#also like i cant make a comic out of every situation

[todayisafridaynight]

NO YOU’RE SO RIGHT ABOUT THE MAJIMA STUFF THOUGH. GOD. God forbid you speak poorly about the fandom silly guy etc etc. I rt’d one post about someone being annoyed abt majima getting an insane amount of merch (especially compared to other characters- even other PLAYABLE characters) and suddenly my TL is filled with ppl taking it as a personal attack….. like?? Settle down???

My one fear is that instead of Mine content we’re just gonna get Majima Saga 2 for yk3 and rgg will call it a day. WHAT ELSE IS THERE TO SAY ABOUT THE GUY !!! GENUINELY!!!

at this rate we’re going to have a complete record of Majima’s life from birth until modern day bc you knowww they’re never gonna let the cash cow die or retire. + god I lowkey need the 3jimas to break up Now so saejima and daigo can stand on their own again (w/out being overshadowed by Majima)…. Saejima especially… I miss the days when he felt like a character………

(I may have a lot to say on the topic) (he’s a fun character but at this rate I’m getting so sick of the fandom around him)

gen is kinda funny how when there's the Monthly Critique Of Majima post on twitter the rggtwt part of the tl is flooded with majima fans being upset. its like clockwork really LOL

as for saejima, i do miss him being solo... like he's funny with majima at times, but as wack as Y4 was i still really liked his coliseum scene, and his prison adventures in Y5 were a real treat too..

[gatorbites-imagines]

John Constantine x tattoo artist?? Smut or no (you choose!) I think it would be cute if john gets his tats from the reader (also kind of a possessive/marking quality there lol)

John Constantine x Tattoo artist male reader

Headcanons

Sorry there’s been no posts this week, classes have started up again, so as you can imagine I’m exhausted and have a lot less free time. I’ve been using most of my free time to read JJK, ngl.

Imagine being a magical tattoo artist, something like a seal maker. You do large complex and beautiful pieces, but you hide different seals and protection markers inside the patterns. It keeps the real purpose of the tattoo a secret, but is also pretty to look at.

John already has tattoos in the hellblazer comics, but imagine you giving him different ink. Something a lot less obvious and more attractive.

It makes him pass as a hot blonde British guy covered in a lot of fancy ink, instead of some brit with lotsa weird cult looking tattoos.

John becomes one of your most common customers, mainly because a lot of the tattoos you put on him disappear after the seals been used, since its all defense and storage. He might also use it as an excuse to see you more, so he can flirt.

John being John, would get a tattoo right above his crotch, think like a reverse tramp stamp, or a succubus tattoo, just so he can have you sitting between his thighs as he gives his flirting his all.

You definitely end up railing him within an inch of his life in the tattoo chair, tsking and “punishing” him for straining the tattooed area too much, and “messing up your work” when he writhes too much.

In the beginning its just a friends with benefits situation, something like a “happy ending” you might say. John wouldn’t be someone to do relationships for the most part, since most of the ones he’s been in haven’t ended great.

He subconsciously also wouldn’t want to paint a target on your back, since hes always involved with all kinds of stuff. But he cant help but always find himself back with you, getting some new seal inked onto his skin.

And if every visit ends up with him bent over the tattoo chair, or down on his knees to “thank you”, then who will judge him.

John would end up finally acknowledging his feelings when you save him from his big bad of the week, using your complex and intricate tattoos to pull out weapons and spells, and later seal the being that’s after him.

Its hard to deny how he feels after that, and though he wouldn’t put it into words, he would act differently. Like just showing up at your parlor to spend time with you without getting anything done, or sending you little protection charms or trinkets.

At some point you guys just start kissing and acting like a couple, without actually putting a name to it. It’s a dangerous life you both live, and words mean everything, so you never tell anybody you guys are lovers, since that would make the target on you both even bigger.

It doesn’t keep you guys from pretty much living together and acting all domestic, or being completely exclusive to just each other. John turning down all advances made on him confuses people in the beginning, until they just come to accept it.

John ends up with even more tattoos, these a lot more complex than average useable seals. These are the kinds that you have spent your entire life developing, and had only used on yourself because they’re that powerful.

The league are knocked back by how powerful his spells have become, and how much damage he can withstand. Only other magic users with the knowledge know just how amazing his tattoos are. He never tells them where he got them, just because he’s an ass.

You end up helping out more with his business, and he ends up being free advertisement for your parlor. Of course, no one gets tattoos like you or John, you would never give a possible enemy that kind of power, but it helps pad your pockets quite a lot.

John’s enemies end up targeting you as well, but they’re easily dealt with for the most part.

He ends up getting teased be friends and allies that he’s getting soft and domestic, cuz he doesn’t go out to bars like before, and wants to be home in time to watch a movie with you, or just go to sleep together.

He ends up a lot less stressed too, since you rock his world whenever he needs it, and become someone he can let down his defenses and just be vulnerable with.

In the end he probably gets pavloved to get in the mood when you tattoo him, or he hears the noise of the tattoo gun. John always blames you for making him this way, because you always go down on him after giving him new ink, not that he’s complaining.

[sexcromancy]

okay I know everyone has been clamoring to find out wtf I mean by season 6 is about itself so it's time to spill. I first started thinking about this around once more with feeling, bc that episode, even more than every other "experimental" episode that came before it, is commenting on the existence of the show itself. the songs and the pretense of it, and the way the characters are aware of their performance, all emphatically say "this is a narrative we are playing out." especially Buffy's song, where she likens slaying to a dance she can't stop doing. once I thought about that, I also thought about how Buffy's resurrection, the trio, and the spuffy romance are all also metatextually aware elements of the season. all of these trends continued throughout the season and now I want to really dig into it.

first, Buffy's resurrection: ive learned that in behind the scenes terms, jwhedon originally wanted s5 to be the last. it seems like by the time they were writing and shooting s5, they knew that wouldn't be the case, but the show was also moving networks and jw was going to be less present due to angel/firefly/etc. so bringing buffy back was a very self-conscious act. this feels really relevant in how and why she comes back: unwillingly dragged out by her biggest supporters. if we think of buffy the character, buffy the slayer, and sarah michelle gellar as three concurrent aspects, this move affected each of them in parallel. buffy the character has to come back, because fans cant live without her. buffy the slayer has to come back, because her friends cant live without her. smg has to come back, because the show doesnt exist without her (underlined by the stories of her being the only one with the capital to protect people from joss on set). so character, slayer and actress are back in action! but... why? bringing her back, especially after such a momentous and well-meaning death, needs to be justified. or it doesn't, if the writers decide to take a metatextual approach and have buffy herself (and others) question and criticize the decision. the season is essentially asking the question, through buffy, of why it exists?

