#also i've been told people send my fics to friends but you're the first who brings up their dad so congrats????

[trashcanwithsprinkles]

I just started reading your fic Cyanide Narwhal yesterday (I’m on chapter 33!!) and I’m really loving it.

But on a different note. I just read your other fic “Every good intention (is interpolation)” and I really liked it. Honestly it may not have been intended that way but it was kinda philosophical. It makes you think of is your personality how you think it is or how other people percieve you. (I’m probably thinking to deeply.) But I did share it to my dad, because I thought it was quite interesting. ^^

Toodles

Crown <:

[runningfrom2am]

leveling the playing field X

summary: with nowhere else to go after getting caught cheating to help lucy gray, you both make some desperately stupid decisions.

pairing: coriolanus snow x fem!reader

wc: 3.1k

tags/warnings: capitol brat!reader, maybe slightly ooc coryo, idk i tried my best. do they love each other or hate each other? who knows (we do, kind of). implications and mentions of abuse, so read with caution!! also a little bit of swearing but that's neither here nor there

masterlists // nav // requests

a/n: hi all!! i have some slightly annoying news (I'm so sorry) but i think i have to close my taglist for this fic and for other coryo stuff (which i am working on bc I've seen the requests!!) bc its gone up almost 150 people and i can only tag 50 people per post and it is SO much work to tag everyone individually even after i paste them in and i don't want to have to reblog it 2 or 3 times to tag everyone :(. I'm so sorry like i said ik its annoying but if you'd like to be the first to know ab new parts and you're not already in my taglist, feel free to turn on my post notifs!! that way you'll also see everything else including my asks ab the fic where i answer more questions and we talk theories and all that fun stuff :)

next part

Coriolanus was having a hard time adjusting to the life of a peacekeeper, but he was getting there. He sent off that letter for you almost as soon as he arrived, but was yet to receive a response so that seemed like an answer enough. He had to forget you, especially if he wasn't going back to the Capitol anytime soon.

He was homesick, to say the very least. Both of his bunkmates were out, likely working, but he didn't care much to know exactly where. He was just relieved to have a moment to himself to wallow in his self-pity, chest constricting tighter and tighter with every breath.

A door slammed shut down the hall, followed quickly by his own door opening- at which he held his breath. He had to get it together.

"Is this bunk taken?" Someone asks, a voice not belonging to either of his bunkmates, but he recognizes it nonetheless.

He shot up straight, taking in the appearance of the boy in front of him. "Sejanus!" He had never been happier to see his classmate, hopping out of his top bunk to quickly give him a hug.

"This is a surprisingly warm welcome for someone who almost got you killed." Sejanus chuckled, hugging him back.

Coryo laughs slightly, pulling away and grabbing his shoulders. "Oh, no. Quite the opposite. What are you doing here?"

"About the same as you." He shrugs, sliding his things under the bed below Coryo's. "They were going to expel me, but my dad paid them for my grad certificate and let them send me here. They got a new gym on the condition that they let us both graduate."

Coryo should be relieved, but a graduation certificate doesn't matter much if he's stuck here for the next twenty years. "And Y/N/N?" He asks.

"Y/N?" Sejanus asks, lifting his head back in confusion. "What about her?"

"Did she graduate too?"

"I... I don't know, I didn't know she was in trouble. We were told she was sick."

Coriolanus's stomach drops. That's a story he'd certainly heard before, and he didn't like at all how that ended. He swallows, nodding a little bit as he looks at the floor. "So you didn't see her at all?"

"No... Not since the last time I saw you." Sejanus states. It had been a few weeks now. "But, her mother came to our door a week or so ago, real early in the morning. Ma shooed me away but I heard them talking, it seemed like she didn't know where Y/N was either. She was looking for her, wondering if any of us had seen her."

Again, this is what Coryo had seen before with what happened to Clemensia. Her parents weren't allowed to see her at all while she was in the hospital. "I think she's dead." He admits.

"What? What makes you say that?" His friend gasps.

"I... I heard her screaming when I left our meeting with Highbottom." Coriolanus explains. "At first it was normal Y/N screaming, you know, but then it got worse and worse until it just... stopped." He hoped Sejanus would change his story, that he would remember seeing you at school or on the streets or at one of your parent's obnoxious parties, having a good time, and being yourself. That maybe he had just forgotten, but the look on Sejanus's face tells him that didn't happen.

It was Sejanus's turn to look down now, giving a solemn nod. "I mean, no." He laughs suddenly, shaking his head. "They wouldn't kill her on campus- if you could hear it, she's not dead. They wouldn't kill her just like that, right?" He says, trying to convince himself of that truth. "Surely she's just sick. Maybe grounded, or something."

"Yeah, yeah. Probably..." Coriolanus concedes, hoping that somehow Sejanus was right.

Simultaneously, you were adjusting beautifully to life in District Twelve. You got in the habit of borrowing Lucy Gray and Barb Azure's clothes, and they let you sleep on the floor between their beds. For the first time in your life, you were free. No one knew you, no one had a single expectation of you besides Tam Amber appreciating your help with the goats and occasionally going to the market with Lucy Gray and Maude Ivory to get food. It was refreshing, to say the very least. Everyday you felt yourself unwinding more and more.

"Do you play any instruments, Y/N?" Maude Ivory asks you, skipping to catch up to you as you hike down a trail out to the lake with the rest of the covey.

"I do, actually." You nod at her, a small smile on your face. "Try three."

"Three!" She claps excitedly. "What do you play? You'll have to perform with us! Do they have different instruments where you're from?"

"Not really." You giggle, putting your hands in the pockets of your bright red skirt. "I play the piano, and the violin, which is just like Clerk Carmine's fiddle, but much more boring, and a harp, if you've ever heard of that."

"You play the fiddle?" The young girl smiles.

"Not like he does." You smile at the boy as he walks ahead of you, not paying any attention.

"I'm sure you're just as well." Lucy Gray interjects, bumping her shoulder with yours as she walks next to you. "Maude Ivory, you should hear her projection. I'm yet to hear her sing, but boy, can she yell."

"I can't sing." You laugh, shaking your head. "Back home you don't sing unless you're training for the opera, and you have to start that around the same time you learn to walk. My parents would rather me learn the piano."

"Then why am I the one yellin' at all our shows? You should step up." Maude Ivory giggles, and you just shake your head, ruffling her hair.

"I definitely couldn't do it nearly as well as you." You insist. "Besides, I have stage fright." You joke, mostly to get her off your back.

She laughs as she fixes her hair, running to catch up with the kids in front of her.

"She just adores you." Lucy Gray smiles. "It's nice to have a new face around."

You smile, watching Maude Ivory collect flowers from the side of the road. "She reminds me of my brother. They're about the same age."

"Right, you lent me his guitar." Lucy Gray says, a particular sadness in her tone tipping you off that she believes you should be upset about leaving him. You miss him, sure, but he's better off now with you gone. Besides, he couldn't be any worse than you. Your parents have always doted over him, and there's no doubt in your mind that now that you are gone, it's multiplied.

"Yes. That's him." You reply, accompanying a moment of silence between the two of you.

"Do you miss him?"

"Sure." You nod, kicking a small stone down the path in front of you. "But he's better off without me there. That brings me enough peace to sleep at night."

"Hey, can I ask you something?"

"Shoot." You smile at her, grateful for the change of topic.

"What happened to Coriolanus?" For the first time in weeks, you feel a pinch of discontent in your gut at her question.

"I don't know." You lie, shrugging your shoulders. You don't even know why you felt the urge to lie at all, you knew he was here somewhere but you hadn't seen him once. Out of sight, out of mind is what you have been trying to convince yourself. "He's alive, I'm sure. Peacekeeping in one of the districts probably."

"Oh, I was hoping you would know more."

"It would be nice." You agree. "But he's not exactly in my good graces at the moment."

"It feels so out of character for him to betray you like that, doesn't it?" Lucy Gray asks.

You laugh, shaking your head. "It was unusual. That's what I thought, anyway." You sigh, giving a slight shrug. "I haven't told anyone, but we had... I don't know, a moment, a few weeks ago. During the games. Just a couple of days later and he's throwing me under the bus like I meant nothing to him. We've been friends for years- I thought everything was about to change for the better, and then..."

"That's cruel." She says disapprovingly. "I bet he's sorry now that you're gone with the wind. He's regretting it. I promise you that much."

You smile slightly at the thought, allowing yourself to entertain it, if only for a moment. "He better be."

"Is that for me? Oh, c'mon y'all, you know that I gave up drinkin' when I was twelve..." Lucy Gray says, taking a sip out of the clear liquor bottle someone in the audience handed to her. "Oh, It's to clear my pipes, just to clear my pipes." She clarifies, tossing the bottle back into the audience.

Coriolanus watches leaning against the side wall of The Hob. He's happy to see that Lucy Gray is back to doing what she loved, and she made it home alive and well. He's also more than pleased to finally get off the barracks for something other than work. "Now, who's ready for a song, huh?" She smiles, looking down off the stage to her right. "Okay, comin' right up. First, I'd like to introduce to the stage with a big welcome, a grand ole friend of mine, The lovely Sage!" She says, giggling at her rhyme as another girl climbs up on stage, giving Maude Ivory and Lucy Gray a quick hug each.

Coriolanus looks away as the crowd cheers, scanning the crowd for Sejanus who had just excused himself to grab a drink a couple minutes ago. He's wondering where his roommate could have disappeared to when Lucy Gray's friend starts speaking.

"Well hello, everyone, so lovely to meet you all! I have never felt so welcome anywhere." His head snaps back to the stage. He'd know that Capitol accent anywhere, even as you pause to allow any cheers to quiet down. "I mean that." You grin, hands clutched to your chest. "And that feels so good, considering Lucy Gray all but forced me up here." You laugh, draping an arm over her shoulder, letting her take back over. How could this be real? Coryo is tempted to rub his eyes or pinch himself to make sure he's even awake. He was so sure you were dead, but despite the different name and completely different clothes, he was positive it was you. The pang in his chest made that obvious, along with the wave of surrealism that suddenly surrounded him so all he could see was you.

"Now, my beautiful girl Sage here will be taking over for our friend on the fiddle, we'll give the band a quick break, and we're gonna have a bit of a change of pace while she's lending us her talents." Lucy Gray says, and Coriolanus watches as you take the beat-up violin from the young boy gratefully. He knew you played, but he hadn't heard it for years. You looked so calm, something he wasn't sure he had seen in public since you were young. He can't pull his eyes from your figure as it graces the stage with your presence, lighting up the room even if it was only for him.

A small smile grows on his face as you start to play, several whistles echoing through the room before Lucy Gray even joins in with her singing. He wants to scream, to cheer and clap and yell and tell everyone in this dark, rundown building that this 'Sage' was his. Inarguably and undoubtedly his. Coryo's pride is only curtailed when he recognizes the song; it was the ballad Lucy Gray played in her interview on your brother's guitar.

The sophistication your violin playing brought to the piece almost made it sadder and infinitely more haunting. It's beautiful. Now with your classical touch, the song sets a pit of guilt in his stomach. That somehow, even without you singing, it's now a ballad from you to him.

"Just let me remind you what I am to you..."

He makes eye contact with Lucy Gray as he shifts his gaze away from you. She pauses for only a moment, hands still moving rhythmically over the strings of her guitar. She smiles and nods at him, jaw slightly agape as she glances back at you to see if you noticed him. When it's clear you haven't, she gets back on track with the words within only a moment.

"'Cause I am the one who looks out when you're leaping. I am the one who knows how you were brave..."  Your lips turn up in a small smile as she sings, eyes still shut while you focus. Even though he's sure you're thinking of him, it doesn't bring him much consolation. Well, at least you were thinking of him. He would take it.

The song ends as quickly as it starts, and despite the slower tone, the audience is still excited. More so as the band returns to the stage and you return the violin to Clerk Carmine before turning back around to give a bow. You wave out to the audience, reveling in the whistles and praise before reaching out for an extended hand, accepting it as its owner helps you down. "That was stunnin', where'd you learn to play like that? I've never heard anything quite like it." The man asks, still holding your hand out in between you.

"Oh, thank you. I've been playing my whole life." You grin as the music picks up again.

"Can you dance like you can play?" He asks, lifting your arm to spin you.

"I can certainly try." You laugh, going along with it as he pulls you into a more open space of the crowd, and to Coriolanus, it seems like you're taunting him. You're dancing like you don't have a care in the world, dressed in a skirt that looked like it was made out of a red bed sheet cut up and stitched back together in half-hazard squares, and what looked like one of your t-shirts cut up into a tank top that exposes most of your stomach and back. Appallingly too, a smile present on your face that he had dreamt of seeing again one day but was certain he never would. The only problem is that you're dancing with someone else. Not that he was much of a dancer, but he could try if he had known that's what you wanted.

He's planning his method of attack. He can't leave without speaking to you, because he doesn't even know if you'll be back here the next time he gets a day off. Though, based on your appearance and newfound carelessness, it's likely.

His urge is just to kiss you, but the only thing holding him back is that it could set you off. If you hadn't heard his apology from miles away, would you still be angry at him? But actions speak louder than words. He knows that physicality works with you, and it was hard to deny that he hadn't dreamt of how soft your lips felt on his for weeks. One time was just simply not enough for Coryo.

Coriolanus scowls as the man you're dancing with spins you again, making you laugh as he drapes an arm around your waist.

Maybe he should get Sejanus, see if he's seen you yet.

Another spin, and a hand sliding lower down your bare back as the man pulls you closer, his fingers landing on the waistband of your skirt. When was the last time that scumbag had so much as washed his hands? Coryo wonders to himself, rage boiling up under his skin.

Kiss her. Definitely kiss her.

