#also good if you need to put your email in something for stupid reasons but don't want to see anything they might send you

[sufficientlylargen]

A reminder that if your email is foo@bar.com, then mail sent to foo+whatever@bar.com will also come to you. This is really useful when you want to be able to filter messages from a particular service - if you have comcast, for example, you might tell them that your email is "foo+comcast@bar.com" and now it's easy for you to filter anything that comes from comcast, even if it comes from a sender that isn't obviously comcast

[abstractnaturaldisaster]

is it over now? (was it over then?)

part three

part four: say the one thing i've been wanting

Steve had been dreading actually talking about this with Robin. He hadn't wanted to put her in a position to feel like she had to come out or stop using him as a plus one to industry parties to fuel rumors. Even as he and Eddie pretty publicly dated Robin's agent and most tabloids still thought Robin and Steve were a couple some even going as far as insinuating Eddie was Steve's side piece or their third.

"Steve, you're kind of scaring me, what's going on?"

"Birdie, I'm only telling you this because I can't not anymore but I want you to know nothing is your fault and I literally don't need you to do anything. I just need to be able to talk to my best friend and in order to do that I kind of have to get through this uncomfortable part," Steve answered.

"Anything, Steve. Whatever you need," Robin said.

"Okay, so Eddie and I kind of broke up because Eddie assumed I was cheating on him with Nance when she came to visit earlier this year. He got really upset and kind of blocked me from any way of contacting him so there was no way to clear anything up after he left but he definitely assumed I was cheating on him and he wrote that fucking song and I just need to talk to you without leaving out this really huge massive reason why Eddie left and why I still feel like total shit," Steve rushed to cover the main points.

"Steve, hun," Nance comforted. She probably guessed something else was going on but had been understanding enough not to press Steve for more.

"Steve, I'm so sorry. This is all my fault," Robin started catastrophizing.

"Can you please stop saying my name. It's kind of freaking me out," Steve joked, "Robs, it's totally not your fault at all. It was a shitty situation I could have handled better and so could Eddie but there's really nothing to do about it know because I can't explain it to him and he clearly doesn't want me to so we are moving on, all right?" Steve attempted to keep the energy light.

"If that's what you want, sure babe," Robin said.

"I just want to stop going down Tik Tok rabbit holes of Eddie's stupid song without being able to complain to you about how fucking tired I am of not being able to do anything," Steve said, "and also I want so much ice cream and a really stupid TV marathon with my best girls and maybe roast Eddie's new song a little bit."

Nancy had already pulled up doordash and they were soon on their way to eating a smorgasbord of snacks and ice cream while watching reality TV and eventually dissolving into a karaoke session initially overdramatically singing along to Eddie's new single and ending with some old school Taylor (her version of course). Steve was feeling better than he had in a long time and started getting out of the fog he'd been in since Eddie had left.

Eventually, Steve started answering his agent's emails again and submitting tape for different roles. He'd gotten a part in a small indie film in Italy and Steve was pretty ready to take it. It was an interesting part, it was literally away from everyone he knew, the director was kind of weird and didn't let his cast use socials while filming and encouraged only phone calls and old school letters to really get into the period mindset. It was honestly kind of a perfect next project and it helped that the script was actually kind of great.

"As long as you aren't going because you're running away, Steve. You know I don't want you to leave and you shouldn't feel like you have to," Robin said as he was starting to pack his bags.

"I really like the project. It's a good script and I get to get out of my own head for a while. Kind of perfect honestly. The shoot is pretty short its only like four weeks so I won't be gone that long and you and Nancy can keep holing up in my apartment without me getting in the way!" Steve answered.

"You're never in the way, dingus," Robin nudged him and then brought him into a hug, "we'll just miss you kiddo."

"I'll miss you too, Bobbie. Now let me go so I can pack." Steve pulled away with a bigger smile than he'd had in weeks.

part five

@lololol-1234 @swimmingbirdrunningrock @zombiethingy (if you wanna be tagged in future parts feel free to comment! happy to add people)

[lawva-girl]

Historically.. We don't mix. pt. 2

Law x fem!Reader, College AU

Pt. 1

Notes: Sorry i took forever, i kinda forgot i even posted this... HERES PT 2!!! let me know about any ponderances or possibly any errors... i dont have a beta reader or anything.. ALSO i could not come up with a nickname for reader..... so in the chat rooms i put "Y:" for "You". PLEASE tell me suggestions i will go back and fix it :D

WC: 2526

Back at the dorm that Law and Bepo shared, there was no chatter. Law was simply laying in bed with his laptop open to 5 tabs, one for each of the classes he was taking. He was taking all history classes this semester, since his counselor told him to. He would definitely miss the bio information but he did like history. Scrolling through each class, he breezed through all of the syllabus quizzes. Once he felt satisfied, it was onto checking his email, with one catching his attention. 

“DIRE!! MAKE AN APPOINTMENT OR TEXT ME ITS EMERGENT!” The email title felt like a scam but he knew it was not, in fact it was a daily burden. The man who had sent it, his counselor and adoptive father, always communicated like this. After opening the email, he found himself irritated again, Cora had only wanted to remind him that classes start today. 

“How would I not know?” Law muttered to himself. Reading through the email, then deciding he had been too neglectful of the man Law opened up their chat.

L: I know it was the first day, I got to my first two classes on time.  C: Good!!! I miss you! <3  C: Any new friends?!  C: Do you like your professors?? I hand picked them :D  L: Hand picked? You are making me socialize on purpose.  C: Not true! Nico Robin is the smartest! She already had her masters by the time most have an associates!  L: The classes are fine. Bepo made a friend, her name is Perona. C: Oh! Mihawk’s kid! Good to know she’s here! Is his step-daughter here too? Maybe y/n?  L: Yes.  C: Oh! I heard she’s similar to you! Maybe you two can be friends or something?  L: How long did you have to think to come up with this plan of yours?  C: No idea what you are talking about…. L: Cora.  C: … C: Anyways, have you gotten all the textbooks you need?  C: I want to make sure you find them all!  C: It's my job, you know.  L: I still have two more classes to go to tomorrow, but i’ll be fine.  L: Thanks.  C: Anything for you! We should meet for lunch soon! I can make you salmon rice balls! Like when you were still a baby… remember? You loved my cooking! L: I did not. You should not be in a kitchen alone, Ill meet you on friday at 11.  L: Don’t start until i'm there. Please.  C: Okay !!!!! C: I'll see you then law! C: Cant wait ! C: Sleep tight <3<3<3 

Law closed his laptop, relaxing his shoulders. He glanced over and Bepo was already asleep. He kicked off his blanket and got up to go to the bathroom. After he finished his business, washing his hands like any good bio major, he strolled to the microwave area. He had only wanted water but he saw the picture of him holding a letter, standing next to Cora. Staring at it, he wondered why the giant had wanted him to socialize so much. It’s not like he never sees human faces, or stays inside all day everyday. He just liked being alone when he could, no one to ask him stupid questions. 

After finishing his water, Law went back to bed. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The two went through the rest of the week, meeting each other an embarrassing amount of times. Neither one had any reason to talk to the other, so they didn’t. Until Wednesday rolled around, and they were back in Nico Robin’s class. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Someone has it out for me. I know it for sure” You wrote in your journal, along with the date and class name. Looking at Law, like you had these past two days, made you realize it more. 

“I have pissed off whatever god actually exists and they want me to repent. There is no way that all four of my classes are naturally shared with Trafalgar.” You finish scribbling away in your journal, just in time. 

“Okay, pass forward the paper I handed out to you. This was just a fun assignment to see what areas we, as a class, are most interested in.” She spoke smoothly, with an even tone. It was almost like she didn’t care, or like she had done this 20 times. 

You heard some of your classmates groan and while you agreed, you thought it was inappropriate to voice that. Tapping a pen on the paper of your journal idly, you waited for more instructions. Even though your classmates weren't raised well, your father had done a fine job with you. You were nice, respectful, studious. Sure you are shy but it's not like it mattered. 

Why speak to people and risk being embarrassed if they don’t want to talk to you? 

“Okay, as I said before this class is based in groups and communication. Please tell one person about what you studied for this assignment.” Robin had said before sitting at her desk with a book in hand. 

Suddenly everyone was talking but you and one other person. 

“My assignment is on the Five years war. I chose it because of a coin flip, I found the sources in the library database.” Already you were irritated. Another interaction with the man who had no manners. 

“Hello. That is how you start a conversation, who raised you? Anyways, my assignment is on the First Crusade. I chose it because it was the first war I thought of-” “Really? The first? Liar.” He interrupted you, of course a man like him would. 

You squinted at him, before responding with “Not lying, I was watching a documentary on the pope a day before class, which made me think of all the holy wars. It's not polite to interrupt people.” 

“Okay. I think we have discussed enough.” “Fine.” You scoffed at him mentally, before turning back to face the front of the room. 

“Okay now, I want someone to tell me about their partner's work! This is worth participation, as a friendly reminder.” She smiled eerily 

You did not raise your hand, in fact you looked away. If you were called on you would end up having to lie, since stupid Trafalgar didn’t tell you anything about his assignment. 

“Okay, randomly generated, we will have Mr. Trafalgar, Mr. Reyes, and Ms. Churchill. In that order please.” “My partner researched the First Crusade, she told me that she learned about the context of the war. Specifically Pope Urban the second’s motivations for launching the crusade, who was mainly following the lead of the Byzantine emperor. She also learned about the cost of the war, not only economically but also what it did for the Pope’s approval rating.” Incredible. He pulled all that from his ass? Wasn’t he a double major? How long ago did he even learn that? How was he able to say it so confidently? He is actually smart?! Hold on, he could’ve seen the same documentary you did and just so happened to remember important stuff. But even then, he didn’t even hesitate, he was so confident, even with a professor like Nico Robin. 

“Very good, point earned. Mr. Reyes?”

