#also got two volumes of a bl

[nyxypoo]

guess whose at the library again...

[live-laugh-obsess]

i will not be able to share my 2025 storygraph stats with anyone it’s genuinely too embarrassing already for me

[paintingpuff]

I'm late to the aro positivity party but thought I could shout out a manga I read this year, I Want to be a Wall!

It's about an aroace woman (who is really into BL) and a gay man being arranged into a marriage and how they navigate that, growing closer and kind of becoming a QPR.

The stuff that really got to me was the discussion of the woman's experience with her asexuality (and aromanticism though that isn't explicitly labeled), how it connects to her media tastes and the way people have hurt her in the past. It was all absolutely heartbreaking.

A fun detail I also like is how the pair act out romantic tropes (Gift of Magi style misunderstanding, paranoia about "cheating,"), but they are all done through a platonic context.

(Ex. Even though they're not in romantic love, he still feels upset at the idea of losing their bond, or her getting hurt by someone he doesn't know.)

There's not too many chapters of it out, unfortunately (only like two volumes), but the ones I read are very enjoyable and I'd love to put this on other people's radar!

(btw, I got this manga rec from this video, and there's more in it!)

Asexual Manga and their Powerful Visibility

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=urXrwYmMdgA

[thirstkanaphan]

A Shipper's Perspective on SanSang

The San/Yeosang relationship receives positive and negative attention from the fandom. The majority of us find their bond really sweet! We coo when San clings to Yeosang and declares his love; we chuckle when Yeosang nods his head in shy acceptance.

On the extreme ends of the fandom spectrum, you encounter discourse that generally falls into two camps:

Yeosang is a hostage to San's overly-demonstrative affections

Yeosang is a homewrecker who broke up WooSan

These arguments are not new, but they increased in volume within the last year or two. I felt compelled to explore these arguments and put into words some of my complicated thoughts and feelings about this particular relationship. I also believe I'm in a unique position to comment on these arguments because...

I am a shipper. I've been in fandom spaces since I was a preteen (nearly 20 years!) and I am primarily drawn to a fandom when there is great potential for shipping. I was in the Hockey RPF fandom from 2012-2015 and wrote/consumed stories where NHL players kissed each other and sometimes got each other pregnant. These are my bona fides.

Everyone in the Hockey RPF fandom knew the rules. Don't break the fourth wall. Don't make it weird. Don't get delulu. We all understood that Sidney Crosby and Evgeni Malkin were not secretly lovers pretending to be good friends and teammates (👀). We were there to have a good time and, more importantly, we all enjoyed hockey! I seriously got into hockey through fandom and attended many games. I still feel a huge swell of fondness when I catch the Pittsburgh Penguins on TV. THOSE ARE MY BOYS!

Before I found Ateez and joined this fandom, I was heavily into the BL genre and specifically Thai BL. The thing about Thai BL is that many of the most popular shows have nothing to do with their writing or directing or acting; they are popular because they star a "branded pair" of good-looking young men who perform fan service outside of their shows. While there are actual queer actors in the Thai BL genre, very few have the same level of global popularity as branded pairs.

ZeeNuNew, the hottest branded pair of the moment

Branded pairs are deliberately modeled on the kpop idol industry, which similarly encourages its young female audience to project m/m fantasies onto their faves. There's actually a whole Korean BL called Bump Up Business about two struggling idols (OnelyOneOf's Mill and Nine) who are paired together in a new group with instructions to appeal to fans through BGP: Business Gay Performance.

The key to a successful branded pair is to emulate as closely as possible m/m archetypes rooted in early '00s Japanese yaoi, which is the primogenitor for modern BL and remains a dominant influence in kpop fan-service.

Here are the main archetypes, as defined by the expert on the subject, AbsoluteBL:

seme: the active pursuer in the narrative (from the original attacker meaning of the word)

uke: the passive resistor in the narrative (defender)

AbsoluteBL clarifies: seme/uke is about who is in CONTROL of the relationship's story, as opposed to top/bottom, terms which come from the gay/queer community and pertain to sexual preference and (should) have nothing to do with narrative power dynamics.

Traditionally, the seme is physically larger and conventionally more masculine in appearance, while the uke is smaller and more feminine in appearance. The uke is often considered "pure" (yes, I know, problematic), which makes them all the more desirable. Female consumers project themselves onto the uke to enjoy a romantic fantasy without having to fully engage with the patriarchal bullshit baked into traditional m/f romance (AbsoluteBL calls this "heterosexual dysmorphia").

Do you see where I'm going with this?

Out of all the pairs in Ateez, SanSang are the most seme/uke-coded.

San is the pursuer. He wants to protect Yeosang because Yeosang is "cute" and "pure." San uses his size to put Yeosang into physical situations he must tolerate/endure for San's pleasure. San preens whenever Yeosang acknowledges him, compliments him, or initiates contact. San wants to take Yeosang to "Paradise" (Single's Inferno) and feed him steak in bed. Only San can kiss Yeosang, which he repeatedly tells atiny. We cannot have Yeosang, he belongs to San.

On paper (or on tumblr), this description would make anyone raise an eyebrow. For the anti-fans of this relationship, San is a bully who routinely takes advantage of Yeosang's gentle nature. I've even heard an argument that San's physical transformation prompted KQ to "reassign" him Yeosang as a fan-service partner in order to maximize their seme/uke appeal to fans. As evidence, fans point to Yeosang's tendency to flinch whenever San gets too close and his hesitancy to reciprocate when San boldly declares his love in front of the cameras.

I have a few responses to this characterization of their relationship.

Quick note: fan service is a feature, not a bug, of kpop. The HYBE internal docs that leaked last summer explicitly mentioned different ships among various Big4 groups and cited strategies for promoting certain ships among their own groups.

Ateez excels at fan service, and this is partially to do with their natural chemistry with and genuine affection for each other. But also, as a smaller company, KQ did not have the means or resources to provide media-training to Ateez in their early years AND they gave almost unfettered access to the members via the vlive app, which is how many kpop fans got to know smaller and newer groups.

The sale of vlive to HYBE, who proceeded to shut down the app and replace it with their own company-managed app, terminated that kind of easy and unrestricted access to idols.

From what I gather, Ateez's growing popularity can be attributed in part to how much the members charmed fans by being unscripted and candid in their live videos, often about their relationships with each other. Sometimes we saw too much, i.e., the Woo-San-Sang intervention during their Christmas live.

I think fans got used to a certain kind of fan service from Ateez, a kind of fan service that seemed to tease fans with a genuine "what if?" about their relationships. This was helped by the built-in narratives surrounding the members: Yunho and Mingi meeting in ninth grade; Wooyoung and Yeosang being trainees together; Seonghwa being inspired by Hongjoong to pursue his idol dream.

And of course, WooSan, but I'll get to them later.

Going to back to SanSang: if you watch their early content, you'll see that San was drawn to Yeosang and the feeling was reciprocated. You can find multiple examples of them cuddling, hugging, and being affectionate with each other going back to 2019. It's been going on since San's "twink" era!

However, while fan service comes naturally to San, it is not the same for Yeosang. In fact, while he excels at all other aspects of being an idol (such as vocals, performance, dance, visuals) he arguably lacks the instincts for fan service. He is different from someone like Jongho, who abstains from fan service unless he's in the mood, or Hongjoong, whose tsundere persona (another Japanese romance archetype) is part of the Matz appeal.

My fellow ateez meta writers have offered their thoughts about Yeosang and how he often suffers for lack of "killer instincts" within the group (they clearly adore each other, but they also fight each other for our love and attention). What is the cause of Yeosang's passivity? Is it lingering trauma from his trainee years? Is it his general tendency to be forgetful or oblivious about events happening around him? Yes, Yeosang is smart, clever, and has a dry sense of humor, but he's also the child that Hongjoong said was hardest to parent.

Then there's a Yeosang that we almost never see and we once glimpsed in a cute exchange between him and Mingi. It's implied that Mingi and Yeosang forgot they were being filmed and Yeosang spoke differently than he normally does on camera, which San observes in surprise. I am not a Korean speaker, but he sounds extra sweet and soft. If that's how he is at home, no wonder he inspires so much cuteness aggression in the members.

I'll also note that Yeosang's "flinch" response to fan service is similar no matter who handles him, whether it's Mingi, Wooyoung, or Jongho. Yet, San is his most persistent suitor and his actions draw the most attention, positive and negative.

Let's Talk About San

San's shiftable personality is something the members observed in an early vlive with Hongjoong, Mingi, Seonghwa, and Yunho.

Mingi: "which member has the most behavioral gap with and without a camera?"

Hongjoong suggests that Yeosang and Seonghwa are pretty much the same with or without a camera. But San behaves differently.

Hongjoong: "Seriously. In the absence of a camera...how should I put this...I'm having trouble putting it in a nice way...he has a pretty extreme character...his mood changes a lot...whenever we all gather for a conversation, he's like...it's fascinating! How does someone think like that? He acts like a normal person with a camera...he's very abnormal with us."

While Hongjoong is talking, the other three see San approaching and they all visibly get nervous.

San: "I heard you dissing me!"

I recap this live because I think it strengthens my interpretation of the SanSang relationship as informed more by San's personality than company mandates. I think San's extreme personality and his ability to shift into "character" in front of the camera enables him to similarly adapt to certain dynamics. He is very perceptive about what his members need out of fan service with him. He's Yunho's sweet boy; he's Seonghwa's pesky little brother; he's Jongho's favorite hyung; he's Mingi's goofball bro. We'll get to Wooyoung.

Thus, one theory is that San becomes the "seme" for Yeosang because he recognizes a need in Yeosang that isn't being met.

Let's revisit the 2024 Off The Record interview between San and Yeosang:

San: There's something I want to ask you. Did anything I did upset you?

Yeosang: Actually, for me, instead of being upset, I feel more like I owe you an apology. Because for example, when you say things like "I love you", you show your love and affection, for me it's not easy to reciprocate, so I feel like I owe you an apology. Sometimes, when you try to kiss me... how can I say it... my body's reaction to avoid it is automatic.

