#also it's not like anyone would notice
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William Afton Simps this
Yo man?
#william afton#fnaf#BRI'SH#Funny#I actually don't have the right to judge here because#I'm a fucking springtrap simp#same man#Just hotter#it's the living corpse thing#Springtrap#More like#SpringDADDY#haha#i need to burn this blog#also it's not like anyone would notice#but i changed his eye color#I didn't even need to do this#i could have pulled out a pictures kf BlueysCapsules William#and my point would have still stood#That guy is like...The antithesis of the word āSexyā#he's so ugly i hate him#he better die of DEATH#Average british man#British people who see this#you know how true this is
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Things I've seen tumblr memeing about James Somerton doing Ć la "How did no one see how bigoted he was!" as if those things haven't been a significant part of tumblr culture for over a decade :
Presenting untrue and bordering on conspiratorial versions of (queer or otherwise marginalised) history without any sources
Completely disregarding and disrespecting any expertise on socio-cultural topics/humanities and distrusting academics and historians (incl. acting as if no academics or historians could be queer or marginalised)
Downplaying the role misogyny played in the historical oppression of queer women and concluding that queer men must have been more oppressed than queer women
Bi women are, at best, not as queer as "real" queer ppl, and at worst, simply equivalent to straight women
Despite nominal trans inclusivity, transmasculine ppl are functionally women when convenient (combined with the above, bi transmascs are functionally straight women)
Despite nominal trans inclusivity (bis), shamelessly attacking, threatening and actively endangering any trans woman who questions them or smth they find important (often by unfairly presenting her as violent or as a threat)
Having absolutely fucking wild and reductive takes about ace ppl, the oppression they face and their place in the queer community
Stating that marriage equality is an assimilationist fight while completely ignoring its direct roots in the horrifying consequences of the AIDS crisis for partners of ppl who died of AIDS
Praising western media creators from the past for queer coding even under censure and in the same breath condemning current non western media creators for being homophobic bc their representation isn't explicit enough
Blaming China for all existing homophobic censoring in western media
Assuming all queer media would be better told by western creators and by western standards
Only out queer ppl get to tell queer stories
Heavily criticising almost all queer media created by women or ppl they see as such (see above points about trans ppl) or involving/starring a significant amount of women for any perceived or real amount of "problematicness", but fawning over and praising and negating criticism of queer media created by and starring mostly or even functionally exclusively men (even when it could be argued that, you know, not involving/seriously sidelining women is a pretty clear example of misogyny which should probably be considered "problematic")
And I'm probably forgetting stuff or there's stuff I have internalised myself and don't recognise as an issue
Like idk but I feel like the takeaway from Hbomberguy and Toddintheshadow's videos should maybe be "be aware of such patterns in your communities bc they definitely exist" and not "this guy is uniquely awful" and I feel like a lot of the discussion I've seen surrounding this has been severely failing at that. Most ppl who've spent any significant amount of time on tumblr prob either have internalised at least one of those thought patterns, have had to de-internalise them, or have had to be extremely vigilant to not internalise them (which is done by, you know, seeking out other sources, which also seemed like an important takeaway from the videos)
#Also I'm saying this as someone who actually watched quite a few of Somerton's videos#And noticed those patterns and stopped watching bc I recognised them from here#and had already learned to unlearn them after being so exposed to them here#And tbh I think anyone who hasn't had the luck or made the conscious choice to seek out ppl who pushed against those narratives#Would absolutely have fallen for this man's bullshit. Like let's not kid ourselves we see takes like this every day on this hellsite#2014 me would have. For sure.#This is next to the plagiarism issue which as Harris points out is an Internet wide issue and this includes tumblr#James Somerton#hbomberguy#todd in the shadows#This brought to you by a conversation with my wife yesterday#So many ppl on here don't deserve to meme or be this self absolvingly critical of this man#The call is coming from inside the house#The man has a tumblr it would legit not surprise me if some of the things he supposedly made up himself he did actually get from somewhere#And that somewhere was a tumblr post
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Leo learns something about himself š³ļøāā§ļø
Based roughly on this old post.
Bonus:
[Leo is taking the fact that he was born biologically female simultaneously very well and also not so well but overall heās mostly coping with the fact that it was Draxum that just essentially gave him the turtle equivalent of āThe Talkā.]
