#also guzma HATES HIS ASS

[th3tawaves]

Team skull admin OC because I am insane. Yes Ellyss got rewritten for Pokemon brainrot SUE me!!!!!!! He’s a poison type specialist, his ace is his dear scolipede Carnage.

He’d also show up in Sword and Shield, but notably left Team Skull before it was officially disbanded… I would love to take his hand and show him how to dress better but I fear this is peak.

[thenixkat]

Hi sorry for asking im just genuinely curious, what are all the changes you'd make to the sun/ moon anime? Stuff like lusamine, guzma, etc. I love seeing you pop up in the guzma tag to rant abt how they butchered my guy, and im curious of all the stuff you'd personally change abt the anime bc it. It has problems. Sorry again for asking i just love disecting my fav media and discussing its flaws and how to better them!!!!

The biggest change would be letting Lusamine be a villain which in turn would let just about every character that got shafted actually get to have their stories.

Not shying away from her abuse which caused both Gladion and Lillie to runaway from home taking pokemon that were tortured by Lusamine with them. (Hell, you could even hint at some of the issues in Alolan society with overlooking/not talking about or helping with abuse)

Getting rid of the pokemon school angle since, the trial captains literally have only approximately an 8 year that they can be trial captains if the age cut-off is twenty and folks are expected to start their island challenge at 11. Those kids don't have the time to be dicking around at school, especially not the older ones like Kiawe and Mallow. Like, being a trial captain is a huge fucking honor in their society and they'd likely prioritize it over other stuff. Also, I don't care for nerfing characters for no good reason.

Storywise, I think using a combination of the story from the Sun/Moon game with some of the stuff from the Manga version of the story that managed to use stuff from Ultra without downplaying Lusamine's shit could make for the best adaption of the story with a few tweaks. -> Instead of the pokemon school plot, why not have Ash try his hand at being a research assistant? It'd be something new to do with him, give him a reason to be around and work with the professors, give him extra reason to explore Alola, and interact with Aether Foundation, and come in conflict with Team Skull. -> I can also see him trying his hand at the Island Challenge b/c of course, he's the protag. Hell, he can even make friends with the trial captains along the way.

-> Let Lillie be the deuteraganist proper! Let her be an actual trainer to Nebby! I hate some much that the games want us to have her pokemon just cause its the fucking box legendary, that's her pokemon and by all rights it would make more sense for her to catch it b/c that would be safer for Nebby in the long run. -> Not putting Hau on a damn bus for 97 episodes! He's the game *rival*, he's a major fucking character. Let this boy be present from jump and be both Lillie and Ash's rival. Explore his feelings about being stuck in Hala's shadow, the MC's shadow, and his sympathies with Team Skull.

-> ( A complaint I have with the games is I don't think Team Skull should be as rude or distant to Gladion as they are. Like, why would they make fun of him for being homeless if they're squatting in a rundown building? If Team Skull are supposed to be a group of homies and found family against the world, why wouldn't they adopt Gladion's prickly ass and tease him for being an edgelord? Also, just while Guzma acknowledges and respects Gladion for also escaping from and abusive household and wanting to get as strong as he can, I want more to be done with that than just paying lip service. Let them bond. ) -> Ah, yes, where was I? Gladion as a member of Team Skull. Not just hired help/an enforcer like in the games but an actual member. Let him bond with them damnit. And also keep him in a rival role to Ash while being a bad guy. Hell, its been a long time since I've watched the older pokemon seasons but it'd be fun to have a bad guy who keeps a long-running win streak over Ash. Let him keep his anime win streak and be a 'bad' guy.

-> Let Guzma have his role as the decoy big bad! Don't nerf him, don't slander him. Have folks mention him and have him show up at several points and have those eps be fucking heavy for one reason or another. He is a problem of a trainer and knows strategy and covers his team's weaknesses. -> While I hate everything the anime did slandering my guy making him the 'Undefeated' b/c he's a chicken that only targets weaklings, I wanna see Guzma being called the 'Undefeated' for serious, like folks thinking he's a chicken b/c of his ace and not taking every challenge sent his way but no he's actually good like that. I wanna see him beat Ash multiple times, yes Ash needs to beat him at some point to kickstart Guzma's character development but I wanna see him struggle to get that victory. -> You have no idea how much I want to see Guzma interrupt anyone who tries to use a Z move in a battle with him out of pure spite instead of just standing around doing fuck all while folks chant and do the poses. It would make so much more sense if he had his golisopod just sucker punch a pokemon in the middle of the z move stuff. It would be a good way to show that he's ruthless and very intent on bucking tradition. -> After I realized that like Guzma got possessed by a nihiligo in the of games and the manga and we were denied a perfectly good opportunity for a monster!Guzma rampage and opportunity to show how much Team Skull cares about each other that a 'I know yer in there come back to us Boss' and a 'help us save our Boss' could have added, I feel a bit miffed. Like I even commissioned fic to have just that and its good and everyone should read it and share with their friends. -> I do like that Team Skull didn't disband at the end of the anime. Them breaking up is one of the things I don't like about the games. Like, the can reform and stay together. (I also commissioned fic for Team Skull reforming while staying together and its good and everyone should read it and share with their friends)

-> Plumeria would have more things to do if Team Skull in general had more things to do and were taken a lil more seriously than they are in the anime. I do like the idea of her scouting and scoping and infiltrating in disguise. Also, I think she should make it farther in the pokemon league conference than she did b/c she's also a good trainer, and smart, and ruthless too. -> I think if she did make it further in the pokemon league conference and had to fight Guzma then that would be a great opportunity to show that the two characters are actually really good friends and know each other well. Certainly, I'd have Guzma win that fight, I'd also have that fight be the only one where he actually shows good sportsmanship towards his opponent. B/c he likes and respects Plumeria.

When it was on Netflix a few years ago I do remember watching some of the Pokemon Sun/Moon eps. And I remember how strange it felt that the ultra beast stuff had like a goofy Power Rangers type bend with folks suiting up as like a task force to deal with the things and just... idk maybe we should play the aggressive and fearful pokemon from another dimension more seriously. Darker at least. Cause like... ultra beasts kill people, they're a lot more dangerous than pokemon, they can do a good number on the environment more so than the invasives that are native to the dimension that the series takes place in.

[guzmabuglord]

Think it’s bout time I introduce myself proper, eh?

okay. yo. I’m Guzma, hence the username. He/him pronouns 💯. I’m the strongest fuckin trainer in Alola and my favorite thing to do is beating down PUNKS with my dope-ass crew, Team Skull. Bug is the best type of pokemon, so i’ll prolly comment on your bug types if you got any of your own. (and you SHOULD.) You got any complaints about any of that, you talk to ME. also, i’ll try to update this if there’s ever anythin to add.

That’s all there is to say about me. Here’s a little bout my pokemon. None of em have names, but since ‘parently it’s common round here I might give em some eventually.

Golisopod’s my main man. my ace. been with me since I was a snot nosed punk myself. don’t play favorites with my guys but he’d be my favorite if I did. He’s real scary to other people but he’s chill when he ain’t battling.