And when San replies that Yeosang has done nothing to upset him, Yeosang continues, unprompted:

Yeosang: Nothing upsets you... Thinking about it another way, this feeling of being upset, I don't think it's entirely negative. I feel like the closer the person is, It's easier to get upset about something. I often wonder if I'm not doing enough (also about taking care of San). It's a bit of a stretch to say something like "I'm going to do something to upset you," but I'm going to do my best to do it.

Let's go back a year earlier to Yeosang's message to San during San's 2023 birthday live:

Sometimes when san shows affection to me, I...hahah...because i’m a little shy, yes...so i really, i really like, i brush it away/discard it but still...to me who cannot express (affection well), Sanie approaching me like this first is (something) i’m always grateful for, and because i feel like i won’t ever be able to express that gratefulness well, so i’m sorry too, but still, i am always thinking very thankfully to Sanie who approaches me first like this.

After listening to this, San smiles softly and says, "You're mine."

I think a more cynical person could read these exchanges as Yeosang apologizing for not giving back enough to their fan service, but I think Yeosang is really saying that he wants to be an active participant in his relationship with San. He wants to be able to genuinely upset San, which he sees as a marker of close friendship. While there is still a part of him that remains uneasy with San's excessive physical affection, he wants to be more to San than just a pretty doll to play with. (Interestingly, this is how Jongho described his relationship with Wooyoung earlier in the ep: “am I an accessory to you?”) I don't think for one second that San feels anything less for Yeosang than intense care and adoration.

Given all of this, SanSang "should" work as a major ship!!

Fans should be falling all over themselves to romanticize the gentle, dominant seme coaxing the timid, traumatized uke into accepting his care and affection!

Yet instead, many in the fandom have a hard time accepting or appreciating the fan-service SanSang provide. It comes off as particularly inauthentic for them. Almost too much like a manhwa/yaoi manga.

The primary reason? WooSan.

Many folks have already written about the WooSan ship and why they find it so exciting and compelling. A lot of the reasons boil down to this: it could actually be real.

My non-shipper kpop friend, who listens to everything but doesn't participate in the fandom, told me at their concert that there was a time when she genuinely thought WooSan were in love.

The image above sums up fandom's perception of WooSan: Wooyoung leads, San follows. Wooyoung pushes, teases, pressures, initiates, while San watches him with the fondest look in his eyes. Wooyoung demands, San gives: his attention, his praise, his own flesh. For narrative purposes, Wooyoung is the seme, San is the uke.

This is an exciting dynamic for shippers, refreshing for its lack of traditional yaoi archetypes. Big, strong San getting pushed around by bratty Wooyoung and loving it. San wrote tragic fanfiction for their characters in Bouncy. San is so confident in Wooyoung's love for him that he jokes Wooyoung will "always come back" even if he strays to another members. San is Wooyoung's home.

The biggest Yeosang antis claim that SanSang is an insult to WooSan. They claim San only acts like he's close to Yeosang because the company separated WooSan after they got too close for comfort during Bouncy era. Fans point to fewer WooSan appearances and promotional activities; no more shippy moments during the logbooks; they rarely filmed tiktoks or tagged each other in instagram photos; there was less "soulmate" talk on lives and during interviews. To add insult to injury, they didn't even get a unit song: It's You is a three-man performance with Yeosang.

Another theory shared by a not-insignificant faction within the fandom is that Wooyoung would not permit himself to be put into the role of the passive, submissive uke, so KQ made the call that San should be more attentive to Yeosang.

I am sure there are multiple factors for why WooSan distanced themselves/were distanced after Bouncy-era (cue Oprah voice "were you silent? or were you silenced?"), and I do think some of that has to do with the meteoric rise of Ateez after Bouncy. I think all of them were savvy enough to realize that they could promote the group on more than just being yaoiteez, and San's skyrocketing fame contributed to that shift too, along with Wooyoung's own self-described internal character arc away from being the "sexy" member towards someone with more mystery and maturity.

I would argue that their "distance" had the result of redirecting our attention to how affectionate San already was with all the members. Suddenly we're noticing how clingy he is with Yunho, Seonghwa, and Jongho. Same goes for Yeosang. Their dynamics are nothing new, but I would argue the fandom's attention and scrutiny made it seem new.

While this cannot be an accurate measurement of anything really, compare how many fics are written about each pair:

San/Wooyoung: 7,525 works on Archive Of Our Own

San/Yeosang: 1,345 works on Archive Of Our Own

As a shipper, there are really interesting observations to make about why the SanSang ship does not work compared to the WooSan ship.

My main theory takes us back to those classic seme/uke dynamics that the SanSang dynamic reproduces through their fan service. When compared with WooSan, SanSang comes off as inauthentic because it's too obvious, too easy, too much like shipper bait. It's traditional yaoi-coded appeal is actually the turn-off!

Here's my other theory: many are uncomfortable with SanSang because it forces them to reckon with the very real Business Gay Performance scaffolding all idol fan service. Because if SanSang is obviously manufactured for attention, are other unit pairs the same?

A Final Few Words About Yeosang

Yeosang is the unfair recipient of a lot of hate by the fandom, for shipping and non-shipping reasons. It's awful and it needs to stop.

I also see a worrying trend among his staunchest defenders of infantilizing Yeosang, stripping him of agency in their battles on his behalf, whether it's for better line distribution, more solo promotions, and fashion week schedules. There was even talk of organizing protest trucks outside of KQ, which I personally find mortifying.

I sincerely hope that in the future Yeosang has more opportunities to shine as a singer, dancer, and performer. I also hope that he comes to a place of comfort and confidence in his abilities to give and receive affection from the people who love him the most, a struggle he's voiced publicly. I truly wish him the best!

A Final Few Words About Me!

As someone who was introduced to Ateez via shipping my initial understanding of these relationships was refracted through the lens of the fandom. It's rare for me to move from "fanon" to "canon" like I am with Ateez, where I'm catching up on all their content, vlogs, and interviews and trying to understand them as "real" people, to the extent that anyone can ever know an idol. I am now streaming and voting in addition to reading fic! I'm no longer lurking but actively participating as a fan! This is a whole new phase for me in my 15+ years of being in fandom.

The interesting thing about my journey is that while I entered the fandom through the side door, I've actually become more interested in their IRL relationships and dynamics. I still read fic of course, but like my Hockey RPF fandom days I am able to compartmentalize the part of my brain that goes "oh these pretty boys are in love and should kiss!" and the other part that goes "these enormously talented artists deserve my support and attention."

That being said, I still enjoy shipping and I enjoying talking about how RPF ships work in the context of the idol industry. SanSang is a great case study to think about these topics, and I hope others will respond and with their own meta.

Thank you for your time!

[negrowhat]

It's not just the volume or the enthusiasm of the sounds - though top marks in both - it's the variety of sounds that come forth from BossNoeul. Some BLs we're lucky to get anything audible (esp from the tops). But we aren't just getting general moaning with these two. We've got overwhelmed sighs, we've got point of entry inhales, we've got shuttering climaxes. Cheers boys, kudos on the commitment to authentically representing intimacy.

*Said with humor but sincerity. I do actually think it's lovely how they view these scenes are a reflection of love and intimacy and want to reflect that.

Anon I think BossNoeul being so vocal during their love scenes is really what keeps me coming back. They really put a lot of effort into making their intimate scenes feel real. Boss is going to be in my Top 10 as long as he makes his characters moan because we NEVER get loud tops...LIKE EVER! The most we'll get is panting and like idk 'OH' faces but to make his characters MOANERS????????????? 10/10!

Also the way I have completely come around to CirPhu's final love scene because of all the levels of moaning we get from Noeul????? He really made that scene for me...also something about Boss's silhouette in that dark hallway really pleases me.

Like BossNoeul are spectacular at their physical chemistry, but to throw on moaning???? They're a treat for the eyes and ears. Their loves scenes truly show how in sync they are as partners and how they know exactly how to perform.

And I wanted to point out that sometimes those boys get so into it that they have to be told to stop by the staff.

[duckprintspress]

National Library Week Shout-Outs!

I LOVE libraries – and this week, April 6 to 12, is National Library Week, so I’m here to shout-out my favorite libraries.

US-Nation-Wide Libraries: these are libraries that are available, via Libby, to anyone in the United States!

Queer Liberation Library: “Queer Liberation Library (QLL) is fighting to build a vibrant, flourishing queer future by connecting LGBTQ+ people with literature, information, and resources that celebrate the unique and empowering diversity of our community.” I love QLL, it’s so great and filling such a huge need. They’re one of the handful of organizations that Duck Prints Press donates to monthly.

The Japan Foundation Los Angeles Library: “The Japan Foundation, Los Angeles (JFLA) promotes international awareness and mutual understanding between Japan and the U.S. through cultural exchange. We administer a wide range of programs and grants aimed at introducing Japanese arts and culture, supporting Japanese Studies and language education, and promoting publications, translations related to Japan.” Fantastic if you’re studying Japanese or love Japanese culture. They have toooons of manga.

If anyone knows more nation-wide Libby libraries, please do tell, I’d love to find, join, and support more!

New York State Libraries: I live in New York, so the rest of my faves are local. I’m lucky to live in a state where many libraries allow all state residents access at no cost.

Schenectady County Public Library: My local library system! Also accessible to people throughout the Capital Region (Montgomery, Fulton, Schoharie, Hamilton, Saratoga, Warren, Washington, Albany, and Rensselaer counties). I’m there multiple times a month, getting books for myself or my kids. All those queer YA graphic novels y’all see me reading in my weekly and monthly round-ups? Borrowed from the SCPL.

New York Public Library: I grew up going to my local branch of the NYPL in New York City. Now, I’m still able to access their collections, as can anyone who lives in New York State. They have a huge, amazing collection, and it’s absolutely worth the effort of getting a card if you’re able.

Brooklyn Public Library: I have been so so so impressed by their selection of queer books and graphic novels since I got a card for their Libby. The size of their collection is comparable to NYPL, and they’re also free throughout the state. Absolutely worth it. They also have very high loan and hold limits, and as a result of that and their huge collection of queer manga, they have become my most-used Libby library.

Buffalo and Erie County Public Library: My newest library! I haven’t gotten to use them much yet, but they have an interesting and varied collection that I’m looking forward to digging into once I get through some of the copious number of BL manga volumes I borrowed from BPL.

