#also i love how confident she is! just so totally self assured and happy and looking forward to loads of things

[toomiieimagiines]

hihihi

uhm so am i allowed to request again (i don’t wanna spam) 😭😭🙏

and if i am can u pls do a rui x hopeless romantic best friend reader (i’m totally normal about best friends to lovers lmfao)

so like the reader is always yapping about hot guys and it’s a little angsty at first because rui is thinking to himself ‘why did i have to fall inlove with someone that won’t ever choose me’ and then one day a hot guy comes up to reader and asks her out, reader is about to say yes but then she realises that she barely knew him and there was someone (rui) who had been by her side since day one and she figures out who she really loves (RUIII) so she rejects him and when rui asks why she just hugs him and says ‘because your the one i really want’ mwah mwah i feel like such a genius (i really hope this made sense lmao be prepared for a million bestie-> lovers and angst-> fluff rui requests 😼)

thank youyoyoyoyoyuuu!!

hi guys! i’m so so incredibly sorry for how inactive i have been! unfortunately, the fanfic writer curse caught up to me, and i’ve had considerably bad things happen to me! ToT

i had developed a really bad addiction after a recent episode - which may be why i’ve loved to write my characters so miserable, but they get a happy ending in the end - and have recently relapsed after a couple months. i’ve also been struggling with a lot of things, like being bullied again, pressure from theater, classes, autism, parental issues, memory of past trauma, having no friends, things like that. i’ve just been having a really hard time, so writing has been super difficult for me. i’m currently having some of the worst mental health in my life, and am un-recovering from other things i’ve had in the past too, after seeing the results of my recovery. sorry if this triggered anybody, i just needed to get this off my chest, and felt also that i should explain where i have been. you all supporting me has kept me going, and i hope you enjoy this one too! LETS END THE PITY PARTY!!!

in other - not so depressing news - here you guys go!! sorry for OOCness, obviously this is a more dramatic approach to a story! happy ending, j tried to write the inner narration differently for how you two were feeling at the time.. and ty once again for such a great idea, mama ^3^

“I don’t think I could stand to be where you don’t see me.”

If he has to sit here and listen to this one more time, he thinks he’ll go insane.

Rui Kamishiro loves you. He truly does. You’re his best friend, his partner in crime, his-

Never mind.

Rui loves you, but he absolutely HATES your taste in guys, and it’s driving him nuts. Nodding and agreeing can only get him so far before he wants to rip his own hair out, and tonight is no exception.

“I give up! All boys are dumb, I don’t need them!” You lament, resting your chin in your hands. It’s the same song and dance over and over. You swear off boys, you get attention, you get sucked in, and he has to pick up the pieces when it inevitably fails. How many times has he thought about how much better he would treat you now? He doesn’t know. He’d be a classical lover, he’d never speak to you the way those stupid unprincipled high school boys do.

Gross. That’s his best friend, why’d he think that? And when did he start being so self confident? He really outta look at himself in the mirror. What an egomaniac he’s turning out to be.

He shakes his head.

“You do know I’m still a boy, right?” He prods, trying to cheer you up. He knows this situation well, and he knows exactly how to make you feel better. Again he’d pull you out of this, and again he’d watch you fall in love.

He wishes you could be happy. He wishes you weren’t in love with being in love. You’re too pure for true love, love is disgusting, depraved, and unkind. You’re not anything like that.

“I know, I know, but you’re the only good one!” You point, words self-assured. “I don’t need a boyfriend, you do everything boyfriendy for me anyway!”

Ouch. Thanks a lot, that’s exactly what he needed to hear right now. He’s not gonna dwell on that last bit for now, he’ll wait until he’s home. Then he can- he doesn’t know. Cry, or something juvenile like that.

“So I’m back-up-boyfriend?” He masks himself in jest, smiling teasingly at you.

“Eh, maybe,” you snicker, “you’d definitely be cute if you weren’t my friend.”

He turns to his school work sharply, trying to mask his complete and utter despair. Ugh, why does he have to be so dramatic? His own personality makes his skin crawl with disgust and hatred, and that only makes him cringe more. He could think about how obnoxious he is all day. Maybe he should use that go home and cry pass early. He pretends to check the time, as if that isn’t all he’s been doing.

“It’s getting late, after this problem I should get going.” He mutters, scribbling some random numbers into his notebook. You yawn in response, being broken out of absentmindedly scrolling through your phone.

“Ugh, I wish you didn’t have to go!” You drape an arm over his torso, trying to hold him in. He smiles fondly, wrestling to get you off of him.

“I’d have to walk home in the dark then, do you want that?” He knows you’d never let him, and he sees it immediately.

Your face looks knowing, and you let him go right away. It amuses him at first, but quickly fills him with overwhelming pity. You’re so kindhearted it makes him sick. You shouldn’t worry about someone like him, it’s bad for your health.

“Would you like me to walk home with you?!” You shoot up, the idea of him not being safe running through your head. Maybe he should’ve kept his mouth shut. How emasculating! He’s not a helpless young girl! He’s just as manly as those boys who you long for, he’s not a puppy to be walked!

God, is jealously turning him into a bigot? He shakes his head once again, this time not just to clear his thoughts. He’s absolutely not letting you walk him home, it’d be mortifying. He takes your attention belly up, you should have a break. Maybe some time to yourself for a change? God, Rui, get a grip.

“I’m fine, I don’t want you out late by yourself either,” he assures, looking at you in haste.

“Ah. You have a point.”

“I always do.” He means more to that, and he wishes he could tell you. He wants you to see that even he knows what he’s talking about. He needs you to see him, just for once. Not as a best friend, or backup boyfriend, just as a regular one. As a lover who dances in the rain, or ties your shoes

He needs to stop. He shouldn’t think about you like that. It’s lecherous.

You two exchange goodbyes, giving him a long hug (much to his horror). He hates how feverish it is it hold you like this, it makes him feel guilty. His body gets hot, his cheeks flare up, his throat feels tight- it makes him feel like a pervert, even if his thoughts are the farthest thing from lewd.

He feels that everything he thinks about you is repulsive, though.

“Be safe”’s and “See you later”’s are passed between you two, and he walks down your front steps, now completely alone. His eyes scan the damp pavement, seeing the golden hues from the sky light the boring rock. That’s how he feels about you, he decides. You’re the sun, and he’s the pavement. He humors himself by thinking that your suitors are the clouds, stopping you from shining your light for him so he can grow weeds in the cracks of his soul. That’s what these feelings are. Weeds.

He wants to live life beautifully with you, he decides. He wants to tie your shoes, he wants to twirl you as you dance.

He wishes he could be the moon. Something of consequence- of importance, but he’s just the pavement. Not the earth, not the stars, not the clouds, or rain, he’s just a man made monster who destroys nature - you - and is walked over by people who do matter.

He should quit being this way, he grumbles, it doesn’t do anybody any good to be so flowery. He’s too girly- too weak. Maybe that’s why you don’t like him. If you’re willing to date anything that moves other than him, that must mean he’s on a completely new level, huh?

That’s what dreaming gets you, Rui. Crushed dreams and embarrassment.

He lets out a pitiful sigh, kicking a pebble with his shoe. He sees a worm in a lawn which reminds him of himself, he sees a couple shopping for a new game which reminds him of you, he sees a convenience store which reminds him that he’s hungry-

His life can be so mundane sometimes, what a drag.

He’s about to reach his front door, when he steps into a puddle. It feels like an appropriate representation of his life right now. A sense of disgraceful hilarity washes over him, and he begins to laugh. He laughs a while, he laughs as he takes his shoes off, he laughs as he peels his button up down, and he laughs as he lays in his bed. How dramatic he could be some times!

He falls asleep quickly. He has a dream about being on stage and forgetting his lines.

He wakes up with a thud, he fell out of bed. How embarrassing. He decides to check his phone.

Weirdo: RUII

Weirdo: wanna hang w me 2day?? u don’t have dance time right??

Weirdo: gonna kill you. WAKE UP

Me: I’m awake, sorry!

Weirdo: finally sleeping beauty

Weirdo: wanna get a snack? i’m simply starved…

Me: When?

Weirdo: an hr maybe…

Me: Okay :) I’ll tell you when I leave.

Weirdo: kay!!

He really doesn’t feel like being social today, but he’d never pass up an opportunity to see you. He’s an obscene degenerate when it comes to you, pouncing on your attention like a sick dog. It’s mortifyingly pathetic.

He gets dressed, throwing on a boring striped sweater. It’s getting colder outside recently, and he’s always ran cold anyway. His hands are shaky and nervous as he brushes his teeth, the anxiousness to see you making his body jittery. He considers breakfast, but quickly shuts the idea down. He doesn’t want to be stressed out - at least more than he already is - when he sees you. Twitchy hands lock his door, and he gets a few feet away before he double checks that he did, in fact, lock it. Pull yourself together, Rui! He screams at himself.

The walk is just as unexciting as he expected, albeit a bit chilly. He’s feeling thankful for the sweater. The breeze runs its hands through his hair, and he’s reminded that winter is coming. He always liked Autumn flowers the best, hibiscus flowers are pretty too, he supposes. It’s nice to have the warmth of the sun soothing his cold hands during summer, for sure.

He trips over a rock on the way, and his pants get wet on the knees. Khaki blends into an ugly brown, and he sighs. How unlucky, would anything go right for him today?

Turns out it will, you look really good today.

You great him at the door, practically buzzing with eagerness. It makes him smile, knowing that you do, in fact, want to see him. Or at least are acting like it. You’re a good friend to him, he’s lucky to have you.

“Rui!” You hug him as a greeting, wrapping your arms tightly around his waist. His heart soothes, eyes closing in relaxation. Problems feel obscure and distant when you two are like this, despite his reluctance last night. He can forget about corrupt feelings - or misguided love- and he can just be your best friend. Despite his apprehension to be cared for, he is flattered that you, at least, seem to like him.

“Hey.” He breaths you in, his voice soft. He hopes you don’t notice, it’s embarrassing.

“Hey!” You reply, pulling away. “Big things planned, Rui!”

“What big things?” He asks, amused. “Big things” for you were junk food and shopping.

“Big things! It’s a surprise!” You put your shoes on, and he can’t help but feel jealous as he watches your hands tie them dutifully. He sighs, stretching. He decides to make it a challenge to act normal the whole day. No weird thoughts are going to beguile his mind, he promises himself.

You lock your front door, twisting the knob to make sure that it did, in fact, lock. This fills him with a child-like sense of delight, maybe you two really were similar.

Nah, not possible. You’re too pure - too perfect. Ugh, Rui, no more stupid thoughts.

He watches you check the time, make a face at a nearby bird, and cover your cheeks with your hands. You suddenly perk up, wrapping your arms around him.

“Warm me up, will ya?” You scowl at the cool air, grip tightening. He gulps. It’s weird he reacts like this, considering you two have done things like this all the time. It’s normal, so why does he have to be such a creep? His arms wrap around yours, running his hands up and down to create heat.

“Should’ve worn a jacket,” he chides, “wouldn’t be cold, y’know?” His voice is so casual, like everything is totally fine. It is fine. Fine, fine, fine.

“Gotta look good. I’m on the hunt, obviously,” you joke. It isn’t funny to him, but he lets out a laugh.

“You’re hopeless.”

You two stop at a convenience store first, and you all but sprint to the drinks. He had this ritual down to a science. You grab two different color slushies, and he grabs whatever odd snack catches your collective stomachs eye today. Today the two of you decide to split a cookie, and walk to the counter. The cashier gives you a smirk, and he averts his eyes.

“This it?” The boy cocks his head, and you get the memo. You immediately jump on the opportunity.

“Mhm!” You wink, resting your chin in your hands while leaning against the counter. In all honestly, he wasn’t even that cute. At least, that’s what Rui kept telling himself.

“Don’t worry about it, than. I got you guys,” he waves you off. Score! You think, but he adds. “If I can get your number.” Rui feels like falling into the floor, how awkward! You just scribble it onto a stray receipt, winking.

“Thank you! You’re the sweetest!!” You singsong, skipping along with Rui following suite. You immediately burst into laughter, throwing a fake punch at Rui. “What a weirdo! Like I’d call him over what, 1000 yen?! I don’t even know him, yuck!”

So you did have some sense, he feels like letting out a sigh of relief. You hold your hands out.

“Which one do you want? I got your favorite!!” You look so proud, and he wants to laugh. His “favorite” isn’t actually his favorite, but he’d never tell you that.

The lie started one day in middle school, when the two of you suddenly had a weird craving for slushies. When you picked them out, you had gotten a red one and a blue one, and asked him what he wanted. While he really didn’t like red, he knew you liked blue, so he said red. Now for the past four years, you’ve always ended up getting him a red one, thinking it was his favorite. He’ll deal with it for you. Seeing your blue tongue stick out with brain freeze is better than any sugary drink anyway.

“Red, duh.” He scoffs playfully, taking a sip of it. The taste doesn’t really bother him all that much anymore. It reminds him of you.

You always let him divide the snacks, thinking he gives himself the bigger half. He never does, but he eats slower so you think he did. You skip along, enjoying it.

“Y’know, this isn’t bad. Wish they had the brownie, though. That never does us wrong.” God, don’t make him think of the ‘crack brownies’ - as you two call them. Those are great, and he likes them, so you never miss an opportunity to shove them down his throat.

“Don’t complain. Remember the egg roll incident?” He points, laughing at the memory. You two steer clear of that section now, having gotten sick.

“Ugh, I haven’t thought about that in a while! I’m never eating an egg roll again after that day! Ugh,” you gag.

Moments of silly memories like this make him feel like he’s known you forever. He can’t even remember a moment where he hasn’t loved you.

“Where’re we going now, commander?” He salutes, following the trail of sunshine you left behind.

“Where ever the wind blows us, kind sir!” You salute back, pushing him along. Your constant checks of your phone don’t go unnoticed by him, and he fights the urge to roll his eyes.

“Who’re you texting? Don’t tell me it’s that guy.” He tries to sound casual, knocking his shoulder against yours playfully.

“‘M not a total idiot, I’ll have you know!” You huff, holding your phone to your chest. “It’s just somebody we went to school with a while back, ‘m seeing if I can pull the moves.”

“Do I know him?”

“Dunno, never saw you two talking, so maybe not. He was in my english class, remember, the only class we didn’t have together?”

“Ah.”

You two walk in silence, except for when he yanks you back from the collar so you don’t walk into oncoming traffic, which amuses you greatly. You two soon arrive at the small mall, and he tails you as you run with excitement. You two browse everything, constantly pointing out cute plushies, or interesting keychains.

“Rui, look! Look!” You shake him, pointing to the back of somebody’s head inconspicuously. “Wait don’t yet- Okay, now! He’s turning around! That’s the guy! What a coincidence we see him here, right? Do you recognize him?”

Ha. Yeah, he knows this guy. He definitely knows him. He’s the one who would trip him during passing periods, he’s the one who left flowers on his desk. They make eye contact, and it’s like all of his growth left his body. He’s just the same freak from middle school, he’s still thirteen.

He shudders at the guys smirk, sensing that he definitely knows that Rui knows him. He jogs over to the two of you, and Rui already knows what’s about to happen, due to the lopsided smile on your face.

Damnit, this is the first time he doesn’t think he can act like it’s okay.

“Oh wow, what a coincidence! Must be fate we run into each other like this, ehe…” You giggle awkwardly, a dumb expression gracing your face. It’s painful seeing you that way for anybody other than him, and he looks away awkwardly.

“Must be.” He answers, swaggering closer towards you. Rui thanks whatever God above because - despite his current situation - at least this asshole didn’t go to highschool with you guys.

He looks down at his shoes, and tries to shuffle away, knowing this jackass is about to say something. He’s quickly stopped.

“Who’s this, huh? Feel like a recognize him from somewhere…” He trails off, smirking through his nose as he turns his attention to him. “Have we met before?”

“This is Kamishiro Rui, he’s my friend! He went to middle school with us, remember?” You happily answer for him.

Ha, friend? What happened to back-up boyfriend? He’s a little hurt, to be honest.

He feels bitter, it’s unbecoming- God, he doesn’t care. He should feel bad for getting so angry over it, it’s not like you belong to him. He’s such a freak, getting attached to you like this.

