#also in the end because it wouldn't let me upload otherwise

[data-demon]

The Cure - Alone

[bethelighthalazia]

Dancing Forever

Summary:  When your boyfriend doesn't take enough care of himself, the inevitable happens at the end of one of ATEEZ’s concerts.

Pairing: bf!Yunho x fem!reader

Word Count:  983

Warnings: angst, injury, blood

[ AN: Since some people asked, here is part two to "Last Dance". It´s not very long, but I hope you guys like it anyway <3 RE-UPLOAD FROM MY OLD ACCOUT @justsomedreaming tagging @mingis-mizu, @vic0921 since they asked :3]

© by bethelighthalazia. Do not repost, copy or translate. Unless stated otherwise, those works are mine and born from my own ideas. I don't have any claim on the mentioned real existing Idols whatsoever.

Seonghwa´s arms tightly around you, you can´t hold back a sob, tears wetting his skin, since he's still in his stage outfit. “Shh, it's okay, he'll be fine, Y/nnie.” He whispered, not able to ban the tremble from his own voice. His hands gently caressing your back, he looked around to make sure that the security staff emptied the hall quickly. You two had been standing there for almost an hour before he slowly started walking to the backstage area, pulling you with him. When you reached the room where they gathered before the show, you froze in the doorway, eyes puffy from the crying. “Y/nnie, we-” Honjoong starts, but Mingi already crossed the room to pull you into his arms to calm you down just a bit at least. 

“He's okay. Take a breath, Y/nnie, for Yunho, yes?” Mingis voice was quiet, a tremble in it tells you that he's scared too, but he also sounds somewhat optimistic. “Our doctor here has checked on him, it's not as bad as it looked like.” He hummed, his hand resting on the back of your head while he looked at the others, silently asking if they should let you see Yunho or wait a bit. When the others nodded, Mingi leaned back a little, taking your face in his hands and smiled at you. “Look at me,” He waited for you to look into his eyes and then a small smile spread on his lips, you´re not sure if he tried to convince you or himself though. “He's okay, he's just sleeping for now. It looks bad, but I promise you, Yunho is okay.”

Nodding slowly, Mingi then led you over to the sofa where they had laid Yunho down to rest. He looked rather pale, but you saw his chest moving, his head had a bandage wrapped around, covering the spot where his head hit the stage, dried blood on his outfit. “Y- yuyu…I- I'm sorry, I- I should have noticed-” You whispered when you dropped to your knees next to the sofa, carefully brushing some hair out of his face, your voice hoarse from the crying. Yunho shifted when he heard your voice, his lips parting slightly, but you didn't notice it at first, because you had laid your head on his chest, listening to his heartbeat. “I should- I should have made you sleep and eat…then this would- wouldn't have hap-” “Jagiya…please-” Yunho's weak voice interrupted your little ramble, his fingers caressing your head caused you to look up at his face. 

“Jagi…’ts not your fault,” he hummed, voice slightly slurred, but he would never let you beat yourself up over something that's his fault, and his alone. “Didn't want…to disappoint you or he boys…” You could hear the others shift behind you at his words, ready to tell him that they would never be disappointed in him, but with a little wave of your hand you stopped them. “Yuyu…why didn't you talk to us?” At your question, he sighed quietly, frowning. “I- I thought you were mad at me or something because…it seemed like you avoided me, Yuyu…” “I was mad at myself, jagi. For messing up my lines and- and taking so much time to practice and everything…I was mad at myself that I didn't spend as much time with you anymore.” Yunho mumbled quietly, a little scoff behind you let both of you look up and frown. 

It had been Mingi, his fingers massaging the bridge of his nose. “Yunho, if you wouldn't lay there right now, I'd really kick your behind.” He said, shaking his head with an exhausted expression. “We all thought you and Y/nnie had a fight or something, because you'd spend more time at the company than with her. It was bad enough for us to think you'd blow off the pro-” “The promise you made us to ask y/nnie to come on the next tour with us!” Wooyoung interrupted Mingi quickly, the taller one's eyes widened when he clears his throat. Now it was Yunho who scoffed with a little sigh, he knew exactly what Mingi was talking about. While you were looking at his friends, Yunho carefully reached into his outfit's pocket and pulled out a little velvety box that he had hidden in there the whole concert.

“Well- I uhm-” he started, swallowing hard as he tried to sit up, but you quickly turned to make him lay down again, you wouldn't want to rush him get hurt even more. “Jagi, I-” Another sigh, he seemed nervous for some reason, but before you could say something, he continued to speak. “I actually…wanted to do this on stage after the concert today…Hongjoong hyung had helped me to plan this, but- uhm, well- I…Y/n, d- would you- I-” Yunho stammered, stumbling over the words that were basically just spilling from his lips. For a moment, you thought the injury on his head might be the reason, so you already wanted to get water or the doctor again, but Yunho gently took your hand in his.

“Jagiya…would- would you do this dance of life with me together forever? A- as my wife?”

This question had you stunned. Yes, you and Yunho were in this relationship for almost two years now, but you never thought about marriage before. Especially the last weeks, you secretly feared he would break up, so you absolutely did not expect this. Then his rambling before, he wanted to ask you on stage? Propose to you publicly in front of thousands of fans and cameras? You only realized that you probably took too long to think, because behind you, seven throats were cleared to pull you out of your thoughts, making you look at Yunho. Your precious boyfriend, who's looking at you with his wonderful dark puppy eyes. 

“I- Yes, Yunho. I would love that.”

taglist: @mingis-mizu, @tinyelfperson

(if you want to be added to a taglist, follow the taglist-link in my pinned post)

[hiemaldesirae]

The Hazbin Graduate's Guide to Homicide [4]

ENCLOSED IS AN EXCERPT FROM THE JOURNAL OF ALASTOR HARTFELT. IF YOU ARE NOT THE INTENDED RECIPIENT, DISPOSE OF THIS LETTER IMMEDIATELY LEST YOU BEFALL SEVERE CONSEQUENCES INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO, LOSS OF FINGERS, LIMBS, AND LIFE. THANK YOU FOR YOUR DISCRETION. SIGNED, DEAN LUCIFER MORNINGSTAR.

To my generous patron X, I'm still not quite sure how I feel about this... impromptu academic journey. Though I thank you dearly (and cannot ever fully repay you) for giving me the opportunity to study such unique and diverse methods of... disposal, shall we say, it is a double edged sword of sorts. I have made a few friends- two of whom I would consider close, though I doubt I have much experience in the lane of 'close' friends- and yet more enemies, one of which is particularly aggravated by me for reasons I simply cannot fathom. I'm choosing to believe right now that it is because she is immune to any form of good comedy (a politer way of saying that the girl simply has no sense of humor whatsoever and should possibly schedule an appointment with Professor Beelzebub to see if there's something to be done in regards to her vehement refusal to let any joy in life into her heart). In any case, X, I will take this chance to reassure you that I am learning more than I ever thought I would have in the hands-on and rigorous academic processes of Hazbin Institute, and that the people I have met during my stay all total to a very enjoyable stay thus far. I will, of course, keep you updated on the various comings-and-goings of my studies and how my thesis is being planned out, as well as the various roadblocks I have no doubt I'll be facing. Once more, thank you for your thoughtful sponsorship. I do hope that my results are to your liking.

Yours sincerely, A.H.

P.S. A note to all the lovely readers, I've made a few updates in the previous installments of this series. Alastor is now rooming with Charlie and throwaway lines have been corrected to not mention the names of plot-relevant characters. Also, as a content warning, there is some slightly transphobic rhetoric used (I tried to limit it as much as I could but there really wasn't a way for me to word it properly while trying to express the idea.) If you don't want to see that, then feel free to skip to the end of Vox and Alastor's conversation in the Jade Forest. Please enjoy this new upload of the Hazbin Institute for Homicide Practitioners!

[ 1 ] / [ 2 ] / [ 3 ] <- more murder academy radiostatic

Though it may come as a surprise to those who knew him in a broader sense, Alastor wouldn't consider himself particularly well versed in the art of cooking (though he knew several people who would immediately jump to say otherwise). In his mind, cooking had always been more of a pasttime for him: a hobby to spend time bonding with his mother during and hide from his father's harsh words and harsher actions.

That was why Alastor's impromptu (not actually impromptu, he simply referred to it as such because he hadn't spent days agonizing over it like he would on other choices) decision to take up work in the Institution's kitchen was so out of character for him.

However- however out of character it seemed on the surface, Alastor was also quite the frugal spender. Though the funds entrusted to him by his sponsor were more than enough to supply him with everything he needed through the academic year and then some, Alastor was a man who had lived his childhood and early pre-teenaged years through the desolation of the Great Depression and the Dust Bowl, barely managing to scrape by thanks to his mother's innovation and resilience.

This upbringing, in turn, translated to a refusal to spend more than what was needed for a modest life, and a need to save every last penny that came his way. Plus, given the current path his thesis looked to be taking, Alastor had decided some weeks ago that it was much better to have excess funds left over than to have to struggle his way through the bayou once more.

Besides, this way, he got to learn more recipes to show to his Maman once he got back home.

The main chef of the kitchen was named Vortex, and from the interactions Alastor had witnessed while coming in and out of the back kitchen, he was involved with Professor Beelzebub in some sort of way. Whether they were courting or married or perhaps engaging in some sort of extra-marital affairs was a question completely beyond him, but either way, they both seemed happy and Alastor didn't quite care enough to ask further.

This was not to say that didn't mean he didn't speak to Vortex at all, of course- in fact, when he found out that the man spoke French (though it wasn't Creole French, he'd take it), the two had started talking on and off during shifts.

He'd also started to play piano at the local on-campus bar, a place that was surprisingly affordable given their one-drink only rule (a precaution to make sure that the undergraduates of Hazbin's didn't turn to alcohol to cope with whatever poor decisions they had made to land themselves here, no doubt).

This was a decision that had led to him making friendly small talk with the bartender, Husk (another student working odd jobs around campus to make up for the money that wasn't going into tuition) and adding another acquaintance to the motley crew of fellows he'd gotten to know in his weeks spent at Hazbin's.

There was his roommate, Charlie- who he'd never actually seen, save for hearing the occasional quiet sobbing from the bathroom at ungodly hours in the night while he was trying to concentrate on studying- a short young woman who introduced herself as Niffty and proudly proclaimed that her major was 'Murdering Your Spouse!', Husk, Rosie; the woman that Vox had told him about, and-

Well. Vox himself, obviously.

When Alastor had figured out why it was that Vox had sounded so familiar, he'd spent days agonizing over how to confront the man.