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt leo#rise leo#trans leonardo#trans leo#rottmnt headcanons#turtle art tag#rise draxum#happy pride everyone~#if youāre wondering why thereās no backgrounds thatās because my files got messed up so just blankness in the bg sorry#but yeah!#this is forever and always my fav headcanon for Leo it makes too much sense to me#I wanted to make sure I got it done in time for pride haha#I donāt know if itās obvious by the end but Draxum ran off because he was for once doing something nice for Leo#that being leading him somewhere else not in front of everyone so Leo can process the fact that he was born female in peace haha#(but he also just - wanted to avoid the ensuing awkward Talk as long as he could lol)#āhow would Leo NOT knowāā he had an inkling but never thought much of it because heās a teenage turtle mutant with no access to healthcare#also yeah thatās splinterās hand at the end there I just KNOW heād want those pics#also also - Leo here can technically be trans or even intersex in some way too#both is good#making this made me remember why I never do color#at least for comics#it just takes sooo long#but it was fun and worth it for my fave hc#this is like the first time Iāve drawn Draxum and man heās kinda hard to draw#also their sizes are just 1 2 and 3 because Draxum had a simple system in place for sizing his subjects#(aka I was too lazy to think of anything else to put there)#also dunno if anyone noticed but look at Raphās paper and look at his babyās selfās photo
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mombin pt 6 and look who showed up
(1)(2)(3)(4) (5)
#stranger things#platonic stobin#steddie#steve harrington#robin buckley#eddie munson#cw pregnancy#sorry to rob you of the meet cute but steve's got a lot going on. sometimes he needs a tinder date#someone said on my first mombin 'steddies will insert eddie into everything' kshjsdjsdjs#yes i will. i would be betraying myself if i didn't#ALSO#there is a teeny little plothole/inconsistency somewhere in this#it's like. easily explainable#i want to see if anyone else notices it#it's not that the car is backwards btw let's say that was just a crazy u turn
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i dont have a caption for you lol i'll let shanks's heart eyes speak for themselves š«¶
(source)
#mishanks#akataka#dracule mihawk#hawkeyes mihawk#shanks#akagami no shanks#red haired shanks#one piece#one piece fanart#incorrect one piece quotes#op fanart#i have accidentally signed up for too much to draw as lesurely as i have been lol soz š#but i noticed my blog got taken off the mishanks tag's top blog list which clearly means i havent posted enough abt them recently LOL#comic#op comic#shanks: no u dont understand. he only calls me by my first name when he's feeling soft and he would never let anyone else touch his face#especially like that from behind! and first thing in the morning? anyone else would find themselves without a hand.#i call my angel all these lovely pet names and in return he lowers all his walls and i love him š„°š„°š„°#(mihawk on the side is feeling extremely exposed lol)#(but also fond š„° he loves him back so much too!!!)
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when obi-wan said 'I won't kill anakin' and then spent the entire rest of his life following through on that. fuck everyone else obi-wan I respect you yoda should've taken you at your fucking word
'boohoo why did he walk away and not kill anakin this time either even with all the suffering he'll go on to cause if he lets him go' he's told you why very clearly you just didn't believe him I guess!! desperately not killing anakin is obi-wan's main export. it's his universal constant, his life's work, his magnum opus. he gets creative about not killing that guy. he tries to send anakin's teenage twink son to do the job for him because he simply can't. he fucking... peaces out and dies to avoid killing anakin. that's like his whole deal. whether he's right to be like this is another entirely separate conversation but it is what he is
#also it's a prequel and I think we would have noticed if obi-wan killed vader before luke even met him lol#star wars#obi wan kenobi#if anything it's a thrill to me that he had the chance again and. didn't do it. like I said universal constant#'What if I simply. didn't'. and then he didn't. and was sad about it forever. it's the good stuff#this is entirely performative indignation btw I am not vagueblogging at anyone I'm just waxing histrionic for fun lol
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part one here. ze part two to touch-starved stevie that absolutely no one requested hehe <3 but i gots to let my boys have a wee kiss :")
So, hugs with Eddie becomeā¦ well, a thing.
Not a thing. Theyāre not a thing, Steve and Eddie. Itās totally the same as when he gets hugs from Robin. Eddieās doing him a favour as a friend. Itās got the 100% platonic energy of getting a hug from a friend ā a hug that usually melts into some form of a cuddle, limbs all tangled together until they canāt tell whose are whose.
