#also obviously this guy was being ironic
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#people don’t get it#it’s more ritualistic-bonding thing than anything else#it’s not actual negativity#my own personal opinion is also that it’s definitively a post-soviet thing#also what is this question even#quora man#quora answers#quora#polish people#poland#slavic#slavic people#slavic things#polish culture#Polska#also obviously this guy was being ironic
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omfg . radio play version of much ado with david as benedick from 2001
#this version of benedick is a lottttt more serious and restrained than the 2011 version#definitely due to the medium and bc it matches the energy of this version of beatrice way better#it's not david and catherine's insane comedic chemistry but it's still really good imo..#like it's obviously not as endlessly fucking funny as the 2011 version but it's still really solid#and i'm impressed with how they did the humor in a 100% audio format#and i actually really love this interpretation of benedick as more cynical and leaning into his Hater side#ironically david's benedick here generally comes off as older and more mature than his benedick 10 years later#'the prince's fool... hAhH???' is obviously extremely funny but also 'the prince's fool... [uppity hmph]' is Inspired#and his outraged 'oh!'s and gasps and sighs when he listens to don pedro/claudio/leonato talking abt beatrice being in love with him#also funnily enough i think benedick's whole monologue after this is SO good. if not better than the 2011 version#cuz it's more restrained you have benedick's haterism actively fighting and losing against his satisfaction and giddy laughter#and the bit where benedick challenges claudio is so ohhhghhgouhgghg#the way his voice deepens with 'and her death shall fall heavy on you' just FLOORS me it's fucking perfect#but also equally as fun are the line readings where they have evidently remained the same (or similar)#my dearrrrr ladyyyy disdaiiiiinnnn#and the 'she misused me past the endurance of a block' rant#and when he's bitching about claudio falling in love w hero#but the vibes are so different this feels like a whole separate guy and that's really cool#i'm not sure how much i would love this production overall if i wasn't as familiar w the play tho#much ado#shakespeare#essentially trying to say in the least embarrassing way possible that david tennant is now both my first and second favorite benedick
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My least favorite thing in the progression of FNaF lore has probably been the regression of how painful Full Springlock Failures are. This has bugged me endlessly. No way in hell is that survivable at all and in the movie it’s literally just a couple prongs digging into Matthew Lillard’s stomach.
Never forget that in the original canon that shit pulls your eyes out! Springtrap has animatronic feet with bits of flesh on them! That shit replaces your limbs, man. That’s no joke! Especially because all the animatronic bits need to fight their way through the rest of your body to get where they’re going. You are not making it out of that situation no matter how much medical attention you get.
This obviously doesn’t apply to partial springlock failures, like if they only go halfway in or it’s just part of the suit that fails. And I genuinely really enjoy headcanons and stuff revolving around William having previously survived a springlock failure (especially if it’s what lead to his intense fear of dying). I just don’t see how what the games show could be survived at all and it does sort of get on my nerves that it’s slowly becoming sort of workplace injury and not sudden and violent death.
#fnaf#five nights at freddy's#I want to reiterate that I like seeing springlock survival hcs#it’s people taking what we’re given now and making cool art and stuff#It just gets on my nerves how poorly it’s being handled recently#movie bad etc etc#also if springlock failures are less rare and painful it sort of makes Williams death less ironic#honestly I will not stand for springlock suit slander they cannot be that unsafe#I know what phone guy says idc#only springlock failures we see are William’s and that thing was all wet and gross it’s obviously not going to work properly#and I’m not even convinced the bite of 83 was a springlock failure that thing was moving on stage#like it was actively performing and singing Michael is just an idiot what did he think would happen#do not get me STARTED on the detachable heads
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take pen15 off of tiktok rn bc ppl dont get it
#cheese *blush*#theyre all hating on maya for being a ‘bad friend’ THEY WERE LITERALLY KIDS😭😭😭 ITS SUPPOSE TO BE THEM BEING KIDS.!!!! OF COURSE#BOTH GIRLS ARE GOING TO BE ANNOYING AND MEAN TO EACHOTHER SOMETIMES😭😭#and u can always tell when ppl didnt watch it bc maya HAD been a good friend to ana multiple times but they both made mistakes#and accidentally hurt eachother😭 also ppl saying ‘mayas the type to do xyz’ and its something so horrible like thats a real person😭#the whole show is based off of them like why r u saying maya woukd fucking suibait someone THATS A REAL HUMAN.!!!!!!!#also i hate how they make fun of how the girls look like obviously they have makeup on and stuff but they really do look like that irl😭#its especially bad with maya cus everyone thinks shes ugly and hates on her 10x more than ana like just admit ur racist…#also its so ironic how there was an entire episode in the show where everyone was talking about how ume was so cute and maya felt bad#bc she was also asian and no one was saying that to her and literally everyone is bashing how she looks in the comments#while talking about how attractive shuji is in the same breath like guys . hello#i could talk endlessly ab pen15.. literally one of my fav shows and it makes me so sad to see ppl who havent even seen it say they hate#both maya and ana:(
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Sir Derek Jacobi has no right of basically tearing Crowley and Aziraphale apart when he was in Vicious. That is homophobic, sir. Sir Ian McKellen would not stand for this.
#vicious#good omens#good omens spoilers#Do you guys remember this show or are you too young? It was fun i miss them sometimes#Also i still listen to the theme song sometimes#Idk i was thinking about how i knew the metatron being there on earth would not do anything good#Then i thought of derek jacobi and realised that the first thing i remember him in was basically itv vicious#And like. Very crowley aziraphale coded#Also pls forgive the loose use of the word homophobic. It is obviously ironic
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I'm sorry I need to go back to reblogging memes but I can't say it on other sites
#I simply struggle to feel too bad for military personnel.#like im certain theres situations where joining the military was the ONLY option#but for anyone who joining the military was the Easiest option?#and then complain about their time in the military#like I'm sorry but I will always choose the hard way over the military#I actively dislike people who joined the military and became hyper patriotic about it too#which I know a lot of people in the military also feel#but again. currently. its not like they were being drafted#the military is ironically the cowards way to go through life#HOWEVER the people I have the most sympathy for#those who need that extra assistance to build self discipline#obviously you can't have an army of addicts and criminals and similar#I'm losing my train of thought bcz I've been typing so long#uhhhh something something stop fighting u guys!!!!!!#and ideal military is a non combatant military#that's my hot take bye
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Still thinking about this and I stand by it; to be honest I don't know what Orym would have done, but I'm thinking about episode 31, and how Orym's insistence the party work together was understandable and in-character but also really cut the party off at the knees in terms of venting some frustrations at what ended up being one of the last natural points where they could do so. It's inconvenient that the party fell apart now, but there's been such an ongoing theme of everyone setting aside all their anger and frustration because so much was going on or because they mistakenly believed that was the key to party harmony, and Orym, understandably, is one of the party members most guilty not only of that for himself but of suggesting it, with good but misguided intentions, for others.
I also think gentleness would have neither helped Ashton in this situation, and arguably would have made them feel worse. It's a little awkward right now from a metagaming perspective, and I'm interested in seeing how Liam plays it next episode, but to continue the metaphor above I think the best thing Orym could have done for the party is step back and let the pot boil over for a while.
Wait also before I go to bed: I do actually think Orym not really being there kind of helped bring things to a boil; perhaps WAY too rapidly but I think some things that needed to be said got said specifically because there was no real mediator! I want to see what he says when he gets back, but you know, sometimes everyone needs to scream for a while!
#me: orym is the natural heir to caduceus actually you guys are just overly concerned with the aesthetic over the thematic#also though. idk if it's the same people but it's WILD to see the Orym has a Death Wish and only understands Military Brotherhood sentiment#juxtaposed with the oh but if orym were there it would have been softer and gentler...#feels like you can see the underlying ideological projection grid and pals. it's got REAL big holes in it.#cr spoilers#orym#also. i know i've made a post i can't find before but there's a great history of working in character absences really well#think taliesin being sick during yios; all the c1/2 ashley absences; travis having difficulty with being remote in 2x71#obviously the c2 iron shepherds arc
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pairing: enemiestolovers!yuta x afab!reader
words: 13.1k+
summary: yuta doesn’t care how adored you are. all he sees is a spoiled, narcissistic brat who has her daddy wrapped around her finger. hell must freeze over before he ever entertains the idea of being with you.
genre: smut, fluff, angst
warnings: reader is doyoung’s sister, reader calls her father daddy in the beginning but yuta becomes the real daddy, throat fucking, public sex, collaring, rough sex, pussy eating, squirting, spanking, lots of degradation, creampies, tiny bit of somnophilia
Since he was three years old, Nakamoto Yuta has always been told that he could never trust anyone but himself. Ironically, the words came from his mother, who he was supposed to trust above all.
His father was a businessman who dominated the industry, being both charming and captivating enough to earn the trust of many powerful people. However, his increasing rise in power also led to an increasing role of danger. Yuta had to start being escorted by security at public events, ensuring that the future of the family is established. He became isolated from the rest of the world except for school, where he eventually met a group of boys who made him feel whole.
His parents disapproved of the friendship, considering some of their fathers rivaled his own. He refused to succumb to their wishes, and to this day, it was the only battle he had ever won against his parents.
The only problem Yuta really has is you.
You’re Doyoung’s sister and the most spoiled girl he’s ever met in his life. He previously knew almost nothing about you since when they first met, Doyoung kept most of his personal life a secret. However, when you started attending university together, Yuta discovered your personality little by little and it crept under his skin.
It’s easy to sum up who you were — a rich girl who had her father wrapped around her finger.
Doyoung complained about you constantly after the rest of the guys had finally met you. Even post-graduation, you still found every opportunity to locate your brother’s group of friends and give him an irritating headache.
"Jesus, what are you wearing?"
Yuta observes as you blink your eyes innocently at Doyoung, staring down at your ensemble. You were wearing a crop top and a miniskirt that didn’t leave much to the imagination.
"It's called fashion, Doyoung. Try it sometime, seriously. I'm tired of you looking like a slob next to me at gala events."
The group is seated in one of the exorbitant steakhouses in the city, where they often frequent for an occasional chat. The owners of the restaurant are close family friends with Jaehyun’s parents, so any service worker helping them understood that discussions at the table were never to leave the ears of the building.
You slide into a vacant seat next to Taeyong, flagging down a waiter and ordering a strawberry margarita.
"Why are you here?" Doyoung questions in an agitated voice.
"Maybe she wants to see someone special," Donghyuck suggests, wiggling his eyebrows at you from across the table.
You pretend to vomit. Yuta snickers and Donghyuck glares at him.
"In your tiny dreams, Hyuck. I'm here because daddy wants us to all be together for dinner tonight. Apparently, he has a very special announcement," you smile mischievously.
Your brother raises an eyebrow. Yuta knows Doyoung’s father barely calls him to any important meetings, so this must be something big. "And what exactly is that?"
"It's obviously the announcement that he's chosen me as the heir to his company,” you say confidently.
At this, the whole table bursts into laughter. Yuta clutches his stomach when it begins to ache from the exhilaration.
"What?" You fume, eyes narrowing at the men before you.
"Babygirl, I really think you've got it all messed up in your head," Taeyong chuckles condescendingly.
You roll your eyes and flip your hair over your shoulder, and Yuta catches the scent of your perfume. It makes him slightly dizzy.
"I'm not wrong about anything, you losers. Do you seriously think you could run daddy's company, Doyoung?" You scoff, and your brother glares at you.
"What would you even know about business?" He challenges in response.
Yuta grins at the clear sibling rivalry. Doyoung would never dare to admit it, but he has always been slightly jealous of you. Ever since the two of you were younger, you surpass him in everything — grades, beauty, charm, and even networking connections. Your contribution to charity is constantly promoted in the tabloids, and you became the model for multiple designer companies, just so Doyoung could not turn a single inch without seeing his baby sister's face plastered on a billboard.
Your father adores you the most, pushing Doyoung to the side most of the time. Yuta knows it hurts his friend a lot on the inside, but Doyoung would never tell you about it. No matter how jealous he gets or how broken your relationship is, you still look up to your brother and care about his opinion and he knows that.
"I know plenty. Daddy always brings me to his work meetings, remember? I have all those stubborn businessmen ready to bend down and kiss my feet. I bet you can't say the same," you laugh, raising an eyebrow at him.
Doyoung opens his mouth to argue against the insult but another customer walking in steals your attention. Park Jinyoung enters in all his glory, and Yuta watches as your head spins around, a smile spreading across your face. Jinyoung’s parents owned a global technology company that was slowly gaining traction, allowing him to enter the elite circles of society.
"Jinyoung!" You call sweetly, eyelashes batting. You quickly lean closer to the table so Doyoung can clearly hear you. "Now, if you don't mind, I have to take care of personal matters. But I mean it, Doyoung, you have to be at dinner tonight."
You quickly leave with that remark, looping your arm through Jinyoung's and pulling him out of the restaurant with your margarita in hand.
“I hate her,” Doyoung grumbles when you’re finally out of eyesight.
“No, you don’t,” Jaehyun laughs, nudging him. “She just gets under your skin sometimes. That’s what siblings are supposed to do.”
“Are you nervous? Your dad’s never asked for a meeting like this before,” Taeyong brings up, analyzing Doyoung’s tense form.
Doyoung shrugs and tries to play it off. “A little, I guess. But there’s no point, my sister’s right. If anyone’s taking over the company, it’s her. My father never prepared me for anything and he prepared her for everything.”
Yuta rolls his eyes. “Come on, Doyoung. A spoiled rich girl like her? She could definitely charm some businessmen but she would let people walk all over her. She’ll never be respected with the reputation she has.”
You were well known as a rich socialite who dated around, and although your father allowed you to be by his side during important meetings, Yuta believes your reputation would be the cause of your downfall.
“A little harsh, Yuta,” Donghyuck frowns at his friend’s criticism.
“It’s true,” Yuta says with no remorse. “The corporate world is brutal like that and your sister’s just not cut out for it.”
Doyoung hums softly. “We’ll see.”
—
“I’m here!” You sing, slipping off your heels and handing your purse to one of the maids standing nearby. She informs you that your family’s already seated in the dining room.
You smile when you see your father sitting at the head of the table, and bounce over to greet him with a kiss on the cheek.
“Hi, princess,” he beams.
You take the seat next to your father and across from Doyoung, who looks more nervous than you’ve ever seen him.
“Hi, daddy. How was work today?”
“Very well, thank you, sweetheart. The merger with Lee Corporations is working out perfectly.”
You huff. “I wish you had picked a different company, daddy. You know how I don’t like Donghyuck.”
“Hey!” Doyoung interjects for his friend. “Hyuck’s a great guy.”
“Who flirts with your sister all the time,” your father reminds him, raising an eyebrow. “Not a very respectable man, Doyoung. I wish you would find someone else to occupy your time with.”
You smile in victory and Doyoung glares at you.
Your father clears his throat. “Anyways, I’m sure you’re both wondering why I called you here tonight. I have some good news and some bad news, depending on how you take it.”
You lean forward in anticipation, eyes sparkling at the thought of finally getting responsibilities in the company. Even though your father allows you to shadow him at work and gives you top secrets about your company rivals, he’s never given you any real tasks.
“The good news is that we’re opening a new branch in Osaka, very similar to the one we have here at home. Day-to-day operations will virtually be the same and all major decisions will still be handled by me. The bad news is that only one of you can run the division.”
