#also i woke up like after 6 and my eyes have been burning all day yeet

[going-to-ikea-for-the-fries]

Three. Four. Five. || Toxic!Husband!Price

For @glitterypirateduck's “O, Captain!” writing challenge! I used prompts:

30. "I hate you but if anything happened to you I'd burn the world" vibe.;

42. The story spans over a period of 10 or more years;

78. Give us a "That's my Wife!" moment.

Rating: E Words: 3.3K cw: toxic couple, VERY toxic, insults, death wishes, smut fade to black, pregnancy. Tags: f!reader, you/your pronouns but no Y/N, miilitary/court martial inaccuracies, very bad family dynamics?, dark humour??. Summary: John and Reader are in the worst fucking marriage ever. A collection of moments, dialogues and scenes from their terrible relationship. a/n: They are SO fucking toxic and dumb, I cannot- This is also very different from the stuff I usually write. This is ALSO not particularly angsty, more so dark humour.

There was a time when you loved John Price.

With all your heart, all your soul (and all your pussy).

That time was when you were young.

Ages 14 to 21, you loved him. He was your first kiss, your first time. High school sweethearts, you supported him through the academy, he supported you when you went to university. 

You stayed together through his first and second deployments. It was like an old-timey WW2 romance. 

So many letters exchanged back and forth. All lovey-dovey, with faint pen ink and smudged blotches on the pages as you made plans for the future.

Phone calls with spotty service and loads of static, only five minutes per soldier, 5 minutes which he’d spend only ever spend talking to you, asking you to relay any other messages to his mum, dad, siblings so he wouldn’t have to hang up with you. 

Polaroids clipped on the inside of envelopes which he would then slip into the breast pocket of his shirt, keeping you over his heart… one he’d often pull out and look at during transpo, thumbs tracing your eternal smile.

Polaroids of yours, a bit more risqué, which he would keep tucked into a journal under his pillow, for his eyes only.

John would walk around overseas with a smile on his lips after getting a letter or a call from you, brag to his teammates about his “bird back home”, never going out to bars to find one night stands like they did…

But sometime after his second deployment and joining the SAS, the puppy love that had lasted for years started to dwindle. 

Slowly but surely, you found that you were both growing distant.

You assumed you were both growing a bit ‘comfortable’, perhaps complacent… like all relationships tend to get after a while. 

By that time, John and you had already moved in together and you were no longer consistently alone for months at a time waiting for him to return from deployment. You blamed it on that. Plus, you’d been together for years by then!

But it felt different. There was distance, emotional and physical. Whenever he cuddled up to you, you felt cold and so did he. The kisses to your forehead were meaningless, the dinners at home eerily silent.

And between the distance and the inability to make proper plans, proper dates, celebrate milestones together, forgotten anniversaries, overlooked birthdays… It turned into arguments. 

And one argument turned to three, to five, to seven… hundred.

You found yourself growing bitter, angry, hateful.

It wasn’t a sudden shift or anything.

Not like you woke up one day and the one thought in your head was “I hate him”...

But you remember hating him longer than you ever loved him.

You tried breaking up. And failed. 

Some… bastardised feeling of guilt came to the forefront of both your minds at the idea of throwing away 5 6 7 8 9 10 years together, and giving up on your first love… and maybe even fear of having to start anew with someone else.

So, you simply continued going through the motions. You got engaged, big shiny rock on your finger, all big smile, but no tears came when he proposed. Your families were ecstatic, not quite able to see through the thinly veiled deceit.

For the wedding, you pulled out all the stops, stressed yourself out preparing the ceremony and reception with the women in your family (and his! His mother and sister were so happy that John was getting married!), going wedding dress shopping…

You had a beautiful ceremony, John wearing his full dress suit, army green, with the beige SAS beret. You were both 27, and together for 13 years.

Then, came the honeymoon, which was cut short. Not that it was a true honeymoon. Just three days in a coastal town in Northern France, having to be within a day's drive of Hereford lest he get called out for a sudden mission, which he was.

Not that you expected any different from him. So the distance continued growing, as did the arguments.

You hated him. He hated you.

Then came the predictable “So, when can we expect some grandkids?”. You put it off for a couple more years, blaming it on your high-priority careers, the law and the military, so similar and so different; his lack of time at home and how regrettable it’d be for you to be alone through the pregnancy; the want to be ‘more present’ for the future kids, needing to wait for things to settle down a bit more…

You’d been together for so long at that point, 15 years under your belt, starkly aware that neither of you is going anywhere. The world keeps spinning and your relationship hasn't ended. Fuck it, might as well go for it.

And now here you are.

It’s been eighteen years since you met. Aged 32, you no longer have arguments, you have throwdowns. You pull out every weapon in your arsenal. Neither of you plays nice.

Insults are traded often. Death wishes even more so. And, more often than not, they’re delivered with such a deadpan nonchalance that you’re sure people would think you both psychopaths.

“Going on a mission. ‘ll be back in a few days.”

“‘Kay, hope you die.”

“So do I.”

-

“Just had a fender bender with a stupid bloke. The car’s at the shop. Taking an uber to the base to get your car.”

“Okay. Shame you didn’t die a fiery death.”

“Don’t remind me, already cried about it.”

-

"I'm getting discharged."

"Why?"

"Shot."

"And it couldn't have killed you?"

-

“Can you get out of the damn toilet? I’m bleeding.”

“Period, accident, or just part of your satanic rituals?”

“Period.”

“Tough luck. Hope you bleed out.”

It never gets physical, never violent. John would rather die than lay a hand on you and you’d never DARE lay one on him. It’s just a lot of yelling, a lot of insulting, a lot of throwing things around, and, especially, a lot of revenge plans being executed to drive each other crazy.

Like recently. You found out John had gotten a grey-haired wig about the same length and texture as your hair, and has been snipping off a few hairs at a time, planting them around the house to blame you for leaving your hair everywhere, while simultaneously making you feel like you’re going grey. So, you put grey hair box dye in his shampoo and beard oil, to make him think he’s going grey.

Or three months ago, when you replaced all your lightbulbs with dimmer ones and lowered the brightness on all electronics, to make him think his eyesight was starting to go bad. You drove him so mad that he had voluntarily signed up for sniper assessments because he was worried he’d become a liability for the team.

Or eight months ago, when John had to return home in the middle of the day wearing a ruined uniform and just about ready to blow smoke out of his ears, having ripped holes in the uniform midway through a meeting all because 2 or so weeks prior you had painstakingly undone part of the stitching on it after an argument, and that had resulted in him baring his hairy thighs and armpits to a boardroom full of officers.

It’s bad. Very bad. You’ve had your windows and doors insulated to make sure the neighbors don’t hear your screaming matches and call the cops on the “domestic violence” happening next door. 

You probably shouldn’t have kids with this man. And yet-

He drives you insane.

And you’ve TRIED to fix it! You did. Marriage counseling, rage rooms, axe-throwing, paintball matches, yoga, meditation.… Nothing worked! In fact, it only infuriated you more because:

“You’ve got a tactical advantage, you need to play with a handicap!”

“Tough luck, sweetheart. Get good or get shot!”.

-

“You can throw harder than that.”

“Oh, I’ll show ya throwing hard, you gobshite!”

“Okay, when are you planning to start?”

-

“My back hurts-”

“Because you’re getting old.”

“Fuck you.”

“I’m just telling you the truth. Face it, John, if the downward dog hurts your back, then you’re old.”

-

“Can you breathe any louder?”

“Yes, I can. Wanna see?”

“Just shut up. I can’t hear myself think.”

“Not much to hear either way, pretty hollow in there.”

“I hate you.”

“Feeling’s mutual, sweetness.”

There are only three occasions when you’re not actively at each other’s throats. Other, then, of course, when John’s working, especially when he’s overseas. You can’t fight if he’s both a) not home and b) unreachable via calls or texts or e-mails.

When you need a favor from the other, something you can’t quite do, or that falls in the other’s ‘jurisdiction’ in house chores.

“The washing machine’s leaking.”

“Turn off the water main, I’ll go check in a sec.”

“Mkay.”

-

“Here. Popped a button.”

“I don’t have any more army green thread.”

“Then use brown or black or whatever.”

-

“Where are your car keys?”

“What for?”

“Going to get it washed and detailed.”

“My purse.”

-

“You’re not gonna wear that, are you?”

“Why?”

“Besides the fact that it’s wrinkly? That’s a ‘house’ shirt, not a ‘going out’ shirt. Wear this one instead.”

2. When you’re both complaining or dealing with an outside force, a 3rd party, together.

"Excuse me, hi, I'm sending this back it's not cooked the way I asked."

"Ma'am that's exactly what you-"

"Are you calling my wife a liar?"

-

“Oh, fuck no. Why the fuck is he winning the Great British Bake Off?"

"Hm? Oh- oh! Yeah, why the fuck is he winning?"

“Bloody hell, he rolled his pastry too thin and had watery pie filling-”

“Wankers. This is not fair.”

-

“John. John!”

“What?”

“Look-”

“Blood hell, he’s back early-”

“Yeah and her boytoy’s car still there. They’re definitely still going at it.”

“Oh, this is going to be fun.”

-

“Excuse me! Hey, excuse me! Pick up after your bloody dog! NO, don’t you start with me, you keep leaving your dog’s shite right by our garden, don’t you see the sign my husband’s posted up?! Pick it up or I’ll do it and then drop it in your garden.”

3. During sex.

Marching into the bedroom after breakfast, you find John combing through his hair in the bathroom mirror. The room is steamy from the hot shower he just took. 

“Take your trousers off. I’m ovulating.” You warn him as you wave your phone in the air, showing off the period tracking app.

“I literally just showered.” John replies as you’re already shrugging off your robe and pajamas.

“Well, believe or not, I don’t control my ovaries, John.” You reply. “Now take your trousers off.”

“Already on it.” He replies as he already starts taking off his shirt and sweatpants, leaving them on a pile on the floor, before his boxer briefs follow suit.

His hand palms his cock as you’re getting comfortable on the bed, tugging on it lightly as he watches your fingers do the same between your legs. 

“Can we try to enjoy it this time?” He asks you in earnest.

“Sure.” You reply simply. “Been a while since we’ve had proper sex and not…”

“Not a breeding session?” He quips as he kneels on the bed between your parted thighs. His hand replaces yours and he starts rubbing your clit for you.

“Shut it…” You quip, while your own hand wraps around his cock, stroking it slowly. John lowers himself onto you and his lips slowly brush against yours before he kisses you.

No, as it turns out… There are actually four occasions when you’re not actively at each other’s throats:

4. The Kid

In a day like any other, you’re lying in bed, reading a book. It’s a lazy Sunday morning, your big, round belly feeling particularly heavy. You’ve stolen every other pillow in the house to try and find some comfort, which you fail remarkably at.

“I think I’m going grey.” John states to no one in particular.

He’s in the en-suite bathroom, applying beard oil across his mutton chops like he tends to do, about three times a week.

“You are.” You remark in a bored, dismissive tone as you read a book in bed.

“That’s not funny. I’m not that old.”

“You’re getting up there.”

“Look who’s talking, we’re the same age.”

“What’s that supposed to mean, Jonathan?”

“It means you’re there yourself, darling.”

Raising your eyes from the book in your hands, the bottom of which rests atop your pregnant belly, you cock a brow at your ‘beloved’ husband.

“And this is coming from Santa Claus?” You retort swiftly.

John peeks his head out of the bathroom door to look at you. “You think you’ve got a leg to stand on, you crone?”

Grunting under your breath, you glare at him, and he glares at you, complete silence in the bedroom. 

There’s something in that face of his, the look in his eyes, those STUPID fucking mutton chops that you’ve told him to shave and he refuses…

Grabbing your book and rolling it into a cylinder, you hurl it at him, putting as much force behind your arm as you possibly can. It misses the mark, but only because he had the presence of mind to duck. 

“You’re such a fuckin’ knobhead!” You insult him, tongue dripping with bitterness.

“Wel, not like I can be anything else, really, when I’m married to such a raging cunt.” He retorts.

“OH FUCK YOU!” You retort.

“ALREADY AM MORE THAN FUCKED, SPENDING THE REST OF MY LIFE WITH YOU.”

“OH, PLEASE, YOU’RE MORE MARRIED TO YOUR BLOODY GUN THAN YOU ARE TO ME!”

“YEAH CAUSE AT LEAST MY GUN DOESN’T DRIVE ME FUCKING MENTAL!”

“OH PISS OFF!” You shout, your face twisting with a scowl.

“You know, you really shouldn’t be stressing yourself out like this. It’s not good for your blood pressure. Or for John Junior.”

“First of all, it’s not gonna be a boy. Secondly, even if it is a boy, we’re not naming him after you. And thirdly, how about you die, then I won’t get stressed.”

“And why would I do that, when I can stay right here, perfectly alive and healthy, and watch you give birth to John Junior, and have the pleasure of rubbing a ‘I told you so’ right in your face?”

“Oh fuck you. It’s not going to happen.” You sulk and cross your arms over your chest, leaning back against your mountain of pillows.

“Someone doesn’t like the idea of having a son that takes after me, hm??” John teases as he comes up to the bed, a brow cocked.

You trail him with your eyes as he sits next to you on the bed. “Absolutely not. I wanna have a child I actually am able to love, and not one that I have to lie to.”

“A mother’s love knows no bounds, huh? What a load of crap.” John quips.

“Oh, that’s 100% true. I love this baby to bits already, but if it takes after you… I’ll probably die.”

“Good.” John remarks, causing you to roll your eyss. “Much better than if our child takes after you. Spawn of Satan, he would be.” John’s hand slides up your leg and slowly cups your swollen stomach.

“I should probably address the fact you just called our child ‘Satan’s spawn’, but I’m more concerned over the fact you keep calling the baby a ‘son’.” You murmur as you uncross your arms and watch him caress your skin.

“I feel like it’s a boy, I don’t know what to tell you.” He replies as his calloused fingers drag over the stretch marks and linea nigra on your stomach.

“What if it’s a girl?”

“What about it?”

“I’ve seen enough men online getting pissy over havin’ a daughter.” You quip and cock a brow up, looking him in the eyes.

John’s eyes lock onto yours. “Not me.” Then they return to the belly as he continues rubbing you. “Would love a little girl too.”

“Hm.” You remark and slowly, your hand rubs over the belly on the opposite side, where John’s hand isn’t. “We’ve gotta promise not to yell or argue in front of the baby.”

“Kind of hard to do that when I’m married to the Devil.” John quips, causing you to look up at him, eyes narrowed.

“You’ve gotta promise. We’ve gotta promise.” You murmur as you look at him.

For a moment, his usually grumpy face softens and he nods. “I promise.”

Nodding as well, you echo the sentiment. “I promise.”

No, wait, five:

5. When you have his back.

“General, that is not what I asked you. I would ask that you stop beating around the bush, feeding me, the jury, and the people watching at home, fabricated information and embellished words in a sorry attempt to save your credibility. Stick to the questions being asked and stop wasting our times.” You warned the man as you paced the space in front of the stand.

“Me and everyone else in this room are looking for nothing but the truth, or must I remind you that you are under oath and also live on television?” You ask outloud as you turn to look at him.

“No, counselor.” The General, a heavy-set, older, mustachioed man replies, through gritted teeth, his face showing a polite expression while the man himself was seething on the inside.

“Very well, then, I’ll repeat the question. Were you or were you not aware of the aforementioned, unsactioned operations being conducted in the Al-Mazarah and Urzikstan border, involving CIA and MI6 operatives?” You asked, eyes glaring into the man’s eyes as you leaned into the stand near him.

“Well, as with most operations...”

“A yes or no is enough, General.” You told him sternly.

“Yes.” The man grits out.

“And did you, or did you not, give permission for these CIA and MI6 operatives, working under the guise of NATO, and I quote, from the transcript: “Authority to use any means necessary” on the enemy forces?” You confronted him.

“Well-”

“Yes or no?”

“Yes.”

“And did you do that while being aware that the teams involved would interpret such command as permission to execute an operation in which they’d use ‘extreme physical persuasion’ or, in other words, torture to achieve their goals?”

“I-”

“Did you or did you not, General?”

“Yes, but-”

“And did you, or did you not, not only demand the censoring of the clear and transparent reports received in the aftermath of that operation but also sign off on them yourself, to circumvent the proper channels of evaluation, which would force an internal audit to be conducted?”

“Yes-”

“So, in short, you just confirmed that you authorized your troops to, essentially, wipe their asses with the Geneva convention and comit war crimes on the POWs under their care?”

“Counselor-” One of the judges called out.

“Withdrawn. No further questions, Mr. Chairman.” You told the Chairman and the jury panel that sat above you, as you swiftly turned around and marched up to your table, high heels clacking on the polished floors of the court room.

Your eyes locked onto John’s as he sat in the back of the room, wearing his full regalia, his eyes locked onto yours with a strange shine to them… Almost like he’s proud of you.

As soon as you sit on the chair and the Chairman once again takes over, addressing the room, the General, calling other witnesses, your phone’s screen lights up on the chair next to you.

Picking it up quietly, you spot a message of John’s:

John: that’s my girl. knew you could do it. you: you owe me big time. John: i do. saved my arse there. you: of course. it’s what I’m here for.  John: almost making it sound like you love me. you: no but I wouldn’t let anything happen to you. you: no way in hell you’re leaving me alone with 3 children. John: i see. selfish woman. you: shut up.  you: and try not torturing POWs next time. John: yes, ma’am.

Five occasions seem to be enough to keep a 23-year marriage afloat.

a/n: Big thanks to my beloved @crashtestbunny for helping draft/plot all these interactiions and just the general toxicity! And also @mothymunson your beloved Toxic!Price is here!

[ O, Captain! Masterlist ] || [ My Masterlist ]

[roseghoul26]

Chapter 6: I'd Live And Die For Moments That We Stole

Synopsis: A fic based off the song “ivy” by Taylor Swift. After a startling introduction to the man, Arthur Morgan became the most important part of your life. Married at a young age to an older, wealthy man to help your family, you were trapped in a loveless marriage, your only sense of escape with the rugged cowboy. Will you be able to keep your affair hidden, or will your husband find out, and destroy the last thing that made you happy?

Tags: Fluff, Angst, Smut, Strangers To Lovers, Infidelity, Fem!Reader, She/Her Pronouns Used For Reader, Period Typical Misogyny, Emotional Manipulative Relationship (not with Arthur), Mostly Follows Timeline of Game, High Honor Arthur Morgan, Not Beta Read, Slow Burn, First Kiss, Tags Updated Per Chapter

Author's Note: so ttpd was released while writing this, and oh my god some of the songs on there work a little to well with either this fic or arthur morgan in general

also was not expecting so much attention from the ghoul fic and i will continue to write for him, i just still want to work on this too!

Taglist: @lokiofasgard12 @ultraporcelainpig @that-one-beannnn @morethantheycansay

Chapter List

Hans was home for three and a half weeks. 

Your days were either spent alone in your house, Hans shutting himself in his office, or out on the town, heading to dinners, plays, movies, and miscellaneous events that you hardly remembered. It was always a blur to you, anyway. 

You’d only caught glimpses of Arthur throughout the past weeks. He’d sometimes be roaming the streets of the cities you were in, keeping his distance, but you’d always feel his watchful eye on you. It made those days better, knowing that in a way he was by your side. 

If Hans noticed the extra eyes watching the two of you, more specifically you, he didn’t say anything. He still acted the same, attentive and loving husband in the public eye, cold and disdainful behind closed doors. It was exhausting, but you pushed through. 

The two of you had been at a party all night, your feet ached and the muscles of your face were strained from smiling so much. You had just walked into your house, around midnight, and you were exhausted. Hans had immediately retired upstairs, and you followed after him, getting ready for bed in your closet.

 You pulled off your dress, the fabric itchy and uncomfortable, and you had slipped into your nightgown. Slipping into bed beside Hans, you fell asleep rather quickly, and the night passed dreamlessly, much to your disappointment. 

You woke up alone, which wasn’t too out of the ordinary. What was out of the ordinary was that he didn't come down for breakfast, not responding when you called for him. When you knocked on his office door, there was no response. Confused, you peered outside, pleasantly shocked to find the carriage missing. He’d never just left like that; there was always some sort of heads up, and he always requested your company in bed.

You were nowhere near upset, though, and you gleefully cleaned up the kitchen. You spent the next few days in your garden, luckily not as wrecked as it was the first time, your planters holding up well. 

It was the third night when you heard a knock on your door, and you couldn’t help the giddy smile on your face as you bolted to the door. You didn’t have to look through the peephole to know who was there, and you opened the door quickly. 

There was Arthur Morgan on the other side of your door, hair longer than you remembered, but that same dazzling grin on his face. 

You stood there, not quite shocked, but your brain was still unsure of how to react. Your body knew, though, and you nearly tackled him to the ground with the force of your hug, arms wrapping around his neck. 

He wasn’t expecting your reaction, a startled whoa leaving him, but he immediately reciprocated the hug, like he needed this just as badly as you did. You sagged into his arms, a breath you’d been holding for the last three and a half weeks finally being released. Resting your head on his chest, that comforting smell of him made you smile. Oh, how you missed him. 

“I missed ya too, darlin’,” he chuckled, and you tilted your head back to look up at him. It was adorable, the way his ears turned red, flustered by your sheer adoration of him. 

You snuck a hand up into his hair, combing through the longer strands that stuck out from beneath his hat. He sighed under your touch, his eyes threatening to flutter close. “It’s so long now,” you muttered more to yourself, and you watched him raise a brow. 

“I just keep forgettin’ to cut it,” he admitted.

“I ain’t complainin’,'' you laughed. “It suits you.”

He just hummed noncommittally, and the two of you stood in silence, simply taking in the presence of the other. You saw the way his eyes flicked down to your lips and then back up. The motion was quick, like he was unsure if you’d want him to kiss you again, if you thought the last time had been a mistake. 

You didn’t give him a chance to get lost in his thoughts, standing up on your tiptoes to brush your lips against his. His beard was longer than last time, too. It was less of a stubble and more of a soft layer of hair, and it tickled less than last time. 

He smiled, barely able to contain his relief, and you felt him cup the side of your face, bringing your face back for a proper kiss. When his lips slotted against yours, you reconfirmed your belief from the first time; he truly did feel like home.

“I really did miss you,” you whispered out once the kiss broke. 

“I’m here now. Unfortunate for you,” he chuckled, and you slapped him lightly on the chest. 

“Hush, Arthur,” you admonished, shaking your head. “C’mon, let's get inside.”

It took a few moments for you two to release each other, and you took his hand once you stepped apart, leading him into the house. You didn’t even have to ask before he was taking off his boots, and you were dragging him upstairs. 

The implications of what you were doing were lost to you as you brought him upstairs, but you heard Arthur mutter your name, confused but not completely against the idea.

“For the life of me, I can’t get into his office,” you explained. “I ain’t got the skills you do.”

“And I do? Quite rude of you to assume.”

You scoffed, sparing him a disbelieving look. “Arthur, did you forget how we met?”

By this time you’d reached the top of the stairs, standing outside the locked office door. Excitement caused your heart to race, not ready for what you might possibly find in the office. Even though you were raised to not be a snoop, it was quite fun digging into peoples personal items, and it was especially fun when said personal items belong to your husband. 

“Fair enough,” Arthur conceded, and he pulled a few items out of his pocket, tools you assumed he was going to use to pick the lock. “This’ll just take a sec.”

Arthur got down on his knees in front of the door, and you watched as he fiddled with the tools, silently listening for something. You had no idea what he was doing, but it was quite fascinating to watch. Besides, you got to appreciate the way hands flexed and fingers moved as he worked the lock.

It was less than thirty seconds before he was standing up, a small yet proud smirk on his face. “It… it’s that easy?”

Arthur laughed at that. “Nah, it was unlocked.”

“You’re fuckin’ kidding.” 

He stared at you blankly before laughing again. “You shoulda seen your face. Yes, I’m kiddin’.”

“Arthur Morgan!” That just made him laugh harder, and you cherished the sound, locking it away in your brain. You joined in, chucklining lightly. “You bastard,” you teased. 

“Sorry,” he replied, not sounding sorry at all “I had to. Forgive me.” 

You shook your head, leaning against the wall. “I don’t.”

“Then what do I gotta do to earn your forgiveness, darlin’?” He moved toward you, brushing his fingers over the apple of your cheek, tucking away hair that wasn’t there.

“I could think of a few ways,” you murmured, not so subtly looking at his plush lips. 

Grinning, he didn’t bother responding before kissing you, hat knocking into your head. “Am I forgiven now?”

You snuck in one last quick peck before responding. “I guess.”

“I’ll take that.”

He held your face for a few moments longer, eyes sparkling with adoration. His expression then sobered, and he shoved the tools back into his pocket, removing his hand and setting it on the doorknob. “You ready?”

You took his other hand, nodding, and he held the door open for you as you stepped into his office for the first time.

It was way messier than you expected. Stacks of books and piles of paper seemed to loom over you; one stray gust of air could topple it all down. There were high shelves lining one of the walls, filled floor to ceiling with different books, knicknacks, and various loose papers stuck between the books. A large oak desk stood in the middle, a large leather chair tucked in, equally as covered with papers, and various splotches of ink had long since dried into the wood.

There weren’t any windows, making the room stuffy, and you could feel the dust tickling your nose. You were left speechless, feeling suddenly overwhelmed with the amount of stuff in front of you. “How…” you managed to let out, and Arthur just shook his head. 

He made his way to the desk, your hands still intertwined, and he began to shuffle through the papers, spreading them around on the desk. His eyes danced around the papers, and he let out a sigh, nothing sticking out to him. You opened the drawers, only seeing junk and even more paper. 

You were about to shut the final one before a rectangular shape caught your eye. Pulling it out, you set it on the desk, the book automatically falling open. Leaning in to investigate further, you realized it was a ledger book of sorts, but everything was written in shorthand or codes, indecipherable to you. 

“The hell?” Arthur murmured, just as confused as you were. “This even English?”

“Maybe?” You flipped the pages, the words changing but still not understandable. “I mean, it’s obviously a ledger, but that’s all I can tell.”

When you flipped a few more pages the same thing happened, you sighed. “I thought it would’ve been that easy, just finding the ledger book and having everything you needed to know be right there.”

“It usually is. Criminals ain’t the smartest sometimes.” Arthur pulled out the chair and sat in it. You sat on the arm rest, leaning against Arthur a bit, your foot still holding most of your weight. “Let’s see here…”

Arthur looked through the papers on the desk again, and you were able to catch glimpses of what they were; they were a mix of receipts, letters, and various documentation. There were a few names, none of which you recognized, and you watched Arthur scribble them down into his notebook. 

“I think that should be good for now.”

You weren’t going to lie, you had spaced out a bit while scanning over the various documents, the writing quickly turning to a blur in your eyes. You jumped when Arthur stood, nearly causing you to topple over, but you felt him secure you with a hand on your waist. “Already?” You asked.

“I’ve got a few names’ I’ll see where they lead.” Arthur shrugged. “I don’t wanna spend too much time in here, anyway.” To prove his point, he led you out of the office, shutting the door behind you. 

“Then why’d you come over?”

“Ouch.”

“I didn’t mean it like that,” you chuckled.

“Will you ever believe that I come over just to see you?”

“Probably not.”

Arthur rolled his eyes, and began to lead you back downstairs. “Where you takin’ me?” You asked, and he didn’t respond, getting his shoes on and leaving the house. “Arthur?”

“You’ll see,” was all he said, not letting go of your hand as you descended the stairs. 

“What’re we doin’?”

Arthur sighed. “Have you ever heard of a surprise?” 

The familiar form of Bear caught your eye, and you made a noise to get his attention. It worked, the horse flicking its head towards you, nickering excitedly as you and Arthur approached. 

“Hello, Bear!” You let go of Arthur’s hand, striding over to the horse happily. You missed how affectionately Arthur looked at you, a warm smile on his lips as he watched you. “How’s my favorite boy doin’?”

“That’s the second time I’ve been insulted by you today.”

You ran one of your hands on his snout, the other patting his neck. “Ignore him, Bear. He’s grumpy.” You rambled out praises to the horse, and his eyes visibly relaxed, practically pressing himself into your hands. “Such a good boy, Bear.”

You felt his lips on your neck first, the soft beard barely tickling your skin. His arms were next, wrapping over yours, keeping you pressed close to his chest. “What did I say ‘bout spoilin’ my horse, darlin’?” He rocked with you side to side, occasionally pressing his lips against your skin. 

“He deserves it,” you giggled. “He always brings you back to me.”

Arthur stilled. “I… I suppose you’re right.”

“I am right.” You broke the tension that threatened to form with a verbal jab, and Arthur chuckled. 

His arms released your body, but he kept his hands on you, trailing them over your arms, and then settling on your hips. “You ready?”

“Sure, but you-”

Arthur cut you off by grasping your waist, lifting you effortlessly and setting you on the back of Bear. A startled cry left your lips, and you glared at Arthur once he set you down. “A warning next time?” You tried to not seem as freaked out as you were, clutching at the saddle in front of you for some sense of stability. 

“I did,” he responded, chuckling when your glare returned. When he got into the saddle in front of you, you instinctively wrapped your arms around him, clinging on to him. “You good?” He asked, concern in his voice.

“I…” you felt ashamed to admit to him, “I ain’t been on a horse in… years. Not since I was a little kid.”

“Bear’s a good horse. He’s never bucked me off, if you’re afraid of that.”

You exhaled shakily, your head resting on his back. “Alright, just don’t expect me to let go.”

“I’ll never complain ‘bout your hands on me,” he almost proudly admitted, and in response you just tighten your grip. “Ready?” He asked again.

“Yes.” You didn’t bother asking what you were doing again, knowing you weren’t going to get an answer. 

Arthur kicked his heel lightly, giving Bear the go ahead to start moving. You refrained from gripping on to him tighter, not wanting to choke the poor man, and you watched the scenery begin to move past you. Arthur kept a slower pace, no doubt a pace he normally wouldn’t ride at, but his consideration towards you had you melting. 

Even though most of the wind was blocked by Arthur’s frame, you still felt it grace your skin, hair streaming behind you. It felt nice, not too chilly, and it helped you relax.

It took a few moments for you to lift your head from his back, your arms loosening, settling lightly on his waist. “Alright?” He asked, the wind not loud enough to overpower his voice yet. 

“I think so. Are… are you gonna tell me yet?”

“Do you trust me?” Interesting response, you thought. 

“Of course.”

“Then trust me when I say you’re gonna like it.”

