#also never changing my pfp even if it's not animated for most of the people anymore

[soul-teller]

Agree with other anon, to be honest I forgot why I followed you but I don't think I'll ever want to unfollow, I would miss the strawberry on my dashboard blogging about things like Spantom (??) and Gravity Falls

AWWWW 🥺🥺🥺

THANK U SO MUCH.... I also relate to the "forgetting why i followed you in the first place but we're connected now" stuff ehahaha :D suppose that's just the Tumblr ways......

[grizzlytreyu]

Are some RoR/SnV artists aware that they are supporting A proshipper and a tracer?(Beware of Rebjastonia)

TW: mentions of minors being depicted in disturbing scenarios

(Disclaimer:Do not witchhunt or cyberbully ANYONE i mentioned in this post. Also, everything I state in this post is alleged, I am not the government, I am not the law, everything stated in this post is alleged)

Hello, normally you would see fanart for various fandoms but most notably Record of Ragnarok. This post? this is not something I would normally do but I wanted to spread awareness about an artist by the name of Rebjastonia. Some of you may be familiar with this person but if you dont know who Rebjastonia is, she is an artist known for her Record of Ragnarok ocs, especially this one here

This girlie here is Femit, “the 14th valkyrie” and the daughter of Adamas. Ok here is when it gets interesting, “she is the youngest valkyrie, even younger than Göll and she is often hidden.” My problem with Femit is that she doesn’t even look that young at all and second, there are canonly only 13 valks in Record Of Ragnarok, and obviously Göll being the youngest. You cant even add another valkyrie to the story unless if its an au of who were the original valkyries before the ones we all know and love in RoR. (unless if you count Zerofuku from round 6)

MOVING ON TO THE MOST IMPORTANT PARTS

When I scrolled in her profile, I noticed some of her art looked off. Some of you fellow viewers may ask “Caro, is there anything wrong with any of her works” well, the mold grows here….

Take a closer look at this gentleman by the name of Sobek, the egyptian crocodile god…. I dont fucking remember im sorry.

If you look closely, you could even find this oc’s pose familiar. You guessed it, the official render of Adam from the anime.

the two images laid on top of each other

As you can see, the entire posture of the oc and the official render is almost nearly identical but the only difference from the original image is that Sobek’s arm is more closer to his hip.

Here is another example(I am not going to share the name of the original artist for the sole purpose of protecting people’s privacy. Rebjastonia’s may have a few differences but the similarities are still rather uncanny)

WARNING:THE NEXT PART MAY BE DISTURBING FOR SOME VIEWERS

This is the most serious part here. While I was scrolling in her deviant art page, I found something very messed up…… I am not gonna bother sharing the actual image, even if I censor it but I will show you the description and the title of the drawing.

“But Carolina, arent the characters depicted as adults in that image you speak of?” Well, the aging up excuse is a tactic that some NSFW artists and proshippers use to depict minors in nasty situations yet they never change anything at all and thats similar to what was shown in the image Rebjastonia drew.

Take a quick look at Souji and Goll

And here is what was said about them

I know some of you may say “waaaaaaa but they're 1800 years old” yeah, thats the same old excuse that proshippers use but the character’s soul is still inside a child’s body.

In conclusion, if you still want to support Rebjastonia, it’s completely up to you but please think twice and be aware of her actions and the warnings about her stated in this post.

(UPDATE 2/28/24) It comes to my attention that she left the internet, she deleted every single post on her facebook, her deviantart along with a blacked out pfp, but somehow her insta is still up, it just has nothing on there.

[ivi-ivisek]

My first fully rendered drawing in my regular style with ClipStudioPaint and I drew no one else than my sona Ivulka. It's been ages since I drew her fully rendered instead of just doodles so I simply had to draw her and I'm going to use this as an excuse to ramble about her and people here can finally know what on earth is that thing in my pfp

So Ivulka is some kind of a chimera dragon thing. Not sure if she can be concidered as a chimera but her body possess features of other animals such as bat ears mixed with caracal, Luna moth appendages on the wings, reindeer antlers and neck fluff and the rest of her body is a mixture of otter and tree kangaroo. Yeah and she also has a hidden stingray stinger and a kangaroo pouch

She may have mammalian features but she's not a mammal, nor a reptail. Scientifically she'd belong into own class. Maybe something in between...?

Once I made a doodle about her design

If you're wondering, those things under her ears are not feathers. I don't know what it is but I like it c:

Some general info:

Loves wearing hoodies

Listens to music all the time (has MP3 player)

Likes taking photos of critters

Hoarder/collector

Aprox 158 cm high (ears and antlers not included)

Absolute control over water element (liquid, ice, steam, water bending)

invisibility for short periods of time

She's been around since 2016 and she went through changes

The 2016 version is basically a classical feral furry dragon. I drew this before I joined DeviantArt which was 2017. I actually never shared this

The 2017 version is still just a furry dragon but I made her anthro and this was her official introduction when I joined DA. I still like this version even tho its outdated and I like in general how I drew her back then.

In 2018 she was slowly becoming more chimera like.

In 2019 she went through a bigger update. she was still recognizable but I changed her more than the pervios version and this is the version that still holds up to these days. I wanted to give her more specific features and add more things I like and feels more like me. I still love this version and how I drew Ivulka in general.

The 2021 version... this version... not gonna lie I don't like how I drew her. This is my least favorite drawing of her. I don't know what was going on in my head back then but her head looks more canine than otter she's supposed to be. I also don't like the shading but I have an excuse for this. This is from when I started to draw with my tablet and Medibang and I was experimenting with shading.

Then there is this 3 years long gap when I didn't draw Ivulka fully rendered or at least not in full body. Instead I drew a lot of doodles. After I got my tablet and medibang I've been drawing her like crazy

This is only a little of what I drew :>

Anyways, I'm so happy how current version turned out. this 2024 version is definitely my most favorite. <3

[microraptorreactor]

I feel like dumping out my box of OCs like one would do a box of lps so very long post filled with very many doodles ahead!

Reference for my Rainworld oc, Lost! He's an idiot kid I made for one joke but now he lives in my brain. I think I made this reference for him last year? Idk I don't remember. I'm just now realizing that Lost snuck into my V2 characterization lmao.

Elysium art of various ages! Made between 2021-2023 I believe. This is the oc I made before I knew what Ultrakill was and everyone thought I was making an Ultrakill joke. Tbh if it wasn't for the fact that I MADE Elysium and have their early sketches I wouldn't believe they weren't an Ultrakill reference either. Speaking of which, here's some animations from when Elysium was both a quadruped and a model of robot instead of an individual. These were both made for a class in 2021.

VERY old art (2020 I think? I wasn't using my screen tablet yet) that I normally wouldn't include if it weren't for the fact my friends would explode me if I mentioned Elysium and Lost without mentioning Nerve. She was an anxiety-ridden warforged cleric who got tragically sent to the vampire realm. Whenever Nerve comes up in discussion one of my friends brings up how I made him cry with her final speech. I don't remember tf I said lmao.

Art of my His Dark Materials OC, Zurial! Art would have been made 2022 onwards. I made her WAY back in 2019 before Hazbin Hotel even had a pilot but unfortunately now she looks like a Hazbin angel and I feel weird drawing her. Which is really unfortunate because I love her dearly, she's one of my favorite OCs. She's also the only oc I have who I've made a plushie for. Why did my character design have to accidentally look like the works of famous youtube animator Vivian Medrano T-T

(here's her plushie btw. I'm really proud of it lol.)

Here's Niphit, one of my Warframe OCs! Some of y'all might recognize her as my AO3 pfp, but her design has changed since then. The bottom reference sheet is her most recent design. She's kind of conceptually similar to Baeri/Sleet/-31 from SftBT, in terms of hacking shit and having a snout and teeth. Biggest difference is that she is a whole ass hivemind, usually pretty harmless, and also considered pretty young.