But if the song choice was any indicator, you definitely weren't pleased with him. It couldn't be, though, because how would you know he would be in attendance? Coryo finds his feet carrying him through the crowd, pushing past a dozen carelessly drunk people in his effort to get to you before he's even thought it all through.

Your brow furrows as a body forces itself between you and your dancing partner. "Hey! What are you-" You cut yourself off, hypnotized by the cold blue eyes staring down at you.

That's my girl. Even though you're angry, Coriolanus is grateful to be the object of your gaze once more.

"'Scuse me, man, do you mind?" The man says, making an effort to push Coryo away. He turns, and before you can intervene he's swinging his fist right at the other guy's face, finding its target in a fraction of a second.

He stumbles back, grabbing his face as it immediately drips blood from his nose onto the floor. There are gasps in the crowd as it disperses around you.

"Hey, settle down, settle down now." You hear Lucy Gray call out amidst the music playing in the background while you grab the back of Coryo's shirt, pulling him back before he continues to beat up your dancing partner.

"Coriolanus, what are you doing here?" You shout over the music. He shakes out his fist, turning back to you now and grabbing your face, pulling you closer to kiss you instead of dignifying you with a response. His actions would certainly speak louder.

You want to be angry, but that falters as you feel his lips on yours again, his hands planted firmly on either side of your waist as he holds onto you so tight you weren't sure breathing was an option- even if you could. You followed him here, of course you wanted to see him, but how could he betray you so easily and expect forgiveness in a kiss?

It takes you longer than it probably should to build up the courage to place your hands on his chest, shoving him back. "What is wrong with you?" You spit, looking him up and down in the blue uniform signified of a peacekeeper off duty.

"What's wrong with me?" He asks, looking around and gauging how many people were even taking notice. "What do you mean, Y/N/N, I wanted to-" Clearly you hadn't heard his silent apology, or it just wasn't enough.

"Hey!" You hiss, jumping at him and attempting to cover his mouth at the use of your nickname, and he quickly swats away your hand. "Let's go. Outside, now." You shove him back by his chest, pointing towards the exit.

You look up at Lucy Gray on stage, still singing as she watches you nervously. You give her a nod and a small reassuring smile before linking arms with Coryo and guiding him toward the door. Just like old times.

taglist: @keziahcore, @kitscutie, @annaelise, @serrendiipty, @fratboyharrysgf0201, @totallynotkaibiased, @stelleduarte, @klplynn, @secretsicanthideanymore, @bejeweledreverie, @gloryekaterina, @andrewgarfieldsbitch, @queenofspades6, @pepperonipastas, @ladybug0095, @lunamothwrites, @sbrewer21, @mus-tbe-a-weasley, @splxtscreen, @unclecrunkle, @karmaswitch, @coconut-dreamz, @nekee-lilac02, @ooooglymoooogly, @riddlerloveb0t, @lovedbalances, @notyourwildestdream, @snowlandson-top, @too-lit-for-fanfic, @utopiakys, @deafeningballoonnacho, @roosterschanelslut, @chmpgneprblem, @cosmoetik, @lauravanderbooben20, @dry0campa, @luclue, @lokidala, @urvampgfsworld, @carolanns-world @nan-nie, @shakespearseclipse, @iovemoonyy, @notyoursweetheart-honey,  @xyzstar, @eatpizzasass, @slytherinholland, @queenofshinigamis, @elodiebeau, @soulessjourney

i've closed my taglist for coryo now!! sorry to everyone who wanted to be added, but unfortunately there was significantly more demand than i expected and i sadly just cant tag everyone. BUT! if you still want notifications when i post for this fic, please turn on my post notifs!!

[thankeywa]

hi babes i hope YOU MISSED MY SUPER DETAILED REQUESTS! so, for a long time now im craving for the “rut”, “heat”, “nest” and other a/b/o dynamics inserted on avatar universe, so i WAS HOPING:

could you pretty please write something about lo’ak and reader (a female na’vi) where they're best friends and both insanely in love w each other – reader already had her "cerimony" meaning she needs to find a partner soon, but lo'ak has been convincing readers parents to decline any mate offers because none of them is good enough for her. one day, reader's heat come and bsf lo’ak comes to the rescue? i need a cocky possessive lo’ak in my life and I KNOW you're the one whos gonna gimme !!!!!

lov u, drink water and stay safe <3

The Right Profile | Lo'ak x fem!Omaticaya! reader (a/b/o smut).

Happy Valentine's Day to all my readers! As always, requests are open. Minors DNI!

A.N= everyone needs to know that every time you send me a request my mind makes me put everything on standby until I get it done. Also, I have a major weakness for a/b/o and I've been dying for someone to send me a request like this, so yeah, your wish is my command. For anyone who wanted the new installment of Star-crossed instead of this, you can send your complaints to @punkrockrogers (I'm kidding, obviously).

Summary: exactly what's in the request but I found some juicy canon info about Lo'ak failing to tame an ikran on his first attempt and almost dying in the process, and you can bet I'm going to use that for this fic. So, our boi failed his driver's test therefore he does not get to smash. Both Lo'ak and reader are aged up (20 y/o). Title from the song 'The right profile' by the Clash. Quotes in this: one is from Avatar 2009 and the other is by Goethe.

T.W= this is going to be A LOT, if there ever were an Omegaverse phd course, I would be teaching that class, so if that stuff is not for you, scroll away now. NSFW: p. in v., a/b/o dynamics, mating cycles (heat, rut), marking, scent marking, knotting, breeding, also possessive!Lo'ak (our boi is a lil ooc in this, I don't condone this type of behavior in a relationship, it's all for the sake of the story, you know the drill, if this might be disturbing to you, again give this story a miss).

word count: 8k

Mini na'vi dictionary:

'evi= child (said affectionately by an elder)

Tsurokx= rest/sleep

yawne= beloved

syulang= flower

Ngaytxoa= forgive me

Oeya= my (possessive)

yìmkxa= banshee catcher

The Na'vi say that every person is born twice. The second time is when you earn your place among the people, forever.

"I do not wish to take part in the Uniltaron without you." Y/n had told Lo'ak, still distraught from the events of that day. His best friend had been the first of their group to manage to tame her ikran, of course, she had. And now she was set to take part in the Dream Hunt before finally taking her rightful place among the people along with the rest of Lo'ak's peers, while he was left behind.

He had failed and almost fallen to his death during his attempt, and now his parents were going to make him wait until he was 'truly ready' before he could try again. His father had thought it was somehow his business to step in and stop him from trying his second attempt at taming the banshee then and there. Lo'ak had never felt more embarrassed, especially because y/n had immediately dismounted from her ikran and run to his aid the second she'd seen the scene unfold before her eyes.

"You have already waited five years for me to complete my training..." Lo'ak dismissed her words. "And I won't be the reason you wait any longer..." Y/n had never said it out loud, but Lo'ak knew it was true. She'd been postponing her rite of passage so that they would have joined the clan together, and he couldn't deal with it anymore.

"But Lo'ak, I do not care about-"

"Well, you should care." He snapped at her, not really knowing where his anger was coming from. Sure, he'd just had what could have been described as the worst day of his life, but something and been simmering inside him all week. And now Lo'ak felt like he'd reached his limit. In a few hours, the young Na'vi male was going to discover that anger was only a prelude to his first rut. "Everything comes easy to you, but it's like you don't even notice! No one ever said we needed to be attached to the hip for the rest of our lives, so why don't you just get over it and do what's expected of you?"

The second he saw the heartbroken look on y/n's face, Lo'ak wanted to take it all back. He hadn't meant to say any of those things, of course he hadn't. She was his best friend, she was the woman he loved, yet he'd passed up his chances to ever be with her twice in a single day. He was petty and weak, unable to own up to his own shortcomings, and now he was taking it out on the only person in the world who would have never judged him for it.

"I see..." Y/n said, her voice laced with grief. For a single, stupid second Lo'ak had deluded himself into thinking she was about to say 'I see you', it was what he wanted to tell her. He'd been wanting to tell her for so long. "I have... been foolish. I thought that maybe you... that we..." Y/n wiped a tear away from her face, and stepped back from Lo'ak when he tried to reach out for her. "I do not need your pity." She hissed at him, feeling that Lo'ak had just rejected her. "You have made yourself understood."

With that, y/n disappeared from Lo'ak sight and into the darkness of the night. By the time Neteyam found him, Lo'ak was already in the throes of a terrible fever. His father and brother took him to a secluded place where he would have been safe, but couldn't do much for him besides that. Moat had said the rut hit Lo'ak so suddenly that he was beyond being helped with any sort of treatment. He had no mate, and neither did he have the right to choose one. Left alone to endure the most excruciating pain known to the Omaticaya people.

A lot could change in a week. Especially when it came to things taking a drastic turn for the worse. Lo'ak, who was still experiencing the occasional violent aftershock from the trauma he'd just finished enduring all by himself, was about to get accustomed to a whole new kind of pain.

"We seek your guidance, Tsahik." Y/n's parents had come to speak to his grandmother, while she was still in the process of checking he hadn't suffered any irreparable damage during his absence. "Our daughter, y/n, does not wish to wait for love to find her. She has invoked the old ways, asking us to choose a mate for her." Another violent fit wreaked havoc over Lo'ak's body, but this time he wasn't entirely sure it was due to the aftermath of his rut. Moat had told him the worst was now behind him. "Cease your whining, 'evi." She reprimanded him. "Only by regaining your strength will you find the way to be whole again." While that statement sounded overtly obvious to him, the look his grandmother gave him made him think she was trying to tell him something more.

"Forgive us, we have come at a bad time." Y/n's mother said, directing her sympathies to Lo'ak. They had always been kind toward him. "Your grandson is still injured, y/n has been heartbroken about it. We have prayed to Eywa every day for your swift recovery-"

"He has recovered." Moat cut her off. "And your daughter cannot force her childish whims on you. She is a woman, a warrior of this clan, she cannot hide behind her parents. We only arrange the marriages of future Tsahik and Olo'eyktan, for they are given gifts by Eywa herself to guide the people. The old ways have brought nothing but suffering, I remember the time when they were enforced all too well. They are only to be invoked in drastic situations, such as the event of a heat."

"We are grateful for your wisdom, Tsahik." Y/n father said. "But that is precisely what we fear... she is already showing signs. Every day our daughter grows weaker. We know she may not survive without a mate, and now it is too late for her to make her own choice."

"Fools." Moat almost spat. "Bring her to me at once-"

Lo'ak was on his feet and running out of the healing tent at once, no longer willing to listen to a single word of that conversation. Mating cycles were usually something that a couple faced together, but he and y/n had waited too long for their rite of passage. In that time they hadn't found the person who was truly right for them, so now y/n was going to force herself to be with someone or face her heat alone, along with the consequences that entailed. And it wasn't like Lo'ak could step up and ask her parents to marry her, he wasn't even part of the clan. Not only that, y/n also probably thought he wanted nothing to do with her.

He went looking for y/n everywhere. She wasn't in her tent, nor was she staying with her parents. Word was she'd gone hunting, and after a desperate search, Lo'ak ended up finding her in his own living quarters when he returned home in the early hours of the morning. As much as Lo'ak wanted to yell at y/n in frustration because he'd been worried sick over her, the sight of her sleeping peacefully quelled his anger. He knelt down to touch her forehead, and let out a breath of relief. Her body temperature hadn't drastically risen just yet.

Lo'ak took a look around and only then noticed y/n had rounded up the entirety of his possessions to surround herself with in her sleep. She had made a bed out of the skins and paintings which used to adorn the inside of his tent while holding on rather tightly to a piece of fabric he quickly recognized as one of his loincloths. He felt himself turn into a deep shade of blue in the face and attempted to gently tug the item out of her grip, but y/n growled menacingly in her sleep, immediately making Lo'ak give up on his intent. He did not wish to wake her. Not when it was clear she'd been so distressed, she'd felt the need to make herself a nest just to feel safe.

"Tsurokx, yawne..." Lo'ak wished her a good sleep, and went to tell her family she'd been found.

Her parents were thankful, and just because Lo'ak was not allowed to catch a single break, it turned out y/n parents trusted him so much they began to ask him his personal opinion on the skxawngs that had already shown up to ask them to be her mate. Lo'ak respected y/n's parents and knew they were only worried about their daughter, but he was running on zero hours of sleep, and the image of y/n curled up in a nest she'd made of his belongings was still too fresh in his mind, so he let his worst side get the better of him. He lied. Something so deeply human, his people did not even have a word for it.

"...I would not even consider Selkath, he is too arrogant to even see past himself..."

"Pantoran is weak, I would not trust him to provide for your daughter..."

"... I have known Skakoan to have used cruel words against y/n. She does not deserve her..."

The more he spoke, the more Lo'ak realized he was describing himself and the way he had treated y/n, not giving a true judgment of his peers. And her parents were trusting him with that information, even though he had absolutely no authority to be judging anyone. But there was no reason to worry, a fresh batch of idiots would have shown up to declare their 'love' soon enough, over and over again until eventually someone was found.

Lo'ak slept on the cold hard ground just outside his tent, barely getting an hour's sleep before the day began for the rest of the clan.

"Showing your worth to the clan, as usual, Su-ly?" A voice Lo'ak knew all too well asked, as he was 'accidentally' stepped on and woken up. Tholothian had never been too shy about disliking Lo'ak, and the feeling was entirely mutual. "Watch where you're going, Tho'lo." He growled as he stood up, certainly not in the mood to be taking anyone's crap. The other Na'vi was also standing entirely too close to the tent where y/n was currently resting, and Lo'ak was about the get real territorial real fast if the skxawng didn't back off. The low rumble in his throat was still there, and Lo'ak was making it very clear he was not to be messed with at that moment.

