#also if anyone has advice on this i'd appreciate it

[maplesleep]

QUESTION.....would y’all care if i made a ko-fi??

[dodger-chan]

So, it looks like I'm getting a root canal tomorrow...

Why is dental work so fucking expensive? I have dental insurance, and it's still nearly a thousand dollars. Luckily for me this is a survivable emergency expense but holy shit. It almost makes switching to an all oatmeal diet sound like the better idea.

[ask-artsy-oncie]

Ugh. Looks like pretty much every program I run now is telling me to upgrade from Windows 8.1 or go suck a nut.

There goes my last iteration of Windows with no forced voice assistant or fucken. Microsoft Edge integration.

[actuallyyangxiaolong]

I think I have a fishbone lodged in my throat but I'm very stoned and my dad thinks I should go to the ER but also weed has only been legal here for a few months and I don't know if you can even get medical care while high but also the internet says you should see a doctor asap and I'm not even sure if this is real or if I'm just making shit up and overreacting holy SHIT I am freaking out

Jesus Christ I have the worst luck ever

[icarusfrommars]

My brother and I once got high together and sat on my porch, just chatting as brothers do late into the night. About all sorts of dumb shit it doesn't even really matter. There's nobody else in the world who I can just shoot shit with as well as him. And probably nobody else I can be as real with.

I don't even remember what the conversation was about, or what I said to prompt this response, but at some point, while we both sat on my broken ass futon, he turned to me and asked me a question directly to my face.

"Wait, dude, are you trans?"

And at that very moment my mind flashed back to so many different memories. Wondering about how different it would be if I were born a girl while taking too long in the shower, doing multiple streams where I wore a maid outfit as a joke, and, of course, back to that day in middle school when that girl turned to me the same way my brother had, looked me in the eyes, and put a thought in my head that I've lived with for 10 years.

"You would be pretty as a girl."

I don't think that she knew how that would affect me. I don't think I did either. But something about the way she said it, the way she looked at me for a moment and smiled softly before implanting this persistent quote in my head felt like... like she had peered into something deep inside and extracted it through my eyes.

And now, once again, my internal thoughts were being challenged, this time by my brother.

"I mean, it's cool if you are like nothing's gonna change-"

"No." I told him. And I believed it. And I still do believe it. I was born a boy, I had lived as a boy, and I was comfortable with my life remaining that way. I felt no need to discard my birth gender because, well, it had served me just fine for 22 years.

And yet, hesitation. I was high, sure, but still there was something deep down that wanted me to remember all those small thoughts and tiny moments of uncertainty.

We changed the subject. I don't remember to what. I don't even remember if this conversation was real or not or if it was just a dream. But it's another moment that sticks with me, lingering in my head. Another second in time that I should have forgotten by now but I haven't. Because I can't. Because I can't shake the feeling of "what if?" Even if I'm not trans. Even if I come out the other side of whatever weird funk I'm in right now and declare that I am not trans, there's still the "what if's" in my head.

A week ago I had a dream where I was outside of my body, looking at myself like I was on the other side of a mirror. Someone else was there and my head was turned away from me. My hair was long and done up, and the other person was applying something to my face. They turned the chair around and I looked at myself from my side of the mirror and I saw myself but my face was completely done up in makeup. Lips, eyebrows, eyes, everything. Nothing super fancy or drag-esque. Just, like, a normal looking makeup routine. I looked at him and something inside clicked into place. A gear turned for the first time in a long time and even though both he and I fully understood ourselves as a boy, we looked at what we could have been as a girl and we both felt like that feeling was... right.

He and I locked eyes. I remembered the middle school girl's words.

She smiled.

Then I woke up.

I couldn't go back to sleep afterwards until I finally crashed around sunrise just to have some energy for work the next day.

And now for the last week I've been scrambling my brain trying to make any sense of myself at all. Trying to figure out what the fuck I am or if I even want to be anything. It's frustrating and confusing and ridiculously dramatic.

But most of all, it's terrifying.

And most of all, it's incredible.

And most of all, it's sickening.

And most of all, it's right.

It's right there. It's there.