As he relaxed into his chair, you couldn’t help but stare. His hair was sticking out, a bit unruly from his beanie. It was white with weird black spots on it, maybe a statement about faux animal fur? Could he be vegetarian or something? Maybe he likes to hunt? His sideburns went right into his weird facial hair, “should be shaved” was scribbled into your journal, along with “spots?” and of course “T is smart?”. You saw his black hair under his beanie and thought of your father, who would never slouch like the man in front of you was. 

“Okay good to hear. This wraps up our class for today, I’ll see you all on monday.” 

You started gathering your things, excited to go back to Perona. She promised she would have your favorite food ready for you as soon as your class ended. It was a little weird, but you two always were close. 

“Are you always the last to leave?” The sudden voice pulled you from your thoughts, and made you drop your pencil case. No pencils escaped but the case clunked right under whoever had just shocked you. Law, with no expression on his face, immediately thought of his giant  adoptive father; who was extremely clumsy.  

“No. Are you stalking me? I feel like the campus police or a trusted adult should know about this.” You looked up at him, not reaching for your case at all. 

“I’m not, somehow, we have the exact same class schedule. With the exception of my online class.” “That's crazy buddy… Will you grab my case?”

“You can’t get it yourself?” He scoffed and folded his arms. 

“I think the reason why I dropped it should be the one to get it for me, no?” You thought he looked childish, folding his arms like he just got told to go to his room. 

“Fine.” He reached down, grabbing the case and placing it on your desk, “even though you were closer to the floor… I'm sorry.” He looked away as he said it. Once again you thought he was childish. 

You found yourself staring again. This time you noticed his hands, the word ‘death’ tattooed on his fingers, and the heart on the back of his hand. Shocked to say the least.

“Holy shit.” Huh? You said that outloud? Maybe you weren’t nice. 

You looked up to see Law’s face, somewhere between shock and disgust.

“Oh uh.. I meant, holy shit your tattoos are cool. They look like they hurt.” Maybe you saved it, you really did mean it in admiration. 

“It was painful, but worth it. Bearable at times.” He looked at his hand and held it up between the two of you. Shocked that he held it up for display, you raised your eyebrows. Staring at the tattoo, you were about to reach out and hold his hand closer so you could get a better look at the line work. Then your thoughts were interrupted.

“I know we aren’t on the best terms, but you heard the professor. I think it would be a good idea to bite the bullet and partner up.” He said it so matter-of-factly you almost agreed without realizing you were lost. 

“Huh? Partner?” you blinked up at him. “Of course you weren’t paying attention. The collaborative presentation that you and another student must present on the 18th?” He sounded annoyed, but his face wasn’t telling. 

“Yes! Sorry I got lost in my thoughts, we might as well partner up. I don’t have anyone else in mind, so I can stick with you.” You finished packing, finally, and stood up. Swinging your bag onto your back, you held out your hand towards him. 

“Okay… What is that for?” He nodded down to your hand. 

“Give me your phone. I’ll put my email in. We can make a google slide and share it that way.” 

He paused, with a semi frown on his face then gave up. He put his phone in your hand, and watched intently as you typed in something. Then you returned his phone, much to his delight. 

“Bye then. Just do 5 slides on the First Crusade or whatever other war the pope has started.” He put both of his hands in his pocket as he casually strolled out, leaving you to the room. 

“Hey! We should at least pretend you won't be a dick this whole time! Don’t boss me around!” You realized that you had said that just a bit too loud for the circumstances. Maybe you weren’t nice. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Y: Okay! I just left class, do you have my salmon nigiri?  Y: You won't believe how good I was today. P: WHST  P: who are you?  P: The y/n i know would never ever say that.  P: Yes i do have it ready :) Y: I had to partner up with Him :/  Y: The strength  Y: Also he has finger tattoos?  Y: What the fuck.  P: You didn’t see them before?  Y: Sir traffy has been through it P: I wonder if hes like some ex-gang member? P: That is such a gang member thing to get tattooed P: Why aren’t you responding?  P: Helllllooooooo  P: y/n P: y/n P: ….

“Rona! You are literally crazy. I was walking over here, that's why I wasn’t responding.” You closed the door behind you, making sure to lock it. 

“Anyways! I’ve never seen you have such a strong reaction! To a guy no less, did he like to recite everything in the declaration of independence?” Perona called out to you while you entered and took off your shoes.

You walked over to the kitchen, where she wasdoing some dishes. Tossing your bag on the couch, then taking a seat at the bar that was connected to the kitchen. “If he did that I would’ve proposed on the spot… He just is kinda smart? It’s freaky! One second he’s brushing me off and not wanting to talk to me at all, the next he's explaining the cause of the First Crusade? Well… Kinda.” Perona turned with two plates in hand, and took a seat next to you. She placed the plate of sushi in front of you, “Well honestly i'm not surprised… Bepo says he is always studying.” 

“You talk about him with Bepo? Perona…” you made a disappointed face at her as you pulled your plate closer to you. “Noooo it’s all kosher! Bepo just offers up info about everyone he knows. I think he just doesn’t have a filter or whatever.”

“Yeah…” you took a piece of nigiri and dipped it, then ate it. As you chewed and swallowed you thought of your dad, “Do you think your dad would come visit us here?” 

“Hmmm only if your dad forced him to. I can picture it now ‘don’t you miss our girls?’ ‘Yes.’ ‘Then lets go! You pay and ill bring the beer!’ ‘beer isn’t allowed on a plane shanks’ or something like that…” Perona tried her best but didn’t really get the overall attitude of your dads. You decided not to comment and just take another bite. 

“Do I get to know why you asked?” Perona said, food in her mouth.

“Traffy, as you call him, has hair as dark as Mihawk’s. It made me think of him today…”

“Sigmund Frued would have a lot to say to you right now.” “No he wouldn't, he’s dead.” 

“Not for long…” “What the fuck?” You both burst out in laughter at the same time, something you had only ever done with your sister. 

After dinner it was off to bed, except you weren’t actually sleeping. Your laptop was open on your lap, on the google slides page. The document was created, named, and shared to Traffy. It wasn’t the most well-mannered thing, but you decided that nicknames meant you’re friends. Your sister desperately wanted you to have friends, and this would make her think you had them. You didn’t like the deception, if you could call it that, but it's not like you were gonna go out and get real friends. 

You started typing away, filling out 3 slides with information and pictures before deciding to get actual sleep. 

[crguang]

not fuckboy Kafka being a fuckboy on accident, that is honesty kind of funny, but I am still running…towards her.

ok but Kafka in the firefly animation was kind of funny for some reason. she was also really hot in the animation but Elio definitely told her to be there, so she’s just sitting on a space while waiting for something and she’s just drinking. I was looking through firefly’s story and there was nothing about Kafka 😔 except for when she’s recruited and only mentioned as “the woman” there was stuff abt silver wolf and blade, so obviously everything abt her is going to be plot relevant when she shows up very soon in the main story.

Also Kafka at the interrogation scene was so silly. Like they took her jacket, her contacts and wiped off her lipstick for what? her back and her shoulders do be looking fine tho people like me are why there’s dress codes in school and her eyes are gorgeous, like she looks so much softer when you can see her pupils, she’s so pretty.

your post abt how Kafka slows her speaking was very interesting and I’d like to know how her va was directed for those scenes, and I definitely need to rewatch the interrogation again I’ll def get distracted

Speaking of her voice actor, Cheryl texiera was so good on the white night cover. Her belting was amazing. Definitely feeding my headcanons for my university au. In aural class you have to sing notes (from my research) to prove that you can tell the difference or smth, and I just think it’s be funny that reader would be so mad at Kafka for having perfect pitch and having a good voice and generally just being good. I’ll write whenever my actual uni isn’t kicking my ass.

-🌠

fuckboy kafka’s lowkey a loser when you think about it… that’ll make more sense in the next part but the unnecessary things she does as proof that she cares are so silly. firefly’s trailer was so good i remember losing my mind when kafka was shown at the end because it was so unexpected 😭 but she did look gorgeoussss, my timeline was just profile pictures of this for a while hdjdhdj. she needs to put that glass down she’s always gotta be drinking something like let’s start carrying a water bottle baby (i love exaggerating her unhealthy habits). i also love that the trailer confirmed kafka was the first SH recruited even tho i already knew like yess prove me right hoyo

TRUST ME KAFKA’S COMING BACK 2.7. like she is just trust me she’ll be back so soon beautiful as ever i just know it…

i love the interrogation scene of the luofu i think it’s my favourite, i remember squealing when she walked in the frame without her coat like i was a victorian man seeing a woman’s ankles for the first time— at the time i hadnt checked anything about her so when i saw her without her coat i realized that she was mostly wearing it to look good (she cut holes into it to pass her arms through them instead of it being over the shoulders like himeko bc she wears fancy long sleeves… just unnecessary?3!4?) then i read her character description in the archives and it said she loved collecting coats i was like “i knew it…”

SHE DOES LOOK SO MUCH SOFTER RAHHHHHH. she’s much less intimidating and i love it so bad because we were seeing her without her defenses for the first time + we got to see her full design (it’s my favourite). they took her jacket and contacts/wiped her makeup cause she actually got arrested so they likely needed information like eye color and fingerprints etc, plus she was hiding three grenades, two rifles and a sword like i’d confiscate that stupid ass coat too. i think the funniest part is that she went back for it afterwards 😭

ALSO YES THAT WHITE NIGHT HIGH NOTE CHANGED MY LIFEEEEE LIKE HSR IDOL/BAND AU WHEN???? i need that university au im gonna email your profs to cut you some slack so you can write because im itching just at the idea of an academic rivals story with her… hope your classes aren’t too stressful tho!

[songmingisthighs]

Ignominy

introduction pt. i | pt. ii | pt. iii

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ch. lxviii - hearing

hybrid!san × human!reader

buy me coffee ?

everyone wants to belong, it's basic human need to connect with people around them. what happens when you're responsible for someone who belongs to two worlds but at the same time belongs to neither ? worst part is, what happens when it's your ex ?

Seconds felt like hours, minutes felt like days, and hours felt like weeks.