He starts to pick at his fingers, then he plays with a loose string on his sweater. You two continue to chat like nothings wrong, and he keeps thinking. It’s something he’s gotten good at recently.

He stops feeling bad about himself for a second- a split second where he resents you, and wishes his pain upon you. Wants you to know what it’s like to be so disgustingly, guiltily, revoltingly obsessed with someone. In this split second, he can’t even find it in himself to feel guilty about it, which is unlike him. He wishes you felt love like this, that you were as psychotic about it.

But this doesn’t last long, because he remembers that he loves you more than anything. He’s lucky to be your friend. You’re a great friend, you’re an amazing person, you’re the sun, the sun, the sun.

He’s the pavement, he has to remember.

“I’m- I’ll leave you to it, y’know? Fabric store.” He stutters, choking on his voice. You don’t even notice, waving him off.

You do, however, remember to press his shoulder, uttering an absentminded “Okay, Rui, bye,” and he remembers again how perfect you are for doing it subconsciously. He lets himself feel the touch, long after he’s walked away. He deserves it after the trouble he’s reliving.

When he makes it to the fabric store - which he really didn’t need anything from, Nene had gotten some the other day - he can’t help himself from wishing he could just go home. Malls were always overwhelming already, and now his saving grace has the attention of another man. He walks through aisles, but realizes that he now has to buy something.

‘Least he knows that social cue, he laughs bitterly, running his hands across his face in frustration. He’s so ridiculous.

Meanwhile, you were chatting up a storm. It was your first time talking in person since middle school, after all! You feel giddy for a while, but it cuts abruptly. You feel a strange sense of urgency, something’s missing.

Oh, your best friend.

But where had he gone? You’re sure he was just here. You smile apologetically at the cute boy, putting on your best performance.

“Oh, I better go get my friend now. I don’t like walking home when it’s late. Was nice seein’ you, let’s hang out soon, ‘kay?” You singsong, stepping closer. You want to give yourself a pat on the back, you’re so cute.

He rolls his eyes, and you’re hit with a wave of uneasiness. That noise he made sounds strangely dismissive, he’s not the kind of guy to be a jerk though, you must be hearing things-

“Leave ‘im. Between you and me, he was a total freak in middle school. Probably is now, too. Probably likes you or somethin’, total nutcase.” His voice sounds so casual, like it’s not the douchiest thing you’ve heard all day.

You let other men walk all over you, sure. You let them cheat on you, lie, whatever. But you’re not about to stand here and insult Rui. He’s the only untouched thing in your life - the only person who isn’t cruel. He’s so gangly and awkward, but in the best way. You could live a million times and not be able to deserve him, at least you think so. He’s so unusual, and that’s what you love most about him. Little things like not liking loud lights, or liking the red slushies the best, make your heart buzzy with familiarity. He’s the one constant in your life.

You’ve been awfully worried about him recently, though. His particularly (as you like to call it) has gone to the an extreme, and it’s been a battle getting him to eat real food. You’re not blind, you see the way he’s been spacing out, or tapping a little too much. You just thought he’d been overwhelmed. He worries you to death sometimes, but despite all of his own struggles, he always seems to not care about it, deciding to always be there for you instead. Ah, he’s just such an amazing guy - no, not guy, he’s not anything like those other boys you talk to. He’d never insult someone like that. He’s not just a guy, he’s like your person.

Yeah, he’s definitely your person.

Your heart sputters at the thought, and you feel something you’ve never really felt before - save for hugs between the two of you that lasted just a second too long, or words a little too romantic. The feeling makes your mind fuzzy, and your heart hurt terribly with something you could only place as homesickness.

Oh.

“I,” you begin, backing away. “Yeah, I’m sorry but I’ll really be going now-“

“What? C’mon I was just messing with you, even though having guy friend’s kinda weird.” He rolls his eyes.

“Yeah whatever, I’ll call you back,” you say dismissively.

You’re totally lying, you laugh, you’re not calling him back.

He didn’t seem to like that.

“Damn, can’t even joke around with you people. Whatever, weirdo, sorry I insulted your little boyfriend.” The change in tone amuses you.

Yeah, good riddance, pal.

You turn away, walking through the mall with pace. It takes a while, but you spot him watching a pet stores aquarium.

He’s a funny one.

You wave your hands, trying to get his attention. He swallows, knowing that it’s probably to ask him if it’s cool to walk home by himself. Emotions are stupid, and ironically, you both think that at the same time.

“Rui! Rui! Hey c’mon, let’s go home, yeah?” You smile, face feeling warm. It’s a different feeling from when you usually talk to him. He looks at you, a little shocked. He had assumed you were smiling wide because you set up a date, so he turns his head.

“Where is he, huh?” He looks away, back to the fish tank. You shift in place, was he mad at you? You’re a little irritated at the mention of the guy, though, and huff.

“Don’t worry about that. Seems like I only attract douchebags, so I decided to go.” You explain, poking his shoulder. “Hey,” you start, “let’s just walk home, I wanna talk to you about something.” The idea makes you feel dizzy, but you’ll have to illustrate your feelings one day.

You can leave out the “I think I’m in love with you” part, you think.

The two of you walk in an excruciating silence, staring down at the reflection of the setting sun in the puddles. His heart tightens, remembering his earlier comparison. Even now, you’re so perfect. Even if he’s frustrated with you - despite you turning down the guy in the end (he doesn’t know why, he wanted to ask) - even if he’s ready to scream, and cry, and ask you what it is he did for you to be so turned off by him, he still thinks you’re the most heavenly, divine person to ever grace his view. He wants to be where you see him, he wants to be in your orbit.

“You’re like the sun-“ He blurts out, immediately regretting it. He didn’t mean to say that, God, he’s so fucking stupid. He sees you stop walking, smiling that same stupid, dopey, lopsided smile that he’s always so jealous of-

Oh. It’s for him.

He chokes, stopping to meet you eye-to-eye. You look up at him too, laughing giddily.

“What does that mean?”

He sputters, stepping away. “N-no it’s nothing- It was stupid anyway so-“

“No, tell me!” You urge, laughing a little harder. “What if it was something bad, ‘nd you were making fun of me? That’s not nice, Rui!”

“I- Hey-“ His voice goes a touch higher, a defensive tone rising. “That’s not-“

“Then tell me.”

“It’s just,” he breaths, trying to word it in the least creepy way possible. How does convey the fact that he sees you as a divine presence, that he sees himself as a worthless creature compared to you, without sounding like he’s hopelessly possessed by love for you? “I just- you’re so amazing,” he starts, “I thought of this stupid thing the other day when I was walking home - you know how I am - and well, I just thought of you when the sun reflected off the pavement - since it rained, y’know? - and well, it just- Sorry, it was dumb-“ He rambles, covering his face in anguish.

Nobody’s ever put that much thought into you. Sure, you’ve received a few ‘You’re so gorgeous’’s, where you’ve had to wonder where they learnt such a “big word”, but never something as poetic as that. The usual Rui-ratic explanation endeared you to him even more. You look at him, the smile never leaving. He’s just… so Rui. His stupid striped sweater, his half up hair - that you’d begged him to grow out - his eyes, whatever. Everything about him you treasure, and little do you know he cherished you even that more intensely.

“I think you’re the moon, Rui. Or maybe the earth, since I take care of you, hah!” You snicker, stepping closer to him. He takes a step back in return, and you grab his hands to make him stay put. His heart throbs, and he almost goes crashing down.

“I.. I don’t-“

You yank his hands, making him look back up at you. “Hey, Rui, I,” you look at him assuringly, “I wanna say something, and you can’t laugh okay?”

He holds his breath, so do you.

Fuck it, just tell him.

“I think I’m in love with you, Rui.” You gaze at him, the words shooting out faster than you can second guess them.

“I don’t-“ He breaks away, his fists balling up. You messed up, you think, you really, really messed up. “I’m not- I’m not going to- You can’t just say that because you got rejected. I- It wouldn’t be nice to- You don’t love me-“

“Rui,” you beg, grabbing his arm again, “holding hands on the way to school, cuddling while doing homework, knowing everything about eachother, these aren’t-“ You breath, “I’ve wanted somebody to love me for so long, Rui, and I was so blind to the fact that I was loved. But the love that I felt for you, - that I feel for you - Rui, isn’t the kind where I can be- where I can just be so- so normal about those things!” You monologue, saying whatever’s on your mind. You’re the rambling one now.

“I found myself comparing you to these piece-of-garbage dude’s I’m always with, wishing I could just date somebody like you instead! But now I realize that it is you-“

His heart falls into his gut, and he breaks free from you again. His hands move to his face, covering his eyes. His voice is broken and cracky as he begins to cry. “That was- you-“ He pulls you into a desperate embrace, arms holding you like you’ll disappear. “You shouldn’t, you’re wrong.” He sobs, “I’m- the way I love you is- You don’t understand, the way I feel isn’t normal I- My love is disgusting, and horrible, and depraved-“ He shakes, you rub his back. “You are so perfect compared to me, I’d never be able to- I love you so much, more than friends are supposed to, more than anyone’s supposed to at our age-“

“Rui, hey Rui please don’t cry.” You beg, smoothing out the ridges in his sweater. “I don’t- I don’t agree with that, and I can scream that at you, but I’m sure you won’t believe me. You’re not disgusting for feeling emotions different, Rui that’s what I love about you.”

“Stop- stop saying my name like that. It’s too hard to-“

“Rui, I love you. You don’t need to accept it, but I love you. More than being in love, more than being loved-“

“I love you, too,” his voice cracks, “that’s why I’m so scared. I don’t want to ruin a friendship that’s all I have, if this is just- I’m scared I’d lose you in any way, and I can’t live in a world where you don’t see me. I won’t. It’s sounds horrible but-“ He stops as you pull away from the hug, and wipes his face hastily. You put your pinky out, and his stomach drops again.

“C’mon, just like when we were kids. Pinky promise that no matter what, we’ll always see each other. That way you don’t need to worry anymore, y’know? I never break my kissy pinky promises, ever.”

Just like when you two were little.

He locks his with yours, just like you taught him all those years ago. He remembers your shared handshake for theater, he remembers your shared handshake for testing, and he remembers the song you two had to duet for choir - when you have forced him into it for a year. He holds everything of you so dear to his heart, you endear everything about him to you as well.

“Promise?”

“Promise.”

“I see you.”

“I see you, too.”

You two kiss your hands, then bring them down, still interlinked. You stare at him, and he stares back at you. In a moment of profound sincerity, you lean forward, and kiss him. It’s slow and gentle, and you unlock your hands half way through to hold his face, which he mirrors. His heart settles for the first time. You see him. He’s your moon, your earth, you’re his sun, his stars.

He’s suddenly alarmed by a quick pushing off of him, gasping out a “Rui!”

“I-“ he pants, wiping his mouth. “Hm?”

“we’re in the middle of a park!”

[rowarn]

I’m so happy i found your blog ;___; your soft simon/konig are literally a breath of fresh air like the other anon said😍💕 you write them so well and so tender and caring, they’re literally dream men tbh😮‍💨💕 what are yiur thoughts on how they’d be w a reader whose inexperienced?? both when it comes to intimacy and love in general (im thinking of a feral and skittish cat 🐈‍⬛ who mistrusts every approach and touch and backs away 😭) i always read abiut these men when they’re w a reader who is very sure of her self/sexuality and confidently engages w them (and don’t get me wrong i love reading it regardless!) but what abour when reader has no clue how to act/what to do and is kinda ashamed about it bc she doesn’t want to let her partner down bc she still possesses the v card🥴

(im totally not projecting 😭🙊 btw it’s totally fine if you don’t want to answer this!! wouldn’t want to overwhelm or cross any limits!)

HI MY LOVE IM GLAD UR ENJOYING MY STUFF!!!

hmmm i think both simon and könig wouldn't actually rlly say anything about sex unless you brought it up.

simons very perceptive, he can tell that you're a little shy and skittish about anything too intimate so he keeps his touches pg and simply follows your lead. he lets you guide the pace and he won't bring up getting his dick wet unless you do first.

if he catches on that you may actually want to properly discuss it (even if u don't flat out say it, again he can tell if somethings on your mind <3) then he'll be SO patient and soft with you as he listens. if you're embarrassed or scared, he'll do his best to reassure you that he's not some bumbling idiot who doesn't know how to make it feel good. and he's also not the type to really care about the idea of virginity. doesn't matter to him; he'll guide you and teach you everything snd he'll be so careful and sweet with you, you don't need to worry. he's not great with words but he does his best to get his thoughts across to put you at ease!!

könig wont bring it up bc he's kind of nervous. his thoughts sort of race when he doesn't get a black and white answer so when he notices you're a little skittish about him touching you, he goes thru 400 different reasons why and doesn't want to ask and scare u off by thinking he's some sex obsessed maniac (he's a pro at catastrophizing!!!)

will not ever bring it up avtually, you definitely will have to sit him down and spell out your thoughts to him. he'll noticeable relax in relief when he realizes you're not scared of him you're just....embarrassed?

unlike simon, he is pretty good with words. he blunt and gets straight to the point. he'll tell you that he's...big....everywhere and that he knows how to prep you so it won't hurt and that he would be SO careful if u felt like you were ready. he also assures you that it's nothing to be embarrassed about. contrary to simon, he does understand that some people view their virginity as something special and that if u want he can make it a rlly romantic evening for u!! it's up to u!!! just tell him what u want and he will follow your lead without a single thought <3

overall, simon isn't rlly the type to just jump into bed unless he gets the idea that you CLEARLY want to have sex with him. he's had his fair share of bedmates and he will definitely be able to pick up on any flirting. if he thinks you might not want to have sex, he wont say anything. he's a grown man who doesn't need to get his dick wet (: he's got his hand (yum) <3

and könig is.....könig. he's just happy to be here <3

I HOPE I ANSWERED UR QUESTIONS!!!!!

[criticallyacclaimedstranger]

For the kiss ask, I will exercise some self control and ask for only one, even if I want to ask for like twenty 😅

For the pairing, I'm thinking Frankie and Bonnie (which oddly enough, the last time you did a prompt ask, I requested the same pair) and #27 "Kisses exchanged while one person sits on the other's lap". Please and thank you 😄

Thanks very much for the ask! Oh, Frankie and Bonnie, how I've missed them! I'm happy you decided to go with those two.

Pairing: Frankie x chubby!reader (aka Bonnie). For more of this pair, go to my Forever Starts With You masterlist.

Warnings: reader is self conscious in a swimsuit but everything is fine because Frankie is perfect, and then there's kissing.

Summary: You and Frankie go to a pool party.

Okay so that gif is not by a pool but whatever

You have no idea how Frankie got you to agree to this. This is literally your nightmare.

The sun is shining, the audio system is pumping out something upbeat, people are talking and laughing – and everyone is in swimwear, or something tiny and summery. And no one is fat, of course, no one except you.

One of Frankie’s military buddies invited the two of you to a pool party and it’s really not your scene, least of all because of your size. You fretted for weeks before the party, went to the most expensive lingerie store in town and bought a disgustingly expensive swimsuit that looks amazing on you – but you are still overweight. Your skin still turns lobster red in the sun. You spent even more money on a kaftan dress that you probably won’t wear again, and only then did Frankie realize that you were dreading the party.

”We don’t have to go,” he told you, but you shook your head.

”You want to go.”

Frankie loves the sun and summer. You don’t mind it but you burn easily and with your weight and body, everything is sweaty and slippery and uncomfortable in the summer. And to put your body on display like that.

”You don’t have to wear a swimsuit,” Frankie tried.

”Then everyone will know exactly how uncomfortable I am,” you pointed out. ”It’s a pool party, of course I have to wear a swimsuit!”

So here you are, in your expensive outfit, with sparkly sandals on your feet and a straw hat on your head, your flickering gaze hidden behind dark sunglasses.

”You look amazing,” Frankie assures you in a warm whisper at your ear. ”I’m proud as hell to have you by my side.”

