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paulyenvol6 · 3 days ago

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Bruised, Not Broken

Based on this lovely request! Thank you so much for the idea and I hope you like it :)

Daemon and you have an ugly fight which leads to him leaving the red keep and you having a panic attack.

Contains: angst, anxiety, mentions of a miscarriage, very slight smut, mentions of physical pain, hotd typical themes like death and fighting, comfort

Wordcount: ~4.43k

Masterlist

The sun was about to touch the horizon when you looked out of the window and it looked so pretty that for a moment you forgot about your upset state of mind.

"Darling, can we please talk about this another time?" Daemon's voice brought you back to the moment and you rapidly turned your head to your husband remembering what he had just said.

"No, we can't. I can't believe you didn't even talk to me before agreeing."

Daemon shook his head like he was speaking to a child that couldn't comprehend the easiest connections and you felt the blood rushing in your ears.

"I'm pregnant, Daemon. I want you by my side when I deliver our child and I most certainly don't want our child to grow up without its father."

You walked towards him putting every emotion you felt in your eyes but his nostrils flared dangerously.

"So you think I would get killed off just like that by some idiot follower of the crabfeeder? My wife thinks I can't fight properly?"

You exhaled deeply and grabbed his upper arm.

"Of course I do. But don't you get the point? It is dangerous and you can't deny that. And as I said, what if you're not with me when I give birth?"

Daemon briefly looked down to the well-visible swell of your belly but then glared at you again.

"I will be back in time," was all he pressed but now your eyes filled with tears.

"You don't know that," you whispered your hands gripping the fabric of his tunic.

"I do, y/n, seven hells. The maesters say you're gonna deliver in two moons. That's plenty of time for me to put this crabfeeder in his place."

"But what if not? And what if the child comes too early?"

You searched for his eyes but this time Daemon avoided your gaze and instead looked to the side.

"This is our first child together, Daemon and I – I'm scared. You know that. I want you with me when it happens."

Now it was him who exhaled loudly and his lips curled in anger. "I will be with you. I promise you that."

"You can't promise me that."

Daemon scoffed and turned away from you all of the sudden.

"Then tell me what kind of marriage this is if my wife does not trust me? Mhm? If my wife thinks that I won't make it at the stepstones and thinks I'm too weak. And if my wife tells me what to do."

He pointed at you with small eyes but you wouldn't let him intimidate you. You pressed your lips together and made a step towards him.

"I fucking wish I could tell you what to do, Daemon Targaryen."

He threw his head back laughing loudly and aimlessly walked around the room.

"You do it all the time, y/n. You do it from the moment I wake up. The last thing I hear before falling asleep is you telling me what clothes to wear in the morning."

Your heartbeat fastened and you clenched your fists trying to fight the urge to scratch or squeeze something.

"How dare you. I want the best for this family and all I do is try to make sure that you're fine and that my child has a good life."

"Oh wait. So you're telling me what to wear because… You want the best for our child?"

You grinded your teeth. "This happened once," you hissed quietly but loud enough so you were sure he would hear you. "And it was because your brother wanted you to behave and present yourself nicely because he had guests."

"Yes. Exactly. So it is not enough to control my life but you're also conspiring with my brother because wild and messy Daemon needs to be controlled and can't be left alone because he might do something stupid. I'm not a fucking child and I don't need your or my brother to act like you're my parents."

You panted heavily and placed your head on your forehead.

"You really don't get it, do you?"

He closed his eyes and laughed uncontrolled. "Do you know that you always do this? You throw all these things at my head and when I don't agree with you you tell me that I'm just too stupid to understand you."

"That's enough, Daemon," you shouted and pushed yourself away from the table you had leaned against. "You don't listen to me, that's why. As soon as I critises something about you you always get into this defensive attitude instead of just listening. I'm not saying these things because I want to upset you."

"Mhm yes, you're just so caring and kind and it's me who brings in all the trouble. Why did you marry me then, huh? Have you only just now noticed that I'm not gonna spend my life chained to our chambers in king's landing while my men are fighting for our comfortable lives at the stepstones? Did you think I'd change my entire personality once we're married and I fucked your cunt once?"

"Shut up, Daemon. I mean it," you hissed close to tears.

"It's good, yes. Fucking you, I mean. But it's not that good."

"OUT. GET OUT RIGHT NOW!" you screamed and pushed against his chest.

For a brief moment he stood still ignoring your attempts of pushing him away and not moving an inch but soon he flared his nostrils one last time and then turned around to leave your chambers.

~~~~~~~~~~

Daemon stomped rather than walked through the streets of king's landing and he was almost certain that there was actual smoke leaking out of his nose. His whole body was on fire and he knew that only two things could calm him now.

The first one was very difficult to do because he didn't know where to find a person that would willingly let him beat him up so Daemon now headed to his favourite brothel that was located on the street of silk. He rarely went there anymore now that he was married and had found a partner that enjoyed sex just as much as he did but tonight he found that he didn't have a choice but to return to this place that had once been his favourite place to be. You wouldn't open your legs for him tonight so someone else had to. There was no way Daemon would be able to sleep or eat or do anything in this state of mind so he had to calm himself.

He saw the familiar wooden sign from the far and contently sighed. There was this signiture smell of this part of the city and when he had been a young boy and Viserys had taken him to a brothel for the first time he had found it to be disgusting and obscene. Today he was in some way used to it. Oddly enough it smelled like a woman's cunt and as filthy as it felt, the scent now excited him.

Daemon entered the brothel and immediately noticed all the women lolling lasciviously on the couches. In the dim light the owner of the brothel, a short man that everyone only called One-Eyes Rog because he had lost his left eye in a fight in an inn a few years ago, didn't notice him at first but when his eyes fell on his silver hair he immediately bowed his head.

"My prince. What an honour it is to welcome you here."

It was obvious that One-Eyed Rog had suspected to have lost his loyal guest to you after his marriage which was why he was so surprised by his unexpected visit.

"What can I do for you, my prince? I just got a handful of new girls from the north. One of them, Ysa is her name, is the loveliest redhead you'll ever see. So young and soft, you'll feel like you're touching a maiden."

He laughed loudly which sounded more like a horse snorting and held his stomach as if he couldn't keep himself up. Perhaps he actually couldn't. Daemon didn't feel like spending so much time in One-Eyed Rog's presence so he rolled his eyes while walking past the man.

"Bring her up to my room. I expect I still have my own room," he whispered quietly and it sounded a lot more threatening that he had intended to.

"Of course, of course, my prince," the owner of the brothel assured him while bowing again. "Please, let me know if there is anything you require. Anything you want, we will bring it to you."

Daemon almost didn't hear his words because he was already making his way up the stairs.

~~~~~~~~~~

You panted heavily and placed your hand on your chest.

You just couldn't help it, his words had hurt you like little knives that he had driven right into your heart. And now you couldn't reach inside to pull them out so all you could do was wait and stare at the door.

You didn't even know whether you wanted Daemon to return. After all it had been you who threw him out but still you wanted him to tell you how sorry he was and that everything had been a big mistake.

'Fuck,' you thought and squeezed your eyes. Everything spinned around you and you quickly gripped the table to your right so you wouldn't fall to the ground. What if you would never reconcile? What if Daemon just left to fight at the stepstones and wouldn't come back? What if you would never see him again? What if your child would grow up without its father and what if you would have to raise it on your own?

The sob came unexpected but since you were alone in your room you didn't fight the waves of tears washing over you. You allowed yourself around ten minutes of self-pity during which you imagined the worst things that could happen but after there were no tears left to cry you raised your head again and inhaled a few times.

Your surrounding were still spinning so you blinked a few times until you felt brave enough to take a step forward. The stumbling that followed wasn't caused by your dizziness but rather by how powerless you felt and suddenly you remembered that it had been hours since you had eaten something. And that was although your doctors had told you to eat enough.

Fresh tears formed in your eyes because how was it that you didn't manage to care for your babe before it was even born? You sat down on a chair and stared at the bowl of fruit in front of you. You had to eat something, that much was clear but you didn't crave anything. For some reason the sight of the apple made your stomach turn and you were aware that you would have to force yourself.

Your trembling hand reached out for the bowl thinking that a peach was the least unbearable food to eat right now so you grabbed it and examined it closely. Despite feeling the rejection from your belly you moved it to your lips and took a careful bite.

It wasn't like it tasted bad. It was a peach after all. And still you almost wanted to throw up and immediately put the fruit down. Your face was drawn with disgust and despite everything the maesters had told you, you would have to ignore their advice tonight. You just couldn't eat anything.

Feeling very helpless and pathetic suddenly you placed your arms on the table and rested your head on top of them. You didn't know how long you were laying there like this. Strangely, you suddenly felt numb and so tired that you couldn't even feel anger towards Daemon, so you just waited and wished you could go to sleep and wake up to find everything as it was before your ugly fight.

But of course none of the gods granted you this wish and instead you were soon disrupted by an awful pain in your core. It started as a light pull but soon you had to straighten up because you thought the position might be the problem. But it only became worse and you anxiously touched your belly.

'What is going on?' you thought and gasped for air when a sharp and intense ache spread throughout your body. It was way too early for you to give birth, that was clear, but what was this? You were more than familiar with the usual and normal difficulties during pregnancy, like morning sickness or your aching back but you had never felt something like this.

'Daemon,' was the first thing that shot into your head but in the very same second you remembered what had happened between the two of you and you wished you could slap yourself. Or Daemon.

