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#also if you'd like to see a different flag just let me know. I went with some of the basics for no particular reason
bookwyrminspiration · 4 months
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im starting a tradition
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gentlebeardsbarngrill · 8 months
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01/23/2024 Daily Recap
Hey all! It's been another long day, but we've got lots of new resources on how to help and things have been very busy!
=Renew As A Crew Updates=
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Sources: Tumblr / Twitter / Instagram
So it sounds like some of the silence going on is related to RaaC adhering to the Global Strike with Social Media going on for Palestine this week. Please visit the sources above for more information, they also go over how to interact with each platform we're trying to woo (I didn't include that here because it's already in the Daily Renewal List)
=Cast & Crew Sightings=
As every day has been lately, the star of today was chaos dad himself, David Jenkins with that article that was mentioned last night from popverse.
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Also for that matter, he's excited about being close to 80K
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Dad wasn't the only one trolling max today, the Crew got deep into it to the point that caseybloys blocked quite a few of them and then they got the hashtag "#OhBloysHeMad" trending. Here are some highlights because I feel like all the tumblr folk need to know how hard twitter went today.
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=== How to Help ===
As usual, please refer to the Renewal Task List for daily updates, but great news, we now have a Renewal Task List for our friends outside the US as well. Apparently there are different effort in different countries, so we split them up. Please let me know if there's anything additional / more countries you'd like to see!
Renewal Daily Task List - US
Renewal Daily Task List - Outside US
The Crew also got super creative and put up some awesome new resources for folks to use. I've added quite a few to the Renewal Daily Checklists, but if I missed any please let me know! Here's some examples:
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UK Our Flag Means Death Updates
News from the UK Thank you to @lamentus1 and @libbyroseitm for the updates!
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Here’s our report from the UK News from the UK As you probably know the second season of OFMD is yet to air in the UK. Today we had an email saying that an announcement about when it will be on TV and iPlayer here will happen “Incredibly soon”. We love the use of the word incredibly! In response to how helpful our contact has been with replies we sent a single email with lots of names on it thanking them. Our best predictions for when OFMD2 might air in the UK is late February or early March. Once Season 2 starts to air in the UK we think we will see a significant increase in interest in Our Flag Means Death. We are currently looking into ways to harness this energy! (Obviously we hope that we’ll be adopted before season 2 aires here, but if not…) One idea is to hold another watch party to coincide with the arrival of season 2 here. Another idea is to hold a flash mob. Possibly at the Cutty Sark in London. TBC. We’re working on ideas and would love to hear people’s thoughts! Please reach out to @lamentus1 with ideas!
= Pirate Omens Watch =
Pirate Omens Watch happened today on Twitter and will continue tomorrow through friday. For more details please reference below - I caught the second half and was a lot of fun! Lot's of parallels and great opportunities to tweet at @pricevideo about them!
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== Articles ==
Max Delivered the Final Blow to the Horny, Quirky Comedy
Hungarian News: Ritkán látott összefogás egy elkaszált sorozatért
== COOL ANALYTICS ==
So something else that I found super cool was this post on twitter by @havethisonelife
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Anyway, I just love that kinda thing, and seeing that come from articles about OFMD is just super cool.
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Okay I think that's everything. As usual, if I missed anything drastic please let me know! There wasn't a whole lot going on on IG today, seemed like twitter was the show horse.
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Evening Message of LOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE
You thought you were rid of me sending love-- but you were wrong!
Did you know you're fucking phenomenal? Like seriously. I read through all these tumblr threads, twitter, instagram, and all I fucking see is amazing people being fucking awesome to each other (and politely shitty to max which is also amazing).
People are posting in various places and saying they had a rough day, or they're sick (that was me!) and you kind buggers are reaching out and giving support and love and I'm so damn proud to be a part of this amazing crew. You are legit the best people I've ever met! (IRL or Internet).
Everyday you continue to impress me and every one of us with your creativity, kindness, ambition, and wonder. You make me laugh, I've cried a bit from some of the posts too (not a bad thing!) and in general just fucking make the world a better place. I can't wait to see all of you continue to shine, which reminds me of this quote:
"Nothing can dim the light that shines from within" - Maya Angelou
==================================
Alright, enough of the mushy stuff-- onto the Rhys and Taika eye-porn. (Is Rhys getting some head from Taika? Badummmshhhh, ok I'll leave now). Gnight!
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fizzywashere87 · 3 months
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Erm... Trans Masc reader x R!Mikey fluff? Pls?
TM!Reader x R!Donnie fluff?
TM!Reader x R!Leo fluff?
TM!Reader x R!Raph fluff?
Any fluff pls
Im feeling low-key melancholy (u know why) and I need comfort
Or if your cool with it, gut wrenching angst that will make me hurt to the very core of my being and make me cry like a baby?
-xoxo Nardo
notes: yes. just yes. okay, i apologize in advance if these are not what you wanted/posted too late... but i hope you enjoy pookie!! i'm gonna write them as hcs so you get all in one AND it's not built like a script!
Hehe just in time for Pride Month! :3
HAPPY PRIDE!
Masterlist
Warnings: male reader, male pronouns used, cussing?, fluff!!
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RotTMNT x TransMasc! Reader
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~Raph-a-Doodle~
Okay, we all know cuzzo's like the biggest sweetheart-
He's going to love you unconditionally for two reasons
One, in his mind, nothing can be worse than his whole.. situation.
Two, you're literally the most majestic, the most gracious person and lover to ever walk the earth! In his eyes strictly- not mine /J /NS I JS WANTED TO BE FUNNY
Raph's gonna support you no matter what decisions you make in life and he's going to follow your every move :3 -seriously he cannot live without you-
Is on top of your pronouns and will threaten anyone who tries to a fuckass skank
TAKING YOU TO PRIDE PARADES
He'd get you like the Transgender flag but like the big one so you can wear it like a cape! -He says you're his hero and heroes have capes :3
Also gets you tinier flags and pins so you can wave 'em n wear 'em -hehe see what i did with the alliteration?
You can sit on his shoulders 'cuz you know he's tall and stuff
Best experience ever bro
He is also adorned in the Pride Attire™
OMG yk like the lil corks they put on sharp things?
You put some of those on him but like it's pride (cuz you know- you gay an stuff /ref) and now it's a festive safety feature!
Proudly displays you to the world an' I wanna make that so clear
"This is my s/o! Ain't he just the handsomest?"
Yeah he's cute
Helps you with anything you need
If you choose to bind he'll help make sure it's on safely and shit
Raph always makes sure you're comfortable and happy
If you're happy he's happy!
Raph loves you and he'll treat you the same (just with these added perks) no matter what- as long as you're happy my boy is thriving
~Neon-Leon~
Now this one-
This one...
Motherfucker's gay as shit we already know-
Yeah no fucking surprise there when this one came outta the closet
He's probably TransMasc too :3
"It's cause I'm gay isn't it?"
Yes tf-
Okay but like he's good to you and that's all that matters
Again, he doesn't treat you all that different besides the added perks >v<
He's such a simp for you don't let his annoying attitude fool you
Bro's gay and homophobic for you /ref amor would understand
Helps you with whatever you need, seriously
Call him and he's a portal away
Big help with transitioning
His room's got a big ass section dedicated to pride
Flags, pins, posters, uhm- what's with the sock and why is it hard as a rock?
"DON'T TOUCH THAT-"
"EW YOU FUCKING WANKER WHY DID YOU LEAVE THAT THERE?!"
aw what the shit man.
Don't speak of that with him he'll get pissy and you don't wanna deal with Pissy Leo™
PRIDE PARADE!
Y'all have the most Gender Fits™ istg
ADORNED IN FESTIVE CLOTHING FOR THE FESTIVE EVENT!!
Both of you guys are wearing the flag-cape thingy I'm not sure what to call
You went with the Transgender Theme and he went with the Gay Theme
Says it suits his color n he's not lying
Another one to proudly displays you
"MAKE WAY FOR MY MOST HANDSOMEST BOYFRIEND PEASANTS!!"
"Nobody's in the way Leo." April would roll her eyes alongside the rest of his brothers
You'd either match Leo's energy or tell him to stfu-
Back to the pride parade-
Nobody actually gives a fuck he's green
"I know a place," Ahh boyfriend
You guys have a blast marching around and the Gender Fits™ are your new favorite outfits
He loves you so much and he will show it through his one liners/pickups lines
It's really bad-
"Are you testosterone because you're testing my heart strings!"
*Receives the window treatment*
Gayest couple in New York but you guys OWN IT
~Othello Von Ryan~
Bro is literally indifferent
It's not that Donnie doesn't care- no he cares tenfolds and it shows
But he also doesn't care
Like he doesn't make as big of a commotion about it verbally
He does show you off literally everywhere tho-
"Ah yes, my superbly handsome s/o, [Name]!"
And he does have a pride section in his lab :3
He's just Autistic ∞
Is on top of allat medical shit for you
And also will help you with literally anything you need
"Donnie, it's Pride Month, you know what that means!" "Huh? Do you want me to like- make gay tech? What?" /reffff
Yes tf
And he does just that
He ended up making you a Lil' Reminder Guy
It reminds you to like- do stuff
Ion wtv tf you want
Just tell it when it needs to tell you to Do Stuff™ and it will
Take meds, walk the dog, eat, drink water, SLEEP
And it's gay LMFAO
Also probably created a pride flag printer :0
He's literally the best omgie
He's smart and hot?
insert ring on finger plz -><-
Except you giggle cause 👉👌
PRIDE PARADE!
Donnie picks out your Gender Fit™ because he needs "his handsome significant other looking his best!"
Any of them masturbators wanna be dickheads? There's now a virus taking over their whole ass phone and it spread to their computer
He swears it wasn't him and it happened to be convenient timing
You let it go 'cause what the fuck they had it coming
Man the love is seen and is On The Brain™
Donnie does literally anything for you and will do it with Pride~
~Magic Mike~
Mans is all for it but in uppercase letters
Mikey's second favorite thing about Pride is defo the colors
The first being people being able to be themselves and all the happy faces :3
It's pretty much his scene
You give him literally the biggest excuse to be A r t i s t i c
Drawing on you 24/7 hkhuyhgygti-
Displaying you like his biggest achievement
In his eyes, you are again, his eyes, not mine /J AGAIN SORRY IM NOT FUNNY-
"Look at my adorable s/o, [Name]! Isn't he sososos adorable?"
The threatening stare he gives after makes anyone shit their pants and they will not DARE to disagree
Mikey will do literally anything for you and is another one to do it with Pride~
PRIDE PARADE!
He won't fully leave you to pick out the fit but he is definitely pitching in A LOT
"You would look so amazing and handsome if you put it with this!!"
Places the cape on you so dramatically you laugh every time
Paints your face for the occasion
Cannot convince me he doesn't make a face while doing it LMFAO
Dating Mikey means you've got yourself a guard dog
Should anyone imply that you're anything besides amazing?
He's sending their fuckass twinkass self beyond where they came from-
Heavily assisting in your transition
Whatever you need is there as fast as he can possibly cause it "cause it"?
Mikey makes fun in all the annoying and uncomfy stuff you'd have to get through and you're so grateful you have him there to help
Also has a pride section in his room
It's so bright and colorful between all the flags and posters and pins
He collects those pins like they're sports cards
You literally give him an excuse to be so A r t i s t i c
His muse istg-
"My handsome angel face!! Look what I made! I seen something that made me think of you, and then it gave me an idea to paint this!!"
Your heart fucking melted oml
He's so precious bro
Holds you extra tight because he loves you so much
He'd do anything and everything for you
No matter what you do or say he'll always stick with you <3
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don't click see more to see the tags. i had a lil too much time on my hands-
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pardonmydelays · 10 months
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"i don't think i'll ever understand musicals the way you do" is something i've heard from one of my friends a couple of days ago when i told him i'm about to cross the whole country just to see one of those (my favourite one!) live in theatre. and i can't blame him. if you'd have told me a year ago that i would do something like that, i'd probably have laughed in your face. life is so unpredictable. i guess i have changed a lot. and i could write thousands of essays about how musicals helped me get through the shittiest period of my life, but we are not going to talk about this today. today we are talking about in the heights, the first musical i got a chance to experience live in theatre, hopefully not last. so grab a cup of coffee and make yourself comfortable, this is going to be the longest essay you've ever seen, friends.
a little warning: spoilers. a lot of them actually. so if, by any chance, you haven't seen/heard it yet and you are going to, don't read it.
first thing i feel like i need to mention is that they had this mini bar inside the theatre and you could order a lot of different drinks there and one of them was called abuela's coffee. i heard one lady explaining to someone that it's actually coffee with condensed milk. my jaw dropped and i was like CAN I STAY HERE FOREVER, PLEASE? for those who don't understand why, here's a quote from the first song:
USNAVI: abuela, my fridge broke, i got café but no con leche ABUELA CLAUDIA: try my mother's old recipe: one can of condensed milk
so this was my first "OH! THEY GET IT!" moment (a little note here: i had a lot of oh, they get it moments, mostly because i don't have any people around me who understand musicals the way i do... honestly, you'd have to live inside my brain). that was the first time ever when i could actually be in the room where it happens with all those people who get it and care about it as much as i do (mostly actors and people responsible for the whole show tho, but we will get to this later).
let's get to the show. so when i finally went inside and i saw the stage, i already had tears in my eyes (don't judge me please). usnavi's store, abuela's door, daniela and carla's salon, all those puerto rican, cuban and dominican flags (one couple behind me was trying to figure out which one is which and it was funny because i knew and i wanted to scream)... listening and memorizing the whole soundtrack is one thing. being able to experience it all live is something else. all those things around me were so familiar and this was the first time in months (MONTHS! OR EVEN YEARS!) i felt really understood. after all, it was all like a little celebration of lin's story (the one i love with all my heart) and i truly felt like home. so that was another OH! THEY GET IT! moment.
i don't think i'm going to talk about every single song here, that's not the point. i will talk about my favourite moments, but also about things that didn't work very well in my opinion (again: this was a polish version so all the songs were translated into polish. and they did a really great job here, surprisingly. but it wasn't perfect, more about that later).
one thing you need to understand is that i will never be normal about musicals so of course i had to burst into tears at the very first song (i don't even know why, i think i was a little bit too excited). i was actually crying in the most random moments like when i first saw nina or at the end of carnaval del barrio because I KNEW WHAT WAS GOING TO HAPPEN NEXT (who the hell cries at carnaval del barrio when everyone is having the time of their lives lol, me apparently).
ok, so the first song. the choreography, oh my god. it was everything. the translation was also pretty good here, i need to say this was probably one of my favourite moments. imagine me leaving today giggling like a child when usnavi came on that stage and started rapping, i was in heaven. also, i have to admit, the cast was amazing. i could never imagine anyone better for this role (and again, i am talking about polish actors because everyone knows who's the best usnavi of them all). he was cute and charming and awkward and so adorkable and also really handsome. he was actually perfect in my opinion.
i kinda lost my mind when i saw nina for the first time. first of all: i already knew who was going to play her and let's just say i fell in love with this actress before i even saw her live on that stage. this was important to me, because (as some of you know) nina rosario is my favourite character. and oh my god, she was an absolute perfection. what a voice, sweet jesus. i'm being serious, this girl is so talented, give her every award (i honestly hope i will have a chance to see her again one day, i'm just crazy about her). and breathe was so good! polish version was amazing, i was so scared they would screw it up, but they didn't, so all's good (this song is very important to me, ok?). also, she's a phenomenal actress, i could feel all her emotions for real. and of course i cried, what did you expect?
i don't have that much to say about benny, except that he was really cute and he had amazing chemistry with nina, so once again, the casting was really good. i mean, he is not chris jackson of course, but i have decided i'm not going to compare all those actors because everyone knows at this point how much i love OBC, i was trying to have an open mind. vanessa was also pretty great, amazing voice and her dancing skills, wow, just wow. i could talk about all those actors for days actually, but i'm not going to do that, so i will just quickly mention that i absolutely loved daniela and carla, abuela claudia made me cry, sonny was the funniest character in the whole play and i don't think i will ever recover after piragua guy's performance (i was the only person in the audience who was laughing when he came on that stage, they don't get it, ok? polish people have no sense of humour and that's a fact). actually, there were a lot of funny moments (obviously) and i was the only person who was laughing, god help me.
so let's get to the first thing that was a little disappointing for me. you will not believe it, but it was actually... 96,000 (this is one of my favourite songs and i seriously can't live like this). it's not the translation tho (it was honestly fine), it's the voice overlapping part at the end (again, the best thing ever, just listen to we don't talk about bruno from encanto and non-stop from hamilton and you will understand why it works so well in every lmm's song). the thing is, you could actually only hear vanessa's part and i wanted to die, because EXCUSE ME. i always sing usnavi's part and you could barely hear a word from it. but apart from that, the rest was fine, the choreography was amazing and it's just something i needed to mention because i had thoughts about it.
paciencia y fe! ok besties, i have thoughts, again. abuela claudia was absolutely incredible, also, her relationship with usnavi is something that you can't see in the movie version (they were so sweet i wanted to curl up and die. i knew about it before, i saw slime tutorial with obc on yt, ok? i'm pretty sure lin would be mad at me for watching bootlegs lol. i just wanted to say this). the translation didn't work out at the very end of the song tho, because when in the og version abuela sings about the "winning ticket", everyone knows already she won the lottery. i don't remember polish translation exactly, but it was something with double meaning, depends on how you interpret it, and i'm 100% sure people who didn't know the plot just didn't catch it. the rest of the song was absolutely beautiful tho.
when you're home. i was so afraid of this one, because i am totally crazy about this song (did i ever mention lin wrote this one after one of his first dates with vanessa? no? yes? ok i'll shut up about this now). oh, they did a really great job with it and it's a relief. i have nothing else to say, except that i was crying like a baby, but this song always makes me cry so what did you expect exactly? one of the best moments for sure. again, nina and benny's chemistry was absolutely incredible.
as much as i loved the club, i was actually really disappointed with one part, which is usnavi's famous "jealous i ain't jealous, i can take all these fellas, wHaTeVaaaaa". i've been waiting so long for this! and they messed it up with their stupid cringy translation which i don't even remember at the moment but usnavi was actually mad at benny and he cursed? ANYWAY. the rest of the song was great and the choreography was absolutely phenomenal, oh vanessa! let me get the next one! (i love her so much, she was amazing here). a little note from me: no one was laughing at the "no hablo ingles" part, NO ONE BUT ME!!! THEY DON'T GET IT! WTF! i was so mad (i am aware of the fact that most people probably didn't even know this story before and they just wanted to see a musical, not THE MUSICAL, which is totally fine. but sweet jesus, where is their sense of humour? they left it at home or what?).
and blackout was that part where the voice overlapping effect worked very well, so all's good. actually, one of the best moments for me as well. people were actually so confused when all the lights went down, but that was just so amazing. all the panic! everybody was screaming, crying! WE ARE POWERLESS! THE END OF ACT I!!! oh, i had the time of my life.
i had this weird feeling that they didn't exactly know how to translate most of hundreds of stories so they just made this song shorter than it actually is. which is fine i guess. honestly, it's better than bad translation, so i can forgive them. what i absolutely can't forgive tho is that the audience wasn't laughing at US NAVY. polish people, you have no fucking taste. i said what i said. and then again, usnavi and abuela's relationship was so sweet this song actually made me cry (mostly because i knew what was coming but also, i was just this weird girl who was sitting there in the second row and was crying at the most random moments).
ok, guys, honestly. carnaval del barrio was the best moment from the entire musical. oh, how much i want to experience it again! daniela was absolutely incredible, carla was so sweet, piragua guy stole the whole fucking show for me (seriously guys! he was just so amazing!). also, those little details i have never noticed before? i can't even tell if the same thing happened in the original version (the quality of that bootleg is actually terrible), but benny dancing with american flag somewhere in the background was so fucking funny and i don't think i will ever get over that part where at the end they were all still dancing and celebrating and nina and usnavi just ran away as fast as they could because... because you guys know what just happened. also, this is the moment i started crying.
i was so scared of it. let me tell you one thing, i experienced abuela's death at least fifty times and i still cry every single time. so atención is something i have to mention, because all the emotions and kevin's shaky voice made me burst into tears right away, and this time i wasn't the only one because i saw a lot of people crying when they realized what happened (i also heard a lot of OHs when he said abuela passed away, so yes, most of them didn't know this story and they were surprised). and alabanza was something else. believe me when i tell you i am writing this with tears in my eyes, i have never cried so much in public. this was the moment i was the most scared of and i was absolutely right because holy fuck. i was a mess. all the actors with those candles singing alabanza a doña claudia! (yes, they didn't translate it, all the spanish parts were left like in the original version and i am so grateful for that), it was just so sad and so beautiful. and this time i was actually like oh, they get it now (everyone was speechless and people were crying).
everyone must know at this point how much i adore champagne and i wasn't disappointed (thank god!). once again, usnavi was absolutely adorable here and people were actually laughing this time (also thank god!). how do you get this gold shit off? (my favourite line from the whole musical) was translated really well and the moment when usnavi and vanessa kissed! with all lights on them! this was so emotional and the audience reacted so well! we were all clapping (it was so funny to pretend like i didn't know it was gonna happen haha i was just as excited as all of them and once again i was like OH! THEY GET IT!). 10/10, would recommend.
if you think i wasn't crying during the last song, think again. one thing i absolutely hate about the movie version is that they actually changed the graffiti that made usnavi stay in washington heights, but i'm not gonna talk about that and i'm not gonna talk about vanessa also being there in the movie. in the original version it was a portrait of abuela claudia made by graffiti pete and oh boy, i lost my mind (i knew about it but i still lost my mind because it was absolutely beautiful). i got the feeling it was a little rushed in our polish version, but i can forgive them because it still made me cry. also, at the very end, usnavi did not only finally acknowledge he's home, when the song was over he pretty much told the audience that we are all home right now and may i just say... i felt that. i was home. they made me believe for the first time in my life i was where i belong, and somehow that was everything.
one thing about me is that this is actually all new to me. this was my first musical i saw live in theatre (and also lin's first child, which is exactly how it was supposed to be i think), and believe me when i tell you i've never had this much fun in my entire life, not even at all the concerts of my favourite artists. it was worth every money. it was worth spending 11 hours on the train and 11 more on my way back home, which by the way we should normalize (people are doing crazy things just to see their favourite artists on the stage and it's considered normal, so why can't we consider THIS normal?). anyway, i don't expect anyone around me to understand it the way i do, but i feel like i really found my thing, and it's all because of lin-manuel miranda, our beautiful puerto rican genius. he made me believe musicals can be cool and i truly wish i could thank him for that one day.
and like i said, in the heights is my favourite story with my favourite characters and i listened to it so many times i have memorized all the little details. experiencing it live is something completely different tho and i think it's safe to say this was the best night of my entire life. even tho most of the people in the audience didn't really get it, i finally felt like i was a part of this world created by my favourite genius and for the first time ever i felt understood. so i think i can say that now: i found my island, guys, i'm there, i'm home!