Except, Steve doesnāt really do that second part with Robin. Like he hasnāt done it ever with Robin.
So, itās an Eddie thing.
But theyāre not a thing. Not matter how much Steve would actually very much like for that happen. Okay, maybe Steveās overthinking the whole thing a bit, but he just canāt tell.
Whereās the line? Itās infuriating not being able to discern between platonic and more, just because Steve wasnāt held enough as a fucking baby. Out of all the things he resents his parents for, Steveās surprised that this is so near the top.
Because, sure, Steveās had more than his fair share of hookups. He knows that sort of touch. He knows the shape of lust; the scrapes of fingernails down backs, the tight grips over skin, the push and pull of the heat of the moment.
And this thing with Eddieā¦ is not that.
So, really, Steve knows that itās all friendly. Eddie is just being nice. Heās being a decent dude and helping his friend out ā by catapulting himself into Steveās arms at every opportune moment.
(Steveās only dropped 3 mugs of coffee because of this so far. Itās only because Eddie says good catch, big boy with a devilish grin every time that Steve manages to catch Eddie that Steve hasnāt completely told him to knock it off. Just yet, at least.)
And heās different in other areas. Heāll always seem to choose the seat next to Steve on movie-nights now, content to snuggle right up to him. They get thigh to thigh, arm to arm ā and Eddie only needs to get about 20 minutes in for him to do a big sigh, like an old dog, and slump over, resting his head on Steveās shoulder.
Steve notices though. He always notices.
Itās impossible not toā the skin, even if thereās 3 layers between them, burns blazing warm. Eddieās hair drapes over his arm, a curl inevitably tickling along Steveās collar. He can feel the rise and fall of Eddieās breathing, the little shake of when he laughs.
It drives Steve a little insaneā insane in the way that makes him think about burying his fingers in those curls again, about pressing his lips against Eddieās pretty mouth just to feel the smile against his skin, about digging into his chest so he can climb into his chest and live there.
Yeah, itāsā well, itās safe to say that the effect of Eddieās touchiness has sent what was once a fleeting thought of a crush into mind-melting levels of affection.
But he canāt fucking tell.
-
To Steveās credit, neither can Eddie.
Which is not surprisingly considering sometimes he catches himself wondering how the hell he ended up here; in a close-knit friendship with band-geek Robin Buckley, princess Nancy Wheeler, and King Steve Harrington.
Okay, the Robin one sort of makes sense. He thinks that if no matter when their paths crossed, he and Robin wouldāve always even some sort of strange friends - her snark complimenting his bitchiness. Also, the whole super queer thing helps too. Even the friendship with Nancy works, in its own weird way.
Steve though? Heās the fucking curve ball.
It works though, the two of them. Surprisingly well, actually ā the two of them get on like a house on fire, bitchy quips back and forth. Even better, is the quiet that they can share. Steve loves to come around and doļæ½ļæ½ļæ½ nothing. Do nothing with Eddie, though.
So, even though Eddie had noticed the tension in Steve with touch, little moments where he turned rigid when Eddieās usual wandering hands got too comfortable ā Eddie chalked it up to the usual. Guys bring too uncomfortable with him, too weird about another guy being touchy. It didnāt matter than Eddie wasnāt even out to Steve yet, he was still might be that type of guy.
Well, Eddie had certainly thought so. Sure, Steve might not be one of those jocks who smacked around boys who looked too long in the locker room, but if he knew a smidge of the truth, who really knows. It would explain the tenseness at least.
But thenā āCan Iā¦ have a hug?ā There had been a dozen things Eddie was thinking that Steve couldāve asked for but that? Wasnāt even in the ballpark. It was so left-field it left Eddie speechless for a whole moment. And Steve had been staring at the ceiling, his hands curled up tight again like- like he thought Eddie might say no.
A ridiculous thought, honestly. Anyone who knew Eddie well enough knew he was touchy; loved giving it, loved getting it. Like an overly affectionate cat, Wayne had once called him, just 11 years old, because Eddieās need for affection seem to never be sated.
After that night, Steveās lack of touch became far more obvious. Itās always hair ruffles or high-fives, yet never hugs. Normally, Eddie would keep to that boundary; some people are less touchy other than others, he knows that.
