#also don’t really like anything Disney related anymore

[mpsansy]

I saw your previous ask and how about I recommend to you watching the "This Wish (Reprise)" video on YouTube so you can imagine it?

Mm- I’ll be honest. It’s too lame for me. Can’t see it

Edit: That came out really rude, I sincerely apologize for that. That’s not my intent at all here :(

[calxiyn]

Hey everyone! I’m not very active on Tumblr (but with how Twitter is going that may change). I just wanted to thank everyone who has posted about my videos here 🥺🥺🥺 I’ve seen a few posts talking about my content and sharing my takes and I really appreciate it. I do respond to all my YouTube comments but I may use Tumblr to try to answer people’s specific questions(?) or if y’all have anything you want to ask me about my videos / songwriting!

This Tumblr was also an account for my main channel (Calxiyn) so there’s a lot of RWBY / Gaming stuff reblogged here but like I said, I don’t really use Tumblr for that anymore anyway ^^ so hopefully it’s not too cluttered!

[oldiesstationlover11607]

🎶Good morning, good morning to you!🎶

Fun fact, I spent at least ten minutes looking for a greeting-related lyric from a band I saw in concert yesterday and could not find one that wasn’t extremely sad. Gives you an idea of my music tastes. So you get this one!

Anyways, hi! It’s 💛! Your favorite anon (jk). I absolutely loved the Disney story! I’m a Disney freak myself so I was sure I would know all the fun facts, but your story actually taught me one (never say fanfiction never teaches you anything). Also, your Daughter series has my soul in a death grip. I’m addicted to it.

So, I have a request. I absolutely loved the vampire story you did and the dynamic between vampire Josh, Tyler, and the reader. And I’m a sucker for a good angst. Soooooo…I was wondering if you could maybe do a fallow up where the reader’s hunger just cannot be solved (she’s just always hungry. I can’t think of a better way to describe it). So, out of necessity (and part curiosity), she one day follows Tyler on his hunt for a live blood source. But, one way or another, Josh finds out and he gets really mad (maybe just because he didn’t want her to kill or maybe he’s also a bit jealous too…your choice 😏).

I wanted to get this request in prior to the end of October which is why I made it now, but if you don’t see the vision of don’t want to do it that is totally fine. 💛

Real Thing Part 2 - Vampire!Tyler Joseph + Josh Dun X Reader

Warnings: Vampire stuff, blood, possessive tyler and caretaker josh (i love this dynamic so much hehe)

Word Count: 2066

A/N: Another vampire fic! God J love this AU so much hehe - enjoy :)

Part 1

The hunger had been gnawing at me for days. No matter how many blood packs I drank, no matter how much Josh reassured me that it would get easier, the ache never faded. It sat there, constant, coiled in the pit of my stomach like a snake ready to strike. And Tyler’s words echoed in my mind, his voice a low, teasing whisper that lingered long after he’d walked away.

You’ll realize you’re still hungry.

It was true. No matter how much I wanted to believe Josh—that this life didn’t have to be about killing, that we could survive without giving in to the darker urges—I couldn’t escape the truth.

I was starving.

I tried to distract myself. Josh and I went through our routine, checking the bags, rationing what we had left. He sat with me every night, his calm presence a comfort, his touch grounding me. But it wasn’t enough anymore. They felt thin, weak—barely a drop of relief for the storm brewing inside me. And every time Tyler’s words crept back in, the hunger sharpened, cutting deeper, “it’s a full-on rush.”

I couldn’t help but wonder if he was right. Maybe there was something more I needed, something only a living pulse could give me.

The thought terrified me. But it also thrilled me.

So, one night, when Josh had gone out to scout for more supplies, I found myself slipping away from our hideout, my heart pounding with a mix of fear and anticipation. I knew where Tyler would be. He didn’t exactly hide his hunting grounds—always close to the edge of the city, where the streets grew quieter, darker, and more dangerous.

My footsteps echoed faintly in the alley as I followed the trail of his scent. It was familiar, comforting in a way that only made me feel more conflicted. I told myself I was just watching, just curious, but deep down, I knew better. The hunger had driven me here. It was gnawing at me, clawing at the edges of my control, and no matter how much I tried to suppress it, it was winning.

I found Tyler in a shadowed alley, leaning casually against the brick wall, his gaze fixed on a couple walking down the narrow street. He hadn’t noticed me yet, his focus entirely on his prey, his body tense with anticipation. The way he watched them, his eyes gleaming in the dim light, sent a shiver through me.