Gods, why did this happen right now? You needed him now and you had no idea where he was. You tried to stand up because either way, you needed a maester to look after you and the babe but your knees were so wobbly that you instantly fell down on the chair again which caused another wave of pain. Shouting, it was then.

"Ser Tomas," you said loudly on the verge of crying and after repeating your words two more times the door sprang open and the knight rushed into the room.

"Princess. What is it?"

You held your heart trying to fight the panic that was slowly but surely creeping up on you.

"I-I… Something's wrong. Please get the maester," you whined and you felt your toes curl at the pain. What was happening? This couldn't be true, no. You didn't even want to form the thought in your head but what if – What if you were losing the child.

Suddenly, and you didn't even know when it had started, tears were rolling down your face and combined with your dizziness you feared that you might faint. Ser Tomas had answered you but you hadn't been able to understand him so all you could do was wait while the knight left the room as quickly as he had entered it and you just hoped that he went to get someone.

Daemon. You needed him so badly. You needed him to hold your hand and stroke your hair and tell you that everything would be fine. You needed him to rub over your belly and hear his voice close to your ear. Your eyes sprang open at another sting and you watched your stomach as if you could see if something was wrong that way.

And then, you didn't know how much time had passed the door opened again and Maester Fynnes rushed in as swiftly as his old body allowed him to.

"Princess," he shouted and although he was not the person you wished to see it gave you comfort to have somebody at your side.

"I-I don't know what's wrong," you managed to press. "It hurts, it hurts so bad. W-What i-if I… I don't wanna lose it."

Once again the veil of tears didn't allow you to make out your surroundings but this was your smallest problem right now.

"Breathe, princess. Breathe. That's the most important thing."

You tried to follow his advice and inhaled deeply but it didn't help you at all. It rather increased your panic because you feared you would suffocate as the lack of air entering your body made your head turn.

"I-I don't know what to do," you sobbed hands gripping the chair you were sitting on. The maester had sat down next to you and watched you concerned.

"It's too early for the child to arrive."

"I'm losing it," you cried panting hectically. "I-I think I'm losing the child."

"No, my princess. You need to calm down, it might just be – "

"NO," you interrupted him and threw your head back. "Fuckkkk…. I need Daemon. Please. Get him here. Now."

Maester Fynnes almost jumped to his feet and ran to the door. The next few minutes passed without you comprehending what was happening around you but you were too focused on the pain and trying to breathe to listen to the maester. Only when he was next to you again did you hear him.

"They will search for Daemon. I'm sure he will be back soon."

"Where is he?" you whispered and grabbed the maester's hand. "Where is he, why is he not here with me?"

Fynnes actually looked pitiful when your eyes had found his and soothingly ran his thumb over the back of your hand.

"I don't know, princess. But they will find him."

"I need him now. I need him, fuck… He's the only one – Please, find him. What if he has left? Is Caraxes still here, has he left on his back – "

"Shhh," Fynnes made. "This is not helping. It would be better for you to try and relax."

But how were you supposed to do that? Your thoughts were spinning, your heart was beating so fast that it was almost uncomfortable and your whole body was aching.

"I will bring you milk of the poppy, princess. It might help you sleep."

It took you a moment to comprehend his words but once you did you were shaking your head rapidly.

"No, no, no. I need to help the child. I can't sleep, I have to save it."

Maester Fynnes rose to his feet while patting your shoulder.

"The child will be fine. There is nothing you have to do beside calming yourself."

When the maester returned with a cup your head was still shaking. It was still shaking when he offered you the cup. But then at some point you were simply too tired to refuse and you were actually quite thirsty.

