#also im black and trans im allowed to say those words

[anime-villian-irl]

I fucking hate it when I'm looking for how to celebrate things while in the "broom closet" and they're like "just celebrate don't have shame in your faith just do it" like no nigga I will get fucking disowned , I will get taken to church forcibly. If I "celebrate without shame" there will be nothing good waiting for me. I love my faith and my gods and I want to celebrate but gods know I can't.

So God fucking damnit give me advice on how to celebrate without my mom finding out.

[1eos]

Sorry but I feel crazy for feeling :/ about how now people are going "make noise about this! Spread the word about what is happening! Make it know that this is bad!" About this like where was this energy for black folk 😭 feels so complicated like yes its fucked up but also am i crazy for feeling mad about how people ignore shit when it happens to black people but suddenly when it happens to white people then the whole site shouts about it? 😭 sucks because you can't even complain about it because YOU KNOW you will get people calling you names for it 😭 sorry I feel more complex feelings and sorry I feel more annoyed than anything 😭 I am one of the bad ones if I said "it sucks that everyone is ignoring the racism because this is happening to a white trans person" I would still be in the wrong to them and they'll point at me and call psyop 😭😭😭😭😭

youre not bad and you're not crazy either. cuz in the end of the day nothing's gonna get done if you won't listen to black ppl 🤷🏾‍♀️ as they say you're only as strong as your weakest link if you have someone in your community that is free to be attacked at will you're giving an in for everyone to be attacked. someone already made a post comparing the two situations but its similar to sex workers raising the alarm about how websites were trying to censor them and how it would only get worse if ppl allowed it and ppl really fell for the 'protecting kids' rhetoric and now here we are with that crazy kosa censorship bill. when ppl just straight up ignored that staff has the ability to moderate and go scorched earth but only want to do it against ppl they don't like and those ppl seemingly being anyone black :) that SHOULDVE been when non blacks woke tf up and started pushing back bc if u allow it to happen to one group of ppl its def gonna keep happening

and you, and anyone else who feels some time of way abt this, aren't in the wrong for feeling that way! its actually annoying as hell 😭😭😭 its like someone handing you the answers to a test but you still fucking fail bc you don't respect the ppl who gave it to you. and we all obvs feel bad for the ppl getting deleted and when it comes to the ppl actually being deleted they really aren't the problem. its the ppl on tumblr who rally around them saying stupid shit like 'this has never been done before' yes it has and im willing to bet YOU were reblogging those posts calling black ppl russian psyops for having an opinion thats beyond blue good red bad! and this lack of respect for people who will always be one of the first to face repercussion is why we can't get shit done bc after tumblr banned black ppl and erased the ferguson and blm tags nonblacks turned around and were encouraging folks to give this bigoted ass website money bc you have to 'support your favorite hellsite' girl what......

[redheadbigshoes]

i honestly can’t stand people who call lesbians “exclusionists” or “gatekeepers” for not wanting to have their label redefined. they don’t even know the meaning or nuance of exclusionism when they talk about it. they think that it’s when you don’t let a person do or say whatever they want no matter the consequences, but that’s not what it means. im saying this as an ace lesbian, i know what it’s like to be targeted by actual exclusionists. saying “the way you are using our language and label is harmful, please consider these alternatives” is not being exclus. wanting to keep a definition intact, saying “words do have meaning”, is not exclus. exclusionism is kicking bi women out of queer spaces for being “half straight”, or saying bi men aren’t allowed in conversations about mlm relationships, or saying aces/aros aren’t “queer enough”, that we can blend in with the straights so we don’t count (even if we’ve suffered aphobic abuse from straight people trying to “fix” us). it’s not someone just saying that your words are harmful. defining lesbianism as a sexuality that doesn’t include men is not exclusionist for the same reason black lesbians asking that white lesbians not call themselves “studs” is not exclusionist. because it has cultural significance, it has meaning that would be erased if white people started using it. that’s not our word to use and “reclaiming” it would be racist.

this is why i don’t trust ppl who identify as “radinclus” because they don’t even know the true definition of exclusionism 99% of the time. im banning “exclus” until they can behave.

- 🍓

Me too. Exclusionist gives the idea that’s something negative, that we’re in the wrong, when we just want people not including men in our identity. That’s literally the only thing we’re here complaining and fighting about.

One thing is to exclude trans people from a whole sexuality (for example), that’s being exclusionist. Wanting people to exclude men from a sexuality that EXCLUDES them is being coherent with the meaning of the word and accepting not everyone is attracted to men. I don’t know why those same people who actively promote the erasure of our identity and the inclusion of men in lesbianism are the same ones who complain about the erasure of multisexual identities and fight about the recognition of attraction to all genders.

I think a lot of this discourse about lesbianism always comes with the fact that the word lesbian was very used to describe only attraction to women, was used as an umbrella term. So people think when we say sapphics that are attracted to men can’t be lesbians we’re invalidating their sexuality and we’re treating as if they were less queer which is not true at all. Sapphic ≠ Lesbian.

Also, you couldn’t have worded it better. Thank you for sending this.

[ex-terf-anti-terf]

what are your views on men

im not joking when i ask this

EDIT: Yes, I wrote this post under the impression that anon specifically means cis men because most of the anons I get are from TERFs, GCs, and rad or rad-adjacent feminists who would never use the word cis. Feel however you want about that.

--

complicated.

I think many (cis) men act in incredibly toxic ways toward each other and toward women, and many of those don’t know or care to change their behavior.

I think most if not all of that is environmental — as in they’ve been conditioned all their lives to understand that they are the priority of the world around them, and that therefore they can basically do whatever they want. They’ve been enabled, and as such become entitled.

I think that no matter what the cause of your issue, once you’re an adult you have a responsibility to work on self-improvement, so even if most of these men are ONLY raging misogynists because they’ve been taught that they’re allowed to be, they’re still on the hook for choosing not to unlearn that.

I think some men are genuinely great and sweet and compassionate and really do want to listen to women about our experiences.

ultimately, I don’t think that I can put men in a box any more than I could put Black folk or trans folk in a box. there is no one box, other than ‘cis man’, that will accurately apply to every cis man out there. and cis man is just a descriptor; it has no judgment associated with it.

(also no I’m not saying #notallmen because the men who say that are almost exclusively misogynists who want to look like allies without having to do any of the work)

[reallyverynormal]

hey im a proshipper, but i have a friend who isnt either proship or anti. she wants to know more about the anti side of things, if you dont mind could you tell me why you are anti ship? and why you believe others should be? i wanna let her make this decision on her own, but idk how anti shippers think and i cant find informational posts on it

this ended up getting kind of long so i’m just going to put it under a readmore but basically anti shippers are people who say this: don’t fetishize minorities, abuse and abuse survivors and also don’t write paedophilic porn and act like that’s a normal thing for cishet women to get off to.