You and Doyoung lock gazes, eyes both filled with determination.
“I can do it!”
“I can do it!”
Your father chuckles. “I’m glad you’re both willing. I haven’t made any decisions yet, but I want the both of you to start thinking more maturely about your future if you’re considering running this branch. Doyoung, you’ve barely been involved in company activities and you don’t have a good presence in the media. This is something I’d like you to focus on.”
“I’ve been doing both of those things, daddy, if you don’t remember,” you smile at him, watching your brother’s shoulders deflate.
“I do remember, princess,” your father chuckles. “And I have no doubt in my mind you would rule this company with an iron fist.” You giggle while Doyoung scoffs under his breath. “However, the company has received complaints from several of our partners about your behavior towards potential suitors.”
You swallow. Ever since you turned eighteen, you’ve had multiple men from big corporations try to take your hand in marriage. All of them have been political actions, of course, so you’ve never entertained any of their ideas.
“I heard Yang Hongseok proposed to you last month and you dumped a milkshake on him,” your father recalls, raising an eyebrow. “You humiliated him in front of the press.”
“Proposed?” Doyoung questions in shock. “She’s too young for that!”
“She’s already gotten many proposals, Doyoung,” your father corrects. “And, if I’m not mistaken, every single one of them has ended in public embarrassment for the other party.”
You smile nervously. “They’re just not good enough for me, daddy. What can I say?”
“No one will ever be good enough for you, princess. But that’s not the point. The point is that many of these engagements could be worthwhile for both you and the company. You have to see the bigger picture here.”
“So what?” You reply in a bratty tone, feeling frustrated. “Doyoung just has to show up to a few galas but I have to get married?”
“I didn’t say that,” your father frowns at your attitude. “I just think you should take these proposals a little more seriously. You haven’t gotten to know all of these boys, sweetheart.”
“That’s exactly why I said no to all of them. I don’t know them, daddy.”
Your father sighs. “I understand this is difficult for you, but until I see you start acting more mature about this, you and Doyoung will both be in the running for the leadership of this branch.”
Your eyes meet your brother’s across the table.
Game on.
—
Yuta is bored.
This party, hosted by Johnny, seems a little tame in comparison to last week’s. Yuta guesses it’s because of the negative media attention Johnny’s family has been receiving over his extravagant house parties. Although Johnny won’t say, Yuta knows his family chewed him out about it.
“Yuta!”
He smiles when he sees Seungcheol approaching him, and they exchange a handshake.
“How’ve you been? I can’t believe Johnny’s doing this after all of that insane press coverage.”
Yuta shrugs, glancing around at the small house party. Full of rich kids getting drunk and making mistakes.
“You know Johnny doesn’t care about that. It’s pretty dull tonight anyways.”
Seungcheol nods in agreement. “Did you see that Doyoung’s sister is here?”
Yuta barely notices your presence most of the time, so he’s not surprised that he didn’t see you walk in. You’re probably causing havoc with an outfit that’s more revealing than it should be, and it’s likely giving Doyoung a mild heart attack.
“Don’t care,” Yuta replies with disinterest.
Seungcheol laughs at his curt attitude. “Are you kidding me? She’s the hottest girl I’ve seen in ages. How could you not care?”
“She may have you fooled, but I know her well enough to recognize there’s nothing special under that facade.”
Seungcheol shrugs. “Suit yourself, but you clearly haven’t heard the big news.”
Yuta can’t deny that his interest is peaked.
“What news?”
Seungcheol smirks, leaning in to ensure no other guests would hear this tidbit of information.
“She’s looking for a serious relationship, apparently to ease her father’s concerns about her taking over the business. There’s a line out the door of guys begging for a spare minute of her time.”
And that’s when Yuta finally spots you across the room. Just as he pictured, you’re wearing a skimpy black dress that barely reaches the tops of your thighs. He thinks he even sees a guy trip over the even floor from staring at your legs too long. You’re giggling as Na Jaemin leans down to whisper something in your ear, hand wrapped around your waist like it’s another accessory. It isn’t long before his mouth is connected to yours, hand drifting lower and lower down your back.
“Have you seen my sister?”
Doyoung approaches Yuta and Seungcheol, slightly out of breath. His head turns in every direction in an attempt to locate you. He clearly hasn’t ventured to the other side of the room yet.
“Why?” Yuta asks since usually, Doyoung doesn’t care where you are at these parties and he sure as hell never searches for you. As long as your brother doesn’t have to endure hearing demeaning comments about your choice of dress, he lets you partake in whatever activities you like.
“Donghyuck is here with an engagement ring and he’s planning on causing a big scene. She can’t afford for our father to see her publicly reject him right now,” Doyoung sighs, looking more stressed as the minutes pass.
Yuta has always been confused by Doyoung’s soft spot for you. Even though you two are clearly competing for a chance to take over a major part of your father’s company, Doyoung still wanted to protect you.
“Listen,” Doyoung says frantically, watching as Donghyuck slowly slinks around the floor like a predator hunting its prey. “If you see her, could you please just get her out of eyesight? I’ll owe you guys big time.”
When Doyoung disappears into the kitchen, Seungcheol informs Yuta he’s going to grab another drink. Yuta’s left to stare at you and Jaemin, observing as Jaemin’s touch slowly gets rougher and more intimate.
Against his better judgment, Yuta finds himself walking to you, grasping your upper arm and pulling you away from the younger male.
“What the fuck, Yuta?” You hiss, not pleased in the slightest by his sudden appearance.
“Fuck off, Jaemin,” Yuta growls, and as much as Jaemin wants to object, he admits he’s slightly scared of Yuta’s threatening stare.
You watch pathetically as Jaemin gets further and further out of view, mixing into the crowd. You push at Yuta’s chest, ready to give him the beating of his life.
“What the fuck is your problem?”
“Donghyuck’s going to propose to you,” he replies nonchalantly. “Better start running unless you want the news to spread to daddy.”
You curse under your breath and pray to the gods that a demon would come up and swallow Donghyuck whole. Your eyes widen when you catch him from the corner of your eye, a black velvet box tucked securely in his palm.
It’s in this moment that you execute the only plan that pops in your head. You press your back against the wall, forcefully grabbing the hem of Yuta’s shirt to pull him closer to you. He grunts in surprise when he finds himself being pressed against your front.
Your hand grips the back of his neck and you smash his lips to yours desperately.
Yuta would never publicly admit how much he enjoys kissing you. Your lips feel like velvet on his, and his frame cages you against the wall. His hand inches around your waist and he realizes he’s in the same position Jaemin was moments ago.
As sadistic as it sounds, Yuta loves seeing you being put in your place like this. Vulnerable underneath him, hands grabbing whatever piece of him they can find. You’re in the palm of his hand and it turns him on to no end.
In fact, the two of you are so enraptured with one another that you fail to hear the click of a camera.
—
A newspaper slams in front of you during breakfast the next day.
You tilt your head in confusion when you see you and Yuta on the front cover, looking like a scene straight out of a trashy teen romcom. Your eyes flicker upwards to catch the intense glower of your father.
“What is this?”
You put on your best expression of innocence. “Just me and Yuta having a little fun, daddy.”
“This isn’t fun, sweetheart,” he clicks his tongue in disapproval. “This is softcore porn of my daughter on the front page of every tabloid in the city.”
You glance back down at the photo and wince when you realize you’re clearly grinding against Yuta’s thigh with no care in the world.
You frown, lips jutting out into a pout. “I didn’t realize there would be cameras at the party, daddy. I’m sorry.”
He sighs and shakes his head.
“I’m not mad at you, princess. Would I feel better if you weren’t exposing yourself in public like this? Of course. However, your brilliant mind has stumbled across an amazing opportunity.”
You raise an eyebrow, urging him to continue.
“The Nakamoto family are highly regarded and respected in Japan. Showing a united front with them to the public can work wonders for the business,” your father smiles deviously, and your heart drops to the bottom of your stomach at the implication.
“But daddy, I don’t even like Yuta. It was just a one time thing!”
He shakes his head at your pushback. “It doesn’t matter what your intentions were. I want you to make an acquaintance out of him, and ensure the press sees you two together in a flattering light. If you pull it off, the Osaka branch is yours, sweetheart. No questions asked.”
You huff and lean back in your chair, exasperated by the degrading task.
Across town, Yuta finds himself in a slightly different position.
“The Kim girl? Really, Yuta?”
His mother stares him down fiercely, her eyes expressing all the curses she wishes to throw at her son. She nearly hits him in the face when she launches the newspaper to his chest.
Yuta smirks at the sight of him pinning you down for the whole world to see.
“This isn’t funny, Yuta. Hide that ridiculous look on your face,” his mother scolds him. “I don’t want you to be associated with this girl. Her father is an imbecile for allowing her to be involved with the business in the first place — she’s nothing but a girl blinded by the glitz and glamour, and I don’t want that for you.”
Yuta rolls his eyes. As if his mother even cared about what’s best for him.
“Relax. We were just having fun. You know I’d never touch a spoiled brat like her.”
Especially not after you left him high and dry at that party.
His mother smiles. “Good. I don’t care what you have to do, but stay away from her. She’ll only ruin the Nakamoto image.”
And deep down, Yuta knows his mother is wrong. You’re the most beloved influential figure in the city and any family would kill to have you join them. Every man is praying that by some miracle, you choose them as your future husband. The Nakamoto family would be honored if you even threw them a glance.
But Yuta would never tell anyone that.
—
Doyoung is fuming the next time Yuta sees him. Taeyong has to hold him back when Yuta approaches their regular table at the restaurant.
“You disgusting creep! What the fuck were you doing with my sister?”
“Yeah!” Donghyuck chimes in, looking less than pleased. “You don’t even like her!”
“Calm down,” Yuta sighs, taking his seat and ignoring Doyoung’s death stare across the table. “I had to play into her game since someone decided he would propose to her in the middle of a fucking party.”
Donghyuck scratches the back of his neck sheepishly.
“Besides, we didn’t do anything. We made out and she left when Hyuck disappeared.”
Jaehyun snickers from his spot next to Doyoung. “But you wanted to do more, didn’t you?”
Yuta doesn’t respond, keeping a poker face on. He refuses to let this group of ingrates discover that yes, he wanted a lot more from you that you weren’t willing to give.
“Imbeciles,” Doyoung mutters under his breath. “I told you all that none of you are allowed to touch my sister. You’re lucky I even let you come within three feet of her.”
“Are you kidding me?” Donghyuck bursts out again, eyebrows furrowed. “You complain about her all the time! You always say you wish someone would take her off your hands!”
“I didn’t mean you!”
“What are we talking about?”
You comfortably occupy the seat next to Taeyong, lips wrapped around a cherry lollipop. Yuta watches as you swirl the candy inside your mouth, tongue carefully savoring each lick. He wills his dick not to sport a hard-on in public right now.
The sight urges Doyoung to grab the sweet from your hand and crush it under his glass of whiskey.
“Hey!” You whine. “That was my last cherry!”
“Yeah! What the fuck, Doyoung!” Donghyuck complains, indiscreetly fixing the tent in his jeans.
“Can you be a normal human being for once?” Doyoung snarls at you, and Taeyong almost has to hold him back again. “What were you doing kissing Yuta like that for everyone to see? It’s like you have no dignity!”
“Haven’t gotten ass in a while, huh?” You inquire, giggling into the palm of your hand. Your brother’s face continues to bloom into a terrifying shade of red. “Relax. Yuta was helping me out after someone tried to pull that stunt last week.”
Donghyuck pouts. “So you would’ve said no?”
“I would have crushed that box between my fingers and stuffed it down your throat.”
“God, you’re so hot.”
Doyoung glares at Donghyuck once more.
“Anyways, Yuta, outside?” Your question is phrased more like a statement, and you don’t even offer him a chance to respond before you’re strutting out the door.
“Don’t marry her, please!” Donghyuck begs when Yuta gets up to follow you, clinging onto his wrist desperately. “I’ll do anything to have her. Don’t ruin this for me!”
“I’ll murder you right here, Hyuck,” Doyoung warns.
“I’d love to see you try.”
When Yuta finally shakes Donghyuck off and makes it out the door, he pauses when he sees you’ve suddenly become preoccupied by Lee Jeno in the alleyway. Jeno’s family owned one of the largest designer brands in the country, and Yuta recalls that you just became a spokesmodel for their new line. Jeno’s fingers are tracing your midriff, captivated by the sparkly butterfly chain hanging across your stomach.
“Why don’t you let me take you out this weekend, pretty girl? I’ll even let you choose the music this time.”
You giggle, batting your eyelashes up at him. “But you were so picky last time. How can I trust you again?”
He smirks. “You know I’ll take care of whatever you need, baby. You can trust me.”
Yuta clears his throat, feeling his chest swell with unanticipated rage. He doesn’t like seeing Jeno this close to you, talking to you like you’re a shiny new toy. That condescending language should only be reserved for Yuta.
You look back and catch Yuta’s stare, rolling your eyes at his presence. He clenches his fists angrily. You whisper something quietly in Jeno’s ear and he seems pleased, grinning ear to ear and kissing your cheek before he leaves.
“Did you make me come out here just to waste my time?”
You cross your arms over your chest, and Yuta tries his best not to focus on how the action pushes up your breasts in your tiny crop top.
“I brought you out here to make a proposition.”
He scoffs. “Thinking that I would want anything to do with you is laughable.”
“Oh, please. Don’t act like you didn’t have a hard-on when I was riding your thigh last week.”
His ears redden out of embarrassment. He has shamefully pictured that moment with you more times than he would ever admit. Lately, it’s the only vision that can get him off at night.
“It’s not my fault you were making a spectacle of yourself in public.”
You simply smile, mischievous in the way your hand slinks its way around his bicep, squeezing gently. “You liked it, didn’t you? Showing everyone I belonged to you? Putting the pretty Kim girl in her place?”
You take a step closer and his breath nearly hitches at how you’re inches away from his face. He thinks about your perfect lips puckered in a pout. You surely know better than anyone how to get a man to succumb to your wishes, and Yuta is no anomaly to your power.
You bat your eyelashes at him like he saw you doing for Jeno. “Why don’t you help me out, hm? Go on a few dates with me.”
Yuta freezes, shaking his head in an attempt to take himself out of your alluring reverie.
“Why the fuck would I ever do that?”
“Because I get to show daddy that I’m finally taking a man seriously, and you get to do whatever you want with me on date nights,” your voice lowers to a whisper, lips brushing by his. “I heard around the grapevine that you’re a little rough in the bedroom.” He swallows, recognizing that you have him in the palm of your hand with your sugary sweet voice. Your nails scratch down his torso until you’re cupping his growing length. He swears he’s nearly bursting out of his jeans. “I like it a little rough, and it’s just so hard these days to find a good man to please me. You’ll help me out, won’t you, Yuta?”
He tries to regain control of the situation, fingers curling around your scalp and pulling harshly. He grows even harder when all you do is smile at him, taking pleasure in the pain.
“You do this with everyone? Whore yourself out to climb up the company ranks?”
You grin. You both know that Yuta has already agreed with the way his hips are slowly grinding against the front of your skirt.
“Just you. I only need you, Yuta.”
Fuck, he’s in trouble.
—
Yuta thinks he’s reached the peak of ultimate desperation as he stands in front of your door.
