#also for anyone who’s reading this in the last two days I’ve been so bored

[astrum-aureus]

As someone who was both a tumblr user and a Reddit user for years I’m sitting here like seeing other Reddit users migrating here because of the blackout and. Man

I mean welcome first of all second of all 💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥 (the horrors)

Rip u/wyverneuphoria you were a bitch (me talking to me here. I was just so prone to acting like a damn bitch on Reddit)

[afteraftercare]

BEHIND THE BOOKSHELVES

librarian!billie x student!oc

Authors note: i decided to split this into two parts because i’ve been so busy and can’t write the second part to save my life. i promise y’all it’ll be out before monday trustttt. anyways this look ass but whatever smh

Warnings: not proof read

clara was extremely obsessed with reading. it was absolutely hands down her favorite hobby ever. if she was bored, she’d read. sad? read. stressed out? read. 

something about escaping her reality through these stories made her feel something. so when she went to her new college in LA she immediately caught the librarians eye. 

billie had only been working at the school for two years now but wouldn’t be able to tell you one students name off the top of her head. that was before clara came along.

clara would come into the library everyday, sometimes even multiple times. clara was also really recognizable. while most college students would walk around campus in big baggy shirts and grey sweats, clara really made a statement. 

each day she would get dressed up in the cutest sweaters and short mini skirts with her same pair of doc martens. she looked like she belonged in the library.

billie genuinely never payed attention to anyone who came and went. no one ever cared to talk to billie, even ask for help finding a book. people would just come in and get her to scan their novels and walk out without saying a word. not clara though. 

“hi, sorry can you help me?” the girl asked. billie looked up from her desk. immediately locking eyes with the girl. billie furrowed her eyebrows, no one ever talked to her. “yeah of course.” billie replied with a smile on her face. “uhm i’m new here, a freshman actually, and i was wondering if you could help me find the romance section?” clara asked politely. 

her brown honey eyes only had innocence in them. she batted her eyelashes at billie like a little puppy. billie smiled and got up from her chair. “yeah, it’s right over here.” she began to guide her. 

clara followed behind. her skirt swaying back and forth as she walked. “its kind of hidden in the back for some reason. the people who made the layout in here must of been some bitter person since it’s so hidden. no one even comes back here most of the time because nobody even knows it exist.” billie explains with a chuckle. “wow really?” clara asked, interest filling her tone. billie looked back at here. “yeah.. well.. here you go. if you ever need anything let me know.” billie reminded her. clara flashed her one last smile and went to serching. she definitely kept the words if you ever need anything let me know in mind. 

almost everyday she would come into the library and ask billie a question. any other time billie would probably have gotten aggravated. but with clara she never minded. 

clara came in today. immediately greeting billie with a heart warming smile. that smile lighting up billie’s entire day. “hi bils!” clara spoke. the nickname immediately making billie’s face go red. she loved how friendly clara was. its like they had know each other their whole lives. clara went back on to the romance section leaving billie back at her desk alone. 

clara soon came over with a book in her hand. she rested her arms on billie’s desk, sliding the book to her. “hey billie can you tell me what this book is about? the description is pretty vague…” clara asked. billie happily obliged. 

billie was also a huge reader herself so most of the time if someone brought up a book she knew it. 

she took the book and read the cover. she immediately knew what book this was. “its kind of a generic enemies to lovers book. its a lesbian book too, if you know, your into that. its basically just a story where these two girls are forced to be camp counselors together who hate each other but then fall in love.” billie explains. clara nods. “sounds good enough.” billie took the book and scanned it. “i’ll see you again tomorrow bils.” clara said. a little seduction in her tone. it made billie shiver a little. 

clara knew what she was doing. she was extremely interested in billie. everything about her made her feel all kind of things. the way she dressed, like, a librarian but way hotter. the way billie’s glasses fit on her and made her already pretty blue eyes even more pretty. how billie would help her. something about it just made her want her more. so everything clara was doing she was very much aware of.

clara came in the next day. she wore a button down top that fit her in all the right places. her cleavage on full display. she also wore one of those cute little mini skirts that basically had her ass on display. she walked in the library confidently. her little sex mafia book in hand. she immediately made eyes with billie. her iconic smile flashing to billie, and billie flashing it back. 

clara began to walk up to her desk. “hi billieee.” clara said, dragging the e out. “there’s my favorite girl.” billie said while closing her book. the words my favorite girl lighting clara’s face up. clara sat her previous book on the counter and began to walk back to the romance section. 

clara looked through the books until she found something that caught her eye. the description got straight to the point. explaining how sexual the book was. it was a book about a mafia boss and his wife. the book was extremely explicit. a smirk creeping across clara’s face.

clara walked over with the book in her hand. she rested her arms on billie’s desk, her boobs basically on full display for the older girl. sliding the book to her, she said, “hey billie can you tell me if this book is good or not?” clara asked.

billie nodded, taking the book from her. she looked at the cover and immediately knew what it was. her cheeks flushed red. 

“its uhm, its basically this book about some mafia boss and his wife who go on these mission. the plots pretty boring if you ask me. it’s mainly just lots and lots of sex. while reading it i tended to got distracted on whatever was actually going on because the sex was so much.” billie explained. an evil grin began to plaster across clara’s face. a face that billie had never seen on her before. 

“perfect.” is all she said. billie’s eyebrows furrowed. clara didn’t look like the type of person to be interested in a book like this. but billie pushed away her questions and scanned the book for her. “thank you.” clara said. a little seduction in her tone. it made billie shiver a little. 

clara went back to her door. she wasn’t actually interested in the book if she was being honest. this was all part of her plan. 

she waiting till it was late at night. she was in her skimpy victoria secret pajamas. the same pajamas that you could see her nipples through. it was currently 8:50. ten minutes before the library closed. she wanted to give billie one more visit. 

she began to walk back down to the library. her book in hand. she walked in and the room was completely empty. billie couldn’t even been seen in sight. a confused expression filled clara’s face. she began to look around the room. she got onto the fiction section when she saw billie. her back was facing clara’s. she was putting up some books. clara walked up behind her and tapped her shoulder. billie swung around. a terrified look on her face. billie immediately grabbed her chest.

“holy shit clara, shit, you scared me oh my god.” she said while trying to calm her down. all clara could do is smile at her. “i’m sorry.. i didn’t mean to startle you..” billie sighed. “its uhm, its fine. w-what are you doing here so late?” billie asked. 

clara took her book from behind her back. “my book… its too boring.” she explained. billie chuckled. “yeah i told you..” clara cut her off. “no. not boring like you said. it was too.. soft for me. too vanilla. could you help me find a more interesting one bils?” clara asked her. she made that same innocent look. only this time billie knew she was faking. billie was utterly confused as to what was going on but she decided to play along. “uh, sure i guess..” billie began to lead her back to the romance section again. 

as they went to the back they both started looking at books together. that’s when clara pulled out one. one she had already read, but billie didn’t have to know that. “can you tell me what this one is about?” clara asked. billie took the book from her hands. billie hadn’t read this one yet. 

she turned the book around and looked at the description. “uhh it says it’s about a teacher and student affair.” billie says. clara began to get closer to billie. “well isn’t that interesting?” clara’s said tilting her head. billie began to get hot. “uhm, yeah i guess so..” billie couldn’t hold eye contact. “doesn’t the thought of doing something with someone you shouldn’t be just turn you on? i mean come on, anyone would agree with that, right?” clara asked. lust filled her voice. the way she delivered that sentence gave billie goosebumps. clara began to get closer to billie. their chest touching. billie could feel clara’s hard nipples. billie gulped. 

clara chuckled. “bils you look hot.. you should take your jacket off. your face is getting red to..” clara said with a mocking tone. billie didn’t know what was happening at this point. her head was mush. she couldn’t think properly. “clara, stop.” billie demanded. clara looked at her confused. “stop what? am i not allowed to be concerned for you bils?” clara asked, this time running her fingers on billie’s arms. billie couldn’t take this anymore. 

billie took clara by the arms and pinned her against the book shelf. a little gasp escaping clara’s mouth. “what are you trying to get out of this, hm? prancing around here like a little slut.” billie spoke. her voice was rough. clara wasn’t expecting this whatsoever but she was complaining. billie began to rap her fingers around clara’s neck. “so tell me. what is it that you want?” this was a completely new tone for clara. if she thought she was hot before, this completely changed everything. 

“please, billie. i need you.” clara spoke out pathetically. thats all billie needed in order to flip clara over.

TAGLIST (dm,inbox,or comment to be added!) : @muchloveforhacker @chrissv4mp @mseilishmwah @chrissfawn @dev-sturns @kise-mo @devynscomet

[thestarrynightslover]

The Day You Finally Caught a Break

Pairing: Jay Halstead x Reader

Word count: 1,574

Warnings: FLUFF. Mentions of sex crimes and crimes involving special victims (all very slight).

Summary: After living in a boring routine, the detective (y/n) (y/l/n) catches a lucky break with her colleague Jay Halstead.

Disclaimer: I don’t own any of the One Chicago shows, or its characters, also not associated with it in any way or know anyone involved with it.

A/N: So, this is my first fic in a while and I am aware that it is very cheesy but I just felt like writing something cheesy. Anyways, I hope you like it!

(y/n) = (your name) (y/l/n) = (your last name) (y/n/n) = (your nickname)

| masterlist |

The day started just like any other would: waking up earlier than necessary, going for a run, doing some yoga, reading, and finally getting ready to go to work. Sure, to a lot of people that might have been a great morning, having all that time to do all that stuff… The only thing was: you’d been running on nothing beyond routine — one that had become quite boring, to be honest — for a couple of years now. Which made you that weird cop who actually enjoyed the worst cases just because it gave you some sort of purpose, some sort of change. Holding that thought, you were supposed to feel lucky once you and your team got deeper into your current case. But, even with the most boring of lives, a person — a decent human being — couldn’t feel lucky for even knowing something like that happens in the world, much less for having to know every sick and twisted detail of a case that involved sex trafficking, pregnant women, all sorts of assault and child abduction.

After it was “over”, around midnight, all of Intelligence seemed to silently agree on staying as long as necessary to finish their reports. Everybody thinking the same way: finishing this today, I can get outta here, get drunk, and put it in a box in the back of my head — where it’ll stay forever. As soon as someone would finish the paperwork, they’d grab their coat, mutter something resembling a goodbye, and rush out of there like the room was on fire. Molly’s wouldn’t be open anymore and none of you really wanted to spend time with each other to risk having to talk out what had happened. And then something strange happened.

Instead of just leaving like your partner Kim and his partner Kevin before her, Ruzek just stood at the door frame, waiting. For Upton. What? He kept looking at her desk so it was pretty obvious but the confirmation came when the detective got up saying: “Hey, Jay, I’mma get going now. You okay if we do our thing some other day?”

By the time Halstead looked up, she was almost reaching Adam which shocked the shit out of you but didn’t seem to faze him much, who only answered: “Yeah. Sure. Night, guys.” And then there were two—the only two Intelligence members who never exchanged more than a couple of polite measures.

Nevertheless, your gossip-starved soul got the best of you, who ended up blurting out a “They’re together?” to no one less than Jay Halstead. For a minute or so the other detective just looked around the room, as if expecting someone to jump out of nowhere and answer your question. But, after your eyes eventually met, he decided on answering.

“Eh… I don’t really know”, he started, while scratching the back of his neck, “I mean, it’s not like I’ve asked, you know?”

“Ah…” Was all you found to say after he stopped for a moment, but he continued.

“That’s just not really how it works between us. But the other day he did show up at her place late at night, which was suspicious. To say the least.” The words just flew right out of his mouth, surprising both of you, who started chuckling awkwardly at the recognition, “this is the first actual conversation we’ve had after all this time working together, isn’t it?”, he asked, ultimately.

“Yeah, I think it is,” you said, now full-on laughing. “God, I can’t believe that the first time I worked up the courage to actually talk to you was to ask for gossip!” You exclaimed, knowing that your cheeks were probably burning up with embarrassment.

“To be honest, I kinda needed to share that with someone. Especially after this moment here.” He confessed, making you laugh and forcing himself to laugh a bit more to try and hide the fact that he couldn’t stop staring at you. It just went wrong when his mouth betrayed him by saying: “You look so damn cute right now!”

"Well, it isn't every day that one finds out that the detective Jay Halstead is a gossip. Which makes me wonder who the cute one really is…"

"Oh, so that's where you're going with this?" He asked with his eyes twinkling. "Because I can prove just how not cute I am…"

"Oh?" You replied simply wondering what kind of proof he could provide against that.