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fizzingwizard · 4 months
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couple life things
went to Jamaica Fes on the weekend. Bob Marley everywhere. Had my first ever jerk chicken and festival bread. Sooo good. Also ate taco rice and a warm, gooey churro caked in cinnamon which was easily the best churro I've ever had in Japan.
People were all dressed up in bright colors, especially Jamaican flag colors. It was interested for me to see so much of Osaka's night life out in broad daylight haha. During the work week, most people are dressed modestly, in muted colors. Of course if you go to America-mura or hit up clubs you'll always find lots of stylish young people, but yeah, they're not so visible just out and about. Lots of skin-showing and bright hair colors. It was really fun. And so many tattoos! Japan is really opening up to tattoos it seems. Still not work appropriate most of the time (let alone school), but I don't think people's minds automatically go to "yakuza" when they see a tattoo anymore hehe. At least not in cities. Rural areas are a little different.
Work stuff: One of the toughest, though inevitable, things about my job is when a student leaves the school. They'll all leave my class at the end of the year, and eventually they'll graduate the school itself and I probably won't hear from them again. But although the end of the year makes me emotional, it's even harder when kids leave during the school year.
Last hear I had a particular challenging student, A, who was uncontrollale. If we'd had a smaller class, or fewer students with difficult behaviors, we could maybe have spent more time with him and worked out some things that we weren't able to. A lot of young kids who have trouble at school would do so much better, imo, if they could just have more personal time with the teacher. They really want and need those bonds to feel valued and supported, but when the teacher has to divide her attention among a large class, it's impossible. And "large" is not as large as you'd think when kids are only two or three years old. But schools will pay for only as many teachers as they need legally, so.
Still, we did see a LOT of progress in this student anyway. Once he got comfortable with us, he was so sweet and charming. He acted out when he got overstimulated or when he was lonely. By the end of the year, he'd grown so much. It's impossible to know how much we helped and how much was just his own understanding getting better as he got older. But we loved him a lot and we tried everything we could think of.
He also has a very supportive mom who told us she was like him when she was that age, and that she didn't expect miracles, and that she preferred if we followed his lead and went at his pace. Which was SUCH a relief to hear. Because I very much believe that's what's best with young kids. Not that you shouldn't challenge them, but there's a difference between presenting a challenge and letting them decide when to attempt it, and forcing them to attempt the challenge whether they like it or not "to build character."
A lot of parents are so worried that their kids are not "on level" with other kids of the same age and it's like. Every kid hits milestones at different points. Every kid is different. I have a mom right now who told us she's worried her kid wasn't talking much even though her older sister did at the same age. And I heard from her teacher last year that the mom was saying the same thing back then. This kid, back then, was barely two years old! It is completely, COMPLETELY normal for 2s to do a lot more observing than speaking - it doesn't mean they can't speak or don't understand. It's just normal. Some kid are chatty, some aren't. Something I've seen happen many many times as a preschool teacher is a kid turns 3, and suddenly they're a chatterbox. It is that sudden. They have their birthday and it's like a flip is switched. So I told my coworkers that of course we had to respect and help the mom with her concerns, but that personally I thought her kid was fine and would start talking when she turned 3. Well, the kid turned 3 last week, and guess what - even the week before that, she'd suddenly found her voice. She speaks in sentences and mostly clearly. I called it! haha. We are continuing our support plan for mom's sake, but I'm hoping to hear she's feeling better now that her daughter is talking.
But back to A - so the thing about kids like A is, they take so much time that you get really invested in them. Parents often worry that if their kid is a handful, the teachers will like them less and pay them less attention. Absolutely do be your kid's advocate - but as a teacher, I gotta say it's often the opposite! Much harder to pay as much attention to the kids who don't need much support. Because you're all taken up with the others! And we don't dislike kids just because they don't follow directions perfectly. If they did, they'd be freaky, like what are these robot children?? Challenging kids are a lot of work and you go home exhausted every day. But when they make progress, it's like the sun coming out after weeks of rain. It's amazing. You really feel so happy for them. And even if they don't make progress, you went through so much with them and got to know them so well that you just won't forget them.
I found out last week that after fighting hard to get A into our upper level school, his mom is withdrawing him. The reason isn't anything to do with his support or issues with the school or teachers, but an understandable family reason. I'm so sad though. I really wanted to watch A grow up. I was so, so worried about how the transition from my class to the new school would be for him. I heard from his teachers that he had a hard time at first. But now he trusts his new teachers. I went to help out at that school when they were understaffed and I got to see my students from last year including A. He was so happy to see me and I could see that he loved school.
So it's just a shame. I think he's the type of kid who would have continued to remember his former teachers as the years go by. He's a very affectionate type. It would have been amazing to see him three years from now at his graduation. I miss and wonder about all the students of mine that have left the school. A is just very recent so I'm feeling it the worst atm. I gave him too many hugs all year long to forget him so fast ;_;
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dear--charlie · 1 year
Text
Dear Charlie,
It is I again ... :)
Well, I actually forgot about the existence of this blog, it has been ... 5 years? Is that possible? That sounds like a lot, it's scary how much of my life has already passed.
I am yet again depressed and disassociated. This time I also packed an eating disorder with me, so it's not all the same boring routine... Splendor at it's finest.
A year and a half ago or so I started university and honestly, I hate university. I have very few friends there and one of them forgot about me the second she got better so I decided to cut her off, to not feel the shame of being used. The other one is also quite mentally ill to be honest and she also suffers from an ed, which makes it hard for me to interact with her as someone trying her best to recover. I recently had a lapse (or relapse? I can never understand what's more appropriate and calling it relapse just feels like I am bragging for attetion) and when I decided I'd stop it and try to recover again, I had to bring the time I spend interacting with her to a minimum. Maybe some people will call me selfish, but do I care? If you were in my shoes, you'd talk differently. People's hate is just the cost of making your own decisions about life it seems.
On another note, I am going to therapy, yay. I also went to this ed treatment center when things got bad with eating and I am still going there in secret from my family.
Now that I mentioned therapy, there is one thing I really want to write here. It happened almost a year ago already, but it honestly still haunts me. Maybe I am too dramatic idk, people have it way worse...but this is MY note so I can write whatever I want right... xd
Well, when I became anorexic about 2 years ago, I sought out a therapist. She was recommended to me by my friend I mentioned above with whom I no longer interact. It was an old woman, 60+, very short, but this person had something so unsettling about her, Charlie, that you entered the room she'd sit in with a feeling of being somehow tried by a figure of immense evil. I felt something was strange about her quite early on, but this lady charged very little for her services and I am a poor student, so I didn't want to give it up... Until one time. She'd often make weird remarks about how pretty I am, asked me who had green eyes, if my mom or dad, I believe it was already on the first or second session... I felt weird, but decided to overlook it. She then later on kept mentioning another client of hers, telling me that I could meet him and talk to him as we both have a history of living with a very manipulative grandfather. I assumed she meant calling him to one of our sessions and having this weird group therapy. Well, I was wrong. One day she asked me if I've ever had a boyfriend - I haven't yet, so I told her no. She acted as if this was a problem - what a total c*nt tbh :^) - but anyway, she then later in the session mentioned him again and kept saying that he is old, way older than me. I felt weird, so I asked how old? And she replied: "Quite old." ??? red flags, I know, but well, I made her tell me he was 34 or so. I don't exactly remember. Well, she said again that we have to meet up, me and him. I was like mhm she probably means some different time. No. At the end of our sessions someome rang her bell and she replied: "*his name*, come in" I was scared, even though still trying to convince myself that nothing is wrong. Well, I wanted to leave, but the witch literally stood in front of the door and wouldn't let me. The man appeared at the doorstep. She told him he should take me for a ride somewhere in his car at the weekend and asked him if he had time - he said well yes. Then she asked me if I wanted to go and I felt so scared by that time - but I managed to say I'll think about it. Well, after this happened, I was mortified and I ended up ending everything with her.
This scared me so much, Charlie. I don't tell people about it anymore, but sometimes I see an old woman outside who faintly resembles her and get a shiver of dread up my spine. Sometimes the memories of her just come to me as flashbacks and I feel dirty. I felt dirty after this happened to be honest, even though nothing really happened to me. I guess I felt strangely exploited and objectified. I came to her for help but she did this thing...for what? God knows.
On another note, lately I am obsessing over a certain anime character and its weirdly healing me even though I am still feeling very bad. He is not a good person, but I relate to him a lot for some reason.
I also write a lot, Charlie, my stories are probably the only thing that genuinely makes me happy to be myself. I also try to draw when I can.
Well, this is all the brain vomit I can think of for today.
Thank you for listening.
-mv
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baekhvuns · 1 year
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Annyeonghaseyo Baeksussy, I have returned from Jeju and almost lost a kneecap, but overall it was fun and we saw a filming crew (I think a kpop boy group was filming something outside our hotel lmao, but we had no idea who they were). The weather in Seoul is so unpredictable like wdym one day it's 27°C and sunny and the next it's 15° and raining 🔫
Omfg hold on, so much has happened. Firstly I'm sorry about your principal's passing :/ secondly not you imagining Yunho as another guy AGAIN 😭 how is the writing going? Thirdly you watched SIXTEEN MOVIES LMAO which ones did you see?
Also good for your cousin, but come on don't slander MU fans that much sjsjaisjjsjssjsjshs (lowkey I consider being a Barca fan as red flag soz </3333) I decided not to pay attention to football for the time being cause it's boring and annoying and I can't even watch any matches live 🔫 I don't need the negativity in my life 🤚🏼 wtf is up in the F1 world? I see my man Lewis isn't winning :/
Speaking of food, I discovered vegan Jeju and my faves are Lan's Kitchen, Cheesylazy (for some reason I thought the name was Cheesyslay sjsjsjsjskaja so now we call it that) and one cafe/bakery with amazing cakes - And 유. Also 7/11 and CU have some more vegan products and even accidentally vegan ones, so I'm living <3
Yeah Limitless was underwhelming, there's a song called Diamond that's nicer, not really my thing, but Hwa and Yunho sound so good! Though I prefer them on a different song called Diamond 😅❤
I just want Ateez to stop releasing unnecessary songs and focus on a full album. Also not another fucking festival and in Qatar of all places..... good for the fans, but 🤡🤡🤡🤡 and Xikers are going too, KQ is really doing everything to attach them to Ateez
I heard Jimin's song so many times, like it's EVERYWHERE and ngl the single is better and a decent club song, but overall... nothing great. Hybe continues to piss me off!!! And the encore he did was... rough. https://twitter.com/jnksoluna/status/1641461317428215813?t=1sChI621kLP7pKFGzYGTzg&s=19 all the fandoms are beating him up 😭
I really really need to watch The Glory, but I've heard and seen so many spoilers already, rip. I kinda wanna rewatch S1 of AOS, cause it's my comfort show for sure. Everyone who prefers S2 has the right to do so, but don't try to convince me it was better, just say you were blinded by the angst and fluff 🙄
Okay so about YOU, let me spoil you then - I hope it'll sense made - in s4 Joe went to the UK started hanging out with insufferable posh people and "met" a guy named Reese (he was a writer and was running for Mayor of London). Turned out Reese was killing said posh twats and tried to frame Joe, became his stalker, wanted to be killing mates together (the Reese x Joe ship has sailed ajsuajahjsjsja). BUT! Lots of people noticed that during gatherings Joe was the only one who interacted with Reese and like we suspected - that whole thing was only in Joe's head cause he has split personality. So he basically dissociates and doesn't know what's going on. Reese was a real guy that Joe was obsessed with, but they never actually met and Joe was behind all the murders. Now that Joe accepted the truth and still wants to act like a saviour I feel even more icky about s5, he was always awful but his delusional monologues were funny. Now that he has a rich girlfriend and acts like a entrepreneur I'm like 😬😬😬😬🤚🏼
I did not talk to Jin Goo, because we were far away, but the way my hand automatically waved and he was like "🧐😀👋🏻" and then I quickly opened my phone to yell about it. Imagine if I saw Soohyuk or Dohwan or someone else I've been obsessing over 😳 (BTW NEW WOO DO HWAN DRAMA) you'd not hear from me! My friend saw Kim Mingue three times in the past month cause he came to the same cafe as her
TAEMIN HAS A NEW CAT AND THE NAME IS DAENGDAENGIE??? 😭😭😭😭😭
Have some Seonghwas cause I haven't been up to date with Ateez, but I checked Twitter and HEEEEEEEE ❤❤❤❤
We got married https://twitter.com/atinyteez009/status/1640781842432540672?t=HQ0JasZbdnZcSrh0mwBmNA&s=19
???? https://twitter.com/pingkiisaya/status/1641038527386222592?t=rf-qy29H31VIoB01MGPdHw&s=19
https://twitter.com/nobodylikehwa/status/1641041663593267201?t=yV4NaNP93oObBmWvGmQ-Rw&s=19
A photo from our grocery shopping trip, look at all the fruits and veggies! https://twitter.com/1024updates/status/1642163312803856387?t=XFmBjWVzfQPUPet2Eyw2eA&s=19
Seriously https://twitter.com/hwalilac/status/1642036025848655873?t=xSExNqS6vK1kchQpLdQabw&s=19 the bandaged one??!??!
Idk if you've ever seen this video, but it's back on my TL and I love it so much https://twitter.com/BaiduZTAOBar/status/1333451431072784385?t=ynrmLwWHNpo3rrwvr-FJ6g&s=19
And Taeyong baby pls someone free him https://twitter.com/taeyeweon/status/1641077265261035522?t=0Ychhd11werberr33t48EQ&s=19
😭😭😭https://twitter.com/taeyeweon/status/1641079835979317248?t=GVOhB_7A1z51tuaVnicypA&s=19
BTW HWA'S BIRTHDAY ADS ARE UP WE LOVE TO SEE SEONGHWA EVERYWHERE ❤❤❤❤ I'm about to play spot the Hwa lmao. Today I scared some woman off, because I yelled "WHY IS HE SO BEAUTIFUL" jdjajsjsjajahhaha sorry ma'am, but did I lie??? I hope to see Jonghyun's ones too!
Happy Seonghwa day! 🥰 - DV 💖
hello!!!!
Annyeonghaseyo Baeksussy, I have returned from Jeju and almost lost a kneecap, but overall it was fun and we saw a filming crew (I think a kpop boy group was filming something outside our hotel lmao, but we had no idea who they were). The weather in Seoul is so unpredictable like wdym one day it's 27°C and sunny and the next it's 15° and raining 🔫
HELLOOOOO YOU LOST A WHAT FHWNEHKQFHKSHDKC HOW COME 😭😭😭 WHAT THE HELL ….anon i think,,, omg i think you MAY have seen kai doing a filming there stop it. bc i know they were in jeju a few days ago and 🧍🏻‍♀️ that weather has been the same here and it’s 🔫🔫
Omfg hold on, so much has happened. Firstly I'm sorry about your principal's passing :/ secondly not you imagining Yunho as another guy AGAIN 😭 how is the writing going? Thirdly you watched SIXTEEN MOVIES LMAO which ones did you see?
it really was saddening esp bc he just met his grandson 😭😭 actually a peice of history bc he was one of the first kids in canada to drink slurpee rambdks FJWKJDWJHDKW HEY HEY I KEEP IMAGINING HIM AS MR GREY OR HENRY AND ITS WORKING
YES SIXTEEN <3
wedding season, love, wedding, repeat, argentina, 1985 (so good), a man called otto (CRIED), prey for the devil (has the potential to be in the conjuring ngl, too short tho), abbott elementary season 1 + 2 (not a movie but this sitcom is so funny), all quiet on the western front, el ángel, the tourist, dune, rush, anastasia (ended cinderlla), the whale, champions, gravity + rrr !!!
Also good for your cousin, but come on don't slander MU fans that much sjsjaisjjsjssjsjshs (lowkey I consider being a Barca fan as red flag soz </3333) I decided not to pay attention to football for the time being cause it's boring and annoying and I can't even watch any matches live 🔫 I don't need the negativity in my life 🤚🏼 wtf is up in the F1 world? I see my man Lewis isn't winning :/
she really dodged a bullet, he was an absolute jerk who said the n word and then went and said “my parents didn’t raise me like that, know me for what i am right now and not for what i did yesterday” MU FANS ARE A RED FLAG ITS LITERALLY THEIR COLOUR FBWNFB 😭😭😭 WE DO NOT CARE BARCA IS 17 POINTS CLEARRRRR
f1…anon, yesterday was phew, the emotions as a ferarri fan- them being 26 points BEHIND MCLAREN IM ACTUALLY CRYING 😭😭😭 ,,, australian grand prix,,,, 8 dnf, 4 restarts, UNFAIR PENALTIES??? SOME WERENT EVEN GIVEN???? huge expensive crashes, they fucked ferarri over AGAIN they had a straight p4 and turned into p3 after a crash— they restarted the race and didn’t count that lap yet still gave ferarri a 5 second penalty in which they ended p11, no points for them- but red bull got them all bc the fia dickride them 🥰 HAMILTON AT LEAST GOT A P2 IT WAS SO FUNNY BC GNWNFBWK MERCEDES WAS P1 AND THEN THEY WENT P7 AND THEN A STRAIGHT DNF id be crying ngl they’re all too strong to not cry bfnwbdns it was a silverstone again, but at least alonso somehow got p3 🔫 did not deserve it ngl, mercedes not winning bc rocketship red bull won’t let them
and LMFAOOOO ,,, THE VIEWS FBWNDJEK
THIS IS SO FUNNY GHWNDJKWHFKW
😭😭😭
Speaking of food, I discovered vegan Jeju and my faves are Lan's Kitchen, Cheesylazy (for some reason I thought the name was Cheesyslay sjsjsjsjskaja so now we call it that) and one cafe/bakery with amazing cakes - And 유. Also 7/11 and CU have some more vegan products and even accidentally vegan ones, so I'm living <3 /// Yeah Limitless was underwhelming, there's a song called Diamond that's nicer, not really my thing, but Hwa and Yunho sound so good! Though I prefer them on a different song called Diamond 😅❤
chessyslay 😭😭😭 i looked the restaurants up and omg they all look so good 😭😭😭 ANON SEND SOME HERE PLEASE JFVWKCHKC u know what forget limitless, dimaond. THIS. HWA SINGING ANGEL BABY PLS 😭😭
I just want Ateez to stop releasing unnecessary songs and focus on a full album. Also not another fucking festival and in Qatar of all places..... good for the fans, but 🤡🤡🤡🤡 and Xikers are going too, KQ is really doing everything to attach them to Ateez
I heard Jimin's song so many times, like it's EVERYWHERE and ngl the single is better and a decent club song, but overall... nothing great. Hybe continues to piss me off!!! And the encore he did was... rough. https://twitter.com/jnksoluna/status/1641461317428215813?t=1sChI621kLP7pKFGzYGTzg&s=19 all the fandoms are beating him up 😭
you are correct, want them to create a song with good b-sides, gathering songs that are actually their style + diving into r&b’s, reggaeton, dance pop’s etc,,, i really hope they chose songs by the sound and not bc the sound what their storyline is meant to be,,, ateez doing a song like oasis, body rhythm, tell me what to do— no rap, just everyone singing and vibing, give us a summer album with no empty chorus, a album where we can play the songs on a road trip with a car with no roof and just vibes GIVE IT TO US PLEASE 😭😭😭
NAURR THE ENCORE,, and then they released the edited version? 😭😭😭 what GOES ON PLEASE speaking off solo’s jisoo’s solo! my favourite is the second track; all eyes on me, has a better sound!
I really really need to watch The Glory, but I've heard and seen so many spoilers already, rip. I kinda wanna rewatch S1 of AOS, cause it's my comfort show for sure. Everyone who prefers S2 has the right to do so, but don't try to convince me it was better, just say you were blinded by the angst and fluff 🙄
YOU REALLY REALLY REALLY NEED TO ANON, forget the spoilers anon, pls watch it + han so hee and song hye kyo are starring in a drama together ✊🏻😭 LMFAOOOO IM SEEING A CHANGE ARE U BEGINNING TO PREFER S2 THAN S1 👀
Okay so about YOU, let me spoil you then - I hope it'll sense made - in s4 Joe went to the UK started hanging out with insufferable posh people and "met" a guy named Reese (he was a writer and was running for Mayor of London). Turned out Reese was killing said posh twats and tried to frame Joe, became his stalker, wanted to be killing mates together (the Reese x Joe ship has sailed ajsuajahjsjsja). BUT! Lots of people noticed that during gatherings Joe was the only one who interacted with Reese and like we suspected - that whole thing was only in Joe's head cause he has split personality. So he basically dissociates and doesn't know what's going on. Reese was a real guy that Joe was obsessed with, but they never actually met and Joe was behind all the murders. Now that Joe accepted the truth and still wants to act like a saviour I feel even more icky about s5, he was always awful but his delusional monologues were funny. Now that he has a rich girlfriend and acts like a entrepreneur I'm like 😬😬😬😬🤚🏼
wHAAAAAT
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I did not talk to Jin Goo, because we were far away, but the way my hand automatically waved and he was like "🧐😀👋🏻" and then I quickly opened my phone to yell about it. Imagine if I saw Soohyuk or Dohwan or someone else I've been obsessing over 😳 (BTW NEW WOO DO HWAN DRAMA) you'd not hear from me! My friend saw Kim Mingue three times in the past month cause he came to the same cafe as her
AWWWW THATS CUTE 😭😭😭 do not speak about dohwan. i had it away and the name triggered tempted era dohwan and i just rawred pls 😭 NEW DOHWAN DRAMA AND I AM AVOIDING EVERY FUCKING SPOILER AND THEN I RECENTLY SAW THIS AND FBWMFBWKHEKQHDKAJDKAHDAK
AND THIS 😩😩 all i see is older hwa
TAEMIN HAS A NEW CAT AND THE NAME IS DAENGDAENGIE??? 😭😭😭😭😭
DAENGDAENGIE IS SO FUCKING CUTE BUT WHAT ABOUT OUR KOONGIE 😭😭😭 AND TAEMIN IS HOME TODAY???????? PLS FHAKDJWK
Have some Seonghwas cause I haven't been up to date with Ateez, but I checked Twitter and HEEEEEEEE ❤❤❤❤ //// We got married https://twitter.com/atinyteez009/status/1640781842432540672?t=HQ0JasZbdnZcSrh0mwBmNA&s=19
HEY HEY HEY WHERE IS MY INVITE WHAT THE HELL
???? https://twitter.com/pingkiisaya/status/1641038527386222592?t=rf-qy29H31VIoB01MGPdHw&s=19 //// https://twitter.com/nobodylikehwa/status/1641041663593267201?t=yV4NaNP93oObBmWvGmQ-Rw&s=19
them in a law drama would be so hilarious, it’s a NEED 😭😭 jung wooyoung as an attorney aggressively trying to defend hongjoong >>
A photo from our grocery shopping trip, look at all the fruits and veggies! https://twitter.com/1024updates/status/1642163312803856387?t=XFmBjWVzfQPUPet2Eyw2eA&s=19 /// Seriously https://twitter.com/hwalilac/status/1642036025848655873?t=xSExNqS6vK1kchQpLdQabw&s=19 the bandaged one??!??!