So even before your lips touched the cup your brain already felt cloudy and the liquid evenutally did the rest.

~~~~~~~~~~

Daemon licked over his lip and tasted sweat. He had his eyes closed and his head thrown back in pleasure but somehow he still wasn't in the present moment. His thoughts wandered to you over and over again no matter how deep he fucked Ysa or how tight she clenched around him.

"Oh fuck," she moaned and Daemon registered how her hands gripped the bed sheets but his body felt disconnected to his mind. He felt the pleasure he was receiving but it didn't reach his brain.

And yet he went on to chase his release, gripped her hips and reached around her body to cup her breasts but just as felt himself getting closer to the edge the door opened and Daemon exhaled in dissatisfaction.

He stopped fucking Ysa but stayed inside of her while turning his head to see who had disrupted them. Noticing that it was a knight from the red keep, he frowned.

"My prince. There is an urgent matter. You have to come back to the red keep, your wife has requested your presence!"

At first Daemon hesitated but he knew you so well. And he knew how proud you were. Never would you swallow your pride and ask for him if it wasn't a serious matter. That was why Daemon quickly pulled out of Ysa without looking at her for another second.

"What happened? Is she alright?" he asked while putting on his clothes. He didn't care whether the man would be able to recognise the concern in his voice; it was about getting a grip of the situation now as fast as possible.

"I don't know, my prince. I was just sent to search for you and I was told to be quick."

Daemon nodded and closed the buttons of his shirt with his slightly shaking fingers. "Let's go then."

The prince rushed through the streets next to the knight whose name he didn't know and the longer they went the more scared Daemon became. He wasn't the kind of person that was scared a lot, because what did he, the rogue prince have to be scared of?

But he knew that this was a different situation. You would never ask for him to come to you during a fight if it wasn't important. He remembered all too well how you didn't speak to him for 4 days last year after Daemon had called your traditional wedding gown "prim". You were stubborn. And you wouldn't send knights searching for him just to yell at him again.

That was why when the two men finally arrived at the keep Daemon felt a bitter feeling in his stomach. He really needed to check on you now and make sure that you were alright because despite all the fighting and disagreements he loved you deeply and would never leave your side.

"Where is she? Is she in my rooms?"

The knight nodded and Daemon noticed how he looked anxious as well which didn't exactly calm him either.

"I-I think so. They told me to bring you to your chambers."

"I will find the way."

With these words the prince started to walk through the corridor and once he was around the corner he started to run. Although he wasn't a particulary religious person suddenly he caught himself praying that you were fine. And then he finally arrived, energetically opened the door to your rooms and his eyes sprang open.

A man with a black scarf over his head stood by your bed, and Daemon could see the tip of a dagger glinting in the moonlight. His brain quickly processed and then he hasted towards him exactly in the same moment as the assassin started to approach your sleeping figure.

That was the moment the man noticed Daemon and shifted his attention to the prince as well.

"Little bastard," Daemon hissed while the man made his way to him and quickly pulled out his sword. By now you had woken up from the noise and shrieked when your mind comprehended what was happening.

"Daemon," you gasped and watched with big eyes how your husband swang his sword at the assassin.

It would be an exaggeration to say that it was a long fight. He was Daemon Targaryen after all and within seconds he had managed to disarm the man and then drew his sword through his throat. Blood sprayed everywhere, the man sank to the floor and then everything was quiet so all Daemon heard was your sobbing.

You had buried your face in your hands and uncontrollably cried and of course your husband had to do something about it now. He swiftly cleaned his sword with the assassin's cloak, dropped the weapon and then made his way towards you.

"Come here, darling," he whispered and lifted you up by your arms to pull you against his chest. "It's alright, I'm here. I'm here, love and you're safe."

His left hand held your back while his right stroked your hair and it felt so surreal and good at the same time that you simply couldn't stop crying.

"D-Daemon," you sobbed and buried your hands in his muscular arms.

"Yes, I know. Everything will be alright now."

"I-I… I," you muttered and looked up to him with teary and round eyes.

"What is it, babygirl? What happened?"

You crouched against his strong body hoping that everything would be easier if only you were as close as physically possible and in this moment you were so grateful for the way his arms wrapped around your back. He just knew you and what you needed right now.

It took you a few more minutes until you felt calm enough to explain to him what happened but even then your voice was trembling.

"It was so… It was terrible, I… A-After you left… I j-just sat there," you started and your husband nodded encouragingly.

"A-And then after s-some time…. I felt a p-pain in my stomach. I-I was so scared, Daemon…"

New tears welled in your eyes and your whole body was shaking while you buried your face in his neck that smelled so much like Daemon. His soft voice cut through the air while his hand repeatedly ran over the back of your head.

"What happened then, love?"

"I panicked. And I-I thought t-that I… That I'm g-gonna lose our child. S-So the maester came and I don't know… I don't remember everything. B-But I asked f-for you b-because I w-was so scared and then… Fynnes g-gave me milk of the p-poppy a-and I slept. Until now."

You finally looked at him again and his eyes looked so soft that you wondered how this was the same person you had fought with a few hours ago.

"Oh darling," he said quietly and pressed a kiss on your forehead. "I'm so sorry I wasn't there. How are you now? Are you still in pain?"

Slowly you shook your head because to your relief the ache had actually vanished.

"No, it's better."

"That's so good to hear, my love."

You quietly let him hold you for a while until you couldn't wait anymore; you just had to share your biggest fear.

"B-But what if I actually l-lost it, Daemon? What if I had a miscarriage in my sleep?"

Your voice sounded so thin and weak that in any other case you would've felt embarrassed but right now you just couldn't think of anything but the babe in your womb.

"No, honey. Do you see any blood on the bed? You would've bled if you'd lost it." He placed a hand on your swollen belly. "Let's see. Perhaps we will hear it."

He rubbed over your skin a few times while kissing your shoulder. For a few minutes you only paid attention to Daemon's steady breathing and the warmth of his hand on your body until you felt something inside of you. It was a kick and you instantly teared up again.

"I-I felt it," you gasped and heard him chuckle softly.

"There you have it. It's alive and it's healthy, sweetling."

You slowly nodded and then lowered your tired head until you leaned against his shoulder.

"That's right, y/n. You can sleep. We will figure out everything tomorrow."

You were too tired to even think about his words. All you knew was that everything would be fine.

It didn't matter how much the two of you fought or if you had different opinions on some matters.

You loved it each other and this love would overshadow anything stepping in your way.

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sambuckylibrary · 3 days ago

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SamBucky Valentine's Day Week 2025

The @sambuckylibrary will be holding a Valentine's Day week-long event! While the event will start on February 10th and the prompts will end on the 16th, the event will continue to accept entries until February 28th. During that time, we will be reblogging and sharing the work you guys create here on our blog.

You can post fanfiction, art, fic rec lists, comments, moodboards, podfics, edits, etc. It’ll be a low-stakes event. No need to sign up. Just remember to tag @sambuckylibrary in your post for each fill, and we will be tracking #sbvalentine2025 for reblogs.

If you are posting on AO3, please add it to the SamBucky Valentine's Day Week 2025 Collection.

There are also badges for each fill. For those badges, as well as the FAQ and rules, check the information under “keep reading”.

FAQ

What is this?

It’s a SamBucky week-long event.

Is there any pressure?

No pressure at all. Fill one prompt. Fill all thirteen prompts at once. Do however many you please.

Can I fill more than one prompt with one piece of art/one fic?

Yes! You can fill one prompt with one piece of art or fic. You can try to fill all thirteen prompts during the week at once with one piece of art or fic. You can do any number in between.

Are there any prizes for making anything for this event?

Just the satisfaction that you made something cool.

Is it just SamBucky?

Yes please, just SamBucky. There can be side ships, but the main ship should be SamBucky.

How long will this event run?

It will run from February 10th and run until February 28th.

I heard there are badges I can use for each fill?

There are! The badges will also appear each day of the first week of the event, but here they are just in case:

RULES AND GUIDELINES

What are the guidelines for the bingo?

I will be borrowing some of this from the MYSU Valentine’s Day Bingo 2022 Guidelines, since they were fantastic.

For Everyone:

1. Remember to @sambuckylibrary in the post as well as #sbvalentines2025.

2. Please also tag the prompt you’re filling (for instance, if the square is “Redwing”, use “#redwing” as one of your tags when posting about it on Tumblr).

3. If you’re uploading to AO3, please:

a ) Say somewhere which prompt you’re filling.

b ) Add it to The SamBucky Valentine's Day Week 2025 Collection (SamBucky_Valentines_Day_Week_2025).

For Artists:

1. Create at least one piece of new art that can’t have been posted anywhere else before this.

2. All visual art forms are welcome:

a ) Gifsets, at least 2 gifs.

b ) Aesthetic boards or moodboards, at least 4 images each.

c ) Drawing/painting, that is not a sketch.

d) Fan video.

e) Graphics edit.

For Authors:

1. At least 500 words.

2. Posted on Tumblr or AO3.

3. Can be part of a series, but should work as a standalone.

For Podficcers:

1. The podfic should at least be 5 minutes long.

2. It should be posted on either Tumblr or AO3.

3. The podfic can be of a fic made for the event, a fic not made for the event while still adhering to the prompt, or a notfic.

For Fic Rec Lists:

1. You must have at least three fics or podfics on the rec list.

2. Make sure to give brief descriptions of the fics or podfics as well as their rating and wordcount.

For Commenters:

1. Any amount of comment counts, from a heart emoji (“❤️”) to an essay.

2. We would rather this be about what makes you happy and joyful about reading than any scathing critiques.

Things to be mindful of when creating:

For Sam

Avoid framing Sam only as a caretaker or emotional support for Bucky. Be mindful of Sam acting angry or aggressive in an out-of-character way and falling into the angry/sassy Black man trope (check out the MCU source material to help with character traits).

Avoid decentering Sam as a main character and refrain from focusing entirely on Bucky.

In art: avoid whitewashing Sam’s skin and research drawing Black characters.

General disclaimer: Race affects every aspect of his life, including interacting with police/government and the white structures of the world when it comes to performing his duties as Cap and simply being a Black man that lives in the U.S.

For Bucky

Avoid phrasing “flesh/normal/human hand” to refer to the contrast between his prosthetic arm and his right arm. The phrasing is ableist. You can simply refer to his prosthesis when relevant, otherwise use “right/left arm/hand”.