the trio is the next aspect of season 6 i thought about wrt the metatextual elements of the season. they also function on three levels: as writer analogue, as fan analogue, and as villain criticism. on a writer level, the trio exists in the season to put buffy in situations. in episodes like life serial, gone, dead things, and normal again, they create the circumstances that would have previously been classic "monster of the week" scenarios. but because there is an onscreen intermediary, we get the commentary of why and how they do this to buffy: to test her, to challenge her, to bring about crises of faith or power. they don't even necessarily want to kill her (at first), and instead just want to nebulously "take her down", but really it is transparently obvious that they know they need her to justify their own existence. their genre-awareness as nerds only adds to this, segueing into the second aspect: fanboy analogues. they want to observe, consume, create Buffy's suffering - but they also want to keep her at a safe distance where she can't get to them. there is a sexuality to their obsession, and it's extremely objectifying. they only see her, shallowly, as the other half of their comic book dyad. this is why her compassion and moral code at the end of the season is so baffling to them. finally, the members of the trio each represent different forms of villains and their plot drawbacks: Jonathan the opportunist who can't follow through, Andrew the forever lackey, and warren the one who crosses the boundary from fun villainy into real misogynistic violence. they are all motivationless and largely devoid of characterization outside these personas, making them flat and uninteresting to watch. but that's tv villains, often: with only a season to introduce and develop them, they lack depth. after reaching the heights of fighting a god in s5, the show had to bring it all the way back down to earth by interrogating the very idea of villains themselves, again coming back to the question: why does any of this exist?

another great lens to view metanarrative through is spike and James Marsters. as legend goes, spike was only supposed to be a one season villain, leaving the show after season 2. but spike, as played by Marsters, turned out to be so much more than the failures of villains described above. he was watchable, funny, sexy, and unexpected. by all accounts he completely undermined joss' vision for the show, but he was so popular that demand kept bringing him back. in s4 marsters apparently brought up the idea of being a love interest for buffy all the time, primarily because he thought it was the only way to justify spike staying in Sunnydale (and thus on the show) post-chip. he thought it would only make sense if spike was obsessed with the slayer. it took until s5 to realize that intention, then until s6 to start digging into it. so there's two layers for spike and Marsters to function on: justifying his continued existence on the show, and in Sunnydale, by deepening his connection with buffy. that connection is also thematically tied to spike's previous role in s5: confidant and perceptive observer with whom buffy can explore her interest in death. as buffy is questioning why she exists, and whether she should, her interactions with spike threaten to pull her to the "dark side". he wants her to live, but he wants her to live as a creature of the night, chasing pleasure, abandoning morals. the show is clearly framing this as a horrible choice. in the world of btvs, buffy's adherence to a moral code is why she exists. if she turned her back on Being The Slayer, her friends, her responsibilities... then that would be just as bad as being dead. it is between these two extremes that buffy must find her way. now, i don't really agree with this version the show presents, and i think marsters - and spike - don't either. he is commanding her attention, and quite literally forcing his way in, which is scary. we feel the fear and tension of a character exerting force on the narrative. but i also feel the compassion and the desperation for understanding underneath that, which creates a really strong and layered dynamic. similar to faith, the character as played is at odds with the writing, and it works in the show's favor.

those are the three main areas where I focused my analysis. I also want to point out some other moments and parallels that I noticed:

buffy is watching dawn play out earlier seasons of her own arc, especially in all the way where dawn speedruns a relationship with a vampire. in this way, buffy watches a version of her own life - of the television show btvs - and has a similar perspective to us, the viewers, seeing how much she's grown and changed in the last 4 seasons.

gone as an episode proves this entire thesis through absence. when buffy "disappears" from the show (because of the trio!) she is able to live her life how she wants, free from the judgement of friends/viewers. this is also true of episodes in previous seasons, ie where the wild things are, where she gets to fuck all day while everyone else has to solve the scary mystery.

Giles leaves in this season, notably also the season where Joss purportedly spent much less time on set and was less involved. no more Giles as moral center and father figure means buffy has to figure out who she is without him - and the show has to figure out what it is without Joss. giles' departure also squares nicely with the show becoming much less monster of the week focused; no one really cares about the research or the plan, often to their detriment. they also don't take the trio (the other writers) seriously until its too late. the season is much more focused on the emotional worlds of the characters and their consequences than the monsters. plus, when he returns and buffy recounts the events of the season, they burst out laughing. this is poking a little fun at how this season has differed from the "established world" of buffy up through season 5.

I started to notice that every single episode was referencing, either directly or subtextually, prior episodes of the show. for example, in gone buffy mentions the season 2 episode where clea duvall disappeared. in dead things when is buffy beating spike, it visually parallels faith and buffy in who are you. all the way, as mentioned above. willow's heartbreak over tara and spiraling into magic use rhymes with something blue. the show is very self-referential in general, but in this context i also see it as the characters playing out their version of a time loop. they are stuck running the same tracks over and over, unable to get out of sunnydale (because they have to be characters on the show) and thus doomed to its patterns.

as a postcript: i had already developed most of this theory when i read this post on the existential scoobies forum, which ive been keeping up with to get a sense for the contemporary reactions as the show was airing. cynesthesia's post was made following as you were, and its an excellent breakdown of the season up to the point as it is laid out in OMWF. i highly recommend the post and the comments; she notes many things i hadn't considered and the connections to the lyrics of OMWF are brilliant. it's really fun to see my same thoughts echoed back to me 22 years ago! scrolling through the archives of the forum is really fun and enlightening re: real time buffy fans.

[liamket]

guys. i could say that im very normal abt the update. but that would be a lie. and lying is bad. yeah. im nothing close to normal abt this whole thing im deranged.

theres so many details here.