I don't know what it is or what it will look like but there is something there. It's something that has festered since I was too young to understand. It's something that I don't think I'll ever understand or even want to. But what I can't do is ignore it any longer.

And she was right, too.

I would look pretty as a girl.

I am once again thinking about that girl in middle school who looked me in the eyes and then said "You would be a pretty girl."

[kings-highway]

haikyuu ship headcanons except i forgot to think of a theme so they're all unrelated

daisuga: absolutely they casually kissed sometime before confessing to each other. Either as a joke/gag between friends, a dare, or maybe for some kind of student film/stage production, their first (romantic) kiss is definitely not their first kiss. Its probably not even their second. I'd hesitate to say third.

iwaoi: Iwa uses Oikawa being "needy" as an excuse to hide his introvertism. Makki and Mattsun are trying to drag him over to play video games for the 3rd time that week so Iwa's just "ahh, can't, Oikawa's already mad I ditched him the last few nights. You know what he's like, he gets so whiny if I don't give him attention," and meanwhile Oikawa is waiting for him by the gate like "alright I'll walk you home so the lie holds up, but you're giving our friends a bad impression of me and I don't appreciate that."

tsukkiyama: yamaguchi decided he was going to marry tsukki very young and tsukki did not get a say in this. like I'm thinking 11 years old and yamaguchi is daydreaming like "yeah. im gonna make him my husband." concidentally this is also why he doesnt get jealous of girls confessing to tsukki because he has this incredible internal conviction that they'll be married one day. basically he spends the next decade of his life wooing him over and playing the longest game ever and it works. tsukki never realizes exactly how young he was put into yamaguchi's trap.

ushiten: tendou was absolutely downright plagued by sex dreams starring Ushijima in their second year and into their third year and this was incredibly alarming for him because he had never even had a crush on anyone before, nor a dream like that previously, and he hadn't even consciously realized he had any attraction towards him beforehand. well thats one way to figure out you have a crush. and that you're gay.

kagehina: wrong culture but I think these two would fucking nail the promposal thing in theory, but they'd be competing with each other to see who could prompose first and theyd be so caught up in avoiding the other person's so that they could be the one to do it that they'd never actually ask each other to prom and then theyd have to go together but technically alone because they never asked. like theyve been dating for 2 years they both knew theyd say yes, they simply did not let the other ask because they wanted to do it.

matsuhana: they would both deny it with their whole chest, but they actually look up to Oikawa and Iwa as a couple, and will often default to asking them for advice. Even when its really complicated stuff, they trust their judgement. Mattsun and Makki met in high school, so they've always been really jealous of the long, childhood best friend thing and want to be able to know each other that well.

[wonyscafe]

astro appreciation

⋆ ˚｡ ୨୧

☆ my undying love for virgo moons is so intense, you guys are such good listeners and have the perfect advice... you're also so freaking talented!!

★ I once dated a 0 degree aries venus and yes it was short but I have never felt more loved than those 2 months

☆ you gemini placements especially gemini suns always know how to make people connect w each other without even trying too hard, it just happens

★ I'd like to make a quick moment to appreciate all the aquarius moons out there, I've noticed how you can make anyone laugh even during the hardest times

☆ also omg leo risings!! you hype people up and I love u for it!!

★ to all the 12H people out there: your questions are not weird or strange. they're interesting and original. don't let others stop you from asking intriguing questions

☆ also aquarius suns have so much rizz and y'all don't even notice it

★ I will never get tired of listening to a fire/9H mercury. you speak with so much passion about certain topics

☆ all the people I know who have libra sun/moon are so trustworthy during fights. like they will not break your trust, and if they are, they'll 100% receive their karma for it. and they know this. and they're smart so chances are very high that they'll be trustworthy

★ IDC WHAT ANYONE SAYS BUT GOSSIPING W GEMINI VENUS IS SO FUN BRO WHAT

☆ if you ever see someone w pisces placements, don't look into their eyes. you'll literally get lost in them.

★ every single taurus I know is so cozy, like they will legit treat you like a royal if you set foot into their house I'm so serious

☆ the people who have the best rational advice in my opinion, are capricorn mercuries. they come off as an authority figure but I really like that energy. they're just really wise idrk how to explain it...