I should’ve turned back. I should’ve left right then.

But I didn’t.

Instead, I stepped closer, my breath shallow, heart racing. Tyler’s head snapped toward me, and for a moment, his eyes widened in surprise. Then, that familiar smirk crept across his face.

“Look who finally showed up.” His voice was a low, teasing purr. “Couldn’t resist, huh?”

I swallowed hard, the hunger twisting inside me, making it difficult to think. “I’m just… watching.”

Tyler raised an eyebrow, pushing off the wall and stepping closer to me. His presence was intoxicating, overwhelming, like a magnet pulling me toward him. “Just watching?” he echoed, his voice dripping with amusement. “That’s not what it looks like.”

I opened my mouth to argue, but I couldn’t find the words. The truth was, I wasn’t sure why I was here. Part of me was curious—wondering if feeding from a living source would really be different, if it would finally quench the unrelenting thirst. But another part of me felt guilty, like I was betraying Josh and everything he’d been trying to teach me.

Tyler’s eyes flicked down to my throat, his grin widening as he stepped even closer, his breath brushing against my skin. “You’re hungry,” he murmured, his voice low and dangerous. “I can see it. You’re starving.”

My heart raced, my breath coming in shallow bursts as Tyler’s hand ghosted over my arm, his fingers trailing lightly along my skin. The hunger roared to life inside me, fierce and demanding, and for the first time, I didn’t push it down. I let it rise, let it take over, my body trembling with the intensity of it.

And Tyler could feel it. He leaned in closer, his lips brushing against my ear as he whispered, “Come with me.” 

The world around us seemed to fade as Tyler's words lingered in the air, beckoning me toward something I had fought against for so long. My pulse quickened, my breath shaky. I wanted to say no, to turn and run back to the safety Josh had built for me. But the hunger was too loud now, a living thing clawing at me from the inside, and Tyler’s presence only made it worse—made it unbearable.

Without thinking, I nodded.

Tyler’s smile widened, his grip on my arm tightening just slightly as he led me deeper into the alley, farther from the soft glow of streetlights and closer to the shadows. My heart pounded in my chest, not out of fear, but anticipation. My body ached with need, my senses sharpening as the scent of fresh blood reached me, faint but enough to send another wave of hunger crashing through me.

We stopped at the mouth of a smaller alley, where a lone figure stood, unaware of the danger lurking nearby. It was a young man, distracted, scrolling on his phone, completely oblivious to the two predators watching him from the shadows.

Tyler's eyes glinted in the darkness as he glanced back at me, his voice low and smooth. “This is for you,” he said, his tone dripping with temptation. “I’ll show you how it’s done. You don’t have to be afraid.”

But I was. Not of the act itself, but of how much I wanted it. The thought of sinking my teeth into warm flesh, of feeling that rush of blood as it flowed into me, was exhilarating in a way I hadn’t expected. The part of me that still clung to Josh’s teachings screamed at me to stop, to turn back before I crossed a line I could never uncross.

But the hunger drowned out that voice. It took over completely, twisting my moral compass into something unrecognizable.

Tyler’s movements were swift and fluid as he approached the man, too fast for him to react. In a blur of motion, Tyler grabbed him, pulling him into the shadows, his fangs flashing before sinking into the man’s neck. The sound of blood rushing filled the air, thick and intoxicating, and I found myself stepping closer, mesmerized by the sight of Tyler feeding.

My mouth watered, my fangs aching as I watched. Tyler’s eyes flicked to me, dark with hunger, and he pulled back just enough to let the man slump against the wall, still alive but dazed, his pulse weak.

“Come closer,” he spoke, blood dripping down from each side of his mouth. As I stepped forward, the man's pulse was a hypnotic rhythm beneath his skin, drawing me closer. Tyler watched me, his eyes gleaming with satisfaction, daring me to give in. My hand hovered near the man’s shoulder, fingers trembling, but it wasn’t the cold that made me hesitate—it was the weight of what I was about to do.

Before I could make the final move, Tyler’s hand shot out, gripping my wrist with surprising gentleness. His gaze never left mine as he pulled me toward him, his lips still wet with blood, the metallic scent wrapping around me.

“Wait,” he whispered, his voice low and seductive. Before I could respond, he leaned in, catching my mouth with his in a fierce, sudden kiss.

