#also never fear i am in fact doing a part 3 haha

[crossfandomslut]

At Peace in Your Fire pt. 3

part 1 and part 2

Summary: Hewn City bs and lots of Eris screen time haha

Pairing: ErisxArcheron!reader

Word Count: 4k

Notes: I am so so excited that people are liking this story so far !!! I love all your comments and am so appreciative of the likes and reblogs ! For this chapter, I did use a big chunk of the direct dialog from ACOWAR for the Hewn City meeting with Eris, because I think its important context and I wasn't about to rewrite SJM's mastery. So disclaimer, I do not own any of SJM's characters or speak for her or them in anyway ! This is just for shits and gigs and I hope y'all enjoy this chapter ! Also please let me know how we feel about the Eris POV :)

Amber eyes and a pale face littered in freckles, framed by fiery red hair,  stared wildly at her. Eyes full of fear and confusion contorted his beautiful features. He was stunning, truly. Rakish, almost lanky, but toned muscles rippled under his well-fitted clothes as he fell to the ground gripping and clawing at his throat, trying to force air back into his lungs. Y/n did that to him. She made another being feel that pain and suffering. But he was hurting her sister. He was hurting Feyre. Y/n didn’t know why she had to remind herself of that fact so often to justify her actions that day on the frozen lake, but she had fallen asleep thinking about the male every night since.

Now that Feyre was home, things started moving pretty quickly. Hybern was making moves in the Spring Court to bring down the wall to the human lands, and thus putting Prythian on the brink of another war. Everyone was hard at work planning, coordinating, and scheming, but Y/n was told to just keep training. She wanted to be useful when the time came, so she was going to need to hone her powers and her physical abilities. She finally got to be a part of the plans when Rhys announced at family dinner that everyone would be taking a trip to Hewn City.

Y/n wasn’t afraid per-say, but she wasn’t sure what to expect. Feyre had told her that Amarantha’s ‘lair’ for lack of a better term, was designed after the city. She wasn’t sure she wanted to see that firsthand after hearing about everything that Feyre and Rhys went through. She was going to put on a brave face though. It’s not about her. It was about helping this court, her new family, and potentially the fate of the world as they knew it.

She studied herself in the mirror after selecting the right dress. Rhys had told her to wear whatever color she wanted, but she knew that this visit to Hewn City was all about appearances and she needed to help show that they were a united front. She had never been fond of black. It always looked so good on her twin, but Y/n preferred softer, neutral tones that helped her blend into the trees and underbrush. Tonight however, she would step out of her comfort zone. Adapt. Her constant mantra. So, she studied herself in the mirror, eyes gliding along her body that was no longer too thin, but now tones and showing real muscle. Her hips were wider, her arms and thighs thicker. A body to fill out such a fine dress. It was a floor length gown, as black as obsidian. It had see-through long sleeves and a modest neckline. Nothing flashy, she didn’t need to draw attention to herself, she just needed to blend in and help silently from the dais. But as she looked at herself, she thought that she looked quite pretty. She always thought she was the most plain of her sister, even now as Fae, but tonight, Y/n would try to wear this dress with confidence and that casual coolness that came so naturally to all the others.

 Eris’ POV

 That beautiful female on the frozen lake haunted him every waking and sleeping hour of Eris’ life. The way she literally took his breath away. If it weren’t for her power actually stealing the air from his lungs, her beauty alone would have stopped him in his tracks. She was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen in his many centuries of existence. He could help but laugh when she stormed up to him in the Winter Court wearing little more than pajamas. He shouldn’t have laughed. If the Illyrians thought she was important enough to bring along, he shouldn’t have underestimated her. He saw her face every time he closed his eyes. Her y/e/c orbs staring straight into his soul. It ratted him, which not much did anymore.

Eris hated Hewn City and he hated Keir. He was so tired of playing these court games and scheming behind the scenes. He knew Rhys liked to make an entrance, but he was growing bored and restless. Until he saw her. She was just as beautiful as the first time he saw her, but now, dressed in a night court black gown, she didn’t glow like she did when she was comfortable in her chestnut brown pants and a forest green sweater. Who is she?

Y/n’s POV

Stood atop the dais behind the single throne that Feyre and Rhys shared, Y/n scanned the room. Doing her best to keep her face carefully neutral, she stood there while Rhys addressed the court introduced Feyre as their High Lady, and coolly demanded that they kneel. After a long pause, the whole room on their knees before them, he released them to enjoy the festivities.

A man with blonde hair, that Y/n identified as Keir, Mor’s father only by blood, approached the dais. Then, the last person she expected to see approached as well. The male from the lake, with the glowing amber eyes and hair that reminded her of a maple trees falling red leaves. She swore her heart stopped beating when he made eye contact with her as he bowed. Not to Rhys or Feyre, but to her.

“Keir. Eris. So kind of you to join us. But don’t be so eager to get our meeting over with, go enjoy the evening. Azriel’s shadows will find you when we’re ready.” Rhys slid his bored gaze over each male and waved a hand in dismissal.

Eris. That was his name. Eris Eris Eris. The name clanged around her brain, and she had to choke back the desire to know how it felt on her tongue. She knew his name now and it made falling asleep to picturing his face feel like she was violating him in some way. She knew she shouldn’t have been thinking about him in the first place. He tried to kill her sister, or bring her back to his father who was a known tyrant and took brutality to another level. She should definitely not be thinking about him. But there he was. And gods damn he was even more devastating than she remembered. For starters, he wasn’t covered in blood, and she wasn’t choking the daylights out of him. But more than that, he had this air about him. He exuded a confidence that was purely Fae male and came from centuries of a life lived. Then she remembered the way that fire had danced from his fingertips. He could wield flame like an extension of his own body. It was beautiful. Y/n once again had to reprimand herself, because those same beautiful flames coming from his long, calloused fingers, were causing harm and pain to her own sister. That light and radiance that fire had was diminished in the context of it’s use. How dare he make Y/n fear something she loved so dearly? How dare her use fire, which is the root of all life, use it to hurt and destroy?

Y/n was snapped out of her daydreaming by the sound of someone clearing their throat. She realized Eris had not broken eye contact with her and was now starring at her expectantly. With no small amount of embarrassment, she realized she was probably just standing here gazing into his eyes while her whole family stood there and watched. He cheeks heated and Eris’ smirk grew.

“I asked you for a dance, lady…?”

“Y/n, you do not have to dance with him. Honestly, you don’t even have to talk to him.” Rhys said.

“Y/n...” She hated how much she liked her name falling from his lips. “Just once dance, Lady Y/n, and I’ll share what I know of the Spring Court in our meeting this evening.” Still smirking, he held out a hand.

“Fine.” Y/n unceremoniously slapped her hand into his. Just because she was practically vibrating with anticipation of being so close to the male, didn’t mean he needed to know that. And neither did her family. For all anyone else knew, she hated Eris as much as they all did. She certainly should if she knew what was good for her. Gods, what was wrong with her!?

That smirk turned into a cocky grin as Eris led Y/n to the dance floor. He tugged on her hand still held in his and pulled her close to his body. Not pressing against her, but close enough that she could feel the heat coming off his body. He was unnaturally hot being a fire wielder, but Y/n never minded the heat. Even found herself having to hold back from pressing every inch of her against the warmth. He stood close to a foot taller than her, and she had to tilt her head up to lock eyes with him. She was met with amber eyes dancing with amusement, and he was met with a cold hard glare.

Eris blew out a soft laugh and asked, “why, little dove, do you hate me so much? We don’t even know each other yet.”

Y/n tried not to linger on the ‘yet’ as she leveled him an incredulous glare. “You mean aside from the fact that you chased my sister across a frozen lake, blasting fire at her and then restrained her with said fire?”

He had the audacity to laugh again. “Yes, Y/n, aside from that. I would very much like to know you. You hating me makes that slightly difficult.”

Gods that smirk. Y/n was trying to think straight as he floated her around the dance floor like it was nothing. She hoped he didn’t realize she was using her magic to keep herself from tripping over her own feet or stepping on his. He was such a beautiful dancer. And the truth was, she wanted to know him too. But instead she said, “you use your gift of fire to hurt others. You use that delicate flame to inflict pain and fear.” She desperately hoped her voice was staying steady, but then he scoffed at her and the leash she had on her temper slipped from her fingers. She feels her voice raising and her cheeks heating as she goes on. “Fire is not meant to cause pain, Eris!”

He halts their movement. That was enough to make her blink and remember where they were. Her eyes and her voice soften as she tries to look straight into his soul and speak directly to it. Her hands drift to hold both of his in her much smaller ones. “Fire is beautiful and lovely and soft and warm. Fire is nurturing and breathes life into everything. Fire is a gentle protector and a kind companion. I am so sorry someone told you otherwise and that you’ve been told to use it as a weapon.” He just blinked at her for what felt like an eternity. Suddenly the music stops, and the room erupts into applause for the musicians. “Eris…?” Y/n sys his name as gently as she can, but he pulled away from her so fast and muttered an ‘excuse me’ before he turned on his heels and practically ran out of the ball room.

Y/n stands there until someone accidently bumps into her and jolts her out of her head and back into her body. Slowly, she makes her way back to the dais staring at her feet, still not totally present. She looks up when she reaches her family only to see them all with a hand over their mouth to choke back a laugh. “What?” Y/n’s brow scrunches and she tilts her head in confusion.

Cassian is the first to break, laughing so loud a few partygoers jump and glasses shatter. The next is Mor, and finally, Feyre asks through tears in her eyes and a barely concealed giggle, “What the hell did you say to him!?”

Y/n just took her spot on the dais next to Feyre and Rhys as they laughed and laughed together and resumed staring at the floor trying not to be eager to see Eris at the meeting later this evening.

Eris’ POV

He had to get out of there. Had to get out of that room that felt too similar to under the mountain and away from that female who was far too gentle and kind to be anywhere near him. ‘The Mother must really hate me’ he thinks as he reaches the city’s edge and can finally breathe again. He knew the shadowsinger would find him soon and call for the meeting, but before then he needed to regain his composure. Y/n didn’t need to use her power to stop his breathing and make his heart race.

He took a few deep breaths and the shaking in his hands and the ache in his chest eased slightly. His mind drifted to the feeling of her in his arms, how well they danced across the floor together and how lovely her hands felt pressed to his chest. ‘Fire is not meant to cause pain’ Y/n had said. The words had come from her mouth with such passion and determination that he almost believed her. He wanted to. Gods did he want to believe her and her kind words and her cold calloused hands that soothed his burning skin. There was no way for Y/n to have known his father had struck him across the chest just this morning. A show of power after his father bested him during sparring. The punishment for winning would have been far more gruesome. Y/n’s cold unassuming hand placed directly over where his father’s had left the flesh raw and painful. Her lovely hand placed there while she looked him in the eyes and told him that fire wasn’t meant to cause pain and that she was sorry. He couldn’t believe she was real, and his need to know her just grew tenfold. But he wasn’t good enough for her. He wasn’t good. He should keep his distance and save her the misery of his company again.

Eris was dreading the mask he would dawn in this meeting and the monster she would think of him as afterward. A shadow wrapped around his wrist and tugged. It was time. Eris schooled his features into the calm, bored, arrogant heir, winnowed back into the halls of the palace, and sauntered his way into the meeting.

Y/n’s POV

The meeting was nothing of what Y/n expected. Eris came in, and straight up avoided eye contact with her. She couldn’t lie, that stung a bit.

He sat across from Rhys, but looked to Mor with a knowing glint in his eye and said, “you look well, Mor.”

“You don’t speak to her,” Azriel said softly.

Eris gave a bitter smile. “I see you’re still holding a grudge.”

Y/n was so confused.

“This arrangement, Eris,” Rhys spoke, “relies solely upon you keeping your mouth shut.”

Eris huffed a laugh. “And haven’t I done an excellent job? Not even my father suspected when I left tonight.”

Feyre glanced between her mate and Eris. “How did this come about?”

Apparently, Feyre was just as lost as you were.

Eris explains that he caught Azriel’s shadows snooping around the Autumn court after they returned from the frozen lake, and that his brothers ‘mysteriously’ forgot about Feyre’s powers. He said that he had taught himself a few things about daemati powers and how to block them out. He says that he didn’t tell his father because he knew that Baron would want to hunt Feyre down and kill her for his belief that she stole part of his power. He doesn’t believe that Baron knows just how much of a threat Hybern is, but that he wont join forces with them if he finds out about Feyre’s powers.

“So what’s the asking price for you silence then, Eris?” Mor demanded. “Another little bride for you to torture?”

All the blood drained from Y/n’s face as her eyes darted between Mor and Eris. Her head hurt from trying to put this puzzle together without having all the pieces. She knew that Mor’s father had tried to marry her off and Mor took control of her own fate by sleeping with Cassian, but she hadn’t known the male she was sold off to was supposed to be Eris. The pounding in her head did not cease.

Something flickered in Eris’ eyes. “I don’t know who fed you those lies to begin with, Morrigan,” he said with vicious calm. “Likely the bastards you surround yourself with.”

A sneer from Azriel. And a sharp intake of breath from Y/n. If he had looked at her she would have seen the brief flash of guilt in his eyes.

Mor snarled, rattling the glasses. “You never gave any evidence to the contrary. Certainly not when you left me in those woods.”

“There were forces at work that you have never considered,” Eris said coldly. “And I am not going to waste my breath explaining them to you. Believe what you want about me.”

“You hunted me like an animal,” Feyre cut in. “I think we will choose to believe the worst.”

Y/n didn’t know how to feel. Couldn’t think of anything to say or do, so she just dropped her gaze to the floor. She shouldn’t come to Eris’ defense. She just met the male and apparently her gut feeling about him was wrong. Her family hated him and he hurt Mor. Something didn’t feel right, but what would she even say? There were literal centuries of bad blood between her found family and this male who for some gods forsaken reason, she couldn’t stop thinking about. This arrogant, spiteful, male who attacked her sister! Not just Feyre it seems, but Mor as well. Even if he didn’t have direct hand in harming her, he didn’t help her. Why didn’t he help her? Her head was still spinning trying to sort through all these conflicting feelings. She felt like she needed to come to Eris’ defense, but why? Maybe because she felt deep down in her soul that no one ever had. She could feel that he was good, so why were his actions such the opposite? The pounding in her head wouldn’t stop and she felt as if she might faint. The conversation starting to sound like they were underwater.

“I was given and order. And sent to do it with two of my…brothers.”

“And what of the brother you hunted down alongside me? The one whose lover you helped to execute before his eyes?” Feyre accused.

Eris slammed a hand on the table, which did nothing to help Y/n headache. No one seemed to notice her flinch and start to sway. “You know nothing about what happened that day. Nothing.”

“Indulge me,” was all Feyre said in response.

“How do you think he made it to the Spring border,” Eris’ voice had returned to its normal low and sharp nature. “I wasn’t there- when they did it. Ask him. I refused. It was the firs and only time I have denied my father anything. He punished me. And by the time I got free… They were going to kill him too. I made sure they didn’t. Made sure Tamlin got word- anonymously- to get the hell over to his own border.” Eris picked at a stray thread on his jacket, “not all of us were as lucky in our friends and family as you, Rhysand.”