Other…

The Lilly Library: I have to shout out the Lilly, a rare book library at Indiana University at Bloomington. I studied library science at IU, and earned my MLS, and I took multiple classes at the Lilly and interned and worked at their conservation lab during my two years there. The professor who taught those classes now runs the library, so even though I haven’t been there for a long long time, I’m absolutely positive it’s still a wonderful place totally worth a visit if you get the chance. They’ll bring out any of their huge, varied collection that you ask to see, and they do regular exhibits of rare books from the collection.

What are your favorite libraries? Please do tell!

consider yourself tagged! reblog and tell me your favorite libraries, and I'll share those too!

[swallowerofdharma]

So let’s talk about… (h)ornithology…

Saezuru tori wa habatakanai (English title: Twittering Birds Never Fly) by Kou Yoneda is an ongoing manga, published in ihr HertZ magazine and currently available in nine volumes. Publication began in 2011.

Shangri-La no Tori (English title: Birds of Shangri-La) by Ranmaru Zariya is an ongoing manga, published in Canna magazine and currently available in three volumes. Publication began in 2017.

I recently had a interesting conversation about possible similarities and differences between these two titles and I thought that it could be interesting to write down some thoughts. I also caught up with Shangri-La, since I had read it in the past when the third volume wasn’t available - well I reread it entirely because, like many other bl manga I got recommended, this one didn’t hold my attention or capture my interest in the way Saezuru did and I didn’t remember most of it. I want to underline that this is my personal experience and a matter of preferences, that I am sharing my personal opinion and I am not trying to make a comparison in terms of good manga vs bad manga. I want to talk about my reasoning and observations, and I’ll attempt to illustrate my points so that it is hopefully clear the terms of the comparison I am making.

I won’t deny that in writing this post I will reiterate previous comments I made about Saezuru as a bl manga that seems to me quite exceptional and therefore much more interesting because of its realistic approach to the world and characters being portrayed. And because from a very superficial perspective, Shangri-La and Saezuru seem to treat very similar themes and dynamics, it is useful to pick up where and how they differ. This post doesn’t want to say anything about reading for entertainment or escapism, rather it’s more about understanding how you write a story in a manga format and how that relates to how the story works overall. So if you’re bored with this topic, you can skip this one.

I don’t have direct knowledge of the composition of the magazines these two manga are published in, but I can say that they are more on the explicit side of bl manga (erotica). Which means that they cater to a readership that expects to see explicit sexual scenes as soon as possible, mostly don’t want or expect female nudity, and will stay with the story if they are enamored with the characters and engaged in the anticipation of a sentimental outcome and emotional growth between a couple that is usually at the center of the narrative. To come up with a premise that is immediately satisfying is a hard task. In Saezuru, we have the exploitation of an already established couple from another short story: Kageyama and Kuga for sex to be teased in the very first pages, and maintaining a level of “spice” by exploiting the main character Yashiro’s hyper sexuality as a prominent part of his characterization. Shangri-La makes the whole setting works in favor of that immediate explicit action: a brothel in a non-specified island, one of the two main characters being a sex worker. Yashiro and Phi are the first to be introduced as the most pro-active and easy-going in terms of sexual freedom; Doumeki and Apollo are introduced next, in the first chapter as well, and they both don’t express sexual desire representing instead a restraining, reassuring force: one is a “straight” employee, the other has been impotent for some time.

But let’s talk about how these two scenarios differ, because they have less things in common than they are alike, once you pay attention to few details. We meet Yashiro in a pretty nondescript office, we don’t get a first name, and the family name Yashiro is not rare; as we get introduced to other characters, Doumeki is the only name that stands out a little, but they are all Japanese family names. Whereas a Phi or an Apollo are already exotic names that fit the distinctive characteristics of the rather fantastical environment they inhabit. Reading the entirety of Saezuru we find ourselves not having to travel much outside of the Tokyo metropolitan area, we get a sense of where certain events take place and of real districts and buildings in the city, so much so that people have drawn maps to visit some of them.

You can’t do quite the same thing with Shangri-La, not only because it’s undisclosed what either the island nor the mainland and country are called, but because the whole scenario is barely plausible in terms of real world economics or circumstances. Apollo’s job doesn’t even make sense, unless you buy into the proprietor of the brothel’s business model. I had to suspend my disbelief very hard very quickly. It’s fantastical, and exotic and barely credible, except that sex work and sex tourism are a very sensitive and interconnected issue in many areas in Southeast Asia, making Shangri-La’s exoticism, orientalism and hyper-sexualization feel a-critically exploited. There are talks in the manga about underage prostitution and groups pushing for changes in the legislation around sex work, but the topic is yet to be explored and because this is an imaginary place, it doesn’t really seem that the matter is considered in more realistic or detailed terms. The discussion is just a device to create an ambience and a sense of precariousness, Phi’s whole existence can’t stay as it is much longer.

Saezuru portrays yakuza and police in terms that are relatable to the real world, including references to laws and how criminal activities or social interactions are handled. Using the real world as a setting, Yoneda can add details and layers to story and characters that feel very grounded. It adds credibility, and the possibility of exploration into the social background of different characters less as a plot device (tragic backstory) and instead in more rich terms, in relatable yet different mentalities and habits associated with certain experiences. Shangri-La’s setting is much more similar to romance novels, Phi is the ingénue prostitute that doesn’t know or understand many common things. He adapted to extraordinary environmental conditions as best as he could but never grew out of them, sheltered in this artificial paradise based upon fleeting pleasures. Apollo’s role is quite clear: the straight man, so serious he was married, he desired one exclusive person to love and was instead betrayed. There is not much about him in three whole volumes compared to how much we get to know about Doumeki in the first three chapters, and that will only get explored more. About Apollo, we received most of the information from his best friend, who is also conveniently his lawyer, another character who seems to be around only for help with the exposition.

The insistence upon Apollo’s sexual orientation is interesting as well because it serves more as a fantasy than anything else: he will resist the charms of everyone except The One. And True Love surpasses any limitations, including sexual orientation or preferences in that one instance. Is Doumeki the same? I would argue that this is exactly what Yashiro seems to say when he’s talking to Kamiya. Doumeki is straight, is attracted to women, it so just happened that he was attracted to Yashiro as a one time exception. But is Yashiro’s reasoning or what he says out loud the most reliable source of information about what things actually are meant to be understood in Saezuru? And this is the same for every character, every one is telling the story according to their partial knowledge and understanding. No one seems to ask Doumeki. Would Kuga say that Doumeki is straight? There is a level of complexity and multiplication of the points of view in Saezuru, brief conversations and moments that are hints, like we are witnessing the story more than we are told about it. And everyone is left wondering. Common tropes are brought down to earth, in my opinion. Doumeki said that he had no knowledge of the possibility of being attracted to men until he met Yashiro and he felt so strongly that he regained sexual desire. Yashiro now isn’t able to respond to other men in the same way as before, but Doumeki is the exception, he is The One, right? But these circumstances if analyzed deeply have deep emotional implications and can be also explained using common sense. Here is Misumi using the aforementioned common sense:

There are other stylistic choices too in how the narrative is constructed that I noticed. Zariya is a talented and expert artist and designed stunning, sexy and appealing panels since the very first pages. The inner dialogue of Phi helps getting the reader into the story and creating expectations for the storytelling as a whole: “Lips are made for lying. People learn how to lie just by living. And the eyes… They know when others are watching. The hands though… They’re terrible liars. If you pay close attention, you’ll find shadows of the person’s character, even hints of their past. All in all… They’re rather eloquent speakers”.

Now I was engaged: I was ready to look at how characters move and use their hands like Sherlock Holmes. I expected that the manga would follow through with that, but it’s for things like the imprint of the ring or the habit of biting your nails. It’s disappointing to me, because did you have to make it so explicit? So mundane even.

Many instances of Yashiro bringing his hands to his face to hide parts of it or the entirety of it, including this heartbreaking moment at the end of ch 25, when the act of bringing them back down almost suggests that he has put a mask back on before looking up directly at you, nowhere in the text there is an explicit declarations about hands or that gesture, but nevertheless the execution of these moments makes them very poignant. It’s two different ways of doing things that cement for me, according to my own preferences, the high level of subtle expression that Yoneda manages to achieve.

When the story of Shangri-La progresses and Apollo becomes more interested in Phi, he asks to borrow a psychology book that tells him how the habit of biting around one’s fingernails is a sign of stress or anxiety. In the same way, most conversations with other people are about getting to discuss and explicitly communicate the meaning behind a certain behavior, or pieces of information about someone else’s character. This kind of 1:1 exposition, plain observational analysis rendered explicit is a sign of either a mistrust toward the ability of the readers to understand things implicitly or just plain lack of anything else to fill the pages with between a sex scene and the next.

The amount of information that we have about secondary characters in Saezuru, about their motivations and personalities, in comparison is astounding. It’s clear that Yoneda knows even more about each character who speaks in any given scene than what has been portrayed. There is so much going on, so much past and lingering feelings, from resentment to personal grudges and grievances, to power dynamics and their consequences and external pressures and events happening at any time.

It would be interesting for example making a comparison of the relationships between the proprietor of the brothel and Phi on one hand and between Misumi and Yashiro on the other. What we came to learn about Misumi is so much more in terms of quantity and in terms of believability - it makes more believable Yashiro’s position as yakuza - that it is quite difficult to decide where the proprietor of Shangri-La stands in terms of overall intentions or values in having rescued and sheltered and kept Phi quite in the same position of dependency. It appears to me that the character is there just to set the stage: he is the owner of the theater.

It’s unreality and it’s just a stage after all to play a sexual fantasy. All the drama that surely will come will follow the same fictional rules of everything else. It’s not bad, it’s just another way to tell a story. The art is visually pleasing, but the paneling didn’t capture my attention or worked for me as well, in comparison to Yoneda’s more cinematic style and composition. It’s theatrical production vs shooting on location yet using multiple different camera angles for every dialogue. To try to explain the difference in another way: I imagine that the usual disclaimer "All characters appearing in this work are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental" that needs to be used for movies or tv shows set in real environments and with fictional portrayals of real world events and scenarios could apply to a live action adaptation of Saezuru and be considered unnecessary to Shangri-La. Still, realism in fiction isn’t about making stories be like documentaries or having the same purpose exactly, but about exploring how we perceive the real world and about possibilities.

