#also the group name crying
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ooouuu
me: is depressed
my twt acc: suspended
r u next finale: jiwoo jeemin jeongeun (aka the talented girlies) all eliminated and 2 minors in the lineup 🤕🤕
#real talk: wanna kms rn#life isn’t living#first two aren’t new developments but the third??#oh belift/hybe are going to hell bcs they love being sleazy 😍#aside from them already eliminating the star of all stars miss chanelle thomas i actually can’t believe they’d let go of jiwoo and jeemin#of all people 😭😭#like#you have an incredible main vocalist who can actually sing and erm lbr hybe needs more idols who can yk actually sing#and LITERALLY THEIR BEST TRAINEE?? jeemin has been consistently topping the rankings every time and 4th place for the finale was good !! but#of course the stupid and frankly disgusting 70% votes for koreans vs the 30% for intls skewed the scale so badly#and when u add in the fact that only 2 of the finalists were audience picks and the other 4 were the company picks … 🫤🫤🫤#also the group name crying#what the fuck is i’ll-it 😭#that’s a HORRIBLR NAME#and i though the name for queendom puzzle was bad#i mean it still is but this is js 🤐#when the announced it i suddenly felt relieved that chanelle and tripl j were debuting under that group name 😋🫶#but it’s the way i was so blindsided by jeemin not debuting BYE like the anger i feel rn …#jiwoo?? my bbg has more talent in her pink than the bitch lee hyun has in his entire nasty body#but the way the show has been going clued me in on that she most likely wouldn’t make it bcs bitches love being ageist and ignoring talent#BUT JEEMIN?? SHE DESERVED BETTER 😣😣😣#they’re all most likely leaving hybe too good riddance#laughing at the way most intl fans are wishing on the groups downfall calling them flops like they’re MAD#and rightfully so like bye hybe ur debuting a bunch of flops aside from yunah and minju my beloveds 😘#i wish them all the success but yk#i won’t even talk abt W bcs her fans r probably lurking on here 🤕😭#need jaden jeong to hook up my girlies w triple s !! they’ll make good music and show off their skills#crying again cbs the way jiwoo said this was her last chance most likely for a debut … i’m burning hybe down idc idc#fuckers need a good vocalists and yet they’re not running after the lost opportunity ??#screw the judges too except aiku bcs they rlly realized how much they fumbled the bag at the finale LMAO
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Narinder after Aym and Baal move out
#these guys are best friends actually#cotl fanart#cotl narinder#cult of the lamb#cotl lamb#doom and shroom#yellow cat#cotl ruri#leshycat#specifically ruri and nari#they sit have tea parties and gossip on Sundays#the lamb has two hands#the lamb also has a type..#leshycat got adopted into the friend group#what the heck is leshycats name#I keep calling him leshycat idk what to call him#crying
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So okay I know I was literally just whining about school a bunch but it is definitely awesome to get to see all my (and I do have some, believe it or not) friends again! The one I was worried about was actually super chill so I think it’s fine now lol. She does have beef with my other friends though and she does still hate the friend I maybe sorta have a tiny crush on.
(Okay so that friend that I might have a crush on held my hand today when we were walking to English class and I stg I was moments away from spontaneously combusting.)
(Ignore the messy drawing lol)
She’ll be yapping about something that annoyed her meanwhile I am no longer breathing and by some miracle she remains completely oblivious.
She keeps doing stuff like this and that’s why we had so many dating allegations last year lmfao
#Okay so she has told me to my face that her type is tall strong girls#And I mean.#I’m 6ft.#I lift.#Soooo….. I’m her type?????#She’s a dance major and last year she choreographed a dance (with a group of eight dancers) as a school project#But she dedicated it to me which like#Did make me cry bc it was a really beautiful dance and so sweet of her#She also made me these super super pretty bracelets#With mushrooms and Celtic knots and purple and green beads#Plus she keeps calling me pet names#And we have gone on dates but not real dates just as friends#I just feel like if she like liked me than she’d be more nervous right?#But she’s super confident and stuff#i don’t know#Someone help me#how do you know if a girl likes you or not#Oh and sometimes she’ll just show up to school with my fav flavour of energy drink for me#Like I don’t even have to ask she’s so nice#help me#Is she just a close friend who likes holding my hand and braiding my hair or are we dating I genuinely don’t know
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i had a great time at the hicksville grand reopening! extra thank you to everyone who said hi to me today, everyone there was so nice 💖 can't wait to visit this stage many, many, many more times in the future!