You sat in front of your laptop with so much anxiety and uncertainty. It had probably been only a couple hours but it fely like forever and it didn't felt good at all. It didn't help that you couldn't sleep much the other day not just because of the damn email looming in your mind but also because of your stupid ankle that decided it wanted to have a big fucking rave with all the pulsing and the heat that caused the area to twitch. So you were anxiety riddled and in pain and to be quite honest, a lot pissed that neither San nor your work friends were answering your text. You wanted to ask about what happened the other day and also if any one of them knew what the email was about but of course you didn't get any answer. It was like being kept in the dark about something major that was affecting everything and everyone.

The email was so sudden and you were worried if it had anything to do with what was happening at High Breed. Who would've guessed that the day you took a day off from dealing with your ankle, some major shit happened to the office and then you suddenly got a hearing from HR. All you could do at that moment was simply to convince yourself that you would be okay and that it was just protocol. Nothing big, nothing to worry about.

As soon as the clock chimed 9, you saw that the Head of HR and the General Manager got into the meeting room with their camera on and San in attendance with his camera off. Your heart beats harshly against your chest in worry, noticing how the meeting was attended by high ranking staffs so there was a chance that the issue at hand that somehow involved you was an absolute big one. But despite your gut screaming that something was wrong, you sucked the anxiety in and just think positive thoughts. Maybe they wanted to tell you that you passed your probation early and the reason it involved high ranking officials are because you worked directly with the CEO's son so they took things seriously.

Here's to wishful thinking.

"Good morning, everybody," you greeted, smiling brightly to mask the nerves bubbling in the pit of your stomach. Unfortunately your greeting was met with silence, not even a single sound of acknowledgement. Chills ran down your spine from dread and embarrassment, the situation just became much much worse just from that exchange and your confidence almost slipped completely away. Luckily, the Head of HR spoke up but in a very uninterested tone, "Good morning ladies and gentlemen, we will begin our disciplinary hearing momentarily," the words she said made your eyebrows furrow in utter confusion, "Excuse me, disciplinary hearing for what exactly?" You cut her off which was completely ignored as she kept rambling on about who was present in the meeting. Next to speak was the General Manager who cleared his throat and tipped his glasses down slightly, "If you had been more patient, miss, we would've explained that we conducted this meeting to inform you that as of today, you are put on a temporary unpaid administrative leave until the issue you have caused be resolved."

If your eyebrows were furrowed before, now they're knitted so tight a sweater had formed. "Whoah, I don't understand, what issue did I cause??" You asked, obviously not knowing what they were talking about. "Okay, we'll bite," the General Manager said which you took notice of and didn't feel great about because the mannerism indicated that they didn't believe you about something. "It has come to our attention that you have been sharing personal information about Mr. Choi San to the media which is a complete breach of your contract as Mr. Choi San's personal assistant," he said. You waved your hands in front of the camera to stop the guy from talking more because the confusion wasn't resolved, it doubled. "Okay, I really don't know what you're talking about because I've never talked to the media before, I never shared my boss's personal information, not even with my friends," after the words left your mouth, you realized how flimsy of an excuse that was and those people could've easily misunderstood you as making up excuses or just simply disregard you. Then again, they could take your explanation masked as a flimsy excuse as suspicious behaviour despite you only telling the truth.

"As crude as it sounds, we do not care about what you talk about with your friends outside the office but this particular action has affected the company negatively especially since it affected Mr. Choi San," then the Head of HR clicked on something from her screen and presented some pictures, "Now, miss, do you recognize these?" Your eyes barely scanned through the file but you immediately took notice of it. "It's my company database account," you answered, still not understanding what their point was. "What about this?" She then showed the next picture and you saw your account information at the top and a bunch of numbers and letters listed under it and next to them are other numbers that look like specific dates. "My account and random numbers? I'm not sure," by now you have a bit of an attitude and it's mostly because of the fact that you had just been accused of something and you didn't appreciate it.

With a raise of his eyebrows, the General Manager leaned forward in his seat and sighed, "This, Miss (y/l/n), is proof that your account has been accessing important data and files from the company database that detailed Mr. Choi's private information including his medical report which if it turns out to be true, is a direct violation of the privacy law and you can be penalized," he stated firmly. "Wait," you tried to interject, wanting a moment to take the revelation in and made sense of the situation. Unfortunately, the General Manager kept going on about what you supposedly did and which files you accessed. Words thrown at you floated in your brain and none of them stuck, you couldn't process the explanation as your brain was trying to remember when and why you opened those files. Sure, some of the files that were on the list you actually accessed yourself but you remembered that it was under the direction of other superior officers. Files like San's most recent medical record that San himself requested to be sent to his family physician, or files like the company's pharmaceutical records that include sales, testing, production dates and locations, issue report, etc. that was sent to you by the lab supervisor for you to compile so San won't have a hard time looking them over. But other things like employee attendance, employee login timestamps and information, company finance report, patents, MFDS clearance, legal reports, and much more files that were under the record list, you couldn't remember ever accessing nor do you even know how and where to access them. Despite the defence bubbling in your head, your were frozen, you couldn't say the words you wanted to say because at that moment, you were being bombarded by two people while San was watching.

Why wasn't he saying anything?

"...That being said and with the evidence stacked against you, the company has decided, as we said earlier, to put you in unpaid administrative leave until the issue is resolved," the Head of HR said. As it seemed like they were about to conclude the meeting, your body reacted as quickly as it could and you called out to them. "Hey, wait!" thankfully, it seemed like it managed to catch their attention momentarily, "Don't I get to defend myself first? This is a lot to take in and you can't just make a decision for yourselves," it was hard for you to keep your voice stable because all you want to do was scream at them for accusing you of doing something so ridiculous but you knew full well that if you let your emotions get the best of you, they wouldn't take you seriously. The General Manager sighed before answering you, "Yes, in a less dire situation, we would've let you defend yourself, but as this issue has become public and seemingly uncontrollable, we have to take immediate action to prevent further issues from arising." To make matters worse, the Head of HR just HAD to comment in her faux low voice that you were pretty sure she wanted you to hear. "You should have thought of that before doing something so reckless," and before you could've said something, she called out to San, "Is there anything you wish to add, Mr. Choi?"

Almost embarrassingly quickly, your eyes flit to San's account and you saw him opening his mic. Seconds pass awfully slow as you waited, hoping for him to defend you, telling both people who seemingly had it against you that the company shouldn't be rash, that they should take a moment to assess the situation better before putting you on leave and treating you like a criminal. You believed that he would come to your aid because he knew you wouldn't have done that to him. After all, you have been covering for his ass and you have done nothing but a good job in the office as his assistant. Not to mention the fact that you let him fuck you whenever he wants which shouldn't be the main reason but it kinda felt like it should. So why would he assume that you even wanted to hurt him?

But all hopes you had were lost when your screen suddenly returned to your browser, showing that the meeting has ended without any more addition. Without San saying anything to defend you.

"He... Ended the meeting..." you muttered to yourself in disbelief. He didn't even say anything, he didn't even have the decency to say something to you, something comforting or just something that acknowledge the fact that you were in that situation and it was such a shit situation. He just dismissed you like that.

Your chest tightened and your hands shook. Emotions mix together, emotions you can't even discern, and emotions you've never felt before.

Standing up from your desk, the first thing you thought of was to get a glass of water to calm yourself down. Your injured ankle forced you to limp to the kitchen and you suddenly chuckle to yourself, thinking about how ridiculous your luck was for giving you an injury and putting you in such a difficult and absurd situation. You try to make sense of things but at the same time you didn't want to think about it just yet, you didn't want to have to deal with the issue as quickly but how could you not when it affects you greatly? Does this mean you can't go to work for the foreseeable future? Does this mean you're replaced? You accepted the job in the first place because you wanted something to do and now you were being denied of your own decision. With this happening, do you want to stay? Can you stay? You're willing to be everyone else knows about this issue so it's safe to assume that even if you did come back to work, say you were proven not guilty which was the truth in the first place, you will be a pariah. Those who knew about the details and believed that you were the kind of human being who would do such a thing would not treat you nicely. And apparently, one of those people is the boss who you've been fucking. Working for him would be different after this issue no matter the truth. It was too much for you to handle alone and you didn't want to have to handle it alone. But what could you have done? Contact your friends just because you're in a shit position? Is that how you want to treat your friends?

The water you poured for yourself felt heavy like lead down your throat and your body couldn't help but want to expel it. You coughed and coughed the liquid out and while doing so, you accidentally knocked your glass over and it shattered. In between fits of coughs and blurry vision, you saw the mess you just made and suddenly the pain in your chest doubled.

What are you going to do now?

taglist :

@90s-belladonna @kodzukein @phenomenalgirl9 @miaatiny @shinotani @jayb17 @dreamlesswonder86 @mayonnaisehoeshit @bbymatz @yunhorights @tinybinnie @blaaiissee @yunhobug @kwanisms @yoongiigolden @kpopnightingale @maddiebabyxoxo @dea-nimus @meowmeowminnie @x-bluee @itsbeeble @gxlden-bxbyy @charreddonuts @x-woozi @jwnghyuns @marvelous-imagines-for-all @baguette-atiny @jessi-outdated @dogsongy @kirooz @ateezourstars @memorymonster @yoonguurt @atinytinaa @naiify @cecedrake2217 @spooo00oky @flamingi @thesolarplanetarysystem @hijeongguk @hongjoong-lovebot @linhyyboo12 @leeknowsnothing @knucklesdeepmingi @doom-fics @yesv01

[fanthropology]

The Secret of Exercising

I'm writing this because people who like to exercise have lied to you, and the time for New Year's Resolutions is coming up. You may feel socially pressured to make yet another resolution about exercising that you will not fulfill, which you'll then feel bad about.

1) exercising is like finding a good therapist. You may have to try more than one type to find one you think isn't stupid.

2) the "endorphins" you're supposed to get from exercising don't show up until 6-8 weeks in. You're shooting to hit that mark, not exercise forever. You will probably hate it and think it is stupid until then.

