#also its a pain in my ass to always think about making every piece a portfolio piece instead of just a practice or even idk dumb sketches

[cottoncandybitchfuck]

Unsleeping City Quotes I Like

“Magic is Real and you get to see it. Isn’t that great?” -Misty Moore

“Sometimes you gotta do the nice thing, not the right thing” -Kingston Brown

“You know, just kind of when you’re already in a shame spiral and then people are good to you, it almost stings a little bit worse.” -Pete Conlan

“Things are not always what you want them to be, and they’re not always what you dream they are. Things are what they are.” -Jackson Wei 

“It does not diminish a soul to give worship or adoration”-Nod

“Being the founder is not the same as being a leader” -Nod

“You’re not done yet kid. Come on. We got work to do” -Kingston Brown

“You’d have to be a real asshole not to recognize when someone is trying to not be a piece of shit in general. And I don’t know that we’re good, but that doesn’t mean that you’re not good. And… I guess you’re worth helping.” -David Kugrich

“Because honestly if you don’t show up now, there might not be anyone to fuckin’ choose ever again. So then you’ll have had this little gift you could have given to someone, this little ‘choosing’ you could have done, and you will never do it to anyone. It’s like letting food go bad, I hate when people let food go bad.” -Sofia Lee

“The true spirit of this place is to meet dreams with concrete. To hustle in the muck and the grime, and to grind away to make something miraculous happen, and that the spirit of this place is that these people make it happen for themselves.”-Brennan Lee Mulligan about NYC

“There is nothing more in the spirit of this place than to rely on nobody but yourself to decide that you will be chosen.” -Brennan Lee Mulligan about Sofia Lee

“You want to be someone’s everything, and you’re everybody’s everything. Made it real hard to feel special.” -Liz Herrera 

“I can’t visit everybody. That’s also because not everybody is worth visiting.” -Kingston Brown

“Just because I have to be something for everybody doesn’t mean I can’t be something more for you.” -Kingston Brown

“If somebody would fuckin’ teach me how to do magic, I’d come help you whoop ass. I’m from the fuckin’ Bronx” -Liz Hererra

“I can’t have what you’re offering me, and that’s my fault. But American Dreams change.” -Kugrash

“My Love. For you are my love. My one true love. You don’t need to enter, for you’re already there. And you don’t need to be real because you already are real.” -Rowan Berry to the American Dream

“Dreams changing with the minds of their dreamers, is the most beautiful aspect of dreams. When you look to see the true form of this, what you see is that a dream this important and this large needs to be able to change. And its true form, is any and every form that people want from it. And if it is pushed back through the golden door, into the realm where it can have any form that people give to it, that is where it will have its true form. So the answer to your Nat 20 is that the only good form for a dream is formless.” -Brennan Lee Mulligan about the American Dream

“It is what it is”-Dale “And what it is, is anything”-Nod

“Greed is good, for rat motherfuckers like Robert Moses. But not in our town, not in our fucking city!” -Kugrash

“Pain is a part of healing. And the things we’ve lost should hurt. But it does not mean that we are defeated or they will hurt forever.” -Em from Bethesda Fountain

“These sacrifices are never made in vain. All these people, their lives are our lives, and ours are theirs. All intertwined together. I think that’s kinda beautiful.” -Em

“It’s not really what happens, but it’s your reaction to it and how you feel, that’s what you should pay attention to.” -Pete Conlan

[mothmanipulator]

vent in tags

[enden-k]

I've been following you since before you started Genshin, back when you were doing Fate/Grand Order art. I've stuck with your art as you've jumped from fandom to fandom, and I love your style so much... BOTH old and new style. But I think the fact that you are just so nonchalant about deleting anything old you ever make to the point of encouraging others to like your own content JUST so you can delete it is just too much for me. I've seen you encourage that at least twice now. That is actually discouraging for people when it comes to engaging with content. Someone liking a piece and engaging with it increases it's chances of deletion? I can't understand.

Yes, sure, it's your work. You do it for free. At the end of the day it's your choice what happens to it. But it pains me to see you delete anything old, even works of yours I enjoy. I'm considering unfollowing, as much as I want to see you continue on your art journey even when it jumps to fandoms unfamiliar, because I can't get attached to your work when I have no idea when it's going to disappear from the internet forever at any point.

??? im not encouraging people to like my old stuff so i can delete it, and people liking my stuff doesnt increase its chance of deletion. i tend to joke to hide the fact that it actually DOES make me a bit nervous but there is STILL plenty of my old things on tumblr, twitter and pixiv. most of the stuff i deleted were old ass replies to make navigation easier. and most of the art pieces i deleted are ones i either made while in very bad mental space or because i connect unpleasant memories of certain people with it (im not vagueing anyone here, we go separate ways)

i also sometimes just forget about things i meant to delete later or find pieces that make me feel uncomfortable/embarrassed and i have every right to delete those. im still insecure about my art and i get uncomfortable when people compliment me too much bc it still feels undeserving. it always was like this. sometimes its so bad i just want to delete my entire blog and never pick up a pen again. its not often anymore that i react like this but sometimes i get this violent reaction when i see "faulty" old art of mine i feel very embarrassed about. perfection is bs ofc etcetc but when it comes to my own things i get embarrassed when people see my faults or rlly bad art and i dont want anyone to make fun of me again, to laugh at me for making a mistake or being bad at something ever fucking again.

you want to see my old art? here you go. its still here. its all here.

if you want to unfollow me, please, go ahead. people can do whatever they want and im not forcing anyone here to stay. do whatever feels right and comfortable to you, thats the most important thing.

[inventors-fair]

First Pickable: Typal Winners ~

Our winners for this week are @helloijustreadyourpost, @reaperfromtheabyss and @tanknspank!

@helloijustreadyourpost — Score of a Lifetime

This one is absolutely sold for me. I assume that this is a Capenna-themed card? I mean, considering the scored, I'd say so, so as to avoid the batching that something like OTJ had. All the same, there are a LOT of Rogues there, and a lot of colors. Maybe this could've even been a Treasure, right? But regardless, having a little bit of every color get a little bit of roguishness is pretty much on the nose for what we're looking for mechanically. There was that one artifact from VOW that made a creature unblockable with a bonus for Vampires, but that wouldn't be as fought over. This card, though? I love the evasive theme that everyone would seek if there are indeed rogues, well, everywhere.

And the flavor text is pretty awesome too—which is what fully sells me on the card, because you're expressing a whole lot of possibilities here. The first is that a thief's life is short because of their field of work, but the other is that being "set for life" could just be a temporary measure, and that the rogue would squander it and impulsively go on to the next job—not for the money, but for the thrill. That's a way more esoteric read than I think is necessary, but dammit, it's speaking to me, so I'm going to roll with it. Nobody can stop me!

@reaperfromtheabyss — Sentry's Shortsword

My first thought was that this could be an excellent Kaldheim card, but then I remembered the Artificer example from the beginning of the week, and then yeah, okay, this could also be a more military-oriented card from Kaladesh. That was a really weird thought for me, especially because I remember Kaladesh's dwarves as being pilots and tinkerers, not as much soldiers. But my imagination is running ahead of me. In some ways...isn't that a good thing? Maybe I do like specificity and pounded-into-the-forge worldbuilding. With a set like this, there could be some story behind it to push it in either direction.

That's very cool. That's very cool indeed. As an equipment, this card's on the aggressive and defensive sides, and everyone who's ever played against Danitha in any form knows how much of a pain first strike and vigilance is. Perhaps I'm biased towards vigilance as a mechanic. It's equally possible that vigilance kicks ass and I'm correct and handsome and etc. Don't matter none when a dwarf is swinging at your face. I like the low-to-the-ground implication here, no pun intended, and how you linked the flavor of dwarves with the auto-equip. Like, to me that says something about how they're either readily weaponized or close to the forge? I like cards that make me prone to positive overthinking and this one gets the job done right.

@tanknspank — Sudden Swarming

As an annoying first critique, I will say that I wish the flavor text had been one sentence: "The two kings agreed to clash at dawn, but a neighboring queen arranged a temporary truce." That's about it. The image of these armies fleeing at the behest of a cloud of annoyed bugs is punny, hilarious, and a great use of an underused mechanical space, in my opinion. Does anyone love Fogs? Well, no, because they haven't made a good one in a kajillion years. Is this one of the best Fogs ever? I mean, I think so, but mostly because I'm a jerk.

And also, like, there could be one single Insect or Insect-themed card in this whole draft set, and it wouldn't have any payoff except for this one card, but this one card would be a single sideboard piece in most decks. Someone might want to start building Insects in standard and be disappointed, and/or add it to their Grist commander deck. That's what cards like this should be about, and this is both a hilarious use of the prompt and a great use of this kind of spot overall. Puns don't always get me in design, but this one sure does. A card that stands on its own merits is a card I can get behind.

Runners up 'n coming. @abelzumi

[cosmicanemoia]

Nobody Like You

Larissa Weems x Reader

Chapter 2 (What's Settled?)

SUMMARY

The first few months of your relationship were going well until something shifted.

The first few months of your relationship were going well until something shifted. She shifted... into another woman, and flirts with you. When she shifted back to her true self she would ask you all sorts of questions, almost as if she's interrogating you- trying to catch you in a lie, but to her dismay, or pleasure, or whatever, you had always told her everything truthfully.

Your relationship with Larissa had become complicated. You have an off again on again thing with her. You don't know what scarred her so bad that she would break your heart as if it were so easily healed.

*

Larissa and Morticia had a thing back when they were still students at nevermore.

Whatever that thing is, it broke Larissa in the most painful and invisible way, and the scars will come to bite her in the ass in the most heart shattering way.

They had the best of times together, but Morticia slowly lost time for Larissa.

When Morticia announced that she and gomez were in a relationship... Larissa's heart shattered into tiny pieces coursing through her body like shards of broken glass digging and cutting at her insides.

She had to put up a wall so as to never let it happen again.

Whatever that thing Larissa and Morticia had had ended.

And it only became clear to Larissa that it was one sided-- whatever it was she thought they both felt was actually unrequited.

*

Whatever it is she's doing now is just her trying to protect her even more fragile heart, also to make sure you keep your promise.

You know how badly she was scarred, that's why you  understand why she does what she's doing. Little did you know it will cost you your heart as well...

Larissa had scarred you in the most pleasant and unpleasant way.

She doesn't know why she's doing this and what she would get out of all this. Her insecurities and doubts took hold of her.

-

"Why do you have to be so young?" Larissa would often ask you, and you would reply with "I'm not too young. You're not too old. We are just right, baby... We're perfect for each other."

She would believe those words for some time, but when some nosy people brought up your age gap- she would need reassurances, and you would always be there for that.

But when phrases and sentences are continuously used, endlessly repeated-- it would eventually lose its meaning, no? Her doubts would grow, and she could only think that you would somehow grow tired of her too.

"How can someone so fucking beautiful and wonderful care about what other people think? You are a goddess amongst us mere mortals. I don't understand why you give a damn about them." You argued.

She answered, "Well, my partner is also a goddess herself. How can I not? When she could change her mind any minute of every hour?"

You were on the verge of tears. You can't fathom how someone as mesmerizing as she is would be insecure about something so trivial as your age gap.

You want to cry, but instead chuckled at her declaration. You saunter to close the distance between the two of you, and pull her into your arms to give her that much needed embrace along with more words of reassurances. "My love. Please see yourself as I see you. You're the only one I need, and the only one I will ever truly need. You're the most precious person to me, and I could not even bear the thought of losing you, let alone abandon you."