-don’t fetishize abuse and act like it’s hot or cute. by that i mean don’t take a character that is canonically abusive to another character and write some romanticized tortured love story about it, or act like victims have to or can forgive their abusers for abusing them (not saying they can’t, but perpetuating the idea that they can/have to is bad, actually). just fucking don’t -don’t fetishize paedophilia and act like it’s hot or cute. by that i mean don’t write porn of children, don’t write porn of ‘aged up’ children, don’t write porn of adults raping/being in sexual contact with children and act like it’s hot or cute or something normal to get off to -don’t dehumanize gay men, lesbians, trans people--basically the entire LGBT community--by fetishizing them, calling porn of us “sin”, only writing smut fics about us and nothing else, trying to constantly find ways to ship two men in every piece of media, hate literally any female character that could potentially be a love interest just because she gets in the way of your ship. don’t fucking fetishize us, actually! -don’t act like rape/sexual abuse/sexual assault is hot. period. -also don’t write porn about real life fuckin people without their permission, especially, in the cases of people like dan and phil, when they are very clearly deeply uncomfortable with it and the abuse/harassment they have received from this, (tomska and tord from the eddsworld team and 1direction as a whole are also good examples of this shit affecting real life people).

and by these things, i don’t mean that you can’t write about these subjects ever or portray characters involving some of these subjects ever, i’m saying don’t fetishize them. don’t act like fiction doesn’t affect reality, because it does, (look up the jaws affect, as a huge example), and don’t act like you are above the law, because even the law (in the US and canada, at least), can and will punish you for drawing and writing porn about children. 

fetishizing minorities is, you guessed it, dehumanizing and wrong! black people, asian people and the LGBT community especially get this kind of treatment, and if you go around agreeing with the black and asian people who are talking about the fetishization of their races by white people, and you don’t agree with actual LGBT people talking about the fetishization of their gender/sexuality, you’re a fucking hypocrite*. fetishizing any fucking minority is bad, even in fiction.

note that there is also a difference between LGBT people going out of their way to ship two characters together in a queer/gay/etc ship and a cishet girl going out of their way to constantly ship two men together in every piece of media no matter what, especially if those two characters are white/light-skinned, skinny, conventionally attractive cis men. in the case of LGBT people, we’re doing it to create the representation we don’t get in media. for a cishet girl to go out of their way to ship two men in every fandom they join is just fetishization and it’s dehumanizing because we are not your fetish, we are not here to entertain you, we have lives to live outside of entertaining you and getting you off and often times we have spent years trying to get out of circles where people only see us as sex objects. fuck off. 

fetishizing people’s abuse and turning something horrific into something you can get off to is also extremely shitty and spits in the faces of actual abuse survivors because you’re acting like it’s cute, hot, something to get off to when we’ve often spent years trying to forget what’s happened to us. when we’re still going through this every fuckin day. when people have killed themselves because of the abuse that we’ve gone through. when you do this, you act like what we went through is just something for you to get off to when it is often so bad we are left permanently scarred, our consciousnesses permanently broken, struggling with life-long mental health issues directly caused by the abuse we went through. that is not your fucking fetish.

again--i’m not saying you can’t write about these subjects, i’m saying don’t fetishize them, i.e. don’t act like any of these things can be a good thing, don’t write them like they’re something to get off to, don’t write them like they’re something to strive for or can be in any way, shape or form healthy. write them as they are: horrific, scarring, mentally and physically draining, terrifying, and nightmare-inducing. do not portray these things in a positive light is all we are fucking asking.

inb4 “so we’re not allowed to write characters who think their abuse is good???” or some bullshit like that, no, that’s not what i’m saying. you can write a character who has an extremely complicated relationship with their abuse, for example being sexually abused from childhood and “liking” it because that’s how they were trained to respond to sexual situations, that’s how they were introduced to sex and their body responds to sexually violent situations by being aroused, even if the person doesn’t want to be because biology =/= consent, and that’s how sexual trauma works, albeit not for everyone, but for some people like me. you can write about a character that struggles with “liking” their trauma because sexual violence and being a victim of it is what feels safe, “normal” and familiar to them, while healthy sex is foreign and terrifying because they don’t know how to behave in a healthy sexual environment. that is a normal thing to write about and should, in fact, be written about more because i don’t see anything like that being written by anyone anywhere, and is, in my opinion, FAR more interesting than forcefully writing a character to be in love with their abuser and entirely romanticizing their abusive relationship, (that isn’t to say that you can’t write a character that’s in love with their abuser and wants to forgive them/make it work/ignores the abuse/doesn’t know it’s abuse/etc, just stop acting like their relationship is in any way healthy or something to strive for or cute/hot/etc, just don’t fucking romanticize the abuse they’re going through, portray it as a bad thing because that’s what it is--a bad thing).

that’s the anti-shipper argument: don’t fetishize people, don’t fetishize (sexual) abuse, don’t fetishize (sexual) abuse survivors, and don’t fetishize paedophilia.

it’s pretty simple once you break it down, but i hope my relatively detailed explanation shows you why you’re an asshole, and i desperately hope your friend doesn’t turn out to be like you in this regard :)

*i’m a white person, so if any POC finds this statement racist or offensive or knows of a better way to word it, feel free to let me know and i’ll delete it/change it/etc

[confessinbouthanson]

“ an open letter to everyone about zac

i just found out about this a few days ago, i have looked at the twitter account that posted screenshots, i have been to the reddit. and i feel like i must still be missing something? nowhere did i see anything like  f**k n******s /jews/trans people ect. i saw a lot of republican support and gun humor…that were posted on his PRIVATE ACCOUNTS .         there WILL be people in this world who do out and do and say things that offend YOU. be an adult and move on. dont stalk, shame, harass or start an online rampage on 3 websites causing the person involved to turn off comments and his wife to straight up leave. who do YOU people think you are? you think you have the right to do that because youve been a ‘fan’ since '97 so your entitled to bash him?   because hes a celebrity? hes  still human he has the right to privacy and makes mistakes.if your so offended they didnt post blm or anything like that guess what alot of other celebrities and bands didnt eaither. some people dont want to post anything about it because its very controversial and last i checked hanson is not about contravercy. zac stated the bitter truth him posting blm will not stop it from happening again, just like celebrities donating money wont stop it. the way this generation of kids are raised will and so will changing laws .thats it.          he didnt makes those memes he reposted them. they have been on the internet forever alot of other people reposted them too. again most of what i saw was gun humor and republican support ect.  not for everyone. some people are die hard republicans and will vote for the candidate   JUST because they want their party to win, does not matter who it is or what they stand for. you cant just say oh hes a trump supporter so hes racist. you sound so ignorant. people want to twist things and make things much bigger than they are.if i missed a post saying n******rs and je*s /tans gays ect suck and need to die or anything along those lines please share id love to see. and all of you saying how can kate put up with him ect and how their first few years were shaky, post proof of that too.  how the hell would you know what goes on behind closed doors?do you live with them?  even if they did have a rough start, every relationship has growing pains esp when you are young.    everyone who is a 'fanson’ should already know   blues, jazz motown-mostly black artists were huge influence on hanson. they have worked with many black aritsts.  just like anyone who is a 'fanson’ should know they  are DEVOUT greek  orthodox christians. ie: very very oldschool stream of Christianity that follows the OLD testiment, basic Christianity follows the new testimate ie: living through the example of jesus , jesus loves everyone gay straight black white ect  look into it, the believes ect. its their right to live that way if thats what they choose to do, alot of religions do look down on gays trans ect and truely belive you will go to hell for it    because the way  the testimate is written and translated. very duggar esq. some strains of that dont even allow the women to wear pants  and you can only eat certain foods on certain days ect.  again if thats his beliefs thats his beliefs.not everyone supports those lifestyles just because the internet popularized them. hell mainstream tv was sill making stereotype jokes about gays up until like 6 years ago. i saw no uproar online about celebrities that follow kabballah (the red bracelets) no half of you dont even know what that REALLY is,  no you just wear the bracelet because its trendy and your fav celeb  wears it.  im  not even gonna sit here and be all like 'well he is from oklahoma and alot of people are biggots there'  because guess what? its like that everywhere. ive lived all over the country and it is like that in small towns and large citys. north south east west. and kate posting things on her ig about not supporting planned parenthood,  well although they do offer many medical services they also preform abortions.  again religious  and republican people have a very big issue with that. and shes from ga so maybe she had family that were confederate soldiers which is why she said save the flag.                               im not saying this is right or not disgusting, im saying there are all kinds of people in the world and you CAN NOT hate, harass, bully ect someone because they dont believe the same stuff you do. it does not matter they are a celebrity   dont even go there with them having a 'responsibility’ the ONLY thing they are responsible for is what made them famous-making music. you guys went out of your way to stalk him and invade his privacy, you had a certain image of him in your minds and put him on a pedestal and when he proved it to be wrong, now your pissed off. you all need to grow the fuck up. what are you gonna go through life bashing everyone that does not  drop their beliefs for whats socially popular? posting memes does not mean hes a straight up ass in person to people that are black, gay, trans, fat ect. actions speak louder than words. i dont care for the movie american hisotry x  because most of it is very racist and violent, but the MESSAGE of the movie  shows that a person can be involved in a group, live a certain way, believe certain things to the point where the inflict DEATH on someone and tattoo their entire body with racist tattoos,  but then change  their lives and be remorseful once they break free. its like a drug addict. if you hang around the same group of people, do not change your contact info, no matter how hard your desperately want to get sober, you wont. because you need to change your lifestyle . it is absolutely no secret that walker and diana dictate all those kids lives, everything about them, including who they married. the guys and the girls. walker worked with natalies  family member, not directly but they were contacts, they met  they had similar  beliefes, and had $$$$$  kates family also has $$$$$$  so does everyone elce that married into that family . unless your rich and have similar lifestyle you never had a chance girls. youd have to be preapproved by mom and dad. dont you think its odd zac never had a girlfriend that was  the friend of one of his brothers? marrion , kate and another girl who im not even gonna mention because honestly none of you know who she is anyway lol.