My first instinct was to pull away, but then the taste of blood filled my mouth. Warm, fresh, intoxicating. He had parted his lips just enough to let it pass from him to me, shotgunning the crimson liquid into my mouth. My body reacted instantly, the hunger flaring to life as I swallowed, feeling the rush of warmth spread through me. The sensation was overwhelming—electric, raw, and primal in a way I hadn’t felt before.

Tyler’s hands tightened around my waist, pulling me closer as his lips moved against mine. He kissed me deeper, his body pressed firmly to mine, and I could feel the heat of the fresh blood coursing through both of us. It was dizzying. I tasted the rush of the man’s pulse, felt the strength of it as if it were my own, and for a moment, the hunger quieted.

When Tyler finally pulled back, his smirk returned, smug and knowing. His thumb grazed my lip, wiping away the stray drop of blood before licking it off his own finger. “There,” he purred. “How does that feel?”

I stared at him, still breathless, my mind swirling with the aftermath of what had just happened. My hunger was still there, lingering, but the taste of fresh blood—it had been different. Not like the bags. It was immediate, potent, like nothing else I’d experienced since the night I turned.

Tyler tilted his head, his fangs visible under the dim streetlight. “Now you see why it’s so hard to resist. Why bagged blood isn’t what you should be feeding on.”

I swallowed hard, trying to steady myself. The pull of his words was undeniable, and for a moment, I understood the craving Tyler spoke of, that thrill of taking blood straight from the source. It wasn’t just the hunger—it was power, freedom. But as the heat faded from my lips, the guilt began to creep in, thick and heavy.

“I… I don’t know if I can do this,” I muttered, my voice shaky.

Tyler’s grin only widened, his eyes dark and full of mischief. “You already have,” he said, his voice teasing. “And it felt good, didn’t it?”

Before I could respond, a sharp voice cut through the tension like a knife.

“What the hell are you doing?”

I spun around, my heart freezing in my chest. Josh stood at the mouth of the alley, his face twisted in anger, eyes locked on Tyler—and then on me. His gaze flicked between us, catching on the blood smeared across my lips. For a moment, his expression faltered, and something darker flashed behind his eyes. Betrayal. Hurt. But then it was gone, replaced by fury.

“Josh, I—” I started, but he cut me off, stepping forward with deliberate, forceful steps.

“You’re feeding off people now?” His voice was low, dangerously calm, but I could feel the storm raging underneath. “With him?”

Tyler shrugged, unbothered by Josh’s presence, the smirk still firmly in place. “Relax, man. She didn’t even bite him. I was just giving her a little taste.”

“That’s not the point!” Josh snapped, his eyes narrowing, his fists clenching at his sides. “You know what happens if we go down this path. You know what it means.”

He wasn’t just mad. He was furious. Not just because I’d broken the rules—because I’d done it with Tyler, of all people. His jealousy simmered beneath the surface, mingling with his fear of losing me to this darker side.

“Josh, it was just… the hunger, it was too much.” I took a step toward him, but he backed away, his jaw clenched tight.

“I told you I’d help you,” he said, his voice trembling with barely restrained emotion. “You didn’t need to go to him for that.” His gaze flicked to Tyler, who was now lounging against the wall, watching the confrontation unfold with a mixture of amusement and indifference.

“Calm down, Josh,” Tyler drawled. “She’s just learning how to handle what she is. You can’t shelter her forever.”

“I’m not trying to shelter her!” Josh shot back, his voice rising. “I’m trying to stop her from becoming like you.”

The words hung in the air, sharp and final. Tyler’s smirk faltered for a second, but then he laughed, the sound low and dangerous. “Like me? You say that like it’s a bad thing.”

Josh took another step forward, his eyes blazing. “Watch it.”

The tension between them was electric, two forces clashing in the dark alley, both trying to pull me in opposite directions. And in the middle of it all, I stood frozen, the taste of blood still fresh on my lips, torn between the two of them. Tyler’s temptation, raw and wild, or Josh’s control, steady and safe.

But the hunger… the hunger wasn’t going away.

And I didn’t know how much longer I could fight it.

//

REQUESTS OPEN

[charlieswanismydad]

about me !!!

links

drawn by the amazing @ghosttoastx !!! if you read this ily you’re never getting rid of me now

Hi!!! I’m Alice.

I do stuff. It’s pretty cool.

Enfp, hufflepuff, Capricorn Sun, Libra moon, Pisces rising, he/she, and more!! I’m also a non-partnering aromantic and gray asexual!