Tholothian, who thrived off humiliating the younger Sully brother in any way possible, had to take a step back. Lo'ak had been missing for an entire week, and now that he was back, he seemed to have doubled in size. He was taller, his shoulders wider, his once delicate-looking human hands bigger, and his muscles considerably more defined. And his entire demeanor also seemed... different, menacing almost. Never before would he have considered Lo'ak Sully competition, least of all a threat. So he decided to back off, for the time being at least.

What he wanted was y/n, and Lo'ak couldn't claim her. There was no pride in kicking someone down when they had already lost. Or was there? "I was just on my way to see, y/n..." Tholothian gloated, knowing it was a sore subject for Lo'ak. "You must have heard... she is searching for a mate..." The look on Lo'ak face darkened considerably, and it would have been a lie not to admit he was reaching for his dagger to challenge Tho'lo to a duel and see which of them could draw first blood, when y/n audibly called Lo'ak's name from inside the tent.

Tholothian paled considerably when he heard y/n call out to his rival and Lo'ak smirked, basking in the pride he felt at that moment. Y/n was probably waiting inside to give him an earful about disappearing for a week, but Tho'lo didn't know that. "Yeah, man. I heard." He sneered, his cocky attitude back in full swing. "I'd wish you luck, but I think it'd be fairer if I gave you a little advice instead..." Lo'ak lowered his voice and pointed his dagger in the direction of Tho'lo chest. "If you, or anyone of your friends, come sniffing after y/n again, just know you're going to have to get through me first." He snarled, showing a full set of teeth, before heading back inside to see y/n.

"Hey..."

"Hey? That's all you have to say?" At least she was still lucid enough to be mad at him, Lo'ak thought. There was still time. Y/n threw the first thing she could find at his head, but Lo'ak managed to dodge it. "Where were you?"

"I was sick." Lo'ak said, and cautiously sat down next to her. He didn't know how else to describe what he'd been through, without inadvertently bringing up her own situation.

"Sick?" Y/n asked, still not understanding why he'd been away from home if he'd been ill.

"I'm sorry I missed your ceremony." Lo'ak said truthfully, the regret clear in his voice, even though he'd just avoided her question. "And the dream hunt, and all of it... the reason why doesn't matter, I should have been there for you."

Y/n hugged her knees to her chest, her worry not subsiding at all. What could have been so bad, Lo'ak couldn't even tell her about it?

"So... you're going to be mated soon..." Lo'ak didn't even know why he said it, other than the fact he was always the one to break the silence and say the things others wouldn't. "Why are you making your parents choose for you?" He asked when she didn't respond. "Y/n you know that's stupid..."

"What? Now honoring our traditions is stupid?" Y/n snapped at him, barely leaving any distance between them. "Weren't you the one who said I acted like I didn't care? That I should start doing what's expected of me?" She threw his words back in his face and Lo'ak immediately understood how the entire insane idea of an arranged marriage had come to her in the first place. He'd made her feel less than worthy, like she wasn't grateful enough to be part of the people, and now she was trying to make up for it, even though it was never true in the first place.

"Y/n... I never should have said those words... I wasn't myself that day, you have to believe me..." Lo'ak implored her, but it wasn't enough to keep the tears from rushing down her face.

"Well, it doesn't matter now..." Y/n kept half the truth to herself. She'd childishly thought that Lo'ak would have tried to prevent her from her recklessness and chosen her himself. But clearly, it had been a fantasy. "Lo'ak, I know what's happening to me... and I'm scared, I don't know what's worse, facing it alone or...or..."

Lo'ak pulled y/n into his arms then, holding her close as he felt her tremble against his chest. "You won't have to face this on your own, and... and I'll make sure you'll be with someone worthy, who'll take good care of you..." His words were like daggers to her chest, because there was no one else she could ever want besides him, yet she understood Lo'ak was trying his best to comfort her. Y/n buried her face in the crook of Lo'ak's neck, breathing in his scent. It was a lot stronger now, and only at that point did she realize so many things about his appearance had changed.

There were two small glands, one on either side of his neck, where his scent seemed to be strongest, and she was suddenly overcome by the need to be covered in it. Y/n began to purr softly, rubbing her face against Lo'ak's neck, not really knowing what she was doing other than chasing after the feeling of comfort and protection that came along with dousing herself in Lo'ak pheromones. "What are you doing, y/n?" Her bestfriend asked, his voice sounding considerably deeper than it had been a few seconds ago. "Feels nice." Was the entirety of the explanation she gave him, without showing any intention of stopping. Not that Lo'ak wanted her too.

He suddenly understood why she'd come to his tent in the first place, and that was to seek out whatever still held his scent, to numb out any feverish symptoms her pre-heat was going to throw at her. Lo'ak knew they were treading a dangerous line, but he also knew he would have given anything to have felt any sort of comfort during his rut, and he couldn't bring himself to tear himself away from her. The type of contact y/n was craving at that moment was completely harmless, yet the idea that she needed to be marked with his scent so badly made a Lo'ak feel possessive in a way he hadn't even known was possible. "Yeah? Is that what's been stressing you out, baby?" He cooed, wrapping her braid around his hand and tugging it softly. "You just wanted to breathe in my scent, didn't you?"

Y/n whined at his touch and nodded feverishly at his words. "Y-yes... I missed you, and I didn't know where you were. I just knew you were hurt..." She rambled, but Lo'ak kissed her temple, trying to let her know that there was no need to worry about him. "I'm right here, I'm sorry I was away. I let you down. I should have been here to help you with your nest. Look at this, you did it all by yourself, huh? Good girl." Lo'ak praised her, letting out a deep-sounding purr to let y/n know how impressed he was with her. Y/n nodded, smiling as she basked in Lo'ak's praise. "I did it for you, I wanted to be here when you got back..."

Lo'ak had to remind himself all he was doing was for the sake of helping y/n deal with how increasingly hormonal and emotional she was about to become over the next few days, and nothing that was saying in that moment held any real meaning. Somebody else would get to take care of y/n, and somehow he'd ended up on the council of people who got to determine who that person was going to be. As long as he kept his own feelings out of it, there was no reason why y/n shouldn't have stayed with him.

"Thank you, baby..." Lo'ak whispered softly and brought her hand to his mouth, kissing her wrist. "I'm going out to get you something to eat now, do you want to come? Or do want to stay here?"

"No." Y/n wrapped herself around him like a vine. "Stay."

"Huh-uh, it's like that, is it?" Lo'ak chuckled, powerless against her death-grip. So he took the opportunity to have a lie down. Unlike y/n, he was missing several hours of sleep. "Well, I'm not going to argue with the woman who has me in a choke-hold... and sleeping will do you some good too..." He sighed, resting his arms around her middle. It didn't take long for Lo'ak to pass out completely.

When Lo'ak woke up, y/n seemed to have been long gone. Someone had also brought him some food and water while he'd been resting. Lo'ak hurriedly ate something, before heading out to look for y/n, but he didn't end up needing to look too far. Moat had been in the middle of examining y/n when Lo'ak showed up out of the blue.

"Ever heard of privacy? Get out of here, skxawng!" Y/n yelled at him, and Lo'ak immediately did as he was told. At least y/n seemed to be once again lucid and back to normal. For the time being. And now that he knew she was alright he really didn't have any other excuse to be around her, so he left.

Lo'ak finally found the time to get back to his training, something he now did in private. It was embarrassing to perpetually remind the rest of the clan of his failure, and he would not ask his father or brother for help. His mother however, was a lot more difficult to get away from. And she understood more than most. "My son, it is clear you are hurting... we have not seen you for days... "

"So? What good is showing my face when I have failed you?" Lo'ak turned away in shame. He did not need anyone to look out for him, not anymore.

"Stubborn! Just like your father." Neytiri hissed at him, bonking him on his head with her bow and not too gently either. "It is clear... that Eywa made you and y/n to be together. Do not treat me as if I do not see. I see you, my son."

Lo'ak broke down as soon as he heard those words. It was true, he had been pushing his family away, but simply because he hadn't thought himself capable of facing them. What would his mother think of the twisted game he'd gotten himself in? What kind of example was he setting for his younger sister? He didn't deserve to be around any of them until he somehow managed to make things right.

Neytiri hugged him, even though it was something they hadn't done in a long time. She had immediately known how strong and independent her youngest son was from a very early age, and she feared that it may have been the reason why, out of all of her children, he'd most often been left to his own devices while she and Jake were forced to tend to the others.

"You have not failed us, Lo'ak. But you must still fight for y/n... and I will help you."

The next few days went by in a blur. If he wasn't training with his mother to successfully pass the Iknimaya on his second try, he was making sure to steer away y/n's parents from any candidates they may have seriously been considering to be her mate without seeming too obvious. If a certain potential candidate began to seem like a real threat to Lo'ak, then he would personally seek them out to politely dissaude them himself.

"If you ever try to talk to y/n, ke-he, you ever even look in her direction or... you just as much as think of her again, I'm dragging you out of your tent while you sleep and leaving you out to die in the forest. And trust me, the viperwolves will finish whatever meat the Thanator doesn't tear off your bones first."

The Na'vi might have been dangerous, but they were a peaceful people. Humans had been the ones to bring war upon them. And Lo'ak had begun to realize just how much of a scary breed he was of the two things. He was now turning on his own kind, on the very same members of his clan, his brothers and sisters. He was cheating and lying to get his way, just like a human would. And the scariest part was, that realization was bothering him less and less as time went on. Y/n's heat was approaching fast, and as a consequence, he was getting more protective and territorial by the day.

While y/n had been able to keep her head in the beginning, only going through a few 'fever dreams', as Lo'ak liked to call them, in a single day and quickly recovering from them, it was now rare to come back and find her to be lucid rather than not. She had a few lulls, here and there, where it was once again possible to get her to have a coherent conversation, but those instances were now few and far in between. Lo'ak would have to seize those opportunities to take her out so she could have a walk, drink or eat something, and show her parents she was still alive. One night he'd even managed to take her all the way out to the ponds for a swim, something she'd always loved, but she was way past that point now.

Y/n slept most of the days off; the nights were the real problem. Due to her body temperature slowly increasing to the point where it was eventually going to be unbearable for her, y/n had taken to refusing to wear any sort of clothing. Which was particularly hard on Lo'ak, especially since her body was also changing in ways that weren't so subtle. As much as he tried not to look, it seemed as if both her breasts and her hips were filling out little by little each day. By that point, he was sure it was some specific torture that had been crafted for him especially, but it all came to pale into comparison when most nights were spent treating the aches of y/n's fever.

"You need to drink some water for me, baby..." Lo'ak would try to encourage her. "I promise you'll feel a lot better if you do..." Y/n was struggling, and Lo'ak was thankful for the fact that after making a bit of a fuss she would eventually listen to him. He couldn't think of a single other person who would've had the same amount of care and patience to make sure she was eating and drinking regularly throughout her heat, and there was hardly any time left before she was completely under the influence. A decision was going to be made whether he liked it or not.

The only problem was that now, he didn’t know if he was going to be able to stand aside when the time came for her to leave. The two of them had gotten somewhat... close during their time together. Close in a way that Lo'ak was certain didn't apply to being best friends. Y/n had suffered a great deal the night her scent glands came in, two on her neck, two on her inner thighs, and one on each of her wrists, and Lo'ak had almost mistaken the event for the beginning of her heat. The sweetness of her scent had him so out of his mind, and he would have torn himself away from her if she hadn't been holding on to him for dear life. "Don't go, Lo'ak, please..." y/n had begged him through choked sobs.

Lo'ak still didn't know if he'd made the right choice to stay, because of everything that happened afterward. He peppered y/n's skin with kisses as usual, trying to bring her comfort, only this time the need to taste and sink his teeth into her was almost uncontrollable. "Y/n, I don't think I should be here..." Lo'ak tried to say, having never felt so at war with himself. Y/n shook her head and caught his lips in a kiss, completely tearing down any ounce of doubt he may have still had. For the time being. The fact that she was promised to another suddenly didn't matter anymore, and the two of them were painfully aware y/n had been dripping with slick from the moment Lo'ak had pulled her into his arms. They were all over each other instantly, reaching desperately for one another in the dark. The sound y/n made when he breached her walls was the most beautiful thing Lo'ak had ever heard, and they fucked so desperately, he was almost ashamed of it afterward.

Almost.

"I told you, my sweet syulang..." He teased, regretfully having to pull out of her for the second time. "You're not ready to take my— a knot, I mean..." Lo'ak kissed her whines away, only taking a few more strokes before coating her belly will his warm seed. "But I want to try again, weakling..." Y/n huffed, having absolutely no mercy for her spent companion as she climbed on top of him. Lo'ak let out a groan and a laugh at the same time, pulling her in for a hug. "You have come so many times, I am literally covered in your slick... and since you're clearly in the right mind to give me attitude..." he pinched y/n's ass cheek and she yelped, slapping his chest. "You're more than capable to come with me for a swim and... help me clean up all this later..." Y/n had bit him in protest but eventually complied with his unreasonable demands.

In those moments with her, Lo'ak had felt so happy he'd almost forgotten what the future actually had in store for the two of them. Even though now he knew y/n so deeply, both at a mental and physical level, another would be the one to marry her. Another would the one to make a lifelong bond with her, mark her and mate with her.

'Sometimes I don't understand how another can love her, is allowed to love her, since I love her so completely myself, so intensely, so fully. I grasp nothing, know nothing, have nothing but her!' Kiri had once read out those words from one of her mother's old books, since the ability to read and write in English had always been important to his sister. At the time, Lo'ak had made fun of her, saying it was all a bunch of boring nonsense. Now, those words haunted him. Every day. And here he was now, acting in the worst of ways just to hold on to y/n for just a second longer, have every part of her until the was nothing left for anyone else to aspire to.