Scizor’s always full of energy, which is real nice considerin how I found him. Don’t really know what happened with him, but he’s gotta lot of sun bleaching and scratches on his exoskeleton. He’s a lot smaller than most Scizor, but he thinks he’s smaller and lighter than he is so he likes to lay on me.

Masquerain’s an odd one. started followin me one day and didn’t stop till I offered them a pokeball. Flies faster upside down, which is hella weird. I wake up to them starin me down sometimes?? Pals with my Ariados.

Pincir’s prolly my smartest. mold breaker’s damn useful on him and he likes it when it trips up people we’re fightin. Real menace. Helps me with sudoku sometimes which is kinda fuckin scary.

Vikavolt’s protective and real good at trackin folks down and gettin me places. He never forgets a face or a place, so he’s my livin map. He likes bein scratched on the outside of his mandibles.

Ariados is real stocky and level headed, so he balances Masquerain out. His old trainer was real fuckin nasty to him so I beat him down and he gave me Ariados. he’s still kinda independent and makes his own webs to sleep in sometimes.

Joltik’s not one I bring out to battle, but I found her with Vikavolt. think they’re family so I had to get em both. she’s real sweet and I spend time with her sometimes when it’s real late and I can’t sleep. Gives me static electricity shocks by accident sometimes.

Venipede’s pretty new. got it on here a few weeks back from my pal Dashy. ‘pparently some bad guys dumped it at zeir gym door, so i’m tryna help it feel better for the time being. It’s real fast, and it goes for walks with me and Golisopod. Thinkin it might evolve sometime, so tryna prepare for that.

Just got a Nymble egg in the mail, so i’ll prolly be gettin one of those soon enough. Real hyped for it!

speakin of. If it’s needed, send any bug types needin care my way. Got plenty of space.

…One more thing. I’m the BEST fuckin bug type trainer out there, dammit. Remember that.

((OOC INFO UNDER THE CUT!))

hi!! 👋 welcome to my guzma rp blog. this is mostly me just having a little fun with this guy i care about a lot <3 here are some notes though!

- ANON HATE WILL NOT BE TOLERATED! i am fine with people sending “mean” stuff to guzma for whatever reasons they have as he is a gang boss… but there’s obviously a clear line between that and genuine ooc hate. if you’re worried abt me misinterpreting you feel free to add a note or anything!! :3

- this blog is meant to be guzma experiencing tumblr/rotomblr as an application! so i won’t be doing “traditional” roleplay from this guy, sorry :[

- mod is a minor! don’t send 18+ stuff please. (mod is he/him)

- INTERACT!!! interact with anything and everything that isn’t listed as a no-no above!! i LOVE talking to you guys and responding to your asks!!

thanks for reading :3! have a bugterful day

[tethrarisms]

This graphic summing up the Villain Arcs is so funny and so in character at the same time, I can't.

First of all, Archie and Maxie working together since the Hoenn arc, and now making another alliance to take down Giovanni (and maybe Paulo?). But also Maxie, Rose and Colress joining forces because they're the nerd bitchy scientists.

Then there's Lysandre who, after making a truce with Sycamore and Diantha, decided to look for another alliance with Lusamine and Rose in order to defend themselves against Gigi.

And speaking of Lusamine, she and Guzma once more join forces for a greater cause after the whole fiasco in Alola.

Here we still see Cyrus and his team acting alone, but again, against a greater evil. He's the hardest to show character development, but he's getting there little by little.

And then there's this is HILARIOUS hint about how both N and Colress HATE Ghetsis and are throwing hands at both Team Plasma and Team Rocket. Colress have absolute nothing to do with villain teams anymore, he's here just because he hates Ghetsis. I love his sassy ass so much wefoewiwoeow

Don't ask me about Team Yell. They're here too, I guess.

I'm having the time of my life with this. I love Pokémon villains so so so much and Pokemas always deliver.

[therotatingvillain]

Funny things in Baby Steps, my unfinished Pokevillain fanfic

Alright, after spending too long in a severe depression hole and also spending like way too much time at work, here I am again!

This is gonna be my first update on the Pokevillain fanfiction that my last post was about. What I’m doing is reading through those 43 pages and just get a base understanding of what the fuck I was even doing.

To have all of you be part of this, you’ll get my live thoughts about it! So be ready for some shitposting and a few sneak peeks at the story haha

Cyrus insisting on just being called ‘Cyrus’ because ‘Mr. Akagi’ reminds him of his father is such a mood. Also, yeah, I use their japanese names as their last names, except Guzma, because Guzmas japanese name is Guzma lol So for him I just used his german name ‘Bromley’. Such an ass name

Having stayed in a hospital for the first time not too long ago, 2020 me was surprisingly accurate when it came to hospital food

“What do you think? Aren’t you supposed to be incredibly smart?” She kept smiling, but Cyrus knew it was fake. It had been ever since she entered. It was the same smile his mother always had when talking to guests or clients. God I hate Cyrus nurse, I made her such a bitch lmao

Forgot I made Cyrus lactose intolerant lol

That smile made Cyrus want to go back into the distortion world No comment needed

‘New Guy’ seemed like a major downgrade from ‘God of a new dimension’ but for now, having terribly failed the latter one, the first one was acceptable. 2020 me had banger humor

Guzma looking at Cyrus and just going “You’re my friend now” is how I make all of my friends

Ah yeah, Giovanni is there because of another failed attempt, except for Guzma the rest is there because of court mandation and Guzma is there because Nanu got him a spot.

almost like touching a Rotom that couldn’t quite control its energy. Foreshadowing? Maybe

Guzma immediately having Cyrus back even when Cyrus is clearly in the wrong is so funny to me

Aaaaaaaah gays bonding over piano music

Ah yes, Maxie and Archie are divorced husbands. Yes, they still love each other, yes, Maxie still actively wears his wedding ring while Archie always has it on him somehow

“Hey fuckers, time for lunch!” Mood Guz

Lysandre desperately trying to socialise with his roommate only to routinely be fucked over by his own shitty mental health and eating disorder is too real man

Dr. Roberts is such a kind soul, he’s the therapist OC I created specifically for this story and he’s just a sweetie who’s fantastic at his job and also, obviously, gay and married with a couple kids.

Cyrus went to college (duh) and majored in: Electrical Engineering, Economics, Computer Engineering, Political Science and Computer Science. And finished all his majors in 4 years. Yikes dude, my boy just wanted to study the stars but he was denied by his bullshit parents

Ah yes, Cyrus sister. Buckle in people, time for a bit of lore:

So we all remember the Old Chateau in Eterna Forrest back in gen 4, right? Right. For a long time there was a theory that perhaps Cyrus grew up in that house. How did we come to that conclusion? Basically, Cyrus in Platinum (and the USUM Rainbow Rocket episode) has a severe obsession with the Pokemon Rotom, supplying Charon with detailed notes and diaries all about it and in the Rainbow Rocket episode, he nearly has a breakdown upon seeing the Rotom dex. Now where do you find Rotom in Gen 4? Hiding in a TV in the Old Chateau. So, we theorized that Cyrus grew up there. What else do we find in the Old Chateau? The spirits of a butler and a small girl. So, the theory goes that Cyrus used to have a little sister, but she and a butler of the family were killed in an accident, probably involving the Rotom Cyrus kept, most likely hidden from his parents. Afterwards, his family moved to Sunyshore, leaving the Chateau, where Rotom was still hiding, possibly having come back in search of it’s friend (Cyrus) and then hiding in the TV because it was scared as it was alone, Cyrus nowhere to be found, and sought comfort in the electrical appliance. That’s how the theory goes. This theory is true in my story.

