#also ow she finds a piece of him that was lost to time therefore she wouldn't mess up anything for him not having it

[herleaf]

While he continued to process the implications of Clara being there, all the memories of the past and what it meant for her to be there. Most likely in that giant, tragic mind of his, he was imagining the worlds that she'd been to and all that she had lost. He'd suppress the questions, wanting to stay in naivety, knowing answers would only lead to definitives. Blaming himself, stewing in that self-loathing that only he knew so well. What should she say?

Should she hint at her travels, mention that she'd sometimes been in the same place only moments after his TARDIS had left? That she had played the role of The Doctor the way that she had with those Cybermen all those years ago. When they had gone to save Danny. Sweet Danny, the man who chose to substitute his life for the life of a child. Her sweet, selfless maths teacher -- what would he think of what she'd become? Surely he would tell her that she was continuing her cycle, fearing the end. Possibly being selfish because perhaps the end had him in it...

and she would let him believe it.

She would say it was her fault, that she wasn't ready for the adventure to end. She would wax poetic, words falling from her a mile a minute, as her gaze would dart around just as fast. Trying not to look him in the eye because she was good at lying, so long as you didn't look her in the eyes. Her eyes would water far too much to feign honesty, her heart breaking when looking at someone she loved so much and see the sadness shine back at her. Sadness and hurt that was constantly being caused by her.

Shaking her head to bring herself out of her own self-revere, she began stalking around the cell, fingers running against the grout of the walls, knocking every few inches to hear if there was anything hollow, be it an escape or a place where they knew they could sonic their way out. Or, kick it. She didn't know what this Doctor's style was.

"Borrowed a bit of your wife's lipstick. Packs a hefty hypnotic punch. Plus, you'd be surprised how far batting your eyelashes and twirling your hair can get you." It was said so nonchalantly, but she knew the words would effect him. Did she want them to? Was she mad still, despite knowing it was the only way for them to go on, that he forgot her? He forgot his impossible girl, the one who he brought back from the dead. The one who he would live countless lifetimes to bring back, only to be erased so easily. He'd remembered multiple echoes of her, sought her out from era to era to figure out her mystery, so why didn't that empty feeling he told her about in the diner fuel him to look even for just moments more? God, she truly was selfish, pushing blame onto the Time Lord despite knowing the universe depended on it.

Dying millions of times to save the Doctor also kept the universe afloat but you never see her complaining.

No, this echo--no, this Clara--was cross with herself for taking too long. For staying around and doing what Ashildr--Mayor Me--had promised him. She was protecting the people the Doctor couldn't, but not against him. She was doing it for him.

All life is worth fighting for, after all.

Her fingertips grazed ever so slightly against her pulse point-- well, where her pulse point should be, out of habit. It was strangely her form of being pinched to confirm she was awake, feeling the texture against her fingertips being an ever-present reminder of why she was doing what she was doing.

"I also used this," Realizing that she didn't want to keep things from him this early into their reunion, she reached into the pocket that was inside of her blazer, pulling out a withered and decrepit looking sonic, "You told me it was useless but Ashildr said you were a liar. That you were scared. I said you were calculated. To be honest, we were both being completely stupid, going back to a time where I was, but when have you ever known me to shy away from the stupidly dangerous? If I ever did that we wouldn't have gone on half the trips we did."

Turning around to face him, eyebrows furrowed in the way that they did whenever he was processing a plan. Trying to figure out where his mind was going and in which directions she could pick up the pieces that his brilliant mind would gloss over, how it used to be. "Reversing the airlocks, it would work to disarm them but could far too easily be twisted into an act or terrorism that both could point fingers for. Bit too risky at such a pivotal time, could lead to massacres." Nose scrunches once more as her finger comes up to press against her chin in thought, "No, there must be a secret, sneakier way out of here. These bozos treat their cells like messed up escape rooms, seeing who is smart enough to plot a prison break. It's how you get intelligence -- or, for the ones who refuse to join and are disposed of -- weaknesses in the cells themselves. They want to find the best of the best and if they say no to an alliance the prisoners obviously weren't worthy. It's like a mouse trap, we just need to think like a bloodthirsty species that would watch escapes and misery for their own enjoyment. If we can both maneuver around the TARDIS, surely we can figure this out. We just need to think heist."

Shall we?

Always so ready to go, always within her element ; The Doctor knew that there was so much more to her than that. Brave, impossible, clever, and so, so Clara. Seeing her again brought back memory after memory. From the second he heard her voice on that Dalek Asylum, to the first time he had seen her in Victorian London (the sting of the loss of Amy and Rory still gripping his hearts). And then their first meeting, the mystery, and every adventure since. All of which that had accumulating in the 4.5 billion years he had spent in a confession dial trying to save her life, as well as landing him on Gallifrey for one of the last times before it's destruction.

He wouldn't apologise for those years, for the desperate attempt to try and keep her in this universe. But he would apologise for who she is now. For how she's still alive; because she had known. She had known that she should've gone back to Gallifrey, should've walked to her death with her head held high, but who can blame her for getting distracted on the way? For, undoubtably, taking one last trip around the universe? In the TARDIS that she had pinched from Gallifrey itself? Behaviour which she had gotten from him, a way of life that she had learned from him. Who can blame her?

It had clearly stopped her from returning in time. And that? That was his fault. The result of their friendship, the result of their travels and time together. But that was a concept, an idea, he wouldn't allow himself to think too much into - although the worry had been there from the day he had found out that Gallifrey had been destroyed again. Just because that worry was confirmed now, did not mean it was the time to beat himself up over it. Or to judge her in any way for her delay or her fate. The Doctor has enough weight on his hearts without that. And if nothing else, this regeneration of his had told him that sometimes there was such a thing as too much blame; too much trauma.

"Oh, so much to catch up on. You have no idea." On his end, Bill, Missy, Yaz, Ryan, Graham, Dan and Gallifrey - The Time Lords and The Master. He knows how Clara responded to The Time Lords, knows what she thinks of them, and it makes him wonder just how much she'd understand The Master's actions, once she finds out the reason for them. The Timeless Child, oh, and the not knowing or understanding what he is or where he came from. And The Doctor thinks he knows how she'd respond to that one, too. Because he remembers her. Every part of her. She'd tell him to get a grip, and that he's The Doctor. Always is, always had been and always would be.

And the thought of that made him smile, because even though she hadn't said it, even though he doesn't know what she'd actually say or do, she's still there. In his mind, making him feel better, even when she's also right in front of him.

So he's not going to lie. He's not going to hide. He's going to tell her the truth, about everything, in more ways than he had told anyone else. Because he thinks he needs it. And because he has no one else. And finally, because he still trusts her, with all of his being. So he'll have the opportunity to find out soon enough, what she thinks.

But for now they need to focus on getting out of there.

"Right - uh- air conditioning." And he turns his focus to the problem at hand, motioning to Clara as he moves back towards the door. "They're going to use the air conditioning system to spread a toxin all over this space station. It's the easiest way to take out their opposition; two political parties out in one sweep, we JUST need to find a way to get past them." The guards, who think they're protecting their political parties by locking them up. Something told The Doctor that they weren't going to listen to them if they tried to explain. A plan that never works, so what next? "How did you get in here? Actually - seriously - what did you do to get past them?"

[bts-hyperfixation]

Tempting Tutelage

A Taehyung x Reader Fanfiction

Summer Madness 9/32 When you begin to fall behind in one of your university courses, you enlist the help of your childhood friend, Kim Taehyung, to help you pass the semester.

Please note the course mentioned is entirely made up and therefore complete and utter bullshit and I entirely lost the plot while writing about it...

“Ooooh Taae Taae.” You sing song.

You catch the man walking out of the university music rooms after band practice. You watch as he glances around for who could possibly be calling like that until his eyes settle on you. He looks completely confused to find you are the owner of the cheerful call, but not unhappy.

“Y/N-ah, you haven’t called me that since we were kids. To what do I owe the pleasure?” He asks, strolling away from his band friends towards you.

It’s true, you stopped calling him TaeTae when you were both eleven. You decided he was too old for that nickname now and he had finally grown into his full name. It had been almost a decade since then. You also hadn’t been quite so close since then, drifting apart into separate social circles as you grew older, pulling you away from one another as is natural with kids. It’s a small miracle that neither of you ended up adjusting your life plans and heading to the same university, although that had more to do with the courses they had on offer than ending up together.

“I need a teensy weency favour.” You say batting your eyelashes.

“How teensy weency?” He asks, eyebrow raised in suspicion.

The last time you had called in a favour involved a first-year party and way too many jello shots.

Although technically your mom had called in that favour when she received a phone call from one of

your coursemates asking for your address. She had sent Taehyung to fetch you. That had been the

first time you had spoken to him since graduation.

You hold your fingers out demonstrating a pinch to show how small the favour was.

“Does it involve holding your hair back or sleeping on the floor in any way?”

You cringe as he teases. He had ended up staying with you all night just to make sure you didn’t choke. You had offered him your bed, you were too attached to the toilet anyway, but he refused. Instead, he kept you company on the bathroom floor, dragging your pillows in to protect you from the cold tile. You thanked every star that night that you forked out for the ensuite.

“It definitely does not.” You confirm.

"Great! Let's go get food and you can tell me more. Your treat of course.”

“Of course.”

_______________________________________

“So what do you need me for exactly?” Taehyung asks, muffled slightly by his food

He has always talked with his mouth full. He shoves more of the burger into his mouth as he

waits for you to explain.

“I’m taking ‘Contemporary Music and its Influence on today’s media landscape’ this semester. And I’m flunking hard. But I happen to know you got one of the highest scores when you took it last semester.”

“I did!” He says proudly. “So you want my notes?”

“No, I want you to tutor me. Just reading the information isn’t helping it to sink in. I think I need someone who is actually interested in the topic, professor Dodd is possibly the least inspiring man I have ever heard.”

“That sounds like more than a small favour.” He points out. “Like multiple hours a week worth of a

favour.”

“I’ll make it worth your while Tae Tae, pretty pretty pretty please help me.”

You fix him with your best puppy dog eyes you can muster, the kind that used to get him to give you the last piece of his candy. Being older there is a chance it looks a lot more desperate than cute, but that can’t be hurting your case.

He deliberates for a while, dramatically umming and ahhing while he finishes his meal. He drags his last fry through the ketchup on his plate and then savours every last chew. You tap your fingers annoyed on the tabletop. At this point his only answer could be yes, he just likes to milk the attention, as always: Band geek/drama nerd/debate club extraordinaire, any club with a spotlight. Any club you never had an interest in.

“Okay, when and where?” He asks, putting you out of your misery.

“My place? Thursday nights?”

“Works for me.”

_______________________________________________________

The first session is difficult. It is immediately apparent to Taehyung why you are failing. You lack any semblance of focus. Every time he looks down to check his notes your mind has wandered off. You just don’t seem to want to connect with the material at all. You’re either gazing out of the window or trying to change the topic entirely.

The third time he catches you watching the university football team out of the window he hits you around the head with his notepad. Not enough to hurt, just enough to bring your attention back to him. He stands and huffily closes the curtain.

“Why am I even here?” He grumbles, hands on his hips.

It’s rare to see Taehyung annoyed. He still looks the same as when you were kids, pouting more than scolding. It makes you want to laugh but you somewhat successfully stifle it with what you hope is a remorseful look. Judging by the way his nostrils flair, it’s not remorseful enough. 

“Seriously Y/N, I’m only here because you said you wanted help, I have much better things to be

doing with my time.”

“I know Tae, I’m really sorry. I just don’t get it. I thought it would be more based on modern music, you know the 00’s and 10’s, not the whole of the last century. It’s just so dull...” You whine.

“Now you’re trying to insult me on purpose, I’m sure of it.” He grasps at imaginary pearls, scandalised. “I don’t think I can teach you.”

“It’s not as if I find all music from before we were born unlistenable, just the stuff Professor Dodd choses.” You say, trying to rescue yourself.

Taehyung looks unconvinced like you are clutching at straws just to save face.

“Right, let me think about it over the weekend, I will find some new music you can use to relate to the course and try to salvage your grade.”

“You’re an angel.” You squeak, leaping up to hug him.

He blushes, the tips of his ears going red and hastily pushes you away.

"Yeah, yeah. whatever. What’s for dinner?" He asks changing the subject.

The following session provides a little more promise. Although it feels a lot more like hanging out and listening to music than it does studying... 

Taehyung insisted that each of his carefully crafted music choices was to be listened to in the most authentic way possible. And so your evening began with the two of you laying side by side on his bed listening to a mixtape of his favourite early eighties tracks using a Walkman that looked like it had certainly seen better days. 

You each took a headphone and he talked you through each song that played and how it revolutionised music. Admittedly you were more interested in the passion with which he conveyed his thoughts than the music itself, but it did seem to be working. Every few songs (When a cassette side ended and he had to pause and switch) he would quiz you on the information he had just relayed and you were getting a solid 70%.

You found yourselves drifting closer together until your arms were pressed up against each other. You tried not to focus too much on that. Instead, you immerse yourself in the music, and it really starts to feel like you can understand where Taehyung is coming from when he speaks. He hasn’t told you the title of this song yet, but it feels a lot like the drum is beating in time to your heart and it makes your brain go a little fuzzy.

“Y/N?” Taehyung asks, staring at you.

It is clear in the furrow of his brow that he had tried more than once to get your attention. Misconstruing your concentration for daydreaming, he huffs and pulls the earbud away from you.

“Right, when did I lose you?” He asks putting the cassette player back in the drawer in his bedside table.

"You didn’t this time I promise.” You protest.

He just shakes his head, clearly not believing you.

“It doesn’t matter, I think we were lying down for too long anyway.”

He crosses his small dorm and switches on an old record player. The song that starts playing is pretty, something you might hear during a dance scene in a movie like Grease. It doesn’t capture you the

same way the cassette had, but Taehyung does. He starts to sway to the beat, flourishing his arms and clicking in time to the music. He bites his lips and closes his eyes completely taken over by the music as it plays. He carries on until the song begins to blend into the next.

Then his eyes fall open and find you, his hand extended in invitation.

“Care to dance?”

He doesn’t really give you a chance to answer, taking your arm and dragging you to him. He holds you close and starts to sway again, turning you in circles together.

You relax into his hold, slotting yourself into him like a puzzle piece. Your head fits perfectly in the crook of his neck. You would admit, if he were to ask you anything about the songs as they play through you would not be able to answer a single question. You really can’t recall a single thing he has said since he pulled you into his arms.

“Y/N-ah?” his voice is uncharacteristically calm.

You pull back and look into his eyes, a timid blush has spread across his cheeks, one you are sure is mirrored on your own features.

“Yeah?” You ask, pressing against him a little more.

“I... I don’t think I’m really teaching anymore.”

He coughs to break the tension and lets you out of his arms. He hurries back to the record player and almost scratches the disc with how fast he turns it off.

“I think that’s enough for tonight.” He says, gathering your things for you.

You nod a little disappointed. Although he is definitely right, it feels like your brain might explode if you take in any more information. You take your things from his arms and walk out of his room as he opens the door for you.

“What did you want to get for dinner today?” You ask.

“You know what? I’m not that hungry... Rain check?”

“You’ve always been a terrible liar...” His stomach growls as you speak as if to prove your point.

“I just don’t feel like going out for dinner today.” He shrugs. “But bring your wallet next week, I’ll go all out to make up for this week.”

He grins as wide as he can and you decide not to push the issue. 

_________________________________

The following week proves to be far less intimate as you sit on Taehyung’s bed with him across the room messing around with a boom box you could’ve sworn he didn’t own last time.

When he finally has it working he still doesn’t join you on the bed, opting for the rather uncomfortable-looking desk chair. You write notes as he talks you through different cultural impacts.

It feels like he is watching you but every time you glance up he is conveniently looking anywhere but at you. This goes on for almost an hour before you huff impatiently. You find yourself becoming frustrated with the materials again, struggling to make connections between Taehyung’s words and the textbook contents.

He finally meets your gaze, questioning your little outburst.

“I can’t concentrate.” You complain.

“I can see that.”

He gestures down at your notepad where your last few notes were just an incoherent scribble rather than useful information.

“Let's try and make it more interesting...” Taehyung thinks for a moment.

He bites his bottom lip as his brain works through a possible plan. You find your own mind wandering back in time as you watch him nibble on his lip, not unlike how he looked dancing on his own.

Just as your mind is about to venture off into thinking about how attractive Taehyung has grown up to become, he has an aha moment. His face lights up like someone had actually held a lightbulb above his head.

“Let’s play 20 questions! I’ll play a couple of songs, quiz you on them, and then for every answer you get right you can ask me absolutely anything.” He suggests.

“What makes you think I want to know things about you? I already know all about you.” You point out.

“You know a lot about eleven-year-old me, that’s a lot of missing years... Plus I never said they had to be about me. I’m good friends with the football guys you so admire watching out of your window."

You were surprised he brought up the football guys. Mostly because you had completely forgotten about watching their practice instead of listening to Tae, it was mostly just to give you something else to focus on. You are also intrigued by the fact that Taehyung thinks you don’t know that much about him.

“Okay, you’re on.”

He presses play on the boom box again and you try hard to listen to what he is telling you. He asks you five questions. You answer two with what he deems to be a satisfactory answer.

"Okay hit me.” He says.

You think about it for a moment. There are very few things you can think of to ask him. You don’t know what you don’t know after all. You think really hard, but the only thing that comes to mind is prom and you are fairly certain you know what happened there... still it’s a starting point.

“Where were you at the end of prom when your award was announced?”

His eyes widen as if he never thought you’d ask about something so long ago. You were curious though, you had seen him flirting with his date and then they both disappeared, except she came back, but he never did. When his date reappeared she looked a bit dishevelled and people just assumed Taehyung and her had made it somewhere in the school. But that didn’t explain why he never came back if she did.

“You don’t know? I thought my date told the entire school all about that...” He seems genuinely surprised.

You shake your head.

“We had been dating for a couple of months, and we were getting off after prom... I told her some... things... I would like to try in bed and she slapped me and walked away. Decided not to return with the red handprint etched on my face.”

“She hit you?”

This time he shrugged.

“I guess she really wasn’t into what I was in to.”

“What were you in to?” You ask, hanging off the bed, intrigued.

“Nope, that’s question number three, a question you have yet to earn.”

You grumble a little but then let him continue with his lesson. This time you pay better attention, earning yourself three out of five questions.

“So... what were you in to?”

“Wow, don’t even want to start with a filler question? Lead up to that one? No... Okay. Back then I wasn’t into anything that weird I liked to spank my partners, maybe fuck their mouths a little bit. Nothing huge.”

“That seems like a lot for an eighteen-year-old.” You point out but he just shrugs.

“I was a bad judge of what was normal, a lot of weird shit went down at that drama summer camp I did."

“So I take it that wasn’t your first time then?”

“No, no it was not.” He nods.

“But it was hers?”

“Yes, yes it was.” He confirms again.

You open your mouth to ask another question but he holds a hand up to silence you and presses play again. He allows you bonus points on these questions. Racking your total up to six. You really think about it, determined not to waste these questions like you did the last two.

“You said those things in past tense like you aren’t in to them any more. Did you move on to more normal sex or weirder kinks?”

“Well, that really depends on what you think of as weird.”

His answer avoids the question, and he knows it. You’ve wasted another question and he wants you to be more specific.

“What are your kinks Taehyung?” You ask point blank.

“I’m not sure you’re ready for that answer.” He counters.

“That didn’t answer my question.” You pout.

“It did, it just wasn’t the answer you were looking for.” He smiles like he has won the game.

You just pout back, no longer interested in playing his question game if that's how he wants to play.

“Fine, fine. Answer a question for me, that's not about the course material and I will answer your question properly.”

“Promise?”

“I promise... and that counts as a question. You are down to three... Well three and a half I guess.”

“Just ask your question.” You grumble.

“Do you have any kinks?” You search for the joke in his eyes, but all mirth has disappeared as he waits for your answer.

“I... I don’t know.”

“How can you not know?” He asks, shocked.

“You said I had to answer one question and I did. Your turn.”

You stick your tongue out as you beat him at his own game.

“Fine... I have a lot of kinks. Some of my favourites? Praise, spitting, oh and breath control... Can you tell me how you don’t know now?”

“I’ve never really looked into it my last boyfriend was very interested in only carrying out the missionary position and I guess I wasn’t really invested enough to look into other things. The sex was fine, I just thought that’s what sex is supposed to be.”

“Tell me you’re joking...”

“I’m not.”

"Well, that's exceedingly depressing to hear Y/N-ah" His eyes fill with pity.

He finally moves from the desk, sliding on the bed next to you and taking your hands.

You glance down at where he is rubbing his thumbs over your knuckles. Everything suddenly feels a little too hot. You've not even been into detail about your lack of a sex life with your closest friends. 

"Maybe we should get back to studying." You say trying to change the topic.

You tug at your hands but Taehyung doesn't release them.

"I can help you with this too... if you want." He says.

You expect him to laugh, to pull away, to show some sign that he is joking. But it never comes. 

"You can't be serious. you aren't serious... Are you?"

"I've never been more serious in my life. And you have two questions left."

But he doesn't let you ask another one.

His lips are pressed up against yours, his hand relinquishing your own in favour of winding around your waist. He pushes against you forcing you to lie back on the bed. His tongue flicks against your lips and you allow him past. He explores a little before growing impatient and starting to kiss along your chin and down your throat.

His teeth graze along the column of your throat and his tongue dips into any crevices it finds.

"Taehyung.. shouldn't we talk about this?" 

"We will talk about this. In a minute." mumbles against your skin.

He pulls at the collar of your T-shirt to allow himself better access to your skin. He sucks a trail of purpling hickies from your collarbone to your shoulder. He makes a point of biting harder as he reaches the end, leaving you with a distinctive imprint of his teeth. 

"Are you going to be a good girl and let me show you how good sex can actually feel?" He makes firm eye contact as he waits for your answer.

The way his personality switches makes you shiver, the little praise making your legs twitch together.

"And how are you going to show me?" 

Instead of coming out strong and rebellious like you had hoped, your voice is breathy as if he had literally taken the air from your lungs. You grimace at your attempt making him chuckle. He reaches up to push your hair out of your face, leaving his palm on your cheek.

"I am going to take care of you in a way that's going to have you feeling like a princess while treating you like a whore."

He kisses you again with bruising force, teeth nibbling along your bottom lip. His hand slides from your face to the base of your throat, applying just a little pressure.

"Is this okay?" He asks.

You nod causing his hand to tighten slightly, and again your body tingles under his touch.

"Great, my hand is going to keep getting tighter. It will always be safe but if you want to stop you need to tap on my body three times. You can tap anywhere just do it firmly. Can you do that for me?"

Again you nod.

"Prove it to me, show me you can follow instructions."

You roll your eyes and he taps his hand against your chest as a small punishment. So you oblige, tapping his bicep hard three times in quick succession.

"That's perfect, angel." He squeezes tightly and then removes his hand completely.

He sits up and drags you with him so he can remove your shirt, he discards his own in the process. He kisses you once more and then slips off the bed and onto the floor. You lift your hips as he tugs at your sweats, taking your panties with them. 

He licks stripes along each of your thighs stopping an inch shy of your centre.

"Put your hands on my shoulders and squeeze when I do something you like. Don't be afraid to dig your nails in, I like it when it hurts." He winks.

And then his head disappears between your thighs.

His tongue delves deep into your folds, lapping at your hole until it's dripping. Only then does he shuffle his attention up to your clit. In the meantime, your nails bore into his shoulders leaving painful little half-moons behind to match the teeth marks on your own.

The tip of his tongue digs into the centre of your clit, he wiggles it back and forth making your toes curl into his rug. A finger soon joins his endeavour, pushing deep inside before forming come hither motions that turn you to jelly. Still, you keep your hands firmly planted on his shoulders like he said.

"You taste so good, always knew you would." He mumbles into your pussy.

The deep timber of his voice vibrates through you. Tipping you over the edge. Your head falls back and your mouth opens, whines spilling free as he continues to pleasure you through your orgasm.

He eventually pulls away as tears start to form in your eyes. He grabs a condom from his bedside table, shimmying quickly out of his slacks so he can roll the latex on. You lay back onto the bed properly as you wait for him. 

When he is ready, he slips in between your legs lining his hips up to yours. He uses one arm to balance leaning on his elbow next to your head as his free hand finds its way back to your throat, squeezing just tight enough to make you gasp.

"Do you remember what I said?" He questions.

You tap his arm three times and he releases your throat.

"That's my good girl, I knew I could get you to learn with the right incentive." He practically purrs. "I'm going to put my hand back now. The further into you I slide my dick, the tighter my hand is going to get okay?"

"Okay." You agree.

He leans in to kiss you, pushing his tongue past your lips as he rubs his hard length along your sensitive folds. The tip nudges against your clit make you cringe from the oversensitivity that still lingered. And then without much warning, he begins to slide in, his hand tightening in unison as promised. 

Your head starts to swim as he bottoms out. But the feeling doesn't scare you like maybe it should. You trust Taehyung. The pressure releases as he pulls back, his hand squeezes in time with each thrust, giving you just enough time to draw breath before he cuts you off each time.

"Your pussy squeezes so deliciously whenever I do this." He emphasises by pressing tighter on your windpipe.