3) Exercise is easier if you combine it with something you have been procrastinating but know you should do. I read and answer emails from my desk bike. I'm also writing this post. You might also try reading a book, listening to that podcast you meant to catch up on, or watching that TV show that everyone's been talking about that you can't bring yourself to start.

4) You will find yourself making excuses to not exercise, because you're still tired this morning, feel like you're coming down with a cold, or simply do not have time. And you will think "I don't have the available willpower to accomplish this, maybe I should give up and take another crack at exercising when life is less stressful." Maybe you simply just feel too depressed to exercise. All of those are valid feelings.

However, the voice whispering to you that they're a good reason to not exercise on this particular day (or perhaps ever), that's the devil talking to you, my friend. All of these problems, assuming you're not experiencing a serious medical difficulty, can be improved through exercise. The devil (or whatever evil character you'd like to put this on), doesn't want you to feel better. You can feel better, and the devil is right there, tell you not to. Are you going to let the devil win today? If you want to survive the horrors for another day (or, for me, delay the effects of the debilitating seasonal depression I experience for just one more goddamn day on the endless journey to mid-March when I start to get enough sun again), you gotta get yourself some exercise. Light exercise is one achievable thing you can do to fight back. You don't need willpower to exercise, a commitment to justice, pettiness, or being angry at someone else (or life in general), is an effective substitute.

5) If you're worried about proving someone right who's told you to exercise, don't worry. Anyone who genuinely likes exercise is probably just happy to have you join the world of exercise, as it's a dumb little club that wants others to have endorphins. Anyone who is telling you to exercise for bad reasons can still have their day ruined by telling them any of the above secrets of exercise. You can have your exercise and not capitulate to assholes.

[yourgamemasterthewhiterabbit]

Gremlin update supplemental September 12th 2024

It's September and it was getting really cool at night so I was under the impression I could take my air conditioner out for the year...

Wrong.

It's over 30 degrees in here and I was already sweating because of the pain I am in.

Had to put the stupid thing back in with every joint in my hands and wrists swollen to all fuck.

I got a call from my landlord today because they somehow already misplaced my registration e-mail and were trying to let me know that if they needed entry in an emergency or otherwise, they're only willing to e-mail me about it for warning, even being told I don't check my email even daily, let alone often enough for an emergency.

Really hoping this isn't step one of them pulling some bullshit.

Still trying to watch through all the old x-men cartoons and movies at once while recovering from full body gout and the dermatomayositis.

Mostly, I wake up with slightly sore knees and wrists and hands that are swollen to all fuck. I do not know what my hands think they are doing, but my left wrist was so swollen this morning I kept getting pins and needles in my fingers.

The blister on the back of my finger is an inflated blister again. It seems to fluctuate with hydration levels, but it isn't bothering me.

I am eager to get back to doing some serious cleaning and organizing again. At least I have been doing laundry to get that all caught up with the machine, but from the moment I was like "okay this step is done and it looks presentable so I can chill for a bit now" I have been horribly sick with autoimmune attack and gout and that doesn't feel very fucking much like taking a break... And yet... And yet I am chomping at the bit to be able to just do something fucking useful with my body because it has been uncooperative for so long.

At least i don't have to do laundry in the sink anymore.

I shrank the list of "life improvement purchases" down to 1 batch under 500, and a secondary batch for good storage options I haven't gotten yet, but probably will once I downsize more [also under 500]. The rest I may never get -at least not living here- because there isn't room between the cabinets for most counter top dishwashers, and other things like that. So, really under one month's rent to fix every problem I have that can be fixed by throwing money at it, including all my pants being threadbare and beyond any reasonable repair. Without dipping into savings for that or my winter groceries.

And yeah, I was getting a kick out of repairing the same 3-4 pairs of fast fashion pants for over 10 years and simply refusing to ever buy more... But they were getting threadbare enough that too much flexing any muscle or moving around would tear them back open along new lines, and yes, if my hands were working I could keep repairing them and I could keep wearing stretch leggings under them so my ass doesn't show, but at some point you are just walking around in full werewolf aesthetic because it is obvious you have ripped out of your clothes like 20+ times and it just starts to become absurd not to buy new clothes.

I got to buy men's jeans this time. No they are not cut to fit my body but I can sew. I mean I am still going to do some elaborate patching of the other 4 pairs of pants, but at this point those other pants pretty much ARE the patches for the next set I ruin.

I was doing so good last time until i had to lift my cart into the house. I still plan on making a ramp but that's going to take time.

I am so fucking tired and my nerves are raw from being in screaming pain all over my body for about a month on end now... But I have been enjoying many fried proteins and home-cut fries.

I'm recovering, really, just not nearly as fast as I used to and it makes me cranky and I am sorry. I promise I am still fun and chill T~T

[queenofgraveyards]

ooooo yk i kinda want them to have an argument that starts off as a joke cause ivy is just trying to fuck with him but it goes wrong. something like he makes a comment about her never putting her stuff away and she just makes a snide remark back, just joking cause she knows her husband is never really mad at her. but it just happens to rub him the wrong way and he’s like idk why you have to make something out of nothing with your mean comments all the time, like why can’t you be happy we have a perfectly healthy relationship and we don’t need to start that toxic shit even as a joke. and ivy gets hurt cause shes like ??? how long has he thought that??? and also?? he’s kinda right im being toxic by trying to start something out of nothing bc we just have a normal good life together??? but also i was just joking???? and yeah boom

HOLY SHIT like…that is SO real and that would be the only way they’d argue bc maybe he’s just had a shitty day at work and he misses her being at work with him now so he’s kinda just like 🥴 everyone in this office is STUPID and I hate meetings and I hate not having my favourite person here to have lunch with and send stupid emails to throughout the day and then he comes home and maybe ivy is just…like she’s not a big emoter anyway we all know this so shes just like hi what’s up and then she’s kind of left shit everywhere and h for some reason is just like …this is stupid and he’ll say it nicely ofc bc he loves her but like what is SO wrong with just putting the mug in the dishwasher sweetheart? and ivy you know she’s the black cat to h’s golden retriever so she just snaps back like sorry I forgot I live in a fucking museum and h is just …🧍🏻‍♂️ and ivy doesn’t even blink and he gets hurt like he knows he’s a neat freak but it’s literally easier to put the mug IN the dishwasher than to leave it out and he’s just like you know you don’t have to be defensive all the time and then it just starts spiralling and it’s such a stupid thing to argue about!!!! but they’re both stubborn and they won’t back down and ivys a Scorpio ofc she fights back and her words strike to kill when she’s mad and well harry’s a fucking AQUARIUS do u think HES going to talk about it???

[jealousraisin]

Jonothan&His Career

Bits and pieces of how he got to where he is now, his career and just kind of why he is the way he is. Backstory sort of i guess. <3

Not currently but before the charlie era he COULD NOT talk to girls he was ridiculously nervous around them . Partially the reason he stayed quiet/awkward for so long at the beginning of his and charlie’s friendship/relationship.

His mum and family would manage every single aspect of his life from the moment he was born, everyday was a performance, just doing what he was told to/expected of him. His mum especially with her being the one who put him into modelling, he felt really suffocated.

When he was younger (like under 10 years old) he would constantly express things he wanted to do or learn. Go over to his friends house and play, watch the new movie his classmates were talking about, you know kid things. But he was always rejected and told he had to study more, he had a photoshoot, 'its not proper', don't be stupid, don't waste your time' etc. At some point he stopped asking, he doesn't remember when. Now when he sees something that gets his interest he catches himself before he can get too excited in the idea of following that interest, he doesn't really understand why that happens (he forgor 💀) (he'll remember later guys 🫶)

Part of the reason he wanted to move to the States, to get some breathing room.

Will not lie this dude had no sense of self, felt like he was just something to be manipulated and guided, no wants no needs just comply ‘it’s all in your best interest’ ??? what interest who am i outside of this?

This guy was honestly very quickly sliding into suicidal/heavily depressed territory with that kind of thinking, it was all very subconscious for him so he really didn't understand why he was feeling the way he did I mean he 'has a pretty good life, right?' which is why when he started to understand this feeling of suffocation he pushed so hard to move away under the guise of “expanding his career internationally” because he felt it was the only other option aside from,,,that. And he knew his family wouldn’t agree to him stopping what they’ve worked on his entire life.

Took a lot, and i mean a lot of convincing to get his family to agree. When he first came to the US his family had everything set up so he would continue doing what he was doing back in France. Initially he was happy with just being physically away from their overbearing “guidance”. But slowly over time he would start to ignore emails, messages and calls in favour of hanging out with his new found friend.

Becoming friends with Charlie at that time helped him start to develop a sense of self outside of his lifelong career, which helped a lot with his overall happiness.

Charlie is a big advocate of pursuing anything and everything that piques her interest, no shame about it and that extends to the interests of her friends and family so when she noticed him shying away from things he clearly has an interest in she was not going to have that. So in her own unspoken way she started helping him engage in those things. He didn't notice that's what she was doing until he was already starting to do things on his own, but neither of them will say anything about that until a while into their relationship.

He was really considering dropping modelling all together once he got to the US but with developing his own wants, needs and likes he felt that his career didn’t feel as overbearing. Also Charlie would talk about fashion so passionately he started to see another angle to what he has been doing his entire life, he decided to tell her about his work and she reacted so excitedly about how she has ‘sooooo many ideas i need someone to help me out’

They ended up working on a project together to post on her blog and it was one of the first shoots he did where he felt himself start to ease up and do what feels natural not what was directed, While charlie gave him a guide she really trusted the guy to have better knowledge than her in the modelling aspect.

That shoot ended up in the sights of his family and they had quite a few words sent his way. Especially considering that they did NOT approve of this shoot happening, they voiced their concerns about how he could be ruining his image and so on blah blah blah. But this is when his personality started to switch up to his current (true) self so he didn’t agree for the sake of agreeing with some of the things they had to say. ‘It’s not like he wasn’t still doing the gigs they were managing for him anyways what do they care?’ This event set off him looking for a manager he picked rather than his parents. Took a while to find a new manager but he found someone who will still make sure he doesn’t fuck up but isn’t dealing with every single aspect of his life, just professional.

