#also it has come to my attention that the timeline of this is vague

[strangersteddierthings]

"I think we should break up," is what Eddie blurts the moment Steve opens the front door to reveal him.

Steve's first reaction is anger -how dare he?- but he doesn't do anything with that anger. Instead, he takes a deep breath through his nose, crosses his arms, and looks Eddie over.

He's breathing heavily yet his van is parked along the curb. He didn't run here. His hair, while never tame, looks rougher. He is fidgeting but in a nervous way, not his usual too much energy way. His eyes are wide and scared. It's the last bit there that drains Steve's anger.

Something's happened.

He drops his arms and says, "well, you're not dumping me on my porch. Get in here."

This doesn't seem like the response Eddie was expecting. Even though he has been looking at Steve this whole time he still manages to do a double take at him. Steve just shoves the door open a bit wider when he turns and heads back to the kitchen, where the dishes are not washing themselves because he doesn't have a dishwasher.

"I-I'm serious, Steve," Eddie is stammering behind him, which is good. Means he did follow. Steve hears the door shut and the shuffling sound of what he assumes is Eddie trying to pull off his combat boots without untying them, like the animal he is.

"Don't shout at me in my own home! Get in this kitchen," Steve shouts, then smiles and relishes in the offended huff Eddie lets out because Steve is the one shouting. Steve picks up the dish towel he'd deposited on the counter and throws it back over his shoulder, then get back to the dishes. There's just a couple bowls and a pot left, might as well get them done.

The sink is perpendicular to the doorway, so he watches Eddie slink into the small galley kitchen, stopping just inside the doorway to frown at Steve. "I'm breaking up with you and you're just, what, gonna wash dishes?"

"You're not breaking up with me, but yes. Look, one bowl down already. Just two more dishes."

"I- what. Yes, I am!"

"Edifer, you are 24 years old. That's much too old to just show up, yell 'we're over' at someone and run away. We're going to talk about this," he's not sure if it's the nickname, or the scolding parent voice he's put on, but it gets a huff of laughter from Eddie, and he counts it as a win.

"Alright, dad."

Steve grins, "I'll be dad if you be Daddy."

There's some sputtering from Eddie, and Steve gets the final dish done before Eddie says, "you can't just say that when I'm breaking up with you! That's- that's manipulative!"

He shrugs in response. "Seems fair. You're messing with my feelings; I'm messing with your feelings."

Those words freeze Eddie, and Steve can see him processing the words. Did Eddie really not consider that Steve had feelings involved? "I- that's... um."

He takes his time to unplug the sink, rinsing away the left-over bubbles before drying his hands and turning around. Eddie looks less wild and scared, now. More conflicted and uncertain. Which could be a good or bad thing. "Did you think you would just come over, break up with me, and I'd be, like, completely fine with it?"

"No," Eddie is quick to say, "Not completely fine but like, fine enough. It's- we've only been together for a month."

Steve frowns at that. He's not going to take offense to the 'only' added in there, because he's grown a lot over the last four years. He's mature now. "Sure, but beyond that, we've been friends since the world almost ended. I don't understand. I thought we were on the same page, here."

Eddie's fidgety again, in the bad way, pacing up and down the length of the kitchen. "What if this was a mistake?"

"What if it wasn't?"

That stops Eddie in his tracks, whipping around to look at Steve. "What if this goes bad? What if you meet someone else and they can give you everything I can't? What if-"

"Whoa, Eddie!" Steve shoves off the sink and gets to Eddie in two steps. His hands come up, hovering. He wants to touch, comfort, but... well, if he allowed to? "I- where's all this coming from?"

"Dustin and Suzie broke up!"

"What?"

"Dustin and Suzie broke up!! They were the forever couple! Perfect for each other! If they couldn't make it work, how am I supposed to be able to?"

Ah. The root of it. Eddie, afraid he's not good enough. Fuck it. Eddie can shove him off if he doesn't want Steve to touch him. He slides an arm around Eddie's waist, his other hand going up to caress his cheek before cupping it, a move he knows makes Eddie melt like cotton candy on the tongue. "Eddie, baby, we make it work by working on it. Not just giving up."

Eddie does melt into Steve, his own arms wrapping around Steve (probably against Eddie's will). "I- I don't know what I'm doing. I'm gonna fuck this up and you'll hate me, and everything will be ruined."

"Well, that's melodramatic."

Eddie glares at him even as he nuzzles into Steve's palm. "Rude."

"Baby, so long as you just talk to me, we'll be okay. Don't just show up and declare you're gonna break up with me. I think there's some steps we can take before it gets to that."

He watches Eddie swallow thickly before he nods his head. "Yeah. Yeah, okay."

"So, we okay? You aren't gonna break my heart?"

Eddie whimpers at that, throwing himself forward to shove his face into Steve's neck. Steve settles his hand on the back of Eddie's head, idly scratching it while his other arm tightens its hold. When Eddie speaks, it's muffled and directly into his skin. "No. No breaking hearts."

"Hmm, good," Steve says, content to hold his boyfriend in his kitchen for however long Eddie wants to be held.

He'll call and check in on Dustin a bit later, too.

[microclown]

I was rewatching s1e3 and something finally clicked for me..

Please forgive me if this seems obvious to you. It helps me to type out my thoughts, but I'm sure I'm just an idiot and no one else needs this explained to them, lol. That said - I was always slightly confused by the emotional weight of the holy water arc during the flashback sequence. Particularly I was confused by how angry Crowley got when Aziraphale referred to their relationship as fraternizing in the 1862 fight. I mean, "to associate or form a friendship with someone, especially when one is not supposed to" is exactly what they are doing, right? So why the 80 year breakup?

Crowley says he wants the holy water for if "it" all goes pear shaped. The phrasing is necessarily vague, and could mean lots of things. Since I know what he eventually uses it for, I was thinking about it in the context of Armageddon, or maybe more generally and vaguely about Crowley not always choosing to go along with Hell, and associating with Aziraphale. But there was not much reason for Crowley to already be thinking about Armageddon back then.

As we know from the full diary entry Neil posted, the timeline of the Edinburgh entry, and the cut bookshop opening scene, it seems like Crowley and Aziraphale were spending A LOT of time together by the 1800's. When Crowley is pulled back down to Hell in 1827, he learns that Hell is paying more attention to him than he'd previously thought. Crowley realizes at this point that spending so much time with Aziraphale is actively putting him in real danger. He recognizes that, and instead of breaking things off, or seeing Aziraphale less, he doubles down. If this relationship is dangerous, then he wants the tools to fight for it.

That's what I think I didn't get about the holy water request. It's not just general insurance, it's specifically insurance for if Hell finds out about him and Aziraphale. It's also a super vulnerable request because in making it, Crowley is openly acknowledging how important their relationship is to him. Aziraphale casually brings up the arrangement at the beginning of the conversation, and that's part of it, right? Because the whole basis of their relationship is the arrangement. It continues to be the pretense under which they meet, despite the relationship clearly having developed beyond that. And the arrangement, as Crowley proposed it in 537, is born out of convenience, and the assumption that Heaven and Hell would never notice anyway.

Crowley's request for insurance breaks that facade. He's acknowledging that it's not convenient, or safe, but he wants to do it anyway, despite the risk.

Aziraphale, on the other hand, is not ready for the screen to be taken away so abruptly. To make it worse, he assumes Crowley wants the holy water as an escape, rather than a weapon. Suddenly he is confronted with both the danger their association poses, and the idea that Crowley might choose to take his own life. He can't imagine the guilt of being directly responsible for the latter.

I also think the strength of his own emotional response to the thought of losing Crowley catches Aziraphale off guard. He hasn't admitted to himself how much he actually cares, and it scares him. Worrying about Heaven is more comfortable and familiar, so he falls back on that and switches to "If they knew I'd been... fraternizing!"

But bringing up the threat of Heaven reads to Crowley as Aziraphale saying "You may be willing to put yourself at risk for the sake of our relationship, but I am not." The word choice of "fraternizing" comes off as a dismissive and demeaning way to describe a relationship that Crowley just admitted he would risk his life for.

It's an unintentionally deep cut when Crowley is already at his most vulnerable, and so he lashes out. As far as we've seen, this is possibly the first time Crowley has truly lashed out at Aziraphale. So yeah, 80 year breakup makes sense!

And what makes this so much worse is what happens next. Crowley reaches out again in 1941 with a dramatic gesture (rescuing Aziraphale from the Nazis, saving his books). It's clear they've missed each other. They don't discuss the fight, but it's there subtextually. Aziraphale, tentatively and thrillingly, refers to them as friends, for the first time ever. He tells Crowley that he trusts him.

And then, that very same night their worst fears are confirmed. Just when they've finally reconciled a fight over the dangers of their relationship, and just when Aziraphale has finally admitted that it is not a relationship of convenience, but genuine friendship, they are exposed. Crowley is going to face punishment from Hell, explicitly for being Aziraphale's "trusted confident", and he doesn't have insurance. If Aziraphale's trick hadn't succeeded, Crowley would have had no way to protect himself.

idk it just makes me feel things ok

[quillyfied]

Happy Halloween and Happy Ghostfuckers, time to dig into the chest cavity of this episode and not come back out until the next! Another banger of an episode; someone in the Helluva Boss tag called it the Truth Seekers of season 2, and I am so inclined to agree, actually. Equal parts reaction and analysis, and 100% spoilers, like, did that even need to be said?

First: MILLIE MY BELOVED. After a season and a half (over five whole years) of some pretty lukewarm development and attention, having this episode start off with Millie being her happy cheerful self is already such a breath of fresh air, especially given the relentless nonstop personal drama Blitzo and Stolas have been part of for the last couple of episodes. It’s great that this episode is starting after a brief time skip, too; feels more natural for an audience that has had three months to process it all. Watching Millie step right into emotional support is amazing, too, for reasons that have been hinted at before; Happy Campers was so good for her and Moxxie’s characters and I’m prepared to fight about it. Having one of the few women in the cast be relegated to “emotional backbone” doesn’t feel as bad when she’s already expressed insecurity about her importance in life, shown that being an unbelievable badass doesn’t always give her the kind of attention she wants, and isn’t afraid to knock the people in her life down a peg when they aren’t supporting her back. Yes that was just from Happy Campers, and this episode reinforces that with further excellent context. But sshh. We’ll get to that later. Time to watch Loona and Moxxie breaking down because they’re sick of Blitzo’s shit but not to the point of leaving him yet (because they love him too shsshhhshshsh).

Interesting that after a few weeks of moping, NOW is when Blitzo is starting to ramp up his destructive behaviors; what tiny glimpses we were allowed to get in the mission shorts showed a Blitzo that was coping but seemed to be holding it together (you’ll pry the idea that Blitzo’s inability to work the crystal in Mission: Antarctica is directly related to his confidence, not his skill, out of my cold dead rotten hands). This sudden left turn into emptying IMP’s bank accounts and forcing Moxxie and Loona to act out his grief with him appears…new. Maybe lying around eating ice cream and cheese (bro) like a sad sack while watching human television isn’t a new behavior, but the Blitzo-level catastrophic destruction masquerading as retail therapy reads to me as a sudden snap, maybe due to the proximity of a certain lunar cycle. It’s certainly looking on par with running three rings to Wrath and maxing out someone else’s credit cards on shitty horse riding lessons (something that, based on the vague timeline I’ve been able to wrangle out of this godforsaken show, Millie wouldn’t have been present for, though to be fair it’s not like Blitzo ever really has a measured emotional response to anything).

(Viv, if you’re listening, consider this a brief cosmic request for Secretary Stolas to help poor Moxxie with this paperwork. Please. PLEASE. PLEEEEASE.)

I love too that Millie’s approach as default team Emotional Intelligence isn’t to meddle, either, because that also shows maturity on her part; letting the grown ass adults around her handle their shit while still being sweet to them is such a good and necessary component of the IMP team. Hang on having another Millie Feelings Moment while trying to have some sort of chronology here.

…it’s entirely purposeful that Bethany Ghostfucker has Charlie’s hair, right? Because they share a voice actress? Which means…Blitzo has now cosplayed some reference of Charlie…THE STREAMS THEY ARE CROSSING.

I also love how nOTHING could have prepared me for realizing that Blitzo’s outfit in this episode is a cosplay. Of a HUMAN. WHO FUCKS GHOSTS. I don’t know why I am so surprised at how literal the title is; this show continues to both sicken and delight me XD (raunchy humor isn’t my thing and Blitzo was definitely pushing it for me this episode, but also…it’s so nicely balanced with the real emotional breakdowns that I can’t even be mad about it)

Anyway, back to Millie and her Emotional Genius: very glad that she realizes what Blitzo is going through requires a little more babying than usual, and VERY glad that she and Blitzo already have an established system for when he needs to be babied and she doesn’t initially cave to it (I will be buying that magnet, thanks Spindlehorse). I also love how Millie encourages Loona to step up and help Moxxie (who also desperately needs some help, but Millie really can’t focus on him right now because she needs to focus on the root of the problem, which is Blitzo), essentially through begging but also just by being her usual kind self. And that quiet little moment of Millie using Loona’s name for maybe the first time ever is just…mwah. Chef’s kiss. No notes.

Sidetracking again to wonder why the subject of ghosts is just now coming up when Blitzo literally has an alert light labeled “Ghost.” Like. I feel like Blitzo believing in ghosts while Millie staunchly does not is such a good dynamic to play with, but also why is this the first that it’s being addressed. XD Okay, I get it, throwaway gag from the first episode that is becoming relevant now and maybe didn’t have that much thought put into it when it was first made, but I can dream. Or pick relentlessly at tiny details while completely missing the bigger picture. It’s fine. I’m fine.

What I’m not fine with is how Blitzo can completely trash the van in nearly the same way two episodes in a row (assuming that IMP going on the run is happening in Mastermind, which is far from a given, but phwoar would it be maximum emotional impact, to have an episode showing IMP finally moving into their shitty office and how much it means to them, only to have it ripped out from under them the next episode LOLOLOLOL). I’m mostly irritable that my prediction was untrue :P Although I am glad that the prediction that this hotel guy was Leviathan was disproven, because let’s be honest, that would make no sense. Some rando infestor demon, though? Totally on point. Also makes sense why he “falls” for Blitzo’s bullshit disguise; he knows they’re imps because he’s also a demon. Something new to play with. Though it’s interesting that even when Rolando goes rooting through Blitzo’s head, he still doesn’t seem to know either of their real names. Informational blind spot? Would make sense, with how the fight goes down, but later. Later.

Side note to wheeze with relief because when I first watched this episode, it was without subtitles, and I thought Igor was wheezing Blitzo’s name. Him saying “bitch” makes more sense actually. That’s fine. It was much creepier thinking he was saying Blitzo’s name actually XD

Listen. Listen. We know that Blitzo sort of self-medicates with sex and sexual humor. We know that he’s loaded his confidence eggs into the competent at sex basket, because his competence at emotions has a body count (literal). Much like how it was painful to watch Blitzo operating at maximum asshole behavior at the beginning of Apology Tour what with his relentless insistence at returning his relationship with Stolas to safter, sexier ground…watching Blitzo try to distract himself with a sexually charged silly new hobby is equally painful. Because for him, sex is surface level, because anything deeper is dangerous (lord above please ignore the innuendo IGNORE IT). If sex happens to come with emotional attachment, he ruthlessly severs it. But Blitzo being horny isn’t the problem, it’s his disregard for the people that get caught up in his horniness (and he certainly knows how to weaponize his raunchy humor and sexual charisma when it suits him). The Scooby Doo antics are hysterical, but watching Millie start to buckle under the strain of indulging Blitzo is as fascinating as it is inevitable. We already know Millie doesn’t have infinite patience even for Moxxie. So to watch her reach her limit with Blitzo when she might be the only person in IMP whom we have never seen snap at him…delicious. Absolutely the best. And GOOD ON HER for snapping at him for cutting her off, which is a thing he does all the time with everyone ever but rarely gets called on (because he’s waltzed off at that point usually).

And, as I dearly hoped, it’s Millie that starts to really get through to Blitzo, not by being gentle, exactly, but by being her refreshing blunt-not-bludgeoning self. She gives Blitzo the reaming he deserves, but doesn’t belittle him about it; she just points out that his behavior is harmful, draws a boundary, and leaves. Exactly what Blitzo needs…though his brain is certainly going to fuck with him about it first, because lol rejection-sensitive dysphoria being exacerbated by fucked up haunted trauma illusions is a BITCH.

When the gif for this episode dropped and it was Blitzo sliding down a ventilation shaft, I never saw a single other person remark on the dark liquid in the corner of the gif sliding down the shaft after him. I didn’t say anything about it either, just noted it and freaked out quietly every time the gif passed me by. NOW KNOWING THE CONTEXT OF THE DARK SLIDING LIQUID MAKES IT WORSE. I already suspected it was blood (Hellborn blood to be exact). I did not suspect that it would be THAT MUCH BLOOD. Though it’s interesting that Blitzo doesn’t recognize it as such, never calls it that, never seems to realize it. So. Maybe it isn’t blood (spoiler: it’s not blood, I am just dumb and didn’t realize what it is until a third viewing, good job me), but it sure as hell resembles Hellborn blood enough that I have the heebie jeebs. And the visuals are just SO CREEPY—Blitzo is practically drowning in it as he’s dumped into a waking nightmare, and like. Blitzo is an assassin by trade now, and we know IMP did a lot of in-Hell contracts before switching to corner the Sinner market, so there would ostensibly be a lot of Hellborn blood on his hands, but he doesn’t care about that. A job’s a job. The blood he feels guilty about…well…we know, okay, I won’t insult y’all’s intelligence by rehashing it, because it’s about to be made real damn obvious anyway.

