understand me on such an amazing level and i’m so lucky that you reached out to me so many years ago. i’m so lucky that we just happened to find each other on here and just so happened to move near each other this year. i still cannot believe i get to see you in person and go on walks in the woods with you. you’re such a talented photographer, writer, painter, baker, and all around artist; an incredibly kind and funny person; and i aspire to be you. i’m rambling now, but just know that i love you.

to @catthecoder: lav, my light, my love. seeing your icon and username on my dash makes me smile so hard. you just give off the best vibes and chatting with you always leaves me feeling like i’ve been basking in the sunlight for the past few hours. we need to make a resolution to sprint with each other more often this year, even if 2021 is going to be as hectic as ever, as i find so much joy in reading your snippets as we go along. you’re such a wonderful writer, and i often read your gift to me from years ago for inspiration and comfort. i hope you’re doing well and am sending so much love.

to @stirringsofconsciousness: stirrings!! i know you’ve had a super busy year, but you still made time to chat with me and i’ll be forever grateful. i often think about the advice you’ve left for me and the thoughtful responses you’ve given to my personal posts and find so much inspiration in your own words and actions. i also still cannot get over the time when you sent me a post of artful vases because you thought of me when you saw them. mortifying ordeal of being known who? anyways lol, i just wanted to thank you for being in my life and wish you a happy 2021.

to @heavy-lies-the-crown: alex, i just wanted to thank you for putting your time and energy towards answering my incessant questions this year. you’ve been an inspiration to me as a writer ever since i first found your work, but you’re also an inspiration to me as a person, and i’m always thinking about the advice you’ve given me. i hope you had a wonderful end to 2020, and that 2021 brings you even more joy than seeing your posts on my dash brings me. much love.

to @stonerbughead: maria, you brought so much happiness to my 2020. your support for my work took my breath away every time, and I swear I nearly cried when I saw your latest comments on pride and publishing. you put so much time and energy into this fandom, and into supporting the people in it, and I hope you know that it doesn’t go unnoticed. we all love you, and we’re so lucky to have you; your fics are brilliant, your podcast highlights are a joy to read, and your disdain for ras is hilarious. thank you for being you. sending lots of love.

to @sullypants: sully, it’s been years and i still marvel at how lucky i am to know you. you’ve taught me so much, from how to be more thoughtful to how to navigate therapy and self-love to how to be a kinder person in the world. you introduced me to ask polly and you send me really nice asks and you’re one of like four people who interacts with my posts on a consistent basis, which makes me feel a little less alone in the world, if that makes any sense. i’m going to stop myself from rambling on or else i might cry, but i just wanted to thank you for—here comes the cliche—changing my life (doesn’t everyone we meet change our lives, in some way or another? but you’ve changed mine considerably, and for the better). sending you so much love (in the form of both yellow and blue heart emojis)

to @justcourbeau: mel, our paths cross less frequently now than they used to, but that doesn’t mean i don’t think about you and the conversations we’ve had, or smile when i come across your posts on my dash, or when i happen to open up instagram once in a blue moon and see you’ve posted on your story. please never stop sending me sparknotes memes—especially cask of amontillado ones. your words of advice from the night i called you, distraught, a few years ago live in my brain rent free, and i will continue to carry them into 2021 with me. i hope 2021 treats you well, and that you achieve all you want and more. sending you an immense amount of love.

to @protectorofthesmoll: your string of comments on pride and publishing made me cry multiple times, i swear. i still read them back every so often, when i’m trying to muster the courage to start up on the new chapter. your support means so much to me, and it amazes me how far back it goes: I’m pretty sure I have at least two asks of yours sitting in my inbox, from back in 2018 when I had barely any followers or supporters, both of them writing prompts that I never filled. i promise i’ll get to them one day. anywho, i just wanted to thank you for your support this year, and every year before that. wishing you so much love and happiness in 2021.

to @panalegs27: 2020 was the year of figuring out that we have so much in common: a hatred of dating apps, confusion over tumblr’s obsession with the raven cycle, and an attraction to logan lerman with gray hair. thank you for chatting about all of these things, and more, with me; seeing that you’ve sent me a post always makes me smile, and our conversations make me laugh. wishing you even more love and laughter in 2021.

