#also happy thanksgiving for those who celebrate. doing a lot of cooking today myself with family 👍 | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

dc41896 · 5 years ago

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Welcome to the Family

Hey guys! So this imagine was meant to be put out for Thanksgiving but as we see that didn’t happen lol. So although it’s a little late, I hope you guys like it and i also hope that for those who celebrate it, that you had a great Thanksgiving!! (PS: I wasn’t trying to follow a certain timeline so if things seem like they don’t make sense in that area, my bad I just pieced things together. Also his niece and nephew don’t have names because I didn’t know their names and didn’t want to give them fake ones because it of course wouldn’t be right so I just left it as is.)

Pairing: Chris Evans x Black Reader

Warnings: None (I feel like y'all already know it’s gonna be fluff lol)

Word Count: 2,461

“There. Everything looks good,” you thought as you looked at all the covered food on the table. You and Chris were hosting Thanksgiving dinner at his place with both of your immediate families coming over and needless to say, you were a bit nervous. Not only was this was the first time you guys were in charge of Thanksgiving, this was also the first time both of your families would be in the same area and you hoped everything would turn out perfect.

Dressed in your slightly oversized burgundy sweater with dark jeans and thigh high black boots, you make your way into the living room to see your boyfriend currently getting cookies out of the jar on the counter. “Hey don’t eat all of them, save some for the kids,” you jokingly scold placing the top back on. “Plus if you eat too much you won’t want any dinner.��

“Sorry mom,” he laughs as he kisses your cheek. “You look beautiful by the way.”

“Thank you, as do you Mr. Evans in your adorable old man sweater,” you smile brushing crumbs off the dark navy blue piece of clothing. “Thank you Ms. Y/L/N even though you just said I have on an old man sweater when we both know there’s nothing old about me,” he counters with a wink.

“Uh huh yea we’ll see when you’re passed out on the couch later with the game watching you,” you smirk as he lets out his signature boisterous laugh. “Ok that’s only happened once and you were right there beside me passed out so what does that make you then?,” Chris asks with arms crossed in front of his chest, mocking your smirk.

Before you could answer, you both hear the rattling of the doorknob followed by a couple knocks. “Chris and Y/N?! It’s us!,” yells his mom, Lisa, as she makes her way down the hall along with his other family members.

“Hey! Happy Thanksgiving everyone!,” you greet meeting them halfway. As you all exchange hugs and ‘Happy Thanksgiving’s’, you hear the doorbell ring signaling your parents and grandma had arrived, which also meant dinner could officially begin.

“I got it,” Chris says before lightly jogging to the front door. “Can we eat now Y/N? I’m hungry and skipped breakfast to eat as much as I can,” asked his nephew, an excited smile spread across his face.

“Yes of course you can! I finished heating up everything a few minutes ago so go ahead and fix your plates,” you answer leading everyone to the table. “Oh my gosh Y/N everything looks so good! I love how you’ve decorated,” Carly, his sister gushed, one child on her hip and the other close beside her.

“Thanks! Hopefully it tastes as good as it looks,” you reply with a small laugh. “As long as Chris didn’t make anything, we already know it’ll taste amazing,” adds Scott as he walks by making you and the rest of his family laugh.

“Hey I heard that!,” interrupts Chris walking in the dining room with your family. “There’s nothing wrong with my cooking.”

“No none at all if we’re talking about pizza rolls, popcorn, or anything premade that you just have to heat up,” interjected his other sister, Shanna, making the kids laugh and Chris roll his eyes.

“Don’t worry sweetie everyone starts out rough with cooking,” your grandma, Diane, reassures gently patting Chris on the arm. “At least you didn’t make the oven catch on fire.”

“Grandma! Lets not bring up my cooking misfortunes,” you respond with a laugh. “No grandma I think that’s a perfect topic of discussion!,” he counters with a smirk wrapping an arm around your grandmother’s shoulders as he leads her to her seat.

Seeing both families talking and enjoying themselves, as well as the food, made a nostalgic feeling come over you, and you were instantly reminded of your family coming together for the holidays to spend time together doing everything from watching Christmas movies to play board games. With everything that came with your career as a singer, it had been a couple years since you had a proper holiday season with your family. Of course you had Chris to spend them with since he wasn’t able to go home either, and both of you loved spending that time together, but you both agreed that finally being able to see your families and spend time with them was something you both dearly missed.

Noticing your unusual silence, Chris grabs your hand resting on the table and lightly kisses your knuckles bringing you out of your temporary trance. “Hey, you ok love?,” he asks with a whisper so only you could hear him.

“Yea I’m fine, just really happy and blessed right now to see everyone and get to spend this time together,” you answer with a soft smile. You tried to hold them back, but you couldn’t stop the tears from escaping your eyes and now your separate conversation had caught the attention of everyone in the room.

“Don’t cry Y/N! Here you can play with my doll to feel better,” his niece offers hurriedly walking up to you with her American Girl doll and making you smile as more tears flowed and, more than likely, ruined your makeup.

“What’s wrong sweetie? Do you need to go outside?,” asked your mom, Mary, as she rubbed your back, something she always did ever since you were a small child to make you feel better.

“I’m fine I promise. These are happy tears,” you answered using one of the many napkins handed to you by everyone at the table to try to clean up your face. “I was just telling Chris how I’m so happy to have all of you guys here and get to spend time with everyone. The past couple years we couldn’t really travel to visit anyone because of work and schedules so it really warms my heart to finally have everyone together.”

“Aww and we’re happy to be here with you guys! While you missed us you know we all missed you too,” Lisa responds reaching across the table to hold both yours and Chris’ hand.

“I know, I’m just super emotional today and I’m sorry for crying everyone. I didn’t mean to switch the mood,” you answer with a small laugh followed by everyone shaking their heads and saying “no” to reassure you that you didn’t do anything wrong.

“The holidays is especially time for family and to spend time together, which brings joy as well as other not so pleasant emotions at times,” your dad, Theo, speaks making everyone laugh. “Don’t feel bad for crying honey, we know yall love us and we love yall too.”

“And speaking of family,” Chris starts as he turns to look in your eyes and take your hands in his. “I want to thank you for making this amazing dinner for my family and yours as well as decorating and basically doing everything that we all know I can’t and would definitely struggle with if I tried to do it myself.”

In the corner of your eye, you could see Scott get up from the table with his phone in hand, but thought nothing of it since you were so focused on Chris and what he was saying.

“And I also want to thank you for bringing my family, from my mom down to the kids, into your heart and treating them as your own from the first day. I feel like a lot of people wait until things are official to do that, but you didn’t and showed me, and them, how big of a heart you truly have and I love you for that,” he continues, eyes red from the few tears that fell while he was talking, which you wiped away with your thumbs. “With that said, I wanted to ask you Y/F/N Y/M/N Y/L/N if you would do me the honor of marrying me, and not only making me the happiest man in the world, but also officially becoming an Evans and being part of this crazy family?”

Kneeling down on one knee, he pulls out a sparkling pear shaped diamond ring with smaller diamonds surrounding the centerpiece and around the band. You didn’t try to stop the tears from coming this time as you stuck out your hand while nodding your head.

“Yes! Of course I will!,” you excitedly answer as everyone around you clapped and cheered while he slid the dazzling piece of jewelry on your finger. Although you knew he was really supposed to be the only one on the ground at that moment, you couldn’t help yourself from kneeling down in front of him to kiss his lips.

“Way to make me bawl my eyes out after I just got myself together Evans,” you joke as he lets out a laugh, wiping away your tears. “I’m sorry love, but to make you feel better, you look just as beautiful as you always do future Evans,” he replies before kissing your lips again.

“Show us the ring Y/N!,” Shanna squealed, bouncing a little in her seat from excitement. Getting up from the floor, you reach your hand over the table to show everyone the immaculate ring shining against your skin. Now having time to really look at it, you realized that it looked very familiar, but couldn’t quite place where you previously saw it.

That is, until you looked at your grandmother, which caused your other hand to cover your mouth as more tears cascaded down your face and left your future in-laws slightly confused.

“Y/N made that look because she just realized that her engagement ring is a ring that her grandfather bought me a long time ago. She used to always look at it as a little girl and I would catch her playing dress up and wearing it sometimes so I promised her that when the time came, she could have it,” Diane answered blinking back a few tears of her own.

“With her permission, I had it updated with the smaller diamonds and made sure she liked the final product too,” Chris adds hugging you and kissing your forehead as your remaining tears stained his sweater. “What’s next are you surprising me with a puppy?!,” you ask causing everyone around to laugh.

“I don’t think Dodger would appreciate another dog taking away our attention. Would you boy?,” Chris answers bending down to pet the currently hyper dog seeing the emotions of everyone around.

“Ok I think this calls for a toast!,” announces Scott holding up his wine glass, followed by everyone else doing the same. “To Chris and Y/N, may there be many more holiday dinners just like this one filled with plenty of laughs and family.”

______

After everything from dinner was cleaned up and everyone was full, the talking moved from the table to the living room where the football game between the Patriots and the Cowboys was brightly displayed on the flat screen television. Of course Chris and his family were for the Patriots, whereas you and your family were for the Cowboys since that was your hometown team. Everyday leading up to this moment, Chris would tease you about how he’d be sure to let you cry on his shoulder once New England beat your beloved Cowboys.

However, he was pretty silent right now since Dallas was ahead by a touchdown. “Need some tissue love? You’re looking like you’re about to cry,” you tease pinching his cheek. “Here you can lean on my shoulder if you need to cry.”

“Very funny, but there’s plenty of time left in the game and I know we’re gonna come back,” he answers with a smirk. “Aww look at that, first lovers spat as an engaged couple! And to think Chris said all this was gonna happen when he first saw you Y/N,” Carly smiled, momentarily taking a break from playing with the kids.

“Wait you said we would get married when you first saw me? When did you first see me?,” you ask turning to look at your fiancé. “Hold up you didn’t tell her about your crush?! Oh this is good,” Scott shouts sitting up from the other side of the couch.

“I guess today is also completely embarrass Chris day,” Chris groans covering his face with his hands as he lays his head in your lap making you laugh.

“Okay so Chris had been a fan of yours since he saw your Grammy performance of Knew Better with Cardi B, and always wanted to meet you but wanted it to be natural and refused to let his team get in contact with yours. So fast forward to D23 where he was there for Marvel of course and he found out you were also there for your song for Forever Wonderland, and let me tell you he became a nervous wreck!,” he explains.

“Really?! You should’ve came up to me, I promise I probably would’ve been nervous too,” you answer playing with his hair.

“I was with him and tried to get him to go up to you, but he was all like ‘No she has enough going on, I’ll do it later’ and as you see it never happened. Then came the Oscars where your song was nominated and you were sitting down the same row as us, and I told lover boy that then was the best chance he would have in a while so he had to go for it,” Scott continues, ignoring Chris’ arm swatting at him to stop talking.

“So I’m expecting him to be like ‘No’ and all shy right, but he sits up a little straighter in his seat and tells me that I’m right and he has to get it done because he’s not missing out on his wife again. I was like ‘You’re wife? Since when?’ and he goes ‘Since Knew Better’ with the biggest smile and brightest eyes I have ever seen on him, and that is the story of how our dear Christopher Robert Evans knew he was gonna marry you Y/N,” he finishes with a smile as he nudges Chris’ shoulder.

Looking down, you notice his face and ears are as red as Rudolph’s nose, which make you softly giggle. “Babe that’s so sweet! In fact you want to know something? When I had to go up and perform and I saw you in the audience, something inside told me that you’d be in my life somehow.”

“And look at us now,” Chris responds as he turns to look up at you, softly caressing your cheek with his thumb. “Yea look at us now,” you repeat with a smile.

Taglist: @felicity-x0 @melinda-january @honeychicana @themyscxiras @crushed-pink-petals @lady-olive-oil @fumbling-fanfics @lovelymari4 @ellixthea @jojolu @jnk-812 @brwn-sgr @captainsamwlsn @nina-sj @itshinothey @wildfirecracker

If anybody else wants to be tagged, has asked to be tagged and doesn’t see their name, or only wants to be tagged for certain people I write for, just let me know! :)

#chris evans #chrisxblackreader #chrisxreader #chrisxwoc

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nisaadventures · 4 years ago

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I’m turning 30 in 10 days... yikes.

The last year of my life has sucked... lol. Okay, it wasn’t all bad. I’m exaggerating... but I’m also not. I know there were plenty of nice moments in the last year... but when I think about the last year of my life, its just full of so many firsts... awful firsts...

First time celebrating their birthdays without them...

First holiday season without them... anyone else miss mom’s turkey? Most people don’t like traditional thanksgiving dinner because the turkey is more often dry... mom’s was never dry... Okay the key people.. Don’t actually cook your stuffing in the turkey. Its just going to suck all the juice life out of your bird... I mean come on. Trick #1 stuff the turkey with fresh cut oranges and yes, you can leave the skin on... #2 do majority of the oven time in an oven bag to keep the moisture in. #3 cook breasts down. Its the part thats usually most dry, so duh... keep it in the juicy, buttery goodness of the pan. I never made the entire meal, I usually just helped mom with everything. These are just some things I’ve taken away in my observations.

Halloween trip to Disneyland without them... Disney is always a good time, but I’d be lying if I said my heart didn’t feel heavy in some way... and that is saying something because Disneyland is my happy place lol.

Looking forward to 2020... Hoping that it had so much better in store for us.

Dear lord... what a joke.

Going to Hawaii for our “family trip” without them...

A pandemic without them... I mean yes, I’m thankful they aren’t out there with COVID on the rise... I’m glad they’re not stuck at home because COVID. Mom and Michael are both too much of busy bees to be cooped up in the house for too long.

Not going to lie... picking up where they left has been hard. All of moms plants... The dogs.. Taking care of the backyard, where Michael usually would. Mom would definitely do too much at once. She’d be out in the yard planting something and pulling out something else in her damn UGG boots! wth mom?! Those are expensive! lol. “Oh its fine.. I’ll wash them.” Omg lol. Either that, or she’d be over here trying to move heavy a$$ pots by herself and I’d have to stop her before she hurt her back. Ayiyi.

Keanu and Aria’s birthdays without them... seeing my babies sad and missing their grandma, grandpa, and aunties has been hard. It will be out of nowhere sometimes... and all the nights of Aria waking up in the middle of the night crying. I feel you baby girl... I get it. I miss them too... Its okay to be sad... Mantras...

You were her little rays of sunshine. Grandpa and grandma loved you SOOOO much.

Mom would babysit the kids on Saturday mornings, while Kuya, Vaness, and I went to workout. They’d go get breakfast, pancakes and eggs, at UJs. She’d take them to Target, the dollar store, Walmart, etc. just so they could look and maybe get something to play with together. She always crafted with them.

Living in this house... especially with COVID... has been hard. I miss just sitting at the dinner table, eating sho mi, and talking about work. Mom and Michael getting all worked up over some crazy manager, or something going down with the union.. yup, that’s where I get it from... advocacy and leadership skills FTW. One thing they could always talk about for HOURS was work lol.

I remember when I was a little girl, Mom would let me play in the bathtub until I was all wrinkled. She would let me bring all my toys into the tub. At one point I even had a care bear doll that she, for some reason, let me take in the bath lol. She’d throw it in the dryer for me after I was done.

I remember going to the grocery store with mom and leaving with two full a$$ grocery carts because we had a full house at all times. I mean it was Kuya, my cousin Jojo, my brother Derric, my cousin John, Bubba, my cousin Jay, me and whoever else was over the house lol. When Kuya was in high school, it was all of his buddies partying at our house and crashing on the floor in the living room, dining room, and all the couches. She was the #1 host for sure.

“Are you hungry? Did you eat yet?”

Thats love.

All of Kuya’s high school friends called her Mom. My friends called her Mama Fern. She loved that.

I remember playing hide n go seek in the dark in our tiny town house.. Later in the bigger house on Glenbriar... where mom actually tripped and broke her arm... But she laughed so hard she peed her pants, so she was a good sport? lol. Needless to say, we sort of stopped playing after that.

I remember making dim sum with mom for the first time. Such a hot mess, flour and food everywhere, but so fun. We definitely didn’t do that again until there were more adults around to help lol. Mom knew how to run through a kitchen like a tornado. Hot mess! but the best cook.

