#also no do not use this as a ticket to send some hate asks to MDHWrites

[flower-boi16]

I would like to ask what your opinion is on MDHWrites's blog, or some of his most comprehensive takes criticizing the show at large, for he's covered a lot of ground. What is your regard for his opinions, if you have seen it.

The second I saw this ask pop up in my inbox my thought was "should I even answer this?". On one hand, I would like to express my opinions on Writes' TOH takes since I have er...strong feelings about some of them, but on the other hand part of me still feels a bit iffy about it.

For my 200+ followers who don't know who tf this anon is talking about; MDHWrites is a tumblr user who makes a heavy amount of posts critisizing TOH, he's kind of the most well-known TOH critic on this site, at least in the TOH critical commuinity (and yes, TOH has a critical commuinity).

I remember once randomly stumbling across Writes' blog when I was new to tumblr and first discovered that critical tags were a thing and I started reading some of his posts. I don't remember exactly what all the posts I read said but I do vaguely remember some of the points Writes' made in the posts.

This was at a time where I kinda just accepted critisicm of things I liked rather than actually thinking about the validetly of the takes, and since Writes' posts sounded proffesional enough (and because I went on the toh critical tag and watched videos critisizing the show WAY too much) I think I kinda just forgot why I liked the show in the first place...? I know that sounds weird but I first watched TOH when I was 13 (I'm 14 now) and my analysis skills were still developing at the time.

A couple of months later after I rewatched The Owl House and fell back in love with the show leading me to grow an attatchment to it that was stronger than ever before I thought back to Writes' posts and decided to revist his blog and read a handful of posts out of curiosity to see what his points were. And...I thought going in that there might be some good points about the show but...I can't really say I agree with any of his takes.

While I don't Writes' TOH takes are Lily Orchard levels of infuriatingly media illiterate, and Writes' doesn't look like a bad person...I don't think his TOH takes are that good. They sounded professional at first but everytime I think about them I notice more holes. That's all I'm going to say. I don't want to cover Writes' TOH takes in detail because I know some might alert him of this post, he'll see it and I'll end up starting an argument I don't really want that.

I guess I'll just say that I think his comments about the understood scene in the posts I read feel like he completely missed the point of it. The scene is meant to be a moment of realization for Luz of what she truely wanted, it's not intended to be a "character finish" and just because she realized what ultimately wanted doesn't mean that her self-loathing and guilt of helping Belos is just going to go away.

He even goes as far as to say it doesn't matter to Luz as a character in his post about filler in TOH, where he labled several episodes that are extremely important for outside context as "filler" by the standards of the general commuinity that complains about Amphibia's filler (that post is a whole other can of worms that I don't want to get into) which is just....baffling.

I could also get into things like Writes' takes on Luz's depression arc or his post about Waffles or his post about grom factor (a fan comic by moringmark) but again I don't want to say anymore things here beyond that.

I just don't agree with most of the takes that Writes has on the show. I will say sometimes he makes interesting points like his post about why the boiling isles woulden't work as a setting to a sequel series which does raise some valid points and his analysis of Boscha's "redemption" on my post that he reblogged was fairly interesting (though his reasons for Luz reaching out to the collector not making any sense weren't valid to me) but overall I don't care for his TOH takes.

[thisapplepielife]

Written for @steddiesongfics.

Fan Mail

June Prompt: Song By Blondie | Word Count: 876 | Rating: T | Characters: Steve, Robin, Eddie | CW: Language | Tags: Future Fic, Canon Divergence, No Upside Down, Steve "I'm a Big Fan" Harrington, Platonic Stobin

For a song by Blondie, I picked Fan Mail.

The crumpled ball of paper hits the wall, banking off and falling straight into the trash can. At least his aim is good, even if his writing isn't. Steve looks up at the poster over his desk, and sighs. He's fucking pathetic. Seriously, is his plan really that he's gonna write Eddie "The Freak" Munson with some, what, fan mail? Yeah, that's a great fucking plan. 

Hi, remember me? We went to high school together. I was a bit of a dick, but I'm hoping you've forgotten that. You're pretty hot up on that stage. Call me.

Yeah, right. 

He's definitely aborting this mission. It was a stupid idea, anyway.

A few weeks later, Steve pulls a stack of letters out of the mailbox. Bill, bill, junk, junk, bill…and then his stomach drops with dread. A red envelope, with the Corroded Coffin logo drawn in the corner, where the return address should be.

What the fuck? No, seriously, what the fuck?

Steve takes it to the kitchen counter and sits it down, filled with dread. He didn't lose his mind and actually mail one of those goddamn letters, right? Surely he'd remember doing something as unhinged as that. 

He wants to open it, but he also really doesn't want to know what's inside.

So, it sits. For an hour, a day, a week.

It sits until Robin swings by one day, and picks it up like the Nosey Nellie she is, "What's this, dingus?"

Steve reaches for it, trying to grab it from her grubby little hands, "Nothing!"

"It doesn't sound like it's nothing," she crows, and holds it behind her back. 

"Robin, give it to me," he warns, low and pissy. If he opens it, it's gonna be on his own terms. And that's a big if. As long as he leaves it alone, he'll never have to know what's inside. Good, bad or ugly.

"Why haven't you opened it? Maybe it's important," she says, "maybe it's from Eddie."

And he knows. He suddenly knows exactly what's happened here, and he's gonna kill her.

"What the fuck did you do?" he asks, eyes narrowed.

"What you were too chickenshit to," she says, and she presses the envelope to his chest.

"Goddamnit, Robin," Steve says, feeling embarrassed and sick, "they weren't, I wasn't, ready."

Robin's eyes soften, "I know you, Steve. You'd never be ready."

She's not wrong, she's not, but still. She shouldn't have done this to him. It could be classified as a hate crime, he's pretty sure. And maybe even tampering with the U.S. mail. That's a federal offense. He could have her prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.

"Quit daydreaming about my demise, and just open it. Then you can kill me if you need to," she says, and he nods, sliding onto the stool at the counter. 

He slides his thumb under the flap of the envelope and tugs, ripping it open, pulling out the letter. When he unfolds it, two tickets fall onto the counter and Robin reaches for them, and he just lets her. 

And he reads. 

It's short, and funny, and not as embarrassing as he'd feared. Eddie seems happy to have heard from him, and the two tickets are an invitation. It seems casual, but Steve knows better.

Holy shit.

He's actually made a fucking pass at Eddie Munson, and he seems to have made one back? What is happening right now? For real. 

"Well?" Robin asks, bouncing on the balls of her feet, impatient. 

"He invited me, us, to their show in Indy next month."

"See? I told you it'd be fine, dingus," she says, and he nods.

He spins on his chair, to face her full-on, "What version did you send?"

Steve suddenly needs to know how embarrassed he needs to be right now.

"The least stalkerish one, I swear," she says, "and I included a note from me, so he'd know, you weren't exactly aware it was being mailed."

That's probably more embarrassing, he thinks. Like he was just sitting there, pining, like a fool, and his best friend had to intervene.

Eddie must think he's the fucking freak, now. 

The tickets are good. Really good, Steve has suddenly realized, as they stand right next to the stage. They aren't front and center, more off to the side, but still. Right there. Front row. Where Eddie will definitely be able to see them, and know they came, if he just looks down.

And he does. 

As soon as he hits the stage, he comes right to their side, squats down, and reaches out to hand Steve something. Steve's frozen, eyes locked on Eddie's, so it's Robin's hand that reaches out and takes the folded up piece of paper he's offering.

Once Eddie's gone from in front of them, taking his spot center stage and getting the show started, Robin is unfolding the piece of paper. 

Steve leans over her shoulder, and it's dark. Nearly too dark to read, but it's fan mail. Right back. Talking about how he'd always liked looking at him, too, back in high school.

That he'd like to look at him a little bit more after the show tonight, if Steve is interested.

Oh.

Steve is definitely interested.

If you want to write your own, or see more entries for this challenge, pop on over to @steddiesongfics and follow along with the fun! 🎶

[daengtokki]

𝒯𝒽𝒾𝓇𝒹 𝒟𝒶𝓉𝑒

Kim Seungmin/Female Reader

wc: 8.5k

rating: mature/explicit ಇ

comments: part three was heavily edited from it's original version. There are most likely some grammatical errors that I've glossed over from staring at the screen for so long. Feel free to send a message and let me know if you see anything wildly wrong.

→ PART ONE

→ PART TWO

Part 3 of 4

“You can’t be nervous if I’m nervous.”

He’s right. You take a deep breath and turn to face him again. Kiss him on the lips. Your free hand snakes around his waist, finds the hem of his shirt, and tucks underneath to run over his skin.

His muscles tighten for a second, then slowly relax as your hand moves upward against his side and back across his shoulder blade. He sighs as you touch him.

You haven’t felt this much of his body until now.

-

Your plane lands four hours later than scheduled. You’re tired, hungry, and your back is killing you. Korea Air is fine, and it always has been, but 13 hours in coach is something you’ll never get used to.

There were no plans to travel home up until three days ago, and it’s a miracle you got the week off to deal with your family. As much as you hate doing it, you don’t mind a change of scenery and a break from your typical work days in Korea.

Honestly, this is the perfect solution to the loneliness and monotony. It was only three weeks ago that you finally got to see Seungmin again, but it’s been a long three weeks. And he has kept his promise of keeping in touch.

Every single day since date number two, he's sent at least one text. You try to send messages only when he does, but occasionally you can’t help yourself, and you send something in the middle of your work day, or right before you go to bed. You’re still a little worried about being a bother, and holding back your clingy-ness has been difficult, but he always sends something back. Not always right away, but he does answer. And he sends selfies often—those texts are your favorite.

You have failed to mention that you’ve been on your way to Chicago (he sent a text about two hours ago, letting you know the first two shows had gone well), and that you’d be arriving the day before he would also be in the same city. But you’ll let him know soon. You don’t have much hope for getting to see him while you’re both here; he’s busy, and the last thing you want to do is bother him during a tight schedule. But he's been the only thing on your mind for weeks.

You managed to get a ticket to the Chicago concert the night you realized you be in town for it, but it wasn’t cheap. Even if you don’t get to see him alone, seeing him on stage will be worth the price.

____

“Who are you talking to?”

There’s a giggle in his ear, and a sharp chin lands on his shoulder. “Why are you smiliiing?”

IN grabs Seungmin’s shoulders and takes a seat directly behind him, giving him a good view of the phone in his friends hands.

“Don’t be nosy.”

“Is it the girl you’ve been talking to?”

Seungmin half turns and stares at IN, then looks him up and down, “What are you talking about?”

IN stares back wordlessly, a grin plastered on his face. He’s squinting his eyes at him accusingly. “I’m talking about the girl you’re always texting.”

Seungmin picks up his iced coffee, takes a sip, then releases himself from IN’s stare.

IN follows him across the room.

“Send her a cute selfie.”

“I already did.”

“Oh, haha!” He beams with pride at thinking he got him to slip up. “Did she send one back? Can I see her?”

“No. And no.”

“I won’t tell anyone else, I promise.”

“How did you know if nobody else knows?”

IN stops and thinks for a moment, then he side-eyes the other two members that are currently in the same room. They’re too far away to hear the conversation, but Seungmin stands and heads over to them.

“Chan?”

Chan turns and looks at him with a smile. He doesn’t get a chance to speak before Seungmin does.

“Did you tell IN about her?”

It takes him a few seconds to process what he’s being asked. “No, no…I didn’t tell anyone.” his voice lowers as he realizes what they’re talking about.

“How does he know?”

Chan peaks around him at IN, who’s already staring wide eyed. He beckons him over with two fingers, and he runs over, unbothered.

“How do you know?” He asks softly, very curiously. “I didn’t tell you.”

“I just guessed.”

Seungmin and Chan stare, speechless.

“I always see him smiling and laughing while he’s texting, and then taking selfies. I didn’t know he was actually texting…” he looks around at the others that just walked into the room. “…texting someone.” He whispers the last part.

“The less people that know, the better…” Chan says, but casually, as if he knows he doesn’t really have to tell IN. “It’s nothing serious, right Seungmin?”

“Huh…” he feels his phone buzz in his pocket. “Oh um, no…it’s not.”

Chan stares a little longer, “is it?”

Seungmin feels like his mind is being read. “We just talk a lot.”

He nods and leaves it at that. IN smiles at Seungmin once more before walking off. Then he pulls his phone out to check his notification.

Sounds like you guys had a good time. I did catch some fan videos from last night!

He smiles at the text, and then wonders what you’re doing up at four in the morning.

____

You pull out your phone, hoping the buzz in your pocket is him.

What are you doing up so late? Are you okay?

Oh, you forgot about the time difference. Maybe it’s time to let him know you’re not in Korea.

“I’m okay. I just landed in Chicago. I had a family thing come up, and I had to come home. I promise I’m not following you.”

You see him typing a few seconds after your message is delivered.

oh, you’re from Chicago! That’s so exciting that you’re here. Are you coming to the concert tomorrow night? Please come!

Before you have time to reply, he’s typing again…

Maybe not if you have family to see

“No, I’ll be there. I wouldn’t miss it”

let me know what seats you have…maybe I can get you closer

You’re trying to text him and stuff your bags into the trunk of you moms car at the same time.

“I don’t think they’re very close, but I’ll let you know as soon as I get home”

don’t worry, I’ll figure something out

“What are you so smiley about?” Your mom asks and slams the trunk shut.

“Just a text.”

____

“Sooo…”

“Soooo what?” Seungmin glances at IN. He has an inkling about what he’s getting at, and he’s trying not to indulge him too much. But Seungmin will admit that if any of them were going to find out prematurely, he's glad it was him.

“Can I see her?” He’s careful and quiet saying it. “Please?”

“Fine, give me a second.” He types a quick message and then pulls up the photos you’ve both shared. He finds one of the very few selfies you’ve sent him and shoves it a few inches from IN’s face.

He looks and his eyes widen, smirk grows. “Oh she’s not…” he stops himself and lowers his excited voice, “she’s not Korean? Oh she sent a text.” He giggled and tries to finish reading before Seungmin pulls the phone back.

“No, she’s not.”

“Where is she from?”

“Chicago. She’s here now, too.”

“Oh she’s gonna come see us tomorrow!”

Seungmin nods and types, “yeah, she is coming. I need to get her a better seat.”

“Sneak her into soundcheck.“

____

The next morning, you wake up to the buzzing of a text notification. A Seungmin message. You open it up and squint through sleepy, jet-lagged eyes. It’s barely 8 am. You slept an entire ten hours, at least.

Good morning 🤍 if you’re able to, come down to the venue at around 2!

A close-up selfie follows. You can only see his eye, a peace sign, and a little bit of hair.

And a heart emoji. That combination is a first.

You reply, set an alarm, and immediately fall back asleep.

And luckily, you don’t sleep through it. At eleven, you’re up, nervous, showered, more nervous, and then when it’s time to figure out your wardrobe, you feel like you’re going to puke. Knowing you’ll see Seungmin is keeping most of your nerves at bay, but the fact that it’ll be at an arena of this size, with this many people (you assume there will be a massive amount of fans already hanging around that early, because you know how concerts here are), and throw in the possibility of meeting his friends…you’re nervous.

____

It’s as busy near the venue as you expected. And you find yourself enjoying it, surprisingly. Seeing all of the fans gathered around and clearly having a good time, despite the heat, is nice.

You jump out of your Uber and send a text to Seungmin. You need a more accurate location to head to, but for now you don’t mind wandering around and people watching. Just a glance at someone seems to immediately give away their favorite member, and you make it a point to look for anyone who prefers your favorite.

A text message buzzes before you get too far.

there is a staff entrance at the box office, just walk in and pretend like you belong

That sounds like a terrible idea, but you trust him and head in that direction. It’s not very busy there, because the tickets have long since sold out, but there are staff members milling around. You don’t look like you belong, but you also know that attitude and demeanor can get you far, so…

____

Seungmin only mentioned his plan (IN’s, really) to Chan about ten minutes prior to his last message to you.

“I don’t know if that was the best idea,” he says. “Is she already here?”

“Yes, she’s somewhere outside. And I know.”

“Okay, I might have a solution. Wait here.”

Chan disappears for a few minutes, and in the meantime, Seungmin actually starts to feel a little nervous. His plan was simple: have you walk casually in through the staff entrance he’s already seen used many times that days, by many different people—some with and some without staff shirts or lanyards.

“Even if she gets in using your terrible plan,” Chan returns, and behind him is a man much larger and taller than either of them. “She can’t walk around alone or with you the entire time.”

“She gets her own bodyguard!”