Time seems to be more calm, the last update he was at the verge of screaming (to shut them all? to call for help to control all these links? who knows) now he looks very thoughtful, taking in every detail of the whole place to see if he can get some sort of puzzle solved

This question i feel like it has more impact that it looks at first, a lot of people are pointing out the little owl friend we saw at the first doodles of the AU, yeah the owl in oot was a yapper in all rule, but he was some sort of guidance during his journey

Twilight connects the owls to Shad, a guy who has a lot of knowledge and can help him at any moment if he needs some sort of information, Four remembers the owl that helped the colors during his second adventure, and Legend connects the owls to the statues in Koholint, together with the owl that gave him hints to where he had to go

Here it is made clear the point that i was talking before: Time recognizes that even if, for a kid, it was just an anoying bird, he helped him in some sort of way, and he should appreciated that small detail

beautiful art there's so many birds here im delighted so happy i've been staring at this for already 6 minutes beautiful

Owlan! as someone who also has slept during class so many times i dont blame Sky at all

also can we talk about how cool is Owlan's design??? like why i haven't seen anyone commenting abt it???? the yellow feather just makes me thing of the loftwing that we had to chase during the start of sksw, and i love that small detail so much

and Sun!! Finally she got a canon apparition, and of course it is with Sky sleeping during class lol

going back with what i was saying before, yeah he can thank Kaepora Gaebora all he wants, but man did that bird talk so much

love that expression 10/10 no more notes needed

EMO RULIE EMO RULI-

putting that joke aside, Hyrule seems to be more careful inside a dungeon, sure he can try and explore all he wants outside, but he knows very well the dangers of a dungeon, and he would like to no take any risk that could put them in danger while he can help it

I love the continuity of the comic, we all knew these were the same statues as the one that Twi used to separate them from Sky, but seeing it being portrayed in the comic is a detail that i think we all appreciate

Twilight my guy you cant go and look all that innocent we know your tricks

also Sky still remembers that time, seeing Legend as a bunny will not be easily forgotten. And Legends knows it

it doesn't mean that he likes that little fact

here i have things to say, it makes sense that the antifairy goes first for Legend, he's like. one of the most magic-based of them. Sure maybe Hyrule is our special wizard guy, but the vet uses a shit ton of magic weapons, he has to have a crazy amount of magic with him adding the rings he has

Also them all ready to defend their vet, yeah it might not be fully dangerous, but they will show no mercy to whatever dares to hurt one of them (a silent promise that they all made with the Twilight situation)

Time's attention is instantly gained with the mention of a Fairy, he doesn't sees too much of his friends in that thing, and that gives him a bad feeling of why the name

i could easily do a well thought comment on how he's magical girl material but i think with only that description enough was said

Only with the thought of one of his fairy friends having such destiny makes Time be disgusted, a Fairy turned into an enemy? Doesn't sound right, it isn't natural and just cruel for the poor fairy

also Wind was ready to catch her, he knows how valuable are fairies during a dungeon, you never know when you will need her help

Warriors during his adventure he made friends with the fairies, so he obviously will have something for her

he's like a mom who knows her children very well and will carry any treats for them, not beating up the mom/aunt of the group allegations

and Wind give the poor fairy some time before entering the bottle, she must be confused :(

this last pannel is everything to me, very cool very beautiful i love thsi comic so much

now my fav pannels as usual!

beautiful art as always every time i see a new update i get surprised by all the details

if you noticed a lot of Four in the last few images shushhh

as always, art credits goes towards @linkeduniverse!

[cweek]

hi tumblr user cweek, i love your art, your shapes are so fun and dynamic and your characterizations are very charming! anyway i’m writing this thing and i would like your advice on how to write tweek’s mannerisms… how do you do it in text? have you read fics that make you say “yess this is it?” or is it just you against the world… anything helps, really :^(

thank youuu this is very kind but unfortunately idk how much i can help i dont read fics and seeing as im an artist i only write scripts for comics... very different from actual writing... it also allows you to cheat his dialogue cuz you can play with the formatting and really exaggerate the text which is what i do + theres a visual to look at already so its more expressive yk.

also south park is um. not very serious. so if youre taking your south park fanfiction seriously theres also that. i can only imagine tweek is one tough cookie to write you cant really all caps or anything either lol. but i guess what you do have is the ability to actually describe his behavior instead of writing out every noise he makes

people put a lot of gahs in his speech but ive noticed modern tweek tends to make more of these like. grunts and huffs and snorts so you can utilize that. its very frequent in tfbw if you want a reference but keep in mind theyre video game quotes that are supposed to be short and quippy so hes a lot more noisy there. if you actually pay attention to the way he talks in txc and pid he rarely makes any of those sounds? idk its very inconsistent but id say it depends on his mood and the situation hes in. paranoid tweek screams and yelps and growls while tweek at the end of txc is completely calm and speaks without any hitches. tweek in tfbw might be a bit agitated bc of craig + having to improv and fight + everything else that happens in that game. so maybe thats why he grunts so much lol and when he does it usually goes at the start or the end of his sentences he just makes a quick noise... id say its fine to include in his dialogue when its something simple like acks and nghs. an ack goes a long way...

then theres the light stuttering (or whatever you call it) and the stops that i briefly talked about the other day. my advice is to Not include those actually unless you want to bring attention to it. tweeks voice acting really makes his character what it is and sometimes you just cant transcribe it i think trying to be accurate to these miniscule details will only ruin the flow of his speech and (again) make him sound like jimmy. going back to my point of describing things instead you can probably just mention when hes struggling to get his words out or something

this kind of turned into tweeks speech analysis which is probably not what you needed sorry! im not a writer and i dont know how writing him into an actual story would go i just make him say funny things sometimes. also im not trey or matt so i might be completely off the mark but these are just some of my observations. ummm. well i hope this is at least Something

[deadchannelradio]

🥤🌻 🍄 ❄️ 🍦

🥤 ⇢ recommend an author or fanfic you love

door, opening is a fic about . i'll just paste the summary for you.

Flying back to Cherry Street, weaving reckless in the dark, it comes down to this: Dick is the only one of his siblings that Jason has any real claim on. Dick is the only one of that whole mess of victims to Batman's cult of self-immolation who belongs to Jason. Even more than that - Dick is the only person in the world who he shares a parent with, who knows what it meant to be the Robin to Batman of nearly ten years ago. It's just not the same anymore. So if Dick fucking kicks it, Jason's the only one left. Jason becomes an only child. Jason becomes the last of his kind. Jason becomes the sole keeper of that memory, of a brotherhood shared under a man who no longer exists. There is no way to replace Dick, because the world that they lived in together is gone, and can never give Jason a surrogate.

The Red Hood pulls the thread on a mystery big enough to bridge the distance between two cities, two brothers: The plot they unravel is far deeper and darker than a garden-variety drug trafficking scheme. A story about siblingship, hauntings, and rivers.

EXHAUSTIVELY researched. LOVINGLY written with someone who cares VERY deeply about the characters they're using and the story theyre telling. also i'm the editor and the author is my hot sexy hot boyfriend who is a genius and an artist and is the only reason i know anything about dc comics lol. You Should Check It Out Right Now. Its Everything You Are Searching For.

