#also in my mind for this AU Regulus James and Lily are Harry's parents but thats just me because I like Jegulily
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brandileigh2003 · 3 months ago
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Raising Harry and/or teddy recs. I know I'm missing some so send me your faves or self rec ❤️❤️
~~~please give these authors love, fandom engagement with writers is down and it means more than you know. ~~~
-orange juice (i've been ready for you to come home for so long) by raggedypond get back together ft Chronic Illness
-my love, take care of yourself by @littleoldrachel ft mental health and chronic
-Anything that msalexwp writes that includes the trope is fantastic
Let's Play Pretend muggle fake dating real feelings
Second Generation get back together
-the sea is a good place to think of the future by peachyybabe get back together ft Chronic Illness @lavenderhaze
-Like Real People Do by thirdcrow: coffee shop, great disability rep
-An Infinte Ocean by orphan_account muggle get together
-Babysitting For Dummies by Middleofamoment (37k) au raising teddy get together (theres a sequel and 3rd to come)
-We’ll Make It Out Alive by wolfstar_addict417: muggle texting kidfic
-Blue Moon Café by @lazuli-moon raising teddy coffee shop
-Forever Is a State of Mind -orphaned account ft deaf remus
-Of Bookshelves and Baby Carriers by @poppunkpadfoot
-the mayors of simpleton by @fruityindividual older wolfstar get back together ft blind remus
-Till We Have Arrived Home Again by prouvairing divergent
-Of Quiet Hearts And Thundering Dreams by @tracingpatternswrites
-Spare! by B1ackCatChatsBack muggle get together
-I didn’t sign up for this by Moonystoastandmarsbars get back together
-Of Protein Powders and PTAs by @squintclover and TracingPatterns magical divergent
-A Wolf, A Bear, A Dungeon Master, and Boy Wonder by @ratmom819 ft chronic illness
-Puppy Magic by @demonbanisher thefifthmarauder17 magical divergent
-what a wonder (what a waste) by peachyybabe mcd magical divergent ft trans remus, mental illness and
-Aging Gracelessly by orphan_account older wolfstar texting
-So I'll Take My) Good Fortune by orphan_account muggle uni
-The Molinete & the Media Luna by punkwolfstar ft disability
-beautiful boy (darling boy) by @impishtubist and roaming_the_greenwood1: magical divergent ft trans remus
-Multiplying Parents by @heartofspells harry wants to find Sirius a bf
-ten reasons (to go to michigan) by @greyeyedmonster-18 muggle au get together
-The Things I Did by Lolo_row divergent
-Of Memories and Milk Thievery by moonymoment older wolfstar get back together @mayescapade
-Basilisks, Boggarts and Boyfriends (oh my) by OptimisticDinosaur
-Of Caffeine Addictions and Nail Polish by BlueAzalea au pining and fluff
Check out my fandom wife lucigoo she has some wonderful ones
Common Woodbrown by @imochan
that’s the art of getting by sarewolf
----Self rec: parks and playdates ft disability plus trans and asexual remus
~~Others' recs ~~
-Wherever I am/ you will always be - BrigidFaye
(anon): Under Foot, Under Moon by sometimeswelose
-An unexpected reunion- r33sesPieces
Rhythm & Blues by lez_writes13
stealing harry by @copperbadge
-Blanket Fort by @samynnad102687 : Regulus, James, and Harry build a blanket fort.
-Trick-or-Treating by Samynnad102687: The Marauders, Regulus, and Lily take Harry Trick-or-Treating.
-Unbound by you by friendlyneighborhoodtrickster, TracingPatterns
-Moonless Nights by @sliebman10 Sirius is trying to rebuild his life after the fateful Halloween of 1981. He's struggling to come to terms with Remus's betrayal and his new role as Harry's guardian.
-Family Vacation by sliebman10: Sirius is skeptical that a family resort is where he wants to spend his first summer vacation with Harry there, but he comes to see its merits when he meets Remus and his family.
-All the soul and body scars by 1point21
-To build a family - secondsister
-Forever live and die - wolfpants
--feel free to check it my main rec list
Also - the wolfstar librarian has awesome collections for raising harry
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vinylfoxbooks · 3 months ago
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Bingo Master Post
I'm taking part in the Jegulus Bingo 2024 and wanted to put together all of my fics as I publish them!
Here's my bingo card:
Here are the prompts that I've filled out:
Tumblr media
I'm Leaving Home for the Coastline (Somewhere Under the Sun) Prompt: Regulus stealing James' Sweater | T | wc: 11,470 Regulus runs away from France and finds himself in a small town where he finds a very pretty person.
I'm a Creature of Fine Sensations Prompt: Black and White Films | T | wc: 1,906 James takes Regulus along on a tradition that they have with Remus and Lily, going to a drive in theater that plays black and white movies.
Beauty in Betrayal Prompt: Apocalypse | T | wc: 7,368 Regulus shows up at the Potters' house on Halloween and tells them that they were betrayed and that they need to run. They do and them, Harry, and their friends find refuge in a hidden area.
Following the Prophecy Prompt: Dungeons & Dragons | T | wc: 17,927 | 5/5 chps. Lily is DMing a D&D campaign with some friends and new faces, that's it. It's just a kind of homebrew D&D Here's a link to the character sheets, one per chapter posted.
He Wants the Star (But Who is That?) Prompt: Parent Jegulus | T | wc: 6,666 James and Harry host a Christmas party where they invite all their friends. However, part of the way through the party, Harry starts asking for a 'Star' and while James knows who it is and everyone is able to put two and two together, no one knows who this 'Star' person is.
Teaming Up With the 'Enemy' Prompt: Free Space | T | wc: 5,536 Regulus and Barty get together, much to the chagrin of Evan, James, and eventually Pete. The three boys form a bond over their useless gay pining for people that they're sure they'll never have.
Care for Me? Prompt: Sick Fic | T | wc: 1,859 Regulus gets his wisdom teeth removed and James takes care of him during the healing process.
Oh My God, They Were Roommates Prompt: Childhood Friends | T | wc: 4,066 Sirius invites Remus, the guy that he's been talking to and Regulus' coworker, over to their flat for the first time and informs his brother and best friend that they should engage in their 'plan', the same thing that they do to everyone new that Sirius brings about to the flat.
Protect Me (Take Me Away) Prompts: Regulus Sings to James and Sectumsempra | T | wc: 13,784 James and Remus are pirates that went under cover as knights to kidnap the princes. Along the way, they happened to fall in love.
This Man Belongs to Me, I Want Him Prompts: Animagus AU and Black Cat Regulus | T | wc: 5,193 James goes on the arduous journey to visit his husband, a vampire living in a faraway castle in France, and how he loves the journey.
BINGO!
Better Than a Movie Prompt: Latex | E | wc: 6,310 The group convinces Regulus to go to a Halloween party, where he happens to run into James... James who's wearing a skirt.
Lover (Betray) Prompt: Gellert Grindelwald | T | wc: 6,862 Regulus and James, popular ghost hunters, go to explore the long abandoned Nurmengard Castle with their friends Barty and Evan. What happens if they talk to Grindelwald himself?
Brothers and Boyfriends are Easy to Mix Up Prompt: Tell me you Didn't | T | wc: 1,908 James and Regulus always meet up in the changing rooms when one or both of them have Quidditch practice or a game, however James doesn't have their glasses fresh out of the shower.
Two Alike Minds Prompts: Camping Trip and A Proposal | T | wc: 7,234 James takes Regulus out on a camping trip to help distract him from his classwork. It turns out to be the best camping trip of Regulus' life, no matter the complaining.
Books on Books on Books Prompt: The Fault in Our Stars | T | wc: 3,926 James has been begging Remus for him to take them on a trip to the muggle bookstore that Remus always visits, but it's also Remus' sacred time. But they really need to get some books. Here's a link to the list that James brings to the store!
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inferi-ous · 1 year ago
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**PROBABLY ABANDONED??**
Free 🇵🇸🇸🇩🇨🇩| BLM
Palestine masterpost by sulfurcosmos
Post with donations links for Palestine, Congo, and Sudan by rockabswing
Palestine resources
Hi! I mostly write fanfic and reblog Marauders related posts here.
I adore Starchaser (Jegulus/Sunseeker)! ❤️💚 I also love bartylus. I read most ships, actually, but those are my faves right now (i contain multitudes).
Regulus is trans to me! 🏳️‍⚧️
Since this is a sideblog, likes and follows are from my personal blog, kissmewithyourfists.
I will not follow you back if you are under 18, or don't have your age in your bio/I can't tell that you're over 18, or your blog is blank.
Links
AO3 TikTok
DISCLAIMER
I haven’t read the Harry Potter books in years at this point. I do watch the movies from time to time. I am aware of all the issues in the canon, including the racism, antisemitism, fatphobia, sexism, and homophobia (and more 😬). I am very critical with the original material when I engage in it. I do not financially support Joanne in any way.
I do think critically about what it means to be in this fandom. I do my best to minimize any further harm. I do speak out against Joanne and the issues in the Harry Potter books.
I know the criticisms about being in this fandom and I still choose to be here, and I’m the one who has to deal with what that means.
My Fics (under cut)
Headache (starchaser, trans regulus, AU - royalty/arranged marriage, Explicit, WIP)
Prince Regulus Black always knew a few things about marriage: he wouldn’t get to choose his partner, he would marry a man (because his parents would never see him as a man), and that it would be loveless. His new husband, James Potter, can try to change Regulus’s mind about that last one, but he won’t. He doesn’t care that James is kind and patient and very attractive. No, love is not in the cards for Regulus. A story about learning to love and learning to be loved.
James, the Sun (starchaser, background wolfstar and marylily, trans regulus, AU, Mature, 23.9k)
James has been struggling with feeling like he’s too much ever since he and Lily divorced. He’s trying to balance fatherhood, his newly found bachelorhood, and the fact that Sirius keeps disappearing for weeks trying to find his long lost brother, Regulus. When Regulus comes back into Sirius’ life things get even more complicated. OR James is the sun and Regulus tries not to burn.
fool for you (starchaser, Band AU, Mature, 6.5k)
Hard rock lead singer Regulus Black is possibly in love with his brother’s best friend, James Potter (okay, he definitely is). He gets inspired to write a sappy love song and it leaves his fans wondering: who’s got Regulus so soft?
say "don't go" (starchaser, AU, Mature, 1.4k)
i would stay forever if you say, “don’t go.” Lately, things have been rocky for James and Regulus, but all James needs to hear are two simple words.
Hard Days (starchaser, trans regulus, AU, Teen, 1.1k)
Regulus wakes up with body dysphoria and seeks out his boyfriend, James.'
The Best Boyfriend (starchaser, trans regulus (mentioned), AU, Teen, 1.5k)
Regulus has the best boyfriend. Even if he makes him worry sometimes.
My Blood (Regulus & Sirius, Canon Compliant, Mature, 3k, Major Character Death)
Sirius came back home for Regulus. Sirius protected Regulus the best he could, until the end.
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imthefuckingmirrorball · 2 years ago
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To the marauders writers on this app, there is just this idea that has been on my brain for so long but i can not write for my dear life so if anyone wants to write this go for it and tell me about it so i can read it, ok so jily dates for a while after school (it doesn't really matter if it's howarts or not, it doesn't affect the idea) they have harry, and like a year ish, maybe a few months after harry is born they split up amicably, a year or pass and they are just healthy coparenting harry while living together just not as a couple, and then like mary (who's been a super supporting friend all this time) kinda confess to lily one night that she likes her, lily is kinda conflicted about it but after some though she decides to go for it, AND THEY ARE PERFECT TOGETHER, they are supper in love, and we can do like a little time skip of a year or so after exploring their relationship while is fresh. regulus come back to town and reconnect with sirius and james (who's now living alone bc marylily got their own flat) (also for this jegulus must have dated in high school, and broke it off for some reason) so jegulus gets back in touch and get back together, and EVERYONE knows about it except sirius (he can find out later) so then marylily and jegulus can co parent harry. Idk this has just been smt that has been on my mind for a while and i think it has the potential to have so many good tropes and fluffy moments, it can also obviously have side wolfstar and dorlene
Also: here are a list of things that i have an idea for but don't know where to put it chronologically and also some extra details.
- they can have a double wedding (kind of a britanna/klaine moment but it was actually planed)
- harry can be the ring bearer, idk i just think it could be so cute
- peter can officiate bc their officiant canceled last minute and he randomly has an officiants linces he got years ago
- dual pov from lily and james
- lily comes to terms with being a lesbian at some point of the story (that's just my personal headcannon for her)
- dorlene can be a fashion designer and dessing marylily's and jegulus' suits and dresses (also lily can pull a Santana and wear a suit bc she would totally rock it)
- wolfstar can be the flower girls (like in those tik tok videos where the brother of the bride trow the flowers)(they can be best mans too)
- KINDERGARTEN TEACHER JAMES POTTER (if it's a modern au)
- reggie can be like a business man or smt and at the end he quits to open a flower shop ( yes i'm being cliche)
- LATINX LILY EVANS AND REMUS LUPIN, I WILL NOT CAVE ON THIS AS A LATINA I NEED A FIC WHERE THEY ARE LATINX. And if anyone who might wanna write this isn't latinx (or chilean bc as one i specifically need remus to be one) i can provide translation with slang ( of my country at least) and can answer any question about being latinx that you may have
- lily is nurse who also paints as a side job/hobby (this can also come to mary posing for her so that lily can paint her and having a cute fluffy moment)
So yeah that's about it, ik i have a mostly solid idea of what the fic might end up as, but as i said i can not write even if my life depended on it, so if anyone has the most minimum interest on the premise i'm begging you to write it
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stonedregulus · 3 years ago
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Hey bestie! Can you give us a list of your top 3 favorite fics? It doesn’t matter what pairings, just your top 3. :)
SCREAM i’m so excited to share these!!!
1. This Must Be the Place
author: @aibidil
rating: E
pairings: james sirius potter/teddy lupin (background harry potter/draco malfoy & albus severus potter/scorpius malfoy)
summary:
When your dad is Harry Potter, your face shows up in Teen Witch, your social media videos go viral, and sometimes your life depends on pretending to date your metamorph godbrother, whom you've been over for years, thank you very much. Or, the one where James and Teddy do animal yoga and risqué karaoke and their families could do with seeing fewer videos of them snogging.
i cannot even explain to you how much i adore this fic. jeddy is one of my favorite ships and this is a great depiction of them. i also really love the world this author created and the different wizarding(and otherwise) mental disorders they included. i find that kind of stuff, the mundane normal human life experiences that a lot of people just skip when they're writing magical world fics, so fascinating. also, the whole idea of a soul-bond/mind-bond is super fucking cool. 10/10 would highly recommend.
2. The Devil's White Knight
rating: E
pairings: harry potter/draco malfoy (background james potter/regulus black & sirius black/remus lupin)
summary:
When Harry wakes up in an alternate timeline--a timeline where Voldemort was defeated long before the first war--he discovers everything is different. His parents, his godfather, his friends--and him. Harry must deal with the consequences of who he would have been if he had been raised by his parents, and figure out where he stands with his casual hook up, Draco Malfoy.
guys... STARCHASER DADS... WOLFSTAR DADS!!! i am dying. this is just... this fic is absolutely everything to me. the drarry part is... well if you know me you know I'm not a drarry person (i say that and yet here I am recommending two drarry fics to you *face palm* i know wtf but whatever) BUT i am not mad at the drarry in this... i actually like it... WHAT?! yeah. i know *shrugs* i don't know. anyways, regulus as a dad makes me insanely happy. he is the perfect dad. i absolutely adore him. the sirius/harry relationship in this makes me cry so fucking much it's unreal. anyways, super cute, may actually be my fave fic of all time.
3. Blends
rating: M
pairings: sirius black/remus lupin & james potter/lily evans
summary:
Words got in the way sometimes, but Remus got the sense Sirius knew what he was trying to say. - Another coffee shop au.
look, if you haven't heard of this yet i would be somewhat shocked. i know some people hate coffee shop aus, but just... trust me on this one, okay? it's so fucking good. one of the reasons i love it is because it feels so real. i kind of mentioned that with my first rec up above, but i love when the author puts in an effort to make things relatable to real life, and this definitely has that. i also love the way this author portrays sirius, james, remus, and lil. sometimes i feel like people just don't get it right (my own opinion of right, i know, i know) but this author really gets them and writes them well. if you want a great modern wolfstar au, this is it my friends. also, it has a sequel that is still in progress :)
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limetimo · 3 years ago
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RAB fics I read these weeks (17th April -1st May)
first footings by wheresmejumper  Regulus survives the cave and secretly goes to live with the Potters and baby Harry. They slowly grow to like each other. Super sweet! 
Did You Miss Me? by Fantismal, Krethes  modern celebrity AU with identity porn and much more, Wolfstar, Jily, mind the tags, excellent reading. Didn’t expect to fall in love with Bellatrix but here we are
A Little Bit of Everything by Frenchroast99  Regulus raising Harry
Regulus Has a Ghost in his Room by godimsuffering  this!!!! so good! Regulus has a ghost in his room (it’s Dead Regulus). The ghost encourages him (as much as it can) to stick with Sirius against their parents, and for his heart and loyalty - Reggie is sorted to Hufflepuff!
Leto by Anonymous for Chaotic_Gryffindor_Sass  RABfest, Bartylus, blew me away. beautiful and haunting, it really is.
Quite Like Us by alarainai  wrong number slowburn Jegulus! v sweet, v lovely, with just enough dramam to keep it spicy ♥
Lying to Myself by Anonymous RABfest I’M FUCKEN SCREAMING MY MIND IS BLOWN MY HEART IS BROKEN
The Marauders and the Chamber of Secrets by SilverShadow1  MArauders + Regulus + Lily read HP and the Chamber of the Secrets! Jegulus, and Lily is ready to commit murder in the name of her never-to-exist-in-their-universe child :D
Star Stepper by Ourania95  Regulus runs away from home, gets jobs, adopts another homeless child, he’s on a roll while Orion is losing is fucking mind with worry and the difference in mood between REgulus’ and Orion’s chapters is so funny sksksksksksk
My Jamie by Kira_readsbooks  Jegulus, cute, they get engaged! but also angst ‘couse war
“I've loved the stars too fondly to be fearful of the night” by Anonymous  this is a RABfest moodboard but it’s really very pretty and you should look at it
Small Impact by Shadowmun Jily but James is secretly Regulus’ sub aaaaaaaaaaand then Regulus is dead. Go experience the emotions for yourself!!
lycoris radiata by nyxveuss he’s in a time loop by babes! Drown in the cave -> wake up in fifth year with a head injury from Quidditch practice. Ilysm, Slytherin Quidditch team ♥♥♥
yours for the night by willowjh  flirty remus/regulus slowburn 
forever is a long time by wtfmylove  CUTE CUTE CUTE CUTE CUTE JEGULUS IS GETTING MARRIED I REPEAT CUTE
Diptych by pansysnarkinson  Lucius gifts Regulus a diary... and strange things start happening at Hogwarts. Ehehe
Steal Some Time by ardentlychaotic, BlueSundayCake  Regulus and James go camping muggle style! I mean they’re hiding from Death Eaters but I bet Dumbledore playing matchmaker influenced their situation somewhat :D
Tell Me Pretty Lies by fuckboyregulus  rosestarchasekiller, top notch soap-opera levels of drama, we love Mrs. Crouch!