it takes all kinds of people in this world. if you like their music you like their music. half the celebrities musicians youlook up to and admire have EXTREMELY different lives behind closed doors and because you dont know about it its fine.  what they do at the end of the day  in private is up to them . just like what you do is up to you are you people prefect? i doubt it.”

[tumblunni]

MORE UPDATES ON THINGS WHAT HAPPEN

The half week milestone of the hospital house thingie time! I think the term they use for it is "a residential stay"? Cos like its not a hospital its a shared housing block thats just full of doctors. I get to sleep in a real bed and there's a nice community room and board game nights and stuff. But its still really scary how intense the supervision can be! Like they have a window to look into your room once per hour every hour constantly. And they have to go through your undies and catalog them as part of the possessions check. I was not warned about that and it was mega embarassing trying to explain a binder to a bunch of old lady doctors! Oh and i had yo do a urine test today which was possibly the most fuckin embarassing thing in the actual universe. And you're not even allowed to take your own pills! They keep them locked in a big ominous wall of lockers and you have to come into the office and swallow the pill while theyre watching. I guess maybe because some people might be faking their illness and selling their pills on the black market or whatever? But that literally doesnt happen with antidepressants, they have no 'high' or even any effect at all on non-sick people. So it just makes no sense to me and its real embarassing cos like i said i suck at taking pills with plain water and without a straw. The ones i take are real damn chunky things the size of my thumbnail! I think i'l get better at not (literally) choking under pressure over time, tho. Hopefully.

Anyway that's all the bad out of the way! Now the good and the neutral and the just miscellaneous!

Its still nervewracking having to shower in a shared house but they have a cool walk-in shower and ive never tried one of those so it was vaguely interesting. And im allowed to take my showers early at 6am to minimize the chance of anyone else trying to use the door, lol. My biggest fear is having some staff member walk in on me when im naked like back in that homeless hostel. Oh or that time in the homeless hostel where the teenage boys filled the entire bathroom with inflated condoms wall to wall. Like wow so much damn effort to prank the stupid nervous bunni who probably would have been embarassed by literally anything else. Man this place is bringing so many memories of that homeless hostel but at least this time its a place specifically for sick people and they know i'm anxious doing shared cooking and board games and whatever so they dont make fun of me for it. But in a lot of ways that hostel had more freedoms too.. *shrug*

Anyway! A good! I get to have cooking lesson!! I know literally nothing about cooking and now i get to know several thing!! This nice doctor called Josie taught me how to make an omelette and i tasted ham for the first time! That is just how limited my life experiences are, lol. Oh and they want me to say that she's a 'mental health worker' not a doctor, but its all real confusing?? Like they have the staff that look after you and then the only ones we're supposed to call doctors are the ones who actually have the authority to prescribe pills and diagnosies. But like if youre in a hospital you'd call them all doctors, not just the actual surgeon? Or i guess theyre kinda like nursing home staff?? But they cant be support workers cos support workers are specific government assigned inspector type guys like Richard who only meet with you once a week.and i have to remember to not call him a social worker either cos social workers only work with family and custody related stuff. I dunno?? Basically the medical industry has a lot of names that dont really describe what the actual thing is, lol. Anyway the ham omelette was great and now im gonna try and remember so i can try and make it myself next time! HAM ACCOMPLISHED

Also i played bingo with a few other patients and it was fun but funny that i lost 6 times in a row when there were only 3 of us. I got a consolation prize of a pack of neon highlighter pens so hell yeah!!

I'm getting booked in to try some additional classes starting next week on monday and tuesday morning. The computer programming one was sadly unavailable, but i managed tp snag a place in "confidence building group therapy" and "basic how to use power tools". I wasnt really all that interested in that one but i thought it would be a useful skill even if its less fun. And maybe you get to actyally make something to take home at the end? A lil shelf to help organize this awkward lil room better, maybe?

And an unexpected bonus of being semi-hospitalized is that i get a free bus pass! And cos im here cos of my social anxiety theyre gonna help me get outside more and actually use this thing to the fullest! The first thing we did was the trip to actually get the bus pass itself. It was like "bus, take my money to take me to the place where i can never give you money again!" XD Ive been really stupidly nervous about going on tne bus in my old neighbourhood cos MAN it was really isolated there and everything just amplified my mental illness. An almost two hour bus ride to get to ANY SHOPS AT ALL, with only one bus for the whole town so it was always crowded and full of screaming kids and gossipy everyones. Social anxiety: maximum level proud mode!

So yeah i feel BIG ACCONPLISHED! I was able to take this bus for the first time with a doctor coming with me. Power Grandpa The Strong. His actual name is Paul and he has awesome sleeve tattoos of like anchors and dragons and sports teams and stuff! And he likes thrift stores and wearing silly hats too! Its like he's powerful enough to wrestle away everyone's anxieties! I was able to be a bit reckless too and i went out wearing my fave shirt thats like trans pride coloured plaid. A POWERFUL SHIRT IS REQUIRED FOR THIS QUEST! so we went to the office to register this bus pass and i panicked a bit cos apparantky we brought the wrong form and i wrote my name in the wrong box and then my passport photo looked terrible and aaa! But it all worked out and i was kinda freaking out for nothing. And he took me for a lil tour of the place and showed me this cool shop that does spray paint tye dye t shirts with spiderman on them?? Why does this incredibly specific shop exist and how have i never heard of it before?? There was also a new harry potter shop next to the disney shop, and the old used book store i used to visit as a kid was still there, complete with rickety spiral staircase and ominous basement trap door. I'm still not brave enough to go down there, but apparantly its just the history books section so meh. Then we actually went to a fancy coffee shop and i had this brain freeze mango ice frappucchino thing! Im trying all the new foods!!

And i was TOO HIGH ON DECADENCE and made a RECKLESS CHOICE! i blame power gramp's amazing tattoos, they were totally whispering to me that i shoukd screw the rules and ride off into the sunset on a metaphorical harley davidsen of mental health

So i was like Hey Paul I Am Totally Fine Getting Home On My Own, and it was like i was floating off in the distance somewhere begging my body to not speaketh these words. But it ended up working out okay! The excitement of it all and the sense of accomplishmebt from getting there all okay allowed me to mostly not freak out as i spent the day in town and looked at some shops and stuff. Basic Living Skills: Completed! I chilled out in the library (tho i dont have a card yet, alas!) and visited like five comic and anime stores, and got lost but found a Pizza Hut and that was SO NOSTALGIC FOR MY CHILDHOOD and it didnt taste quite as good as i remembered but the waiter guy was super nice and had a similar shirt and it was All Good! Oh and i gave all my money to a homeless person and that's why i'm broke now. And i bought a plastic slug! I just saw it from across the room and was like OH NO I AM BEING MAGNETISED TOWARDS IT OH NO IT HAS ALREADY BEEN BOUGHT. I need to think of a name for this new friend!!