You manage a strangled moan in response and his hand pulls away. You whimper at the loss but he just chuckles.

"I want to hear you now angel, we can have more fun with breath control another day." 

With both hands available to keep his balance, he thrusts harder, going deeper with each motion. He moans in your ear as he leans in closer letting you know exactly how you're making him feel. As his pace becomes more erratic he becomes more vocal.

"You make me so hard baby." He cries, hips stuttering a little. "You're so wet. Touch yourself for me."

You do as you're told, sliding a hand in between the two of you. He siver as your knuckles brush against his happy trail. You draw sloppy figures of eights around your clit, struggling to keep a steady motion as Taehyung whines, nearing his own end. 

You clamp down around him as you tip into a second orgasm, taking him over the edge with you. He rolls over to avoid putting his weight and brings you into his arms instead.

"I've waited forever for this." He sighs, kissing the top of your head.

"No, you have not." You shake your head, assuming it's just another of his exaggerations.

"Yes, I have. It's always been you... I really thought I had missed my chance a long time ago." He confessed.

You sit with the new information for a while. Taehyung seems completely content to sit there holding you, not really caring for a response but you give one anyway.

"I always thought you'd be my first you know... back when we were 14 just before we drifted apart..." You whisper, more into the air at him.

"I was just starting to give up on my crush around then.." His chuckle is humourless.

"I think this has worked out better. We've had time to become our own people." You muse.

"Yeah, maybe you're right. But now that I've had you, I have no intention of letting you go again."

He pulls you tighter into his embrace and you return the affection wrapping your ars around him too.

Notes:

This request asked for a spit kink but sadly I couldn't quite fit it in with the theme. Also, they asked for a shy Tae and apparently my brain says no, no shy Taes... Sorry

Ask Box - Please send me thirsty/funny/angsty bts thoughts

Masterlist

Summer Madness Masterlist

[mystery-star]

Waiting for you - Spock

Pairing: Spock x reader (gender neutral)

Warnings: mentions of injury and death

Words: 1838

Star Trek universe: AOS

A/N: Just a lil thing I wrote because I haven’t written (at least for Spocko) in ages. And didn’t feel like writing on a series.

-

“She’s here. She’s here” you heard someone shouting beside you and looked around and finally you could see the Enterprise approaching in one of many tunnels above you. You smiled and stepped forward a little and waited for the crew to dismount. When you saw the first of them, your smile got broader and you got onto your tiptoes to look out for your husband. Not many people of the Enterprise had someone waiting for them and those who did seemed overjoyed. It made you look down for moment because you had a feeling that Spock wouldn’t greet you like others greeted their loved ones. Finally, you could see him and slightly raised your hand, hoping he’d see you. When he did, he came straight towards you, stopping half a meter in front of you

“(Y/N)” he said “What brings you to Yorktown?”

“I’ll give you three guesses” you replied and just threw yourself around his neck “I’ve missed you, Spock” you breathed against his skin and he hugged you back slightly.

“Am I therefore right to conclude that you came here in order to see me during my shore leave?”

“Right” you let go of him but only that you could kiss him. He cupped your face and kissed you back. At some point his hand found yours, slowly stroking his first two fingers against yours. But then he pulled away from you all of a sudden, just holding your hand. You turned around and saw two older Vulcans behind you.

“Commander, might we have a word? Alone?” you wanted to ask why you couldn’t come when Spock threw a glance at you and squeezed your hand

“Do you mind?”

“Just be quick” you pecked his cheek “I’ll be waiting for you, okay?” you handed him a keycard of the hotel where you had booked a room for you both. He gave a nod, then let go of your hand and followed the two men. With a sigh you looked after him and returned to the hotel, knowing he would be clever enough to find it when he was done.

But he only came when it was dark and you were already in bed, reading a magazine on your PADD.

“Have you been waiting with sleeping until I return?”

“Well, you got some days of shore leave, then I won’t see you for another two years. I want to use every minute with you that I can” he gave a nod and sat down on the bed, placing a device on the nightstand. “What did they want?”

“I will tell you in the morning”

“Alright” you put the PADD aside and stretched yourself a little before sitting up, crawling closer to him and wrapping your arms around him again, kissing him. “We now have better things to do, don’t you think?” he kissed you back and placed one of his hands in the small of your back, pulling you closer while he ran his other hand over the side of your face. After the kiss he leaned his forehead to yours and you bumped his nose with yours. “Did you have fun out there on the mission?”

“I have written and called you three times per week, as we have agreed on, and informed you about what you call ‘adventures’ and have also answered each question concerning them I was allowed to answer”

“Well yes but your last message was two days ago. I need a recap of the past two days. Or retell me your favorite mission. Doing it face-to-face is much better” you pecked his lips. He gave a nod, pulled you into his lap and started telling you how the Captain had attempted to make peace between two species that didn’t work out as planned. Then he went on to their arrival to Yorktown and suddenly his communicator beeped “Tell me that’s your private comm”

“It is not” he leaned forward to get it and you just wanted to stop him but let it happen with a sigh. Placing you back on the bed, he gave your hand a squeeze, took the comm, opened it and left the room. With a sigh you fell back on the bed, glancing to the PADD and considering if you should continue reading but then looked at the ceiling, repeating everything you had planned to do with Spock in the following days in your mind. Soon Spock returned and you sat up with a smile but his words ruined it “I must go”

“Go? Go where? Aren’t you on shore leave?”

“I am. However, there is a matter that requires my assistance”

“What is it?”

“I cannot tell you much but I must leave Yorktown”

“You’re shitting me”

“I do not joke”

“But… but… will you at least get that time off later on? How long will you be gone?”

“I suppose it should not take longer than 36 hours”

“Oh well…. Then you owe me yet another debriefing upon your return” he gave a nod, came closer to put his comm on his nightstand and pecking your forehead.

“Please make yourself a pleasant day tomorrow”

“Okay. And then I’ll be waiting here for you… again”

-

But Spock didn’t come home the evening or morning after he had left, so you decided to make yourself another nice day exploring another area of Yorktown. In the late afternoon, you suddenly heard how the station went on alert and after looking around you saw that a swarm of tiny ships tried attacking Yorktown. Around you everyone was in panic, screaming, rallying kids and running away while you stood there frozen, staring at the many little ships on the other side of Yorktown.

“We have to leave. Come. Now” someone next to you shouted, pulling on your arm

“Can we go somewhere safe? Like a… bunker?”

“A bunker on a Starbase?” the man started laughing slightly and shook his head.

“Or can we do something? Something to help? Is there a defense station or militia? Or help evacuate people?”

“That’s Starfleet’s business” as if on cue, there was an announcement, informing the public that there was an attack and that you should not panic. You let out a snort and watched how the people around you seemed to panic even more. You looked around and finally saw a security, officer, going over to him.

“Excuse me, Sir?”

“Don’t worry, we’ll all be safe, just stay calm and…”

“No, I wanted to ask if I can help something.”

“Help?”

“Yeah. Weapons, evacuate people or something” he looked at you, considered it a while then said he’d have to check it out. But before he could return, they managed to somehow blow up all the small ships. Somehow you couldn’t believe that this was everything and sure enough, there was another announcement informing the public that a great part of the ship had been destroyed but that three of them had gotten into Yorktown but that they still had the situation under control and would do everything to stop them. For some reason, you found that three ships hand entered Yorktown almost worse than the initial attack. Because you knew there probably wasn’t much you could do unless the ships came to that part of Yorktown, you sat down in a café, ordered a drink and watched the news on the big screen that gave a permanent update on the situation at the other end of Yorktown. Not even 15 minutes later, you heard that everyone was out of danger and the intruders had been rendered harmless. After a sigh, you finished your drink and then returned to the scene of the action, maybe there now was something you could help, like tidying up damage or helping the wounded. You stayed there and helped until it was dark and the volunteers were sent home, so you returned to the hotel. But you didn’t get far and the receptionist called you over.

“You are (Y/N) (Y/L/N), right?”

“That’s me, yeah”

“I have message for you, from a doctor Leonard McCoy”

“I know him. He’s the doctor on the Enterprise. What is this message about?”

“He lets you know, that your husband… Commander Spock will spend the night in Yorktown hospital”

“Ho-hospital? They’re back? What does he have? Is it bad? Can I visit him? When did they get back?”

“He only told me that so you know where your husband is and in case you wish to see him. I don’t know anything else” you nodded and with a thank-you you ran out of the hotel, to the hospital, where you had brought a few people earlier today. You went to a visitor station to register your visit and once you knew where your husband was and that he currently could be visited, you rushed to the elevator and then to his room. When you saw Spock lying in bed awake, you let out a deep breath and moved closer.

“Spock” you breathed, not sure what to say and having a hundred questions at the tip of your tongue. "How are you?” was the first you asked

“I am well, (Y/N). The doctors insisted I stayed the night to ensure that my condition does not become worse” you nodded and came closer, taking his hand, pressing a kiss to it as you sat down on the edge of the bed. To your delight, he squeezed your hand.

“What happened? To you, I mean?” he explained how on the mission his side was impaled by a piece of metal and that McCoy didn’t have the correct equipment to properly treat him. “At least you’re safe” you ran your free hand through his hair. “When did you even get back?”

“4.2 hours ago”

“That was… that was when the attack happened” he agreed and said it was them who played a great role in stopping them. “Oh so that big ship that destroyed the central plaza was you, the Franklin?”

“Indeed”

“And what about the Enterprise?”

“She has been destroyed”

“Oh no. What about the crew? Are they safe?”

“We have not yet been able to ascertain who has survived the attack on the Enterprise and who lost their life, however, I am certain that at least 350 people have survived”

“Out of 428 that’s still a lot that could have died”

“Besides, I also know of at least 16 casualties from the crew” you gave a nod

“And what now? I mean is your mission over? The Enterprise is gone”

“We do not know yet but it is certain that we will remain her for longer than the originally scheduled 12 days of shore leave”

“Well, then we got more time to do something as long as we’re here. And I get to see you longer. Ha that visit was worth it” you leant down to kiss his forehead. “Now we just gotta make sure you’ll be on your feet as soon as possible because I have lot planned for the next days”

-

Taglist: @softsapphicideals

[judyhopps934-mt-zd]

Thoughts on Miraculous Shanghai: The Legend of Lady Dragon

Warning: Spoilers! Other than that, have fun!

Also, if you want to watch the full English Dub, click here!

I love how we saw Fei's backstory as to how she became guardian of the Prodigious and how it was actually stolen because there are people who want money from her adoptive father's studio. It was also sad to see that the values her father implemented into her fade due to the circumstances they found themselves in. I speak for all of us to say that this girl needs a hug.

The intro as always is beautiful! Since it was not the first thing we saw, I was confused when looking through the episodes on YT.

I always enjoy Marinette's monologues, and this one was over how she looked forward to her holiday (it was like a vacation type thing). And how she looked forward to spend time with Adrien since his father was going to let him out. It was all perfect...

...until she went to deliver Uncle Wang's package and found out Adrien left for Shanghai at the last minute. But all is good though because she could go to Shanghai, deliver the gift personally, and see Adrien.

It hurts me to see that the writers made Marinette's purpose to go to Shanghai is to see Adrien when she can do that in Paris! It frustrates me that her character development goes back to square one, even as the protagonist of the show. People might point out this was before season 3, but I have a few points that say otherwise or that the writers are mixing things up. But first, the plot points and thoughts of everything else.

Also, I get that Marinette is 14/15/16 at the time of this episode, but how likely is it to send your child on their own halfway across the world??? On SHORT NOTICE??? I swear Sabine and Tom are too chill with this, but then again, there would be no story.

Also, I love how Ladybug and Chat Noir took the opportunity of their patrols without akumas to bond more. The Ladynoir in this episode I stan!

Gabriel you piece of trash! If you did not plan to spend time with your son, why take him to Shanghai when he was hoping to spend time with you?! And do not say "for business purposes" because even though Adrien is a face in the brand, at least don't give him false hope and that bs!

Nooro, thank you for trying to talk Gabriel out of it, but he is literally a wall (talking to Gabriel=talking to a wall)

I will say, the waiting for 15 years thing is very concerning.

Uncle Wang has been looking forward to see Marinette in person in Shanghai to learn more about her roots. He is ecstatic and its just heartwarming and heartbreaking when you think that part of Marinette's stay will be related to Adrien.

At least we see one thing that makes Marinette's stay not all about Adrien though: she is genuinely interested in her origins! Like when she asks about her family's traditional songs and about her mom, even learning her real name!

Speaking of which, Sabine's name is Xia Ping and only called herself Sabine when she started living in France. Also, I love her photo!

Bastille the bird that was around since forever is an icon!

Also, I can't believe Uncle Wang has not taken a break since Sabine moved to France, like what the hell??? Give this guy a break for goodness sake.

Thank you Gabriel for having one brain cell and allowing your son to leave the hotel! We still hate you for everything else though.

Its cool that Kwamis speak all of the languages. It is also the most logical thing because their wielder could be from anywhere. My question is are they taught the languages, does it form when a concept forms in the universe and they start existing, or like everything else is it magic?

Gorilla is iconic for two reasons: he is still a self care king, and he was willing to give Adrien some space to get action figures.

And now as I wrote that, this is where I am getting confused and start to believe this is post season 3: 1) Gorilla seems less anxious about being in a new place (unlike NY where he stayed in the hotel room the entire time), and 2) His obsession for action figures was shown in Party Crasher (season 3), which makes me wonder if the explanation is during season 3 or this episode hints at season 3. For the first point, it could be because Gabriel was not in NY to his knowledge.

Fei appears again and explains how she views the world and how she also uses that to help and take advantage of others.

She almost steals Adrien's phone and miraculous until Gorilla steps in. It hurts me because she is a good person but had to resort to stealing for a reason that we will explore soon.

Plagg, we always say your stomach causes trouble, but this time, you brought Adrien to Marinette's uncle...

...but also that ironically separated them as Marinette found them just as they climbed into the taxi.

This is also where Fei (wearing a disguise) crosses paths with Marinette and steals her purse. Then she went for the kwagatama and miraculous.

Things get worse for Fei as these boys that took a photo with Adrien earlier started chasing her. Then Marinette started going after them.

That is when she realized she was robbed and understandably, she was more horrified of losing her Miraculous.

Adrien shows up to Uncle Wang's home/restaurant. So many iconic moments happen.

1) Bastille says something about love between Marinette and Adrien. And Adrien responds with the line that makes us want to jump into the TV and talk some sense into him.

2) You say that "she's JuST a fRIenD" yet you stay over with her mom's uncle so you can surprise her lol. Adrien, you kill me and every other Adrienette fan with this contradicting statements.

Speaking of Marinette, she gets lost and has trouble communicating with others because she does not speak Chinese. And at some point says that she regrets not taking lessons?! Uh, what does this imply, that she refused lessons or that she did not have the opportunity for lessons??????? I NEED ANSWERS!

Can we say once again how talented and artistic Marinette is? Bad time? Moving on!

Uncle Wang is unaware of Marinette's tardiness, and Adrien just jokes about it. Considering that she is technically missing (reality is that she's lost), I don't think its time to joke about it.

The lady that gave Marinette some earrings that look like the Miraculous is so nice and bless her soul

The person from the pawn shop is the bad guy that we see at the very end of the NY special! And he knows about what happened to Fei's father! I am grateful that he sees no value in Marinette's stuff so he won't sell it for a lot, but I hate how he's greedy for money and was willing to exploit Fei's hunger for answers and Marinette needing her miraculous for personal gains.

Meanwhile, the boys from the photo with Adrien that chased Fei were trying to get Marinette's attention (they found her kwagatama when Fei dropped it running away and fighting them), but she thought they were gonna attack her. And then she bumps into Fei, who helps her escape.

Marinette finds comfort in Fei for being willing to "help" her (remember that she was gonna bring her to the pawn shop). She also finds Fei as a helpful, kind person who is brave: something that Fei does not see in herself, but does not have the heart to tell Marinette the truth.

Meanwhile, Chat has transformed to find Marinette and its the most endearing thing I've seen! Adrien, you blind oblivious fool! You care about her more than you think!

They arrive in the pawn shop, Tikki escaped the claw machine, and Marinette finds the earrings...for 100000 Yuan.

Fei, understanding what its like to have something entrusted to you be stolen, gets in a spat with the pawn shop owner in Chinese, accusing the owner for greed and accusing Fei for theft, while Marinette just stands her.

Also, when did Marinette become naive???????? I get that she's in another country and they are speaking in a different language that she does not understand, but based on the tone of their voices and shouting, I feel like she should have sensed something was off.

Fei swaps the earrings the lady gave Marinette and took the miraculous back. To the lady, this is why your soul is blessed. So bless your soul!!!

Apparently, Marinette realized what happened and said that Fei stole her earrings and feels bad for the man. Girl, you do not have to feel guilty for the man! He was about to destroy them before he thought about sentimental value! Also, he did not pay Fei anything for them! (Felt that this should be brought up because even though Fei was wrong in stealing her stuff, she was also robbed from potential cash and answers, therefore the man was owed nothing.)

The boys from Adrien's photo are actually vigilantes of Shanghai (and will be referred as such from now on), wanting to bring Fei to justice for stealing, which catches Marinette's attention, but not enough to ask any questions.

Also Marinette is not wanted as a criminal. She is missing as Uncle Wang called the police.

Fei still lives in the school, which has been in ruins. Despite not having much, she still offers Marinette a cup of what I believe is water (or tea?). See peoples, Fei is a good person at heart (if y'all aren't aware of it by now)

Gabriel saw and recognized Marinette. This is horrifying and if it is prior to season 3, we see why he tries so hard to target her. Or reasons why he targets her in season 4 along with everything else we know from "Truth".

Fei should have been given the chance to explain why she stole Marinette's things, but the pawn shop owner was like "you know, I might as well expose Fei myself"...

...and it really broke Marinette, who heavily trusted her. But she can't dwell on it for long...

...because AKUMA COMES FOR THE PAWN SHOP OWNER! AND HIS FAN SHOOTS KNIVES! AND HAS GREEDY MOTIVES! AND HELPED HAWKMOTH GET INTI THE CAVE WITH THE PRODIGIOUS!!!

Also, Nathalie was involved in obtaining the bracelet years ago. Again, the 15 years thing is concerning.

Marinette flees to transform, but not without telling Fei how she broke her trust and how she feels that Feinwas not genuinely helping her. It hurt me so much!

Ladybug transforms, hears Chat's voice-mail (to which she is swooned by the fact her kitty cares for her civilian self), and calls him. The best Ladynoir scene so far!

So the prodigious is like a jewel with powers, there is only one prodigious from what we see, and that one prodigious has multiple renlings that only the wielder can see. Oh, and the bracelet is like a key. Cool.

I don't like how Fei's Lady Dragon outfit looks whitewashed, but at least her hair is red instead of blonde (which still does not make this okay)

Epic Showdown between the akuma, Hawkmoth, Ladybug, and Lady Dragon. Hawkmoth corners Ladybug and Lady Dragon gets caught in some rocks.. All hope seemed lost...

...until Chat shows up and frees the akuma with the help of a basketball.

We learn something new folks: the same butterfly can create a different akuma. This is very frightening because...

The statue that determines who is worthy of the prodigious gets akumatized! The horror!

Also, if the statue says Fei cannot become the dragon because her intention to seek vengeance for her father is not noble and worthy, then what makes Hawkmoth think he will be successful in becoming the dragon??? Because it seems that his intentions are not pure or noble. Just saying.

Hawkmoth notices the akumatized statue heading to the city and all of a sudden remembers about Adrien. Confronting the statue, he gets turned into ashes(?).

CHAT, HAWKMOTH IN ASHES WOULD HAVE BEEN FOR THE BETTER IF THE STATUE DID NOT DESTROY SHANGHAI AND YOU WOULD NOT THINK AS SUCH IF YOU KNEW HE WAS YOUR FATHER! But I am not mad at you, just wanted to point out your irony.

ML WRITERS, WHY DO YOU KEEP KILLING OFF CHAT????? LADYBUG DOES NOT NEED ANY MORE TRAUMA AND THAT WAS COMPLETELY UNNECESSARY!!!! I AM SCREAMING INSIDE!!!!!

Fei is understandably upset and blames herself for what happen. I want to hug her so badly.

Marinette reassures Fei and forgives her, even though Fei felt that she could not be forgiven.

The structure they were standing on collapses and it was Fei as the Dragon who saved her, not Chat. Honestly, I love how it turned out as it strengthens their friendship, but I still prefer a Marichat alternative. WHERE IS THE MARICHAT PEOPLES???

Final showdown!

Poor statue guard was upset about the damage they caused as an akuma, but Miraculous Ladybiug fixes everything.

Fei learned an important lesson: let justice take its course, not enact revenge. But it was quite funny to have the pawn shop owner be flown away to court in a literal sense.

The bracelet has a renling-like creature, who is just so adorable, especially since they missed Fei and was waiting for the day they would be reunited. Aww!

Ladynoir version of the Moon scene from NYC! Except no dancing, just them challenging each other over who will get to Paris first if they traveled in opposite directions. No one shall ever know we were in Shanghai as civilians lol (Reminds me of my best friend when eating grapes during choral rehearsals)

Marinette, Adrien, Fei, and Uncle Wang enjoying a birthday (?) dinner was wholesome.

I love how Uncle Wang calls them boyfriend and girlfriend because of how they act around each other, yet Marinette and Adrien both deny it. Bruh, these children need to open their fricking eyes! I really wanted to jump through my phone screen!

The Shanghai Vigilantes came to return Marinette's kwagatama necklace. They are so precious even though we thought they were enemies in the trailer.

Even though they were at odds at first, love how the Vigilantes blushed when Fei played the accordion and she's just like "whatever". I stan an asexual queen.

Do I even want to know what Marinette accidentally said when she mispronounced "sister" in Chinese? Based on what Fei said, probably not.

Uh...NOW I WANT TO SEE MORE OF ADRIEN TEACHING MARINETTE CHINESE! While I do take some issue of Adrien (a white French boy) teaching Marinette her culture like most of us had issue with in "Kung Food", I also want to see them interact outside of school and hopefully bond. ML writers need to keep their word otherwise Adrienette stans will riot!

Love how the final scene turned out! Its just *chef's kisses*

Also, the hell with the business trip?? It was mentioned once again IN THE ENDCARD! It might not be as interesting, but I want to think that there was more truth to it.

Also, wifi troubles kept interrupting the show at crucial moments, but okay.

Overall, I live for the Shanghai episode! The animation is just as incredible as the NY special (which I also live for) and I love how this episode has a great focus on Fei and the prodigious. I mean, before the intro, she tells her story. And she has her monologues alongside Marinette's. In many ways, it's refreshing. Also, Ladynoir and Adrienette stans will be satiated with the scenes associated with each ship. Also, I love Fei's character development! And the final scene is wholesome!

I won't lie though: there are a few issues regarding whitewashing Fei's transformation and such. It is important to see these things and as a good friend of mine always says: you can enjoy something while also being critical of it. And that is very important no matter how devotive to something you actually are.

Anyways, we are being well fed with all the Miraculous content and I will see you all very soon! Also, get some sleep peoples! I know some of you aren't sleeping!

[maddogofshimano]

Miss Tatsu Character Story

This one was voted on by the good people of Fats Clan, so here’s everyone’s favorite trainer!

Summary: Miss Tatsu is still doing the rounds on debt collection when Ichiban happens to see her in action. He tags along to help as she handles a few more cases and muses on who the worst people are.

We open with a goon harassing Miss Tatsu.

She tells them to get lost, she doesn’t have time for this, but they’re very persistent. Ichiban sees this happening and thinks that these assholes have way too much free time on their hands to harass women. (Since Ichiban is here, this must be in 2018)

Miss Tatsu just beats the guy over the head though, so it’s fine (I really hate the face the goon is making).

His lackey jumps in to defend his aniki, but he’s not sure if he should get rough... She says that that’s enough out of him, and beats him over the head too. 

Ichiban loves to see it. He comments that it looked like it hurt, and that lady really handed it to them. The now beaten goons run off. Miss Tatsu is glad that’s dealt with, and Ichiban approaches to tell her that was really cool how she kicked the hell out of those guys all on her own.

Miss Tatsu thinks Ichiban is also trying to hit on her, and tells him that he already saw what happens if he tries it. He says that he’s not trying to hit on her, he just didn’t know young ladies were so strong these days. 

Miss Tatsu says she is not young. In fact, she’s probably older than Ichiban. (She’s correct!) Ichiban is surprised, it didn’t seem like she was that old at all. The goons return, this time with another, larger goon.

Miss Tatsu’s a little miffed that no one recognizes her. It doesn’t matter, this guy bringing his crew saves her the time and effort of tracking them down. Turns out she was coming to collect on the big guy today.

Miss Tatsu: It’s obvious. If you have the money to go play around with, you have the money to pay your loan back. It’s my job to keep collecting until you’ve paid it off in full.  Goon: J-Just try it. This doesn’t concern you Miss Tatsu! Don’t think that I’m going to lose to a woman! Ichiban: Woah woah, this lady is really strong, but isn’t it cowardly to fight her two on one? Miss Tatsu: This doesn’t concern you. I can handle this on my own no problem. Ichiban: I don’t doubt it. I’m just all worked up for a fight. I’m cutting in to throw some fists. Miss Tatsu: Heh... You’re a rare kind of man these days. Sure, be my guest. I’ll borrow those fists.