Maxie and Archie being extremely angry bordering on violent with each other makes me sad. And I wrote this shit!

The fact that Cyrus, on his first day there, immediately has a panic attack in the evening is relatable.

Also, Giovanni helps him through it and they start bonding and being cute hehe

For every scene involving stargazing, be aware that I have zero idea about stars. I grew up in the middle of fuck nowhere, so I can see them very clearly each night, but I still have little to no idea about how to read stars lol

Lysandre has anorexia and Cyrus is way too oblivious to understand that it’s ana so he’s just constantly like “wow youre thin” until it clicks lmao

Saturn, Jupiter, Mars and Charon are just codenames and Cyrus never bothered to learn their actual names. Is this also foreshadowing? Maybe hehe

YES CYRUS STAND YOUR GROUND TO THAT PISS POOR EXCUSE OF A NURSE i hate her so much man

Cyrus is a deeply kind person. I will not elaborate yet

Yes, Maxie and Archie get over their shit and back together

Yes, it spirals Giovanni into another suicide attempt

No, I shall not elaborate how one leads to the other

But yeah, there’s a pretty intense part of this that deals with Giovannis shitty mental state and his active suicide attempt (that only barely failed) and Cyrus ends up having a severe breakdown because of it. Like I said in my last post, this story deals with some heavy topics.

Guz and Ly really take on the roles of dads to Cyrus, to help him be more open in his expression and just be who he is and I think that’s beautiful

His breath was caught in his throat, his chest and stomach spreading a comfortable warmth through his body.

What was this? A heart attack? 

No, those felt different. There was no stabbing pain. I love writing Cyrus

THERAPY POKEMON EVERYONE yes the leaders are getting therapy Pokemon

Here’s a list of who they get:

Giovanni: His Persian

Maxie: Toxel

Archie: Hypno

Cyrus: His Rotom

Ghetsis: Castform

Lysandre: Levanny

Guzma: His Golisopod

I’d love for yall to theorize on why each leader gets their respective Pokemon! I actually put some thought in all of them haha

Cyrus grandfather has a big role in Cyrus’ recovery, and it starts with a simple visit that is still one of my favorite parts of this story so far

Cyrus grandfather (Paul Akagi) is the polar opposite to his parents, Paul is kind, loving, supportive and really just wants Cyrus to be happy and their relationship???? it warms my heart

A big part of connection for all of the leaders, specifically everyone else and Ghetsis, is a broken piano in the common room that they all work together to fix and that piano really is a symbol for Cyrus’ recovery and especially his willingness to get better.

GUZMA IS TRANS and this is a fact because I am trans and I said so. Also Ghetsis is a bigot. End of sentence lol

Ghetsis saying some transphobic shit and Guzma then going to PULL HIS NON PARALYZED ARM OUT OF ITS SOCKET is such a girly pop move

Also yes everything I’ve written so far ends on Maxie and Archie remarrying and Dr. Roberts allowing everyone to drink alcohol in celebration and yes of course it escalates lol

Alright everyone, that’s it for now, I’m all caught up, hopefully I’ll get some time to actually write a bit more the next few days. 

As always, please please please interact with this, tell me your thoughts so far, ask questions, I NEED IT okay cool thank you.

I have work tomorrow so I shall go and kill myself lol

Have a great whenever you are! Stay hydrated

Love all of you.

[ghetsis-harmonia-ask-blog]

Lord Ghetsis, How do you feel about the other team leaders such as yourself?

Well my good friend, if you're asking who the best leader is, it's obviously me.

But alright, if you truly want to know what I think of them, I'll enlighten tell you.

Giovanni is probably the only bearable one. He understands my struggles when it comes to the fact that we were beat TWICE by children, but he gets in the way of my plans of world domination. Although I did go to him for help taking care of the freak

Maxie and Archie are both foolish, they're utter buffoons with their stupid plans and I think they'd be more productive serving me than whatever the hell that shitshow they had going on in Hoenn was

Cyrus is just too depressed. I'm not an optimist but even I can admit the damn guy need to cheer up a little. He's honestly pathetic and I want him to kill himself

Colress, hate his guts. I let him use MY tools and MY resources and he decided to go and say "oh I simply despise you" after all I did for his ungrateful ass!

Lysandre is almost as bad as Cyrus, I hate him for how vain he is and I hate Kalos in general. That's all I can say about him. I don't like him

Guzma is a failure and shouldn't even call himself a team leader, team skull isn't even a team, they're just wannabe thugs

Lusamine however is one of the other only decent ones. She knows how to parent right and she's good with pokemon

I haven't really met Rose to really have an opinion on him but he seems a little too pompous. Plus, I'm the first guy to take over the pokemon league, I did that first

You forgot N and Piers.

Don't you dare mention that bastards name in front of me and Piers is just made of shit, he doesn't know what he's doing

Oh, also Penny is just a mindless kid, she doesn't know what she's doing, like Skull and Yell, team Star isn't really a team

[wrenz]

Pokemon sun / moon is one of the best games in the franchise and im sick of people shitting on it constantly.

I have worked with the most annoying men in the world and it's always either

"Oooooh sun and moon was bad bc it didn't have gyms!! They changed the format too much!"

Which, they didn't. Its the same shit in a different font. They just got rid of the gym minions and made you do a 2 minute side quest.

Or

"Yeah I didn't like sun/moon but I liked USUM it's way better"

How. Not only is it a money grab, they ruined the story. And the only reason I'm ever really given is that you can fly through wormholes and catch legendary pokemon.

Pokemon itself is older than me, but I've been playing long enough. Heartgold was my first game and I've had every mainline game since. I actually got Diamond after heartgold but that's besides the point.

THE REAL POINT!

Is that out of every game (and being in elementary school so I don't fully remember some) sun and moon always stuck out the most. I am still chasing the fun I had almost 10!!! Years later in the franchise.

Not only are the islands fun, but the characters and story are so memorable. The writing is genuinely funny.

These ss are still funny and you can't tell me they aren't. Also the grunt telling you "go ahead, I'm not fighting you after watching you beat everyone's ass" basically

But anyways.

The Lillie and Gladion story with their mother meant a LOT to me when I 1st played it. The fact that Nintendo retconed all of that?? And for what reason, I have no idea

Even with the (physical) abuse towards Guzma being strongly implied when you go to his house and talk to his parents?

Idk im really saying nothing but those games don't deserve the hate they got and USUM should burn in hell

[spiralstereo]

TRR [Team Rainbow Rocket] Headcanons Part 2!!