Butā¦ āSometimes I realise itās been awhile, since Iāve had some touch.ā Thatās what Steve had said, his words. Eddie doesnāt even think he meant to say something so heartbreaking. In fact, the guy seemed embarrassed.
It had thrown Eddie for a loopā because Steve gets around. Heās nearly notorious for one-night stands and failed flings, as Robin loves to drone on about considering sheās subjected to all the flirting. What had originally been a point of envy for Eddie, just saturates the bleakness of Steveās words. Sex but without a moment of intimacy.
So, while Eddie is miles away from being the person who gets into Steveās pants ā not for lack of want, mind you ā he does try hike up the touchiness. Little things. Lingering when he taps him on the arm, hooking his chin over Steveās shoulder to peer over it, leaning up against him when theyāre side by side watching a film.
Itās good. It helps Eddie release the pressure of his stupid monumental god-awful crush he has. Yeah, yeah, itās laughable, even to Eddie. Itās like Gay 101; donāt get crush on straight dudes, especially the ones youāre friends with. And yetā¦
Steve lets him. He lets Eddie give him touch, more than he lets anyone else. He still tenses; thereās still always a moment before he can remember to relax, like heās trying to shake off bad thoughts but then he melts. He always melts into Eddieās touch eventually ā in a way Eddie knows Steve actually loves it, drinks it up as much as he can.
And maybe, Eddie is the biggest fool to grace the Earth to let that fact give him some hope. Sue his gooey heart, heās a romantic. Itās a quiet hope but, itās there.
Tonight, it seems relaxing for Steve is been harder than usualā several times has Eddie traced a quite long along Steveās arms, a subtle point that they were far too tense for someone who was wrapped up in cuddles on the couch. āCos thatās 100% what they are now. Eddie will still call them hugs, but usually, when itās just the two of them, it becomes this.
Steve, tucked up into the corner of the couch, one leg flush along the back of the couch and one hanging off the edge. Itās the prime position for Eddie to crawl up, wind his arms around Steveās middle and give him a good squeeze and then settle there. Head on Steveās chest, lying in the cradle of his hips. Safe. Warm.
It makes him warm, oh very warm to know that he gets this. That Steve doesnāt give this amount of trust to many, if any, other people but Eddie ā he trusts Eddie.
āYāknow,ā Eddie says, cheeks smushed against the plain of Steveās pec. It feels deliciously warm and Eddieās fairly sure he can feel how toned it is just through his cheek. Hot bastard. āIām actually real glad you asked for that hug all those weeks ago.ā
He leaves it there ācos he knows Steve will ask. Eddieās eyes stay on the buzzing tv-screen even as Steveās head shifts, turning to peer down at the boy slumped on his chest. Eddieās pretty sure he can see Steveās mouth twitch up into a smile.
āYeah?ā
āOh yeah,ā Eddie affirms, giving a nod and his eyes flick up to meet Steveās for just a moment. āThink Iāve had some of the best hugs in the world.ā
Okay, that was maybe more honest and sappy than Eddie was going for. He is just letting Steve know he isnāt just doing it for Steve ā that he enjoys these moments just as much. He lays it on thick, tries for a smarmy angle.
āSwept up in these pillowy arms?ā He croons, giving Steveās bicep a quick squeeze, making the other chuckle softly. āWho wouldnāt think so? Iām a lucky guy.ā
Despite the joking tone, thereās no quick comeback from Steve. Thatās alright. Eddieās quite happy if this is one of the times Steve just takes the compliment; letās the word sink in and hopefully, believes them, even if itās just a little bit. He watches the film and doesnāt read into the silence.
Not even when Steve says, āEddie?ā all soft. Nearly shy sounding. It doesnāt quite register to Eddieās ears.
āMm?ā
āEddie.ā Steve says again, a little firmer and that catches Eddieās attention. He turns his head and rests his chin on Steveās chest, his brows drawn together in silent question.
But the moment he makes eye contact, Steveās doing that scrunched up face again. Is studying the ceiling instead of facing Eddie. And just like all those weeks ago, his hands clench up tight. Twists up the fabric of Eddieās sweater in between his fingers and uses it to ground himself.
Last time, he asked for a hug. Considering heās currently just about squishing Steve beneath his body weight, Eddie canāt fathom what he might be worked up to ask for. Unless he was going to ask for something more than a hugā which, well, just wasnāt going to happen, even if Eddie really wanted it to.