“You’re no fun,” you teased, feeling comfortable enough to remove one of your hands from his waist, flicking the back of his hat.

Arthur grumbled something, but you could hear his smile. 

He rode on for a few minutes, and you took the time to just absorb the beautiful scenery around you. It was much more enjoyable to look at when you weren’t crammed into a stuffy carriage with a miserable man. 

Out of the corner of your eye, you saw a large stag, hidden between the bushes. His head followed the both of you as you passed, but it quickly turned when a doe approached him from one of the bushes. You didn’t get to point them out to Arthur before they were scampering away, the stag following the doe into the thicket, the sound of branches snapping the only proof of their existence.  

You truly had no idea where Arthur was taking you, your attention focusing back on the road. He had returned to the main road, sure, but he wasn’t heading in the direction of any major towns. The thick woodland had turned sparse, making way for rolling hills of grass with the occasional flower, with flocks of animals out enjoying the incredible weather. 

As Arthur continued the slow pace, you began to feel antsy, and you were also feeling a bit brace. “You can go faster,” you leaned forward to tell him, and he looked over at you. 

“Yeah?”

When you made a comfiring noise, he grinned, looking positively excited. It made him look so young, so carefree, and you couldn’t help but grin in response. 

Securing your grip back around him, he urged Bear on more, who was more than happy to comply. A startled laugh left you as Bear went faster, your smile widening, wind whipping against your body. It was exhilarating, but you needed more. 

“Faster!” You had to start shouting a bit, the wind becoming more intense. 

Arthur shook his head, chuckling, and you watched him spur Bear on again. He broke into a gallop, the world around you becoming a blur. You don’t think you’ve ever moved this fast in your life, and it was incredible. Laughing joyfully, you felt Arthur do the same, leading Bear along the road with small pulls on the reigns.

You’re not sure how long you two tore through the countryside, but it felt like no time had passed before Arthur was bringing Bear to a trot. You were still laughing, brushing back your hair which you were sure was a complete mess, but you didn’t care.

Artur led you off the main road, leading you up a large yet gradual hill. The top was completely flat, with only a few dry bushes and patches of grass interrupting the stone. A few small rodents looked at you curiously, before retreating to their burrows. 

Dismounting, Arthur didn’t secure Bear to anything, but you knew that he trusted him to not run off. After swinging your leg over, Arthur helped you down, holding you even when your feet hit the ground. Something flashed over his face as he watched you catch your breath, the wide grin on your lips never ceasing. His thumb rubbed into your skin where he held you on your waist, which didn’t help to calm down your racing heart. 

“Good?” 

You nodded. “I’m wonderful. That was… that was incredible. You get to do that every day?” You asked, something similar to envy in your voice.

“If you ever want to take him out for a ride, just let me know. I think Bear’d love that.”

You glanced back at the horse, who was watching you expectantly. Laughing slightly, you left the comforting hold of Arthur, patting Bear's neck. Arthur moved beside you, grabbing something fabric looking from the saddlebags, as well as a bottle of what assumed to be liquor. He extended an arm for you, and you gladly took it, linking your arm with his. It was similar to the way Hans would have you on his arm, showing you off almost like an accessory. This felt different, though, like it always did with Arthur. 

You shook the thoughts of your husband out of your mind; right now was about you and Arthur. He led you to the edge of the hill, and you let out a gasp at the view. You were able to see what felt like the entirety of The Heartlands, rolling fields of grass as far as the eye could see. Mountains dotted the skyline, and you could see a few small towns littered about. Hoards of different animals grazed, from bison to deer to turkeys. 

So enthralled by the view in front of you, you hadn’t noticed Arthur laying out a blanket beside you, until he tugged lightly at your arm. He pulled you down to a seated position, sitting behind you so you could rest your back against him. His arms immediately wrapped around you when you did, pressing a kiss to your cheek before settling his head on your shoulder, watching the landscape with you.

“It’s beautiful,” you whispered, and you heard Arthur humm in agreement. “How’d you find this?”

“I was huntin’, and I was tracking somethin’ that led me up here. As soon as I saw it I knew I had to bring you here.”

You couldn’t help but smile at the fact that Arthur thought of you while he was out on his travels. “You think ‘bout me a lot, Arthur Morgan?” You teased, pushing away a feeling you were too scared to name still. 

“All the damn time,” he admitted, an airy laugh leaving him and tickling your ear. “You know that.”

“Maybe. Or maybe I just like hearin’ you say it.”

Arthur didn’t respond, just holding you like you were a lifeline, and you found that you could spend the rest of your life wrapped up in his arms. Eventually, conversation started between the two of you, catching the other up on what had transpired over the last few weeks, the liquor bottle Arthur brough being uncorked and passed between the two of you. It was a decent tasting whiskey, but you only took a few sips, not wanting to have this moment be clouded over with fuzziness. 

His arms had stayed wrapped around you for most of the time, but over the past hour had slowly let up, choosing to run his fingers over your body instead. It started with small touches on your side, before trialing up and down your arms and legs, to up your shoulder, brushing against your neck. It was like he was trying to memorize your body simply with his touch.

Every time he brushed over a sensitive area of your body, you’d shiver, and he’d smile, changing the infliction of his voice if he was speaking. It was hard to stay focused, either on his words or your own story. 

This was the fifth time you’d trailed off while you were speaking, and you laughed, resting your head back. “You’re distractin’ me.”

“You want me to stop?”

“Never.”

Arthur chuckled, and you felt those calloused fingers brush over your arms again, moving down to your hands. “Can’t help myself. Beautiful woman in my arms, it’d be a crime not to touch her.”

You’re sure your cheeks were dangerously warm. “Well, she ain’t complainin’,” you breathed out, and you felt his hands rest on the back of your, fingers weaving into yours. 

“You ain’t wearin’ your ring.” He sounded like he was almost in disbelief. 

You glanced down at your left hand, his much larger once encapsulating it. You’d taken it off a day ago, setting it in your nightstand. You’re not quite sure why you did it, but it felt like fifty pounds had been lifted off you when you took it off. “No, I ain’t.”

His right hand grasped your chin, turning your face towards his, which continued to rest on your shoulder. Pure longing was written across his face, but his lips were possessive when they made contact with yours. The grasp shifted from your chin to the side of your face, fingers tracing patterns into your cheeks. It pulled you in closer to him, but you needed him closer. You needed to feel him. 

You shifted so that you were facing him, hands bracing on his chest. You felt him sigh when your hands traveled up, over his neck and tanging into his hair. His hat hit the ground behind him, and he pulled you into his lap, your lips never separating once. The new angle had you leaning above him slightly, your hands in his hair pulling his head back, but he didn’t mind. 

You had forgotten what it was like to be kissed with so much passion, so much energy, and you couldn’t help but admit to yourself what you’d been trying to bury for weeks: you were in love with him. 

It made you gasp, pulling away from the kiss and resting your head against his. It wasn’t that you were against the fact that you were in love with him. But you had no idea if he felt the same. You knew he cared about you, there was no denying that, but was he in love with you? Knowing what kind of life Arthur lived, you didn’t see him as the committal type, not wanting to be bound to a person or place. 

He took you pulling away as you needing a moment to breathe, smiling gently at you. A large hand cupped the side of your face, and you melted into his touch, like you could respond any other way.

You debated just confessing to him right there, but anxiety welded your mouth close. Instead, you opted to just kiss him again, quick but no less lovely.

Sitting back on his lap, the sun was beginning to disappear below the horizon, just behind Arthur. The lighting made him look ethereal, brown hair golden, and you’re sure you were staring at him like a lovestruck fool. “You’re so beautiful,” you sighed out, laughing a bit when he looked away embarrassed. 

“Shouldn’t I be sayin’ that to you?”

“You already have. It’s my turn.”

He chuckled, still not believing what you were saying, but he was humoring you. “Alright, darlin’, how much whiskey did you have?”

You were drunk on something much better than the whiskey, that’s for sure. “I mean it, Arthur. You’re gorgeous.”

It was clear that he still didn’t believe you, but he thanked you anyway, kissing you lightly again. Resting your head on his shoulder, you wrapped your arms around his broad body, holding him in a embrace. 

You sat in Arthur’s lap for a good while, simply holding each other, and you felt the occasion kiss on your head. The two of you didn’t feel the need to talk, and you got lost in the sound of Arthur’s breathing. 

The sun had set, and as it left so did its warmth, cool night air hitting your body. You shivered, Arthur’s body heat doing nothing to protect your back from the cold. “As lovely as this is, I’d hate for you to get sick,” you heard Arthur murmur, and you hated that he was right. You didn’t want to leave, but you knew you’d regret it if you didn’t. 

“Alright,” you huffed out, untangling yourself from him, which just made you more cold. Standing up, you grabbed his hat for him as he stood, and you placed it atop his head. He grinned up at you, grabbing the blanket and draping it over his arm, extending the other for you again. 

Just like he had led you up the hill, he led you down to where Bear was resting, his ears flicking happily when he saw the two of you approaching. You gave him a few pats before Arthur lifted you on to his rump, and even then you were sure to murmur to him. Arthur handed you the blanket, and you wrapped it around your shoulders, keeping it secure between your two bodies once he joined you on Bear. 

As he took off, one of his hands went back to rest on your thigh, like he was making sure that you were still with him. Like you’d want to be anywhere else. And if someone tried to take you away, then you’d fight like a cornered animal to get back. 

The ride back was different at night; scenery that was once peaceful and comforting now becoming foreign and terrifying. Arthur went quick, not as quickly as before, but fast enough that said terrifying scenery went by fast. 

The ride felt shorter than you wished, the familiar sight of your house causing you to sigh, holding on to Arthur a tad bit tighter than what was necessary. 

Pulling up to the porch, he dismounted quickly, helping you down again. You were sure to leave the blanket on Bear, giving him a goodnight pat before climbing the stairs, Arthur following behind. 

You lingered in the doorway after he held the door open for you, an invitation for him to come in on the tip of your tongue. But you couldn’t bring yourself to say them, not wanting to scare him away. So you just smiled at him, kissing him lightly on the cheek. 

“Wait,” you heard him say before you were about to wish him a good night, “I’ve got somethin’ for you.”

Curious, you cocked your head as he dug into his satchel,pulling out a torn out piece of paper. “Read it when you get inside,” he instructed as he handed it to you. 

“Should I be worried?” You joked.

“Nah,” he chuckled. “Just… you’ll see when you read it.”

Well, now you were excited. “Okay…” you laughed, before kissing him for the final time that night. “I had an amazin’ day today, so thank you. Sincerely.”

“Of course, darlin’. Have a good night.”

“‘Night, Arthur. Come back to me, okay?” 

He nodded, tilting his hat at you, stepping down the porch. In the back of your mind, you remembered the lessons you’d had in the backyard with Arthur, learning how to shoot and gun. You remembered that today you were supposed to learn how to reload it, but it had completely slipped from your mind until now. You let it pass again, though. There was always next time.

You stood in the doorway until Arthur was long gone, clutching the note to your chest. When you finally retreated inside, you sighed happily, still caught up in the trance that the night had been. 

Sitting on the couch, you looked over the small piece of paper, clearly torn from his journal. There was an address scrawled across the top in that familiar messy cursive, some place in the state of Ambarino. It didn’t make much sense to you, so you read the following note left by Arthur, which started with your name. 

It took a bit of asking around, but I was able to find the new address of the Van Buren estate. From what I can tell, they’re doing well. It wouldn’t be a bad time to reach out, if and only if you feel ready.

- A

There was something scribbled out before his name, like he was planning on writing sincerely or something like that, but he must’ve deemed it too formal for a note like this. 

You sat there, shocked, tears welling in your eyes as you stared at the note. Two years of no contact with your family was almost over. It was so close. 

Leaning back against the couch, you held the note back to your chest, thanking the heavens for Arthur. There was no denying it now; you were so in love with him.

[bwabys-scenarios]

Fixer Upper

Perv!Kurapika x Fem!Reader

Part 6

part 5

part 7

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A/N: I wrote this because I desperately want to go swimming but I can’t. Will also be a beach and hot springs trip in the near future because it’s MY fanfic I can write what I want

Kurapika woke up with a headache, grateful for whatever soft surface he was nestled against. He knew he needed to get up and take some medicine for the pain, but how could he when he was just so comfortable?

‘Mmm… when did I fall asleep?’

He slowly lifted himself up, blinking sleepily as his eyes focused on the surface he’d been lying on.

His eyes landed on two soft mounds laid he’d been resting between, his tired mind trying to make sense of what they were before he heard something.

“Mmph… Kurapika, you awake?”

(Name) pushed herself up, rubbing at her eyes as she yawned. Kurapika stared at her for a few seconds as he began to process everything.

His hands were at either side of her hips and his face inches away from her boobs. Was that… was that the soft surface he’d just been sleeping on?

Kurapika rose from the couch and sprinted to his room, slamming the door shut behind him. (Name) was too tired to react and ended up rolling over and pulling the throw blanket up to her chin.

‘When did I end up… like that? I was lying between…’

He slowly stroked his cock to the residual feeling of her boobs pressed against his face. Kurapika lifted his shirt to his nose, sighing in contentment at (Name)‘s lingering scent.

It made his stomach coil into a tight knot, the man barely containing a whimper as he came onto his freshly cleaned sheets.

It was still dark outside, the man realizing he’d need to get his sheets to the laundry room before anyone else woke up.

‘I wanna sleep like that again…’

He sighed softly as he carried his sheets to the laundry room, stealing a glance at (Name) when he passed by.

She looked awfully cute all cuddled up on the couch. Kurapika couldn’t help his eyes softening when they landed on her sleeping form.

He set his sheets down on a chair and stepped closer, crouching down to take a look at her sleeping face.

She was smiling in her sleep, the blanket pulled up to her chin. Kurapika tucked some of her hair behind her ear and made sure she was completely covered before stepping back.

It was much easier to look after her while she was asleep. He watched over her every day from a distance, but now he could take in the small details he hadn’t been able to during the daylight hours.

Now that she was asleep, he could give her a sweet smile and admire her cute face without feeling guilty about leaving her in the near future. He’d always found her cute, ever since they first met during the first stage of the Hunter Exam.

Even now, nearly three years later he still struggled to understand the feelings he had for her. Being near her soothed something deep inside him, calmed the raging fire in his heart that threatened to burn away the last bits of humanity that still remained.

He wondered if it was the same type of care he felt for Melody. She also helped him feel softer, but it was different. Melody felt more like a mother figure, someone he could never look at in the same way he did (Name).

No, his feelings for (Name) were more complex than friendship. He just didn’t know exactly what it was yet.

“What the hell are you doing?”

Kurapika jumped back at the sound of someone’s voice echoing through the living room, his eyes gone wide with both shock and embarrassment.

“I- um. I was just tucking her in.”

Killua stared at him from the hallway with narrowed eyes. “You’ve been looking at her like a creep for the past 5 minutes.”

Kurapika’s cheeks darkened. “I…”

Killua groaned and walked towards the kitchen, opening the fridge and taking out the milk. “First you get drunk and beg for her to hold you while you sleep, and now you stare at her while SHE sleeps. What the hell is wrong with you?”

‘I begged for her to hold me? Oh god…’

Kurapika groaned and held his aching head in his hands. “Please be quiet, my head is pounding.”

Killua thought about yelling for a moment, but (Name) was sleeping peacefully just a few feet away.

“Whatever.”

He made himself a bowl of cereal as Kurapika skittered away to wash his sheets before anyone caught him.

Killua had seen the way he’d looked at (Name), and it made him uneasy. How could he look at her like that yet be so cold to her when she was awake? It didn’t make sense to him.

‘Is he… unaware of his feelings?’

——————

A few days pass by quietly.

Kurapika had tried following Leorio’s advice one night and looked up some random porn to watch.

He didn’t enjoy it one bit. Watching other people have sex wasn’t something he was interested in. He ended up being more embarrassed than aroused, quickly clicking off of the video and rolling over in bed with a huff.

The woman in the video wasn’t someone he could ever see himself being interested in. She wasn’t soft, her voice too shrill and her eyes not holding that familiar warmth that made his stomach do backflips.

She wasn’t (Name).

Kurapika thought about her face when she’d woken up to him nestled between her chest. She didn’t look angry, just a bit sleepy. She’d had her hand in his hair, gently combing her fingers through his blonde locks.

He was hard again, just from the thought of (Name). He didn’t even need to think of her in states of undress, just thinking of her smile and sweet voice when she spoke to him could make him cum before he could think.

Kurapika panted softly to catch his breath, his cum painted over his bare chest. He was a little embarrassed at how fast he finished, just from the thought of (Name) alone. It had only been a few minutes between turning off his phone and orgasming.

For some reason, his instinct told him he shouldn’t cum so fast, that he shouldn’t feel good about it.

‘I’ll get better… wait why do I care about that?’

He shook the thought from his head and wiped his chest off with a tissue before running to the bathroom to shower.

(Name) was too busy packing up premade lunches into a basket to pay any attention to the blonde. After a quick shower, he entered the living room wearing a pair of sweat pants, no shirt.

“What are you doing, (Name)?”

The girl glanced back, only to avert her gaze when she noticed he didn’t have a shirt on.

“O-oh, I’m just packing up for our trip to the pool. I know it’s still really early-“

“It’s 4 am, (Name).”

He walked over to her, sighing. “You should get some sleep. I can finish up.”

“No, you don’t have to do that, I promise I don’t-“

He put a finger to her lips and smiled.

“Be a good girl and head upstairs. I can handle making some sandwiches.”

(Name)’s eyes stared at his finger, her face heating up. She didn’t dare speak, blinking up at him with her pretty (e/c) eyes so obediently.

Kurapika’s brief burst of courage crumbled when his eyes met her’s.

“Go on. Get some sleep now.”

He shooed her away before he could see he’d gotten hard again just by making eye contact. She giggled, sending him a sweet smile.

“Thanks, Kurapika. You’re the best.”

Oh.

That made his heart flutter. Him, the best? That was objectively wrong but it still gave him butterflies.

“G-goodnight.”

He cursed himself for being so nervous. She was (Name), his close friend. He had no reason to be nervous around her.

Unless you count the weird sexual feelings that kept bubbling to the surface every time she was around.

But he wasn’t going to acknowledge that. Kurapika pushed those feelings down much like he had pushed down his more innocent attraction to her back in York New.

‘Just two more weeks. Then I’ll be gone, and away from her. She’ll be safe, and I can focus on my mission.’

—————

Gon and Killua were the first ones up, quickly ascending the stairs to (Name)’s room.

“(Name)! The pool opens in an hour!”

The girl opened the door, sleepily pushing past them and down the stairs to make breakfast.

“We don’t have to be there the second it opens, you know.”

Gon gasped. “Of course we do! Early bird gets the worm, and the worm is the good table with the green umbrella!”

(Name) sighed. ‘Again with the green umbrella. He gets so mad when someone else takes that specific table…’

As she reached the final step on the stairs, she paused.

“Is that the smell of someone cooking? Oh no, LEORIO!”

(Name) dashed forward, only stopping when she heard Leorio yell at her from the bathroom.

“CAN’T A MAN SHIT IN PEACE?”

‘Wait, if the boys are upstairs and Leorio is in the bathroom, that leaves…’

Kurapika stood in the kitchen, flipping pancakes while bacon sizzled on the stovetop next to him.

“Oh, (Name). You’re awake. I went ahead and made breakfast since so you could sleep in.”

(Name) walked closer and peeked over his shoulder. “Oh wow, this looks great Kurapika!”

The man suppressed the pride swelling up in his chest, instead smiling back at her. “Thank you. It should be ready in a few minutes. Why don’t you go get dressed?”

(Name) was very happy this morning. Not only was breakfast being made for her, but Kurapika was the one making it! He was back to being the sweet Kurapika she knew.

But (Name) wasn’t sure how long this would last.

‘I’ll just soak up all the time I have with him. Just smile and be happy while he’s here.’

She grabbed her bathing suit from the laundry room before running upstairs.

——————

Kurapika knew he probably shouldn’t go. He was still struggling to look at (Name) without getting aroused. He was almost sure he’d spend the entire trip trying to hide his hard on from (Name) as she pranced around the pool in her less than modest bathing suit.

But he couldn’t say no when (Name) was giving him such a cute smile as she planned out their day. It might just break her heart, and although Kurapika was capable of that for the right reasons, not wanting to go with her to the pool was not a good enough reason.

“Kurapika, you almost ready?” She asked from behind his bedroom door.

The previous day, Kurapika and Leorio had taken the mom van to town and bought themselves some decent swim wear.

Before, Kurapika would have just stripped and swam in his underwear, but apparently that was looked down upon in public settings.

“Yes, (Name). Could you grab me something to pull my hair back with?”

“Of course!”

(Name) ran to the bathroom and dig around the drawers. It was weird, she was always losing scrunchies and hair ties. She grabbed a pink ponytail holder and walked back to Kurapika’s room.

His door was open now, allowing (Name) to enter.

Kurapika wore a pair of navy blue swim trunks and a plain white shirt. Currently, he was combing out his longer than usual hair.

“Oh, (Name), just in time.”

He took the ponytail holder from her outstretched palm and pulled his hair back into a low ponytail.

“Ah.”

It didn’t look good. His hair looked messy and Kurapika hadn’t wrapped the ponytail holder around his hair enough, so it was slowly slipping from his hair.

(Name) stepped closer, pulling the ponytail holder from his hair with a giggle. “Sit, I’ll do it.”

He did, a bit flustered with her close contact. She used a comb to brush back his hair evenly and place it in a ponytail, making it tight enough that it would stay in place, but loose enough to not cause a headache for the blonde.

“There, all better.”

She smiled over his head, a little giddy that she was seemingly taller then him in this state. He rose from his seat and quickly dwarfed her.

“Thank you. I may need a haircut soon, I hate how my hair keeps getting in my eyes.”

(Name) pouted. “Aww, but I love your long hair. It’s so pretty!”

Kurapika looked away quickly. “…”

‘She likes my hair longer…’

“But of course, I like your hair short too. I think I would like any style you tried.”

She sat on his bed next to him and leaned on his shoulder. “If you’re ready for a hair cut, we can schedule one w-“

He shook his head. “I… think I’ll keep it this way a little longer.”

(Name) smiled. “Hehe…”

He let her lean on him for a few minutes. He’d missed the feeling of her body against his, Kurapika almost craved it.

(Name) sighed before standing up. “It’s time to go. If we don’t hurry up, Gon and Killua will freak out.”

He frowned, but didn’t argue. Kurapika tried to soak in the lingering warmth of her body against his.

——————

The five piled into the mom van and drove to the pool. It was only 8 am, but the two boys were shaking with excitement in the back seat.

They got to the pool minutes after it opened, and they were lucky enough to be the only ones there so far.

Leorio and Kurapika unloaded the ice chest and picnic basket from the van and followed Gon to the table with a green umbrella. Usually that table would be enough for Gon, Killua, and (Name), but they had two extra people today, so they also took up the table next to it.

“Alright boys, sunscreen first, then I’ll take out the pool toys.”

Gon happily sat on the table as she rubbed sunscreen into his back. Killua attempted to just jump into the pool, but was caught by Gon and dragged over.

“No offense Killua, but if you don’t pit sunscreen on you’ll turn into a hot dog again.”

Killua scowled at his friend as (Name) made sure she got every inch of his exposed skin with sunscreen. She didn’t want to hear him whine and complain about his sunburn for the next few days if she missed a single spot.

“Okay, you’re all set. Here.”

She tossed a few pool rings into the water and the boys immediately jumped in to catch them. Kurapika watched this with mild amusement.

‘They’re like trained dolphins.’ He thought, snickering to himself.

“Kurapika, you’re next.”

The blonde blinked from his seat. “Me? But I-“

“But nothing. You’re almost as pale as Killua, come here and I’ll get your back.”

She patted the seat in front of her. Leorio pushed Kurapika forward. “Go on, she’s not taking no for an answer.”

He sat down, pulling off his shirt with a huff. Kurapika usually wasn’t the type to be insecure about his appearance, but being around (Name) was an exception.

She never commented on his appearance, but he’d catch the worry in her eyes when she noticed he’d lost weight or garnered too many new scars.

(Name) tried not to react to the new scars decorating the pale skin of his shoulders and back. Instead, she began applying the sunscreen quietly.

“Ah-“

He cried out when he felt the shock of both her touch and the cold sunscreen touch his back, pulling away a bit. Leorio started snickering, applying some sunscreen of his own.

Kurapika sent him a glare before he tried to relax. Her hands ran over the length of his back and shoulders, the man barely holding back a whimper when he felt her nails brush against his skin.

When she finished, she handed him the sunscreen. “You can handle the front, right?”

He gave a quick, flustered nod. Kurapika didn’t think he’d be able to handle having her hands all over his chest.

She gave him a smile before moving on to her Leorio’s back.

Once everyone was covered in sunscreen, (Name) pulled down the shorts she’d pulled on over her bottoms and threw her shirt into the dry clothes bag.

Kurapika stared as she bent over to pull her shorts down, his eyes flickering red for a split second before he turned to look away.

“Ah…”

Kurapika looked up to see (Name) struggling to reach her back with the sunscreen.

‘Why isn’t she asking for help? She just helped all of us.’

The blonde began to stand to go and help her, but Leorio was faster.

“Oh, stop it. I’ll help you.”

The dark haired man towered of the shorter woman, snatching the sunscreen out of her hands. “Should of just asked.”

Leorio mumbled as he began working the sunscreen into her (s/c) skin, Kurapika’s eyes narrowing. He didn’t enjoy seeing seeing Leorio’s hands all over (Name), it unsettled him.

“Leorio, ouch! You’re going to rub me raw!”

She smacked his hands away, sighing. “You’re too rough, this is why I didn’t ask.”

That was only a half truth. (Name) didn’t like relying on other people, even though she was the shoulder to cry on for many.

“I’ve got it.”

Kurapika pushed Leorio into the pool and squirted some of the sunscreen into his hands.

“Oh, thank you Kurapika. Be gentle, please.”

Kurapika couldn’t ignore her when she was asking so sweetly, could he?

He rubbed it between his palms before hesitantly placing his hands on either of her shoulders. She didn’t react, patiently waiting for him to continue.

He didn’t want to admit how much it aroused him to have his hands roam her body, even if it was only her back. The sight of the white sunscreen covering her screen was also a big turn on. He could just imagine her with her butt in the air, completely covered in his-

Kurapika finished quickly before rushing to jump into the water himself. That would help cool him down, and hide his boner.

—————

(Name) sat on the edge of the pool with her feet dipped in the water, trying not to flinch when drops of water hit her skin.

“(Name), when are you getting in?”

KIllua and Gon waded over to her, carrying pool toys. She shrugged. “In a minute. I’m just getting used to the temperature of the water.”

Killua groaned. “You said that ten minutes ago, just get in already!”

He waited impatiently, watching her with those cat like eyes. She knew if she didn’t get in willingly soon, the two would drag her in.

(Name) sighed and slowly slipped into the water, letting out a squeak when her hips dipped in.

“Okay, Im in. Happy now?”

She waded deeper in, dropping her shoulders under the water to get it over with. Gon approached, smiling.

“(Name) do you want to play Chicken Fight with us? Leorio is refusing to play so we don’t have enough people.”

She tilted her head. “That implies Kurapika will be playing.”

Killua huffed. “Yeah, it surprised us too, but he agreed to play.”

(Name) nodded slowly. “Alright, I’ll play. What are the teams?”

Killua pointed to Gon. “Me and and Gon versus you and Kurap-“

“Never mind.”

She began to wade away but Gon caught her arm. “(Name), please! This is the first time we’ve had enough people to play! And it was so hard to convince Kurapika!”

She groaned. “But… ugh fine. You’re such a brat, you know I can’t say no when you’re looking at me with those puppy dog eyes.”

Gon cheered and pulled her to where Kurapika was waiting.

“Okay, I’m on going to ride on Gon’s shoulders.”

“(Name) will r-“

(Name) tried to swim away again, only to be tackled by Killua. “You’re not escaping now!”

He dragged the complaining woman back.

“Doesn’t it make more sense for you to ride on my shoulders? You definitely weight less than me.” (Name) stated, her hands on her hips.

“Does that really matter? I’m not weak, (Name). I’ve carried you before.”

“It matters to me. It’s… uncomfortable.”

“Why?” the three asked in unison. (Name) stared at them, her eyebrow twitching.

Sometimes she forgot that none of her friends were anywhere close to normal. They possessed inhuman strength, and none of them seemed to know about basic social norms.

Well, besides Leorio.

“Women don’t like being picked up if they think they’re too heavy. It’s embarrassing.” Leorio yelled out as he flipped through his textbook.

(Name) slapped a hand over her face. “Gee, thanks for explaining Leorio.”

“No problem, doll face.”

Kurapika glanced between her and Leorio. “Why would it be embarrassing? To me you’re light as a feather.”

The girl looked down at herself. Being heavy wasn’t the only thing she was worried about.

She was terrified her thighs would squish his face too tight, or tummy would press again his head.

‘God men are dense. They don’t have a single thought behind those eyes.’

She finally sighed, climbing up the ladder. “Alright…”

Kurapika walked over and turned. She hooked a leg over his shoulder and he pulled her close, her thighs instantly squishing his cheeks.

‘Oh no.’

He hadn’t thought about how her pussy would be flush against his neck, and thighs wrapped around his face. Kurapika’s face instantly turned red, incredibly grateful his lower half was under water.

“Is this alright?” She asked, flustered herself. He only gave her a nod, not able to speak.

Gon and Killua approached the two, a menacing aura surrounding the boys.

“What’s the rules?” Gon asked, suddenly very serious.

“No touching the person carrying, and no nen.”

Killua nodded at (Name)’s words. “Fair enough.”

The two pairs stood across from each other, (Name) absentmindedly petting Kurapika’s head.

“Enjoying yourself up there, (Name)?”

She ruffled his hair in response, the blonde chuckling.

Killua gagged. “Ew, save the flirting for after the fight.”

The two blushed, Kurapika’s grip nearly slipping from (Name)’s thighs. She quickly returned his hands to her thighs. “H-hey, careful! I’ll slip off!”

“Sorry, sorry.”

‘Flirting? I wasn’t…’

Kurapika didn’t have time to think. Gon stepped forward and Killua raised his hands to push (Name). Kurapika quickly stepped out of the way, Killua nearly falling off of Gon’s shoulders.

“Crap, Gon turn to the left!”

Killua was finally able to reach (Name) and give her a push. The girl gasped, her thighs squishing against Kurapika’s face to try and regain balance.