THE BANDAGED ONE DO NOT EVEN TALK ABOUT THAT FVWNFJWKFHWK DID A LOUD GASP WHEN THEY RELEASED THAT
Idk if you've ever seen this video, but it's back on my TL and I love it so much https://twitter.com/BaiduZTAOBar/status/1333451431072784385?t=ynrmLwWHNpo3rrwvr-FJ6g&s=19
I HAVE AND EVERY TIME I SEE THIS IT MAKES ME SCREAM HES SO FUNNY AND REAL AND DOES NOT GIVE A SHIT TAO WHO HURT U 😭😭
And Taeyong baby pls someone free him https://twitter.com/taeyeweon/status/1641077265261035522?t=0Ychhd11werberr33t48EQ&s=19 /// 😭😭😭https://twitter.com/taeyeweon/status/1641079835979317248?t=GVOhB_7A1z51tuaVnicypA&s=19
HE’S SO FUNNY PLS THWKDHWKJDMANDKS NCT AT THAT DRINKING SHOW WHEN !!!!!!
BTW HWA'S BIRTHDAY ADS ARE UP WE LOVE TO SEE SEONGHWA EVERYWHERE ❤❤❤❤ I'm about to play spot the Hwa lmao. Today I scared some woman off, because I yelled "WHY IS HE SO BEAUTIFUL" jdjajsjsjajahhaha sorry ma'am, but did I lie??? I hope to see Jonghyun's ones too! Happy Seonghwa day! 🥰 - DV 💖
WAIT PLS WHAT IF YALL RUN INTO HIM AT THE SUBWAY STATIONS KRVWKDHSK LMFAOOOO NAURR ANON 😭😭😭 and jonghyun ones?? 😭😭😭😭 pls take all the photos u see 😭😭
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help 😭😭
sm’s kinda popping with these releases lately 👀
??????? 😭😭😭
this actually kinda of insane ngl never expected this ,, and w miss gigi
SHOT UP FROM MY SLEEP BECAUSE I FORGOT TO LINK YHIS AND ITS A MASTERPIECE
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kisskissbanggang · 2 years
Note
How did I not know that Prowl 6 was out? Boy do I have a lot of questions and thoughts 🤪
What would lia and jisung have even warned felix and chae about? I don't feel like what they said had anything to do with it the accident that happened. Felix was just hungry. I don't get it? Anyway i feel so bad for the young lovers, just picturing their bodies buried together in that clearing with yuna sobbing over her sister's grave is heartwrenching.
How did Lia survive minho mauling her but chae didn't Felix?
I also don’t get why the pack wants the journal? Like they know how to do it now and i didn't catch anything noteworthy from oc's reading of the journal.
Oc is kind of a bitch lmao like I don't get her motivations at all or half of the things she's mad about. And she cheated on Jay right in the middle of a crisis and then she fucked him while she knew chan could hear and THEN she fucked chan while jay was dying like hoe control yourself a bit 😭 the moment of her getting jealous of how close jisung and lia got was peak clownery I tell you
Idk if it's just me but I feel like she doesn't actually love jisung. I'm not buying her emotions.
The moment she couldn't find jisung and went looking for him then found him heaped up on the ground... i felt so sick 🥲 i imagined all my trauma patients and I just wanted to throw up thinking of jisung like that and idk that moment was just so visceral to me because I could picture it vividly
But anyway yesssss i want hot crazy vampire jisung now. I want him to call oc out on her bullshit finally and not be so passive and meek with her 😩👌
MORT I am ✨ASCENDING✨ seeing you in my inbox AND ABOUT PROWL OH I'M SQUEALING.
So replying in order:
Blaming Lia and Jisung: Both Reader and Yuna aren't being fair about this but Reader has way less ground to stand on. Yuna is bitter because Lia didn't interfere enough to begin with, and it's apparent to her that Jisung must be just as guilty. Reader is flat-out making excuses. Her number one concern is how she's incredibly aware how much she and Chan are needing each other. Surely, that can't be her fault, it obviously must be something she can't control and therefore Jisung and Lia knowing all about this meant that Felix and Chae should've been warned about all the possible consequences /s.
Lia vs Chae's Mauling: I didn't go into this because I never know how much gore/violence the audience can handle (and this chapter had a LOT already 🥴) but in my notes, Felix mainly went for the neck whereas Minho mainly went for the stomach. Felix took chunks out, Minho mostly clawed and bit but didn't quite eviscerate her. They each had very different levels of control with their wolves in the moment.
Why the Pack Wants Both Journals: This was unfortunately left 💀, but the section about the Full Moon was in Jisung's journal, the one Reader was looking through. I'm honestly considering a Final Edition when everything is finished because I leave out a LOT when I get wrapped up in different plot priorities; it's a huge shortcoming of mine as a writer tbh
OC is Kind Of a Bitch: YOU'RE RIGHT AND MORE PEOPLE NEED TO SAY IT. She's my favorite Reader because she's downright horrid at times. She's jealous, she's irrational, she's SO SELFISH and she's in denial about a ton of things. In order of biggest red flags:
🚩people who think Chan sucks
🚩🚩people who think Jisung sucks
🚩🚩🚩people who wholeheartedly support Reader
Reader has a LOT to work through in the final chapter.
Does Reader Even Actually Love Jisung: is a GREAT OBSERVATION. Especially when we bring in my irrelevant headcanon that Jisung has never been in a serious relationship before and Reader's last serious relationship was before she was even turned. They both have warped senses of love and are taking it out on each other but it is absolutely unbalanced.
The Car Accident: Mort, love, I'm so sorry if that was too much! Please let me know if you'd feel better if it got a revision to be more toned down. I had been chasing a goal of communicating the loss and desolation of the moment and may have overdone it. ❤️
I am SO greedy for your thoughts, all of them, and this gave me SUCH warm and happy butterflies to get this and respond ❤️❤️❤️
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journal-of-whatever · 3 months
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July 6, 2024
12:14AM
I see a lot of these posts about healing, having patience, and how things will come your way eventually.
Personally, I feel quite conflicted. Like, yes, it's been 4 months since breaking up with a long-term partner. But we didn't end in bad terms. We talked it out and we understood. It was painful, a sad reality to swallow, but it is what it is. But it's because of how it ended that I don't exactly feel this "healing".
I haven't seen him or talked to him in 3 months and I know my heart well. You'd think you've moved on but you'd be surprise by how long those feelings are living rent-free in your heart... But here's the thing.
The last time I felt that in my heart was because I was in this state of confusion. I had a crush on a guy for 7 years but I was falling for someone new. Each time I tried to move on from the crush, it was never successful because I saw that crush everyday, and being friends with him didn't exactly help with moving on. But things are different now, I haven't seen my ex in 3 months and I started to acknowledge the red flags he got. I was so in love and so ready to just love him despite his flaws you know? But these red flags were things he never really made effort to change I guess...
1. I didn't like him saying "eh." in arguments and I've told him countless times how much i didn't like it cus it seemed like he doesn't care anymore and he was just blatantly tired of the situation. But despite all the times I've let him know, he still does it.
2. At some point, the support gradually faded away... I got busy with work and ended up forgetting to message him at times. Because I'm a music teacher, I am quite dedicated to my craft and students. I handle an Ensemble for the first time and there was a concert which he wasn't able to go to. A second concert happened, but he also never went despite promising he'd go on both occasions.. I get it if he wasn't feeling all too well as health is important but... The support for my passions was gone. He used to go in every performance I would be in and even watch concerts with me...
3. We both love spending quality time especially since we were in a LDR. However. He realized too late how much regular dates mattered to me as he only wanted to do home dates just to get down and dirty... I mean. I get it and I crave it too but it felt like he was just after the body...
There's probably so much more but those are like the top red flags I could think of.. At some point, I became conflicted about me knowing that I deserve more and thinking that I'm probably not good enough as a partner.
I don't think I have any confidence issues but I guess I just lack that confidence booster. I'm very introvert and just believing in myself sometimes is just not enough.
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bloodywings · 2 years
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Hi, lovely ! ♡
Could you do head cannons on how you believe Kiri and Denki would react to the reader being non-binary? How they find out can be up to you, maybe talk about how they are most likely to find out because...?
And maybe a small bonus of how Mina would react to reader telling her that they are non-binary? Like they were studying and then reader just gets comfortable and finally says something?
Please and thank you !! ♡
xoxo
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Of course, I can! Thank you for asking nicely! (this is my friend by the way, you should go check them out)
I'll do all three and Bakugou, because I feel like it :).
So here is Kirishima, Denki, Mina, and Bakugou finding out that you are non-binary!
I hope you enjoy!
Have a lovely read darlings <3
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Eijirou Kirishima
I feel like Kirishima would most likely find out by confrontation
He would call you a gender based off of your presentation
He doesn't mean to assume, he just gets really excited :(
After that you pull him to the side and tell him that you're non-binary and would prefer if he didn't call you by a specific gender.
When you tell him, he feels so bad.
Mans will probably be grovelling at your feet.
He'll apologize over and over, "Mis-gendering someone isn't manly :(" with tears in his eyes
After he stops beating himself up, he will defend you with his life.
If someone mis-genders you, he'll be nice about it
"Hey, they don't like being call a (whatever gender)"
Most people would fix themselves, but if someone doesn't, they will be met with the most passive-aggressive confrontation ever
If someone were to say "Well they look like (certain gender) so they are that"
He will go an entire rampage through the most gritted smile you've ever seen "Well it's not your place to say that, it's only your place to respect them, and if you can't do that then don't refer to them"
YOU TELL THEM KIRISHIMA!!!
Has the best heart
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Denki Kaminari
I feel like Denki would find out by seeing a flag in your room
You'd probably have invited him to your dorm because he needed help with school work
The library was out of question seeing as Kirishima and Bakugou were going to be there, and they had already “taken claim on it”
So you offered your room
And there just so happened to be a flag in there.
Denki takes notice of it and comments on it, asking about your pronouns, if there was a preferred name/nickname you went by, etc
He was trying to get out of studying
Definitely calls them “bro-nouns”
Once he finds out he treats you no different from before.
Will also defend your honor, but not as defensive as Kirishima
Simply because Kirishima is close to six-foot and made of rock.
He isn't any of that
If someone dead-names you or uses the wrong pronouns on purpose, he'll offer to electrocute them for you
Offers to go to pride with you.
Probably buys you a pin with the non-binary flag on it
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Mina Ashido
So as of studying with Mina, I think y'all are taking a brain break when you finally tell her
You had been friends for a good 3 months now
I know that doesn't seem like too long, but you two spend all of your time together.
She's always in your room, coming to bother you.
It felt like the two of you had been friends for years
It's not like she ever mis-gendered you, she usually used gender-neutral things for people until said otherwise
You just felt like telling her, you two told each other everything so why not
"Hey Mimi, I just wanted to let you know that I'm non-binary"
She's ecstatic about it.
She felt so special that you shared this info with her
Practically bouncing in her chair, asking you how you found out, when this all happened, she's just so excited :)
If you feel uncomfortable talking about it, she'll probably pick up on your body language and back off, while giving you an apology
"Sorry, I didn't mean to pressure you, you don't have to tell me if you don't want to, I just got a bit excited, sorry"
Still, she has to fight the smile that's trying to push its way onto her face
If anyone tries to disrespect you in any way she will go off
She gives me ankle biter vibes
in the best way possible.
Love her <3
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Katsuki Bakugou
And last but not least, blasty
I feel like you never told him, and you're kind of confused on how he found out
Had you questioning for days
"Do I really not look cis??"
In reality, he saw your lock screen
Which wasn't directly the flag, but it was based off of the color scheme and if you knew your flags, you can tell.
He never commented on it, he doesn't care enough.
I also headcannon him to be Agender, but that's just my opinion-
So he also doesn't let anyone disrespect you
He feels like he would want you to stick up for him when it comes down to gender (Not like he needs you sticking up for him, only when people are doing it behind is back obvs)
He probably asked your closer friends before assuming
Maybe you just like black, purple, white, and yellow in a specific order-
Regardless, you'd never catch him slipping on your name
I feel like even if you did come out to him with a new name and shit he would spend time looking at a photo of you and saying your preferred name over and over
If he fucks up, he puts an explosion to his face because he is just so done
SPEAKING OF EXPLOSIONS-
This man will blow up anyone who dead-names/misgenders you
Accidentally or on purpose
They shouldn't assume
Dumbasses
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Hii, so how was it? Please let me know in the comments! If you have any ways I can improve as a writer please let me know! (remember there is a difference between constructive criticism and being rude)
Let me know if you want this scenario with other characters, or just a different one in general. But make sure you read my pinned post before you ask!
Notes and reblogs are appreciated
I hope you're having a good day! And if not, I hope tomorrow is better! bye darlings
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Paul's Lullaby | part one
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"Sam?" Paul was, he was in pain. He respect Sam and Emily's privacy, but he needed to talk to Sam now.
Paul wasn't angry, he was in pain. He felt like the world had opened up and swallowed him whole. He ruined his own life, and he didn't know where else to turn.
"Paul?" Sam asked, opening the door. Emily was behind him, face covered in concern.
"I imprinted tonight," Paul said, "but she hates me. She really, really hates me."
"I'm sure it's nothing you can't fix," Sam said, ushering Emily to come closer.
"Sam, I'm not exaggerating, she told me that she hates me. In fact, she should hate me." Paul looked at his feet, but only to try and hide the distress on his face. "If anyone treated her that way I used to, I'd rip them apart."
"Paul," Emily said, reaching out. Paul flinched back.
"I don't deserve your sympathy. I just, I don't know what to do."
"Be patient. Maybe you just have to prove you're a different man now," Emily offered a sad smile, but it was the exact thing Paul didn't want. He shouldn't pitied, he didn't deserve it. He could feel his heart bruise and falter. He broke his own heart and has no clue on how to fix it.
Emily had to go back to sleep, but Sam sat up with Paul for a while longer.
When Paul finally left, it was almost two in the morning. He took off running through the woods, shifting when he knew he was hidden by the tree line. He tried to outrun the heartbreak, but obviously it didn't work.
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You were sitting at your desk, staring at your computer. You wanted to work on your writing, but you were so angry at the audacity that Paul had.
You had done everything you could to avoid him the last couple years - and you managed to make it to the first day of summer after graduation. You'd run into him on the beach.
He was just such a jerk, acting like his words had no effect on anyone. Like he could just laugh behind your back and it wouldn't hurt.
But he used to tell people nasty rumours about you. Until nobody really wanted you around them. And then he had to take it that much farther, when you were both fifteen, he took you on a date, acted like he'd changed and grown. And right before he kissed you he said, "I know you fall for it."
That date alone triggered years of trust issues. You'd felt alone ever since.
Back to the beach, he was blocking the trail you needed to head down to get to work on time. You'd hoped that putting your head down and just trying to slide passed would work, but he recognized you. He tried talking to you, but you ignored him.
After taking a couple steps down the path he said, "don't be like that."
This made you look up, astounded that he would even say something like that. Until you finally looked into his eyes, and you recognized how beautiful he was. He also looked stunned, like he'd run into a glass door. He reached out to you, but recoiled, dodging his touch like he was on fire. Somehow, you'd felt even lonelier than ever.
One look at his face and you felt like you were missing something. You tried to keep your cool but you just couldn't. Tears brimmed at your eyes, and his friend Jared Cameron coughed, before walking to the water just to give you two some space.
"Y/N," he said, his voice low and hesitant. Making you panic, thinking he was toying with you again.
"Stay away from me," you warned, taking a defensive step back.
That hit Paul harder in the heart than you would ever know. His soulmate, his imprint, recoiling away from him defensively. He found the person he was supposed to protect, to be needed by, and you couldn't stand the sight of him.
"Just wait a second," he begged, not moving towards you again. He didn't want to scare you.
"I hate you," you whispered, and then louder said it again. And louder again. Until you had screamed it, and the tears had taken over your cheeks. Every time you said it was an arrow to Paul's heart. He nodded, and let you turn around to run off without another word.
You didn't notice him run into the woods, followed by his friend.
You called work saying you had a personal emergency, and then went back home for the night.
Back in the present, you were tearing up at the memory of it. You were sick, you think. Addicted to red flag behaviour because there was no way you were thinking of Paul's hurt face, and feeling bad for causing it. He should feel bad for all the pain he caused.
You looked at the clock, it was almost three in the morning, but you were too caught up in all your feelings to send yourself to bed. You walked to the window, and noticed some kind of animal by the tree line. You lived in the middle of the woods, in an old cabin your grandma used to live in. You moved in when she got sick but never moved out. You liked it. It was cozy. It was private.
Finally relenting, you crawl into bed and did your best to sleep.
The next day, you were walking along the same path on the beach. You offered to cover the shift of the girl who had covered yours at such last minute.
Paul was in the same spot, but alone this time. You tried to walk passed him without acknowledging him, but something stopped you. You didn't want to see him sad again, it hurt you. And it made no sense why, you'd spent two years hating him.
You were only a few steps passed him, so you turned around, gripping the end of your sweater sleeves in each hand.
Paul had his head down, but looked up when he heard you sigh. You were standing in front of him, looking so terrified to speak to him. Paul could've started crying.
"I'm sorry about yelling at you like that yesterday," you said. "I should've just walked away so... sorry."
"Don't be sorry," he said, a flash of excitement crossed his eyes, and you mistook it for something sinister. You tried to remain calm, but you were feeling lightheaded. You just couldn't trust his motives. "I deserved it."
Now that, threw you for a bit of a loop.
Fool me once, you thought.
"I still think we should just keep our distance," you said. "You kind of broke my heart."
"I'm really sorry about that, I was trying to impress the seniors. I was a tool. An idiot."
"Finally we agree on something," you said. He looked at you, and you both let out a small smile. He pushed some sand with his foot. His bashfulness made you want to believe him. "I work just up the hill. You can walk me if you want."
"Can I walk you home when you're done?" he asked, quickly falling in perfect tandem with you.
"No," you said. "But you can walk with me right now."
"I'll take it," he said.
"Why do you want to talk to me anyway? I thought you hated me," you said.
"I could never hate you," he said. "I do hate how I treated you though. Not my finest hour."
"I think your finest hour remains to be seen."
Paul stayed quiet after that. And you were oddly comfortable in the silence. You're not even sure why you invited him to come along, but some sick part of you wanted him to. You wanted to reach out and touch him. His arms just looked so welcoming, and the way he stretched his hand open and shut made you think he wanted the same thing. But you couldn't let him in, not after one day.
"Have a good shift," he said, putting his hands in his pocket.
You smiled at him ,and thanked him for walking you. When you smiled, he smiled. And you caught onto that.
Paul had been standing in the same spot every day to walk you to work. Out of curiosity, on one of your days off, you snuck close to the spot to see if he was there. And he was, leaning against the same railing, in the same spot that he waited for you everyday.
You got comfortable in a cozy little spot in the trees. You wanted to see how long he waited for you. You dozed off before you could get your question answered.
You woke up hours later, when the sun was already setting. You hated walking through the trees in the dark. You started walking on your own, but you had a bad feeling in the pit of your stomach. So you swallowed your pride and called someone you knew would answer.
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Paul was sitting at Sam and Emily's table, enjoying the dinner she made while waiting for his turn to go on patrol. It was Jared and Quil out there now. Paul could hear Seth snoring on the couch, making him laugh. Things that used to annoy him, didn't really seem to annoy him anymore. Not since you started letting him walk you to work. He even got Sam to let him change his patrol times to make sure he could be there every day.
His phone rang, and with a mouthful of food checked the number. He almost chocked on his food when he saw your number. He answered, hitting his chest to dislodge the food.
"Y/N, hi," he said, big grin on his face as he stood up and walked outside. Behind his back, Emily and Sam shared a knowing look, and he leaned in to kiss his wife.
Paul noticed Jared sitting nearby with Kim, and didn't think too much of it with you on the line.
"This may sound stupid," you said, "but can you walk me home? I don't like to go in the dark."
"You never let me walk you home," he said.
"If this is a bad time, it's okay," you said, disappointment clear in your voice.
"No, no... where are you? I'll be right there." He stepped back inside the house to grab his shoes, but the sound of you gasping stalled his movements.
"I'm by our meeting spot," you said. His grin returned when you called it that. "It's so dumb, I wanted to see if you went there when I didn't work and fell asleep."
"You were spying on me?" he asked. You were silent on the other end and he laughed. "I'll be right there."
"Who are you?" you asked.
"Huh?"
He heard you scream, as did Sam and Emily who's cheeky glances turned to concern quickly. "Y/N?" he asked, panicked. He was already running outside, Sam on his heals.
"Jared!" Sam shouted, "Why aren't you on patrol?"
"Seth said he'd do it!" Jared yelled back. Paul dropped his phone, and shifted, running top speeds to where you said you were.
Never in his whole life had he been this scared. He could hear Jared apologizing for the mixup in his thoughts, but Paul didn't really care what he had to say. If you were hurt, Paul would die. Paul would simply die.
He needed you to be there safe.
I knew something was wrong, Embry thought. Paul didn't even see him show up. Sorry I didn't act on it.
Shut the shit up and run, dammit!
When he got to the meeting point, you were gone, but your bag was abandoned nearby. Paul sniffed it, getting your current scent memorized. He took off when he found the trail. He also smelled a retched, filthy bloodsucker. It wasn't one of the Cullens. No, this was different. And it started at the water, that's how it got passed their lines. Not that they had enough people around.
Paul howled, the pain in it was evident for anyone around. It was him saying get here, or suffer the consequences.
I don't smell their blood, Jared thought.
You don't get to talk about them. This anger didn't derive from a bad temper, it was fear. It was just fear talking.
Paul kept running, catching a fork in the scent trails. One way was Quil, Leah and the bloodsucker. And the other was you, all alone. Alone but alive. If he couldn't hear Leah or Quil think, that was a good sign. Meant that they'd changed back, and Leah would never do that unless she killed them.
Go to her, we'll find Leah. Sam nodded at Paul.
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You were crying as you ran, clumsy feet stumbling over tree roots and your own blurred vision totally betrayed you. Someone had come out of the water, eyes red like rubies. And they were so pretty that you just had to look at her. Until the showed her teeth, forcing you to flee in fear. She was faster than you, but you think she was playing with you.