āCan I-ā Steve starts. He sucks in a breath, almost like heās gathering courage. But heās not, because heās not about to ask for what Eddie hopes for, heās not, heāsā
Unlessā¦?
āCan Iā¦ have a kiss?ā Steve asks, barely audible. The sentence is murmured, soft words that hit Eddie like a gentle kiss in itself ā imprinting right onto his heart. Steve Harrington wants a kiss ā from him!
āOh.ā Eddie says, in a breathy delightful way. Heās fairly certain the little monkey in his brain is clapping its cymbals at double-speed as the words process; or maybe itās his heart, which feels like itās leapt up his throat.
āOh?ā Steve echoes, a smile already playing at the edges of his mouth, because he can see Eddieās want. Because he knows him.
āYes.ā Eddie says suddenly, with a frantic nod, pushing up closer so their faces are aligned. āYes, absolutely, you can.ā He affirms.
Steve huffs a quiet laugh at the eagerness and then his arm that had been slung around Eddie shifts. It moves up til his hand caresses along the line of Eddieās jaw, tilting him just how he likes.
Eddie holds his breath. Counts the freckles he can see this close. Tries to feel Steveās heartbeat through where theyāre pressed so closely together; can Steve feel his? Thundering and hurried, beating so hard Eddie thinks he might bruise the inside of his ribs.
Then Steve kisses him. And shit, Steveās lip are better by ten-fold than every daydream Eddieās ever had about them. Theyāre warm and so soft ā plush and pressing against his own and Eddie is freezing. Fuck, wait, how does this go again? Right, Eddieās neverā¦ well, kissed anybody before.
Steve pulls back and Eddie screws his eyes up ā not ready in the slightest for the disappointment of his own shoddy kissing skills. Fuck, did he really just freeze? Steve ā Steve Harrington ā asks for a kiss and Eddie decides to stab himself in the back by not figuring out how to fuck to kiss back.
āYou call that a kiss?ā Steve teases and Eddieās well aware of the parallel ā of the irony of Steve repeating his own words back at him. But he canāt make himself laugh even though itās funny. Instead, a little groan wiggles out his throat.
āIām sorry,ā Eddie says, earnest. He forces his eyes opens ā he needs to see whatās Steveās thinking. Where heās expecting disappointment or perhaps regret, is only patience. Maybe a touch of concern. Eddie continues, despite the humiliation that makes his throat sticky.
āI havenāt- I donāt do this often.ā He coughs awkwardly clearing his throat and hoping it hides the next word. āEver.ā
Thereās a jump in Steveās eyebrows, a moment of surprise in his eyes that lets him know he did, indeed, hear that final word. It makes Eddie feelā¦ well, itās nice that Steve had expected him to have been kissed by now. Even if he hasnāt. He tries to take it as a compliment.
āThatās okay,ā Steve assures. Absentmindedly, his thumb rubs soothing along Eddieās jaw. It makes Eddie shiver, some outrageous amount of joy clawing into every nerve. Steve likes Eddie. He wants to kiss Eddie.
āDo you want to try again?ā
Eddie nods before the questions even out of his mouth. Steve smiles, all sunshine. This time when he draws Eddie in, he notices the way Eddie holds his breath ā the rigidness in his body.
Steve kisses him again, another short and soft one and then whispers against his lips, āRelax.ā
āCos isnāt tonight just full of the parallels, Eddie thinks. He listens, tries to focus on how sweet Steveās kiss is than his panicky heart, forcing out a breath between the kisses. His hands along Steveās sides find a grip, grounding and good, and by the fourth kiss, he begins to feel a bit melty.
Itās good. Itās really good. Kissing Steve is top 5ā nay, the top moment of his life so far. Somehow, itās made all that much better knowing the build-up behind it. Knowing that Steve knows he isnāt just kissing him for a heat of the moment ā that Eddie wants kisses here, kisses before bed, in the morning, on dates. Eddie wants Steve.
And with the way he kisses, Eddieās pretty sure Steve wants him just as bad.
It doesnāt take long for Steve to reach what Eddie decides is an ultra pretty fuckinā state; lips swollen from kisses, cheeks flushed, hair a little mussed up. He bets he looks no better. The thought makes him grin, enough they have to break the kiss ācos Eddie canāt stop his stupid happy grin ācos shitā he actually gets to have this Steve.