Shameless CR:K fanchild OC. Her name is Golden Parmesan Cheese Cookie (Parm or Parmesan for short) and she's also, like, an AI copy of a dead person. Or a dead person's soul trapped inside an eternal simulation? Either way she's got SO many issues. I have a massive chatfic wip from when I decided to try writeing something with her.

Okay I know technically this is a Homestuck OC but I like to say she's a Hiveswap OC. Because I played Hiveswap and loved it but never read Homestuck. Anyways her name is Vintan she's a yellowblood.

Whoa an original character! Yeah this is Corion, they come from my brain. I have a whole story concept about post-apocalyptic robot cowboys (and human cowboys) that I've done a couple doodles from but never written down. Corion serves as a sort of living taxi, guiding or carrying people across the wasteland. They are a secondary protagonist, I don't think I have art of Pike and Amelia, the actual protagonists. One funny fact about this universe is it contains a character named V1 (pronounced Vi, still written as V1) who I can no longer use for obvious reasons.

But yeah! Ramble over! Not anywere near all of them I just wanted to talk about my brain children XD

[arenabreadandbiscuits]

OFFERING COMMISSIONS (Art, Writing, Animations, and MORE) Please Read Full Post If Interested and VOTE

-

Waited a week and maybe a few extra days for this person to pay $50 dollars for this commission (lineart, color, and time) and they haven't yet sooo.. since commissions are a serious thing that I've mentioned time and time and time again here I'm just going to post it and let others enjoy the art since if I'm not getting paid, attention from people who will pay and pay on time are ones I'm reaching out to.

They mentioned wanting to pay with mobile deposit which I mentioned over and over again that I haven't used before and even after I looked into it mentioned that I wasn't comfortable with that method of payment. After waiting I've decided to just move on.

If YOU have the funds, are serious about payment, and happy to help someone trying to heal from their disability while also trying to keep a good head and some money in their pocket in the living situation they are in right now please dm me!

I do art and writing commissions: Art - open to headings, pfps, couple pics, OCS, favorite characters and them x OCS

And writing commissions: Fanfic - OC x OC, OC x cc, cc x reader, reader x OC, smut, angst, fluffy, yandere, etc

My commissions aren't cheap except for lineart but it depends on case. The lowest I'll go for an art commission would be $30 and the lowest I'll go for a writing one would be $5 but the highest I'll go for art is $250 with THIS being an example. (< Hazbin Hotel Banner) And $195 for writing up to 10k words.

Here's the picture of the art I drew but wasn't paid for.

I don't like usually posting the faces but I tried everything for a marker or something to cover it but since it's not working here's the time lapse. Anyway this commission made me want to do more pet commissions are well just for practice so if you want your pet and you drawn and are willing to pay money upfront or midway then my dms are open to you. For the most part I won't post it unless you want me to or unless you're like this person.

Poll for engagement to reach better buyers.

Prices can be debated of course, I'm willing to have prices change depending on what art you want, how much time it takes, and what is included in it. Cases most likely will be unique for certain people and things but as long as we both agree on the price I'm willing to accept anyone. I also wouldn't mind Commissions for smut art (OC x Sebastian Michaelis for example..) but that would probably be extra dollars so yeah.

I've opened animation commissions in the past but no one said anything about them so while these prices may change later at some point I feel pretty okay with the prices here. Imagine paying for smut art but basically animation. They will only be lineart until I grow more comfortable with coloring animations and when I eventually do of course I'll price up for cases to get paid what I deserve for my work. Just be patient with animations since they'll take a couple days to get done I'm sure but you'll absolutely get an amazing piece for commissioning me.

Never send me money unless I say I'm ready for it, with this being said I refuse to be blamed if you don't follow the rules and these many posts I've made for how I take and accept commissions. If you have questions ALWAYS ask them before anything else.

My ONLY Payment methods currently are:

CASHAPP

CHIME

VENMO

ONE

RIA

CURRENT

PayPal is an option too but not one I prefer using really. If you can't use any of these payment methods or refuse to please don't bother here with me. Give space for those who actually want and can help me please and thank you. Also if you are an account that shows up and tells me to DM you with no further information I will be immediately blocking you.

I look forward to hearing from many of you! Just please understand my rules, I'm so tired of explaining them all the time haha.

[papirouge]

Hi!! sorry for the late response, you answered my ask about jpop idols, thannk you so much for such a thoughtful answer!!!

Honestly when i was younger i was really into mostly hello!proyect, so i know that they had literally child groups with berryz and cute, whose younger member was 8 years old! It was pretty creepy how they would make those photobooks with them posing on bikinis as soon as they turned 13 or 14.

I also really loved perfume, it used to be my favorite group, but like you said nakata got lazy and started prioritizing other acts around the level 3 era, and it really got cemented with cosmic explorer, which is when i started to lose interest in them. Their costumes also used to be so good, creative, and designed thoughtfully for each girl, but now its always the same costume except achan gets the longer skirt, kashiyuka the shorter skirt, and nocchi gets the shorts. Even the fabric is visibly cheaper. I feel like the only one who still cares is mikiko as her choreographies are still good.

But i dont know who that artist you mentioned is, but i'm interested in hearing the story 🍵

Japan is EXTREMELY problematic when it comes to child sexualization and the fact that rightoids who are constantly blaming the left for entertaining sexuality degeneracy....have no problem sporting anime pfp/watch anime is everything you need to know about how much of clowns those people are ��� They don't care about child abuse, they just pretend they do to dunk of their political opponents.

They try to cope saying it's "cultural" but Japan is currently recording an increase of sexual crimes, so...why would they defend a culture suspected of increasing sexual assault coming from a country struggling to contain their own sexual predator? 🤔 Also why the "it's cultural" argument shouldn't be used for honor killing and child marriage then ? Oh my bad, it's Muslims so this time we can finally admit it's a problem 🤡

To be fair with Perfume, they've been around since ~20 years now, so it makes sense their concepts are starting to become more rehashed. Nakata is a VERY derivative artist (even when he tried something new after he discovered future bass, he shoved this sound in everything he made around that time, whether it was on his own album 'Digital Native' or Perfume song "If you Wanna" lol.

The concept of them having distinctive outfits (as you said, longer dress/skirt for A-chan it's said that's bc she has wider hips which aren't considered a good feature in Japan, shorter dress/skirt for Kashiyuka, and shorts for Nocchi) goes back to their debut, and I think it's incredible they sticked to it for so long (especially since they also have respective hairstyle code - Nocchi has never been able to have hair longer than her chin for most of her life.... 🥲), but yeah, after so many years.... it's starting to get old. But they're basically idols I don't think doing an イメチェン (= drastic change of style) would be well received...

In the era of streaming, the lowering of budget for music videos is global. Perfume last outstanding MV (great costume + set design + extras on set) was "Cling Cling"... which was released almost 10 years ago🥴 but other Japanese artists had a drastic drop in MV quality, included Ayu Hamasaki (the artist I talked about in my first reply).

She is Japan best selling artist of all times and her "Jewel" MV has been for a while listed in the most expensive music video of all times🥶💎

Ayu story is quite endearing because her dad abandoned her when she was a child and was edging on delinquency before being scouted in a karaoke. She's from an era when random girls were being scouted and producers propelled them into stardom, tho very few of them made it beyond one single (which was initiall the case of Ayu who started... making rap and flopped miserably LOL) but by an odd turn of events, she got another chance where this time she did pop and things eventually took off. What's interesting with Ayu is that despite being marketed as an idol when she debuted, she from the start decided to take control over her music/image/artistry : she wrote all her lyrics, displayed her own (very distinctive) personal style, etc. By her sophomore album, LOVEppears, she endorsed a more daring image and in the following one, Duty, she dropped the cutesy idol thing to become more diva like and confident ...

That's also around the time she started pulling out very disturbing music videos. There are A LOT of them, but I'd say "Ladies Night" is the one who stuck the most with me (which is weird bc the song is pretty positive : celebrating girlhood support)...but the MV is just unnecessary creepy and dark. It starts off cute & goofy...only to become more and more scary & nightmarish 😰 WHY??