And then if that wasn't scary enough, when she was jumping down from a tree to kill you, a wolf jumped from the shadows and grabbed the woman. And it was her turn to flee. Another wolf jumped out, and you were sure you were a goner.
But it just chased after the other two. Leaving you alone and confused.
You stumbled back to your feet, running as fast as you could towards your cabin. You would be safe in there. Maybe. It was the best you could do right now.
You cried harder when you thought you heard more rustling in the trees. You were at your door, struggling to get your keys out and unlock the door. When you did, you slammed it shut and locked it behind you. You dove over the sofa and kept your eyes on the door, as if that's all it took to keep you safe.
Your phone was lost somewhere in the woods, but you could still hear them. Out there. Maybe it wasn't real.
There was a feverish knocking on your door, and you couldn't peel yourself away from the couch.
"Y/N! Are you in there," Paul shouted. Oh my God, thank everything, it's Paul.
"Paul, I'm coming," you struggled, fighting through your tears to answer. It killed him, but he was so happy you were okay.
You opened the door, and cried even harder when you saw his face. You couldn't hate him now, now when he came running for you. He ignored his usual boundaries and pulled you in for a hug. He was so warm wrapped around you. Your arms were still tucked into your chest. And his totally encompassed you.
"Just breath, honey," he said, rubbing his hand up and down your back. You tried to take his advice, but you couldn't focus.
"You came for me."
"I always will, you can always call me. I will always come running," he said. And you believed him.
"Will you stay with me tonight?" you asked, pushing yourself away from him enough to look up at his face. His features were uncharacteristically soft as they looked down at you.
"Of course," he said. He kissed your forehead, and you felt the instinct of pushing him away - but you ignored it this time.
"On the couch," you said.
"Sure, honey." He brushed his hands up and down your biceps, helping you take a few deep breaths. "I'm not going anywhere, don't worry."
"I don't understand what happened," you said, pushing yourself away from him. "She came out of the water, and then she..."
"It's okay," he cooed, "you don't have to say anything."
"And this doesn't change anything," you said. "I trust you with some things but not other things."
"Some things?" he asked, more amused than anything.
"I trust you with my life, not my heart."
"We'll work on it," he said, pulling you in close for another hug.
"Yeah," you agreed. "We'll work on it."
[requested] [part 2?]
I kind of love this?
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wiypt-writes · 4 years
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Murder, He Wrote
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Part 4 Co-Written with @southerngracela​
Summary: Ransom shows you a softer side, but when the table flips he leaves you with no doubt that he’s still just as dangerous as he has always been…
Warnings: Bad language words. MATURE (NSFW 18+) NON-CON situation, kidnap, violence. DO NOT READ IF ANY OF THOSE TRIGGER… READER DISCRETION IS ADVISED. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!!!!
Pairing: DARK! Ransom Drysdale x Reader
A/N:  So this is Part 4 to our submission for @jtargaryen18​ ‘s Haunted House 2020  Challenge. My writing partner @southerngracela​ is currently on an indefinite hiatus from Tumblr, and I’ve sadly no idea when she will be back. However, this chapter was pretty much finished before she took her break and the rest of the series is also planned out to finish, so as per her blessing before she took time out, I’m intending on finishing what we started.
READ THE WARNINGS!!!! This is a DARK Series… don’t @ us if you can’t follow simple instructions and end up with butt-hurt. And if you’re under 18…get off my blog.
Disclaimer: This is a pure work of fiction and by writing it does NOT mean I agree with or condone the acts contained within. This fiction is classified as 18+. Please respect this and do not read if you are underage. I do not own any characters in this series bar reader and any other OCs that may or may not be mentioned. By reading beyond this point you understand and accept the terms of this disclaimer.
Murder, He Wrote Masterlist // Main Masterlist.
Part 3
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True to his word, Ransom had let you spend the day with him after Blanc's visit. It was a day interestingly enough your mind wandered back to, if not for the change in scenery, but for the change in his demeanour. A couple of weeks had since passed from then, but the memory was burned in your brain. And since, you'd spent far more than just a day above the confines of your room. Almost every morning since he’d ‘allowed’ you to make breakfast and most mornings, unless he was heading out to wherever he went, he then let you stay upstairs with him whilst he plugged away at the book he was writing. That in and of itself had come as a shock to you, to learn he was an aspiring author for sure, but you had simply nodded and encouraged him when he had told you. And you had quickly realised that when he was busy writing, you could get busy reading one of the many books or writing in your journal while sat in the large study and he left you pretty much alone.
Which is where you were currently sat now, curled up on the leather sofa as he sat at his desk, tapping away at his laptop, your journal open in your lap and a leather bound copy of ‘Great Expectations’ lay next to you, the page marked waiting for you to pick up from where you had left off the previous evening. As you thumbed the pages of your journal to find the next blank page, you had to smile at the little doodle of a Christmas tree that caught your eye in the top right hand corner of a page you’d written a few days back, the day you’d convinced Ransom that he should at least get one Christmas Tree. He’d obliged, had one; only the one, delivered and permitted you to decorate it how you’d wanted to and even managed a little smile when you stepped back and proudly showed the finished product to him. Then, of course, quid-pro-quo, he had had expected something in return which you’d given, because let’s face it, he’d have taken it anyway.
You’d seen a softer side to him that day, and not for the first time either. Granted, non-asshole Ransom wasn’t an everyday feature by any stretch of the imagination, but you’d seen it twice now. You paused, and then thumbed back a few pages to the day you were now remembering, the day you’d first been confronted with a very different Ransom to the one you were used to dealing with. One that came out of nowhere.
It was a wet day, an early winter storm passing through New England. You were sure it could have snowed but instead, it was just wet and cold. He'd come down with breakfast, instead of inviting you up. He'd brought you warm oatmeal with cream and cinnamon, a small bowl of blueberries on the side and a pinch dish of raisins, having forgotten how you took your oatmeal. A cup of coffee, steaming on the tray. He'd set up your breakfast on the table and sat across from you, not eating. He hadn't even brought coffee for himself. 
You'd assessed his mood as morose, distant even. You didn't press, but rather waited for him to out himself and his particular mood. You'd come to recognize when he was thinking and this morning, he was all thought and no presence. 
"I'll be gone most of the day," he finally came clean, just as you'd finished your oatmeal. 
"Okay," you replied. He hadn't ever really announced his plans to you before. He'd just come and go at all times as he'd liked, never leaving you home alone without the doors locked. This willingness to let you in on his plans for the day fielded a small red flag in your mind and if you were honest with yourself, you felt like this was a test. He said nothing else, just picked up your breakfast dishes and left. 
In the time he was gone, you'd managed to shower, nap, write and read. You were growing hungry for dinner, having had to skip lunch in his absence. Then you heard it, the tell-tale signs of his return. The clicks of doors and sounds of boots on the floor above you. The jingle of keys, and a few failed attempts at unlocking your door. A 'fuck' and a 'God damn it' before the door opened and there he stood. Soaked to the bone, dressed in all black from his coat to his toes. Was that ice on the tips of his hair? Was he drunk or just having a moment? Fingers frozen from the cold. 
'Jesus Christ, you're soaked.'  You said as you took him in. His lips looked a little discolored, his skin more alabaster than ivory. Throwing caution to the wind, you grabbed your throw from the chair as you passed it by. 'Get that coat off,' you pulled at its thick woolen collar. The heavy fabric peeled away from his broad shoulders and you let it fall to the floor. You heaved the throw over him and pulled it closed around his thick chest. 'You're not getting sick and leaving me here to rot.'
You moved to give him some space and guide himself further into the room, but ice cold fingers wrapped around your wrist and you stopped dead in your tracks. Your eyes moved upwards from where his hand swallowed you're wrist, along the wet fabric of his black sweater, water droplet covered neck, to eyes that were lost and distant, just as they were that morning, but much worse. 
You were nearly as frozen as his fingers were, not sure what to say or do. Worried about consequence. So you just stared back. 
'Thank you', it was barely audible as the words poured from his lips. 
'Of course.' You weren't sure what he was thankful for but you replied anyway. Cautiously, you continued, 'Will you come sit down? Do you want something warm to drink?' You wanted to ask where he'd been but that was a slippery slope. 
'Not here,' he replied. 
'Upstairs then, in the lounge,' you suggested. He nodded and turned on his heel, a glance over his shoulder to see if you were coming. You followed, pulling your cardigan around you tightly as the chill from the basement filtered through you, or was it coming away from him, you weren't sure. 
You'd thought the lounge was where you were headed but instead, he'd headed for the kitchen, taking a seat at the table there. When he didn't provide instruction or conversation, you inhaled deeply and thought of something to warm you both from the inside-out. You felt his eyes on you as you gathered the ingredients you needed, cocoa, chocolate chips, milk. The cinnamon sticks from the cupboard. You were careful not to make too much of a clatter as you pulled the sauce pan from under the counter. 
In minutes, fresh hot chocolate was in two steaming mugs with whipped cream and freshly grated cinnamon. You handed him a mug and then sat across from him, your mug between your fingers. You watched as he sipped from his mug, blowing a little on the liquid before his lips touched it. His eyes closed as if he was stuck in a memory, his expression softening. 
His eyes opened and he sighed, 'I can't remember the last time I had something like this. I was just a kid, my nana was still alive. It amazes me how they turned out from the two of them.'
'Money changes people,' you commented. You assumed 'they' meant his family, or at least more specifically, his mother and her two brothers, one of which had been gone for years. 
He scoffed, 'fuck my family.'
Throwing caution to the wind, you asked, 'is that where you were?' You couldn't have guessed, given he was usually extremely angry and frustrated when he'd spent time with anyone in the Thrombey-Drysdale family tree. 
He frowned and nodded. 
'What happened?' You couldn't resist.
'Harlan's memorial.'
'Oh' . You said unable to think of anything else to respond with, because really what else could you say. He’d attended a memorial for the grandfather that would still be alive had it not been for him. 
'Oh, indeed,' he mused, long fingers flexing around the mug. 'Surely, you’ve figured out I wasn’t particularly welcome.' 
You couldn't say more, he wasn't wrong. You bit the inside of your lip and swallowed hard. He needed comfort. But would you give it to him? Was he deserving of that? Hell no, but your heart ached for him a little. It couldn't have been easy. But maybe this was his punishment for avoiding the ultimate consequence.
'Go on, say it.'
'Say what?' 
'That I deserve it.' He looked at you, 'I know that’s what you’re thinking.' He leaned back, 'maybe you’re right.' 
Well, that threw you. 'I don't know what I'm thinking, to be honest.' You leaned forward, intending to slip the mug from his hands and take them in yours, but you caught yourself and stopped. That was a step that you weren’t quite ready for, or willing as might be more accurate, to take. 'But, I can tell you're hurting and despite what happened, how it happened, you deserve to say goodbye without the rage and selfishness that got you here.'
'Well,' he leaned back and took another sip from his mug, 'that’s certainly not what they thought. Meg assured me I'm still the stuck up prick without my trust fund.'
A small smirk played over your lips, barely noticeable, 'fuck your family.' 
'Careful, Sweetheart,' he smirked, but there was no threat in his words, not this time. He was genuinely amused.
You managed a slight shrug, 'If there’s one thing I learned from writing about you and your ridiculously entitled family tree, it's that each and every one of you is all about everyone for themselves.' You took a deep breath, waiting for the repercussions to fall. 'What happened, happened. Now, this is what you have, so own it.' 
You flinched a little as his hand reached to scrub at his clean shaven chin, finger tracing his bottom lip as he studied you for a second before he took a deep breath and reached back for his mug. 'I think you need to make this for me more often.' He stated simply, and just like that, the deep foray into his emotions and psyche was over, and the barriers were closed once more.  
'Sure.' You nodded. 'Whatever you want.' 
At that he gave a little scoff. 'Sure, whatever I want.' 
Silence filled the room again, your mind not sure what to make of that last comment, and his was clearly working overtime, you could tell by the way his eyes were still glazed as he simply stared down at the mug in his hand. The rest of the time you sat by the table was quiet, and you were surprised to find yourself a little disappointed. This was the first real meaningful conversation you’d had with him since arriving here. Sure you’d talked, but never once had you got any insight into what exactly made him tick. You’d learned more in the last ten minutes or so than you had in the entire six weeks you’d been his captive.
His captive. 
The words echoed in your mind and you swallowed as you remembered exactly what it was you were doing here. This wasn’t by choice, this man wasn’t your friend or your lover, he was your captor, keeping you for his own entertainment, which he was no doubt going to be seeking from you again tonight.
'I think I need a shower,' he leaned forward, disturbing your thoughts.
'Okay,' You replied. 'I'll, uh, well you know where to find me when you're ready for me. Anything in particular you'd like me to wear tonight?' 
'No, not tonight,' he answered with assurance, his voice carrying a low yet soft tone. 'You can go read or whatever it is you do when I'm gone.' You blinked, temporarily dumfounded and he looked at you, snorting a little. 'What? You want me to come and have my way with you?' 
'Is that a trick question?' You blurted out before you could stop yourself, before you swallowed and waited for the admonishing, but it never came. Instead he chuckled and shook his head.  
'Didn’t think so.' With that he rose from his chair, reaching for your empty mug as he passed. His fingers lightly brushed yours and you were jolted by the sudden sparks that flew up your arm and you took a little breath as he passed, depositing your mugs in the sink. Without another word he breezed from the kitchen for the first time, leaving you alone in the room.
It left you perplexed. Completely and utterly perplexed. He never left you alone, even the weeks on your cycle he’d found other ways for you to satisfy him, with your mouth or your hand for instance, but tonight…
Taking a deep breath, you headed back to your room. You didn’t even look at the main door to the house, there was no point. It was always locked and you knew what the consequences would be if you left. Besides, you wouldn’t get far. Not to mention you had no idea where you actually where and the thought of being outside alone in the dark, frankly scared you to death. No, you were better here. At least you knew it was warm, and familiar.
You headed down the stairs and got ready for bed. You settled in with your book, and after a while your ears pricked up as you heard footsteps outside your room. You swallowed, clearly he had changed his mind. But, as you set your book aside, it wasn’t the sound of the door opening followed by his feet padding down the stairs that you heard, it was the lock clicking as he shut you in for the night.
The sound of the doorbell jerked you away from your memory. Ransom frowned and looked up from the screen of his laptop before his eyes caught yours and he gave a little smirk.
“Expecting someone?”
You rolled your eyes at his asshole joke and he chuckled to himself, grabbing his phone. As he saw who it was at the door his good humour slipped from his face and without another word he rose from his chair. He paused in the doorway and turned to you. “No funny business, remember…” 
 “Yes, I know.” You replied quietly. “You know where my family are.”
He hesitated, almost as if he was about to say something else, but he didn’t. Instead he turned and left the room to answer the door. 
The study wasn't far from the lounge merely the next room down, and the lounge was closest to the door so you tuned your focus to the voice speaking with Ransom. You recognized it and suddenly found yourself adjusting your tee and duster, making sure the cuffs on your jeans were even. You could hear the distress in his tone, the guest was unwanted and you hadn't realized you were now in the hall beside him. You noticed he took a step back towards you, as if he knew you were there. 
Linda Thrombey's eyes raked over you, in shock and disbelief. “What the hell is she doing here?” 
As she glared, you shifted uncomfortably, your hands pulling on the sleeves of the duster sweater you wore as you swallowed.
“She’s with me.” Ransom replied, his tone even.
“With you as in 'with you'?” Linda turned her eyes back to him, distaste evident on her face.
“Is that a problem, Mother, because you know where the door is.”
It was a problem, you could see it in her face as she once more looked at you, but instead of sniping back she simply took a deep breath and cleared her throat.
"No, I just wasn't aware you'd have company." Her eyes flicked back to Ransom who simply shrugged.
"Since when did you know anything about what I do on a daily basis, Mother?"
"Don't start, Ransom. I'm not in the mood and I didn't come here for a fight."
 "Then pray do tell, to what do I owe this pleasure?"
"Can you stop being such a sarcastic little shit for once in your life?" she snapped.
You stilled a little, your eyes flicking to Ransom and you were surprised to find that instead of the usual anger you expected, his face remained passive on the whole, but there was a flicker of something in his eyes, something that, well had it been anyone else you'd have sworn was concern. But Hugh Ransom Drysdale wasn't concerned about anyone but himself...
“What’s happened?” he asked, his voice still gruff but there was a softer note to his voice. Linda took a deep breath and she shook her head.
"I felt a call to tell you wasn't appropriate and this needed to be handled in person." She fixed him with a look. “It’s your Greatnanna Wanetta. She died last night, Ransom.”
You froze, hearing the news leave his mother's mouth and you suddenly felt sorry for him. Ransom, stood there stoic, his eyes fixated on his mother.
“Was it peaceful?” he eventually asked, his voice measured.
“In her sleep.” Linda replied, her tone soft.
Ransom stayed silent for a moment, his chest rising and falling slowly as he took deep breaths. His expression was unreadable as he simply looked at his Mother, before he raised his eyebrows inhaling slowly.
“Was there anything else?” He exhaled, and Linda simply shook her head at him, a huff of annoyed laughter escaping her.
“That’s all you have to say?” She asked, incredulously, as Ransom shrugged with a petulantly nonchalant air, and you saw Linda’s face redden as she exploded "Oh for God's sakes, Ransom, you really are such a selfish little bastard, aren't you?”
“What do you want me to say?” He asked, his tone measured. “You said it was peaceful and she didn’t suffer.”
“No, I said she went in her sleep.” Linda corrected him. “I imagine she did suffer, how could she not after everything that happened, huh? Hell, she probably died of a broken heart”.
At that you saw Ransom’ nostril’s flare as his eyes burned into Linda’s face, a flush of red rising up his neck.
"Get out," he deadpanned. When Linda made no attempt to move, Ransom stepped forward yanked open the front door of the house, gesturing with his arm. “I’m not gonna ask again. Go.”
"Ransom..." Linda tried to strong arm her way to stay.
"Are you deaf or just fucking stupid?" Ransom replied, his voice didn't even raise in volume but something about it made you shiver. He was positively frightening when he was in this frame of mind.
You watched as Linda gave him a final glare and stepped outside without so much as a glance back, the slam of the door behind her making you jump.
Ransom saw his mother out but didn't return to the study, in fact he ignored Y/N's presence in the hall entirely. Instead, he sulkingly moved towards the wet bar in the lounge. He didn't even bother with the glass, he picked up the first bottle he could wrap his fingers around and white knuckled the neck, spinning the cap off, it clinking to the floor. He downed a long pull, the amber liquid burning sinfully as it coated his throat, his eyes stinging but not from the booze. 
“Are you okay?” Y/N’s soft voice startled him as he hadn’t heard her enter the lounge. Taking a deep breath, he wiped his hand over his face, and turned to look at her, his jaw clenching.
“Did I say you could leave the study? Did I say you could join the conversation with Linda?” His voice was steely, flat, but he knew full well that she understood that to mean he was pissed and she visibly recoiled in the doorway, her eyes widening. When she didn’t answer immediately he slammed the bottle he was holding down on the bar top, and when he spoke again his voice was louder as he demanded an answer. “Did I?”
“No.” She answered with a quiver, “But I…”
“But I…” he mocked, sneering before he scoffed. “You know considering how smart you’re supposed to be, at times you’re really fucking stupid.”
Y/N blinked a little, and opened her mouth to talk but she fumbled over her words as she frantically began to apologise, which simply served to irritate him even more. With a frustrated growl he reached out and grabbed her chin, forcing her head up to look at his.
"You do as I say, when I say it. That rule has NEVER changed," his voice was filled with venom. “I didn’t ask for your sympathy. And I certainly don’t need your pity.”
“That’s not...” she whimpered slightly, and the grip he had on her face tightened causing her to cry out. “Hugh, please!”
And there it was, that fucking name.
You immediately realised your mistake as his face burned red and his lips curled up into an ugly sneer.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t…you were hurting me and…”
“You think I give a shit?” He spat, and the hand suddenly released your face only to wrap painfully in your hair. Without so much as another word he began pulling you from the room, ignoring your shouts of pain and protest as you wrapped both your hands around his wrists, desperately trying to get him to release you. But it was no good, the more you struggled, the tighter his grip became.
Before you knew what had happened he’d dragged you to the door that led to your room and down the stairs, your feet slipping slightly, causing you to stumble, harshly banging your knee on the bottom few steps where he finally released you, shoving you harshly. Your balance already gone, you stumbled and collided harshly with the side of the vanity table, the pain in your cheekbone causing you to yell out once more as the stars exploded in front of your eyes.
It took you a moment to shake off the daze, and when you finally did you looked up to see his retreating back heading up the stairs, slamming the door behind him. With a gasp you slumped down, your back against the wood of the dressing unit, your hand reaching up to your tender face. From somewhere upstairs in the house you heard another door slam, then a moment or so later there was a roar of an engine, which was followed by nothing but eerie silence.
Hugging your knees to your chest you let out a sob as the tears streaming as uncontrollably down your face.
***** All he could see was rage. Red, hot, firey rage. He slammed the basement door and didn't miss the bar cart on his way out, a full bottle of top shelf scotch in his hand, coat and keys in the other. He drove for miles, no destination in his conscious mind but a rather interesting one in his subconscious.
Headstones came into view until his SUV stopped at the end of the grassy knoll where the mausoleum stood surrounded by trees. He climbed out of the car, bottle clutched in his hand and shut the door behind him, simply leaning against the dark metal of his vehicle. For a long while, he didn't move, he simply stared at the entry, gulping large pulls of the scotch as he stared. His thoughts raced and raced, almost making him dizzy. It was that or the fast burn of the booze.
It felt like a flash of his life replaying in his mind. His great-nana, his grandparents, his parents, a life of entitlement growing up, parties, recreational drugs, booze, women, his fight with Harlan, his sudden plot to commit murder and then the crime, his arrest, and then the visions came to a halt with a mind bending pain and at the end of that pain was Y/N.
Her face, her scent, her voice. The way she felt beneath him, around him…those breathy, little moans, sighs. They’d connected recently, Ransom was sure of it, ever since he’d invited her upstairs and let her do something as mundane as cook. They talked more, engaged more, he no longer fucked her and left, instead he’d dress and hang around for a while, and he liked it. But then, today, after his Mother’s visit, those eyes which had mesmerised him from the moment he’d met her had once more reflected fear and confusion.
And Ransom didn’t like it.
Where that fear had, at one point, given him a buzz, now it simply served to remind him exactly how things had been when he had first taken her, and he didn’t like that one bit. He’d grown to crave the other things, like the way she would touch his arm or squeeze his hand. The way she smiled and spoke. The way she made him feel human, not some ghastly, beastly monster capable of killing someone. But he hurt her, more times than he wanted to admit. He hurt her and did things to her, he was vile and despicable. He WAS those things everyone said. 
He was a fucking monster.