His manager is a woman older than him who actually used to be a model herself, she ended up quitting modelling when she got married and went in the pursuit of other things. Though she did return to the fashion world looking to be a manager/personal assistant, Her and jonothan found each other and they clicked. She does have her work cut out for her as his career progresses because he starts to become more unhinged/independent as time goes on.

Starting his own PERSONAL social media separate from his professional ones (that he did not get to manage btw) was a big step in the right direction, started to get into posting his thoughts and things he enjoys.

Charlie introduced him to rhythm games and the idol genre. Got hooked on love live and ensemble stars. Later on would get into project sekai when that launched. He now owns a lot of bits and pieces of merch. (idk much about love live or enstars but ik he would <3). Now he actively engages with this interest, it's one of the most important ones he's found.

His apartment felt so liberating when he first moved in, but after a little while it felt lonely. That's when he ended up adopting a stray he would always talk to on his way to school, this cat is the most affectionate little guy you could find. She would always follow him up to a certain point of his route to and from school and she was pretty eager to finally come home with him. Over time Jonothan would spoil the shit out of this cat.

He still has a lot to unlearn and teach himself but now things aren't bad. Him and his mum aren't as tense as when he first left but he just can't seem to find it in himself to forgive or relax around her and have that mother son relationship like things didn't happen the way they did. He wishes it was all different but his newfound family and friends gives him comfort that it doesn't all have to be this way forever, it can be better.

[twotonedsuicide]

My small yap session bc I'm bored

So spacehey just hit 1 million users and liek ,, it feels so weird 2 me

I joined the site 2 years ago when it only had around 480k - 500k users so I've seen a good chunk of the sites history unfold right by me

It's just such an amazing accomplishment I'm around 2 see happen and liek ,, it's nice that I've been on the site 4 so long ,, yet it makes me a bit more sad abt my plans on quitting / leaving it 4 a bit

My plan was 2 leave the site 4 as long as I wanted bc yeah it's a good site but the ppl on it r either super sensitive, super edgy or just not active

I get wanting 2 b a good person and positive influence ,, but obv there is such a thing as toxic positivity

I've also seen ppl harass users just 4 liking a simple movie or having a trait a particular person doesn't like

It's a good site and good idea but the ppl make it insufferable 2 b on daily

Another small issue I have w/ the site is the mod team

Ppl don't like the mods and it's mostly 4 good reasons

Yeah the mods have been cleaning up the gore spam and other nasty stuff off the site but they also unfairly ban/suspend ppl 4 little reason if any at all

I've almost got my acc on there suspended bc some1 reported my acc

I was confused y until a mod IMed me on there

Apparently some1 didn't like how I had a razor blade as my cursor and the graphic I added as a joke

(the graphic I was using below:)

I've had that graphic on my profile 4 months before that person actually reported it and the mods thought it was completely fine

I 1st put it on my profile way back in early March so it was considered fine 4 5 months

That's what I don't like abt the mods

They will get pressed over little graphics on some1s page but the second some1 starts spamming actual gore it'll take them at least half a hour 2 get rid of the account

They will also ban you the second you piss them off / get involved in the smallest of drama

I'm friends w/ some1 named gia who has been banned over 50 times on spacehey just 4 popping up and making a new acc

He only got involved in drama once b4 his acc got terminated

And every time he just pops up on the site and tries 2 use it like any1 else his accs get suspended

Ik it's against TOS 2 not make multiple accs but banning him over some petty drama that happened way back in April is just a bit unnecessary

He doesn't even interact w/ the ppl who were involved w/ that situation anymore

Every1 but the mods moved on

So now he has 2 use burner emails and a variety of display names and such just 2 b able 2 stay on the site

I get trying 2 minimize the problematic content on your site but just straight up banning ppl for a small situation that happened 3 months ago isn't exactly the best way 2 do things imo

There's a block button 4 a reason

If you don't like some1 on the site just block them and move on there's no need 4 the mods 2 ban both parties 4 what's essentially no good reason

That reminds me of another issue I have w/ some of the ppl on spacehey

I've had ppl get mad at me and question y i blocked random well known users on the site

I've had angry IMs from ppl asking me abt some small stuff I was involved in

There's just what seems 2 b cult followings around some of the popular users on the site

Like I'm srry I blocked them but it's my choice

If some1 doesn't like me I will just block and move on bc starting up something over something so insignificant is stupid

I've also gotten blocked by some of the popular users 4 no reason

If some1 blocks me 4 no reason I'll just block them back

I fear it's just the best thing 2 do

I won't go and make an alt acc just 2 ask them y they blocked me

It's their choice and that's that

I also have an issue w/ the rumors on the site

I've seen so much misinformation/rumors spread around abt ppl and I'm sick of it

If I see something abt some1 and it's that bad I'll just str8 up go and ask them like "hey is what X is saying abt u true ?"

I won't go around spreading it unless it's confirmed or there's too much evidence surrounding that particular info 4 it 2 b false

I've personally seen rumors abt me such as that I'm a tcc (true crime community) member and that I'm an awfully rude person

The tcc rumor only popped up when I asked a certain bad person who's part of that community abt some rumor floating around abt them

Yes I admit I do like some crime cases but I'm not a part of the community

I've only interacted w/ ppl from that community a handful of times and I only know abt some cases

In order 2 b part of a community u have 2 b committed 2 it , active in it and u have 2 enjoy the community

I do not like tcc since from what I've seen abt it , it's a community that idolizes and worships horrible ppl who committed heinous activities

I would not enjoy being part of a space like that

Also I'm only rude 2 ppl if they're rude 2 me

I believe in treat others how u want 2 b treated

Maybe if they were actually a good person who treated others kindly I wouldn't b such a shit face 2 them

Anyways that's it of my yap ses I'm gonna go back 2 my important reblogging

[autumn-applepie]

I think it's baffling that my mother doesn't want me to get disrespected and always stand my ground but when I stand my ground against her or a family member I'm "being ungrateful"

I feel a little stupid for ranting this much but hhh ig putting myself on blast is what keeps me sane so I'm gonna rant down here sorry it's going to be log I just yap a lot ignore this lol </3

my mom is very pushy and a perfectionist, failure and error is not allowed, and whenever there's a problem she gets angry, screams, insults and throws things. I messed something in my new University's registration and instead of paying no taxes, we ended up having to pay a 400 euros tax. My mom was screaming like shit, I thought it was completely normal that we had to pay them but then we checked and we figured I messed an information cuz the explanation wasn't so clear on the site and she got mad saying that she was supposed to do it and I can't do anything alone, that I'm a child, I'm pushy and I always rush things when I did that registration quite calmly and double checked and was absolutely sure.

I just messed something, and tbh 400 euros of taxes for the whole year is not even that much, considering the higher taxes you can possibly pay in that uni is over 30,000 euros. And we have a whole month to fix this we just gotta wait for the secretary to reach us back to our email. And when we made the first payment (the admission tax of 120 euros, not the uni tax), she obsessively tried to search for every single paper possible, while I tried to show her how it takes a bit for the payment to show and she got heated up and doubled down on "I'm just showing you how you not fuck your life up" like wtf?? And ofc I got mad telling her to calm down cuz there was no reason to twist the knife in the wound and she got so offended saying I have no right to talk back to her and disrespect her. That I'll never go anywhere in life with that attitude and that when someone older than me talks I need to shut up and listen and that I want to ruin my life I can do that outside of the family. Even when she started mocking me instead of giving me actual counterargument (like, literally she would mimic my words mockingly and go "bleh bleh bleh gne gne gne wah wah wah wah!", even disrespectfully mimicking spasms while doing it) she would go "I'm making fun of you because you never let me talk so I'm not going to listen to you" wha????

This always happens also with my grandmother and my aunt. Long story short, my grandma is very old and is starting to struggle to walk. She uses a cane and always needs a hand. Usually is my aunt who does that, however, my aunt is very dismissive and superficial. Whenever we go out, I always end up being the one caring for my grandma because my aunt doesn't even care to stay close to her enough, making her risk to fall to the ground multiple times. Now, my grandmother is not a good person either, like at all. She's the main source of verbal abuse, fatphobic, homophobic, and racist "jokes" in the whole family. But still she's like. Almost 90 years old. And tbh she doesn't deserve to like. Fall to the ground because my aunt cares more about herself than her own old mother. I had to call out my aunt many times like "can't you please stay behind her instead of having your head in the clouds??" and my aunt gets always so offended and my mom always goes "she's your aunt, and she's older than you. You have to give respect no matter what" and I obviously told her that respect is a two way street no matter the age and no matter if it is a relative or not (also because we're talking about GRANDMA FALLING TO THE GROUND because of my aunt not caring), and her response was "Life doesn't work like that. Respect should always be given, you shouldn't be entitled to have that respect back" huh??????? I don't??? think that's how respect work????