Her '(miss) understood' album era is pretty dark tbh ALL the MV of this album have this dark, gloomy energy... Excellent album musically, but with a very dark energy

Thankfully there is "Fairyland" (which was also one of the most expensive MV of that time) to brighten up that energy (but even the MV ends up in some sort of downturn with the photo burning up?)

- Her 'Duty' and 'Party Queen' album booklet + SURREAL MV features full on sex kitten programming (it's interesting that "SURREAL" has subliminals about her -then- hidden relationship with Tomoya Nagase (another popular male entertainer/idol of that time) and has a frenetic vibe which is very reminiscent of hypnosis/trance state. I hate that it's one of my favorite MV of her 😓(the scenery is just soooo pretty). There's a LOT of symbolism here.

- dissociation in "RAINBOW" and "Don't look back" MV

- mind control in "Alterna" and "Marionette"

- "Free & Easy" MV is a gigantic nod to Joan of Arc and apostolic martydom

- transhumanism in "Real Me" MV

Now that music videos don't have the same budget as they did 15-20 years ago, Ayu's MV aren't anywhere near as elaborated as they were before (also her music has gone down to the toilets - she should've retire after her 10 years best of). But it's obvious she sold out to achieve this level of fame and success, therefore she had to shove all these twisted messages in her MV.

[anastacialy]

making my own rambly post so as to not talk over / detract from op in the tags but this is re: my last reblog

i genuinely agree from the white perspective™ which im sure no one wants (but i have felt compelled to say anyway, hence the readmore). i feel that certain parts of the internet, namely the tumblr i grew up on, shamed white people for appropriation to the point that it lost it's original meaning, much like many words on this godforsaken site.

i mean, we can even look to the overuse of words like weaboo and god even TEAboo as if a white american liking media made in the UK is also overstepping some horrible boundary of Stay In Your Lane and On Your Side. fuck you if you like anime attitude. which, by the way, also mixes with transandrophobia even today, the accusations of transmascs "really" being fujioshis and wishing T would make them "an anime boy." te assumption that all transmascs are white which is simply untrue. the casual hatred toward kpop fans as a monolith, the assumption that said fans are all white, the rascism that inevitably follows ("cringe kpop pfp" "that's ME in my pfp!")

years after i made a stupid little lipsync to niki minaj's arguably most popular with little white girls songs, superbass, i suddenly became horrified because, wasn't that appropriation too, in the new definition? wasn't it horrible to have enjoyed that song, wasn't it cringe, didn't that make me a bad person? i guess i have to hide that i like her music. better not say doja cat is one of my favorite artists. better keep that to myself, it's appropriative, right?

it got to the point that my sister, going to a faire that was focused around scottish and irish culture — OUR culture, primarily (save for the classic White Guy™ experience of being 1/78th native american) — HORRIFIED me. that was appropriative, wasn't it? shouldn't we be ashamed? we aren't really scottish, not really irish. maybe our father is, sure, but we weren't raised with the culture. if we aren't already steeped in our culture, then, doesn't that make it bad to want to learn about it?

that thought extends beyond appropriation, beyond this conversation once again. if you aren't already something, then you can't try to be something, that's appropriative, that's cringe, you're a poser.

nevermind that no real goth people seem to be able to come to a consensus on what goth music is, if you don't already listen to the right sort of goth music, you aren't goth, you can't ever be goth, you can't ever learn or change or grow.

nevermind that no real feminist / activist / lgbtqia+ allies can agree on what the perfect set of values are, if you don't already know to be perfect and unlearn every bias ever taught to you and just know what the right way to be an feminist / activist / lgbtqia+ ally, you aren't an ally, can never be an ally, can never learn or change or grow.

and nevermind that no actual people of color can come to a consensus on what is or isn't overstepping into appropriation, (the asoka trend, for instance, also terrified me, wasn't that appropriative? yet actual indian people are saying they love the trend) you have to already know what is appropriative and what isn't, you can't ever learn, or change, or grow.

anyway, that ramble got away from me. i'm trying to unlearn that all, listen to music i like without sticking myself into a box, unashamedly watch anime and kdrama and i could go on, but i've gone on for long enough, so i'll stop talking now. i just think the op in that post hit the nail on the head. that feeling of look but don't touch, keep yourself away, nod like it's a museum and say there's so much culture here. don't buy jewelry or god forbid wear it from the naitive american booth, just nod and keep your distance.

[redpandapirate]

Blog Reboot - Need your opinions

I have not been regularly posting on this blog for a very long time. The reason being that this has always been my Phan Tumblr account and now I'm not involved with either Dan or Phil. Not that I hate them, my interests have just shifted. I expect a lot of you feel the same, I can see it in this blogs follower count as well.

But there are still quite a lot of people following here whereas my personal blog has next to no people and I will never get any discussions going on there.

Sooo let this be your final warning if you want to defollow: I will rebrand this account soon (new name, new pfp etc.). I will mention my former name in the bio afterwards. Not sure how. Since my interests are varied this will not become another main fandom blog, instead it will most likely feature

Personal posts

Funny/Interesting general reblogs

Videogames I'm into (Stardew Valley, Animal Crossing, Sims, Horizon Franchise, the list goes on and on)

Shows I'm into (this changes all the time tbh)

Maybe some Book interests as well but I very much struggle with reading a lot

Art of any kind, love me some good illustrations

I will tag every fandom so you can block it (for spoiler reasons or because you do not like it). I will also tag personal posts with #modtalks like on my personal blog.

Please ALWAYS feel free to reblog and rant in tags, leave a comment or even send an ask. I'm very happy to build up some mutuals on here again.

Now here is where I need your opinions: Since I'm almost certain many of you have moved on to different interests as well, please leave a comment with your current interests or fandoms. It would be very interesting to me if there is some kind of overlap.

[something-tofightfor]

Get to know me?

I was tagged by @cannedsoupsucks​ - but chose to start a new thread so I could hide my answers behind a cut because it’s a lotta questions. Thank you for tagging me - and I loved reading your answers!

1 - Why did you choose your url?

It’s a line from Billy’s speech to the Anvil recruits in season 1 of The Punisher and one of my favorite moments from the series as a whole. I love the way he talks and the way he carries himself and the way he delivered this line just stood out to me. 

In a fortuitous turn of events, it’s also a key theme and a really meaningful line said by Joel in The Last of Us, so as @its-my-little-dumpster-fire​ pointed out to me, it’s a natural progression from one phase of this blog into the next without having to change a damn thing. 

2 - Any side blogs?

..... yes. But it doesn’t get used, and it wasn’t technically meant to be a side blog - it had a purpose in the beginning, and then I lost steam. 

3 - How long have you been on Tumblr?

I created this blog in December of 2018. 

4 - Do you have a queue tag?

No, but sometimes I think about making one, even though I never post with a queue. 

5 - Why did you start your blog in the first place?

I wanted to post He’s Not Here and see what would happen.... and so here we are. 

6 - Why did you choose your icon/pfp?

Because it is me. 

7 - Why did you choose your header?

Because it’s Ezra, and he is one of my favorites and I love the animation. 

8 - What’s your post with the most notes?

My Billy Russo NSFW Alphabet. 

9 - How many mutuals do you have?

I’m not sure. 

10 - How many followers do you have?

2,531 (A follower appreciation event is coming, I SWEAR)

11 - How many people do you follow?

52. But I check in on a lot of people - I just like to keep my dash very streamlined. 

12 - Have you ever made a shitpost?

Constantly. 

13 - How often do you use Tumblr each day?

I’m always logged in on my phone, but I’ve noticed myself scrolling aimlessly less and less... so maybe that’s a good thing?

14 - Did you have a fight/argument with another blog once?

No, but someday I’d like to. There are a few that deserve it. 

15 - How do you feel about “you need to reblog this” posts?

I feel like no one’s gonna tell me what to reblog on my account, so ... 

16 - Do you like tag games?

I think they’re fun - as long as they don’t make people feel like they absolutely have to reply. 

17 - Do you like ask games?

Definitely. I like answering things so that I’m not just another faceless internet account. I’m pretty open, so if you wanna know something, PLEASE feel free. 