to @indiebughead: maria, it’s been so lovely getting to know you more over the course of this year. i love listening to your stories and living vicariously through you, lol. (i want updates on new neighbor boy, asap!) thank you for listening to my petty rants and for encouraging me to make bad decisions and be salty on main when i want to be. i couldn’t have asked for a more supportive conspirer ;) sending lots of love.

to @redundantoxymorons: iz, you’re one of the smartest, most eloquent, most supportive people i know. i know 2021 will be both stressful and exciting in many ways, and i wish you all the best. i know you’re going to thrive wherever you end up, and i’ll cheer you on as you navigate this new world, just as you’ve done for me all these years. i’m so lucky to have you as a friend, supporter, and beta, and all of our conversations bring me so much joy. pls continue to gush about taylor swift and rec books and send uquizzes with results that make me feel Known in 2021. i love you very much <3

to @cracklr: leda, i’ve missed your passive aggressive smiley faces, but your gushing insta comment more than made up for that, i promise :) sending you so much love and happiness in this new year <3

to @dottie-wan-kenobi: dottie, the posts we send each other make me so upset, but in a good way—the “if i just had to see this nasty shit then so do you” kind of way—and i love that about our relationship. who else would understand how disgustingly hilarious something is other than my wife? no one, that’s who. i often think about how you were the first friend i made in fandom, and i’ll be forever grateful for that: i couldn’t have found a better person. i love you so much, and am sending you all my love.

this list of shoutouts is really much shorter than it should be, but my brain is currently friend and i cannot seem to think properly anymore. therefore, i’m going to call it a day and reiterate my above statements that I love you all, and I hope you have a fucking amazing 2021.

[winryofresembool]

Things We Lost in the Fire, ch 27

aka Caleo uni au

Fic summary: Calypso starts studying at a new university, but to her annoyance her new flatmate is a loud mouthed mechanic who also likes to sneak his dog in whenever. But as she learns to know him better, she realizes they might have more in common than what she first thought. Eventually, even the darkest secrets come out…

Chapter summary: The exam season is underway (yet somehow I don’t mention the exams all too many times...)

A/N: Yay, I'm back with this fic!! I think I can promise a bit more regular updates at least in the near future, but I will be starting to work longer hours possibly starting from next week so I will have a bit less free time then. I am still determined to keep up with my 500ish words per day goal so it should cause too much delay!

That's that, I hope you guys are as happy to return to this universe as I am! As usual, please let me know what you think :) This fic is about to take my longest fic position from Love Can Melt the Ice, so knowing that there are people who care about it really means a lot to me!

Words: 2393

Genre: romance & hurt/comfort

Warnings: none

previous chapter / AO3

Leo would have been lying if he had claimed that everything went back to completely normal after the talk with Calypso. Sure, they both really tried harder to act as neutral and friendly as possible around each other; whenever they were at home at the same time, they chatted casually about how things were going at work and at the university, their latest TV show or music discoveries, or some silly thing one of their friends had said or done recently. Sometimes they even watched something together or cleaned the common area together. However, the earlier confessions were never mentioned. On the surface things were ‘just fine’, but the unspoken words and lingering looks spoke for itself. Leo knew things were still heating up under the surface and sooner or later they would have to make some difficult decisions. But until then, he wasn’t going to risk anything by disrespecting the guidelines that they had set during their ‘big talk’, even if it was hard to resist sometimes.

One evening Leo found Calypso studying for her upcoming exams on the common area couch. She was wearing a pink, tunic length sweater that matched her lip color, and black leggings that hugged her legs tightly (not that he’d ever tell her that he had noticed such things). She had also pulled her now medium length hair into a messy ponytail so it wouldn’t bother her while she was reading, showing her nicely shaped facial features better. Despite noticing all that, Leo’s thoughts soon went to the facts that he had recently learned about his flatmate. Now he knew more about the hardships she had gone through; a dead sister, an abusive, controlling father, being alone all those years and the nightmares she had mentioned while drunk. Yet, somehow there she was, having escaped her father’s grip and looking perfectly content doing something as boring and normal as studying for exams. The girl was way stronger than he had earlier given her credit for, and Leo admired her capability to stay so calm; he wasn’t so sure the ghosts of his own past would leave him alone that easily.

“Hi,” he finally said before Calypso noticed that he’d been standing there just watching her far too long despite the rules they had set. “What are you reading?”

Calypso showed him the book. If she was surprised to see him, she hid it well. “A collage of Frenchmen’s experiences at the front lines during World War II. I know. A very cheerful way to finish the day.” She grimaced.