Idk she always leaves me so spent every time cuz wtf

[emdotcom]

Hi, I'm a known hater -- we continue. Yo, when companies have me verify my identity after I just sign in regularly, on the same phone/pc I have been using for the last 3 years? & Then, I go to the email, & they're emailed me a tasty little code, right? A little 548419-action, yeag? That's fine. It makes my blood boil a little louder, each time, but that's fine. But, then there's those companies that WON'T let you put the code in one box, oh, no-no-no! You need to put each one into different boxes, to dissuade AI, prolly -- as if it matters, because half of the sites just automatically put you in the next box, anyways, when you type a number, which means it's not disuiding most bots. & Then, you might think, in the instances where the boxes are seperate, but codex to follow each other, that that must be good, right? It's about as good as a single text box, just with a wasteful layer on top that splices it for no acrual reason. 'cept, no! 'cause for some reason, Twitch.tv, which I just logged into 6 hours ago, decided I didn't look enough like me to pass for me, so now I need to prove my identity. So, I go do that, & I copy the code, because nobody fucking types them, anyways -- which, again, if you can code a robot to find, copy, & paste codes, any website that lets you paste the code in is a cakewalk for said bot, & Twitch is a cake type-o-site -- & take it back to the text box. Only, I misclick a teeny bit, aiming for the paste box, & have entered a number. But, I caught that, so I just move the current selection to the first box, & paste it there. For some reason, it disregards that, & pastes onto the next box, even though i KNOW I just went out of my way to select the correct one -- saw it highlighted with the little blippy | l | l that confirms you're typing & everything! Well, that's not so bad, I got most of the numbers in front of me, I'll just go type it, right? WRONG! Dipshit.tv ain't coded for mobile inputs, & when I type, it skips the next box in the order entirely, meaning I need to type a number, it shoots me forwards 2x, then I need to click back & select the actual box I want to be in. But, oh, hey, Emerald, that's not a problem, is it? That's easy-peasy shit -- just click after each number. Except, sorry, wrong again! Because this is one of those dumb-fuck sites that Also enters the code every time you have typed into the last box, & trying to type the previous numbers hit that box enough that Twitch decided I MUST be a fake Emerald, so they say "Whoopsy-doopsy! Sorry, you smooth piece of shit, you used our verify system too many times, so now we're locking you out! Come back later & try again!"

When the fuck is later? No time is specificied. A minute? An hour? In 3 years? You're a robot -- give me a fucking number, at least "in a few minutes" or something. Second off, you DUMB Fuck. I'm locked out because You are coded in a stupid way that compounded into a snowball that means my success rate at he world's shittiest, simplest bot-proofing was low the second I decided to look at Twitch on my phone. Why is technology dumb as fuck, as we drown in it? Go shit in your hands, & then clap.

[hardworlders]

Mandala Volume I Hardworlder | Book 1 - The Office Job Chapter 4: Death Threats

Did you put ketamine in the Coffee-Mate™?

The office park, four glass buildings brushed with sad oaks and box hedges, waited for him like jail time. There was nothing around but the same old paved over prairie land stacked with strip malls, chain restaurants, parking lots, clustered office buildings, and upper-middle-class housing units cranked out like thirty caliber rounds. The land was as smooth as if it had been created the same moment as the highway and the sky slid across it all without resistance. It made him miss the beaches of Thailand and the clubs of Ibiza. This kind of America felt like quicksand.

Paul had stopped by a liquor store on the way and poured a quarter of the whiskey into a coke with a few sips missing. He shoved the bottle into his shoulder bag and walked towards the tallest building. An armed guard watched him from outside the front door. They had beefed up security after some guy came in with a gun. He had waved it around in the lobby crying about something, then drove home and shot a few cars on the highway. He was watching porn in his living room when the cops broke down the door. Everyone at work was cracking jokes about it for a month until they sent out that email. "Can you blame him?" "A living legend." "I got one of his signed qualities. Think I'm gonna frame it."

Paul felt he was being watched and looked around. His Uber passed a black Mercedes SUV parked near the edge of the lot. The driver had that ex-military or current cop look to him. He glanced at Paul and then back down at his lap.

"Oh, what the fuck is this?" Paul muttered. After he was wanded, he saw another cop-looking guy in the lobby who made eye contact over a magazine. Paul looked away and got in the elevator.

"I'll just go in my office, tell them to fuck off and come back with a warrant. Then when they're gone, I'll get lost." The elevator climbed. Did they need a warrant to search his office? Had one of the workers called in a tip or something? Was there even anything in his office? Stupid! Probably just some corporate guys. The reports must have finally set off alarms higher up. Whatever. He could get another job.

He stepped out of the elevator and saw his senior manager, Todd, standing between the reception area and the call center floor with a man he had never seen. The man was shorter than Todd but filled out his suit like the god damned terminator. He looked like something out of an old mob movie. Short slick hair, sharp brown eyes, charcoal suit, and a striped wallpaper tie. Paul turned to go around the edge of the cubicles toward his office in the back, hoping they hadn't seen him.

"Paul," Todd called. Shit. Paul looked around for a bit like no one would ever have a reason to call his name before making eye contact and walking over.

"Hey, did you call the attendance line?" Todd asked.

"Uh, no, I had kind of a rough morning."

"Ok, no problem. I'll take care of it. This is Robert. Mind if we go talk in your office?"

Paul shook Robert's hand awkwardly, then led them both across the floor. He glanced around and saw Jeremy, his manager, watching like they were taking Paul to be executed and he was next. Paul glared but couldn't really blame him. This didn't seem like something three grand a month could take care of.

They all went into his office. Robert sat like the terminator too.

"Ok, Robert's with NFG." Paul almost ran right then. Nations First Guard was the security company brought on after the incident. They had good relations with law enforcement and hired a bunch of veterans. They were also the only reason Paul had been thinking of changing locations. Should have known this setup was too good to last.

"Sir, I'll cut right to it. We've received some threats against your person, which we have reason to believe could be legitimate."

"What? Like from the employees? What kind of threats?"

"Some kind of retaliation. Can you think of anyone that would feel like you wronged them in some way?"

"No. I'm just a supervisor. I've never even fired anyone," Paul said. Todd shifted in his seat.

"Well, we're going to be keeping an eye out,” Robert said. “I'm going to leave you my info and if you think of anything, or if anyone tries to contact you, just let me know." He got up, handed out cards, shook hands, everyone said goodbye, and he was gone. Todd turned to Paul with his hands up like he expected a freak out.

"Now before you get all excited, Robert told me they think it might be just some guy off his meds. Maybe related to that other guy. I think he said something about an incel website."

"Who the fuck called NFG?" Paul had forgotten himself out of panic, but Todd ignored it.

"I don't know, Paul, now just calm down. I don't think anyone called them, but this is serious. They said they might have to escalate the case to the cops."

Paul clenched his teeth together.

The case. Fuck me, I'm in a god damned file somewhere now. Notes being added. My picture in the corner. This Paul character, I wanna know everything about him.

"So, what? Am I just supposed to stay here for the rest of the day, waiting to get blown up or shot?"

"No, Christ Paul! Nothing like that is going to happen. They're all over the place and this guy is probably just some nut. They did say they would prefer it if you stayed in the building.”

“So I’m just supposed to sit here waiting to die!"

"No one's gonna die, Paul! They said it's just emails right now. Probably some kid in a basement in another state."

"How am I supposed to work like this? I can't leave?"

"They said they'd prefer if you didn't. Look, there's no reason to panic. Just sit and watch some videos or something."

"What?!"

"Well, I don't expect you to do any metrics or one-on-ones given the circumstances. But I did tell Robert I could get you to stay the rest of the day. It didn't look good for me when you came in late, I'll say that!" Todd had his hands on his hips and was red in the face. Paul wished he was in the mood to laugh.

"All right. Fuck!"

Todd wiped the sweat off his forehead and left. Paul heard him murmuring to some people outside in a reassuring tone.

He sat down and took out his phone. How was he going to get out of here?

<continue>

[stevengrant-my-beloved]

(he love me) he give me all this money I Part 1 [18+]

Series Masterlist

summary: A brief interaction with a catfish on a sugar daddy website leads to something quite unexpected and suddenly you're on the radar of genius tech billionaire Nathan Bateman, and honestly, you don't mind the attention.

chapter warnings: just a whole bunch of swearing honestly, catfishing (?), mentions of substance use (alcohol)

a/n: okay so, i've been listening to qveen herby's sugar daddy A LOT lately and if u couldn't tell from the title, that song basically inspired this fic. i really hope y'all like it 'cause honestly idek what this is, i just pumped out 2k words while running on zero sleep , so.. let me know what u think

also just a note about the texts in this fic

> Texts like these are from Nathan. [bold and italicized]

> texts like these are from you [italicized]

Here's the thing about getting (responsibly) piss drunk with a group of friends who are all enablers and won't ever discourage you from doing stupid things on a whim, as much as it sounds like an epically bad idea, sometimes (read: very rarely) it yields positive results.

Like that one time, fueled by copious amounts of liquid courage and the encouragement of your drunk friends, drunk you had sent that presentation you'd drafted to your then crush (who might have also been an coworker at the time), basically to try and convince him that you would be a good partner, and you'd ended up getting a really adorable email back saying that he was also interested and definitely would love to go on a date sometime.

That relationship had lasted a solid 6 months (which was really great considering your track record), and it had been good run, ended amicably even. You and your now ex co-worker were still on good terms, so yeah, all in all, a positive experience.

Then there was that one time you and your friends had gotten drunk and, for some goddamn reason, had gathered all the unsolicited dick pics you'd received over the years (because again, for some goddamn reason, you still had them in your DMs) and filmed your reactions to each and every dick pic (without revealing the senders, of course), commenting on the quality of the images (lighting, angles, etc.) while also rating each dick. Sober you had then used that footage, edited it to perfection, included digital renderings of said dick pics to add to the video (because as NSFW as your channel could get, you didn't need to put actual dicks in your videos) and uploaded it to your channel.

Currently, it was your most popular video, and the one that had quite literally made you famous overnight. A bunch of commentary and reaction channels were suddenly talking about you, and you'd even gotten messages from a lot of creators you looked up to, commending you on your hilarious content and hoping to see more.

Okay so, it really was just those two instances where you'd gotten something good out of heavily drinking.

That would change soon, though, because your next drunken adventure with your friends would change your life in ways you would have never imagined (in the best way possible).

---

"I can't believe I let you assholes talk me into this-" you groan as you scroll through the dozens of messages you'd received over the past few hours on your freshly created dating profile.

"Hey, this was your idea babe, we were just being loving and supportive-"

"By encouraging me to sign up on secret benefits dot com?" you ask, glaring at your friend over the rim of your coffee mug.

For context, you'd just woken up with a killer headache (as you do every weekend, because you and your friends have zero control and always, always get drunk off your asses on the weekend) to your phone absolutely blowing up on your nightstand from notification after notification, alerting you of a new 'Daddy' that wanted to get to know you better.

Apparently drunk you had thought it would be a real fun idea to sign up to become a sugar baby, and your equally drunk friends had agreed (because of course they did).