Sharp, stabbing, shooting pain ran through Y/n’s head and it was so surprising that she let out a yelp as she dropped to the floor, and everything went black. The last thing she remembered hearing was the voice of Eris’ panicked voice crying her name.

Taglist: @abysshaven @myromanempiree @lilah-asteria @96jnie @ivy-34 @minaethrym

[ragnarokhound]

Hi wife! Thinking about you. Should we buy a hot tub? Or a sauna? Or both?

Also thinking about the werewolf fic. I would be delighted if there was full werewolf smut in the werewolf fic👀👀 When will my wife (you) return from the war (writing the werewolf fic)?

Also thinking about the hilarity of tim hearing jason talk about his “time of the month” and ofc assuming it’s about Jason being trans when jason is talking about wolfing out. Picture:

Tim: “-and I brought chocolate-“

Jason: “Are you trying to kill me? canines can’t have chocolate!”

after some confusion they clarify things (jason is trans, not a big deal, he’s a werewolf, also not a big deal). Then (important for plot and character development) they have dirty dirty werewolf sex :)

Hehehe hello darling, you are always near my thoughts <3 And ohhh I could use a dip in a hot tub, especially now that winter has come to my climes >.< Though I fear a sauna would never see its use with me, haha

I am ALSO thinking about werewolf fic. Nigh constantly these days. I am deep in the trenches. I am furiously pondering how to reconcile the idea I had sketched most of the bones of almost an entire year ago with what I think and like now. It's been a bit of a battle. One I am fighting... tooth and claw you might say ∠( ᐛ 」∠)＿ (badum tsh)

Alas, while I don't want to give too much away, I feel I must warn you that the kind of werewolf Jason is in werewolf fic is more in line with 'that's just a wild animal' and less 'monsterfucker furry.' So while we'll see some very animalistic behaviors from Jason (what with the scenting and the licking and the biting and the growling etc) and some occasional signs that he's on the verge of wolfing out, there is no actual wolfed out smut lmao OTL. Please enjoy a small sneak peek of what I kind of sort of mean at the bottom of this post <3

For actual werewolf smut you'll want to look forward to the timestamp/smutty sequel I fully intend to write for my vamp!Tim and werewolf!Jay fic, in which he is absolutely the monsterfucker furry kind of werewolf and Tim takes gleeful advantage of that fact lololol (but werewolf fic comes first...! It Is Time. I Will Not Be Distracted.)

And omg yes. I do very much love the trans 🤝 werewolf overlap and metaphors, it's one of my favorite things fr fr (you got me thinking about trans lesbians jaytim now--)

I LOVE assuming there's a mundane explanation for a supernatural secret, that's my JAM (Do know that our early correspondences live rent free in my WIP document and that I would eventually also like to write the goofy sitcom-esque romcom in which Jason isn't quite hiding his lycanthropy from Tim - but Tim's not really clocking it either lmfao)

--and it must be said that dirty dirty werewolf sex will always be VITAL to both plot and character development <33 (it certainly is to werewolf fic, even if the werewolf part of that sex is mostly in the vibes lolol)

Anyway, here's wonderwall a sneak peek leading up to some of the smut in werewolf fic:

Jason snaps his teeth sharply, inches from Tim’s throat. It's not an empty gesture, and Tim wildly thinks through his options, squeezing tight with his knees around Jason’s thick waist so he can’t buck Tim off immediately. Jason is too strong and Tim is too light; he can’t stay here forever. Jason writhes underneath him, looking for leverage. With his shoulders trapped under Tim’s staff, Jason plants his feet and surges his hips in a powerful, cresting motion. Tim sinks back on his haunches to keep him down, then forward again when he threatens to break free. In Jason’s struggle, he rocks up just as Tim rocks down— and they inadvertently grind together. Tim's stomach curls and tangles in an electric jolt of heat at the glancing friction. He realizes with a spike of hot, mortified shame that he's— Tim is hard under his uniform. He sucks in a short gasp, trying to hide it, and Jason— —whines.

[science-lings]

Extra details bc polls have a character limit and I am a certified yapper

1- Naturally quiet Bruce my beloved, selectively mute even. He knows he's bad at words and if he doesn't know what to say he just doesn't say anything at all and that is not good for being a decent communicator. Thankfully Cass doesn't need words to know, so they just hang out without saying a single thing.

2- Brucie is who he is when he HAS to interact with people and HAS to come off as 'normal' and it has never been who he really is. Also, this guy fixates on strategizing and some of the most random things with the excuse that it could be useful at some point, he has trouble in social and emotional situations. Yes, Battinson opened my eyes to this concept and I am not letting it go.

3-As much as I like the masks having glowing white lenses, I need them to put makeup on each other for crime-fighting reasons. Battinsons raccoon eyes are so important to me. I want to see him carefully putting some green eye makeup on a hyperactive 9 yo Dick Grayson RIGHT NOW

4-Titus and Ace have gone through therapy dog training (specifically for PTSD) and the rest are only qualified because they make Damian feel better, they don't actually get much special treatment. He just likes introducing people to his emotional support cow/turkey/bat-dragon-demon creature/ Alfred (cat).

5- I think canonically he can cook and the joke is that haha he needs Alfred to do everything for him but like this guy went alone off the grid for years and can in fact take care of himself or at least his basic health needs. The thing is that when he cooks he gets distracted while things are cooking and forgets to put on timers. He just puts food low on the scale of things that are important to pay attention to so if anything comes up to take his attention he's screwed. He works better if he's part of a group of people cooking or there's someone there to tell him to pay attention.

6- I think while the Waynes were alive, Alfred was mostly pretty distant, he was part of the staff even if he was one of their favorites. He wasn't Bruce's nanny or anything. But he was trusted by them and they didn't trust any other family to take care of Bruce in the event of their death. Even after the Incident, Alfred wasn't really prepared to raise a child, I feel like we always make Alfred the emotionally intelligent one when he mostly raised Bruce post-horrific trauma. I don't think Alfred is perfect, I think there was always that barrier keeping him and Bruce from really connecting during his childhood.

Bruce saw everyone leave, his parents, the rest of the staff, and he is convinced that one wrong move means that Alfred will leave him too so he doesn't want to do something wrong and drive his last person away. Even though he is a traumatized child filled with rage, every time it becomes too much and he gets into a fight or breaks something he is terrified that means Alfred will find someone else to take care of him. Slowly this fear fades but it comes back when he turns 18 bc that's when he becomes an adult which means Alfred won't be obligated to stick around. But it comes and goes and Alfred is... still there? It's only at this point that he starts to think of Alfred as part of his family and over the years he actually allows himself to think of Alfred as his father.

7- I don't think I have to explain this one, I think he has a weird relationship with sex and will seduce people for the Mission but has never been particularly into it. Sometimes he does it because that's what his partners want but if no one asks for it or there's no outside reason to do it, he has better things to do. Maybe he's even uncomfortable with it but can do it to keep up pretenses and because that's what Brucie would do.

8- I think the big scary vampire-coded vigilante should take off his big scary cape and wrap it around his kids and carry them off into the night. It's good for people going into shock as well. I think it is secretly very warm. It is also a good hiding place for robins of a certain size. Full-grown Jason would have trouble hiding there but its blanket use is still fully applicable.

9-We typically only see the big cavern with all the vehicles and the batcomputer but I think it would be fun if that was just the Hub of the cave system. There are tunnels that lead to labs and rooms made for the creation and upkeep of armor and other vigilante wear, there are quarantine rooms and containment vaults, target ranges and a surgery center and so much more. It is a labyrinth in there and there is always a new section being worked on. There is also a tunnel that leads to the Drake residence which made it especially easy for Tim to sneak home when he needed to.

10- how is this 40(?) yo man doing the splits while fighting, he does flips, how is he moving like that. He's not just a big strong guy, he's also fast and evasive and I like to think that aside from the lack of quips, he did a pretty good job convincing ppl he was Nightwing that one time.

[changbinsboiledegg]

PLEASE I loved your bsf skz reactions and now I want to request head canons for skz as your internet friends? - 👽

F is for friends these days, it seems. Also, I'm so happy you loved them! ILYT. 💜💜💜🫶🫶🫶

Warnings: Swearing.

Note: I liked coming up with these head canons, I hope you guys enjoy them as much as I did! :)

♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎

Chan

Where you met? Anywhere. He’s probably had you as a mutual for months prior. How do you know he’s not your moot now? Eh?

Now, he says he’s always watching, but baby so am I. That doesn’t scare me.

Okay, seriously. I see him as the type that frequently checks up on you. Just wants to hear from you and about you. Whether you’re happy or sad— Especially when you’re sad, he seems like the type to listen and offer advice, so that’s nice.

Probably doesn’t text much but y’all know why. Man’s in the studio.

The type to send good morning/night texts. Chan strikes me as the person to text you at the ass crack of dawn with a “Good morning! :D” and whole time you’re passed out like a non-idol human would be. (joking. anyone can be awake at ungodly hours)

Probably sends out-of-pocket posts stays make because some of y’all have no fears. Be real, he probably already does this in the gc. If not him, then I’m betting at least Felix.

“Why are they like this?”

“Ask.”

“You ask. You're not the famous one.”

Makes sure you’re watching his lives when he does them because If you aren’t watching his lives, you’re getting tossed.

Kidding. But it would make him feel happy that you joined despite the time zone differences depending on where you are in the world, it could be the middle of the night, too early in the morning, or within the same time zone. If you aren’t watching, you better get the footnotes or something, otherwise you’ll get a message, “I see you have other friends to watch.”

Obviously as a joke, I don’t see him as the type to force people to watch him, I mean the dude barely posts, but this is a head-canon so I do sense joking/teasing if you miss a live.

Lee Know

Where you met? Fuck if I know… jk lmao, probably the Pinterest comment section. I Just feel like that’s very Minho… I won’t be elaborating further.

He would send hella pictures… Of his cats.

And of himself, but with the filters he does because I find them endearing and y/n head canon, you’re his hype person.

Remember when he blocked a stay on bubble for getting his cats name wrong?

Yeah. Tread carefully. Learn their names if you haven’t already. He probably won’t block you in this case because you’re his friend, but expect to be left on read for a while.

Fr though, if you don’t like cats, then this head-canon isn’t for you. In fact, riddle me this: How ARE you in this hypothetical situation where you are internet friends with Minho???

I see cat memes in your future. Me personally, I am a dog person. HOWEVER, I like cats too. And I see cat memes and videos because of my cat loving friends. So, if I were Minho’s friend, I would send every cat related post I see. As should you, in this situation.

Obviously, he would do the same too.

I also feel like he’s the type to send a video of something you would be envious of and caption it with, “bet you wish that were you HAHA.”

I once had a dream Minho kept asking what the names of certain songs were, so I’m rolling with it. The man would use you as a human shazam. Hope you can guess the song by the first second. <3

OH imagine spilling tea with Minho. He would be all here for the drama you have to offer, granted that it doesn’t involve him at least.

And of course, not in a way to get himself involved in other people’s drama but everyone who sits similarly to Minho has loved hearing some piping hot tea.

I will not elaborate further on why by the way. All I’m saying is, anyone I’ve met who has the same sitting mannerism as Minho has never passed up the opportunity to hear some tea.

Changbin

Where you met? Part of me wants to say Instagram. And part of me wants to say twitter. Take your pick.

(My fault, ‘X’ 🤪😒)

Listen,,, basing this on bubble, this mf used to spam my shit. Whether it was about his work out or what he ate or just random photos/ voice messages. He. spammed. my. SHIT.

He spams!!!!

Also, y’all saw how fast he answered TXT’s Yeonjun’s call?

Yeah. I see him as a ‘call me’ type of dude. Lmao. I think he prefers calls because he likes to hear your voice and it makes him feel more connected to you.

I feel like he would also listen to your problems. Make sure you’re okay, eating well, especially if you were having a bad day/night/etc. Like Chan.

And if y’all are his friend, you better do the same or you’ll get thrown. (by me &lt;3)

Come on y’all are breaking my heart, y’all know he doesn’t like doing anything alone, he likes being around someone or talking to someone and you’d be the first person he’d talk to when he’s particularly excited or intrigued about something.

He’ll always wanna chat with you or even stay up with you on a call because you or he couldn’t sleep and I’m not saying this because I’m biased, STOP. I’m gonna get out of here before I cry.

Chan, if you see this, since you’re ‘always watching’, tell Changbin to reject me already. Like actually cause I’m down astronomically bad for this man.

Hyunjin

Hyunjinnnnnnn sweetie, you’re up.

A whole sweetheart.

Where y’all met? Instagram. Hands down. Fight me, bite me, whatever. I stand by this.

He’d send pictures of his art before he posts because he wants to show you. :,)

He would be fun to talk to. Like if you say something funny or send something funny, I bet he would smile at his phone and earn suspicious looks from the others or be teased.

Hyunjin strikes me as the type of friend that would send you links or screenshots when you have a question or when you need help with something neither of you have the knowledge of.

Or if you list your symptoms when you’re not feeling well? The sweetie plugs them into google.

Turns out you’ve been dead for the past five years.

Similar to Minho, expect random pictures of Kkami. On topic, off topic, before you wake up, when you wake up, or when you’re sad.

And any pictures you send to him, whether it’s of yourself, the scenery, your own pets— I’m positive he’d love to see the world through your eyes. <3

Lmao I remember this one dream I had where Hyunjin kept taking photos of me so they could be used on a wanted poster for the authorities to find me easier.

…

Point of that was, I think he would take hella candid's of you if/when y’all meet up one day. And trust me, that day is about to be the most fun day you’ll have.

Prepare to explore, try new things… Or do the same things but together. Your pick.

Han

Where you met? Online video game OR YouTube comment section. Fight me, bite me, whatever part 2, I stand by my head canons unless you present me with a VERY good argument.

In the most RESPECTFUL way possible, I feel like he leaves you on delivered for days on end… Accidentally ofc. It’s an introvert thing.

Another introvert thing, he’s probably not into calls. However, when y’all call, I bet it would be hella fun. If you’re a gamer? Y’all bet it’s all comms in whatever multiplayer video game you decide to play.

Even if you aren’t a gamer, you are now. Unless you want to meet him in the comment section of a random YouTube video.

This is slowly turning into a gamer boy head canon but dude, I feel like he’s pretty quiet when gaming online because he’s focusing but then depending on the game, he’ll scream at random and you’ll rip your headset off because he startled you.

“I forgot you were still in the game.”

“I forgot you were still in the call.”

If it’s a horror game, I can already see you with your headset off and just hearing the chat from a speaker or something, otherwise you’ll wake up the next day with the same hearing you get after being front row at a concert near the speakers.

And if you jump easily or get scared easily to the point where you also scream, best believe Jisung isn’t taking chances either.

Anyways, I know I said he would leave you on delivered for days but like Hyunjin, talking to him would be hella fun. I mean, the man is one of the funniest idols in my opinion.

And for free too?

Just know you’ll be laughing so hard you enter a different plane of reality.

You would have the friendship where if one of you are sad or needs to vent, you’ll drop everything to be there to listen. Doesn’t matter if you’re busy or in a vastly different mood, it’s all ears.

Fighting the urge to not put ‘he would listen’ for every member but I genuinely do believe they would LISTEN.