What do you think? There is more to say in terms of power dynamics and positions between each individual in the two main pairs and the role of others, and in terms of expectations and desirable outcomes readers might dream about in simple ways or taking instead a different approach. But I really don’t want this to be a too long of a reading and if you made it here, thank you so much. I hope this doesn’t come across as too harsh or anything about Shangri-La. If you want to add some other observations or give another perspective, please do. This was just an attempt to draw a comparison and reveal big differences in approach between manga that still can seem very similar at first glance.

[theside-b]

Quick talk about FC Soldout, the KBL that IQIYI dropped out of nowhere and five people watched:

Features the cast of City Boy Log, the BL series in vlog format, so if you feel like some faces are familiar it’s probably because you saw clips of them kissing before.

This series is most likely part of the deal IQIYI had with CBL — one of the show’s seasons was exclusive to the platform in some markets, as of recently it seems it was an one-and-done deal.

Tech aspect is curious: it was filmed on a light digital device, either a phone or a handheld camera, and is in a constant 60fps rate, which gives the show that very distinctive feeling of watching those Samsung commercials we often see on TV screens displayed in stores. This could indicate an automatic setting during filming, which is faster and cheaper to use since it doesn't require qualified operation. TV/movies are usually shot at a rate of 24fps, and although most are now filmed on digital, the technical specifications still require a great understanding of camera operation.

Personal Take Here: Despite being an IQIYI original the platform itself has provided no information about the show. There has been little to no promotional material, prior to episode two we didn't even knew who the director was, nor the writers and producers, a cast list was not provided either. My guess is that they were contractually obligated to fulfill their end of the deal with the City Boy Log crew, and that included an original show, even though the distribution deal was not renewed for a new season of the webseries, and so they are pretty much dumping this one — would also guess that the release schedule was set on the contract as well, CBL team probably wanting to synergize show and vlogs, the show's release coincided with the latest 'volume' hitting YouTube.

Interestingly enough the first episode, which was made available for free at IQIYI, does not feature the credits...* *not at launch at least, this could've changed but I'm not going there just to check this out lol

I just wanted to get that out of my system really 😂 but yeah, if this whole show reeks of “low budget” it’s because it is, and nothing wrong with that, "adversity breeds creativity" — imma a bit of a nerd with the ins and outs of tv/film productions so is somewhat fascinating seeing what the City Boy Log team managed to get out of their deal with IQIYI (their currently on-going season is back to its origins, after a brief stint on IQIYI that had a tepid reception by the fandom).

I'm going to put my tinfoil hat here: Something tells me that Civluvs got played here. If I had to guess the Js were supposed to be the leads and got demoted during production — they are by all accounts the biggest draw and got crumbs in the show and I think we can all agree that they could easily eclipse the main couple — being replaced by actors not related to the digital mother-ship show and my hunch is that this happened because since there was no renewal of the City Boy Log contract, IQIYI being responsible for FC Soldout production and having no ties with CBL anymore saw no reason to give them a platform to promote the new vlogs.

[ineffable-opinions]

BL “Censorship” & Commercialization

Content: 1. ubiquitous censorship - special focus on Japanese BL 2. commercial viability of live action BL & generalizations 3. solutions - special focus on state support of Thai BL 4. [update state-supported production of Love in the Big City series]

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Censorship is a sensitive topic. I have tried my best. Please feel free to comment and critique.

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History of Korean BL is one of censorship and commercialization and Korean fu-people has struggled against both. There have been different victors at different points in time. Aljosa Puzar’s "BL"(Boy Love), "GL"(Girl Love) and Female Communities of Practice and Affect in South Korea chronicles that struggle. (Highly recommended.)

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I have tried to problematize BL commercialization before. But that was in the context of fu-culture and the commodity fetishism associated with the consumption of BL, particularly in live action form which is probably its most capitalist rendition for many many reasons.

Here I would like to look at it from another angle: censorship. This is a continuation of my earlier post (Why so many shonen ai live-action?) motivated by the live action adaptation of ‘조폭인 내가 고등학생이 되었습니다’ (I, A Gangster, Became a High School Student) by 호롤 (Ho Rol).

The live action has jumped genres switching from BL to 판타스틱 휴먼 드라마 (lit. fantasy human drama). This switch got it tagged as ‘Censored Adaptation of Same-sex Original Work’ on My Drama List. I personally don’t like that tag. Almost all BL adaptation is a censored adaptation, with notable exceptions like Sei no Gekiyaku. But no one uses that tag for, say, 25 Ji, Akasaka de (2024) which censored all sexual content, especially from the volume 1 of the manga which was critical to the story and the couple’s development in the original manga series’ and its multiple adaptations’ popularity. Sukiyanen Kedo Do Yaro ka (2024) went as far as removing the more sexual second couple from the live action adaptation all together, yet it does not get a "censored" tag.

An interesting question that the controversy surrounding High School Return of a Gangster (2024) has sparked is that of BL media’s commercial viability, especially in live action form. Here’s what producers told the Korean newspaper, Hankook Ilbo, about the genre-jumping:

"BL 장르는 제작비 투자나 리쿱(제작비 회수)에 한계가 있는 게 사실이다. 그러다 보니 처음부터 이 작품은 브로맨스로 해보고 싶었다"

“The BL genre is limited in terms of investment in production costs and recoup (recovery of production costs). So, from the beginning, we planned it as a bromance (beulomaenseu).”

The author of this article cites examples of works that enjoyed success on OTT platforms, namely Watcha’s Semantic Error and TVing's Unintentional Love Story (2023). However, the article also highlights the fact that BL continues to be a niche genre and live action adaptations don’t guarantee success.

이성택 (Lee Seong Taek), the director of High School Return of a Gangster, previously directed the BL Love Class (2022). The producer 넘버쓰리픽쳐스 (Number Three Pictures Co., Ltd.) have BL works like Unintentional Love Story under its belt.

'Unintentional Love Story' Director Jang Eui-soon (장의순) | source

If the producer of one of the two most popular live action BL is admitting to it, then it is not easy to dismiss the issue of commercial viability of live action BL.

Very famous BL publishing houses (starting with JUNE) and hosting platforms with relatively lower expenses have struggled. Some of them are no more. It is also difficult for authors to survive merely on earnings from publishing houses and hosting platforms, especially when those platforms are not very rich. So, it is not difficult to imagine that live action production houses also struggle to survive.

Take GMMTV for example. They are probably one of the most successful BL producers. According to their managing director, BL content (series) is not a profitable business in itself. They rely on khujin (branded pairs) of actors to bring in advertisement revenue, merchandize sales, and pull crowds to concerts and fan-meets. It is not enough for actors to just act. They are expected to sing, dance and perform. Meanwhile, GMMTV is forced to keep working with these actor pairs and stick to templates that suit them. While it works for now, it remains to be seen how long the business model can last.

Now there is also investment from Mainland China that has migrated to other BL producers following dangai ban. But those who invest already burned themselves pretty bad with all the money they poured in during the short-lived but explosive dangai boom. It is sunk cost at this point. Another crack down could be the death knell for Chinese investments in BL. 

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More generally, it is likely that commercial viability of a live action BL project hinges on the following:

#1 Target demographic

Like all other BL content, live action too is primarily targeted at fu-people (BL audience) – both queer and non-queer. The target demography is further sub-divided based on the type of BL and purchasing power.

Sweeter ones are supposed to appeal to all ages and that’s the area Thailand and GMMTV in particular are focused on. Most of Japanese BL series are sweet. Korea too produces sweet BL. However, they are unlikely to bring in explosive success the way odo BL (those following royal road narrative progression – wherein characters face significant challenges, interpersonal or otherwise, to reach happy ending).

Older and, perhaps more hard-core fans, are likely to support jado works (BL that follow the evil path where neither happy ending nor resolution to challenges are guaranteed) with surprising frequency. This might be partly due to the erotic content in jado works.

Purchasing power of BL fans vary widely. There are those who are

“sending gifts to their actors in Thailand, sending food trucks to their shooting locations, putting up billboard advertisements and doing charity events [as well as] ordering merchandise in bulk.”

They also travel to BL producing nations [on fan pilgrimages] and attend fan meetings, concerts and other events regularly.

(Source: The Print)

The other group of BL fans who are probably younger and/or can’t afford to show support in the above-mentioned ways. BL commercially benefits from being appealing to those with higher purchasing power.

#2 Popularity of original work in case of adaptation  

Popular BL novels, manhwa, etc. bring in a set of fans who are interested in the live action. Longer and more-acclaimed works are likely to ensure success of the live action given decent making and reasonable changes during adaptation. Semantic Error is a case in point. However, missteps during adaptation can have the opposite effect.

#3 Cost of production

It is difficult to get investment in the first place, especially with how niche the genre is. Moreover, higher cost of production sets the bar for success higher too.

On the other hand, high production quality and better cast and crew (likely more expensive too) makes the viewing more pleasurable and increases the likelihood of success.

There are other factors which influence the success of BL producers. The most popular BL live action from China, Addicted, was produced by the author, Chai JiDan, with a tiny budget. Its dangai family drama remake, Stay with Me, also has an interesting producer.

Source | Mame with her Japanese fans

Orawan Vichayawannakul’s MeMindY is another BL author led production company that has enjoyed considerable success.

OP Pictures’ entry into BL genre has also been successful.

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Solutions

#1 Let’s start with the worst

BL as money laundering vehicle. It is probably the most obvious, sort of win-win until it isn’t. Sustainability depends how much skin the ruling class have in the game.

#2 State sponsorship

(or better yet, tax payer supported BL production)

State sponsorship is what Thailand has perfected.

source | 2023 seminar on "Beyond Borders: Exploring the Global Appeal and Diversity of Thailand's Boys' Love Contents" by 9 companies from Thailand organized by Department of International Trade Promotion under Thailand’s Ministry of Trade.