18 - Which of your mutuals do you think is Tumblr famous?

Some people on here definitely act like they are, or like they deserve special treatment, but this is literally a shitty ass website - no one on here is actually famous, no matter what they choose to believe. And if they did act like that ... we wouldn’t be mutuals. 

19 - Do you have a crush on a mutual?

No. Because I feel like crushes are secrets and if I like you, you know it. 

Anyone want to play? Please tag me! 

[cathyparrlyn]

The truth behind the politics-notmything drama

TLDR: Charley’s explanation has been proven to be false through clear evidence, her contracting statements with what was found from original authors, and too many coincidental or suspicious points.

There are too many screenshots to all fit in this one post, so we ended up putting only a few on here. For the full post, here is a link to the google doc, you can also read this instead:

As many of you may already know, I have recently made a callout post against Charley (@politics-notmything) for being a plagiarist. She, however, has made an explanation of her side of the story. After lots of careful investigating, I can honestly confirm that Charley is in fact a plagiarist and lied about certain points of the situation.

To start off, I waited to make this post until I was basically 100% sure on whether her explanation was the truth or not. There was much evidence against her. However, a friend of mine decided to check the IP addresses of each of the tumblr blogs she had mentioned (I did not ask them to by the way, they just sent them to me thinking it would help.) They sent me them and it showed that Charley's main account politics-notmything had the same IP address as both the fake wolf1ez account that she claimed to trick her and the fake Nikole account she blamed. I will not, however, be posting her IP address as proof as I personally consider posting that publicly without her consent as doxxing, and I do not wish to harm Charley like that. I never even considered looking at her IP address as I am not comfortable with that nor technologically competent to even remember IP addresses are a thing you can look at. However, I can’t ignore that what my friend showed me is very blatant proof that confirms that Charley has been lying, so I shall mention it, but I refuse to send it to anyone and I have told them to do the same. Please respect that decision.

Some of you may just take my word for it on that. However, for those of you who don’t, here is all the other evidence stacking up against Charley’s story.

First things first, let’s say I didn’t know Charley’s explanation was false. Her explanation was that she plagiarized a friend instead who had plagiarized fics. Charley, in the end, had deceived people and accepted praise from those who were misled to believe that writing was true. Because of that and if her story was true, then she gave a platform to terf (later knowing they were one and continuing to post their work) and her followers had unintentionally supported a terf and plagiarist because of her deception. Now, she may have received credit, but she could've easily said at any point that the fics weren’t actually written by her but by someone else who was anonymous. AO3 even has some features to properly credit others.

The definition of plagiarism is the practice of taking someone else's work or ideas and passing them off as one's own. With this in mind, Charley had plagiarized no matter what, and the fact that she never once told anyone about this co owner and has held conversations with me about how she came up with, wrote, and edited She Used to Be Mine, a plagiarized fic, all by herself is very suspicious.

The proof Charley has been sending is also on invalid sites where you can easily create your own evidence. Everyone already knows and understands the unreliability of google docs with handling fake emails and stuff I presume. As for Snapchat, you can very well change the date. It’s the exact same thing as time traveling in animal crossing, and it’s actually decently known among people. Here is a link to an example of someone altering time on snap chat, followed by the results.

(Results are on the google doc.)

Now some might wonder why would she go through all the trouble of doing that? Well, to create evidence to clear herself. The fact that it was posted quite a bit later, and that she had told people prior to this that she deleted all the messages and proof of information that could blatantly defend herself is very sketchy. Not to mention, the account she @ed as “Nikole” was fake and confirmed to be nonexistent by a friend of mine.

Moreover, the tumblr account that she claimed was Nikoles was recently changed between the two days. When Charley first mentioned the account, me and my friends all investigated it and found a post saying she had another account. However, since then it was altered to say the account Charley @ed and the account had a new bio saying her snap chat is the one Charley @ed. But the account was nonexistent the day before?

Is this simply just a coincidence? Well, let’s see what else is a coincidence.

Charley has recently been writing smut and this blamed blog is an NSFW blog. Coincidence? Maybe. But she also claimed to have cut the person out of her life last year. The blog however is more recently made in late 2020. Why would Charley still be in contact with her accounts? Is this another coincidence? Also, if they did cut things off, why continue to still post her work? And why would two of the fics be things that were made this year if she ended their friendship in 2019? How would she have gotten that from “Nikole” if they were cut off? We even asked the original author of one of the fics about the situation and they confirmed that they gave no permission for someone to copy their fic.

Are these all coincidences too? Not to mention, Charley didn’t say just one person she never mentioned before had tricked her into plagiarism, but two. Charley claimed to be good friends with the author of the original Luck be a Lady and have received permission from them, however, they never spoke to Charley before nor gave permission to anyone to use their fic.

When it was found that the original author of the fic that Luck Be a Lady plagiarized was not friends with Charley nor gave her permission like she had said they did, Charley claimed another account that was fake had tricked her.

Again? How likely is that to even happen once, let alone twice? Or for someone with no post on an account that could have easily been made had even interacted with Charley? Or that the texting style in the evidence she posted is similar to her own and could be edited? And also the conversation itself is way too sketchy and convenient?

(Check google doc or Charley’s post for the conversation.)

Charley also just happened to request help with the title in a group chat l was in with her, but she requested help 3 weeks after the conversation she claims to have happened above.

( @all-my-love-cathy by the way was the one who named it, her name was censored because its her personal account with her name real)

Maybe it's just me, but 3 weeks seems like a bit of a long time to wait to name a fic that already had a storyline and pre-written chapters.

Moreover, the fake Wolf1ez also just so coincidentally happened to recently have copied the Twitter pfp of the account that Charley had seen but not their actual tumblr account? And that this blog that doesn’t make posts decided to tell Charley to use a fic they didn’t write?

How did they even find her blog? And why wouldn’t Charley at least double check the situation here since the person is very suspicious in the conversation they had, had no posts and she doesn’t know them? This is the "close friend" they claimed to have co authored with?

Also, Charley claimed to have commented on the AO3 fic and then deleted it. However, the original author never got an email for this. Whether it’s anonymous or not, they would have seen that a comment was deleted, yet they didn’t have one and all the other comments were fine.

The author even had a note written at latest in January 2020 telling their readers to talk to them on Twitter instead of Tumblr.

Their A/N^

(more screenshots are on the google docs)

Why would she discuss it with them on tumblr then if the author didn’t like tumblr, and Charley does in fact have a Twitter, so why not talk to them there? That’s pretty sketchy.

Also speaking of coincidences, how about the fact that the most recent fic she updated that was confirmed to be plagiarized happened to be the very last fic on the supposed list she claimed to have been given by “Nikole”? Or how she later contradicts herself by saying she won’t upload anymore of her fics? What left did she have to upload if they were all used?

Furthermore, the fic just so happened to also be a Rent fic. Wow, right after Hope Mill Theater released Rent with Millie and Maiya both starring in roles, something Charley had seen and recently expressed great interest in. What a coincidence that it was the one she posted that day. Or how about the other fics that were all copied also being her interests? So many coincidences.

Now I hope it is understood that all of these together just don’t add up. Those are way too many “coincidences” for her explanation to be true. The original authors contacted had never spoken to Charley or given her permission to use their fics, and the accounts she used made no sense with how they were presented. Her explanation feels somewhat of an excuse, and the fact that there is definite proof that she has lied in her explanation and is connected to the accounts is unsettling. Blaming a makeup blog is already messed up, but calling them a terf?

I’m sorry if this post is upsetting to anyone? I know a lot of people have been openly angry or devastated at the news of what has been done. Plagiarism is not okay, neither is deception. To see such a big blog that you might have once admired lie to you and steal from others isn’t easy, especially since she has such a big following that others are dreaming to have. Not to mention, this definitely looks bad for fic writers, especially shippers as she was one of the major faces of Parrlyn. I think it’s important to recognize that we can’t encourage or simply overlook issues like these, nor is it fair to many fans. Please make sure to recognize this issue and become aware about it.