So yeh i got home okay and i felt really acconplished and that was the furthest trip away that i've taken in ages! Man my mental illness makes me feel pathetic, but it also brings ridiculously big joys from the smallest of silly acconplishys!

Oh and thank you so much to the people who sent me emails! It really helped so much to keep me from giving up during the first few days before i made a bit of progress and felt like i could really do this, yknow? Especially big thanks tp the friend who sent me that mysterious super happy song that they found on a mystery disc in a german market?? Im still not sure whether its in greek or hasidic jewish but it sounds AMAZING and i hope someday i can figure out the band so i can hear their other singles!

Ok this is bunni out! BIG HUGS FOR THE EVERYONE AAAA

[over-roaming-waves]

Turn Turn Turn

Rating: SFW

Charaters: Yuma Tsukumo, Yugi Mouto, Atem, Yusei Fudo, Jaden Yuki, Carly Nagisa, Jack Atlas, Yami Bakura, Ryou Bakura, Malik Ishtar, Isis ishtar, Mai Valentine, Jounouchi Katsuya Mentioned: Seto Kaiba, Mokuba Kaiba

Pairings: Puzzleship, Visionship, Theifship (slowburn), Scoopship, More to be added.

                                                  January

“O.K., you can do this Yuma. Just go in there and say you want to join. Right then, it’s not like they’re going to kick you out because you’re just start, or you’re too young, or anything like that. And it’s definitely not likely that they will call my sister and tell her everything. O.K., O.K. …Kattobingu! “

He opened the door.

“Hey there, I’m Tsukumo Yuma and I’m here to-“

“Join the gaming club, but don’t tell your sister because she doesn’t know.”

Yuma look where the answer came from and saw a man with platinum blond hair and skin that was several shades darker than his own. He was reading a guide book for a game called Monster World.

“How did you-“

“Please, you were stand in front of the building for 30 minutes. Most everyone heard some part of your inner monologue when they came in.”

“Malik, please don’t be so rude. It was not long ago that you were in his position,” a woman with the same shade of skin and the distinct air of an older sister around her came in. She bowed, which made her black hair flow over her shoulder, “Welcome, I am Isis Ishtar and this is my younger brother, Malik. If you’d like, I’ll take you to the next room and we’ll see about getting you some more information, as well as creating your character for our role-playing game.”

Yuma was escorted inside, thou he saw Malik mimicking his sister behind her back.

He was brought into a big room, with a table near a kitchen area. The table was occupied a figure hunched over an RPG… thingy that kept them hidden from view, only allowing a view of the person’s arms.  In a chair on the left side farthest from the cover, there was a man with two different shades pf brown in his hair, the top part being lighter than the bottom part. He seems occupied by his phone. On the brunet’s opposing side, he spotted two blonds, a man and a woman, with a chair between them. On the man’s left, there was a black-haired woman. She and the man were holding hands.

Deep breath and…

“Hello, I’m Tsukumo Yuma and I wish to join your Game Club. I am going into my third year of middle school and want to be more honest with who I am. Please take care of me!”

He bowed so far down, he felt like one of those wooden birds that go up and down, mimicking a drinking bird. He doesn’t hear anything from the other members but he could feel their stare as they look at him and his outfit that he bought behind his sister’s back. He’s sure that grandma knows already but…he’s scared that Akari would hate him if he told her. He’s still starting out and… this was really the first place that he went to as a man. That poster on the pole felt like a sign that he should be himself. That there were people would accept him as Yuma.

He felt like maybe this was a mistake. Maybe he’s too young. Maybe he needs to do more to be able to join. Maybe-

He smells a chocolatey scent. Someone was walking, put something down (cups maybe?), and walking again. He felt someone guide him up, where he saw bright blue eyes stare down at him.

“It’s O.K., you’re doing fine.”

The blue-eyed masterpiece escorted him to an empty chair, where he gave Yuma a hot chocolate. (Was that what he put on the table?)  he then started talking again in his velvety voice.

“We’d be glad to have you as a member. Isis is just getting some paper work for you to make it all official. Unfortunately, several members including the founder are not here at the moment but you can be introduced to the members that are here. I am Fudo Yusei, and I am like you in body.”

“wow, that pretty good up until that last part. Hey there, I’m Jaden Yuki. Oh, right, I meant Yuki Jaden. Well, what I mean is my personal name is Jaden. I was born and raised in the USA, so I’ll warn ya right now that I will mess up on social niceties. And like Yusei so weirdly said it, I’m a Trans Man. I’ll get your character sheet, ‘kay?” shouted the two-toned brunet, who had put his phone down to look at him with his soft brown eyes. He left his chair to get the sheet.

“Right”, the blond woman said, “You can call me Mai Valentine and I was assigned male at birth. As you can see, I disagreed with that decision. The idiot next to me is Jake Atlas, who is Cis and is dating the only other Trans woman in the place, Carly. The silent Dungeon Master who is rudely ignoring our guest is Bakura. (he heard a grunt by the covered man) You probably have already met Isis and Malik, so that would be a bit redundant and the others can introduce themselves when they come in.”

Then Mai started to explain the rules of the game, how to set up his character, how to roll for the stats, and other such thing while he was filling out the papers Isis gave him … until he heard Jaden yell.

”HOLY SHIT! GUYS, ATEM IS PREGNANT!!”

____________________

“So, you’re preggers, hon?”

“… I wanted to tell you AFTER I told our close family and friends. I already expressed my displeasure in my IDIOTIC, BUBBLE-HEADED, TRATOROUS SISTER telling everyone with an internet connection my current status about something I told her in private!”

“While I’m sure got that by how quickly the post got deleted. I’ll put the congratulatory gifts given to you away for a better time. Call me Curious George but when would you have told your more… distant relatives?”

“ …. When everyone else would know. By the way, how would you think the members of our gaming club would feel about being part of a ceremony that my family is putting together?”

“Pay for the outfits and you’ve got ‘em, Sweetheart.”

____________________

The Kame Game Shop was always slow at 2 in the afternoon. Jaden liked it that was. It gave him time to work on his secret job. Only three people on the planet know that Haou, the author of the hit series Gates of Eterniea, was a trans man living in Japan. He loved taking people to new world with amazing adventures.  He also liked his privacy. Honestly, Jaden probably needed his job at Kame more for his mental heath more then anything.

It keeps him from going into that place he can’t go. where bad things lurk. Wher-

*DING*

“Yug’ why didn’t ya tell me sooner”, shouted the blond that just came in. The blond was none other than Yugi’s best friend from high school, Katsuya Jonouchi, who goes by Jou.

“About…”

“da baby!”

“Well, that’s why I called you. And sent an email. And texted you.”

“… Ya know da Kaiba takes things when we’re testin’, buddy.”

“Really? Well, maybe Seto-kun should revise his policies then. I’ll talk about it with Mokuba when he comes to the next meeting.”

“… Sorry, I fucked up, Yug’”

“By the way, do you have a suit?”

“…why ’da ask about ‘dat?”

“Well, Mama, Ji-chan, and Atem’s parents want to have a wedding.”

“But ya already married ta ‘im!”

“Yeah, but they probably wanted to have a ‘proper’ ceremony. Plus, it could be a fun anniversary gift.”

“Tch, Rich Folks.”

