#also have just been too busy 2 be sad!!! have had 2 travel back 2 my hometown every single weekend 4 various events...

[rollercoasterwords]

hello rae!!!! how are you!!!! how's life!!!! did moving work out the way you wanted? how are you adjusting? sending u all the good vibes 💕

hi!! i'm good life has been. very busy but in fun ways mostly so!! moving did in fact work out the way i wanted--the first leg of the trip getting back 2 the u.s. was hell but actually moving from my hometown 2 the city where i'm living now went v smoothly bc i had a lot of help from family <3 & i am obsessed w my new apt quite frankly...actually got 2 decorate it the way i want it looks soooo good i got all my trinkets back & put so much art on the walls etc...also living in the same city as my sisters now which is GREAT i'm over at their place like every night using their kitchen eating their snacks watching scary movies together...things are finally settling enough now that i'm starting 2 feel a little homesick tho which </3 part of the experience of moving anywhere new but bittersweet all the same...

[hedgehog-moss]

Last time I went to the village to buy bread I saw a woman in the street who was dressed like a 19th-century peasant, complete with a thick old-timey accent with dialect words no one uses anymore—she was telling a little group of people to follow her so of course I had to drop everything and follow her too.

And it turned out she was a theatre actress who has read a lot of local archives in libraries and town halls, and offered her services to organise guided tours of various villages to tell people about local history in a fun way, by playing characters who lived here in the Middle Ages, the 19th century, or WWII. It's such a cool idea! I talked to her for a bit after the visit and she said she wasn't sure it'd work / attract enough people, but she had groups of tourists + local families show up for the visit every week, in every village where she did this, so she think she'll be hired again next summer.

When I joined their group she was talking about WWII, and how my & other nearby villages were known by the Nazis and Vichy as a hotbed of terrorists, with some Gestapo officers killed in bomb attacks. (In retaliation the Nazis eventually rounded up 100+ locals and deported them to camps, as well as shooting a few.) I was mostly familiar with WWII anecdotes from the North-East, where my grandparents lived during the war, and I found it funny how different they sounded—my grandfather made Resistance activities sound well-planned and careful (espionage, sabotage, underground presses, infiltrating railway services etc) while oral histories around here make them sound a lot more spontaneous and—handcrafted? like "Emile brought what we needed for the bomb in his wheelbarrow hidden under a layer of straw and we exploded 2 Nazis."

We then went to visit the former girls' school, and I learnt a lot about my country's history of education for girls! Also it was really sweet because there was an old lady in our group who had attended this school as a child and had lots of school memories to share. Most of them were very wholesome, until eventually our tour guide went "Surely you also have some School Mischief to tell us about" and the old woman at first was like no no no no, I was a good girl. And then she conceded that when she had to sort lentils for the nuns' dinner and she resented one of them for berating her in class, she'd do a shit job on purpose and leave some little stones in the lentils.

Then our last step was the fairground where the town fair was (and is still) held, and our tour guide told us little 19th-century anecdotes (in-character, more like acting them out) that she'd found in old postcards and letters in the archives—how the town fair was where you'd go for your dentist appointment (i.e. to have your bad teeth pulled with pliers with no pain medicine) and to get any object repaired, like damaged pans or clogs; how there were dancing bears and performing monkeys; how one year the merchant who sold linen for women's trousseaus had her linen display trampled "by 300 cows" (might have been an exaggeration) and she hit the cow herder and it started a massive brawl.

My favourite anecdote was how back in the 1800s the local innkeeper was frustrated by the fact that the nearest village is just 10km away, and people who came to the fair often decided to go spend the night there so their journey back the next day would be less long, and so he started to tell them about the beast that lives under the bridge between the two villages. Travellers say horses go mad when they see it and just jump into the water. Some say the beast has dug up corpses from the cemetery because it likes human flesh, though of course it prefers it fresh. I'm now convinced half of local legends were single-handedly created by business savvy innkeepers determined to get more customers than the rival inn 10km away.

I'm sad I only learnt about these visits at the end of summer when they're coming to an end, but I'll definitely follow this woman around again if she returns with more stories next year!

[gguk-n]

Max Unravelled

Unravelling Max's Mystery (Max Verstappen x Online Friend!Reader)

Series Masterlist

Summary- Max accidentally made an account on google plus in 2013. He came across a poetry page and enjoyed reading them. He ends up friends with the poet. He loved the normalcy she brought to his life. He didn't realise when the comfort he felt for her turned into love.

{Max's POV}

2013

I was searching for something on my gmail account when a pop up for google plus came through; without much thought I clicked on it. Some how, I'm yet to figure that out, I ended up with a google plus account. One of the few accounts I got recommended was a poetry and story account. They wrote very eloquently; I could feel the emotions in every word. I started reading all their posts in my spare time and even commenting on the ones I liked. I found my self constantly checking back to their page to see if they posted something. Their poetry was relatable and understandable. I hope they always have a good day since their words always pick me up when I'm down.

The poet I had been enjoying so much is a girl, and her name is Y/N. She's around my age; I guess that's why I related to her work so much. We spoke for the first time ever on her birthday. She made a post about it being her birthday so I wished her. She was sad about not being able to enjoy her birthday, I felt bad for her so we talked for a while until dad called me to practise. That was the start of our friendship. We ended up talking on google plus a lot. We shared the same sense of humour and best of all, she didn't know about racing. It was like a breath of fresh air to not talk about racing. She doesn't even seem interested in it; so I can live as Max for a while now.

My birthday was shit but talking to her made everything better. I can't believe I got excited about talking to someone and that someone made me feel good even on one of my shittiest days. She's one of the nicest people I've had the pleasure of talking to. I really do wanna talk to her on phone, typing everything I want to say out feels tedious.

2014

I've gotten busier since this year with Formula 3. We barely get to talk anymore. She did send me her number and we chat on Whatsapp whenever we can. But obviously it is not the same. I've suggested talking on call a few time and she finally agreed; I just need to find the perfect time to get away from everything to talk to her. I felt so nervous to talk to her for some reason, what if she thought I was weird and didn't enjoy talking to me? What if she heard me and decided I wasn't fun? What if we had nothing to talk about? I called her while sitting in my driver's room, she picked up quite quickly after 2 rings to be exact.

Max- Hi, Y/N! Y/N- Hey, Max!! How are you? Max- I'm good, what about you? Y/N- Yeah, I'm good too. haha!! This is so weird talking to you. Max- yeah, you sound pretty. Why would I say that? That sounds so fucking creepy, I face palmed myself so hard. Y/N- You sound nice too. I mean....you have a nice voice. Max- haha, thanks, this is the first time some one has said that. She thinks I have a nice voice, do I? Y/N- soooo, what have you been up too?? You've been so busy lately. I could hear people outside the driver's room. I quickly locked the door before answering her question. Max- yeah, I've been busy with stuff. I'll be done soon for a while now. Y/N- That's great I need my best friend back! Did she just call me her best friend? I've never had a best friend before.

We ended up talking on calls a lot more. I would have her contact ringer saved with a separate ringtone so that I would know to answer it. She usually called at reasonable times, where ever I travelled as if she knew my schedule.

2015

I got signed with RedBull Racing's junior team, making me the youngest driver. It was such a surreal feeling. But this also meant I couldn't talk to Y/N as much as I wished I could. Training and the races kept me very busy. But she was very understanding and would always welcome me back, no matter how long I was gone for.

2021

The first time I'm regretting not telling what I do to Y/N was today when I won my first World Championship. I was surrounded by my team, my girlfriend and my family as I got out of the car after I finished P1 at Abu Dhabi but it felt strange; like I was missing someone. I wish I could share this win, the biggest in my life yet, with the person who makes me feel so special yet so myself.

When I asked her about Formula One, she didn't know about, she didn't even know the prominent figures. So, I wasn't as worried about her finding out but I did worry now; since my win was controversial according to the media. However, she never asked. Was she really unaware or playing dumb? I wasn't sure if I should be grateful I get to be just Max or sad that I can't share a huge part of my life with my best friend.

2023

Y/N and I have been friends for the past 10 years. Time really flies. I've gotten a lot better at balancing my personal and work life. Y/N is my well kept secret; like I'm the only one who knows her. She moved out for college and we've only video called since. She is still funny and still writes. I think it's so cool of her to stay passionate about what she loves and keeping at it. She loves my cats more than I love them sometimes, she get's so excited when I send pictures of them. She says they cheer her up and that Jimmy and Sassy are her virtual pets. They loved her too honestly, they would always recognise when she was on call and jump into my lap or the phone to see or hear her. She still doesn't know what I did for a living; we've kept that a 'secret' you could say. But really I just didn't know how to tell her I was a Formula One driver and a 2 time World Champion.

Today was like any other day, I hadn't spoken to Y/N at all. Whenever I called her, I would usually close/lock the door depending on who was at home. My girlfriend didn't know about Y/N. I didn't even know how to bring it up, honestly. I sat down on my SimRacing chair after I switched the livestream off. Her phone rang for a few times and then stopped ringing but she didn't answer the call. I tried again thinking maybe she was busy or didn't hear it. I called a couple times before texting her; no reply. I was freaking out. This was the first time in 10 years that she hasn't answered my calls. She won't even reply to my messages. I found myself pacing around the house. The door to the room opened to my girlfriend's daughter standing in front of me, "Maxie, why are you walking in circles?" She asked after observing me for sometime. "It's nothing" I said, trying to calm myself down more than give a reply to her question. All these horrible thoughts swirled through my mind; what if she was in an accident and no one knows? What if she got robbed? What if she hurt herself and can't get help? What was I supposed to do? I didn't even know where she lived. I just couldn't think straight. My hair was a mess with how much I was running my fingers through it, a few stands coming along when I almost pulled them out of frustration.

After 7 hours, she replied to my text. I had almost given up hope, but she said that she was fine and that her phone was about to die. I felt relieved knowing that she was ok. But the text was so out of character for her. I texted her everyday after that in hope of talking to her. We always spoke everyday and it had been years since we didn't speak for so long. Almost every text was left on delivered. I had a race this weekend which I won and went out to celebrate with everyone because they wanted me to tag along. I didn't see the text Y/N sent me a while after the race since I was at the club. I only saw it when I got home. As soon as I saw it, I called her. She answered after a few rings.

Max- Schat, how have you been? Haven't heard a word from you in days. You could clearly hear the worry in my voice. Y/N- I've been busy, school year ending and stuff. Why didn't you sleep yet? Max- You know my sleep schedule is non existent. Y/N- Yeah, I guess I do. What did she mean by that? Her voice seemed hoarse, was she sick?Y/N- You know how I do freelance editing Max- You've told me about it Y/N- The latest author I'm working with is a sports author. I was hoping you could help me since you are a walking encycylopedia. Max- sure schat, but what's up with you? You know I'm always there for you Y/N- Yeah it nothing, just stressed. Max- Take off, you deserve it I wish she took care of herself instead of working so hard without breaks. Y/N- The summer break is here soon, I'll be fine. So about that author... Max-Yeah, what sport does she write for? Y/N- Formula One. I don't really like reading lengthy articles and I'm sure one article wouldn't do a sport any justice. I felt the ground slip from under my feet. My palms had gotten sweaty suddenly. Max- You did not go through google yet, right? (I stammered out) Y/N- Oh no, what do you take me for? I got excited to learn about something new. Do you know who the reigning champion is? I felt like I was about to lose everything. I didn't know what to say, my mouth was dry. No matter what I said, I don't think I could fix this situation. Y/N- Some dude named Max Verstappen. You guys share the same first name. He has 2 cats too; named Jimmy and Sassy, who look exactly like your bengals. I mean he even looks like you, with horrible sleep schedule just like you. He even sounds like you. There was horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach and my lungs felt like there was no air in them. Watching her tear up was the worst feeling.

Max- Schatje, I can explain. Y/N- You don't have to Max. I never asked you what you did. You don't have to explain anything. Max- I wanted to tell you, it just never came up in conversation. Y/N- I get it, it's difficult to tell your friend who has amounted to nothing that you are the World Driver's Champion, best of the best in Formula One. Max- Y/N, it's nothing like that. You're great, you're kind, you're funny. She laughed, but that stung my heart for the first time when her laugh was my favourite sound in the world. Y/N- Those are character traits I possess, they don't describe my career goals or achievements. I know I work 2 jobs to stay afloat while you make millions, I know I wish I was an author and not their editor, I know you probably thought I was too stupid to understand your rich and fancy world. Max- No, no, you're so talented. I've read your work and I'm sure the right publication will pick your work up. Y/N- I got rejected for the sixth time today. All of this is fine except that you lied to me about being single while having a girlfriend for years and having the happy family you dreamt off. You didn't have to introduce me to her; not like my boyfriends met you. But it would've been nice if I knew. Max- It just never came up. (I held my head in shame) Y/N- I...we joked about setting you up with someone all the time. Please don't. I get it, we didn't tell each other about work goals or what we did as a job but personal life; I literally told you about every guy I've ever been with. I felt bad telling you thinking you were single. I feel stupid right now. I wanted to reach out and wipe her tears but I couldn't. Max- I'm sorry,Y/N. I promise I won't hide anything anymore. Please, don't cry. Y/N- My name is Y/N Y/L/N. I majored in literature in Uni and now work as a primary school teacher and freelance editor. I'm trying to get my book published soon. I broke up with my boyfriend 2 months ago. This fucking hurt, everything she said and the way she said it. Max- Please don't do this. Y/N- I believe at least one of us should be honest. Max- Let me fix this. Y/N- Don't worry. There's nothing to fix. Max- Please don't say that. You mean a lot me. (I felt tears in my eyes.) Y/N- Me too. That's why, I need time. I'll talk to you when I'm ready. Max- Please, I can't lose you. I felt like my world was crashing. Y/N- You won't. I'll always be there for you. I just need time. Take care Max I was crying as she said it. Max- Bye, take care Y/N. I'll always be here. And the screen blacked out, I could see my reflection on the screen, tears streaming down my face.

After I was able to clear my head I texted her telling her that I would always be there for her and I would like to clear up the misunderstanding when she's ready. I spent the next few months thinking about her. It was starting to affect my relationship. I couldn't really give my girlfriend time when my mind was occupied with thoughts of Y/N. When my girlfriend brought it up how we were growing apart; I had a fight with her. I don't know what came over me, but not talking to Y/N or not knowing what was up with her was making it very difficult for me to focus on anything. The fighting became a constant after that. I didn't understand why she couldn't let me be. I missed my friend but she wouldn't get it.

I was SimRacing when Y/N's name popped up on my phone asking me to call her. I guess she was ready to talk it out. I really wished that this wasn't the end of our friendship. I really hoped that we could get over the misunderstanding and still be friends. I told the team I had some work and called her immediately. She answered like always; I waited for her to speak with baited breath. She started talking and we cleared everything up. I apologised for hiding the truth from her. I told her how much of a constant she was for me in my ever hectic life; how talking to her made everything better. She listened to me, I listened to her and then finally asked her to come to my home race. I wanted to meet her. I couldn't live knowing that I had the resources but didn't meet the one person that mattered to me the most. She was hesitant at first but I offered to get her the tickets and insisted on her joining me at the biggest race of the season for me and finally she agreed. I was over the moon. As soon as we ended the call, I sent her the tickets. I found myself counting down the days to the race for the first time.

I was waiting for her at the airport when she got here. My heart was beating very fast as I waited for her to come out. When I saw her; she was beautiful, shorter than I expected but she looked cute with her bag in one hand and a back pack on her shoulder, her hair in a low bun, a small smile graced her feature. I don't think I've noticed anyone with such detail ever before. Our conversation flowed easily. It didn't feel like it was the first time we were meeting. I dropped her at the hotel and went off to do media duty's at the paddock when I came back she was still asleep, traveling must've tired her out. She got dressed while I waited for her to get ready, even giving my 2 cents on what she should wear. She looked gorgeous, I couldn't help myself, staring at her. The black satin dress hugged her curves in all the right places. Her hair flowed down her back, the jewellery sparkling against her body. We went to have dinner at a fancy dutch restaurant. She loved the food especially the apple tart. The moan she let out as she devoured the dessert made blood rush downwards. I found my cheeks heating up, thankfully the whole place was dimly lit. We walked around for a while after the meal, she made fun of my name but I couldn't care less. I apologised and she accepted it and hugged me. Her arms were soft and the embrace warm. I found myself wrapping my arms around her, my face buried in her neck. I was scared I was gonna lose her, forever. I've never been scared to lose anything but a race until now and the thought of not having her in my life seemed scary. She consoled me and we headed back to the hotel.

The rest of the weekend was uneventful except for my girlfriend being pissed; she fought with about Y/N. I don't get what her problem is, she's just a friend I've known since forever. I'm just showing her around. I was giving interviews when I saw her talking to Lando, I saw them laughing along in the corner of my eye. It made me feel strange, there was this feeling in the pit of my stomach and I didn't like it. When I got back, Lando had left since it was his turn. She found Lando cute and it irked me, I was annoyed hearing her ask me to set her up with him. We got back to RedBull hospitality when my girlfriend asked me to talk to her, I left with her reluctantly leaving Y/N with Checo.

"Listen Max, I get it, she's your childhood friend and all, but it's so weird how she suddenly cropped up when I or for that matter any one knew nothing about her. People are saying stuff about us since she stepped on the paddock and the way you are dragging her along." my girlfriend spoke. "What are people saying? I will not stand any slander against her" I cut her off. She laughed dryly. "WOW, they are saying stuff about us, Max, us, that you are cheating on me with her. You've been so distant for months until a month ago, I didn't know what went wrong and you wouldn't talk either." she said running a hand through her hair. "It's nothing really. She just knows me as Max and not Max Verstappen and that's why I'm closer to her. Nothing more." I said. "It's pointless talking to you" she said turning around. "If we're done, I'm leaving, Y/N doesn't know anyone here except me." I said leaving for the door. She huffed before she followed me out. Y/N looked worried about what was going on between me and my girlfriend but I calmed her down and we spent the day together. She tagged along during quali too. I saw her praying before quali, it made my heart swell. I was starting pole and we spent the night watching a movie even though Y/N wanted me to rest before the race, I wanted to make the most of the little time we had.