There was no way in any of Dante's infernos that he would be going straight up to Vox and saying something along the lines of 'I know your true identity and how you're dressing as a man when you were born as a woman' because if Alastor had learnt nothing from his father at all he had at least been engrained with a sense of subtlety and chivlary. And if his intuition served him right, he had a feeling that Vox wouldn't quite appreciate being referred to as a woman anyhow, given how he'd gone to such painstaking lengths to conceal his identity.

In the end, he hadn't even had to broach the topic himself. Vox had brought it up one day, completely out of nowhere while they were sitting under the shade of bamboo stalks in the Jade Forest, a place on campus grounds meant to imitate the serenity of real Chinese bamboo forests. "You know you're not the best at hiding your feelings, right?"

Alastor had immediately shot back with an offended, "And you are?"

This had come after a night spent at the bar, where Vox had somehow managed to get himself drunk after exactly three quarters of a glass of whiskey and ended the night sobbing into Husk's hat. He realized only after the words came out of the mouth that he was doing nothing but proving Vox right, but to the other man's credit, the only reaction he showed was the small upwards tilt of his mouth, a smile that said, I got you.

"Have you seen any of my movies before, or was it something else that gave me away?" Vox asks casually.

So casually, in fact, that the almost flies over Alastor's head, and he has to do a double take at the other man, who throws his head back and laughs, long and hard, howling like a hyena.

When he finally calms down, Alastor is staring at him unimpressed, which just sets him off again.

"Oh- oh my God, your face- oh, dear God, that's the best. If I knew that wasn't genuine I'd try and have you nominated for an award. Jesus, Al, I'm not an idiot, you were looking at me like I'd grown two heads in that one seminar from Professor Beelzebub when I said I had personal experience with chopping off someone's breasts." Vox finally got out, wiping a tear from his eye as he gasped for breath. It was oddly endearing as much as it was absolutely exasperating.

"Can you really blame me?" Alastor frowned. "I mean, even past... your own proclivities- or, I mean, your- ah-"

"Taking matters into my own hands?"

"Right. That. Even past that, it feels like a bit of an odd comment to make in the middle of a lecture."

"She was asking for examples. What was I supposed to do, not say anything?" Vox rolled his eyes, then flopped back onto the picnic blanket he'd brought out.

Neither of them had actually brought out any foods that day- it was clam chowder soup day in the dining hall, and Alastor had simply elected to skip out and bake a loave of bread for himself later, whereas Vox... honestly, given what he knew about the man, probably didn't eat anything at all. It was almost concerning how skinny the other was, considering between the two of them it had been Alastor who'd lived through the worst economic decline of the century.

In any case, the picnic blanket had mostly been decoration, but Vox had also cited not wanting to get his uniform dirty when he laid down.

Now, looking at the other man lying down on the picnic blanket, Alastor was reminded of a motion picture that Mimzy had dragged him to after several hours of painstaking bargaining- one that had featured Vox (well, the name he'd went by outside of Hazbin, anyway. Alastor still had no idea which of the names Vox considered his 'real' name and he frankly had no intentions of asking) in the same position, but in a great deal less clothes (thankfully, not none or else he wagers he would've picked up a rock and started bashing his skull in), and he looked away once more, willing himself to stop the flush spreading over his face.

"So..." Vox spoke again, breaking the relative peace of their silence. "Have you wrapped your head around the whole thing?"

Alastor paused, then nodded, still resolutely not looking in Vox's direction. "I assume this is... who you would rather be?"

"Well, obviously," Vox confirmed, though not without a bit of snark that Alastor had come to know was standard for the man over the weeks they'd spent together. "Being Vox Vanhal is... a great deal better than being Aussen Vesper, I'll tell you that much."

"Okay," Alastor said. And then, "That's quite the relief, then, because I was not prepared to start treating you like a lady."

Thankfully, despite Alastor's un-characteristic slip of the tongue, Vox only barked out another hyena-like laugh at that comment, and they spent the rest of the day trading murder tactics.

So that was one of Alastor's problems resolved. Another one, though, happened to lie with another one of his housemates in Pride House, a woman who had been there for a year or so by the time of his arrival. For whatever reason, Vaggie Mariposa had taken it upon herself to try and upstage Alastor in every class they'd shared together- which was a lot, considering they were both undertaking the same major of Murder Your Enemies.

It wasn't as though she was succeeding very well, though, besides a prank she had pulled on his radio that had- embarrassingly- caught him off guard and ended up earning him a demerit. Of course, not even a week later, he'd gotten her back with much the same setup, and earned her that same demerit. So in all, it wasn't as much a concern to him as it was a very petty move done by a woman who really should know better, considering she was taking a course to murder her enemies.

(Of course, there was also the times he'd caught her waiting outside the hallway to his room, but that was of as much concern as a stray mouse would be to an eagle.)

In truth, the only real thing that actually concerned him was the girl he shared a room with. He had confided in the matter with Rosie, who, as Vox had told him before, was really quite the counselor when it came to giving advice. He was glad to have met her here- the woman, of course, being a student taking the major of 'Murder Your Spouse' had nothing but an endless patience for Alastor's troubles, the same way he imagined that she had had to have cultivated for dealing with the absolutely useless man she was married to.

"...anyway, I don't understand there is to do about her. She's weeping every night and keeping me up, but it's not as if I can breach the topic with her when she's someone I hardly know," Alastor shrugged. "I'm no good with weepy overgrown children. Whatever it is she's discovered about herself, I wish she'd simply keep it to herself."

"Alastor," Rosie chided him. "That's no way to speak about your roommate. She's likely under a lot of pressure, poor girl- some students are on the verge of flunking out, you know, and as I'm sure the Dean has told you, there are very severe rules for failing at Hazbin's. At least show her some sympathy. Talk to the girl, lecture her if you must, but don't disparage her."

Vox had said much the same thing when Alastor had gone to him to complain instead, so, in the end, he'd given in. The next time he'd found himself poring over one of the large textbooks Professor Mammon had insisted on them buying and heard the stifled sobbing coming from the bathroom, Alastor sucked in a sigh and left his seat.

He knocked on the door hesitantly. "Hello? Are you alright in there, dear?"

The sobbing stopped near instantly, though Alastor could still hear quiet sniffling. "I'll need an answer, if you don't mind. I'd rather not have it on my conscience for causing you to hit your head on the bathtub edge and drown- though I suppose that may earn me a few more points."

"I'm fine," came the firm but quiet response on the other side. "I just- I need a bit."

"I'll be here, then, if you wish to talk," Alastor said. With that hand of invitation extended, Alastor went back to sit down at his desk, feeling a little prouder of himself for managing a show of compassion instead of harming the girl's esteem further.

What he didn't expect, though, was for that hand to be taken- weeks later, during a pre-Track warmup.

"Is... Is this a good time?"

Charlie Magne, the girl who Alastor had been roomed with stares at him with eyes so wide she looks like a caricature more than a person, and when Vox and Rosie let out twin gasps, Alastor feels a part of him shrivel up inside, knowing both of them will make him talk to her.

"I... I'm sorry, but I think... I might need your help."

[salmalin]

I Wanna Talk About "Comments"

IMG ID: Yknow go figure you’d abandon this for a popular fandom… goes to show you just write for attention and instant gratification. May as well just delete this. It’s clogging up space. To do all this and walk away for mainstream games is so typical for people like you who claim to be in it for the art. You’re in it for the ratio, you’re in it for your massive ego, so just delete it.

I've been getting a few comments like this lately, and this one is honestly the least biting, but I've been seeing enough of them that I've decided to post this.

I've already deleted this "Named" Anon Comment off the fic, and I'm not going to reply to them, but I wanted to take a moment to talk about this mentality, and why comments like this make no sense.

Basically: They're angry that I'm taking a break from this fic from a small fandom—a fic they've never interacted with—while I'm also writing another story for another fandom that happens to be bigger. This bigger fandom fic has (despite being in first-person with a non-linear storytelling style, famously hated formats) gained a bit of attention. Which is fine. That happens.

So let's talk about why this comment sucks, and why it fails at every level to be any form of criticism, constructive or otherwise.

"abandon this for a popular fandom" Everyone can see that this fic is marked as incomplete. Whoever this is, they chose to click on an incomplete fic that hasn't been updated in eight months—only eight months. A drop in the bucket, really, and the time I went between chapter 5 and chapter 6 was over a year. This is on them. They do not get to put this on the writer. At any point they could have stopped. At any point, they could have closed the fic. They knew this from the get-go. They did not. This was their decision, and they're trying to blame me for their despair. They made it through 245k before they reached this point, and I know because they commented on the last chapter specifically.

"you just write for attention and instant gratification" "Instant"? I don't think this person knows how writing works. Like, on a fundamental level. This story started getting posted in 2020, with my most recent update this year (2023), and they think writing and posting something is looking for "instant gratification". Bold to assume this is "instant". (Bold to assume we have any control over it at all.)

"May as well delete this. It's clogging up space." AO3 is only limited by its server size, and my fic is a drop in the bucket. It is not taking up much in the way of space. Besides, just because something is unfinished does not mean it doesn't belong on AO3. That's why you're allowed to upload chapter by chapter. That is a critical function of the website. It's also an archive, which means it's designed to hold information, finished or unfinished. Again, shame on the reader.

"You're in it for the ratio; you're in it for your massive ego." These are not only assumptions, but if this person is really so opposed to the idea of people doing things for attention, they should ignore children when they need food, only read published novels that are obviously written in a desperate grab for money, and never go on AO3 ever again. If writers didn't want attention, they wouldn't post online for free because they'd just keep it to themselves. And if commenters didn't want attention, they wouldn't comment. (But then would we even have a fandom, if no one's talking to anyone else?) Is this the attention they wanted? Probably. I've found that people like this seem to thrive on the misery they inflict on others.

If y'all care to know why this person was so abysmally wrong in this specific context: (if not, just skip to the end of the list.)

This fic that they're complaining I left for a bigger fandom? I actually left that bigger fandom for this fic. That "bigger fandom" was the first video game I was ever obsessed with. It was 1997, and I wasn't even allowed to touch the console. My brother destroyed the final disc in a fit of rage. I've never even beaten the final boss. It has been 26 years, and for a solid 15 of them I was desperately trying to figure out what I wanted to write for the pairing that changed my life. This fic that they're complaining about me "abandoning" Fires of War for has been rolling around in my brain for longer than the media for Fires of War has even existed. In fact, when you search my username here on tumblr, an ask I sent another user laying this out is essentially the first thing you see. (At least, right now.) In fact, my current user pic is from Fires of War. I did not change it because there's no need to.

