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edgeray · 1 year ago

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“LATE NIGHT DEVIL, PUT YOUR HANDS ON ME

and never never never ever let go”- Teeth, 5 Seconds of Summer

Mafia AU! Arlecchino x Reader Oneshot

Author's Note: It's been a while since I've actually published anything on here. Well, my gay ass is back with another oneshot. This one has been in the works for at least a month. I'm considering making a Part 2, but that will definitely take at least a couple weeks for me to publish (if not months). I wish I was kidding. School literally hates me and my teachers are incessant on killing my GPA. This is also a gift for @megistusdiary because it'll be her birthday when I post this. Please go check out her blog for amazing genshin wlw content (especially Arlecchino content!) Would you guys like this on AO3 as well?

Content Warning/Info: This is a long af oneshot (6.3k words), long af descriptions and kinda long intro, Arlecchino is referred to with they/them pronouns, implied female but no usage of feminine pronouns for Reader, general dark-ish content, pet names, Arlecchino is a lil scary, I've never been to a club so I apologize for the very inaccurate information, nor have I ever been apart of the mafia so also inaccurate, a bit suggestive but otherwise sfw, if I'm missing anything feel free to tell me!

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Monsters are said to have lied underneath beds–waiting to ensnare an unknowing victim–or stalk hidden among the depths of a closet–awaiting an opportune moment to strike its next prey. Monsters are fabled entities that are used to scare off children from bad behavior and are quickly eased from the mind by coddling parents. The mere notion of a monster shooed away like a pesky fly, swept underneath the subconscious like forgotten specks of dirt.

You know otherwise. Real monsters don’t lurk on the undersides of mattresses; no, they lurk both in the skies above and the depths below. They do not stalk dark closets because they instead stalk alleys in daylit streets. Monsters are very real, that you know is true since you’ve seen your fair share of them. You’ve met monsters in person–they’ve come to you before. Terrifying is an understatement for them, and each time one has appeared as a client, you’re no less scared shitless.

You’ve learned that even inhumane demons find themselves in need of entertainment; like the sinful creatures they are, they seek self-pleasure. And that is how you found yourself in this particular circle of hell, meant to serve and please demons, devils, and monsters alike. Perhaps it was a revolting job, working at a strip club run by a criminal organization but it paid decent money for being danced on the fingertips of whoever you were unfortunate enough to be assigned to.

If it was a regular strip club, being an exotic dancer would have been fine. It wouldn't be so bad. Lustful and prying eyes can be accustomed to quickly, and so are the flattering compliments and the awkward flirting by middle-aged married men. However, there was a difference between lecherous and predatory gazes. Here, you aren’t even viewed as a person, no, the clients here, those that come in reeking of smoke or blood (though sometimes both), armed with knives and guns on their person, see you as nothing more than a toy or prey for them. Even in the eyes of your employer, you're less than human in their eyes.

‘You harm our merchandise, you’ll pay for it,’ is the warning given to every guest when they first enter. Merchandise. That's what you are. And that single line of words is the only thing that assures you of your safety among mafia members, gangsters, crooks, and whatnot. You've heard that the organization behind this strip club does well in enforcing that rule according to other dancers, but you personally don't want to see if the statement is true. You've been here for a little over a year, and besides bruising grips and pulled hair you’ve surprisingly yet to be seriously injured in any way. So maybe monsters do have a little humanity in them.

You're quickly growing to be a fan favorite as of recently, which means more money goes your way, but you're not sure how you feel about all the attention on you. It's most likely because of how often you offer private dances and private rooms to clients. Whatever gets you the most money; the faster you make money the faster you can pay off your debt and be out of here.

Tonight is supposed to be no different from other nights. You perform on stage, you rile up the crowd, you get showered in tips, and if there is a customer that looks mentally sane enough not to murder you in private, you take them to the back. Except, tonight, you're approached by your boss, who informs you that the entirety of the club was reserved by the Fatui, a well-known mafia more powerful and larger than the one that backs you up, for some celebration. These kinds of occurrences in the club rarely crop up, but when they do, they're often the most opportune time to bag in an abundant amount of money. Big shots like the Fatui pay and tip well, but there's one unsaid risk that comes with this: as a mere dancer like yourself, your life quite literally dangles in the Fatuis’ hands tonight. The organization that owns this establishment can't retaliate against the Fatuis if they so choose to dismiss the warning. They can't even compare to the might of the Fatui.

Simply put, if a Fatui kills you tonight, no one could do more besides bat their eyelashes. You're not at all pleased with this predicament of practically bordering on death, especially when you know one wrong move with one too hot-tempered Fatui could land you at the pearly gates. Keep pleasing the crowd, keep entertaining them, keep racking in the money, you remind yourself as you continue your dance, twirling around the pole sensually, and the customers devour every movement with their eyes. The only comfort you're given is that you've heard the Fatui are quite reasonable and diplomatic most of the time. This is especially true for the Harbingers, you've heard, the twelve most elite members that serve under the Tsaritsa, and the ones that are the most exclusive customers this night. That doesn't mean the Harbingers are any more humane than the average crook. Having worked in a strip club run by the mafia and surrounded by criminal organizations, the more rumored something is, the more dangerous it is. They can be considered devils amongst demons even. That's simply how vile they're supposed to be.

The most concerning problem about the Harbingers is that you don’t know what they look like, only the occasional whisper has alluded to how to distinguish between the twelve. Perhaps, you can survive through the night if you try not to draw too much attention; let the other dancers shine instead and hope you don’t get requested for a private room or dance. That way, you can ensure you don’t end up dead.

Your time to go upstage comes sooner than you’re prepared for. Your hands are clammy, and your form trembles in a way that only happened during your first month. Both reactions don’t make for a very good combination when your survival relies on you not fucking up and disappointing criminal customers. As you approach the pole, just like every time you’ve done, you make sure that the crowd’s gazes are in the backdrop of your mind, and instead, fixate on repeating the movements you’ve been taught and have mastered with your experience. Bet your survival on the provocative sway of your hips, the practiced showcase of your legs, and the allure of your dancing form. Beguile the crowd, but not too much, just enough to wow them. From what you can tell by the volume of the crowd, you’re doing a good job pleasing the Fatui enough. Your body stops tremoring after a few minutes on stage, and with one last final push of courage, you focus your eyes on the crowd before you.

Unsurprisingly, the makeup of the Fatui are men, though there are notably quite a few women. Either way, all of their attention is on you. As your eyes scan across a crowd, for one reason or another, you stop at a particular set of eyes near the back of the crowd. Intent, pitch-black abysses stare back, like they were trying to bore into your soul and devour every single motion of yours. They don’t quite hold the same ravenous desire as many of those before you right now, you mentally note with curiosity. It feels like your form is being calculated, in the way a predator would cautiously observe their next prey, a sensation you’ve experienced a few times, but each is no less chilling. The weight of their engrossed gaze causes you to shiver momentarily, and you snap away from their disturbing gaze to prevent any fumbling or faltering while you’re on stage.

Tonight marks the first time you actively seek out the same viewer while on stage, or even, during your entire time here. For some reason, you feel awfully bold, or curious, whichever two comforts you more, and unlike the meek little rabbit you usually are, you instead search for the viewer’s gaze. You find the pair of eyes with relative ease, as you remember that above their eyes are distinctive snow-white strands with streaks as black as their orbs. You take a moment to study them, and they remind you of a lion–or lioness–among hyenas. The aura they exude varied quite a bit compared to the other Fatui in front of you: not rambunctious, or arrogant; it's apparent they held an aura of indomitable authority just from the way they held themselves. Perfect posture with their clasped hands nested in their lap, with one leg raised over the other. They’re an embodiment of perfected elegance, however, much like a porcelain doll, they’re also expressionless, their appearance unmarred. You don’t examine the Fatui’s form for much longer because their scrutiny on you pricks at your skin irritatedly.

You don’t look for them again throughout your performance. In fact, you hope you never meet those charcoal pits again. You’re afraid that if you do, you’ll be ensnared by whatever beastly claws or fangs you know that Fatui hides underneath that impenetrable mask. The moment your time on stage ends, you rush back to the changing room to shake off your nerves. You sit down at a nearby chair, taking in deep sighs as you attempt to forget how you were stared down like a you were cornered, defenseless animal. And that is what you are, as much as you hate it. There’s nothing that can protect you from the Fatui. Maybe if you hide, never show your face for the rest of the night, they’ll forget they ever saw you and they’ll target another dancer. Surely, that will work, won’t it?

You’re able to steady your breathing before you can delve into a panic attack. Tonight, you decide, you’re not going to take any customers to any private rooms or take any private dances. You’d be missing out on a lot of money, but your life is more of a priority as of currently; not after the ‘encounter’ with that individual, you don’t want to think about how many more are just like them, hiding in the crowd like they were awaiting an opportunity to pounce on your vulnerable form.

Unfortunately, it seems like someone else has other plans for you because your manager storms into the room asking for your whereabouts before his eyes narrow on you. You immediately sit up, stiff as a board when he practically marches his way towards you.

"Someone wants you."

You sigh and shake your head. You should have known. "Not tonight."

He clicks his tongue. "You know I can't allow that tonight."

You bite your lip. "Just pass them to someone else."

"They're not someone you or I can refuse."

"Who?" You question with a shuddering breath, your nails digging into your thigh.

"The fourth one. The Knave. Lord Arlecchino."

Fuck your life. You might as well pull the trigger now. You’ve heard faint whispers of each Harbinger from the customers audacious enough to speak of them. The youngest, the eleventh, charming and boyish. The ninth, money-obsessed but a pretty looker. The eighth, elegant and cold, yet no less alluring. The seventh, as human-like as their robotic creations, which to say isn’t very. The sixth, is hotheaded and mysterious. The fifth, unknown. And the fourth?

Insane. Ruthless. Bloodthirsty. That’s how the fourth is described. You shiver at the horrors that appear on the forefront of your mind when imagining what may come for you. If you're lucky, you'll be alive at the end of the night, more than likely clinging to the edge of living.

“Well? What are you waiting for? Get ready as soon as you can.”

And you do. It’s not long until you stand in front of the private room’s door, your guest is already inside more than likely. The Fourth Harbinger is waiting, you remind yourself, fruitlessly trying to swallow down your stress. You can be dead the minute you step inside, this room could be marked as your grave. Whatever he tells you to do, you’ll obey wordlessly to survive. Just nod along, smile, and do whatever it is that he tells you regardless of the demand. You inhale deeply, regaining some ease of mind, before you bring your knuckles to the door, knocking.

“Come in,” comes a deep, flat voice, slightly muffled by its distance but what surprises you is how feminine the Harbinger sounds. Maybe you got the wrong room. You glance back at the room number plate on the door, and it’s the room you remember your manager mentioning. It’s the right room. Maybe someone else? You don’t have time to wonder, however, as you enter the room, knowing that if it is the Fourth, it wouldn’t be wise to keep him (Her? Them? You’ll just stick with ‘them’ now.) waiting.

“Lord Arlecchino?” You inquire as you enter the room, closing the door behind you. Sucking in a harsh inhale, you instantly recognize their distinct hair. It’s them. Your sight is immediately greeted by the figure sitting on the couch before you, sitting in exactly the same way you discovered them–crossed-legged and lounging back with unfaltering confidence. The Knave wears a scarlet blazer over a black compressed turtleneck, with a matching set of crimson leggings. Upon closer inspection, you’re able to make out red irises in their jet-black eyes. Despite the blatant and literal red flag, something about their appearance draws you in even when they scream danger. They’re… you’re not quite sure how to describe them. You admire the unblemished and pale skin, their elegant and rugged demeanor is like the perfect balance between femininity and masculinity. Are they beautiful, or are they handsome? You think both.

Arlecchino stares back at you like they’re considering devouring you then and there. You can’t suppress the shudder that runs down your spine. You’re a sheep before a wolf. There’s something so chilling about them that even with your experience with other clients, none has ever made you feel this way with just their mere gaze alone. This is what separates the average crook from one of the most powerful mafia members you've ever heard of.

You wait for a response but they only continue to observe you. You take the silence as confirmation to your question and that they’re anticipating something from you. Biting back a sigh of resignation, your hands hook underneath the band of your bra top and you lift it just the slightest amount before a cutting voice makes you freeze.

“What are you doing?” the Harbinger demands, their tone chilling and apathetic, making you want to shrink in yourself immediately. Your blood pumps loudly in your ears and your hands tremble a bit. Something about how designing their gaze makes you suddenly self-aware in a way you’ve never felt before another client–you’re practically half-naked in front of them with your skimpy bra top, undergarments, and fishnets and now is the only moment that you've actually considered how little covering is on you.

Why are they stopping you? Isn’t this what they wanted you to do? Or maybe they just want to do it themselves. Those types of customers always have the most bruising of grips and suffocating of holds. You stiffen at the notion. How are you going to survive this night with a Fatui Harbinger of all things? How many of your limbs are going to be fractured and how many of your bones are going to end up broken?

“I…I’m undressing,” your meek voice sounds out and you hate the crack in your speech. The Harbinger continues to scrutinize you. You don’t dare continue disrobing yourself.

There are several beats of wordless response before they then stand up from the couch.

Oh shit. You’ve fucked up. Are they going to kill you now? Is this your end?

Every thought is telling you to run in the opposite direction as they stalk up to you, but you're petrified as you realize with a chill that they’re taller than you. You’re not short by any means, a bit above average height, but they tower over you, looking down at you from above and casting judgment on you like a god. Once they stride toward you, you avoid eye contact by looking straight, observing their neck and clavicle that protrudes from underneath the fabric. You tense when they raise a hand, their manicured fingers placing themselves underneath your chin and long, carmine nails dig into the underside of your jaw, making you wince. They forcefully tilt your head, raising your focus onto their face.

It’s like they plunged their hands down your throat and ripped out the oxygen from your lungs, leaving you unable to breathe. Up close, the first thing you notice is their lips, plump and red from their lipstick. Briefly, you wonder what color their lipstick would look on your skin. Then your eyes travel up, red-crossed eyes gaze back at you and you gape quietly at the distinct shape of their pupils. You swear that their pupils flash red as you finally lock eye contact with them.

“Did I tell you to?” Their tone is cold compared to the strange softness of their handsome (beautiful?) face.

Something in your gut coils inwardly and you want to look away, but their firm hold on your chin prevents you. You bite your bottom lip to repress a whimper. You’re delicate glass in their hands, and they can break you so, so easily.