[this one is gonna be shorter then the last sorri lolzies]

-Lusamine-

She kinda exists. Nobody knows what happened to her after all that Ultra Beast shit. She's only really mentioned time to time from Giovanni

Aether Foundation is also kinda gone. I mean, the combination of Lusamine & the Nihilego stuff & TRR taking over, there's nothing else they can really do. Atleast Lillie & Gladion are free now <3

-Guzma-

Bisexual. Has a thing for DILFs & muscular women [Plumeria but they're more like hopeless romantic besties lmao]

He at first wanted to join TRR, but then kinda wanted to be 'different'- also Team Skull wasn't really like evil or anything. They just kinda liked doing petty crime & messing with little kids. Respectable

Still talks with Giovanni. Giovanni is genuinely a chill & reasonable guy, so they don't have any problems with each other. He also kinda found out about Giovanni's thing for Nanu &- it made it a little awkward but now Guzma is starting to realize that Giovanni might need some help-

Unironically has a crush on Ghetsis. It's either the fact that he was drunk & Ghetsis overdressed like usual, or maybe just Guzma's thing for DILFs- but yeah. He still fucking crushes on him, even tried to hit on him. Didn't end well & everyone is concerned about him

Admires Archie. They share dumbass energy, & sometimes hung out whenever Archie wasn't with his surfer boyfriends. Also dislikes Maxie, probably because the first time they met Maxie's judgy ass called him a dick

-Colress-

Aroace. Bro has never even had the thought of being in a relationship X3

Absolutely despises Ghetsis. Hates him & everything he is & stands for. He's absolutely disgusted by the horrible acts he commits & would absolutely kill him if had the chance [oops spoiler-]

Came to TRR after he found out they were going to a party Team Skull had hosted, & there was alcohol. Ghetsis is a party drinker & gets violent when drunk. Also, Guzma had thought it would be a great idea to get the fancy [very alcoholic] wine Ghetsis drinks. That's asking for something bad to happen

Really wanted to befriend Maxie, after finding out he was also a scientist & they could get to know each other. Also admired his work despite being in a completely different field

Gets along really well with N, & is saddened that N believes that Ghetsis is still a good person. They're like besties, but N cares so damn much about Ghetsis it's so fucking sad

Thats all! Sorry it's short. I'll give out more info about this sillies later haha

Alrighty y'know what time it is heheh

TRR [Team Rainbow Rocket] Headcanons!!

[keep in mind this is just my AU you can have your own, this is just how I see these idiots]

[Also- yes I ship Lysandre & Cyrus, because I have my AU & my opinions, so don't like demonetize me saying some other ship is better stfu-]

-Giovanni-

Pansexual. Always been a little fruity, especially since he was a teen, & kinda crushes on Nanu- that's unrelated tho <3

Short as fuck. Like I mean this dude is 5 foot tall, whenever you see like photos of him with the rest of Team Rocket, he's usually standing on a fucking step-stool

Has rlly bad anxiety & shit like that, also takes antidepressants & medication because his mental health used to be rlly rlly bad [because of Ariana & just stressing out about managing Team Rocket] & he'll get like that bad if he goes long enough without them

Actually a decent father unlike his canon counterparts. Took care of Silver instead of putting him up for adoption after Ariana left, basically had to juggle trying not to be a deadbeat dad & managing a big mafia lmao. Silver turned out decent- he doesn't hate Giovanni so yippee!! [they actually get along whoa]

Absolutely fucking hates Professor Oak, due to some *personal* issues in the past.

Can cook rlly good. He actually wanted to get into culinary classes & shit but he got expelled out of highschool & then disowned so that was crushed along with his will to live

-Maxie-

Trans [FTM] Archie is rlly the only one who knows, because he's a nosy fucker lmao. Still has rlly bad body dysphoria- explaining all the layers & oversized jacket [didn't get top surgery because he's a chicken shit so he just wears a binder 24/7]

Not actually from Hoenn [surprise surprise!!]- originally from Orre but moved to Hoenn because it was transphobic as fuck & it genuinely just sucked lolz

One of the only sane ones in TRR, also actually smart [like he didn't wanna like dry up all the water he just wanted to make more islands in Hoenn- still a dangerous method haha]

Salty as fuck. Will find something annoying or unlikable about you, he doesn't care who the hell you are he will do it. Also, he fucking hates Archie- probably cuz he screws up his damn research & drags him along lmao

Overworks himself all the damn time, & has a bad habit of putting himself in uncomfortable situations- such as choosing his admins. Maybe he should've gotten to know Courtney & Tabitha more before making them the Team Magma admins [oki oki but Tabitha gives off the vibes that he streams League of Legends in a damn maid outfit every night. Also I don't like Courtney because she just gives off those creep vibes eugh]

-Archie-

Gay & polyamorous. All the surfer guys in Alola are NOT fucking safe because he's there lmao. Also him & Matt are exes, but since no hard feelings they're still friends

Aggressive wholesomeness 24/7- also THE ultimate extrovert who tries to be on good terms with everyone except if you're Ghetsis because if you're Ghetsis fuck you [he's an absolute sweetheart but also a dumbass]

Dumb as fuck. Half the shit he pulls he just did because he felt like it or he was bored- he doesn't have a goddamn reason he just fucking did it

His Sharpedo's name is Grace. This is very important because Grace is love Grace is life

Gives everyone stupid nicknames & makes horrible jokes & puns. Sometimes it's fucking unbearable because they're so damn cheesy & Maxie is yelling from across the room telling him to shut the fuck up but he thinks he's goddamn hilarious

-Cyrus-

Greysexual. Attracted to his opposite [sweet cute guys aka Lysandre]

He's emo guys!!! Omg real!!! If he's not wearing his Galactic uniform he's wearing oversized grunge style clothing- you will never see him wearing anything with colour. Also yes he wears eyeliner & people assume he wears eyeshadow but nah that's just his dark ass eyebags

He's a fucking empath & it's hilarious. He hates it because he tries so damn hard to ignore his emotions which only makes his already rapidly declining mental health worse

Horrible sleep schedule & just terrible at taking care of himself in general. He's running off of goddamn energy drinks & coffee- he won't sleep unless he passes out from exhaustion lmao. Also he only rlly eats like popcorn [which is usually like he's up at 2 in the morning watching a space documentary & he just binge eats it because he hasn't eaten in two weeks or something]

THE ultimate space nerd. If you even mention something space related he will give you a detailed explanation or description about said space thing- also he's got Team Galactic's base is all space themed & they have millions of dollars worth of stolen space tech lmao [autism moment yes Cyrus is autistic]

Has an engineering degree, also graduated highschool when he was 16 & got into college early. Moved out of his parents' house the second he had enough money

-Ghetsis-

Aroace. The most hardcore aroace guy out there. He has trouble with love & shit due to trauma, which also kinda makes it hard for him to admit that he does fucking care about N [he doesn't deserve N]

Do I really have to explain that this guy is fucking insane? Do I? [He's got actual BPD & he's narcissistic as hell but he's just gotten worse. Also autistic but that's not rlly- bad]