“Chaperone. And she won’t look too out of place with him. “

“Thanks, Chan. Thank you, Jay.”

“No problem, buddy. Let’s go find her before she gets lost.” Jay pats Seungmin on the back and leads him down the hallway. “What does she look like?”

It’s a long walk toward the entrance, but both of them scan every person and group as they pass by. It gives the butterflies in his stomach more time to move up to his chest and throat.

“She’s right there!” Seungmin waves and gets your attention before approaching. He doesn’t want to make a scene, so he waits until none of the venue staff is around.

You have a hard time containing yourself when you finally catch sight of him. You don’t remember him ever smiling as wide as he is right now, and it makes your legs tremble a little.

You wave and wait for him to reach you.

“Hey…” Seungmin stands a few feet from you. He seems a little uneasy.

The man following behind him is obviously trying to keep some distance, but not too much distance. “I can turn away if it makes you both more comfortable.”

“No Jay, you’re fine,” Seungmin laughs but doesn’t look away from you.

“Is this your bodyguard?”

“He is, actually. But today he’s going to hang out with you so you don’t look out of place, and you have someone who knows what’s going on.”

“Oh, that's a relief.”

“But I’ll take you to our dressing room if you’d like…if you want to meet everyone."

"I'm...I do, but do you think it's too much? I mean, too much too soon?"

"Meeting them?" He thinks about it. His mouth is pushed to one side, puffing up his cheek. "I don't mind if you want to wait. We can always just go right out by the stage for soundcheck. You'll see them out there, they'll probably see you. You'll be a mystery."

"I like that idea. Maybe afterward I'll feel better about it."

He nods and waves Jay over. He still hasn’t taken his eyes off of you.

“You look nice.” He lowers his voice and and drops his gaze to the floor. But you can still see his smile.

____

You’re sitting a few rows back from the main stage. Your chaperone is a few yards away and much more relaxed out here. There are so many people working the sound check that your extra face is hardly out of place, so now you feel like you can relax and enjoy the view.

All eight of them are on stage, along with a few band members, and some techs. There’s a camera filming everything just off stage, and another directly on stage with them. You watch Seungmin as he interacts with it. He looks relaxed and happy. No more worry in his eyes.

You get out the earplugs he gave you, but for now you just enjoy listening to him speak into his mic and headset. He looks at you a few times, but subtly, trying not to direct too much attention.

One of the others keeps looking your way, you assume out of confusion or curiosity. Or both. It’s Lee Know. You watch as he walks along the edge of the stage closest to where you’re sitting. Another member joins him and looks out; this one is smiling, almost as wide as Seungmin smiled at you earlier. You know who everyone is thanks to the endless videos you've watched. It's IN.

You try not to make too much eye contact, but you don’t avoid them completely. They seem to know who you are.

Your chaperone appears next to again and takes a seat, “having a good time?”

“I am, thank you for dealing with me.”

“No problem, anything for these boys.”

“Do you know them well?”

“I’ve been working with them for a while now, so I’d say I do. How’d a girl like you meet Mr. Kim?”

The Mr. Kim is said with a bit of sarcasm, but a cute, playful sarcasm. And by a girl like you, you assume he means an American.

“I live in Korea, near where he grew up. We met through a friend. Do we seem like a weird match? I mean…we’re not a couple—"

“Are you sure about that? He’s looking at you right now with those big puppy dog eyes.”

Jay points up to Seungmin. When you look, he quickly smiles and waves before running back to the center of the stage.

____

Your adrenaline is off the charts at the end of the concert. You had an idea of what to expect from footage of other concerts, but being there in person, watching them…watching him, was obviously on another level. You feel like you’ve been introduced to a new little part of Seungmin’s personality. You feel closer to him.

Now you’re back outside in the fresh night air. You haven’t heard from him yet, but you’re not surprised. He’s probably exhausted. You stick around, though. He didn’t mention anything about seeing each other after the concert ended, so you don’t assume anything or get your hopes up (even though they are, by default, always up when it comes to him).

A small group of girls—you can’t really tell how old, maybe around your age—find a place to sit near you. They’re understandably excited and very loud, so you listen in as they talk about their favorite parts, favorite songs, and biases. The loudest of the group is a Felix fan. You sneak a glance at them and one of them notices you.

She waves, “are you here alone?”

You look around and then point to yourself, “Me? Oh, yeah I am.”

The rest of them wave you over with such enthusiasm that you can’t possibly deny them your presence.

“Was it your first concert? It was mine, but not theirs. We’re flying to California for the first two next week.” The girl who looks the youngest, and has a Han Quokka plush strapped to her gestures to the whole group. “Are you going to any more?”

“This is the only one I got a ticket for, so probably not.

“Who’s you bias?” The one who spoke to you first asks.

You hesitate for a moment. Who is your bias?

“It’s Seungmin.”

The girl continues talking, but you’re distracted by the buzzing of your phone. It’s him.

you are still around, yeah?

“Of course! I’m outside”

Now he’s calling. “Sorry, I gotta get this!” You excuse yourself from the group and answer.

“Hi, it’s a little loud out here.”

“Okay, I just figured calling would be easier. Come back in the way you did earlier, I’m already here.”

“Okay, I’m near there. Give me 10 seconds.”

He starts counting down…

“Okay…nine…”

You laugh and speed up a little—

“Eight…”

—but there are more people here and dodging them is not easy.

“Seven…six…five…”

“Count slower!”

“Fooooouur…three…”

You see the door and push through a couple much harder than you intend, but your hand is pushing the door open just as Seungmin says—

“Two! You did it!”

He’s a good distance away, but you can see his smile. He takes a few steps toward you, but lets you finish closing the gap. He holds out his arms and pulls you into a hug, which catches you off guard. You’re surprised oh makes him giggle. There’s nobody around except for Jay, but it still feels very bold.

“You were amazing.” You squeeze him a little tighter around the waist, and he reciprocates.

“Thank you…I hope you had a good time.”

“I did,” you slowly release him but keep a bit of his shirt clenched in your fist. “What’s your plan for tonight?”

“Hotel tonight…and I think we are leaving in the morning. Unless they change things last minute, which sometimes happens.”

“Well, at least you don’t have to leave right away. It’d be nice if you stayed in Chicago a little longer, though.”

“Yes, it would be nice.” You see him glance at Jay and lower his voice. “I can let you know which hotel, though. And I’ll text you my room number.“

“Oh?” You feel your face getting hot, and Seungmin’s cheeks have definitely turned a shade of pink.

“Unless I have to share the room.”

“Well, you just let know which hotel. And we’ll figure something out if we need to.”

He nods shyly and takes your face in his hands. He doesn’t pull you in for a kiss, though, just gently rubs his thumb over your cheek. And it’s somehow even better.

“I have to go, but I’ll text you.” He disappears with Jay around the corner.

And then you panic a little, because you weren’t ready for a hotel invitation. You’re having flashbacks of the last date, and how heavy things got for just a few minutes. And how Seungmin reacted, because he hasn’t gone that far with anyone yet.

Maybe that isn’t what he was getting at. You’ve spent plenty of time with him alone in your apartment, why would being alone in his hotel be any different?

It’s just a feeling. Just in the way he lowered his voice and blushed. Things will play out how they’re supposed to, though. No pressure. You’d never put him in an uncomfortable situation.

It might be a good idea to prepare anyway.

Going home seems pointless, because the hotel is most likely here in the city. You don’t want to waste time traveling home and then back. You’re already short on time as it is.

But when you find a convenience store to pop into, you get a look at yourself in the mirror. It could be worse, you suppose. It was a hot day, and the concert was no different. Besides, Seungmin has already seen you like this. It can’t be that bad.

But you do buy a water to chug, gum, and when you pass by the condoms, you stare at them for far too long. Buying them means you expect something to happen, and you feel weird about expecting it for some reason. Not buying them and being unprepared seems worse, though.

You grab a pack. You grab two, actually. You did get a quick feel of him before. And you remember it well. Now you just have to deal with the awkwardness of checking out with two different sizes of condoms.

You stuff your purchases between the mess of other things in your bag and walk aimlessly for a few blocks. It’s still crowded down here, even though it’s getting late, and you can’t help but start worrying when almost an hour passes with no text from a Seungmin.

Maybe you should have gone home and waited.

But just as the thought crosses your mind, you get a message.

“Here’s the address, and my room number is 1344.”

Your heart starts to race when you read it. He has his own room, so things will at least be easy. And the address is only another two blocks away.

____

You text him when you get to his room instead of knocking. You’re afraid to make any unnecessary noise. He's shuffling around in the room before the latch clicks and the doorknob turns.

Somehow every time you see him, he’s even better looking.

The door is closed and locked behind you before either of you speak.

“Hi…you got here fast!”

“I was close by. Was I too fast?” You look him up and down. He’s in sweatpants and a black t-shirt, and his hair is a little damp.

“No, definitely not. As long as I don’t look like a wet dog.”

“No, you look very handsome,” you grab a handful of his shirt and pull him toward you. “It’s a good look.”

He leans forward and kisses you on the forehead. Another romantic gesture. It gives you butterflies. You like it, but you can't help but be baffled by his very bold and distinct romantic gestures. Three weeks ago he had a hard time with your hypothetical dating question. But that was three weeks ago.

“Do you want something more comfortable to wear? I can give you one of my shirts.

Okay, so maybe he does want you to spend the night, “Yes, I'd like that.”

He grabs one from his bag and shakes it out. Then he brings it to his face to smell it, “this is clean.”

“Thanks,” you hold it up and look at it.

“It not very big on me, so it should fit okay.”

You head into the bathroom and look at yourself again, try to get the butterflies in your stomach to calm down. Big breath in, slow breath out. It doesn’t seem like he’s trying to drive you crazy, but he’s doing a very good job.

You start taking off your necklaces, your bracelets, and then peel off your shirt that’s long since dried from the sweating you did all day. You check yourself for any offending odors, and even though it’s not bad, you take the time clean up the best you can.

It’s been a while since you had to do a sink bath before a potential lay. And every single one before this wasn’t even worth it. Seungmin is different, though.

Now you wonder if this is the way you want things to go. In a hotel, very little preparation. But you may not see him again for a while after tonight. And if this feels good for him, it's good for you.

There is still the possibility that he won’t be ready.

You slip into his shirt, and it's still pretty big. The sleeves reach your elbows and the bottom hem just covers your shorts. You could walk out without them and he might not even realize it—you take them off and fold them up neatly with your shirt and jewelry, look at yourself one more time, and then head back out to him.

“Oh, that looks good on you,” he turns from his seat at the edge of the bed, then pats his hands on the spot next to him. “Come here.”

As you climb onto the bed and crawl toward him, he slowly lies down on his back. “Are you tired?”

“No, not tired,” he props himself up on his elbow to get a better look at you. “Not yet...it takes a while to relax after a concert." He pulls at the hem of your shirt and his fingers slide across your thigh. He takes his hand away, so you grab it and put it back. Seungmin takes the hint and slides his palm to the side and gently squeezes.

When he looks up at you, you grin, but he just lets himself fall forward so he can hide his face in the blanket. You hear a big sigh, and maybe a soft laugh.

“What’s the matter?” You lie down next to him and wait until he turns his face to yours. “Minnie?”

“Nothing, I’m fine.”

“Do you want to get cozy and watch something?”

“Yes, that sounds nice.”

You pull the blankets down and fluff the pillows while he gathers himself again. “Which side do you prefer?”

“I’m not sure, I don’t usually have to choose.”

“Okay, I’ll take the left side.” You cover yourself up and relax against the pillows.

Seungmin follows, but he stays on top of the blankets for a moment and stares at you. You stare back and say nothing. Then he crawls underneath them, too.

“Don’t worry, I’ll keep my hands to myself.” You say.

He just pushes himself into the pillows and pulls the blanket up to his chin without a word, but he turns himself to face you.

You do the same.

“If that’s what you want.” He says.

You roll your eyes around as if you’re thinking and hmm under your breath. “Can I come closer?”

He nods.

You scoot yourself toward him until you can rest your forehead against his. “That’s better.”

“Can’t watch anything like this.”

“Oh, no I guess not,” you move back a little and look him over. “Should we—“

“No,” he wraps an arm around your waist and pulls you back. “This is good.”

You take the invitation and place your hand on his neck; he moves in for a kiss before you get the chance to, though. And he kisses hard enough to push you on your back.

For a moment you think this might be it, but you find yourself hesitating and softening your kiss. Then loosening the grip on his neck.

He pulls back and stares down at you.

“We don’t have to do anything you don’t wanna do,” you cup his face and hold him there. “There’s no rush.”

“I know.” He comes back down, kisses you once, and then falls back at your side. But his arm remains draped over your stomach.

Your heart sinks a little. It feels like you don’t know what you want. Well, you do know you want him, but you’re nervous. Maybe just as nervous as he is. “Don’t think I don’t want to, because I do.”

Seungmin smiles and sets his head against your shoulder. “I know you do.”

He knows you want him. You’re glad he knows—and you love the way he says it.

“Are you stopping because you’re worried I’m not ready?”

“No, only you know that. I’m just a little nervous, I guess.”

“You’re nervous?”

“I am.”

“You can’t be nervous if I’m nervous.”

He’s right. You take a deep breath and turn to face him again. Kiss him on the lips. Your free hand snakes around his waist, finds the hem of his shirt, and tucks underneath to run over his skin.

His muscles tighten for a second, then slowly relax as your hand moves upward against his side and across his shoulder blade. He sighs as you touch him.

You haven’t felt this much of his body until now.

You keep going, touching his stomach, his chest. It’s then that you feel his hand on you. It’s warm moving across your thigh, over your hip. His touch is soft, but he squeezes when he pulls you closer.

Seungmin slides his hand down to the back of your thigh and brings you as close as he can manage.

He’s on top off you again, hand still on you. His hips are gently pushing into yours. You can feel him through his sweatpants, and now your brain only wants one thing: to get them off of him.

“Seungmin,” you get him to look at you. “Seungmin?”

“Mhm?”

You pull his shirt over his head and toss it aside.

“Yeah?” He kisses your neck and lifts your shirt. “Are you okay?”

You nod and help him get it off.

“Oh,” he laughs and touches the spot directly below your sternum. “Tattoo.”

He looks over you slowly, a little shyly, before placing a kiss on your collarbone. You run a hand across the back of his neck. The other slides down his stomach until it reaches the band of his sweatpants.

Your heart beats wildly in your throat as your hand disappears. Fingers wrap around him and feel every inch. He whimpers softly into your neck. The hand buried in his hair moves down and kneads hard into his shoulder as your fingers stroke him.

Seungmin’s face is still in your neck, breathing hard. Eventually he takes a hand and maneuvers it to pull at his sweatpants. You let go to help slide them down enough to free him.

He moans, a little apprehensively, when you touch him again. You know you have to take it easy; he’s obviously very sensitive and you want this to last as long as possible for him.

“I like hearing you, don’t be shy.”

He tries to hold back an embarrassed laugh, but he does a bad job of it.

“Are you comfortable in this position? I could…do this with you on your back.”

He nods, but you don’t know which part he’s nodding to.

“Lie down.”

You let go of him until he’s on his back and relaxing. His face is still flushed and his breathing is a little shaky, but his eyes are almost closed. He seems relaxed enough. You kiss him and wrap your hand around him again.

His eyes open fully when you begin to stroke him again. His lips part and you slide your tongue against his.

The moans coming from him become a little louder. His hand lightly grips and slides down you arm.

“I didn’t really prepare for this. It could be better…if we had lube.”

“It feels good.” He whispers and smiles into your mouth. “Oh, I do have some.”

“Where?” You slow down a bit and let go of his lips. “I can grab it.”

“It’s…” he laughs sleepily, “it’s in my bag on the chair, in the smaller black bag.”

You climb over him and jump off the bed. The bag is is already open and a few things have been pulled out, but you can see a small black bag on the side. “I found it,” you unzip it and look around.

“It’s in the other little bag inside of that.” He laughs again. “Everyone is very nosy.”

You unzip the second bag, and there it is. It’s small, and still looks pretty full. You turn and look at him, “for when you’re lonely and horny on the road.”

He laughs again. “Yes, exactly.”

You warm a small amount in your hand and push the blanket down a little. You’ve touched him, but you haven’t really looked anywhere besides his lips and eyes yet. Now you watch your hand slowly move up and down , and the warmth and slickness makes everything so much better. You can feel how good it is for him. Your heartbeat drops into your stomach and you can feel yourself getting wetter every time he lets himself moan.

But as wet as you think you might be, his size is still more intimidating than you expected.