Fires of War is actually still in progress, and they would have known this if they read the other comments on the same chapter they complained on. I originally took a break from FoW due to stress, and because no matter what I tried, the next chapter just wasn't working. After a break, I realized why—the outline was broken and needed to be adjusted. Meanwhile, the other fic I'm working on to relieve that stress is much, much easier to write. In my eyes, it's much lower quality, as well. It requires fewer stages of editing. The words flow easily because they're much closer to my speaking voice. I'm not constantly researching cultures I know little about for fact checking and world building and (I shit you not) intercontinental politics. (I once researched the GDP, climate, and economy of Spain in 1986 for several hours and proceeded to have a three hour debate with my editor about a plot point. Yes. Three hours.) Oh, and I don't have to write anything in Iambic Fucking Pentameter. (Yes, that's a thing in Fires of War. They are complaining that I "abandoned" a story that has bits of dialog in god-forsaken Iambic Pentameter. Even at my peak, I wrote 8k in two weeks. But with my current "popular" fic, I can whip out 14k in one. That's how much easier it is.)

I want to turn those "ratio" stats off. I've mentioned this to people a few times, actually—I wish there was a way to turn all stats off on the Archive. They actually give me anxiety. I don't want to know how many comments are on my fic, or kudos are on a little obscure piece. I think that information should only be accessible to the writer, like Tumblr follow counts.

Literally talk to me for three seconds and you will be sick of how into the art of it I am. Holy shit, I cannot shut up. I will include required reading. I will rant about the details I put in for plotlines ten chapters out. I will give you a crash course in tone, word choice, and counting verbs. And yes, I count verbs! Holy fuck I am autistic as hell and this is my special interest. I love writing so much. It's my favorite thing in the world. Please stop my I CAN'T STOP I LOVE WRITING SO MUCH GOD IT'S THE ONLY THING THAT KEEPS ME FUCKING SANE. So you can imagine how misguided I think someone is when they say I'm not into the art of it. It just exposes them as someone who doesn't know what art is.

I'm a hermit who doesn't really go online much aside from using Discord as a free texting app because for some reason every texting app I've gotten has been broken. I legit do not like attention. I talk to like four people a day outside of work. I don't even like it when people complement me too much. Even if I went above and beyond, just one sentence is more than enough and move on, please. It's good to know my actions have had positive consequences, because that's crucial for my brain processing said consequences so I can continue said action in the future because I know I didn't do something wrong, but repeated praise makes me uncomfortable. It took me a long time to understand this about myself. This seems antithetical at first, but I do like the comments that break down the themes, execution, etc. in my fics. If they're breaking things down, moving to point to point about parts they enjoyed, there are giving me critical feedback. They tell me what thy enjoyed, and what was picked up. It's extremely useful feedback to know what they enjoyed, and what stood out to them. It helps me write better stories on the future, and hones how I get my point across. Besides, what is art that doesn't spark innovation and thought? It is forgotten.

The strongest hate is born of love—misguided though it may be—and this person has made that clear. Obviously they care about this fandom or they never would have commented like this. But if they knew more about people and less about what they want everyone to give them, maybe the spaces around them would be safer for the people in their lives—or the people they brush against online.

Comments like this often make people not want to write their fic.

Thankfully, I'm actually am in it for the art, so they might be going out of their way to make the lives of everyone around them miserable, but they haven't achieved their goal here.

However, there are a lot of writers who critically need feedback; who need this positive reinforcement. It's also why it's so important to tell writers why you enjoy their work. Even if it's something small like "I like your word choice" or "I really liked this line" or "I can't wait to find out how they resolve this"—that's feedback more valuable than we can really quantify.

"I like your word choice."—The way you pay attention to the words you use is working with the tone.

"I really like this line."—The way this line is formatted is very memorable and hits better than the others. It may be good to pay attention to it to find out why.

"I can't wait to find out how they resolve this."—You have gotten a good grade in suspense, a thing that is possible and reasonable to achieve (or however that meme goes).

I am constantly learning. I am constantly growing and changing as a person and a writer, and other people are critical to this. Sitting in a room and shouting will not make you better at making jokes, and shoving your writing in a corner never to see the light of day will never give you the tools to communicate with other people.

Sometimes I feel like people like this *points to the top of the page* don't want to learn that lesson, because of the painful reckoning with their actions it will entail.

If this is you, or you have done something similar, I recommend going through, finding your old comments, and deleting them yourself, or even apologizing if you can. Clean up your own mess, so people like me don't have to do it for you. This is a public space. Act like it.

[deidremercer]

Oh yeah I might as well post this here for the 2 people who follow me and aren't already in discords with me,

I'm doing this:

In an attempt to improve my art, I started out just doing it for the sake of drawing something almost every day but now I think I'm gonna save these for whenever I feel I've made an improvement. Each day I am doing a different OC and I'm trying to lean towards having each character in an outfit I wouldn't normally draw them in

#1 was done with Orpheus Valor from Paragons

He was pretty fun to draw because I don't do masc characters very often. Also doing him for the underwear post was good because my GM, Gracie, and I had previously joked about him having scars where top surgery scars would be and just fully not being trans (there are other trans characters in Paragons I feel like we get to do a little bit of queerbaiting) so he was mauled by a bear.

#2 was done with Rabbit Leporidae from Thyrasylo.

Rabbit is normally dressed in either a suit or a frilly dress despite the fact that her name stems from the fact that her original design was wearing a bunny suit. Her shirt is a gag stolen from Thrilling Intent, I think it's funny for the most powerful spellcaster in my world to be wearing a spelling bee shirt. This was also cool because I got to draw her tattoos. Neither of her previous tokens really showed them off much so I thought I could use this opportunity to draw them. They don't have any real significance as of right now but I might ascribe some to them later.

#3 is with Ivy Blackleaf from Thyrasylo

Ivy is very fun to draw, this prompt made me finally design a logo for her Mom's cafe. I think I made it a little too close to the Olive Garden logo. Otherwise this was a fairly straightforward one, I did get to practice expression a little bit.

#4 with Roxanne De'Rulo from Crescent King

Messy hair Roxie is really fun to draw. I forced myself to make this a full body to try and practice feet, I don't think they look all that great. Her hand is a little bit fucked up but I am glad that I drew it at all, practice is important. Otherwise the only thing of note with this one is that I lost the original TRIPWIRE band logo and Redbubble doesnt let you redownload your uploaded designs which kinda blows.

#5 with Jayden Valekrave from Paranoia and Evi Halloran from Macrocosmos

The first one with a backdrop. This one was also voted on by a whole 37 people who took time out of their day to vote on my silly little Google form. Evi is in the background because she was the runner up and I probably wouldn't draw her anywhere else. I also think I didn't do justice to all the people who voted for Jayden. I super didn't have a reference pulled up and I am not skilled enough to draw from my imagination yet. Jayden's halberd, Dawnbreaker, having sunglasses on is the best part of this image. She is so silly. I also started drawing the eyes without having lineart on them here. Idk how I like it, we'll have to see.

#6 with Vernidaius Yxerei from Decent Into Avernus

Compression kinda fucked this one up a bit, but the name of the game with this one was experimenting with brushes. I kinda tried to get some of the texture that I really love out of Jackson FrameDodge of The3rdWheel's work. Unfortunately I dont really know how to shade properly so it's kinda all over the place, and harder to see on the skin, oops. This one had a pose reference initially but the legs ended up being too difficult for me to do so I just sorta covered one of them. I also super forgot to draw Vermi's scales here. The line-less eyes are still something I'm on the fence about. I think this background is a good bit better than the previous one, the only part of the previous one that I really ended up liking is the clouds.

And that's everything I've done so far, tune in soon for the next one if you care.

[dausy]

I never uploaded here, the other week I uploaded this. Some weeks ago, Grabie reached out to me and sent me some of their art products to review. Which was super cool. I am so thankful that so many companies have found me to let me try stuff. Lord knows I dont have a big following, I just really enjoy hoarding art supplies. It is just like the coolest thing ever this day and age to receive stuff like that via the internet. My hobbyist self is so thankful.

I just haven't felt like turning the internet on recently. I skipped this last week uploading to youtube and part of that was I just didn't feel like it but the other part was I worked a lot these past 2 weeks even though I put my foot down and said I wouldn't pick up extra anymore..I did end up picking up extra. Also, I had to do some boring adult chores and phone calls all that just takes so much time and effort.

I had to take my dog to the vet for her annual stuff last week and I would have rather have gone to the dentist for myself twice than do that again lol. I liked my old vet before we moved and I didn't jive with this place. Then on the way home my car started giving me funky warnings. So I had to take it to the shop. They told me a lot needed to be fixed which was already a fortune on top of paying for the dogs stuff. This is annoying but murphy's law states that if your spouse is gone for work, everything breaks. So I was already waiting for things to break and already had money set aside for when these events finally occur. So I had to spend half my day at this car place because I'm alone and have nobody to chauffeur me around. That zaps your energy.

My blessed coworkers were super sweet though when I told them about my car ordeal. They demanded to see my receipts and car (like they were physically at my car after work) and told me to never spend money like this without referring to them first because I probably got ripped off and they were concerned about my gullible-ness and lack of car education. I actually thought this was a really nice gesture. I didn't know that I could use coworkers as this sort of reference and I probably still wont. But nice people.

we had an accreditation survey at work. And I'm overly loud and oversharing of all things. They probably should have locked me away somewhere. I don't know why they allowed me on the premises during this survey or why I've grown this way as I've gotten older. The place I work is pretty sketch as it is.

Also got a concerning phone call from my spouse about a health incident re my MIL and I thought I was going to have to drive to Arizona for a minute. Everything is fine I think.

otherwise I just work, run home and turn on Disney Dreamlight Valley. Its kinda sad. I'm kinda tired. I have a terrible headcold too. I had to sleep last night with a paper towel tied to my face because face juice just kept leaking out uncontrollably.

[cwarscars]

What kind of media provides inspiration for your muse (movies, music, comics, books, research)? How often do you try to search out new sources of inspiration, or does it happen more organically? How do you start drafting a reply- does it start with a concept, a phrase, or quote?

ASK ANYTHING YOU’D LIKE ABOUT MY CHARACTERIZATION OR HOW I PLAY MY CHARACTER.

( im SO SORRY i waffled but also, like - that first question in particular is really great and i've had such fun answering it! it has a lot of detail about my heid i think & i hope it makes some sense ! )

What kind of media provides inspiration for your muse (movies, music, comics, books, research)?

aw man, i am hugely inspired by films. primarily because i'm a total film fan ( me and my partner met studying film and he's, like, super into them ) - there are so many magnificent stories out there told on film & so many classics that i would implore people to watch as a means to get a grasp of certain subject matter or attitudes or even just story inspirations?

when it comes to heid; obviously i'm inspired a lot by war films ( one of my favourite genres actually ! ) - but, heid is a tough cookie because i sort of try to write him as being a mixture of 'war is hell' and 'i love war.' i see him a lot as being like colonel kilgore from apocalypse now ( if you've not seen it, i'm sure you know the 'i love the smell of napalm in the morning' ) but more-so, sergaent barnes from platoon.

platoon is actually one of my all-time-favourite films and barnes is VERY heid.

there's one scene in particular that resonates so hard with my portrayal ( or at least, how i hope to portray heid and it's here ). but it's where i get the quote from in my blog / carrd.