Since last night, he’s been attempting to convince himself that he only agreed to your proposal because he hasn’t gotten his dick wet for quite a while. It also doesn’t help that you have been constantly infiltrating his dreams and every lewd fantasy his brain manages to conjure up.
You laid out the simple terms — he takes you out on public dates, ensuring many photos are taken for your father to see, and you agree to go back to his place and allow him to use your body as he pleases. Yuta might as well have a sign hanging above his head that reads pathetic loser with how easily he obliges.
When you swing open the door to your apartment, he notices that you’re half-dressed and slightly surprised by his presence.
“I didn’t think you’d actually come,” you say, pulling him in and locking the door.
He has to grasp at whatever ounce of self-control he has left, eyes raking over your exposed body. You’re adorned in nothing but a black, lacy lingerie set and a silk robe draped open. It’s like you’re trying to test him.
He balls his hands into fists. “Hurry up and get dressed. I already called the press and they’re on their way to the restaurant.”
You pout at his hostile tone, fiddling with the bottom of his shirt and blinking innocently at him. He grits his teeth as you press your body against his. It reminds Yuta of that night at Johnny’s, when you were wedged so perfectly between him and the wall, your lips chasing his in a frenzied play for power.
He’s never been so easily affected by someone before. Usually, it requires an abundance of work on the other person’s part for Yuta to even spare them a glance. When it comes to you, however, he can’t decide if he wants to fuck you until you beg him to stop or if he wants to argue with you until you’re both screaming.
Maybe a little bit of both.
“Are you sure you don’t want a little gift before we leave? You know, to thank you for doing so much for me,” you hum, fingers dancing across his stomach teasingly.
He grabs your waist tightly, scrunching up the fabric of your robe. He gives you a squeeze in warning.
“Get. Dressed.”
You smile at him before obeying, heading off to your room. You do so with a sway in your hips and he curses lowly, forcing himself to move his eyes away from your tempting figure. He glares down at the growing tent in his pants, willing it to go away.
You return to the living room in record time, and Yuta can see why it took you such a short time to change — you’re clothed in nothing but a lavender slip dress, and it’s clear you got rid of the skimpy underwear as he stares at your hardened nipples poking through.
“Don’t worry,” you giggle when you notice his gaze lingering on your chest. “I got rid of the panties too, just to make sure it was a matching set.”
“We’re leaving. Now.”
You’re nothing but a heap of laughter as Yuta pushes you into the backseat of his car. It’s grating to his ears, especially since he knows the root of your joy is his pain. He nearly growls at his driver, who flashes a raised eyebrow before taking off. He awkwardly shifts in his seat, still begging his erection to lower.
You grasp at the opportunity. “Need help?” You cup his bulge and he groans loudly. “You can fuck my throat if you’d like.”
He mentally calculates how much time you have left until you reach the restaurant before grunting at his driver.
“Take the long way.”
You grin when he pulls down his pants and releases his cock from the confines of his briefs. He can practically see your mouth water as you wrap a hand around his base, causing him to twitch in your palm. He praises the inventor of tinted windows, which allows him to expose you publicly like this.
“Mmm,” you hum happily, sucking on his reddened tip gently and lapping the spurts of white pumping out of him. He pushes your hair out of your face while you eagerly sink down on him. It isn’t until he hits the back of your throat that he offers his first thrust. You gag a little but squeeze his thigh, giving him the green light. He throws his head back and pushes his hips upwards, wanting to fuck your throat until it’s raw.
“Look at you. Fucking pathetic,” he hisses. You whimper around him at his degrading tone. “Whoring yourself out in front of me until I snap, hm? Is this what you wanted? For me to fuck your throat until you cry?”
You moan and he shuts his eyes when he realizes you’re actually crying, tears flowing down your face and mixing with the spit running down his cock. He pulls you up by your neck and allows you a few seconds to breathe before sending you down again.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” he pants. “Gonna cum. You better fucking swallow it all.”
He groans when he reaches his climax, holding you steady as he pumps his seed into your waiting mouth. He lets go of you when he’s finished, and you lick up the remaining mess on his cock.
“Good girl,” he praises, watching you clean him up. You beam at his approval and he smiles.
“W-We’ve arrived, sir.”
“Park the fucking car and get out,” he bites at the driver, not caring how much of a dick he’s being. His driver practically launches himself out of the car once it’s in park and you frown at Yuta.
“We’re going to miss our reservation.”
“They’ll make an exception for us. Now get face down so I can eat your pretty pussy.”
—
You can’t get enough of Yuta.
It’s only been a week since your agreement yet you’ve gone on a date every single night, ending with Yuta fucking you wherever and however he pleases. You didn’t lie when you said he could do whatever he wanted to you. Spending continuous nights together, however, prompts the tabloids to swerve into a frenzy of ridiculous headlines.
Nakamoto and Kim — The New Dynasty?
Yuta Nakamoto Seen Eyeing Engagement Rings!
Wedding on Horizon for Nakamoto and Kim Conglomerates
“Yuta!”
But you could care less about the suggestion of your engagement, especially when Yuta has you sprawled out underneath him, ramming into you from behind. Tonight, he was too impatient to finish dinner with you, allowing the cameramen their fair share of pictures before pulling you into the backseat of his father’s car. He instructs the driver to head to his apartment before he’s plowing into you until you cry.
You feel slightly bad for his driver, who hasn’t received a break from the constant fucking all week.
“Ungh, ungh, ungh,” you whimper at the force of his thrusts. It really was true that Yuta was rough in the bedroom, refusing to grant you even a second to breathe until he got his way. You had never felt so used and it aroused you to no end. You’ve had a higher sex drive this week than ever before.
“Why do you even bother to wear panties?” He growls down at you. “You know I hate it when you give me an obstacle.”
You haven’t dared to put on a pair of pants since you began your arrangement. He loves being able to take you anywhere he pleases, flipping up your skirt or rolling up your dress at any time of the night. You suppose he’s even grown weary of your underwear being in his way as well.
“It matches my dress, daddy!”
You never considered calling another man daddy because that term was used exclusively for your father since you were little. However, after discovering Yuta’s liking for the name, you haven’t addressed your father as daddy since then, transferring the moniker to Yuta.
“Who cares?” He laughs devilishly. “You know I’ll rip it off of you before the night ends anyways, sweetheart. And you’ve already made it abundantly clear that you’re all mine. Nobody else would be brave enough to sneak a peek at a pussy owned by me.”
You giggle at the thought of how large your presence has grown in the media. Your father was thoroughly pleased by your association with Yuta, even though Doyoung almost threw his friend off a bridge when he discovered the affair. Your father’s all but signed the Osaka branch over to you, and you can nearly taste victory. You’re certain if you offered yourself to Yuta during the daytime too, he would probably secure an engagement ring on your finger, which would make your father more elated.
Yuta flips you over, pressing your back against the car door and sliding down the window halfway.
“Yuta! They’ll see us!” You squeal, laughing at his carelessness.
“Let them watch then.”
He presses back into you, causing you to moan loudly. You catch the eyebrow raise of the driver through the rearview mirror and smile when you hear the chatter of people on the sidewalk outside, observing your lewd behavior. You pull Yuta down to press his lips against yours, tongues tangling together as he grips your thigh and hooks your leg around his waist. The angle allows him to push deeper into you, and your whines grow louder at the force of his thrusts.
At every red light, you see the flashes of cameras grow brighter and brighter to capture the sight of you and Yuta. You’re frankly too enraptured by him to care, reaching the edge of your climax. He recognizes your telltale signs, and you’re far too gone to be embarrassed by the squelching sounds your cunt makes when he bottoms out.
“Yeah? You gonna cum for daddy?”
You nod, chewing on your lower lip. You shriek when his teeth graze your neck, biting and sucking until he’s left a mark on you. You love how possessive Yuta is, how determined he is to prove to the world that you belong to nobody but him.
Your eyes roll to the back of your head when you topple over your peak, gripping his forearms as he continues his assault on your neck. It’s only after the ringing in your ears ceases that you realize you squirted all over his lower torso and the backseat.
“So fucking messy,” he grunts before following you, spilling his warm seed deep inside you.
You giggle when he collapses on top of you, fumbling around until he finds the button to roll the window back up.
“That’ll give them something to write about tomorrow,” you hum while he licks a stripe up your neck. The car comes to a screeching halt and the driver awkwardly announces your arrival to Yuta’s apartment.
“Let’s go upstairs,” he murmurs into your ear. “I’m not done with you yet.”
—
“Nakamoto Yuta, hm?”
You’re not surprised when another newspaper lands in front of you, but you are a little startled to see Johnny being the culprit behind it. You raise an eyebrow, pushing your laptop to the side as Johnny occupies the seat across from you in this tiny coffee shop.
Once again, you and Yuta are plastered on the front page. There are multiple blurry photos the paparazzi managed to catch of the two of you tangled together in the backseat. No questions need to be asked about what activity you both are engaged in — although the camera doesn’t capture everything, Yuta being shirtless and glimpses of your wild hair is enough to paint a solid picture.
Johnny chuckles dryly at the sight of the grin pulling at your lips.
“He’s not going to last for you in the long run.”
Your eyebrow raise grows higher. “And what makes you say that?”
He smirks. “Because I’m your friend and I know you well enough. You’ll get bored of him. He’s nowhere near your level.”
You fold up the newspaper and slide it across the table with a tantalizing smile.
“Just because I got bored of you, John, doesn’t mean I’ll get bored of Yuta.”
A fire blazes behind his eyes and you know you’ve struck a nerve. You’re not ashamed to acknowledge you’ve slept with most of the men in your elite social circle, considering they’re usually harmless flings and a way to build connections in the industry. Occasionally you’ll come across the type of man who wants more from you, a man who covets the allure of the Kim name.
At this moment, that man happened to be Johnny.
“I heard your father’s offered you a proposition for the Osaka branch,” he comments, taking a sip of his coffee to fake nonchalance.
“So you’ve been prying Doyoung for information?” You guess, playing into whatever game he wanted to lay out for you.
Johnny was a great guy, honestly, and he treated you well when you shared the same bed. But since Yuta took you on your first date a week ago, the thought of being with someone else hasn’t crossed your mind.
“The Nakamoto name — it’s strong now but no one sees them lasting in another decade. Their stocks are down and rumor is that their Tokyo branch is on the verge of collapse. Your father may play with the idea of them at the moment but he’ll soon learn they have much more to gain from your union with Yuta than you do.”
“Such splendid business talk,” you reply with a joyous lilt in your tone. It slightly amuses you that Johnny is so peeved by your newfound relationship. “One would think you’re trying to imply something.”
He leans forward, eyes a little more determined. “The Suh name has been around for decades and has already proven to be stable enough for the market. Our union would play a lot steadier than you and Yuta.”
“The Suh name?” You muse, swallowing a laugh threatening to climb up your throat. “The same Suh name that’s been tainted by their youngest son throwing reckless house parties until the police show up?”
He says your name with rehearsed casualty, though you both understand you know how to play a strategic discussion much better than he does. Your clever wit and the ability to see the argument from all angles is exactly why you’ve been in the running to take the company since you were born, and why Doyoung was lagging so far behind. In this conversation, Johnny is not your friend but simply a business mogul looking to get ahead.
“Come on. I know he’s not the one for you. You’ll miss the chase and you’ll hate the familiarity. I know you.”
“You don’t know shit.”
Yuta approaches the two of you, jaw clenched. Johnny straightens his posture, slightly embarrassed to have been caught talking behind his back. You beam at the sight of Yuta, tugging his hand and pulling him close to you. He continues to glower at the other man before you.
“Ah, so you date in the daytime now too?” Johnny chuckles, attempting to recover from his apparent blunder. “I don’t see any cameras around.”
“You can fuck off, Johnny. You and your ridiculous parties are the reason why you’re groveling at her feet,” Yuta hisses. “Handle your own shit first before tainting another family name with your mess.”
Johnny stands from his spot, causing the chair to squeak from the pressure on the wood flooring. Although Johnny has inches on Yuta, he knows better than to raise a challenge with the growing rate of Yuta’s temper.
Johnny offers one last nod towards you. “Good luck.”
Once he exits the coffee shop, Yuta’s mood sours. You pay no attention to his signs of irritation, pulling him down in the chair next to you and nearly climbing in his lap. You discovered a week ago that you throw your self-respect out the window whenever you see him.
“Daddy, you’re here,” you giggle into his ear, shutting down your laptop that was filled with boring spreadsheets and finance articles. “I missed you. You never come to see me during the day.”
It’s quite obvious that no other man has gotten to know your body the way Yuta has, bearing in mind that you’ve never held a steady boyfriend. Despite the intimacy on your part, Yuta still treats you indifferently during the day, ignoring you whenever you stop by the restaurant they hang out in and refusing to answer your texts until the sun sets. However, when date time commences, he does nothing but shower you in affection and insist it’s hard for him to stay away from you.
It’s very confusing, but you would take confusing and good sex over certainty and boring businessmen any day.
“What else did he say to you?” Yuta asks, brushing off your whines when he doesn’t hold you close.
“I don’t know and I don’t care. Let’s go back to your place,” you propose, already stuffing your laptop into your bag.
You nearly squeal in delight when he tugs on your wrist to take you out of the coffee shop. You watch as he tosses your bag to one of his security guards, telling them to take a stroll while he handles you. You’re skeptical about his behavior until he brings you into a nearby alleyway, shoving your front against the brick wall and flipping your skirt up.
“No panties?” Yuta hisses in your ear, sounding irritated.
“You told me not to!”
It hurts a little when he presses inside of you with no preparation. He takes it slow at first, kissing your shoulder and whispering harshly.
“I never want you to see him again, do you understand?” He questions in a demanding tone. His possessive side turns you on to no end and you nod eagerly, more arousal gushing out of your pussy.
“Whatever you say, daddy. But you know I never wanted to be with him, right? You’re the only one I want to be with.”
“Of course I fucking know that,” he grunts, steadily picking up pace. “I know that because no one else can fuck this pussy like I do. No one else has you wearing a collar with my name on it.”
You giggle at the mention of the collar Yuta had custom made for you days ago, with his name engraved on the little heart emblem dangling from the chain. Many would think it demeaning to wear it and have him attach a leash to you, pulling whenever you disobeyed, but you find it terribly arousing.
It doesn’t take long for you to orgasm, not with him muttering provocative fantasies in your ear and a tight grip around your waist to showcase that you’re his. He takes pity on you and shoots his release on the ground of the dirty alleyway, and you internally mourn the waste of cum that could be filling you up and dripping down your legs. You suppose it could be mortifying to someone else to have their pussy stuffed full of cum with no panties on in public, but you take gratification from it.
He quickly buttons himself back up as you turn around and readjust your skirt.
“So what happens when you get the Osaka branch?” He suddenly asks you, disregarding your inquisitive look.
You frown while fixing your hair through your phone camera. “What are you talking about?”
“The Osaka branch — the reason behind our deal. What happens when you sign the papers? We don’t have to be seen together afterwards, I assume?”
You shrug and tuck your phone away. Despite spending nearly everyday together for the past week, you still can’t get a read on Yuta’s feelings. You’ve taken multiple business classes in the past to overcome this type of difficult feat yet when you gaze into his eyes, you fail to understand the intentions behind his sudden line of interrogation.
“I guess so. We can still see each other in private, though,” you say with a flirty tone, squeezing his upper arm.
He doesn’t return your playful gesture. “See each other until you get married, that is.”