His arm is around you, and you feel more confident as he kisses your cheek, before steering you to wards the host couple. You are introduced, your kaftan is admired, you’re handed drinks, you make small talk until the next guest arrives, and you can retire to the side. You wave at Benny, who’s in the pool with someone in a triangle bikini on his shoulders. She shrieks when he tosses her into the water.

”You wanna go swimming?” Frankie asks, but you shake your head.

”Absolutely not.” You sip the margarita, and make a little noise.

”Christ, this margarita is good.”

”Lemme have a taste.” Frankie’s holding a beer, but you hand him your drink, and he sips it, licking his lips as he hands it back to you.

”That thing’s deadly. Enough of those, and I’ll get you to not only come swimming with me, but also perform a whole musical, Bonnie.”

You scoff at the nickname his friends once gave you after a particularly wet night during which you performed Total Eclipse of the Heart.

”I learned my lesson that night,” you shudder. The hangover you suffered from the following day was epic and you have no wish to repeat it, ever.

You mingle, talking to people, getting another drink and some snacks. You relax as you realize what you already knew deep inside: nobody cares about your size and what you’re wearing, all everyone wants is to have a good time.

You stay later than expected, and when the sun has set and the pool area is lit up by string lights, you finally go swimming. The pool water is a little warmer than you prefer after a day of sunny weather, but that just makes it nicer to get out of the water, into the cooling night. You walk around the pool, heading for Frankie in a chaise lounge, and you smile widely when you see that he is ogling you, a new beer in hand. When you reach him, he reluctantly hands you a towel, like he doesn’t want you to cover up just yet.

”Good swim?” he asks you in a low voice that vibrates along the length of your spine. You have to lick your lips before you can answer.

”It was okay. The water was too warm.”

He makes a sympathetic grimace but says nothing more. Instead, you can see how he caresses the curves of your body with his eyes. You give him a little shove.

”Hey, stop eye-fucking me.”

”Never.”

He smirks at you, and you grin back.

”I don’t think this is the right place for that, baby.”

”Anywhere is the right place with you looking like that.”

You roll your eyes to let him know just what you think of him being so simple about a woman in a swimsuit. Frankie takes your hand and gives it a light tug.

”Come on, sit.” He pats his thighs with his other hand.

Normally, you would hesitate. Sitting on his lap, even in the privacy of your home, isn’t something you enjoy much, because of your weight. But you’ve had a great day, you’re crazy in love with him, and you’re buzzing from several margaritas over the course of the afternoon, so you yield. Sitting down, you carefully try to distribute your weight, but Frankie doesn’t care as he slips his arms around you, happily staring into your cleavage that is, conveniently enough, right in front of him.

”Perfect,” he sighs happily, and you have to giggle.

”You are such a man.”

”Totally am.” His finger traces a feathery line along your spine, making you shiver. ”And you don’t mind at all, do you?”

You have to admit that it boosts your self esteem to have him look at you like that.

”I mind that I’m sitting here all hot and pretty, and you haven’t kissed me once yet,” you tell him off, and Frankie laughs before leaning in to brush his lips against yours.

”You could have asked, querida.”

”I thought you were clever enough to understand what was expected of you,” you retort, your tongue flicking out at his lips.

”Clearly not...” His mouth closes over yours in a soft kiss before opening, moving a little, then closing again. You cup his cheek with one hand, the other losing itself in the curls at the nape of his neck. Frankie rests one hand on your wet thigh, innocent-looking enough, but his fingertips are digging a little into the soft flesh, reminding you of how he can grip you when his face is buries in the apex of your thighs. His other hand is on your lower back, making slow little circles on your wet skin as you kiss.

”Maybe it’s time we go home?” you suggest in a soft sigh against his lips. He smiles, and shakes his head.

”Not yet. I want to show you off a little longer. Okay?”

You smile back, cheeks feeling warm.

”Okay.”

[melonteee]

I saw your video about Nami few days ago.

And one thing I cant stop thinking about with Nami is her being so comfortable with showing her body to get money or get men to drop their guard around her.

We meet her when she was 18. So she was still very young but already so used of showing her body.

It made me worry for child Nami. When did she have to start relying on her body? When did stealing and running as fast as she could stopped being a reliable way for her to get the money and survive.

Atleast she seems happy with being seen as cute and beautiful. But I still worry what she had been through.

We do actually learn that is a habit Nami semi picked up from Bellemere, as she teases Genzo by 'seducing' him. And we also realise this is something Bellemere may have done due to being poor, so she used her own charms to get things when needed. It wasn't implied to be anything nsfw, just something to tease and fluster stupid men LMAO

I'm unsure the implication of Nami doing that unwillingly when she was younger, since I more saw it as Bellemere letting her girls know to have confidence and pride in themselves and their bodies. After all, Nami knows she's hot! She's not shy about herself, and she likes being sexy! I know this sounds strange, but considering the state of a lot of shonen women at the time of One Piece's release, this was genuinely something I loved - since a lot of women who KNOW they're hot get labelled as 'too vain' or 'bitchy'.

Usually egotistical women become villains, because how DARE they have pride in themselves! But Nami was a breath of fresh air in that department, and Bellemere raised them to be strong and have that kind of confidence.

I don't believe Nami being comfortable in showing off her body is meant to be written with negative connotations at all, but is a showing of just how self-assured she is. She also has plenty of other ways to trick and swindle people apart from using her body, and we're shown Nami is someone who will only do things that SHE'S in complete control of. Hence why she broke down when Arlong broke the deal, because that was the first time she totally lost control of a situation.

[twst-hanaya]

TWST Book 7 Chapter 5 Thoughts:

Spoilers under the cut, also I'm basically typing this out as I play so it's like a liveblog sort of.

Malenora is That Bitch

Sorry, ahem. Malenora is a QUEEN (technically a Princess but my point stands)

Absolutely loving her design aaaaahhhh! The horns! The headpiece! The DRIP!

Sorry, I'll try to stop simping.

You can see such an intense resemblance between Malenora and Malleus obviously in appearance but also personality.

They both breathe confidence and self assurance because they're so powerful, both are fairly temperamental, though Malenora seems to be more brash and lashes out with tantrums while Malleus - perhaps due to his father - tends to sulk more than he does explode with anger, though the lightning and bad weather happens with both of them.

Moving on, her relationship with Lilia is interesting. You definitely get the sense that he may have harbored romantic feelings for her when they were younger but at this point truly loves her as something even beyond that, and different.

I swear I nearly started crying in public when they were squabbling over Lilia taking the Egg and leaving Malenora to fight the Knight of Dawn and Lilia was like I can't love this baby for you, I've never loved anybody, I still need you, this baby needs you.

And Malenora fucking hits him with You love me. You love Levan - there simply isn't any way for you not to love our child when you love us so much.

Oh shit I'm crying just typing that.

Anyway

And you know it really hit me in that moment that Lilia's earlier comments about not liking weak things like children - it isn't true, not even then. To love something powerless and weak and fragile means risking your own heart. Just as easily as they could lose their life, you could break your own heart. Lilia has always been afraid.

And when he lost Malenora - someone who he loved, who was the strongest person he knew - died anyway, and left her Love in and Egg, he had to accept that being hurt wasn't something anyone could live without risking.

Moving on, the Knight of Dawn is still a mystery to me, but he doesn't actually seem evil. Apparently he's an orphan who owes a life debt to the previous King, and is in a relationship with the princess Reia. And of course he helped the entourage escape with the Egg - an act I think ultimately saved Silver's life and Lilia's own humanity, among the other obvious things.

Henrik also needs to fucking die what a goddamn bastard KILL HIM MALENORA (I know she doesn't make it but I think she should still get to kill this dude AT LEAST)

Silver losing his shit is kind of understandable after all this, I get it. It hurts me to see him blame himself for literally just being born though he did nothing wrong he was an ACTUAL BABY PLEASE THINK RATIONALLY. Literally if anyone else were out in that situation you know this doofus would be like yeah literally none of this was your fault of course you deserve to live and be happy. But shits not that easy I get it.

Also I actually laughed a little during that scene where Lilia finds baby Silver and he's like STOP CRYING BITCH YOU DONT HAVE THE RIGHT

Like dude I get you're mad at yourself and all but your still yelling at a literal baby please stop 😭

Oh bonus points, I ALSO cried when I found out Lilia's Unique Magic is literally called Farcry Cradle. Like. This man who insisted for literal centuries that he wasn't capable of warmth or love and that he didn't like weak things or children and his UM called FARCRY CRADLE.

全ては過ぎ去る日のようにどこへ向かうもの瞬きの間よ、遠くの揺りかごまで

Also Silver was BLONDE???

Also Malleus being like Aw Shit, What Do I Do With This Thing with baby Silver was great. Love that.

Also totally forgot to just say I'm a bit shook that Silver was actually frozen in time for 100+ years and not a descendent. Was genuinely not expecting that.

Also got me FUCKED UP with the acorn bracelet being a gift from child!Silver like how much more emotional damage am I going to have to endure exactly

NOOO BABY OF COURSE LILIA LOVES YOU

Sidenote child Sebek and Silver are adorable

Cackling at child Sebek having Zero Chill.

He'll yeah, Sebek Unique Magic! "Living Bolt" is very appropriate for him! Pimp slap that boy (Silver) awake!

Silver: Malleus and Lilia probably hate me.

Me, out loud: shut the fuck up. Stop letting your lizard brain control you!

Sebek: *proceeds to immediately deck him*

Good job Sebek!

Sebek is so baby honestly.

Sebek is so right, what a king. I really love how Sebek shows Silver that he's loved. Look at how strong you are - who gave you that strength (love?)

Also I'm always a sucker for that trope when a character who doesn't have any self confidence ends up accusing the people who love them of lying, and really their own self-denegration ends up hurting the very people they care about. How hurtful and insulting it is to have your own moral character and your heartfelt affection for a person be tossed aside in favor of propping up someone's self hatred.

When Silver was like they cant love me and Sebek really said don't you fucking disrespect me or Lilia-Sama like that again. Yeah.

Thankfully Silver regains some clarity and they move along shounen-style, very good.

Oh man the battles for this chapter were actually kind of a pain.

Also tbh I don't know how to feel about them using a recolored version if Silver's 2D rig for the Knight of Dawn. It looks off, personally.

Also in a separate post I made, I said Malleus was like an uncle in their quartet but this whole Book has made it fairly clear that he's more of an older brother. With how long it takes for fae to mature, especially long-lived ones like Dragons, it's clear that Malleus is more like a 16 year old whose parents suddenly busted out a new kid.

I'm tired Goodnight

[riley-coyotl]

Yesterday, Maple had a consult with an orthopedic surgeon in Chattanooga. It went very well! We were very happy with the vet hospital--their facility was excellent, and everyone we talked to there was kind, respectful, professional, and helpful. Maple, of course, was a very good girl and did wonderfully at the hospital! Ultimately I feel we received good news, and I left feeling encouraged and more confident in both medical management and surgical options for her hip dysplasia.

We mostly went there to discuss total hip replacement (THR) surgery for Maple. According to the surgeon, she is a good candidate for THR surgery, and it would be a reasonable choice for her, with the goal of eliminating pain and returning normal function to her hip(s) for the rest of her life. There is even a good chance she would regain function well enough and be pain free with only one hip being replaced.

We were also told that it is perfectly reasonable to wait and possibly get the surgery done in the future if we want to continue to try medical management first for now; the surgeon assured us that Maple’s age is not a factor that should prevent her from getting this surgery, not now nor when she is older. As he put it, “[dogs] don’t come with an expiration date.” He regularly does THR on older dogs and told us there is no reason that they cannot get and benefit from the surgery; just the other week he performed a THR on a giant schnauzer who was around Maple’s age, as well as another dog recently who was 14 years old. With Maple turning 12 later this year, it was a big relief to hear that there isn’t this big looming time limit on her being able to be helped with surgery.

(The surgeon did not particularly recommend FHO surgery for Maple, which is already in-line with how we felt about it, which is that it’s not the right choice for her case.)

That said, we also talked about medical management. In the surgeon’s opinion, at Maple’s current age and progression of arthritis in her hips, there is no reason for us to limit her activities at all—he does not think that she will really be able to do further damage/make her arthritis any worse than it already is. In his opinion, we should let Maple choose how she wants to limit herself and how much she wants to do. I am a little skeptical on that simply because Maple is a high drive dog who has a tendency to push through pain...however I feel like I can try to make informed judgment calls based on her pain levels (especially now that I know her issue is there,) and continue to do what I’ve always done throughout her life—be her sense of self-preservation for her. I am going to try to compromise with Maple—she can do what she wants as long as I don't see her struggling with pain. If she is noticeably having a hard time, she's gotta stop, and at least take a break.

So, especially since there is no reason we cannot choose surgery for her in the future if we decide that's best, our plan for now is to see if medical management (pain meds + supplements + physical therapy) can help Maple be pain-free and mobile enough to have good quality of life and continue to do the things she loves. We’re gonna see how it goes. I already see some improvement since starting her on gabapentin and omega 3s, and hopefully that trend continues. I hope she will be ok and continue to be able to be Maple to the fullest capacity. 🧡

[greydaysandstarrynights]

Do you have any headcanons about Phoebus in the Descendants universe?

// My first thought is he probably disagreed with the decision to imprison all the villains on the Isle, except the dangerous ones. Once he found out they had children, and that the children were also stuck there, he sought an audience with the king in an effort to persuade him to release the kids. Probably definitely said something to the effect of, “punishing children for their parents crimes’ is something a villain does. Not a hero.” Everybody is horrified that Frollo has a kid, but Phoebus (and Esmeralda and Quasi) are even more so, because they know Frollo more deeply, Phoebus from working with him and being taken into his confidence. Frankly, he would doubt that Frollo is her biological dad, given everything he knows about the man. He loves Zephyr, but probably has trouble not accidentally going into soldier/captain of the guard mode. He isn’t abusive at all, and it’s not like he expects Zephyr to never misbehave, but Phoebus is perfectly happy to follow orders that are good and that make sense, so when Zephyr goes through his teenage rebellious phase, they probably clash a lot. In earlier stages where Phoebus asked him to do something perfectly reasonable and Zephyr refused for refusal’s sake, he probably left the room to calm down/think of a better way of approaching the situation,, precisely because he doesn’t want to risk damaging their relationship by going into, “I’m your father, and you’ll do as I say just because,” mode. In Phoebus’ mind, though, he’s making perfectly reasonable requests, and Zephyr is being ridiculous.

On the other hand. Claudine’s total, unquestioned compliance gives him the creeps, partly because he knows she does it out of fear and not realizing she can say no, and partly because, being a soldier, he knows how easy she’d be to take advantage of*, even in harmless ways—like when he asked her to tidy up the kitchen and came back to find her deep cleaning it, because she didn’t know the difference, and he didn’t realize she wouldn’t ask for clarification. (Because Frollo just assumed she was pretending to misunderstand on purpose to get out of her chores, and that never ended well.)

it’s Phoebus who actually sits her down and explains that most people don’t expect military like, robotic obedience from those around them, 24/7/365–and if she meets someone who does, she should run. Most people expect some degree of pushback, from their children or their colleagues or their friends, and while they might find it frustrating, they understand why it’s happening, and while they might wish it happened less often, they don’t actually want mindless robots, even if sometimes—especially with toddlers and teenagers, he tells her— they think they do.

He explains about how to weigh up any requests she’s given and decide if she really wants to do them or not, and assures her that she’s allowed to say no, and allowed to say she doesn’t want to, even if she might end up actually having to do the thing, and that no one will react to her doing those things the way her father did. They might get a bit impatient or shouty, if they’re stressed, and don’t see the request as a big deal, but they won’t hurt her.

Phoebus is actually the first person Claudine says ‘no’ to, after she’s been with them a while. They’re weeding the garden, and he asked her to throw some of the flowering weeds into the rubbish pile, and she looked right at him and said no. They were both pretty shocked—and, luckily, Phoebus had gotten good at helping her calm down when she started panicking, thanks to all his dealings with soldiers who had PTSD—and eventually she managed to tell him that she collected “weeds,” especially the flowering ones like dandelions, and kept them dried and pressed in an old book. He of course agrees, and starts just giving them to her after that.