<They fight the goons and obliterate them>

Miss Tatsu wants the money now, assuming he hasn’t blown it all already. He hands it over and begs for forgiveness. She complains, this is only half of what he owes. She’s going to come by later for the other half, so he better not try to run off. With that handled, she comments to Ichiban that it was a fun battle, yeah?

Ichiban is impressed with her level of violence. He finally introduces himself and asks if he should call her Miss Tatsu. She says yeah, that’s not a problem. He confirms that she’s a debt collector, based on what he just saw. She says yep, and she has been for a long time now.

He says he’s a little surprised about that, given her looks. She says that’s nice of him to say, but she’s been doing this job for decades now. Ichiban thinks “Decades...? Just how old is this lady?” Ichiban: Is the job dangerous? It seems like there could be a lot of assholes to deal with.  Miss Tatsu: That’s true. There’s a lot of trash out there that borrow money they can’t pay back. That bastard just now is a perfect example, he’d have more than enough money to pay everything back if he didn’t keep blowing it on gambling and women. Miss Tatsu: Even worse, he had a wife who was completely in the dark. That’s the kind of thing I hate most of all. Miss Tatsu: ...Say, you’ve got a pretty good punch, what do you say you work as my assistant for a bit and help me out? Ichiban: Well I gotta say I’m interested in that job, unfortunately I’m a little busy right now. Miss Tatsu: Aww, that’s too bad. Well, till we meet again then. See ya. <She leaves> Ichiban: (Miss Tatsu the debt collector, huh...)

<Part 2>

They happen to bump into each other again. Ichiban asks if she’s out collecting again.

She is, she was just about to head over right now. If he’s got time, maybe he’d want to tag along? Ichiban is glad to, he is still interested in seeing Miss Tatsu in action. They head off and find their target. It’s a homeless guy begging for food.

Ichiban: ...Hold on. There’s no way that guy could have any money, right? Miss Tatsu: Is that what you’re seeing? Well I guess you are still an amateur.  Ichiban: I guess she’s the pro here. ...Still, I don’t like this.  Homeless man: Oh... are you going to give me food- Ah! M-Miss Tatsu! Miss Tatsu: You might be acting like you’re broke, but I see right through that. Now pay your debt! Homeless man: Wh-... I really am broke! I haven’t had anything to eat today! Onlookers: Hold on... Is that lady heartless? Demanding loan payments from a homeless person... Onlookers: Debt collectors are really... the lowest of the low. Still collecting from a person like that.

Ichiban tries to intercede and stop Miss Tatsu. She says that she knows this guy has money, and rips the jacket off of him. He’s wearing a full suit underneath! Ichiban doesn’t understand.

Miss Tatsu explains that this guy had actually been homeless once, but he borrowed money and created a very successful business. He had a large income and a comfortable life, but his obsession with money kept growing. He was terrified of ever losing money, or even spending any that he had, so he started dressing like that to beg for money in the streets and reduce his spending as much as possible.

Also, he’s started referring the local homeless to an abusive temporary staffing agency just to collect the referral bonus. Ichiban says that he’s a real villain, and that he’d have a little more sympathy if the guy at least made all the money honestly.

The man snaps back, saying that neither of them know what they’re talking about! They don’t understand how scary it is to not have any money!

Miss Tatsu says that she’s not trying to take all of his fortune. If he doesn’t pay back the money he borrowed, it’s the lenders who will be in trouble. He tells her to shut up, he’s never going to give up any of his money! The goons from before show up. They want revenge on Miss Tatsu, and it turns out they’re the ones running that abusive temp agency that this guy has been referring people to! 

<They fight, and Miss Tatsu and Ichiban kick their asses>

Miss Tatsu once again demands the cash. He says that well, he doesn’t have anything on him right now... Miss Tatsu says that’s fine, for now he can just hand over everything he’s wearing. That’ll be enough to excuse today. 

He does so, stripping right in the middle of the street. Miss Tatsu says great, she’ll be back for the rest later. He better have actual money next time. He says he will, for sure, and runs off.

Miss Tatsu says that that got a little crazy, huh. Ichiban says that was fine, and even if it was, Miss Tatsu was really cool. 

“Cool? Why would you think that?”

Ichiban explains that it’s just what he feels. Being a debt collector is a job that gets a lot of people hating you. A long time ago he used to collect debts too, but he really hated doing it because of that. 

Miss Tatsu says that yeah, debt collecting has a real bad reputation. But, as long as people lend money in this town, there’s going to be people who abuse it. She can’t stand scumbags like that, so it’s satisfying to stop them. 

Ichiban says he thinks that’s what makes her cool, that she takes on a negative job like that but manages to find satisfaction in it. She says she can accept that compliment then. Since today’s job is over, she heads off. 

“(...She’s got some serious balls.)”

<Part 3>

They’ve run into each other again. Ichiban asks what’s up? She looks tense. 

She says he’s right. She’s going to collect from this guy who she can’t let get away from her. She’s psyching herself up for it. Ichiban offers to help, Miss Tatsu accepts gladly.

He asks what’s special about this target. She asks if he’s heard of people who carry multiple debts. He says yeah, those guys who borrow from a bunch of places, right? Exactly, Ichiban’s pretty knowledgeable on this stuff. This scumbag is a real piece of work, he made his younger brother sign as the guarantor and then ran off, leaving the younger brother to pay for it all.

Ichiban: That is dirty. Though, does that mean you should be collecting from the guy’s younger brother? Miss Tatsu: That’s not an option. The younger brother filed for bankruptcy.  Ichiban: ...Huh, that seems like it’s resolved.  Miss Tatsu: The younger brother is the victim here. Ichiban: A victim...? How do you mean? Miss Tatsu: He only signed because of his relationship with his brother... but his brother was a multiple debtor and had no way to afford paying the debt.   Miss Tatsu: Even more, some of the debt was delinquent enough that the courts were starting to notify him. Ichiban: Ah... Miss Tatsu: The younger brother couldn’t get in contact at all, his brother had already fled abroad. Miss Tatsu: Therefore the younger brother went bankrupt because of the debt left by his older brother, who had no intention of ever paying it.  Ichiban: Being betrayed by your family, huh... Miss Tatsu: Mhm. And with the guarantor bankrupt, there’s no choice but to collect from the debtor himself.  Miss Tatsu: Besides, I think the older brother should have to deal with the consequences of his actions. Miss Tatsu: So I’m going to go collect every penny this guy owes. Ichiban: But, does that mean you’re flying overseas for this? Miss Tatsu: About that... He’s returned home, to Kamurocho. Ichiban: So that’s what you meant about not letting him flee, because he’s finally returned to Japan? Miss Tatsu: Right, it seems like he’s here to visit his favorite hostess in all of Japan. Miss Tatsu: With that information, I’ll be able to grab him before he goes home while he’s off playing with that woman. Miss Tatsu: So you see why I can’t miss this opportunity? I’ll definitely collect on this guy, for sake of his younger brother.  Ichiban: Then I humbly offer my services. <They go to the club>

The target is there and ordering up Gold Champagne.

Miss Tatsu: Seems like you’re well to do. Why don’t you get me a drink. Man: Hm? Lady, I don’t think I requested you? But, you’re pretty so it’s totally okay!

Man: Come, sit~. Why don’t you tell this old man what you want? (Tl note: I don’t want to translate it as daddy but that might be... more accurate) Miss Tatsu: Alright then... How about you paying all of the debts you’ve racked up. Man: Wh-what..? Miss Tatsu: You’re Takeshi, aren’t you? The piece of shit that pushed all his debts off onto his family. Miss Tatsu: I’m here to collect. Takeshi: Uh, I don’t know what you’re talking about! Miss Tatsu: Oh yeah, you got amnesia? Well then, how about I refresh your memory! Miss Tatsu: Here’s the loan book of all the money you borrowed. Are you saying you don’t know what this is? Takeshi: Uh... I-I don’t know what it is! You’re... trying to scam me! Miss Tatsu: You’re the one running a scam!!! You outta know when to give up!! Takeshi: Wahhh!? Ichiban: Oooh, she snapped that table in half. That’s scary. Takeshi: M-My younger brother, collect from him! I don’t have any money left to pay back! Miss Tatsu: You brother went bankrupt. This debt is all on you. Takeshi: Wh-... shit! Hey, you all! Tag in here!

Some new goons step in to help. They think this is an interesting sight.

Takeshi tells them to shut up and help him already. He’ll pay however much they want! Miss Tatsu wonders why he would hire bodyguards if he’s so broke, and says that dirty guys like him are all the same. Takeshi says he’s not returning the money, and tells his posse to do whatever they like to this woman. He’ll give them a bonus for it afterwards!

<They fight, Miss Tatsu remains undefeated>

Miss Tatsu has dragged the man out of the club. He bemoans that this is happening to him, and blames his brother, if he hadn’t filed for bankruptcy then...

Miss Tatsu yells that he’s the one causing troubles for his relatives! He’s so damn irresponsible! Takeshi says that if the person taking the loan can’t pay it, then the guarantor is supposed to pay it instead! 

Miss Tatsu: I’m not one to force stuff, but you listen to me. I know you don’t have any way to pay off this debt right now. Miss Tatsu: Since that’s the case, your only option is to go work on a tuna boat until it’s paid off. Takeshi: W-What! I can’t...!! Miss Tatsu: What kind of man are you? Take some responsibility! Man: Miss, it’s okay. Miss Tatsu: Who are you? ...Ah, you’re Yoshikazu, aren’t you. What’s wrong? Yoshikazu: I heard from a friend that my brother was hanging around the cabaret clubs here.  Ichiban: Oh, I get it... this is his younger brother. Yoshikazu: Here... It’s not a lot, but I think it should cover the interest.

Miss Tatsu: Yoshikazu... Why are you doing this?  Takeshi: What... Why do you have money, even after bankruptcy!? Yoshikazu: You’ve got it wrong, brother. This is money from our father. Takeshi: Our.. parents...? Miss Tatsu: Yoshikazu, even still, I can’t take this money from you. You’re no longer obligated to repay these debts. Yoshikazu: No, this is a family problem. Please, I want you to take it. Yoshikazu: My brother really is a decent person. I’m sure he’ll get all the money back to you. Yoshikazu: Unless you’d rather work on the tuna boat? Takeshi: N-No... I’ll work hard! I’ll work until I can return all the money! Ichiban: Hey, he could be lying. Is it alright to trust him? Miss Tatsu: ...Yoshikazu says so. It’s not my place to say otherwise.  Yoshikazu: Thank you, Miss.  Yoshikazu: I’m going to have a lot of meetings with him to work on how best to pay back everything he owes.  Yoshikazu: Miss Tatsu... You’re a debt collector of justice. Miss Tatsu: ...Justice is stretching it. Yoshikazu: Not at all, that’s what I really think. ...Well, let’s go, brother. Takeshi: Yeah... I’m, really sorry... <They leave> Ichiban: ...Well, do you think this case is settled? Miss Tatsu: We’ll see. Did Takeshi really turn over a new leaf... I’ll have to wait and see. Miss Tatsu: Well, if he pulls something, I won’t forgive him again.  Ichiban: Haha, that’s terrifying. But I wouldn’t expect anything less from you, Miss Tatsu. Ichiban: That Yoshikazu guy sure looked relieved though.  Miss Tatsu: ...Yeah, he did. That’s a first when I’m working a case. Miss Tatsu: People are thankful for the moneylenders, but no one’s been thankful for the debt collectors.  Miss Tatsu: ...Heh. Maybe debt collectors aren’t as bad as people think. <END>

Bonus facts: Miss Tatsu usually uses アタシ (atashi) which is a very feminine personal pronoun. The one exception is when she’s asking why Ichiban thinks she’s cool and she uses 私 (watashi), which is a polite pronoun that leans slightly feminine. 

I wasn’t really able to find a clear explanation, but Miss Tatsu ended a few sentences with かい, and I’m not sure if that’s a dialect or slang or a character quirk. They usually write things phonetically including slang, for example Ichiban says カッコイイ as かっけー and お前 as おめえ to match the lazy slur of the words, so it can be tricky to translate. 

[ironmandeficiency]

falcon, falcon, goose!

pairing: sam wilson / reader

word count: 3547

summary: there were reports of geese leading people to their soulmates spanning centuries, and it seemed like a cool concept, but why did it have to coincide with you coming out of your writing slump?

warnings: cursing, geese, dumbassery, implied happy au where the avengers get along, iw and endgame who?

a/n: this is an older piece i wrote a couple years ago, decided to brush it up and repost it. and the reader works for snl bc why the hell not? keep in mind that the original was written before everything went to shit w iw & endgame. posted from mobile yet again yall what is wrong w me

it was a sunny day outside, and deciding that you had been cooped up for far too long, you brought your laptop to the park a couple blocks from your studio apartment.

being a writer for saturday night live wasn't always so peachy, what with the lack of a social life outside of your co-workers and constantly explaining your job to confused relatives. you had been in a slump for the past couple weeks, the fact most of your sketch ideas not making the cut for the next episode continuing to throw you off your rhythm.

this week, you were going to change that. Your headphones were playing your concentration playlist full volume and you were hyped to the max. with your laptop on the picnic table in front of you and a warm cup of tea beside it, you were ready to blow the producers away with your next idea.

"honk! honk!"

you felt something nudge your leg, but you were too engrossed into what you were typing to care. after getting through a few more lines, it happened again.

"honk! honk! honk!"

you couldn't hear the sound but the feeling on your leg got a little bit rougher, more demanding. you moved your headphones to the side for a minute and took a moment to look around you. there was no kid running to get their ball back or any squirrels nearby that dropped a nut.

strange.

but you put your headphones back on, trying to keep your groove alive while hoping the interruptions are finished.

"HONK! HONK! HONK!" the goose honked louder, pecking at your leg harder than it had earlier.

you were getting frustrated and a little pissed. the creativity was flowing through your veins for the first time in what felt like ages and this — whatever it was — decided that today was the best day to annoy you.

you kicked your legs out with a strange flail and when you came into contact with something large and solid you nearly screamed.

"ow! motherf- oh my god!"

standing on the ground beside your table was a goose. it honked yet again with impatience (geese could do that?) and nipped lightly at your thigh closest to it. looking to the pond nearby, it was nearly an entire gaggle of the damned things.

so here was this goose honking at you and nipping at you like you were supposed to know what the hell it wanted from you.

"i don't have any bread, dumbass. go find someone else to bother." thinking it would leave if you ignored it, you turned away and continued your work.

"HONK! HONK!" it continued to honk and decided to peck you before flapping its wings, landing itself on the table next to your computer.

"get outta here, ya damn goose!" while you were trying to shop it away, it expertly evaded you. "go! shoo! leave me alone!"

it just stayed over on the bench, expertly dodging your attempts to get it to leave.

a few people nearby had heard your altercation with the infernal bird. one of them was an older gentleman that laughed as he sat across from you, the mirth in his eyes glinting as you give him a sarcastic side eye while trying to deal with the current issue.

"that bird won't leave you alone, you know." At his voice, the goose calmed down and waddled a few feet away from your arm's reach.

that was the first time the thing had been seemingly calm since he showed up at your little table.

"what do you mean he won't leave me alone?"

he pauses, part of him enjoying the irritation in your tone. he remembers someone talking to him like he was to you many years ago, and it made his heart smile at the idea of repaying the favor. "have you ever read about soulmate geese?"

"hey we're gonna go for a run, wanna join?" steve’s offer was given with a smirk. ever since reuniting with bucky, the two supersoldiers found so much humor in doing laps around sam every time they went out jogging.

it annoyed the shit out of him, the "on your left" comments from steve and the newer "on your right" jabs from bucky, but it also pushed Sam to work harder during his runs. ultimately he knew his non-enhanced body didn't stand much of a chance beating them, but he enjoyed when he was able to close the gap between their times just a little bit.

"sure, just gimme a few to eat breakfast and I'll join you guys." the blond nodded and turned back to the elevator, having woken up far earlier than sam and therefore already ate.

he hummed otis redding as he laid the bacon flat into the pan, shoulders moving along with his created rhythm while changing the grounds in the coffee filter. this was how he spent most of his mornings, barring the occasional hangovers and missions where he couldn't afford the distraction.

he ate, got dressed, and told FRIDAY to let bucky and steve know he was ready to go. h had his water bottle in hand, giving his body a pep talk in preparation for the run. they met in the common room and soon, the trio was off.

"on your left!"

"on your right!"

"oh, come on!"

he knew it was gonna happen, but for some reason it felt like it happened sooner than normal. either they were trying really hard to mess with him today, or he was off his game. but regardless, he pushed his body harder than he probably should have because when there was something obstructing his path, he didn't pause. no, he charged it straight on through and fell hard.

steve and bucky had seen this from a distance and immediately rushed to get to their friend.

sam rolled onto his back, exhausted and now in terrible pain from the fall. he closed his eyes and just let it all sink in. when he opened his eyes at the sudden foul smell flooding his nostrils, he could feel the palpitations, thinking he was about to have a heart attack.

"holy shit!" sam sat up like a rocket despite the way his body was throbbing from the fall.

the goose stared at him curiously and turned its head toward the pounding footsteps from the approaching brooklynites.

"sam! What happened?" steve was concerned, inspecting sam while bucky noticed the bird. The brunet bent down to meet the goose eye-level and was somewhat surprised that it didn't run away at the close proximity.

"did you trip the dumbass? was it your fault sam landed on his face? Huh, little guy?"

"honk! honk!"

"i thought so. good job, man." bucky pats the animal on the head gently before turning to help steve get sam off the ground.

"nothing’s broken but there's probably a sprain, can't really be sure until we get to cho." sam and bucky lift their friend from the pavement and they have no problem supporting his weight.

they began the walk back to the tower in silence. well, almost silence. there was a faint pitter-patter of tiny, webbed feet behind them that sam and bucky weren't paying attention to.

steve noticed the goose slowly waddling behind the trio and looked at sam with a smile. sam responded to steve’s happy face with a glare, not enjoying any of the situation he found himself in.

"look behind us, guys."

both men took turns looking behind them and see the goose waddling behind them patiently. sam wasn't particularly happy about the culprit from moments before trailing behind him, but bucky thought it was hilarious.

"do you know what this means?"

sam rolled his eyes because he thought the blond was about to make some sort of poetic comment about one thing for another.

bucky had paused to think about the implications of a random goose for a moment before gasping. "dude," bucky nudged sam softly, being conscious of his friend's injuries. "you’re gonna meet your soulmate, man!"

"a soulmate goose. man come on, are you out of your mind?"

"steve got his goose back during the war, i think we know enough about it."

sam had only heard vague reports of soulmate geese throughout his life, but now that he thought about it, it did make sense. the goose showed up randomly in the middle of his routine, completely throwing him off, and was now refusing to leave him alone.

"well if this is my soulmate goose, then somebody’s gotta tell tony about our newest avenger." they laughed at the implication, viciously eager to witness tony’s reaction to the newest resident of avengers hq.

it has been three days of dealing with your goose, and you were now teased at work as “bird brain”, walking into your office to see several loaves of bread covering the desk. your goose, that you had named piper once you got home, was excited at the prospect of more food, but you planned on donating most of the bread to local shelters, only keeping a couple loaves for the house.

the guest host that week was mick jagger, and he had emerged into the room “i dream of jeanie” style, startling both you and piper, who honked at him in irritation.

it was time for you to work on the song for your little sketch with him, and you had only two more days before performance night (it was thursday) to finish writing it. after settling down and getting into the right mindset, the writing process had begun.

"alright let's see," mick murmured. "let’s all go to the picnic, let's all have a drink. what rhymes with 'drink'?"

you thought for a moment and said quietly, "think?"

you weren't prepared for the absurd response you received from the man, his accent making him round mean as he barked out a loud "NO!" with an unnecessary hand gesture.

piper just about lost it. she was honking and flapping around your office in a tizzy (but staying away from mick because the man was seen as a stranger she wasn't comfortable with).

you racked your brain for another solution, something else to rhyme with 'drink' and you eventually found it: "sink?"

mick thought about it for a moment before replying with a much lighter "yes!" also paired with unwarranted pointing.

‘motherfucker, is this how you write songs?!'

thursday and friday came and went, and soon it was time for your piece to be performed by mick. du to an accidental ankle twist someone else suffered, you were forced to perform a skit live for the first time in your career. it would have been great, but there was one teensy problem: piper blatantly refused to leave your side when it was time to perform, and she would honk and bite anyone that tried to keep her from you onstage.

even poor bobby, who she had grown fond of, was taking the brunt of it. she was not allowing you to be more than a couple feet away from her, and it was almost endearing if you weren't being broadcast on national television.

apparently, piper would also be making her debut appearance on saturday night live tonight as well.

saturday had arrived, and it was sam’s day of rest. he spent the day doing the bare minimum, eating junk food and watching almost everything on netflix he could find.

he didn't stray too far from tradition, not really. it was just that now he had a goose accompanying him the entire time, honking at this and that and eating occasional pieces of popcorn that sam didn't want to share.

he didn't mind his feathered companion, he was actually quite fond of his goose at this point. whitewing (not to be confused with redwing) was the most calm goose any of them had seen, no biting or nipping and especially no honking at ungodly hours of the night.

steve was perplexed. "Are you sure whitewing hasn't done anything bad? no waking you up at night or bites when you don't feed him soon enough?"

sam would chuckle and shake his head, proud to have such a calm goose. "why are you so keen to see him misbehave? aren’t all soulmate geese like this?"

"for lack of a better word, most geese are assholes. i don't know how whitewing is so well behaved," steve balked at the very idea of all geese being so mellow and decided it was story time.

steve’s goose from the century before was the most rambunctious animal anyone had ever seen. he recounted the first and several occasions following where his soulmate goose, jimmy, fended off the blond man's alleyway attackers.

sam was extremely grateful that whitewing had less feral and goose-like tendencies. whitewing was extremely well behaved and had an almost human way about him, the way he honked in reply to sam or the rest of the team when they talked to him.

it was late in the evening when clint decided to plop down onto the couch and flick the channel to nbc, where tonight's host was mick jagger.

"why are we watching this?" sam was enjoying his sitcoms before the other bird man had showed up.

"i haven't watched it in ages, plus mick jagger is on tonight."

"alright, whatever you want."

the intro played like usual, and whitewing was perfectly complacent. they laughed in the right places with the occasional honking from the bird, and everything was great.

"hey man, look!" clint interrupted, keeping sam from being able to hear the punchline. "i think that's a goose!"

"why is there a goose? The skit has nothing to with-"

sam and clint seemed to come to the same realization at the same time as whitewing, the goose beginning to honk incessantly. he was going absolutely berserk, flapping his wings and hopping off of sam’s lap and onto the coffee table, occasionally pecking at the tv where he saw the other goose.

he was going absolutely bonkers.

"whitewing! whitewing, no! calm down!" sam scrambled to calm down his goose, but he was having none of it. the whole entire skit, whitewing was honking and flapping and being a general nuisance.

he found his soulmate.

whitewing kept at it until the screen went to a commercial, his soulmate off of the screen.

"y’know," clint spoke around a slice of pizza. when did he get pizza? "if you hurry, you could go to the studio and meet your soulmate. the show is about halfway over."

before sam could think over the proposition, tony’s voice was heard from the corridor. "somebody shut that damned bird up before I pay ramsay to cook it!"

"i’m taking care of it!"

with that, sam heads to the armory with whitewing on his tail to get his wings. once he's equipped, sam heads to the window and jumps, immediately setting his course for studio 8h and his soulmate.

you’re released to go back to your office once you finish the skit alongside mick and piper, the show almost over. you’re gathering your things lazily, knowing that you have no other responsibilities for the night.

just as you lock your office and piper is waddling beside you without a care in the world, you see kyle running towards you with a look of fear in his eyes. that fear seems to only triple when his eyes land on piper beside you.

"kyle! what’s-"

"there’s another goose on the set! no one is safe!"

wait, was he bleeding?!

you were going to try and help your friend but one look at piper sent him off the rails, the lanky man nearly falling on his ass in an attempt to skid the corner. you hoped that someone would help calm your panicked friend, seeing as you were literally the worst person for the job at the moment.

without further incident, you are able to say goodbye to cecily and mikey before you're stopped in your tracks by michael, who gives piper a funny look.

"wait, so the goose that attacked kyle wasn't piper?" You shake your head in confusion. "dude, your soulmate must have come to the set!"

piper must have either understood what your co-worker had said or she could sense a change in the studio, but she began to honk erratically and run away from you. the last thing new york needed was two feral geese running around attacking people, so you did what anyone would do and ran after her.