THE HAUNTED MILLIES BEING ALL THE TIMES SHE COULD HAVE DIED IN PREVIOUS JOBS THOUGH. Bless the people smart enough to pick that up and throw that spaghetti at the wall because folks it STICKS, it’s so obvious and SO GOOD. And SUCH a neat little insight into Blitzo’s head, too: he cares SO MUCH about his employees, his family, and it does actually haunt him, how many close calls they’ve had. It does occur to him that his actions affect others. It’s just never bothered him, certainly not to this degree. I fully blame Apology Tour and Verosika for getting him started on considering how his actions have consequences for other people, how he “hurts other people’s fee-fees” but also routinely leads his team into dangerous situations where his mistakes could cost them all. And these phantom (lol f-word) versions of Millie not only driving this home through the visuals, but saying the quiet part out loud, asking Blitzo if he realizes this about himself? If he’s ever loved someone without hurting them? FUCK.

I said so many times I wanted Blitzo broken in half; I have FEASTED, friends, because Blitzo’s issues are bigger than Stolas and if he doesn’t address them, he won’t ever be happy with himself, let alone with anyone else, romantic or platonic. ALSO, feast upon the intersecting themes between Helluva Boss and Hazbin Hotel, because “you think you can change?” immediately put me in mind of “addict trash like you doesn’t change,” which…I believe whole-heartedly is something that Val said to Angel, maybe even said in that moment, but the framing of it and Angel’s character arc made it so clear to me that Val’s words had become Angel’s own. Except Angel started proving him wrong. He started struggling, however small and desperately and weakly, to change who he was, to become someone he actually liked instead of what everyone else wanted and liked. Blitzo is in the same boat. Because both of these shows are so much about how hard it can be to become a better version of yourself, especially in a world that’s set against you being that person, that will hurt you for daring to be better, to be different, to be YOURSELF. What Blitzo is going through right now is the emotional beat-down that every person who has ever wanted to self-improve despite (or maybe even because of) trauma or mental illness puts themself through. If you’ve ever been this mean to yourself and driven yourself to a sobbing panic attack, clap your hands (clap clap).

And then the low blow. The tearjerker. The cry-maker.

Teenage Blitzo running to his mother. Calling out for Mama. Telling her about the scary dream he was having. AND SHE COMFORTS HIM. She never turns on him, she’s never angry, she never even flinches as she’s burning alive in front of him. Ghosts aren’t real (sad) and we aren’t ever going to meet Tilla except through other people’s eyes, most likely Blitzo’s, but that double-edged knife of knowing that Blitzo both was so loved and loved so hard back, only to be the one who got her killed…we’ve known as an audience for a while now that this is the biggest burden on Blitzo’s soul, the one thing he may never forgive himself for and can’t conceive of anyone else forgiving, because it’s what’s Fundamentally Wrong with him: he makes everyone’s lives worse. How can he love when he is so completely destruction incarnate? How can he reach out to Moxxie, to Millie, to Loona, to Stolas, to Fizz, when the person dearest to him crumbled to ash in his hands and it’s his own fault?

How can Millie look at him and tell him he’s wrong, that he made her life better?

Fuck hang on cry break FUCK I forgot to remove my eye makeup before doing this lolololol

Okay. Pivoting to scrutinizing this flashback, because the first thing that is immediately apparent to me (besides how hot Millie and Blitzo are DAMN) is how much older and more tired Millie looks. Millie in particular. We’ve become accustomed to Millie looking a certain way, so the new look is certainly exciting, but it’s the expression that’s really the kicker here. She looks hardened and badass, but so, so tired. She’s tired of just being the muscle. She’s tired of scraping by for a buck, and fewer of them than she deserves. My theory that Wrath is saturated with imps of a similar skill set is correct; my theory that Helluva Boss isn’t going to address the class/race issues they’re drawing on in any meaningful way might yet be disproven. Because Millie doesn’t have horrific family trauma. What she has is what every imp has: systemic oppression and its accompanying insecurities. We got hints of this back in Happy Campers, when she was so thrilled to be the center of attention and important and liked, and NOT for how well she kills people. Now it has further context, and is why Millie being the Emotional Support of the team is so important to her as a character: she never thought she could be anything else. She never let herself believe she could be anything but someone’s underpaid goon that was going to die an early death and be as meaningless as everyone told her she was. Until Blitzo and IMP carved out a space for themselves and moved to THE TOP RING IN HELL. The one where Lucifer lives, the one where the Goetia seem to congregate, the one ring that, despite being a flaming hellhole (lol) that is full of weird dead humans and is constantly being beset by angels at least once a year, is considered the one place imps can’t make their mark. Gosh this episode is so important for making so much of that thinly-veiled subtext all throughout Helluva Boss into text, for underlining Striker’s compliment to Blitzo for making a name for himself by owning his own business, for saying EXPLICTLY AND OUT LOUD that imps aren’t even good enough for the shittiest, most moth-eaten office in Pride.

I’m still not holding my breath on Helluva Boss actually solving anything socially within itself, because that seems like a tall order. But it is no longer too much to ask for Stolas to grapple with some pretty heavy questions about his behavior and his preconceived notions, his internal biases and the ways he has hurt Blitzo in return. SECRETARY STOLAS PLEEEEEASE, I AM BEGGING.

Anyway. Time to drool over the fight choreography, first of this fight between Millie and Blitzo, because it’s GORGEOUS. They have what I was hoping so hard for them to have: fighting as a love language XD Blitzo and Millie understand each other on a pretty instinctual, almost primal level; their fight is a dance, not just because they’re both good at it. It’s an extension of their friendship, or what will become their friendship. Their bodies are their most basic communication tool, Millie often through touch and snuggles, and Blitzo through either fighting or fucking, depending on what’s needed. They both have killer instinct, which Moxxie’s anxiety often chokes out within himself and which Loona hasn’t really had the chance to hone.

I also love that moment before Blitzo tips the pool table, the whole “reputation is everything” “Oh yeah? So what’s your reputation?” Because. BECAUSE!! Millie is an exceptional assassin, but in this fight in particular, she is so different from how she is in the rest of the show. She’s a proper Wrathian imp assassin, angry and hard and relentless. Compare that to the beginning of Ozzie’s, when she scuttles into frame holding an axe in her teeth and screeches about how she’s still so jazzed up, clearly amped and so much more joyful than she is during this flashback. Again, said it at least twice, will say it once more: she looks so exhausted, like she’s burning herself out just to make it. And she isn’t a unique case in that regard by any means. It’s working for Blitzo that makes her unique, that gives her joy in her work instead of making her rely on how other people see her. Sinners already don’t care about her or her feelings; her next meal isn’t contingent on appearing as hardened and badass as possible, it’s on a Sinner having a grudge, which is an exclusive meal ticket that only Blitzo could have weaseled them into.

I also want to point out that this fight between Blitzo and Millie? Pretty well mirrored by the fight between Millie and Rolando!Blitzo. The way Millie blocks him with her forearm, the way she slams him into the wall—those are things Blitzo did to her, back during their first fight. Granted, Millie getting the coolest anime punch-stop of all time is something that’s all hers, because Millie is so special and had no idea until she found a new life. She is the happiest imp there ever was and she kicks no less ass for it.

(WHERE IS MY TIMELINE, IMP WAS AROUND FOR A YEAR BEFORE THEY GOT THE BOOK AND THE OFFICE. Unsure of how long after meeting Loona and Moxxie this meeting with Millie takes place, and this does scramble around the timeline of how long Blitzo had the book before Stolas calls to make the arrangement, and where does Moxxie and Millie’s marriage fit into this? They’ve only been married a year, so probably started dating pretty soon after meeting…still have no idea on when Stolas and Blitzo’s first time happened and how long after that was Loo Loo Land. I will tie myself into knots over this, must stop now.)

Anyway. Putting the fights to bed for the moment, gotta get in on those good good BFF snuggles, which will go immediately into Blitzo’s Trauma: The Movie. After Rolando does the honor of driving home the point that yeah, imps have it real fuckin’ bad in Hell canonically and textually and said out loud and everything, thanks for asking.

…oh. Right. Rolando dissolves into black goo. Blitzo wasn’t crawling through a tunnel of blood. It was a tunnel of Rolando. That’s somehow worse. Ah well. My point about Blitzo’s regrets and visually looking like he’s wading through Hellborn blood stands.

Small detail that’s standing out to me in this episode: how much Blitzo is holding his chest during the Rolando fight. Wondering if he’s cupping the pendant he almost lost, or if he’s injured in the chest pretty badly. Which is SO IRONIC if true, because. Y’know. Feelings. His are hurting.

Gosh this fight with Rolando is so scary, though. We’ve never seen infestor demons before (unless you count the Glam sisters, but they weren’t in their element, so to speak), and the power differential between Rolando and Blitzo and Millie is pretty stark. Different from the fight between Striker and Millie and Moxxie, Striker overwhelms with skill. Rolando is overwhelming with power. Don’t you just hate it when higher-class demons have special powers that reinforce the hierarchy? Bullshit. Anyway. THE FIGHT TAKING PLACE NEAR THE POOL IS SO GOOD. Because why wouldn’t an Envy demon have the water advantage? They’re literally fish people. And it’s TENSE OKAY.

BUT NOT AS TENSE AS BLITZO’S TRAUMA: THE MOVIE IS ABOUT TO BE.

I find it particularly significant that Rolando licks up the scarred side of Blitzo’s neck and then says a few minutes later that Blitzo’s level of insecurity is “intoxicating.” Yeah I imagine he’s super tasty to demons who feed on that kind of thing. See previous horrific trauma hallucination. Which I now have reason to believe wasn’t based entirely in reality; we already know all the Millies didn’t die that way, and now a snapshot of Blitzo finding the pendant in the wreckage. He didn’t watch his mom burn to death, not the way he was forced to watch in this episode. Goddamn. Rolando is an asshole, huh?

The Cash backslap really took me aback, actually, not just because Blitzo flinches away from it. The stills show that Cash does it while holding Blitzo’s still-burned wrist in his other hand, so this is really soon after the fire; one has to wonder if Cash did it because Blitzo caused his mother’s death, or if it’s just for the circus. Hard to get a read on Cash, no idea what his attitude towards Tilla is besides a gleeful willingness to use her to manipulate his son. I suppose I’m also shocked because I never really doubted that Cash probably hit Blitzo at least a little, but…a backhand, to me, reads of casual violence, something that’s done without much thinking about it. The way Stella reared back to backhand Stolas and we know by her shocked expression that he’s never caught her wrist to avoid the impact before. Terrible comparison, by the way, and by terrible I mean great but causing me emotional distress. I hadn’t suspected that Cash was likely just as physically abusive as he was emotionally abusive towards Blitzo. Nice to have the confirmation. I hate it here.

Okay, because I haven’t seen the screenshots anywhere yet: first scene of Millie and Moxxie is from Murder Family when Moxxie unties them. Second…I don’t know, actually, and I’m embarrassed to admit that. Maybe Truth Seekers? I could make the argument for Exes and Oohs if Moxxie was in a wedding dress, but I’m not sure. Any of the many times Blitzo has intruded on their time together, I suppose. And, fun fact: the shots that are playing in Blitzo’s eyes when Rolando forces Blitzo’s eyes open are the ones of Fizz and Verosika in Ozzie’s again. In case that was information you wanted. It’s also upsetting that Loona in LA is part of the reel of Blitzo Thinking Everyone Hates Him, because the fight in Spring Broken at least makes sense to flashback to. Though I do keep forgetting, constantly and with an insistence that infuriates me, that Loona and Blitzo were also having a fight during Seeing Stars and when she kicks him off of her at the end, it’s while Blitzo is apologizing for threatening to replace her.

I find it very interesting that there’s a split-second of Barb that cuts in when the Stolas part of the reel plays; it’s so fast, but right after Blitzo pulls away from Stolas’ hand in Ozzie’s, there’s a second shot of Barb as she’s yelling at him in Happy Campers. Significance? Probably that their separation hurts him just as much as his current one with Stolas, he’s just had more time to try and get used to it. Or represses it more.

Oh hey. Blitzo in his head is back in uniform, crystal and all. Nice. I didn’t even realize it. (…Crystal and all. Like it’s become part of his self-image already. HMMM.)

So interesting that Rolando chooses the most obvious pressure points to try and get to Millie…without realizing that coming out of Blitzo’s mouth, it completely robs them of power BECAUSE of their heart to heart. Millie already knows in her core that Blitzo rejects that image of her, because it’s an image of himself that he also rejects and he refuses to let her wallow in it. Their friendship is built on, well, building each other up in that way. Why in fuck would Millie listen to this asshole wax on and on about how she’s a lowborn inbred hick (what the fuck dude) when he’s currently possessing the guy who helped her break that image of herself? Like. Come on, asshole, use your brain, not your bigotry. But I guess that’s also the point of this episode, showing with explicit clarity that IMP is special because of all the anti-imp sentiment they’ve had to wade through and dismantle within themselves, so why would a supposedly “superior” demon think he had to hit any harder or more precise than that? Also. Though. The careless way Rolando is just throwing around Blitzo’s body is pretty sickening.

Special moment of silence for how Millie knows that Blitzo can take a beating that few others can and uses that to expel Rolando. I’m not crying. It’s fine.

“You’re dead, Bethany!” This is. Such a weird thing to say. Especially when you just went on a pleasure cruise through this guy’s deepest darkest fears. You can pull out what haunts him in the night, but not his name?? Counterpoint: he didn’t CARE to pull out Blitzo’s name. Because he’s an imp.

The knocking Rolando into the pool thing was hysterical, though. Such an anticlimax. Right before the electrocution and the eye-popping and all. Lol.

“FUCK hotels!” Says the man who was casually cosplaying an aspect of the princess of Hell who runs a hotel. I love these shows. I love the casual interplay between them. A crossover one day would be the best thing ever.

“I’ve never had a real friend that I didn’t want to fuck.” That is such a blisteringly honest thing for Blitzo to say that I don’t think he expected it to come out of his own mouth. And I love that Millie knows it has nothing to do with her and everything to do with Blitzo, and how Blitzo feels about Stolas. I just don’t think Blitzo realized he felt that way until he said it out loud.

And wrapping this all up with a nice bow with some Loona and Moxxie character growth, where she ACTUALLY takes care of him instead of leaving him to his own devices! Giving half a shit prevents arson, folks, love to see it.

This had the exact structure of Truth Seekers that got me hooked on this show in the first place: cutting the raunchy humor (which is hit or miss with me, usually don’t like it overmuch) with really deep, complex, and honest character moments. The way Blitzo mentors both Moxxie and Millie in different ways while still relying on them is just so satisfying. Even more satisfying is seeing Blitzo change from a one-note loud pervert into a complicated guy who has real feelings about other people and doesn’t actively want to hurt the people he cares about because he DOES CARE. He’s a fuckup, and he’s trying, and it’s so, so, SO good.

I’m sure I have forgotten to wax eloquent about something or other, but it’s almost four hours later and definitely almost five thousand words into this thing, so I’m gonna cut myself off here. Toodles! See you all in November for Mastermind, which is gonna be FINE I’m sure!!

[joeyalohadream]

Little angsty, pining!Gale fic

Sat down to right something and wrote this instead. I don't usually write anything that's not at least somewhat fluffy, but it's the mood I'm in lately, I guess. LOL. Sorry, I'll be out of my funk soon, hopefully!

Takes place in England, vague-timeline, but before Regensberg.

AO3 Link

“I was so busy this afternoon, I didn’t even have time to eat a thing. This wine will go straight to my head.”

Her voice is musical, her laugh bubbles after it in a charming cadence. John’s eyes crinkle at the corners and the skin of his face stretches with the force of the smile he directs at the woman nestled under his arm in the booth. 

Gale had started his night nestled under that same arm, in that same booth. 

John laughs with her, a quiet, fond chuckle, and tells her that food is an important thing to make time for. He pinches her chin between two fingers and makes her head move to where he wants it to go, whispers something in her ear that makes her cheeks flame and then he turns away to laugh at something Curt says. Gale’s palms are sweating.

Two days ago, after interrogation, John had watched him, concern heavy in his blue eyes, as Gale had pushed the food around his plate. He’d kicked him under the table and nodded at the untouched food in front of him when he’d drawn Gale’s gaze and then he’d lectured him on taking better care of himself on the walk back to barracks. He’d also given him a chocolate bar that he’d pretended to pull from behind Gale’s ear. And smiled at him with fondness in his eyes as Gale savored the entire thing, refusing even a bite for himself.

It made Gale feel important in a way not much else did, having John’s focus, his care. It made him feel too much and crave more. It was dangerous. 

John hadn’t gone out that night. He’d stayed in with Gale when he’d said he needed a quiet evening and they’d played gin rummy and talked about everything except for the war. His attention hadn’t drifted from Gale once until they’d finally called it a night and gone to bed.

Gale had laid awake wondering if he would star in John’s dreams and then fallen asleep feeling foolish. 

Now, Gale watches this beautiful woman watch John and he recognizes the look in her eyes. She wants his attention back on her, doesn't want to share it with the other airmen. He wishes he couldn’t relate. 

“You know, I have a friend, still sippin’ her drink with the girls, waiting for a handsome pilot of her own.” She says the words too loud, but her goal is achieved as John’s head turns to follow the sound of her voice and just like that, she has John’s attention while Gale has everyone else’s. 