What Charley has done isn’t right, however, that doesn’t deny the fact that she is a human being just like every single one of us. She is very young and did something dumb, but she does not deserve to be sent any hate so please refrain from doing that if you so desired to. I know my blog is known for having issues with her in the past, but I genuinely mean it when I say I hope she learns from this and I don’t want her to be attacked. Nobody deserves to be sent hate, and as a fandom we should strive to be bigger and better people each day and only share positivity and kindness with each other.

Please, once again, give the original fic writers credit if you liked fics that were plagiarized. If you could spare a second to give them a kudos/like and possibly comment something simple like “I love this”, I’m sure it would mean a bunch to them. Hearing your fics were stolen is not easy, speaking from experience here as someone who was also plagiarized this year. They could use a bit of love, so please do consider it if you are comfortable with that.

Once again, I spent the past two days since I read Charley's explanation investigating the situation with a group of people. I just wanted to share the truth, maybe it’s the inner journalist in me. This is what I found with them and what I stand by. Believe what you want, I can’t force ideas onto anyone and I know some are bound to disagree with this, but it’s what I found.

For anyone upset over the incident and needs a place to rant or vent, my dms are open and so is my inbox. If you follow me on insta or are a friend on discord I would recommend those as I am a bit more active there. I’ll try to be on as much as I can the next few days in case anyone needs someone to talk to.

[castawavy]

Check In Tag Game  ✔️

Thankie for tagging me isa! @meriooli I shall answer below the cut!

why did you choose your URL?

I was trying to think of a blog theme that matched Sims Castaways, and then my lovely friend dettea suggested castawavy to me! at the time I was mainly posting my midnight sun legacy so it all matched real nice!

any side blogs?

just my archive blog for my old story @crescendemon-archive 

how long have you been on tumblr?

I’ll answer just for simblr as my old blog was just a reblog blog for anime gifs but I joined simblr I think two years ago now in 2019!

do you have a queue tag

I do not! I find it almost impossible to queue things as I am so impulsive!!

why did you start your blog in the first place?

honestly I was feeling kind of lonely, I was super into sims and wanted to share that interest with other people. I was originally posting on reddit but I found a lot of people in the community to be very well er... anti modding etc. I felt like what people were doing on tumblr was way more interesting, like stories and edits etc.

why did you choose your icon/pfp?

I change it all the time but my current one is from an edit I was really happy with!

why did you choose your header?

also an edit I made for a header! it matches my profile picture

what’s your post with the most notes?

oh hmm I’m not sure I don’t know how to check either but I think it’s this edit ✌

how many mutuals do you have?

145! yep I counted AHAHA

how many followers do you have?

I’m currently at 1919 (no one has ever asked me that before lmao)

how many people do you follow?

211 I try to find new blogs all the time, I mainly follow sim focused ones but idm simblrs that talk a lot about their lives and other interests, idk I like to hear how people are doing, and learn about what people are interested in!

have you ever made a shit post?

so so many I even have a tag for it it’s #mem it’s not funny or anything so please don’t expect much lmao 

how often do you use tumblr each day?

unfortunately this site is my current hyperfixation so I check it constantly, I try not to freak people out though so sometimes I wait an hour to reply to comments but I see them instantly :’) yay for fixations lmao. I need to get out of the habit of this whilst I’m at work tho.

did you have a fight/argument with another blog once?

ooo boy yeah, not by choice though. I learnt my lesson though, I feel like I can see through people being fake way better now! I never want to be involved with anything like that ever again tho. It also taught me to speak up if I ever see any sus discord shit happening, cause I failed to do so a few times and I felt bad about it :/ !!!

how do you feel about ‘you need to reblog this’ posts?

idk what those are!

do you like tag games?

yes! I love being tagged I check all my mentions too and I think tag games are a good way to meet new people!

do you like ask games?

I love them! eespcially character related ones!

do you have a crush on a mutual?

I do not! I don’t really know how that would happen ahaha!?

I will tag: @pixiegal @sinfulwunders @dandelion-healing @virginnotsaint​ @smolteabirb @moonaive​ and @madeofcc​ (I probably forgot some lovely people so if you wanna join in then please please do!)

[celine-song]

tagged by @billy-crudup​ thank u bestie!

tagging @madeline-kahn @saoirse-ronan @chastainjessica @bijespers @rogerdeakinsdp

1: Why did you choose your url?

i watched parasite and was completely blown away so i wanted an url to honor bong joon ho!

2: Any side blogs? if you have them, name them and why you have them.

i have an animal crossing sideblog @hoofhoo and i used to have a roosterteeth sideblog a long time ago but it’s no more

3: How long have you been on tumblr? 

since 2011 i think? ew

4: Do you have a queue tag?

no bc full disclosure my entire blog is on queue so there’s no point having a tag for it. i do it this way bc i usually come on tumblr, reblog a bunch of stuff and then barely go on here throughout the day so i like to space things out

5: Why did you start your blog in the first place?

i saw ppl post gifs from here on another website and talk abt tumblr so i was like sounds fun im gonna try it out. and the people who made gifs on here seemed like gods so i wanted to do it too kjdsvnksdjvn

6: Why did you choose your icon/pfp?

i used to have celebrities as icons but i’m at a point where i have no idea who to even choose so i wanted something neutral and there are a few ppl using icons as pfps so i looked up yellow icons (kajvavn) and found this one and it seemed perfect i love the lil heart and the shape of it

7: Why did you choose your header?

i actually had to go check what my header even is skdvnsjkvn but i watched chungking express for the first time a couple months ago and i wanted to have a somewhat fancy edited header and i chose a screenshot from that movie. i was going to change the movie on my header every month (edited in the same style) but idk maybe i’ll do it every season instead

8: What’s your post with the most notes? 

this is so embarrassing

9: How many mutuals do you have?

i don’t know the exact number but i think most people i follow are mutuals! love ya babes

10: How many followers do you have?

more than i deserve but i think a lot of them are inactive since i’ve been here a long time sdkvnjvn

11: How many people do you follow?

153. doesn’t sound so impressive now that most of them are mutuals huh sdkjvnn

12: Have you ever made a shitposts?

im not sure what qualifies, but i think i made some in the druck fandom

13: How often do you use tumblr each day?

like one or two hours i think? not as much as i used to tbh

14: Did you ever have a fight/argument with another blog once? who won?

not really an argument, i just had ppl argue with me in my askbox but it never escalated to a whole conversation sdjfvnjsk

15: How do you feel about “you need to reblog this” posts?

thanks for the guit trip babes i still won’t reblog unless it’s something i really care about

16: Do you like tag games?

yes but i’m so bad at checking my mentions i do them once in a blue moon sdkfvnsjdf sorry luvs

17: Do you like ask games?

also yes but i don’t get a lot of asks when i do them kdfjvnsk

18. Which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

all of them are legends

19: Do you have a crush on a mutual?

yes i have a crush on my gf 😌

[asuka--langley--soryu]

tagged by: @so1987​  thank you!!!

1. why did you choose your url?

I had just watched nge and wanted an asuka url and this was available lol. I have desperately and deeply wanted the single dash version for literally years but its never been available :// if you are hoarding it then pls know we are mortal enemies on this earth and i can and will fight you for it

2. any side blogs? if you have them, name them and why you have them.

well, first of all, this is a sideblog lol. my main is @paradoxspaces​

I’ve had various sideblogs over the years but at this point the only active one (aside from here) is an mcr/music sideblog @so-ingestible​. Once upon a time I ran @isgeorgehwbushdeadyet which is uhhh obviously now defunct but remains my pride and joy

3. how long have you been on tumblr? jfc since literally 2011 :/ ive seen it all and somehow stuck around which idk is probs in the dsm somewhere

4. do you have a queue tag? Is just ‘q’ right now, but back in the day I did used to have one of those dumb punny ones bc it was The Thing To Do

5. why did you start your blog in the first place? Started this blog bc I’d finished nge and was absolutely out of my mind about it and needed somewhere to vent that lol. Also I’d gotten this URL and it seemed a shame to waste it.