"In fact, I have just the perfect idea, but, for that, you'd have to agree on going out with me first." Jay himself couldn't believe he finally managed to invite you out.

"Ooh, as in a d- date?" Who were you? Stuttering? C'mon!

"A date, yes." He answered, making you feel relieved and nervous again all at the same time.

"Yeah, I, uh, I wouldn't mind that at all. We can try and think of a date that works for both of us…" You suggested.

"Well, on Wednesday I'll be off, how about you?" Jay asked quickly.

"Oh no, that day I have somethings Platt wanted me to do. How about next Monday?"

"That's a no for me, 'cause I'm pulling doubles next week.*

"Damn…"

“Maybe this is a crazy idea but have you finished your report yet?” He asked quizzically.

“Uh, hitting the send button right now. Why?

“Then what if we do it now?”

“The date thingy?” You asked shyly, afraid that had been just a momentaneous thought that came out of his mouth too fast.

At that, he looked at you in awe, mesmerized by how adorable you were. “Yes. The date thingy.”

A million thoughts crossed your mind, including the one that that was a lifetime opportunity and that you should be better dressed, but figuring that saying something like that would only make you miss the opportunity, you settled for asking: “But where would we go? Like, it’s past 1 a.m., Jay, I don’t think there are a lot of places open…”

“Well, I might have a few ideas… Do you trust me?” He asked, holding his hand out to you, who grabbed it at the same time as you grabbed your jacket and purse with your other hand.

“Do you really need to ask that?"

And, like that, some time later you found yourself pulling up to the address Jay had texted you, which was in Canaryville, and it turned out to be an old movie theater that apparently was doing a week of classics with sessions at all times of the day. How Jay knew about that, though, was a mystery to you.

"Hey!" You heard him calling as he crossed the street. "You made a better time getting here than I did!"

"Yeah, well, my car might be faster than your old one," you replied, shrugging innocently.

"Haha, very funny," he deadpanned.

"Hey, this is a cool idea but how did you know it is happening?" You asked, genuinely curious. "I mean, you just don't seem a lot like a movie nerd to me."

"Well, there are still many things you don't know about me. But this one specifically is because I grew up around here and the owner is a friend of my family, so he always lets Will and I know about what's going on with the place."

"Hmmm, that explains it!" You exclaimed with a tad of satisfaction for not being too far off about him.

"But I do enjoy movies, okay?" You made a face of disbelief at him. To which he replied with: "It's true, alright? I'll admit that these days I haven't had much time for it but when I was growing up around here, this place was practically my second home!"

"Oh, so you've brought many others here, I'll assume!" You teased, suddenly feeling more comfortable and consequently more confident.

"Don't! Don't assume that! Growing up I wasn't very successful with the ladies and after that changed I haven't come here often…"

"Ooh, so that means that I'm your first?" You mocked, putting your hand to your heart, "Wow, I'm truly touched now!"

"Yeah, sure, have your fun with me all you want! All I really care about is the fact that I finally managed to get you to go out with me, so I can only hope you'll enjoy yourself." Him saying that, while gazing so intently at you, was making you weak on your knees and got you blushing a bit as well. So you tried to get the attention off you.

"Okay! Then let's pick a movie and watch it already, 'cause tomorrow's probably not gonna be any shorter."

A couple of hours later you and Jay were walking down the street towards a Waffle House while chatting and laughing about the movie like two best friends, which felt really nice but also made you a little confused about the being a date of that date the two of you were on. But, after you both had cleaned your plates at the diner, Jay came onto your bench to clean the corner of your mouth with a napkin, and next thing you knew, you were kissing very passionately in public like a couple of teens, forgetting about the rest of the world altogether, which made you realized, once more, how dull and colorless your life was previous to that moment so you held on to it and you held on to the man behind it.

[captain039]

Part 2 Stains of red

Astarion x omega!reader

Warnings: Vampire things, blood, light gore, witch things, fantasy things, swearing, age gap, heats, smut, shameless flirting, virgin reader, indulging in pleasure xD, pining, jealousy, possessiveness, angst, masturbation

Previous part <-

Astarion was there the next day some strange glint in his eyes as he sat boredly at your table.

“If you are bored, go elsewhere” you stated reading over a book and organising some herbs.

“The villagers are dull” he stated finger on his lips as he watched out the window.

“Did you hear someone died?” He asked and you froze looking to him.

“No, gods, another one? who was it? What happened?” You asked attention on him as he seemed unfazed. He smelt awfully fresh also, clean water and soap, a little too clean.

“Butchers boy, I don’t know his name” he shrugged and you frowned.

“He was here yesterday” you stated.

“Was that him?” He questioned still overly unfazed and you frowned at him, studying.

“Your witch powers won’t work ok me darling” he grinned standing up and peering at the book you were reading. He stood awfully close and you held your breath, glancing to the puncture scar on his neck. He always tried to cover them up with ruffles and high collars, for some strange reason your own teeth ached. You breathed out and stepped back, shaking your head.

“I’ll head to the village tonight, say my respects” you said brushing off the way your heart pounded.

“You will not” Astarion said too quickly and angrily eyes narrowing.

“It’s just the village I’ve been there plenty of times, it’s not like you’re my father!” You huffed at him hands of your hips.

“It’s the right thing to do” you added going to your room to pick an outfit. You heard Astarion growl and leave making you frown and watch his form disappear in the forest, why was he acting so strange?

Over the last few years members of the village have been found dead, brutally or strangely, the guardian of the dead did not share his input either on such things as he usually did.

Astarion had hung around like a fly, trying to concentrate with him around was hard. You hated how your body would go warm whenever he was near, or your mind would wonder to such dirty thoughts whenever he was close. You were thankful for magic, you blocked your thoughts from anyone and anything that wanted to peak inside, a safe in your mind where all your darkest secrets lied. You began to prepare dinner, the funeral would be tonight no doubt, you were also in need of supplies. Astarion was reading a book by your table, head resting on his hand which leant against the table, you wondered what he was thinking.

“After dinner I’m going to get ready, stay, leave or come with me I do not mind” you stated eating your stew. His face turned in a scowl and he snapped his book shut making you jump slightly b

“I’m hungry anyways” he grumbled and left making you huff at his behaviour.

You headed to the village after eating and getting ready. You headed to the funeral fire and saw the villagers already gathered around. You stayed back a bit listening to the speech the elder gave before the young man’s body was a lit with fire and sent to the gods. You said a small prayer wishing him safe passage to the after life. You headed back to the village, Gerrin was usually open till late anyway. You headed to his shop, ears sharp to the sounds around you. A little too sharp when you heard a moan. You froze and glanced to a dark alleyway, two people were there a woman pressed against the wall and a man against her. You flushed seeing his hand clearly down her skirt, her hips stuttering against his hand. Gods you didn’t mean to stare, but Ruby eyes looked your way with a blood stained mouth. You flushed and quickly darted down to Gerrins shop.

You panted as you slammed the door, leaning against it, unaware of Gerrins odd look.

“You alright?” He asked cocking his head.

“Huh?” You said dumbly cheeks a blaze. Gods why did you wish it was you against the wall. You shook your head furiously going around the shop and picking up what you needed.

“Ten gold” Gerrin said and you handed him ten gold coins and thanked him quietly.

“Goodnight” you nodded your head before leaving in a rush. You glanced down that same street, sighing in relief when you didn’t see them there. You rushed back to your cabin and closed the door a little harshly before sighing. You rested your basket on the table and groaned as you flopped into bed. Between your thighs was hot and slightly wet making you flush and bite the inside of your cheek. You stood, closed your windows and locked them, blew out the candles and stripped before lying on your bed and getting under the covers. You clenched the sheets mind replaying the scene you saw only putting yourself there. Your hand trailed down your stomach and to your cunt, you bit the inside of your cheek as you imagined Astarions slender fingers sliding through your folds, whispering about how wet you were for him. Your back arched slightly as you slowly began to finger your self hearing Astarions voice echo in your mind.

‘Such a pretty thing’ he’d whisper in your ear, gently kissing down your neck. You added a second and sighed continuing the scene.

‘I wouldn’t want to hurt you sweetheart, relax for me’ you whined softly pressing your thumb to your clit and slowly rubbing.

‘You can do it’ his voice whispers in your mind.

“Come for me’ it added as you quickened your pace and felt your stomach coil and release. You moaned quietly and panted as you felt yourself orgasm fingers still slowly moving before you pulled them out. You were in a slight bliss before reality came back, your cheeks on fire again as you stood and grabbed your gown on shaky legs. You washed your hands and sat at the table suddenly guilty about what you had done. Unaware of who lied in the forest.

Next part ->

[indierpgnewsletter]

Should the GM make things interesting?

Obviously, yes. But also, no.

Words are great, stay with me.

I was reading an Alexandrian article that was about the – often debated – idea that when players come up with a good plan and the dice roll in their favour, their plan should just work. While a GM might be tempted to force some hitch, some curveball, some twist – some interesting-ness, the Alexandrian (and lots of other people) suggest that you should resist that urge and just let things be simple.

The sense that “something interesting should happen here” is understandable because it’s so often the role that the GM is playing. It comes from stories we know and other games we’ve played, right? There’s no good heist movie where the plan just works out. And probably your favourite gaming session was one where there were outrageous twists and unforeseen consequences. This particularly applies to trad and storygames – cultures that want sessions to feel like a particular kind of narrative or a particular medium, usually a movie or TV show.

Now the Alexandrian has a very trad focus. In the games being discussed, players normally spend a lot of time planning – discussions, debates, dice rolls around investigation and convincing NPCs. Now anyone who has invested all this time will find it pretty fun if their plan goes well. So I agree with the Alexandrian, if the dice fall favourably (rare!), a hitch-less session is great and will be enjoyed by all. And if everyone is already having fun, why would you feel the need to do something more?

If you think that it’s only interesting when sessions have twists and turns, then play something like Blades in the Dark where the idea is that you plan less and fail more. It’s probably a better fit for you because it’s design is in line with how you want to play.

Okay, but what happens when you’re playing Blades in the Dark and the players are just rolling 6s? In a lot of Forged in the Dark games, there’s been a trend towards designing some kind of currency that the GM can spend to introduce twists that is aimed squarely at this problem. I am not a fan of that stuff for two reasons. First, because mostly they’re giving people permission to do things that they already do. Nothing can stop me when I think of something cool to say, nothing! Or to put it more seriously, there’s a reason Apocalypse World says you make GM moves when players look to you. Or when there’s a golden opportunity. Second, even though these games are it’s-only-interesting-when-things-go-wrong games, even though there is minimal planning investment, it is still perfectly fine for a session to have only expected and obvious things happen.

Why? Because the players’ actions are interesting enough. Or at least, they should be.

Games like Blades in the Dark are more or less defined to facilitate players taking only interesting actions. They’re designed around players coming up with outrageous ideas and having the tools to actualize them. Not always succeeding… but at least crashing and burning in an entertaining way.

I think it’s important to think of these games as ones where players are supposed to be able to entertain themselves.

But, you ask, what if the players’ plans aren’t interesting? Well, I say, interesting to whom? If the players’ actions aren’t interesting even to them i.e. they are bored by their own choices, then that’s a real problem. When I find myself in that situation, it either means I’m having an off-day or I’m playing the wrong game with the wrong group. Not a big deal – I’ve been there before, I know what to do (see last week’s post). But it’s not something that can be fixed by a GM. If their actions aren’t interesting to you but are interesting to them, that’s a complicated situation too. But it has nothing to do with games.

So, yes. Should the GM make things interesting? Obviously, yes. But also, sometimes, no.

(This was first published in the Indie RPG Newsletter.)

[steddieas-shegoes]

Read Vampire Eddie first!

Dustin shows up first.

They didn’t call him yet, he just seemed to have a fucking sixth sense or something.

Steve had fallen asleep in Eddie’s lap after crying it out, as anyone would do when their sort of friend/sort of enemy comes back from the dead (kind of) unexpectedly.

But he was woken up by a yell that either belonged to a young girl or Dustin Henderson.

“Steve! You better explain what the hell is going on!”

Steve’s eyes blinked up at where Dustin was standing in front of them with his hands on his hips. If it were any other time or day, Steve would probably be proud of him for it.

“Did you have to wake him up? He only just got to sleep.”

Steve sighed before he answered Dustin’s question.

“It was really late and you didn’t answer the radio. We were gonna call when we got up.”

