#also the 'i wanna love you but i don't know how' twists like a knife when you think abt it w/ danse

[freddleafton12345-blog]

ShadowMilk cookie x lonely! Desperate female reader, who's a Kitsune!))

WARNING! MENTION OF SELF HARM!

You've had enough.

Time to start cutting away at your arms again with a small knife.

Seeing so many people having a lover made you jealous. You wanted that sort of affection. To be held. Cuddled. Kissed. Wanted.

But nobody seemed interested in you.

Was it because you were too skinny/fat? Was it because you didn't wear enough makeup?

"Well, this is an interesting bunch of thoughts~!"

The sudden voice in your head made you stop yourself from getting ready to add another cut into your dough.

"Who's there!? Show yourself!" You looked around the bathroom, your ears flicking everywhere to pick up any possible source of the voice.

"Relax, my dear! I'm a friend!" The voice chimed. "Looking for a conversation! You see, your upset, yes?"

"Wha-"

"Tired of being single? Seeing couples makes you think your too useless, right? Everybody's neglecting you! But I...I like you."

"You're saying nonsense! I don't even know you!"

The owner of the voice smirked to himself. He knew that manipulating you into being his forever was all too simple.

You were meant to be his.

"Yes you do~! We've interacted in your dreams many times!"

You paused.

There was a cookie that had been seeing you in your dreams a lot. He looked like a Jester that was decorated in black and blue, with a dash of white. And he had gorgeous mismatched eyes.

Was that the owner of the voice in your head?

"I can read your thoughts, and yes! I'm the guy from your dreams! ShadowMilk cookie!"

"ShadowMilk cookie? Wait you- YOU'RE THE BEAST THAT TRIED TORMENTING PURE VANILLA COOKIE!" You panicked, gripping your tail to calm down.

"Pssht, relax darling! I don't wanna hurt ya! I wanna help you! You seem like you want to have a lover. A companion. I can do that for you, if you become my...helper, hehe!"

'Helper?'

Becoming the assistant of the most powerful Beast cookie, in exchange for affection?

You wanted to say no. To warn Pure Vanilla that ShadowMilk was watching you.

But...finally being loved and cared for was all too tempting.

And the Beast smirked as he knew...

You were already under his control...

~~~

ShadowMilk cookie had given you a glowing blue trail of energy only you could see. So you could find his domain.

And it was fun but twisted.

You admired some of the carnival games, and even attended a theater show. You indulged in your curiosity and fun.

Then you headed into the castle.

"Oho, I see I've got my favorite person is infront of me? FINALLY!" The Jester exclaimed, flying off his chair to inspect you.

Your ears pinned back, he didn't look scary, but you knew better than to let your guard down.

"H-hi there, ShadowMilk cookie.." you muttered shyly.

"Now now, no need to be shy! If I'm going to be your boyfriend, then I wanna see your cute face!" He tilted your head upwards slightly with his hand, smirking.

Would he ever let you go?

No...

~~~

It's been about 6 months since you got to meet the Beast cookie and stay at his twisted castle.

And you asked yourself why you didn't do it sooner.

Was him pampering you and telling you he loved you everyday a lie? Probably. But did it feel nice being treated like that?

Yes, because you were so damn desperate.

As you played around with the giant black and blue snake, his pet, he simply watched you from afar.

...did he like you?

The Beast really didn't know. He got jealous and angry anytime you spoke about PureVanilla. Saying he should've noticed how badly you were hurting on the inside, and that the fact he didn't, made him a poor excuse of a true friend.

But he also didn't know if he wanted to give you his heart.

So, he continued to simply treat you like his partner, when he didn't consider himself as such a thing.

"Hi ShadowMilk cookie!" You went over to him, the snake following you. "I fed Noodle, just as you asked!"

"Ah, very well done then! Noodle doesn't like anybody who's not me! Count yourself a very lucky, lucky cookie!" The Beast pet his snake, then sent it elsewhere.

Then, he looked...serious?

"..." ShadowMilk removed his Jester crown and looked away. Like he was..scared?

"Now then, um...you see, I had a script. Bring you here, feed you sweet, little lies, and make sure you would go against PureVanilla cookie. Help me get his soul jam. However, you ruined that script!"

"W-what-? No, no, I don't know what you mean!" You felt scared. Was he gonna kill you?

"...you made me feel warm and fuzzy when you're around. You haunted my mind and it was so...so ANNOYING! And you made me want more of it.."

No way.

No fucking way he was confessing!?

"..." the Beast cookie said nothing as he took your hand in his, his gaze on the floor.

"...I like you too, ShadowMilk cookie. I didn't think I'd be able to learn to love you, but...I can't help it." You admitted, your ears pinned and tail wagging.

"Oh, is that so~?" He put his crown back on and pulled you in close, summoning an apple.

"Then...why don't you and I become one, heart and soul, hm?" He held it up towards you.

You leaned in and took a bite of the apple, and he did the same thing while maintaining his eyes on yours, like a hungry predator.

Even when the apple slipped and hit the floor, his gaze didn't leave yours. It only closed once he shut his eyes as you kissed him deeply. And he wasted zero time in reciprocating.

And in that moment you knew he was actually being honest for once.

And it made you happy, knowing you were worth his complete honesty~

Guys this fic is one of my longest, sorry if it's bad. Also, idk if that's his pet or not, but I hc this is his pet snake, Noodle! (He would name it smth silly lmao) (also that wasn't an apple of deceit, just a normal apple idk it was hot 2 think about :3)

"PLEASE, REBLOG AND SHARE THIS, FOLKS! AND I'LL SEE YOU NEXT TIME, MWEHEHE~!!"

[feroluce]

So I've already seen this one pointed out, but in the new CG, Boothill's older human form doesn't really match what people thought it should. Of course it could just be neglect on Hoyo's part like I've seen speculated, but personally? With the other lore we got from this patch, combined with some of the stuff we already had, I'd love to think there is a possibility that is way, WAY more fun.

(fun for me and all the other whump enjoyers, anyway, RIP Boothill fjkasjkdj)

In Boothill's lc, we see him in the middle of his surgery where he threw away his flesh and bone body for steel and cybernetics. We know it was The Big Surgery and not just like some sort of tune up or modification because of the description attached to the lc:

Which is where a lot of the dissonance comes in, because in this lc, Boothill's hair is much, much longer than in the cg.

And as someone who also has super long hair, I can tell you that it would take like. Multiple years to grow it out to this length.

There's also the fact that these cybernetic arms don't even match, the lc is the one that looks like our Boothill does now. And there's no reason for Boothill's shirt to be ripped up and in tatters like that; it even states he takes off his clothes before the lc surgery. If it were a matter of Hoyo needing to censor nudity, there were plenty of other methods they could have used that would make more sense, like a hospital gown, a blanket, surgical partition, etc

When will I get to see Boothill with all his scars, Hoyo, when, quit cockblocking me!!! OTL

But there was also another piece of new lore this patch that hit me like a fuckin' brick- the fact that Boothill was tortured by the IPC.

He just drops this out of nowhere! Just says it and then moves right along!! BABY, PLEASE. I WANNA KNOW MORE SO GODDAMN BAD.

But anyway as Hydrachea pointed out to me, this means the torture definitely had to happen before the lc surgery, because being whipped with a belt soaked in saltwater (fucking OUCH) wouldn't work on someone with metal skin.

So, we know that the IPC did, at some point, capture Boothill. And this is reaching further back to previous patches, but we also know from the Luminary Wardance event in 2.5 that the IPC also dabbles in cybernetic arms, because of the one they foisted on Luka.

The model there is a new one they're debuting, but we see in a flashback sequence that the IPC has been part of the cybernetics game for at least 700-800 years, because they also manipulated Igor into getting one too, and this could have only happened before the Eternal Freeze on Jarilo-VI.

It's never stated just how old Boothill is, or how long ago the genocide on Aeragan-Epharshel took place.

But I doubt it was more than 700-800 years ago.

I really don't think Boothill is that old, or has been doing this for that long. So he definitely would have been captured at a point that the IPC was manufacturing cybernetic arms, and had a known history of amputating perfectly healthy patients to use them.

I wonder if all their test subjects were willing.

(This part is entirely unnecessary for the new cg showing Boothill being a forced lab rat as part of the IPC torturing him. But it is a fun, delightful, bloodily gruesome twist of the knife nonetheless.

Boothill was also betrayed by his own brothers-in-arms on Aeragan-Epharshel. For the IPC. Just saying.)

[the-one-who-lambs]

uhh hello!! sorry if this is a tall order LOL but I wanna ask, do you have any narilamb fanfic recs? :D I already read yours and I really like bamsara’s and I’m waiting for epicaandk’s to update (that one is my fav ever <3) but idk what to read now lol

Tall order?? Naaaaah, I'm always happy to give recs. Oh boy, I'm gonna go in reverse chronological order.

If you've read all of my narilamb fics (have you seriously? I'm impressed, that's probably well over half the 150k+ I've written for this damn fandom. Also, to anyone seeing this from a reblog, my stuff is over at onethirdofimpossible!) then here we go!

You already mentioned it, but The Rehabilitation of Death is excellent so far! This one is by @bamsara who is new to the CotL fandom but apparently not new to fanfic writing; they have a really popular FNAF fic and I assume the well-deserved attention this fic's been getting is a byproduct of the popularity they've already gotten in other fandoms. :D Welcome, bamsara! Many of the fic writers in this fandom are friends with each other already, but we don't bite if you wanna say hi.

Feel No Evil and Language Barrier, both by @payasita. I always love how payasita portrays this duo (in both digital art and writing), with so much sass and repressed loneliness, knowing they're stuck together for eternity and making the best of it. (And maybe falling in love, depending on how dense Narinder keeps being.) What makes these come alive for me is how well thought out the setting is outside the Lamb and Narinder. The descriptions and weight of emotions really pop here.

LITERALLY ANYTHING written by pavi / @i-eat-deodorant. Depending on how spicy you want your fics to be he has even more here. Character analysis, diction, pacing, etc. are consistently 10/10. Top-quality banter between a sassy Lamb and tired old man Narinder. We constantly bounce ideas off each other and inspire each other a lot but I promise I'm not hyping him up just because he's my friend oh my god please just go bless your eyes.

It Was For You, O Death by blueberry-muffin-massacre (if they have a tumblr, let me know so I can tag!). An intriguing alternative ending to the final battle wherein the Lamb chooses a secret third option by refusing to give up the Red Crown and still observing Narinder as the God of Death. So many details are so well thought out and duality their relationship is nicely characterized-- both genuine care for each other and also quite unhealthy. A fine line treaded well!

Confessional by jusmove (again, lmk if they have a tumblr). Been a while since I've read it, but I love how the Lamb chips at Narinder's very carefully built emotional walls. Their personalities are very well fleshed out here, especially Narinder's cognitive dissonance at being able to process love.

Confession by @thewitchoftheweed. I didn't expect a part two to this one, but my god I was so thrilled when it did update. Narinder and Lamb with their unique and parallel loneliness and their fucked-up sense of everything. Their relationship is very rocky here, and I love how they navigate it: with tension and eventual, pained acceptance. Mind the rating.

Of Character Development and Being Dense by @calliecature. A short and sweet narilamb classic. They're both mutually pining and one of them is too emotionally repressed to realize it. Guess who.

Not An Offering, But a Gift by @checkplzjuliet. Small confession fic. I especially love how Narinder's descriptions twist the knife of his situation here, and how Lambert is a total foil for him! There are a lot of good things happening in such a short span, which is impressive.

Also, if you think you've read all my narilamb fics... I do have a secret one out there too. Just so you know.

Happy reading!

I'm already friends with many of the people here, but if any of the writers I've tagged have been kinda wanting to reach out for a while but feel a little anxious... Don't be. I've made my best friends in this fandom by literally just waiting for some of my readers to get over whatever assumption they have that I'm cool and say hi. Or being the more confident one first.

[ivystoryweaver]

With You part 6

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Summary: Will you always have to wake up in the middle of the night just to get to know Jake? Marc and Steven notice your yearning to see Jake again.

Pairings: Marc Spector x reader, Steven Grant x reader, Jake Lockley x reader. Gender neutral reader. No use of Y/N. Reader is engaged to Marc and Steven.