6. why did you choose your icon/pfp? this asuka has been one of my go-to pfps for yeaaars across various platforms. I like how judgemental she looks.

(tho just between you and me i have been thinking of changing it soon so mayhaps watch out for that)

7. why did you choose your header? I like the ‘red sea’ image and it’s not super obtrusive/obnoxious

8. which post of yours has the most notes? I have no idea lol I dont keep track of that. like i said i’ve been here since 2011 and have had multiple sideblogs in that time so is more work than its worth

9. how many mutuals do you have? is there a way to find this out that isn’t literally going through and counting? bc im like. not doing that.

10. how many followers do you have? 10k on here

11. how many people do you follow? 688

12. have you ever made a shitpost? lol yea sure whatever that even means

13. how often do you use tumblr? uh god probs too often? its really the only social media I use tbh

14. did you have a fight/argument with another blog? who won? lol no, not really and especially not at this point. i just.....dont take tumblr seriously enough to muster the kind of energy to get into the maladjusted social thunderdome that goes on here. obvs i have been known to get snippy w anons and post about disagreeing w certain opinions bc i am, at the end of the day, a bitch, but i dont think thats the same thing lol.

however i will say that on my main (and off tumblr as well, unfortunately) circa 2012 I used to throw myself passionately and heroically into the most god awful unholy trenches of the vriscourse bc idk apparently i had nothing better to do back then and thought it was my mission from god to argue w people on reddit. if you know anything about the relationship between any given unmedicated 14 yr old prelesbian meangirl and vriska then you can probably guess how i acted--which is to say like an absolutely rabid fucking animal. 

15. how do you feel about ‘you need to share this’ posts? i ignore any posts longer than two sentences as a general rule

16. do you like tag games? (+) 17. do you like ask games? yes to both!

18. Which one of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous? o christ once again i have no fucking clue. if youre famous lmk

19. do you have a crush on a mutual? nah lol none of you are real

20. tags (no pressure!) o geez i will come back and edit this when im home xoxo

[noxyfied]

This, is Noxy/Noxyfied/Nox. This is the character I identify as online, and I want to tell you my story with this adorable Arctic Fox because it is one heck of a tale from not so long ago

Things did begin rough at the beginning of my persona’s history. I honestly can’t recall how I came up with it, only how I inserted my love for something and went with it.

From the early years of 2017 to 2019 I was all paper and pencil. Ah yes traditional art was my big thing for a couple of years during that era of 2013 to 2020. I had a time where I wrote stories about characters I made, and not much. No fan art, no nothing, I wanted to stick to my own original ideas at first before I took the step to do something that I did not own; it was a weird mindset I know, I couldn’t hold myself to want to be original and develop to be good enough to draw other things.

It took me some time to develop, hell even to this day I still am unsure of my own skills but I enjoyed trying new things. I don’t reject much criticism even if it comes harsh it still lingers in my head when received anyway. I needed someone to identify as online, a persona who I would have an identity through as I was moving forward on this hopeful career I want to make with my art.

Idea #1 draw my own self accurate to how I look 

Scratch that...

Nononono, I am too bad at showing my face, even at that I don’t like myself.

So I had to come up with something else, 2019 was ending with my skills rising up to something neat. I had Fire alpaca and a wacom cheap tablet which I used time to time back then, and with how I moved foward I said “why not, lets draw a glaceon.

Not bad, not bad. I do enjoy anthropomorphic animals, and for a anthro Glaceon it wasn't so bad. Even back then I did not enjoy much of this picture but the idea sparked. I did roleplay around online a lot as a Glaceon. People always had referred to me as a Glaceon when talking, because furry friends tend to be like that and I don’t mind. It had definitely sparked the idea of identifying as one for my persona.

I had a hard time how I would draw this character, a more personalized Glaceon with my own flare of the art style I carry should be nice, should I make it tall? short? anthro? feral? the questions rose up. Even more as time passed, took some time unsure of it, Unluckily I had a Glaceon FURsona, not a persona. (Yes those were two separate things as I carried 7 fursonas as individual characters in their own stories).

But soon one day in class, my artsy self was bored and it just sparked.

This is it! yes! I love it! something about this just clicked for some reason, it was like nothing I had seen before I could not look away at it, this was it.

After class I went home and played some games. The idea was there but man am I tired. Things did go slow, but not for long as of January, the classes I took gave me the ability to better understand this Adobe Photoshop, an amazing tool for editing pictures but also... To draw?!? I have heard of using Photoshop to draw but was amazed to have the ability using such program. During my time 2019 I would doodle around on Photoshop in my school or at home (thanks to the campus giving me a cheaper prize to use it for assignments) Not bad, not bad, the program was for sure something nice to use. Look! I even drew my Fursonas there too, ain’t that nice

2019 was something for sure. It had just begun making 2020 quite the year as I took my wacom tablet, opened Photoshop, and on January there it was.

Oh how cute! I felt so proud of myself, firealpaca was nothing like how clean and pretty Photoshop was, I was amazed at this ability.

“I made this?” that would be what I ask myself everyday. Time to time I would, and still, look at my phone to my drawings and remember what I used to make some pieces, I will not forget how I used thick outlines with the line too from photoshop, added some depth on the eyes. But most importantly, I had a persona, and I introduced it

My friends loved it, I could not believe I am starting to do the shift, my days of traditional art were at a halt. Not at a complete stop since I do use traditional art for a few other things of course, this was just my main focus now.

This little creature was everything to me, cute, easy to make, helped me throughout a few months as I practiced with my digital art.

I also perfected it’s look, but something looked rather familiar about it. Could not put my finger to it, so I went on drawing it.

that was a few exceptions where I shifted the proportions for “it”

“It” “it” what was this thing supposed to be, I myself was unsure how to identify myself with this persona. Male? no, female? no. The issue was there, who am I really inside, who was my persona gonna be.

I still cannot tell you exactly what my persona was for the longest time. I at times felt lost and confused with my identity, it did not help that 2020 did its mumbo jumbo and a pandemic happened, it was a lot of time on my own at home just questioning really who I had been for the longest time. Classes were minimal so my free time was big around April and May.

I was always unsure of who I was exactly, through my early years late 2000′s I had in me that my body was uncomfortable for looking the way it did, 2010′s went silent but there was something in me I did not understand. why did I feel this way, why do I feel as I am not happy with who I am, and who I identify with.

This persona was the wake up call to who I really wanted to be. I saw it in me that I knew being a male was the main issue in me feeling unhappy. Throughout my life I did not enjoy masculinity as much as other kids, yeah I had some boy traits but it was rather minimal, I enjoyed other things more. I enjoyed a lot of things about being female it was something I had never seen before. as hard or confusing things tend to be from me to explain, its a rather hard thing for myself to explain. But that how it felt “confusing” I researched and looked for things and to my conclusion I had come to be, I come to identify as a MtF trans.

I felt relieved in me of it and I already enjoyed my days more after from it. The only issue is “who do I tell..?” I was timid to tell this to anyone, friends or even family. Especially family, those I come to admit they will never be told of what my decision was because of how hard headed they are. It is a tragic story to tell since most families are such closed minded people of rejecting others.

“My friends tho, my friends? I would feel bad if I told them” that was the mindset I had for a while before admitting to them time to time, one by one. This was a chapter in my life that had changed me early 2020′s but I felt a lot of joy in me to be who I wanted to be, I no longer took anyone else's guidance for controlling who I am, I just went with my own flow.

My persona was.... more comically confused, it could be either so I just left it how my mood wanted it to go for when drawing it. So, things went well, in 2019 with the money I got I found myself enjoying a lot of second handed games, with a game coming real soon that had me pumped for I had to get a console I wanted for so long

A PS4 for the the Final fantasy 7 Remake, I was so pumped waiting for the game, I got a used PS4 for it and even bought couple other games for it to get to know the console: Final fantasy 15, destiny, and later on this Persona 5 game a lot of people talked about. Hmm ok, well lets try it out and oh me oh my, a few days later:

The art style captivated me, can you tell I went all out to trying anything with my persona? I cannot believe I was my own guinea pig for these sorts.