She eyes Gale with a smile, red lipstick making her teeth look bright white. Gale wants to tell her that John isn’t hers. That last week it was a different woman sitting in her place and tomorrow it will probably be another. He keeps his face impassive.

He tries not to squirm even as he chooses to stay silent instead of outright balking at the idea of entertaining a woman all night. The pretending is harder to stomach than solitude. The toothpick in his mouth needs to be replaced. It’s too saturated and frayed from the extent he’s been worrying at it. 

As always, John comes to his rescue. 

“Buck here has a beautiful girl back home.”

He doesn’t. 

“He won’t so much as dance with anyone that's not her.”

He says it like he always does, like he finds it endearing. Gale hates the way he wishes his voice held some kind of bitter emotion. But as always, it is just warm affection in his tone when Gale is the subject that colors his words. It had started making Gale’s chest flutter somewhere around the time of their first promotion.

And he’d desired that tone and the man it belonged too long before they were assigned to the 100th. Ignoring it hadn’t worked, so accepting it and letting it consume a part of him that would never be shared became the solution. 

It's why he broke it off with Marge before shipping out, though he didn’t tell John that. Didn’t tell anyone that. She still writes to him, still wants to be his friend, and it’s easy for the men to draw the conclusion that he is loyal to a sweetheart back home. 

The woman under John’s arm rolls her eyes and then forgets about Gale immediately. 

She’s laughing at all of his jokes. 

Even when John pulls out his best material, Gale makes sure to give him nothing more than a smile. He’s been unable to help himself and has allowed soft huffs of quiet laughter on occasions that are becoming less rare. But Gale has never given him a full bellied laugh. 

Maybe he should have. He knows it’s a goal of John’s, to make Gale smile, to make him laugh. 

She’s touching his chest, the side of neck. 

Gale allows himself to be touched by John. Not at first. Physical contact hadn’t been a part of his life in a positive way before he met John. It took a lot to get to the point where his best friend’s method of expressing friendship didn’t make him want to recoil, didn’t make him flinch. It took a lot, but it didn’t take a long time. By the third week in flight school, he was craving the soft touches and starting to hate himself a little for it. 

He hardly ever initiates the contact himself. He’ll give John’s shoulder a squeeze. Let his hand linger in his grasp for too long when they greet each other. 

Maybe things would be different if he let himself touch with the freedom in which John did. But affection was something he soaked up like a sponge when it was from John and wilted at when it was from others. And it was something he’d never learned how to give or take. Thinks maybe John could teach him but he knows he’ll never ask him to. 

But things wouldn’t be different. 

Because he watches John’s hand trail from her shoulder, down her back and to her hip, fingertips grazing the soft curve of her body on its way down. He watches John smile into her hair and whisper something into her ear again that makes her cheeks flush to match her lipstick and then nuzzle behind her ear. He looks away as John’s fingers trail the hem of her skirt. 

And he imagines doing that to Marge or the girl across the room and all it does is turn his stomach. 

So, nothing would be different if he were able to touch freely or laugh loudly. He’s different and John’s not, so he’ll settle it all back down in his chest and try to think about all of it less. 

But he doesn’t have to torture himself by watching where this night will lead his best friend, so he slides out of the booth and heads to the bar to pay. 

“What’s got you so glum, Buck?” Everett Blakely’s effusively kind voice sounds off as Gale pockets his change and he gives the other man a raised eyebrow. 

“Pretty sure this is just what my face looks like, Everett.” 

“Nah, sometimes you smirk a bit.” Everett grins at him. “Besides, it’s all in the eyes, and you’ve got sad eyes tonight, Major.”

“Think we’re all entitled to bad nights once in a while, given the circumstances.” Gale plucks a fresh toothpick from his pocket to replace the one he’d ruined, catches John leading the woman onto the dancefloor and can’t help but follow his movements with his eyes. 

He wishes he was normal enough that the lives of the twenty men they’d lost two days ago was what was twisting his insides. Instead, it’s watching his best friend do a perfectly normal thing - flirt and twirl a girl around. Both realities of his reasons for hurting live heavy in his chest, like they’re located in different chambers, blessing him with the opportunity to feel different types of agony instead of just your average layer of pain.  

“Gonna head out,” he says, nodding at Blakely, who lifts his glass in response. 

John is in rare form this evening, giving up on dancing quickly and already guiding the girl towards the back door without a glance in Gale’s direction. 

Because he’s normal. And normal men don’t think about their best friends when there’s a pretty girl hanging on their arm. 

Bucky probably expects Gale to be waiting for him when he’s finished. Waiting to walk back together at the end of the night. 

Or maybe he’s not thinking anything at all about Gale. 

He’s the first one back. He’s always the first one back. 

The shower room is vacant, and he takes his time, but he’s still alone when he makes his way back into the barracks. He’s still alone when he changes into his sleep clothes and lays in his cot. 

And he is still alone an hour later when sleep refuses to sink her claws into him and drag him to some kind of relief. 

Men slowly stumble in, and Gale closes his eyes, giving the illusion of slumber. He listens to the nightly routines of the men around him as they prepare for sleep, actions audibly clumsier than most nights in their inebriated states. 

But drunken movements disturbing a quiet room are something Gale’s been hearing since he was a boy, so he finds them familiar and ignores the way they make his stomach tighten unpleasantly in anticipation. 

More time paces, everyone settled into bed and Gale still can’t sleep.

Shuffling footsteps, intentionally quiet in their movements are the only thing that alerts him to John’s return. His cot is within arm’s reach of Gale’s own, but he’d thought it would remain empty tonight. The feeling of satisfaction that bubbles up in him is ugly and bitter, but he lets it boil under his skin as John returns to his side in the end. 

Heavy, scratchy wool glides up the length of his torso until it rests under his chin. Strong hands tuck it under his shoulder blades and his hips. He tries to keep his breathing deep, feigning the same familiar pattern of sleep he listens to from John’s bunk each night to lull himself to sleep. A moment later, calloused fingers brush the product-less bangs off his forehead and run through the length of his hair. 

The tender gesture almost forces his eyes open. That aching, craving hunger for more of what John will give him is a living thing in his chest. Those fingers ghost over his hair one more time and Gale uses every bit of strength in himself not to push up into the touch, not to whine when it’s gone.

He hears John let out a sigh that sounds mournful and he doesn’t understand what any of it means. 

As John moves, most likely to turn away, Gale can smell her perfume. 

If he opened his eyes he’d probably see her lipstick stained on his mouth, his neck. Knows with a gut-wrenching certainty that it’s probably stained in more intimate places, and he wishes John wasn’t too drunk to go take a shower. 

Wishes it wouldn’t linger on him. Wishes it wasn’t on him at all. Doesn’t want to see the red of her lips on John’s when the new day dawns. 

Imagines if it had been him under John’s arm leaving the pub, there wouldn’t even be a visible trace of him in the aftermath. 

He’d be forgettable, inconsequential. Easy to forget. Easy to regret. 

He keeps his eyes closed and wishes John hadn’t come back at all. Is so glad that he did. 

A softly whispered “goodnight, Buck.” is breathed into the stale air of the barracks, and Gale lays awake for a long time after John’s breathing evens out into sleep, wishing he could join him in more ways than one.

[lu-is-not-ok]

Everything you need to know from Leviathan

First things first: this is Not a story summary of Leviathan. This is merely a collection of all the pieces of characterization, backstory, and worldbuilding that I believe is or will be relevant in Limbus Company.

I encourage everyone who has finished Library of Ruina (or doesn't care about spoilers to that game) to read Leviathan yourselves, as I will be skipping over most of the actual plot of the novel.

Also, due to the nature of Leviathan as the direct sequel to Library of Ruina, some endgame spoilers to that game will inevitably come up. That being said, I will try my best to keep those spoilers as minimal and vague as possible.

Preamble: Done. Let's get into this. Something something long post warning ahead. It's also kind of chaotic and borderline incomprehensible. If I missed something then, uh, whoops.

Event Timeline:

The end of Library of Ruina directly causes an event dubbed "the first miracle" by some, and "the second passing of White Nights" by others, during which the people killed in the Library would begin returning to the City as if nothing happened.

An orphanage in the Backstreets of District 22 (V Corp's) was at the epicenter of this event, being destroyed in the process and causing the Ring to take interest in the children raised there.

The events of Leviathan follow half a year after this event, and seem to take place over the course of at least a few days. It's as of yet unclear how much time has passed between the end of Leviathan and the beginning of Limbus Company.

Vergilius:

Vergilius comes from District 22 (V Corp's), a Nest filled with wide water canals and boats that make use of them, making it somewhat reminiscent of Venice.

Vergilius used to be the operator of a highly-experienced and skilled Fixer Office. The lowest Grade Fixer at that Office is Grade 3 until a rookie joins them during the events of Leviathan. This Office seems to be dissolved by the end of Leviathan after half of the Fixers working for it die.

Vergilius's title, the Red Gaze, is a stealth pun in Korean. The word used for Gaze is a homophone to the characters used in an epiphet meaning Immortal Poet.

The red eyes Vergilius is named after appear to have a certain kind of aura to them, which causes him to draw attention to himself and be easily recognised. For missions where stealth is involved, Vergilius has a special pair of glasses to make his gaze less recognisable.

Also, Vergilius owns whole-ass calling cards with his Fixer title and a portrait in a Roman-inspired style.

As a Color Fixer, Vergilius is extremely strong and fast, being able to crack the ground underneath his feet when running at full sprint and literally cut through buildings. In fact, Vergilius's body is heavily augmented with artificially woven muscle fibers, which Vergilius compares to hydraullic cylinders and motors in how it feels to use them, though they're not literally mechanical. Despite that level of power, he's noticeably less experienced or skilled than another Color Fixer seen in Leviathan - Iori, the Purple Tear.

Speaking of her, Vergilius appears to know quite a bit about her, including her name, what happened to her in Library of Ruina, and what one of her goals is. She's also implied to have taught Vergilius a technique called Shin that gets introduced later in Leviathan. Also, Iori calls him a junior, implying a difference in either age or experience between the two. Oh, and he also knew Roland.

In addition to knowing those people, Vergilius appears to have also known Carmen before she died. He recognises the nickname Carmen uses for him within the Light as the one she used for him back when they knew each other. Also, back then, Vergilius's weren't as they are now, implying they've known each other before Vergilius was a Color Fixer.

For some time during his work as a Fixer, Vergilius has had the ability to sense "Flow". A fate-like pressure that he sees as trails of shadows and light, pointing him towards a destination he doesn't know. It's a force he notably struggles to resist, only being able to by following dim Flows, rather than the slow but bright Flow. However, doing so merely brings ruin to Vergilius's life, as the dim Flow inevitably guides him back to the slow Flow.

For ten years, Vergilius has been visitting an orphanage in the local Backstreets, donating money and goods and spending time with the children there. He even keeps an old photograph of him with all the orphanage's residents on him.

Before he found the orphanage for the first time however, Vergilius would go on rampages and kill people he believed were contributing to the horrible current state of the City. One of those rampages involved the slaughter of a whole Syndicate, the leader of which was Lapis's father. It's heavily implied that all the children within the orphanage landed there as a direct result of Vergilius's actions.

Vergilius is consistently shown to be stoic and emotionally distant, yet deeply caring underneath his aloof exterior. This is most clearly shown through his relationship with Garnet, the previously mentioned rookie who was raised at the previously mentioned orphanage. Though Vergilius denies Garnet's claims that he raised him, and regularly thinks about how Garnet's sentimentality is going to get him killed, yet he also can't help but feel proud of Garnet in moments where he truly shines, care a lot about Garnet's safety, and feel horrible guilt when he fails to protect him.

Back during his rampaging days, Vergilius is unable to show mercy, with his "attempt" to do so involving giving the last survivor a cut that would let them survive for a few hours, in gratitude for giving him a code to the door. Inversely, current day Vergilius appears to have softened, as his gladius has a heating mechanism that immediately cauterizes the wounds it inflicts. This ensures non-fatal wounds remain not fatal, even if leaving his target alive could cause him issues later on.

Vergilius's motives for taking care of the kids at the orphanage despite being the one who orphaned them are as complex as they are layered. Guilt is clearly a part of that, as Vergilius believes there's no reason for him to see Lapis again when Garnet offers to take him along for his meeting with her. Another part of it might have been Vergilius secretly wishing that one day, one of the kids would realize what he'd done and take their retribution... however it's unclear how "canon" that particular motivation is due to it only being brought up in a vision of a Mirror World. The orphanage was also a reprieve from his former reality filled with wails and begging for mercy. It was a place of warmth, filled with voices of delight waiting for him every time. At the same time, it was a source of hope for him. A place where he could redeem himself, to raise children who could live with the heart he couldn't have, and who could potentially change the City with their virtues alone. All of these motivated Vergilius to cover up and forget about his true goal. One he's been actively burrying during his visits at the orphanage.

That goal? Redacted from the viewer. The first explicitly set up mystery in Leviathan. However, we know that it is directly tied to how Vergilius wishes to change the City.

Vergilius believes that the City is deeply wounded, with its injuries having festered for a long time. He believes that the way to change it is to continue spilling blood, never letting it dry out. To try and pierce through the City's thick shell into its wounded core. When describing the world he wants, he says it's "a world that can only be understood once you feel it with your whole body".

After a talk with Carmen, Vergilius effloresces into his E.G.O, which allows him to wield blood as both a weapon and armor. It also allows him to become one with pools of blood, however he would be unable to leave them if they were to dry while he's inside. However, the usage of his E.G.O is limited by the amount of other people's blood he has available to him. If he were to run out, he'd be forced to use his own, dying painfully in the process.

Also, Vergilius keeps coming up with one-liners when beating people up. It's kinda funny.

At the end of Leviathan, Vergilius is invited into Limbus Company, being promised to give him Lapis (who had been replaced by Charon) and Garnet (who has been reduced to a tiny glowing jewel) back. Thinking back on his past, Vergilius accepts, though the story ends before we get to see the exact terms of his employment.

Charon:

Previously, Charon was known as Lapis, and was one of the kids at the orphanage Vergilius would regularly visit. She was especially close friends with Garnet, who would later become a Fixer and join Vergilius's Office. In fact, Garnet notes how Lapis wouldn't usually open up to anyone but him, and when they did talk she would often talk about Vergilius. She's also noted to not be a fan of studying.

Lapis ended up at the orphanage after Vergilius killed her father during his slaughter of the Syndicate he led. While we don't get to know much about her father, we do know he cared deeply for her, to the point his last words were calling out her name.

In a flashback to her childhood, we learn that Lapis would always suck on bitter candy as she's able to preserve it and suckle on it little by little, whereas sweet things melt away much sooner. She follows this anecdote of hers up by revealing her wish to "try all the flavors in the world" when she grows up.

After aging out of the orphanage, Lapis got a job at a fruit-harvesting company. During the events of Leviathan, Lapis has decided to meet up with Garnet at a private location. However, the area turned out be occupied by Syndicate members, including that of the Ring, and Lapis was kidnapped to be used in the Ring's experiments with Mirror World technology.

At the end of Leviathan, Lapis turned out to be the only of the "gems" to have survived the experiments. However, she did so because she was the only successful one. Her former identity was completely erased, replaced by that of Charon. Initially, Vergilius is hesitant to make contact with her, feeling like keeping his distant will save both of them from pain. However, he relents when Charon finds a still living piece of the jewel Garnet had turned into.

Gubo:

Gubo is one of the researchers at N Corp, and during the events of Leviathan he comes to an auction held by the Ring for the sole purpose of gaining access to their Corridor and retrieving Aseah.

His connections to a Wing allow him to casually bid 10 billion Ahn like it's nothing. Gubo is also notably frustrated when the auctioneer appears to be breaking their own rules, trying to convince them that doing so would put their gallery in ill repute.

To enter the Corridor despite his failure at the auction, Gubo is willing to sacrifice the lives of the people that had accompanied. Notably, Vergilius is able to tell that Gubo did no fighting himself due to his appearance, reckoning he merely hid while others fought in his stead.

Gubo is someone who's willing to keep himself calm and composed regardless of the situation. He's constantly calculating ways to reach his goal, willing to do anything and pay any price to do so. However, that composure is said to reflect insecurity, obsession, and yearning. He is shown to take some ridiculous risks in pursuit of his goals, attempting to attack Vergilius twice despite being clearly outmatched against a fucking Color.

Despite N Corp being at potential odds with the Ring, due to them kidnapping Aseah, Gubo doesn't act hostile towards the Ring's members outside of getting rid of those who were directly standing in his way.

Aseah:

During Leviathan, Aseah is the main researcher working on the Mirror World technology for the Ring. He's specifically working on modifying and tuning an invention made by Young-Ji, the Glass Window.

By that point in time, Aseah had already joined N Corp, however the Ring kidnapped him to use his knowledge for their own gain. Despite such seemingly dire circumstances, Aseah does not seem bothered to be working for the Ring in the slightest.

Aseah is a cold and usually emotionless individual who only cares about his research. In fact, he only ever shows emotions, specifically passion, when realizing he's made a breakthrough or describing how the technology he's researching works. He's easily swayed to risk other people's lives for the sake of pushing his research even further.

One of this main motives for using the Glass Window is to create a Singularity to surpass Yi Sang's creation, as well as any other competing technology of this kind. Despite his self-imposed rivalry with Yi Sang, Aseah still calls him a friend.

At the end of Leviathan, Aseah is successfully retrieved by Gubo . However, a question is posed: for both to get back out of the Corridor, Aseah must be able to know how to navigate it. If that's the case and he could have escaped this whole time, why didn't he? He must have had reasons to not fly away, even though his cage was wide open. Add that to the mystery counter.