Mom was always careful. She always wanted to make sure we were safe, that I was safe. I couldn’t go outside unless one of the boys was with me. When I would swim she would get nervous, even though I learned how to swim at a young age thanks to Kuya. One day, we were having a bbq, lots of family over, I was playing in the jacuzzi (drawing on the wall of the jacuzzi with a piece of chlorine... don’t play with chemicals kids lol) and she thought I was drowning? So she jumps her a$$ in there fully clothed and yanks my a$$ out. I was shocked as hell, so I naturally started crying hella hard and complaining about the fact that she scratched me when she yanked me up out of the water lol.

Keep in mind that that was not the first time one of the twins jumped into the pool fully clothed to “save” someone hahaha.

Speaking of fully clothed in the pool... The time auntie tripped and fell slo-mo style (that questionable, are you going to catch your balance, speed) into the pool LOL. Mom was dead laughing at her. Most hilarious video.

Those twins lol.

Jeeze.. speaking of the twins. They had this crazy connection. Tell me why when mom got sick with suspected viral meningitis and had to be hospitalized... Auntie straight up followed her right into the ICU with viral meningitis...

Who remembers their 50th birthday? Talk about doing it BIG. So much fun. All the performances. Lani was there... KMA performances and kuya and John getting down for Maglalatik. Who doesn’t like seeing some half naked, buff dudes, bang coconuts together? haha. The twins getting down with their hula performance. Cute!

I remember when Mom and pops were going through their divorce and she would text me after midnight. I was going to Sac State and of course I was team NO sleep at the time. I would be in the AIRC studying. I’d comfort as best as I could from a distance... and then come home on weekends to be there with her when I could.

She found her footing again. Started going to the gym with Kuya more... Started running all the time... all of her half marathons and finally she did the Nike Women’s Marathon.

Hiking Half Dome with her. What.a.badass.

That is really how I see her. She was so badass. When she was my age she had my 9 year old Kuya and I was on the way... She was working and supporting us and then eventually decided to make a better life for us, and went back to school... NURSING SCHOOL. wth. I can’t even imagine doing that right now, but reminding myself of where she has been and how much she PUT IN WORK... That keeps me grounded in the fact that we are responsible for our lives. If you want something, you have to work for it. You can’t just hope for better... you make better happen.

I guess its that reminder... her strength... her and Michael’s love and hard work... That keeps me going.

Being mindful... being thankful... acknowledging my own strength...

But with that said... August has been increasingly hard. I don’t like to think about my birthday. I don’t even want to plan anything. They’re not here... I can’t celebrate with all my loved ones and friends. Thank you COVID...

We’re just getting closer and closer to the anniversary? Nah.. lets not call it that... anniversary sounds like something nice... something to celebrate... This is NOT that. The day your loved ones are taken is not something to celebrate... I mean honestly, if I had to pinpoint the worst day of my life, that was it.... When I think about that day I can’t breathe. Terrible memories... so many sleepless nights. I’ve come so far. Its still hard, but I’ve come a long way.

Anyway... this post is sort of random and nostalgic. Things I hold onto. Things that make me happy cry... Things that weigh heavy on my heart.

Here’s my playlist for grief... reminders of them... collected over the last year:

Aloha for now -Kaleo Vai & Passion

One day at a time -Jennifer Chung

In the end - Gabe Bondoc, Melissa Polinar, Passion

Round and around -Kolohe Kai

Fade Away -Rebelution

Alive -The Green

New Day -Kimie’

Angels above me -Stick Figure

Memories -Maroon 5

Wish you pain -Andy Grammer

100 -Katchafire

Everyday life -Coldplay

Out of the darkness -Isla vista worship, Bre Reed

Amen -Andra Day

Grateful -13 Crowns feat. Poo Bear

Rainbow Connection -Gwen Stefani

Be okay -ZOE worship

With you -Eryn Allen Kane

Dont worry -Mesto feat. Aloe Blacc

Just livin’ -Sensi trails, Kbong

Remember me -Miguel, Natalia Lafourcade

Even more -Major

Let it be -Xav A.

Give Thanks -Iya terra, Stick figure

Mr. Sun -Sammy Johnson

Rest easy -Thrive, Nico of Tribal Theory

Sunny Days- Allen Stone

Today’s a new day -Common Kings

Mother’s Love -Jonah Jaxon, Micah G

The bones -Maren Morris, Hozier

Give you blue -Allen Stone

And we remain -Johnnyswim

Yellow -Kina Grannis

Streetcar -Daniel Caesar

Meant to be -Bebe Rexha, Florida georgia line

All you need to know -Gryffin, slander, Calle Lehmann

Like I’m gonna lose you -Jasmine Thompson

#ohanaovereverything #threeoh #grief #memories #family #loss

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gromvillage · 5 years ago

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all even numbers. do it coward

oh for fuck’s sake let’s go bois

2. Are you outgoing or shy?

depends on my mood and the situation, i feel like i’ve been a lot quieter lately

4. Are you easy to get along with?

i’d like to think so but i know that’s not completely true, i can be pretty stubborn about ideas i have in a group setting and always kinda take charge in situations

6. What kind of people are you attracted to?

people who care about me and respect me, people who are adventurous, literally anyone that can pick me up/is willing to carry me

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?

this guy i’m into right now but shouldn’t be cause he’ll probably never be into me lmao

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?

ohhh i don’t remember. i feel like recently i haven’t really had any deep conversations with anyone sadly

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?

ohhh really into the kids see ghosts album, a bunch of hobo johnson’s stuff, grrrls by aviva (this isn’t five songs but,,,,suck it)

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?

not really

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

prolly not

18. Do you still talk to your first crush?

don’t remember who my first crush was but i know i don’t talk to them anymore thank you, i had horrible taste when i was younger

20. Do you like your neighbors?

yeah!! most of them are pretty cool and i’m fairly close with them! there are a few that i’m not huge on but that’s life

22. Where would you like to travel?

oh all kinds of places. i want to go to antartica and the himalayas and the andes and the atacama desert and colorado and the sierras and all america’s national parks and tons of places in europe and mongolia and so many other places

24. Favorite part of your daily routine?

at the end of the day i like decompressing in my room and i also really love my art classes!

26. What do you do when you wake up?

check my phone (sadly), watch the news for like ten minutes, shower, pack my lunch/make something for breakfast, go to school

28. Who are you most comfortable around?

my close friends, though recently i’ve struggled a lot with my thoughts on my relationships with those around me

30. Do you ever want to get married?

it’s not a top priority but i think if i found the right person maybe

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?

ohhh boi there are many options.....timothee chalamet, bella heathcote, cara delevingne, russel wilson, harry styles, anothony ramos, tons of mountain athletes

34. Do you play sports? What sports?

i don’t play sports per say but i do a lot of stuff outdoors!! hiking, backpacking, wakeboarding, skiing, that kinda stuff

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?

oh hell yeah have you even met me i am constantly liking people and not telling them

38. Describe your dream girl/guy?

ummm kind the same answer as 6 but like someone who would be goofy with me and go on adventures and listen to me ramble about random shit and not get mad with me when i struggle with my thoughts

40. What do you want to do after high school?

hopefully go to college out west (fuck the south) and then get a job doing something outdoorsy!!

42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean?

i’m either tired, pissed, sad, feeling left out, or a mix of all of em

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?

ohhh tough but prolly go with space, there’s so much that we don’t know and also i wanna be weightless

46. What are you paranoid about?

oh lots of things, my parents finding out i’m gay, being abandoned by those close to me, ending up with everyone hating me, good stuff like that

48. Have you ever been drunk?

nope, not into that kinda stuff

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?

maroon! i stay wearing that color

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?

i think that i’m insecure about a lot of things and internalize that insecurity and let it stew, which is unhealthy and leaves me constantly questioning the world and people around me

54. Favourite store?

really any outdoor store

56. Favourite colour?

pretty partial to red but i also like kind of a forest green

58. Last thing you ate?

seasoned oyster crackers, those dudes slap

60. Ever won a competition? For what?

i came in third at our friendsgiving cook-off this past weekend?? i made bacon poptarts and it was cool to place cause i was competing against all adults who are pretty good cooks

62. Been arrested? For what?

negative ghostrider

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?

pretty sure it was this dude in like second grade on the playground, which is hella lame

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?

the only real tumblr friends i have are people i know in real life so,,,,

68. Twitter or Tumblr?

tumblr, though i’ve thought about getting a twitter recently

70. Names of your bestfriends?

wouldn’t you like to know weather boy

72. What colour are your towels?

i have some that are blue and some that are white

72. How many pillows do you sleep with?

one usually, but two if it’s sad boi hour

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?

oh i don’t know that i have any?? yeah don’t think i have any

76. What colour is your underwear?

today it’s kinda that boring peach tan color

78. Favourite ice cream flavour?

really love chocolate raspberry but i also love pretty much all tillamook ice cream flavors

80. What colour pants?

today they’re a dark khaki

82. Favourite movie?

maybe bill and ted’s excellent adventure?? they’re just out living life and aren’t super stressed about school (other than the part where it’s the whole plot) and also really dig their clothes

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?

haven’t seen either

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?

crush maybe? he’s just doing his thing and i dig it. also his voice is sick

88. Last person you talked to today?

@perpetualpatchwork!!

90. Name a person you love?

myself, sometimes

92. In a fight with someone?

at the moment no, though my brother and i argued a ton over thanksgiving break

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?

ohhh lots probably close to like 10 or 15

96. Favourite actress?

don’t really have a favorite but saoirse ronan is pretty cool

98. Do you tan a lot?

nah, i stay pretty pale throughout the summer though i do get nice freckles!

100. How are you feeling?

tired and stressed at the moment, but aren’t we all

102. Do you regret anything from your past?

oh yeah there are quite a few things

104. Do you miss anyone from your past?

there were a couple people i was close to in elementary and middle school i would like to reconnect with

106. Ever broken someone’s heart?

only my own

108. What should you be doing?

hella homework and getting ready for my scout meeting

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?

there have been a couple times,,,,

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?

my mom a couple weeks ago

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?

yep!! i have traveled the country quite a bit and was lucky enough to leave the country for the first time this summer!

116. Are you listening to music right now?

yeah, nirvana’s heart shaped box

118. Do you like Chinese food?

not hugely, i’d really like to try the authentic stuff though!

120. Are you afraid of the dark?

in some cases, mostly when i’m camping

122. Is cheating ever okay?

negative ghostrider

124. Do you believe in love at first sight?

how can you love someone you’ve never talked to?

126. Are you currently bored?

somewhat with my life, though there is so much i could do to try and improve it but i just don’t put in the effort and instead just complain

128. Would you change your name?

not really?? i liked to think about other names i wanted as a kid (tori was a particularly embarrassing one) but i’m pretty happy with my name now

130. Do you like subway?

i have to admit yes, it slaps when you’re on a road trip and stop and get a sandwich and then find a park or overlook to eat it at

132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

this is the same as number 10???

134. Can you count to one million?

i’m sure i could because i know how numbers work but i don’t think i would ever want to

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?

closed bruh gotta keep the monsters out

138. Curly or Straight hair?

oh it’s so freaking straight it doesn’t hold a curl at all

140. Summer or Winter?

winter, cause i can go skiing and sit by the fire and drink hot chocolate and cuddle up with blankets and wear jackets all the time

142. Favourite month?

big fan of december, though i like most of fall and the beginning of spring

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?

dark or milk, white chocolate is the work of the devil

146. Was today a good day?

ehhh not great, we been out here struggling with a lot of stuff

148. What’s your favourite quote?

i don’t know that i have a favorite but i like “be excellent to each other” from bill and ted’s excellent adventure, “anyone can cook” from ratatouille, and “the idea of wilderness needs no defense, it only needs defenders” from edward abbey

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page?

the book is my bullet journal and the first thing written on the page is monday from one of my weekly spreads, which isn’t a very exciting first line

#grom village replies #you kids really went off on me for these and i love you for it #i stay talking about myself

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escapingreality1992 · 5 years ago

Text

Secret Pen Pals Ch. 5

Keira’s POV

Thanksgiving showed up faster than expected. Meaning, I needed to pack for the trip to my parents’ house. It also meant I would live up to the promise to send a letter to Steve detailing my time spent with family. While packing, I made sure to pack the essentials like clothes, toiletries, and the like. In two separate bags, I made sure I packed the beginnings of Steve’s blanket, plus the writing items I needed to send him something. If anyone asked, I could pass it off as getting back into writing. Who knew? Perhaps I could work out something anyway.

Once I was packed, I hailed a cab to JFK airport, my flight being at 12:10 p.m. I’d arrive in Greensboro close to two and at my parents’ around 2:30 or 3 depending on the traffic with it being Thanksgiving. The thing about me is that I tend to get to some places early, arriving at the airport two and a half hours earlier than my flight. Most people did this anyways, preparing for delays in security and checking in luggage. Not too surprising, given that it was busy during the day itself.

It only gave me an excuse to sit down and read in my boarding gate. This time it was a book I needed to read for a book club I joined a few days ago. Unfortunately, this particular book bored me; I guess I could attempt to get it over with while sitting here. It would allow me to move onto the next Dresden Files book on the plane. As it happens, the goal was achieved and I wrote up a quick review about the book; Where the Crawdads Sing, one of the most hyped-up books this year. Not my favorite, a little slow, and a bit shocking at the end.

I guess I couldn’t figure out why everyone loved it, but then that’s their own opinion. I’m not going to condemn them just because I didn’t like it. It didn’t live up to my own standards, but I have always had weird tastes to begin with. It’s not like people can’t enjoy the book, but I didn’t really care for it and that’s okay.

Satisfied with the review, I shut down my laptop and put it away, tuning into the next book of interest. I didn’t get very far into it when they called us to board, a full flight; thank goodness I brought my earbuds to tune out the surrounding noise around me. I breathed a sigh of relaxation as the plane glided through the air, reading taking over any unnecessary thoughts roaming around in my mind. The only ones that sought out freedom from the story playing out before my eyes were the ones about Steve.

How would he celebrate the holiday? Would it be with friends or family? If we had met, would he travel with me? Meet my family? Would he invite me to spend it with his? A small smile tugged at my lips at those thoughts when they popped up, enjoying them and the scenarios that came with them. I imagined my parents and the rest of my family welcoming him with open arms.

Dad would probably grill him about his intentions and try to find out every little detail about him. Mom would talk his ear off, making subtle remarks about marriage. These scenarios prompted a giggle from my throat, silenced by the look I caught from the person sitting next to me. Wouldn’t it be lovely if Steve was by my side at this moment?

We landed and I waited for people to get off the plane to head to baggage claim. Before I booked the tickets, I had gotten Dad to agree to pick me up from the airport and planned on meeting him outside in the carpool lane of the PTI airport to return to their home.

“Hey, daddy. Happy Thanksgiving,” I greeted him, handing off my suitcase to be put in the trunk of the car. The other bags were put in there as well before he embraced me in a tight hug.

“Hi, honey. Welcome home. Everyone should be arriving at 3 for dinner. Did you have a nice flight?”

“Yeah, it was fine. Full, but fine,” I told him, getting in the passenger side and closing the door.

“It is Thanksgiving. It’s to be expected. Your mom is excited to see you and I imagine Newt will want to see you as well,”

“He’ll tackle me and then lick me to death. Still, I’ve missed the big furball,”

“Just a heads up, Keira. I’m sure your grandmas will want to know about what you’ve been up to. They’ll want to know about your love life, so expect a lot of questions,” Dad warned me.

“Wonderful. I can’t wait,” I grumbled, my happy mood now dampened. I was under the illusion that I’d get through the holidays without more people wanting to get involved in my life. It appeared everyone wanted nothing but to invade how I was getting on with it; if I was dating, where I was heading in my career, if they could offer any unwanted assistance. If only I could become invisible to avoid all the pestering.

“You’re staying until Monday, right?” Dad asked, getting off the subject of the impending interrogation I’d be receiving upon the arrival of other family members.

“That’s the plan. Unless I decide otherwise,” I answered. If things. If things went awry, I wanted to fly home immediately, avoiding the crushing drama, which happened each time our family got together. If things appeared normal, then I’d stay, enjoying the company of my parents. It’d all depend on everyone’s attitude and if they chose to piss me off, intentional or not.

“Alright. You’re in your old room. Not much has changed, except we repainted the walls this summer,” Dad stated.