Dominoes by LimeOfMagicLimo, wtfmylove  James and Regulus have a sorta accidental road trip across India and oh my god I’m responsible for the next chapter, how am I to write when I’m too busy marveling at wtfmylove’s creation?? There’s so much going on here my dudes
Is It True That... by disillusionist9  so effing cute I can’T. James asks Remus about love
Name Like Poetry by orphan_account  I’m s c r e a m i n g this IS poetry
Perfect Places by wtfmylove  Bellatrix killed a bitch and now Regulus has to work with his most beloathed enemy James Potter to keep the family business afloat :D
  when you were mine by battlehamster  I. does this fic need any more introduction? Go read it if you haven’t yet! Single parent James! Major little bitch Regulus! Broken hearts and mended bridges! Baby Harry!
movement by oceanicfeelings  James is not dead and Regulus is not dead but Voldemort will be if they have anything to say about it. Also they both need a thousand year nap and therapy
Aiepathy by peachloulou HANAHAKI DISEASE my beloveds (James has it)
lovelorn liars by orphan_account   HANAHAKI DISEASE my beloveds (Regulus has it)
this is me trying by witchhunts  he’s trying ok. aka Regulus time travels to his younger body anddd has to play nice with his brother and his friends so that he doesn’t have to go to Grimmauld’s for the hols
Around broken in two, 'Till your eyes shed, into dust by Mrs_Stubby_Boardman  in OotP Sirius has a nightmare and it makes him think of Regulus
Burning Doves by TowardTheStars  Snape/Regulus, Regulus notices Snape is pretty smart and it goes from there. 
I see you in the stars by Bibliosmia0  James has 99 problems and his obsession with the quiet Slytherin is about 99 of them
In the Bleak December by tenrousei_kuroi  Blackcest, Sirius refuses to get married so Walnut and Onion decide to wed Regulus instead... Sirius comes to the rescue also Sirius/Regulus get kinda married via potion
my sweet boy (i close my eyes) by PsychiatristGirl - Blackcest, Orion/child Regulus  (there’s continuation that’s just. Omg even more fucked up but also you can’t look away. I’d say train wreck but with emphasis on the tragedy)
Soundless by dalula for Ticigi  Blackcest, Orion/teen Regulus but like. consensual.
As Soon As He Can by Trex_patronus ghost Regulus goes Horcrux hunting with the Marauders and friends! We love Frank ♥ Also excited REgulus is the cutest
We're older now, the light is dim by Winter_Oswin  Lily sees her baby mistreated from behind the Veil and NOT ON HER WATCH. With James’ support and Regulus’ knowledge of souls the three brave toasters fight their way back to the land of living, taking names, kicking ass, and most importantly letting little Harry know he’s loved ♥
Turned Tides by rsbarelle  Regulus runs off to the Potters with Sirius. It doesn’t fix all their issues...
Black Skies by danpuff  Regulus wants Sirius to love him buttt finds love with Snape instead... it’s still complicated tho. Blackcest but the focus is on Severus/Regulus
A Not So Subtle Attraction by acydpop dude has a crush on his older brother and doesn’t realise until they kiss. also Blackcest. I found the Blackcest Fest 2022 okay
snipers solve 99% of all problems by silentwalrus  not a Regulus fic but holkahkfhl FULL METAL ALCHEMIST HARRY POTTER CROSSOVER I DIDN’T KNOW I NEEDED maaaan makes me want to re-watch fma. 
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pateldevs · 4 years ago
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Hello! I am a little new to your tumblr and love all the stuff you post particularly the wolfstar. I'm a pretty-solid-sorta-background-reader-but-sometimes-talker in the hp ao3 fanfic crew and have read a LOT of dramione and a variety of rare pairs BUT I have been wanting to read wolfstar for like a year and have just never gotten around to finding my jumping off point in that. Do you have an recs? Thanks in advance <3
hey!! first of all welcome and thank you so much for your kind words! (i’m also super honored that you’re looking for my opinion on wolfstar fics!!) tbh i tend to read like the same 5 fics over and over ~for comfort~ but here are some of my faves, putting them below the cut bc i did also include my thoughts and opinions:
if you like marauders-gen fic...
the lost generation — this is it folks. this is the holy grail of fics for me. it’s well-written, it expands way beyond canon, it has lots of regulus content, it develops all the marauders era characters so perfectly. mostly set during marauders era at hogwarts, canon-compliant, with lots of jily as well. it’s super long (it was started in 2013!!) and is still in progress so there is plenty to get through although i did fully get totally up to date (then 130 chapters) in like 2 days when i read it lol. really i can’t recommend this fic enough, i’ve read it like 6 or 7 times in its entirety and it gets me every time.
it never goes out — completed and canon-compliant, another amazing marauders-gen fic set during hogwarts years. if you like reading cultural backstory (e.g. remus being welsh and seeing him interacting with his home & culture during the holidays) then would highly highly recommend since this has a lot of personality & character beyond just “boarding school” kind of vibes. lots of jily, lots of dorlene, much more contemporary in language compared to TLG above (like imo you can tell it’s american influenced but i don’t mind at all), and very in-tune with the 70s time period. cw for themes of abuse, addiction, and self-harm but relevant chapters are always marked. again i’ve reread this like 3 or 4 times and it was also one of the first wolfstar fics i ever read so <3 the author is also super nice!!
holy things — pretty young fic (as in they haven’t gotten together yet) but again it’s canon-compliant, set during the marauders’ years at hogwarts. if you like thoroughly developed metas and hcs about the harry potter universe this is for you! cw for themes of abuse and violence but relevant chapters are marked. background jily and dorlene and bonus content with cho chang’s parents lol. 
sanctuary — ok i always leave and come back to this fic because it’s quite slow-moving and the author is VERY specific about everything. whenever i come back to it i’m just floored by the level of detail. slight au where remus thinks his lycanthropy can be passed through touch but still very much canon-compliant.
brave faces, everyone — THIS IS THE SEQUEL TO IT NEVER GOES OUT and it is fantastic, again same exact vibes as its prequel in terms of historical context/late 70s vibes and a lot of cultural backstory to everyone. LOTS of domestic wolfstar and jily, plenty of background dorlene. again, canon-compliant. cw for themes of addiction, but again the author is super sweet and always marks all the chapters concerned
if you like aus...
the last great american dynasty — ok i don’t read wolfstar aus much BUT i love this one because it’s politics and i love that vibe. also it’s set in the states. slightly young adult (post college), kind of rwrb vibes if you like that! still very young but chapters are super substantial <3
if you want some angst...
the last farewell — ok this is the king of angst fics, it’s set before book 7 where remus tries to grapple with his guilt over marrying tonks so if you like stuff that respects canon/fits with the canon universe/timeline and you don’t mind remadora but still want wolfstar, this is for you. cw for grief obvs
several ways to apologize — a post-whomping willow prank fic, personally i like this one a lot because it’s a refreshing change from the usual “remus is angry everyone is picking sides” kind of fic
it’s alright — this is more hurt/comfort than angst but if you love nightmare hurt/comfort fics this is for you!! i regularly return to this one because i like to ✨project✨ but it’s just such a lovely wholesome fic with a happy ending :’)
to perish by the power of fire — very long one-shot set during hogwarts years with a particular emphasis on remus’ pov and his relationship with his lycanthropy and sirius, plenty of angst but with a happy ending
if you like dadfoot and domestic wolfstar fics (where sirius and remus raise harry)...
hold on to this lullaby — canon-compliant, where sirius manages to get to godric’s hollow and the order shows up right after voldemort finds james and lily :( fast-paced writing but it’s sirius & remus raising harry!! which is super sweet and cute all the time :)
a store of happiness — ok this is another one of my comfort fics, canon-divergent/fix-it starting at the end of book 3 where sirius is exonerated and he and remus take care of harry :) i come back to it probably once a week, it’s so cute <3
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mirclealignr · 4 years ago
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Current WIP Requests!
Just showing y’all what’s to come!
And keeping myself organised so I don’t lose anything! Requests are still open! (And just so you know I accept more than just Remus and Sirius hahah)
Who I write for • Prompt List #1 • Prompt List #2 •
Remus x Reader requested by @emmaloo21 ~ REQUESTS ARE OPEN?!?!?! Oh my gosh, maybe a Remus Lupin x Reader, Marauders Era, where reader gets into a fight with a Slytherin or something gets severely injured due to a unfair attack? So he comes and visits her in the hospital wing?
Sirius x Reader requested by anon ~ Heyy could you please write a sirius x reader where Sirius lashes out and calls the reader unimportant and then the reader doesnt talk to him for a few weeks and sirius realises what he said and regrets it. Im sorry if this is too specific. I love your your work btw❤❤
Harry Potter
Harry x reader requested by @mischiefsemimanaged Hey, I’d love to be added to your tag list! Also have a request: a Harryxreader where y/n’s embarrassed about her surgery scars. I’m having another surgery Friday and I wish I had a Harry lol. No worries if you don’t have time, love your work! Thanks so much!!
Charlie x reader requested by @barry-blockman ~ can i request a Charlie Weasley x reader where they were best friends w mutual pining at hogwarts but did nothing about it but they reuinte at the quidditch world cup bc arthur invites the reader since they remain close w the weasleys?? and they get together after when the reader stays at the burrow or whatever you want really!!! thank you so much!!
Seveurs (golden era) x Order!reader requested by @purpledragonturtles ~ Could you write a adult! Severus x Order member!Reader one shot in which they argue with each other, both unaware that the other is flirting with them. I don't know why but I picture Snape as a teasing kind of flirter. Of course, please some fluff (and angst) at the end
Draco x reader (part 2) requested by @patton-fielder ~ Hey sweetie! Could I get a part 2 to that heart breaking Draco x Hufflepuff!Reader request I asked for? Using 2, 7, and 8 from the fluff section? (All of them said by Draco preferably as an apology) i love ya so much ♥ stay safe! - prompt list 1
James x Slytherin!reader requested by anon ~ Hey luv, just saw that your requests are open again YES! Maybe on with james where the reader is pureblood and Slytherin and they met at a gala or something, he invites her for a dance andddd i dont really know i trust your amazing talent eheh Sorry to bother thanks in advance xxx
Marauders x short!reader requested by @remibarnes22 ~ Hiya honey, can I request a short reader and marauders fic where they’re looking after her? Like against bullies and tall things. Good ol’ fluff ❤️❤️ thanks xxx
remus x reader requested by @screaming123 ~ Im a self indulgent slut so maybe a remus fic taking care of reader after a bad day? If requests are still open ofc Hope youre having a fantastic day/night/both! 💗
regulus x reader requested by anon ~ Fluff 6, misc 8 with regulus pls 👀 prompt list 1
draco x reader requested by @the--queen-of-hell ~ May I request 2 and 15 from the fluff prompts for draco x reader? Thanks in advance (if you need me to be more specific, I can send another ask!) 😊💖💕 prompt list 2
remus x reader requested by anon ~ remus x reader soulmate 4 (both emotional and physical with more emotional pain for reader)
weasley twin x reader requested by @dreamer821 ~ Soulmate 4 & 5 (or either really!) with one of the twins??? 🙈🧡 prompt list 2
charlie x reader requested by @barry-blockman ~ hey sweetie!! congrats on reaching your goal, its very well deserved!! can i please, if its not a problem, request fluff no. 7 w (you guessed it) charlie weasley?? thank you so much 🥰
fred x reader requested by anon ~ Can I request a Fred Weasley x reader where the reader is Angelina's twin sister and Fred and George flirt with them all the time? Thank you!
harry potter x reader requested by anon ~ Hello dear! Can I request a harry potter x reader where the reader is just like Lily Evans and everyone who knew her has a soft spot for her because she reminds them of Lily? Also the reader has been friends with Harry since first year and they are in love with each other and everyone low-key loves seeing them together because they remind them of James and Lily?this idea sounded cute in my mind. Have a good day/night 💕
james x reader requested by anon ~ Okay for the james one from prompt list 2 fluff 5 6 12 13 BEAUTIFUL CMON eheheh love you xx
george x reader requested by anon ~ can i request hufflepuff!reader secretly leaving a cookie/cupcake + a small note for the weasley twins and they love the gesture but fred/george especially adores it bc it reminds him of home then they try to find out who it is and date them 😉 thanks
sirius x reader requested by anon ~ Could you do a Sirius x Gryffindor girl. Mutual pining for years but both are too stubborn to admit it till their 6th year when James and Remus tease him into finally admitting it to her. He does something rlly big and public but soft to admit his feelings.
draco x hufflepuff!reader requested by @bforbroadway ~ Hey! Could I request a soulmate AU (the one where whatever you draw on yourself is in your soulmate) Draco x hufflepuff!reader, and Draco just constantly has little flowers and rainbows and cats and hearts, and just overall cuteness, all over his arms? Just really fluffy 💕 Only do it if you think it will be fun, and keep doing great!
neville x reader requested by anon ~ 2 things 1) ur epic 2) can i have a neville x reader where neville is the herbology professor and reader is the care of magical creatures professer? do what you would like, i just think that would be cool again, ur awseome Lena
Headcannon for remus x reader requested by anon ~ Hey girl 👋 can I ask for a headcanon ? Reader being in love with Remus Lupin but him falling in love with her twin (not identical ofcourse) and dating the twin . Thank you ! Sorry if you don’t like the ask, I’m a sucker for angst and hurt! fics
headcanon for marauders x reader requested by anon ~ heyy, are you taking hc requests? cause i think i'd be really nice a head canon of the marauders meeting reader's (who is a muggleborn) parents
headcanon for marauders x reader requested by anon ~ hey! can i get a headcanon of the marauders having a big fight w the reader (they are wrong, but they only realize later) and then apologizing, angst but fluff at the end?:))) thanks
Sherlock
moriarty x reader x mycroft requested by anon ~ Hiii!!! Can I please request a moriarty x reader x mycroft where reader is moriarty’s partner and she’s mad at moriarty for spending all of his time on his game with sherlock so she decides to play with mycroft to get moriarty’s attention?! Sorry if I couldn’t explain it properly english isn’t my first language! Thanksss!
Mycroft x reader requested by anon ~ What about Mycroft x reader misc. 13? prompt list 1
Marvel
Steve x Avenger!reader requested by ~ @kitkatkl ~ Oooh, are your requests back open? If so, I'd like to request a Steve x avenger!reader where they like each other and the team orchestrates a game like truth or dare to make the reader admit it in some way (because I doubt steve would be down for t/d id he cant even get drunk. If you do do it, you can decide what's the truth/dare that makes them admit their feelings. 💙💙❤💙💙❤
loki x reader requested by anon ~ “Don’t go” as well as “We aren’t meant to be” and “It’s for your own good” with Loki? Maybe ending in fluff somehow? ~ prompt list 1
loki x reader requested by @mojofun ~ So can I ask a soulmate prompt for Loki? (The prompt about the mark)
Undecided Character
Good afternoon darling, May I request fluff 2, 5 and soulmates 1? I hope that's not too much 😅 For the character: your pick 😊 Thank you so much 💕💓 💗 (thehumanistsdiary)
What if, hear me out, “Why can’t I stop crying?” from the first prompt list, and “I let you hurt me because I thought you would hurt less” from the second? For either Draco or Severus? (anon)
requested by @thehumanistsdiary ~ Good afternoon darling, May I request fluff 2, 5 and soulmates 1? I hope that's not too much 😅 For the character: your pick 😊 Thank you so much 💕💓 💗 ~ prompt list 2
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aidanchaser · 3 years ago
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Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Everyone Lives AU
Table of Contents beta’d by @ageofzero @magic713m @ccboomer @aubsenroute @somebodyswatson
Chapter Fourteen The Thief
Even after a few weeks, the tent still smelled like cat litter, and Harry wondered, not for the first time, if he should have asked his parents for their family tent. He had never considered that camping would be part of the hunt for Horcruxes, but Hermione had. She had thought of everything.
Ron returned from the creek and dropped the bucket of water he had gathered onto the table with a heavy thud. The water sloshed over the edges and spilled onto Hermione’s notes.
Hermione jumped up, taking Rita Skeeter’s thick book with her. “Careful, Ron!”
“Sorry,” he grunted, but there was no concern in his apology, and there was no forgiveness in Hermione’s pursed lips as she moved from the table to her bed.
Harry didn’t blame them. They had been living in close quarters, moving campsites every few days, and snatching food and news where they could. Between hunger, radio silence from the Order, and no progress on the hunt for the remaining Horcrux and the sword, they had all grown tense and weary of each other.
“I’ll check the wards,” Harry said, though Ron and Hermione were not paying attention to him.
The fresh air was a relief from the oppressive scent of cat litter, but there wasn’t anything more interesting outside. It looked just as it had when Harry had walked the perimeter of their campsite an hour ago.
The earth was carpeted in crisp brown leaves that rustled as Harry walked. He did not try to muffle his steps; he, Ron, and Hermione had concealed their campsite well. Outsiders could not see their camp, could not hear them, and — after a troubling incident at their last campsite — could not smell anything inside their camp.
The sun was low in the sky, casting a golden glow over the forest. It was nearly dinner time, and Harry wondered what to do about food. He’d been able to use his father’s book to find herbs for seasoning, but he hadn’t found much food to go with them. Last night, Ron had brought back a pair of rabbits that had been the basis for a meager stew, and Harry hoped he could get as lucky tonight. He looked and listened, but saw no signs that there were any creatures nearby. He wondered if the wards that kept people away would also keep animals from venturing too close.
Harry sat down on a half-rotted log and pulled his jacket closed. He watched the sun slip behind the trees and wondered what they would do when winter came, when food was even scarcer and the weather more dangerous.
He rubbed his forehead and tried to massage out his headache. He blamed his hunger for it, not his scar, but it was hard to tell the difference.
At least the dreams of his father had stopped a week ago. Though there had been no news about James printed in the Daily Prophet, there had been a short article in The Quibbler that had told readers how James Potter had been taken by Death Eaters and that his family was desperate for news. There had been no information about Lily and Remus, but Harry hoped that the article proved that they were alive. Only Lily and Remus had known what had happened to James, so who else could have told Lovegood?
Harry was about to stand up and make another walk around the campsite, when pain surged suddenly, sharp and hot. He squeezed his eyes shut and the sounds of the forest around him vanished, replaced with the creaking of old floorboards.
“Give it to me, Gregorovitch.”
The elderly man with thick white hair and a grizzled beard hung suspended in the air, just like that woman over the Malfoy’s dining table. His face was blotched and red — and eye-level. He thrashed in vain.
“I have it not,” he gasped. “No more! It was stolen! Many years ago!”
He stepped closer. Candlelight flickered in the man’s wide, terrified eyes.