Jisung seems like the type to send voice messages rather than texts. I KNOW y’all remember that one voice message he sent.

Before I move on; Anime nights with him. Just you two on a call watching the same anime and syncing up the times so neither of you are ahead or behind. :]

Felix

Where you met? Probably TikTok. Bet.

Let me set the scene: You’re scrolling on TikTok when you see a TikTok of Felix. You comment on it. Boom, internet friendship has blossomed.

He would send you TikTok's, reels, or shorts. Whatever the man finds funny tbh. It doesn’t matter if YOU find it funny. If he finds it funny, he’s sending it. Now, he would send videos or memes that reminds him of you and ones he knows you would find funny, but the majority? Buckle up.

Bet he would probably get lost in it all and you’ll open your phone to see the ‘57 new messages’ banner. lmao.

“FELIX??? 57???”

‘3 new messages’

“Oh, my bad.”

And then you probably spend nearly an hour trying to watch all of the TikTok's he sends because they are funny. The man has taste.

Danceracha pun intended.

Anyways, it goes both ways too. I did not intend to make Felix sound like a TikTok addict. LMAO I meant… Whatever, y’all know what I meant.

OH expect recipes and pictures of his work in the kitchen. Expect to read mini reviews about his thoughts on these dishes.

I can see you both having the type of friendship where you can freely roast each other and not have your feelings hurt because you know in the end, it’s jokes about you’d both defend each other if anyone else roasted you like that.

Maybe nicknames that sound hurtful to a third party but are actually terms of endearment/ inside jokes between the two of you.

Seungmin

I think it’s funny that every crack edit/ snapchat meme AU I see, Seungmin is the one that sends ‘streaks’ snapchats and it gets me every time so I’m going to keep that going here.

Where you met? Wrong number situation but then you move to snapchat every so often.

“We have an ⌛.”

“LET’S PLAY 8 BALL!”

“WE STILL HAVE AN HOURGLASS.”

… A few seconds later, you get a message indicating it’s your turn on 8 ball.

No but Seungmin is such a sweetie, idc what y’all have to say about that. I see him as the type to watch/read/do something just because you like it and want someone to talk about it to.

Even if he isn’t particularly interested, he just wants to talk with you more, even if it means treading into territories he swore not to.

Back to snapchat… Or any social media, anything you post, he’s usually always the first person to see it. Unintentionally, but hey, you’re the one posting at the same time he decides to come online.

Always so happy when you message him, letting him know you’ve preordered their albums or even just watched/listened to their comebacks. Your support means a lot to him and he hopes to/is as supportive to you in the things you choose to pursue.

Even hobbies, he doesn’t judge.

I also think he, like Felix, has the ‘roast each other without consequences’ dynamic.

Seungmin loving train does not STOP and I hope y’all choo choo the fuck out of the way if you’re gonna disagree.

I.N

Where you met? Haha, he actually met you irl first and because he was only in the area for a day, you swapped info and now you have a time zone separating you.

Luckily, he didn’t text you once and then became another follower!

I feel like he’s the chaotic internet friend. If you’ve been on the internet long enough, I know you’ve had one.

Y’all probably think it’s Jisung that would have this title, and it probably is, but Jeongin??

For example, Y’all remember that one live he did where he drank hella energy drinks & 3racha was in the states?

Yeah. Unsupervised time go brrrr. Okay? and you’re the one that hears about it first hand because he’s doing chaotic shit over video calls or texting messages and you can’t do anything.

He knows you can’t.

“Hey :)” - “Guess what?”

“God damnit.”

“I bought four giant bags of sugar.”

“wHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO WITH FOUR GIANT BAGS OF SUGAR?????”

He likes to joke with you a lot. For example, he was kidding about having four giant bags of sugar.

But your reaction was funny to him, therefore he will keep joking around like this because he loves your reactions and he loves that you haven’t blocked him for giving you so much grief.

[runningfrom2am]

“You were scared. Of him.” BABY BOY DID YOU EVEN HEAR WHAT SHE SAID ABOUT THE GAMES??

how i love when there’s a letter to feel guilty about, from beyond the grave.

“Or that if you’re out on cold nights when the breeze chills your skin, you’ll think of us.” THERE IT IS!!!

“Alas, that love, so gentle in his view, / Should be so tyrannous and rough in proof!” the way that this is their relationship summary-

the fact that he sent the bread and the water only to buy her trust back is very reasonable and therefore disturbing.

SHE WOULD HAVE DIED WITHOUT HIS MOTHER’S SCARF!! she still cries for ruining something coryo gave her even after last night. I AM UNWELL!!

i just know that lucky and dr gaul are both losing it at the back for not having cameras in the vents. they’re very close to the end of the games yet they cannot see what is happening.

even the girl who had planned to stay still and wait for her end resorts to survival when fate knocks on her door and there is too much to lose.

okay we’re gonna rock with the same numbering system for this one bc we have SEVERAL points to go over.

(also i did have to reread it rq before i answered this bc i wrote and edited this like two weeks ago lol)

1. i mean,, at least he’s kinda self aware HAHAHA. actually very SELF aware and not very contextually observant rn. like babe you KNOW how terrified she was already and now the only person in this whole place who she trusts has started swinging too?! ZERO critical thinking skills.

2. yeahhhhh yk i had to do it 🤭 at first when i was writing it i was like “this is way too wordy” but then i was like “raye,,, duh words are her whole thing don’t be dumb” so i let it go on as long as it needed to haha. like i can see it SO vividly like it was probably hard to read i just KNOW she covered that whole sheet in writing without an inch to spare. i also feel like for her it wasn’t enough, but she would never complain or dare ask for another sheet.

3. title drop let’s goooooo (there will be more i think i do this a few times lol)

4. no bc that quote was so perfect i’ve been sitting on it since i started writing this series it’s been rotting in my notes waiting to be used and i just 🥹 of COURSE that’s what she would use as her real confession i’ll actually puke ab it.

as much as he thought the monologue was a confession, it really wasn’t. he heard what he wanted to hear, that she loved him and cared about him. which she does, but her intention was to beg and plead with him to be good and stay that way. she had no receipts besides his namesake and where he lived to base this theory off of, but i think after they discussed the tragedy of coriolanus at length she just wanted to hammer home that he is not what his name would suggest. this letter though was the realest confession she would give, through written word, and i think that’s very real to who she is, especially being so far from home and her family and her safe space.

5. pretending that he wanted her to help jessup was literally all he could do!! to him, what’s the alternative? give her the cold shoulder in the most vulnerable (likely final) days of her life? he couldn’t do that even if he wanted to, i think. i don’t think it successfully buys her trust, but i do think it is so motivational for her to just know that at the very least he is still there.

6. omg yeah me too i am SICK. she’s crying and apologizing knowing damn well he can’t even hear it or see what she’s doing but she feels just awful even though it means she would survive. as if that’s not the whole reason he gave it to her. he gave her the go ahead to use his mothers scarf to kill someone if she had to- and she feels that guilty about using it to save herself?? i’ll puke ab this actually she is so sweet. she cares about him so so deeply and i think a massive part of her fear, that kept her up all night, was that that fact that she loves him cares did not change.

7. yeah they did NOT think that one through and ik it’s just eating dr. gaul ALIVE bro. this could also be the beginning (assuming the games do continue- who knows) of the trackers that monitor heart rates and vitals of tributes.

8. OKAY YES so i’m gonna tie this into point 6 too bc i feel like that’s the manifestation of this internal battle she’s having. if she had originally planned to give up her life at the very beginning, i can so easily see the guilt that she’s feeling over every little thing she’s doing to preserve her own life beyond that point. so not only is she ruining his late mothers beautiful scarf, she’s also betraying herself. the “old her”, if you will. she shouldn’t be alive anyways, she will die soon anyways, so it feels like a waste to ruin this scarf in the process when she likely believes it will be peeled off her dead body regardless. but she still does it.

she told herself that coryo was what changed that plan- that she wanted to win for him, but i don’t even know that that’s fully true. maybe it was about saving herself all along, but she felt too horribly guilty about the circumstances to even admit that to herself. especially now that she’s starting to devolve mentally, she opens the compact knowing that its contents will kill the boys that are after her, but immediately she’s going “oh, it looks like salt” and committing to that narrative so desperately so she can hide from herself that now not only is she ruining the scarf to save herself, that she’s also directly causing fatal harm to others which she has always sworn she would never do.

[melancholiepeufiable]

Hi 😁 for the prompts for Sebchal, n*6 ?

leo!!! hi! thank you for requesting ❤️ i’m OBSSESSED with sanctuary. i loved the one-shot you did as well, thank you for gifting us with your work &lt;3

6. “Please stop trying to hide them from me.”

for some reason, this prompt was hard to think of an idea for without making it angsty, haha. i hope you enjoy!!!

******

If Charles had one wish in life, he’d wish to win the championship. If he had a second, he’d wish for all headbands to disappear off the face of the earth. 

To say he hated them was a severe understatement. 

At first, he liked them. He liked how they framed Seb’s face and kept his curls back. Then it became less about the hair and more about Sebastian choosing to wear them because why not? 

The problem was: Charles really liked Seb’s hair. If he had to name a favourite part of his boyfriend (which he never would because he loved every part of him, from top to bottom, even when Seb was annoying), the hair would compete for the top spot. 

“Emotional support headband” – Charles knew what the internet was calling it. He also knew that Sebastian didn’t care one bit. In fact, the man laughed when Charles told him. 

“Funny people. I like them.” Sebastian had replied, then pulled one on and left the house. 

Charles had no choice. It was time to take matters into his own hands. He waited and watched, as patiently as a predator stalked a prey. He listened when Seb spoke, learning of his plans to visit some friends. 

He wore a cap. 

Charles smiled, all teeth, and gave Seb a passionate kiss that left the man breathless and wanting more. Then he pushed Seb out the door. “See you later.”

—

Sebastian ransacked the house, searching everywhere. He opened cabinets, upturned their closet, checked under the bed. He was in his office, rummaging through the drawers. 

“Where are they?”

Charles shrugged, crossing his arms. “Maybe the cat ate them.”

“We don’t have a cat.”

“Neighbour’s cat.” He laughed, failing to suppress his amusement.  

Seb scowled, sighing in frustration. 

Charles watched as he swallowed his rage, fists balling, then flexing as opened another drawer. 

Calmly, Sebastian said. “Please stop trying to hide them from me.”

He rolled his eyes. “I am not trying, I–” 

A small, proud hum buzzed out of Seb’s throat, interrupting him. Charles’ blood ran cold. 

No. This cannot be happening. 

He stood, a thin, white headband pinched between his fingers. Smugly, he raised his brows, cheeks chubby as he smiled. 

Charles lunged across the desk, making a grab for it. 

Seb took a step back, shielding it with a frown. “What are you doing?”

“Give it to me.” Not a single coherent thought went through his mind, apart from: destroy it. Take it and rip it to bits. Burn it, boil it, put it in the oven. 

“No.”

Charles grabbed the scissors from the wooden pencil holder Seb had gotten from a fan. He’d raved about it for weeks, showing Charles every single detail, from the painted rim to the carved bees, and every time he did, Charles melted. Now, however, Charles didn’t care. 

Seb covered the headband, brows furrowed as he glanced between Charles’ face and the scissors. Genuine fear flickered for a millisecond before it changed to irritation. “Stop it.”

He rounded the desk, following Seb as he stepped closer to the couch. It was easy with Seb – he had always been smaller, lighter, slimmer. Desperate times called for desperate measures. Charles twirled Seb around, careful with the scissors, until he tossed him on the couch, and grabbed Seb’s wrist. He pinned Seb’s free hand with his knee, gentle enough that there was a chance Seb could pull free. 

Cruelly, Charles pulled Seb’s wrist in front of his face. “This thing… this cursed thing must go.”

“No, wait, just–”

He snipped it in half, half-delirious at the joy of having gotten rid of it. He cut it again, gleeful as it dropped on Seb’s stomach. Relief poured out, his shoulders slumping as he took a deep breath. It’d been done. Finally. 

A quiet noise pulled him out of his high, leaving his fingers cold and heart aching. 

Seb pouted, staring at the material on his shirt. He dropped the headband, face drooping in sadness. 

Oh no. What have I done?

Charles tightened the hold on Seb’s wrist, bringing it to his lips to pepper kisses. “Oh– I’m sorry, Seb. I don’t know what got into me. You are very– you don’t need that. I shouldn’t have… I’m sorry.”

If Charles wasn’t so deep in guilt, he might’ve noticed the smile forming on Sebastian’s lips. Instead, he yelped when Seb tugged him down, rolling them over for a cuddle. He placed his head on Charles’ chest, arms wrapped across his waist. 

“Did you really hate them that much?” 

Heat blazed on his cheeks, the admission worse than anything Charles ever confessed to. “Yes.” 

Seb laughed, light and sweet. Charles’ heart grew a thousand times. He’d never bore of hearing it. 

“I am sorry, Seb.” Charles nuzzled his hair, running a hand over Seb’s back. “It was not right of me.”

He looked up, smiling. 

“What?”

Slowly, Seb reached under the couch and lifted a thin, grey headband. “You didn’t think you got all of them, did you?”

[beamattack]

Hi hello I love you art and especially your Zelda AU/fake game. 💛 I asked a million years ago about an idea for a monster in your setting and then never followed up because ADHD. So here I am, finally putting together all the thoughts I have.

The monster is called a Tikapuut [from the Finnish word for ladder]. It's a tall, spindly thing with an almost exposed central spine/core and dozens of rows of bony rib-like structures all along the core. The ribs have holes and ridges that shift and create an unsettling, eerie whistle as wind passes through them. The ribs are large and surprisingly articulated, but fragile and breakable with a solid hit. It moves fast, though, snapping forward up to almost its full length around it with an over 180 degree arc around it.

To most creatures, the music of the Tikapuut is grating; it's atonal, uneven, makes your hair stand on end, touches the fear part of your brain. To fairies, though, the music is hypnotic. It's still creepy, but it draws them in. When a fairy gets close, the Tikapuut lashes out and consumes it, grabbing it with the spindly ribs and bringing it to its toothy mouth with a motion almost like an elevator; it closes lower pairs of ribs as it opens upper pairs, forcing the captured fairy higher and higher up the spine. A standard size Tikapuut can bring a fairy from the base of its spine to its mouth in about a minute.

Tikapuut are rare and solitary. Typically, they find a spot relatively near a fairy fountain or other magically-dense spot to lure in a steady stream of wayward fairies and stay there for decades (centuries, if they are fed enough). They don't like to plant themselves too close to the fountains, because they risk overfeeding and wiping out the fairy population (or drawing unwanted attention). A Tikapuut ideally lives off of 3 or 4 fairies a year, but can survive on 1 or 2 per decade if desperate. Because fairies are basically raw magic, Tikapuut can grow incredibly large and powerful if well fed.

Overall, they are deeply unsettling to look at and be around. Hearing the music of a Tikapuut is a bad omen because they prey on fairies, a symbol of goodness in most cultures in Hyrule, but it also signals that there will likely be fewer monsters around, as monsters are equally unsettled by the sound. Be wary, though; the monsters you do find around a Tikapuut lair are more agitated and prone to attack.