Larissa hummed at the nook of your neck as you hugged her tighter.

And if words aren't enough... well, then you just have to show her.

--

"We're actually in an exclusive and closed relationship." You told the other woman, and she breaks out in a boisterous laugh. She saw how you tensed up and how Larissa's grip on your waists tightened; her laugh turned into an awkward chuckle, and she scoffed, "seriously?" She questioned, and you just nodded as a response while you looked lovingly at Larissa. "The 'succubus' in a monogamous and closed relationship. Wow!" She exclaimed.

'The nerve of this woman.' You thought to yourself.

She grinned from ear to ear and gave an unwanted comment to Larissa, "I don't know what you got that every woman she'd ever been with doesn't... Must be good enough to sate and satisfy the sex hungry that she is."

You rolled your eyes, "Okay, we're done here... let's go babe."

As you walk away the woman shouted, "I meant that as a compliment."

You told Larissa that you jump from girlfriend to girlfriend and that you never entertain the idea of dating exclusively until you met her.

"Alright then-- that's settled." Larissa leaned back on the couch as she sighed.

"What's settled?" You leaned forward to her direction as your hand found home on her thighs.

She replied, "Nothing." She looked away, and you squeezed her thigh softly to make her look at you and that she did.

As your gaze held each other, you told her, "Come on, gorgeous. I'm not a mind reader... tell me what's bothering you."

Larissa sighed and spoke, "have you been sleeping with other women while you were dating me?" She released a breath she didn't know she were holding.

You inhaled deeply and moved closer to her. "No. Never. Of course I haven't." Your hands moved to cup her cheeks, and you caress them with your thumb.

Larissa looked into your eyes and saw no lies in them.

"I get why you would think that given my track record, but I assure you- I have not slept with other women nor think of doing so ever since we got together." You remarked, and you give her a kiss to which she desperately accepted.

After a passionate kiss. "I apologise for that my darling, it was silly of me to think that you were--" Larissa remarked, but before she can finish her thought you cut her off.

"It wasn't silly at all. I understand why you would think that. I know just the thing to help erase all the worries in your head." You declared and signalled her to straddle your lap. "You, Larissa Weems, is the only one for me. And you're more than enough. I am so grateful, and I feel so lucky I get to have you." You added and give her a quick peck on her plump lips. "Larissa Weems. You are everything I never thought I needed and more." You exclaimed, which made her grin widely.

If those words weren't enough to ease her mind; you'll have to just show her again.

---

Someone had asked you infront of Larissa once again...One would find this funny, yet they wouldn't be able to laugh because of how cruel it is-- that someone had mentioned your age gap one more time.

"That's it. I can't do this anymore." Larissa said as she stood.

You look at her with confusion written in your face, "can't do what, babe?"

Larissa's voice is laced with anger and sadness as she replies, "This..." She points her pointer finger to you then to herself back and front, and she continues to argue, "people asking you out infront of me. Maybe they were right!? Maybe you are indeed too young for me..."

"What!? Baby, please... not this again. I told you--" you try to reassure her, but she cuts you off.

"No. No more. This is not going to happen again and again. This is the last time." Larissa sighed.

You scoff and stand up to take her hand. You were in a flustered state. Your brows furrowed in understanding. You think you know where this is going, but still you asked, "what do you mean?"

Larissa took her hand from your grip, and she looked away... she took a deep breath and said, "I'm done. We're done."

"Okay. Let's go home." You remarked as you thought this can't be it; still trying to deny what's happening. 'This can't be it.' You thought to yourself.

Larissa replied, "no. There's no us-- not anymore. We're over." She starts to walk out the door...

Your jaw clenched, and you thought, "no freaking way." You got infront of her to try and stop her, "you can't be serious... are you serious?"

"I am." Larissa answered in a monotone voice.

Your eyes filled with tears, and it broke Larissa seeing you like this, and she knows she's the reason why. 'Maybe I didn't think this through.' She thought to herself.

"Darling love, please... don't go." You begged her.

Larissa shoved you gently out of the way, "please, don't make this harder than it already is." With that, she's out the door and out of your life as well.

You can't believe what just happened. You want to follow her, but your feet are glued to the ground. You gaze around the café and realised that everyone is watching you, and you growled to no one and everyone at the same time, "Fucking hell! Am I right?" Then you start to break down on the floor.

After a few minutes, the tears have dried, and you definitely need to get out of here.

You let a day pass until you decided to get your girl back.

Your knock echoes loudly within Larissa's space, and when she opens the door and sees you, she says as if she were expecting you, "are you here to get your things back?"

You didn't answer her question, but instead question her in turn. "May I come in?"

She moved aside signaling you to come in.

After a moment of comfortable yet tense silence, you start to speak as you stare into her eyes, "the only thing I came to get back here... is you."

"Darling, I--" Larissa tried to speak.

But you quickly cut her off, "Larissa dear, just listen to me, and if you want me to go after, I will."

"Sure." She replied.

You follow her on the sofa, and as you lovingly look at her, you can tell that she had been crying too.

You took her hands into yours, and as you hold it, you declared, "correct me if I'm wrong, but I know you didn't mean what you said back then. I understand that you were hurting. This can't be over... we can't be over. I can't go another day without you, and is it cruel that I hope you do too? Please, honey... Larissa Weems, take me back."

You let Larissa think for a moment, but after a while of staring into anything but you... you get her point. You nod yourself in understanding.

As you stand, Larissa uttered the words you've been aching to hear. "Yes." She said softly.

The tears that have been threatening to fall make good on that threat. You break down in tears, and as you come to hug her, you see that she is crying as well. You both missed each other so much.

You both hugged each other tightly and sighed simultaneously in relief.

You stayed cuddled, and you both fell asleep at the warmth of each other's embrace.

----

"WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK!?" You muttered at the scene unfolding before you.

Larissa is as shocked as you are. You aren't supposed to find out, at least not this way. Plus, your wounds are still fresh.

Fate is such a cruel thing sometimes, isn't it?

You look at her with wide eyes; too stunned to speak. You try to form words, but you just can't.

Larissa heaves, and your eyes decided to follow her figure striding closer to you.

"Oh my god..." you were able to breathe out when she held your hands.

"I can explain." Larissa said frantically.

You huffed, "there's  no need to explain-- it's pretty obvious."

You can see Larissa moving her lips, but you can't hear a word she's saying. "Larissa, I can't hear a word you're saying. Give me a moment to let this sink in."

You didn't know how you got to the couch, and your hand just took the wine that was set infront of you. "I can't believe you would do something like that... to me---"

"Darling, please." Larissa pleads.

"Trying to catch me in a lie? When you're the one who has been lying. Shifting into another woman??? Then relentlessly flirts with me... and afterwards ask me all sorts of questions-- as Larissa. Why the hell would you do that?" You thought aloud.

"I don't know. I-- uh, I was just---" Larissa trailed off.

There was silence for far too long, and she couldn't take it anymore. "Say something, Darling." Larissa found you still in silence after her request.

"Well, I guess this is really it. I screwed everything up. I guess you would only want to be free of me, of my possessiveness... and my doubtfulness." Larissa whined.

From that, you finally look at her, "what? Don't put words in my mouth."

Larissa stands up, "if you want to break up with me, I-"

"Hell no! You are indeed doubtful and possessive, no doubt. I'm not going to break up with you. Never. I only feel free when I'm with you." You stood your ground and breath a sigh of relief, which Larissa returned.

After a while, you chuckled, and Larissa's eyebrows furrowed. 'This is no laughing matter,' she thought to herself. You both plopped down on the couch.

When you see her face and see her worries, you say, "I accept everything that you are. I hope to erase any doubts lingering in that magnificent brain of yours."

"I only did that because I love you too much." Larissa confessed.

"Larissa Weems, I assure you I'm all yours. All yours." You said and gave her forehead a kiss.

-----

The day Larissa had been dreading the most had finally come.

Just as she's about to fully trust you...

How cannot you do this to her? And in her own fucking home, in her own fucking bed. How could you? After letting you in... After everything she had confided in you. She was right to doubt you she thought, 'how fucking dare you?!?'

Larissa could not believe what was in front of her. Her ears are ringing, and even though she wanted so badly to scream- she just stood there frozen and only able to mutter a "Y/N?"

Even if it's barely above a whisper, she knew you heard her and see you shuffle in bed.

"Larissa?" She saw stand up quickly, and she saw that it made your head spin.

Larissa slowly walks away...

"Wait... Larissa--" she heard you call for her, but before you could say much-

"Oh great! The crazy old lady is here." The woman you're naked in bed with chuckled.

"The fuck did you just call her?" Larissa heard you said as she whipped her head to the other woman. Then she turns to face you, and scoffed, "as if you don't believe what she just said."

"Leave her already." The other woman butted once again.

After that-- Larissa's alarm broke her out of her nightmare.

She heaves as she lies, then she feels you pressed against her back, hugging her softly, and it helps calm her a little. She inhaled sharply.

You felt her move away, so you tightened your hold on her, "Don't go yet, sweetie."

She scoffed and whined "FUCK YOU!"

"Later... I'm still sleepy." You replied, oblivious of her actual meaning.

She stands up and walks back and forth just before the edge of the bed.

You slowly open your eyes to see where she went, and when you see the state that she was in; you decided to sit up as worry washes over you. "Honey, what's wrong?"

Larissa stops pacing, and just stares at you... After a moment, she growled and accused, "You're sleeping with someone else."

"What? Of course I'm not." You denied, "where is this coming from?"

"I saw you in that very bed naked with another woman..."

You stand up and move closer to Larissa, but when you see her back off, you halted. "That's absurb! It's completely impossible because I'm not really sleeping with anyone else. Where did you-"

"You need to go." Larissa commanded.

"No." You said sternly as you softly look at her, and this time, when you move closer, she didn't move away, and you were finally able to hold her hand.

Larissa just looks at you with an unreadable expression, but her eyes say everything that you need to know.

She's hurt, and the problem is she won't tell you.

"Just go Y/N." Larissa said as she looked away.

You let go of her hand, and scratch your furrowed brows. "I never even want or even try to sleep with other women ever since I saw you. Even if we're on a break or have broken up or whatever. You're all I needed."

"I don't know what else to say." Larissa sighed.

"You really trust other people more than me." You cried.

"it's not that..." She denied.

"Yeah! Yeah-- whatever you say." You move closer to her, and you cup her cheeks with the palm of your hands... while your forehead touches, "is this really it?" A tear fell from your eye.

"It is." Larissa confirmed.

Larissa moves to kiss you passionately, cause it is really the last time she will do so, you both thought.

The sobs you've been suppressing have been set free into the kiss. And when she pulled away, you couldn't help but sob harder. "Please don't make me leave. I need you, and I know you need me as much. Please- Larissa, my love, whatever the problem is, let's work and solve it out together. Please, Larissa, I don't want to be apart from you."

Larissa slowly turned and started to walk away without even looking back.

She left you sobbing alone. It's as if you died in that moment. If your heart is an actual glass, it would have shattered into a million pieces, and those tiny pieces would pierce you from the inside as it flows through your veins, making it hard to breathe... and live. This might be what death by a thousand cuts means. Only in your case, you're still breathing, even after a million cuts.