I stalk blogs I like, don’t be alarmed if I like a bunch of posts at once!! In fact, be happy!! I love you!!!!!

If you want to talk to me please do!!! I want more friends. Just keep in mind I am a 15 year old minor!

You have been warned!

DNI:

racists, homophobes, sexists, etc. general dni criteria ig

people who just hate for no reason!! (anti-furry, just hating on certain fandoms, etc. ticks me off!)

proshippers

frans/fontcest

exclusionists

radqueers

radfems

pro paras. go to therapy

nsfw (also sorta related to above, pro cnc/ageplay. go to therapy)

WIPS:

Wilting Flowers - My actual baby. My pride and joy. It’s imperfect but that’s okay.

The actual grim reaper falls in love with a mortal. I can’t do it justice, you’re just gonna have to trust me.

don’t break my heart - Shameless Sans fanfic. All of the self indulgence ever, but it brings me joy :) semi discontinued, might come back!

I love it man. It makes me so happy. Basically yn is an awkward dumbass and so is Sans and they fall in love and stuff :)

Fandoms:

My main fandoms are Twilight and Undertale (obv), but I’m in a bunch more!! :D

The Arc of a Scythe by Neil Shusterman

Harry Potter by Daniel Radcliffe (JK…)

Steven Universe by Rebecca Sugar

Doki Doki Literature Club by Dan Salvato

Omori by Omocat

Arcane by Riot Games

The Walten Files by Martin Walls

The Amazing Digital Circus by Glitch Studios

The Phantom of the Opera by Andrew Lloyd Webber (the book’s by Gaston Leroux but i haven’t read it lol)

Deltarune by Toby Fox (is that an anagram???)

Meet the Robinsons by Disney

And more that aren’t off the top of my head!! Just ask bros :)

I’m kinda obsessed with UTMV, soooo….

Fav AU - Insomnia (link to chapter 1)

Fav Sans - Dust by Ask-Dusttale and Geno by LoverofPiggies

Music:

Ranked by popularity, with my fave songs from each! Just like the fandoms, it's all over the place.

Taylor Swift - Haunted

Hozier - In The Woods Somewhere

Muse - Soldier's Poen

Mitski - Last Words of a Shooting Star

Will Wood - Suburbia Overture/Vampire Culture/Whatever the hell the name is idek anymore

Dazey and the Scouts - Maggot

The Oozes - I Still Adore You

Lemon Demon - Action Movie Hero Boy

Tally Hall/Miracle Musical - Misery Fell

Teddy Hyde - Terry’s Taxidermy

Destroy Boys - Crybaby

The Crane Wives - Little Soldiers

Steam Powered Giraffe - Malfunction

Writing Requests:

HEY SO HERES A FUN FACT: I WANT YOU TO ASK ME TO WRITE THINGS FOR YOU!! LIKE I LOVE THAT!!! I WILL WRITE YOU LITTLE ONESHOTS IF ITS A FANDOM IM IN!!! OR I CAN WRITE ABOUT MY CHARACTERS IF YOU’RE INTO THAT!!! JUST PLEASR PLEASE PLEASE ASK ME AAAAAAA

Things You Might Want to Be Aware Of:

i tend to isolate myself when i’m having a Big Sad™️ moment. please do not be mad if i act cold!!!

i’m a very empathic person and i get really upset around negativity. please do not send me or mention me in anything political or controversial.

i get in my head about disturbing/sexual things. once again, don’t show me this stuff. don’t ask me to write about it, either!!

i am uncomfortable around religious discussions. i get enough of them irl!!! please keep them away from me :')

i’ve got adhd and possible ocd so yeah and also my auditory processing sucksssss so if we ever interact on call or *gasp* irl then i’ll say “what?” every five seconds

books. @bunny-on-a-bookshelf for books.

i’m just a silly little girl who is also a boy. we have fun here

Tags:

(new so they haven’t been used much)

#mootie patooties - mutuals

#irl alice - real life shtuff

#reblogs - self explanatory

#alice writes sometimes - my writing!!!!

#skeleposting - undertale/utmv

#is that an anagram??? - deltarune

#sparkly - twilight

#im aspec BUT - simping, fangirling, i do a lot of it

#liveblogging homestuck - reading homestuck and making vague comments about it.

#ALL HAIL - welcome to nightvale stuff!!!