“This isn’t wait to call news, Steve! This is show up at my door news. This is take an ad out in the paper news.”

“Dustin, you’re being dramatic.”

Dustin just stared at him for a moment before throwing his hands up.

“You’re. Sitting. In. Eddie’s. Lap. Steve, you realize he’s been dead for a month! A month!”

“I haven’t been dead for all of it! Only like, three or four days of it!” Eddie looked away. “Or at least that’s how my math is working. But I failed math a few times.”

Dustin was staring between Eddie and Steve.

“What do you mean?”

Steve was still trying to wake himself up. He apparently hadn’t been out for long, but it felt like he was pretty deep into sleep.

He suddenly felt Eddie’s fingers running through his hair.

“‘S not helping.”

“Go back to sleep, sweetheart. I’ll talk to him.”

Steve let his eyes close, but he still listened to them for a few minutes.

“And why the hell did you come to Steve? You barely know him! You could’ve come to me.”

“Dude, I didn’t pick this. I just appeared here.”

“What do you mean?”

Steve couldn’t see, but Dustin seemed to be calming down from the shock now, focusing on his natural curiosity.

“I just. Thought about being here I guess. Maybe I was delirious or bored. I was definitely lonely. It’s hard wandering that place for so long by yourself, man.”

“Yeah, I don’t know how Will did it.”

“I don’t know either. I’m not even completely human anymore and I was ready to give up.”

Steve was drifting, catching only a few words here and there.

“….explain….Steve….him sweetheart?”

“Just….and….I know….love….”

— — — — — — — — —

Steve woke up in his bed again.

The sun was shining much too brightly for it to be early in the morning, but he couldn’t think of the last time he actually managed to sleep more than a few hours.

He looked over to the bundled up mound under his comforter and everything from the night before came flooding back.

He heard a snore from the floor to his left and leaned over to see Dustin curled up with a blanket and pillow.

Steve has two guest rooms, one of which is frequently used by the kids when they stay over after movie nights. Why wasn’t he in those?

“He didn’t wanna leave either of us.”

Steve jumped at the sound of Eddie’s voice.

It wasn’t loud, in fact, it was barely above a whisper. But he’d assumed Eddie was asleep.

“Woke up a few minutes before you. Dustin snores so loud.”

Steve snorted and then lifted the comforter so he could look at Eddie, who was cuddling with one of Steve’s pillows.

Oh, that was cute

“Okay, I have to tell you something. I should’ve told you before.”

“What is it?”

“I can…kind of…read your mind?”

Oh no.

Oh no.

“Yeah. Sorry. I’m not trying to. You’re the first person I’ve been around so I figured it was just a new thing I could do, but I can’t read Dustin’s mind and we tried a bunch of things. I’m trying to block it out, but it’s hard when it’s just us.”

Eddie looked…was that shame?

Steve couldn’t let him feel ashamed for this. It was not only out of his control, but also a super shitty thing to have to deal with. Listening to Steve’s thoughts? Steve didn’t even like doing that.

“Hey. Be nice.”

“I’m not being mean to you!”

“Not to me! To you!”

Steve couldn’t help the confused look on his face.

Then he realized that if Eddie could read his mind, he could hear when he put himself down.

“You do that often?”

“What?”

“Treat yourself this badly?”

“Well…”

“Steve.” Eddie placed a hand on his cheek, rubbing his thumb back and forth along his cheekbone. “You know how amazing you are, don’t you?”

Steve shook his head.

What else could he do? He couldn’t lie. Eddie would know.

Eddie’s other hand was settled on Steve’s hip, squeezing his fingers just enough to ground Steve.

“Well, since I’m being honest this morning, let me hit you with another truth. This one’s been hanging around for years, and got much worse when you decided to make it worse in the Upside Down.” Eddie took a breath before continuing. “I’ve had a crush on you since your sophomore year. It’s so stupid, right? You were everything I was against. I actively fought with Tommy frequently and you just watched. But I’d always watch you when he was finally done and you’d just be watching me with this look. I don’t even know what it was, maybe I was reading too much into it because you were so god damn cute, I dunno. I’m rambling. Jesus Christ, I’m shutting up now.”

Eddie started to pull away, but Steve wasn’t gonna allow that. Not after that confession.

Not after he’d spent the last month mourning a lot of would’ve, could’ve, should’ve moments.

Steve pulled himself closer to Eddie, hands curling up against his chest, telling himself not to panic when he didn’t feel a heartbeat. He’s alive.

“I didn’t know then. I didn’t know why I looked at you like that. I didn’t know I could feel the way I did about girls and about you. I didn’t have anyone to explain it to me.” Steve’s breath stuttered as he looked up at Eddie, who was watching him with wide eyes. “But I know what it was now. You were pretty god damn cute, too.”

Eddie’s hand found its way back to Steve’s cheek. Steve leaned into it, letting his mind run through thoughts he remembers having about Eddie through high school, the Upside Down, and after.

“You really thought that? You’re not making this all up?”

“I wouldn’t make it up, Eds. You don’t have to believe me, but I want you to know that you’re amazing, too.”

“You two are disgusting.”

Steve and Eddie both jumped at Dustin’s voice, but smiled at each other before Eddie pushed the comforter off of their heads.

Dustin was sitting up on the floor, sleepy eyes still managing to glare at them in bed.

“Sorry, bud. Forgot you were there.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Dustin yawned. “I’m gonna go let everyone know that Eddie’s back and wants their blood.”

“Hey! I do not! I just want some blood, not their blood.”

“It’ll be fun to make them think so, though.”

“Dude, the way to break this news to them is not gonna be making them think Eddie’s Dracula.”

Eddie snorted at Steve’s words and Dustin shook his head.

“There is no other way to break the news. You two get whatever this is out of your system by dinner time. Everyone’s gonna want to see you.”

When Dustin had this particular tone, they knew they had to listen. Which was kind of annoying because they’re the adults, but whatever.

Steve was kind of just glad that Dustin was showing some emotions besides anger and sadness again.

“Fine. Don’t come back before 7. If you do, I’m not sorry for what you walk in on.”

Steve felt himself blush as Eddie spoke.

“Gross! Can you at least pretend I’m not leaving you two to have sex? Jesus.”

“Nobody said anything about sex. You’re such a teenage boy, Dustin.”

Steve giggled as he rested his head against Eddie’s chest.

Dustin didn’t add anything else to the conversation, probably sensing that Eddie was going to say more embarrassing things the more he argued.

“Seriously. 7:00. Be dressed and at least mildly presentable,” he said as he left the room.

Steve felt Eddie relax and wrap his arms around him, resting his fingers along his spine and tapping a melody. He did that a lot against his own leg or tables, Steve had noticed before everything happened. It seemed like a nervous habit, but he shouldn’t be nervous now. They’d done the hard part already; Admitted feelings and faced the possibility of rejection.

“Hey. What’s wrong?”

Steve didn’t want to look up at his face yet. Not if he was changing his mind.

“I’m. Well, I do need some blood.” He started to pull his arms away from Steve, like he was actually going to leave this very warm and cozy bed. “I can be back quick. I mean, animal blood seems to work pretty well so.”

Steve looked at him.

Really looked at him.

He shouldn’t do this.

He really shouldn’t do this.

“I mean I have plenty of blood. Like, if you didn’t wanna go out.”

Eddie stared at him, possibly not even comprehending what he was subtly (not really) offering.

“Uh.”

Steve tried not to feel too proud about rendering Eddie nearly silent, but considering how much Eddie always spoke, he counted it as a win.

“I mean, you don’t need much right? It’s like donating blood. People do it all the time.”

“Steve. I can’t. I can’t drink your blood.”

“Why not?”

“Because I’m not sure I’ll stop.”

Something about that made butterflies appear in his stomach, which is probably not the right reaction to someone saying they could drain your entire body of its blood. Steve was learning a lot about himself today.

“You’ll stop.”

“I’ve never had a human’s blood before, sweetheart. I don’t know if I could stop even if I wanted to.”

“You’ll stop.”

Eddie shook his head.

“I can’t take that risk with you. Not unless I know I could stop.”

“How else will you know if you don’t try?”

“I don’t know, but I can’t use you as a test subject. Especially not while we’re alone. Someone should be around in case I can’t stop.”

“We’ll call Robin then.”

Steve started to sit up so he could use the phone by his bed to call her when he felt Eddie’s hands on his shoulders.

“Steve. I don’t know if it’s a good idea. The few times I’ve drank from an animal that was still alive, they were like, hypnotized? I don’t want you to get like that. You wouldn’t have any control.”

Steve’s reaction was probably not what either of them expected, and it definitely wasn’t normal.

He whimpered. Like he was already being drained of blood.

And he was, kind of. It was all going to his dick.

Eddie looked like he might actually eat Steve. Steve was gonna be okay with that, actually.

“Steve. I have to go. I don’t think I have enough control.”

“Please.”

Steve sounded desperate, which was what he was. He’d be embarrassed about it if he could think about anything other than having Eddie’s mouth on his neck, teeth in his skin.

Steve was crawling into Eddie’s lap, wrapping his legs around his waist and arms around his neck, pulling him as close as he could.

If Eddie had any type of super strength, he wasn’t using it to push him away.

Steve counted that as another win.

“I can hear what you’re thinking. This isn’t fair to you. I have every advantage.”

“I want you to.”

“What if I can’t stop?”

His voice was quiet and Steve paused for a moment to gently cup his cheeks in his hands.

“I know you can. You’ve had every opportunity to hurt me, Eds. You could’ve hurt Dustin. You could have run from here by now and gone to anyone’s house and hurt them. But you haven’t. And you won’t hurt me. You’ll stop when you’ve had enough.”

“I don’t know that I could ever have enough of you.”

If Steve wasn’t fully on board with this before, that would have sold him on it for sure.

This may be a risk, but it was a risk Steve would rather die than not take.

“I trust you, Eds.”

He felt more than saw Eddie give in.

Steve rested his forehead against Eddie’s and closed his eyes.

He took a shaky breath, suddenly nervous that he’d made a fool of himself. He pushed the nerves down, though, knowing Eddie would leave if he thought Steve was having doubts.

“I want you to take what you need from me. Please.”

Part 3

TAG LIST: @bisexualdisastersworld

[charmingpplincardigans]

How’s everyone doing? I’ll go first, I’m bad!

I have been ~*~struggling~*~ since mid-September and in the last two weeks it has just gotten unbearable. I feel like I’m drowning all the time. I’m having trouble keeping up with and reaching out to people I want to talk to. And that’s like, on top of always having been bad at getting back to people. *stares forlornly at the ask Chaz sent me like, literally two years ago that I think about daily but just. haven’t. RESPONDED TO.*

Things are just. Closing in on all sides unfortunately. I’ve been sick several times. I bounced this month’s rent check. A thing I had NEVER DONE BEFORE IN MY LIFE before this last move. My job is literally never going to pay me what I’m worth. Or anyone what they’re worth, frankly. I broke down in front of my boss the other day and just sobbed for an hour because after I pay my bills every paycheck I have just enough left over to buy groceries for two weeks, if I’m careful, and little else. Which means I’m putting stuff like gas on credit cards, which isn’t helping the debt that makes me feel like drowning in the first place.  I’ve been at this job SEVENTEEN YEARS. A steady, corporate job. And I’ve never once in my entire time there made an actual cost of living raise!! The cost of living just keeps raising without me! (And also everyone else, I know!)

I’m super overdue on getting people the art they commissioned from me, but my brain just hasn’t been in a good enough place to create much of anything, and I keep thinking I have to get this done and then thinking they deserve better than this, around and around on a loop ad finitum. And there are a couple of other things going on personally that just fucking blow that I don’t know how to fix and I’m just gonna choke on it.

I haven’t done any fandom stuff since NYCC. I haven’t written on my WIP. I haven’t read fic. I don’t check in on the madness happening on twitter. I’ve barely popped my head into my favorite pirate group chat over the last five months or so. I miss doing all of that so much and my stupid brain is so broken that even when I try I can’t enjoy it.

Shit. I’m having a hard time getting work work done. I just sit down at my desk every day, answer emails, and then spend five or so hours frozen with anxiety because there’s too much to do and doing nothing is only making it worse every day.

I need to be back in therapy ASAP, but unfortunately you can’t eat therapy so I can’t pay for it!!

And I feel guilty saying any of this to almost everyone I would usually talk to. (Congrats and condolences to the rest of you!) Because they’re having a harder time than me. Or because they’d just want to give me a bit of money about it, which would fuck me up even more. Or because it’s just tedious and boring and no one wants to listen to me talk about this over and over again, even though it’s all my brain does every hour of every day. It’s a wonder I’m ever able to talk about anything else.