“By the way, can you please tell Anzu, Hiroto, and the others about the Ceremony?”

Jou leaves, no doubt to tell Yugi’s other friends about the party that’s going to happen.

“Jaden?”

“Yeah, boss?”

“Let us tell the others about the ceremony, O.K.?”

“’Kay.”

Now then, how do the Band of the Pejuleum get through the Cave of Despair….

____________________

At the second ever time that he came into the Domino City Gaming Club, he saw two people with spikey black hair that had a rim of red at the edges. Thou they had the same hair, they had vastly different styles, one in head to toe black clothes with a tattoo on his right arm, the other in a grey business suit. He was too far away to hear the words so he jogged over to the two.

“Hi there, I’m Tsukumo Yuma.  I’m a new member of the Domino City Gaming Club. I hope we can be good friends,” Yuma exclaimed as he bowed to his seniors of the club.

The two turned and… whoa, they both looked so weird. The tattooed one had blond bangs that frames his purple eyes, who looked at him kindly. The other, who somehow had darker skin than Yuma’s own, looked so excited at him(?) with his red (?!?) eyes. The red-eye guy, who had blond streaks in his hair to go with his blond bangs, went into a speech that he said with such enthusiasm that it felt like he was trying to sell him on an epic game that he just played that he wanted to share with everyone.

“Welcome once again to the Domino City Gaming Club! I am the founder and fanatical backer of the club, Atem La Lune. The handsome man next to me in my Husband, Yugi. I’m sure you’ve met the secretary of the DCGC, a little nickname I gave our illustrious club, Isis Ishtar, as well as one of our greeters. The brunet giant setting up the duel disks is Seto Kaiba, and the child with the wild black mane is Mokuba. Mokuba is genderfluid, and they indicate what gender they are by wearing a bow in their hair if they wish to be referred to as female, and leaving their hair down if they want to be man at that time. If I’ve read the notes from last time correctly, you were already introduced to Mai, Jaden, Yusei, Jack, Carly, Malik, and Bakura. I apologize for anything that the latter two would have done t-“

“Oy, don’t try that shit with me, you short-ass brat. You were telling your blond Bunny that you got knocked up last time. The least you could due is not act like some fucking saint.”

Yuma saw the white-haired Bakura (he saw him fully when he knocked out the cardboard-thingy after Jaden say that Atem was going to be a papa) charge at Atem. Atem looked ready to fight the white-head when Yugi stopped it in its tracks before proclaimed the weirdest announcement.

“O.k. just want everyone here to know that Atem and I and having a Wedding ceremony, courtesy of the matriarch of the La Lune clan, and all DCGC members are invited and are allowed to bring a guest. This is a formal affair so Atem will pay for any clothes that you would need. I expect to see most of you there.”

“You’re already married,” Shouted Jake.

“Mother insisted on it as an anniversary gift. But if you don’t want to go…”

“Hell yeah I’m going!”

“Woo!”

Yuma stared on as each person there offered their congratulations, their condolences, and their RSVP.

“Things tend to hectic here,” Yuma turned to see another white-haired guy looking on, “But I think that it just gives this group a unique character, don’t you think so?” The snowy haired guy looked at him in fondness. “Bakura Ryou, my brother’s looking for the right personal name, so he’s been going by the familial name for now.”

Yuma smiled, “Yeah, I think it’s good.”

He just knows that this will be a good year.

[multapohja966]

All of them (as requested jdkdk) 👀

ahhah thank you!! <3 <3 (and thank you to the anon who sent the same as well! )

(put it under a read more)

1. describe your idea of a perfect datei haven’t really thought about this… i think it’s something involving coffee, but i think having some alone time with the person is important to me.and.. this might be a hilly billy thing but going to some nature place they/me connect to their youth is cool.

2. whats your “type”strong personality and oppinionated is propably the most important. but you have to have a will to think and to a certain extent see all of your oppinions as up for debate. people who do not care about what others think and express themselves how they want!! and i quess i like masculine girls and feminine boys.

3. do you want kids?hmmm… jeah i have sometimes thought of myself as a parent and liked the thought. but it’s such a huge responsobility that i don’t really know what the reality of it would be.

4. if you do, will you adopt or use some other form of child birth?hmmm well i already know that i won’t be the one giving birth. i see adoption as a really valid option, but jeah im not that far into considering kids.

5. describe the cutest date you’ve ever been oni’ve been on an official date like once and it was absolutely awful. but there’s this other time i hung out with this dude i liked and im like 90% sure he liked me too at the time but we were both socially incapable suckers. but jeah we rode our bikes on a summer evening and he showed me the place he goes to when he wants to be alone, which was this solid rock hill that had a view of the biggest swamp i had ever seen. was really dope

6. describe your experience having sex for the first time (were you nervous? or was it easy peasy?)you come to my virgin jack-off house….

7. are you a morning time gay or night time gay?night time. i’m so bad at funktionin during the day.

8. opinion on nap dates?haven’t really tried but from ecperience i have with friends i think it’s such a good way to create trust

9. opinion on brown eyes?very nice. especially those almost black ones and that hazel color stuff.

10. dog gay or cat gay?dog gay!!

11. would you ever date someone who owned rodents or reptiles?YES!!

12. whats a turn off you look for before you start officially dating someone?not really that experienced with commitment (i love being trans in a small village smh) but propably i just need to know they’re mature enough.

13. what is a misconception you had about lgb people before you realized you were one?hmmm idk i didn’t really have much exposion to them but i guess i kinda had this thought they were super different from the people around me? the typical thing bad representation brings.

14. what is a piece of advice you would give to your younger selfbeing something different isn’t bad. you don’t have to compensate being lgbt+ with aggressively being something “normal” for people to not leave you. be nice and appreachable and mature, but you won’t gain anything from trying to please the people who are more easy to digest/”park of the mass”. it won’t work and it’ll be hard to accept that people see fault in even small things, but when you be yourself and express yourself greatly enough with confdence, THEN people will be drawn to you.

15. (if attracted to more than one gender) do you have different “types” for different genders?jeah…. i really like men who are like sensitive and skinny and like i hate this but like: beta males (ajndfljns). but in women i adore the basic strong muscular and huge woman with a confident and relaxed nature. i haven’t really thought about a specific type when it comes to nb people. because “stylistic/creative” is a bit too broad

16. who is an ex you regret?hmmm i don’t really think i regret any.

17. night club gay or cafe gay?cafe gay. clubbing is okay sometimes with good company and enough alcohol in my system but if im sober-ish and with some people i hate it. (also i have mostly been to straight clubs  and ffff i don’t fit there at all and it gets bad if i start to think about it)

18. who is one person you would “go straight” forbi..

19. video game gay, book gay, or movie gay?all.

20. favourite gay ship (canon or not)uuhhf.. hmmmmm.. bumblebee?

21. favourite gay youtubermiles jai

22. have you ever unknowingly asked out a straight person?prolly not. but it’s a grey line since i did some romantic shit as femme representing when i was in the trans closet.

23. have you ever been in love?yes. it was such a defining feeling for me

24. have you ever been heartbroken?yeah, but i’m kind of embarrassed by it

25. how do you determine if you want to be them or be with someonethis is something it think about a lot as a trans masc person, but i have always thought that despite my taste in men/masc people and my ideal look often being intertwining (those young artsy gopnik -aesthetic boys are the ideal look for me lol) the feelings of “i want to be like that” and “i want to date that” have always been clearly different for me.

26. favourite lgb musician/banddoes tyler the creator count? because he’s propably an artist i relate to and admire the most. ohhhhh lil peep is the same too. also kevin abstract, he means the world.