“You’re very good at this.”

You don’t think you’ve ever heard his voice so soft.

“Yeah?”

He bites his lips and nods. “It feels so good.”

The room is warm, and the AC hasn't kicked on again. There are a few beads of sweat forming at his temple—you kiss him there and work your way down to his chest, then across his stomach.

The muscles tighten as you move across his hot skin, further and further down. When you slide your tongue across his head, he moans out the breath he’d been holding since you got to his chest. The sound he makes is desperate. He does it again when your lips close around him and your hand grips a little more tightly.

He wasn’t prepared for your mouth. He breathes out your name and it sends a wave of pleasure through you. His hand touches softly across your back and neck.

He says your name again.

“You okay, Minnie?” You kiss his stomach again and look up at him.

He nods and sits up, “can I touch you?”

You let go of him and straddle his stomach. He reaches for you and runs his fingers over the thin fabric. You put your hand over his and push your underwear to the side so he can feel you. There’s another, almost inaudible moan when he does.

Two fingers slip deep inside as you lean in to kiss him, and with your help, he gets the hang of moving inside of you.

You sigh sweetly into his mouth. You’re already much more sensitive than you normally would be. Every little movement he makes is causing just enough friction where you need it. The heel of his palm found your clit and you’re not sure he even realizes.

“I’m gonna come if you keep that up, wait a sec,” you stop his hand and take a deep breath.

“You are?” His voice cracks and he sits up more. His other hand has been digging into your hip, and he finally loosens his grip. There might be a bruise there later.

You grab his face and kiss him hard, then finally maneuver yourself out of your underwear while he’s there to keep you balanced. You reach behind and find his cock, stroke him a few times, and move back.

“Are you good if I…have a seat?” You laugh and wrap your other arm around his shoulder.

“Yes, very good,” he holds onto your waist to help steady you both.

When his head slides across you, he smiles and throws his head back. You do it again before carefully pushing him a little bit inside of you. It doesn’t take much to get another sound out of him.

“There’s a lot more to go,”

He looks drunk, but he smirks, “sorry.”

“For what?”

“For having a lot more to go,” he laughs.

“I’m not complaining.”

You push him deeper, just a little, because you’re not sure what your limit will be in this position.

And deeper. You watch him carefully. His eyes are closed and his mouth is open. You hold him tightly around the neck with both arms before slowly lifting yourself.

It takes a few more times before you find a rhythm , but when you do, you’re sure the sound Seungmin makes reaches the surrounding hotel rooms.

You try to quiet him with your mouth, but it only stifles him a little. You love the noise, but if the others are close enough to hear him, it might makes things awkward.

His hands hold your hips and slowly guide you up and down on his cock. You breath his name into his mouth, and he bites down on your lip.

His voice is a whisper. “Is it okay?”

“Yes,” you whine and push yourself as far down as you can. It stings, just a little, and only for a moment. “You feel so good.”

He leans back to watch himself slide inside of you, and the lusty, satisfied look on his face is making the ride even smoother. “Do I?” He takes your face in his hand and runs his thumb along your lips and cheek.

The room disappears and all that exists is the feeling of him; his breath on your neck, his voice in your ears. His hands grip you tighter, lifting you, and holding you steady when he fills you up again.

He’s not ready for it when you pick up your pace. His fingers dig hard into your hips—you hear him swear under his breath as he attempts to keep himself under control.

“Talk to me, I wanna hear your voice. Do you like it, Minnie?”

Seungmin kisses your neck, his lips graze over your ear, “yes,” he manages through the soft sounds he can’t hold back, “yes, fuck. You feel amazing.”

You pull him away and look at him, arms still wrapped firmly around his neck. One hand slides up and into his hair. “I like you like this.”

“Like what?”

“Under me, lost in it. I thought you were sexy before…but—“

“You think I’m sexy?” His smile is cute and tipsy, voice is airy. If it weren’t for you holding him up, he’d be flat on his back.

All of the sudden, you’re snapped back to reality. Seungmin is there, eyes wide, but the room is back. You’re no longer floating. You lost control and went a little too hard, and it hurt. You make a pained sound and all of your weight is on his shoulders.

“Did I hurt you?” He holds you up and pulls out, and you’re now relieved to be giving your burning thighs a break.

“No, no you didn’t,” You have to kiss him to get rid of the worried look on his face. “That was my fault.”

“We should change positions.”

You lay back on the pillows and grab his waist when he crawls over you. Your legs fall open and rest on either side of him.

“This is a bad angle for you to look at,” he smiles and hides his face in your neck.

You lift his face back up, “is that a joke? You’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever had between my legs.”

He whispers a no and hides his face again, but at the same time, his fingertips slide down your thigh as if he’s teasing you.

”Sexiest…” you moan into his ear and wrap your legs around him to bring him closer.

You don’t need to give him any more direction. He explores you briefly with his fingers before guiding himself in the same way you did; slow and gentle.

“I’ll be careful…” he slides in easily in this position, stopping short to make sure he isn’t going too far.

You take his hips and carefully pull him in the rest of the way.

A rough groan jumps out of him when you meet. He stays there and looks at you until you brush the hair from his eyes and speak. “What is it?”

“Nothing,” he smiles, looks down your body, then back up to your face. “Just like looking at you.”

“I’m the one with the view,” you kiss him and shift your hips, getting another sound out of him.

Now he’s finding a rhythm, but he’s much more reserved than you were. He seems to know his own limits, and maybe he’s trying not to overdo it and finish too fast.

“Is this okay?” He nuzzles into your ear and whispers before kissing you just below it.

“Yes,” your hands run up his sides and back, his neck, into his hair, “it’s perfect.”

He thrusts into you, very delicately, a few more times before slowing down. Then he stops completely, still inside of you. He’s breathing hard, eyes closed in concentration.

“Seungmin?”

“I just…need a few seconds.”

“Take your time,” you take his hand in yours and help his thumb find your clit.

He moves it in slow circles and watches you for any direction. But he does very well. He has a light touch, and a good pace. His hands are soft and warm. This, combined with him inside of you, looking down at you with eyes drunk with pleasure trying so hard not to come yet, is making everything happen very fast. But you don’t mind.

When he pulls out halfway and pushes back inside, you whimper and the pleased look on his face pushes you over the edge. He smiles and starts fucking you again, and he doesn't let up—you feel it coming. You moan much louder than you intend. He loves hearing it.

Your back arches up and your legs squeeze around him. It lasts a long time, and he doesn’t stop—just carefully touches you in the right spot until your body finally relaxes

“Wow…did you—”

You nod and try to catch your breath.

He doesn’t get through his question because it’s his turn. He comes hard and fast. The condom was completely forgotten up until this point, and he certainly doesn’t attempt to pull out. You don’t even allow yourself to dwell on it—you just enjoy the moment.

Seungmin’s mouth hangs open, and his eyes water. His moan is different this time; it’s more feral. His whole body tightens and moves in slow motion as his orgasm passes through him. He pumps into you until he can't take it anymore..

Then he’s catching his breath and regaining his composure. He comes down to kiss you, tucks an arm under your neck to bring you closer. He slowly pulls out and puts his weight on his knees.

“Come here…”

He listens and slowly lowers himself next to you. His hair is a little damp from sweat, and his face is pink. It’s a good look for him. You pull the sheet up and over both of you, then wipe at his brow with your thumb.

“That was nice,” he’s still catching his breath. His eyes close and you can see his body soften and relax on the pillows. “That was very nice.”

“Yeah, it was.”

“It was better than nice,” his eyes flutter open and he looks at you. Then he reaches out and pulls until there’s no space left between you. “It was much better than I thought it could be.”

“Wow,” you say into his neck. “That’s quite a compliment.”

“But I’m sorry, it’s probably not great that we didn’t use protection.”

“No, but I’ll take care of it in the morning.”

Someone’s phone buzzes.

“I think that was me,” Seungmin says and reaches behind him. His phone got lost somewhere underneath the blankets. As soon as he glances at the screen, he tosses it behind him again. “Are you going to stay the night?” He asks, arms tight around you again.

“I should get home before my mom starts to worry.”

He nods and tries to hide a pout.

“But you’re leaving in the morning, right?

“I think so, I’m not sure what time.”

“Would it be alright if I spent the night? So we can say goodbye.”

“Yes, that's a much better plan.”

“Can I use the shower?” You wiggle free of his grasp and look at him, “heat, concert, sex…that’s a lot to sleep in.”

Seungmin laughs and nods, “yes, go take a long hot shower.”

____

When you come back to the room, Seungmin is sitting at the desk writing. You can hear soft music playing from his phone. There are fresh clothes laid out on your side of the bed: the shirt you had on very briefly, and a pair of very comfy looking sweatpants.

“Are these for me?” You ask. He’s already cleaned up and redressed.

He closes his book he’s writing in and spins around in the chair, “yes, I’m sure they won’t fit very well, but they’re comfortable.”

“Thank you.” You drop your towel and pick up the shirt.

Seungmin stares at you as you pull it over your head, “what?” You laugh and grab the sweatpants. They are soft and they look expensive.

“Uhm, sorry…I didn’t see you without your bra before.”

You think he might be blushing.

“Oh!” You grab your chest, “I guess you didn’t. Come here.”

“Hm?” He smirks and walks toward you as you lift the shirt back over your head. “Oh…”

You take his hands and he immediately touches you, running his palms, and then his fingertips, over your nipples. They stiffen from his touch. He sits at the edge of the bed and pulls you closer, keeping one hand on your chest. The other runs down your side and over your ass. He squeezes and kisses the spot where your tattoo is.

This could turn into something very quickly, but right now you want nothing more than to get under the covers with him and sleep. You know he needs it.

“I like this,” he pulls at the hem of your shirt when you slip it back on. “You look cute in my clothes.”

____

It’s nice waking up next to him.

The room is still dark because the curtains are pulled shut, but not completely—little bits of sunlight make it in through the sides. You can see his sleeping face, cheek squashed against the pillow, lips slightly parted. He’s curled up tight in his spot with the blanket only covering his lower half, but one bare knee is far up enough to poke out.

His arm is reaching toward you, palm up and fingers curled. You slide your hand over the sheets and gently touch him. His fingers twitch and then close around yours.

He sighs deeply, then opens his eyes. First he looks at his hand holding onto yours, then his eyes move along your arm and up to where you’re laying on your pillow.

“Good morning,” he squeezes your hand and moves himself closer to you. “Did you sleep well?”

You nod and pull his hand up to your lips. “Did you?”

“Mhm, very well.”

“Did I tell you how amazing you were last night?” You ask and fluff his hair, “I mean…” you hide behind a hand, “I’m still asleep.”

“Well, I don’t know about…amazing.”

“The concert I mean!” you hide your face in the pillow, and Seungmin giggles as he tries to get you to look at him.

“I was okay I think.”

“The concert was…and you. I was focused on you the whole time.” You clarify as much as possible through your grin.

“You focused on Seungmin the whole time?”

“Yeah, the best part.

“And last night…last last night.” He smiles wide.

“Also focused on Seungmin.”

He pushes himself closer until his face disappears into your neck. “Thank you.”

A knock echoes through the room. Three heavy knocks. The voice that comes through is soft. “Seungmin, are you up?”

“Oh, it’s Lee Know. Stay here.”

You stay put and pull the covers up over your shoulders, but you turn to face the door. Seungmin opens the locks and pulls it open a few inches.

“What’s wrong? It’s still early.”

“I know, but I thought you might want to get breakfast,” Lee Know puts a palm on his side of the door and pushes, “can I not come in?”

“Uh, you can but…” Seungmin hesitates. “I’m not alone.” He gives in when Lee Know takes several steps into the room. He won’t be able to hide you for much longer.

“Oh,” he looks to the spot on the bed where you’re under a pile of covers. “Is it the girl, the one who was at the soundcheck?”

“Did IN tell you about her?.”

“No, Chan did. I should go. I’m sorry.”

“You don’t have to go,” you squeak out. You can just make him out from your spot, and when you pull the covers down from your nose, his whole body comes into view. Then you remember that one of them doesn't speak English very well, and you think it may have been him. You repeat yourself in Korean.

His eyes widen a bit. “Should we all get into bed, then?” He can be sarcastic and dry; you remember Seungmin mentioned that as well.

You sit up and look at him with a smirk on your face. “He’s the boss.” You nod toward Seungmin.

“You’re the boss,” Lee Know looks at Seungmin and winks. “Text me if you want to come.”

Now he turns to you, “nice to meet you,” he smirks and lets himself out.

Seungmin let’s out a long sigh when he’s gone.

“Come back to bed,” you move the blankets from his spot and fluff up his pillow. “Please.”

He listens and crawls back to your side. When he puts an arm around your waist and pulls you close, he says, “I was nervous about you meeting him.”

“Lee Know? Why were you nervous?”

“Am…am nervous, I guess.”

“You don’t think he’d like me?”

“The opposite, actually.” He hides his face in your chest and whines.

You oooh into his ear and it makes him giggle. “Does that tickle?” You move his hair and place a kiss there.

“I think you two are very similar.” Seungmin says. “You remind me of him sometimes, especially when we text.”

“Is that a bad thing?”

“No,” he shakes his head, still shoved into your chest. “But, I just think you’d like him.”

You scoot yourself down until you’re face to face with him, but he still doesn’t lift his gaze. “Hey, look at me.”

He doesn't.

"Minnie?"

This time he listens, but he also gives you his best puppy eyes.

“You think I’ll get to know him and like him more than I like you?”

Seungmin nods.

“And that he’ll steal me away from you?”

He nods again, then stops and shakes his head, "You're not really mine to be stolen away..." he scrunches his face up in thought, wondering if his English made any sense.

“Well, I’m a little flattered you’d think someone else would like me that much. I’m much more flattered you don’t wanna have me stolen away.”

He rubs his eyes and sits himself up on the bed. “I’m sorry, I know we already talked about this.”

“We can talk about it again if you want to.”

He shakes his head and gets back under the covers. His hands find you and start to paw—at your side, your hip. He slides one down your outer thigh, and slowly back up. Then he starts to talk anyway. “He also knows Choonhee very well.”

“Okay, I think I'm understanding. I could have possibly been set up with Lee Know instead of Seungmin?”

You can hear his dramatic whine from underneath the covers. “It is very possible.”

“But I was set up with you for a reason. And you’re the first person I went on a date with since I left home, so I got very lucky.”

“Lucky?”

“Yeah, lucky. Good dates are hard to find.”

Seungmin pokes his head out from the covers and smiles at you. “I’m glad I was a good date.”

"You were a perfect date."

"You should call me Minnie more." He says it's softly, but his hands are in a dangerous spot. "All the time. I like it.

"You were a perfect date, Minnie."

[its-time-to-write]

Can you write a Jamie Tartt request where he and the reader are in the "between lovers and friends stage" and they finally get together when he has her sleepover at his place after finding out her ex was loitering by her apartment?

I’m alive (mostly!) and I’m starting to go through the asks in my inbox again! Sorry to all y’all who have been waiting. I love you!😇😍

p.s. I’ve been obsessed with the song “Margaret” by LDR, which is where the title comes from

(oh also I barely responded to this prompt so that I could write this dumb fic that’s been on my brain forever. so. apologies for that too)

maybe tomorrow you’ll know

It goes like this: boy meets girl, they go to the same primary school, girl kicks around football with boy and sneaks into his room to hug him when his dad’s a prick, boy moves away to become a Premier League footballer and girl cries her heart out because they’re best friends.

Fucking typical.

And yet, he still picks up every phone call. Still answers every text you send. He’ll never say the word “love,” especially not when he’s with Keeley Jones and their faces are all over tabloids and instagram. But you’ll feel it in the way he’s a prick to everyone but you. It’s in the way his voice goes soft when you call him at 2am crying about being dumped by your first boyfriend.

He doesn’t visit, doesn’t phone his mum, but he’ll send you a quick voice message when he can. Usually not saying much, just a snip about training. First it’s all about Pep and the lads at Man City, then it’s about some gaffer named Cartrick and the fact that he’s teammates with Roy fucking Kent.

Jamie never tells you that Roy absolutely fucking hates him, but you know anyway.

Jamie also doesn’t call you when Keeley breaks up with him. In fact, you don’t even find out about it until pictures of Roy and Keeley surface online. You call him as soon as you can, and in typical Jamie fashion, he picks up on the second ring. 

You don’t ask him about Keeley, just let him talk about football and the new manager from America, and the fact that maybe Richmond isn’t so bad and maybe he can let his armor down just a little bit.

He’s sent back to Manchester the next day.