Going around some friends and they will tell you that I used this pfp quite a lot back then, as well as updating it with a new oc I had come up with

A tale in due time will be told about this gal.

well, it was set and forth that this was me, my persona, this glaceon was who I was. People loved it, my friends really liked it, and I had a blast having this first pure year of digital art only. Meeting new friends, and admiring their art. Having old friends come back, and even losing a few others on the way. During the time of june, to July I was rapid about drawing my persona in many ways, short, tall, anthro, feral

even metallic.

 But there come some time I did not grew tired of. But a little worried that I had to rely on a franchise for my own identity, of course there is nothing wrong for those doing it. But reflecting on myself, back then when I wanted this art career to happen, I wanted to go all out letting out my imagination  with my own creations. I had to make the decision, it was time to move on...

...To a new art program and new drawing tablet

No, it wasn’t that. I had to branch out from this Glaceon, but keep my identity, my legacy of this persona in check, but with a new coat of paint of course. did not take a long time before choosing that I had to use a real life animal as inspiration for this change. Something at least close to it, ah yes of course! the inspiration of the Glaceon was an arctic fox, well those are some good stepping stones to begin with so what happened one day is that I began sketching, not before saying good bye to this old self that helped me begin. It was weird, this is me but it was old me?

Tested the new Brushes from this amazing program called Clip studio paint, and I gotta say I love the program. Sincerely the best choice I made to leave Photoshop for this.

At last, this is it. the new Me!

Familiar looking isn’t it,baby steps we can say.

I cannot blame the people for calling my new persona a “Glaceon-alike”

I headed to the right direction stepping away from it, but it was hard to let go

new program, new tablet, new me. the later half of 2020 went onto a lot of changes with myself, the chibi small version did not make me happy to make anymore, I was losing the touch and with the few comments I got of looking like a “powerpuff girl look a like” did set me off to do a drastic change I am thankful to do. This new me had some weird phases, don’t we all tho?

where else to brainstorm than back to the traditional old ways. Now, you may see this and ask what was I thinking when making this. the order of when i started and finish goes as: Top right: ok what if it was feral, nah nah scratch. Top left: Can I still make it cute with a round face and features I had from before? ew no! that looks scary Bottom right: lets make it more natural and wow hey! yes yes yes! this looks hundred times better. Bottom left: It is time I go all out and make it humanoid, it was how I found myself enjoying drawing most things but still did some anthropomorphic things. I was just not the best of it.

Back to digital and.... Amazing, I really out did myself this time, lets go for it, lets keep going with this

I even got a cool sword too!

My practice continued from here, the second half was great and fun. New persona got me in a place where I was happy with and through October and December I was having a blast with the more possibilities with it. I went on to practice with even more suggestive things after a life drawing class I took, proportions mattered to me and with this new persona I went out to make more better looking proportions that were attractive and stylish.

This persona was great, and I managed to make so much of it. even Drawing the more suggestive stuff had left me with an answer for this persona. Just make it gender fluid, my selection for this character being male or female made me so tired I did not know why I just made it gender fluid since the beginning. My mood swings for this character, and I can’t resist drawing it either way. Was I finished? of course not, this persona still had some work around to do. The hair became a pain to make to keeping up with  consistently.

2020 ended, with a year of exciting new things coming for this new year. I went through quite a lot in my life and my art career took a shaken with this new digital life style, my persona became the identity I saw myself through, something im happy with drawing to represent Me.

That isn’t to say that I gave up on drawing Me Me.

I drew who I hope to be, and will use this from time to time, nothing fancy but something.

It has been a year already since I began identifying myself with this persona from last year from now. ever since I sketched that doodle in class, it has been a happy trip through memory lane writing it and I am happy how things turned out. 2021 is what I hope to be as good as 2020 was (by that I mean drawing only of course) In 2021 one more change was made that had made me just as happy to continue on with.

I got more hair! as crazy as it is yes. More hair, and a different front style has been to this day what I been using.

I even made a discord emoji for all the warm hugs to have with my fursona!

and my first ever animation I have ever done before!!

I am always experimenting new things, and i’m proud to be an artists to go out there and leave my art out there to be noticed by anyone. The love and appreciation friends and others leave me are the best thing I could ask. I look foward to see what is up ahead, for me, my career, and Noxy.

[anakinnaberrie]

tagged by @bilyrusso​. thank you! :)

1. Why did you choose your url?

because thats his mommy.... also i wanted something sw canon-adjacent so this fits the bill

2. Any side blogs?

my spn cringe is on @presidentbidean and my mostly quiet anime blog is @lyonvastla. i’m considering starting a resource hub too but that would just be me reblogging tutorials that i keep misplacing so i doubt i’d boost the url

3. How long have you been on tumblr?

ten years....

4. Do you have a queue tag?

nope! my blog runs on queue so it would defeat the point. if anything i should make a tag for when im actually online

5. Why did you start your blog?

tragically it was because a fanfic author i really liked had an account and would chat with readers and i was like oh fuck yeah i want in on this. cringe in retrospect

6. Why did you choose your icon/pfp?

well after [redacted] i wanted to disengage with my ah themed blog header/icon/sidebar asap so i very quickly whipped one up with ahsoka because i was watching clone wars at the time. i keep telling myself today is the day i’ll change it and yet

7. Why did you choose your header?

again, had to rebrand on a short turn around, and its just a very nice moment from the episode. also its blue so my icon kinda matches

8. What post of yours has the most notes?

unfortunately it is this freeboot of the rt podcast which isn’t even something i made, i just trimmed the video in movie maker. however as for edits it’s this

9. How many mutuals do you have?

literally no idea. at least 5.

10. How many followers do you have?

2732

11. How many blogs do you follow?

527, but in my defense i’d say 300 are entirely inactive accounts i simply am too lazy to go unfollow

12. Have you ever made a shit post?

oh for sure

13. How often do use Tumblr a day?

depending on my busy to boredom level it is anywhere from two quick activity/tags checks in the morning and before bed to mindless hours of scrolling

14. Did you ever have a fight/argument with another blog?

it was all on anon but. yes probably several people. truly i had a big storm coming

15. How do you feel about ‘you need to reblog’ posts?

i ignore all of those mostly unless its a reblog gifmakers post which i will occasionally reblog. i am indifferent i simply don’t reblog many text posts

16. Do you like tag games?

yeah! theyre fun

17. Do you like ask games?

sure! i really don’t reblog many though because im normally never on

18. Which of your mutuals do you think is Tumblr famous?

they are most definitely all more famous than me. however ret has been having a viral tumblr post about once a week so we will go with them

19. Do you have a crush on a mutual?

i do not. its not you all, it’s me

tagging anyone who’s interested!

[unravelling-the-world]

random thoughts related to kagepro (tw for depression?? death?? suicide ?? implied ?? im not sure and idk what else read at ur own risk)