When he walked into the tent that night, y/n was sitting upright and wearing a large white T-shirt Lo'ak had stolen from the RDA supplies. Lo'ak was happy to see she was doing her best to eat some fruit, and the awkward smile she gave him made him understand she currently had her wits about her. "Moat came by... she said it will happen tomorrow... and she gave me... something to help with the pain. Medicine, I think. She told me... my mate will have to take me away. I can't stay here with the rest of the clan while it happens, it might be dangerous-"

Lo'ak shook his head, raising his hands as he tried not to laugh bitterly at the sadness of the situation. How could she talk about it so calmy?

"I don't want to know, okay?" He tried to say as calmly as he could, but she could hear the distaste in his mouth.

"If you can't even talk about it, then admit what I've known all along." Y/n managed to say in a weak voice. "Lo'ak, I see you... I see you... everything you're doing for me, because of me..."

Lo'ak's ears immediately turned down at the sound of the words he'd been waiting for y/n to say his entire life. His immediate instinct was to shut her out. Now that he wanted nothing more than to say those words back, he knew he was only going to make irreparable damage. He'd justified the fact they'd been having sex in secret because it wasn't uncommon for their people to do so, nor forbidden. The only problem of course was that he and y/n were painfully aware of being in love with someone who couldn't commit to them. They had chosen to live in the most blissful of lies until their time together was up.

Well, that time was now.

"Spend my heat with me." Y/n said, not even posing it as a question.

"I can't! How hasn't that gotten through to you yet?" He asked angrily, hating himself for the way she instinctively flinched at his words. Lo'ak got down on his knees, kneeling in front of her. "Ngaytxoa." He asked y/n for her forgiveness. "Oeya syulang, you deserve to be with someone who has shown enough strength and honor to be part of the people... If we'd only had more time, I... but you cannot face your heat alone, nor will I allow you to tie yourself to someone who is not worthy. Who may never be." Y/n had begun to cry at this point, and Lo'ak could feel that he'd been joining her soon. "An outcast. Someone like me."

Simply put, if Lo'ak had spent y/n's heat with her, got her pregnant, and then ended up dying on the Halleluja mountains on his second or third attempt at his Rite of passage, not to mention the unpredictableness of surviving the Dream Hunt as well, he would have committed the cruelest act of all: giving his mate false hope before leaving them behind forever, all for the sake of getting what he wanted.

"You are... impossible..." Y/n cried. "You say these words, therefore you must believe I deserve to be with someone I do not love when I have already chosen the man I belong to and he has chosen me... do you not understand that would kill me just as much as being alone would? I know you went through your rut alone, Lo'ak... I know you went through that pain and survived, Moat told me. I am willing to take that risk, and wait for you."

Lo'ak looked into her eyes then, and it seemed to y/n he was having a realization. Had she finally gotten through to him? She knew her chances of survival were slim, and she hadn't exactly prepared, but after finding out Lo'ak loved her as much as she did, he would sooner risk her life to be happy with him in the end than choose someone else.

Suddenly he was grabbing her face and kissing her, pulling away just as quickly. "I'll be back by morning... there's something... important I have to do." Lo'ak saw the look of distress on her face as he stood up. In many ways, I would have been their last night together, and he was leaving. "Trust me, syulang, I beg of you. Nga yawne lu oer."

"I love you, too."

And with that, he was gone from her sight.

As he climbed the path of vines and rocks leading to the banshee rookery, Lo'ak wondered if anyone had ever managed to reach the Halleluja mountains past the eclipse in the dead of night. If that person, whoever they may have been, had been so desperate to have made the attempt even though everyone around them had said they were not ready, because it was a question of life and death for them as much as it was for him. After the initial surprise of having made it to the top, he was immediately aware of a dozen pairs of yellow eyes blinking at him in the dark.

Lo'ak immediately whipped out the yìmkxa, swinging it around a little as he cautiously walked amongst the ikrans. "Didn't mean to spoil your beauty sleep..." He said, counting how many of them had already flown away at the sight of him. "There's just one of you I've come to settle the score with, some motherfucker who threw me off a cliff the other day-"

A very familiar hiss came from out of nowhere and Lo'ak now knew he was looking back at his banshee. "Long time no see bro, I sure hope I didn't ruin any late-night plans." The ikran lunged at him but Lo'ak knew exactly what to do this time, and moved without hesitancy, muzzling the creature's mouth with the yìmkxa. "Me? Oh you know, my girl is going through the worst experience of her life--- shit, stop that, man--- where was I? Oh right, I'm supposed to be back home with her, yet I'm out here, dancing around with you. Bet you can't wait to get inside this head, huh? Hope you enjoy all the angst, you mother-"

With a final struggle and a minor chunk taken out of his leg, Lo'ak was able to make the connection. The ikran, his ikran, immediately calmed down and let out a pained sound, that Lo'ak recognized as being directed at him.

"Yeah, well... no worries bro." He sighed from exhaustion and patted the banshee's neck. "Now let's get out of here, I don't have all goddammed night."

By the early hours of the morning, Lo'ak had returned aching from the fight with the ikran and still disoriented from the self-induced high he'd given himself with whatever concoctions he'd found in his grandmother's hut to make himself find his spirit animal. No matter what anybody said, he'd completed his rite of passage and now he was going to tell y/n they could be together. Y/n however, was not where he'd left her. Moat found him soon after, and after reprimanding him for stealing her supplies and acting so recklessly, she told him y/n's parents had chosen Tholothian to be her mate and they had left not even an hour prior to Lo'ak's arrival. The Na'vi, much to his grandmother's protests, immediately set off to find them.

With the sunlight by his side and the ability to fly over the forest, it didn't take long for Lo'ak to recognize Tho'lo's ikran resting on top of a branch and its rider wandering the forest below.

"I thought I told you to stay away from her." Lo'ak snarled, quickly dismounting from his ikran.

"Stay out of this, Sully. The fact that you did the bare minimum this time, doesn't get you a prize." Tho'lo took a threatening stance against him. Lo'ak immediately noticed his bow and dagger were missing, and that he had a large cut across his chest. "Y/n was left in my care and responsibility-"

"She attacked you." Lo'ak accused Tho'lo, charging at him with everything he had the very next second. "What did you do?" He roared with a murderous look in his eyes as he held his knife to his rival's throat. "What could you have possibly done to her to leave you stranded out here, huh?"

"What I have done? What have you done, Lo'ak?" Tho'lo accused him back, sounding all too calm for Lo'ak's liking. "She has clearly chosen you, I see that now. I had known you two were close, but I never thought it went beyond you recklessly amusing yourself with her. I never would have accepted her parents' decision if I had known-"

"The why. the fuck. did she attack you?" Lo'ak growled, actively losing his patience by the second.

"Because she's in a heat, you moron. She won't be with anyone who isn't you now that the two of you have clearly done everything except maybe name your future children...I just wish someone had warned me, so I wouldn't have to be here right now!" Lo'ak stepped back from Tho'lo then, realizing he had just been assuming the worst of someone who was meant to be his brother-in-arms. "She attacked me not two minutes after we were in flight. I thought she was going to kill my ikran so I got us all down to the ground. She escaped of course, but I still couldn't leave her out here... "

Lo'ak nodded, ashamed of all the grief his actions had caused. But he didn't even have time to dwell on it, or make things right with Tho'lo, because y/n was still out there, scared and alone.

"I'm sorry, brother-"

"I'll forgive you when you find her and bring her home in one piece." Tho'lo cut him off, calling his ikran and mounting it. "And I know you threatened others just as easily as you have just accused me. That's what separates you from the rest of the people, Sully. You reek of anger and distrust, toward yourself and others. You are selfish, just like the rest of the sky people. Whatever y/n sees in you... must be the true reason why I'm still willing to call you brother."

After a few minutes of frantic wandering, Lo'ak picked up y/n's scent and it didn't take him long to track her down. She'd hidden herself in a small cave behind the waterfall, a place they'd both discovered once when they were out hunting. The closer he got, the more overpowering the influence of her sweet pheromones became. As he climbed his way up to the cave, mindful of the water cascading above him, he knew she could sense his presence too because she began to call out his name. Lo'ak could hear the strain in her voice and ended up cutting his hands and feet several times on the rocks as he made his reckless endeavor all the way to the safe haven she'd chosen.

He looked up to see her looking down at him, and he made one last stupidly dangerous jump to get her away from the edge. "Where were you? You told me to wait, I waited for you but- you are hurt!" Y/n reached for him, she was shuddering violently and unable to keep herself from crying. Lo'ak knew exactly what kind of pain she was going through, and he had to dissuade her from fretting over his wounds.

"I know, I'm sorry Oeya syulang, I'm right here now. I'm with you..." Lo'ak kissed y/n, making quick work of getting rid of whatever fabric was left to separate them. He let out a guttural sound at the copious amount of slick that gushed out of y/n simply from his touch. "Lo'ak, it hurts..." Y/n begged him, holding onto Lo'ak so tight he was pretty sure she was going to end up rearranging his bones.

"I know baby, you're burning up..." He kissed her neck, feeling how scolding her skin was as she lowered herself onto his cock, taking him all the way with a desperate moan of relief. Y/n seized up around him and coated him with a second wave of slick, high on the feeling of finally having her mate buried deep inside of her. "Fuck--you really needed me bad, didn't you baby?" Lo'ak groaned, unable to even comprehend what was happening around him anymore. Y/n's cunt was impossibly tight and warm, and she was making a complete mess on his lap.

His mate nodded and began to ride him in earnest, her stamina never breaking for a second. Lo'ak was so in awe, he could barely keep up with her. Their moans and whines echoed off the walls of the cave, and Lo'ak knew y/n was desperate to get knotted. "You need to... relax syulang." He kissed her face when she began to whine in frustration. "Might have to fuck you a few more times before your body is ready for me, sweet thing..."

"But I want--" Y/n was beginning to sound completely unintelligible, but she never once stopped grinding down on Lo'ak, challenging herself to take in deeper and deeper every time. "Such a good girl, look at that..." Lo'ak praised her, earning a deep purr which he happily returned. "Gonna make you a proper nest... so my baby can be nice and comfortable while I mount her later, how does that sound?"

Y/n curled up against his chest at the idea, kissing him deeply and coming on his cock for the fourth time since they'd started (yes, he was keeping count), and without much warning Lo'ak began to feel the his knot forming inside of her. She gasped and began to frantically fuck herself back against it, giddy on the pleasure the foreign experience was giving her. Lo'ak gave a a few more harsh thrusts, until his knot finally popped deep inside y/n's walls, binding them together. "Fuck, baby you can't keep moving anymore..." He groaned, blissed out and slightly amused by y/n's attempts to bounce up on his knot while she was stuck on top of him.

Y/n wasn't particularly shy about being loud, but the sounds she made when Lo'ak finally began to breed her made him want to fuck her all over again right at that moment. "It's... it's so much..." She sobbed, overwhelmed by the constant stream of warm cum that was now pouring into her. Lo'ak wrapped his arm around her and made a second connection between them, bringing their cues together. Immediately he could feel how close she was to climaxing again, and he reched down between them to rub her small bundle of nerves while she was still split on his shaft. "Going to cum on my knot, baby...? You're been such a sweet girl, taking everything I have to give you... once I'm done breeding you, your belly's going to be so pretty and full---"

Y/n gave out another high pitched whine and came thanks to Lo'ak's expert fingers. He managed to lull her to sleep after that, while they were still tied together and in the process of mating. Lo'ak found his sleep to be rather light, keeping an eye open for his vulnerable mate and growling menacingly at any noise he heard coming from outside.

When his knot died down he left y/n to get some much needed rest and set out to get everything they needed to stay in the cave for the rest of the week. He knew that his scent was more than enough to let anyone and anything to stay the fuck away from the cave, and that y/n would have been safe. Even though he'd returned with food supplies and other creature comforts to make a worthy nest, y/n was not too forgiving of his absence and jumped his bones the second he came back. After she'd deemed herself sated, they made their nest together, but it was hard to do anything without eventually getting distracted.

Y/n's belly was beginning to stretch out a little already from their activities and Lo'ak was completely mesmerised by the sight of his cum slipping out of her. So much so he could help but hold her down and get a taste. "Lo'ak... w-want your knot again..." she mewled, tugging fiercely at his braids while he drank down the sickly sweet taste of her slick.

"Oeya syulang, I haven't eaten all day, you can't blame me for wanting a taste... " Lo'ak growled softly before sinking his teeth in the scent gland on her left inner thigh, making her cry out. He soothed the wound with his tongue, lapping up her blood. "Now, you're going to have to behave for me a little, or I'm going to eat you out until you're a sobbing mess... understood?"

Y/n was a lot more partial to taking a break to eat and drink something after that. Lo'ak was not surprised when she feel asleep again, and he curled up around her on the makeshift bed they'd made, holding her close to his chest. He immediately woke up when she began to cry next to him a few hours later, not even thinking twice about mounting her from behind as her kissed her shoulders and reassured her everything was alright.

Y/n was the one to link their queues this time, moaning softly as he began to move. "Still hurts if I'm not inside you, baby?" Lo'ak asked, genuinely worried that the heat was still painful even though y/n was no longer facing it alone. Y/n shook her head and tried to find the right words to express what she was feeling, Lo'ak kissed her temple reassuringly, stroking her tail to soothe her. "J-just now... I think... I think I'm ready..." It took a little while for Lo'ak to understand, but then he felt it through their bond. Y/n was at the peak of her heat, and his next load was sure to get her pregnant. "You're happy..." she said, Lo'ak still forgetting that she could probably feel his heart soaring at that moment.