(Sorry for the late reply!) Whoaaa what a cool monster!! And scary too…. It would fit right into the setting, haha! It's a really interesting read, I love monster designs. I can tell you've thought about it carefully! It would be really creepy, hearing its sounds and trying to figure out where it's hidden!!

Thank you so much for sending this to me!! the fact that i've made something that sparks ideas in others makes me really happy :'))) I can't remember if i answered that earlier ask privately or not, but I hope you don't mind me making this ask public, I think it was such a cool idea that more people should see it!! :^D If you want me to remove it from my blog, feel free to tell me 👍 Thank you!

[traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors]

TW – child sexual abuse, organized abuse, forced prostitution of a child / trafficking(?), negative talk of my own disabilites/being intersex, one mention of dying young because of said disabilities

(i didn't realise how heavy this was until going back to add these warnings after writing haha, feel free to delete if this is too much at all and i apologize if it is)

hi, i'm not sure what exactly i'm looking for by sending this, sorry. i think i just need to get all of my thoughts out honestly, but if you have any advice or kind words they're very appreciated <3

apology in advance if this is a little. jumbled? i've never put any of this down in words before, sorry

i'm 15 years old, and i feel like i have too many problems with getting older. every month that passes by feels like i'm just getting closer to something horrible. it feels like i'm watching milk expire.

i think the main reason is because i was sexually abused as a child. multiple people were involved in it, including my mother (who i am away from now) and other distant family members. she was paid by the people doing it. it had been happening since i was born and it stopped when i was 10, when i moved in with my father.

i think the main thing that influenced the fear i have now of getting older is one specific 'client'. he hurt me on a regular basis, but i also knew him outside of that because he was friends with my mother. he'd pick me up from school and help me with homework and buy me things when he wasn't hurting me, and when i was young and that was normal to me he was somebody i cared for a lot. when i turned 8 he dropped contact completely. told my mother i was 'too old for his tastes' and i never heard from him again.

i know it's something i should've been happy about. it was one less person abusing me, and i should've been happy, but when i was 8 what was happening to me was what i thought was normal. it had been my entire life, and he'd been there since i was months old both to hurt me and to not. i grew up thinking he was in love with me, and suddenly i was just. too old. none of it mattered anymore, because 8 years old was 'too old' for a 34 year old man.

every year since then, at every birthday there's just been a lingering feeling that i'm 'too old'. i had an expiration date to him, and now every year i'm just waiting until i reach my expiration date for everyone else. i think i already have, in some ways.

i'm intersex and physically disabled, both from disabilities caused by repeated injuries and ones i've had from birth. i wonder if that was part of it sometimes. i think for some people i reached my expiration date the second i was born and the doctors knew i was wrong in so many ways. maybe it's morbid, but sometimes i think the fact that i'm going to die young because of it is an act of mercy.

i don't want to feel old anymore. i wanna be young like everybody says i am and i want to be normal. i want a normal body and i want to not have an expiration date anymore. i want my autonomy back and i want my body back and i want to be a kid. i hate that i can't have any of that anymore and i hate everyone who took it from me and i'm so tired of grieving a version of me that never existed

if you read this all the way through, thank you for listening to me, even if you don't have anything to respond with. i've never put any of this down into words before and even if you don't, it's been more helpful than i can express just to finally feel safe enough to even type this out. your blog is an amazing space <3

-🌊

Hi 🌊,

I'm so sorry about what you've been through, and while the SA happened when you were younger, you are still a child (not in a demeaning way, just a matter of fact way). I think it can be hard to recognize this especially if you've had experiences where you were made to feel like you're "too old". It makes sense to tie your sense of worth so closely to this man due to potential trauma bonding or grooming. And having the horrific experiences that you've survived can certainly feel like your innocence or childhood was permanently stolen from you.

I know in many ways society has framed it so that being disabled or intersex is seen as "not normal" and somehow wrong, but it could be helpful to remember that normalcy is a subjective experience because being intersex and disabled is normal for someone who is intersex and disabled. What society deems abnormal can come with hefty stigma that can be easy to internalize, especially as someone from marginalized demographics.

If you can access or afford it, a mental health professional such as a therapist could help you process your experiences, how they've shaped your self-perception, and can equip you with some healthy coping mechanisms that you can take with you along your healing journey.

If anyone has any comments or suggestions, feel free to add on. Otherwise, I hope I could help, and please let us know if you need anything.

-Bun

[dcwnthercbbithcle]

SOMEHOW DIDN'T REALIZE YOU MADE ONE FOR DOE JDJDJSJJS but anyways. Claudette is trying <3 (and an obligatory Bro'Dee since he seems to be the bingo master?????? Like the 3rd time he's almost gotten a full board dndjsksk)

(The more squiggly lines are sorta-kindas, not yes or no)

I AM SO LATE TO RESPONDING THIS TO THIS BUT !!!!! this is so so interesting and I love it!!! Claudette is doing her best and I like to joke that like, her, Gonzo and Beavis as the construction crew Doe has accrued to try and 'make her better' she cannot be fixed, I'm afraid!

The situations can evolve so that she becomes more stable, comfortable and inclined to drop more harmful/destructive habits! (like her habit of breaking and entering) But there are parts that will never fully disappear, like her amorality, her lack of respect of care for property laws, her instinct to lie when fearful (a trauma response from her parents and reinforced by her time on the road/streets that really can't be unlearned! She can trust someone wholeheartedly, but she'll never be able to repress the knee jerk adrenaline fear of 'oh god, they're angry/suspicious/aggressive/etc. I need to deflect or they're going to HURT* me')

*I'm not talking hurt as in a slap (not that a slap alone isn't serious!), Doe expects that if she doesn't deescalate a situation by any means, she will get serious injuries that will leave an impact. Her parents, unintentionally broke a couple teeth of hers (different occasions) that lead to a potentially fatal infection in that tooth, she has scars from struggling against her brothers trying to drag her home, and well, we all know about the homeless runaway struggles!

BUT ALSO BRO'DEEEEEEE

BRO'DEE CAN SCRUFF DOE AND REHAB HER LIKE A FERAL KITTEN AND I LOVE THAT FOR HIM, I know this bingo is mostly romantic but I know Bro'Dee is looking at her as too young/small (Doe is so indignant about that, she's in her twenties and she can't help she's short! Bro'Dee is practically a giant! She can't help that she is the size of a house cat to him!) and he's just! He likes having her around as a pal, as a little pupil (even though I don't think Doe realizes he's mentoring her! Haha) and a sort of little sister/daughter type deal, y'know?? She is climbing over him, I know this in my heart and he's so patient with her! Also I know you said that Bro'Dee can't real vibe with the fact somedays she just can't be touched whatsoever and kind of has to exist like a ghost, but I know he's like, he's careful and respectful about it! He may not love it but seeing her discomfort, his heart is so big and he wants to understand! I love him!

[shivunin]

3, 8, 9 + 19!

Thank you so much for asking! 💗I did a varied assortment of OCs for each.

(OC Creation Ask Game)

3. How did you choose their name?

Maria: I started editing "Marian" in the character creator, deleted the last letter and went "wait. I could make her...like me..." and so she has been Maria ever since

Elowen and Arianwen: I looked up "eowyn" (obviously one of the best fantasy names) in a baby name site to see linguistically similar names and these were both suggestions. Cornish in origin, according to a somewhat dubious website.

Jesse: Loosely named after Jesse James, a bandit from the wild west whose story was greatly sensationalized and romanticized after his death.

Tav: I like the idea of playing with the "canon" name in RPGs like this, so I found two names I liked (Octavia and Tavitha) and decided they were both hers at different points of her life. Octavia sounds fancier, more fitting to her life as an artisan and rising star of Baldur's Gate. Tavitha sounds like a nickname, and one she might choose in a tense moment as her new name. The latter stuck.

8. What (if anything) do you relate to within their character/story?

Ohh man. Writing them all is like therapy in some ways haha. So a little bit of every one of them. To be more specific:

Arianwen: I too am impatient and annoyed by persistent sounds and would much rather leave than have a frustrating conversation. Used to be okay at throwing knives too, but never at people.

Maria: Definitely the urge to be the entertainer when in a group. Also the terrible puns haha.

Elowen: The fear of failure, for sure.

Emmaera: I get lost when researching or focusing on things, too, and often forget to eat or sleep if I'm really deep in something. Also, there's a scene in Wander where she takes off from a party to sulk on that long balcony outside Leliana's table and I've done that plenty of times (obviously in different locations).

Salshira: In a previous life, I had to be absolutely perfect all of the time. I remember how awful and restrictive it felt to not be allowed to have an opinion, to need to be able to misdirect people with a sweet word or an anecdote. More than anything, I relate to her struggle to figure out which parts are real.

9. Are they based off of you, in some way?

I feel like I gave bits of this away above, but:

Arianwen: I was not allowed to be angry for a long time, so Wen is definitely an expression of that.

Maria: Older sister syndrome. Also guy who won't stop doing bits syndrome.

Jesse: Is explicitly Hispanic in a way that the rest of them can't be, by virtue of being from actual Earth. She was born not terribly far from where I live now and likes paper books like I do.

Tav: Is the least like me out of all of them, but I am loyal to a fault and so is she.

19. What is your favorite fact about your OC?

Answered here!

[averymayhemeveryday]

It's tough for people with ADHD to envision the future (also tough for people with aphantasia, it turns out)

ah fuck, i say. i am not *that* surprised that ADHD probably plays a large part of knowing in my heart of hearts that the future is a black void which i can only stare into and never bend to my will, but it's still a little startling to see it staring back at me.

let's just say the time i nearly failed 8th grade english continues to make more and more sense. we had to write a paper on a career, ostensibly framed as doing legwork for something we maybe wanted to do when we 'grew up', looking up salaries and education requirements and what the job is like, and... i couldn't choose. you've got someone who in elementary school made a list of jobs, one for each day of the week, ranging from veterinarian to paleontologist to cement truck driver-- how do you expect me to pick one thing to research and write about in that context? so i didn't do it. or, at least, i didn't do it willingly; it took my parents begging me to just pick SOMETHING it doesn't matter what and the fact that i really didn't want to fail 8th grade for me to pull something together about being a jeweler and finally turn it in, very very late.

i used to pull that story out as kind of a joke. haha you think i'm smart but you'll never guess how close i come to fucking it up all the time. haha you think i can do anything i want to but you'll never guess how often i do nothing because i don't know what i want to do. don't know what i want to commit myself to.

since then i've found i can go about 3-5 years of taking any particular thing somewhat seriously and then i've burnt out on it and it's the last thing i want to touch. maybe i'll come back around to it eventually, but (so far) never to the extent of involvement or enjoyment as the first time. and that just... sucks. it makes it really hard to want to throw myself fully into anything, because of the fear that something will happen (internally, when i've learned all i feel like learning about something and get bored or do it too much and burn out OR externally, hi pandemic) and i'll be back at square one with a few new specific skills of little-to-no use in other applications under my belt and the same old sense that i've just disappointed the people/fans/family that thought i was doing well and should have kept going. and disappointed myself, because while i never had a clear picture of where i was going with what i was doing, i'm positive i didn't want it to fall apart like THAT.

The hardest thing is to do something you don't want to do when you also can't imagine how it will benefit you

ah fuck, i repeat, as i continue to put off finding a therapist.

Today I came home at noon from a short trip, cold, wet and grumpy because it's snowing, but temperature just above freezing point. When I got in I stopped for a minute and looked around the hallway and into the kitchen. There is a change! Hallway looks much better than one month ago and the kitchen, too! There's lots of free floor! So no matter what I'll manage today or tomorrow, NaClYoHo has been a great help in leveling down the mess in these two areas

Oh yay, I'm so glad! Yeah, sometimes you don't notice just what a difference it makes until you're out of the house for a bit, and for some people that isn't happening very often these days. The first time I scrubbed down my bathroom sink in my old apartment, it went basically from yellow-grey to white, and every time I walked into the bathroom for a week I was shocked by it.

My condo, I must say, looks cleaner in parts, but overall still doesn't look "tidy", and that's okay. I know the changes I've made, and some of the tidiness will come in time, but also just...whether or not it looks better, if it feels good, that matters too.

It's tough for people with ADHD to envision the future (also tough for people with aphantasia, it turns out) but for me, I've done this enough to know that while I can't necessarily see HOW what I've done will help me months from now, there will be moments in 2024 where I stop and think, "Hey, thanks, Past Sam, that really helped." The hardest thing is to do something you don't want to do when you also can't imagine how it will benefit you, so it's important to really mark those moments where you do see benefit, remember them and try to keep them with you. The work we do matters even when we can't measure exactly how.

[m1d-45]

hidden blessings

summary: thoma takes you to the teahouse, but you two are interrupted. you don’t know whether it’s fortunate or not, but it will affect your trajectory within inazuma.

a/n: this one goes out to @shizunxie and @alexteea, who asked for a part two to small miracles. i now fear talking in the tags [/hj].

word count: ~2.1k

-> warnings: spoilers for inazuma archon quest, spoilers for ayato story quest, probably out of character ayato…. green tea?

-> lowercase intended!

taglist: @samarill

<< first part || < masterlist > || third part >>

komore teahouse is warm.

the moment the door opens, it’s the first thing you notice. the air smells of honey and spices, heated by some invisible fire. your hand is still in thoma’s, leading you behind him as he moves into the teahouse.

taroumaru sits up a little straighter on the counter as you two approach, but doesn’t seem on guard. strange, considering you’re not a member of the kamisatos, but since you have thoma with you…

“hey there taroumaru! is anybody here?”

the dog barks once. you don’t know what that means, but thoma seems satisfied, pulling you to one of the tea rooms.

“komore teahouse is owned and operated by the yashiro commission, so only those approved by the con can enter. whoever your hiding from-“ how did he know? “-can’t get in here, alright?”

he waves at a cushion and starts to fiddle with a tea set, lighting a small flame on the end of one of his fingers for the heating element. it’s strange to see such nonchalant usage of his vision… but wouldn’t that be normal here?

people with dendro visions selling herbs grown to order, hydro users automatically refilling their drinks, anemo wielders catching a dropped pen or paper before it hits the ground…

not for the first time, you wonder how you ended up in such a world.

“there! that should be ready soon. i’ve made you green tea, hope you don’t mind.”

you shake your head. even plain water would be fine to relieve the burn of salt on your tongue, and the fact that he went so far to make you tea when he barely knew you..

you lick your lips, “thank you.”

he waves it off with a laugh, sitting down himself. “oh, don’t worry about it. and please, save your breath, id hate for you to irritate your throat on my behalf.”

you swallow. salt stings. you’re quickly getting tired of the taste.

“that being said, i do have some questions, if you don’t mind. for starters, you are hiding from the shogunate, right?”

you pause, watching the fire flicker. yes, he’s with the yashiro commission, but he personally had to hide with yoimiya from the vision hunt decree, didn’t he?

you nod.

“thought so… well, the good news is that i can help you, but you have to tell me why they’re looking for you, alright?”

there it is. the fact that he went so long without asking why you were hiding is a testament to his character, but even he couldn’t trust fully when he’s so close to the kamisatos.

though, he did bring you into the teahouse…

“you stay here, and i’ll go get a notepad from the back room. if the tea’s done by then, feel free to pour yourself a cup!”

he stands up from his spot and exits the tearoom, hesitating for a moment in the doorway before undoing the string keeping the cover tied above the doorway. the mat rolls down smoothly, swaying, and you’re suddenly alone in the room.

though being ‘alone’ probably doesn’t apply in a tearoom belonging to the kamisato clan. you don’t remember seeing the girl at the front, nor have you heard the other two NPCs inside, but that must only mean there’s more security elsewhere.

and that the clan must have moved the prior personnel.