“Thanks, Dad,” We pulled up to their two-story house and parked behind the second car they owned. He helped get my things out of the trunk to carry them inside; scraping claws sounded from the living room to the kitchen where we were entering, followed by a loud bark. A giant German Shepherd jumped on me, the force of his weight making me stumble back a little.

“Newtie! Hey, buddy. Who’s a good boy? Newt is. I’ve missed you Newtie,” I stated, pushing his front paws to the floor and petting him as he spun around in circles. He sat and the proceeded to lay down in the middle of the floor for me to rub his belly. I dropped to my knees to give him the attention he wanted before getting up to place my luggage in my room for the weekend. I unpacked and found my brush, running it through my long hair, getting the tangles out from it getting bunched up on the plane. A knock sounded at my door and I turned to face my mom.

“Welcome home. I trust you had a good flight,” she greeted me. I nodded and walked over to hug her.

“Happy Thanksgiving,” I told her.

“Others will be arriving soon. Come on down,” she said, letting go and exiting the room. I sighed and descended the steps, preparing myself for the dinner of possible drama. At least, I could count on Newt to keep me in a good mood.

Steve’s POV

Sounds of things being banged around roused me from sleep; a section of blonde hair falling in front of my eyes when I sat up. My first thought is someone was breaking in and I needed to go help resolve the situation. Not caring if I attacked them without a shirt on, I bolted from bed and sprinted downstairs, ready to spring into action.

Listening for where the noise was coming from, I follow it to the main dining room, trying my best to be stealthy. I peek around the corner to find Thor, Wanda, and Tony hanging Thanksgiving decorations. Standing straight from my crouched position, I walked in to address what is going on.

“Tony? Thor? Wanda? What are you guys doing?” I asked, confused as more decorations are put into place on the walls.

“Thanksgiving. I’ve invited a few people over to eat. It’ll be kind of a big family feast. Strange will be here as well as Wong, not to mention it’ll be good to have a break from things for a few days,” Tony stated, moving chairs down to make more room at the huge conference table we held meetings at.

“Thanksgiving. Right. I didn’t realize that was today. Do you need help with anything? I could grab supplies at the store. Maybe cook the turkey,” I said.

“You can go with Natasha for the food and help cook. We’ve got the decorations covered. I might suggest you put something on that isn’t sweatpants though,” he responded to my question. I nodded and returned to my room to change into a gray shirt, jeans, boots and my favorite leather jacket. I met Nat downstairs by the entrance.

“Ready to go?” I asked her, receiving a shake of her head.

“We’re waiting on Bucky. Don’t get mad, but I’ve invited him because I think you should tell him about…her,” She told me.

“Nat. I’m not sure I need to tell anyone else about Keira,” I argued.

“Steve, he’s your best friend. He should know. In case you need him to talk about her with. Besides, it’s not like he’s going to tell anyone else,”

“I’ve got you, don’t I?” At the quirk of one of her eyebrows, I sighed, rubbing a hand over my face.

“Alright, fine. I’ll tell him. Only him. I don’t want anyone else to know. Not until after we’ve met. Not until I know for sure,” I said. She smiled, patting me on the arm. A minute later, Bucky joined us, and we walked out to one of the SUVs in the garage. Natasha drove us to the store we normally shopped at, my heart hammering at the thought of telling someone else about the letters and Keira.

“Wait, wait, wait. You mean to tell me you’ve been writing to a complete stranger? A woman named Keira. And you didn’t tell me?” Bucky said when I revealed the secret to him.

“Yeah. I tried to keep it secret until Natasha discovered one of the letters. Tony technically saw one first, but I grabbed it before he had a chance to ask any questions,” I answered. I carded a hand through my hair, a bit nervous about his next reaction. He pulled a couple of bottles of wine – both red and white – from the shelves and placed them in the shopping basket with the other supplies we acquired.

“Why?”

“Why keep it a secret? I don’t know. I-,”

“No, why didn’t you tell me? You know I don’t judge, and I don’t spill secrets. Why didn’t you say something?” Bucky asked, his expression turning to anger.

“I guess I wasn’t sure how long it would last. I didn’t expect to develop feelings. It just sort of happened. I feel connected to her in ways I never knew existed. This is nothing I’ve ever experienced before. Especially not with Peggy when we interacted,”

“How long? How long have you been writing to her?”

“A few months. Since September. It started as an event from a bookstore. No deadline, but I thought after the first letter, we might stop, get bored. Except her first letter drew me in and I found I didn’t want to stop corresponding to her.

The second letter made me realize I wanted more. After the third, I knew I needed more. The last one I sent to her, I knew I wanted to meet her,”

“A few…Steve, you should’ve said something. Especially, if you think you’re falling for this girl. Have you looked into her? Found out who she really is?” Bucky said, tossing in blocks of cheese when we approached the deli department.

“No, and I don’t want to. Something about her words makes me feel I can trust her. You can’t tell anyone. Please, Buck. I’ll tell them eventually. After I meet up with her, once I know for sure she’s the one I want. The letters are wonderful, but I’d like to see what happens when we actually meet face to face,” I replied. He raked a hand through his hair, taking in what I said, a sigh escaping his lips.

“I’m not saying anything to anyone, I promise. When will you see her?”

“After the holidays. I would like to start the new year right. Create new beginnings. See how things go. I’ve sent her this request. I have to wait to see her response. Of course, there’s the possibility that she won’t respond if she feels I’ve crossed a line,”

“What happens if you meet before the holidays are over? Will you be prepared for it? Will you be prepared if things don’t pan out the way you want them to?” he asked.

“Don’t worry about me. Everything will be okay, whether Keira and I connect more or not. Let’s just get through Thanksgiving,” I stated.

“If they don’t end up together, we can always set him up with someone else,” Natasha chimed in, throwing in packets of gravy. I managed to nod and chuckle at her comment, secretly hoping Keira and I would work out, so that didn’t happen.

We finished up shopping, returning to the compound to prepare the feast. Tony told us guests would be arriving around 5, leaving us plenty of time to get everything together and to change into nice attire – I changed into a dark blue, button up shirt, black trousers, and black leather loafers to complete my outfit – celebrating with our huge family.

Often, I found myself wandering to thoughts of Keira; how she was getting along with her own family, if she was thinking about me, how, if she were here, would she get along with my own version of family. I’d look at Natasha and Wanda with their arms around each other kissing or Tony and Pepper gazing at each other with adoration and wonder what Keira would feel like in my arms.

Even Strange had brought a date and the same pang of loneliness I felt at the benefit returned; I shoved it away taking in the happiness of the group around me. I was loved by many, my friends always being there for me. Bucky was even like a brother to me. It didn’t stop me from wanting to be loved by her, by Keira. I knew she had gone to North Carolina. Again, as I approached a window, peered out of it, glancing at the stars, I thought of her.

Meanwhile, in Greensboro

Keira’s POV

During one part of the night of Thanksgiving, I drifted over to one of the windows and peered up at the stars, lost in thought, already broken away from conversations with those who were there. Other members of the family showed up; first my mom’s mother who I called Mimi, then dad’s side – his brother Andrew, my aunt Kelsey, my cousin Callie and her son Jonathan, plus my dad’s mother – Grandma Luanna, all being on time to the feast.

As expected, everyone inquired into my life, asking about if I was seeing anyone and my career, which all in all wasn’t too bad. It appeared to die down when food was ready, and everyone sat down to eat. Still, I wanted to disappear, to write to the one person I wanted to talk to. The one person I wished was here. Later when everyone has cleared. When my parents have gone to bed, I thought. I knew if I left for too long, questions would be asked, secrets would be discovered.

Feeling the need of a brownie, I strode over to the counter and piled three of them on a plate and sat down at a table before Callie came over. Currently, as I nibbled on the brownies, a conversation was held between the two of us about New York.

“I wish I could’ve gone with you. It’d be nice to have my own place. Especially in New York,” she said.

“It’s not too bad. It’s prettier in Fall and Winter,” I said, taking another bite of the chocolate treat.

“So, you haven’t found anyone yet? To date, I mean?”

“Please, not this again,” I groaned.

“Why not? You’ve been up there for two years and no one’s asked you out? Not even any of the Avengers? Like Tony Stark?” she pressed.

“He’s engaged, Callie. It wouldn’t work even if he wasn’t. He seems nice, but he’s not really my type,”

“Stephen Strange?”

“I thought you didn’t like him because of his supposed arrogance. Alas, no, he hasn’t. I’m not really in his world though. He’s kind of hot, but I don’t usually date someone based on looks. Trust me, I’ve seen his pictures before and after the accident,”

“Thor? Captain America?”

“No and no. Callie, don’t worry. I’m okay.

“You don’t want a boyfriend? Aren’t you lonely?” she asked, the last question hitting home. Sure, I was a bit lonely, but I didn’t think any of the Avengers would be the right choice. Maybe Captain America, but I would like to get to know the man behind the mask and costume. Not that I knew his real name. I’d like with that anyone, really. I liked to get to know the people I dated before I dated them. I fell for personalities, not necessarily looks. I was a firm believer that someone could be good looking but could end up being a jerk.

Steve was one I really enjoyed finding out about, getting to know. He appeared to be warm and gentle; a captivating soul. Not to mention he made feel warm inside.

“Don’t tell me you’re interested in women. Is that why you dismissed the men I offered?” Callie asked, a look of disgust on her face.

“No. Of course not. I’m a little lonely, but I’m not in any rush to get married right now. When I meet the right one, I’ll be sure to tell you. By the way, there’s nothing wrong in liking women,” I told her, annoyed by her attitude. Callie scoffed and changed the subject before we joined everyone else. The celebration lasted a few more hours, going until around 8 when everyone went home, leaving my parents and me alone for the rest of the evening. We mainly watched movies, the cheesy kind in which everyone lived happily ever after. You know, like Hallmark movies.

Around midnight, my parents retired to bed while I crafted a new letter to Steve.

Steve’s POV

“Explain to me why you’re still single. You could have any woman you want and yet you haven’t found one single girl to date. To settle down with,” Tony stated, knocking me out of my thoughts.

“I don’t know Tony. I’m not rushing into anything. You know how I am. I like to be friends with people, or women, before I do anything,” I said, crossing my arms over my chest.

“I still think you would have found someone by now,”

“It’s not that easy. Plus, we’ve been busy these last couple of weeks, not to mention all of the years we’ve been fighting enemies,”

“I don’t think you’re trying hard enough. Maybe-,”

“Tony, leave him alone. He’ll settle down when he’s ready. It took you years before you found Pepper,” Natasha cut in. Tony surrendered and the subject was dropped. I mouthed a thank you to Nat and tuned into the funny stories everyone was sharing. The night started becoming late, coming up around 1 a.m. and soon Strange, his date, and Wong returned to the Sanctum.

One by one, people left to return to their rooms, giving me leave to go to mine. I picked up a book, deciding to read for another hour, but kept losing interest. My attention kept wandering to my desk where my notebook lay, a letter waiting to be crafted. It’s not that I was afraid to write another one, but after the last one I sent, I wasn’t sure if I should write one. What if Keira had decided I had crossed a line and wanted to cut off communication.

Write her, Steve. You can still be friends with her, I thought. Closing the book, I walked over to the desk, crafting a new one. I stuck to asking about how she celebrated Thanksgiving and wishing her a good one. I tried not to confess my feelings to her again, instead telling her about Bucky and Natasha, followed by some fears I had. I even wrote her a story with warmth, an imagined scenario I wanted to happen between us.

Four Days Later

Our routine hadn’t returned during the rest of the week, allowing us the freedom to do what we wanted. I still went out for runs, the cool air distracting me from waiting by the mailbox for another letter from Keira. I managed to stay out of the compound as some of the couples were being a little loud with their own activities.

Even Bucky and I hung out at coffee shops and movie theaters to get away from it all. In fact, I had ventured out to a coffee shop this afternoon to relax and read, returning in time with the mail truck, approaching the box after the mail man had left a stack of mail in it. Thumbing through the stack, I found the one I was looking for. I strode inside, leaving the rest on the coffee table. No one was home except for Bucky, leaving me to look at the contents of the letter without anyone being nosy.

I threw it down on the bed, pacing back and forth. What would be her answer? What did she think of me now? I picked up the letter immediately putting it back down, nerves encompassing every part of me. I ran a hand through my hair, squeezing the back of my neck as I stared at the envelope. Unable to bear the unread contents, I sat down in the middle of my bed, opening it with shaking fingers and pulling out the paper within. Taking a deep breath to steady my nerves, I unfolded the letter and started reading.

Steve,

Believe me when I say you haven’t crossed any lines. Thank you for the confession. Truth be told, we’re on the same page. I believe I’m falling in love with you too. Your words have me made me feel like nothing I’ve ever felt with anyone before.

I can’t stop smiling every time I receive something from you. I feel more alive, more confident when I write to you. I feel I’m a lot braver when writing, the words flowing like water on these pages. I think it’s time we meet. See where this goes. I agree with your suggestion. Let’s meet after the holidays. Start fresh with a new year.

Start somewhere small. Maybe coffee or lunch. Or maybe a movie. Do you want to set a date and place to meet? Would you like me to? I can send over my schedule and you can send me yours to figure it out.

“She wants to meet. Keira said yes to meeting,” I stated out loud and in shock. A wave of happiness washed over me next, my lips stretching out in a huge grin. I’d have to get with Tony to figure out some sort of schedule and find out a good time to get together with her. I wanted lunch to spend as much time with her as possible. Maybe we could stretch it out into a dinner. I continued reading, interested in every word.

Perhaps, you’re also right. Maybe fate will have us meet earlier. Still, I think a plan should be made in case it doesn’t happen. I want to see you, to touch you, to feel your skin against mine. I imagine you’re warm and gentle. Your words alone have me thinking it. I have no doubt we’ll be happy when meeting. I believe we’ll get along great.

Yes, I watched the storm. I believe I said so in my last letter. My power went out and I resorted to candles when it was over. It’s funny and lovely that one storm brought a connection between us, drawing us in. It’s not only the letters, but nature must be telling us something. Maybe we’re meant to be.

I loved your list of favorites. For your next musical, once you’ve watched Rent, you should give Phantom of the Opera a try. The movie is beautiful. So is the show. I saw it live in Vegas a couple years back. Reduces me to tears every time. I’ve always loved the Phantom even though some of the choices he makes are awful. I’ve seen the Goonies. It’s fantastic. It took me a while to see it, though. I thought it was something different than it was. I…I’d like to have your arms around me. Especially, during the Winter.

Some country singers I think you might like are Lady Antebellum, Dan + Shay, Hunter Hayes and Kip Moore. They’re pretty good and have some softer songs I think you’ll enjoy.

As you can probably see from the address on the front of this envelope, I’m at my parents for Thanksgiving. Things weren’t as bad as I thought. Yes, they grilled me again, but at least it didn’t last the whole night. Of course, I’ve discovered I can’t drink a whole lot if I haven’t had that much food. I had a killer headache towards the end of the night, but I took Advil to make it go away. It gave me enough focus to write to you. I’m writing late at night, as when everyone left to go home from my parents’, we watched cheesy Hallmark movies until they went to bed.

This got a small laugh out of me. I imagined doing this with her next year, one arm draped over her shoulders, the other linking with her fingers. We’d be buried under one of her blankets, our bodies close.

Want to know something interesting? I found myself over at a window glancing up at the stars, thinking of you. I thought about what you were doing, how you were celebrating Thanksgiving. What it would be like to have you here with me.

Oh FYI, I’m here for four more days, so I may not get your letter until I get back to Brooklyn. It’ll be worth the wait, though I really want it much sooner. We need to meet, soon if possible. I miss you even though I haven’t seen you yet.

Until next time. Until we meet. Please write soon.

Waiting for you,

Keira

Tears welled up, a couple escaping down my cheeks. Clearly, we were more connected than we thought. Both of us were drawn to a window, both of us thinking of each other. A soft knock echoed at my door; I quickly wiped away the tears from my cheeks and blinked back the others that threatened to fall before I answered the door.

Behind it stood Bucky, who seemed to want to invite me somewhere. He took one look at my face and worry crossed his features.

“Everything okay?” he asked.

“Everything’s fine. Did you need something?”

“Danvers texted. She wanted to invite everyone out to drink and play darts at our usual bar. Want to come?”

“Sure. Let me grab my jacket and put shoes on,” I answered, turning back inside my room. I put up the letter and placed it in the box I had the others.

“Keira again? Did you get the answer you wanted, or did she reject you?” Bucky asked, once I got my jacket on and stuffed my feet in my shoes.