"Yeah..." He laughed, a little choked up. "Course I'm happy... so fucking happy" Lo'ak placed a hand on y/n's lower belly, firmly holding her there as he picked up his pace, pounding into her deeper and deeper. Y/n bared her neck to him then, submitting and asking him to mark her as his own. "Nga yawne lu oer..." He whispered before sinking his teeth into her scent gland, tasting the blood and sweetness there. Y/n cried out his name, feeling their bond deepen even more and the desperate need to mark Lo'ak just the same.

Both of them felt the exact moment when life began to blossom between the two of them when they were lying in each other's arms some moments afterwards. They were holding each other close and tending to the deep marks they'd left on each other's bodies. Lo'ak spent the rest of the night whispering promises and soft nothings to y/n, and she quelled all his anxieties about his wrongdoings or the fact that his child might have inherited his human features.

After all, she'd never cared for the right profile anyway.

[rudy-sport]

Warning: Rudy gets VERY sappy and a lot of people are abt to be tagged n told how radical they are IM SORRY THAT YOURE GETTING A STUPID NOTIF LIKE THIS

So the past.... Month. Has been very eventful. Coping with a rough break up, work being hard. I'm almost 21 I kinda figured it'd be rough being in my 20s. I really was expecting it to be the end of the world, but then I made a really good choice.

I joined a few discord servers over this month, and I can't begin to explain just how wonderful that's been for my mental health.

I've made so many new beautiful friends who just mean the world to me, and those new friends along with old friends and my beautiful angel wife who's stuck with me while we both heal, it's just nice.

I wanna say a few words [or a lot words. I'm a yapper] and I jus wanna really detail my appreciation for the following people.

@your-pal-smoochins, my perfect angel wife. You and I have had a lot of things against us. You've been such an amazing support system through these past couple years and I don't tell you enough just how much I love and appreciate everything you do for me. You lift me up when I really need it and I've never felt more loved than when you've been by my side. Thanks for being my rock, my sun moon and stars, and just thank you for being mine. You do so much more than you give yourself credit for, having escaped the situation you were in and going to college. You're so strong, and you're my beautiful angel forever.

@carbonateddelusion Rox! You were one of the first friends I made when everything got locked down and my first memory of you was drawing some of my guys. I dunno if you know but those gifts are still in my phone. I look at those and your newer stuff and I'm just beyond amazed at your progress. You've been a really amazing friend and I love you, man. You really rock, rox [yes that was on purpose]

@toondamien Damien!! one of my very first tumblr friends and the guy who lets me use his oc for my story stuff! You're a little older than me, and as such you've kinda been a role model to me. I still look up to you [metaphorically, hehe] and I'm glad you're my No. 1 DSAF mutual. You're great, dude.

@springlucked Spring. Though we only started talking recently, you are still someone I consider a dear friend. Your fics got me out of some really bad art blocks and my really low days. While Dearly Detested makes me cry and fills me with just the right amount of emotions to break a tree in half, you are so awesome. Your writing is so good and you're so humble when you get gift art from people regarding your fics. You are like a slightly bothersome little sister and for that I love you, ya lil punk.

@dexabite Dex Dane Dexabite Freakabite Miller Jekyll Jade [not real name. obviously] my sworn enemy /j. Your art rocks. Your art inspired a lot of my more detailed pieces and your character design stuff actually made me wanna branch out more not just with character design, but also poses and colors! You're an inspiration to this guy who mainly draws that dumb orange boy and ily /p

@igottoo MJ!! Like if I was a second person! You rock dude. Your art? slaps. Your animation? slaps. Your insane jokes? Slaps. you unintentionally gave me a pose reference that made me leap out of my comfort zone and yknow what? People loved it!! And thats because you're so cool! We scarily have a lot in common so the reasonable assumption is we are in fact the same guy [silly] but i love you to BITS /p. My lagomorphed brethren and the guy I'll be sending my Dave doodles to before showing the public. You're a bro, dawg. As the No. 1 Old Sport fan I'm VERY glad I'm best pals with THE No. 1 Dave Miller fan.

thank you all for being my friends. You guys make my heart full and make me wanna keep working towards being a good person

[crappy-writings]

WIP and Ideas List

Main Masterlist | My Fics | Recced Fics

So, I have a few ideas, but don't know which ones to focus on. Figured I'd put it up for a vote. I've always been bad at summaries, but below are the concepts, let me know which ones y'all would be more interested in :D

Most of them are Marvel because apparently my Marvel brainrot never left

WIPs

Keeper of Shadows | Wanda Maximoff x Reader | Series

(Series) Summary: An odd series of fatal attacks in Upstate New York piques your interest, especially when they seem to be related to the strange powers you received when you were 10 years old. By some stroke of luck or misfortune, the Avengers too are investigating the case, and you are their number one suspect. In a temporary alliance, you work together to discover why people are dying, unraveling a line of love, secrets, and betrayal.

Masterlist link is here!

The Run and Go | Natasha Romanoff x Reader | Series

Summary: You, an ex-Red Room graduate turned mercenary, take up an assignment to retrieve some sensitive information from the Triskelion. You run into Natasha as you escape, much to your anger. You can’t seem to escape her after this first encounter as different circumstances force you to work together.

First part is here!

Those Were The Days | Monster Hunter!Natasha x Monster!Reader | Medieval Fantasy AU

Idea: Maybe they were a monster hunting duo and reader gets bit. Instead of telling Nat, they just disappear and Nat thinks the reader died. Few years later, Nat takes up a contract to kill a creature that’s been stalking a local town. Nat tracks them down and is about to kill the creature until she realizes who it is. Fic is placed in medieval-ish times. Unspoken feelings, some angst. [This was supposed to come out on Halloween but that didn’t pan out. There will be a vampire version and a werewolf version with 5 endings total].

Link to an early draft here!

Ideas/Prompts

Marvel

Little Bee | Hope Van DynexReader | Fluff Oneshot

Summary: Sparring with Hope was fun. Teasing her while doing it was even better.

Late Night Shots | Ronin!Clint Barton x Barton!Reader | Angst Oneshot

Summary: You mourn those who were lost to the Blip, including the ones who are still around. [Or Clint takes off shortly after the blip, leaving behind the only surviving Barton child, much to their anger and resentment.]

Sick Fic | Natasha Romanoff x Reader | Oneshot

Prompt: You're sick and don't want to tell Nat. She still finds out and takes care of you when you can't. It's kinda angsty, lowkey, but also really simple, and it's halfway written.

Pitfalls of Devotion | Natasha Romanoff x Reader | Miniseries maybe?

Prompt: Follow-up to "Orpheus and Eurydice." It's not fully thought out, but its sort of supposed to be a parallel to the myth, going after her, maybe in the soul stone somehow and trying to get her back? Maybe, probably, end in angst?

Night's First Star | Wanda Maximoff x Reader | Fluff Oneshot

Prompt: You were told that the first star in the night sky will grant you a wish but you have all you could ever wish for with her.

S.T.R.I.K.E. Out | Steve Rogers x Reader | Oneshot or Series

Prompt: A Captain America and the Winter soldier fic where the reader is a STRIKE agent that’s not in Hydra and is helping Cap out. The elevator scene is where the reader finds out everything is wrong and stays in the strike team to get more info. After the mall scene, the reader gets found out and is captured and lowkey tortured. Hydra send in the Winter soldier to get more info out of them but instead, he asks about Steve and why Steve knew him. The reader tells him about how they were best friends and stuff and bucky does the “he used to put newspapers in his shoes” but he’s horrified cuz he finds out his whole existence as a hydra “agent” is a lie. [Or basically a slow-burn reader insert of Captain America and the Winter Soldier]

Untitled | Avengers x Reader | Oneshot/Mini series

Summary: You've gone rogue, having left the Compound in the middle of the night and no one knows where you've gone. You return a few days later and call for a meeting despite the heavy injuries you have.

Untitled | Kate Bishop x Reader | Angst Series

Summary/Prompt: After Eleanor Bishop's mysterious death, Clint and Kate begin to investigate, finding ties to the not-dead King Pin himself. [Or a spy-thriller type fic where everything will go absolutely wrong]

Untitled | Matt Murdock x fem!Reader | One-Shot

Prompt: Matt, for all his skillsets, doesn't realize his next-door neighbor is also a vigilante. [Basically had a stupid idea of the reader coming in at around the same time as Matt to their apartments and the reader smells of blood and they are denying it by blaming her period or something, idk]

Untitled | Daisy Johnson x Reader | Mini-Series

Prompt: You, an Agent of S.H.I.E.L.D., have been on an undercover mission at a Hydra base, reporting on a secret project they have been working on. After one of your calls is intercepted and are made out, Daisy and the team work to get you back. [Basically the Whump troupe again, sorry, it's one of my favorites]

Prompt: Would love to write a spider-person!reader but have no idea what story I'd want to tell nor who to write it for.

Prompt: Would also love to do a choose-your own path type fic, but also have no idea what the story should be or who to write it for.

Star Wars

Prompt #1: Reader is a pilot squad leader. They lost their entire squad on their last mission and is, naturally, heartbroken. They have to write letters to their families and tell them that they’ll have no bodies to mourn. They’re taking it out on a space punching bag or somethin’ until they collapse and they scream. While trying to catch their breath, two hands reach from behind them, the hands feeling so familiar. The hands pull the reader back gently and the reader sinks into them and grip onto the person holding them. [Don't have an era nor a character in mind, tbh]

I'll take care of you. | ReyxReader | Oneshot

Summary: Rey gets hurt after a scavenging trip to one of the Star Destroyers deep in the Jakku desert. You promised to always take care of her.

Prompt #2: SW fic where reader was part of a shut down trial where they implemented chips similar to what happens to the clones in the prequels. Reader defected and joined the rebellion. The chip is somehow activated and reader starts attacking the rebels but is trying to fight the programming from within. [I was picturing either the originals or sequels era]

The Walking Dead

Prompt: Takes place during and/or after S3 ep7 and reader is working a lot harder cuz they feel guilty about what happened to Maggie? Idk, I started rewatching the show recently and was reminded of my huge crush on Maggie. Anyways, I'd like to write something zombie apocalypse but don't have any ideas, so.

Most of these ideas and prompts aren't fully thought out yet, but I'd work on them as I'd go. Anyways, thought I’d put these out there, so let me know what y’all think!

[allur1ngs]

about nim

lengthy post below so i'm putting all my thoughts after the cut

as i'm sure you've all seen by now, yet another once-beloved bada writer has been exposed as a minor. this time, it's someone i've privately and publicly interacted with, so i feel the need to make a statement.

coming onto tumblr as a minor is not a crime. it starts to become an issue when you flirt with adults who are multiple years older than you and are under the impression that you are also an adult. not only are you lying to their face, but you are violating their trust, and ultimately leaving them with a feeling of guilt, disgust, and self-hatred. what you do is harmful, end of discussion.

even now, i struggle to find the words to describe how heartbroken and disappointed i am. nim, if you're seeing this--which i doubt you are--you lied to so many people. you gained their trust and spun a web of complicated lies to cover up your deception. the account that was sending you hate months back couldn't possibly have been the one that sent me and my other friends hate, right? no, obviously not! and not because she's in jail like you told me, but because as everyone had secretly thought, you sent that hate to yourself.

yesterday, you told me that you were thinking about leaving tumblr because you were so "busy" and "don't know what to write anymore." now i think i know the truth. you'd been silently watching eli expose other liars and got scared of being found out, so you went radio silent and left at the first sign of conflict. and your "apology" is pathetic. you don't care about the people that you hurt, nor the effect of your lies on this community. all you care about is that you got to write fics and flirt with adults before getting exposed.

...was it fun while it lasted?

on a personal note, this has severely affected my motivation to write, and my feeling of safety in this community. although i've said in the past i would be happy to become friends with anyone, i don't think that's the best decision, at least for now. i'll keep the friends that i've spoken to, and protect myself and them for the time being.

from now on, if i continue to write, then that will be the main focus of this blog, and less so this flirty and silly atmosphere i have created. i no longer want to leave room for this to happen again.

lastly, i want to say a big thank you to @badasgirlfriend for once again bringing this to everyone's attention. if you hadn't, we'd have no idea that we were all being lied to and deceived by someone we all trusted. from the bottom of my heart, thank you so much. i truly hope you don't receive hate for this like you did last time, you don't deserve it after everything you've done for this community.

[shiguangism]

Presentation

Hi, I'm anchestral and I'm mainly a fan writer who landed here on tumblr after years of being active on twitter!

Some info about me:

Pronouns: she/her

Age: 22

Languages: Italian, English and Spanish

Fandoms I'm active in: Link Click, Chainsaw man

Favourite shows: Link Click, Chainsaw man, Jojo's bizarre adventure, Tokyo Ghoul, Haikyuu, Berserk, and many others I won't list here. Just fyi, name me a show and probably I've watched it.

I've moved here because twitter was not a comfortable place for me anymore, and I've seen that tumblr is much more chill wrt those lands. Please, be aware that I will NOT engage in any kind of arguing online, so don't even bother to pick a fight with me, I've had very BAD experiences I don't want to repeat.

I'm here just to chill, talk to people about my favourite show, share insights and maybe make some friends. I'm very friendly, if you want to hit me up in the dm to talk about something, I'll answer very gladly whenever I cant! :)

If you're shy you can send me anon, I'll be very happy to answer.

Fanfictions:

In this year I've been writing a lot, I've always liked writing and I started when I was only 14. However, I'm a bit slow because I like to write first in my native language and then translate in English. Below, there is a list of my fanfic profiles and the works I like the most and I'm writing. This are my profiles for AO3 and EFP (Italian platform for fics):

AO3: Anchestral

EFP: Anchestral

Link Click Fanfictions:

Immersion: In which Cheng Xiaoshi goes back into the past to save Lu Guang

Summary: ‘Three are the rules we need to respect: first, we have twelve hours; second, listen to my instructions and don't change anything; third, leave to the past what's in the past and don't ask about the future.' Cheng Xiaoshi knew them well, Lu Guang told him those rules everytime before working. By then, he learned not to question them, they didn't know what could happen playing with the past and modifying it. But did the rules still make any sense if Lu Guang was dead?