★ if you have scorpio placements you deal with jealousy SO MUCH bc you're literally so attractive. like the energy you radiate intimidates others in a way that they get jealous of you

☆ I'm telling you sags are the best travel buddies EVERRR me and my sag friends go to different countries or cities everytime we hangout and it's so much fun like???

★ ok but cancer moons. like that's it that's everything THEYRE everything.

☆ something ab 10H placements and being the literal human embodiment of the devil wears prada

★ ok biased but virgo placements >>> something ab them is just so hot like

↳ a/n : I'm definitely not done yet bc MAN I LOVE SO MANY PLACEMENTS!!! but now your girl has to study for her ecology, biology and chemistry exams </3 wish me luck y'all I'm ALMOST DONE!!! have a wonderful day or night 𖹭

[andromeda-nova-writing]

Hate at first sight - Alhaitham Requested by @isekyaaa

Contains suggestive lines for the sake of a joke

“Tighnari, You know anyone who could translate this?” She brought over the book to him. It was an old book she found while cleaning up her grandpa’s house. A book in a foreign language that her grandpa had forgotten over the years leaving its contents unknown to his family. “It’s supposed to be an heirloom.”

Tighnari looked over the book she had handed to him. A language that was unrecognizable to him but recognizable in that he had seen one of his friends reading a book in what looked to be a similar language. “I know a guy. If you're free tonight you might have a chance to get it translated or at least be pointed in the right direction.”

“Why tonight?"

“Cyno made a new deck again. Your translator should be there.”

“I forgot you have game nights with the General Mahamatra. I shouldn't take up too much of your time. Well as long as this translater of yours is good at their job.”

“He is. Just know he can be a little blunt. Though little may be an understatement. And with Kaveh there, don't be surprised if you see some sort of argument.”

“You're friends must be a lively bunch. Wait Kaveh is the one with blonde hair right? He was the one who was here two weeks ago?” She asked making sure her memory was correct.

“He was. Why?”

“He gave me advice on what rug I should pick. He didn't even see where it would go and gave me perfect advice. I really would like to thank him. My living room actually feels like a separate room even though it's an open floor plan.”

“I'm sure he'll appreciate it.”

-

It was nice to say hello to Cyno even though she didn’t know that super well. Most of her knowledge came from Tighnari mentioning him. But that and the fact she didn’t talk to him much meant that she really didn’t know him. It was entertaining to hear a few of his jokes though. The juxtaposition of the wordplay with how stoic his delivery was may have been the only reason she enjoyed them though.

While Kaveh acted as if he had known her for their entire lives. He was warm and welcoming. But also the moment she thanked him it was like he became a second sun in the room. He was extremely giving, offering to give her home interior design advice any time. It was evident in his face and how he spoke how much he appreciated the thanks even if it was just over what shape of rug to get.

It was enjoyable to be around all three of them. Though as nice as their company was it wasn't the reason she Had followed Tighnari along to his game night With his friends at the tavern. She still had a book in her bag that needed to be translated and there was no translator in sight.

“Tighinari, are you sure your translator is supposed to be here?”

“I’m sure he’ll show.”

“Translator?” Kaveh asked before his smile evaporated away. “You’re here for Al Haitham?”

“That’s a first,” Cyno commented.

“Well, now my translator has a name. But yes.” She pulled the book out of her bag. “My grandpa said it’s a family heirloom but no one in my family can even read it. Tighnari said that he’d be able to translate it for me.”

“At a horrible cost though. You couldn't have just sent her in the direction of the Akademiya?” Kaveh asked, being quite dramatic about the situation.

“I'd rather have someone that Tighnari trusts than some I don't know who. The book is an heirloom after all.”

“It will be fine,” Tighnari reassured, he pointed at the door. “Even then, he’s here.”

Al Haitham made his way over to their table. He sat down at the table already looking annoyed at who knows what.

Tighnari was kinda enough to briefly explain the situation to him along with a basic introduction. Even though Al Haitham had agreed to translate he looked as if Y/N's simple request was asking too much. Maybe a frown was just permanently etched into his face.