For more information, please check out this document suggested by @ninesdb on how to write Bucky as an amputee. @ninesdb is also open to questions if you have any queries not answered by the google doc.

Specific Tags:

Avoid tags in AO3 like “Sam Wilson is a Gift”, “Sam Wilson is a Saint”, and “Bucky Needs a Hug”.

Have fun and we look forward to your Valentine's Day fics!

- The Mods

#sbvalentine2025 #sambucky #sam wilson #bucky barnes #sambucky events #sambucky valentine's day event #valentine's day #sambucky fan art #sambucky podfic #sambucky edits #sambucky fic recs #sambucky fanfiction #sambucky moodboard #sambucky art #mod: thatmexisaurusrex

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bellixpog · 18 hours ago

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Ultraviolence- Kang Noeul

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pair: Kang No-eul × F!Reader

context: part.2 of my other imagine

warning: hair pulling, bad word (just one sentence), possessive and obsessive jealousy

words: 4,5k

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Two weeks passed. No-eul watched you walk past the store every morning, heading to the café in front of the clothing store, with only a road separating the stores. No-eul noticed that you worked there, simply because you came in at the same time as her, and left work half an hour after her. As soon as she noticed this, she started to leave work in a hurry and go to your cafe, sitting at the tables in the back, watching you work, every move you made. Everything watched by her. She also noticed that you hated your boss, because every time she spoke to you, you would give a fake smile and turn away, rolling your eyes. She loved watching you. It was, however, one afternoon that you finally noticed the woman.

You recognized the face, but you couldn't remember where it came from. Ignoring that, you walked over to the girl, smiling slightly. "Hi... Would you like to order something?" You asked, with your notepad and pen in hand. No-eul smiled slightly and replied, "A chocolate donut and a black coffee, please." You nodded, writing down the order. Before leaving, you looked at the girl and analyzed her, "You work at the store in front, don't you?" You ask, tilting your head slightly. No-eul's smile widens and she nods. "Yes, that's me." You bite your lip, smiling and letting out a nasal laugh. "What is your name?" "No-eul...And yours?" No-eul asks, leaning slightly over the table, curious "Min-young..." You answer and No-eul analyzes you "Nice name... It suits you" You blushed and smiled shyly "Your order will arrive soon"

You say, and head to the counter, still slightly red from the woman's compliment. She exuded a confidence you had never seen before, it was like nothing affected her. It both delighted and frightened you, in a way. You left it aside, starting to prepare the order for No-eul, and other pending customers. You just needed to finish those last few orders and your shift would be over, and you would finally go home to see your little dog, Molly. A sigh left your mouth when you realized your shift was over. You took off your apron and let down your hair, looking around the space, noticing that No-eul was still there, sitting on the same place. "We're closing... Do you need anything?" No-eul raised her head and smiled, standing up. “To take a girl home, if she accepts…” You raised your eyebrows in surprise, and lets out a nasal laugh, grabbing your coat. "I don't think she sees any problem with that..." You say, and No-eul smiles, walking towards the door. "Ladies first." She says, opening the door and making room for you to leave. You smile shyly, stepping out the door, waiting for No-eul.

We can say that these little "dates" were repeated for two months. No-eul was amazing to you: She wrote you letters by hand, your Fridays were spent at a restaurant you both liked, and your Saturday and Sunday mornings were lazy, with No-eul's wet kisses on her neck and shoulder. You noticed No-eul's jealousy. The shape bit the inside of her cheek whenever she saw you talking to someone she didn't know who it was - that is, everyone - This slight possessiveness was something you happily accepted, and sometimes ignored. The request for a date was not something surprising, after all, you were actually being treated as a married person. Over time, there were some things that bothered you a little.

No-eul started to get more jealous, checking her phone every day, even asked you to change jobs so she could "spend more time with you". She even tried to hire someone to walk your dog Molly so you wouldn't have to leave the house, but giving up your dog was not in the cards. Over time, things got...intense. One day, you were putting on your coat, getting ready to take Molly for a walk, when you felt No-eul grab your hair, pulling you back. You groaned in pain, and No-eul rested your head on her shoulder, and whispered in your ear "Where the fuck are you going, Min-young?" No-eul whispered in your ear, she seemed calm, but to you, who knew her quite well, you knew that there was anger in that whisper.You didn't have to say anything: Molly appeared, and barked, wagging her tail. No-eul understood and let go of her hair and took Molly's leash "I'll go with her, babe. You stay." No-eul said wearing her coat. It wasn't the first, nor the last time that his displays of love were a little... rough, so to speak. But every time she hit you, or pulled your hair, it was like a kiss. A real kiss of love. That's how you knew she loved you, in her own way.

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a/n: that one is so small, someone kill me, please

THAT'S IT BABIES, I'M ALREADY WRITING THE NEXT ONE

Hope you liked it, xoxo!

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

#guard 11 #kang noeul #squid game #possesive love #kang no eul #obsession #obsessive love #agressive #ultraviolence #sapphism #sapphic

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haguenauisforlovers · 22 hours ago

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♡ kiss and make up in haguenau ♡

HAGUENAU IS FOR LOVERS A Webgott Valentine’s Week Fan Event Feb. 12 - Feb 18, 2025

It's happening!! D-11 to Haguenau Is for Lovers: A Webgott Valentine's Week Fan Event. Become the fujo WW2 wife and pull up a cuck chair, write your sick fics and create beloved shit posts in celebration of two haters who are obsessed with each other: Joe Liebgott x David Webster. (Thank you so much for the support so far! Mwah!)

Need a refresher about the event? Click ‘Keep Reading’ for rules, FAQs, and The Good Stuff. Or head over to our Navigation post.

What is it?

A week-long Valentine’s Webgott fan event where you can create beautiful and sick things for every tiny interaction between the two in the land of lovers, depression facial hair, and night patrols: WWII Haguenau. ‘Haguenau is for Lovers 2025’ starts on a Webgott Wednesday and will run from Feb. 12 - Feb 18, 2025. This fan event would like to thank this post by @randlemartin for being iconic, and for literally providing the title of it all.

EVENT DATES TO REMEMBER

Prompts poll open: Dec. 18, 2024

Prompts poll close: December 26, 2024

Prompts reveal: Dec. 28, 2025

Fan event start: Feb 12, 2025

Fan event end: Feb 18, 2025

FIC SUBMISSION DATES TO REMEMBER

AO3 Collection open for Submissions: Feb 12, 2024

Fic collection reveal: Feb 14, 2024

Fic collection close: Feb. 18, 2024

*This page will begin reblogging posts with @haguenauisforlovers mentioned, and/or posts tagged with #haguenauisforlovers or #webgottvday on Feb. 12, 2025.

FAQs

Who can join and what can they contribute?

All those who are part of Webgott nation near and far. This event will be hosted primarily on Tumblr so to participate, you must have a Tumblr account. AO3 accounts are optional but highly encouraged, especially if participating authors prefer to lock their fics for AO3 users only. This fan event is open to: - Fics - AMVs and edits - Fan Art - Webweaves and Moodboards - GIFs - Playlists - Meme nonsense - Historical research, baby

RULES AND GUIDELINES

1. Main Relationship: Joe Liebgott/David Webster This is a Webgott event. That’s what it’s all about, baby. 2. Inclusion of other Ships: Ships apart from Webgott are welcome as background/implied (OC/Canon, Big Ships, Rare pairs). examples: Fic: Baberoe sharing an excruciatingly tender moment in the background while Joe and Web glare at each other in a gay way. Text post/GIF sets: Other ships sharing Tender/Cute moments in Haguenau vs. Joe and Web at each other’s neck at Haguenau 3. Tracking and Reblogging: This page will reblog posts with @haguenauisforlovers mentioned, and/or posts with tagged with #haguenauisforlovers or #webgottvday 4. AI-generated content is not allowed. Romance is created not generated. All Webgott works found here will be organic and free-range. RPF is honest work for real, beautiful, flesh-and-blood sickos. 5. [Fic Specific] Can we do AUs? AUs can be incorporated in, but fics should be set primarily in Haguenau. example: Post-war is allowed but they have to be reminiscing about Haguenau. Modern AU but they’re thrown into a time machine and land right smack behind enemy lines. You get what we mean. 6. Zero-tolerance Policy: Don’t be a dick actually. :) Please be civil and respectful toward one another. There is a zero tolerance policy for posts and/or comments that contain personal attacks or attempts at doxxing. Comments/posts promoting homophobia/racism/ableism or Nazi glorification will be removed. Similarly, there is also a zero tolerance policy for disrespecting characters, pairings, or kinks. This is a YKINMK (Your Kink Is Not My Kink) zone.

*Unironic Webster haters, please sit this one out. That's First and Second Platoon’s job. Cobb, Martin, and IRL Malarkey signed up twice.

Will there be prompts?

Yes! You can find the prompt list here.

What is a prompt?

A thought starter, brain lube if you will. Prompts are there to 1) spark any ideas for your works, whether they’re edits, gif sets, text posts, or fics; 2) keep you on theme. You don’t have to use them as is, but they’re there to help you jumpstart an idea. e.g. Prompt: Spit Fic: Web finally spits out what he’s been wanting to tell Joe since day GIF Set: Side by side: Web open mouthed, Lieb spit compilation

Do I have to use every prompt for each day?

No, you don’t! You can choose one (1) of the prompts, or incorporate all four prompts if you’re a beautiful overachiever like that.

Do I have to participate/create something for every day of the fan event?

Not at all! This is a: No Pressure Zone. Create and post for the event as much or as little as you want. On the same note, just engaging with the posts created by others or the page is already active participation with the fan event. Haguenau is for Lovers just wants a fun week where we all hyperfixate on Webgott in love together (more than usual). Don’t feel the need to put something out everyday single day.

Do I have to participate/create something for every day of the fan event?

Not at all! This is a: No Pressure Zone. Create and post for the event as much or as little as you want. On the same note, just engaging with the posts created by others or the page is already active participation with the fan event. 'Haguenau is for Lovers' just wants a fun week where we all hyperfixate on Webgott in love together (more than usual). Don’t feel the need to put something out everyday single day. <3

Why Haguenau?

Because it’s for LOVERS. Caress Band of Brothers episode 8 “The Last Patrol” in your hands and say a prayer to RPF. Anything can happen at the tailend of war, but especially falling in love. Get as snug as a bug, and let your Webgott imagination roam wild and free in war-torn Haguenau. But on a more serious note, Easy Company was stationed there during Valentine’s Day 1945. Historical accuracy, our collective beloved.

Any more questions?

The inbox is open! All questions will be answered as promptly as possible. If you’re submitting through anon, you can track your answered questions through the ASK TAG.

#egg on and fall in love with a coworker/a quasi nemesis #like follow reblog all appreciated ♡#we're sooooo close!!#signal boost helps us all ♡♡♡♡#band of brothers #webgott #joe liebgott #david webster

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ourwhisperingtorment · 1 month ago

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Playing Squid Game vs Playing Among Us