I really like your fanfic where he’s the one to discover she self harms, so I’m adopting that—except I guess in my headcanon, he’s the second person, since Quasi knows first, but Quasi doesn’t know what to do about it, whereas Phoebus—once he’s gotten over the shock, and assures her he isn’t angry at her, but her father—manages to explain why Frollo’s wrong about her self harm being proper penance.

That’s all I have for now!

*medieval soldiers wrecked havoc on the peasantry, even in their own countries, by living off the land and requisitioning food from the peasants. They also had reputations for violence against conquered civilians, particularly sexual assault.

[fairycosmos]

do you ever feel like people automatically think something is wrong with you when you have no interest in dating/being in a relationship? i was talking to my friend about how i haven't had a crush on someone in years and im fine with being single and she immediately started bringing up my childhood trauma (like "do you think because of what you went through with your parents you can't open yourself up to love?") and this was weeks ago but i can't stop thinking about it. i know she didn't mean harm by what she said but i hate the idea that being content with myself is synonymous with being traumatized, when ive always been this way. ive always prided myself in my self-assurance and independence so to hear a close friend basically say its a trauma response (which sure it might be but it's mostly just how im wired i think) seemed kind of weird to me. she said a similar thing later when i was talking about how im never really bothered by my physical appearance and she said something like "maybe that's because you never try to pursue people romantically" as if she expects my confidence in my appearance to dwindle as soon as i have a crush on someone, even though ive spent a lot of time working on building that confidence. idk it feels like projection to me

YESSS ppl act this way towards me all the time and it makes me want to bite my own hands off! my one friend is convinced i dont like dating bc of school trauma and parental trauma and self-esteem issues and it's like Ok? while all of those things are a genuine issue for me i also just. dont feel anything like that for anyone. my life does not revolve around dating prospects and i don't want it to. i've always said this but i feel like falling in love is actually a pretty rare thing and sooo many ppl are just together bc of timing or convenience or desperation, and yet we're still treated like the weirdos for not wanting to engage with that endless trial and error? when being single is perfectly comfortable anyway? i totally get why your friend saying that made you feel weird. it's like the concept of being happy while single is sooo foreign to them that they have to pathologise it which is just kind of crazy to think about really. they think theyre so right about it too, always so pitying and condescending it and it's like i don't know how to explain to you that im not pretending to not need anyone romantically to make myself feel better - i really, genuinely don't see dating as a necessity at this point and that's fine! i think you're right TBH part of it has to be projection with the way it gets ppl so fired up. like just because your self-esteem and happiness depends on whoever you're dating, doesn't mean everyone's does. srry. also that thing she said about your appearance was weird. it's really admirable that you've worked on being comfortable with yourself and i don't know why that effort would be reversed if you were to ever develop a crush? anyway yeah it will always annoy me that not dating isn't more normalised man! we’re just existing 

[silverbladexyz]

Hello!! I’m here for the match up event (btw congratulations on 100 followers, you definitely deserve it, i don’t know how you manage to write so much and so well😭😭💖💖)

-my personality type is INTJ, and i’m a 4w5 and my pronouns are she/her

-i get along with mostly everyone since i can easily adapt my personality to make myself appear interesting to them, but i don’t have many close friends since i over analyze everyone and i have a hard time trusting others. People usually assume that i’m distant or cold but they just don’t bother to get to know me, and i can actually be a totally different person if i trust someone fully, and i’m way more “energetic” or happy when i’m with those said close friends. Most people who know me consider me to be intelligent, but i doubt myself alot and i act confident even if i’m not feeling good about myself. I also tend to think of myself as selfish even for just telling someone about my interests. The things i don’t like: when i see someone getting used or taken advantage of despite them being kind or good people, misunderstandings, or people who don’t bother listening to the other persons side of the story, unfairness. Overall, i don’t think there are many things that i can’t tolerate but these things i just can’t stand.

some of my hobbies: -dancing -i’m not sure if this can be considered a hobby, but when someone has a problem in their life i like finding solutions to it (i’m not too good with comforting them though, sadly)- i also like working out (but often it’s just jump roping for hours if i have time) - and something i do daily is just take walks and think about whatever comes to my mind lol

-I’m caught up with the manga, and i read the light novels too, and you can decide if you want to give me a mentor or a sibling, i don’t mind :)

thank you for everything you write, and once again congratulations on 100 followers!!! <33

Hiii lumichiyy!!! Thank you, that's really assuring and sweet 🤧🤧I had a lot of fun writing your matchup, so enjoy~

The images are not mine. They belong to their original owners.

Calculating...

Your sibling figure is... CHUUYA NAKAHARA!!!

-Let me tell you, Chuuya is worthy of gaining your trust

-His loyalty knows no bounds to the ones that he cares for, and that includes you. Even if he is loud and brash sometimes, deep down he still loves you like a brother

-He doesn’t really mind that you over-analyse people and that you don’t trust too easily; he’s a bit glad really. Chuuya has a lot of enemies and the last thing he wants is for you to be manipulated by them. Just please don’t be cold to him or over-analyse him... he wouldn’t appreciate that

-He likes your energetic side; it’s like a breath of fresh air for him, and the fact that you were only like this with people whom you trusted makes him feel special. Chuuya also likes listening to you talk about anything, but please don’t bring up Dazai or anything related to his past

-Chuuya also likes how you act confident, however, when he learned about your insecurities, he was a bit surprised. He’ll try his best to comfort you if you’re feeling really insecure, and even if he isn’t the best with words, he cares for you and wishes that you can see yourself in a more positive light

-He also appreciates your intelligence and helpful nature. He can turn to you whenever he needs help, and you always manage to find a solution for him. It secretly hurts him when he sees you doubting yourself, but he’ll most likely say ‘Don’t give me that. Do you really think so lowly of yourself? What’s there to be insecure about anyways?’ He’s trying

-Chuuya also hates it when good people get manipulated or used. He lowkey worries for you, even when he knows that you could look after yourself. It still doesn’t stop him from teaching you self-defence and weapon handling though. When I say that he’s worried, he’s worried

-You two also rarely fight, because any misunderstanding is cleared up quickly, and also because Chuuya would listen to your side of the story as well. At the end of the day he is tired and moody most of the times, and he does appreciate how you don’t try to set him off

-Working out? When he hears this, Chuuya is immediately dragging you to the gym to work out with you. He’ll encourage you to try out all the different gym equipment, and he’ll even teach you how to use them, but he won’t push you to use them if you don’t want to

-Chuuya does admire how you could jump rope for hours. He could also do the same if he wanted, but I feel like he would sometimes get caught on the rope lol. And getting lashes from jump rope is not fun (speaking from personal experience ahaha)

-He doesn’t have a lot of free time due to his job, but on his free days he would also like taking walks with you. Now this could go two ways: you two engaging in conversation, or just walking in comfortable silence. Chuuya doesn’t really mind either way, because he likes spending quality time with you

-Is very protective of you. He tries to keep you safe most of the time, and eliminates any threats that are a danger to you. Chuuya also is not afraid to literally beat up anyone who physically or emotionally hurts you. He’s already lost a lot of people in his life, and he can’t lose you too :(

-But on a brighter note, Chuuya would absolutely take you flying with his ability. I feel like it would be on rare occasions like your birthday, and when he flies with you it’s a beautiful night time in Yokohama where the full moon is the prettiest. I’m so jealous lmao

-Also takes you on motorcycle rides! If you wanted, he could use his ability and go onto buildings and stuff. It’s hella fun, and it’s kind of a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity

-Overall, Chuuya is the most loyal and protective brother. He cares for you very very deeply

And last but not least, your mentor is... AUTHUR RIMBAUD!!!

-Okay okay, when I saw your mbti and enneagram I immediately was like ‘Omg Verlaine is also INTJ 4w5!’

-And Rimbaud has had enough experience with Verlaine to know how to mentor and interact with you. He was surprised when he became your mentor, but he gladly accepted the role

-He’s actually a pretty good teacher; efficient at teaching and never reprimands you. He always manages to keep you interested, and you always want to learn more from him

-Rimbaud would most likely teaching you infiltration, combat and negotiation. Being a spy is a really risky and dangerous job, and he definitely wants you to have the necessary skills needed for your missions

-He wouldn’t really mind your distant and cold personality at the start, since he has dealt with many people like this before. But your energetic and happy side was not something he was expecting, and he thinks it’s quite a pleasure to be trusted enough by you

-Insecurities? Rimbaud has them too. However, it doesn’t stop him from trying to help you with yours. I headcanon that Rimbaud may be a bit awkward trying to comfort you, but hey he’ll gladly do anything to make you feel better!

-Rimbaud is also a pretty fair teacher. He doesn’t want to overwork you or give you disadvantages. Even though he does push you to overcome your limits, he makes sure that it’s fair

-He also likes your intelligence and your willingness to solve problems. Rimbaud was confused when he saw you doubting yourself, because he himself thinks intelligence is a nice trait. Definitely tells you that he admires your smartness and that you should actually feel proud of it

-Rimbaud is constantly shivering and complaining about the cold... so on the birthday you gave him an extra warm pair of gloves and a new scarf. He was kind of awkward since he isn’t used to platonic affection, but he wears your presents all the time now <3

-He would teach you French if you asked him to. I bet he also knows a lot of other languages too, and he is equally fluent in them as well. The first word you learned in French was ‘cold’ because he kept saying ‘J’ai froid’ all the time lol

-After Rimbaud spends more time with you and becomes closer to you, it’s evident that he cares for you a lot. He may not express it verbally, but it’s in the little things that he does for you. Please give him hugs

-Remember when he wrote in his diary that ‘he would gladly walk through any hell for his partner’s sake?’ Well, there’s no doubt that he would do the same for you. Please don’t betray him, because he’s been through so much already :(

-Overall? Rimbaud is a calm and loyal mentor that hopes to see you succeed

Oof sorry that this turned kinda sad :(

@lumichiyy

[mirudders]

Gorgeous picture of Miranda in this week’s Woman’s Own, and a fun interview too. Full text under the cut:

Miranda: ‘I’m beautiful in a different way!’

Miranda Hart opens up to Woman’s Own about shocking her fans and being more confident now than she’s ever been 

Miranda Hart shot to fame in 2009 with the launch of the BBC sitcom Miranda. And with her character having the same name as her and described as ‘an unusually tall, clumsy, thirty-something woman, who frequently finds herself in bizarre situations’, you’d be forgiven for thinking the actress had been playing herself for five years.

But as Woman’s Own meets Miranda to talk about her latest role as Miss Bates in the film Emma - based on Jane Austen’s classic novel - the 47-year-old couldn’t be any further from her awkward alter ego. 

In fact, she’s much more self-assured than her (although she does find herself in bizarre situations in real life too!)

Here, Miranda opens up about getting more confident in herself with age and reveals that we could be seeing more Miranda in future...

Hi Miranda - once the series Miranda had finished, did you find it hard to break away from the character?

It was a character in a clown persona that I’d taken on so I needed a break from it, and it was time for me to say goodbye to her. I didn’t find it hard at first, but it’s harder now because it’s been five years and I really miss her. Whether I do more, I don’t know yet, but hopefully Miss Bates will lead to other roles - that would be delightful.

The costumes in Emma are incredible! What was it like to film in them?

All the costumes were amazing, but you become really aware of how uncomfortable women must have been then. I was like ‘Oh thank goodness, I live in a world where women can wear tracksuit bottoms and slouch,’ because I just couldn’t have coped.

Your character, Miss Bates, is incredibly upbeat - are you similar to her?

I actually probably prefer listening, rather than talking. I think in real life, I’m not shy, but I love to observe and sit back, and I find gossip really boring. But I think she’s definitely helped me continue on my journey of trying to be positive, despite everything. Hopefully, I’m also less annoying than Miss Bates, but I love her. 

Where’s the weirdest place you’ve been recognised?

There was a really funny incident when I was in a spa in Palm Springs. There were two women talking about an episode of Miranda where I was struggling to get into a swimming costume at a spa, but they hadn’t seen me standing there about to get into a Jacuzzi with them. So I just turned around and went, ‘Hello!’ and they screamed.

Did you know?

Miranda has two tattoos - Chinese letters on her arm, and a bird and love heart on her ankle. She’s admitted she regrets getting them done.

How confident are you?

I’d probably say very confident. Is that allowed? I suppose it’s the joy of getting older. You’re like, ‘Oh, I like myself, I am who I am, take me or leave me!’

Have you ever felt pressure to look a certain way?

I definitely felt when I was starting out, ‘Oh, I don’t fit a mould that I’m meant  to fit on television as a woman,’ but that was 25 years ago and things have really changed. We’re all beautiful and now I just feel lucky because, being tall, not the pretty button-nosed person, but beautiful in a different way, I get to play amazing characters like Miss Bates. That suits me and that’s who I am rather than the romantic lead, so I’m just happy with who I am.

What’s left on your bucket list?

So much! I want to learn to horse ride, kayak and do animal conservation. But I feel blessed to have a real, real appetite for life and I have the confidence to take risks and go for it. So I really hope that I can do more career-wise and personally, just for larks.

[todoscript]

how he would ask you out

request: pls some headcanons of how the boys (shinsou/tamaki/shouto) would ask the girl they like out 🥺

characters: shinsou hitoshi, amajiki tamaki, todoroki shouto

genre: fluff

word count: 3.3k+ total, 900-1200 per character

tags: pining, confessions, fem!reader

author’s notes: sorry if this sounds rushed?? i can’t write 

copyright 2021 todoscript, all rights reserved. i do not allow my creations to be published or translated anywhere else.

SHINSOU HITOSHI

two years after his enrollment into the hero course, shinsou had finally came to terms with the feelings he’s been holding for you for quite some time now.

what began as just friendly encounters and kind gestures felt like something more to him. after all, you were one of the key people that led him to transition smoothly into the class, with your helpful demeanor and coming to his aid whenever he was stressed and troubled by the new environment.

you went out of your way to organize study sessions and small arrangements to mingle and get to know the other students better.

you reiterated to him that if he ever had any questions about anything, he could always come to you.

initially, shinsou thought he was being a burden—that he was just heavy baggage that tied you down.

however, you assured he was anything but, and stated that you were more than happy to help him, even going to say you enjoyed spending time and getting to learn more about him.

at your response, shinsou was appalled at how genuine you were.

appalled… but also very grateful.

eventually, there came a point when he realized there was no mistaking the affection he felt for you—not when he subconsciously noted every one of your habits and intricacies, able to tell whatever emotions were running through you at a simple glance, or when he would stop to admire the way you decided to style your hair differently or changed your look, thinking you seemed even more charming that day by the confidence you exude.

no, at that point, he’s sure it was painfully obvious. so obvious, in fact, that kaminari and mina had chosen to skip today’s group study session in favor of letting the two of you have your “alone time”. whatever that could mean.

shinsou had grimaced over their excuse of “being too busy that day” when you had told him the reasoning they gave you over text, despite knowing their next exam was only a couple days away. recalling just how nosy and enthusiastic they could get when involved in these kinds of affairs, he had an inkling of what exactly those two were planning. you, on the other hand, seemed completely oblivious to their schemes.

however, what did latch onto your mind was the thought of spending the day with only shinsou, in his very room, sitting across from each other with your textbooks open in front of you. though you should be more attentive to your studies, you couldn’t help the palpitations beating loudly in your chest and your wandering eyes that snuck glances at him after every question you answered.

unbeknownst to you, shinsou mirrored your actions all the same, reciprocating the flustered behavior, albeit a bit more subtly.

keep calm, hitoshi. why are you getting all worked up? he would say to himself, putting on his usual facade.

although he came off as relatively calm and collected on the outside, it’s difficult to keep his emotions in check when actions never lie.

that was especially true as he reached his hand out for the eraser you two were sharing between each other. with his eyes continuing to gander down at his notes, he hadn’t noticed that you were lunging for the same thing—not until your fingers had suddenly touched and you both pulled away at a speed equivalent to making contact with fire.

his stare unfaltering, shinsou was surprised to discern the embarrassed look on your face that immediately fixed itself as you rummaged through your pencil pouch. a second later, you pulled out another eraser, one that was notably smaller than the one you were sharing.