Al Haitham held the book looking over the cover. “To count the ways.” He translated the cover before flipping through the pages. His eyes widen skimming through the contents. He looked over at Y/N who looked brimming with excitement to learn what was in the book. “This is just erotica.”

Cyno slowly placed the cards in his hands on the table now fully paying attention to what was unfolding in front of him. Kaveh choked on his wine only for Tighnari to pat his back as he coughed. 

Y/N’s face dropped. “It's a heirloom. It’s been in my family longer than my grandpa has been alive. It can’t be. You must be mistranslating it.” She reasoned.

“Your heirloom is in an old form of a Fontaine language. A language I’ve been reading since I was 17. Do you want me to translate it aloud for you?” His words were an insult and a challenge to her.

“If you know it so well then could you give me a real translation.”

Al Haitham rolled his eyes opening the book back up. “Her eyes widen at the sight of his toned chest. In a frantic haze of want she quickly moved to help remove his belt excited to see the sight of his-”

Y/N snatched the book from his hands. Her face was warm with embarrassment. “It was nice talking with you three but I have to go.” She politely excused herself from others before turning to face Al Haitham. “You could drown in a ditch for all I care.”

[chimkennuggies]

Again with the Raphael x Cazador agenda bc I'm still losing my mind over them‼️‼️‼️

Anyway, thought I'd share some headcanons bellow the cut as well:

- I just KNOW they both have hour long conversations about some play they've seen or book they've read. Their taste is similar in that aspect.

- Raphael knows about Lady Incognita's books (that's canon btw) and mentioned it to Cazador once, who instantly started ranting about how the girl didn't appreciate the "gift" (he doesn't appreciate it either if you think about all that datamined/beta stuff + how much he just wants to be "normal" BUT he is also a hypocrite sooo), also, he used to give advice to her whenever he found one of her drafts.

- In a modern setting Raphael would probably be like those annoying filmbros who doesn't stfu about some niche film they've seen and Cazador would be the same with some celtic metal group that has like 24 monthly listeners (kinda projecting in this one, I'm both).

- They would talk shit about anyone + if they go to some ball together after the first 40 minutes they'll probably end up talking only to each other.

- On the hc that both of them are trans, Cazador hasn't had any operations and isn't on t (although it's not bc he's comfortable in his own body but bc he doesn't want to have anything to do with it, he just prefers to live with an idealized version he made on his head after centuries of not seeing his reflection), Raphael is literally the opposite, he has had all the operations and has been on t since he ran away from Cania, hating the self he left behind.

- Now, some shoutouts to the fact that they're both SO AWFUL, I love them being so so toxic.

- Cazador usually doesn't like being touched and Raphael just thrives on being an asshole so he's always breaking the man's boundaries. PDA in the worst possible way.

- Cazador enjoys to compare Raphael to his father because he finds it extremely entertaining the fact that he takes it at heart and gets so offended by it (he knows how much the other has suffered because of his progenitor).

- Cazador having scars on his body from before being a vampire and Raphael biting them‼️‼️

-Raphael listening to Cazador talking shit about all of Raphael's features he despises just to make him even more insecure (let's be real, Raphael is SO fucking self-conscious, because there's no way all his paintings and Haarlep themself being so completely different to his real self is a normal trait).

- Both of them being prone to violence and fighting for every minor disagreement would make them the worst neighbors possible ngl.

- Raphael having the lower canines really really sharp while Cazador has the cuspid canines being almost razor-edged, iykyk.

Lastly, here are some songs I associate w/ them because I haven't seen any playlist include these:

Cazador:

Rule #34 - Fish in a Birdcage

Femtex - Therapy?

Never Wanted to Dance - MSI

Under the Spell - Me And That Man

Heel On The Shovel - 16 Horsepower

Raphael:

The Hell Of It - Paul Williams

Low Estate - 16 Horsepower

Nunemaker's Parable - Everybody's Worried About Owen

You're So Vain - Carly Simon

Bensonhurst Blues - Oscar Benton

An this one is just bc I find it quite funny but Mi Gran Noche from Raphael (the spanish singer) is quite iconic ngl.