“I received the best answer one could get. She wants to meet. Turns out we’re more connected that I thought. Let’s go before everyone gets suspicious,” I told him.

“You’ve got it bad for this chick. I can only imagine what will happen when you finally meet her,” Bucky said. He was right. I had major feelings for Keira, and they would only grow stronger once we came in contact with each other.

Monday Night

Keira’s POV

I got back to New York around 8 p.m. and took a cab back to my apartment after picking up my luggage. I made a stop at my mailbox to pick up the missed envelopes and magazines I had gotten while away, taking the elevator to rummage through them.

My fingers landed on one special envelope, the address and name standing out. Steve. I smiled, eager to open it, waiting until I got into my apartment before I did so. I didn’t even make it to the bedroom before my fingers were under the edge of the envelope and pulling out the paper inside it. I sat down on the couch, pulling off my boots and began reading.

Keira,

It’s Thanksgiving. Something I forgot about until this morning. I almost attacked a few of my friends when they were setting up for the feast. You’d probably love them. Especially Wanda, who is a sweet girl. She’d love to watch movies with you, and she loves animals. Thor would wrap you into a bear hug because everyone says he’s a giant teddy bear.

Thor? He’s friends with an Avenger? I thought, recognizing the name right away and the next after.

Tony will talk your ear off about technology but he’s fun and intriguing. Anyway, a couple of us went to the store to pick up supplies to help out with the huge dinner. There’s a bunch of us attending the dinner and my friends are practically family since my real family passed away a while ago. Though, I wouldn’t trade this family for anything. I’d only introduce someone new to the group. I’d love to introduce you to this group.

Thanksgiving was enjoyable. We drank and ate a lot, having fun talking and hanging out. At one point, I went over to one of the giant windows we have here at home and looked out to the stars. My first thought was about you and where you were at that very moment. I knew you were in North Carolina of course, but I kept asking myself if you were at a window as well, staring up at the stars or if you were talking to someone you love.

I know I haven’t received your answer yet, but I still want to meet. I still want to see your gorgeous face. I’m being patient and I’ll gladly accept any answer you give even if…it’s a no or you don’t want to write anymore.

I’ll accept it even if it kills me, but it’s ultimately your choice. I only want your happiness, even if you might not want it with me. Based on your last letters, I feel that you want this, but I could be reading into it wrong.

Believe me, I want this. I want you, but you’ve sent this before you’ve gotten mt answer. You’ll be in for a surprise, I thought. I kept reading, soaking in his words.

I hope your Thanksgiving went well. No drama, no judgment. I hope you enjoyed your fill of turkey and dessert. As I sit here, I find I want to know what you’re thinking about. What you’re doing. Are you asleep? Are you wide awake? Are you writing to me or are you working on something original? Will you write me something you’re working on? Write me something that came from your imagination.

Send me something beautiful. Send me something romantic, though your words are just that. Send me something that speaks volumes of your soul. Something from your heart. Let me see it, let me feel it, let me hear your heart. Each beat, each color of your soul. Please?

You asked me to tell you about my oldest friend. His name is Bucky. Well, technically speaking, his full name is James Buchanan Barnes, but I’ve always called him Bucky. He’s my closest and we grew up in the same area. He’s the one that immigrated here. He’s originally from Romania in case you were wondering. Both of us grew up poor, but we got by when we could. We had our friendship too, which is nice. He was there when my parents died and has been by my side ever since.

He’s sweet and kind. He’s been through a lot though, but still has a kind soul. I feel like you two would get along great. You’re both gentle and loving. He’s the same one who made me get on the Cyclone at Coney Island and I threw up afterwards. He’ll most likely be the first person I’ll introduce you to after we meet…if we do meet. Bucky is the one I talk to most.

Apart from Natasha. She’s sweet too, but she’s got a fiery attitude. A good thing, a Natasha thing. She’s currently dating Wanda, a romance I don’t think anyone expected to happen. They’re happy together and that’s all that matters. In love, in fact. Their relationship blossomed extremely well.

I wonder if he’s friends with the same Natasha, I met a few weeks ago, I thought.

I don’t have a story to keep you warm at night. At least not something real. I can only give you a scenario involving us. I’ll try my best to give you something you can picture in your mind.

Close your eyes after reading this.

Imagine us in a cabin during the Winter months. It’s just us, no one else. It’s snowing. Not heavily, but it’s gentle, beautiful. Like you. Maybe it’s Christmas, maybe not. We’re sitting on a couch or bed, curled under a couple of your blankets. You’re pressed close to me. My arms are around you, your head is on my chest, my lips pressed into your soft hair as I kiss you there. Soft music is playing in the background, a fire crackling in the fireplace near us, surrounding the cabin in warmth as well as the blankets; as well as our bodies close together.

I lift your chin up to give you a kiss on the lips. It’s soft but lingers after a few moments. Even once we’ve pulled apart from it, your olive-green eyes gazing into my light blue ones. You snuggle closer, link your fingers with mine. We don’t even have a book. We’re reveling in each other’s company, enjoying the snow, the sound of the crackling fire, sharing kisses. Talking, loving one another.

I close my eyes once I’ve read it all. Re-live it in my head. It’s a lovely view. Something I desire to happen between us. Steve’s painted a beautiful picture and I release a sigh, wishing it was real. To have him sitting here with me, to have his lips on mine. I open my eyes to read the rest of the letter.

Can you see it? It’s not much, but it’s what I have. Something I’ve thought about before. Something I’d love to happen.

My fear right now is that we’ll never meet. That you won’t want to. I’m trying to stay positive. Other fears include losing those I’m close to, the world coming to an end. A world where you’re not in it. I fear that most of all.

Patiently waiting for you,

Steve

I can see it, Steve. I want it, I thought. I knew I was in danger of falling for him. Eager to set up a day to meet after the holidays, I checked my schedule for January. There were two weeks I was booked with dogs, but the 16th through the 20th, I would be free. Even some days towards the end of the month had some availability.

Fate would have other plans in mind that we wouldn’t foresee in the form of coffee. As if it wanted us to meet sooner and fall faster. If I must fall, then I’d gladly fall for Steve Rogers.

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infinite-insignia · 5 years ago

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((I uh. made an edgy moodboard for myself. also a vent/rant under the cut.))

(( wasn’t exactly in a super angsty mood earlier but then I thought abt things and my brain went “man I really was a horrible person huh” so basically this is a representation of my edgy kin thoughts whenever they resurface. not even joking, some of the quotes are p accurate. especially the “killed my old self but the new me isn’t much better” one cause it reminds me of my death and honestly yeah. that was totally my doing. tryna be a better person in this life but I guess I can’t do that. I mean it didn’t work back then, why would it work now. tho if I give up on remembering my last life, I’d be giving up on what’s p much my purpose in this life. remember everything and use that knowledge to (try to) better myself before this human body gives out and this soul fades. cause I don’t think this soul’s gettin reincarnated again. not like I have another shot at remembering everything. but everyone tells me to stop focusing on the past. that it doesn’t define me now. but tbh? it kinda does at this point. the human life I’ve lived? yeah that was normal before I remembered what I was last time. and now it’s all I think abt--and to be told to stop thinking abt it? to be called delusional over it? to have people try and prove me wrong by telling me how I lived my life--or, worse, by saying it never even happened? it hurts me emotionally. like,,,deeply hurts me. I wanna talk to people abt things so I know someone’s listening. that someone cares enough to at least attempt to understand. even fake understanding would be enough cause I’d believe it was real. I’d have someone to talk to outside of tumblr, at least. sure, my psychologist knows a bit abt this stuff, but I only see her once every other week--and not this week. so I can’t talk to her. can’t talk to my mom cause she doesn’t understand and I know for a fact we’d end up arguing. she’s said it before--she wants her kid back. this messed-up delusional freak who brings past lives into their current one apparently isn’t her kid--but that’s who I am. that’s what I do. even among people like me, I feel alone. I can’t talk to anyone and it’s driving me nuts--but at the same time I’m terrified to talk to people because of the reactions they could have. I can talk abt it on here but to you guys it probably just seems like lame, delusional ranting. so I might as well shut up before I start to look like even more of a whiny bitch, huh. I say that despite knowing it’s hard to shut up once I start talking. ugh. man I went from 0 to 100 real quick in terms of bad moods. and it’s not even a bad mood? like I’m upset, yeah. but it doesn’t exactly feel like stress, it feels more like,,,emptiness. like I’ve dealt with this shit enough that I’ve figured there’s no point in stressing over what’s gonna happen every few days or so. my brain wants to mistake this emptiness for calmness--but I’m not calm. I’m not happy, I’m not content, I don’t even know what I’m feeling. I’m a freakshow brought into another life for god knows what reason. Phantom Ruby shouldn’t have had the power to reincarnate me but it somehow did. Ruby itself is here too somehow--it’s just super weak/faint. like,,,I can tell it’s there, but it can’t do much. I can’t even see it anymore or hear it out loud--it’s just like an inaudible voice, kinda like a thought that’s not actually coming from me. if that makes sense. probably doesn’t cause I’m just delusional apparently. oh well. can’t let my mom know I’m going through this cause we’d just argue. cant tell my sis cause she doesn’t wanna hear abt my kin bs. says its annoying cause I talk abt it too much. tho she also says it’s not an issue as long as I believe it and I’m not hurting anyone--and I’m not hurting people. not intentionally. I just wanna talk. have some sort of an outlet. but when most of my past life is full of war and murder and blood and stress and evil and destruction and everything else that is horrible, people are gonna judge me if I talk abt it. think I’m still some murderer today--which I’m not. definitely not. I regret the things I did. yet I’ve had someone tell me that ‘villains don’t feel regret’ and you wanna know what I did in response? pushed said person in a fit of anger. not a super strong push or anything, just enough to throw them off balance for a second. but like,,,you can’t tell me what I did or didn’t feel. sure I may not have regretted a whole bunch during the war, but afterwards? I was a walking ball of stress and regret trying to make a better name for myself but failing. waiting til the end of the planet, when I was the last living mobian, to do something abt it. and that something wasn’t pretty--it’s what caused me to move onto this current life. I get a lot of thoughts from various points in my last life, and those all cause a whole lot of emotions. yet, at the same time, I currently just feel like a void. an empty shell who feels the emotions but not the effects of them. the emotions exist but have no impact currently. tho that doesn’t make sense to you does it? wow. to think I was all happy yesterday over that follower milestone. ofc I have to go and ruin my own mood again since that’s all I’m good for apparently. might just go to bed early at this point. take the rest of the night off. nothing else to do. it’s either sleep or leave myself with my thoughts--the latter of which would only lead to more stress and/or empty feelings. anyway. I don’t want you guys worrying abt me. you can feel bad for me, try to make me feel better, but don’t worry. worrying abt me would be a waste of time. I’ll live. just going through another rough moment all of a sudden. but as long as I have a purpose in this current life, I plan to see it all the way through. meaning I won’t physically hurt myself or do anything stupid over this, so don’t worry. my physical health is just fine. mentally, not so sure. probably shouldn’t be saying not to worry cause now you’re gonna worry. whatever, I’ve been typing way too much. said more than I probably should have. probably look like an overreacting emo teen. but I’m just gonna go to bed and try not to let these thoughts get to me. tho my brain is most active right before falling asleep most nights so I doubt that’d work. gonna have to go to school tomorrow. no use in arguing, it makes everyone feel worse. it’s just gonna be a slow, crappy day. at least wednesday is a half day and then we get the rest of the week off for thanksgiving. not that we’re gonna be celebrating this year, we cancelled out plans cause my grandma’s sick and we usually go over to her place where she cooks thanksgiving dinner. but certain smells make her nauseous and the whole thing would be too much of a hassle, so we cancelled that this year. I’m kinda worried abt her. haven’t seen her in a little bit and she has another surgery in december. no idea what kind of surgery but she’s in her 70s and has been sick before so. idk. I do know I’m concerned for her and also myself. my own mental state is a wreck and idk what to do abt it. but for now I’m gonna go to bed. sorry for taking up so much of your time, assuming anyone actually read this whole thing.))

#Out of control {ooc}#News report {update}#This is an illusion {aesthetic}#The sharpest of blades {kin}#long post//#negative//#no talking in the tags this time #the post says it all #going to bed now. see you guys tomorrow afternoon/evening #or night. not sure #if I'm not online tomorrow I should be back wednesday #sometime in the afternoon probably #but idk. hard to tell with all this shit going on. too much to think abt.#but like I said don't worry abt me. I'll worry abt myself #you guys have fun doing whatever you usually do #don't pay attention to the edgy kinnie in the corner #who's trying not to let their thoughts get to them #go abt your own things. live your own lives #let me be alone for a bit. maybe sleep these emotions off.#maybe school will distract me tomorrow idk.#wow I said I wasn't gonna talk in the tags yet here I am #but hey. I'm apparently delusional and have no idea what I'm talking abt #despite knowing very well what I'm talking abt after experiencing the most kinnected shift I've ever experienced over the past 6-ish months #I know I'm not delusional but I let the comment get to me anyway.#it was over a year ago. before this shift even began. before I discovered myself.#yet here I am letting it hurt me.#just. h. need sleep now. for real this time.#might update you guys on my mood tomorrow or wednesday. we'll see.

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theliterateape · 3 years ago

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The Therapeutic Approach to Nationalism

by Don Hall

When it came to Chicago Thanksgivings, I could be a real cunt.

Sure, Jen and I would host Orphan's Gatherings—Thanksgiving for people stuck in Chicago and unable to travel to their family's homes over the holiday. I would drop a couple of hundred bucks and make a huge spread of food but the transaction for coming was to have to listen to me bitch about how shitty the holiday was.

"Enjoy the turkey. Afterward, I'll be providing each of you blankets covered in small pox and steal your property. I mean, I'm thankful for a lot but I'm mostly thankful I wasn't native to this country because, man, then I'd be fucked, amiright?"

This screed went all day long and became more and more incessant as I drank Scotch and beer and cooked. Depending on the year, it would spread out from the genocide of Native Americans to the American military industrial complex, the woeful state of our civil rights, and how evil the Republicans were.

"Here's some food and some vitriol as gravy. Happy Fucking Thanksgiving!"

What an asshole. It's hardly a surprise that most of those people in those early days don't bother to talk to me today.

I used to think that blunt honesty was always the best approach to all situations. It's, well, honest, and it's mildly therapeutic to simply air your truth to those around you. I used to believe that until I lived with Alice.

Alice was like me at Thanksgiving but every day of the year. Her inability to accept less than exactly how she wanted things was maddening. She was always brutally honest about her feelings (unless it was something she decided needed to be kept a secret and then it was as if she locked it away in a trunk she bought at a yard sale and hid under the stairs).

"I hate your hair." "This is a stupid Christmas gift." "I can't believe you're wearing that to dinner." "Wow. You're really getting fat." "Don't embarrass me by talking politics with my University friends, OK? You're practically right wing."

After a few years of this constant honesty, I found myself walking around like Eeyore, head down, eyes on the ground, feeling a sense of dread overcoming me with the now drilled-in idea that nothing I did could possibly be enough or correct. If Alice wasn't happy it was because I was inadequate. She now had someone to blame for her disappointments in life.

What I learned from Alice was that for blunt honesty to be effective and useful rather than merely a bludgeon of self importance leveled upon those who are willing to put up with it, it was about seeing how that honesty could be used by them.

If the criticism couldn't be utilized for the betterment of someone or something, it was just noisy, pointless bitching. Childish complaint and attempts to beat down those around into some aspect of submission. Looking for someone to blame as if the recipient's guilt and subsequent anguish could be healing in some way.

Common wisdom suggests that by thoroughly revisiting our traumatic experiences to understand why they happened and how to move past them is therapeutic. Unfortunately, like the movies in the 1980s subsidized by the Pentagon to help recruit kids with a Top Gun drumbeat of "How Cool is War, Right?," the therapy industry proliferates this constant vomiting of pain and search for who to blame for it is in contrast with new research.

"New research is showing that some people only get worse by continuing to brood and ruminate,” Stanford psychologist Mischel said. “Each time they recount the experience to themselves, their friends or their therapist, they only become more depressed."

SOURCE

It's quite possible that I have had uniquely bad therapy experiences. A few when I was younger felt pointless, the couple's therapy I went through with my first and second ex-wives felt disingenuous. While skewed for maximum satire, the talk therapy groups in Fight Club ring more true than anything else—sad, busted up people sitting in a circle complaining about how hard their life has been next to another room with another circle complaining about theirs next to another.