“Do not lie to Lord Voldemort, Gregorovitch. He knows… he always knows.”
The vision of Gregorovitch dissolved into darkness, then was replaced by Gregorovitch’s back as he hurried down a dark corridor, a hand-held lantern lighting his way. He threw open the door to a workshop, where rough-hewn branches rested on a work bench and woodshavings had been swept into uneven piles on the floor. The lantern light fell on the window sill, where a young man with thick golden curls perched. With a laugh, the young man fired a Stunning Charm, and disappeared into the darkness.
And then the vision of Gregorovitch suspended by his ankle returned.
“Who was the thief, Gregorovitch?”
“I do not know! I never knew! Just a young man — please, no — please —”
The man begged for his life, but he was silenced with a flash of green light.
Harry returned to the forest, breathless and hot, despite the cold and damp weather. He laid still for a moment, and waited until the pain receded and he could move again. Leaves and damp earth stuck to his face and clothing when he did finally sit up. He brushed them away as best as he could and returned to the tent.
“Find any food?” Ron asked hopefully.
Harry shook his head and took off his jacket. He still felt warm from his vision. “It’s alright — I’m not hungry. You can split what’s left from this morning.”
Hermione looked up from her book and stared at him with a hard, cold gaze.
“What did you see?” she asked.
“Nothing.”
“You’re pale and sweaty. What did you see?”
Ron perked up again. “Was it anything about the Order?”
Harry rubbed a hand over his face. “No. It was nothing, just — he caught up with Gregorovitch. And killed him. That’s all.”
Ron deflated once more, and Hermione frowned.
“Harry, you shouldn’t —”
“Yes, Occlumency, I know,” he snapped. Harry sat down on the bunk that he and Ron shared. “It’s not like I want to watch him murder people across the continent.”
“I think you do,” she said. “You want to know what he’s thinking, what he’s up to.”
He knew the anger that flared in him was not only with Hermione, but with Snape who had once scolded him similarly, but his frustration burst out of him just the same. “Maybe I do, Hermione! Maybe I like knowing that he’s not murdering my dad or capturing my mum! Is there something wrong with that?”
“I think you should be asking why you’re having these dreams again. You didn’t have them at all last year. Don’t you think it’s a bit suspicious that Vol —”
“Don’t say his name!” Ron interrupted with a shout.
Hermione rolled her eyes. “You’re being stupid, Ron.”
“It just feels jinxed, alright?”
Hermione sniffed, but didn’t argue with Ron. They’d had the argument many times already, and no one had come away satisfied.
Instead, she said, “Don’t you think it’s suspicious that You-Know-Who would stay out of your head all year last year, but now that he’s failed to capture you, despite all his control over the Ministry, you’re seeing into his mind again?”
Harry had thought about it. He hadn’t had much else to do except think about his dreams. He just didn’t like the answer he’d come up with.
“I don’t think he’s doing it on purpose,” Harry said. “Sirius said that when he tried to take over my mind it hurt him. He can’t bear being too close to me when I… when I think about the people I love. It worked in Godric’s Hollow, too, when he was… you know, torturing my dad. I was able to shut him out with Mum’s help, and I felt how it hurt him as he pulled away from the connection.” He thought it was also why he didn’t dream his way into Voldemort’s mind on the nights he had slept next to Ginny, but he didn’t dare to say that in front of Ron.
“But why would he start going into your dreams again now?” Hermione asked.
This was another answer that Harry didn’t like. He fidgeted with his wand. “I think it all started now because he split his soul again. It was the first dream I had, of him trying to make the sword into a Horcrux. I think it weakened him more than he’s realised.”
“So you really think that the sword…?” Hermione swallowed.
Harry shrugged. “Regulus seemed certain it wasn’t, but he didn’t explain what happens when an object rejects a soul fragment. I guess it’s never happened before.”
“Maybe it burned up?” Ron poured the bucket of water into the cauldron with a bit more care than he’d shown earlier. “And we don’t have to worry about it anymore?”
“You can’t destroy a soul!” Hermione abandoned The Life and Lies of Albus Dumbledore and pulled Secrets of the Darkest Arts from a stack on the table. “That’s the very reason that Horcruxes work.”
“Then what happened to it? You’re the one who said you can’t fix a tear in your soul unless you feel guilty about it, so what, it’s just floating around out there somewhere?”
“I don’t know! I can’t read about something that’s never happened before!”
The book fell open in her hands, and Harry saw the familiar runes and casting diagrams that Hermione had been poring over for months. His stomach turned as his dream from the middle of summer rose to the surface of his thoughts.
Ron turned to Harry. “What about you? Can’t you dig through his mind and find out what happened to it?”
“I’m not a Legilimens.” Harry didn’t like the defensive note in his voice, but he couldn’t help it. He looked away from Hermione’s book and focused on Ron. “I can only see into his head when he’s really angry, and I can only see what he’s currently thinking about. Don’t you think I’d have dug around to find out where my dad is if I could?”
“I still think this connection is dangerous,” said Hermione, “and if you know how to close it off, I don’t understand why you wouldn’t!”
“You don’t think it’s important to find out why he wants Gregorovitch? You haven’t found any leads in your research, so this is all we have.”
“Well, if your way is working so well, what does Vol —”
“Don’t!” Ron interrupted.
Hermione let out an exasperated sigh and closed her book. “What does You-Know-Who want with Gregorovitch? And how does it help us?”
“He’s looking for something,” Harry ran his hand through his hair, “something that was stolen from Gregorovitch. The thief looked familiar, but I can’t think why…”
Whatever Voldemort was truly searching for, neither he nor Harry were having much luck on their quests. The parallel made Harry uneasy.
“I thought he wanted a new wand,” Harry said, “but in that case he wouldn’t have killed Gregorovitch. Maybe he wants a wand Gregorovitch had already made?”
“Don’t start with that again.” Hermione rolled her eyes.
Harry clenched the edge of the bed. “My wand did something, Hermione. I’m sorry you don’t understand it, and maybe Ollivander doesn’t either, but something happened when we dueled, something outside of my control. It recognised him, Hermione. He knows that, or he wouldn’t be hunting down this thief, he’d be hunting me.”
“Just because you and You-Know-Who believe something happened to your wand —”
“Cedric saw it, too.”
“Well, then let’s just write another letter to Cedric and ask what he thinks!” Hermione stood and folded her arms across her chest.
Harry knew that Cedric’s silence had hurt Hermione as much as it hurt him. Still, he felt the need to defend Cedric.
“Maybe he can’t write to us if he’s being watched, but if we could go to the Ministry and ask him —”
“Yes, that’s much safer than writing letters if Cedric’s being watched.” Hermione’s laugh was sharp and derisive. “Besides, you know we don’t just put ourselves at risk by doing that. We would endanger Ron’s entire family if he’s seen. Truly an excellent plan, Harry. It’s as well-thought out as your idea last week, which was not much more than walking up to the Lestrange estate and asking if they have Helga Hufflepuff’s cup!”
“I don’t see you coming up with any better ideas!”
“Does anyone want to know what I think?” Ron asked.
Harry and Hermione both went silent.
“What do you think, Ron?” Hermione finally asked, though her words were still as sharp as they had been with Harry.
“I think if we can’t get a hold of Cedric, we ought to find Regulus. He knows more than we do.”
“Yeah, Regulus has been really helpful so far,” Harry grunted, and rolled over in his bunk, turning his back to Ron and Hermione.
He did not see how Regulus, who had refused to come to Godric’s Hollow, who had not helped them escape Grimmauld Place, who had an entirely different secret mission from Dumbledore, was any help to them. His story about the locket had been interesting and enlightening, but Harry couldn’t help but feel that Regulus was still lying about something, that he hadn’t told them everything. Regulus’ secrecy bothered Harry as much as Cedric’s silence.
Harry spent the rest of the evening in his bunk, listening as Hermione and Ron portioned out their meager food supply and debated who would take first watch. Harry felt like a poor leader, sulking in his bed, but it wasn’t as if he had anything helpful to contribute.
Their trip to Godric’s Hollow, which had been entirely his idea, had been a waste — a waste that had cost him his father, and possibly his mother and Remus. There had been no Horcrux and no sword. They had come away with nothing but Rita Skeeter’s book, and if it had anything helpful in it, Hermione hadn’t told them yet.
And Hermione was right. None of his new ideas were any better.
Harry had already discussed with Ron and Hermione each of the memories Dumbledore had shown him. Together, they had dissected every place visited and every word spoken, but nothing yielded clues about where a Horcrux might be. The orphanage from Tom Riddle’s childhood had been torn down, Borgin and Burkes’ was too risky a place to keep a Horcrux when one of them might sell it unwittingly, and Hepzibah Smith’s home was currently occupied by her descendants, who had no connection to the Death Eaters.
They had revisited Regulus’ theory that the cup was with Bellatrix Lestrange or Pyrites. Both, however, had spent most of the last sixteen years in prison, and their homes would have been scoured for Dark objects. It was unlikely something like a Horcrux, and all the protections around it, would have been missed.
Harry must have drifted to sleep amidst his thoughts, because the next thing he knew, Ron was shaking him awake to tell him it was his turn for watch.
With bleary eyes, Harry rolled out of the bunk and pulled his jacket back on. He kept his wand at the ready and stumbled outside the tent. The night was brisk and cool, and Harry sat down on the same log he had collapsed on earlier that day. Overhead, a half-full moon illuminated their campsite in a pale glow. The trees looked like dark skeletons, leering in the night. Harry shivered and pulled his coat closer.
His stomach ached with hunger and he regretted turning down dinner. There was nothing in the darkness to distract him from his pain, both physical and mental. It was good news, really, to know there was nothing out there, but Harry yearned for something to occupy his mind, to pull his thoughts away from the weight of his impossible task and his overwhelming hunger. Though it was unwise, and surely Hermione would scold him if she knew, he pulled the mirror out from his jacket and breathed Ginny’s name into it.
Harry’s reflection was replaced by Gryffindor Tower.
The lights in Ginny’s dormitory were dimmed for sleep, but Harry could still make out the mural on the ceiling and the shape of the red canopy over her bed. The curtains were pulled closed.
Harry’s chest ached unexpectedly. Though the mural was different, the colours and style were identical to his own dormitory. The bed curtains, too, were the same shade of red, recognisable even in the dim light.
Harry wondered how empty his own dorm must be. He and Ron were gone, but Neville would be there, and probably Seamus. Had Dean tried to return to Hogwarts? If he had, surely they wouldn’t have let him stay.
He thought about how different things would be if there hadn’t been a prophecy, or if instead the prophecy had been about Neville. Would he be there in that dormitory? Or would he have hunted Horcruxes with Neville, or maybe stayed with his parents to fight?
It wasn’t right and it wasn’t fair that he had to be the one on this quest, that he had to be the one hunting Horcruxes, that his family had to suffer for a choice Voldemort had made years ago.
Light flickered in the mirror, brightening softly. He heard footsteps, and Ginny’s curtains parted.
She had a worn flannel pulled over her, and her red hair was unkempt. She blinked blearily at something outside of Harry’s view.
“Helen?” she whispered. “You’re only just getting in?”
“Oh,” another voice answered, “sorry to wake you. I had Astronomy you know…”
Ginny reached for the wristwatch on her bedside table, and she must have seen Harry in the glass. Her shock was brief, and she looked back at her roommate with a neutral expression.
“It’s nearly four.”
“I stopped to check in on those third years who had detention with the Carrows.” Helen yawned. “I’d better get some rest. We have Dark Arts first thing tomorrow — er, today.”
The curtains rustled as Helen got into bed, and Ginny grabbed the mirror. The surface went dark, and Harry heard a few quick whispered incantations. When her wandlight filled the surface of the glass, Harry noticed that her hair had been brushed out.
He couldn’t help but smile. “Hi.”
“Bit late for a chat,” but she matched his grin. “Everything alright?”
“I just wanted to see you.”
She scrunched up her nose. “Gross.”
He laughed, and it felt like coming up for air. He couldn’t remember the last time he had laughed. “Didn’t you want to see me?”
Her smile faded and her eyes wandered away from him, onto some distant point beyond her bed curtains. “All the time. But every time I find myself wishing you were here, I’m also really glad that you aren’t. It’s awful, Harry.”
Harry understood. He also wished that Ginny were here with him, but he would have been devastated if she had been at Godric’s Hollow. He remembered her offer to help him hunt Horcruxes as soon as she was of age. He fervently hoped that this quest wouldn’t last that long. He didn’t think he could stand this running and hiding for another year.
“That bad?” he asked.
“I can’t even say, ‘At least Snape isn’t teaching anymore,’” Ginny said with a weak, broken laugh, “because the Carrows are worse than anything.”
Harry searched for a more comfortable seat on his log, unsure what to say. He wasn’t used to this side of Ginny. “Worse than Umbridge?” he asked.
She bit her lip, and Harry didn’t need anymore than that to understand.
“I’m sorry.”
She shrugged, and he watched her pull herself together into a more familiar Ginny: strong, flippant, and irreverent as ever. “What about you? Murdered the Dark Lord yet?”
Harry tried to laugh again, but the question wasn’t as funny as she had intended. “We’ve run into a few… challenges.” He told her about their inability to destroy the diadem, their sudden run from Grimmauld Place, and the attack in Godric’s Hollow.
“We didn’t even come close to the Sword,” he said. “And without that, we can’t do much.”
With a confidence Harry didn’t share, she said, “I’m sure your parents are alright.”
Frustration burned inside Harry. His parents were not alright, not even a little bit. Alive, probably, but not alright… But he didn’t want to talk about his parents, and he didn’t want to argue with Ginny, so he let her comment slide. Instead, he asked her what she knew about Gregorovitch.
She shrugged. “Nothing more than what we talked about at the wedding. Are you still having those dreams?”
Harry ignored her question. “He’s looking for something that Gregorovitch had, but was stolen. He’s got to track down this thief. I wish I knew what it was he was after, and why.”
“If it doesn’t have to do with Horcruxes, is it all that important?”
“You sound like Hermione.”
“Good. I’m glad someone with you has some sense, because I know Ron doesn’t. The faster you find and destroy those Horcruxes, the faster all of this is over.”
“And what am I supposed to do? Storm Hogwarts and steal the Sorting Hat to get the Sword? Raid the Lestrange and Pyrites’ estates until I find some stupid cup?”
Ginny pressed her lips together. “Fine. Run off to Germany, then, if that’s what you want.”
“I didn’t say that.”
“Then what do you want, Harry?”
Even in his exhaustion, hunger, and anger, he couldn’t bring himself to lash out with what he really wanted. Not because he had any sort of restraint to his temper, but because his wants were not something he was quite ready to voice, not even to Ginny.
They were the same wants he had seen in the Mirror of Erised when he was eleven. He’d kept them to himself all these years, hoping that he would eventually grow out of them. But he hadn’t. He was still a stupid child, wishing he could change the past.
Harry bit down on his tongue and looked out into the night. The sky was still dark, and he wondered how much longer until his watch was over. He wondered how much longer until breakfast.
“I should let you get back to bed,” he said. “Sorry I called.”
When he looked back down at her, she was glowering at him. “If you’re so sorry about it, why’d you do it in the first place?”
“I didn’t mean that —”
“Didn’t you? I grew up with six older brothers. I know when I’m being left out.”
“You’re upset that I’m leaving you out of a dangerous quest because you aren’t of age?”
“I’m upset that you’re keeping secrets from me.” The acid in her voice was not uncharacteristic, but Harry was not used to being the target of it, even when she was frustrated with him.
“I’m not keeping secrets, I just… I don’t want to talk about some things.”
“Do you want me to help or not? I know I can’t do much, but I want to do something, even if it’s just listen.”
Harry rubbed his eyes. “I promise when I’m ready to talk, you’ll be the first one I talk to. Is that enough?”
“I don’t have much choice, do I?” And the mirror went dark, and Harry was left staring at his own dim reflection.
He replayed the conversation, trying to think of what he should have done differently. He wasn’t sure. Part of him knew he had misstepped, but he also felt like Ginny had overreacted, though he couldn’t even identify why she was so angry, let alone find a measure of how she ought to have responded.
He sat in the cold, mulling over their conversation for the duration of his watch, until the sky finally began to lighten. It transitioned from deep violet to soft lavender and finally turned dull grey. The grey seemed static and unchanging, and gave the forest around them an eerie feeling, shadowless and vague in form. When the sun finally broke the horizon, the tent opened.
Hermione came out with a cauldron in one hand and Rita Skeeter’s book in the other.
“Quiet night?” she asked as she knelt beside their makeshift firepit.
Harry made a noncommittal gesture, then waved his wand to bring over some of the larger pieces of wood he and Ron had gathered the other day.
“We ought to move sites today,” Hermione said, and set the cauldron up over the fire. Soon, the smell of fresh coffee wafted through their camp, and Harry’s stomach twisted painfully.
“We can use the Cloak to get some food,” he said.
Hermione pursed her lips. Harry knew that she didn’t like the risks of using the Cloak, but he didn’t like wasting their Polyjuice potion.
“Have you had any ideas for where to go next?” she asked.
Harry shrugged. “I still think we should talk to Cedric.”
“We wrote three letters, Harry. Either something’s wrong and the Order doesn’t know it, or he can’t talk to us safely and showing up at the Ministry is too big of a risk!”
“Well, unless you’ve found something in Rita Skeeter’s book, we don’t have any other options. We’ve been wandering for weeks, Hermione. We need to do something.”
Hermione looked down at the heavy text. “It’s… not a lead exactly.”
“Wait — you really found something? And you didn’t think to bring this up yesterday, when we were discussing what to do?”
She clutched the book against her chest as she used her wand to portion coffee into three battered tin mugs. “Discussing is one word for what we were doing,” she mumbled.
“Hermione!”
“You won’t like it.”
Harry was desperate enough to like anything that might give him a clue about what Dumbledore wanted him to do. Even if it came from Rita Skeeter.
With a sigh, Hermione handed the book to him. She had her thumb in a chapter titled, “The Greater Good,” located near the beginning of the book, and indeed it noted that Dumbledore was hardly eighteen at this point in the biography.
Hermione was right, as usual; Harry did not like the information in Rita Skeeter’s book. Skeeter described how Dumbledore’s mother had passed shortly after he had finished his education at Hogwarts. He had been forced to abandon travel plans in order to return home and care for his younger siblings. In true Rita Skeeter fashion, she questioned Dumbledore’s compassion for his brother Aberforth and sister Ariana, and described Albus as someone interested in nothing more than his own achievements. She suggested that he resented this return home, and Harry thought that it was unfair to suggest that having complex feelings made Dumbledore a terrible person.
But that wasn’t the worst of the chapter. Most damning was her description of Dumbledore’s relationship with Gellert Grindelwald.