[ofstardustanddreaming]

mythological form

preference summary: bg3 characters reacting to you, their s/o, who has some kind of superpowered battle form that they take on in combat while protecting them. you have the design like a giant half-beast form (like Chimera Falin from Dungeon Meshi) and they get like 10x as powerful as you already were.

content warnings: none

fandom: baldur's gate 3

characters: gale, astarion, wyll, halsin, karlach

gender neutral reader

requested by: @tolkien-fantasy

a.n. - i think this is my sign to watch dungeon meshi on netflix, i've been meaning to cause it looks so good lol. (or if anyone wants to info dump some of the show to me, i'd love to hear the lore, it looks super cool from what i have heard/read about this character/show.) i'm also sorry these are coming so late, i thought i'd have more time this week! all of the posts are coming soon after this one, within the next couple days!

Gale: Gale's so attracted to you, oh my god, the camp won't be hearing the end of it. I headcanon that he's so in love with someone who's a protector, who would come in to help him whenever he seemed to be failing, loving that you're so selfless to help anyone in a fight. The moment you take your form in battle for the first time, he certainly wasn't expecting to see what you transformed into. He loved that you could take form that would be beneficial to a fight. He's awkward about asking to see your Chimera form again in private, but he's curios. He can't help that, his personality needing to know about this new transformation. He's asking you a lot of questions about how your transformation works, if you were born like that, what magic it could be anything and everything under the sun he can think of that you might have the answers for.

Astarion: Astarion is a bit more prideful when you initially help him, although he'll admit to being starstruck at your form. He tends to stick next to you in battles though, and you always fail to hide a smile from him when he does so. He scoffs at you when you do smile, but you know it's a defense mechanism. Slowly, over time, you both get closer and he's more likely to ask you questions about your form. He does think it's pretty badass that you become much more powerful in this form. (He finds you stunning in either form, he just really thinks your Chimera form is ethereal to see.) He'll stroke over your form gently, wanting to see what you felt like. Not in the sexual sense, he just wants to take in every part of you. Sometimes he ponders if he'd feel better about himself if he wasn't a vampire, and if he was more like you. (You help him convince himself that he can be a protector too as a vampire, he's not defined by his past.)

Wyll: Like Gale, Wyll consistently talking about you to the camp, very enthralled by what you can do. He loves when you give him advice, strong in more ways than just the battlefield, something he loves a lot. He values wisdom in strength, and loves that you tend to think before you attack, which he thinks is important in someone who has considerable brute strength. One of his favorite things to do is fight with you side by side, loving to see the showcase of wisdom and strength coincide with you. You very much let him have his moments in battle, as he extends the same kindness to you, you're both very much capable on the field. But, he very much appreciates when you step in to help him, thinking your kindness and willingness to help those in defeat makes you a well rounded person, and he's perfectly content to seeing what you can do, really loving your form.

Halsin: He loves that there's someone like him that also transforms into some other form. Although, in his biased opinion, he thinks you're much, much cooler than him. A giant being that can kick ass on the battlefield? He's sold! He's willing to help you find questions to your origins if that's what you're looking for, but if you know everything about your being, he's very curious. He has a thirst for knowledge and he wants to understand his partner on every level. He'll ask a lot about you, wondering how your values are impacted by your being, like how his values around nature are impacted by him being a druid. He loves seeing you on the battlefield, the two of you always a great match against anyone who thinks they can take you. You're both a menace to deal with and the camp is very glad you're both there to help fight.

Karlach: She thinks it's the raddest thing ever, wanting to always wrestle with you in your Chimera form. Karlach wants to use her leftover energy from a fight with you, something you also really enjoy. Where you both go at it with one another with the adrenaline, your match that always ends in laughter. She knows you wouldn't actually hurt her, as she would with you, but you're always a little more considerate, considering your form. When it comes to fights, she's glad that she can count on you to help her if she has many people surrounding her. Granted she is strong enough herself, but she loves having reliable people around her, like you, to help her when the going gets tough. She's loves having another strong s/o, and would never feel threatened with them being as strong/stronger than her.

[bbsmuts]

Monday of Appreciation #1: July 22, 2024

Welcome to my version of Smite's Monday of Appreciation, wherein I'll name a few of the users who I have appreciated since I got on here, so about 2 and a half years. I'll probably do one of these every few months.