Y/N hugged me before the race wishing me. I wanted to win so bad, I'd won here twice before but this was different. I wanted to win in front of her. I raced like a mad man and then I heard it. I crossed first and my happiness knew no bounds; knowing she was watching. I got out of the car and immediately ran to her; hugging her. It was cathartic. Y/N said my girlfriend looked annoyed, but I couldn't care less. I watched my girlfriend leave, annoyed. When I received the trophy at the top step of the podium knowing she was watching me from below made it so much more worth it. Y/N wanted to go out to celebrate my win and I wasn't one to say no. I went back to the hotel to get cleaned up and ready for the night.

I was greeted by my girlfriend in the room, it was dimly lit as she was sat at the corner of the bed with tears streaming down her face. "HOW COULD YOU DO THAT MAX?" she screamed at me. "Am I a fucking joke? I let it slide, you said you were friends but the first person you go to after winning your race was her, what do you think people were whispering when you did that?" she said in between sobs. I didn't get what she was saying. "Do you like her?" she asked. "What? We're friends" I stated. She shook her head, "No, Max, you aren't. The way she looks at you is how I look at you. The way you look at her" She cried, "You've never looked at me like that" she lamented. "It's nothing like that" I began. "You should've respected me at the very least and broken up with me if you liked someone else, I'm not gonna be some girl's place holder till you can have her." she cried out. "You're not a place holder for her" I said. "Feels exactly like that" she said wiping her tears. I felt nothing my 2 year long relationship might be ending and I didn't care. I didn't even try to correct her, did I really like her? Was Y/N really more important to me? "We're through Verstappen, if you can't even fight for us, I'm not about to fight for us" she sighed dejected. I walked towards the bathroom to wash up while she packed up to leave. When I got out she was gone. I went to pick Y/N up.

She kept asking me about my girlfriend but I never told her that we broke up. I didn't want her to feel responsible for my decision. At the club, she got close to everyone pretty quickly. She was unstoppable, downing one drink after another. I hadn't touched alcohol since I was driving. The others kept handing her drinks much to my dismay. She asked me to come dance with her but I had the others to look after too. She was busy dancing surrounded by too many guys, one of them going as far as to touch her and grind against her. All I saw was red, I bid the guys good bye and stormed the dance floor to drag a reluctant Y/N with me; I ended up carrying her out on my shoulder. She wasn't very happy, screaming and hitting me till I put her down. She puked as soon as I put her down and joked about missing my expensive car, I didn't really mind if she hadn't since she was more important than the car. I got her medicine and left them at her side after putting her to bed.

We spent the next few days after the race sight seeing. Y/N brought up my girlfriend a few time and I ended up avoiding her. When we were cuddling while watching Barbie I felt my heart beating out of my chest as she scooted closer to grab tissue. When her hand brushed against my skin, it burnt and a weird feeling erupted in my chest. She seemed completely unaware of how she was making me feel. We fell asleep on the couch that night.

I wasn't able to avoid the girlfriend question any longer and told her that we broke up without making any eye contact on the way to drop her to the airport. My eyes stung and there was a lump in my throat; I wasn't sure it was because of my girlfriend or Y/N. I bid her farewell, she would turn back towards me to wave after every few steps; my eyes were blurry after sometime trying to prevent the tears from falling. I ended up crying after she left.

All the races after, I ended up going shopping after or before every race to collect some trinkets or stuff that was special to that place and mailing it to her with small notes attached. She would graciously open them in front of me on video call; the smile she gave me the first time she received was unparalleled. It made my stomach turn over. I wanted to make her smile every chance I got. That's how I ended up sending her a package after every race from every country until I got reprimanded by her for the excessive amount of gifts. She asked me not to send one after every race and stick to one or two in total; I was forced to agree to that request.

We were planning on spending Christmas and New Year together; she wanted to leave after Christmas but I was able to convince her to stay until I had to leave for pre-season training. I couldn't wait for the season to end and to spend the year end with Y/N. We celebrated me winning the championship on video call; even though I had hoped she could be present in person but it wasn't possible with her schedule. This championship felt better than the last two since I was able to celebrate it with her. 2021 me wouldn't believe me right now.

Y/N flew in as soon as winter break started for her. I had cleaned up the house as much as possible. I had told my cats about Y/N visiting who seemed excited. I picked her up from the airport and when we got home the cats were very excited to meet her; a lot more receptive than the other guests I've had over. We spent the next few days going to places and the Monaco GP circuit. She cribbed about walking the entire time we walked the path. It made me laugh.

The night before Christmas we fell asleep on the couch cuddling; I hadn't slept this well in a very long time. When I woke up, Y/N was no where to be seen. I sat up waiting for her to return when she came back, she looked so cute in her jumper and shorts with her hair a mess. We opened up presents after some time. She had gotten me a Sid plushie, an ugly sweater and perfume. I got her a Formula One book with my face, a coffee mug and a pendant. I wanted to get her more stuff but I was sure she would make me return it if she saw every thing. I think the house would be over run with the amount of stuff I wanted to get her. Then she brought the matching sweater she got with me; I put it on immediately. I wanted to match with her all the time. We had a bit of back and forth on the dinner but agreed on Turkish kabab.

New Year came too quickly, which meant Y/N would be leaving soon. We went clubbing on New Year eve. She didn't drink like the last time we were at the club but made friends with some of the guys there. Having a social butterfly for a friend was a bad idea. We counted the time down to midnight as the clock struck 12 and I turned towards her to celebrate I saw she was kissing one of the guys she had befriended when we entered. If the club was quite you could hear my heart shatter. That's when I realised that all these weird feeling and all the times I couldn't stop thinking about her was because I liked her, no scratch that, I loved her. I felt my heart constrict when she turned towards me and hugged me later. I didn't want to talk about it, this would ruin our friendship.

All I could think about was how it felt to watch her kiss another man. I hated it, the worst feeling, worse than DNFing or not winning. I hated knowing another man could touch her and feel her. I wasn't even sure how to bring it up since what were we if not just friends. I put myself into training for the upcoming season but those feelings I felt when she kissed another man were still fresh in my head and I couldn't get rid of them even if I tried.

I was able to convince her to join me during her spring and summer break. We had fun, I loved having her waiting for me at the end of the race. I didn't really enjoy all the media questions that had cropped up about Y/N when she was seen with me, before or after the race. During my summer break, I spent it at her place. When I got there, it was a small apartment; but it had a homely feel. She would cook food for me and we would watch movies; I had a few commitments with the team and would leave for some time but then be back. It was so nice to have some one to come home to. When she was having her book launch, I went to meet her at her launch with a bouquet of flowers. "Congratulations" I said while handing her the flowers and giving her a hug. "Thank you" she replied, a smile playing on her lips. We had celebratory dinner after. Immediately after that, we were on the news. It read that I had a girlfriend, she kept apologising but it didn't matter. It made me a little warm, I'm not sure what emotions I felt hearing people speculate that she was my girlfriend.

I flew back to Netherland for the race early, she would only be joining me on the race day due to work. It dampened my mood but there wasn't much I could do about it. She flew in the morning of the race; it made my day watching her walk out of the airport. We talked all the way to the hotel where she got changed and we headed to the paddock. I had thought it through; after the qualifying, I had planned on telling her how I felt. I was gonna win this race and confess to her. Knowing that I can't hold her while someone else can was eating away at me and I wanted to take the chance before it slipped away from me.

I started the race P2 and finished it at P2. In the final laps, the only thoughts running through my head were, I really wanted to ask her out as a race winner, I can't do that now. She probably doesn't even like me like that, did I really want to ruin everything I had with her. I stumbled out of the car towards her, a big smile on her face. And suddenly I said it; "I wanted to ask you out as a race winner" emotions were running high. She insisted me to continue and when I did, she agreed to go out with me. I was over the moon, my head was reeling. This race ending was not what I hoped for but Y/N's answer was something I really was hoping for.

She waited for me in the driver's room. I couldn't help but not touch her. Her skin against mine send electric shocks through me, I couldn't help but smile at the feeling of her against me. I wanted to have this feeling for the rest of the life. I wanted to have her next to me; it took me a while to figure that out but now that I had, I didn't want to let go. I loved her and I wanted her.

We were both in the hotel room at the end of night in each other’s embrace, "Can't believe you're my boyfriend" she exclaimed. "Can't believe you're my girlfriend either." I exclaimed back. "I've liked you since I've known you" she mumbled. "What?" I asked shocked. "Yeah, I've always had a crush on you. Teenage me would lose it right now if she saw" she said. "I'm sorry it took me so long" I muttered pressing a kiss against her lips. "better late then never" she laughed wrapping her arms around my neck, flipping me to straddle my hips. She bent down to kiss me again.

I could spend the rest of my life like this, if it meant I could have her forever.

Hope you had fun. Thank you for enjoying the story!!

[faeriichaii]

hellooo, i love your writing could i please request angst to fluff where legolas is frustrated and busy he calls reader clingy so the reader sort of distances themselves? no rush ofc but keep up the amazing work 🫶🫶🫶

Words like Poison ~ Legolas x Elf!Reader

A/N: Hii!! Omg thank you so much <33 I haven't written anything with angst in such a long time so I am very very excited haha 🥰Also I hope you don't mind that reader is an elf :) Ngl I accidentally wrote like a bit of a different plot at first and like halfway through I was like 'no this is totally not the request??' So yeah haha I guess I did like 2 in 1 just that the other is only the start of smth and this is like a complete thing :)

⇢ ˗ˏˋ Warnings: fluff, lil bit angst ࿐ྂ ⇢ ˗ˏˋ Words: 1.1k ࿐ྂ ⇢ ˗ˏˋ Request: Yes (thank you <33) ࿐ྂ ⇢ ˗ˏˋ Meleth Nin ~ My Love ࿐ྂ

Summary: Your beloved prince is stressed and busy with his duties. So, when you approach him to try and lighten the mood, he lets his frustration out on you.

You were walking towards the library of Mirkwood, as you spotted a familiar head of white blonde hair entering said room. Legolas and you have known each other since your childhood. Both of you constantly playing with each other, weaving flower crowns or painting each other some pictures. Even as the two of you grew older, you never ceased to spend time together. Either reading a book or eating some fruits in the garden while enjoying the sun. Or reading about the history of Middle Earth, as well as chores you had to fulfil in your positions. Nothing could stop you two from being with each other and working through it together.

It was only natural that after a while your heart skipped a little more every time you saw him. The warmth that brushed your cheeks every time you two sat a little too close. Or the way the butterflies swirled around in your tummy when he looked at you with his beautiful captivating eyes. It didn’t take Legolas long to notice that your attitude towards him shifted. He also noticed how your smile made his day a little brighter than normal and how your laugh made his body feel warm and content with love.

So, at one beautiful spring evening he asked you if he could braid your hair and of course you obliged. Ever since then the bond between the both of you only strengthened. However, nowadays you rarely catch a glimpse of the elven prince. He was constantly hiding away either in the study room of his father, king Thranduil, or in the library. You haven’t even seen him in a week, so you decided to approach the library and try to find Legolas. Opening the wooden doors, you entered into the enormous room, filled with books and scrolls. Your eyes landed on your prince, who was sitting on one of the many tables. Books were piling up on the side. A smile formed on your lips as you approached him.

“Meleth Nin, I have been missing you.” You said gently, trying not to startle Legolas. His gaze quickly darted to you, before moving back to the book in front of him. “I am sorry, but I really am very busy at the moment.” He said, writing down into the notebook. “I know, but you have been working day and night and I barely got a moment with you.” Pulling out a chair, you sat beside him. Silence settled between the both of you. You pulled out your own book and read a few words, before your attention drifted back to the prince. “If you want to we could go-“ “(Y/N) stop whining around! I told you I was busy and I really can’t deal with your clingy attitude at the moment.” Your lips parted as you felt little cracks form into your heart. You tried to say something, anything, but nothing came out. The lump in your throat prevented you from uttering anything in your defence. Your eyes started to burn slightly as the words Legolas spat into your direction settled into your mind and travelled through your whole body, encasing you in utter sadness and discomfort. Quickly packing your book back into your bag you wiped away the few tears that spilled from your eyes. “I apologize your majesty. I will leave you to it.” No warmth was left in your voice as you turned around and quickly left the library, the soft mutter of your name from Legolas lips following you out.

Days passed and you haven’t seen the prince anywhere. Most of the day you spend cooped up in your chambers, reading or trying to fill the canvas with colour. However, your mind was too jumbled up to remember the sentences on the pages, neither could you focus on what to draw. A sigh left your lips as you decided to take a walk around the beautiful garden of Mirkwood. Walking along the stone path your fingers gently brushed against the petals of the Hortensia bush. Your heart still ached at the harsh words Legolas said and at the distance you tried to keep between the both of you. It was hard not constantly seeing him or sharing your experiences of the day with him. “Meleth Nin…” Your eyes widened as you noticed that Legolas suddenly stood in front of you. His gaze was filled with sadness, as he looked at you. “My prince.” Your tone was cold, as you tried to sidestep him. However, he had something else in mind as he gently grasped your wrist. “Please (Y/N) hear me out.” His hand moved lower from your wrist, in order to entangle his fingers with your own. “I am so sorry about what I said.” Your eyes locked with his own, as you got lost in the beautiful shimmer of them. “I should have never said that you were clingy. Meleth Nin, I love you.” His free hand grasped your cheek gently. Warmth spread from his touch through your body, your heart skipping a beat with glee. You missed Legolas. You missed him dearly.

“I can’t stand the silence between us. I can’t stand that we are apart more than just a few hours. My soul and heart belong to you and I ache for you every second we are apart. Please Meleth Nin, forgive me.” His forehead touched yours, as he leaned towards you. “I love you.” After these words left his lips, you leaned into him and gave him a kiss. Your hands held the back of his neck softly, while his moved from your face to your waist, holding you close. His lips were soft against yours. His touch was gentle, as he lets his finger trail from your waist to your back to pull you even closer. As if he was scared that you might slip through his grasp. “I love you Legolas. But please, never utter these words to me. You hurt me deeply.” You said, after the tow departed from your kiss.

“I will never say something like that to you again. I am sorry, really, I am. I just was so stressed and overwhelmed with the workload my father gave me.” A sigh left his lips, still holding onto you. You put a hand on his cheek, softly stroking his face with your thumb. He leaned into your touch. “I know it has been hard for you, but please tell me if something is going on next time.” A smile graced your lips, as the prince gently nodded before pulling you in for another loving kiss.  

[f1fantasys]

Always and Forever

Summary: You and Charles have a long history together. Will he finally come home to you?

A long, smutty, angsty Charles Leclerc imagine.

You had known Charles since the two of you were kids. You families we close friends, so naturally your childhood meant being around Charles a lot. From a very young age you knew you had a crush on Charles, who wouldn't? Your families had always been aware of yours' and Charles' blossoming relationship, but Charles always gently shut down the thought of you getting together, using the excuse that he was older than you (only by 2 years). You had remained close friends, and when Charles started traveling more and more due to F1, you also became close friends with his brother Arthur. Arthur had always known you craved Charles more than you let on, more than anyone else in the family. He was always the one to comfort you whenever Charles had shut you down, or whenever you saw a new girl on Charles' arms in every country he visited.

When you were 22, and Charles was 24, thriving in his career, things changed between the 2 of you.

The Leclerc family had invited you and yours to their house for the annual Christmas dinner. It was a lavish dinner with the fanciest foods and the most expensive wines. You made sure to dress as sexy as you could, hoping to make an impression on the one you love. Yes, you can easily say you are in love with Charles. You opted for a satin white dress that hugged all your curves in the right places. Your heels were a high as the sky. Your hair was curled and pinned in a way that made you look stunning and your makeup was simple yet beautiful. You know you looked like a million bucks. To give you a boost of confidence, you decided to forego any panties or a bra. You boobs held the dress perfectly, and you couldn't wait to see Charles' reaction. You were no more the young Y/N, too young for him. You were now a beautiful woman, ready to take her step into the world.

As you entered the Leclerc residence in the heart of Monaco, your eyes quickly searched for him. You hadn't seen him for 6 months, him busy with F1, and you had started a new internship that was in Nice.

You heard him before you saw him, but before you could react and even look around for him, someone pulled you and whisked you away to a quiet place.

'Arthur, what are you doing' you whispered.

Arthur looked at you with sad eyes, he looked scared to even say anything.

After a few seconds of raising your brows at him, he finally started -

'Y/N, maybe we should just ditch the party and go out somewhere. We can have a nice dinner and then hit up a club with some friends.'

Confused, you questioned him again. 'why would we do that? Your parents are throwing an amazing party so why would we just up and leave to go someplace else?'

'It's...it's..-' he stammered. 'Charles. He's here with a girl. Alex.'

Your heart started to heat faster. You didn't know what to make of that. You certainly weren't prepared to see another girl on Charles' arms tonight. Not when you haven't even spoken to him for a few months, and not when you made an effort to get noticed by him, only for him not even give you a second glace.

'That doesn't mean its ok for us to leave the party. Your mum would be very upset with us' you said.

Arthur continued to look at you with a worried face.

'I'll be okay' you lied.

He simply nodded his head and took your hand, leading you back to the living room where everyone was mingling.

As soon as you entered the room you eyes found his. He flashed you his signature smile, dimples showing, eyes crinkling. You felt your heart start to beat faster. Maybe you should have taken Arthur's offer to leave. You felt him squeeze you hand, to let you know he was there for you. And you were grateful for that.