Word Count: 3k

Warnings/notables: Fluff, complicated relationship stuff, cursing, angst, sex but the language is not overly explicit and nothing gender-specific. Let me know if I missed a warning. inaccurate DID, based on the show. Not beta'd we die like arthur harrow in the back of jake's car

Dividers by saradika

PREVIOUSLY, on "With You"...

Wondering what he would ever do without you, Marc pulled you close, gently swaying with you in the silence of your flat. He had always felt so hard to love - his childhood had made sure of that. But you loved him hard.

One of the delicious advantages of being with Marc was that he liked to bury his angst, longing and inadequacies inside your body. Perhaps fucking through his feelings wasn't the healthiest coping mechanism, but it was better than drinking, and cheaper than therapy.

That's not to say Marc didn't see a therapist - he did, pretty regularly. But being inside you felt so much better than unearthing the shit from his childhood.

That's where you found yourself now, face down on the mattress, Marc's strong chest pressed to your back. Your sweat-soaked bodies writhed in tormented bliss as he thrust in and out of you - hard and almost frustratingly slow.

His thick fingers pushed their way through yours, intertwining, pressing your hands high above your head as he twisted his body deeper into yours.

You were helpless beneath him. And you loved it.

Marc was able to control so few things about his existence. The use of your body was one thing you happily and trustingly put completely in his control.

You and Marc did make soup together for dinner, but no matzah balls were harmed in the making of the soup. It was hearty enough for Marc, but also vegan for Steven. You made a mental note ask Jake what kind of food he liked.

"I don't think Jake's a vegan," Marc spoke up, reading your mind. "I think he's the reason my sandwiches are gone half the fuckin' time."

Marc and his sandwiches. He had sworn up and down, on more than one occasion, that either you or Steven had eaten his damn roast beef sandwiches. You always denied it, preferring turkey to beef. And Steven always fired back with, "Y'know I don't eat that shite, mate."

"Oh my god, I think you just solved a mystery," you marveled. The Mystery of the Roast Beef Sandwich and its thief.

Yeah, Marc wondered what else Jake was prone to stealing. Clothes? Money? You?

Then again, Marc couldn't really say anything about money at the moment. He didn't have a job, unless he counted the occasional times he fronted during Steven's university library shift. You were the breadwinner, at least for the time being, lovingly supporting Steven in getting a degree to actually match up to his intellect.

But sharing you? Was it even sharing if it was the same body? And was it even his business if you wanted to be with Jake? He had no fucking clue. All he knew was that you were about to be his spouse. Steven's too, really. But you barely knew Jake. How could you marry someone you didn't know?

"I can hear you thinking," you teased, slathering some fresh-baked bread with butter. "Wanna talk about it? Cause I don't think I can go anymore rounds today - between you and Steven." Meaning Marc wouldn't be able to bury his worries inside you until your body got a damn break.

"Do you mean between me and Steven and Jake?" Marc pointedly asked.

You dropped the butter knife. "W-what?" You squawked. "I haven't slept with Jake."

"But...you want to." Easing beside you, Marc leaned back against the kitchen counter. "Do you?"

You reallly should have spouted off a quick 'no'. But you hesitated.

"Shit," he groaned. "I shoulda known."

"I didn't say anything!" You protested, a little too innocently.

"Exactly," Marc huffed. "You didn't deny it."

"You kind of put me on the spot," you defended, retrieving the knife and returning to your task, furiously coating a slice of bread with five times too much butter. "Besides, Jake drives me crazy. If he climbs in the damn window again, I think I might shove him right back out."

"Ah, hell, it's worse than I thought," Marc grumbled, folding his toned arms over his chest in a distinct, defiant pout.

"How is it worse?" You scoffed. "And...what is worse?"

"You... him... shit," he sighed. "He got to you."

"He didn't," you protested. "Nothing happened. N-not really..." your voice trailed off as Marc's eyes flashed with possessiveness.

"Not really? I thought you said he didn't touch you. What the hell..." He paused, glancing at his reflection in the microwave.

"Is that Steven?" You interrupted, barging in to what you usually respected as private conversation between the boys. "What is he saying?"

Fixing his eyes back on you, Marc smirked triumphantly. "He's saying you look 'a bit flustered,' which would make sense, since you wore those black satin pj's and set your alarm just to see 'that mysterious bloke'."

"Steven, you are such a traitor!" You whined. "You guys are ganging up on me! I just wanted to talk to him."

"Mm-hmm," Marc hummed, caging you in against the counter with one arm on either side of your body. "So that's all you did - talk? In black satin? In the middle of the night?"

Narrowing your eyes, you called his bluff. "You guys are really obsessed with those pj's. Maybe you would have preferred I only wore your t-shirt? Or, I could have slept the way I sleep with you half the time - in nothing."

"Sure, mm-hmm," Marc playfully nodded down at you, mockingly agreeing with every word out of your mouth.

"Besides," you added, giving his chest a playful shove, "who knows how many times Jake has come home and found me like that - then slept beside me anyway?"

Marc went dead silent.

"I'm gonna kill him," he decided, waiting just a beat before scooping you up and throwing you over his shoulder, spinning you around the kitchen playfully. "First him..." you squealed as he tickled your side, feeling a mixture of giddiness and dizziness as he manhandled you, "then you. And then him again."

"Marc, put me down, put me down!" you giggled delightedly, banging your fists on his back.

After a few more twirls, and howls of laughter from you, he conceded, steadying you back against the counter. The two of you were smiling, breathless... his strong arms caged you in again as he wet his lips with his tongue.

Ducking down, he pressed his body into yours, breathing hotly against your open mouth.

"Promise me something..." he murmured, sucking on your bottom lip and swiping his tongue inside your mouth. He pulled back just a little, teasing you.

"What?" you impatiently demanded, chasing after his lips.

Sliding one hand around the back of your neck, he crushed his lips to yours, giving you what you really wanted. Gripping your jaw, he slid his tongue over yours, licking hotly as you groaned in satisfaction. You could never get tired of kissing this man.

"Promise me," he finally whispered, kissing the corner of your mouth, nuzzling your cheek with his nose. "Promise you'll tell me if something does happen - with Jake, I mean."

Easing back, he stared down into your eyes - his own warm, brown gaze pleading. "I know you don't have to. It-it's not my business, really, but..."

Sighing reluctantly, he poured his heart out to you. He knew he was safe with you - safe to show you what he really felt inside. "It's not like Steven," he admitted. "I don't know Jake. I just...I don't want anything to happen to you."

Nodding quickly, you reached up to caress his face. "Marc, of course. You're going to be my husband - of course I would tell you that."

"Really?" His eyes sparkled with relief and love.

"Yes, really," you sweetly whispered. "And I know there's no part of you that could ever hurt me."

After all that fuss with Steven and Marc, and the damn black satin pajamas, you actually thought you might see Jake again soon - particularly since he had finally introduced himself to his alters.

You thought wrong.

Jake went back to being Jake, not interacting with you or Marc or Steven, and the three of you were none the wiser about how he spent his time.

You couldn't wreck your entire sleep schedule just to look for him every night. He clearly had no intention of interacting with you during waking hours. You tried very hard not to take it personally. After all, you barely knew one another. But Steven and Marc could tell you thought of him...worried after him.

"I think you should wait up for him one night, love," Steven suggested one evening as you sat cuddled on the couch, reading together. London was being London again. The heavens had opened, dumping cold, wet rain for hours, and creating the perfect, candlelit night in for you and Steven.

Glancing over at your fiancé, so adorable in his oversized jumper, your eyebrows knit together questioningly. "You mean, set my alarm? 'Ambush' him again?"

Reaching up to pull his reading glasses off his nose, Steven shrugged. "Don't think it's much of an ambush, really. Just lovely you wanting to talk, is all. No harm in that."

Smiling warmly, you reached for his hand. "I don't think he sees me quite the way you do, my love."

"Not very bright then, is he? Running 'round at all hours for the old bird, missing the chance to come home to a wonder like you."

"Steven," you gasped, grinning at him. "Talking like that is going to bring an end to our night of reading very quickly."

"Fine by me, darling," he chuckled, tossing his book aside without even bothering to mark the page - something Steven never did. "Because I'm not the dimwitted bloke ignoring what's right in front of me." Scooting closer, he pulled you into his arms. "His loss is my gain, I'd say. Have you all the more to m'self."

So it was decided.

You would wait up for Jake (or wake up -whichever) to see if he wanted to interact with you, and ask how he was doing. It was possible, and in your mind, likely, that he didn't want to be a part of your life. But you wanted to hear it from his own mouth, especially since he slept beside you - in your bed, in your home.

Despite your general apprehension, you decided to be your most normal self and sleep (or in this case, stay awake) in one of Marc's white undershirts - they were so soft and smelled so deliciously like him. Steven's fuzzy goldfish socks found their way to your freezing feet.

You took a long nap and drank a huge cup of coffee (made perfectly by Marc) before bed. You were determined to stay up and see how Jake typically began his nighttime routine. He always ninja'd around like some sort of Father Christmas - waiting til everyone was completely asleep before darting in and out of the flat.

It would be your luck that Jake probably wouldn't even front tonight, and your caffeinated body would stare at your sleeping fiancé for the next several hours.

At first, it was difficult to resist cuddling up with your sleepy Steven. He did manage to adorably whine that he needed you, but you quickly reminded him that this was his idea.

"Just miss you 's all," he murmured, drifting off to dreamland.

You got bored very quickly. Steven had recommended a podcast called, 'Welcome to Staying Awake.' Finding some headphones, you tried it out, following the directions it suggested - reading, solving a puzzle, and so forth.

You were just starting to doze in the comfy chair in the bedroom's corner when your fiancé stirred...only to roll over and fall back asleep.

"Ugh..." you huffed, pushing off your chair to head to the kitchen. After a quick splash of water to the face and a long drink of water, you stumbled back to your bedroom...

...where you saw Steven? pulling a pair of tailored black trousers up his legs - his cozy pj's nowhere in sight. Fastening his pants, he turned around - shirtless - nodding once to acknowledge you.

"Jake?" You tentatively greeted, breaking the late-night silence.

"Hola, mi amor," Jake's rich, deep voice greeted you smoothly - his chocolate eyes flickering down to your bare legs. "I'm sorry I woke you."

"Jake," you exhaled shakily, easing toward him slowly. "You didn't wake me up. I was waiting for you."

Warmth bloomed in his chest, but he simply reached for his white dress shirt, quickly easing his arms into the sleeves and fastening the buttons.

"Where...do you keep your clothes?" you cautiously asked, inching closer.

Nodding to the closet, he remained quiet, knotting his tie and sitting down on the edge of the bed to pull on his socks and shoes. Khonshu had awakened him. Time to get to work.

"Where are you going?" you questioned after a few quiet moments watching him getting dressed.

Finishing the lacing of his shoes, he stood, reaching for his leather jacket. Realizing your question was not rhetorical, he granted you a slight smirk. "You know where."

"Can I come with you?" You blurted, already flustered. How did he manage to do this to you?

Narrowing his eyes, he shook his head, tutting a bit condescendingly. "You're not serious."

"I am," you insisted, scurrying over to the drawer to find some joggers for your bare legs. Of course, in this state, compared to Jake, you would be way underdressed. He looked head-to-toe incredible.

The faster you moved, trying to get dressed in enough presentable clothing to go out into the frigid rain, the slower Jake moved. But each action was nonchalant, as if he barely noticed your effort.

Why was he so damn infuriating? Then again, those were the exact words he'd said about you...

Pulling a leather glove over his long fingers, one dark eyebrow shot up inquisitively.

"Almost ready," you huffed, feeling like a child asking to go to work with a parent.

Realizing you were serious, Jake yanked on the second glove, giving his knuckles a crack. "Mi corazón..." he warned, pulling his flat cap over the lustrous curls on his head, and wondering what had gotten into you. You couldn't possibly think he would let you anywhere near his night life.

You were dressed now, in a weird mixture of your clothes and Marc's, but your goldfish-clad feet still poked adorably out of your joggers. Glancing all around the room, your eyes frantically searched for the nearest pair of shoes.