(also expect footage up on youtube soon 👀)
#juno.txt#cec#chuck e cheese#the district(?) manager (chuck is hugging her in the 2nd pic) gave a speech before the balloon drop#and commended the fans for fighting so hard to keep hicksville around and i was like YEAAAAAAAAAA HICKSVILLE YEAAAAHHHHHHH#i love this stage so fucking MUCH dude i cant describe how happy i am that it gets to stick around#they played every boy every girl and im barely familiar w that song so idk if they changed the lyrics for the event but#there was a bit in it about like. staying and continuing to make music and it had me almost crying in front of everyone ghdjg#it has me almost crying now lol im just so happy#also also also. matt sam tyler jack specifically as well as the group of kids i saw leaving who i didnt get the names of:#thank you for saying hello u were all so sweet esp matt and ur family yall were total angels#ok im gonna stop rambling in the tags i just love animatronics and the fandom hehe
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it's so hard to portray bullying tbh because it's such a complex thing. like you have to make the bullies three dimensional but you can't make them too sympathetic or it takes away from their cruelty. oh wow post cancelled remember when people said bully x victim enemies to lovers glorifies abuse?
#(grinning) I dated my irl bully and it was uneventful lol#apart from giving me like a superiority complex#to be fair it was already former bully turned friend beforehand which is strange enough in and of itself#also not my worst bully but definitely someone whose face I remember in some dark memories of 5th grade#my kbjectivelz worst bully didn't even affect me that much bc he was quite obviously also just obsessed with me#he would frequently @ me in the class group chat just to force me to talk to him for no reason#would pick fights with me and enjoy when I fought back#and once completely stopped dead in his tracks and comforted me when he was gonna insult me and I started crying and said#that my hamster died the previous night (truth)#it was so funny still no idea what's up with him? he left my school a few years before graduation and every time I'd see him in public#he'd still call out my name..It's just funny because I was mostly invisible to most of my classmates. A small nuisance at the worst to the#but he acted like I was the center of his school life loool so in love
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very normal conversation i started last night while having an existential crisis
#wtf do i tag this as#feet#discord#freinds#group chat#im grasping at straws#real girls remove names from their group chat screenshots using ms paint#the queen of art software#i was gonna say the pills aren't working but i didn't cry#so maybe they are just not enough#you love to see it#also all of my contacts are pictures of pikmin#pikmin#bc they are#i thought it was funny okay#and it still is#anyways i have to go back to wrestling the queue bc i do not like it
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Honestly, the way Kipperlilly dealt with her anger issues makes me feel a whole lot better about how I dealt (or didn't) with mine.
#no I wasn't calling you a fat cow#I was talking about your friend#mostly crying to be honest#but also one time I bitched about one of my classmates on twitter and called her a fat cow#but didn't use her name#and then another person in her friendship group thought it was about them#and I couldn't explain#but this was two weeks before the end of school so it was fine#then I never saw them again
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YAMATO NEW NAKAMA PLEASE 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🧎🏻♀️🧎🏻♀️🧎🏻♀️🧎🏻♀️LUFFY PLEASE!!!!