Charles and who you assumed to be Alex, made their way over to where you were standing. 'Y/N' Charles sweetly said, kissing both your cheeks and pulling you into a hug. Your body felt frozen, out of place. This was your Charles, your friend first and foremost, yet you felt like you were meeting him for the first time. 'Charles, how are you?' you managed to smile. 'All well. Oh, this is Alex by the way' he said, looking at her like she was the most beautiful thing in the room. He wasn't wrong. She was beautiful. So beautiful in fact. Her slim figure wore a lovely dress and her long hair looked so soft. You managed another smile. 'It's lovely to meet you.' Charles turned to you 'and this is Y/N, one of my first best friends.' Alex kissed both your cheeks in greeting.

You spent the rest of of the evening mingling with different people. Family members of the Leclercs, friends, when finally Joris, a very good friend of both you and Charles found his way to you. 'All okay?' He asked.

'Yep, all good. Actually getting a bit tired. I have an early drive back to Nice tomorrow to fetch some of my stuff. My internship is over so I'll be back in Monaco for a while'

'That's great. It will be nice to have to back. I miss our catchups' he smiled.

Hearing him say that made you think of the memories you had growing up alongside him and Charles. You always had the best time with them. Only now you couldn't imagine making yourself available to tag alone with them, especially with Alex at Charles' side.

'I need some air,' you croaked out and walked away.

You made your way to the back garden, desperate for some fresh air to breathe. It felt like you were holding your breath the whole evening.

As soon as you stepped outside you immediately regretted it. There was Charles. With this tongue down Alexs' throat. Hand up her dress. You wanted to be sick. This was one thing you could have gone without seeing tonight. It all happened in a matter of seconds. You hoped they didn't hear your heals clanking on the bricks. But they did. Charles' eyes immediately widened at seeing you.

'Y/N' he smiled and let go of Alex. ' I was hoping we could spend some time together. I'd love for you Alex to get to know each other better.'

What was he playing at? He knew you had a 'crush' on him, so why the fuck would he want you and his girlfriend to be friends.

'Oh, sorry for interrupting, I was just one my way out' you muttered, hoping he would shut up and leave you. You started making a beeline for your car, when he ran after you.

'Y/N what is this. You hardly talk to me for months, you somewhat ignore me all evening, and then you don't even attempt to get to know Alex better.'

By now you were fuming. You were hurt for sure, but angry.

'I have a busy life too, you know. You're busy traveling around the world, but I'm not sat here waiting to message or call you every second of the day. You could have tried to contact me too. But it all makes sense now. Alex is keeping you even busier that you can't even check up on a friend or congratulate her for graduating and getting an internship.'

'Oh yeah, it all comes down to Alex.' He scoffed. What? That was what he took away from your whole rant?

'Why can't you just be happy for me that I found someone and I'm in love?'

You felt tears start to sting you eyes.

He continued 'At least i can keep a partner and not have them cheat on me'

That was a dagger to you heart. He knew how broken you were when your ex cheated on you, then broke up with you, as if you had done something wrong. Arthur was away at the time, so it was Charles who comforted you. To have him throw those words to you, you didn't know who he was anymore.

'I need to go' you whispered as you walked past him to your car and drove off.

It was so surprise that you struggled to sleep that night. Arthur had texted, asking where you disappeared to. You told him you wanted to get enough sleep before your drive to Nice tomorrow.

You thought back at the night. It definitely didn't go the way you thought it would. But more so you were disappointed in the way Charles was towards you. Where was the boy who made you laugh, who showed you an endless amount of respect, who gave you flutters of hope every time he smiled at you. Today he only broke your little heart.

As you were deep in thought, your phone lit up and the noise of a new message. Your heart skipped a beat at the name that popped up

'CLC'

'Y/N, i apologize for my behavior tonight. You did not deserve all those things I said to you. I hope you find it in you to forgive me.'

Just as you finished reading that text, another one popped up:

'And i wish I told you in person - you looked absolutely beautiful tonight....goodnight..x'

You heart skipped a heat at reading that and you couldn't help but smile to yourself.

'Thank you, Charles. Goodnight' was all you said back to him.

A few months had passed since that night. Charles was back to his traveling, and you'd exchanged a few texts here and there, and even Face-timed once after he won a race.

One Friday night in, alone at your house in Monaco, when your phone rang with an unknown caller ID.

'Hello?'

'Y/N.' You would recognize that voice anywhere

'Charles' you smiled. 'Are you ok? Why didn't you call me from your number?'

'I uh..forgot my phone at home. Yours was the only number i remembered. I'm out at a nightclub..I wondered if you are able to come and fetch me? I really need to talk to you.'

'Of course I'll come fetch you, but is everything ok?' you panicked. But secretly felt happy that he only remembered your number.

'Everything will be better when you're here' he said into the phone.

Not 15 minutes later and you were pulling into the nightclub he was at. You saw him sitting at the curb, surprised he wasn't with any friends or anyone. As you parked, you got out the car and made your way to him.

'Charles are you ok? Why are you sitting here alone? Have you been drinking?'

He smiled 'very little, can i drive?' he stood up and took the car keys from your hand. You followed him and sat in the passengers seat.

He started the car and backed out onto the street, you noticed he was going in the direction of his house.

The car ride was silent, until you started 'Hey, what's going on?'

He looked at you. His eyes bore into yours.

'Alex and I broke up'

Oh. Oh you weren't expecting that.

'Oh, im so sorry to hear that, Charles.' To be honest, you weren't sorry.

'I'm not' he said.

You didn't really know what to say back. It was silent for few more minutes until he started again:

'Breaking up with her made me realize something'

You looked to him, waiting for him to continue.

'It's you'

Wait what? What did he just say? What's 'you'?

'Y/N, I'm sorry. I've dragged you along for too long. Given you hope. False hope. Even though I was lying to myself. I've always had feelings for you. You're always going to be my annoying little best friend, but I couldn't help falling for you.'

I'm sorry, are you hearing this right? Charles is telling you he...likes you? What? You had no words, you weren't sure if you could even voice a word right now. So you stayed silent.

He parked the car at his apartment basement and turned his body towards you.

'I know this is a lot to take in right now. But i needed you to know. I've wanted to tell you since last summer, but never had the guts to. Too scared to hear you tell me you've moved on from me. But i cant hold it in anymore. I really really like you Y/N.'

You were shocked. All you could do was smile but then a doubt crept into your mind.

'if you've felt like this since summer, why did you start dating Alex for the most part of the year?' you asked. It just wasn't adding up for you.

He sighed. 'I started dating her to try and forget about you. I couldn't bring myself to tell you how i feel and be shut down by you, so i thought finding someone else was the solution. I tried to distance myself from you.'

You didn't know what to say. Charles took you hand and kissed your knuckles.

'I still want to be with you Charles. I don't think there will be a time where i don't want to be with you.' you smiled at him.

The pair of you quickly made your way to the elevator to get up to the apartment. Everything was happening quickly. Too quickly even. But you both were so caught up with everything that was said.

The two of you stepped into the elevator. Standing close together, but before the door could even close, Charles had pushed you against the wall. His lips ghosting over yours.

'Can I?' he asked.

You couldn't form a coherent thought or word to say. You simply nodded.

His lips crashed into yours. They were soft and plump, and tasted even more delicious than you ever imagined them to be. (and yes, you imagined what they would taste like....a lot). You both smiled into the kiss. It very quickly got heated. The both of you battling for dominance. In the end, Charles won, as you opened up your mouth to him. You felt him suck on your bottom lip, before his tongue slid into your mouth, and explored you as if there was gold to find. Eventually he pulled back when the elevator dinged. You smiled at each other and walked rather quickly to his door.

As soon as the door was shut behind you, Charles scooped you up and carried you to his bedroom. He lowered you to his bed and began peeling his shirt off. All you could do was stare. Sure you had seem him shirtless before, but this was a whole new ballgame. Charles was looking at you like you were the most precious thing in the world. But he also wore a smirk, that had you wrapped around his little finger.

You took that as a new found confidence, and slowly shimmied out of your dress, completely forgetting you were alone at home before he called, and you weren't wearing any underwear.

Charles' eyes widened and you gasped, but quickly his eyes darkened, and all you could see was lust. Lust for you.

He pulled you flush against himself 'so fucking beautiful, i don't know why i waited this long to see you like this'

You felt a blush creep up your cheeks at his words. The two of you started kissing again. A dirty, sloppy kiss with teeth and tongues clashing. He moved down to your neck and very quickly found your sweet spot. That earned him the sexiest moan from you. 'Fuck' he muttered. He gently laid you down on his mattress and opened your legs up. You should have felt conscious, him staring into your most private parts, but you didn't. If anything, you felted so turned on. You'd dreamt about moments like this. To have your Charles look at your like this.

He started kissing a path up your thighs. Too slow for your liking. He was teasing you, and you both knew it. You moaned 'Charles please' and he smirked. He very quickly realized he would never tire of hearing you beg for him.

Suddenly without warning, his tongue licked a strip up your cunt. You were speechless, you couldn't even breathe properly. In no time he found your clit, sucking and pulling at it with this mouth, earning more and more moans from you. This is what you call eating your girl out. He was a professional. If it were an Olympic sport, he would win gold. Double gold even. The feeling was incredible. The noises in the room were obscene. All it took was a few minutes until you came crashing down. Charles made sure to lick up all of your warm juices, leaving nothing behind.

'So delicious Mon amour'

The nickname made your heart flutter. You grabbed his hair gentle and bought his face up to yours to kiss him. You could still taste your saltiness in his mouth. While kissing, you felt his fingers find your pussy. He slowly started rubbing circles on your clit. He kept getting close to your entrance, then moved his fingers further away. You gave him a groan 'Charles' you said breathlessly. ''What do you want Y/N.' He was smirking again.

He continued his movements, but still didn't give you what you wanted. You continued to groan, getting so worked up. 'You need to tell me what you want Y/N' Fuck this man is going to be the end of you, and is he really making you beg after making you wait practically your whole life for this day?

'Finger Charles, use your fingers, fuck'

And without a second thought the thrust two fingers at once. You both moaned in unison. You at the incredible feeling of his fingers hitting the right spots, him at the how tight you were.

You came a second and third time. Breathless, yet still needing more. You needed to feel him. In your mouth and in your cunt.

You slowly pushed him onto his back and climbed onto of him.

He took your boobs into his hands and started massaging them and pinching your pebbled nipples. 'Fuck Charles' you said as you felt him bring his lips closer and quickly take your one nipple into his mouth while he still played with the other. Once he had enough time with your boobs, you shimmied you way down his body and peeled off his jeans and boxers. His cock sprang free, smacking his stomach. He looked so painfully hard. But oh so beautiful.

'My turn to taste you' you cooed. Charles flashes you his signature smile with his dimples. 'You don't have to-' 'I want to' you interrupted him.

You took him in your hands. No surprise he was thick. And long. And there was a vein at the side that made everything that much hotter. What Charles did next sent a jolt of electricity to your core. He bent forward and let his spit dangle from his mouth down to his dick. If you weren't horny before, you definitely were now. You'd never seen anything hotter in your 24 and a half years on earth. 'Fuck me' you muttered. 'Well, that is the plan' he replied.

You lowered you mouth to take his cock inside it. Obviously, you couldn't fit all of him in, so your hand took care of the rest. You slowly licked a stripe up his shaft and suck the tip of him into your mouth. His pre-cum was already so delicious, you couldn't wait to get more.

'Hmm' you looked up to see his eyes roll to the back of his head, as he pulled your hair out of your face and held it behind your head.

'Fuck Y/N, you take me so well. You're fucking amazing at this' he muttered as you started to bob your head up and down, gagging slightly as you felt him reach the back of your throat.

'Fuck, im close Y/N'

'Come for me Charles, let go for me' and with that you tasted him. Salty and warm, and oh so delicious.

He bought you up to sit on his lap again, kissing you again for what felt like hours. Until he heard his phone ringing. Whining, you climbed off him so he could take the call. It was Arthur, you heard him speak in french 'Charles? Do you know where Y/N is? I've tried calling and texting her but she's not answering.' 'Charles had to keep a giggle in. I saw her at the club earlier, she said she was spending the night at her friends.' They're probably already sleeping, they got quite drunk' he said while sending you a wink. 'Ah okay' said Arthur, 'I wanted to invite her for Charlottes' birthday lunch tomorrow, you're coming right? It will just be the 4 of us and Enzo.' Yes, we''l be there...I mean..I'll be there' Charles said holding in a laugh. 'Great, see you tomorrow' Arthur said as he ended the call.

'How am i going to be in the same room as you and keep my hands to myself?' Charles said quickly. You could only laugh as he pulled you back into his lap, resuming his activities of kissing you as deep as he could.

You started to grind on him, and when you heard a string of french words leave him mouth, you finally, finally lifted yourself up and sank down on him. It felt like you were made for each other. He filled you so perfectly. You mind went blank, all you could think about was your Charles, finally coming home to you. He started meeting you halfway, lifting himself up and thrusting into you, as hard as he could. The room was filled more obscene noises, pants, breath, moans and swear words from the both of you. 'M close, Charles' you managed to say.

He quickly found your clit with his fingers and within seconds you came for a 4th time in one night. Your bundle of nerves were so sensitive, but you still couldn't get enough of him.

He slid out of you and switched positions. This time you were on all fours, and he slammed into you with no warning. 'Fuck, so tight, so fucking tight me ma belle' he panted.

'Charles, i'm close' you muttered, surprised your 5th orgasm was rolling around so quickly.

'Wait for me cherie' he said as he fucked harder and harder into you. By know you legs were shaking, and he had to hold you upright to balance you. You could feel his hot breath on your neck and in unison, you both came undone.

You both stayed in that position for a while, catching your breaths, until he slowly slid out of you causing the two of you to let out a groan. He quickly ran to his bathroom and came back with a warm cloth and wiped you down, leaving you feather kisses all over.

When he returned again, he climbed into the bed beside you can pulled you to his side. 'I know everything is happening rather quickly, but Y/N i want you to know i am serious about you. I've known you for a very long time and every single part of your being, inside and out, is incredible. I love you.'

You eyes started tearing up upon hearing that. You've wanted to hear those words since you found out what a 'crush' is or what 'feelings' are. You snuggled closer to him and kissed his nose. 'I love you too Charlie.' You fell asleep in each others arms.

The next morning you woke up slightly confused with where you were. Until the memories came crashing down. You tried to hide your smile before turning around in the strong arms that were around you. He was still asleep, slightly snoring. He looked as beautiful as ever, and you couldn’t believe he was yours. You took in his appearance. He had a soft smile, dimples peaking out, a good tan and the hottest jawline ever. You quickly pecked his nose as he started shuffling. His eyes flew open and within a second those dimples came to life. He gave you the biggest boyish grin and pulled you impossibly closer.

‘Good morning mom amour’ he whispered.

‘Good morning my love’

‘We’ve got lunch with the family today, care to join?’ He said, wiggling his eyebrows.

You threw him a genuine smile, secretly hoping more days like this would come.

Instead of saying anything, you kissed him. Hard and deep, and he kissed you back. He rolled onto you and removed your (his) tshirt.

Charles started meddling with your boobs, pinching your nipples and earning a moan from you.

‘I’ll never get tired of hearing that my love. It’s so fucking sexy’

To hear him say than in his raspy morning voice turned you on even more. Yes, you definitely were sensitive from last night, but you craved so much more.

Before you could continue, an idea popped into Charles’ head. He suddenly stopped his movements and swiftly removed himself from on top of you, got up and walked to the bathroom, stripping his boxers on the way. Shocked, you looked on. What is he doing you thought. He popped his head out a few seconds later.

‘Coming? Or non’.

You’ve never got out of bed faster than right now.

He had the shower turned on and once the water was nice and hot, you both stepped in. He started to shampoo your silky hair, massaging you, earning moans from you. You did the same to him in return. Suddenly your back hit the cold tiles and Charles knelt down in front of you, opening your legs. You held onto his hair, knowing what was coming. Only it wasn’t what you expected. You thought his mouth would be on you. But he angled the shower head to your most sensitive parts. You gasped as you felt the water spray on your clit. Charles gave you his signature smirk before adding his tongue, AND FINGERS to the mix.

You mind could form no coherent thoughts. You could barely hold your body up. Luckily Charles and his strong arms held you in place. He soon placed the shower head back in place and added two more fingers to you.

‘Y/N you look so fucking hot right now. Definitely a sight for sore eyes’

All you could do was nod.

As Charles felt you getting close, he stood up and replaced his fingers with his painfully hard cock. The stretch was a bit of a sting at first, but when he started pumping in and out of you, the pleasure made it all worth it. He was fucking into you harder than you’d ever had it before.

‘Fuck, Charles’ was all you could say. ‘Fuck fuck fuck’

He smiled, ‘I am fucking you mon amour. You’re taking me so well. So tight and needy for my thick dick’ he muttered, almost to himself.

Within minutes your legs were shaking and your warm cum released from you. You wanted to taste him again, so as soon as you knew he was close, you made him slide out of you and you got on your knees. Taking him as deep into your mouth as you could. Pumping what you couldn’t fit with your hands, and massaging his balls. No sooner than I minute later you could taste his deliciousness and he moaned and praised you for your activities.

You stood up and kissed him again. You could kiss him forever, as you felt his hands massaging your ass.

‘Charles I really am sore now, no more sex for a loooong while’ you said.

He laughed ‘as if. Let’s see who breaks first’

‘Is that a challenge? Let’s see who can’t keep their hands off the other at lunch later’ you wiggled your eyebrows at him.

‘Deal' he said with a smirk.

You needed to go home to change since it was already 11.30 and the lunch was for 12.15. You'd decided with Charles that he would drive the pair of you to the lunch. And if anyone raises eyebrows at the fact you came together, he would say you talked about it at the club last night.