#rock n robinson - meet the robinsons

#musical automatons - steam powered giraffe!!!! the best band ever btwwwew

Moots:

I literally love you guys 😭😭

@donotreleasemeintothewild

@livforlive

@last-herondale

@hiro-doodlez

@sneakyfox55

@junessillywachingcorner

@popiollie

@toka-san

@wishtale-blogs

@italic-does-random-shit

@ghostboisonly

@just-let-me-call-myself-arson

@pizzatowne

@ghosttoastx

@thenocturnenarrator

@lelitachay

@paraska00

@tundra116

@blurboppz

@flesh-archivist

@matzahstein

@paranoid-radio

@martinibass

@drrobotnic

@sandwich2451

@blaster-fagot

[writebackatya]

for the character ask can you do della for 1, 24 & 29?

What is this, the 3rd time someone asked me about Della? Well that’s fine with me! Let’s do this!

1. My first impression of them

So the first clip of Della I have ever seen was her singing her lullaby to the baby moon mite. Also I think this was the first clip of the show I actually watched. How did I come across it? Some YouTuber named Brentalfloss who I still follow on one of my Twitter accounts despite not watching his stuff in years

Anyway so Brentalfloss was someone I used to watch waaaaay back when Screwattack was a gaming-related website and not just Death Battle (nothing against Death Battle, I enjoy that show). He was one of those creators I learned about through the site along with some others such as the AVGN

So Brentalfloss’s whole schtick back in the day was adding lyrics to retro game songs that did not have lyrics, which includes the Moon theme from the DuckTales NES game (I actually still have some of his songs on my phone and occasionally listen to them)

When that episode aired he tweeted about and included a link to the clip which I watched. I thought it was so cool that a tv show on Disney would reference an old NES game (which I did own at the time and still do! I had retro games collecting phase) so I had to watch it. I remember despite not knowing anything about the show, it got me emotional. My reaction was something like, “I don’t know who exactly this character is but she seems really important and I bet this is a really emotional moment for the fans of this show”

So yeah, back in my day, this was MY Della’s Lullaby. (Warning this video was made back in 2009 when it was common to say the R-word for comedic effect on the internet. It sucks, but I don’t think the creator is that type of person anymore):

24. What do you think is a secret they have that they never told anyone?

I honestly don’t think Della has told a single member of her family that she had to cut off her leg herself.

29. How do you think they would be as a parent?

Screw the haters! Della’s a great parent! It took her time but she got there! And I’m happy for her

[aroaceleovaldez]

i’m not in this fandom like that so I didn’t know rick previously said he wasn’t going to write anymore. but is it you feel like he’s milking it? maybe it’s bc i’m more in anime/manga fandoms, but for example it’s common for mangaka to write light novels to accompany their story to add details to characters backgrounds or answer questions that aren’t in the manga, but I would never the concept of it bad writing or disrespectful….isn’t it just expanding the story? maybe I’m just not getting your point. i agree the audience shouldn’t be spoon fed, but nico still having nightmares & hearing voices & planning on going to tartarus seems too big of a plot point to be ignored. & chalice of the gods - that I agree with the spoon feeding, but it’s just simple fanservice, maybe rick missed writing those characters or maybe it’s money idk but I feel like a lot of the fandom looks forward to reading more about Percy, i dont think majority feel disrespected by it. (please also i’m not trying to berate you for not liking tsats and chalice im just curious!)

My problem isn’t that it feels like Rick is milking the series - though he absolutely is. He explicitly stated on his blog that Disney asked him to publish Chalice of the Gods as Percy promotion for the Disney+ show adaptation - but the fact that the way it’s being gone about feels cheap.

I get what you mean by comparing manga, but manga is ultimately a different media form. Manga and comics in general tend to lean more expositional by nature because that’s what’s required of the medium. This also means there’s a lot more room for those kinds of extra content series because the medium inherently provides space for them. That can also be a thing in novels as well - I was in Warrior Cats fandom. Warriors has tons of extra content books and novellas (and manga!). I read Animorphs, which also has lots of extra content books (and 52 books in the main series). I am very familiar with series that have a lot of books and bonus content and etc. But the thing with those extra content books is a.) it’s really easy for them to be bad in the exact same way i was mentioning, where details feel forcibly spoon-fed to you, and b.) they need to provide something new, otherwise they just feel like cheap additions that you’re better off skipping over, and if you do skip them you don’t loose anything. And this is 100% true for manga too! It’s a really common problem!