You may not see it, but Larissa feels the same, and if she turns her back and sees you in that state, she knows she'll run to embrace you. You don't know that she's as broken as you by her actions. All you know is that there's something inherently wrong with you that she doesn't want you anymore.

'This is your house... why the hell did you walk away.'

You waited for a week, but never once did she come back, not even for a set of clothes. 'I really need to go.'

With all the strength you have left you left, without bothering to get your things.

[kunosoura]

top 5 ships

I'm not a huge nerd for like sailing/space flight/etc so when we're talking ships the ones I like the most are more for what they Represent. So in no particular order:

The S.S. Stormborn from Naddpod, I just love the story beat of an orphan learning about his parents and taking up his father's place on the helm of his old ship

The Bebop (and every scifi ship that's like "this is a piece of shit like fishing/shipping/industrial ship converted for use as both a home and a workhorse for a group of grey market mercenaries trying to eke out a living in the stars)

Arsenal Gear from MGS2. There's something about that completely impractical and overblown sort of scifi maximalism prompting people to make impractically huge floating fortresses that I simply adore.

In what is I guess the complete opposite of the last example, The Lookfar from Earthsea. One boat that can comfortably fit maybe two people and the endless potential of the seas stretching in every direction.

That one flying ship from pokemon the movie 2000 no thematic notes here I just thought it was sick as fuck as a kid

You're probably actually asking about my favorite fictional relationships (canon or theoretical), I don't do fandom type shipping stuff that much but here's what I got for you. Maybe not top five, no particular order, but I think about these a lot.

Madohomu. You might have seen this coming. Girl with something wrong with her x girl with something wrong with her. Aloof facade hiding mountains of pain x emotions worn on the sleeve in the face of incomprehensible horror. Incompatible self sacrifice complexes. No possible happy ending.

Narusasu. You probably also saw this one coming. It's a perfect tragedy. Naruto really was the only person who understood Sasuke's pain, and he used that influence to win him back to subservience to liberalism and away from in any meaningful way changing the system that had forced them both to endure isolation and nightmares as children. Then they fucked off to the least happy heterosexual marriages in the world. Sublime.

Franklin and Charlie from Merrily We Roll Along. You know that old saying about how some men ruin the lives of every woman they love because their soulmate is a man? Franklin Shepard is the gay Sondheim character, NOT Bobby (who I will go to my grave saying is and has always been intended as a straight man). He got caught in a raid on a Greenwich village and had to get counseling in the 60s ffs like that's like textual!!! When his first wife is brought up he's a little bitter in the easy ough bitch ex wife taking all my money way but apparently bringing Charlie up after their alienation is a surefire way to get him in a horrible mood. The story is to me all but textually about a man driving himself further and further into the closet so he can succeed in Hollywood.

aw man you guys can't make fun of me for this one you have to promise but I still find monica/chandler cute. Like yeah largely nowadays I consider friends to be an extremely dated show that is all but unwatchable because of how much it relies on a style of tv storytelling that has all but died out and how it stretched the few decent things it had over way too many seasons and also its shitty politics. But I still like the monica/chandler relationship. It's cute and they're sweet.

I don't know if I'd say this is an all timer for me but lately I've been really sort of savoring the dynamic between Ssrin and Anna from Exordia. There's so much sensuality between them whenever they're on the page together. Really saves that book from the endless mire of drama between those two gay ass cops.

[bellysoupset]

How I organize this blog.

This is a post specifically for writers and kink-writers. I'm gonna be talking about how *I* organize my stuff and a system that I feel works well.

It doesn't mean my way is the only way, but it IS a way I've found manageable and as someone with 200+ fics, being easy to navigate is my number 1 concern.

Under the cut 👇

Tagging system

This is my touchstone, my everything in this blog. I have three "categories" of tags I use.

Character Tag: So I tag my sickee in every fic. JUST the sickee/whumped charcter. I try to use the full name (Lucas Atwood) or the nickname that is easier to come to mind (Vince Monacelli).

Why is this important? One day you're going to get an anon saying "hey I'd really like to read all your fics with John". And then you'll have to go and hunt for all your fics with John. One day you'll be writing something and be like "is Mary allergic to peanuts?" and then you'll want to go back and read just the Mary fics. This WILL happen and you'll be glad you can just click the "Mary" tag and go through all your Mary fics.

Organization Tag: I use #mywriting for every single fic I write, tiny or large. Other tags I also use #myocs for all questions I get regarding them and #ocsfaces for everything I've ever posted regarding their appearance. I also use #meta for everything regarding the act of writing.

Why is it important? Sometimes you'll want to reblog other creators' works or you'll go on an answering asks spree and then suddenly, if someone was to stumble in your blog, your writing is actually in page 3 or 4. This is why #mywriting is important, so people can go straight to that, sorted by the most recent piece. Also, updating your masterlist is a pain in the ass, but tagging is easy. You WILL get asks about your OCs eye color, height, whatever, this is the reason for the other two tags.

Please Notice Me Tags: Well, I write sick fics, so everything is tagged #sickfic, #emetophilia, #flu... etc etc. This is just so other likeminded people will find your stuff in the tag! It can also serve as an organization tag if you remember that you always tag "#stomach flu", but I sometimes flip flop between how to tag each illness so in my case is not for organization, is more for marketing reasons.

Why is it important? Well, you put time and effort into this! You want people to read it <3

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Pinned Post

This is already common practice around these lands, but here are some things I think are important.

Add your tags (character and organization, only. Not the marketing tags) to your pinned post, so you can easily find them. My pinned post has every character I have tagged, because its easier for ME to navigate my own blog this way.

Please, for the love of god, assign a name to yourself. It doesn't have to be your name, hell it doesn't have to be even A name, it can be "Book/Seven/Cool Dog Name", it just makes it so much easier to interact with other creators when I don't have to call them "kinkmasteremeto102" every time I reblog from them.

Either have your masterlist under a "read more" in your pinned post or add a link to it. I recommend having a link to your masterlist, it has worked to me and this way you can reblog the masterlist without having to reblog your pinned post with more personal info every time.

If there's something you absolutely don't write, don't want requests, this is the place to put it! Make it clear from the get go to avoid exhausting interactions.

In my case I know people mostly come to my blog for emeto, so I mark my fics that have no emeto with **, but that's just personal preference, it doesn't actually make my life easier.

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Archive

One day, maybe next week, maybe in six months, another tumblr scare "the website is going down" will happen. And then you'll freak out and cry, if you're like me and doesn't wanna lose your fics in case this website goes up in smoke.

I HIGHLY recommend saving your fics elsewhere, as well as tumblr. Not to have a reader base there, just for safety. Here are some options:

Archiveofourown, tagged as original work: it's a fucking hassle to put up, but if you're starting to post works, it's actually very easy to maintain. In my case, with 200+ fics it didn't work bc I didn't have the patience to upload all of them there, but as a creator who still has a small number and working your way up, I think this is a good one!

Google Drive. Scary, I know, because Google is watching over you, but this is the method that worked for me. Here's how I do it: have a google account JUST for my kink stuff, that has no ties whatsoever to my real person. Not the security email, not a similar password, nothing. Only use it in an anonymous tab and then you can use the entire Drive Suite to upload your fics in a big document, your OC info in a google sheet, etc etc.

Waybackmachine. I haven't actually ever used this one, but I know its an internet archive and you can take "snapshots" of your blog, so they're saved there forever. Unsure how it works, though.

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Oh ANOTHER thing. Always tag your anons if they sign their stuff. I know it's common practice already, but doesn't hurt to reiterate.

If you get an ask signed as - 🙈anon, tag the fic/request/answer with "# 🙈 anon" as well, this way the anon can later easily find their question in your blog. 💛

If anyone has a question regarding this in specific, my askbox is always open.

[osarina]

CARINA CARINA CARINA its like nearly midnight right now and i jsut finished reading uu4 and omg 😭 i love it so so much. i alr knew i would love it but i just loved it even more just reading it. i love how we are slowly piecing together dazai and what he does or something among the lines and dazais nervousness. i just fall more and more in love with beastzai and how much he just cares for us, his concern his anxiety about everything relating to us.

THE ANKLE KISS IM WEAK FOR THAT 😭

THE CLIFFHANGER TOO I CANT I CANT. GO SWAY FYDOOR YOURE RUINING THE HAPPINESS 💔💔 he’s making me scared for what’s going to come or what’s going to happen because HE is a big threat especially with the way you worded it. dazai come back pls 🙏🏻 chuuya come back 🙏🏻 tachihara hurry up your ass and get down there

im just waiting for you to break our hearts with angst for UU 😔 i’m trying to prepare myself but i don’t think i can prepare for carina writing dazai angst because you KILL me with angst <//33 i am looking forward to UU6 but also not because the dazai series will be over :(( and this has been one of my favourite series ever (ATU by mai is one of mine too 🤭🤭) IDJDJSJ im just going to be delusional and say that dazai and reader are happy married with kids and grow old and die like they did in the notebook NO SADNESS NO BROKEN HEARTS

the way you write has me so so entrapped and i love love your writing so so much. if you were to write your own story i would read it i love your writing that much. i know that you would make a great author if you ever were to become one. or if you ever make your own story and publish it here 👀👀

ALSO WJFJSJS IM SORRY IF I WROTE TOO MUCH

LARRRRR MY LOVE U COULD NEVER WRITE TOO MUCH IM SORRY THAT IT TOOK ME EONS TO ANSWER YOUR ASK I FEEL SO BAD (╥﹏╥)

AHFUSFHUDIUSHDDSHU no joke the scene in uu4 where he was helping us get dressed & telling him all the reasons why he wants us was my FAVVVV to write between uu AND badlands. like i literally could not write it in one sitting cuz i was yearning so hard for him LOLLLL i kept having to stop and sigh and pout because what have i done in life to not deserve dazai osamu </333 truly unfair

no because fyodor is truly a pain in the ass in the waterloo universe this man has it OUT for dazai and reader in EVERY universe like why r u so bitter my man do u truly hate love so much </3333 JKKKK LOLLLL but honestly no man haunts beastzai more than fyodor LOLL like yes fyodor is not the ONLY cause of our death but like 80% of the time it's him, the other 20% being christie

the angst is coming i promise ;) HAHHAHHH no but for real it is. HAHHA i'm rlly excited for uu6 but it's going to be a tough one to write, i'm hoping to have it done within two weeks now that finals are over but it depends on how easily the scenes come to me because there's gonna be at LEAST three really tough scenes to put into words and im already getting a bit antsy over them and im not even at them yet </3

NO STOP THIS IS THE BIGGEST COMPLIMENT EVER ACTUALLY IM WEEPING honestly i've always wanted to write something of my own but i never have the time for it </3 plus i always get in my head about it too LOLLL but lar i adore u thank you for making my day im sorry this took me forever to reply to

[the-darkness-does-not-bargain]

Prompt: Shannon & Lilith -> protection

I think you kicked a hornet's nest, bestie 👀.

This takes place sometime after Shannon gets the Halo but before she learns about the conspiracy. Enjoy the angst ❤

//////

“What the fucking shit were you thinking?!”  Mary’s face is in front of yours, twisted in an angry snarl.  Her furious question echoes off the warehouse walls, but its effect rolls off of you as easily as the beads of sweat pouring down your face.