You tilt your head in confusion. Yuta has never brought up the topic of marriage before except to scoff at the headlines speculating the depth of your relationship.
“Um, yes, I suppose we could see each other until I marry.”
He nods and looks distantly off to the side, avoiding your stare.
“I’ll have my driver take you home. I have some business to take care of but I’ll come pick you up for dinner tonight.”
He spins on his heel at his last statement, leaving you alone in an alleyway, more confused than ever.
—
Weeks go by with no more discussions of marriage.
Yuta is on the way to your apartment as the two of you have been recently attending a handful of gala events together, skyrocketing your status as more serious to the public. Tonight was an event hosted by your father, and you hoped it would be the night he announces you as the new director of the Osaka branch.
It’s an important evening for you and Yuta wants nothing more than to be by your side. However, he dreads the moment you sign the Osaka contract, virtually releasing you from all of your duties to be seen with him.
Yuta always thought you were nothing but a spoiled brat until he finally cast aside his own assumptions. Often, during nights when you would sleep over, you both talked about the structure of your family's businesses and what future you envisioned to keep it thriving. It was in these discussions that Yuta really understands how intelligent you are. He used to think you only dreamed of sequined dresses and designer bags, but he can see what a fool he had been.
Your father seriously raised you for the business. After being friends with Doyoung for so long, Yuta knew he wasn’t privy to any of the company secrets or important business meetings. But he hadn’t known that you knew all of it — you possessed every secret that would put the business under, and no one could sweet talk their way out of a dreadful situation better than you. Every heir you’ve slept with usually spills a secret or two during late night pillow talk, and you bring the information back to your father, who uses it as leverage to elevate the company higher and higher until he gets what he wants.
Yuta admires you now more than anything, and that is why he is so afraid to lose you.
Along with the sex being the best he’s ever had, you are truly a magnetic being he can’t separate from. He likes you more than he’s ever liked anyone else, and the idea of you marrying someone other than him terrifies him to his core. You started spending your mornings together instead of simply meeting at night, which was something Yuta tried to prevent for a while in fear of growing too attached to you. It seems far too late to reverse history now, seeing as you have been joined at the hip for weeks.
When he knocks on your apartment door, you swing it open with a glimmering smile painted on your face. He tries to ignore the sound of his heart pounding in his ears.
“Hi, daddy,” you greet with a giggle, kissing him gently and pulling him inside. “What took you so long?”
He watches you cross the living room in search of your other earring and he chuckles.
“Can’t last a second without me?”
You laugh and walk back over as soon as you’ve got your bearings. You kiss him again.
“Don’t get such a big head. I was just wondering when you lost all your manners since it’s impolite to keep someone waiting for you.”
“I like this dress,” he changes the topic, fingers gripping your hips and squeezing roughly. You’ve gone for a simple floor-length red number, one that properly showcases your curves.
“Yeah?” You question, fingers curling around the nape of his neck and tugging gently. “I thought it would look really good with your collar.”
He growls. “Don’t tempt me. Get in the car and let’s go.”
The gala is in full swing when you both arrive, hands locked together as you smile and wave at the flashing cameras. Yuta keeps you close to him when you finally enter the grand ballroom. People immediately flock towards you, desperate to get a chance to chat with the season’s hottest new couple.
Doyoung finds a way to mow through them, approaching you with a bored look. “Congratulations,” he says with a curt tone.
You grin and pinch his cheek. “Aw, don’t be so sad, dear brother. I convinced father to let you shadow him at the headquarters here.”
Doyoung narrows his eyes at the demeaning task but says nothing else to you. Despite his numerous attempts to get his name out in the media, the only question people wanted to know was what designer his sister planned on working with next. Doyoung decided to accept his defeat with grace instead of humiliating himself by taking interviews solely about you.
His stare shifts to Yuta, cold and unforgiving. Doyoung still hasn’t forgotten waking up one morning to the sight of his friend fucking his sister in the back of a car for the whole world to see.
When he turns and walks away without speaking a word to Yuta, you scoff. “What a diva.”
You continue to address the bombardment of excited greetings from fellow guests. By the time you’ve finished a round on the floor, Yuta’s social battery has depleted significantly. With one look at your beaming face, however, his exhaustion spins into adoration.
“I’m nervous,” you whine into his ear, gripping his hand for dear life. “What if they don’t want me?”
“Then they’re idiots who deserve to burn alive.”
You laugh and press a kiss to his cheek. Yuta tries to quell the butterflies swarming his stomach.
“You can burn them for me, daddy.”
The room is silenced when your father steps up to the microphone on stage. You clutch Yuta’s hand tightly and he returns the gesture, afraid of letting you go.
Your father raises his champagne glass and chuckles. “Welcome, everyone. I am thrilled to see so many familiar faces here tonight. As many of you know, Kim Enterprises is looking to branch out and expand our thriving business as we celebrate the continuous growth of our company. And it is my honor to announce the opening of our Osaka branch, which will be spearheaded by my lovely daughter!”
Applause fills the room and all eyes turn to you. You bask in the spotlight, radiating pure joy. Yuta can’t help himself as he leans over to press a kiss to your lips proudly. You return it with as much vigor, giggling and gripping his hand happily.
He catches the sight of your father grinning down at you two in approval. Your father beckons you forward to join him on stage and offer a speech of your own. You squeeze Yuta’s hand one last time before letting go, taking his heart with you.
“Thank you for such a warm reception,” you say cheerfully, extending your champagne flute to the crowd. Yuta catches sight of Doyoung near the stage, who is trying his best to conceal his smile. “I am honored and grateful that my father has chosen me as the new director of this branch, and I will carry out my duties faithfully. I want to thank my brother, who has always allowed me to shine since we were younger and has never hesitated to be there for me.” The audience claps at the mention, and Yuta can tell Doyoung is trying to hold back tears. “And I also want to thank my devoted partner, Nakamoto Yuta, who has become my number one support system these past few weeks.”
You blow a kiss to Yuta, who fails to contain his grin. The audience claps even louder at the mention of your lover, with whispers filling the room about how serious the two of you are.
You finish your speech with as much grace as everyone expects of you, giving your father a kiss on the cheek before he whisks you away to introduce you to important members on the board of directors.
Yuta locates the nearest balcony to catch some fresh air, huffing to himself as he leans over the railing. The silence allows his mind to wander, filled with visions of you eagerly signing the contract to your future. Your father is likely strategizing the next best suitor for you, pushing all thoughts of Yuta to the side.
He can feel the clock ticking away on the time he has left with you.
“You really like her.”
He jumps at the sound of Doyoung’s voice and turns to see his friend with an eyebrow raised.
Yuta coughs awkwardly. “I thought you weren’t talking to me.”
“And I thought you said my sister will never be respected with the reputation she has. That she’s just not cut out for the corporate world,” Doyoung recalls with a knowing smirk.
Yuta scratches the back of his neck. “I was a dick about that.”
“But you like her,” Doyoung states the obvious, joining Yuta’s side by the railing.
“I-I don’t know. We’re supposed to be temporary, and I think that’s all she wants it to be.”
It’s the first time Yuta is voicing any of these thoughts aloud, and the way he’s so affected by the idea of you walking away from him rattles his brain.
“Well, if I know my sister, I know she’s never smiled at anyone like the way she smiles at you. And I know you, and you’ve never volunteered yourself to be willing eye candy at a boring event like this.”
Yuta sighs, wishing he had snagged a good bottle of rum before he came outside. “What am I going to do, Doyoung?”
“Not my place to say,” Doyoung shrugs like the asshole he is. Yuta is very aware his friend is taking a small sense of pleasure in his misery. “Just please, no more fucking in the backseat of cars. Your driver has been gossiping with Taeyong’s about your active sex life and he won’t stop torturing me with the details.”
“Front seats are okay?”
Doyoung’s seconds away from punching him when you run outside, throwing your arms around Yuta’s neck while his hands instinctively slide around your waist.
“Let’s go home, daddy. My feet hurt and I want to give you a good blowie.”
“I’m right here.”
You glance to the side and raise an eyebrow at your brother. All of the sentimental thank yous from earlier are long forgotten.
“Feel free to leave, no one’s stopping you.”
He grumbles at you but does as instructed, heading back inside. You smile when the two of you are alone, pressing a kiss to Yuta’s lips.
“Are you sure you want to go?” He treads carefully. “I’m certain people will notice the guest of honor has gone missing.”
“Who cares?” You scoff, pulling him closer to you. “I just want to curl up with my boyfriend and wear his pretty collar around my neck.”
It’s the first time you’ve ever addressed Yuta as your boyfriend, and he’s not sure that you’ve realized you let the name slip. He kisses you regardless, and sweeps you away in his car. You’re on top of him before he can get a word in, kissing down the column of his throat.
You hum. “I wish you had fucked me before we left, daddy. I’ve been dripping since I saw you.”
“Yeah? You were being a bad girl in front of all those people, waiting to choke on my cock?”
You pull back to respond, but your head tilts in confusion when you catch a glimpse at his gloomy expression. You cup his cheek gently.
“What’s wrong?”
He fails to realize that you can read him like an open book. You look at him with worry, no longer grinding on him like a cat in heat.
“Nothing,” he replies with what he hopes is a convincing smile. “I’m just so proud of you.”
“Liar,” you whisper, pressing a softer kiss to his lips. “Tell me what’s wrong.”
“I’m just, um, I’m just not in the mood tonight.”
“Oh,” you say with astonishment, and he can’t blame you. Until this moment, Yuta has never turned down your advances. You awkwardly shuffle off of his lap.
He swallows nervously. “But I’d still like it if you spent the night. You know, only if you want to.” He’s never seen you look so shocked in your life and he immediately takes it as a bad sign. “Fuck, sorry- Just forget I said anything-���
“No!” You squeak, interrupting his rambling. He doesn’t miss the constant back and forth of his driver’s eyes in the rearview mirror as he watches the two of you finally communicate in something other than dirty talk. “I mean, of course I would like to stay over. We don’t always have to fuck for me to be with you.”
“Yeah?” He says, eyes hopeful.
You smile and lean over to kiss him. “Yeah.”
—
Yuta is a strange creature.
Ever since the night your father announced the launch of the Osaka branch, you feel like Yuta has completely changed his personality from a sex-crazed monster to a loving and doting partner. Oh yes, you two definitely still fuck daily but it’s somehow shifted into sweet, gentle sessions. Instead of bending you over the kitchen table without question, he gently turns you on your side first thing in the morning and presses slowly into you. He also kisses you a lot more when you’re together, and holds your hand whenever you step out in the public eye.
You’re surely not complaining about his behavior, but you are mildly curious about what exactly spurred this on. As far as you know, he thinks you’re a spoiled rich girl who doesn’t deserve everything handed to her. But lately when you’ve been discussing ideas about how to run the Osaka branch, he’s completely attentive and praises you for your progressive thoughts.
Thinking about his changing behavior for too long gives you a headache.
“Do you want to order in tonight? I’m too lazy to cook,” Yuta asks as he fights through a yawn, scrolling through his phone mindlessly while he sits cross-legged on his living room couch.
You’re pulling one of his old shirts over your head since it’s become your new form of pajamas, along with a comfortable pair of panties. You walk out of his bedroom and join him by sitting on his lap.
“Takeout sounds good,” you nod in agreement. He hums and kisses your cheek before checking for available dinner options. You contemplate approaching the topic of his newfound affection, fumbling around with his shirt while you think. “Hey, Yuta?”
“Yeah, baby?” He replies, focus still directed at his phone.
“Do you- Do you not like having sex with me anymore?”
He completely freezes, gathering himself before turning off his phone. He frowns as he looks over at you.
“What the fuck are you talking about? We just had sex in the shower an hour ago.”
You roll your eyes. “Yeah, but now you just treat me like I’m some porcelain doll that’s about to break! I’ve never seen you like this before.”
He sighs and gently nudges you off of his lap. When he stands and starts to pace around the coffee table, you begin to grow worried. Maybe you shouldn’t have brought this up, especially when you see the distressed expression haunting his face.
“Yuta-“
“What are we going to do when you move to Osaka?”
It’s a topic neither of you have broached. You’re supposed to fly out in two weeks to spearhead the launch and oversee all of the new changes. You brought it up to Yuta in passing over a month ago, but you haven’t talked about it since then.
“I-I don’t know,” you say honestly, starting to feel like a child being scolded by their parent. “I thought you would come with me.”
His shoulders relax slightly. “You did?”
“Yeah,” you murmur, feeling smaller than ever. “Do you not want to?”
He kneels before you, taking your hands in his and offering you a solemn look.
“I do, baby, you know I do,” he sighs. “But I don’t want to go if your father just plans to replace me in a couple of months.”
You furrow your eyebrows. “Why would he replace you?”
He looks equally as confused. “Because of our deal? I’m not as valuable to him now since you already signed the contract.”
“Who cares about him?” You hiss, nearly glaring at Yuta. “You’re my boyfriend, I get the final say if you stay or if you go.”
His expression crumbles and you can tell that although you assumed you had been dating for months now, passing the line between casual to serious, he had not been on the same page.
“So you meant it then? That night of the gala — you meant it when you called me your boyfriend?”
“Duh,” you reply as if he’s grown two heads. “I’ve been seeing you exclusively, of course you’re my boyfriend. I don’t just let anyone collar me and hold my hand in public. We haven’t even called the press to take photos of us in weeks.”
He’s kissing you before you realize it, hands cupping your cheeks as he pins you against the couch. You moan into his mouth, feeling his hardened length press against your belly.
“You have no idea how long I’ve been waiting to hear you say that,” he says through a hoarse whisper. “I’ve been treating you like fine china because I thought you were going to dump me.”
“Why?” You pout, suddenly feeling whiny. “I like you and I like it when you throw me around. I don’t want anyone else to use me like you do.”
“Yeah? You mean it, baby?”
You nod and start to feel him manhandle your body until you’re lying on the armrest of the couch. He shoots you a devious look as he hovers over you, slowly slinking down your form. Your breath hitches when his thumbs loop around the sides of your panties, pulling them down your legs and smirking when the fabric clings to your core from your arousal.
“Daddy,” you whimper. “Don’t tease.”
He presses a kiss to your inner thigh and flings your underwear across the room. His tongue runs through your folds before he takes your clit into his mouth, sucking gently. You moan and tangle your hands through his hair. His eyes stay focused solely on you, staring at you as he laps at your cunt. One of his fingers prods at your entrance before pushing in, and you’re almost embarrassed by the squelching sound filling the room. He brings his tongue to your clit again, flicking at the nub.
You can’t help yourself when you start grinding down on him as he presses another digit inside of you. You throw your head back, overtaken by the sensation of him. His nose bumps against you as you messily ride his face.
“D-Daddy- O-Oh fuck, daddy-“
A wail rips from your throat when your pussy gushes, squirting all over Yuta’s face and fingers. You hold him close as he drinks in the remnants of your climax and push him away when it starts getting too overwhelming for you.
He licks his lips in an obscene manner, grinning to himself while you struggle to regain your breath. “Poor baby,” he mocks you, clicking his tongue. “Wants daddy to be rough with her but can’t handle the pressure.”
You don’t even notice he’s left the couch for a short period, blinking away the tears springing up in your eyes at the waves of pleasure still coursing through your veins. Yuta returns with your collar dangling in his hand and you perk up at the sight. He hasn’t used it with you since the night of the gala, and you’re desperate to feel it tugging at your neck. You eagerly sit up and bare your throat to him.