They’re 100% half brothers. No DNA test needed.

#this was the first thing i noticed when inho was revealed to be player 001 #also #remember how they played hide and seek throughout the entire first season? very brothers of them to do that.#i need their reunion please.#i’m not expecting a happy ending #i just need a conclusion.#doesn’t mean i wont cry if it isnt a happy ending tho #and yes they’re half brothers not step brothers #squid game #squid game 2 #squid game 2 spoilers #hwang inho #hwang in ho #hwang junho #hwang jun ho #hwang bros

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uselessgay10101 · 1 day ago

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Ohhhhh so THATS what they changedddd- (ugh it's bad but good...)

Yeah totally agree with you on the "THERE'S A FUCKING APOCALYPSE BRO I DON'T THINK ME KISSING A GIRL WILL MAKE THINGS WORSE-!"

But I understand how Alek probably wants to write Anna off as (Definitely needs more bc it's shit-)

The idea that "it's wrong" isn't really a religious thing as much as you would expect. I say this as someone who didn't really do the "go to church every sunday" or "pray every night" type of thing but I DID have the typical religious household in a Mexican family. I didn't get told "you'll go yo hell" or "God doesn't love you bc your a child of satan-"

No thankfully none of that. But did get indirect signals.

An eyeroll, a groan, a simple comment, or a disgusted expression is ENOUGH for not only internalized homophobia to be developed but fear of acceptance

Which is what I think Anna is going through. It is the stage of acceptance. In which one not only accepts one's self but the fact that there will be people against you for the sole fact of BEING gay. And that THAT won't stop you from being your gay self (is it badly written and makes me want to cry with how bad it is sometimes? Yes but that's another thing-)

Anna isn't in a religious household or constantly being told "being gay is a bad so....no [smack]"

...But she kinda is. Bc that's probably what's going through her head at the slightest interaction with Lane. I can FEEL her internal anxiety and rage at not only Lane but in herself because "friends don't....FEEL things for friends"

"Your mind is not only your permanent home but also your most present one." - Uselessgay 2025 :))

Also we all know Anna treasures Dimitri above almost everything right? She wants his approval and praise and it stems from her want and need for approval from her own FATHER

And from what I've read it's not likely Dimitri is too fond of the idea that his sister is 💅💅💅

From a nasty disgusted look to acting cold and uncaring to her when she need reassurance

That to someone who constantly seeks the approval from those she loves is soul crushing. it's not a simple pain in your chest but something that sticks to you like unactivated slime! It's something you keeps it's claws in a death grip when hugging you and that u remember unconsciously

Now pair that with one's unintentional internalized homophobia and it's enough to not only be cruel to yourself but to whoever one likes in a gay way

The kiss scene in my mind was perfect. (As perfect as bad writing can get but...it's not BAAAD! (She could use a little more experience in writing such scenes))

The kiss and the scene leading up to it wasn't soft nor loving. It's was angry and desperate.

You're allowed to disagree bc I know what I'm saying is infuriating to ppl who just want Anna to stop being so...[wild gestures]

But it's real. It's fucking infuriating that only wlw have to deal with this shit when the straights are off smooching and having sex in the first 💎 diamond 💎 scene

But It's really is only something that straight people could never understand. I know it's hard to live in a time where wlw players are more accepted than ever but still [gestures wildly again]

Anna's route.....isn't BAD nor is it GOOD but it is real in the sense that it give the real experience OF being gay in an otherwise unaccepting environment

Again it's stupid and heartbreaking that's its ONLY wlw but wlw is not straight and it never will be (please don't take that as an insult! I mean that in a "agree to disagree" way and a "appreciate being you" type-pa way)

--- And omg this is so long- sorry I just want everyone to know I'm not COMPLETELY crazy in justifying the route.. I see the good in the bad and willing to ask questions...I'm not being mean I swear- :')

I haven’t caught up to Anna’s route yet on my slot but lowkey what was that…

Apparently there’s variations depending on VoG or WoD/ compassion/no compassion etc and I’ve seen ss for one path only so far.

I just don’t get why Anna, who has so far been presented as being averse to looking at women romantically say something like this ? It feels ooc almost idk. You could argue that she’s opening up slowly, and is still in denial over her feelings and/or sexuality and this was a way to open that avenue but it doesn’t feel right to me idk why.

using the word ‘recoiled’ and then saying she wanted to ‘wash herself’ is genuinely crazy bye. look, I would also recoil if someone kissed me outta nowhere (doubly so if I was struggling with my sexuality) but ‘wash herself off’ IS SO INSANE???? as if it’s a dirty act. and before anyone says anything, I know there are people have repressed desires; they can’t come to terms with themselves being attracted to the same gender and they could potentially feel that way. but oh my god, there has been no nuance in the way this has been handled. no deep religious trauma that could’ve molded her this way, nothing that could even potentially explain why Anna would see same sex relationships and attraction the way she does. (someone correct me if I’m wrong pls it’s been ages since I played my Anna route)

Lada and Tata’s budding relationship has been handled so much better. There’s questions from both and you can see they’re both new to this; Lada even questions herself if ‘it’s okay’ to feel that way but it makes her feel happy so she does what her heart tells her to. What kinda reasoning is it that an apocalypse can happen but heaven forbid u wanna kiss a girl

There were so many ways to write a kiss scene between them. Idk if I’m overthinking or if anyone else felt the same way

ITS SO WEIRD. this woman hates lesbians and bisexual players bruh i cannot.

(also hearing that fucking Boris appears today in a vision made me crash the fuck out)

#heavens secret: requiem #rc hsr #rc anna #rc cain #romance club spoilers #romance club update #romance club #lgbtq #gay awakening

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hauntingofhouses · 1 year ago

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BRB thinking thoughts about Taigen's character, the TaiMizu ship, and a big chunk of fandom's perceptions regarding both those things.

(Inspired by @farintonorth's post related to this topic that just got my brain going brrrrr)

OK so let me just... start off by saying that I think that reducing stories to their tropes is seriously detrimental to the way some people are interacting with fiction, and while that honestly warrants its own post about the subject, I wanna talk specifically about how this affects the way some people in the fandom talk about Taigen and TaiMizu.

Because yeah, tropes are useful shorthand to refer to certain dynamics or archetypes etc, and they are indeed the building blocks to any story. But in a well-written story, characters and their relationships, actions, and motivations, are much more complex than just tropes. Because in a story that has characters who are more than just cardboard cutouts, their behaviours, backgrounds, motivations and all of that, are inseparable from the context of the overall story they exist in.

So like, sure, you can say Mizu and Taigen have an enemies-to-lovers or rivals-to-lovers dynamic. I also use those terms because it's easier. But I also think this is where things start to get a bit twisted, especially from an intertextual sense. Because "enemies-to-lovers" is also commonly used to refer to other ships in other media, whereby it tends to be rooted in an imbalanced power dynamic, such as oppressor-oppressed and bully-victim.

And while that's a whole can of worms that I won't be getting into because it can quickly derail into a whole separate sort of fandom discourse, I'd just like to make it clear that Mizu and Taigen, in particular, do not have an imbalanced power dynamic. They are not bully-victim or oppressor-oppressed. The only understandable reason why someone might actually think their relationship is imbalanced is if

A) they only watched the first episode, or

B) they cannot grasp the slightest bit of nuance in a character, or

C) they're being obtuse on purpose simply because the Mizu/Taigen relationship, or Taigen's character in general, just doesn't suit their tastes.

While yes, Taigen, along with his whole gang, had bullied Mizu when they were children, that dynamic does not exist between them whatsoever in adulthood. Whatever imbalanced bully-victim power dynamic that had once existed between them was decisively ripped apart the moment Mizu beat him in that duel in the dojo, and then completely obliterated by the end of the season.

Mizu is not a defenseless victim at Taigen's mercy. Mizu can beat Taigen's ass any time she wants (and she DOES, repeatedly in fact), and could even kill him if she felt like it. She taunts him openly and without fear ("I like your hair"; "I can beat you with any weapon you choose") and all he does is bark back, because that's pretty much all Taigen ever does. Time and time again, he yaps about how much he wants to kill her, but time and time again, his actions prove that all of it is just an empty threat. Because though his words say "I hate you", his actions demonstrate the complete opposite. He's shown how protective he is of Mizu, how unhesitatingly he sacrifices himself up for her, how loyal he is in enduring days-long torture to not give up information about her, how even when near-death and in pain, he's still willing to keep standing back up so he can fight by her side and help her win against her enemies.

And Mizu is not an idiot! She sees that too. She does not see him as a threat, an enemy, or even a bully. Especially not by the end of Episode 3, and definitely not by the end of the season. When she finds him in the dungeon in Episode 6, she smiles from relief, and doesn't think twice to take him with her. Mizu finds him, at best, an annoyance, or at worst, an infuriating hindrance on her quest for vengeance. Which is why, when Taigen is about to say, "It's a shame our duel's set for tomorrow; I have to kill you before you get your revenge," Mizu whacks him on the head without a second thought before he can even finish his sentence, and leaves him lying unconscious, face-down, in the snow.

And this further emphasises how he does not hold any power over her. There is no abusive power dynamic between them. She is more powerful than him, he knows this, and all he's ever done after they've met up again in adulthood is get his ass whooped by her, get mad about it and pester her and follow her around, get his ass whooped by her some more, and put his life on the line to protect her.

"OOoooOOoooH b-but he called her a demon at the end of Episode 7 and threatened to kill her again!!!" Oh my god. He called her that because he's calling her out on her selfishness to stay silent about her knowledge of Fowler's plans to attack Edo. Because to him, loyalty and honour as a samurai is more important than anything. So in his own brash-and-immature Taigen way, he felt betrayed that Mizu did not hold the same principles. That's why he got angry. He wasn't even that mad about letting Akemi get dragged off by the Tokunobu guards. It was about saving the Shogun and the Shogunate as a whole. That's why the first thing he does in Edo is not find Akemi, but try to warn the Shogun about Fowler's attack.

Look, I'm not defending his stupid ass, of course. Because calling her a demon especially after their cute little wrestling time was obviously rude and inappropriate, especially since words like "demon", "monster" and "Onryo" have had such a deep effect on Mizu throughout her life, and continue to contribute to her self-hatred. But like? That's the fun of realistic and flawed characters, and realistic and flawed relationships. They're not perfect, and it's why we as an audience root for them, wanting to see them work through their shit and find a way to prevail despite it all.