…like to hunt for the imposter running around teyvat.

no matter how kind they looked, they were still involved with the shogunate. there’s no way they haven’t heard of the situation, and have likely dispatched some of their best to find you.

and you’ve walked right into one of their bases.

suddenly the warmth in the room feels oppressive, the soft smell of green tea overwhelming. you shouldn’t have caved. you shouldn’t have agreed to come with thoma, shouldn’t have let his kindness pull at your bruised, beaten heart, you shouldn’t you shouldn’t you shouldn’t-

“-ot necessary, my lord, i-“

“-best for you. please, allow-“

words outside your room pull you from your thoughts, muffled by your heartbeat in your ears. it’s familiar but you don’t know why, footsteps and voices passing through the thin walls. three men are speaking, and are quickly approaching your room.

you tense, but settle for grabbing a spoon to try and soothe yourself. they won’t come in here, you tell yourself. you have to trust thoma.

the footsteps stop.

“is this the room?”

it’s not your room. it’s not. you’re safe in the teahouse. you have to be. thoma is on your side.

fingers fit between the mat and the floor, carefully curling the edge to roll it back up.

no.

three sets of shoes appear. two are dark, one dressier with a golden design on it, and the third are taller, heeled, with a buckle. the mat rolls higher, almost ridiculously slow, revealing details you struggle to place.

white pants. brown striped shorts. a black belt, a jacket lined with purple on the inside, yellow tassels and black gloves and you hate that you don’t know who it is.

the mat reaches the ceiling, hands you now recognize as thoma’s tying it back up.

to his side are two men. one is dressed simply, like the many NPCs around the city, and the other…

kamisato ayato.

his clothes are far simpler than his model, but he’s unmistakable. calculating lavender eyes, framed by deceptively soft eyeliner and baby blue bangs. the vision dangling off his hip, the set of his shoulders….

it’s only by sheer will that your terror doesn’t show on your face.

the unidentified man hums, crossing his arms, and thoma looked between the two of them with obvious unease. they must be the voices you heard.

“hello.”

ayato is the one who breaks the silence, and you almost wish he hadn’t. his presence is far more intimidating in person, very much so what you should have expected from somebody of his status. you clutch your spoon tighter.

“i don’t recognize them, my lord,” the unnamed man says, and something in ayato’s eyes shift. you can’t decide if it’s better or worse.

“so you’re the one that’s caught thoma’s eye.” ayato walks into the room, taking a seat across the table from you. “why?”

you shouldn’t be surprised he knew that. you still are, as information couldn’t possibly be passed all the way to him in time for him to arrive.

thoma walks in, taking off the pot you didn’t notice was boiling, attempting to break the tension by pouring out two cups of tea.

the pot hesitates over the third cup. “hisashi, would you like some tea?”

hisashi. why is that name familiar?

the man—hisashi—shakes his head, but does walk in to lean against the doorframe. “no.”

the teapot is set back down on the table, but ayato raises a hand as thoma steps away.

“please, stay. i have as many questions for you as i do for…?”

his eyes turn to you and you can feel the bitter taste of salt burn away any thought you have of responding. the tea looks too hot to drink, and you’re not sure if green tea would taste the same here anyway.

“ah, i never got you your notepad!”

thoma tries to leave for a second time, and ayato stops him again with a questioning look.

what had you gotten yourself into?

“they’re sick, and their voice doesn’t sound too good. i was getting them a pen and paper to ask my own questions before..”

a small smile crossed the commissioner’s face. “excellent job, thoma. you may leave; and please, take your time.”

thoma quickly bows before leaving with hurried steps.

ayato’s gaze returns to you, and he picks up his cup, swirling it twice before taking a small sip. his eyes sweep your figure, pausing momentarily on the hand with the spoon. you let it go, pulling your hand back into your lap, and he hums. after another drink, he sets down his cup.

“you should really try some,” he says, nodding at your untouched tea. “thoma always makes excellent tea.”

you don’t doubt it, but you’re not keen on drinking something still steaming. it may be wise to drink it, something something green tea has medicinal properties and the warmth will ease your throat…. you still don’t touch it.

his eyes flash, and you feel like you passed some sort of test.

“are the shogunate after you?”

you nod.

“do you know why?”

you hesitate. you technically do, as it’s likely the same reason you were chased out of liyue and everywhere prior, but you still don’t know why they’re accusing you of such things. you didn’t do anything initially, you’d barely gotten out your name before…

“interesting.” you look back from where your eyes have wandered, seeing his smile has grown. apparently your silence was answer enough. “you’re not from inazuma.”

it’s not a question, but you shake your head no anyways.

“and yet you know me.”

why wouldn’t you? he’s the head of the yashiro commission, a prominent figure in inazuman politics. even outside of inazuma, surely there’s people that know the yashiro commissioner, right? you know he stays out of the public eye most chances, and that ayaka handles that side of things, but still. it can’t be that rare.

ayato takes another drink of his tea. you wonder when thoma will come back. ayato told him to ‘take his time,’ but finding a pen and paper shouldn’t…

…oh.

kamisato ayato. what else did you expect?

“do you have any plans to stay in inazuma?”

you didnt have plans at all, really. you fully expected to die in the ocean, whether by the fall or the waves or the rocks below. perhaps even osial, if you were unlucky. all you wanted was food and maybe some clothes; you didn’t think you’d get this far.

you shrug.

“given your state, i doubt you can leave,” he points out. “do you even have any mora?”

the jab works better than you thought it would, the memory of the kind hilichurls sharing the mora from the chests they guarded for you to get things from marketplaces sparking defensiveness. of course you have mora, because you had friends.

“even if you did-“ oh, he is far too good at his job “-i don’t believe it’s enough for you to make yourself presentable enough to get a job.” he’s speaking to his teacup, watching the tea swirl. “so i offer you a deal.”

of course. of course he wants a deal.

“you tell me why the shogunate is after you, and i will protect you from them.”

what.

there’s no way he could do that. he couldn’t just go against the tenryou commission like that. there’s no way. there has to be a catch.

“i can see you’re confused.” if you weren’t certain it would hurt, you’d have said something sharp in reply. “thoma is an excellent judge of character. though he is sometimes far too kind for his own good, he still knows a criminal when he sees one. i am inclined to agree with his judgement, and this wouldn’t be the first time the tenryou commission has unwittingly accused an innocent.”

…huh?

the sudden tone shift sends your brain in a loop, repeating his words over in your mind. he was offering you an out? why was he willing to go so far from his duties for somebody he didn’t know?

ayato finishes his tea, setting down the empty cup on a platter. he seems to be waiting for your response, surprisingly, and the only problem is that you don’t know what to say.

you’re faced with the same dilemma again: trust, and get involved with people that could get you in severe trouble were you to be caught, or decline, and risk getting caught quicker by giving up that safety.

footsteps project thoma’s rearrival. he hesitated in the doorway, likely sensing the tension, but comes in anyway, placing down first a plain notepad, then a similarly simple pen on top.

“would you like anything else, my lord?”

“sit, please.”

thoma pauses again, and it’s comforting to know that not everybody here knows everything.

that point is driven further home when he chooses to sit next to you rather than ayato.

the commissioner himself seems shocked, his eyes widening slightly as he sits up straighter. beside you, thoma’s hands twist in his lap, and you wonder if even he knows why he chose what he did.

ayato clears his throat, catching your attention once more.

“do you accept?”

[staysluttymyfriends97]

Sisters best friend , but love of my life part 2 ( Jake “Hangman” Seresin X Reader)

What you need to know: It is not very nice of Phoenix to jump to conclusions that Jake has no idea how Y/N feels about him. It is also not very nice what Jake feels he has to do to set things right. 

AN: I have some bad news... Part two might break your heart a little but do no worry I will put it back together  Also I am writing in the guy POV for the first time Im a little nerves about that. But go with me because I am so in love with how this turned out. 

Part one and part three my sweets 

There will be 3 more parts to this so just hold  on any hearts I have broken will be fixed ( that is a warning haha) 

As soon as I get to Phoenix I let her have it. “What on earth do you think you are doing?” I try to keep my voice down so Y/N doesn’t hear me.

 I want to check over my shoulder to make sure she is in the barn. I know that if I look at her she’ll be worried about how angry my face looks. 

“What did you tell her?” I let my hands rest on my hips.

“I just told her you carry her letters with you.” She was acting way too calm and I didn't like it. Phoenix was used to being in the face of danger, so I knew right now she was channeling that reserve. I raise my eyebrow at her. I know there is more.

She sighs, “I also told her to ask you about why.” 

I swear I could see red. Years I have spent keeping Y/N just an arms length away was about to go out the  window. I want to see the fact that Phoenix thinks she is being a good friend. She thinks she is helping me out by pushing myself and Y/N together. What she doesn’t know is that she is swinging a bat at a hornets nest. I didn’t think I could regret my drunken night of telling Phoenix about Y/N anymore then I already did, but here we are.  I start to pace in front of her. I know Y/N will not jump to the conclusion that what Nat is trying to say is that I love her. Y/N is the type of person who will not jump to a happy ending. She will think of the reasonable first. To her, me wanting her the same way she wants me is not just unreasonable, it is unfathomable. I hate that I know that. I hate that I feel safe in the fact she will think nothing of it. But now, she will want to come to me for an answer anyway and I will have to come up with a lie to throw her off. I can’t tell her what letters I keep with me and I surely can’t tell her why. That would be my dead give away and Then she would know. I turn my body fully away from Phoenix, and look out over the farm.  Maybe an answer will hit me in the face if I just keep looking. I hear Nat shuffle her feet and then she spoke. 

“That girl loves you, it is rude to have her think her love it just one sided.” I whip my head around to look her in the face. 

Her face softens, and she almost looks sad. I want to tell her calmly why it has to be this way, but I can’t grasp the calm part of me right now.  

“Trust me it is much easier being the person who thinks it is one sided, than being the one who knows it's not.” My voice bites out as I face her. “Stop acting like a detective who just put the pieces of the puzzle together. You think I didn’t see the hope in her eyes when she turned 18? Or again when she turned 20? You don’t think I knew she was thinking ‘this will be it. He might  finally do something’? It kills me!” Digging my boot in the ground does nothing to help release some of my frustration. 

“Then do something about it, Hangman!” She pokes at my chest. 

“I fucking can’t.” I seethe. She is poking a bear, she just doesn’t know it yet. 

“Yes you can! What the hell is stopping you? Just tell her and go from there.” She throws her hands up in the air. 

“This isn’t fear. This isn’t a scared man who doesn’t know how to commit to one person.  This is my life being narrated by a legal document. A document signed 100 years ago saying the Seversin family cannot marry someone from the Y/L/N  family. They did it so the farm would never split. If someone from my family marries someone from hers they forfeit their right to run the farm one day. Don’t you understand? This place is her life. This farm is her Top Gun.”

It finally sinks in and it stops her from pushing farther. She doesn’t move and the downcast look on her face tells me she understands the gravity of what she has done.

Drunk me seemed to have left this part out when I told her about Y/n. I don’t know how. That stupid rule has been on my brain since I was 24. Now I have my friend in front of me who is upset with herself. 

From the way I act around them I don’t really blame her. A cocky man who doesn’t want to commit to one person, I can see how she got there. It is just in this small town of Texas, my home town, around that girl, that I am not that man. I know Phoenix was doing what she thought was best but you know what they say about good intentions: The road to hell is paved with them. 

I slide my hands in my back pockets as I turn to walk back, nodding my head in the barn's direction telling Phoenix to follow. I was done talking about it. Now I have to figure out what I was going to do about it. Phoenix falls into step with me. When we get to the barn I let her walk in before me and I allow the door to shut behind us. The wind picks up making it shut much harder than I wanted it too. The sound alone makes Y/N head swing towards me. I know she is reading my face and picking up on the anger. She has always been good at reading me. I could breathe the wrong way and she would be onto me in a second. Her eyebrows raise asking me the question. I just shake my head in response. 

“So, next on the tour I could show y’all the calving barn. It’s where all the baby cows are.” Kate said as she started to bounce on her feet again. She was always so happy. She is the most carefree of us all and it truly showed. She tows Bob by the arm to get him where he needed to go. Poor man looked like his eyes were going to pop out of his head. He just went with it with a small wince. Roster and I both were laughing at the interaction. Y/N was busy looking down at her watch and this gave me a moment to finally observe her. Her hat sat snugly on her head, she has her favorite striped shirt on, the blue one. Her cut off jeans allow me to see those strong legs of hers, tan from the summer sun down to her boot clad feet, with one tapping rhythmically on the barn floor. She does that when she gets focused, my heart squeezes at how well I know her. 

She let out a sigh, I quickly looked away from her. “Well this is where I depart on the welcome home tour. I should go check fences.” She gives a wave then makes her way to her horse's stall. 

I didn’t even have time to think before I spoke. “I will go with you.” Everyone turned to look at me. I just shrug my shoulders at them. “I’ve been in this barn my whole life. Plus this is me paying back Y/N for waking up early every morning to come help me.” I give Y/N a smile before I make my way to the tack room to gather her saddle.

 As I walk through the door I hear Bob ask what her horse’s name is. I laugh in anticipation of the answer and she shoots me a look over her shoulder. That knowing look just makes my love for her grow. 

“His name is Radish.” Y/N says with a smile. That could only be because she loves the question people ask next. 

“You named your horse, Radish?” Roster looks puzzled but everyone else got the joke. Man she loves it when she can get someone to call him horseradish.

“Yes I did, you see the reddish tint he has that is why. Also,  because Jake said I wouldn’t do it.” She cuts her eyes at me as she laughs. I make my way to the tack room to gather all the things she needs. When I step out I see she has gotten Radish out so the others could pet him before we saddle him up. 

“So this is your horse?” I don’t look at Bob as he asks the question. I move to step around him and throw the blanket on Radish’s back, having already set the saddle down at my feet. 

Me and Y/N answer at the same time. “He is ours.” She is standing on the other side of the horse so I look down at her over his back. I love how her face lights up when she says that. This horse is the one thing that is just mine and hers. Growing up we were the only ones who took care of him. So many nights of just me and her in this barn brushing him down and talking about how to train him. It was just me and her. How it should be. 

“He was Jake’s but I kind of took him. So we have share custody of him. He won’t let Jake ride him if I am around.” 

“We learned that the hard way.” 

“Don’t say “we”. I knew, but you just didn’t want to listen to me.” She rolls her eyes at me. She isn’t wrong but I just like saying we. I shake the thought away and finish tightening the saddle down. 

“Fine, you can be right this time.” I give Radish a slap on the butt as I move to walk around to the side the others are on. “He is all set. I’ll walk y’all out and go grab Ranger.” I give Y/N’s shoulder a squeeze as I walk past her, with the others to the end of the barn.