You had begrudgingly opened some of the messages that you'd received, and most of them were pretty tame, surprisingly.

"Yeah, I'm deleting this," you mumble, clicking through the page to find the deactivation option, not before taking a few minutes to admire your own profile (drunk you had a made successful attempt at creating an enticing profile for a sugar baby, it seems).

Once you get your fill of your own pictures, you head to the deactivation page, only to be greeted with a little pop up message that says-

"Oh, what the fuck, I have to keep my profile up for a whole week?" you yell.

Your friends all groan out some variation of "keep your fucking voice down" from various parts of your bedroom, and you turn to the one friend who somehow wasn't hungover at all despite how much you all had to drink the night before.

"It says I can only delete my profile after 7 days," you say, holding up your phone so your friend could see.

"Can't you just delete the app off of your phone?"

"I could...but ugh, I don't just want my pictures up on some app like this- I need to delete my account."

"So just wait out the 7 day period, maybe chat it up with some rich men and see if they'll give you their money, I don't know," your friend shrugs, before turning back to their phone.

Huh.

"Yeah, fuck it," you mumble, going back to scrolling through the messages on SecretBenefits, looking at the profiles of all the older men you'd matched with.

Maybe this would make a fun video...

---

It takes you an hour to set everything up, but eventually you're ready to film what's sure to be your next best video "Trying to Find a Sugar Daddy (Not Clickbait)".

"Hello everyone, I hope you're all having a great day," you say, waving at the camera. "Welcome back to my channel, this of course is another episode of Girls Just Wanna Have Funds, Specifically This Girl, This Girl Needs Money and She Needs It Now."

You laugh at your own stupid intro, before continuing. "So, the other day, my friends and I got together for drinks, and yeah I'm sure you can guess where this is going, we got drunk, and I ended up creating a profile on SecretBenefits, and I'm stuck with it for the next 7 days, so here we are," you chuckle as you hold up your phone, checking to see if the screen recording was still working.

"I'm not really trying to find a sugar daddy, this is purely for entertainment," you say before leaning close and whispering, "but if some rich zaddy wants to send me some money I wouldn't be opposed, ya know? Alright, so drunk me apparently already swiped on a bunch of potential sugar daddies, but I think we can do better so I'm going to try and get more matches. Obviously we're going to censor everyone's faces just in case anyone's actual father is on this app and you're watching, like, I really don't want to be involved in any family drama like that."

You set out to swipe on interesting looking profiles, commenting on just how big of a range of potential daddies this app had to offer.

"Okay, so that's not just an older man, that's literally a grandad, nope- wait, this guy included a picture of himself at his own wedding, oh my fucking god- 'looking for something discreet' he says- my guy maybe don't post your wedding pictures for anyone to find? Like I could easily track down this man's wife and snitch on him. Wait should I do that?" you ask, looking at the camera. "Comment down below if I should snitch on Matthew, 52."

You continue swiping through more profiles, occasionally snorting at the few messages that popped up from different matches.

"Okay, Dave wants to know if we've been on any other sites looking for an SD... SD? Sugar daddy? They have codes now?" you laugh incredulously. "I'm going to say...'no I haven't'."

Just as you're about to call it a day on swiping and focus on the matches you'd gotten so far, your eyes zero in on the next profile that shows up, and-

"There is no fucking way Nathan Bateman is on this app, this has to be a catfish situation right? Right?"

You look up at the camera. "I'm going to swipe right. It's probably, most definitely, not him, but if it is..." you trail off, looking off to the side with your eyebrows raised high.

It's a match!

Funnily enough, you'd actually made a video on Nathan Bateman, CEO and Founder of BlueBook. The video itself had been a Top 10 style video, where you'd rated various billionaires based on their looks and wealth, while also ranking them based on how willing you'd be to ignore their massive ego and wealth to be able to fuck them. Other notable figures on the list had been Tony Stark, Bruce Wayne and Lex Luthor (who'd ranked dead last) to name a few.

You phone pings with a new message from 'Nathan Bateman'.

NB: Hey.

hii :) quick question are you really the Nathan Bateman ??

NB: Yes, I am.

NB: Any matches?

"Imposter Bateman is asking me if I've got any other matches." You wink at the camera with a cheeky smile before typing out-

nope, just you :))

NB: I'll send u money if u send me a picture. Topless.

"Oh wow, he's getting right into it," you scoff at the camera. "No seriously, how stupid does this person think people are, because this sure as hell isn't Bateman 'cause the only pictures he has are like ones you could find online, like they're all paparazzi shots from before he moved to his private island or wherever the hell he fucked off to, and the few selfies I see here look edited so..."

You tap your chin a couple of times, before snapping your fingers

"I'm actually looking to be a sugar baby, without the sugar," you say out loud as you type out your response to Imposter Bateman, before tapping on another message thread.

"James just texted 'you look delicious', bye- okay, he looks kinda cute though, hm."

Just as you're about to type a reply, you get a notification from Imposter Bateman, and it has you gasping.

"Oh- oh my god, he just- I just got absolutely lambasted."

Imposter Bateman had replied to your earlier message about wanting to be a sugar baby without the sugar by saying-

NB: You just want my money

NB: You're not even that hot

You're still wheezing from laughing so hard when you look at your phone again to see that Imposter Bateman had deleted the conversation and blocked you.

"You guys see this?" you ask, holding your phone to the camera, even though you know you're going to be including the screen recording in post.

"Nathan Bateman, I don't know if you'll ever see this but, ouch dude. That was so harsh, you just told me I'm not hot," you pout at the camera, faking incredible sadness before laughing out loud again.

"Also, 'you just want my money'? Uh, yeah, that's what every sugar baby is here for, the app is literally called secret benefits? The benefit for me being money?" you say, shaking your head.

You go through more messages from other sugar daddies (15 to be exact), reading out their texts and formulating responses while talking to your camera, making sure to include as many funny quips you can think of before filming your outro.

"Alright guys, that's it for this video. I hope y'all have a great day and Daddy Bateman if you're watching, make up for my heartbreak by sending me eighteen hundred dollars?" you plead at the camera. "Please?"

---

The seven day wait period goes by pretty quickly, and once you deactivate your SecretBenefits account, you upload your final edited video, which had been sitting unpublished on your account for the past five days. It was short, only 10 minutes long, and it hadn't taken you a lot of time to edit, but you'd decided to post it after you'd taken down the account because the last thing you needed was for your fans to sign up for the app and try and find your profile.

The response to your video was amazing, but you expected nothing less from your loyal subscribers.

What you didn't expect though, was for them to take to Twitter and flood Bateman's mentions, asking him how he could possibly think you weren't hot. They even managed to get the hashtags #imposterbateman and #daddybateman on the trending page for a day.

And you certainly didn't expect to hear from the man himself, because the very next day, you get an Instagram notification saying @thenathanbateman_official is following you, followed by a text notification that read-

> Send me your IBAN

You blink at your phone for a few seconds before typing up a reply.

> ??

> well hello to you too mr. bateman

> Yeah hi, I need your IBAN

> can't you just hack into my shit and find out?

> why're u asking

> I can, but I thought I'd be polite and ask first.

Just as you're about to reply, you get a notification from your mobile banking app, which almost makes you chuck your phone at the wall.

You've received $1800.00 from Nathan Bateman

What the fuck?

> u watched my video???

> Videos. Saw the one where you ranked me too.

> no way- fr ?? 😭

> Fr.

> wow ummmm i hope u liked them ?? idk what to say

> Your videos are pretty funny . Liked the dick pic one.

> everyone likes that one yea

A few moments pass, and you think maybe that will be the end of that. You move to put your phone back down, but it pings with a new notification.

> Imposter Bateman was fucking blind.

> You're really hot.

welp, lemme know what y'all think-

[michelle-is-writing]

Family Matters, Greg House

Word count: 1.7k~

In the time I’ve worked at Princeton-Plainsboro teaching hospital, some might say I'm the bubbly doctor in our group. Although I don’t know how true this might be, I do know everyone can agree I'm definitely more bubbly than doctor Gregory House, but that's for another day to discuss. I'm usually the one people send in to try and cheer up patients. Because of this, I mostly work in the pediatrics ward where young, sick children are. Sometimes, I have an easy time talking to the kids and making them happier, and sometimes, I don't; usually, when I'm upset, I have a hard time.

Right now, I'm having a very difficult time.

A young New Jersey girl at the age of 11 had developed mastoiditis, an infection that affects the mastoid bone above the ear and is typically caused by a middle ear infection. Usually, this all clears up, but sadly, this infection had grown to be so bad that the girl ended up with only twenty-three percent of her hearing left in the one ear. Although this is the case, I'm not having a hard time because of the girl's loss of hearing, no.

I have my own problems at the moment.

Since I'm working in the children's ward, I don't get to see Wilson or Greg as much as I want to. Despite Greg's tendency to be an asshole, he's still my best friend and not to mention that Wilson is the kind of guy anyone can talk to about anything. However, our schedules are all different, so, as I said: we don't get to see each other that often.

At least they're still in my life though. For my family, I can’t say the same. Recently, I've just lost the closest person to me in my family; although it wasn’t through death, but through immaturity and childishness. Because of this, all of my other family members have closed me out as well, causing me to be alone. With all of my friends busy and my family shutting me out, I have no one to talk to or enjoy time with... no one. I can't even get a boyfriend for Christ's sake, and it's not like the guy I have my eyes on actually likes me back. Greg is the type of guy you can easily fall in love with, yet at the same, you really shouldn't.

"Doctor (y/n)," the young girl by the name of Jessie states. Putting all my focus back on her, I remind myself not become distracted anymore today. This isn’t the first time, unfortunately. "Will my hearing ever return?"

I smile sadly at her and shake my head. "I'm sorry, Jessie," I tell her. "Your hearing in that ear won't return, but it's not a bad thing!" I assure her. She smiles in relief. "We can always get you a hearing aid, and that will help get your hearing back to normal again, but the wait might be a little long," I explain. "Is that okay with you?"