Also, him saying that was in the heat of the moment. He was angry, he felt like his initial belief of who Mizu was—a strong and loyal samurai, just like him—was shattered, and so he lashed out. Was it rude? Definitely. Was it immature of him? Yes, incredibly. But it's also very much in line with his character, because even though he's grown a lot over the course of the season, the show isn't over yet, so obviously his character arc is just beginning, as that is also the case for the other three main characters: Mizu is beginning to accept herself, Akemi is beginning to grow into her position of power, Ringo beginning to train under Master Eiji, while Taigen is beginning to simply be a better person.

On that note, when speaking of Taigen's immaturity, I think that's also one of the main things that people tend to gloss over when it comes to his character. Because when you boil everything down to its bare essentials, Taigen is, essentially, a boy. I've talked about this before, but to reiterate, Taigen very much behaves like an unhealed child. Even as an adult, he is insecure, prone to throwing tantrums, and is desperate to latch onto some material goal in hopes that it will make him feel better—initially he was chasing status/glory/greatness, and then when Mizu tells him that "Nothing comes from being a samurai but death," he immediately decides he wants to run away with Akemi in hopes that he will be happy.

And it's a big step, acknowledging that he doesn't truly want greatness, but had always just assumed it was his only path to a good life. But it's clear he still hasn't really figured it out. Because if he did run off with Akemi to get married and live in the countryside, he still wouldn't be happy. Because he still doesn't know who he really is, or what it is he really wants. Marriage at this moment is the last thing he needs, and as he is now, he would be a pretty awful husband. A simple life would be good for him, but would he be good at a simple life, when he still has so much he needs to work through?

So anyway, what I'm getting at here, is that he's trying and he is learning and growing. So yeah, he is flawed, but honestly? So is Mizu. And the funny thing is that they're flawed in very similar ways.

Because Mizu is also an unhealed child. That's why she's so angry all the time. That's why she pushes people away. That's why she, just like Taigen, is so happy when given the chance to playfully wrestle in the forge, laughing and rolling around like children without shame or pretense.

Again, this shows there is no imbalance between them. They had grown up together as peers from the same town. And while Taigen had had the upper hand back then, because he'd had a gang of other kids with him, that is definitely not the case anymore. Today, they are equally flawed, equally strong, equally skilled swordsmen, and equally bull-headed.

However, yes, Mizu is definitely leagues more mature than Taigen. But she still holds a lot of childhood wounds that mirror Taigen's own. And we see this especially in relation to her mother. Similar to Taigen who had an abusive and alcoholic father, Mizu's Mama was an opium addict and had hit her, berated her, had shaved her head without her consent as a child, and as an adult, had constantly emotionally manipulated and guilt-tripped her. Mizu's love for her Mama was what had driven her to a path of vengeance in the very beginning. And when she'd found out Mama was still alive, she had wanted nothing more than her Mama's love, and it was this alone that pushed her to agree to the marriage with Mikio in the first place. And now, knowing from Fowler that her birth mother is someone else entirely, is what makes her agree to keep him alive and haul his ass to London to seek answers.

Thus, integral to Mizu's self-hatred is also Mizu's intense longing for love and family. Just like Taigen, whose pompousness comes from his insecurity about being the son of a poor fisherman, Mizu's goals are also shaped by who her parents are. Remember, her vengeance is not against just anyone who's corrupt or evil, but specifically against the men who she believes had assaulted her mother, the men she believes had made her a monster, the men she believes had abandoned her to die and continue to try to kill her. Her vengeance is against a father, on behalf of a mother. In The Tale of the Ronin and the Bride, Mizu is not merely the Ronin, the Bride, or the Onryo, but also the Child.

This is also why Ringo is so good, not only for Mizu, but for Taigen as well. Ringo is wise and caring and considerate, but above all, he is in tune with his inner child in ways that Mizu and Taigen are not. He is always earnest and positive, he sees the world with childlike wonder, but is not naive or blind to its ugliness. His whole life has been a battle. Ringo brings out the best in Mizu, consistently acting as her moral compass and conscience, and Mizu's choice to save Akemi in the final episode is only because she promised Ringo that she would. Because it's the right thing to do. Ringo inspires her to be a better person, and to think outside of her narrow-minded goal of revenge. At the same time, Ringo also brings out the best in Taigen. While at first Taigen had looked down on both Mizu and Ringo ("Half-limb to a half-wit"), by the end of the season, he's proud to have Ringo as a friend and ally, he listens to Ringo's advice ("What would Master do?"), and asserts to the fucking Shogun that Ringo is a worthy warrior to have by his side.

Okay, I've gone on a bit of a tangent here, but my main point is that Mizu and Taigen are incredibly similar. They are equals. They are both flawed, unhealed children who are chasing some impossible outlandish goal in hopes that it will fill the void in their hearts. They also both have a long way to go in terms of character development if they were to ever build a healthy romantic relationship (either with each other, or even with anyone else). So while I believe things will be rocky (because duh, it's a story, we all live for the drama, etc), I think with Ringo's help, they'll get there eventually.

#blue eye samurai #blue eye samurai meta #mizu x taigen #taigen x mizu #taimizu #taigen blue eye samurai #mizu blue eye samurai #meta dissertations.pdf #im not a taigen defender. but i AM a taimizu truther #wank.mp3 #sorta #fandom.rtf #shut up haydar #like i KNOW we all love mizu and want her for ourselves but cmon. let's be real here for a second.#ahem. hear ye! put down the delulu for a mere moment!#and ask thyself. why am i beefing with this pathetic bald man? a man who is the definition of a wet rat?#thus. my brother in nerd ass shit. i beg thee put down thy weapon. this man is not worth beefing with! he is literally... just some guy.#yes...he is bitchy. however! he is also a loser obsessed with mizu. remember this. he is not thine enemy. but simply...one of us.#also lmao like jokes aside lemme be clear. you ARE ALLOWED to hate taigen and taimizu all you like!!!! feel free to do so!!!!#but please just acknowledge it's like. a preference thing. like it's just not your cup of tea! thats A-OK!#but please dont insist that the ship is toxic unhealthy abusive etc #but if you still feel the need to do so. then for the love of god just tag your posts as anti-[insert whatever here] so it helps ppl mute #i knew how to tag shit as anti-makorra since i was fourteen! 😭 like it's basic courtesy cmon

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angeart · 6 months ago

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How dare Link correctly predict my reaction to teases, how dare (<3) YES I wanna know what prompted the upset, what well meaning thing went so wrong D: And that bit about still hoping to be loved breaks my heart for them

-🎀

the bit about still hoping to be loved broke my heart too, and that's why i needed to include it <3

so, about hermits wanting to help them. one smaller example is them taking a look at scar's tattered wings and suggesting that maybe they could help fix them. which is good!

but this comes after scar having his wings like this for about a year, and it took a long time for him to learn to accept them as they are. he's no longer ashamed of them, seeing them simply as a part of himself now. (the same way his scars have always been)

and, sure, he will still take a chance at having them healed, but it still rubs him wrong, in a way. even though it's a kind, well-meaning offer. because it proposes that he needs to be fixed.

but a whole big issue stems from something else.

we know scar and grian have changed.

grian, in particular, flinches a lot and seems scared. scar, on the other hand, often shields grian, and calls on his vex traits to intimidate the danger away, showing he's not afraid to fight. (he is afraid. he's constantly afraid.) and they're both awfully codependent, clinging to each other and isolating from everyone else.

[1,7k rambles and ~3,2k rp snippets below the cut]

one of the things they leaned into in that other world was their hybrid traits. and they show in the way they interact with each other, you know? the way they express trust and love and know what the other one needs.

well, scar is a vex.

we know there's a mating bite, but that's not everything. him and grian indulge in a lot of biting and blood related stuff. all consensual! grian is a little freak so he likes it!

it's something the two of them do, privately and intimately. it's safe, it's fun, it's theirs. them being insanely in love and ready to give all of themselves over. lose all of control on both sides, at least for a moment, in a world that hardly allows such a thing.

but here's the issue: the others don't know anything about any of it. they don't know what scar and grian have been through. they don't know anything about vex instincts or mating rituals. they don't understand anything about this new thing.

so when they see grian timid, bruised and bitten? and they know that scar seems more violent now, sharp-fanged and clawed?

let's just say they get concerned. and stage a bit of an intervention.

they just want to make sure that grian is okay! it... should be a good thing. except they've separated them and are now cornering grian, asking all these questions and voicing all these assumptions. and it's a bit awful, actually.

grian is pressed into having to explain that yeah, actually, he wanted all of that. that it's love.

but him naming the so obvious damage love just rings more alarm bells. and maybe someone asks him if it's a form of self harm, to allow that to happen to him? like, if grian seeks it out, is it self destructive? is that why he craves it?

and sort of, him and scar spiral about this in different ways.

grian struggles with untangling his way out of it, because what if they're right? what if he subconsciously sought harm? but he liked it? is it wrong to enjoy it? he knows that he had his moments when he was actively trying to bring himself damage. mostly aimed at his wings—plucking out his feathers and such. but is this just another thing like that? a substitute damage of sorts? was he just oblivious this whole time?

grian never had a previous relationship experience, so he really can't tell what is love. where does it end and Something Bad begins? he associates the bites with love, but is that bad? is he wrong? would it feel different if someone else showed him that love is something else? did he just manipulate himself into feeling like this and now he's in too deep?

at least he knows scar would never hurt him if grian says no. if grian doesn't want it. but... if grian wants it... is it self destructive? is that what it means? or maybe he was just chasing the aftermath? the soft care (that scar'd offer regardless)?

his mind is a mess and he can't figure out what his real feelings in this all are. he doesn't know how to figure it out. he gets really confused and worried and scared. (he's terrified that they're right, not necessarily for himself, but because of what that'd do to scar.) (he's scared that scar will blame himself over this. that no matter the outcome, this is inevitably going to mess something up between the two of them.)

in the meanwhile, scar feels like a monster. like maybe he was doing something wrong this whole time. was he enabling something horrible? was he genuinely hurting grian this whole time, unaware?