He looks like he'd be homophobic- but he's not. He just hates everyone. Also he's not like sexist or anything like that too

The most stylish & extra person you'll meet. He has a giant wardrobe & has all his clothes custom tailored- he has outfits for certain occasions & times, & he absolutely HAS to have the finest of jewelry & has to get himself all dolled up too. Bro is also feminine as hell sometimes. He knows he's fucking pretty

Has the most random talents & hobbies. I mean, he can swordfight- & also knows gardening?? Wha??? Also very musically talented- he plays 'elegant' instruments like the piano & harp

A goddamn drama queen. If his temper wasn't bad enough don't even get started on how damn overdramatic this asshole is. I swear Colress is so done with his shit

-Lysandre-

Asexual/Demiromantic. Attracted to everyone but preferably men, also will only be attracted to someone if he feels like he has an emotional bond with someone lol

Kinda on the dumber side. Also slow on things, like figuring out what he's actually doing. Genuinely a very sweet & kind person, also a bit of a crybaby but that's unimportant [undiagnosed ADHD]

He's a goddamn baker. He has a degree in business & finances or something- only because his parents made him. He's just an idiot lion baker man. That's also the only reason he took over Team Flare, the old leader kinda just appeared in an alley & told him he could have a bakery if he took up the offer lmaoo

Actually from another universe where he got shot by the Ultimate Weapon, but got swip swapped by Colress because why not!! Because it was a blast full of Xerneas's power [the whimsical deer fairy Pokemon of fucking life] he's immortal. He also can't get like injured- he'll just regenerate

He looks so goddamn intimidating- & he's oblivious to it. Half the time it's because he partially has a resting bitch face or he's squinting because he's kinda far-sighted. Whenever someone says something about it he just gets so fucking confused lmaoo

Thats all for now! I'll do a part 2 & maybe some extras for other characters like Colress- but yeah this is all for now lolzies

[bellafragolina]

Guzma's s/o who is another team skull admin that is alot more mean then Plumeria?

(I got that idea like 5 minuts ago)

Is it possible to be that mean?? Goodness!

🍓🍓🍓

Guzma loves you. You're bark is as bad as his, and y'all two go at it constantly. People watching from outside think you two hate each other, and are ready to call the police, but it's how you two express love

"Hey, dipshit."

"Hey, motherfucker, do your knuckles hurt from dragging on the floor?"

"I dunno, do your tits hurt from dragging?"

Domestic violence?? Nah, it's just tough love.

Guzma also likes how you can stick up for yourself. You call out people on their shit and read them to filth in the same breath. No one can beat you in a battle of wits, you're too damn mean. Your tongue is sharp, and Guzma loves seeing you yell out with jackasses you meet on the street, trying to harass Guzma about the team he no longer leads

Nothing like a partner that can kick your ass. As much as he sulks about it, you put Guzma in his place too. Your tough love comes through in making him work on his bad habits, making him a better person without changing him. You treat the grunts the same, scolding them for stupid actions while guiding them towards a better path, though it's by the ear.

Even Plumeria respects you. Y'all two often gossip together, when not have your own mean scraps for fun. Guzma enjoys watching you two go at it, but keeps his distance. Should y'all decide to team up against him, he knows he doesn't stand a chance.

He'll cheer you on from the background as you stand before some poor fool that made the mistake of getting on your bad sides. Guzma has popcorn, soda, and a swarm of eager grunts ready to watch the show

Man he loves you

🍓🍓🍓

Guzma is the kind of man that gives off the preference for partners who can beat him down either physically or emotionally, or both in this case. Have a good night, love!

~Renee

[biostris]

Please any and eberythign for Guzma with a nonbinary reader who is going to cut their hair short? I know I am gonna do it in an it a week and I know I am finally gonna look more like ME but I also know that lots of the people at the place I work at are gonna be like " But you were so PRETTY with your long hair ):" and it's hard to not feel a bit self conscious

A/N: I whole heartedly feel your pain, when I wanted to cut my hair short my mom did everything she could to stop it but I got it anyways and have had my hair short for some time now!! You’ll look wonderful im sure of it!!

Again no gif because tumblr hates me.

:Guzma X NB! Reader HC’s- Haircut:

You had finally made the decision to bite the bullet and cut your hair, you were sick of the feeling that your long hair gave you, not only was the up keep stupid and expensive but also you didn’t think it really fit you

You didn’t mention it to the gang due to the poor responses you had gotten at work, most of which sadly brought up your assigned birth and made things even more bleh-

Even though the squad would never, and they would beat those peoples asses!! But in your mind it was better safe than sorry :(

The day the appointment was made came and you had told Guzma and plumes you were going out to get some groceries and do other things with your pokemon too

Guzma tried to come a long, being the subtly cling man he is but plumes held him back for you as you skedaddled out the door and off to get your hair whacked!

The appointment wasn’t too long and at the end of it you felt fresh, happy and finally you felt like you!! It was such a euphoric feeling as you stepped into the Alolan sun and felt the cool breeze tickle the back of your neck

You came home and immediately the crew was showering you with compliments, both directly and indirectly

“Woah they look so cool!!”

“Way to rock the new do (y/n)!”

It brought a big happy goofy grin to your face to hear so many compliments but you felt nervous about Guzmas reaction. After all some folks didn’t have the best reactions to decisions such as this

When you stepped into his throne room he was of course initially shocked but he jumped up to his feet to greet you asap

He gave you a little kiss on your nose and began to run his fingers through your shorter locks with wonder “I like it! It looks good on you lightning bug!”

Hearing his approval and support made you so happy, especially as he played with your hair, “now if we can only convince you to dye it!! I think you’d look cool in purple.” He jested earning a soft punch from you on his pudge

The whole day Guzma and the crew complimented you and treated you like a monarch. Guzma also helps you do at home cuts for when moneys tight or you just don’t want to get out of the house and even sometimes for the fun of it styles it like his

At the end of the day, long hair, short hair or even no hair he loves you all the same

[adenandraofvespertine]

GUZMA HEADCANONS!!

Some are NSFW, you have been warned.

• Big, warm hands. Not too warm, not too cold.

• Impressive muscle mass with a healthy amount of fat around the tummy, hips and legs. Is self conscious about his squishy bits but will never be open about it, not unless you coax it out.

• Really enjoys food, takes you out to eat a often

• Works out every single day, mainly pushups and punching something. Tuff guy over here.

• A switch but will never admit it

• Can trade between being a soft, doting top to a rough and dominant top. Also has a side to him where he is an awed and enthralled bottom

• Very into body worship, giving and receiving. Likes to make you feel loved and feel loved.

• Great at oral, like mind blowing

• Open to most kinks, bondage and blindfolding are favourite to toy around with

• Really, really likes holding hands.

• Little kisses, all the time, here and there. End of conversation? Kiss. Going off to find something in the store? Kiss. Off to do something? Need help? No? Kiss.

• Long, slow, sleepy kisses before bed and when waking up.

• Often kisses shoulders when shirts provide access.

• Really enjoys being doted on, kiss his face gently all over and he melts. Play with his hair, trace imaginary patterns on his skin, massages.