Harry’s stomach turned, not just with hunger, as he read how Dumbledore had developed a friendship with Bathilda Bagshot’s nephew, before Grindelwald would go on to become one of the most feared wizards in the world. Rita Skeeter had included copies of letters between the two young men, in Dumbledore’s own hand, discussing how important it was for Muggles to be ruled over by wizards. It was for their own good, of course, but that only made Harry angrier. Rita Skeeter even suggested that Grindelwald or Dumbledore were responsible for Ariana’s death. She claimed that this abrupt end to their flourishing friendship in the wake of Ariana’s passing was the very reason Dumbledore had waited years before confronting Grindelwald, and that inaction made Dumbledore personally responsible for the deaths of thousands across the continent.
Harry struggled to bury the anger and indignation that welled up inside of him. He wasn’t very successful. “Why did you want me to read this, Hermione?”
“Do you see the mark at the bottom of Dumbledore’s letter?”
Reluctantly, Harry flipped back to the letter. He fought against the revulsion that welled in his stomach as he skimmed its contents until he found what Hermione was talking about. There, in place of the “A” in Albus Dumbledore’s signature, was a triangle with a sort of eye inside of it.
“Isn’t this what Lovegood wore to the Weasley-Delacour wedding?” he asked.
“It’s also in the book that Dumbledore left me in his will. The Tales of Beedle the Bard. I can’t find this sign anywhere in my runes or syllabary books, though. Do you know what it means?”
“Krum said it was Grindelwald’s sign. Maybe Grindelwald stole it from Dumbledore.”
The note at the bottom of the letter mentioned there were more letters and photographs in the middle of the book. Harry turned there, to see if the symbol was repeated elsewhere, if there might be another clue. Instead, he found a photograph of two young men, one with close-cut hair and the beginnings of a goatee, the other clean-shaven with long curls that bounced as he laughed. Harry stared at them. Fresh from his vision just last night, he recognised the young man instantly: the thief from Gregorovitch’s memory.
Though Harry had a feeling that he already knew what he was looking at, he checked the label on the picture. It was, as expected, Albus Dumbledore and Gellert Grindelwald, arms around each other, laughing. Harry was all too familiar with the fondness in young Dumbledore’s face as he smiled at Grindelwald. It was the same fondness Harry had felt towards Cho, towards Ginny, and towards Cedric.
Harry knew, suddenly and certainly, that this very relationship, this one intimate summer, was why Dumbledore had been so wary of Harry’s relationship with Cedric, and why Dumbledore had warned Harry against writing encoded letters about Horcruxes to Cedric. Dumbledore’s own letters were proof of his regret.
Harry tossed the book back to Hermione. It landed on the ground with a loud thud and skidded dangerously close to the fire before Hermione snatched it back up.
“What is it?” she asked.
But Harry didn’t know how to answer her. He was having a hard enough time sorting it all out in his own head. He got to his feet and paced along the edge of their warded campsite.
Last year, Harry had seen first hand how Remus and Sirius’ suspicion had torn apart their friendship. He had been determined not to make the same mistake, and that had led him to trust Snape, despite all his instincts and evidence. He had trusted Snape because Dumbledore himself had trusted Snape.
One of the last things Dumbledore had said to Harry was, “I have not always trusted the right people, and it has left me with my share of regret.”
Dumbledore had been too trusting, had put his faith in Grindelwald and in Snape, but Remus and Sirius had not been trusting enough, and had ruined their friendship so fundamentally that seventeen years had not been enough time to reconcile.
So where did that leave Harry?
Was he right to keep faith in Cedric? In Regulus? Neither of them were here, and he had depended on them both so much more than he could describe.
“Harry,” Hermione said in a careful voice, “Dumbledore was young when he wrote that letter. He was a different person —”
“He was as old as we are, wasn’t he?” Harry snapped back.
Do you know what this old man has sacrificed in his quest for justice?
Had the locket known about Ariana somehow? About Grindelwald?
Harry rubbed his scar as it prickled. Regulus had said that the diary and the locket could only have learned information fed to them. Maybe someone had fed the locket a story about Dumbledore, something to make Harry doubt him.
Harry didn’t want to doubt. He wanted to trust. He wanted to have faith in his friends, in the man Dumbledore had become.
What was it the Prewett brothers had said? ”A man like that doesn’t get to be a man, not even to his friends.”
He sank back down onto his log and hung his head. He had no choice but to admit that he did not truly know Dumbledore, and never really had.
And now he was faced with a choice: Did he trust Dumbledore, who had given him this quest, who had taught him about Horcruxes and how to destroy them? Dumbledore, who had once loved Grindelwald, and had been afraid of Harry’s relationship with Cedric. If Harry chose to trust Dumbledore, did that mean he had to trust that Dumbledore had been right about Cedric? Or could he somehow trust both of them?
He didn’t know how to talk to Hermione about this without getting into another fight. They were so tired and so hungry all of the time. He wished he could talk about it with Dumbledore, or even with Cedric. But all he had was Ron and Hermione.
Harry ran his hand through his hair and stared at the campfire. “Why are we doing this, Hermione?”
She blinked at him. “Why are we hunting Horcruxes?”
“We abandoned our families. We abandoned our friends. Why? Because Dumbledore asked us to?”
Her lower lip trembled and her eyes watered as they did every time their conversations got close to her parents. But she tightened her hands around the book and swallowed down her tears. It was a familiar transition to Harry by now, to watch Hermione go from grief to determination with an ease that he envied.
“Because this quest is important. Because we didn’t want to put anyone else in danger. Because we don’t want anyone else to get hurt.”
He ran his hand through his hair. He had hoped she would have had a better answer than that, but he supposed that there wasn’t one. The fewer people who were at risk on this quest, the better. He had known it all along, but he had just wanted Hermione to tell him something different.
Ron came out of the tent, drawn straight to the scent of fresh coffee. He downed it quickly, despite it being fresh off the fire.
“What’s the plan today?” Ron asked.
Harry let Ron and Hermione debate where they would go next. He sipped his coffee in silence and tried not to think about what he knew had to come next.
After some discussion, they settled just outside of a small village in North Yorkshire. Harry used the Cloak to slip into town while Ron and Hermione set up the campsite. He left money on the counter in exchange for food and snuck a copy of the Daily Prophet. He would have preferred a copy of The Quibbler but those were subscription only, so they would have to get lucky finding one.
Harry flipped through the paper as he returned to their campsite. His face was not on today’s front page, but there was a sheet slipped into the folds of the paper with his photograph and the reward for his capture: ten thousand Galleons. On the back of the sheet were his parents, Remus, Sirius, Hermione, and others in the Order. Harry couldn’t decide if James’ presence on the list was good news or bad news. It meant that the Death Eaters had not publicised his capture, which meant that they probably still had a plan for him.
Harry returned with the food, and soon the smell of eggs and sausage filled their campsite, thanks to Hermione’s hard work. She was good at Charming the food to stretch it, so that what Harry had bought could last them over a week instead of just a few days.
“So what next?” Ron asked as they ate.
Harry swallowed down a bite of eggs and tried to swallow his annoyance with it. It wasn’t like they had gotten any better ideas since he had asked that question before they had moved campsites, or last night, or last week.
Well, Harry did have one new idea, but he didn’t think Hermione would like it anymore than she had liked his other ones, so he said nothing.
“What do you know about this symbol, Ron?” Hermione asked, and showed him the letter from Dumbledore.
Ron shrugged his shoulders. “Never seen it befo — Oh, is that the same one Lovegood wore to the wedding?”
“Supposedly it’s Grindelwald’s sign, but somehow I can’t see Lovegood wearing it for that reason. And Dumbledore’s using it here, long before Grindelwald rose to power. So it must mean something else…”
“It’s not in any of your books? You brought a lot of books.”
“If it was in my books, I would have said so.”
“Are you sure? Did you check all of them?”
Hermione slammed The Life and Lies of Albus Dumbledore shut. It cut through the silence of the forest, and Harry hoped their protective charms had been placed properly.
“Yes, Ron, I checked all of them. But I will gladly check again if it would make you happy. No one else seems interested in doing any of the work on this quest, I suppose.”
“You’re the one who brought the books!”
“And I’m the one doing all the cooking and picking campsites and setting watch —”
“I’ve found plenty of our food!”
Harry reached for Hermione’s bag and dug into it. He had sort of hoped she was too involved in her argument with Ron to notice, but she quickly turned on him.
“What are you looking for, Harry?” It was strangely accusatory, rather than curious.
Harry didn’t answer her. He searched through the bag, feeling past her stacks of books, until his arm was fully inside. Finally, his fingers brushed the cool metal band. He pulled out the diadem.
Harry stared into the blue jewel that sat between the eagles’ wings. “We don’t have the Sword, and we can’t get into Hogwarts for basilisk fangs without alerting Snape. What are our other options?”
Ron looked at Hermione.
She bit down on her lip. “We’ve been over this. Horcruxes are very well-protected. It has to be something with incredibly rare counters or cures.”
“Such as?” Harry prompted.
Hermione looked between Ron and Hermione. “Well — Fiendfyre, for one, but none of us could use it because it can only be countered by someone who’s been Burned by it before. And cockatrice blood is fatal just by inhaling its scent, but it’s also a Class-A Non-Tradable substance and some say it will even combust if you try to contain it. Yes, there are ways other than the Sword of Godric Gryffindor, but they’re all just as difficult to get and more dangerous to have!”
They had reached this part of the conversation several times. The trio had talked circles around destroying the diadem and finding the cup. There was no safe starting point. They had to commit to one path, and no matter what they decided on, it was going to put them at risk. Harry couldn’t see any other choice.
While Ron continued to argue with Hermione about who in the Order they might be able to talk to about locating the Lestrange estate, Harry thought about the symbol in Hermione’s book, and the risks he was asking of Ron and Hermione. He thought of the bounty on Hermione’s head, just for being associated with him. He thought of the ghoul in Ron’s attic, and how that lie was the only thing keeping Ron’s family safe.
Harry stared at the diadem in his hands and thought about his parents, captured or missing, and how alone he felt.
It wasn’t just because he had lost his parents. It wasn’t because he was fighting with Ginny. It wasn’t just because Cedric had abandoned him. Even now, sitting by the campfire, while Ron and Hermione argued about how to ration their food, he felt painfully alone.
They didn’t have the weight of destiny, of being marked by Voldemort. Maybe it was childish to wish it away, but Harry also understood, far better than he had at eleven, exactly what his scar meant. It was not a path anyone could walk for him.
A year ago, Cedric had told him, “The prophecy only says you have to face Voldemort. It doesn’t say you can’t have help.”
But his parents had tried to help, and it had only hurt them. Ron and Hermione were here, trying to help, and wherever they went next would put them at risk.
Harry rubbed his thumb over the blue gem. Maybe Cedric had been wrong. What did Cedric know of prophecies, anyway?
Harry tucked the diadem into his pack. He knew what he had to do. He also knew that Ron and Hermione would never understand it.
Later that night, Hermione woke him for his turn at watch. He waited until she was sound asleep, then grabbed his pack, scribbled a quick note, and he left.
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imaginejamesandsirius · 5 years ago
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Soulmate au where Sirius has James's name on his wrist, James thinks he has no soulmate, until BAM! He finds it in some unusual place for a soulmark and there's Sirius Black's name.
Young Sirius Black had a name printed on his wrist, a thick cuff bracelet to cover it as all soulmarks were, and a belly full of hope: James Potter. His parents tried to tell him that soulmates didn't make them automatically allies, but he knew that was only because the name on his wrist was someone from a family they didn't like. Regulus didn't have to deal with any of that, and when they thought Sirius wasn't listening, they told their second son all about soulmates and how they'd always be there for him. So yeah, Sirius knew they were lying to him in the hopes that he'd manage believe them this time. 
When James Potter introduced himself, with a large grin and thick rimmed glasses and messy hair standing out like they were too big for the rest of his body, Sirius smiled back and said his name, hoping for a reaction of some sort. He didn't get one. 
They talked on the train ride to Hogwarts, and it became increasingly obvious that James didn't recognize him. It was a terrible feeling, realising that James didn't have his name. Sirius belonged to James, that much was clear. It was like a deep feeling seeped into his bones, this knowledge that he belonged to James. He wished that it went both ways, that James belonged to him too. 
That would've been nice.
*
"D'you have a soulmate?" Sirius asked out of the blue one day. 
"Nope," James admitted easily. He didn't seem very down about it, but Sirius definitely would've been in his place. Maybe that was because he knew who his soulmate was, though. 
"Do you wish you had one?" 
"Eh." James shrugged, frowning at a blot of ink that landed on his parchment. "I guess? It sounds nice, the way people talk about it, and my parents are soulmates, but it's hard to miss what you've never had. What about you?" 
Sirius blinked. "I have a soulmate." It would be easier if he didn't maybe, but he also wouldn't give up James's name on his wrist. 
"Really?" James asked, more surprised than he should've been considering how close they were-- Sirius ignored the fact that this was his first confirmation that James didn't have a soulmate so there was no reason for James to know anything about his. 
"Yeah." He tried to inject enough casualness into his voice that James wouldn't pry further, and it worked. 
*
It had been six and a half years since Sirius met James. And with every buggering year that passed, it became more and more bloody obvious that James didn't have Sirius's name for a reason. James readily admitted that he didn't have a soulmark, but that wasn't what did it; Sirius kept fucking up. Because Sirius wasn't a good person. If he had one main trait, it would be selfishness. He kept pulling James into pranks even though he was Head Boy-- and okay, it's not like James really fought him on it, but he also wasn't instigating anymore, which meant that if Sirius didn't suggest it, they didn't do anything-- he did that thing with Snape a couple years ago that had nearly killed Remus and James, and he kept sabotaging James and Lily's relationship. It's not like he put it in his mind to do it, but that's always what ended up happening. Which sucked. Because James was getting mad at him, and Lily was actually pretty cool which just made it worse (she seemed to think it was a sort of hazing that she had to endure to prove she could be part of the group, and that was the same way Sirius attempted to justify it to himself before Remus had flat out said, "Stop trying to break them up, James is still your best mate and that's not going to change because he's dating someone. Sirius could have stood for his subconscious taking it to heart but whatever). 
Anyways, James didn't have his name because Sirius was a complete and absolute berk who didn't deserve being shackled to him for the rest of his life. 
*
"Sorry," Sirius said as soon as he sat on the couch. 
"Should I be worried?" Lily asked, her tone flat as she showed how clearly she wasn't worried. 
Sirius snorted. "This is going to be the beginning of a great new friendship." 
"Between you and...?" 
"You." 
Lily looked up from her book at that, blinking at him guilelessly. 
Fuck she really didn't know. Sirius thought by this point everyone knew he was in love with James, even though neither Remus nor Peter had come out and admitted as much to his face. And if she didn't know that, did she have a reason for why he was being such an arse, or did she just think that's how he was? Either way, that behaviour was coming to an end. Sirius gave her a smirk that looked more like a pained grimace; he wasn't used to apologising even though he had plenty to apologise for. "I've been an arse and I'm sorry. Worried you were going to take James from me, y'know?" 
"Not judging, but that's kinda stupid. I'm his girlfriend, you're his best mate. It's not like we're both dating him or summat." 
That hurt more, but if she hadn't noticed before, she wasn't going to notice now. "Yeah I figured that out. Rather," he added with a dramatic eye roll, "Moony got so annoyed that he whacked me over the head with his History of Magic essay until I listened to him. I haven't been very nice to you. I'm surprised he hasn't killed me for it yet, to be honest." 
"I didn't take it personally," she said with a shrug. "I'm not sure you like anyone other than James. And occasionally Peter and Remus," she tagged on thoughtfully. "Anywho, you will be forgiven shortly, just as soon as I believe it won't keep happening." 
"Well here's hoping I don't reclaim being a dumbarse." 
Lily chuckled. "Here's hoping." 
*
James showed up on Sirius's doorstep, one hand stuck in his hair like he couldn't bear to be in a normal stance. There was a nervous energy about him, but it wasn't tragic like they'd lost somebody else in the war. "What's wrong?" Sirius asked when he came in, barely finishing the second word before James was blurting out an answer. 
"Lily's pregnant." 
Sirius's heart stopped. When it started again, it was painful where it beat in his chest, like his ribcage had shrunk at the same time his heart grew and now it was strangled but trying desperately to continue on like nothing had changed. "What?" 
"So we're- y'know- getting married only she wants to have it soon, like before she starts to show at all, so I was thinking you could help." 
"What?" 
"To, y'know, throw the wedding together. I have no idea what goes into it, but you're my best man so you'd have to help anyways, right? And you always pick good flowers and shite, so it makes sense to apply it to weddings, y'know?" James was saying 'you know' a lot, like maybe if he said it enough, Sirius would stop being confused. 
"Best man?" Sirius repeated dumbly. He'd never felt like his heart had been ripped out of his chest before. He wouldn't recommend it. 
"Lily's kind of freaking out, so Marlene and Mary and Dorcas are all at our place comforting her, and they sorta kicked me out, so like, I dunno, maybe they're planning it so you won't have to?" 
Did James think the best friend of the groom was traditionally the one to plan the wedding? Or did he assume that Sirius was going to do it because he was used to Sirius taking care of things? "James," Sirius said, and James looked over at him like he was hearing him for the first time since showing up. "Pregnant?" 
"Hmm? Yeah, apparently condoms aren't a hundred percent effective, who knew? And her birth control pills aren't very reliable, guess we had an unlucky night, you know? She's only two months in, so we've got a month to the wedding, if that helps." 
Pregnant. And all James had to say about it was that they had an unlucky night? Sirius frowned. "James, do you want to marry her?" 
"We're having a kid, we're going to be a family." He stated it like fact, and Sirius took a grounding breath and let it go. If he argued this and won, then what? Lily would have to raise a kid by herself, James would be miserable with guilt, and for every minute afterwards, Sirius would have to wonder if he did it for James's sake or his own. 
"Yeah, I guess you're right." 
Unfortunately, now that James was paying attention, he was really paying attention. He caught the strange note in his tone and asked, "What do you mean?" 
Sirius shrugged, the lie coming out of his mouth before his brain thought of it. "Her soulmate." 
"Shit. I didn't even think about that." James rubbed at his forehead, but he wasn't dissuaded from the whole idea, Sirius could tell that much just from looking at him. "We'll deal with it when she meets him, but right now there's a baby on the way and we have to think of the sprog first. Besides, she probably won't meet him for years, so we'll be out of the war and the baby will be older and- I mean, everything will be easier, then, you know?" 
No. "Sure." Things weren't going to be easier in three years or twelve, but at least there wouldn't be a war on. Their issues would be smaller, but it wouldn't feel any better for James to be dealing with it. 
*
Lily and James were both in hospital, and Sirius was taking care of Harry while the remaining Death Eaters were rounded up. It was pretty easy since he'd learned all his babysitting talents alongside James's self imposed parenting lessons while Lils was pregnant. Harry was easily entertained by Padfoot, but getting to sleep and waking up were the absolute worst. Harry knew Sirius, no question, but he always wanted Lily when he woke up, and he wanted one of his parents (sometimes both) when he was going down. Sirius wasn't getting much sleep, but it was more than he'd gotten while pulling shifts at the Auror's office in the day then running for the Order at night. 