“No, sir.�� Only the numerous times you’ve said this phrase ensures you don’t stumble over your words. They don’t answer promptly, but as they observe your features, their lips quirk up the slightest amount.

“You know how to address me. Very good,” Arlecchino purrs after several beats of silence, in a low, oh-so-sultry tone, and oh. Oh.

You’re not sure why, but their last two words make your stomach churn, but not in a discomforting way. In the way that lights a fire underneath your skin and spreads heat to every part of your body. You’ve never quite felt this way with another customer. You couldn’t believe that your body reacts this way just from a single praise but it doesn’t stop the pooling heat in your bowels. The chill down your spine still remains in place, but there’s an off-putting equilibrium of iciness and fervor generated from the client.

The Fatui’s eyes stay fixated on you wordlessly until the hand on your chin turns your head, finally breaking you free of their intense behold. Their grip slackens so that they can trace their nails gently down your throat, every inch of surface their fingertips brush against ignites a blaze on your skin. A shuddering exhale leaves your lips and it seems like they take notice because from the corner of your eye, the small uptick of their mouth grows. Despite how sensual and probing the Harbinger’s touch feels, there’s nothing lecherous about it–purely just intrigue and fascination. It’s a touch you both have and never experienced before. Cold nails rake against your throat, not enough to mark or scratch, but enough to invoke shivers.

You’re aware you should be terrified, but for a reason you can’t pin down, you can’t jerk away from their touch. You try to reason with yourself it was only because you’re one upset away from getting yourself killed but that reasoning falls apart when their hand gingerly traces your jawline and you make the softest of groans, a barely audible noise of content. Unfortunately for you, the sound seems to have reached Arlecchino’s ears and their expression softens slightly: their eyes narrow less and their brows aren’t as creased. And that smirk–if you could even call it that from how faint it is–becomes a half-smirk.

They pull their hand away and your trance is broken, reality returning back to you as you remember that the person before you is still a Fatui Harbinger, no matter how bizarrely melting their touch was. They turn on their heel and walk towards the couch in front of you; the slightest bit of heaviness is placed on your heart. You remain stationary where you are, observing them as they seat themselves gracefully on the couch, and their attention encounters yours again. Their black pits hold expectancy in them. At first, you’re clueless as to what the criminal desires from you, but then their legs spread apart, an inviting gesture that beckons you and every rational thought leaves your easily swayed mind. Your heart skips a beat, and you're sure this time it's not out of trepidation.

Even if you didn’t command them to, your legs would take you to their seating figure. You stand before them, feeling blatantly disrespectful to look down at Arlecchino, but you await their order. They lean back, lounging laxly against the couch, their posture never lacking their usual self-assurance. It only ties the knot in your gut tighter. You’re aware of what they’re instructing you to do, but the absent confirmation makes you hesitant. It seems like the Knave picks up on this because the room echoes with one definitive spouted word from their lips, authority and dominance ringing through their husky voice.

“Sit.”

Your legs buckle underneath you from the one-worded response, the demand only stoking the consuming fire inside you. Eager to please, you perch yourself on their lap, straddling them, your knees pressed into the furniture below you and encasing both of their thighs between your own.

Oh, you think to yourself as your legs make contact with their thighs. They're firm. And for some reason, that provokes your stomach to churn in itself even more. You're so close to them, enough to feel their breath cascade against your skin.

As you seat yourself, you nearly clumsily topple over, instinctively grasping onto their shoulders for support. Their shoulders are remarkably broad, you regard, well-muscled as well. Their hands creep up on your hips, steady but gentle hands grasping on each bare side of yours to stabilize you. The heat that radiates from their hands is infectious, regardless of the nails that burrow into your plush waist. For the first time, you flush considerably, a sweltering inferno forming in your cheeks and your head fills with dizziness. Their touch is gentle–something you rarely experience with customers–so, so gentle that you would describe it as heavenly. How can someone so inexplicably vile have heaven on their fingertips?

It's not a position you never found yourself in. In fact, it's far from the first time you've been like this with another client. But here, as you're sat on top of the Fatui Harbinger, and red x-pupils search yours, a foreign feeling passes through you. Placing your finger on it, you dubiously think it's bashfulness, but the heartbeat that sings in your ears and pulses underneath your fingertips tells you otherwise, tells you it's something more. Against that, you remove your grasp on their shoulders and place your palm flat against the couch’s surface behind the Knave.

You squirm a bit, nervousness in your form as you remain as still as you possibly can, waiting for any more instructions. All you need to do is act like an obedient doll for them in order to survive; compliance is the best way of ensuring survival with people like these. You feel like you're merely eye candy from the way that their attention flits across your body, but you're immobile throughout the entirety of their observance. Being looked at is much better than any physical interaction. Their hands still cup your hips, but slowly, they descend to the side of your thighs, making your skin feel tingly.

Impulsively, you mumble out a quiet "Sir…" as strange sensations brush against your skin.

The sound surprises you and you feel on edge as their eyes travel from your lower half to your face. You gulp considerably. From their stare, they expect more of a response, a reason for their addressment, but even you don’t know yourself; it seems like an unconscious calling that just rolled off your tongue. You cow underneath their gaze, even when the two of you are at eye level. When you linger in quietude, their hand releases one of your thighs and lifts to your face, supporting your chin while their thumb rests on your bottom lip, unfurling it just the slightest amount to implore an answer from your now parted lips. Gleaming scarlet pupils grip your regard sternly, piercing into you and instilling you to spew something out. Except, you still can’t, now too entranced and lost in the crimson.

“Doll.”

Despite the pet name, it's devoid of any affection or warmth. It's a word that drips of command, a reminder of your place: simply a toy that they can play with however they want, a manipulated and decorated plaything for their amusement. That means you answer to them, and so when they request a response, you're under the obligation to please them. Your survival is in their palms anyway, if they wanted you to dance, you would just so they wouldn’t strangle the life out of you.

However, its implication doesn’t prevent the tingling shudders that wrack your body nor the involuntary clenching of your thighs around theirs. Was it the gravelly voice that aroused your behavior? Your cheeks flare at the knowledge that Harbinger sensed the physical reaction. It shouldn't be possible. It shouldn't be possible, your thoughts repeat, but then they're interrupted by:

"Oh?" Arlecchino inquires to themselves, a stark amusement in their speech. Their red glare illuminates slightly, replacing the lost darkening with a faint glow in their pupils, and the corner of their mouth curls up. It is only then that you discover something entirely new: that monsters can be sinfully, cataclysmically, terrifyingly beautiful and the sight before you is the most exquisite example. A devil has you wrapped in its claws and its fangs readied for devouring but it’s disguised as an ethereal angel; blinded by their perilous allure, you mistake their snow-white hair, their lustrous piercing rubies, their flawless porcelain skin, and their burning, fleeting touches as traits of a seraph. From a measly smirk, you forget the atrocities lying underneath their fingertips and dismiss the hazard their presence holds.

The hand on your thigh rakes its fingers up, red nails trailing across the surface of your fishnet, wrenching out a breathy gasp from you as they travel inwards. Tingling pleasure injects into your veins as you subconsciously lean in, imploring for further sensual contact. A plea sits on your tongue and nests in your eyes as you beg them through your pitiful expression. They drink in your desperation with a slow swipe of their tongue over their lips, and that single action is debauched enough to elicit a soft groan from your throat.

“Well, aren’t you an amusing toy?” They drawl out with a preposing rasp and dark abysses glint with an insatiable hunger.

They smirk enticingly, their thumb running across your bottom lip and smearing your lipstick on their thumb pad. Their grip on your chin tightens a bit, pulling you even closer to them before a shadow casts over you when their face nears. Before you can even fathom their intentions, they descend upon you, closing the distance between the two of you. Your lips are greeted with something pillowy soft and fervently warm, and you sharply inhale from the sensation. Every one of your nerves sings frenziedly, your muscles tense all over, and your heartbeat drums deafeningly in your ears–all of this as your body is engulfed in a fervid tornado of heat that makes you lightheaded with pleasure. It takes you several beats to realize the reason for this is that Lord Arlecchino, the Fourth Harbinger, the Knave is kissing–no, kissing is far too intimate, devouring–you voraciously like they're trying to rob you of any air, trying to imprint themselves on your mouth. Their mouth dominates yours, pushing against them with a deep fervor and famished urgency, eager to swallow every bit of shocked noise you make.

You close your eyes and allow yourself to indulge.

You first taste lipstick with a waxy flavor hitting your tastebuds. It’s cold against your lips, yet warm at the same time. But the physical texture and flavor of their lips are irrelevant; there’s only one true manner you would distinguish their taste:

They taste like sin.

The type of sin that’s chocolate coated and sprinkled with colorful toppings; depravity so sweet and charming it makes you reconsider the bounds of right and wrong. Degeneracy is far, far tastier than anything you’ve indulged in before. How can something so evil be so heavenly? Cushiony soft, placidly warm, flatteringly zealous, it’s like having a dance with a devil; so unequivocally immoral but no less gratifying. You question if they really belong to the Fatui because how can something like this come from such? You want to engrave the texture of their mouth onto your memory, feel this faux intimacy even when you’ve long parted. The Fourth Harbinger, you surmise as you surrend your will to them, is decadent–the only word that can be defined as both wicked and delectable at once–the perfect word to describe them.

The last remaining bit of reasoning comes to the backdrop of your thoughts and begs you to not be swept away in the heavenly embrace. You discount it in favor of accepting this godsent gift by leaning further with a weak imitation of their ravishing lips and pressing back. It’s a feeble attempt to match their insatiate nature, far too domineering and forceful than you can manage but they display a token of appreciation when they squeeze your thigh, indenting your skin shallowly with the burrowing of their nails. The action exposes just how sensitive you’ve gone underneath their touch and you reward them with the sweetest of sounds.

“Arlecchino,” you mumble with half-lidded dazed eyes in between ravenous exchanges and it evokes a depraved throaty growl from the Fatui, like provoking a call from a starving beast. They lean deeper to indulge in your taste. The gruff sound reaches your ears and it’s like a psalm–you shudder from its musical melody.

Their clutch on your jaw releases and their fingers outline your jawline before snaking to the back of your head. Well-manicured digits entangle themselves in your hair, and there’s a gentle shove against your skull that forces you deeper into the kiss. Your hands clutch onto the couch underneath you as tight as you physically can for any sense of grounding and your knees attempt to close in even more to feel more of their body against yours. The hand on your leg, in turn, caresses the length of your thigh.

Every graceful touch, stroke, and brush exudes an unyielding and infectious warmth that only adds to the stoking fire in your gut, and you’re bathed in so much swelter from the ecstasy that you feel dizzy. Yet, you never want it to end, you grow more addicted and drunk with each encounter of their lips. That, paired with your strained breathing, prompts your stamina to falter much sooner than the Harbinger’s. You let out a soft whine to signal your depleting oxygen, and their mouth unlatch with yours, pulling away despite your ache for more. With the separation comes a small string of saliva attached between the two of you, evidence of the shared intimacy that’s snapped when they lick their lips. The hand behind your head detangles from your hair and you silently mourn over the loss of contact.

You heave for air, your chest rising and falling rapidly. You’re a little perturbed when you notice that they’re not even out of breath, a small but firm reminder that they’re as inhuman as humans can be. That knocks a sense of reality back into you. Customer, mafia, Fatui, Harbinger, it comes back to you like a train. Here you are swapping spit with them while in the lap of potentially the most dangerous criminal you could ever meet, but fuck were they a good kisser–you’ve never experienced anything that came close to this in your lifetime.

Any foolish doubtful contemplation of the morality of this interaction is swept away just like that when you hear:

“Greedy little thing that you are,” they regard with the most cunning and handsome of smiles, discrete amusement dripping from their words. Their dark pits behold you entirely, the same way they have always done when it seems like they were contemplating what part of you to savor the most. Only this time, you’re not so disturbed by the notion. If anything, the swirling heat in between your legs suggests the opposite.

Greedy wasn't a word often associated with you, yet you couldn't more correctly describe yourself in that moment. Greedy. Greedy for a Fatui Harbinger no less. As ashamed as you should be, there's no use denying that you crave for their touch, for their gaze, for anything and everything they're willing to give you. You want everything and more. The more you contemplate, the more it seems obvious why you wouldn’t. Are they a devil disguised as an angel, or are they an angel that fell from grace? Regardless, they bring nirvana to you. An incessant desire bubbles inside you, your throat swelling up with an urgent request on the tip of your tongue. Would they allow such a thing if you plead? Would they be offended by your impudence? Would they punish you for such? But the necessity outweighs any reconsideration of your insolence and the supplicant beg tumbles out of your loose lips.

“Can I… touch you please, my Lord?” You croak out, wincing at just how wretched it comes out. The response from them is not immediate as the two of you stew in silence, a building sense of dejection inside of you. The expression on their face noticeably contorts, smile lessening, their brows furrowing, and their red x’s glinting dimly. Their free hand raises to near your neck and you suck in a harsh breath as their fingers enclose around your throat. The mere action sends a stinging reminder to your lust-dazed thoughts about their position, and a chill pierces you.

Mafia, Fatui, Harbinger, the Fourth Harbinger, the Knave–the labels cycle through your thoughts. Though their grip is lax, not exactly suffocating and giving ample space to breathe, their fingertips does acutely jab into your skin, a display of their impressive grip strength. You have no doubt that they can suffocate you with one hand alone, snap your neck, or, as your mind ventures into more harrowing territories, crush your skull. Those thoughts alone has you breathless with anticipation. A heavy weight suddenly appears in your gut, so heavy that you feel like you can’t move so much as a muscle.

Did you just go too far? Was that too much to ask? Was this how you were going to die?

The reflex to gag and inhale combat each other in your throat, a discomforting sensation that crawls up your spine while you tremble. You’re almost certain that the nails have penetrated the layer of skin, drawing beads of blood that’ll trail down your mark. You whimper at the prickly pain. Yet, in all your unease, the most masochistic thought arrives briefly at the forefront, and you can’t help but consider: this position is just as intimate as all the other interactions. You’re already so vulnerable in their lap, does the hand around your neck change your peril in any way? No, you’ve been a defenseless lamb to a slaughter the moment you’ve stepped into the domain of a menacing wolf.

Ah. Even now, you can’t dismiss the warmth of their fingertips.