#do kaido and big mom end up in the same hole??? lmaoo yamato get luffy!!! hell yes!!!#now a military trial for all the beast pirates come on!!! everyone to udon jail#APOO IS STILL ALIVE???. FUCK OFF!!!!!!!#i understand law is not on a state to be a medic but marco.... pick up some slack....#toko :((( no fucking way they are coming out of the hole..... they aren't.... the better not....#HIYORI!!!! no reunion??? :((#tama first girl to adopt a mother... also why do they have the same eyes... also is nami not enough for you.... or luffy.... your uncle...#hiyori girl dont kneel.... thats your 8 year old brother.... tama backstory omg.... tama dont cry omg.... she's gonna make me cry too...#izo is dead for real.... he was shown on the dead people highlight reel.... omg.... kinemon looking like a proud dad...#that hiyori and momo reunion.... i need more... what was that....#episode 1078#talking tag#watching one piece#who tf is that talking to the cp0...#hawkins is alive.... oh now he regrets it.... now he is dead... well.....#can't believe izo is dead... marco saying he cant believe he is alive... WELL YOU FOUGHT TWO TIMES AND THEM DID FUCK ALL WHILE IZO DIED????#i am so mad at this man you dont understand. HIYORI DROPKICKED MOMO AJSHAJA YEAHHH!!!#luffy and zoro waking up at the same time... it started with them too... oof#in my bliss of luffy winning and gear 5 and all i hadn't realised my pink haired samurai hasn't appeared in a while... i fear the worst....#i love how luffy having a meal is animated like a fight... omg zoro too... using his three head technique...#nami being the first to hit momo akdjaks. well deserved also#yamato not bathing or eating for zoro and luffy and hiyori bathing zoro ajdhskjs. omg this looks like sanji is jealous FA-#nami having to think hard about who bathes where lmao sanji and brook need an execution#OTAMA WHAT ARE YOU DOING AJDHSJSHSJ ME ASF ALSO SORRY. also where tf is robin. DID THEY TAKE HER??? oh nvm there is another group...#kid you are so right he is annoying. kill him. come on!!! SAKAZUKI DIE!!!! they just wanna make me mad atp... ALSO WHERE IS ROBIN??#episode 1079#why is there a country with a giant picture of sabo in their clock tower lmaoo#luffy looks so little beside yamato omg.... omg soul king brook ft kozuki hiyori rock version.... AND I DONT GET TO HEAR IT????#robin with her poneglyphs of course.... AND BROOK OWES HER TWO MORE!!!!#MOMOS GRANDFATHER???? AND HE TOOK CARE OF TAMA WHO HAS ORICHIS LAST NAME!!!
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I can't fucking believe that I procrastinated my gender for like. A good three years.
#Like in fairness I was in an incredibly abusive environment already#Questioning my gender was the last fuckin thing I needed so I was just like “that's a problem for later”#Butttttttttt... Now I've got no idea what I'm doing#Like I've cut my hair??? I like looking like a boy????#But I also know that a few months ago I was straight up wearing floor length skirts on the daily and braiding my hair with flowers??????#and my definition of “boy” and “man” is so inherently fucked up bc of the abuse that I'm unwilling to actually use those words???#And I chose the name I use for a reason as a promise (long story) but it's really feminine????#And it'd be nice if people would be ok with using two different names for me if it turns out I am genderfluid but?????#They almost certainly won't??????#Like most of them refuse to use my chosen name anyway and I'm just. To polite to correct them.#no I'm not canadien I'm british#Anyway help?#Bc I realised all this the other day LITERALLY AN HOUR before I went on stage and almost had a complete breakdown??????#good news is there's this trans boy in my performing arts group and he was so nice and supportive that I didn't cry in the end#much anyway but still?????? I procrastinated my fucking gender????????? And now I'm fuckin confused???????#Also I can now cosplay one of my OCs#So that's cool#Remember the name Becky Roberts guys#Like if I am trans for genderfluid or whatever it'll help next year with The Plan (which I may elaborate on if asked)#but also???? My parents still refuse to accept that I'm a lesbian if I tell them “yo I periodically become a boy”#They'll probably yell at me at BEST#“that's not a real thing!!!” NEITHER IS YOUR FAÇADE OF A HAPPY FAMILY BUT YOU BELIEVE IN THAT#*ahem* anyway yeah I'm struggling if anyone has any advice pls help#Oh and I've only told like one person I've cut my hair and I'm meeting up with a load of friends on Sunday#Bwhahahhahahahhah#help me#tw abuse mention#queer community
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Not me crying over Baldur’s Gate 3, my Tav is slowly getting more and more morally dubious and it’s only a little bit their fault