You opted for mini summer dress that ended just above your knees, and paired it with a pair of wedges. Charles wore a simple white cotton button up and some shorts - it was just a casual lunch, nothing fancy.

As he parked the car at the restaurant, he turned to you and stopped your movements of getting out of the car. The next thing you felt were his lips on yours surely leaving a bruise. It was hard and rough, his tongue exploring your mouth once again.

Breathlessly, you both pulled away, smiling at each other.

'Just needed something to keep me going through lunch, since i can't even touch you, and until i get you back home to ruin you all over again' he said.

You felt your cheeks get red and you heart beat faster. Not knowing what you say, you smiled and sent him a wink, before climbing out of his pista.

Walking up to the table, everyone's eyes was on the two of you.

'Did you guys come together?' Lorezno asked.

'Yep,' you said, looking at Charles who had his shades on, the sneaky bugger.

'We saw each other at the club last night and decided to come together' he said back.

'Okay, Y/N, where have you been? You hair looks like its just been through a room full of fans' Arthur said, showing you a smirk. He knew something fishy was going on.

'Oh i had the window down in the pista, thats it' you said back.

Of course the only two chairs that were left were next to eachother, which meant the lunch would be 10x more difficult for you to keep your hands away from him.

'Happy Birthday Charlotte', you said kissing her cheeks and gifting her a stunning bouquet of flowers. 'I hope Enzo is spoiling you today,' you said sending a wink to Enzo.

So far the lunch was going well. Everyone was in conversation with each other and it was nice to catch up with Charlotte after a long time. The food and drinks were flowing nicely.

Nicely, until you felt somebody's hand creep up your legs, almost touching your most sensitive parts. You jumped in surprise, and started coughing, having to blame your wine go down the wrong hole. As you settled down again, it came back. This time you had to keep your blush at bay, and you sent Charles a pleading look. All he did was smirk at you, before removing his hand.

Two can play at the game you thought, as you sneakily bought you hand to rest on his bulge, feeling his dick grow hard as rock under your touch. He could barely even concentrate on what Arthur was saying, let alone engage in the conversation.

When he was sure no one was looking, he bought his lips to your ear and said 'behave, mon amour, or you'll be sorry later'

Just the thought of later caused you to squeeze your thighs shut together to release the ache between them.

'We're thinking of taking the yacht out after lunch, to watch the sunset. Care to join?' Enzo said looking at you and Charles.

You wanted to say no. To say you had someplace else to be. But they would surely notice Charles missing as well.

'Of course' you replied, while Charles gave you an annoyed look.

Some time later, all of you were out on the yacht. It was a beautiful day to be out on the waters, and you were glad you decided to come. Although you also wish you were tucked away in yours' or Charles' apartment with him inside you. Thinking about that only turned you on, and for the past 30 minutes you were having difficulty focusing on anything other than Charles and his fingers and his tongue and his dick.

A few more friends had joined your group, and Charles was currently sitting opposite you, sending what you could only describe as heart eyes in you direction. You tried to tell him to stop, but he wouldn't.

The sun was set and the sky was getting darker. Some were in the water enjoying the coolness of the water while others were just lounging around.

You decided you need some air, so you went to the other side of the boat and climbed to the bottom of the steps where the boat met the water, and dunked your feet in. It was nice and relaxing, until someone decided to join you.

'Having fun? Or would you rather be fucking' he smirked at you.

'Oh my god Charles' you whispered. 'You cant say things like that out loud. And get away from here. Its hard not being able to jump you as it is'

'Relax, amour. Everyone is in the water on the other side of the boat' he said as he slowly got into the water himself, and settled between you legs.

The last 24 hours had honestly been a dream Everything you've ever wanted had come true and you couldn't be happier.

'Are you ok, love?' Charles asked as he caught you deep in thought.

All you could do was smile and lean forward, bringing your lips to his.

It was a gentle kiss. Not heated like before. Just a gentle embrace between two people who love each other.

'i love you'' he whispered

'I love you too, my Charlie'

Things quickly took a turn as he started to slide your bikini bottoms down from under your dress.

Before you could process what was happening or worry about the others, you felt Charles gently push into you. To say the feeling was incredible was an understand.

'Fuck, mon cherie' he whispered. 'You feel so good' he said as he started to set a faster pace. You braced yourself, holding onto his shoulders, playing with his hair, moaning into his ear. Trying to be as quiet as you could.

Nothing was gentle anymore. Charles was slamming into you. Fucking into your cunt. Hitting all the right places.

'Charles' you moaned. 'I'm close'. 'Let go princess, but be quiet, unless you want the others to find me fucking you here' he whispered, smiling at you.

'Fuck' was all you could say. You were incredibly sore but you couldn't get enough at the same time.

Within minutes you reached your peak. It was so intense that you couldn't hold yourself together. Charles literally had to carry you into the water, to support you, as well as chase his own high.

'Merde' he gasped as you finally felt him splutter into you.

'You are so amazing, I cant get enough of you' he whispered as he peppered your face in open-mouthed kisses.

You could hear some voices getting closer to where the two of you were, so you quickly separated yourself from Charles and sat back on the step.

'Oooooh, whats going on here?' Arthur and Charlotte said as the approached you and Charles.

'Nothing, just chilling' you said, although your feet were inside of Charles shorts, playing with his willy, but the others' couldn't see that

Arthur gave you raised eyebrows. 'ooookay, well we are heading back now, just wanted to let you know. As he turned on his heel and pulled a confused Charlotte behind him.

'He so knows we're fucking. He knows me too well. And he knows you' you told Charles as he started getting out of the water.

He suddenly gave you a shocked look.

'What?' you almost jumped up because of the way he was looking at you.

'I took your bikini bottoms off of you and i think i let them go in the water' he said, barely holding in his laughter.

'Oh my god Charles, im wearing an almost see-through dress, and that was my favorite bikini' you said pouting.

'I'll buy you a new one amour. and wrap my towel around you. Whatever is under that dress is only to be seen by me, no one else' he said as he helped you on your feet and guided you back towards where the others were.

'Need a ride home?' Arthur asked you quietly. You felt your cheeks heating up. How could you say no without giving away the fact that your were fucking his brother?

'Um-' you started, but Charles quickly interrupted you.

'Y/N, do you still need me to take a look at the thing wrong with your car?'

Life saver.

'Yes please, if you don't mind.'

You looked at Arthur. All he did was smile and mutter 'okay'

'Thanks for the save''' you giggled to Charles as you both got settled in his pista again.

'No problem, babes'

You made a face. You weren't used to being called babes, or babe, especially by Charles, so to hear him say that made you wet. So wet. As if you've had a dry spell for the last 24 hours.

There was a sudden shift in the mood on the way back to your apartment.

'What's got you thinking so hard' you asked as you observed Charles.

He smiled a gentle smile. 'I know everything is happening really quickly, and I wouldn't change it for the world.. But i've realised i dont want to be away from you. At all times. I know that sounds crazy, because i travel so much, and although i would love for you to join me at every race, I can't expect you to leave home and work all the time. Don't get me wrong, i would gladly have you with me 24/7 if it’s something you wanted’ he paused. You waited for him to continue.

He looked at your with eyes that held so much love ‘join me for the triple header.’

You kept silent, rewarding him with a smile.

‘We just got together, and I don’t think I can go 3 whole weeks without seeing you’ he whispered.

‘Charles, I’d love to’ you gushed. Leaning forward and pecking his cheek as he showed you a full dimpled smile.

‘Mom amour’ he said softly, almost to himself.

Two days later (and A LOT of sex later) you and Charles were on a private plane to Austin. Arthur had joined you as well. You nor Charles had told him anything, just the shit-eating grin he had told you both that he knew everything.

As Charles had drifted off to sleep on the long flight, Arthur came to sit next to you.

‘Y/N, I am so happy that you finally got what you wanted. I don’t know how it happened’ he made a face ‘nor do I want to know’ he winked ‘but I’m happy. For the both of you.’ He spoke in French.

‘Thank you Arthur, and thank you for always standing by me. I appreciate you’ you said as your hugged him.

You’d arrived in Austin the day before media activities were to take place. Charles told you he wanted to take you out for an ‘Official first date’ in his words.

He wouldn’t tell you where he was talking you - all he said was ‘dress smart, as you always do’.

This time, you opted for a midi black dress that had a sexy slit on the side. You paired it with a stunning pair of black heels and decided on an up-do for your hair.

As Charles waited for you in the living room of your suite, he nearly choked on his breathe upon seeing you.

‘You know, maybe we should skip dinner. Just go straight to dessert’ he cussed in French as he approached you.

‘Charles! No. I’m very hungry and you owe me a ‘date’’ you told him.

‘Fine, but I might get arrested for public indecency’ he scoffed behind you as your closed your hotel door.

Of course, he rented a Ferrari for your time in Austin. As you settled in the car, his left hand graced your thigh the whole way to the restaurant. He tried, but failed, to get his fingers to enter your lacy panties.

Dinner was amazing. He really picked well. You chatted about everything and nothing at the same time.

Just as your were finishing actual dessert, an idea popped into your head. You excused yourself to go to the bathroom.

You don’t know where the confidence came from, you quickly removed your panties and scrunched them up in your hand. You topped up on your lipstick, and walked back to Charles with some swagger. He smiled as he saw you approach him. You held out your hand as he opened his to take what you were giving him.

When he checked what you gave him, his eyes widened in surprise.

‘Merde’ he muttered. You quickly noticed he was very ansty from then on. Mission accomplished, you thought to yourself.

Needless to say, Charles couldn’t wait to get back to the hotel. He fucked you in the car. Or rather- he made you ride him. It’s safe to say it was the hottest sex the two of you had had til today. The way his dick filled you up was no joke, especially with the limited space to move around. You were flush against him. Your nipple was in his mouth. His fingers were playing your clit. You were pulling his hair, surely leaving marks on his neck. It was hot. You moaned in unison as you came while he still slammed his thick cock into you. A few seconds later ‘fuck Y/N I’m cuming’

You stayed in your positions as you both caught your breathe. Gently kissing each other. Just as your lifted yourself up to let Charles pull out, he ordered you to open your mouth.

‘Open your pretty mouth Cherie’ he whispered. But not softly. It was harsh. You did as you were told, as Charles let his spit dangle from his mouth down into yours. The things this man comes up with. He is incredible.

Back at the hotel, you came a second, third and fourth time. This time though, not only from his cock, but from his tongue, fingers and wait for it-the shower head combo again.

Austin was an amazing race for Charles, and so was Mexico. It all came down to Brazil.

As you entered the paddock with Charles (not as a couple, yet) you couldn’t help but feel excited.

That quickly changed as you both entered the Ferrari garage and saw a familiar face. One you hoped you wouldn’t see so soon. You froze next to Charles, as you felt his face keep switching between you and the woman before you. She came up to you both and hugged him. But what caused you to shiver was the way her fingers ruffled through his hair. And he let her. You just looked at he both of them. It was like he forgot you were right beside him or something.

‘Y/N’ he started but before he could continue, you walked away. You needed some air. What is his ex doing here. Why did he let her touch him like that.

You walked through the paddock until you found a secluded area that hardly had any people. You sat down and tried to calm your breathing.

Maybe you read the whole situation. Maybe he was playing a game with you. But at the same time, he told you he loved you.

You stayed away for the remainder of the day. Charles and Arthur had called you multiple times but you told them you just need space as you returned to the hotel.

Quality was a disaster for Charles. He was started P10 for the race. You didn’t want to add to his problems because you knew he would be beating himself up for doing so bad, but at the same time your life and relationship was no joke.

He walked into your room around 7pm to find you sitting on the couch staring at the tv. He could tell you had being crying.

‘Y/N, please let me explain. What you saw was nothing. I don’t even know why or how she even was there. I guess I didn’t pull away because I was just as shocked as you were. But please believe me there is absolutely nothing going on between us. The last time I spoke to her was two weeks before we got together. I love you and only you. No-one can tell you otherwise’ he said as he sat next to you and took your hand into his.

You felt him wipe away a few tears you didn’t know were even falling.

He took your face in your hands and gentle caressed it.

‘I’m sorry if I over-reacted, but it was so hard to see the two of your together again. You sobbed into him and he hugged you.

‘And I’m sorry I caused you more stress, for not doing well in quail’

‘Whatever’ he said. ‘You will always be first’ he kissed your forehead.

Tonight was the first night since you got together that you hadn’t had some sexual activities with Charles. You just cuddled and fell asleep in each other’s arms.

The next few weeks went in a blur. Things were good with Charles, and before you knew it, it was time for the Leclerc's annual Christmas party again.

As you walked into their house hand in hand, you couldn't help but think back to a year ago. You were still pining over Charles, and he was pining over someone else. But that was then. This time, you were still pining for him, but he was yours, and finally, he was actually pining for you.

He took you up to his childhood bedroom before attacking your lips with his.

'Char,' you tried to say but he quickly swallowed your words by sticking his tongue down your throat.

'Shhhh, lets just be in the moment,' he said as he started to unzip your dress from the back.

You shimmied out of it while he got rid of his own clothes. He was not surprised to find out without any underwear.

'My girl' he smiled as he carried you to his bed and gently laid you down.

He opened your legs to find you like Niagra Falls. Juices already spilling out of you.

Confused, he looked at you.

'Are you already this wet, for me?'

'I'm always wet for you Char, you just found out sooner rather than later tonight'

He flashed you his dimpled-smile.

'I love you, and your juice, baby'

You didn't have time to say it back. He attacked your pussy with his lips. Licking and sucking, eventually sinking two fingers.

'Oh Charles, yes' you panted as you grabbed onto his bed sheets , trying to suppress your moans so no-one would hear what the two of you were up to. He continued his slaughter until you were practically shaking and whimpering underneath him.

'Fuck me' was all you could say as he bought his lips up to yours, pulling you in for a messy kiss. Cum and spit certainty ruining your makeup.

'That's the plan, amour' he said as you rolled him over so now your ass was sitting his obnoxiously large dick. You made out with him some more until you couldn't take it anymore. You needed to feel him in you.

You didn't even take off his pants or boxers properly - you practically pulled his dick out and wasting to time, you sank down on him.

Groaning in unison, Charles sat up and moved the two of you to the end of the bed. His mouth latched onto your boobs while he met up halfway to fuck into you. Once again, the room was filled with obscene sounds - bodies slamming into each other. Juices squeezes between the two of you, Charles' mouth sucking on your nipples, you panting and trying to catch a breath, moaning, and a splutter of french curses leaving his mouth.

Just as you were reaching you high, both your bodies' froze.

''Charles,' his mother knocked on his door. 'Are you inside?' she asked.

As much as you wanted , no needed, to moan, you couldn't hold back a giggle into Charles' neck.

'Yes maman, I'll be down just now' he tried, hoping she would leave.

But of course, she didn't.

'I really need to talk to you, I'm coming in' he said, oblivious to the fact that her son was fucking into his childhood friend-now girlfriend- like there was no tomorrow.

'NO! maman' but it was too late.

She walked in, to find you sat on her childs' lap, boobs in his face, while Charles looked at her with wide eyes. You, you couldn't find the courage to look back at her, so you simply hid your face in Charles' neck.

The room was silent for two seconds until Pascale finally came to terms to what she walked in on'.

'Oh my god, Charles, OH MY GOD Ý/N' she shut her eyes. 'I didn't see anything, I didn't see anything' she all but screamed, while Charles was still in pure shock, neither of you comprehending what was happening.

'Oh wow, I've waited for this day for so long. Oh no, not like that. I mean I've waited for the two of you to FINALLY accept your love for one another.' You and Charles both stayed silent. What is happening right now?

'When neither of you said anything, again, Pascale whispered, rather loudly, ' You know I think I'm gonna go now. I'll leave you two. But please don'' be long, we've got a dinner to host.' and with that she closed the door.

'Fuck me'

'I....wow. I have no words' he stared at you, heart still racing from getting caught.

You laughed into his shoulder.

Slowly, he started a good rhythm again.

'Fuck, Y/N, you don't know what you do to me' he said through gritted teeth, still making you bounce up and done his shaft.

'Char I'm close, please' you moaned into his ear as his thumb found your clit and started rubbing circles and within seconds you came undone, walls clenching around his dick.

'Merde' he all but shouted as he felt himself spill into you, both your bodies shaking from the high.

You slowly felt your movements come to a halt. Content to just give yourselves a few minutes to come back to earth.

Little giggles filled the air as you both recounted the events of the last 20 or so minutes.

'I don't know how I'm gonna look at your mum again' you shyly told Charles.

'I don't know how the fuck I'm going to. I really hope she hasn't told anyone what she walked in on. We'd never hear the end of it' he said giggling back to you.

You quickly cleaned yourselves up and made yourselves look presentable again.

Hand in hand you walked back downstairs, just in time for the arrival of the other dinner guests. You parents included.

Pascale just smiled at you and Charles whenever she made eye contact with the two of you.

The evening was filled with good food, good wine, dancing and a lot of curious eyes.

As the night was coming to an end, you and Charles bid farewell to everyone and drove off in his pista.

'Well that was an eventful evening' you cooed to him.

The roads were quiet at this time of the night-or early morning. He stopped at the side of the road and got out of the car.

He walked around your side and helped you out the pista. You took a short walk to the edge of the hill, and overlooked Monaco-how beautiful she looked all lit up.

'It's beautiful' you whispered, more to yourself, as Charles wrapped his arms around you from behind.

'It is, not more beautiful than you though, mon amour' he said as he kissed your cheek.

You smiled as you held onto his hands and squeezed them.

'Move in with me' he suddenly said. We already spend almost ALL of our time together, either at your place or mine, so why not make it permanent' he said, kissing your cheek again.

You couldn't smile a bigger smile.