“Do you still want to touch me when I do this?” They demand callously, their voice harsh and reverberating through the room. Their grasp closes more around, and you feel your supply of oxygen inhibited. Tears begin to brim your eyes, but you’re undeterred. Unlike Arlecchino’s, your answer is instant and breathless. Your eyes intently lock on theirs, the hardened expression enough to satisfy their question. There’s no need for contemplation. Danger, you determine, is addicting.

“Yes.”

The previously small smile stretches across their lips considerably. Content, or dare you say it, thrill writes itself over their face and the boulder previously pressed against your shoulders is lifted. Your throat is freed from their hold, but their touch doesn’t halt there. Instead, they rotate your head for you to face to the left, exposing your side profile to them. From the corner of your eyes, you watch as their face draws closer to your skin, hot breath cascading across the small dents her nails created. The one on your thigh finally leaves, moving to one of your hips, tender strokes across your flushed surface. They lean forward, and moist, plush skin meets yours. Lips traverse over the length of your neck, teeth scraping against, making you weakly groan. It takes all of your will to still your body, only allowing for the Harbinger to do whatever they desire to your form. Their touches are burning, burning, burning–so hot that you wonder if you’re experiencing a heat wave. Peppered kisses follow the edge of your jawbone, all the way up to your earlobe. A wet kiss graces your ear and then the most sinful of statements dignifies your eardrums, like a devil whispering hymns directly into your ear.

“I think I’ll keep you to myself after this.”

A short hum follows afterward.

“If you want to touch me, you’ll have to work for it. You’re only mine for tonight, aren't you? Entertain me. Give me a private dance, doll. After all, you have me for all night.”

---

Link to M-Alexa's amazing art and how I imagine Arlecchino to look like in this oneshot.

#arlecchino x reader #arlecchino x you #arlecchino #genshin x reader #genshin x you #genshin impact fanfics #guys I'm so tired it's 2AM rn #i have school tomorrow guys #i chose to finish this tonight despite the shit ton of homework I have to do #arlecchino brain rot does that to you #def worth it #genshin impact x reader #genshin impact x you #genshin impact arlecchino #genshin arlecchino #genshin fics #arlecchino smut #edgeray.writes #edgeray.blog

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notrapsplease · 11 months ago

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Werebear Halsin Headcanon

I have seen a couple other posts going around about werebear Halsin and wanted to make my own with some of my thoughts/evidence because I have been a werebear truther since I first saw the beefy elf daddy.

This doesn't really have spoilers in it, but I do touch on a couple plot points from the game. Fair warning! I also pull a lot from D&D itself, specifically 5th edition since that's what BG3 is built on.

This ended up being long, so I split it into a few different categories, they are in no particular order:

Quite large for an elf

We all know, Halsin is big. Large even. In D&D, elves are described as being slender and slight. Even if they are athletic they are not muscular and are lighter than other races of the same size (as in a 5'5" human will weigh more than a 5'5" elf). They are a little shorter than humans on average.

This puts Halsin well outside the usual elf physiology. When this is addressed in game, Halsin says perhaps he has some orc ancestry or "conventional wisdom is too narrow about what someone can or cannot be" (beautiful sentiment Halsin, you're still big).

Being a werebear offers a simple explanation for his unusual size. Werebear in D&D are described as being large and muscular, even in their humanoid form.

It's a "Wildshape"

Sure buddy.

Halsin's bear form is explained away as one of his druid wildshapes, but there are a couple things that don't line up.

First is the UI itself. Halsin’s bear form is separate from wildshape. It’s in the general abilities section not the class features. This might be just for programming reasons, but I still think it’s interesting.

Second and more incriminating, Halsin stays in bear form for too long. ACT 1 Spoilers: When you find Halsin in the Goblin Camp, the Goblins don't know he's a dude, they just think he's a bear. Even if in the stories timeline you're supposed to reach him the same day as when he was kidnapped, that's still a long time to maintain a wildshape. As per DND 5e rules: "You can stay in a beast shape for a number of hours equal to half your druid level (rounded down)."

So even if Halsin is STARTING as a max BG3 level druid at level 12, he should only maintain wildshape for 6 hours. Even as a Circle of the Moon druid, the time doesn't increase.

"I...lost the run of myself"

Related to the idea that Halsin's bear form is a wildshape, I need to touch on the parts of the game that indicate Halsin can lose control of his bear form.

My main piece of evidence here is that wildshape in D&D has no indication that you lose any control of your impulses. In fact, wildshape describes the opposite: "Your game statistics are replaced by the statistics of the beast, but you retain your alignment, personality, and Intelligence, Wisdom, and Charisma scores."

The fact you retain your mental stats mean you are in total control. There is no mental difference between a druid in wildshape and a druid in their humanoid form. To be in wildshape is a CHOICE the druid makes.

This is in contrast to spells like Polymorph which indicate that you lose your mental stats AS WELL as your physical ones: "The target's game statistics, including mental ability scores, are replaced by the statistics of the chosen beast. It retains its alignment and personality."

I bring that up just to showcase that D&D does have that distinction, if wildshape was meant to be something that you could lose control of, or let the beast take over, they would have written it that way.

ACT 3 spoilers: This idea that he can be made to lose control is also hinted at if Orin kidnaps him from your camp. Orin's dialogue from the kidnapped victim usually indicates a deep-seated fear the victim has, or their worst case scenario. Having kidnapped Halsin describe himself losing control indicates to me that it's his biggest fear. Which makes sense as a werebear, as a druid…not so much.

In contrast to wildshape, which is a voluntary choice the druid makes, being a werebear is a curse. Halsin is obviously in good control of his werebear self (I discuss this later on), but it is still a curse and can affect him negatively, especially in impulse and instinct.

Alignment: Neutral Good

Now I've got to talk about the werebear curse a little more. And D&D lycanthropy in general.

When someone is afflicted with the curse and resists it, they maintain their normal alignment but struggle to contain the beast. If an afflicted person chooses to accept the beast they gain more control over their bestial form, but lose their alignment to the alignment of the kind of lycanthrope they are.

Both Halsin and the canon D&D werebear are Neutral Good. Which means Werebear Halsin is in alignment with his bestial side, offering some manner of control over his transformations.

Only you can prevent shadow curses.

Werebear are described as being lone hermits who guard their territories fiercely, protecting their habitat, and the flora and the fauna from any threat. Sounds like a werebear might get really obsessive trying to rid his territory of, say, a Shadow curse.

Halsin and Thaniel's relationship makes a lot more sense if Halsin is a werebear. They met when Halsin was a child, so Halsin wouldn't have been a druid yet. In D&D druids are a learned class, more like clerics. Certainly Halsin could been a child in touch with nature, but why did Thaniel single him out?

If Halsin was a werebear though, he would have already had a natural desire to protect the land, the land being personified as Thaniel.

The werebear curse is described in D&D as usually being passed on voluntarily, as in a werebear chooses who they want to bite, either a companion or an apprentice. Werefolk curses also pass through bloodlines (as in you can be born a werefolk). The general consensus is if you are born a werefolk you will naturally align with the curse's alignment so you will innately be in more control then a bitten werefolk. We already know Halsin is Neutral Good, like werebears usually are.

This is a more headcanon-y part, but I think Halsin’s family were probably all werebear, or at least one of his parents was and from a lineage that had a history protecting the land Halsin grew up on. Knowing that Halsin's family all passed away, this could also indicate why Thaniel singled him out, maybe Halsin was the last in the werebear lineage that had chosen to defend the land Thaniel personified.

Either way, Halsin and the werebear align in the desire to protect natural spaces, and Halsin's obsession with the shadow curse could stem from that innate desire.

This isn't my first time recruiting a werefolk druid

This is meta evidence, but I'm including it. In BG2 there is a druid named Cernd and he’s a werewolf! What does this have to do with Halsin? Not a lot, but it shows that having a companion who is a werewolf is established in the universe. Cernd also establishes that being a druid helps to control a werecreature curse. Cernd isn’t feral and has greater control over his werewolfism because of his abilities as a druid. Also Cernd has magic items that are from High Forest. If that sounds familiar, it's where Halsin says his family is buried. idk the connection but it's interesting.

Final thoughts

I think that's all?? I also want to talk about why I think the Werebear curse wasn't brought up in game.

One of the other posts I saw suggested that the reason it’s not brought up in game is Halsin doesn’t know he's a werebear. I get that, I can totally see that, but I don’t think that does Halsin justice. Halsin may be a beefy boy, but he isn't oblivious. There is no way Halsin has lived for 350 years and hasn’t realized he’s a werebear. 350 years is a long time not to bite anyone.

I think the more likely explanation in game is simply that it never comes up. Halsin is in control (mostly) and not worried about it. He is also not used to having people who care for him (this is a huge part of his characterization in game), and probably has had to keep the fact that he is a werebear relatively secret throughout his life.

From a meta perspective, I think it was cut for time and content. We KNOW that a lot of his content was cut already (Sorrow, anyone?). There is also the fact that originally one of the other origin characters was going to be a werewolf, so they may have decided to ease back on Halsin being a werebear so she would be more unique. Then she ceased to exist anyway. Personally I think they should have included some dialogue about it somewhere, especially after deciding not to have the werewolf companion. I genuinely can’t FATHOM that werebear Halsin wasn’t the plan all along, regardless of if they decided to cut it. Alright I'm done. Werebear believers unite!

#baldur's gate iii #bg3 #baldurs gate 3 #halsin #halsin bg3 #halsin silverbough #werebear #headcanon

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raven-at-the-writing-desk · 9 months ago

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Do you know if Riddle, or Tray, ever stands up to his mother? I think i saw it in a Pinterest post once of teen Riddle being slapped by his mom and Tray taking him away.

His background is sadder than Shoto Todoroki from BNHA

We don’t really get to hear about how things are going back home with Mrs. Rosehearts outside of one brief instance. In 4-3, Riddle is leaving for winter break and mentions he intends on speaking with his mother, though he isn’t optimistic about her listening.

Trey states in the same part of the story that he isn’t allowed at Riddle’s house (because Mrs. Rosehearts has banned him). However, Riddle is still invited to visit him and Chenya at the Clover family bakery (though it’s very unlikely Riddle would be able to, since he hasn’t canonically seen Chenya again since the unbirthday party of book 1).

We never get a follow-up on how the conversation between Riddle and his mother went. It’s never touched upon again, and his mom isn’t really brought up beyond this case. (I did happen to write a short piece about Trey, Riddle, and Mrs. Rosehearts interacting though, if you were interested in seeing my own interpretation of this idea.)

Riddle spends most of his time at NRC since it’s a boarding school, meaning there are few opportunities for him to directly interact with his mother. Even if Mrs. Rosehearts were readily accessible to him, I highly doubt we would get to witness Riddle or Trey doing much to talk back to her. As we see in book 4, Riddle is still quite meek and uncertain when it comes to speaking with his mom. Trey, meanwhile, is generally very non-confrontational and may still be dealing with his own complicated feelings about interfering with what are family matters. (Recall that the last time he encouraged Riddle to be adventurous, it resulted in his friend being severely punished and Trey may harbor guilt over this occurrence.) I feel that neither of them would realistically develop the courage to talk back to Mrs. Rosehearts when only like half a year has passed since Riddle’s OB incident as opposed to like seventeen years of Riddle living under her rules.

***CONTENT WARNING: I will be discussing abuse at length under the cut, so please be advised to avoid reading further if the topic makes you uncomfortable.***

Regarding the comic you saw on Pinterest, it is fan art. That is in no way canonical; Mrs. Rosehearts may be very stern and have a temper, but she has never slapped or otherwise put a hand on Riddle. The closest thing we get to a slap is this panel from the manga adaptation, which isn’t even a slap. You can tell from the movement lines and the FWP sfx that Mrs. Rosehearts is just quickly pulling her arm away since Riddle is trying to latch onto it in an attempt to get her to listen to his protests. There is also no mark on Riddle or harsh slap sfx to indicate contact was made.

Now then 💦 There's something very serious and relevant to this ask I'd actually like to discuss, so I hope you'll stick around to hear me out on this.

I know none of us really like Mrs. Rosehearts (which is fair, she has done a lot of terrible things to her son). However, I think it's dangerous for us to speak about her as though she's a total monster and nothing more than a monster. I'm NOT going to stand here and advocate that she has done nothing wrong (she definitely has committed many wrongs). What I'm saying is that I don't agree with her being treated like "just" an abuser.

Let's say we do demonize Mrs. Rosehearts. We see only her negative traits and allow those to define her entire character. This creates a scenario in which she is alienated and dehumanized, left as a caricature of a woman that is solely known for hurting her child. But the thing is, this ISN’T how abuse really works. Few abusers are completely wicked people through and through. Part of the reason why it is so difficult for victims to leave their abusers is because abusers almost never start off abusive. They usually act totally normal, and the abuse often doesn’t come until later or specific situations arise. It creeps up on you in an almost insidious manner, and you don’t expect it coming. I’d also like to mention that abusers often don’t act with the intentional thought of, “Yeah, what I’m doing/saying is abusive”. Abusers typically justify their actions or convince themselves they are acting out of goodness. They don’t do bad things “because they’re bad people”, they do bad things because they think they’re GOOD people. Some abusers may even be victims themselves.

By painting abusers (even fictional ones) as cartoonishly evil, irredeemable, or always cruel, it makes it harder for us to believe the very real danger that we, whom we see as “good” people, could become “bad” ourselves. It makes it harder to believe victims when they report abuse because “oh, the abuse isn’t THAT bad”. It erases the idea that abusers are also human, and that humans have the capacity to be awful sometimes or to perpetuate hurt. It makes it so much harder to identify abuse because we’d only be looking for the most extreme examples of it rather than noticing the small, subtle signs. By “othering” abusers, it’s inadvertently denying so many nuances of abuse... which ultimately is counterproductive.

I would like to point out that even in the example provided of another abusive parent, Endeavor is portrayed with some nuance. He physically and verbally abused his wife, neglected the children he deemed worthless, and pushed the child he deemed to be his successor to the brink. However, Endeavor is also shown to remember a detail as small as his (arranged) wife’s favorite flower when she only told him about it once. He is notably much more lenient when training his first son, who didn’t have the ideal Quirk he sought. Endeavor at one point even confesses to pursuing being a hero in order to avoid the demands of fatherhood, which demonstrates a realistic insecurity and vulnerability… his humanity.