27. what is a piece of advice you have for young / baby gaysit’s hard to live in a society that doesn’t always give you the same possibilities because of your identity. but try to see it in a healthy light and compromice only on things that don’t hurt your identity and who you are. you’re allowed to be weird and controversial and it doesn’t matter what people think because it’s them who are shallow and small minded. but remember that things you have to do as a person who’s part of a society need to be taken care of for your own health! :D (and queer excellense heh)

28. are you out? if so how did you come outyes. well.. ACTUALLY i never came out about my sexuality??? i never saw it as necessary. i think my parents know tho, i don’t really think about it. huh.. how weird i didn’t even realise. i’m “out” to almost everyone tho cause im super open about it.

my gender was a more complicated issue. i first came out to my closest friends. then to some friends who weren’t really lgbt+ informed (and they were all so supportive!) then to my mom. then to everyone else in instagram. the last and most hard was my dad, who has always supported me in everything, but isn’t really informed about stuff like that and is the typical old school finnish man. he was supportive too! at the moment the only one who doesn’t know is my grandma.

29. what is the most uncomfortable / strange coming out experience you have coming out to my dad lmao. cause he didn’t know what i mean XDD i thought that in light of resent lgbt+ visibility he would have at least heard about nonbinary people but he just didn’t know so i had to explain and jeahh.

30. what is a piece of advice for people who may not be in a safe place to express their sexualityi have pretty safe surrounding so im not completely sure what i can say.. but from my experience i want to say that despite how it always seems and feels, people are empathetic. people truly are understanding. no person wants harm, we’re all just so confused and misinformed. people will understand and change their ways if you give them your honest self because they are just confused. the most beautiful and supportive words ive gotten in regards to my identity are from a cishet boy in a party, who previously had really toxic and mean perception of nb people, but after i came out to him and we talked about the whole thing. he gave me this whole speech about how i should always be myself and not let anyone give me shit. honestly i get a bit teary sometimes when i think about it. but jea, there’s this raw goodness in people that i often forget exists, but it is there.

[alien-bodies]

Oversharing Time!!!

(i just made that title up that’s not the official title I’m just Like That)

Ok so @frogyell​ tagged my main account (I am BLEST) but that’s for Refined Star Trek Content and this one’s for excellent moodboard content and garbage so here’s the garbage!!! I’m putting it under a cut bc it manipulates your brain to want to read through 85 fuckin facts about me more wow I love science

rules: answer these 85 statements about yourself, then tag 20 people.

1. last drink: Water! off to a great start

2. last phone call: my local Hot Topic. I feel like I should also mention I work there. But if you don’t know that and steal my phone you’ll see I have a contact named Hot Topic

3. last text message: Google sent me a verification code, but the last one I sent was to my brother it says “k”

4. last song you listened to: It’s called The Horror Of Your Love by Ludo, if I had to delete all but one song on my 121-song Best Enemies playlist I’d keep this one it’s Peak and kinda has vore but it’s metaphorical. metavoreical, if you will

5. time you cried: during my latest EMDR sesh! I was in Wales and everything it was a Lot I got ice cream after

6. dated someone twice? Big No

7. kissed someone and regretted it? Not really?

8. been cheated on? my ex had 16 anime dating sims downloaded at one point while we were dating does that count

9. lost someone special? yea

10. been depressed? hella

11. gotten drunk and thrown up? I’ve been drunk 1 time and it was when I was playing English handbells at my dad’s church’s wassail night but I did not throw up no

fave colors

12. Black

13. Lavendar

14. Light blue

in the last year have you…

15. made new friends? Hell Yell!!

16. fallen out of love? k i n d a ? ?

17. laughed until you cried? oh absolutely

18. found out someone was talking about you? OH BOY YUP YUP

19. met someone who changed you? yes! she managed to physically alter my hippocampus without touching it how fuckign whack is that

20. found out who your friends are? It’s always the same miraculous group chat

21. kissed someone on your facebook friends list? sure have

general

22. how many of your facebook friends do you know irl? I keep it nice and refined so all of them. My old account is another story

23. do you have any pets? one beautiful and talented cat named Moriarty. A good description is she’s got puppy software on cat hardware.

24. do you want to change your name? listen I’ve been through 4.5 of these fuckers, I like Nate, I’m Quite Finished

25. what did you do for your last birthday? invited 2 pals over, I remember one of them suddenly whipped out I Am The Doctor and the Dr Who theme on the piano out of fuckin nowhere and I was like “Daniel what the hell you’re so talented” and then I hardcore dissociated the rest of the day

26. what time did you wake up today? 10:00

27. what were you doing at midnight last night? chatting w @houseofoakdown​ and also editing my monstrosity of a fanfiction

28. what is something you cant wait for? Going back to school! then I can graduate in my pajamas and eat creamed corn in celebration

30. what are you listening to right now? the same goddamn playlist, this one’s called Battle Cry by The Family Crest, i cri erytiem

31. have you ever talked to a person named tom? probably???

32. something thats getting on your nerves? my brother vaping in the bathroom with the fan on at 12:30am

33. most visited website: tungle dot hell

34. hair color: I started out blonde af now I’m less blonde but still blonde.

35. long or short hair: short

36. do you have a crush on someone: :[] yes

37. what do you like about yourself: i’m hella smart, my moodboards are bangin, my writing is cool af, I’m well-hydrated at all times

38. want any piercings? Big No

39. blood type: A+!!!!! thats me!!!!!

40. nicknames: my brother calls me a goon sometimes

41. relationship status: im married to my laptop

42. zodiac: I was born on the last day of Taurus so I’m a definite Taurus/Gemini power combo

43. pronouns: they/them, tho in some places I use he/him bc The Dysphoria got hog wild enough I decided to pretend to be a trans guy so ppl would take me seriously, but I’m moving more towards they/them everywhere now. 

44. fave tv shows: Dr Fuck, Sherlock (I’m armed with a pitchfork and an arsenal of beefed up tv & film knowledge come on fight me), DOWNTON ABBEY

45. tattoos: in August I will get a bee on my right arm and probably a Secret Word in Gallifreyan on my left it’ll say fuck

46. right or left handed: one time I was bored in grade 10 and tried to make myself ambidextrous but that was a hassle so I’m firmly right handed. Except in archery.

47. ever had surgery: got all 4 wisom teeth out not long ago! I still need to squirt water in my gum holes so I get all the mushy food out :{

48. piercings: I used to have my ears pierced but they’re grown tf over now!

49. sport: first of all what the hell is this question looking for second of all I have a red belt (which is 2 below black belt) in Taekwondo. I really need to do that again hhhhhh

50. vacation: i went to England and France in the summer with my family as a “””grad trip”””, it was lots of fun but my collection of sensory issues extended to chomping and I dissociated so intensely in The Louvre my mom told me to go back outside so I wrote fanfiction while listening to 21 Pilots and chatting w my imaginary friends and it took me like 18 hours to process I’d seen The Mona Lisa with mine own 2 eyes. Also the plane was delayed twice bc we used Air Canada for some godforsaken reason and I had 0 hours of sleep when I went to the Sherlock Holmes museum and I started talkin to this bust of Sherlock Holmes and then I hadn’t eaten enough and we were walking to this bookstore and I said “I need food!” and my dad said “We’ll get it AFTER” then I shouted “I’M GONNA DIE” so I got a BLT from Tesco. 

51. trainers: h

more general

52. eating: the last thing I ate was chocolate chips straight out of the bag

53. drinking: I got another cup of water

54. im about to watch: my entire fanfiction to take 3000 notes on consistency. and by watch I mean read

55. waiting for: my brother (not vaping) to get out of the bathroom so I can PEE

56. want: Orphan Black to be on Netflix so I can actually binge watch it then call my grandma about it

57. get married: idk I didn’t think I was a get married person but since realizing I’m a lesbian it seems like a good idea!