🌻 ⇢ tag someone you appreciate but don't talk to on a regular basis

i dont talk to most people on here but i REALLY enjoy everything @cairoscene has ever written like truly and @vinelark has such an enchanting style of writing. @alkaloidunderstander makes me like scream laugh with every post. there's a lot of really talented and smart and funny people on my 'puter.

this is gonna be so long so. cut. for your dashboards.

🍄 ⇢ share a head canon for one of your favourite ships or pairings

im so full of these. 1) we all know i think jason is a tgirl. 2) i think about rose making a reddit post about the situation like once a month trying to figure out if shes gay or not.

Am I Gay? My (20sF) Only Guy Situation Just Told Me She’s a Trans Woman I (20sF) have been in a situationship with this guy for like 4 years now and we get on really well, but they’re the only guy i’ve ever been into more than passingly. She just came out as a lady and now i think i might be gay. Say anything transphobic and i’ll come to your house and turn your head into a fine meat paste. EDIT: yes i’m still fucking into her. obviously.

Reddituser1: Four Years? Girl thats just a relationship

well no not really because she dated someone else in there and stopped seeing me so we stopped fucking for like 2 years theyre probably broken up now or opened the relationship or something idk

reddituser1: you dont know if theyre broken up?

I mean i dont care

Reddituser1: what if shes cheating on them

why would i care about that. Thats not relevant to me or my interests, which are her mouth hands dick and hole

reddituser1: you dont care if youre the other woman?

I’m a bad person 🤷🏼‍♀️ am i gay or not dude answer the question

❄️ ⇢ what's your dream theme/plot for a fic, and who would write it best?

boyfriend and i have talked abt a longform redhood fic where he goes to war w the GCPD and ends up on the fucking news a lot and ends up somewhat halfway repairing his relationships w his family after a 3 year downward spiral that i've written a couple scenes for but i think he could write it better to be so real w you

ive done icecream you cant make me do it again. <3

[dateamonster]

to get more to the actual point, im watching crow callers video on the lightlark sequel and it made me go like. why do these kinds of color-by-numbers ya romances and their badboy romantic leads so continuously tear down the protags agency in a way thats framed as desirable? like why is it considered appealing when the guy pressures the girl to wear something way more revealing than shes comfortable with? why does the protag keep getting into these like almost comically uncomfortable sounding sexual situations by complete accident? most of all, what is the reader supposed to get out of this?

and like i think my Game Theory here is that these books' audience is mostly girls and young women who are interested in intimacy but also kind of terrified and at least a little ashamed of it, so the fantasy of a kind of intimacy that happens against-their-will-but-not-really and therefor makes them blameless for their enjoyment of it is highly appealing.

part of me feels like i should find that more messed up than i do, and i suppose i do sometimes, but mostly it hits me in the way of like figuring out how eating candy triggers your brain to make more dopamine. is it healthy? probably not always. certainly not if its the only thing you consume. but i cant rly begrudge ppl wanting to feel happy even its through mildly unhealthy means. i too enjoy feeling happy every now and again believe it or not.

[tanasha-not-yet]

What do you think Greylock's favourite food is? And do you think he prefers sweet or sour foods?

ah idk idk!!

i tried to reply to this like two times already i feel veery cringe about these but you knew what you were subscribing to when you hit the follow button so behold

instinctively i want to give him: 1. love for sweets (to fight with cedric over jellybeans, to mess with slickwell by 'degustating' every fucking cake they make at the kitchen, to have a ton of lil candys in his pockets etc. it has a con tho bc i think the message 'this fat guy likes sweets A Lot' is preeety problematic but dude. this thin guy likes sweets just as much imo let them be.) 2. love for some stinky shit like garlic and onion (for a IM NOT FUCKING KISSING YOU AFTER YOU ATE THAT GARLIC BREAD YOU MORON situation) 3. love for little treats and snacks (to make this person eat crackers and leave crumbs where cedric doesnt want them to be; plus it lines up with some attention troubles hc which is based on totally nothing) 4. also in terms of cooking id give him an ability and love for baking?? i think?? cannot relate to it at all but this man Would bake a bread toad or a bunch of cedric shaped cookies with a comically long nose to eat in front of him (EATING HIM UP you know) (and when cedric tried doing the same thing in revenge he would end up with hilariously ugly fucked up cookies from those tiktoks which greylock would laugh at for fucking days)

if i tried to say anything based tho? based? me? i can only say cringe sorry my bros. but i think some of these would make sense: 1. him having some restrictions about sweets (medical or maybe personal). based on the sour look he gives cedric when he conjures a piñata. this hc is kinda bad in terms of making the original message (greylock hates the spotlight being stolen) less clear by adding on an additional reasoning. but i think its hilarious like You Fucking Knew I Cant Eat Too Much Sugar Per Day And Invoked Every Candy I Love Right In Front Of My Face. You'll pay for it Right Now 2. since i hc his job mainly being about organising parties in the castle he probably hangs out around rich people a lot and kinda eats from the same table?? if it makes sense?? so in my head he knows quite some things about superexpensive food and can define vines (their ages, sorts of grapes, country etc you know this stereotypical rich shit), super obscure caviar sorts and idk im not rich lol 3. he totally have eaten some Too Spicy Sauses or Too Big Steaks or Too Strong Drinks just to prove he can. competitiveness is like his main trait he totally knows what it's like to attempt to say a fully coherent toast right after 100g of vodka so that the king even wouldnt notice he's drunk just because a random nobleman said he couldnt. this may also be one of many reasons he chose to entertain the kids (I REPEAT, ONE OF MANY) if he had a choice of course

maybe these are too childish i apologize if they are. two years into i still cant place a full three dimentional character in my head my media literacy is dying on the grave of the last book i read an embarrassingly long time ago

[pympartic]

:[ OOC ;; STEALING A THING FROM @transistorized //; TOP THREE RUNS TO UNDERSTAND HANK AND JOHNATHAN BOTH EMH AND 616 ]:

[ AVENGERS FOREVER 1999 ;; If I had a nickel for every time Busiek split Hank and Yellowjacket into two different personalities and DIDNT paint it as a Mr Hyde situation i'd have two nickels and id be so happy about it! Busiek was one of the big writers who inspired a LOT of EMH's characterization of hank and is one of the writers who really went in on the idea of treating Yellowjacket like a character with his own agency, wants and fears. It's by far the biggest display of the two personalities and their differences, and its no Secret that any time Busiek writes Yellowjacket he always gives the guy some more nuance; here is no different! It gives very fun insights into how he thinks, and what he thinks of the inevitable 'you must become hank pym' situation which I could write a whole damn essay about and have taken heavy inspiration for on why my hank and yellowjacket remain separate personalities. ]