The same could be true for Mrs. Rosehearts. We only assume he is “just an abuser” because we see her in such a limited scope. There are valid reasons to believe why she is a “good” person outside of how we see her acting in Riddle’s recollections, and this may help to explain why Riddle feels so hesitant to “stand up” to her. I would really recommend reading this post, which goes a lot more in-depth about the complications surrounding Riddle’s relationship with his mother. Again, I am in NO WAY defending Mrs. Rosehearts; I am only pointing out that abusers—no matter how horrible their actions—have identities beyond the label of “abuser” that should be acknowledged.

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etz-ashashiyot · 1 year ago

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About Me/FAQs

You can call me Avital. I am a non-binary traditional egalitarian Jew living in the US. Any pronouns except they/them are fine. (!היא/את בעברית, בבקשה. תודה)

I really appreciate human interaction. That being the case, if you follow me and I don't already follow you, please send me a DM with the following:

What you want me to call you (internet name, username, nickname, whatever)

What brought you here and made you want to follow me

Something random about you that you feel comfortable sharing (pet pics are always welcome too <3)

I had a whole lot of other rules on my previous blog to weed out the faint of heart, but I genuinely don't know how well that worked, so instead I will simply put roughly the same information below as resources and recommended reading. Fair warning: I will operate from a baseline assumption that you've done the reading and therefore will not be explaining anything in them.

I also had a listing of my firm opinions and other miscellaneous information. That got long and unwieldy, but a lot of people seemed to appreciate it, so I will post roughly the same list under the cut.

The current username refers to my current symbol of a tree of lanterns in the starlight. This is related to my desire to create self-symbolism, old school style (like I really want to create a family crest, a flag, a seal, and other heraldic nonsense. Why? Because it delights me, of course.)

This page is under construction and subject to change at any time.

B'vracha,

Avital

Recommend Reading

For followers who are Christian, were Christian, are non-Jews who grew up in a Christian culture and/or have only learned about Judaism through Christianity, these links are very helpful in unpacking some of the antisemitism you were taught:

Better Parables (specifically the article about Pharisees, but read the rest of the site too, it's great)

Antisemitic readings of the Temple table-flipping incident in the New Testament

The current Israel-Hamas war and just המצב discourse in general require a lot of background knowledge to discuss intelligently, and not just propaganda. There is a LOT of antisemitism in the public around this topic and it is having serious real-world consequences for Jews all over the world. The mis- and disinformation is causing problems for everyone involved. Islamophobia in the West has increased as well. If you're going to engage in this discussion, I am respectfully but forcefully asking you to read the following sources. They are useful regardless of where you fall on that political scale.

There Is No Magic Peace Fairy

Ways to help: [1], [2], [3]

Muslim organizations advocating for peace, education, positive interfaith relations, and fighting antisemitism

This is perhaps my best summary of my own feelings on the whole thing

Is your pro-Palestine activism hurting innocent people? Here's how to avoid that

Please learn what Kahanism is, because it actually is what people think Zionism is. Zionism is simply a desire for Jewish self-determination in our ancestral homeland of eretz Yisrael. Kahanism is a type of racism that cloaks itself in Zionism but is fundamentally bigoted.

A non-exhaustive list of antisemitic incidents, attacks, and pogroms during [OP's] lifetime

An exceptionally long and thorough explanation of antisemitism and antisemitic violence throughout history

Why The Most Educated People in America Fall for Antisemitic Lies by Dara Horn (tumblr link in case the article link gets broken)

This explanation of the atrocities endured by Soviet Jews and how the legacy of Soviet antisemitism undergirds western "antizionism-not-antisemitism." If you call yourself an anti-Zionist, this is required reading.

An excellent overview of the basics

This is nowhere near complete information, but it's an important start. I will very likely continue to add resources as they become available and would love to create a primer on this topic more generally.

If you don't believe that October 7th happened or wasn't that bad, or really any atrocity denial please read this article from a reporter who was shown the actual footage, as well as this article documenting its effects on him.

If you are still in denial about the pattern of gender based violence, sexualized torture, and widespread rape as a war tactic committed by Hamas on 10/7, you are legally required to read this article.

About the blog:

I’m going to try my best to keep this blog to primarily Judaism, comparative religion and theology, with the occasional side sprinkling of queer & trans stuff, BUT it is absolutely a personal blog at the end of the day.

I talked about Israel and המצב stuff a lot on my previous blog and will likely continue a bit over here too. I welcome a broad swath of opinions, so long as they objectively treat all parties involved as human and deserving of safety, stability, freedom, dignity, and peace. That is apparently a large ask these days, and a not-small part of why I keep talking about this issue. Please be part of the voices that give me hope for the future, okay?

Minors can follow and interact but please keep in mind that I’m probably closer to your parents' age than yours if you do want to interact with me directly.

Interactions:

Rude asks will be deleted. Harassing blogs will be blocked and probably reported.

I consider anything even remotely in the vicinity of trying to proselytize to me to be “harassing,” or at a minimum, rude. Just FYI.

Otherwise, nice interactions are welcomed.

Banter is encouraged; trolling will be ignored

If you are a goy and want to argue with me about Jewish theology, you have to match my perfect score on this popquiz, no cheating by looking things up during the quiz. I learned Judaism as an adult mostly through self-study so you have no excuse. If you're invested enough to argue with me you're invested enough to do the reading homework. (To clarify: I'm happy to explain Jewish stuff to anyone who is sincerely asking or just have a friendly comparative theology discussion or whatever. But I have zero patience for those who want to argue with me about basic shit claiming they know more than me, especially if what they're claiming they "know" is not only wrong but antisemitic and wrong.)

If I don't respond to your interaction, there's a strong chance that I (a) have no idea what to say and am thinking about it, (2) totally meant to respond and just forgot after the notif disappeared, and/or (3) got incredibly busy. It's not personal! Please don't be shy about following up with me if you like. I promise that if we have a problem that is fixable, you'll know. If we have a problem that is not fixable, you'll be blocked.

I am currently learning Ivrit and am delighted to have interactions in Hebrew. Please feel free to message me, reply to posts or reblog, submit asks, etc. in Hebrew and I will do my best to read and respond to it. (Responses will be slower, but not for lack of appreciation of your thoughts!)

Anything else, just ask.

Hard stances:

You're not going to change my mind on these things; I've looked at the evidence, my personal experiences, and thought about them long and hard, and I am not going to be swayed by an internet rando. I can (often, but not always) co-exist just fine with people who I disagree with, but if seeing my posts about this is going to upset you, just do us both a favor and block me now please.

I am deeply distressed at how many people are choosing to live in a "post-factual society" where the truth is based on truthiness vibes and the politics are based on the quippiest of slogans. I don't care who's doing it, misinfo, disinfo, propaganda, atrocity denial, and gaslighting are BAD. There is no nuance here; these are bad things. They are bad if they go against your cause and they are bad if they "support" your cause. No cause is better than the truth.

If we cannot have a discussion where we are operating from the same baseline reality of verifiable facts, we cannot have a productive conversation and I will not engage with you. We can agree or disagree on a lot and that is fine, but facts matter.

If you cannot be reasoned with in accepting verifiable facts as reality, you need help. I'm serious. That is cult behavior. Get off tumblr and get help.

I don't know how to tell you that you should care about other people. If you don't see the inherent worth in other human beings' lives, I can't fix that. Go take that struggle to G-d and heal your soul.

I support the right of the Jewish people to self-determination in our ancestral homeland of Israel, the same way that I support other indigenous groups' right to self-determination in their ancestral homelands. If you don't, I'm going to need you to examine why Jews should be singled out of every other group to be denied this right or denied support in seeking it. That said, I definitely do not agree with many of the decisions made by the Israeli government, especially (but far from exclusively) regarding their treatment of Palestinians. I think both Jews and Palestinians deserve to live in peace, safety, freedom, dignity, and self-determination for both. No one is going anywhere; any real solution must recognize that. I tend to favor this proposal by A Land for All as an ideal (and given the grassroots nature of this idea, I think it could work pragmatically too, if the political will exists on both sides.)

I reject the Zionist/anti-Zionist dichotomy altogether for a number of reasons: 1) It impedes conversation because too many people agree but will never know it because they refuse to talk about what they actually mean by those labels and instead make assumptions about the other group. 2) It inherently puts the validity of an existing state up for debate rather than looking at real solutions for the future. You cannot unmake the state of Israel without widespread atrocities, but you can figure out options for everyone to live together in peace and heal from the collective trauma. 3) It also makes it way too easy to play Good Jew/Bad Jew and "Zionist" has basically become the slur de jour for "Jew." It sucks that people took a Jewish word for an important Jewish concept and made it synonymous with "bloodthirsty racist," but personally I don't think arguing over that at this exact juncture in time is helpful.

Bottom line: I'm a humanitarian and a pragmatist, and I care about all the people who call that part of the world home.

Update: for real, if you have trouble seeing Israelis and Palestinians both as human and deserving of safety, dignity, freedom, and inherent worth as living human beings, I don't want to know you. I don't want to talk to you. Go fix yourself.

🌻 I stand with Ukraine 🇺🇦

Free Iran from the Islamic Republic // Women Life Freedom

Abortion is a human right and should be safe, legal, available on demand, and shameless. It's a necessary medical procedure and it's completely barbaric that we're still talking about it as anything else.

Birth control, abortion, and no-fault divorce are actively positive parts of society and building healthy families.

Transition care is healthcare and also a human right. Allowing people to transition prevents self-harm and suicide, and has an extremely high efficacy rate with an exceptionally low level of risk or regret. We now have well over a century of data on this.

That said, detransitioners who are still supportive of trans people/aren't transphobic are more than welcome here, as any exploratory process deserves the right to say, "Interesting! But nope!"

Transunity, ace/aro positivity, and just inclusionism in general, 100%. Fuck off with anything else.

Queer might be a slur in the mouths of some people, but my identity isn't. Don't reblog my posts if you're going to tag it with "q slur" or "q word" or censored in some way. I'm not Gay as in "I prioritize cis men over the entire rest of the community" but Queer as in "my personal labels are none of your business but my political stance on queer liberation sure as fuck will be."

If you don't vaccinate yourself and your kids for any reason other than medical necessity, and especially if you promote anti-vaxxer views and the associated pseudoscience, you are actively harming the most vulnerable members of society for entirely selfish reasons and that makes you a bad person. I hope your kids bypass you to get vaccinated.

Wear a mask 😷

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lenalenouilleisblogging · 3 months ago

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2024 feminist movie retrospective ~ day 6

YES. ANOTHER FRENCH FILM. AM I PATRIOTIC OR WHAT 🇫🇷🥐💥🥖🐓🐓💥💥🥖🥐🇫🇷🇫🇷💥

Watched : November 17th at my city's independent theater. The showing was.... I forgor.

Today i'm gonna take my time ; because to properly talk about my thoughts on Sauvages (trad: Savages) from director Claude Barras, i first need to mention two other films. Have you heard of Kirikou et la Sorcière (trad: Kirikou and the witch)? It's a huge classic of french animation released in 1998. When i was just old enough to focus on feature length films, this was the first one i became obsessed with and asked to watch on repeat. (even tho some parts really scared me) Every classmate i had my whole life knew this film and had grown up with it as well, it's a staple for my generation. So i was shocked when years and years later i learned that Kirikou was never widely released in the US. It was distributed by a small french-american company for an African culture festival, but not without some notes on the posters to warn the parents who would want to take their kids to see the film.

Why would they need to be warned you ask? Because Kirikou is a tale that takes place in West Africa, and it contains quite a bit of nudity. None of the adult characters wear tops, including the women, and the young children are fully naked for most of the film. Even tho it is never ever sexual in nature or really even the focus of any shot, it was a BIG problem for a lot of countries when the film was released. It was also a problem here in France while it was being produced (tho to be fair a lot of that was just racism) but it didn't end up being much of a problem with the french public. The film was obviously allowed for all ages as France doesn't have rules against this kind of content, and as a kid's film it ended up being, as i said earlier, a huge classic.

I used to date a USAmerican, and talking about this film i grew up with and love was quite the cultural shock. My ex was shocked by the content of the film, and kept being shocked by different elements of other french kid classics i introduced them to. This really made me realise like few things had before just how sanitised art is in certain countries and it was a bit depressing. I'm really happy that i grew up with the things i did, and i'm really glad France is still producing content that appeals to kids without treating them like idiots. Case in point : the second movie i wanna talk about, Ma Vie de Courgette (trad: My Life as a Zucchini).

This was Claude Barras's first film, and a huge critical success when it came out. I'm not gonna dwell on it too much as this is getting too long, but it was, well, very french as well. The movie didn't show anything explicit, but it was about very dark and serious issues, and didn't shy away from any of them. Back when it came out, i read some reviews from foreign watchers online, and with the way they spoke about it, i thought "holy shit! This must be the darkest, grimmest film of the year?!" Then i watched it, and i was like "oh okay, this is just a french film lol." A lot of people from english speaking countries just aren't used to serious subjects in animated films, much less in animated films that are marketed towards all audiences. The film takes place in an orphanage and the kids talk about why they have to live here. One is the son of drug addicts, one is the daughter of an illegal immigrant who got deported, one's dad is now in jail for doing "weird and disgusting things to her that gave her nightmares", etc. It's all very serious, yet the vocabulary and presentation is very kid friendly. I don't hang out with many kids these days, but i know the film was really popular for school movie trips.

This all very much applies to today's film, Sauvages. Like Ma Vie de Courgette, it is stop-motion animated with figures, and you can really tell the team benefited from a huge budget increase. The previous one was already super well made, but this one is just stunning to look at. Every shot is full to the brim with incredible details that are all the more impressive considering this is claymation. The acting is great all around and the dialogues feel super real. The movie has no original soundtrack, but great sound design. The only musics you'll hear will be the musical selection of french classics the characters listen to.

The story takes place in Borneo and follows Kéria, a young girl who was born in an indigenous Penan community. Since her mother passed away, her father moved to the city and works in a palm oil plantation. She's now just a typical angsty tween who goes to her christian school and doesn't really remember her heritage. Her father and her rescue a baby orangutan from woodcutters who just killed its mom. Kéria gets very attached to the baby so when it runs away to follow her Penan cousin Selaï into the forest, she follow them. The rest of the film follows the two kids as they make their way through the nature and end up facing woodcutters who are trying to displace the local Penan community.