#1: @ggidolsmuts

Ah, Ddeun. One of Tumblr's more underrated users, in my opinion. First-class writing and support for me in the earlier (and current) days of my career. I'll never forget the first of yours I read, which was your Fromis App work on Yiren. In fact, reading this and some of your others were what lead me to write for Tumblr in the first place, which is why you place at #1. I wouldn't even be here if it weren't for you.

#2: @xiaoondc

I think it was your Momo ask that really got me noticed, since after that I went from about 50 followers to about 500 in a month. Field Trip was REALLY what got me noticed, which brought me more spotlight. Really, I'd be nowhere without your initial noticing of me. You've been a loyal supporter and advisor who's pitched several good smuts, a few of which are coming soon. And by soon, I mean in 2050. So you are a second crucial role in how I got to where I am. I also appreciate that I can go to you for assistance, advice, or just for moral support at any time.

#3: @aurorororaaa

You were my first follower. Maybe you thought I'd forget you, but I didn't. Thank you.

#4: @jazi1234

You were the first to give a like on my first ever post. Thank you.

#5: @fukurofanfics

You've been a fantastic friend my entire life, as well as being a loyal supporter of my account. Couldn't appreciate you more, man.

#6: @co-reborn

Wrote two of the best Yiren smuts I've ever read, as well as several other fantastic ones.

#7: @idolsgeneration

Somehow finds time to post pictures of my favorite idols like every 10 minutes, and a couple of those posts inspired smuts, either ones I've posted or ones in progress. And some for a long time in the future.

#8: @fillinforlater

Another one of the first writers I discovered on Tumblr, and the one responsible for many a fantastic fic. Also the one who inspired this post.

#9: @sinswithpleasure

Bucket List 5, an incredible Nayeon smut and one of the first I read after some of Ddeun's. Also someone who inspired me to start writing my ideas myself.

#10: @banananutsmuthie

Idol Club was just amazing, and the lore that came with it. Also someone who inspired me to write.

#11: @smuttysabina / @dailysabinasmuts

Phenomenal short fics every day of the week, as well as several longer works which are just as good. I really like your work on Everglow, we need more.

#12: @capslocked

Insanely long fics (it's like 30k works a smut, I swear 💀), but insanely good fics. Yet another who inspired me to write.

#13: @lustspren

Supreme writing, which has inspired the sentence structure and usage of words in some of my work. Was also the author of the first smut I gave a like to, for what that's worth.

#13: @byunrosehajoon

You're my fiancée and soon-to-be wife in about 12 hours. Love you babe.

______________________________________________________________

If anyone feels like they should have been on here, give me a shout and you might be on the next one.

All the best -상훈

[matchakuracat]

chronically ill/physically disabled people, how do you deal with doctors appointments? what do you say/do to advocate for yourself? im autistic and not diagnosed with a chronic illness yet and i really struggle to know what to say to get them to listen to me and understand so that i can get the help and care i need. even if i bring someone with me, they also need to know what to say and i don't know anyone who understands well enough to explain to the doctor for me, which means that i have to tell them what to say before going. but that's the problem since i just don't know.

i have chronic joint pain that ive had for years but has only gotten worse over time. i also have hypermobile knees which are the worse they've ever been right now. i'm chronically fatigued and barely have the energy to eat and do basic hygiene. i have a few friends that i talk to fairly regularly and im very thankful for them but i still struggle so much with maintaining a social life when i cant even maintain my own physical wellbeing. i only go outside when i absolutely have to/when my pain is low enough and i have enough energy. on average i probably leave my house about once or twice a week, usually to go to medical appointments, to an internship i have once a week or to go grocery shopping. i usually try to do both at the same time if i can (like going grocery shopping after my internship) but most of the time i have to ask my parents to get me groceries since i dont have enough energy to. all i want is to be able to go outside just to take short walks and enjoy nature and the fresh air but i can't do so without the right treatment/a mobility aid. everything im doing right now is bordering the line of too much. im constantly tired and overwhelmed and everything feels like a struggle, even the smallest tasks most people do everyday without thinking twice about it.

i have almost only had bad experiences with doctors and other medical professionals like physiotherapists, which has given me a lot of extra anxiety on top of my already pretty bad social anxiety. i really struggle to make appointments and even more so to go to them, and when i bring myself to do so i really struggle to express myself and explain how i feel and how i want them to help me. i almost always get shut down and offered no actual help with any of my problems. i just don't know what to do anymore.

if anyone has any advice i'd really appreciate it. i know that i can't give up because my life right now without accommodations is too miserable, but i also don't know how to move forward.

sorry if this was hard to understand. i really tried my best to explain but im having a bit of a hard time expressing myself right now due to feeling worse than usual.