“Huh? I thought you were mostly focusing on older history? I didn’t know you study that stuff too,” Leo noted, shifting from one foot to another.

“Well, they do require us to have a good enough understanding of the newer events as well,” Calypso replied, now looking at him directly. For some reason that one look managed to make chills go down Leo’s spine. “It is true, though, that I am more interested in ancient history. There’s so much we still don’t know about those times and I want to be able to discover more.”

“I see,” Leo said. “I think I understand what you mean. I am constantly hoping to discover new ways to create things that will be useful for all of us. Flying dragons that use energy drinks as their energy source? How epic would that be?” Excitement surged through him when he simply thought about it.

“Isn’t that a bit out there?” Calypso asked, but Leo didn’t miss the amused glint in her eyes. “And what if everyone had flying dragons and that would cause horrible air accidents? I don’t know about you but to me they don’t sound very safe.”

“Sunshine, what’s life without some danger?” Leo questioned.

“Hmm, let me think: safe?” Calypso retorted.

“Ouch. Well, I don’t think I have time to invent flying dragons any time soon, so you don’t have to worry about that,” Leo reassured her, but now that the idea had been planted into his head, he decided to return to it some day in the future. Hopefully when he would be able to handle fire.

“That’s a relief,” Calypso replied. “Speaking of your inventions… have you decided what you’re going to do about your studies? The last time I asked you said you haven’t been in contact with your professor yet.”

That was a question Leo had been dreading for. He preferred to not talk about that topic unless he had to, but the truth was that he was still quite unsure about being able to continue. However, he hadn’t made any final decisions yet.

“I’ll… I’ll keep working to overcome my fear,” he responded vaguely. “I think I’ve made some small progress during our sessions. If I can keep that going, I may be able to retake the test next year. Small steps, you know.” In reality, so far he had managed to stay close to a small, burning candle for a short period of time without freaking out, but he still didn’t want to try the matches whenever Calypso suggested it. There was still a long way to go before he’d be able to use all the machines he needed during lab classes and at work.

“Okay,” Calypso said, but to Leo she sounded a bit unconvinced. Her voice got more reassuring, though, when she added: “You know that you can ask for my help any time you need it.”

“Yeah, thanks.” Leo nodded. “And same right back at you. I mean, you can ask me. If you need anything.” For some annoying reason he managed to only get stuttering out of his mouth at that moment. “Even if you simply want me to make you a miniature dragon in the middle of the night. It’s fine. I’d totally make it.”

“And why would I want you to make me a miniature dragon in the middle of the night?” Calypso looked at him questioningly. Before Leo managed to answer, her face softened into a smile and she added: “I really appreciate the thought, though. It feels so different… in a good way… to have people in my life who genuinely support me. I haven’t had that, well, since I got separated from my mom.”

She sat a bit straighter on the couch, her gaze going back and front between Leo and her book, and Leo wondered if she was debating if she should reach for him and touch his shoulder or something. Maybe even hug. One side of him wished she would just go for it. But that would have violated their newly made rules and neither wanted to make things even more complicated than they already were. They simply kept staring at each other for a while, as if trying to read each other’s thoughts, but finally Calypso sighed and turned her focus back on her book, closing it.

“I didn’t realize it’s already this late…” She said, adjusting her hair a bit with the hand that wasn’t holding the book. “I still need to finish an assignment for tomorrow.”

She stood up and started walking towards her room, but when she got past Leo, her arm briefly touched his. Leo’s arm was still tingling after Calypso closed the door behind her.

…

A few days later, Leo was still thinking of that incident when he almost fell over a big rock that was standing on his road. He and Jason were currently having a well deserved evening off after finishing their last exams of the semester earlier that day (Leo felt like he had at least succeeded with the calculations but his essay writing was a bit sloppy) and in honor of that they had decided to go for a long jog and after that have a big, unhealthy meal in one of their favorite pizza places. While they were on their way there, Jason had been explaining something about his holiday plans when Leo had zoned out, and Jason had to grab his arm so he didn’t fall.

“Hey, man, you OK?” Jason asked, frowning. “What just happened there?”

“Yeah, yeah. I’m OK.” Leo brushed some dust off the sleeves of his coat. “I was just… thinking. And didn’t notice the rock on the road.”

“Hmmm, what got you that thoughtful?” Jason inquired. “I bet you didn’t even hear what I just said.”