My boss is pretty great, in spite of it all. She’s constantly supportive (to the extent she can be), and she just. She tells me all the time how creative and wonderful and smart and cool to know I am. And every time I just like, tear up, because none of it feels true. But I also tear up when my friends and my partner say those things too. Because to me, a full grown adult without a savings or a 401K or the ability to like, go get drinks just because I want to, I feel like a complete and utter failure.  So like. Whatever I guess!!

I need to find a new job that pays me way more. Then I can get a therapist to fix my brain and save money to pay down my debts and have money to have fun with my friends and not feel like a constant financial burden on everyone. Then I can have the brain power back to maybe work on my fic or complete that art or like, I don’t know, talk to the people who actively want to talk to me. You wouldn't think that part would be so hard, but it really, really is.

I’m working on it. I’ll keep working on it. I have LinkedIn open right now. I’m gonna fucking sob through it, but that doesn’t mean none of it will get done.

In the meantime, if anyone knows of a good way to make a quick $30 grand, I’m all ears.

[natureboy96]

My journey through the Court of Thorns and Roses series

It’s been roughly a month since I started reading the ACOTAR series, and let me tell you, it’s been one mad ride. I’ve had a lot of thoughts on the books, and I needed to put them down somewhere to hopefully stop them from rattling around in my brain for much longer (success tbd). While I am writing this more for myself than anyone else, I wondered if anyone else went through a similar journey that I have, and perhaps help understand why people view the series as they do. I’ll be going book by book to break things down.

(Also might be worth mentioning that I am a gay man in my thirties, which definitely impacted how I read certain parts of the books..)

ACOTAR

Having come into the series with absolutely no hints as to what it was about (besides the back blurb), I actually found this first book… kinda boring? I was surprised, I suppose, to see it was a Beauty and the Beast retelling, but that actually made me look forward more to where things actually deviated from the script (I texted my sister it was around chapter 30 that I felt things really getting interesting).

That’s not to say I didn’t enjoy parts of it - the more intimate moments between Tamlin and Feyre were what I liked most, like them dancing together after he played, or him appreciating that painting that made him not feel alone, moments like those. A bit stilted writing, perhaps, but fine.

When we went Under the Mountain, though, that’s when my interest picked up. I felt the fear that Tamlin and Feyre felt, knowing one wrong move could be their last. I felt terribly icky at the things Feyre was manipulated to do; maybe I can see how people might think her dancing black out drunk in a napkin could be a sexy fantasy, but it definitely didn’t do it for me, nor the bone twisting. The trials themselves felt… underwhelming (the worm was some exciting action that our Feyre’s skills to use at least, but the second one was kinda meh), but I was interested in seeing a story where the main character actually experiences some lasting impact of trauma, something I feel a lot of books gloss over. Seeing what Feyre and Tamlin were willing to sacrifice for each other also helped solidify their relationship for me. I went into the second book excited to see how it was handled, and to see what kind of character Rhysand proved to be, after his UtM admissions and actions…

ACOMAF

I was into this text a lot quicker than the previous one, no doubt because of what I mentioned about seeing actual consequences for trauma. I didn’t expect to see so much of Tamlin’s trauma as I did, but I appreciated seeing even a high lord couldn’t walk away from something like what happened without damage. I definitely felt the tragedy of what happened to their relationship, seeing how trauma warped and changed the way they were to the point where they no longer fit, and I was glad Feyre was able to leave.

That brings us to what I thought was the best point, seeing Feyre get the space and patience and support she needed to heal, from Rhysand and the rest of the Inner Court. Like the first book, some parts felt a bit stilted to me, but seeing her gain back her confidence and work through the pain Amarantha had dealt was with satisfying. Having her find a group she came to care for and a place she felt safe was wonderful.

I couldn’t say I saw the end twists coming, and I was definitely shocked to see Tamlin siding with an evil king who wanted to bring back slavery; after what I knew of him in the first book, it felt to me like there had to be more going on, and I immediately started the next book after finishing this one in 3 days.

I was also quite interested in Elain and Nesta’s changes too, I hadn’t expected them to be big characters after the first book, but it makes sense to tie them together - and give some fun stuff to work with in the next book.

ACOWAR

Unlike the last book, I finished this one in two days :p

I enjoy a lot of politics and intrigue in my books, so I enjoyed hearing about a lot of the planning that went into preparing for the upcoming war. I enjoyed hearing Feyre’s thoughts and plans for the Spring Court, and I was glad Lucien was able to escape with her - I haven’t mentioned him much but I have enjoyed his character quite a bit. I loved getting to meet with the other high lords and see the Dawn Court, though I found it odd how easily everyone seemed to lose their temper at what was supposed to be a diplomatic meeting. I read Tamlin’s words as being sheer bitterness, but I was glad to hear he hadn’t betrayed everyone blindly and had a plan.

The end of the book was a bit of a shock twist page after page, and I couldn’t put it down. Dads coming out of nowhere with an army only to die a few pages later? Monsters joining the fight only to get murked? Elain pulling an Arya Stark stabbing on the big baddie? The only surprise I had been expecting was Akeem’s transformation; I felt the biblical angel clues were strong enough to expect an angel of death when she changed.

I didn’t like the fakeout Rhysand death. It felt like it was tacked on for a bit more milked drama, only to be undone moments later. What I did love was how the end of the story gave Tamlin the chance to save both Feyre and Rhysand, despite everything that they had done to each other. I had hoped it was the chance for them to start healing that rift, not expecting them to be friends or in love again, but respectful at least..

Also some questionable choices for sexy scenes, but again, I kinda didn’t read too much into em, not my thing.

ACOFAS

This is where something changed with my thoughts on the text. I thought it was a nice “Christmas” story, and I enjoyed seeing where and how people were preparing for it with each other. I felt for Nesta, and as hard as it was to see where she was I didn’t feel she was ready for healing from her trauma yet, and was interested to see where it went. Wasn’t as big a fan of people talking down to Lucien, but that wasn’t the real issue I had here…

Rhysand’s visits to Tamlin may have been brief, but they struck a really unpleasant note in an otherwise nice little story. I had come to see Rhysand as a good person over the books, over what he had said and did. I couldn’t like that up, though, with the way he treated Tamlin in this book. I didn’t expect them to be friends, or even like each other, but I couldn’t understand how Rhysand could be so cruel to a person who had saved not only his life (even though I could have easily seen him not doing so), but Feyre’s, Elaine’s and Azriel’s lives too, and in doing so played a crucial part in saving the whole world. How could someone see this person who is clearly broken and so alone, and beat him down further? And then to come back and see what state he was in, and essentially suicide bait him while making him a steak? It was such a harsh and cruel thing to do that it took me right out of the text, and I took some time with that thought in my head.

AFTER READING

I had been planning to jump into Silver Flames right away, but the sour taste of how Tamlin was treated in the last book was really bothering me, and I needed to share my thoughts with someone. None of my friends had read the books, so I turned online to see what people thought, and… I have to admit, I was shocked at the level of sheer vitriol directed in Tamlin’s direction. If this was after the second book, I could see some of it, but undoubtedly most people who were sharing their dislike of his character had read all the books, even past what I read. It didn’t make sense to me, that someone we knew was a kind and good person in the first book, who was warped by trauma and bitterness in the second but helped save our main characters in the third, only to be kicked while he was down, was so incredibly hated? The more I read, the more confused and honestly frustrated I started feeling. It was as if there was nothing good in his character, who quite objectively did quite a few good things!

Until I had read ACOFAS, I had taken everything as it had been delivered to me, through Feyre’s thoughts and words. Hell, I was so into it after the second book I went and bought the coloring pages and some very expensive pens! After, though, I began rereading parts of the texts in a more critical lens, trying to somehow connect the cruelty I’d read and felt with people’s words online, with what I thought was the point of the text, of healing through trauma, and how I has liked the various characters.

It was around then that I found I wasn’t the only one who had similar thoughts and feelings towards Tamlin’s character and how he was treated in the narrative, and the fandom. I noticed some things I had missed before, where Feyre’s perspective of Tamlin had shifted to make his character from the first book worse in the second and third. Not even inconsistencies in terms of character traits changing, but points where events in the first book were quite blatantly retconned in a different view entirely, and then for people to ignore the former for the latter because it made Tamlin worse. The more that I started looking, the more issues I started picking up, issues of characters being held to different standards by both the character in text, and the people reading them.

Now, a month out from reading the books, I think it’s become very clear that the author intended for people to strongly dislike Tamlin’s character, and for a lot of people, the author’s intention is enough to accept that view. When it comes to writing, though, an author’s intention ends with the words they put down, adding clarifying statements afterwards can help show their intention, but the intent is the same. Readers, then, are free to interpret a text how they will; not everyone is going to get the same experience from a story as everyone else, because people are individuals with their own outlooks on the world they bring to a text. Just because one agrees with the author’s intention with a text doesn’t make other’s differing interpretations less valid. People don’t have to like Tamlin’s character for all the reasons the author tells you, but that doesn’t make criticism of the view wrong, or bad. People who criticize the author’s choices and the actions of characters in a text are as valid as the author’s choice to write them in the first place. I’ve come away from this feeling Tamlin’s character has been “done dirty”, whether the author intended for me to have that opinion (she clearly didn’t). That doesn’t make my viewpoint less valid, just different, and based in the same text other interpretations come from.

In the end, I’ve come down from the obsessed high I had with the series, and I’ve settled on having very mixed feelings overall. Once my interpretation of the earlier texts had changed, it kinda rusted some of the luster the books had had in my mind and added a more critical, negative undercurrent to things I had seen as entirely good before. For me, that actually makes them more interesting, and I like the idea of talking about and debating points of a text and how they can be interpreted. I don’t know if I could recommend the series to other people, though, what with the feelings I’ve had towards the actual texts and the fandom around them. I will probably be invested still for a time longer, though - whether I read Silver Flames (the takes I’ve seen online are veeery mixed, but perhaps my take would be different than what I’ve seen) or the next book afterwards, it’s been a real and novel experience diving headfirst into it all.

[houseofbrat]

Seeing as he’s benefitted so much from this flexible working opportunity, is he going to come out and champion this for the general public? Acknowledging his privilege would go a long way here I think. People can’t help what they’re born into but they can do a lot with the platform they’re given.

I wonder if he will do that as well. As it seems another PR fiasco waiting to happen. The Queen was dying of cancer but had all her children working full time.

Whenever articles like this come out I am reminded of what Wills was like when he actually had to work and had weeks off at a time to the dismay of his colleagues.

‘He’s hardly ever on shift. He was very enthusiastic to begin with but it tailed off. It’s supposed to be four on, four off but with the Duke it’s more off than on. He had at least four weeks off over Christmas, which has to be staffed the same as normal weeks. It’s fine that he gets a bit of special treatment but it’s beginning to really annoy some people. The rumour is that he’s just a bit bored of it.’ ”

And then the royal household shot back at claims we was lazy by saying he needed mandatory rest days for his job resulting in the Civil Aviation Authority having to shoot back and saying “When they are having rest days their time is their own, and they can do what they want, including carrying out royal duties.”

I can’t imagine this level of unprofessionalism.

The whole thing I’ve felt about this is what a stark contrast it is to the plebs they rule over - from preventative chemo when we have people waiting months on the NHS (from personal experience experience - I had a scam last year to see if I have a form of gynaecological cancer. I was told the scan was clear. Last month I was told that the scan was actually inconclusive and needs redoing as they couldn’t see the part the needed to but no one told me until nearly a year later) to partners who get punished for taking time off work to care for a loved one.

I understand that they are rich and powerful enough to do what they want. But it’s rather galling to see such a stark contrast between ruler and subject.

He really does seem like he’s not interested in the whole thing doesn’t he?

He's only interested in the income and power that comes with it, he'll never give it up he's spent his whole adult life trying to do as little as possible. The moment he got access to the Prince of Wales duchy $ he was no longer beholden to his father and can now redefine expectations. The bar has been set pretty low and he has the British Tabloid Media propping him up and running PR for him, there's also evidence that they spend a fair chunk of cash employing bots online propping them up and attacking anyone who says anything negative. Between the BTM and the royal sychophants he's been getting away with it and will continue to. Countdown 3,2,1 to one of those sycophants leaving me a comment .....