āWhat?ā Steve asks, somehow half heart-eyed and half suspicious at the mischief in Eddieās eyes.
āCan I... have a hickie?ā
now with a part three !
#at this point call this the 'can i' series#sweet boys asking each other for things they most certainly would be given <3#but don't think they will <3#tried to flip it and make it so even tho eddie is used to touch. the romantic touch? he's got none! that's where he's touch-starved#ALSO EVERYONE'S TAGS WERE SO NICE ON THE LAST ONE#trust i am. not feelin so bad nowadays (me saying this like 4 days later lmao)#but <3 thank u all#gay ppl in my phone.... you know what to do#ruby writes steddie#steve x eddie#steddie#steddie fic#steddie ficlet#touch-starved steve harrington#not rlly anymore hehe#does anyone notice that it ends with yet another 'can i?" question? HEHE#yet again stib gets kisses where ruby doesn't but alas <3 dis is way fluffier this time#nearly went the angst route! and went hmmmm naur#ok ok i'll be quiet now
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(wip)
some doodles that took me way too much effort; an updated design for Raal (aka demise when he was a mortal, he still uses that name when in disguise and modeled those forms after how he imagined he would look if he ever grew up as one) and a clunky doodle of both his blade spirits just after forging them
#ganondoodles#art#zelda#tloz#loz#demise#ghirahim#wip#the bowl raal is holding isnt designed yet#but he carved it himself and uses it as the one to carry an offering to the gods in hopes of stopping them talking to him#it gets burned just like him when he goes there though since they wanted to lure him there- the gods dont care about offerings#idk if anyone would notice but .......... yes he named his blade spirits after his parents#rahim is trans#and raal is also afab#bc the gods only choose mortal women to be made into a deity#they dont care that raal doesnt identify that way#........yes his backstory basically starts with his birth ...........#no its not in the comic#my brain just does things#anyway i thought it would be cute to make ghirahims true form look more like demise#sicne hes literally a piece of demise
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main takeaway from certain fan reactions to the finale is this:
the final scene with ankarna was so meaningful to the bad kids' arcs and how they made peace with being wronged by people they loved, and if all you can focus on is that the rat grinders didn't get much screentime, then you don't love dimension20 and you don't love this world: you want to be playing your own hs themed dnd campaign and you're mad the oc versions of the rat grinders you made up in your head acted ooc. these are not your characters and this is not their story.
#sorry but it made me so mad after seeing that scene and the epilogues of tbks progressing on their journey to healing#that all anyone cared about was the fucking rat grinders not getting a steven universe moment to explain how trying to end the world was ok#brennan went out of his way to point out klck CHOSE rage over her friends + abused her party for her own selfish agenda and ppl are mad#that tbks didnt want to revive her. where was this outcry for penelope everpetal who was arguably more manipulated and is also in HELL#i keep harping on that point but its such an obvious comparison i feel insane that these ppl dont get it#ppl are even trying to argue against lucy's own words ab being upset her friend MURDERED her bc they flattened her to their uwu soft girl#like lucy was never a doormat. she was braver than all of them. why would she be unconditionally forgiving at her party for being evil#sorry ur toxic yuri ship sucked. klck didnt care she died. the real yuri shouldve been yolanda and zara. if u even care#actually im more annoyed we didnt some quick zara resolution but ppl are too hung up on trgs to notice#dimension 20#fantasy high junior year#fhjy#fhjy spoilers#fhjy discourse#i guess
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(nsfwish/suggestive followup under cut)
l kept thinking about how fun their texts would be
bonus:
#interview with the vampire#iwtv#loustat#armandaniel#ish#i realize the loustat texts would make more sense if they were depicted from lestat's phone but i was almost done before i noticed SO W.E#tbh the first one of these i thought of was daniel's text to louis#i was enamoured w the idea of daniel sending a pic w a good chunk of his face in the way#art#i just finished reading tvl btw#this is show-only speculation fun ok#also i KNOW daniel and louis can speak telepathically before anyone comes after my ass#just let me have some fun alright...#also this is like the first nsfwish thing i've posted on this blog#its been 84 years...#anyway hi this is scary bye
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learning abt friendship decay and "not reaching out to your friends for months at a time unprompted is not neurotypical behaviour" has me feeling a certain way