• He's wrapped around your little finger, and often says so.

• Is actually really good at singing, refuses to admit it

• Thinks it's fun to annoy you, just a little bit, he knows when to cease and desist.

• Enjoys cooking, is surprisingly good at it!

• Hugs it out when you get frustrated with something

• Likes watching cooking shows and YouTube videos, purely because they are soothing

• Skateboards. Not everywhere, or all the time, but knows how and it's a hobby.

• A pretty good artist too. Mainly graffiti style stuff. Can't use graphite pencil for peanuts but is great with paint and spray paint.

• Doesn't know how washing machines work, just knows to put a liquid in and press a button. If anything else is accidentally pressed, he asks you or Plumeria for help.

• Is absolutely enthralled by watching you do your makeup

• Has 100% let you do his and been super into it

• Plumeria joined in, it was a lot of fun

• Golisopod is a big puppy and loves you almost as much as Guzma does

• Cheek kisses will always make him blush

• Doesn't like blueberries

• What do you mean there are different kinds of fruits other than apples, oranges, berries and bananas????

• Is a pro at pirating games and movies

• This lad is an absolute unit. 190cm tall, muscle thicc, big bones, big diCk

• PHAT ass

• If you spank his booty he will either laugh, turn around and attack you with tickles and kisses or try to get you back

• Wants nothing more than for you to see yourself as perfectly as he sees you

• Always offers to help with housework or straight up does it himself, likes taking care of you

• 👏Wants👏you👏to👏feel👏appreciated👏

• Buys you things that made him think of you

• Guys really weird, obscure mugs from thrift shops and dollar stores

• Always laughs at anything genital themed

• Uses "bruh" unironically

• Crazy supporter of BLM and LGBT+

• Plumeria is a lesbian and they are absolute bros what do you expect

• He will kiss every part of you that you find unattractive and tell you how wrong you are, if you do the same for him he might cry??

• Very sensitive nipples, use them in the bedroom for some entertaining reactions

• Open to but stuff, vibrators drive him sky high

• Will never, ever cheat. Fucking hates that shit, he's had his heart broken and he never wants to break yours.

• Faithful mans, theoretically married to you from day one

• Loves to make you laugh

• Sometimes just... stares at you... because of how beautiful you are. Or your ass or yiddies because he's a simple man.

• L o v e s ya yiddies

• Weed. Definitely uses weed.

• Will not hesitate to kick a parent for hitting their kid, 100% marches over and gives them a piece of his mind

• Knows how to steal cars flawlessly

• Knows a guy for just about everything

• Fancy underwear? He's speechless and honoured. After all he doesn't feel like he deserves nice things, but here you are, a nice thing dressed in nice things.

• Loves seeing you wear his clothes, especially if you're not wearing pants

• Likes video games a lot, gets unnecessarily competitive and rages on an Arin Hanson level, but is easily calmed down. Won't break things.

• Grabs his hair, runs his hands through his hair and pulls his hair when he feels a rangof emotions.

• Doesn't like seeing you in pain, will always do everything he can to help.

• Cake is godsent

• Will grab your butt often, loves it when you grab his

• Can and will win eating competitions

• Randomly goes for walks at night, will invite you along but if you wanna stay in he'll give you a big kiss and promise to be back soon. It's think time, sometimes snack-buying time.

• Wants you to eat. Constantly asks if you've been eating good. Needs to know you're healthy.

• Always comes to the doctors with you. Holds your hand and is always way more worried than you are.

• Really bad at putting furniture together, electronics however are a piece of cake.

• Always slouching. Knows he shouldn't.

• Is a great heat source in cold weather, warm but not too warm.

• Surprisingly soft skin, follows the same skincare routine as you do because you and Plumeria are the only way he learns this stuff.

[thenixkat]

[id: A three-panel sequence from the Pokemon manga featuring a conversation between Wicke, Faba, Moon, Professor Kukui, and Professor Burnet. Faba and Wicke are in the first two upper panels. Moon and the professors are in the last panel.

Wicke: It was most likely hurt by Team Skull, because, well...

Wicke: This year there have been 45 cases of them abusing pokemon...

Faba: Assistant branch chief Wicke, you mustn't jump to conclusions. There have been more cases than usual, though.

Moon: Is that true?

Faba: Yes. Twenty-nine cases of assault... eleven destructions of habitat... and 5 cases of being sold as food. But there may be more considering how some cases are ignored or left unreported. /end id]

Ok so say we take the listed crimes of manga Team Skull with a grain of salt since, the pokemon manga really likes to make things more violent to a degree that feels cartoonish to me. And we cross out the shit that we know they do b/c the Aether Foundation/Lusamine pays them to do in searching for 'what does anime Team Skull do to pay the bills'.

So we have to cross out habitat destruction and pokemon abuse b/c we know that the Aether Foundation pays Team Skull to fuck shit up and harm pokemon in a way that means that the Aether Foundation can confiscate and rehabilitate those pokemon.

Only crossing out the assault b/c the assault isn't tied to robbery. It's fairly reasonable to assume that Team Skull does some assaults. That they're ready and willing to start shit with people that piss them off for one reason or another. And I think it is especially reasonable to belive that Guzma beats the fuck out of people that piss him off outside of pokemon battles. He's a violent dude with a violent temper and we know he's willing to lay his actual hands on someone and especially hates when people give his crew a hard time.

(I don't think it'd be shit to the extent of what he does in the manga, like the manga version of Guzma doesn't seem to care about his grunts and is willing to be violent towards them when the other versions of the character don't come across that way. And also I'm not willing to belive a ref in any other iteration of the franchise outside of the manga would let him whole ass break his opponent's arm/having his pokemon attack the other trainer and let that slide over ending the fight and declaring him the loser)

Now the selling pokemon as food, and I have to assume its poaching and selling protected pokemon as food or illegally harvesting things from places that's its illegal to or selling a person's stolen pokemon as food, rather than just selling pokemon as food in general. B/c people do eat pokemon, there would be people raising, harvesting, or selling pokemon as food.

And poaching would be something they could profit off of and we do see the grunts illegally harvest pokemon in the anime. Not to any success but we do see it.

Another money-making thing we see Team Skull do in the manga that isn't related to the Aether Foundation is run food carts/sell food. (Which is neat b/c manga!Guzma seems to be able to cook and care about making good/quality food)

So of the things just on hand for potential possible ways anime Team Skull are financially supporting themselves we have: battling (off-screen from Plumeria and Guzma), running food carts/selling food, poaching, and illegally selling pokemon as food.

[zz-chikorita]

Plumeria is on a mission to make Guzma look as stylish as possible, yet also look as different from his usual look as possible. What does she make him wear?

Plumeria knows how much Guzma hates wearing any kind of suit or business attire, so she decides she's going to make his look so fuckin' fly, he'll have to like it. So the aesthetic she's going for is a kind of a GQ meets modern gangster meets business casual (if the "business" is kicking ass and taking names but being all out of names) kind of thing.

So she's thinkin' a royal purple, loose, silk button up, the top third of it undone (she knows how much he just can't stand ties and shit at his throat like that).