“um.. i’ll just use this,” you offered, and shinsou rubbed the back of his neck, the whole situation more awkward than it needed to be considering you never had any trouble sharing your supplies with each other before.

through some examination of your demeanor, shinsou had made a… bold enough claim, thinking that maybe—just maybe—you held the same kind of affections for him as he did for you.

it’s like he recalled earlier—actions never lie—and shinsou didn’t let the quiver of your lips or the intense concentration at your work to avoid meeting his gaze go past his head. that’s what spurred him to finally act on his desires.

without warning, he leaned forward on his seat to lay his hand over yours that caught your attention. you met his eyes, astonished to say the least, but more so concerned by how your eyes widened before you were about to open your mouth to ask him what was wrong.

the violet-haired male beats you to your words, voice resonating firmly, “y/n.”

you blinked. “y-yeah..?”

“i know this might be a bit late coming from me, but,” you could feel his hand tighten atop yours, “after exams, do you want to catch a movie together? just the two of us?”

shinsou fought the urge to look away, bashful at how he made his declaration for your time. the warmth surging under his skin was alleviated at the smile that slowly curled on your lips as you rotate your wrist, your palm touching his. the expression washing over your features told him you’ve been waiting for him to ask you this for a while now.

“i’d love to.”

AMAJIKI TAMAKI

ever a shy and introverted individual, tamaki has never had the heart to ask you out despite years of harboring a crush on you.

every time the thought had crossed his mind, he’d reason poorly with himself that you wouldn’t be interested in him in that way.

it didn’t help that his low self-esteem only deepened that thought that had now rooted itself in his brain.

at such a prestigious school like u.a., you were bound to find someone far more compelling than him—someone with guts, confidence, and great social skills. not a guy like him who conjures the image of potatoes at every anxiety-inducing encounter he comes across.

he was relieved enough to settle himself comfortably as just your friend—a title that allowed him to stay close and keep within your circle, all the while subjecting him to simply admiring you from afar.

but his eyes that held a hidden longing for more weren’t overlooked by a fellow student of his. or to be precise, the ever curious and free-spirited, hadou nejire.

always aware of his surroundings, it was hard not to notice that peculiar stare she’d aim at him during moments where he might’ve just finished speaking to you, or when you’d pass by and his head would naturally drift in your direction.

it was like she was picking apart every detail laid on him and it made tamaki absolutely restless.

tamaki’s suspicions and anxiety were later raised during one instance at the lunch table. he was at his usual seat next to his other big three companions, mirio and the aforementioned nejire, who was eyeing him with a gleam in her eye.

even with his self-consciousness, tamaki did his best not to pay any mind to the undesired attention and munched on his plate of takoyaki—the octopus nestled in the batter sure to come in handy later in training that day.

to his dismay, you passed by their table with your tray of food in hand, and nejire did not waste any time calling you over in that cheery tone of hers.

she invited you to sit down with them. you gave her invitation some thought before ultimately placing yourself in the free spot next to mirio, with nejire and tamaki already seated across from you.

the girl was all smiles and hums while tamaki was in a state of distress, both at his friend’s odd behavior, which was starting to spell trouble, to having you pulled into all of this. mirio was just being mirio, welcoming as always.

you greeted everyone at the table, making eye contact with mirio and nejire, but tamaki evaded your line of sight. he simply waved his reply without breaking away from his balls of takoyaki.

luckily for him, you didn’t give his lack of words much thought and started digging into your own lunch. it was then that nejire found it appropriate to start up a conversation.

“y’know, y/n, i’ve been meaning to ask you this, from one girl to another,” she mused, finger waving around playfully, “are you interested in anyone here?”

upon hearing her question, tamaki almost choked on his bonito flakes, his cheeks puffed and eyes blown. meanwhile, your chewing slowed as you gave your answer some thought.

“uh… well–”

“i’d say fujita from class d is quite the looker! think you’d be interested in them?”

after swallowing the food in his mouth, tamaki began to subconsciously listen in on the conversation. he paid close attention to your responses with bated breath, a small part of him anticipating your answer highly.

“fujita’s nice and all, but i don’t think we’d really get along as a couple.”

tamaki mentally sighed, relief evident all over his face. it was then that mirio had started fitting the pieces together after watching his close friend’s brow wrinkle throughout the entire exchange before finally relaxing at your words. crossing his eyes with nejire’s only confirmed his suspicions as the girl sent him a wink.

as a friend, mirio wasn’t about to let nejire’s operations fall flat. getting up from his seat, he motioned tamaki to come with him.

“i heard they have extra yakisoba bread right now! we should go check it out!” he said as a guise to give the other two time to themselves, free from tamaki’s prying ears.

unaware that mirio had caught on so quickly, tamaki didn’t object to tagging along with him. mostly because he thought of this as an opportunity to get some fresh air and calm his racing heart, finally feeling the effects of the blood rushing to his face.

with tamaki supposedly out of earshot, nejire was free to go about her questions however she wanted.

“okay then, if not fujita, then who? there has to be someone, right?” the girl scooted further in her seat out of pure curiosity. “tell me, is it perhaps someone in our class?”

it was your turn to be stricken by her boldness. you tried picking at your food, stuffing it into your mouth to avoid answering, but nejire’s tenacity outmatched you.

finishing your lunch, you opened your mouth to speak, “actually, the person i’m interested in is pretty close to you…”

nejire feigned ignorance, innocently placing a finger under her chin. “who? mirio?”

“ah no, it’s tamaki, alright?!” you ended up blurting, voice hushed but frantic.

bingo. hearing exactly what she wanted, nejire returned to her original position, a triumphant grin plastered on her lips. replaying what you said out loud in your head, you buried your warm face in your hands.

unbeknownst to you, tamaki had ended up hearing the whole exchange around the corner coming back to their table as mirio lightly snickered at his revelation of an expression.

the blond patted his shoulder. “go on then, you know what to do.” he threw tamaki an encouraging thumbs-up.

the boy gulped in response before inhaling a deep breath of air to prepare himself for what would arguably be the most important yet stress-inducing moment of his life so far.

noticing you getting up to discard your tray, tamaki—through a final push from mirio—went to make his move.

hearing him suddenly call out to you, you were caught off-guard. after admitting to your crush on tamaki to nejire, you felt your cheeks get hot just seeing his face right afterward.

“oh hey, did you get your hands on those yakisoba breads?” you scraped up a way to start the conversation.

“right... that… mirio managed to get the last one in the cafeteria,” he answered. then he brought his hand to rub his elbow, fidgeting in his spot as he found it difficult to look you in the eyes again.

“tamaki? something wrong? are you upset that he got the last yakisoba bread?”

he shook his head. “no, i… it’s just… i’ve been meaning to ask you this for a long time now, but never had the courage to say it to you because i didn’t think you ever liked me that way. but…” he finally mustered the determination to face you head-on. “would you go out with me, y/n?”

at first, you were speechless—absent of words as you relayed his request in your mind over and over again. then, your eyes softened, lips easing into a smile as you reached out for his hand.

“i thought you’d never ask.”

TODOROKI SHOUTO

it’s no surprise to many that when it came to asking someone out, todoroki didn’t exactly know the first thing to do.

mostly because he’s never asked anyone out to begin with.

you were the first person he’s ever felt these kinds of emotions for, and to be frank, he wasn’t sure what to make of everything that had been going through him when that root of infatuation had started to bloom inside him.

rather than sulk or contemplate on his thoughts for too long, he surmised it was best to simply come clean and ask for advice.

but when he confessed to what had been on his mind lately, he wasn’t expecting such a vigorous response from his friends.

“i’ve been thinking about asking y/n out.”

there was a layer of uncomfortable silence amongst the group before all hell eventually broke loose.

midoriya, uraraka, and iida immediately sprung from their seats in the common room, yelling “what?!” in unison. tsuyu and her frog-like mannerisms were more idle, but still surprised nonetheless.

todoroki was unfazed by their reactions, actually expecting it to go that way considering he’s never brought up any topics of that nature before. at the very least, he’s thankful he decided to say this when it was just the five of them. compared to what the whole class’s reaction would have been like, this was incredibly tame.

todoroki was used to always listening to what others had to say and never being the subject of the conversation when it came to dating.

but now things were different. he was openly admitting to them that he was regarding someone romantically. that he possibly sought a relationship with this someone—wanting to be committed to them and become the very best person he could be right next to them. to the four, this was coming completely out of left field.

after everyone simmered down and let the news sink in, the dual-haired boy resumed his thought,

“but i’m not sure how to do it.”

though the entirety of the group never had any experiences when it came to dating, they knew enough from media and pop culture to get an idea on how to help him. more than todoroki could imagine on his own anyway.

“i know! how about we go with the romantic and suave approach!” uraraka suggested. the rest asked her to elaborate.

“it’s simple! it starts by you leaving a note on her desk right before class, saying to meet you on the rooftop of the school! before the designated time, you should wait there for her with a bouquet of flowers, and then when she arrives, confess your feelings and ask her out!”

midoriya rubbed a finger against his cheek, skeptical. “i don’t think that sounds as simple as you’re making it out to be.”

tsuyu chimed in beside him. “those kinds of ideas usually only work well in books, ochako.”

pursing her lips, uraraka gave her plan a once-over, and realized it did seem a bit more involved and out of character than what todoroki was used to.

despite sharing a few more ideas with one another, they couldn’t narrow it down to any perfect one.

that was when iida clapped his hand, bringing everyone’s attention to him.

“alright, i think we’re starting to blow this whole ‘operation’ way out of proportion,” he said.

“if you’re honest about the way you feel about her and show it sincerely, i’m sure she’ll consider your feelings. you don’t have to do anything extravagant when it comes to asking someone out.”

listening throughout every word, todoroki nodded. meanwhile the other three were astonished that their class representative could be so whimsical when it came to romance, which in turn, iida was conflicted by. however, at the very least he was glad they could help out a friend. and so, todoroki went about his day with their discussion in mind.

he found that in many occurrences, whenever he crossed by you and thought of it as a chance to ask you out, there would always be someone to come in and take your time away. leaving him to stand there awkwardly before dismissing the fated question for later.

eventually, the sky dimmed and evening arrived, and by then, the whole class was already back at their dormitory and about to have dinner.

through some rather convenient circumstances, you two were actually assigned on kitchen duty that night.

“it’s been getting pretty cold lately so i was thinking we should cook up a hot pot for everyone.” you gave your idea to him as you pulled out some ingredients from the fridge, waiting for his reply, but it came a few seconds later than you were expecting.

“right. sounds like a good idea,” todoroki answered a tad late. upon realizing it was only going to be the two of you making dinner tonight, his mind was occupied by what he and his friends spoke about earlier.

that was when he started overthinking the situation and absentmindedly half-assed his work.

“todoroki, the cut on the tofu is slightly uneven.” you reviewed his cutting board. looking down, he saw the inconsistent slices of tofu limp in front of him. if bakugou were the executive chef for the evening, he would’ve had to hear an earful from him.

“sorry…” he apologized quietly, reaching out for another cube of tofu to cut.

“is everything okay? i know you’re still learning how to cook, but i’ve seen you show some significant improvement on your knife skills recently.” you voiced your concern for him.

the white and red-haired boy stared at the white bean curd while hearing your worried tone and couldn’t find it within himself to continue the task. it was now or never he thought. he laid the knife flat on the cutting board.

“actually, i wanted to ask you something.” he turned toward you. “do you… want to go out with me?”

nothing but the sound of the fire running on the stove could be heard in the kitchen. todoroki didn’t move his eyes away from you, watching you nearly drop the plate of siu choy and shiitake mushrooms out of shock as your mouth was hanging open.

when you caught onto your bearings, you let out a small laugh. “oh… i… wasn’t expecting that,” you admitted honestly, placing the ingredients on the counter safely.

the boy furrowed his brows. “is that a no?”

“n-no! i mean that isn’t my answer! i–” you fumbled with your words, cheeks warming up now that his confession had finally sunk in. in the meantime, todoroki found your reaction quite amusing. the corner of his lip quirked into a grin.

“what i mean to say is that yes, i’d love to go out with you.” you accepted the offer wholeheartedly. todoroki would be lying if his heart wasn’t throbbing from anticipation. he’s glad he’s able to rest and put that aside.

“now let’s continue making this hot pot together!” you cheered, smiling widely and he found comfort in your words before resuming slicing the tofu.

[a-libra-writes]

Okay but now I have to ask, could you maybe do a sort of part 2 for that ask with all the Shelby brothers falling for reader, where the reader chooses only one of them? Like different headcanons for each brother, with the different reactions and all? I thank you a lot❤❤❤❤

Anon rolling in here for THE ANGST. sequel to this post!

Choosing Tommy ->

A not-so-small, arrogant part of him knew this would happen, but at the same time, he's relieved. You started to chip away at the façade he presents to others, and you've seen him at some truly low points. You don't want to "save" him, you don't want him for his power or money - you just see him as he is.

And when you both decide to be a couple, he starts to find that terrifying. Especially if this is after he lost Grace, he suddenly feels too vulnerable. You could disappear like she did, or you could leave him once you realize what a fucked up family you've gotten into.

But you're sweet to him, and sweeter to Charlie, and some days Thomas is so full of anxiety that it'll all come crashing down, he regrets hiring you all that time ago. Maybe if he hadn't, you'd be safer, or happier. That ugly thought passes, but it sticks to him during the awful days.

John and Arthur anticipated this would happen, and it's just one more sore point between them and Tommy. They'll move on eventually, though more than once they've given their brother a heated talking-to about treating you properly.

Though his siblings and Polly begin to notice some changes in his mood, some more optimism, some less... usual self-sabotaging Thomas behavior. And he starts learning all sorts of things about you, things he hadn't noticed because he was too busy trying to impress you or stuck in his own head.

Choosing Arthur ->

Arthur's in total disbelief when you tell him your feelings. He takes so long to respond, you assume he's not interested, and he has to quickly keep you from leaving the room. He just didn't expect... after all the awful wounds you've stitched up, and the bad days you've coaxed him out of ... he really didn't think you'd want to stick around. You saw all that and you still chose him? Especially compared to Tommy?

Yeah, he's got that major inferiority complex to Tommy. It's probably best that you act ignorant to Tommy's crush on you, or Arthur will become anxious and insecure. He'd never say it out loud, but his anxiety tells him that you'll change your mind if he screws up hard enough.

When you express these worries to Polly, she makes sure Tommy doesn't even attempt to interfere. Even him being too friendly with you might be seen as you 'choosing' him. No, it's not a healthy dynamic, and it makes things uncomfortable for up to a year... but then things settle down.

Arthur will start to have more confidence the longer you're with him, and will believe you genuinely love him for who he is. And you do! It's just difficult for him to deal with during his darker days.

John is pretty fucking annoyed when you go with Arthur, but after a while he starts to see how good you are for him and he appreciates you. He starts treating you more like a sister. Once your odd sort-of cold war with Tommy settles down, he also appreciates what you do for Arthur and is willing to say so... though there's still some odd longing in his eyes now and again.

Choosing John ->

Wait… what? He honestly didn’t expect this, but when you tell John your feelings, he’s jazzed. He knew you felt the same way! There definitely wasn’t horrible, self-crushing doubt in the wee hours of the morning as he drank himself sick.

Naturally, his enthusiasm doesn’t go over well with his brothers. Arthur is pissed, but willing to hang his head and stand aside. Tommy can’t believe it. He’s almost offended. Rest assured, John will come to blows to Arthur at some point in the future (but then they’ll work it out, thanks to you and Polly), but John and Tommy will always have an icy tension simmering under the surface. In private, Polly tells Tommy to knock it the hell off and just let you be happy. She knows he just hates losing.

John might still have some lingering doubts about why you chose him, but he struggles to voice them out loud... You'd just notice days where he'd become more insecure or listless, and you'd have to reassure him in a roundabout way. Goodness knows these men can't just talk about their feelings.

Though after a while of being with you, he has plenty of confidence and less and less insecurity. He loves having you as a partner and can't believe how lucky he is.