Talking about your problems to be heard seems fine but it also a cul de sac of constantly re-opening the wounds over and over without any sort of solution provided. Even if one discovers an abuser in their past to pin the blame upon, even if there is some sort of reckoning and accountability, neither talking about it or understanding your place in the grievance hierarchy manages to solve the inability to move past the trauma.

That's the goal, right? Move past it? It may not be an easy task but, at the end of the process, learning to get on with things, heal the pain, live with the scars is the goal, yes?

It is the same when it comes to big picture items as well.

As someone decidedly Left in political views, I can't say I've ever been in a huge Bitch Session of Truthtelling with anyone right wing. Not my monkey, not my circus. On the hand, I can't count the number of Leftist circle jerks I've been mired in, often contributing more than my fair share of discourse and blockading to the mix. It is the Choir Preaching to the Choir so that One Solidifies Membership in the Freaking Choir.

So many of these sessions amount to telling the truth and identifying who is to blame for that truth.

"There is no reason for the evil that is represented by the Billionaire Class. How much money does anyone need? And at the expense of everyone else? The System is rigged by the wealthy, for the wealthy."

"The systemic racism in the country's policing stems from its racist beginnings and that's why so many black men are indiscriminately killed by cops. How many videos do we have to endure before things change?"

"Fossil fuels are the source of climate disaster. Everyone can see that. If we don't change course, the planet is going to be destroyed in our lifetime!"

All true, I'd think. But I heard that last week and the week before and the week before that. Sort of like my Thanksgiving rants.

Who’s to blame? The rich. The police. Big Oil. Where are the solutions to the problems?

Playing the blame game never works. A deep set of research shows that people who blame others for their mistakes lose status, learn less, and perform worse relative to those who own up to their mistakes. Research also shows that the same applies for organizations. Groups and organizations with a rampant culture of blame have a serious disadvantage when it comes to creativity, learning, innovation, and productive risk-taking.

Harvard Business Review

Blame, beyond personal accountability, is likewise pointless without a plan and “Hold Those to Blame Accountable!” isn’t a great plan.

Truth without pragmatic action is meaningless.

And so … the birthday of the nation comes up. The therapeutic gripe sessions begin. Instead of celebrating the country’s progress, the ideals it is founded upon, any sense of national pride, we have a host of Thanksgiving Don Hall’s pissing and moaning about the missteps and outright horrors committed by those long dead.

There is a lot of blunt trauma truth tossed out just before, during, and after our national day. Things like the fact of indoctrinated worship of the Founders without some serious views upon their flaws as human beings. Like the intentional absence in our collective history of the contributions made by those not in the majority. As I would've said on a typical Thanksgiving, an absence of any genuine reflection on the near genocide of the natives.

Not so much the next step of how to fix the issues or even the simple truth that most of the problems in the past cannot be fixed rather the recurrent results modified for a more just and equitable nation. Lotsa bitching. Not lotsa solution building. Tons of blame. Ounces of creative problem solving.

A whole bunch of Thanksgiving Cunts holding court and demanding that if you want to shoot of fireworks, wave the flag, eat some grilled meat, and get a bit drunk in celebration of the enduring experiment in democracy and multi-culturalism America strives to be, you are forced to listen to them piss all over the parade.

The thing about Alice was that for all of her brutal honesty, none of it made me want to change my hair, I stopped buying her gifts altogether, I intentionally wore things and said things that would embarrass her and the only reason I lost weight was because the gym was a place I could escape her for a few hours. Her mean spirited honesty accomplished the exact opposite of what she was aiming for.

The United States ain't so united and maybe it never has been but wallowing in the painful trauma of the past only has value if the next step is to focus on what we can do together to avoid the mistakes made by our elders. That's the entire point of America in the first place.

So, Happy Birthday, America. Let's keep trying to improve.

#July 4

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merzelifestyle · 4 years ago

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Casual Organic Modern Fall Table

There are a few things that will be different this year when entertaining throughout the holidays. With social distancing on most of our minds, hosting parties will be limited to smaller intimate gatherings. There is also a huge surge in using organically crafted products from your surrounding areas allowing for more earth tones to be present in the home.

Our holidays will be no different. I generally have a huge house full of guests when it comes to celebrating Thanksgiving and Christmas but this year we will only dine with my immediate family. Honestly, that poses a huge challenge for me. I love the hustle and bustle of the holidays! Instead of chaffing dishes and large open house buffet’s, I will set a table for four and concentrating my efforts instead on cooking a complex gourmet meal that I generally will not attempt with a full house.

My daughter will be visiting through the holidays and for us that is special. She has always loved to cook, and it would be fun to cook together as we did when she was just a young girl. I’m thinking my meal will consist of an Authentic French Onion Soup by Epicurious, Classic French Duck A L ’Orange,

a small turkey with all the fixings, homemade rolls, and a dessert.

When setting my holiday table, I wanted to put together a design that would be modern with warmth to it. I absolutely love the look and feel of a table that has beautifully crafted organic pieces that brings the outdoors into my house and mix them with lovely modern and vintage decor.

More and more these days, I find myself wanting to capture the feel of the outdoors and bring it into my home. I love organically crafted pieces that come from the surrounding areas here in New England where I live. Fresh earth tone linens, hand turned wooden bowls and lovely whimsical vases paired with my love for beautiful crystal and French decor creates a warm and inviting tablescape.

The pieces I am using come from professional artisans that I know personally and professionally who take pride in thier craftmanship. I love that these items were made from their own hands and are organically crafted from local resources. In today’s environment, it means more to me than ever to have a calm and restful home atmosphere.

First, what is Organic Modern Design Aesthetics?

Organic Modern Design is being kicked around a lot these days and I wanted to put some definition around it for those who are confused about the term. This trend refers to an overarching design style — a balanced mix of modern lines and often crisp white surfaces contrasted with natural forms and materials, and neutral colors. The design is seen as biophilic in nature and has an overall comforting look and feel to it.

For this year, instead of dining super formal for the upcoming holidays as I most often do, I wanted to create a more soothing and comfortable dining experience. It will be just the four of us and with the climate as it is these days, I thought comfort is what is needed most.

I want to use my dining room for my meals through the holidays. Since my table holds 8 people comfortably, I will need to get creative with my design to use up all the space. I have some tricks that I often use and will share them with you.

The other thing that my family will do this years is have a ZOOM call with my extended family who can’t be with us. Right before we have dinner, we will sit at our table and share a glass of wine while on our call. It is our way of connecting with those we love. We can still laugh and share stories but it will be remote.

""Let us celebrate the occasion with wine and sweet words." " -- Plautus

On to my table design

I have created my modern organic table design using white crisp linens, natural forms and materials, and neutral colors.

What I love about these linen napkins is that they have an open weave with a special yarn detail and herringbone stripe. The texture of the fabric is beautiful. Although they appear to be super dainty they are not. They are a durable sustainable linen fabric that I have used over and over again. The neutral hues of the napkins add to my overall organic feel.

These lovely wooden salad bowls are a black walnut with rich grains thourghout each piece. The natural wood material and earthy tones anchors the placesettings making each a focal point within themselves. You have lovely contrasting textures and colors in each layer of your place setting starting first with the charger, then the plate, the napkin and then finally the wooden salad bowl.

This live edge serve bowl is a perfect addition to my tablescape and will hold my hot homemade biscuits wonderfully. The linen is the same fabric as my other napkins shown elsewhere with just a few differences. This one has a black yarn detail in several areas of the napkin. I used this napkin design because I wanted to bring to the forefront some of the different colors in my bowl. Walnut has so many beautiful grains in it and one color that I love to accent is the black. Because these bowls are handmade, they are not perfect nor replicated like you would see in a manufactured piece. They are created out of upcycled wood from the forests in Vermont. They have smooth rounded free formed edges that you often will see in biophilic and current modern design.

My tablecloth is a simple off-white linen that is slightly wrinkled. In formal dining, I will use very crisp well ironed linens, but here it is different. The casual natural occurring wrinkles add to the organic feel to the table. A few wrinkles are fine. Too many wrinkles will take away from the design because your eye will just settle on the tablecloth and it can appear messier than anything.

I wrote a blog all about linens and how to care for them if you would like to learn more. Click on this link to read Oh Those DAUNTING Linens.

Color and presentation are still especially important when setting a table. With an organic modern styled table, florals can really make a difference in the attraction of your design. I wanted a few subtle pops of fall colors that weren’t overwhelming but still have some resemblance of an Autumn day.

I chose a charming pattern from Juliska in the crystal, chargers, plates and pitcher. They are a more contemporary style that I find to be both modern and still have a French feel to them. They add a softness to my table which I always look for.

"flowers always make people better, happier, and more helpful; they are sunshine, food and medicine to the mind." -- Luther Burbank

HINT: When I am setting a table that is larger than I need I will often take my larger centerpiece and place it at the other end of the table where we aren’t dining. I like to bring my place setting together at one side of the table using the other for food and florals. I purposefully do this because I want to fill that area of the table that I will not be using and at the same time create a more intimate dining experience in the area where we will be eating. It’s a great way to allow for you to hold your serving dishes. I often will have a small chaffing dish on the opposite side of the table to take up space.

In this design, I will put my live edge wooden serve bowl with rolls in the empty area of the table along with some votives, a wine decanter, and other food items that I want to add to the table. The one thing that I do insist on is having a lovely floral arrangement on the opposite side of the table where we will not be dining. It just adds to the interest of the table, takes up space and creates a beautiful view.

When we are done with dinner, I will remove the dinner items or chaffing dishes and then bring the desserts with tea and coffee to the table. Once that is done, everyone can sit and enjoy the rest of the meal.

Just because we are social distancing this year doesn’t mean we can’t enjoy a lovely dinner with family. It can be as formal or casual as you like. What is most important is that you have each other.

As with everything I post on my blogs, please feel free to comment or if you have any questions, please email me through my contact page. I welcome it anytime!

Design with your heart™️

Happy entertaining my friends!

Mary

"May your home be a place where friends meet, family gathers, and love grows. " -- Anonymous

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quaintrelle-on-the-loose · 7 years ago

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Two more days before this year ends but I am already here wrapping things up for this year. I wanted to do this now so that I could already start preparing for the new year. So that I could already start doing my blog posts for my new blog. I badly wanted this year to end already and to finally let go of all the setbacks, pains, and disappointments that I felt the entire year. I am so excited of having a new beginning. I needed a new starting point where I could start living my life with the same optimism that I had months before I let my sadness, fears and anxieties rule my life.

Twenty-seventeen has been a roller coaster ride for me. The first half of it, it felt like I was riding a roller coaster that only goes up because of the unending blessings and continuous victorious moments that I had: I had the opportunity to be elected as a member of the two prestigious international honor societies (Pi Gamma Mu and Phi Kappa Phi). I could still remember how happy I was the both times (one of which was sent to me on the night of my birthday!) when I received a mail from these organizations telling me that I was chosen and nominated to be part of their orgs. Aside from these, my year’s highlight was that day when I graduated from college with Latin honors. That day was priceless! I wouldn’t trade it for anything in this world. Seeing how happy and proud my family and my parents were made me proud of myself, too after years. Finally wearing that Sablay after four years of hard work is going to be one of the proudest moments of my life, forever.

Apart from these highlights, what made this year happier was of course, the presence of family and friends. Every celebration spent with the family has been a blast, mum’s surprise 50th birthday celebration included, even if Tristan, my little brother, got into a motor accident the night of our mum’s birthday. That was one of the scariest nights of my life. I don’t know where did I get the courage to go to the hospital with my aunt since my mum can’t because she was so nervous and she cannot handle situations like that one, and Papa didn’t have an idea (lasted for at most one hour I guess) since my mum didn’t let him know because he’s gonna be too mad for sure considering that my brother just sneaked out. That night, I tried to be brave while I stayed beside my brother at the hospital, telling him that everything’s gonna be okay and that he shouldn’t worry about getting “punched” by Papa ‘cause I got his back. You see, I have a love-hate relationship with my brother. But that night, I couldn’t feel anything else for him but love. And i was too scared to be honest. I was scared because I didn’t want to lose another baby brother. Again. And I told myself that night to be brave for him because I could see how nervous and scared he was, too. He was chilling that I had to hold him to calm him. It was hard watching my brother like that but I had to be tough. Once we got home though, I cried. I couldn’t stop crying. I cried in front of my sibs. And I found it hard to sleep. That night too was when realization hit me and I have made myself believe that I couldn’t take up law as well. I am too weak for that.

And speaking of family, this year was also the first time that I didn’t celebrate my birthday with my family. This got me sad for days before my birthday actually since I cannot ditch my majors to go home here in Pangasinan instead. But I saw Papa’s effort of cheering me up days prior my day and my sister also went to Baguio to celebrate with me. I also got early morning birthday greetings from the family. Papa even cooked some of his recipes and made my sister bring them to me. I was happy that day too because I had my friends to celebrate with me. It went well and I was just so grateful.

The gift of friendship is one of the things that I feel so thankful for every year. And this year, nothing has changed. I am still grateful that I have the friends that I have today. Those food trips, window shoppings, search for the right lipstick shades, sleepovers, and late movie date nights with the squad in Baguio and the sudden craving for Smirnoff and bagnet at Session Road during Panagbenga’s Session in Bloom (blame I’m Drunk I Love You for this lol) is one of the funniest and craziest things that I have done with the squad. The entire four years with my college squad were a blast!

I also feel grateful that I have my childhood friends, my grade school friends, still supporting me and being here with me until now. Their graduation messages made my Graduation Day perfect. Being part of my support system for ages, they also deserved the Thanksgiving celebration that we had this year after my Graduation. I have so much love for this bunch!

And of course, 2017 is also for the new friendships that I have built with online “strangers”-turned-friends (shoutout to you too, Tumblr friends! :) ). To all of you guys, thank you for sharing your life stories with me and for trusting me. Thank you for listening to me and to my dramas in life, too. Thank you for sharing my lows with me and for boosting my confidence. You don’t know how much it means to me that I had you to talk to. I hope that you’d also try living a more positive life that is full of hope and SELF LOVE in the coming year.

And to Ran and Aaron, thank you. So much.

Six busy months and six “idle” months. The remaining half of the year hasn’t really been that great for me. Alongside with the milestone and achievements are the expectations and pressure that I received from other people, including my family’s. I let the expectations and pressure eat me that’s why my frustrations and sadness have ruled my life for months. I got so stressed and frustrated that it seemed like the world still continued on moving while I got lost and just watched it to revolve in front of me. It felt like for months, I just waited for each day to pass by and I just continued living life monotonously. I didn’t know what to do and where to go next. I got lost because I listened too much to other people’s expectations and I got scared of failing and disappointing them. I turned voiceless and hasn’t been brave enough of voicing out and standing up for what I want.

Self-reflecting a week ago made me realize a lot of things including the realization that it wasn’t the first time that I’ve been like this. Yes, not this down and not this worse, but I know that I’ve already been in this same place before. I realized that in every major turning point in my life, it always turned out that I’d found myself feeling so down and lost. And hurt. And it was just through time that it became clear to me why those things had to happen in the past.

“Everything happens for a reason,” that’s what they say and I believe that. Things happen because they have to happen. Maybe to teach us some lessons or just to show us that we have to take a break, pause, breathe, and set our priorities straight. Yes, I consider these past six months as a major setback. But looking at things, I still wanna think and believe that I had this very long break for a reason. Maybe ate Pia was right. Maybe God was just letting me rest since the real world is going to be a more competitive place. I would need all the courage and strength that I could get. Or maybe the long break had to happen because knowing myself, once I go out there, I know that I am going to be a workaholic. Or as what I have realized, this long break is God’s way of telling me to take a break and set my priorities straight. He didn’t want me to go and dwell out there unprepared and unsure. He wanted to prepare me. And He used these six months to bring me back to Him.