“Mmph…”

Kurapika could feel his pants tighten, his grip on her thighs tightening. He was coming to the realization that he MUCH enjoyed the feeling of being in between her thighs.

Once she regained balance, (Name) gave Killua a push of his own. “You little brat, I’m gonna-“

One final push from Killua sent her flying off Kurapika and crashing into the water.

“Oh shit I used way too much strength- (Name)!”

Killua jumped from Gon’s shoulders and into the water. Kurapika had already moved to pull her up by the arm, the woman coughing.

“Yikes Killua, knocked the air from my lungs…”

Kurapika helped her to the edge of the pool, getting her to sit down. He was still in the water, checking over her with worried eyes.

“Are you hurt anywhere?”

Leorio walked over, having seen what happened. “You alright? You hit the water like a cannonball.”

(Name) groaned. “Leorio please don’t compare me to a cannonball, I’m going to throw up.”

She leaned back against the ground, Kurapika snickering. “Yeah Leorio, how rude of you.”

Killua hovered over the girl, crouching down to poke her cheek. “Sorry, (Name). I got too excited.”

She pushed his hand away. “It’s alright, I’m-“

Her nose started to bleed, causing all four of the boys to crowd around her.

“Jesus, are you-“

Leorio lifted her up into a sitting position. “Sit up, you’ll choke on the blood.”

He examined her as Kurapika and Gon exited the pool, waiting for Leorio’s opinion.

“She’s fine, just got water in her nose when she fell. Must of irritated her so she got a nose bleed.”

He pulled her to her feet.

“I’m gonna take a break from pool time. You boys have fun, okay?”

She walked over to the table and Leorio handed her some tissues.

Kurapika glanced from (Name) to Killua. The white haired boy looked like a guilty mess.

“She’ll be alright, Killua! She’s been through worse.”

Killua’s head whipped towards the black haired boy, sending him a look. This instantly made Kurapika suspicious.

“Gon, what do you mean by that?”

Gon slapped both of his hands over his mouth, Killua answering for him. “He means when she fought during the Final Phase of the exam. She broke her leg, remember?”

Kurapika DID remember.

flashback

(Name) had to fight Illumi, who at the time they knew as Gittarackur. Kurapika, Killua, and Leorio watched as the two entered the ring, cheering for their friend.

“You got this (Name)! Beat his scary looking ass!” Leorio yelled out. Kurapika glanced between the two in the ring, his heart thumping against his chest.

He wasn’t sure why, but he couldn’t keep his eyes off of her. (Name) had proven herself to be capable, but the man she was fighting had the aura of a killer.

“Ready, start!”

(Name) crouched into a fighting stance. Gittarackur seemed to observe her for a moment before walking forward calmly.

“If you give up now, I will not have to hurt you. I’d prefer to win quickly.”

(Name) faltered for a second, a look of confusion crossing over her face. “Why would I give up so quickly? I’m here for a r-“

Gittarackur didn’t give her chance to finish her sentence. He was already pinning her to the ground, his hand squeezing her throat as she clawed at his hands.

“Ah, I can’t kill you, can I? Hmm…”

He pulled his hand back just before she was about to pass out. Kurapika felt a hand on his arm, his eyes darting to the left to see Leorio.

“Kurapika, you’re moving forward.”

The blonde blinked before looking down to see he’d taken several steps forward before Leorio had stopped him. He hadn’t even noticed that his body began to move on his own.

Kurapika was still reeling from watching Gon’s fight, so he assumed that’s why he had moved. Leorio kept his grip on his arm as their attention turned back to (Name)’s fight.

“I’ll say it again. Give up, and you’ll leave without any permanent damage.”

Kurapika internally seethed. The man was leering down at (Name) like she was a mouse and he was a cat that had caught her in his paws.

‘Just give up, there’s plenty of other chances.’ He thought, biting his lip.

“I’m not giving up anytime soon.”

The man didn’t react, only moved his hand down her body slowly until his palm rested against her leg.

“Last chance.”

The two stared at each other, (Name) not saying anything. If Gon could withstand the beating he had, there was no reason she couldn’t.

The sound of bones breaking filled the air, along with (Name)’s anguished scream.

“(Name)!”

Kurapika rushed forward, having to be physically restrained by Killua and Leorio. The two other boys were barely able to hold themselves back at the sight of (Name)’s pained expression.

“This could have been avoided, you know. I did warn you…”

He tapped his finger against the broken limb, humming to himself. Each tap caused the girl to gasp out, holding her hands over her mouth to prevent herself from throwing up.

“Mmm… should we move on to the next leg? Or are you ready to gi-“

(Name) used her unbroken leg to slam into the side of his face, rolling onto her stomach. She grit her teeth as she struggled to get to her feet.

“(Name), just stop! Please!”

It was Killua this time, his cries surprising Leorio and Kurapika. The white haired boy clutched the fabric of his shirt as (Name) struggled in vain to get up.

“I didn’t think you had any fight left in you. Interesting.”

The kick had done little to no damage to Gittarackur’s face. The man crouched back down in front of the struggling girl. He pulled her up by her hair and looked into her hazy eyes.

“I can’t kill you, and you won’t give up. How annoying, will I have to beat you into submission?”

He held her easily, as if she were just a doll. “Guess you will, if you can.”

She dig her nails into his skin, staring into his eyes. “I’m not giving up, so we’re going to be going at this for a while.”

The man tilted his head before dropping her onto the floor. “Oh dear, I don’t have time for that. I guess I’ll just forfeit and try again.”

For good measure, he stepped on her broken leg as he left the ring.

Kurapika ran to her side, Leorio close behind. “(Name) you idiot, look at you…”

Killua appeared next to her, crouching down to look at her leg.

“Still… won…”

She sat up quickly, and Leorio held her hair as she threw up. Kurapika watched on in anger, his eyes scarlet.

This was the first time he witnessed (Name) throw herself into harms way, and it wouldn’t be the last.

flashback end

At the time, Kurapika hadn’t known (Name) as well so he hadn’t been as angry, but now, just thinking about the sound of her bone shattering was enough to make his body tremble in anger.

“I remember. She… she’s stubborn.”

“Yeah, both of them aware.”

Killua and Kurapika glanced at Gon and (Name).

——————

It was lunch time, and everyone but (Name) was playing in the pool. The boys had finally convinced Leorio to join them for a game of Chicken Fight, Kurapika on his shoulders.

Currently, the two pairs were tied. They’d both won twice before (Name) approached the pool.

“Alright boys, it’s time for lunch. You can continue after.”

Gon and Killua waded out of the pool and dashed to (Name)’s table. Kurapika and Leorio took a little longer.

“Boys, no running by the pool! You’re going to bust your heads open!”

She grabbed the two by their ears and marched them to the table.

“Hey- ow!”

The two were sat down, rubbing their ears. Kurapika held back a snicker, finding Killua’s pouty face hilarious.

(Name) handed out sandwiches and bags of chips, setting a container of slices fruit in the middle of the table for people to take from.

“There’s drinks in the cooler. Boys, don’t you even think about touching the beer. That’s for Leorio.”

“Wasn’t planning on it.” Killua replied, grabbing a soda.

They ate as a group, Kurapika on one side of (Name) and Killua on the other.

As they ate, another group drove into the parking lot. (Name) only glanced up for a second before continuing her lunch.

“Killua, Gon, be on your best behavior. No drowning anyone and NO I don’t care if it’s accidental.”

“But it really was an accident last t-“

The woman held up her hand, silencing Gon.

As the group finished their lunch, the other group of people filed into the pool. They were all men, ranging from 18-27 years old.

(Name) didn’t pay much attention to them, focusing on packing up their basket and reapplying everyone’s sunscreen.

The boys went back to playing in the pool, (Name) glancing up from her romance novel to check on them every few minutes. They seemed to be having fun, she hadn’t seen Kurapika so happy and carefree since the Hunter Exam.

“Hey, how you doing?”

(Name) placed her bookmark on the page she’s been reading and looked up to see a few of the men had approached her.

“I’m, uh, doing well. How about you?” she answered hesitantly. The ring leader of the group smiled down at her, his eyes trained on her chest.

“Better now that I’m talking to you, little lady.”

(Name) visibly cringed at this, pulling her towel around herself. “Is there anything I can help you with?”

The man’s eye twitched a bit at her annoyed tone, but his smile didn’t falter.

“You could help us by giving me your number. Not everyday I see a woman like you around these parts.”

(Name) glanced to the pool, seeing none of them had noticed the men surrounding her. She thought of what to do for a moment.

“Um… no thank you. I don’t give my numbers out to strangers.”

The man tilted his head, acting offended. “Aww, we don’t have to be strangers. Let’s change that!”

He reached forward and placed a hand on her shoulder. She moved to wrench herself free, but his grip was like iron.

“Shh, don’t struggle. I ain’t gonna hurt you if you play nice.”

(Name) considered her options. She could use her nen and at least take out the man with his grip on her, but by the looks of the men around him, they were ready to grab her if she attempted to escape.

“Get your hands off of her.”

(Name) sighed in relief as Kurapika came into view, his hair still wet from the pool.

“Buddy, I’m not sure who this woman is to you but she’s coming with us. Back off, and no one gets hurt.”

Kurapika glanced to (Name), his eyebrow raised. ‘Are they being serious?’

Killua stood next to Kurapika, his hands behind his head. “Should we kill them?”

“No, Killua, no killing.” (Name) called out.

“It’s hard not to when they’re threatening to kidnap you.” Killua replied, his nails sharpening into claws.

Gon and Leorio were nowhere to be seen.

“I’ll give you men to the count of 10 to get to your car before hell breaks loose.”

Kurapika stretched a bit as he spoke.

“One.”

The men laughed, the ringleader shaking (Name) by the shoulder.

“Two.”

“He’s being serious! That’s fucking hilarious.”

“Three.”

Killua began to walk forward, his eyes narrowing.

“Four.”

(Name) tried to slip from the man’s grasp, but was quickly subdued by her grabbing her chin. “Stay still, you little bitch.”

“Five.”

Kurapika’s eyes began to turn scarlet as he watched the man grab her roughly.

“Six.”

The sound of someone creeping towards the men could be heard.

“Seven.”

Leorio and Gon jumped into view, wielding the water guns (Name) had bought Gon and Killua for Christmas last year.

“Eight.”

The two cocked their guns, pointing them at the men.

“Nine.”

Killua reached the first man, who immediately swung at the young boy.

“Ten.”

Everything happened at once. Killua threw the man into the water and grabbed (Name) so quickly she could barely think.

Leorio and Gon pulled the triggers on their guns, spraying the group of men in something that smelled AWFUL.

Kurapika reached the man that had grabbed (Name) and pulled his arm back to pin him to the ground.

It all happened with 10 seconds, surprising both (Name) and the men that had previously surrounded her.

“We gave you a chance, you scum.” Kurapika whispered, contemplating breaking the man’s arm. It made him sick that this filth had its hands on (Name).

“P-please, let me go! I wasn’t going to anything, promise!”

The blonde hummed. “Really? It sure seemed like you were planning on taking her without her consent.”

(Name) placed a hand on Kurapika’s shoulder. “Kurapika, he’s not worth it. Just let it go.”

He glanced from her hand to the man trembling beneath him before he sighed.

“Get out of my sight.”

The group of men scrambled into the parking lot, gone before the blink of an eye.

“Wow, scared the shit out of them, didn’t you Kurapika?”

Leorio stood next to him with his water gun slung over his shoulder. (Name) covered her nose at the smell of the liquid seeping out.

“Yikes, what the hell did you spray them with? It wasn’t… pee was it?”

“(Name), you think so little of us.”

She groaned. “What was it then?”

Gon held up an empty bottle of beer, beaming. “Just some hot beer!”

“Gon, put that down.”

“Yes ma’am.”

Kurapika hovered over (Name), his eyes pouring over her body. “They didn’t hurt you, did they?”

She shook her head. “No, no, I’m fine. Just… I think I’m ready to go home.”

(Name) wrapped the towel around herself a little tighter.

“I understand. Go wait in the car, we’ll get everything packed up.”

Killu and Gon followed (Name) to the car, just to make sure nothing happened in the parking lot. The men were long gone, but they weren’t taking any chances.

“Sorry your day was ruined.” Killua said as he climbed in. (Name) sighed.

“It’s not your fault, Killua. No one could have expected that.”

He hadn’t just been talking about that, Killua still felt incredibly guilty about pushing her too hard. After that, she hadn’t gotten back in the pool. To him, that meant she didn’t get to have as much fun.

“… I guess.”

Gon tried to lighten up the mood. “Hey guys want to hear about the newest reptile species that’s been discovered?”

——————

Leorio hoisted the cooler onto his shoulder with ease. “You got the rest?”

Kurapika gave him a curt nod. “Yes, go ahead. I’ll be there in a moment.”

Leorio left to pack up the ice chest, leaving Kurapika to pick up the picnic basket and other scattered personal items.

As he bent over to pick up (Name)’s towel, he spotted a book under the table.

‘Is that the book (Name) had been reading?’

He pulled it out from under the table and gave it a once over. It had a removable cloth slip that hid the cover, their causing the blonde to raise an eyebrow.

‘Why would she need to hide the cover?’

He noticed there was a bookmark noting where (Name) had stopped reading.

‘Mm… I’ll just take a quick peak.’

He opened the book, his eyes scanning over the words.

He slipped his fingers into her dripping cunt, smirking when it drew a moan from her lips.

“Does that feel good, sweetheart? You’re so-“

Kurapika slammed the book shut, his entire face going red.

It took him a moment to process when he had just read.

‘Does… (Name) like these types of books?’

She’d definitely been reading it earlier. How had she kept such a neutral expression while reading such smutty acts?

Kurapika carefully dropped the book into her basket, making sure the bookmark was in place. He didn’t want her knowing he’d seen her dirty little secret.

Not yet.

He was able to keep his growing hard on a secret by wrapping a towel around himself. No one would question it, considering he was still dripping wet.

“Kurapika, hurry up, Gon won’t stop talking about reptiles!”

“Coming!”

——————

The group arrived home, (Name) walking up the stairs to take a shower. She’d been more quiet than usual on the way home, and the boys were worried.

“It makes sense, she did get harassed by a bunch of creeps only 30 minutes ago.”

Leorio wasn’t wrong, but it seemed like more than that. Killua glanced up the stairs with a sigh.

“Yeah… I guess.”

Gon and Kurapika sat in the living room watching the news. The blonde pretended to pay attention to the boy rambling next to him, but his mind was still on that book.

“Alright, we’re doing takeout tonight. What’s everyone in the mood for?”

(Name) had descended the stairs, wearing a pair of sweatpants and tank top, with a towel holding back her wet hair.

“Burgers.”

“Pancakes.”

“Chicken.”

“I don’t care.”

(Name) held onto the stairwell railing, her other hand pinching the bridge of her nose. “Well. I can only think of one place that serves all of those things, and it’s only dine-in.”

“Then let’s go eat!” Gon exclaimed, jumping to his feet. He ran to put on his boots and Killua joined him.

“I just put the clothes o- never mind. Go get in the car, I’m going to change.”

“Why do you need to change?”

(Name) glanced up at Leorio before pointing to her chest. “No bra.”

Without another word she began to climb upstairs, the two men glancing between each other.

‘No bra…’

Kurapika thought back to when he’d fallen asleep on her chest. Was she wearing a bra then? Would it have been even softer if she hadn’t been?

‘Stop. If you keep thinking about this, you’ll just get hard again.’

He pulled the fabric of his sweatpants a bit to hide himself.

——————

“Welcome to Wafflehouse, sit where you’d like!”

The group of five sat at a nearby booth, Gon and Leorio on one side, Killua, (Name), and Kurapika on the other.

“Why do you always get to sit by (Name), Kurapika?” Leorio asked with a pout.

“No offense Leorio, but you have really long legs. If I say next to you we’d both be squished.”

Leorio smirked. “Who said that was an issue-“

Kurapika reached over and smacked him on the head. “And that’s another reason you can’t sit next to (Name).”

Killua tapped his nails against the table, his head leaning against (Name)’s shoulder. “We’ve been sitting here for 15 minutes. I’m bored.”

“Hi bored I’m (Name).”

The white haired boy groaned and turned to pout at her.

“Sorry, sorry. I’ll go ask at the counter.”

Kurapika moved so (Name) could slip out of the booth.

“Have you guys heard the news?”

The other three stared at Killua, who had suddenly grown very serious.

“What news?” Kurapika asked with his eyebrow raised.

“There’s something (Name) wants to do entirely for herself.”

Leorio and Gon jumped up in surprise. “For herself? That’s new.”

‘Does she never do anything for her own enjoyment?’ Kurapika thought.

Killua nodded. “She wants to see a movie next weekend. I heard her talking to her friend about it. She seems really excited.”

“What movie is it?” Kurapika asked. Killua shook his head.

“She didn’t say, all I know is she plans on asking us if we want to go Friday. From what I heard she wants us to go with her. I can get the movie title before then so we can prepare.”

Leorio nodded. “I’ll be free next weekend, so I can go. What about you?”

The rest nodded. “Then we’re in agreement.”

(Name) walked back a minute later, a smile on her face. “She’ll be here to take our orders soon! I went ahead and placed an order for our drinks.”

Kurapika gave her a smile before moving out of the way for her to slide back in.

The waitress brought their drinks a moment later and took their order.

A man walked past the group and sat in the booth in front of them silently. None of them even glanced up to look at him.

“(Name), can I play on your phone?”

She nodded and opened her phone, clicking off a few things before handing it over.

“Yay!”

Gon began to play some random game she’d downloaded just for him as they continued waiting.

“Hey there, Miss.”

(Name) looked up to see the man who’d sat in the booth in front of them standing before them.

“Hello?” she answered, earning a quick frown from him.

“I wasn’t talking to you.”

She gave him a confused looked before following his gaze.

Oh.

“You, with the blonde hair. You’re awfully pretty, would you mind if I paid for your dinner in exchange for your number?”

Kurapika blinked before meeting the man’s eye.

“Excuse you?”

The man smiled. “I’ll pay for your friends too, I don’t mind.”

Leorio snickered from across the booth, his fist smacking against the table. Killua wasn’t doing much better, his hand covering his mouth to quiet his laugh.

“Mister, Kurapika isn’t a girl.” Gon said, confused.

The man blinked before laughing. “Aww, that’s a good one. No man can be that pretty.”

“I guess I’m an exception.”

Kurapika stared up at him with those cold eyes, talking in the deepest voice he could manage. The man instantly realized that the boy had in fact been right.

That pretty blonde he’d just hit on was not a girl, but a twink.

The man stuttered out an apology before leaving the Waffle House.

“Pretty girl…”

Killua bursted into laughter, Leorio following his lead. (Name) glanced to see Kurapika’s irritated expression, and she even caught a hint of embarrassment flick across his eyes.

“Kurapika…”

She placed her hand on his, the man stiffening ever so slightly. “You’re a pretty boy.”

If anyone else had said this, it would have just pissed him off further, but coming from (Name)’s mouth it sounded soft and sweet.

“… thank you, (Name).”

He placed his other hand over hers and squeezed it between his two palms gently. “I appreciate that.”

(Name) sent Leorio and Killua a look, causing the two to quiet down.

“Well I don’t think you look like a girl! You smell way too much like a guy!”

“What does that even mean?”

“You’re sweaty and gross.” Killua replied.

“Killua!”

“… sorry.”

Their food was brought out soon after. They ate, paid, and left as soon as they could.

[malii-the-bonehead]

The Other Woman pt6

Heres Part 6, finallyyyyy.

Slow burn

Summary: Chris, a popular hockey player at school where Y/n went, found himself falling for the beautiful, shy girl. As time went on he found out who Y/n truly was as a person and ultimately, he had to make the choice, his girlfriend, or the other woman.

Part 6

Monday came by quicker than I had hoped. When I woke up that morning I felt so sick. I had a throbbing headache and my stomach was killing me. I had been up for probably 30 minutes before I had rushed to the bathroom to vomit the acids in my stomach, since I hadn’t eaten anything since yesterday afternoon. 

Yeah, I was not going to school today. I also called work and explained the situation. My boss was understanding. She told me to take as much time as I needed.

I turned off my lights and put the mini trash can from my bathroom next to my bed. I flipped onto my side, facing the edge of my bed in case I had to lean over and puke again. I curled up and held my stomach, feeling the pain finally take over.

– 

I woke up from the sound of my door being opened harshly. I groaned and opened my eyes. My mom was standing in my doorway.

“Y/n, what are you still doing here? It’s Monday. You have school.”

I explained to her how I wasn’t feeling well. She walked out of the room and came back with some water and medicine for me to take.

“Rest up then, kiddo.” She kissed my forehead. “If you need anything, just call me.” She pushed my hair out of my face then turned to leave the room. I checked my phone to see what time it was.

It was 11:30. They had 3 new messages. 2 of them from Chris and 1 of them from my dad. I checked the one from my dad first.

When you coming visit? I miss yall. Don’t be a stranger, Y/n. Text me back when you can. I love you.

I sighed and closed out of the message, then clicked Chris’s contact. I looked at his message, soon responding after reading them. 

Why aren’t you in 3rd hour? Are you here today? Soon after his first message he had sent, Hello?? 

I typed back, Sorry, Chris. I’ve been sleeping all morning. I’m sick with what I think is the stomach flu. But I should be back by Wednesday or Thursday. 

I shut off my phone. I wasn’t tired anymore so I grabbed my TV remote and played some music. I sat up in my bed and grabbed my school bag from the floor. I opened it and grabbed my computer, checking my school work I had missed for the day. I had probably 4 assignments. Soon after starting my first assignment, my phone buzzed. I picked it up and checked the message. Chris had texted back rather quickly. 

Send me your address. I’ll bring you some food and medicine. I laid back on my pillow, smiling like a 14 year old with a crush. I practically kicked my feet at his message. To be honest, I knew I’d get to this point with Chris. Where I would fall for him. But I think a part of me had always liked Chris. Even just seeing him walk past me in the hallways would always make my heart hurt, I just never realized I actually liked him until he talked to me the first time. I sent him a message back.

No, don’t worry about it. I should be fine but thank you. He read it. I sat waiting for his message for a while before I figured he wasn’t texting back. I shut off my phone and started working on my school assignments once again.

It took me about 2 hours to do everything I had missed. By the time I finished, school would have been 10 minutes from the final bell ringing. Chris had never texted back. I was kind of bummed about it, but tried not to think about it too much. 

I got up out of my bed and immediately felt a wave of dizziness overcome me. I rushed to the bathroom, emptying my already empty stomach once again. I sat on the bathroom floor for a good 20 minutes, too scared to move. Throwing up was definitely my least favorite thing. 

My mom came knocking on the bathroom door once I hit the 25 minute mark. Not that anyone was counting, except for me. 

I flushed the toilet and pushed myself against the wall. “You can come in.”

“Are you sure? Someone’s here to see you.”

My eyes furrowed in confusion. The bathroom door opened after a few seconds of silence. I saw my mom, water bottle in hand. She walked in, sitting next to me. After she sat down she called out, “Don’t be shy, we don’t bite.” She giggled and pushed my shoulder softly. I just looked at her, then towards the door. 

“I brought you some food and things to help with your stomach.” Chris walked in. My eyes widened and I tried to quickly stand up. The second I felt dizzy, I collapsed back into the position I was in again. Mom ran her fingers through my hair. Then she started to rub big circles into my back. Chris put the toilet seat down and sat on it. He was now in front of me holding a bag of food and medicine. “I didn’t know what kind of food you ate but Alice said you liked strawberries and toaster strudels so I grabbed a few packs of everything.”

Yep, I was for sure going to kill Alice. He pulled out of the bag a packet of medicine and a sweet tea, as well as a pepsi. He left the food in the bag but placed it on the counter next to my sink. He read the back of the packet and took out 2 pills, handing them to me along with the sweet tea. 

“How did you get here? I didn’t tell you where I lived.” I grabbed the things from his hands. My face was flushed and I was hot. I probably looked like a mess. My face was pale and my cheeks were red. My hair was a mess and I was wearing fuzzy socks and some shorts with a hoodie. It was hot and I was sweaty.

“That was also Alice. She’s very helpful.” He laughed and rubbed the back of his neck. My mom put her hand on my knee. I looked at her.

“Say thank you, Y/n. He came all this way for you.”

My head was throbbing. “Thank you,” I mumbled. 

“I’ll leave you alone.” Mom stood up and walked to the bathroom door. “Yell if you need anything.” She walked out, leaving only me and Chris in the small bathroom.

Chris held his hand to my forehead. “Yeah, you’re definitely sick. You’re burning up. Where do you keep your towels?” I pointed to the cabinets under the sink. He got up and rummaged through the cabinet before pulling out a small black towel and running it under the cold water from the sink. He rang it out then placed it on my head. I went to grab it but he pushed my hand away, holding his hand and the towel to my forehead. 

“Thank you, Chris.”

He smiled and sat next to me, replacing the spot mom was previously in. 

“You know, 3rd hour was soooo boring without you.” He dragged out the so, making it seem way too dramatic. I looked at him. He pushed the hair out of my face and tucked the strands behind my ears. “Can I put your hair up for you?” I nodded my head.

“Let’s go to my room first. I’ve been here way too long.” Chris got up first, grabbing my hand to help me get up. If I wasn’t in so much pain, I would have been so nervous. 

He led me out the door and to my bed. He let go of my hand and grabbed my desk chair. He pulled it to the side of my bed next to me. I turned my back to him, handing him the hair tie on my wrist. I held the towel to my head.

He gathered all my hair and pulled it back into a ponytail. He was very gentle. So gentle I almost didn’t feel it. “There, that’s better”

I felt my face heat up. I shifted and turned back to face him. He got up and went back to the bathroom, soon coming back with the bag of food in his hand. He placed it on my bed next to me. I rummaged through it, grabbing the pack of strawberries. They looked so good. 

“Here,” I handed him a strawberry. He took it and ate it. I also grabbed one and ate it. They were so sweet. 

“You have a nice room. It really describes who you are.” I looked at him puzzled.

“That is a good thing, right?”

He nodded his head at me. A few seconds passed but it felt like minutes.

“You know, you really didn’t have to come here for me. I’m grateful, but you could have been doing better things.” I looked at him. He was studying my room, looking around and messing with the trinkets on my side table. 

“I don’t mind. I wanted to see you anyway.” He looked at me, his head tilted. He had a grin on his face. My face was red once again. I kept eating the strawberries silently, offering some to Chris whenever he had finished his last. I grabbed the remote from my bed and turned off the music that had been playing for the past few hours. Now the room was completely silent. It was a comfortable silence. Something about Chris being here was making my heart calm down. My stomach started to feel better. 

He looked at me for a while before saying, “Alice is worried about you too. You should text her. Let her know you’re okay.” I smiled at him. 

“For being sick, you’re still really beautiful.” He pushed my hair back. I removed the towel from my head and put it on the empty spot next to me. I grabbed his hand from my hair. I dropped our hands into my lap and fiddled our fingers together. I played with his hand, but it didn't seem like he minded. I lifted our hands, placing one of mine against his. His were bigger than mine, only by a little bit. We both looked at our hands. I interlocked our fingers. I don’t know why I did that, but he didn’t pull away. We looked at each other. 

He’s so beautiful. So much prettier than me, that’s for sure.

I put our hands down on my bed. Our fingers were still wrapped around each other. 

“Why is it that everytime you come around, I get nervous?” I looked at him.

“I don’t know.” He responded slowly. “But, I think you make me nervous too. I get a tingly feeling around you.” His small confession caught my attention.

My eyes widened. “I get a tingly feeling too. Right.. Here.” I placed his hand on my heart. He held it there, feeling my heart beat. 

“Your heart’s racing.”

“I know.”

He looked at me and moved his hand away. He grabbed mine and placed it on his heart.

His heart is racing too. I felt my body go numb.

“Mine’s beating fast too, isn’t it.” He said that as more of a statement than anything. 

My breath hitched. I scanned over his face. His cheeks were a light pink. His hair was slicked back into a baseball hat, a little bit sticking out by his ears. He looked so good. I looked at his eyes then down to his lips. He noticed it and I moved my hand away.

I want to kiss him. God, I want to kiss him so fucking bad. 

I looked back to his eyes, his finding mine. I looked away from him. 

You’re sick, Y/n. No, that’s not important, he has a girlfriend. A beautiful and sweet girlfriend. Someone who doesn’t deserve anything less than Chris. Someone who is way better for him than you could ever imagine. 

Chris and Clairissa were perfect together. They’ve been dating since the beginning of our junior year. Everyone knew who they were and who they belonged to. It would be a sin to separate them. 

Chris spoke, pulling me from my thoughts. 

“I guess I should get going soon. I have a hockey game tonight. You should come.” I looked back at him.

“I know you aren’t feeling well, but if you end up feeling better, come watch it. It starts at 7 at the rink.” 

“I’ll think about it.” I smiled softly. He smiled back and patted my head. He stood up and pushed the chair back to its original spot. Chris walked to the door of my room, opening it. 

“If I don’t see you later, text me.” 

I looked down at my lap. “I will. Thank you again, Christopher.” He grinned.

“Anything for the pretty lady.” My head snapped up. There it was again. He called me pretty again. He turned and shut the door. Soon after, my door opened again and mom walked in. She practically skipped over to my bed, a big smile on her face. She pushed my shoulder softly again.

“He was cute,” She wiggled her eyebrows at me and giggled like a little girl. I smiled and sighed. 

“I know.”

[missbubblesoda]

early in the morning, especially when it rains, and a little before noon. (13)

erwin x fem!reader

chapters: (1) | (2) | (3) | (4) | (5) | (6) | (7) | (8) | (9) | (10) | (11) | (12) | (14) | (15) | (16) | (17) | (18) | (19) | (20) | (21) | (22) | (23) | (24) | (25) | (26) | (27)

summary: I basically took Isayama’s work, forced it into a romance story, and made Erwin the love interest. Commander meets cadet and they fall in love (not instantly though)

notes: very berry canonverse (but some events were modified to fit my narrative), wasn’t intended to be this long, but it all is in the details right?

content warnings: smut where it fits (or where I make it fit. Also, reader is NOT underage, so likewise, MINORS DO NOT INTERACT, please.) slow burn (I really mean it. I’m not olympic diving into any form of smut for the first chapters.) no angst. I dislike angst. I would never. I could never. (Although angst can be somewhat subjective so take it with a grain of salt?)

wc: 2.7k

“I mean, if that’s something you’re comfortable talking about.” You rushed to add, fearing your question might open old wounds. “We don’t have to talk about it if-”

“No, it’s fine. You told me about your family, it’s only fair that I tell you about mine.” His eyes scanned the ceiling, as if trying to find the starting paragraph to a really long, complex story. He then took a deep breath and said: “My father, his beard was always unkempt and so was his mustache.” You chuckled lightly, tickled by the unexpected and rather random beginning he chose for his story. “He disliked loneliness. Not only when it came to people, but also objects. He didn’t like it when things looked lonely. If he passed by a bakery and there was only one loaf of bread left at the end of the day, he would buy it even though we had enough at home. If there was a book alone on a table, he would place it in a group with the others.” If your eyes hadn’t been glued to him the way they were, scanning every inch of his face, trying to read all the sentences you knew he was purposely leaving out of his story, you would have missed the way his lips twitched as they tried but failed to compose a smile.