“Be good to them Kate. No tricking the boys into getting on a bull.” She just gives me a toothy smile. One of her favorite things is talking people into bull riding. I have seen her do it too many times to not bring it up now. She just rolls her eyes as she takes hold of Bob's arm again and starts dragging him along. I want to be upset that she seems to have some kind of crush on him. Between him or Roster, I will say I am happy with Bob. I stand in the doorway of the barn and just watch them walk away. I know as soon as I go back in the barn Y/N is going to start asking questions. As much as I want to lie to her and just brush it off, I know with one look I will be done. Any lie I could come up with would be gone. I turn on my heels and take a deep breath. Here goes nothing. 

I walk back in to see she has already put the tack on Ranger and has the leads for both horses in hand as she walks to the far end of the barn that leads out to  the field. 

“You didn’t have to do that, I was coming back.” She turns her head slightly to give me a look then rolls her eyes as she continues to walk to the exit. We have always done this. She dresses my horse while I dress hers. It started when she was younger and didn’t know how. As she learned she would just get Ranger, doing the same as I did. 

When I get to her, I reach to take the lead from her hands but she moves them away. Oh great we are doing this now. Just for fun I try one more time to take them from her. She just moves them farther away. She then takes both leads and ties them to a post by the doors. She faces me and no words need to be spoken as she places her hand on her hip and tilts her head to the side. 

“What was Phoenix going on about?” She asks like what Phoenix said was a joke and I was about to set her straight. What she doesn’t know is that my answer will blow her life up and tear the relationship we have apart.  

“Well, I don't know I wasn’t there.” I am trying just to brush it off. 

“Jake, please work with me here.” She takes a step towards me. Panic rushes in and I can’t think. 

“Then ask a question I can answer.” I sigh. “What letters do you carry with you?” 

“Please don’t ask me that.” 

“Why?” 

Damn her stubbornness. 

“Because I want to tell you the truth.”

“Then tell me the truth!” She exclaims. 

“I can’t.” 

“I’m not getting what the big deal is.” She’s getting frustrated with me, her mouth is doing that twitch. 

“If I tell you, you’ll understand.” 

She crosses her arms, waiting. 

I run my hand down my face in defeat. “The letter in my cockpit is one of you describing the farm with a picture of a rooster crowing at the sun.”

“And the one in your jump suit?” 

“It is the one when you were talking about your future. And your future husband. You drew a picture of two people holding hands.” 

“You have 100s of letters, why those?”

“Y/N Please stop.”

“Tell me why Jake!” She demands. 

“What good does knowing do?” I shrug. 

“Please? I will beg.” She warns. 

“You will never have to beg for anything from me. It has always been yours.” I say softly. 

Please don’t make me tell you the truth. Please just let me lie to you.

She shakes her head. “Jake.”

“The one in the cockpit is where I go home too. The one in my jumpsuit is who I go home to.”

I have been keeping that to myself for so long, it feels like a weight has been lifted off my chest. It's only when I look up at her the weight finds me again. I can almost feel her brain spinning. Her face keeps shifting. She has this joy that takes over then confusion. She then starts pacing. It's the cutest thing I have ever seen. Every few seconds she turns to me to speak but says nothing, then goes back to her pacing. I could let her do this forever. 

“So now what?” she finally turns to me. It is my turn to be confused.

“What do you mean now what?” 

“We feel the same jake. So now what do we do?” Her brow wrinkles. 

“We do nothing.” 

“What the fuck, that can’t be your answer.” 

“That is my answer.” I say firmly

“What? No. No that can’t be it. You can’t feel that way for me and want to do nothing.” She snaps. 

“Don’t you ever think I want to do nothing about it.” I warn. 

“Well here we are, Jake, you wanted to do nothing.” Her hands fall to her sides with her frustration. 

“This isn’t what I want! We can’t do anything. Why do you think I haven't told you all this time?” I plead. 

“Tell me this isn’t about the rule?” Her arms cross over her chest, and she pins me with a glare. 

“It's not a rule, it's a contract! Signed by our families saying they will never marry and if they do, they forfeit their right to the farm. You want this place right?” 

“How long have you known?” She demands. 

“Since you were 18.” I mutter. 

I didn’t see it coming but I felt it. The slap to my face was hard. I could feel the blood rushing to my face as I met her eyes again. She was full of anger now. Truth be told, I was okay with it. If she was mad at me, even if she hated me, maybe she wouldn’t want to be with me. She would keep this place. I wouldn’t have to spend my life being the one she loves and the one thing she regrets. She spins on her heels, takes the reins and rides off with Radish before I can say another word. 

Tag list: Here you are my beautiful people who wanted to be on the tag list! If you want to be added just let your girl know! Also you dont know the joy it brings me that people want to be on this tag list. 

@love2write2626​

@luckyladycreator2

@bxnnywatts

@rhirhikingston

@eternalsams

@dreamlandcreations

@topgunruinedme

@xxshea-barnesxx

@dempy

@shanimallina87

@lgg5989

@emily-b

@k-k0129

[lunaastoir]

fluff/relationships w the liyue crew

characters included: xiao, childe, beidou, and zhongli

ik i forgot ningguang i promise i’ll include her in part 2, i just didn’t have time :(

all x a gn! reader 

my liyue babies :,) ft. ningguang in spirit

an: i was listening to my soft playlist (more like listening to cupid’s chokehold on repeat, no i am not basic 🔪) and i thought some fluff headcanons would be cute w these sweet people

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

xiao

ok so no surprise that he hates liyue harbor

he hates anything w a lot of people in it so he prefers to stay at wangshu inn tyvm

but by contrast, you love liyue harbor sm (it’s gorgeous i mean c’mON)

you go there often to retrieve your commissions in order to stay closer to xiao (liyue harbor is closer than mondstadt he argues but you’re well aware that they’re both equally far away)

so if anyone asked, xiao would absolutely refuse to go to the harbor like i hate people??? why would you even ask???

but,,,he’s so sOFT for you

if you asked??? he would agree in a heartbeat

but since he’s >:( angsty boy, he makes you think that he won’t go even when he’s already decided that he’s coming w you

he puts up the “if you so require, then i guess i will assist you with your travels in liyue harbor” but in reality he would definitely have said yes even without the almond tofu

while he hates the harbor, he thinks that with you anything is bearable :,) simp

you take him to see xinyan to vibe w her music and you can tell he really enjoys it

even tho he’s like 🕴 the entire time, you see the softer look on his face and the very slight smile on his lips as he listens to the music and watches the crowd

so so so cute very soft for him

i do see him as a subtly touchy person in public like brushing the hair off your face, swiping his thumb across your cheek, or gently pulling your hair back when you have a plate of food in your hands 

the type to link your pinkies together - he claims it’s so you don’t get lost but yk better 

after the concert is done you take him to that one waypoint near mt. tianheng and the both of you just watch the city lights and the way they reflect beautifully on the water surrounding the harbor 

personal headcanon that xiao absolutely loves stargazing since he believes the stars are the one true constant in his life especially since he’s experienced so much loss (basically they’ll never leave him god i hate myself why do i make everything SAD)

mini headcanon off of that - he doesn’t stargaze with people,,, like ever 

it’s something he loves to do alone so the fact that he lets you stargaze w him and even allows you to shift your head onto his lap while you watch the sky is a huge deal 

he loves it when you softly whisper abt how your day was or something you saw that made you laugh 

he just loves hearing your voice, it automatically calms the voices in his head 

you absolutely ADORE when he has flowers in his hair especially cecilias (cecillias? ceccillias? idfk) and you make a point whenever you go to mondstadt to pick a fresh batch of cecilias just for xiao while enlisting the help of your favorite bard  

these soft moments on the mountain are usually when you’ll sweetly tuck in a flower or two in his hair while laughing 

he’ll blush fiercely while looking away but will tuck the cecilias in securely as you’re unable to do so due to the position you’re in on his lap

all in all - this was not meant to come out as a date idea but we’re going w it 

this is so cute xiao pls let me put flowers in your hair sweet boy <3

childe

god, loml, my favorite war criminal after eren yeager 

there’s never a dull moment w this man - if you wanted peace and quiet, why the hell are you dating him bestie???

is the type of person to yell out “Y/N, i can’t believe i ran into you here!” if he sees you somewhere even tho you explicitly told him you were going to be here in the morning (ik you have a good memory ajax don’t lie to me 😐)

i don’t see him as being obnoxious w pda unlike someone else kaeya but he would definitely participate (think: handholding, cheek kisses, an arm around your shoulders)

loves it when he comes home and sees you in an apron cooking 

domesticity just makes his heart melt so you can be sure that your face will be peppered w a lot of kisses afterwards <3 

absolutely ADORES it when you trace his scars absentmindedly when you’re lying down or even when you’re having dinner in public  

he’s been far from his family for so long that small acts of mindless affection like this really make his heart happy 

you have him drunk on your love luv haha see what i did there 

he will let you put makeup on him. no i do not take criticism ⛄️

he already has on lowkey thick eyeliner,,, don’t be shy put some more bestie 

he will shamelessly go out in public w whatever you made him wear - doesn’t really give a shit even tho he has a reputation to maintain 

speaking of reputation,,, yk his mask? yeah that one - the red hair accessory that he has on his head

well on the mask, he attached a little charm the both of you got together on your first date during lantern rite 

it’s this adorable fox that we all shamelessly kill for meat and he placed it so it anchored to the side of his mask so when he fights it isn’t a nuisance or anything (does that make sense??? i hope it does) 

his subordinates notice and while they’re stoic around childe, behind closed doors they do whisper abt the mysterious person who’s captured his heart 

not so mysterious anymore when they literally see him cling onto you during his daily patrol around the harbor 💀

it’s ok tho he’s lucky he’s cute 

bestie,,, pls give him a neck massage 

i just KNOW he’s tense there idk something abt the way he carries himself just screams “my neck hurts so bad someone pls help me i would ask but my pride literally will not let me”

so give him a neck massage :) don’t worry tho he’ll definitely return the favor and then some

LOVES TICKLE FIGHTS 

he’s obsessed w them,,, it’s just the faces you make??? he can’t get enough 

he loves seeing the pure joy and the brief fear (he’s kind of a sadist) in your eyes before he attacks you w those damned hands 

it reminds him a lot of simpler times w his siblings and he’s happy he brings you joy and makes you forget your worries - at least for a little while 

all in all, he’s a good boy and no i will not tolerate childe slander 🔪 kaeya slander tho 😏

beidou

you pulled beidou??? wow everyone’s jealous (pulled as in literally from the banner and in this context but no i do not have beidou and no i definitely do not want to talk abt it)

god made beidou and zhongli just so all of us could have a sexuality crisis 

anyways, being w her is hard i will not lie 

not bc she isn’t a capable lover - no, quite the contrary 

she’s an amazing partner but the problem here lies in the fact that she’s almost never on land 

it’s hard working a long distance relationship but y’all love each other so it works out :,) 

when she is physically present however, expect to never be bored 

she’ll quietly fix the wrinkles on your shirt or fiddle with your fingers in her hands while she recounts her adventures out on sea 

she sometimes gets worried she bores you, however the way your eyes light up every time she tells a tale always reassures her otherwise

definitely the type to let you use her claymore if you want to learn 

she’ll provide useful tips as she tucks her hands into your sides gently, positioning you correctly so you don’t hurt yourself 

miss girl is an AMAZING cook 

i just know she cooks the best meals - i mean she’s friends w xiangling after all 

whenever she comes home from a voyage she’ll always insist on making something for you even if she’s abt to pass out 

pls tuck her into bed and promise her that she can make you something in the morning <3 the poor woman needs rest 

brings you back trinkets but they’re actually very practical 

she knows you won’t have much use for a simple charm (not that there’s anything wrong w that) but she believes you’ll like something practical more so she might get you a new engraved knife from the most recent place she’s been to 

definitely the type to surprise you when she docks 

i can imagine her anchoring her ship out a little ways from liyue harbor and rowing to the dock in order to make sure you aren’t alerted of her presence (i’m sorry the mental picture this made in my mind is SENDING ME INTO ORBIT but she means well i love you)

will take you to remote spots she’s found in her travels through liyue 

for example - the little heart shaped island and the island quest (?) that you had to use kaeya the bridge maker for in order to get to im sorry i’ll stop w the kaeya slander

she’ll get you seashell bracelets or necklaces idk why but she gives me those vIBES 

they’re super nice ones too, only the highest quality for you 

yes she’s a bruh girl but i also see her as someone who would enjoy intimate moments like watching the sunset or something 

“yo wanna catch the sunset, i heard it looks sick from the jade chamber” said before ahem it yk fell from the sky

kasdjksfashfjsahf yes ofc i would love to catch the sunset w you pls come home luv

anyways, she is a woman i would give the world for 

zhongli

ok gimme a sec i need to get my gentleman mode on 

this man,,, THIS MAN 

everything w him is so soft like your entire eXISTENCE w him could go in a museum it’s that beautiful 

in the morning when he visits you, he always brings you a cup of your favorite tea and a bouquet of glaze lilies he got from madame ping

holds the door for you, pushes the chair out for you, uses a napkin and brushes sauce off your lips when you’re eating - you name something sweet, he’s done it

secretly loves it when you fuss over him 

he doesn’t like to fight but say he encountered a group of hillichurls he couldn’t avoid and promptly defeated them but ended up tearing a part of his tux(?) (is it a tux? i could not tell you)

not that big of a deal, i mean it’s a scratch, he’s a 6,000 year old god, he’s dealt w much worse 

but seeing the worried crease in your brows as you usher him to sit at the table while quickly grabbing antiseptic to clean his wound

“it’s just a scratch, my dear. do not worry i’ve dealt with much worse.”

you quietly protest abt how “yes zhongli, i understand you’re an archon and have gotten worse injuries but i’m worried about infection just please let me take care of you ok? <3″ 

when you say that he feels weird emotions,,, wdym take care of him? 

he’s always taken care of himself or been expected to take care of others as the former ruling deity of liyue so having someone else genuinely worry abt his wellbeing creates a warm feeling in his chest 

he strikes me as the type to knit you something??? idk maybe it’s the grandpa vibes but i headcanon that he would knit you a scarf for the colder weather, it’s cute 

in the privacy of your home, he really likes picking you up

he loves it when you wrap your legs around his middle while he gets up to go do the dishes or smthg 

domesticity go brrrr

if you’re into making flower crowns, he would totally have you on his lap and wordlessly hand you a glaze lily whenever you expectantly hold your hand out while weaving the flowers together 

he expects you to make the crown for yourself but when you place the crown on his head and it fits perfectly while simultaneously tucking a glaze lily behind your ear, he looks at you dumbstruck 

his mouth parts open in awe and it’s quite literally the cutest thing

you’ve broken him 

thinks it’s the sweetest thing - will keep it on his head for the whole day 

he’ll even put it in water before he sleeps so it won’t wilt and he can wear it the next day <3 

scenic picnics!! scenic picnics!! 

the type to take you to the nicest spots in liyue to chat abt the history of the land w you over a cup of tea and your favorite food (whatever you like, he doesn’t mind)

recounts the people he’s met in his long life before finishing off by saying you’re by far the best person he’s met 

zhongli strangles lovingly come home soon 

thanks for reading! if you have any requests don’t hesitate to send them in <3 

[idealisticrealism]

Hey @igetthebag! Firstly, no need to apologise about your English! If I tried to write something like this in my second language I would probably sound like an 8 year old lol. Secondly, thank you so much for the compliment on my writing talent (that means a lot, seriously) and for suggesting that I could be Miranda K haha! Man, I would be absolutely living the dream if I could be a showrunner like her.