The movie's message is super well done. I expected it to be mostly about environmentalism, but turns out this is more about the protection of native communities. The film is honestly really subtle and doesn't beat you over the head with it, and it always remains very fun. The baby ape is just adorable and some of his facial expressions reminded me of Wallace and Gromit's animation. The characters feel very real and likeable, and the film has a great sense of flow. The 90 minutes honestly flew by. The movie is pretty light-hearted for most of it but it has its moments! (well, just ONE moment at the end that honestly shocked me a bit because of how unexpected it was)

As for everything i mentioned at the beginning of this post, some parts get really serious, and then there's also the nudity. We see breastfeeding, we see casual female nudity in multiple contexts and it always feel natural. Now. Why do i keep bringing this up? Well, non-sexual female nudity is super important for representation, and, i think, even more so in pieces of art made for a younger audience.

Breasts are not inherently sexual. The female chest in general is not inherently sexual. Yet we sell bikinis for girls who are literally not old enough to walk yet. We're so backwards that a woman being bare-chested in public is associated with extremist radical feminism. It's just our bodies. I think showing little things like this (because let's be clear, it IS just a little thing. You're not going to see tits in every shot.) to kids is super healthy. It's a great message for little boys and especially little girls.

In short, i recommend not only Sauvages but also the two other films i talked about today. It's entertaining, it's emotional, it's educative, it's very pretty to look at, it has a FANTASTIC ending. It's a very enjoyable watch as an adult, and i also recommend them for kids 7 and up if there's any sibling or cousin you do movie nights with.

Final rating : MONKEEEEEE/10

This film gets the official Léna seal of approval! It's one of the best of 2024! Here's a link to the trailer. Here's also the trailer for Ma Vie de Courgette (with subtitles! :D)

#radblr #radical feminism #review tag #movie tag #film yapping tag

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cdroloisms · 9 months ago

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read your post about how the atmosphere in dreblr feels a little tense nowadays. honestly when i first joined this fandom i was excited to share takes/meta but i dont do it much anymore cause of how intense ppl get when they disagree… wasnt prepared for that level of intensity

i have to say that my experience with this fandom and your experience with this fandom are ... probably pretty different 😅 (not that i know for sure, of course, so sorry abt any inherent assumptions to when you joined the fandom, i've just been here for damn near forever) and that that'll color my perspective on this, so. fair warning in advance.

to be honest, disagreement in dreblr is not a new thing. when dreblr was created there were two main "camps" of c!dream apologism that disagreed on pretty much everything to do with c!dream after novermber 16th and would write essays debunking each other's takes pretty goddamn often. here's an old post by red responding to a lot of opinions on both sides of the line which i think illustrates this well -- note the difference established between "c!dream apologists" and "c!dream enthusiasts," perhaps better known now as the "trauma interpretation" and "strategist interpretation" of c!dream back before the confirmation of staged finale during the prison break, which shows how different people's opinions of c!dream ranged at dreblr's very conception. and this disagreement ran pretty damn deep, too, lmao--some of it was reserved to debating each other in semiprivate discord servers, but plenty of it was made of vagueing each other's takes or directly debating them on each other's blogs.

i think that a source of friction, to be honest, is that dreblr started as a much more analysis- and meta-focused community than it is now. the entire dsmp fandom was very analysis-heavy in 2021-2022, and dreblr definitely reflected that culture; since the dsmp ended, the amount of active discussion about it in a meta sense has also waned, and as such dreblr and many other areas of dsmp fandom have been more focused on other kinds of fanwork. this isn't a bad thing, of course! but it has led to a shift in etiquette, and while i think meta etiquette and fanwork etiquette are very. very different things, obviously the amount of fanwork and the amount of meta that's around in dreblr spaces influences how people interact with all parts of dreblr etc etc that's just how people and communities work

but back to my point. disagreement has always been a part of this fandom, especially in meta spaces (which used to be pretty much all of dreblr, but has kind of become more of a small part of it in more recent times) and intensity with those disagreements also is kind of ... on par for the course? i mean, personally, i think disagreements ran more intense in dreblr in 2021 on average--it's not like dreblr has been as sharply divided with different "versions" of c!dream apologism since--and when it comes to the general fandom, well, any look at the inbox of anyone posting c!dream positive analysis and the formation of dreblr as a whole speak for themselves. also IFUADA and the whole attempt to like, lmanburg us out of our own house. which was hilarious btw that shit was awesome

like, at the end of the day, meta is made to be a place where people are gonna disagree. and a lot of people in meta spaces find it fun to disagree, even; there are more than a few people who will devil's advocate an argument they don't even agree with just for the sake of disagreement and debate. fandom analysis is just ... like, fandom academia lite, and it's also far less beholden to the rules of professionalism in real academia (not that real academia is free of conflict, obviously. including extremely petty conflict, as anyone who has read enough passive-aggressive as shit academic papers will tell you). this isn't to say that things don't go too far, because again, the history of this fandom proves it LOL. but while we all want people to feel comfortable in meta spaces, we also want meta spaces to be a place for people to be passionate about their opinions and to disagree about them fervently and to debate to their heart's content, bc that's kind of the point of fandom meta, yk?

in my post, i mentioned that i think more open disagreement will be good for dreblr, and i do stand by this point; i think that there's no real point in trying to stamp out disagreement in a space meant to be a free place for people to disagree and express their disagreements, not that that's what you're saying or anything just as a general thought. i also think that more disagreement will help with there feeling like there's less of a "correct" way to think about c!dream and the server, which i think raises the barrier of entry for people who want to post meta but don't want to be eviscerated bc they said something "wrong." of course, i can't force anyone to post meta nor do i want to--hell, i want to post more meta but am limited in time, and i know we all live busy lives 😭 (which is part of why this ask is being answered so late, sorry!) -- my point is i dont think, idk, one person being passionate abt a take or disagreement or whatever is necessarily the problem as far as upping the tension in dreblr as much as like. there's a lot of general discomfort and a lack of willingness to rock the boat in a place which should be a safe waters for everyone to take shots at any ship (er, ship to follow up with the rock-the-boat metaphor, but the secondary meaning does apply here as well) they want. we're shooting with water guns, not real bullets, and there's no fun in a splash fight if everyone's too scared of getting someone else wet, i guess.

that being said, anon, i understand that not everyone wants to participate in the free-for-all take pvp that is inherent to meta spaces...to which i say that, honestly, there's no requirement to participate in analysis spaces specifically to just, share your thoughts on the server. i think that in general, if anyone posts their thoughts on the dsmp and adds a disclaimer to the top like "not really analysis, just miscellaneous thoughts that i would prefer not to be vagued/argued against," i really just don't think that most people are gonna go out of their way to argue with that? you have every right to just yap while opting out of the possibility of being vagued or debated with, but you might have to make it clear beforehand bc vagueposting and debating is just the culture that exists in meta/analysis spaces, especially dsmp meta/analysis spaces that have been a part of dreblr since dreblr was made. and if there's anything else that can be done to make everyone feel more comfortable, i think that's worth discussing!

#my asks !!#disk horse #hope this helps? at all? pfpfpfttt #i dont want to gut dreblr of what was a crucial part of it from the day it was made honestly #and i want analysis to be able to thrive in dreblr now even with all the changes that have occurred internally and whatever #that being said i very much understand that not everyone's comfort level with this stuff is the same #i think everyone has the right to figure out what they're most comfortable with and stick to it!#fandom is for fun and if youre not having fun then find a way that works for you etc #but analysis spaces have been a part of fandom for a long time and have their own cultures and etiquette #and debate/analysis /is/ fun for a lot of people here

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ghulehthezombiequeen · 1 year ago

Text

stargirl interlude - sodo x reader

masterlist.

a/n: *cracks knuckles* alright first fic of the new year lets go!!! also li hing mui is dried plum and they make a powder which is put on almost every dessert/candy in hawaii! it's delicious and everyone should try it because y'all are missing out (ok maybe i wanted to share a bit of culture with u guys)

warnings/things to note: afab reader but no pronouns used, sodo says the L word (no not leprosy), talk about pregnancy (nothing happens though), he's a big goofball and doesn't understand humans' societal dating rules, slightly suggestive (he's getting baby fever due to his heat cycle approaching)

enjoy <3

word count: 944 ~

Sodo stared at you as you entered his room in the middle of the night, holding a bag. "I come bearing gifts!" you said triumphantly, causing him to crack a small smile. "What's that?" he asked, eyeing the contents of the bag. "Li hing gummy worms! You'll like it, it's tangy." you smile, tossing him the bag.

He caught the bag of gummy worms in one hand, his eyes narrowing to slits as he inspected the packaging before taking a worm out and sniffing it before nibbling on it. His eyes widened and it wasn't long until he shoved the rest of the candy into his mouth. "You're correct."

"You're welcome, ya goofball." you smiled, sitting next to him and holding out your palm. "May I have one?"

He nodded, tail swishing in satisfaction as he dug into the bag, dropping a red and blue worm into your palm.

"Wow, so generous," you joked sarcastically. "But thank you." You popped the sweet candy into your mouth, mouth instantly watering as the li hing powder coated your tongue.

Sodo continued devouring a few more gummies before he turned to you with a crooked smile. "I have a question."

"Yeah? What's up?"

His smile broadened as he watched you finished eating your gummy worm. "Marry me."

You blinked. "I- what?"

He didn't hesitate as he got down onto one knee and took out a black ring box. "Marry me." he repeated.

"Er... no thank you?" you answered hesitantly, looking puzzled. "What are... you doing?"

He didn't seem offended by your answer as he sat back on the couch next to you. "You don't want to marry me?" he asked, tilting his head to the side in curiosity.

"Um, honey, we're not even dating."

His brows furrowed as he thought for a moment, nodding. "So... we're going to date first? When can we start? Now?"

His innocence caused you to laugh, shaking your head. "Oh, no, honey, that's not how this works."

He pouted but couldn't hold back a smile as he saw you laughing. "Then when do we start?"

You stared at him, letting out a chuckle as you shook your head. "Well, normally... someone asks the person they like to go somewhere together. Like dinner at a restaurant, coffee, even the fair."

Sodo's ghoulish tail started to wrap around your leg, pinning it to the seat. "So, you're saying I should ask you out on a date? Okay!" "W-Wha- slow down!" you laughed, nudging his tail off your leg.

He moved his tail out of the way but was soon replaced by his hand as he pulled you close to him. "So. Date, now. We go, yes?"

"No, not now! Sodo, I swear on everything unholy, it's 3am! And get your paw off my leg." you tugged at his loose sleeve, lifting his arm away.

He frowned, slowly letting go of you. "But... but I love you." he whined.

That statement caught you off-guard, feeling your cheeks turn pink. "Er... S-Sodo, you, uh... you don't say that right away."

He shrugged. "I didn't know the exact rules." He went silent for a moment, tapping his foot as he thought. After a moment, he figured it out, eyes lighting up. "So I should ask you out on a date, we go to dinner and then I say 'I love you'?"

You giggled at his silliness. "No, we're supposed to talk about ourselves at dinner, see if we're compatible for each other. That word doesn't come until later."

"Like... after we've kissed a few times and we both know each other's secret weaknesses?" He asked, confused.

"I... sure."

"Okay. So after that, I ask you to marry me again?"

"Sodo, hon. Listen." You grabbed his face gently. "Marriage doesn't happen that quick. It takes at least a year of dating."

His eyes flickered with confusion but nodded. "Okay, well... I'll ask you to marry me after our first date then. Okay?"

"Sodo. You can marry me later. After about, hm, one hundred dates and a few years." You said firmly.

"Ohh, so first date, then we ask to be engaged." His tail wagged slightly, his smile widening. "Is that right?"

"Ah, no." You shook your head. "Sodo, marriage doesn't come that quickly unless you want people to think you got me pregnant."

Sodo tilted his head, one of his eyebrows cocking upwards as a devious smile hint at his lips. "Is that a challenge, then?" Your eyes widened and you gasped, lightly hitting his harm. "Is that a yes, my dear?" his smile widened, moving his tail to snake around your waist. "Sodo, I'm not having kids!" "But I want some," he pleaded, giving you puppy-dog eyes. "Please?"

"I don't think a half-ghoul child is a good thing," you shook your head.

"Why not? Don't you want a little me running around to call your own?" He leaned closer, gently touching your cheek with his finger. "Our baby," he whispered.

What was wrong with him? He was never like this. Your eyes widened as you realized-- he was nearing his heat cycle.

"Does someone have baby fever? Is it because your heat should be coming soon?"

He grunted, leaning in and sniffing your neck. "Soon enough..." You rolled your eyes. Great, now he was being clingy. You put your hands on his shoulders, gently pushing him back. "Alright, that's enough."

"But you look so tasty... please... you smell delicious." he whined.

"I'm gonna lock you in my closet for two weeks again if you don't behave." you warned, which did the trick as he shot back up and cuddled a pillow instead, letting out a small hiss.

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luneariaa · 2 years ago

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Found your Mike content and saw your ask box is open so....mike x reader one bed trope??

alright so i tried my best with this, and i hope this is still okay! 💜 kindly tell me if there's any writing errors.

. dividers by @/cafekitsune !! 🌻

Recently, you got kicked out from your own apartment due to financial issues and stuff; unable to pay the rent due time. Also with how the current job pays you, it makes perfect sense with how low the wage is.

Fast forward as to where you are right now, Michael understands your situation very well, so he lets you stay at his place for the time being. He has no problems with it at all.

But the thing is-- knowing how he's also struggling with himself and his own job income in general, he only has one bed. Aside from Abby's of course.

"Mike, that's okay! I can just sleep on the couch, you know." You already feel slightly guilty enough for staying over his place; lowering your voice a bit as Abby is already asleep around this hour. "You can use your bed."

"No, no."

"You are going to use my bed, and not the couch, okay?" He remains firm as he spoke those words. Considering he clearly knew about your current situation, he wouldn't even let you sleep on the couch. Mike would sacrifice his bed for the sake of you.

"Nope. You should be in bed." You didn't back down, pouting a bit at his insistence.

"Am I hearing a challenge now?" This time, a small smirk of amusement is plastered across his face, crossing his arms as he still stands by his own resolve.

"No, it's not even a debate."

You sighed tiredly, smiling a bit at him. "Mike, you can use your bed. I can just sleep on the couch."

".. I swear I have to pick you up and place you on the damn bed instead. So please.."