Even if I keep on saying that I have been so idle and unproductive these past six months because I didn’t have a “specific” role that I had to “fulfill,” I still want to leave and turn my back on this year remembering the positive things that happened in my life. I am choosing to look at the brighter side of things. That’s who I am anyways — the girl who is full of optimism in life. There are still a lot of good things that happened before this year ends, anyways: my 2017′s plot twist (the reconciliation of a family conflict that lasted for more than 10 years), and of course, backtracking a bit and reminding myself of who I was, am, and who I wanna be. I will leave 2017 remembering what one of my favorite college professors told me before, “Fam’s expectations are but normal. But don’t live in the shadow of these expectations. You can do more than these pressuring forces from your fam. I believe in you. You should believe in yourself as much as I do. Kaya mo yan. Make your fam even prouder and let them be amazed by your brilliance :)” And I would definitely welcome 2018 with the mantra, “Be who you are, not who the world wants you to be” because that’s how things should be. At the end of the day, what would matter most anyways is how I lived my life. I don’t wanna regret not fighting for what I want and for who I am.

But above anything else, the best thing that happened when I felt like I was at my lowest point was that I found myself back where I came from — from Him. Someday, I’d definitely see why all these had to happen this year. Someday, it’s all gonna make sense. But for now, “Au revoir 2017!”

#2017 #Wrap Up #Au Revoir 2017

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atlantatorchnews · 4 years ago

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“With Talent On Loan from God…” — A Thanksgiving Celebration (Worldwide Evangelistic Outreach)

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Click here to listen in 100 languages. On this Thanksgiving, I thank God for the talents and gifts that He has bestowed upon my family and me and that is no doubt the reason why I love to see people do what they are truly talented and gifted by God to do. It is a blessing to see singers, musicians, actors, actresses, athletes in all sports, writers, speakers, business people, doctors, cooks, auto mechanics, lawyers, and leaders of all types seemingly without effort and almost flawlessly doing what they were given by God the talents and the gifts to do. Their talents (or gifts) come from God, and He has blessed the world with an abundance of and an array of talents. Every time we see these talents on display, we ought to be thankful to God for them and for the way in which many people use them to benefit and bless society. Many years ago, I heard a popular secular radio talk show host begin his radio broadcasts with the phrase ‘with talent on loan from God…' Even though I have not listened to him in years, that phrase stuck with me. It was good for him to know that whatever talents and gifts he has they came from God, and it is good for all of us to know that, and we all should give God thanks. God is the source of each of the gifts and talents that people have received. First Peter 4:10-11 says, "As every man hath received the gift, even so minister the same one to another, as good stewards of the manifold grace of God. If any man speak, let him speak as the oracles of God; if any man minister, let him do it as of the ability which God giveth: that God in all things may be glorified through Jesus Christ, to whom be praise and dominion for ever and ever." These verses tell us that every person has received talents from God and that it is their responsibility to use those talents for the good of others. Every time someone uses the talents God has given them, they bring glory to their Creator, and we should offer thanksgiving to God for the talents that He gives to us to use for His glory, praise, and honor. Many people do not hesitate to honor God as the source of their great talent, and they seek to honor and glorify God by the use of their talents. Many have also spoken of their faith in God and in Jesus Christ as the foundation of their success in life. Listen to these words from some people whom you might recognize. Oscar-award winning actor, Matthew McConaughey, said, "First off I want to thank God, because that’s who I look up to. He’s graced my life with opportunities that I know are not of my hand or any other human hand. He has shown me that it’s a scientific fact that gratitude reciprocates. In the words of the late (British actor) Charlie Laughton, who said, ‘When you got God you got a friend…’” Super-bowl winning quarterback of the Seattle Seahawks, Russell Wilson, "First of all, God is so good. He brought me here a mighty long way. My dad used to always tell me, ‘Russ, why not you?’ And what that meant was believe in yourself, believe in the talent God has given you even though you are 5 foot 11, and you can go a long way." NBA star, Kevin Durant, said, "When I'm talking in front of people or when people tell me I'm great, I remind myself that I can always be better. I've just got to be thankful to the Lord for the gifts He's given me. My gift back to Him is to always be humble and to work as hard as I can." Peyton Manning, a Super Bowl-winning quarterback, said, "At age 13, I committed my life to Christ, and that faith has been most important to me ever since... My faith doesn’t make me perfect, it makes me forgiven, and provides me the assurance I once looked for. I’ve been blessed [to] have so little go wrong in my life, and [have been] given so much." Political analyst and columnist, Kirsten Powers, said, “I don't really feel like I had any courage when I became a Christian, I just gave in. I wasn't courageous; I didn't have any choice. I kept trying to not believe but I just couldn't avoid [accepting Christ]. If I could have avoided it, I would have. There is nothing convenient about it in my life or in the world I live in. It's not like living in the South where everybody is a Christian. I live in a world where nobody is a believer. But God pursued me.” Olympic gold medalist, Allyson Felix, said, "My faith is the reason I run – it calms my heart and makes everything feel like a lift. My speed is definitely a gift from [God], and I run for His glory. " Truett Cathy, the late, great businessman and founder of Chick-fil-A, said, the main purpose of his business is "to glorify God by being a faithful steward of all that is entrusted to us; and, to have a positive influence on all who come in contact with Chick-fil-A." Odell Beckham, Jr., of the New York Giants, who recently made what many are calling the greatest catch in NFL history, is also a believer. On the night of the now famous catch, he gave God the glory by saying, “God gave me this talent.” The day after making his amazing catch, he said, "I wanna thank God for everything he's doing in my life." He also said, "God is good. That's an understatement. He's always on time, maybe not when you want him to be but always when the time is right! God puts people and obstacles in our lives not for us to fail, but to bless us in mysterious ways that our own understanding can't imagine... If you don't know God, my advice? Get to know him! And If you do know God, get closer to Him!" Madison Bumgarner, the pitcher for the World Series-winning San Francisco Giants, said, “If it weren't for my faith, there is no way I would be where I am at today. My faith is a really big part of my career and my life... The biggest thing I want people to know about me is that I am a believer, I'm a Christian, not just that I'm a baseball player or any of the other stuff I like to do... Jesus Christ means everything to me. He is my Saviour and I live for Him. I don't want to live for myself; I want to live for Him.” Actress and author, Candace Cameron Bure, said, “God has changed me in ways that words can't describe. He has transformed the way I think and live my life. Things that were once important to me are no longer. I can't help but share the Good News with everyone! I know there is nothing more important. I know that without Christ, the eternal consequences are devastating. I urge you to surrender your whole life to Jesus, turn from your sin and trust in Him with all your heart.” Denzel Washington said, "I believe that Jesus is the Son of God. I've been filled with the Holy Spirit. I know it's real... I've always understood why I've been blessed to be put in this situation [acting and directing]. And I'm more than happy to take advantage of it and to preach, if you will, about what God has done in my life." American musician, Sheila E., said, "[After a period of difficulty in my life] I decided, 'You know what, Lord? If you just give me another chance, I'll do whatever you want me to do.' I got the Bible and I started reading and I kept it on my chest. I slept with it and never took it out of my hand for weeks." Bobby Bowden, the second-winningest coach in college football, said, "If you love [God] and serve Him and try to be loyal to Him and obedient to Him, He's not going to let you fail. That's the thing that has happened to me." Albert Pujols (Pu-holz) of the St. Louis Cardinals said, "My life's goal is to bring glory to Jesus. My life is not mostly dedicated to the Lord, it is 100% committed to Jesus Christ and His will. God has given me the ability to succeed in the game of baseball. But baseball is not the end; baseball is the means by which my wife and I glorify God. Baseball is simply my platform to elevate Jesus Christ, my Lord and Savior." Country singing star, Carrie Underwood said, “I grew up going to church camp and reading my Bible and having different faith books and movies in my life...My songs are sometimes focused on God, Jesus and faith, and that is a part of my "Bible Beltness," where such themes are popular. I was not the first, nor will I be the last, to sing about God.” Tim Howard, the U.S. soccer goalkeeper, who also has Tourette's syndrome said, "Living with Tourette's is not easy. But God has blessed me with the gift of athleticism as well. He has done some powerful things in my life through the combination of these two gifts. He also has shown me ways to use my position as a professional athlete to encourage others with Tourette's syndrome. Today, I am blessed to be living a dream. And yet, if it all went away tomorrow, I know I would still have peace. That probably sounds crazy to most people, but that's the kind of peace Christ gives. It is rooted in His love, and it surpasses all understanding. You can experience this same sense of love and peace, too. All you have to do is ask for it." Award-winning actor and director, Blair Underwood, said, “I am a Christian. I believe God has a plan. I believe he is not going to leave us hanging. As a man, in our society, I don't have all the answers. Being able to turn matters over to a higher power works for me.” Super Bowl-winning coach Tony Dungy said, “You are never going to get anywhere in sports or in life until you become convinced of the truth of the gospel of Jesus Christ. You may become a professional athlete or have fame and nice cars and nice houses and a lot of money, but what you’ll find is that all of that stuff goes away pretty quickly. You have to understand that Christ died for our sins, and that He died not just to be our Savior but so that He could be the center of our lives.” Michelle Williams, one third of the popular group, Destiny's Child, said, "[Despite some criticism that I have received for doing both secular and Gospel music,] I believe that I am doing my part to be a witness for Jesus Christ. Some people will do gospel when their career fails, but I chose to do it at the height of the popularity of Destiny's Child. And I didn't want to do it because it was a fad. I wanted to do it because it's in me. It's in my heart. God places people in different parts (areas) for different reasons. We know Jesus is coming back soon and I am doing my part to make sure that people know about him as well.” Famed neurosurgeon, Ben Carson, said, "If your priority is to look good in front of people, your life will take a different direction than if your priority is to use the talents that God has given you to make a positive difference in the world. I believe God has a specific purpose for me – and for every other person to whom he gives the gift of life. If there is a God and you believe in him, you know the best is yet to come. I always pray before any operation. I think God helps me know what to do....We'll always be safe in Jesus Christ if we place our faith in the Lord. Oprah Winfrey said, "I am a Christian. That is my faith. I'm not asking you to be a Christian. If you want to be one I can show you how. But it is not required. I have respect for all faiths... My favorite Bible verse, because I am a Christian, is Acts 17:28. It says, 'In God I live, and move, and have my being.' And you want to know why I'm so successful? Because I knew that at four-years-old, I wouldn't be who I am today without that." I could go on with the testimonies of many other people who have become successful through the use of their God-given gifts and talents. But, as we close this celebration of the talents that God has given, I want to let you know that you, too, have talents from God, and you can be a success through the talents that He has given you. Pastor Rick Warren said, "Whether you are a musician or an accountant, a teacher or a cook, God gave you those abilities to serve others. You are a manager of the gifts God has given to you. They may be great or small in your eyes, but they matter to God. When God made you, He made an investment in you, and He expects a return on that investment.” I tell people all the time, God did not put you here to do nothing. God wants you to use the talents and gifts He has given you for His glory and for the benefit of others. And when He uses you, you ought to give God thanks. The main way you can begin to give God a return on His investment in you is to give your heart and life to Him today. You see, not only, did God invest in you by giving you unique talents and abilities, but He made a major investment in You when He sacrificed His only Son, Jesus Christ, on the cross so that you would not have to suffer eternal punishment for your sins. Allow me to explain: No matter how talented and gifted you are, and no matter how much you may have accomplished in life, you are still a sinner just like everyone else, and if you do not accept God’s gift of salvation through Jesus Christ, then you will spend eternity in hell. Allow me to show you how you can accept Jesus Christ as your Saviour today. 1. Accept the fact that you are a sinner, and that you have broken God's law. The Bible says in Ecclesiastes 7:20: "For there is not a just man upon earth that doeth good, and sinneth not." Romans 3:23 reads: "For all have sinned and come short of the glory of God." In fact, I am the chief of sinners, so don't think that you're alone. 2. Accept the fact that there is a penalty for sin. The Bible states in Romans 6:23: "For the wages of sin is death…" 3. Accept the fact that you are on the road to hell. Jesus Christ said in Matthew 10:28: "And fear not them which kill the body, but are not able to kill the soul: but rather fear him which is able to destroy both soul and body in hell." The Bible says in Revelation 21:8: "But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death." 4. Accept the fact that you cannot do anything to save yourself! The Bible states in Ephesians 2: 8, 9: "For by grace are ye saved through faith: and that not of yourselves: it is a gift of God. Not of works, lest any man should boast." 5. Accept the fact that God loves you more than you love yourself, and that He wants to save you from hell. Jesus Christ said in John 3:16, "For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life." 6. With these facts in mind, please repent of your sins, believe on the Lord Jesus Christ and pray and ask Him to come into your heart and save you this very moment. The Bible states in the book of Romans 10:9, 13: "That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised Him from the dead, thou shalt be saved." "For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved." Dear friend, if you are willing to believe on the Lord Jesus Christ for salvation, please pray with me this simple prayer: Heavenly Father, I realize that I am a sinner and that I have done some bad things in my life. For Jesus Christ sake, please forgive me of my sins. I now believe with all of my heart that Jesus Christ died for me, was buried, and rose again. Lord Jesus, please come into my heart and save my soul and change my life today. Amen. If you believed in your heart that Jesus Christ died on the cross, was buried, and rose again, allow me to say, congratulations on doing the most important thing in life and that is accepting Jesus Christ as your Lord and Saviour! For more information to help you grow in your newfound faith in Christ, go to Gospel Light Society.com and read "What To Do After You Enter Through the Door". Jesus Christ said in John 10:9, "I am the door: by me if any man enter in, he shall be saved, and shall go in and out, and find pasture." God loves you! We love you! May God bless you! And Happy Thanksgiving!

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idonotknowhowtoo-blog · 6 years ago

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How To Prevent A Long Hauliday

People can dread the holiday for a variety of both simple and complex reasons. If it's loss. You may have had losses or trials in your life that overwhelm any attempts to commemorate; you keep in mind previous holiday with tears in your eyes. You're uncertain how you

're going to get to January and simply wish you could sleep til then. If

it's perfectionism ... You might put numerous excessively high demands on yourself, purchasing gifts, cooking elegant food, embellishing your home so that it's completely Pinterest-worthy. The pressure you place on yourself is immense. You have a million details on your mind. Aunt Molly is now gluten-free and eating Keto. Kid Joey, an animal rights advocate and fairly new vegan, won't touch the duck, the turkey or the sausage-laced stuffing. And Uncle Simon will get a little tipsy if dinner isn't served on time. You take it on yourself to make certain all are happy.

If it's family conflict ...

You could have strained relationships with your family, so the thought of seeing them might vary anywhere from difficult to irritating to uncomfortable. You're currently tired, answering the regular concerns-- "Are you getting together with family this year?" You might have stated you 'd go however the fear you have is palpable. Or you may be estranged from family which can bring relief or sadness, or both.

If it's depression and tension ...

There may be things going on in your life or your kids's that you 'd choose not to discuss or have individuals figure out. Even if those individuals love you and imply well, often you can be having a hard time with such pity or despair that it's hard to be vulnerable. You're not in a proud or protected emotional area, and you might feel as if all you wish to do is conceal. You may be experiencing another episode of anxiety or wave of panic. You may simply have been diagnosed with bipolar illness and be experimenting with a new medication.

If it's Seasonal Affective Disorder ...

To toss more fuel on the fire, numerous people, as the sun decreases faster and cold dismal weather condition comes our method, experience Seasonal depression. SAD is generally a mild or moderate despondency throughout the colder months that can be difficult to deal with.

If Your Vacation Appears More Like a "Hauliday"...

Here are some ideas to help.

Accept who you are and where you remain in life.

Accept your weak points, your household scenario, and where you are mentally. If you don't cook a lot, then your meal might not all come out at the very same time. No issue. Rolls make an excellent dessert and easy tastes just as great as made complex.

Offer yourself the present of taking a smaller role in any celebrations you might seem like participating in. Honor grief by going to a "Blue Christmas" church service, or whatever your particular faith might provide. Plan a personal routine of some kind to recognize how you are feeling. You might believe avoidance will help. However what is probably more valuable is honoring your sorrow while also staying as connected with those who like you as you can.

Delegate tasks to lighten your own load and keep your visitors inhabited.

If you are fretted that people may not get along or if you're stressed out about that many individuals remaining in your house, keeping people hectic assists keep order in your home. Ask your sis to baste the turkey and make the gravy, have Uncle Jack take the kids to the community park, demand for volunteers to set the table or established the buffet.

I always needed to pass out napkins at my grandmother's, a task that I felt demeaned my real talents. It most likely kept me out of the kitchen and my grandmother's hair, as I had to count them, fold them, and so on

. Recite a mantra every day. Remind yourself of what's most essential to you.

"It's only three hours. I can get through 3 hours."