"Now, I got no fight with any man who does what he's told, but when he don't, the machine breaks down. And when the machine breaks down, we break down. And I ain't gonna allow that in any of you. Not one."

otherwise ( and in terms of war films ) - i take inspiration from rambo and the rant that he has during that film. this is more for young heidegger than it is older. like, i headcanon he essentially had a break down in his mid 20s and THIS is very much what it was like.

"Nothing is over! Nothing! You just don't turn it off! It wasn't my war! You asked me, I didn't ask you! And I did what I had to do to win! But somebody wouldn't let us win! And I come back to the world and I see all those maggots at the airport, protesting me, spitting. Calling me baby killer and all kinds of vile crap! Who are they to protest me? Who are they? Unless they've been me and been there and know what the hell they're yelling about!"

also, as a side-note ; the part where he sits on the floor sobbing saying 'where are they all?', 'where are they?' - that fucking hits /hard/ and just, urgh. i'd seriously say watch the entire scene because it's so sad but exactly how i see heid as a young guy and is partially why he's so fucking mean now. ( it's also why i want to explore young heid so badly )

another thing i wanted to mention are the samurai films i've been watching. i haven't watched a lot and most focus on samurai being good / or at least morally grey. but sword of doom really resonated with my portrayal; primarily because the lead is essentially seen as a walking sword of death ( he's despised by like, everybody and isn't a particularly nice person ). there's a scene where he witnesses a master swordsman cut down his entire crew and he just stands there half in awe and half in fear.

i read somebody suggest that the lead character is sadistic and essentially, his sword is his penis - to see somebody 'outperform him' & thus have him scared, renders him impotent.

it really resonated with how i see heid & i know that might sound silly but i love the idea of that being how he was first introduced to godo. the scene can be found here ( warning; blood / i uploaded the clip just for this lol )

& on the same note as 'sword of doom' - the scene at the end ( spoiler ) features the lead essentially go on an insane rampage fuelled by being literally haunted by the people he's killed & urgh, i could just /see/ that happening to heid.

How often do you try to search out new sources of inspiration, or does it happen more organically?

it tends to happen more organically - though i do love watching new films for inspiration! i like to seek out war films, samurai films, films with older casts. i've also been delving into a lot of the more classical kinda of films now, too! like, i watched casablanca not long ago and loved that! i see those films as being kind of heid-y. not necessarily in mood but like, i couldn't compare him to a modern flick ( if that makes any degree of sense ).

How do you start drafting a reply- does it start with a concept, a phrase, or quote?

when it comes to a thread reply; i try my best to make the response as natural as possible. like, if the other character is doing a variety of things - i'll have heid respond in a way that feels natural, rather than a step by step process of answering each sentence written.

when it comes to writing a starter or an ask - i'll usually type up heid's initial dialogue and then let the words flow from there. generally, once i get an idea / concept; i can flow pretty well - im a total 'wing it' kinda person.

[meticulac]

Looking Back on a Game Jam Attempt that I Fumbled Pretty Hard

I'll just list a few things I remember from trying to make a game for the Hawktober Horrors 2024 game jam. It didn't become an entry both because I ended up slightly late to submit and because I did not have much of a game to show anyway: Feel free to download it from the link above, it's a few minutes of very glitchy Pacman-like gameplay and also you have to manually close and restart the game every time your character dies. I guess I should upload the slightly updated version I made a few days later sometime, where it at least resets on its own after a few seconds, but I'd like to make some other improvements before I do that, like adding a title screen, more than one level, and stuff like that.

I'll also want to try and fix the weird bug causing the enemy character The Decider to navigate weird, which will probably require learning GameMaker better. I'm also thinking of trying to implement the game in another system, probably LowRes NX since it's likely to fit the limitations of that anyway. However, that brings me to an issue that messed up the first part of my attempt at making this game, which was using uncertainty on what type of game to make and what tools to use leading me to procrastinate on actually making the game.

So, first, I had look up the jam and accidentally ran into a previous year's version, so I came up with an idea that didn't really fit the movie trope theme of this year's jam. I don't want to go into detail on what I came up with then, mostly because I used an idea I had for a tabletop game quest and now I figure I'll put it back to using it that way.

Anyway, after I found the right page I took a while to decide on making a heist game with Pacman-like navigation, but then I took a long time deciding what to make it with. I was toying with Bitmello recently, but, and the jam recommended making a downloadable games as preferable over web based ones, which also meant I wouldn't be using MicroStudio or plain Javascript. For a bit I considered using Amulet, but that was a bit barebones for me to teach myself and then use to throw together something for a game jam in a few weeks. After that I looked at Lowres NX and Homegirl Pro, both of which seemed promising, but I wasn't sure if making it so you need to download a separate player and use that to load the game might be too fiddly for game jam purposes.

Regardless, I think picking any of them quickly would have left me in a better position than waiting, to give me more time to learn the ins and outs of the system and actually get something made. When I did choose GameMaker, it was so long since I last used it that I didn't even know how to make tile collisions, so currently there's just a single block object for all the walls. I could have at least made them invisible and put them over tiles to make the walls look nice, but I was spending a bunch of time trying to make the movement controls working right.

Specifically, I was trying to get movement working like in Pac-Man, where if you try to turn toward a wall you're running along, you keep going forward until you reach a corner int hat direction. It can feel pretty nice to do that once you're used to it, since it lets you anticipate where you're trying to go instead of having to get your timing just right. Anyway, Game Maker is not really designed to do that, so it was a hard to get it just right to where your character deters a wall to the side of itself without just getting stuck on it.

I got it sort of working, but only if you were already on the side of the hallway you were trying to turn towards, otherwise you would turn and move a few pixels forward before hitting the opposite wall. I probably should have left it at that, because my effort to make it perfect just took so much time I ended up taking the whole thing out instead of even rolling it back and making the simplest possible collision I could just to have time to actually make the rest of the game, hastily tossing in the enemy character, collectable gems, the exit, and Game Over/Win screens. The enemy navigation is not great because I didn't get it to detect when it's in the middle of a tile, so instead I have it only turn when hitting a wall, and of course some parts of the level arbitrarily prevent it from turning in certain directions properly for reasons I still don't understand.

Maybe I should have stuck to placing a bunch of one-tile blocks instead of stretching them, I have no idea if stretched objects have weird collision or not. Anyway, it's neat that for gems I could just have them randomly tint themselves so easily, and of course I'd like to learn from all this to make a future games more diligently and with and eye to keeping on schedule, preferably using something I'm already familiar with when I decide to enter something with a time limit and not overthink things too much once I do start.

[thefirstknife]

Additional stuff because I finally got through the whole quest and got all the lore from the dungeon! I'll put it also under read more:

The final three lore dialogues are super interesting in relation to the stuff about Fikrul so I'll transcribe them in full. First of the batch:

Crow: "Uldren had history with the House of Kings. That's what led to the Scorn in the first place." Petra: "I'm familiar with your history, but the banners here are ancient." Crow: "Like from the Dark Age? You know that Warlord - the skull promised her anything she wanted. She offered that promise to surrounding villages. For tribute, of course - brokered their wishes and protected them against consequences. Naeem's reputation spread, until... any guesses, Petra?" Petra: "She drew attention form the House of Kings, who coveted this power."

This summarises the lore from the Ghost shell and adds some stuff. Like the House of Kings banners that appear all around the castle. Crow and Petra explain that Naeem's bargain with Hefnd brought the Kings to the castle. One of the dialogues before these final three also explains that once Kings came to the castle, Naeem did not survive, but that with her final breath "she wished ruin on their House, that 'her vengeance follow them into the grave'."

The second dialogue:

Crow: "This all feels... personal. Uldren links to the Kings, both link to Fikrul. My one dangling thread." Petra: "Step back from yourself. New Scorn rising drew Fikrul's attention... Kings, no less. What if this was a diplomatic envoy? The Witness's Scorn are empty flesh made weapons. But the Scorn here appear to express a crude culture." Crow: "Fikrul's followers have always been different... capable of learning. Maybe he saw that potential here." Petra: "Then maybe you can still get through to him."

This was also hinted at in the lore tab for the exotic weapon I posted earlier in this post, but this is some extra stuff and it's truly wild. And super interesting. I am very much hoping that this is setup to Crow reaching out to Fikrul. The revelation that Fikrul does not like the Witness and isn't working with it is incredible. And third dialogue:

Crow: "This has to be the castle from Saladin't story. The Scorn have to be Kings. It's the only thing that makes sense. Hefnd was buried here since the Dark Age, but the instant he could, he lured the Taken in... Poisoned himself, feeding off their ties to the Darkness, their want. He found a loophole to raise the Kings into Scorn and enact his friend's dying wish for revenge." Petra: "Holding onto that anger for what... centuries? Just to destroy itself with Taken corruption - of course. Vengeance is an ouroboros. And everything cyclical is doomed to destroy itself, eventually."

This gets us back to the whole story. Naeem died to Kings and wished for their ruin that would follow them into the grave. Hefnd used that wish to turn them into Scorn. These Scorn drew attention of Fikrul, who wants the Scorn to rally around him so that they wouldn't be killed or influenced by Darkness. And now we were sent here to clean up the whole mess and end the cycle of violence, release Hefnd from the wish of vengeance and let him rest.

At the end of the quest there's one more dialogue. You get teleported to a special room with Hefnd's skull and Hefnd tells us a little bit more by using... Shaxx! Because after all Shaxx IS involved here: he was the Warlord who killed Hefnd in the first place and told Naeem about this castle. I did think that Shaxx may have been that Warlord, but mostly just because we've been thinking the dungeon might have something to do with him. It could've been anyone really. There was nothing pointing to him otherwise. But it's Shaxx and we get lines from him at the end, which I will transcribe (DLV doesn't have any dialogues from this uploaded yet):

Petra: "Something is different about this one..." Shaxx: "And so, the Great HUnt claims the life of another Ahamkara. You slew me 14 times, Wish Dragon. I landed a killing blow only once. Hardly seems fair. They say that to draw a weapon against one of your kind is to wish for victory. Even if the beast is slain, the wish is granted. The dragon wins either way. Perhaps that's why they send me on these hunts. Because... I do not wish to do this. The Ahamkara are a force of nature. To blame you for an ill-conceived wish is like blaming fire for burning down a house. And yet, when a fire rages out of control, it must be extinguished. There is no joy... or ambition in it. Only the knowledge that it must be done. Rest well, dragon. Let this castle be your tomb, one befitting a creature of your stature. That is the closest thing to a wish you'll get from me. Crow: "Shaxx is the other Warlord?" Petra: "Saladin never mentioned that? It's sweet, in a way. That this is the way Hefnd chose to speak to us." Crow: "Well, Hefnd, I'm sure the Guardian found you a worthy opponent too. We were glad to hear your story. Who wants to ask Shaxx about this?"