“Language, Mary.”  Your eyes dart over to Beatrice, whose voice just barely shakes as she holds an abdominal pad over your gushing stomach wound, keeping pressure on it as best she can.  She doesn’t look up at you.  Like always, she focuses all of her attention on the task at hand, which in this case is keeping you alive.  You feel a blazing surge of emotion for her in this moment, a kind of affection that is hard to distinguish from pain.

“Language, my goddamn ass,” Mary retorts loudly.  “This idiot tries to get herself killed and you’re scolding me over saying fuck?”

“I’m saying that it’s not helping the situation—”

“Enough, both of you!”  For all that she doesn’t shout, it is a steely command, one that makes you all look up in unison.  

Shannon stands some ten feet away, her braid untidy, her face dirty, and her armor speckled with blood.  The Divinium sword rests loosely in her right hand, its azure glow casting her face in a strange, holy light.  She is radiant like this, as close to an Angel of God as any human could hope to be.

She’s also upset with you.  You can see in the hard set of her shoulders, her rigid posture.  Shannon isn’t a rigid person.  She’s dutiful, and steadfast, but she’s also the person who once stole a single shoe from every sister in the convent, just for the sight of them walking funny as they try to search for them.  

Seeing her like this now, you know you’ve really messed up.

She marches toward the three of you, urges Mary aside with a soothing hand, and kneels next to you opposite Beatrice.  She looks you over, her gaze gentle but probing.  “Lilith.”  You flinch.  You can’t help it.  She and Mother Superion have a way of saying your name that instantly harpoons any toughness or bravado you mustered to face them.  They were masters of stripping down your defenses, leaving you bare for whatever purpose they intended, be it comfort or punishment.

Your mind is too hazy from blood loss to tell which course of action is on Shannon’s mind.  You know what you hope she will choose, if only because it will be easier for you to deal with later.  Shannon must sense something of that too, because she sighs heavily, sets the sword down on the concrete floor, and gently pulls Beatrice’s hands away from your wound to replace them with her own.

“Bea, go with Mary and sweep the building.  Make sure we didn’t miss any possessed, and check on the status of our extraction.”  Beatrice looks shocked, her mouth pressing into a thin line, and she seems like she desperately wants to protest, but Shannon quells her with a look.  She also waits until the two of them are out of sight before finally laying into you.

“Why did you jump in front of me, Lilith?”  She asks, slowly and clearly.

You huff, and wince when the action pulls at your weeping wound.  “I think the answer should be obvious.”

“Let’s pretend it isn’t.  Humor me,” Shannon responds.

You roll your eyes as best you can.  “He had the Divinium knife, Shannon.  He could’ve killed you.  He was going to kill you.”

“He was going to try,” she concedes, her lips twitching upward in a play at cockiness.  “Getting stabbed with Divinium wouldn’t be enough to down me, Lil.  You know that.  As soon as the piece got pulled out, I would have healed.”

You do know that, but that’s beside the point, and you tell her so.  She shakes her head, looking at you with fondness.  Who else has ever looked at you like that?  Who else could you ever say was fond of you?

“Lilith, why did you jump in front of me?”  She repeats, insistent.  You look away, unable to bear the sincere concern in her eyes.

“You’re our leader,” you say, and if you had enough blood in your body, you would flush at how embarrassing you sound.  Your mother had always scolded you about mumbling, demanding that you speak loudly and clearly at all times, but you had been a furtive child, and mumbling was a habit you never quite shook.  “The Warrior Nun.  It’s my duty to protect you.”

“Okay,” Shannon says, considering this.  “But that doesn’t really answer my question.  Even if he had gotten a hit on me, I would have been fine.”

“You don’t know that!” You whimper pathetically when your attempt at back-talk sends searing pain shooting down every nerve in your body.  You shut your eyes tight against the sting of tears, only opening them when you feel careful fingers pushing back your damp hair.  “You don’t know that, Shannon,” you repeat, pleading with her.  “Anything could happen.  Anything does happen.  Our history is littered with Warrior Nuns who fell in battles that should have been easy!  You can’t… You can’t just assume that nothing will ever happen to you, Shannon, you can’t…”

“Alright,” she murmurs calmingly, petting your hair with slow, tender strokes.  “You’re right, Lil.  I can’t assume anything.  Maybe he would have gotten lucky and landed a fatal blow on me.  Maybe I would’ve died.  I’m not thrilled by the idea, but I’ll admit to it.”  She pauses momentarily to check if your bleeding is slowing down, and then she continues.  “But even if that did happen, Lil, I wouldn’t have been scared.  I wouldn’t have worried, because I know you’d be there to accept the Halo in my place, that you’d be ready for it.”

You shake your head wildly.  “But I’m not ready!  I’m not…” God forgive you, but you can’t stop the tears anymore.  They leak down your face freely, baring your weakness to the world.  “Just because I’m the next in line doesn’t mean I want you to die, Shannon!”

“I know that,” Shannon soothes, cupping your cheek to brush the sweat and tear tracks away.  How she can be so kind to you right now is a mystery you’ll never solve, but you shamelessly grab at her hand to keep it in place.  You’ll ask God for forgiveness in your next confession.  Right now, you’ve reached your limit, and you have no resolve left to muster.

“I don’t want you to die,” you repeat, the words coming out as a sob.  “Shannon, I don’t…”

“Oh, Lil…”  She wraps her around your shoulder and carefully pulls you against her, maneuvering her body to cradle you against her side.  “I know that,” she says, pressing your head down onto her shoulder.  “I know that.”  She keeps you there for an unknown amount of time, letting you weep like a child against her.  She says nothing.  She merely hums and shushes you tenderly as you break down, waiting with the patience of a saint until you have enough wherewithal to get ahold of yourself again.

“The others,” you say, tremulously.  “They think I’m a vulture.  That I’m just waiting around for the moment I can take the Halo from you.”

“They don’t know you like I do, Lilith,” she responds easily.

You shake your head again, because she isn’t getting it.  “You don’t understand.  I… I do want the Halo,” you admit, casting your gaze away.  “It’s everything I’ve been training for, everything I’ve ever wanted.”

“I know that, too.”

“I want it,” you repeat.  “But I don’t want to take it from you, Shannon.  I don’t want you gone…”

“I’m not gone, Lil.  I’m not going anywhere anytime soon,” she insists.  She sounds so sure, so confident, as if everything you’ve just said has gone completely over her head.  It makes you want to weep again.  “But I don’t want you to go anywhere either,” she continues.  “I don’t want you to die, even if it’s to protect me.  I might die one day, on some future mission, in a way none of us can see coming, but that’s okay.  I promise, Lil, it’s okay.  That’s the Warrior Nun’s job.  And if I do, I know you’ll be ready to take my place.  And I’ll be watching over you from Heaven with every sister who came before us.  I promise, Lily, it’s going to be okay.”

You want to tell her no, to rage and scream at her, but you don’t have the strength to anymore.  What’s more, Beatrice’s voice sounds through your walkie talkie at that moment.  “The building is secured, Shannon.  Extraction has arrived.  Status?”

Shannon fishes out hers out and speaks into it while keeping a steady eye on you.  “Ready for extraction.  Tell the team to get the stitch kit ready and call Cat’s Cradle to arrange a blood transfusion.”

“Copy.”

“Can you stand?”  She asks you.  You nod, and she helps you clamber painfully to your feet.  She has to leave the sword behind for the extraction team, and it takes her enhanced strength to keep you upright, but she guides you successfully out of the building and into the van that will take you home.  

The rest of your team is already there, waiting anxiously for you.  Beatrice takes over for Shannon as they get you settled on one of the seats.  With the stitch kit already open, she starts cleaning your wound with efficient strokes, hiding the trembling in her hands by working as quickly as possible.  Mary watches from the opposite seat.  She’s still angry with you, but her concern has won out, and she keeps one eye trained on you even as she fills Shannon in on their sweep of the building.

The ride back is quiet.  Not peaceful, just quiet.  You’re exhausted, so much so that you barely wince as Beatrice stitches you up.  Shannon watches you the entire ride back, and insists on being the one to carry you in when you finally arrive back at Cat’s Cradle.  She takes you straight to the infirmary for a hastily-prepared transfusion, and doesn’t leave your side until Mother Superion calls her away for a mission debrief.

“It’s going to be okay, Lilith,” she tells you again, brushing a hand over your arm.  “I’ll be back as soon as I’m done.  I’m not going anywhere.”

She leaves, and the medics descend on you in a swarm.  You let them, only because you’re too tired to cause a fuss.  As they put an IV in your arm and hook you up to the transfusion, you close your eyes and try to shut everything out.  You want to shut your mind off too, but it continues to spin itself in circles, repeating all the things Shannon told you over and over again like a mantra you were being forced to repeat.  Mantras are supposed to be comforting.  They are supposed to help focus one’s thoughts.  

And maybe this one would comfort you, if you believed anything she said.

[roxyjean82btsoneshots]

Legs For Days

Legs For Days

✏️Jimin x female reader ✏️Friends to Lover AU 🛑 Rated 18+ 📖WC: 4102 ⚠️Warning: talks about insecurity of being tall, mentions bullying, cursing, heavy make out session turning into dry humping⚠️

Summary: Y/N is insecure about being tall. Jimin doesn't mind the height difference, he just wants to be by your side.

Also on:

Ao3

Wattpad

My Masterlist

Authors note: This story is a little more personal than I usually write and I’m aware that some might relate. But I hope you enjoy.

A big thank you to @downbad4yoongi and @star-my for being my beta angels. 💜

To say the two of you were being loud was an understatement. Yours and Jimin’s usual unserious bickering always got louder the drunker you got. Thankfully, the group was in a private room this time, or else the whole restaurant would look at you the same way your waitress did every time she came into the room. Your friends either watched the both of you with the same look of amusement as they always did, or they did their best to ignore you.

Tonight's topic of discussion was whether or not Jimin should be your date to your company party in two days since the person you were originally supposed to go with backed out.

“Jimin, if I take you, then my whole work life will be just people asking me how I know The Park Jimin! I like my quiet work life. I don’t want people knowing I’m friends with one of the world's most famous models!”

Jimin put his hand over his heart, scrunched up his face like he was in pain, and sucked in a sharp breath. “Are you ashamed of me, Y/N? Have the past ten years of our friendship meant nothing?” 

You leaned your head back and groaned in frustration before taking another shot of soju. This argument had been going in circles for almost thirty minutes now. “Jimin,” you took a deep breath before turning to face him, “I love you. You know that, right?” You bit the inside of your lip to stop the smile that wanted to show when he sniffled and wiped a nonexistent tear. “I’m not ashamed of you. You are one of my best friends, and I would do anything for you, but you know how I prefer to fly under the radar. If I show up with you, people won’t leave me alone. All I’d hear about is the handsome friend I have.”

“You think I’m handsome?” Jimin’s fake hurt turned into a victory grin.

“You’re such a pain in my ass!” You laughed, unable to control it anymore.

“$100 dollars, Taehyung.” Jimin reached across the table to collect his winnings.

“You bet against me, Tae?” Your eyebrow shot up as you ran your tongue across the inside of your cheek. “I guess you’ll be paying for your own dinner.”

Taehyung stopped mid-transaction. “Wait! What? No! Come one, Y/N! That’s not fair! It’s not my fault you fell into his trap again!”

Jimin snatched the money from his fingers. “He has a point, Y/N. It’s not his fault you lost.”

Your head snapped to Jimin, who had a cheeky grin on his face while he got his wallet out and put away his prize. “I should really kick your ass one of these days.”