“Good girl,” he praises, snapping the collar tight and hooking his leash around it.
You yelp when he yanks you forward and off the couch. On your knees, you shamefully follow him into his bedroom. He sits on the edge of the bed, peering down at you as you kneel in front of him, your legs tucked neatly below you. He pulls at the leash until you whine, blinking virtuously up at him.
“You’d never do this for someone else, would you? All for me?” He clarifies and you nod fervently, keeping your hands at your side diligently. He strokes your cheek gently and you preen at his touch. “That’s right. You’re mine, baby, and I never want you to look at anyone else the way you look at me, do you understand?”
You nod again and he grins. He leans back and pats his lap, causing you to scramble as you climb on top of him. You straddle his hips, whimpering a little when you feel his clothed length poking at your core.
“Want my cock, baby?”
“Yes please, daddy!”
“Go ahead and take it then,” he says, watching hesitation take over your form.
“B-But you always do all the work, daddy.”
“I know, baby, and I’ve spoiled you way too much. Maybe if you can prove to me you’ve earned it, I’ll be as rough with you as you’ve been craving.”
You frown at his words but you’re not one to back down from a challenge. You pull his cock out, biting your lip at the sight of his leaking tip. He feels heavy in your hand as you line him up against your entrance. He tugs at the leash when you take too long and you cry before finally sinking down on him. A shudder runs through you, still sensitive after your last orgasm.
Yuta is usually the one to set the pace so you struggle to recreate it, whining when you finally take all of him and begin to move. He says nothing as he observes the clear strain this takes on you, your thighs already starting to ache. You ride him as best as you can, twisting your hips in a frenzy while you search for some sort of coordinated rhythm. You hear Yuta chuckle dryly but you ignore him, mind set on proving him wrong.
“My poor girl,” he murmurs in a degrading tone. “Need some help?”
You shake your head even though you’re craving for him to fill you as he normally does, hitting all of the right spots that make you unravel. Tears begin to fall as you press down on him in desperation. You give in, so miserable by your own pathetic attempts.
“Daddy, I can’t-“
“I know, sweet girl,” he coos at you, pulling at your leash until he adjusts you face down on the bed. You mewl when his cock slips out of you, and his hand presses down on the curve of your spine until your ass is perched perfectly for him. His hand kneads at your flesh, cock rubbing through your folds teasingly. “Look at you, can barely do anything for yourself. Such a useless little whore.”
“Daddy, daddy,” you chant, head filled with nothing but Yuta.
You feel complete when he drives the tip inside of you but whine when he pulls it back out.
“Don’t think you deserve it,” he mumbles, spanking you roughly. You whimper as your body lurches forward from the impact. “Spent so long thinking about you, you know? Wondered how I could fall for a spoiled princess like you. Wanted nothing but for you to call me your boyfriend and let me fuck your pretty little throat.”
“I want that too, daddy.” Your picture perfect future includes waking up by Yuta’s side, engaging in a morning quickie, eating meals together, and shopping all day with a few blowjobs in between. You blink away the tears threatening to spill over your eyelids from the overstimulation. “Please, please daddy. I’ll be a good girl for you, I promise. I won’t let anyone else fuck my pussy but you.”
He wraps a steady hand around your leash before putting you out of your misery, pushing his cock through your folds. You moan, head thrown back as Yuta tugs at your leash with every thrust of his hips. It’s exactly what you’ve been missing — the emptiness being replaced with his swelling member stretching your tight cunt around him. The collar makes it hard for you to inhale but you prefer it this way, offering your body in his hands for him to use as he pleases.
“I love you,” he suddenly grunts when his cock angles just right, rubbing against your walls and nudging at your sweet spot. You sob, feeling your orgasm building in your stomach. “I won’t ever love anyone else but you, my sweet girl.” Your eyes roll to the back of your head when your climax hits, spurting around his cock as it drips down onto the sheets. “Fuck, you squirted again? Did you really miss me being rough with you?”
You can barely form a coherent word while he releases his hold on the leash, causing you to collapse onto his pillow like a lifeless doll. You begin to fade in and out of consciousness, but you manage to utter, “I love you too, daddy,” before completely falling into darkness.
When your eyes flutter open again, you’re not entirely certain how much time has passed. Your neck is free from the collar, allowing you room to breathe. Yuta’s body is pressed against yours as you now lay on your back. His cock is still seated warmly inside you and he’s slowly pumping more gentle thrusts. The bedsheets are completely soaked with the evidence of your orgasm.
He hasn’t noticed you’ve awoken again, eyes shut tight and face buried in your neck. He’s groaning lowly, trying not to be too loud.
“Yuta?” You whisper, your voice hoarse and scratchy from all of the screaming. Your fingers brush through the strands of his hair as he looks up at you, smiling softly.
“Hi, baby. Got me worried there for a second.”
“I’m good,” you reassure, and he presses his lips to yours. “Just want your cum.”
He rests his forehead on top of yours, the mood shifting to something more intimate and loving. You never imagined you would be in this position, with Yuta of all people. You always believed you would marry some stuck-up businessman who had no care for your thoughts and feelings, and you became content with the idea over the years due to the overall positive sacrifice it would bring the company. You’ve been raised to think of the business first, but now you see that you can get the best of both worlds.
“I love you,” he repeats, murmuring it quietly.
You swear your heart grows three sizes. “I love you too.”
He grunts when his coil unravels, shooting strands of white into you, painting you to stake his claim. When he gets his bearings together, you both erupt in a heap of laughter. You feel warm all over, like your life is definitively joyous. No one could take this feeling from you.
He rubs his thumb over your ring finger, gazing at the empty spot with a glint of mischief in his eye.
“We should get you sized as soon as we arrive in Osaka,” he says with conviction.
You giggle and pull him down for another kiss.
“Just make sure you get me a big one, okay?”
—
“This is disgusting.”
You chortle when Yuta peppers your neck in a handful of kisses, pulling you closer by the back of your thighs. You feel like a princess sitting on his lap with your engagement ring sitting heavy on your finger. It would all be perfect, except for the fact that you’re surrounded by his friends at their regular table in the steakhouse. The blatant public affection is not completely your fault — who can blame two lovebirds who just got engaged?
It’s only been a few days since Yuta formally proposed. The first thing you did was fly straight from Osaka back to Seoul, rejoicing in the happy news with your friends and family. Your father was overjoyed, openly weeping when he saw how happy you were. Yuta’s mother kept her lips shut tight when you shared the news, clearly expressing disappointment but Yuta displayed no signs of caring for her approval. Since you gained leadership of the Osaka branch, you have been actively working with Yuta’s father to arrange a merger between your businesses. Yuta confessed to you one night that his family’s company was slowly going under, and there was no way you could allow your fiancé to be desolate and poor, could you? His mother hasn’t uttered a bad word about you since then.
Doyoung can feel the bile climbing up his throat at the sight of his sister all loved up with his friend. Donghyuck is pouting in his seat, arms crossed over his chest like a toddler.
“There are others who have to witness this, you know,” Jaehyun says with a smirk dancing across his lips in amusement.
“I can’t believe this!” Donghyuck exclaims incredulously. “You were slut shaming her less than a year ago!”
You coo at him. “Don’t get so upset, Hyuck. You knew you never had a chance.”
He narrows his eyes at you before childishly twisting in his seat until his back is turned to you. Yuta chuckles in your ear, tilting your head towards him so he can kiss you again.
The table collectively groans. “There’s no way you both traveled back from Osaka just to do this,” Taeyong sighs. “Isn’t this supposed to be a party for all of us?”
You part from Yuta and glance over at Taeyong.
“It is a party, but I wasn’t expecting you all to be losers and not show up with dates,” you bite back. You can feel Yuta grinning into your neck at your brazen attitude. Now that he wasn’t on the receiving end of it, he loved it when you got snippy with others and put them in their place.
“Maybe we should go hang out at Johnny’s,” Jaehyun suggests, tired of watching you and Yuta grope each other. “He’s throwing another party at his house tonight.”
“No Johnny,” Yuta says with a stern glare. His friends remain confused while you giggle, pressing a kiss to his cheek at his possessive nature.
“Johnny’s not going to take me from you, daddy.”
“Alright, I’ve had enough,” Doyoung grunts with displeasure, standing from his seat and throwing a few bills down on the table. “Let’s go. I can’t stand to watch this any longer and my ears are already bleeding.”
The group is quick to obey, offering a few more lazy congratulations before exiting the restaurant. Doyoung shoots one last glance towards Yuta, eyes narrowed.
“If you ever make her cry or call her a whore again, I’ll fucking shred you to pieces.”
Yuta salutes him and Doyoung rolls his eyes, leaving you both to your own bubble of gooey affection. You smile and stroke Yuta’s cheek gently.
“Don’t listen to him, daddy. You can still make me cry and call me a whore in bed.”
“You know I wouldn’t have it any other way, sweet girl.”
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May I request a smoll eyeless jack x f reader nsfw story? Or headcanons?
eyeless jack x fem reader NSFW hcs
cw: 18+ content, medical kink, breeding kink, biting, blood, kinda disrespecting boundaries?? kinda not??, afab fem aligned reader
a/n: hey let’s all ignore my wildly different formatting for each post until i figure out wtf i’m doing lmfao. i decided to do hcs for this since i enjoy rambling and i have a couple fics already lined up and those take significantly longer for me to write!! i hope that’s okay anon, i just want to get more stuff posted :) also i threw a bunch of random ideas together for this so if you’d like anything else more specific please req again!
sooo we all know eyeless jack is a demon, right? to say dude is into some freaky shit would be an understatement.
- jack has a higher sex drive than most due to his demon tendencies. pair that with the rush he gets after a good evening of organ harvesting and you’re in for a Very Long Night. his stamina is also no joke.
- wear a short skirt? it’s getting cut off with his scalpel. accidentally slice your finger while chopping vegetables? well you better turn off the stove because he’s bending you over it. he senses you’re ovulating? he’s fucking you twice as much.
- if you’re into medical play and getting cut up with surgery tools he will be over the moon.
- if not, you’re gonna have to have a sit down talk with jack. he will do his best, but he can end up viewing you as just a lowly human at times. you’re gonna have to put your foot down sternly to fully gain his respect. he cares about your boundaries (somewhat), it just takes a minute to get through to his human side.
- on that note, don’t even dream of dominating him. he’ll laugh in your face and restrain you if the idea even crosses your mind. the thought of a weaker being telling him what to do during sex is comical to jack. he might let you ride him if he’s feeling lazy, but his clawed hands will be gripped around your waist as a silent reminder of who’s in charge.
- he’s into degradation. not the typical “you’re a whore” shit. no, this guy will take every chance to remind you that you’re just a fragile little human that’s only breathing because he lets you. if you feed into his ego, jack will reward you with his face between your thighs for hours.
- ooh let me take a moment to talk about this monster’s tongue. godly is an ironic term to describe anything involving jack but it’s the only fitting word. it’s long, slightly textured, quick and strong. he looooves to edge you until you inevitably break and the only words you can form are broken pleas. you’re gonna have to pry him off of you during your periods. he’s a little nasty
- jack will pretty much refuse to cum anywhere that isn’t inside you or your mouth. during sex, he tends to fully give into his animalistic demon qualities. meaning the only thing running through his mind is ‘breed, breed, breed.’
- big corruption kink. like MASSIVE. i think all the pastas have some form of corruption kink, but obviously the whole demon thing brings it to a new level. if you were a virgin when you met him, he’s gonna have to physically restrain himself from pouncing on you the second its brought up in conversation.
- let’s talk about positions. jack’s not really picky as long as he’s fucking your brains out but he does have a few favorites. mating press is almost always a winner since it feeds into his need to breed (i crack myself up). missionary is a classic that ensures he can have complete control. jack is also a fan of fucking on operating tables???? don’t ask me ask him, he’s odd. his least favorites involve 69, cowgirl, or pretty much anything that involves you on top of him. he doesn’t really get tired so doing all the work doesn’t bother him.
- will 100% spit in your mouth and he doesn’t care if you think it’s gross. get used to it sorry. if you’re into it then you’ve won.
- probably will throw a tantrum if he finds out you masturbated without him. he’s given you so much special attention and you still want more? well. he’s gonna fuck you so hard that you’ll be too sore to even think about touching yourself. i’m praying for you girl good luck.
- LOVES TO BITE ON YOUR CHEST AND NECK. i cannot stress this enough. and he WILL draw blood, i mean his mouth is full of sharp teeth so it’s basically a given. bro will be fucking you and straight up take a drink break FROM YOUR THROAT. be prepared to never show your neck or cleavage in public ever again. unless you’re into that. then you go girl, we’re all cheering for you.
- jack thinks it’s hilarious to say terrifying unsexy shit during sex. “i can’t wait to cut you open and eat those delicious kidneys that belong to me….” you just look at him with your mouth open. you’d be better off ignoring his annoying ass he (probably) doesn’t mean it.
#eyeless jack#eyeless jack x reader#eyeless jack x you#eyeless jack x y/n#eyeless jack smut#creepypasta smut#creepypasta#creepypasta headcanons#creepypasta x female reader#creepypasta x reader#celia reqs#eyeless jack headcanon#i refuse to abbreviate creepypasta yall are crazy for that
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argument
its a big one
TG: alright this is probably a bust
TG: more i think about it how the fuck do you even make a marinara
TG: can i even alchemise cheese or do i gotta like alchemise the milk and curdle it myself
TG: how do you even curdle
====================
TG: make a goddamn
TG: curgler
TG: whatever
TG: internet archive gonna pull through
====================
CG: ALRIGHT DAVE
TG: shit
====================
CG: YOU BETTER BACK THE FUCK OFF. I DON'T KNOW WHERE IN BULGEMUNCHING VIRULENT FUCK YOU GET THE IDEA YOU HAVE ANY RIGHT TO TELL ME WHAT I SHOULD THINK ABOUT MY OWN GODDAMN PLANET. SORRY TO HAVE TO DEAL A BLOW TO YOUR IMPOSSIBLY INFLATED FUCKING EGO, BUT HAVE YOU EVER CONSIDERED THAT YOUR SIDE-EYE SLACKJAW HOPELESS DEADPAN BULLSHIT BEHAVIOUR IS ACTUALLY INCREDIBLY FUCKING CONTEMPTIBLE AND DOESN'T PUT YOU ABOVE OTHER PEOPLE? HAVE YOU CONSIDERED THAT?
CG: OR DID YOU JUST ASSUME FROM THE MOMENT YOU FOUND OUT I'M A REVOLTING FUCKING MUTANT LOWBLOOD FREAK THAT I'M SUDDENLY NOT ALLOWED TO LIKE THE IDEA OF MY LIFE MEANING SOMETHING AT SOME POINT?
TG: okay you are wildly misquoting me where the fuck did that come from
TG: also you scared the hell out of me
TG: im just trying to science some pizza here
====================
CG: OKAY THEN, DAVE! EXPLAIN TO ME AS WELL AS YOUR AMBLING ONE-NOTE SMOOTH EXCUSE FOR A 'THOUGHT'SPONGE CAN
CG: IN SOMEWHAT COHERENT TERMS, ALTHOUGH I KNOW THAT'S A TALL ORDER:
CG: HOW YOU SAYING MY ADOLESCENT DREAMS OF BECOMING A THRESHECUTIONER ARE "FUCKED UP AND IRONIC IN A NASTY ASS WAY" DOESN'T QUALIFY AS UNDERHANDEDLY KICKING ME IN THE MANDIBLE PRONGS!