The eleven speakers, including an official from the Office of Commercial Affairs, Royal Thai Embassy in Japan, vigorously pitched partnerships with Japanese content companies [at the above-mentioned seminar.]

Also, several of the companies pitching at the seminar, such as Star Hunter Entertainment […] were plumping for BL not as a niche product but rather a core element of their corporate strategy.

Halo Productions representative Tewarat Supunnium [trumpeted] the vertical integration of his company, from talent representation to contents distribution.

source

Thai BL has been big hits in China, South Korea, Japan, India, Indonesia, the Philippines, and beyond, which has motivated Thailand’s government to ‘deploy Boys Love as its latest soft power weapon to promote the country on the global stage’. In an article published in The Nation, BL director, Bundit Sintanaparadee, explains how that affects production.

He pointed out that the international popularity of Thai shows can boost tourism and generate interest in the featured locations – a vital aspect of soft power. The government can facilitate this process by providing support and streamlining the bureaucratic obstacles to filming in attractive locations like Bangkok’s Chinatown district of Yaowarat.

Filming in iconic places such as Yaowarat can be costly and complicated due to the need to coordinate with multiple government agencies and pay location fees. Bundit said the government could simplify the process to benefit not just filmmakers but also tourist revenue in the locations.

Bundit also cautioned against a top-down approach to soft power, where the government dictates what represents Thailand on the world stage. He emphasises the need for industry professionals to have their say.

source

In a 2022 article, Bangkok Post explores the impact of BL on Thailand’s economy ‘as export products that can draw lucrative revenue streams and foster business opportunities in other areas, including tourism.’

[According to government estimates from 2021,] Thailand's Y content market was worth more than 1 billion baht... In June that year, the Department of International Trade Promotion held an online Y content business matching event to boost the industry, with the participation of 10 Thai content creators. More than 360 million baht was generated from the purchase of the Thai content, with the top three buyers coming from Japan, Taiwan and Vietnam.

Noppharnach Chaiyahwimhon, GMMTV's senior director of content production, said [that the] business ecosystem linked to Y Series in Thailand shows a growth of 30-40% per year. [He also said that] Y Series can also be a boon for other businesses, such as films, artist management and merchandise. [He mentioned] Y Series from Thailand [getting] translated into several languages [and one of their Y Series having received theatrical adaptation in South Korea.]

[According to] Kanokporn Prachayaset, chief commercial officer and country manager of WeTV Thailand, … Y Series from Thailand is one of the most popular content genres on its platform. [Half of all the BL content on the platform was Thai.] WeTV [was] sourcing Y Series from Asia as well as having its own WeTV original shows by working with various local production houses, such as GMMTV, TV Thunder, Dee Hup House, M Choice Studio and All This Entertainment. [She also highlighted the contribution of the fan base, which is] active in organising activities and campaigns for their idols.

Seksan Sripraiwan, director of the Tourism Authority of Thailand's (TAT) Tokyo office, said the TAT and the Royal Thai Embassy have actively promoted the country by using Thai entertainment [and that] Thai BL content is considered one of the most popular recent cultural exports to Japan. Japan's market for Thai BL is around 1 million viewers, of which 20,000-30,000 are heavily active on social media sites for renowned BL actors, led by Bright-Win and Krist-Singto. He said Japanese tour operators already offered tailor-made tour packages which contain elements related to BL TV series, such as shooting locations like universities, cafes, Wat Arun or the Amphawa floating market.

Kanokkittika Kritwutikon, director of the TAT Chengdu office, said Thai BL TV shows have gained popularity in China, such as the coming-of-age series "I Told Sunset About You", which helped drive tourists to Phuket, the main location of the story.

"Most Chinese BL fans are millennial females who can offer long-term support for their favourite actors," Mrs Kanokkittika said. [Recognizing the 3 million strong queer population of Chongqing,] she said the LGBT segment could be categorised as luxury travellers as they are high-income earners, live in key cities, and want to spend more for travel experiences.

source

Earlier this year Ministry of Commerce have partnered with Be On Cloud and Idol Factory to promote ‘Thai products, services, tourism, and culture by incorporating them seamlessly into’ their new series “Shine” and “Pin Phak” aka “The Loyal Pin” respectively.

“This will help create around 2 billion in value for Thailand’s economy,” said Commerce Minister Phumtham.

Deputy Prime Minister and Commerce Minister Phumtham Wechayachai and two actresses, Becky and Freen, witness the signing ceremony between the Ministry of Commerce and Idol Factory Co., Ltd. on February 28, 2024....

According to the Department of International Trade Promotion, the Thai movie and series sector and related industries will generate 8,000 million baht in exports by 2023. In 2024, it will likely reach 10,000 million baht, particularly in the Y-movie and Y-series, which are expected to expand in value from 1,000 million baht to 2,000 million baht as a result of the Ministry of Commerce’s proactive cooperation with the private sector.

source

The Thai government’s efforts are paying off.

Oramon Sapthaweetham, director-general of the Department of Business Development, revealed that the Boys’ Love series had helped revitalise the film production industry, generating substantial profits and extending economic benefits to allied sectors, such as advertising, leveraging actors as influencers, event organisation, and tourism. 

"Over the past 10 years, Thailand has produced over 177 Boys’ Love [series], continuously gaining popularity and expanding its customer base, eventually leading to exports to international markets," Oramon added.

The film production industry in Thailand is witnessing substantial growth. In the first four months of 2024, 56 new businesses were registered, marking a 12% increase from 2023. The total registered capital also saw a significant rise of 146.44% to 195.18 million baht. In 2023, the industry grew by 20% with 137 businesses and a capital of 258 million baht. The total revenue in 2022 was 12.895 billion baht, indicating a continuous growth trend.

source

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#3 Diversification

Ok, so this is based on my limited knowledge and imagination. Feel free to skip.

There are two production companies that I have ever been interested in - Bhavana Studios and Mammootty Kampany. Both of them have produced experimental Malayalam movies while managing to remain commercially successful. While is partially attributable to these companies being brands, I think their overall strategy of diversification have worked in their favour.

Mammootty Kampany could produce art-house movie Nanpakal Nerathu Mayakkam for award circuits and with no expectation of commercial performance by banking on their other production Kannur Squad which was action entertainer sure to bring in the big bucks. Their queer family drama Kaathal – The Core and neo-noir psychological thriller Rorschach did exceptionally well in the box office as well as garnered critical acclaim. Bhavana Studios has similar track record of their commercially successful projects kind of cross subsidizing their experimental and unique projects and lifting the heat off in case of flops.

Having production companies which are aspirational in their approach to BL while having the economics sorted out help where government support is not forth coming.

Censorship as No-thing

When sometime is truly censored, we wouldn’t know. Unless we ask. Here’s what Jooyin Saejang learned from asking.

Conclusion

I have a strong preference for live action adaptations that are willing to go the last mile in terms of sexual content, social critiques and addressing real-life issues. That’s the reason why the header image for this BL side blog is from Moothon (2019).

But realistically this isn’t always possible. And I prefer having more production companies offering variety. I don’t want them to sink under the weight of BL that didn’t do well commercially and me being left at the mercy of media conglomerates with seemingly bottomless funds and monopsony over BL authors, original works and the culture that creates them.

Also, there is queer content from Korean that is neither mainstream nor from fu-culture. Support those. Unfortunately, Cheers by Cheers 짠!하면 알 수 있어 has been removed from their YouTube channel which is now called Cheer Up. While the series is gone, there are interviews with English subtitles.

Love in the Big City

Love in the Big City, the series and the movie are based on Park Sang-young's novel of the same name that was published in 2019. In Korea, it sold over 100,000 copies. Ever since, it has been translated into 15 languages, including English. The English translation by Anton Hur was published in 2021. The book has been longlisted for the International Booker Prize in 2022 and the Dublin Literary Award in 2023.

The movie secured an investor early on. The film was produced by Showbox and Tale Farming (고래와유기농). Michigan Venture Capital, a key investor, was responsible for 2 billion won out of the net production cost of about 6 billion won. Plus M Entertainment, a subsidiary of the JoongAng Group took care of its distribution. (source)

State-sponsorship for Korean BL !

The series, on the other hand, faced difficulty attracting investment as well as had trouble finding OTT platforms willing to air the show. It was co-produced by MerryChristmas, a subsidiary of WYSIWYG Studio' a KOSDAQ-listed company, along with Big Stone Studio. Mbrella Films provided production services in Thailand. They have received the state-support through Korea Creative Content Agency under Ministry of Culture, Sports and Tourism amounting to 3 billion won as production costs support aimed at strengthening the global competitiveness of K-content through OTT.

Finally, TVING, a platform that has aired multiple BL projects previously (such as Unintentional Love Story, Jazz for Two, To My Star 2, The Eighth Sense and High School Return of a Gangster), aired the series in South Korea and the streaming platform Rakuten Viki promoted it as a BL.

An iconic scene from bonus chapter 2 of The New Employee aka The New Recruit manhwa adaptation (web novel written by Moscareto and illustrated by Zec) ahead that didn't make it into the live action adaptation.

Gong comes home to find su in a sexy position at the doorway, fingering himself according to gong's instructions over phone.

[talk-danmei-to-me]

Ranking my Autumn of Danmei: Results

A.k.a Another poll where my answers are completely different

Tumblr Ranking

1. Svsss/Scum Villain Self Saving System

2. Qjj/Ballad of Sword and Wine

3. Yuwu/Remnants of Filth

4. Bing an Ben/Case File Compendium

5. To Rule in a Turbulent World

My Ranking

1. Yuwu/Remnants of Filth

2. Qjj/Ballad of Sword and Wine

3. Bing an Ben/Case File Compendium

4. To Rule in a Turbulent World

5. Svsss/Scum Villain Self Saving System

Fangirling beneath the read more

1. Yuwu/Remnants of Filth

This will have come as no surprise to my followers. I adore Meatbun’s style of storytelling and vol 5 was SO GOOD! Ximang deserve the world and vol 5 was delivering. Yuwu also has some of the best dedication to angst I’ve experienced in a danmei.