"piper! piper, come back!" michael laughed as you chased after your goose. while you were running, you nearly died when you heard a honk that you knew wasn't from your piper. hers were carved into your brain, and you were positive that you could pick hers out of an entire gaggle of geese, so there was indeed a second goose in the studio.

to your dismay, piper did not stop and wait, she just kept on honking and flapping and scaring people in pursuit of the other goose, poor old you having to chase her.

there was another voice you assumed was yelling at his goose since you didn't know of anyone naming their kid whitewing. your eyes were not looking straight ahead when you suddenly bumped into someone, immediately stumbling a bit before regaining your balance.

piper had stopped her honking and that scared you. did someone hurt her? was she-

her and another goose were making muted honks to each other. they sounded like affectionate honks, which is one of the weirdest sentences you ever constructed in your head. but it was true! they were cuddling close to each other and making really quiet honking noises at each other, and if that wasn’t affectionate then you didn’t know what would be.

so if piper found her soulmate, that means yours was-

"i hope comin' to your job was okay. whitewing wasn't gonna give up until I left, so here we are." your eyes were dragged from the touching scene of piper and her special goose to a pair of dark brown irises that radiated warmth and a promise of happy days.

you were absolutely dumbstruck. your mouth was unable to form coherent words, so you decided to take in the appearance of your soulmate. he was wearing a soft grey tee and sweatpants, and socks without shoes. did he realize how unsanitary the streets of new york were?

but upon further investigation, you realize that he probably didn't walk to the studio. on his back was what you would normally call a jetpack, but when you recognize the face your mind completes the puzzle: your soulmate is sam wilson, otherwise known as the falcon. holy shit.

"uh yeah of course, i guess you flew here? no sane person in new york would walk around barefoot in the street." did you really just say that?!

sam nodded and then remembered that he was in his pajamas in front of his soulmate without any shoes. "yeah, he wasn't gonna stop attacking the tv once he saw uh…"

you realized he was asking for your goose’s name, and so you hastily gave it to him.

"yeah, once he saw piper, he went wild. caused more chaos in five minutes than he did in five days!"

you laugh, the nervousness falling away as you recount the story of you first meeting with piper.

people are staring at the pajama-clad avenger and his soulmate, their geese finally satisfied. after all, it wasn't every day so many people were able to watch soulmate geese (and their people) meet for the first time.

sam gently took your hand, his thumb smoothing the skin on the back of it, just listening to you talk. you asked him a question about whitewing and he was in the middle of telling you when he cut himself off. "i just realized i don't even know your name!"

in most scenarios you’d be slightly put off by this, but you didn't have an issue because of the specific circumstances. if he weren't an avenger you wouldn't have known his either, and plus, no one really pays attention to the little rat writers. you give him your name and smile when he introduces himself, his voice even helping show off the brightest smile you’ve ever seen.

with impeccable goose timing, piper and whitewing honk at you to hurry your introductions and leave the studio.

"do you want to fly back to your place , or can I drive you?" it was a risk to ask him such a question, but you were genuinely concerned. you hoped he wouldn't think you were trying to jump his bones only minutes after meeting him so you used (terrible) humor to show your intentions. "you shouldn't fly so late at night without headlights, no matter how high up you get."

sam’s laughter was infectious and soon you joined him, your geese about to get more irritated with their humans.

"yeah, I'd like that. lead the way, soulmate." piper and whitewing honk as the two of you head to the lobby hand in hand, the birds waddling behind you just as happy as soulmate geese could be.

[emmcarstairs]

The Search for the Lost Husband: Blackdale as the Ballad of Tam Lin

(Art by Wylie Beckert)

“They were falling together. If she held on tight enough, she could bring him back, she thought, like Janet had done for Tam Lin in the old story.” (Chain of Iron)

Fairy tales have been with us since the dawn of time. They have provided foundation for some of the greatest stories we have come to know and love. The key to the success of fairy tale motifs is their resonance with our collective unconscious. All around the world, although sometimes with different symbols, fairy tales explore similar concepts.

Thanks to the Aarne-Thompson-Uther Index, we have a comprehensible catalogue of folk tales from every corner of the globe. The folk tales are divided into several classifications based on their motifs. One of these classifications is known as “The Search for the Lost Husband” or ATU 425, and “Beauty and the Beast” is one of its best known examples. In this analysis, we will take a look at the Scottish ballad of Tam Lin, which falls into this type of folk tales.

There are many versions of the tale since it’s centuries old but the basic outline is thus: A fair young maiden named Janet is the daughter of an earl and lives in a castle next to the forest of Carterhaugh. All the maidens have been warned against entering the enchanted woods for there dwells the faerie prince Tam Lin, waiting to take possession of their chastity. One day, Janet grows bored and being the headstrong woman she is, sets off to explore the forest on her own. In the magical woods, she attempts to pluck some flowers but then all of a sudden Tam Lin appears, demanding to know the reason behind her trespassing on his land. Unfazed, Janet claims that she is the rightful heir to Carterhaugh and she can do as she pleases. After this, Tam Lin takes Janet by the hand or her waist, and when she gets home, she discovers that she is pregnant. 

Once her family realises her situation, they try to pressure her into a marriage of convenience but Janet refuses them. She returns back to the forest to question Tam Lin. He shares his tragic story: once he was a mortal man, but while travelling through the woods, he fell off his horse and was abducted by the Faerie Queen who forced him to serve her as one of her knights. He has been her captive for seven years and is concerned that on Halloween he will be offered as a sacrifice. Tam Lin reveals that Janet might be able to free him if she follows his set of instructions. 

On Halloween, Janet is determined to rescue her beloved and goes back to the forest. There she sees several knights passing by but patiently waits until she recognizes Tam Lin by his white horse and him missing one of his gloves (his signal). She pulls him to the ground and holds him firmly, as instructed, while the Faerie Queen puts several spells on him, transforming him into various beasts which scratch and bite at Janet but she doesn’t let him go. Finally, the Queen turns him into a burning coal, which Janet plunges into a well. Tam Lin emerges as a naked mortal man and Janet, still following their plan, covers him with her cloak. The Faerie Queen admits defeat, crying how she should have given him a heart made of stone and eyes made of wood. 

I believe it is already obvious how much inspiration CC must have drawn from this folk tale. The prologue of ChoG is essentially a re-imagining of its beginning.

Lucie Herondale is the daughter of Will Herondale, “a very important person”, in Lucie’s own words. The Herondales live in their Manor next to Brocelind Forest. One night, just as the woods seem to glow, Lucie ventures to go on a walk. Like Janet, she plucks some flowers, only she arranges them into crowns. In fact, the text stresses that this is the first activity she undertakes in the forest. Eventually, she gets lost and falls into a pit which is coded as a grave with its gleaming white bone. Lucie is caught in a place between life and death, and naturally, enter Jesse Blackthorn who is himself on the threshold. 

Jesse introduces the faerie motif from the get-go, which prompts Lucie to assume that he is indeed a faerie himself. (In ChoI, she refers to him as “a beautiful faerie prince”.) He even tells her that if the faerie gentry caught her, she might have to be their servant forever, which is an allusion to Tam Lin’s tragic fate and his own if we consider the Fairy Queen to be Tatiana/Belial. Lucie then brings up her lineage, her “royal blood” as hinted at even in her monologue, demanding that she be rescued, not unlike Janet who used her birthright as a leverage against Tam Lin. Which leads us to Jesse taking her by the hand, as also found in some versions of the ballad. This contact is important because it symbolizes union. From this point onward, the ballad treats Tam Lin and Janet as lovers. Of course, this is not the literal case in ChoG. But figuratively, Lucie’s encounter with Jesse will stay with her until she meets him again on equal footing. 

Interestingly enough, when Lucie and Jesse meet again in 1903, exactly seven years have passed since he has been dead / a captive of the Fairy Queen. Jesse’s death is a metaphorical slumber in which he has fallen owing to Tatiana/Belial’s doings. According to Tam Lin, every seven years the faerie folk offers a tither to Hell and because he is a mortal by nature, he fears that he will be the one sacrificed. Therefore, the time has come for a major turning point (which we witnessed in ChoI). 

In “The Search for the Lost Husband”, the motif of recognizing one’s beloved is quite common. The ballad of Tam Lin is no exception. We also find it in ChoI, even though it’s more toned down! Lucie has to piece together the facts about Jesse’s backstory as well as the identity of the killer. She is the first one who realizes that Jesse’s body has been used for ill intentions by seeing the runes on his body. Funny how in the ballad the absence of an object is the telltale signal, while in The Last Hours - it’s the presence of runes and blood. While Lucie is preparing herself to dive the sword into Jesse’s body, she acknowledges that the remnants before her are not her Jesse. Her Jesse is the ghost who visits her at night. In ATU 425, the groom is usually human only at night. Thus, she has successfully recognized her lover, which later allows her to face Belial, the Fairy Queen in our story (although I believe both Tatiana and Belial play this role).

In order to bring Jesse back to the mortal realm, she exorcises Jesse’s body from Belial’s anchor. In fairy tales, there is the motif of burning the beast’s skin as a means of breaking the enchantment upon the beast man (e.g. Luke burning Darth Vader’s armor so that Anakin Skywalker may live on). Jesse’s body is virtually his beast’s skin for it was used by a demon and made a murderer in ChoI. In the ballad of Tam Lin, a similar concept is observed - Tam Lin’s body is transformed into a fiery coal. The theme of fire as a cleansing force is observed across mythologies. Water has healing properties as well - Janet is instructed to hurl the coal into a body of water. By using fire and water, Janet baptizes the fallen prince, severing his connection with the faerie realm. Lucie relies on her own powers to purge Jesse of Belial’s dark energy, effectively removing his anchor which has been preventing her from truly accessing Jesse’s soul. 

At the end of the ballad, the Fairy Queen is upset about her defeat and laments the loss of Tam Lin. In ChoI, we have glimpses of Tatiana and Belial’s sour mood after Jesse is no longer in their clutches. However, while the ballad ends here, ChoI is only the second book in a trilogy. Where do we go from here? We shall see. 

Thank you for reading! I’d be glad to hear your thoughts! 

P.S. Now that you’re familiar with Janet’s last instruction - wrapping Tam Lin’s body with her mantle - the fact that Jesse was wrapped in Matthew’s medium-ridiculous overcoat is even funnier. Fingers crossed that this doesn’t jinx it all! 

[ebaeschnbliah]

Still at the centre of the web ….

For the 10th Anniversary of Sherlock BBC (July 2010) the Royal Mail released a lovely collection of six stamps, that display key characters from several episodes of the TV show, as well as hidden messages only revealed under UV light.  (X)

I took a closer look at those stamps in the Anatomy of a Stamp Series:  A Study in Pink   The Great Game   A Scandal in Belgravia   The Reichenbach Fall   The Empty Hearse   The Final Problem

Alongside those stamps and in partnership with The Royal Mint (X),  a special medal has been crafted as well to ‘celebrate Sherlock’s genius – and his nemesis’ ... to explore Sherlock’s ‘turbulent relationship with arch-rival Moriarty’ as the description says. 

A little sideways glance at that medal and the collage of images with which it is surrounded couldn’t be wrong, I thought. :)

TBC below the cut .....

That anniversary medal is available in two versios (cupro-nickel&sterling-silver) and it displays:

on one side - Moriarty’s message ‘Get Sherlock’, the note he carved on the Crown Jewel glass case in TRF, to invite Sherlock to play his game

on the obverse side - ‘The Game is on’, which is meant to be Sherlock’s modern take on the literary version ‘The Game is afoot’

James Moriarty is known to be the famous archenemy of Sherlock Holmes. Contrary to canon, Sherlock BBC introduced that character already in the first episode A Study in Pink and Jim commits suicide (alongside Sherlock) in the sixth episode of the story, which consists of 13 so far. According to canon, Sherlock fakes his suicide and comes back after his hiatus. Although Jim is considered to be really dead for years by now, notes and messages of the character turn up repeatedly on various data carriers ... electronic as well as paper. 

Interestingly, it has been chosen for the 10th anniversary of Sherlock BBC to create fan memorabilia which focuses mainly on the confontration between Sherlock and Jim, whose life ended rather quickly at Bart’s roof in The Reichenbach Fall. A great honour for a character who is long dead and seems to be irrelevant for the ongoing story of this adaptation, in which another character - Mary - married John and shot Sherlock and therefore became a sort of new archenemy. Nonetheless, not only every stamp is - in one way or another - linked to Jim Moriarty, the medal and the collage of images with which it is surrounded, displays also mainly text messages connected to Sherlock’s (in)famous nemesis Jim Moriarty. 

Here’s a summery of those texts + the corresponding screenshots in the episodes. It surprised me though, that I couldn’t match all of them. There are some interesting exceptions. First the obvious ones:

A Study in Pink

Two images have been used to create this manip for the medal collage. Both are visible thoughts out of Sherlock’s mind palace. And both screenshots don’t turn up side by side. Sherlock’s entire thinking process lies between them. Jeff Hope, the man who killed the lady in pink had been sponsored by Jim Moriarty.

RACHE  German (n.) revenge

The correct letter settles into place ... Rachel

He squats down beside the body .... wet

He reaches into her coat pockets and finds the umbrella ... dry

He moves up to the collar of her coat ... wet

He inspects the delicate gold bracelet on her left wrist ... clean

... then the gold earring attached to her left ear ... clean

... and then the gold chain around her neck ... clean

The wedding ring ... dirty

Conclusions appear in front of Sherlock’s eyes ... married ... unhappily married ... unhappily married 10+ years

While the outside of the wedding ring is still showing ... dirty

the inside registers as ... clean

Sherlock has reached a conclusion ... regularly removed

The final deduction about her ... serial adulterer

The Great Game

Three different scenes from this episode have been used for the collage. Two are connected to a serial killer called The Golem, who asphyxiates his victims. One is directly connected to Jim Moriarty, who has planned all the cases in TGG. 

1- The Golem killed Alex Woodbridge, security guard and hobby stargazer. That killer appears for the first time on Sherlock’s radar when he searches on his phone for ‘most wanted’ criminals:

JOHN: He’s dead about twenty-four hours – maybe a bit longer. Did he drown?

Sherlock has called up on his phone: Interpol Most Wanted Criminal Organisations Regional Activities LESTRADE: Apparently not. Not enough of the Thames in his lungs. Asphyxiated.

2- The Vauxhall Arches turn out to be the hiding place of the Golem and Sherlock gets the address from an informant of his homeless network. It’s a note written on a piece of paper:

SHERLOCK: Hold that cab. (John trots back to the taxi while Sherlock goes over to the girl.) HOMELESS GIRL: Spare change, sir? SHERLOCK: Don’t mind if I do. JOHN (to the cab driver): Can you wait here? (The girl hands Sherlock a piece of paper. Unfolding it, he sees that she has written “VAUXHALL ARCHES” on it. Smiling briefly, he turns and walks back to John.)

3- The third image out of this episode is one of the exceptions, because they’re not imagined or written words but an actual text line spoken by Jim Moriarty during his showdown with Sherlock at the pool.

JIM: I’ve given you a glimpse, Sherlock, just a teensy glimpse of what I’ve got going on out there in the big bad world. I’m a specialist, you see ... like you! 

A Scandal in Belgravia

It is Jim Moriarty who adviced Irene Adler how ‘to play the Holmes boys’. It is Sherlock though, who wins that game and is able to get access to Irene’s camera phone. The confirmation of his success appears on her mobil phone screen:

IRENE: Everything I said: it’s not real. I was just playing the game. SHERLOCK: I know. And this is just losing. (Slowly he turns the phone towards her and shows her the screen. She looks down at it, tears spilling from her eyes as she reads the sequence which says: I AM SHER LOCKED

The Reichenbach Fall

Three different scenes from this episode have been used for the collage.

1- Jim Moriarty sends Sherlock his invitation to play the game, while sitting inside the smashed glass cage of the crown jewels, dressed as and equipped with the insignias of a king. The message appears on Sherlock’s phone. This starts the game.

JOHN: Sherlock ... SHERLOCK: Not now. JOHN: He’s back. (Sherlock lifts his head and takes the phone. The message reads: Come and play. Tower Hill. Jim Moriarty x.

2- Sherlock searches for the traces hidden inside the residues of the kidnapper’s footprints. What might be the fifth element? Those five big questionmarks+the number 5 appear as visible thoughts out of Sherlock’s mind palace and are embedded between Sherlock’s rememberence of Jim’s threat ‘I owe you’ and Molly asking about this afterwards. It turns out to be the clue to find the kidnapped children and it marks the beginning of Sherlock’s downfall. 

SHERLOCK: I ... owe ... you. SHERLOCK: Glycerol molecule. He sighs heavily as he struggles to identify the item, seeing it in his head as: 5. ????? SHERLOCK: What are you? MOLLY: What did you mean, “I owe you”?

3- Claudette Bruhl, one of the kidnapped children, seems to recognize Sherlock as her kidnapper. The seed of doubt is sawn at Scotland Yard. Then the letters  IOU appear on the windows of a building opposite. This message proves to Sherlock that it is indeed Jim Moriarty who is behind that kidnapping case.  

LESTRADE: The kid’s traumatised. Something about Sherlock reminds her of the kidnapper. JOHN: So what’s she said? DONOVAN: Hasn’t uttered another syllable. JOHN: And the boy? LESTRADE: No, he’s unconscious; still in intensive care. (In the building opposite Scotland Yard, all the lights in the offices come on. On the second floor, spray paint has been applied to three of the office windows. Sherlock stares at the enormous letters that have been painted: I O U

The Empty Hearse

From this episode two different words out of one of Sherlock’s mind palace deductions have been used for the collage. Sherlock is working on the fake Jack the Ripper case (How I did it), which had been planned by Anderson to lure Sherlock back to London because he firmly believed the detective not to be dead. Sherlock notices the trick though. He comes to the conclusion that the fake corpse is only six moths old and its Victorian outfit had been exposed to first: sun and then: fire damage. (Sun exposure, fire damage, undead .... it’s a bit hard to not get ideas about Dracula here ... X X X  :)

The words ‘pine & cedar’ are displayed again as visible thoughts out of Sherlock’s mind palace. And just like in ASIP those words lie several screenshots appart. For some reasons ‘spruce’ has been ignored: 

LESTRADE: This one’s got us all baffled. SHERLOCK: Mmm. I don’t doubt it. (..... Sherlock sniffs at the body and tries to decide what he is picking up: PINE? SPRUCE? CEDAR NEW MOTHBALLS Moving on, he sniffs again: Carbon particulate ... He sniffs more deeply: Fire Damage

The Final Problem

Images of three different scenes out of this episode have been used for the collage. 

1- The movie Mycroft is watching in his private cinema at his place is interrupted first by images of an old family video, then by Eurus’ message on screen ... “I’m back”. It  announces the return of Eurus, the secret sister.

I’M BACK VOICE: Mycroft ... Mycroft ... MYCROFT: Why don’t you come out and show yourself? I don’t have time for this. CHILD’s VOICE: We have time, brother dear. All the time in the world.

2- Sherlock stands in front of the ‘funny gravestones’ at Musgrave Hall and puts together the dates on the stones until he has a long string of numbers in front of him ... visible thoughts out of Sherlock’s mind palace. This brings Sherlock finally the solution to Eurus’ riddle.

.... 1520 1818 2426 1617 1822 32

3- Just like the numbers, the four verses of Eurus’ riddle appear as visible thoughts out of Sherlock’s mind palace. He connects the string of dates from the gravestones to the verses. It is the second verse that has been used for the collage.

I that am lost, oh who will find me? Deep down below the old beech tree Help succour me now the east winds blow Sixteen by six, brother, and under we go! Without your love, he’ll be gone before Save pity for strangers, show love the door. My soul seek the shade of my willow’s bloom Inside, brother mine - Let Death make a room. Be not afraid to walk in the shade Save one, save all, come try! My steps - five by seven Life is closer to Heaven Look down, with dark gaze, from on high. Before he was gone - right back over my (h)ill Who now will find him? Why, nobody will Doom shall I bring to him, I that am queen Lost forever, nine by nineteen.

The exceptions ...

So far, these have been the obvious links between the images used for the collage and the corresponding episodes of Sherlock BBC. Beneath follow the less obvious and the ones I failed to find a match for. 

Blue chemistry ...

There are two episodes in which chemical formulas are displayed in the form of drawings. 

1- In The Hounds of Baskerville (S2/2) Sherlock is looking for a monstrous hound from hell. Instead he finds the H.O.U.N.D. project in which experiments had been conducted with a deleriant drug, based on fear and stimulus. The informations on this project are key-coded by the name MAGGIE (short for Margaret Thatcher)

2- In The Six Thatchers (S4/1) Sherlock tries - with the help of Toby the bloodhound - to track down the person who smashes plaster busts of Margaret Thatcher in order to find a hidden flash drive with secret informations about A.G.R.A. a group of terrorists. One of the four members had been Mary Watson.

Although there exist several drawn chemical formulas in both episodes, very similar to the one used for the collage, and despite I scanned those scenes screenshot by screenshot, I wasn’t able to find a perfect match. Maybe I still missed something. Maybe that formula on the collage is indeed just an unrelated decoraton .... But it’s interesting to note that the story connects this kind of ‘chemistry’ always to Hounds and Thatcher. (more about chemistry)

Red drop of blood ...

That blood drop used for the collage appears actually in each official episode (TAB as well) because it’s part of the intro. And for the creation of the medal collage, that image has been used two times. In the background there is a smaller and paler version, which is overlapped by a bigger and darker version in the foreground. Of that one, only the lower half is visible. Using two times the same image in one picture, always reminds me strongly of the many Pairs, Twins and Double oh’s mentioned in Sherlock BBC. 

Mostly I connect that ‘sign of two’ with John Watson. In my theory he represents the ‘fixed point in a changing age’, the ‘eternal just-friend and still stubbornly ‘not gay’ Watson, the very aspect in Sherlock’s experiment, that needs to be transformed into a modern version of the same character. In other words: the old king has to make way for the new king. According to the original meaning of the Musgrave Ritual that says about the crown of a king: “'Whose was it? His who is gone. Who shall have it? He who will come.” 

With this in mind it was easy to compare the drop of watery liquid that falls onto a drop of blood in Sherlock’s experiment, to John in the well, drenched by the water Eurus exposes him to. Emotional context indeed. :))))

When a drop of emotions/chemistry brings the blood to a boil ... (1 2)    Drop of blood 

Search: London Bridge ...

That’s the most mysterious addition to the collage. While all the other words and images can be linked to the show .... this one is the absolute exception. A ‘search for London Bridge’ doesn’t happen throughout the whole story. Not once. London Bridge doesn’t even play a role in Sherlock BBC. At least not yet ...

Bridges of Sherlock BBC:

In ASIB Irene Adler texts Sherlock that she can see Tower Bridge from her room. In TST Sherlock stands on Vauxhall Bridge while he realizes the involvement of fake AMO, Vivian Norbury. 

In TLD Culverton Smith gives the cryptic advice ‘We must be careful not to burn our BRIDGES.’ ... at the same time Sherlock walks with Faith through London and crosses Millennium Bridge and Golden Jubilee Bridge beside Hungerford Bridge.

In TFP little Sherlock stands on a small wood-bridge while he is searching for his lost dog Redbeard.

‘Bridge’ as extension of names:

In TGG security guard Alex WoodBRIDGE is found dead at the bank of the Thames, between Waterloo Bridge and Southwark Bridge.

In TSOT guardsman Stephen BainBRIDGE consults Sherlock and starts the case of the Mayfly Man. He is the first of the three guards (Bainbridge, Sholto, Mary) in this episode. (Changing of the Guard)

London Bridge though does not appear in Sherlock BBC so far. This leaves the question ... why is the note to search for that bridge even on the collage? Where does it come from? And why is it so closely connected to the episode spanning double image of the blood drop from Sherlock’s experiment? The words are displayed inside the smaller, paler blood drop. One wonders .....

(Thanks @gosherlocked​ for deciphering ‘London’ in that bridge’s name. :)))

The blue ribbon ...

Something that looks like a ‘blue ribbon’ runs through the lower part of the collage. The very distinctive loop, right under the name Moriarty, gave me the idea that this ‘ribbon’ could be the river Thames. And really, my assuption turned out to be correct, it is the Thames. What’s even better, at this distinctive loop the river coils around the peninsula named ... Isle of Dogs. 

It surely isn’t an unusual thing to add a part from the map of London, including the Thames, to a collage of images related to Sherlock Holmes. After all, Sherlock is a most famous residient of London. It it is also quite fitting, especially for this adaptation, to display Jim’s name side by side with ‘dogs’. Dogs and hounds do play a major role since the beginning and are closely linked to Jim, John and Sherlock. The barking of a dog in the night can be heard right after John wakes from his nightmare in ASIP, missing shoes lead right away to the villain (very similar to the original Baskerville case) and TFP is all about a lost dog/boy. But there is a little bit more that came to mind, when I recognized the Isle of Dogs.

TheGameIsNow ...

During the run-up to TheGameIsNow-Escape Room Event, (summer 2018) a video was released .... a call-out from Mycroft Holmes to recruit volunteers for The Network. As a part of that call-out, Mycroft mentions a ‘rush of incidents across the capital’ and while he speaks, a map of London is displayed on screen on which a red line runs along and strings together the involved locations, which are marked with the ‘eye-sign’ of The Network. And that red line stops exactly at the Isle of Dogs. That’s why I recognized that peninsula immediately.

Again ... one wonders ...

All in all, one can not deny that a lot of considerations, of work and also of knowledge regarding the show, have been put into the creation of those stamps, the medal and the images used for their presentation. And as usual with Sherlock BBC, some little intriguing mysteries have also been woven into it.  :)))

I leave you to your own deductions. Thanks @callie-ariane​ for the scripts. 