CG: YOUR AUDIENCE AWAITS YOU WITH BATED BREATH! TAKE IT AWAY, M.C. BRAIN HEMORRHAGE.
====================
TG: okay i dont
TG: know how you got a hold of that phrasing because i said that shit in confidence
TG: get out of my business bro
CG: NEWSFLASH, ASSHOLE: THIS METEOR IS A PHYSICAL, LITERAL LOCATION WE'RE BOTH IN. IT'S NOT A FUCKING PRIVATE CHATROOM. THIS MIGHT BLOW YOUR PITIFUL MIND BUT PEOPLE CAN ACTUALLY HEAR OTHER PEOPLE TALK WHEN THEY HAVE TO SHARE A SPACE! BRO!
TG: ugh
====================
CG: AND IT'S VERY INTERESTING YOU ACCUSE ME OF MISQUOTING YOU, AND THEN SUDDENLY TURN AND SPOUT FROM THAT SHITTY DRONING GROANSHAFT OF YOURS THAT I'M INVADING YOUR PRIVACY WHEN I DIRECTLY QUOTE YOUR SMARMY LITTLE SHAMEGLOBES!
CG: WOW! TURNS OUT KARKAT IS ACTUALLY BEING GENUINELY FUCKING UPSET ABOUT SOMETHING — WHO KNEW, RIGHT? WHO WOULD'VE GUESSED THAT I ACTUALLY HAVE GENUINE COMPLAINTS TO LEVEL AGAINST THE PEOPLE WHO GO SPOUTING HOOFBEASTSHIT ABOUT ME BEHIND MY BACK TO THEIR ECTOSIBLINGS?
TG: no dude can you shut up a second
CG: I MOST CERTAINLY FUCKING WILL, THANKS FOR THE OFFER! I'M NEVER TELLING YOU A GODDAMN THING AGAIN, SO I HOPE YOU MANAGE TO GAIN SOME WRINKLES TO THAT VESTIGIAL FLAWLESS ORB FLOATING AROUND IN YOUR CAVERNOUS NUGBONE FROM ALL THIS. I HOPE IT WAS WORTH ALL THE EFFORT ON YOUR END.
TG: listen!!!!
====================
CG: MHM! MY AURICULAR CHAMBERS ARE WIDE OPEN!
TG: jegus
TG: okay
TG: i have no defense for my literal phrasing but how expeditiously did you shadowstep the fuck away after i said that
TG: because that is some shrek tier "princess and ugly dont go together" level misrepresentation of my sweet self
TG: like if this wasnt obviously a heated platonic argument we were having i would probably be digging what the reference even if it was a shitty trope
====================
TG: i just
TG: have been thinking about some things and none of those things have got an iota of a thing to do with you or your blood
TG: thing
TG: man
TG: i dont know why you think id be so pressed about your vein juice its like
TG: a normal ass color for a normal ass guy
TG: and obviously it was a major fucking deal from how you talk about it but it doesnt need to be anymore
====================
TG: the thing is i just dont like have the same attitude as you about fighting and stuff and thats not something i am getting into right now but i am gonna make it expressly clear
TG: that its just kind of fucked up for me to sit my ass down and listen to someone spew gold and medals and confetti colored shit going googoo all over tall and loathsome ass bloodletters he never knew
TG: and have him tell me he wants to be the best guy at combat since samurai fuckin jack
TG: and thats my capital B business believe me the emphasis is there
====================
CG: SO IS THIS ABOUT ME WANTING TO BE PART OF SOMETHING YOU DON'T AGREE WITH? BECAUSE THRESHECUTIONERS DON'T EVEN FUCKING EXIST ANYMORE. I LITERALLY COULD NOT DO THIS IF I TRIED AT THIS POINT, SO YOU CAN UNKNOT YOUR “KNIGHTY WHITIES” ABOUT IT.
TG: being anti-military is not my point but damn if it isnt a thing thats probably true anyways so good job sleuthing that out
CG: WHAT IS YOUR POINT, DAVE.
TG: bluh
TG: i just said i dont wanna talk about it man
====================
CG: OKAY,
====================
CG: OKAY.
CG: I MEAN. IT FEELS KIND OF IMPORTANT TO THE CONTEXT OF THIS WHOLE UNAMBIGUOUSLY PLATONIC ARGUMENT WE'VE BEEN HAVING
CG: WHICH I'M RELIEVED WE AGREE ON BY THE WAY
CG: BUT IF YOU DON'T WANT ME TO KNOW I'M NOT GOING TO WRING IT OUT OF YOU. IT'S FINE.
====================
CG: …IF YOU DECIDE AT SOME POINT THAT YOU WANT TO TELL ME THOUGH, MY RUMBLE VESSELS ARE STILL OPEN.
TG: i swear youre making those up on the spot at this point
CG: I'M KEEPING MY LANGUAGE'S ART ALIVE, DAVE. IT'S BASIC DECENCY TO THE PLANET THAT RAISED ME.
TG: heh
====================
TG: yknow we got these things called anatomical snuffboxes
TG: its got that right amount of vague nose wrinklage to it that i feel like youd be right at home saying that
TG: snug as a grub even
CG: WHAT PART IS THAT???
TG: its that little weird bone bit that sticks out on the back of your palm when you flex your thumb right
====================
TG: look
CG: HUH. LOOKING AT THAT IS KIND OF WIGGING ME OUT.
TG: yeah its kinda gross rose told me about it
TG: but anyways
====================
TG: are we cool
CG: I MEAN… I GUESS SO. YOU WEREN'T ACTUALLY INSULTING ME, RIGHT?
TG: hell no dude never
CG: OKAY. I COMPLETELY RESCIND THE MYRIAD OF WAYS I JUST INSULTED YOU. AND I'M SORRY.
TG: nah i know its just fluff at this point
====================
CG: I STILL DON'T APPRECIATE YOU TELLING ROSE THINGS I SAY TO YOU IN CONFIDENCE. THAT WAS BETWEEN YOU, ME, AND MY NOW NON-EXISTENT HOME PLANET ROTTING AWAY TO A CRATERED GRAY HUSK IN ANOTHER DEAD UNIVERSE.
TG: i swear that was like the only thing its just that she gets it and i cant keep my mouth from going on about the gettable stuff
TG: they call me the babbling brook the way my flows so audible
TG: i wont do it again
CG: NO,
====================
CG: I GET IT HONESTLY.
CG: I'M BASICALLY THE NUMBER ONE PROPRIETOR OF AIRED GRIEVANCES IN ALL OF PARADOX SPACE AND THEN SOME, AND I'D ALSO BECOME ITS BIGGEST HYPOCRITE IF I HELD IT AGAINST YOU.
TG: thanks
TG: but i mean
TG: at the gigantic risk of sounding uh
====================
TG: ………..
CG: ?
====================
TG: well
TG: i kinda just think youre better at being a guy to chill out and watch movies with than a guy to tangle fists with
TG: and i dont think theres anything wrong with being that
TG: i think its cool
====================
CG: …THAT'S AN ALARMINGLY BRAZEN OBSERVATION TO MAKE OF SOMEONE YOU'VE KNOWN FOR ABOUT THE SPAN OF SEVEN SEASONAL EQUINOXES, DAVE.
TG: i dont know what that means but it sure is probably
CG: AM I ALLOWED TO ASK WHAT EVEN GIVES YOU THAT IMPRESSION????
TG: i just got that inkling about you man
====================
TG: and you can do whatever you want with that info
TG: throw it in the load gaper or whatever if you want i dont really care
TG: give it a swirly and slam it in a locker call it a nerd break its glasses whatever
TG: but beyond this whole lord english thing weve got going on i am pretty content to never aggress my fellow man slash alien slash monster again if i can help it
TG: i think thats pretty fair given what thats been like so far
====================
TG: and yknow its cool to have some company when im waxing emotional over the narrative depth of click starring adam sandler which we are watching next by the way
CG: UGH, FIIIIIIIIINE. JUST TO MAKE UP FOR CALLING YOUR THINKPAN SMOOTH AND SUPERFLUOUS.
====================
TG: score
TG: we should argue all the time
CG: SNRK
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not to be vulgar but im going to be vulgar. do u have any thoughts on how the stark men would eat u out (other than like a man starved ofc)?!!
YES LETS GET VULGAR. I HAVE THOUGHTS OH YES I DO
okay, so, jon obviously does it to make you feel good. but he also finds eating you out pleasurable. the taste of you, the cries of his name spilling from your lips, the way you tug on his hair, the feeling of your thighs trembling around his head — it’s pleasurable for him. sometimes after a long day, he just needs to blow some steam off, needs relief. and he finds that within you & your warmth on his tongue. ohhh yeah. pulling you to sit on his face, hands locked around your thighs with an iron grip. best believe you aren’t getting up anytime soon.
robb does it because he likes making you feel good. his entire life is in disarray, and everything is going wrong for him. he has to constantly make difficult & sometimes cruel decisions, he likes being able to give someone something good — like making his wife cum as many times as she wants. and i’m sorry i’m about to get lewd on here, but robb seems like a fingering-you-while-he-sucks-on-your-clit typa guy. and truly, being intimate with you is part of his sanctuary. it’s those sacred moments where you’re sharing each others bodies that has his mind drifting from the present war, and you’re both just in your own little bubble.
and cregan….. cregan just does it cause of how in love with you he is. like he’s just so head over heels for you, he has to make you writhe on his tongue. and especially if you were a maiden before you both got married, there’s something about giving you more pleasure than you thought possible. there’s honeslty not much to add, he does it cause he loves you and he wants to. & it’s also his favorite way to warm you up. laying you down on the furs in front of the blazing fire, hands wrapped around the outside of your thighs to keep you in place…. need. don’t worry about the cold, you’ve got cregan.
#dippys asks#game of thrones#house of the dragon#robb stark#jon snow#cregan stark#cregan stark thoughts#cregan stark x reader#robb stark x reader#jon snow x reader#vulgar looks like vhagar#welcome home#vhagar anon#the stark men
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Steve who goes on a Bake Off type show after Robin, Dustin, and Max set him up as a contestant. He doesn't want to, doesn't think baking or cooking should be stressful, but he's been wallowing since his knee surgery took him out of work and basketball, since his divorce.
His first day on set, he's totally gobsmacked by the sexy host with all the tattoos and long, curly hair. Just, cannot take his eyes off the guy, blushing and stammering whenever he comes around to do interviews, obviously can't stop starring.
After the first day, where he manages to stay comfortably in the middle of the pack, he calls Robin to complain about what a mess he becomes around this gorgeous dude.
Her response is to cackle and say, "Steve! How do you not know who Eddie Munson is? Oh my god, you're a disaster."
Turns out, Eddie Munson is the lead singer of Dustin's favorite band, Corroded Coffin, and also pretty well-known for his dnd YouTube channel. He's been a host on the show for years, only Steve doesn't really pay attention when the others watch it and didn't know.
Eddie, for his part, is losing his mind. He'd known about the beautiful contestant for this season, former college basketball superstar turned coach, having a hell of a shitty year after dislocating his kneecap in a charity game. Eddie--foolishly, it turns out--thought he wouldn't be as attractive in person. He also expected Steve to be terrible and egotistical, a jock through and through.
So, when Steve Harrington walks into the tent in a short-sleeved polo and obviously ironed jeans and is still drop-dead gorgeous, he's fucking flabbergasted. And then Steve has the audacity to be nice? Kind and thoughtful and running to help other bakers when he still has work to do himself? He also blushes so pretty, high across his nose and cheeks, and god does hewant to be the reason Steve blushes like that.
Eddie is beside himself.
Leading up to the second week, Steve schools himself into being calm around Eddie. He can't afford to lose his cool like that every time the host is around. Except, this week Eddie flirts with him shamelessly. Winks at him, leans into space, calls him "m'lord" with this deeply resonant voice that makes Steve want to drop to his knees. Steve doesn't mean to, not really, but he flirts right back, feeding Eddie tidbits of his bakes and looking for any excuse to touch him.
Steve does well for the first half of episodes. He never wins the technical or star baker, but he's regularly within the top contestants. On episode five, though, something is off. He's distracted, forgetful, doesn't leave enough time for his custard to set in the signature. Eddie asks if he's okay, but Steve shrugs and smiles, says "off my game today."
But then, in the technical, he curdles his buttercream more than once, and his genoise sponge burns. Eddie watches as Steve folds his arms above his head and disappears from view. He doesn't hesitate, he sprints from his interview, falling to his knees in front of the contestant.
"Stevie, sweetheart, what's going on?"
"I get migraines," Steve whispers. Trails of wet streak down his cheeks. "I've felt one coming all morning, been trying to stave it off but--"
"Okay, okay," Eddie shakes out his hands. "You can sit out this challenge, yeah? Or take this weekend off. It happens. You'll come back next week--"
"I don't want to stop." More tears fall from his eyes.
"What do you need?"
Steve shakes his head, wry little smile pulling at his lips. "Time to breathe."
Eddie glances up, eyes catching on the camera crew hovering in front of them. He throws both middle fingers up and says, in the most reasonable and even tone, "fuck!" Everyone in the tent looks at him, but he doesn't stop. "Shit!" "Bitch!" Motherfucker!" He goes on and on, saying the filthiest series of things he can think of. The camera crew steps away, another contestant brings Steve a glass of water, and Eddie sits with him.
The other host announces that there are thirty minutes remaining in the challenge.
"Well. That's that, then," Steve says. He stands, patting the naked skin of Eddie's knee where it shows through the rip in his jeans as he goes.
"Wait, what do you mean?"
"Out of time, no cake, no buttercream."
Eddie hops to his feet. "You're going to let that stop you?"
"Well." Steve laughs. "Can't serve this." He gestures to his discarded bowls of frosting, his burnt cake.
"You have time to make another buttercream."
Steve raises an eyebrow. "Sure, but not the cake."
"Cut the burnt off. Cover it in the buttercream. Easy peasy."
"Okay..." Steve stares at his station. "Okay, that could work. It won't be pretty, but--"
Eddie, knowing he's no longer needed, steps away, and Steve gets to work.
Steve tells Robin all about it and, as soon as he gets home from the taping and she's immediately like, "Eddie Munson, huh?"
He shoots her a look. "It's nothing."
"Yeah, him leaping over a table to check on you is surely nothing."
"Robin," he warns.
"What?"
"Eddie would never want a guy like me."
She laughs but quickly grows sober. "Steve. Of course he would. He likes you."
"It's nothing, really." He walks towards the kitchen. "What do you want for dinner?"
Eddie experiences the same harassment from his band members and their manager.
"You're gonna ask Harrington out, right?" Gareth asks.
"That would be a little bit of a professional conflict of interest," he deadpans. He doesn't look up from his guitar.
A puffed Cheeto smacks him square in the forehead. "Hey!" He shrieks.
"He means once the season is done, Edward," Chrissy says.
He wipes the cheese dust from his forehead. "Not a good enough reason to call me Edward. Anyway, I'm pretty sure he's straight."
Jeff guffaws. "C'mon, dude. No way. He's so into you he might as well have a neon sign."
"He divorced a woman."
"That doesn't mean anything, and you know it," Chrissy says.
Eddie rolls his eyes. "I may be considering asking him out. Maybe."