58. career: nurse and a writer. I might just move to London and work double time to write enough scripts I have some street cred then pitch a TV adaptation of Faction Paradox to the BBC and win

which is better

59. hugs or kisses: hugs bc it means my friends are in my vicinity not Toronto

60. lips or eyes: uh. eyes???????????

61. shorter or taller: i’m 5′3″ and I would love a tol partner

62. older or younger: i don’t think I care

63. nice arms or stomach: what fresh hell does this mean. I’d like a nice stomach free of gastrointestinal issues and acid reflux. not that I have either of those but just in case

64. hookup or relationship: I have 300 many self-esteem issues so imma say relationship

65. troublemaker or hesitant: AU where I don’t have anxiety and I’m a trouble maker

have you ever

66. kissed a stranger: noop

67. drank hard liquor: I PUT RUM IN THE WASSAIL HELL YEAH also once someone bought me a shot at a queer dance thing bc it was payday and my friend told me to gulp the WHOLE SHOT and then the lemonade so I don’t barf and I was like “brah this is too high-stakes” so I poured the vodka in the lemonade and took sips and everyone stared at me

68. lost glasses: in grade 6 and then my mom threatened to make me wear one of those granny glasses chains so I never lost them again

69. turned someone down: ya this kid Cyrus used to chase me around in grade 5 and I’d run away always he was weird af one time he made out with a folder right in front of me in the middle of class

70. sex on first date: probs not at this point but I’m not opposed to the general idea when I’m less w h a c k e d  u p

71. broken someones heart: Not that I know of?

72. had your heart broken: c o n s i s t e n t l y in the most fricked up ways god

73. been arrested: no but once I booed at the police bc the local nazis (yeah) were gonna have a rally so we had a counter-rally and I dropped in but there were no nazis except one old dude in a MAGA hat showed up 2 hours late lmao

74. cried when someone died: oui

75. fallen for a friend: Big Lesbian Mood

do you believe in

76. yourself: YA BB

77. miracles: not as such

78. love at first sight: nah

79. santa claus: I wasn’t allowed to believe in Santa as a child bc he was “too much like God” sad

80. kiss on a first date: ye!

81. angels: big no

other

82. best friend’s name: I don’t exactly have a proper best friend but I’m goin with Liam

83. eye colour: blue/grey

84. fave movie: either The Force Awakens (bc I love bb8 and I’m gay 4 Rey) or Interstellar shut up

85. fave actor: uh idk let’s go with my brother

WOW THAT WAS LONG JEE🅱️US. I’m tagging @houseofoakdown @spoonietimelordy @gemvictorfromtheponyverse @spockswhales @raesand and that exhausts the ppl I know but you’re all worth quadruple in my heart 💖

[izenidak]

On Why Trans Women May Be Offended By the Idea of Not Being Considered “Woman”

In a recent interview with Channel 4 News, Chimamanda Ngozie Adichie offered (and quite inoffensively) that “trans women are trans women”. I mean, what a shit storm this created. As a matter of fact, it created such a shit storm that as we speak, Chimamanda is literally swimming through a river of shit trying to “clarify” her “perspective” on the matter.

In the interview, Chimamanda underlined her point by drawing on the ways in which the social identities we embody (embrace and perform) and those that are simply socially ascribed but are neither embraced nor performed, shape the way we experience the social world. In her own words she states, “so, when people talk about, you know, are trans women, women, my feeling is that trans women are trans women. I think the whole problem of the gender in the world is about our experiences. It’s not about how we wear our hair or whether we have a vagina or penis, it’s about the way the world treats us. And I think if you’ve lived in the world as a man, with the privileges the world accords to men, and then sort of change, switch gender, it’s difficult for me to accept that then we can equate your experience with the experience of a woman who has lived from the beginning in the world as a woman and who has not been accorded those privileges that men are. And so, I think there has to be... And this is not of course to say this is... i’m saying this also with, sort of, a certainty that transgender people... should be allowed to be. I don’t think it’s a good thing to conflate everything into one. I don’t think it’s a good thing to talk about women’s issues being exactly the same as the issues of trans women because I don’t think that’s true. What i’m saying is that gender is not biology, gender is sociology”. 

Because I interpret this statement as profound at the least, and intellectual at best, I can’t seem to comprehend the outrage.

Now, I have a couple of questions:

1) Should we not be directing our “attacks” at the interviewer for the way in which she framed the question to Chimamanda? She asks “staying with this issue of feminism, femininity, does it matter how you’ve arrived at being a woman? For example, if you are a trans woman who grew up identifying as a man, who grew up enjoying the privileges of being a man, does that take away from you becoming a woman? Are you any less of a real woman?”

I mean, this was such a leading question and Chimamanda would’ve appeared petty if she told the interviewer that she had no interest in engaging with such a “controversial” question. Nevertheless, Chimamanda responded to the “twisted” question as honestly and clearly critically as she could. Furthermore, with the interviewer suggesting that trans women “grew up identifying as a man” - this is actual grounds for an outrage. I mean, where are the “angry trans women” when you need them? 

The entire trans community should be utterly offended by the fact that the interviewer is suggesting here, that psychologically, a trans woman’s gender was somehow initially aligned with their sex assigned at birth. In other words, the interviewer is suggesting that at one point or another a trans woman once identified as a man. However, based on the novelist’s explanation, I gather that she was actually referring to the way in which the socially ascribed identity of male ( whether or not the gender norms associated with this sex is embraced or not) shaped the advantages/privileges that person experienced or lived prior to their transition. 

Furthermore, the mere thought that a person “becomes” a woman should’ve been the first indication that this Channel 4 interviewer either does not have an understanding of gender identity politics, lacks awareness of the language associated with gender politics or is simply feigning awareness for the sake of controversy, viewership, subscriptions, likes and shares. At the bare minimum, it is as if she did not do the necessary groundwork. If we insist on getting mad at someone, it should be the Channel 4 interviewer - btw, what is her name?

The trans community ought to be focusing their attention and attacks in the direction of the Channel 4 interviewer (as well). Identity-wise, not only is the interviewer visibly white but she presents as woman and female. As a matter of fact, I strongly believe she should’ve directed such an uneducated question to herself. This is especially because Black women for some time have not been considered “woman” or even “feminine”. I mean, it’s almost as if there is a number of common ground/denominators that women of trans experience and Black women share: the fact that we are invisible and hardly considered woman. 

I’d actually like to hear how the Channel 4 interviewer would’ve responded. 

I’m not even sure how i’d respond.

Should I even would want to care to respond?

2) Are we not entitled to our perspectives anymore? When did it become so blasphemous to respond with critical statements to controversial questions posed to us? Are we the followers of a cult? Is “dissent” not allowed? Did we miss the part where Chimamanda made every effort to be “politically correct” whilst trying to remain honest about her understandings of gender politics? Have we forgotten that she once declared that she does not consider herself an “authority” on the matter? 

We ought to do better. As a matter of fact, we ought to be mad at ourselves for expecting her to think the way we think. 

Now, I wish to go into the second segment of my commentary and, based on the responses to Chimamanda’s “alternative” or “different” point of view, a number of people may find this offensive. This is however, not my aim. Rather, my aim is to facilitate critical self-reflection and ultimately the heightening of one’s critical consciousness. Self-reflection is not often an easy process but it is essential in the process of “acknowledging” and “overcoming” or even “embracing” the parts of ourselves that we or others may find “problematic”.

I have a question to ask trans women, and in actuality, this question could be asked to anyone (including myself as I believe all social identities are flexible) who challenge traditional and dominant social identities with our mere existence or our embodied self-identities that do not necessarily fit into the status quo:

1) Why are we so eager to "perform” traditional identities if the self-identities we embrace are not traditional, and at the same time get offended when people ask questions? 