I think he should have to follow around people who have to keep working while also caregiving for sick or elderly family members while also juggling raising kids and keeping up on other obligations. I’m sure he would be shocked — most of us can’t step back to the extent he gets to do so. As the future king, he should understand the lives of the majority of the people. Read the room.

Considering their work is mostly just turning up and being “seen”. How exactly is work from home gonna help anyone?

He’s going to do some twitch streaming.

I just learned that 600 organizations sponsored by QE2 have not yet been taken over.  Some are very important but there are no signs of any restructuring, selection and elimination plans.  People criticize W for this instead of C because W is the one who shows no interest in continuing to show up and sponsor organizations.  William currently only works as Chairman, managing the principality and two projects Earthshot and Housing for the Homeless.  W does not take over King Charles' projects like he is PoW, so King is basically overloaded and cannot take over anymore. 

If he wants to work without being seen, then the real question is what type of "behind the scenes work" is he actually doing? Because every time he talks about a topic in public, he only seems to speak popular talking points that even someone without knowledge can say. He doesn't speak like someone who really knows the topic of discussion in depth.

That's why Earthshot being a "passion project" is laughable. His speeches are so shallow. It's the same with Kate and Early Years and those lame five questions that took some ten years to come up with. Everything they say is like a total no-brainer. So, what work are they really doing behind the scenes?

I think people whose spouses have cancer should be able to take health leave and its v sad for people who live in a country where they can't. But I would give him a lot more grace if he and Kate weren't famously Duchess Dolittle and Workshy William. This has been a habit for years. Its not like Anne got sick and disappeared from public life

Yep. He has been on Easter holiday since March 23 to April 17. Plus, January entirely off. It doesn't look good.

My friend has breast cancer (we’re in the UK). She’s having chemo and is the same age as Kate. She has to have fairy major surgery after the chemo and has had to go back to work because she has to save her sick leave for the recovery from the operation. This is during chemotherapy. This country is completely broken and lacks compassion for everyone (like most of the Western World) but then expects an exception to be made for the royal family who are loaded and don’t even use the NHS and have an enormous amount of monetary resources.

I have huge compassion for Kate. I think she’s been incredible over a long period of time in a job I would absolutely loathe personally (whether people say she wanted the gig or not) - but I don’t think William has had her back very much recently from what I can see objectively, particularly over the recent PR debacle. And, being honest, I wonder why that is. I think we’re fed total BS by the press over who these people really are.

I don’t think you can be raised like William or Harry and have any kind of perspective. It’s just logical that you can’t. They had a terrible childhood to be honest. And there are people who hold responsibility for that.

But yes, absolutely, if Kate wants him there, he should be allowed to support his family, no questions asked. I just wonder if she really does?

Can someone who knows actually share what his duties are and how he can work while not being seen?

Can someone who knows actually share what his duties are and how he can work while not being seen?

He looks at the country with somber frowns on his face and in return the country looks back at him with approving nods. That is what we call a symbiotic relationship.

How quickly William forgets the way he and Kate were ripped apart prior to the great Sussex Split.  He can do what he wants, but this is inevitably not going to go well and he is definitely no longer a young and handsome sympathetic figure.

Yeah that one reporter said it perfectly when they were speculating about why Will didn’t go to that funeral that William feels he can do what he likes because the press let’s him get away with everything.

"Working from home"? How stupid do they think people are? waits to see the defense(s) royalists come up with

Is she sicker than anticipated? Because Charles seems to have actual cancer versus "cancer was present" and "preventative chemo," and he is "working" more than William.

Also, don't forget that Camilla has also been out and about and "working," during his treatments.

Something is weird.

The press’s analysis of him is willfully ignorant as usual. It used to be the kids, now it’s Kate’s diagnosis. Will is telling us his approach to royal “work” is not and will not be the same as the King or Queen Elizabeth. This is his plan for the monarchy.

They've been doing it since he left Eaton. It's one invented excuse after another. Anything to excuse his refusal to do any royal "work" so they don't have to criticize him, and he can keep his "Golden Boy" image.

let him enjoy a normal college experience!

he's only in his 20s! He's got time!

He's an ambulance pilot, let him have fun with that for a bit!

He's not the heir! He's only the son of the heir!

he just got married!

He's only in his 30s! He's got time!

he has babies at home!

he has small children at home!

he's not the King, his father is!

His wife has cancer!

What's next?

Will is telling us his approach to royal “work” is not and will not be the same as the King or Queen Elizabeth.

Mmhmm well the press and royalists' response to Will telling them he' would rather be a lazy, hands off King is for him to reconsider his entitlement and privilege - reality check for this 40 something year old Prince

Bingo. Start as you mean to go on...which means doing nothing and collecting taxpayer money while you do it.

William’s work ethic is going to be a catalyst to reform the UK government :/ EII had to be seen to be believed - William believes in not being seen? The republicans will gain momentum with a King who does nothing.

To repeat what I said a month or so ago when they claimed William was focused on “his work, not social media:” what work?

[lumiidragon]

So I’ve been on a bit of a break which is why I’ve been pretty MIA, so sorry about that!  but I finally got to watch Season 7 of TNR and I can finally put my own review on it~! Please note that this contains spoilers, so if you haven’t seen it yet, stop reading here!

So I’ll start with my season issues before its good points. First off, the dragon secret is out to ICARUS and it was...incredibly lack luster. We had a 1 month time jump and the big reveal of dragons was rather...anti-climatic. I was really expecting a bit more from that, but oh well. Also, in the first episode, we get to finally see nadders, but they’re all hyper aggressive and it’s the only way we get to see them. They don’t show up again. Sad on that one. Next, of course is Thunder’s “alpha”-type thing he did to stop the nadders. I REALLY hope it was just a dominance stance as in “I’m tough and I’m being loud, so back off” and not “Thunder’s becoming the new alpha like Toothless” or else he is going to lose serious character points from me. It’d make literally no sense, especially since he nor his family are obviously alpha’s of all dragons and an alpha status isn’t some unlockable ability, it’s earned.

So the next thing and probably my biggest issue with this (especially those of you who know me will know I was going to have issues with this) BUT THEY KILLED THE FUCKING DEATHGRIPPERS. YES. THEY. KILLED. THEM. The deathgrippers are the ONLY dragons that got this treatment and that is actual bullshit. Oh, and if I hear literally anyone say “BUT THE DEATHRGIPPERS WERE BAD AND EVIL AND BLAH BLAH BLAH, my eyes are literally going to roll into the back of my head so far that I am going to make actual eye contact with the demon that controls the meat puppet that is my body. I don’t want to hear this comment because they are WILD ANIMALS and literally an animal cannot be good or evil please stop pushing that onto the dragons because that is an incredibly toxic and harmful way to view an animal species. So yeah, this alone knocked off a LOT of points from me because there was actually no reason for them to do this.

My 2nd biggest issue is OH MY GOD CAN THUNDER STOP BEING A DAMSEL IN DISTRESS. The whole poison dart episode was the worst and it was so eye rolling that I could hardly enjoy it. We get it, Thunder needs special attention and saved every other episode. Let’s move past it because it’s so boring that it’s starting to hurt his character for me.

My last big issue is that for a season that introduces the Realm of Giants, we...didn’t see the realm??? What was the point of that? We saw hardly any of it and though we got the Octofin and the Shellfire, we didn’t get to see much else. Of course, I didn’t get my bewilderbeast either, so that’s a bummer.

My last petty, but still an issue is that they’re starting to force this Tom and Jun romance. I’m not against there being a romance, especially for these two, but it’s starting to feel more like a “Hey, here’s a main male and female character, so let’s make sure they have apparent crushes on each other for reasons” instead of working up a more believable romance.

As for good points, characters outside of Tom are getting some good development and D’Angelo is quickly rising to my top favorite character. Jun, also being my least and actually disliked character starting out is starting to really build and I actually like her a lot more now. Also, the humor in this series has also gotten a lot better, too. I’m loving it.

I think the BEST points for this season are the villains, however. Actions are starting to have real consequences and are things that can’t be solved in just a single day with a teenager’s big idea. Also Buzzsaw is FINALLY worth having in the series. He’s becoming a much more formidable villain who is doing actual damage and thus making his time in the series much more interesting. The cliffhanger for the series is the best one so far. Sledkin is also becoming a very enjoyable villain instead of just the “shady co-worker”. And Dagur being canon means that RTTE is canon to TNR, so that is AMAZING.

All in all, I give this season a 7/10. It’s shaping up nicely, but the deathgripper deaths and thunder hurt it a lot.

[pocketstoriesstore]

NSFW +18

You found your old job partner. And that’s how it goes on.

“Well, didn’t expect to see you here…”

You had to visit the old office to take some archives for your boss. You decided to make it silently, cuz you didn’t want to see anyone of your old team, including him, who decided to do the very same and take documents of some old missions for his leader, in the very same time.

Leon listened to you, sitting in his old chair. Eyes reading every step closer you took.

“Two years ago you left, didn’t say a word to anyone, so i’m pretty sure you didn’t expect to see me anywhere for the next decades…”

You felt your face melting.

It was good to feel all the frustration in his voice, especially when you thought he wouldn’t care if you were close or far from him. That’s what you used to feel since the last time you both been together.

It was a fast mission and your team was the administrative part of it, so you only got to see each other in the end of the day, like, conversations and stuff, while congratulating him and the rest of the team for the successful mission. You both locked eyes since the first minute of the meeting, ending things in his bed as you both wished for months.

…

After hearing that, you laughed. Accidentally exhaling surprise in your voice.

“Well, i did my best.” You said.

“At what, exactly?”

“Well, i… You know, you had something going on. You and one of your partners, the long haired girl. Cmon, Leon. Don’t be silly. You know i’m not being a freak.” - You finally protested, feeling bored by the soft investigation on your arguments.

“What? what are you talking about? You left me on read for two years because you were jealous of… what are you saying?”- He now was on his feet. “I’ve always tried to get closer, especially when i knew you was about to move. You’d never let me say everything i wanted to, always cutting me off and vanishing. It was all because of that? Impossible!”

“Look, i really have to grab this to Gil, so i have to go. Was good to s—“ Now he held your hand:“No way. You’re doing that again. Being a freak.” You stood static, starring at him in the eyes, no blink.

“Please, it’s all ok. I just have to go” - “You’re getting red. Phill said you still have a crush on me. He said you’d never forgot me. Is that true?” His hand holding your chin, cautiously.

You felt your face chicks burning.

“This conversation is so weird. You must be joking, right?” You awfully tried to simulate a giggle, but was a waste of time.

“Cmon, you just told me you was jealous about someone i was TEACHING!” He laughed, playfully and proud of himself for taking that off of you without even try. “Liz is a friend, she was new at the corporation and i was his leader. We’re actually friends, but she has her own girlfriend. Ain’t it fun? and you say me that… We know nothing about anything in the universe, don’t you think?”

Your face was literally on the floor…

“Do you know what? I choose the perfect day because i didn’t meant do be through anything like that. What the hell are you doing here? What the hell are you telling me?” He laughed more: “Answering your old doubts before you go ahead thinking more and more bullshit, as you did for the last two years. Now tell me if Phill was telling the truth. d’You like me?” He was seriously looking into your eyes. He was a little uncomfortable too, you could judge, but only because he had to go on since he played about that.

“I don’t have to answer that.”

“Ok.”

You stared at each other.

“I’m sorry for making this uncomfortable, I also wasn’t prepared to see…you. Anywhere, but here?… impossible.”

“I missed you so badly, Leon. I’m so sorry. I didn’t want to bother you, so i avoided any gossip, and choose to keep those thoughts to myself. But i still miss you. I think about us every single day, every time. I’ve been so fucked up about it. But hell i missed you. In my days, our hellos and goodbyes and our e-mails, the meetings in the parking and everything. I miss your skin on mine, Leon. Are you happy now?”

“I miss all of that since the day we kissed for the first time. I miss you a lot. I’m fucking serious, girl.”

He got even closer and held your neck strongly in his embrace. You left every paper cautiously in your table and held him back, tightly. His nose shoved in your messy hair, and his heavy arms pressing your body as if you were about to vanish in any moment.

“Never, ever, do this to me again. Let me know things. Be mine, please. Please.” He said, kissing you hardly.

“Leon-you said in a whisper- Phill was so fucking right.”

And then he said in a groan, while searching for your bare skin underneath the fabric of your skirt, cuz you made the way easier for him to go on: “I know that, love.”