#experiencing some BIG FEELINGS OVER THIS REVELATION#listen i have never ever been bothered abt not seeing someone in a while or making time to talk to them bc in my mind its like not thst muc#time has passed. i mean it with every fibre of my being that when im like 'oh its ok even though we havent talked in a while and have our#own things going on it doesnt mean we're not friends anymore since we left things on a good note 8 months ago' i sincerely believe that#and for the longest time i just thought everybody makes peace with it at some point and not automatically assuming the other person doesnt#wanna talk to me anymore or smth. my longest lasting friendships are with ppl who work the same way i just thouhght that was normal#whatever organ everybody has that makes them reach out to their friends and plan hang outs i probably dont have it#i was already hesitant to ask out Alex bc i spend almost every waking hour doing smth that isnt talking to ppl unless they happen to be in#the vicinity. and at first it was bc i planned on making sure i had everything set up so i dont get stressed out and do it one at a time#but then i find out theres a friendship decay mechanic? and after dating and marrying someone you lose -10 friendship points for every#day u dont talk to them?? actually ive probably been losing friendship points this whole time without knowing bc of this?????#and i notice a lot of my own habits are also reflected in how i play bc ive been avoiding getting close to pierre and marnie since its more#of a professional relationship. like i know theyre npcs but im approaching it the way i would in real life its fucking nuts#i think its a little relieving im playing /as/ a character than myself bc as im playing im just making up little interactions in my head#than approaching things the way i would myself so it takes a bit of the stress off trying to put myself in there as a spectator. but well#being in a relationship demands a certain amount of energy even more so when theyre things that already take up energy on its own#like making time to talk to your partner and make sure they know theyre loved. i dont always have energy to put all my mental focus into it#and this is true for real life so im not really bothered by not dating anyone. but when its a game and i want my character to be with someo#and i know its fully optional and i know i could just apply the same logic to this i dont /want/ to. sometimes i want to experience#the same things other people do at least to a certain degree without the same emotional andmental stakes#no offense krobus#yapping#stardew#stardew valley#puppy plays sdv#sdv#this game has me by the ankles man
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the juppet !! i just realised he is jerma posing i swear that was unintentional...... i spent so long digging thru muppet concept art and looking at old puppet designs just to end up doing a rly simple drawing but. i love joehills!! i have only been watching them for like 4 years but their videos r so special to me :3
#i would love to do a more complex drawing inspired by muppet concept art at some point... just wanted to give myself a bit of a break#i've been spending So much time on these drawings every day n it's not really sustainable for me to be spending multiple hours every day#when i have so much work i should be doing...... but i rly enjoyed this silly little muppet even if it's v simple for my standards#tbh i'm surprised i even made it this far into the challenge.. we're like two thirds in ?!!?!#i've only ever completed an art challenge once and that was inktober in 2018... and those were SIMPLE drawings#my standards are a lot higher than they were 6 years ago... but also there's extra pressure because i'm posting these#and i know i don't Have to post them but. it's a way of keeping myself accountable because i am terrible at that without outside motivation#omg why do i always ramble So much in tags this is ridiculous i'm so sorry if anyone actually reads these....#anyways i rly hope my people drawing skills r improving..#i doubt there will be noticable difference but i hope i feel at least a little more confident by the end of this#hermitaday#horsemeatluvr does hermitaday#horsemeat gallery#joehills#joehills fanart#joe hills#joe hills fanart#hermitcraft#traditional art#unedited sketchbook drawings 4 the win (i've given up on scanning n editing these or even taking them in proper lighting... too much effort)#i'm just a little guy
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eah as random tweets i found on my timeline recently
#anyone else noticed lizzie has an almost drastic change from her in the webisodes and then the later specials#or just me#like shes definitely more mellowed out . which is nice but i also sometimes miss her random outbursts they were quite funny#ever after high#eah#eah tweets#iāve seen ppl call cupid briar and hopper the pink trio so i thought it would fit#darling charming#apple white#lizzie hearts#raven queen#hopper croakington ii#c.a. cupid#briar beauty#faybelle thorn#dappling#444cuddle is carrying these tbh
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āHavenāt You Noticed (Iām a Star)ā from Steven Universe works so ridiculously well for Leo