[the-nobody-tournament]

tired of tournaments where the well-known characters always win?

this tournament is on an indefinite hiatus, but in the meantime if you want an adoptable contestant of your very own, send me proof of a donation to this fundraiser! the details are in the linked post.

if you're a palestinian trying to escape genocide, yes, i will share your fundraiser. i'll also draw something for you if you ask—just let me know what you want. the art will be sent to you privately for you to do what you want with.

update: currently only sharing vetted fundraisers

well guess what? in this tournament, NO ONE knows the contestants! not even me, the one running the show! all we've got is these little one-note descriptions that look like someone was trying to brainstorm some ocs, but stopped after a single trait or trope!

...huh? what's that?

well folks! apparently, even our contestants themselves don't have any more information about themselves! so what do you say we give them a hand with that? after every round of eliminations, a form will open for each remaining contestant where people can suggest an additional trait for them! the top ten suggestions for each will be put into an inter-poll (not interpol, FUCK the police) where our followers can vote on what gets added to who! the further a contestant gets in the tournament, the more developed they will become!

as for the grand prize, for the contestant that grows above all the others, what else would we give them but a name? that's right! the victor of our little nobody tournament will no longer be a nobody!

there are a few ground rules to keep in mind, of course!

these are nobodies! that means they don't have any links to any existing media! don't send in "firebender" as a trait, or it'll just get ignored! instead, try something media-agnostic like "controls fire!"

i don't want to see any trait submissions that have to do with pedophilia, incest, -isms, cults, or a contestant being an abuser.

fanart and interpretations of characters during the course of the contest are more than welcome! you can tag them with "#nobody tournament 2023" and i'll be sure to reblog! do keep in mind of course that other people won't necessarily see the characters the same way you do, and it's possible that future traits might contradict your original headcanons.

all characters generated by this tournament are the collective property of tumblr, and are free for anyone to do anything with, though i'd appreciate it if you linked back to the tournament so more people can discover it! and whatever you do, i definitely want to see it!

you can view the results of the elimination thus far and those of the trait selection at the provided links! check the #intros tag or the directory to see all the contestants, and you can keep an eye on the bracket at this link!

right now, we're starting off round 3's eliminations!

look through #creations or #headcanons to see things people have made for the tournament! need help or advice for writing a contestant? check #resources or send a request to be tagged under #open questions!

tumblr user @magistius has also put together a fan doc tracking the tournament! you can find a link to the post about it right here!

[cy-cyborg]

I assume this is an autism thing, but why is it so hard for people to understand pain is not the biggest problem for me when medical issues come up, sensation and sensory overwhelm is.

Possibly tmi but im at the point where i dont really care anymore lol, right now I'm dealing with a really bad, chronic uti that just will not go away, no matter what anyone does, and this thing has been making my life a living hell for the last month or so. It's not painful, or well, it is, but that's not the most unpleasant effect I need help with. It's the sensations it brings. The tactile sensation of being incontinent, of feeling like I'm busting 24/7 - so much so it's stopping me from being able to sleep most nights - the fact that both these things are so ever-present that I can't concentrate on anything else. I can't do the things I enjoy like writing and drawing because my brain can not filter it out enough to focus, and it's my body, so I can't escape it like I could with an unpleasant sound or smell.