Approaching you confidently, Jake reached for your elbow, bringing you to a standstill. "I have to go. You should sleep."

Yanking your arm out of his grasp, you huffed. "I told you I don't respond well to orders."

Rubbing his gloved hand over the stubble on his chin, he nodded, "Goodnight," and turned to walk out of the bedroom.

"No, I'm coming with you, Jake, wait--"

"No, mi corazón. No." He whirled around, his gaze burning into yours.

"Why not?" you shot back, your hands landing on your hips. "You're going to work, right? I need to talk to you. And I want to see what you do."

He scoffed. "No. You don't."

"Stop telling me no," you snapped, realizing this whole stay-up-and-talk-to-Jake thing was already an unprecedented disaster. You simply could not keep your cool around this man.

"Ah, I see - I can't tell you what to do, but you can give me orders." Stalking back over to the night table, he reached for Marc and Steven's phone.

"I-I'm not giving you orders...I just- why can't I come with you?" You were desperate. You realized, at that moment, that alll this was not a good look on you. What happened to cool, calm and collected you? What happened to the you who respected the hell out of Marc and Steven's autonomy and choices?

You went so far as not even trying to dictate to Marc whether or not he should drink. It was his choice, always - it had to come from him. So why couldn't you do the same with Jake? You knew the drill - people were going to do what they decided to do. Arguing the point was only arguing with reality itself.

Sure, you could explain your fears or needs, and Jake could take that information into account. But ultimately, every person in the world always chose what they were going to choose - period, the end.

"I'm not taking you out there. You know it's not safe," he explained with infuriating calmness. "I'm not exactly working a normal job here."

"You mean...you mean Moon Knight. Like...saving people. Like you did with me that night."

His eyes flashed - you couldn't decipher if it was anger or surprise. "Marc told you."

"Yes," you answered softly, taking a moment to breathe in deeply. You had to calm down and stop sounding so desperate. "I just don't understand why you can follow me - why you can watch over me and save me, but you won't just talk to me." Your lip trembled as you started to realize he just may not ever want to be in your life.

"I thought you said that I was your family," you whispered, moving close to peer up into his eyes. "But you haven't talked to me in a week. I've been worried...I've been thinking about you."

Wetting his lips, Jake swallowed hard and shifted from one foot to the other - the first inkling that you were having any effect on him whatsoever. His dark eyes flickered down to yours. "I told you I can take care of myself," he gruffly responded, his resolve beginning to crack. "So stop worrying about me."

"Stop telling me what to do," you fired back, refusing to shrink away. "You're driving me crazy. If you don't want to talk to me, or know me - if you want to sneak in and out of here every night and never see me again, then just say so."

Your chest heaved with emotion. "I won't like it and I won't ever stop worrying about you, or wanting to know you, but --"

You didn't get to finish because Jake roughly pulled you into his arms and crushed his mouth to yours.

@stormydaysxx laaundromat @kindlover @spxctorsslxt @deezisnotreal

@rivalriotrenegade @wordacadabra this--is--music @i-still-dont-like-your-face 

idk if all the tags work. I tried!

[yourlocalstranger123]

What if someone hurts dan heng's darling? (Yandere)

WARNING⚠️: not that described but still has gore, torture, etc, described. So if you do not wish to read something so bloody, please ingore this. Ty <3

He would probably go GREAT lengths of torture and then ask you what to do with them.

(Also, just pretend that, uhh, some things exist in there like the poison that i will mention)

He would first drown them, not to the verge of dying, of course. He then would use a knife to put thousands of cuts on them, twist the skin almost to the point of its being able to be peeled off and pour alcohol on the cuts. He would feed them with a very tiny dose of arsenic, and of course, he wouldn't want that sinful person to have permission to see you anymore.

So he gouges out their eyes. Oh? You don't like hearing them scream? He'll carefully not let the person die as he removes their vocal cords and would rip out their jaw so they can't ever mouth any insults. When he's finally done, he'll blindfold you, not wanting to see the horror he's done to the person. Unless you want to of course....

But once you have stepped in, he'll wrap his tail around you as he holds your hand. Asking what to do with that horrible person.

If you ask him to give them mercy and make them die, he'll smash the person's head with his tail or cut their head with the sharpest water. (Since he has the power of water)

And he'll probably clean it up with his powers too, but if he uses his tail, he would asks you nicely, saying please if you could help him wash his tail. (He just wants to be with you, have your attention, and feel your touch)

But if you're an innocent sunshine where you had never seen bloodshed, not used to it, or do not wish to see it, he won't ever let you know or see it. So he automatically kills them.

But if we're taking about the fluff side here, He will get anything to cheer you up. You like ice cream? He gets every flavor you seem to like. You wanna talk about how shitty they are and how hurt you are? He'll sit there listening. You wanna cuddle? He will happily wrap his tail around you as he snuggles against you.

Oh? You want some alone time? Aww..... but he loves you, he doesn't want to make you feel uncomfortable...(But he will still watch you from afar)

You wanna just sit there and pet his horns and tail? He will sit there still as a statue and acts like a doll. Letting you do anything to him.

If you let him, he will absolutely smother your face with kisses (and maybe worship you the best he can to prove he's way better and that you don't need anyone else...)

[multi-fan-dom-madness]

Hi! *Waves like a weird-o*

You probably already know this, but I absolutely love your writing and you truly are so talented. Please never stop!! Even if you just write for yourself!!!

So I do have a mini request if you don't mind of course. Post-sex cramps? For female reader? Clone of your choice of course and any way you wanna write it; NSFW or NFW.

No rush of course!! Thank you!! ❤️

- Hales

And here is cat + kitten(s) for your troubles. And puppies if you like those better. And a snake if you like those too.

hiiii friend! *waves back like a weirdo* first of all, thank you so much?? for the kind words?? omg. I appreciate you so much—and the pictures of the baybiessssss! I love all of them, please give them snoot boops for me (if they're yours ofc). anyways, I hope this is somewhat in line with what you envisioned! I opted for the fluff/SFW route because I need that tonight lol enjoy! <3

Comforting Touches

Summary: Some HCs and blurbs about how the commander batch comforts you through some post-sex cramping.

Warnings: no actual sex described but still mature content so 18+, minors get outta here; f!reader, fluff, i guess hurt/comfort?, big strong stoic men being soft and loving

Word Count: 1.1k

dividers by @saradika and @dystopicjumpsuit

Cody

Like with many other things in his life, Cody is nothing if not thorough. Meticulous in the way that he picks you apart and puts you back together, painstaking in the image of self-confidence and dominance that he exudes when he’s intimate with you. 

And just as attentive to your needs after he makes you finish several times. If you wince in pain from the cramps beginning to twist your insides, despite the many orgasms he’d given you, he’s all over that. 

Tilts your head to the sides to check your vitals, gets you meds, and frowns when you try to shoo him off. “You’re not goin’ anywhere until you’re good, cyar’ika.” 

More than anything, you’re just grateful to still be sitting on the edge of his bunk. Between the shakiness in your legs from the strain of having him buried inside you just a few minutes ago, and the pain tugging at your body, you have no energy to stand right now. Cody sighs, a furrow deepening between his brows; you can’t resist the impulse to smooth his skin with your thumb. You trace the outline of his scar when his expression doesn’t relax. 

“Did I cause this?” he asks. Despite the way he tries to hide it, you can hear the concern underlying his words. 

Sighing, you shrug with one shoulder. “Kinda. But it’s okay,” you hurry to assure him. “It’s, um, most often caused by...intense orgasm. Or just intense sex. Happens now and then.” 

He blinks at you, your words clearly taking a moment to compute. Almost unbidden, a small groan escapes him. “O-Oh.” 

“Mhm.” You clench your teeth as another wave of cramps knifes through you. “Worth it.”

He cups your face in one hand, the other resting on your bare thigh, kneading your soft flesh. “Good. Because I can’t promise I won’t be able to keep myself from making you cum like that again.” 

His words are a promise, and you know Cody never breaks promises.

Wolffe

Listen I know we all think Wolffe is this hard-ass, mean dom (and he is) but he’s also very caring. Hard shell, gooey insides.

The minute you show signs of being in any kind of discomfort he’s right there, cradling you to his chest, smoothing his warm palms over your thighs, pressing a sweet kiss to your temple. 

“Where’s it hurt, mesh’la?” 

You curl in on yourself within Wolffe’s embrace, your body trying to wrap itself around the dull pain blossoming in your center. Though pleasure lingers in your limbs, this unfortunate side-effect of sex occasionally makes an appearance, particularly after a good romp with Wolffe. Normally it’s not so bad, but right now, you just want to squeeze into a ball and sleep until the cramping fades.

“M’sorry if I hurt you,” Wolffe rumbles in your ear, his voice soft and quiet. “I know I can be rough.” 

“S’not that,” you say with a small smile. “Just...does this when it’s really good.”

“That seems counterintuitive.” 

You bark a short laugh. “Tell that to whoever designed the female human body.” 

Wolffe tucks your head under his chin and presses a large, warm hand over your tummy to act as an impromptu heating pad until the cramps dissipate, his lips pressing chaste, close-mouthed kisses along your neck and shoulders to help distract you. You hum in contentment, drawing lazy circles on his bare hip, relishing how his muscles flex under your touch.

Fox

If the cramps take a bit to set in, and you’re both already re-dressed and ready to go about your days, Fox will still immediately put his very busy schedule on hold to make sure you’re okay. 

Gives you pain meds, extra water, and kisses you sweetly. “Why don’t you lay on the couch here for a bit until you feel better, sarad?” 

If/when you protest, he simply gives you his best deadpan look—which is quite good, considering he’s perfected it through use on his men—and crosses his arms, cocking his hip. 

You roll your eyes good-naturedly, the slight smile tugging at your lips vanishing into a twisted grimace at the next wave of cramping. Fox sighs and ushers you to the old, ratty couch he’d acquired for his office. He guides you to sitting down at the least, and nods in approval when you draw your legs up to your chest and hug your knees to put pressure on your center where the cramps are the worst. 

When he goes to turn away, you reach out to snag his hand, threading your fingers through his. “Fox?” 

“Hm?” He looks down at you, graying curls sweeping over his forehead. 

“Sit with me?” 

“Of course.” He graces you with a soft smile, retreats for just a moment to retrieve his datapad, and settles into the couch next to you. He rests one arm along the back of the couch; you snuggle into his warmth, grateful that he hasn’t yet put on the top half of his armor, and let your eyes drift shut, listening to the rhythmic tap-tap-tap of his fingers over his datapad while he works. You’d be able to fall asleep there, in post-orgasmic near-bliss. 

Rex

Rex realizes that something is amiss the moment that you don’t roll over to cuddle him after he returns from getting you a warm rag to clean off with.

When you simply groan your answer, the post-sex cramps clenching your insides a little more intensely than you’re used to, he’s instantly in Protective Partner Mode. 

“I’ve got you, cyare.” 

With strong, steady hands, Rex gently repositions you on the bed so that you’re lying on your front, before settling his knees to either side of your thighs. His thumbs, calloused and rough, rub slow, comforting circles along your spine, from your butt to your neck and back. Though he knows by now that he can’t do much in the way of helping your cramps aside from offering pain meds (which he retrieves as soon as he realizes what’s going on), he can offer you relaxation of other sorts. 

His practiced hands work away all the knots and kinks in your back, urging your entire body into a state of bliss beyond the post-orgasm glow. 

“How’s this, cyare?” he asks, voice quiet, contemplative. 

“Feels s’good,” you mumble, face smushed into the sheets. “Thank you, Rex.” 

“Always.” He leans over you to press a kiss to the side of your head. “I’d say that I’d stop doing whatever causes these cramps, but—”

“Don’t you dare,” you interrupt, playfully glaring out of the corner of your eyes. “You know damn well the orgasms you give are worth this discomfort.” 

He preens just a little at that, and if he happens to give your butt a squeeze or two while resuming his massage, well, that’s his deal. 