Prevision: In which Lu Guang goes back into the past to save Cheng Xiaoshi

Summary: Lu Guang did not make mistakes, he always evaluated all the possibilities in front of him rationally, it was what he had to do to allow the survival of both of them, to allow their time travels to go as smooth as possible, but letting himself be dragged into Cheng Xiaoshi's do-gooder madness had been the first big mistake of a long chain. September 12th 2020 was the day when that realization hit him like a sucker punch straight in the center of his chest, leaving him on the floor gasping for air, in pain.

These two fics are actually related!

火锅 - Hotpot (E-Rated): Just a collection of nsfw one-shots, but it is getting serious. For now, there is only one chapter out, but I'm working on the second and it is becoming huge.

There are many ways to spice up a relationship: may it be a hot bowl of noodles, a dark room with way too red lights, or a bet on who's going to wash the dishes for the rest of the month... The possibilities are endless when starved eyes are looking at you as if they're going to devour you any time soon, leaving you feeling naked and in trembles. ----- 5 times Cheng Xiaoshi and Lu Guang have steamy, hot sex + 1 time they can't. (the formula may be subjected to changes)

Chainsaw Man Fanfictions:

Dancin' in the devil's hand (E-rated):

Summary: The metropolis of Tokyo is torn apart by a series of unexplained, brutal murders, but all of them seem to be connected by a single thread. In this climate of terror, Aki Hayakawa has been given the onerous task of bringing light and a point to this story. --- An unexplainable mystery to solve that will lead Aki and Angel to work together, closer than ever, and maybe will give them the chance to understand something more about themselves and each other...

There are also many other one-shots, most of them are in Italian, thought, and I'm not particularly fond of the other translated because I was still trying to adjust my writing again!

I think I've said everything. I'm sorry if I make some mistakes, I'm very new to this site and I'm still trying to understand how the netiquette works, especially the one tied to the reblogs and the tags.

See you around! :3

[kentopedia]

hi rylie,

talking about safe space.. lately, since i switched blogs, i've been having some mixed feelings. While I feel more at ease and comfortable, i can't shake off this sense of being an outsider? like i'm standing on the sidelines while all the other writers interact, already familiar with each other. it's giving “new kid” energy, hahaha but i've been trying to make friends, so it doesn’t just feel like i’m logging in, dropping a fic, and bouncing.

any advice? i’d really appreciate your input if you have any thoughts.

HI JESS !! sobbing bc i had a whole long response typed out and then it got deleted by tumblr, my number one opp. this is really long but hopefully it's helpful in some way!!!

i'm so sorry to hear that you're feeling like that :( i know that ur feelings are coming from moving blogs, but i think that's been the general consensus on here (at least from my close moots/friends). that many people feel like an outsider. it's been weird on here lately, and while this is kind of a cliche thing to say, more people feel similar to that then you'd think <3

but i can def give you my advice on how i made friends !!! i'm honestly pretty shy so it took me a while, but everyone's different when it comes to interactions. how i started out was just by talking to and following people who had reblogged my fics. sending a "hey thank u so much for reading" or even just a little question to break the ice really helps. i tend to be more talkative to people who send me asks first, but i know that's not the same for everyone bc some do have friends they already stick with and don't really branch out :// some of my friends i've randomly dm'd and started a conversation with if i feel like there's one to be had and they're open to that.

i will say my easiest friendships came from giving people my discord, if you have one. personally i'm more comfortable with 1 on 1 conversations, so i just offer it up to any of my mutuals (which, i will def give u mine if you want it hehe). and if they want to chat with me more, then they can !! but servers are another good way if you do better in group chats. i know some people don't like dm's and would rather just talk in a server. personally i've had some bad experiences and i also know i will never talk in them, so i tend not to join them. but i know many people that really like them and/or networks bc they are more outgoing than me LOL. and also, they can share their fics and it makes it easier to circulate them and get support! but yeah, don't feel like you HAVE to join them to make friends, i think that's a misconception on here.

don't be too hard on yourself though, i was the same way for a while as well. sometimes i still feel like all i do is drop fics and the random personal life story and dip LMAO. being perfectly transparent, it took me probably 6 months to find a mutual i still interact with today, and a year to find one i would consider my friend! i think a lot of people really pretend on here, but of all the mutuals i talk to on a somewhat regular basis, every single one of them has told me within the past few weeks that they feel like they don't fit in here. which, i do not say that to be discouraging but instead to be like i PROMISE it's not you at ALL. and honestly, within the bsd fandom, there's only a few people i really interact with. everyone's superrrr nice (for the most part), but it's tough to make close friends in that fandom ><

okay but also i saw u were doing kinktober and i think this is a great time to get interactions !! i gained so many followers and started talking to so many people during this time last year, so i feel like you will have good luck with it :))

[penncilkid]

Hello hello! My name is PK and I'm a fervent enjoyer of non-canon ships. I'm not a fic writer exactly but I've been told "Where's the fic OP" twice now by my friends. So I thought I'd format one of my fic-adjacent ramble sessions for Tumblr!

Pairing: Milo/David [No Sweetheart or Angel, wanted to go easy on myself] [MDNI*] [Let's call this "canon reminiscent /lh]

Word Count: 3.2 K

*(I wouldn't consider this smut by any means but there's a few lines that make me want to add this as a tag)

[As a reminder, I diverge from canon quite a bit with this. This is just one route I could see leading to Milo and David getting together]

My vision for this pair is that they start getting closer in a more than just friends way a little bit after Gabe dies. Not immediately because have some decorum, but it would start during that transition period for David as Alpha. Asher is trying his best to help but is also grappling with the whole Beta thing, so he feels like he's in a complex position. But him and Milo can see that David's not doing great so Milo's like "Fine, I'll bite the bullet" and tries to confront David about it.

At first it's subtle, asking David if he needs help with something, if he wants anyone from the pack to stay after for meetings, if he wants them to pick up a shift so he can have the day off, etc. But David is too stubborn to accept any of it so he keeps brushing them off. This ends up culminating in a "fight" one day where Milo again tries to make an offer that David shoots down. Milo sort of snaps and is like "Alright, what the fuck gives? Why are you acting like you're too good to get help anymore, David?" David says he doesn't know what he's talking about, Milo calls bullshit. It doesn't turn into a screaming match but it's enough of a heated argument that Milo storms out of the den.

In the days following, Milo either calls out sick, switches shifts with people, anything to avoid seeing David. David brushes it off, thinking he's got more important things to worry about if Milo's going to throw a fit. But of course, Ash being Ash means this stuff can't fly for long, so he tells both David and Milo that he needs help with something at an odd time of day and then "coincidentally" doesn't show up. When Milo gets to the den, he's real tempted to get back in his car and leave. It's a mix of still being a little frustrated with David and being embarrassed that this "fight" has gone on for as long as it has. He walks up to David (who was waiting outside for Asher) and is like "Lemme guess, you're waiting for Ash?" "How did you...?" "Fucker told me the same thing."

They do some lighthearted bitching about their friend, which eases the tension. There's a bit of silence and right as Milo gets ready to apologize for speaking out of turn, David apologizes first. He acknowledges that Milo was right in what he said and that he's been struggling with everything changing, but he hasn't wanted it to show on the outside. Milo makes a light jab at David, "Alright well did you really expect that to go over my head? C'mon, David, we've known each other since we were kids. Gimme some credit" To make up for it, the two of them go out to eat, all that's chill. Cut to when Milo gets home, maybe has a drink or two as he's winding down. David sends him a message, confirming he made it home alright (because I've always latched onto the idea that he's super attentive to that given what happened with Gabe). Milo sends David a quick reply and wonders why seeing that message made him feel some type of way (romantic? Who knows, not Milo that's for sure /lh)

Now if I remember correctly, the audio where Angel learns about Gabe, it's been around 3 years since his passing. Keeping this in mind and in the spirit of being canon reminiscent, I think around/after this point is when Milo's feelings for David start to really bubble up. They've been building for awhile, much to his dismay. He's trying to play it cool, but his heart's in his damn throat any time David touches him casually or whenever the two of them are assigned to a job together. And he knows it's getting bad enough where he might lose focus, so he swallows his pride and does what he's been avoiding for months, if not years: asking Asher for advice.

"Alright, look: You and me both know that you had a lil crush on David when we were in high school. How the fuck did you get over it? I'm drowning, Ash." If this conversation is happening on the phone or at Asher's place, cue him yelling to Babe that they owe him 20 bucks (because it's funny to me <3). Asher asks Milo why he wants to get over the feelings so bad and Milo's like "'Cause this is David we're talking about." "So what?" "We've got... history. That complicates shit all on its own." "And?" "....Alright fine, and I'm also terrified he's not gonna feel the same. Happy?" Asher is being the little shit that he is, putting his arm around Milo's shoulder. "Listen. If I know David— And believe me, I do— What ya gotta do is be direct. If he doesn't feel the same, that's one thing. But if you even want a chance, you gotta be straight up with him. If you tried to ask him out casually, he'll just assume you're being friendly because that's what you are right now. Friends." Milo takes all this in and is like, "Nope, just gonna shove these feelings down for eternity." "I'll tell Marie—" "I will beat your ass." He knows Asher has a point though. Any idea Milo might've had could be easily construed as them just chilling as friends. But he doesn't really act on anything for awhile.

Now, before we get into the next phase of this, some added backstory: David had a crush on Milo growing up. I'm thinking a little after high school (won't say college necessarily since I don't picture them in college but like, young adulthood phase). He'd always found Milo incredibly attractive and found his boldness admirable in general. David was constantly thinking about what he had to do for others and how to make the pack look good (since he was the Alpha's kid then the pack Beta). Milo always felt incredibly refreshing to be around. But he figured Milo would never be interested in because David's just himself so he eventually got over it. Cut to that argument him and Milo had a few years back. He remembers that night when they made up because dinner had been fine but all he could do was focus on Milo. It felt nice to just hang out with him without the pressures of being Alpha. And he enjoyed listening to him talk about anything because he always had a strong opinion. I think around then is when his past feelings awoke again but there was a new obstacle: He was the Alpha of the pack. It wasn't like before, things were different. He'd never have a chance to pursue Milo without feeling like he had pushed Milo into a corner somehow. So again, he tried his best to push his feelings down, appreciate and value the friendship he had with Milo and leave it at that. It was enough to just have Milo in his life, even if it wasn't going to go any further.

Back to how these two end up together: the Moonbound Solstice. They're all at David's place, everyone's having a good time together. Milo's chilling, talking to someone from the pack when Asher cuts in and is like "Sorry, just gonna steal him for a minute" "Ash, you can't just— AY okay okay I'm coming" They walk off, somewhere far from the kitchen to minimize the risk of David overhearing. In hushed voices: "Alright, so what's the plan?" "Ash, what the fuck are you talking about?" "Milo, it's the Solstice. This is the perfect time to make a move." "Are you out of your damn mind? This is the last place I should be hitting on— On you know who." "What are you talking about it, it's perfect! The whole pack's here, no one would even notice." "Look, he's already got his hands full hosting the Solstice at his own place for a change. I'm just gonna chill and enjoy the night for what it is." Asher is pouting as Milo walks off, immediately thinking of what he can do to help nudge David Milo's way. (Unhinged alt route: Ash giving Milo a flat so he has to stay the night)

Cut to the end of the night, people are heading out and whatnot. David is subtly trying to get people out because he loves his pack but his senses need a break. Asher (+ Babe, package deal) and Milo offer to stay and help clean, and David lets them since it's only a handful of people. Milo's keeping his cool, vibing to the much lower playing music when: "Babe, what do you mean you have a work call you need to take tonight? Can't it wait?" "Sorry, Ash, I need to be home in the next twenty minutes" "Alright. Guess we're heading early." Milo thinks nothing of it until he makes eye contact with Babe. They smile with a sickeningly sweet wave. Those bastards. Before Milo can try to rope Ash into staying somehow, the two of them are gone.

When Milo and David are alone, Milo tries his best to focus on the task at hand because feelings or not, he's not gonna do a shit job at cleaning so David has to clean up after him. Once the bulk of it is done, David mentions that he needs to grab something from upstairs or maybe says he's going to go change out of his clothes (I imagine he put on something better looking but not as comfortable for the solstice). Milo's chill with that, getting his keys, phone, other personal belongings together. He happens to slip into the kitchen though, stealing a bit more of the food David had made for the solstice. While he's stealing (said with love), he hears very close to his ear: "You can take some home if you want." He nearly punches David, gripping his arm as he tries to slow his heart rate. "You tryin' give a guy a heart attack, Shaw (/lh)" because he legit didn't hear David come back downstairs. "Maybe if you weren't busy trying to steal some food, you would've heard me— Greer (/lh)." Milo rolls his eyes with a grin and there's a moment of quiet when he realizes his hand is still on David's arm.

He lets go, clearing his throat, confirming that it's actually cool if he wants to take some of the food home with him. David says sure, giving him a container to fill (or Milo takes whatever the food came in, not sure what I'm picturing David's cooking set-up to be). David walks Milo to the door (as a good host does) and the two of them talk in the doorway for a few minutes about upcoming jobs, responsibilities, all that formal shit. There's another quiet moment as the two of them watch each other. Inside, Milo's like "Alright, no one else is here. This is as good a chance as any." The second he gets ready to ask David out on a more proper date, David instead says "Good night, Milo" and essentially closes the door in his face. Milo stares for a moment before cursing himself in Spanish (my HC), walking to his car and muttering about how "Of course he was just being polite, what the fuck were you thinking?" On the other side of the door, David is groaning into his hands, face warm as he tries to calm down because he came way too close to making a move on Milo.