The point is these books don’t expand the story. We aren’t learning anything new that we wouldn’t be able to extrapolate anyways, and it is okay that we don’t know everything happening in the series. We don’t need to know the Exact Specifics of how Nico and Will got together, or how Percy did his college applications. And this has been true in the series before! We don’t know what happened on Clarisse’s quest in TTC. We don’t know what happened to Reyna and Hylla between Circe’s Island and Camp Jupiter, or even how they got to Circe’s Island in the first place. We still don’t know what happened in Albania. And all of that is fine. Nothing is lost as a result of us not knowing those answers. Heck, actually a great example - in TLO, Nico tells Percy he’s been exploring California looking for leads on his family. We’re told he has a new lead, and then he never brings it up again. We as the audience can presume this was relating to Hazel, but the important part is: We are never told what exactly Nico was doing. We know he was doing some very important personal stuff in California, and that’s it. Even if we presume it was relating to Hazel, there’s still huge gaps in that we don’t know about, like how Nico brought Hazel to Camp Jupiter, how Nico found out about Camp Jupiter in the first place, or how he discovered the Doors of Death were open at all. We know none of that. And that’s a good thing! Because we don’t need to! It’s completely irrelevant and adds nothing more to the story! We know everything we need to know about that and that’s it.

That’s how the end of TOA should have been. Yes, we get a cliffhanger that Nico has some personal destiny stuff, but we’re also explicitly not told the prophecy. That should have been the end of it, and it was SUPPOSED to be the end of it! We’re not gaining anything new by having Nico go to Tartarus again - we’ve seen a popular ship go to Tartarus already (Percy and Annabeth). We know what’s down there. We know what Nico experienced down there. We already know everything we need to know. There’s no point to this. Especially since there’s so many elements of the already established canon that emphasize that the alleged goal of their quest is pointless to begin with. We know what’s going to happen already. We can extrapolate. We don’t need a whole book or 3-book series to explain it to us - that’s the part that’s disrespectful to the audience. It’s saying that You Need To Be Told Exactly What Happens Because We Do Not Trust You To Be Able To Figure It Out On Your Own.

 You brought up a great word, actually - It feels like fan-service. And that’s a bad thing. Fan-service is not a good thing - it is almost always bad writing with no heart in it, just spoon-feeding the audience, and it’s disrespectful to the readers. TSATS just feels like solangelo fan-service by trying to make it Percabeth 2 and dancing Will and Nico around in front of the audience a bit more. We aren’t gaining anything new, and there’s no reason to bother with TSATS when you can get the exact same thing or more from fanworks. At best, TSATS could have maybe worked as a short story like Sword of Hades, or we could have gotten a Will short story like how The Stolen Chariot gave us more depth on Clarisse. But as it stands currently, it’s just cheap. It just feels like excuses for Rick to explicitly canonize random things because he doesn’t trust us to figure it out as being coded (this teeters dangerously on the JK Rowling approach), or shoehorn in myths he hasn’t used yet, which he was already doing in TOA and that turned out racist at worst and a mess at best.

There are absolutely extra content novellas I would love to see. Everybody’s been asking for a roman series for ages. A Reyna-POV 3 book Roman series would work perfectly and actually provide something for the collective series, because it’d actually give us some reasons to care about the Roman camp and maybe Jason’s backstory and further flesh him out as a character. I mentioned Clarisse’s quest from TTC earlier - do we lose anything by not knowing what happened on her quest? No. But she’s a major side character who’s been around since book one that we know very little about, and if we need more first-series content to promote the show adaptation, that feels like a great avenue, because we can use it to explore things that we don’t know much about! Like rogue demigods and the Titan Army (with Chris), the Ares cabin (quest members), or Clarisse herself and her backstory and fleshing her out more as a character and her relationships with other beloved first-series characters like Silena and Beckendorf. We can’t get that with Will because he only joined camp right before the Battle for Manhattan (and anything saying otherwise would be an outright retcon, which is even more annoying) and nearly his entire cabin immediately died. Everything we saw in TOA is basically all we’d be able to get from Will. And we already got it - we know where he’s from, when he came to camp, who his mom is, and his relationship with both his parents and his siblings and other campers. We saw who he as a character is in TOA. Yeah, it wasn’t much, but he’s only been around since TLO and barely existed in HoO - he’s a minor character, that’s expected. But all we’re gonna get is more of the same.