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt headcanons#rottmnt leo#rise leo#listen itās morning now and I havenāt slept so bear with me for the sudden unwarranted lyric analysis haha#a lotttt of the lyrics work so well for him#not even just the overall theme the words just work great#first lyric is literally āI canāt help it if I make a sceneā which is one to one with āLeoās makin a sceneā from the rottmnt opening like-#āIām turning heads and Iām stopping trafficā -> Leo has not made it a secret that he values his looks a LOT#-not just his looks but also his ability to get peopleās attention#āwhen I pose they scream when I joke they laughā -> I feel like this speaks for itself#-posing and joking for the crowd and himself#āIāve got them dazzled like a stage magicianā -> works both with Leoās canonical love of magicians and his aptitude with tricks in general#āwell everybody needs a friend and Iāve got you and you and youā -> I just think itād be cute to imagine his friends here just as his bros#āI got you and you and youā = āmy brainy guy my smashing guy and eats peanut butter with his fingers guyā#āhavenāt you noticed that Iām a star?ā -> Leo loves attention and especially loves when his feats and efforts are acknowledged#+ he loves glam rock and sci-fi and being a champ and - listen he has a LOT of star symbolism with him#āhavenāt you noticed I made it this farā - Leo is well aware of how dangerous situations get and thinks himself only a part of a whole#-so hey itās notable that heās survived this long yeah?#ānow everyone can see me burningā -> self-sacrificing with his family bearing witness + all his star and flame symbolism in general#+ how attention naturally goes to him - including bad attention where his mistakes are highlighted and burn bright#also even the limo lyric-#obviously this boy has never and will never own a limo but one of his main secondary colors IS pink so even that#okay that one is just a joke but he would#(on that note though I think the other colors the boys gravitate to outside THEIR color are fun to notice)#I donāt actually know too much about Steven universe beyond the songs and some eps but I like the music#and this just came to my tired mind so here you go anyone whoās interested#may draw something with these lyrics dunno yet#itās a good song in any case even though itās super short
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ok i swear i'm not going to talk about my breakup forever but the thing that just keeps bothering me:
i know that not getting what you need in a relationship is a COMPLETELY valid reason to end it but also. i feel like having a very vulnerable moment where i opened up about my struggles with intimacy and being relieved that i didn't have to keep doing things i wasn't comfortable with, then being dumped a YEAR later because of my lack of intimacy. is something i should be allowed to be very hurt by???
#ramble#sorry i'm currently in a phase of 'of course this happened' and 'oh i deserve this because i didn't give him what he wanted'#like he knew i was grey ace since the start. and he let it go on for SO long after i said i might be vaguely aro as well#if that's a dealbreaker for you bc of your love language then FINE but NIP IT IN THE BUD#he said he put it off because he didn't want to hurt my feelings but it only hurt me MORE#like you're an adult. grow the fuck up and communicate like one#holding your negative feelings in hoping somebody notices you're hiding them is what TEENAGERS do#and also i told him VERBATIM: i didn't think anyone would ever love me because i'm not comfortable with xyz. and he just confirmed that#idk i still feel like i'm being selfish because how could i expect someone to be in a relationship with me when i can't give them anything#also tmi but it's not like we did NOTHING. we still held hands/cuddled/were close. he just didn't have his tongue down my throat anymore#so obviously i'm assuming by 'missing affection' he just meant sex and as an ace person that just fucking sucks#also oh my god i HATED how much he would imply we were going to have sex. i would have to keep SAYING 'i don't like doing this'#he always spoke like it was inevitably going to happen and it didn't click how GROSS i felt about it until recently#also ALSO not to go there but i never told him WHY i struggle with it (it's sensory issues)#and like. what if something had happened to me that made it hard for me and i just wasn't ready to tell him. and then he did this#again sorry to overshare this is still just a lot for me and i have no idea if i'm being unreasonable#if you're ace and in a relationship please let me know bc i'm starting to think it'll end this way every single time
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#pickle pontificates#they just have a very good and specific flavor#a lot of the stuff I've seen and resonated with the most falls into this category I've noticed#not even like I'm seeking it out it just keeps happening#i like the action and the goofiness you tend to find in shonen stuff#but i think there's something about the way women tend to write characters and emotions that appeals to me personally#not that i think anyone's going to find this that would misinterpret it but obviously it's not like men can't write characters/emotions#that's what i like so much about haikyuu#which was done by a guy as far as anyone knows#and i also love mp100 if you couldn't tell#right now this is about#fma#fmab#tbhk#noragami#but it can be about whatever you want it to and I'm sure it'll be about more stuff for me in the future
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