January, 2021

[know-the-way]

I know it’s really stupid of me but I was kind of hoping for a redemption arc for Faustus. 😅😢

It’s not stupid, not at all! It’s natural to want to see the best in people, particularly when you believe they can be better than what they are now, so it’s completely understandable.

And, ya know, if the show gets picked up - he may have one yet still, we don’t know!

To me, this season really highlighted what the purpose of Faustus’ character is supposed to be, imo. Thinking of episode 4, we’re shown three different levels of corruption through three different characters.

The first is Harvey. Pure, sweet, golden boy Harvey is revealed to have some deep-seeded hatred of witches. Does he have any reason to hate witches? Well, let’s check - he lost a brother, got manipulated, controlled, and lied to by his first love, and has been in an endless cycle of extreme danger for the past year of his life. I think it’s fair to say we all understand that prejudice is not okay, but is it equally understandable why Harvey has some hang-ups about magic and witches? I personally think it is. (Not to the point of joining a literal witch hunt or angrily accusing your distressed best friend of killing your dad at her 17th birthday party 🙃, but understandable nonetheless.)

I personally think the intention with Harvey’s character being a cadet in Blackwood’s army was to demonstrate how, even when we believe someone to be morally good and just, they can become someone else when they endure pain and that pain is never properly addressed.

Did Sabrina apologize to Harvey for everything that happened between them? Yes. But did she repeat the same troublesome behaviors in different ways after that? Also yes. She didn’t demonstrate change in her actions, and a loootttt more happened with Harvey and the witch world in a negative way beyond his relationship with Sabrina, so the mistrust he feels isn’t entirely unjustified.

Then - “oh wow, oh my God, my second love has also hid being a witch from me, can I catch a fucking break here? Why should I ever trust another witch in my life?”

Answer: because they are humans, none being wholly good or bad, and they love you.

Roz talks to Harvey, tells him she believes he’s good, and demonstrably proves her own “goodness” by sacrificing herself to save others at Dr. C’s. Roz shows Harvey that she means what she says and her feelings for him are real - that she is a scared, broken human like him, just trying to do her best with what life has given her. Hence, when the moment of truth comes - Harvey remembers his humanity and proves his own “goodness” by saving her. But if Roz had never spoken to him, never acknowledged what he’d been through and that his feelings were valid... if no one had ever truly cared about his pain? It seems apparent that Harvey would have continued down a very dark path.

Which brings us to...

Mary. Mary has been literally murdered, had her identity hijacked by a demoness, her fiancé is dead, she doesn’t remember several months of her life, and her previous favorite student is a witch who has seemingly performed magic more than once on her.

Mary has every right to fear witches at this point. She has had zero trustworthy interactions with the witch world and from her perspective - her entire life has been stolen and no one cares. No one checks in on Mary, no one validates her pain, and as a result - no one in the witch world seems to have any compassion, humanity, or kindness in them. Enter the Pilgrims of the Night, who recognize her pain and fear without even knowing her, acknowledge it, and offer her solace in their congregation on the basis that her experience with witches is shared by the Reverend Lovecraft and his flock.

They prove themselves to her when the advice the Reverend/Faustus gives her (“let the dark in”) saves her life. My God, someone finally seems to care if she lives or dies!

People who care about others are good, so the church and the reverend’s mission must be good, too. Therefore, she is absolutely invested in whatever is asked of her and will blindly follow their lead in order to protect others from experiencing what she has. To me, Mary in the perverted universe represented the crossroads of corruption - where you truly believe what you’re doing is the right thing, even if it hurts others because those “others” have hurt you... and they will surely hurt again if you don’t stop them.

However, I think if Mary was finally told the truth - the full truth - and Lilith herself apologized for being the first piece in the puzzle... along with all the other witches... AND they showed that they actually cared about her well-being... Mary could find her way back through forgiveness. Or, at the very least, she could understand and process everything so that she could find a way to heal that doesn’t involve persecuting others.

And now, there’s Faustus. We aren’t entirely clear on Faustus’ history altogether, but we do know he’s had many experiences of being slighted by the churches of darkness (despite following the rules to a T).

He was rebuked by Edward for wanting to marry Zelda after mentoring him for who knows how many years, lost the office of high priest to him, and when he finally gets the title - here comes Edward’s self-righteous brat to fuck him over again. There he is trying to carry out the Dark Lord’s request to get Sabrina to sign her name in the Book of the Beast, even though she insults their doctrines and faith at every turn, and the coven and academy he’s had working like a well-oiled machine for the past 16 years is being slowly ripped apart. Why is the Dark Lord allowing this? Why is he having to endure a meddlesome child’s antics? Why is he not being rewarded for doing exactly as he’s been asked and returning the Church of Night to stability after Edward nearly destroyed it altogether? Like hello Dark Lord, can you throw me a fucking bone here?

Small victories - he finally secures Zelda’s hand in marriage and an audience with the anti-pope. This is what his life should’ve looked like two centuries ago, but no matter. He’s correcting it all now and by Satan, nothing is going to stop him this time.

But then...

Oh cool, Sabrina is here to intervene again and has presented the text of his old rival for consideration along with his (clearly superior) manifesto. What’s that, you say? Oh, she’s also gonna crash my wedding, accuse me of murder, and spread claims about my manifesto without having even read it? Wow, ahaha, sounds hilarious... except why am I not laughing?

He arrives in Rome and gets an inkling that the Dark Lord may finally be taking action about this heretical little monster because he’s offered the title of anti-pope by the unholy high council themselves. Finally, some appreciation! He just needs to hang on a little longer, eliminate these small meddlesome threats, and soon he will reside over a peaceful kingdom far removed from anymore mortal nonsense.

Oh, for fuck’s sake, what do you mean Sabrina convinces the council he’s unfit to be anti-pope? This is bullshit, man! You know what? Fuck this place, I’m gonna make my own damn church and ensure no other headstrong witches like Sabrina Buzzkill Spellman can ruin it. That’ll finally return things to ord- MY WIFE KEPT MY OWN CHILD A SECRET FROM ME?! WHAT THE FUCK?! Alright, that’s it, The Spellmans are clearly here to poison others (ironic foreshadowing) - time to wash my hands of them completely, I am so over thi- what’s that? The Dark Lord’s here? GOOD. About time this asshole showed up to set people straight and remind them that the values of his unholy church, which Faustus has exemplified perfectly, must be respected.

You mean for me to bow down to whom now? The halfbreed brat who has been directly and willfully wreaking havoc on the congregation he’s patiently and painstakingly lead back to greatness? Are you fucking serious, m8? No. Absolutely not. No. I’m getting out of here, and since I won’t have the little twat poison anyone else, I will literally poison them instead. Be free, sheep!

It’s up until this point that I believe Faustus was still mostly at the crossroads stage, same as Mary. He believed everything he was doing was the right thing, based on the teachings from the religion he devoted his entire life to, and that he’d be rewarded for serving the Dark Lord so faithfully - until the Dark Lord proved several times in succession that his religion was all a lie. That three+ centuries worth of groveling and abiding and waiting has meant absolutely nothing.

So now we have the Eldritch terrors. Beings more powerful than the oldest gods. He spends 15 years isolated in a time bubble purifying himself, devoting everything to them, and won’t it be so glorious when they welcome him into his ranks? He’s set them free now, after all, they owe it to him.

But doing the same action over and over and expecting a different result is what? The definition of insanity, friends. Of course the Eldritch terrors reject him, too... of course Sabrina gains their attention and veneration instead... of course he should have tried to seize their power for himself a long time ago... so, fuck it all, he’ll do that now. There is no right and wrong, there is no observed justice - if there was, he would have been rightfully recognized for all the time, effort, and pain he’s endured only to receive nothing in return.* No one ever acknowledged his pain... no one ever even considered it. Over time, that takes its toll.

(*Clearly, I mean this to be from Faustus’ perspective and not my own.)

Of course, he has inflicted more than his fair share of pain himself and I am of the personal belief he needed to pay for that, but... equally imagine being hurt over and over and watching those who did it walk away, not only without reprimand, but with the belief that they were right and just to do it? Could it slowly drain on one’s soul to watch the rules apply to some and not others? Debatable, I suppose, but I personally think yes.

So... I say all of this only to point out that there is still potential to acknowledge his pain. And thus, there is imo still potential to understand, communicate properly (I am very interested in any conversations he and Sabrina may have had during their training - I know he said she took a vow of silence, but clearly some talking occurred for Sabrina to learn so much about the void from him), grow, and finally - for him to be given the chance to repair everything he had a hand in breaking. It wouldn’t be an easy or painless task to get to that point, and no one would be faulted for not trusting him to do so, but I think there is potential for it. If they get picked up and they want to finally allow the characters some time to reflect and process shit, they could include Faustus in that.

[thetomorrowshow]

Slower Than Words Ch. 20

First  -  Previous  -  Next

Been a busy week! I’ll let you know if I need to slow down updates! So how about we visit Virgil, see what’s up with him?

cw: a n g s t, panic attack

~

Virgil couldn't move. Roman had helped him into bed, then sat in the room for a while, trying to talk to him. When Virgil didn't respond, he eventually left, stating that he would be back later.

His world was crashing down around him.

Could he believe that just yesterday, he'd smiled? He'd laughed? Now it was all background noise, mindless buzzing that felt totally inconsequential. There was only one thing that mattered now. Patton.

Therapy had been rough, and Virgil had expected it to be. What he hadn't expected was to go over every meaningful interaction he had with Patton. The doctor had said she was “doing some tests”, so Virgil struggled to keep himself together as he talked about the one person he missed most in the world.

Then, she'd had the audacity—she'd dared to—

Virgil took a deep breath, blood boiling as he remembered that it was she who encouraged these breathing exercises. What if he didn't want to calm down? He deserved to feel, remember, Patton needed him to—

Virgil's legs started quaking, but he paid it no mind. He could not be wrong, admitting he was wrong would be abandoning Patton, he couldn't do that, he wasn't dead, he wasn't gone, he'd always been there and always would.

His breathing quickened, coming in short, shallow breaths. His entire body was shaking, and Virgil nearly puked when he realized he could smell rubbing alcohol. He hadn't had a flashback all week, he'd been doing so well!

As if summoned, there were gentle fingers on his wrist. Calm, the fingers traced. It's okay. I'm here.

“Patton,” Virgil croaked. “I—I knew it, you're here, you're here, I knew it—”

V breathe slow. Safe.

Virgil got his breathing under control after a dozen rounds of exercises. His legs were still quivering, but he knew where he was. He was in his room, in Roman's house, and he was going to be okay, and Patton—

Virgil choked.

His own hand gripped his wrist. His own hand was tracing soothing words.

“She was right,” Virgil whispered. His mind frantically grasped at straws, trying to explain what had just happened, as Virgil felt an overwhelming amount of despair.

“Virgil, you talk a lot about Patton. In every instance you told me about, however, you never hear him. You can't see him. Based on your time alone at the beginning of your imprisonment, it seems unlikely that they would suddenly decide to move you into a room with another person.”

Virgil's body had been completely out of energy, lax and unable to move, but now he was stiff as a board, locked in place. It couldn't be. It couldn't.

“We haven't been able to find out what that book was, based on your description of it.”

No. No no no no no.

“And I've seen you trace words onto yourself, in times when you need comfort. An interesting coping habit, one that might appear when a person is locked in a room with no outside stimulation.”

Virgil sobbed, full on weeping as his body couldn't move. This couldn't be happening. This couldn't be real.

And that was exactly the problem, wasn't it?

“Virgil, I think Patton may have been a hallucination that your brain fabricated in order to keep you comfort during the year that you were alone. I may be wrong, but everything you've told me about Patton points to it. Virgil, can you be absolutely certain that Patton was real?”

He'd said yes, he'd said that there was no other option. He'd stormed out of the office five minutes later. He'd refused to talk to Roman in the car. He'd gone straight to his room and curled up on top of his blankets.

Patton had to be real, didn't he? He couldn't have made up a person so complex, so loving, so wonderful. And, more realistically, he couldn't have created something so solid it had washed his clothes on days he felt too ill. Unless he'd imagined it. Anything was possible if it came from his head, wasn't it?

One part of him was screaming, begging him to not abandon his best friend. The other part of him was mourning the loss of Patton. Virgil wasn't sure what to do, torn this way. He had to be real. He was real—but was he? Where was the evidence?

The world was crumbling. Virgil choked on his tears, crying for Patton, crying for himself, crying for the loss he'd just suffered. Patton wasn't real, Patton had to be real, Patton couldn't be real.

Roman knocked on the door, asking cautiously if Virgil wanted to come down for dinner. Virgil pretended to not hear him, feigned sleep when Roman opened the door to look in. He buried his eyes in his pillow as he heard the door quietly shut, then Roman's footsteps retreating. He was alone, isolated, and the one person he'd truly loved had probably never even existed.

What was Virgil supposed to do?

-

“Dude, what does it say?”

A long silence. Virgil groaned. Apparently he'd gotten an email as well as a letter, but Roman had insisted on reading it to him. Screen-readers were 'too impersonal' now. It wasn't like he was going to get his information any other way.

“Virgil, I . . . I'm sorry.”

Virgil's heart dropped. Roman sounded lost for words, his voice cracking in the middle of the sentence. There was no way whatever the letter said was good news.

“You . . . you got in!”

In a shot of adrenaline, Virgil smacked him. Probably on the arm.

“Ow! That was my face, you heathen!”

Oops.

“Roman! Don't—why—” Virgil could barely speak. He'd gotten in? He was certain he wouldn't get in the first time, let alone twice . He got in!

“It's my job, as your adopted older brother!” Roman said, the false hurt completely gone from his tone. “I have to bully you a bit! You should've seen the look on your face, it was priceless!”

Virgil frowned, his heart still racing. He shook his head in an attempt to clear it a bit. “I'm . . . older than you?”

“Doesn't matter! I am, by proxy, older!”

Virgil snorted. “That makes no sense, dude.”

“Doesn't have to!” Roman proclaimed. Virgil could practically see him doing some dramatic arm thing. “I'm the older brother, and therefore, I don't have to make sense!”

Virgil tilted his head back in an approximation of rolling his eyes. According to Roman, it looked pretty creepy when he actually rolled his eyes, and it stung a little. Still, he would probably roll his eyes once he was around people who weren't Roman's parents.

He was really going back.

He sniffed, his nose burning. It had been so, so long. Had the campus changed? Would he be in a different dorm? Would he and Roman still share, since they were in different grades now?

He knew everything about their accessibility and whatever, about how they would accommodate disabled people. The school had actually reached out to him, informing him that he could finish his degree no problem, they had four or five visually impaired students already and could easily make it possible for him to continue his education. Virgil had been in contact with various foundations in order to work things out with his university, and he'd gotten a few scholarships—not to mention, the handful of scholarships he'd already had had gladly reinstated themselves. In fact, Virgil had pretty much already known that he'd be going back. There'd been very little room to doubt, as his therapist had told him several times.

This was real, though. Right there, in Roman's hands, was proof. He was allowed back, and would see teachers and classmates he hadn't seen in over a year. He was starting spring semester, which was still a few months away—Roman, despite his protests, had also put off starting his junior year until spring semester.

“Virge? Are . . . you okay?”

Virgil sniffed again, wiping his cheek to find a few tears there. “Yeah, I'm fine,” he said, with an attempt at a laugh. “I just . . . didn't think this would ever happen, y'know?”

Roman also laughed, albeit much more nervously. “With the way admissions was basically begging you to come back? Of course it happened!”

Neither of them acknowledged what Virgil really meant.

“So, packing?” Roman said, after several seconds of silence. “I know it's a while away, but is there anything specific you want to bring?”

With a pang, Virgil thought back to his hand-stitched hoodie. Hopefully it was bringing Patton as much comfort as it had always brought him. He'd had it for years, made it in Home Ec in high school. Until recently, he'd never been without it. It was bittersweet, in a way. Sure, it was gone, but it was with Patton. Like . . . like a piece of his heart would always be with Patton.

Virgil shook himself. That's stupid. And cheesy, he told himself. Grow up. Move on. He doesn't exist.

There was an ASL club on campus, one that Virgil planned on becoming a part of. Roman wanted to as well, making up something about having always wanted to learn sign, but Virgil knew it was just protectiveness. Virgil was pretty sure Roman had been about to rearrange his entire schedule so that they could have the same classes, despite the fact that Roman was a year ahead and in a different program of study. After a long evening of Virgil sitting in his room anxiously while Roman talked to his parents in the living room downstairs, Roman had come to the conclusion that it was best for him to continue with his intended major. Virgil was relieved—he was a grown adult, after all. He didn't really want someone trailing after him everywhere, insisting on helping him with every little thing.

Did he?

“Am I ready for this?” he wondered aloud. Roman gripped his shoulder tightly.

“I think so.” The words were soft, but no less powerful than Roman's usual loud tone. “You're so strong, Virgil. You're the strongest person I know.”

Virgil couldn't help but cringe. He knew someone much stronger. Whether that person was real or not was up for debate.

His most recent therapy sessions had involved a lot of tears, but Virgil had agreed to acknowledge that Patton might not exist. In turn, the doctor agreed to not make a formal assessment on Patton for the time being. It was still devastating, of course. It was still as if his entire world was falling apart. But Virgil was finding it easier to smile, more natural to joke with Roman.

He was healing.

Did he want to heal?

Yes, of course Virgil wanted to heal. He wanted to move on. He wanted to lead a normal life, without hurt and flashbacks and hallucinations.

But not without Patton.

There was a fork in the road approaching, Virgil was sure of it. He was going to have to choose between waiting for, hoping for Patton, and moving on. He wasn't sure what would happen when he reached that point.

But it scared him that he would have to make that decision alone.

~

Taglist (let me know if you want to be added/removed): @enragedbees @gotta-love-alejandra @bunny222 @basiic-emo @patt0n-sanders @rosiepupper @fangirlgeekandfreak @dn-fan21 @that2000skid @remy-the-lemon-berry @itsadastraperaspera @xionbean @sanderssides-angst @hell-yea-we-gay-tonight @maybedefinitely404 @broken-pencils @thewhimsicallibrarytech @doomllily @hereissananxiousmess @judyismydog  @arodynamic-enby @at-that-one-nerd @therapysides

[justalittletomato]

Maul X Reader Drabble

Shockingly not about dad!Maul! 

This little drabble is more of a start for the relationship of Maul and the reader, it will be a bit angsty mostly as Maul can’t quite grasp his emotions and the Reader is trying her best not to let her feelings be known. 

Some quick backstory to help: Reader is Mandalorian, and now works alongside the brother’s. She tends to know more than expected for someone with her status and this has saved her again and again and now here she is working with some Sith. 

Lingering Night 

The knock on the door was a welcome change from the endless text before him however he knew Savage was not up at this hour and Almec was sure to stay clear of being alone with Maul., therefore the only person could be…

“It’s me, sir. “ Y/N’s voice called out,

“I brought some data you might want to review for the council meetings, I can just leave them outside if you’d like.”

There was a shuffle and soft curse from her. Maul pulled away from the desk and stood stretching after too many hours reading endless contracts and negotiations  that would likely be revised and altered by Almec then by Y/N once again, “Enter , Y/N” The young woman poked her head in, “I just wanted to…” her face reddened and she pulled back out from the door stammering, “Sir do you want me to wait a bit longer so you can dress?”

Sometime during his work he had forgone his tunic, leaving the crimson skin and black markings of his torso bare, Y/N reaction was amusing to say the least.

“There’s no need, come in” Again a soft curse under her breath, Y/N slowly crept into the room, looking straight at his face trying her best to minimize the tale tell blush on her cheeks. Even at this late hour Y/N was still in her gown from the last council meeting so many hours prior, she walked to the desk and placed down the data pads before again just staring at his face alone,

“ You have to review the settlements with Black suns and the Pykes there’s also some government business Almec wants reviewed. If you would like I can assist, it’s governmental sanctions, place-holding the new council, reestablishing the boundaries. “  

The time for amusement was over, Maul just did the same giving her an unwavering stare, Y/N felt her composure begin to waver, “Did I misspeak, Lord Maul?”

Her eyes flitted to the floor, “I am sorry-“

he interrupted her immediately ,“ You continue to perplex me, you know more than some of the current officials. How is that?”  He picked the first data pad, Y/N had already annotated the settlements, and offered suggestions and highlighted contentious content. Each aside citing a bylaw or previous settlement that had been transacted,  Maul waited for her answer.

Y/N raised a brow, “I thought you had already heard,” given the lack of reaction from him, Y/N just took a deep breath and began,

“I’m the daughter of one of the more influential families on Mandalore, however, being a bastard only allows you education and no titles, its why I was stuck as handmaid for the past 5 years,”    

“I thought Mandalorians  didn’t care for bloodlines?” he watched as her y/ec eyes looked away a look of resentment marring her usually calm features as she mulled over how to explain the next part.  Maul  opened another data pad, more annotation. He should be angry that she was looking over all this information, but if it saved him time for the next step of the plan he was more than pleased. Y/N always brought results.

   “To a degree”, she started again  “Foundlings are gladly accepted into families as they have no one, but family loyalty in mandalore is important. Martial lines are fortified they need to be honored,” her eyes narrowed as she continued on “Having a child outside of one’s marriage is a great offense. These children are usually raised up as foundlings if they can get away with it.” she had paused Maul again looked to her, she had finally looked up at him again, her eyes had lost their brightness now just passive, “ or  you’re like me, people find out and raise you up with the stigma. Ostracized and kept away from a place that should be yours paying for a mistake that you were never a part of. “  She ended, her matter of fact tone slightly unsettling, as if she rehearsed this explanation for years. Her face was void of any affect, she kept looking at Maul waiting for the inevitable sign of dismissal or reproach. Instead Maul just gave another glance down at the pad, what could he say? He was seen as a scourge upon the galaxy maybe his lack of reaction would benefit her.

Instead he heard her release her held breath, “Well now if that is all. I’ll take my leave,I can recommend another councilor to help you Lord Maul,”  Y/N wanted to run it was pure reflex now before he could throw her out.

She turned to go struggling to keep her face calm and her tears from rising, she felt him  grab her wrist. Y/N looked back to Maul tugging her away from the door, “ as I have mentioned you know more, you started this great work let’s finish it.” golden eyes stared down at her y/ec.  She was going to run he could sense her panic he found he did not like that reaction in her, he tugged her a little more, “ You are one of my councilors and clearly the most competent.

Y/N ket out a shaky breath and allowed herself a small smile “Of course.” ,  she walked with him back to the desk, setting open the latest data pad, “Well this one is more than a bit unfair I think we can…” there she was again, composed and confident while her heart betrayed her with its insistent flutters.

She makes herself useful anything to gain favor, Maul notes as they walk to the throne room Y/N double checking the duties of the day and meetings she can help with as long as he’s around else no one would listen. However he also notes Y/N does not do it in  a manner of groveling. She needed to have a place, she needed to show she was of use, for years she had been denied this a feeling Maul knew too well and seeing Y/N flourish in her new role was a delight. He watched as  she sometimes has to bite her tongue before making a remark, her composed features only marred by a slight twitch at the corner of her full lips. He admired her composure, even as the other councils bristled y/n just refuted each time, ready with a rebuttal and if not the calmness to accept their input for consideration before returning back to Maul with another point of the argument.  He enjoyed the utter shock and anger the council showed, y/n had bested them as she always did.  She would smile at him and Maul gave her an approving nod.

“I could just choke them for you it wouldn’t be a difficult task.” They were back to working at night again, with Y/N pouring them some spice tea to keep them awake. She had learned caf made him anxious, she had walked around the gardens with him as he tried to settle back down at some point she had even gripped his hands with hers to try and help, it had, but Y/N would not risk that again. She had stayed in the room that night curling up at one side of the bed, and Maul on the other. By morning she had woken to the Zabrak curled up behind her, a glimmer of hope has risen within her only to be squandered when Maul had woken up and just apologized and promised to make sure that it wouldn’t happen again. “

To address his offer, Y/N gives him a disapproving look, “They already don’t like me, let’s not add kindle to the fire,” she looked over his shoulder and leaned over to point at the pad, “You forgot to sign this one. “ she had a hand on his bare shoulder with her lips close to his cheek, Maul normally would let her linger calmed by her proximity and helpful reminders but today he scrunched his face in annoyance, “You can’t possibly agree with this settlement. They practically want to take over the foundry.”

This is where she gave a laugh, genuine and one that tickled his cheek, Maul let the warmth wash over him before returning back to a scowl. Y/N of course elaborated what she had found,  “ Those Pykes didn’t ask about which foundry, this was one is practically depleted. I was overlooking the mining records it was seen as last resort not that they know that and the records are sealed so it could just have been an error.”

It was silent, “You should take Almec’s place, you are more competent that that blithering chess piece”  Y/N  deserved a higher status she knew the workings of Mandalore better than anyone, she could easily run this planet. With y/n at the helm he could continue his next steps to reach other regions of the galaxy and pool current resources.  The thought pleased him, his brother on his right and Y/N on his left. Y/N at his side that ever faithful Mandalorian who was ever present and who worked with him. He let himself imagine more nights going over plans and details and the ever lingering smell of Y/N’s tea collection as she whispered and let thier hands brush.  