He turned in your direction, rested one arm on the table, and looked you over. “Sounds like a fun time to me.”

You laughed while the temperature of your body soared, “Get away from me,” you stated, playfully shoving him away and grabbing your chopsticks.

“How have you two not fucked yet?” Jungkook piped in from across the table.

The piece of meat you’d been chewing on quickly found its way to your throat, causing you to choke.

“Damn, Jungkook.” Jimin chuckled, patting you on the back while Hoseok got you a glass of water and tried to calm his laughter so that he wouldn’t spill it. “You can’t just say shit like that out of nowhere.”

“We’ve all been wondering.” Jungkook pouted and shrugged his shoulders. “The two of you have so much sexual and non-sexual chemistry between you, it's only a matter of time before something happens.” He took in a sharp breath and turned his head slightly, taking both of your reactions in. “Unless it's already happened…”

You put up your finger stopping him, “Him and I,” you wiggled your finger pointing at you and Jimin. “Never have. Never will.”

“I wouldn’t say never, Y/N. One of these days you might.”

“I’m up for it if you are.” Jimin smiled and ran his tongue across his bottom lip out of the corner of your eyes.

“He’s not my type, Jungkook.”

“You don’t have a type, Y/N,” Yoongi yelled from the other end of the table. “You’ve always said you would give anyone a chance as long as they aren't assholes. And Jimin, although he’s a pain in the ass, he’s not an asshole.”

Jimin’s lips tightened and he nodded. “I am not an asshole.”

You sighed, annoyed at the conversation. “That is true, but I would also prefer someone taller or as tall as me.”

“I’m a whole two inches shorter! And that’s if we are both barefooted!” Jimin stated, before quickly realizing it wasn’t helping his case any.

The conversation was beginning to upset you. You’d always been self-conscious about your height, thanks to being teased about it growing up and the numerous times you were turned down by a guy. Did you find Jimin attractive? Yes, extremely attractive. But you promised yourself many years ago that you wouldn’t put yourself through the pain of rejection again, so that’s why you placed him in the friend zone the moment you met him.

“Two inches isn’t that bad, Y/N.”

You took a shot of soju and poured another while the table agreed with Yoongi. “Although he has legs for days, Jimin is still too short for me and that's that.” You quickly tilted your head back, taking the last shot, and slammed the glass on the table. “I’m going first. I have a lot of things to do tomorrow.” You stood up and collected your stuff. “Dinner is on me!” You waved your hand over your shoulder before shutting the door and going to the counter to pay.

The second you stepped outside, you rolled your neck and shoulders to help ease the tension that had started to build. You flagged down the first available taxi that you saw and got in. But as you were closing the door and giving him your destination, the door was stopped.

“What are you doing?” You asked Jimin, who had a hand on the top of it.

He didn’t say anything, just waved you over so that he could get in. The driver gave you a concerned look in the mirror, and you let him know it was fine. This wasn’t the first time one of the guys had ridden home with you, especially after a night of drinking.

The ride was silent except for the music coming from the radio. You stared out the window, listening to the sad love song that was playing. It was definitely not the kind of music you needed right now.

“Say something, Y/N.” Jimin finally spoke up after twenty minutes of silence.

You took your heavy head off the window and spoke to him, “Stop flirting with me.”

“Wh..what?” He chuckled.

Your head leaned back against the window, and your focus went back to the world outside. “I said stop flirting with me. It hurts too much when you do.” You chewed on the inside of your cheek to keep your tears at bay that threatened to spill out.

Silence fell over the car again, breaking only when you told the driver thank you. Jimin followed quietly behind you. He didn’t say anything as the two of you rode the elevator up to your apartment and entered. You didn’t have the energy to talk; all you wanted to do was get cleaned up and go to bed.

After you’d finished up and climbed under the covers, Jimin came into your room. He had done the same, changing into one of the spare sets of clothes the guys had kept in your extra room. He was the only one out of the group that slept in the king-size bed with you. Jimin had taken care of you one day while you were sick and accidentally fell asleep. When he woke up, he complained about how your bed was more comfortable than the one in the guest room and claimed the empty side as his.

You turned so that your back was facing him. You inwardly cursed yourself and let a silent tear fall when your body relaxed to his closeness and smell.

Jimin sighed and turned off the lamp on his side of the bed, “Goodnight, Y/N.”

・❥・

You’d just finished putting on your makeup when your phone pinged with a notification. It was a text message from Jimin telling you that he was on his way up to your apartment. You sighed and put down your makeup brush. You were way too busy right now for interruption. The buzzer to the door went off, and you double-checked your robe to make sure it was secure before you opened it. On the other side of the door stood a smiling Jimin, who was wearing a black tailored suit and had a bouquet of flowers in one hand.

Your eyes raked over him, taking in his perfectly styled hair to the tip of his Chelsea boots. “What are you all dressed up for?” you asked, folding your arms.

“I’m your date!” He proudly exclaimed, puffing out his chest.

“I never agreed to that,” you rolled your eyes and walked away.

“Careful, Y/N. You’ll scuff my shoes!”

You looked behind you and saw Jimin’s foot wedged between the door and the frame, stopping it from closing. “Well, that’s what you get for using your damn foot to stop the door.”

“Man, you’re in a mood today.”

You stopped at the couch and grabbed the garment bag resting on the arm that held your dress. “I don’t have time for this, Jimin. I still need to get dressed.” You jumped when the bouquet was suddenly put in front of your face.

“It’s a present from the guys. All six of them picked out a flower to say sorry about the dinner the other night.”

“What about you?” you lifted an eyebrow and took the bouquet.

“There’s no better present than me!” He sat down on the couch and stretched out his arms across the back. “I am all yours tonight. I promise to be a gentleman and stay by your side like a good date.”

Jimin pouted when you didn’t argue. His eyes stayed on you and watched you walk away. When you emerged from your room twenty minutes later, his heart stopped, and his breath hitched. You looked beautiful. He had never seen you dressed up like this before. The black dress was tight, putting all your curves on display, while the high neckline perfectly showed off your clavicle. The long sleeves helped to keep you covered until the dress ended mid-thigh, showing off your well-toned legs. He’d be lying if he said he hadn’t ever thought about them in ways that would make you blush. You had joked a few times, saying that he had legs for days, but yours really did go on for days. When you stopped to use the mirror in the corner of the living room so that you could put your earrings in, Jimin nearly slid off the couch. The dress was backless, stopping just above your bottom.

“Jimin?”

“I’m sorry. Did you need something?” He asked, snapping out of his thoughts.

“I asked if you could help me with my necklace.”

“Yeah, sure.” Jimin got off the couch and walked over to you. The heels you had on only added an inch or two to your height. You weren’t a fan of wearing heels that made you too much taller than normal. He knew it was because you didn’t want to stick out more than you already did. Your height was one of your biggest insecurities; you liked to pretend that it wasn’t, but he knew.

You turned to face him after he’d finished. “Do I look that bad?”

“What? No!” Jimin blinked rapidly and shook his head. “You look amazing! I’ve just never seen you in something like this before. It’s taking me a bit to get used to it.”

You ran your hands over your dress and pulled the skirt down some more. “I wanted to try something new. But I feel almost naked. I should go put something else on. I’m not mentally prepared for the attention this dress might come with.”

“No, you don’t!” Jimin grabbed your arm, stopping you from leaving to go change. “We don’t have time for that!” He kept a hold of your arm while he walked to the closet by the front door. “We just need to find…” He trailed off while he sorted through the coats. “Ah! Here we go! I knew I’d left it here.” He pulled out and shook out a black trench coat. “It’s unisex, so it will work perfectly.”

“Are you sure? Isn’t this the jacket you got from a photoshoot? It’s pretty expensive.”

Jimin hummed and helped you put it on, “I’m sure. It will keep you warm, and it will keep random men from staring at you while we go outside to the car.”

・❥・

The two of you were currently sitting in the back of the car, laughing and chatting about the happenings of your company party while Jimin’s personal driver drove. Jimin did just as he said he would and stayed by your side for the most part.

“I gave SunHee your phone number, by the way.” You laughed when his face scrunched up in disgust when you mentioned your boss's secretary's name. The woman had practically bulldozed everyone down when she saw you and Jimin walk through the door. Sunhee was one of the least liked people in the office; she was the head secretary, and she let everyone know it.

Jimin’s body shook as he remembered the way she kept putting her hands on him while she flirted. “God, I hope you’re joking. I can’t deal with any more crazy stalkers in my life.”

“I’m only joking. I couldn’t do that to you or me. I mean, if you two started dating, that means I’d have to see her outside of work.” This time, it was your face that scrunched up in disgust.

“That’s good because I told her we were dating.”

“You didn’t,” your laughter stopped when you saw the serious look on his face. “You didn’t, Jimin…Jimin. Please tell me you are joking.”

“What was I supposed to do? She kept trying to get me to leave with her. At one point, she even tried to get me into the supply closet!”

You groaned in frustration and let your head fall to the window. “Monday is going to be hell.”

Jimin patted you on the shoulder, “That’s what you get for leaving us alone at the table.”

“I had to pee,” you groaned. “Why did they have to pick a place that was so far away?” You weren’t looking for an answer, but he replied anyway.

“We still have about forty minutes until we get to your apartment. My place is closer if you want to just stay there.”

You turned your head and glared at him. “What makes you think that this date went well enough for me to go home with you?”

Jimin copied your earlier move and looked out the window. “I just thought you’d want to get out of those shoes and into some comfortable clothing as soon as possible. Plus, I live close to your favorite fried chicken restaurant.”

Your lips and eyebrows tightened while you thought. Once you’d come to a decision, you nodded and got the driver's attention. “To Jimin’s house, please. Also, can we stop to get chicken, please?”

・❥・

Jimin laughed while he poured each of you a glass of beer. You looked so cute sitting there in his shirt and a pair of his boxers, wiggling as you chewed on your food across the coffee table from him.

“I think that’s your twelfth piece.” He joked.

“I think you should shut up.” You replied in a singsongy voice.

Jimin sat back and watched you as he drank. His mind was swirling with questions that he needed answers to. “Tonight went pretty well, didn’t it?”

“Except for the random fan girls, yes. I’d say it did.” You wiped your hands on the napkin and took a drink.

“Is two inches really that big of a deal?”

You were mid-drink when your confused eyes looked at him. “I guess that depends on the location of the two inches you’re lacking in.” You smirked.

“I am not lacking there, you perv,” he laughed.

You shrugged your shoulders. “If you say so.”

“I was talking about my height, Y/N.”

“To some women, it might not,” you shrugged

“I’m not talking about some women. I’m talking about you.”

You were hunched over with your mouth hung open pre-bite. Your eyes looked up at him. He was being serious. Now the question was, did you want to have this conversation with him? Did you have enough liquid courage to let everything out in the open?

Jimin sat there on his side of the table, watching you. The expression on his face told you that he wasn’t going to give up until you answered him.

You straightened up and downed your half-full glass of beer. “Alright, let's have this conversation,” you sighed. “To me, it is. I don’t want it to be, but it is. I can’t tell you how many times I have been turned down because of my height or been broken up with because the guy I was dating couldn’t handle the rude comments. Not to mention all the names I was called. So yes, for me, two inches does matter.”

“It doesn’t to me.”

“Jimin…” Your words trailed off when he moved the table to the side so that he could scoot closer to you.