He felt the upheaval of emotions begin to collapse around him and he fell to his knees. The sting started and he couldn't stop it. An outpouring of emotions, years, decades even of built up anger, resentment, unhappiness, disgust, fear, pain all erupted in a strangled cry as his chest heaved and his heart raced. Salty steaks of tears wet his cheeks.
And all Ransom Drysdale felt in that moment in time was utter defeat.
His Greatnanna, the only other member of his family who truly ever cared about him, that remained on his side or remotely understood him other than Harlan was now gone and the realization of loneliness hit him like a ton of bricks. His body shook, his chest ached, his mind grew numb and all he could do was cry. 
What the fuck had he become, WHO had he become? What did he do? Why did he do it? This was all his fault, Harlan didn't deserve to be cold in the ground. He did this, all of this. Again, but why?
He had absolutely no answer other than because he could. 
It grew cold, dark, and late. The scotch was gone, his eyes burned and he couldn't breathe through his nose. At this point he didn't care if he made it back in one piece. He was a piece of shit and deserved everything that came to him by way of a tragedy. He climbed into his SUV and tried to collect enough sobriety to drive towards home. Towards her.
******
You had no idea how long you sat on the floor, but by the time you finished crying and had mustered enough about you to move; you were cold, stiff and aching from sitting in the same position for so long. Your face hurt from the blow you’d taken against the dresser, your knee hurt from where you’d banged it but all that paled into insignificance to the pain that was going on inside your chest.
You didn’t understand why Ransom had flipped like he had. For a few weeks now, things had been okay between you, good even. He’d been reasonably amenable to most of your requests and dare you say it, almost happier in himself. But all this served to remind you what lay underneath that façade. A dangerous narcissist with the ability to swap his face and mood at the click of a finger.
Or, in this case, a visit from his mother.
You wiped at your face, hissing as your fingers brushed your tender cheekbone and with a slight whimper of pain you pushed yourself up off the floor and stumbled over to your bed where you lay down and curled up, hugging your pillow to your chest.
You must have dozed off, because the next thing you recall it was dark and you were still cold. Whilst the basement was equipped with heaters, you couldn’t shake the chill from your bones so you decided that your best option to warm up, and ease your aches and pains was a nice, hot bath. Stretching out slightly, you gave yourself a moment before you pushed yourself up, flicking on the lamp on the nightstand before you got up and headed into the bathroom, flicking on the light. 
You paused at the basin unit, glancing at your reflection and you swallowed at the sight of the bruise that was already forming around your right eye and cheek socket. Swallowing the emotion you felt at seeing your face marked once more in such a way, you turned your attention to the bath and the suddenly remembered that the other night Ransom had presented you with a bag from a Boutique you liked that sold home-made soaps and bath bombs, clearly having been in one of his good moods that day. You had yet to unpack it all and put it in the bathroom, so, deciding that you were going to use one tonight, you turned to head back and grab the bag, but as you emerged into the main part of your room, you were stopped short as a thick chest, covered in a ribbed white tee, a hint of a cardigan peeking out as broad shoulders kept warm by a camel coloured coat blocked your path.
You gasped and felt your belly drop out. Your body immediately began quaking in fear as he stood so close to you. You cowered away, taking a half step back but it wasn't enough to put space between you as his hand gently grabbed your upper arm and pulled you into his chest, a shriek emitting from your voice. 
"Don't," his voice cracked. "Don't scream, I'm not gonna..." his words trailed off and he just shook his head. 
He held you against him. You were sure he could feel you trembling as his large hands pressed against your back. You inhaled a deep, shaky breath through your nose and was met with his scent. He smelled so good, like an expensive aftershave with hints of amber and sandalwood, cedar and vanilla but there was an underlying, distinct aroma of alcohol, scotch you suspected, unless you were mistaken.  
You felt his face press into your hair as he took a large, shaky deep breath, as if he was inhaling your scent, which he exhaled before he pulled away, his hands cupping your face. He tilted your face slightly so he could examine your left cheek and you saw him swallow as he took in your bruising. Something stirred behind his eyes, a sad melancholy that you’d seen only once before crossed his arrogantly handsome features, and his head dropped slowly to yours. He held your jaw in his big hands, his lips on yours. You didn’t fight, fighting was futile, but as the kiss continued it soon became clear that this wasn’t like any of the times he had kissed you in the past. No, this one was soft, like a need to just feel you pressed against him. His plump lips pulling yours in and holding you there and you realised, from the lingering taste of something sweet yet ever so slightly tinged with sour, that your suspicions were correct.
Despite your earlier fear, you willed yourself to relax into the relative comfort. It was like he was back to how he had been before his mother had visited and whilst he was in that frame of mine, you knew you were safe, so keeping him there was in your best interests. Your fingers moved from your sides to his chest, the ribbed tee rough against your skin. You continued your movements as his mouth pulled you in just a little more until he traced his tongue over your bottom lip. Your fingers moved out to and up the lapels of his coat, the soft texture like a cottony suede under your fingertips, before settling on the back of his neck, his smooth skin and hairline a definitive juxtaposition to feel. He didn't balk or pull away as he had done previously when you’d tried to show him affection, and you continued to respond to his kiss, your touch seeming to be a comfort for him and in the back of your mind you wondered what had changed to make him act this way. He broke away and rubbed his nose along yours, almost as if he were touching a butterfly, soft and unsure. 
"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry..." He continued to whisper, over and over. A soft, barely there kiss to your bruises and broken skin and more words, "Let me take care of you."
You were scared to admit that this felt good, the way he was being gentle, apologetic even. Pain radiated from his body once again, like it had just a few weeks ago, his eyes telling you everything he was feeling. The outpouring of emotions there were hard to ignore. You weren't sure if forgiveness was in your repertoire, but compartmentalization was. You looked back at him, and with a slow blink, almost hypnotized, you nod in reply to his request. 
Long fingers reached out and tucked a tendril of hair behind your ear, the other hand simply cradling your jaw. You swallowed hard as he bent down and placed his lips on your neck. Your body shivered at the feel of his mouth warm against your skin. His breath hot on your ear, “do you trust me?”
"I don't know," your voice was breathy as you replied. 
“Let me fix this," his voice wavered. It was a question, not a demand. He nipped at your skin and you shivered again from a combination of desire and disgust at the way this asshole could make you feel, how traitorous your damned body was. 
Ransom felt her breath hitch against his touch. She wasn't fighting him, she wasn't combative, she was...receptive. The thought nearly made him crow for, in that moment, he could feel her trust in him coming in, even if she couldn't verbalize it. He was debating on his lips devouring hers but he was... oh God, he was actually afraid of losing her in the moment. Of her closing herself off. No, he thought, it's best to wait. Ignoring the throw blanket on the floor and the mugs of cocoa on the table, Ransom held her face in her hands. "Do you trust me?" He asked again. She swallowed hard and blinked again, slowly. It was as fair if a reply as he'd get. He could see the war in her eyes, her mind battling with her feelings, her heart. "Stay here."
He left her standing there while he started the hot water. He could feel her eyes on him, watching his every move. He felt different, better even, from the moment he sought her attention when he'd come home. He started the tub faucet and as he brushed past her again, he shucked his coat, tossing it on her bed. He took a small bag he'd brought her earlier in the week and carried it with him. He emptied the contents of a small vile like bottle and watched a moment as bubbles began to firm in the hot but tolerable water. With the bath filling, he sighed to himself and turned to face her.
He peeled his own dusty blue cardigan over his shoulders and let it set over the basin unit. He pushed the sleeves of his white thermal up his forearms and held his hand out to her. She hesitated but slowly slipped her hand in his. He pulled her close and his hands gathered the lapels of her cardigan and peeled it away from her. Underneath her cardigan, Y/N sported a firm fitting white tee and jeans that looked well fitted for her hips and ass, toned legs, bare feet curling into the tiled floor. Ransom salivated as her nipples hardened through the material. He realized she had no bra on under her tee and his hand gently slipped under her rib cage, his thumb padding over her pert nipple. He lifted the thin white tee away from her body and tossed it to the floor. He was half hard just at the thought of her naked under her clothes and now he was solid. Discomfort growing by the second. 
A hooked knuckle traced down her sternum, between her breasts and along the center of her taught stomach. He watched as goose flesh covered her exposed skin. As his knuckle reached the waistline of her jeans, he took to his knees, pressing soft, open mouthed kisses to her belly, just above her flies. With just his fingers, he undid the button, unzipped the zipper and the peeled the material away from her legs, all the while deep blue eyes peered up at her. He wasn't disappointed to find she'd still worn panties under the rough material, in fact he was delighted. His eyes roved down to her black, lace panties and he reached out, fingers gently tracing long the detailed waistband. Those came down next and as she stepped out of the material, Ransom's hands traced patterns up her leg, faint kisses to her thigh, her hip, her belly. He stood and admired Y/N, completely bare, with less than a foot of space between them.
Ransom hummed, his right hand reaching out, pads of his fingers again trailing a path down the valley of her heaving breasts to her navel. He paused as her breathing hitched and with a smirk his hand dropped lower still, over the faint tuft of hair he insisted she kept groomed, his fingers slipping into her folds. She gave a soft gasp, eyes widening as he continued to tease her, her hands reaching to up to grasp at his biceps as he played with her. She was wet, so wet from just this little bit of play and with a sharp flick of his wrist, he pushed two fingers inside of her. 
He leaned forward, mouth brushing the shell of her ear, “Just say the words and I’ll make you feel so damned good, Sweetheart, like you’ve never felt before.” Ransom pulled away, removing his fingers from where they’d been, his hand curling on her hip, sticky with her essence. He backed her toward the tub's edge, his forehead pressed into hers. All motion stopped the second the back of her legs touched the tub. "Get in," he whispered. 
You sunk down into the water, the aromatic smell of calming lavender swallowing your senses. Bubbles covered your body, to the point they tickled your collar bone. You eyed him kneeling as he reached over you, grabbing the natural sea sponge loofah and dipping it into the water before he squeezed it over your skin, gently scrubbing. Your face once more met his and you carefully watched him as he exhibited a patience you had never seen from him before. Those blue orbs bore into you, but still he made no move to take you.
And it was unnerving.
But then, as you stared into those deep, icy blue pools something suddenly clicked in your mind. He wanted you to want him. That was what this was about. He’d spent his entire life with people who regarded him as unworthy of love or any kindness and he was seeking validation. Whilst you could see he was genuinely hurting, you also still knew this man was violent, angry, had taken you without your permission, taken what he wanted from you and when. You knew he would take what he wanted tonight too, regardless of what your answer was, the moment for you to back out had been and gone.
But something felt so good about his touch that you were shivering in anticipation of more rather than in fear and the feeling of enjoyment on your mind started to overpower the feeling of disgust in your belly as your core tightened with each breath you felt against your skin. You blinked, your head a whirl, as you were shamefully turned on despite the depraved nature of this entire situation. You broke from your thoughtful trance as a hand cupped your face, a thumb pad tilting you chin upward just a pinch to look at him,
"What?" You whispered. 
"Let me in?" He asked, his tone a bit contrite and hopeful. 
When she nodded in a slow reply, Ransom felt his stomach drop out from under him. Butterflies grew to take flight like an albatross deep in his gut. He dropped the sponge in the water and stood tall, towering over the tub. He reached behind his neck, between his shoulder blades and pulled the thermal over his head, his hair catching slightly on the fabric. He ran a hand through it to straighten it back up and tossed the garment to the floor. He watched as her eyes grew noticeably wide as they roamed over his taught, well-formed abs, his bare chest. He flexed a little, his muscles twitching as he focused on the buckle and flies of his pants. He'd kicked his boots off as he'd undone his belt, the clank an ignored sound as all he could do was watch her and she him. Ransom allowed the material to fall between them, his pants hitting his ankles and he was quick to slip out of his pants and socks. He palmed his hard cock through his boxer briefs as she watched him touch himself.
He could see the change in her, the look of desire and lust in her eyes. The way she was admiring him now, rather than cowering at him. She was appreciating what was before her. His pale skin, his sculpted body, his naked form. He’s seen her, stripped her bare. But normally he's pulled his dick out and just fucked her. This was uncharted territory, this was new. And he liked it. He liked the way she was looking at him, feeding his ego and willingly participating. This, yes, this was something fun for him. And oh yeah, she wanted this, he could see it all over her.
One foot, then the other, Ransom stepped into the tub and sat opposite of her, careful to avoid the faucet. The water felt inviting, the company even more so. Her one leg nestled between his legs while the other just to the outside of them. She slid her left foot up close to his thigh, bending her leg at the knee. At this new comfortable position, his fingers started drawing intricate circles along her shin and calf. He watched her inhale deeply and tilt her head towards her shoulder, observing him. 
As you watched him, carefully, you saw him swallow, the hollow of this throat constricting a little before he took a deep breath, his touch on your leg still feather light. You wanted to lose yourself, give into the desire that you were feeling whether it be wrong or right, at that point in time you were past caring. You were in this position, nothing was going to change that, so was it really wrong to want to feel something more than fear? It was like there was a game of chess being played between your mind and heart, your gut and will.
And then, Checkmate, the idea came to you. You had a chance here to keep Ransom satisfied but on your terms. You had the power. And as long as you kept it that way you could control his temper and his actions, and get what you now shamefully admitted to yourself that you wanted.  And the realisation that you had the winning move here was almost liberating.
Ransom shifted a little, the water sloshing around him as he sat up, his chest poking a little further out of the water as he studied your face, and you waited to see what he would do. His tongue poked the inside of his cheek, he was clearly going through a mental battle himself and eventually he licked his lips, his gaze dropping to your breasts which were just under the water line and he swallowed once more before his hand on your leg stilled and he squeezed your calf muscle gently before he moved, leaning forward, his large hand once more resting against your cheek as he drew you in for another deep, gentle kiss.
You leaned into him, letting his lips works softly against yours as your hand dropped under the water and grasped his solid cock, giving him a gentle stroke. The kiss stuttered immediately, and he let out a choked groan as his eyes flew open, locking onto yours.
“Sit back.” You encouraged, and he did just that, his back once more resting against the top as you followed him, your hand remaining soft but firm enough to keep drawing those noises of satisfaction from his throat. His head tipped back as he let you take control, his Adams apple bobbing, eyes closing as no words left his lips, no dirty talk, no hissed little demands about what depraved position he wanted you to adopt, nothing. You held the power, and that turned you on in a way it really shouldn’t.
He gave a strangled hiss as you gripped him tighter and then you shifted, letting go to allow yourself to move your right knee to his left side, following with your other, his eyes flying open, a look of surprise on his face as you lined yourself up and his hands reached up, surprisingly gentle as they rest against your hips. There wasn’t much room, but it was doable, and you sank down onto him, his eyes flying to your hips as you both gave a little whimper as he filled you completely.
His fingers flexed against your skin, blunt nails biting ever so slightly, as you remained still, your hands sliding up his chest, curling over his shoulders. He was tense, coiled like a spring, clearly fighting back the urge to slam up into you and you began to work at a little of that tension, fingers rubbing up and down his neck, the index on your right trailing that vein that was bulging along his throat. His eyes never left yours until you softly began to knead at the strained muscles along his shoulders and neck, massaging deeply as you worked at the knots, his hands still resting on your hips, contracting every so often as you found a particularly knotty spot.
Every so often, he would make the slightest of movements, simply because he was relaxed and you could feel your walls fluttering sporadically, just from being full and stretched to your fill. But, still he made no move to take over, until at one point you hit a particularly knotty area at the point his neck met his collar bone and he gave a little jolt which caused you to groan and he opened his eyes, searching almost for permission. When he found no objection, his hands gently started rocking you.
The pressure and friction on your clit was boiling. It was slow and burned in a way that was so delightful it was almost painful. And, before you could stop yourself you were rolling into him as he kept that same delectably slow rhythm, rocking you back and forth slowly, deeply, before one hand left your hips and grasped the back of your neck, pulling you down for a deep kiss.
Ransom pulled away from her, breathless, his forehead against hers. The words were barely heard, but he knew he said, "I want you..."
"You have me," she replied in a soft whisper. 
"Not here," he shook his head, their foreheads rubbing. He glided his nose against hers. 
He missed the way she felt around him the second she managed to stand and slip out of the tub. Ransom was quickly behind her, following, bubbles and water dripping to the floor from them both be damned. He followed her to the bed where she stood at its edge, her eyes inviting him. He took a seat, bare ass and thighs soaking the comforter, knees bent over the edge. His eyes roamed her body, taking her all in. His own deep appreciation for her firm an awakening in his soul.
Slowly, just like she had in the tub, one knee slipped passed a hip, the other following. His lips were on her breasts, inhaling the scent of the oils and bubbles clinging to her skin as his tongue traced a hardened nipple and then the other. As he did so, she sunk back down his shaft again, a guttural groan escaping them both. She was ready, the thick vein of his cock giving a seductive friction against her wall.
Ransom ran his hands up and down her back, long index finger tracing up and down her spine as hot open mouth, needy kisses covered as much skin as he could. His hands splayed over her shoulder blades as his hips met her grind, catching her as Y/N arched into his movements. Her head tipped back, sheer wanton pleasure radiated from her with a heat he could almost feel. His mouth moved to the spot he knew drove her wild on her neck under her ear and the little whimper she made was nothing short of delectable. 
As he began to lean back towards the mattress, he rolled her body against his, bringing her down with him. He planted his heels against the comforter and scooted them both to the center of the bed, still buried deep inside her. With a hand back to her hip, a gentle grip keeping his own pace with her rhythm, the other tangled in her messy hair as his tongue dove deep into her mouth, savoring each pass her own tongue made against his. He could feel her body flutter against him, sweet kisses her walls made against his solid cock. Her hands braced herself against his broad chest as she sat up, riding him with fluid, long rolls of her hips and he shivered, despite the searing fire between them. He was no longer fighting that desire to take control, he was more than happy to let her take the lead and respond accordingly, dare he say he was enjoying it. The slowness and sheer intimacy was something he never knew he’d craved until now and as she gave a particularly desperate roll of her hips he groaned, "Fuck yeah, Baby, just...like...that..."
A gasp and a shudder ran through you, your walls clenching down on him as a rush of power surged through your entire body. You rolled your hips deeper against him, the friction against your clit nearly too much. You brought your eyes down and looked down at his face, strong jaw, piercing eyes, his thick bottom lip sucked between his teeth. You had full control over him, beneath you he was as powerless as you had been made to feel. "Oh, God," you’re ready to sing a song of pure ecstasy as your body coils and tightens under your own volition. The signs of orgasm were just...right...there.
As you felt a deep thrust from his hips, hitting your sensitive and perfect spot within, your head lulled back and you felt his name roll off of your tongue, "Ransom...."
At the sound of his name spilling from her mouth Ransom gave a groan. It wasn’t Hugh, or Drysdale, it was Ransom. The one thing she had refused to say from day one and she had finally let herself go enough to give in to what he knew she wanted. His chest swelled, a warm feeling flooding from his toes right to his head and he surged up, his lips on hers, the kiss sloppy as with an easy movement he flipped them both so she was underneath him, all semblance of self-control now lost as her voice echoed round his mind, the soft, sultry way in which she’d cried his name repeating like a prayer. 
"Gimme one more, baby, just one more..." his hips were thrusting hard, but not painfully so."Say it again, please," his voice was laced with fire and emotion, a whimper or sob nearly on his lips.
"Ransom...." she replied coming again and his fingers gripped into her skin, holding her in place as his seed shot deep into her, filling her, his entire body shaking, no nearly convusling as he came.
Breathlessly, they laid there, his body gently caging her in, her fingers curling around his neck and into the nape of his hair.
“Thank you.” He whispered, and you blinked, not quite sure you’d heard him right.
“What for?” You asked, your breath still punctuated by your gasps as you came down from your high.”
“For trusting me.” His nose nudged yours and you looked into his eyes, “for forgiving me.”
“I’m not sure I have.” You replied honestly, and a frown furrowed his brown before he sighed and closed his eyes, his head hanging a little.
“That’s fair, I suppose.” He looked back at you before he moved, pulling out of you and immediately you missed his presence, the heat of his body gone as he rolled to his side. You waited for him to rise and dress as he usually did but he made no effort to move. Instead he lay still, looking up at the ceiling before he turned onto his side, his fingers gently trailing down your bruised cheek as it brushed the soft pillow when you turned to look at him.
“Can I stay?” He asked.
It was a pointless question. Because, let’s face it, you didn’t have a choice. If he didn’t want to go he wasn’t going to, and it wasn’t like you could leave. But, nevertheless, the fact he had bothered to ask you in the first place was another first. And you found yourself suddenly believing that if you did say no, he would leave.
Instead you nodded, and he gave you a small smile, not a sneer or a smirk, a genuine smile that lit up his handsome face as he leaned over and pressed his lips tenderly to yours.
Together you managed to get yourself under the duvet before you reached up for the lamp and clicked it off before settling on your side, facing away from him.
“My err, my cheek hurts.” You said quietly, offering him an explanation as to why you’d turned your back on him. He gave a small sigh and one of his arms snaked under your neck, the other curled round your bare body, resting just underneath your breasts. He gave your shoulder a gentle kiss, another unspoken apology before you felt him tug you back into him, your back pressing against the hard wall of his chest.
He was the first to fall asleep, his body spent as was yours but you laid there still feeling the electricity roll through your muscles, tiredness settling into your bones. You had given him what he wanted but kept your ground and done it on your terms. It's what he'd needed this entire time, to hear his name from your lips, to be wanted to be cared about, to be "loved". You internally scoffed. To be loved... you doubted he had any idea what that actually meant, to be loved unconditionally. But as you’d questioned the other day over hot chocolate, was that really his fault?
This situation was fucked up. What you were doing was fucked up, but, if giving him what he wanted and what he needed kept you in the driving seat, so to speak, you could work with it.
**** Part 5
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westiec · 3 years
Text
June 17: Chengxian 💜🖤💕
childhood friends to lovers/QPPs, ace Jiang Cheng, bi & aro Wei Wuxian, modern AU
(A/N: If you're wondering about a certain other someone, he will have a wonderful, full life of his own in Suzhou in this AU but is not in this story. 💙 There are some brief mentions of offscreen ace-antagonism, not by anyone we know.)
Read on ao3
Jiang Cheng had been Wei Ying's best friend in the whole world for his entire life.
Okay. Well, not quite his entire life, but certainly since Wei Ying’s parents moved to California when he was little little, which was about as far back as Wei Ying could remember anyway. Wei Ying’s baba and Jiang Cheng’s baba had grown up in Wuhan together and been best friends when they were kids, so naturally, when Wei Ying’s family moved into the same neighborhood as the Jiangs, it made perfect sense for Wei Ying and Jiang Cheng to become best friends too.
It was Jiang Cheng who had taught Wei Ying that he didn't have to be afraid of dogs, by introducing him to Princess, Jasmine, and Lil' Love. Lil' Love lived up to her name, coming and quietly sitting in all her fluffy glory on Wei Ying’s lap every time he went over to play.