Feeling feelings and things about an Ahamkara who bonded with a Guardian and about Shaxx and about everything that happened here.

Dungeon is really good! I'm enjoying it immensely! Everyone in the mood for some fantasy ACTUAL dungeon crawling DnD style will love it! Beautiful location, really fun encounters that feel WAY more fair and approachable than many other dungeons and some incredibly cool lore.

The way you collect lore is also interesting; you can't just get in and grab what you need to understand everything, it's tied to a quest that requires multiple runs. This may be annoying if you don't have your own fireteam, but it's a really nice way to experiment with lore delivery; with each clear you continue a quest and can search for hidden rooms and then inside you get a collectible and can listen to dialogue that is explaining the stuff about the dungeon. The only lore tabs are on the exotic weapon and the exotic Ghost shell; everything else is dialogues to listen to. I'll put the lore tabs below and also add some stuff that I've learned so far. I'm missing final three dialogues as it takes some time to collect everything for the quest. Spoilers under:

First of all, the speculation was wrong! Nobody was correct! The castle isn't Shaxx's and Shaxx wasn't involved and he's not on comms. Strange, but I personally don't mind it that much. The dungeon is led by Petra and Crow, mostly because it's focused on an Ahamkara. The setup is that Scorn were detected on Earth where they haven't been before and then it's discovered that they were drawn to an old Dark Age castle that used to be owned by a Warlord. This Warlord is a new character called Naeem and she lived there with an Ahamkara (Hefnd) with whom she struck a deal with.

The Ghost Shell (Zira's Shell, I assume Zira was the name of Naeem's Ghost) explains that another Warlord killed Hefnd and then told Naeem about the whereabouts of its bones and she went there and claimed the castle and the Ahamkara. She made a deal with the Ahamkara to feed on her, infinitely (because she can just keep dying over and over), instead of making other people suffer for the wishes they make. So like if someone makes a wish with Hefnd, the backfire should go to Naeem. Hefnd agreed. Super interesting insight into Ahamkara. While super grim, it shows that Ahamkara are capable of partnership with people instead of just messing with them for no reason.

The Scorn are interesting because the first boss is called Rathil, First Broken Knight of Fikrul. In one of the lore dialogues, Petra and Crow also discuss Fikrul and it's finally explained that he simply vanished from the Reef and nobody knows where he went. So this is some really interesting setup going on right now, which makes sense given that the second episode is going to be about him (barring any changes in schedule and plans ofc). Furthermore, Fikrul is featured on the lore for the exotic weapon from the dungeon and it's the first and most comprehensive answer to the question of where he is and what he is doing. And it's kinda sad ngl! Rathil was a Scorn guy he called "son" and tasked with bringing back Scorn from Earth because he didn't want Darkness to "claim them." I assume that refers to taking. It's interesting because it would mean that Fikrul is not very fond of the Witness and isn't working with/for it. Speculation for now, but that's how it read. The first dungeon boss and some of the enemies needed to activate damage phases are all Fikrul's guys from the lore tab.

The final boss is a chimaera manifested by Hefnd and we defeat it, but the bones remain and they're being siphoned by Taken energy. The Taken appear half-way through the dungeon and it's unclear what they're doing and why they want the Ahamkara. Perhaps to prevent us from messing with Ahamkara to get through the portal? I assume the Witness would know that Ahamkara could help us follow it, so some sort of contingency plan. Super excited to continue playing tomorrow and get the last three dialogues. Really loving the Fikrul update. It feels so good to know that they're laying the groundwork for the hinted episode that will feature him.

Zira's Shell lore tab:

Buried Bloodline lore tab (exotic sidearm):

[kiruamon]

Would you like to watch the meteor shower with me?

Based on one of the Monster Camp routes, where I failed miserably several times at the end, I wrote a fanfiction. Sooooooo I started to write an Oz x Damien story based on the event where you try to fool Damien's parents into thinking you are in a relationship with their son. Since English is not my native language it will take some time to finish translating the story, but! Since I already translated 8 out of 27 pages, I thought I could at least upload a little sneak peek here on Tumblr. So hopefully you have fun with the first three pages!

I translate most of my texts with the help of DeepL. It is a translation program. Just wanted to let you know. Okay, okay, but now let's start for real!:)

_

"YOU and ME at the meteor shower? After you've ruined everything? Forget it loser!"

Quite obviously, Damien was still mad at him. It struck him as extremely unfair at that. After all, his angry crush had dragged him into his family affairs and the web of lies that had been created in the process, not the other way around. Oz had certainly never claimed to know anything about neurosurgery.

"You made me look stupid in front of my dads! I had to listen to a hill of questions!"

Oz was relatively sure that Damien didn't mean hill but ton, but refrained from pointing this out to the already upset demon. He should have known it would turn out that way when he asked Damien if they wanted to watch the meteor shower together tomorrow night. Now Oz regretted even more having summoned up his courage to approach his annoyed friend about it. He had hoped that maybe Damien would overlook this one annoyance, especially since they used to have so much fun together the days before here at camp and also at school. Silly hopes, which were now torn apart in the air, like an unwanted love letter. The shadowy monster tried to endure it. Damien, still cursing and angry, circled in front of him, kicking the trunk of a tall tree several times until it finally fell. Oz tried to suppress the trembling of his hands. As it seemed, only he had believed that they had really become friends. But Damien's reaction and words were enough for him to understand how wrong he had been. His little phobias huddled insecurely on his arm and shoulder, watching Damien with a hurt expression on their tiny faces as he gestured furiously with his arms in the air. Oz felt the same way as they did. He dropped his shoulders, his thoughts already about to spiral downward as he gave himself a push. No. No! He couldn't let his head hang down. He had not done anything wrong! And just because he liked Damien - a lot, in fact - he wasn't going to let Damien put all the responsibility on him alone. Enough was enough. And he definitely had enough of it! So the personification of fear mustered his courage a second time that evening to confront his crush. Something he would never have done so directly otherwise.

"D-don't you think lying to your p-parents was n-not exactly the best idea in the first place?" Oz tried to keep his voice steady. So he wouldn't stutter too much. While he didn't completely succeed, at least he got Damien's attention with it. This was probably due to the fact that his words went straight into the other’s head, so he had to listen to him either way. The golden eyes fixed him with a piercing look. Fortunately, Damien's looks weren't deadly. Unlike many other things the demon could do to one. Oz forced himself to keep talking nonetheless. As long as he could before Damien might attack him. "I mean, they w-were incredibly nice, and i-if I'm honest, I didn't like lying t-to them in the first place." His stuttering increased. He could still feel his guilty conscience gnawing at him. While at first they had seemed so intimidating, Damien's fathers had treated him so kindly.... A bone-chilling roar as loud as that of a wild beast abruptly silenced him.

"Uuuuuuuaaargh! Shut up, noob! You have absolutely no idea what it's like to be embarrassed in front of your parents!" In a blind rage and without even thinking for a second about his words, Damien tossed all his frustration at the monster who had so often helped him with his various problems. Oz literally flinched before him. It was as if Damien had just physically punched the lanky monster in the face. There was a pain in the round white eyes of his counterpart that went beyond any physical agony. Damien himself was a little surprised by this, but still far too upset to give it much thought. When the voice of the inconspicuous monster entered his head this time, it sounded very quiet and downright broken.

"T-true. I-I...d-don't know what it's like...t-to have parents," trying to say each word out loud stressed him out horribly and made his chest ache. He would never know what it was like to have parents who loved one, let alone what it felt like to have parents at all. Meeting Damien's parents had been special for Oz. To be accepted by them - even if under false pretenses - and welcomed into their little circle. It was as if he had been allowed to step through a door for a short time to take a look into a world that was normally locked away from him. Oz's phobias became even smaller, some even retreating into his innermost being to escape this conversation. He could no longer manage to look Damien straight in the face. It hurt too much that Damien, of all people, was holding this very thing against him. Oz understood that there was no point in talking to the angry school bully about this any longer. His body was already shaking like crazy. The pressure was too much and would eventually crush him. Somehow, he just managed to utter one last plea before his voice failed him completely. "T-tell them... a-at least... t-that... I'm very s-sorry for... l-lying to them... " As soon as he finished his sentence, Oz disappeared, swallowed by the surrounding shadows.

"Hey! Fuckin' wait!" Too late. By the time Damien broke free of his stupor, it was too late. Oz had made a run for it. The noob could be anywhere now thanks to his stupid shadow teleportation. "Bloody hell!" Damien felt it rumbling inside him. To the feelings of anger and frustration which had burned so brightly until just now, another was being mixed in. One that he felt very, very rarely and that he couldn't stand for the life of him. Remorse. Bitterly it spread in his mouth, ran down his throat and made his guts clench violently. It slammed its nasty, sharp claws, like a mountain lion on the rampage, so deep into his chest that it took away the air he needed to breathe and slowly suffocating all other emotions in him. But it came too late. The damage was already done and Oz was no longer here. "Fuck." Damien didn't know what to do. And this time he couldn't ask Oz to solve his problem for him.