Limbus Company:

Limbus Company shows up at the very end of Leviathan, being a new enough Company for Vergilius to have never heard of them before.

A Special Operations Team from a department called LCA raids the Ring's lab, specifically searching for Vergilius. A woman with hair that seems white from far away, but appears graysih close up, approaches him. This is revealed to be Faust, and she's the one who gives Vergilius an offer.

Work for Limbus Company, and we can bring Lapis and Garnet back.

The Ring:

The Ring are a Syndicate that are said to only believe what they see with their own eyes, and are dedicated to the creation and display of various types of art. They also hold auctions for various pieces.

Some of the Ring's art falls within our understanding of it, such as paintings and sculptures. A large amount of it however includes acts of extreme violence or otherwise cruel behavior.

Many of the lower-ranking members of the Ring and Backstreets residents under their protection are considered to be akin to students, being graded on their pieces and taking art exams. While the Ring does allow resits on their exams, flunking too many times will result in death. In such an environment, a lack of inspiration causes people to have mental breakdowns.

As far as we've seen, the Ring hold two different types of art galleries, which I'll refer to as Syndicate-facing and Public-facing respectively.

Syndicate-facing art galleries are structured more like schools, complete with classrooms and suspicious "art" exhibits within the halls. One of those exhibits we see are "statues" of people with animal heads. However, these statues are actually sill living people that are forced to stay completely still under the threat of violence, or "scolding". Oh, and those people also had their mouths and ears sewn shut. This particular exhibition is revealed to be a part of a test that the Ring was holding that night.

Public-facing art galleries look more akin to modern art galleries we'd see in our world, and their lower floors are accessible to pretty much any public person. These floors are filled with more standard types of art, like paintings and sculptures. The top floor of these galleries is considered the VIP floor, where auctions are held and the true disturbing nature of the Ring is shown to the guests there.

During the auctions, every participant has a veil put over their head, and they are to bow in respect when the one holding the auction enters the stage. The art pieces sold on these auctions can be anything from paintings of real slaughters that took place in the City, to objects made out of or containing pieces of actual people, to straight up dancers stuck eternally dancing in glass stages in which time flows slower. Additionally, the person who wins the bid on the "meister's most cherished work" will be allowed into the Ring's Corridor.

At the time of Leviathan's events, the Ring not only has access to the Corridor, but also Mirror World technology in the form of the Glass Window.

A secret research lab was kept hidden within one such Corridor, where the Ring would test Mirror World technology on "gems" - young people who came from the orphanage at the epicenter of the Miracle. These experiments involved these people experiencing many Mirror Worlds at once within their mind, with those people physically shattering if pushed too far.

The Ring's goal with their research of the Mirror Worlds is to open as many Rifts to as many of them as possible, with one of the high-ranking Ring members saying they wish to open ten thousand rifts at minimum.

This plan appears to be thwarted by the end of Leviathan. It's vaguely implied that N Corp and/or Limbus Company seized the tech in the Ring's possession, leaving it unclear if the Ring still has access to it currently.

Over the course of Leviathan, we learn of two different high positions within the Ring: Docents and Maestros. Each can be identified by the kind of ring they wear on their ring fingers. Also, all of the ones we've seen thus far are gender non-conforming as fuck.

Docents are responsible for taking care of and monitoring the art galleries. Notably, they are responsible for guiding guests and giving lectures on the lower floors of their public-facing galleries. These lectures appear to involve explaining the ideals of their Maestros. Docents wear two-coiled rings that extends down the top of their hands and coils around their wrists.

Maestros are responsible for holding the auctions and appear to have a high amount of control over the Ring's actions. They wear three-coiled rings. They also notably act a lot more according to what they believe is true art, as opposed to the Docents who can still be swayed by money and social standard. As an example, Maestro Jumsoon decides to give his most prized artpiece not to the person bidding billions of Ahn, but to the person who convinces him they can complete the piece due to being personally involved in what it represents.

N Corp:

The physical location of the Ring's secret lab appears to be within N Corp's District. However, due to its entry point being connected to the Corridor, it's unable to be accessed from outside the Corridor.

One of N Corp's main source of income and culture are so-called suicide vending machines, or vending machines that dispense canned experiences that specifically allow a person to experience suicide. This bit of technology is considered both amazing and condemnable, and is said to be one of the main reasons people move to N Corp's Nest.

N Corp Taboos are upheld vehemently. Recorded footage of that secret lab, even without knowing it's located in N Corp, would result in Taboo Hunters being sent out over the breaking of the Nest filming taboo. They are highly efficient, going after everyone who had seen the recording before finally retrieving the footage.

M Corp:

M Corp's full name is MDM Enterprise. In Leviathan, we see M Corp do business with the Ring through delivering their product to them - an entire moonlight stone.

A moonlight stone delivered in a massive box filled with a flesh-like cushion around the stone. Opening the box requires using an unlocking mechanism composed of multiple various levers. Everyone present in the same room as the box during its opening are required to wear ear plugs, while those actually opening it also require airway protection. Upon being pulled open, the stone needs to be cut out of the flesh cushion using a knife.

If sufficient ear protection is not worn during this process, the sound the stone emits while being forced out of its container will cause all that hear it to experience a "wave of hiraeth". This is shown as a sort of dissociative state where the person rambles about the ocean being their home and family, and how they need to return to it.

The moonlight stones themselves appear similar in shape to large pearls. The Ring appears to use them by putting them in translucent containers, where the stone is attached to multiple electrodes and tubes for a yet unclear purpose.

The Light:

After the second passing of White Nights, people would begin transforming into forms similar to cocoons or eggs. This happens when a person becomes aware of how unbearable the world around them is, causing them to retreat from reality.

When seperated from their bodies, people establish their... Redacted. Yet another mystery. However, it's implied to be something along the lines of the ideal world they wish to create, or the dream they wish to make true. If they manage to set this Redacted and endure the process, they can be born anew as a Distortion (or potentially with Effloresced E.G.O). If they can't their bodies are seized by their sins, resulting in the creation of a Peccatulum.

This process is pointed out as being different to the process of Distorting that we're used to seeing, though it's not yet unclear to what extent.

The inside of the Light as utter stillness, shimmering as if somethered in light. When someone is inside the Light, Carmen attempts to guide them towards a specific conclusion, acting kind and trying to absolve them of any guilt over their actions, while showing an utter lack of pity or genuine feeling. She's able to see past the facades people put up, directly looking into what they have been through. She uses that knowledge to direct people towards realizing their true desires and wishes.

Carmen is able to meet and talk with people whose hearts "crack". Who are too overwhelmed with their emotions in the moment. When she discovers a person's true wish has been buried and hidden away, she acts as if the act is so painful that it hurts her by proxy. She uses this opportunity to offer these people the power to create they consider right, one only for their own eyes.

She claims that she's helping everyone paint the City with their own colors, much like the Light, in which all colors perfectly blend together. When it's pointed out to her that doing so would be impossible, due to everyone's colors being different and thus it being impossible for them all to exist together in perfect harmony, Carmen responds by saying everyone should be dedicated to protecting and fighting for the sake of their own world, even if it means fighting the entire world itself.

Carmen describes the process of Distorting or Efflorescing E.G.O as becoming a "self unbound by the eyes and standards of the City", with Carmen attributing the latter to being Ayin's idea. Carmen says that she believes the final destination of everyone's ambitions is Love, specifically unconditional Love towards oneself, as the only person that can truly understand and love them is themself. This is where Carmen and Ayin come into conflict. Ayin believes people should be able fight using clothes and tools, holding the human form in high regard. Carmen, on the other hand, sees that as unnecessary moderation, and argues one should express their love through their body, so that it and their heart can become one.

Effectively, Carmen is trying to guide people to only caring about themselves and their desires, disregarding everything around them. She does so through a "friendly, yet ruthless pressure", by offering the seemingly perfect solution of absolute self-love at the cost of being blind to one's reality. She knows what the "right" choice is, and will be disappointed if one were to choose the other option, but she won't stop anyone from pursuing their desires even if their way is different from what she's envisioned.

...There is a purpose to it all. A goal Carmen has for herself. After all, she's a person too. It's another bit of information that's redacted, setting it up as yet another mystery, but we do have a hint towards what it could be. Somehow, a person who was given power by Carmen failing to fight for their wish appears to contribute towards Carmen's personal purpose.

Speaking of that, Leviathan reveals another, more violent way to defeat a Distortion. By proving the fundamentals of a Distortion's beliefs wrong, by breaking the foundation upon which their wish was built, the Distortion begins to fall apart. With nothing left to its form but vague concepts, an Abnormality is born, tearing out of the Distorted person's body and killing them instantly.

Peccatulae:

The Peccatulae are the result of the process enabled by the second passing of White Nights, in which a person retreats into a cocoon-like form upon finding the world too unbearable and faces an ordeal within. If the person fails the ordeal by not being able to find a wish for which's sake to return to their world, their body is left to be fed on by their sins. This results in their bodies transforming into manifestations of those sins - the Peccatulae. Once this transformation takes place, it cannot be reversed.

Peccatulae are not Distortions, as they are what happens when one lacks the strong desire needed to either Distort or Effloresce E.G.O. They are also not Abnormalities, as unlike them the Peccatulae can be killed.

The Peccatulae visually lack any humanity they may have had before the transformation. At the same time though, the cries they let out are compared to that of humans burdened by life, by the sin of bearing sin.

Those cries are also seemingly able to affect one's mind, causing memories associated with the Peccatulum's Sin Affinity to resurface.

The Glass Window:

The Glass Window is a piece of technology created by Young-Ji, which was co-opted by Aseah and studied by the Ring. This technology is considered to be a Singularity by Wings and Grade 1 Fixers.

The main function of the Glass Window is superimposing Mirror Worlds onto whatever is viewed through it, though in a blurry state. It's noted to be less stable than Yi Sang's Mirror technology, but in exchange it's capable of superimposing a much larger number of Worls at the same time.

The amount of Mirror Worlds and their intensity can be controlled through modifying the Glass Window's Refraction Rate. A higher Refraction Rate allows more overlayed Worlds to stack, at the cost of "yielding more of one's heart to the Glass Window".

Surviving high Refraction Rates without physically shattering involves attaining focus - a process involving perishing one's heart without killing it.

Most weapons cannot damage the Glass Window.

The Corridor:

The Corridor is a piece of technology that the Ring owns during the events of Leviathan. It's a liminal, seemingly-infinite space that can connect to places all over the City. As long as the area they wish to link has an exit, a matching entrance will appear within the Corridor.

Many of the doors within the Corridor are locked using mental locks, to be able to enter them one needs to think specific mental keywords as they attempt to open the door.

Inside the Corridor itself, electronics such as video recorders and ear pieces appear to malfunction.

Despite the Corridor being a mostly linear space, the complex and intricate rules by which its passages connect make it more than possible to get lost within. As such, navigating the Corridor is usually done when accompanied by a guide.

To navigate the Corridor by oneself, one needs to always remember two things - their starting point, and their destination. Knowing those two points will allow one to be able to find their way by feeling which directions to take. This is due to a phenomenon called Reversion of Causality, a phenomenon which some Singularities take advantage of as well.

Breaking through a wall in the Corridor leads to a massive hall made of constantly shifting purposeless surfaces lined within even more purposeless doors. Staying within this outer hall is dangerous, as one would become stuck here if the doors within the Corridor reassembled themselves.

Shin and Mang:

Shin is a technique Vergilius learned from (who's implied to be) the Purple Tear. Shin involves completely relinquishing the control of one's body to one's mind, specifically one's memories and the feelings associated with them. When Shin is used, it causes glowing rings to appear around the weapon (or body part if weaponless) one is using to fight. The glow of these rings is constantly emphasized to be that of the moon.

Vergilius describes Shin as "the power of Light", and "the power of sin".

To use Shin, one needs Mang (referred to as luna/lunae when not a proper noun), often multiple of them. Using Mang is described as filling onces emptied minds with dense and heavy memories, then letting the lunae of these recalled feelings guide one's movements.

Random Miscellanous Bits of Info:

It's a tradition in District 8 (H Corp's) to gift apples on Christmas Eve, to wish the giftee a peaceful night.

Cellphones in the City seem to be at a stage in-between Iphones and slightly older smartphones. The screen only takes up roughly half of the phone, but it appears to be a touchscreen due to the lack of mechanical buttons.

Related to that, payphones also exist in the City. The District the payphone is in gets shown to the one recieving a call from one.

The Seven Association holds seminars for new and aspiring Fixers that teaches them the basics, such as information about major Syndicates, Singularities, spatial awareness, etc. The Seven Association also holds Fixer qualification tests.

Higher education is something one can pursue in the City.

There are still video recorders that use videotapes in the City.

Cognition-warping ID Cards are a thing within the City. However, they are noted to only be useful for brief deception.

One of the canonical Mirror Worlds is literally our world.

Airplanes don't exist in the City.

[shadowgast-recs-weekly]

PWP Recs

Sometimes you just want to get to the point. Twenty-four recs under the cut - comment and kudos if you like them!

Spell Slut by First_Mate (10627, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: fisting :)

Series of one-shots: Essek takes his due payments from Caleb for the favours he did for the Might Nein and uses the opportunity to run some experiments.

Reccer says: If you like your Essek woobification-free, and especially if you like possessek (possessive Essek), this is a real treat!

Caught In Your Undertow by MoonwalkingCrab (13647, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Set in a vague alternate timeline after episode 107, Caleb is lost in his thoughts on a quiet evening when Essek comes to visit.

Reccer says: Is there anything better than porn with feelings? Because it is very porn and there are many feelings.

A Favor In Kind by literalfuckinggarbage (4208, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Yussa spends an evening in Widogast's Nascent Nein Sided Tower alongside Essek, and they discuss with Caleb the repayment of favors.

Reccer says: Caleb deserves to get got by two powerful elven mages at one time! Representation of a trans man who’s had the full package done

Somewhere Only We Know by DotyTakeThisDown (3803, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Caleb and Essek, now married, meet in a demiplane created just for them.

Reccer says: It’s sweet, hot, and optimistic, just lovely really!

a hearth to your hold by renquise (5538, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Essek had been gone a while. The two are happy to be reunited and have sex about it.

Reccer says: It has so many feelings packed in to wonderful porn! So tender! and A+ use of mage hand, of course

put your sweet lips on my lips by LadyOrpheus (15750, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: Omegaverse

Heat fic without the alpha/omega aspect, just good old drow biology

Reccer says: Very interesting take on heat fic. Also extremely sexy.

where's the point in hurrying (when waiting feels so great) by mllekurtz (4438, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

"You weren’t paying attention." That was Essek’s justification, delivered in a perfectly even and reasonable tone, when he entered Caleb’s study for the second time that evening, wearing nothing but jewellery.

Reccer says: Love love love their whole dynamic! They feel so in character and are very sexy about it.

warm inside (with) you by flammablehat (2023, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: Dubcon/Consensual Non Consent

Essek is sleepy. Caleb is horny

Reccer says: Both soft and sexy! Its obvious they care for eachother and sleepy sex is a fav of mine.

a question of luck by renquise (4847, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

After a night out, Caleb is desperate to express just how much he's attracted to Essek

Reccer says: Another sexy one! Love how pieces of their relationship are shown, along with their care for eachother.

Genre Studies by AnaliseGrey (3959, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

“I suppose you're going to tell me this isn't what it looks like?” “Nein, it is exactly what it looks like.” and what it looks like is tentacles.

Reccer says: Love Caleb being 100% down to explore Essek's kinks!

The Climax by Checkhov (4640, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

After their climb up an anti-magic tower and their endless teasing, the wizards decide to take a long rest in the stairwell. Essek endeavours to make this a peaceful night and fails spectacularly.

Reccer says: I couldn’t have asked for a better endcap for this series! From mutual pining to mutual masturbation, chef’s kiss

Mitosis by queenbeetle (4325, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: Choose Not to Warn

Similacrum enables many Calebs to play with a single Essek

Reccer says: Scorching hot! Overwhelmed Essek is always wonderful.

Struggle by measuringtheabyss (2880, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Essek ties Caleb up, edges him, then forces him to come three times in rapid succession until he's screaming and crying. Caleb has a *great* time.

Reccer says: Short and sweet. If you're a fan of forced orgasms and/or overstimulation, then this fic is for you.

shrimp vision by Nevenne (3202, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

In earlier editions of D&D, instead of darkvision, drow had infrared vision, meaning they could see heat. This is about what might happen between Caleb and Essek if the latter could see the former’s, um, warm spots.

Reccer says: Xenobiology, Caleb is a horny little shit, Essek is very done, and Caleb bottoms. What more could you ask for?

i’m the powder, you’re the fuse (just add some friction) by bloodredribbon (7747, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Essek is prim and proper and neat as a pin. Caleb is a messy gremlin and a brat, and it’s kinda turning Essek on.

Reccer says: I love it when Bratleb fucks around and finds out! Frankly, so do Caleb and Essek both. Excellent magical bondage and brat taming here.

something beautiful, a contradiction by bloodredribbon (2514, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Caleb is really into Essek's makeup.

Reccer says: I liked it!

Caleb Kind Of Fucks Up by im_sorry_dont_judge_me (9213, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Caleb misses Essek. Essek calls and has terrible (or maybe great) timing.

Reccer says: I really love accidental voyeurism PWP and this has got to be my favorite of the trope!