"Oh?" You raised a brow at his statement, "I would love to see you try-"

Mike cuts you off by suddenly lifting your form with ease; hoisting you onto his shoulders like a child, before putting you on his bed. Surprisingly strong even with his height.

"Okay that's--" You huff out as he finally puts you down on his bed. "--no fair."

"I warned you." He sighs, standing up straight once again. "I insist, just use my bed. I'll be fine on the couch."

"If that's the case-"

"Sleep with me tonight instead of the couch, please." It's a rather bold move, but you refuse to give up. If none of you allowed each other to sleep on the couch, then this is the only way.

He falls silent for a while there, before finally giving in, knowing that you refuse to give up anyway. Besides, you both knew each other for some time now-- what could go wrong?

"Alright, fine."

"Just-- don't try anything while I'm asleep." He dryly states, but there's also a hint of playfulness within his words as you send him a fake hurt look.

"Huh. Could say the same to you."

You huffed, rolling your eyes as you left some needed space for him, before lying down and facing the other way. He also did the same-- placing his arm over his eyes.

The lights were off and the room was silent soon after; the only sound left being the hum of the fan.

"Good night."

𝗔 𝗟𝗜𝗟 𝗕𝗢𝗡𝗨𝗦 𝗘𝗡𝗗 : -

Michael, completely deep in sleep like he never really was before, was cuddling you close from the back without even realizing it. The blanket covers up your chin comfortably; fitting onto his loose hold nicely.

He looks stress-free and more calmer like this. Guess he broke the rule first.

When you stirred awake for a bit, your eyes widened slightly in surprise, but didn't even make any attempt to move yourself away from his hold. It feels nice, actually.

Thus, with slow movements, you turn your body around and make sure that he's not awakened at all. You didn't know why you were doing it, but you gently brought your hand up to his face-- tracing his face with your fingertips before lowering it a bit to his jaw, before you hugged him to try going back to sleep.

You couldn't help yourself, especially when he looked very much at peace at that moment.

And as you start to drift away into your own peaceful slumber, the soft mutter from him in his sleep goes unnoticed by you.

".. love you.."

#fnaf #fnaf movie #five nights at freddy’s #mike schmidt #mike schmidt x reader #mike schmidt x y/n #mike schmidt x you #michael afton #fnaf x reader #fnaf x y/n #fnaf x you #aria's post 𖥔 ݁ ˖

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midnight-mourning · 6 months ago

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💘Midnight's DCA Valentine's💘

The people wanted it, I'm here to provide it, it's Valentine's request time! See below for more details :D

Requests

I will have 14 slots available for requests. Which, is much less than last time, but I don't have time to do a month full of requests, and Valetine's day is the 14th sooo, yeah. BUT, length will be the same as December, 1000-2000 words.

Requests can be anything (again)! Just ask that they relate to Valentine's in some way, be that directly or indirectly and of course DCA-related.

As most know I am an X reader writer, but as long as my general request rules are followed, I don't mind writing for ocs, canon, etc.

fair warning though for the above, I am not familar at all with TSAMS and if you DO have a specific au, I will do my BEST to be accurate but cannot guarentee beyond that

For those who don't know my rules, no nsfw (suggestive is fine!), and if you want something specific, be specific. Besides that, it's fair game, request what you want!

Potential Issues & Schedule

If there is overlap between request ideas, they will be combined in some manner of speaking (if possible). If needed, I will reach out to you about adjusting ideas or the likes, though I don't forsee this happening. This would occur if for example, someone wants gift shopping with Sun with their oc, and someone else wants the same thing with a reader-insert. Whoever requested second would be who I reach out to.

Requests will be posted starting on February 1st & ending on the 14th!

I will be starting writing as soon as I get the first request, and since I'm in classes again now, I need to prepare as much as I can ahead of time so to not worry about getting behind. SO, requests will be open from today (January 18th) until next week January 25th. I know it's a short timeslot, but I need time haha 😅

To keep things organized, please request in the comments of this post. This also helps to potentially keep from overlap in requests, as you'll be able to see what else has already been requested. If you request in my ask box or such it'll make things a bit more difficult, so please avoid that.

HOWEVER, there is one exception to the above, which is if you wish to request anonymously, which is completely fine to do! But please only request in my ask box if you want to be anonymous. If overlap happens in that case, then y'all may just get two responses with similar vibes on the same day (essentially a bonus lol)

Sharing & More

Please feel free to share this post around, and request if you want to! Once I hit 14 unique ones I'll reblog this post with the announcement that requests are closed, so make sure to double check they aren't closed already prior to requesting!

I'll also post updates every couple of days regarding the status of total requests as well ^_^

Everything related to this will be under the tag #MM dca Valentine's, just in case there's another similar tag out there and I'm not just taking it for myself

I'm going to try and upload these in real time to ao3 so if you prefer to read there that will now also be an option! As opposed to having to wait for edits and such

Bonus little thing, if there's any artists out there that would maybe like to make some doodles to go along with these... let me know 👀👀 I would love to do it myself (same for the december requests) but I am unfortunately too slow a cooker to manage it 😔 would just be for funsies (i do not have the money for commissions so this would be volunteer-based) and no pressure to make something overtly intensive or the likes! I've never done this kind of thing before but I would probably send you the finished request/prompt ahead of time and you would (ideally) have a week or so to make something. Again, very small simple little doodle and if something comes up there would be no pressure to finish or such ^^

General update things from me

Hoping to finish up Holiday Spirit in the next week or so! shooting for ch. 3 to post today or tomorrow ^^

DCA December is now completely edited/posted to ao3 (will be posting the last couple chapters over the next few days)

Have decided that i WILL be holding off on posting Confused Spirit chapters 36, 37, 38 and will be writing them all together to make sure the plot points go correctly/how i envisioned

Cooking up some fun things for @/divinit3a's Cafe prompts, so expect to see those throughout the rest of the month :)

Okay that's all for now, goodbye!

Tag list for the usuals :D

@scarletcowboy @beemyhuneybee @fishm0ther @deviouscrackers @elsajoyagent8 @luckyyyduckyyy @zenkaiankoku @jogimote @local-shrub @milosmantis @robinette-green @everlightreader @sinister-sincerely @starredeclipse @dangerva @juukai @crystalmagpie447 @mothgutz236 @lizyxml @divinit3a @amarynthian-chronicles @crystalfay

#fnaf dca #dca fandom #fnaf daycare attendant #fnaf sun #fnaf moon #moondrop #sundrop #dca fic #x reader #MM dca Valentine's #hoping this one will go smoother (for me) than december #i think opening requests a little sooner will help for sure #very excited to see what people request #hit me with your best shot folks #i can take it (probably)#also if anyone can think up a better name lmk i had no ideas 😔

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natequarter · 15 days ago

Note

could you please recommend me some fanfic works of stormlight archive?

im a big fan of kaladin and adolin (if that helps)

sure. firstly, though, i'd recommend you check out @cosmereplay's fic rec and stormlight fanfic tag, since i am not especially well-versed in stormlight archive fanfic (i am still reading the series!), as well as the fandom tag from the beginning, and i don't tend to read much about adolin specifically. as such, my recommendations are less aimed at any one character and more aimed at "stuff i enjoyed reading". without further ado:

Army Adolescence by Silvermoonwater: kaladin & oroden, local radiant discovers windrunner powers do not extend to being a single dad, feat. politicking and aroace kaladin

five times torol and ialai were sad teens (and one time they just started killing) by dally_nar: sadeas/ialai, trans man sadeas vs the horrors of vorin gender roles, murdering your way to the top is a viable political strategy

Doing It For Themselves by primeideal: evi/navani, that awkward moment when you fall for your sister-in-law, May Contain Women

The Blue Envelope with the Bronze Seal by cosmere_play: sigzil & hoid, aroallo sigzil, bureaucracy and soulmate aus regrettably do go together - much to sigzil's displeasure

Different Paths, Different Oaths by LucentRhythm: tien; helaran davar; elhokar; and elid-daughter-neturo, the basic premise being the way of kings if our main characters died (kaladin and dalinar are both dead here), and the story took a rather different path...

Safety Rope by Joey_Joe_Joe_Shabadoo: jasnah/hoid, a beautiful series of missing scenes exploring their mostly offscreen relationship, genuinely perfect

Kholin Fried Chicken™, also by Joey_Joe_Joe_Shabadoo: hoid & design, existential fast food, crack of the sort that is difficult to explain or warn for. may contain... uh... we don't know what it contains, actually. oh god. what have we done? do not read whilst drinking (you will choke); do not eat whilst thinking; do not question whilst awake. i the recommender cannot be held liable for any side effects of consuming kholin fried chicken.

Fighting Young Ladies by NevillesGran: adolin & renarin & jasnah, adolin is not sulking, the inevitable ableism of the alethi court vs Adolin's Fists

Phantom Pains by elsecaller_muu: adolin & renarin, general kholin family dynamics, the fallout of evi's death

A Thing That Should Not Be by BlindRadiant: szeth & nale, nonbinary szeth, here be vampires (guilty ones, of course, because it's szeth)

I'll Keep You Out of the Dark (If I Only Could) by YourLocalTiredTruthwatcher: jasnah & elhokar, their relationship over the years, and, ultimately, his death

House Meeting by Sailorspren: elhokar & moash & szeth, they're all vampires, best described as "what we do in the shadows meets szeth"

To Love Again by squirenonny: navani/dalinar... with a terrible, terrible twist

Reflection by thephilosophersapprentice: kaladin & laral, kaladin has changed a lot, radiants are somehow otherworldly

nearly the heavens by liesmyth: kaladin/laral, canon-divergent from before the way of kings, kaladin never joins amaram's army but ends up at the shattered plains anyway

Who You Are Behind Closed Doors by nevertheless_turtle: shallan/adolin & kaladin, ace kaladin, shallan and adolin both think kaladin is hot and he just Does Not Get It

and two fics of my own, whilst we're here and i'm not feeling shame:

Timekeeping, jasnah & shallan, left-handed jasnah, a sketchy exploration of what the hell happened to her as a child

The Masculine Arts, jasnah/hoid, gender feelings, hoid and the magic of stories

sidenote: as a rule i've gone against recommending multiple authors, in the interests of fairness and conciseness, but please assume any author i do recommend individually is also worth reading more broadly. have fun!

#asks #cosmere #stormlight archive

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kradeelav · 5 months ago

Note

I've been using a mix of Krita and Paint tool SAI. I'd appreciate resources for Krita specifically too. Thank you for answering by the way. ♥️

Of course!

So! Here's my guide to making comics with Krita, down to the details such as layer setup, borders, speech bubbles, and SFX.

preface: it took me at least a year to figure this process out; but once when you've figured out the system & a template, it's smooth sailing. let's use this finished spread from the selfship comic last year to go through the process:

i'm going to assume a certian level of digital program proficiency (knowing what layers are, having a general idea of what vector vs raster graphics are, etc) since otherwise this post would be a book lol.

(if the read more does not work: the static permanent link for the full tutorial is on my website here: https://kradeelav.com/diary/tegalog.cgi?postid=312&1740096282

rest of the post under the cut; this one's going to be a long one as is.

let's start with talking about the layers for a single page of the above comic image.

(ignore the "orbs" and "titania bubble" layers - those were oddities for this specific spread.) Going from the top downwards:

SFX - sound effects. this is an optional layer to have if you don't have a lot of sound effects. you can use either render the sound effects by drawing them out (raster) or vector SFX; whatever you're most comfortable with. more on that below.

frame - this is the comic page borders.

speech bubbles - self explanatory. contains both the text inside the bubble and the bubbles themselves.

ink - main lineart & drawing layer; self explanatory.

tone - the shading layer.

(deleted) ruff/sketch - this is the sketchy thumbnail layer that is imported when i first start working on each spread, and naturally gets deleted when the lineart starts looking good on its own.

so!

there's two types of digital rendering krita can do: raster (most similar to drawing with a pencil or tablet) and vector (computer draws mathematical lines and shapes and text that you can manipulate). a lot of programs fully specialize in one or the other but the killer feature of krita is it can do both on a single page; you just need separate layers depending on the rendering..

that's what this "fx" symbol stands for by the way - these are the vector layers....

... and the symbols circled in purple clue you in that they're raster layers (ink, tone, sketch) where you do the actual drawing. with me so far?

speaking of those:

borders/frame

here's what the borders layer looks like + (the print layout layer above everything in black/yellow). the print layout layer is really only useful if you're physically printing this comic (it's basically bleed/trim if you've heard of those terms, ignore this otherwise).

i really struggled with doing borders in krita until finding this tutorial:

youtube

- since the thing is i make a lot of last minute changes. i need to be able to move and edit borders around easily if a panel's not working for me. so the method above makes it incredibly flexible to just ... up and move one, or to make a gutter wider.

i also really need to be able to see what's behind the borders while i'm drawing it to check anatomy sometimes -- the beautiful thing is you can simply turn the layer style to "multiply" and it's effectively transparent with one click.

like this, voila!

lettering

here's the lettering layer(s) with one bubble's text selected.

fair warning: krita is absolute ass with the text tool. it's the biggest failing but in newer versions i do believe they're slowly working on improvements. thankfully this program can do just enough to letter bubbles.

essentially, i use the same trick as the frames shown in the video above. if you slap a "layer style > stroke" on the whole "bubbles" layer, that's where that 2px black border comes from, and that layer-style-as-a-border "follows" every bubble so it's consistent.

(rule of thumb aesthetics-wise is speech bubble borders should be slightly thinner than frame borders, and on average about as wide as your lineart.)

SFX (sound effects)

technically you can hand-ink all of your SFX if vector art scares you or if you don't intend on doing much, but the vast majority of pros use vector work for efficiency. hentai/erotic work also has a lot of SFX versus other (non-NSFW) genres for the immersion factor with bodily functions.

the spread above didn't need a lot, though.

as you can see it's mostly the inorganic orb clinks and then the big SHING. (i put my for-the-web-kradeelav.com signature on the same layer for laziness).

here's part of my current sfx library below just to show you what i start with for erotic strips; usually i start with some base fonts and start moving the letters around individually.

(a lot of these are redone for every project; there's some in here that are already "outdated" in my eyes.)

miscellaneous

my favorite inking brushes are from this free resource pack. my favorite halftone (shading) brushes are from this (also free). thanks for reading!