He felt sick. So terribly sick. From the shadows of the surrounding trees, Oz stepped out into the area lit by the campfire. Several of his classmates were fooling around with each other, sitting on logs around the warmth-giving fire. They were drinking, making plans for tomorrow, eating s'mores, laughing, and arguing with each other or trying to win the attention of those to which their hearts belonged. Oz didn't feel like joining them. Not after what had happened. He barely managed to keep himself on his feet. With some difficulty he forced himself to walk upright, past the others. He only took a quick glance at the faces of the gathered monsters. Of course, his friends noticed him. He waved at them weakly, and with a small gesture of his hands, told them he was going to lie down for the day, before stumbling hastily over to the tents. It took him two tries to grab the zipper of his tent without it slipping out of his fingers again since they were shaking so badly. When he finally opened it and crawled inside, this time, thankfully, one of his little phobias closed the entrance of the lemon yellow tent for him. Without changing clothes or anything, completely exhausted, Oz dropped onto the camping mat lying on the ground, which provided some comfort with a pillow and a blanket. Logophobia and Algophobia helped him out of his shoes, which fell dully to the ground at the foot of the mat. The little phobias then moved up his legs, over his side to his shoulder where they snuggled close to his neck with a soft sniff. His fingers instinctively reached for his yellow, gray and white striped, cuddly blanket under which he disappeared completely moments later - as if he could shield himself from the rest of the world like this. He wanted to see no one now, hear no one and talk no more. There was no strength or will in him to do so. Instead, he was letting free the long overdue tears he held back since his conversation with Damien. As well as the disappointment, which had hit him like a bullet in the heart when he realized how little he must mean to the horned demon. Admitting this to himself still hurt like crazy. Worse than any pain he had ever felt in all the billions of years since his existence. Falling into a lava pit was laughable in comparison. Not that he felt like laughing. He pulled the cloth even tighter around him and his little phobias. Seeking for a bit of comfort, the personification of fear bent his knees close to his chest, wrapped his long, slender arms around his legs and tried somehow to become as small as possible in his current form.

[sims2-21b]

Okay so let's talk about paid Sims 4 custom content, shall we?

I've noticed recently that a disturbing amount of players that use custom content aren't actually aware that locking custom content behind a paywall is in fact illegal. And because people don't know, those creators get away with it and make us believe we're bound to ridiculous terms of use they set for the stuff they create.

There's multiple issues I have here, but let's start with paywalled CC, let's see what EA has to say:

You can fact check this here:(https://forums.thesims.com/en_US/discussion/comment/16175450/#Comment_16175450)

In short, locking custom content pieces behind a paywall is forbidden unless it's early access and it's made available to download for free after 3 weeks max. Paywalling content for any longer is just flat out illegal, end of story.

Therefore if you do come across cc that's been paywalled for longer than that, you're not breaking the law in any way shape or form if you download those items from other sources (there are a handful of websites that provide paywalled content for free) and you shouldn't feel bad about it considering they are breaking the law by withholding the content unless you pay.

Now that we've covered that, let's look at TOUs. Yes, I understand people put work into original meshes, lots of work, the issue is - let's look into what EA says again (you can (and I actually encourage you to) fact check this for yourself in EAs terms of service) :

*UGC=USER GENERATED CONTENT

When you contribute UGC*, you grant to EA, its licensors and licensees a non-exclusive, perpetual, transferable, worldwide, sublicensable license to use, host, store, reproduce, modify, create derivative works, publicly perform, publicly display or otherwise transmit and communicate the UGC, or any portion of it, in any manner or form and in any medium or forum, whether now known or later devised, without notice, payment or attribution of any kind to you or any third party. You also grant to all other users who can access and use your UGC on an EA Service the right to use, copy, modify, display, perform, create derivative works from, and otherwise communicate and distribute your UGC on or through the relevant EA Service without further notice, attribution or compensation to you.

Simply put, when a creator uploads cc, you're free to use it in whatever way you want. The moment they use the game engine/in game items to create custom content - which applies to any CC piece out there - they sign over all rights to EA. This means that the CC creators terms of use do NOT matter whatsoever, EA makes the rules here.

Of course claiming other people's work as yours is still a shitty thing to do and you shouldn't do it, no question, but you're well within your rights to upload cc items with your builds or Sims instead of linking any individual cc item, you can recolour anything you want and put it online for others to use, edit meshes and whatever else people try to forbid you to do with it.

If you look further into this yourself you'll hear the argument thrown around that this only applies to the in game gallery as it says "users who can access your content on an EA service", except it says access or USE on an EA service. Wording, very important in the world of contracts. The game is an EA service, therefore every single cc or mod ever made is used on an EA service, therefore this applies to all CC.

Again, you should always state that you used this or that creator's item as a base for yours, that's just human decency, but they can't forbid you to use the items they share online for people to download.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying don't support CC creators, there's software they use that's expensive, they take time out of their day and custom content and mods improve the game so much, but you should support creators on a voluntary basis to show your appreciation for their work, not because you wouldn't be able to otherwise access the content.

That's that, but there's another whole different pet peeve I have, the audacity of some creators to copy brand items, like Nike, Gucci, Apple etc and then paywall those PLAGIARIZED objects and/or say in their TOU that you aren't allowed to use those objects for own creations, while they themselves stole them. Yes, sure they put in work and recreated them as 3D objects, but it's not their property.

Think about it, you don't make a painting your own just because you redraw it digitally. Yes that takes effort, but it doesn't make you the owner of the original work and I hardly doubt CC creators have official brand deals set up with those companies.

That's my take on it, but I strongly encourage anyone who uses custom content to inform themselves about the legal situation instead of playing along the rules of CC creators that abuse the community for profit.

Sims custom content used to be from players for players and just to make the game more fun. It's becoming more and more of a money scheme and it just feels icky and scammy.

[animeluvu]

𝐇𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐲 𝐀𝐥𝐬𝐨 𝐋𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐁𝐢𝐫𝐭𝐡𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐗𝐢𝐚𝐨 ―︎ ♡︎

✧︎°. 𝐅𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: Xiao

✧︎°. 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫: Gender neutral, no pronouns used.

✧︎°. 𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: Slight angst at the end

✧︎°. 𝐒𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: Xiao’s birthday wish.

✧︎°. 𝐀𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐥 𝟏𝟕𝐭𝐡: Xiao’s Birthday

Xiao’s birthday, also known as April 17th; this year he would be spending it with you and not alone. Although, he wouldn’t usually do anything for his birthday; just playing it off as another day of the year, nothing special. But you would think otherwise, planning on doing whatever he’d like on his special day.

So on the fateful day of his birthday, you woke up early and got his favorite food ready, almond tofu. You made sure it was perfect, practicing the recipe the days beforehand. You made sure to make a lot, wanting him to eat well. And after you made the almond tofu, you immediately went to get ready to go out.

After you had gotten ready, you quickly packed up all the almond tofu into medium-sized containers and got a bag to put them in. After that, you set on your journey to Wangshu Inn, which wasn’t too far. So when you went on the elevator and met up with Ver Goldet to say hello.

When she saw you, she instantly greeted you and gave you a present to give to Xiao. And after, directed you where Xiao was, telling you that he was on the highest floor in Wangshu Inn. Although, you had already known since you’ve been in a relationship with Xiao for a while. But before she let you go, she told you that she’s really happy that Xiao has taken a liking to someone and that she is grateful for you spending his birthday with him, since he’s never done anything special for his birthday.

“Don’t mention it,” you tell her, “I like being able to spend time with Xiao.”

She only smiled and said, “I’m happy he’s able to enjoy himself when he’s with you.”

You smiled back and walked to the stairs, giving her a wave, before going up the stairs to the top floor at Wangshuu Inn.

When you went up the stairs, you found yourself alone and Xiao nowhere to be seen. So you decided to get all your things situated, taking the food out of the bag and the cake out, putting a few candles on the cake for him to blow.

And then, when you finished getting everything, you called out his name in a soft whisper. Just like he had always told you, to call out his name whenever you need him. So when he appeared in front of you, you immediately went to hug him. Although he was a little shocked when you had called him and cut the hug short to search for any injuries.

You quickly reassured him that you were fine and that you weren't injured.

"Then what was the reason for you to call my name?" He inquired.

"It's your birthday, isn't it? I'd like to spend it with you, my love." You spoke with utmost sincerity.

"Ah, right today's my birthday. Although, I don't have anything planned I usually don't do anything today." He sighed.

"That's okay if you don't have anything planned, I was just hoping to spend time with you on this fated day," you smiled at him, giving his hand a firm squeeze.

"Today, I'd just like to do whatever you'd like," you gushed, "So, my dear, what is it you'd like to do today?"

Xiao's eyes widened a bit, before speaking, "All I'd like for today is to spend the day with you. Nothing more."

You laughed, "I was already planning on doing that Xiao. But if that's what you'd like to do today then I will make sure that you have a nice time today."

"Is there any wish that you have for your birthday?" You questioned.

“A wish?” Xiao asked curiously.

“Yes! What is it that you wish for on your birthday?” You asked him, “I’ll try my best to fulfill your wish no matter what it is.”

Xiao kept quiet for a few minutes, concentrating on what he’d like from you. And then after a few minutes, he answered your question.

He said, “Well if I can wish for whatever I’d like, I’d like for you to stay with me.”

You stayed quiet for a little, somewhat shocked by his answer. Xiao taking into account your quietness, looked at you and saw the shocked look on your face.

“Ah, I’m sorry.” He apologized, “That was a selfish wish, wasn’t it? I’ll think of another.”

After hearing his apology you quickly shook your head and reached for his hand, interlacing it with yours.

“It’s not selfish Xiao, I’m sorry if you thought of it like that,” you smile at him, and kiss his cheek, “I can do that; your wish. I’ll try my best to stay with you as long as I can.”

At the sudden display of affection, his cheeks grew warm, and his cheeks turned pink.

He whispered softly, "I actually brought you a few crystal cores, I was only trying to catch one, but I ended up catching more. Would you mind if I put them in your hair?"

You quickly said yes, and Xiao started to gently but the crystal cores in your hair, treating you like glass.

Xiao complemented you with a blush, telling you that you looked nice with the crustal cores in your hair and that he'd enjoy putting them in your hair again.

You laughed, causing him to smile, and then you said, "I wouldn't mind that. I'd love for you to put them in my hair again."

Xiao enjoyed the time he got to spend with you especially the day of his birthday. He found himself enjoying the day and spending time with you. Xiao found himself loving you even more than before on his birthday.

And as the sun, set, and the day is replaced with the stars and the night. He found himself wishing for his birthday to come again and for you to be there with him. But as he watches you fall asleep in his arms when you brought him to your home. He could only think of his wish and your answer to it.

One day you will no longer be here, and you will leave me in this world. But for the time being, I'd like to spend my days living the best days with you.

So as the two of you held each other in the safe of your home. Xiao could only hope for the best days with you and the day he'd eventually say goodbye.

✧︎°. There wasn't supposed to be any angst but then I was writing and it kinda just happened.

✧︎°. It's also been almost a week since I've uploaded so I'll try to get more things out because I currently have 25 drafts

I hope you enjoyed - ♡

[angloie]

Rivals. Nothing more. (1/2)

> Percy is annoyed on how Annabeth always was. Her passion to win, to suceed, to be better than him. He hates that. It's totally not hot, or whatever.

> Warnings: swearing and kinda (?) suggestive undertones, my writing

> Genre: fluff, mutual pinning, Percy having a huge fat crush on Annabeth.

You can find the second part here!

Percy wasn't very fond of smartasses who talked back.