Everyone cheers. More Cheetos hit him in the face.
---
To Steve's great surprise, he makes it to the finals. Not just makes it, he gets a star baker, gets first in the semi-final technical. He's baking in the final and might have a fucking chance.
It's with great surprise, once it's all said and done, that he hears his name announced as the winner. He doesn't have much time to process it, because Eddie is striding towards him. He's not carrying the cake stand trophy or flowers, it's just Eddie.
Eddie who stops in front of him, eyes shining. Eddie who leans in and whispers, "I knew you could do it, baby, I'm so proud of you." Eddie who twines his fingers through Steve's hair, pulling him into a soft, sweet kiss.
The internet explodes as the season airs. Everyone is obsessed with Steve and Eddie. They have fics on ao3, a dedicated tumblr community, edits, playlists, gif sets, a ship name all dedicated to them. The fandom grows after episode 5 airs. Not all the footage makes it, thanks to Eddie, but they still witness him tenderly taking care of Steve and directing the cameras away. Fans start scouring their social medias, looking for any hint of their relationship status; even beg them in comments and DMs to reveal if it was just a showmance.
Eddie and Steve, however, are happy in the quiet little world the carved out for themselves after filming. They aren't ready to reveal anything, even hints, whether or not the show would let them.
Then, the final airs and the kiss is revealed to the world. The ending title cards show a picture of Steve with the rest of the season's bakers and the caption, "Steve threw a party for the other bakers..."
The picture then changes to one of he and Eddie, arms wrapped around each other. This caption says: "...at the home he shares with his boyfriend Eddie."
That night, in bed, Steve says, "I'm really glad Robin and the kids made me go on the show. But do you think it's bad that the thing I'm happiest about, way more than winning, is that I met you?"
Eddie places a slow circle of kisses in the dip of Steve's lower back. "Sweetheart, I'd be disappointed if you said anything else. Now, hush, I have a baking champion to congratulate."
#steddie#steve x eddie#steve harrington#eddie munson#ficlet#fluff#mutual pining#bake off au#tv host eddie munson#bake off contestant steve harrington#i just finished the latest season and had to make it steddie#mel and sue used to do the thing where they cussed and flipped off the cameras so upset bakers couldn't be filmed
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enhypen doing a challenge with you
pairings: idol!enhypen x fem idol!reader | genre: fluff | wc: 1000+ | prompt: ENHYPEN members when you do a challenge with them but the catch is your dating them secretly | warnings: not proofread | LIBRARY FOR MORE...
이희승 (lhs)
you're the 6th (or 7th) member of lsfm. you just had your comeback easy, and you're were told you were going to do a challenge with heeseung. and boy, heeseung was so happy. like he forgot about dating and how judgmental knetz can be. hes just excited to see you because how busy you were do to your promotion schedule meaning he couldn't see you for weeks. when you guys meet at the hybe dance practice room, you teach him how to do the dance. which he obviously eats it up. then you would start filming the challenge. the two of you guys would end the challenge by like going opposite directions (like out of the camera view). and as heeseung being a supportive bf, he would watched the mv and dance. so he would like exit the camera by doing that chaewon move. like i can see him doing it so vividly and leaving the camera view while your laughing so hard. now the comments are all like: "heeseung being #1 fearnot fr!"
rest of the members below
박종성 (pjy)
as the 5th member of aespa, you had a comeback of drama. and comebacks = interactions with idols = interaction with enhypen = interaction with specifically jay. and when jay heard hes going to do a challenge with you, bro is like yapping about it 24/7 to his members. he would be sitting in the living room, yapping to jungwon, "man, im gonna film a challenge with my amazing gorgeous girlfriend." but now lets talk more specifically during the challenge. he would have already learned the choreography because he streams ur music duh. and by the time you go to hybe dance practice room, he's basically like the 6th member of aespa. during the challenge, jay would try so hard not to smile at you cause of rumors (and he doesnt want to be fired). but in the end, he does give a small smile to you cause he can't even hold it. (guess what the next topic will be during the next enhypen discussion!)
심재윤 (sjy)
being the maknae of gidle, is also being the gf of jake from enhypen. you're the youngest in the group and you had your comeback of super lady (lady lady call me super lady). and jake already, as the golden retriever he is, he's hyping you up 24/7. he stalks your instagram page + fancams. like even before his manager tells him he's gonna do a challenge with you, he already knows the lyrics and dance by heart. when he does the challenge, he eats it up. but lets be honest, jake would honestly purposely cause a dating rumor during the challenge. like this man can't hold his urge to hug you at award shows or talk about you during live so he would just like grab your waist while watching the scenes (NOT TO MENTION, THERES A BEHIND THE SCENES CAMERA WATCHING WHICH HE OBVIOUSLY KNEW). like jake that wasn't part of script (????)
박성훈(psh)
7th member of ive, which is aka you. you knew sunghoon cause your member, wonyoung, is friends with him due to them being music bank mcs together. (lets say you were jealous that your member got to be with him every friday and not you but still) you had just came out with all night (cover) and enhypen came out with sweet venom. like his challenge with wonyoung, you would film the all night challenge + sweet venom challenge too with him. before, sunghoon would be sooo happy to see you but at the same time so scared (this man has like trust issues with k-netz so). during the behind the scenes, you guys would just standing 🧍♂️🧍♀️ like this. like your scared too (i would). but in the end, when all the cameras are off you wave goodbye and of course sunghoon leaves a small kiss on cheek.
김선우 (ksn)
obviously, as expected, you're the 6th member of newjeans. being in the same company as sunoo means that you would be best friends with him. ironically, you knew each other from school and unexpectedly joined the same company. as sunoo is easy to connect with, you two became close friends within days. six months later, you're now dating sunoo (cute <3). during the sweet venom era, you film a challenge with sunoo (you begged the company). usually, hybe posts behind-the-scenes of challenges, so your behind-the-scenes footage i feel would go viral. some fans were shocked to see the fact that the two of you were friends and knew each other (well, you were technically more than just friends). but at the end of the challenge, you guys would do a heart together 🫶. like, how cute is that?
양정원 (yjw)
you were gonna have a comeback, dash, as a member of nmixx. which meant you were going to do a challenge with jungwon. which means you were going to see your bf (or your loyl). you guys do the part of "mhm i just want to continue my pace!" and you messed up so badly cause how cute jungwon was. I MEAN WHO WOULDN!?!??! like you want to stop the video to just squish his cheeks and dimples!!!!! but other than that, after 45 tries you made it and was able to post it. your guys interaction was so >>>>>>>>.
西村力 (nsr)
10th member of kep1er was you. being from a survival show like riki, meant that you were easily connected with riki. ironically you both guys came in 4th in survival shows. back in galileo, era, you guys filmed a challenge together. the two of you were known for your dancing skills and rapping skills. so obviously when you filmed a challenge, fans are freaking out. but in reality, the two of you were actually dating and super excited to film the challenge. riki never really did a gg song challenge often so it was slightly new but in the end he was able to pull it off iconically (as usual, like did you guys see the hype boy challenge and super shy challenge?!?!??!). but let's talk more deeply during the challenge. riki was obviously the shy person as he couldn't seem to make eye contact with you. the comments are all about riki's shy smile towards you and started shipping you + him.
#ʚ( ៸៸ ´ `) 𝑜𝑓 : 𝓁𝑜𝓋𝑒 ︐#enhypen masterlist#enhypen imagines#enhypen scenarios#enhypen fluff#enhypen x reader#enhypen#enhypen niki#enhypen au#jungwon#heeseung au#heeseung x reader#heeseung enhypen#heeseung fluff#heeseung imagines#heeseung scenarios#lee heeseung#park jongseong angst#jongseong fluff#jongseong x reader#jongseong park#jongseong imagines#park jongseong fluff#park jongseong x reader#park jongseong imagines#sim jaeyun x reader#sim jaeyun fluff#sim jaeyun imagines#sim jaeyun fic#jake sim
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Y'all, I cant XD sometimes you run Into super horrifying stuff about how evil Israel is, and other times, you run into a serious video that's so weird you can't help laugh.
So I just ran into a video about how evil Zionists are, and the video goes like this:
A friendly man with a chanukiya tattoo on his back is walking through like a hallway locker room thing, he's being friendly, nodding his head/saying hello to all the dudes in the hallway, everyone is happy saying hi to the friendly man, until their eyes shift downward, in the direction of his crotch (I'm sorry but that's what it looked like) and their faces darken.
This guy continues to his locker, to which he pulls out a white jacket with an Israeli flag on it. He looks up and sees all the dudes he was friendly with cracking their knuckles, and looking like they wanna fight. They all approach him, circling him as they run their hands over his jacket, smearing a red paste looking thing all over it, one by one they coat his jacket In red, than they leave.
The guy looks down at his"bloodied" hands and jacket, and we see droplets of blood on the floor by his feet.
Here's a lil screenshot
This video was obviously, trying to say that all Zionists are evil murderers, but ironically, I feel it delivers the opposite message.
Maybe it's just to me, but there's something so familiar at this point about being a nice person, but getting shat on for being Israeli.
This guy was shown to be a lovely person, but just because of his nationality, or his support of Israel he's automatically labeled as a murderer, even though his only sin was his ethnicity. And also the fact the the first thing we see is the chanukiya tattoo on his neck.
This video is blantently antisemitic, it's not even trying to hide it.
This video showcases how no matter how much people would like you, no matter how good you are, no matter how nice, everyone will hate you simply for being a Jew.
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so let me get this straight. elon musk retweeted or tweeted an antisemitic comment (because he's an antisemitic asshole from a very antisemitic country south africa) and he was critizised to the point that he took a trip to israel to like reflect and learn about how jews don't eat babies or whatever. but...
Ta-Nehisi Coates, an antisemitic asshole who's antisemitic dad also publishes antisemitic books just one's he's too lazy to write, says in person, recorded on video, without retraction.... that he would join in on the rape, murder, infanticide, and kidnapping of jews, if given the chance... and trevor noah (from very antisemitic country south africa) agreed whole heartedly and adding that it's like the american revolution.... which implies that isreal rode into gaza and lebanon ans was dictating how those countries operate and taking taxes which is WHAT IRAN DOES THROUGH HAMAS AND HEZBOLLAH ALONG WITH THE RAPES AND MURDERS... but there's no media outlet saying that might be kind of fucked up and maybe they should apologize or some vague insincere bullshit... I'm sorry?
and also Christopher Columbus... THE symbol for Catholics in America (which is why we that monster even got his own day. literally catholics, the knights of columbus, wanted a celebration of how interconnected the united states and CATHOLICS are) the Christopher columbus with MASSIVE statues around the globe in portugal, spain, america, italy... that guy is now jewish, just like hitler, because .... he has some jewish DNA. and we are just disregarding his recorded actions, relationship to the church, his very catholic life, lifestyle, origins, and catholic life.
and all this during the jewish christmas/ramidan (because goyim don't know what the fuck our high holy days are even if that name alone should tell you exactly how important they are) ??
which idiots are these things for? who is watching the ta interview and saying to themselves, "boy i would love to read the book by the guy who loves murder and kidnapping and rape! what a leftist humanitarian!" or, "WOW! I hate christopher columbus I'm so glad i don't have to feel guilty as a christian that he was under orders by my church because he was obviously a jew going rouge. because i'm a leftist but also a devout catholic? which is a thing that is a totally consistent world view?"
Who asked for this? I don't think this kind of shit is even for antisemitic leftists anymore. this is for some kind of POC leftist white supremesist with white guilt but also an arab supremasist .... i guess that might describe one or two very mentally ill people but... like ... who? is this stuff to get rage clicks from jews? there aren't that many jews you guys. I have no fucking understanding of these people's world's view other than they hate jews. none of this makes sense in any other way than to attack and increase attacks on jews around the globe. it's so mentally confusing because none of these people are saying anything that benefits them in anyway, nothing that is smart or true, nothing that makes sense if it is not generated directly from the thought, "this will increase jew hate, so i should do it!"
these people are risking their careers, being hella racist about arabs generally and Palistinians specifically, making both jews and arabs less safe, saying inflammatory things they obviously spent very little time thinking about, for the chance to normalize antisemitism. what planet are these media orgs even living on? they don't sound like nazis, they sound like fucking delusional Qanon derps who are improving "the day of the storm" ironically like the segments they show on the daily show, with TREVOR NOAH.
it's like really... sad. like, these guys and scientist have wasted so many people's time and their own talents which people tell me they have i guess, but it's sad that this kind of libel from the media doesn't even make sense to people who don't live on twitter.
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There are so many naruto time travel fics out there but what I need SPECIFICALLY is an ANBU era team of Kakashi, Tenzo, Itachi, and Shisui getting flung into the founders era.
Like. Ok just looking from the political side of it that's;
A) 2 very young and VERY powerful Uchiha's (one of which is the future clan head!! Politics!!)
B) A very fucked up baby mokuton user who's still in the middle of being deprogrammed and can totally pass for Senju
C) The free wild card that is Hatake clan lore on top of having a stolen sharingan. On top of *that* him being the team leader of a team of kids who, in the time period context, should both be at eachothers throats and probably not be expected to obey the commands of someone not only from another clan but a way smaller one
Theres SO much potential there!! So many political implications in virtually ALL of the directions!!!!
Yk what as I'm typing this out I'm having ✨️ideas✨️ so let's make some story points to sort those out:
• I think itd be neat to have this happen like. A year? Ish? Before the massacre? So age wise, and full disclaimer I'm referencing Google and Wikipedia rn so I could totally be wrong, I think that's :
Kakashi (18)
Tenzo (17)
Itachi (12)
Shisui (15)
Could be wrong about the ages but honestly it's my world you're just living in it, so.
Then me going totally purely off of my own headcannons, were going to say they came in a about a year before Izuna died and place the founders ages as:
Madara (23)
Hashirama (23)
Izuna (19)
Tobirama (18)
Big fan of Tobirama being the youngest between the 4 but projecting the aura of someone as old as like. Idk, however old Madara is. Very funny to me, 10/10
• I'm personally a big fan of dogteeth kakashi so we're running with that all the way home. Also a huge fan of the "Hatake's are a distant, more feral cousin of Inuzuka clan" hc along with some sprinklings of "back in the day they had a bit of a Reputation(tm) for being a 'lill wild, and everyone generally tries to avoid them. Which isn't too much of a problem because theyre a very small out of the way clan from Iron, they just have a big reputation in contrast to their size.
In more modern times tho, along with (obviously) having dwindled down to a single depressed teenager, they've become a lot tamer over the years due to village life. Kakashi is a Hatake, 100%, but he is NOT up to the standards of this time. Which becomes a bit funny when people see him, go "oh FUCK it's a Hatake" and then start edging slowly towards the door like he's about to rip their throat out with his teeth. Meanwhile he's standing there like 🧍♂️"am I that ugly."
Give me a scene where, finally used to this reaction to him from the general shinobi population, the team starts to use it to their advantage.
"Give us the scroll or we'll let the Hatake off the leash to have his fun with you. He's been awfully hungry latley you know, hasn't had fresh meat in days"
Kakashi, feeling kind of stupid, gave his best growl.
It caused an almost immediate, embaressed flush to rise to his face, but he didn't let up. It sounded more like an almost pathetic puppy growl than anything to his ears, but apparently it was enough to convince the trembling enemy nin because he slowly lifted the scroll up in offering.