Artificer Devices from Late-Period Aeor: An Experimental Interpretation from Arcane Reconstruction to Functionality (E. Thelyss, C. Widogast) by renquise (5858, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Caleb replicates an Aeorian fuch-machine for Essek

Reccer says: Super hot, and their care for each other is obvious.

Sweet Desecration by witches_chant (3061, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Essek ties Caleb up and challenges him to be good to get his reward.

Reccer says: It's so well written, it feels poetic.

open up the deepness (Essek on the beach) by lakrisrot (10599, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Essek enjoys a bunch of beach days and gets very horny about it.

Reccer says: This is one of my absolute favorites, it's so beautifully written, the characterization is on point and it's a lot of fun - even on the 10th re-read.

for you it could be anything by nox_nocturnal (1614, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Caleb is too attracted to his partner for them to even make it out of the kitchen

Reccer says: They're so in love! The characterization is wonderful, as is the sex

Soup Powered Fuck Machine by VexedVixen (4388, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Caleb makes Essek his favorite soup. Essek rewards him.

Reccer says: Dirty talk and praise kink, yes please! Does the meme justice lol

Hold Fast by Anonymous (3059, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: Bondage, Spanking

Caleb endures the best, worst predicament bondage, while trying to be quiet.

Reccer says: The word "hot" doesn't do this fic justice but it is indeed smoking hot.

i still worship the flame by dreadelion (4820, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Essek experiments with shibari on caleb.

Reccer says: Wonderful fic inspired by wonderful art.

Aeor is for Lovers is an 18+ Shadowgast Discord server. The above fanfic recommendations were pulled from our community for this weekly event. All fics, unless otherwise specified, will primarily feature Shadowgast. Have any questions about what this is? Check out the FAQ! Next week, we’ll be back with Lifespan Angst Solutions!

[sevensoulmates]

7x05 Buddie Meta YDKM Part 2 (of 4)

Part 1. Part 3. Part 4

I just want to make an aside and say that I'm really happy they didn't go the route of having Maddie just "know" about Buck's queerness. As much as it's a funny headcanon, in real life "the glass closet" reaction from other people can feel invalidating, and Buck obviously reacts defensively when Maddie says "Wow", wanting to know immediately why she would say that. Also, just because Maddie is his big sister doesn't mean she automatically knows everything about Buck. I'm glad that both she and Eddie reacted with some surprise but mostly just acceptance.

I like that they're making it a point to show that even though it feels like Buck liking men is coming out of nowhere, it's really not. He's felt feelings for men and sexual attraction to men in the past, he just thought it was all normal. This also reminds me of his relationship with Eddie (and not just because Buck admitted to being an ass man and we all know who has the best ass on the show) because he views the relationship he was with Eddie to be "normal" best friends when it's really not true. There's a lot of nebulousness there but then in the scenes where it very much stands out that this is not typical male best friendship. But Buck just didn't realize it, and my guess is Eddie doesn't realize this either.

Very brief aside, but my roommate thought this line was interesting because apparently "clefts" in men are supposed to be generally perceived as "super manly" or known for being something The Manliest of Men have (think Clark Kent/Superman) and I just find it interesting that Buck's attracted to something that's very stereotypically masculine. Once again proving that he's attracted to the male form, not just personalities or such.

Qualifying Tommy as "Eddie's friend" here is fascinating because I really think Maddie was flashing back to the last episode when Buck was in her kitchen complaining about Tommy and Eddie, and Maddie had justified it as Buck being "friend jealous" only for Buck to turn around and date Tommy all of a sudden. I think a lot of things are slotting into place for her now, and I think a lot of her "wow" comment was also her thinking about the implications of this too.

Hence why this next line feels pointed. It's very straightforward, practically bashing us over the head at this point. Buck's not sure of his own feelings yet. I don't think this is meant to say he's unsure of being bisexual or attracted to men, but that's he unsure of what he's feeling in regards to who the object of his affection is at the moment.

"If there's something you need to tell Eddie, you will. In your own time."

Are you kidding me? Could you BE any more blatant? It's not "you'll come out to Eddie when you're ready." or "you'll tell Eddie about Tommy when you're ready". It's a purposely vague line because Buck doesn't know what his feelings are just yet, but those of us who have been paying attention know. What he has to tell Eddie goes far beyond just his newfound bisexuality. And once Buck figures out what his feelings are, that's when he'll tell Eddie that "something". And it's not gonna happen on anyone's timeline but Buck's. This line really leads me to believe that Buck is a strong contender to figure out his feelings by the end of the season and may end up being the first person to admit their feelings (possibly later on in season 8).

Trigger warning for Eddie/Marisol post-sex scene:

Firstly I want to draw several comparisons to Eddie's previous scenes with his love interests. The first is that this wide shot of the setting before panning to them in bed reminded me of the scene in 4x08 Breaking Point where Eddie is on his date with Ana and we hear grunting/moaning sounds, but it's a fake-out to them just sitting on the couch learning math. This time, it's not a fake-out, they really were having sex in this scene. The second parallel is the fact that Eddie and Marisol are lying together upside down on the bed. In my opinion, this is a blatant call-back to Shannon and their sex scene in 2x10 Merry Ex-Mas. Which to me signals a couple of things. 1.) That Eddie is very obviously trying to force Marisol to be a replacement for Shannon and 2.) He's doing the same thing with Marisol that he did with Shannon and using sex as a distancing method.

I know that sounds contradictory. Why would he ask her to move in if he's been trying to distance himself from her? Bear with me and I'll explain in a minute.

We know that Eddie doesn't know Marisol all that well, as proven by this episode. So what were they doing all of this time when they've been dating for months? Just not talking? Nope. Apparently, they've been having sex. So much sex apparently that they haven't been able to have any "get to know you" conversations.

With Shannon, the two of them had sex because it was easier than actually trying to talk to each other. Because when they would talk, it would always devolve into screaming fights. If Eddie is subconsciously trying to make his relationship with Marisol into the one like with Shannon, that may be an explanation as to why he's been so hesitant to actually get to know her at all. I'll come back to this more later.

Now I'm curious if anyone else picked up on this line because it felt like a clear parallel to season 5, but not to Eddie's last relationship. Instead, it felt like a parallel to BuckTaylor shortly after she moved in 5x13 Fear-O-Phobia. Not only is BuckTaylor paralleled because Buck also asked Taylor to move in on a whim in order to save a failing relationship, but it's also where Taylor decided her couch (any couch theory truthers out there?) was better than Buck's couch and therefore he would have to get rid of his in order to make room for hers. To me, that showed Taylor's clear inability to make any compromises with Buck, and anywhere she lived would always be her place, and not theirs. This parallel is interesting because it just makes me think that it's foreshadowing more incompatibility for Eddie and Marisol in the future. With Marisol "invading Eddie's home", the more of her that is moved in, the more of himself he has to get rid of, shut down, or deny. That's not to say Marisol is on the same level as Taylor Kelly, oh no, but it might just show that this relationship Eddie has with Marisol might just be as unhealthy for him, as Buck's relationship with Taylor was for him.

I also find it interesting how Eddie starts to make what he's learned sexual. He's not talking about your general "slapping of the hands or arms with a ruler", spanking very much has one definition, though it can be used in both PG and sexual situations. Spanking of a child's bottom is used as punishment, often to cause shame, in order for the child to not do certain things again. (This might be a controversial take but) spanking a child is physical abuse, and often has psychological repercussions on a child as they grow up. Eddie here seems to be insinuating that he was put through something similar when he was young. But then he also conflates it with the sexual form of spanking which should normally be fine between consenting partners. To me, I think Eddie is now subconsciously mentally connecting shame, punishment, and the conditioned urge to Never Do It Again or suffer the consequences with having sex with Marisol. The question then begs, what is Eddie so ashamed of and what are the consequences he's so afraid of?

I find it very curious that rather than Eddie being concerned that Marisol is too religious for him, or that they might have differing lifestyles that may not be compatible, he worries how this will affect their sex life. In my opinion, it's because on some level he's aware if he can no longer have sex with Marisol, what else are they supposed to do with the time they spend together? Do they have anything in common? Do they share any hobbies? It's especially interesting juxtaposing 7x04 where Eddie was having a BLAST going on dates outings with Tommy, and they had so much in common and Eddie was just asking Marisol to babysit multiple times a week. So with the little time he has been spending with Marisol recently, all they've been doing is fucking.

It's the same pattern of distancing he did with Shannon. She got pregnant, they got married, Eddie immediately enlisted and preceded to spend most of the following 4-6 years away from Shannon, only seeing her for short periods at a time where they spent most of the time they did see each other fighting. When he was back, Eddie was emotionally distant, which was a large part of the reason Shannon left in the first place. And when she came back, and he didn't have any other ways to distance himself? He used sex instead, and only really got it into his head that he wanted to get back with her when she had her pregnancy scare.

That's not to say there weren't good moments, or that Eddie didn't love her. But I do think a large part of the reason Eddie looks back on that time and romanticizes it is because he enjoyed the concept of being married to her and the safety net that provided him. Their marriage/feelings for each other were nuanced, but it can't be denied that from what we've seen on screen (which is all we can really call canon) it seems like a large part of their marriage was spent in (mutual) deep dysfunction.

So now that he doesn't have sex as a way to distance himself from Marisol what does he do? Avoids her physically as much as he can.

Additionally, I would like to touch on something known as the Madonna-Whore Complex:

After we see Marisol in her nun attire, the next time Eddie sees her, he sees her as the Virgin Mary, mother of Christ, aka, the ultimate Mother Figure in catholicism. One could argue that Eddie's turned off because she reminds him of old teachers who apparently used to physically hit him and probably weren't very open to certain things that they would classify as "sin" or "ungodly".

Towards the end of their relationship, Eddie very much only saw Shannon as Christopher's mother, enough so that Shannon even questioned if he wanted her for her. Now he seems to be going through a similar problem, but instead of Marisol being the literal mother of his child, he's seeing her as this Mother figure and therefore unfuckable, hence his struggles to feel arousal about her after this. But as we're shown later as proven by Bobby, it does feel as if Eddie is using the whole Catholicism thing as an excuse to distance himself from Marisol.

So what's the truth of this? The Madonna-Whore complex is rooted in misogyny and patriarchy, but where do queer or repressed queer men fall into this category? That might be a little above my pay grade to answer, but it is still something interesting to think about.

This was very telling as well. "To avoid not having sex" essentially means he was purposefully avoiding having to talk with Marisol in order to turn her down for sex. Idk, but if you're in a good enough partnership where you're at the point of asking them to move in, it's usually assumed that you at least know how to communicate to your partner that you don't want sex. Why is Eddie afraid to tell Marisol that he doesn't want to have sex with her? It makes sense if ALL they've been doing most of the time they spend together is having sex. If he has to tell Marisol no to sex, what are they going to do then? Talk? Actually get to know each other? God forbid.

This starts the series of scenes in this episode where Eddie does everything in his power to avoid having a conversation with Marisol because now his sex-crutch is no longer there to distract the both of them.

I'll admit I didn't know what the "Manchurian catholic" and "sea monkeys" dialogue lines meant but I've since done some research and I get it now. "Manchurian Catholic" is a reference to the movie "Manchurian Candidate" which is basically about a man who has was brainwashed into being an assassin, highlighting the psychological effects of suppressed memories and trauma. Sea monkeys were a children's thing where you had like shriveled shrimp where if you add water, they blow up in size. Basically, there are three lines all pointing to the same thing: Eddie's sitting on a well of repressed feelings (that are attached to shame) that may have been conditioned "out" of him over time.

This is what is known as Catholic Guilt. The question then becomes: What does Eddie feel guilty for? What "sin" has Eddie committed that is making him feel so guilty? Having sexual relations with a woman who was an almost-nun? Having pre-marital relations? Could be on the surface.

The show is acknowledging that Eddie is far more repressed than he even realizes. I feel like these lines are inviting the audience to think deeper: what is Eddie repressing here? Is it really just that he doesn't want to have sex with Marisol because God is watching and judging him for pre-marital sex or sleeping with one of his exes (thank you Bobby for that amazing line)? Or is it something different?

Marisol never actually got far enough to be a full-blown nun. She made the choice not to continue with it, but Eddie still has a problem with it. The main part of the problem, in his own words, is that he can't get aroused when he looks at her anymore. Not only that but he's been unable to even masturbate because the thought of her turns him off that much. Like my dude, there's no rule that says you have to imagine your girlfriend while jacking off. A lot of people, even people in loving committed relationships, have sexual fantasies that don't necessarily involve their partner and it doesn't necessarily make them a horrible person. I think it's interesting that even in his sexual fantasies Eddie's so strict about being "loyal" to his partner, that he can't even allow himself to imagine anything else other than her when getting off. But now, he can't because the nun things turns him off that much.

I can't help but wonder, is it really the nun thing, Eddie? Or is it that Marisol's strong connection to catholicism reminds you of times when you were forced to push down parts of yourself that were only starting to blossom in order to conform to what your religion and your family expected of you. Is it that the nun thing turns you off so much that you can't get hard? Or is it because now that you've been reminded of how you suppressed your feelings growing up, the reservoir of feelings has bursted and you're being reminded that women....just don't do it for you in general. But to think about men is to invite shame, punishment, guilt, and pain, and to be avoided at all costs.

Maybe it's easier to pretend it's the nun thing and not a women thing.

On a slightly more humorous note:

Buck's "I wish I could help you with that" line is VERY interesting. Freudian slip, mayhaps? Do you wish you could help Eddie get off, Buck? DO YOU? ;)

Other than that, I also wanted to point out that this scene in the gym is a parallel to 5x02, when Buck and Eddie last sat in these exact spots and Buck did the exact same thing and gave Eddie good advice about how to handle his last girlfriend Ana, basically telling Eddie to stop stringing Ana along. I find it interesting we're getting callbacks to Eddie's last break up because last time he also decided he was just going to stick it out and it was only Buck giving him some perspective that allowed him to finally make the decision to break up with her in the following episode.

But this time, Buck isn't able to fully tell Eddie all that he wants to say, which is the truth about himself. He gives him advice to talk to Bobby. And Bobby's conversation with Eddie is the LOUDEST in the entire episode.

This scene is incredibly revealing because it shows that Eddie isn't even really sure if it is his feelings regarding Catholicism that are triggering this reaction in him. Bobby rightly points out that the effects of being raised Catholic don't just go away once you leave the faith. They can have lasting and lingering consequences, some that people might not even realize until later in life.

Bobby very blatantly tells Eddie that this adverse reaction he's having to Marisol's past as an almost-nun is likely a reaction similar to his panic attacks that he had about Ana when things were moving too fast with her back in season 5. Bobby says Eddie never talks about her, not in any way that makes it seem like he was so serious about her as to ask her to move in. This comes out of nowhere for Bobby (and the rest of the characters) just as it does for the audience. This is to show us that what Eddie is doing IS out of nowhere and is a decision that should be questioned not just by the audience but by Eddie as well.

The fact that Bobby is comparing this reaction to how he acted with Ana really does harken back to the "repression" storyline of season 5. Eddie's subconscious is trying to tell him something, but he's ignoring it (as he always does) and is instead doing the exact opposite of what he should do and doubles down on Marisol.

And Eddie, as always, gets the exact opposite message of what Bobby's trying to tell him. Because Eddie's not a commitment-phobe. He commits too much, too fast, almost as if he cares more about getting to the "committed" part of the relationship, and doesn't care enough to actually build an actual bond with the women he's with. And Bobby gets to the heart of it by name-dropping Shannon. Because the crux of his commitment issues started with her. When he felt so guilty for getting her pregnant and then later for abandoning her for the military, that he basically vowed to stay committed to her for the rest of time, in life and in death. She's been dead for five years at this point, and Eddie is still hung up on his guilt over her. And no, I will not say he's hung up on her or his romantic love for her because that's not true as proven by his next line.

All I have to say is THANK GOD. Thank GOD the show is finally acknowledging that Shannon and Eddie did not get married because they really wanted to, or because they just loved each other so much. They got married because they got pregnant and were pressured into getting married by their catholic community and families. The show is finally starting to deconstruct Eddie's marriage and his romanticizing it over the years.

This line blew me away. Because he doesn't say "I loved her" or "I loved being with her." He loved being married. He liked being committed. He liked the knowledge that he had what was expected of him, a wife and a child. He liked being settled, knowing that he wouldn't ever have to go back out and make himself vulnerable to find another partner. He would never have to crack himself open so far to be truly known and get hurt. They could both hurt each other so deeply and it wouldn't matter because Eddie at least did his duty. He married her, made an honest woman out of her in the eyes of the church and their families, and provided monetarily for her. But he never gave her him, not fully, and that comes straight out of the mouth of Shannon Diaz herself.

What Eddie is seeking from Marisol is not a partnership, it's not a genuine connection with an individual. Because to create those kinds of relationships requires exposing yourself and letting in the possibility of being judged, of being hurt, of losing them. And Eddie doesn't want to be so invested in a person like that ever again. He already experienced that kind of loss with Shannon, and even they didn't have that kind of deep soul connection. I wonder if Eddie's afraid that he wouldn't survive that kind of loss if it was actually a partner he really deeply and unconditionally loved. It might destroy him, and that scares him.

So instead, Eddie would rather just skip forward to committed, to moved in, to married, to settled, and just stick it out when he has panic attacks, when he feels like he's sleeping next to a stranger, when sex is as deep of a connection he can ever get with a woman.

But when his body fights back, in various ways, in panic attacks, in sexual dysfunction, he doesn't listen to it. He ignores the signs.

Go to part 3!