I mean, who wouldn't? They were truly insufferable; acting like they knew everything and spat out facts here and there, all high and mighty.

Annabeth fit that description perfectly.

She's such a stuck up nerd; always beating his spot just opened place higher than him. When they spar, Percy can't help but feel a overwhelming urge pushing him to win. Annabeth struck back with the same passion, every strike, slash, push, thrust, holds her need for victory.

And when Percy does win after a long match? It feels amazing. The refreshing mood when you get exactly what you want- for once beating enemy number one. Annabeth shakes hands with him after and it infuriates him all over again. Why can't she feel more embarassed? Devestated? Shame? She walks away from the training arena calmly like she won over him.

Oh, Annabeth does feel embarassed. Devestated, too. But the look in Percy's eyes when she acts all stoic- seated stop her high horse- is simply electrifying. No better feeling than antagonizing your rivals, right?

They first meet at twelve. Both still young and insufferable, being the natural rivals they were. After all, their godly parents were two of the biggest rivals between one another: Athena and Posiedon.

Then they’re thirteen. Rivals, yes, but they can get along better now. Much better, in fact. Annabeth just feels the tiniest bit of attraction. It's just platonic. That's what she likes to tell herself, really.

Fourteen and Percy and her still bickering and arguing like usual. They can respect each other's boundaries still, all while they make crude jokes about the other. People say that they might be best friends, but the two of them shoot their ideas out of their heads. Who would wan't to be friends with that loser, anyways?

The ripe age of fifteen. Same old Percy, and same old Annabeth. They grow stronger together, and even more stronger as they progress. It's such a heartwarming thing to watch. Annabeth becomes more aware of how Percy looks. His apearance. Once a couple inches shorter than her becomes level-height. And then Percy has the audacity to grow taller than her. 

He likes to tease Annabeth about it. Holding books above her head, or anything he can grab that's hers. It's more blood-boiling when you remember the fact that people in ancient Greece associated height with power. Percy? Have more power than her? Unaceptable.

Percy on the flip side becomes more aware of how his endearing his rival becomes. Annabeth puts him in awe sometimes, incredibly witty and smart. But the snobbish attitude from her makes him want to gag. Maybe not as much as it did in the past other years. Annabeth, (as much as he hates to admit it) is someone he can trust. After years of being partners in both battle and else, that was expected. Percy still can't trust Annabeth with his blue cookies though.

Sixteen, finally. A confusing year for Percy. It becomes a growing problem for Percy when his heart beats erratically when Annabeth is near. Her shampoo smells so heavenly from where he's sitting, which is at the end of her bed. Annabeth sits crossed legged from him, flicking the pages of a book. Percy just saw the lights on from her cabin and crawled through the window. That would make her annoyed, right? No other reason; just to annoy her. Totally not because he wants to see her again.

Annabeth doesn't have the slightest clue in her mind about why she let him in. Or why he opted to sit on her bed directly, instead of sitting on one of the very comfortable seats in the large room. Annabeth doesn't complain. The cabin is empty; her other guests singing along at the campfire or elsewhere. 

Percy gets up wordlessly as Annabeth continues to stare at her book. Words are flowing through, forming, but she can't seem to focus to comprehend the book.

She notices his arrival when the bed dips with his weight. Percy has a blob of water in mid-air, floating just above the palm of his hand.

“You better not get that on my bed,” Annabeth chides, “Or I'll make sure to kill you.”

“Really now?” Percy makes the water floating towards her, threatening to soak her face. It stops inches before her- stopping from wetting her clothes along with it. She doesn't flinch.

Annabeth gives a sticky sweet smile, but her eyes say otherwise. Something along the lines of 'You better be digging up your grave now'. Percy flinches back in surprise, hands braced in a defensive position. The water shifts and floats back to him... to only float around the room aimlessly.

It's times like this when he feels truly at peace. The air is tense, sure, but he feels calmer than ever before. It's liberating.

The water leaks a bit from the moving. Annabeth is amazed how it moves so effortlessly. It's Percy moving it, but that didn't matter. Sometimes Annabeth wished she had powers... Her smarts and wits were amazing, but she felt that she could achieve even more if she had them. It's a painful thought.

Percy sits back on her bed, staring at the white celling. Different coloured sticky notes and red strings are hooked together by flimsy thumb tacks. Talk about being a nerd.

Both lost in their thoughts and a good book, the water comes back around the room to splash on-

Just fucking peachy.

On Annabeth.

“Percy!” She screeches, hair damp with liquid and some finding it's way on her white shirt. Due to the thin fabric and cool water, he shirt becomes a little more. How do you put it? transparent. Translucent.

“Oh shit-” Percy jerks upwards, moving his hands around frantically. If he stares any longer, he might become more aware of the now visible uhm- undergarments. He also might notice that they are blue, his favourite colour, and how it looks so fucking good on her. 

Okay, he's noticed all of that in a matter of seconds.

“Quit staring!” Annabeth protests more, as Percy gets up to face the wall and cover his eyes. 

“I didn't mean to!” He says, still facing away from her. “I-it was a accident!” I swear!”

“Quit you're blubbering and get out!”

“Sorry!” Percy says again, and again. “I’m really sorry!” Until he finds his way to the large mahogany door and steps out.

“I- uh-" He tries to reasonate, tries to make up with her. But it's quickly shut off when Annabeth slams the door in his face. Leaving a very stuttering and blushing Percy.

Seventeen. It's a dreadful year for the two of them.

It becomes painfully clear why Percy had been a blushing, embarrassing mess around Annabeth. Clear on why he feels like he's on cloud nine when she pins him down in the sparing arena. And incredibly clear why Percy thinks about her eyes, her smile, her everything. Even the random facts he always thought was annoying and stupid leave marks on his brain. 

The oblivious son of Poseidon denies his feelings. Just some rivalry feelings! Some of which include him wanting to kiss Annabeth so bad sometimes, or even wanting to hold hands while walking along the sand. Maybe he does have the occasional dream of some less than appropriate things. Percy's rather embarassed about that.

It's when Grover, his reliable and trustworthy best friend finally makes him realize his true feelings. Ones hidden layers of sarcasm and sharp jokes.

“You think about her twenty four seven,” Grover starts, leaning back on the thick trunk of the oak tree. Percy had just came to him mid-spar to tell him how Annabeth was absolutely destroying him.

“And you also blab about her nonstop. I dunno dude, that sounds like a crush to me.” Grover sighs heavily. Percy blinks once. Then twice. And then three times.

“Do you get jealous when you see her with someone else?”

“Yeah! It's sickening! I feel all weird and stuff, so I-”

“You have a crush~” Grover teases.

“No? I think it's just-"

“Its a crush, Percy. You're so oblivious that it'll never progress more than that.”

“What’s that supposed to mean!?” Percy scowls at him. A bead of sweat trails down his forehead, caused from the hours of training.

“It means you have to confess.” Grover simply states, getting up. His hooves clomp down on the hard-packed earth as he trails away. “You gotta do it sooner or later, before someone else does it!”

That thought makes bile rise in his stomach. Annabeth? Go out with someone's else? Other than him? No way. Negatory.

But what if she declines? Annabeth is completely free to do that; but Percy would probably die of heartbreak. And if she started to date someone? Percy would explode.

It's settled, then.

He's going to confess.

-

- a/n:

(re-uploaded to fix some mistakes, lol)

[baka-monarch]

So like- my favorite obscure horror game lore build up is just- gods I want more games to do this-

And you'd think it'd be my favorite (well technically second favorite because of mc-) five nights at Freddy's- BUT NO, no, actually my favorite lore build up is Hello Neighbor

Because finding the lore was just so fucking interactive- and yeah I'm aware it was probably a clever marketing scheme (but you HAVE to hand it to them, it's probably the most clever way to market that any video game has done-) because the lore search was constantly being uploaded in YouTube videos- but to be honest it made it more fun, more interesting, it held my interest from the first beta to the final release

I wasn't even able to play any of the games! I had to watch videos, but even so it so interesting! Just- the way they would hide lore bits OUTSIDE of the map and leave in glitches/bugs so players could go find them was genuinely smart in my opinion, plus it made more people want to play the game themselves because it was known that let's players would never be able to find all of the secrets so people couldn't just watch videos and learn the lore, they now had incentive to play the game and lore hunt themselves because of how hidden some pieces of lore would be

And in my opinion that's just- gods that's fun. Lore hunting has always been my favorite past time, especially with obscure lore that you won't find otherwise unless you actually dig for it, so a game where the test releases all had bits and pieces of lore hidden to find just meant a bucket load of fun for a little dork like me- and yeah back when Hello Neighbor was still releasing test games I wasn't able to play any of them because I didn't have a PC, but I still enjoyed scowering YouTube for any and all videos on lore (plus it was by this point that I was able to tell the difference between a lore hunt video and a clickbait video about a mod- I fell for several of those when looking into FNAF stuff) and for me it was fun! Especially since I was discovering all these other YouTubers that I otherwise wouldn't have ever heard of and then fell in love with their content!

Genuinely. Yes Hello Neighbor had a clever marketing ploy (whether intentional or not it worked and I'm surprised more game companies aren't doing this- and you can't even say they spoiled the final release because Hello Neighbor was almost NOTHING like the test games, the only real similarity was the game mechanics, because players actually didn't have enough pieces of lore to actually complete the lore puzzle so the ending was a genuine surprise as well!) but it was also it was a fun mechanic and a fun little addition to all the test games that they continued into the final release AND the sequel games! (There was even a secret game that could only be unlocked by getting a code from a deleted tweet that you would plug into the game files to unlock- tell me that isn't cool)

I'm gonna end this ramble here before I continue forever-

[chalkxtabletxtowers]

~A beach day full of feelings~

•Fandom: Ducktales, kinda? I based this fanfiction mostly off of the Italian comics, or "Lustige Taschenbücher" in Germany because the chemistry between the two is ströng there.

•Pairing: Donro, Donald x Gyro

•Warnings/Notes: Trans!Gyro is hinted, otherwise, this is just cute and wholesome. I originally wanted to upload it on valentines day, but I spent the day with my girlfriend and forgot about it, so here you have it now.

Everyone around them seemed to get the hints. Everyone around them seemed to understand what kind of relationship it was between them, better, than the two of them did. They were painfully oblivious, so much so, that they brushed the suspections of the people surrounding them off, even though they weren't unaware of them. But they both knew, or thought to know, that just because they were good friends, and because of that spend more time together, that that didn't mean something was going on between them.

Donald spent the days in the laboratory more often, these days. To upgrade his suit, that had been damaged pretty badly in the last incident with Magica. Even though he only understood half of was the scientist was explaining to him, it was still interesting to see old and new weapons, that were supposed to help him in the fight during crime.