#spoilers in the tags cause I’m rambling#I’m in act two and I made it to the little light village. absolutley delighted to see everyone again it’s great#and then of course everything goes side ways- and guys.#I don’t know. if you’re supposed to win that fight with Jenieha or whatever her name is alive#but everyone outside of my group (had astarion shadowheart and wyll with me) died#and it was heart wrenching#like it totally felt like that was supposed to be the safe place where we all get together and march out on the absolute and what not#and then it just fell apart so devastatingly and I’m not okay about it#and more importantly my tav (Zeilith) is not okay about it#anyways point is I think they a little bit broke down sobbing before deciding they’re going to kill everyone that they have to#instead of getting into a fight with the one spider guy down the road she lied to him to get the fairy light and sent him off into the#darkness with his group to die to the shadow demons djdjdjjdjdjd#she’s keeping the fairy in the lamp cause she needs it and she’s done taking chances#it’s w i l d#anyways I’m having a ball#Tav is going to commit manslaughter and also cry over Mol because that’s her kid now djdjjsjs
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i was with the band today and i was like “how do you guys feel that i’m graduating this time next year” the reactions go as followed :
guitarist: ew!!!!
guitarist: i don’t like that
drummer: no more few and far for awhile :((
but i told them we can still have few and far if they’re willing to drive two hours to the place i’m staying while in college
#the few and far between#<- that’s our band name bee tee dubs#i love them so much#i’m going to cry when i graduate because of them#also for context guitarist is a school grade younger than me and drummer is two grades younger than be but we’re all in the same age group
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little brothers and their will to #slay, man </3
#while yes yes this post technically does apply to the simp bros i wanna cry about my own bro in the tags so you have been warned~?#so to start off my monthly existential crisis rant i just wanna say that… i’m so so soo envious of my bro. like to a really unhealthy extent#he’s tall enough to reach the top shelves. i can barely touch them if i jump. he has so many friends and even a gf. i have 0 irl friends.#he is able to sit in one spot and focus on his studies. i can’t even sit down for a full half hour to *eat* without getting up to take a nap#he’s learning how to drive. i can’t. he was admitted into university. i wasn’t. he’s able to find what he likes and stick to it. i can’t.#like mannn. he thrived in the course he chose in tertiary education while i lost my passion for it in the middle of my first year.#he’s good at picking up everything he tries (puzzle cubes; bball; you name it he’s good at it) while i’m just. bad at everything i try lol#he’s very good at his studies (aside from languages) and sports. i’m not good at anything at all.#he gets told that he has a great sense of humour. i’m just. boring and annoying. lolllll#he’s super sociable and he has good relations with pretty much every single family member (sans me). i’m not in contsct with most of the fam#heck he was pretty much the favourite from the moment he was born. his baby pics still get brought up from time to time bc of how cute he is#(granted it’s bc he looks like a bby m*ch*l*n man (like the tire company mascot) and he’s super cute in them but still)#and he’s also a guy and content with being a guy which is just… not fair y’knowwww~~~ asian family boy biases and all (cries)#our father pretty much cast me aside once my bro was old enough to hang with him. and even before then the bias was as clear as day. >:(((((#i make the dude mad? i get screamed at and whaccced. bro gets the dude mad? he gets a lesson on how to throw punches instead!!! like wow!!!!#he’s the only one who got to escape any direct physical harm from the guy and yet!!!! he was the 1st one to be singled out for trauma focus#idk if it’s bc of his age back then or whattttt but i can’t believe i had to friggin’ ask my therapist back then for a trauma assessment :(#2015 was a different time… my bro managed to succeed in school while i was rejected from the drama club for being too depressed :((((#but i’m sure my bro has his own share of struggles… and i’m glad that he has a few groups of friends to chill with. really.#but i just can’t help feeling extremely envious of him. i could never tell him any of this though we hardly talk at home lol#and he pretends not to know me when i approach him in public lmfaoooo. i don’t blame him though; i’d do the same if i were to approach me#so yeah. if you read this i’m sorry for being cringefail and bad at everything~~ am i still allowed to pollute your dash~? <3#and also. idk if i’ll be able to continue sischange over this week bc i’ll be handling 2 workstations by meself :( and idk how tired i’ll be#but we’ll see ok~? sorry for having zero time management skills am i still qualified to be a legit adult~?#sunday’s 🧂saltfest🧂
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My boss: you work as an usher and have to clean disgusting theaters multiple times a day and deal with people
Me: okay, will I get paid well?