For example, identifying as a trans woman yet wanting to perform “traditional” gender norms associated with being woman. This manifests itself in for instance, the "goal” to be a “beautiful, feminine” woman. The “means” by which this goal is achieved is through performances of make-up application, heel-wearing and essentially engaging in what a friend of mine describes as “hyper-femininity”. Before I go on, I probably should ask where I might find other “kinds” of trans women as perhaps my understandings may be clouded by the most visible type of trans women in western media: the undeniably beautiful Janet Mock, Laverne Cox, Caitlyn Jenner, among others.

I’ve always wondered, if we agree that social identities are all socially constructed and are not biologically based, why do we insist on performing established norms if we are so unique? Is it simply because of our innate need to fit in - to identify with a group? 

Socially constructed identities - whether embodied or not - are “not biology” as Chimamanda states, they are “sociology”. They are “sociology” because they are socially constructed and serve the function of enabling us to not only make sense of our social world, but also, to enable us to navigate our social world with the use of language and symbols which we attach to various objects and ourselves - the subjects. 

Because these labels (and language in general) emerge with meanings attached, they shape how we experience the social world. That is, they shape how we treat (think and act towards) others and they also shape how we are treated. As a matter of fact, it is the outcomes of the interactions of our multiple social identities (race, gender, class, sexuality, religion, etc.), within a given context that form the basis of our unique social experiences. 

We also must remember that the multiple identities we embody are configured differently. This is especially when we consider where and when our unique experiences emerge. They are so differently configured to the extent that an identity (your gender) that may be more important to you in any given context may not be as important to me as one of my “other” identities (my sexuality) in the same context. It is this fact alone that makes our experiences “not the same”.

I must say, I ask the question I asked knowing full well that the meanings of social constructs, labels or social categories change over time. I also ask in an effort to refrain from “making assumptions” about persons of trans experience.

See full interview here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KP1C7VXUfZQ

What triggered my thoughts? 

I live in a unique social, cultural, political and geographical context that has an emerging trans community fighting for visibility, tolerance and ultimately, understanding.

iMe

[edited]

[whereithappens-theroom-blog]

Women's March and the future of Feminism.

I write this well aware of my hiatus, but I wanted to give myself time to cope with being done with school, deal with being jobless, then later the election and the downward spiral my depression took me in. All this time has given me some clarity and has given me something to write about, other than myself. 

As I'm sure you and the rest of the world are aware, this Friday, January 20, 2017 is the beginning of a new era and one many of us are not only not ready for, but terrified of beginning. With this new start to the new America, we are witnessing an extreme interest or more like concern relating to the politics and what it means for us, all of us. 

I grew up in a very political family. Not sure if its my Cuban heritage, and the history of my “people” or maybe it was just my family but regardless of why, I grew up in a very political family and government and how its run has always been topic of conversation for us, but for whatever reason I feel as though this election has made us all more excited about the election process, and thats saying a lot given that the majority of my family members are “secret” racists (also it seems to be a cuban thing I've noticed) and we've had a black president for the past 8 years (ps. I voted for him twice and I have serious love and admiration for BHO). So to say that this recent election has everyone up in arms is saying, A LOT. 

This election started as crazy vs crazy (Republican party) and the democrat vs. the democratic socialist or the former independent. It was exciting to see the ridiculousness going on at every republican convention and the intelligent banter being held on the democrat side. But after months of pointing fingers, comparing hand size to penis size, email scandals, blood coming out of someones “wherever,” the American people were left with Hilary Clinton and Donald Trump aka the qualified vs. the morally bankrupt tan boy from NYC. Once both parties granted the Donald and Hilary as their parties candidates (conspiracies aside) we saw a completely different campaign being run on both ends of the political spectrum. 

Once Donald Trump and Hilary Clinton were our candidates for president, we saw the most ridiculous as well as truly frightening campaign trail. We saw a man that disrespected women, hispanics, muslims, the disabled as well as the country. We saw Hilary Clinton do her best to prove that she was the better candidate by showing her track record as a politician, let alone woman and mother, meanwhile DT was asking for riots at his rallies, was heard telling his fans to beat up those who disagreed with him all while his atrocities were being showcased on every major news network in the country. Trump liked to mention Clintons email scandal which any sane human knows there was no sensitive information relating to the government in those emails, on top of her husbands past infidelities as if it had anything to do with her. I can continue with the absolute nonsense that was our most recent election but frankly, I'm too tired also this is the age of the internet where everything this man has done is currently flooding the web and once you re-realize all of this, ask yourself again, “how did we let this happen”?

Truth of the matter is, Donald Trump will be sworn in as our countries next president this coming Friday. This Friday, January 20, 2017 we as a country have given the golden ticket to an alt right president just 4 days after we celebrate a national hero, Martin Luther King Jr. It is truly gut wrenching and soul shattering to admit that this will happen and to know that by not tuning in doesn't stop history from happening. The only solace I take in knowing this truly upsetting and disgusting thing will happen this Friday is what is happening the following day, Saturday January 21, 2017. 

Which brings me to the whole point I decided to write to you, the woman's march and the future of feminism. 

On Saturday thousands of women will flood the streets of Washington D.C as well as other major cites across the globe to form a protest, similar to the Lysistrata movement of the early 2000′s. On that day, women and men of all ages will take to the streets to protest in favor of women's rights and against Donald Trump, his presidency and everything that comes with it ( Im looking at you Republican party, you're not exempt from this). On this day, all feminists, regardless of gender, age, creed will march together to prove to not just this incoming administration but the rest of the world that women's rights are human rights and its about time EVERYONE knows it. This Saturday is when all feminists, radical, intersectional, lesbian, religious, etc. feminists will march arm in arm, as sisters for a greater cause and why, because we finally understand that all women and all of our rights are in jeopardy. On this day we set aside this notion that the white feminist suffers more than the black, the gay, the muslim the trans,etc. As women and humans we understand that we all suffer the trials and tribulations that come with being born with a certain mind set, with certain sexual organs and because of this we have decided to stand and march together. 

These next 4 years, whether Trump is impeached or not, are going to be difficult and knowing this we have to admit to ourselves that we are all sisters and one womans struggle is all of our struggle. We cannot allow for color of skin, sexual preference, religion or even the body parts we were born with to separate us in any way. God, science whatever and who ever you give credit for life made you this way because you are strong and capable of everything and because of this we all have to work together. We need to understand that our black sisters chanting “Black Lives Matter,” is a struggle we must not only empathize with but chant along side them. We need to understand that our muslim sisters who are attacked for wearing the religious garb is not something just happening to them, but to you and me and my neighbor etc. Look at life and creation, for a moment at least, as this idea that God who is all around us is similar or (perhaps the same?) as matter, it is always around us and is in us, therefore we are all equal. Neil degrasse Tyson once said and said it best that “The atoms of our bodies are traceable to stars that manufactured them in their cores and exploded these enriched ingredients across our galaxy, billions of years ago. For this reason, we are biologically connected to every other living thing in the world. We are chemically connected to all molecules on Earth. And we are atomically connected to all atoms in the universe. We are not figuratively, but literally stardust.” 

If that is not proof enough of how we are all the same and family on this huge time line we call the history of earth, then I am out of words. All I ask is that my fellow feminists realize the importance of standing together in this crazy time. I am hoping that with this march and the ones like it, that when a child looking up the definition to feminism, that the definition isn't followed by smaller categories of the word because feminism isn't enough and it has to be particular to the individual group. I want this child to see one word, one definition and have it look something like this: 

               feminism: the advocacy of all women’s rights on the basis of equality 

Remember, this march isn't just for the white feminists, or the black or the gay, trans, religious, atheist etc. but a march for women, all women. We can't wake up Saturday morning standing together then go about our business after 5pm, because one group of women aren't more or less important than another. After all, we are stardust, each and everyone of us, and just like the stars in the sky shine together, so will we all.