On the inside, he knew that he liked spending the time in the laboratory. Being surrounded by someone. With the scientist in the room, he never had to fear that the silence took over. Silence, that he experienced everyday once the kids were out of the house. Since he never kept a job for more than three days, he didn't have any distraction. Without the three bringing life into the house, it was strangely empty, silent and big.

He had no real entertainment, besides reality TV, but that had changed ever since he spent the days in the laboratory. But he knew, that these days would be numbered pretty soon, after all, Gyro wouldn't have to fix his suit much longer, it was in pretty good condition again and the new weapons and inventions were all added, as much as that was possible.

But Donald didn't want these days to be numbered, which he, of course, couldn't tell Gyro. They were friends, and they did tend to spend some time on the weekend but... That would've been just weird, especially because Donald wasn't an apprentice, and probably wouldn't have been a very good one at that.

"There we go." the voice of the chicken interrupted his thoughts and the duck jumped "It's all fixed and ready for crime fighting again. I bet you were missed on the streets while having your forced break. But these days are over."

Donald was glad, that his suit was repaired again. He was glad, that he could do something against crime again. But on the other side, he was quietly crying. He decided to do something about it "The kids and I wanted to go to the beach on the weekend. And as a thankful gesture-" Since he obviously didn't have the money to pay the scientist "You could join us?"

The inventor seemed surprised. Not, that this was the first weekend he spend with the duck, but usually it was pretty spontaneous. Donald had never flat out asked like this, especially not in the middle of the week. "I.."

Gyro look around over his stuff, and his tables, and sighted "Think I could use a break"

When Donald returned home, the kids were already home too. He could tell by the mess in the hallway and the tossed aside schoolbags. He knew that homework hadn't been touched yet by either of them, but was too relaxed to care. He was in a good mood, but didn't really want to realise why. He just told himself it was because he could finally protect the city, and therefore the people that meant something to him, again. That was the reason, surely.

Donald decided to make pancakes for dinner, and when the kids came down the stairs because they had smelled them, they noticed that something was definitely up with their uncle "Why are you so relaxed?" "Yeah, why aren't you mad at us for not doing our homework yet?" "Did something exciting happen? Did you win the lottery? Are we rich?" "Are we rich?" "Are we?"

Donald chuckled. He wished. Well, technically, the family was rich, but he would've never gotten a single coin from his uncle, at least not until he eventually passed away. "We're not rich." He said as he sat down "I just..." He shrugged "Had a good day. Oh, and, we won't be going to the beach alone."

The three were, on their own, very well aware that their uncle had a crush. It wasn't something he could hide very well. The signs were too obvious. And they were also aware that this crush was centered towards a certain inventing chicken. But Donald, admitting that? Wouldn't happen. "Will Gyro be joining us?" Louie asked, his brothers chuckling in the background. God, it was so obvious "Yes. And that's nothing to make fun of! We're good friends and I'm being nice to him as a reward for all the good things he has done for us in the past! Including inventing stuff that wasn't only useful for me."

He looked at the three, and they knew what he was talking about. Their video game, that they could scan themselves into. Yeah, that was indeed a rad thing.

The rest of the evening wasn't so quiet, the three just couldn't stop teasing their uncle, no matter how often he kept denying a crush.

Gyro, on the other hand, wasn't much better. Not, that he wasn't well aware of the fact that he was a gay chicken.

No, he was just nervous of the thought of sharing a beach day with Donald, even though spending the weekends with the duck wasn't unusual. Sometimes, Donald would just come over for new inventions or to get something on his suit fixed, and afterwards they'd go to a café or watch a movie. Nothing unusual, just things that friends did.

And since they were friends, he was confused about his sudden nervousness. Why was a day at the beach something that suddenly scared him? After all these years, feathers had obviously grown over the scars on his chest, and he felt confident with being a male chicken.

In any way, the nervousness caused him to loose his concentration and he sighted in frustration. He wouldn't get anything done anymore, he had to take a break and clear his thoughts.

But eventually, the dreaded saturday did arrive, and there was nothing they both could do about it.

And even though they both were beyond nervous, they were also excited to spent the day with the person that meant something to them, even though they both weren't aware yet, what exactly that certain something was.

"Have we got everything?"

Donald asked, afraid that 313 would explode at any minute, judging by how full the poor car was. A single pool float was laying around, and he had almost tripped over it, and the sunscreen seemed to glue his feathers together, but he didn't care. Today was a good day, and he wouldn't let it get ruined by his reappearing bad luck.

"We think so!"

The triplets shouted back as they pressed themselves on the backseat of the car. After Donald had made sure they were strapped into their seats, like the good uncle he was, he started driving towards the beach.

"So, will you tell him today?"

Huey suddenly asked, the biggest grin plastered across his beak.

"Will I tell who what today?"

Donald asked, although he knew what they were talking about. And he could've sworn he got red under his cheek feathers.

"Will you tell Gyro today-"

Dewey continued "That he's the love of your life?"

Louie ended the sentence.

They didn't care if their uncle was in a gay relationship, as long as he was happy. And Gyro had visited them so often, that by now, they kinda viewed him as a uncle themselves. They just wanted them to finally realise their feelings, and be officially in a relationship. So that their uncle could be constantly as happy as he had been on Wednesday.

"I am not in love with him."

The duck stated, yet again. This wasn't the first time he had to defend himself in front of the kids. "We're very good friends, and that's all their is. Aren't you three glad that your uncle has found a friend?" All that he got in return from them was a simple chuckle. They knew.

After Donald had parked the car, they hopped out of it "Well, we wish you luck"

They said, before running, trying to find a good spot for themselves and the two love birds. They didn't want to be in the way of their confession.

And Donald, who was waiting at his car, did think about their words.

In love? Him? Well... He certainly knew how love felt, but... Yes, he liked to spent time with the chicken. Yes, he liked the chicken around him, and his company. And yes, they had slipped in each others arm once or twice during sleeping, but love? Didn't love cause butterflies in your stomach and a fast beating heart? He didn't feel anything of that. So it couldn't be love after all, right?

While Donald was lost in his thoughts, Gyro was already on the way to the beach, glowing with excitement.

He was, semi, aware of his feelings, or at least by now finally knew that they extended friendship. He wasn't sure yet in what way, but he was sure of one thing: That he was going to find out today. At least he wanted more weekends like this one, he told himself, and when he saw the bright red car on the horizon, he slowed down "I'm here."

He greeted Donald and almost automatically had to smile. This felt so normal, so... Domestic, as if they were a couple for years. Wait. Couple? Had he just really thought that? Blush started to arise at his cheeks, and the duck obviously noticed it, while the two made their way to the beach, the inventor either next to him, or behind him, when the way got slimmer.

"Are you alright? You look so red. Sure you haven't catched a sunburn already?" The worry in his voice came automatically, when you are a uncle of three very active nephews, you're basically worried 24/7. And, he also wanted his friend to be well. Everyone would've cared about their friend, right?

"N-No, I'm alright, the sunscreen is strong enough." Gyro quickly stuttered together, and the sailor just nodded. Eventually, after some silence, Gyro decided it would be best to switch the topic "And, did you try the new suit out yet? I hope everything works well?"

Donald nodded "Yeah, it's really good. I feel safer in this suit than I did before. The new inventions are practical, though some could need improvement." He chuckled.

When the triplets saw them walking over, they decided they had to do something. It was maybe the most cliché plan of their short life's so far, but something had to be done. These two couldn't continue walking around, being so oblivious towards one another.

So, Huey decided to take matters into his own hands and stretched his feet out. Normally, he wouldn't have wished his uncle to trip and fall over, but in this case, it was necessary for once

And, as the bad luck had already foreshadowed, their uncle did trip and fall, the scientist, that had walked behind him, falling on top of Donald. The three cheered, that was exactly what they had wanted. They didn't care how cliché this was, they knew it would work.

And sometimes, the most cliché ways were the best ways. As Donald rolled on his back in a dizzy attempt to orientate himself, his eyes catched the eyes of the scientist. In that moment, he realised it.

Maybe love wasn't all butterflies and a fast beating heart. Maybe love was all about finding comfort in someone. And being at home, with someone. And with Gyro, he certainly was at home.

"I-I love you."

The duck spurted out, his face immediately after becoming so red, that it could have been a rival to the worst sunburn. As Gyro heard the words, the chicken blushed again, before clearing his throat "I-I can only agree. The time we spent together is the most beautiful time of my entire day. I'm always looking forward to it, and when you're gone, I feel lonely. I feel like a part of me is missing. With you..."

"I feel comforted and at home. I feel like I'm in a safe space with someone, that understands me and doesn't judge me. And someone, that certainly knows my deepest secrets."

As the two joined each other in a loving kiss, the triplest cheered. They had known it all along.

[myucornerorg]

I love the omakes! A big goal of Myu Corner for me has been to highlight the omakes, because I never saw much about them online, and that's a shame cause they're great. And then I discovered this YouTuber named texmexium that uploaded some of the unreleased ones. The quality is not great, but otherwise I would never have seen things like the Rock n' Rock fan event, which starts out like a normal Fankan then halfway through basically becomes a j-pop concert, with gems like Anza performing Namie Amuro's "Body Feels Exit" (in an outfit very similar to the one from "Knockin' Down Hesitation," and since this event happened in 1996, I wouldn't be surprised if one influenced the other...her performance also led me to discover the original song, which is super cool and fun to dance to) and Saitou Rei doing a song from Cabaret. Anza and Morino also perform "Just Combination," a song they previously released as the duo unit MOMO for Sakurakko Club, at the event. The event ends with a cool acapella "Moonlight Densetsu" too. I wrote a full recap of it here.

The omakes let us see rehearsal stuff, ad libs from the senshuurakus, and performances of songs we might never see otherwise, like the girls singing villain songs (Marina's deep voice in these is scary, and Yuu's Tomoe voice in "Magus Collection" is equally scary), unique solos (though I wish we got more of Nao's performance of "Knockin' Down Hesitation"; the Kaguya K Omake video only gives us a snippet), and the Duet Corners. I still absolutely love Marina and Yuu's performance of "Mitsumeteite Yo" from the Starlights Fankan, where Yuu accompanies them on guitar.

Glad to see I'm not alone!

Am I the only one who watches the Sera Myu specials, such as the guide videos and omakes, and thinks it would have been the best time ever to be in the musicals XD like, all of it looks so fun! I’m jealous of everyone who has been cast in Sera Myu for having infinitely more fun than I ever will XD

(btw it is like 4am for me and I’m watching the Transylvania no Mori guide video so this is what my brain likes to come up with I should probably go to bed haha)