The bonds of childhood friendship run strong, because he’s on your doorstep in no time at all, and though it’s been years since you’ve seen him in person, there’s a part of you that feels like he never left. 

It never goes beyond friendship with you two. You don’t allow yourself to consider him in any other light because this friendship is special and important and neither of you will let anything ruin it.

It’s so strange sometimes to see him on tv or in an interview, eyes sharp and mouth full of barbs. Always on the offensive, always cutting others down before they have a chance to do the same to him. You have a hard time believing it’s the same boy who’s on your couch staring at the ceiling as he fiddles with the hem of his sweatshirt.

He’s never spoken that way to you, and you have a hard time believing he ever will.

So you feed him and make him smile and go to as many matches as you can (he leaves tickets on your kitchen table so you won’t protest) and give him a house key so he can come and go as he pleases.

But then he’s gone again, it’s the off-season and he’s on some tv show and you’re watching him flirt and seduce and pull at people’s heartstrings like they’re marionettes, and you realize (perhaps for the first time) how deep the damage has gone.

He gets absolutely shredded online, called all sorts of names by fans of the show and football alike, and you wonder if you’re the only one who can see what’s happening. That it’s all a show and that person, that Jamie Tartt on the screen is not the Jamie Tartt who used to throw pebbles at your window to come see if you wanted to ride bikes together.

It’s different than when he went to the Premier League. He doesn’t answer your texts.

It’s fine though, because your life doesn’t revolve around him. You have other, real friends and a boyfriend and a nice little flat and a good job. So he can go do what he wants and when he needs someone to pick up the pieces, you’ll go because you understand that sometimes this friendship is a one-way street. 

You miss him, though.

You don’t watch his season of Lust Conquers All until your boyfriend calls you and says, “Hey, it’s been fun, but I’m just not feeling it anymore, thanks for understanding,” and then you binge every episode right up to the current one. 

So now you don’t have a boyfriend. You’re glad it hadn’t gone too far, but his words still stung. But you drown your feelings in ice cream and shitty tv and it’s alright because another episode airs in an hour, so you can see more of Jamie and hope he’s doing okay.

He’s not. He gets voted off and you think that’s stupid but also maybe a little bit good.

—

Jamie just thinks it’s stupid. He’s kicked off his only lifeline, and then Man City flat-out refuses to take him back and he has to find out on live television for fuck’s sake. And then he has the brilliant idea to ask Ted Lasso to come back, because of course Ted will take him, what with his yeehaw can-do bullshit. Except Ted tells him no, and now he has nothing.

He’s cut out every friend, every family member and is resigned to life as a has-been before he’s even twenty-five years old.

Now, he’s at home with the blinds pulled. He’s not even sure what time it is anymore because it’s all meaningless, innit? So when there’s a knock at the door, he has to blink a couple times from his place on the couch before turning off FIFA and going to see who it could possibly be.

He hopes it’s you, even though he knows there’s no way. Not after he ghosted you for months. He ignores the uncomfortable flip-flop in his stomach at the thought of seeing you, and the way his heart beats a little faster when he thinks of holding you. 

He won’t cross that line. Your friendship (if it still exists) is too important. 

So he opens the door, ready to see who the fuck is bothering him. 

It’s Ted.

Ted asks, “Can I come in?” but he’s obviously not going to accept no as an answer, so Jamie steps back to let him inside.

Ted’s just standing awkwardly in Jamie’s kitchen, not even pretending that he isn’t shocked by Jamie’s decor. 

Jamie isn’t going to defend his choices to Ted of all people. Nor is he going to do anything to lessen his awkwardness. Finally, Ted clears his throat and says, “Well Jamie, it seems we need to revisit our last conversation.”

Jamie stares at him, refusing to speak until he’s sure what Ted is saying, so Ted continues. 

“I think I was a little bit too hasty when I said you couldn’t come back to Richmond. I’ve been giving it some thought, and we’d love to have you back.”

Jamie looks at Ted, all rumpled in his sweatshirt and shorts, hair as undone as it’s ever been, and is supremely unsure of what he’s supposed to say. 

Yeah, I’ll come back to Richmond. 

Fuck off, you’re too late.

He’s saved from saying something stupid by the sound of the front door rattling as someone punches in the code. 

“You expectin’ someone?” Ted asks. 

Jamie shakes his head, equally puzzled. “No one has the code, except-”

The door is shoved open and you burst through in a flurry of motion. You call, “Jamie?” but you can already see him in the kitchen so you make a beeline to his location and launch yourself into his arms. 

He’s solid as always, smelling like day-old Lynx. His arms are tight wrapped around you, body warm as you press your cheek against his. 

He sets you down after a moment, and brushes away a stray strand of hair from your face. 

“What’re you doing here?” he asks softly, still not quite letting you go. Ted notes that this is a new tone for Jamie. Or at least, the Jamie he’s interacted with. It’s not a performance, not something designed to make people love or hate him, it’s what Ted suspects is the most authentic version of Jamie. Whoever you are, you must be important. 

“Wanted to make sure you were ok. I saw your interview.”

Jamie makes a face. “Fuck’s sake, has everyone seen that shit?”

You shrug. “Hard to miss it. Your mum sent it to me. She’s kind of why I’m here, actually.”

“You know Jamie’s mom?” Ted asks, surprised. It’s only then that you notice he’s in the room. Your face heats up because you wouldn’t have been that grabby with Jamie had you known he weren’t alone.

“Hi, I’m Ted,” he says reaching out to shake your hand, “Seems to me like you know this one from a while back.”

“Uh, yeah,” you reply. “Which is why I figured something was wrong when he ghosted me for fucking ever.”

Jamie winces and Ted takes his cue. 

“I’ll leave you two to catch up,” he says. He points a finger at Jamie. “You let me know what you decide, son.”

“It’s a yes, Coach,” Jamie calls as Ted heads out the door. You crane your neck in time to see Ted pump his fist in the air before the door shuts behind him. 

“So,” you say, arms crossed, “you have a big fucking excuse for not answering my calls. But you better never fucking do it again, or I’m showing back up here with Georgie and she’ll kick your ass.” 

Jamie grimaces. Sure, Georgie was never violent with him, but there’s something particularly terrifying about the way she says Jamie Tartt you have got some explaining to do, while her eyes do that thing where they flash and stare straight into his soul. 

“Right, yeah, I’m really sorry,” he says and he’s lucky that his tone backs up his words because if he had one ounce of prick in his voice, you’d make him really sorry. I mean come on, who ignores their family?

The thought passes through your mind just long enough for it to freak you out before Jamie’s tentatively reaching out to hug you again. 

You let him rest his head on your shoulder as you scratch his the back of his head. 

—

You’ve been on Jamie’s couch for the better part of two hours, talking and letting him pretend like he’s not on the verge of tears because at least he’s being open and honest for once, when he shoots up and says, “Jesus Christ, fucking Kyle.”

He turns to you, eyes wide as he asks, “Isn’t he gonna wonder where you are? Shit, and you’re with me. He’s not gonna like that shit at all.”

You shrug infinitesimally while you examine a spot on the wall. 

“We’re not together anymore,” you answer as casually as possible. 

Jamie sighs and settles back onto the couch. “Shit. Glad you finally dumped that prick.”

You glare at him. “I didn’t. He dumped me. And then I found him lurking in my fucking bushes yesterday like a total creeper.”

Jamie’s up again off the couch, this time heading for his car keys as he yells, “For fuck’s sake, love, you should’ve called me.”

“I did!” you shout back. “I did, and you didn’t pick up, did you? Anyway, it’s probably not going to be an issue anymore.”

Jamie returns to the living room, face ashen. “Shit. Fuck. Fucking shit. I’m so sorry.”

You shrug and say, “It’s not a big deal. He decided that he liked certain body parts he owned more than he liked intimidating me. 

Jamie grips his keys so hard that his knuckles turn white as he says, “Right, you’re sleeping over tonight because no one fucking treats my girl that way.”

Then he freezes. 

You’re not frozen, because a single shiver has worked its way up your spine. 

My girl.

It came out so naturally. 

And it implied ownership? But of the mutual sort? And in a way that two best friends simply did notbelong together. 

The entire house is so silent, you swear you can hear Jamie blink. Well, that is, if either of you actually moved a muscle as opposed to staring at each other across the room. 

“What-” you start, but your throat is all weird and tight, so you clear it and try again. “What did you say?”

It still comes out much lower than you anticipated and Jamie has a split second to assess your body language and make a choice. 

You’re fully angled toward him, eyes wide. You’re not giving him a look that says, shut the fuck up right now, Jamie Tartt, so he takes it as permission. 

Permission to take one step closer, then another, then another until he’s standing right next to you. He slowly sinks down on the couch next to you as his says in a low, gravely voice, “I said, ‘no one fucking treats my girl that way.’”

Ah. So this is where over a decade of friendship has gotten you. On Jamie Tartt’s couch as your lips crash against his, both wondering why you hadn’t made a move sooner. 

But it doesn’t matter, you’re here now and you’re sure you won’t waste a single second. 

[cryptidghostgirl]

Oooo part 2 of Aka Till Death Do Us Part (Alastor x Mad Scientist!Reader) was interesting

Loved it a lot 😭

Just imagining how reader would meet Lucifer (yes I'mma add some short king love) for the first time, whether this the ep where everyone meets him for the first time or he's just visiting is undecided.

Anyways she's a smart gal, she creates viruses, diseases, etc.. in order to destroy the human race (now demon and angel race), so she tries to befriend Lucifer

He's powerful, he could be her ticket out of the deal she was tricked into. Plus Alastor hates him so even better.

Whether the wife collector is befriending her from his hatred for Alastor (aka trying to steal his ex wife) or because he actually likes her or not is also undecided

But they become buddies, keeping her little secret while playing Alastor as this horrid creature that coerced her into a deal

She might not understand how deals function, but just like Alastor she'll find a way out of it. She won't let him interrupt her work for years again.

Another bonus of befriending Lucifer is she can try and coerce him into giving her some samples (blood, hair, skin, etc..) It'll help with the virus she's creating, along with seeing if there's any cell differences between fallen angels and normal ones.

A/N I literally love this idea. It is so on brand for her if she was tuned in with the world around her enough to realize her hanging with Lucifer even made Alastor mad. Also, not you calling Lucifer 'the wife collector,' that made me cackle.

Till Death Do Us Part pt. 3 (Alastor x Mad Scientist!Reader)

Pairing: Alastor x Reader x maybe also Lucifer a little bit if you squint

Previous Parts:

Till Death Do Us Part (Alastor x Mad Scientist!Reader)

Till Death Do Us Part pt. 2

Warnings: I am not a woman nor am I in stem (but an enby in history) so pls be kind about the fact that I don't understand science. Angst, abusive/unhealthy relationship, possessive Alastor. It's not love but its certainly something.

Word Count: 2,176

Master Lists:

Master Lists 

Hazbin Hotel Master List 

Alastor Master List 

Click here and leave a comment if you want to be added to any taglists or send me an ask about it.

Idle hands are the devil's playthings, wasn't that how the expression went?

It had been a month since that fateful day Y/n had struck a deal with Alastor, tying her to his side once again. She railed against it, fought valiantly, but there was no escaping the constraints of the contract. Never allowed a moment to herself, Y/n's life became a series of involvement in group activities she hated and chastisements from Alastor. She sat at his feet, the collar hanging heavy around her neck as a sort of twisted crown in his eyes. The Radio Demon and his wife, his queen, his prisoner.

She was never allowed out of his sight, Alastor even forcing her to stay in the same room as him, to sleep in the same bed. It was nothing Y/n had any sort of frame of reference for. He had never been like this in life, she had never experienced this sort of metaphorical suffocation. Y/n was adrift, the world a confusing blur around her. Every time she tried to make sense of it, thought she had figured out some small aspect, he changed it all again and left her in a lurch that sent her mind spiraling into unformed chaos.

Even when she managed somehow to stole a spare moment, was able to sneak away to her lab of a room, Alastor found her and dragged her out again. Y/n's continual protests and pleas to be allowed to continue her work, for him to hold up his end of the bargain and deliver her an angel, fell on deaf ears or were merely met with a solitary, fragile 'soon.' For all this time, Y/n had thought Hell to be misrepresented. She had found a true Heaven in Pentagram City, a safe haven, a salve. Now, she knew the true meaning of suffering.

It was different than she had expected. To suffer had always been something physical in her eyes. It had been her victims writhing in pain, it had been the sharp oppression of a world filled with human life. Never had she thought being trapped in her own mind like this could be a curse, rather than a blessed moment of reprieve.

Idle hands are the devil's playthings, wasn't that how the expression went? Y/n's hands were most certainly idle, all she needed was the devil to play with them.

It was just her luck when Lucifer showed up at the hotel, intent on visiting his daughter. Y/n was never the most observant but, since being tricked into selling her soul to Alastor, had become quite wary and watchful of him. It did not escape her notice the way his stance tightened and his eye twitched the minute the King of Hell threw himself through the hotel's double doors and into Charlie's arms.

Y/n watched the interaction carefully from where she sat lazily on the table beside Angel Dust and Sir Pentious. There were exactly three thoughts in her mind. The first was that it was useful to know Alastor hated the man. The second was that Lucifer was standing right before her eyes. He was powerful, maybe powerful enough to get her out of the sticky situation she currently found herself to be in. Not only that, but he was once an angel. This was the most important of the three thoughts, completely eclipsing the other two as soon as they reared their heads. Not quite the real deal but, potentially useful none the less. Getting close to him could mean getting one step closer to her goals. Silently, she slipped down from the table and began to approach the grouping of demons.

With a carful step, she sidled up behind them. Softly, she raised a hand to the back of Lucifer's head, to where his hair peaked out from beneath the edges of his hat. The excitement that rose in her chest was quickly stifled as Lucifer spun around.

"Charlie!" he exclaimed, "Why don't you introduce me to some of your other fr- oh!"

Y/n froze, her hand still raised. She opened her mouth to speak but the words caught in her throat once she caught the glare Alastor was sending her way. Letting out a nervous chuckle, Y/n's hands fell to her sides, clasping behind her back.

"Uh..." Lucifer turned to his daughter, his eyebrows raised.

"Oh, don't mind Y/n," Charlie awkwardly tittered, stepping forward, "she is always a bit... odd but, she is actually our newest guest!"

"Uh-huh." Lucifer nodded, his eyes moving back to Y/n and examining her features carefully, "Well, it is nice to be meeting you."

Lucifer stuck out his hand for Y/n to shake but the demon just eyed it warily. The furtive glance she shot Alastor behind his back, and the subtle nod he gave in return, did not escape Lucifer's notice. With another distasteful glance towards his hand, Y/n raised part of her hair up and took it, shaking it firmly.

Lucifer's confusion only seemed to grow as he looked down towards the point of connection.

"Um... okay, then." he hummed in thought as she released his hand.

It was when Alastor went out to solve the problem Mimzy had caused that Lucifer took his chance. All the while, as Mimzy had blathered on to Y/n about the 'good old days' and the shared aspects of their pasts, as soon as the tour of the hotel had ended, she had watched him. Observance was not, however, in her nature. It completely had escaped her notice that, all the while, Lucifer had been watching her as well.

The demon herself was nothing of import. She was strange and unrefined and, to be honest, deeply disconcerting to him in a number of ways. It was the thing lurking beneath it all that caught his attention. There was something going on between that girl and the Radio Demon and Lucifer didn't trust either of them. He may have thought Charlie's dreams to be in vain, known from his own experience how fruitless her project would turn out to be, but that didn't stop him from doing what it took to keep his little girl safe.

Lucifer sidled up beside the girl where she stood, watching the carnage Alastor wreaked with a vague sense of disinterest.

"So, you have a deal with the Radio Demon."

It was a statement, not a question. It was an accusation. Y/n shot into the air in surprise, not having noticed his presence beside her. With wide, analytical eyes, she turned to face him.

"With Alastor?"

"Yep."

"How could you tell?" she asked, leaning forward in curiosity.

"What are you two planning."

Another subtle command that went right over Y/n's head. She sighed, crossing her arms.

"I'm planning world destruction. He wants me to be his wife again and tricked me into this whole..." she waved her hands wildly through the air, "situation."

Lucifer didn't know whether to laugh or to take her out right there. Instead, he shook his head, opting to state in mild shock:

"Married? Again?"

"Yeah. I forced him to when we were alive so people would leave me alone and I'd have some human test subjects for my work. Let me tell you: not my favorite experiment I have ever conducted."

"I..." Lucifer was flabbergasted, struck into silence.