Tl;dr: My problem isn’t that it feels like beating a dead horse, my problem with TSATS and Chalice of the Gods is that they feel like cheap and pointless plot lines that are inherently insulting to the audience by refusing to allow any interpretation of the intentional free space left by the narrative and at best is a blatant shoehorning-in of more myths and canonizing random things that don’t add any actual merit to the story, they’re just there to be included.

[give-soup-please]

I had to write this in a Google Doc for fear of me doing something just to accidentally get rid of all of it, but anyways:

Hi, it’s me, May again. 

First thing’s first: I’m so sad that I missed the whole ‘submit stuff in the ask box for conversation’ thing - I’ve been so busy that I haven’t had time to do the things I normally do… But I suppose I could submit things whenever I want, huh? Eh, I don’t like bothering people (It’s a problem) so I usually wait to send things anyways. 

Anywhosies, first I must respond to your response to my response to your response to, er,…. and so on.

1. Don’t worry, I don’t plan on revealing myself just yet. Honestly, I think I’ll only do it when you ask, you might know who I am now but pfft it’s fine. I’ll be a secret as long as you wish me to be. Plus, being anonymous just adds that boost of confidence for me to say things that I may not say otherwise due to anxiety… haha, get it, may? AAnyways. I’m glad you think I’m intriguing… Honestly I would consider myself to be FAR far from that, but thank you nonetheless. I’ll be honest with you, I don’t proofread these AT ALL. Literally. I do skim over them just to make sure I’m coherent but … usually it’s just me slapping whatever words come to my mind onto a Google Doc and then transferring it over. I like this style of writing because it feels the most like me, like my brain, like my feelings. 

Also, no, you did not sound like a Disney Villain - I appreciate a good mystery as much as you do, I think, and I probably could have kept it even more of a secret if I had simply ignored Munchies or lied, but I would have felt awful doing either so I didn’t. Anyways, I’m glad you enjoy me being a strange mystery, here to grace your inbox with overly long messages on a sporadic basis. 

2. It’s honestly a tiny bit weird to me that people care so much about such trivial things. There are other things that I find to be so much more important than things like that, that I get a bit frustrated sometimes. I do have a habit of standing up for the things I personally believe in with a viciousness and intensity that would probably scare even the most staunch of opponents but that’s usually because it’s advocating for people to just live their lives happily so… I feel like they deserve a person like that in their corner. And why wouldn’t I stand up for the things I believe in so fiercely? 

3. I can’t remember when I last submitted this ask, but I’m sure you’re practically done or SO very close to being done with it. I know that, especially during things like that, it can be insanely hard to focus on taking care of yourself, especially if you have finals and such. But I think you will do, or have done a great job of it - you made it this far, haven’t you? I’m so glad that you have a support network of people for that type of stuff, not only do you deserve it but it’s just so much easier to do well for yourself when you know that, if you can’t, there’s others in place for you to help when you need it. 

Now that that is done, I wanted to mention all of the random stuff I slapped into my notes app:

4. I also do the cupcake thing! God I love it so much, it makes it so much easier to eat them (cleaner and stuff) and also like you said the distribution is much better. Cupcake sandwich for the win! I also, without fail, get comments on it every single time. Like, seriously, they act as if I reinvented the wheel…

Other food related things: 

- I love lemonheads! So much! I keep trying to find them at the store but they never have anything for them. Not even the small boxes anymore :( It makes me so sad because they also make really good “grounding” things for me sensory wise, like a shock to the system with something sour. Not sure if THAT made sense, but anyways. 

- I’m also picky about tootsie pops, but my favorites are the red and chocolate ones - I hate all of the other ones they just taste… bad to me. I can see why you wouldn’t like the chocolate ones though, especially if you’re picky about chocolate… they don’t really even taste like actual chocolate, kind of like watered down chocolate milk but different? 

- Side question: Have you ever had “homemade” hot cocoa?? Its SO good, genuinely, amazing…. Do you even like hot cocoa? 

- Are the rolls you like the sweet Hawaiian ones? Because GOD those are my favorite, I love them so much. 

5. Honestly I absolutely adore the ocean - I would want to spend my last moments there too. My favorite and best moments in life actually have taken place at the ocean - you know those moments that, while they’re happening everything feels so real and genuinely tangible, like you had never felt real before, but you do now? I’ve only had two of them and both were on the ocean… I am super sad that I’m moving away soon, I’ll be near a rather big lake, but not at all near the ocean. 