well idk lately ive been thinking a lot and ik ive uh always (? since i can remember?) have been depressed (i mean...it started around age 12...i dont really remember much before that. most of what i remember are bad moments anyways. or very specific scenes. but they dont feel mine. if that makes sense. its like remembering the scene from a movie.  back on track i guess idk well lately ive realized i actually kin some characters and lately ive...been relating a lot to shintaro kisaragi fromkagepro. i mean its ok. there´s always been that specific similarity in us (after all, how many characters in anime are as related to coca cola as shintaro //and me,,im literally a coca cola addict lmao// well anyways. after some days, this lead me to thinking...to a hidden memory within my brain, i guess. I remember introducing my then best friends, to kagepro. one told me haha he´s like u bc the coca cola!! and i think i just laughed and smiled? i truly didn´t see it? i was sad sure, but i couldnt really relate to him. after all, i was the leader of my own little group of 12 year old weebs,right? (i was also 12 btw) i didnt personally dislike shintaro but i didnt rly see myself in him yknow? also i have loved ayano from ever since i have memory so idk like she´s one of my biggest comfort characters and its weird bc if she was ´´real´´ idk if i could date her or anything but im just glad she exists bc it somehow comforts me a lot yeah anyways ayano essay for another time lol. anyways at this age my favorite characters in kagepro were ayano and konoha ( i still love them a lot) thing is, at this point in my life i didnt know/wasnt aware i was transgender but i already kinda liked he/him pronouns so i roleplayed a lot. online. i roleplayed as konoha obviously lmao and actually one of my irl friends related to shintaro ?? and i think we may have roleplayed lmao and stuff.... she even had a facebook account named shin hikkikomori or smth like that. anyways fast forward bc after being 12 a lot of stuff happened obviously. and none of that relates to kagepro until quite some time. i will mention some items that dont really relate to kagepro but marked moments in my friend group that may be relevant later on. Around 2016)? Some of my closest friends changed schools (but we kept contact) yet i still had a big group at school. But it got fragmented along the way. 2017 i went to Japan and formed a new, different friend group with people that even today, are dear to me. When i came back, my friend group fragmented more. I kept contact with other members of the old group but one on one, not as a group anymore. 2018 we graduated, and i broke up my realtionship with one of my former best friends (2016-2018) 2019 was a year of change, and even though i was afraid and shit got weird, i was not doing too bad. i will skip that. Well. Im sure we all know 2020 was a trainwreck, shit happened. i had a villain arc. I lost my shit,definetely. Ups, downs, whatever. 2021 has not been too different. However, even through everything, in early 2020, i kept close relationships with my friend group. as the year moved forward and the restrictions started lifting ( thank you government very cool <3 //ironically obviously, this is the reason this shit wont go away//) some of my friends saw each other irl and stuff, or talked about stuff i didn´t understand/didn´t want to hear while on discord. I felt alienated. I felt empty. I got mad at a friend for the first time, for something he said. I ended up isolating myself. A friend celebrated her birthday. She invited me and never excluded me, asked me a lot of things and asked to virtually include me. But that would just make me feel more alienated, wouldn´t it? I told her it was ok, i didn´t go. Honestly, I felt like a bother. I didn´t want to bother. I wasn´t okay, but i didn´t want to bother anyone, so i isolated myself. I had a very bad breakdown. lasted weeks. When I recovered, it wasn´t the same. It felt like everyone else was closer, while i drifted away. I kind of recconected with some of my friends from Japan after this. In the vacations, i felt like i reconnected with some friends just to drift away again later. However, i never could reconnect with one of my best friends. She never really got mad at me or anything ( i think) but we don´t really talk much anymore. We used to talk daily, be it actual talking, memes, anything. I don´t think we´ve actually talked in weeks. There´s nothing I can do. This year, another friend had a birthday, but I was so disconnected from everyone I didn´t even care. I mean. It´s all broken now, isn´t it? The other day I just started wondering. When did I start relating to Shintaro so much? I had always been like this, hadn´t I? Who am I, actually? Why do I relate so much now? It´s not just about the soda. I had lost friends before, but I never really felt like that. Sometimes I feel like I´ve lost everyone. In a one year span I became a hikkikomori. About a month ago, when I entered classes, I was recognized as Shintaro pfp and I admitted to kinning him to people i´d never talked to before (on chat) // I decided to go apeshit idc anymore about what anyone thinks of me// I had fun. I think I must´ve posted on my stories, because two different people told me they were the ene to my shintaro. I appreciated it. i mean it´s kinda true bc now that i´m only on the pc they do bother me online and try to get me to open up or get better but sometimes the just annoy me lmao but also not bc they all have their own particular lives and they all seem to be doing better than me. Still, my classmates are very nice and inclusive. But it´s not like im close to any of them I guess. I´m just alone now. I´m fucked up man....I don´t feel real anymore. I don´t really know who I am. I guess that´s why I find comfort in seeing a part of myself in Shintaro? But when did i turn out like this? Why didn´t I relate when I was younger? Well, I hadn´t really lost any friends back then. I now know how painful that is. How lonely it is to be alone even when there is people around. idk. and i´ve always been quiet. introverted. shy. a loser. yet now whenever i meet anyone i try to idk connect? but i cant. i wish i could be more evil. maybe it´d just be easier if everyone really, truly hated me. maybe i´d get the strength to actually kill myself then. it´s weird. i really see myself in route xx shintaro. I know that´s fucked up because I know how it ends. but truly, i was trying. I was healing, i think i was going somewhere. and i was trying to keep my newly formed renovated friend group together. I really was trying to. I didn´t mind if we had sub groups on the big group, but we were all there for each other. I tried my best. I felt like i belonged. but now im alone again. and this time there´s nothing i can do. if something, i´ve made it worse. and i keep making it worse. it´s weird. when i first got into kagepro, both shintaro and ayano felt like adults. i thought they were really, really big. im older than them now. now i know theyre not really adults. i get it. i still feel 18. after all, these last two years have been taken away from me. i didnt waste them myself this time.  i feel like a rotten 18 year old...when i listen to lost time memory, i just...get it. i always liked the song. i thought the story was so cool. when it first came out.. i still remember. iwas there. i waited for it. i loved it. i still do, but back then, i just saw it all as some really great and cool song. now i feel like i really, really get it. i love it even more. im hiding away in all my memories. but what is my true heart? what do i really want? i don´t know, i don´t know... If I'm 'wise' then, I can't face forward; I have no reason to so, I'll rot away instead It would be nice if time could be turned back. Years may pass but I'll never die I repeat hopeful words to myself, even though I know I still won't be able to reach you. "It doesn't matter, just die already!" I said as I clutched my wrist, simply cursing it. Unable to do anything, I merely indulged myself in life. "If summer can show me dreams, then let's go to before you were taken away" The days where I hid my embarrassment are illuminating upon the atmosphere and burning my mind. If I'm wishing for a dream that can't come true, then I'll embrace this blurry past and have a dream which I don't wake up from and naturally seclude myself from the outside world. "But that means you can't even see tomorrow?" I don't really care 'bout that, so it's ok I stained my hands in order to kill these boring days I'm choosing "solitude" after all A rotten boy at 18 today too, prayed again while clinging on to your colored smile Underneath the blazing sun Asking "Somehow, please take me away instead of leaving like this!" and my murmuring breath was quietly stopped

I guess i just wish someone could actually help me. take me out of this hole. Maybe some kind of closure would be nice. It´s not the same, though. I don´t have enough bravery in myself to actually kill myself. Mostly because of guilt. I can´t take the guilt of dissapointing everyone. I don´t want my parents to get hurt. I don´t want my bunny to miss me. Yet i wish everyday for it to be over. Lately, half of my dreams have been in Japan, with many friends, some who i met there, some who have never been there. Yet my brain shows me the dreams before it was all taken away. I think one of my favorite parts of the day is dreaming. I like to sleep simply because I dream. And i sleep very few. mayb bc i hate myself? I still barely indulge in life. I do anything to stay distracted. If i think, it all goes to shit. it all does. like now. Heh. it´s funny. I guess no one is truly my ene, because no one actually knows how mentally fucked up i got these past months. No one knows how badly i´ve been treating myself and how badly i´ve been doing. Still, i can´t tell anyone but scream it into the tumblr void. No one has to keep up with my shit. No one has to take care of me. After all, it was I who chose solitude. It was me who kept them away. But I don´t get a second choice. I don´t get a change of routes if things go sour. And i guess I don´t get to get a mentally fucked up friend group where I belong for a second time. Once was good enough, wasn´t it? I.. Even when I wasnt as deep as i am now (again) into kagepro, ive always wanted to die on August 15. It holds meaning to me now as well. Every year I used to ask people to go out with me that day. I know im not brave enough to kill myself. I always hoped for a lil miracle i guess. Last year was the first year...I didn´t do anything. I just... I just hope this year i can make it. I hope the miracle happens this year....I can only hope......its too late for me to be saved, isn´t it? I never thought it´d be like this. I don´t get closure. I don´t get goodbyes. I am left behind on a world that keeps moving. I am nothing.