"So he tricked me into a deal. I was hiding from him for decades down here. One little slip up was all it took." she playfully used her hair to hit the side of her head, "Stupid Y/n."

"Where does the again part fit in?"

Y/n raised her eyebrows.

"Really? Why is that the part I have to explain to everyone. I mean, logically, it just doesn't make sense. That should be the question on the bottom of someones list. It shouldn't even be a question."

"Did you get a divorce?"

"In 1930? No. Even I knew that wasn't really an option. I married him to stop people talking, not start it. Besides, he wasn't this much of a bother when we were alive."

"So..." Lucifer prompted after a moment.

"Till death do us part?"

"Ah."

He really did laugh now. Just a light chuckle. Y/n smiled in appreciation.

"There you go. Now, how did you know? About the deal, I mean. Also, why do you guys hate each other so much? I thought you had never met before? And oh! Ohohoh! Also, can I have some of your hair."

Lucifer scoffed, his arms falling loosely from where he had crossed them over his chest to his sides. Charlie had been right, Y/n certainly was odd.

"My hair?"

Y/n nodded her head eagerly. When he gave no response, a concentrated and slightly confused expression flitted across her face. As if struck by a sudden inspiration, she regained her composure once again.

"Oh, yeah. I'm supposed to say 'please' when I ask for stuff. Al always said it was proper manners but I think its just a waste of time to be perfectly honest. It's still the same request, the same outcome. Doesn't really change anything. Why would one word make someone give a totally different answer? I mean, it's just foolish really. Anyway," she cleared her throat, "can I please have some of your hair?"

"I..." Lucifer raised a hand to his forehead, rubbing his temples, "why?"

"Because you're a fallen angel?" Y/n replied as if it was the most obvious thing in the world, "And I want to see what that means?"

Before Lucifer could reply, Alastor stepped back into the lobby, straightening his jacket.

"What a show!" Angel exclaimed, applauding dramatically.

Alastor tipped his head to the side in recognition, his eyes surveying the room. When they fell on Lucifer and Y/n in the corner, his gaze hardened. Y/n payed the commotion no mind. Lucifer, on the other hand, grinned.

"I have a proposal." he hummed, turning back to Y/n.

She narrowed her eyes in sudden doubt.

"You don't like Alastor very much, do you?"

"No...? Of course I don't!" Y/n replied in exasperation, "All he does is keep me from doing my work and drag me around by that stupid chain like a dog. It hurts my neck and..." her voice grew softer and she looked away, fixing her eyes on her interlaced fingers, "and I feel like he's trying to force me into the shape of something I'm not. It's... it's like wearing shoes that are four sizes two small on a twenty mile hike."

Lucifer laughed.

"Well, that certainly is... descriptive. How about we make a deal?"

Her head shot up, her narrowed eyes meeting his once again.

"You're not going to just take my soul like he did, are you?"

"No, of course not my dear. Only lesser demons like him need to do that in order to feel strong, to maintain some sort of power, to get what they want." Lucfier enunciated the last four words sharply, the syllables like needles, "I'm simply offering an exchange."

"That's what he said too."

Lucifer raised his hands to show he meant no harm.

"Look, we don't even have to shake on it. I will give you some of... some of my hair or... whatever... and you will help me get on his nerves, take him down a notch. Who the Hell knows, that might even help you too."

Y/n was silent in thought for a moment. She did want the hair and messing with Alastor seemed all too appealing. Still, there was something eating away at her.

"Would you..." she lifted herself up to Lucifer's eye level with her hair.

Y/n wasn't that much shorter than the king of Hell, just a couple inches. Those couple inches certainly made a difference. Lucifer could have sworn there was a literally electrical spark in the darkness of her eyes.

"You're powerful, yes? King of Hell and all?"

Lucifer nodded.

"Would you be able to help me figure out a way out of this mess?"

It was Lucifer's turn to think now as he mulled the idea over in his mind. Sure, theoretically he probably could but, he had never tried to break another demon's deal and even past that, he didn't know if he wanted to. Y/n was disarming, strange, had mentioned wanting to destroy the world. Lucifer didn't know her well enough to gage if there was any real risk and Alastor seemed to have her on more than a metaphorical leash.

"Maybe." he admitted, deciding on the path of least resistance, the one where he could try and succeed or pretend it was an unknown impossibility all along, "I don't know."

In some strange way, there was something stable about the man before her. Alastor was unpredictable, had sent her life spinning. Lucifer felt safe.

"Good enough for me!" Y/n smiled brightly, "I look forward to working with you."

---

Writing this made me really want to do a Lucifer fic with the idle hands thing.

TAGS:

@willowshadenox @i-love-jafar @elfyeet @reader3 @lazygirlfanfic0-0@kahlan170@wendyphan01203-blog @fairyv-ice @clarakainda @lunaramune @mcueveryday @luxky-aish @peterpankat @corvid007 @marukun @nanami1chu @i-like-potatoes12533 @boogiemansbitch @apenasandorinha @almond-t0fu @mygoldtears @ahellborn @winterisholding @misty-melody @themetalbabygirl @trash-shoot @clarakainda @ladyscorpion19 @dasimp777 @juskonutoh @simpingsohard @sethianaa @gabile18 @slytherin4ever

[sorcerousundries]

Bg3 band AU!headcannons

Characters: Lae’zel, Minthara, Karlach, Shadowheart

Warnings: not proofread at all

Summary: what its like dating modern!band AU! bg3 women

A/N: i might like Mintharas hands guys, also this is my return to tumblr after a vv long break so hi guys ^.^

Content under cut

Lae’zel - guitarist

Modern Lae’zel! who has your initials scratched on her guitar strap

Modern Lae’zel! who shows you her solos a week before the album released

Modern Lae’zeal! who looks for you in the crowd or backstage and sends you a small wink

Modern Lae’zel! who took you axe throwing for your first date

Modern Lae’zel! Who takes you for ice cream at 3:00 am

Modern Lae’zel! who plays her guitar for you and genuinely wants to know what you what you think about certain riffs

Modern Lae’zel! who doesn’t go clubbing after concerts, instead she cuddles with you on some random hotels watching cheesy romcoms that make her snort instead of grimace

Modern Lae’zel! who pays for a backstage pass for you despite you saying that you could pay for it yourself

Modern Lae’zel! Who hates everyone but you

Karlach - drummer

Modern karlach! Who play fights with you in the dressing room after a concert, even though she’s sweaty and gross

Modern karlach! Who sends you long paragraphs throughout the day ranging from how practice is going to how much she loves you

Modern karlach! Who posts you on her public story even though her PR team advises against it

Modern karlach! Who saves you a concert ticket anyway even if she knows you can’t come

Modern karlach! Who sends you silly pictures saying “this is us”

Modern karlach! Who always hears you despite her hearing being impaired from years of drumming

Modern karlach! Who sits behind you with her hands on your wrists showing you how to play a simple beat

Modern karlach! Who always flexes on stage, making fans go wild but she’s only ever looking at you

Modern karlach! Who always mentions you during interviews

Modern karlach! Who’s grin grows impossibly wider when she sees you in the front row

Modern karlach! Who everyone loves but she only loves you

Minthara - bassist

Modern Minthara! Who fights back a smile when she sees you in the crowd

Modern Minthara! Who sits behind you as you massage her tired fingers

Modern Minthara! Who has her hair tied up on stage but only lets it down for you

Modern Minthara! Who holds you to her side as interviewers ask her about band gossip

Modern Minthara! Who lets you run your fingers across her rough, calloused hands

Modern Minthara! Who is notorious for being the hardest member to get an autograph from but always gives you one when you jokingly ask for one

Modern Minthara! Who rants about her riffs (she’s definitely not complaining she definitely is)

Modern Minthara! who has multiple ear piercings and barely puts in her own jewellery anymore because you do it for her before she goes on stage

Modern Minthara! Who scowls when you call karlach her “work wife”

Modern Minthara! Who actually likes to be annoyed by you

Modern Minthara! who is annoyed by everyone but never you

Shadowheart - singer

Modern shadowheart! Who tries to sneak your name into song lyrics, wether it’s subtle or not is another question

Modern shadowheart! Who can’t help but turn to face your side of the crowd whenever a particularly romantic spill of lyrics comes up

Modern shadowheart! Who writes you notes and leaves them in her dressing room for you

Modern shadowheart! Who wears matching earrings with you

Modern shadow heart! Who sings under her breath when she’s focused

Modern shadowheart! Who pinches your cheeks when you compliment her in the dressing room

Modern shadowheart! Who screams about bugs but ends up being the one forced to kill them

Modern shadowheart! Who thinks about you while writing songs

Modern shadow heart! Who tells dad jokes during interviews but runs them by you backstage

Modern shadowheart! Who mutters a quick prayer before going on stage to soothe her nerves

Modern shadowheart! Who is the center of attention but her attention is always on you

[bougiebutchbitch]

NGL I do find it funny that the side of the fandom yelling “if you’re uncomfortable with the way Con showed up to a livestream with his whole bulge on prominent display you’re homophobic” is the same side of the fandom that was harboring multiple sexual predators lol throwback to the Canyon Kink Camp!! Anyway shoutout to the canyon for knowing how to be normal about people’s boundaries <3

I notice you sending this message to multiple people. On anon. Smells like teen cowardice.

So, first off -

You are lying through your teeth.

Victims of two sexual predators came forwards... and those sexual predators were immediately thrown out of the canyon. They were blocked/black-listed everywhere and deactivated! Explain to me how that is 'harbouring'?

Some weirdo also started harassing the victims because they were a friend of the perpetrators. They were...... also....... mass blocked and lost all their popularity, as far as I'm aware (I don't actually know that person, and am not on Twitter, etc.)???

Sexual predators will show up literally anywhere in society - including in your precious fandom spaces. Pretending that your half of the fandom is 'pure' and 'perfect' is, in fact, far more dangerous than acknowledging that there were predators, and dealing with them.

Especially when the antis were the ones crowing that people like me, who are abuse and rape survivors IRL, had 'no idea what abuse/rape looks like', and still are making claims like that in the tags - as well as sending asks accusing us of lying about our trauma.

All because we like a fictional character who you hate.

As for Con showing up in his underwear...

Literally nothing was showing.

You saw the SHAPE of a bulge. It was no more revealing than Tom Hiddleston's Loki outfit, and there have been uncensored gifs of that flying around willy-nilly (pun intended) for years without anyone being Shocked and Disgusted about it.

If you're not bothered by men being in underwear when you go to the beach and see guys rocking a budgie smuggler, but you're throwing a massive stink about a queer man being in his underwear on a ticketed show that was always marked as Explicit, and using it as an excuse to call him a sexual predator, I honestly don't know what to say to you.

Boundaries are real and important.

But if you went to an explicit stream and saw something mildly suggestive there, and proceed to accuse a queer man of being a sexual predator... You are the problem.

And yes, you are a homophobe.

Even if you are queer yourself, you are contributing to the dangerous rising current of accusing queer people of being 'degenerate' and 'perverse' for merely existing, because - oh, think of the children.

And that's without mentioning that Con is a vocal supporter of trans kids in the UK. We all know how queer people who dare to support trans people are unjustly painted as predators. It's happening on Tumblr, with the mass reporting and banning of trans men and women for 'inappropriate content' that is no more explicit than what cishet people have on their blogs. It's happening all over the world.

Hell, all profits from Con's livestream went to Mermaids (UK charity for trans folx) and true colours united (homeless lgbt youth charity).

Take a good long look at your argument. Take a good long look at the current political climate for queer people. Ask yourself who your insistence that Con is sexually inappropriate for... wearing underwear, is really helping.

If you feel this unsafe around even the vaguest suggestion of genitalia, the onus is on you to avoid any streams where you might encounter it. You're no different than people who read Explicit-marked work on AO3 and leave hatemail for the authors because you encountered smut.

[copperbadge]

Sports Night In The Ask

franticbindings

It'd be interesting if the traditional bow fishing thing pointed to sport archery also being a thing. Like your high school might have an archery team.

beledibabe

It would be fun if A-S had some arcane local game, now mainly played by old men and women in cafe gardens using home-made equipment. Maybe similar to petanque or bocce? And of course, it can get cut-throat. ::g::

I love that these two comments came in right next to each other because I think you guys are on to something. Definitely archery is considered a cultural tradition, both bowfishing in specific and bow sport in general. They probably do regularly send Shivadh archers to the Olympics and they probably do extremely well.

It would be super fun to invent a local sport -- as you say, like bocce, that was my thought too -- that incorporates archery somehow. I know there are some mounted archery traditions in Mongolia that I think have formalized games attached (I know they have formal competition, I just am not sure there's like, team games).

But it would also be fun for there to be a running joke about a local Shivadh sport that doesn't exist -- kind of like Calvinball meets Mornington Crescent. Something to tell the tourists about, like "Oh yeah you just missed the annual Lofingi games, they were epic this year." And explaining the rules of Lofingi is just an exercise in improv.

("Fingi" in Italian is "fake it" in the second person imperative; "lo fingi" isn't grammatical, I believe it's actually fingilo, but it's basically "I order you to fake it.")

oft-goes-awry

"There is no golf. Michaelis detests it personally." Sam, after having gone to the Masters the last couple of years (my dad has tickets and you couldn't PAY my mom to go), I would LOVE to see his face when confronted with the utter surreality that Augusta National during Master's Week.

I don't know that we've ever seen Michaelis properly seethe, but that might be the time for it!

Realistically, it's not even that he hates golf on principle. There are a lot of reasons to dislike golf from a social standpoint, at least the modern game -- and he's obviously not in favor of massive water-sucking gatekept tax shelters, not to mention there's a strong historical affiliation between golf and racism, golf and antisemitism.

But he also just...doesn't like playing it. (I feel this way about bowling.)

He understands that for people at his level it's mostly a way to have private conversations and do networking. I think he'd find Master's Week fascinating from that standpoint; he'd know how to work it to get what he wants. And he's an outdoorsy guy, he likes hiking and being out in nature, you'd think walking around outside for several hours would appeal to him. But you're tethered to the stupid little ball and the obnoxious people you're playing with and there IS the creepy gatekeeping and it's not like it's nature nature.

One time Noah showed him one of those memes about "turn all golf courses into public sex forests" and he plaintively asked "Can't we just rewild them?" and Jes laughed so hard they fell off their chair.