[tearsofgrace]

endings are hard... but they aren’t impossible

tldr; the good place fucking nailed the finale, supernatural completely and utterly bombed it.

tags: wc--4.5k, gif heavy, spn meta, the good place, supernatural finale, spn wank, all gifs are mine, if you read til the end there’s a pretty gif

so i recently finished the good place (i was watching w my family and we finally had time to sit down and watch the last season) and god fucking dammit that ending is FLAWLESS. literally flawless. 

and because i’m, well, me… i spent most of the time during that hour long finale thinking about how supernatural could have had even a fraction of that and avoided so much heartbreak. 

anyways. i decided to compare them. to REALLY compare them. to get into the nitty gritty of why the fuck the good place ending left me feeling, as the finale is all about, sated and complete. and why the spn ending left me confused, lost, broken, betrayed, unable to even enjoy my comfort show at all until a dear friend finally just watched an episode (8.08) start to finish with me. 

so without further ado (always wanted to say that) here’s the good place/supernatural finale meta that no one asked for

comedy

we’ll start small. both these shows have excellent comedy. in extremely different ways… but still

in the good place finale, the comedy was perfect. whether it was jason reappearing in the forest, michael trying to get through The Door, tahani reversing the “hot bod” bit on eleanor, every comedic moment was actually pretty emotional and added something to the show. they deepened characters’ meanings, added to their relationships, and made the audience think as much as they made the audience laugh.

in the spn finale… the comedy was the pie gag. the whole sam shoving pie into dean’s face. beyond this being… like meta as hell (the whole prank thing) it doesn’t have any depth to it.

and to add salt to the wound, this “hilarious” thing happens RIGHT AFTER salmondean have a conversation about missing jack and cas that is equal parts flat and infuriating. the brothers, in particular sam about jack and dean about cas, should care more. this is their family. and family is everything to them. but, no, by all means pie dean in the face.

last lines

this one IRKS me. okay. 

the last line of the good place  "I'll say this to you, my friend, with all the love in my heart and all the wisdom of the universe: Take it sleazy.” “All right.”  is ICONIC. okay?

it’s a reference to season 1 that doesn’t feel fan-servicey. it’s kinda honestly emotional cuz it’s like a message to us, the audience. it perfectly completes michael’s arc. it captures the light-hearted vibe of the show while also somehow managing to be poignant. you can see it coming like the second before it happens but it’s also not the obvious choice. it’s just. goddamn it’s good.

the last line of supernatural…. is… “and cut.” not even said by one of j2. i mean i know it’s a meta show but COME ON ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME??????????

now i hear you shouting wait but that’s just the end of the thank you message. okay fine whatever. in that case the last lines are “Hey, Sammy.” “Dean.” (i couldn’t bring myself to gif that moment)

i’m sorry but. that’s predictable. that’s obvious. that’s boring. that’s flat. sure, it celebrates the bond between the brothers. but like… that’s not what this show is about anymore. it’s not just about sam and dean winchester it’s about what they’ve created. it’s about the world they’ve saved, the family they’ve made, about how they always keep fighting but nope we get bland, boring, coulda seen ‘em coming from miles away lines for the very end. that’s fine.

montages

the spn finale is like 50% montages that don’t make sense and are poorly done and not emotional

the good place has a montage of michael being human that brought me to tears

timing

here’s another short section. the good place finale was 53 minutes long as opposed to the usual 20 minute long runtime of every episode. granted, the fandom of the good place is very different, but STILL there was no documentary telling the fans things they ALREADY knew (there was a short special after the ep, but the episode itself was still far longer than normal). it was 53 minutes of plot. of really fucking good not rushed plot. 

the supernatural finale was… what 36 minutes long?? as opposed to the normal 40 minute runtime?? granted, we did get an hour long documentary of things we’ve all heard in cons and interviews a billion times so hey. take what you can get i guess.

character arcs

this is most of the meat of this meta. one thing we’ve all been harping on a TON is how they RUINED character arcs. soooo let’s go through and juxtapose some character arcs shall we

eleanor

eleanor shellstrop starts the show completely self-obsessed. she died getting hit by shopping carts while picking up margarita mix and let’s be real she’s a total icon. love her to death. she grows a ton, becomes one of the most selfless characters on the show, and starts to actually (jack forbid) CARE about things. it’s one of the most satisfying and relatable character arcs i’ve ever seen. 

it’s not just her selfishness either, her character is super multi-faceted and complex, and i feel like even in the end we’re getting to know her better. she’s afraid of commitment, always worried about what others’ actions will do to her, loves the trivial side of life, is queer as fuck (as acknowledged by the show in a way that’s not harmful at all but also isn’t explicitly bi/pan/unlabeled/omni etc, allowing queer fans to see their own identity in her), and is all around a HUMAN BEING. her ending at the beginning of the show was her death. her stupid, trivial, meaningless death where she was, as she puts it, all alone. and her final ending ISNT that. yes, everyone goes before her. and i think that’s purposeful. to show that she’s grown enough that being alone in some sense is okay.

but she’s never TRULY alone. and in the end. the REAL end. janet is there. the whole time. because eleanor asked her to be!! she got over her crazy need for independence and simply asked for help. and eleanor dies an amazing person that has become selfless, has found joy in philosophy while still enjoying trashy content, has fixed her relationship with her mother, and has found a sense of completion. eleanor’s life ends on her terms, and it’s beautiful.

dean

alright. now just as you’re feeling all warm and fuzzy let’s look at dean winchester’s ending. you’ve heard it a million times, so i’ll be brief. dean was raised to be a hunter, a soldier, a killing machine with no feelings and no purpose. he was raised to die scared on a hunt, his life over because of some mistake he made because he will NEVER measure up. at least that’s what john and everyone else told him with the exceptions of some of his family (and family don’t end in blood). he started to accept that he didn’t have to have this. he started to realize that he could CHOOSE what his ending was. 

the beautiful thing is, we never truly got to see what that was. i personally like to think it’s similar to the roadhouse michael locked him in while he was trapped in his own mind. a safe place for hunters, somewhere he (and cas in my opinion, but that’s not important) could settle down and still be in the life. it would be an amazing tribute to jo and ellen, and just all around a great ending. he wouldn’t have to be scared, but he wouldn’t have to conform to some apple pie facade of normalcy. and ya know what?? say that he died so he could have peace i dare you. because dean doesn’t find peace until sam is there anyway so i beg of you WHAT WAS THE FUCKING POINT. 

dean winchester died scared. dean winchester died on a hunt. dean winchester died on one of john’s old hunts. dean winchester died not directly at the hands of a monster, but at the hands of a mistake. his mistake. dean winchester died without ever working through the trauma of his best friend in the entire world confessing his love in a final act of self-sacrifice. dean winchester died in a way that leaves a sour taste in my mouth and does not at all show the audience what he’s been through and how much he’s grown. dean winchester did not die on his terms, and he deserved better.

chidi

okay back to happy. chidi anagonye. by far my personal favorite good place character (don’t tell anyone i always say jason cuz he and i are very similar). chidi in the last few episodes is SO DRASTICALLY different than the chidi we meet at the beginning. he’s decisive, confident, self-assured, and it’s amazing to see. he’s not afraid of life anymore. he’s not afraid to make the wrong decision and forever alter his reality, because he’s okay with failure. 

at the beginning, chidi was so petrified of life that… it killed him. and in the end, he’s completely at peace with every decision he makes, even the final one. yes, he considered staying for eleanor, but that just shows how his moral code and his compassion for others is still very much still intact. it shows the audience that you can be confident and decisive without being a selfish asshole. 

chidi leaves the good place knowing that it’s the right thing to do. knowing without a doubt that his time has come. the old chidi never would have been able to fathom being that sure about something. it’s beautiful. it’s a development that can give the audience peace, can show them that this drastic of change is possible, and that chidi became a better person for all of it. chidi went on his own terms, and it was beautiful.

sam

… this one might be controversial… but sam winchester. god i hated sam’s ending. at first i was kinda okay with it. like, okay fine he got his normal life. but, really, in the end that’s not what sam wanted. he started to realize that he didn’t need that apple pie, white picket fence life. he didn’t need the wife and the kids and the backyard and the barbecues because that is NOT sam’s personality and i will throw hands on that. 

that’s not to say he doesn’t want some sort of romance, maybe even kids, but not in that way. he lets himself see that he doesn’t need to be defined by his rebellion to john. doesn’t need to be defined by going to college or any of those “normal” smart kid things because it doesn’t fit him. and that’s okay! but how does sam’s story end? it ends with a wife (that isn’t even important enough to show her face). with kids. with a goddamn white picket fence. we think he’s still hunting to some extent… but it’s not the arc we were led to believe would happen. it’s not this amazing leader sam that we see in season 12-14, uniting hunters and organizing them. 

he had SO MUCH potential and they throw it away on a vanilla ending that shows only surface level pain at losing his brother. he doesn’t even invite the rest of their family to the wake for fuck’s sake. jared did an incredible job. pls don’t think i’m saying he didn’t. but that script…. sam winchester’s arc was cut short. he didn’t go on his terms, and he deserved better.

jason

jason mandoza. the only character that has ever embodied my complete dumbass energy to the insane extent that it exists. he went to hell for his impulsivity. he never thought before a decision. i aspire to be as reckless as jason while on earth. but he LEARNED. he got better, just like they all did. and by the end of the show, jason doesn’t need to be impulsive anymore. much like eleanor being left “alone,” the show does a masterful job with making him be the first one to go, capturing his old impulsiveness. but he chooses to leave. he takes his time in deliberation, waiting until a feeling of peace, of completion, of well, ‘true happiness’ (sorry cas stans, i’m right there with you) has settled over him. 

the ending of his story is one of growth, just like all these characters have been. and the best part? the show makes it comedic in the most poignant and beautiful way, because it’s jason, it had to be funny. we learn that jason has been in the woods for like, eons, just waiting to go through the door because he wants to give janet a necklace. he’s learned to simply wait. to be at peace with… nothing. his torture was being a monk, but in the end, jason embodies those ideals. his arc comes to fruition in an extremely satisfying way. jason goes on his own terms, and it’s beautiful.

castiel

this one is gonna hurt like a bitch. castiel is my comfort character. he’s my role model. he’s me in a lot of ways. i love him. so fucking much. so excuse me if this is slightly incoherent. i’m actually okay with cas’ ending… in a way. because his actual ending as an on-screen character? perfect. self-sacrifice while coming out and professing his love to dean winchester. a little bit bury the gays, but let’s be real, it’s supernatural. and “happiness is in just saying it” has to be the most powerful way to think of coming out. it takes away the fear, it takes away so much of the pain that can follow. because the joy is in just saying the words.

it’s how this was treated on the show that makes cas’ character arc terrible (and we haven’t even gotten to 15.20). YOU CANNOT JUST IGNORE A LOVE CONFESSION. that is god awful writing and i will never change my mind on that. cas deserved his family to care about him. to at least address and be sad about the fact he was gone. jesus fucking christ after everything castiel deserved at least that. and then we go to 15.20. cas is in heaven. cas is serving god. cas is right back where he started. now, i’m coming off a little strong. 

if the show had decided to show us cas and jack in heaven makin’ the world a better place… i woulda come around to it. i woulda realized that that’s not REALLY erasing 12 years of character development and cas realizing that his whole identity isn’t just him serving heaven and isn’t just him being an angel and that he’s so much more than all of that and he could still be happy as a human… because really he’s with his son. but they didn’t show us that. they barely even mentioned him. and to me. that counts as a bad character arc. and i’m sorry if you disagree. castiel may have gone on his own terms, but they treated that beautiful sacrifice with disrespect and disdain, plus resolved his arc by putting him back where he started. he deserved better.

tahani

*deep breaths guys this is a long post i’m sorry* anywayyyy tahani!!! we love tahani obviously. let’s talk about her arc, because it always kinda bothered me. throughout the show, we see all the other character’s growing and expanding their knowledge of right and wrong. and, don’t get me wrong. we see tahani grow a lot. but she makes a lot of the same types of comments and shit like that. but it’s how she treats the reactions to those comments. by the end of the show, she laughs at the caricature of herself that the others see. she isn’t looking for vindication in name-dropping, she just does it. she is far less self-absorbed, and is genuinely interested in those around her. she fixes her relationships with her sister and her parents in a way that doesn’t feel forced and actually feels like a beautiful, healthy family reunion. 

she has a list and she does everything on it. it’s worth noting, that the things on her list are not at all what they would have been at the beginning of the show. most of them are humble “labor” type tasks, and all of them are in self improvement. tahani’s end on the show is not the same as everyone else’s. she realizes that she doesn’t need to be done. that there doesn’t have to be an end to self-improvement. and she becomes an architect. the writers perfectly embody her transformation from a self-obsessed rich girl who has never done a thing for herself and laughs at the lower-class to a down-to-earth worker that simply doesn’t want the journey to end. 

it’s incredible how perfectly the writers were able to close off these character arc’s without it feeling forced, and without ignoring their character development. imagine that. tahani chooses her own way, and it’s beautiful.

jack

jack’s ending may be the only one that i’ve actually somewhat come to terms with. it’s not terrible. it’s not great. but it’s not nearly as bad. because ignoring that awful monologue about every drop of rain and shit, jack really does end up helping people. he ends up doing something that he loves and that makes the world a better place. and he doesn’t lose his personality in it. but. i dunno, that’s still his destiny, right? to create paradise. and this is a show about ripping up the rule book, about choosing free will above all else… so to have every single character just fulfill their destiny is cheap. 

still… i’ll try to be unbiased. because really at the beginning of jack’s time on the show, he’s unsure what he wants. and at least, in the end, he’s sure. he has a wisdom that he’s always had but he’s now using. and i’m good with that. but what’s NOT okay about jack’s ending is the lack of on-screen family. jack learns that family is important. sam, cas, dean those are the people he cares about. and you’re telling me he would just NEVER see them again? and be okay with that? i know he rebuilds heaven with cas, but we don’t even get a story about him rescuing cas from the empty. and he seems in 15.19 to not be that concerned about it (after the amazing emotional scene at the beginning). jack should have cared about his family. he did. but they ruined that for him. so jack kline deserved better.

michael

oh man where do i start. michael’s growth is the biggest on the show. i mean. he starts as a literal demon and ends a human. he gets better, he falls in love with humanity (*castiel fan in me sobbing again*) and he chooses over and over to be good instead of bad. his whole arc is a classic redemption arc, and every single beat just gets better. he chooses selfishly to side with humans but in the end it turns out to be the best decision he could have made. because he develops emotions, he develops compassion, he develops a moral compass. 

and his end reflects that. because to complete this arc of a demon becoming more human… he literally becomes human!!!! it fits so well. and he’s allowed to make mistakes and be happy and gain all that humanity has to offer. this just shows that human!endgame for cosmic beings that become more human WORKS SO WELL (and it shoulda happened for cas and jack that’s all i’m saying). michael went on his own terms, and it was beautiful.

eileen

oh boy… this one stings. because they brought her back, used her up, and we never saw her again. eileen was one of the best side characters on the show, and they rarely addressed her arc. she comes onto the show as a hunter seeking revenge, and gets that revenge in the same episode. her s15 arc is focused on what’s real and what’s not, with her relationship to sam admittedly being a central part of her character because… it’s supernatural and women can’t exist without that. but still! eileen grows throughout the show and in the end… we don’t even know what happens to her. it’s as if her arc wasn’t important enough to even glance at. 

it’s as if the connections the boys make outside of each other mean nothing when in reality they mean everything. they prove that the co-dependency is behind them and that family doesn’t end with blood and that real connections can be formed between people that last a lifetime. eileen was a disabled hunter that was shown to still be one of the best in the business, and they didn’t even give her the courtesy of a goodbye. eileen didn’t go on her own terms, and she deserved better.

janet

this is gonna unbalance my list but goddammit janet’s ending was perfect. she was a not-robot, not-girl that should have been incapable of feelings. but throughout the series we get to watch as she learns first-hand about human emotions and processes them. she cares about the humans in her charge and fights for them on multiple counts. 

in the end, we see janet come to terms with both her cosmic being side, and her human side. she never stops being with the “cockroaches.” she sees them all leave, she’s there for them while they’re there, and she also continues to speak her mind and live autonomously. janet was a non-human character done right. she lived on her own terms, and it was beautiful.