'Char, I'd love that' you said, turning around so you could give him a proper kiss this time. Nothing sexual, just pure love. You ended sitting on a near by bench, just basking in each others presence and the love you had for one-another.

Things had progressed well from then-on.

You'd moved in with Charles, graced each and every corner of his apartment with unbelievably good sex, attended as many races as you could. And before you know it your one year anniversary was coming up, when you'd be in Belgium for the GP.

You were due to join Charles in Belgium in a few days.

But today you woke up feeling man down. You met Carmen, George's girlfriend for lunch but halfway through you had to excuse yourself to go to the bathroom and be sick.

Must be something you ate, you thought.

Wrong.

You were so wrong.

Carmen lightly suggested you take a pregnancy test, then it hit you. It was no secret that you and Charles had A LOT of sex. A lot of unprotected sex. You were both clean, and you were on birth control. But you should have realized sooner that its not always going to do its job to the max, especially with the amount you fucked. And now that you think out it, you have been feeling low of energy the whole week.

'Shit' you muttered to yourself. You and Charles hadn't really talked about when you'd have kids. It was more of a 'yes, we definitely want kids, in the future.' Not near future.

Carmen drove you to the pharmacy and picked up a few different brands of tests just to make sure they were consistent. Back home, she waited for you in the lounge, while you took the tests.

By now you were hyperventilating. What if they come out to be positive and Charles doesn't want it at this point of his life? What if he pushes you away too?

'Okay, calm down,' you told yourself. 'You'll be okay. You and Charles will be okay' you whispered.

You peed on the 3 sticks, and then came the waiting game. It felt like time was frozen.

The longest 3 minutes of your life, when your phone buzzed with a message from Charles: 'I can't wait to see you baby xx' That put a smile on your face and warmed you up a little bit.

Until you timer went off. Bracing yourself, you gave yourself another small pep-talk, and finally checked the tests.

Positive Positive Positive

'Pickles' you mumbled, but you couldn't keep a smile off your face.

You needed to figure out what to say to Charles. You needed to prepare yourself for happy tears or sad tears.

As you arrived in Belgium, two days later, it was also the day of your anniversary.

As soon as you got to your shared room with Charles that morning he had pulled you in and his lips were on yours instantly.

'You're finally here mon amour' he mumbled as his tongue fought yours for dominance.

'Happy Anniversary baby' you said as you pulled away and hugged him as tight as you could.

'Happy Anniversary Y/N, I love you more than life.'

His words warmed your nerves. There was no way there were going to be sad tears when you told him. Right? You could only hope and pray so.

Since media duties for the race only started tomorrow, the day started with a good round of lazy sex and a beautiful bouquet of flowers from your boyfriend. Charles then took you on an unofficial tour of the city. He'd been here for 4 GPs now, so he had a couple of his favorite spots that he wanted to show you.

You had a lovely lunch at a tapas bar and then the afternoon was filled with more touring. You were glad today was a better day and you weren't feeling so ill.

You'd decided to tell Charles the news after dinner tonight. To make it a bit special, you had a onesie made in red that had a picture of a Ferarri and 'Baby Leclerc' written on it.

Dinner was lavish. He took you to an expensive restaurant meaning you dressed extremely smart with a black satin dress that showed your curved off in the most delicious way. It was no doubt that you would forgo any underwear today. Although once you told him the news and shed happy tears, you would go and change into some teeny lingerie for him.

As you got back to the hotel room, you told Charles you needed to talk to him, just as he was about to pounce on you. He said the serious look in your face and immediately backed away. He got so worried so you had to reassure him that everything was fine and it was nothing bad.

You made him sit on the couch while you went to get his gift.

Handing him the gift bag he couldn't take his eyes off of you.

He smiled and started to open it up.

By now your heart was pumping out of your body and you were shaking.

You bit your lip as he finally took the onesie out and looked at it, with a puzzled expression.

Then, he looked at your with wide eyes. You just gave him a smile.

Then his dimples flashed out at you. 'Y/N, is this for real? Are we actually having a baby?' he talked in quick French.

'Oui, we are, Charles'

He quickly pulled you in for the tightest hug.

'Oh my god, i can't believe it' he cooed in your neck.

Then he bought his hands down to your stomach and gently rubbed it, tears stinging his eyes and yours.

Pulling back, he had a brightest smile.

'Y/N you are such an incredible person. I can't tell you how happy you make me' he said, pulling you in again, this time for a kiss.

He breaks away to look that the onesie again, smiled growing impossibly bigger.

As you watched him, you wondered how you ever let yourself think Charles would be unhappy.

'I'll be back' you mumbled as you went to the bathroom to quickly change into your lacy black lingerie.

When you walked out and Charles looked you - let's just say he would die a happy man right now.

'Fuck me. What did i ever do to deserve you?' he said as he stood up and made a beeline to you.

He pushed you to the bathroom door and kissed you. He kissed you like there was no tomorrow. Full of passion. Full of love. And full of lust.

You opened your mouth to him and he explored all of your mouth, sucking into your bottom lip before giving you a small bite.

Quickly though, he removed himself from your hold and lowered down to his knees. He touched you stomach again and started talking.

'Hi baby, it's you daddy here.' he whispered, pecking your tummy.

'Mummy is keeping you safe, and i can only hope you turn out to be as amazing as she is. I love you so much, even though i just learnt about you not 10 minutes ago' kissing you stomach again.

You giggled at his words before pulling him to stand up again.

'He, or she, is only the size of a a grape right now' you told him.

'Grape or orange, i love them all the same. And i love you Y/N, so much'

'i love you too, my Charlie. I am so incredibly happy right now. I could burst' you told him.

'Oh non, please don't burst now' he laughed before his lips were on yours again.

'Wait, is it safe for us to have sex? Oh my god we had sex this morning. Are you ok? Is the baby okay?'

You all but giggled. 'Of course its safe my love. Plus, i am incredibly horny'

He didn't need to be told twice. He scooped you off your feet and set yow down on the bed.

'Let me show you how much i love you. Oh and i'm definitely fucking you with this still on, but another day' he said, pointing towards your lingerie. He quickly removed it before settling himself between you legs, aiming himself at your cunt.

He licked a warm strip up your pussy before sucking on your clit.

'Oh Charles. Fuck. You're amazing' you moaned while tugging on his hair.

'Cherie, you are the amazing one. Merde' he whispered before sinking two fingers into you.

It didn't take long to reach your first orgasm. He continued to finger fuck before you tried to move away.

'Need to feel you in me, Charles. Please. Please fuck me'

'A bit eager today, are we?' he smirked

'You fucking better get used to it. These hormones are not playing anymore' you laughed as he settled his weight on you.

He gently slid in and set a slow pace.

'Charles?' 'Hmm?' ha answered.

'I said fuck me. Not make love to me'

And so he did. He slammed into you. Filling you up so perfectly.

'Y/N' he breathed. 'You're so tight. Clenching around me so nicely. Fuck'

His thumb found your clit and you cried out. Your orgasm fast approaching. Charles as well finished rather quickly today. His warm cum feeling better than ever.

As you slowed down and both came down from you high, he slowly slid out of you.

As you looked down on him you noticed something.

'Char, you're still so hard' you said with a shocked face.

'Y/N, you don't know how turned on i still am' he said, almost shyly.

'Oh my god, please fuck me again. But this time i want to taste you, so finish in my mouth' you said as you both quickly found your places again.

You certainly were sore and sensitive, but you still couldn't get enough of him.

In no time you were crashing down again.

'Fuck, Charles' you moaned into his ear.

You quickly felt him pull out and place his feet on the floor as you sat up and took his dick into your hands.

He held you hair out of your face as you took him into your mouth and started bopping your head up and down.

'Fuck Y/N. Yes baby. Fuck' he all but screamed as he emptied himself to the back of your throat.

You swallowed everything you could.

You both tried to catch you breath as he sat back down on the bed and took you into his arms.

You were so overwhelmed. Now, you were crying.

'Are you okay Y/N? Did i hurt you? Shit, I heard you'

He barely held in a laugh. 'No Char, you didn't. I'm just so happy. I love you and out life so much.'

He kissed your forehead.

'I've never been happier my baby'

He got up to get a cloth to clean you both up the settled back into bed.

He pulled you to his side and just cuddled you.

'I love you, and happy anniversary amour'

'Love you too Char. Happy anniversary''' you replied back.

He kissed you. Long and soft. And you both were so excited for the rest of our lives together.

THE END.

Thank you so much for reading. I hope you enjoyed it!

[thelov3lybookworm]

My Fault (part 3)

Part 1 Part 2

Summary: Starting over.

•○●⛦●○•

A/n: Lol i just know half of you all gonna hate me for this, but this is the only way i could think of that would be good. I dont think making her end up with someone ese would have helped, so if you dont want her to end up with cass, then please dont read this.

also, why does sarah not tell us how people who cant winnow travel??? 😭😭😭

anyways, enjoy!

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Nina's excitement was palpable as Y/n slowly inserted the key into the front door of the home she shared with her husband, trying not to make too much noise in case he was in there, probably sleeping.

It was no use though, Y/n found out once she entered and ran up to her bedroom. Nina had just plopped down unceremoniously on the couch, telling Y/n to hurry up.

The moment Y/n pushed open the closed door to her and Cassian's bedroom -which she was sure was open when she left- she was hit with the strong scent of her husband.

Y/n froze on the threshold, staring wide eyed at her husband, who was on his knees in the middle of the room, fat tears rolling down his face.

He looked up, his eyes containing a world of pain and sadness and guilt and too may emotions that Y/n could not categorise them all.

"Cass?" Y/n mumbled, daring to take a step towards him. He released an anguished cry and launched forward, a dull thud echoing in his wake.

Cassian wrapped himself around Y/n's legs, sobbing into her abdomen. Y/n stared at the top of his head with furrowed brows, then rose her eyes to where he had been kneeling previously.

There, she found a worn diary lying on the wooden floor, left haphazardly. Y/n's blood chilled.

It was her diary.

Y/n usually hid it in her drawer, but she had been writing in it before she left to get coffee with Nina and everything went south.

Cassian had been gone more and more in the recent months, and to cope with all the sadness and need, Y/n began jotting down all that she felt in her empty diary.

And now he had read it all.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

Y/n was still frozen when she realised that her blouse was sticking to her skin because of his tears. "Tell you what?"

"Everything. Why did you not tell me how much you'd been hurting? Why did you not tell me that I'd been a shitty husband?"

Y/n watched his shoulder shake with every violent sob that ripped out of his chest, numbness spreading through her. "You were never around long enough for me to say anything."

He sobbed harder at that, and Y/n couldn't take it anymore. She let her hand drift to the top of his head, gently caressing his soft hair.

"My love, why are you crying?" Y/n reached down, cupping his jaw and tilting his head back. She ran her thumb across his cheek, wiping away the tears that never stopped, her other hand still resting in his hair.

More tears flowed from his eyes, and he opened his mouth to speak, but right at that moment, Nina spoke up from behind Y/n. Y/n hadn't even heard Nina walk up the stairs, so busy was she getting lost in her lover's eyes.

"Get away from her you bastard."

Y/n turned halfway, Cassian's death grip on her lessening just a little as he too peered from around Y/n. Y/n absently noted that Nina had left her bag down in the living room.

"Nina, please-"

"Y/n, don't. You just told me you wanted to leave, heal. What happened now? Are you having second thoughts?"

Y/n felt Cassian freeze, and she sighed, glaring at Nina. "You... you are leaving?"

"Thank you so much Nina, just what I needed." Y/n bit out, turning her back to her friend and glancing down at her kneeling husband. His skin was pale, paler than Y/n had ever seen him.

"What! I just helped you out! You had to tell him anyways!"

"Yes Nina, but I would have been more gentle!"

Nina huffed as Y/n grabbed Cassian's forearms and tugged. He complied, climbing to his feet as new tears gathered in his eyes. Y/n ignored her friend and grabbed Cassian's face tenderly in her hands.

"Cass? I... I need to leave."

"Why?" He whispered.

"I don't think I can handle letting your family walk all over me anymore. I need to stand up for myself. I'm sorry Cass, but I need to do this. Even if it kills me, I need to leave."

"I- they're your family too." His voice was quiet and uncertain, as though he knew Y/n would not believe him.

Y/n gave him a small, pained smile. "I don't think they feel that way."

"Please don't go Y/n. Rhys is feeling guilty for what he did. I'm sure everyone else is too. Maybe they're on their way here to apologise."

"Never seen anyone more delusional." Nina murmured from behind Y/n.

"Cass-"

Before Y/n could even get a word out, Nina piped up.

"If you really want to be with her, you can come with us. Leave this hell court."

Cassian ignored Nina again.

"Y/n, please don't go. I need you. We can all start over again. I promise they will realise how wrong they were."

"It's too late now. Give us a straight answer. If you love her, leave this place and come with us. If not, stay here and rot."

"Come on, Y/n. I can't leave them. They're my family."

"And she is not? You should not feel obligated to love someone because they're your family or whatever."

Cassian glared at Nina, then mumbled to Y/n. "Are you not going to defend me from her?"

"Like you defended her from your asshole family?"

Y/n could see Cassian trying to hold back a snarl at that, and she sighed, pinching her nose bridge between her forefinger and thumb. "Y/n. We need to talk. Alone."

Y/n nodded, glancing at her friend, who rolled her eyes. "I will be standing outside. Call for me when you're done."

She looked like she wanted to slam the door shut as she left, but she simply pulled it until it made a soft click.

Y/n turned to Cassian, offering him a tentative smile.

"Yes?"

Cassian took a step back. "I- I'll start from the beginning."

Y/n nodded uncertainly, wondering what he wanted to tell her. He grabbed Y/n's hand, gently tugging her to the end of the bed and sitting her down onto it.

"I... I don't know how to explain, but I'll try." Cassian took a deep breath as he settled into a kneeling position in front of Y/n. "First of all, I need you to know that I only ever kissed Nesta, and that was when I was drunk out of my mind."

He released a breath before continuing, clutching Y/n's hands as if they were his lifeline. "I... I know that isn't an excuse for what I did, and I never should have been at Rita's that night, but it happened, and I don't think anything I do or say will justify it.

"It started that day a year ago. When Rhys wanted to send me on a month long mission. Asshole, now that I think of it. I just now realise it for the plot it was." Cassian shook his head in disbelief. "He told me no one else could do it and that only I could do it. That should have alerted me, but alas, I now know that I'm very thick skulled."

A small giggle left Y/n, and Cassian's eyes rose to her lips, a little of life returning to the dull hazel. He smiled softly as his eyes met Y/n's, and her breath hitched. It had been far too long since the two of them had time like this.

"I remember you cried that day. That was the first time I'd seen you cry. I was so stressed because I did not want to leave you. That would have been the first time that I would be away from you for longer than a day. You told me you would write to me everyday."

Y/n could remember it very vividly. The way she had sobbed into Cassian's chest just as he was about to leave, the way she had stared up at him as his tears fell too. It had been a nightmare, to put it nicely.

"But you never did-"

Y/n interrupted him. "What do you mean I never did?"

Cassian glanced up at Y/n from where he was playing with her fingers, meeting her eyes with furrowed brows. "You never wrote to me? I never received any letters."

Y/n's lips parted in confusion. "I- I wrote to you everyday Cass. Sometime even multiple times a day."

Cassian stared at her in disbelief, and Y/n could see the gears in his brain churning. His mouth opened a few times, wanting to speak but no words coming out before realisation set in his features.

"Rhysand."

Y/n searched Cassian's eyes as anger and betrayal entered them, coming to the same realisation.

"Oh Cass." Y/n mumbled, reaching up to cup his cheek.

"Fucker." Cassian said under his breath, his wings flaring slightly.

After a moment of Cassian cursing Rhys and his entire family line, he continued. "I never received those letters, so I was a little upset because I was looking forward to writing you. When I returned, I decided that it would be best to give Rhys all the information I had before coming home so I could spend some days with you, locked away with no one interrupting us.

"But when I arrived, Rhysand said things about you that riled me up. He told me that he had asked you multiple times if you had to send any letters and that each time you told him to, basically, fuck off. I did not believe him, but it kept happening every time I was gone, to the point where I was starting to wonder if you liked me at all."

Cassian rested his head on their joined hands, releasing a deep breath. "I never should have believed that bastard, never should have doubted you. And I will forever regret that. Rhys also kept up with his manipulating to get me away from you, I see that now. I should have stopped him the first time he said things about you, but I guess I didn't want to upset him after everything he's done for me."

"He is your family, isn't he? He would not have expected anything of you." Y/n told him, making him nod.

"I know. Recently, after Feyre and her sister's arrival, Rhys started to gaslight me into thinking I liked Nesta. He made me spend more time with her, train her. He got so much out of it. For one, he could get me away from you, whatever his reasons. By assigning me to Nesta, he could keep her busy and out of the way.

"He... he really fucked up my mind. He is a daemati after all. Yesterday at Rita's, I realised something was wrong. That I couldn't put up my shields properly. Then the next thing I knew, I was kissing Nesta. I left soon after, not wanting to be near any longer."

He sucked in a tired breath, his hold tightening on Y/n's hands. She gave him a gentle squeeze and he continued. "Today, when I was about to come home, Rhys convinced me to stay till dinner. And I just... somehow couldn't say no. It was like- like..."

Cassian trailed off, his wide eyes meeting his wife's.

"Oh Cassian." Y/n slid onto his lap, pulling him close. "I'm so sorry he did that to you. I wish I had known what was happening sooner so I could stop it from ever happening."

Cassian shook his head, staring at the wall behind Y/n's head, his features distant.

"Not your fault. You could not have stopped it from happening."

Y/n knew that, but that didn't stop her from wanting to rip off Cassian's brother's head. Hell, she wished at least she's gotten a little bit of power from her parents so she could do anything to stop what Rhys had been doing to Cassian.