Intermission (Wow, you're still reading? Damn /pos): I wanted to think of how to push them closer to a confession before they actually get together and eventually settled on "sickfic shenanigans". Insert deliriously sick Milo whose phone died and he can't find a charger for the life of him so David goes over to his place to check on him. Initially, he's trying to get David to leave because "I can handle myself fine". But that doesn't last long because admittedly, he feels like shit and has been for the past 12 hours. The dynamic quickly turns into Milo convincing David to stay then being so sick his filter is hanging on by a thread (/lh). "Why do you have to go rush off so fast?" "Milo, I have a pack to take care of—" "First off, I'm part of the pack— (cue Milo coughing) And second, they'll be fine without their Alpha for a few hours." Milo's playing it off as lighthearted but David can tell he doesn't want to be cooped up inside alone on top of feeling like shit physically. A little later, when Milo's on the verge of falling asleep (as many do while sick), he's like "Y'know, it's fucking wild you don't got a mate, David. Like look at you. Doesn't make sense" David laughs at first, thinking Milo's sick delirious (which he is, but that's affecting his filter, not the validity of his words). He's like "ay, why are you laughing, I'm serious. Look— if I were ya mate, I'd treat ya right. I'd cook, I'd work extra hours so I could see ya, I'd make sure we're the best dressed wherever we go— not to mention, I got a great dick." David writes this off as Milo being sick and spewing nonsense but never forgets the words. Meanwhile, Milo (after getting over the sickness) is convinced he dreamt saying any of that to David.

Back to the present, David's been a bit stressed with work as of late so Asher suggests the pack take a trip/weekend vacation. He says he'll handle figuring everything out, letting David take a backseat this time. They go somewhere, a resort, a hotel, something that involves people having rooms they're staying in. Everyone's having a good time, chilling all day, night rolls around. David's in his room when he realizes he forgot to pack something— can be anything. Toothpaste, a charger, something for his hair, the specifics aren't important. He texts Asher, asking if he has the thing he forgot and Ash is like yeah. David asks Ash which room he's staying in, Ash texts him the room number. David leaves his room, goes there, knocks and waits patiently. Door opens, and who's standing there? Milo, shirtless and in the middle of brushing his teeth or some shit.

David's checking his phone to see if he went to the wrong room but nope, numbers match. "Asher must've made a typo. I just needed to borrow something from him." "Well, what did you need? Maybe I have it." Before David can leave, Milo's busy ushering him in, closing the door so he can finish brushing his teeth before finding what David needs. They're making idle conversation, talking about what they spent their respective days doing. While Milo's talking, David's kind of staring at his back, not processing a word he's saying. Milo turns around and notices and is like "What? Don't tell me there's a bug on me and you didn't say shit? (/lh)" and David is trying to think of a good cover up. Milo tries to lighten the mood, says he's just messing with David before going to find whatever David's looking to borrow. He finds it, hands it over when for a split second, his eyes land on David's crotch. David leaves shortly there after but all night, Milo's like "...That was a boner... why the fuck did he have a boner?" But again, Milo's mind is like "Nah, I'm reading this wrong somehow."

Now, I'm painting a picture: it's the next day, Ash, Milo, David, few others from the pack plan on doing something together while on the trip. Asher gets there a bit late but is somehow on time compared to David, who shows up minutes after (that man was up all night pining). Ash notices Milo's not here yet and has a devious idea (as always). He asks David to go check on Milo so they can go. "Why me?" "You were the last one here, it's only fair. Now shoo." David rolls his eyes but goes, getting to Milo's room, knocking. He can hear Milo's definitely inside because he's cursing and complaining. He knocks again before the door swings open to reveal a mildly disgruntled Milo Greer (my vision is he's in pants and a white tank with his name chain. The in between outfits outfit).

He asks what David is doing there, David explains that Asher sent him to pick up Milo, Milo's like "What time is it— Jesus fucking Christ." The issue at hand is Milo can't find an article of clothing that he swears he put in his bag. He's been trying to get by with alternative options but none of them look the way he wants them to, which is making him quietly lose his shit. David stifles a laugh, to which Milo lasers in on. "And what do you think you're laughing at?" "You haven't changed since we were kids, that's all." Milo scoffs but admittedly, the sentiment puts a smile on his face. Almost immediately after that moment, he finally finds what he was looking for (tucked under something, irrelevant right now). He starts to get ready, pulling his shirt on, buttoning it up but let's say a button or two is fighting him for whatever reason. Without a second thought, David walks up, buttoning it for Milo. Milo's having an internal moment as a result, staring at David's hands then his face. David finishes and looks up to catch Milo staring. He clears his throat, saying something about waiting in the hall when Milo catches his wrist.

"Can I take you out on a date?" "What?" "I don't know what or where yet, but I just— I know this is probably stupid and I'm shooting myself in the foot here, but Asher's gonna kick my ass if I don't do something so— Can I take you out on a date, David?" David's taken aback. "Wait... so you were serious. That time you were sick. All that stuff you said about being a good mate for me." "THAT WASN'T A DREAM?" Cue Milo letting go of David's hand and nearly cursing himself out, running a hand through his hair because now he's mortified. "I can't believe I actually said all that shit to you—" "Did you mean it?" "Huh?" For the first time, David's not looking at Milo like a friend or pack Alpha. The look in his eyes screams pure, unfiltered attraction. "Yes or no, Milo." Milo's face is hot, "Course I meant it. I'd treat you great if you gave me the chance to show you." David steps closer, gripping Milo's face gently and tilting it up towards his. "Show me." Milo grins before pulling David down to him, the kiss they shared far better than the ones he remembered from spin the bottle games they'd played as teens. This kiss felt deeper and closer than that could ever compare. The moment they break away, gasping for air, Milo's busy unbuttoning his shirt. David asks what he's doing, to which Milo replies "I'm about to savor as much time with you as I can before I have to see Asher's smug face. Unless you'd like to explain how your hair became a mess between the time you left to find me and when you get back?" David laughs before pulling Milo to him again.

So yeah, that concludes this fic adjacent ramble (/lh)! I love rarepairs and rambling, so if people enjoy this, I may format some other rambles as they arise. I think I've got some Sam/David tucked away somewhere, so let me know. If you actually read all of this, wow, okay, thank you (/lh /pos)

[stop-breaking-my-heart-telltale]

Hey CJ 👋 I hope you’re doing well in life.

I’m on the same page as you, when it comes to taking a step back from TWDG & the fandom. And, coming back to the games after sometime & seeing it in a different light. Some things that didn’t click with you back then, makes a bit more sense now.

Also, I’m curious.. what are thoughts on true colors? Steph & Ryan? 👀

Hello, my friend! 👋 Been a while! But yeah, I'm doing fine; a lot of the usual work with writing fic and blog posts in between.

Yeah it's funny to step away from a fandom you're so engrossed in for so long, like twdg was such a huge part of my life back in 2018-2020 with me running this blog, writing fic, and streaming. Now I'm just in a completely different headspace in general, and looking at the games now, they're still amazing but my reasonings are different. Also I talk about the comics a lot, which isn't something I would've guessed I'd be doing. If you go back to when they were announced, I made posts being like "yeeeeeah I dunno if I'm gonna read them :/" jokes on me. I read them multiple times, I need to make that useful haha.

As for LiS True Colors, I actually super loved it?? way more than I ever did the first LiS game?? though I think I might've loved it for the wrong reasons. I don't know, I haven't actually looked into what LiS fans thought of it compared to the other games, but for me it was a "perfect time, perfect place" game in the moment. To me the whole thing was nearly a perfect escapism game; the music is an A+, the entire town is gorgeous and covered in flowers and woods, Alex gets to live in a nice apartment for free [the true fantasy], there's a whole LARP campaign to play through, a flower festival where I've never been so conflicted on who to give a rose to, and overall just the coziest vibes. I swear, I spent most of the game just wandering around the town looking at all the flowers, it was great.

Like if Gabe didn't die and True Colors was just about Alex moving to this fantasy-like small town and working through her issues with the help of her powers, I would've been 100% on board. I didn't mind the mystery, though I totally guessed Jed would be the twist villain given the first episode immediately presents him as a hero who saved a bunch of people in the mines, I was like "Oh did he now... mmhmmm mmhmmm and he's Ryan's dad, oohhh he's gonna be this game's Jefferson-" except he was done better than Jefferson imo. He didn't turn into a cartoon character and his motivations behind the cover up were interesting. He didn't do it for the aesthetic like Jefferson did. And in the end I got everyone to side with me, except Charlotte because I told her to take the money so she wanted to speak out but couldn't, which was honestly fine with me like take their money, send Ethan to college, we'll stab Typhon just fine without your vocal support.

I liked most of the characters, except for Diane and Mac, though I reluctantly disliked Mac less by the end... Diane can suck an egg, though. I don't think I've ever wanted to throw a character out a window more than when Alex came back all bloodied with a bullet wound on her head as she exposed the truth and when she asks why no one's saying anything, Diane just goes, "We don't want to embarrass you" kjlkajdslkjalkjdl LADY DON'T PISS ME OFF

As for Ryan and Steph, I liked them both, trying to choose between them was absurdly difficult. It was like True Colors saw how easily I picked between Louis and Violet and took it as a challenge to create Ryan and Steph specifically to stump me. I mean, soft boy who loves nature, goes out of his way to be kind and helpful to those around him, has a slow build up to being emotionally available with someone he trusts, and has some daddy issues? A girl with pretty brown eyes who loves DnD and LARP, has a passion for music and will deflect with humor, who knows who she is and is eager to help those around her, and who isn't just another rehash of Chloe? They knew what they were doing; they dressed Steph up in as a witch after having Ryan act like a goof acting like enemy creatures, they were made for me.

Having done both routes, I do prefer Steph. I adore her and Alex together, but Alex and Ryan are super cute, too.

It's not a perfect game and there are issues in the writing but honestly, I don't care. I had a good time. I was engaged. I looked at every single flower and kissed a pretty girl so good that the world exploded. What a great game.

[cx-boxbox]

Tag game :D

Tagged by: @wisteriagoesvroom!

Who is your favorite driver? Oscar and Lando first and foremost, Max, Guanyu, and Alex because they're funny and they have cats, Yuki because he loves food.

Do you have other favorite drivers? I'm on the fence about Logan because on one hand, he seems nice but on the other, he reminds me of too many guys I went to high school with. (The fishing hobby doesn't exactly help either.)

Who is your least favorite driver? I am a hater at heart, but I don't want to be crucified, so I'll just let whoever stumbles across this post wonder.

Do you pull for drivers or do you like teams as well? I didn't want to attach myself too much to a team in case the drivers I like leave, but sure, McLaren, you've somewhat charmed me, and you're faster now, so.

If you like teams, what team do you pull for? See above.

How long have you been into F1? HAH since mid-January.

What got you into F1? This tiktok of George reacting to potential intro poses, NONE OF WHICH WE ACTUALLY SAW SMH, and then I fell down a rabbit hole of F1 memes. If there's one way to hook me, it's memes. I've made a fair few myself, and if you've seen one that goes "people be like 'good night everyone' but then *insert screenshot of ao3*" floating around tumblrdotcom, that was unfortunately me.

Do you enjoy Fanfic/RPF? No. Absolutely not.

How do you view new fans? I feel like I'm still a new fan. Like, yes, I can explain DRS to anyone who asks, but I still feel like an imposter.

If you could take over as team principal for any team, who would it be and why? Brother uehhh (sorry). I'm already experiencing enough hair loss, thank you. Although, now that I think about it, I could be rich while experiencing hair loss... nah, nobody can pay me enough to babysit men.

Are your friends and family into F1 as well? I told my sibling about F1 when it was still just a budding interest, and they were like "you getting into F1 was NOT on my 2024 bingo card"... and, plot twist, now they're also into F1, and their favorite driver is Carlos. My mother also enjoys it enough to send me memes, like the one depicting the Ferrari pit crew as Smurfs during the Miami GP. My partner sadly doesn't Get My Obsession with F1, but they did immediately rate ZGY a 10, so that's good enough for me.

Are you open to talking to other fans/making friends? Yeah! I'm terrible at approaching people, though. Aside from sending a couple anonymous compliments to writers whose fics I've especially enjoyed, reaching out to other users sometimes feels like sending a professor an email, which is to say it's terrifying, but I'm definitely open to talking. And after I warm up to someone, I fear you'll never stop hearing from me. Ki and Wiz can confirm.

Whoever sees this and wants to play, go right ahead!