because he's a vex, and it makes sense to want this on his end, but grian is an avian, and... maybe scar should've questioned it more? shouldn't have been so eager to indulge? did he do something irreparably cruel without meaning to?

through this all, he reassures grian it's okay to take a break from it, or even to completely stop. it's fine! it's always been fine! but despite that, their feelings continue to spiral, caught in a maze they can't escape.

it used to be so simple. back in the vex commune. scar never had to doubt himself and the way they express their love. not when it came to this.

and now suddenly it seems so different. so vile and wrong and horrible. people are genuinely concerned and scar and grian wonder, separately, if maybe they're right to be?

... eventually they both hurtle towards a breaking point. and scar decides he needs to talk to someone about it. and grian decides he needs to be alone for a moment, becoming overwhelmed, needing some space to think.

i really want to tell you about what happens in the talk scar has with the others, but i can't. not quite yet.

anyway, this is where the breakdowns come in. (yes. multiple.)

first is scar's during the conversation he has. he gets to hear a lot of good, wise, reassuring things, but ultimately, he still needs to hear from grian. he's been trying so hard not to influence grian's conclusion to all of this, but. he needs to know grian's thoughts, once grian is ready.

grian is not ready. he's been growing so emotionally worn out from all of this, so volatile and fragile. it's all a bit Too Much.

scar messages him, checking up on him.

are you okay?

and

i'm here waiting for you whenever you come back

and

but i'll come find you if you want me to

and

i love you

... but here's the thing, right? neither scar nor grian are used to comms anymore. so grian doesn't read any of that.

they regress back to what they know.

scar howls.

grian chirps.

and only then does scar's comm ping.

come.

zero hesitation, scar unfolds his wings and jumps off the balcony, rushing towards where that chirp came from. he's being called. he's being wanted.

he'd go anywhere for grian.

he finds grian perched atop a tree. struggles to climb up, but never falters. because grian's now starting to cry, and scar needs to be there.

tucked safely into scar's gentle, loving arms, grian breaks down.

with a hitched sob, grian falls forwards into scar's arms, burrowing easily into the warmth and familiarity and security.

he wants to say he's sorry. he's sorry this is so hard for him. he's sorry he can't untangle this; sorry he can no longer tell which are his feelings and which are just things people have suggested he might feel. he's sorry he's making this so difficult. he's sorry he's worrying everyone.

but words evade him as scar's arms provide just enough safety for his guards to crumble lower, making him just sob instead.

and believe it or not, somewhere in the midst of this (hey do have a proper talk, if a bit tear-drenched) is scar's second breakdown. (grian's time to hold him!!!) that's where the rp snippet in the previous ask is from. and you'll get more of that in a second.

first i just need to tease the aftermath, because i'm a menace.

after crying and comforting their hearts out, they fly(!!!) back. there's immense relief to wind in grian's feathers, and a dangerous edge of the feeling of freedom it brings, wanting to soothe all the cracks on his soul... but the truth is, his soul is still cracked. and he's still depleted. he knows he's still hovering over something so incomprehensibly fragile. that the smallest prod will set him off and break him again.

they arrive at their nest—scar first, to warn their company not to ask questions, grian second.

it doesn't stop it from happening. grian was right: the smallest thing can set him off.

so he has another breakdown, possibly a bigger one, drawing on far deeper hurt that screams and tears at his heart. and plunges all three other people in the room into breakdowns of their own <3333

(yes that's the part we can't talk about. yet.)

aNYWAY!!! how about some rp bits.

---------------

SCAR

Despite Grian’s crying being entirely contagious— or perhaps Scar is just simply too empathetic and emotional himself— Scar’s had practice with consoling his sweet bird. He knows what he ought to do here.

He tightens his hold until it’s snug and secure, then pressed a few little kisses to whatever part of Grian’s head he can reach.

And then he talks.

“I knew you’d be up in a tree somewhere.” His voice wobbles a bit, but it’s alright. “I wanted to give you some time… I missed you though. Like immediately.”

He chuckles softly, knowing their bond borders on codependent, even if it’s something they’ve worked on since they’ve gotten home. Still, it’s okay to poke fun at it, he thinks. It’s okay to admit the truth.

GRIAN

grian's sobs quiet down a little as scar talks, energy redirected to hook into the familiar rumble of his slightly quivery voice, sniffling as he listens to what scar has to say.

it's sometimes hard to decipher the meaning of sentences when he gets like this, but scar doesn't seem to expect an answer; he's not asking him anything, and grian's grateful for being given time, a grace period where he can just cling and cry and calm down while scar holds him.

he laugh-sobs at the note that it was obvious he'd be in a tree. he's given scar a lot of hard time in the past until he figured out that lesson, but now he always knows unfailingly where to search when grian's heart needs him after cowardly isolation.

he comes every time. he comes and he finds him and he holds him.

grian sniffles, despondent, burrowing tighter in. he chirps a little to encourage scar to go on, to keep talking; the sound of it is shaky, about to fall apart to pieces, but he thinks it still counts. it's still something. a participation, not leaving scar stranded and alone in this.

OK LOOK WE HAVE TO SKIP AHEAD HERE BECAUSE [REDACTED] REASONS

GRIAN

grian hums again, fond and soft, slumped against scar with utmost trust. and then he finally says it. "'m sorry."

SCAR

"Hey, none of that, mister," Scar says, shaking his head into Grian's hair in more of a no than a nuzzle now. "It was a lot, it's okay. You needed a moment."

He places another kiss.

"And you knew I'd be here in a heartbeat when you were ready, right?" Scar grins sheepishly.

GRIAN

grian's hands trace idle patterns on scar's back as he gets comforted by words and another kiss. he closes his eyes, taking it in, before replying with a soft little "yeah."

SCAR

Scar purrs at the affection, openly so. "Doin' a little better now?"

GRIAN

grian nods, still right against scar, clingily pressed into him. "yeah, i... yeah."

SCAR

Scar doesn't budge, not interested in releasing his darling bird just yet. "...what's on your mind?" he prompts softly, hoping to get a glimpse at Grian's inner turmoil.

GRIAN

with eyes still closed, grian lets the pause linger just a moment, before replying with a quiet but honest, "right now? how nice this feels."

SCAR

Scar chuckles again, a little anxiety getting settled by that fact, though certainly not all. "Oh, well that's good, yes. I agree with that sentiment entirely."

GRIAN

"good," grian purrs, squeezing at scar. "'coz i don't wanna lose it."

SCAR

Scar's ears twitch, something awfully depressing in those few words. "Hey, no, never," he assures. "This is never going away, okay?"

Since he seriously doubts cuddling is about to give anyone the wrong ideas.

GRIAN

grian has to swallow several times for his feelings to not go off the rails again. he takes a shaky breath, still squeezing at scar, as if he was afraid he might disappear. "... okay."

SCAR

"And neither am I!" Scar tacks on, even if it should go without saying. Even if it may be a little dramatic. But he thinks maybe Grian needs to hear that fact stated with absolute certainty. "I love you too dang much."

GRIAN

that gets grian to loosen his grip a little, enough to shuffle and look up. hair messy and eyes glistening and red rimmed, he looks up at scar with so much aching adoration, it feels like he might drown.

"i think it's okay if— if we love each other in our own way," he says sheepishly. he ducks down, laying his head on scar's shoulder, feeling shy as his hands go back to tracing patterns on scar's lower back. "even if the others don't understand or agree." there's a precipice of a pause, and then the most timid little "... right?"

SCAR

Scar's heart stutters, and his ears flick up again with carefully optimistic anticipation at Grian's words. His eyes threaten to flood over again, but the tears feel different, more cathartic, less miserable.

He tucks his head over Grian's again, brushing his cheek over his locks affectionately, daring to release a few hopeful tears as Grian says what he desperately hoped he might.

"I..." he starts, still trying not to influence this decision if he can help it, but... "I think so. ...I mean it's—" He thinks of [REDACTED], and chuckles wetly, morphing them in his own Scar-silly way. "It's not really anyone else's business what we do in the bedroom, is it?"

GRIAN

grian's hands still against scar's back, simply holding him for a moment as he soaks up scar's nuzzles. there's wetness to them, something that makes grian's heart ache as he worries about all the possible meanings, but hopes against all hope that it's just scar getting positively emotional—a relief of sorts above all else.

a small strained chuckle makes it past his lips, and he muffles it into a kiss that he presses into scar's shoulder. "right. exactly."

SCAR

Scar weakly smiles, giving Grian a squeeze. "...but seriously, I— you know it's okay if we stop, right? If you ever change your mind— and I mean your mind, nobody else's— then it's fine! But... I... yeah." Another squeeze. "I just want to be sure you know that."

GRIAN

there's a barely stifled sigh, but no hint of tension pools across grian's back. his hold remains still and gentle, his head idly leaning on scar's shoulder. "i know," he murmurs.

SCAR

"Good," Scar states, ducking lower so his forehead presses into Grian for a moment before releasing just enough so he could escape the big bear hug if he wanted. “... you know, [REDACTED]”

WE ARE ACTUALLY TAKING ANOTHER LEAP, ANOTHER SKIP, ANOTHER SCRIBBLED OUT SECTION. bear with us <33

SCAR

[REDACTED VERY REDACTED] “I mean, I had to learn all this vex stuff, too. It’s not… I mean it’s certainly not the most family-friendly sort of culture but that doesn’t mean it’s wrong, does it?”

GRIAN

grian blinks at that, lifting his head in attention. this really surprises him, for some reason. that [WOO REDACTED AGAIN WOW]

"oh." he takes a moment, leaning slightly back, inviting scar's touch a little bit further. "yeah... yeah, i think he's—" he bounces the words around in his head again, then settles on: "it's a learning curve every way, isn't it? whenever there's new instincts and..." he skirts around the words mating rituals, feeling a faint warmth rise up to his cheeks. he looks away briefly, teething at his bottom lip as he thinks of all the worries he himself used to have, all the mistakes kane made, all the effort and talking and correcting it took for things to finally have it all sink in the proper way.

he clears his throat, shyly looking back at scar, but then his gaze anchors and softens. his hand travels up from scar's chin, brushing through his hair, tucking a strand behind his ears. "it's not wrong."

SCAR

“It’s not?” Scar asks meekly, even though he was the one to propose so first. To have Grian confirm it is so much more important. Because even if they can agree it’s not wrong for Scar to have sought out these things, ultimately he wants it to be right for Grian as well.

Scar chews at his lip nervously, but still tilts toward the offered affection, absolutely weak to it.

GRIAN

"mmm." grian lets his fingers brush through scar's hair again, gentle with him at every step. "it's not wrong," he repeats softly.

SCAR

Scar opens his eyes, both of them glistening with potential tears, but he offers up a weak, wobbly smile, appreciating every graze of Grian’s fingers. “…is it— it’s not wrong for you either?”

GRIAN

grian takes in scar's expression and he leans in for a short kiss. "it's not wrong for me," he murmurs, right over scar's lips.