“Y/N, I understand that you are worried about our height difference. I would be lying if I said I hadn’t thought about it. But I realize I don’t care. People are going to make comments because they are assholes. All that matters to me is that I have you by my side.”  You looked down at your hand, suddenly fascinated by your nails, while he continued. “So wear your heels, take pride in your height, and be my girlfriend.”

You sat there for a few minutes, just taking in the words that he said. Two inches didn’t look like that big of a deal to most people, but to you, it was. Could you do the same as him and push your insecurities aside one last time?

“Oh my god. Did I read things wrong? Are you not attracted to me? Did I just make a total fool of myself?”

Your head quickly snapped up. “No, it’s not that!”

“So you do think I’m attractive?”

“Yes, very. I just…I umm. Fuck. Okay.” The words came out even though you hadn’t intended them to.

“Okay?” The excitement he was feeling became visible on his face.

“We can give it a try.”

He leaped up from his seated position and hugged you. “You know what’s nice about us sitting down?”

“What?” 

Jimin pulled back a little, “Neither of us has to adjust our heights to kiss.”

Before you could say anything, Jimin put his lips on yours. Your body instantly melted, and your eyes fluttered close.

For a moment, you felt as if you were floating before you felt the floor against your back. After that, it didn't take much longer for the simple kiss to turn into a full-blown make-out session. The two of you in your own little world, taking each other in with your lips and hands.

Jimin’s apartment filled with the sound of your combined moans when you wrapped your legs around him, effectively trapping him against you. The hunger you’d both had trapped inside of you for years was threatening to take over with the movement of his hips and the touch of your skin on his.

The sound of Jimin’s phone going off snapped both of you out of your lust-filled haze. Jimin slowly lifted himself away from you. “I didn't mean for it to go that far.” He said, just as out of breath as you were. “I was just hoping for a little kiss. Not a…”

“Full-blown dry hump session?” you laughed.

“Yeah, that. Although I’m not complaining, I think we should stop for now.” He turned and glared at his phone when it went off again. Jimin pouted and looked back at you. “I hate to say this, but I’m going to need you to unwrap me from your beautiful legs so that I can yell at whoever is blowing up my phone.”

Before you could reply, both of your heads snapped in the direction of the front door when you heard the sound of his passcode being entered. “Fuck!” the two of you said in unison.

Jimin had just gotten himself straightened out, and you had just gotten yourself into the bathroom when the entryway was filled with the sound of your friends.

“See, I told you they’d be here!” Seokjin’s voice echoed. “Jimin! Where are you? Oh, you’re right there.” He laughed when he found Jimin standing in the front room with a confused look on his face.

“Where’s, Y/N?” Namjoon asked, walking around the older man with bags full of food.

“I was in the bathroom.” Before you knew it, Taehyung and Jungkook were standing next to you with their eyes squinted.

“Something’s different…” the youngest of the two spoke as they began to circle you.

“What the hell are you guys doing?” you nervously laughed.

“Something feels off. Don’t you think, Jungkook?”

“There’s definitely something.”

“Oh will you two cut it out!” Yoongi yelled while he and the other men watched the weirdness going on a few feet away. “We came here to eat, drink, and let them tell us about the party.”

“Is that a hickey?!”

Everyone else in the room froze except for you, who quickly covered your neck with your hands and looked at Jimin.

“What did you do?” Taehyung looked at Jimin, whose face was turning red. “Jimin? Why does Y/N have a hickey on her lower neck?”

Jimin’s mouth opened and shut a few times while he tried to figure out how to respond. “What makes you think I did something?” he asked defensively. “Who's to say she didn’t do it?”

“What the hell, Jimin? I didn’t give myself a hickey!”

“Well, I didn’t give it to you! My phone interrupted us before I…” Jimin stopped talking and glared at the younger two who were smiling from ear to ear.

“There’s no hickey, Y/N.” Jungkook put an arm around your shoulder. “But Jimin’s dress shirt is crooked.”

You elbowed him in the side and slapped Taehyung on the arm. “Assholes! The both of you are assholes.” You slid out from under Jungkook’s arm and went to the kitchen where Namjoon and Hoseok were standing, trying their best not to laugh.

“Welp,” Yoongi clapped loudly, breaking up the staring contest between the three youngest. “Guess that means we are going to eat, drink, and talk about the party along with whatever the hell we interrupted.”

You groaned and let your torso fall to the island to hide your embarrassed face. This was not at all how you saw your night going. “Get off the island, Y/N,” Jimin said, pulling you up and into his chest. “I take full responsibility and won't let them interrogate you too much.”

Your eyes snapped back to Taehyung and Jungkook when you heard ‘aws’ coming from them. “I really don’t like you two right now! I knew I should’ve slammed the door on your damn foot.” You couldn’t help but laugh when Jimin started laughing behind you.

“Does that mean I’m finally going to get that ass-kicking you promised?”

“Get away from me.” You laughed harder and gently pushed Jimin away.

“So you and the pain in the ass, huh?” Yoongi asked when you joined him and Seokjin at the table.

“Yep, me and the pain in the ass.”

Jimin was different from the other guys you’d had a crush on. Looking back, you could see that now. He nor either one of your friends had made you feel like a freak for your height. And he was right. Those who did have a problem with it were assholes. The thought of being with Jimin made you feel anxious, but strangely, in a good way.

THE END

[bronx-bomber87]

Lets keep this thing rolling and onto:

1x04 ‘the switch’

This ep is SEVERELY lacking in gifs so this will be sparse. Especially since there wasn't any Chenford not a ton of gifs available LOL Also its lacking in Chenford content so this will not be as robust as previous reviews but tis part of the season. So lets get started.

The engagement beginning is sweet but hilarious. 'In 2-5 years- haha When Talia takes the ring cracks me up. Funny thought its been 5 years they’re probably married now that I think about it LMAO

So watching Nolan/Lucy scenes like watching paint dry. It pains me to watch it.

What does give me joy is every time Nolan brings up commitment how uncomfortable it makes her. It's a good view into her as character. As we see later in the ep where she reveals she's never been serious about anything till being a Cop and Nolan.

It is fun to watch the TO swap. Tim saying he’s going to break Jackson’s spirit made me laugh. Not cause I wanted him to break Jackson. Because honestly I think without Angela as his T.O. Jackson would’ve broken under Tim’s tutelage. Where as Lucy thrives off it and it makes her a better cop. This is a great representation of each rookie being with the right T.O.

I do hate how all over Lucy Talia is. She knows dating Nolan is a no no. But damn it’s not who she is as a person. Or as a cop. Shouldn’t be the only thing that defines her. Wracking her with guilty and such. I loved her reply to Talia though . ‘There are no other rookies like me’ damn right my girl. Tim sees that and knows what he has in her. She’s not wrong she needs to not date him but hot damn back off a bit. Their scenes were too muddled with that. I know it was a set up to the ending scene for her and John but didn't need to dominate their entire time together IMO.

She understands his tactics and honestly it’s why they work so well. Yeah he’s rough af but it’s always with a purpose. I love that she already knows this about him early on. Once again proving the original pairings for T.O’.s were the right choice. She’s so right he totally takes it as a challenge for him to fix Jackson. One of the many reasons their work relationship is so damn solid. There's an understanding there and its why their work flow is so cohesive.

I do love Tim’s eventual approach to fixing Jackson. Shows his softer side not only as a cop but a T.O. lovely to watch. His whole thing with Wallace just gives us another layer of depth. Another piece of my fav puzzle that is Tim Bradford ❤️ I love this man. Truly.

We get to the end of the ep. The scene where they finally break it off, sucks to watch for Lucy. Never fun to watch Lucy get hurt. That’s my girl. The way Nolan breaks it off with her sucks. Like she said she struggled for weeks and he just ripped off the bandaid. I’m happy it’s over my least fav part of a rewatch. Always so awkward to watch them.

I do love her empowered comeback telling him she joined on a whim but didn’t realize how much she would love it. She was going to take Talia's advice, give this everything she has. The very start of bad ass Lucy Chen has begun. Don’t need no damn Nolan LOL

Not a morsel of Chenford in this ep but it had some good stuff in it none the less. Thank you all once again for the likes/comments I’ve gotten since I started this. They make me so very happy. Please feel free to comment and or like. Hoping to have ep 5 review up later this week. till next time 😊

Gif Credit to Chenfordsource

[clutchpowers]

Sooooo... i wanted to stick this little rambly thing at the bottom of the redraw but it would have made it look UGLY so im doing this separately... just wanna talk about the whole thing and What Not.

TLDR: its been a slash positive ride thats been worth it to try "something new" every year and my favorite piece out of all of them is the 9th. also for the curious heres the comparison of the 5th anni piece to the recent one (2018 -> 2023)

anyway. personal post time.

oh where to begin *rocks on my rocking chair* i guess it would be with the 5th anniversary piece...at the time it had been a long while since i did lineless art and i thought it would be cool to try it again for that one so i did by redrawing an old piece from 2014... that was the first "finished piece" i made of Them. i think i even made it into a wallpaper for myself lmao. anyway after i posted it i was like "aw man i should draw something every year until the 10th" but i thought yeah right. im going to forget next year like the idiot i am. but i Some How managed to do one every year... th worms got me... i honestly didnt think id make it all the way to the 10th but i did!! AND WITHOUT MISSING A DAY EXCEPT FOR THE 7TH WHERE I WAS A WEEK LATE???? UNREAL especially when fun fact! every year i had no idea what i wanted to do! all i knew for sure is that i wanted each piece to be out of my comfot zone to push me to do something a little different. unfortunately the subjects tm where always the same so it feels a little. samey. but these are my celebratory posts I GET TO ONLY POST ABOUT THE OTP SUPER BLORBOS OF ALL TIME

the 6th anniversary was a redraw of that one scene. you know the one. the helicopter one. fucking hate that scene btw it actually causes me psychic damage i cant watch with the audio or ill scream. but it is my favorite scene of mine despite all the horrors it causes <3 and i wanted to redraw it as if it was a cartoon... like i had taken screencaps from the lcu cartoon in my head. i still remember the backgrounds being such a pain in the ass. honestly id like to go back and redo this one one day too or do something similar to the concept because its a fun one that i always saw done growing up and i wanted to try it myself.

for the 7th anniversary you can see the turn.. no more humans... return to lego... i was getting a little more confident in drawing them in the lego form so i did another redraw this time with the ending!! honestly i still like this one and how it looks even with how late it was but i wanted to test my confidence and do a real True and Finished piece with COLORED LINES and EVERYTHING!!!!! im glad i ended up taking the turn because for the LONGEST TIME i wanted to try and draw them as lego so bad because all i did was draw them as humans and its funny because now its the exact opposite. glad this piece was kinda the solidification in my head that yeah okay im a bit better at drawing the stylized lego toy now i can keep drawing them like this without feeling like im going to want to delete this in 2 weeks.

the 8th anniversary one is so weird. somewhere toward the beginning of the year it got into my head that i wanted to do a comic of them but time/school would have gotten in the way so i ended up opting for a page. another redraw of the ending scene which honestly out of all of them this is my least favorite one and its solely because its all so off. i def could have formated it better so the background shot doesnt take up the entire fucking page but then again im not a comic guy and this was my first time so the layout was bound to look HORRID but this is something id like to come back to ive had the idea of making like a genuine short comic about them since FOREVER and now that im a bit more experienced (lying) i would like to make one day!!!! just gotta stop getting caught up in my scripts!! and going in circles!! Because im obviously not a writer and i keep getting first-hand embarrassment from these!! but ill get over it one day lol.