A pinstripe jacket over that, left open. At first glance the jacket seems black, but when the light hits it right, you'll realize it's like a super deep purple. The pinstripes themselves are gold. You'd think it'd look gaudy but it's actually quite subtle.

Got some matching slacks to go with it. They're a pegged cut so that they will fit into the shoes instead of falling over top of them. Speaking of which...

For his shoes, she gets him a pair of all white, high top basketball sneakers. Around the sole of the foot, they have purple LEDs.

Now you might be asking things like... Where the hell'd she get all this? How the hell was she able to afford it? And I'm here to tell you: Why ya gotta ask so many damn questions? Mind ya own gotdamn business!

Please keep in mind that Guzma is bitching and moaning literally the entire time. It took some convincing, but he finally agreed to let her do his hair. She parted it off center and slicked it back. Not straight back, but sort of down and back, leaving just a small section of his bangs on the larger side of the part loose.

Of course, before she lets him look in the mirror, she gives him his shades back cuz she knows he's always gotta have his damn shades no matter what.

The Guz man be shooketh when she finally gives him the mirror. He's, like, genuinely impressed and can't stop posing and looking at himself. Mostly he keeps going on and on about how, damn, ya boy sharp af, y'all better stand back or ya gonna get cut! Men and ladies please, start formin' an orderly line, there's plenty for everyone, just gotta wait your turn! Yo! Wise guy! You talkin' to me? I said is you talkin' to me???? Etc, etc, etc...

In the end, Guzma concedes and admits that he, in fact, does not hate it.

Success!

[reverse-moon]

Okay so I posted the art before (oh fucking well) but now I have ✨ideas✨. [ OG post found here. ]

╔══════════════════════╗

N (B/W, B2/W2) - Patton

Sweetheart man

Grew up around Pokémon before Ghesis took him in, so he literally can understand Pokémon. Just not how people think he can

Doesn't wanna be Plasma King

Black(Hilbert)/White(Hilda) needs to understand he's being used >:(

He actually doesn't "own" a Pokémon team, they just kinda help him willingly. The Pokéballs are a formality they endure

Just wants peace

Lowkey hates Ghesis with every fiber of his being

He knows his stuff

He acts dumb bc Ghesis doesn't think he know shit

100% punched Ghesis after B/W was over

Black(Hilbert)/White(Hilda) was the surprised Pikachu meme at that

Nate/Rosa are good friends with him later :3

╚══════════════════════╝

╔══════════════════════╗

Guzma (S/M, US/UM) - Remus

Yeah, he's an "evil team" leader

But its not exactly called Team Skull

It's call Team Ceph

But otherwise he's literally just Guzma and the team is literally just Team Skull

"Losers" trying to prove their worth

He's actually a super good trainer too

But his little brother is supposedly better so he did this.

He's really chill with Sun/Elio/Moon/Selene tbh

Yeah, they're brats, but their his friends so fuck off >:(

Kikui isn't too bad either.

He custom made platform sneakers, he's fancy like that.

╚══════════════════════╝

╔══════════════════════╗

Cynthia (D/P/P, BD/SP) - Logan

Research!

He's v powerful

He's also really into the history of Sinnoh

Despite his efforts, he's literally very recognizable (thank you, Fantia /sar)

He just wants to be in the library tbh

Dawn/Lucas giving him the chance to meet Palkia/Dialga/Giratina really made him happy (he'd never say it more than once tho)

He loves his Garchomp (she's his bby)

Also really into writing

Dawn/Lucas beat him, he spent literally all day in the next day reading and writing.

His grandmama is glad to have him help with her history and science and all that

He's actually really shy too, he just learned how to interact bc Champion.

Let him be-

╚══════════════════════╝

╔══════════════════════╗

Zinnia (ORAS) - Janus

Lorekeeper of the Draconid people

They hate his ass

All because he's got burns and heterochromia :(

He's actually really nice

He was besties with the old Lorekeeper

He acts mean to Ruby/Sapphire and May/Brendon, but honestly he's so done with shit

He doesn't want to be a bad guy.

But he will be bc that the only way he can get shit done

This isn't a Comic Zinnia parallel either, this is game Zinnia he's like

He also learns p quick that Ruby/Sapphire is probably gonna be a good candidate to save the world

So at the top of the Sky pillar

Summons Rayquaza

And is like "Save the world I've done my part peace!"

He's currently just wandering the world

Probably has met Logan, Patton, Remus, Virgil and Roman at one point

Not that he stayed long with any of them

╚══════════════════════╝

╔══════════════════════╗

Gold/Ethan (G/S/C, HG/SS) - Roman

Nothing much changed

What did you expect? This a Protag role!! They're empty slates for a reason

Remus is his older brother tho

He low-key looks up to Remus actually

Big of heart, dumb of ass. Might become a himbo one day

Became Johto Champ

Wants to be the "greatest trainer"

Doesn't know what that means, but he wants it!

He's really sweet

╚══════════════════════╝

╔══════════════════════╗

Red (R/G/B/Y, FR/LG) - Virgil

He's a selective mute

Really loves his Pikachu

Will get violent (his Charizard actually held him back from Giovanni once)

So done with humanity

Became Kanto champ, then left bc "I'm not dealing with this, Green-"

Some people call him Purple bc he just never told them his name

He really doesn't care about that tho

"Purple the silent champ" sounds dope to him

Mount Silver actually doesn't fucking phase him with how cold it is

He kept his bedroom really fucking cold (59°F/15°C)

Also it gives him an excuse to eat warm calming food more often :D

Roman challenged him once and lost

And now he can't escape the trainer

Got dragged to Alola by Blue once

It wasn't bad

Too sunny and hot tho

Sun/Elio/Moon/Selene was nice to meet

Met Remus and talked about Roman and stuff

It was nice

"It's too hot, Blue." ❝That's because you're wearing black and very dark purple, dumbass.❞ ← Actually conversation between Virgil and Blue in Alola

Didn't changed to lighter colors though. He suffered for his theme

╚══════════════════════╝

And there you have it.

If I make Sleep, Emile, Thomas and Nico, it's gonna be way fucking later and I have no clue who I'd replace with them. Emile would probably be a Pokemon Professor (maybe Sycamore) and I feel like Nico would be a fun replacement for the artsy Alola trial cap, but idk.

Have fun with this and just credit/tag me should you do something with this shit.