It was also Jiang Cheng who Wei Ying got drunk with for the first time. They snuck booze from the cabinet where Wei Ying’s parents kept it and laughed at the faces each other made with every shot until they stopped tasting the harsh burn, and then laughing more just because.
(Wei Ying’s mom had not laughed, not at the time, when the two teens had been sick as anything the next morning, but instead made them a gloriously greasy late breakfast and gave them lots of advice about proper hydration.
Then she told Jiang Cheng’s mom and let her scold them.)
It was Jiang Cheng who came out first, their first semester in college, when he told Wei Ying he didn't think he wanted to have sex with anyone, ever, and asked if Wei Ying thought that meant no one would ever want to date him. Wei Ying hugged him tight and told him he didn't know about everyone out there, but he knew Jiang Cheng was the best guy in the world and would be an awesome boyfriend, and he'd fight anyone who said differently.
Jiang Cheng found a group on campus for third culture LBGT kids, and Wei Ying went with him, as a supportive ally.
Which was how Wei Ying figured out that he was not just a supportive ally.
In listening to the others talk about orientation and identity and attraction and cultural expectations, Wei Ying realized that what he'd always assumed was normal—finding all kinds of people physically attractive, regardless of their gender—was actually his bisexuality. So that was kind of cool.
"So yeah, now we can be queer together!" Wei Ying said, when he excitedly shared his newfound realization with Jiang Cheng.
Jiang Cheng snorted. "Yeah, 'all' and 'nothing,'" he joked.
It was Jiang Cheng who'd helped him practice what to say to his parents when he wanted to change his major at the end of sophomore year, and Jiang Cheng who reminded him to eat and sleep and "take a fucking break, Wei Ying," those next couple semesters when he took way too many hours so he wouldn't have to rack up a whole extra year's worth of student loans to finish his new degree plan.
It was Jiang Cheng who graduated first, on a gorgeous blue-skyed sunny day in May, and Jiang Cheng who suggested Wei Ying keep living with him at his new apartment, so he wouldn't have to try to find a one-semester lease until he finished in December.
(They renewed the lease together every time.)
Jiang Cheng ribbed him playfully each time Wei Ying met someone new, but he was always there each times things fizzled out after a few months for reasons that never quite made sense to Wei Ying.
Jiang Cheng occasionally dated too, and Wei Ying was glad he never did have to fight anybody—though he did drive Jiang Cheng to the emergency room the time he came home with split knuckles from punching a guy who, "seemed to think I didn't know my own mind about certain things."
But dating sucked for everybody, right? It wasn't like Wei Ying or Jiang Cheng were in any hurry to settle down and do the whole spouse and kids thing or whatever. Wei Ying tried to imagine it and just... couldn't, though the image of Jiang Cheng with a baby was admittedly pretty cute.
~
It was not Jiang Cheng, but Jiang Yanli, a few months after she proposed to her girlfriend and they started planning their wedding, who Wei Ying finally asked, "Yanli-jie, how does a person decide someone else is their person?"
Jiang Yanli looked across the room to where Jiang Cheng was showing her soon-to-be-wife how to put side spin on a billiards ball and smiled. "I think you just know," she said. "You meet someone and you get to know them, spend time together, then one day you realize you love them and want to build the rest of your life with them."
Wei Ying wrinkled his nose. "I dunno if it works that way for me. Just some random person? I've never met anyone I can imagine wanting to live with all the time. Well, besides—huh..." he cut off suddenly and darted a look over at Jiang Yanli, who just calmly sipped her drink.
"Have you ever told him that?" she asked, after a moment where Wei Ying reassessed his entire life and dating history. "I think he might appreciate hearing it."
"I... huh. Yanli-jie, you're kinda blowing my mind here," he complained.
"I gathered," she said wryly, before fixing him with a smile that made all the hair on the back of his neck stand up. "Of course, I trust," she told him, "that I do not need to explain to you of all people how very dearly I hold my didi's happiness and well-being."
He swallowed and raised three fingers in the salute he'd used ever since the summer that—hah—he and Jiang Cheng had decided as kids that they would make their own oath of brotherhood like the heroes of their favorite show. "I, Wei Ying, swear to you that I would kick my own ass before I did anything to hurt him."
Jiang Yanli leaned over to knock her shoulder against his and nodded. "That's what I thought."
~
Turned out, dating Jiang Cheng didn't suck at all.
It felt easy in a way Wei Ying’s past dates never had, less like trying to keep up with a game whose rules everybody knew except him, more like... well, like spending time with his best friend in the whole world, but on purpose. There was also a tension in the back of Wei Ying’s mind that seemed to have lifted, though he couldn't quite pinpoint what it was that had gone.
It was Jiang Cheng who helped him figure it out.
"I think it's that now I'm able to count on this. On us," he said, when Wei Ying brought it up. "Before, whenever you went out with someone new, I wondered if this would be the time you'd find someone to fall in love with and leave me behind."
"Aww, Chengcheng! I would never!"
Jiang Cheng huffed and rolled his eyes, but his cheeks were pink. "Well, I know that now," he said, a pleased little smile breaking through his attempts at a scowl.
"As long as you're sure—" Wei Ying began, still getting used to thinking about himself with the word "aromantic." Still a so very sure that Jiang Cheng deserved to be fallen in love with.
"Hey!" Jiang Cheng cut him off. "None of that. I know you. And I know you don't see it this way, but I personally think it's pretty damn romantic that you choose to love me, on purpose."
"I simply have exquisite taste in life partners," Wei Ying sniffed, embarassed the way he always got when Jiang Cheng declared something he'd done "romantic."
"You do," Jiang Cheng agreed. "Someone told me a long time ago I was the best guy in the world and would make an awesome boyfriend, and that he would fight anyone who said differently."
Wei Ying laughed. "That's you and your sister I've promised to kick my own ass if I ever break your heart, then. Guess I'll just have to keep you forever."
"Damn right, you will," Jiang Cheng agreed, grinning smug and happy and breathtakingly beautiful. Wei Ying leaned across the couch to give him a sweet, closed-mouth kiss—the kind Jiang Cheng had shyly admitted he actually did like, a lot—and smiled too, at how lucky he'd gotten to be with his best friend in the whole world for his entire life.
🖤💜
Today's (extremely long!) thread was inspired by this WONDERFUL art of ace Jiang Cheng and bi & aro Wei Ying! Go give Midori some love on Twitter!
I spent a nonzero amount of time googling to double check when various terms and flags came into vogue, so if you're wondering, WWX & JC were in college in the early 2000s, before the ace and aro flags were designed. By the time they get themselves figured out, they can get their cute wristbands.
...which, yes, means these dingdongs spent about a solid decade living together before realizing that was what they wanted to do forever. 😉
This also means Jiang Yanli and her unnamed wife here are getting married between when California started recognizing same-sex marriages in 2008 and the Obergefell v. Hodges ruling in 2015! THIS SHIT'S RECENT!!!
Happy Pride, thank you for reading, check out more LGBTQIA+ sweetness on my #PrideMonthSnippets Masterpost!
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cheelduh · 4 years
Text
How to bet your way into someone’s heart. (Highschool AU)
Pairing: Childe x fem!reader
Warnings: Fake weed. Poor Signora smh. Oh yes, lots of swearing. UNEDITED ASF IM LAZY BYE.
Synopsis: Childe is being an infatuated idiot, Lisa has eyes for vending machine chocolate, and Kaeya is desperately in need of a pencil. With all these distractions, there’s no way in hell you’ll be able focus on the task at hand.
This is crack.
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I don’t have time.
You think as you race down the hallway, shoes slapping against the floor as you expertly dodge multiple students in your way.
Bullet. You're as fast as a bullet, because everyone around you is a blur and you don't stop, can't stop, not until you meet your target.
It's funny how one can accomplish many challenges and feats they were unable to, merely due to pressure. Pressure is a twisted ugly thing that can gnaw its way into the pit of your stomach and grow like a parasite. Pressure is a parasite that can either bring the best in you, or the worst, but at the cost of one's peace of mind.
"Move it Signora!" You shouted a warning at the senior blocking your way. There wasn't any time for you slow down at that point, and you'd risk bumping into the breakfast club's stall if you swerved to the side, sending juice flying everywhere.
Signora's eyes widened momentarily, getting the gist albeit her anger, and choosing to back up flatly against the locker.
Her lipstick nearly slips from her fingers as you swerve past, a thick gust of wind in your wake.
It messes with the hair she woke up two hours early for.
Signora plots her revenge. You still don't have time.
You nearly kick the door to your home room down, but you can't risk the perfect image your teachers have of you. So you pat down your t-shirt, take five tempting deep breaths, and tentatively knock the door.
The door opens and you're met with a young man, familiar amber pupils welcoming you.
You try not to huff and puff at the cost of your stamina. Thinking back, there's no way in hell you could have physically been that fast.
"Good morning Y/N," Your homeroom teacher gives you a small smile, moving aside to let you in. "Class is just about to start."
You check your watch, then turn to him with an apologetic tone, trying not to crack under the eyes of your classmates. "I'm so sorry Mr.Zhongli, I slept through my alarm."
Your idiot ass forgot to set one because you studied till four in the morning.
"You're like thirty seconds late, cut the shit." Beidou boos from the back, causing your stance to stiffen.
"I don't wanna hear it Beidou. If anything, you're two periods earlier than usual." Ningguang calls her out for you, but you have a feeling it's more so on behalf of a personal vendetta.
Ignoring the two bickering, Mr.Zhongli gives you the handout. "Take a seat. Do not fret over such minuscule things dear."
Relief washes over you. Your impeccable attendance is not on the line.
Childe tries to flag you down next to him but you send him a pointed glare and sit next to Lisa instead.
"You should give him a chance you know." Lisa doesn't even have to open her eyes to know what's going on.
"Please," You scoff, digging through your bags to collect your notes. "As if I have the time to fool around with a shady kid like him."
Your friend sighs in disapproval, and makes no move to take out her own notes as Mr.Zhongli begins the lecture on the Archon war.
"You should really pay attention." It bothers you that she doesn't, but then again it's not your place to tell her what to do or not to do.
"I don't need to." She yawns, blinking an eye open towards you. "I have you after all."
"I'm tired of saving your ass." You groan and pull a pen out of your pocket to get started on the exercises as Mr.Zhongli talks in the background.
The course outline contained all the topic, and you made sure to teach yourself as much as you could before class to stay ahead.
Immersed in the worksheet, you blinked away your sleep and tried to answer as many questions as you could at the moment. You didn't hear the slight shift next to you, and the change of breathing, or the rate of which time went by.
A familiar scent makes its way into your nostrils.
"Lisa. Why do you smell like mango juul juice." You know the scent from when Signora blew a mango flavoured fog in your face yesterday at lunch when you said you were hungry.
A chuckle erupts and you freeze in place. "That's because I'm not Lisa."
You blink. Once, twice, and then crane your head to the side to meet a pair of teasing cerulean eyes.
Fingers loosening in shock, the pen drops on the desk with a short thud.
You whisk your head towards the front of the classroom, and Mr.Zhongli is nowhere to be seen.
"There's no saving you now." Childe's smirk widens, and he scoots closer to you. "Mr.Zhongli had to get something from the staff room. The staff room is near the cafeteria."
"Which is also near the merch stall." You grumbled, bringing both hands to massage your temples as a headache is beginning it's reign.
"Tsk tsk. Smart girl. I'd like to add that he's forgotten his wallet in his office as well, which is in the south wing."
"Son of a..." You mutter underneath your breath, and opt to scoot further back, but your efforts are futile because your desk is in a corner.
Your next beacon of hope is Lisa, so you scan the room full of chattering students, only to find her pestering her crush, Jean.
Shit...there's nothing getting you out of this one.
"What did it take?" Is your only question, the despair starting to brew. How much did it take for your best friend to betray you?
"A dollar and fifty for vending machine chocolate."
You take a moment to breathe, calming your nerves and burying down the urge to screech. "What will it take?"
"For what?" Childe replies back innocently, and you can't believe how fast he can change masks. You almost give in.
"For you to leave me alone."
"Aww come on girlie," He whines, closing in the distance. "Don't be so cold."
What did your mom tell you that one time? Oh yes. That if you were ever backed against a wall, then just break the damn thing down.
Too bad it's figurative. You're just about ready to sock him in the face if you didn't know he was into that sort of thing.
"I'm serious about you," He says, and it sounds so real, so genuine, nearly makes you sputter. "See? I've even bought school supplies.
He unzips his light backback and spills the contents on the table.
A lone piece of paper flies out, a lighter, and a mechanical pencil with no lead that follows straight after. There's also a pocket knife that you choose to ignore.
You're not the least bit surprised.
"First of all, how the fuck are you passing this class. Second, do you really think I'm into nerds?"
"Well, considering that you are a nerd—"
"You're making things worse."
"My bad, my bad." He rubs the back of his neck sheepishly. "But on a serious note. I'll do anything."
You cross your arms. "I'm not just another one of your conquests Childe. It's not like I have the time. There are better things to do."
"You need to relax." He says so simply, with complete disregard as to what you are trying to say.
"I am relaxed." You reply, picking up your pen to continue your work. If he's going to annoy you, then you might as well get shit done while he's at it.
You're not wasting any more time.
"When was the last time you got a full eight hours of sleep?" His voice is soft, too soft, and it's not at all like the Childe you know.
Your pen stops momentarily, but you will yourself to continue writing. The words look fumbled, but you don't care. The best thing to do is get your work done and ignore the idiot next to you.
"C'mon, Zhongli won't be back for another half an hour at least. Let's go." He kicks the bottom of your chair to urge you.
The pen shakes in your hand, and you narrow your eyes at the paper, digging holes into poor question eight. "I'm trying to work here. Let me work." You'll say anything to get him off your back.
"Fine fine fine..." He raises both hands in mock surrender. "I'll stop bothering you."
Your ears perk up at that, and you turn to him so fast he has to hold in his laugh. "Really?"
"Yeah," Childe nods along, bringing your hopes up. "If you win a bet, that is." And they're back to ocean level.
You roll your eyes. There's always a catch. That doesn't mean you're any less interested.
"What's the bet?" You ask curiously, all your focus now on him. Just as he longed for from the very start.
He flicks a thumb towards the door, leaning closer to whisper next to your ear. "We bet when Zhongli comes back."
"Are you kidding me?" You aren't bothered at all at the close proximity, mainly because you're too tired and only care about the freedom that will come with your win.
Childe, however, is a completely different story. His heart is beating a thousand times a second, but his face doesn't show it. Not one bit.
Kaeya leans in from the seat behind you two, interested in what's going on. "Ooooh secrets."
"Shut up Kaeya." Childe and you monotonously drone in sync, still having your little staring contest.
The captain of the skating team smiles, about to ask—
"No. We don't have an extra pencil. Even if we did we wouldn't give it to you." Childe finally breaks his gaze to scare off Kaeya.
Kaeya raises a smug brow, and leans back in his chair like the jerkwad he is. "Then don't let me keep you two love birds."
That's all it takes for him to earn Childe's unwavering respect and loyalty for as long as he lives.
After the two are done creating an elaborate handshake as a mark of their newfound friendship, you decide to just forget about the handout. It's not like you're getting anything done anyways.
"Anyways, back to the bet." Childe says, resting his cheek on his fist as he stares at you dreamily. You try not to break under his gaze.
"If I win, you have to go on a date with me."
"No way in hell—"
"Then I'll bother you for the rest of highschool."
Highschool is eternity. You don't want to live through an eternity of this.
"Fine." You answer, and for the first time he sees genuine fear in your face, it makes him waver slightly. Not enough for him to pity you.
"If I win..." You trail, thinking loud and clear as you ignore the excited chatter of your classmates. "I want you to pay attention to class."
"What?" He exclaims incredulously, blinking in disbelief. "I thought you'd get me to stop talking to you altogether."
"If you're paying attention in class, you don't bother me as much and your grades go up." You grin smartly, and oh archons it livens his entire day up, and it's only nine in the morning.
"You care about my grades?" Childe bites back a smile.
"Not at all." You lie, and quickly look away. Woah the floor tile looking trippy.
He decides it's better to get on with the bet without causing you any more distress. After all, you've given him such cute facial expressions today. He's feeling quite generous.
Pulling out his cracked-as-shit latest model phone, he unlocks it and tinkers with it a bit before turning the screen towards you.
"We'll be using this to time both of our predictions at the same time. Whoever has the closer time to when he finally swings by is the winner." The rules are simply put, no room for error.
You tilt your head in confusion. "Why am I seeing a slime review?"
"SHIT!" Childe fumbles with his phone, aggressively tapping on the screen. He lowers his head and voice as if he's been through fifty consecutive hits in the face. "It's uh, Teucer's account."
"Yeah...okay." Is all you can say.
"Ok what do you bet?" He changes the topic to unfuck the situation.
Putting a finger in your chin, you think for a minute, calculating the average of all the times Mr.Zhongli has left the classroom for a considerable amount of time.
"Fifteen minutes." You're sure of it. It's like clockwork every day.
"Hmm..." Childe crosses his arms, seemingly in deep thought. "Five minutes." He places his bet, and both timers start simultaneously.
Five minutes?! Is he serious?
You laugh inwardly. This challenge is in the bag.
The sense of victory you feel dulls when your ears pick up the echo of footsteps nearing the classroom.. Both your heads snap up to the doors.
There's something scary about Childe once his competitive side comes out. "Looks like I've won." He turns to you, eyes darkening evilly.
"What? There's no way in hell a ginger is right." Your palms are clammed up, eyebrows furrowed in panic. You calculated every single variable, how could this be?
You race to the front, Childe right on your tail as the entire class clamps up. The footsteps get louder, causing even whispers to become total silence.
Then it hits you. The shitty music about getting bitches and bars playing on the other side.
The door is swung open by Childe, and you're face to face with an idiot sophomore with a speaker in his pocket.
Childe’s grin is long gone, and you sigh in relief.
The false alarm encourages the class to return back to their idle chatter.
"Scaramouche?" Childe spits, narrowing his eyes at the unamused boy. "I thought it was Signora's shift today."
By "shift" he means being a complete dickwad and scamming fake weed to students in return for their souls. It only really works on the freshmen.
The only reason the club still runs is because Signora threatened the principal with some sus pictures she snapped of him and his assistant.
"Apparently she had an emergency." Scaramouche explains, lowering the volume on his outdated beats pill. "Something about a hair appointment because she got ran into by a, and I quote "lecherous imbecile.""
You steer clear of the conversation, finding the whiteboard far more fascinating and worth your while.
A loud cough is heard from behind the kid, and you're met with a crestfallen look on your beloved teacher's face.
You go through a whiplash of emotions, becoming completely numb towards your loss.
"They were out of slow cooked bamboo shoot soup." He sighs, handing a stack of papers to Childe, who is wearing the fattest smirk on his face at his victory. "Please hand these out to your classmates Childe, and we will begin shortly."
You check down at the timer despite knowing who’s won. Five minutes and twenty five seconds. Somehow, you don't feel as dejected as you thought you'd feel.
Maybe the date will be fun. Maybe Childe isn't so bad. Maybe...you do have time to indulge in these sort of things. If he’s so hell bent on getting your attention, perhaps it’s possible that you can make some room in your heart for him.
However, all those thoughts fly out the window when Childe hands you the new worksheet.
“I hope you're ready for our date tomorrow. We'll be sparring till sundown, and after you’ll be feeding me with chopsticks." He winks, and it makes your heart flip even though all you want right now is to go to the bathroom and barf your guts out.
Feelings are complicated.
You smile back at him nauseously, tight lipped and all, then you pull out your phone, go on maps, and search for the closest cliffs to jump off of.
After he's done, Childe slouches back in his original seat with a different kind of enthusiasm, and opens up his messages. He texts Zhongli a "thank you <3".
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puppywritings · 4 years
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fidelium - johnny suh x gender-neutral reader masterlist
⇢   synopsis: you can’t wait to spend the weekend at johnny’s house. your boyfriend was a bad boy, and a motorcycle rider to boot. things were new, thrilling. perhaps more thrilling than you bargained for. you come to learn that it’s a lot more difficult to leave than to stay.
⇢   word count: 6.8k ⇢   trigger warnings: death, guns, toxic relationship involving manipulation, objectification, arguments. sexual elements and implied sex but no explicit scenes. ⇢   warning:  the relationship displayed in this fic is in absolutely no way healthy or ideal. it’s one red flag after another. if somebody disrespects your boundaries, threatens you, objectifies you, manipulates you, or anything of the sort, they’re not a good person to be around and they don’t deserve to stay in your life. the contents of this fic may be upsetting to read.
⇢   a/n: this is my piece for @du0tine​‘s 21 ways to kill your lover collab. intended for 18+ audiences. i also want to say, it’s not my intention to romanticize or glorify toxic, harmful, or abusive relationships - this is purely fiction. this writing also doesn’t reflect the real johnny suh, who i’m sure is a lovely person and would never engage in this sort of behaviour.
taglist: @prettyjaems @ethaeriyeol​ @1-800-seo​ @neonun-au​ (sorry if i forgot anyone i’m super disorganised w my taglists atm)
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Johnny Suh didn’t fit your usual dating criteria. With his black leather jacket, heavy lace-up boots, and hulking motorcycle, he was a bit of a bad boy. And there was something exciting in that. You’d met him late one night, in the bar where you worked. You’d served him all night - rum and coke, his drink of choice. He certainly caught your eye, at first. He was handsome, with his brown eyes twinkling and his long blond hair pulled back into a ponytail. But it wasn’t until the two of you started talking that you became interested. It was a quiet night, and Johnny insisted on sitting at the bar in front of you. He was teasing, charming. And when he gave you his number at closing time, you actually tapped the digits into your phone, rather than just discarding it like you usually do. Unlike the rest of your patrons who thrust their contact details upon you, when it came to Johnny the interest was mutual.
So, while it was true that Johnny wasn’t quite the typical man you went after, the relationship had been going well. He’d been nothing short of a gentleman in the duration of your relationship, though he still thrilled you with his affinity for the more reckless things in life; late-night motorcycle rides, drinking just a little too much and partying all night. He took the mundaneness out of your life - he made your life an adventure.
Towards the end of your shift that Friday evening, you found yourself getting jittery; you checked the time every five minutes, and a swarm of butterflies was building in your stomach. Johnny was picking you up after work on his bike, and it was all you could think about. You almost ran out of the establishment, when the clock struck ten, marking the end of your shift. Your heart swelled at the sight of Johnny in the bar’s parking lot, leaning against his motorcycle with his hands in his pockets.
“Hey, angel,” he greeted you, affection glowing in his eyes and his smile.
“Hi,” you beamed, wrapping your arms around his waist and taking in his warmth. He picked you up immediately, holding you tight and spinning you. “Johnny!” you giggled, fingers grasping the cotton of his white t-shirt. 