Ragu: @dystopicjumpsuit @clonemedickix @freesia-writes @littlemissmanga @wolffegirlsunite @anxiouspineapple99 @wings-and-beskar @sinfulsalutations @523rdrebel @sunshinesdaydream @moonlightwarriorqueen @sev-on-kamino @starrylothcat @deejadabbles @starqueensthings @mandos-mind-trick @idontgetanysleep @eyeluvmusic21 @wizardofrozz @mythical-illustrator @sleepycreativewriter @bobaprint @lem-hhn @thorsterstrudle @droids-you-are-looking-for @goblininawig @cw80831 @dreamie411 @jedi-hawkins @lune-de-miel-au-paradis @9902sgirl @originalcollectionartistry

[spookythesillyfella]

This is going to be a weird inbox to get considering it's 3 in the morning (On my end) as I do sent it but I've been wondering if you ever associated any song with digitaltime? This is a relatively new question for me to ask anyone since I don't usually go digging for ships out of the idea MAYBE people may feel embarrassed/uncomfortable talking about it? (Even if it did give them comfort!) If not song(s) at least maybe you can talk about them a bit, I used to love digitaltime back when I first joined dhmis in 2016 so I'm always really amazed the ship LIVES ON somewhere! (FEEL FREE TO TALK ABOUT SONGS AND HEADCANONS/IDEAS if you wanna do both I'd LOVE to hear!) I've been meaning to inbox you for days actually! Just couldn't seem to get myself to do so relating to mental health crisis haha. I'm hoping I'll be able to reach out WAY MROE OFTEN just to remind you I am here!! Really always excited/interested in what you have to say even if I've not expressed it forwardly back at least this way uuhh uh. You can ignore this </3 I know it's been hard lately!

Stay strong !!

HII !!!! HI HELLOO HIII !!!! :DDDD

ouhhh goodness i adore thiz question – i love listening to muzic and thinking about theze lozerz X33 I JUST NEVER GET THE CHANCE TO CUZ NO ONE AROUND CAREZ ABOUT THEMMM >X[

i actually have quite a lot but i cant just go on a 3 hour analysis of all the onez . so might az well give you the short n sweet of it – i really wouldn't want to waste your precious time ahaha ¥_^

★ "505" – Arctic Monkeys ; probably my favorite on the list but itz also one of the most SELF INDULGENT

the lyricz are just really fitting with my vizion of them – the lyricz "I'm going back to 505 // If it's a seven hour flight or a forty-five minute drive // In my imagination, you're waitin' lyin' on your side // With your hands between your thighs" fit with the fact they really love one another tremendously – their devotion

also the lyricz "Not shy of a spark // The knife twists at the thought that I should fall short of the mark // Frightened by the bite, though it's no harsher than the bark // The middle of adventure, such a perfect place to start" and "But I crumble completely when you cry // It seems like once again you've had to greet me with goodbye // I'm always just about to go and spoil the surprise // Take my hands off of your eyes too soon" LIKE I DUNNO HOW TO EXPLAIN THEZE BUT THEY REALLY REALLY DOMAKE ME THINK OF THEM ........

★ "I Wanna Be Yours" – Arctic Monkeys [dont ask why i associate them with Arctic Monkeys so much . okay ???]

y'know how Colin tendz to talk a lot about how clever and cool and useful he iz ? i think thiz song iz very fitting to how he'd want to be like . useful for Tone – the peak of intimacy iz to be uzed . something something etcetera

★ "As The World Caves In" – Matt Maltese

fitting from Tonyz perspective . in my opinion – how he'd want to spend hiz remaining time alongside Colin . even if . in the grand scheme of everything . itz such a small speck ; how Colin makez Tony feel fulfilled . and how even when all run out of time . hez happy to have spent it together – none wasted

★ a couple of honorable mentionz that i won't go in depth on :

– "Cigarettes out the Window" – TV Girl [mostly cuz i wanna do an in-depth au related analysis on it sometime in the mear future]

– "Show Me How" – Men I Trust [would like to analyze thiz one too but can't really see myself doing it ; the lyricz "Tell me why // Your hands are cold" are rlly hv digitaltime though i swear]

– "Daisy Bell" – Harry Dacre [iz thiz in part cuz Colin iz a computer ? if i answer that question truthfully . you'll chase me with pitchforkz]

– "My Love Mine All Mine" – Mitski [i can't go in depth about thiz without bursting into tearz ; i really love it]

– "Lovers Rock" – TV Girl [im scared of talking about love ; love iz very scary to me]

– "P.U.N.K Girl" – Heavenly

– "Who Knew" – The Correspondents [a relatively new song ive started listening to and i hadn't had the chance to properly dissect the lyricz and analyze them – but . since it remindz me of me n my lover . therez a 90-ish% chance it remindz me of them too]

TYSM FOR THE ASK AGAIN !!!!!!!!! I LITERALLY LOVE TALKING ABOUT DIGITALTIME – THEZE FREAKZ ALWAYZ LINGER IN MY MIND !!!!!!!!!!! IVE BEEN SO STUMPED WHEN IT COMEZ TO IDEAZ TO WRITE AND / OR DRAW THEM SO JUST GETTING TO GET SOMETHING OUTTA MY BRAIN IZ REALLY GOOD

TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF CUZ ILYSM !!!!!! YOU HAVE NO CLUE HOW HAPPY THIZ ASK ACTUALLY MADE ME . SO THANK YOU <33

[haloberry]

Ya’ll would never believe me, but THE DRIVER by Måneskin is how I believe Q!Tubbo views his personal relationships.

“Give me eyes, then twist the knife” 2nd line in the song, how he views practically all relationships, since he knows loving is something that is inherently dangerous— whether he loves or someone else loves him.

People that love him, despite how much he begs for it, should never take it any farther than surface level or else they risk having to stab him or themselves in back by a higher power.

“Put me under your spell, then hide the crime” Tubborucho. The crime being shoving Tubbo’s ass into the freezer.

The bridge “Bare your soul 'til it's naked, Bite my lip 'til you break it, Steal my heart, get it wasted, Don't do it slow” THIS IS HOW HE VIEWS PURGATORY, SPECIFICALLY PURG 2.

He was allowed to be as selfish as he wanted, to be a beast to the game and do anything to win. After all ‘Can’t end on a loss’. He loved the blood, the thrill, the challenge, and he would never want that to change. (He needed it, to remind himself his empathy is his weakness no matter how much a part of him it is.)

The chorus. “If you gonna set fire to the night, Baby, let me be the lighter” How he views Morning Crew, since he would forever devout himself to their cause and while he can’t ever let himself call them family, they are. They are both his matches, are only a simply ‘yes’ is needed for him to completely give his free will to them.

“If you're already high and you wanna fly, I'll be the hit that takes you higher” I specifically view this one as SoulHunters, because it really is letting them both enable each other at their worst, ESPECIALLY IN PURGATORY, but also knowing that no matter how much they argue, they are ride AND die for one another.

“If you wanna love when you touch the sky, You can be my midnight rider” Frubbo.. the more underlying toxic version of it. The verison of Frubbo that while they do both love each other, they both are using each other as a distraction/escape to not think about their past as much.

“If there's nowhere to go when you wanna go wild, I wanna be the driver” Tubbo and his need to be irreplaceable, but also more specifically Tubbo and Sunny. Tubbo, who will raise his child the best he can and, even if the world turns her away, he will be the pillar of support she could always rely on. Technically also Sunshine family.

It’s so him coded but I feel like the only one who feels this way—

[lieutgore]

graham gore of course for the ask game <3

thank u for this one !! ok ok ok

First impression: i know it can't be love at first sight with everyone but i was really fond of this guy on my first watch. for his TWO episodes. when I saw the title of the second episode I was genuinely excited because certainly he was going to be the focus and. welp. they fucking got his ass. I thought he was a sweetheart though, taken too soon 😔

Impression now: I've been developing him in my head for a straight month now and I still love him. Still a sweetheart. At first I only thought his death was unfortunate but now I know it was a legitimate tragedy for the entire expedition. Like can you imagine how much better they would've fared when conditions worsened if Lieutenant Graham Gore had been there?? ugh.

Favorite moment: I really like his background presence in Collins' diving scene. The head tilt, the flask handoff to Dundy (and the consequent grip dundy has on his hand for seemingly no reason), idk. Love him. There's also all these brief looks between him and Fitzjames-- some of which can be read as Graham seeking reassurance from James when he doesn't trust Franklin's / anyone else's orders. I also think the intense Stare he gives Franklin when he tells the lieutenants they should be all cheer is a little crazy. idk. the nuance is insane

Idea for a story: ooooo I really wanna write a piece with him at carnivale. i need to put his ass in a costume. alternatively I want to see his devotion to James get explored more because he looks at that man like he puts the stars in the sky it's sick and twisted !!

Unpopular opinion: I don't think I have any unpopular opinions about this guy tbh. I don't like it when people make him mean though, his ass would never. wait ok actual mildly unpopular opinion: I don't go crazy for goodgore, it's not really my thing.

Favorite relationship: i'm tied 50/50 between his relationship with James and what he’s got going on with Dundy. idk in my head they're a three-headed dog. but graham and dundy are also james' dogs. like it's complicated. The devotion that runs between them is crazy though.

Favorite headcanon: I think he would've handed Hickey's ass to him if it came to that. can anyone hear me down here. Like he's kind but kindness doesn't mean an incapacity for violence 🫶 Graham’s a great officer, not only by the Navy's standards, but the standards of his own subordinates as well. He takes care of them. He protects them. I'd like to see Hickey try to pull a knife on him idk

[marsbar17]

OH yes please absolutely make a part two pretty please with a cherry on top 🥺💗

I gotchu babe 😘

More of the legends finding out that you're a ✨️masochist✨️

This is the next 5 legends in release order (excluding caustic and revenant, request if you wanna see them though)

Also apologies the pet names in other languages are mostly masculine but if your femme just imagiiiineee

CONTAINS: pain kinks, spanking, biting, praise, degrading, bruises, electric shocking, bondage, sexual torture, overstimulation, knifeplay, and scratching :)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

•Mirage

All he wants during sexy time is to worship you. You give in to his need for praise all the time so he might as well return the favor, in any way you want. When you tell him you want him to hurt you he's a bit hesitant, but realizes that pain isn't exclusively hardcore shit like slapping or punching you. He probably prefers marking you up with hickeys and small bites than other things.

"You're so pretty for me, baby. Now everyone will know you're mine."

There's never a moment where you don't have a hickey. Once they fade he just gives you more. Occasionally he will spank you lightly or bruise your hips from holding you but that's only when he's been really frustrated.

•Octane

He'll do anything to make you cum as fast as possible, and as many times as possible. If pain is your thing, he's all for it. Anything to feel you shaking and quivering in his arms. When you keep asking him to go harder, grab you, slap you, anything, he just laughs and smiles before obeying your demands. He loves that he can feel you squeeze around him everytime he spanks you.

"You're clenching around me, muñeco. You're a twisted little thing aren't you? I like it."

He spanks you, not super hard but fast and sharp. He'd probably be into knifeplay too. Any man with a butterfly knife is into knifeplay, I'm right. He leaves small scratches along your thighs, not enough to scar, just enough to bleed and sting.

•Wattson

Finally getting to write about my favorite character <33

She's a woman in stem, she's gonna be up for trying a variety of kinky things. That's my opinion on women in stem, coming from someone in stem. She's probably already brought up something like spanking, electric shocking, basically soft sexual torture. She'll tie you up and attach muscle stimulators to your thighs, watching you twitch uncontrollably. You're little "experimenting" sessions always end in you crying and overstimulated.

"Interesting... You're enjoying this quite a bit, aren't you, mon chéri? Want me to increase the intensity?"

None of it is done specifically with the intent to hurt you, or a need for power over you. She just wants to know all the ways your body responds to her torture. Spanking, overstimulation, bondage, electric shocks, muscle stimulation, None of it is specific painful, but it's so overwhelming that after a while you end up sore and sensitive.

•Crypto

Okay unpopular opinion but this man is pretty vanilla. He's not not super against trying new things but he probably draws the line at bondage and blindfolding. When you tell him about how you get turned on by pain he hesitates and looks uneasy, but he's reassured when you tell him it doesn't need to be super hardcore. He's more comfortable with the thought of light spanking than slapping you in the face or nipple clamps yknow. Feeling how you clench around him though, he might start spanking you harder.