[ TL ; DR ;; Biggest inspiration outside of the show itself for Johnathan's personality, as well as how he see's himself and the idea of just becoming Hank Pym instead of staying himself. ]

[ AVENGERS VOLUME 3 ISSUES # 1-55 ;; oh hey its Busi- YES ITS HIM AGAIN SEE THE RAMBLE ABOVE! Jokes aside this run of Avengers deal with Hank as hes trying to find his footing again and rejoining the team as well as his guilt over his past mistakes. There's a lot done with his guilt over Ultron, how he feels about his own mind being his base and later on how he and Yellowjacket see each other because Yet Again these two boyos are separated entities that get to chat with each other showing a good display of Yellowjackets to be expected 'fuck around and find out' personality but also his self awareness of said personality and the damage it does. Lot of good insight into the boys and their perspectives just Dont Read anything Austen adds on when he enters because if you're wondering where 'wife beater angry man yellowjacket' gets a lot of his fire you can thank THIS GUY... ]

[ TL ; DR ;; Much of hanks recovery arcs both in my mainline and 616 revival verses take inspiration from this run and how hank handles recovery which leads us to- ]

[ AVENGERS ACADEMY ERA ( 2010 ) ;; Weird arc with Greer Aside; Avengers Academy was a wonderful End Point to hanks longstanding healing arc over the years and puts him in a position to use his experience from said arc to help his students. Something the comic lets him SUCCEED IN as we're blatantly told that even with the slips and mistakes hank makes his students feel safe and loved, so much so that the joke of him being their dad becomes commonplace even Outside AA comics. He becomes a surrogate father to a lot of these kids which putting aside how funny that is to do with an ant themed character becoming a papa bear to his own little ant hill of kids is genuinely what I consider to be the peek of hanks multi-decade arc. ]

[ TL ; DR ;; Great way to see how hank views his past mistakes in the modern day as well as what hes Doing with his life until marvel tosses him away ]

HONORABLE MENTIONS THAT I CANT PARAGRAPH ABOUT

[ AVENGERS UNDERCOVER 2014 ] ;; Papa bear hank content also he yells at S.H.I.E.L.D and we love when people do that.

[ WEST COAST AVENGERS 1984 ] ;; OH LIKE IM NOT PUTTING THIS HERE. West Coast laid the foundation for hanks recovery road and is to thank for a Lot of his growth in ways i simply Dont Have Space to Detail and we get him and jan starting to reconsile and its so cute and him and tony are adorable and him and clint are wholesome and yeah its got issues but GO READ IT.

[sleepyhouse2art]

Infodump to me about Jules (if you want) he is my favorite hard core drugs character I think. Well actually it might be Joey. Idk tell me about Jules though

gladly! anytime :)

here are some random assorted facts about jules:

-born in 1934 to rudolph and gillian shaw at mount sinai hospital, nyc

-his middle name is alexander

-his stomach is partially paralyzed, hence the tube. he also has a port in his chest. he can eat a little by mouth, mostly for the taste

-as a child, had a dog named bobby, as well as a black horse named tacitus who his father forced him to shoot when he got sick

-speaks french because he went to a catholic boarding school in chavagnes, france. bizarrely still remembers how to speak it even though he often forgets basic information. his brain is fucking wild

-6'2, 110 lbs. used to be 6'3, but lost an inch of height due to osteoporosis from being forced to take anti-androgens

-owns a jet that he forgets he has

-favorite drink is this fancy brand of lemon soda

-favorite food is cake

-used to be a long-distance runner

-drunk on highballs when his daughter abby came into the world, the duration of which he paced outside in the hall while his wife cecilia did a typical 1950s twilight birth

-only knows one joke outside of straight-up laughing at people who are concerned about his constant medical emergencies (he has the health of a sickly gerbil), and it is "hi hungry! im dad!", only its NOT 'hi hungry! im dad!" its 'hi abby! im dad!' and he thinks its hilarious

-reads at a second-grade level, nonetheless has written two memoirs

-only butterknives in his house, thank you

-heavily addicted to barbiturates since 1956. he is fucked the FUCK up 24/7 and everyone is just like good for you jules. fuck it. let the man live

-extreme old money new york accent. slurs constantly

-left eyeball twitches wildly when hes nervous

-keeps photograph books of handsome g.i.s under a loose tile in his upstairs bathroom; would spontaneously combust if he knew anybody knew about them, which nic definitely does

-has met joey's mom, lillian, multiple times. he and cecilia actually used to go to the moskowitz family's apartment for little dinner parties. so joey knows julian from way back. theyve both seen each other in situations they would rather not. their relationship is pretty complicated

-pays for the very very nice care home in which lillian lives. its in santa clara, which is 45 minutes away from san francisco. julian goes there once a week to see her. joey goes when he can stand it, which often he cant. something really, really bad happened to joeys mom a long time ago, which is why she lives there. it has been vaguely referred to in hard core drugs but we wilkl find out a lot more about it later in the comic

-spent a year alone on the street after the hospital and used to live in a bedroom in back of the pharmacy

-favorite singer is connie francis, favorite movie is meet me in st. louis, favorite season is summer because its green and its the only time hes not freezing, favorite color is literally EVERY COLOR EVER (hes not used to colors bro), favorite actor is tab hunter (purely for aesthetic reasons), favorite fruit is peach

-likes hippies (he calls them "the flower children"; some of these "flower children" picked him up off the highway in a vw bus when he ran away from the hospital), gardening (has to wear gloves because dirt is filthy and DIRTY), music (he didnt hear any for 10 years; he likes especially when eli plays the piano), nice department stores, the san francisco wharf, knitting, windows (very impressed by them)

-hates dogs, his urologist, rock hudson, hospitals (to make an understatement), clothing designed by emilio pucci, the smell of antiseptic, "mess" (i mean like a smudge on a window or a small scrap of tape left over from hanging streamers or a single toast crumb on the counter), occasionally nic (they bicker like a married couple and sometimes jules screams at him and throws shit)

-uses a special type of fancy purple shampoo to keep brassiness out. also, nicotine stains

-speaking of which, smokes three packs a day. gauloises. theyre french cigarettes

-catholic but ambivalent; likes to go to mass because its pretty and likes to confess to the priest because he is literally guilt incarnate

-doesnt understand numbers, cant read a clock, unaware that jfk was shot, not quite up to date on social mores, kind of antisemitic but surrounded by jews (joey and eli)

-really, really, really good at following directions with zero explanation as to why he needs to do the thing

-could sit still for ten or twelve hours in perfect silence and stare at a wall and be totally fine

-laughed genuinely for the first time since 1956 on a lake trip in 1972. yes, his laugh is weird as fuck. no, dont tell him

-his cat, dorothy-dotty, is named after dorothy parker

i have a literally endless amount of julian shaw truefaxxx so uh, you know, feel free to ask whenever lol

if you would like me to infodump to you about joey you can send me another ask sometime, im always down for brainrot hours :))))

thank you!!! this was fun!!! its cool you like my 38 year old son (although in hard core drugs he is 39 because its a year after what is happening in the writing rn)!!!