She nods her head at my question. "I'm okay with that, doctor (Y/n)," Jessie tells me, "I'll have my family help me until then," she smiles brightly. "You can always look up to your family, right?" She states, confident in her words.

Tears slowly rising to my eyes at the thought, I nod and quickly blink them away. "That's right," I tell her, still smiling. "And don't you ever forget it," looking toward her parents, I nod my head. "The discharge nurse will be here in a few moments with the papers. If you'll excuse me..."

Without another word, I quickly leave the room and walk as fast as I can to the nearest empty room. I prefer going to James’ office instead, but it's two floors away, and I don't want any awkward elevator trips. So, before I have a mental breakdown in the middle of the hallway, I find an unlocked janitorial closet before walking in and closing the door behind me, ultimately sliding down the hardwood door once it's shut.

Sitting on the cold, tile floor, I begin sobbing as quiet as I can, my hand covering my mouth. I already had my family drama on my mind all day, but for that girl to unintentionally throw it back in my face? That was the frosting on top of the already leaning, three-layer cake.

Tears stream down my cheeks like raindrops as I cry my heart out. I can tell my cheeks are red by the sensation of heat I currently feel on them; my hands feel it too. I'm crying so hard my chest begins to heave up and down as if I were having a panic attack. Oh God, I can't have a panic attack. Not here, not now.

Behind me, I feel two knocks on the door, causing me to halt. The only problem is: the knock wasn't above me, it was where my back is against the door. Remind you, I'm currently sitting on the floor. The only way someone can knock that low is if there is a midget behind the door there or someone used something like a cane... it's Greg.

Slowly moving up a little, I shakily open the door and let the grey haired man in, watching as he looks at me with pity. I've never seen the confident doctor House look like this with anyone. It's like a... a totally different Greg.

Sitting down beside me against the door, Greg drops his cane beside him as he sighs and wraps his arm around me before gently tugging my body close to his. Shocked, I tense up, tears no longer pouring out of my eyes. Greg never comforts anyone like this. He always makes fun of them or says something that many people take offense to, but he never... he never cares. He always brushes it off his shoulder, yet for some reason, he seems like he actually cares this time.

"What's wrong?" He asks, his voice deep as usual with no emotion.

I wait a few seconds before lying. "Nothing important," I tell him, my voice wavering from my scattered emotions.

Pulling me back to face him, Greg looks me in the eye before sighing again. "I know you've been crying by the wet tears on your cheeks, slight puffiness, and redness to your eyes, and fast-paced breathing - and I don’t even have to be a doctor to notice that," he breaks down my current state, lifting an eyebrow. "Now, are you going to begrudgingly tell me what's wrong or do I need to stay in here with you until you finally give in to all my unrelenting sexiness."

His comment makes me laugh, causing a grimace of a smile to fall on House's lips. Out of all of us, I've been the only one to do that. I've been the only one to break Greg's stone exterior and interior. Plus, It doesn't help that I like Greg romantically. I like the fact that he's confident and witty; he's not afraid to be himself. Although, he can still be quite an ass to others, but to me, he’s always been nothing but kind. Even when I first started working here, he was still patient and sweet - a rare sight to everyone else. It used to hurt me to think he’ll never feel the same way as me, but I’ve gotten so used to that fact that it doesn’t even bother me anymore.

"It's just... my family," I explain, Greg pushing my head back onto his shoulder as he holds me. At this point, I'm not shocked by anything he does. The infamous doctor could be high for all I know. He probably took a few Vicodin tablets before coming down here now that I think of it.

"They've completely... shut me out," I explain, shrugging as I rest my hand on his shoulder. "They never talk to me anymore, they've blocked me in any way of even trying to talk to them. My cousin just sent me an email last night telling me that I didn't need to contact them anymore as they no longer wanted me in their lives," I close my eyes, tears rolling down my cheeks. "Plus, I wish I could work with you guys again," I take a breath before saying the next thing. "I miss you."

A few seconds of silence pass before Greg leans down to my face level. Opening my eyes, I'm greeted by his own sapphire orbs, watching as he continually inches forward until his lips plant themselves on mine. Our eyes close at the same time in response to the touch of our lips, and they stay that way too. With my heart beating fast and a different fire in my cheeks, I instantly respond to his kiss while placing my hands on the sides of his face, feeling his hands attach themselves to my hips as I do so. We kiss until we have to breathe, both of us pulling apart simultaneously.

"They don't deserve you," Greg tells me, a little out of breath. "You are wonderful; a decent and kind human being, inside and out," he takes a small pause, flashing his blue eyes down to mine. "I never thought I’d say this, but… because of you, I think maybe not everyone is a horrible person and that maybe I can be a bit nicer a time or two," he then smiles at me, kissing me once more. "You have made me feel love believe it or not."

Smiling, I lean up to kiss his forehead before sitting back down and resting my head against his chest, my eyes cast upon him as he looks down at me. "You've also made me feel love," I confess to him, my voice shy. "I've grown to love you as well. You and your sarcastic comments and witty comebacks and your insults to apparent stupid people," for once, he laughs, making me grin. "I can't help but love it all."

After a few moments, Greg speaks up. "I know I can't be your entire family," he murmurs, holding me close. "But I can try to be your... your..." He draws on, clearly trying to come up with an appointed title for himself. After a few seconds, I giggle and cut him off.

"Boyfriend?" I ask, making him roll his eyes.

"I was going to say significant other," he argues, looking over to me. "The term boyfriend is so, well, childish," he complains, making me giggle.

Leaning closer, I peck his lips. "Good thing you have a childish mind," I tease him, pressing my lips to his one more time before he responds to my comment with something horrible or completely inappropriate. It is Doctor House we’re talking about, after all.

[atlafan]

okay, I know a lot of you are starting college/university this year, so here are some things yall need to know/understand (I’m a first year academic advisor FYI):

no one is going to hold your hand. Many places consider you a legitimate adult at this point. Nothing will be spelled out for you completely.

GOOGLE IS A THING! I know when you don’t know something your instinct is to email someone, but often times if you Google the name of your college + whatever you have a question about, you can find the answer that way

Please remember that your professors/advisor are people too! A lot of us don’t check email on the weekends or after certain business hours. Please don’t ask to meet them on a weekend, or during the noon lunch hour. We need to rest too.

Your professors aren’t going to email you about every little thing, they’re just not. Some might, but most won’t. READ YOUR SYLLABUS! CHECK YOUR COURSE PAGES! As far as buying books? Your college bookstore website should have a search engine for looking up what you need for each class. Start there, then you can go onto Amazon, eBay, chegg, etc to find the best deal. If it’s a gen ed, just rent. If it’s a book for a major course, buy it. And listen, I know we all hate amazon, but but amazon student is amazing, less expensive than a regular amazon account, and you can save way more on books and supplies.

JOIN CLUBS, GO TO EVENTS! You’re not going to make friends sitting alone in your dorm room. I know it seems scary to venture out, but trust me, getting involved in campus activities (even if you’re commuting) is the best way to meet people and not feel alone.

UTILIZE CAMPUS RESOURCES!! Have an IEP or 504 plan? GO TO YOUR CAMPUS ACCESSABILITY SERVICES! They can give you what you need. Get tutoring right away, SEE YOUR ADVISOR, go to the counseling center if you’re not feeling well mentally!! All of this stuff is included in your tuition, use it!

CHECK YOUR FUCKING SCHOOL EMAIL!! I know yall like to text, but please. Don’t email using your personal email (gmail, iCloud, yahoo), USE YOUR SCHOOL EMAIL! Read things through carefully. Departments on campus email you for a reason.

REGISTER FOR CLASSES ON TIME!! At some point you’ll meet with your advisor to discuss classes for the following semester, and they will give you a registration date. WAKE UP EARLY ON THAT DATE AND FUCKING REGISTER! Then you don’t have to worry about getting into the classes you need.

Exercise. Get out of your rooms. Even if it’s just a walk to get some fresh air. Your diet/eating habits are going to change drastically. Please don’t skip meals. Make sure you’re eating. I was a very unhealthy student and would barely eat. PLEASE EAT!

GO TO CLASS AND YOU WILL PASS! Your parents/guardians won’t be there to nag you. It’s on you to get into a routine and schedule. I know it’s tempting to skip, but unless you’re sick, don’t skip class. You or your parents are paying for that class. And if you fail, you have to retake it, which means paying for it again, and paying for an extra class to make up for the credits you’re missing.

CHECK YOUR BILLS! If you’re paying for school on your own, please check your bills. Financial offices will put holds on your accounts if you can’t pay. STAY AWAY FROM PRIVATE LOANS! You’ll be paying off the interest for the rest of your life, it’s not worth it. Most schools will help you set up a payment plan. I recommend calling those offices directly as opposed to emailing, you’ll get more direct help.

Save your money for doing laundry.

Don’t pack a ton of shit. You can go home and swap out clothes at some point.

Get a lanyard for your student ID, idc if you think it makes you look stupid. If you lose your ID it can cost a lot of $$$ to replace it.

Never leave your room without your key. Taking a shower? Great! Your roommate left and locked the door behind them. Good thing you had your key in your shower caddy!

SHOWER SHOES! Get a cheap pair of flip flops to wear in the shower. Girls, yall are gross. I can’t tell you how many times there was hair all over the shower, or a used tampon flung into the corner. Please clean up after yourselves. Don’t leave makeup in the sink. Bathrooms are a COMMUNITY SPACE, be courteous.

If you want to go out and party, that’s fine, but keep your priorities straight. Are you at school to party and drink, or are you there to get an education and eventually a job?

GO TO CAREER SERVICES! They can help you with your resume, and do mock interviews.

GO TO YOUR ALUMNI OFFICE! Alums love helping students find internships and jobs. The people in that office can help you get in contact with the them.

This is all I can think of for now, but for the love of god, heed my warnings. College can be a wonderful time to learn and grow as a person, but it can also be really depressing and tough. Seek help, get involved, and go to class. Good luck! 💕