[jellymellydraws]

Masterlist ~ <<Previous Chapter ~ Next Chapter >>

Astarion x Dark Urge Chapter 10 Rating: E Tags: Angst, Fluff, hurt/comfort, slow burn, two guarded people fall in love so hard it makes them stupid

Chapter Summary:

Gale had spent some time studying the tadpole they got from the Grove, but his talk on its potential benefits gets snuffed out by Lae'zel. Rose needs to confront the gith about her reactions to any tadpole talk around camp. The party makes camp outside the blighted village, strategize next steps for the goblins, then take a much needed bath in the river. Privately, Rose investigates some scars she discovered over the last few days.

“I’ve been thinking—”

“I didn’t think you could stop,” Shadowheart giggled with a smirk.

“Like you’d die if you stopped, really,” Astarion added, a smirk highlighting his own tone.

Gale had been preparing breakfast, as he usually did. But before this very usual morning, he had an unusual several nights of camp where he turned a bottle in his hand. The tadpole within it wriggled, desperate to connect through the glass of its prison. Even when Rose had asked him to turn in early, he was adamant about studying the parasite which plagued them. She wondered when they would hear the excited ramblings of a wizard who made a discovery.

Maybe this was the morning.

“Ha ha, not so smart to tease the one holding the food,” Gale mocked, both plates meant for them being held out of reach. Alfira and Wyll joined the breakfast circle, who were chuckling when custody of the meals were awarded to them.

“Come on,” the high elf scoffed, “it was just a joke.”

“I don’t hear him laughing,” Rose yawned, rubbing the sleep from her eye.

Astarion clicked his tongue and put on his signature pout. One of many masks she became familiar with. Maybe they’ll stumble on a bag of holding so he could stash them all in one place.

Either out of pity or because he was well-humored, Gale extended a plate to Astarion. One she promptly swiped with a smirk.

“How dare you—“

“It’s just a joke,” Rose sat down with her plate of food.

“You cheeky pup.”

“Ugh,” Shadowheart rolled her eyes, “Gale keep the plate. If these two are going to start flirting this early, I’m better off without an appetite.”

“Feeling jealous?” Astarion playfully slinked an arm around her shoulders, earning a scoff from the cleric.

“Hardly.”

“Anyway,” Gale gave the elf his plate at last, “as I was trying to say earlier, I was studying the tadpole specimen we got from the grove. After what we witnessed the other day, I did some experimenting!”

Yes! She knew it! Time for an informative brief from Gale of Waterdeep. Today’s topic: the tadpole. 

“We know that our tadpoles are modified, but we don’t know why or how. An oddity on its own, but then we also have witnessed — first hand, might I add— that we not only connect to each other through these tadpoles, but also with anyone that has this brand of the ‘Absolute!’”

They already knew that. Well, Rose knew that. It was pretty obvious the day they ran into those siblings on the road. When they called her a True Soul, when Sazza changed her tune and became subservient. She quickly glanced at the others to read their expressions. Most of it was expected: Wyll and Shadowheart listening respectfully, Alfira looking up with her big doe eyes in admiration, Lae’zel also giving Gale the attention she found him worthy of (the fact he was worthy was high praise on its own), and Astarion looking bored out of his mind as he pushed food across his plate. Considering how intensely some were taking in the information, it was clear that most of the others came to a similar understanding. Gale was verifying what they already knew, which was better than him debunking it entirely. A small victory, she told herself.

“It begs the question, what more can these tadpoles do?” Gale paused to take a few bites from his plate. For someone who was eager to share his theories, why would he give pause now? Astarion, she noticed, had stopped playing with his food and stared up with interest. By the way the wizard grinned, it must’ve been what he hoped for, “Illithids don’t use magic from the weave the way that we do, they are in another league of ability known as Psionics.”

“Is that more or less powerful than the weave?” Astarion asked.

“Ah, that’s—”

“Does it matter?” Lae’zel hissed, setting aside her emptied plate.

“Well, yes,” the elf answered matter-of-factly, “if it’s more powerful, maybe we should consider tapping into these psionics that our wizard friend is talking about.”

“I haven’t finished—” 

“We cannot trust anything that came from ghaik, any further use of them is only going to turn us faster!”  

No matter the attempt, Gale could not regain control of his morning announcement.

Rose adjusted in her seat. Lae’zel might’ve gotten friendlier with the group, but the tadpole situation was still a sore spot. She felt her plate lighten in her hand, and was relieved to see Shadowheart was willing to hold her plate if she had to intervene. Gods she hoped it wouldn’t come to that, first thing in the morning.

“Hmmm but there hasn’t been a tentacle in sight,” Astarion continued while waving a forkful of food. He pointed it directly at the gith to punctuate his next point, “maybe this Absolute Goddess has something to do with that?”

“So you would risk it?!”

“Why not?! While I don’t particularly mind the little pest, there are some strengths that I think it’s taken from me. If it has something to offer, why not accept?”

“I see you like to flash a pretty smile to pretty faces— how effective do you think that would be once your teeth begin rotting out of your maw? When that hair, which you spend precious hours to style—“

“It doesn’t take hours.”

“It won’t take any time once it melts off your head.”

Lae’zel made her point.

Gale couldn’t find it within himself to continue the topic after that. Another conversation about their tadpoles snuffed out before it could really begin. Shadowheart leaned towards Rose’s ear as she returned the plate. Rose glared at the cleric.

“Don’t.” She whispered, warningly. Shadowheart leaned away without a word, but kept that judgemental face about her.

While they were breaking down camp, Rose approached Lae’zel. It was hardly the private counsel she wanted to have, but the conversation was overdue.

“Lae’zel,” Rose stopped in front of the perfectly packed tent, “this needs to stop.”

The gith glared up at her as she hoisted the bag onto her back.

“I thought you stronger than to let your infatuation cloud your judgement,” she accused, leaning close to Rose’s face.

The assassin stood firm, arms crossed and expression unwaveringly. Tone, even and calm.

“And I thought you stronger than to lose your temper so over a simple question.”

“You’re right, I am stronger. Perhaps I’m wasting time here when I should be looking for my kin.”

“Then why haven’t you done that? You’ve had plenty of chances to leave our little camp and go off on your own. But you don’t.”

Lae’zel snarled. There it was again, that temper. She made a great warrior, for sure, but one mentio of their peril and she unravels. Rose narrowed her eyes. The tadpole wriggled, connecting briefly to the one in front of her. It didn’t take much prodding to feel the anger, but somewhere beneath it she could sense something else…

“You’re afraid,” Rose realized, flatly.

“Never.”

She sighed through her nose, taking a measured step back from the gith.

“Lae’zel, if you want nothing to do with the tadpoles, that’s your business—“

“It is all—“

“Let me finish!”

The whole camp was watching them by now, it became uncomfortably clear. Rose shot a glare at the crowd, who quickly turned away and tried to look busy with literally anything else. They failed miserably with the charade.

“We need each other. If some of us want to pursue the tadpole’s potential, that is our business.” She lifted a hand to stop the gith from interrupting, again, “if any of us start to turn, you’ll be within your right to kill us. On the spot.”

She watched her expression closely. Though her words were fully sincere, she knew it was still a longshot for Lae’zel to believe them. But something must have landed true, because the gith relaxed her stance. Not her face, but that was a harder ask.

“The reason I haven’t worried about our predicament is because I trust you enough to handle it if we start to lose ourselves.”

“If that were true, why do you insist on entertaining the foolish thought of embracing it?”

“Because it’s clear that we’re not dealing with a regular mindflayer parasite— you even acknowledge as much. And if the goblins are benefitting from psionics, then we need to be able to counter them. I’m trying to consider all the options available to us. I can’t do that if you shut down every conversation that you disagree with.”

Lae’zel ‘chk’ed in response, tearing her eyes away from Rose in favor of the ground.

“Fine. I’ll hold my tongue…as long as I still have one.”

Alfira refused to let the awkward silence follow their travel. The casual strumming of her lute was a nice touch, even if it wasn’t appreciated by everyone. Particularly Astarion, who loudly protested the start of her musical march. It didn’t seem to bother the bard, who gracefully pranced to the back of the line as she played. If it wasn’t for the violin on his back, Rose would forget that he ever played an instrument. 

The quiet Artiste stalked to the front of the marching order. Gale was continuing to plead his case for the tadpole’s potential when an arm draped around Rose’s shoulder.

“What’s say you,” Astarion asked in his oh-so charming tone, “these tadpoles could prove useful, why not take advantage of their power?”

Gale looked like he would protest to the interruption, but he looked just as interested in Rose’s answer as the elf. She rolled her eyes dramatically.

“I’m not going to dismiss it so quickly,” she admitted.

“I knew I liked you.”

“But we’d be fools to dive in before we understand the consequences,” she eyed both the wizard and their mischievous friend, “it could be about as useful as a cursed trinket.”

“Ugh, now you’re ruining it. Go back to agreeing with me.”

“No,” she playfully rolled her shoulder, letting his arm fall off her.

The sun hung low in the sky, challenging them to travel through the night unless they found a place to camp soon. The lute strumming had nearly stopped. Now only a chord played every few steps, but softly at the back of the line. Astarion was beginning to whine, Lae’zel was ready to end his suffering (and hers).

When the trees opened before them, they were met with the glorious sight of a bridge leading to the gates of a village. The sound of flowing water graced their ears, inviting them to draw nearer. Without crossing the bridge itself, they stared at the village entrance. There was little movement at the gate, not even guards. but what she could see were the broken carts and motionless bodies littering the path in front of them.

Goblins were there, alright. As expected, no survivors. She could only imagine the state that village would be in once they entered.

“This is it,” Rose sighed with the exhaustion of a day’s travel, “the temple should be just past this village.”

“Might be best to call it a night,” Wyll added with a hand clasping on her shoulder.

“Yeah, I don’t think we’d be able to take on a whole village of goblins,” Alfira agreed with a soft strum.

“Let’s scout the area and find a spot for camp,” she commanded the group with a small smile, “preferably one near the water.”

Seeking a campsite by the water somehow managed to be an unreasonable request. But not impossible. There was a spot downhill from the village and right by the river, perfect for them to set up for the night. Maybe longer, depending on what they decide. The trick would depend on if the goblins ever left the village for their water, or if their source was opposite of their direction.

For the goblins’ sake, it better be as far from the campsite as possible.

The command tent was built around a pile of large, flat stones, large enough to spread the map out. Shadowheart cast a series of lights to illuminate the tent. It was more cramped around than it would have been with a regular table, but they don’t really get that luxury when traveling light.

Rose twisted the charcoal stick between her fingers as she stared at their plans. Lae’zel, Wyll, and Shadowheart were closest to the map, either pointing at locations or creating marks on their personal travel maps.

“The temple is a walk away, we should ambush it in the cover of night,” Lae’zel insisted, trailing a nail from the village to the temple on the map.

“I want to know what we would be walking into first,” Rose’s brows furrowed while scanning the map for potential options, “Escape routes, enemies— how big is this horde actually ? Who’s leading them?” She directed the questions to the whole tent. When no one answered, she continued, “we were under the impression that they’re working with Drow— but Sazza talked about a Goblin Priestess as her commander…”

“We’re going to trust what a goblin says?” Shadowheart questions with repulsion, “She could be lying.”

“Exactly. We need more information before we go in. If Sazza double-crosses us, we need to be prepared. No surprises.”

“We shouldn’t have any trouble walking right in. Why don’t we just do that?” Astarion casually suggested, leaning against the ‘table’ as he flipped his dagger in boredom.

The whole tent focused on Astarion, who was just now realizing that he was, in fact, the center of attention. Although, maybe it was not quite the kind of attention he was hoping for. Lae’zel opened her mouth to respond, but stopped herself. Thinking better of it, from the looks of it. Rose crossed her arms, looking at the elf who didn’t seem to be paying attention to most of their conversation.

“Elaborate,” she commanded.

“Um…” he stammered, holding the blade still as he looked between their companions and their leader, “well they seem to think we have some sort of ranking above them, so…oh I don’t know? We tell them we’re True Souls and that sorts it out?” He waved his hand casually at the grimaces thrown his way, “don’t look at me like that, Rose is the details person here!”

Chaos broke out within the tent as arguments about tadpoles and goblins took over their whole meeting.

Kill the guards.

Go around the village.

Monitor the camp.

Tap into the tadpoles (somehow).

Rose pondered any idea she could catch, and stared at the map calculating each move. Kill the guards? Well, they’d need to know which ones were the guards. Go around the village? Reasonable. But they didn’t know if there were any patrols that would give them trouble along the way. Monitor the camp? First they needed to get to the camp…hence the other ideas.