OH THE 9TH ANNIVERSARY PIECE MY BELOVED. ONE OF MY FAVORITE PIECES ACTUALLY i love this stupid thing so much you have no idea.i know its re-using lineless but i just loved the idea of what it would look like lineless AND IT CAME OUT SO PERFECT I LOVE IT SO MUCH obv it needs a few touch-ups so the main issues dont stand out to me but god. i love this piece so much. idk what came out of me to make this but its so good ill never get over it. and the little lego them as a cake topper ITS JUST SO CUTE I DONT HAVE MUCH TO SAY OTHER THAN I LOVE THIS SO MUCH SORRY

finally. the 10th anniversary piece. oh my god. okay. i need everyone to understand this. i had woken up with this fucking Unbearable pounding headache that was trying to kill me. my body the entire day wanted me to stop and lie down, but last night i was already done with a good chunk of it and all i had to do that day was finish some lines and the coloring?? i literally don't remember all i remember is my body actively trying to shut down and force me to stop and sleep which i took a nap? didnt help. so i said fuck it im finishing this. i was. an entire goddamn corpse arched over my laptop. i was so delirious the entire time its a fucking miracle it even came out as good as it did but honestly. i still hate how it fucking looks. like you can TELL when i gave up (the shading) and it sticks out like a sore fucking thumb to me and it pisses me off because i knew i could have done so much better if i wasnt being stricken down by gods hand and his every attempt to get me to rest. idk like im generally proud ot it, with this one i wanted to go out with a bang tm so i tried to draw every important and relevant character instead of ALL of them like I was originally planning LMAO but ah well. maybe one day when im faster at drawing. this one i defiantly wanna go back and touch up but i everytime i open the file i can see 40 more things wrong with it and it drives me nuts. so ill just have to wait for when im ready. i guess.

can i just say though. the improvement is crazy. it always catches me off guard because tbh i uh. dont like my own art. im getting better at not fucking hating it because i can pinpoint everything wrong with it but whenever i see the side by sides it always surprises me. i always dont think im improving but then i see it and its like wow i really am getting better! i still suck at 3000 things but im getting better! and its overall just a nice thing to see after having drawn them for as long as i have... the power of the worms is strong and has ruined my brain...... speaking of i know ive said a few times that i fucking hate certain pieces, not just LCU related ones but almost anything i post, but if you love them and are able to look at them with a twinkle in your eye then thank you. genuinely. i honestly love looking over the tags of people exploding and saying nice things. it warms my cold little heart and im glad there are people out there that genuinely love some of the things what i do! even if its just fanart and its just their blorbo. thank you for sticking around even tho all i do is draw my otp super blorbos :'^) this game means the world to me and im glad like more than 2 people wanna spread it around.

to wrap back around to the anniversary stuff and speaking of big love to the people out there THE FREAKING EPIC ZINE i was just a small thing but it came out amazing even for how small it was thank you to the contributors and thank you to everyone whos downloaded it!! its still getting the occasional and i love getting the notif in my email about it. i love that there are still people out there who wanna see it and all the hard work everyone put into it to celebrate the games 10th just thank you again i really does mean alot to me ALSO IF YOU HAVENT CHECKED IT OUT PLEASE DO IT IS 100% WORK YOUR TIME AND ITS DIGITAL WITH PRINT AT HOME STICKERS AND YOU CAN KEEP IT AND LOOK AT IT FOREVER

uh to end this off....would I like to do this again..... I mean I kinda am? by that i mean ill do the big numbers (15, 20, 25, 30, 40, etc) till the day i freaking die!!!! but yeah no countdown stuff ever again!!!!! sorry :^( it was super fun to do though!!!! and im glad i did it that piece is the conclusion to the whole thing but that doesnt mean ill stop drawing them. duh. theyre my characters now! but heres to many more anniversaries and to hopefully another game! or to just see them again in any other lego media! or even better... a mischaracterized cameo in ninjago!

[catscoollike]

Catti and Monster kid walk sprites ^_^ + snowy

Hey look at these!!! I decided to throw my metaphorical hat into the metaphorical ring and try to give some of these dorks walk sprites. They're kinda rough around the edges but I think they turned out pretty good for only being around an afternoon's amount of work. I gotta say though each of these feels like they have their own story of how they were all uniquely a pain in the ass to make.

SNOWY

Starting with everyone's favorite deltarune character, Snowy! Holy hell! How I hope to never make a sprite for this dork ever again! In a game full of relatively simple character designs this dude just stands out as a beacon of complexity. He's just so weird man.

Now actually I completely forgot that he already had a sprite for him facing to the left in the game. (It's only used twice in the whole game). And I really didn't expect him to be that uh, flat?

Yeah, I don't know I guess he got hit in the face with a frying pan or something.

MONSTER KID

This little charmer was easier to sprite by several orders of magnitude. One of the reasons why is that 30% of their directional movement sprites were already done. And the reason I say only 30% of its done is because the one used in game is uh...

... Just the sprite that's used when they're sitting at their desk in class. Seriously! Thats their walking sprite! When MK and Snowy run away from Susie at the bunker, they just slide out of there!

Now to be fair they're gone in like half a second so it's pretty hard to notice if you aren't looking for it and its also probably why the spriters didn't feel the need to give them walking animations yet. but whenever I see this scene used in a theory video about the bunker I always chuckle.

But still, it was very helpful to have a sort of jumping off point for making their sprites. Since I wasn't just going to reinvent the wheel and draw them a whole new face. But I did need to give them a new body though, since I doubt monster kids body is a perfect cone from every angle.

CATTI

Now the thing is that there many very talented pixel artists that work on deltarune... Toby fox is not one of them.

Now I only mention this because with the fucking 2 sprites, that catti has in the game there is a pretty clear difference in artistic ability between them.

One sprite of her in her work uniform with shading. And one sprite of her sitting at her desk that uses flat default MS paint colors. Thats all I have to work with.

So, assuming that god is good and that the sprite that doesn't look like pixel barf is the one that more accurately represents her design. I used that to reference the color of her earrings and eyes. Along with her head sprite, since again, don't need to reinvent the wheel. Especially since I don't imagine her face shape completely changing once she changes her clothes. But I did add some shading since I though it looked nice.

After I had the head done, I decided to sprite... well, the rest of her. I sorta skimped out on the front facing body. And just made it a heavily altered version of Catty's. I only did that because every other member of the family pretty much just has the same body. And since shes related to them I thought it made sense to not make her some weird outlier to the rest of her family. Contrary to what Catti may tell you in game.

Making the directional sprites felt like pulling teeth. Once I had the down sprite done the up sprite was a piece of cake but oh man. The horizontal sprites. yeah uh, that's... probably not what that sprite is going to look like in deltarune.

Her head shape was tough, I didn't know if she had a prominent snout, or if her head is just completely round like it is when looking at it from the front. But after messing around with it while listening to the entirety of RV pine's fanmade chapter 3 soundtrack. I finally got something passable.

But that's about it, I guess. I know I just got done complaining about how these were super-duper hard to make and stuff. But it was pretty fun to make these.

[late-to-the-magnus-archives]

Iteration - a Malevolent fic, epilogue

John has been poisoned. Who did it? Unknown. How can he be saved? If not for Arthur, he wouldn't.

The ripples from this event hit far distant shores, and no one will come out of it unchanged.

Part 100 of the Surrogate series.

AO3 - epilogue

--------

The poison was a mystery, and apparently, would always be. This… This would not do.

A spell to activate it was clever. The description of a sauce didn’t make sense, initially, but a magic surge to specifically catalyze the poison into its active form? Absolutely brilliant. Which made sense, given whom she thought had made it.

The Keeper had observed the tiny, frail, twitching piece of magic for hours, dissecting it thread by thread, vivisecting this unthinking, unfeeling living spell so she could see the ways each bit of magic interconnected. There, a specific intent to precipitate one ingredient into a solid from its dissolved state; there, a flash of energy directed just so to charge the particles in question, activating the magical cascade that chewed away at the injured fragments of gods and shunted them out, away, gone.

But fascinating as it was, she had pieces of a puzzle that were not complete. Dagon could not give her a name for the poison, and didn’t know how it was made. She’d paced, and brooded, and researched, and considered asking Dagon for every antidote he could cook up that might clue her in (damn the price!), but it wasn’t enough.

That’s when she heard the whistling.

Sharp, clever, perfectly on-pitch, yet absolutely chaotic in its purported melody. It was very clearly Kayne, in the Scriptorium, doing… something?

Whatever he was doing, he was bringing it her way.

And he was a mess.

Torn. Bloodied. He stopped whistling to grin at her like some rabid coyote, and then resumed, walking forward. His ichor was eating holes in the floor.

“Kayne!” She couldn’t quite keep herself from being bright and bubbly, the intrigue and the questions and the mystery and the need roiling together into a sound like teeth gnashing in delight upon seeing a meal. “Where are you going? What are you doing? Did you see what happened?”

“Heeeey, baby sis!” he said with a wave (flinging more ichor, which sizzled and spit as it ate into whatever it touched). “Got you a present! Oh wait, gotta finish my performance, ahem, ah… oooooooh!” He pressed the back of his ichor-dark hand to his forehead and threw his head back like some damsel in a movie. “Alas, I am done for!” And with all the drama of a thousand cats, he flopped onto his back on the floor.

She watched, silent and still, for a long second.

Wait. That was her cue!

“Oh no!” she cried, sweeping to his side, kneeling and pulling his limp form onto her lap. “My dearest brother, struck down but steadfast to return unto me! Pray tell, Kayne, speak softly to me; tell me your efforts were not in vain, so I may avenge thee!”

He gave her the most exaggerated wink. “No need, fair one, for I have avenged mineself!” He paused. “Myself? Mine… self? Well, either way, I actually didn’t do that, but I did getcha a present.” He held up a small, square crystal.

Inside, etched into the glass, was a recipe.

“I put on a show,” he said.

She gasped, soft, reverent, taking the crystal and rotating it in her hands to see every angle, the words trying to crawl from her sight but pinned in place. This was it. The poison. This was it! “Really? For me?”

“Well,” he said, and though he was grinning, his voice dropped into a terrible register. “I might’ve needed to remind someone not to fuck with my show, and also wanted them to think that they could fight me off.” He rolled his eyes back, and for a moment, aped dead, tongue improbably long and hanging out of his mouth. Then he grinned at her again. “I was just such a pain in the ass that he gave me the damned recipe to make me go away.” He cackled.

She grappled him within all four of her arms (and about five more for good measure), clutching him tight to her chest. “Thank you, thank you, thank you! I need to tell Dagon right away. Everything was so muted and mixed with the interference I couldn’t tell—thank you!” And then she paused, hands ruffling his mussed and bloodied hair. “Do you need to be healed? A silly question, I know, but I can at least fix up your guise for you.”

“Weeeell…” Somehow, he did puppy eyes. “I can do it myself, buuuuut….” And he arched dramatically over her skirt-covered knees. “Oh, alas, I gots a owie…”

She pulled out a black silk handkerchief and tenderly daubed at his brow, power thrumming as his guise knit back together, leaving clean streaks of unblemished skin amidst the ichor that coated him. “But… why walk away?” She asked, torn flesh knitting back together under her ministrations. “This… you caught him, fair and square. He tried to kill your stars. Why let him go? Why not really make him suffer for it?”