Wow. Now he couldn't tell if he was embaressed for himself or for this guy.
Probably both to be honest.
• So like. Itachi is the clan heir. That's big. That's important. Let's do something with that.
First off, I had a great time reading this one fic (tho I don't even remember what the fic itself was about now, oops) where a plot point of it was how Sasuke is just a walking stereotype of main house Uchiha. Like people look at him and they don't just go "oh that's an Uchiha." They go "oh fuck that's an UCHIHA Uchiha." He's so fucking painfully, obviously related to the very tippy top of the clan that anyone not blind can tell. It's in the way he looks, it's in the way he talks and treats those around him, it's in the way he fucking holds himself. You look at him and every other stereotype about the Uchiha clan is there in big, bold letters. (On top of that he's also a dead wringer for Izuna, which I'm such a sucker for and desperatley wish people would do more with)
So like let's give that to Itachi here because it's so fun for several reasons.
First off; Sasuke in this is like. Straight up a doppelganger of Izuna, just a few generations apart. They could be twins. Itachi, as I'm sure you are aware, is Sasuke's big brother. So let's take some liberties and say that Itachi could absoloutley pass as a blood sibling to Izuna and Madara.
He is however 12, so we're also going to say that the only people who get to make this connection is anyone who's seen the siblings when they were also at a similar age.
On top of that however he has the 'walking amalgamation of all the stereotypes of the main Uchiha house' so anyone who isn't blind will look at him and assume he's somewhere in the sphere of 'important main house person' tho who really knows how distant the relation may be exactly. No one !! That's who !!!
Second; He's the fucking clan heir!! What the fuck!! This bit would have the most impact after all the messy time travel reveals when things have settled down a bit, so it'll sit in the back pocket for a bit. Save it for some fun shaking up later down the line so we don't run out of all the fun reveals too fast and bore the readers, yk?
When it is brought up tho it'd be fun to maybe have some fucky Itachi and Madara mutual understandings of the way things work.
• So. Madara is like a bit of a scary bed time story to Uchiha children, right? Like. "Ooo make sure you don't get too obsessive or fall too deep into your grief and always stay loyal to the village or you'll end up just like Madara!!"
Something something Uchiha-Village relationships are tense as hell, something something Madara fucking over a lot of the clan with his whole. Everything., Something something scapegoat and old stories, something something 'people have probably been talking a lot more about how "god dammit this all started with Madara" in recent years.'
Now with that in mind let's take a look of what our time travelers think of Madara:
Itachi is a good Konoha soldier. Itachi (as has been very much fucking proven) would rather beat a possible problem before it even exists with a hammer till it dies an ugly bloody death than even RISK it blossoming into a proper problem. Itachi does not like Madara. Itachi personally, quietly thinks they should maybe wait till the village is formed then carefully arrange a little accident for him before he goes off the rails. He, even more quietly, maybe even thinks it would be a kindness. Allow him to be remembered well by the village instead of scorned.
Shisui I think is cautiously optimistic about him. He's the kind of guy who gives the benefit of the doubt, who weighs the options, risk and reward, but includes things like hope and compassion in his calculations. Yes, Madara was a uhh. Thing. That happened. But in every story his big blow up always come from one specific event; Izuna's death. So if they stop that from happening, wouldn't it secure both a better future for them and Madara? The history books never went into detail about Izuna, he doesn't know what he's like, but maybe his involvement in the future, on Konoha's side, could lead to even more profits for them long term. At the end of the day he's not against killing Madara (though to be clear, they are at first operating on trying to avoid all interactions with historical events and return home without touching things) but it'd be nice, to manage to get a happy ending for everyone. Unrealistic maybe, but nice.
Mmmm hear me out actually, maybe Shisui, after interacting with him a bit, finds that Madara reminds him of Itachi too. They definatley both have that "I would do unspeakable things to even dream of my loved just one more time" energy, if you know what I mean
Anyways; Kakashi and Tenzo are both neutral on Madara. Yes, they learned about how he betrayed the village when young just like everyone else, but they weren't getting the bed time stories and "do this and you'll end up just like him" warnings like the Uchiha's. They're possibly leaning into negative but are detached from the situation enough to just go "well he hasn't done it yet and his brother is still alive so he won't any time soon" and be done with it
• Now, on the the total opposite side of the spectrum you have Hashirama and Tobirama. People are brought up in Konoha to fucking IDOLIZE these guys. You can not tell me our team of time travelers wouldn't be at least a little awed to speak with them.
I think Tenzo would be the most wide eyed about Hashirama, both for the baseline "holy shit that's the Shodai Hokage" and also that fun juicy mokuton user imposter syndrome he has going on for him. That guys DNA is inside his body!!! Holy shit wait does that mean if someone did a blood relation test with them he might read as being related to him?? Fuck were gonna pocket that for now but like. Mmmmm potential.
I'd say Itachi is the most hesitant about Tobirama but again, village loyalist, so.
You know what tho maybe Shisui is the most hesitant about him (though still largely positive) he both def grew up looking up to him but can also see the anti-Uchiha policies people inact now with the implications that Tobirama would have approved of it. He doesn't know if he would, but like, he has to wonder.
Kakashi is probably the most normal about them (and also has experience in being close to a hokage (Minato) to know that at the end of the day they are painfully human) Don't get me wrong, he's still in some sort of awe! He might get a little lightheaded at the thought of seeing the God of Shinobi in proper battle, or the possibility to see the famed genius of Tobirama with all the different jutsu's he's invented. You can't tell me Kakashi didn't spend a little extra time reading about him when he was trying to make Chidori. Honestly I'm gonna roll with that and say he had a bit of a phase as a kid where he was a total fan boy. Maybe sprinkle in the good old HalfHatake!Tobirama hc to add some faint daydreams a lonley babykashi had after his father's death, about getting to meet him as family. Like cmon, little genius idolizing and projecting on some big history figure only to find out they're actually related? Can you say potential?
Anyways he did eventually grow out of the phase, probably got unattached to it all and lost interest after the whole "losing everything he loved" bit of his life. And at the end of the day, he doesn't have any real complex personal hang ups on the founders like the others do. Thus, most normal.
• And then my favorite most special boy, Izuna !! He's for sure the one they're all most neutral about. He's not actually taught about in the academy? There's probably some throw away line about him in some history books somewhere, but he died young and was quickly buried by the looming shadow of Konoha. The only real knowledge had about him in modern times is just a vague "Yeah he got killed by Tobirama which lead to peace being made but also lead to Madara losing his shit"
Poor Izuna he's the linchpin for it all but was left an unremarkable footnote of history. My boy deserves so much better
Tenzo doesn't actually even know who he is, that boy got bare minimum education under Danzo and Izuna was NOT included.
Itachi and Shisui mmmaybe have some small little fun fact here or there buried in stories from the older members of the clans but like. It's gonna amount to just "yeah he had a great katon" and thats about it.
I WILL SAY HOWEVER. Itachi sees him and instantly is that one PTSD dog meme. Sasuke is a BABY but holy shit Izuna looks exactly like he'd expect him to grow up as and it's making him FEEL THINGS. Also he's so bratty little brother coded !! He's an entire 7 years older than Itachi but Ifachi keeps fucking up and trying to big brother him it's embaressing.
And ofc Itachi didn't go into the first meeting thinking he'd see some weird older mirror version of his beloved baby brother who he misses and worries about very very much. So like. There's for sure going to be some conflict there. If their first meeting is a scuffle (which it probably will be) I think Itachi would keep hesitating to attack. On full run away mode. Which is probably for the best bc he shouldn't try to fight Izuna anyways honey he's like double your bodyweight and you're strong but you aren't THAT strong.
• Pointing back at both the 'Itachi does not like Madara and has quiet thoughts about how it'd possibly be in everyone's interest to just kill him' and the 'Itachi and Madara quietly bond over being clain head/heir during stressful times (w pressure from the elders especially)
I can see 2 outcomes of a potential bonding conversation with them:
1) They come to understand eachother better.
Madara wants to be on good terms, he looks at this kid and sees one of his brothers eyes and the others quiet determination. He can tell Itachi doesn't like him for some reason, and it's frustrating because he doesn't know why. He wants him to like him. He wants to be able to offer his hand and have it taken. It hurts, to be looked at with such suspicion from a face that has traces of Izuna's.
Meanwhile Itachi . . . Itachi looks at Madara and he sees someone who gets it. Gets it like no one ever has. It scares him. He looks up at this man, this horror story he's been told to fear becoming, and he sees himself. And this realization shakes him. It makes him think, makes him wonder. He's so, so sure of his loyalty to Konoha. More sure than he is of anything else in the world. But . . . But if something happened to Sasuke, if he had to choose—
And maybe it softens something in him too, along with the (honestly healthy) dose of fear. It forms a little crack in his shell, just enough to maybe, maybe let Madara through. Just a hair.
Or 2) we pull one of those "The conversation ends with them agreeing verbally but mentally they're on 2 VERY different notes."
Madara, nodding and looking at Itachi meaningfully: "Yeah it can be hard, but all we can really do is try to make the world a safer place for the ones we love. (To create Konoha, to keep my clan safe. Izuna safe. And now to keep you safe too.)
Itachi, nodding slowly: "Yeah. No matter how hard it is (even though I think I understand you more than anyone else Ive ever met) we have to try to make the world a safer place (by killing you in your sleep once Konoha is formed) for the ones we love (My clan. My village. Sasuke.)"
• Also pointing back at the 'Hatake warring clan era reputation,' the 'Tobirama is half Hatake' and also now pointing at Tobirama's title as the White Demon. Small thing but it'd be neat if there was some small throw away line that the nickname lowkey started in part because of the absoloutley terrifying reputation of the Hatake combined with Tobirama's own Everything(tm) like it just had some influence on how some view him. Give me Uchiha's making dog jokes ab him it'll be funny
• Ok but now the actual plot thoughts. Yeah I know I kept you waiting sorry about that.
So time travel! Probably due to a mission gone wrong. Some ruins or some ancient crumbling scroll that wasn't even supposed to do fucking time travel but was so old and corroded that it somehow managed to transform into a whole other seal by pure bad luck. Or good luck I guess, considering it could have just turned into a nuke.
Our favorite team of disasters are very very alarmed !!! What the fuck !!! Obviously they don't default to thinking time travel, but they immediatley know something is wrong. The landscape has changed, though the big landmarks are still there. The mission was complete anyways with no injuries so they just retreat to Konoha. Only oops !! It's not fucking there!!!
Queue alarm.
Shisui is the first one to suggest time travel because he's quirky like that. And there's a very easy way to confirm this theory.
(Also we're going to say that Konoha's location is a valley a few miles out from the Naka River that borders the Senju / Uchiha territories.)
This is convenient because that verification method involves checking in on where Itachi and Shisui know the old Uchiha compound should rest.
They do it in full stealth mode, the second they saw Konoha was missing Kakashi as team leader decided they'd treat the land as enemy territory. They all agreed ofc, for all they knew this WAS enemy territory now.
And, ofc, yeah!! There's the old Uchiha compound!! Being active!!! There are people there!!!
"What are the odds Fugaku-sama decided to have the clan return to their homeland for ahh, cultural enrichment?" Kakashi asked weakly.
"Time travel." Was the only reply he got from Shisui, whispered reverently as the boy vibrated with excitement on the branch.
Itachi just gave him a look, radiating a level of dissaproving disbelief that no normal 12 year old should be able to make. Kakashi would know, he was that not-normal 12 year old once.
From there they decide a no interference policy. Hands off guys!! They probably debate it tho, like, a good amount. They all have ✨️opinions✨️ except maybe Tenzo who's lowkey still in the middle of trying to learn how to be a person and is following Kakashi's lead 99% of the time. Especially since they're still in mission mode and this is like a super serious discussion and he really does know the least ab the founders overall.
They probably debate the merits of going to Uzushiogakure bc seal help but it's really far and they don't actually have like, just any leverage with them. They already decided not to fuck with the future so it isn't like they can trade secrets and warnings. At least if shit happens here they have some plausible deniability, being, yk, 2 uchiha's and a senju-passing guy with Mokuton. Kakashi's kinda fucked tho in that regard but he isn't going to be doing the party ANY favors with his clan heritage.
Which means it's time to potentially get desperate enough to interact with Tobirama !!! Which will inevitably lead to them bumping into a Uchiha patrol or something!!! I don't know honestly
• Anyways want Hashirama and Tenzo to interact. He has so many issues like holy shit. Let Hashirama give him the hug he deserves. I want him to violently adopt him. New brother acquired!!!
I said before but Tenzo is still reprogramming from ROOT. Let Hashirama impact that! Let him help! They can make flower crowns and photosynthesize together idk
Hashirama would be so happy to have another mokuton user, I think they should be able to sense eachother extra strong and like 'ping' off of eachothers chakra, it'll be fun
▪︎ I'm not thinking toooo hard about power scaling and this is fanfiction so a) don't quote me on this and b) for the love of all that is holy don't take my words as gospel
But for this fic specifically I'm ranking the founders and Team Ro, weakest to strongest (in a clean, fair fight head on w no time to prepare) :
Itachi (he's fucking 12 guys. But also he is like. FRACTIONS under Tenzo and Shisui. If he were 13 I'd let him be above or at the same level but like. He's 12. Cmon.)
Tenzo - Shisui (they're like JUST under the next 2 tho like seconds behind)
Izuna - Tobirama
Kakashi ( by the skin of his fucking teeth and the advantage that is his stupid amount of jutsu's and lack of self preservation)
Madara - Hashirama
And again that's not counting like. The specific situations, time given to prepare, potential dirty tricks they could play (I think the Konoha tricks would play a fraction dirtier than the others, who are slightly more used to big open battles vs the ANBU squad who does all sorts of shit in all sorts of places) plus like. Mental state and team ups.
Tenzo or Shisui couldn't take down Izuna or Tobirama but if they teamed up I'd allow it. Kakashi would get his ass kicked by Hashirama or Madara but he could survive a minutes longer than the others would
Itachi is doing his best
But like
He's 12 guys
I love him and he is terrifyingly competent but he won't win 1 on 1 with anyone unless he has some sort of advantage. Minus Shisui and Tenzo who he does have the advantage of regularly fighting, so.
• I think they do get to go back home in the end. It takes a ton of work tho and they probably do need to get Mito's help with it, Kakashi can show them the seal they got brought here with but it's an ACTUAL one in a trillion miracle it didn't fucking atomize them. So it needs a lot of touch ups
Anyways !!!
I have a little more rattling around in my brain but I'm really tired and also starting to think about other things now so I'm gonna stop here. Might come back and add to it later so stay tuned if you're into that
Full disclaimer I'm not gonna write this. I don't have the proper energy and it'd probably end up being too ambitious of a project if I tried. I'd love to see it happen tho, so like !! Big open invitation to absoloutley anyone who might want to take even a fraction of the ideas I've listed.
@ me if you do tho I wanna see the final product
#birds fic talk#time travel AU#Naruto#dogteeth kakashi#kakashi hatake#itachi uchiha#shisui uchiha#uchiha#hatake#yamato tenzo#tenzo#team ro#madara uchiha#uchiha madara#hatake kakashi#uchiha itachi#uzhiha izuna#izuna#tobirama senju#hashirama senju#senju#naruto founders#founders era#naruto time travel#naruto fanfiction#warring states period#mito#uzumaki mito#mito uzumaki#hatake clan lore
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