But everyone I've spoken to about it is under the impression that the pain is what needs managing, the pain is whats causing me to be so upset and not be able to concentrate or sleep, even when i say, point-blank, thats not the case. My doctor, the emergency staff who first diagnosed it (i was instructed to go there due to concerns about my kidneys), my mum and dad, my sister, even my partner, initially, though he understands now. But I've told every single one of these people that it's not pain, it's the sensory overload thats causing the problems, and they just... don't get it. Ive tried being as blunt as I can (and considering i have no energy to mask, ive been very blunt), and it just, doesn't seem to compute with anyone. My doctor is trying to help, but his only solution is pain meds until the antibiotics runs their course, which don't help because it's not pain (and yes, i tried it anyway). The emergency doctors did the same. My mum and dad keep suggesting pain management skills they were taught when I was a kid, mum is also suggesting things that make things like the burning part of UTIs less painful, my sister doesn't really have any advice but she keeps asking me about my pain too when she checks in. I appreciate the attempts and all

But it's not pain.

The only one who did get it right away was my psychologist, but she's not the kind of doctor that can really help with this, outside of giving me suggestions for coping mechanisms and how to redirect stimming/meltdowns to be less destructive or harmful. Which is great and I did need that, but I'd really like to not be having the meltdowns in the first place.

This isn't the first time this has been an issue either, but it has been the worst/longest time. I just don't know how to get it across to people that the pain is not my main problem. I know how to manage pain and make it less intense/more bearable (my whole lower body is covered in skin grafts and I've had several amputations, I have a lot of experience with it), but just because it's not pain doesn't mean its not debilitating and seriously impacting my quality of life. And because it just won't go away (i highly suspect it has become antibiotic resistant), I have no idea when this will all end, which makes it all the more worse.

[strawberri-draws]

some Kit Kittredge stickers I want to make at some point :D (Also, if anyone has any advice [check my og tags] I'd appreciate it!!)

[syscultureis]

Hi!!

So, I'm a singlet so please forgive (and correct) any incorrect terminology! I had some questions about writing a character who is a system. I completely understand if you can't answer all of these questions, but I'd really appreciate anything you have the time for!

Can alters interact with each other? Ex. If one alter is fronting, can the other alters communicate with them and each other? Additionally, in what situation would a perosn shift? What does shifting look like? I've heard of alters co-hosting as well, so how many alters can co-host at the same time?

2. Can alters communicate with each other pre-system awareness?

3. Are fictives common, and is there an average amount of alters a person with DID has? If I met a person with DID, what is the likelihood of them having a fictive alter?

4. I think viewing neurodivergence in fantasy/dystopian worlds is a very interesting concept, and I was wondering if creating a character who has DID and the ability to shape-shift would be offensive?

In this scenario, as they shift from one alter to another, they might also change their physical appearances? Would that be rude? The character wouldn't be villianized in any way, and neither would their shape-shifting. I just wonder if someone with DID would look at this character and think of it as awesome representation, or an offensive caricature.

5. Are there any lesser known ways DID affects someone's life? I've heard of memory loss, and social stigma of course, but I was wondering if there's anything else I should consider.

If you (or anyone else) has any additional information for me, I'd be more than welcome to receiving it.

Thank you for responding/taking the time to look at this! I really appreciate any advice I can get, and I know this ask can be dating with how lengthy it is.

:)

1) yes, alters can communicate to the alter that is fronting. It's not always perfect and can sometimes be confusing or very easy to write off as the frontiers thoughts. I assume Shifting means Switching, where the alter controlling the body/fronting switches to a different alter being in control.

A lot of different situations can cause that depending on the system, but stressful situations are a big one for a lot of systems

2) yes, often people assume it's their own thoughts and they're just "talking it out with them self", or it's an imaginary friend, or something similar

3) introjects aren't uncommon, but it's also still very likely to meet a system with no introjects at all. Average alter count depending on the source you find can tell you anywhere from 6-16. When writing a character I would recommend considering what traumas you think would've caused a split, or what situations would require a different alter to take care of to help you decide system size for characters

4) personally I think that would be super cool, but I can't speak for the whole community. But I do think as long as you're respectful with the actual disorder itself it's okay

5) not knowing who you are for days at a time, thinking about thinks and genuinely feeling nothing about them because of emotional amnesia, struggling to think on days that have heavy dissociation. Also other alters spilling your secrets ;-;

* we don't speak for the whole community, we encourage you to also do research outside of Tumblr as we are not professionals