On top of that, they didn’t know when their luck with the tadpole would run out. But based on what they knew at this point, they had time. She had to believe they had time.

Okay…so where does that leave them?

Using night was not a bad idea, but they would need to be wise about it. The temple was a straight shot if cutting through the village, but there had to be other routes. Three of the pebbles bunched over their campsite were pushed towards the temple marker. She stood back and eyed the divided pebbles which made up their party. Next to the temple she quickly scribbled ‘Sazza???’

Where was she? The storm would have slowed her down, but they were only half a day behind. 

Another dark line was dragged from the village towards the grove, concluding that if the goblins were going after the grove, they would’ve run into their forces over the last few days.

Their information wasn’t going to get them much further. Not without proper reconnaissance.

Gods, she hated surprises.

“Listen up!” Rose clapped her hands together, reigning in the chaos.

Good thing she did, since it had escalated dramatically. Alfira had retreated to a safe corner of the tent, protected by Wyll who was between everyone else and Lae’zel. The gith was snarling in Astarion’s face, who met her with a balanced expression of a glare and smirk.

Wonderful…

“Lae’zel,” she began, tapping a spot on the map, “find a clear path to the temple. Use the cover of night to hide from potential patrols. Wyll, go with her for backup. Establish multiple routes and a good place to set up a scouting post so we can keep eyes on it during the day. We have more than enough people to cover watches while you are gone. We can sort out finer details after we get your report in the morning.”

“See? I knew she’d come up with a plan,” Astarion slinked away from the face-off, “now are we done? I’d like to take advantage of our riverside camp and get the muck and grime washed off.”

She waved him off, adjourning their entire meeting. Wyll and Lae’zel stayed behind to talk more about this scouting plan with Rose.

It was fascinating what could be learned by a simple wash schedule. Lae’zel didn’t care if she was joined by anyone or not. Expected. Most of the others preferred privacy, which worked out perfectly when they learned that Alfira was the only one who had soap in their pack. Astarion had disappeared after he left the command tent, but hadn’t returned. Honestly, he looked to be the type to take long baths, so it wasn’t too questionable.

By the time it was Rose’s turn to bathe, the soap had shrunk to less than half its size. Alfira smiled apologetically, as if she was to blame. 

“Unless you used all that soap yourself, you don’t need to apologize,” she assured the tiefling before walking to the riverside.

She maintainted regular steps until she was certain that she was out of view. Then it was a sprint to the river. She shoved the end of her torch into the mud, kneeling by the riverbank as she peeled her top off and tossed it behind her. The firelight bounced off the water, giving her enough reflection to investigate. Shaky fingers traced disfigured lines that marked her front.

During their night in the owlbear cave, she first discovered them. It was a routine check for injuries, but none had been found. Instead, she felt them. Cuts that had long healed, but too precise in their trajectories to be from battles. She refused to let anyone look her over until she could make sense of them. And tonight, she could.

Finally, in the firelight, with the river to act as her mirror, she saw them. Clean. Precise. Surgical. Scars that healed over incisions. Her stomach twisted as she looked at them. Heart racing. There was something terribly wrong about these marks.

Her breathing quickened, trying to remember. Begging herself to remember.

What happened to me?

Tracing along a line down the center of her chest. Her fingers curled, mimicking the act of peeling flesh back. Flashes of red crossed her mind. Drumming in her ears.

No, focus. I need to focus, damn it.

She took a shaky breath, stilling her racing thoughts. Okay. She could do this. With a gulp, she looked back to herself. Her hair was sticking to her forehead, sweat covering her brow. But she was in control. Full control.

An incision down her chest. The urge to open it up. Suddenly her chest tightened, as if she could feel her own ribs cracking. Somehow she could tell this would’ve been a cut made to get in her chest. Was it her heart? Had there been something wrong with it, once?

At the base of her ribcage, the line forked into two paths above her stomach area. She concentrated on her breathing, allowing herself again to follow her muscle memory. Curling of fingers, desiring to pull back the cut flesh. Her other hand moved downwards. To…her organs? Which ones? She couldn’t figure out those details.

The other was much the same. A long, precise scar stretching down her stomach. Another place to give access to some of her vital innards.

She wondered if she had done these to herself, or someone she trusted? Some of the cuts overlapped with each other, signifying that she had been cut open at different points in time, partially healed, then had been cut open again.

Another bunch of questions she needed answers to. She reached for her pack when she heard the rustling nearby. Instintively, she pulled out a dagger and threw it in the direction of the sound. It thunked into a tree, and the rustling stopped. Rose scrambled to her feet, pulling her shirt back over her head.

“Show yourself!”

Next Chapter >>

[thisgirlnamedblusy]

heyyy:)) i love ur writings sm btw 💘 could i request angst followed by fluff with laurel x reader (both adults) where reader goes out with her friends for the day because it’s sunny and laurel is at work and she gets super annoyed and reader gets sick of her jealousy

Yesss, here it is!! I hope you like it, and sorry about the language mistakes!! (Thank you for reading my works)

The sound of jealousy

Pairing: Marilyn Thornhill/ Laurel Gates x Fem! Reader

Warnings: Jealousy, fluff, angst

Word count: 2,320

Summary: It’s a sunny day, and you are bored, so you decide to spend the day with your friends at the lake. Laurel don’t like this, but you are sick of her jealousy

N/A: Requests are open!!! I love you all!! It’s quite obvious, but I don’t support toxic relationships, it’s just a fic. Don’t let anyone to make you feel sorry for something you didn’t do, or for going out with friends!!

“Thanks for getting me out of house, Brenda, I feel like I was going to have a boredom attack…” You sighed gratefully, grabbing your friend's shoulder.

It was a fantastic day of May and you were on holidays. Laurel, your girlfriend, was working and no matter how big that house was, with no one inside it was just a jail, a nice one, but a jail after all.

“How can you stay at home on such a good day?” Your friend answered, looking for a place on the grass to sit down. You sighed, setting your backpack down and spreading out a towel on the ground.

“Where are the others?” You asked as you took off your clothes.

“Oh, they went to Andy's to get something to eat,” Brenda replied, also staying in a bikini.

“Greasy wings and ribs, an ideal meal for a hot day,” you ironized, putting your clothes away and taking a last look at your phone.

“I have asked them to bring some salad, but I doubt they will listen to me,” your friend said, approaching the jetty.

“I hope not, I think they also fry the lettuce in there,” you said amused, before diving into the lake.

It was being a funny morning. You and your friends spending the day at the lake, you couldn't ask for more. The two boys who were missing arrived with the food. It was all laughter, splashes and board games.

“Hey, (Y/N), are you going out yet?” One of your friends asked, seeing you climb up the jetty. You mockingly stuck your tongue out at him and put the towel over yourself. You bent down to search your phone in the backpack. You had barely looked at it all day.

“Oh shit,” you said, putting a hand to your forehead. You had 4 missed calls from Laurel. To your horror, you remembered meeting for lunch during her free hour. You had completely forgotten about it. Your friend Brenda also came out of the lake and raised her eyebrows when she saw your broken face.

“Is something wrong?” She asked you, while she dried herself with the towel.

“I'm dead,” you answered, with trembling hands. “I’ve forgotten that I was meeting Laurel to have lunch.”

“Uh… I'm afraid there's going to be problems with mommy,” she told you, giving you a nudge. You looked at her furiously.

“I shouldn't have told you anything,” you protested, calling your girlfriend. “Laurel? Hi, hello.”

“(Y/N)? Where have you been? I have called you 4 times.”

“Yeah, yeah, I'm sorry, it's just... Well, I didn't have my mobile close to me,” you said, closing your eyes so she wouldn't get too angry.

“I called home and you haven't picked it up either... Where are you?”

“We, well, I'm not at home. Brenda called me this morning to spend the day at the lake and, well, I, I forgot about lunch... I'm sorry.” You were honest, you weren't good at lying, and you didn't like to do it either.

“At the lake…”

“Yeah.”

“With your friends…”

“Well, yes.”

“What friends?”

You rolled your eyes at that question. You knew how jealous she was, but she knew them, you didn't understand why that question.

“Well, you know, Brenda, Michael, Cody… You know them all, Laurel,” you said tired.

“Why haven't you told me anything? I’ve been waiting for you like an idiot for 1 hour.”

“I told you, I forgot,” you said, showing some weariness in your voice.

“Okay… I guess. I've finished classes, wait for me and I'll pick you up, okay?”

Everyone has flaws, and the worst your girlfriend had was that disproportionate jealousy. You could understand some arguments, especially if they had to do with seeing some past love, or being surrounded by hungry boys in a disco. But it had already been two years like this, and your immense patience was about to run out.

“No,” you said, taking a breath.

“No?”

“I'll stay a bit longer. I'll see you at home.”

After saying that, you hung up the phone. You were tired of always having to give absurd explanations and apologizing for things you hadn't done. You put the phone back in the backpack and went back to your friends.

“Eh, eh, don't start the “pokerRib” without me,” you said, sitting next to your friend.

“Has she gotten very angry?” Brenda asked.

“She'll get over it,” you said, picking up your cards.

The afternoon passed very quickly, and for a few hours, you forgot what would happen when you got home. You would argue, sure, and you tried to extend your return until you had no choice but to return home.

“Thanks for bringing me home, Mike,” you told your friend with a sigh and closing the car door. The bars of the house creaked as always. You would never get used to how spooky your house looked at dusk.

“I'm home,” you said timidly. There was light, so it was certain that she was already there. There was no answer. You peeked into the living room, where Laurel was reading a book, not even bothering to look at you. You cleared your throat to get her attention.

“I said I'm home,” you said crossing your arms. Your attitude wasn't the friendliest either.

“I've already seen you, (Y/N), I'm not blind,” Laurel answered, not looking at your face. You opened your mouth to say something, but decided to shake your head and turn away. You were going to leave the room, but you leaned against the door frame and gathered strength to face her.

“Fuck, Laurel, why are you that way?” You asked. Now she looked at you, raising her eyebrows.

“Oh, me? I think it was you who forgot our lunch,” she said, leaving the book on the sofa.

“I've already told you that I'm sorry.”

“You’re sorry? You stood me up to go with your friends to the lake. Couldn't you at least tell me? It would have been nice of you.”

“I didn't know, Brenda called me this morning and…”

“And?”

“I don't know why it bothers you so much. It was sunny, I was bored and my friends made a plan to spend the day at the lake. I didn't know I had to ask your permission,” you said, raising your tone.

“How do I know you're not lying to me? You could have gone out there with some bitch and that's why you haven't let me pick you up,” she hissed. Her gaze changed to one you unfortunately knew quite well.

“Maybe because I was having a good time?”

“Were you having a good time, (Y/N)? Tell me, which of all of them are you fucking with?” She asked sarcastically. Your body burned with rage.

“What the hell are you saying?” You asked, almost yelling.

Laurel got up from the couch and walked over to you dangerously, grabbing your clothes roughly.

“It seems that lately you forget a lot of things, (Y/N). You forget that you are mine, and that you owe me loyalty.”

You wriggled out of her grasp, breathing too fast to keep from screaming.

“I'm going to tell you something, Laurel and I'm only going to say it once: “I, am, not, your property!” You had already gotten completely out of control. “I'm your girlfriend, and I think I deserve a little respect from you.”

“You? Do you deserve respect? You are the one who constantly despises me,” she said.

“Do I despise you?” You asked rhetorically, while you pointed at yourself. “You know what? I'm sick of your jealousy,” you said, picking up your backpack again.

“I wouldn't get jealous if you didn't give me reasons to, (Y/N),” she hissed, making a feint to grab your arm.

“Reasons? I've gone to the lake to spend the day with my friends and…” you said, taking her arm away from her so that she couldn't grab it. “Look, it doesn't matter. I'm not going to put up with this anymore. I’m leaving.”

“Are you leaving?” She asked, lowering her tone a bit.

“Yes, I'm leaving. You can keep my stuff,” you said, noticing how the tears began to run down your cheeks. Her eyes began to shine as well, but she didn't say anything, she just nodded slightly.

You headed for the door, unable to help but sob. She was everything to you, but her jealousy was too absurd, and you were too tired of her obvious lack of trust in you. You couldn't understand your life without her, but at that moment it was your decision. Laurel ran after you, finally reacting to your words.

“Wait, (Y / N), don’t, don't go… I love you,” she told you, also sobbing.

“You’re lying!” You yelled. “You don't love me, the only thing you do is mistrust me all the time, you treat me as if I were something that belongs to you, and you don't even bother trying to believe me when I tell you that you are the only love of my life, or rather you were.”