[fatphobiabusters]

Brooms by Jasmine Walls and Teo DuVall

[PHOTO ID: The title Brooms is in white all capital letters set against a night scene with a full moon. The cover features two shoulder up illustrations: one is a biracial woman looking away with long black hair and a large earing, one is a Black woman looking forward with a blue collared shirt and a purple biller har, one smaller shoulder up illustration of a Black man with a white collared shirt.

Two full body illustrations on brooms. One of a Chinese woman riding the broom like a surf board wearing a blue handkerchief, white t shirt and blue skirt the other is a Black woman in a yellow dress with one leg up in a stirrup and one arm out with a glow.

And two waist up illustrations of biracial sisters one in pink with glasses and braids and one in purple with her hair up.

Next to the girl in pink and the woman in yellow are the author, illustrator, letter setter and colorist names, in large text: Jasmine Walls, Teo DuVall then in smaller text: Bex Glendining & Ariana Maher. END ID]

Image from Goodreads

Overall rating: 10/10

I can't do a traditional pro cons list because I can't think of a thing I would have wanted different, outside of topics I cant "review" of course (more on this later). However before we get too far I need to lay out the setting so you know what you are getting into! This is a graphic novel about magic realism set in 1930s Mississippi. It follows women (and two girls) of color and their attempt to make cash doing illegal broom racing to make their lives, well easier for one, but also safer.

This isnt a utopia, magic is woven into the racism of the era. No slurs are used but subtle racism is depicted. There is a hierarchy of legality of who can use magic and what kind. It's a underdog story of solidarity and love, it has that "one last job and we retire" energy. While the young girls learn to harness their magic the police patrol, they are supported by a type of found family along side their blood family.

There is a happy ending I will at least spoil that much.

The blending of era and magic is lovingly crafted. For instance one character, Loretta, works as a laundress, she, like a lot of women in the time and place struggle with money and finds work where she can. Magic here isn't like the cheat code for easy living, she cant just magic the cloths clean and mended. It's a muscle to train and partner with not a deus ex eject button for every little thing. Each character reveals so much yet so little of themselves to us and there is an epiloge of sorts that delights the mind to want more of these characters. So I guess my point is, yes magic but also hardships and I've never seen it done like this before.

So all that said let me pull back on all the other things about this story and answer the question...

Hows the fat rep?: The characters come in many sizes, Loretta seems to be the biggest of her friend group. Her weight is never mentioned, no jokes about how a fat person could ride a broom! She's got a loving husband (no jokes about the size difference!) Billie Mae is the second biggest of the main cast perhaps more musclar than fat but is distinct imo in body shape and build and its my review so...she's different from Loretta, Lor is femme leaning and Billie is butch and here too there are no jokes it's simply a part of her design, shes the only woman on the team to wear pants. There are background and unnamed fat characters! You'd be suprised how hard that is to find.

This is very much a situation where weight is not brought up, it exists as a thing and thats it. And I appreciate that because fat peoples lives shouldn't be all about our weight, we deserve to exist with hobbies and interests and jobs.

Additionally: You might have seen that trend where people list off rep of a book and don't even mention the plot? Well I hope my introduction was enough to cover story and such because this comic has: visible and invisible disability rep, sapphics, a trans main character, and remember how I gushed about unnamed characters? There's also physical disabilities. The attention to detail while designing otherwise nameless characters is appreciated.

My limits as a reviewer:

I can't say if there good enough representation for Black women btw. For me this was obvious but I'm adding it just in case.

A main character is Deaf and due to the limitations of the medium the artist and writer had to imply signs. Consideration for the eye line of this character is given, she will bump and nudge people to turn towards her so she can read lips. I cannot say if this is a good compromise or not.

The issue of cultural appropriation could be had. It is mentioned that the author worked with the language experts from the Mississippi Band of Choctaw Indians, and in story residential schools are mentioned and briefly depicted. Was this respectful or enough research I cannot say.

You mighy find additional concern with the trans rep, it is mentioned that an outside source was consulted to bring authenticity. Related, a person was consulted about the Cantonese depicted. Was this enough I cannot say.

Individuals will each have their own feelings about own voices vs researched stories. There's no one perfect answer but I can only provide the info that's in the book to help you make informed decisions.

On Goodreads

[abimee]

For me, a common theme in your art is that it often depicts people going about their lives in every day situations. I know this seems odd for a ff14 account, but I mean more like you focus more in depicting "real" dynamics between people. Like I could run into them having a conversation at walmart or something. It's familiar in a way that isn't, for the lack of better words, sanitized? Your comic about Toriel passing on Hepatitis to Asriel is a comic that will be forever ingrained in my mind because of how it depicted the situation naturally and with care. Not to say that depicting hard situations is the only way your art comes off as "real", because that one ff14 art where its like "piss so hard so the hoes know my pussy grips like a rottweiler" is also real to me. Does that make sense? It feels unvarnished or painted over. You draw art about things no one really focuses on but happens every day in our lives. I genuinely hope what I'm trying to say comes through.

the pussy grip like a rottweilers bite part of this ask made me cackle out loud IM GLAD THAT ONE COMES OFF REAL TOO...

100% i hear you loud and clear anon i totally get you and i really like hearing this.... definitely one of the things ive strived for in my art and i think part of it is because i kind of have just mundane ideas compared to like super stylish composition pieces full with symbolism. not in a bad way my entire art endeavours have been built on ''i cant really draw those really cool poster type pieces but i can draw a character smoking a cigarette in a closet'' and just recognizing this is what i love the most. i want to make the art of what happens between the big moments of storylines where everyone is just sort of standing around scratching their ass or playing peggle on the phone so it means the world to me to know my art comes off like this....... will put this away in my brain as i crank out where i wanna go from here with things thank you so much for you inpout anon!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[spider-xan]

You're so real about the part of Miles forigivng Peter and Gwen,bc I swear to god if they make it seem like his romantic feelings are still there I'll be so pissed. Like I'm not saying ppl, especially teenagers dont have feelings for ppl who treat them like shit ,but this is more than being treated like shit.