"Y-you're squeezing me so much. 씨발~"

Just generally softer and lighter stuff. If he's close he might hold you hard enough to bruise but other than that he sticks to light spanking. My man has enough people he takes his anger out on (ahem ahem mirage and octane) so when it comes to you he just wants to feel loved and to make you feel loved.

•Loba

The trailer for Kill Code part 4 just came out as I'm writing this and like, my gurl needs some stress relief. The rage in this woman's body never ends man. She probably figured out your kink while fucking you to let off some steam and accidentally digging her nails a bit too hard into your skin. The way you squealed and whimpered made her think she hurt you at first and she stopped to check if you were okay. Once she saw how glazed over your eyes were though her concern turned to a sadistic look.

"Oh you liked that? I'm going to have fun with this, beautiful~"

Now that she knows she can let out a bit more rage on you and you'll gladly take it, she does all kinds of shit. Everything you can imagine pain wise, yeah. Obviously she doesn't want to scar you, at least not a lot, you're too beautiful to ruin just for temporary pleasure. So spanking, light scratching, overstimulation, biting, all that jazz.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I intended to post this a couple days ago but then I fucked up my sleep schedule and today I got my wisdom teeth out so I completely forgot jfbdbsjsk, lemme know if a part three is in order :)

[aftgficrec]

Hey! I love your page and getting fic recs! Do you have any fics where Neil goes or agrees to go to therapy? I’m good with Bee or someone else as the therapist too. It can be canon or an au. Thanks so much! :))

I was pleasantly surprised by how much we found for you! -A

previous recs:

‘another life to live��� here

‘Oakland’ here (completed)

‘you’ve been locked in here forever (and you just can’t say goodbye)’ here (updated)

‘If it means protecting you (I’ll pay my dues)’ here (updated)

‘Interlaced’ here (updated)

‘Regrowth,’ ‘To Be Close With You Is To Be Close With Myself,’ ‘I took a breath and took the knife,’ and ‘flashes of intimacy’ ch 4 here

‘call me in the afternoon’ here

‘The Wild Fox Den’ and ‘Roses Grow Between Bone’ here

‘(My Heart) Pierced By a Pin’ here (completed)

‘The Sun Still Rises’ here (updated)

‘day by day’ here

‘the shuffling of cards’ here

‘Ain’t it fun’ here

‘Breathe, idiot’ here

‘Healing’ series part 1 here, part 3 here (completed)

‘The Fear of Being Known’ here

‘That one party’ series and ‘keep telling me that it gets better (does it ever?)’ here

‘Affection can be shown in so many ways’ here

‘Ghost of You’ here 

‘Make This Leap (Geronimo)’ here

‘Tenuous’ here

‘There is Nothing You Can Say’ here (completed)

‘of ice blue eyes & twisted veins’ here

‘don't break the glass’ (completed) here

‘Bad Apple’ here 

‘Phantom Pains’ here

‘Therapy’ here

‘Birds of a Feather’ here (updated)

‘In which Neil had Aspergers and Andrew finds out.’ here 

‘For You I'd Bleed Myself Dry’ here (updated)

‘I Wanna Get Better’ here 

‘on the tip of my tongue (say something)’ parts 6 & 8 here

and more:

‘Ember’ here (completed)

‘leave the room (with a little dignity)’ here

‘Art Hoe’ here

‘Blame It On My Youth’ here (updated)

‘Black as is the Raven, He’ll Get a Partner’ (here)

‘Our body’ series, part 1 here, part 3 here, part 5 here

‘and all the roads will disappear’ here

‘crossed out’ here

‘Double Trouble’ series here

‘i had a dream (where you couldn't hear me screaming)’ and ‘hold me close, in fact bury me’ here 

‘Just closed eyes with nothing behind’ here

‘doubt thou the stars be fire’ here

‘SCAR TISSUE’ here

‘Lighter Fluid’ here

you may also like:

‘The Sound’ here

historians by cielalune [Rated M, 21508 Words, Complete, 2023]

He remembers when she didn’t smell of ash, but perfume. The times they’d play the radio to fill the quiet of the car, and she’d hum along. How she never missed a single exy practice, and cheered for him each time. She wasn’t all too different from Cass in the end. Just because she was dead didn’t mean she was buried. Five times Neil tries to come to closure about the person Mary Hatford was, and the one time he accepts who she came to be.

tw: heavily referenced child abuse, tw: heavily referenced rape/noncon, tw: heavily referenced csa, tw: heavily referenced self harm, tw: implied/referenced torture, tw: sleep paralysis, tw: depressive episode, tw: flashbacks with blood & gore, tw: panic attacks, tw: dissociation, tw: victim blaming

Mommy Dearest by chronically_peach [Rated G, 915 Words, Complete, 2022]

Neil doesn’t talk about his mother much but Andrew knows it’s a touchy subject for the redhead. After a session with Betsy Neil admits he’s been thinking about his mother and allows Andrew a glimpse into who Mary Hatford really was.

tw: implied/referenced child abuse

Pain of a Forgotten Face series by Rose_vine [Collection, 2 complete works, Updated 2021]

Part 1: Pain of a Forgotten Face [M, 3086 Words] Neil Josten is awoken by a face in his nightmares from twelve years ago, a face he barely remembers. When he tries to brush it off and go to practice, he realizes too late that some memories refuse to let themselves be forgotten.

tw: ptsd, tw: panic attacks, tw: nightmares, tw: hallucinations, tw: implied/referenced child abuse, tw: implied/referenced torture, tw: implied/referenced murder, tw: blood/gore

Part 2: A Hand to Hold Me Back From The Cliff [Not Rated, 2132 Words] After Neil collapses on the court from a flashback from when he was younger, Andrew convinces him to go to therapy. This is his first session with Bee, and it is only Andrew at his side that gives him the strength to walk through the door.

tw: ptsd, tw: implied/referenced child abuse

After the Beep by kanekei [Rated T, 1030 Words, Incomplete, Updated Sept 2023]

Neil works through his relationship with his dead mother by leaving her voice messages that she'll never hear. It’s healthy, Bee says. He can’t help but think having the Minyards as patients has skewed her perception of what that word means. The number you have reached is not available. Please leave your message after the beep.

tw: implied/referenced child abuse, tw: implied/referenced murder, tw: implied/referenced violence

The Foxes by akaashisramen [Not Rated, 3386 Words, Incomplete, Updated July 2023]

Trans Neil is on the run from his father and goes to his uncles house. His uncle promises him protection and allows him to play Exy as long as he goes to group therapy to process his mothers death.

tw: graphic depictions of violence, tw: graphic nightmares, tw: implied/referenced torture

someday, we'll grow by nopunintended [Rated G, 2078 Words, Complete, 2021]

Andrew and Neil see Betsy for a couple's therapy session per Andrew's request.

tw: implied/referenced child abuse

Couples Therapy by P0tatonoah [Rated T, 2014 Words, Complete 2020]

I got a lot of comments (like 3 or 4) on my breakup fic asking for a part 2 where Neil and Andrew patch things up and live happily ever after… This is not it. But you can read it as an alternative ending if you want. 

tw: implied/referenced nonconsensual touch, tw: implied/referenced violence

NB: find P0tatonoah’s andreil break up fic ‘Home...?’ here

They sicken of the calm, they who know the storm by EdgySpaghetti [Not Rated, 3162 Words, Complete, 2023]

After storm there always comes the sun. People born into the storm, who growing up sees only black clouds and lightnings striking everywhere, just learn how to live with it, how to protect themselves from cold, wind and rain. They recognize the pattern, know that lightning will struck sooner or later and are prepared for it. What are those people to do when there is no more dark clouds? They don't know how to live in this environment, how to dress to not get too hot and how to prevent potential sunburnt. They never had to do that before. They're still expecting the lightnings.

tw: ptsd, tw: anxiety, tw: implied/referenced torture, tw: anger issues

Can I finally stop running now? by gracefromspace [Rated T, 12110 Words, Complete, 2023]

Neil is intrigued by a blonde baker with piercings, two therapy cats and strong arms.

tw: heavily referenced torture, tw: flashbacks with blood/gore, tw: implied/referenced murder, tw: implied/referenced child abuse, tw: anxiety, tw: negative self image

can't blame it on my youth by PoolToast22 [Rated G, 2650 Words, Complete, 2022]

The one where Neil Josten is Fine TM. But he's also in therapy. And today Bee decided to ask him that question.

hold on to happiness by minyarday [Rated T, 551 Words, Complete, 2020]

"self esteem had never been something Neil cared about. when you are a runaway that don't even have a place to call home, you learn to prioritize certain things and forget others" only that now he has the time to think about it

I'll Come Back To You by mostly_maudlin [Rated T, 6900 Words, Complete, 2022]

Some of the things he’s learned today feel like stories about someone else: Neil switched to playing striker at a tiny high school in Arizona. Aaron lives in Chicago with his wife. Andrew’s cousin calls Neil every Tuesday, because Andrew is too stubborn to pick up the phone himself. But other things are clear truths, even if they’re more abstract: Neil’s mother died. Andrew is safe. Neil was supposed to stay, but part of him is gone. - - - - It's about dreams, reality, trust, patience, and determination. It's about making promises and keeping them. You'll figure out the rest.

tw: car accidents, tw: major character injury, tw: implied/referenced violence

I will help you swim by unojonex [Rated E, 11699 Words, Incomplete, Updated Oct 2022]

He’s slowed down, stayed in one place for more than a few months and it's all caught up with him. In his sleep, ghosts of his past haunt him. And they have no mercy. Dreams and imagination swirl together in a confusing mix of nightmares that don't go away, even when he's awake. -- basically Neil and Andrew getting together while also dealing with a lot of trauma

tw: ptsd, tw: implied/referenced rape/noncon, tw: implied/referenced csa, tw: implied/refererenced torture, tw: heavily referenced child abuse, tw: suicide ideation, tw: graphic nightmares with blood/gore, tw: dissociation, tw: hallucinations, tw: panic attacks

But Touch My Tears with Your Lips by transjorts [Rated M, 4070 Words, Complete, AFTG Mixtape Exchange 2022]

Andrew is sitting across from him, expression neutral, fork in hand. He’d dragged the tinnes across the plate—purposefully, if Neil had to guess. Andrew has already cut the burrito up into tiny pieces and spears one morsel on the fork, lifting it to his mouth. “Hi,” Neil says. Andrew chews, very deliberately. “Do you feel better?” Neil frowns. “What?” Andrew eats another bite. “Did all that running make you feel better?” Neil sighs and glances down, noticing that his water has been refilled. He takes a sip. “No.”

tw: implied/referenced torture, tw: implied/referenced sexual assault, tw: nightmares, tw: dissociation

let's just sit awhile by artiest [Rated M, 17291 Words, Complete. 2022, Locked]

Neil and Andrew don't have to keep fighting for their survival. They can settle now. It's hard, but they're trying. OR: During Neil's second year in Palmetto State, him and Andrew learn to take care of each other.

tw: severe mental health issues, tw: ptsd, tw: implied/referenced torture,  tw: nightmares with blood/gore, tw: flashbacks,  tw: dissociation, tw: violence, tw: homophobia, tw: implied/referenced rape/noncon, tw: implied/referenced csa, tw: vomit, tw: alcohol abuse/alcholism

I could never give you peace by freshtaylorswiftduck [Rated T, 3407 Words, Complete. 2022]

Neil has both bad and good days. Today is a bad day.

tw: implied/referenced abuse, tw: implied/referenced torture, tw: panic attacks

10 tips to stress less, without the tips by lumos_max [Rated T, 5404 Words, Complete, AFTG Exchange Fall 2020]

A lonely Neil lets his therapist bully him into checking out the clinic's support group without too much fuss, but little did he know he wouldn't be checking out the group that day, instead meeting a dramatic hunk of a man who drives a fancy car and forgets to wipe the cream off the corner of his lip. It's only fair that Neil tries to do it for him, right?

tw: implied/referenced abuse, tw: implied/referenced child abuse

“God, I have my father’s eyes.” by perks_of_being_a_writer [Rated T, 673 Words, Complete, 2022]