“With you at my side the power struggles would quickly cease.” He said to her, “ You can picture it don’t you, with the three of us we’d be ready to overcome anything,” Y/N’s smile fell slightly but she didn’t dare pull away, however  she had to know , “ In what capacity do you mean?” she needed to hear him say it, thought she already knew the answer.  

Maul looked up at her from his seat, “As my advisor, me and Savage owe you that much , it’s what you deserve.” He expected her to give him another brush of thier hands as she did, instead Y/N just stared at him her y/ec eyes again slowly loosing thier brightness, and gives a small nod.

“Of course that would be an honor,”  Maul felt her pull away from his side, the familiar comfort of her presence slowly slipping away,

“ I think that’s enough for tonight,” she said gently, Y/N struggles not to throw something, how could she allow herself to react this way. She should even be feeling like this!

Maul got up slowly, “But you just poured tea,” why was she trying to go? he was giving her what she wanted, now they could be closer than before,”  I’d say we still have some time.”  

Y/N forced herself to give a half smile, “ I suppose you’re right” she sat opposite to him, Maul waited for her to bring her chair closer as they had done for the past few weeks, but she did not she just began to work and sip her tea.

Maul followed suit trying to ignore the knowing feeling that something had been twisted on both ends.

[kathyrealmstales]

NEW SMP THEORY! (I cracked the plot!)

Hello! I came up with a new theory, but this time I did some real work and I didn't just throw out random ideas. Crazy, right?

But seriously, I think I have a good theory for today.

Disclaimers: to begin with, spoilers for Dream SMP and Kingdom Heart. (Strange to see that game in a warning for the SMP, huh? Well, we will get to that soon.)

Also, just remember this is roleplay, all the actors are friends. If I see you trash-talking the actors you're being blocked. I don’t like hate.

I also wish to thank my sister for her assistance. I don't know much about the Kingdom Heart fandom except with what the Wiki tells me by watching my sister play it, so my sister had to suffer while I tried to find connections in a block game roleplay. Thank you so much, my loving sister.

Under this line is the theory! Hope you enjoy it!

------------------------------------THE START--------------------------

If you are familiar with the tales of the SMP, then you might already know a common theory.

The theory is that the TOTSMP area, "The In-between," is based on Castle Oblivion from Kingdom Heart. It looks exactly like the interior of the castle in the game, as well as the idea of losing memories. It's a cool easter egg.

However, my theory doesn't stop there, because I began to see more connections, making me believe that maybe the latest plot of the SMP is following a bit of Kingdom Heart plot.

Let me try to break it down into evidence and explanations.

In the latest episode of TOTSMP, Karl travels to this new world, escaping the "In-between" and going to this place called “The Other Side.” A strange name, but what is even stranger is that I felt I had already seen the castle before, so of course I did some research.

For starters, I noticed the In-between warned Karl that if he left, he would lose all of his memories, kind of like in Kingdom Heart when Sora went to that sleep state, he lost his memories. I thought there had to be a connection to the Kingdom Heart and this new world Karl was in now since it seemed to be following a pattern.

I tried to do more research by using Wiki and looking up other castles in the game that it could be. I came up with a few ideas, but none of them stuck. It just made no sense, so I went to the only person I know who knows Kingdom Heart more than me, my sister.

My sister and I love playing these games together, but while I'm just trying to figure how the game works (because of my love for coding), my sister listens to the plot and knows way more than I. Sure, we haven't finished all the games, but she knows enough to help me. So we got on the phone to figure out how this new world was connected, and when I left that call, I saw the Dream SMP in a whole new light.

- The Other Side evidence

We have an idea of what the Other Side looks like but that’s it. My sister believes it resembles the Hollow Bastion, which is intriguing. She claims it is linked to Castle Oblivion, but what makes it more interesting is that she said this place is also usually where the Kingdom Heart stories end. This got my attention since Dream hinted that the story’s end might be approaching soon. (I hope it's not-)

I then thought we had a good idea for the theory, a rather small one about the TOTSMP but a good one. So still wanting to talk to her, I told her why I was asking for her ideas, and then I explained the Dream SMP plot to her. The more we talked about the plot, though, the more my sister and I noticed parallels between the stories.

-

Eggpire evidence

To begin, we discussed the Egg People. I jokingly said, "Oh, does Kingdom Heart have mind-controlled people?" She replied, "if you count the heartless." Which shocked me because it makes the Egg People’s ability to pick who is controlled or not make so much sense!

You see, the Heartless are people without a heart (Hearts are similar to people's souls in the game, which is strange. But oh well). The heartless follow the rules of the Darkness. I'm not sure whom or what controls the Darkness, but I do know they are subjected to some sort of mind control or animal instinct. The most important aspect to consider is how they multiply. They seek out characters from whom they can steal hearts of so they can turn back into normal people. However, they need their own heart, not just a random one, so this method is ineffective and just makes more heartless.

Because of this information, I came up with a theory that may be the reason why the egg only works on certain people. I think it is the same reason why only some turn heartless. People with weak souls are usually turned, while people with more light in their souls are typically more difficult to turn to a heartless, implying that while Puffy and Sam had weak souls at the time, they are becoming stronger, making it more difficult for "darkness" or the egg to mind control them.

Also, this would explain why Tommy can't be mind-controlled at all; he is mostly made of light, and everyone sees him as the hero. It would just make sense; it’s really hard to control him.

-

Pandora’s box evidence

There seems to be a correlation with the prison. This one is probably my favorite because it makes the most sense to me.

Most theories believe the prison is similar to Pandora's Box, owing to the prison's name. However, Kingdom Heart had its own Pandora's Box, and no, I'm not referring to the one in Hercules' world. I'm talking about the box that was told to never be opened.

I don't know everything about Kingdom Heart, therefore, I can't go into great detail about this box like I did with the Heartless theory, but basically, the main dude who started the plot of Kingdom Heart had a bunch of apprentices, and he left them with a box that they were never supposed to open. Of course, the bad guys got the box and opened it, only to discover that it contained some time-traveling stuff, which caused some of the apprentices and The Keyblade of all Keybladeds to appear.

If we take that information and put it in place with Dream SMP characters, it looks like where the plot might be going. Dream is the main bad guy who opens the box with whatever he has. What emerges is Wilbur Soot, a man from the past, he takes the place of the apprentices and Tommy is the Keyblade of Keyblades.

What makes me believe Tommy is the Keyblade? I mean, It could be someone else, but the thing is, Dream keeps referring to Tommy as "the Key," and in Kingdom Heart, Sora is also referred to as "the Key." It's also possible that it could be Ranboo, since the key is made of both darkness and light, and Ranboo appears to look as if he is both, but this is all just speculation at this point.

Either way, I think we as a fandom were on the right track, thinking evil black boxes, just not Pandora’s box.

-

Organizations evidence

This is only tangentially related, but Kingdom Heart did have their group of evil bad guys whom, based on what I saw in the cut scenes, didn’t care if you show up to meetings or not. (basing this off of all those empty chairs. Then again, those chairs were really high up, I would miss meetings too if I had to sit in those things.)

Another thing to note about this organization is that they disliked higher authority, but this one opposed them because they were all about good and needed the princess's light, whereas the anarchist syndicate in the SMP were more anti-government. Nonetheless, both are going after government officials.

(The organization also had code names that were their real names, but with an X in them and scrambled around. They weren't as cool as the Anarchists Syndicate’s nicknames, but there was a connection.)

-

Now we'll look at the improbable evidence, as well as thoughts that might not make much sense.

-

Bad guys with correlations

The antagonist in Kingdom Heart had a bunch of copies of himself, procured with the help of time travel. I find this amusing, especially given that we know there are multiple Dreams in canon, including Dream, DreamXD, Mexican Dream, Girl Dream, and (possibly) Drista. It's almost as if he's the main antagonist, especially when considering the-- Norted thing, (that's what my sister called it. I'm not sure about the name, so we'll go with Norted Thing for now) The point is, he can control some people if they are willing, but they can rebel if they have strong hearts (again, I believe this is the case). This reminds me of Ranboo and his enderwalking state in which he hears Dream’s voice in his head. Again, just a hunch.

-

The plot is the same

This is the last piece of evidence I have, and it is the main fact from which I derived all of the connections. After my sister and I discussed the possibility of it being linked, I jokingly said during our call, "There are so many connections between the latest plot of the SMP and Kingdom Heart, The only difference I feel like they have is that the Dream SMP is all about how there is no bad or good, just greyscale, while Kingdom Heart is about dark vs light."

My sister responded, "It's the same thing. Most people believe it is dark vs. light, but the more you play the games, the more you realize it isn't. The majority of the characters begin as good or bad and gradually reveal their true selves. Nobody in the story is completely light or dark."

This shocked me because I always thought Kingdom Heart was about bad versus good. So now we've matched the main ideas as well!

Ohhh boy!

-

This is all I have for now. If you have anything to add, please send it to me as a comment or a submission, or simply make your own post and let me know so I can see it! (I know as I wrote this I found more connections, but I’m saving them for later.)

But, in any case, I believe you can see the idea--Dream SMP has some connections to the Kingdom Heart plot, assuming my theory is correct. It wouldn't be the first time. Dream SMP has loosely copied the Broadway show, Hamilton during the L'manburg war, and I know the writers like Disney at least for right now, so it makes sense.

I'm also going to leave you with this: Our Fandoms are the same, We get information that makes no sense and we have no idea where it fits in the puzzles, and we know (sometimes) the writers don't know either, so we just have to accept and enjoy it.

THAT IS ALL! GOOD DAY!

[geekywritings]

Rise of a Queen - Nikolai Lantsov x OC PART 10

"What?"

Taya didn't quite know how to process Nikolai's last words. Surely they must mean something else. Silence hung in the air, as the winds around them began to pick up. It just wasn't clear whether they had come naturally or whether Taya had subconsciously used her powers.

"I said, a Queen doesn't bow.", Nikolai repeated, more seriously this time. What they had was fresh and new and he was probably rushing things, but he wasn't one to wait once his mind had latched onto an idea. Besides, Taya was the right one for the crown, he knew. She had shown intelligence and the willingness to give up everything for her country. At the same time, she could be passionate and understanding. And she was the perfect one for him.

"Stop teasing." She still didn't believe a word he said.

So he closed the short distance between them, grasping her hands in his. "I'm serious.", he insisted. "When we get back to Os Alta, marry me."

This should be the most joyous moment in her life. She had read about so many proposals in books and fairytales, but the reality of it was staggering. Taya was happy because this wasn't just a political move on his side now, but at the same time unsure, because it had come so suddenly.

"I love you, Nikolai.", she started.

"Oh Saints, this sounds like the beginning of a rejection...", he breathed out with a nervous chuckle.

"It's not a rejection.", Taya clarified. "It's more of an 'Are you sure? You should take your time to think about it'."

But Nikolai didn't need more time. The more he thought about it, the more certain he became that this was right. "I know what I want. I want you, Taya. As my wife and Queen."

She was far too susceptible to his charm, she realized. The way he looked at her now, so full of love and determination, while his hands held her securely, had her ready to say yes over and over again.

"I want to marry you.", she finally said. "I want to spend my life with you." His arms flew around her, ready to sweep her up, but she paused him for just a moment. "But first, let's solve the problems we have on our hands now. Your coronation and the Darkling."

Now he did lift her up, holding her tightly to himself and laughing happily. "Anything you want, my Queen."

_______________________________

Although Nikolai would have loved nothing more than to shout it out to the world, Taya convinced him to keep their engagement secret for now. Other things took priority and so their lives quickly fell back into a routine. They needed to continue preparations for a possible attack, while Alina practiced the Cut with Baghra.

During the two weeks that followed, Nikolai and Taya often made the journey to Os Alta and back to initiate Nikolai's reign. As she had expected, the shift of power wasn't that unwelcome at first. Nikolai had proven himself during the last months and so the generals and nobles were ready to pledge their allegiance. A proper coronation would have to wait, however, the event being far too open for an attack.

They celebrated in their small circle of friends, however, toasting to a better future for Ravka. If only the laughter and banter of that evening could have lasted forever...

________________________________

The attack came unexpectedly. They had all felt safe at the Spinning Wheel, hidden away in the mountains. But the Darkling had found them regardless and within minutes, they had Nichevo'ya raining down on them, tearing everything and everyone they could grab into pieces. It was a massacre just as bad as the one at the capital weeks ago.

"You need to get them into safety!", Nikolai had shouted for Taya, as children and injured soldiers and Grisha boarded the one aircraft they had managed to get ready. "Take them to the capital!"

She didn't want to. She wanted to stay behind and told him as much. "Do it for me.", he said, before pulling her into a kiss.

"Please be careful.", she whispered.

"I never am. That's what you love about me." Despite the chaos, she smiled.

As she summoned the wind, she felt a horrible knot form in her stomach. It wasn't right to leave. She turned to look back, seeing Gregori and Alexander standing next to Nikolai. The two Squallers had become fiercely loyal to him and were currently on the lookout for possible attackers. Yet although they had kept Nikolai safe before, Taya had a bad feeling this time. Something in her heart screamed that she would not see him again. Then the clouds blocked her vision, as she continued on to the newly fortified Little Palace in Os Alta.

_________________________________

"We saw the Darkling get close to him... And we haven't seen him since."

Taya sank to her knees at those words, the tears spilling out just a moment later. She was in the Grand Palace, in Nikolai's working chamber, where Genya and David were giving her a report. Or rather a retelling of the things they had seen.

Gregori and Alexander were there as well, one of them sporting a broken arm. They had given their own reports already, including the moment where they had been absorbed in a fight with several Nichevo'ya and had lost sight of their new Tsar.

Taya had never felt so empty. She didn't even hear anything else Genya said at this point. Something about Alina, Dva Stolba and a firebird. But what did it matter? The next thing she consciously realized was Genya by her side, trying to help her up, but she would not budge.

"Nikolai...", his name escaped her in a sob and more tears followed. She should have married him the day he had asked. She should have told him ten times a day how much she loved him. She should have... There were too many things she should have said and done. None of which she would get a chance for now.

"The generals are asking for you.", Sonya announced, as she walked into the room, before realizing the scene in front of her. She was being accompanied by Andrej, who was quick to dash forward.

"She is in no state to see them now.", he announced what everyone clearly saw already.

"Then I will go and speak to them." Zoya had kept back all this time, dealing with the situation in her own way.

"And what will you tell them?", Genya asked.

"The truth. That now is a time for mourning and that we will deal with all matters in three days' time." Head raised high, she turned on her heel and walked out, ready to handle the situation at hand.

"Taya, you need to get up.", Genya spoke gently. "Let Andrej bring you to your room."

No answer, just more tears and sobs. But she didn't fight when the Healer picked her up carefully, carrying her through the hallways towards Nikolai's chambers that everyone knew they had shared in recent times.

"Not a good idea.", Sonya pointed out and instead guided the small group back to the Little Palace, where Taya was placed in one of the empty rooms. They all deemed it better if she was not surrounded by his belongings right now.

Alexander and Gregori returned to their respective rooms, while David and Genya went to check on Zoya. Sonya took it upon herself to get some tea and food for Taya, while Andrej did a quick checkup. She was badly shaken and probably in shock, but there was nothing he could do for her. She was mourning and she would just need time.

____________________

Things got even worse when news reached that her family had died during their escape, leaving her orphaned as well. For three days Taya refused to touch food. Most of the time she would sit in bed, cry and keep her thoughts to herself. She would not push people away, but she wouldn't engage with them either. She was like a shell of a person, existing, but not really alive. The people around her tried everything they could to help her, but nothing seemed to work.

Therefore it was a surprise for everyone when, after a week, Taya suddenly appeared in the war room, where Zoya, Genya and David were speaking with the generals gathered there. She walked in quietly, her head raised high and looking royal in her dark blue dress and Squaller Kefta. All present bowed their head, as she announced: "Tell me what we have so far."

She was all business from that moment on. She coordinated war efforts, continued Nikolai's work on weapon production, and continuously evaluated news about the Darkling's and Alina's whereabouts. She took care of Ravka's finances and wrote letters to foreign diplomats and rulers in his name. Nobody questioned her or asked, whether she was entitled to fill that role. Instead, they all treated her like their acting ruler.

At night was the only time when she would show her true feelings. Maids would always find her pillow drowned in tears in the morning despite the sleeping potion she took every night to find peace in the first place. She also continued staying in the Little Palace, still unable to set foot into Nikolai's old chambers.

One night, when she was working late, calculating expenses, she thought she saw something pass in front of the window, but it was so dark, it was probably her mind playing tricks on her. From that moment on, she worked the nights in a windowless corner of the library.

Days passed, then weeks and eventually, the attack on the Spinning wheel happened more than a month ago. For those who had no one to mourn, life had become normal again in the capital and it showed when nobles suggested social events to pick up again. Taya allowed it, but never attended for more than five minutes to greet everyone. She was still all work and while the weapon production had accelerated formidably, her friends worried about her. Even Zoya, who had come to respect Taya's work ethic and dedication, knew that she was far from alright.

"We have news from Alina.", she announced one day, coming to the desk at the library that Taya had turned into her working corner.

"Good ones, I hope.", Taya said, as she continued to write a letter to a Kerch trader, they owed money to.

"Yes, they found the third amplifier and know where to attack the Darkling."

Those weren't the first good news, but certainly, the best in a while, and Taya even dropped her work and turned around to face the messenger.

"Very good. Make sure everything is prepared for their arrival and the attack. I will go myself as well."

"No." Zoya had never disagreed with her before and it startled Taya. "You cannot go. You are needed here.", the other Squaller continued. "We have lost one good ruler already. Ravka cannot lose another."

Taya should have been touched by such a clear compliment from none other than Zoya Nazyalensky, but it was not her forefront emotion.

"I want my revenge, Zoya."

"And you will get it. Through Alina.", the other said. "Take your revenge in a different way. Create a Ravka that the Darkling would have loved to build on fear and merzost and show him that he isn't needed."

She was right of course, but Taya hesitated. She would love nothing more than to take the dark one out with her bare hands, but that was impossible. Not even improbable, but truly unfeasible. This power belonged to Alina alone.

So eventually she nodded. "But please give the sun summoner any and all resources she may need. Provisions, weapons, men, or otherwise. She has my full support."

Zoya bowed and left.

__________

Don’t forget, you can also read the chapters on Wattpad: https://www.wattpad.com/story/275585861-rise-of-a-queen

[cantdwellonanyofit]

I Don't Think Enough Before I Say Too Much - Ch 4.

Gene and Snafu eventually arrive at Snafu's house.

I don't know if it's a good or a bad thing that I have to keep editing the tags on AO3 to provide warnings about the smut I can't stop writing.

Dedicated to: Stolzerpunge who is quite obviously one of my favourite people on this planet. Also, she's the one who mentioned rubbing the bridge of Gene's nose and I give full credit to her for that beautiful sentiment.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/28770078/chapters/70963017

Gene woke abruptly, disoriented. He sat up and tried to force his eyes to adjust to the darkness but closed them again when it wasn’t working. There was a weight beside him. A heat, like a human body. He was going to get killed if he couldn’t see. He snapped his eyes open, willed himself to see. His gaze immediately landed on Shelton, sleeping with his mouth slightly ajar. Gene breathed out slowly and tried to calm down. He just kept staring at Shelton. Coaxing himself into the present. He was in New Orleans, with Snafu. With his boyfriend. Gene continued to stare, breathing deeply, until a smile spread on his face. He’d lost his virginity last night. To this man. He’d never felt so sure about anything in his life.

Gene gradually shifted one leg out from under the covers and then the other. He winced; he was sore from being stretched open last night. He tried his best not to wake Snafu as he moved to sit on the edge of the bed, and then stood up. The bed creaked, and Gene turned to ensure Snafu was still asleep. He hadn’t even stirred. Gene walked to the bathroom and relieved himself, then quietly got dressed. Afterwards, he found the pen and paper he’d purchased the day prior. It felt like he’d went shopping a week ago. Time had a way of warping when he was around Snafu. Gene moved to the desk that was situated in a corner of the room and lit the lamp. He glanced over at Snafu, but again, the other man didn’t stir. Gene grabbed a sheet of paper and began to write.

“Dear Greaser,”

Gene smiled. His nickname for Sid.

“I haven’t been gone more than a week or two by the time this letter reaches you, but I wanted to let you know I arrived safely. The journey was long, but nothing compared to the trip through Japan. Louisiana is just like Alabama in a lot of ways. It’s hot. The same sultry fog that hangs in the air here must stretch all the way to Alabama. But different too. There’s lots of lights, sounds, and people. And French! It’s quite a sight. Maybe someday you’ll visit and see what I mean. I hope you’re doing well. I wanted to apologize for barging in on you and Mary like that. And to thank you for taking me to the station. And for the money. I’m tracking what I owe you, and I won’t take no for an answer. But most of all, I wanted to thank you for making sure I got on that train. I found who I was looking for. Things are difficult. Different. But they’re also exciting. So much has happened already. I wish I could share it with you. But perhaps a letter is not the best place for it. I hope to sit down with you someday and tell you everything. I hope-“

Gene hesitated. He had to be careful about what he put in writing. He wasn’t sure he should, or even could, tell Sid the truth about what he was. About what he was doing. Shame washed over him like a warm breeze. He wondered if he should just throw the letter away. Maybe he could never return home now. He wouldn’t be able to bare the rejection from Sid. But he didn’t want to run away. He wasn’t a coward. He wanted to bring Merriell home with him one day. Introduce him to his parents. To Sid. To Ed. Maybe none of them would understand at first, but they loved Gene. They’d want what was best for him. If God could bring him and Snafu together, then maybe there was something to it. Maybe there was a piece of God in all this.

‘So God created humankind in his image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them,’ the bible said time-and-time again.

God had created Gene. Why would he create him if he couldn’t accept him? Gene memorized the scriptures that brought him comfort during his frenzied search for God’s acceptance.

‘So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate,’ Matthew 19:5, ‘Jonathan became one in spirit with David, and he loved him as himself,’ Samuel 18:1, ‘David says of Jonathan: “Your love for me was wonderful, more wonderful than that of women,’ Samuel 1:26.

Gene tenderly tucked these words away. Like precious letters written by someone he had loved and lost. He held them deep in his heart. Buried somewhere. Unable to look at them. But he was ready to take the letters out. Ready to tattoo the words on his skin. If God could accept him, so could his family.

He pressed his pen back to the paper.

“I hope someday when I tell you everything, that you’ll understand. All the best, Gene.” He finished. He moved the paper aside and grabbed another.

‘Dear mom and dad,

I’m sorry I left so abruptly. I hope Sid was able to reach you before you realized I was gone. I don’t ever mean to worry you. I don’t ever mean to cause so many problems. I just need time. I’m in Louisiana now, and I’m feeling hopeful. I think you both know being home was difficult for me. I hope when I return, we can start over. That I can explain everything to you. That you’ll understand,” he found himself writing for the second time. He prayed they’d understand.

If they could feel what Gene felt for Snafu they’d never question his intentions. His state of mind. It was purer than his love for God. Before the war he’d never dream of saying something like that. But he’d changed. God’s role in his life had changed. He had to believe his family could drastically change too. He knew his mother didn’t understand homosexuality. Could tell by the way she talked about men and women. How she always mentioned weddings and grandchildren. How she hoped both Ed and Gene would have lots. Have great wives. As if neither of them could ever want something different. ‘Learn to clean up after yourself now, or your future wife will resent you,’ his mother would say.

Gene just ignored her. His dad would defend them both. “Mary Frank, leave the boys alone. Don’t rush them to grow up, or you’ll be sorry you did.” His dad was always protecting him. He wondered if his dad could sense Gene was different. Wrong inside. His mom would question why Gene wasn’t out chasing girls like Ed was. And Gene would tell her he wanted to wait for the right one. But he wondered if his father caught the lies as they left his lips. If he knew, but never dared to ask.

“I don’t know when I’ll be home,” Gene continued writing. “But I’ll give notice before I do. I love you both. Love, Gene.”

“Whatchya doin’?” Snafu mumbled; voice wrecked with sleep. Gene jumped and banged his knees on the table.

“Jesus Christ, Merriell,” Gene rubbed his knee. Snafu was laughing. “I was writing.”

“You don’t say?” He replied sardonically. He stretched, stood up, and walked over to Gene, still naked as the day he was born. Then bent and kissed him. Lingering, pressing down on his mouth passionately. Gene melted into it. Just as suddenly as it had begun, Snafu broke it and straightened. “You writin’ to all your friends about how good last night was? Make sure you tell ‘em how big I am.”

Gene laughed, but his smile faded. Drifted into a frown. He wanted so badly to bring Merriell home to Mobile. He wanted Merriell to have Gene’s mother and father as his own parents. He wanted his mom and dad to be happy for him. He wanted them to shake Merriell’s hand, hug him, and welcome him as their son. He wanted Sid to accept him. For them to all go fishing together.  He wanted so much.

“What’s goin’ on in that pretty head of yours?” Snafu asked, cautiously bringing his index finger to rub down the bridge of Gene’s nose.

Gene stared blankly ahead as he pondered what question he most needed to ask. “Would you ever come home with me to Mobile?”

Now it was Snafu’s turn to stare blankly. Thinking. He stopped rubbing the length of Gene’s nose. “I’d do it -- for you, but--“ Snafu looked up at the ceiling, contemplating his next words, “It’s dangerous. People don’t take too kindly to what we’re doin’. The world just ain’t like that.” Snafu was watching for Gene’s reaction.