2. Qjj/Ballad of Sword and Wine

I read the first vol straight off the back of 4 volumes of Yuwu and I think the book hangover coloured my view of it. After vol 5 of Yuwu I had more craving for military Danmei and omg did vol 2 deliver! Obsessed with Cezhou and the level of courtly politicking and intrigue is way up there with early game of thrones. Y’know when game of thrones was good. Also kind of Captive Prince vibes. I can see this one climbing significantly with each volume that releasing because it’s just so my jam!

3. Bing an Ben/Case File Compendium

Meatbun at her most unhinged and I am here for it! Literally for fans of bl as a genre there’s something so nostalgic about it. It’s channelling every toxic yaoi scanlation I’ve read. So good. He Yu and Xie Qingcheng are your new favourite straight men.

4. To Rule in a Turbulent World

I got so into this when I first started, it’s offering a bit of courtly drama and the protagonist is hilarious. Outrageous to give us that level of smut in chapter 3 as well. And we have another farm arc in danmei… one might start to suspect farming is a trope 😉 where I’m up to has got a little bit too wholesome though, but the writing style has me preordering every Fei Tian Ye Xiang book Seven Seas has licensed.

5. Svsss/Scum Villain Self Saving System

Full disclosure I dropped it 3/4 of the way through vol 1 but I’ve included it because of the amount of suggestions/reccs for it I’ve had since becoming a danmei blog.

The fandom makes me want to like this so much because it feels huge compared to series I’m actually ride or die for. Personally, I just don’t find it funny and I struggle with the transmigration/system aspects of it. It just makes the world feel fake (because it is) and investing is really hard. Luo Binghe was the only thing I vibed with.

I think part of the problem is that I branched out into other danmei instead of finishing all of mxtx’s works and mxtx just isn’t my favourite.

That’s not a slight on mxtx by the way, obviously she’s significant in the western danmei boom and getting the series I am insanely invested in licensed and I had a good time whilst reading tgcf and mdzs.

But for me I think it’s like how I first got into bl through Sekaiichi Hatsukoi (for others it was probably Junjou Romantica the analogy still works). Like I have a lot of love for it, but I wouldn’t class it as my favourite bl although the yaoi hands and pointy chins are 👌

Anyways, back to svsss and danmei… I’m in two minds now whether I should read or skip Misvil OR if reading Misvil will allow me to power through to complete svsss by conning me into reading transmigration since it’s supposed to be quite gritty.

[destroy-some-evil]

So... I'm watching Until We Meet Again while waiting for more episodes of The Sign (because I need more reincarnated soulmates please and thank you).

And I can tell the narrative says this:

But my theory presupposes that maybe:

Look I get it - the narrative really wants us to buy that Korn is the "strong silent" type and Dean, as his reincarnation, is similar in attitude but a way better Dom because he learned from his past life and became better at caring for his loved ones. Meanwhile, Intouch was the "adorable cinnamon bun" in the past who couldn't cook and occasionally pushed Korn's boundaries, and now as Pharm, who can cook (character development!), is basically the perfect sub to Dean's Dom (yes, I read @lutawolf's post about the soft D/s moments in the series and clicked subscribe -what off it). I get that's the story they are showing. Also, I like the story it's been fun to watch and I'm looking forward to the last two episodes.

But - but what if

Korn who basically was forced to be the strong silent type because he was the eldest and not allowed to be soft with how his dad raised him. He just wanted read literature volume 4 or what ever but circumstances and society expected different of him. I don't know there is something sweet to think that in his next life he gets to be that soft boy who likes cooking. Who still takes care of those around but he doesn't have to force himself to be the visibly strong one all the time. Both Korn and Pharm were both the ones who were initially afraid of what it meant to love this person in front of them.

Meanwhile, Intouch, who just wanted to care for Korn, makes that the core of who he is in his next life. He's not as carefree as he once was, but he still loves to be in the water. (All In's suggestions for vacations related to water. The beach vacation they took and the raft one they never got to do.) He still loves teasing his boyfriend and he still makes it his life goal to make him happy. Also, he can now at least follow directions for cooking but it's not something expected of him. And on a more serious note, he's more able to protect Pharm than Intouch was able to protect Korn. Korn probably would have never allowed Intouch to protect him because he had to be the one in charge; even if, maybe, he didn't want to be. Also, both Intouch and Dean are the ones who see their other half and go, "yes, that's him. He's the one I'm going be with for the rest of my life." No hesitation, just plans for how he's going put a ring on it. (I also have a headcannon that Dean was the one to suggest the red thread faculty tours. His fellow classmates tease that Dean's thread is already picked out for Pharm. And in the past Intouch is the one to tie the red thread on Korn.)

I also get that visually the show wanted to associate that Intouch and Pharm look similar and that Korn and Dean look similar because that makes it easy.

But you know what stupid romantic is this post about the Japanese legend that you have the face of the person you loved the most in your previous life (okay so the post applying that legend to Avatar the Last Airbender but it's still stupid romantic).

Apply that to these two and tell me it's not sweet and romantic to think that they get reborn into the same families they were originally in and that they are surrounded by people who loved them in both their lives and now those people have grown and learned to support them AND they have the face of the person who they loved most in their past life.

Yes, I'm late to the party (I only found found out about how to get easy access to Thai BLs in October 2023 - thank you @talistheintrovert) but I have thoughts. Also this was fun.

[ticklygiggles]

Lovelynim's tickletober Day 2: Accident

Ichikawa Giichi x Kikuchihara Jin

A/N: Day two! Big thanks to lovely @ppystkposts for requesting these two 😍 I'm so happy this manga got an anime because it's SO GOOD! I hope you enjoy it, cutie MWAH 💕

So far, in the story of my life...

"This time I really messed up!" Jin groaned in despair, looking at the mess on the floor.

This is what he got for taking things without permission. You shouldn't assume that your partner's things belong to you... especially when you know that there are things that don't really belong to them. Like that exquisite limited edition manga he just ruined!

Jin thought it would be a good idea, a very innocent good idea, to borrow the second volume of the bl manga that Giichi had lent him last night. He sat comfortably on the floor with his back leaning on Giichi's bed, the manga in one hand and a can of soda that Rei had given him in the other. Who would have thought that he would fall asleep for who knows how long and that when he woke up he would find that not only had the manga fallen from his hand, but also the soda can and the liquid had fallen on the book, completely damaging it.

Jin didn't even try to dry it, the soda had literally fallen on the manga like a fountain, no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't fix it with absolutely anything.

Giichi was going to kill him. Worse yet, he was going to break up with him! He could hear him already: 'Didn't I tell you clearly that these mangas belong to my little sister?! Couldn't you just wait for me to arrive?!'

"Oh no. Oh no. Oh no- eek!"

"Hi. I'm ba-"

"I am so sorry!" Jin yelled lifting the still dripping book up for Giichi to look at it. "I am so so so sorry! I swear it was an accident! I was dr-drinking some soda and then I fell asleep and- and it was all Rei's fault because he gave it to me! Agh, of course it wasn't his fault, I just-"

"Please tell me that's not a limited edition one."

"... I'm so sorry."

Jin flinched when he heard Giichi sighing heavily, looking up at him he saw him throwing his backpack to the side and rubbing his temples as he closed the door behind him.

"I'm so sorry! I'll- I'll get a new one! No matter what I'll definitely get it!"

"Do you even know what 'limited edition' means?"

Jin flinched. Of course he knew... it meant it was limited as in you can't get it anywhere else. He groaned, finally letting the dirty manga fall on the floor.

"I- I promise I'll get it! Punish me, Ichikawa Giichi, but please don't break up with me!" Jin clasped his hands together in prayer, his eyes nearly filled with tears. "Please!"

Giichi sighed again and he nodded. "Fine." Jin flinched when Giichi suddenly fell on his knees in front of him. "Just know that I'll punish you until I think it's enough."

Something fluttered in Jin's chest, his cheeks flushing. No! Why was he getting excited over a punishment?! He nodded, gulping and closing his eyes.

"You also need to clean up this mess."

"I-I will, I prom- ahahaha!" Ridiculous, bubbly giggles erupted from his lips when Giichi suddenly grabbed his sides and squeezed them, tickling him. Jin squirmed, widening his eyes for one second before he shut them tightly again. "W-Wahahahait! Not thihihis!"

He tried to hold his laughter, gritting his teeth and whining, but it was impossible. He has always been terribly ticklish and he hated the day Giichi had found about it during one of their intimate times. He had simply brushed his spine a bit too lightly, and Jin was a giggly mess in seconds.

He should've known Giichi would choose this punishment.

"Quiet down. You're being too loud."

"It tihihihickles! H-How cahahan Ihihi- ahahah! N-No, nohohot thehehere!" Jin was almost sure he heard Giichi chuckling, but with his loud, high-pitched laughter, he couldn't really tell.

Giichi's fingers moved up and down Jin's torso at maddening speed, preventing Jin from getting too used to one spot before jumping to the other. Jin fell back onto the floor and Giichi easily straddled him, finding that horribly ticklish spot on the back of Jin's ribs, very close to his spine. Jin squealed overwhelmingly loudly as he threw his head back and arched his body up, trying to escape Giichi's fingers, but he couldn't, and it was entirely his fault for ruining something that wasn't even his.

He deserved this... but he was still too ticklish and couldn't help but squirm and laugh uncontrollably, blushing up to his ears and feeling tears of laughter running down the sides of his face.

"You're already crying? I'm barely starting, you know?"

Ah, he would definitely never take anything without permission ever again.

BONUS SCENE

"You know...," Giichi said after he finished wrecking Jin. The poor third year was gasping and twitching after enduring the tickling of his life. "That really wasn't the limited edition one. It just has a different cover, that's all."

Jin blinked a couple of times before he lifted his face to look at Giichi, oh that little shit was smirking down at him. "You-! Then why did you- AHAHAHA! Nohoho! N-No, plehehease!"

"Because you shouldn't even grab my stuff without my permission. Serves you right."

Serves him right, indeed.

[the-golden-comet]

✨Writeblr Interview✨

Thank you for tagging me @nczaversnick , @phynewrites , @mrbexwrites , and @foyle-writes-things ! Appreciate the heck out of y’all 💛✨

Short stories, novels, or poems?

Novels for sure, to read and to write! ✨

What genre do you prefer reading?