Harry's soulmark was barely starting to develop, on the bottom of his right foot. It was little more than a grey smudge at the moment, but by his second birthday, the name would be clear. Harry would learn first how to write his name, then how to write his soulmate's. That's how Regulus had learned, and Sirius knew he would've done the same had their parents not been so hellbent on him not attaching himself to James. As always, the thought made him snort in amusement; they'd never been able to control him, not from the moment he was five years old and decided their rules were stupid and outdated. 
Sirius ruffled Harry's hair as he played with two stuffies, his hair already dark and thick on his head. 
*
James was gingerly getting out of the shower when he saw his soulmark for the first time in his entire life. Lily was probably still on the couch, too weak to make it further on her own. He'd offered to help, but they'd separated while hiding from Voldemort in that small house, and things were still awkward between them. Knowing that they cared about each other but weren't in love was just... it made sense but he was never going to admit that to her. 
While in hospital, they'd shaved his head so they could do some sort of surgery or potion soaking, he had no idea. One of the side effects was getting the chills at all times of the day, so he'd had a hat on the whole time. No one that talked to him had seen it, which was why he was frozen in shock when he saw dark writing on the side of his head in the mirror. 
He shuffled closer, tilting his head and leaning in until he was nearly pressing his face against the cool surface. It was hard to read from this distance and with it backwards, but it was a name he knew as well as his own: Sirius Black. 
Sirius? But-. It made sense-- it definitely did, the knowledge that Sirius was his soulmate clicked into place like it had always been there-- but why hadn't Sirius said anything? Sirius knew where his soulmark was, he knew who it was, and he hadn't said anything. James had thought he didn't have a soulmate, but with his name on his wrist, Sirius had proof that he did, so why didn't he tell him? Sure they'd been eleven at the time they met, but Sirius didn't know that James thought he was without a soulmate until they were fourteen; that was three years of being best mates, where Sirius could have told him and didn't. 
He wanted to grab his wand and apparate over to his flat and demand answers, but even with all the healing potions and the two week long stay in hospital, he couldn't move very quickly. It took him far too long to towel dry, and even longer to get his fumbling limbs through the proper sleeves. He pulled the hat on automatically, paused, then pulled it further down. He wasn't ashamed, but he was still too damn cold all the time and if Sirius hadn't told him, he must have a reason. 
James made his way out of the loo and over to the living room. Lily was sitting on the couch, but she'd changed. "How do you feel?" 
"Like I nearly got cut in half," she said, because that was basically what had happened. How she survived it long enough for help to arrive was a mystery to everyone, including the healers. "You?" 
"Like I'm walking through ice." Both for speed and the bloody temperature. "You okay if I go visit Sirius?" 
Lily shifted, then grimaced and held a hand to her stomach. "Try calling him, I'm not sure travelling that far is a good idea." 
They'd both been banned from floo travel and any apparation up to a certain range. Flying was, of course, out of the question. James sighed, knowing she was right. "Yeah." He turned and started hobbling towards his room. It took a while, but he made it, landing on the armchair with more force than he should've allowed himself. He tapped the mirror and waited for Sirius to answer. Harry should be in the middle of his nap, so hopefully there wouldn't be any way for Sirius to get out of talking to him. 
"Hey, what's up?" Sirius asked, his smiling face replacing James's in the mirror. 
"Who's your soulmate?" he blurted out, not wanting to deal with small talk when he could only think about this one topic. 
Sirius blinked, smile fading quickly. "What?" 
"Your soulmate, who is it?" 
"It doesn't matter." 
It doesn't matter. His soulmate was James, and he was saying that it didn't matter. To his face. Well. A little disconnected, but it was still to his face. "How can it not matter?" 
Sirius shifted uncomfortably. "It just doesn't. Since when do you care? We've talked about it, like, twice and it was ages ago. Nothing's changed. At the end of the day, everything is just as it was when we first met, and nothing's every going to come of-" 
"You're full of shite." 
He blinked, taken aback. "I- what?" 
"You heard me, you're full of shite. You have my name, that changes things." 
Sirius's eyes went wide, and he broke the connection. 
"Wait, don't-" 
His face faded entirely from view, and all that was left was James scowling at himself. 
"Bugger." This is why he'd wanted to speak in person. Disapparation was going to be better than trying to floo, so he stuck his head out his door and yelled, "Lily, I'm going to talk to Sirius!" 
"Can't it wait?" she called, only she was smart and used a spell to amplify her voice instead of trying to shout. 
"No!" 
"Fine, but I won't visit you in hospital, I just got out!" 
"That's fine!" Then he closed his door and turned on his heel, appearing in Sirius's living room with a pop. He turned in a circle looking for him, and he stumbled to a halt when he saw him in the kitchen, hands planted on the counter and looking half furious, half miserably sad. 
"You know James," he said, voice low and hurt, "when I ended the conversation, it meant I didn't want to talk about it. It didn't mean 'come over and bother me when you should be home resting'. What are you doing here?" 
"I think it's pretty obvious." 
"You could've hurt yourself. Go back home." 
"And risk hurting myself further? That's not a very good plan." 
Sirius glared at him, but his expression still had that edge of being indescribably upset with him. James had no bloody idea why he looked like that, and that's why he was here. 
"I'm not leaving until we talk about this." 
Sirius swallowed thickly, and even from this distance, James could see his adam's apple bob with the motion. It looked like he was going to say something, so James waited. It took him another minute to figure out what he wanted to say, and his voice was hoarse as he asked, "How'd you find out?" 
James blinked. Of all the things he'd expected to hear, that was not one of them. How the hell did Sirius think he knew? There was only one way for him to know, and Sirius wasn't stupid. 
"I never told anyone," he continued, staring down at the empty counter with unseeing eyes, "and it's not like you've talked to my parents about it. Did you just- figure it out? I was obvious, right?" He gave a humorless laugh. "Too obvious. There's- there's no way you barely figured it out. You must've known for a while." He swallowed again. "Are you taking Harry?" 
James blinked, tried to figure out what the hell he was talking about, then blinked again when nothing came to him. "I have no idea what you're talking about." He walked closer, then pulled the hat off. It felt weird to have his head so uncovered, but it was important for Sirius to see his soulmark. James turned so the mark would be facing Sirius and tapped his finger against it. "I thought I didn't have one." 
Sirius blew out a harsh breath. "Yeah that's because you d-" he stopped abruptly. He must have looked up and seen what James was showing him. "What is that," he whispered. 
"Soulmark." James glanced at him out of the corner of his eye, then put the hat back on to face him. "I never saw it, obviously. By the time it formed I had hair and I never had any reason to chop it all off." He rubbed at the spot on his head through his hat. 
"So- what? You're here to tell me that we should hook up?" Sirius asked incredulously, tears brimming in his eyes. "Did you forget that you're married? You have a family, remember?" 
"Lily and I split." 
Sirius scoffed. "Right cause that's so much better. Being your soulmate rebound." He wiped harshly at his eyes. "No thanks." 
"Months ago. We split before the attack," he added so it made more sense, "months ago." 
"You don't want me James," he said, the admittance sounding too much like heartbreak. "You didn't want me before, and you don't want me now. Go back home. Nothing's changed." 
"Home is where you are." 
Sirius started shaking his head, and when he looked up again, he was angry. He was crying, but he was pissed off. "You're a fucking liar James. I've always needed you a hell of a lot more than you've needed me and everyone's always known that. You moved on. You got buggering married and had a kid, you bought a house, you- and look at me!" he yelled throwing his arms out to gesture to his flat. It was the same one his uncle had given him his last year of Hogwarts, and he'd never bothered to make it truly his. It had his shit in it, and that was it. He didn't redecorate, he hadn't hung up any art or bought a different couch from the one that had been in it since the beginning. 
"There was a war, you didn't have time to-" 
"I had time," Sirius cut in, expression twisting, "but I kept hoping you'd come back and tell me we should get a place. Getting everything I want, aren't I?" 
James walked over and pulled him in a hug. 
"What're you doing?" Sirius asked, pushing weakly against him. 
"You were making me sad," James mumbled, holding him tighter. "You talk like I don't care about you, and you're a second choice to the family I wanted." 
Sirius sniffled and didn't say anything. 
"Like I didn't choose you first. Before we got married, Lily, she- she told me that she knew you were first to me. She didn't even care, can you believe that? It's been obvious all along that we weren't going to end up together. Hell, the only reason we got married was because she got pregnant." 
"Yeah well. That's great for you." Sirius raised his arms to hug him back and turned his face into James's shoulder. 
James sighed, knowing that he'd have to admit something he'd planned on keeping to himself for his entire life, if he wanted Sirius to believe that this wasn't some instant love soulmate bullshit. "I never told you how I felt-" 
Sirius snorted, and James ignored that. 
"-because I knew you had a soulmate. You told me what it meant to you, and I just- I didn't think I could handle that: having you only to lose you the moment you met them. I thought it was for the best." 
"Liar," Sirius said, but it was less accusing than it had been before. "You- you never- it-." 
"I love you," James whispered, and the words hung in the air as tangible as an owl. 
Sirius shivered. "You can't be kidding, James. Not now, not about this." 
"I'm not. I love you, and we don't have to jump into this, but I missed you so buggering much. Not getting to see you every day was torture, please let me stay. Actually," he amended a second later, "you should come home. Me and Lily have missed Harry, and I know you like our place better than this." 
"I don't think Lily would be okay with me moving in," Sirius protested, but it was weak; he wanted to be convinced. 
"Lily likes you better than me," James said. It was a little strange that that was true. "If I'm still living there, you can definitely live there." 
Sirius said, "You're such a prick," but he relaxed against James. 
151 notes · View notes
inthewild-flowers · 4 years ago
Text
fic masterlist!
This is a masterlist of all my fics. Most of them can be found on AO3, although there is a Tumblr Drabble section at the end.
I’ll be updating this every time I post a new fic/finish posting a multi chapter fic. Enjoy!
Oneshots
Weak In The Knees
Rating: General Audiences
Ship(s): Remus Lupin/Sirius Black
Word Count: 575
Summary: Kind of just a whole lot of Wolfstar fluff. There's dancing involved.
Other: Maybe a muggle au?? I’m not entirely sure tbh, pretty cute if I do say so myself, the title comes from the Serena Ryder song weak in the knees.
Bright Yellow Ducks
Rating: General Audiences
Ship(s): James Potter/Lily Evans, background Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Word Count: 2114
Summary: Lily works at a corner store, and one day the Marauders walk in on a quest for ice cream.
Other: Muggle au, I’m pretty sure it was based on a post I saw but I wrote it a few years ago so I’m honestly not sure
Earth Angel
Rating: General Audiences
Ship(s): Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Word Count: 674
Summary: I love fics where Remus is just an absolute angel, so here’s my version of that. Sirius has a crush on the cute guy who works at the bakery in his neighbourhood and finally get a chance to talk to him.
Other: Remus works at a bakery au, I wrote this after reading The London Underground Book Of Love by Children_of_the_Shadows on AO3 (absolutely would recommend, it’s amazing) and it’s probably one of my favourite fics I’ve written, the title is from the song Earth Angel by The Penguins
Gilderoy Lockhart Is A Dick (But His Dickery Has Some Interesting Consequences)
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Ship(s): Remus Lupin/Sirius Black, background James Potter/Lily Evans
Word Count: 2699
Summary: When Remus finds out Gilderoy is cheating on him, the next thing he has to do is find out who he's cheating with. And if that person happens to be Sirius Black, well, Remus is okay with that. Based off of the joke me and my sister have about Legend of Korra: both of Mako's girlfriends leave him for each other.
Other: Muggle au, funny, crack fic, way more sex jokes than I usually write but it fits with the whole vibe of this fic
Text Me
Rating: General Audiences
Ship(s): Remus Lupin/Sirius Black
Word Count: 566
Summary: Written for girlwithacrown’s finish this fic challenge. My take on the second half of “Remus is a bookstore owner and Sirius comes in looking for a book during coronavirus lockdown” (might wanna read her first half tho lol).
Other: Here is @girlwithacrown ‘s first half of the fic, and here is her collection with the other fics that people wrote for their own versions of the second half!
Padfoot Won’t Leave
Rating: General Audiences
Ship(s): Remus Lupin/Sirius Black
Word Count: 2453
Summary: At the end of Harry's third year, Remus and Sirius have a plan to get Harry away from the Dursleys.
Other: crack fic, I tried my best to make it funny, someone sent a post to the wolf star games 2020 discord that said that there aren't enough “Sirius makes himself at home at the Dursley’s house because there’s nothing they can do to make him leave” fics and then we as a group decided to fix that. Here’s the collection of fics we wrote for it! :)
Rooftop Ramblings
Rating: General Audiences
Ship(s): Aziraphale/Crowley
Word Count: 526
Summary: Aziraphale and Crowley share a cigarette on a rooftop, and wish that things could be different.
Other: pining, the whole plot is literally just pining, written for a dtiys based on this art by @whiteleyfoster
yoga (sirius’s way)
Rating: General Audiences
Ship(s): Remus/Sirius
Word Count: 1043
Summary: Remus decides to start doing yoga to get some exercise during quarantine, and naturally, Sirius wants to try as well.
Other: Quarantine fic!!, domestic fluff, inspired by this art by @gaeilgelupin
two bros, going on a brocation, five feet apart cause they’re not gay
Rating: General Audiences
Ship(s): Remus/Sirius
Word Count: 1927
Summary: In which Sirius takes Remus on a surprise Christmas vacation
Other: Christmas fic!!, so much fluff, :))
🎶 Remus is a swearwolf 🎶
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Ship(s): Remus/Sirius, James/Lily/Regulus
Word Count: 2694
Summary: Regulus sighed. “Come on, Sirius, let’s get you off this thing and then you’ll feel better.” They pried Sirius’s hands off the bar and helped him out of the rollercoaster, where he stood for a moment on shaky legs, clutching Regulus’s arm.“I’m going to get some mint chocolate,” he declared once his legs had regained some of their strength, “and then we’re going to the haunted house and I’m getting my revenge.”
Other: A sequel to ice ice baby by @pan-and-ready-to-stan, 90% banter, a LOT of swearing, fluff
would it kill you if we kissed
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Ship(s): Remus/Sirius
Word Count: 1741
Summary: Sirius leaned his head against the window and let his eyes flutter shut. Maybe if he slept, some of the horrible things would go away. Maybe if he slept, he would wake up to find that he was just on a normal road trip with one of his best friends. Maybe if he slept, he could forget the reason he was here at all.
Other: hurt/comfort, and also getting together!! bc I love get together fics :)
(i thought) i knew you 
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Ship(s): Remus/Sirius
Word Count: 1432
Summary: Sometimes Sirius thinks that he might be okay. That maybe he’ll make it through this. He’s broken up with people before, hasn’t he? He’s been heartbroken before, and he’s always made it through. He’s survived so many things in his life that it seems silly that this would be the thing to break him.
Other: oh boy is there angst, that’s it that’s the fic just angst, there is a hopeful ending though??, there’s some super vague sort of references to self harm but it doesn’t like. happen
Got It
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Ship(s): Remus/Sirius
Word Count: 2859
Summary: Remus pushed down the butterflies in his stomach and accepted the vape when Sirius offered it, inhaling deeply and pointedly not thinking about how Sirius’s lips had been there just moments before. This was the closest Remus would ever get to kissing him. No, he told himself sternly, don’t think about that. It didn’t work. It never did.
Other: texting, fluff fluff fluffity fluff, getting together, written for marauders pride fanzine
in a cottage on a cliffside
Rating: General Audiences
Ship(s): Remus Lupin/Sirius Black
Word Count: 2865
Summary: “Are you cold?” Remus asked. “I’ve got another blanket somewhere…” he trailed off, looking at Sirius expectantly. Sirius shook his head.
“I’m fine.” he smiled again, then took another sip of his tea. He made the same face as before. It was adorable.
“Why are you here?” Remus asked. Sirius blinked at him.
“I wanted to see you.
Other: this was a birthday present for a friend, its fluff and a bit of pining and just generally soft :)) also a get together fic
The Year Remus Lupin Made Friends
Rating: General Audiences
Ship(s): Remus Lupin/Sirius Black
Word Count: 3546
Summary: James was sixteen years old, and it was summertime. Sirius and Pete were staying with him, Pete for a week, Sirius for the whole summer and hopefully every holiday after it too. James wanted to play quidditch, but the risk of being seen by muggles was too high, and his parents wouldn’t allow it. James was also very stubborn. His parents should have known to keep a closer eye on the boys, but some things can’t be helped. Here is what happened:
Other: written for a discord server secret santa. very marauders friendship focused, but also wolfstar at the end :))
In the dark and in the dusty sunlight
Rating: General Audiences
Ship(s): Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Word Count: 1099
Summary: “I thought we were past such formalities, Lord Lupin.”“Indeed we are, Sirius, but it did feel right in the moment. You know,” Remus gave him an appraising look, and Sirius shivered, “you look rather like a painting, lying there like that.”“My dear Remus, we know very well that I am a work of art.”Remus laughed. “Yes, that has been well established.” He took off his hat and placed it on a table, then crossed over to the windows. “May I?” he asked, gesturing to the curtains.
yall its gay historical pining thats it thats the summary
Other: its just,,,, a period drama. thats it. I wrote a scene from a period drama just for the pining.
Multi Chapter Fics
Love At First Hot Chocolate
Rating: General Audiences
Ship(s): Sirius Black/Remus Lupin, background James Potter/Lily Evans
Chapter/Word Count: 5 chapters, 5069 words
Summary: 18 year old Remus Lupin works at Starbucks. He hates it. He hates that he has to talk to people and be nice. He hates making coffee (although he doesn't mind the hot chocolate). But one day, Sirius Black walks in. For Remus, it's love at first sight. But does Sirius feel the same way?
Other: Muggle au, sort of a coffeeshop au in that they meet at a coffeeshop but otherwise it’s not it there much, fluff, might have been inspired by a post I saw a few years ago about Remus working at a coffeeshop and always getting Sirius’s name wrong?? But again, I wrote this a few years ago and don’t really remember lol
I Hope That I Don’t Fall In Love With You
Rating: General Audiences
Ship(s): Sirius Black/Remus Lupin, James Potter/Lily Evans
Chapter/Word count: 2 chapters, 1431 words
Summary: James is getting married, and Sirius worries that he won't get to see his best friend anymore. One night, he vents his feelings to a cute stranger at a pub, who happens to be in a similar situation.
Other: Muggle au, title from the Tom Waits song I Hope That I Don’t Fall In Love With You
If You Want To Buy Me Flowers
Rating: General Audiences
Ship(s): Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Chapter/Word Count: 3 chapters, 1499 words
Summary: Remus owns a flower shop. Sirius is breaking up with his boyfriend using flower language.
Other: Muggle au, Remus is a florist au, inspired by a post I saw about flower meanings, title from the song Two Princes by Spin Doctor
Don’t Shoot The Messenger
Rating: General Audiences
Ship(s): Remus Lupin/Sirius Black, James Potter/Lily Evans, Alice (I don’t know her last name)/Frank Longbottom
Chapter/Word Count: 16 chapters, 13,192 words
Summary: Ever since his first year at Hogwarts, Remus Lupin has been exchanging messages with someone on a bathroom stall. Neither of them know who the other one is, and now that they're graduating soon, they want to find out.