Gene gradually nodded. He was a fool. He was the same fool he’d been before the war. It lit his blood on fire. How could he be so naïve. To think he could just bring Snafu home and parade him around. That everyone would throw a party in Gene’s honor. For finally finding love. For finding peace. He was a damn idiot for thinking everyone would understand. That God was on his side. It wasn’t fair. Why did it matter if he loved a man or a woman? It was love. That should be all that mattered to anyone. Gene sorted both pages he’d written on. Aligned them neatly, then picked them up and promptly tore them in half.

“Eugene,” Snafu tried to still his hands. “What’re you doin’?”

Gene shook off Snafu’s attempt to stop him. He continued to tear the pages until they were just scraps. He dropped the pieces from the air and let them float down, scattered across the table. Just like how he felt inside. He was so stupid. He realized he was crying when one of his tears fell from the tip of his nose and dampened the pile. He was pathetic.

“Eugene….” Snafu tried again. “I didn’t mean to ups-“

“You’re right,” Gene said abruptly. “I wasn’t thinking clearly. They wouldn’t understand. They couldn’t even understand who I was when I arrived home. Why would this be any different?” Gene wiped his face angrily. He was such a child.

“I love you,” Snafu whispered. Gene looked at him. The silence stretched. “I can’t stop saying the wrong thing,” Snafu finally added after the silence became uncomfortable.

“That’s not the wrong thing.” Gene responded. “You mean it?” He felt a bit desperate. The only thing he understood anymore was his love for Snafu. Nothing else in this whole fucked up world made any sense to him.

“More than anything.” Snafu tilted Gene’s face and leaned down to kiss him. Affectionately. Carefully. Like he was made of glass. He was such a fragile thing. He couldn’t stop fuckin’ crying.

“I love you too,” Gene choked on a sob. He tried to smother his tears out by grinding the palm of his hands into his eyes.

“Fuck, Gene, you’re killin’ me. It’s okay. It’s gonna be okay. You and me, we’re gonna be just fine. We don’t even have to stay here. I don’t even fuckin’ like it here. We could pick another state. Go to California. Another country. The fucking wilderness. In some backwards ass country that speaks a language neither of us understands. I don’t know or give a shit. Just please, please stop bein’ so sad. I can’t stand it,”

Gene looked up at Snafu. Gene could see the desperation in his eyes. They were so expressive, even when he didn’t want them to be. “It’s not fuckin’ fair,” Gene said.

“Nothin’s fair, buttercup. That’s life.” Snafu responded. For some reason that angered Gene. He knew life wasn’t fair. He didn’t need to be babied. He’d been through the same war Snafu had. Gene had hardened. One night of bliss wasn’t enough to bring back the boy he’d been. That part of him was dead. He’d made sure of it. His good side only ever got him hurt. It continued to get him hurt.

“I’m not a child,” Gene stood up, bumping Snafu out of the way.

Snafu grabbed his bicep. “I wasn’t saying you were. Don’t be unreasonable.”

Now Gene was pissed. “Fuck you, Merriell.” He pulled his arm out of Snafu’s grasp and headed for the bathroom.

“Gene, for fuck’s sake I’m tryin’a help you.” Snafu followed him.

“Yeah, a lot of good that ever fuckin’ did.” Snafu stopped walking. Gene turned, regretting what he said immediately. Snafu had saved his life. Countless times. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry, that was shitty. I didn’t mean it.”

Snafu didn’t move. He looked angry. Gene went to grab for him, but Snafu turned around and walked away.

“Merriell…Snafu, stop. Stop!” Gene followed him back to the bed where Snafu threw himself down on his back. Snafu grabbed his cigarettes, put one between his lips, and lit it. Gene grabbed it out of his mouth.

“Can I just have one second without you fuckin’ ruinin’ it with your boo-hoo’in bullshit?” Snafu grabbed his cigarette back. Dragged on it and blew the smoke out angrily. As if he couldn’t even enjoy it. It wafted in Gene’s direction.

That was fair. Gene tried to breathe deeply to calm himself. Inhaling smoke as he did so. Gene had sstuck the knife in first, he reminded himself. “Okay,” Gene responded. “I’ll take me and my,” Gene used two fingers in a show of quotation, “boo-hoo-in bullshit” Gene dropped his hands, “And give you some space.”

Snafu stared numbly. Still angry. Gene could see it radiating off him.

“S’fine by me.” Snafu responded curtly.

Gene had never argued with someone while they were naked before. He’d have to remember to write that down as another first. He’d have laughed if he wasn’t afraid it would set Snafu off like a mortar. Snafu’s words had bitten him, but Gene imagined the wound he’d inflicted on Snafu was larger. During the war, Snafu put every ounce of his own sanity into trying to maintain Gene’s. Gene had just crushed it with his boot like a discarded cigarette. Gene bathed, brushed his teeth, shaved, lingered. Analyzed and re-analyzed the entire conversation he’d had with Snafu. Gene wondered the fuck was wrong with him. Snafu was just trying to help. He’d tried to console him. Snafu had mentioned he was always fucking up his own life. Maybe he and Snafu weren’t so different after all. As Gene sat on the bathroom floor, wrapped in a towel, torturing himself about every word and action, there was a knock at the door.

“You dead in there?” Snafu called.

“Would you like me to be?” Gene called back. Snafu opened the door and stared. As he was prone to doing.

“I didn’t kill my own self every day tryin’a save your sorry ass so you could come home and die in a bathroom.” Snafu retorted.

“I’m sorry for what I said. I didn’t mean a lick of it.” Gene stood up and took a step towards Snafu. In return, Snafu took a step towards him. Meeting in the middle.

“Surprisingly enough, I’ve been known to say some shitty things when I’m mad too.” Snafu kissed Gene. It was quick, but it was both a formal apology and an acceptance of Gene’s apology. Snafu moved to the bath and cranked the water. “We gotta be out of here in 20 minutes. Bus leaves at 1300. Figured we’d get food and head there.”

Gene had been so focused on the future he’d forgotten about going to Snafu’s house. While Snafu bathed and dressed back into the same clothes from the day prior, Gene gathered all his belongings. He had everything by the door in record time. It was just another of many skills he’d learned in the marine corps. When someone said, ‘pack your shit we’re moving,’ you packed your shit and moved. He was smoking one of Snafu’s cigarettes when Shelton emerged from the bathroom. He strutted right over to Gene, stole the cigarette out of his hand, and said, “Thanks, babe, you shouldn’t have.” Snafu went to the door and unlatched it, then grabbed several of Gene’s bags.

“You’re such a shit, you know that?” Gene joined in grabbing the bags, then opened the door for Snafu.

“You love it,” Snafu countered.

As they emerged from the room, they locked eyes with the couple who’d stayed in the room directly to the right of theirs. It was just Gene’s luck they had decided to check out at the same time. The woman stopped and stared at them, mouth agape. Gene felt panic rise in his stomach. How much had they heard last night? The couple just continued staring. Then, in true Snafu fashion, he said, “What the fuck’re you lookin’ at? Buncha weirdos.” And walked down the hallway with his cigarette between his lips.

Gene laughed, tried to cover it up, mouthed an ‘I’m sorry’ at them, and then hastily followed Snafu. When Gene caught up to Snafu, he whispered, “They know, don’t they?” Snafu shrugged.

“Who gives a shit?” He repositioned a bag on his arm.

Gene watched him. If anyone else looked at Snafu they’d think he sincerely didn’t give a shit, but Gene wasn’t anyone else. He’d spent so much time watching Snafu as he tried to protect himself from the horrors of war. His jaw clenched; his eyes concerned. He rubbed at the collar of his shirt. Snafu was as worried as Gene was, he was just better at concealing it. If they checked out before the other couple caught up, Gene could at least ensure they wouldn’t know his full name. He picked up the pace, determined to avoid any future backlash. Snafu matched him. Gene managed to check out without incident. The couple had just approached when Gene and Snafu were heading out the door.

Once they were out in the daylight, Snafu darted right towards the bus station. They found a diner on the way, and stopped in. They dropped the bags, both wearing matching red rings around their arms from the weight. They both ordered food as soon as their waiter was available. Gene was starting to feel excited about heading to Snafu’s house. He never dreamed he’d find Snafu, let alone live with him. Live…with his boyfriend. Just ‘his boyfriend’ was enough to make him exhilarated. He remembered what he’d said to Snafu earlier.  

“I’m sorry, about earlier. I got defensive, and it wasn’t fair.” Gene wished he could reach out and grab Snafu’s hand.

Snafu looked up suddenly, surprised. He’d been staring down at the table in thought. “You don’t gotta torture yourself about it. We already apologized.”

“I know, but I don’t want you to think I’m gonna to make a habit out of it.” Gene didn’t want to give him a reason to walk away. Snafu had already successfully moved on once.

“I didn’t think you would, Gene. It’s not a big deal.” Snafu continued to look confused.

Gene sighed. He and Snafu were going to have to work on their communication. Gene tended to let things linger. To itch at his skin until he couldn’t help digging at them. He liked to visit and revisit conversations, thoughts, and actions. Snafu only appeared to think on things for the length the conflict lasted. He wasn’t sure who was right in this situation, but assumed it was probably neither of them.

Their food came, and it quieted them both again. They resumed watching each other. Before he met Snafu, Gene would’ve felt self-conscious having someone watch him while he ate, but he was so used to Shelton watching him he hardly cared.

“What do you do for fun around here? Or did you, I guess.”

“Gambling,” Snafu answered, “Won’t do it anymore though.” Gene wanted to tread carefully. He didn’t want another discussion like the one they’d endured the last time they ate a meal together.

“You get sick of it?” Gene tried.

“The opposite, I’d gamble the pants right off you if I could.” Snafu looked around at the other customers. Probably trying to determine whether anyone was listening to them.

“Always trying to get my pants off,” Gene mumbled under his breath.

Snafu grinned. “Whata’bout you? What’d a sweet, handsome, southern boy like you do back home?”

It donned on Gene he and Snafu had never really talked about their interests. Small talk was almost inconceivable during the war. For a moment, he worried whether he and Snafu would realize they weren’t compatible. He tried to tuck it away, focus on the conversation. “Reading, writing,” Gene felt a sadness tugging at his heart, “I used to hunt with my dad, but…..I’d take Deacon, my dog, out for walks…” He faded. There was so much he took for granted. And now it was gone.

Snafu tried to reel him back in, “Writing what? Like journaling?”

Gene picked at his food. Snafu grabbed a piece of Gene’s toast, took a bite out of it, then threw it down on his plate. Gene glared, grabbed it, and shoved the whole piece in his mouth. “S’mine,” He said around his mouth full of toast.

“Your parents never taught you how to share? Boy, I’m gonna write them a letter. Ask them why they never taught their son any manners.” Snafu gently kicked at Gene’s foot under the table.

Gene threw a balled-up napkin at him. The women at the table next to them glared.

Gene tried to maintain Snafu’s attention before he told the women to ‘mind your own fuckin’ business.’ “Sometimes I’d journal. Sometimes I’d just write stories.” Gene could feel himself blushing. He didn’t know why he felt embarrassed.

“Oh yeah?” Snafu seemed pleasantly surprised, “Can I read it?”

“Well, I mean, I didn’t exactly bring it with me as a gift.” Gene finished his last few bites of food. They’d need to leave promptly if they hoped to catch the bus.

“I know that, ya pain in the ass. I meant when I go home with you.” Snafu said.

Gene looked at him. They’d already decided that was a terrible idea. Snafu grabbed the check while Gene was still mentally exploring what Snafu had insinuated. Snafu paid, and then grabbed his share of Gene’s bags. Gene was still staring.

“Come on, we can philosophize later. Let’s go.” Snafu delicately kicked at Gene’s chair until he stood up and grabbed his bags.

“We’re gonna talk more about this later,” Gene said.

“You got it, dreamboat. Let’s go, please.” Snafu was already walking away. Gene laughed softly and followed him.

They boarded the bus, sat down, and waited for the bus conductor to pass. Gene hurriedly paid for the tickets before Snafu could. Once the bus conductor left them with their stubs, Snafu shoved at Gene. “I was gonna get that.”

“You’ve paid for everything so far! I’m not a freeloader.” Gene reasoned.

“You not interested in a sugar daddy then?” Snafu said, his smile wide and mischievous. Gene quickly glanced around to make sure no one heard, then laughed and shoved Snafu back.

“I already have a daddy I don’t need another one.” He whispered. He couldn’t hide his grin.

“We’ll see ‘bout that. A couple more nights like last night you might be changin’ your mind.” Snafu’s grin managed to widen.

“Shhhh, shut up,” Gene was laughing though, “You’re a scoundrel.”

Snafu, still grinning, reached underneath the bags they’d set between them and grabbed Gene’s hand. He squeezed. Gene smiled fondly and squeezed back. Gene wanted so badly to tell Merriell that he loved him, but they’d taken enough risks for one day. The rest of the trip passed in silence. It wasn’t long before they’d reached their stop. Snafu untangled their hands and grabbed his share of the bags. Gene followed suit. They stepped off the bus and out into Jackson. It was a quaint little town. A couple churches stood within view. Gene wondered if Merriell had ever attended them with his family. Gene tried to imagine Shelton growing up in this town.

“We gotta catch another bus, I live out in the sticks.” Snafu said.

“Ugh,” Gene looked heavenward, “Of course you do. One of us is getting a license as soon as possible.”

“I’m workin’ on it. I’m tryi’na save up money for it first.” Snafu drawled.

Another bus ride completed, and they were very much ‘in the sticks.’ They stepped off the bus and onto a long dirt driveway. They were surrounded by highway and trees. When Gene imagined Snafu growing up, he always imagined him in the city. Gene wasn’t sure why. It surprised him to know Snafu had grown up so isolated from the rest of the world. It strengthened Gene’s remorse for Shelton’s parents being gone. Maybe Snafu really didn’t have anyone else now. He followed Snafu up the driveway until a two-story brick house came into view. There was an old beat up barn off to the left. The front porch looked a bit weathered as well. When Gene started ascending the stairs they creaked awfully. He winced.

“The good news is no one’s gonna sneak up on us here.” Snafu joked. Gene laughed, and waited as Snafu unlocked the door and let Gene in. Gene stepped inside and was surprised by the bare walls. Anyone could’ve lived in this house. There was nothing tying Snafu to it. Gene thought of his own home, with family pictures everywhere you glanced. Or at least decorations and paintings strewn about. Even Gene’s bedroom had more pictures than the several rooms Gene could glance from where he was standing. His house in Mobile was lived in. Lively. Loving. This house was home to no one. Gene’s sadness for Snafu grew.

Snafu rubbed at his collar, “You wishin’ we was back at the hotel instead?” He asked. He tried to sound playful.

Gene turned to look at Snafu. His sadness spread until he couldn’t stand it anymore. Gene dropped his bags and threw his arms around Snafu, causing Snafu’s bags to drop as well. Gene hugged him, hard. Snafu must’ve been surprised because it took him several moments to reciprocate. Gene kissed him, hard. Tangling his fingers in Snafu’s curls. Gene tried to pour every ounce of love that he held for Merriell into this kiss. Tried to fill him up with it. Snafu moaned. Gene pulled Snafu along with him until he could sit him down in one of the kitchen chairs. Gene hit his knees and started unbuttoning Snafu’s pants.

“Jesus christ, Eugene.” Snafu chuckled. “I was gonna show you around first before we christened the place.”

Gene smiled and pulled Snafu’s pants and shorts down as Snafu lifted his hips. Gene wasted no time taking Snafu in his mouth. Swirling his tongue over the head like he did the night before. Snafu groaned loudly, no reason for them to be chaste anymore. Gene tried not to overthink this. It was a blowjob for heaven’s sake, how could you mess that up? He flattened his cheeks and held his breath, pushing Snafu all the way to the back of his throat and holding him there. 1-2-3….Gene pulled off and let out the breath he’d been holding. Snafu fisted his hands in Gene’s hair and gently pushed Gene’s head back down. Gene sucked in air through his nose again and obliged. After Merriell held him in place for several seconds, he released his hold on Gene so he could come up for air. Gene blew the air back out of his nose. They repeated their dance together. Shelton steering Gene, Gene giving him whatever he asked for. Gene unbuttoned his pants, dragged them down with one hand, then took his own cock in his fist. Snafu’s eyes were instantly on Gene’s hand. Snafu released his hold on him and knocked Gene’s hand away. He leaned forward, spit into his palm, and wrapped it around Gene’s cock. Meanwhile, Gene maintained the pace Snafu had set for him before he’d released his hold on Gene’s hair.

“Gonna come, cher….You don’t gotta—” Gene moaned and released Snafu’s cock from his mouth until only the head remained between his lips. Gene wrapped his fist around the base. He resumed swirling his tongue. Snafu’s hand stilled on Gene’s cock as he got lost in the feeling of his own orgasm building. He was moaning loudly. Gene matched Snafu’s moans, spurring him on. Eventually, Gene felt heat hit his tongue and he swallowed. Took everything Snafu had to give him. Continued swirling his tongue until Snafu twitched from being overstimulated. Gene released him and sat back on his feet with his knees bent. Snafu sat there breathing deeply, then wiped his face and propelled himself out of the chair and onto the floor with Gene. It was no easy task when Snafu’s pants were still around his thighs. Gene chuckled and laid on his back.

“Wanna try something,” Snafu mumbled and tugged Gene’s own pants and shorts down his thighs. Then Snafu shoved at Gene until he rolled over. Gene stared at the front door, waiting for whatever Snafu had planned. Snafu took his own shirt off and laid it under Gene’s hips. Then Gene felt the first kiss on his left ass cheek. Gene stilled. Snafu continued pressing sloppy kisses to him. “You gotta learn to relax, Eugene. I’m not gonna hurt you. Would never hurt you,” he blew air where he had just planted a particularly wet kiss, then licked over it.

Gene panted, “Not worried you’re gonna hurt me. Worried I’m gonna make the most embarrassing noise you ever heard.”

Snafu snickered, “I like ‘em. They’re hot.” He spread Gene open and proceeded to fuck Gene with his tongue. Gene did, in fact, make a horribly embarrassing noise. And a loud one. “S’right, sweetheart, tell me all about how it feels.”

Gene was rolling his hips to meet Snafu’s tongue. Gene couldn’t talk, even if Snafu had begged him to. He just kept making loud whimpering noises. Snafu snaked a hand around and grabbed Gene’s cock. Gene came embarrassingly fast, still rolling his hips. Snafu maintained his hold on Gene’s cock until it softened. He kissed his way up Gene’s back, lifting Gene’s shirt as he went. Once Gene finally calmed down, he was once again struck by the act he’d done in front of God. He was going to have to do a hell of a lot of praying to make up for any of this. He laughed to himself.

“Whatchya laughin’ at now?” Snafu asked him. Rubbing his back.

“Us. I was a virgin not even 24 hours ago. Now I’m lying on the floor about three steps into your house with my pants around my thighs, come on your shirt, and we just did the most unspeakable thing I’ve ever heard of in my life.” Gene rubbed his forehead back and forth on his folded arms, shaking his head in disbelief.

Snafu slapped Gene’s ass with a satisfyingly loud smack then got up on his knees. Snafu yanked his pants back up and buttoned them. “We’re really cookin’ with gas now, Genie. It’s only gonna get better from here.”

Gene chuckled, “I’m gonna be dead before long. Might as well start digging a hole for me in the backyard.” Gene sat up and pulled his own pants and shorts up as he went. “You gonna give me that tour now?”

[carewyncromwell]

5, 13, and 20 for the potter asks?

Pro or anti Marauders?

Pro overall, but let’s break this down by characters --

Remus Lupin is my favorite male character in the entire book series. He not only reminded me of my best teachers growing up, but I felt so, so much for him as a character too. I always felt kind of marginalized and different from my peers growing up, so it’s kind of unsurprising that I’ve had a soft spot for “outcast” characters since I was very little, and Remus is no exception. I completely understood why his friends meant so much to him and therefore felt SO much for him that, in the end, he had to lose all three of them and end up alone. Even his flaws, showcased best in the Snape’s Worst Memory chapter of OOTP and especially in Deathly Hallows, only serve to make him more real and human -- it broke my heart when he considered leaving Tonks and Teddy to help the Trio with their Horcrux hunt, but Remus wanting to “bury himself in his work” (which, honestly, this was -- he was a member of the Order, after all!) rather than face his worst fear of possibly dooming another person (namely, his son) to live a life like his made perfect sense with the characterization established, however horrible and wrong of a choice it was. It made me side with Harry so much in scolding Remus, yet I also felt compassion for the feelings behind Remus’s initial impulse. And of course, I was so proud of him when he overcame that fear and stood by Tonks and got to know his son before he died. I’m still not over the fact that my bb Remus had to die, AUUUUUGH, he and Sirius and Harry should’ve lived together as one happy makeshift family togetherrrrr. DX

Peter Pettigrew...that bloody rat. >> I’m sure just about everyone feels a lot of justified resentment toward Peter for what he did to the Potters, and I definitely agree with that sentiment...but at the same time, there’s still a part of me that finds him very interesting. Mainly because...I’d love to see him at his best, now that we’ve seen him at his worst! He was a Marauder, same as Sirius, Remus, and James, and we should never forget that -- he might have been a bit of a tag-along, but none of the other three, Lily, or anyone else thought that Peter would ever have been the type to turn on his friends. McGonagall disparaged Peter for his magical talent, but she openly grieved for him when she thought Sirius had killed him. Everyone was ready to believe Sirius -- who clearly adored James -- could be the traitor, before suspecting Peter. Sirius even suspected Remus before Peter...and this is when their connection in the books is so strong that HP fans have shipped Wolfstar since POA was first published back in 1999! Even when you read the books, you can see flickers of remorse in Peter at points, if you’re reading carefully. In Goblet of Fire, Peter seems noticeably uncomfortable around the rest of Voldemort’s supporters -- his efforts to bring Voldemort back to his body really seem to be out of obligation rather than any kind of enthusiasm. And of course, as we see in Deathly Hallows, Peter even as a Death Eater still retains enough honor to hesitate when Harry reminds him that he owes him his life. Gryffindor house does preach chivalry as well as courage, and in a twisted way, one could read Peter’s “loyalty” to Voldemort not just being about desperation as his friends now want nothing to do with him, but also because Peter’s standing by the choice he made...not unlike how Percy stood by the Ministry as long as he did, rather than by his family. This doesn’t justify what Peter did at all -- he is a despicable coward who destroyed so many lives and is responsible for bringing back the Dark Wizard whose return resulted in even more deaths -- but it does give his characterization as a villain interesting nuance. There’s a well-established internal logic to how Peter behaves, one I would frankly LOVE to see more of in a future Marauders-centric property.

Sirius is arguably the most polarizing of the Marauders, but honestly? I love him to pieces. He is a very, VERY flawed character -- he’s got a real mean streak, a hot temper, and more aggression than the average person. Him encouraging Snape to “go after Remus” was an indisputably terrible, stupid, callous thing to do, not just because of the endangerment to Snape’s life, but the flagrant betrayal of Remus’s friendship. The way Sirius treated Kreacher was completely uncalled for, regardless of how much the elf reminded him of his terrible home life. Sirius also can be really immature and can get really surly and passive-aggressive when he’s upset. But despite all of this, I love Sirius anyway. In a lot of ways, Sirius reminds me of my father, who I also love a lot despite his many flaws. Sirius lacks empathy for those different from him, but he’s also the only member of his immediate family who rejected the idea of pureblood superiority and fought in the Order of the Phoenix against Voldemort. Sirius was a bully and even as an adult could be incredibly petty and mean-spirited, but he also was the first person in Harry’s life who really felt like family to him -- who he could write to for help when he was sad, afraid, or insecure. Sirius was a hot-tempered, rash person who rarely thought through the consequences of his actions, but he also would’ve done absolutely anything to protect the people he loved. He without question loved James, Lily, and Harry more than his own life. Despite being raised in a cold, hate-filled, prejudiced, unaffectionate, abusive home, Sirius understood unconditional love, and he understood his godson in a way no one else could, not just because he was such close friends with the parents he’d lost at such a young age, but because he’d lived Harry’s experience as a neglected, unloved child himself.

And now we come to the often maligned James Potter. Honestly, this guy gets such a bad rap in the fandom, almost exclusively based on Snape’s memories, and I don’t think it’s really fair. Snape is really the only person who has a sour image of James, and even if we disregard the testimonials of fellow Marauders like Sirius and Remus, people like McGonagall, Dumbledore, Mad-Eye Moody, and even Cornelius Fudge had nothing but nice things to say about James, and those people don’t have reason to speak well of James at Snape’s expense. And of course, even Snape’s perceptions are bound to have their own slant to them. Pensieve memories are just that: memories. A Pensieve is not a pocket dimension that perfectly recreates the past, hence why Slughorn was able to badly modify his memory, Hokey the house elf’s memories were tampered with by Riddle, and even in Snape’s own memory, we follow Snape throughout the memory and we’re only able to hear what the Marauders are saying because he was close by. And if we judge James solely based on his no-doubt worst moment in Snape’s Worst Memory, we’re bound to get an incomplete picture -- just as we did for Hagrid, after seeing Tom Riddle’s memory of him confronting Hagrid for supposedly opening the Chamber of Secrets. Would we judge Harry solely for Malfoy’s recollection of the Sectumsempra incident, or Hermione solely for Marietta’s recollection of the time Hermione hexed her face to read “SNEAK” across it? Of course not. James was a bully and what he did in Snape’s Worst Memory was no doubt horrible -- but this is also a young man who without hesitation gave Sirius a home after he ran away from his terrible family, who supported Remus financially when he couldn’t find work, and who selflessly put himself between Voldemort and his family just to give them a chance to escape, even though he didn’t even have his wand on him. I would frankly love to learn more about James and see more of the arc he must’ve gone through as a character for someone like Lily to have fallen in love with him and for people like Remus and Sirius to feel such strong platonic love for him themselves, if a Marauders-centric property was ever created.