Its fucked up on a level I cant even describe, same thing with Peter B . Gwen I can give SOME slack, because shes a teenager , but Peter is a grown ass man and didnt feel the need to let Miles know?? Especially when he was all "I had Mayday because of you!!" . Okay, you had your baby because of your dynamic with Miles...but you dont tell him what your 'boss' is up to?? Okay , whatever.

And i also agree with your concern about Margo, I dont want her screentime that probably wont be much to get taken up by some bs . And in a similar way, I'm hoping they dont sideline Jessica and somehow make it seem like she isnt Miguel's right hand. (This worry is because of how forgotten she is by fans. I wonder why.)

I just hope itll be decent, will barely give Gwen's dad any screentime, he sucks in every aspect. And I hope they dont kill anyone off in the worst way possible but I feel it in my bones that it'll happen.

Yeah, like, since I'm not Black, I'm going on what I remember reading Black fans on here talking about, and obviously Black people are not a monolith - for sure I have seen disagreement on the Miles and Gwen ship - but I remember people saying that the depth of betrayal from both of them as white people doing that to a Black person would cut really deep and probably not be forgivable, and I'm up in the air if they were intentionally doing a storyline where white people cannot be trusted if you're not white (probably not); and yeah, I can cut some slack for Gwen bc she's a teenage girl who was in an extremely precarious situation where she was homeless and only had the Spider Society as her lifeline, at least at the time, and she was obviously conflicted, and from a Doylist perspective, it gave her an interesting internal conflict - but yeah, I expect her to be forgiven bc this is ultimately still a superhero cartoon for kids, though hopefully they at least have a serious talk about it instead of it being handwaved for shipping.

Now, Peter B though - lol I don't even know where to start with him bc from a Watsonian perspective, he was awful to Miles, but the writing for him was so bizarre and bad that I feel like I have to critique it as a Doylist analysis? Like, I get he has to be in conflict with Miles, but why did they write him passively believing Miguel (I know he was there for the universe collapse, but that was one case), why was he written like a comic relief man child who didn't treat anything seriously, what was with him not doing a damn thing when two teenagers were being treated like shit, and then he goes home and just starts whining about boohoo, maybe I'm a bad mentor while the two teenagers who are supposed to be his friends are obviously in danger? He was like a completely different character from ITSV! And if you just take all of that as well, that's just how he is in universe, then Miles would have every right to tell him to fuck off.

And yeah, my worry with Margo is that she might end up as the disposable Black girlfriend bc she is definitely not going to be the end game love interest at this point, so I hope I am wrong, but I hope we don't get her sacrificing herself for Miles, even as a digital avatar, out of her crush on him, and then he goes off with Gwen; and yeah, I feel like with Jessica, the last moments of ATSV seemed to be hinting at her changing her mind and siding with Miles and the others, but the cast is so packed that I'm worried she will just be there for 'sassy' lines and whatever happens with the baby, and idk if this is an unpopular opinion, but I wish they hadn't bothered with the baby for various reasons.

They were so wrong for letting that version of Gwen's father live, even though I get the plot reason, like, he sucks in every timeline bc he's a cop, but that's the worst one, and we had to put up with that awful turbo copaganda scene, even though I know it's word for word right out of the comics.

[dorotama]

The Dororo thing is so real, I think its so interesting how Kururu and Dororo both have odd ones out loners spying on their friends vibes but Kururu actually hangs out with them very often and Dororo is an actual loner. I cant remember if this gag was present in the early seasons now that I think about it but he literally starts leaving a cardboard cutout of himself instead of going to the meetings. Which like can you even blame him. I think one more little part of it is like, do you want to invite the guy who doesnt want to invade to the invasion meeting just for him to get upset? Dororo might even be aware considering the cutout but then he can still come across a bit like why didnt you invite me to the cause distress to the planet party :( Kind of a silly situation. Theres a stupid manga panel where he has a goddamn wooden computer. There was a relatively recent chapter where Keroro got a goddamn catgirl vtuber avatar made by Kururu so he could stream and all the others were blushing watching him and Dororo pulled out a phone?! Its the exact same as Kururus but with his symbol put on it instead of Kururus so I imagined Kururu might have gotten him that. I cant imagine he knows anything but taking pictures. Actually it might be a bad idea to accept a phone from Kururu but that might depend on the day. It seems I would gullibly accept anything he gives me

Not inviting Dororo places might be more egregious in the manga because I think Koyuki lives like in the next house over but I dont think it gets mentioned a lot? But I also dont remember if the universe is quite as cartoonishly mean to him in the manga. Early seasons vs later seasons vs manga is real hard to keep track of when you start thinking about it. Another autistic thing they added to Kururu later is that he starts making nyo noises almost as much as ku noises, he can say nyo? when surprised, he snores nyoooonyooo when he sleeps, he can sing nyoonyonyonyooo when pressing buttons, hell say nyo! anytime just because, even makes a nyaa once, and generally makes progressively crazier sillier sounds because the voice actor started adlibbing like crazy. It kind of ends up reading like him relaxing and opening up compared to him getting called gloomy before. Oh my God I get so carried away so quickly talking about those frogs

THIS IS ALL SO CRAZY. when you've had a series thats been going for so long its bound to get pretty inconsistent and pretty crazy after a while LOL... the sheer amount of episodes and the extreme variation in quality is partially why i stick to the funimation dub (and a handful of the comics). im the type of autistic who watches and rewatches over and over and likes to be able to memorize the episodes - enough to have at least a vague idea of the scenes in sequence in every episode.... when you have like 300+ episodes and 5 movies combined with spinoffs and an ungodly amount of manga that's just not feasible. there are a handful of other reasons why i consider myself "funimation dub exclusive" (mostly due to the fact that i just prefer the voice acting, characterization and sense of humor)

OF COURSE KERORO WOULD BE A VTUBER. and kululu would be able to make him an avatar in like 45 minutes flat. i kind of subconciously bring them into the modern era in a lot of ways - mostly just because i think its funny to imagine keroro forcing tamama to venmo him 10 yen for taking a sip from his latte or something. there's always so much comedic plot potential with these guys its like they can squeeze an episode out of anything

ive seen bits and pieces of the cardboard cutout thing... i think its very sweet and kind of sad. like most things to do with dororo. hes like obsessed with them while also wanting nothing to do with them. he wants to be part of their group but he cant bring himself to do anything but watch from afar...like..... maybe.... from a window. hypothetically maybe even from a window in a mansion. everything always goes back to his childhood somehow

the wooden computer bit is seriously sending me into hysterics. do you think he carved it himself. does it have windows 98 on it. do you think it's powered by a squirrel running on a wheel