Other: Muggle au, modern au, Remus isn't part of the Marauders au, a bit of texting
Love Through The Ages
Rating: General Audiences
Ship(s): Sirius Black/Remus Lupin, some vague background James Potter/Lily Evans
Chapter/Word Count: 4 chapters, 2213 words
Summary: Remus finds a love letter that Sirius wrote to him two centuries previously and never sent.
Other: They’re vampires au, I guess technically muggle au??, fluff, love letters, confessions, inspired by this post by @kayvsworld
“No, Sirius, tying the stems of flowers together will NOT make a flower crown”
Rating: General Audiences
Ship(s): Remus Lupin/Sirius Black
Chapter/Word Count: 4/4 chapters, 4247 words
Summary: In which Sirius can’t make a flower crown, Remus thinks Sirius might be flirting, and James has no clue what’s going on.
Other: so much fluff, oblivious James, inspired by this art that I love a lot by @girlwithacrown
Hogwarts, 1993
Rating: Teen and Up Audiences (this may change, I don’t have the fic planned out at all, so it could end up with a G rating, but I’ve rated it T just to be safe)
Ship(s): Remus Lupin/Sirius Black
Chapter/Word Count: 7/? chapters, 7248 words as of October 4 2020
Summary: When Sirius escapes Azkaban and goes to Hogwarts, instead of lurking around as the Grim like a FOOL, he decides to seek help from an old friend.
Other: I don't have any warnings for this one yet, but I’ll put them in if necessary. I’ll be posting the chapters as I write them, and I’ll try to make sure it doesn’t take too long.
the doc was called halloween babeyy
Rating: Teen and Up Audiences
Ship(s): Remus Lupin/Sirius Black, James Potter/Lily Evans
Chapter/Word Count: 6 chapters, 1240 words
Summary: a self indulgent halloween fic with pumpkin shenanigans, meet cutes, and texting. 
“They’re battle scars,” Remus repeated. “And you can’t call him just ‘pumpkin’ anymore, his official title is the PumpKing and he requires it to be used at all times.” Remus finished carving out the last scar, and picked up the sharpie to draw the outline of a crown near the top of the pumpkin. One he was satisfied, he picked up his knife and started cutting along the lines.“In that case,” James said, “Mine’s the PumPeasant and he looks like this because of a childhood disease.”
Other: ‘tis all fluff :))
a very (in)effective seduction
Rating: General Audiences
Ship(s): Remus Lupin/Sirius Black
Chapter/Word Count: 10/? chapters, 9557 words
Summary: In which Sirius decides that it's time to seduce Moony. Yes, he has a list
Other: written for girlwithacrown and kidovna’s blissember chirstmas prompts! get together, fluff, etc.
Note: I will finish this eventually, but I was struggling a lot with writing it, so it may take some time. I do have it sort of planned out, and once I have the motivation to write it again it shouldn’t take too long to finish :))
dreaming of you
Rating: Teen and Up Audiences
Ship(s): Remus Lupin/Sirius Black, Dorcas Meadowes/Marlene McKinnon
Chapter/Word Count: 6/? chapters, 4932 words
Summary:
 french bitch: I have arrived
french bitch: paris has gained a resident and he is magnificent
sweet sweet moony: paris is usually referred to as she
french bitch: HOW DARE
Jimmy: he does have a point tho
or: Sirius is in france on his study abroad year, remus is pining, and James and Peter are enjoying the chaos
Other: texting, fluff, theres eventually gonna be wolfstar and dorlene and either jily or jegulily I haven’t decided yet
You Hold The Key To My Heart
Rating: Teen and Up Audiences
Ship(s): Remus Lupin/Sirius Black, James Potter/Lily Evans/Regulus Black
Chapter/Word Count: 38 chapters, 26 049 words
Summary: Sirius threw himself on his bed, not caring about how he must be wrinkling his clothes. In fact, he relished the idea. At least his parents would have a reason to be angry with him today. He stayed there, thinking about soft curls and a sweet face that he barely caught a glimpse of, until the sun was shining directly through his window and James arrived to help him dress for dinner.
Or, a victorian au in which Remus is a gardener, Sirius is a dramatic rich kid, and they fall in love.
Other: I wrote this for the 2020 wolfstar games. it’s mainly fluff, but I also got to indulge my love of historical things which was amazing :D
Series
Dan’s cute & short wolfstar fics with no plot that make them happy to write :)
Rating: General Audiences
Ship(s): Remus Lupin/Sirius Black
Number of works: 4
Complete: No
Works in the series:
Goodnight Moony - Remus doesn’t want to go to bed. Sirius thinks Remus should go to bed. 201 words.
Snow - It’s literally just Remus and Sirius enjoying the snow, that’s it, that’s the fic, please enjoy. 124 words.
I Just Called To Say I love You - Sirius calls Remus the night before a big exam. 174 words.
Lupin Can’t Sing - Please read the title to the tune of “lupin can’t sing, lupin can’t sing, lupin cannot sing!” from AVPS. Remus is drunk and trying really really hard at karaoke. 409 words.
Ruby Tuesday - Remus and Sirius cuddle and listen to Ruby Tuesday. It's very cute, if I do say so myself. 259 words.
HP Pride Month 2020!!
Rating: General Audiences
Ship(s): Remus Lupin/Sirius Black, Lily Evans/James Potter
Number of works: 4
Complete: Yes
Other: All the fics in this series were written for @girlwithacrown ‘s HP pride month prompts, and you can find other fics written for those prompts in her collection on AO3!
Works in the series:
Coming Out - Remus and Sirius decide to tell their friends they're dating. 1035 words.
Flag - Sirius and James make unique additions to their pride flags, and at the pride parade they see two other people with matching flags. 1126 words.
Family - Sirius runs away from home. 898 words.
Healing - Remus's dog gets hurt, and the vet is way hotter than Remus was prepared for. Sirius may or may not have Ted from Schitt's Creek vibes. It was mostly unintentional. 1012 words.
Working Title: Summertime
Rating: Teen and Up Audiences
Ship(s): Sirius Black/Remus Lupin, James Potter/Lily Evans
Number of Works: 2
Complete: No
Works in the series:
Forgiveness & Friendship - The summer after sixth year (and The Prank, you know which one. The one with Snape. And Remus.), Sirius shows up on James's doorstep. 13 chapters, 4437 words
Mischief & Matchmaking - The marauders (+ Lily) are spending a few weeks at James’s house, and oh boy is there a lot of sexual tension there. Peter decides to do something about it. Featuring: shenanigans and three separate tropes cause why not. 17/17 chapters and 6772 words.
dan?? writing angst?? it’s more likely than you’d think
Rating: Teen and Up Audiences
Ship(s): Remus Lupin/Sirius Black
Number of Works: 3
Complete: No
Works in the series:
stardust is easily lost - He kisses him because he loves him, because loving Sirius is a habit he’s never been able to break, not in school when he thought loving Sirius would kill him, and not now when he thinks that Sirius might kill them all. It keeps him up at night sometimes.
cascade - Teaching at Hogwarts is equal parts wonderful and miserable. He loves his students, but some days he looks at them and he sees himself, happy and carefree, with his best friends at his side. Those days are the hardest.
the death of a star - And sometimes, Sirius almost seems like his old self again. Sometimes, his mischievous grin that Remus remembers all too well will appear on his face, and he’ll lean over and whisper a snide comment in Remus’s ear, and Remus will have to try to stifle a laugh.
Other: yall this is angst, there is major character death, its A Lot, theyre also down in the Tumblr drabbles section & their titles are all variations of “angst babeyyy”
dan is a) yearning and b) obsessed with dorlene and bookstores
Rating: General Audiences and Teen and Up Audiences
Ship(s): Marlene McKinnon/Dorcas Meadowes
Number of Works: 3
Complete: No
Works in the series:
1. Walking In a Winter Wonderland – As they skated, Marlene couldn’t take her eyes off of Dorcas. She knew that they were holding a conversation somehow or other––about Dorcas’s job at the bookstore, she was fairly certain––but her brain was on autopilot as she watched the lights dance across Dorcas’s face, lighting up the night like miniature stars.
2. adventures pertaining to love actually (and also shrek) – The woman shook her head solemnly, but a smile tugged at the corners of her mouth. “You absolutely cannot.”They grinned at each other for a moment, then the woman’s eyes flicked up to the clock on the wall and she swore. “I’ve got to go. It was nice talking to you! And you’ll have to tell me what you think of that movie if you watch it!”“I will!” Dorcas called after her, and the woman waved as she hurried out the door.Well. She sure hoped that Love Actually was on Netflix. (note: this one is set before the first fic in the series)
3. it can't be hard to find a present right?? (wrong) – “What’cha got there?” Frank flopped into the chair beside Dorcas and took a sip of his coffee, eyeing the mess of yarn on her lap with curiosity.
“It’s not weird to make her a scarf, is it?”
“...to make who a scarf?”
“You know exactly who I’m talking about.”
Other: yeah im just being generally fluffy and self indulgent here, enjoy! :))
Tumblr Drabbles
“It’s three in the morning” - jegulus
“This is the opposite of what I told you to do!” - wolfstar
“Do you have a ride home?” - wolfstar
“Come cuddle” - wolfstar
“I am home” - dorlene
“I’m getting married? Since when were you choosing my future spouse?” - wolfstar
“Another bad date?” - jily
James and Remus being very very chaotic bros
24 hour diner au - wolfstar
they have the same favourite chair - wolfstar
Sirius loses Remus’s present (and James helps him look) – wolfstar
when she wears YOUR flannel shirt - dorlene
when you can’t choose just one snuggly blanket so you wrap up in all of them - the marauders
angst babeyyyyyyyyy - first war wolfstar
2 angst 2 babeyyyyyyyyy - poa wolfstar
angst babeyyyy 3.0 - ootp sorta wolfstar
high school/college minifest day 1: back to school - wolfstar
high school/college minifest day 2: detention - wolfstar
remus has whipped cream on his face and sirius canNOT handle it - wolfstar
hufflepuff remus who makes friends with the marauders - wolfstar
dorcas is hurt and marlene is taking care of her - dorlene
remus is a lil shit (back hugs prompt) - wolfstar
just friends booty shorts - James and sirius
night at the museum au - wolfstar and jily
39 notes · View notes
foxymuses · 5 years ago
Text
an incomplete list of headcanons for sirius black:
there was a period of about 6-8 months between running away/being disowned and receiving his uncle’s inheritance when sirius had absolutely nothing to his name but the misc junk he’d shoved in a bag when he left the house to go to james. the potters, ignoring sirius’ claims they didn’t have to, bought him a moderate amount of items including but not limited to clothes, school materials, and various items for the room he’d already claimed at their house. when his inheritance kicked in, he tried to pay them back. they refused.
sirius was always more afraid of his father than his mother (which is the opposite of regulus). the reason is that his mother was more concerned with appearances outside the family, but was content to simply act as if sirius didn’t exist when they were at home, which was fine for both of them (and on some occasions, the worst that would happen is she’d scream and yell and be generally unpleasant, and true she’d be the one to force a hair cut or destroy his ‘revolting’ muggle/gryffindor items). however his father was the disciplinarian. his father rarely raised his voice, but was the first to raise a hand or wand to correct behaviors or punish misbehaviors, and though sirius would stand up for himself and was not scared into silence, there were many instances where he would show up to the potters in the middle of the night, or return from mandatory holidays during the school year, with signs of magically induced injury.
following that, sirius is always the first to jump to the defense of others, completely disregarding his own safety or the danger of the situation, and has been known to laugh in the face of those that think they can fight him, and generally doesn’t react to anyone who rises to attack him either verbally or physically, but whenever his father even shifted slightly, sirius would tense and brace, and there were several instances in public where a disagreement would start and though often the marauder’s were nearby and out of ear shot, they’d know things were going poorly because sirius, who never ever shows fear to anyone, would flinch
it’s clear from prisoner of azkaban that sirius could have escaped at any point. all he did was become padfoot and get past the dementors who weren’t looking for or caring about animals (literally his words). there is no true reason he had to wait twelve years except for dramatic story telling. that being said, the shock of the situation prevented any of this from logically settling in his mind for the first few weeks, and then after that, the dementors and their constant soulsucking presence did make it easier for sirius to blame himself for james and lily dying. he convinced them to make their secret keeper peter instead of him, he didn’t try hard enough to keep them safe, he should’ve actually killed peter, fuck what’s happening to harry, where is he, does anyone care about him, is he being taken care of, what’s remus doing, does remus think sirius did it, does remus hate him, is remus okay, it’s another full moon please let remus be okay, fuck if he gets out he’s going to strangle peter --- on and on, and it definitely gave him a huge amount of guilt on his shoulders, and regret, and despair, and while i personally don’t think it would have taken him 12 years to finally fucking decide to leave, it definitely did take several, especially since telling time within the walls of azkaban is near impossible
ON THAT NOTE, HOWEVER, it is this very guilt and anger that allowed him to muster the determination to finally fucking escape. even amidst all this guilt and fear and sorrow, sirius was strong enough to stay sane under the influence of the dementors and his own perceived failure, that he consciously made the decision to trick his way out. it was this very fury he felt towards peter and the injustice that he suffered because of his coward of a supposed best friend that fueled sirius’ ability to withstand the trails of being a prisoner at the worst wizarding prison. once his guilt subsisded enough for pure unadulterated hate to seep in, it was just a matter of deciding the best time to stage an escape
I REPEAT, I DO NOT BELIEVE IT TOOK HIM 12 YEARS at most, i would figure, personally, it happened in four or five. which, while following my canon divergent main verse, would still allow time for sirius to clear his name and fight for custody of harry, which he does successfully, by my canon, when harry is about seven. SO EVEN IF sirius isn’t instantly cleared as my main verse would like, he still winds up a single dad.
he has horrible nightmares after azkaban, regardless of when he gets out or how long he was there or whether he ends up raising harry. i personally would have it so that he and remus end up living together, both because sirius has his inheritance to support them, and because they’re the last two marauders and trusting others is hard for sirius to come by after everything, so living with remus is Safe and Easy, and he does everything he fucking can to make up for all the full moons he missed, but regardless of how Hard he tries to get back to some semblance of a normal life, he has severe ptsd from prison and he doesn’t sleep well and he doesn’t eat much and he drinks more (in verses where he doesn’t have custody) and he smokes a shit ton more and he spends more time as padfoot than he does as a human because being a dog is just so much simpler and he has fewer worries, and remus is fucking worried as shit about him because sirius was always the strongest of the four of them (fight me on this i dare you) and to see the confident, arrogant, and generally easy-going carefree rebel that was sirius black in school turned into a jumpy, irritable, shattered shell of himself is hard and sirius never truly recovers from that damage, he just gets better at hiding it, and he does a hell of a lot better at healing when he does have custody of harry because harry gives him purpose in a way that remus can’t.
when sirius inevitably comes across peter again, he does try to kill him. whether he genuinely fails or subconsciously stops himself because peter, as much as sirius resents and hates and would love to grind him into little rat pieces, was a friend and was someone sirius trusted and cherished and would have protected with his life, and no matter how much he very much wants to kill the bastard, he can’t
shifting gears a bit, but sirius had never and still doesn’t really see himself ever getting married. he never even wanted kids until harry came around, and even then, the only kid he’ll ever have is in my canon divergency where he raises harry himself. in that verse he is more open to a co-parenting relationship (re: when he’s with @gavrele‘s gabe, or if he were to be with remus or another marauder’s era character who survived either by au or in canon), which can be considered romantic or merely a mutual desire to raise this orphaned child, but in that instance, he still probably wouldn’t want marriage, because it makes him seriously uncomfortable just thinking about it, and at the very most he would just agree to mutually wear signifying rings but not actually make it official, so that way if at any point he does feel weird about it he won’t feel bad about taking the ring off for a few days until the feeling passes
he learns of regulus’ dying while he’s in azkaban and listen canon sirius was very ‘meh’ about the whole deal, which really pisses me off, so my sirius was very torn. and it doesn’t help that most people just write reggie off as disappearing, they don’t know the story, they just assume he died in the war or voldemort disposed of him or something, doesn’t matter, he learns that regulus is gone, and his father is gone, and his mother ends up dying shortly before he gets out, and sirius is alone really and truly, and when he returns home for the first time in years, he manages to convince kreacher to explain the situation because even if he doesn’t particularly like kreacher, they both loved regulus, and sirius crafts a makeshift grave for his brother which he visits reguluarly, and though he doesn’t usually say much except “hey reg”, the first time he broke down sobbing because he tried so hard to get regulus to see the right side of the war, but he didn’t try hard enough, and he should’ve worked harder to keep reg safe, what an awful brother he was, he only ever thought of himself, if he just took regulus with him when he ran away maybe they could’ve avoided this, fuck he’s sorry he fucked up, he’s so proud that regulus stood up to voldemort in the end, he doesn’t care if it was for selfishness or fear or whatever, he’s so proud, he wishes regulus would know how proud he is
he actively keeps harry as safe as possible, doesn’t let half the shit that happens happen to him, fully supports and listens to him whenever the kid says ‘something is going on”, talks with him through it, tells him all the stories of james and lily that he can, never treats harry as less than his own blooded son because to him harry is his son, but he also never tries to replace james with himself, and harry knows how much sirius loved james and lily and how sirius only wants harry to be safe and happy, and merlin did he cry the first time harry called him dad and told him that he knows sirius isn’t his real dad but its okay to have more than one dad, he still loves james too he just loves sirius as much, and when he saw sirius almost crying, he asked if that was okay, and sirius could not express how absolutely perfect that was and later when talking to remus, remus had to hold a conflicted sirius for at least half an hour because he adored the idea but god he misses james so much, he wishes this wasnt the situation but it is and fuck it hurts (remus is uncle, by the way)
he literally stands between snape and harry, and dumbledore and harry, and does not let lucius anywhere near harry (and only allows cissa after a tentative no-children meeting, where they agree to not be enemies but rather awkward cousins like they are, and sometimes even let draco and harry play together) and harry is raised knowing about the prophecy, and since he’s raised in the wizarding world he’s not a commodity, by the time he starts hogwarts, everyone has kind of gotten over the hype so he can be mostly normal, and yeah strange things keep happening but the second harry tells sirius (because harry is raised in an open and loving environment where talking about things is encouraged), sirius does shit about it, and yeah voldemort wasn’t vanquished, he is still waiting, and sirius can’t be everywhere, but when harry says voldemort is back, sirius fucking rallies and essentially one-man-armies the ministry into fucking doing something about it because he lived through that hell in his last few years of hogwarts, he lost friends to it, he is not going to watch it happen again and nothing is going to hurt harry period
naturally, this means he doesn’t die in the department of mysteries because when the dreams start happening, harry talks about them with him, and they work it out together.
sirius doesn’t get a job because he doesn’t need one, and all of harry’s inheritance from james is purely harry’s, sirius doesn’t touch an ounce of it, and in fact regularly adds to it of his own inheritance, but sirius is seen roaming random places offering assistance, usually in regards to muggle nonsense (think hands on mechanics stuff) because he’s good at it and he doesn’t know what to do with his time, but he never lets them pay
he helps fund the weasley’s prank store. ron is a little odd, and hermione is sometimes annoying, and boy does he have a soft spot for neville because sirius knows about his parents, and you can bet that rather than lifting the map from filch, sirius straight up gave it to fred and george, and remus later confiscated it from his now-permanent DADA position (or whatever position remus wants, tbh) and sirius got an earful before telling remus he knew the other would give it back to them, which he did
i could continue but i should probably start another post to do so SO THERE YOU ARE
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limetimo · 2 years ago
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RAB fics I read this week (23-28aug)
Meetings That Start In The Dark by writingamarie hmm yeah okay so this one is really good but also mind the tags because Walbrga's A+ parenting is truly horrifying, and when Orion took over I cried on the floor. But a lot of good things happens between the holidays, namely slowly developing Jegulus!