#not art #resource #krita #comics

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disco-elysium-via-polls · 11 months ago

Text

Today I'd like to show all the Thoughts that we encountered in the game, but didn't end up Internalizing. I think that the more you see of these, the more of a complete picture you get of Harry.

GUILLAUME LE MILLION

Temporary research bonus: -1 Logic: Head in the clouds

PROBLEM:

Whatever happened to Guillaume Le Million, who -- with his amber mane and sparkling teeth -- beguiled the tattered remains of the nation? While you suffered and suffered, did he dematerialize in a cloud of cocaine dust? Or did he simply stand in the corner and melt into the slendering *New* lines of some starlit boîte de nuit twenty years ago? Spare a thought for his great ass too! Or wait... maybe he became a police officer in Revachol West! Hmm...

Completion bonuses: +1 Pain Threshold: Blood oxygen is boring All PSY learning caps raised by one

SOLUTION:

Bad news: Guillaume le Million did not become a cop. In '38 he went on a tour to the Hsin-Yao province in Safre, where he died of auto-erotic asphyxiation. His body was found hanging from a decorative dragon tree in his junior suite, amid drug paraphernalia, unwholesome objects, and the Sylvia Trainor single "Wonderland" skipping in the background. And yes, you can take this as a metaphor for Revachol in the Thirties. And also as a warning.

DETECTIVE COSTEAU

Temporary research bonus: -2 Conceptualization: An idiotic idea

PROBLEM:

Detective Raphaël Ambrosius Costeau -- when you say it, it feels like you're taking a bite of lemon meringue while sitting on the terrace of a seaside cafe. On a cool summer day. In Sur-La-Clef. It's everything you're *not*. You haven't created many things during your stay in Martinaise, but you've created this. A fancy, sophisticated name that makes you sound intelligent. And that no one seems to *acknowledge*. Don't you feel like you deserve a reward for coming up with something so special? And what would that reward *be*?

Completion bonuses: +1 Savoir Faire: This one sounds fancy, let's have this +1 Esprit de Corps: Yup, fancy, let's have this one too

SOLUTION:

Monsieur Costeau, the reward for coming up with your classy new name has arrived. What are the attributes Detective Costeau should gain in? *Obviously* Savoir Faire and Esprit de Corps. You know *exactly* what they do and what those words mean. They're *refined*. Like *you*. You have a ton of that fancy stuff. And if the world can't accept Raphaël Ambrosius is your name -- you will always be Detective Costeau to yourself. R.A. Costeau -- sophisticated culture-detective. Specializes in ancient things and art.

BOIADEIRO

Temporary research bonus: -1 Physical Instrument: Astra Country

PROBLEM:

It has been brought to your attention that there are men who live by the law of the land and the strength of their arms. Sunburnt, rugged, smoking men who explored the great rivery veins of upper-Magritte and tamed the Mundi wilds. Frontiersmen, cow-herders, philosophers -- the *boiadeiros*... with a gun in one hand and an unfiltered cigarette between their lips, these men made their own rules. What would it take for you to become one too?

Completion bonuses: -1 Esprit de Corps: Lone wolf Cigarettes give +2 INT

SOLUTION:

Smoking, Harry. It will take a lot of tobacco-smoking for you to become a *boiadeiro*. Twin cigarettes fused to your lips and one hanging out of your nostril. In these tame, cultured times, without the sky’s dome above your head, the only way to be a true Franconigerian individualist is to smoke a lot of cigarettes. Light one up immediately. The smell of coffee brewing over a fire pit, a chestnut-flavoured morning. Welcome to Astra Country.

I'm not sure we ever actually encountered cigarettes in the course of our playthrough. Normally, they give +1 INT at the cost of 1 Health -- this improves the effect.

MAGNESIUM-BASED LIFEFORM

Temporary research bonus: -1 Shivers: No shakes

PROBLEM:

It is generally understood that human beings are carbon-based organisms, fusing little carbon tubes together to form complex, mushy structures capable of thought, love, and locomotion. It is also known that these structures sometimes like to “take the edge off” by consuming ethanol, amphetamine, etc. In such cases, it is important to supplement your body with magnesium. Tired? Mag it! Down? Mag time! Liver damage? MAXIMUM MAG! Some people say magnesium doesn’t really do anything and you just need to quit. What do we tell them?

Completion bonuses: +2 Volition: Magnesium receptacle glands -1 Logic: No such thing, man

SOLUTION:

We tell them: HELL NO. You’re about to become a magnesium-based lifeform. The age of the primitive carbon-man is done. No longer must mankind rely on slow-working background radiation to take us further into our genetic destiny. This is the era of guided evolution, and magnesium is the key. You are the first of your species. The next step in human evolution. An advanced magnesium proto-man who mags it up, drinks it down, and sniffs it sideways!

A pretty useful Thought if you have low PSY.

BRINGING OF THE LAW (LAW-JAW)

Temporary research bonus: -1 Rhetoric: Weird jaw

PROBLEM:

Hey, so a little observation. It's all cool, man. Don't freak out, but every time you say “I am the law“ -- and you say it *a lot*, it's basically *hello* for you -- your jaw does this *weird thing*. It sort of shifts sideways, hanging off your face at a jaunty angle, while the word *law* sounds oddly guttural and low. It's... strange. You wouldn't notice it, but after saying you're the law eighty thousand times, the question *does* come up: why *do* you have Law Jaw?

Completion bonuses: Learning cap for Hand/Eye Coordination raised to 6 Succeed all Hand/Eye Coordination passives -1 Rhetoric: Jaw still weird

SOLUTION:

Okay, so. We now know why you have *Law Jaw*. Why you say *the law* in a weird manner, and why your jaw does that thing. You had polio as a child. You hadn’t gotten vaccinated. It must've been right after the Revolution -- not a lot of vaccine going around then. So you got infantile paralysis due to polio and this jaw thing is a complication from that. Admittedly, it’s not very funny. But you *overcame* it! This little infant survived and became a sharpshooting supercop. So: fuck you, polio!

This is a pretty useful Thought *and* it tells us something, in my opinion, pretty important about Harry.

ANTI-OBJECT TASK FORCE

Temporary research bonus: -2 Pain Threshold: Hurts!

PROBLEM:

Take a look at your hands. See how bruised they are? See those little scars? This is Exhibit A. The material world is holding you back. Containers, mailboxes, doors, chairs -- they are all your enemies. Always have been. Atoms themselves are in on the conspiracy, forming shapes and structures that you hate. You are energy stuck in a body. You are spirit trapped in matter. Break free! Beat up that lamp post! Let it know just how much objects *suck*.

Completion bonuses: Attacking physical objects heals damage +1 Pain Threshold: Thick skin All FYS learning caps raised by one

SOLUTION:

Behold: the Anti-Object Task Force has assembled. God's avenging angel, arrayed against the lower emanations of the Darkened One: shoe racks, tape recorders, motor carriages. And doors. So many doors. You're not just pounding it all to pieces. You’re *reforging* the universe. From the anvil of the heavens to the worms below. Indulge in it. Be bold. Have an *impact* on the shape of Creation. Out of the furnace of your rage -- a new reality! Also, you should trash your room *again*.

The first bonus here is not as useful as it sounds, because by the time you unlock this Thought, you'll have already been through most of the attackable things in the game. The rest is still pretty good, though.

DATE OF BIRTH GENERATOR

Temporary research bonus: None

PROBLEM:

Your face looks like it’s 58 and your body feels like it’s 60. Your mind feels like it’s lived for one day or a hundred. Both longer than they ought to be, the day and the century.... But for how long, then, has this thing attached to your sentience walked the planet’s crust? Time to start racking those brains of yours, Elder One. When and where were you born?

Completion bonuses: Learning cap for Logic raised to 4 -1 difficulty to all Physique passives

SOLUTION:

You were born in the year ‘07, in the last year of the Commune of Revachol, right before it fell. In the Old Military Hospital, on the ground floor where people usually came to die, during a snowstorm. The Revolution had about one year left to go and the fires were still burning bright. There were explosions in the blizzard. This was 44 years ago. You are 44 years old. The bloating might never leave your face, but beneath it -- you still have some years. You still have some hope.

I believe you can talk about this with Kim once you have the answer.

ARNO VAN EYCK

Temporary research bonus: +1 Interfacing

PROBLEM:

The question won’t leave you – why did the melody line from a broken and discarded tape fit perfectly into a song played by some speedfreaks in a frozen tent? Can it be a coincidence? Maybe it’s the hand of the Man-Machine himself, in his attempt to craft a perfect song. Maybe Egg Head is actually Arno van Eyck in disguise!? Eyck? Egg? Hmm...

Completion bonuses: All white Motorics checks unlocked Reveals Arno Van Eyck gig posters in the world

SOLUTION:

Okay, so Egg Head is clearly not Van Eyck in disguise. Van Eyck is an Oranjese disc jockey -- but those people get around. Especially in Revachol, in the clubs on Boogie Street. Perhaps he stayed here for a short stint and discarded part of the song he was working on. Just threw it away. And then it ended up in the hawthorn tree. But why? Did he think it was *retrograde*? It wasn’t. Perhaps he caught a glimpse of the future and did not want for it to arrive just yet. Perhaps the city whispered the topline to him and he was frightened by it?

We've seen variations on this one before for other skill categories. The Arno Van Eyck posters give you additional orbs to click, which synergises nicely with Jamais Vu.

Egg Head also directly told us that his name was in reference to Van Eyck at one point, so that was not really much of a mystery.

SEARCHLIGHT DIVISION

Temporary research bonus: None

PROBLEM:

Missing persons cases just really get to you. It's hard watching people worry about their loved ones – the little nervous movements, the dark rings around their eyes from sleepless nights. And even if there are no loved ones waiting – you like to have all your ducks in a row, and it really bothers you when whole entire people aren't accounted for.

Completion bonus: +2 Perception: Clear-eyed pursuit of truth

SOLUTION:

You've sharpened your senses by being on the lookout for missing persons. Now you notice more of what's happening around you. Perhaps when you're done with this case, you can join the Searchlight Division of the RCM, and find every Revacholian that's ever gone missing without a trace (there is undoubtedly a backlog of such cases). Because you never know, a missing person could be just around the edge, barely out of sight.

ONE MORE DOOR

Temporary research bonus: +1 Half Light: What is behind it?

PROBLEM:

God dammit, it cannot be. A disgrace! That door on the coast... you remember the one, right? The one that leads to the abandoned supply depot? Why, in the name of all that's holy, does it not open? *Why*?! There *has* to be a way to get through that unopenable door. By gods, you're the police -- all doors are supposed to open before you. What will the others at the precinct think if you can't open a goddamn door? There must be a way.

Completion bonuses: -1 Half Light: No fear All PSY white checks unlocked

SOLUTION:

There is no way to open the supply depot door. Accept it. You cannot open *all the doors*. You have to integrate this into your character. Some doors will forever remain closed. Even if every single other door will open at one time or another, maybe to a key, or maybe to some sort of tool meant for opening doors... But this one will never accede to such commands. A realization crucial to personal growth. Crucial.

There will always be one more door.

HARDCORE AESTHETIC

Temporary research bonus: -2 Interfacing: Fuck grammar!

PROBLEM:

Not only have you internalized the Hard Core Aesthetic, you’ve also *contributed* to it. How harder-core could you possibly become? Low-core people come around you to correct your “typos”: it’s “Hardcore” here, “hard-core” there, “Hardorcore” in a third instant -- what’s going on? Those aren’t typos, man, that’s how core hardness works. If you don’t know “hard-core” from “Our Happy Hardcore,” what the fuck are we even talking about?

Completion bonuses: +1 Endurance: Really useful for doing drugs +1 Volition: Same thing, Hardman

SOLUTION:

Oh yes. Drugs. We’re talking about drugs. Let’s face it, these flirtations with the Hard Core Aesthetic have all been leading up to one question: Can I do drugs *harder* now that I’m a Hard Cop? And the answer is: yes. You can. You can do one more blast of pyrholidon and yellow shit-powder, you can even pull a ciggie and a lager on top of that. There. You’ve *truly* made the Hardcore your own thing now.

Despite what it says on the tin, this actually just gives you more health.

THE INSULINDIAN MIRACLE

Temporary research bonus: None

PROBLEM:

You were reminded of a poem, somewhere deep inside you, the translation of which you don't remember… "Nulla sarà cambiato della luce!” it begins. “Colori come grigio e marrone / Tutti stampati uno sull’altro / Trovai un vuoto / Una macchia Bianca / Gli altri guardarono / “Che bella giornata! Che bel tempo!” / Ma sentii la rotativa." You were reminded of it when you heard about the discovery of Insulinde. But what does it mean? And how do you know it by heart?

Completion bonuses: All white checks unlocked

SOLUTION:

It’s easy. You know the poem by heart because you were taught it at school. It is one of the Volta do Mar mantras repeated on the voyage that lead to the discovery of the Insulindian isola. And the words mean: “Nothing will be changed about the light! / Colours like grey and brown / All printed on top of each other / I found a blank white spot / All the others looked up: / ‘What a beautiful day! What beautiful weather!’ / But all I heard was the printing machine." What strange words to celebrate a new world.

You can only unlock this Thought when talking with Joyce after the confrontation with Ruby, making it a really useful tool if you have anything left to do in the game at that point.

And that's all the Thoughts that we encountered in our playthrough, aside from the ones we already saw in the game proper. We did also *technically* get to the point where we could have seen the Thoughts for the moralist and ultraliberal political alignments, even if we chose not to opt into them. So, I'll show those too:

KINGDOM OF CONSCIENCE

Temporary research bonus: -2 Half Light: Calm water

PROBLEM:

Heartache is powerful, but democracy is *subtle*. Incrementally, you begin to notice a change in the weather. When it snows, the flakes are softer when they stick to your worry-worn forehead. When it rains, the rain is warmer. Democracy is coming to the Administrative Region. The ideals of Dolorian humanism are reinstating themselves. How can they not? These are the ideals of the Coalition and the Moralist International. Those guys are signal blue. And they're not only good -- they're also powerful. What will it be like, once their nuanced plans have been realized?