Honestly though I know my positivity for the show/S2 isn't the typical reaction that a lot of fans have had; I think part of it was that I fell so hard for S1 that I went into S2 already very prepared to love it even if it didn't give me everything I wanted, but also as you probably noticed in my recaps (I'm honoured that you went to the effort of reading them all btw, I know that must have taken quite a while!! haha) I very much tend to look at canon and come to my own conclusions about why certain things happened or why characters behaved the way they did. I completely respect that you didn't think S2 was done well and that you were disappointed by it (everyone has a right to their own opinion, and yours is absolutely a fair one!), but I do still stand by my opinion that S2 was overall well-written and had good character development. There certainly were some plotlines that were rushed, but I think it would be hard to avoid that when you have just 12 episodes to fit everything into.

Like yes, Marco's death was surprisingly sudden, but tbh I really doubt there was much more of an interesting story to be told with him alive- probably just more of the same of him being a shouty asshole lol- and I felt that his death created an engaging new plotline for the season with Thony now needing to cover it up and protect Chris. (Ngl I was personally very happy to see Marco gotten rid of, especially because Thony couldn't legally divorce him, so as long as he was alive he'd always be a problem for her plan to stay in Vegas with Fi and the kids, and therefore for the show's entire premise). Kamdar was certainly an odd and eccentric character, and there were moments I did want to roll my eyes at the way his dialogue or mannerisms were written, but I did appreciate that they made him feel like a very different villain from Hayak. To me, Kamdar's presence narratively made sense, as the season needed a villain that would create new challenges for the characters- and yes, the writers did keep raising the stakes, but that's kind of the point of a second installment of anything, I think. For example, look at The Hunger Games: the first book is Katniss fighting for her own life in the arena. The second book adds the threat against her loved ones from President Snow, so now she's fighting to save her life AND the lives of everyone she loves. Then in book 3 she becomes the symbol of the rebellion so she's fighting for herself, her loved ones, and the lives of all the citizens of her nation. The stakes always have to get higher to keep people interested, and TCL did that in S2 by making Thony (and Arman) contend with Kamdar, the FBI, and Sin Cara, plus the ever-present Luca situation.

(Yes, I will admit I am getting a bit tired of Luca's illness as a plot device, but I'm also in the medical field so I'm very aware of the fact that as a transplant recipient, this kid will literally never not be dependent on constant medical care to survive. Which means that Luca repeatedly getting sick or needing complex treatments isn't lazy or repetitive writing, it's accurate writing, as is the way Thony reacts as the mother of a seriously ill child. Luca has been her entire world for over 6 years so of course practically everything she does and thinks about will revolve around him).

Speaking of which, I feel like the whole point of this season was to show that Thony, while the hero of this story, isn't actually a superhero; she's just human, just a woman in a shitty situation who is doing her best while in a constant state of fear and exhaustion. And so, like any human- especially one under extreme duress- she can have the best of intentions but still make mistakes and bad decisions. In her case, these usually arise from her trying to do everything alone, or her not being willing to give up control and trust in others where Luca's safety is concerned, which is is extremely accurate to her character's history and personality. Which means she's not trying to betray Arman or anyone else, she's just so caught up in her own terror that she sometimes makes bad calls. (For example, she never chose protecting Kamdar over Arman; she chose the course of action that she believed had the highest chance of keeping Luca alive, and then took measures to protect Arman as well, knowing he was at risk. You might notice that when Luca isn't involved, she is willing to give up complete control and just trust Arman's judgement even when it goes against her instincts or morals, like with the plan in 1x10 or selling the drugs in 2x05, but when Luca's safety comes into the equation she simply can't break free of the tunnel vision that comes from her Mama Bear mode, and hand over control to someone else.)

But honestly, good luck finding a character in this show that doesn't make bad calls or unintentionally screw others over; they literally all do, but we're just so much more aware of Thony's mistakes because she's who our focus is on. Her decisions, and the consequences of those decisions, are literally the plot of the show. In S1 she generally got lucky and things mostly worked out for her, and plus the writers' goal was to make us love her and become invested in her so that we'd continue to watch, so her mistakes were kept to a minimum (1x09 stands out as one where she really messed up through her own impatience and stubbornness and refusal to listen, and I think it was deliberate that the writers waited til almost the end of the season to really show that part of her). In S2 her luck definitely ran out and she started truly facing the consequences, and it's important to recognise that some of those were the consequences from her actions in S1 which she had simply managed to outrun thus far, but which finally caught up with her. If you'll excuse my language, this season was the 'find out' part of 'fuck around and find out' lol. Thony has made a string of decisions since 1x01, and as a result she or the people she cares about often ended up in even more danger than the situation she was trying to escape from, leading her to then take steps to escape that situation, often to only end up in even worse trouble again. (eg, she tries to sneak back into the US in 1x09 and gets caught and arrested; so then she has to get Arman to help her take down Hayak with the FBI, landing Arman in jail; then Arman has to go into debt to get out of jail before he's murdered; they start selling the drugs to get Arman out of debt to Kamdar before Kamdar destroys him; they get caught by the FBI and forced to set up a sting to take down Cortes and Kamdar; Sin Cara discovers their drug smuggling and nearly kills them; Kamdar nearly kills Thony and does kill Garrett; Arman ends up dead and Thony ends up with a price on her head from Sin Cara, etc etc etc). Basically, what I'm saying is that all through S2 Thony is continually trying to save herself and her loved ones (just like she did in S1) but this time shit just keeps going wrong, because that's what happens when you take risks and mess with dangerous people. And aside from Marco's death, pretty much all the worst stuff happened right near the end of S2, so I expect that much of season 3 is going to be about the impact of those events on her and how she finds her way back from there.

As for Armony; I get it. Having so many barriers between them sucked, but given that literally all of the stressful, terrible events of S2 happened over a period of less than 50 days, her not having the time to focus on her love life seemed pretty realistic to me, especially when the man she was in love with was dealing with significant problems of his own, and had also been unwillingly re-chained to his wife (who I agree deserves better, and should have left him sooner!!) by circumstances outside of his control. Their reunion in 2x03 was disappointing in some ways, yes, but I mean... well, firstly, her husband's funeral had been only days before, and secondly, they met in Nadia's workplace, in front of all her staff... of course they're not going to act like anything more than coworkers in that situation? Thony and Arman have literally never interacted in a visibly intimate way in the club when anyone else was present. I think their reunion might have looked different if it had happened somewhere else, but even then... where would that have been? Even at her house it would have been super inappropriate to show any kind of intimacy given Marco's death, and with his family being right there. If I had my way, Armony would have met somewhere else more private like the clinic, and they would have had a looong hug for sure lol- though nothing more than that, because again, the circumstances were too complicated. But regardless, don't forget that only 3 days after their very reserved reunion, Arman literally dropped everything (despite the threat of Kamdar) to go help Thony, including killing a man for her. 2x04 was an incredible Armony ep and I will defend it to my grave lol. Imo S2 really did give us some great Armony content and really strengthened the bond between them, but with everything going on, it was not exactly the ideal conditions for the two of them to be making out or to fall into bed together. (If you want to cry, think of it this way: they thought they had time. They thought that there would be an after, a calm place where they could reunite once they were free of the threats they faced. They didn't know they would never get that.) But ugh. Anyway. I'll admit that I'm sad they never got to be together physically and have that special moment that they deserved, but we still got so many other amazing scenes that truly showed the depth of their love and devotion for each other, and to me that was far more important. You mentioned 2x08 where Thony suggested the reconciliation- the suggestion did make sense because if Arman got close to Nadia again, he could get access to the keycard; and yeah, of course there were absolutely other ways this could have been achieved, but the writers were clearly going for the angstiest option lol, and the one that would create the most interesting drama and character conflict. And I don't think Thony was specifically telling him to go sleep with her, but it was fairly mutually understood that that would probably happen as part of him and Nadia getting back together. As for Arman's "I don't know" lol, I didn't see that as him being genuinely unsure; to me, it was meant to be understood by the viewers that he was straight-up lying. He knew he loved Thony, but he also knew that telling Nadia he loved Thony would get him kicked out of the house without the keycard, and so he said what he needed to say and did what he needed to do. I fully respect your right to interpret Arman however you want but personally I will forever stand by the opinion that he fell in love with Thony in S1 and he 100% knew it by the time 1x10 happened.

Anyway oops this is getting huge again, so just a few other quick things: I don't think Jazz actually knows the truth about Chris and Marco? I don't think anyone has told her. And yes Garrett 'cleaned up' the Marco situation in 2x07 by giving Thony (who the cops think killed Marco) FBI protection. In canon time, that only happens 2 weeks before the end of the season, and Garrett dies within a week of that. So it is possible that the cops might come after Thony again for Marco's murder in S3 now that Garrett is gone, but it also might be a plotline that is considered finished by the writers because the cops can't interfere with FBI business and so Thony is considered immune in the case of Marco's death. Who knows. Tbh I more wonder about how in 1x09 Homeland Security told her they were going to deport her after she faced trial, and then they just completely disappeared, presumably because she assisted the FBI with taking down Hayak? Her connection with Garrett was a literal get-out-of-jail-free card on multiple occasions so it's going to be so interesting to see her navigate S3 without him and his protection (and especially now that she's without Arman as well).

I guess that that's where the new guys come in though (ugh), and yeah you're right that both Jorge and this other new guy do sound like they will be interested in Thony romantically. I hated that they described the 2nd guy as having an 'instant connection' with her ugh. But honestly maybe the fact that Thony has recently lost everyone she relies on means that she finds herself more vulnerable to actually trusting someone new because she is just so desperate not to be so totally alone, and that's where her friendship(?) with this 2nd guy comes in. It's funny bc I think I already hate him more than I hate Jorge probably because Jorge is at least upfront about being a bad guy whereas it sounds like this other one tricks her. But anyway hopefully Thony doesn't take long to realise that she doesn't need these guys because she does actually still have someone she can turn to: Nadia. Through the series they have had elements of being rivals or adversaries, but they have also been kind to each other and helped each other in the past, and so like I said, in the future I really hope they will become reluctant allies bonded by the loss of Arman and everything they've gone through. In my mind, Thony will make every effort to protect Nadia like she's her own family now that Arman is gone, because she knows it's what he would have wanted... but that might just be wishful thinking.

Anyway I'm not entirely sure if I answered everything but I figure I've already said more than enough words so I'm going to stop there haha 😅

Thanks again for sharing your thoughts!

Well, I'm glad I've reached a point where I can watch this and actually feel eager to have the show back, and interested about what's going to happen next... but I don't know, some of the latest info about all these new characters etc is making me feel weird all over again.

Literally from the moment I started watching this show in S1, I just always assumed it would be, at most, a 3 season show-- and then after losing Adan, I was so sure that they meant to complete the story with this season and let it end there. I want it to end there. I want the resolution of Arman's arc and the culmination of Thony's to stop at the same place, because if the show continues on (like some of Miranda Kwok's recent comments make it feel like is their plan) then it will mean that Arman is left behind. That he was only a temporary part of the story, and not laced throughout it from start to finish-- because even despite his death this season, I feel sure that he is still going to very much be a part of its story, as central to the events of the season and as vital to Thony's arc as Fiona is. But if they're going for a season 4 or even beyond, the plot will move on without him, and I just don't know if I could face that, not when he (and his connection with Thony) was the very thing that drew me to the show in the first place.

Anyway, if you have thoughts, I'd like to hear them; honestly I'd like any chance to talk about this show, to speculate like we used to, because I think it's the only thing that's going to make this coming season any easier to bear.

[ry0chann]

i wasn’t that thirsty for oda until i read ur writing for him and WHEWWW. *fans self* u are too good at this. could u possibly write a piece where oda takes y/n’s virginity and y/n has a praise kink?? 👉👈

haha thank you!! 🥰 and yes i can

a lesson in something new

pairing // Odasaku Sakunosuke x fem!reader

genre // smut

wc. // 4056

warnings // ⚠️ nsfw!! , college au, teacher/student relationship, slight public sex (ig?), fingering (f), vaginal penetration, virgin!reader, loss of virginity

notes // goodbye there's so much plot, why am i like this? i could've just made it pwp but nooo, i just had to give context smh.. it’s still good imo tho. also, the praise kink part is very very subtle- i just didn't want it to be too dialogue heavy

(tagging @nameless-shrimp bc she very kindly read this before it was even close to being complete. i appreciate the feedback, ty shrimp <3)

Sitting in his class was always difficult. His stare was so gentle but it intimidated you; it made you nervous. Every time his eyes landed on you it gave you butterflies. The fact that you could never tell what he was thinking is what had you on edge. Of course, he was oblivious to that at first, but he soon started to catch on. He’d begun to notice how you squirm in your seat whenever he looked at you, and he’d see how flushed your cheeks got whenever he called your name. He assumed you were just shy— and while that may have been part of the reason, that wasn’t all of it.

You would sit through his long lectures, trying your best to pay attention but finding yourself unsuccessful. You’d get distracted so easily; eyes glazing over his toned body and heart quickening at the thoughts that flooded your mind. He was all you ever thought about, and that shouldn’t have been the case. It was wrong of you to think of your professor in a way that was unprofessional, but you couldn’t help it. You couldn’t help but imagine what it would be like to have him touch you, or kiss you. To have him do all the things you do to yourself at night.

The only thing that made this situation wrong was the fact that he was your teacher, unfortunately. He was only a handful of years older than you, and you knew he was experienced- with looks like that there was no way he wasn't. Luckily for you he wasn't tied down to a relationship either, or at least you assumed he wasn't; he wore no ring and never mentioned anything about having a partner. Maybe he just preferred to keep his private life to himself- rightfully so- but that didn't matter to you. It was ridiculous how desperate he made you feel. How badly you wished for him to be the one to take your innocence; a slightly older and experienced man who you knew would treat you right.

Of course, it was sinful of you to attempt to get that kind of attention from him, but it couldn't hurt to try right? Sure, he'd probably deny you, but you wanted him to at least know how you felt. It was parlous, you knew this, yet here you were; sitting before him in the front row of the large and empty classroom, as he sits at his desk and catches you up on the book you've been reading.

He taught literature, which happened to be your easiest subject. But for the sake of getting some alone time with him, you'd pretend to be behind on the reading. This behavior would be seen as unacceptable coming from you. You've always done well in class; keeping up with assignments and never missing a due date. So why were you suddenly slacking? It was suspicious, to say the least, and just as you feared, he'd question you for it.

"Hopefully that was enough to catch you up. Be sure to do tonight's assignment."

Odasaku let out a sigh as you rose to your feet. You fix your skirt and get ready to leave- though, you're stalling and taking your sweet time doing so. Slowly, you walk passed his desk towards the door, but his words stop you.

"One question, if you don't mind. What was the reason you got behind? You're normally so studious."

You contemplated coming up with a lie, but you assumed his question was rhetorical, so you just came out with it.