She could not even winnow, so what was she even worth? At least this Nesta was powerful enough to be mated to Cassian.

"I just- I just don't understand why he wanted you to be with Nesta."

Without moving his eyes, still that far off look on his face, Cassian mumbled. "She is my mate, and the mother pairs people who can produce the strongest offspring." Finally, Cassian met Y/n's gaze, his eyes haunted. "He wanted me to produce as strong as an offspring I could."

Y/n's heart broke for her husband. She knew how much the high lord mattered to him, and the betrayal she felt would probably not even compare to what he was feeling.

Cassian opened his mouth on a gasp, about to say something when knock drew their attention, stopping Cassian from speaking.

"Are you done yet?" Nina's voice called out. Y/n looked from the door to Cassian. He stared at the door like it had caused him some personal offence. "The caravan will not wait up for us, and only an hour is left-"

"Caravan?" Cassian questioned Y/n, turning to look at her as his hands fell to her waist. Y/n nodded.

"Neither of us can winnow, so Nina had to contact a friend who knew of an agent. He technically transports people from one court to another on horse and carriages."

Understanding entered his eyes. "You- you really were going to leave."

Y/n nodded, making to pull away from him so she could start packing up. His hold on her tightened.

"Please don't go. I need you. I will make it up to you, I promise. I will wait forever if that's what it takes to earn your forgiveness." His eyes were again filled with tears, making it harder for Y/n to turn away.

"Cass... I won't forgive you. Not anytime soon at least. But... maybe I can give you one last chance."

The tears overflowed from his eyes even as a huge grin split his face. "Thank you. Thank you so much my heart. I will not let you down again."

Y/n studied him for a moment, smiling when he started laughing softly while wiping at his tear stained cheek with the sleeve of his shirt. Y/n gently pushed back some stray strands of hair from his face, placing a kiss on his forehead.

"Maybe we can start all over again. Like we never knew each other."

Cassian nodded. "Even though what good times we had together are precious to me, I don't think we can mend this. We need to start over."

Y/n smiled wide for the first time in what felt like months, genuine joy singing through her blood. "Let's get ready then."

•○🌑○•

Nina's pov.

It was around ten minutes after that the door opened, and Nina nearly fell to her knees and thanked the mother for it. She was getting bored standing out here all by herself.

And in the next moment Nina wondered if she was dreaming.

Y/n stood in the doorway, a huge smile and blush on her face. That was not what shocked Nina, though it played a part in it.

No, it was Cassian, who stood behind Y/n, holding two duffel bags over his shoulder, a quiet joy on his face.

Nina rose a brow at the couple, who only grinned. Releasing a disbelieving sigh, Nina pushed away from the wall she was leaning against.

"I had booked an extra seat just in case. Thank the mother I did."

Y/n grabbed Nina in a quick hug, and her happiness brought a small smile to Nina's lips as well.

Y/n turned and practically skipped down the stairs, happy to leave. Cassian moved to follow, but Nina caught his arm. He looked down at her, his brows raised high.

"Don't you dare hurt her now. Or I will fucking carve your wings from your back. Understood?" If possible, his eyebrows rose higher, almost disappearing into his hairline. Obviously, Nina wished Y/n never forgive him, but Nina also knew how happy the brute made her best friend, and that was all Nina could ask for.

He studied her for a moment, then nodded, pulling his arm away from her. "Hmm. Good."

With that, both of them followed Y/n, ready to start all over again, make a new life.

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Taglist: @mybestfriendmademe @awkwardnerd @cleverzonkwombatsludge @blogforficslol @fasoaurore @fanboyluvr @darling006 @sonics-atelier @saltedcoffeescotch @lees-chaotic-brain @leeknows-wife

General Taglist: @bubybubsters @eos-princess @nightless @harrystylesfan2686 @cassie6392 @kennedy-brooke @tele86 @miluiel1 @hnyclover @minnieoo @sidrapotter @piceous21 @mybestfriendmademe @anuttellaa

Cassian Taglist: @moonlwghts

[shroomyart404]

I’ve been thinking about the thunder legion, more specifically how they came to Fairy Tail. Because out of all the characters we see stuff about, we don’t see anything about them or their initial connection to Laxus.

So I got to brewing

Evergreen was the first to meet Laxus, she was maybe 12 when Laxus passed through with one of the adults in Fairy Tail. They were on their way to the train station to get back to the guild and stopped for food. She overhears Laxus say they’re headed to fairy tail and she gets so excited by the fact theirs a fairy guild she interrupts and asks Laxus numerous questions, saying she’s gonna join. So when she shows up 2 years later, dropped off by her older brother, Laxus isn’t too surprised. He is a bit caught off guard though when she only seems to hang around him though - he’s the only person she knows and joining a guild isn’t like what she’d thought.

It was just her and her brother, and he thought Fairy Tail would be a good place for her to start making friends and earn money she wouldn't get back home.

Between meeting Evergreen and Evergreen joining is when Bickslow meets Laxus and joins Fairy Tail.

Laxus had finished up a solo mission, and needed a place to stay afterwards as it was getting to night. And he was hungry. He passed through a really run-down town, grumbling about how he wasn't gonna find much out here until an old man calls him over. it's clear Laxus isn't around here, and after confirming that Laxus is a wizard asks him to protect the house for a few days in exchange for food and shelter.

Laxus agrees and stays out on guard the first night, watching as some kids his age make their way through town going to houses and taking food, led by a lanky boy with a trail of 5 dolls following him. One of the kids tries to approach the house Laxus is guarding but is quickly scared off. The next night, similar happens, but this time the lanky kid, Bickslow who is clearly the ringleader of this group, approaches him.

"You're messing with the wrong place. I suggest you leave before things get messy." Bickslow says, and Laxus refuses. So, Bicks challenges Laxus to a fight. And to no surprise Laxus wins, and before he helps Bicks up he asks what's even happening around here.

Bickslow tells him about how the city was plagued by attacks from a dark guild that's now been disbanded. The town didn't have the money or the resources to rebuild, Bickslows friends were caught in the crossfire of the dark guild's anarchy - these friends' souls are the ones in the 5 toys, later to be his totems. Laxus knows he can't help, but he tells Bickslow that money's needed he can join Laxus on higher-earning quests. Help keep other towns from ending up like this. This convinces Bicks, and the future of the town gets better because Makarov talks with his connections and the town gets rebuilt.

Finally, Freed. It's maybe a year after Evergreen joined. Freed has been travelling around Fiore trying to find someone who could take away his "curse" (the forbidden magic). He often goes to the cathedrals and such, but most either direct him on to the next or to wizarding guilds - which Freed doesn't want to go near fearing rejection. He comes to Magnolia, and after Kardia Cathedral also say there's nothing they can do, he's sat on the steps knees pulled up to his chest.

"You crying?" Evergreen approaches him, having nothing better to do while she waits for Bickslow and Laxus to be done with whatever they are doing.

"No." Freed doesn't look at her, which Ever finds rude and gives a huff.

"Well then stop looking like you are."

"My sadness is none of your business."

"So you are sad?"

the conversation carries on like this back and forth, Freed utterly confused how this girl keeps asking questions and invading his business. Eventually, Laxus and Bickslow come over to ask Evergreen who she's talking to.

"Oh, I dunno. I didn't ask his name."

"Freed. My name is Freed Justine."

"It's got to be a bit cold sat on those steps," Bickslow says

"Does it matter? I've got nowhere further to go on my search."

"Then you can get out of the cold, don't go being stupid." Laxus holds out his hand to help Freed up, and he takes it. They take him along to the guild so they're out of the cold and have some food. They ask why he's in Magnolia, and Freed reluctantly tells them about his fruitless search to have his magic taken away.

"Well, you've come to the right place," Laxus says, and Freed has a look of hope.

"Really? You mean there's someone here who can take this curse away?"

"Nope. but there are people a bit like you here." Laxus gestures to Bickslow and Evergreen. "I seem to keep collecting randos with weird eyes, what's another one."

"Hey!" Evergreen huffs and gives Laxus a shake "But he's right. You'd fit right in, Freed."

And thus, the Thunder Legion was formed.

[matttgirlies]

Matt & Me🎀

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24

a story heavily based on Priscilla Presley’s Book “Elvis & Me” based in the 1950’s - 1970’s.

fem! reader x singer! matt

disclaimer!! - in no way am i saying matt would ever support or do these kind of things, for the sake of the book certain unethical things do happen at times.

warnings - mentions of drug use

y/nn = your nickname for any confusion🩷

Chapter 11

Matt Sturniolo created his own world; only in his own environment did he feel secure, comfortable, and protected. A genuine camaraderie was created at Graceland. We lived as one big family, eating, talking, arguing, joking, playing, and traveling together.

Although I became friends with the guys in Matt’s retinue, he never let me, or anyone else, forget that I was his girl. I was never to get too close or become too familiar with any of the regulars.

One evening, after we came home from a movie, we said good night to everyone and went upstairs. Returning to the kitchen a few minutes later to get something to eat, I found Jerry Schilling, who’d just started working for Matt, making himself a snack. We started talking. A few minutes later, Matt appeared.

“What the hell are you two doing down here?” he shouted at us.

Intimidated, Jerry said, “Well, Matt, we were just talking. I was asking her how she felt, because she didn’t feel well this afternoon.”

“I came down to get something to eat,” I explained.

“y/nn, you don’t need to be roaming around here late at night,” he said, angrily ordering me upstairs.

Behind me, I could hear him lashing out at Jerry. “If you want to keep this job, son, you mind your own business. If there’s anyone who’s going to ask her how she feels, it’ll be me. You better mind your own goddamn business.”

I liked Jerry. He was warm, sincere, and very personable; just a couple of years older than I, he was one of the few people who I could relate to. But from that time on, it was a dodging match every time we’d run into each other. Now Jerry and I laugh about the “good old days” when we reminisce.

Most of the boys who worked for Matt had been around from the beginning and they knew all about him—his sense of humor, his sensitivity, and his temper. He stripped himself bare in front of them, and they accepted him for what he was.

Yet working for Matt was a twenty-four-hour-a-day job, and the boys were at his beck and call constantly. They played when he played and slept when he slept. It took a certain kind of personality to put up with his demands, whether they made sense or not.

“Come on, y/nn, let’s go to Los Angeles. I’ll show you where I film movies.,” he said one afternoon when we’d only been up for a few hours. He called downstairs and told Alan to alert everyone that he wanted to leave within the hour.

Alan said, “Okay, Boss. I think Richard and Gene are still sleeping. I’ll give ’em a call and tell ’em to come right over.”

“Their lazy asses are still sleeping?” Matt asked. “I’ve been up for two goddamn hours. They should have been over here by now. Alan, from now on, when I call down for my breakfast, call the boys and tell them I’m up and to be ready for anything, and that may include me not even coming downstairs. I just want them here.”

Demanding? Yes, but Matt could be just as generous. By today’s standards the boys’ salaries were not high—the average paycheck was $250 a week—but if the boys ever felt the pinch by the end of the month, they would go to Matt. They’d ask him if he could help them out with a down payment on a house or the first and last months’ payments on an apartment. Matt always came through for them, lending them the one thousand or five thousand or ten thousand dollars they asked for. He was rarely if ever paid back.

There also was no limit to the expensive gifts he gave them—television consoles for Christmas, bonus checks, Cadillac convertibles, Mercedes-Benzes. If he heard someone was sad or depressed, he loved to surprise them with a gift, usually a brand-new car. When he gave to one, he would usually end up giving to all.

James didn’t have much respect for the guys. He said Matt just gave and gave and gave, and they took and took and took. He’d say, “Son, we have to save.” Matt would answer, “It’s only money, Dad. I just have to go out and make more.”

James resented the regulars acting as if Graceland was their personal club. They’d go into the kitchen at any hour and order anything they wanted. Naturally, everyone ordered something different. The cooks worked night and day keeping them happy. James felt, “To hell with the boys. Their main concern should be Matt.”

What was really outrageous was that the regulars were ordering sirloin steaks or prime ribs while Matt usually ate hamburgers or peanut butter and banana sandwiches.

I wasn’t too popular around Graceland when I started reorganizing the kitchen. I set down a policy of having one menu per meal, and anyone who didn’t like what was on it could go to a local restaurant. This new edict resulted in much grumbling from the guys, but the cooks were relieved, and James sanctioned my decision, announcing, “It’s about time someone organized the meals. It was beginning to look like we were feeding half of Boston.”

Matt was the boss, the provider, and the power. Both the boys and I had to protect him from people who annoyed or irritated him and were no longer in his favor. Before coming down for the evening, he’d have me call downstairs to check who was there. I’d run down the guests, aware that certain names would strike him wrong.

“Shit,” he’d say, his mood destroyed. “What’s he want? Bring me some more bad news?” He’d stay up in his room rather than spend an evening with someone he didn’t like. There was one particular regular who had incurred his disfavor, and Matt told everyone he didn’t want him around. “Don’t let him through those goddamn gates!” Matt ordered. “All I have to do is look at his face and I get depressed.” Matt barred him from Graceland for a number of years, saying, “If he changes his morbid attitude, maybe I’ll change my mind.” His perceptions were correct, as these “friends” eventually betrayed him.

Matt and James kept some of their relatives at a distance because, as Matt explained to me, they’d shunned him when he was growing up, ridiculing him as a sissy, a mama’s boy. Mary Lou stood up for Matt and told his tormentors to go their own way. Angrily, she had said, “Don’t bother us with these accusations.”

Then fame and fortune hit, and suddenly all the kinfolk came around, begging for jobs or crying that they needed help. Sometimes Matt got upset, charging, “The only time they visit is with their hand out. It’d be nice if they’d come around just to see how I was doing. But hell no, it’s always, ‘Ah, Matt, I could use a little extra cash. Could you help me out?’ Hell, I’ll bet when I’m dead and gone, they’ll still be taking advantage.” But Matt ended up slipping each of them a hundred dollars or more every time they came around. If it had been up to James, he would have gotten rid of every one of them. But Matt kept saying, “No, Dad, they don’t have any place to go. They couldn’t work anywhere. Keep them here.”

From the beginning of his success, Matt put many family members on salary, and all had titles. James was his business manager; Patsy, his personal secretary; uncles Vester Sturniolo and Johnny and Travis Smith, and cousin Harold Lloyd, gate guards; cousins Billy, Bobby, and Gene, personal aides; and then there was Tracy Smith, who seemed to go from brother to brother for support. Matt took care of everyone.

I remember one night at Graceland when Matt came back to the kitchen and saw Tracy pacing the floor. “Hey, Tracy,” he said, “How ya doing, man?” Tracy, his hands in his pockets, could hardly look Matt in the eye. “I don’t know, Matt,” he sighed. “What do ya mean, you don’t know? Everyone knows how they’re doin’, man.”

Tracy, shifting back and forth, mumbled, “I got my nerves in the dirt, Matt.” Matt staggered back, laughing. “Nerves in the dirt! Hell, I never heard it expressed like that before. You need some money, Tracy?”

Again, Tracy just shifted back and forth, as Matt called Nate over and told him to give Tracy a bill. A big smile covered Tracy’s lined face as he happily took his hundred dollars and walked out the door.

Matt knew that having his nerves in the dirt was Tracy’s way of saying he was down and out—and worried sick about it. He never forgot that phrase. “Poor ol’ Matt,” he’d say. “I’ll never forget the look on his face that night, poor ol’ guy.”

That was Matt—always caring, always sensitive to everyone’s needs, even while presenting a macho image to his fans and friends.

Anything I could think of doing for him, I did. I made sure Graceland was always warm and inviting, with the lights turned low, as he preferred them, the temperature in his bedroom set to his exact desire (freezing), and the kitchen filled with the aroma of his favorite meals.

Every night before dinner was served, I came downstairs first, checked with the maids to see that his food was just the way he liked it—his mashed potatoes creamily whipped, plenty of cornbread, and his meat burnt to perfection. I always had candles on the dining room table to create a romantic atmosphere despite the fact that we always ate with several of the regulars.

I loved babying Matt. He had a little-boy quality that could bring out the mother instinct in any woman, a beguiling way of seeming utterly dependent. It was this aspect of his charm that made me want to hold him, shower him with affection, protect him, fight for him, and yes, even die for him. I went to extremes in taking care of him, from cutting his steak at dinner to making sure his water glass was always filled. I enjoyed pampering and spoiling him and found myself jealous of others vying for his attention and approval.

But I didn’t always receive his approval. If something went wrong with his dinner, Matt blew up. “Why isn’t this steak done? Why didn’t you make sure the maids cooked it right? If you’d have done your job, it wouldn’t have turned out like this.” Obviously something else was wrong, and I didn’t recognize it at the time. Because of the continuous pressures and problems in Matt’s life, all magnified by taking prescribed drugs, little things would set him off. I took responsibility for everything in his life and always took it all too personally.

I wanted to be with Matt as much as I could, but while going to the movies or the fairgrounds every night might have been a wonderful way for him to relax, it posed an enormous problem for me. Often I wouldn’t get home until 5 or 6 a.m., and I’d have to be at school two hours later. Sometimes I never went to sleep. When I did, I could barely make it out of bed. I would lie there trying to drum up the strength to face the day, Matt making it even harder by suggesting that I sleep in and cut classes. It would have been so easy to go along with his suggestion, but hanging over me was the agreement I’d made with my parents. They trusted me and even though I was letting them down, I still had to keep up the facade.

Day after day I drove to school, attended classes till noon, then returned to Graceland to slip back into bed and cuddle next to Matt, who was still sound asleep. When he awoke at 3 or 4 p.m., I might never have left his side for all he knew. I was there to give him his usual order of orange juice, a Spanish omelet, home-fried potatoes, a mere two pounds of bacon, and—first and foremost—his black coffee.