Boss: no, you'll be paid below the livable wage and have the lowest paycheck out of all the positions you can have here
Me: will I ever get a raise?
Boss: no
Me: do I at least get both a 30 and a 15 minute breaks during my shifts since they're all over 8 hours?
Boss: no, you'll always have a 30 but if we're busy we'll need you to not take a fifteen
Boss: also on weekends you'll have to stay an hour longer than normal
Me: am I guaranteed to always get my fifteen on those days?
Boss: no
Me: is there any way to get paid more?
Boss: yes, training to work in a different position so you can work in 2 positions at once, but only managers can decide if you can get double trained
Me: okay.... At least I only work part time so hopefully I won't get too tired when summer comes
Boss: this summer we're having early very cheap movies so we need you to come in an hour early for every shift
Me: will I get paid any more for this at least?
Boss: no
And like- I feel ripped off-
#rambles#busy days with large crowds cause me to have a panick attack and cry by the end of my shift whenever that happens#and now they're having me come in early and consistently deal with a huge crowd#and i get paid barely anything#i get we're technically a 'locally owned' theater#but we're also the only theater within a mile radius#and we get the same amount of customers as the name brand theater i used to work at#like#literally concessions get's paid well over $25 bucks an hour#and they only have like 5 people trained in concessions and won't let anyone else in#there's like 20 ushers and we're all paid under $10 an hour and treated like shit daily#like 7 out of 9 shifts i get covered in trash juice from being the one to deal with the trash#I'm getting mistreated by customers#I'm having anxiety attacks#I'm cleaning 9 giant theaters multiple times a day#I'm moving boxes#I'm helping everyone else at their NON-USHER stations#because they schedule a lot of ushers#so when theaters aren't letting out to make sure there's not a giant group around the stand#they'll send us off to do other people's jobs but it won't be considered as us doing that job so we aren't paid for being “#'double trained' even though we all lnow how to part food and how to deal with cups and run the cash register and stuff#because of how often our coworkers walk away from their stations#us ushers are paid the least#but like#we're the most important ones there methinks (since we clean everything and help with everything else as well)#why are the people who microwave food paid more than the people who clean 9 theaters over 12 times a day????
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hoping u didn’t die cus u haven’t interacted in a while 🙏
(not saying u have to interact everyday i just wanna make sure ur doing ok!! rest up :3 )
nah i’m alive but i wish i wasn’t!!
#y’all don’t have to read this just ignore me#but i hate college#like studying in hs is one thing cus u just have to pass ur exams#and then ur done#but in college it’s like if u bs ur way thru it’s on u#cus this is is ur future job and if u don’t know shit ur gonna fuck ppl over#😭 i cannot see myself being a good doctor like i feel so stupid#also college is so lonely bruh#like everyone has different schedules so most of the time ur by urself#and i’m not big on parties but sitting in ur dorm studying for ur next exam while listening to everyone party outside is so lonely#like i wanna throw away my days and stay out till three am and miss my morning classes#but i CANT cus my parents wud kill me if i don’t pass#and even tho both of them r doctors they don’t understand mental health#and there’s no where to even cry properly here#like i thot being away from my parents wud make me happy 🪦#but instead i don’t feel at home at college nor at my actual house#😭 like where tf am i supposed to go then#and mostly everyone here is white and i feel so out of place#and in group projects i have to repeat my name ten times before anyone can get it#then they STILL mispronounce it#then listening to my roommate call her parents on speaker and listening to them tell her how much they love and support her#IT MAKES ME SO JEALOUS LIKE 😭 MY PARENTS DO NAWT SAY THE L WORD#anyway ya 😇😇 will update soon xoxo gossip girl#actually i won’t cus i’m annoyed at y’all for begging me for updates LIKE PLEEK IT TAKES TEN SECONDS TO READ THESE CHAPTERS AND HOURS 2 EDIT#ALSO CAN SOME OF YALL NOT READ IT SAYS THE TAGLIST IS CLOSED EVERYWHERE 😵💫 like i’m flattered u wanna be on it but just turn my notifs on#i hate tagging sm literallt the next 2 chapters are written but i’m too lazy to tag and annoyed at ppl asking for updates#ok that’s it#slay#i should kms#kai mail 💌
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Stupidly I decided to watch this video just now.