The stars still shine for you by Anonymous smut with plot, Remus/Sirius/Regulus (Dom/switch/sub) in this order. They're soulmates but that's more like plot device x to get them fucking than an actual plot point
to the dark lord by justwhatialwayswanted AYYY Regulus isn't amused by the Voldy vs Dumbledore war and starts his own movement! Equal rights for all ya all I really enjoy his 5D chess thought processes
Snakes and Lions by Moony_Reggie yeah okay so Remus is a sexy sexy Slytherin motherfucker, Regulus gets bumped up a year, and the Black brothers are total gay disasters
i see how this ends (poorly) by Quillium SEER REGULUS ALSO I AM IN LOVE WITH EVAN ROSIER I WOULD DIE AND KILL FOR EVAN ROSIER
Letting Go of Lost Things by doshu for vocatives im screaming did you want Dark Regulus? did you want tragedy? here you have dark, dark regulus and tragedy
of wedding nights and family traditions by phoebusapollo (bloomylele) James has a surprise for Regulus on their wedding night, gratitious smut
The Little Prince by phoebusapollo (bloomylele) Regulus is the Prince of Slytherin... and by prince I mean a beloved whore, the bicycle of the common room.
Cause They Taste Like You by Xiphchrys Gay Regulus drunkenly hooks up with Lily, and works himself up in an anxiety attack over James being bi (and therefore, contrary to previous belief, available)
Is It Me? by Xiphchrys aaaaaaaaaaaaa hurt no comfort
The Truth is Subjective by iwasbotwp Peter/Regulus, now that's a rare pair am I right. Very neat, I liked it a lot
Honey Pot by wintergreen825 Peter/Regulus, short and sweet (or is it?)
bruises on my knees for you by SinSmith it's Sirius/Peter actually but it starts with Regulus making out with Peter behind the Quidditch stands!
James, Regulus.. by Xiphchrys :D :D :D Walburga sent Regulus to France to the Potters to put a pause on her son being gay until she can find him a suitable wife. It really, really did not work out the way she thought it would. Jegulus! Black brothers reunion! fun times! Regulus standing up to Walburga!
Wormtail Gets Some Tail by Anaxandria for penultimatepenguin Peter is not interested in dating people who don't appreciate rats. Most people don't appreciate rats or rat facts. Regulus does tho ;D
Games in the Marauders' dorm really do bring brothers together ;) by ddavidson851 drinking games and black brothers making up!
Life and Struggles of James Potter by Pietra_Thorn This is about James (single dad James!) but he lives with Peter and Regulus
Keys To My Heart by marshland04 :D :D :D baseball AU! Secret identity! mutual pining! Black brothers reuniation!
sooner or later (it's over) by leftsidedown for allalrightagain aaaaaaaaaaaa peter/Regulus, a love story in reverse
Only a Matter of Time by DemiSebbi Regulus and Barty smut
Regulus' guide to getting good tips by orphan_account James is very horny for the guy doing his piercing!
The Marauders and the Prisoner of Azkaban by SilverShadow1 MArauders and Lily and REguls reading PoA!
speak to me by Anonymous James sleeps with Regulus behind Sirius' back but it's ok because it doesn't mean anything (a lie)
The cottage by Lupin_Black_kid CUTE jegulus
the hold you have on me by mcplestreet amoretia jegulus fic
Rebels by DarkWitchOfErie :D jegulus then Jily then jegulily in which regulus deflects, hides at Potter's, and Young Order kicks Voldy's butt ♥
i was a knife in a gunfight and i fought so madly by justprompts Regulus: Sirius wake up i killed someone Sirius: cool cool cool just be quiet don't wake up the lads James, Peter, Remus: Um kinda late for that, are we hiding a body or what?
The Incalculable Power by Warriora Harry and Draco get yeeted to the 70s, Regulus doesn't have much of a role yet but he has a pair of lungs on hims and two volume settings only
and I Looked Back on a Broken World by raziella hermione and harry get yeeted to the 70s!
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ourloveisforthelovely · 4 years ago
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On the Mend. Part 2
Harry Potter AU
Link to Part 1 
Pairings: Regulus Black x Reader. Sirius Black x Remus Lupin 
Rating: M- later chapters
Song in Chapter: The Night We Met by Lord Huron 
______
I am not the only traveler Who has not repaid his debt I've been searching for a trail to follow again Take me back to the night we met
And then I can tell myself What the hell I'm supposed to do And then I can tell myself Not to ride along with you
I had all and then most of you, some and now none of you Take me back to the night we met I don't know what I'm supposed to do, haunted by the ghost of you Oh, take me back to the night we met
When the night was full of terrors And your eyes were filled with tears When you had not touched me yet Oh, take me back to the night we met
I had all and then most of you, some and now none of you Take me back to the night we met I don't know what I'm supposed to do, haunted by the ghost of you Take me back to the night we met
Walking into the house, you immediately smelled Regulus’ cologne. You fought the urge to turn and run out of the house. It didn’t matter how much your heart was screaming to run to the man and never let him go. You had to think with your head this time. Renee deserved that much. She didn’t deserve to be torn between two parents. The child also didn’t need to see Regulus hurt you over and over again.
Your mind was also on Ambrosia Parkinson...Black...whatever her last name was now. What if she and Regulus repaired their relationship? Would she be unkind to Renee? What if she wasn’t? The 13-month-old wouldn’t be able to tell you if her stepmother was cruel. Would Regulus even pay enough attention to notice anything strange? Something told you, no.
The better question was how would Ambrosia handle the news that Regulus had a child with another woman? You smirked at the thought of the whole Black family having a major hissy fit because Regulus royally fucked up. Regulus went and knocked up the “Potter girl.” You could see Walburga’s scowl in your mind. The horrible woman would either be on the floor screaming or burning Regulus’ name off of the family tapestry. What a scandal that would be! Sirius was already gone, now her youngest “good” son had sunk to a whole new level of low.
Regulus was lucky that James wasn’t alive right now. Your older brother would have probably tried to kill him by now. James would definitely not sit back and leave it to his best friends to help raise Renee. He would have gone to Grimmauld Place and hexed Regulus until he left Ambrosia to take care of his responsibility.
You had to shake the thoughts of James from your mind. If you wanted to face Regulus and not be sobbing you had to stop thinking of your brother. Regulus didn’t deserve you taking that wrath out on him. He didn’t have anything to do with James or Lily’s deaths.
The hallway to the sitting room was dark. You took a few deep breaths before stepping in. Both Regulus and Remus immediately stood when you walked in. Regulus was paler than you remembered as he opened his mouth to speak a few times but nothing came out. He was still the same handsome boy that you loved so much.
Your attention went to Remus, who was nervously looking between the two of you.
“Remus, we have insurance on this place...right?”
Remus nodded, slightly confused.
“Yes. Why?”
You reached over for the vase that was sitting on the table beside you. Right away you started throwing whatever you could get your hands on at Regulus. Whether it be the shock of you coming after him so violently or something else, Regulus didn’t move quick enough and was pelted by several objects. Finally, he resumed his quick seeker’s reflexes and started smacking stuff away from him as you tossed it.
Remus jumped back, not about to get hit before yelling for Sirius. By the time Sirius put the baby in her playpen and ran into the living room, you had your wand out and was hurling hexes at Regulus. Sirius blinked a few times as Regulus quickly dodged whatever you threw his way.
“A little help here?”
Regulus snapped toward his brother, who shrugged.
“She’s being a lot nicer than I would be.”
Sirius wasn’t about to step in on this one. In his mind, you deserved the right to do whatever you wanted. Remus, meanwhile, quickly wrapped his arms around you from behind.
“Think about Renee. I know that you are hurt and angry but this is her father. Please...this is not you Y/n.”
He whispered in your ear. Remus kept his voice low enough so that only you would hear. You trembled a few times before lowering your wand and putting it in Remus’ outstretched hand. Remus gave you a gentle smile before turning to the wrecked living room.
Regulus meanwhile, looked slightly scared as you turned to face him. He expected you to be hostile but he didn’t expect to get attacked. This behavior wasn’t you. Regulus decided that he had himself to blame for this extreme change in character and he hated it!
You were still the beautiful girl that he had fallen in love with during 6th year. Everything about you was the same. You still had those hazel eyes that could change shades by your mood. There were those full lips that were screaming to be kissed. Everything about you was what Regulus wanted and needed. Only now he was afraid that you would never accept what he had to offer...which wasn’t much.
“What are you doing here?”
You asked, coldly. Regulus regained his calm composure. Moments before he was close to panicking himself. There was no way that he had control of what you had just done to him but maybe if he could just speak...
“I needed to talk to you.”
You narrowed your eyes.
“There are letters and telephones. Both of those work nicely.”
“And you would ignore me.”
Regulus replied. You shrugged.
“Most likely. It would be your own fault. When will you learn foolish boy that if you play stupid games you will win stupid prizes?”
Sirius leaned back and held a hand up.
“She’s got a point.”
Regulus glared at his older brother.
“I didn’t come to talk to you.”
Sirius smirked as you turned back to Regulus.
“You should go home to your wife and be a good husband. I have nothing to offer you.”
You actually had a lot to offer him and both of you knew it. After some time of healing, you could open your heart to him again and love him as you did. There wouldn't have to be any more hiding in the shadows to kiss your lover. You could kiss and hold him as you so desperately wanted to.
He left you! He left you for some pureblood princess who his FAMILY found acceptable. It didn’t matter then that you are a pureblood and it won’t now. Regulus didn’t stand up for your love then why would he now? Don’t let him hurt you again!
Your mind hissed.
It didn’t take Regulus knowing everything about you to know that you were giving yourself some little pep talk that was geared against him. If he could just gain control of this conversation….
“You actually have a lot to offer me. I’m not married to Ambrosia anymore.”
“That’s a pity.”
You muttered before turning and taking the glass of water that Remus was holding out to you.
You actually have a lot to offer me.
You internally snorted at the thought. The only thing that you had to offer him was the heir that sat in the other room happily playing with her blocks. Hell would freeze over before you let the Black family sink their claws into your precious little girl.
Regulus only blinked. He expected your sarcasm to be thrown his way.
“Not really. I didn’t want her anyway.”
You turned.
“Where was that attitude before? I’m sure your mummy is having a fit about her little splendid plan falling apart.”
Regulus frowned.
“I didn’t come to talk about my parents.”
“Well, I don’t know what you want from me, Regulus. You made your feelings quite clear. I loved you. Now you're just a page torn from the story that I’m living.”
Remus, meanwhile, motioned Sirius out of the room. This conversation was becoming a bit more personal than he cared to witness.
Regulus waited until they were out of the room before stepping closer to you.
“I’m sorry that I hurt you. You didn’t deserve to suffer because I didn’t want to upset my parents. If I could go back and do things differently...it would have been you that I married...not her. I love you. I never loved her as I love you. Why the hell do you think that she left me? Ambrosia is a lot of things. Stupid isn’t one of them.”
You raised an eyebrow.
“She knows that you love me...me specifically and not some other girl?”
Regulus nodded. He didn’t let his eyes leave yours.
“Yes. I told her.”
When you started laughing, Regulus felt a bit confused. What was funny about this whole situation? There was nothing funny! Regulus missed the birth of his daughter and broke your heart for no reason yet here you were laughing.
“What’s funny about this?”
He snapped. You had to swallow back another fit of giggles as you turned to see Remus and Sirius watching you looking as baffled as Regulus. Sirius leaned over to Remus and muttered “when a woman starts laughing at you over something stupid that you did that is how you know how fucked you are.” You made a mental note to congratulate him on that comment later before turning back to Regulus.
“What’s funny is all of this bullshit could have been avoided if you would have been a man and stood up to your parents. We wouldn’t have had to go through anything that we would have. Ambrosia wouldn’t be out there wondering what the fuck she did wrong. I must really be crazy because I am sticking up for her ass. By the way, you married a woman named after some kind of fruit salad. At least my name makes sense.”
Regulus crossed his arms over his chest with a scowl.
“Are you done?”
You shook your head. Hell no, you had enough material to make the poor guy listen to for hours. Regulus wasn’t with you when you were going through your own personal hell. He wasn’t there when you had to put your brother and best friend in the ground. When you lost custody of your nephew to a couple of muggle shitheads or when you were in labor for 20+ hours with Regulus’ child. That was Sirius and Remus there. They went through that whole ordeal with you! It was Sirius who did what Regulus was supposed to do when a child was born. Sirius and Remus were the ones walking the floors comforting a colicky Renee at three am when you were so frazzled that you wanted to cry yourself. The keywords here were Sirius and Remus, not Regulus.
“I have a lot of material. You should stick around.”
You replied with a smirk before sitting down on the couch. Regulus was silent for a few moments as he tried to get himself in check. Finally, he couldn’t stand it or remain calm any longer. Expressing his emotions was hard enough but at the moment he wasn’t feeling too shy either.
“Merlin, I fucked up! Fucked up big! What else can I say, Y/n?! I want to be a part of yours and Renee’s life. What about our child? I deserve to be in her life too...if I would have known before I would have been there. As you said, there are telephones and letters. I didn’t get anything that I deserved to get.”
The guilt began to fill your senses again.
“You made it clear that you wanted nothing to do with me. You had your wife and that is where your heart was.”
“I just told you that I didn’t love her. That would have been all the more of a reason for me to walk away.”
Your eyes dropped to his feet.
“You still wouldn’t have left.”
Regulus waited a moment before closing the distance between you. His fingers tilted your face to his.
“I’m here now.”
You stared into his eyes...those beautiful grey-blue eyes that you loved so much.
“Please, love. I’m not going anywhere ever again. You want the lover that you were supposed to have..the father that our daughter should have had from the beginning...I’m right here.”
You put your hand on top of his. Feeling his skin against yours felt more heavenly than you wanted to admit. Regulus’ hand was trembling beneath yours as you pulled away.
“I can’t trust you yet.”
“I’m not a death eater anymore. If that’s what you're scared of too…”
You didn’t turn to face him again.
“I’m not afraid of you being a death eater. I’ve dealt with that since we were 16. I’m afraid of having my heart broken again. That is what I am afraid of.”
You walked out of the room. At the moment, you needed to get some air and fast!
Sirius waited until he heard the front door close before leaning down and scooping Renee up. He smiled down at his little niece.
“Time for you to shine, sweetheart.”
Regulus was still staring at the place where you had been standing when Sirius walked back into the sitting room. The younger brother’s eyes weren’t blinking as he fought the urge to cry. He thought for a brief moment that you would let him kiss you. If he could give you just one kiss...just show you the passion that he still felt...maybe things would be alright? Now he didn’t know where he stood or if you would ever let him back into your life again. As you said, he was just a page torn from the story that you were living.
“You’ll have to give her some time. The last little bit hasn’t been too kind to any of us. We are all afraid to open up to anyone right now.”
Regulus’ head snapped up at his brother’s voice. He froze seeing the little girl in Sirius’ arms. Regulus would have recognized this baby as his from anywhere. She was everything that Regulus could have ever dreamed about.
Sirius smiled down at her.
“She has your eyes and Y/n’s sweet personality...most of the time. You both have dark hair so take that how you want it. Renee, want to say hi to your daddy?”
The little girl looked between her uncle and father before shoving her face in Sirius’ neck. Sirius’ smile faded when Regulus looked down. It didn’t take Sirius being Regulus’ brother to know that the other man was questioning every choice that he had ever made in his life.
“She’s a bit shy at first. Once she warms up to you, you aren’t going to have another quiet moment in your life. She’s finally starting to talk and we are still working on the walking thing. She doesn’t have much desire to learn when someone is always willing to pick her up.”
Renee had slowly turned her attention back to Regulus with a little sly smile.
“See what I mean?”
Sirius said with a smile. He turned his attention to the little stuffed lamb that was laying on the couch.
“Get that toy and bend down.”
Regulus quickly did as he was told as Sirius stepped within arm's length of his brother and knelt down. Sirius gently turned Renee around.
“Sugar, why don’t you go tell your daddy hi and get your little toy?”
Renee focused her attention on Regulus as he held a hand out. She watched him for a few moments before wrapping her hand around his fingers and taking a few shaky steps. Sirius smiled as she made contact with Regulus’ chest. Regulus gently adjusted the baby in his arms before slipping the stuffed lamb into her hands.
“Daddy.”
Renee said with a smile. Regulus leaned down and snuggled his face against her head. Dark curls tickled his nose as the scent of your perfume mixed with baby lotion filled his senses. This was the scent that Regulus didn’t want to forget as long as he lived.
Sirius, meanwhile, sat down with a smile on his face.
“Regulus, I normally wouldn’t say this in front of the baby but if you plan on lea…”
“I’m not leaving.”
Regulus replied, firmly.
“I can’t...not now. I need to talk to Y/n.”
Sirius smiled, sadly. After the last conversation that the two of you shared, it would probably be a good idea for Regulus to wait for you to go to him. Sirius had politely put the sitting room back in order and really didn’t want to risk it being destroyed again. It would only take one good hex or heavy object to really bruise Regulus up.
“Give her some time, Reg. She needs it.”
Regulus nodded before looking back down to his daughter. Her attention was still glued to the stuffed animal that she was now chewing on. He stroked his finger over Renee's cheek with a soft smile. If he had to wait for you it would be worth it. Patience wasn’t something that Regulus didn’t have much of but maybe it was time to develop a new skill.
_____
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ourloveisforthelovely · 4 years ago
Text
This or That Part 5
Harry Potter AU Marauders ERA
Link to Part 4
Pairings: Regulus Black x Reader. Sirius Black x Reader 
Rating: T
______
2 months…
It had been two months since you had officially begun dating Regulus. As you expected, there was a lot of talking when word of your relationship officially got out. A few stupid boys from your own house decided to make teasing comments about you dating a Slytherin and ended up getting hexed by Regulus. No one was about to mess with Regulus and his reputation.