Same ones as I write—BL Romantasies, high fantasies, low fantasies, adult fiction, Slice of Life, Enemies to Lovers, Slow Burn, Hurt/Comfort, Angst/Fluff/Smut 💫✨

Are you a planner or a write as I go kind of person?

Little of column A, little of column B. I think a healthy balance between the two makes for some great planned (and unplanned) adventures! 💛✨

What music do you listen to while writing?

So funny thing….I don’t listen to music when I write. But, my favorite writing white noise is gameplay of Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Dead by Daylight, or Friday the 13th without commentary, played at a very low volume. Something about a revving chainsaw sparks my motivation to write (or maybe it’s fear? 🤔)

Favorite books/movies?

Anything Disney +mutuals’s stories ✨

Any current WIPs?

So far finishing up YWIMC before I move on to something big….👀✨I have a lot of stories on the back-burner and am focusing on one at a time 💛

If someone were to make a cartoon out of you what would your standard outfit be?

Very comfortable gray-knit turtleneck or hoodie, comfy pants, stylin’ shoes, and my bag of holding (numerous things. Backpack I carry around that has all my daily necessities ✨)

Create a character description of yourself:

Okay picture Link from The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword. Got it? Okay. Make him gay. Give him some cartilage piercings. Maybe a few eye bags due to the insomnia. There you go. ✨

Oh also make him chaotic good. Because the world needs more kindness, and I will give the world more kindness. The world does not have a choice in the matter. 🌏💫✨

Do you like incorporating actual people you know into your writing?

Considering what I write? Absolutely not.

Are you kill happy with your characters?

Depends on the character and the narrative. I like happy endings, but sometimes a character must die. 🤷‍♂️

Coffee or Tea while writing?

While I write? Water. While I wake up? Coffee. While I get ready for bed? Tea.

Slow or fast writer?

Fast writer, slow motivator. Once I get on a groove I can usually go on 5-6 hour writing binges at a time. I just have to get there first with all of my projects….🫠✨

Where/who/what do you draw inspiration from?

Myself mainly, and my friends and mutuals secondly. I’ve been writing for myself since I started making fanfictions as a teenager, so I’ll never NOT make stories for myself. Gaining a supportive community on writeblr has given me an extra boost of motivation, because now I feel like I’m writing for myself AND for my friends and mutuals ✨

If you were in a fantasy world, what would you be?

The person that somehow finds themself in harrowing situations only to stumble my way out of the problem through sheer coincidence and bullshit. Or a bard. Probably a bard. Maybe both of these things 🤔✨

Most fav book cliche:

Two dumb idiots (/positive) go on an epic quest and learn about each other in the meanwhile. (See: The Emperor’s New Groove)

Least favorite cliche:

One-trick pony characters that lack depth, or exist just to check off a box.

Favorite scene to write?

Anything involving the two main protags.

Reason for writing?

My own personal enjoyment, and to share my crazy mind with the world for entertainment and create joy and inspiration to a community of genius minds (You. I’m talking about you. Yeah, YOU. Keep writing, keep inspiring, and keep on keeping on) 💖✨

Thank you again! I’m going to tag (no pressure): @tragedycoded , @wyked-ao3 , @gioiaalbanoart , @sableglass , @words-after-midnight , @saturnine-saturneight , @marlowethelibrarian , @davycoquette , @lychhiker-writes , @glasshouses-and-stones , @aintgonnatakethis , @honeybewrites , @drchenquill , @theink-stainedfolk , @the-letterbox-archives , @ominous-feychild , @mysticstarlightduck , @finickyfelix , @autism-purgatory , @moltenwrites , @rivenantiqnerd , @thecomfywriter , @somethingclevermahogony , @authorcoledipalo , @houseplantblank , +open tag ✨

[chronicoverthinker]

So uhm since people are talking about my tiktok I’m actually kinda upset about two things :

1-them saying that I’m accusing mokmoklen of queerbaiting when I’ve literally put a GIANT red disclaimer saying that I am in no way accusing the author since the story it’s still ongoing and I was just going to make a rundown of what the author has done recently that has made many upset with the recent chapter

2-that after reading my 30 slides all they’ve got was me saying that the queerbaiting is because Yoshiki’s ancestor is a woman WHICH IS NOT THE CASE AT ALL.

What has actually upset many , me included with hikarugashindaupdates as well who’s a dear friend of mine , is how mokmoklen has been backtracking from the original idea of the story and is now trying to erase all the subtext and implications of their feelings for one another.

When the story first started it was advertised as BL and horror , and the kind of dynamic she wanted to develop for Yoshiki and Hikaru was way different compared to what we got now (I talked about this in detail in my video so if you wanna know more look it up).

Around the beginning of volume 3 a shift happened. It first started with mokmoklen deciding to remove the BL tag , which tbh at that time still didn’t seem like that big of a deal. Especially to me , I’ve always felt like the story didn’t need to specifically be categorized as BL for Yoshiki and Hikaru’s feelings to shine through.

But then she started to make clear how “Hikaru” CANT whatsoever feel or understand human love.

Now this is where the first problems start , because in the first volumes you can clearly see that THIS is not the case AT ALL.

And it’s not proven only by his overall behavior in the story , but also from the art she used to post.

To be fair I wouldn’t even been mad about Yoshiki’s ancestor being a woman if you told me in volume 1 , because to me it was clear that Yoshiki and Hikaru loved each other.

And fundamentally speaking , since the story is still ongoing , I know that Yoshiki’s ancestor being a woman doesn’t really take anything from the possibility of Yoshiki and “Hikaru” still ending up together. But what truly upsets me about this it’s the intentions and the meaning behind this choice.

Plus the fact that mokmoklen made it clear that now Yoshiki doesn’t feel anything for “Hikaru”. It also worries me how she still hasn’t made Yoshiki open up about his feelings for the real Hikaru either. It’s as if what was so clear to us in the first volume is now being precluded to us for whatever reason.

Hikaru and Yoshiki’s love for each other and their homosexuality is one of the main points that makes them who their are and why they act in certain ways. Their struggles to accept their orientations in a closeted and homophobic village are what makes them such layered and complex characters.

And I literally concluded by saying that I do NOT believe that if this ever turns out to be queerbaiting she ever intended for any of this to happen since the beginning. Something is going on in her life because she has delated most of her BL works on her private accounts

[respectthepetty]

Not a Review: Manner of Death - Manga Version

I got the manga versions of Manner of Death that were released in 2023, and y'all . . .

This is wild bananas! Bun has an older brother and ex-boyfriend in Bangkok even though he is in the closet and dating women as a cover. Tan is younger, has a sick mother, and he thought Jane died by suicide because she was sad he was gay. Bodies are dropping dead left and right until the very end. Sorn and That aren't even side crumbs because they are just a crumb, as in one single crumb and nothing else. Oh, and the inspector is married, to a woman.

Pretty sure it follows the novel closely, so congratulations to Screenwriter Title, who was also behind He's Coming to Me, Dark Blue Kiss, Love Stage, and Low Frequency, for condensing the novel and making the series into a BL because looking at (a version of) the source material, Title really balanced this bad boy out for the show.

Combined, the two volumes are over 500 pages, which, once again, even though they aren't the original novel, probably are close to it, and there is constantly something happening on every single page. If this is how the novel was, trimming it down to a fourteen-episode series took skill. I loved Manner of Death, but people had issue with some of the plot holes in the series. However, compared to these versions of the original novel, the show is very focused and balanced.

These two volumes are enjoyable. I'm glad I have them to add to my small manga collection of BL favorites with Old Fashion Cupcake and Our Dining Table, but this journey is a lot. Seriously, Bun walks out to the balcony after having sex with Tan on the very last page since they got engaged in New York after reconciling two pages before, and a body falls from the sky. The End.

I know Tan proposed to Bun by pretending they were being taken hostage with guns pointed at their heads in the series, but . . . it wasn't a dead body jumping out of nowhere, you know?

Now I see how Dead Friend Forever aligns with Sammon's style, which is a non-ending ending where something ends, then starts again. That also happened in Make a Wish. And I ain't mad at it! It's just a lot, all at once, constantly. But it helps me appreciation the show more. I got two gay men who never felt bad about being gay and scoffed with the inspector even suggested they were straight. I got murder-mystery and romance. And I got a settled ending with Tan and Bun married.

Oh, and I got that kiss in the very beginning.

So this isn't a review. It's an appreciation post.

Because Manner of Death, the series, is solid.

[stoopid-turtle]

Consuming Candies Pt 2: DD ❤️ GG and GG ❤️ DD

ALL FAKE. I'M MAKING SHIT UP FOR FUN. DON'T BELIEVE ME.

Intro post for this series

Once I convinced myself that DD and GG are some variety of gay, the rest is honestly not hard to conceive of. Two gay guys filming a BL adaption on a set that was open to same-sex relationships who got on really well...it's not hard to believe they'd "get together".

3. DD and GG had "a thing" around the time of the TU production. This could include the time period during filming and through the promo period. Actual timelines and details of the nature of the relationship are secondary.

If an actor and an actress hit it off as well as DD and GG did, it'd be easy for people to see that they were an item. For some reason, people struggle more to see that with two men (okay, I know the reasons, but I'm not getting into that here).

By the time I'd established 1 and 2, I'd seen enough bts and other footage to buy in to 3, as well, but here's the list of moments/candies that just nail it for me. It would be impossible for me to list out all the moments that simply scream "They're in a relationship!!!" because there's, just, a lot. So here's the short list, again, in order of most inarguable to more open to interpretation.

a) Old cow eats young grass.

That's it. That's the clip. There is no het explanation for that. I guess you could maybe claim DD was referring to GG liking younger women, but that doesn't flow with the rest of the conversation they're having. Especially with GG's comment about paying for new brake pads,

They did the gay together. More than just casually. They were an item at this time. Hands down. Case closed.

(Again, I'll get to the argument that this is all fabricated fanservice at another point)

b) The bts of DD getting into costume where he's quizzing the costume-jiejie about what GG said about him in an interview.

This is straight-up, cliche, 'shows up in freaking romance novels' behavior when you have a crush. Nobody's that concerned about what their friend is saying about them in interviews. You only care that much when you're trying to get a feel as to their feelings for you.