“You know I have a pretty nasty case of ADHD, sometimes I just zone out randomly,” Leo said defensively, not wanting to admit aloud that recently he had been even more distracted than usual because of a certain flatmate of his. “And no, I didn’t hear you.”

“Alright,” Jason shrugged. “I was telling you that Piper’s dad has invited us to visit him over the break. I’m not sure yet if we are going, though. Piper didn’t seem very enthusiastic about it. Sure, she wants to see him, but she suspects he’s still working most of the time so it would be the same to just call instead of traveling all the way to LA.”

“Mmmh,” Leo mumbled, trying hard to stay in the present moment. “I’m going to be at Waystation during the break so if you guys decide to stay, we can still hang out.”

“Okay, I’ll let you know what we decide to do. That wasn’t all, though…” Jason continued, his face becoming concerned. “I think Piper has seemed quite distant lately, and not just when we’ve been talking about that trip. Sometimes I worry that she’s gotten bored of me, or something.”

“No way, man!” Leo exclaimed. “I’ve seen you guys together often enough to know that she loves you. Maybe she’s just going through a rough phase or something.”

Jason didn’t seem quite convinced. “I guess so. It’s just that usually she tells me directly what’s bothering her. This… keeping things inside her isn’t like her.”

“Maybe you just need to give her some time,” Leo suggested. “It’s like me with Cal; I’ve learned to keep my mouth shut more often and in exchange she has slowly started opening up to me more recently.”

“She has? That’s great!” Jason cheered up. “How is it going with you two anyway? I heard some things about the Halloween party aftermath…”

“Nothing happened after the party!” Leo yelped, raising his hands. “Whatever Piper has told you, all lies.”

“Really? So you two wouldn’t have kissed if Piper hadn’t interrupted you guys?” Jason raised his eyebrow.

If Leo’s cheeks hadn’t already been red from the jogging, he certainly would have blushed. “Um… well… the point is that we didn’t. Besides, we’ve set some rules that we’re supposed to follow because we don’t wanna make our co living too complicated.”

“So there is something going on between you two and you are acknowledging it,” Jason teased. “You wouldn’t need to set any rules otherwise.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Leo muttered. “If you must know, we did admit that we like each other after the party.”

“But that’s great!” Jason exclaimed.

“It feels pretty crazy,” Leo replied. “Sometimes I wonder why she likes me, but maybe the Bad Boy Supreme’s magic is stronger than I thought.”

Jason snorted at his comment. “I don’t know Calypso as well as you do but I doubt it’s the so-called Bad Boy Supreme side that she cares about. You pretend to be all cool and try to seem like you don’t care about what’s happening around you but I think you do that only because you care too much. Maybe Calypso has noticed that as well.”

“Dude, you’ve been hanging out with Piper too much.” Leo shook his head. “That’s something she would say. ” “Well, she’s not wrong. Anyway, what happened after the big confession?”Jason asked curiously.

“We’re not together if that’s what you’re asking, ” Leo denied immediately. “I just mentioned the rules, remember? We wouldn’t need them if we had decided to go down that road.” “Ouch… but why? Why didn’t you just decide to do it?” Jason wanted to know.

“For some stupid, noble reasons,” Leo grunted. “I’m not gonna go into the details because it’s up to her to talk about it, but long story short, she thinks it’s safer that way. I think she’s afraid of hurting one of us.”

“And do you think she’s right?” Jason inquired.

“I… No! I’ve told her I can handle it. But I’m not gonna push it - believe me, Jo and Emmie have given me long lectures about respecting women’s boundaries. If Cal and I wanna keep living together, I have to let it be.”

“Yeah, I can see your point.” Jason nodded.

“Besides…” Leo added after a moment, his face falling as he thought about his past. “Bad things tend to follow me. Who is to say that I wouldn’t be the one getting her into trouble?”

“Why do you think that?”

“Because when have I ever been successful with anything I’ve done?” Leo asked in return.

Jason seemed to finally understand what event Leo was really referring to. “You’re still beating yourself for things that happened years ago?”

“Why do you think I’m not capable of going to some of the lab classes? Because I simply think that skipping is fun and I don’t care whether I pass it or not?” There had been a time when Leo hadn’t cared about his school success, but back in those days he hadn’t cared about much else either. Now that he had dreams and things to live for, he hated the idea that anyone would think he’d throw it all away just because he could. His new family deserved better than that for what they had done for him.