Completion bonuses: Moralist dialogue heals 1 Morale Learning cap for Volition raised to 5 Learning cap for Logic raised to 5

SOLUTION:

The Kingdom of Conscience will be exactly as it is now. Moralists don't really *have* beliefs. Sometimes they stumble on one, like on a child's toy left on the carpet. The toy must be put away immediately. And the child reprimanded. Centrism isn't change -- not even incremental change. It is *control*. Over yourself and the world. Exercise it. Look up at the sky, at the dark shapes of Coalition airships hanging there. Ask yourself: is there something sinister in moralism? And then answer: no. God is in his heaven. Everything is normal on Earth.

INDIRECT MODES OF TAXATION

Temporary research bonus: -2 Empathy: Cold blooded

PROBLEM:

First, if you have a side-bitch ideology cooking somewhere, don't sweat it. Fightin' indirect taxation for the Gossamer State is compatible with *all* creeds. It's cool like that. You're a cool anarchist now. Unless you don't want to be an anarchist. Whatever! Stuff this meal ticket in your eye-socket and let's see if we can steal some *love* back from the robber barons at the customs agency and the *banditos* at The Insulindian Financial Oversight and Competition Committee.

Completion bonuses: -1 Empathy: Thinks he's a hustler or something Ultraliberal dialogue options give +1 real

SOLUTION:

Turns out those Financial Oversight Committee gangsters stuffed millions of hard-earned dividends away in the last place anyone thought to look: the hearts and minds of everyday Revacholians! You need to spread that deregulation gospel to the *people*. Tell them about that foreign fare tax. Preach that 98% gross burden. Preach it, preacher man! Set the brothas free. Taxes are racist.

Even with those, there are still *eighteen* Thoughts remaining in the game that we didn't encounter - either because we didn't have high enough stats, didn't pick the right dialogue options, or chose not to put any points into fascism. Some of them are mutually exclusive with Thoughts we did pick, some require *really complicated* methods to find. A few of them give us some more interesting backstory on Harry and Kim that's worth hearing -- but I'll let you uncover that on your own time.

#disco elysium

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thelittlevoiceinthebackofmyhead · 2 months ago

Text

Let's start with a bang: Neil Gaiman.

We all know what happened. In case you don't, just know that he's been accused by about 5 women (that I know of) of abuse in various different degrees.

Just so you know I don't think he's totally innocent... BUT there are a few things that just don't make sense and my head is driving me nuts. Probably I've read too many detective novels and my brain tries to solve things as if it is some kind of a game.

If you can handle some level-headed cold-facts-kinda-conversation (with all the needed trigger warnings that this case requires) you may proceed to read. If not, well... keep on scrolling, why bother?

To be fair the only testimony that tickles my brain the wrong way is Scarlett's. It both fits and doesn't fit his (alleged) MO. And I would like to tell you why without any of you thinking that I'm trying to discredit her testimony because "you support a rapist bla, bla, bla"

The first thing that got me in the Vulture article, if I'm not wrong... I have read too much about this... is that one of the other women said that Gaiman doesn't use lube. Either because he doesn't like it, he likes to feel the pain of his partner, he's allergic... whatever... she made it clear that he doesn't use it, and this was the one that "dated him" so there was a level of comfort between them (AKA it was an established and repeated pattern during their time together).

And then comes Scarlett and talks about the kitchen episode where (allegedly) Gaiman used a stick of butter as lube when she said that she wouldn't do it "like that" (sans lube). Why would he be accomodating to her? What does he care? According to Scarlett's own testimony, Gaiman saw her as a slave and used and abused her whenever and however he wanted. She has the strongest and crudest testimony yet... and this detail just doesn't fit. If he had (has?) such desdain for her... he would've just done it without butter anyway.

Another thing related to this that just jumped into my brain one day because that's they way it works is that during the aftermath of the MeToo movement the story of how during the filming of The Last Tango in Paris the actress Maria Schneider wasn't properly told about a rape scene involving butter broke out and was all over the media.

With this in the back of my head... there is a possibility, even if it is a slim one... that said episode with Gaiman either didn't happened like that or didn't happened at all.

If I had to play Devil's advocate: we all know that she had some level of mental issues, reason why Palmer "took her in" offering her friendship and unpaid work. After whatever happened with Gaiman, she said that she googled "Neil Gaiman MeToo" so the possibility of her stumbling with this news at some point, reading it and somehow including it in her testimony is quite high. If it was intentional or not is not my call to decide. But it is possible.

Another thing that got my attention was that both Scarlett and Caroline brought up Gaiman's son. Caroline says that he wanted her to give him a handjob while the kid was sleeping. Plausible, many men are gross like that.

Scarlett also brings up Gaiman's son and makes him witness of 2 obscene scenes. Most likely she told Palmer about it... so why wasn't it brought up on the divorce?

It is also said on Vulture that Gaiman "bleed her (Palmer) dry" on the trial for their divorce. We know that Scarlett told probably everything to Palmer... why hasn't she used that ammo to win their child's custody and divorce? No judge on this planet would leave a child live with someone like that. It is the kind of golden piece of info that any lawyer prays for specially in a case like this.

And yes you can say "hey, it's absolutely terrible to weaponize something like that" and yes, it is... but lawyers aren't nice people*, especially if they try to win. They will use something like that to drag him to the floor. (*it is a general rule, don't take it personal. Some lawyers are honest but it is a reality that one has to be very willing to cut some throats -not literally, I hope- and stab some backs to become a "sucessful lawyer")

One could argue that given that Palmer didn't backed up Scarlett's testimony, that could be the reason why she chose not to use such a vital piece of information on her own gain. And this raises the question of what kind of mother preffers her child to live with an alleged sex-offender than with her? Even if Palmer is a disaster, my guess is that she cares for her kid on her own way... the custody battle is happening. Even if Gaiman found a way to buy the judge or something, had she made this information public would've been enough to secure the custody (and if you allow me to be cynic: to secure Child Support as well).

I do know that those on toxic and abusive relationships do bow down their heads and let the abuser run scots free... but more often than not, the break happens when children are on the line. Gaiman could have all the power and might in the marriage but a propper momma-bear would burn the world down to the ground to get their children back.

I don't want to flat out say that she's a bad mother but it is rather curious that she chose to protect Gaiman instead of her child considering that, at this point if we believe Vulture, he ruined her life. If there was any kind of deal like "keep quiet and I'll give you X" she wouldn't admit that she's broke because of the divorce and living back with her parents (even if it wasn't her who said it to the press but someone who knows her). She's getting nothing out of her "loyalty" to him, not even the divorce (by the way why is it taking so long? isn't it of common agreement?). There is something fishy in there and most likely both have a lot to lose... but... once again... Gaiman already lost his reputation, his support system, his career and power (as limited as it is in the real world) he doesn't have anything else to lose... why isn't he coming foward if there's anything shady on that divorce? Why aren't they using this scandal as the perfect excuse to finish the marriage at once? Even as a PR stunt or something. It is... interesting.

As I said, I don't believe that he is completely innocent. He is, after all, a successful and powerful (in some circles, not as many as the fandom believes) man, of course he'll reap the fruits of it. In which world do you live to think otherwise? HOWEVER those women that spoke about it had some sort of relationship with him first either as fans or fan-adjacent, student, friends (?) that lived on the same state and it is clear that between their first encounter and the first move there was something (a talk, a friendship, companionship). But Scarlett is like "I went to the house, the kid wasn't there and he offered me to take a bath and then he joined me"... just like that? Just out of the blue he was like "hey, go take a bath in my back yard".

Considering that in the other cases he at the very least had a long talk before kissing a girl... Scarlett's scenario feels like a perv on a coat flashing girls on the park. It is very odd and really stupid (if real) on his part. He knows and was able to cover his tracks before... why changing methods now? Why with a stranger that just stepped foot on his house?

I find it hard to believe that the main reason he went to conventions or was in touch with his fans was to prey on young women as some sort of thirsty vampire. That... benefit... was a by-product of his work. He did liked to be worshipped, that's for certain. If that is what you want to believe, go ahead... the result is the same, all of those women had to trust him first because otherwise the "Neil is a creep. He came onto me like a hawk" was going to be all over the Internet and he didn't wanted that. So why would he be so crude all the sudden? It doesn't make sense.

If he is a voracious predator... that behaviour would've been present from the get-go and everything seems to point out the opposite: he would "choose" a girl and eventually get her close enough to try something (you could call it "grooming" but I don't think its quite there yet, but whatever). He got rejected a few times and called the day, as said by two of the women that came foward. That aspect that was present in the last, I don't know, 20-40 years wouldn't just disappear overnight. Is both his way of doing things and self-preservation instinct. Why throwing it all away? Was Palmer's alleged prohibition to touch her so provocative? Was Scarlett so irresistable? What the hell happened?

The sudden spike in violence and humilliation is also kinda weird. Granted, maybe there are other women under NDAs that could confirm his practices and how he moved from "basic" BDSM to something heavier but unless they feel like talking, we will never know.

The other women do bring up the Master-Servant kink, maybe some force display... but never to that level (the urine and fecal matter hasn't been brought up by anyone else, as far as I know). And... just look at the guy... does he look like he'd be strong enough or have enough stamina to make a woman pass out? I mean... if drugs were involved I could believe it but if there were drugs involved someone would've said it already (and it also would've helped Palmer's divorce). He's in his 60s! Fair enough that being 60 now is not the same that being 60 in the 1800s, but is being 60 doesn't equate being in your peak performance either. I don't know how many young men can make a woman faint during a brutal sex encounter but my guess is that not that many either (again, unless drugs are involved one way or another). Maybe Scarlett is just too frail? That's a possibility... the only one that could explain all this.

To close my doubts on Scarlett's testimony... the trial for 7 million doesn't make sense either. I could understand if that is the owed amount for all of her work + some compensation for the years that passed but I don't think that any kind of money can "repair" what was done to her.

I know, it is a personal opinion... the same one I had when I was little and all the Michael Jackson trials started to take shape. If I or my family were ever put in that place... we would be after blood and no amount of money would shut us up.

Granted, situations are different, needs are different too... but whenever any kind of sex allegation could be solved through money instead of jail time... alarms go off in my brain.

It could be that is the only way to "punish him" due to his status (I hardly think so, given that many celebrities got jail time even if it was for a brief period of time -compared with any of us mortals-), maybe is the only way she has to bring spotlight into this... we don't really know the mechanics at play here.

The trial (if there is any) could be dismissed due to the location. I read the motion presented by Gaiman's lawyers and I can't believe that Scarlett's lawyers said that USA was better than New Zeland because Scarlett is in Scotland now and flying back to NZ was about $200 more expensive than flying to USA. Gaiman's lawyers do have a point there, she could've done everything in England or even Scotland if she didn't trusted NZ's law system. The facts didn't happen in USA, it would take a lot of organization to summon the witnesses and prepare Zoom calls or receive videos with testimonies, not even the police department from USA has anything to do with it. Most likely USA will refuse to host it. Had it been the fan-turned-into-lover who did travelled with him around USA -I think- and has the whole UTI episode, the one that started the trial... USA would've stepped up. Alas, it wasn't her.

The NDA thing: I know that going after Caroline for breaking the NDA is, for a lot of you, an admission of guilt or an attempt to shut her up and yes, after all he did greenlit it to his lawyers (unless there's some kind of Representation through a Power of Attorney thing going on)... but again, it sounds A LOT to a lawyer's strategy "we'll go after her because she violated the small print we've put there definetly not on purpose in case this ever happened".

I say... we don't really know what does the NDA says in its totallity (I guess it is not just a single sheet of paper with "I promise not to speak about our sex life ever"). It is most likely about 15 or 20 pages with different things that can't be disclosed at all... and maybe the part she broke is for talking about his daily routine, the disposition of the house or even mentioning his son. We really don't know.

Now the reason why they are going after her could be revenge, could be to shut her up, could be kind of a reminder that she accepted it got the money and ignored it later (basically broke a contract). It'll be interesting to see if they (Gaiman and lawyers) are willing to disclose the NDA in order to prove how she broke it... and why aren't they going after Scarlett as well? She also mentioned signing an NDA and she made it clear that she got the money before signing it (unlike Caroline who got the money afterwards, and after a negotiation). That's curious as well... because they could go after both... why just Caroline? She's not the first one to come foward and definetly not the one starting the trial. Maybe because Scarlett has too much focus on her and it will feel like retaliation? Was this Gaiman's idea or his lawyers?

If you are still here, not fuming or asking for my head on a platter...

On and all... I know that this shocked many of you. I usually expect that people I like to have at least one fatal flaw. It's easier seeing it like that... everybody has a shitty side because we are all humans and by definition, we are not perfect.

I do believe that Gaiman took advantage of a lot of girls and women throughout his career. Has all of it been build under dubious consent? It depends on each one, if any of them ever felt "I can't tell him 'No' because he's my hero" then yes... if they willingly participated on it because it was him of all men and that made them feel special, then no.

He's probably very selfish when in a relationship and this can also depend on each partner and even the situation they were in at the time. People's feelings and perceptions change as years go by and there's nothing we can do about it.

Maybe he is a good-enough manipulator (no, I'm not looking at all fan interactions as him trying to sleep with anyone) that can convince women to do things they're not entirely OK with and this allowed him to keep on doing it for decades and that makes it all more difficult because... then everybody will blame both parties: on him for being like that, on them for trusting him.

I still struggle to call him "rapist" because the episodes told us just what happened not all the context needed to fully picture the situation (and as I said even if he manipulated those women into allowing him to do as he wanted, the dubious consent is a bitch that clouds everything because "she did say yes and that's what matters to the law") so it all boils down to he said/she said that will never get resolved unless one of the parties had recorded the encounter.

What about Scarlett? Well, as I said she is the odd one out and that makes me suspicious... had all of them described the same treatment from A to Z it would've been easier for me to believe it 100%. I do believe that something happened... but there is a chance that her story is 50-50 either because her memories are a little off or because she needed the story to blow up and there was only one way to do it.

There is no way we will ever get the full truth, only they know it.

There is no irrefutable proof on one side or the other to prove anyone's guilt or innocence (at least of what we know so far, is not like either will disclose it to the Media first instead of the Court, that'd be really stupid).

A part of the truth will come to the light eventually. It could take a few years or even his death for someone to give a full statement about anything. It always happens like that.

I'll keep on reading and seeing how everything moves foward with an open mind.

And just in case it needs to be said...

TERFS AREN'T FUCKING ALLOWED.

#neil gaiman #neil gaiman allegations #tw sa mention #tw rap3 #I really don't go much on it this is just rambling #I'm once again asking you not to pay to much attention to me #I ramble like this a lot

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