"I will get done today all that I am expected to."

"He would desire me to enjoy what he liked a lot. It's all right if I cry."

Keep this as you go through your days as a tip that what you're experiencing is momentary, and that you can survive it. Since you will.

Plan ahead of time how you will address an unwanted question.

Consider the interaction variation of a bait and switch method; you nibble the bait, however then change your answer to finest serve your own convenience zone. You respond to without actually answering.

"Thanks so much for inquiring about Jenny-- I'll let her understand you did."

"It's sort of you to inquire about my task search, however today I 'd love to simply to concentrate on this yummy food!"

"I in fact do not miss out on being with my family on this holiday; I much prefer to be with the household I have actually built with my pals."

"I have actually had better times, but I'm here to enjoy myself today."

Do not feel obligated to provide requested information; even if you know they're asking out of authentic issue and not gossipy interest. You're enabled to retain whatever privacy makes you comfortable.

Bear In Mind That Contrast Robs You of Happiness.

Recognize that some people will put on a terrific show and everything will appear perfect. "Seem" is the important word there, since no one's life is best. Some folks need for others to believe it is, which could reflect that the reverse is really the truth.

I hope your Thanksgiving will not be the start of a long haul, however a day where you can breathe. Eat great food. Enjoy what you are able and be grateful for the important things that you can.

May you have a significant and satisfying Thanksgiving.

You can now listen to Dr. Margaret as she speaks about Completely Covert Depression and numerous other subjects on her brand-new podcast, SelfWork with Dr. Margaret Rutherford. Click here! You can also subscribe to her site, and sign up with the over 4000 readers who enjoy getting her weekly posts via e-mail! For signing up with, you'll get a complimentary copy of her ebook, "Seven Commandments of Excellent Treatment," a guide to assessing a therapist.

This was originallyreleased on November 22, 2015 and was upgraded on November 17, 2018.

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evanscottblog · 6 years ago

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Reflections from two years on the road

Today marks my final day traveling on the road for the Leadership Development Program at Chick-fil-A. For the past 24 months, I’ve lived out of a suitcase and waffle fry boxes shipped across the country. This has been the most difficult and rewarding time for Lauren and I, and I want to take a moment today to reflect on what we’ve been through and learned.

The Risks

Lauren and I are not naturally risk takers. We are creatures of habit, and were perfectly happy waking up every day in our apartment in Denver with our view of the mountains and ending every day cooking a meal together or just snacking on popcorn and cheese (a surprisingly perfect combination). We were new to our careers, mine in corporate training and hers in elementary education. After two years working in the fields we went to school for, we started to think a lot about what we wanted to do with the rest of our lives. We were so blessed to have found work after graduation but we both struggled to find our purpose in that work. So we started to explore our options.

Lauren was never happier than after a good workout at Pure Barre with her community of supportive women around her. I never enjoyed a day of work more than I did in high school and college working in the friendly and fast-paced environment at Chick-fi-A. So we did what any logical millennial with student loan debt would do, give up our salaries to go work at a gym and a fast food restaurant.

There was no certainty where this would lead us. Our hope was that I could one day own a Chick-fil-A back near our family in Indiana, but that was a crazy dream to even say out loud. The selection rate for Chick-fil-A operators is lower than Harvard’s acceptance rate. After doing some research, I discovered the Leadership Development program (LDP) was the best way for a young person with little real business experience to prove themselves worthy of running a multi-million dollar restaurant. The only issue was that it required two years of full-time travel, and the Program itself was incredibly difficult to get into.

So we took a leap of faith. We prayed and planned like crazy. I spent a year as the operations director of a Chick-fil-A in Denver hoping to learn as much as I could about the business and stand out enough to make it into the program. Luckily, it worked. But then reality sank in.

I had to travel for two years to random cities for undefined durations with only a week or two notice of my next assignment. Lauren was thriving as the manager of a Pure Barre studio and planning beautiful Colorado weddings. We knew that LDP was the right decision for us, but also knew that Lauren giving up her passions to hang out in a hotel in a strange city all day was not an option worth pursuing. We decided she would stay in Denver, for now.

We committed to each other. We committed to talking as much as possible, traveling to see each other every 3-6 weeks, and being patient through long days and stressful times where it felt like two years would never end. We spent a good portion of our dating and engaged life in a long-distance relationship, so we knew we could handle the challenges of distance, or at least as well as anyone could. That said, the day I had to leave Denver to start Day 1 at CFA was one of the hardest days of my life. It was gray and overcast and Lauren had fallen asleep with her head on my lap as we sat in the still silence of our apartment together for the last time. She drove me to the airport and we gave a long tearful goodbye. We’ve (read: she) probably set a record for most tears shed at airport drop-off lanes in the last 24 months.

The Lessons

You may have seen our updates over the past two years, but here’s a list of the cities we’ve gotten to work and visit thanks to the corporate chicken shack: Houston, Salt Lake City, Laredo, San Antonio, Austin, Hattiesburg, Pensacola, New Orleans, Chicago, Baltimore, New York City, Terre Haute, and Cincinnati. Staying in hotels for work every night has it’s perks, and earned us enough points to celebrate our five year anniversary in Hawaii this year, too.

I can’t possibly cover all the things I’ve learned in the last two years, but here are the highlights.

People make the place. Not every city has been glamorous, but after a few months, they’ve all been so hard to leave. I’ve worked with hundreds of Chick-fil-A team members in the last two years and am so thankful they let me into their town, work, and lives. Politics, religion, race, and gender just don’t matter when you’re elbow deep in peanut oil and covered in raw chicken juice together talking about life.

Some days are just going to suck. We can’t win ‘em all. Whether you’re running out of chicken, breaking an ankle while working an 18 hour day, or not being able to answer your spouse’s phone call for the fourth time, some days are just stacked against you. When you recognize those days up front and say “bring it on”, you can learn from those challenges and hardships. Faith in God and His plan are extremely helpful in that.

Stay true to yourself. My worst moments in the past two years were when I tried to pretend to be something I’m not or present an image of someone who’s got it figured out. People see through it. You have to be vulnerable to connect with other people. Here’s a brief list of the faults I’ve been struggling with. I worry I’m not a good listener. I have a terrible memory. I self-diagnosed myself with ADD. I compare myself to others too much. I try to be funny when I should try to be compassionate. I start too many sentences with the word “I”.

The Reward

Today, I’m excited to check out of my hotel for the last time and go “home”. After a short stint with Lauren’s parents, we’ll be moving out to Terre Haute to settle into our new normal. We can’t wait to see what that looks like.

I can’t wait to:

Live with my wife (!)

Cook on a grill again

Use full-sized shampoo bottles

Not have to call to extend hotel/car reservations continuously

Not share walls with strangers

I’ll miss:

Getting to know people in new places, not as a tourist

Exploring new cities all the time

Breakfast that’s made for you every day between 6-9:30am

Someone who sneaks in while you’re at work and cleans your room

Driving rental cars

I’m thrilled to have the opportunity to own/operate the Chick-fil-A in Terre Haute and for all of the opportunities that will bring. We’ll employ 90+ people and serve food to a town of 70,000. I’ve never been more excited/nervous/scared/overjoyed. God has put us here for a reason and we’re eager to see what that is.

Thank You

Our family and friends. For never calling us crazy, and understanding (or pretending to) what the heck we’re doing with our lives. For being gracious as we miss birthdays, holidays, weddings, and every other important milestone along the way

The Chick-fil-A community. The friendships and relationships we’ve made in the last two years have been such an unexpected blessing. We’re so thankful to have those to carry forward with us out of this program.

Lauren. The sacrifices you have made in the past two years are something I will never be able to thank you for properly. You let me miss Christmas, Thanksgiving, birthdays, and litter box scoopings. Most of all, we sacrificed about 650 days of togetherness and the comfort that brings. All for the support of a crazy dream. I am in awe of your steadfast love and support.

God. For bringing us through this time and this journey with more blessings than we deserve.

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jjjkily · 7 years ago

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My Father, who art in my heart

So, today was Father’s Day. Those of you who have me on social media might’ve seen the gifts and throwback pics I posted for my dad, whom I lovingly call “daddy joe”. If I’m being completely honest, I was never planning on doing anything super extravagant for my dad. Both my parents and I have always had somewhat of a rough relationship. After moving out for college, I barely called home, and even more rarely would I visit. (I even spent most of my Thanksgiving and Spring Break away from them in different cities.) My relationship with my father has hit very deep lows (in both argumentative strife and physical altercation) at times, and we’ve always had to put in effort towards having a better communication. Out of both my parents, I definitely have felt a deeper connection and understanding of my father, though my mother is the easier one to talk to (usually on more superficial matters). But today, today was a special day. I woke up today to the sounds of my parents yelling at me and each other in a hurry to get to church. After they left, I contemplated going back to sleep or actually getting out of bed and doing something. I decided to do something since last year I kinda rocked Mother’s Day and Father’s Day never really got its moment to shine due to an emergency trip to a homeopathic doctor in Houston for my dad’s arthitis. I thought of my dad’s favorite food and fairly cheap-priced desires. I went to Walmart, purchased ingredients and a couple cute gifts, and headed home to prep the meal. After the meal was done cooking and my parents still weren’t home, I got a little worried. My mind, of course, went to the worst possible scenario and I wondered if they had gotten into an accident. To calm myself, I looked through old photos and thought of older memories – good ones – that I had with my father. When I was younger, my father and I would spend every spring season gardening. We would plant flowers around the beloved big oak trees that shaded our house. It was something I would look forward to doing all year. As I got older, and my opinion of my father changed, I refused to work with him on this. Personally, looking back, I was unhappy with a lot of things in my life, and I took it out on people who were mostly undeserving of my wrath. I held my parents to a standard that was nearly inhumane- a standard of sheer perfection that was born when I truly idolized them as a child but was unreasonable to continue as I shaped my own perpsective. A couple years ago, my father decided to remove both of the huge oak trees that guarded the house. It upset me but it was a logical decision; the grass had turned yellow because of the obstruction of sunlight that the trees caused. Now, there are no flowers in our garden, and the good times I used to spend with my father has withered away as well. People often tell me that I am the spitting image of my father. Not only do I look like him, but I think like him too. Part of this contributed to the fact that we were so stubborn our arguments and fights. Part of this also contributed to the fact it was (and still is) hard for me to ask my dad for help. In my first year of college, I would go days without food or rationing to one meal a day because I couldn’t swallow my pride and ask my dad for money I needed. He was very stringent about money when I was a child, and I always felt inherently bad for asking for more of it. In March, I got my first speeding ticket, I couldn’t bring myself to tell my dad about so I spent an extra hundred dollars of my own money so it wouldn’t be his burden. In the end, my dad found out due to increased insurance rates, and we had a huge fight about it. Growing up, my dad would always talk about how his own father never helped him financially, so I inherited my father’s mindset towards his own father. My parents eventually did come home, and I gave my dad both of his presents while we ate lunch, a meal that I cooked. One of the presents were slippers that my dad wanted to be exchanged for a smaller size. I agreed to go back to Walmart in that moment and exchange it. I didn’t mind because I loved to drive and it was going to be a quick trip before my mom’s new work shift. On my way back from Walmart, I stopped prior to making a left turn but I forgot to check my right view. Seemingly out of nowhere, I hit a white Honda in the backseat of the passenger’s side. After a moment of complete shock, my mind raced. I’m gonna be completely honest: part of me wanted to just drive away in that moment as the damage on both cars was solely cosmetic, but I knew in my heart my dad taught me better than that. I signaled the other driver to pull into a nearby lot, which happened to be an emergency clinic. I relunctantly called my father and told him what happened. He immediately headed over. As a I waited for him, my heart flooded with guilt- all I had wanted to do was celebrate my dad for his sacrifices and I had ended only costing him more. I sat and dwelled on how my father would yell at me. I knew in my heart that the every insult I could imagine him saying would completely right. I felt worthless, yet as my father pulled up to the scene, something was different. He didn’t yell at me; we talked and he was pretty understanding, which left me confused and ultimately even more guilty. When we got home, my dad, of course, made me tell my mom what happened to her car. She was reasonably upset, and she started yelling at me the way I expected my father to. My dad, in that moment, came to my defense and respectably told my mom to back off. I, all the while, remained speechless. I went to my room and sulked, beating myself up. Soon after, my dad came in and tried to comfort me again, but I wouldn’t let myself be comforted. I spent the rest of the day trying to make it up, thinking of ways I could make and save money to pay for the damage, and hopefully, even, a new car. I couldn’t take thinking about it any longer and I almost went to bed. When I told my dad that I was about to go to sleep, he insisted on having family prayer early, which we usually do every night with my mom but because of her new work schedule should’ve been postponed till midnight, when she got home. When I grabbed the Bible from the shelf, I winced in pain and I noticed a bruise on my arm where the steering wheel had been. My dad saw the bruise, and finally raised his voice (mostly) out of concern. He insisted that I needed to pray more to help my physically and spiritually, which was odd to hear from him because 1) he is not the most religious man and 2) he hadn’t known that I skipped church that day. It hit close to home and it set me off – I broke down and I told him that I don’t think I should ever drive anymore because I was so terrible at it. Instead of his usual teasing and goading of insults, he told me that it wasn’t true. I apparently have shown him so many times that I can be a good driver, though today I definitely wasn’t the best. He gave me confidence and said I shouldn’t be scared going forward because my many mistakes. Instead of feeling guilty, I should learn from it. It was the first time in 19 years that I was glad to have asked my dad for help. I don’t know what I’m trying to accomplish in writing this. Maybe I’m pointing out a vicious cycle of parent-child behavior that we can actively change. Maybe I’m pushing for people to get to understand their parents before being upset that their parents don’t understand them. Not just by getting who your parents currently, but be asking about their life before you, or maybe even when they were you. Maybe I’m just a girl sitting in her room with swollen eyes and a puffy nose trying register what may have been a significant moment in her life. Maybe I’ve just been having a shitty day and typing it all out on a Word document is way cheaper than therapy. Either way, Happy Father’s Day.