“He rarely got drunk, but when he did, his habit of bringing lonely things home would only worsen. One time, I woke up in the middle of the night, startled by a noise that to my sleepy 8-year-old self sounded like a woman crying.” He said, as you shuffled against him, having no clue where this story was going. “Scared, I looked out the window only to see my father trying to push a cow inside the house.” You opened your mouth in disbelief. “He said the poor animal was all alone in a field, looking like it could use a friend. The next day, he had a hard time explaining to our neighbors that he wasn’t trying to steal their cow.”

“Well, that alone tells me a lot about him.” You said, the thought of a perplexed, golden-haired boy in his pajamas, and an equally confused thousand-pound cow being forced through a small door in the middle of the night making you chuckle. “What did he do for a living?”

“He was teacher.”

“Let me guess, History.” His eyes widened, head tilted to the side, asking you to explain your deduction as well as the conviction present in your voice. “I mean, that would explain a lot of things, including your love for History as well as all these books.” You said, pointing at the shelves that covered the walls of his room.

“These are not books. The ones in my office are. But these… these are just things I write.”

“All of them? You mean as in journals?”

He nodded before explaining: “Writing helps me clear my head, especially after expeditions. When we come back from a mission, time moves on and so does life, at least for those who survive. But what about those who don’t?” The question seemed to be directed at the air and not particularly at you. “What about those who never make it back home?” He paused for a moment, seemingly letting the taste of those words linger on his tongue like bitter lemon, before continuing. “When my men die out there, they are not really left behind. They are forever immortalized in the pages of these journals. It’s my way of remembering them, of making sure their sacrifice doesn’t go to waste.” Your eyes paced around his room, things slowly taking on a whole new meaning, and you wondered how much anguish and sorrow were trapped in the pages of those journals. “They stay behind and trust us, the living, to go on and find meaning in their deaths.”

You stared into the flickering flames of the fireplace without speaking, but simply, quietly understanding. Understanding that writing was his way of finding meaning, of making sense of it all. Understanding that a scout’s life was never easy, you knew that from the get go, but it was then and there where you finally and fully comprehended the dimensions of the position you held, the implications of the path you had chosen. And, when your vision started to get blurry, and your mind, to wonder if one day you would become a character in one of those dreadful entries, you decided it was time to change the topic.

“So! Your father was a teacher.”

“Yes, and I was in his class.” He paused for a moment, the space he decided to leave between each word, as well as the calmness in his voice, reminding you of trees after a violent rainstorm, battered and partially uprooted, but still standing somehow, or at least trying to. “One day, he was talking about how humanity was forced to take refuge within the walls to protect themselves from the Titans, and how that bought them 100 years of peace.” There was something about his voice that took you back to a rainy day, ten or fifteen years ago, sitting by the classroom window, only that this time your head wasn’t propped on your hand, your pencil wasn’t tapping on the desk, and your mind wasn’t lost somewhere far away, wondering when you would be able to go home. Because this time, the commander was the one speaking, and his voice, while monotonous and gentle, had the spark required to narrate the longest of stories without losing the audience’s interest in the process. A rare skill you had known only one more person to have: Hitch. That, paired with his ability to explain complex things, made you think he would make a great History professor; and you couldn’t help but wonder how different his life would have looked like had he chosen to follow his father’s footsteps.

“In doing so, any records of our earlier past were lost for all of time.” His voice pulled you back to the present, and you nodded, both to signal you were following his story, and to shake the vivid pictures that had started flooding your imagination, vivid pictures of him coming home after work to a warm dinner on the table, to his family, to a beautiful house in some small village or to a cozy cabin in the middle of some quiet forest, instead of this lonely office trapped between walls of cold stone. An alternate reality where he wouldn’t have to wake up in the middle of the night, drenched in sweat, startled by nightmares of titans tailing behind him, trying to devour him and his men.

“At least, that’s what we’re all taught.” You looked at him, your brow furrowing in suspicion, sensing there was more to this story. He seemed to be trying to decide what he would say next. Or whether to say it at all. And before you could tell him it was okay if he didn’t want to say more, he decided to continue. “I… having doubts of my own, asked my father a question. At first, he evaded answering and ended class as normal. But after we got home, he answered my doubts. He said the history books given by the government were full of contradictions and mysteries.” Something about that last line reminded you of a conversation you had with your own father a while ago, about those government conspiracy theories he was so intrigued by. But you didn’t want to interrupt, so you just nodded and let the commander go on.

“My father continued to tell me more, and even as a child, I was astounded. You see, there’s a reason he didn’t tell that story to the entire class, but I wasn’t smart enough to know.”

“You told the story to someone else.”

He nodded. “To other neighborhood kids. And one day, the Military Police came to question me.” He was looking straight into the fireplace, as if having a staring contest with the flames. Almost as if someone was standing in the middle of the flames, staring back at him, and he wasn’t allowed to break eye contact. You thought about the scenery reflected in his eyes. The blue in his eyes mirroring the bright, red fire, as well as glimpses of an emotion he had never displayed in front of you before. Slight anger, maybe. “My father didn’t come home that day… And I haven’t seen him ever since. He died in some accident in a faraway town. Or so I was told.” He added, sadness scattered around his eyes like stars in the dark night sky.

His words reverberated inside the silent room, spreading across the available space, reaching every corner, and stabbing every inch of your heart in the process. You had somehow deducted his father wasn’t around anymore, so when he started narrating the story you hadn’t expected it to have a happy ending. This, however, was way beyond your imagination. This was downright traumatizing, another level of disturbing for sure. And you felt horrible for asking him to pick at a wound that had barely even scabbed at all. But you also knew that his father hadn’t died in an ‘accident’. “Based on what I knew-”

“The government. He was silenced by the government.” You concluded, words leaving your mouth at the exact same time the thought was born.

He nodded again before continuing his story. “One hundred and seven years ago, humanity that fled into these walls… The king had altered their memories to make them easy to rule. That was my father’s theory.” You had never listened to this part of the story before. It was as if important pages had been ripped off the history books you studied at school. And the whole sensation was very odd. It left your mouth dry and your skin shivering. It was like finding there was an alternate ending to a book you had read a hundred times. One you never knew existed. A darker one.

He didn’t say anything, and you felt he was giving you time to process everything and reach your own conclusions.

“Because if he hadn’t done that, civilization within the walls could never succeed.” You finally said.

“Exactly. Ever since I was a child, I’ve been thinking… Why did my father have to die for nothing more than getting close to the truth?” He asked, and you knew this time he wasn’t talking to the air nor to you, but to himself, his voice and the emotions behind it raising like water reaching its boiling point. “Even those in the government would believe what they’re doing is just. However, I realized one thing about them: What they’re trying to protect is not humanity.”

“It’s their gardens, houses, and land.” You completed the sentence before he could, having lived far too many years around them to know what their most precious possessions are.

“If anyone dares threaten their authority, they’ll be silenced, whoever they are.” The hand that was intertwined with yours tightened its grip on your fingers. “In the end, there was nothing to justify my father’s death. In the end, my father was killed by human greed.” His knuckles went ghost-white. “And by the foolishness of his own son.” Still staring into the dancing flames before him, you noticed he had the eyes of a man whose future resembled a dead-end street. The eyes of someone who was tired of seeing seasons die one after another, knowing that his father would never come home. The eyes of someone who was tired of seeing tomorrow die even before it came. The eyes of someone who spent a whole life dreaming upon days that would never return, dreaming of a person he would never see again. And you wondered if it was his father whom he saw in the flames, or was it a younger version of himself? Or maybe, he saw memories of happier days. Memories of a past he would never be able to go back to, along with scenes of a future he would never be able to move on to. Because his legs remained forever trapped in the heavy muds of regret.

“Before I knew it, my father’s theory became true inside my heart. Now, my mission in life. It’s to prove my father’s theory once and for all.”

You wanted to string together the right words, one by one, until they formed a bridge that would lead you closer to him, so he wouldn’t feel so alone. Because, even though your bodies were pressed so closed together, you could tell his soul was lost somewhere far away, somewhere dark, somewhere lonely. And you knew his father would have hated it for him to feel that way.

You stayed still, silent, and slightly mad at yourself for not being able to say something to him. The night is always dark if no one holds the light, so you wanted to hold it for him. You really wanted to. But you were astounded and overwhelmed by all the information, both about his past and about the reality you all lived in. His father’s theory, if true, would change the world as you knew it. As everyone knew it. A possibility that, if true, would change everything.

In the end you made peace with the fact that you weren’t wise enough to know what to say, and opted for gently wrapping your arms around him instead, pulling him closer, burying your face in the crook of his neck, hugging him as tightly as you could. If you couldn’t tell him, you would show him. If words were beyond your ability, you would make sure actions weren’t. He immediately responded by tightening his arms around you and pressing his nose against the top of your head, where you could feel him breathing heavily. He took such a deep breath that, for a moment, you thought he was going to cry. But no, you knew he wouldn’t, that would be nearly impossible. Because at this point, given the rate of pain he had been enduring for years, at that rate your eyes would run out of tears before your heart could let go of the pain.

As your head rested against his chest, in such proximity to his heart, and as its beating told you more about the pain he had been living with for all those years since his father’s passing, a question popped up in your mind.

“The basement. In Eren’s house. It has something to do with this. Doesn’t it?” You spoke after a few minutes of silence.

“Intel suggests that the basement of Eren Yeager’s home in Shiganshina holds a vital secret regarding our enemy. That’s our destination. By getting there, I can prove my father’s theory. I know it.” He held your hand tighter. “I just know it.”

His words carried the exact same conviction they did during meetings when planning strategies or during expeditions when giving commands in the field. Only that this time they were infused with something else, a certain vulnerability. A vulnerability that, along with the violent beating of his heart against your ear, explained to you why he was so committed to the cause. Why he had decided to give his entire life to the Survey Corps. It all made sense now. You understood that it had less to do with freeing humanity from the walls, and more to do with his late father.

As his heartbeat lulled you to sleep that night, your mind became flooded with thoughts of the basement and the secrets that could be hidden there. If there was something hidden at all, in the first place.

-

next chapter

taglist: @elnyrae @angelaevangelion @depitaangeline @ynackerman9499 @afatalheat @pumpkin-toffee @velouria17 @gassytritis @goddessinsweats @nube55 @jeanboyjean

[wosowrites]

All Tatted Up (Jessie Fleming x Reader)

Warnings: ⚠️trauma mentions⚠️

A/N: also for the sake of this story, Ann-Kat has retired. Also I love Z but she’s still the second keeper to make the story work. This is my fav fic i’ve ever written btw. and it’s based off this request:

Prompt: reader is a hard faced, tatted up goalkeeper who has a soft spot for Jessie.

You had always loved tattoos. Mapi León had gotten you into them when you were 18. You met her during your first cap for Spain, at 16, and when you were of age, and wanting tattoos, she was the woman to go to. Ever since then, you were constantly getting tattooed, it was therapy, it was healing, it was art.

You played for Barcelona for 6 years, playing for your home town was a dream. You were Barca’s starting keeper, and had 20 clean sheets in one season. You were a spanish legend. That’s why it came to everyone as a shock when you announced you were moving to London to be Chelsea’s first keeper. In reality, only a few people knew why you were leaving. Those people were your best friends, your spanish teammates, Mapi and Alexia.

The past 6 years playing for barcelona were everything, but living in barcelona, living in the town that homed your trauma, it was too hard. The girls understood, they even called Ona to tell them to keep an eye on you, even though they would never admit to you they had. You were always insistent that you could take care of yourself. And hell, you could. You were a brick wall, 6 foot tall, tatted up, jacked goalkeeper. But you were all bark no bite. Inside, behind the hours at the weight room, the tattoos, and the fierce on field personality, you were a god damn angel. You loved the beach and butterflies, and you always woke up at 5:00 am because you loved waking up with the sun.

It left fans confused, the hard, frowning, yelling on field personality was the opposite of the girl that would post sunrise pictures every morning.

But that was you. Your hard surface was practically unbreakable. It had taken your spanish teammates years to get to the root of you, that’s why it caught you so off guard when a certain freckled midfielder broke those walls in a month, it left you off guard how within a month of knowing her, you felt as though you wanted to protect her from the world.

I guess that’s just what Jessie Fleming did to you.

———

Today marked two months since you had joined Chelsea, and today was a big game. Manchester United v Chelsea. You were ready though. You did your game day ritual which consisted of not talking to anybody… yeah. That was it. Your teammates all respected that, and they respected you. They were the best people in the world, it was as though they knew that you had things beyond the surface, and they never judged you.

You walked into the tunnel, knowing you would be walking out after Magda, the captain. Ona was standing there behind her own keeper, Mary Earps.

"Y/n/n!" Ona squealed when she saw you. "¡Oye! hace tanto que te extraño! (Hey, Ona! it’s been so long, i’ve missed you )." You said in spanish, hugging the shorter girls. "Yo también chica, buena suerte hoy! mis compañeros de equipo te tienen un poco de miedo. ( me too girl, good luck today! my teammates are kinda scared of you." Ona joked.

You laughed, hugging her one more time before taking your spot in the line. It was only you from the Chelsea squad that was in the tunnel, but you liked being the first one out of the changing room. Oh, another thing about you, was that you were yet to have more than one goal scored against you in a game for Chelsea.

"That’s Ona Batlle, right?" a voice said behind you. You turned around to see Jessie standing there, basically looking up at you. You blushed bring red, not knowing why. "Um- yeah. We play for spain together." You said, feeling Ona’s eyes burning into your head. "I know. I’ve watched you before on TV playing for Spain." Jessie said. "Really? Me too. The gold medal game. And… others." You were talking shakily, she had that effect on you. The rest of the team started walking into the tunnel so Jessie smiled at you and quickly took her spot in the line. "Eres roja brillante ( you are bright red )," Ona giggled. "Callate! (shut up)" You said a bit loudly.

Most of the United players flinched.

It was the 70th minute in the game and the score was 1-0 to Chelsea. It was then that somehow, Alessia Russo got a breakaway. Kadeisha Buchanan was fast, and reached the blonde striker when she was in the box. You were ready to save the shot, but Kadeisha clipped the ball away, hitting her ankles first. Russo went tumbling to the ground, staying down a bit as Kadeisha tries to defend herself. But the ref wouldn’t hear it and awarded a penalty. She apologized to you but you brushed her off. "It’s no biggy, it happens. Just get ready for the rebound." You told her, placing yourself on the line. The referee came over to you, explaining to you the rules. "Respectfully i’ve been a keeper for 17 years, I know how to do this ref." You told her. Both teams giggled a bit, orher than Alessia, her face was stone cold, knowing she needed to score. The referee shrugged and walked away.

You extended your arms, jumping from side to side and playing mind games with Alessia. The referee blew her whistle, Alessia ran up quickly and hit the ball hard. You faked left right before she shot, making her shoot right. But you shifted your weight and got the tip of your fingers on the ball right as it was about to go into the net. The ball got pushed out and Magda was quick to clear it out. "FUCK YEAH!" You yelled loudly, pumping your fist in the air and getting hugs and claps on the back from all of your teammates. Jessie smiled at you, hugging your side before taking her spot again for a corner.

Millie took it, and it was perfect. It went right to Ella Toone, who jumped up in the air and headed it. As she did, you saw someone in blue jump as well, beside Ella. You saw her fall to the ground with a small scream, holding her head. You also saw the ball coming directly to the top left corner. You had to choose the ball. You jumped up, diving and caught the ball, falling to the ground and holding it to your chest. But the ball in your hands was long forgotten as you saw Jessie lying in the box, holding her head. You rushed over to her, the ball under your arm. You saw Ella leaning over her, but you pushed her away. "Hey get away from her." You basically growled. Ella did, she walked backwards towards her team. "Fucking scary she is." She mumbled.

Indeed, when you got protective, it was better for everyone to stay away. Ona knew that well, having been on the ground with you wanting to protect her more than once, so she made sure her manchester teammates stayed away. But she sensed that you were protecting Jessie in a different way. In a less sisterly way.

"Hey there, Jess." You said, gently pulling down her shirt and rubbing your gloved hand up and down her back. "Hey. Did she score?" Jess groaned, rolling over on her back. "Come on now. I’m in net. Of course she didn’t." You joked. "Of course." She laughed.

You pulled her hand off her head gently. Her head was bleeding a fair bit. "Where the hell are the medics?" You asked, looking around. "They went in the tunnel with Erin." Jessie groaned. It was true, they had gone in because Erin had taken a bad hit. "Okay then, sit up, we don’t want blood all over your hair." You said, seeing that Magda was trying to tell Emma to get the medics. You didn’t know what to do, she was bleeding a lot of she really needed pressure. "Okay, Jess. I’m gonna give you my shirt. This is so damn stupid." You mumbled. You slipped off your shirt quickly, pressing it to Jessie’s head who laughed. "I didn’t know what to do! Oh there are the medics." You said, standing up in your under shirt. As the keeper, you always wore a shirt under your jersey to avoid burns. "What the hell took you guys so long?" You asked, your voice carrying through the small stadium. The medics apologized quickly, earning nothing but an eye roll from you. "Hey, Sam? Can you get me another jersey?" You asked the striker who nodded and jogged over to Emma. You kneeled back down beside Jessie who now had a towel to her head. "Now that i’m thinking about it, maybe my dirty jersey wasn’t the best thing to put to your cut." You told her. Jessie laughed. "It’s okay. It smelt like you." She said, blushing immediately. "Hmm. Like me or like sweat?" You joked. "Like you." She answered.

The medic was now taping her head. "You’re going to take her off on concussion watch right?" You asked. "Yeah. Of course." The man answered quickly, not making any kind of eye contact with you. "No. Really i’m fine." Jessie tried to say. "If you play then I can’t play because i’ll be too worried about you. Go off the field, the games almost over. I’ll see you after, okay?" You told her. "Okay."

The medics tried to help her up but you ushered them off, helping her yourself. Kingsmeadow clapped loudly and you kissed her forehead quickly. Jessie walked off the field with the medics and your now blood stained jersey. Sam was now back with a fresh one which she handed to you. If it was anyone else, Sam would have teased you for how protective you were being of the freckled canadian, but she thought that for her own safety, maybe that wasn’t a good idea.

There were 9 minutes of added time, in which manchester fought hard, tiring you immensely. But the Blues managed to pull off the win. You were quick to high five your own players and the manchester players. Ella went nowhere near you, obviously avoiding you. But you didn’t care. You clapped at the fans quickly and then hurried into the tunnel and towards the medical room. You knocked on the door, opening it slightly. "You decent?" You asked. "Come on, y/n, i don’t need to be naked for a head injury. "Well you should change your jersey, Jess. It’s all blood stained." You said, walking up to her and pointing out the blood on her Jersey. "Oh shit. Yeah I forgot." She said. "I’ll get you one. But how’s your head?" You asked. "It’s okay. A small concussion and they’re gonna give me stitches once the bleeding stops." Jessie smiled. "Okay good. So I don’t need to kill Ella Toone?" You said, opening the door to go get her jersey. "No. She may live." Jess answered.

You quickly walked to the changing room, the team was still out on the field. You went to Jessie’s cubby to notice she only had her puffy coat and no jacket. It was too warm inside for a puffy jacket, so you rolled your eyes and grabbed your own jacket. The one with the number 1 on it. You walked back towards the room and opened the door. "So for some reason you didn’t bring your jacket, you only had your puffy coat, you weirdo." You told her, tossing her your zip up track jacket. "I know, I was in a rush this morning and I forgot it." She said, holding it. "This is yours though." She said, passing her finger over the number 1. "I know. My jersey isn’t bloody though." You said. "True." You guys held eye contact for a while before you broke it by turning around for her to change. "Thanks." She said.

You heard ruffling behind you and then it stopped. "You can turn around now." Jessie said. You turned around to see she hasn’t put on the track jacket. Your breath hitched. "Jess, what are you-?" You started saying. "Come here." She said, you started hearing people pouring into the tunnel. "Put the jacket on, Jess.” You said. "I don’t mind you seeing me like this." She said. "I don’t either. I don’t want the others to walk in and see you like this." You answered, walking towards her. "They’ve already seen me-"

"It’s different." You answered. Jessie slipped on the track jacket and you zipped it up for her slowly. Looking down at her body disappearing as the jacket zipped. Just then, the door opened. "Hey, you all good, Jess?" Niahm asked, poking her head through the door. "Yeah. All good. Give us a minute?" Jessie said.

Niahm looked between you both but nodded and walked out. You turned to Jessie, looking at her, your bodies close even though she was sitting down. You wanted her. You wanted her lips on yours so badly it almost hurt. So you gave in. You leaned down, pushing her chin up to give you full access to her lips. And you kissed her sweetly, and gently.

Eventually, you pulled away and walked towards the door. "I’ll see you later, J." You said.

Jessie nodded, a wide smile on her face.

A/N: I know ppl are gonna ask for a part 2 so I got you guys ;)

[wandamyconfort]

if I were you.. | CH.2

wanda Maximoff x fem!reader

summary: y/n is best friends with vision, who ironically, is the boyfriend of his worst enemy, wanda maximoff. until one night, when the clock struck midnight, they are both struck by something mysterious that completely changes the fate of their best friends, including a certain redhead… be careful what you wish for.

CH.1

sorry for any translation errors, english is not my first language

You woke up at 6:00 a.m. sharp as usual. I did this every day even on weekends so as not to lose the habit. Soon went to the bathroom to do his facial skin cleanse followed by 30 minutes of elliptical bike. a relaxing shower to soon after get dressed. a black blouse, jeans and white sneakers. you went downstairs quickly and ate breakfast.

Punctually at 8:00 a.m. you was at school, ready for another day that was already promptly scheduled; First class in history, Biology, Physics II and Mathematics. Then about 10 minutes to clear yourself of the likely scratch cards that were yet to come from Wanda, Valkyrie, Sam or Bucky. Then would perform his solo at the club leaving everyone else dumbfounded and dying of envy of his talent. Not to forget, of course, Mrs. Miller who would try to ruin his life. And later after school would go home to Vision to help him with his subjects which he was still struggling.

Vision left his girlfriend's house before the sun came up. Wanda's parents liked her boyfriend, but didn't find it at all pleasant for the boy to enjoy the moment. Since they had to spend the night out for work reasons.

Natalya and Erik worked together because they were two successful entrepreneurs. They had to always be traveling to conferences, meetings, outreaches, and partnerships with other companies. The trips were sometimes to cities closer but also distant, requiring them to stay up to four days away. That was one thing Wanda and vision had in common: the absence of her parents.

But Mrs. Agnes was the one who rescued the girl's parents. A very nice lady who bordered on 70 years old, gray hair and expressive blue eyes.

Wanda had her as a grandmother, or rather a second mother.

The lady who lived alone, despite having a granddaughter who lived in New York with her father, had been caring for Wanda since the frauds. She had a huge affection for the girl that only tended to increase.

Her house was close by, next to her own. To be sure. In her room, the girl was near the window that facilitated communication between them without having to go to the other's house.

- Banana and... Bacon? - asked moving closer to his bedroom window.

The woman nodded with her infectious smile as she stirred the pot.

- Are you coming for coffee or need a formal invitation? - Agnes asked, raising her gaze.

Wanda didn't think twice about running to her grandmother's house. she would never turn down bananas and a good bacon.

(...)

- Your clothes... I don't know what classification to put them in. - She said, as she analyzed you from head to toe.You just rolled your eyes.

- Y/N, l mean it... I've offered you a redesign but I don't know why it costs to refuse... Look at me. - Took a turn for you to analyze the look. - I'm from Celine today. - she said with a proud smile referring to the brand of your clothing as you looked at it as if it had three heads.

- Get out of the way, freak. - Insulted Bucky followed by a scratch card by one of his friends.

-Thug! - she let go as he took a deep breath covered by the newly scratched card.

- I think your Celine outfit is a lot better now. - You can't help it, trying your best to hold back the laughter.

Natasha ignored it.

"My eyes are burning," she paused for a moment and went back to talking still static. - My clothes will stain and my hair that took me hours to tidy up... And now see how it is! - She let out a scream tapping her foot angrily.

-Comes... Let's go to the bathroom. I help you.

(...)

It was exactly 7:30 p.m. when you arrived at the vision house. The boy opened the door and made a funny grimace.

- Punctual, huh? - Smiled letting you walk past him.

- As always. - she added and smiled when saw his mother in sight there.

- Good evening, Mrs. Stark.

- Hey, good night, Y/n! - Smiled friendly at the girl. - I already told you it's just pepper. Without that Mrs.

you blushed in agreement.

"Son, I'm going to have to be on call again today. It was an unforeseen event, Patricia asked me to replace her and I could not deny it... But I've already prepared dinner. - Argued for vision while fiddling with something inside the bag.

The boy sighed shaking his head in agreement.

- Feel at home, honey. - she said goodbye to the two of them by placing a kiss on each other's foreheads. Already near the door she looks at the vision and smiles.

- Mom Loves You.

Vision just gave a half smile listening to the door of the house closing.

- You should tell her. - You filled the silence that had become.

- Say what?

- Vision... Don't make a fool of yourself. To say that you miss her, her company. Saying you wanted her to spend more time with you. Who loves her!

- I don't know what you're talking about. - He tried to disguise himself while looking at the ground.

-Let's go... Stop. I know you very well. - Got close to him stroking the boy's arm.

"I'm your soul sister, remember?" I know you like the back of my hand.

"So let's go, my soul sister, take my math questions because I'm completely lost. Since the teacher arrives saying "Good morning, class!" I get lost. - he tried to change the subject by making her friend laugh.

He led you into the living room where there were several books on the table.

"And there we go," - you whispered.

(...)

The night quickly followed. You tried to help him with all the doubts without realizing that the hours were passing. He looked at the time on his cell phone and almost had a heart attack when he realized it was 11:27 p.m.

- My parents must already be worried, I have to go.

- Yes, of course. I accompany you. - He said already getting up and screwing up his whole body making a grimace appear on his face when he heard several streaks that to you, were agonizing.

- No need. I'm walking and it's not even that far, just a few blocks...

- I'm not crazy about letting you go alone, especially at this time. Not even thinking. - Grabbed his coat that was on the couch and put it on.

"Okay," rolled his eyes. - I'd really be scared to death of going it alone.

-I know. I know you like the back of my hand. - Smiled repeating the same phrase she had used hours ago.

(...)

It was cold and You ran his hands over his arms to try and warm himself in vain. When he realized it, he instantly took off his coat and gave it to you, who smiled thankfully. You both traced the path by talking about trivial things without being able to avoid spontaneous laughter until you stood on your feet staring at something. The boy frowned looking at you and followed gaze. There was a fountain with a large gray statue in the center, very beautiful. you who adorned that huge almost empty square. had never noticed that source there, so you assumed it had been placed recently. Without holding back, they came closer, exploring her.

They just watched her for a while until her voice broke the silence.

- Vision... Why are you with wanda? I swear I don't understand. - It's been a while since you've wanted to ask that.

-Why not? I like it, simple. - Said friendly.

- I honestly don't understand how anyone can like wanda maximoff. She's so... urg. - He shook his head in disgust.

- You say that because you don't really know her. -Retorted. You snorted looking at him.

- I also don't understand how I can be friends with Sam and Bucky's idiots. They're disgusting!

- I'm not friends with them! We're just teammates on the same football team and that's it. You don't see me talking to them, do you? - He shrugged. - And it wouldn't go down well either, since they threw scratch cards in my face when I was a rookie.

- You said it. - Retorted sarcastically

- I don't know what you're complaining about so much, Y/n. Your life is perfect! - you laughed incredulously hearing that.

- No kidding, right, Stark.

- i'm serious. You are decisive, you don't care what others think of you. You know where you came from, where you're going, you have two parents who love you and who will always be by your side. you has an amazing voice for just a seventeen-year-old girl. you has a bright future as a singer, always knew what you wanted and fights to achieve it tooth and nail... And me. He looked at himself letting out a nosey laugh. - I'm a guy who has no idea what he's going to do after high school, I don't know where I'm going... What good is this 'popularity' now, if in a few years it will be worth nothing?

- What are you talking about? - She asked incredulously. - My life sucks! Everyone sees me as a loser and deep down I really feel that way. I'm not as determined as you think, I try to show myself like this to camouflage my insecurities and not feel like garbage like everyone makes me feel. You are the Quarterback of the team, handsome, popular, all the girls die of love for you. Date the most beautiful and popular girl there, everyone loves you there and... - You rambled and Vision rolled his eyes.

- that's enough!. - He snorted, interrupting his speech. - Don't fuck, Y/n...

- Your life that's perfect here! - You finished by tapping your foot.

- It's yours. -Insisted.

They began a discussion about the perfect life monologue between them. you turned your back on him crossing your arms with a frown ending the argument, Vision did the same. Their breaths were flawed from the debate. They stayed like that for a few seconds, not knowing each other's next move, they both turned forward screaming together:

- I wish I had your life! - They shouted in coincidence, actually ending the discussion.

The pole light flashed instantly and shattered startling you who took a step back. All the lights in the square began to flicker as they broke soon after, leaving the two of them staring at each other in the total darkness of the night.

(...)

you woke up early, at the usual time, slowly opening your eyes, still sleepy you headed for the bathroom when you stopped on your way looking at the bedroom.

What the hell am I doing in the vision's house? -you thought out loud looking around recognizing he friend's room.

- I remember going home and... - Murmured thoughtfully to herself. - Oh, shit! My parents are going to kill me... Sleeping here unannounced, they'll have the marine guard after me by now! - You raised your voice.

- You frowned. - Damn, I've gone hoarse. - This time you whispered, and choked, noticing that your voice was thick.

You didn't think twice and left the room, stunned and sleepy. You went down the stairs looking for the exit, you had to leave urgently and you would get out of there without waking anyone.