Part 1, Part 3, Part 4

[the-whispers-of-death]

Team Bonding Exercise #1: Trust Falls

Before reading further, if you're a minor or an ageless blog, please don't interact with this post and blog!!!

***If you haven't read anything involving Stone or The Lions/this is the first time you're seeing a post of mine, here is Stone's masterlist and The Lions masterlist. There's also Ladder's masterlist, but besides the basic info post, everything else in her masterlist can be found in Stone's.***

A/N: Okay, so this has been a very long time coming, lol. Took me a long time to get to writing this, but I'm finally motivated to do so. Sorry it took me so long, but I hope you still enjoy it.

@jupiter-reimagined there's a small treat for you, if you can find it. :)

It's important to note that this still follows the "two months until the mission" timeline, so while it has been more than two months since the reunion for us, that's not the case in the universe. Just a little clarification for y'all.

Stone was too busy staring at Kali to realize the others were walking into the training room, everyone having been called there by Price and Kali. He still couldn't believe he's in Kali's presence again after a year of not seeing the man at all. He found himself yearning for the man to take off his mask and neck gaiter so he could see Kali's face again.

He snapped back to reality when everyone else was inside, Soap on one side of him while Ghost was on the other side of him. Everyone was waiting with abated breath to hear what the two captains had to say.

"So, as everyone knows, we have two months until the upcoming mission and it's imperative we trust each other since our squads are going to be split up," Price said, eyeing everyone in front of him. "And one of the first bonding exercises that we're going to do is trust falls."

That made everyone except Stone, Ghost, and Sarabi to groan. Stone's lips twitching beneath his muzzle-like mask to keep from smiling when he heard Simba grumble about how juvenile that exercise seemed.

Kali rolled his eyes, whistling to get everyone's attention. "I know, trust falls are so annoying. But it works, I promise." His eyes went to Stone briefly before looking at the rest. "It'll be simple, first we'll start with doing the trust falls with people in our own squad as a warm up and then work our way into doing trust falls with people of the other squad. So pair up, go on."

Stone got paired up with Ghost first, Ghost being the one to fall. He vaguely heard Soap promise not to move out of the way when Gaz fell.

"You okay?" he asked, noting how tense Ghost was. He had his arms out, waiting to catch Ghost. He couldn't help but try and soothe the other man. "Don't worry, you've seen my fast reflexes. And I can definitely lift more than you weigh."

Ghost let out a soft snort at that, nodding his head as his nerves were eased. "Now you're just making me worry for when I have to catch you," he replied before closing his eyes and falling backwards.

Stone didn't hesitate to catch Ghost, feeling the shorter man's weight settle nicely in his arms. "See? I have you," he murmured, watching Ghost open his eyes once he realized Stone did in fact catch him.

"Shut up," Ghost grumbled before getting up and switching spots with Stone so he was behind Stone now. "Okay, big guy. Time for you to trust me."

It was harder than Stone thought, since he knew he was heavier than everyone else. Still, he ignored his father's old words of not trusting anyone and fell backwards. Relief washed over him when Ghost caught him (albeit he struggled a bit to keep from falling with the weight), a warm fuzzy feeling spreading through his chest when his trust in Ghost was affirmed.

Meanwhile, Kali was having fun catching and falling during this exercise.

He trusted people easily, maybe a little too easily, but he knew to trust his gut. So even when they all eventually finished doing trust falls with their own squad and switched to doing them with the other squad, he had no problem falling backwards and letting the 141 members catch him.

He was steadily getting closer and closer to where Stone was, aching to have Stone in his arms, even if it was for a trust fall. They already trusted each other, but they still had to do the trust fall, for the exercise.

"Okay, Stone. I'll fall first, okay?" Kali asked, getting in front of the man.

It was so easy for him to be able to turn his back on Stone, a smile coming across his masked face when he heard Stone's response a grunt. Oh, how he missed hearing Stone's grunts.

Each one was unique despite them not sounding different at first and if you spent enough time with the man, you'd eventually figure out what grunt meant what.

Kali took a deep breath before falling backwards. It was like second nature to him despite him never having fallen into Stone's arms before, he just fell and knew Stone's burly arms would wrap around him. And Stone did wrap his arms around Kali, catching him with ease.

He stared up at Stone, grinning beneath his mask as he stared into those enchanting brown eyes. The light hit the brown in a way that made his eyes look like honey.

"I knew you would catch me."

"I almost didn't, just for fun."

Kali gasped at Stone's confession, standing upright and placing a hand on his chest in mock-hurt. "Jail, Stone! Jail! How dare you even think about not catching me?" he asked.

His reward for his silliness came in the form of Stone huffing softly in amusement. Ah, he'd never get used to that sound. Sure, hearing Stone laugh fully would beat the small huffs of amusement, and damn did he want to hear Stone laugh more than he did when they reunited, but he'd take what he could get.

"Let's see if you catch me, Mufasa," Stone said, switching spots with Kali.

Despite being in front of Kali and about to fall backwards, his back was devoid of any tension. He trusted Kali more than he trusted anyone else. He was safe, and that thought made him fall backwards with ease.

Kali caught him, struggling with Stone's weight like everyone else did, but he quickly regained steady footing faster than anyone else did. He looked down at Stone, smugness clear in his eyes.

"Caught you," he said, time seeming to slow down as they both got lost in each other's eyes. "I'll always catch you, Vikram. Always."

Stone's eyes softened and he relaxed into Kali's arms. "Promise, Ashok?"

"Promise."

Sarabi coughed, breaking the spell those two were under. When they both scrambled to straighten and turned to look at Sarabi, they realized everyone else was looking at them.

"Uh, we all finished our trust falls, Captain," Cerberus said, filling Kali in on why they were all just standing there. "You guys were the last pair to finish."

Kali cleared his throat, trying to make his embarrassment of being lost in everything that was Stone disappear. He clapped in his hands and said, "Right, well, good job, everyone! Hopefully this did in fact work in helping build trust. I believe that's all we had for today, right, Price?"

Price nodded, amused at Kali's embarrassment. "Yes, that's all we had for the bonding exercise. Go and do whatever with the rest of your time."

One by one, everyone left the training room. Nala, Simba, Gaz, and Soap all went the same direction, trying to stifle their laughter at what had happened.

"Do you reckon they noticed we could hear them?" Soap asked when they were away from Stone and Kali.

Simba leaned against Nala as they walked. "No way, they noticed. I'm sure Mufasa's hoping we didn't notice, though," he said, giggling.

"'I'll always catch you.' What is this, a rom-com movie?" Nala asked, shaking his head at the memory of his captain and Stone. "God, I can only hope they don't pine for long and tell each other their feelings soon."

Gaz shook his head. "I don't think they're going to confess their feelings any time soon. They seem like an oblivious pair."

"They are oblivious," Sarabi said, seemingly appearing out of nowhere. He frowned when everyone else jumped in their spot. "What?"

"Nothing, Sarabi." Simba patted Sarabi's arm. "Anyways, I'm going to bet that they'll eventually blurt out their feelings in front of us during an exercise."

Nala wrapped an arm around Simba's waist. "I can see them doing that."

The other three nodded in agreement, their conversation dying off as they parted ways to spend the rest of the day doing whatever they wanted.

A/N: The ending was a little longer than I thought it would be, sorry if it felt abrupt. I again hope you enjoyed this bonding exercise.

The next one should be funnier and definitely more suited for building trust. Just a little tease for y'all: It involves blindfolds.

Reblogs are welcomed & appreciated! Asks are open, feel free to pop in and talk or request something! (SFW requests only at this time, please and thank you)

[let-spretend]

hey !! very self indulgent fanfic here, wanted to insert reader into the game itself so lots of dialogue is directly pulled from chp 15. armageddon !! could be platonic if you squint ‘cause it’s pretty vague. still open to requests and criticisms.

liu kang x reader !!

"There is nowhere to run, Shang Tsung. Nowhere to hide." Liu Kang opens his arms, looking side to side. "We have banded together to rid all timelines of your evil. The threat you pose to them ends today." He points to the ground.

"Such certainty, Liu Kang. That this battle will end in your favor." Dark Shang Tsung only spits back with venom.

"It can end no other way. Because across all timelines, the arc of history bends toward justice."

"Does it? In this timeline, it bends toward me." Dark Shang Tsung's arms engulf into flames and he starts to swing his arms into a circular motion. Chanting, he shoots a beam of fire towards the sky. Slowly, a portal starts to rip open, lighting up the area. "Behold, Liu Kang, the hell I unleash upon you!" He motions his arm toward the portal and skulls start to pour out, creating a pathway. Dark versions of everyone start to come out, with Quan Chi leading the herd. Dark Shang Tsung and Liu Kang stare each other down, while Dark Shang Tsung's army starts to line up near him. He yells for them to charge, gesturing toward all of you. You start to run up the stairs, with the rest of Liu Kang's army also doing the same. You don't pay any attention to who you were fighting, just interacting with whoever decided to stand in your way. You push and kick your opponents into the green waste between the pyramid stairs.

"My godly might will strike you down." You turn your head to see a Li Mei in similar attire to Raiden. You get into a ready stance and are ready for anything she tries. You notice crackling occurring between her fingertips and you realize she was a version of someone's timeline's Raiden. You land the first punch, cornering her into a wall. Continuously you strike, pushing her down to the floor for enough time to escape. She falls with no intention of getting back up.

You sprint toward the stairs again, climbing up to one of the many platforms on the stairs. You see a flicker of green in the corner of your eye. Before you could act, a version of Syzoth punches you right in the face. You fall to the floor, clenching your cheek. You send a low kick, causing Reptile to meet you on the ground. You push yourself into the air and aim your feet toward Reptile's face. "How you like that, Syzoth?" You chuckle, imagining your timeline's Syzoth being defeated by your hands. Before she could respond, you lift her up from the ground and throw her across the platform. After this action, dozens of dark Shang Tsung's people come rushing towards you. You start to run, sucker punching a dark Kenshi along the way. You hear Sento clank to the ground as you turn the corner. You see an oncoming shadow but no people around. You clamor to the ground as a heavy weight jumps onto you. A person that appears to be Sub-Zero towers over you, ready to strike. You roll to your right and get up onto your knees. "So eager you had to jump onto me?" You banter. She sneers and sends icicles toward you. You crouch down and go for her feet. She acts quickly and jumps up, coming down with a kick. It lands on your stomach, you grunt in pain but punch her in the face as she lands. Blood paints her face as she attempts to wipe it off. Her stance now staggered, she summons an ice flail into her hands. She lunges toward you but you block, the flail breaking on impact. You suck in from the pain and cold it left. You slap her face and punch her in the stomach three times, sending her a couple feet in front of you. As she goes down with a thud, a Dark Sonya that has Kano's eye starts charging toward you. She kicks for your face and tries to slash your arm with her blade. You block all of her attempts and reply with a punch to her face. Her face swings back as her robotic eye releases a deadly beam. You hold her face away from yours and punch her with brute force. She cries in pain and falls.

"You get to be killed by a megastar." You turn around to be met with a Shao Kahn dressed in Johnny's attire. You can't help but let a loud laugh escape your lips. He charges at you and you go flying, landing next to the defeated Sonya. He walks over slowly and you jump up and kick his stomach to keep him from coming any closer. He groans and you keep at it. Punching in any place open and finishing with a kick to the balls. He yells out in pain and topples over. "Learned that on from you, ironically." You retort. You hear a mix of low growling and yelling above you. It was Goro. He jumps off of the roof and lands next to you, making you almost fall over from the impact. He hurls his hammer into your face. Your face burns with pain and you clutch it instinctively. You thought your whole face was taken with the hammer. Goro tries to hit you again with his hammers but is stopped by a punch. He falls onto the stairs but kicks your aid back. You look up to see a Ninja Mime Cage being caught by more Cages. Johnny taps him on the shoulder. He jumps back up quickly and turns his head to the right to see why Johnny tapped his shoulder. Janet also taps him and he faces her. Johnny shouts and "Ms. Cage" does the same. Probably to hype themselves up. Ninja Mime smiles at their antics and also yells silently. You chuckle at the mime's attempt at yelling. He notices your laughter and sends you a wink, but is quickly interrupted by Goro. He swings his hammers toward the three of them and they all dodge. Johnny back kicks Goro in the balls while Ninja Mime flips in the air and kicks his calf. While he winces, Janet kicks him in the face, leading him closer to the ledge. Johnny sends a green blast from his hand hurling toward Goro. You don't remember your timeline's Johnny having powers. Ninja Mime tries to land a finishing kick but Goro grabs his leg. He bends it in an unnatural way, a crackle left his leg. Despite that, he does not make a sound. Although his face contorts in pain and distress. He is tossed by Goro into the green abyss. The Cage's both kick him onto the ledge, pushing him off politely with a send off. Johnny sends you a thumbs up but Janet gives you two. You smile and pick yourself up. You hear yelling behind you but don't bother to turn as another Dark version of Johnny starts to approach.

"You've clearly no sense of self-preservation." You sigh again. "I don't have time for this." You say, in a deadpan voice. Janet scoffs. "Oh, you will." You run towards her and she braces for some sort of attack. But all you do is push her to the floor and take off. "Ugh! Come back here, Y/N!!" You ignore her and run up the never-ending stairs. Your breathing was starting to become shallow. You try to drink your spit to somehow calm yourself and also give you hydration. But it obviously didn't help. You try to look down while running to keep you from seeing the amount of stairs left, knowing the consequences. But you stop, hearing many footsteps ahead of you. You look up to see 4 people. You scan their faces and they all seem familiar but you couldn’t quite place it. Before you could attack, you’re surprised by a weaponized fan.

“Allow me.” Kitana declares.

You happily oblige and let her slay the four in front of you. She ruthlessly slices off limbs and heads. One head with sunglasses on, rolls down in front of you. Weirdly, it felt like a taunt. You try not to think so deeply about it. "Thank you, Princess Kitana. Or.. maybe not a princess?" You say, with uncertainty. It was hard to keep track of everything and everyone. Kitana only chuckles. "You are too cute. Kitana is just fine and you're welcome. Now hurry. There's no time to waste." You were about to reply to her before she was tackled by some person. You were caught by surprise and your first instinct was to help her. You figure she was able to defend herself, but mostly it was the fact that you were being approached once again.

"Reptiloids are apex predators." She calmly says. This time it was a Reptiloid Sindel. You sigh and get into a ready stance. You don't even bother with a quip. Before Sindel could even attack, the ground starts to crackle with red lightning. You look around your surroundings for anything and your eyes land on a chain hanging from a pillar. You kick the pillar to push yourself toward the hanging chain. Sindel screams in pain from the lightning and a figure that looks like Kung Lao, lands. You could see that stupid hat from a mile away. Sindel falls to the floor with severe burns but the figure pays no attention. He removes his hat and cleanly slices the chain you were dangling from, in half. You fall to the floor but get a glimpse of his face. It was Raiden's. "Ew!" You exclaim, not being able to fathom that 'that' exists. He practically flies into you and your stomach burns from his lightning. You dodge his attacks from his hat and begin to punch once he puts it back on. Getting a closer look at the Kung Lao-Raiden mashup, your eyebrows furrow. You push him toward a torch and his clothes catch on fire. He screams and tries to put it out but falls off the pyramid, not realizing where he stood. "That was an abomination.." You breathe out, as you watch him flail to his death.

You jog up the stairs, tired, before noticing two figures. You look up to see Dark Shang Tsung and Quan Chi up at the top, staring down at you attempting to run up the stairs. You see Shang Tsung talking to Quan Chi but can't make out what he says from all the yelling around you. You keep running up the stair trying to catch up. They face each other and start to create a bubble of magic, mixed with orange and green. They both raise it into the sky and throw it into your direction. "Shit!" You dive onto the next platform, as you watch it pass by you and hit many others toward the bottom. Your body aches from the fall and fatigue. "Ugh.." You slowly start to pick yourself up try to continue up the stairs.

But distant growling could be heard from around the corner. Just as you start to catch your breath, three dark clones of Mileena charge toward you with sai in their hands. The two in the back stay in a standby position, while the Mileena in red attire attacks. You grab her arms and make them cross, using her left hand with the sai to puncture her right shoulder. You twirl her to make her face her copies. You use her body to block their advances, also using her arms to attack them. You slice the neck of the Mileena in yellow. You stab the side of one in blue and stab her again but with both sai in the stomach. You kick the Mileena in your hands and take the sai out of hers. You stab her in the chest but have no time to take them back out, as another Mileena charges. You block, but she swipes you off the ground, flipping her sai to face your eyes. You catch her arms and use all your strength to keep her away. She tries to push harder with her body weight but you turn her arms inward, gouging her eyes out with the sai. Her blood flings onto your face as you push her off of you. You stood up quickly, looking at the scene. You were breathing heavily, scared of what could’ve happened. "Fuck..” You just stare at Mileena’s lifeless body. A little bit of payback for Kenshi's eyes.

"Hurry Y/N! You are almost there!" You look up to see a very ethereal-looking Shang Tsung cheering you on, with a version of Quan Chi by his side. But they are both blasted with a green force, which seemed to be sucking their souls out. You watched as their bodies were being ripped away from their skeletons, the flesh sploshing onto the floor.