You laugh a little, cheeks turning a bit pink, "I um, I'm actually not behind on the reading..."

He chuckles softly, looking down at his desk before his eyes come back up to meet yours. "I figured. And what was the reason you felt the need to waste your own time by listening to me talk for an extra thirty minutes?"

He spoke monotonically yet he sounded stern. The urge to give him the truth was very strong, but was it really smart to tell him what you really came for? Were you even bold enough to do such a thing?

"I simply stayed to talk to you. I just felt I needed a reason."

Perhaps you were.

He tilted his head in question, "Did you now? Hm." He thought a moment, then spoke again. "You don't need a reason y/n. I'll always be here."

Odasaku gave you a small smile; a smile that you rarely ever seemed to see, but one that quickened the beating of your heart.

"I appreciate that, thank you." you say quietly.

You knew his offer was on the table for every one of his students, but you selfishly had the thought that it was exclusive for you. You stood there fiddling with your fingers, trying to find any excuse to stay a few minutes longer. Oda gave you a look- a concerned one- and asked if everything was alright. You simply nod your head and begin to walk out but he tells you to wait. As if your legs had a mind of their own, you turn around to face him; he was still sat at his desk and he gestured for you to come over.

"You look unsatisfied. Are you sure you're okay?" his tone was flat but you knew it was genuine.

He looked at you with kind eyes, despite his stoic expression. It was a look that implied you could tell him anything, and you wanted to. You wanted to tell him why you were here, but you also didn't want to make a fool of yourself. The dilemma bounced around in your head and it sparked your anxiety. To avoid his worry, you move to stand in front of his desk. His eyes run over your body- it was most likely an innocent stare, though, you hoped it wasn't.

"Yeah, I'm okay," you say quietly, trailing your fingers across the edge of his desk delicately. "But... I guess you could say I'm unsatisfied."

You really were bold, huh?

He sighs, "Is there something you're not understanding that you're not telling me?"

Oda was oblivious, though you guessed it wasn't entirely obvious what you could've meant. There seemed to be small rush of confidence running through you now, and you weren't sure why. That probably wouldn't bode well for you, however, you could tell you piqued his interest. Nervously, you toy with the hem of your skirt, immediately feeling that confidence fade.

"There's just been something on my mind and... It's related to you."

He raises his eyebrows- still unsure of what you were implying- and his cheeks wear a very light blush. He clears his throat and straightens his back, "Does it have something to do with my teaching? I try to make the material digestible."

"No, you're teaching is fine Sir." you laugh. "Um, but I do wish you would teach me something..." Your words were so vague, and you knew he probably wouldn't catch on unless you spelled it out for him.

With your heart beating out of your chest now, face hot and red, and butterflies flooding your stomach, you lean down to be directly at his eye level. Your palms rest atop his desk and your eyes are glued to his. The words you wanted to say struggled to come out- of course they did; you weren't really gonna confess your love to your professor, were you? It was too late to back out now and you were already here, might as well get it over with.

"I just, um... I'm quite fond of you professor. I know I'm wasting my time telling you this, but I can't keep it from you anymore. And... I've always had this favor I wanted to ask of you, however, it'd be wrong of me to ask."

Your face was as bright as a tomato and you felt like you'd drop dead from the anxiety any minute now. You shake your head and whisper an apology before quickly making your way back towards the door. The regret had set in much sooner than you thought it would. Odasaku rose to his feet and called your name, the sound of him doing so making your heart drop to your stomach. As to not be rude, you turn back around but you hang your head low- like a puppy who had gotten in trouble. He walked over to you and placed a finger under your chin, lifting your head so you'd look at him.

"I can't say I'm too surprised... I see the way you look at me y/n."

His eyes scanned over your face, lingering on your lips before meeting your gaze.

"I'm flattered, to say the least" he says, "However..." He steps a little closer and his voice drops to a whisper, "You know it'd be unprofessional of me to speak on the matter."

His hand falls back down to his side, and you nod knowingly. Of course he wasn't gonna say anything about what you had said, you knew better than to expect him to. Yet, you still hoped he would. You let out a tired sigh followed by another apology, diverting your attention. Odasaku's eyes never leave you- it was like he was observing you; trying to read your expression.

"You said there was a favor you wanted to ask? Do you mind telling me what that favor is?"

Something was telling you he already knew- or at least had an idea of- what the favor was. The red of your cheeks couldn't have been more prominent and you were sure he could hear the beating of your heart.

"It's um... not very professional, Sir." Your voice trails off out of embarrassment.

His eyes widen but it's a subtle reaction. He crosses his arms, a sly smirk coming across his face.

"Is it? That's not very like you y/n. I'm a little disappointed; I wouldn't have thought you would think of me in such a way."

You turn your head from him and speak with an inaudible tone, "I'm sorry Sir."

You felt ashamed, and humiliated. All of this for him to scold you, and for you to leave feeling like your heart had been stomped on. What did you expect? Odasaku leans forward a tad, dropping his voice to a whisper- you could nearly feel his breath on your neck as you keep your head turned.

"I remember asking you what the favor was. I'd still like to know." he says.

The flush of your cheeks deepen. Your breathes hitch and you gulp, trying to find the courage to tell him what you want.

"I-I um... I'd like a kiss..." you whisper, embarrassed.

He chuckles, "That's all? Hm."

No that wasn't all, but how could you bring yourself to tell him what you really wanted? Slowly you turn your head to look at him- his face is closer than you thought it'd be and he wears a devious smirk. Your eyes dart between his eyes and his lips, finding it difficult to maintain eye contact or say anything.

"I could lose my job y'know, if someone found out about this. But..." he pauses, "I'd hate to see you leave here upset."

Your heart quickens and you swear you felt faint. He wasn't offering to give you what you asked for, was he? You fidget with your fingers, nervously mumbling "um's" as you try to form a sentence. Shockingly, his hand found your cheek, softly caressing it with his thumb.

"Is this alright?" he asks politely.

You nod, still speechless.

Oda gives you a kind smile and closes the gap between you. As soon as it started it had ended; a peck to your lips so quick that you couldn't even process it, or savor it. He knew what he was doing- what a tease. You pout a little, feeling disappointed that that was all he gave you. His eyes linger on your lips before he speaks.

"Did that satisfy you, y/n?"

He knew it didn't but of course he'd ask anyway. You shake your head, chewing your lower lip in attempts to calm your nerves. A smile comes across his face at your response.

"I really shouldn't give you another..."

He pecks your lips again.

"Y/n... Tell me to stop." he whispers close to your mouth.

You know you should, but you couldn't bring yourself to. You didn't want him to stop, and the fact that he was telling you to do so indicated that he didn't want to stop either. At this point, he didn't even need to say that he shared your feelings; it was obvious to you now he did feel something for you.

"I- I don't want you to stop." Your voice is so quiet you thought he may not hear you.

Odasaku instinctively took hold of your waist, leaning in again and kissing you once more. Time seemed to stop and your head felt fuzzy. You did have questions about how he truly felt, but right now they didn't even seem worth asking, you just wanted this to continue.

The kiss had become heated faster than you expected. Before you could pull away to say something, he had your hips pressed against the edge of his desk while he kissed you more eagerly. Your hands run across his chest, messing with the buttons of his shirt. You feel him smile against your mouth before he slips his tongue in, a soft whimper escaping you in response.

Words couldn't describe how you felt right now. The best you could do was "elated, aroused," and "nervous." There were so many things jumping around in your head, yet it all seemed clouded by the feeling of his tongue in your mouth and his hands roaming your body.

Odasaku brought his hands under your arms, lifting you up and setting you on his desk. His lips kissed at your jaw, lower and lower, until arriving at the base of your neck. He started to suck at your skin, dragging his hands down your body and up your thighs. His hands were quite big, yet his touch was so gentle- it gave you goosebumps. Your breath hitched at every little touch, you finding yourself to be extremely sensitive.

It was almost embarrassing how wet you already were. You'd squirm beneath his touch, sighing when his hands inched up your legs. Oda had left a few marks on your neck, marks that you'd definitely have to cover with make up if you didn't want anyone to question you about them. His fingers lightly brushed against your clothed sex, causing you to close your legs a bit. He smirked, parting your thighs and pushing your skirt up.

"This is what you want, yes? You can tell me stop at any time, y/n." he says kindly.

You bite your lip with a nod, "I do want this... I'm just... nervous."

Your cheeks had become darker than they already were and you felt more anxious than you did previously. He gives your lips a tender peck, speaking close to them when he pulls away.

"Nervous because of me, or nervous because of something else?"

"Something else..." you exclaim quietly.

"Hm." He backs away almost knowingly. "We can stop if you're not ready."

With widen eyes, you straight your back. It wasn't ending already, was it? Damn him for being so considerate.

"N-no, I'm okay. I promise." your eyes fall to the floor, and your voice gets quiet again when you realize how accidentally loud you had gotten. "Please keep going."

He licks his lips with a grin, trailing his hands back up your thighs and leaning in to kiss you. You tilt your chin up, deepening the kiss, as a form of reassurance that you were alright with continuing. His tongue slips into your mouth again, a little more eager this time. You shiver when his fingers graze the waistband of your panties. Feeling eager yourself, you prop yourself up on your elbows and lift your hips. He removes your panties, letting them fall to the floor.

Oda's fingers press onto your exposed clit, feeling how swollen it had become. He smirks at how your body twitches, and starts to rub circles into your hardened nub. You whimper, closing your eyes as your head falls back. His slender digits slide through the slick of your folds, the pads of his fingers teasing your cunt which was already dripping for him. He admires you a moment, drinking in how pleased you already are.

Without warning, Oda slipped in a finger, a high-pitched moan coming from your mouth when he does so. Your head rises to look at him, your stare meeting his admirable one. His eyes seemed to glimmer with desire, fixating on your flushed face. He uses his thumb to play with your clit as he inserts another finger. They slide in so easily, the feeling of them inside you only making you wetter.

"You're much naughtier than I would've expected, y/n." he shakes his head. "Letting me do such a vulgar thing to you..."

His teasing tone turned you on, in spite of the slight humiliation you felt from being called out. You sit up straight- bringing your arms over his shoulders and catching him in a kiss- as his fingers continue moving in and out of you at a steady pace. He groans into your mouth, quickening his pace slightly.

It was difficult trying to keep still, his fingers felt so good. The amount of times you've zoned out in class because you were thinking about this specific scenario was ridiculous, and the fact that it was actually happening had you over the moon.

He'd curl his fingers in your warmth, moaning into the sloppy kiss you were caught up in. His lips fell from yours and moved to your ear, his hot breath tickling your skin when he spoke.

"Do you think you can take more than this? I just don't want to overwhelm you."

You let out a pleasured sigh; his fingers were still twisting in and out of your cunt. Trying to respond to his question wasn't the easiest task.

"P-please Sir, I-I want you so bad..."

Your face was buried in the crook of his neck, tiny kisses being peppered onto his skin. Oda hums with acknowledgement, taking out his fingers and leaving you feeling empty. He wipes them clean on your thigh and separates from you, backing up to undo his slacks. You stare as his pants pool at his feet, your eyes fixating on the bulge beneath his boxers.

There was a slight anxiety running through you, though you hoped it was just an excitement that your brain had mistaken for nervousness. Oda pulls his briefs to the floor, gently grabbing you by the bend of your knees afterwards, and bringing you closer to the edge of the desk. He kisses you reassuringly, almost to help you relax from noticing how you appeared uneasy- for lack of better words.

"Are you ready?" he asks, now kissing along your jaw and lining himself up at your entrance.

You nod, bringing your hands under his arms and up his back, holding onto his shoulders as if to brace yourself. His length slide in easily, which surprised you because you didn't think it would. Despite that, it still hurt a little; you've never had anything more than your fingers, but the stretch felt so indescribably amazing you couldn't do anything but mewl.

He hisses at feeling you clench around him once he's filled you. "Mm you're so tight, fuck-"

Oda held onto your waist, dragging your body a bit closer to his and beginning to buck his hips. Your eyes rolls to the back of your head and you pull on his shirt, a breathy moan slipping your tongue. He moans against your skin, leaving messy kisses on your neck while he picks up his pace. Your legs had wrapped themselves around his body, attempting to close but obviously not succeeding. His deep moans rumbled through your ears, the sound further turning you on and making you wet.

He moved your skirt up a little higher- just so it wasn't in his way- and thrusts a bit harder. His hand was flat on your stomach, the other on your waist, while he ruts into you. Oda decides to lie you on the desk- figuring it'd be more comfortable for you- trailing his hands up your body and holding you right beneath your breasts. Your eyes were shut tight and your hands ran down his back to his chest.

"Good girl~ Y-you're doing such a good job- shit-"

Continuously, he'd praise you; reminding you how well you were taking him, and how good it felt to be inside you. His words of affirmation drove you crazy. You still couldn't believe what was happening. You were lying atop your professors' desk, he who was god knows how many inches deep inside you, and actively stripping you of every last bit of innocence you might've had left.

The noises you let out were bouncing off the walls of his large classroom, filling his ears and making him grunt every time his body snapped with yours. He was making you feel so good, making you feel things you didn't even know you were capable of feeling. The pleasure was like nothing you've ever experienced; your hand was only capable of so much, after all.

Every thought, every fantasy, you've ever had about him was practically unfolding in front of you. You were experiencing it all for real- something you didn't think would ever be possible. Your eyes were glassy and the bright red blush of your cheeks never went away. Oda took your hands in his, pinning them above your head and giving them a firm squeeze.

"Fuck you feel good- Mphm, say my name for me, y/n."

"Aah Oda-" Your voice got caught in your throat, a squeak escaping you mid-sentence from feeling him hit that sweet spot of yours.

He moans your name after hearing his own come from you, thrusting quicker and causing your moans to get louder. You arch your back, cursing through your moans and bucking your hips up, growing more and more antsy the longer this went on. It felt so good you couldn't sit still. You began to whine, your stomach coiling and your walls tightening around his shaft.

"O-oh I'm- fuck- I'm so close, p-please. Please Oda~"

His eyes scan your face, pupils fully dilated from how pretty you looked beneath him. He was getting close too, he was nearly seconds away. A mumbled "c'mon baby" was said before a swear replaced it, his movements becoming harder. Now overwhelmed with pleasure, you cum around his length, not being able to keep yourself from doing so. He bucks his hips a little more, letting you ride out your orgasm, before pulling out and spilling onto your stomach.

Both your breathes were labored, bodies feeling hot and sticky from the sweat that had formed on your skin. You felt so weak all of a sudden, yet you couldn't prevent the smile that spread across your face. Odasaku gives you a kiss, whispering in your ear something about how well you did- you didn't really hear him, honestly. He redresses, then walks to the other side of his desk, grabbing some tissues from a drawer to hand to you.

Oda helps you clean up, and you tiredly slip back into your panties afterwards. You get off the desk, fixing your clothes and standing on slightly wobbly legs. He holds onto your arms, just to keep you steady, and kisses your cheek.

"Don't hesitate reaching out to me if you need any more help, okay?"

You blush, biting your lip. "Yes Sir. I'll be sure to let you know if I need anything."

He gives you one last kiss then lets go you. You grab your bag from the floor and throw it over your shoulder, giving him a small smile as you exit, feeling giddy that you ended up getting exactly what you came here for.