[kfaem]

Love and Deepspace; when their S/O is a kpop idol

notes: brrr new fandom lets go. also yes i went MIA but hey im not like dead

the boys when MC is an idol :) this is self indulgent. im a zayne girlie but i got carried away with raf lol. im tired so this is unedited, poorly written, no structure, and kinda just rambling

Rafayel:

here me out

he was a fan for the longest time, creating multiple pieces based off of you and your likeness

you and your members go to one of his exhibitions and when you make eye contact he's immediately in love more than he was before

kinda in a weird way

but when you approach him first he's in shock and doesnt know what to do

after the initial talking period and when the relationship starts he acts like his normal self

attends every concert and fan meeting

spends hundreds of dollars on your albums, collecting your photocards and solo posters

brags about being your boyfriend on sns and your manager tries to get him to stop

thomas is so embarrassed everytime your manager reaches out and begs him to calm down cause its a bad image

doesnt care about the reporters, is willing to fight with elites over you and your reputation

he's a simp but is also kinda mean sometimes lol

is jealous when you go live and refuse to respond to him to at least an hour and makes his presence known in your chat

i find the image of the matching outfits, couples goals posts on sns, and articles where he names you his muse to just be so <3333

Xavier

You guys bumped into each other at a convenience store, both reaching for the same bag of chips

both flustered with red cheeks, you let him have it and apologized

awkward

so, so very awkward

both of you are stuck in a awkward, silent encounter and neither of you want to say anything

one of your members comes over to see whats taking you so long and realizes that you're in a standoff with a cute blond and decides to play cupid

it worked

you two end up becoming good friends, and then eventually some sort of situationship

he doesnt want to damage your career and acknowledges that you both dont have time to spend with each other

but still acts as a loving boyfriend, buying your albums, concert tickets, merch, birthday specials etc.

then when you guys go on a snack run, a reporter recognizes you and within the week you're caught up in dating rumours

deciding that you guys couldnt avoid the truth, the situationship turned into a real relationship

doesnt really make a big deal out of your relationship or your popularity. would rather spend your guys' spare time reading together, watching movies, eating good food and relaxing

the media eventually forgets but the fans dont

they love every piece of media that ever gets showed, glimpses of xavier in mirrors, reflections on water, glasses, windows. mentions of a lover in interviews when asked what inspired you

just a loving boyfriend who tries to give you a sense of normalcy outside of the flashing lights

Zayne

Childhood friends

he hates your career and how much soul it has taken from you, but also acknowledges that you love what you do and are willing to risk your health and privacy

zayne is the king of situationship lmao

dates all the time, dinners at small restaurants hiding in booths in the far corners since you both like to be alone, together

your members genuinely dont understand how hes "not your boyfriend"

has lingered on music video shoots, using his title as your personal doctor to not raise any eyebrows

doesnt go out of his way to buy your albums but... if hes at a corner store and sees it, he'll buy it. or two. or three.

keeps one of your photocards and a normal picture of you in his wallet, grayson found it on the floor in his office once after it fell out of his wallet and he could never live it down

the entire hospital staff knows but wouldnt say anything for fear of their life

always sending messages no matter what side of the world youre on. Please remember to eat, drink water, and rest as much as you can. Too much strain on your body can cause long-term side effects.

buys tickets to your concerts, trying to hold back his smile as you glow on the stage while performing in front of your many fans

yeah he gets jealous

wont say it

and you can barely tell

but the chill that fills the room when another idol hugs you and is being overly touchy is so very much obvious and has people rushing to do something else

a reporter approaches him and tries to ask about your dating life. he shuts them up with a glare. the reporter doesnt even dare publishing that article.

your fans have a basic idea of what zayne is to you, but they respect you enough to not make a scene of it.

then one of your members gets drunk on a live and asks about your boyfriend and it comes unravelled

you post a picture with him, captioned with a heart, and its never brought up again

has brought your fans food and drinks whenever they set up cafe events for support

he appreciates everything that your fans do for you and has asked them to take care of you when hes not around

your relationship is never actually made official but yall live together when you arent required to be at the dorms and own like two cats so idk

still the caregiver that we love

[fairsexynasty]

Heyy, could you do a Chad imagine of him being clingy? (Where they’re dating)

warnings: fluff! some angst if you squint, references to liv’s death

chad is the most doting boy of all time. though he’s a himbo, he’s very set on how much he loves you, and never fails to show it in the loveliest of ways. he showers you with compliments, spends as much time as humanly possible with you, and makes sure every single day is better than the last. with that being said, he really is around you almost 24/7. the only time you’re ever really apart, is in class, or when you have to go to the bathroom.

chad wakes up with you, eats with you, gets ready in the morning with you, showers with you, etc, etc. the man is always holding your hand or has an arm slung around your shoulders, to show that you’re his and he’s yours. it’s never really bothered you how he begs to come with you on nights out with your friends, or when he begs you to accompany him when he hangs out with ethan or tara. he just can’t get enough of you. he’s pretty akin to a cute puppy who follows you everywhere.

he gets a little upset whenever you have to leave without him, but you make it up in kisses whenever you come back home to him. sometimes, you can see him waiting for you outside your lecture hall for the last ten minutes of class, and as soon as you’re out the door, he’s pulling you into your arms.

chad is also very much so your passenger princess. he has his own car, but says that saving gas money is more convenient for the both of you, because he ends up splitting the cost every time. he follows you around grocery stores and runs through every aisle when he loses you, sometimes asking people if they’ve see you after giving a detailed description of your features. “have you seen someone who literally looks perfect? black shirt, big jacket, perfect lips?”

like i’ve mentioned in the previous drabble, chad hates when your friends hog you. he’s not afraid to get into fights with mindy when she asks you to come over to her and anika’s for a movie night. sometimes, he shoos tara away when she sits next to you on the couch.

chad also has no concept of personal space with you. he loves having you cuddled into him when hanging out, or he’s fiddling around with every piece of clothing or jewelry on your body.

he sends you texts at every hour, and sometimes spams a “y/n babeeee wya” when you dont reply. you have each other on the find my friends app, and sometimes he randomly pops up wherever you are.

one time, you were with tara and sam at the movie theatre, and you spotted chad two rows in front of you.

“why are you here? did you buy your own ticket just to stalk me?”

“okay, first off, i actually wanted to watch the barbie movie, secondly, i’m just making sure you’re safe!”

you understand completely where his concern comes from, due to liv and the events at woodsboro, but you reassure him that you will always be safe, and will call him if anything seemed sketchy.

sometimes your friends get a little pissed when he shows up out of the blue or never lets you go, so you have a talk with him to make sure everyone stays happy.

“chad, babe, i love you so very much. but sometimes, i need some alone time. with my friends. no boyfriend.”

“but why?”

“because when my lovely boyfriend is around 24/7, people won’t be able to see us as our own people. does that make sense?”

“i guess.” he says that with a small pout.

[brerosee]

Dinner with the parents//Alyssa Thompson

Authors notes:this was a request I’m not good at writing actual fics so I’m sorry I’ll try my best to get to your requests bare with me thank youu😊

To say Alyssa was terrified was an understatment. Today was the day she would be meeting your parents for the first time, and she was so scared of what they would think of her.

Your and Alyssa's relationship is still fairly new having only been dating for 4 months as of last week,but who's counting? So here you are getting ready in your shared bathroom of your apartment and you hear alyssa call out your name.

"Y/N, please come here" alyssa called out in a shaky voice. you set down your makeup you were applying and walk over to her, "Is this too much,should i change?" She asks franticaly. You smile softly walking over to her and grab her face "you look perfect." You say in a reassuring tone.

you knew she was nervous but you already knew your parents would love her, I mean who wouldnt? "what if they hate me." Alyssa says once again in a frantic tone. "what if they dont want me to see you anymore." She says.

"Alyssa honey they already do love you,they know how good you treat me and they basically already like you more than me." you say with a soft laugh.

Alyssa looks into your eyes "i love you." she whispers, 'I love you too, but we really need to get a move on or we will be late and then they really wont like you." you say walking away laughing.

Once you arrive at your parents house you can feel Ayssa's hand sweating it was the whole way here as she made you drive because she quite frankly could not stop shaking.

You walk into your parents house without knocking and yell out "Mom,Dad?" you walk into the living room and having to pull alyssa with you. You see your dad sitting with your older brother who was visiting from college, he is only 2 years older than you. they look up from the football game they were watching "Hey there they are" your dad says walking over to you pulling you into a hug.

Your dad lets you go and you pull your brother into a hug while your dad looks over to Alyssa, and your poor girlfriend looks scared to death she steps out from behind you and sticks her hand out to shake your dads hand, but instead he pulls her into a hug.

your mom walks out from the kitchen from hearing the comotion and sees Alyssa and walks straight past you to pull her into a bone crushing hug "Im so happy to finally meet you, Just call me mom your family now." she holds onto her shoulders.

"Goodness were are my manners are you hungry? im making pasta i hope thats ok?" your mom says still not even looking at you. "that sounds perfect thank you." Alyssa says still shocked by the warm welcome.

"Oh Y/n im so sorry come here." your mom says and grabbing you and hugging you. "y/n you help me cook, Alyssa you can sit down and relax." your mom says pulling you into the kitchen.

Alyssa stands there looking at you not knowing what to do, you jsut send her a sympathetic look knowing how worried she still is.

She walks into the living room taking a seat next to your brother on the couch. "So alyssa what do you do?" your dad asks curiosly. "oh i um play soccer for Angel City FC and also play for the national team."she says

"oh wow so you play professional, you know back in my day i played i little, might have to teach you some tricks." your dad says jokinly. Alyssa laughs and then hears your mom call out saying dinner was ready.

You all sit the dinner table and you hold alyssa's hand under the table. "So alyssa Y/n has told us so much about you,says you play soccer?" your mom says breaking the silence.

"Yeah i do we have a game next week actually if yall would like to come i could get you tickets." alyssa says looking around at them. "We would love to come!" your dad says smiling at her

After dinner you guys decide to play a few board games you losing and end up pouting but its whatever. Alyssa seemed to be having a great time and your parents and brother get along great with her and you couldnt be happier.

So when you and alyssa finally are home in your shared bed getting ready to go to sleep she looks over at you "Thank you." she says "for what?" you ask confused.

"For letting me meet them i reall hope i made a good impression."she says moving closer to you putting her arms around you holding you close to her.

'They loved you." you say pushing your face into her neck cuddling into her. "i love you.' Alyssa says holding you tighter. When you dont answer she looks down at you sleeping peacfully. she jsut smiles and kisses your forhead drifting off to sleep aswell.

[roopnavarro]

Spotting Misogyny in the Mad Max Fandom: A Handy Guide

What IS Misogyny

Pull up any Mad Max Facebook group, the comments section on the official Furiosa marketing posts, or the comments section on any Furiosa video on YouTube. You'll find whiners screeching things like "boohoo we can't even have Max in Mad Max BECAUSE OF WOKE." You'll see them blaming the movie's modest box office returns on the fact that the movie has an "ICKY GIRL PROTAGONIST WITH COOTIES." If you get really unlucky when seeing misogynistic content, you might even find some really gross dirty AI deepfake pics of ATJ or Charlize as Furiosa.

What is NOT Misogyny

An artist drew some characters that aren't Furiosa. AND/OR The fandom likes some male characters from Furiosa. If you feel the need to consider this misogyny, consider the following points: 1. Waffles vs. pancakes. If someone says "I love waffles!" it's absurd to read into that message and assume it carries the hidden meaning of "I hate pancakes!" If someone draws some male characters from "Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga," it's equally absurd to assume they're doing this as a malicious and misogynistic act against Furiosa. ALSO If you think "No Furiosa in this pic = misogyny," then do you think "No Big Jilly, Fang, or other POC character in fan art = racist"? I'm guessing no. Because that would be silly. And probably because you're just morally grandstanding and slinging bad-faith accusations as a way to justify your temper tantrum about not getting free content of your blorbo. ----- 2. Everyone making fan art for "Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga" is someone who saw the movie and was passionate about it, despite it being an under-marketed movie that didn't strike gold at the box office. Most of us didn't have any IRL friends that saw the movie. For those of us who followed the hype (or lack thereof) leading up to the film, there was a bunch of backlash from actual misogynists over the film just straight-up existing. (Like all those manbaby whiners on the gamergate grifter side of YouTube) . And it's not like the fandom is riding a cultural tidal wave — the people making fan art are genuinely expressing their love for the film and its universe. We're not farming internet points or drawing these "popular male characters" for some nefarious purpose. Some people just happen to attach to different characters. Does that bother you? Learn to blacklist tags. ----- 3. If you wanna go fight misogyny in the MM fandom, go over to Facebook and Reddit and get into an internet slapfight with one of the many middle-aged neckbeards screaming shit like "MAD MAX HAS GONE WOKE REEEEEEE." But nah, it's probably easier to send shitty anon asks to artists, isn't it? What do you think you're doing? Do you think you're owed an apology because someone made high-effort fan art, but without your blorbo? Do you think you're creating some kind of positive change in the world or the fandom by whinging anonymously in the ask box of an artist? ----- 4. There's plenty of content of Furiosa (the character.) Aside from there being, y'know, a whole damn movie dedicated to her, she was pretty much Tumblr's darling from 2015-2016, and remains a popular character for art and fic. Yay! That's great! Go feast on those! Every artist in this fandom is not obligated to feed you. We all have our fixations. And if you want that content so damn badly, make it yourself or pay someone to. ----- 4. Also, if you feel the need to go through someone's blog to see if they've reblogged enough Furiosa to pass your litmus test, you're being a weirdo. Stop it. Get some help. What are you, a cop? Do you think you can just pull random artists over and go through their reblogs to determine their "guilt" or "innocence," with regards to your accusations? It's as if you're a highway patrol officer checking out someone's history of traffic violations when determining whether to issue them a speeding ticket.

-----

So there you have it. TL;DR, it's some deeply terminally online clown behavior to attach moral weight to how many ATJ gifs and Furiosa drawings someone has on their blogs. Quit slinging bad-faith assumptions at fellow members of the fandom.

[endofradio]

FRAGMENTS OF FEAR — CHAPTER 5: I HATE YOU, I LOVE YOU

PROLOGUE | CHAPTER 1 | CHAPTER 2 | CHAPTER 3 | CHAPTER 4

WARNINGS: NSFW (*extremely loud cheering and applause*)

NOTES: the frank simps are gonna love this one… anyways this chapter’s gonna be a bit unique in the sense i’m gonna be doing some perspective switching. there’ll be some flashback scenes that’ll be italicized to distinguish them from the main scene.

also i couldn’t find a gif to use for this chapter so i just used a random frank one.

SUMMARY: FRANK AND SYLVIE FINALLY SMASH!!! 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉

WORD COUNT: 2,375

TAGS: @reclaimedbythesea @creelmalfoylaufeyson69 @blackwolfstabs @atcarpenter @evildarliing @maggotmommys @maggotssmichael @xashleyo03x @witchy-weve-monbebe

if you’d like to be added to my taglist, feel free to shoot me a message or send an ask to my inbox! the support means a lot :)

“If you take one step closer…”

Adam took another step towards the jail cell, leaning against the wall. “Then what?” He asked, staring at Sylvie with that signature cocky smirk that pissed her off to no end. “What are you gonna do about it? You’re stuck in there, y’know.”

Sylvie narrowed her eyes at the man, her expression full of irritation. “Fuck you…” was all she could respond with.

Adam toyed with the ID badge that was around his neck. “Look, I know you really wanna get out of here…”

Sylvie rolled her eyes, letting out a scoff. “No shit.” She grumbled. “Being stuck in a jail cell was the very last thing on my mind, y’know.”

Adam chuckled. “You got yourself into this mess. You realize that, right? You were the one driving around drunk off your ass. I just happened to be there when it happened.”

“What were you doing at that party, anyway?” Sylvie asked, her eyes narrowing further. “There was nothing to investigate. It was just a typical college party.”

Adam shrugged. “That would be confidential information.” He muttered. “I don’t have to tell you anything, anyway.”

He looked back at Sylvie. “Tell you what…”

Sylvie raised an eyebrow. “What?”

“I’ll let you out early if you give me a little kiss.”

Sylvie let out a scoff. “Fuck off.”

“Just one quick, little kiss. Could be your ticket to freedom. Nobody’s watching, if you’re worried about that.”

“You have a fucking wife.”

“She doesn’t have to know. She doesn’t know about half the shit I’m up to, anyway… like going to strip clubs with the other lieutenants.” Adam let out a mischievous chuckle. “Besides… you’re prettier than her, anyway.”

Sylvie didn’t answer, her silence combined with her annoyed stare being enough of a response.

“Aw, c’mon. It’s not like I’m askin’ you to fuck me. Though, I wouldn’t exactly be opposed to that idea, either…”

“I’m not fucking kissing you, you creep.”

Adam moved away from the wall. “Your loss, then.”

As annoyed as Sylvie was, she wasn’t bothering to back away from the man.

Why?

Sylvie reached for Frank’s glasses, taking them off of his face and placing them on the bedside table. As soon as she did that, he captured her lips in another rough kiss, pulling her impossibly closer to him, his hand firmly gripping her hip. Hell, this was like a dream come true for him.

And then, it happened.

Both of them quietly gasped against each other’s lips, and Sylvie quickly wrapped an arm around Frank’s neck. Slowly, he began to take her right then and there, and as she looked up at him, Sylvie could see his eyes darkening with desire.

She couldn’t believe this was happening. This was the man she was supposed to hate, yet here she was, underneath him. All the memories started to hit her like a truck.

Sylvie felt Frank’s lips touch her neck again, and she tightly shut her eyes as she tried to suppress a whimper. Each time he rocked his hips against hers, Sylvie felt herself drowning — drowning in a sea of ecstasy. She actually didn’t want him to stop.

She felt Frank nip at her neck, and that sent another jolt of pleasure through her. She tried so hard not to make a sound, but the smallest of a whimper left her lips.

She had never felt anything during sex… until now. With him. Why?

All the other times had just simply been poor decisions fueled by intoxication — one-night stands that never made her feel anything except for regret, emptiness, and shame. She didn’t even feel anything for the men she hooked up with. The majority of the time, she never even saw them again.

But… no. This… this was different. Five years later, Frank ended up back in her life again. Was this meant to happen? Fate, perhaps?

Sylvie wanted to hate Frank, but it seemed that especially now, she couldn’t bring herself to. It was like he had gotten under her skin, and she couldn’t get him out. Why was she feeling this way? He wasn’t any good for her. He wasn’t a good person.

Why do I become attached to what isn’t right for me?

But… this, all of this… it felt so good.