and maybe he still feels confused, and maybe he still has some exploring and figuring out to do, just to really settle things in his heart, but he knows scar will be there with him every step of the way. just like he knows that [REDACTED] is right—scar is good for him.

and he wants all of him.

SCAR

The tears fall alongside a pitiful little chuckle, but Scar leans right back in for another kiss, not caring at all for the wetness that streaks down his cheeks.

They can match now. It’s fine.

“I… I’m—?” Scar falters, and he laughs again, ducking his head down in slight embarrassment. He can’t even bring himself to say it. To even imply that he was worried that he was wrong for Grian. “…okay.”

GRIAN

the sight of tears breaks grian's heart. still keeping one arm around scar, hoping it'd make him feel close and secure, he lowers his other hand from scar's hair to his cheek, gently collecting the wetness even as scar leans in for a kiss. (one that grian gladly gives.)

even though scar doesn't finish his question, grian can connect the dots. he remembers the time when he himself thought he's not good for scar, and he knows how awful and heavy that self doubt was.

with utmost tenderness, he kisses scar's cheek, right in the path of wetness, while his fingers gently brush the tears on the other side. "scar." it's quiet, reverent. irredeemably loving.

he pulls away, wanting scar to look at him as he says this. his wings twitch, brushing over scar's, curling inwards towards him. pressing against scar's sides under scar's wings as grian lets go of his back in favour of cupping his face, thumbs brushing over cheeks.

"scar, you're good for me."

he strings up the words, slow and deliberate and certain.

SCAR

It’s Scar’s turn to break again, clearly, as his eyes water over and big, wet tears fall down his cheeks and collect over Grian’s hands. He doesn’t even have words to respond with, just wide, grateful eyes and wobbly lips that can’t decide between a cry or a smile.

His hands also find their way over Grian’s, though one escapes to run his own thumb over Grian’s cheek in turn, still feeling the dampness there. It’s oddly comforting.

“…sometimes I worry the hermits don’t think that,” he admits, gaze flicking away as he tries to keep a strong facade. (Hard to do while he’s actively crying, but it could certainly be worse.)

GRIAN

"oh, scar." grian sighs, heartbroken, brows pulling into a pained frown upon hearing that admission. he can hardly bear this, knowing scar's been made to feel like this.

he leans in to press a kiss to his forehead, wings slinking further along, wrapping around scar right underneath his vex wings. he wants to cocoon them into warmth and safety, away from these treacherous feelings.

the hermits managed to somehow break both of them down, with nothing more than good intentions.

grian hates the uncertain, askew feeling that pushes bitter bile up his throat, telling him maybe they're not quite right for this place anymore. that they forgot how to belong, but nobody has caught up yet and still expects them to be their selves that they can no longer reach.

“you know [REDACTED I AM SO SORRY]” he attempts a smile, though it's hard. he tugs at scar, wanting to pull him in for a hug, tuck him underneath his own chin, all safe and protected, but he leaves it up to scar whether he wants that or needs more breathing room right now.

"maybe they need time. i... i've been hiding away a lot and. honestly i don't think they can tell what's good for me anymore. not right now." it's hard to admit. "even if they mean well." but well-meaning that hurts both him and scar is just meddlesome.

maybe they needed this though, in a way. it would be better if it came from a different place, subtler, gentler, but still. maybe they needed to work through exactly these feelings.

"anyone who says you're not good for me will get smacked," he threatens, remembering scar's (and kane's) offers to bite people who look at grian wrong, in a way returning the favour. "'coz they're wrong and they have no business spewing nonsense."

SCAR

Scar gladly takes up the offer to be smothered in affection, and he boldly chooses to corporealize his wings fully and gently tug them around the base of Grian's, knowing well that wing-on-wing contact is almost always acceptable. And right now that sort of thing brings immense comfort to him, too. It's something they both share, after all. A pair of wings and a pair of patched up hearts.

"I know they mean well..." Scar whines into Grian's chest this time, and though there's no cozy shawl to bury himself in, it's just as comforting. "but they don't know everything, and... and I know that's mostly on us, but god it's just... it's so much sometimes, Grian."

It's not exactly pleasant to recall those memories. To try to explain just how horrific it was to their old friends. To look them in the eyes and admit that they're different now because they had to be. (And how they still hope to be loved despite it all.)

GRIAN

grian wraps scar up in his arms, holding him close. one hand in scar's hair, the other sliding down between his shoulderblades, rubbing at that point between his wings, unaware he's copying exactly what [REDACTED] did earlier.

the pressure of scar's wings over his own helps him settle a little, gives him comfort and courage through this glass-shards of a conversation.

"they don't know everything," he echoes quietly, kissing the top of scar's head before he leans his cheek on it, cradling him. "i just wish..." he closes his eyes and tugs at scar, holds him a little bit tighter. he doesn't really know how to finish that sentence; all the words feel like they're crashing and splintering over sharp cliffs.

all that's left in the rubble is a weary sense of defeat. "it is so much," he agrees. "it's so tiring to... they expect us to be..." he doesn't finish any of his sentences, but he wonders if scar understands anyway.

SCAR

Scar understands perfectly. He nods softly as he listens, lulled in by those soft touches, tears drying as he lets Grian’s presence fully engulf him.

“…they expect us to be the same,” Scar finishes for him, certain that Grian’s had the same trouble he has, though perhaps to a different degree. “And… maybe we won’t ever be. But… I don’t think all the ways we changed are bad. Like— sure, we’re still messed up and jumpy and… and I mean, frankly traumatized, but…” There’s an effort to poke his head up, but Scar finds himself too reluctant to leave the comfort of Grian’s arms just yet. “We’re also in love. And… we have a new appreciation for life. And each other.” A half-sniffle, half-chuckle gets stuffed into Grian’s chest. “…is that too sappy?”

GRIAN

grian chuckles mirthlessly at the list of things they suck at, their reactions and trauma stitched close to them like their shadow, endless and monstrous, looming behind their every step. but scar is right: they have changed in so many messed up ways, and they might never be the same, but... it's not all bad.

"we're in love," grian echoes, a notch lighter, just a little bit amused that the list of dark things ends with a complete shift, plunging them into sappiness. it's such a scar-like thing to do; he's aware of just how bad things have gotten, but that doesn't mean he won't fight to dredge up every little optimistic and hopeful thing out of it anyway.

grian loves it. it's gotten him through many dark times, this quality that scar has. his tenacious way of thinking and latching onto bright things, even if it's a barely flickering flame amidst complete, terrifying darkness.

he kisses his head again and then nuzzles against his hair, humming. "it's scar level sappy," he replies, mulling it, before landing on: "which means it's perfect."

the only time scar's level of sappy is too much is when he's flustering grian, but he's not going to point that out, in case scar takes it as a challenge to compare the two right here and right now. (he'd be capable. grian knows.)

he rubs at scar's back again, humming a soft melody, wanting to calm him further. but there's one thing even he can unearth from the ashes, something written into all their stitches and scars.

"we survived."

nothing can beat that. no matter how they've changed, or what they can now see in a different light.

they made it.

"and we're good for each other."

SCAR

Scar giggles at the term. Scar-level sappy, indeed. His own brand of optimism, wrapped in layers of insecurity but boundless levels of adoration.

And it got him this far, didn’t it?

“We survived,” Scar repeats, because that’s so damn important. They survived. And they did it because they were together.

Because they’re good together.

“…the power of love,” Scar adds, soft and sentimental and maybe just a bit goofy, hoping to turn the tides from tears to mirthful laughter.

GRIAN

once again he gets grian to giggle in a fragile moment—a talent scar has and grian values. in retaliation, he shifts his hands, brings them much closer, until he can tease at scar's ears.

"we survived, so now i can do this!" his cheeks are still wet, and he feels depleted from all the heavy emotions, but he still manages a grin as he tries to make scar squirm.

SCAR

Scar barks out a fit of genuine laughter, somewhat startled by the shift, but he can’t complain when his lips are suddenly tipped into a bright smile and his ears are flicking wildly at the affectionate abuse.

“Hey!! No fair! I’ve been so gentle!!” he cackles, already shedding that mercy and tickling at Grian’s ribs.

---------------

aaand i'm going to end on this note (because you know it devolves again. we're good at making things fall apart repeatedly <3 a great angst loop if you ask me.)

but, i'm going to leave you with a little bonus. which is what me and link talked about today. on this same topic, really.

which is how scar changed. hermits know him as the guy who dies a lot, right? also easily distracted, carefree, easily dissipating into giggles, easily brushing things off. all of that.

he could get startled by a fly. he'd yelp and stumble and fall over when he got scared.

but that other world forced other things on him. it forced him to be brave, or at least, to seem like it. forced him to fight to keep himself and grian safe. fight for them both to survive.

now when he gets scared? there are wings and claws and fangs.

he couldn't show weakness in that world, you know?

and it sticks. it sinks its talons into him and holds.

the only person he shows weakness around is grian. and... maybe if he'd been willing to show it more around the other hermits, they'd see that he's still scar.

that he's still scar and he's hurting and afraid.

(yes blame link for this heartbreak brb sobbing with u)

also. a potential conversation:

someone saying to grian (while scar is also possibly there): "scar came back... wrong."

grian angrily counters with "no, scar came back different but not wrong."

and then

quieter

"... i came back wrong."

because, think about it. scar changed, but it can be argued that some of it is better and he's just being misunderstood. but grian? grian can't imagine any good coming from how he's now.

he didn't grow braver or kinder or stronger or any of those things. he just caused [REDACTED]. he's a scared, hurting mess. there's nothing good about him now.

as link said in our discord dms: scar needs to scoop grian up and remind him that he's here for the whole ride. he'll be here while grian learns to heal.

because he will heal.

#ange answers #ribbon anon #hhau #cw abuse allegations #cw self harm #uh #i don't know what's a good tag to use to make this safe #if i need to add any cws please please do not hesitate to let me know!!!#vex scar #this is post return pre wedding #buch of this was flat out copied from discord dms #so hopefully it makes sense all stitched together #angst and breakdowns #also yes here's a proof we wildly swing in the rp reply length #from a single line to “all the way to discord nitro character limit”#sorry for the redacted bits #it was the only way i could share all this with u #pls don't hate #(but also. are you scared of all the REDACTED bits yet—)#one day (if i'll remember) i'll uncover all of these redacted parts #grian and scar struggle so so so hard with letting people in after everything #hope u enjoyed this mess <33 #fyi the biting thing started in the hotspring bit which i am still uhhhh #working on those rambles

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