It was then that her reflection caught her attention in the mirror that adorned the wall in the large room. you frowned more and took a few steps back. The first thing she did was to widen her eyes, petrified, and cautiously observe if what her eyes stubbornly showed her was just a dream.

Slowly you moved hands up to his face, feeling it, now was sure that this was not a dream? It was a nightmare! You opened your mouth in horror and began to scream sterilely. Your eyes were still on the mirror that showed you the reflection of your friend Vision.

You screamed, screaming louder and louder.

- Son, what happened? Are you okay? - Questioned Pepper, newly awakened by the screaming, walking down the stairs in her pajamas, almost tripping over her own feet, totally frightened.you still had your eyes wide open. you didn't answer, just stared at your reflection in the mirror.- Son? Why are you screaming?

- she approached me, evidently concerned, touching the shoulder that was supposed to be your son. There were no answers to your questions.

- This can't be happening? - you hissed almost inaudibly. Hearing that thick voice, which was not her own, made her even more terrified. - If I'm here then vision is... - you whispered thoughtfully, and without finishing reasoning, walked quickly to the door with quick steps. you just didn't expect to fall. you wasn't used to those long legs.

you stood up again, grabbing the first pair of pants saw on the way. pepper stared at the scene in confusion.

- Where do you think you're going at this hour? - The woman asked as she saw him open the door.

- Don't worry, Mrs. Pepper, everything is fine! - you replied at last unconvincingly, his voice shaking terribly. you tried to calm himself by walking out the door, leaving the stunned and even more confused woman in the middle of the room.

- Mrs. Pepper? - she murmured confused.

(...)

every evening after dinner, scott and hope would sit in the living room in front of the fireplace and talk about banal things, accompanied by a good wine, which always made them go to bed later, which resulted in: they always woke up later the next morning.

you always reproached them for this. always saying that we should all get at least eight hours of sleep. But today you were grateful for that. You entered the house very easily with the extra keys that your parents left hidden in one of the flower pots in the garden.

she closed the door, trying not to make a sound. Her parents were completely unconscious on the living room floor. She walked cautiously up the stairs on her new long legs. If they woke up, she would be dead because she had been caught in the act. After all, what was the boy doing there at that time? She arrived in front of her door and began to knock, trying to make as little noise as possible.

- vision, open this door. - She whispered and knocked again.

You cursed yourself for always sleeping with the bedroom door locked, since you liked privacy, but at this moment you really wanted to break the damn door down and you were sure you could.

- Vision… Damn it, vision, wake up! - You increased the frequency of your knocking, realizing that you wouldn't wake the other one up.

The boy frowned, his eyes still closed.

- Y/n? - he asked lazily, still getting out of bed.

- Open the damn door! - Despair was already taking over his body when he heard a pair of footsteps downstairs.

- What are you doing here? - He didn't finish his sentence after opening his eyes and observing the place.

- Hey… What am I doing in your room?

- Vision, will you please open this fucking door?! - I was getting more and more nervous, impatient, scared, and afraid of what was going to happen behind that door.

- Hey, calm down, I'll be right there… - He speech died after opening the wooden door, now the two were face to face looking at each other in terror.

- You… but I… what?

Vision couldn't formulate a sentence so he limited himself to screaming. you entered, locking the door behind you and covering the boy's mouth to stop the screaming.

- Damn it, don't scream. You'll get my parents' attention! - you whispered.

- Will you be quiet? - vision shook his head frantically.

- W-what happened? - He managed to speak in a stutter, his eyes opening wider and wider as if it were still possible.

- I don't know. I have no idea, when I woke up I was like this. - She spoke quickly, apprehensive, looking at her body.

- If you are me and I am you, then… - He looked stunned at his new body and his eyes widened. - damn y/n… I HAVE BREASTS! - The boy shouted hysterically, running his hands over his body.

You, who hadn't stopped to notice this derealization, turned red, and became hysterical again.

- Oh, holy shit, I have too much volume between my legs.

Unlike Vision, you didn't dare to put your hand on the new body, you just looked down and even though you were wearing sweatpants you could feel it.

- Y/n, honey, is everything okay? - Scott's voice made itself present, knocking on the door, and you widened your eyes.

- Answer! - you whispered to vision remembering that you couldn't do it with that man's voice.

- Yes... Everything's fine baby! - The boy murmured in a shaky voice, trying to sound natural with that feminine voice. He scratched the back of his neck nervously at the girl's gaze on him.

- Everything's fine baby? - mumbled Scott, confused by his daughter's slang, but shrugged. - Come down, coffee is ready. - He said as he walked down the stairs to the kitchen.

slapped Vision on the head, who was now smaller than you.- Everything's fine, baby? Everything's fine, baby?

- I didn't mean it. I was nervous!- It's okay... - He sighed, running his hand through his hair and soon missed his long hair.

- Y/n, what are we going to do? I can't go home like this... - He spoke angrily on the edge of the bed.

- Calm down ... First let's think about what could have caused this. - Reasoned a little trying to keep calm walking from side to side with his hands in his hair.- Maybe it was something we ate...

- Don't be an idiot. No food, no matter how bad it was, couldn't have done such damage.

- Sorry, I'm nervous... - He stood up, tapping his foot on the floor at every moment without taking his eyes off the body he now occupied.

- Or maybe... - You looked at him who now occupied your body.

- Last night... When we came from your house... - You said thoughtfully pausing the words and Vision seemed to understand.

- In the square... - He followed your reasoning.

- The fountain...

- We wished...

- To have each other's lives! - They concluded together.

- No, no, not this! This can't be happening… I didn't mean it, and how is that possible? I was happy with my life, I want my body back! - The young man spoke in agony pacing back and forth in the middle of the room.

- I didn't mean it either, I was just trying to be nice. And this is all your fault, if you hadn't started with the 'Your life is perfect, y/n, blah blah blah' talk, none of this would have happened.

- My fault? It's your fault that you came up with all that monologue about the perfect life and 'Your life is perfect here, Vision'. - he imitated in annoying little Y/N voice, a perfect imitation, by the way, since the voice was her own.

You looked at him with a frown and went on. A small fight started between the two of you, who were now rolling on the floor of the room.

- Give me my body back! Give it back! - Vision shouted, his small body on top of the other as he squeezed what had been his face the night before as if he wanted to get her off him.

- No! You give me back my body! - you shouted, now taking control of the fight and standing over the other, pulling the brown hair that used to be his.

- Ouch, ouch, enough! - he pushed her. - This way we won't get anywhere! - Vision put an end to the fight.

- You're right... Instead of fighting let's try to find solutions to solve this. - she stood up and helped the other soon after. - And I think I already know where we start...

The two went out the back door without being seen by Scott who was watching TV. Hope was still asleep, now lying on the sofa. You, who now occupied the boy's body, were dressed in a blue tank top that made the blonde's statuesque body clearly visible. A pair of black sweatpants and sandals. Vision who occupied your body was wearing his pink pajamas and put only a jacket on top, they drove to the square where everything started.

When they arrived at the place they were surprised, for there was no fountain anywhere. But there was a huge hole where it used to be, with pipes in sight and some bricklayers assessing the place.

- What happened here? - Vision asked, approaching one of the bricklayers involved in the work.

The same one stopped his work looking at the two young people, immediately looked at Vision drying him, seeing that the unknown girl was wearing a baggy pink shorts leaving her legs showing. You, who was behind Vision, noticed this and made a face of disgust, clearing his throat.

- Ah, there was a problem with the plumbing, some pipes burst, that is, a disaster! We'll have to replace everything.

- And the fountain... where is it? - You in the friend's body asked, checking all around without any trace of it.

- It had to be removed while we fixed everything.

- But you don't know where they took it?

- Um... No. But if you go to the city hall, I think someone can tell you. - The youngsters didn't waste any time. The town hall was right in front of the square.

- Can you give us some information? - The person who occupied the Y/N body turned to the old receptionist, with a face that said 'I hate my job'.

- It's about the fountain that used to be in the square. We want to know where it is. - You who occupied the boy's body asked, already impatient.

- I don't know. - answered automatically while you were messing with the computer.

- What do you mean you don't know? For God's sake, it's a fountain with a huge statue right in the center.

- Calm down. - interrupted the boy next to her. - You'll have to excuse her... I mean, he! - He corrected himself when he noticed the confused look on the woman's face, who was now looking at them with an arched eyebrow. - It's just that that fountain was of great sentimental value to us... So if you would be so kind, could you help us, please?

- she rolled his eyes at the girl's plea. - not in town, I don't know exactly where are. There's no information here. - she said while his dark eyes checked the computer screen. - But it says here that he will be back. Well, let me see…

Your eyes scanned the screen and you started tapping your foot on the floor impatient with the delay.

- Ah... Here it is. In a month it will be back.

- ONE MONTH? - You shouted and some people who worked there looked at him. Vision, occupying her friend's body, elbowed her in the rib.

- Okay. Thanks! - Vision resigned himself. he knew she had nothing else to do but wait. He pulled his friend's strong arm and left the place to spare themselves from further humiliation from the stares and whispers of several people who were in the place stared at them for not being dressed appropriately. Especially you, who was now him and tentatively wearing pink pajamas.

- What are we going to do now? - You groaned, putting your hands through your hair. You were visibly worried as you stared at the road in the passenger seat and at the driver's seat occupied by the body that now didn't belong to you.

- I don't know. - You looked at her and saw your own worried brown eyes. - I guess we'll have to wait... I still don't understand how that fountain could have caused us this. I mean, what kind of fountain was it? Fountain of desires? - he exclaimed sarcastically, making quotation marks with your fingers without looking away from the road.

- I don't understand it either. But now that you told me that, I remembered something… - you was trying to remember. - Just below the central statue of the fountain there was a small metal plate with some words… Do you remember?

- I think so… - he wrinkled his forehead, thoughtful. - Yes, there was but it wasn't in English so it didn't hold my attention much. It seemed to be in Italian, or Russian or German… I don't know. - He was also trying to remember.

A brief silence flooded the car and Vision decided to go home, and as the clock was eight o'clock he assumed that his mother would already be in the hospital.

- Wait... Fare Attenzione a ciò che si desidera! - you tried to pronounce the words that were now invading his mind.

- What? Speak our language, Y/n! - That was the phrase. - And what does it mean? - he asked confused.

- I have no idea? but we can find out. - You answered, getting out of the car and following the boy who had already opened the front door. They confirmed that the boy's mother had already left for work with the typical notes that they used to leave her, this time on the coffee table in the living room.

"Son, I won't be on call today, Patricia is already better and will be taking over my shift as a thank you, I was worried about how you were this morning. You looked dazed. I'll be early, don't be late for school.... Mommy loves you."

Vision was reading that note as You already took hold of the small laptop, which was sitting on top of the couch. To search for those unknown words that now could not get out of your head.

- Be careful what you wish for... - You whispered, seeing the meaning of that phrase, still keeping your eyes fixed on the computer screen in your lap.

- So... That's it. I guess we'll just have to live each other's lives. - murmured the boy, coming closer.

- Are you crazy? - you asked incredulously. - We have no other way, you heard that lady. The damned fountain won't be back for another month, what are we supposed to do between now and then?

- Let's tell someone what happened. - Maybe someone can help us. - You said.

- Do you think that's a good idea?

- It costs nothing to try. - you frowned and remembered something, looked at the clock on one of the walls. - Damn, Vision, it's going to be almost nine o'clock, we're already late! - you whined, crying. Yes, you were crying, but not because you were going to be late, that was just a pretext. You were crying because you were terrified of everything that was happening.

- Stay calm. It's okay if we're a little late, everything will be fine. I'm here, we're in this together.

He knew you better than anyone else and knew you were afraid so he wrapped you in a tender embrace which resulted in you both feeling strange, embracing yourself was indescribable

- Besides, I'm horrible at crying, so stop. - He said in a humorous tone, separating from the hug and looking at the face that until yesterday belonged to him.

You couldn't help but draw a small smile at the comment.

- Have I ever said I have a nice smile? - Vision asked smugly, causing you to slap him. The boy looked at you with a pained expression, it had hurt.

you chose not to take a shower, you really weren't ready for that yet. You couldn't imagine cleaning a body that wasn't yours, even though you knew it would happen at some point. You still needed to assimilate all this, so you just changed clothes trying to keep your eyes closed with the help of Vision who showed you what to wear: a pair of beige jeans, a white tank top, and a green plaid shirt over it, and sports shoes.

- Y/n, I don't even think I'll need to go to your place to change. - You had slept a few days ago at your friend's house because of a double work and decided to stay there. you should have forgotten that sweater and a pair of jeans that had already been washed.

- Great. Then get dressed and let's go.

- I think I should take a shower first. - he said expectantly with a humorous sideways smile.

- Don't you dare! - You gave him a murderous look.

- Okay. The one who spoke is no longer here. - He laughed lightheartedly and started to change his clothes.

(...)

In less than ten minutes by car they arrived at the school. In the end neither of them had been late, because the first class was geography for both of them and it had been vacant. Then they walked, as if everyone in the hall knew it, towards the lockers to get the books for the next class.

- Are you ready? - sighed the boy with all his belongings in hand.

- I think so.... I mean, no! - She closed her eyes for a moment and then opened them, she was nervous.

- And you?

The image of Valkyrie and Sam appeared in the hallway with the usual scratch card in their hands. The tall girl smiled with amusement as she saw Loki picking up his books from the floor, freshly knocked over by a basketball player. As the boy stood up with everything in hand, the girl knocked the scratch card right into his face, who now dropped all the books again to wipe his eyes.

- You immediately closed your eyes tightly as you saw Sam come close. But the cold scratch never came.

- Damn... I had forgotten how it burns. Poor Loki. - muttered the boy, his eyes closed with anger.

At the same moment you opened yours and found your friend's face all soaked and squeezing his eyes, at that moment you mentally thanked for not being in your body.

- You'll have to get used to this. - You helped him clean himself up.

- This is supposed to be the moment when you are supposed to help me look on the bright side of things. - He opened a small smile still scratching his eyes. Vision quickly remembered something and opened his still red eyes and looked startled at you.

- What now?

- Damn, what are we going to do with Wanda? - You widened your eyes.

- Oh... Oh, shit! - You cursed.

- Vision, why didn't you call me yesterday?You said you would call me but I didn't get any call from you. Why didn't you call me? - questioned the redhead who had approached the two of them.

- I'm sorry... - She interrupted herself realizing the situation she was in. The girl who had her hands on her waist dropped them when she heard the other's voice. She turned her eyes away from Vision and looked at the girl, seeing how soaked she was, she tried to hold back her laughter.

- Your house ran out of water and the only way was to take a shower with a scratch pad?

- You hunchbacked ass...

You couldn't continue with the insult as Vision glared at you with his big brown eyes followed by an elbow in the arm subtly so that Wanda wouldn't notice.

wanda was surprised that Y/n didn't retort to her insults. But she paid no attention to it and turned her gaze back to the boy. He looked as if he was having an epileptic fit because he was so restless in his seat. Tension took over. Vision didn't know how to act in front of his girlfriend and you just wanted to get out of there as fast as possible.

- Wanda I-I'm going to class now... - You tried to be as natural as possible in front of the other's attentive gaze on you. - Talk to you later, okay? - You improvised, slowly walking away taking Vision with you.

- Vision. - called him in a velvety voice making both of them stop their way. - Aren't you going to give me even a kiss?

[ash5monster01]

Truths of Our Past Part 7

Pairing: Older!Charlie Dalton x FemReader

Warnings: 18+, angst, mentions of nudity, mentions of infertility, mentions of suicide, depression, depressing thoughts, past trauma, facing trauma, romance, understanding, fluff.

Summary: You had met Charlie in University, were married shortly after, and had become accustomed to a beautiful life together. When you receive a wedding invitation to one of Charlie’s previous classmates weddings you discover that Charlie had a dark past, one he had been trying to forget. In the midst of it all you try to help him through it while finding out that he’s not the guy you thought you married at all. Maybe he’s even better.

word count: 3.3k

Part 6 ←→ Part 8

Masterlist

10/9/69

Day 7/8

You woke up the next morning to a damp wash cloth pressed against your skin. Eyes fluttering open to see your soft and handsome Charlie smiling at you as he wiped away the lipstick that had been left on your skin. It had been smeared from Charlie and your slumber but waking up to see him like this you’d do that every night if you could. No words had to be shared as your hand reached to run your fingers through his hair, the lipstick now almost gone, only the slightest red hue left on your skin. He was entirely too perfect and the memories of living your life here came to your mind again.

“What do you think about moving?” you suddenly asked, voice still lazy with sleep.

“Moving?” he questioned, still tracing the cloth over where there had been marks on your skin.

“Yeah, like out of the city” you said and Charlie thought about it for a moment, the idea not entirely impossible.

“I wouldn’t hate it. We’d probably make less money than we do if I found a job out of the city but you work as well so we’re still bringing in more money than most” he said and you could only smile, your heart aching over leaving the Times but also soaring over the idea of moving to the next stage of life. You’ve already accomplished more than you ever expected.

“That’s true, it would be nice” you hummed in delight, hand still softly combing through his hair. Charlie smiled at your blissed out look and pressed a kiss between your breasts.

“Where you thinking of moving sweetheart?” he asked you, chin resting on your stomach.

“Here” you said like it was the simplest thing in the world but Charlie tensed above you. You could feel his heart rate accelerating against your hip and slowly you lifted your head to furrow your eyebrows at him.

“Is everything okay?” you asked softly and he wore a nervous look, almost unable to make eye contact with you as he processed his thoughts.

“Baby, you know how hard it is for me to come here” he began to say and you were sighing, head falling back into the pillows.

“But everyone is here Char. Knox and Chris, Todd and Ann. I love the area, the scenery. I want a big beautiful town house for our kids and the simple life. I want a life here” you told him, tears burning behind your eyes.

“It looks amazing baby, I know, but I grew up here. I know it seems like the American dream but reality is lives were crushed here, my life was crushed here” he argued and you refused to lift your head and look up at him. You didn’t want him to see the tears that were almost slipping out the sides of your eyes and down onto the pillows.

“We could fix that. We have the power to make it different for our kids and for you. Neil’s death can’t keep you from happiness forever Charlie” and your words stung, you knew they did, and maybe they weren’t entirely fair. Yet it wasn’t fair to continue using Neil as an excuse to hate the world because Neil deserved to be remembered as a beacon of hope. A lesson on living life to the fullest and not missing out on anything. Now here Charlie was, not taking an opportunity because of a sadness that he’s carried for ten years.

“I am happy baby, I swear” but you were rolling away from him, tears slipping onto the pillow and out of his sight.

“Then why can’t we be happy here?” you asked and he couldn’t even answer because he didn’t have one. At least not an answer you would accept because it would prove you were right.

“I’m sorry” he softly said but you couldn’t entirely take it right now. You didn’t want an apology if things wouldn’t change.

“I gotta get ready for the rehearsal” you told him before getting up and locking yourself in the bathroom to be alone. You needed to be alone.

It wasn’t long until everyone was downstairs and sharing a late breakfast before having to go to the rehearsal. Knox and Chris clocked instantly that you and Charlie weren’t talking but they knew not to say anything. Everyone just accepted the silence the whole way to the church and everyone did too when they realized it as well. Chris desperately wanted to get you alone and ask why but based on the devastated look on your face she knew it was better not to ask just yet. Ann on the other hand didn’t have a single clue.

“Oh Y/N, I promise this won’t take long” she whispered over to you, positively giddy over getting to practice her wedding.

“I know Ann, I’m fine” you promised her, a forced smile upon your face.

“Clearly” the sarcastic response from Chris had both you and Ann looking at her with shock. “What, you’ve had a long face all morning”

“It was a long morning, I don’t want to talk about it” you told her, arms crossing over your chest and Chris sighed.

“Look I’m sure your behavior is justified but we need to get through this first” Chris told you and you nodded, feeling a bit like a scolded child but understanding.

“Alright, let’s get everyone in place” and that was how you found yourself stood beside your husband, moments from walking down the aisle. Good memories and bad ones intermingling, and both of you to stubborn to look at each other.

Ann is discussing details with the wedding planner who is just as blonde and bright eyed as her. Knox and Chris stand in front of you, soft whispers and large smiles on their faces. It pains you to watch but you haven’t said a word to Charlie since this morning and you weren’t going to start now. You try to distract yourself with Maggie who won’t stop glancing at Meeks who had gotten stuck walking with Ann’s junior bridesmaid Laine, her sixteen year old cousin. Thankfully later in the night you had remembered to inform the girls that Pitts had mentioned a girl named Kathy and she was stuck with said red head. Now it looked like she was seriously considering it.

“Join arms everyone, and remember your counts!” the wedding planner was announcing and you spotted each couple pairing arms. You could feel Charlie’s stare and you stayed unmoving.

“Come on you two, don’t be shy” and then Chris was turning around and shooting a glare your way. Sighing you joined your arm with your husbands, his other hand coming to rest on it. A peace offering and the comfort it provided you made your heart clench. The worst thing about being upset with him is he was the only one who comforted you the best.

“I know you’re mad at me, but we have to do this for Todd” he whispered to you and you sighed, a sign of defeat as you heard the bridal march start to be played and the doors to the church open.

The wedding planner barked out orders as each pair walked through the church doors. The church was empty and cold but at least Charlie provided some warmth as you memorized which foot to lead with, how many paces you should be behind Knox and Chris, and exactly how fast you should be walking. You tried to remember your own wedding rehearsal but it was hard to recall considering you were so jittery with excitement that day. Much like Ann who was bound to be the most perfect bride. You envied her for it. To be so hopeful and beaming for a beautiful future with the man you love. Not knowing how complicated things could become between you and the other person.

It wasn’t just the moving thing. You and Charlie had been on different sides of the same path for a while now. The infertility had been killing you. Slowly chipping away at your entire being. You didn’t want to be that couple in a sad, quiet, empty, apartment, in a big city and no one to share it with. Charlie was enough but you wanted more. More of you and him in the world but he feared the world because of Neil and you feared how that could destroy the entire outcome of your relationship. Maybe some small part of you thought moving here could somehow magically help you get pregnant. Whatever reasoning it was you just wanted to be with the people you loved and be happy. Not go back to your upper east side apartment that felt so cold. You wanted little Johnny down the street and Ann to bring over warm cookies. You wanted a family even if you couldn’t have your own.

“Baby will you please talk to me” Charlie begged once the rehearsal was over. You had been waiting outside the church, arms freezing in the autumn wind. You felt Charlie drape your coat over your shoulders.

“There isn’t much to talk about” you told him, mind still buzzing with your realization. Your thoughts scared you and now you were stuck with them.

“There is everything to talk about, you can’t simply be mad over just the moving thing” he groaned out, hands tugging at his chestnut hair.

“And why not? Is it not justified to be sick and tired of a big city and a job I can’t even use my real name for!” you finally snapped, head turning to face him. What use was it to be a writer for the Times and have no one know it was you doing such amazing work?

“You’ve never complained about this before, who is to say the local paper here wouldn’t be the same?” Charlie said and you finally looked at him. The pain behind his eyes was the reason you had spent so long not looking at him.

“Maybe it will be the same but at least we’ll be here surrounded by people that love us” you told him, eyes filling with tears.

“Is that what this is about? To be closer to my friends and have some weird blended family thing going?” he asked, shoulders shaking as he tried his best not to yell. He had been so worked up over you ignoring him, he was trying not to lose it.

“Maybe it is, because I’d much rather have a weird blended family than stiff dinners with your parents and disapproving looks from mine! This chosen family we have here is all I ever needed” you told him, head tipping to the sky to keep the tears at bay.

“So I’m not enough?” he finally asked, voice seemingly calm for such a loaded sentence.

“Of course you are Charlie but that big apartment. Three rooms just for us to fill one. It’s a constant reminder that it’ll be nothing more” and the weight of the conversation hit Charlie like a brick. The tears blurring your vision and cheeks so red from the cold.

“Baby we’ll have kids and even if we don’t you’ll still be reminded of that here” he said, trying to step near you and comfort you. Yet you backed away before he could.

“Yeah but at least here we have friends and nieces and nephews. More people to fill that hole in my heart Charlie because it’s swallowing me whole right now. It’s sucking all the life out of me and I don’t know how to get it to stop” the tears were pouring down your face now and Charlie felt his heart shatter at the sight of you.

“Why didn’t you tell me this?” his voice was broken, his own tears stinging at the back of his eyes.

“How am I supposed to? How am I supposed to look you in the eye and tell you I’m miserable because we can’t have kids?” you asked him, the backs of your hands wiping at the tears streaming down your face.

“You can tell me anything baby, I’m always going to be there for you. No matter what it is because I can’t lose you too” and the weight of Neil slapped both of you again.

“I’m going to walk back, I’ll see you there” you told him and Charlie went to reach for you but you stepped out of the way. “Let me go”

And he did even though it went against his better judgement. He knew you needed to be alone right now and that was what hurt the most. To know that you’ve been hurting all these months and he was too blinded by his own pain to notice. He hadn’t cared about the no pregnancy thing as much because he was scared to put kids so innocent in the world that could be hurt like Neil. He felt relieved that he didn’t have that burden of keeping a child so hopeful that they don’t want to take their own life. While he was seeing it as burden you were seeing it as heart break and he hadn’t been there for you when he should have. Now here you were on opposite sides a war that should never be fought. All he needed was you and if he didn’t fix this soon he would lose you.

You were thankful Charlie had brought you your coat or else this walk would have been freezing. It was exactly what you needed though. The fall breeze numbed you in a way that made things a bit more bearable. The autumn leaves in the trees were still vibrant but more littered the ground than they did branches these days. As you got further into town you noticed it was a buzzing more than normal until you saw lots of red and white indicating celebration of football. Homecoming more than likely and as the marching band began to play and girls began to cheer you wanted to be further away from the commotion. “Do you need a ride?”

“What?” you found yourself saying as you spotted the man beside you. His red hair was gelled back perfectly, tie tight, shirt pressed, and long jacket hanging over his shoulders. Common for lawyers your age, it was almost intimidating how put together he currently looked.

“You look a little distraught, figured I’d offer a ride” he said motioning to his car. Eyes falling on the building behind you, you spotted the window that proved your previous assumption. A law firm.

“I um, I’m not entirely sure what’s going on with me at the moment” you offered with a sad laugh and he could only chuckle as he began to remove one of his leather gloves.

“Sadly I know exactly what that feels like, I’m Richard” and he was offering you a hand which you politely shook back.

“Y/N” you told him back and he smiled before nodding his head to his car.

“I’m still offering that ride if you need” he told you and you sighed, eyes glancing at the chaos of the town and the rumbling engine of his car facing the direction of peace.

“As long as Maple Ave isn’t to far out of your way” you said to him and he looked almost surprised you had agreed before moving to open the passenger door for you.

“Not at all” he informed you before shutting you in. You watched as he walked back around before getting in the drivers side and shifting the car into gear.

“So Cameron & Son’s Law Firm” you said gesturing to the window he was now rolling away from.

“Yeah, I started it with my Dad a few years back. The name ended up to be useless since he passed last year” he told you and you instantly felt guilty for bringing it up.

“I’m sorry for your loss” and he shook his head, eyes trained on the road.

“Don’t be, it was kind of freeing for me. I learned a lot about life this past year that I wish I would’ve known” he told you and you nodded as you looked down at your hands.

“What about you?” he asked and you gave him a confused look, surprised he was suggesting you were a working woman in this day and age. “I can spot a member of the work force when I see one. We all wear the same mind numbing look on our faces.

“Journalist, for the Times actually” and he wore a surprised expression, eyes glancing over to you.

“Really, have I read any of your work?” he asked curiously and you shrugged.

“If you’ve read any of Dean Manning’s work than yes” and the low chuckle that came from the boy beside you almost surprised you.

“Screwed you on the pen name huh. No works published under the marvelous name Y/N…” and then he trailed off realizing he didn’t know your last name.

“Dalton, Y/N Dalton” you told him and something else entirely washed over his face as he now glanced at you even more.

“As in Charlie Dalton?” he asked, voice a bit strained and almost nervous.

“Yes, that’s my husband” and if you weren’t crazy he had definitely started to speed up in the direction of your departure.

“Of course it is” he practically laughed to himself and you felt confusion wash over you until you recalled the name, the red hair.

“Richard Cameron” you practically said to yourself before realization dawned on you. “You’re him, wow. I never would have guessed”

“Look that was a long time ago, I’m sure you’ve heard things that I’m not proud of anymore” he said, hands squeezing the steering wheel until his knuckles were white.

“Calm down Cameron, please. My husband and me are on the outs right now so we’re kind of a team” and he calmed only slightly as he turned onto Maple Ave.

“He isn’t here is he?” he asked nervously and you shook your head.

“He’s probably still at the church for Todd’s wedding rehearsal stuff” you said and he sighed and looked over to you.

“So you’re staying at Knox’s place” he knew where it was, a former alum in the same line of work as him. He wasn’t entirely off his radar.

“Yes, actually” you said as he now drove with a purpose, knowing the destination in mind.

“Look I’m sorry, if I had known I would’ve never offered the ride. I keep my distance out of respect” he started to blabber but you held up a hand as he pulled to a stop in front of Knox’s house.

“Don’t worry about it Cameron, my husband has become a gentle man. I love him with everything in me and I know he would be thankful you got me home safe” and he nodded even though he still felt little comfort.

“If you could tell Todd congratulations for me. He deserves it” and you nodded, hand reaching to pop the door open.

“I’m glad I met you Cameron” you told him and he seemed shocked as you got out of the car.

“I haven’t been called Cameron so much since I graduated Welton” he told you and you could only smile.

“Brings back some good memories huh?” you told him, head leaned down into the window.

“Yeah, it does” and you accepted this before offering a wave and shutting the door. He waited like a gentleman until you were in the home before driving away. It looked rushed but you were sure it was fear of reaction to his presence. It was clear he had changed from the man your husband had known. Maybe all the boys had after those days. You wished there was some way to relieve their pain but maybe it was destiny. Maybe Neil’s death put them all on the path they were meant to be on. They all became the people they were meant to be whether it was what they wanted or not. The only good thing was at least they still had each other.

Well at least most of them did.

[eddiesguitarskills]

When We Were Young

Part 3

Ex Eddie Munson X reader

Other parts 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6.

Intro: 5 years have past since you packed up and left behind Hawkins. Well not all of it, as the people you met there are still a huge part of your life. But it's been 5 years since you had set a foot in the small town, 5 years since you left him. And now after all that time you were back.