“Please, please, no, don't go,” she begged you. “Forgive me…”

“It's always the same, and I'm fed up. Goodbye, Laurel.”

You walked out the door and slammed it, breaking the silence of that quiet spring night. You were determined to leave, but your legs gave out after taking just two steps. You looked towards one of the benches in the garden and awkwardly walked towards it, letting yourself fall on top of it.

A lot of things were going through your mind. If you recounted happy moments and moments like that, the happy ones won, but you also remembered with horror all your arguments, always for the same thing, out of jealousy. At first you tried not to care. You knew her past and you knew that being alone was her biggest fear, after all, she only had you. Perhaps having told her other kind of things it would be different, but that day your patience ran out, and you exploded.

You put the backpack on the bench and lay down, resting your head on it. It was a clear night and the stars were shining in the sky. You were lying there for a while, crying and thinking that your attitude was wrong, and hers too.

“I thought you were gone…” She was standing there, looking at you and disturbing your stargazing.

You sighed and sat up, shaking your head. None knew what to say. Her voice was the same one she used when she was sorry.

“Where am I going to go?” You asked ironically, wiping a tear with your hand.

“Forgive me, (Y/N), you're right…”She said, sitting next to you. “I know that I am very jealous, and that it does not make sense, I am very sorry. It's, it's just that I'm so afraid of losing you…”

“I know, Laurel,” you said, starting to feel more relaxed. “But you have to try to change that, please. I love you, and I would like you to trust me a little more...”

“I know it sounds like a cheap excuse, but I promise I'll try to change it. Maybe, maybe Dr. Kinbott can help me to get over my fears.

You widened your eyes. Many times you had suggested to her that a couple of sessions would do her good to begin to forget her traumas and her fears, but she had never listened to you. That was for you the definitive proof that she really wanted to change. You nodded and reached out to take her hand.

“That's great,” you said, intertwining your fingers with hers. “Hey, I'm also sorry I forgot that we were meeting.”

“Don't apologize, (Y/N),” she told you softly, caressing your cheek. She gave you a soft kiss on the lips and she stared at you very closely. “I love you, my love, I love you above all things… You are my whole life, (Y/N).”

“Me too… I Really do. You have to trust me, okay? And stop being jealous about everything. One day you’re going to piss on me to mark your territory,” you said, still with a certain reproach.

“Well, I can do it, if you want,” she said with a serious look and voice. You pulled away suddenly and made the most exaggerated disgust face of your life.

“Oh, my God, of course not! No, no, no...” You said with that almost comical expression. There was an awkward moment of silence. You were very shocked by those words and you looked at the redhead dumbfounded. A small laugh brought you out of that horrible mental image that your brain had created. Laurel was laughing. You frowned, but laughter entered you too.

Some soft laughter sounded on that bench.

“Did you believe it?” She asked you, trying to stop laughing. You crossed your arms and pretended to be outraged, but laughter prevented you.

“Shut up,” you said.

The laughter was disappearing and you stayed looking at each other, deeply. You decided to put your pride aside and lay down again, this time on her lap. You looked up at the stars again, while Laurel caressed you gently.

“I'm sorry, honey, I'm really sorry…” She sighed.

“It's okay, it's already okay.”

You couldn't say how long you were like this, but you wanted it to be forever.

“It's starting to get cold, honey,” she told you tenderly. You nodded feeling a chill and got up.

There was very little distance between the bench and the door, but it seemed like a long, calm walk, hand in hand.

“I hope you're hungry, because I've made enough dinner,” the redhead told you.

“Have you made dinner? Shit, now I'm leaving for sure,” you said, pretending to leave.

“Come on, (Y/N), don't be mean. I swear that this time I haven't burned it,” Laurel said, pouting.

“Okay, okay…” You said amused.

[winterweary]

@starry-miki tagged me in a 15 questions game so here it is! I ended up making a new post because the thread was giving me trouble with copying and pasting 😭

Thank you for the tag love ;v;

01 - Are you named after anyone?

Nope! My name is Hebrew that my parents thought was pretty.

02 - When was the last time you cried?

Tbh I kind of struggle with crying aksk like even when I know I need a good cry I can’t make it happen. I think the last time I cried was when I got the medical bill for a procedure I had done in January LOL love being an American.

03 - Do you have kids?

Not yet but I hope to have one in the near future.

04 - What sports do you play/have you played?

I did exactly one day of Cross Country Running in high school and immediately quit. I’ve always been bad at sports. Just not my strong suit. I was a big theater kid which still gave me plenty of a work out!

05 - Do you use sarcasm?

Yes though I have a habit of saying things as dry and straight as possible so people have to pause to understand if I’m joking because it tickles me.

But also I mean who doesn’t use sarcasm every once in a while.

06 - What is the first thing you notice about people?

Hmm you know reflecting on it I think I notice peoples clothes first. I think an outfit can tell you a lot about someone and I like to compliment people I don’t know so that’s usually a good place to start.

After that it would probably be their posture: are they relaxed? Nervous? Aggressive? I take my cues from that as to how I need to behave.

07 - What's your eye color?

Just a plain boring brown ;v; I’ve always been envious of other eye colors

08 - Scary movies or happy endings?

I mean I love a good happy ending but I have to go Scary Movies. I am the resident Spooky Girl in my community.

09 - Any talents?

This is such an interesting question because to me the word ‘talent’ implies something inate rather than learned as a skill would be. I don’t think I have any proper talents in that sense.

But I did memorize pi to 17 digits for a play a few years ago and I still whip that out at parties: 3.14159265358979323

10 - Where were you born?

In the Bay Area of California!

11 - What are your hobbies?

I collect hobbies as my hobby lol. Besides the staples like reading, cooking and video games, I also enjoy crochet, cross stitch, painting, print making…starting to play around a bit with felting too!

12 - Do you have any pets?

Two girl kitties, Coven and Cricket! Coven is wily and clever as a whip and Cricket is my big love bug. They’re both good girls and I love being home with them ;v;

13 - How tall are you?

5’3 I’m a shorty

14 - Favourite subject in school?

In High School it was English, and in college it was my anthropology classes. I was deeply considering becoming an anthropologist for a bit!

15 - Dream job?

I LOVE my current job as a historical art gallery manager. But if I had to pick a dream job it would be a food writer of some kind. I’d love to be paid to travel and write about the food and history of different places.

Thanks again for the tag! No pressure tags for those interested: @cyanide-latte @alpine-forget-me-nots @tixdixl @ramshacklerumble

[minimooberry]

15 Questions for 15 (girl idk that many 😭) Mutuals

thanks @druidberries​ for tagging me!!!

Are you named after anyone?

i feel like this is the dumbest thing ever bc like technically I’m named after my mom, or at least inspired by it, but we have very different names I just have the tamil version and she has the hindi version. My name means sweet melody and hers means melody. The reason I think it’s funny is because when my parents were getting married my dad asked his old teacher to come to it and upon hearing my mom’s name the first thing he says is ‘Oh her name’s Hindi so you should name your daughter the Tamil version.’ and here I am 😭😭

When was the last time you cried?

I literally have no idea probably like two weeks ago though I always got some shit going on lmao

Do you have kids?

absolutely not I’m in high school 😭 I’m still kind of on the fence of if I want them but if I do decide to have them I want a twin boy and girl and then I’m done pjasdhad

Do you use sarcasm a lot?

life is better when you’re sarcastic

What sports do you play/have you played?

I’ve danced for like, ten-ish years but other than like, badminton (and literally who is bad at badminton) I hate doing sports mnskjdksj

What’s the first thing you notice about other people?

Appearence wise I notice their eyes first, I don’t know if it’s because I draw a lot or wtv but I love looking at people’s eyes I’ve never met anyone without beautiful eyes. Aside from that I notice if they’re like?? comfortable talking to me because I hate the feeling of someone not wanting to talk to me I’d rather just back off first aksdjlasdj

Eye colour?

It’s the most boring colour of brown like it’s not even a cool type of brown it’s just. Desaturated brown 🙄

Scary movies or happy endings?

Horror movies with happy endings 🔛🔝🤭🤭 I watched this korean horror movie and they switched the ending from good to bad in the last five minutes and I hated everything about that decision tbh I’m a hurt/comfort girly till the day i die

Any special talents?

I don’t knowwww I don’t pay attention that but I am incredibly skilled at losing everything I put down ngl

Where were you born?

Toronto!!

What are your hobbies?

the sims (obviously), drawing, writing, reading, I like knitting a normal amount, literally anything to do with biology, true crime, failing at playing horror games w/ my friends, andddd I think that’s it? I’ve been getting into blender recently tho!

Do you have any pets?

girl i WISH 😭 i’ve been asking my parents since literally before I can remember and their answer is always ‘we already have three dogs at home’ like bae it’s been over a decade pls get a new comeback 😒😒

How tall are you?

6 feet tall 🥱🥱

Fave subject in school?

i love Science when I actually understand it I’ve always been into it which is why I’m going into medicine after I graduate like women in STEM core is going so hard

Dream job?

UMMM I’ve always wanted to be in medicine(well, ever since I made the decision when I was 7) but I’ve kind of jumped in between a few paths. Like I wanted to be a midwife, then I wanted to be a neo-natal nurse (still debating this one tbh it’s mad interesting) and I also want to be an anesthesiologist bc it’s cool and they make bank but either way I have to take the same courses all the same so it’s fine

also don’t know if any of yall have done this so just ignore this if u have and spare me the shame 🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️: @strangecowplant​ @crsentfairy​ @afrolotus​ @finnsim​ @sierraelil​ @simsyworld​ @shadezovgray​ @d4isy-nukes​ @buttertrait​ @izharza​ @helltrait​ @baersims @bnt0 @alt-simz @nooboosim

[jensenscomedyelbows]

Oversharing on the Internet

Thanks for the tag, Riz @lastcallatrockysbar 😃 This is so old I bet you forgot you sent it to me! But I like to SURPRISE people when they least expect it!

ONE: Are you named after anyone?

My middle name is my grandmother’s first name, and I gave it to my daughter for hers too 😊

TWO: When was the last time you cried?

Well, I haven’t today yet, so I guess…yesterday? I’m a crier! I cry at stupid stuff e v e r y day!

THREE: Do you have kids?

One.

FOUR: Do you use sarcasm a lot?

You know, I definitely used to, BUT…my kid’s an adult now, and I realize I’ve rubbed off on her in the worst way, because she is literally so sarcastic that I often don’t know how to take what she says, and now I haaaaaaate it. I mean, be who you are, but you might be annoying. I was annoyingly, heavily sarcastic for the majority of my life! #oldpeoplerealizations

FIVE:

What sports sports do you play/have you played?

Lol.

SIX: What’s the first thing you notice about people?

The very first thing? If they’re smiling or not. Like, I notice the FACE. I usually know pretty fast whether or not we can vibe based on your face the first time I meet you. Also: there are very few faces I can’t vibe with 😌

SEVEN: What’s your eye color?

Blue

EIGHT: Scary movies or happy endings?

Scary movie with ultimately, a happy ending. Give me all the feels! Dark ones especially! Terrify me, break my heart! Freak me out! But do it all then have it all work out in the end for all the characters. 🌈

NINE: Any special talents?

Absolutely not.

TEN: Where were you born?

Waco, Texas

ELEVEN: What are your hobbies?

Reading, music, Supernatural in general, Dean in specific, my grandkids, Barbies, Transformers, Hot Wheels 😂 and ooh, I love television in general. I’m rewatching both The Sopranos for the first time since watching live waaaay back in the day, Atlanta all the way through for the first time since it aired live, and Battlestar Galactica with like three YouTube reactors for like the 8th? time? Undetermined. Anyway, yes I love TV and have seen just about everything, including Reality TV. It’s been like…17 years! I’m a Survivor superfan! You’d be shocked and appalled at my massive knowledge of Bravo TV show trivia. Also I know Supernatural like the back of my hand, which should go without saying. I’ve probably seen it 10000000X 🩷

TWELVE: Any pets?

I WISH.

THIRTEEN: How tall are you?

Six feet.

FOURTEEN: Favorite subject in school?

English.

FIFTEEN: Dream job

Had it, won’t bore you with the details, but I loved what I did and I was VERY good at it, and the possibilities I’ll never know because of MS. #justfacts

I’m not tagging anybody, but I apologize if you inadvertently had to read this. Here are some flowers 🌸🌺🌼🪻🪷🌻🌹🌷