“No, no, I was not thinking that! You just never talk about it so I assumed… whatever.” Jason didn’t want to make Leo even angrier so he decided it was better to change the topic. “Maybe we should talk about something else. I still hope that you and Cal will work it out eventually.”

“Yeah. I hope so too. Same for you and Piper.” The friends had gotten close to their destination, so Leo exclaimed quickly: “Hey, I’m smelling the pizza now! Whoever is last at the door pays!”

“That’s a bad deal because you know I’m faster than you. I train every day!” Jason pointed out but soon sprinted after him.

[englandsgray]

Sherlolly Self-Interviews 2020

Well hi 👋

Ignoring the internal image of Gilderoy Lockheart smiling smugly while flashbulbs pop and saying ‘In my autobiography, Magical Me...’ 🙈😆 I shall take the opportunity of this lovely event to introduce myself as a writer of Sherlolly fanfiction on AO3...

I am English and somewhere over 30.  I watched the show as it aired, and lost my heart as quickly to Molly Hooper as to Sherlock Holmes.  The kiss is British television history.  Series 4 is my favourite.  Moriarty on the beach is life.  The Holmes brothers break my heart every time.

I am extremely lucky to have been provided some questions to answer here by @ohaine and @mybrainrots - huge, huge love and thanks to these two lovelies, and not just for this.  I admire you both so much as writers, and your support means the world to me ❤️ Thanks too, to @sherlollyappreciationweek!

Where did you begin to write, and have you written for other fandoms?  I wrote my first fanfic when I was eleven years old - a 100 page ramble about The Monkees.  Oh yes.  Then in 2018, I fell for the characters of the Disney Pixar film Cars and began writing and publishing.  So far so random!  Writing in this fandom sprang from binge-watching all four series of Sherlock during lockdown.  I remembered reading Louise Brealey talking about being disappointed Molly didn’t get chance to ‘roundly kick Sherlock’s arse’ and agreeing with her wholeheartedly.  That, over a few weeks, turned into my first fic - Who You Really Are.  

You’re a recent (and welcome!) arrival to the Sherlolly ship, and I was wondering if writing in an established, less active than it used to be fandom has been a challenge?   Thank you, firstly.  My experience of this fandom has been incredibly positive - the sense of welcome has been wonderful.  I will admit I was terrified posting the first fic - there are hundreds of times more stories posted daily in the Sherlock fandom as in the one I had some experience of.  But I needn’t have worried, it’s been a blast.  I will also admit, that it’s no small thing to be surrounded by such brilliant writing and the long-standing passion which goes with it.  But I find that inspiring in itself, and I’m very glad to be here - how supportive the fandom are makes me feel like I always have been!       

What’s your favourite place and way to write?  My aesthetic is Lin-Manuel Miranda in his in-law’s laundry room 🤣 I wrote my first ten-thousand words on the notes app on my phone before my other half told me to stop being ridiculous!  I switch between the laptop, my phone and longhand (I’m a sucker for a nice notepad and a Uni-Ball Eye) and, more often than not, not sat up properly at a table.   

Since you’ve (done something I’ve never managed successfully and) written a novella length fic... how did you organise/keep track of all the details and where you wanted the story to go?  Did you outline/plot in advance?  First of all - I would love to see a novella length fic from you @mybrainrots!  The final scene of Who You Really Are came to me very early on and I knew I wanted the fic to fit within TFP - a lot of it takes place in the timeframe of the final montage.  At first, it was going to be much more about Sherlock’s relationship with the ideas of sentiment and love (the phrase ‘I’m not sentimental about you, I love you,’ haunted me for a while) and I spent some time researching the psychology and playing with scenes from throughout the series - one of my favourites I didn’t go on to use was inspired by the final scene of THoB.  Using scenes from the canon gave an automatic structure, and I was always aiming for the final one I wrote early on - the two of them on the beach (everything is about the beach, with me!)  As I went along and started, inevitably, to slow down, I mapped out the chapters with a short note of what I wanted to be in each, then would add notes or phrases as they came to me - often emailed from my phone!  I had to force myself through a tricky section set in Baker Street at one point, but it came together in the end.  I did plot The Pathologist’s Skeletons on paper first, as I found with a casefic which remains a WIP, that I can get confused and lose focus when it comes to details and how to reveal them in a way which stays paced and interesting.  I’ll certainly do that from now on with longer stories and cases.  How did you keep up enthusiasm for the work?  I want to write an original novel, so I am forcing myself to work through the knotty bits and blocks as a learning experience.  Not everything is destined to be finished or finessed, of course, but I’m finding this process is building my confidence that I can overcome problems and slow periods.  I also find I know when I need some external inspiration - some of my favourite scenes have come to me while out walking the dog or sitting on the beach.  I’ve also been inspired by books or other series or things going on in the world, as we all are, and sometimes that’s pushed me on.  Plus, of course, I’m a newbie - I’m very much in the honeymoon period of my writing, even though I’ve loved Sherlock for ten years! (Ten years! Bonkers.) 