Warning: angst, language, mentions of suicide, miscarriages, self harm, mental health. Use of y/n. Slow burn. Arguments. Mentions of break ups. Female identity reader.

Bold parts are flashbacks

Word count: 2.2k

A/n: please only read if you are in a good place, I wouldn't want this story to trigger or hurt anyone. I'm sorry this part it short but I didn't want to add loads in when it felt like a good place to end this part. Also there will be happy moments coming soon, it's just super slow burn. Let me know if you wanna be tagged in the next part, thank you for reading

Not prove read.

Despite the panic attack you had after Eddie left, you still went downstairs and pretended to be fine. Everyone was so excited to see you, you didn’t want to ruin that. You couldn't let them see how broken you felt. You had to be okay. You couldn't make them worry about you again, especially Steve. So you smiled and laughed, pretending your hands weren’t hurting from your nails digging into the palms.

After a long night, you went to your new house, you couldn’t make it to the bedroom with how emotionally exhausted you felt. So tired, that you couldn’t even make sounds as you silently sobbed on the sofa until you eventually fell asleep.

You woke up with the promise today would be a better day, last night you just slipped into your old self. You were better now. No stupid ex could ruin your progress. You needed to get some groceries for the house so at least you had something to distract your mind for a little while.

As you drove in your new red Ford (well it was a used ford from a couple of years) to the grocery store you expected everything to look different, but to your surprise, it was the same. The florist with the pink lettering on the window spelling out its name Haley’s, the paint had slightly started to peel but it was still there. The 50% off at the clothing boutique. Even the graffiti that was on the side of the market was still there, from four years ago. The town was stuck in a time warp, maybe it wouldn’t take as much time to adjust.

Grabbing a shopping cart you slowly walk down the isles not sticking to the list you wrote at home. Picking up all sorts of snacks. You had missed American cuisine. Your cart was getting full. I guess it’s true what they said about how you shouldn't come shopping on an empty stomach. The cart was old and rusty, meaning the fuller the cart got the harder to steer it was. The wheels screeched and lagged every time a new item was added. You turned the corner to enter another aisle when the left wheel furthest away from you decided to jam, ramming you into a customer's cart.

“I am so sorry” you look up at the old man wearing a cap. Maybe it wasn’t your ex you were a magnet too, maybe it was just the Munson’s. He frowned at you. Okay so maybe not everything was the same. Wayne was known for being grumpy to others but you only knew him as a sweetheart he was never anything but kind to you. You had never seen him look at you like this. There was a disappointment hidden beneath his eyes, that you, unfortunately, didn’t miss. “For what? Bumping into my cart or breaking my son’s heart?” You don’t know what you expected him to say. But maybe silence would have been better. The words stung you.

His son was the one to break your heart, not the other way around. Sure it might have hurt him when you left, but how were you supposed to feel when he didn’t give you a choice? And the only way of having part of him was taken away from you.

“Do you want me to be your little housewife and have food on the table ready for when you get back from your big successful job?". You stared in disbelief despite the thoughts building like a storm in your head. “Is that what you think?” He hated when you used that voice. The one where it sounded like you were about to break.

It made him hate himself more than he already did. Maybe this is why he was treating you this way. Seeing if you take his bait, to see if you thought he was as worthless as he felt. He didn’t want to hear that voice in his head, he didn’t want to see the disappointment on your face right now, he just needed something to numb it all. So he turned away from you in search of a blunt, a pill, powder, anything.

His turning away from you, caused the storm to break loose, this was the end and he wasn’t even kind enough to break up with you in words. “Fuck you” you whispered and left. You got in your car. Driving as far as you could from him. You could see just enough to get as far as the Family Video which wasn’t a long way from the trailer park before your tears completely cover your eyes sight. You pulled up not wanting to risk anyone’s life. breathing heavily, panic intensifying. In comprehensive words being screamed from your mouth. Cursing out to the universe, Eddie and apologising to the life in your stomach.

God how you wanted to curse his nephew out and tell Wayne the whole truth. But as Eddie said you were nothing so why did it matter anymore? You did hate how you had never said goodbye to the man who took you into his family so easily. Making sure you were always welcome. Making sure your favourite snacks were in his home despite not having the money and living paycheck to paycheck. So you just said “I’m sorry Wayne” he didn’t need to know that it was an apology to him, not his nephew.

His face didn’t change, you guess this was the Wayne Munson everyone talked about, the cold-hearted, scary guy. You had never been on the receiving end of this version of him but it was frightening. So you looked down, scared if you look up for a second more you would cry. “That kid already had a hard enough life, he didn’t need you promising him a better one and then being like the rest of them. You messed him up so bad that he’s only now just starting to smile again. So if you plan on staying don’t you dare hurt him again”. With that threat he left. You wanted to leave the store than to wallow, but you stood in fear not wanting to cross paths with a Munson again. “Are you okay ma’am?” a shop clerk addresses you. You nod “I’m fine thank you.”

Thankfully you wouldn’t cross paths with another Munson today as Wayne had gone to work and the younger Munson was still in bed hungover. Deciding not to come into work today, he might as well have gone in with how many times Sarah had called, asking how to do things, that she should know how to do. Hearing the constant rings and her voice was giving the boy a headache. Eddie didn’t realise she was only doing this to make sure he was okay, it wasn’t like him to call in sick. After plumping his pillow and changing positions back and forth, he found a comfortable spot and started to close his eyes.

The phone rang again, and he groaned. Picking it up now pissed. “Come on Sarah you called 10 minutes ago, you’re a floor manager you should be better than this. Use some instinct, I shouldn’t have to hold your hand through this”. A male’s chuckle made him realise that it wasn’t his employee on the phone. He knew that laugh anywhere and right now he would have preferred to hear from Sarah 20 more times if it meant not talking to Harrington. “You seem like such a lovely boss” Steve joked, hoping to gauge Eddie’s mood. When he didn’t laugh back or make a snide remark, when he was met with silence. He realise how pissed Eddie was, he was never the quiet type.

Steve sighed “look I know I should have given you a heads up, trust me I was going to. I just got so excited about having her back that I didn’t think-“. Eddie rolled his eyes cutting in “yeah you didn’t think”. Steve ignore the rise Eddie was trying to cause and continued. “I was going to tell you, I just didn’t expect you there, not that I didn’t want to see you. I just didn’t know Dustin invited you. I hoped the first time you met again would go better, I didn't plan for it to go like that”. If the men were in the same room, Eddie might have hit the boy, even if he didn’t mean it. With the rage he was feeling. “Better? Do you really think we could ever get along, After what she did?”.

"shut it Munson" Oh, it was definitely a good job they weren't in the same room. Steve didn’t snap anymore. He tried not to raise his voice because he hated how it made him feel like his father. But he would not have Eddie speak about you like that. Especially with what he did. He had come so far with Eddie, after the first couple of months of the incident he couldn't even look at him. But after time he forgave and tried to understand the boy. But he never forgot. How could he forget?

Steve was blinded by the headlight pouring into the shop window. After a long 12-hour shift he was super tired and didn’t need this. He left the shop storming over to the car, about to tell the jerk off. Until he came closer and realised it was your car. He walked over quicker, wondering what you were up to. Were you trying to be funny, by annoying him? He supposed this is what best friends did. He grabbed open your door, trying to scare you. To get his own back. However, as soon as the door opened, he saw you hysterically crying, clutching your stomach. He got down to his knees in front of you, rubbing your arms. “It hurts so much”.

He wanted to cry looking at you like this, you were always the strong one. The anchor in his life. No matter how scared or how much of a dick he was, you brought him back to earth. You were never like this. You squeezed your eyes in pain, holding your stomach tighter. This was worse than the pain he felt when Nancy left, worse than anything with the upside down. This was the most heartbreaking thing he had ever seen. But he had to be as strong for you as you had been for him. So he sniffed back up the tears. “What hurts y/n?”. You pull his hand from your arm to your stomach. “It hurts Steve”. He couldn't be sure, he hoped it was just stomach pain and not... God, he hoped it wasn't that. All he knew is that he needed to take you to the hospital. “Can you move?”

Eddie wasn't used to this version of Steve, even when they weren't friends Steve hadn't spoken to him like this. At that moment he realised that if there was a choice Steve would always pick you, and maybe all his friends would always pick you. Why was he the only that hated you? At that moment he felt more alone than he had in years. It made him scared, he couldn't be abandoned again. He felt like a child scared of his dad, feeling like he disappointed him. With how quickly Steve was to turn his back on him he wondered if everyone else felt the same. Was he just a place holder until you came back?

You had left, he had stuck around. Sat with his friends while they cried. Make them laugh on bad days. Trained Dustin to be a Dm. Went to hospital appointments with friends. Stayed awake talking them down from nightmares. All while suffering from his own traumas. He never complained because that's what friends do. Especially when they had gone through what they had. You left everyone, and now you could just come back, and everyone would love you. What do you know about hard?

“She got to leave, it couldn't have been that bad.” Steve growled through the phone “you don’t know shit Munson” he slammed the phone down. Eddie was all alone, well not completely, he had his thoughts. He was now wishing for Sarah to call. He felt like he was being smothered by thoughts, what did Steve mean? Eddie might have been mean that night to you, but surely it wasn't enough to qualify this sort of response. How had you had a hard life? Had something happened? Was he missing something? He shook his head. No, he hated you, he needs to keep it this way. He picked up the phone and rang Sarah, as soon as he heard her voice he spoke. “Come over after work”. He slammed the phone down. He needed to forget, Sarah could help with that even if it was only a couple of hours.

A couple of hours before the thoughts would come back and he was swarmed by curiosity, pain and loneliness.

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Overwhelmed (Vinny x Garmadon)Part 50

(I suggest you check out parts 1-49 if you haven't already)

It was the next morning and by that it was 6:27am and Vinny woke up, he didn't have work for 3 more hours but he wanted to go for a run before work and get up early in general. He also wanted to make his own coffee since he prefers black coffee rather than coffee with sugar or milk he also wanted to see if Zane was awake so he could check out his stab wounds. The cameraman yawned as he woke up and looked beside him thinking he was going to find Garmadon, "Oh right...he isn't here..." Vinny thought as he got up and stretched.

Vinny looked through his clothes and pulled out his signature white shirt, blue jacket and dark green trackpants. He went to the bathroom quickly and washed his face to refresh himself and wake up properly but ended up standing there with his hand under the warm water for 5 minutes. Once he finished he got dressed and grabbed some bandages and stuffed them into his dark green duffle bag. He also put a water bottle and he dagger in there. The cameraman left his bag in there for the time being and went out to the kitchen.

No one was in there like the past few days probably because he was up early, Vinny began making black coffee with three shots of expresso, because I've confirmed he's a coffee addict. The cameraman also made a shower like the one from yesterday, he made two of them, one for now and one for his so called 'work' he had today, and maybe to give to Rida? After that Vinny decided to see if Zane was awake he didn't want to go straight to his room and decided to go into the armoury, it took him a moment to realise how the elevator worked but he learned eventually and went down.

Vinny went down and looked around, he saw Zane at the computers while Pixal was working on some mechs. "Umm...hey you two?" The cameraman said awkwardly catching the two nindroids attention. "What can we do for you?" Pixal asked as she looked up from the mech she and her mini Pix's were melding. "Umm...well I need a few wounds checked out..." Vinny said awkwardly as he looked away. The two nindroids looked at the cameraman curiously, "What types of wounds? And where?" The ice ninja asked as he devoted all his attention to Vinny.

"Uhh...stab wounds...on my hand and foot..." Vinny muttered out just loud enough for the two to hear. "Stab wounds...? From where? It couldn't have been an accident if it's on your hand and foot" Pixal spoke as she jumped off the mech she was working on. "C-can you two just not ask questions and check it...please?" The cameraman asked desperately not wanting to answer, he knew very well he couldn't fool the two nindroids unlike the rest of the ninja they could tell emotion.

"Very well" Zane spoke out as he signalled for Vinny to sit on a chair which he did along with Pixal and Zane. The ice ninja held out his hand in a way to signal Vinny to show it. The cameraman did show it and it caused the two nindroids to be a little surprised, the two also looked at he burns on Vinnys' arms. "How long have you had this?" Pixal asked curious as she observed the wound, it was really deep, "A few days..." Vinny replied as he avoided eye contact. "This stab wound is recent but the burn isn't it was from Garmadon, am I correct?" The ice ninja asked earning a nod from the cameraman as he felt sadness thinking about the oni.

Zane didn't stay anything but instead grabbed a medical box and pulled out some disinfectant wipes, "The chance of it getting infected is high...and you have one on your foot as well, but you didn't tell anyone? You're lucky it hasn't been infected yet and it's good you decided to come here. You also need stitches" Zane spoke as he started to disinfect the wound cause Vinny to wince in pain. "May I take a look at your foot? You might need stitches on that as well" She spoke softly earning a nod from the cameraman as he tried his best to ignore the pain.

Pixal took a close look and grimaced slightly, "May I ask who stabbed you...?" She asked, causing Vinny to immediately shake his head, "I will admit I was stabbed but I won't say by who and if you think it was Garmadon it wasn't" The cameraman spoke causing the two nindroids to sigh as the both disinfected the wounds. "You are fine with us giving you stitches, it'll heal faster" The ice ninja spoke in his calm voice. The cameraman nodded as he sighed out tiredly, he had his coffee mug with him and drank from it.

Zane grabbed the appropriate needle for stitching human and gave one to Pixal. The two ever so carefully stitched Vinny up, the cameraman would let out the occasional wince of pain, Pixal insisted on Vinny using numbing cream but he denied. After a while the two were done and the cameraman let out a sigh of relief. "Thanks you two...can you not tell anyone about this though?" Vinny asked as he looked at his hand and pulled two fingerless gloves from his pocket and put them on. "We'll try" Zane and Pixal said in unison.

Vinny thanked them once more before going back up and putting socks and shoes on. The cameraman came back out and saw Garmadon and Wu talking, Vinny heard his name be mentioned due to the two not noticing him. The cameraman knew Garmadon probably was talking about what happened. "Morning...I'm gonna go to work now..." Vinny mumbled as he walked past Garmadon and Wu pretending he didn't here himself be mentioned.

Garmadon looked at Vinny worriedly as he walked away, he knew Vinny wasn't going to work and knew Vinny had work at 9:30 and right now it was 8:30 am. The cameraman wanted to go for a run to clear his mind and went down the elevator and began jogging with his duffle bag across his chest like a handbag. As Vinny made it down before entering the city a voice called him in an alley, he followed it keeping his hand on his dagger in his pocket.

Suddenly Vinnys' arm was grabbed but Vinny was faster and managed to get the person into a chokehold holding the dagger at their throat. "Holding the dagger I gave you against my throat?" The person said, before the cameraman realised it was Rida, "S-shit sorry, I thought you were someone else" Vinny apologised as he let Rida go, "No it's my fault I do admit mysteriously calling your name from an alley and grabbing you isn't the nicest greeting" The orange eyed man said softly, this made Vinny chuckle softly.

"Going for a run? Can I join?" Rida asked earning a nod from Vinny. The two began jogging, but Vinny still couldn't shake the feeling that Rida was hiding something.

(So I hope you enjoy this I've managed to upload 2 parts in less than a week and that makes me happy hope you enjoy Vinny angst)

[teeswrites]

LN- All roads lead to you

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Masterlist

-----------------------------------------------------------Last chapter! I made a little text in the end, please read it. Also, I found a song I used to listen to when I was younger and it fits perfectly to the story. I will link it at the end (so there're no spoilers) if you like to listen to it.

Without further ado, enjoy :)

-----------------------------------------------------------

Chapter 8 (final): Austin... again (feat. Mexico City)

October, 10th, 2022

Guangzhou Baiyun International Airport, Guangzhou, China:

10:38 PM

Since Suzuka, she hasn't heard about Lando. He said he would text her but he didn't. At first, she didn't even notice cause she woke up late and almost lost the start of the race. After that, she went out with Pierre and Yuki, some Yuki friends, and Daniel for a round (or many rounds) of sake. As a result, she ended up with a bad hangover and an early flight to Amsterdam with a stopover in China. And of course with an Australian lad on her hair.

She was sitting next to Daniel with a chai latte in her hands. She had her hoodie on and sunglasses for the hangover "I should have never drank that amount of sake" "Me neither, Dan. Me neither" in that moment, in that cold airport in China with a Starbucks cup burning her fingertips, she remembered she had a phone. She opened Whatsapp and looked into her messages, she scrolled down the screen and stopped at Lando's contact. The last message from him was October, 8th at 6:18 PM: 'I'm already here :)'. Which took her to the question mark expression on her face. 1 day, 17 hours, and 20 minutes and Lando didn't say a word to her. He said he would text on the race day. "Son of a bitch" "Hey, Dan" he hummed "Do you know about Lando?" "What do you mean?" "Don't hear about him since classification day" "Do you talk frequently?" "No, but... What do you know about him?" "Well, the last time I saw him was at Suzuka on race day. He was a little off, you know?" "Off?" "Yes, like his head was in another place". She turned white like a ghost. Just as he was when left the hotel room. Fuck.  "Oh! Do you think he is okay?" "I've no idea. Why?" "He told me he was going to text me, but he didn't" "Did you fall on his web?" "I... No! He was supposed to text me about a resort in Mexico. I told him the other day I will spend a week in Cancun and two in Punta Cana, he already has been there so he told me he was texting me some tips". Daniel looked at her and nodded his head "Did you sleep with Lando, didn't you?" She took off her sunglasses and looked into the Aussie man's eyes "Yes, twice" "Nooo, darling! You weren't supposed to sleep with Lando! He's in his fuckboy era" "Exactly why I slept with him" she wore the sunglasses again "You are not expecting him to be romantic are you?" She kept silent "What have he told you?" "It's not what he said, it's what he did" "What?" "He took me to a winter Sakura festival in Tokyo" "But it's not winter" "exactly, he paid for it" he widened his eyes "You were naive. People like Lando right now would do anything to have sex with their current target" she thought about Abu Dhabi but Daniel didn't have to know about it "Especially him that have a lot of money to spend and a lot of targets to hit" she was about to retort but Daniel probably was right "Should I text him?" "You can do it but then you will be just one more girl who doesn't know how to have a casual relationship based on sex for him". she looked at his contact "Probably yes" and blocked her phone again. She sipped on her chai and laid her head on Daniels's shoulder "I just want to go to drain all the sake from my bloodstream" He chuckled "did you imagine Yuki drank like that?" "Not in a thousand lives" "We should have taken him to Amsterdam with us" Daniel huffed "The kid would go crazy".

//

A week later

October, 23th, 2022

Circuit of The Americas, Austin, Texas.

She watched from distance Lando giggling with a group of giggly girls. "Does he think I am cool?" She asked herself "Because it's been 14 dias since we texted the last time. And he doesn't seem to care". In her opinion, they were just both too proud for it. But apparently, he still had the same habits. When the girls dispersed, she approached the McLaren's driver and touched his right shoulder without saying a word. He turned and a silly smile on his face seemed to fade away. He took a moment to fake another smile "Oh, hi!" "Hi, Lando" "How are you? I... I am sorry for not texting you. I was going to but..." He hoped she would complete his phrase so he wouldn't need to invent an excuse himself but he got nothing but silence "I was busy, you know?" "Really?" she said with an incredulous tone "You were busy? For 2 weeks? So busy you couldn't even send me a voice message?" "Well... Yes!" "Like right now?" "Hum?" "The girls" "what about them?" "You have been busy like you were with them?" He didn't have to say anything, he couldn't hide the truth. At least not from her. "If you wanted to talk to me, why didn't you just text?" "I had the feeling I wouldn't get anything but an empty answer after 5 days of an agonizing wait" "I don't know why are you acting like that. If you came here to be rude with me you should have stayed home" wow. How rude could Lando be when he was defensive? She decided to act like an adult because one of them needed and clearly Lando was not going to be the one "I just wanted to talk, didn't mean to be rude" she said in the most neutral voice tone she could find. He took a few seconds to listen to the words he had said to her and took a deep breath to calm himself. "What do you want to talk about?" "What happened? I mean, you felt distant when you came back to the store in Tokyo. I thought it was just an initial shock and you were tired but you just missed. You always do that when we finally get along. Why?" She knew he was afraid of commitment but she wanted to hear his perspective "I was going to text you in Suzuka but I was not good and I knew I would make you feel upset too, so I just took some time to myself to think" "In which conclusion did you get?" "None really" "none?" "I mean, I know I want you. I just still struggle to make it only the two of us. Then you come and get jealous because I was with some girls and it becomes even more difficult" he was pissed "I just don't like when you flirt with other girls in front of me. It makes me feel insecure" "No worries, next time I'll flirt with them out of your sigh" She took a deep breath, she was opening herself to him, talking about her feelings, and being vulnerable and he was making jokes about it"I was just flirting, what's the matter?" "What's the matter?" she chuckled, almost without patience already "yeah, I was not touching anyone or doing anything but flirt. What's so bad about it? Also, if you feel insecure, that's your problem, not mine" "What do you think a relationship is about?"

"You're aware we are not a couple, right?". She had enough. She asked Lando to talk not to fight but he was crossing all the fine lines that existed between them already "Yeah. I was good with living with that but when you came to my house and said you wanted to be in my life again, or when you asked me to a 'second first date' as you denominated it, and paid for having a damn festival only because I wanted to see the fucking sakura, when we were so intimate..." her voice failed fue the tears she was holding back "I thought you at least wanted to be one" "You know what?" Lando licked his lips and started "you used to make things lighter but now every time we are together it's the same shit about other girls and relationships, and it turns out you just make everything even heavier now!" When he finished the last word, all he could see were wavy eyes and hurt feelings. She turned bet back to him and started to distance herself from him. Both physically and emotionally. Then she stopped to say one more thing to the British man "You are being an asshole. If you want me to walk away, you should say it. It would make things way easier" She said seriously and rawly, and continued to walk. Lando crossed too many lines with her already. He threw his head back and sighed, frustrated "Fuck".

...

Later that day:

"Can you, please, eat something?" "You know I don't like eating before racing," he said, nihilistically "Lando" he had an arm stretched on the table with his head laying on it. Without giving himself the effort to move an inch, he grumbled something that should sound like a "Hum?" "Are you alright, love?" Charlotte asked, sincerely concerned with the younger one "I am just not in the mood for eating" he had been like that since the fight. It didn't make him any better person. To get even worse he couldn't take her out of his mind. "Are you sure?" "Yeah. I'm fine" "I understand you don't want to eat, but you must do it" The blonde lady did not get any answer "If you don't, you can faint in the car and cause a big crash". Not a single word left the Britishman's lips. "I ain't going to let that happen" he sighed, knowing Charlotte was not only right, but wasn't going to let that go till he ate something.

He lifted his head and stretched his arm and spine "You're right! I'll eat, ok?" "Can I trust you?" "Can you start to really trust me? Cause I know you don't really mean when you say you do" "It would be easier if you acted as someone I can really trust" "It would be easier if you really trusted me!" Why none women trust him? "Lando!" "I'll eat" "Good! Thanks". Charlotte was going to enter another topic when his peripheric vision caught her frame. Should he invite her for lunch? Yeah! That's the best way to make amends: eating in a nice restaurant with good company. He stood up in a sudden move "Okay, okay. See you later, Charlie" "I didn't finish talking!" but he wasn't listening anymore.

He walked toward her and touched her right shoulder, lightly. Just like she did with him before. She turned to him, and her smile faded away. Just like he did with her before. He hadn't noticed before, but she was dressed as a cowgirl. Like those girls who go to rodeos. She had a pink glittery tank top, denim shorts, in a pocket the words cowboy pillow laid with humor on her left glute, long black cowboy boots, and a black hat with some pink details on the sides. She looked amazing and he could handle not having her again. "Hey... You look beautiful. I mean you always are but this outfit makes you look..." She cut him "What do you want?" "What are you doing here?" "Going to watch the race. Last year I missed it cause someone made me very upset. But this year I won't let anyone get in my way" he knew what she was talking about "I know that. But... right now. Did you have lunch already?" "Yes, with Dan" "Oh! What about dinner can I take you out to dinner?" "No" "Why not" "I don't want to. And I am going to have dinner with someone already" "You what?!" "What's wrong?" "With who?" "A guy I know" "Is it because of what I told you?" "Why else would it be about?" "You're acting childly" she leaned forward and said close to his face "You know we are not a couple, right?" "Sorry for that" "No, you're right. We are not a couple. So you can flirt with your girls and I can have dinner with this guy". For the first time, he understood how she felt during all the period they'd been together "But..." her phone started to ring: 'Giaro 💛💛'.

"The hot Italian model?!" he thought "And he has two hearts?!" "I should pick this up before I make you feel even heavier. Excuse me". Was he her date? She must be kidding him. He could feel the vendetta running in her veins, this could be the only reason she would do something cheeky as it. "You're not going to win this one," he said to himself while staring at her laughing at the phone call.

"Have you eaten already?" Charlotte asked him out of the blue "Fuck! Don't show up like that!" he placed a hand on his chest "Not yet. I'm going now" "I'll join you just for assurance" "See? You don't trust me!".

...

At night:

He was going crazy alone in that hotel room. He was sitting on the edge of the bed, all dressed up to go out, in his hand was his phone. He waited desperately for a call or text from her. "She's crazy" he mumbled to himself "I am the one looking like crazy" he stopped to shake his leg "Fuck it!" he stood up, grabbed his wallet, and hotel key, and walked out the door. Now he had a free pass from her to flirt with other girls "Why am I still here?" he mumbled to himself inside the elevator. Hoping he would forget all of this when he first stepped into the club.

But nothing really changed. Even with all the alcohol in his bloodstream. He was trying to think about the models around him but his mind went back to her. When a blonde lady "accidentally" touched her fingertips on the back of his hand, he couldn't stop thinking about her hand touching another guy's hand over the table. When a brunette touched his knee softly, all he could think was about her knee touching another man's knee under the table. The worst one was when a freckled redhead brushed her ass on his pelvis and he only imagined the Italian's bodies colliding together in bed. Damn. How could he party with those thoughts in his mind? So he decided to call it a night and went back to the hotel. He lost the count of how many times he thought about calling her. Or send that voice message she wanted him to send so much. Or how many drinks he pushed down his throat thinking about her. He even thought he was hallucinating when he passed by a restaurant near the hotel and saw her. It was her and a very handsome guy.

They were all giggly to each other and without his control, a jealous, furious, and drunk version of himself walked toward the table, grabbed her wrist, pulled her against his chest, ignored all her protests, jumped in the pool, and then kissed her. Kissed her fully, desperately, possesively. His tongue danced on her mouth, and his grip on her waist felt so perfect, that he was shivering. Maybe because of the cold water but mainly because of her body. They had no air anymore but his numb neurons didn't care. She felt another hand pulling her from against Lando and bringing her to the surface. Then the same hand pulled Lando to the surface and punched him in the nose. She took the biggest breath of the whole weekend and separated Giaro from Lando before the British man could punch him back "Stop!". She realized how that scene was looking: two grown-up men punching each other like two high school boys, one of them bleeding in the pool of a fancy and expensive grilling restaurant, and a girl who was almost crying in between them. She looked around: everyone looked catatonic.

"Why did I do this, stupid?" he asked himself, now he's going to kill me "Lando! What the fuck?" He tried to touch her wrist but she splashed some water on him and went out of that pool "Ti chiamo dopo, Giaro" "Vuoi un aiuto, bella?" "No, lasciami stare. Si? E anche lui, per favore" "Okay" the Italian man nodded, without agreeing but he would respect her decision. Lando also got off the pool to chase her. "E io mi occupo di tutto questo disordine. Solo" Giaro complained to himself.

...

"Hey!" Lando shouted "Please, wait!" She stopped, impatient "So. Explain yourself, idiot! What the fuck do you have on your mind?" "Did you see what your guy did to me?" she couldn't believe he was victimizing himself. She looked into his eyes "You deserved! You deserved even more! What's wrong with you?! What was your plan? Throw me in a pool and then kill both of us asphyxiated? So we would die together and kiss for eternity" "I don't know why I've done this, sorry!" "I'm tired of it! You keep on this 'want me, don't want me' game. 'Want to be with me and 7 more girls at a time, want to be with me only'. You tell me we are not a couple, I go out with a friend I've known since I was 7, you freak out and now your nose is bleeding, Giaro's fist is hurt and my dress is wet!" "I already apologized!" "You are such a confusing person that you are turning me into a confusing person as well! Do you know that?" A friend. They are friends. "I just don't want you to be with other guys" he said, ashamed of himself the same way she did before when they first fought "But you can be with everyone you want to?" "Yes. I know that's fucked up but... it's how I truly feel" "Fuck it! I don't want to be next to you right now. Or ever again" She turned her back to leave, but he held her arm " Wait!" "No!" she retreated with her arm "I'd enough of you already. Please, don't look out for me anymore", then she walked away from him.

Lando ended the night drunk, alone, with blood on his new white shirt and with water on his trainers. The opposite of what he thought it would be. He stared at his phone, her name with a pink heart in front of it. He never had the opportunity to show her. Or to confirm if she liked pink. He scrolled to his contacts and called Max Fewtrell "I think I fucked up everything this time".

//

October, 31st, 2022

Mexico City, Mexico

Lando thought she was going to be in the race but he was mistaken, cause when Sunday came and she did not appear there. She posted a picture from the airplane and wrote right above Mexico City. It turns out she was there for other business.

The day before race, Lando was following Daniel around the hotel "Daniel, you must tell me" "Bro, I don't know what you are talking about" "You do know. I know she's in Mexico, she posted on her social media" "Why don't you simply ask her?" "She wouldn't pick up the phone, or text back. And even if she does, she wouldn't tell me where she is" "So I shouldn't tell you" "Daniel" he stopped in front of the Aussie man, forcing him to stop walking, and held his shoulders "I am trying to fix the shit I've done. Can you, please, help me?" "You should have texted her when you told you would" "I know that but I decided to change, to fix everything. But I need you to tell me where she is" Daniel could see the despair in Lando's eyes. He could see he was up to do anything to find her, with or without Daniel's help. He huffed "She's at Costa Esmeralda" "Where?!" "Is in Veracruz" Lando grabbed his phone and started to search "La Guadalupe beach, you'll find her there" "4 hours?! Shit. Thanks, Dan" Daniel held his wrist "Don't do more damage than you already have done" "It's what I intend to"

...