Today would have been my Grandma's birthday, but we lost her last fall and then my Nanna in the winter.
I did not think that a commentary video on Rugrats would make me uncontrollably sob. But I blocked out how sad the Mother's Day episode was. And combining it with Grandma's birthday...
I've spent the last 10 minutes or so doubled over crying.
#i kind of knew some sort of emotional outbreak was incoming soon but i didn't know when#that time ended up being now#because the start of this week was emotional since a show i was working on ended#and for some reason that show ending just felt way more emotional than other shows i've done ending#so many people were crying. but i didn't cry.#we had had a performance on mother's day and our director had lost her mother recently#so she was upset that whole day and so was so much of the cast and crew. i still didn't cry.#while holding a crying friend at the closing party i told another friend that the emotions will hit me later.#i didn't know when but i knew it was going to. at some time.#both my grandmothers had passed while i was working on different productions with this group#and both times i came to the theater hours later and it had been emotionally healing to be there.#this was the first production i worked on after losing both of them so it felt a little weird.#(plus the color purple trailer came out and that book and musical makes me SOB and i refuse to watch the trailer)#(also add in Tina Turner's passing and her birth name being the same as my grandma's)#and basically all of those feelings and having these other theatre experiences mixed up with my losses#combining with it being my grandma's birthday AND i happened to be crocheting when i watched this video#which is a defining skill that Grandma taught me... i was SUCH a mess. i just could not stop crying.#i had mentioned backstage that i can't rewatch moana because i can't handle the storyline anymore.#and just now while in the middle of this emotional explosion i thought of moana and cried HARDER.#this is a good commentary but GOD i did not expect it to trigger all of this.#when i say doubled over i mean literally doubled over and shaking.#anyway. i think i feel better now. i think i needed this crying session.#in sims your sim can have an 'emotional bomb' quirk. they freak out uncontrollably for 30 seconds then they're fine.#i've never really hated that quirk because that is literally me.
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look at this pic of me my mom took when i was 15/16(?) with the camp counselor i had a crush on
#don't ask me why he wore a kilt i still don't know#he was the gun range/archery teacher though i specifically joined that activity to be near him... his name was brad#it was so weird because i had come back from camp already this was the week after and i was going back to get some stuff and he#just so happened to be there and i think he was like 'what are you doing out here shouldn't you be in your cabin?' bc he thought i was#still AT camp instead of just visiting. idr how i got him to take a pic w/ me but it was kismet :) i have so many funny anecdotes abt camp#like i think this was the same year that my friend partnered up with him^ during some huge group activity where we kept changing partners#and i calmly exited the room of like 100+ people & broke down in the bathroom because i was so jealous of her bc she related to ppl easier#but she also accidentally touched a different counselors dick that year while we were in the lake and she got banned from ever coming back#because she had a huge fear of the camp director shooting everyone like she had constant nightmares abt it and she was trying to get over#her fear of him that year by being near him more and talking to him but uh. he misrepresented what she was doing and made it seem like she#was trying to seduce him or something so she got banned and cried all the way back home when our mothers came to get us... it was tense#i had genuinely never seen her cry before it was so fucking crazy to me. anyways... pretty wild stuff
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