:)

Also here, have the songs I got the idea from:

N's Theme (From "Pokémon Black/White")

Vs. Guzma (From "Pokémon Sun/Moon")

Vs. Cynthia (From "Pokémon Platinum")

Vs. Zinnia (From "Pokémon Omega Ruby/Alpha Sapphire")

Dragon's Den/Vs. Trainer Red (From "Pokémon Gold/Silver")

Pokémon Musical Bytes - Complete Package

[facetsofthecloset]

@mariegoos here are the Pokemon blorbos

(with the caveat that I have only ever played Heartgold, half of Alpha Sapphire, Moon, and Pokemon Go, with a handful of anime episodes sprinkled in, so my knowledge of characters is limited lol)

Send me a fandom and I’ll tell you my: blorbo (favorite character, character I think about the most):

you're right it's Guzma 😂 i had a moment when i considered "well, what about-" but then i realized i've spent the last-*counts on fingers*-9 months writing about him just about daily so. >_>

but the Team Rocket Trio also fits as a Collective Blorbo i think. they're the characters i'd most likely say "look! it's the collective blorbo from my shows!" out loud about lol

scrunkly (my “baby”, character that gives me cuteness aggression, character that is So Shaped):

probably Acerola, she's an adorable baby ghost girl and if anyone tried to hurt her i'd chomp their bones like a feral dog

this also applies to Lillie and Hau

scrimblo bimblo (underrated/underappreciated fave):

Professor Burnet maybe? i don't have a good sense of who's actually underappreciated because i don't spend that much time in fandom spaces lol

but she's very cool and i love her

glup shitto (obscure fave, character that can appear in the background for 0.2 seconds and I won’t shut up about it for a week):

if we're going REALLY obscure then i'd say Agrata from the Sun & Moon Battle Tree. she's a punk girl opponent and literally has like 4 lines of dialogue total including win/loss riders but she seems cool and i'm always happy to run into her 😂

also all of the Team Skull grunts and the Team GO Rocket grunts if we're being honest. i want to take them out for coffee and be friends

poor little meow meow (“problematic”/unpopular/controversial/otherwise pathetic fave):

i was going to put Nanu in the scrimblo bimblo category but realized that he's a sad cat man who's also a cop, obvs he's a poor little meow meow how could i ever have doubted it

i'd also like to mention Grimsely at this point because i only know him from, like, one battle in Moon but he's a sexy tired goth. his original design is a casino den twink so like, either way you win

horse plinko (character I would torment for fun, for whatever reason):

Faba. that man just. i dunno man his vibes make me want to plague his life with incidental music and like. steal his big ol' green goggle glasses and leave them in increasingly bizarre places. they severely amplified his creep vibes in the anime and i hate him. but he fascinates me

eeby deeby (character I would send to superhell):

Lusamine, i guess? i don't remember anyone else annoying me to the

actually wait, anyone in the Battle Tree with either a Dusknoir or an Araquanid, with those specific move sets that mean i WILL eventually win, but i literally can't do damage to them due to my own team composition (fighting type-heavy)/they keep using Double Team so i can't hit them

so i have to wait for them to start using Struggle and hurt themselves

HALF AN HOUR LATER

when i was obsessively playing BT to try and scout Guzma i ran into them A LOT

(Guzma i have suffered for you you punk-ass bitch)

[tunasama13]

OKAY OKAY I GOT BACK INTO PLAYING MY OLD POKEMON GAMES, and *sighhhhh* holy fuCK-

Pokemon White:

- N MY BABY BOY WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE YOU AAAAAAAAA

- Bianca is a mood

- That. Fucking. Ranger. With the. Overpowered. Marcactus.

- I got into the game, tried to get my old team back together only to find that besides my starter, EVERYONE WAS UNDERLEVELED AS FUCK

- Did I mention how much I want to punt Ghetsis into the Distortion World? Giratina needs some dinner.

- (Not me headcanon N to be a half Zoroark AND biologically related to Lusamine, Lillie, and Gladion from his bio mothers side)

- NOT ME GETTING WAR FLASHBACKS IN VICTORY ROAD

- Elesa my QUEEN.

- I mayyyyy or may not ship Cheren and Bianca?

- Alder is N’s adopted dad now, FUCKING BATTLE ME.

- My game card was all fucked up because of my shitty DSi with an eternally dusty cartridge and me trying to scratch out the nonexistent dirt.

- Okay okay, TELL ME HOW I NOTICED THIS. Ghetsis= Lusamine/ N=Lillie/ The Sages= Faba x7/ Anthea and Concordia= Wicke(?) (sorry Gladion my baby 🥺)

- I will keep making connections to Team Plasma and the Aether Foundation until the day I die.

- ALSOOOO, the Juniper’s father-daughter relationship is wholesome as fuck.

- N has a boyfriend and a girlfriend, their names are Piers and Flannery (DON’T WORRY SHE’S 19 IN MY HC, also, she’s never given a specific age, and she looks slightly over 18?)

- I laugh everytime I defeat a Team Plasma grunt

Pokemon Ultra Moon:

- LILLIE I LOVE YOU SO MUCH YOU INNOCENT LIL BEAN

- GLADION, MY EMO BABY BOYYYYYY

- Lana is adorable, BUT I HAVE TO TRADE A FUCKING EMOLGA TO MYSELF TO DEFEAT THAT DAMN TOTEM ARAQUANID.

- Lusamine is Ghetsis but she’s attractive and actually gets redempted, I STILL HATED HER FOR THE FIRST PART OF THE GAME THOUGH.

- Speaking of Lusamine, Lillie, and Gladion. I will die with my headcanon that they’re N’s biological aunt/cousins.

- Hau, YOU ANNOYING RAY OF SUNSHINE.

- Kukui and Burnet’s relationship is sooooo sweet 🥺 IF YOU TEAR THEM APART I WILL BEAT YOUR ASS

- I love how Kukui found Lillie washed up on the beach and went, “HONEY GET THE ADOPTION PAPERS”

- Nebby is baby, I would willingly adopt the scared cloud baby.

- I don’t know why, but that flying type Elite Four member pisses me off. WHATWASHERNAME???

- Guzma is a traumatized stinky gremlin, and I love that traumatized stinky gremlin.

- FABA CAN FUCKING FALL IN A DITCH AND DIE

- Ghetsis you asshole, HIT LILLIE AGAIN AND NEBBY WILL RIP YOU APART.

- Also, uhhhhhh, Ghetsis just threatened to murder his “sons” cousin.

- Wicke? More like, THICKE

- Oh yeah, my dumbass made my Pokemon player character Lillie and Gladion’s younger sister, SUCH A DUMBASS I AM.

- Nanu, Acerola. Stop giving me Killian and NBB vibes. ( @usernose )

- ALRIGHT N AND LILLIE SIMILARITIES. THREE TWO ONE GO!

1. They have mentally abusive fuckwad parents (except Lusamine got redeemed)

2. Lillie has Solgaleo/Lunala, N has Reshiram/Zekrom

3. They leave at the end of the game (in Sun and Moon and Black and White) WITH EMOTIONAL ASS PIANO THEMES

4. Obviously show signs of being abused (I’ve seen theories with N having bipolar disorder/Multiple Personality Disorder, and Lillie just has straight up PTSD in the manga.)

- Of course, in my HC, N is Lillie’s cousin, soooo...

- THE ULTRA WORMHOLE IS SOOOOOO FUN

- I have PTSD from that fucking Totem Araquanid constantly murdering my team

- Wh- Colress. WHAT.

- I felt so bad for Popplio 🥺

- The fucking contrast between the girl preschoolers and the boy preschoolers. The boys start bawling and throw temper tantrums and the girls are like, “YAY I LOST! :D”

- Gladion is baby boy, emo baby boy, protecc him.

- Illima gives me weird Aoyama vibes, and that’s okay.