October , 31st, 2022

Playa La Guadalupe, Costa Esmeralda, Veracruz, Mexico

She was standing looking at the ocean, she knew he was coming, Daniel warned her. And when the time came, when a hand found its way to her left shoulder, she knew it was him. She turned around and protected her eyes from the Sun with her forearm"You really can't do what people tell you to, can you?". He remembered the phone call with Max in Austin:

' "Max?" "It's pretty early here in the UK just for you to know and maybe consider calling another time. Just maybe" "I think I really fucked up everything this time" Max could feel the sadness in his voice "Have you been crying?" "Yes" his voice failed "Yes, I did" "What happened?" "I told her I would text but I didn't, today we met in Austin, and she came to talk to me, I said very rude things, such as "You make my life even heavier than already is" and she went out with a guy to make me jealous but they were just friends, I went out, got drunk, jumped in a restaurant pool with her, almost killed her drowned, her friend punched my nose and she said she never wants to see me again" Max definitely needed more information about the chaotic 24 hours Lando had in Austin but he didn't need to hear anything more not even a syllable for getting into the conclusion he already has gotten back in last year's Austin: they were no good to each other "Lando..." he took a deep breath " What do you want me to say?" "What do I do now?" "You leave her alone" "What?!" "You stop calling, texting, chasing her. You stop appearing in her house and you stop following and stalking her on social media. That's what you do now" "Why should I do that if I love her?" it was the first time he admitted that out loud "You do even if you love her, you guys can only hurt each other. You know that, I know that, and she knows that too". How could Max tell him something like that? He got angry with his roommate "You are a very shit adviser. Good night, Max" and hung up on the British lad's face. Max already expected that behavior from Lando. He also knew he would realize it was the right thing to do, sooner or later.'

Lando's head went back to the present "No, I can't" "What now, Lando? What rude things will you tell me now?" "You were right. I've been acting confusingly. I'm sorry, I'll do better from now. I'll be better for you" "No, you won't. We both know you won't" his eyes started to get wavy "Don't do this" She placed her hand on his face "We both will go crazy like that" he placed his hand over hers "It must have another way. I'll..." he tried to think but his mind was in shortcircuit "...stop going out, I won't..." Everything was a blank space in the moment he realized the reality "...even look to other girls, I'll do everything you tell me to do, be only yours..." "Will you change yourself entirely just to fit in my standards?" then he heard himself, she was right. She shouldn't diminish her standards for him, she didn't deserve any less than what she demanded from him since they first met. And he shouldn't change himself to be with her. They were simply incompatible "Please..." he whispered "We need to" she smiled with her lips "But don't worry. If we're meant to be, all roads will lead me to you" he smiled, a tear rolling down his face "By now we must follow different paths, yes?" He dried the tears that rolled down and swallowed the rest of them "I believe it's the best" she smiled "Come here" She opened her arms for a hug and he pulled her against his bare chest. He held her tightly, he breathed all of her in. Intoxicating himself for the last time. When he let her go, she held his hand "Good luck in Brazil" and started to walk away. He held her hand till the last finger slipped away "Thanks" "Bye, Lando" she waved "Bye bye" he waved back and watched her fade away to the shore.

He took a deep breath and switched his gaze to the ocean, he saw the waves come and go but never die. Maybe they were waves and maybe now that he let her go he could be a better person, a better version of himself, and so does she. Till fate join them together again, if it was meant to be.

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Taglist:

@cmleitora

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First of all, the song I mentioned ;)

In second place, I want to show you guys who Giaro is. I know him from Martin Garrix's music video lions in the wild but I don't know if Lando and him actually know each other in real life. I just think he is handsome enough to cause jealousy and he's Italian, so it fitted perfectly.

So, I know most of you expected a happy ending for them. I confess it was the plan when I first started to write this story but it happens that during the process I fell in love with someone with whom I had a complicated relationship, quite very similar to the relationship I wrote for them. Very ironic, no? I will never write about a toxic relationship again lol But the thing here is: I suffered so much till the moment it was decided to call it an end and when I started to work again on ARLTY I couldn't simply put a happy ending to it cause I couldn't let other people read it and maybe have the empty hope that everything was going to be alright at the end (like I did for so long). If you are in a situation like that or know someone who is in a situation like that DO NOT postpone something that is too broken and bruised already. You can't be happy if you have to change yourself or your standards completely to be with someone. So if you all take a time to reflect you'll see that the end was happy. For both, they were free to pursue relationships that would make them truly happy and meet their needs.

It was so good for me to write this one. It's so personal to me (and also has some parts in which I literally narrated my life) that it healed me and it freed me during the process. I can only thank everyone for the support and, of course, please don't send me death threats because of the end lmao

Also, I want to reinforce that I really like Lando, I'm a big fan of him, and this is only fiction and I really hope he's not like this in real life haha

I look forward to writing more fics, maybe about Charles now 🤭 what do you think?

Anyway, thanks for your company till the end and I really hope you liked the story and learned something with it. Lemme know!

A warm hug,

Tees 💜

[seventeenplug]

Seventeen Vernon X Reader

Sulking on set♡

Pairing: Vernon X Reader 

Genre: Fluff

Warning: mentions of puke and just blunt cringe first meeting ;-;

Summary: After long days of not seeing each other, the members of Seventeen decide that it would be a good idea to invite you to the set to cheer up a sulked Vernon.

Word Count : 1,9K

It had been days since you had last had a nice meal with your boyfriend of 6 months, promotions were tight and the comeback was soon, this was to be expected by you. You did know the relationship came with strings attached that could never be cut.

˜˜˜

The two of you had met 6 months prior to the comeback's announcement after meeting on a lonely winter night by the Han River. It was cringy and it was cheesy, but you wouldn't change the fact that your drunkness had caused you to trip over Hansol's leg, which was indeed tucked away and not on your way like you argued that day.

He apologized nonetheless, and you continued on your drunk arguing, finger pointed at him as you accused him of purposefully tripping you, which had never been the case. It wasn't any better when the man laughed at your actions causing you to get even redder with anger. A sudden wave of sickness hit you hard the next second, and before you even knew it you were doubling over and puking your dinner and cheap soju on the man's shoes.

The poor man was surprisingly nonacholantic to it all, and simply patted your back awkwardly as you emptied your stomach on his brand new shoes, that sure made you sober up and after heaving on top of him you woke back to life, standing up straight with wide eyes and covering your mouth.

“I’m so sorry!” You hurriedly said bowing fully at 90º, which was probably not the best idea as you felt your head throb.

“argh” you moaned in pain, grabbing onto your head.

“Are you okay?” the man asked you, your eyes looking ahead, his head lowered to look at you, worry flashing through his eyes, you nod standing back up.

“Your shoes…I’m sorry” you repeated, lips tight into a line as you eyed the disgusting cover on them.

"It 's fine. Really. Are you really okay though? Have you sobered up?” He joked, a slight smile on his face. Your face thankfully already red, doesn’t showcase the way your whole body burned up in embarrassment.

“I think so… I will pay for the cleaner-” you grimaced at the sight of his poor shoes.

“I’ll buy you new ones” you offered, sloppily reaching for your handbag, only to realize that it wasn’t there.

Frantic arms move around your body as your eyes move like crazy looking around the whole place.

“Did you lose something?” he questions, eyes also searching around.

“My…my bag” you sigh, hand moving from grabbing your head to your hair, brushing your hair away from your face.

“Gosh, I’m so stupid…”You mumbled, angry because you’re sober and recalling that you just lost your job and now angry because you’re sober, jobless and lost your wallet, phone and house keys.

You didn’t know it then, you didn’t get why he kept asking what color your bag was, the size and what belongings were inside along with your name. You soon learned that he was an idol as he removed his hood and mask.

He was none other than Vernon from Seventeen and he had just posted about a ‘friend’ who had lost her purse.

Shock wasn’t the best word to describe your feeling when you found out who he was, all of you wished to have superpowers so that you could make yourself disappear and erase his memory of you. Not only was he a famous idol whose group you knew and liked. But he was also your favorite member of said group…

It was a memorable event for the two of you, as by the end of the night and beginning of dawn you had bought him shoes at a local store that was somehow still open.

And then someone claimed the bag as a missing item and Hansol accompanied you to said location of the person who had in hand your belongings to make sure that it wasn’t a hoax nor dangerous.

The person was a girl, also a fan who handed you the bag and whom Vernon spoke to, thanking her deeply with you bowing in the background and thanking her for your life.

After it all, Vernon decided to give you his phone number, just in case you lost something important in public again. Taking use of it, you texted him after you two had said goodbye, him back almost out of sight.

“I lost something” you text.

“What was it?” 

“You” 

Given he came back, a small smile on his face.

The two of you decided to eat something together at 6am.

But now, sitting in your lonely studio apartment, you wondered how he was. He had begun to practice for a comeback as it was merely weeks away and he had a lot to do and practice. It made it hard to text and call each other, but worst to it was the fact that he now barely had time to even hang out with you.

Sitting on your small sofa you looked out your window as a drama played on your tv, the sound almost gone as your focus stayed on the lives outside in the busy streets of Seoul.

“For just how long will they be busy?” you whined, hand thrown back onto the head of the sofa sighing.

On your coffee table, your phone begins to vibrate, the name, ‘Scoops of Icecream’ flashing on your screen, a wide smile breaking out on your face as you hurriedly reach forward to answer the call.

“Hello?” you say, trying your best to conceal your happiness.

“Hey, Hey. Do you think you can stop real quick?” Seungcheol asked, sighing at the other end.

“Why? What’s wrong?” you ask, beginning to worry.

“The kids were playing and now Vernon is sulking over a game of mafia because of Mingyu” you could sense the eye roll, lips tight as you try not to burst out laughing as you hear him put the phone away from his ear to scream for the members to be quiet.

“I’ll be there in 20” you laugh softly.

“Thank you! Gotta go, Hoshi is- HOSHI!” the call disconnects before he can even finish, and you’re almost thankful seeing as if he called for Hoshi there would for sure be chaos occurring.

Just like you had told him you got there within 20 minutes of the call, walking with 4 trays of coffee and a bag filled with snacks that you had hurriedly bought from the stop beside your apartment.

“Y/N!” Dino almost runs as he catches sight of you at the entrance, the members all turning to look at the mention of your name.

Your eyes look around smiling and bowing slightly at everyone until your eyes reach your boyfriend’s.

Alike Seungcheol’s mention, he had a pout on his face, arms crossed over his chest, puppy eyes staring straight at you that almost screamed ‘unfair’.

“I brought coffee and snacks!” you raise the bags before plopping them down onto a nearby table.

“What brought you here?” Joshua smiles as he takes a coffee.

“I heard someone was sulking so I had to check it out” you joke, a loud huff being heard by everyone.

The members looked almost shocked, sure, Vernon liked to show emotion and he was great at expressing his feelings with his face, but noise? They had never expected him to be lousy with words, much less to make cute expressions or noises to catch the attention of someone.

“Mingyu, you should play gently” you laugh bumping onto his shoulder as he takes a chocolate bar from the bag.

“He’s the sore loser. I said that Jun’s the mafia but he didn’t believe me, said it was me and then got killed” he shrugs, to which you laughed.

Vernon finally stands up walking your way, you pout back at him just as he nears you and almost falls into your arms.

“I missed you” he mumbled sweetly, your hand instinctively pats at his back while the other runs through his hair.

“me too”

“Ey! Have some mercy to the single ones” Seungkwan groaned, taking a coffee and walking away with Jeonghan who winked at the two.

“What were you sulking about?” That was the hard question, and it was also the one with the longest response.

“Look! Mingyu was suspicious from the start! He even said he didn't’ know the rules”

“HOW WOULD HE NOT KNOW THE RULES?! TO MÁFIA!" Hoshi’s voice boomed through the music video set, his frame jumping from the couch and racing to the couple who was still standing by the table with the coffee and snacks.

The rest of the groups now watched attentively as Mingyu sipped on his cup, looking up from time to time.

“Mingyu was suspicious and Jun was just…quiet!” Vernon argued.

“I was right, just admit it. You got innocent killed” Mingyu counteredback, gasps heard all around.

“You -”

The argument was long as the three of them, Mingyu, Vernon and Hoshi argued against each other, most of the members having already gone back to the things, meanwhile Jun, alike his game persona per description of Vernon, watched very silently, a small smirk on his face.

His eyes connect with yours, you have to contain yourself not to snicker as the boy winks playfully, telling you all you needed to know. He would do it again.

“Ok, ok. How about this” you intervene between the men.

“Play again, see who is right now and who isn’t” you suggest.

Success, the three men manage to convince the whole group who is gathering around to play again as the staff assign roles.

“You okay? Wasn’t work hard today?” Vernon asks as he laces his fingers with yours, gently squeezing.

“It’s my day off today” you smile, his eyes widened. You could tell he was slightly embarrassed but you easily calm him by squeezing his hand.

“You’re busy, it’s fine. I get it. At least I got to see you today” you smiled comfortingly.

“I’m sorry for not being attentive to you” he pouts once more.

Your eyes lower to his lips, you notice how he puckers them even more, your eyes moving to his, his eyebrows raising playfully as he makes kissy noises.

You laugh, but nonetheless kiss his pouty lips, slightly dry and in definite need of some chapstick.

“I know, I know. I’ll put it on after” he grumbles, already aware of what you would complain about.

He licks his lips, pecking you just once more before he’s called onto the set to film another mafia game.

“Stay here! We’ll go out to eat after, I promise!” He smiles, moving towards his group, his hand still on yours until the very end. You nod enthusiastically, finally far as your hands disconnect and you sit back to watch the chaos.

This time, Joshua and Jeonghan were the mafias…

It was safe to say that Vernon’s bickering and pouting just got worse as he once more got fooled and you had to console the boy for the whole night.

FIN˜

[lolamarlowe65]

𝓘𝓷 𝓶𝔂 𝓯𝓮𝓮𝓵𝓲𝓷𝓰𝓼 //James Hetfield

“The house next door was just sold, i hope the new neighbour will be nice.”

part six of ? part five

disclaimers: smut, age gap (modern day james), slow burn shit, talk about death, cursing, smoking, probably drinking, you read whatever you want but i’m not responsible kay?

Wattpad link

࿓ 𓋪・𖧹 𖤐

Chapter 6 - Necklace

It's Sunday. I woke up with a smile today, thinking about last night. I had such a good time losing myself to the sound of the Doors. I get downstairs and my grandmother says goodbye to me.

Every Sunday she goes to her club to play games with her friends. She could not be able to walk so she'd still go do that. She says it's important for her to be able to hold onto everything. And I get it. I tell her to have a good time and she gives me a kiss goodbye.

I don't have a lot to do today. In fact, I don't have anything to do. So I decided to go back to my room to prepare my grandmother's birthday gift. It's a lot of emotions to dive back into all of my mother's pictures but it gives me some peace of mind. No matter what James said about my smile, hers was so much more beautiful. It's also nice to do my photography stuff again, I feel like I'm finding myself again.

Photography has always been a passion to me. I would organise photoshoots at the ripe age of 10. I love to take pictures of the world. Mostly when it's having fun, capture it at its rare moments of pure joy. I lost it a bit when my mom got sick. But something tells me it may be time for me to start again. Maybe it's because I'm getting my head out of the blue due to my interest in James. It's like I see some light. My brain and heart finally decided to try and move on. It's gonna be hard. I know it. But I have to keep on living.

Some hours later I'm finally done with my grandmother's gift. I put wrapping paper around it and hid it in my room. My grandma never comes to my room, she respects my privacy, but we never know.

I decided to take a walk around the hills, it might do me good to get some air. I walk outside and pass in front of James's house. I look over it while walking. Maybe I could see him. It makes me feel somehow happy to see him. I feel more comfortable towards him. I'm sorry I called him "douchebag" when I first saw his car. Because he's not.

As I pass in front of his house I notice his Camaro is outside and he is closing his front door. He cannot see me from here but I linger a little bit on the shape of his back while continuing my walk.

I arrive at the end of the street. If I take left I can get higher in the hills but I decide to stop to buy some cigarettes and a soda in the store on the corner of the street. I know the guy who owns it a little bit, so after I buy my stuff, he asks me how I've been doing.

"- Hey man, got my package?" somebody asks.

I instantly know it's James. I know his voice by heart now. It's engraved in me.

He truly has this thing for startling me. When he sees me on the side, sipping my soda he smiles. He looks like he's genuinely happy to see me. His eyes lingered on me. Mine too.

"- Oh. Hello Anna." he says, charmingly.

"- Hey Mr. Hetfield." i answer as i take a sip of my soda.

While the owner of the store gives James his package I decide to head out. It's a hot day. I don't need it to be hotter. We are just two neighbours meeting each other randomly in the local corner shop. Whatever lewd things I might have done thinking about him. Whatever thoughtful gifts he may have given me. I have to go back to my life.

"- Hey, where are you heading out?" i hear James ask behind me.

I was just out of the store, he must have gotten out right after. I turn around and put my sunglasses on my head to get a better sight of him. He has sunglasses on too. He looks so gorgeous. He has a necklace on and a simple black shirt. His belt buckle is detailed and goes so well with his style. I can't look away from his belt buckle, I must seem so weird right now. But I just want to unbuckle it. I shake my head slightly and look back into his eyes.

"- In the hills. For a walk. You?" i answer smiling.

"- I need to get something in the studio, that's all. Wanna come?" he asks.

Fuck. I want to come. I want to see where he works and with what. I shouldn't. But everybody knows I will.

"- And why so?" i chuckle.

"- And why not?" he replies quickly.

I give him a sudden laugh.

"- Okay, James, i'm coming."

I'm smiling so hard. So much. It can't stop when we talk.

He walks to his Camaro who is parked just on my side. He opens the passenger door for me to go in. How sweet he is. I get into the car and after he closes the door he bends over the open window.

"- You called me James, Anna." he chuckles.

"- No way i did Mr. Hetfield. I wouldn't." i say, messing with him.

He gave me a smile letting out a quick chuckle and got to the driver's seat. He starts to drive and some heavy metal is playing in the background.

"- What's playing?" i ask.

"- Oh. That's Black Sabbath. Ozzy era. The best." he says passionately. "These guys made it possible for us to even think about playing!" he goes on. "Children of the Grave. Awesome song."

"- I love how passionately you talk about it. I'm happy you love your work. It's rare enough to be noticed."

"- It truly is. I'm glad for all of it. Even if bad shits happens sometimes."

"- Yeah I know."

I thought of my mom. He also looks like he is thinking of somebody. He looks like a wave of sadness came over him. I know what to say to change his mind!

"- Hey James." i put my hand on his forearm, close to his wrist. "I loved your gift." i smile.

He lights up instantly. Like my words made him feel the happiest.

I suddenly understood where i put my hand. I did it without thinking. He sees that i look confused. He puts his hand above mine on his arm, still driving with the hand i'm almost touching. He squeezes my hand lightly and gives me a smile.

"- It's okay." he says to me. "I'm glad you loved it. I hope it gave you a smile." he adds.

"- More than a smile! I danced all evening in my room to the music. Having this piece of my favourite artist is a dream come true, so thank you." i say excited.

He laughs, I guess he's trying to imagine what I looked like dancing like a lunatic all evening.

He removes his hand from mine on a turn and I remove my hand too. Weirdly, I feel a bit empty. His hand. This hand. It gave me shivers. I successfully held back my thoughts for the conversation but now that we are silent again I can't help but wander. How his hands must feel when he touches your thighs. How it must be to feel it lightly choking you. How his fingers taste after he passionately fingered you. How him cupping your face with his hands to kiss you like he would die without you must feel like.

I feel the worst knowing that this attraction is most likely one sided. That i will most likely never be able to satisfy it. That i am sitting in his car, next to him, only wanting to hold him by the waist and never let go. If only he knew that the woman next to him felt lust and love towards him, would he actually be that nice to me? I mean he is a rockstar, so many of them are known to be douchebags when it comes to sex or love. I'm sure he had a lot of groupies and adventures. But would he think I just want that? I have all the respect in the world for groupies. They wanted a good time and they got it. And that's a boss move. But this is not what I want. But James seems so sincere about everything. And at the same time I don't know much about him. James and I are not possible anyway.

The car stops.

"- We're here Anna." i hear James say. "You're all red, you okay?" he proceeds.

I go back to reality. My thoughts about him made me blush so much I couldn't hide it.

"- It's a hot day. That's nothing." i answer.

"- The air is cooler in the studio. It might feel more comfortable." he replies.

How thoughtful. But James. I could be in the Arctic with you, I'd still blush. I could be in a volcano with you, I'd be red because of you.

We both got out of the car and I followed him into the studio.

"- So this is where the magic happens?" i exclaim.

"- Not only but we like this place. It's fitting us."

The studio was big. Something for renown artists. There are guitars and basses all around and a big drum set in the middle. The decoration looks bohemian. The technical equipment is pretty modern but it mixes so well with the old timey feeling of the rest.

"- And what did you need here Mr. Hetfield?" i ask him.

He gives me a glass of water. Probably because I said I was hot before. How sweet.

"- Well, miss, I needed to get a guitar. I want to record some stuff with it at my place and I left it there last night."

I walk in the studio and get to a guitar nicely put in its case. A Gibson precisely.

"- This one?" i ask.

"- Nah this one is Kirk's." he smiles.

He's lying against a table with crossed arms. God his arms. His smile. Cat and mouse. Cat and mouse.

"- Who does what in this band? If you are the singer and rhythm guitarist, then Kirk is the lead right?"

"- Right." he nods. "The Lars your grandmother was talking about is the drummer. Typical of them to be dumb." he laughs. "And Rob is the bassist. Here we are, Metallica."

"- It must be weird for you to explain that to someone, i feel like everybody knows who you and your band are." i mutter.

"- I told you it was refreshing. I feel like you can unravel who I am as much as I do. It feels more normal."

So he wants to unravel me. No. Who I am. Fuck Anna! I swear. But it doesn't make it better at all. He wants to unravel something in me. I smile and look down at a bass.

"- My grandma talked about a Cliff. Who's he?" i ask.

At this moment, I see James's smile drop. He looks melancholic. He puts his hand on his chin and I feel like I said something bad.

"- Well, if you don't want to talk about it it's okay James." i panic.

"- No, no it's okay." he says. "You should know."

I look at him with an interrogative look. I move around to lie against the table with him, ready to hear anything. I make sure he knows he can tell me anything by my posture and I smile at him in the most reassuring way possible.

"- Cliff was our bassist. Since the beginning. To me Cliff, Lars, Kirk and me were a band forever. But we had an accident on tour in 86' and Cliff is the only one who didn't make it. Rob is one of us. But I always thought it would have been the four of us."

I didn't know about that. Even if many surely already knew this story, I'm glad I learned about it from his words. Talking about death and grief is not as simple as two sentences on the internet. And I know now. What he meant by the bad sides of his career. However Cliff was like, he lost a person he was attached to. He lost a friend. And I know how it feels like.

"- It's hard, isn't it?"

Not minding, I put my head on his shoulder. He flinched due to my sudden move but accepted it. A wave of sadness takes over me. I proceed in my talk.

"- It's hard, isn't it? To lose someone you love so deeply. I used to think it would always be me and my mom. That we would always have each other. I was wrong." i pause, my voice starting to shake. "She was diagnosed with breast cancer two years ago. She died two weeks ago. And now I only have my grandmother left. And I know she is not immortal. She has a fragile health. I know sooner or later I'm gonna lose her too." i tremble. "And at the end. There's you. You're left alone. You lose somebody you love and you have to keep on living. You have to do something they can't anymore and that you were doing by their side. Nothing's the same after that."

James wipes my tear with his finger. I didn't even notice I dropped one. He then puts his hand on my shoulder and grabs me tightly.

"- You are courageous Anna. You took care of your mom. And even if you know your grandmother is not eternal you stay by her side, not caring of getting hurt when she will go. Because you want the best for her. Now that takes a lot of balls."

He gets off from against the table. I forgot he's way taller than me. My head can't be on his shoulder anymore and it falls on his chest. As I find my spirits again I get my head off him. This is too much. I can't do that. When my head goes back up I notice he is staring at me. Focused on me. Studying me. We shared something so deep. We have such different lives, and he's seen more. But yet we find common paths in our differences. I'm stuck in his eyes. I know that he took in my words deeply, that they meant something to him, that he was touched just by the way he stared at me. I pass my hand over his necklace and take it lightly between my fingers. What a beautiful pendant. His eyes are almost turning black. Slowly I go up to put my hand on his cheek and all I feel is this tension. This electricity his contact gives me.

"- I'm sure Cliff is proud of everything you and the band have done. Personally and professionally." i tell him.

He puts his hand above mine. And his eyes deepen.

"- And I think you are brave for keeping on. For being here now. With this band and everything you created with it. Because you never gave up." i sweetly smile.

His breathing becomes slower and heavier as his eyes are locked with mine. My hand is still on his cheek, sending electricity everywhere in me. I want him. Now. I don't know if it's appropriate but I want him to lift me up on the table and attack my mouth savagely and passionately. I want my hands in his hair and my legs wrapped around his waist. What we just shared was so deep emotionally. I don't know if I can bare not having its physical equivalent for long. My breath is short and heavy.

His hand removes mine from his cheek and he slowly puts his two hands on mine. Grabbing me tightly, perfectly marrying my jawline with the shape of his hands, holding me like he is afraid I'm gonna disappear. His face approaches and I'm locked on his gaze.

"- Hey what's up man! Came to take the Gibson, I didn't know you were still here." a voice says.

James and I get away from each other in a hurry. I was embarrassed.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

James was about to kiss me. I know he was. And I was about to lose myself in it. So he wants me? He likes me? Does he feel the same as me? I'm so confused. I wish I had the guts to ask him so we could put an end to this game of cat and mouse. I wish he'd say I was delusional and he was not feeling the same as I do. That he has nothing to do with a younger woman like me. But in truth, I want him to say yes. I want him to say he wants me as much as I want him. Because deep down I know that's what I desire.

"- Sorry am i interrupting something?" he asks with a big smile.

He understood what was going on.

This guy has long curly white/grey hair. A naturally tanned skin and a big charming smile. Him and James handshake and I see him look at me in a questioning way.

"- Yeah man. My tranquillity." James jokes. "Anna, here's the one and only Kirk Hammett." he adds.

"- Hi Kirk." i shake his hand.

"- Oh Anna! The beautiful neighbour girl who has a thing for the Doors?" he says towards James. "Hey Anna. Nice to meet you."

"Beautiful neighbour girl" James described me like this to his friends. Or at least they think James thinks of me this way.

I see Kirk take a guitar case and get back to the entry door.

"- Well as much as i want to know more, i don't wanna see James's face anymore so bye!" kirk jokes. "I'm only kidding, we're waiting for me. I'll leave you two to your "tranquillity". It was nice to meet you Anna. Ann? See you next time!" he exclaims.

This guy surely is something. I don't have time to tell him he can call me Ann that he's already gone. I'm left alone with James again. I don't know what to do. I'm still startled about this situation.

"- Ca.. Can you take me home please James? My grandmother is gonna come home soon." i ask shyly.

"- Yea- Yeah of course." he replies.

He sounds as confused as I am.

He takes his guitar case and I follow him silently to his car. The drive is silent and I don't know how to feel. It's not uncomfortable. It just looks like both of us are afraid to say what we want. Soon after he pulls up in front of my house. My grandmother will be back in an hour. I have time to process what almost happened before she comes back.

"- Thanks Mr. Hetfield." i say, with my hand on the door handle.

"- We're back at Hetfield huh?" he laughs.

"- Told you I loved your name." i answer to mess with him.

So we're gonna play like none of this happened? It's probably the best option.

I get out of the car and close the door when I hear James ask me something.

"- Hey... Anna."

"- Yes?"

"- What do you think your grandmother would love for her birthday?" he asks. "I just wanna show her my gratitude."

My heart melts. How sweet it is from him. My grandma got his heart before I could even think about it.

"- She's a badass, I know." i joked.

"- Hell yes!"

I laugh.

"- Well, just get her a bouquet of those peonies you say she looks like. It will make her the happiest."

"- Got it miss." he winked.

"- Haha, goodbye Hetfield."

"- Goodbye Anna."

I arrive on my front porch and look for my key in my bag. Before I turn my head around looking for James. He is still there, he looks like he is lost in his thoughts. I wonder what's in his mind. I let out a sigh and put my key in my door.

Suddenly, I feel a presence behind me. Not a bad one at all. If so, it feels like James. When I see his hand passing something around my neck I understand it's actually him. It's his necklace. He then takes the strand of hair covering my ear and gets it out of his way. I feel his breath against my neck where he leaves a delicate kiss.

"- This is not a gift. This is a promise that you will have to see me again to give it back." he whispers in my ear.

I'm frozen. My breath is heavy. His kiss made me so weak. His lips were the softest things I've ever felt and I want them everywhere on me. If we weren't outside to the view of the world I would have attacked his lips and made him take me against the wall. It's not about paparazzis. I couldn't care less. But some neighbours know me. And I like to keep my life out of their minds.

"- James." i say, almost like a prayer.

"- Ssshh..." he hums. "See you next time, Anna."

࿓ 𓋪・𖧹 𖤐

A/N: I’m about to explode, slow burn is hard to hold on, shit is gonna be quicker. Anyway chapter 7 is coming soon. Love, <33

[beefromanoff]

Going Under - Ch. 6

summary: the morning after...lots of fun, lots of fluff.

characters: Bucky Barnes x OC

soundtrack: sooner or later - popium

warnings: fluff, pop star fantasy x love story, set in an AU where the Avengers reunite after Civil War, pre-infinity war, slight angst, hurt/comfort, lonely reader/OC.

author’s note: wanting to rush into the action I have in mind, but also loving the slow burn and the fluff. UGH, decisions. thanks for reading, xo!

chapter list/links

- xo

_______________________________________________

Bucky woke up to the sound of Gianna Cruz's soft breathing beside him. A sentence that, only a few short months ago, he would have thought only existed in some kind of Mad Libs game. He laid in the plush bed, feeling the warmth from her small body against his right side. Careful not to move, he took a deep breath, trying to comprehend what this meant for their relationship. 

There’s no relationship. She was scared, she didn’t want to be alone, and you’re assigned to protect her. Simple as that. This changes nothing. 

Bucky reprimanded himself for the thoughts running through his head and the electricity running through his right arm as Gianna slept soundly draped across it. He shifted on his pillow and looked at her, her blonde hair splayed across the pillow with it’s natural wave present from sleeping with it wet. He wished Kate would let her natural hair show sometime. Every day she had a show, press, a shoot, or even a fitting - her glam team would leave her hair with big, blown out curls and a face full of makeup. Not that Bucky minded, he loved her concert looks. They reminded him of some kind of princess from a children’s movie, with her gorgeous long locks and outfits so ornate that they glittered wherever she walked. But now, looking at her sleeping, he couldn’t help but think it was a crime that the world never saw this side of her. 