“You ready to meet my boys?” he asked you, punctuating his question with a kiss on your nose. He was referring to the friends he considered family; he lived with them, in a rather large house on the outskirts of town, from what you’d heard. They were special to him, and you knew it was important to him that you got along with them. You’d be lying if you said you weren’t completely terrified. You knew it’d be okay, though. If they had Johnny’s approval you were sure they’d be good people. Plus, you could never be too scared with Johnny’s hand in your own.
“Ready as I’ll ever be,” you responded with a smile.
“Hop on,” he instructed you, tossing you a helmet and putting on his own. At the beginning of your relationship, he’d given you his own helmet, forgoing his protection for the sake of yours. You hadn’t liked this - this display of his reckless attitude that surpassed thrilling and sat nicely in the territory of dangerous - and so you’d pestered him until he bought a second helmet.
You secured your rucksack on your back, prepacked with all the clothes and toiletries you required for the weekend you’d be spending with your boyfriend, before climbing onto the large black bike behind him. Johnny had been driving you around on his bike for a number of weeks now, but you still weren’t quite used to it. The mix of fear and exhilaration, both from the wind whipping past your ears and from the sensation of your chest pressed flush against Johnny’s back, your arms tight around his waist. It made your heart race. The feeling you got from riding a motorcycle embodied everything that Johnny was: dark, exciting, intoxicating, addictive.
Johnny hadn’t been lying when he said he lived on the outskirts. The bright lights of the town centre were far behind you, and even the streetlights had begun to die out. You were alone with the moon and starlight now. The neatly paved roads gave way to rough muddy lanes. The built-up urban surroundings gave way to empty fields, then to a dense and seemingly endless forest. The bike’s headlamp shone a path through the trees, guiding Johnny to his home. Though your partner clearly felt familiar here, the environment sent chills down your spine - you could’ve sworn you felt eyes on you, peering out from the darkness. When your journey ended, at a solitary house looming tall against the dark backdrop of the forest, you were thankful.
“Here we are,” Johnny welcomed you, helping you off the bike. The house was bigger than you could’ve expected. The term mansion wouldn’t be amiss.
“So,” you commented, looking up at the structure, illustrated by the silver moonlight. “This is where you and your biker gang live?” You looked along the line of bikes, queued up around the house. They were of different styles and sizes, though (with your limited knowledge on motorcycles) they all looked rather impressive.
“I keep telling you, we’re not a biker gang,” Johnny corrected you, with a lighthearted roll of his eyes. “We’re just a group of friends who live together, and just so happen to ride together too.”
“And if that’s not a biker gang, what is?” you teased.
“Zip it,” Johnny said gently, and you complied. “Here, I’ll take your bag.”
“Ever the gentleman,” you commented, passing it to him. You braced yourself, as he led you into his home.
It was warm inside, much warmer than out in the chilly woodland. From what you could tell by looking at the entranceway, the place was tidy and well-lit. Your boyfriend led you down the hall, into an open-plan kitchen and living area, where Johnny's friends were sitting around the television. 
"We're home, guys," Johnny announced, drawing their attention towards you.
"Hey, look what Johnny brought home!" one of them called out, bringing a blush to your cheeks.
"Watch it," Johnny warned, wrapping his arm around your waist and pulling you close to him. "Y/N is all mine. You can look, but you can't touch. In fact, you can only look for five seconds at a time."
“These are the boys” Johnny introduced you to them. “This is Jaehyun, Ten, Mark. And that’s Donghyuck. My protege, right kid?” 
“That’s right, John” the boy grinned up at Johnny from where he was sitting.
You gave a shy wave as you looked around at Johnny's friends. Though he had named them all, introducing them, it was a redundant act. You'd asked to see pictures of everybody prior to that night, not wanting to get lost amid a sea of unfamiliar faces. You saw Jaehyun, with his dimples and broad shoulders; Mark, with pronounced cheekbones and a delicate nose; Ten, with a feline-like beauty; and Donghyuck, full cheeks and long eyelashes. 
"I think we're just gonna turn in for the night, right Y/N?" Johnny spoke, looking down at you. "See you boys tomorrow."
You waved at Johnny's friends, with a polite, "Bye." The boys chorused their goodbyes back at you, and Johnny led you away.
You couldn't help but admire the house as Johnny guided you to his bedroom, your hand in his. The place was huge, grand. You weren't sure under what circumstances Johnny and his friends acquired this house, but it can't have been cheap. 
"And this," he led you inside, "Is my room."
The room was a fair size, with several tall windows and a four-poster double bed. The matching furniture looked sturdy and high-quality, a dark antique wood.
"This is impressive," you told him honestly. Johnny beamed in pride; he was always looking for praise, and you were happy to feed his ego.
Johnny lounged on his bed, laying back propped up on his elbows. "Come feel how comfy my bed is," he invited you with a smirk.
"Johnny Suh, you are not smooth. I know that's just an excuse to get me into bed," you said, falling beside him.
"If you knew it was just an excuse," Johnny asked, pausing to plant a kiss on your jawline, "Then why'd you join me?"
"Because," you tell him, "Maybe I want to be in bed with you."
Johnny gave a low chuckle, before kissing you again; a line beginning at your jaw, trailing down to your neck, and ending at your collarbone, making you gasp and lean into his touch.
"Johnny," you purred, your voice full of want.
"Let Johnny take care of you, baby," Johnny hummed. You obliged, submitting to his touch and surrendering to the pleasure.
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Coming down from your high, you collapsed against Johnny’s bed, smiling as you looked up at your boyfriend who lay beside you.
“You’re perfect,” Johnny told you, his dark brown eyes gazing deeply into your own. You felt the heat rise to your cheeks, and you looked away, only for Johnny to tilt your chin back up towards him. “It’s true,” he reiterated.
“I’m not perfect,” you denied, wrinkling your nose.
Johnny pecked your lips. “You are. My angel.”
You looked at him, lying beside you in his bed. His sex hair was immaculate, perfectly tousled from rolling around and from your fingers tugging on it. His lips were plump and pink from your kisses, and his collarbones were decorated in pink splotches. He looked beautiful, he was glowing, and you couldn’t help but grin at him.
“Hey,” Johnny says suddenly, sitting up and untangling himself from the blankets. “Let me give you a massage.”
“It’s okay, babe, you don’t have to,” you waved away his offer. He seemed deadset, however, cracking his knuckles in preparation.
“I insist. Roll over.” You obeyed, lying on your front and allowing your boyfriend to straddle your waist. His hands pressed into your skin, rubbing deeply into your muscles. The sensation was pleasant, you had to admit. Mostly, you just enjoyed the proximity between you and Johnny, and the feeling of being taken care of by someone you loved. You closed your eyes, allowing yourself to slip away and ease into the feeling.
You weren’t allowed to slip away for long, however, as your phone began to buzz, startling you. The vibrations against the hardwood of Johnny’s bedside table conjured a harsh screeching noise. You lifted your head, peering at the screen.
You lifted your torso, as much as you could with Johnny’s weight on you. “Oh, it’s my mom. I should-”
“You can call her back later, angel,” Johnny said, pushing you back down onto the bed. The action was gentle, but Johnny didn’t need to use much force to manipulate your body; your boyfriend worked out, and bordered on freakishly strong - at least, in comparison to you. His buff arms held your shoulders down, preventing any movement. "This is my time to pamper you," he explained, resuming the massage.
"Okay," you tentatively agreed. "I'll call her back later." You got the sense that this massage was much more for Johnny's benefit than for yours, but if it kept him happy, then so be it.
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“Good morning, angel,” Johnny greeted you. Your eyelids fluttered open, adjusting to the light in his bedroom. With a groan, you stretched your muscles, stiff from sleeping. “I brought you a cup of coffee.”
You looked to your boyfriend, smiling at you as he entered the room, a mug in each hand. You couldn’t be sure how long he’d been awake, or what time it was, but he was dressed already, beige cable-knit sweater and loose jeans, with his hair pulled back in a low ponytail. It was a contrast to his usual greaser bad-boy image, and the sight warmed your heart. He looked cozy, soft. You smiled back at him, sitting up and letting the covers pool around your waist. 
“Morning, Johnny,” you beamed at him, accepting the cup of coffee he handed to you. You took a sip and moaned in delight. Your boyfriend made a mean cup of coffee, perfectly sweet without being overbearing. He sat beside you on the bed, caressing your cheek lightly.
“I was thinking we could go out for a walk,” he suggested, before taking a swig of his own coffee. “It’s a nice morning.”
You nodded. “Okay.”
A while later, fully dressed and hand-in-hand with Johnny, you found yourself venturing through the forest that surrounded the house. There were a few man-made footpaths winding between the trees, but for the most part, you were truly in the middle of nature, an environment completely untouched by humans. Birds flapped their wings, rustling in the trees, and creatures whose species were unknown to you scrambled to run away in your wake, paws pounding on the forest floor. Johnny had been right; it was a nice morning. The sun filtered through branches and leaves, casting light and warmth down upon you, and the air was clean and fresh.
“It’s so nice out here,” you commented, looking around at the greens and browns that encompassed you.
“Yeah,” Johnny agreed. “I’m lucky to live here.”
“You really are. I’d walk through here every morning if I were you.”
“You’re lucky, too,” Johnny acknowledged, squeezing your hand. “You’re dating me. You can walk here whenever you want as well.” You smiled, your heart swelling at his words.
“It really is isolated, huh? Your house?” you remarked, peering around at your surroundings. The nearest road was so far away that you couldn’t even hear the rush of cars from where you stood.
“Yeah,” Johnny confirmed. “It’s not easy to get out of the house.” Why anyone would wish to escape this peaceful surroundings, you had no idea. It felt so far removed from the hustle and bustle of everyday life; your usual troubles felt so distant.
The sun had risen higher in the sky by the time you returned to Johnny’s house, and you realised you hadn’t even brought your phone with you. You hadn’t even thought to check the time once since you woke up. This was so out of the ordinary for you, particularly on a Saturday morning, when you’d usually be lounging in your apartment scrolling through social media.
The house had woken up by the time you stepped through the front door. It had been silent when you left, though now it seemed that the entire household was up and about.
“Where have you been, John?” Ten called out, as the two of you entered the kitchen.
“Just out for a walk,” he explained, taking a seat at the kitchen island, where you joined him.
“By the way, Y/N, it’s nice to meet you,” Ten greeted you, smiling sweetly.
“It’s nice to meet you, too,” you returned, smiling back politely.
Johnny leaned in close, stage-whispering. “It’s really not all that nice to meet him. He’s a pretty lousy guy. Into some real weird stuff. Has probably killed a guy.” Ten gave Johnny a pointed glare as he departed the kitchen, and you giggled at your boyfriend’s antics.
“So,” Donghyuck asked, his voice somewhat muffled as he peered into the open fridge. “What do you guys have planned today?”
“Hmm. Not much,” Johnny answered. “Have some lunch, take it easy.”
“I want to shower first,” you announced, stretching your arms above your head. The physical exertion of your outdoor walk, along with your heated activities the night before, had left you feeling a little less than squeaky clean.
“We should do that together,” Johnny suggested, pressing a lingering kiss to your cheek, which flamed at his proposition. 
“Okay,” you giggled in spite of yourself. Johnny was the only man, since you’d been twelve years of age, who was capable of reducing you to such a blushing, giggling mess.
“Let’s go,” Johnny invited you, smirking as he stood up and held out his hand. You took it, and laughed when Donghyuck fake gagged and Johnny stared at him with daggers in his eyes. You allowed Johnny to lead you, your hand in his, all the way upstairs. After retrieving your toiletries and change of clothes, you joined him in the bathroom, closing the door behind you.
“The lock is funny,” he told you, leaning over you to fiddle with it. “You really have to twist it-” he grunted, “There we go.”
You smiled, bunching up his shirt in your hands and pulling him closer towards you. He looked smug as he leaned in to kiss you, his lips sweet and commanding. Your hands went under his shirt, ghosting over his chiseled abdomen, which tensed delightfully under your touch.
Johnny pulled away, his eyes scanning up and down your body, setting you alight with his gaze. “Why don’t you doll yourself up for lunch, huh? I want to show everyone how beautiful you are.”
“Okay,” you nodded, agreeing to his suggestion. He captured your lips again, and you smiled against his lips. “We need to shower, baby. And no funny business.”
“No promises,” Johnny grinned, his eyes twinkling. When he took his shirt off, however, your request of no funny business went completely out the window.
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Sunday morning came all too fast, as your weekend with Johnny came to a close. It had been peaceful, relaxing, a greatly needed recharge, and you weren’t quite ready to return to your regular life. Walks through the city rather than through the woodland, and shifts in the bar all week long.
"I wish you didn't have to leave today," Johnny said, pouting as his fingertip traced shapes along your forearm as you lounged on his bed together.
"I know, babe, me too," you agreed. His eyelashes looked long, fanned across his cheeks as he gazed downwards.
"You should stay," Johnny suggested, a hopeful lilt to his voice. "Just another day or two?"
You shook your head at him. "I'm working all week babe, it's easier if I just go home. I can stay again next weekend." 
Johnny sighs, an irritated huff, retracting his hand from your arm. "You don't wanna stay with me?" he asked, looking up at you with hurt in his eyes.
"It's not that I don't want to, John, it'll just be complicated. You'll have to give me a lift to work, and it's so far that I'll have to wake up a lot earlier."
"You don't even sound like you're going to miss me," he pointed out. His voice had a tinge of anger and it frustrated you in turn. He was acting so petty - you hadn't seen this immature side of him before.
"Of course I'll miss you, Johnny," you assured him with a roll of your eyes. "But we can see each other next weekend, okay?"
"Whatever," Johnny scoffed.
"Whatever?" you asked incredulously. "Johnny, you're acting like a child."
"Sorry. Sorry I'm going to miss my partner because they insist on leaving me." 
You shifted away from Johnny, swinging your legs off the bed and facing away from him. "This is stupid," you muttered.
"I'm stupid?" Johnny exclaimed.
You rubbed your eyes in frustration. "I didn't say that."
"You didn't need to." Johnny jumped up from the bed, swiftly storming past you and exiting the room, complete with exaggerated stomps and a hefty slam of the door.
“God!” you cussed, in irritation and disbelief. You couldn’t believe he was acting like this. This side of Johnny, bitter and bad-tempered - you couldn’t say you enjoyed it. If anything, his outburst had only made you want to leave more. You cursed the complete and utter isolation of the place. You could hardly leave and catch a bus - you’d get lost if you even tried venturing out into the woods. Johnny was your ride home, and you didn’t want to face him. You weren’t even sure if he’d oblige, if you asked him to take you home.
You stood, scanning through your options, and your feet led you out of Johnny’s room. Down the hall, to the room you were sure belonged to Donghyuck. You knocked on the door, two uncertain taps. 
“Yeah?” Donghyuck’s voice called out from within - bingo. You pushed the door open apprehensively. The room was smaller than Johnny’s, though still a decent size. He had a large television mounted on the wall, hooked up to a gaming system that looked rather impressive, to your amateur perspective. 
“Oh, Y/N,” he remarked, sounding surprised and pausing his video game. “What’s up?”
“I’m sorry to bother you,” you prefaced, stepping into his room and closing the door behind you. “Johnny and I… had a bit of an argument. I was wondering if you could give me a ride home?”
“You fought?” Donghyuck asked. “What about?”
You sighed “It’s nothing. Something silly.” You didn’t particularly want to divulge the details to Donghyuck - you didn’t want to end up badmouthing Johnny to his friends. 
“Hey, sit down,” he invites you, patting the space beside him, on the end of his bed. “Come play video games with me. Take a minute to calm down.” You hesitantly joined him, taking a seat on the end of his bed. “Think this through, Y/N, it’s probably not a good idea to storm out.”
You picked up the controller Donghyuck gave you, holding it loosely. “Yeah, you’re probably right. Johnny wouldn’t be happy if I left without saying anything.”
“That guy has a temper,” Donghyuck commented under his voice. You felt inclined to agree, after the way he’d acted that morning.
“How do I play?” you asked, examining the controller in your hands. Donghyuck leaned over, running you through the controls and rules of the game. The other boy pressed play, and you were flung into the game headfirst, forced to learn and adapt to the fast-paced course of the game. You didn’t know how much time passed, but by your fourth round of the game, you were laughing and shouting along with Donghyuck, all thoughts of smothering boyfriends erased from your mind.
“Feeling better, huh?” Donghyuck asked, beaming at you. 
“Yeah,” you confirmed, nodding. “Thanks.”
“One more round?”
“I should probably go talk to Johnny,” you denied apologetically. “But thank you.”
“Any time,” he smiled, holding out his fist for a bump, which you obliged. 
“Bye,” you bid him, before departing his bedroom and moving down the hall. You stood for a moment, outside Johnny’s bedroom door, taking a deep breath and bracing yourself.
When you pushed open the door, you found Johnny already standing in his room. You approached him slowly and with apprehension, speaking in a calm and gentle tone. “Hey, Johnny? I’m sorry for blowing up earlier.”
“It’s okay,” he assured you. His composure surprised you, after the volume of his outburst earlier. He didn’t look at you, nor did he turn around to face you. He stood before his dresser, apparently very focused on something inside it. “Why were you in Donghyuck’s room?”
Your eyes widened a little. He didn’t sound mad, nor did he have the right to be. But something about the situation, or perhaps about his demeanor, made you feel a little jittery. You didn’t know he’d been watching you. “Oh. Um. He was just convincing me to stay.” You cleared your throat, feeling the need to change the subject. “What are you doing?”
“Come look,” he beckoned you. You joined him, peering down into the dresser which he seemed so enthralled by.
You gulped. The open drawer was like something you’d find in a museum; it was lined with crimson velvet, and several vintage-looking pistols were laid out in it. They ranged in size and style, the smallest being the size of your palm and the largest stretching to the length of your forearm. “I… I didn’t know you had guns.” The sight of them made your heart race. If you were being honest, you’d led a rather sheltered life, and had never been in the presence of so many weapons. It made you feel uneasy.
“I don’t use them. They’re only collectibles.” Johnny picked up the smallest gun, and you flinched. He glanced at you, and the look in his eyes was undetectable to you - it wasn’t offence, nor regret, but his eyes definitely glinted with something. The way he handled the gun, you weren’t sure if you bought the ‘collectibles’ line. He handled it with such ease and grace, that it almost seemed like he was born with a gun in his hand. Though it was small, compact, barely the size of your hand - and it appeared even smaller in Johnny’s palm, which dwarfed it - you found yourself stunned and shivery, thinking about the damage it was capable of. Did Johnny collect bullets, too? you found yourself wondering.
You averted your gaze, discomfort taking over, and noticed that your phone lay atop the dresser. Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion. You weren’t sure where, exactly, you had left your phone, but you were certain you hadn’t laid it there. “Hey - my phone-”
“Oh, right,” Johnny said, placing his gun back in the drawer and closing it sharply, twisting a key which sat in the keyhole, locking it away. “Your boss called. He said you don’t have to work tomorrow. That’s great, right? You can stay the night - you don’t have to leave.”
You nodded, feeling a little sick but faking a smile anyways. “Great.” You were tired, physically and emotionally. You felt bad for even thinking it, but you wanted a break from your boyfriend. You wanted some space. He was making you feel uncomfortable, bordering on unsafe, and you found yourself craving the security you felt in Donghyuck’s room.
“Um, I’m gonna take a shower,” you conjured the excuse for an escape. 
“Okay,” Johnny accepted it easily, smiling widely. He wrapped his arms around your waist, planting a kiss on your forehead. “Don’t be gone too long, alright?”
“Alright,” you nodded, breathing a sigh of relief when he released you. You would stay another night; it wasn’t worth upsetting Johnny over.
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You had to admit that you felt a lot better after showering. The warm water had relaxed you, along with the familiar and comforting scent of your shampoo grounding you and bringing your emotions to a calmer, neutral level. You were standing before the bathroom mirror, applying moisturiser to your face, when you heard a click. A turn.
The broken lock.
Before you could act, Donghyuck was before you, staring at you with wide eyes. You let out a yelp, turning around, though most of your skin was hidden beneath your towel.
“Fuck, sorry! I’m so sorry! Don’t tell Johnny about this!” he blurted.
“It’s okay,” you responded, cheeks flushed. You weren’t sure Donghyuck had heard your forgiveness, however; you’d heard him dash away while your back was turned. You laugh awkwardly to yourself at the mishap, before closing the door again and making certain to twist the lock properly. It had only been a silly mistake, you reassured yourself. And he hadn’t seen anything, besides your bare shoulders, which was hardly a great reveal.
You shook your head, before drying and dressing yourself. The poor boy had been so flustered, and you had to admit it was sort of endearing.
“Nice shower?” Johnny asked when you returned to his room, lying on his bed atop the covers.
You nodded, joining him on the bed. “I feel so relaxed now.”
He pulled you close to him, kissing your lips gently. “Jaehyun’s making dinner for everyone, it’ll be ready before long.”
“That’s nice of him,” you murmured, laying your head on Johnny’s shoulder. “Poor Donghyuck, though. We had a really awkward moment in the bathroom, I don’t know if he’ll be ready to face me.”
You felt Johnny tense, his muscles going hard beneath you. “What do you mean?”
“He walked in on me showering. I don’t think he saw much, but-”
Johnny sat up abruptly, causing your head to fall back on the bed. “He fucking what?” Johnny hissed.
“Johnny, it’s fine,” you insisted. “I was wrapped in a towel-”
“I’m going to fucking kill him,” Johnny cursed, standing.
“Johnny,” you spoke firmly, grabbing his arm in a tight grip. “Stop. I said he didn’t see anything.”
“I fucking hope not,” Johnny growled, sitting down once more. He tucked a lock of hair behind your ear, stroking your face lightly. His hand was trembling. “You’re my angel,” he said. “I don’t want anybody else seeing you like that.”
“It won’t happen again, okay? I’m all yours, I promise.” You placed your hand on top of Johnny’s, soothing him with your touch. His temper, flaring again. This wasn’t something you liked much about Johnny, and you hadn’t been all that glad to meet this side of him. But, you bargained, nobody was perfect - you certainly weren’t. Besides, you had been ready this time; your firm tone and gentle touch had helped to calm him.
Johnny stood up, rubbing his face with both of his hands. You heard him release a shaky breath.
“Please calm down, Johnny. I’m sorry.”
“I’m fine,” he said, nodding certainly. “I’m calm.”
“Let’s go get dinner, yeah?” You stood, intertwining your fingers with his.
“Yeah,” he agreed, squeezing your hand a little too tightly.
Johnny’s rather sour mood remained all throughout dinner, as evidenced by his clenched jaw and the protective hand he laid on your thigh. His sullen demeanor made him somewhat of a bore to be around, and you found yourself laughing and joking with his friends; you’d be happy to consider Donghyuck a friend, and Mark was hilarious too. Johnny didn’t seem to like this, however. You spent the last portion of the meal in silence, quietly eating and staying close to Johnny’s side.