The only complaint was the lack of physical intimacy in your relationship. When Regulus said that he was taking things slow, he wasn’t kidding. You wondered if Regulus thought you were a slut because you had been hinting about the next level of your relationship for some time.
What if he thinks I’m a whore? Am I whore for wanting to be with him?
The thoughts plagued you almost non-stop! Regulus had been trying to prove to you that he could change but not everything was perfect.
“Christmas is coming up.”
Lily said casually one morning over breakfast. You looked up from the book that Regulus had put down in front of you. Lily’s comment didn’t seem to register with your boyfriend. You knew that Regulus still wasn’t 100% on Lily. He had finally stopped trying to call her a mudblood (after a lot of nasty arguments between the two of you) and was now calling her by her name.
“Yeah, it is. What are your plans?”
You asked. Lily took a sip of her juice giving you a wink. She was partially trying to help get information out of Regulus. You had been hoping that he would take up your offer of going home with you for the holiday. Your parents were over the moon happy with the fact that you finally got a boyfriend. Regulus, on the other hand, wasn’t so sure about the idea of meeting parents so fast was a good idea.
“I’m going home. Maybe we can all get together and do something before we come back to school. What are your plans, Y/n?”
Your eyes flickered to Regulus’ hopefully. His grey eyes didn’t move from the book.
“I’m going home too. James had mentioned that his parents were having a party.”
James nodded as he and Sirius sat down. You noted how Sirius and Regulus still acted as though the other didn’t exist. It didn’t matter how much you begged either boy to give the other brother a chance either.
“Yep, it's going to be lit...well as it can be with one’s parents hovering.”
“We can still have a good time. Y/n, are you coming?”
Sirius asked, with a smirk. If he could just get you alone without your little shadow maybe he could win you over? He still didn’t understand what you saw in Regulus. The two of you seemed like such an awkward couple. Regulus wouldn’t kiss you in public. He acted as if you holding his hand was going to kill him. All that Regulus seemed to be comfortable with was to pull you into a broom closet whenever the mood suited him. Sirius had quit looking at the map when you were on a date with Regulus. All that Sirius saw was your names in broom closets or on top of the astronomy tower for long periods of time.
Some romance.
Sirius thought bitterly as you turned in his direction.
“Remus and I will be there.”
That got Regulus’ attention. His eyes were on you. On your last date, you had mentioned the party but you only were thinking about going. Now that you were going and Sirius was going...Regulus was concerned. He didn’t like the fact that you were still friendly with Sirius. Regulus was jealous and he didn't know why. Maybe it was the worry that he would end up losing you to Sirius in the end.
Why wouldn’t she want Sirius? He isn’t uncomfortable with kissing her in public or touching her for that matter…
Regulus thought gloomily before sliding his hand on top of yours. You scooted closer to him practically begging him for any kind of physical affection that he would give. Regulus still wasn’t for sure how to tell you that he wasn’t completely comfortable with snogging you in front of other people. Should that be saved for private?
James had picked up on the mood between Regulus and Sirius right away.
“Regulus, I know that you don’t have much to say about anything but if you can get away from your crazy parents you can come with Y/n.”
“Thanks but I have plans.”
Regulus replied. You quickly turned to him.
“What plans? I thought that we were going to do something.”
Regulus didn’t turn in your direction.
“Something came up.”
“When were you going to tell me?”
You asked, ignoring your friends who were now focused on the brewing spat between the two of you.
“Later.”
Regulus replied, finally meeting your gaze. He knew that you were put out.
“I have to get going anyway. I need to see Professor Slughorn about an essay.”
You said as you gently let go of Regulus’ hand.
“I’ll come with you.”
He said, calmly.
As soon as the two of you were out of the great hall, Regulus stopped walking and tugged you into an empty classroom.
“What was that back there?”
“Nothing.”
You said. Regulus put his books down before tilting your face to his. Even though you were a tad annoyed with him, Regulus could still win you over with one little smile.
“I’m going to miss you too.”
Regulus leaned down and snuggled his face into your hair. He had to get in control of the situation...fast! Over the past few months, Regulus was trying to be less of a control freak and more spontaneous. This was proving to be difficult for him.
“We better go. We’ll be late.”
You said with a sigh. Why you were so moody was a mixture of things. You had been hoping to have someone on one time with Regulus that you couldn’t have at school. You were tired of hiding in a dark abandoned classroom to get any kind of physical contact with your boyfriend. Sure, these make-out sessions were heated and often left you panting but you wanted more. You loved the way Regulus’ hands were beginning to get braver with each day but he wasn’t being as brave as you wanted.
Maybe he was just trying to be a gentleman and not push you into something that you weren't ready for? You were trying to give him some credit there. Regulus would probably be a perfectionist when it came to your first time. There was also the knowledge of his own disastrous “first time” with his ex Ambrosia Parkinson that was making him take things slow with you?
Ambrosia was another delicate subject that Regulus didn’t discuss often. His ex was a bratty nightmare on two legs. In your mind, she used Regulus. She used him to say that she was dating a member of the Black family then discarded him when she didn’t get way on everything. Regulus, no matter who the woman was, was not going to be easily walked over. You thanked his “control freak” nature for that one.
Ambrosia hated you too. She and Evan Rosier were on the same page that Regulus was wasting his time on you. Whenever either Ambrosia or Evan saw the two of you together they would automatically try to pull Regulus away.
Your own dislike of Evan Rosier came flooding in. You were already thinking negative things of parts of Regulus’ life before you so why not let Evan join in. Regulus knew that you didn't’ like Evan but he wasn’t about to drop his best friend since childhood (and you didn’t expect him to) but he could tell Evan to shut his gigantic trap from time to time.
Regulus kissing your forehead pulled you from your thoughts.
“You look so unhappy.”
You shook your head.
“Can we just drop it and go to potions?”
Regulus sighed and held out his arm.
“Fine.”
As usual, once in Slughorn’s room, Regulus went off to join Evan and his other friends. Snape gave you a nod when the two of you locked gazes. He and, sometimes, Barty was okay. You could deal with Snape better because of his friendship with Lily. That was probably the only reason that he found you so acceptable when it came to Regulus.
“You look all hot and bothered.”
Lily said with a smile. She had come into help with that particular day’s lesson and plopped down beside you.
“I’m just annoyed. Regulus is confusing.”
Lily lightly laughed.
“What boy isn’t? What is he doing?”
You glanced over your shoulder and met Regulus’ gaze. It was as if he knew that you were talking about him.
“Lily, how long did it take for James and yourself to get past second base?”
Lily really laughed on that one.
“That depends if you are asking James or myself. I will say a fair amount of time. James would try to convince you it was years. Have you and Regulus…”
You shook your head.
“No, it isn’t for my lack of not wanting to. I keep telling him that I am ready but he stops when it gets too far. This may be childish but I am wondering if he still cares for...her.”
Lily knew automatically who you were talking about. She glared in Ambrosia’s direction. The girl was still looking at Regulus hopefully.
“I don’t think that you have anything to worry about. If Regulus didn’t care for you I don’t think that he would have stepped outside of his comfort zone the way that he has. Besides, you aren’t named after a fruit salad. What were her parents thinking?”
Lily was relieved when you smiled at that. She understood your moody feelings. You wanted to spend time with Regulus over the holiday break; she didn’t put it past you to have something special already planned. Lily’s heart hurt knowing that those special plans had been crushed by whatever better opportunity came up for Regulus.
“Thanks, Lily.”
You said with a smile as Slughorn stepped in to begin his lesson.
After the lesson was over Slughorn gave out his reminder for his “Slug club” members that his Christmas party was the next evening. Regulus has asked you to go with him right after the two of you began dating. This was one thing that you were at least thankful for. Even if Regulus hadn’t asked you, you would have gone. Slughorn was over the moon for you as a student. When he found out that you were dating Regulus, the old man seemed thrilled.
You stood up to go to the door and wait for Regulus. The moment that you turned in his direction, you wished that you hadn’t. Ambrosia had her arms around Regulus’ shoulders and was kissing him like the world was about to end. Your mouth fell open in shock as Regulus pushed her away furiously.
“What are you thinking?”
Regulus snapped before noticing Evan’s silent giggling.
“Turn around, mate.”
Evan said with a smile. He was enjoying the devastated expression on your face. He didn’t want you with Regulus to begin with. Evan hated the fact that his best friend was dating some filthy half-blood from Gryffindor.
Regulus immediately spun around and felt immediately guilty when he saw your face. There was nothing but hurt and sadness written all over you.
“Y/n…”
You shook your head and left the room without another word.
As you ran down the hall, you ran into something hard and fell backward. After smacking your head on the stone floor, you looked up as James popped out from underneath his invisibility cloak.
“Y/n, precious!”
He squealed delighted to see you but stopped the moment he realized that you were crying.
“Hurry, jump in here.”
The moment that you were under the cloak, you were squished between James and Sirius. Sniffing back some more tears, you took in your current situation.
“What are you two doing?”
Sirius grinned.
“Playing a prank on Snivelly. Hey, are you crying?”
“Forget it.
You said, softly. About that time Regulus came running around the corner. He looked as devastated as you felt.
“Y/n? Darling, where are you?”
Regulus looked around pathetically. He didn’t realize that you were standing just a bit from him.
“Reg, can you slow down?”
Evan and Barty rounded the corner breathing heavily. Barty almost looked like he could pass out.
“Did you find her?”
Regulus shook his head.
“It's like she disappeared. I have to find her.”
Evan shook his head.
“She’ll turn up when she wants to chat. Come on, let's go back to the common room. I have some things to go talk to you about our plans for the holiday.”
Regulus waited a moment before turning and following his friends back down the corridor and out of sight.
James and Sirius waited until the coast was clear before pulling the cloak off. Right as they did, Remus turned the corner and stopped at the sight of you pressed against Sirius and James behind you. Remus mentally compared the three of you looking like three gummy bears stuck together on a summer day.
“I normally don’t ask questions but what the hell is going on? Is Regulus and Lily okay with this? I’m not sure that I am…”
James, Sirius, and yourself immediately pulled apart. Sirius and yourself were scowling at Remus while James howled with laughter. This was the funniest damn thing that had happened to him all day.
“Hush, you. It wasn’t what it looked like.”
Sirius snapped as James got a grip on himself.
“Sirius and I were under the cloak about to pull a grand prank when Y/n came running around the corner and into us. She was….”
“Wait, why were you crying?”
“I don’t want to talk about it.”
You replied. Sirius rolled his eyes as things were starting to click.
“Well, I do. What did my brother do?”
You resisted the urge to return the awkward hug that Sirius was giving you.
“I’m not telling you because I don’t want you to do anything stupid about it!”
You quickly turned and left your two confused best friends and older brother scratching their heads. It wasn’t until Lily walked up did they turn away.
“I can tell you what happened.”
______
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ourloveisforthelovely · 4 years ago
Text
Things We Didn’t Tell You 5
Harry Potter AU 
Pairings: Sirius Black x Reader. 
Link to Chapter 4 
Rating: M
______
James looked up when Sirius stormed down the stairs looking ready to burn the world down. He quickly jumped up to go into best-friend mode.
“You look like you could use a drink.”
Sirius rolled his eyes. He could use a lot of drinks! If he wouldn’t die from alcohol poisoning, downing an entire bottle of whiskey didn’t sound half bad.
“You have no idea!”
James reached over and tossed him a shirt.
“Let’s go out. May want to put this on though. Y/n will kill me if you get sick.”
30 minutes later,
James sat watching Sirius down shot after shot of whiskey while chain-smoking. He wasn’t going to ask Sirius what happened with his parents but this behavior wasn’t normal.
“When did you start smoking again?”
Sirius downed another shot.
“Tonight.”
James sighed at Sirius one-worded answers. He had a feeling that he was going to have to pry a lot more.
“I wasn’t going to ask but what happened with your parents? I’m concerned.”
“You should be.”
Sirius said, coldly. He took a breath before looking at James.
“They called Y/n a whore. Get this shit...they said that I could join the family again but I had to abandon Y/n and take Demelza away from her. I can’t leave Y/n and I sure as hell wouldn’t take our baby from her. Demelza and I need her too much.”
James' expression darkened. Has he really heard his best friend correctly? His dislike for the Black family increased more than he thought possible. Looking at Sirius’ depressed expression made James want to go and personally fight Orion and Walburga.
“What did you tell them?”
Sirius put out the cigarette that he was holding. His rage was also hyper focused on Regulus. His coward of a little brother didn't even try to say anything. The little twat just sat silently the whole time like a worthless coward.
“After I sent Y/n outside with the baby I told them they could kiss my ass and some other curse words.”
James was pleased by Sirius’ response. That was Sirius had stood up to his parents yet again.
“Sirius, you did the right thing. I think you know that. Those quack jobs don’t deserve you in their life and you sure as hell don’t need them. As you said, they are like nuclear waste, Demi doesn’t need that.”
Sirius’ eyes rolled back up.
“I don’t want to be like them. I look at Demelza and am petrified that I am going to turn into my father.”
“You’re not! Mate, I have seen you with that baby and you are nothing like your father. Where is this coming from?”
James asked.
“It's always in the back of my mind.”
James was quiet for a moment before perking up.
“Answer me this. Was your father there when you or Regulus was born?”
“No. He had better things to do.”
James nodded, looking thoughtful.
“And how did you handle Demelza’s birth?”
Sirius’ eyes widened. He hadn’t thought about Demelza’s birth in a while.
“It was rough for me. Y/n handled it like the goddess she is. I was scared to death of that baby. For a good two hours anytime she made a peep I almost screamed like a girl. I finally held her for a while...I’ve never loved someone like her.”
James started laughing hard.
“You’re a great dad.”
2 hours later…
Sirius was surprised to see you sitting at the table when he walked back in with James. He frowned at how Lily and yourself looked grim.
“Ladies, what’s going on?”
You were the one that spoke first.
“Marlene’s dead.”
James’ mouth dropped.
“What?”
You stood and closed the distance between Sirius and yourself. The expression on Sirius’ face made your heart hurt.
“Her whole family is dead. We just got word about an hour ago.”
James put a hand over his mouth as you tried to snuggle your face against Sirius’ chest.
“Are you sure?”
Sirius managed to ask. You nodded.
“Dumbledore just told us.”
“Our numbers just keep going down and down.”
Lily replied, weakly. She hadn’t been able to speak for a few moments. The realization that your numbers were rapidly decreasing in great numbers was numbing. James, meanwhile, put down the drink that he had poured.
“Well, that just does it. Sirius, Y/n I think that the two of you need to stay here for a while longer. We can all keep each other safe.”
Sirius' grey eyes rolled up.
“We’re losing enough friends.”
He turned and walked from the room without another word. Sirius couldn’t stand being in the room any longer. He knew that he would feel guilty for leaving you this way but he needed to be alone.
The following month and a half were one of the worst that everyone had in a very long time. Sirius and yourself seemed to be having the worst of anyone. Since Marlene’s death, you watched as Sirius drifted further and further from you. He started going off on more missions leaving Demelza and yourself for longer periods of time. You tried to say it was due to everything that had happened with his parents than Marlene, however, the insecure side of you knew that he was mourning his ex-lover.
When Sirius was home, he wasn’t really “home.” He seemed to always have his eye on getting out the door. It didn’t matter how much you begged him to stay with you the answer was always no. The romance seemed to vanish as quickly as it had begun. Sex wasn’t happening. When it did, Sirius was so quick to get himself off then pull away from you.
“Is he gone again?”
You looked up from the book that you were reading to see Regulus in the doorway. The last time that you had seen him was the night of that ill-fated dinner.
“Yeah. He doesn’t spend much time anymore.”
“He’s being an idiot.”
Regulus said as he joined you on the couch. Your green eyes rolled up to him.
“No, he isn’t. Sirius is going through a lot. Between whatever happened with your charming parents and Marlene dying…”
Regulus rolled his eyes. Why were you so worried about Sirius and Marlene? Regulus knew the answer. You thought that Sirius was still in love with the now-dead witch and Regulus agreed with you. He couldn’t help wondering how many women one man needed.
“Why are you always comparing yourself with Marlene? She’s a crystal and you are a diamond.”
“Reggie…”
Regulus scooted closer.
“You haven’t called me that in years. I miss this...us...being friends.”
When Regulus pulled you into a kiss you didn’t know who to react. You sat awkwardly as Regulus kissed you hungrily. His tongue was on your lips rubbing gently. Regulus moaned into the kiss as he was finally getting what he wanted (for once). He let it slide that you were sitting totally motionless and not moving to kiss him back.
After a few moments, you finally snapped back into reality and was able to push him away. You jumped up and held your hands out.
“Whoa! What are you doing? What are you thinking?!”
Regulus leaned back before standing up with a smirk.
“Just wanted to try something. Bye, love.”
You shivered at how he sounded like Sirius when he said love. He gave you a shit-eating grin before leaving the room without another word.
The nightmare…
You wanted to scream. The nightmare you frequently had was coming true. Sirius was out there putting his life in danger and Regulus was waiting to take his place once Sirius was dead. You, unfortunately, were in the horrible place of watching your life fall apart!
3 days later…
It was 11:00 pm when Sirius arrived home. He held a few red roses in his left hand. Sirius was feeling beyond guilty. He knew that he had been a shit excuse for a husband and father lately. As much as he wanted to tell you everything that was bothering him; he couldn’t. Talking about his feelings had never been a strong point and that wasn’t changing anytime soon.
Sirius knew that his distance had begun to take its toll on you. The night before last when he spoke to you, you sounded distant. Your voice was almost robotic as Sirius tried to question you on how you and the baby were.
In his head, Sirius knew exactly what he wanted to say,
“Y/n, there is nothing wrong with you and me. I am so happy with you. You make me happy. I have this stupid grin on my face whenever I am within 8 feet of you. It's just my parents...they crushed me again. I had hopes that maybe they changed. The cold things they said about you...I can never forgive. As far as Marlene, I’m sad that she died. She didn’t deserve to go like that”
“Are those roses for me?”
Sirius’ head snapped up to see James sitting on the couch holding a sleeping Harry.
“Sure, mate, didn’t know that you liked flowers. I’ve come to woo you off of your feet.”
James grinned, clearly pleased to see that his best friend’s sense of humor seemed to be returning. He was as worried as you were about Sirius.
“Lily might be a touch offended but I won’t mind. Uh just so you know, Y/n is gone.”
Sirius dropped the roses as eyes widened. Had he heard James right? What kind of “gone” was his friend talking about. Had you gone out with Lily or did you leave his ass?
“James...where is she?”
James gently laid Harry down before standing up.
“Y/n and Remus’ mother died. She and Remus left the day before yesterday to go help their father.”
“An..nd Demelza?”
Sirius choked out. He knew the crazy in his mind was going into overdrive and there was no stopping it. What if he had lost the two of you? There was no way that Sirius would be able to go forward without his wife and child.
James’ tone softened.
“With her mother. Sirius, she didn’t leave you. We can go catch up with them tomorrow. I told Y/n that I would let you know. Now go get some rest and tomorrow you can go fix everything.”
_____
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