This is based on Family Line by Conan Gray. In this short story, Neil is at a therapy appointment where he and Betsy dive into his parental issues. This covers Neil’s abuse from both parents (because, yes, Mary was abusive and a bad mother). This is Neil learning that it's not his fault his parents hurt him and accepting that he is loved.

tw: implied/referenced child abuse

"There's blood on my/your hands." by markonasurface (idwir) [Rated T, 4667 Words, Complete, 2018]

The year after his 19th birthday, the other team decides to recreate the bloody locker scene complete with a ‘Happy Birthday, Jr.’ Instead of stuffing everything down, Neil has a complete freak out and sinks into a depression.

tw: suicidal thoughts, tw: blood, tw: panic attacks, tw: ptsd, tw: major depressive episode, tw: homophobia, tw: disordered eating, tw: vomit

Nothing is Safe series by hismiley16 [Rated T/M/E, Collection, 7 complete works, Updated July 2023]

Parts 3 and 7 recced here

Part 4: Written On His Skin [Not Rated, 11344 Words] The Foxes face the Ravens for the first time since Riko's death and things go as well as expected. Andrew is mildly injured on the court and isn't there to protect Neil when the new Evermore captain comes for him after the game. The team sees more than Neil ever wanted them to, including the ghost of Nathaniel he thought he'd buried in Baltimore.

tw: vomit, tw: bullying, tw: nonconsensual touch/assault  tw: dissociation, tw: graphic depictions of violence, tw: blood, tw: implied/referenced child abuse, tw: implied/referenced torture, tw: implied/referenced murder, tw: implied/referenced animal death, tw: implied/referenced self harm, tw: implied/referenced rape/noncon

The Josten Anxiety Method by orphan_account [Rated M, 1721 Words, Complete, 2022]

Neil talks to Bee about his anxiety.

tw: anxiety, tw: hallucinations, tw: dissociation, tw: panic attacks, tw: implied/referenced abuse

Looking in the Mirror Never Felt so Good by Trimorphia [Rated T, 8693 Words, Complete, 2023]

Neil Josten's journey to becoming a real person.

tw: nightmares, tw: panic attacks, tw: implied/referenced abuse

Achilles Come Down by infernalstars [Rated M, 5017 Words, Complete, 2020]

Neil Josten was a liar before he was anything else. In the nest, sometimes his choices were between lying and dying. He’d had a decent amount of self preservation that he’d chosen the former. But now, being free, the world felt so heavy. He wished he’d chosen dying.

tw: graphic depictions of violence, tw: graphic suicide attempt, tw: self harm, tw: blood, tw: eating disorders focus, tw: ptsd, tw: implied/referenced abuse, tw: vomit, tw: depression 

prompt: Neil x therapy bullet fic by @sadboyayeron [Tumblr, 2020]

[gumdropsss]

If You Cry, I'll Cry

TW: self-harm, detailed description of cuts/scars, blood, knives, stained carpet, sorry for any mistakes.

reader has no menitioned gender.

note: currently writing this with hot cheeto fingers, pls pray for my keyboard

note: I am no longer writing with hot cheeto fingers, but I am writing with cramps worse than a limb being ripped off <333

♡♡♡

"I don't even know why I opened my fucking eyes.." You moped around your room. It was unusually messy, for you atleast. Jax had already tried to open the door a couple times with his spare keys, yet you used your body strength to keep his sorry ass out.

"I'm not worthy of breathing."

You walked to the bathroom, and opened the cabinet that stood in front of you. You grabbed a little knife out. "Perfect." You sliced open your skin 5 times, letting the blood drip into the sink. Each plop made a 'doink' sound. The cutting never hurts as much as the washing..

"I'll just get an infection, i don't wanna wash these.."

Your arms were covered from your palm to the end of your forearm, with cuts. They went deep into the skin, making scars that looked like dry skin. you peeled open a dry scab out of boredom. You sighed, letting that drip into the sink as well.

"I'm too fucking tired for this bullshit.."

You walked out of the bathroom, blood staining the carpet of the floor. You got into bed, pulled the blanket over you, and closed your eyes.

--x--

'Jesus.. whats all that racket..?' you thought, opening your eyes. You could hear two people bantering outside, before it stopped. there was a quick twist on your door handle and it creaked open, then you could see Gangle peer through the crack, her hands on the side of the door. "D-darling..?" Gangle looked distressed as she opened the door a little more.

"May I uhm.. Come in?"

You gently smiled despite the pain of the cuts on your arm. Gangle always knew to respect your privacy, but she also knew she couldn't just.. leave you. "Sure, just.. uhm.. stay near the door, please.." You mumbled. Gangle did so, and walked in. She closed the door behind her and locked it.

"You're not okay, Sweetheart.."

Gangle sat on the side of the bed, ignoring your pleas to stay near the door. "And I know this.. I was just too afraid to say anything." You panicked a bit, seeing how close Gangle was from seeing the mess on the floor, and the bed. "Yeah, uh-huh.." You nervously laughed, which it seemed Gangle caught onto that.

"You're.. not hiding anything, are you?"

Gangle's eyes narrowed. She looked.. disappointed. "Why would I hide anything from my beloved..?" you mumbled. Gangle huffed, and got off the side of the bed. She then walked around to the side you were on, and her eyes widened. The blood that stained the carpet was (unfortunately) still visible.. "I-I was just uhm.. hurt a little.. Scraped my knee.." You smiled with a nervousness that could only be described as 'pls dont check pls dont check'. And guess what? Gangle checked. She removed the covers from you, and looked at your legs. She huffed again with even more disappointment.

"Don't you start lying to me.."

Gangle was obviously still worried about you, yet she had to atleast project some annoyance in her voice to tell you how disappointed she is that you were lying. You had your arms up to your chest, but it was only a matter of time before Gangle got suspicious of that. "I'm not hiding anything from you, Love.." Gangle looked at your eyes. "Show me those." She pointed to your arms that were tucked into your chest. "Could you- uh.. tell me what 'those' are?" "Arms. Show me, now." Gangle put her hands on her.. hips? whatever, she was mad. "I said now." You were.. ashamed of yourself now. But, despite being ashamed, you showed her anyways. You brought your arms up from your chest, and you could see where the blood now stained your nightgown. You turned your arms toward her, and mumbled a soft,

"Sorry.."

Gangle's eyes went wide once again, this time with a horrified expression. You could tell she was worried for you, but she also looked like she was gonna vomit. The brownish red scabs from old cuts, and the new ones from earlier, and the red that stained your arms.. it was all disgusting, but expressed a lot. It expressed how much you felt like a failure, or how you felt like you were just empty mass. Gangle's happy mask dropped. It didn't break, but it dropped off onto the floor with a 'clink'. She started to sob, and she took your arms gently into her ribbon hands. "Why..?" Tears fell from Gangle's eyes like a waterfall. Yet after awhile she stopped. This moment was about you.

You could hear Gangle huff.

She sat down next to you, taking your arms in her hands. She softly caressed the wounds, but not with pressure. She just.. Wanted to feel them. "I'm.. sorry I didn't notice it sooner." Gangle's voice was more toned down, and calm. "I truly am sorry." She gently put her 2d mouth onto the cuts, to gesture a kiss. The soft and cold mask touched your skin like you could break at any second. "Ribbon, I'm sorry.." You looked at the celing with guilt plastered on your face. "I should've told you.." Gangle turned her head towards your face. She took one hand off of your arms to turn your face toward her. "I know you probably wouldn't have anyways, so.. don't sweat it. I know I wouldn't wanna tell anyone that I did something bad.." She chuckled, then sighed.

"Is there anything else I should know about?"

You looked at Gangle's eyes. "No.. But.. Can we not talk about this right now..? I just.. It's a lot." You looked away, tears pooling in your eye sockets. Gangle looked at you, then pulled you up off of the bed. "let's wash these off.." Gangle's ribbon hand wrapped around your wrist gently as she guided you to your bathroom.

"It's cold.."

The water ran over your cuts like a soft breeze. It made your arms tremble. Once washed, Gangle patted the cuts with a warm towel to dry them. She wrapped your delicate arms in gauze and tape. Gangle guided you back to the bed, holding you as if you would run off if she didn't. She lied you down, and then climbed into bed with you. "I'm sorry.." Gangle sighed. "there's nothing to be sorry for, Dove.." It was obvious Gangle was having trouble saying the right thing.

"You don't have to say anything.."

Gangle looked at the floor.

"You being here is.. already enough."

taglist: @beesofink

[ladysomething]

I know I said I wanted it to be bigger than I love you but I also said I trusted you even if it was and as always you delivered because my heart was absolutely broken with how raw his confession was and how it was answered and I think maybe because just like Charles I didn't fully understand how bad it was, it's like I could see why he was scared for Charles but I couldn't fully understand it but this chapter it finally clicked.

I feel like Charles will be pushed into retirement after this season wether he wins it or not and what happened this chapter will be used against him.

Also I think Jean luc is on Max's side but he can also understand Charles that's why everytime he does one of his stupid plans he doesn't yell at him, sure he tells him Max is good but he doesn't show much anger towards him because he can see the fear Charles is dealing with, but I think this time he's gonna be upset with Charles because of what he said to Max.

It would be nice if once Sophi is talking about being an omega with Charles, she also mentions the part that Max is conflicted to show Charles, the part that despite showing it in the past and revealing the reason behind it Charles through his anger and fear completely ignored it and I don't think he's gonna get this part of Max back easily, he absolutely shattered his heart into pieces and destroyed his trust, worst than that he compared him to his dad. Max have had all these insecurities about wether he turns into a monster like Jos or not and despite working hard and believing in himself for all he's done what Charles said it's gonna break him.

I kinda wanna smack Charles because of what he said to Max after Max pour his heart out for him but at the same time I can see why he acted the way he did, he's already confuse and scared and suddenly everything he knew was wrong, he has been taking care of himself on his own for too long that he only believes in what he thinks is right and having Max of all people caring for him, loving him is far from a truth he used to believe in. And everyone constantly keeps everything from him to protect him in their words which makes the truth more unbelievable for him.

And Max, god the way you wrote him and his confession made me almost crying for him I mean I did cry a bit cause the way he knows Charles won't love him back,the way accepted that and then Charles once again accuses him of being someone, something he hates the most in the world and that's where it breaks him and we see the look of betrayal he felt in that moment.

I just want to hug them and give them a happy moment like I don't even know if Max will be in Charles dream this time or if Charles can finally try to understand Max, if he will try to reach him this time. And it's just so heartbreaking seeing their pain being mostly cause by the world around them but consciously and unconsciously they are the ones who twist the knife more and hurt each other more.

And omg the team with that contract,like wtf I wrong with you all,I kinda wish Max would have told him despite Charles believing it or not, he deserved to know what was happening to him and his life especially after Max realized Charles is gonna doe everything to be out of that contract,I know he wanted Charles to want this himself and believed him when he was sweet to him even if a part was actually the truth,and completely understand why he kept it secret but the way Charles realized how far everything about his life was out of him hands now god that was hurtful almost as much as his cruel words towards Max...

This was such a beautiful Chapter that I'm at awe. I don't what to say to show much I loved it I don't think if I can find enough words for, I just know that I'm gonna start the next Chapter with watery eyes while feeling anxious for what would be the next step fro them. Thank you so much for this beautiful chapter the way each part of can make me feel emotional is truly an art. Your writing style is also beautiful💛

I've been waiting for you anon!!! I was desperate to know what you thought, and whether I'd earned your trust!!

I can't say anything re retirement the season obvs, but you would be right in assuming that the stakes are that high.

JL has kind of become the meat in the sandwich tbh. I feel for the poor guy. justice for jean-luc!

and Charles definitely went too far, but then again, Max certainly didn't give him any reasons to pull his punches. he said "you have all these terrible qualities but its ok I still love you :)" and then expected Charles to be nice about it??? come on now.

but then again, Max is just trying his best. he's a fucked up little dude, and doesn't really understand what Charles' problem is - refuses to understand what Charles' problem is - so if he doesn't want to meet Charles halfway, then why should Charles be the one who has to do it?

but!! they're getting there. at least now Charles actually knows some stuff, and he has space to think about it a bit more.

and thank you for your kind words. I appreciate them very much.