Who was the bravest character in Harry Potter and why?

Oh gosh...hm...that is a real challenge. There are a lot of very brave characters! Harry, Ron, Hermione, Remus, Sirius, McGonagall, Hagrid, Dobby, Cedric...but I think I’m going to nominate Neville. While Hogwarts was taken over by Snape and the Carrows and the students were no doubt being brainwashed a la the Hitler Youth to regurgitate blood-purist talking points rather than learning anything that could defend themselves against the Dark Arts or that was even remotely true about Muggles, Neville decided to face that undeniable hopelessness -- worsened all the more by the students’ lack of independence and freedom while being housed in the castle’s walls without their families and the threat of losing both their families and all hope for a future constantly dangled over their heads -- head-on and reform Dumbledore’s Army with Ginny and Luna to stand against it. Then, even as his group’s members got picked off one by one and were forced to hide in the Room of Requirement, he stuck to his guns and kept resisting because he knew -- as a Pureblood -- he was in a position he could use to fight for others and wasn’t afraid to stand up for those who couldn’t stand up for themselves and others. It was only when his grandmother was forced to flee and the Carrows realized that Neville was too much of a threat to keep in check that he went into hiding himself. Then, when everyone thought Harry was dead and many others would’ve despaired, Neville fearlessly and fiercely stuck both by Harry, his parents’ memory, and his own convictions and refused Voldemort’s offer to join him, even keeping his head enough after getting burned by the flaming Sorting Hat to fulfill his promise to Harry and kill Nagini. And this was the kid who people said shouldn’t have been Sorted into Gryffindor at all, in his first year! What a beautiful transformation.

Favourite Death Eater?

*cringes* Mmm...well, character-wise, I’d say I’ve always found Lucius a very compelling character, in the books. The Malfoy family in general struck me as interesting anti-villains, since they are indisputably unpleasant, prejudiced, awful people, but their one silver lining to me is how deeply and sincerely they love each other. That aspect is really lost in movie!Lucius, since the films try to portray him much more two-dimensionally bad and that interpretation has since colored the fandom’s view of Lucius as an abusive father when there is NO textual evidence of that in the books. And I kind of find it a shame, because as much as I adore Jason Isaacs in his role, it did serve to make Lucius a bit less complex and interesting in the films than he was in the books. Admittedly as well I have a bit more of a soft spot for Lucius after taking on the challenge of writing the guy and his family a redemption arc in my way-too-long AU fic Harry Potter and the Lack of Lamb Sauce. XD

HP Ask!

[emileeknow]

Infiltration - Part 1

Paring : Reader x Mafia!Doyoung

Genre: Angst + fluff  |  Words : 5K

Warnings :  Mentions of illegal activity (drugs/weapons) Mentions/Descriptions of Violence. Abusive language directed towards reader.

-

NCT. 

The only mafia group that was superior to your own. Your boss was determined to take them down, but they were good, too smart to infiltrate and too large to eliminate completely. They had subunits across the country and there were rumours of them having a team in China.

Your boss Mr Kim, you still didn’t know his actual name, had been trying to find a way to get a man on the inside for months but to no avail. You had also been thinking.

Running a club gave you a surprising amount of time to think. When Mr kim had approved your proposal of a club that multiple gangs could go to, he probably thought you would have a lot more work on your hands, but you didn’t really have that many issues.

The club had been your idea and it serves its purpose. It was ‘supposedly’ independent of all gangs. No one knew it was linked to the gang, not even the gang itself. The dancers you employed and the security staff all answer to you. Nobody except a select few knew who you answered to, so no one suspected you were a member of SVT.

SVT was one of the larger gangs, but only a select few operated undercover in the club. When the other members would come in, they would pretend not to know the undercover team as anyone more than workers there to serve them, as to not arouse the suspicions of the other patrons, who would likely belong to rival gangs.

The dancers were good at their jobs, and you paid them well, made sure to look out for them and in return they told you everything their customers told them. It was amazing what secrets men would spill with the slightest glimpse of skin. You had a large variety of dancers under your control, you could cater to many tastes which is what made your club so popular.

Most of your workers don’t know about the gang, they think that they just have to ‘keep tabs on all the gangs so we can ensure a peaceful business’ which wasn’t technically a lie.

Only you, Seungcheol, Mingyu and Mr Kim knew the clubs real purpose, which is what made it the perfect operation. If no one knew what they were actually doing, they are honest and therefore not suspicious to outsiders.

The club was a place for rival gang members to meet with each other for negotiations, they thought of  it as neutral territory, no one suspected that you were watching and feeding information back to one of the largest gangs in the country.

You had to be selective with what you returned to your superior, if the gang started acting on all leads it would become suspicious. The clubs main purpose, was to fund the gang and keep an ear to the ground on other gang business, make sure no one was plotting anything against SVT.

Most of the time the information was just some gun deals or drug imports. Nice to know, but nothing of immense value to the group.

Despite this you were always on the lookout for a lead that would reap big rewards for the gang. Until then you were quite happy for the change of scenery from field missions.

You enjoyed being out in the field, but after your last mission and the toll it took on you physically, you needed time to rest. You had been resting for the past few months and were itching for your net to catch something bigger than a minor drug deal.

That's why, when you were watching the CCTV in your office and saw that three members of NCT had walked in and occupied a table at the back of the club, your eyes glued themselves to the screen.

You knew all of their faces.

After all your entire business was dealing in information. You had done your research on SVT’s main rivals. So there was no doubt in your mind that the men on the screen were Johnny, Jaehyun and Doyoung.

The three were high up in NCT’s rank, not at the top but high enough for them to be worth your time.

You quickly turned on the mic that was hidden in the wall of their booth, eager to listen in on this conversation.

-

“Don’t look at me like that Doyoung?”

“I don’t see why we had to come here” Doyoung sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. He was looking at the table, his gaze so intense it could burn hole in the center.

“Well, get used to it, if I have to stay in the area for some stupid stakeout, I’m going to stay somewhere I can enjoy myself” Johnny states, relaxing into the soft leather seat.

“We have our own club you can go to whenever you want” Doyoung states.

“Yeah on the other side of the city, this one is not gang controlled so what’s the problem. Anyway you hate our club”

“I hate all clubs” Doyoung rolls his eyes before walking over to the bar.

Jaehyun and Johnny turned their attention to the stage, watching intently as the dancers performed. They didn’t seem to be saying much so you turned your attention to Doyoung who had  moved over to sit at the otherwise empty bar. It was like he was trying not to look at any of the women who were parading round with little clothes on. You noted he didn’t seem interested in any of the shirtless waiters either.

When Stephanie was serving him his drink he was looking anywhere but her body.

It was an unusual sight to see. The men that came in here were usually desperate to give the girls their undivided attention but Doyoung looked like he wanted to look anywhere else.

When Stephanie handed him his drink his eyes did not once stray from her face to her chest. She had a beautiful figure, one most men would drool over. Which is why Doyoung’s reluctance to look at it intrigued you.

You knew that he had never been seen to be with a woman, unless he was keeping them hidden from the gang scene. Given the industry you were in it wouldn’t surprise you. Having outsiders you cared about put them in danger.

You knew women threw themselves at him all the time with the intention of sleeping with him, however he would ignore all of them. Maybe he was just traditional or maybe he wasn’t interested in sex, which was why he hated strip clubs like yours.

It got you thinking. Maybe he didn’t like the clubs because the stipulation was that they were abusive to women. The girls were trapped in contracts that forced them to display their bodies for next to none of the money they bring in. You knew NCT’s club worked under that business model. It was the case for most of the clubs in the city, but not yours.

Your girls are free to leave whenever they want and you don’t specify the outfits they wear. While most chose to stick to fancy lingerie sets of bras and panties, some of your girls wore corsets that covered a little more. You wanted them to be comfortable and dance because they wanted to, not because their fathers owed money, or they witnessed the wrong thing.

Although Doyoung didn’t need to know that.

Maybe he was too gentlemanly for his perception of strip clubs, maybe he had a girlfriend hidden away. Or maybe, he just wasn't attracted to women, which was fine but for the plan you were formulating in your mind, you were hoping for the first option. As you put together the puzzle pieces in your mind, it dawned on you that this could be your chance to get close to NCT.

You called Seungcheol into your office.

He was your stand in. To the outside eyes of your patrons he was the one in charge. You usually monitored the night from your office. All your employees knew you were in charge, but you had come to the decision to have Seungcheol be the frontman.

Gang Members were more likely to respect him than they were you. You didn’t exactly look the most intimidating most of the time. Although your skills meant you could be quite deadly if you wished.

When he walked the floor he had a stern look of someone not to be messed with. He was big on security, and quick to jump in if one of the girls was being troubled.

-

“I have an idea about how to infiltrate NCT” you start once he had shut the door.

“What is it?” He looks intrigued as he goes to sit on the couch in front of your desk.

“Doyoung”

“The guy sat at the bar who has shown no interest in any of the girls?” he laughs “They don’t work on him”  

“Exactly” you smile

“I’m confused”

“He sees this place to be the typical club, a seedy place that exploits women into making more money for rich men”

“How does that help seduce him?”

“We aren't going to seduce him. At least not in the conventional way”

“He’ll be suspicious of anyone trying to get close to him.” Seungcheol continued to look at you with a confused expression, unsure of where you could possibly be going with this.

“So we get him to get close to me”

“How?”

“By saving me from this club, after all I am a mere damsel in distress”  you pout making your eyes look as big and innocent as possible as if to prove your point. You relax your face before continuing “Nobody here has seen me, they don’t know who I am. I will stay behind the bar and put on an act, even if he’s not looking he will hear what is going on.” You start to think out loud as the plan formulates more clearly in your mind.

“I need you to sell the asshole boss thing. Not all at once though, it needs to be discreet to the rest of the club, since we have regulars in tonight, but obvious to him. He needs to think that I am trapped here against my will. Switch the mic on the bar so that we can keep our stories straight. I heard they are staking out a shop over the road. So we have one, possibly two nights to plant this seed. If he takes the bait we can move from there. ”

“And if he doesn’t bite?”

“Then we haven’t lost anything. He doesn’t know about the gang or that this was a plan, it just meant I was wrong about his whole traditional gentleman vibe”

“Okay” Seungcheol agreed. Not that he had a choice. You were the boss after all.

You walk over to the costume wardrobe pulling out a red and black corset with a small lace skirt attached. The skirt came to above mid thigh but with the girls working tonight you would easily be wearing the most reserved outfit. You walk behind the screen so that Seungcheol couldn’t see you change.

“We need to move now. My character. Shy, insecure about my body but I've been forced to wear this corset that I find too revealing. I have to work behind the bar because we are short staffed. You made me wear the corset to hide my ‘un-appealing to the eye body’. I am usually a cleaner. You took me in because my father was a drug addict and needed the money. He disappeared before he repaid his debts so now i’m stuck here”

You walk around, now dressed in your outfit for the evening. You pull on some tights and some heels and make your way to the door.

“Message the bar ‘code blue’. Stephanie can go home for the day. When Mingyu arrives for his shift tell him he’s acting tonight, get him to come over and order a drink from me, make him be an asshole about it, then he can hang around the front for a bit then leave to monitor the CCTV.”

Seungcheol nods in understanding.

The two of you leave the office and walk downstairs into the private hallway. Seungcheol takes out his phone and sends a message to the till on the bar. All of the staff know the routines and codes. Mingyu had originally assigned more inventive code names but everyone kept getting confused so reluctantly he had opted for the colour system.

You look at the CCTV monitor on the wall.  You see Stephanie looking at the screen of the till. She types some stuff in and closes the till up. Then she wipes the counter quickly as to look like she is just about to leave. Finally she naturally leaves the bar.

Doyoung doesn’t notice, not looking up from his phone the entire time. There was no doubt that they were staking out one of the nearby buildings from inside the club. It seemed like Doyoung was the only one doing the actual monitoring, as the other two seemed to have their attention focused elsewhere.

The hallway you were standing in had a door that lead to behind the bar. So you knew that once you opened it he would be able to hear you despite the music that filled the club. It tended to be quieter towards the back of the club where the bar was.

“It’s now or never” Seungcheol nods to you. His hand grips the handle as he opens the door.

-

“I can’t I’ve never done it before” your voice panicked.

“If I had any other option I wouldn’t put you out there, your figure is hardly going to entice any customers, but we are short and at least behind the bar they can’t see so much of you.” disgust fills his voice.

“Okay” you make your voice small.

You hunch your shoulders over and shuffle out the door to behind the bar. You walk over to the till, being sure not to look up from the floor. Once you reach the till you make sure to push a few buttons that made it look like you didn’t know how to use it properly.

You continued to look at the floor as you held onto the skirt of your corset, trying to pull it down as much as you could.

You could feel Doyoung’s eyes on you,but you didn't look at him.

This could work if you played it right.

-

“Excuse me” Mingyu’s voice was almost unrecognisable in his condescending tone. 

Mingyu liked playing this role, sometimes a little too much. You hoped for the sake of the operation that he didn’t overdo it. He was usually security, but whenever you needed someone to act like an asshole customer, he was your man.

You timidly looked up at him.

“S-sorry what can I get you?” your eyes dart around, making sure not to look him in the eyes.  

“Whiskey” he grumbles.

You nod before grabbing a glass with shaking hands and pouring his drink. You can hear the bottle clinking against the glass as your hands trembled, you made sure to spill some on the counter for good measure.

“For Fuck sake” Mingyu groans, rolling his eyes and tapping his fingers against the bar impatiently.

You give him his drink, he hands you the money, which you drop on the floor before hastily picking it up and putting it in the till. Mingyu takes his drink and walks past Doyoung, murmuring something to himself about how the club must be taking in strays of the street nowadays.

You take the cloth from the sink and begin wiping down the counters. You could feel his eyes on you the whole time. You had to choose the right moment to engage with him. This operation depends on it.

“Excuse me” you hear a soft voice. They were the same words but they sounded completely different coming from him. Doyoung’s voice was hesitant, as if you were a small animal that if he spoke too loud, would get frightened and run away.  

This plan could work.

-

Doyoung’s POV

“Excuse me” I say softly  

For the first time since she came to the bar she looked at me. Her eyes did nothing to hide her fear.

“Y-yes” she stutters.

“Could I have another glass of wine please?”

She nods her head, grabbing another wine class and pouring me a glass of white wine.

I don’t even like white wine. But I still thanked her once she gave it to me.

“Do you usually work at the bar?”

She shakes her head “I’m a cleaner but we are short staffed tonight, so here I am” she smiles sadly.

She goes back to cleaning the sides, it seemed to comfort her. Her arms were not trembling as much as she ran the cloth over the marble counter. The bar was already spotless but she still kept cleaning.

She kept looking over to the side to one of the corridors with a worried expression. A quick look and I saw the owner leaning against the wall. She was clearly trying to keep herself busy, stacking glasses and cleaning the sides, stopping every so often to adjust her corset and pull her skirt down. She looked as if she could not be more uncomfortable. The sight alone was heartbreaking.

I continued to drink the wine that she had given me. It tasted horrible but I pressed on. She had forgotten to charge me for it anyway.

She didn’t look like she wanted to talk. She looked like she wanted her shift to be over so she could go home and crawl inside a blanket. I kept watching her for a while, completely neglecting the stakeout I was meant to be monitoring. I’m sure Yuta could handle it on his own from the van around the corner

She would serve the customers that came to the bar, which were not many. Most of them were too engrossed in the ‘entertainment’ to bother to get their own drinks. Most of them were civil towards her but were clearly annoyed by her inexperience, shy persona and the fact that her cleavage was not on full display for them to gawk at.

I wonder how she ended up here.

She said she was a cleaner, which certainly isn’t the most glamorous of jobs but judging by how uncomfortable she is in her current attire, it seems she would much prefer to be cleaning the bathroom. She seemed so out of place here. A shy innocent girl stood behind the bar of a strip club.

A loud crash interrupted my thoughts.

“Shit” I hear her curse to herself.

I look over the bar, there is glass everywhere, the remains of several wine glasses, shattered on the floor.

She panickedly looked over to the corridor.  Eyes widening as she sees her boss walking towards her at a brisk pace.

“For fuck sake. What do you think you are doing you stupid bitch?” he whisper shouts as he approaches her

“Sorry. I’m so sorry” she apologises frantically to him as he marches around the bar. She flinches away, trying to get as far away as possible from him without causing a scene. “You are so fucking useless. Clean this shit up. You’re paying for the damages.”

“Yes sir. Sorry sir”  she bows her head submissively.

The man turns to me “I’m sorry for her incompetence and her appearance. We were desperate for staff tonight. I hope you understand.” he bows his head to me.

Scumbag.

Once he had disappeared. She bent down to start cleaning up the mess.

I don’t know what came over me but before I knew it I was behind the bar helping her pick glass shards off the floor and put them in the bucket.

“You should be careful of your feet” I warn as I notice her heels, they were black and consisted of lots of straps. Her feet were exposed, and the shoes clearly didn’t fit her properly. She was no doubt made to wear them at the last minute.

“You don’t need to help me sir. Cleaning is one thing I can do” she smiles sadly to herself as she grabs a dustpan and begins sweeping up the smaller shards of glass.

“I want to help” I smile. For the first time this evening she looks at my face properly, not a subtle glance then nervously averting her eyes. Instead she looked at me and the fear in her eyes seemed to disappear.  Being this close to her, I noticed the soft features of her face. Her smooth skin and her beautiful eyes. She deserved so much better than this shitty place.

“Thank you.”She smiles appreciatively.

“You’re not like the guys the girls tell me stories about”  she mutters to herself, focusing on the floor.

“Thank you.”

Her eyes widened as she realised I had heard her. Her expression was cute.

“You’re not like most of the girls here either” I smile.

“I know” she mutters sadly, pulling her skirt down again and attempting to hide her face with her hair and looked towards the floor yet again.

“Hey.” I say to get her attention.

She looks up at me. “I meant it as a compliment” I smile, pushing her hair away from her face. She seemed confused by the action but didn’t shy away from it.

Once the floor was clear I stood up, holding out my hand to help her stand. She took it, stumbling slightly in her heels. I steadied her, letting her go when I was sure she had caught her footing. She backs away from me, going to wash her hands in the sink.

I return to my seat at the bar. Thinking over the previous events.

I wasn’t sure how I was feeling. Women never seem to catch my attention eventhough most of the time it is what they desperately crave. Although this woman seems like she would rather have nobody’s attention, yet she has complete control over mine.

“What is your name?” I find myself asking

“Y/N” she mutters.

“Why do you work here Y/N?”

She sighs “My father was a drug addict. He borrowed money from the owner and couldn’t pay it back. My father left the country to escape his debts. Mr Choi found me and told me I had to work off what my father owed him. He said I could clean since I would deter customers if I were front of house. At least my father only owed money to him and not some gang or something. It could be worse” she says dismissively.

I was about to ask her more questions when another woman walked over to the bar.

“Y/N what are you doing out here?” she asks in concern.

“We were short so I had to cover” she sighs.

“Okay, I’ll take the bar now you can go. I think Mr Choi wants to see you.”

“Ok.Thank you” she hugs the woman, clearly relieved she doesn’t have to stay behind the bar any longer. She leaves the bar and begins to walk reluctantly over to the corridor.

“Y/N wait” I shout. Following her quickly. I caught up to her as she turns to look at me in confusion.

“I want to speak to your boss”

“W-why” she mutters nervously.

“I just need to speak to him”

“Oh, okay”  she says nervously leading me to the door on the far end of the corridor.

She knocks gently.

“Come in” I hear his gruff voice from inside.

She timidly pushes the door open, before she can enter I step in front of her. She looks at me in confusion. “Wait here” I enter the room shutting the door behind me.

“Who are you?” the man behind the desk stands up. Clearly surprised to see me.

“I have come to talk about Y/N”

“I am terribly sorry if she has caused you any trouble, rest assured she will be disciplined accordingly”

I scrunch my face up in disgust.

“That is not what I came to talk about”

He looks confused for a second.

“How much does her father owe you?”

“Her remaining total is $20,000. Why?”

“I’m paying it for her”

“What? Why would you do that? I must say she is a frigid bitch. If it’s a woman you’re after I recommend choosing another one” he chuckles.

He barely had time to blink before I was in front of him with my hand around his throat.

“Now you listen here. You will never talk about her in such a way again” I tighten the grip on his neck. He squirms as he struggles for breath.

“I will pay you what you are owed and I will be taking her with me. If you so much as look in her direction again I will not hesitate to kill you.”

The man struggles against me, desperately trying to break free, but it was futile for him

“Am I understood?”  I ask sternly

He nods his head frantically as he claws at my hands.

I let him go. He crumples to the floor, gasping heavily.

“I will send a colleague with your payment tomorrow. She is leaving tonight and never coming back.”  I leave him on the floor as I walk out of the room.

-

She is sitting leaning against the wall opposite the door in front of me as I shut the door once again.

“Did you hear all that?” I ask.

“No. Mr Choi doesn't like it when people listen to his private conversations”

I hold my hand out to help her stand. She gladly takes it and pushes herself up off the floor.

“You’re free” I smile at her.

“What?” She looks at me with so much confusion on her face.

“You don’t owe him anything anymore. You can leave here tonight and never come back.” I explain.

“What do you mean?”

“I’ve paid off your debt”

“But why would you do that?”

“You deserve better than this place”

She looks around, her eyebrows scrunching as she tries to process the information. I feel my phone ringing in my back pocket. Looking at the screen. 

Johnny.

“Hello” I sigh 

“Where are you? we have to get back to the van” Johnnys voice sounds urgent

“I’ll meet you there”

“Hurry up or Yuta will get annoyed and you know he will tell Taeyong that we left the van”

I hang up

“I have to leave now. Get your things and go home” I take out a pen from my jacket pocket. “Here is my number call me tomorrow okay” I write my personal number down on the soft skin of her hand.

“O-Okay” she nods. I offer her a small smile, squeezing her hand in reassurance before turning to walk away.

“W-Wait” she calls. I turn back. She had hardly spoken more than a mumble all night so her voice took me by surprise.

“I don’t even know your name”

“Doyoung”  I call back to her with a smile.

-

Y/N’s pov

I stared in disbelief as he walked away. After a few minutes the door in front of me opened. Seungcheol leant against the doorway with a sly smirk on his face. “They’ve left the building”

I follow him into his office chuckling as I take a seat on the sofa. “The plan was much more effective than I could imagine.”

“Where do we go from here?”  he asks.

“I can’t be here too much longer, no doubt he’s keeping an eye out for me leaving. I also can’t come back here, it would be too suspicious. For now you’re in charge of the club. I’ll call Mr Kim once I get home and tell him what is going on. ”

“Ok, be sure to look after yourself.” Seungcheol joins me on the sofa wrapping his arms around me tightly. “I’ll miss you”

“Me too.”  I smiled sadly, gently tracing the red marks that were dominantly present around his neck. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I'm fine. The fucker has a tight grip on him though”  He holds me for a moment before letting me go.

I go back to my office, changing quickly into a pair of jeans, a shirt and a jacket before grabbing my purse and phone and leaving the club.

I look around the street outside the back entrance to the club. I see a grey van parked by the side of the road. I pretend not to notice it as I walk past. Knowing that Doyoung was probably watching from there. 

Instead I kept my head down and walked quickly. As it was incredibly late and not safe for a woman to be walking home on her own. So I pretended I wasn’t trained and highly lethal in hand to hand combat and shuffled home at a brisk pace with my phone held tightly in my hands.

-

After showering and climbing into bed I grab my phone and call Mr Kim.

“Yes” I hear his cold voice on the other side of the line. Mr Kim was never one for unnecessary chit chat.

“Hello Mr Kim. I have an update on infiltrating NCT”

“And what is that?” for the first time since I met the elusive leader, his voice seemed to have some sort of interest in it.

“Three members entered the club today sir. With the help of Seungcheol I have managed to get Kim Doyoung to approach me. He believes he has saved me from my life of torment at the hands of Seungcheol, I am to call him tomorrow.”

“Interesting. He has no idea as to who you are?”

“No he doesn’t, I am certain. My plan is to continue my character in the hopes he lets his guard down. The way he acted tonight could suggest romantic, or at least protective intentions, if this is the case we have our way in.”

“Good Work. Starting now. You are to have no contact with anyone from the gang, including me, until such a time comes where you have information that we can use. This infiltration will take time, but I am confident in you that you will be successful.”  

“Yes sir. Thank you sir”

The line went dead.

The mission to get Kim Doyoung to fall in love with me was truly underway.

Part 2 coming soon