Her light complexion was dewy from sleep, her face completely relaxed. Her lips rested in a pout just above where the comforter was curled beneath her chin. The little blonde ringlets framed her face and made her look almost angelic. Taking a sharp breath, Bucky suddenly needed to move. Lying next to her was testing a part of him that he wasn’t sure was strong enough to withstand it. 

As he sat up to stretch, Gianna stirred beside him. "G’morning," she said, a sleepy smile on her face. Her eyes were still closed, and she yawned, burrowing her face into the pillow. 

Bucky smiled back, feeling the sense of warmth in his chest double with her awake. "Good morning sunshine. How did you sleep?" he asked, his voice coming out as a grumble.

Gianna sat up and stretched, yawning again. "Like a baby. No, like a rock. Thanks for staying with me last night," she said, raising her eyes to meet his..

Bucky shrugged, trying to play it cool. "Ah, it's my job, remember?" he said, a hint of teasing in his low voice.

Gianna rolled her eyes, laughing. "Yeah, yeah. Something tells me that sleepovers weren’t in your contract.”

“If they had been, maybe I wouldn’t have been so hesitant to sign it.” As the words left his mouth, Bucky’s stomach flipped. He was only teasing, but wasn’t sure how she’d handle the overt flirtation.

Gianna didn’t miss a beat. “At least make sure they give you overtime pay for all this extra work.” She winked and gave him a light push, her hand lingering on his chest for just a moment longer than usual. 

He loved how physical she was. She hugged, didn’t shake hands. If she was ever excited about something, anything, she would clutch his forearm as she spoke, eyes wide. When she thanked him at the end of every night when he walked her back to her hotel room, she would squeeze his hand before disappearing behind the door. Her little teasing shoves barely moved him, but on the inside, they knocked him on his ass every time. 

 Let's go get coffee," she said, getting up from the bed. Sometime during the night, she had slipped out of her robe and ended up in an oversized t-shirt. She turned to walk into the bathroom and Bucky caught a glimpse of the front of it. 

Smirking, he called after her. “Nice shirt.” 

It was one of the shirts being sold at the merch tables for her tour. Four variations of her photo were etched onto the front, while all the tour dates and cities were listed on the back. 

“Don’t make fun of me,” She whined, poking her head out the bathroom door as she tucked her hair into a baseball cap. “I actually brought this up here to give to you, and then last night was such a blur and I just grabbed it…” She trailed off, blushing when she saw his amused smile. 

“I don’t wear my own merch, okay.” She put her hands on her hips and raised her eyebrows, looking defensive but smiling all at once. 

“Hey, no judgment from me, if I had my face on a shirt then I’d never take it off.” Bucky held his hands up, feigning innocence. “Unfortunately, that’s more of Cap’s thing.” 

“There you go again!” Gianna laughed. “Name dropping all your famous friends! Oooh, I’m Bucky, I’m besties with Captain America and Black Widow. Ooh, I live with the Avengers, Ooh ooh, Tony Stark is my boss!” 

Bucky rolled his eyes, chuckling at her theatrics. “Okay, first of all, Stark isn’t my boss. Second of all, I definitely name drop you when I talk to all of them. So at least it goes both ways.” 

Gianna paused, halfway through slipping her jeans up under her big shirt. Bucky tried not to look, and tried harder not to make it obvious how hard it was not to look. 

“Don’t tell me the Avengers, the Avengers, know who I am.” She stayed in her crouched position, jeans around her knees and eyes locked on Bucky. 

“G, everyone knows who you are. That’s kinda why I’m here.” 

She straightened up, tugging her jeans the rest of the way and buttoning them. A self-satisfied smile spread across her face as she reached into the closet for her sneakers. 

“Do they listen to my music on secret missions?”

Bucky chuckled again, relieved that she’d finished getting dressed before he really had to put his self control to the test. “We don’t really listen to music on, uh, secret missions.” 

“But if we did, it would definitely be yours.” 

She scrunched her nose at Bucky, and he could tell she was trying to play it cool. It was a feeling he was all too familiar with these days.

“So you name drop me to your friends?” She had finished getting dressed and strode towards where he sat on the edge of the bed. Her eyebrow was cocked mischievously. 

“Ah, maybe once or twice. When I think it makes me sound cool.” 

She stepped closer, standing nearly between his knees. Even though Bucky was sitting down, they were eye level, their height difference less apparent like this. 

“How cool will you sound when you tell them you slept over with me?” Her voice had a hint of joke in it, but her voice was lower, almost alluring. 

“Oh, they’d see right through me.” Bucky diffused with a joke. “They know I don’t have much game, they’d think I’m lying.”

Gianna eyed him, as if trying to decide if he was joking or not. “Maybe we should prove it to them.” 

Before he could respond, she had turned and picked up Bucky’s phone from the nightstand. 

“Take your shirt off.” She instructed as she slid the camera function open. 

“Wh-” Gianna cut him off. “Just do it, trust me.” 

Reluctantly, Bucky grabbed at the back of his shirt and tugged it over his head. He worried for a moment about how Gianna would react to his scars, the ridge where his metal arm fused to his shoulder, but she didn’t bat an eye. On the contrary, he thought he saw her blush, her eyes running down his chest. 

“Get under the covers.” She pointed behind him, clearly amused at his confusion. 

Bucky eyed her as he slipped his shoes off and slid his legs back into the unmade bed. Gianna tossed her hat to the side, stepped over his shoes on the ground and into bed next to him. She wriggled underneath his right arm and tugged the covers up around her shoulder. 

“Here, take our photo.” Gianna thrust Bucky’s phone into his hand. 

She laid her head down on his chest and closed her eyes, burrowing close to his neck. Bucky felt like his skin was on fire where her cheek laid on his bare chest. He swallowed hard and prayed to God and Thor and anyone who would listen that she couldn’t hear his pounding heartbeat. 

He looked up at the phone and realized what she was doing. He took all the confidence he could muster and winked at the camera, snapping the photo.

“Let me see!” Gianna sat right up, snatching the phone back from him. She laughed out loud. “This is PERFECT. Art, really.” She hit the message button and started typing. 

“What’s the name of your group chat? Do the Avengers have a group chat? Do you all even text, or is there some kind of super secret telepathy you use?” 

Bucky gave a resigned laugh. “We have a group message, yeah.” He reached for his phone and typed in “roommates” then clicked the top result. 

“Wanda named it. She thought it was funny.” Bucky said, answering Gianna’s amused look. In two taps, she had sent the photo. 

“Now we’ll see how cool they think you are.” She winked and hopped out from underneath the covers, slipping her shoes on. Sighing, Bucky reached for his shirt. 

“Wait-” Gianna grabbed his wrist. “I have another idea.” She grabbed his shirt and disappeared around the corner into the bathroom. He wondered why the sudden discretion after she’d paused, pants down, right in front of him only a few minutes prior, but was interrupted by a white shirt being tossed at his face. 

Gianna had emerged from the bathroom wearing Bucky’s Stark Enterprises shirt from the night before. He was holding the t-shirt with her face on it, still warm from her body. He opened his mouth to protest, but the ornery glint in her eye made him think better of it. Slipping it over his head, he wondered what he was getting himself into. 

“This may be your best look yet.” Gianna teased, slipping her room key into her back pocket. As Bucky finished putting lacing up his boots, he stood. 

“I hope you’re enjoying this.” 

“Oh I am, and you can’t say no, I had a bad night.” She joked, slipping under Bucky’s arm as he held the door open for her. 

They made their way to the lobby, both with baseball caps on, a half-hearted attempt to be discreet. As they walked towards the sliding glass doors of the lobby, Bucky saw a small crowd of photographers waiting for them. He straightened, quickening his pace to be ahead of Gianna. The switch from their lighthearted morning to his protective nature was immediate. Out of habit, Gianna fell into step behind him, staying close. 

The sliding doors opened with a whoosh and they were bombarded with flashes and questions. 

“Gianna, are you going to press charges after last night?”

“Gianna, what happened at the tour?” 

“Ms. Cruz, will you be increasing security after the incident?”

“Gianna, over here!” 

“Gianna, that new song was an instant hit, did you expect it to go viral so quickly?”

After years in the spotlight, Gianna could easily tune out the constant barrage of paparazzi questions, but the last one caught her attention. Wide-eyed, she looked straight at Bucky. He glanced down at her, a hint of a reaction behind his ever present poker face. 

Thanks to Bucky’s metal arm, they made it to the coffee shop across the street quickly and easily. Once they’d placed their usual orders, Gianna pulled out her phone. 

“Oh my gosh,” She exclaimed. “They were right, our song is everywhere.” She flipped her phone towards Bucky, showing him the trending page on Twitter with her name occupying the top three spots. The first two had to do with her attempted ‘fan’ attack, but the third was #GoingUnder - the name of their song. 

He watched as she scrolled, soaking in all the love for their song after less than 24 hours. Truth be told, he didn’t feel as much excitement about the song being so popular, but the way her eyes lit up as she took it all in made his heart nearly burst at the seams. He wanted to see her overflow with joy every day. 

Bucky found himself feeling grateful that he had been assigned to this case. He had never expected to become so close to Gianna, but he couldn't deny the connection that had formed between them. Over the past few months, they’d gotten closer, but the past 24 hours had taken them to a whole new level. Now, he stood in the middle of a coffee shop, wearing a shirt with her face on it and looking at her proudly wearing his. 

For the second time that morning, he wondered how this was all real. 

As they made their way back to the hotel, they managed to avoid Tom’s manic search for them and slipped back into Gianna's room just in time for her to get queued that the bus was ready to leave for sound check.

As she grabbed her bag, Gianna turned to Bucky with a smile. "Thanks for this morning. It was nice to just be normal for a little while," she said. “I feel like I haven’t laughed like that in a while.”

Bucky nodded, feeling that familiar warmth rise up in him. “Not the worst morning I’ve had," he smirked, reaching for her bag and hoisting it over his shoulder. 

As they made their way to sound check, Bucky glanced down at his phone.

“No fucking way.” - Steve 

“OMGGGGGG, yes! So here for this!” - Wanda 

“Grandpa’s got game. Who knew.” - Tony 

“Groupie isn’t a bad look for you, Buck.” - Natasha

He chuckled and tucked it back into his pocket.

[librosamarillos]

passed down like folk songs

chapter 8: goodbye

Maegor Targaryen x OC

Also on Ao3

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7

Tags: hurt/comfort, friends to lovers, angst, mature themes, targaryen incest, violence, Maegor is a red flag himself, characters are ooc probably, MINORS DNI

Visenya couldn’t remember when she last woke up so peacefully, let alone in her husband’s arms. It felt like such a foreign concept before, to wake up feeling this serene, with Aegon’s comforting warmth. It felt like a delicate dream, one she did not wish to wake up from, in fact, it scared her to think she’d wake up to find herself all alone in her cold bed again. 

Part of her felt ashamed for how much she wanted this. In all their years of marriage, the few times he’d join her in her chambers, she’d always wake up alone. He always ran back to Rhaenys after completing his duty. She always burned with bitterness and  jealousy at how he wouldn’t even try to hide it. Yet, she longed for his closeness so much, she pushed away the suspicions that he was imagining their sister, in order to perform his duty. She was no fool. Even now she was paranoid that it wasn’t her he was seeing, but again, that desperate part of her wanted to cling to the hope that he was finally seeing her as she was. 

She glanced up at Aegon’s handsome face. They were both nearing fifty, but in her eyes, he was more handsome than ever like this, sleeping peacefully and holding her close, the way it always should’ve been. Just them alone. It was selfish and cruel and unfair to feel so grateful that their sister was gone and couldn’t take him from her again, at least not physically. Had she still been alive, Visenya would never know the feeling, gods, this feeling of waking up in his arms. How she envied Rhaenys for having this for all those years. It felt like heaven to have him to herself, at last. 

After their screaming match that day, Aegon had become so attentive to her, almost warm and caring. He started dining with her in both the morning and the evening, seeking her company, not for council, just to be around her, and at nights, he’d join her, not only for sex, just to hold her in his arms and sleep. Was it guilt? Some sick part of her hoped it was eating him up alive, but another wished for him to simply want her. To miss her, to long for her, the way she did him ever since they were kids. She was so torn. 

“I didn’t have you for such a sentimental person, Visenya. Or do I have something on my face?” Aegon asked without opening his eyes, his voice still deep and groggy from waking up. 

“Maybe I’ve always been one, you were just too busy noticing my faults to see it.” she replied lightly, smiling softly. 

Aegon opened his eyes, returning her soft smile. He brought his hand up to her face, rubbing circles on her cheek. Visenya relished in his touch. 

“We should get ready soon.” she said, already wishing for them to return to bed even if they hadn’t left yet. 

“All is prepared, the Hightowers are expected to arrive in the afternoon, it’s still very early, Visenya.” Aegon protested, pulling her closer. 

“I know, I just wish to prepare Maegor.” she countered. 

“Yes, he seems to be brooding.”

“I’ve warned you about this, Aegon.” 

“Give him time. He’ll take great interest in his wife, I’m sure.” he said, trying to assure her. “I heard Lady Rowan will be joining her father back to Oldtown soon. Perhaps it’s for the best, for the time being.” he added. 

Visenya sighed, her peaceful smile now replaced with a frown of guilt. Rowan had been avoiding everyone, and when she couldn’t, she’d pretend it was all fine. She needed to talk to her, to tell her how sorry she was. 

“I know you are very fond of the girl, but things will settle. You’ll have her back soon, will you not?” he asked softly. 

“I’m still mad at you for doing this behind my back, you know. And you saw how furious our son is.” she frowned. 

“I know. But it’s his duty, and I have no doubt that our son will do his duty to our house.”

Duty. His duty. Maegor always did what she told him to, he was a dutiful son, absolutely. But she never wanted to ask him of this. He was angry, more angry than she’d ever seen him, terrorising any sparring opponent with Dark Sister in his hands, a constant scowl on his face, a distant look in his eyes. When she tried to talk to him, he just nodded, not fully there, not listening. She was worried for her son. She’d never seen him like this. 

Maegor looked so much like her husband it was almost scary. While Aenys bore no resemblance to Aegon, taking completely after Rhaenys. Another reason Aegon would spoil him so much. She wondered if he ever felt regret in ignoring Maegor all these years. He clearly never showed any signs of it; did he perhaps think that it paid off in the end, since she raised him a fearsome warrior? There was so much to talk to him about, but so little time these days. All her hours were consumed by small council meetings, holding court and preparing for the wedding and the guests. Not to mention the unfinished Red Keep. 

Dinner was… tense. Ceryse looked around awkwardly, wishing to be anywhere but here. Her father and the King were making pleasant conversation, the Queen and her brother joining in at times, but her betrothed was completely silent. 

They barely had enough time to clean up from the long trip before they were summoned to dine with the royal family. The crown Prince Aenys was lovely, welcoming them to the capital, showing them around, introducing them to his wife and children. Ceryse could only hope that Maegor would have a sliver of his brother’s kindness. 

At first glance, he scared her. He was a giant, a look of anger and mistrust etched into his face. He was very handsome, she’d give him that, but he looked terrifying. From what she heard from the servants, he found great pleasure in violence, leaving all his opponents heavily injured, and as rumour had it, it only amped up when he found out of their betrothal. If that were true, and by the scowl on his face, it probably was, how the hell would they even talk? She was entering this with an open mind, but he made no effort to even meet her eyes. It gave her a little bit of peace to know she was not the only one forced into this, at the very least. 

Supper had flown by and she realised they had not spoken a word to each other, but the King insisted the two have a walk to get to know the other better. Was he truly the only one optimistic of this match? It would appear so. 

And now they were walking around the unfinished gardens, guards following but allowing them some privacy. It was so awkward it was painful. He was a silent man, lost in his own thoughts all evening.

“You know, it was news to me. Our betrothal.” she tried to break the ice. 

That caught his attention, as he turned to look at her briefly, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion. 

“Your uncle was the one who suggested it.” he stated simply, almost accusing her. 

“Yes, but he did not inform me, nor my father about it, not until it was final.” she explained. “So it was news to me.” 

“You do not wish for us to wed?” he asked after a few moments of silence. 

It caught Ceryse by surprise, how straight forward he was. But in truth, she did not wish for this. His family, albeit pleasant at first glance, still scared her. He scared her. 

“I do not mean to sound ungrateful, my prince, it is a great honour to be your betrothed, it was just extremely unexpected. That’s all.” she said, offering him a small, polite smile. 

Maegor nodded without a word. He seemed disappointed in her answer, almost like he wanted her to not want this. She thought for a moment. He was looking for an out. He didn’t want this either, clearly, but could not deny his father, just like she could not deny hers. If he thought just her refusal would be enough to end their betrothal, he was a fool. She’d seen women be dragged to the altar, crying and kicking, her word alone would not matter. As much as she wished it did, it could not save them. Her uncle drilled into her that their union would bring peace with the Targaryens and the faith, to prevent the disaster he foresaw coming. What could she say to that?

“I understand you do not want this, my prince.” she started, making Maegor almost stop in his tracks. “I understand, believe me, I do, but since it’s something we cannot escape, I would hope we could at least become friends one day.” she said, almost cursing her sudden surge of bravery. 

The way he looked down at her made her want to run for the hills. He had a harsh stare, his eyes only betraying anger. Had she truly offended him this much by pointing out the obvious? He surprised her when he sighed and looked away. 

“I can agree to that.” he said, continuing to walk. 

Ceryse didn’t learn much about him from that talk, rather from his brother, who was delighted to chat with her when he got the chance. He told her that Maegor was a knight, that his bravery in combat put all others to shame. Aenys spent the entirety of their afternoon tea singing praises of his brother, who wasn’t even there. His wife, Lady Alyssa, was a bit put off by her husband’s very generous description of Prince Maegor. She guessed they weren’t the closest of friends. She didn’t doubt his skill in combat at all, by the looks of him, he could crush a man’s skull with his bare hands alone. She’d hate to be the one to displease him. 

She was happy to see some familiar faces in court at the very least. Lana Tyrell was a close acquaintance, as was Rowan Evergreen. The three had always grouped together while their fathers chatted away about either business or the days of their youth. They were never truly close, but at least she wasn’t in a sea of complete strangers. Lana was more than happy to catch up and congratulate her on her upcoming nuptials, but Rowan was a bit difficult to find. Lana had told her she’d be leaving soon and was always like this when she had to leave, but she was still hoping to see her before she did.

She was glad that she had accepted her invitation to afternoon tea. Ceryse hated to admit it, but she felt nervous, sitting all alone in the gardens, so to see Rowan’s familiar smiling face was a relief. She got up and greeted her with an embrace, which the other woman returned.

“I’m happy to see you again! I must admit, I don’t recognise many people here.” she admitted while they had their tea.

“It can be jarring, I imagine. But you’ll get used to it. There are many friendly people in the capital, although nothing compares to Oldtown, you can grow to love it.” Rowan replied with a kind smile. 

“Must you truly be away for half the year? I’d find great comfort in knowing you and Lana are close by.” she didn’t say it was because her husband’s family frightened her, but she knew Rowan got the hint. Her eyes had a way of making her feel seen without having to talk.

“I find that I miss home too much to stay. I only accompany my father here. But worry not, Lana will be here. From what I heard, she’s invited some cousins as well. You’ll have plenty of company here, but I’ve no fear. You’ll meet many more.” 

Her words gave her comfort. Their houses had been closely tied for centuries. They had the same ideals, the same closeness to the faith and it kept them close. While the Tyrells were much more likely to go with the flow, she knew the Evergreens were much more like minded to her family. It was a good thing she could have someone that understood her, her repercussions, her worries about the Targaryens. She could see it in her eyes, Ceryse was sure of it.

Rowan was warm and welcoming, as she always remembered her to be, but something was weighing heavy on her mind. She wanted to ask, she wanted them to become closer friends, but it felt improper to do so. They simply didn’t know each other that well. And while Ceryse was comfortable enough to let things linger in the air that Rowan could understand the meaning of, the auburn haired woman in front of her seemed much more hesitant to reveal what was worrying her. Ceryse hoped in the future, she could help.

“I hope to see you again soon. I’ll be happy to see you when you return.” Ceryse offered a smile, which Rowan returned. 

Rowan had found a great excuse in their upcoming journey back to Starfall to avoid everyone and hide in her chambers under the guise of packing. In truth, she spent her days picking at her hands until the pain was numb or trying to smile normally in the mirror, for she felt like she would fall apart at any given moment. She found she couldn’t even look at him these days. She was afraid someone would see it in her eyes, all that was secret between them, and everything would be ruined. Her father was her rock, making sure she ate, that she had someone to talk to, or even say nothing to. Even the maids that cleaned her chambers were getting worried at the change of her behaviour. She felt suffocated. The idea of home was the only thing that kept her from falling apart.

She had managed to do a bit of packing, seeing as they’d be leaving in two days, it was about time anyway. She recognised the knocking on her door, and for the first time in her life, it filled her with dread. It was the Queen and judging by her expression, she was not happy to see her go. She always told her she’d miss her terribly when it was time for her to leave, but this time would be different. They both knew it.

“Rowan, my girl…” she said right after closing the door behind her.

“Your grace.” she greeted her with a small voice.

“I’m so sorry.” she said plainly and wrapped her arms around her.

Rowan couldn’t help but hide her face in Visenya’s neck, finding her warmth the most comforting, as she sighed, almost in relief. She always had her when she needed her mother, in many ways she had raised her as well. For ten years, half her year would be spent with her, she was the one who comforted her when her first blood came, she was the one she turned to for questions, for answers, for everything. It hurt her to leave, but she could not stay.

“I tried to change his mind, but he would not budge. I do not wish to see you go, or to see you two grow apart.” she admitted. “But I understand.” she added, her voice uncharacteristically soft.

“It could not be helped, your Grace, I understand. I will miss you terribly.” she said.

How ironic it was, that the King’s voice was above all, even his Queen’s? Even if Visenya had done most of the work? How terribly unfair things were. Rowan didn’t blame her. It was her husband and her son, their best interests would always take priority. And she simply wouldn’t offer much benefit as his current betrothed would.

But part of her still dreamed, still hoped that this was a bad dream and she’d simply wake in his arms and it would all be alright. How silly. She felt like a little kid, hiding in her mother’s arms, to hide from the pain, as if anything would make it go away.

“Will you return as normal? Shall I expect you with your father the next time he is called?” Visenya’s voice was almost afraid, afraid to lose her completely.

“In truth… I do not know.” Rowan admitted. And in truth, she didn’t know when she’d ever be ready to see him as a married man. She wasn’t even sure how she’d attend his wedding, let alone watch him from afar as she crumbled. “But I do hope so.” she added. 

That seemed to assure Visenya enough to pull away from the hug, but still holding onto her. She’d never seen her this remorseful before. She found comfort that she and Maegor were not alone in their pain. She hated that they had to part like this.

“This time, I will see you soon, in Oldtown. I only wish the occasion would be different.” 

“It’s no use to dwell on the what ifs, my Queen. I’m sure it shall pass with time.” she said, as if she wasn’t drowning since she’d heard the news.

Visenya was not convinced, but gave her a small smile anyway.

“I would’ve been overjoyed to call you my gooddaughter, I hope you know this.” she admitted, her eyes betraying such sadness.

Rowan felt tears reaching her own eyes as she nodded. It was an honour, truly, to have the Queen herself say this. It felt like something that would tie them together for eternity, the mother she found with the daughter she never had. She bit the inside of her lip, trying to prevent the tears from spilling, but to no avail. Visenya was quick to embrace her again, to rub her back while she cried, mourning in her own way.

He shouldn’t be doing this, it was dangerous and foolish, but she was leaving in the morrow and Maegor would be damned if he let her leave without seeing her again. He knew this was their last time seeing each other before his wedding- how he hated that word now. The next time they’d see each other, it would all be different, way too different.

She wasn’t surprised to see him, only a bit startled as he didn’t knock. They stood in heavy silence again, before he wrapped his arms around her small frame, holding her close. He never wanted to let her go, and it seemed she didn’t want him to. Rowan had packed all of her belongings this time. She’d always leave some things behind, for when she’d return, but this time, she left nothing. It shattered him, how final, how real it was becoming.

This was goodbye.

She had pulled back, and he took a good look around.

“You’re taking everything this time?” he forced himself to ask.

“Yes. I… I do not know when I will return. It may take longer.” she whispered.

“So this is it? We can never be as we were before?” he asked her, frowning deeply.

“You know we can not.”

“So I’m losing you forever, like this?” he already knew the answer.

“I know, I hate how things have turned out too. But Maegor, I still only wish for you to be happy, even if that’s not with me. I know it hurts, but I don’t want you to stop yourself from being happy with her.” she said, her voice trembling.

“You’re a fool. A complete fool, if you think I could ever be happy with anyone else but you.”

“It hurts Maegor, it hurts me more than anything, but we cannot do anything about this! So please, at least try.”

It filled him with fury, how powerless he felt. A sick part of him wanted them to be caught in a position so compromising, so his father would have no choice but to wed them, but he’d never defile her honour, never. Nevermind the political nightmare he’d cause.

“And you? Will you search for a husband now?” he asked, his voice dripping with jealousy that he did nothing to hide.

“No. Not until I have to.” she shook her head, almost offended he even had to ask.

All that existed in his mind was this hypothetical man, and all the ways he’d torture and kill him for even daring to look at her. For even daring to touch her. He’d fall into a complete rage at the mere thought, knowing that one day it would be too real. That he’d never call her his wife, he’d never have the chance to claim her, but some other would. Some lesser man, from a much lesser house, would get to call his Rowan his wife. He feared what he’d do that day. There was nothing in his mind stopping him from taking Dark Sister and cutting the man in half. The man that didn’t even exist yet. Gods, he was going mad already.

“I cannot bear the thought of anyone else having you-”

“And you think I can?” her voice was still soft, but held so much pain.

He knew he had no room to talk. He was the one getting married in a fortnight. He was the one being dragged down the altar, he was the one that would be claimed by another, not Rowan. Once again, he pulled her close, letting the smell of jasmine in her hair consume him entirely. She felt so delicate in his arms, so small. He wished to drown in her embrace, how in the seven hells was he to ever hold another?

Maegor pulled back enough to look at her face. Her cheeks were still stained with tears, he let his thumb wipe them away softly. Her eyes stared into his own as he held her. He couldn’t even think before leaning down to capture her lips into his own, but her hand pushed him away. He looked down at her, his eyes desperate and hungry.

“Please… kiss me one last time.” he whispered.

Rowan shook her head.

“Because if you kiss me, I’ll be stuck here forever. I’m sorry…” she frowned.

He could see that she wanted to, she wished nothing more than to kiss him, to hold him close, to have him. But she was always much better at being proper than he ever was. This was it. This was goodbye. 

He shook his head and pulled her to his chest again.

To let her go felt like a sin.

But he had to.

taglist:@heartstalked@stupidocupido@discowizard88@slytherisstuff

[isawken]

so the thing is

the thing is i think about my sorry 20 year old ass taking dozens of mgs of stolen barbiturates in my one bedroom apartment luxuriously paid for by an excess of student loans playing spyro the dragon on my 11 year old playstation 2 slim living the young artist's dream just me and a cat and and memory loss skipping class to make mediocre art too high to self harm in the old fashioned "burn or cut myself" way so i didn't think the other stuff i was doing was all that bad and trying really hard to be a mediocre waitress at a mediocre faux-high-brow restaurant and finally after a month being honest with my therapist and her recommending, not telling, me to self admit to Forest View Psychiatric Hospital and i actually did because i didn't know what else to do and i got in there and they took my shoelaces and i cried for about 36 hours straight because what the fuck did i just do, until they finally gave up on the trazadone that just straight up was not working and gave me seroquel and i finally slept for a while and then just sat in the bedroom i shared with an 18 year old anorexic (who would soon ask to get transferred to the minor ward and they'd let her for reasons i'm still not clear on other than the assumption of empathy on the part of her assigned psychiatrist which is frankly hard for me to believe) because they didn't actually care if you went to the group therapies as long as you were somewhere visible for their regular 15 minute check ins but after the 3rd day of now-intermittent crying and 6 new medications and mediocre forced sleep i asked if i could take a nap in one of the quiet rooms and they let me and it was one of the best naps i ever had in my life and when i woke up i was in a great mood and my whole perspective had somehow shifted and suddenly this was a good thing i was okay with being here (i still have no idea how this happened) and i went to group therapy and i tolerated the others in therapy telling me the solution to my immense self hate was to trust that god loves me and i went to the art room and drew in coloring books with the others and chatted and a 19 year old taught me about the chemical compounds in mucinex that get you high and i got a new roommate who was also my age also bisexual and she was an opera singer and she knew danish and we chatted up a stereotypically intimidating-looking biker man who had a voice as beautiful as my roommate's and he told us as he was waiting for the single-shower room about the benefits of MDMA for trauma and how the best thing you can do when you're rolling is "the airplane" and a 48 year old pill popper mother of 4 taught me how to jam a plastic spoon into the shower button in your room so you don't have to keep pressing the button for water and a guy named zander told me a bunch of pun jokes and we started sitting together at lunch and one day it was chicken wings, like actually decent chicken wings, so he ate a bunch and then left the bones piled on his plate as he left to get another round and the woman sitting across from us leaned over, eyes honed on my face, and very gently asked if it would be okay if we could cover up the bones on our plates because it reminded her of her captivity by two men and subsequent torture, specifically when they shoved a broken handle through her foot and

and

and my reaction was, of course, to say yes yes, of course, it's no trouble at all, zander won't mind either, and he came back as we were talking, and i simply told him let's cover up our bones as i unfolded a napkin and draped it over his plate, and he nodded in immediate understanding, and i switched conversation topics to something light like oh where are you from what did you do before this what drugs did you take and it was an otherwise fine lunch as we all commiserated over our substance abuses and

and

and ever since then, even during subsequent life-changing mental breakdowns, it's never been as bad as that first one, because i think of her (i can't remember her name i wish i did she deserves me to remember her name) and i am grateful that i can look at a pile of chicken bones and be okay

as far as psych ward experiences go mine was pretty much as positive as one could get and i'm so lucky and i'm so grateful but

it wasn't until way after my experience that i learned that other psych wards gave their patients fun grippy socks.

i never got grippy socks. and even worse than that.

i never got my fucking shoelaces back.