[angelsdevils]

A Titan's Heartache: Marcel x Reader

If you want to read the disclaimer please go to the initial Master list for this story.

Warning: Spoilers appear in this. If you do not want to be tagged or don't want to be spoiled please do not read this story

Word Count:

Master List | Prologue | Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 |

If you wanna be tagged, let me know

Tag List: @missmadness123 @galactict3a @pseudophyllus @staymoarmyzen @black0pirate0cat @rl800 @reiners-milkbiddies @bobateasilverpearl @sapphire-gemm @beansofskittles cockonoi @mochalate @sunaraii

[Marcel’s POV]

It was now year 847 and I joined the 104th Regiment Corps with Reiner, Bertholdt and Annie. After realizing that we would have more information after joining the Military Police we all agreed this would be the best action to take for now. We also decided to take our time with the mission to ensure it was a successful mission. I still carried the weight with the other warriors of the mission that had already taken a toll on our mental state. I still remember seeing all the people getting eaten by the titans. Me and Annie were running for our lives literally because we couldn’t just transform into titans like Bertholdt and Reiner was or else someone would have seen us. 

The sun bathed the training grounds in a golden hue, my gaze lingered on the towering walls of the military complex - a symbol of both the protection and confinement. I understood why the walls were necessary, to protect them from titans but at the same time, it was suffocating. Of course it was, but some people were content but I met a guy named Eren Yeager, who planned to join the scouts so he could fight for freedom. The kid is crazy, but I get it completely. In a way the Eldians of Marley were also stuck behind walls, not literally but the Marleyans treat us as monsters. I just had to remember I was doing this for my family so they could have a little more freedom.  

Morning drills echoed with the rhythm of wood meeting wood, panting, and grunts, the cadence of footsteps resonating with hope and aspirations to be great soldiers, though I was no soldier, I was a Marleyan Warrior. Amidst the training, my gaze fell upon her - (Y/N) (L/N) -  a fellow recruit whose roots seemed to intertwine with the very essence of nature. Little did I know that our paths were destined in ways I would never imagine. 

In the moments of our exercises, our eyes met. She gave me the sweetest of smiles, and I swear my heart almost jumped out of my chest. She had an air of mystery surrounding her, and I was falling in love with her with just a simple look. As the sun casted it’s rays down on us, she glowed in the light. She was soon paired with me as a sparring partner, and I wasn’t sure if I would survive this alone with how fast my heart was racing. For only the time being, I forgot all about my mission. 

“Don’t expect me to go easy on you, just because you are a girl,” I said to her. Her laughter filled the air, and I felt my cheeks warm.

“If you went easy on me, this sparring session would be pointless.”

She left me no time to respond as she charged at me. I dodged her movements, but she was like water flowing freely. She twisted her body, knocking my knife out of my hand. I grabbed her wrist, but she flipped over my shoulder, and held her wooden knife to my throat. I went to elbow her but she dodged my attack. 

We caught the attention of the other trainees, and the Chief instructor, Shadis. I managed to grab my wooden knife, but she was quicker. How could someone be so fluid in their motions and quick at the same time? Her fighting style was different yet beautiful, almost like a dance. Lost in my thoughts and going through the motions, she managed to swipe my feet from under me, and pinned me to the ground, her wooden knife once again to my throat.

“I think I win this one,” she said in a teasing tone. I cracked a smile, before rolling us over so I pinned her down instead. 

“I don’t accept defeat that easily,” I retorted. 

“Maybe you should.” 

“Huh?” I was confused, before she head butted me hard and I fell backwards, “Ow.”  I rubbed my head, but she kicked me on my back, her boot on my chest, and she stood up. I was shocked, and blushed as she looked down at me. 

“Accept defeat?”

“Yeah, I accept defeat. I think I need ice for my forehead.” 

She let me up, and smiled. She offered me a hand, and I took it standing up. 

“(L/N), where did you learn those moves?” Chief instructor asked her, and she saluted him.

“Sir, my mother and grandmother taught me. They both joined the scouts.” 

“I see, I knew your last name sounded familiar. You have a head jump on the rest of trainees then, your grandmother and mother were (mother’s name) and (grandmother’s name) right? They were one of the founders of the scouts, as well as the strongest.”

“Yes, sir.” 

Everything made sense now, she has trained probably since she was so young, her family probably taught her how to be graceful yet deadly. Shadis walked away after they were done talking. She turned to me and gave me that sweet smile again, and I smiled back. 

“My name is Marcel, Marcel Galliard.”

“(Y/N) (L/N), nice to meet you Marcel.” 

She walked away to grab her water bottle, and in that moment I forgot about the mission, my thoughts were on her alone.

©[@angelsdevils] all rights reserved. none of my posts or stories should be modified, reposted, etc. I do not own the character or the fanart, but I own the plots of these stories. All fanart goes to their appropriate owners.

[spacefinch]

Pokemon Incorrect Quotes: Unova Edition

Hugh: *handing out smiley balloons* I have no soul. Have a nice day!

Colress: I don't have one either.

Drayden: Let me see what you have!

Iris: A knife!

Drayden: NO!

Cilan: Fun fact! Blueberries are the only fruit named after a color.

Iris: Star fruit?

Cilan: ♥️ So close! That is a shape ♥️

Colresss: Welcome to physics!

*science project explodes*

*screaming*

Hilda: 🎶 ANNIE ARE YOU OKAY, ANNIE ARE YOU OKAY, ANNIE 🎶

Hilbert: *banging pots and pans*

Hilda: 🎶 ANNIE ARE YOU OKAY, WILL YOU TELL US THAT YOU’RE OKAY 🎶

Teacher: Uh, Cheren, can you read number 23 for the class, please?

Cheren: No, I cannot. What up, I’m Cheren, I’m 19, and I never fricking learned how to read.

Chili: Hi, welcome to Chili's.

Elesa: Hey, I’m lesbian.

Emmet: I thought you were Unovan.

Clay: I wanna be a cowboy, baby!

Alder: Hell yeah!

Clay:  I wanna be a cowboy, baby!

Hilbert: TOMORROW IS HALLOWEEN

Cheren: Why are you guys reblogging this in December?

Hilda: TOMORROW IS HALLOWEEN

Rosa: TOMORROW IS HALLOWEEN

Cheren: It is February, you ANIMALS

Nate: TOMORROW IS HALLOWEEN

Emmet: "Average person eats 8 spiders a year" factoid, actually statistical error. Average person eats 0 spiders per year. Spiders Georg, who lives in cave and eats over 10,000 every day, is an outlier and should not have been counted.

Chili: Oh sorry, I fell asleep while I was waiting on you to make me a sandwich.

Cress: Go back to sleep AND STARVE.

Ingo: Perhaps it is the context in which words are spoken that gives them the power of meaning. *yelling* I LOVE YOU, JOLTIK!

Emmet, banging on pots and pans: I DON'T GET NO SLEEP 'CAUSE OF YOU! Y'ALL NOT GONNA GET NO SLEEP 'CAUSE OF ME!

Hilda: Would you like something to drink? *opens fridge* We have water, milk, juice, Joltiks, Dr. Pepper…

Cheren: Joltiks?

Hilda: Joltiks it is, then.

Cheren: Wait, that’s not what I meant—

But she was already pouring him a brimming glass of Joltiks.

Ingo and Emmet: *in the middle of an intense Pokemon battle*

Hilbert: Can I get a waffle? Can I PLEASE get a waffle?

After said battle:

Hilbert, pointing at the losing Pokemon: He need some milk

Ingo: Road work ahead? Uh, yeah, I sure hope it does!

Rosa (pointing at a flock of Swanna): Look at all those chickens!

Ingo: *filming in selfie mode*

Emmet: (in background) Bop it! Twist it! Pull it!

Colress (grinning): I'M GOING TO JAIL!

Cheren: Tumblr is just talking to yourself but with an audience.

Cilan: That’s called a soliloquy.

Cheren: Found the theater kid. Get em boys.

Iris: Hey OP, how do we know you’re not a theater kid?

Cheren: I’M AN ENGLISH LIT MAJOR, YOUR HONOR

Cilan: Eating chips with chopsticks is unironically galaxy brain. Your fingers don’t get greasy and it lasts for longer.

Chili: Fork

Cilan: Oh, yeah, I’m going to stab my crunchy foods and make them fall apart like an absolute absentminded dunce, fool, clown, jester, like a monstrous moron, an idiot of Shakespearean proportions, a cretin.

Cress: Um, you seem to forget that ‘chips’ can also mean fries. And that’s probably what he was talking about, haha

Cilan: I did not forget anything. I purposely ignore the idea of using British vocabulary to do my part in helping it die out.

Cilan: KNOWLEDGE is knowing that a tomato is technically a fruit.

Cress: WISDOM is not putting it in a fruit salad.

Chili: PHILOSOPHY is wondering if a tomato is a fruit, does that make ketchup a smoothie?

Cheren: COMMON SENSE is knowing that ketchup isn't a smoothie.

Ingo: I went to the store and bought Quick Oats. The next day, my brother came back with Instant Oats. I will not be humiliated like this. I must now find an even sooner oat.

Hilbert: I hope nobody is evil

Ghetsis: >:)

Hilbert: Oh no

Elesa: Don’t post your negativity on a positive post.

Volkner: Electrons

Elesa: I should kick your ass.

Cilan: Being alive is great because there are so many different vegetables you can sauté. But then there are also the horrors.

Cheren: People who say ‘oof’ and people who say ‘bruh’ contribute nothing to a conversation.

Nate: OOF

Hilbert: BRUH

Ingo: Early to bed, early to rise, Burger King burger with Burger King fries

Skyla: Later to rise, later to bed, Burger King burger on Burger King bread

Elesa: Eat at morning, eat at night, I participate in a Burger King fight

Emmet: I slap my knees, I slap my thighs, tonight is the night that Burger King dies

Cheren: I currently have seven empty notebooks and I have no clue what to put in them.

Cilan: Put spaghetti in it.

Cheren: I am currently taking suggestions from everyone except you.

Bianca: Put spaghetti in it.

Cheren: I am currently taking suggestions from everyone except you two.

Nate: Put spaghetti in it.

Cheren: I am no longer taking suggestions.

Roxie: *playing guitar*

*suspicious crashing noises in distance*

Roxie: *plays guitar louder*

Hilbert: Big mood.

Emmet: What does that mean?

Hilbert: Well… it means, me too, I guess.

*the next day*

Ingo: I'm worried about Team Rocket using our subway system.

Emmet: Big mood, brother. Big mood.

Ingo: HILBERT WHAT HAVE YOU DONE

Hilbert: Z is just a sideways N

N: Please stop it

Hilbert: Zo

Elesa: I can't find my earbuds and Target is closed. This is a nightmare.

Burgh: Put a Durant in each ear and they will sing to you.

Elesa: Not a half-bad idea actually.

Emmet: I go to Home Depot

Emmet: I eat the tools

Ingo: Stop it

Emmet: Crumch

Roxie: Is it cheating to teach Toxic to every member of my Pokemon team?

Elesa: Not at all, I'd love to hear them sing it.

Clay: None of y’all know what propaganda actually is, do you?

Hilda: It’s when a British person takes a good look at something.

Elesa: What are you guys going to be for Halloween?

Ingo: Sad

Burgh: Gay

Skyla: Sexy

Emmet: Goblin

Ingo: What if I was evil and ran towards you at very fast speeds

Emmet: My arms are strong, I would catch you and hug you

Clay: Children, this is dirt.

Nate, Rosa, and Hugh: dirt? dirt? dirt? dirt? dirt?

Hilda: Shoutout to all the people who started saying “same” as a joke once in a while but now use it for the most random things like a car honking their horn at another car.

Cheren: Yesterday a book fell off my desk but instead of picking it up, I just looked at it for a second and said “same”

Hilbert: LOL same

Bianca: Why are we like this?

Cheren: Is there anything better than pussy?

Cheren: Yes, a really good book

Cheren: *plays the keyboard*

Hilbert: Who’s the hottest Uber driver you’ve ever had?

N: Ummm… I never went to Oovoo Javer.