You’ve got a knack for writing Sherlock’s thoughts and capturing his voice.  That said, which character do you find easiest to write?  Which is the hardest?  Thank you so much.  I absolutely love writing Sherlock and Mycroft, and I’m sure that’s because they suit my somewhat over-the-top writing style!  I find Molly and her POV really difficult.  I want the scenes I write from her perspective to sound completely different to Sherlock, but that means writing in a style which doesn’t come as naturally to me.  I’m a long way off happy with that at the moment, but I’m enjoying the challenge.

Is there a scene or character that specifically inspired you to start writing Sherlolly?  The whole of TFP, but especially from the moment Sherlock arrives at Musgrave onwards.  I am desperate to see what a Sherlock Holmes who has been reacquainted with his own heart would look like.  I find his emotionality in those final scenes hugely compelling (Mycroft’s office is one of my favourite moments from across all four series) and, as I have always believed in him and Molly, I practically jumped up back in May after watching it and said ‘right, where’s my notebook?!’.

There’s a lovely peaceful, quiet feeling to your fic ‘We’re All Right At The Moment’.  Can you tell us what inspired it and if you’ve thought of doing the backstory that goes with it?  Thank you!  Like everyone, I would go back to January of this year and start again in a heartbeat, but I am hugely fortunate to be able to say that I have a lot to be grateful to the UK lockdowns for.  I might never have begun writing in this fandom otherwise, for one, and I have had a brilliant time so far and met some lovely people. Honestly, I don’t feel able to do any sort of justice in my writing to what has happened in the world in any broader sense than drawing on my own experiences of staying at home and enjoying my family.  This particular super-short fic sees Molly cutting Sherlock’s hair at home in Baker Street.  I wrote it in the evening after I had cut my other half’s hair and had been reminding myself that despite how horribly worried I was - and still am - about everything, we were all right in that moment, and to focus on that as much as possible.  I wanted to try to capture that, if for no reason other than to look back on this entire experience and remember something lovely, so I am so pleased to hear you felt the fic did that.  It was only after I finished it and reread it, that I realised it is ambiguous as to whether Molly is worried about Sherlock contracting the virus, or whether she is remembering him being treated for it... As I say, I don’t think I could write more about these extraordinary circumstances - perhaps it’s just too close at the moment - so I don’t plan on extending it.  But you know how it is, the plot bunnies hop where they will... 

Do you have a Sherlolly music playlist?  What are your top five favs from the list? Here’s a run down of (6 🙊) songs I have been getting emotional over in the last little while, leading my brain to assign their significance to my favourite couple...

Kissing You - Des’Ree - It’s so 90′s, it’s a bit cheesy, it’s oddly disturbing.  It helped me write A Request, Made Properly, and that gave me an excuse to have Sherlock kiss Molly in the snow.

How Long Will I Love You? - Ellie Goulding - part of the playlist, but also in remembrance of a friend who passed away recently.  Life is very short, love is forever.

High and Dry - Jamie Cullum - It’s made me emotional for a very long time.  The original is my partner’s version of choice, this is mine.  

Think About You - Delta Goodrem - Okay, this one isn’t emotional, and it’s not my usual vibe!  Blame the zoom exercise class I do!  But oh my goodness, it’s Molly.  Bless her.

Blinded By Your Grace (P.T.2. F.T. MNEK) - Stormzy - One of the best ever, I reckon.  Spent an awful lot of time thinking about angels and demons, grace and what it takes to save someone, while writing my latest - The Pathologist’s Skeletons.  This has been in my head most of the (blimmin’) time!