Everyone who knew Matt was aware that it took him at least two to three hours to wake up fully. Asking him to make a decision, even a simple one such as what movie he wanted to see that night, was ill-advised. He was just too groggy and irritable from the sleeping pills, which were causing him to sleep as many as fourteen hours a day. It seemed only natural for him to take some Dexedrine to wake up.

I was always concerned about his intake of sleeping pills. His horror of insomnia, compounded with a family history of compulsive worrying, caused him to down three or four Placidyls, Seconals, Quaaludes, or Tuinals almost every night—and often it was a combination of all four. When I expressed my concern, he just picked up the medical dictionary, always near at hand on his night table.

“In here is the explanation for every type of pill on the market, their ingredients, side effects, cures, everything about them,” he assured me. “There isn’t anything I can’t find out.”

It was true. He was always reading up on pills, always checking to see what was on the market, and which ones had received FDA approval. He referred to them by their medical names and knew all their ingredients. Like everyone else around him, I was impressed with his knowledge and certain that he was an expert. One would think he had a degree in pharmacology. He always assured me that he didn’t need pills, that he could never become dependent on them. This difference in opinion resulted in many serious confrontations; I always compromised my integrity and ended up taking his viewpoint.

I began taking sleeping pills and diet pills too. Two Placidyls for him and one for me. A Dexedrine for him and one for me. Eventually Matt’s consumption of pills seemed as normal to me as watching him eat a pound of bacon with his Spanish omelet. I routinely took “helpers” in order to get to sleep after wild rides at the fairgrounds or early-morning jam sessions. And I routinely took more “helpers” when I woke up in order to maintain the fast pace and, more importantly, to study for my final exams.

During the last month before finals, I started popping more dexies than before. They seemed to give me the energy I needed to get through classes and homework. Every free moment was devoted to cramming a whole semester’s work into a few weeks. But my concentration was scattered; the strain of life at Graceland had finally caught up with me.

I had already been warned by Sister Adrian that in order for me to graduate, I had to pass all my subjects. During a talk in her office, I wanted desperately to confide in her and explained how hard it was to maintain my grade level with the late hours I kept: But how could I tell that to a nun?

I had no real goals after graduation, but I did sometimes dream of becoming a dancer or possibly enrolling in an art academy. Now I realize that I was deeply influenced by Matt’s casual attitude toward continued schooling. He figured I didn’t need it and I agreed. Just being with him most of the time would provide an education—not to mention experience—that no school could give me. He wanted me to be his totally, free to go to him in an instant if he needed me.

That sounded great to me. I’d never planned on a future without Matt. Therefore, while my classmates were deciding which colleges to apply to, I was deciding which gun to wear with what sequined dress. I was tempted to say to Sister Adrian, “Oh, by the way, Sister, does gunmetal gray go with royal blue sequins?” With that attitude it was no surprise that I was still woefully unprepared for my most hated subject, algebra, the week before finals.

On the day of the test, I sat in the crowded classroom, hyper from downing a dexy, trying to work out the problems. Despite my effort, I knew there was no way I was going to pass. I started to panic. I had to graduate. I had an obligation to Matt and to my parents, who I knew would yank me out of Graceland the minute I failed this test. I glanced at the girl next to me—and at her completed test paper. It’s my last resort, I thought. I’m going for it. I was not willing to face the consequences of being sent home for failing this test.

Her name was Janet and she was a straight A student. I tapped her on the shoulder and flashed my brightest smile, whispering, “Are you a Matt fan?” Taken aback by my question, Janet nodded yes. “How would you like to come to one of his parties?” I asked.

“Are you kidding?” she replied. “I’d love to.”

“Well, I know a way that it can be arranged.”

I eyed her test paper and explained. Janet instantly grasped my dilemma and, without a word, slid her paper to the edge of her desk. Now I had a full view of her answers. I spent the rest of the hour furiously copying them down and I not only passed, but I got an A on that test.

I hadn’t expected Matt to make much of my graduation. His attitude was, “A diploma’s not that important; life’s experiences are.” But to my surprise, he really looked forward to it and arranged to have a big party for our friends after the ceremony. There he presented a beautiful red Corvair, my first car.

On the big night he was like a proud parent. Nervous about what he should wear to the ceremony, he finally settled on a dark blue suit, and I put on my navy blue gown. I couldn’t possibly keep the cap on over that mass of teased hair.

Matt had a limo waiting for us out front. But there was one problem: I did not want him to come to the actual ceremony. It would attract a lot of attention, and all eyes would be focused on him instead of the graduating seniors.

Finally I worked up enough courage to ask him to wait outside, and explained why. Smiling his funny little grin, the one that came to his lips when he was hurt or upset, he agreed without hesitation. “I hadn’t thought about that,” he said. “I won’t come in. I’ll just be outside in the car waiting for you. That way I’ll kinda be there.”

And that was what he did. I accepted my diploma with mixed emotions. I would have loved for him to have been watching, but only I knew what a physical, emotional, and mental strain it had been to get that piece of paper. To me, it represented freedom, freedom to stay out until dawn if I wanted and sleep all day if I wanted. It represented freedom from my school uniform and from the teasing the entourage subjected me to every time they caught me in it trying to sneak past them at Graceland. I was a big girl playing in the big leagues.

As soon as I could get away, I ran outside. In front of the church, Matt and the boys were standing by the long black limo, looking like the Chicago Mafia in their dark glasses and suits, each concealing a.38. Around them a group of nuns were clamoring for Matt’s autograph.

Excerpt from: "Elvis and Me" by Priscilla Beaulieu Presley. Scribd. This material may be protected by copyright.

a/n - so cute🎀

[sirianasims]

Insurrection - Part 2

While my parents were obviously very upset at the time, my brother was excited and wanted to go. The strangers, his uncle and grandmother, would take him with them when they returned to Sixam. Until then, my mother would teach them about her new technology.

The next few days, before they left, the rest of us tried to spend as much time with my brother as possible.

I admit that I was angry with him at first. I felt that he was abandoning me. Who was now going to help me with homework and make me laugh when I had a rough day at school?

Luckily, we managed to make up before he left. And I could see why he wanted to go – it was both an obligation and an adventure to him.

My father also had a heart-to-heart with my brother, the last night before he left for Sixam. It was a warm night and I could hear them outside my open window.

I know my father and brother both consider themselves true father and son, despite my brother’s origins. I hope spending time with his biological father on Sixam hasn’t changed that.

When the Sixams left, my dear brother left with them. I knew that it could take years before he would be able to travel back and visit us, especially if the wormhole technology never worked.

Trying to overcome the sadness of my brother leaving, my mother threw herself into her work. Sometimes I would barely see her for days, because she would stay late at the lab every day.

We now know that it was worth it, that she finally managed to secure a communication link, so we can get updates from my brother every few months, but she still hasn’t succeeded in establishing travel, and my brother is too busy to leave Sixam for a year or two just to visit.

My father tried to compensate for my mother’s constant working by spending more time with me.

But my father’s job was also very demanding, and I often spent my afternoons alone.

Most days, I only had Maggie for company.

But she was more than enough.

It’s not that I didn’t have friends, I had good friends at school, but I couldn’t exactly schedule playdates every single day.

One day, when I was alone at the playground, I saw a stray cat. She was limping and very dirty, and would not let me get near her, but I wanted to help her.

I spent the entire day trying to befriend her, and she finally let me pick her up so we could take her to the vet.

The cat had no chip or ear tattoo, and when no one came forward to claim her, my parents decided that I could keep her. I named her Winky.

Seeing how the veterinarian expertly diagnosed her problems and treated her while being kind and respectful made me realise that this is what I want to do with my life as well.

My parents tell me that I would play vet constantly, and bring home any animal I found. I was allowed to keep smaller birds and a couple of mice while nursing them back to health, but my parents helped me take any stray cats and dogs to the shelter, or I would have had an entire zoo.

A few years later, one of our neighbours had to move into a retirement home, and had to find a new home for her old dog, Milo. I had often been walking him for her, and she wanted me to have him. This time, my parents did not object.

Animals are what keeps me going, my reason to be courageous, kind, and disciplined. These are the qualities I will bring to Foxbury.

Thank youoooo99999ggggrrrrr;;;;;;;;33333333333

“Winky, seriously? Thanks for helping, but this is a very important letter.”

Thank you for your time and consideration. I hope this essay gives you a better idea of the passion I bring to everything I do, and that I will bring to the field of veterinary medicine.

I look forward to speaking with you again in the future – hopefully as a student at your esteemed institution.

Sincerely, Eric Fyres-Munch Duchelli Asphalt Abode Newcrest

beginning / previous / next

[secretlythepits]

A New Day

Thanks for all the advice and support. As Annie would sing: “Yesterday was plain awful.”

“You can say that again.”

“Yesterday was plain awful.”

“But that’s, not now. That’s then!”

I had two talks. The one with my husband was bad. The one with my son was good. To be honest, that’s the one that really matters. That’s the relationship I have to get right.

I’m in a tricky spot.

We were (I was) considering divorce before his diagnosis. Because of financial and logistical reasons, I knew I wouldn’t leave until the kids finished high school. I don’t want to destabilize them economically and socially. Also, I need time to build my career and health, so it made sense to stay with one foot out the door.

A couple of months ago my husband and I really got into the state of our marriage. Communication has been a huge issue. We started really hashing out things that had been left unsaid. Things improved a bit. I felt heard, but maybe still not quite seen. He said he wanted to get back to a closeness and that was my first choice too. We figured if we both had that as a goal, we could move there.

Yesterday, after we spoke about our fight, I realized that I can’t remember the last time I felt loved by him. How sad is that? I decided to divorce him in my heart, because he is never going to give me what I want and need. He is never going to give me what I deserve. He doesn’t see me and he refuses to open his eyes. I know I am a good person. I know that I have a lot of wonderful things inside of me that I freely share with others, but he just doesn’t even look at me. I stopped showing him who I was, my ideas, my important thoughts, the deepest parts of me, because he is not a safe person for my heart.

But I am still logistically stuck. Me leaving while he is sick would devastate my kids. Our finances haven’t changed. My health hasn’t changed. I don’t want to do lasting damage to my relationship with my children by bailing while their father is dying.

And I don’t hate him. We do have a friendship and a connection to our shared memories and kids that will always be unparalleled. Also, I am a compassionate person and wouldn’t feel right letting him suffer all by himself. I care about him and it hurts to watch his health deteriorate. We can be partners, like in business. We do that pretty well for the most part.

My goal has changed.

I don’t want to work on closeness. I want distance. Miles. Oceans. Continents.

I feel sad about this, but also really, really good about what feels like the ultimate in self-care. I don’t need to torture myself by working on a relationship that has been broken for years. I don’t want a refurbished love, I want a brand spanking new one that sparkles and dazzles. Not now. Not near. In the far off future.

I have more pressing and interesting goals.

1. I am going to build a digital products empire.

2. I am going to host luxury personal development retreats in fabulous international locations.

3. I am going to travel the world.

4. I am going to lose all my extra weight and become very strong.

5. I am going to buy the most colorful, pattern-filled wardrobe ever and wear way too many accessories every day.

That is where I’m going. That is worth getting close to. I can feel my mind, heart, and spirit lining up and clicking into rhythm because I think this has been the destination for a long time. I just wasn’t ready to leave until now.

Thank you, dear readers, for making me not feel alone.

[unknownarchiviste]

coming home with you

⟡ some nights ⟡ hong joshua // 761 words ⟡ no sensitive contents ⟡ hello! i'm back with another installment of my short fic series—some nights. this has been in my drafts since holiday season but i haven't had the time to polish it up. also, after writing here for 2 years (time flew by so quickly!), i finally launched by ko-fi account (yay!). there's nothing there yet but i'll probably tell you guys if i ever post something there :) anyways, i hope you enjoy this fic. ⟡ other stories

that night when you and joshua miss home

The sound of the train doors opening woke you up.

Sleepily, you looked around and saw that you were near your station. You immediately sat up straight and checked your phone for the time. It was already nearing midnight.

After having a really busy day and hopping in a train immediately after work to travel for five hours from Busan to Seoul, it was no wonder you fell asleep. It didn't help that every passenger on the subway was so quiet you could only hear the therapeutic sound of the wagons moving over the rails. It wasn't surprising though, especially since it was the last train of the day. Everyone was probably as tired as you.

You unlocked your phone and messaged your boyfriend Joshua.

'Are you already asleep? :)'

Your job as an event planner assistant usually requires you to go in and out of the office to meet with clients. Traveling from place to place is nothing new to you. However, you were assigned to a big event in Busan, which is approximately 3-5 hours away from Seoul. Given that the client and the suppliers were mostly in Busan, the event team were to temporarily stay there. 

It is your first big event since you started working. At the same time, it is also the first time you'll be in a sort of long distance relationship with Joshua. You're not sure if you were to be happy or sad about it.

At first, you were handling it quite well. The late night video calls after your busy days were enough to keep you from missing him. However, a month into that set-up, there were some nights you missed him so badly you cry after your late night calls.

And tonight was one of those nights.

As soon as you handed in your deliverable for the day, you immediately took a train back to Seoul. He would probably scold you for traveling after a tiring day but you really wanted to see him.

You wanted to be home.

The train finally reached your stop but Joshua hasn’t replied yet. He was probably asleep. Should you go home to your apartment tonight and just go to him early tomorrow? But the image of his confused sleepy face if you come knocking at his door this time of the night was pretty tempting.

You were walking out of the exit, contemplating whether to surprise him tonight or not when a figure stepped in front of you. You were about to move aside to give the stranger some room to walk to when the familiar whiff of perfume hit your nose. Immediately, you looked up and gasped.

“Hi?” Joshua grinned, probably enjoying your surprised expression.

Your tired mind was having a hard time catching up on what’s happening. You were supposed to surprise him in his apartment. He was supposed to be asleep. You were supposed to knock on his door and jump into his embrace as soon as he opened the door. 

He wasn’t supposed to be standing in front of you, still in his office clothes at midnight, smiling down at you.

“Shua?” was the only word you said, still frozen in surprise.

“I was about to surprise you too,” he explained, still chuckling at your reaction. “But when I asked your workmates about where you’re staying and what time you’ll be out, they told me you’re headed here. So I just waited for you...”

You stared at him, still couldn’t believe that he’s in front of you. But when your gaze traveled from his face down to his hand which was holding a small bouquet of flowers, reality finally dawned on you. Your tears welled up. Your hands flew to cover your face that’s starting to get flooded by tears. 

“You even have flowers,” you cried.

Joshua laughed as he pulled you into a tight embrace. He kissed the top of your head and gently rubbed your back. “I missed you so much,” he whispered.

You cried more as he enveloped you with warmth—both your tired body and your weary heart. Being in his arms felt like finally lying down on a soft bed after a long day. His gentle pats on your back felt like the encouragement you badly needed to go on. His little kisses on the top of your head felt like your favorite dream that you would always remember.

And when he pulled away, cradling your tear-stricken face in his hands, you couldn’t help but say, “I’m home...”

Joshua smiled, wiping your tears away. “I am, too.”

[bromcommie]

Hello & Happy Monday!

So...for the WIP tag game...I know I'm supposed to pick the one (1! ONE!) that I find most intriguing, but this is like a whole buffet of intrigue, so maybe I can have two? 👀 1) НОЧНОЙ РАЗГОВОР (FIGURE OUT) <- ngl, the 'figure out' cracked me up. Also, late night conversations? Yes, please!

2) what's a nice nutcase like you doing in a place like astoria 1203 <- this just sounds fun...and possibly like the title could be deliberately misleading

Thank you! <3

Hello helloo, happy Monday to you too! (but also Tuesday now I guess. It's a 2-for-1!)

Thank you for the ask, and thank you for indulging me with two (2! it's gonna be so long!) <3

НОЧНОЙ РАЗГОВОР (FIGURE OUT!!!) - Ooof, this fucking guy. I'm glad my stern instructions to myself in the title there were funny, because I do indeed need to FIGURE this one OUT and it's bugging me. It's essentially another chapter that's a part of a larger work (not naming names not pointing fingers but it's. The Work I'm Having Trouble Updating) and it was written a looong while back, which is why it's now a standalone file. I love the premise but I kinda want to tear it down and rebuild it entirely, mostly because I'm still deciding on whether I like the way I wrote the backstory for it. So. It's fun! It's challenging! It's giving me a migraine! The title's from this song about a tired traveler trying to find his way in the night. It's three conversations (Steve+Nat, Nat+Bucky and Bucky+Steve - although they barely talk at all) that happen in the night after a very not lucid, injured Don't-Call-Me-Bucky who's recently remembered the Red Room and also had a pretty rattling encounter with the code words seeks Natasha out in Europe for [redacted] something as a last resort, but instead accidentally walks straight into Steve who he's been staying away from like the Devil Himself since CATWS. And then basically bleeds all over him. (I am not immune to the wound care trope! However, this is unfortunately not that.) A lot of ugly feelings and defense mechanisms are brought up, some painful memories re: the war and the Red Room are brought up, and nobody's having a good time or really knows how to process jack shit. They all communicate/perceive love&protection in wildly different ways, and while all three dynamics end on some kind of natural conclusion it's still a lot of unfinished, unspoken business and just kind of sad. Hurt no comfort that's necessary for there to be the promise of comfort in the future, if you will. Tbh, I really want to finish/reincorporate this one. But it's just so *screams into paper bag*. Anyway. Snippet:

When Steve wakes up the next morning Bucky’s gone, like he knew he would be. Like a hurricane passing through, the foreknowledge doesn’t make the aftermath any easier. And then what? his own voice from so long ago echoes in his head as he waits for the water for Natasha’s tea to boil in the sunny little kitchenette of the motel’s lobby. 16 hours later, he’s watching the blinding stripe of the sun setting over the East River before the plane maneuvers onto the landing strip at JFK. The hell else? Then we march on, ace. We go home.