I THINK IVE ALSO SEEN BITS AND PIECES OF THE NYO THING. thats adorable. they keep giving him vocal stims. i love it when he says "clicky" or "clicky-poo" in the dub when he presses a button its so funny and cute

[beesmygod]

its embarrassing to talk about this but more than one person has brought it up since i said it: a while back i mentioned that its hard for me to read or receive compliments. this in itself is a statement that should elicit groans, eye-rolls and jerking off motions bc its more often then not a means of fishing for compliments without wanting to be seen as the kind of crass bum wants something for nothing. please believe me when i say its not this lol.

the way i mentioned it doesnt get the situation across and i havent see people discuss this outside of like revolution-era russian literature: compliments about my work causes a sensation like getting stabbed in the gut with a hot knife. i did not have comments on "a ghost story" from 2013 until 2020 out of fear of inviting that sensation into my life on purpose. also because it felt egomaniacal but thats a different kettle of fish lol. mostly its because it genuinely hurt physically enough that i didnt want to.

i've been trying to take some of the drama out of trying to explain this stupid problem for the last few days (and most of my life) because it's ridiculous lol. its inherently irrational and feeling like nice comments are METAPHORICALLY KILLING ME over a web comic where a ghost blows his penis off with a firecracker should get one laughed off the internet. i dont really want to hear anyone argue to the contrary because we need to accept this baseline of reality lol. and its not EVERY comment. there are specific comments i cant look at on my blog from when i left hive bc they caused it so bad

it feels like someone grabbing a nerve in my gut and pulling it like they're trying to close a window shade. it feels bad. it hits something that instantly activates embarrassing and confusing tears from the sensation. i am so appreciative that most of the comments i get have turned out to be jokes, speculation, kind remarks that dont come with the pain.

i dont want people to be put off on commenting! iread and appreciate them deeply and try to respond to make people laugh! the hurt being caused isn't by you or anything you say; it's being caused by the knife in my gut, being pulled out slowly. some day, it wont be there any more

[jordanlisgirlfriend]

The things we cannot see

Pairing: Jordan Li x reader

warning: not proofread, eventual smut

summary: after hooking up with jordan right before the summer you are trying to navigate how to be friends with the only person you've ever loved.

The campus used to be so much more intimidating during my first year, but over the course of my first year it became so small. As I made my way through the herd of freshmen looking for their dorms, pushing and shoving into each other trying to make it to my own room. With all the chaos around me, I feel my face make contact with another girl's face. I pull back a bit to put some  distance between us, to get a better look at her face. Her beautiful brown eyes expanded like a deer caught headlights. I offer a smile to diffuse the awkwardness to no end.

“Oh god, I’m so sorry. It's just so busy here and everyone was pushing into each other, and it's so chaotic, I’m so sorry” she said also immediately to try and explain away the situation, it was almost comical how she was tripping over her words. “ its quite alright,  I usually prefer when people buy me dinner before they try to kiss me sweetheart” “oh that’s not what I was doing, I swear, I didn’t mean to kiss you” “ relax, it was just a joke. The first day is always brutal in these hallways, so expect to kiss a few strangers, good thing i happened to kiss a cute one at least” she started to blush uncontrollably. I have always been a flirt but not in order to get into peoples pants it was more of a way to connect with people instantly. People loved to be complimented, so by default they automatically liked me. “ I’m y/n by the way, we’ve kissed the least I can do is introduce myself” “ Marie. I’ve been walking in circles and i think i can officially consider myself lost because i cant seem to find my dorm” she hands me the piece of paper she is holding for me to check it out. “ oh this was my dorm was my dorm last year, you are on the wrong floor. I grab her hand and lead her to the staircase. “Oh my god, you are a live saver,  i owe you one, whatever you need let me know and i mean anything at all.”

“ I’ll hold you to that” you wave her off heading toward the staircase once again.

After settling into your dorm, you decide to head to the indoor training gym, assuming everyone would be out on the field watching golden boy. The freshmen were always obsessing over him. The gym was quiet so you decide to work on your agility and endurance, running over the same drills repeated enjoying the complete silence except for your heavy breathing. You were so zoned in you didn’t even notice Jordan standing next to your target practice, almost blasting into him. “Fuck dude, I could’ve seriously hurt you.” They looked  at me smugly, “Not with those weak blasts, I think I'll be just fine.” You turn away from them and try to get back to your training. “ you’ve been avoiding me, and i know you are going to say that you haven’t but I know that its not just all in my head because every time we had planned to meet up over the summer you were magically busy or something came up, yet you had time to hang out with everyone else except for me.”  you stop in your tracks and turn to face them. “ first off I’m not avoiding you, just wanted to give us both a bit of space, a cooling period if you will. I had to for both our sakes because nothing like that can ever happen again, you know that right?” “ what I know is that we hooked up, so what, its not that big of a deal and we can move past it can’t we? You are my best friend, i wouldn’t want to do anything to mess that up, but its a lot harder to have a friendship when it feels like you are a thousand miles away.” Jordan moves in closer holding out there hands for you to hold. In their female form their hands are almost the same size as yours, you hesitantly interlock their fingers with yours. You thought that with 3 months away from Jordan your feelings would have settle but the moment your hands made connect all you could think about was the warmth radiating from their body and what you do to be wrapped up in them once again. “ I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to be so distant just needed the time and space to sort somethings out, because you are one of Andre’s bestfriends before you are mine and it would just be so selfish of me to not only ruin our friendship but also yours and Andre’s. I had to think and I do love being your friend but not exactly sure how to do that right now without it being awkward. It will take me a moment to adjust, so just give me some time.” Jordan was looking at you so intensely that you felt your insides turning, under their stare you became a nervous mess, the butterflies in your stomach were erupting. So you stepped back breaking the eye contact and letting go of their hand as if the closeness to them might lead to you doing something stupid again so instead you choose to break the tension. “ do you want to train with me? I could use some help” “ I would but I’ve got to go catch up on some work for Brink, how about we meet up tomorrow at like 8pm in here, the gym should be empty” you start to panic, you could not under any circumstances be alone in a room with Jordan motherfucking Li, it simply could not happen. You knew you would mess up and you would mess up big time. “ could we do 6 pm instead? I’ve got dinner with the family tomorrow” you said lying through your teeth. “ yeah I guess 6 is alright” they say as they head for the door, waving you off. You fall onto the mat, laying there for a second and all you could think was fuck I’m screwed. 

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