*HAS NEVER WENT TO OOVOO JAVER*

Looker: Where’s the best place to buy fireworks?

Hugh: Wouldn’t you like to know, weather boy?

Looker: Where are your parents? Kid’s sketchy, back to you.

Emmet: *screams into jar and then screws on the lid* Everything’s fine.

Cilan: Hi, could I ask how exactly does one accidentally set a lemon on fire?

Nate: Microwave for 40 minutes

Cilan: Why were you microwaving a lemon??

Nate: I read boiling lemons helps cover up bad smells (I wanted to cover up the scent of burnt oranges), but I didn’t own any pots.

Cilan: Did you burn an orange too? How??

Nate: Microwave for 40 minutes

Classroom: *silence*

One of the students: turgle turgle

Cheren: WHO TURGLED

Hilda: Hey everyone, today my brother pushed me, so I'm starting a Kickstarter to put him down. Benefits of killing him would be that I get pushed way less—

Cheren: I get that you're angry, but killing Hilbert is not the solution.

Hilbert: When will Ted himself finally show up to the talk?

Bianca: The final boss

Cheren: Guys, you do realize that TED stands for Technology, Entertainment, and Design, right?

Hilda: I will not let Ted hide behind these lies any longer.

Cheren: I love the word methinks. It’s accurate. Me does think. Thinketh me do.

Hilbert: Methinks therefore me am.

Nate (bragging.): I know every digit of pi.

Nate: I don't know what order.

N: He doesn't know what order.

"Hey besties friendly reminder to drink water, feed your lab Rattata, turn off your evil nuclear generator, change out of your dirty lab coat, go for a walk, and take care of yourself!"

“@evilscientist13”

“@evilscientist13”

“@evilscientist13”

“COLRESS WAKE UP”

“@evilscientist13”

“@evilscientist13”

“@evilscientist13”

“COLRESS THE REACTOR”

(during a game of Uno)

Ingo: Brother, please, no.

Emmet: I’m sorry. I have to.

Ingo: Please, I’m begging you, after all we’ve been through?

Emmet: I’m sorry. [places a draw 4 card] Uno.

N: Any questions before I move on?

Porygon: *garbled electric noises*

N: ... Great. I really understood that well.

Elesa: This is camp.

Ingo: What does camp mean?

Emmet: Like when something is so yass and slay

Emmet: Do you think Joltiks take fall damage?

Ingo: Emmet, what the heck?

*at Drayden’s home in Opelucid City*

The Pokemon streaming service profiles read as follows:

Drayden: “Person who pays for the account”

Iris: “Granddaughter (Free pass)”

Ingo: “Parasite 1”

Emmet: “Parasite 2”

Cheren: How long does someone have to be dead before it's considered archaeology and not grave robbing?

Lenora: As an archaeologist, I find this a VERY AWKWARD QUESTION.

Cheren: Answer the question, grave robber.

Elesa: Carpe diem— seize the day

Skyla: Carpe noctem— seize the night

Emmet: Carpe natem— seize the ass

Ingo: Seriously, if you guys don't stop reblogging this, I am going to carpe someone's neck and break it.

Grimsley: Carpe collum— seize the neck

Cheren: Not all math puns are bad.

Cheren: Just sum of them.

Roxie: There is so much panic right now and not nearly enough disco.

Elesa: Where do bad rainbows go?

Skyla: …

Elesa: Prism. It's a light sentence.

Skyla: *groan*

Hilda: If you don't know the difference between "their," "they're", and "there", your a idiot.

Cheren: Well, this is awkward.

Hilbert: I was born ready!

Hilda: You were born in Nuvema Town.

Hilbert: When I was your age… (tells Hilda something he did a few minutes ago)

Nate: A theif

Cheren: Thief?

Nate: Theif

Cheren: I before e, except after c

Nate: Thceif

Cheren: No

Hilda: (singing) A potato flew around my room before you came—

Hilda, Hilbert, Cheren, and Bianca: AAAAAAAHHHHHH!

Hilbert: I'm nuts about these nuts. But you know what I'm also nuts about? My close good friends!

Hilbert: *gestures to Hilda, Cheren, Bianca, Nata, Rosa, Hugh, and N* My close good friends!

Ghetsis: Remember one time I liked you?

N: No.

Ghetsis: Good, because IT NEVER HAPPENED! *evil laugh*

Cilan: Would anyone like some stew? Would anyone like some stew? Would anyone like some stew?

[unreal-unread]

Gone Girl – 5/5 ⭐

Boy meets girl. Girl disappears, assumed to have been murdered. Boy is the prime suspect, except: He didn’t do it. But someone clearly wants it to look like he did. So, where is his girl?

1/15/25

(Progress: 30%)

I fucking hate Nick Dunne. No buts. 

That man should kill himself never be any role model for anyone. 

I know this happens. I know people cheat. But, sue me, I don't care why he cheated, I don't care if he thought he was alone. Before this, I didn’t like him. But it was more about not caring about him, seeing his earlier depiction of his personality contrast so harshly with what a cheating asshat he seems to be. 

to quote a row of texts I sent to my friend earlier today when the memory of the new information in the book still stung and made my prefrontal cortex shrivel to half its size:

12:47 i wanna kill the protagonist of the book i’m reading

12:47 for real

12:47 i hate him

12:47 #NickDunneOnTheCross2025

Excuse my violent religious imagery, I really don't know why this passage about him cheating hit me so much. Even though I could puke and keel over at the thought of Nick cheating on Amy with a much younger woman (I don't know where all these detailed images come from), I have no idea why this plot point bothered me so insanely. You have no idea. Maybe it’s just been a long time since a book has managed to give me the emotional equivalent of a stabbing with a dull knife but still right in the heart, just weirdly twisting the thing inside my guts to do as much damage with it (imagery!! oh my god!!) but this? Am I afraid to end up like Amy or like the mistress? Both only loved to a limited capacity? By the same man who could not give less of a fuck about a woman if she isn’t his super cool dudette Bitchass Twin Sister? Am I mad? Can you really tell? Update later. Can’t right now. Need to figure out why men say they like feminine women but whine when they order an espresso martini and dont shotgun five bud lights stacked on top of each other. But if you have parents who name you Nick and Go, which sounds like a damn pickpocketing technique now that I think about it, I too would get my attention elsewhere or maybe open a bar with a name about as creative as the band “The The”. 

1/16/25

(Progress: 32%)

Never mind. I don't actually hate his sister because she called him out on his BS at the end of the chapter. She’s so real for that.

1/17/25

(Progress: 100%)

Okay. Fucking hell. What? 

Looking back on my remarks at about 30% I almost feel silly. I‘m assuming that this trajectory of emotions — confusion, anger, more anger, realization, anger-infused confusion — was exactly what Flynn wanted, and it almost feels disappointing that I fell right into the trap and followed that exact path. But: That also means I experienced this book how it was meant to be experienced! Even though by the end I wasn’t sure why all I’d ever hear about it had to do with the “Cool Girl Monologue”. I mean, her multiple page-ramble about chili-dog-overenthusiastic women was fun to read, but by far not the most important or most impressive of it all. (I did post an underlined passage of this part on my instagram story, the same way you’d tell people your favourite song from The Bends is Just, not because it actually is — it’s actually a close call between Planet Telex and Black Star — but because it’s more likely they know it and all you care about is conveying “Hey, I like this!” by letting them know you like listening to Thom Yorke whine while lying on the floor. No individual song, or, in this case, book passage differentiation needed. The difference isn’t as gaping as it is between people whose favourite Metallica song is The Call of Ktulu and Nothing Else Matters. End of rant. Closing the parentheses now.) 

Fun fact: The last half of this book had me in an insane chokehold. I came back home from the dentist, half of my mouth anesthetized and everything, an accidental devious smirk gracing my lips every time I try to smile, and I sat down in an armchair, started reading, and the next time I got up I had both finished the book and inadvertently waited out the anesthesia. Life hack time: if your mouth is numb but you're hungry and seriously debate eating a roll despite probably biting raw the entire inside of your cheek while doing it, just inhale 300 pages of an amazingly insane character and her asshat victim hubby. 

In the span of a month, Nick Dunne goes from “Where’s my pretty princess of a wife? Anyone seen her? Hey, this ottoman’s kinda heavy.” to “iwannakillmywifereallyreallyreallybadplzzz.”.

In the past month, I did interesting things such as:

A) Sleep.

B) Read.

C) Eat.

D) Go to class.

E) Run away and frame my husband as a murderer only to realize that, from my perspective, our fucked minds fit together like an insanely difficult jigsaw puzzle and I kill my ex instead and pretend he held me hostage and tortured me which he saw as an unconventional display of affection through his beast eyes.

The answer is: All of them except for E. (And A maybe, but it can all be accredited to this book.) Crazy, right? Okay, I’m gonna get my thoughts in order now.

The first hundred or so pages were good, but you could really feel that they were leading up to something truly fucked. And I had my suspicions about how fucked this was going to get, but I wasn’t even close. The constant switch between him detailing gruesome discoveries about her disappearance that somehow all led to him and her drawing this picture of fate bringing them together, everything being a perfect,  beautiful New York life really did it for me. Especially as her diary entries begin to bring along this acid aftertaste over time. There was a point at which I asked myself if he really didn't do it. Because how couldn’t he? She was Amazing Amy after all! 

The first point at which I raised my eyebrows concerningly high was when it was revealed that, yes, she did in fact come to the abandoned mall. But it wasn’t by force, it was to buy a gun. A damn gun of all things! The reaction of the guy who recognized her basically foreshadowed her “actual” personality. I could feel the weight of that “Oh shit, her?” through the pages when they showed him the picture. Other than that, nothing to report. Until we reach the 200-page mark, obviously. 

Andie. The perfect girl to blame everything on. The whole thing. The entire affair. All her doing as a twenty-something year old seductress. He just couldn’t resist. God, I want to shake her. On one hand, she’s a grown adult. She knew he was married, she knew his sister was literally down the hall when she tried to have sex with him because the disappearance of his wife doesn’t have anything to do with her because to Andie, Amy was always a distant character. Present enough to have questions asked about her but apparently not present enough to be seen as an actual obstacle when her husband was right there, being the poor, mistreated man he was, serving her drinks in the bar Amy’s parents’ exploitative business paid for. Andie is the manifestation of someone that the stereotypical wife-character would cry herself to sleep over. She’s younger, more attractive, probably even bakes for Nick. She craves attention in a way she could only ever really get in a real, official relationship with an available man, and still, she’s dumbing herself down to this. This belief only deepens when you think about how she’s sacrificing another woman’s happiness for her obsessive fling rooted in the small flicker of hope that he might one day leave his wife. Who would in turn take the bar, so that’s not happening, I guess. 

And yet, even after all that, if you told me you genuinely despised Andie, I’d think you haven’t actually read the book. It takes two to tango, in this case it’s a married man with a house and the wish to be a father someday and a college student who has nothing to lose in the love department. The playing field wasn’t exactly even. Like putting a cool sticker onto a surface it just won’t stick to. If you hadn’t tried putting it there, it would still be sticky enough to put somewhere else. But now that the protective paper’s off, you’re mad because you just wasted a sick sticker and also glad you did try to put it where it doesn’t belong so you now have certainty over the surface and won’t try again. Except that Andie’s palms are already rubbed raw from trying to make the sticker stay in place. Okay. Andie is not seulement to blame, we got it, no more stickers now. 

I’ll admit it now: I did not care for her time in that Hide-A-Way Cabin. I understand its importance in relation to her development and the need for her to be there, without money, because it’s an essential part of the plot, but I just couldn’t find it in me to really give a shit. Sorry, Jeff and Greta. Continuing. 

The Desi twist was something I really didn’t expect. I guess it wasn’t that far of a stretch for her to go from manipulating people and making them out to have done horrible things to her to actually killing someone. Still, didn’t think she had it in her, was all I thought while following the events of the last hundred pages.  Amazing Amy wins once again, they all shouted from the rooftops in unison, unaware of the silenced husband reduced to an obedient dog in the corner of their home soon to be filled with baby cries while his possible writer epitome Psycho Bitch rots in a recycle bin on his laptop.