Dark Shang Tsung was on his knee, supporting himself. You start to run up the pyramid stairs again, angry, but interrupted by a different Quan Chi body slamming you to the floor. You let out a grunt, landing on your arms. "I don't have time for all these distractions.." You state. You waste no time and punch his stomach. Blood sputters out of his mouth from the sudden blunt force. You take a small knife from his belt and decide it was now yours. You swipe for his neck and push in deep, and glide the knife across. Blood spews out and you are drenched in it. "Ugh.." You lightly push him and topples onto the floor. Now you have his and Mileena's blood on your face. You sigh as you start to run, trying to find the stairs again. You hold your new knife tightly, ready for any attack. But instead you find Liu Kang on the stairs, fighting off some foes. He kicks them off and notices you climbing up the stairs. He turns his body and attention towards you. "It's only a little further, Y/N. Follow me." He lingers a little, sort of assessing you. He slightly furrows his brows but gestures for you to follow, which you do.

You both reach the top where Dark Shang Tsung and Quan Chi seemed like they were waiting for you to arrive. You pocket your small knife and form your hands into fists. You looked over at Liu Kang to see him with barely any injuries and effortlessly vibrant. You try to cover up the fact that you were heaving from just climbing all those stairs and the fact that you were admiring him at a time like this.

"Your defenses have failed, Shang Tsung. This is over." Liu kang instructed, while tilting his head slightly.

"I do not think so." Shang Tsung delivers a simple, yet defying answer.

"Realize, sorcerer, that you've brought this on yourself. Avarice and ego have again proved your undoing. We have no choice but to eradicate you." You had to be completely honest, you have no idea what avarice meant but you only nodded in agreement with Liu Kang. You note in your head to start using that Word-A-Day calendar from Johnny...

"It is you who will be eradicated. You and your followers." Shang Tsung's eyes linger on you when he mentions Liu Kang's followers. "And once you are dead, all timelines will be mine." He starts to run toward you and you react the same. You throw a punch but he dodges and extends his claws out. He raises his arms and scratches your chest. You grimace in pain but don't stop for it. You aim a kick to his face and follow with another one. He blocks them all and pushes you and kicks you in the head. You get dizzy and fall to the floor. You try to get back up, knowing Liu Kang needs your assistance. But you couldn't. You slump to the floor, trying to fight the urge to close your eyes. You try and focus on the sounds of grunting and punches being exchanged. You hear Liu Kang's high pitched yells and fire leaving his hands. You cannot stay on the floor any longer. You ignore the gnawing pain in your head and shake it. Your eyes open right as Quan Chi releases a beam in the form of a snake attack Liu Kang. It entraps him and tangles him so he cannot move. Your face contorts that into a scared one, but you take a deep breath.

You try not to seem nervous to your enemies and hold your expression blank. You slowly start to approach the two. "Your position is precarious." Quan Chi states, with a bit of enthusiasm laced within it. "To survive, you must submit." He stops walking and forms his hand into a tight fist. Shang Tsung approaches you, slowly. "Yes. The question you must ask is: if Liu Kang couldn't finish us, how possibly could you?" You didn't say anything, only replying with a solemn facial expression.

Shang Tsung jumps up and tries to land a kick onto your face but you slide and make him miss. He swiftly turns back and punches you consecutively. Every blow hurt, but reminds you that you needed to win, not just for you, but also for Liu Kang and the Realms. You block and grab onto his arm. You throw him onto the ground and start to do the same. Just punch the shit out of him. He cries out in pain but uses his feet to kick you off of him. He extends his claws again and swings in whatever directions he could think of. "Two can play that game." You pull out your small knife and pierce his lower stomach area. He instinctively clutches his wound and you take that opportunity to bash his head onto the ground. He stops moving, but you could tell he was still breathing.

"And they called me the Chosen one." He looks down at your work but looks to you smiling. You were tired but still super happy Liu Kang complimented your efforts. "Thank you, Liu Kang. Should I..?" He places a hand on your shoulder. "You have done more than enough, Y/N. Please, permit me to end this." He lightly squeezes before letting go and again lingering to take a look at you. You look back with an honest face. He blinks and turns away. He begins to swing his arms and sand starts to fall out of his hands. Dark Shang Tsung and Quan Chi slowly start to fade away into sand, then blown by the wind.

"May that be last we see of you." Liu Kang sends the sand off, watching it fade away.

The ground beneath you starts to shake and soon cracks. Liu Kang looked equally as puzzled but you still ask him. "What's going on?" He looks over at you, then back to the few specks of sand. "The timeline! Without Shang Tsung to hold it together, it's falling apart!" His eyebrows furrow as looks at you but he shakes his head, looking at the ground. "You must return to your timeline before this one collapses." His arms engulf into flames and it surrounds you. "Thank you for your aid and presence, Y/N. May we one day meet again.." Before you could process his words, his warm flames start to hug you. "Wait, Liu Kang! I've got so many things to-!" Everything around you turns into white and you're scared for what's to come. Was he going to restart the timeline? Or did he only remove you out of there? You had so many questions and everything had moved by so fast. You could only hope that he would come see you again.

[gwenboucharddidnothingwrong]

i think we can all agree that it’s not gonna be as simple as ‘arthur gets his daughter back, john and arthur get to live separately’ right? but what if it was? (well not quite but hear me out)

kayne has shown that he’s able to interact with faroe in other timelines, and also transport people (john and arthur atleast) between those timelines, but would he really be capable of creating a whole new faroe for arthur even if he is telling the truth? or of giving john his own body? i don’t think so.

i reckon that, for kayne to bring back faroe in the ‘middle c’ universe, he’d have to take her out of another timeline, which would cause all sorts of problems elswhere. (although tbh i wouldn’t put it past kayne. he doesn’t seem all that bothered as to what effects his actions have on other timelines). even if arthur got faroe back, would he just be forced to let her go/have her taken away from him because of some interdimentional reasons beyond his control?

also, what’s so special about the arthur in our timeline? i mean, kayne is most likely not even from the ‘middle c’ timeline, and the whole ‘darkthur’ thing shows he’s been following what’s been going on in the other timelines. who’s to say he’s not been making empty promises to every other arthur and john? AND IF HE HAS WHAT WOULD THAT MEAN (does he need the same thing from multiple timelines?? tbh i don’t think this point is particularly likely, but just putting it out there)

and as for john getting his own body - he wouldn’t be getting his own back. unless kayne is planning on reuniting him with the king in yellow, where the hell would he be getting that body from? would it be human? would it not? (OR HE COULD JUST PUT HIM IN PARKERS DEAD BODY SSJSJDJGJKFJGG)

the promises he made them are really vague which makes me think he’s definitely not giving them the full picture of the deal they’re making (i mean considering it’s kayne we’re talking about i guess that was a given but still).

also i get that, considering the threats that kayne has made, they don’t have much of a choice but to do what he’s told them to, but what about the repercussions of giving kayne what he wants? it’s clearly not gonna be anything good, and now i come to think of it we know next to nothing about his actual motives. so far he’s pretty much just showed up, killed people, and caused problems.

i’m gonna be real i wasn’t paying that much attention at this point in the episode so i can’t actually remember exactly what he wanted arthur and john to get, but considering the threats he made to make sure they didn’t have any option but to do what he wanted, it’s gotta be really important to him.

and tbh, i’ve got a feeling kayne is working for someone, or atleast being made to do this. he went to some pretty big lengths to prove to john and arthur not only how much power he had, but to make it clear what he was willing to do with that power. i don’t actually have much evidence to back this point up tbh but IVE GOT A FEELING ABOUT IT OK

and also why does he need arthur to do it? is it arthur specifically that he needs for whatever reason? i mean that would make sense, why else would kayne be forcing him to do it, and why else would he have gotten john to try and make arthur get that stone (was that what it was? again, i’m bad at following for the whole hour) in new york.

but has he made them do whatever it is because he knows something will happen? has he made all those promises to john and arthur knowing it won’t matter either way because they aren’t going to make it back?

tldr, even if kayne were to give john and arthur what he said he would, there’s no way it would be as simple as he says it is

(wow, didn’t expect this post to go on for so long, well done for reading if you got up to here, have an unrelated doodle i drew in my physics book below the cut and go drink some water or something)

(his name is jumbo!)

[jacksgreysays]

Hello, this is Mergen! I read your response to my comment in Ao3 and really, there is no need to apologize, considering that I am also not giving my answer soon. Since you spend more time on tumblr, I decided to respond here, and then I got sucked into your other passages for weeks. Thank you for giving this idea a chance and if you don't mind, I'll throw some more in for you.

Even if the math doesn't work for Souichi to be Shikako's son, you mentioned that you see the solution to the Konoha civil war in Shikadai becoming Hokage, but he is still young and there is no guarantee that he will become strong or respected enough for the title of Hokage to replace Naruto. He will have the support of half the clans, but this is just politics. So I will again turn to your OC Nara and propose to make Souichi Hokage, he is much older and judging by the description, have the will and motivation and intelligence, some can even get Deja View second coming Shikako.

The second idea was inspired by your fic about Shikako meeting Shinki's mother. I love Gaara and Shinki's relationship in canon, the best thing in Boruto, so I want to reunite this duo and while one is not born yet, we need to confirm Schrödinger's Gaara status. Since Shikako is the only one who has the opportunity to continue the search for Gaara without drawing attention to it, without hope ti find him alive, I wondered what could kill Gaara in the desert. After Gelel, he is the strongest being in Suna. So...

...what if he's not dead?

Back in time, when the war is over, his sister recently married Shikamaru and is about to have a child, everything is going well, Suna is strong and the world is at peace. What if Gaara wanted to sign the summoning contract after seeing how well Naruto and the others did with their summons and how effective they were? Perhaps he lost Shukaku and decided to compensate for his fighting strength by becoming a sage. So he uses reverse summoning and moves to some kind of summoning world. Then there are a dozen developments of events to suit your taste:

1. Gaara failed the test, he was eaten and his body will never be found. Dark enough for a primadonna Au to be real but if you go this route I will cry. Just saying.

2. Time flows differently in the world of Summons and for him 12 days may have passed when for others it is 12 years. He returns to meet a much older and tired Kanuro wearing a Kazekage hat.

3. Shikako finds the domen of the summon, which is located in their world, just very well hidden. Gaara either turned into stone and she will save him in her sage mode, or he meditates for a long time to become a sage and didn’t even notice the passage of time. A punch to the jaw from Shikako is part of the reunion.

This may be an unnecessary plot point, but it will clear the air for Gaara's family and friends.Feel free to use the ideas or not, anyway thanks for your attention!

Hello! I’m glad to see you over on tumblr since, like you said, I really am better at responding on tumblr than I am on ao3—but I do still very much appreciate your ao3 comment as well!

I do love your enthusiasm/affection for my silly Nara OC Souichi, I’m glad that he’s endeared himself to someone besides creator, lol. However he’s not actually THAT much older than Shikadai—or, well, I suppose in the world of shinobi he could be considered much older—I’ve mostly been vague about the timeline, but Souichi is 18 and Shikadai is probably 10ish. He’s due to graduate from the Academy soon. So eight years for a shinobi is a lot, I guess, especially so early on in their careers, but I would still consider them the same generation. Additionally, while he has the motivation and intelligence (and quirkiness) he really is “just an average Nara chuunin.” He made chuunin at 16 years old which isn’t BAD per se, but I think in terms of “Hokage potential” is pretty late in regard to making that international name for himself. Additionally, I know I haven’t explicitly said so, but Shikadai is ALSO motivated and intelligent. The way I see it, Shikadai is more similar to Shikako in her more desperate times, than Souichi is to Shikako in her fun relaxed times, and considering this is the bleak!Primadonna AU, it’s that desperate, battle-oriented Shikako that people would be looking for than an eccentric innovator.

Also, Shikadai doesn’t have the strength/power or the respect/influence NOW, as an Academy student, but that is roughly why if I were to write a “how to resolve the situation in Konoha” it would be a Shikadai-centered fic about how he gains that either through missions or over time or by interacting with other will-be-important figures his age.

As for your second idea—actually it was your initial theory about Souichi that made me bring up Shinki in this series, because the way I’ve written him, in my other DoS Shikaara future fic he is raised by Shikako while Kankurou is his clan head. And I realized, with your initial Souichi theory, that Shinki is probably the closest thing to a child that Shikako and Kankurou could feasibly/safely have in this bleak!Primadonna AU. Especially since Shinki, with his confirmable Magnet Release (as opposed to Shikadai with his probable-but-not-tested Magnet Release) would be the Kazekage heir and thus slightly alleviate some of the stress on Shikadai.

In the ficlet in which Shikako meets Areki (made up name for Shinki’s mother because I don’t know if she has one in canon but I kind of assume not considering what the source manga/anime is) Shinki is definitely already alive. It’s also earlier in the timeline than the first installment/ao3-chapter, so Shikako meets Areki when Shinki is probably about 8 (putting Shikadai at about 6?) and then basically adopts both of them and sort of mentors/helps raise Shinki so that he can safely be introduced to the world as the heir to the Kazekage when the time is right (as opposed to putting that target on the back of an untrained child before he’s ready)

But, that’s not your point: Schrödinger’s Gaara. I super agree with you that after Gelel he is the strongest being in Suna. I also agree that he’s probably not dead so much as like… transported elsewhere (or else-when if we’re getting time travel-y with it) or trapped somehow.

I had briefly though of Gelel Empire related things—like, just because the Dead Wastes are where the “heart” of Gelel’s power was, doesn’t mean they didn’t have other sealing arrays elsewhere through their vast empire. Also, considering sandstorms and since Gaara can control sand, it wouldn’t be to surprising if something was uncovered and Gaara went out to investigate it alone since, after all like you said, who could possibly be a threat to him in the desert where he is strongest? And then mumbledy mumbledy he gets transported somewhere (or some-when) and either can’t find his way back, or doesn’t realize how long it’s actually been, or is stuck. (I did, even more briefly, consider a sci-fi vibe, in the sense that Gaara discovers a Stargate or an old Jedi Temple or something like that but abandoned that since it would be bringing in a crossover and huge genre shift to something that already required a lot of implied background/worldbuilding from readers)

But the summoning realm is very good. And I’ve also previously posited that maybe the summoning realm is not necessarily just for summons. Like, perhaps it should more accurately be called the Spirit Realm, because while most of them are summonable creatures that theoretically look like animals, there could be other non-animal/non-contractable spirits there. I think I also considered writing a fic where the Shinigami and other gods kinda lived in that same alternate plane of existence? However, like you said, the summoning contract card is already so plentiful by itself that I don’t necessarily need to throw in spirits.

1) Oh noooooo, don’t eat Gaara! He’s a good lad TT_TT But that is maybe a little too dark for the bleak!Primadonna AU. Like, I know I have Shikamaru being assassinated, but the idea of Gaara being eaten by summons and never found again is just too dark for some reason? The assassination has political causes and ramifications at least D: Gaara in some boss summon’s stomach is noooooooooooo

2) Time flowing differently is almost… ooh… like, if he were to come back after 12 years and it’s just because time flowed differently. Like, obviously it’s not his fault, but I can see how frustrated Kankurou and Temari and Shikako (and maybe even Naruto?) would be with him if it’s like. THIS ALL COULD HAVE BEEN AVOIDED IF YOU HAD JUST COME BACK SOONER. There’s something to be said about those Fair Folklore and similar mythologies about a human going to another world and dancing for a night and then coming back and realizing a century had passed. Like. It’s almost more forgivable if Gaara comes back AFTER Shikadai is an adult (and possibly Hokage) and everything has resolved itself in one way or another because that’s a scale of time that almost seems like—well, there’s nothing he could have done. Versus any time before that would be frustrating. They wouldn’t be mad at him, but god it would be so frustrating.

3) I will always be so fond of Shikaara, so my heart does love the idea that Shikako—who is the only one who can/still believes enough to keep searching for Gaara—does find him trapped somehow (either turned to stone or in a seal or a sand cocoon that was meant to protect him but then backfired, etc etc) and not freeing him with True Love’s Kiss but, like, practical treatment either via Earth chakra or seals or, as you said, a punch to the jaw, lololol.

It’s the mystery of the ages, truly :)

Thanks again for your comment/asks, Mergen!

[mobius-m-mobius]

HI i just saw ur lokius fairytale post aaand like kinda rotating that cinderella scenario around my head any chance you have any other thoughts to add onto it ?

Hey anon, really glad the fairytale asks stuck with you because we've been having so much fun with them! Honestly I'd not had a chance to think of more until getting this but after having a little time there's a scenario I'm kind of loving which may or may not have spiraled from the og Cinderella concept so apologies in advance 😅

(also putting this under a cut because y'all know me and whew did this get longer than even I'd expected 😂💖)

Cue Ravonna sending Mobius on a reconnaissance mission to get details on Odin being up to something which seems to differ from the usual flow of that timeline, the details are vague enough for him to wonder where she's going with this but they both know the chance for him to get close enough to Asgard is too tempting to pass up and there's an upcoming ball with enough invitations that one more shouldn't be a problem. So he tries his best to at least blend into the background long enough to slip away and search for info but the fact that he's pretty much the only person at the party not boisterously jumping through hoops for Odin's attention or favor draws Loki's attention him like a lightning rod, lol, which doesn't escape mutual notice and since the only other option would be Loki making a scene to draw attention to whoever this mysterious(ly hot) stranger is no one seems to know, Mobius can't help pointing out he's not exactly someone that would be sent in as a physical threat so maybe if he's allowed a few minutes to explain he could make it in Loki's best interest 👀👀

Loki's skeptical but intrigued, and it's not like he was enjoying the night beforehand anyway so he follows expecting some obvious lie of an excuse as to what Mobius is doing there but instead Mobius quite bluntly tells him he's there for dirt on Odin that could be mutually beneficial for them both.