[lwtqts]

no because that eunseok fic is relating a LITTLE TO WELL to my life..... okay a little storytime ONLY IF YOU'RE INTERESTED ‼️ okay so this girl i became friends with the beginning of freshman year decided to turn her fucking back on me out of no where, so its the ending of sophomore year for me rn and in January she had started to become distant and i didnt mind because yk maybe she was going through something and wanted to be alone but mind you i kept asking if she had a problem with me or something because yes i am an overthinker okok 😾☝️and I skip right to conclusions anyways she starts making our entire friend group distant from me (except for two girls whom ive known since literal diapers) anyways i start to get uncomfortable because wtf she used to be so nice and a girls girl until one day she snaps at one of the two girls and starts calling her names and telling her to fucking move on from a guy my friend was talking to at the time which mind you that girl shouldn't be talking because shes still obsessed with her ex from FOUR FUCKING YEARS AGO 😭‼️‼️anyways that day she made the room hella uncomfortable and that day going home from school something didn't feel right and that's when i get a message from her asking if we can talk and i answer her right away cause fucking finally she spoke up about her attitude anyways she starts going off on me on how terrible of a friend I am, that I'm a bitch who makes everyone uncomfortable, I'm judgemental and opinionated and that I bring nothing but bad energy to everyone in my life and I was just sitting there in disbelief because wtf and not to toot my own horn or anything but I am one of the nicest people I fucking know 😭 I have gotten so many compliments from those around me on how I put others first and how I radiate mother energy, and how i put my own problems aside to take care of those around me and yes I will admit i am the mother of the group and i am proud to be that 🫡N E WAYS she would quite literally like the guys I liked or his BEST BEST friends and try to get with them 😭👎 and would always judge everyone but if you told her something she'd be mad and make you apologize like girl !?!? anyways me being the bigger person I apologize for those dumbass reasons and there we unfollow each other and that's it but I wake up the next morning to MULTIPLE messages from this girl talking about how if I was to talk shit id do it to her face or that i need to shut my mouth on social media, GIRL THE WAY I WASNT EVEN ON SOCIAL MEDIA BECAUSE I NEEDED A BREAK FROM IT TO RETHINK ABOUT THIS GIRL AND HER INTENTIONS THE WHOLE TIME WE WERE FRIENDS AND SHE PULLED SOME SHIT ASS LIES FROM HER ASS AND KEPT ACCUSING ME 😭 what's so funny though is that she was the one talking shit on me on social media but as I was realizing this I get a text from one of the two girls and she sends me a screenshot of all the shit that the girl was talking behind my back, FOR 2 MONTHS SHE WAS TALKING SHIT ON ME WHILE ALSO PRETENDING TO BE MY FRIEND 😭😭 AND THE BEST PART ABOUT ALL THIS IS THAT SHE IS GOING AROUND PAINTING ME AS THE FUCKING VILLIAN DUDE 😭😭😭 AND SHE LITERALLY SWITCHED OUR FUCKINF ROLES AND SAID I WAS THE ONE TO FUCK EVERYTHING UP LIKE HUH !?!?? since it's been months of that happening I catch her ass glaring at me and STILL spreading rumors about me but almost everyone in my school knows I'm so sweet and I've known a majority of those people since kindergarten and that girl just moved to that school so 😭 honestly I just continue to let her bark because I don't like problems with anyone and I like to be the bigger person 😓 also she turned the friend group on me by convincing them that I was talking shit on them which I wasnt and now only those two girls talk to me! lol sorry for this long ass storytime I was just thinking about how yunjin is sounding a little TOO much like this ex friend of mine 😭😭 if you want more details I have PLENTY GIRLLL like the tea is boiling over!! okok tyyy 💗 (I love your work smmm but eunseok pisses me tf off in that fic 😞🤞)

BRO WHATT😦😦😦😦

im literally mouth open what the actual fuck, i hate people like this fr like what the fuck is their problem. i had a friend like this too which was at the beginning of the year and she started talking shit on me bc of a guy who i happened to like too BUT i didnt know she liked him because she never told me, and she started talking shit on me and making me look horrible saying shit like im a pick me girl, i need male validation and attention, but girl i literally did NOTHING to her but like this guy and be friends with him, i confronted her later on and she shut up real quick admitting that she was jealous of me. ugh but i hope you find better friends soon ! because from what i know, people who talk shit on you who happen to be your friend are jealous. but like if you ever need someone to shut that girl up rq, dm me because no way in hell is she gonna get everyone on her side nuh uh🙅‍♀️🙅‍♀️

[c2-eh]

*pokes head out of hole for affection* 💌

(mutuals send me a 💌 and i will tell you all the reasons i love you)

hi wifeyy <33

i don't really know where to start this one, because there is a lot i love about you ngl. i've been sitting on this for about 20 minutes, because i don't wanna miss anything but let's get started.

i still remember (and i told you that already but sh) when we weren't talking and i always saw you reblogging my posts with the most hilarious tags. or serious and very clever ones and i wondered who the hell is this person i wanna get to know them. and then you put the most outrageous thing there and i was like NOT ON MY WATCH. guess that's what started our journey.

i love how kind, friendly and nice you are to everyone, but also a little menace that will leash out when you see something you don't like (or just for no reason at all). you always find a time to ask me how i am, what's new or anything, really. you care and that warms my little heart every time. you listen to me ramble about stupid, silly or delusional topics, but also never run away when i need someone to talk about serious stuff too. you always give me a word of advice and even if you don't have one, you try to cheer me up. that means a world to me and i appreciate it a lot. i should tell you that more often.

you're my partner in doing crimes (subtle crimes... or i think they were lol). you make me feel safe and i know i can trust you, because you are my friend and lovely person to be around.

i love your humour. it's unique, but also corny at times, which is the best combination ever. you made me laugh probably billion times, since we started talking and it's always with something new. be it a meme, joke, you being dramatic, me being dramatic and you making fun of me. name it, it probably happened.

your comments on my fics were my lifeline back when we didn't talk. you always had the nicest words for me and i still cling onto them when i wanna cheer myself up. i miss it lol.

i value your opinion a lot, because you're so smart and intelligent. you study and tutor and help people around you. you work so hard and do so much for others without expecting anything back, which is a proof you have pure and big heart.

your writing is so good and i love to read everything you write. you really are talented! and your web weaves are also soooo good i love them!

you. are. phenomenal. singer. i cannot even find words. when i first listened to you singing opera i ascended to heaven. you have a voice of an angel and i am your biggest fan !

okay this is getting too long oops sorry. i hope everything in your life turns out perfect. you're a strong woman that is going through life like a champ, no matter what it throws in your way. i hope you're always happy and i love you so much. mwah <3

[what-if-nct]

(this is sneeze, i changed my mains layout and also i figured i didnt need to use anon mode because everyone knows who i am anyways-)

awwww your new profile picture is adorable!!! I love those idiots so much, when Shotaro called Xiaojun 'sunbaenim' and Xiaojun told him not be so polite I love them

I'm afraid im getting off kpop even tho Mark will always have a special place in my anus heart. I love that guy he's amazing. And adorable. I love the way he laughs at stupid shit because same. He has worsened my humor. I'll always love NCT and SHINee and Stray Kids (although i have drama with all three fandoms xD) (not everyone tho, but most online friends who're stays turned out to be toxic as hell, but well who knows do they think like that about me). Changbinnie will always be my cute little pie.

(Striped part in next paragraph contains gore)

I bought rangers apprentice and the tgcf books and i am obsessed. There even is a month for my favorite ship which is FengQing (Feng Xin x Mu Qing) which is January and I've participated with writing. I literally loved writing those stupid little drabbles. Mu Qing canonically has a habbit of rolling his eyes and its hilarious. Also theres this guy who literally eats bodies and hangs them in trees to fucking look cool and hes my favorite character help-

How have you been? I wish i had more words to send you except my stupid obsessions, I want to be a good friend, really. Please be okay, alright? I dont know why I say this but I'd always like care for you because you're too sweet. Sorry I'm sorry for not coming here often, I really am. I love you so so so much!!!

-sneeze

YOUR HEADER EXCUSE ME I LOVE ITTTT

Also someone commented on my first ao3 fic and I'm so fucking happy right now they were so nice help I'm gonna cryyyyy

Yes, I love Taro and Xiaojun so much it's the cutest picture of anyone ever! The header I had to I said Yuta's belly button piercing will return one day. Today is that day. Understandable. The kpop fandom is pretty toxic which is why it's just important to create a circle of people who you feel comfortable talking to and are chill and get you. I only really had one close friend who was into kpop. I have like three now! (Sorry I'm so annoying and suck at typing) And of course all of you guys! And honestly Stays kinda scare me. So I'll just be in my Stayzen corner. All other Stayzens please join. And that sounds like really cool. A little scary but cool. And im fine I did cry last night and this morning but I'm fine just had an issue with my hair. I had put in extensions the way I usually do it which is how it is on Instagram I think we follow each other there. But my aunt's friend wanted to fix it for me but she did it way to tight and I took it out last night and the front got pulled out from how tight it is. And I was so sad plus I don't like the color I dyed it red to match the extensions and I don't like it and I'm fighting the urge to buy green hair dye. Cause green will neutralize red. But I have to fade it first so it will get to a color I can dye over. And it's been a whole kerfuffle. But I'm fine. I'm a Leo so I'm dramatic over my hair. I'm okay. And thank you for caring about me. I have a horrible mindset of no one cares about me so it's nice being reminded there's people who do. I love you too. I hope you're doing well and you're having a good day.

[teecupangel]

Anon from last night:

Nah, I was not the anon who asked about a kink with Basim*.

I would send in a fic prompt about top!Desmond and bottom!Ezio but I have no actual ideas atm, it’s just a concept in my brain, but if I think of something I’ll send it.

If I could send a gif to convey how I felt about your smutty!headcanons it would be a gif of the end of the Actual Cannibal Shia Labeouf Music video, when Shia give the one person standing ovation. *chefs kiss*. (I forgot to mention that altdes is also my ac otp last night). Everything that you put down I picked it up and was like ‘yes yes good’ and put it in my pocket like a shiny rock.

*ok, so like, to be honest (and adhd over shared mood activated), I haven’t played very many ac games. I’ve only completed ac1, and I played half of ac4 and then watched my brother beat it. I have watched other people play bits and pieces of other games, but I honestly know nothing about the newer games. That being said, I did in fact read your Desmond #destroys Basim fic and it was very very good, #goodsoup (why am I in an old memes mood today oof). I really liked how you did the whole Desmond (clone? Half?) and his Ancestors thing that was really good, and kinky and nice.

Mmm, one more thing before I go! Thanks for letting me know about the whole won’t post an ask if you ask thing, it’s really good to know! (I don’t….. need that for this ask, unless you just don’t feel like answering it🤣🤣🤣🤣).

Take your time with your prompt, nonny :)

Hahahaha, I'm glad you enjoy my headcanons. I had fun writing them.

Yeah, I can understand why some people don't play all the AC games. Honestly, AC wiki is a good site for summary (and TVTropes too).

Since we're sharing our AC games experience (long rant ahead), the first time I played Assassin's Creed was at my best friend's place and she just gave me the controller and told me to whack people with a broom as Ezio while... I think we were waiting for her printer to finish printing our report or something? I don't remember anymore, all I remember was my main idea of Assassin's Creed before was that I can whack guards with a broom that sounds like a freaking hammer. We were in college then and I was a pure 'JRPG' purist back then so I was really confused by what this game was supposed to be. I know it was related to Prince of Persia in some way and the only reason why I know about Prince of Persia back then was because I watched my brother play all the games on the PS2. How times have changed, hahaha. Anyway, it would be a couple of years before I even actually play AC1 and AC2, then half of AC Brotherhood before dropping it, only coming back like maybe 3 years ago to play the entirety of Syndicate and its DLCs because my childhood friend suggested I would love the Victorian-era setting (I did) and I've been buying AC games either 2nd hand or when it goes super cheap in PSN as they've been part of my backlog since my best friend was a huge fan (she stopped playing after AC3 though XD) so I have all of them just gathering (digital) dust. The truth is, I finished AC Brotherhood to Valhalla only like... last year. From September last year to January this year, in fact. While it's never too late to play the other games, I'm not going to tell you to play them if you don't have the time or if there are any games that you want to play more. I do believe that if you can't play a game, watching let's play (with or without commentary) is an okay alternative and sometimes you can let it play while maybe grinding on the game you're currently playing. (just, FYI, all of the AC games except AC1 are available for free if you are subscribed to PS+... I think the 2nd tier at least? Ezio's Trilogy to Valhalla is free in PS+ as far as I know.)

Anyway, back to the Basim fic. Thank you! I really enjoyed writing about Desmond (considering the narration calls the ancestors 'shades', I think it's okay to call him Desmond's shade as well) and his questionable relationship with the other shades.

No problem! And I like answering asks so, yeah, I'm posting this hahahaha

[papurgaatika]

Are you going to answer my ask or you so self righteous that you hide behind posts and think you can get away with your performative activism?

Don’t worry I’ll ask it again.

How can you claim support Palestine and all your Joel fics includes an author's note about TLOU and Neil Druckman being a Zionist but you still write for Joel? Palestinians have said that that doesn't cancel it out and have said people should stop writing TLOU fanfiction. Other writers who have the same stance have completely nixed writing for Joel. How come you don't? /gen

Hi friend! I’m sorry that you felt like I was ignoring your ask, I can assure you that I was simply thinking of how to reply with good intentions and a clear mind.

I’d like to first address the fact that you think I’m self-righteous. I can promise you that is truly not the case and that that’s kind of a crazy accusation to tack on to saying my activism is performative. My writing for Joel includes my author’s notes with resources on druckman’s zionism, along with donation and boycott resources, it isn't just a one off statement so that I can continue to post. My activism, both in acknowledging the zionism in the second game, and in my personal life, is not performative to my knowledge. I've been active in trying raise awareness for Palestinian liberation since I was at least 13, so almost ten years now. I find it a little bit insulting that you're trying to insinuate that I'm only doing this for?? recognition??

I haven't stopped writing for Joel because I haven't ever been told I needed to stop. I'm not actively promoting the new season of the show, the remaster, or the second game, because that is what actually gives neil money. However. I am always open to being educated and working on bettering myself, so if you have any resources or posts about people talking about why writing for tlou is problematic, please go ahead and send them my way.

Lastly, and this is a personal point, you're being aggro for no reason. I leave anon on because I'm also shy and have definitely used it to send things in, but you sending me two of these asks in the span of 24 hours and being, quite frankly, antagonistic about how you go about it is not a reasonable way to expect change from people. There are many ways to have conversations with people, this was one route, but I can promise you, there were better ways to do this.

Anyway, you're welcome to send me resources or posts in my DMs if you wish, or you can put them back in my asks.

Peace and love from me regardless.