#father #father's day #prayer #shitty #it gets better #Bible #parents #parent-child #relationship

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glsthanksgiving · 7 years ago

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“With Talent On Loan from God…” — A Thanksgiving Celebration

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On this Thanksgiving, I thank God for the talents and gifts that He has bestowed upon my family and me and that is no doubt the reason why I love to see people do what they are truly talented and gifted by God to do. It is a blessing to see singers, musicians, actors, actresses, athletes in all sports, writers, speakers, business people, doctors, cooks, auto mechanics, lawyers, and leaders of all types seemingly without effort and almost flawlessly doing what they were given by God the talents and the gifts to do. Their talents (or gifts) come from God, and He has blessed the world with an abundance of and an array of talents. Every time we see these talents on display, we ought to be thankful to God for them and for the way in which many people use them to benefit and bless society. Many years ago, I heard a popular secular radio talk show host begin his radio broadcasts with the phrase ‘with talent on loan from God…’ Even though I have not listened to him in years, that phrase stuck with me. It was good for him to know that whatever talents and gifts he has they came from God, and it is good for all of us to know that, and we all should give God thanks. God is the source of each of the gifts and talents that people have received. First Peter 4:10-11 says, “As every man hath received the gift, even so minister the same one to another, as good stewards of the manifold grace of God. If any man speak, let him speak as the oracles of God; if any man minister, let him do it as of the ability which God giveth: that God in all things may be glorified through Jesus Christ, to whom be praise and dominion for ever and ever.” These verses tell us that every person has received talents from God and that it is their responsibility to use those talents for the good of others. Every time someone uses the talents God has given them, they bring glory to their Creator, and we should offer thanksgiving to God for the talents that He gives to us to use for His glory, praise, and honor. Many people do not hesitate to honor God as the source of their great talent, and they seek to honor and glorify God by the use of their talents. Many have also spoken of their faith in God and in Jesus Christ as the foundation of their success in life. Listen to these words from some people whom you might recognize. Oscar-award winning actor, Matthew McConaughey, said, “First off I want to thank God, because that’s who I look up to. He’s graced my life with opportunities that I know are not of my hand or any other human hand. He has shown me that it’s a scientific fact that gratitude reciprocates. In the words of the late (British actor) Charlie Laughton, who said, ‘When you got God you got a friend…’” Super-bowl winning quarterback of the Seattle Seahawks, Russell Wilson, “First of all, God is so good. He brought me here a mighty long way. My dad used to always tell me, ‘Russ, why not you?’ And what that meant was believe in yourself, believe in the talent God has given you even though you are 5 foot 11, and you can go a long way.” NBA star, Kevin Durant, said, “When I’m talking in front of people or when people tell me I’m great, I remind myself that I can always be better. I’ve just got to be thankful to the Lord for the gifts He’s given me. My gift back to Him is to always be humble and to work as hard as I can.” Peyton Manning, a Super Bowl-winning quarterback, said, “At age 13, I committed my life to Christ, and that faith has been most important to me ever since… My faith doesn’t make me perfect, it makes me forgiven, and provides me the assurance I once looked for. I’ve been blessed [to] have so little go wrong in my life, and [have been] given so much.” Political analyst and columnist, Kirsten Powers, said, “I don’t really feel like I had any courage when I became a Christian, I just gave in. I wasn’t courageous; I didn’t have any choice. I kept trying to not believe but I just couldn’t avoid [accepting Christ]. If I could have avoided it, I would have. There is nothing convenient about it in my life or in the world I live in. It’s not like living in the South where everybody is a Christian. I live in a world where nobody is a believer. But God pursued me.” Olympic gold medalist, Allyson Felix, said, “My faith is the reason I run – it calms my heart and makes everything feel like a lift. My speed is definitely a gift from [God], and I run for His glory. ” Truett Cathy, the late, great businessman and founder of Chick-fil-A, said, the main purpose of his business is “to glorify God by being a faithful steward of all that is entrusted to us; and, to have a positive influence on all who come in contact with Chick-fil-A.” Odell Beckham, Jr., of the New York Giants, who recently made what many are calling the greatest catch in NFL history, is also a believer. On the night of the now famous catch, he gave God the glory by saying, “God gave me this talent.” The day after making his amazing catch, he said, “I wanna thank God for everything he’s doing in my life.” He also said, “God is good. That’s an understatement. He’s always on time, maybe not when you want him to be but always when the time is right! God puts people and obstacles in our lives not for us to fail, but to bless us in mysterious ways that our own understanding can’t imagine… If you don’t know God, my advice? Get to know him! And If you do know God, get closer to Him!” Madison Bumgarner, the pitcher for the World Series-winning San Francisco Giants, said, “If it weren’t for my faith, there is no way I would be where I am at today. My faith is a really big part of my career and my life… The biggest thing I want people to know about me is that I am a believer, I’m a Christian, not just that I’m a baseball player or any of the other stuff I like to do… Jesus Christ means everything to me. He is my Saviour and I live for Him. I don’t want to live for myself; I want to live for Him.” Actress and author, Candace Cameron Bure, said, “God has changed me in ways that words can’t describe. He has transformed the way I think and live my life. Things that were once important to me are no longer. I can’t help but share the Good News with everyone! I know there is nothing more important. I know that without Christ, the eternal consequences are devastating. I urge you to surrender your whole life to Jesus, turn from your sin and trust in Him with all your heart.” Denzel Washington said, “I believe that Jesus is the Son of God. I’ve been filled with the Holy Spirit. I know it’s real… I’ve always understood why I’ve been blessed to be put in this situation [acting and directing]. And I’m more than happy to take advantage of it and to preach, if you will, about what God has done in my life.” American musician, Sheila E., said, “[After a period of difficulty in my life] I decided, ‘You know what, Lord? If you just give me another chance, I’ll do whatever you want me to do.’ I got the Bible and I started reading and I kept it on my chest. I slept with it and never took it out of my hand for weeks.” Bobby Bowden, the second-winningest coach in college football, said, “If you love [God] and serve Him and try to be loyal to Him and obedient to Him, He’s not going to let you fail. That’s the thing that has happened to me.” Albert Pujols (Pu-holz) of the St. Louis Cardinals said, “My life’s goal is to bring glory to Jesus. My life is not mostly dedicated to the Lord, it is 100% committed to Jesus Christ and His will. God has given me the ability to succeed in the game of baseball. But baseball is not the end; baseball is the means by which my wife and I glorify God. Baseball is simply my platform to elevate Jesus Christ, my Lord and Savior.” Country singing star, Carrie Underwood said, “I grew up going to church camp and reading my Bible and having different faith books and movies in my life…My songs are sometimes focused on God, Jesus and faith, and that is a part of my “Bible Beltness,” where such themes are popular. I was not the first, nor will I be the last, to sing about God.” Tim Howard, the U.S. soccer goalkeeper, who also has Tourette’s syndrome said, “Living with Tourette’s is not easy. But God has blessed me with the gift of athleticism as well. He has done some powerful things in my life through the combination of these two gifts. He also has shown me ways to use my position as a professional athlete to encourage others with Tourette’s syndrome. Today, I am blessed to be living a dream. And yet, if it all went away tomorrow, I know I would still have peace. That probably sounds crazy to most people, but that’s the kind of peace Christ gives. It is rooted in His love, and it surpasses all understanding. You can experience this same sense of love and peace, too. All you have to do is ask for it.” Award-winning actor and director, Blair Underwood, said, “I am a Christian. I believe God has a plan. I believe he is not going to leave us hanging. As a man, in our society, I don’t have all the answers. Being able to turn matters over to a higher power works for me.” Super Bowl-winning coach Tony Dungy said, “You are never going to get anywhere in sports or in life until you become convinced of the truth of the gospel of Jesus Christ. You may become a professional athlete or have fame and nice cars and nice houses and a lot of money, but what you’ll find is that all of that stuff goes away pretty quickly. You have to understand that Christ died for our sins, and that He died not just to be our Savior but so that He could be the center of our lives.” Michelle Williams, one third of the popular group, Destiny’s Child, said, “[Despite some criticism that I have received for doing both secular and Gospel music,] I believe that I am doing my part to be a witness for Jesus Christ. Some people will do gospel when their career fails, but I chose to do it at the height of the popularity of Destiny’s Child. And I didn’t want to do it because it was a fad. I wanted to do it because it’s in me. It’s in my heart. God places people in different parts (areas) for different reasons. We know Jesus is coming back soon and I am doing my part to make sure that people know about him as well.” Famed neurosurgeon, Ben Carson, said, “If your priority is to look good in front of people, your life will take a different direction than if your priority is to use the talents that God has given you to make a positive difference in the world. I believe God has a specific purpose for me – and for every other person to whom he gives the gift of life. If there is a God and you believe in him, you know the best is yet to come. I always pray before any operation. I think God helps me know what to do….We’ll always be safe in Jesus Christ if we place our faith in the Lord. Oprah Winfrey said, “I am a Christian. That is my faith. I’m not asking you to be a Christian. If you want to be one I can show you how. But it is not required. I have respect for all faiths… My favorite Bible verse, because I am a Christian, is Acts 17:28. It says, ‘In God I live, and move, and have my being.’ And you want to know why I’m so successful? Because I knew that at four-years-old, I wouldn’t be who I am today without that.” I could go on with the testimonies of many other people who have become successful through the use of their God-given gifts and talents. But, as we close this celebration of the talents that God has given, I want to let you know that you, too, have talents from God, and you can be a success through the talents that He has given you. Pastor Rick Warren said, “Whether you are a musician or an accountant, a teacher or a cook, God gave you those abilities to serve others. You are a manager of the gifts God has given to you. They may be great or small in your eyes, but they matter to God. When God made you, He made an investment in you, and He expects a return on that investment.” I tell people all the time, God did not put you here to do nothing. God wants you to use the talents and gifts He has given you for His glory and for the benefit of others. And when He uses you, you ought to give God thanks. The main way you can begin to give God a return on His investment in you is to give your heart and life to Him today. You see, not only, did God invest in you by giving you unique talents and abilities, but He made a major investment in You when He sacrificed His only Son, Jesus Christ, on the cross so that you would not have to suffer eternal punishment for your sins. Allow me to explain: No matter how talented and gifted you are, and no matter how much you may have accomplished in life, you are still a sinner just like everyone else, and if you do not accept God’s gift of salvation through Jesus Christ, then you will spend eternity in hell. Allow me to show you how you can accept Jesus Christ as your Saviour today. 1. Accept the fact that you are a sinner, and that you have broken God’s law. The Bible says in Ecclesiastes 7:20: “For there is not a just man upon earth that doeth good, and sinneth not.” Romans 3:23 reads: “For all have sinned and come short of the glory of God.” In fact, I am the chief of sinners, so don’t think that you’re alone. 2. Accept the fact that there is a penalty for sin. The Bible states in Romans 6:23: “For the wages of sin is death…” 3. Accept the fact that you are on the road to hell. Jesus Christ said in Matthew 10:28: “And fear not them which kill the body, but are not able to kill the soul: but rather fear him which is able to destroy both soul and body in hell.” The Bible says in Revelation 21:8: “But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.” 4. Accept the fact that you cannot do anything to save yourself! The Bible states in Ephesians 2: 8, 9: “For by grace are ye saved through faith: and that not of yourselves: it is a gift of God. Not of works, lest any man should boast.” 5. Accept the fact that God loves you more than you love yourself, and that He wants to save you from hell. Jesus Christ said in John 3:16, “For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life.” 6. With these facts in mind, please repent of your sins, believe on the Lord Jesus Christ and pray and ask Him to come into your heart and save you this very moment. The Bible states in the book of Romans 10:9, 13: “That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised Him from the dead, thou shalt be saved.” “For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.” Dear friend, if you are willing to believe on the Lord Jesus Christ for salvation, please pray with me this simple prayer: Heavenly Father, I realize that I am a sinner and that I have done some bad things in my life. For Jesus Christ sake, please forgive me of my sins. I now believe with all of my heart that Jesus Christ died for me, was buried, and rose again. Lord Jesus, please come into my heart and save my soul and change my life today. Amen. If you believed in your heart that Jesus Christ died on the cross, was buried, and rose again, allow me to say, congratulations on doing the most important thing in life and that is accepting Jesus Christ as your Lord and Saviour! For more information to help you grow in your newfound faith in Christ, go to Gospel Light Society.com and read “What To Do After You Enter Through the Door“. Jesus Christ said in John 10:9, “I am the door: by me if any man enter in, he shall be saved, and shall go in and out, and find pasture.” God loves you! We love you! May God bless you! And Happy Thanksgiving!

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annabankesterbeautyblogger · 7 years ago

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Happy Monday beauties! Today I finally have a Weekly Update… It’s more of a monthly update this time. In today’s post, I have a ton of pics of what I did in November and a few MOTD’s to show ya’ll. I tested a lot of new products, my husband and I celebrated our 2nd Wedding Anniversary, there was a birthday, bands, visits with family and tons of good food. Also a full month on the Keto diet.

Let’s jump in!

The Makeup and Misadventures

October 31st, 2017

Starting back on October 31st.Halloween was spent running errands. My husband had a doctor’s appt that day. So I did this Orange smoky eye and winged liner using the KVD Saints & Sinner Palette paired with a plummy lip to a least look a little festive. I’m not sure why this wasn’t in my last Weekly Edit, probably because I was late posting this look on Instagram.

We went to a get together that evening so I amped the look up with some glitter from WetNWild and a glimmer shade from the Kat Von D Saints & Sinners palette like I did in my Shadow Sun Tutorial which will be linked below. We had already done our Halloween partying so I was keeping it simple.

November 4th, 2017

The weekend of November 4th we spent with my husband’s family down south. Makeup and everything else was kept hella simple. We hung out with his mom, dad, and nephews most of the Friday and early Saturday. I love going down to see them.

This is the view from the back porch, how could you not love looking out at that.

We also brought Pumpkin who got to go off leash and have her best day ever running around with Buddy the Lab. He loves him some Pumpkin.

I also got treated to a latte!

Saturday evening was more of an adventure. We stayed over at Ross’s sister’s house and ventured out to a dive bar in the middle of NOWHERE called the Topsy V. Ross and I were hella iffy on this excursion but his sister promised it was cool, so we drove the 25 mins of back road to get to this hole in the wall of a bar and surprisingly it was pretty legit. The town it is in literally only has this bar and a gas station… Anyway, I learned how to play darts and found a new skill there. I hate playing pool but this was the first dart game I had tried and really enjoyed it. The highlight of the night was Ross’s sister getting a drink and there were about 50 gnats floating in it. LOL! We made it home around midnight and crashed.

November 7th, 2017

This was Ross and Mine’s 2nd Wedding Aniversary night. I wanted to go full glam so I did this look using the Kat Von D Saints & Sinners Palette and the Anastasia Beverly Hills Modern Renaissance Palette paired with BH Cosmetics Metallic Liquid Lipstick in Amber.

This has to be one of the best liquid lippies I have tried in a while.

For our anniversary date night, we went to Outback. We have a thing about going to Outback for our special date nights. It’s our thing. We shared this amazing dessert that was a s’mores ice cream cookie thing. Fuck me up, BITCH! it was so good.

Afterward, we hit the bar and stayed until about 3am hanging out with friends. It was a damn good night.

November 16th? 2017

And at this point, my dates get foggy AF, this was around the 16th. On this day I was doing a wear test with the Fenty Foundation, more on that is coming. I am working on a whole post. This was another day of errands. In this look, I used the Anastasia Beverly Hills Modern Renaissance paired with Tarte Tarteist Quick Dry Liquid Lipstick in Obsessed. I have a full review of those linked below. I think all I did on this day was get groceries and nothing much else so I did another wear tests over the next couple of days.

Spoiler of how I feel about the Fenty foundation.

November 17th, 2017

Another day of wear tests with the Fenty foundation and the Tarte Lights Camera Lashes Liquid Eye Liner. The review will be linked below. The products got tested super well on this day.

I also feel in love the Wet N Wild Renegade Mascara.

We had lunch at one of our favorite spots called Wildwood Pizza. They have the best keto friendly salads of life. I had a roasted chicken salad.

After that, I spent the rest of the early afternoon walking around the mall which is just something I enjoy doing out of nostalgia. I also hit up Sephora and Ulta, of course, This was a pretty warm day and I did a lot after we got back home from working on blog posts to some housework. I wore the products a good 10 + hours.

November 18th, 2017

This was Saturday before last, we had a friend staying over so we hit up the bar to see a band that was playing. I was in the mood some a really dark look. In this one, I used the Kat Von D Saints and Sinners Palette and the Tarte Tarteist Amazonian Clay Pro Eyeshadow Palette paired with Nyx Liquid Suede in Brooklyn Thorn.

This ended up being a pretty strange night when an old friend showed up but it was a good night, the bands were great. I didn’t get in until almost 4 am I think, then got up around 11am and went to Buffalo Wild Wings for lunch during the Saints game.

November 22nd, 2017

This was the day before Thanksgiving and my BFF’s birthday. This is the look from my …Of Dreams and Drama Tutorial (Linked Below) like I said in the post I did this look with her in mind.

This night was a blast. We had sushi (my cheat meal) then went bowling until they ran us out.

For Thanksgiving, the next day Ross and I ended up at Golden Corral in damn near our PJ’s because NOTHING was open. We were just wanting something quick because I was cooking that evening. Ended up having a second cheat meal and feeling the shame of just eating at Golden Corral where you literally feel like cattle. The only walk of shame I have experienced is that walk to the car from there.

November 24th, 2017

My little Sephora VIB haul came in! I finally picked up the Subculture palette, a review is a coming and I picked up the new glow kit, and a Sephora Faves lippy set.

November 25, 2017

I used the Subculture. Here’s what she looks like after one use.

Just fine! There is more to come on this and the looks I have done with it. Below is just a quick pic I snapped on Instagram stories before I left the house.

Saturday was a fun night. A few friends and I went to see Mojo Killjoy at The Melting Pot and hung out at the bar for a bit.

I don’t know for sure which day I made this for breakfast but it’s another one of my go-to keto meals. Scrambled eggs, cheese, and spinach on a wheat tortilla. Maybe 5 carbs in this meal.

Speaking of keto, I have been doing it for a full month. Intermittent fasting and around 20 – 25 carbs a day. Some days are more, just depends but so far I am down 14 pounds. Ross is in his first week right now. So far so good and so easy. Keto flu only lasted 3 days, but I struggle staying hydrated and have caused myself some issues there. TMI. Water water water!

The Funny

The Pumpkin

Because Pumpkin was full of cute as usual.

That wraps up my last 3 weeks and almost all of November. I’ll see ya tomorrow for a Lust or Bust and Wednesday for a review maybe. Good Night beauties!