This part he keeps to himself ofc, but by now he's figured out whatever's going on clearly has to do with/is centered around Loki's future and after so many years of researching Lokis he's secretly harbored a crush and honestly does want the best for them if possible so it's very easy to at least tell the truth about why he's trying to sneak around in the first place. Loki doesn't completely believe him, but he's infinitely more interesting than anyone in recent memory and Loki's desperate to learn about him so he haughtily declares Mobius no real threat, and will guide him through the palace personally to seek out this all important info, with the threat of imprisonment if the night ends empty handed.

Mobius cheerfully agrees with the knowledge he'll be long gone through a time door before things come to that, and the night is kind of playing out like a fantasy he didn't even realize he had so because he knows it won't last he lets himself be a little playful with Loki, praising his magic and asking questions he hadn't been able to answer from his files, like which flower first comes to mind when he looks out at the gardens?? Loki of course bristles at first but soon realizes how much comfort there is in the way Mobius speaks to and about him, and how his words bask brighter and warmer than any sun 🥺

However, because of this he can also tell Mobius knows far more about him than he previously let on, and can't figure out why he seems so delighted by all the qualities everyone else has been so bothered by his entire life so as they search through Odin's private study he starts needling for details to match, eventually getting nothing but things that completely baffle him like how Mobius obviously has horrible taste in food and that he seems wiser beyond his years than any Midguardian he's ever seen yet somehow seems to have nothing of personal value in his life except something called a jet ski?? And he's taken aback how, when pressed, Mobius isn't even upset about it but just a bit sadly resigned. They share a moment of bonding over their prior loneliness and start to grow even closer, leaning in just before a crash sounds from the hallway and the sounds of drunken guards calling for there whereabouts of Prince Loki echo, forcing them to break apart as Loki panics about how to explain Mobius' presence and bringing Mobius back to reality about how far he let the night spiral by indulging so it's all he can do but stumble out an apology for everything as Loki tries to find a way for them to sneak away before turning back just in time to see the gleam of a time door disappearing in the middle of the room 😔

Now the whole "glass slipper" element is a harder one since it's not like even if Mobius left behind something TVA related Loki would be able to trace it back to him so this is where I headcanon he dropped a folded magazine photo of a fav jet ski he liked to carry around as a reminder of why he works so hard, that he had taken out to show Loki was he was talking about earlier and Loki uses to trace back to Don, alerting the TVA due to the obvious branch it cases, and then you can only how everything Mobius knows implodes from there which would probably take me a year to detail but is very fun to picture and yes because I love him this would also result in Don meeting the Loki of his timeline because he deserves love too 😂😂

[possibilistfanfiction]

What are your domestic headcanons for Bea and Ava in your surgeons AU? And how did Ava realise that they are not cis? And how/when did Beatrice realise she wanted top surgery?

these are great questions i will now come up with answers to bc they're mostly vague in my mind before the actual timeline starts! lmfao

a domestic thing -- ava is obviously, like, incredibly gifted at charming people anywhere, at any time, doing anything. i think bea is a little terrified at first when she starts bringing ava to stuff — trivia night, the climbing gym, even just over to mary + shannon's for dinner — that everyone will immediately love ava way more. or, even worse, that bea will suddenly be expected to be the same kind of charming, to love attention in the same way, to laugh as quickly. but it's not like that at all, obviously: everyone is Delighted by ava & also delighted by bea — quietly, in a way that's still comfortable & happy for her. at the climbing gym ava tried adaptive climbing, like, one time & was like 'no ty lol', but he still loves to come & watch. bea is... quite serious, but ava isn't, so in like ten minutes ava's made friends w all of the people bea enjoys climbing with. the next time bea comes to climb, no one expects anything differently from her, but they ask after ava, a few of the boys tease her for having such a cool, hot partner (fondly, & she loves it), they invite ava out with them for beers saturday. i think they open up each other's worlds in different ways but the crux of it is the same. love them! as @princington said 'they're so tangible' & like they rly are

another domestic thing -- bea can't cook. she's abysmal at it, even after cooking classes. she tries to cook for ava One Time & it truly is so inedible ava just kisses her & orders pizza. she can make eggs, barely, & that's about it. ava tells her they're the best eggs, though

last domestic thing -- they're a big slipper household. at first ava thought it was kinda cute that bea was partial to a nice pair of teva slippers (also, of course, had to tease her) but the second ava tries them he's like oh fuck yah, i get it. needless to say, as he justifies bc of his difficult circulation system but rly just for fun, he gets... a Lot of slippers lol. also bea steals all of ava’s beanies. it’s only fair

in the context of this au, i don't think ava's ever rly been sold on being cis lol. even as a little kid before the accident, ava was happy to just play & imagine & sing & dance. their mom never forced them to Be A Girl, & ava didn't mind, really, when they were in the orphanage, but it never felt like it truly fit. not in a dysphoric way, but just that it was limiting. ava's body was confusing, was hard to come to terms with in that it wasn't the same anymore, they couldn't feel all the things they used to love. so when they finally had the opportunity to like go Be Queer, be in community, her world Opened Up in the most beautiful way. ava LOVES the playfulness & expansion of gender & the body, the control she has over not having to fit in a box. the world is so, so big & so, so lovely, & u know ava also HATES colonized ideas of anything lol, so it just makes sense. in undergrad they had some good trans buddies but also like... drag? LOVE. so it's rly fun for ava, especially with good people

hmm i think bea probably wanted top surgery from day 1 of puberty on but didn't realize until late in college. after a lot of reassurance from her friends that she didn't have to be a Trans Man to want to try a binder, she did, & p much that first night she knew bc she just felt so much better, like her body made sense & she could just relax. idk if bea ever rly feels gender euphoria but she does feel a lot of peace & so that's cool. probably she tells cam first, maybe lilith & cam together, that she wants surgery. by that time they're already in med school & also... they both know lol & so they're rly happy for her & they make her lots of snacks & take care of her afterward. lilith keeps her out of the gym for months even tho bea complains that she's bored & will be so out of shape, cam makes a bunch of food frequently. they're a little family & it's a rly joyful, quiet, happy time; she feels very lucky

[fabbyf1]

I think it’s inevitable with RPF that characterizations are going to be similar. We all rely on the same basic facts and we build what we consider to be canon together, so I’d honestly be worried if characterizations were vastly different—it’s still fanfic, we’re not building brand new characters each time. People get into RPF by reading RPF, so while there’s some variation we all share a vaguely similar idea of what these characters are like and we form those ideas together whether we know it or not, and that in turn gives us a sandbox we can all kind of mess around in together. Obviously lifting whole bits of dialogue or common phrases is very different, though. I think ‘thinking with [character]’s dick’ is a common one but the other two you mentioned seem pretty specific. Again sorry, literally stumbled in off the street and am only distantly aware of what’s happening—I hope this doesn’t come off as rude

Hello, anon.

I appreciate your non-biased and objective opinion on this matter. Really, I do. You make a lot of great points that I wholeheartedly agree with. RPF is a beast. Every story is going to have "similar" characteristics if we're following canon timelines and making our characters as realistic as possible.

I also agree that, as a fandom, we tend to... make up a lot of common personality traits and use them over and over again until it’s hard to remember that they aren’t necessarily real. And they’re not based on facts. But we all continue to use them in our fics, and it helps them to be cohesive and easy to follow along from fic to fic. It helps us writers not have to character build as much as we would in an original fiction. 

A quick example of this is Max referring to Charles as "schatje". I think that's a very commonly used nickname in F1 RPF, even though Max himself has never publicly called anybody that. We have just decided, as a fandom, that that’s the dutch endearment he would use. It’s also easy to take commonly repeated phrases from Max The Person and shove them into our dialogue to make it easier for our characters to have a voice. For example, the phrase “of course” is used a lot in Max's dialogue because Max Verstappen (the person) says it a lot. 

But I think it's important for this instance, for the plagiarism that I'm speaking about, that you know the full context and don't just "stumble in off the street". You openly admitted that you're not fully aware of the situation, and that's totally okay. It's actually kind of refreshing to know not everyone is as concerned about this and that not everyone sees the copycat works as much as often as I do. 

If you’re a casual reader of F1 RPF, you probably don’t know it’s happening. 

But it’s not just me it’s happening to. Lots of other prolific authors are being taken advantage of and having their works stolen from them on an every day basis, and it really needs to stop. We all create this content for free, but that doesn’t mean we don’t have ownership over it. And the only logical reason I can see for people to steal our work is that they are attention-seeking and looking for clout. They want to be known as one of the great RPF authors. They want love and admiration. 

And it’s fine to want that. 

But you shouldn’t want it so badly that you’re willing to steal other people’s work to get it. 

That’s... disgusting. 

This is not the first time I’ve had my work stolen, and it won’t be the last. It’s not the first time somebody has been too heavily inspired by my work, and it won’t be the last. I know that is the risk I take with every fic I publish. It’s just a shame that it’s gotten so out of hand. 

I would like to correct you on one thing, though.  

You said: “I think ‘thinking with [character]’s dick’ is a common one but the other two you mentioned seem pretty specific.” but that’s not what I said. If you’ll go back and read my original post, my direct quote was, “but maybe that was [insert characters]'s dick talking," which is a very different phrase. If you’ve ever read my work, you will see that my characters often go on and on (and on) for a paragraph or two, lusting after the other character, sometimes spiraling further and further until it no longer makes sense and will end with “... but maybe that was [their] dick talking.” 

Again, I will say that I do not own that phrase, but I wouldn’t say that was a commonly used phrase in Formula 1 RPF until I started using it. 

I would know because I’ve been reading F1 RPF since it first started getting posted on AO3. 

I have read a good majority of the (completed) F1 fics posted to AO3. 

I know what existed before I started writing and what has appeared afterward. 

And again, let me clearly say I am not claiming to own that phrase or any other combination of words. But when that phrase, along with other commonly used phrases from my fic, all appear one after another in someone’s work? It’s too much of a coincidence to say it wasn’t intentional. 

But I do not expect you to know that since, as you said, you stumbled in off the street. 

I hope that makes sense. 

I hope we can all stop stealing from each other, or this fandom will be over before you know it. 

[hms-no-fun]

something in particular from the chapter stood out to me: there is a conscious decision to use the term "upsilon kids" diagetically, within the text, to refer to the group that had for a long time been referred externally as "the upsilon kids" within the fandom. any reason why you decided to make that leap?

well, the fandom called them the upsilon kids because i told them to. i always wanted these four to stand as parallels to the omega kids from hs2/hs:bc, and as echoes of the beta and alpha kids from homestuck proper. canonizing the name "The Upsilon Kids" is part of a larger strategy on my part that i'll expound upon a bit here.

you'll notice a few key bits of information being repeated in different contexts in this chapter. nods to three years ago, six years ago, ten years ago, etc. this is a deliberate choice to hammer home the timeline that we'll be working on going forward. this will (i hope) become increasingly useful as the story goes on, and we learn more about these characters and how they grew and changed over time. a big running theme of 3.2 is the notion of being in the middle of a story. the cast of godfeels, like us, have found themselves dropped into an ongoing narrative whose particulars don't really have anything to do with them. so much of the shift towards space opera has been about making the homestuck regulars feel less like the center of the universe. these are stories that have happened, and will happen, regardless of their attention or participation, which will nevertheless have an impact on their lives.

the burning core of 3.2 is the timeline of the upsilon kids. i very much like the idea of projecting a narrative forward to give the reader a vague sense of what's coming. lost on samsaria at 16, returned to the ewl at 23, betrayed at 26, dana & lenore reunited at 29. this means that the question isn't so much what happened as it is why it happened, which is always the more interesting question for me to write about anyway. so, back to your question-- it might've been good enough to just mention that Dana and her friends used to be "intergalactic celebrities," and indeed earlier drafts did leave it at that. but celebrity is a really vague, fluid concept, and i actually think that by itself is a less interesting fact as a result. adding the note that they were famous as a group for a specific event which defined their celebrity is just that much tastier. it's personal, you know? and it being personal in turn elevates and complicates the nature of Jade's betrayal.

i think, also, the diegetic proper noun The Upsilon Kids also stands as an interesting parallel given what we learned about Dana's history in B1C1. repeated themes in different contexts.

there's a lot of exposition in these early chapters of 3.2, because we're currently in the process of shaping a mold. i want you to see and understand this shape from a distance, to broadcast what is and is not a going mystery, so that you have an idea what to look for once we get to the point that we're actually starting to fill that mold with something. there's more i could say about this storytelling philosophy but i'll save that for another day, i think :)

[moreespressoformydepresso]

knock knock ⭐ losing battle plssss

(future me adding this later because I want people to see this without reading this whole mess: In The Losing Battle, Lamina loves Treech while Tanner loves the idea of Treech. Explanation is at the end of the post below)

Omg okay there is so much I could and want to talk about but I'd be writing several essays so I'll try to keep this contained to one thing. If anyone else is interested I'll ramble about the other stuff because there is so much that I haven't put into text yet or have kept vague/implied so far (IE what exactly happened between Treech and Vipsania during the interviews and dynamics between characters that are neither Treech nor Lamina). A lot of it is due to perspective restraints, because I love me an unreliable narrator to the point where I've never written anything that didn't contain it to some degree but it does make it difficult to fully get across what the character thinks vs what's actually happening around them. There's a lot of smaller inaccuracies in their perception of reality that I don't see anyone mentioning (though to be fair not many people talk to me about the fic) so I don't know if anyone caught them or not. A shame, really, because I've put a stupid amount of thought into them.

Also, there's just so much to say about all my fics but especially this one! I could talk about all the different motivations of characters who aren't very present or the tensions building in the background or the deep explanations of why characters do what they do that TreeMina isn't self-aware or present enough for to realize or I could talk about how this whole fic's basic premise is the soul-crushing reality that major, world-shattering changes on a personal level barely have any impact on the bigger picture until decades in the future but I'll pick just one. Oohh this is gonna be difficult I just really want to type whatever comes to mind but I can't. But! That's enough useless introductory words. Onto the unhinged ramblings of a mad entity!

The mini LumberHouse subplot! Otherwise known as why Tanner really doesn't like Lamina in this fic, even if it isn't that apparent due to how small his role is in the story.

I'm choosing Tanner because I have a lot to say about him, but unlike the main duo or Vipsania and Pup, Tanner isn't gonna get a big spotlight chapter as it stands right now. Maybe as a mini spin off one-shot but I'm not planning on it. Vip and Pup will get more focus later, especially once Treech and Lamina are out of the arena, but Tanner just doesn't have enough impact on the story to get that. Which is the intention here.

My basic idea for Tanner is that he's someone who very clearly has his own life and complicated emotions during the games, with pain and drama and the whole shebang, but it all happens in the background. You can get a good idea of his struggles if you pay attention but it's just as easy to read past and not even notice, because he's not a main character. He's my representation for the way all these kids had their own stories that could just have easily been the one you were reading, but you aren't. So you only get glimpses whenever one of the actual main characters is close enough to take note. Most of his story is implied, with enough room for other people to have different interpretations than what I intended. The timeline in my head for the Tanner/Treech arc of Tanner's life is as follows:

Tanner didn't even really notice Treech before the arena bombing. Sure, he enjoyed the singing and he knew his name, but at most he really noticed him due to his proximity to Lamina, who Tanner tended to pay attention to due to her crying. Then Treech had the balls to turn Coral's offer down during the bombing. and Tanner really started to see Treech. The way he shared all of his food, the small ways in which he showed kindness, the way his face lit up so prettily when he smiled. Tanner became intrigued, but only ever from a distance. With dawning horror he realizes he's developed a crush on a boy he'll be forced to kill in a matter of days, and he can't even go and talk to him. When they meet up in the arena, it's no accident. Tanner deliberately snuck away from Coral and Mizzen to see if he could catch a glimpse of Treech and possibly even talk to him, if only to give himself some closure. When he finds Treech with Dill, his feelings deepen, but when he hears Lamina calling for him... When he sees the way those two interact, he knows he's lost. He lost before he even began.

See, Tanner dislikes Lamina, but it's not for anything she's done. It's because she has what he wants to have: A connection with Treech. She's had years to get to know him and spend time with him, and Tanner didn't even get an hour. Now, he's not stupid, Tanner knows that he and Treech were never gonna be a thing because no shit, one of them is gonna have to die here, but it doesn't lessen the jealousy. It doesn't erase the what-ifs and the might-have-beens. And unlike Lamina, Tanner doesn't get to spend his last few days with someone he cares about. Brandy's gone and Treech is at the top of his alliance's blacklist. Whether he lives or dies, he'll have spent these days as good as alone.

The biggest difference between Tanner and Lamina that made TreeMina endgame instead of LumberHouse is that Tanner has a crush where Lamina is in love. One of the most painful things for Tanner is that he knows he could've loved Treech if he'd had the time, and maybe it could have been mutual, but they don't. Lamina did have that time, and over the years she and Treech fell in love far past a simple crush. Basically, Lamina is scared of losing what she has where Tanner laments what might have been if things were just a little different. Tanner doesn't actually know Treech, they've barely spoken to each other, and while he has a good grasp of who Treech is due to what he's seen so far, he's only seen bits and pieces of his person. Therefore, he can't really love Treech. He has a crush on him, and he loves the idea of Treech he has in his head based on what he's observed. How accurate that image of him is, is a whole different question. Lamina, meanwhile, has had years to get to know him. She and Treech have shared many vulnerable, personal moments together and their bond has grown incredibly strong over the years. Not even betrayal could fully break it. Lamina truly loves Treech, because she knows him better than anyone else. From his strengths to his biggest flaws, she's seen them all and she loves him for it.

Lamina gets to stay with Treech because she knows him in ways Tanner will never get the chance to, and he hates her for it.