Also, the costume-jiejie is hilarious about it. Asking him about his response in an interview and then teasing him about not remembering what GG said about DD. She clearly has served as a sounding board for DD about his crush before, and she's amused and encouraging and teasing, all at the same time. Hats off, costume-jiejie.

c) Happy Camp moments: jealous!GG and the necklace.

I don't usually put much stock in the jealous GG/DD stories, but the instance with GG going grimdark as DD wriggled through the hole with another guy is just...again, I'm struggling to think of a context that would make sense that isn't "they are together and GG is jealous".

(I don't find jealousy cute, tbh, so I'm not jazzed about the moment. I don't know what was going on between them that led to that, but I'm glad they seemed to clear it up).

This leads to the other Happy Camp moment, seen only in fancams. The ox-head necklace that DD had been wearing scratched up his neck during the game. GG's stunned reaction to DD's injuries and his concern, plus clearly telling DD to take it off...none of this makes sense unless GG gave DD the jewelry.

Like, okay. I have a necklace my bff gave me, and I wear it a lot. It's really meaningful and sentimental. But if it were scratching up my neck, I'd take it off. If she were there while it was scratching up my neck, she'd joke about it and agree that I should take it off. She wouldn't look distraught.

My wife, on the other hand...

c) DDU's 11th anniversary episode

There's no way to describe this episode except that it really felt as if DD was having his new partner meet his fam. The fact that DDU stopped throwing women at DD after that speaks volumes.

From a), it's clear that their relationship was pretty serious (and extended after the end of filming), and having GG meet DD's DDU brothers is another indication of where their relationship was at. That's not a trivial thing.

d) GG's lack of chill during promo interviews.

I get the vibe that if they were in a relationship, GG was a lot more scared/nervous about it than DD was. He also had less experience with interviews and such. There are numerous moments where GG misunderstands, overreacts, or just acts weirdly during interviews that are hard to explain away.

- The "It's been a year" video, where DD points out that the camera is recording and GG balks at whatever he'd been saying. Cue the nervous laughter and whispered conversation between them. - The backwards pants interview question. - An interviewer asking him if being in a relationship means the end of his career (right after asking about his marriage plans--a question that made dd mad). - His weird denial of DD's waterfall story

In each case, something startles GG into a panicked silence. Then DD usually intervenes and so then GG has some nervous laughter.

Plainly, there's something he's afraid of being revealed in interviews. So much that he's seeing danger, even when it doesn't exist. Given the nature of the questions, we can see that the "thing" he's afraid of is

- him being in a relationship - something involving DD and him and a waterfall - and accidentally wearing someone else's clothes.

All involve DD. In all, DD is the one who relieves the panic and calms him down while smoothing over the interview.

It's not a leap to guess that he's in a relationship with DD that he's afraid people will find out. Sure, he'd want to hide a het relationship too, that makes sense. But then there's the pants question and the waterfall question. And the only way GG and DD's reaction to the question of whether being in a relationship would be the end of GG's career is if...GG and DD were in a relationship.

e) Hot pot.

Okay, this is where I start sounding crazy if I discuss this without prefacing with everything above ^^^. But the fact that their tastes in hot pot shifted over time to more align with each other is significant. I've read about the regional differences and how DD's sudden taste for spiciness could only really be attributable to GG, who's from an area with spicy hot pot.

This resonates with me, especially, because I was a hella picky eater when I met my wife. Like, embarrassingly picky. But then I met my wife, and she cooks and is a foodie and eventually, my palate just expanded. Now I'm a freaking foodie (and a vegetarian, like her), and our eating habits are pretty closely aligned.

Merging is real in longterm relationships. It looks like this. In my case, my wife demystified food for me with her cooking and likewise, it seems as if GG taught DD how to handle spicy stuff.

This wouldn't be significant on its own, but in conjunction with everything else *waves hands*...well, it's convincing to me.

In summary, it is blindingly obvious to me that they were a committed couple at some point after TU filmed and aired (when that commitment started is unclear, but I'm not gonna get into that here). Even after 227, it's clear that they're romantically together. I'm 100% convinced of this. Since I started drafting this, I've come across older mentions of (now gone) bts that just...there's no doubt. They weren't hiding it on set. They were just out there, exhausting everybody around them with their chaotic flirting/mating dances. It's insane and I love it.

4. DD and GG are still together.

Me: So I've been watching behind the scenes for The Untamed, and I think the two actors maybe had a thing? There's just...a lot going on there. My wife: Sounds gay. Me: I mean, some people seem convinced that they're still together because of shoes or something. That gets real out-there. But I definitely wouldn't be surprised if they had a thing during filming. My wife: (who only watched the show) I could see it. They had that chemistry.

(2 weeks later)

Me: Honey, I swear I sound crazy but I'm not. These two guys were totally together and I think they might still be together. My wife: Because of shoes? Me: I SWEAR I'M NOT CRAZY, HONEY, JUST BELIEVE ME My wife: Yes, dear. Their shoes make them gay. Me: *sobs*

When I first started dipping into things, I felt a great sadness watching older videos of them, because I'd heard that they weren't allowed to interact in public, that they probably didn't even talk to each other anymore, etc etc. YouTube's full of this, and the fans who say they're still together look, well, crazy.

It's easy to conclude they're not together anymore given that so much early evidence of their relationship is based on videos/audios. The bts, joint interviews, fan meetings, etc. We were spoiled with up-front and personal visuals of their dynamic. It's not a surprise that in the absence of that, most people just assume they don't talk or interact much anymore.

Not to mention, wandering in some years later, you get a massive dopamine hit with the bts and the promos and then there's a drop when you try to look for more recent stuff. When we could see it, their relationship seemed to alive. So real. So undeniable. But in the absence of that, the immediate instinct is to assume that lack of visibility = lack of existence.

But we have only ever seen a small slice of their lives, most of which has been selectively shown to us by them or by production companies. Both DD and GG have full lives when we're not around to see them. They each have their own career trajectories. They have vastly different hobbies and both of them have their own friend groups. We only get a glimpse of all of that, but that doesn't mean that's all there is. Especially now, when they're sharing fewer personal posts and China is cracking down on the entertainment industry.

No doubt, we only know the tiniest, most tailored portion of their personal lives these days. But back in 2019-2021, they were clearly together. Their relationship was clearly serious. They joke about shared financial decisions, get introduced to each other's on-screen and off-screen family, visit each other's set. Both of them seemed in it for the long haul.

Given that, I don't see why we should assume they have broken up just because we're years later and we don't get the joy of seeing them together anymore.

Don't get me wrong, I don't think a break-up is impossible. Couples break up. Even couples that have been together for a while. Even couples who adore each other and try to make things work. It happens.

But there's no reason to assume that they're broken up just because we haven't seen them together recently.

I do have a couple "reasons", but this evidence won't convince anybody who doesn't believe they were ever a couple. It's only when you accept that, yeah, these 2 BL actors are actually gay and in a long-term relationship, that this seems reasonable.

a) The bone necklace.

I'm pretty well certain that the ox-head necklace was a gift from GG. The timing of the bone necklace's appearance, plus DD's attachment to it (similar to his attachment to the ox-head necklace), makes it a decent guess that the bone necklace was also a gift from GG.

We can kinda guess at the meaning. I've only seen one clip where GG has called DD gouzaizai, so I don't know if that's an actual "thing" between them. (though it's not outside the realm of possibility that they are influenced by bjyx fandom).

In any case, the bone necklace is still around. Still being worn. That's notable to me.

b) They could end this ship if they wanted to.

They have both had other pairings shut down. The fandom wars between turtles and solos is intense and causes disruption, something neither of them need. The solo fanbases are huge and it'd be a no-brainer to jettison the CPFs if you want to cut down on the type of fandom upset that gets unwanted government attention.

But they haven't.

They could have the supertopics shut down. DD could avoid being anywhere near the number 3. They could both dive into a bush rather than be around the color yellow or a turtle. DD could take a video of himself melting down the bone necklace or giving it to a pretty woman. They could starve the fandom.

But they haven't.

They keep around their gay CP, despite not publicly interacting with each other in years. They take down articles about them breaking up, pull down hot searches about them with actresses, and continue to feed the fandom with candy.

Most recently, GG went to work late on the days DD was out sick. That's not even an intentionally thrown candy. That's just us noticing a couple taking care of each other. If they weren't together, then GG, whose team certainly knows about DD being sick, could have avoided doing anything that would make it seem like he was involved with DD during that time.

But he didn't. Either their teams don't care about turtles, which seems difficult to believe given the conflicts that have arisen within the fandoms, or the teams (notably, gg and dd) want to keep turtles around. At this point, years past the point the show is out, years past the time the two have even been seen together, there's no rational business reason to hold on to the turtles.

That's not neutral. They're not keeping turtles engaged for economic reasons. They're not keeping turtles engaged just for shits and grins (the joke has run a little long for that). They're keeping turtles around because they're getting something of value from having us around.

Honestly, I think having a huge contingent of cpf cheerleaders is probably comforting when they aren't allowed to express their feelings for each other publicly. It's probably weird and sometimes probably intrusive, like most stuff with fans, but they still have millions of people who embrace them as a couple when they live in a country that is hostile to their relationship. Who in that situation wouldn't want to keep that?

In sum, I had to get past the "too good to be true" hurdle. The automatic dismissal of BL fangirl fantasies. I mean, BLs often market to those fantasies, so a healthy dose of skepticism seems reasonable. I don't honestly blame people for dismissing it when they only have a passing familiarity with the whole thing.

It took a lot for me to see past that, and to see that this is the one case (that I'm aware of) where the fantasy is real. I think it's notable that this "fantasy" doesn't actually look like the fanservice fantasy often served up in BLs. I mean, ggdd have their moments, but they're also snippy, jealous, possessive, lewd, awkward, and just plain weird sometimes. They're real and that's messy and that makes it even more real.

In the next part of this little series, I'll talk more about the fanservice question, plus fanfic, and The Timeline. That post requires more editing, so it probably won't go out until next week.

Just remember it's all fake and nothing I say is true.