Even afterwards, as you watched a movie with the group, Johnny refused to relax and let go of his needless worries. Everybody was laughing at the movie, but you couldn’t help but notice that Johnny hadn’t even cracked a smile the whole time. In fact, you didn’t even think he’d been watching the movie; his eyes hardly left you, flitting between your face and your body. As though if he stopped watching you, something horrible would happen. As though he were keeping guard.
He pulled you closer towards him, though there was very little space between the two of you on the couch beforehand. His lips connected with your cheek, before straying down towards your neck. You felt your skin heat up in embarrassment, although all eyes in the room were still trained on the television. Johnny wrapped his arm around your waist, using his strength to lift you onto his lap. You squeaked at the sudden action, earning inquisitive glances from Johnny’s friends, which only fuelled how flustered you were. He held your body close to his, squeezing you. His breath tickled your neck, sending shivers down your spine, before he sunk his teeth into your skin. You hoped your muffled moan went unnoticed, but your eyes were shut tightly so it was unknown to you. You squirmed in Johnny’s lap, thighs clenching together tightly.
In another show of Johnny’s strength, or perhaps just his relative power in comparison to your apparent weakness, he lifted you swiftly. The abrupt movement surprised you, and you gasped sharply.
“Y/N and I are going upstairs,” Johnny announced to the group, and you silently allowed him to guide you away.
“Because,” he continued as you two left the room, “I can take Y/N any time I want.”
“Johnny!” you scolded him, mouth agape with humiliation as his boys hollered in your wake. He ignored your cries of reprimand, scooping you up off your feet with a grin on his face. 
“C’mon, baby,” he whispered, carrying you away to his bedroom. You sighed in fond exasperation, laying your head against his chest. You condemned his announcement of “I can take Y/N any time I want,” but the fact remained true that he could certainly take you then.
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Monday morning. You were growing terribly bored of this big, old house in the middle of nowhere. Spending time with Johnny was nice, when he wasn’t baring his angry possessive side. Although you really liked him, you found yourself wanting some space. And so, when you woke up before Johnny, you left his sleeping form behind, pulled one of his oversized sweaters over your head, and set out to explore the enormous house that had become your confinement.
Nobody else was awake, or so it seemed when you ventured downstairs and poured yourself a glass of juice. You felt itchy, agitated. Even when you settled on the couch, the sense of calm you desired simply refused to fall over you. With an agitated sigh, you advanced throughout the house, exploring the ground floor. You had learned that all the bedrooms were on the first floor, and so you’d been wondering where one specific door led. Off the left of the hallway, aside from the kitchen and living area, and the ground floor bathroom.
The door creaked as you pushed it open, as did the floorboards when you stepped through the threshold. The room was dark, though you identified the furnishings of a study when you squinted your eyes. You moved to the far side of the room, drawing open the heavy red curtains thereby illuminating the space and releasing a cloud of dust at the same time. You waved the cloud away, choking.
There was a sturdy desk, littered with boxes full of clutter, accompanied by a rickety chair that looked like it would fall apart if you put any weight on it. You gasped a silent “wow” as you took in the wall opposite the door, lined with shelves that stretched from floor to ceiling, crammed to the brim with books of every size. You approached the extensive library, examining the titles. You didn’t recognise anything, apart from a few classics, but it was still an impressive collection. You began to wonder whether one of the boys had inherited the property from an older relative - none of them seemed particularly studious or academic, at least not enough to warrant an assortment of books this great. You trailed a finger along the spines, accumulating yet more dust. The books, much like the room in its entirety, had sat untouched for a long time.
“Boo!”
You shrieked, spinning around with your arms raised in defence, only to sigh in relief and clutch your heart. “Donghyuck! You scared me!”
The boy bent in half, in stitches at the fear he’d instilled in you. “I’m sorry! I couldn’t resist!” You couldn’t help but join in with his laughter; it was just so infectious. Even minutes later, you were cackling while wiping tears away from your eyes.
“So,” Donghyuck spoke, as his laughter died down. “What are you doing in here?”
“I don’t know,” you shrugged, still smiling. “Just exploring, I guess.”
“I don’t think there’s anything interesting in here,” Donghyuck claimed, looking around at the books.
“Really? It seems like hidden treasure to me.” You peered upwards, at the higher shelves, before standing on your tiptoes and stretching upwards, reaching for an eye-catching book with a golden spine.
“Careful,” Donghyuck murmured, placing a hand on the small of your back to steady you as you strained.
You heard Johnny’s growl, a split second before he entered your field of vision, entering the study and shoving Donghyuck away from you.
“Johnny!” you cried, feeling helpless and out of control as he squared up to the younger man.
Donghyuck had his hands raised in surrender, looking at his friend with concern tainting his expression. “Hey, man, calm down,” he attempted to pacify Johnny.
“Stay away from Y/N,” Johnny yelled, right in Donghyuck’s face
You leapt into action, maneuvering your way in between the pair, palm flat on Johnny’s chest. “Johnny, look at me,” you commanded him firmly. There was a fire in his eyes that you didn’t recognise. It flamed, bright and angry, threatening to burn anything and everything in its path. It scared you, and you resisted strongly against the urge to cower before him.
“Come on, Y/N,” he bit, gripping your forearm tightly. Potentially tight enough to bruise.
“Come on where?” you asked, stumbling as you struggled to keep up. He tugged you out of the room and down the hall, as you tried not to trip over your own feet.
“We’re going for a walk. Put your shoes on,” he demanded, arms crossed, waiting for you to obey.
“I- Johnny- What?” you sputtered. “Can I at least go upstairs and get my coat?”
“No,” he denied flatly. You rolled your eyes, slipping into your shoes. Wasting no time, Johnny pulled you out of the house, slamming the door behind you. You followed after him, your heart pounding with a mixture of uncertainty, anxiety, and speechless anger, as he marched you out into the woods, only stopping when you reached a clearing a good distance away from the house.
“Something’s going on between you and Donghyuck,” Johnny stated with hard certainty, as though it were fact. His face was flushed red, veins prominent along his forehead. He looked at you expectantly, but you had no idea what he wanted in response.
You sighed, rubbing your eyes tiredly. You couldn’t help but yell at him. “Johnny, what are you talking about? You’re my boyfriend. I like you. But not when you act like this, Jesus Christ!”
Johnny advanced, closing the gap between you, and you flinched when he regained his grip on your arm. “You need to stay the fuck away from Donghyuck, okay?”
“This is such a huge overreaction!” You tried to struggle away from his grip, but he was far too strong, his will iron.
Johnny leaned in, impossibly even closer to your face. “I brought you here, as my baby, to show you off to all my friends,” he hissed. “And you let them get their grubby little hands on you? I thought better of you, Y/N. I thought you were fucking faithful.”
Your heart raced, pounding wildly with how badly you wanted to get away from him. You didn’t think you could forgive him for this outburst. You just wanted to leave. “You’re fucking insane,” you shouted at him.
Johnny looked disgusted at your words. “Don’t talk to me like that.”
“Me?” you asked incredulously, finally shrugging out of his grasp. “Me, don’t talk to you like that? Listen, Johnny, I’m not your shiny little toy you can show off to your friends. I’m a human being. And you have no right telling me who I can and can’t talk to.”
“Come here.” Johnny was looking at you, his mouth a straight line, his eyes cold.
“Why?”
“Come here,” he repeated, and you hesitantly took a step forward, afraid to disobey him when he spoke in such an angry, demanding voice. Johnny reached out, gripping you by the arm before spinning you round quickly, pulling you close to him. Your chest was pressed tightly against his back, his arm across your chest, locking you in place. You could feel his heavy, ragged breathing.
“I’m not happy, Y/N,” he jeered, whispering into your ear harshly. “You’re my angel, and you’ve upset me. Maybe you aren’t such an angel after all.” You thrashed, but his grasp on you only tightened. “You’re not going anywhere.”
“Johnny, please,” you begged, your voice nothing but a hoarse whimper.
“Let me talk,” he hissed at you. “You’ve hurt me. And I need to show you - I need to hurt you back.”
“What are you- let me go!” You continued to flail in his hold, kicking out your feet but failing to do any real damage to him.
“Shh, it’ll only last a second,” he hushed you, his lips touching your ear and sending shivers down your spine. You felt him fumble behind you, and found an opportunity for escape, but it was no use. His grip on you was iron-tight, unrelenting. Johnny jabbed you in the chest, slightly to the left of your sternum, directly over your banging heart. You looked down, choking on a sob. 
One of Johnny’s pistols, the so-called collectible item, was pressing into your skin.
“Right in the heart, Y/N. That’s where you hurt me.” 
“Johnny, please!” you cried, struggling in vain. Tears blurred your vision, and spit flew from your mouth as you pleaded with him. “Let me go, Johnny, I’m sorry!”
“Goodnight, angel.”
You heard the gunshot before you felt it. In fact, you hardly even felt it at all. There was a bang, your ears rang, and then nothing. You collapsed, falling limp in Johnny’s arms. His angel.
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26. Mirio Togata
          Theme: Incubus
          Kinks: Wet dreams, somnophilia, non-con, rough sex, breeding
Yeah. I don’t know how male orgasms work, so this will probably be inaccurate. I’m not that big into actually having sex and I’m not in a comfortable level with my male friends how orgasms feel for them. I don’t know what else to tell you.
Very OC Mirio. And you know what else? He’s canonically 18.
Masterlist
Spread your legs for me.
This was a dream and a damned good one at that. Laying on top of you was a young man, ripped like a Greek god. He ordered you around with a honeyed voice. It worked like magic. You opened your legs and allowed him to slip between them. His large, protruding member grazed against your slit before parting your wet folds as powerful-looking hands stood on either side of your head. You stared up from your pillow and into the ocean-blue eyes leering at your body. He snagged your lower lip between his teeth and sucked. 
Your eyes snapped back to the blue ones staring at you. You licked your lips. Your mouth was parched; you couldn't speak. 
You dared to look down at the body shifting between your legs. You gaped at the small bulge in your lower belly, where the cock was fully seated inside of you. Hips snapped into you, making you arch your back of your mattress.
You feel good, don't you, sunshine?
Don't you worry. Let me take care of everything.
Your legs trembled the next morning. It was worse between your legs, and the muscles of your inner thighs ached with every step. Your lower back screamed at you. When you looked at yourself in the bathroom mirror, you hardly recognized your own reflection. You were pale with dark circles under your eyes. You struggled to remember what time you went to bed. Your mind was running on two brain cells as you tried to work out what happened the night before. You remembered going to bed, but after that, you couldn't remember anything at all. Dreams weren't supposed to be remembered, yet it felt like you had one. In the back of your mind, you saw a man, a handsome man, sharing your bed. He was…inside you. His cock was pounding your insides like nothing else mattered to him except make you come hard. But you couldn't remember if he succeeded. 
You scrubbed yourself clean in the shower and ventured back to your bed. Carefully, you peeled back the covers. Sure enough, there was a wet stain. You quickly tore the sheets off your mattress and dumped them in the hamper. No one was going to see, but you felt better with a clean set. 
At work, people were already noticing the difference. 
"Hey, Y/N, are you okay?" Momo asked. 
"Hm?" Was all that you could manage. 
"You look like you pulled an all-nighter. Late-night project?" 
You shook your head. "No, just had a bizarre dream."
You flitted away before Momo could see the faint blush coming over your cheeks. You fueled yourself with coffee all day in an attempt to stay awake. A knock at your office had you snapping upright in your chair and spinning around to face the door. Mr. Toshinori stood in your doorway.
"L/N, do you have a second?"
You tried not to rub sleep from your eyes. 
"Sure, what do you need?"
"I'd like to introduce a new colleague to you. He just transferred from a different branch, so I'm showing him around. Togata, this is L/N-san."
You couldn't tell if blood drained from your face or sped towards your face. The other man in your office doorway looked uncomfortably familiar. He was broad as he was tall with a mop of blonde hair. His ocean-blue eyes beamed when he saw you.
"It's a pleasure to meet you, L/N," said Togata. "I'm Mirio. Mirio Togata."
You slowly rose from your chair. You wondered if your skirt was long enough to hide your knocking knees. You reached out to shake his hand and instantly regret that decision. His palm was warm—no, hot. It was hot to the touch, and it took everything you had not to wrench your hand away. Mirio's fingers were giant compared to yours. He gripped your hand almost possessively, but with Mr. Toshinori in the same room, that much Mirio could do. The moment your hands touched, a shiver ran up your spine. You lurched forward and almost fell into Mirio's arms. You clamped your hand over your mouth to prevent your new co-worker and boss from hearing you moan. 
"L/N, what's wrong? You look sick," said Mr. Toshinori. 
"I think…I think I should go home. I'm not feeling so hot." You managed to stammer out. 
"By all means, L/N. If you're not feeling well, you should get some rest. I'll fill out the paperwork, and you can sign it off when you get back."
"Thank you, sir," you mumbled. 
Mr. Toshinori and Mirio left the room. You gathered up your stuff, signed out of your computer, and headed out. As you rounded the corner, you felt someone follow behind you. You turned to see Mirio a few steps at your back. 
"If you don't mind, I'd like to help you to your car. Mr. Toshinori was kind of enough to let me help you since you don't look so good," said Mirio.
"T-Thanks." 
Mirio stayed a few steps behind you rather than walk right at your back. Which you were grateful if anyone asked. The personal space was needed before you passed out. That all changed when you realized that you would have to take the elevator to get to the parking garage below, which meant you had to share it with Mirio standing within arm's reach of you. 
The elevator doors closed with a solemn grumble. Your heart pounded inside your chest. You glanced at Mirio from time to time, waiting for him to make a move. Although what should you be expecting? Were you that suspicious of a man you just met just because he looked similar to the one in your wet dream? Coincidence, you thought. It was all just a coincidence. You were silly, really. A niggling doubt in the back of your mind said otherwise. Mirio didn't just look similar to the man in your dream, he was too tentative, and the way his eyes followed you around should have shot up several red flags. You ignored it in favor of acting like a sensible, rational human being. 
Mirio caught you looking at him once or twice on the way down that seemed to take a century. He merely smiled and kept his hands to himself. If he indeed was the man from your dream, then he would hesitate to put his hands all over you the moment the elevator's doors closed shut. Someone like that wouldn't give a damn about the security cameras either. His smile made you melt; you were practically a puddle when you exited the elevator. Mirio followed behind as you sprinted for your car. You bit your lip. Was this such a good idea to let a strange know what kind of car you drive and what your license plate read? No, no, that couldn't be the same kind of man Mirio was. He was too polite for that creepiness. 
You made it to your car without further incident. Your heart still raced a mile a minute. Mirio stood in the periphery of your vision, never far from your sight. He remained a respectful distance away. 
"Thank you so much for your help. I hope we get to work on future projects together," you said as you fished your car keys out of your purse.
"Let me get the door for you."
Mirio moved so quickly that you didn't have time to protest. He plucked the keys from your hand, pressed the button that would unlock the car, and opened the driver-side door for you. Puzzled, you didn't think twice about the matter. You settled your stuff in the passenger seat next to you and buckled in. You bated your eyelashes without thinking anything wrong. A little flirting never hurt right. 
"Thank you," you said. 
"Not a problem." Mirio beamed. His smile could melt icecaps.
Shutting the door, Mirio leaned through the window you don't remember rolling down. 
"I'll see you tonight." His voice was velveteen. 
Your brows furrowed at his meaning. You were a deer caught in a pair of headlights when you turned to look at him. Those same ocean-blue eyes held a darker intent than merely working with you. It was the vastness of the open sea, cold and ruthless. His eyes were a void meant to suck you in and drown you in their maddening depths. Mirio's smile dimmed to a smirk, and he walked away. You watched him from your car how he turned away, walked back to the elevator, and climb inside. Before the doors closed him in, you swore that Mirio winked at you before disappearing. 
The rest of your day was a blur. You dressed in your favorite pajamas and hoped that some food and mindless channel surfing would solve all your problems. Not only were you not getting paid, but your excuse was also rather lame. As you sat on your couch and stared into your television screen, you wondered when was the last time you got a full night of sleep. You blanked. There had to be a time when you did, but you couldn't remember. Your brain was a jumbled mess, all thanks to those cursed dreams you'd been having. You couldn't even remember the last time you had an ordinary, non-sexy dream with a stranger you hadn't met until today. 
You almost loathed it when it grew dark. Night meant bedtime, and bedtime meant dreams. The longer your brain festered on those dreams, the more you grew to dread them. You looked at your reflection in the bathroom mirror as you brushed your teeth. You took a more extended look at the dark circles beneath your eyes and the sullenness taking over your face. Were your cheeks always that shallow? You spat, rinsed, and turned off the light. 
Mirio slipped through every wall and door to get inside your apartment. He would climb through every fence in the world just to get to you. Your scent was absolutely divine; it drove him insane with want. He licked his lips as he broke past the last barrier keeping you from him. The path to the bedroom was easy and one that he knew like the back of his hand. Mirio mapped out your entire apartment during his nightly trips. 
You paused at your bedside before peeling back the covers. Slowly, you got beneath your blankets and pulled them up to your neck. For the longest time, you lay there stiff as a board under your blanket and sheets. Your eyes darted around the room just to see if your new co-worker was lurking there. You set your phone face down on the nightstand after fifteen minutes of you lying in bed and staring at the ceiling. You flipped your bedside lamp off with a sigh.
You closed your eyes, still expecting Mirio to slink in. The room was silent. The only noise you could make out were the soft footsteps from the people in the apartment above you and the gust of wind against your windowpane. A prayer fell from your lips that whatever was coming for you in the night would leave you be.
He stood at the foot of the bed to watch you sleep. You snuggled up to your blankets like a child seeking protection. A few pieces of cloth weren't enough to protect you from him. Mirio crept a bit closer. When he was stood beside you, he peeled away the blankets and sheets. Lavender wafted up to his nose. 
"Changed your sheets after last night, eh? You humans are so peculiar about your habitats. It is a shame, though. I might have wanted you to sleep a little longer in your come. Get you used to it. Oh, well."
His hands worked the buttons of your sleep shirt, and the silken fabric fell away with no more than a gentle tug. Your long bottoms made him scowl. How dare you hide your lovely from him. That alone deserved punishment. You murmured in your sleep as Mirio tugged your pants and underwear down in one go. Tonight, he had no intention of putting you back together again. You would sleep naked after he was done with you. The only thing he wished he could do was to see your face when you woke up and found yourself naked. No matter. Good things come to those who wait. 
Mirio wasted no time dishevelling his clothes. Being a demon, he could have easily dissolved them or faded through them. He wanted this to be special and want to remember every detail. The act of stripping down made him feel a bit more compatible with you, a human. It was pretend, a show. Eventually, you would see his proper form and tremble. For now, Mirio settled for having you like this, vulnerable to his power and entirely at his mercy. 
He climbed into bed with you and reclined on his side. His tongue ran across his lips just by looking at your body. You shivered in the cold. You should have stirred and awoken to your body bare of even a sheet to protect you from his gaze. Mirio's magic made it impossible for you to open your eyes unless he desired it so. You were going to belong to him shortly enough, but why spoil it now? Mirio thought himself cruel for dragging it out like this but admitted to liking this game.
Mirio ran a finger down the column of your throat and let it trail down to your belly button and back again. He hummed with delight as he touched your smooth skin. He palmed your breast and tweaked your nipple to a stiff peak. Mirio shifted on the bed until his lips found your neck and suckled. He kissed your shoulders and licked your skin. Mirio's large hands groped your chest. 
"You fill my hands up nicely, Y/N. Your body feels like it already belongs to me," he murmured against your skin. 
Mirio placed his knee against your cunt, rubbing your clit occasionally against the hard muscle. He drew your knees upwards and settled himself firmly between your legs. Kissing your lips, his hands never left your chest. While he kissed your mouth, his hands never ceased to pinch and massage your chest. His cock grew stiff, just thinking about what it would look like sandwiched in the middle of your perfect breasts. 
"More time for that later. Let's get down to business, shall we, sunshine?" 
Mirio lined his cock against your pussy, now soppy wet from his ministrations. He smiled to himself at how easy it was to manipulate your body towards his needs. If you had been awake, he imagined that your eyes would roll into the back of your head at the stretch. His cock slipped in with only a little resistance. Your walls clenched around his intrusion before easing up. His first thrust helped him bottom out. Mirio closed his eyes at the feel of your body wet, warm, and tight for him. For him alone. 
"That's my sunshine. That's my girl. Oh, yes," Mirio grunted.
His hands bruised your hips as he dragged you up and down his cock, forced it to meet him thrust for thrust. While you slept, your walls clamped down around Mirio's cock. He snapped his hips back and forth as he felt your strength leave your body and enter him. Call it 'tit for tat.' Mirio was giving your body all the pleasure it could ever need and the seed it so desperately wanted. The only price was just a little bit of your energy. Soon, very soon, Mirio wouldn't need to take any more from you. He would be able to have you all to himself, and no force on earth could stop him. 
Mirio adored the sweet squelching sounds your pussy made as he pounded into it. You were flooding him with your juices, and you didn't even know it. He couldn't wait to see what your eyes looked like when he pleasured your consciousness. Though your mind was too far gone to realize that it wasn't merely a dream, you couldn't wake up until Mirio wanted you to. This was the way of his kind, only most were one and done. Mirio needed more and more of you to himself. He couldn't stop after one feeding. The only way for him to keep you without draining away your life was a simple spell. All he had to do was get you pregnant. 
You were close; he could feel it. Pleasured seared down his spine and threatened to burst, but he wanted to hold out a little while longer. Mirio moved faster, faster. He saw the bruises forming on your hips, the tighter he held on. He would rather crush your hips than stop when you were both so close. Your cunt squeezed around him. 
"That's it, good girl. Squeeze me. I'm going to give you everything. Better not spill a drop."
You whined in your sleep as you arched your back. Mirio watched your face as it scrunched up. In pain or ecstasy, it was hard to tell the difference. Your body convulsed around him. Your floodgates opened to him and coated Mirio's cock with your come. It was more than enough to allow Mirio to do the same. The searing tingle shot down his spine and burst like an explosion. He stopped gripping your hips to seize hold of the headboard and hold it tight. Mirio shoved his cock in as far as it would go to ensure that none of his come leaked out. He could feel himself releasing so quickly that it made his head spin. When the final drop hit, he slowly, reluctantly, pulled away from your welcoming cunt. Your insides and your inner thighs were covered in him, just the way he liked. 
Mirio dressed then looked over his shoulder at your sleeping and battered form. There were bound to be questions when you woke up, but it was a shame he couldn't see it. He satisfied himself for now by kissing your forehead and whispering, "Pleasant dreams."
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