That smile was worse, poisonous, dark, hungry. “Because it wouldn’t be enough, doll. There is a fucking reason no one has tried to go against me in millennia, and our brother… our fool of a sibling… thinks that reason doesn’t apply to him.” He stretched. “I mean, sure, he could quit now, but we both know he won’t. And sure, I could have called him on it now, but who the fuck cares? It’s just two gods squabbling over mortal toys. Nothing interesting about it. But.” He wriggled. “Oh, oh, oh, this? This is a fuckin’ guillotine of his own making. I’m not just gonna stop him. I’m not just gonna call him out. I am gonna humiliate him, hurt him, fucking castrate him, and do it all in such a way that he won’t stick his bleeding dicks out of his lab again for a million fuckin’ years. Even letting him pick me apart tonight was all steps on that road. I want him to think he can hurt me. When that axe falls, doll… it’s gonna be memorable.” He laughed, a sanity-shredding sound to match that smile. “They might even end up writing songs about it.” He suddenly drooped again. “Woe is me! I got bited. For He Was Just Too Much.”

“Oh nooooo,” the Keeper said, keeping up with the dramatics (if only just) while her mind clicked and whirred. “I… I see. It’s not about… them. It’s about making an impression.”

It did not feel good to say. She liked them. Her hearts hurt.

But that didn’t matter; her brother’s games were his own, and she could respect the main drive behind it. She was not his keeper (hehe), and neither was he hers. And wasn’t this a better solution, anyway? In the long run, this would keep him from sniffing at her door before long.

(She was, still, deeply angry about the incident at the House of the Worm. The servants of that awful sibling had stolen things right under her nose, and destroyed knowledge in the process. But that was her axe to grind, and she would not ask Kayne to heft it for her.)

“Humans have an expression I like,” he said. “‘An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.’ Teach a lesson good enough, you’ve only got to teach it once.” He wriggled again, settling on and in her lap like a cat. “I hope you like the recipe. Wasn’t why I went, but you know. Thought of you, and I was already there.”

“Don’t read my mind,” she huffed, but there was no force behind the words, merely a childish whine. “I really needed this. Both for your purposes, and… It doesn’t get much more rare than this.” Her voice was hushed. “I’ll get your show back on the road soon. Promise.”

“Aww, you don’t gotta, but thanks. They’ll manage.” He grinned. “So you like your present? Huh? Huh? Who’s the best older brother? I am!”

“You are!” She lifted him into the air, spun him, and brought him back into a crushing hug. “I love it, Kayne, I do. You’re the best. And, well, I will shortly be paid for the antidote, once I can confirm with Dagon. This is so helpful.”

“Ha,” Kayne said at her, at everybody, at nobody, and enjoyed being fussed over until he got bored.

#

Hastur tried to be a good god. Just. Right. According to his own code, anyway. But this…

This wasn’t the right thing to do. Yet… it was the right thing to do.

It was true that Bh’tnnkr’nuah would never leave those mines. He couldn’t; if anyone saw him again, it would be saying Hastur was weak, or hadn’t meant his word, or wouldn’t pursue suffering in exchange for wicked deeds.

But some part of Hastur understood. Understood this fool who’d thrown everything away for the sake of…

Of course he knew where the mate and daughter went. They weren’t hard to find. And he didn’t have to let them know he was the one who set up communications so these three could talk, see each other’s faces every night, even if they were separated by entire worlds.

The communication crystals were from his treasury, and marked when sent as final wages, paid in full, to be followed by no more. But this family could talk. See each other.

If, in time, that mate and child wanted to… visit him in the mines, Hastur would allow it—but that was far, far in the future. For now, this gut-wrenching mercy would have to do.

He understood Bh’tnnkr’nuah’s decision, but he could never forgive it. And as for whoever had pretended to be Gokar’luh…

The death of his son was out now, no way around it. Time for that part of the plan to slot into place—the pretended dismissal, the frustration that his banished child should have been so stupid, the laughter that Gokar’luh could ever have thought he’d succeed.

Tomorrow. The lies and sharp-toothed deceit, the pretense at the asbsence of grief… tomorrow.

Tonight, he sat alone in his room, and held Gokar’luh’s crown, and wept, for he understood the assassin he could never, ever forgive.

----------------

Notes:

(Note from Trin: it's my birthday, and I am a hobbit, so... here's 21,000 words for you!)

[vossn]

4, 10, 16 and 17 please!

Thank you for the ask <3

4. What’s a word that makes you go absolutely feral?

Havoc. I like how it rolls off the tongue and I am sad it is not being used frequently anymore, since its one of those types of words (i forgot the name because it is past midnight) that only exist in combination with others e.g. to wreak havoc. I named the bar my main characters congregate in the Havoc because of that. I also thought it was fitting to name the place after widespread destruction. Unfortunately the it gets burned down, but hey.. that is expected.

10. Has a piece of writing ever “haunted” you? Has your own writing haunted you? What does that mean to you?

Being haunted by a text to me means having it be so present in your thoughts you almost grow weary of it. As a child i was frequently haunted by different pieces of writing and carried them around with me for no other reason other than I just felt I had to. My backpack always had at least one book in it. There was an article about two goats burning in a zoo fire and it made me sad for days on end, so I kept it in my little school bag. I'd say I am quite easily haunted by just about everything textual, but I do not take it physically with me anymore.

My writing is much the same. I mean, I am basically just writing my book because I cannot be a normal human being ever again until i have dragged the story out of my mind onto the pages. I don't take it as a big compliment to my own word or anything like that, but I think the haunting helps me develop it.

One idea that just keeps haunting me at the moment is a scene wherein a character loses an eye. It was previously named "Eyecatcher", then scrapped for being too gory. I might put meat back on the menu.

16. What’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever used as a bookmark?

I think I have put the book on the cat once or twice while looking for a stray piece of paper I could use as a bookmark. It, uh, makes a little hut for her? I also have used a knife more than once.

17. Talk to me about the minutiae of your current WIP. Tell me about the lore, the history, the detail, the things that won’t make it in the text.

I think everyone has heard enough about my book project so I'll just talk about the last thing I was working on: A document I made purely to hardcore project on my characters. It still centers around the book characters, but its more of a writing exercise to try to gain insight into their feelings. It plays out towards the end of novel 1 shortly before the whole thing goes ass-up and spans over the course of one night as two characters discuss how they are coping with their situation. (spoiler: not good) (it literally begins with one of them collapsing due to exhaustion). It starts as a comforting-each-other type scenario and ends with them screaming and almost getting into a physical altercation because they just cannot find a compromise to their respective ways. They have a lot of similarities (tendency to bottle up emotions) and differences (wants to share them but doesn't know how vs. wants to be independent at every cost).

"It may be that the people we love the most are the very ones we do not want to see us as weak."

In the end they decide to go through with their plan, it doesn't end well for them as we know.. There's not much lore besides the obvious, but there is a shared history between the characters as they've been friends for almost a decade by then and take time to reflect on whether or not they miss their younger selves. It is partly painful, because they are both sort of broken at that point, and looking back reveals too much of what could have been.

[kimdokjas]

I hope you're having a good weekend!

And no worries about being late, I just didn't want either of us to get in trouble for not doing asks for a week😂😭This is my first time doing this so idk how strict they are ykwim

So far I think the anime and manga for yuukoku no moriarty are really similar! i don't feel like anything was really left out. the manga does have some extra stuff, but i think the anime got some ova's or something, but i haven't been able to get my hands on them yet.

death note is a good anime though i think! there's a reason its a cliche😂yoi was good too, otabek definitely stole my heart though

i am actually fairly new to anime. like i've always been aware of it, i was (still am) a huge geek in public school, so i had heard about naruto and sailor moon back in the early 2010s, but i had no way of watching it myself. my partner is also really into anime, so i've been in the same room when they've watched things, but i didn't personally get into it until a little over a year ago! it was with boku no hero, so that's probably more cliche than death note at this point😂😭

The question for this week is a little more involved, you probably need time to think, so I'm definitely not expecting an answer any time soon. i'd rather you take your time and really think about it if you need to since this will probably heavily influence what i make for you and i want to make sure that you've picked something you really like

What are 5-7 quotes/poems/song lyrics/etc that make you feel ✨feral✨?

I hope you have a good, less hectic week, gaby! sending you positive vibes

-- Love,

Your ASS💖

hello my dear ASS 🥰 ahh sorry again for the late reply! work has been super hectic but thankfully the worst is now behind me! not to jinx it lol but i should have a bit more free time now. it's my first time participating as well so i'm not sure either but jic i'll try to reply a bit more quickly from now on!

oh i’m glad to hear the ynm anime is really similar to the manga! i was debating whether to read it first but i might start out watching the anime and then see how it goes. and right!! otabek is such a sweetheart, i love how at first he seems so stoic and closed off but he has a whole other side of him as well 🥺

oooh bnha is a great starter anime tho! it's one of the first ones i watched as well! same here tho, i've always been sort of aware of anime i just didn't get into it until fairly recently. aww that's sweet that your partner is into anime too! it's like a whole different world at first i think, so it definitely helps when someone you know is also really into it so you can navigate it together lol, so it's nice you can both share that! 💕

ahh that is SUCH a good question! so difficult to answer tho 😭 idk why but every time i try to think of quotes my mind blanks out and i forget every single piece of media in existence lmaoo but i tried my best

“I am. I want to be. I bleed away.” - Jorge Luis Borges (tr. Tony Barnstone), Music Box

"And the salt in my wounds isn't burning any more than it used to/ It's not that I don't feel the pain it's just I'm not afraid of hurting anymore” - Paramore, Last Hope

“In the end, we are all simply 'Outer Gods' to each other.” - Sing Shong (tr. RT & APW), Omniscient Reader's Viewpoint

“I think I could stand anything, any suffering, only to be able to say and to repeat to myself every moment, ‘I exist.’ In thousands of agonies – I exist. I’m tormented on the rack – but I exist! Though I sit alone in a pillar – I exist! I see the sun, and if I don’t see the sun, I know it’s there. And there’s a whole life in that, in knowing that the sun is there.” - Fyodor Dostoevsky (tr. Richard Pevear, Larissa Volokhonsky), The Brothers Karamazov

"The time for sleep is now/ But it's nothing to cry about/ 'Cause we'll hold each other soon/ In the blackest of rooms” - Death Cab for Cutie, I Will Follow You Into the Dark

“If you could only save me/ I'm drowning in the waters of my soul” - Imagine Dragons, Nothing Left to Say

"And what you hear is not silence/ It's just the trees waiting to hear what next you'll hum/ And what you see is not the dark/ It's just the gods upturning ink pots 'cause they know what you'll become" - The Amazing Devil, Inkpot Gods

"For I feared becoming a lonely lump of ashes/ After loving others with my whole being" - Ahn Do-hyun (tr. Jido Ahn), Lonely High Solitary

jsyk i’m resisting making commentary on every single one of these quotes sooo hard rn bc i’ll start frothing at the mouth lmaoo, i listed 8 tho sorry for cheating dslkjsf i just couldn’t cut any of these 😭 if you need more just lmk! i started out with like 15 and it was so hard to whittle down the list lol

tysm for your well wishes dear!! sending you positive vibes right back and i hope you’re having a nice relaxing weekend!! please remember to take care!! 🥰❤