Love Me Like You Do - Ellie Goulding - I didn’t know I was a fan of Ellie until I wrote this list... I don’t subscribe to the theory that the love Molly wants or that which Sherlock has to offer is any lesser because it isn’t ‘normal’ or expected. I don’t think romantic entanglement would come easy to either of them. But it’s still love and it would be beautiful.

Thank you so much for reading.  Thanks and love to @ohaine and @mybrainrots. And thank you @sherlollyappreciationweek for the event and for everything you do ❤️

Feel like I should sign off with a quote from the show...

“You’re not a puzzle-solver, you never have been. You’re a drama queen!” Dr John Watson (Moffat & Gatiss) 2014 😜

X

A fav fic of mine by @mybrainrots

https://archiveofourown.org/works/7563193

A fav fic of mine by @ohaine

https://archiveofourown.org/works/10562904

My stuff:

https://archiveofourown.org/users/EnglandsGray/works

[shinescape]

writer ask game! tagged by @hello-kumamimi, thank you for the tag mimi!

tagging @poeticnotions 💛

1. what fandoms have you written for (but do not currently)?

I' ve written for bts before but not anymore. As for other groups that I write but is not on this blog would be Got7, Astro, Stray Kids, SF9, etc.

2. what fandoms are you currently writing for?

Currently writing for ateez, exo, nct, wayv, seventeen and the boyz. Will probably add more group to write for this blog in the future.

3. how long have you been writing?

For quite a long time, since 2011 ish if i'm not mistaken. But I never posted any stories until 2014 which was on AFF then I stopped posting and only started posting back when I started this blog which was April 2021. Basically I never stop writing just never share them to the world haha

4. on which platforms do you post your stories?

Only on Tumblr

5. what is your favorite genre to write?

I love writing angst and fluff but I mostly write romance which is a given considering the audience love it hehehe.

6. are you a pantser or a planner?

It depends but I mostly plan things out if it's a request. If it's not then I just write them out like the latest imagine 3 am

7. one shot or multi-chapter?

I used to write chaptered fics back in the days but I never get to finish even one and got kind of anxious about writing them thus why I take a lot of time when asked for a part 2 for my oneshots. So I prefers oneshots.

8. what is the perfect chapter length in your opinion?

I really enjoy reading long fics that can go up to 10-20k words. I also think that short (3-5k) multi chaptered fics are nice too. But I can't write that long just love reading them.

9. what is your longest published story? is it complete?

It's my poly vampire oneshot that was requested! I love the fact that I made the story flow nicely (for once) and it was my first take on a poly vampire story too. Here's the story for anyone curious. For Eternal

10. which story did you enjoy working on the most?

This was requested by @hello-kumamimi and honestly I enjoyed writing this eventho it got angsty at some point but I made sure the ending was fluff and decent. It's a Xiumin oneshot which you can read it here if interested.

11. favourite request you have written and why(if any)?

There's so many because I got a lot of unique requests but since I have to choose it would be Hawk Eyes! It got the most notes too which I would never expected and it made me so happy I literally smiled the whole day. Thank you!

12. are there reoccurring themes in your stories?

Romance! and slowly but surely suggestive themes that I hope won't burst more in the future hahaha

13. current number of wips(works in progress)?

Currently there's 8. I should really work on them now.

14. three things you have noticed about your own writing.

Typos. Typos everywhere even after i proof read them like 10 times. I apologise for that and will get to it once I have the time. I feel that my sentences sounds childish or simple? It's been awhile since I write regularly so yeah. Last thing would be how I just love to end stories with the characters in bed (tmi, sleeping is my hobby explains why hahaha). Tbh, I'm bad at ending thus why i am asked for part 2 a lot or end the stoies with dialogues. Will work on this more..

15. a quote you like from a published story.

“I don’t know what is going on in his head but I promise I’ll come back for you. You remember that, okay?” - Wooyoung (For Eternal) I actually teared up writing that line.

16. a quote from an unpublished story.

“If you keep staring like that, she’s going to get upset again.”

17. space for you to say something to your readers

Hi there, it's Ara! I was really worried and anxious about starting this writing blog but after getting a lot of support from irl people who has read my works, I finally did it!

I would like to thank every one of you who follow and read my works and take the time to like, reblog and comment and even put tags on them. Also to the one who send in asks about the stories I've written, love you too! I really really love interacting with all of you and especially my followers and mutuals. I hope we get to talk more often ^^

I'm very thankful to those who follow this blog of mine I will do my best in the future. Thank you for your support 💕