“I’ve dreamed of havin’ you at my mercy.” Frank quietly whispered against Sylvie’s neck. The words sent feverish chills down her spine. “It’s nice to have you not being a smart-ass for a change…”

Sylvie wanted to tell him to shut up, but she couldn’t. All she could manage was another quiet gasp as Frank continued to nip at the sensitive skin on her neck. She was fighting an internal battle with her own mind. He was putting her under a spell at this very moment, and she couldn’t break out of it, even if she tried.

Frank pulled away from Sylvie’s neck, grabbing her face with his hand and moving it so she was looking directly at him. He looked down at her and noticed how her face was flushed, her lips were parted, and her eyes were flickering with desire. It stroked his ego even further to know that he was the one responsible for it. Yeah, he had been attracted to her before, but he was even more attracted to her now.

“I’ve spent the past five years thinking about you.”

“But… how? We… only knew each other for… a few months.”

“You’re still driving me fuckin’ insane. You always have. The way you look, the way you talk, the way you act… y’know what would be nice?”

Frank leaned in closer than he already was, his lips brushing against hers. “You whispering my name… like a prayer to God. Over and over again. I would kill just to hear that…”

Am I dying? Am I dead? Is this what it feels like to die?

Sylvie couldn’t take it anymore. He was genuinely killing her. Every word that came out of his mouth was dangerous. Fatal.

Frank’s pace increased just a little, and even that was just about sending her into overdrive. There was almost a primal look in his eyes now as he looked at her, and then he pulled her into another deep kiss, unable to get enough of her taste. It was like a drug that he was hooked on. He wanted more, more, more.

“You’re liking this, aren’t you?” Frank quietly asked against Sylvie’s lips. “I think I know how you really feel about me. You need my attention, my touch.”

Yes. She needed to feel wanted. Desired.

“Let me…” Sylvie then whispered.

Frank rolled the two of them over so that way Sylvie was now on top of him, her legs wrapping around his waist.

And then, she lowered herself onto him.

“What’s your deal with me?”

Adam shrugged, leaning against the wall. “What do you mean by that?” He asked, his voice dripping with mock innocence.

“Why you just won’t leave me alone.”

Adam let out a small chuckle as he looked at Sylvie, noticing how she was looking at him with that irritated expression that he honestly loved seeing. “It’s because it’s fun.”

“Fun?” Sylvie repeated, narrowing her eyes at him. “The fuck do you mean fun?”

“It’s just the way you get,” Adam answered casually, walking towards the cell door until he was standing right in front of it. “I don’t know if anyone’s told you this, but ‘angry’ is a good look on you. Maybe that’s why I like getting on your nerves so much… you look good when you’re pissed at me.”

Ignoring Adam’s words, Sylvie instead chose to focus on the fact he was standing right in front of her, the only thing separating them being the cell door. “You’re… close.” She commented.

Adam smirked, taking out a key from his pocket and waving it in front of her. “I could get closer…” He whispered, almost teasingly.

Sylvie found herself genuinely considering it. Did she dare let him in? Her eyes darted to the chair in the corner of the cell before meeting Adam’s gaze again.

“Fine.” She muttered. “Just… keep your distance.”

Sylvie went to sit on the bed, watching nervously as Adam unlocked the door, closing it behind him as he slowly stepped inside. He walked over to the chair and sat down on it, staring directly at Sylvie.

“Let me ask you something.”

Sylvie tilted her head as she looked at the man. “Like… what?” She questioned.

“How does it feel to be alone?”

Sylvie sighed. “Not good.”

“I suppose we have that in common.”

“You’re alone, too?”

Adam nodded. “Very much so.”

With each roll of her hips, Sylvie felt the heat gradually pooling in her abdomen starting to grow in intensity. She was gasping for breath at this point, the ecstasy making her feel dizzy.

As she looked down at him, Sylvie watched Frank’s eyes flutter closed as he tried to bite back a noise, but he couldn’t, a small groan escaping his lips. In all honesty, seeing Frank at her mercy now was somewhat satisfying. It was as though the two of them were both trying to have control over each other. In Sylvie’s case, it was a form of revenge against Frank. Instead of him having power over her, she now had power over him… and it felt great.

“I thought you said to be quiet,” Sylvie whispered, her voice slightly teasing.

Frank’s eyes blinked open, and he looked up at Sylvie, his eyes narrowing. “You bitch.” He muttered, a small smirk tugging at his lips. “You’re the one who’s fuckin’ doing this shit to me.”

Then, he unexpectedly pulled her further down onto him, claiming her lips in yet another heated kiss. In reaction, Sylvie let out a stifled yelp against his lips. Frank tightened his grip on her writhing body, his brows furrowing as he fought to maintain what was left of his self-control. His hips met hers with every movement, his muscles tensing up.

“You’re strugglin’ to be quiet yourself, sweetheart.”

Frank then sat up, pulling Sylvie closer to him as he started to lavish her neck with kisses and bites again. She was firmly gripping onto his shoulders, her nails starting to dig into his skin as her pace started to quicken. As she tilted her head back, Frank’s name — his real name — slipped from her lips in a whisper.

“Adam…”

Frank could’ve sworn his heart stopped for a second when he heard Sylvie say his name like that. He needed to hear it again and again until he could vividly hear her sweet little voice in his head.

“Say it again.” He murmured, his voice bordering on pleading. “And again…”

Sylvie was almost on the verge of tears from the pleasure she was experiencing. It was nothing like she had felt before. It was almost too much for her to handle at this point, evident in the way she was beginning to tremble in Frank’s arms. “A… Adam…”

She was whispering his name like she was quietly calling out to God, each repetition sounding more desperate than the last. Both of them knew that she was close, just about teetering on the edge. So was Frank, but he was barely hanging on, waiting to witness Sylvie reach the end first — he needed to see it, knowing it would probably be the most beautiful thing he had ever seen in his life.

Sylvie pushed Frank back down on the bed, her knuckles just about turning white as she gripped the bedsheets. The heat in her abdomen was getting stronger and stronger, and she felt like a coil that was mere seconds away from snapping.

Her hips started to stutter as she got closer and closer, her eyes fluttering closed as her breath hitched. “Oh my God…” She gasped. “Oh my… God…”

Frank let out another quiet groan, and then another…

And then, Sylvie finally snapped. When her climax came over her, it was the most intense thing she had experienced in her life. Her head was pounding, she felt dizzier than before, and her body began to tremble even more. Her entire body felt heavy, and she felt like she couldn’t support herself anymore. She shut her eyes even tighter, letting out a strangled yelp as she felt her release completely possess her.

Frank rolled the two of them over again, finishing himself off, muffling his own sounds by burrowing his face in the crook of Sylvie’s neck. When it was all over, Frank just lay there on top of her, both of them struggling to catch their breaths. He eventually lifted his head to look at her, noticing how she looked completely wrecked, and it was all because of him.

“You’re shaking.”

Sylvie looked up at Frank, her eyes wide as the reality of what had just happened sunk in. She didn’t even know what to say. Nothing felt real to her right now.

“I… am…?” She quietly asked, her voice unsteady.

Frank slowly nodded, a shit-eating grin slowly forming on his face. “That good, huh?”

Sylvie tried to fight back a small smile, but she couldn’t resist. “Shut up…” She muttered. “It’s just…”

“Just what?” Frank asked, shifting to lie down next to her.

“No one’s… ever…” Sylvie’s voice trailed off as she tried to steady her breathing. “No one’s… ever… made me feel like… this…”

She took a deep breath, her eyes wandering up towards the ceiling. She then looked back at Frank, noticing the stupid cocky grin on his face. “What’s the look for?” She asked.

“So, was I right?”

“Right about what?”

“You lying about hating my guts.”

Sylvie sighed. “Yeah… maybe. Maybe I was lying.”

“That’s three things you’ve lied about. Well, technically four, because you said you never lie… which was a lie in itself.”

Sylvie rolled her eyes. “Yeah, I know…”

“You’re an awful liar.”

“And you have quite the ego.”

Sylvie tried to sit up as if she was considering leaving the bed, but Frank pulled her down against his chest. “You’re not goin’ anywhere.”

“Go to sleep.”

Sylvie fell asleep before Frank, and when she did, he couldn’t help but find it strangely… endearing.

[arachnoia]

avoiding | miguel o'hara

miguel o’hara x nb reader drabble

a/n | hey loves! first thank you so much for all the support on my last post, it means a lot!! I just made this as a drabble because I couldn’t sleep !! enjoy 😭

warnings- miguel acting a lil soft? reader is a spanish-speaker and understands what miguel tells them, sfw fluff, random drabble that sol came up with at 2 and it's a tad bit rushed &lt;3

————————————————------------------------------------------

“alrighty but that movie was literally life changing and amazing,” hobie said, motioning the characters in said movie he went to go see with pavi, miles. and gwen.

“oh my gosh yes. but i hated how the ending was “to be continued” like are you seriously telling me that i spent 2 hours just to be slapped with ‘to be continued’ LIKE-“ pavi stopped himself before he could start yelling about the ending and sipped his chai.

gwen glanced at you and smiled sadly, “you should’ve came with us, y/n! hobie was treating us to popcorn.”

“ahem. my guy STOLE the popcorn.” miles said, rolling his eyes while pointing to hobie.

“hey, i don’t believe in paying for that because it’s the movies and technically we should be treated to that popcorn nevertheless. tickets are expensive as it is,” hobie countered.

“no, it’s okay! i needed to handle an anomaly in some other universe with jess and peter. it was really sudden but it’s fine,” you sighed as you stretched your arms.

“i’ll get going now. bye guys!” you stood up from the cafeteria table, waving to your group, and started route out of the cafeteria.

you haven’t felt this tired in such a long time. it’s been almost 4 months since you’ve join the society and all you have been doing are missions on top of missions.

not even gwen or hobie get as many and they’ve been here longer

what’s the worse thing of it all? (except having to deal with all the back pain?): having to face him.

who’s “him”? miguel o’hara.

as a regularly optimistic person, you rarely would feel nervous to talk to anyone. that is until you met miguel and would freeze up if he was within a 25ft radius. hobie would especially tease you about it since all you knew was to say infront of him were “yes sir”, “okay”, “mhm”, and “alright”.

that was in the first week and it was actually fucking embarrassing. that was until you began forming a friendship with him which lead you both to turn pretty close.

but then he started sending you on extra missions and he started avoiding you.

although it stung, it pissed you off since you already had a job in your universe as an editor at the Daily Bugle and now this? it also turns out avoiding him as well didn’t stop him from sending you on every goddamn mission available, which pissed you off even more.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“hey o’harararara! how’s your day been goin?” you said as you swung up to his platform. teasing miguel has been apart of your daily routine now.

“what’s up now n/n? it was alright,” he sighed as he zoned into the ministers infront of him.

“i’m telling him he needs a break but he won’t listen to me so you tell him,” lyla whispered, popping up out of thin air.

“c’mon o’hara. necesitas un descanso, estupido,” you said, grabbing his shoulders from the back of his seat.

miguel looked at your reflection on the ministers and you swore you saw a smile creep onto his face.

“let me finish this one thing and i’ll take a break,” he said as lyla looked at you two with a stunned expression.

“I told you, he likes you better than me.”

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

as you tried to make your way to the restroom to splash water on your face, hobie popped up from your side and taller you on the shoulder.

“hey n/n, miguel wants to talk to you.”

oh fuck.

“oh? for what reason?” you asked, not hiding the clear irritation in your tone and on your face.

“he didn’t specify but he wanted me to call you over? said it was deeply important,” he said in a serious tone before he busted out laughing hysterically, leaving you startled.

“oh my gosh n/n, you should have seen the look on your bloody face, man! it was fucking hilarious-“

“what’s hilarious?”

you and hobie turn around to see the person you’ve been talking about.

hobie hugs you and lets out a hearty laugh, “oh boss, it’s nothin. I was just joking here with n/n about something very strange.”

yeah, miguel o’hara is pretty fucking strange alright.

miguel’s face turned from stoic to confused (and a little mad? hobie couldn’t tell) quick, earning a smirk from hobie, “n/n?? who the hell is n/n?”

“oh it’s my dear friend y/n over here! she’s amaz-“

“claro que sí. anyways y/l/n, i need to speak with you later. meet me in my office,” miguel said as he went back to his stoic self before his exchange with hobie and left.

“holy shit I did not mean for that to happen-“ before hobie could say anything else, you patted his shoulder.

“no. it’s whatever. i’ll see you around hobie,” you said as you left hobie there, bamboozled as to what the hell just happened.

———————————————————————————-----------------

you marched to his office after every spider left and stood there, an old and familiar feeling of anxiety settling in your stomach.

what were you going to say? what did he want to say? what was going to happen? was miguel going to fire you?! you didn’t want to be fired you loved this job, even though you’re tired of the extra missions. then you felt your heart pang

your thoughts were interrupted when you heard someone talking.

“y’know as someone who has to see you two all the time it’s sad not seeing you guys interact. plus you were too shy to go actually talk to her!” that was lyla? who’s she talking about? was she talking to miguel or margo? what?

“i know and i miss her too but like i haven’t felt that way about a person for such a long time, lyla. you know this.” yep that’s miguel but who’s “her”?

all these questions were going to be answered until you accidentally sneezed and everything went silent from the other side of the doors.

“I think that’s her, miguel. maybe you should go answer. I think you should-"

“yeah I know, lyla. thanks for your assistance you can go now,” miguel said, running his fingers through his hair and sighing.

“y/l/n, you can come in.”

you rush into the room and take a deep breath.

“listen y/n-“

“no, o’hara, YOU listen. I think I need a break from all of these missions. I don’t know what’s going on because I know for a fact that missions haven’t been increasing in general. they’ve only been increasing for me and I don't like it how you're avoiding me and-“

“i’m sorry.”

he’s what?

you stared at him confused as he scratched the back of his head awkwardly. you could practically cut the tension with a knife.

“pues quieres que lo repite de nuevo? I’m sorry. I just-“ miguel stopped and looked to the side.

lyla popped out again and rolled her eyes. “what he’s trying to say is that he’s sorry for sending you out and wants to give you a break…”

“-and didn’t want to get attached because he started to grow some little sparkly feelings for youuuu!”

“AY WHAT-“ before miguel could react properly, lyla left, giggling in the process.

“sparkly feelings? no sabía que eso era que sentías por mí, o'hara,” you said, chuckling a bit. you felt like this couldn't be real.

you also swore you saw miguel turn a little red.

“pues si, I mean I didn’t-“

“-want to get attached? I get it, miguel. and it’s fine because I know what you’ve been through and it’s okay.”

you went over to hug him. you felt bad and and miguel turned as stiff as a rock.

“supongo que también siento ‘sparkly feelings’ por ti, miguel,” you whispered. you didn't know what came upon you but it felt fun to tease him a bit. you couldn't believe how miguel o'hara could be nervous because he likes you.

"hm. interesting," he said, chuckling a bit and letting go. "i'd recommended to get some rest now. tomorrow's going to be a long day for you, n/n."

you froze and glared at him. "i thought i was getting a break? the hell happened?" before he swung and left his own office, leaving you confused as hell as to what just happened.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

translations -

supongo que también siento ‘sparkly feelings’ por ti, miguel | i guess i also have those 'sparkly feelings' for you too, miguel

pues si | well yeah

no sabía que eso era que sentías por mí, o'hara | i didn't know that's how you felt about me, o'hara

pues quieres que lo repite de nuevo? | well do you want me to repeat it again?

claro que si | yeah of course

necesitas un descanso, estupido | you need a break, stupid

[ariscats]

Jameson analyzes part 2: Traumas (or a very long rant against Emily Laughin, who I cant be bother to learn how to spell her last name)

“Cause I've made some real big mistakes/ But you make the worst one look fine/ I should've known it was strange/ You only come out at night/ I used to think I was smart/ But you made me look so naive/ The way you sold me for parts/ As you sunk your teeth into me, oh/ Bloodsucker, famefucker/ Bleedin' me dry, like a goddamn vampire”

So there is this girl, who comes at his house every summer and has a heart diesse. She cant live so everyone has to do whatever she asks to make it up for it. Then one day she gets a surgery and now she gets to live, and who is her ticket to living? Jameson and Grayson.

Emily is his first kiss. However, 3 seconds after SHE KISSES HIS BROTHER WHO HE ALREADY INSECURE ABOUT BECAUSE OF HIS F. GRANDFATHER. And you have to be pretty dumd to not realize that what emily really wanted in the scene is Grayson to kiss her and she just used Jameson because she could (I still can’t believe that Emily did “loved” Gray more than Jameson).

Then she moves to his city and goes to his school. And, as far as a bitch she is, she must have been rl something because she became the most popular girl at school.