2. what's a nice nutcase like you doing in a place like astoria 1203 - oh good, thank god! So this one is a bit more fun, but it's only got a few disjointed half-scenes so far. The title is actually one of the most literal ones on the list - the fic does take place in Astoria, Queens, and it does involves a certain "nutcase". Several, even. They really don't get along, and then they almost do.

(Blame my recent rewatch of the Netflix shows for this one. Man. What a golden age that was.)

Excerpt under the cut:

It was easy to clock the combat training before, sure, but up close this guy’s… Keyed up. Wild-eyed, a little, and not in the twitchy way of the three idiots piled up outside by the ruined water hydrant, not just sheer adrenaline stoked by fear and booze and coke. More dialed-in, purposefully ruthless. Hungry. Getting up with an expression like an enraged bull in spite of the beating he just took. Nutcase, Barnes thinks bleakly. Not that he’s in any position to judge — glass houses, all that, but — “What’re you,” he croaks, “some kind of psycho?” “Says the guy who just mowed down six guys without blinking." The man spits, grimacing at the blood that lands on the stark white of the rooftop like it personally offends him. If he notices the similar spray across his busted face, his clothes, his military-short hair, he doesn't seem to give a damn. "Nice going, by the way— my man got away." "And my man's bleeding out on a fucking pool table downstairs," he grits out. He doesn't have time for this. This whole night has been one giant exercise in unpredictability, and the police sirens echoing off in the distance are problem enough without him having to duke it out over and over with some local homicidal moron who might or might not be HYDRA. "You wanna tell me what that's about?" The man levels an irritated look back at him and then shrugs, dismissive. "I don't play with my food." "Your food had intel I've been hunting for two weeks." "Tough shit. Maybe if you hadn't screwed up your goddamn trig—" His lip curls of its own volition, affronted despite himself. What an appropriate time for his ego to announce it's back from the dead and in the mix. How fun. “The hell I did. I don’t miss.” "Is that right? There's some real screwed up drywall down there that says otherwise." His voice picks up an edge of something dangerous, aiming for threatening and landing on feral as he takes a step closer, and Jesus, can he stay down already? "Unless you did it on purpose to let him know I'm coming because you work for the bastard, in which case lemme tell you, you and me have a whole different problem." "I don't work for anybody," he says, probably with more intensity than strictly necessary. "He was a civillian. I don't kill civillians." The words curl acerbic on his tongue. He doesn't. He doesn't. That, of all things, makes the man laugh, a bitter little thing that sounds like it clawed its way out of his throat, and only barely. Who the fuck is this guy. "Oh Jesus Christ, not this bullshit again— how many of you assholes are running around this place, huh?" he says, gesturing a little wildly at him. "You got a fancy catsuit under that hobo getup, too?" It's Barnes' turn to look at him like he's a few marbles short, which judging by all evidence he very well might be. The guy snorts at his confusion, shaking his head. "If you consider that criminal piece of dog shit a civilian, you’re way more out of your depth than I thought, kid.”

but also:

“Self-righteous, God's sacrificial lamb type-of-shit," he mumbles around the mouthful with distaste, staring off across the bridge. "Got himself a stupid fucking title and everything, if you can believe that. Major pain in my ass.” Barnes hums, considering, before taking a cautious bite of his own sandwich. The thick pile of fatty meat and melted cheese breaks apart in his mouth easy with a sudden, almost overwhelming explosion of flavours, his empty stomach singing praises despite the ache in his bruised jaw as he chews. He never thought he’d say this, but god bless Queens. “Catholic?” Castle grunts an affirmative. “Yeah, I have some experience with that.”

[mono-blogs-art]

I saw BABYMETAL live in concert in Milan last night!

It was SO awesome!!! It was definitely worth the 5 hour travel and organisation around it (& a great excuse to meet up with the bestie @transimailisa again <3) despite the cold and wet weather. Though we were a bit late to the queue (we arrived around 30min before doors opened?) we managed to get pretty good spots to stand, maybe around 10-15m away from the stage. When my view was not blocked by Every Tall Italian Man Ever, you could see the performers really clearly. I really had such a great time. I cannot overstate how good of a time I had.

I got into BM casually somewhere around 2020, obviously couldn't see them in concert because of the pandemic. So of course I immediately jumped from my seat when the EU tour was announced. I've been a jp idol fan for a while now and I've seen quite a few idol concerts, and I've also been to metal concerts now, so I wondered how their concert would be like (lmao) and if people would bring stuff like light blades etc. I saw one guy with a blade but apart from that it was just like any regular concert I've been to. The energy in the crowd was great, despite the language barrier so many people knew the songs and sang along, the call and response portions especially in Monochrome (beloved beloved beloved) were just... saur good. Mwah.

I think the most surprising thing to me (up til now pretty casual fan, have only seen a few live performances of some songs of theirs but never a full concert) was how... goofy they were? I always imagined them being this super serious trio with a hard exterior that never cracked, but my god those girls were having the time of their lives on that stage, it was really infectious. Especially Momo & Moa moved around the sides of the stage a lot, interacting with the audience, and they were laughing and headbanging along. Pris caught this (I was too busy going insane) but we think that somewhere in Megitsune Su fumbled a lyric or something, and the other two immediately bullied her for it and they were all laughing :D I guess that is a tradition that continues with other groups I follow lmao

In general it was such a great concert, great sound and a GREAT setlist with really high energy songs at the start (Gimme Chocolate, PA PA YA) and overall a fun mixture of old and new bangers. The only sad thing was that it was only just over an hour long, I would have loved 2 or 3 more songs and a proper Encore. Despite that, we all went home exhausted and happy from dancing and celebrating, and now that I'm back in my own cozy bed and thinking about the experience I can't wait to do it again!!

[aeirithgainsborough]

I haven't played the game but I've read spoilers for tlou2. Will the next season of tlou HBO even be worth it? I know Joel dies but are there any other characters that become lovable or is this Abby person at least a little likable? Asking you because I agree with all your takes on the show. Ty!

abby is a tumblr darling even tho she is a fascist and her section of the game is 12 hours of fetching things in a way that’s completely pointless to the plot, she barely shows remorse ever for her actions, she thinks ellie should b grateful to her she let her live after destroying her life, she’s the top soldier for her militia and is sad when she doesn’t have time to torture more ppl after she’s done with joel, she sleeps with her pregnant friends bf, doesn’t blink after slaughtering so many of the people in her militia she was loyal to the day before bcus of a kid who is meant to provide some sort of parallel to ellie/joel for her but is actually just rushed and can’t hit the same emotional beats whatsoever cus it’s been like… a day lmao… the narrative falls foul of telling us instead of showing us having abby say ‘you’re my people now’ which is hard 2 believe when a day previous she was making plans 2 destroy their home and loved 2 kill them. but she has muscles so a lot of ppl love her lol even tho she’s extremely bland, her gameplay is boring in the context of the plot and adds nothing to it (might have been more fun as its own game rather than coming after we’ve already played 12 hours and built up to a massive climax before suddenly being dropped back down to find ppl we know are dead and collect things… it’s a serious structural failure), and she’s barely remorseful and doesn’t really earn the redemption arc she’s given, especially not when the narrative tells us joel was too doomed to be redeemed when he’s been minding his business making guitars and wood whittling for five years in jackson and she at the end of 3 days with her when she’s meant to have evolved and realised violence is bad and her revenge didn’t achieve anything (except it does for her lol just not villain ellie!) and is meant 2 teach us all these lessons still just straight up murders ppl with glee, bonus points if they’re pregnant, beats the shit out of ellie without a slither of sympathy that she had ellie held down and heard her screaming and screaming for abby to stop hurting joel but carried on anyway even tho just finding her dad’s body is traumatising for her. ‘we let you live and you wasted it’ god i wanted to fucking shoot her myself cus she destroyed ellie’s life, took the person she loves the most brutally away in front of her, and it wasn’t a waste of abby’s life when she travelled 14 believable days across a dangerous post apocalyptic country for her revenge, and we are supposed to find empathy for her whilst she can’t find any of it for ellie lmao. the narrative props her up any chance it can whilst demonising joel and ellie, the characters we already love, trying to force you to like her in the most heavy handed and ham fisted way possible. oh she plays with dogs whilst ellie kills them!! good she’s still a torture loving fascist. but apparently she can be redeemed in 3 utterly unremorseful days and joel can go through the journey he does but is completely Hopeless and ellie is now the terrible villain of the tale. there’s a whole section that parallels the diner fight with david, this time positing ellie as the david villain to abby which is gross enough cus he was her tormenter and assaulter when she was 14, but also abby can kill who she likes and act like she likes and do torturing and murdering and the narrative never gives her this treatment or condemns her actions at all. anyway that’s a long way to say no she’s not likeable. yeah yeah the muscles, but again, she’s a fucking fascist.

honestly the other characters are fine, but they suffer in a plot in which the plot drives the characters rather than the characters driving the plot. they aren’t there for any other purpose than to move the plot and they can be a little bland for it. yeah dina is fine but she’s lumbered with this pregnancy plot so there can be some weird parallel to mel and largely doesn’t do much once you get to seattle and thus is very underdeveloped. jessie is also fine but underdeveloped too for the same reasons and he falls victim to neil ‘watch be me so diverse but poc are gonna die more than anyone else’ druckmann. all of them, new characters and old ones, continually make decisions that make you scratch your head and want to throw the controller away, again bcus plot > characters. it’s a poor way to tell a story. the characters should always drive the plot, never the other way around. it gets to the point when none of it justifies itself at all. but neil was so determined to tell his grimdark violent murderous hatred is as universal as love story that he was going to make it all fit no matter what and his characters and their motivations and characterisations fall to the wayside for it. it’s hard to find the ellie we fell in love with in part 1, let alone muster up enough energy to care about the side characters.

(as an aside neil is wrong about hatred being that universal and he thinks he’s right bcus he is a west bank settler and that alone should make you wary about season 2… the conflict in seattle is a mirror of the palestinian/israeli one and the narrative pushes on you this idea neil has that there are no wrong sides… but there is (half get to go home after a fight to a wealth of resources and land which they are trying to get more of and the other half has much less and can’t travel around the city unless they use secret bridges… idk if that sounds familiar to you) and you should all question why neil is pushing that. makes it even more hideous that he spent 25 hours propping up his wlf top soldier fascist and so many ppl lapped it up…)

maybe craig can fix some of these issues but im not holding out for it lol. some of the ways he’s talked about joel and ellie and the changes he made to the show are incredibly iffy. some of the ideas he has show he shouldn’t be allowed to talk about girls and their trauma ever again and he also thinks love can be as bad as it can be good which is such an ugly and stupid idea, especially when the whole point of part 1 is that love is what we have to hold onto when everything else is terrible. and no one come at me abt them being neil’s characters and his story cus BRUCE was there he co-created it and was the lead for the game lol.

anyway this got long im sorry no i don’t think it will be worth it.

[stinkyhyena9000]

Finally writing a post about this!!! Here's my ideas for a FutureAU for Sing

Note: by future, I just mean like a generation future, not like time travel future. (~20 years in the future)

So starting off, tw// for major character death, suicide

Almost all your faves are still alive thankfully. Also it does get incredibly angsty near the end, so have fun with that.

ALSO also, yes this does have shipping in it.

So first of all, this takes place like 20 years after the events of Sing 2 and the whole Redshore City incident. Buster Moon and Eddie Noodleman have finally retired. (Thank god no one has to put up with Buster's shenanigans anymore.) Also yes, they are finally a happy married couple, because of course they are.

Johnny is now the person who runs the theatre, with Buster kind of serving as his mentor, and his source of guidance whenever he needs help. The New Moon Theatre is now under Buster's name as opposed to Nana Noodleman's name. Why? You could probably guess. (She's dead). Oh yeah, you know who's also dead? Miss Crawly. They both had like super sad deaths, and died peacefully of age.

Oh yeah, there is also more death than this, but I'm saving that for the end.

I also honestly like to think Ryan took a dip in photography, so he also does that for the theatre. Go Ryan!

Anyways, Johnny runs the New Moon Theatre with the help of Nooshy and Ryan as well. Nooshy works as the choreographer, meanwhile Ryan is committed to being a malewife kinda acts as a new Miss Crawly + extra choreographer teacher if Nooshy is out. Johnny and Ryan definitely are together though by the way, and Nooshy teases them all the time for it still.

Oh yeah also in case it needed to be stated: yes, Johnny is stressed out all of the time (like usual), except also now he's constantly worried about his father and gang now. Despite their age and Johnny repeatedly offering to finance their retirement, they refuse to retire and continue running their mechanic business.

Buster and Eddie live in a new house, but Buster will occasionally convince Eddie to let him sleep nights at the theatre under the guise of "helping Johnny out for the day". Eddie does realize what Buster's try to pull, but let's him go with it because he knows it helps with his anxiety, since Buster can struggle to sleep sometimes without the familiar sounds of the theatre.

So where's Meena? Meena is currently on tour, much to the delight of her and her parents. She's a world renowned soul singer, and travels around with the husband Alfonso. Alfonso doesn't serve icecream anymore, but still cooks for them and acts as a handyman and stuff for Meena when they're on tour. They of course still make time to come back to the theatre every so often again, though.

Ash and Clay? Well, after the multiple reruns of Out of This Worlds, the two of them have been on tour for a years, before Ash decided to come back and crash at the theatre recently… without Clay. She always kinda reluctant to say what happened to Clay, with her story changing every time. First, it's that he got signed into a new record deal without her. Next thing you know, it's because he decided he wanted to go back to Redshore and focus on bettering himself mentally.

(By the way, Clay started therapy after the events of Redshore. Buster did too, thankfully).

In fact, this phantom has started haunting Clay only a few years after Ruby died. It just shows up randomly, serving as a grim reminder of who he's lost.

Okay so quick warning. Remember when I said it was gonna get angsty. Oh yeah, it's about time to get real angsty.

So basically, Clay killed himself a few years into touring with Ash. Let's just say therapy was not enough for the hell he was forced to go through mentally. Remember that ghost of Ruby during the performance of Out of This World? That's not new.

(That's why I'm calling this an AU, because this is less of a hc and more of a story idea)

Bonus: me writing down notes in my anatomy class ↓↓

┏╔══ ❀•°❀°•❀ ══╗

What structures are found within the muscle fiber

a. terminal cisternare ✓

b. sarcoplasmic reticulum ✓

c. myofibrils ✓

d. epimysium ✓

e. aponeurosis

f. triad ✓

g. t-tubule ✓

╚══ ❀•°❀°•❀ ══╝

[tonberry-yoda]

BRO, CONGRATS TO 900 FOLLOWERS!!! I CAN'T BELIEVE I CAN WITNESS THIS! I'M SO PROUD OF YOU!!!!

For the event can I request Okuyasu in a Duwang Gang Band AU, where he tries to flirt with girls but the girls only dote on Josuke, who's the most famous from the band and he's devastated, but reader, a great friend tries to convince him, that he's great? It can end romanticaly or platonicaly, it doesn't matter.

Sorry if this is really specific 😅

Hope you have a great day!

Band AU - Okuyasu

notes: OMFG THANK YOU SO MUCH YOUR WORDS EVERYDAY MEAN THE WORLD TO ME I CANNOT THANK YOU ENOUGH FOR ALL YOUR SUPPORT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! also i LOVE this idea! I kinda made it up along the way, so I really hope you enjoy it! Stay super hydrated lili and have a killer week! sending lots of love <333

word count: 504

You loved that the boys made a goofy band. It was just an idea in high school, but after you all graduated, Josuke actually said that you guys should go for it. You were busy with school and other things, so they just called you the roadie. Josuke sang, and had a wonderful voice, Okuyasu played the drums, Koichi played the guitar, and Koichi's girlfriend, Yukako, played the bass. It was funny that a stupid little dream became a reality.

You actually loved being the roadie too. You loved watching them on stage and getting to travel to fun places every now and again. But your favorite part had to be the fans. They weren't that big of a band yet, but they still had their little group of fans. Girls would squeal whenever Josuke would start singing and you would just be sitting backstage rolling your eyes. The fans doted over Josuke and thought that Koichi and Yukako were adorable. It just made you laugh a bit thinking about when Josuke was in high school trying to get a girlfriend, but was an awkward mess.

But you started to notice that Okuyasu was looking a little down at the most recent shows. He always got big cheers if he had a mini drum solo, but even so, no one talked about the drummer.

"What's been up, Oku?" You asked one day as the two of you were sitting backstage after the show, able to hear the squeals from girls crying over Josuke from outside.

"Nothing." He kicked over an empty can of soda on the ground and sat down on the chair next to you.

"Is it about Josuke?"

Okuyasu sighed and hesitated before speaking. "Y-Yeah. I just... I feel like I'm not even in the band."

"What do you mean?! Who would make the beat if not you?"

"I don't know. There are a lot of girls who squeal over Josuke because he's so talented." He sniffled and looked at the floor. "What about me?"

"Okuyasu, those fangirls might not see it, but I do."

Okuyasu looked up at you, his eyes shiny. "You do?"

You smiled. "Of course I do. You're funny and talented and-" You flushed almost spitting the word "cute" out of your mouth.

"And what?" Okuyasu tilted his head.

You cleared your throat and looked away from him. "Really cute." Your voice was almost a whisper, but he could still hear you.

"Y-You think so?!" Okuyasu stood up, his face a dark crimson. "You really think I'm cute?!"

You smiled and nodded seeing how excited he was.

"Well I think you're cute!!"

You giggled as Okuyasu ran over to you and gave you a huge hug. You gladly hugged him back, feeling all of his sadness wash away.

"You know, y/n. I don't need all those fangirls as long as I know my favorite roadie is with me."

You giggled and gladly took the kiss on the cheek Okuyasu gave you.

Yeah. You loved being their roadie.

~~~~~

jjba masterlist (2) | pinned post @tonberry-yoda