some honorable mentions

spn ignored (in the finale) chuck, amara, stevie, charlie, jody, donna, garth, bess, the other angels, claire, kaia, patience, alex, and the list goes ON in favor of focusing on JUST sam and dean. did none of those characters at least deserve a quick goodbye??????

the good place wrapped up multiple arcs i had completely forgotten about in a totally natural and not forced way. mindy, doug forester, (the mushroom guy, i know, it took me a second), pillboy, donkey doug, kamilah, tahani’s parents, eleanor’s mother, eleanor’s friends, chidi’s best friend, vicki, shawn, glenn, simone and so many that i’m forgetting all got satisfying ends that they totally deserved. 

they even fucking resolved FROG GUY’S arc and gave him a real frog. that’s right. frog guy (jeff) had a better character arc resolution than dean motherfucking winchester. 

heaven and hell

obviously in very different vehicles, both shows explore in depth the realities of the afterlife. and lemme tell ya, at the end of the day, one sits a whole lot better than the other. 

the good place finale ends this quest for the perfect afterlife by saying that everyone can improve and that an eternal paradise shouldn’t keep you from eternal rest. they pretty much make me wish that this is what our afterlife looked like. they handle everything with care so it’s balanced precariously in a way that doesn’t give you anxiety looking at it but instead fills you with peace and faith in humanity. 

supernatural addresses this series long battle between heaven and hell by creating a heaven where you drive for forty years without seeing the people (cough cough cas and jack not his parents) that matter to you and drink beer that tastes like shit. a place you can’t be happy or find any sense of peace until your brother has died and he’s there too.

and hell… well they barely even address it. there’s a new queen of hell i guess? but so what. it’s still very much heaven and hell in a way that’s the worst and hey plus to them… makes me wanna stay alive thank you very much. oh and purgatory is in shambles and not functioning properly cuz all that eve bullshit.

loose ends

whenever something is ending, you gotta tie up the loose ends. not in a “oh, we must wrap everything up and leave no stone unturned” kinda way but in a “wow, we should probably try to make this unambiguous because this is the last time we will ever see these characters” kinda way. 

the good place does that. so fucking masterfully. all these side plots with all these different characters were taken care of all while focusing on the main six characters. we get to see how their intervention has changed everyone else. for example, mindy’s arc is wrapped up perfectly, with eleanor going to save her.

plus different running jokes like “take it sleazy” are wrapped up, we revisit really old callbacks like the original neighborhood, and all of it feels natural and in the moment. it feels like full circle in a way that doesn’t erase growth. 

supernatural, on the other hand, left a million loose ends open. what happened to the boys they saved? where the fuck are jody, donna, etc.? did eileen make it back? cuz sam was pretty upset about that. what happened to it “being loud” in the empty? hell, what happened to the empty? what happened to hell? what about chuck? it woulda been nice to see just for a second what became of him. did charlie and stevie make it (i’m very invested in that relationship)? if we’re taking the original ending… why the fuck is jimmy there? did kansas just all,,, die? 

i’m not saying they needed to address everything… but god a few wrapped up storylines besides the brothers wouldn’t have hurt

coloring

can i just… real quick… as a giffer lodge a complaint

the good place has beautiful vibrant coloring in the finale

spn has like bland washed out whatever the fuck that is coloring. it’s not even the dark early aesthetic cuz they dropped that it’s just… ew. so. do with that what you will. 

conclusion

first… while writing this i realized just HOW MUCH it’s not about destiel… like believe me. i knew i wasn’t just pissed about destiel. but holy shit it’s not destiel at all like did i even mention destiel that much???? this was never about a ship. this was just a trash finale. 

in the end. the good place writers knew what they were doing. they knew their fans, they knew their characters, they knew their world, and they knew how to wrap it up in a way that was satisfying and sad and perfectly fit the tone of the whole show. it wasn’t out of character or rushed, basically every loose end was tied up without the audience even realizing that’s what they were doing, and i feel happy and complete having watched it. 

the supernatural ending was a betrayal. flat out. to the audience that has stuck by it in a way bigger way than the good place fandom. to the characters that have helped so many people. to the actors that have given so much of their lives. to the other members of the crew, to certain writers… all of it was just a slap in the face.

we deserved better guys. there are better endings possible. so i’m sorry. i really am. but i guess… that’s what fanfic is for, right?

[kyuuppi]

vegetable stew

Pairing: Kenma x Reader (f)

Contents: hurt/comfort; angst and fluff; body dysmorphia; eating disorder (negative thoughts, fat shaming, insecurity, mentions of starvation)

Word Count: 2.1k

Kenma has always been observant.

It was a large part of his success as a setter and even now his keen observational skills contribute to his career as a professional gamer. He tends to notice things others don’t and lately that means noticing how you’ve changed.

The more he thinks about it the more difficult it is to pinpoint the exact starting point of your behavior. Haven’t you always preferred baggy clothing?

He remembers the pretty blue sweater you used to treasure back in high school, wearing it every chance you got as soon as the weather report hinted at anything lower than 10°C. He loved that sweater too—not just because of the cute sweater paws it gave you or how it almost completely covered the shorts you wore beneath, offering an unobstructed view of your shapely thighs—but instead he relished in the way it seemed to make you feel. The confidence and joy in your expression was clear as day when you wore your favorite outfits and early on in your relationship he had quickly learned that somehow your happiness was synonymous to his own.

Hence Kenma’s current frustrations in seeing that spark of joy and self-confidence gradually diminishing in the past several weeks.

Although that particular sweater had long since left your wardrobe within the first few years of university, as well-loved and worn out as it was, the more recent favorites of yours have also seemed to have gone lately. It had been a while since you had worn the short yellow polka dot dress you had been so eager to show Kenma the first day you got back from the mall with your roommates. Every pair of shorts and colorful tennis skirts had also left your weekly rotation, leaving behind only dull sweatshirts with childhood cartoon characters and baggy joggers.

Objectively, Kenma hardly cared about what you wore. If fastening a potato sack around your form made you happy, Kenma wouldn’t bat an eye—the problem stemmed from the fact these clothes didn’t make you happy. Moreover, the bland clothing brought with them their own slew of behavioral changes.

You no longer wished to go out and you avoided taking pictures of yourself, your social media suffering from an obvious lack of cheeky selfies or “outfit of the day” posts as of late. However, the most concerning change of all was your refusal to eat.

Kenma had a habit of forgetting to eat himself. He rarely felt the mild twinges of hunger, his attention generally hyper-focused on something else whether it was a game, a video needing editing, or a class project he had pushed off for far too long. It was only when his own stomach growling would startle him or the hunger pains got unbearable that he would acknowledge the human requirement of sustenance (not that the instant ramen in his cabinets provided much nutrients anyhow).

You were much more in tune with your body and, unlike him, you looked forward to eating; scheduled your days around it, even.

Your mornings began with a balanced breakfast—a meal Kenma was rarely even awake in time for—followed by a generous lunch break in which you would intentionally put everything on pause. Regardless of how much work you had to do you always made time to put everything down and have a decent lunch. It was good for your soul, you would say. A time to live in the moment and relieve yourself of stress.

For dinner you often made it a point to eat with others, whether it was going to a rowdy Korean BBQ with some friends or a dinner date at home with just him, you enjoyed sharing a meal surrounded by the people you love. On top of it all, you frequently had snacks: small bags of crackers, slices of fruit, or a few cookies you made yourself.

You loved cooking almost as much as you loved eating; most of the times he invited you over you brought a large bag with you filled to the brim with ingredients he wouldn’t have a clue what to do with. You would chastise him about his awful eating habits, grimacing at the ramen and chip wrappers overflowing in the kitchen trash can before you diligently prepare a meal for you both, healthy and flavorful, full of the vegetables he hadn’t had since the last time he went home to visit his mom.

You made him look forward to meal times too, if only to see the way you light up when he compliments your cooking or the pure bliss when you take the first bite of your favorite side dish. Eating with you became one of his favorite parts of the day.

And so that last time you made him dinner—a steaming plate of curry with shrimp tempura—the normally delicious food suddenly turned sour on his tongue when he realized you had only made him dinner.

“I’m just not very hungry today,” you had assured him with a smile that didn’t quite reach your eyes.

Foolishly, he hadn’t said anything at the time.

Maybe you had a large lunch, maybe you had a stomach ache, maybe you just didn’t want curry today—at that point in time he had no reason to think there was something seriously wrong. He had no reason to think you were starving yourself.

It wasn’t until weeks later when all the evidence stacked up, the many different signs piecing themselves together like a puzzle until it was impossible not to see the picture, even if a few were still missing.

Your baggy clothing, your refusal to eat anything, your off-handed comments about how the female characters in whatever fighting game he was playing had such nice figures—it became crystal clear what you were doing and it made him feel sick.

Kenma doesn’t generally care about others’ looks; he tends to worry more on how he is perceived than how he perceives others but he is confident that he rather likes your body as it is. He would rather die than admit how often he finds his gaze wandering when your legs are bare or how his eyes naturally trace the curve of your waist down to the width of your hips his fingers twitch to touch—he has had many thoughts about your body, none of which have ever been negative.

Even so, he doesn’t mind if you want to change yourself. He isn’t foolish enough to think he has the right to dictate how you decide to present yourself to this world, but he refuses to allow the reason for your change to be one that stems from low self-esteem or insecurity.

When you step into Kenma’s apartment, weary from a long day of classes and the extra hours spent at the gym, the last thing you expect is to be greeted by the scent of some type of stew, warm and hearty. Your stomach clenches longingly but you quickly reprimand yourself—you already reached your tiny caloric limit for the day.

You have hardly made it into the living room when Kenma comes out from the kitchen, dyed hair tied in a low bun but messy, several strands poking out and sticking across his sweaty forehead. A dark blue apron is tied around his waist and his right hand holds a ladle, the perfect image of a frazzled housewife. If you weren’t so shocked by the scene you would have laughed.

“Welcome back,” he greets softly.

“Are you...cooking something?”

Kenma looks slightly embarrassed by your incredulous tone but not offended. In all the years you have known Kenma you have never seen him in the kitchen for longer than the three minutes required to heat up a bowl of noodles. Him slaving away in front of the stove for a bowl of homemade soup is nearly unfathomable to you.

“Vegetable stew...it’s my mom’s recipe,” your boyfriend explains sheepishly.

The mental image of Kenma shyly FaceTiming his mother as she patiently walks him through chopping up carrots and mixing spices makes your lips twitch upwards and you make your way past him to curiously survey his work.

“You didn’t have to go through the effort, I could have cooked you something, y’know,” you comment as you lean over the large pot on the stove.

The contents are a rich brown color with hints of potatoes, carrots, and onions peaking out. You’re gifted another pang of hunger and you quickly step back as if it would prevent you from falling into temptation.

Kenma quietly slips into the kitchen directly behind you, his chest nearly brushing your arm as he speaks.

“It's okay, I wanted to cook for us this time.”

You freeze.

Immediately, you break into a cold sweat, the prospect of eating sending you into a state of anxiety. You can’t eat—you don’t deserve to eat. Not when your arms are so flabby, your waist so undefined, your inner thighs so close to each other—

“I appreciate it,” you start.

Your voice sounds unnaturally high even to your own ears.

“But I’m not hungry—I had a really big lunch.”

Turning, you try to offer him an apologetic smile but his face looks off. His lips are pulled into a slight frown and his eyes seem to be looking through you, as if he knows you’re lying.

“Y/n...I don’t like what you’re doing.”

You attempt to laugh but it comes out hollow.

“I’m not doing anything bad, just dieting a bit.”

“I think you’re being a little extreme.”

You huff, starting to feel defensive. You don’t want to have this conversation, not now, not ever.

“Kenma, I’m totally fine, I promise.”

“I’m worried about you,” he insists.

“I’m telling you there’s nothing to worry about, I’m being safe.”

“Skipping meals isn’t healthy.”

“Kenma, being this fat isn’t healthy!”

The words escape before you can think to stop them and you can already feel the shame pricking at your eyes as you turn away. You don’t want to see your boyfriend’s look of disgust once he realizes you’re right, once he realizes how fat and unattractive his girlfriend is. Kenma is skinny, he deserves a petite girlfriend who is just as tiny, a girl with slender legs that look cute in shorts and a stomach that lays flat regardless of the time of day. He deserves the sexy girls in his video games, in shape from years of training and perfected suited for tight leather bikini tops.

You don’t realize you’re shaking until Kenma wraps his arms around your shoulders, burying his face into the side of your neck. He lets out a shuttered sigh and if you didn’t know any better you’d think he’s crying as well.

“I love you,” he murmurs against your skin, “and I don’t like seeing you hurting yourself. If you want to lose weight, I’ll help you. We can make healthy foods together and eat them together and exercise together—just please stop skipping meals.”

Your throat feels like it's stuffed with cotton so you can only nod in agreement, raising one hand to weakly wipe at the hot tears staining your cheeks.

The two of you stand like that, huddled in the middle of the kitchen, for several long minutes until the last of your tears have gone before Kenma gently pushes you to sit down at the coffee table. He prepares two steaming bowls full of vegetable stew for you both and you silently eat as Kenma tells you how low calorie the broth is and how many nutrients his mom said were in the vegetables he used. He tells you about a new fitness game on the Nintendo Switch that you two can play together. By the time you finish your meals, Kenma has already promised to wake up early to go jogging around the neighborhood together even though you know he absolutely hates waking up early and exercising when he doesn’t have to.

Your chest aches with how much he loves you, how far he’s willing to go just if he thinks it will help you and make you happy.

A small part of your mind begs you not to listen. It insists you’ll be fat forever if you don’t starve yourself; no pain, no gain. But the more rational part of you gazes into those soft golden eyes, filled with concern and love as he rambles on about the best sources of protein—all stuff he had learned from his professional volleyball player friend Hinata—and you know your answer.

Kenma loves you, he would do anything to see you happy and healthy and you would do anything to please him.

You love him more than you hate yourself.

[softcallofdutyimagines]

Hello!! Can we have an couple of HCs of the safehouse bois (COD: Cold War) loving their curvy fem s/o? (and maybe trying to make her feel happy in her body if she's insecure of feels weird?)

Thankie and sorry for the oddly specific request 😅

Djsjsjsj ok ik you have like two other requests, and they'll be coming!!! But this struck such a mood I had to skip the line lol.

Honestly, like the way I tried to treat myself to some ✨ s p i c e y ✨ lingerie that just arrived and it fits literally everywhere else except that, ofc the cup size is an absolute JOKE, i-

Anyway, I digress lmao. Thank you for the request(s) btw, and enjoy!!!

---

Adler

Personally, he doesn't strike me as the kind of guy to have a particularly strong preference for any one "type"

But in the era where the super tall, super slim, super models reign supreme, he understands that sometimes it's hard to feel pretty if you're built like anything else

After all, I don't think any of the guys know how it feels to see yourself as "unattractive" more then he does

I mean, if he'd been cut a little deeper or on a different angle, he could've needed whole skin grafts, or even physical therapy for his jaw

And who wants a guy as messed up and broken down as that, right?

But you... Oh, you're gorgeous

Adler is very soft and gentle when it comes to his appreciation for you and your body

While he does know how to express himself, he's not really the grand gesture type, like some of the others are

He is the biggest self love hypocrite, always quick to get down on himself and his facial scars, but absolutely cannot STAND to see you upset over you body

You chide him for this now and then, but he usually jokes it away

I know I said Adler doesn't really have a type, but don't think for a second that he'd pass up on a great thing when he gets it

I don't want to say "handsy" but he definitely likes to just... Touch you, when you're alone together

Not even necissarily in a sexual way, he just likes to appreciate the shape of you, you know?