(Now, this is where things get tricky. I’m going to use the version fo what I believe happened. If you have another version you can picture like that)

Then they start dating. They borh want to live and do things because they can rather because they should. She got her golden ticket to freedom and he got the attention he’s been craving his whole life. They do everything together because she wants more and he wants more and nothing is never enough for them. So Jameson takes her to do everything they have the right to because Jameson is, at te end of the day, a good boyfriend.

But, its still not enough for Emily. Because she goes after fucking Grayson AND HE DOES THE SAME TING AS JAMESON BECAUSE THEY ARE THE OPOSITE SIDE OF THE SAME COIN.

Then they start fighting. Best friends for their whole life, but they slowly start to hate each other because fucking Emily turned everything INTO A GAME, MAKING LOVE A GAME THE SAME WAY TJEIR FAMILY HAS BEEN TRAUMATAZING THEM THEIR WHOLE LIFES. AND SHE KEEPS A FUCKING SCORE OF WHO HAS MORE POINTS, BY VOICE RECORDING.

Then one beautifull day Rebecca decides that betrayl by both ends doesnt hurts and tells Jameson about the scores and sends him the audio Emily made.

Jameson Hawthorne had to listen the girl he ruined his life for for over a year sumarize him and his love as some points. He breaks up with her, and she decides to go after Grayson. And then she jumps. But he is also there, because love and family are never that simple and jameson is a tiny bit (read in the level of therapy) of a masochist. And then SHE BLINKS AND LAUGHS AT HIM AND WHEN HE FINALLY MANAGES TO GO AWAY SHE START HAVING HEART PROBLEMS. BUT SHE HAS PLAYED HIM SO MUCH THAT HE DOESNT KNOW WHAT REALITY IS ANYMORE, and she hadnt had any heart problems for the past 4 years. So he leaves and she dies, and hell breakes lose.

He lost a girl he has know his whole life. He just “learned” that his love arent worth more than some points, he just got out of a increadibly toxic relasionship that ruined his life. The healthy thing would have been if he had some safe space to talk about what Emily did to him and have a strong support system. But everyone he knows is muroning her. They see her as an angle, so everything she did to him goes under the traps because how do you even dare to say something about dear angle Emily. And he has to live with the fact that he belives he killed her. And he cant also talk about anyone about that, for obvious reasons (but his grandfather knows and uses that against him).

Remember what I said about him being a masochist? Now is the era of his great self destruction (with an almost suicide attempt there, that his grandfather was present again and used that agaisnt him, *again*). Its all buttom up in him and he feels angry and sad and nothing. And between these 3, he chose anger. Also, Thea blames the Hawthorne for a death they didnt cause because who dares to say something bad about angles emily? So she puts the whole school agaisnt him and makes school unberable to him. Everyone likes to joke about Jameson missing school but has anyone ever wondered why he hated there so much? He didnt skiped class because he was a rebel 😝🤘but because everyone f. hated him and made his life hell.

[starstruckwillows]

♡ z to a - s.b ♡

requested by anon<3, i'm a firm believer james potter lives by the beach

rockstar!sirius black x shy!reader, fem!reader, fluff fic, petnames, might make spin-off blurbs about them, some alcohol, participation in halloween, mention of coke but no drug consumption by canon characters or reader, swearing

emotionally constipated rockstar!sirius tries to confess his feelings for you three times before someone else does it for him

29th august 1978

the marauders had only been out of hogwarts with their n.e.w.ts in tow for a month or so when the production deal came through.

in all honesty, nobody, including them, was really expecting the band to progress past the potters' garage. so to soar to fame after one pub gig, seemingly overnight... it made everyone's head spin.

that's what you put that night down to. excitement. everyone out, drinking and cheering, sirius kissing you as though he'd been waiting for years to do such a thing.

but sirius didn't wait. he was confident, as sure as the tide running towards your group on the beach. you were both drunk and excited, everyone was kissing. you're almost sure you saw regulus kissing someone and he was vehemently against intimacy outside a relationship.

neither of you ever bought it up again, but you couldn't help but wonder sometimes.

the sand filling your clothes the next morning as you all woke was a sobering reality, trudging back to james' house while everyone complained there was still salt water in their hair even more so.

"hey." sirius groaned, jogging up beside you and instantly regretting the movement.

your hair was an untamed mess that you swiped from your eyes to answer him, "hey."

"you gonna come on tour with us, doll?" his voice was light and teasing, and you were about to quip back when mary nudged him roughly, "where's our invite then?"

he threw an arm around her shoulder and laughed, "backstage passes for every show."

marlene thumped him, "knock it off, it's one deal."

the lot of you dissolved into hungover giggles and you knew sirius was only teasing you like he teased everyone.

peter appeared next to you, "would you really come with us if we went on tour?"

thinking of the busy backstage chaos and all the people that would be present, you shrugged.

"as if we'll ever get to tour." remus scoffed.

1st april 1979

the marauders did get to tour.

first, around the uk, both for the muggle and wizarding world. two tours passed like that, with sirius personally sending you tickets to each one. you went to most.

now, they were all set to tour the whole of europe, and their manager was discussing america too. they'd been a sensation, the lot of them, and you were all so proud.

it was lily, your best friend, who suggested you should join them.

"why not? i'm going, it'll give me someone to talk to!"

as an independent reporter, lily's job was as flexible as she wanted it to be. yours was not so simple, but it could be done. it still felt like much too big of a risk.

your hesitation was visible, lightly tugging your arm out of lily's excited grip, "i don't know lils, i can't just invite myself along."

"alright, don't tell him i told you, but sirius is going to ask you to come. would you say yes?"

you hated it, felt pathetic, when the mention of sirius' name had your gut screaming yes.

"i- i guess."

she squealed, and if it wasn't so against your quiet nature you might of squealed with her, her joy was so pure.

so when sirius knocked on the door of your room, only down the corridor from his in the large flat share the band had bought, you knew what he would ask and you knew your answer.

he sat on the end of your bed, relief all over his face at your shy agreement, and took one of your hands in his, tattoos decorating the pale skin.

"also, there's something else i was going to ask you-" his voice was uncharacteristically nervous, each word a struggle.

a screech that you both instantly assigned to james sounded from the communal kitchen, and the two of you leapt up to see what fire had been started.

there was none, just the sparkle of marlene's ring finger, and dorcas' wide smile.

"you're engaged!"

the night became another of celebration and shouting. it's a good thing the lot of you didn't have many neighbours.

sirius was caught once looking at you wistfully, before averting his gaze and making a crude joke about strippers for the hen do.

you smiled ruefully, commanding yourself to calm down. sirius was the frontman and lead singer of a now world famous band. you were a girl he went to school with who also lived where he lived.

breathe, you told yourself, turning politely to remus who was telling you about their new song.

31st october 1981

halloween had never been your favourite holiday, always too nervous to get in any costume that you thought looked good on you. most of your life, you'd been on trick or treat duty.

the new joint penthouse, consisting of remus, sirius, peter (publicly known as three thirds of the hit band, the marauders), marlene and dorcas (still engaged but getting married next year), and regulus, who didn't technically live there anymore but was around enough. but there were no kids to approach the door with pumpkin baskets in hand, and therefore no duty for you with your bag of sweets.

mary had moved out with her partner earlier that year, and it was at her house she convinced you into a costume you knew you looked gorgeous in, but couldn't bring yourself to arrive back home in.

the party would be in full swing by now, full of rockstars and actors and models and probably the odd politician crashing the place. remus usually chased them out.

"lily told me you have to wear it." mary flicked you on the head.

"why?" you asked, whinier than intended.

she pointed to the group photo, showcasing baby harry in the centre, "because her and james are occupied, and she's not here to bully you into it."

with a reluctant grumble of 'fine', you grabbed your car keys, mary and her partner climbing into the backseat, all giggles and confidence, while you avoided checking yourself in the mirror every three seconds out of nerves.

everyone you entered the party with dissipated quickly, leaving you rubbing your arm nervously.

"hello!" a man approached you, tipsy but not drunk. you vaguely recognized him as the guitarist of the marauders' go to opening act.

you'd been on their europe tour with them twice, but not their most recent american one. it was hard to remember individuals from the many faces you saw in that time.

clearing your throat, you offered an increasingly nervous, "hi..."

"you were on tour! what-" he hiccuped, "why were you there again?"

you shrugged tightly, "i helped in the costume, hair and makeup department. but sirius asked me to come."

the man's eyes bulged out of his head, "man, so you're like a travel groupie! can't wait to get myself one of them."

you coughed awkwardly, trying to edge away, "oh- no, it's not like that."

"you're like viv or whatever her name was!"

the man seemed excited at the link, you wanted to hurl. vie was a girl peter had fallen for, but turned out to be someone just climbing the social ladder and using his head as a stepping stone, as well as leaking information about james and lily's new house, and remus' "health condition" that she, a muggle, didn't know was lycanthropy.

you hated to see your friend so heartbroken, while she headlined hollywood's major films that year.

"i'm not vie, and i'm not a groupie." you said, firmer than was usual for you.

sirius chose that convenient moment to appear, eyes trailing over your skin with an involuntary smile before a frown took over his beautiful face as he saw the man you were engaged in conversation with.

he clapped the guy on the shoulder with more force than necessary, "everything alright, kade?"

kade nodded and scurried off, mumbling something about spotting his coke dealer. that was a guy in way over his head, you thought.

"you look brilliant, doll. he didn't ruin your mood, did he?"

you shook your head, not quite making eye contact, the gloss on your lips stretching into a smile.

sirius wasn't convinced, gently holding your arm, "look at me, please."

the undertone of the plead in his voice made you do as he said, resisting the urge to pull at your sleeves.

"what did he say?" sirius' voice was unusually low and slightly rough as he balanced the line between not shouting but making sure you could hear him over the music.

you tried not to shrug again, conscious of the heat of his hand around your wrist, "oh, he just thought i was a travel groupie or something."

there was a cool anger present in sirius' eyes, but it left when he focused on your face, finger trailing across the arch of your cheek, "you know you're much more than a groupie, love."

usually you would have retorted something about how you couldn't be a groupie when you saw him at his lowest twelve year old moments, but instead you plucked some confidence from somewhere deep within you to ask, "yeah? what am i, then?"

he tossed his head back to the ceiling, pale throat with a tattoo creeping up one side exposed to the air in front of you, slightly long raven hair falling back. the half groan, half laugh he gave you was enough to make your stomach flutter.

except the answer he had on his tongue was stolen by the rare sight of an angry remus. a burning rage as he spat foul curses at the bombshell beauty that was vie.

sirius' whole face was set in a furious grimace. he let go of your arm, retracting the warmth and jogging over. you trailed awkwardly behind, apparently catching vie's eye as she swivelled to you, screaming and sobbing.

"she's no better! you let her in here, she's just as shallow as i am!" the young woman cried with more dramatics than ever. peter looked struck with dazed fear on the sidelines, a lipstick mark on his neck that he was trying to rub off.

you felt the same, shock seeping into your system. you'd been nothing but nice to vie, ever. you were the last to believe how she'd betrayed you all.

she was shouting at marlene now, who shouted back with just as much vigor until the two dissolved into a scrap and the actress was escorted out.

the party continued with ease, as it always did when famous people fought. everyone was too drunk, high or both to care.

as unsettling as it was, it wasn't the most dramatic thing to occur since the marauders' sudden stardom. you could think of twenty more shocking examples from the last tour alone.

right now, you just wanted to find sirius again. wanted to find your answer to that question.

he was buy the drinks table, downing another shot and about to fall over the line of tipsy to fully intoxicated.

"hey, sirius..."

he almost collapsed into you, "i'm sorry."

the slur in his words was evident as you patted his hair, "it's alright, darling, why don't we go sit down?"

"sure."

when the two of you were seated uncomfortably close on the sofa, his feet on the glass coffee table and head lolling against the sofa material, you brought up your question again, cup of something in hand.

"what am i here, sirius?"

a more sober demeanor overtook him, and he hesitated in the way drunk people rarely did, "my best friend, of course."

you smiled and nodded, as you usually did, satisfied with the answer but a small pang in your chest knowing you wanted more than that.

"of course."

1st november 1981

you woke groggily, not quite hungover but not quite alert either, releasing you were still half folded across sirius.

heat in your face, you scrambled off of him. james sat at the kitchen island with about eight coffees in front of him, adorning the bright smile of someone who'd had a good nights sleep.

"harry go to bed well last night?"

eagerly, as though nobody had asked yet, which you supposed they hadn't, "yeah! didn't even wake up once. absolute champ."

tiredly, you reached for a coffee, "when did you get here?"

"about twenty minutes ago. remus was already up, he herded everyone out. 'cept regulus, he's asleep somewhere."

"ah well, he basically lives here anyway."

"can't find pete though, remus has gone out to look now."

everyone was up and dressed with eyes bulging from their heads as they stared at the news headlines, only ten minutes later.

remus burst into the apartment, storming over to the tv, "fuckin' found peter."

the reporter behind the screen showed an image of the marauders' latest album cover as he spoke, "you heard it here first folks, an exclusive interview last night with peter pettigrew and his girlfriend, vie dalton, reveals his decision to leave the band, and provides some juicy inside information on why that is."

it became a day filled with pr meetings and phone calls, hasty damage control, and fending off reporters outside the building.

you were caught in a throng of them on your way to the shops. you'd only gone out for tea bags, because remus looked like he was going to blow another fuse when he discovered a lack of them in the cupboard.

microphones were shoved in your face, "who are you to the marauders?"

"who are to sirius black? how do you feel about his playboy lifestyle?" nice, thanks peter. last time i tell you about a crush.

"how did you get to live with the band?"

breathe.

"are you part of the crew?"

breathe, just breathe, walk, and get to your car.

"do you know who remus lupin is seeing?"

i can't breathe.

"has james potter cheated on his wife?"

i can't breathe.

"can we get a statement for the daily prophet?"

an arm around your waist appeared, pulling you away from the people suddenly, catching you as you stumbled backwards.

it was sirius, you could smell his colonge, and his slightly hoarse voice rang in your ears as he offered the mob a harsh set of curse words.

safely back in the elevator, you slammed yourself into the corner against the cold metal.

"i've got- got to get teabags... for remus."

you could barely see sirius through the blur of impending tears as he wrapped you into him, "forget the tea, remus will manage."

you knew he'd punched the emergency stop button because the lift wasn't moving. you couldn't feel it rise beneath you as you slid to the ground, still clinging onto sirius as he went down with you.

once your lungs worked on their own, you moved hair from your eyes and laughed. sirius, looking at you in total confusion, felt your head for a temperature.

"i'm alright," you all but whispered, "thank you."

he gave you a half smile, not as cocky as a smirk, but more than something friendly, "of course."

you didn't want to move from his embrace, so you didn't, letting your head fall against his shoulder, leather jacket smooth against your face.

"you've always been there, y'know?" he said suddenly.

"hm?"

sirius played with the hem of your shirt in an almost nervous manner, "you've always stayed with us. with me. from z listers to a. sometimes i think i don't deserve that much."

you wanted to scream at him, telling him just how much he deserved, telling him you wish he'd just let his guard down for two seconds so you could love him.

you didn't.

"of course you deserve it, siri, i wouldn't have stuck around so long if you didn't."

"cos we're best friends?"

"sure."

he unwound himself from your side, twisting to face you, "have you heard everything peter said?"

you nodded.

"the stuff about us?" sirius prompted further.

you tensed, froze, then nodded.

"so you know how i feel? that the pick you signed for my birthday is the only one i use? you know i spent four hours shopping for your christmas present because it had to be perfect? that i'm the one who leaves a coffee outside your door every morning? you know that i'm in love with you?"

the words rang free in the elevator, and your eyebrows furrowed slightly as you looked up at him. he looked terrified. you hadn't seen him this scared since he left home, you didn't want him to be this scared ever again.

words failed you. they always did, you weren't good at talking, you weren't good at making bold statements without over analyzing them.

you did the only thing you could think of to do, following your gut, and leaning forward to kiss him, hands around the back of his neck and in his hair, slow enough to give him time to back away.

but he didn't, pulling you closer alarmingly quickly, lips colliding in a way that should've been awkward, but wasn't. the two of you seemed to just fit against each other like magnets slotting together after being held apart.

"sirius-" you tried to move away to talk, but he just emitted a low whine and pulled you back in.

you didn't have any motivation to break away again. he seemed more important to you than breathing; he definitely felt better.

eventually the emergency stop button was hit again and the two of you returned to your apartment, looking like two grinning fools in love. everyone was too preoccupied to notice anything different. maybe nothing was all that different.

you spent the rest of the day in his bed.

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