Very into hugs from behind, or really at any angle, as long as he gets to feel his arms around your waist

Also, you can catch him absent mindedly caressing your hips with his knuckles or a lone finger whenever he's standing around with you

Hudson

Oh y'all ain't ready for this one lmao

I am 99% certain that behind that steely facade, is a man who loves nothing more then a THICC juicy Queen™

I'm so serious, like the curvier the better for this dirty dog lmao

The best part is, that the fun isn't in that he just goes feral when you two are alone (although he certainly could, in a rare mood)

He's actually really shy about it, and he doesn't want you to feel like that's the only reason he loves you

And while you do appreciate the respect he has for you, you'd be lying if you said you didn't like to tease him

A favorite of yours is to walk into his home office half or fully naked and watch him, very obviously, struggle to stay focused on his paper work

He knows he's weak, but damn it he can never last long before giving in and handing over whatever kind of attention you're seeking

You know, whatever that may be 😏

When you're feeling insecure however, he can sense it immediately and always seeks to get to the bottom of whatever is causing you to feel that way

Although he's rather direct, he's tactful and tries his best to know the right thing to say

He's a great listener, and will never hesitate to tell you how beautiful and special you are to him

Lazar

Lmao, I don't think there is any universe in which Lazar would not be in full support of being with a curvy woman

Especially as a big guy himself, you two are an absolute power couple

He is both literally and metaphorically your biggest hype man when it comes to your appearance

Also, 10/10 likes to give you gifts of clothes and the like that he thinks you might appreciate/look pretty darn good in

Honestly, it is rare to feel down about your body when in a relationship with him, but everyone gets insecure sometimes, and he gets that

Thankfully, he's a master comforter, and is always at the ready to give you the treatment you need to feel better

Typically you can expect snacks and cuddles if you're just feeling sad, and stuff like a massage or body kisses and so forth if you need a reminder that you're literally the most gorgeous woman on earth

Oh, and he's very protective of you and defensive of your looks

I kind of hate to use this terminology lmao, but Lazar is the Alpha™ everywhere he goes, and he has no problem reminding other guys of it

So if he sees someome else checking you out, he'll be sure to block their view and do something like make direct eye contact until they leave you be

Have you ever had a 6'4, powerlifter looking, tank of a man sneer directly at you before?

Not a good feeling, I assure you

Needless to say, you don't have to put up with much, if any harassment or other stupidity on Lazar's watch

Mason

Alex strikes me as the type who doesn't buy into the paper thin beauty standard that society like to push

Obviously that's great if you're just naturally thin and all! But mostly he's totally down for the curvy, "built like a brick house" type of woman

He appreciates the way that you can keep up with him when he has to do physical things around or outside the house

Alaska is a rather unforgiving place after all, so he finds great comfort in the support and companionship you have to offer him

You're like his little amazonian goddess, and he's always in awe of not only how unbelievably beautiful you are, but also how hardy and tough you can be

In fact, you and your body are so normalized and loved by him in his mind that it genuinely catches him off guard when you say you're feeling insecure about it

But in times like that, he loves to tell you how beautiful your body is, not just for the way it looks but for the things it can do

You're built so strong and tough, but also soft and feminine... he can't even think about being with anyone else

He's very into body worship, like Lazar is, but Alex is a lot more gentle and is extremely conscious of making sure you're alright as he goes along kissing and caressing

If he could only show you how beautiful you are to him, he would in a heartbeat, but for now he just hopes his words and actions are enough

Sims

Oh, you already know Sims loves a thicc, curvy snack of a woman lmao

Skinny guys always love the curvy ladies

He doesn't really go feral when you two are alone, but he's not exactly shy about having this hands all over you either

For sure he always greets you with a compliment, whether it be a look, a whistle, or words... he's prepared

Also, he's very vocal in having you understand that there is not a single outfit you look "bad" or "unflattering" in, even if it's just sweats and a t-shirt

In fact, he is so confident in you, that he loves to show you off when he can and if you're comfortable

Always introduces you as "his girl" and is never afraid to point out your new outfit, hair-do, nails, ect

I feel that Lawrence would be another case where it's quite rare indeed to feel insecure about your body, and so when such times do arise he takes it seriously

He's basically a gentler, more emotional version of Hudson

By that I mean, he's the type to want to talk it out (if you're up to it) and ask what's wrong or if someone said something to you

You'll always have a reliable listener and food advice giver in him, and somehow that seems to always do the trick

Woods

Honestly, Woods is Hudson part 2, except that he has all the vocalized pride of loving curvy women as Sims and Lazar

He's still careful to make sure he doesn't come off as a creep or something, mind you, but complimenting and loving on your body just comes naturally to him

Extremely handsy in private, and you've definitely swatted his hands away from your hips, waist, back, ect more then once

In public, I wouldn't exactly say "handsy" but he's determined to make sure everyone knows you're with him

He usually escorts you places with a hand gently placed either just above your tailbone or protectively wrapped around your waist

As independent as you may be, you must admit, it's nice to feel like a princess everywhere you go, escorted around by your knight in shining flannel

He'll even offer you his arm if he's feeling particularly gentlemanly, because yes, miracles can happen

Unfortunately, Frank is probably the worst wordsmith of all the gang, and is next to clueless on what to say if you're feeling down and insecure

At least to his credit he'll usually start off by admitting to that fact before giving it a try

"Well, you know I'm shit with words, but... I hope you also know that I love you the way you are"

Thankfully what he lacks in words, he makes up for in physical affection

Even if you're really only comfortable with some cuddling, he's gonna cuddle you so good!!! He's determined and will stop at nothing

After all, whatever it takes to make you feel every bit as amazing as he knows you are

[cuddlemen0w]

daily dose of failure | peter parker x reader

(+ the group aka mj, ned and harry)

a/n: heyaaa here’s part 2 and it’s longer than the first part so i hope it’s ok! ;) i’m still going with mostly peter’s pov cuz that’s what i wanna do duh.. also mj is gay now. deal with it. and i fancasted harrison as harry osborn :)

warnings: language, anxiety. are those warnings?

gif is from pinterest

previous

“For the record, I did not ghost you,” Peter said as he walked through the crowded hallway, Ned and Harry on each side of him.

“Yeah, yeah,” Harry huffs and rolls his eyes. “What were you doing then?” He shoots him an accusing eye.

“Self loathing?” Peter avoided eye contact, instead he played with the strap on his backpack. His two friends stare at him more intensely. “Fine! I ghosted you.”

“What are you taking about?” y/n’s cheery voice made them jump.

“You,” Ned immediately says, receiving a slap to the back of his head from Harry. “Did you not learn from yesterday?”

But y/n nor Peter heard Ned’s or Harry’s comments. And if one of them did, they ignored it.

“So, I saw you enjoyed yesterday?”

“Oh yes! But it’d be way better if you were there,” y/n’s voice softens then. “But at least I could have cheese nachos,” she joked.

“Ew,” Peter made a face as he shivered all over. “But whatever makes you happy.” His face was still crunched from the thought of the ‘nasty looking garbage food’ as he called it. The girl before him only laughed.

“It’s good, you’d know it if you’d actually try it.”

“Hell no, I’m not touching that.”

“Fine,” she says, her back already turning to go to her first class.

“No! I didn’t mean it! I swear!” he smiles finally. “I never mean it.”

y/n stops in her tracks, her beamy grin back on her face. “Sure thing, Petey.”

Peter’s cheeks warm up at the nickname, still not used to it even after all the years. He’s loved her for all of them.

He remembers the first time she called him that. They had one of their movie nights, this time at his place. With May gone to work, he had permission to let his friends stay the night. MJ was in the kitchen making popcorn along with Harry who was grabbing some soda. Ned was on a ‘pee break’. y/n cuddled up to him, her head on his shoulder, her breath brushing his neck. “Thank you, Petey.” What for? he asked that night. “This, all of this.” She broke up with a boy that night. He felt bad for being happy about it.

“Peter?” she broke him out of his thoughts. “You have math now right?”

He made a noise in response. If it was an agreement or confusion, she didn’t know. He stared at her for a moment longer. “Oh! Math!” he realised, he grabbed his books from the locker and sprinted away.

“Weirdo,” MJ appeared out of nowhere, startling the girl. Her hand shot up to her chest.

“I told you not to do that!”

“Well, you should know I never listen. Anyway, are you going to tell him or what?” MJ asks, swinging her arm around her friend’s shoulders.

“Tell him what?” y/n tried to play innocent. Her act faltering at the sight of MJ. Her brow raised and a knowing look on her face.

She groaned, “I’m still waiting for a sign if he even likes me like that.”

“You’re so oblivious.” MJ said quietly, shaking her head.

Peter locked his screen just as he saw Ned, y/n and MJ entering the lunch hall and heading for his table. His food splayed all over it along with a few of his textbooks, serving as a clear sign of holding someone’s place. He started cleaning his mess up when they neared him.

“If it’s another party I swear I’m ending our friendship,” MJ said as she bit into her sandwich.

“I’m with you on that,” y/n nudged her friend. “But if there’s any cute girls,” she wiggled her brows at MJ. Giggling slightly.

“Oh shut up!”

“What— What do you mean?” Peter panicks. All the colour from his face is out. What if she isn’t into boys at all? HOW COULD I NOT NOTICE? he freaks out internally.

MJ joined y/n in her laughter. She laughed so hard a few tears escaped her eyes. “Oh my!”

The latter is the one to break out of it first. Coughing slightly from laughing in between bites. “Cute girls, as in, for MJ.”

Peter’s eyes narrow. “What?” he said, his mouth open in confusion. All around the table, they could almost see the gears turning in his head. “Oh!”

“Yes, oh!” MJ’s laughter died down a bit. Only a tiny bit.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t—”

“It’s ok Peter, although I recon I told all of you,” MJ narrows her eyes now.

“Yes, but Peter wasn’t there,” Ned is the one to speak out. “He was doing— eh.”

Peter panicks again. Think of a quick lie! “Laundry!”

“Riiight,” MJ slowly nodded. “Because you totally know how to do that.”

y/n saved Peter from the intense stare of their friend, “C’mon MJ, let him breathe.”

“I just want to know what he’s doing all these times he ghosts us.” Well that’s a good point.

“As I said laundry.” Stick with one thing, he thinks to himself. “May wants me to learn, so I’ll know in college.” Damn, I’m good at this.

MJ glared one last time, “Sure.” She bit into the last piece of her lunch and left him only with Ned and y/n.

His palms sweat from being almost caught. He looked to his left, exchanging weird looks with Ned, then he turned to the girl opposite him. Her skin looked so beautiful in the midday, spring sun. Her hair looked soft for touch and her eyes coincidentally matched her shirt. “I— uh.. I gotta do laundry now actually, before we go to Harry’s. Okay, bye!” he excused himself quickly and almost ran out of the lunch hall.

“Weird huh?” Ned awkwardly said when only him and y/n remained.

“Yeah, weird.”

Peter was doing ‘laundry’.

He swung along the many buildings in Queens, checking if the neighbourhood was friendly and safe. His mask clad face scanned the many little alleys. It was a moment of peace for him, he felt free flying above the streets.

But it faltered when his phone dinged in his suit. He jumped to one of the roofs and fished it from the pocked that Tony installed into his new suit.

He opened the phone to find out Harry’s text.

“Yeah,” Peter said out loud. “This better be good.”

Everyone showed up at Harry’s. His football friends, few cheerleaders, the squat — all except Peter.

“Of course,” MJ muttered as soon as she got there and the brown haired boy wasn’t present. “Dude’s gonna miss his own funeral at this point.”

“Yeah,” Ned laughed nervously. His fingers fidgeted and teeth bit his lower lip. MJ took notice of that after his laughter lasted suspiciously long. But she choose not to say anything, yet.

Harry was the one to ease the bit of tension in his house. “Don’t worry, he’s gonna show up.” He paused to grab a drink. “Told me himself. And he’s got a surprise.”

“Surprise would be him showings up.”

“Well, who am I to tell what it is?”

MJ looked between her two male friends. Her eyes almost boring into their soul. “You two know something,” she stated. “And I’m gonna find out what.”

y/n entered the room right after Ned almost choked on his drink from fright. “Something wrong Neddy?”

“No, no. Not at all,” he smiled, like a kid caught doing something they shouldn’t. “We’re just talking about Peter.”

“What about him? Have you seen him? Is he going to show up?” she could go on but Harry saved them all.

“Yup, he’ll be here any moment now.”

The girl let out a relieved sighn, her shoulders relaxing and the fake half smile dropping from her lips. “Thank god, the more time I spent with your damn friends the more I wish I was ghosting you too.” She points to Harry.

“Peter is not ghosting us, remember? He’s doing laundry,” he points out. Making y/n laugh, Ned chuckle nervously and MJ to huff. “Don’t worry, he’ll show up. I threatened him.”

All of sudden, the door bell rang though the big Osborn house. Everyone around the living room fell silent, only the music played from the speakers. A blonde boy, that was closest to the hall went to open the door.

After a very awkward two minutes of silence, the guy returned with a stunned expression. His eyes wide and mouth hanging open.

“Who was it?” one of the other boys asked, but he didn’t need an answer. Right after the blonde, a red clad man walked in. Spider-man. In Harry Osborn’s house. The murmurs started to float around the room.

“Hi!” Peter said from his spot. He remembered himself. “Hello,” he said more deeply. There’s too many people, he thought. And all of them are looking at me. He had a sudden urge to mess his hair, something he did when he was nervous or stressed. Right now, he was both. But the superhero mask was in the way.

“I uh,” he paused to look at all the faces. Most had hanging mouths out of shock, some had eyes full of awe. His vision quickly found the one he was here for. y/n was standing between MJ and Ned. She was one of those in shock, but her mouth wasn’t hanging, nor were her eyes wide. She was one of those pinned to their place, unmoving, utterly shocked to do anything.

“I’m here to say something.” Peter’s voice trembled. All the confidence he told himself he has in the suit was gone. He was just a boy, standing before a girl in a room full of people. “My friend,” he nodded to assure, more himself than others. “He uh,” his breathing picked up. “He’s in,” his eyes glossed inside the red suit. “He’s in danger!” he let out.

“Peter?” y/n almost yelled out.

Peter freaked out. He was sure he fucked up now.

To his relief, she worriedly continued, “Peter is in danger?”

“Yes!” Play it cool Parker, play it cool. “I— Peter needs Ned, Ned Leeds.”

Ned pointed at himself, unsure what his best friend meant. “Yes, you! Now hurry, or he’ll be in much bigger trouble!” He then grabbed Ned’s arm. “Come on,” he whispered furiously.

They only stopped once they were far enough, that no one could eavesdrop or see them from a window. Ned panted from the quick pace Peter set. “What— what is— what’s going on?”

“I can’t do it!” Peter whisper-yelled. His mask in his hand now. “I thought, maybe if it wasn’t entirely me, I’d say it. But I can’t!” the vision of the mask in his hand blurred behind the tears. “I’m a coward! As always I am!”

Ned neared his best friend. “It’s okay, Pete.”

“It’s not!” he burst out, throwing his hands into the air, his face red. “I’m the biggest fucking loser in the goddamn universe!”

“It’s really not that bad.”

“How can you say that?”

“Because she likes you too.” It was a familiar voice. Behind them, MJ stood with her hands crossed. Both boy’s breaths hitched. “Yeah I know, Peter is Spider-man. What a surprise!” she mocked. “You really thought you were slick huh?”

“How?” Peter motioned between himself, the mask and her. His tears long forgotten, replaced by disbelief.

“Well, I started to notice your weird disappearances, and that,” she pointed far to the house behind her. “Was very obvious.”

“Does anyone else—”

“Know? If Harry doesn’t, then I don’t think so.”

Peter shook his head. “Good,” he breathed out.

MJ cocked her head, “Don’t mind me asking. But what the hell was that?” Again, she pointed to the big house.

“I tried to tell y/n my feelings,” he said, as a matter of fact. “Didn’t go very well.” He shook his head and chuckled. “Didn’t expect anything more from myself.”

Ned and MJ shared a look. Both stepped closer to the now kneeling Peter. Their hands soothed his back as they too sat down on the lawn under the night sky. “You should’ve told us that you wanted to tell her. We could’ve helped,” MJ said into the dark night. “She would’ve told you the same, you know.”

“What?” He looked up from the green grass. His head turning from MJ to Ned for reassurance, only to receive a nod from his best friend.

“She likes you a lot.”

“Like a lot lot,” Ned added in and nudged his friend.

Peter breathed in the night’s air. His heart beating a bit faster, not from anxiety anymore, but from joy. His tears dried out completely now, he only sniffled here and there.

“Okay then, what’s the plan?”

next