6. I love cats more than dogs for a variety of reasons - depending on the type of cat, of course, usually they are a lot less maintenance which is really important for me for health reasons. Dogs also typically have a lot more energy than cats (at least during the day) and I could never even hope to have the energy of a dog. And also cats just remind me of me, if I were an animal I would probably be a big ol skrungly black cat. 

7. While I know that the religion post is technically about Good Omens (Great taste, by the way) - I want to say that I absolutely understand that. I always get such strange feelings about it, even with media I like (i.e. Good Omens) along with those said undefinable emotions. Even if the experience was traumatic I feel like there are layers of beauty within it, of seeing people find hope where they previously thought there was none. Too much bigotry and discrimination in most religions for my taste (cough, why I’m Agnostic cough), so it gets tainted in a lot of emotions, but there’s always those lingering feelings there. 

You know the drill by now good sir, please eat, and treat yourself (especially today) Take care of you because I would ugly cry if you were gone (no, seriously, please)

~Your friend, May

howdy, may. no worries on not being around/available during that time period. we all have our own lives, and i never expect anyone to be available 24/7.

i appreciate that you're playing along and not revealing yourself just yet. makes things more fun.

2. i think you and i feel the same about this, and i'm a firm believer in free speech and all associated pleasures/risks that come with it. tumblr discourse is exhausting lmao...

3. my last day of school before summer break is june 15th. we are definitely in the home stretch now. i have one essay, one homework assignment, and one final left... just gotta stretch myself a bit longer.

4. the cupcake method i use is the only way to go tbh. try gas stations for lemonheads, that's the only place i've found them. you're right about tootsie pops and me being picky about chocolate flavors. i have had homemade hot cocoa, and it's one of my favorite winter drinks. i like both the sweet hawaiian rolls and the regular dinner kind. love is love, bread is bread./silly

5. yeah, the ocean is one of my favorite spots as well, and i've had that exact feeling you've described. i sympathise on the moving part, when i moved, it was to be further away from the ocean instead of closer. freaking sucked. but i found ways to cope. visit the lake, maybe. it's not the same, but water always helps.

6. if i was an animal, i'd probably be a crab or a seal.

7. yeah, i'm writing a good omens fic right now on the topic of religious trauma and the complicated emotions that result. it's been a blast to write, but as per my standard tradition, it's not going to start getting published until it's more than halfway done, which is how i run all my multi chapter stories. it involves very special things, like aziraphale being a queer guardian angel, and found family dynamics.

i'll take care of myself, i promise.

[wh4thefnk]

Lily clearly pulled a “nevermind hoe” with that married man tho 💀💀//

yeah i have to think that the novelty of dating him or just being around him might wear off quick depending on the person’s personality 💀 especially for someone already as famous and successful as lily james. he doesn’t really have anything that she can’t already get for herself so she doesn’t have to force herself to tolerate him for some benefits lmao

i’ve never been a marvel fan or in marvel circles so i remember my honest first impression of chris wasn’t stellar and i honestly couldn’t understand all the hype around him. yes he’s attractive but the way people talk you would think he’s literally the only attractive man ever to exist and there’s no man that surpasses or even matches his attractiveness it’s so wild. like it was genuinely very confusing to me???? i was like lowkey this man looks like a pencil what are you seeing please

but i was like this many people can’t be wrong right? and maybe i’m just being overly judgmental so i watched some of his interviews and i thought this man is a little phony like his laughing where he clutches his left pec is a bit over the top and the way he would talk over people was a bit questionable at times but then i watched some of his more reflective stuff and i know he wasn’t saying anything hugely profound but i was like huh maybe there is another side to him and he genuinely has a desire to explore “deeper” topics and he’s not just a basic white bread overgrown disney kid with basic tastes 💀 mind you this was covid so like i had time lmao

so i started warming to him because i admired the thoughtfulness i thought i saw in him and i was like maybe his big ass laughing is genuine and he really is just that joyous and dorky and dumb in a jumbo way and maybe i just can’t relate because we’ve had different life experiences and i started to see him differently especially when i saw his interactions with scott and lisa i was like ohhhh that’s just how your family is valid plus when he was being so vocal about social justice issues i was like okay maybe you alright white man. i liked that he had such a sense of justice and connection to humanity and what was right and wrong that he felt compelled to speak even though he did not need to. ohhh you’re gonna make a whole ass political platform even though you’re not a politician because you’re just that passionate? wow okay respect 🫡

like obviously he still said and did some dumb white man things because he is a dumb white man in a world that allows dumb white men to remain dumb white men. like why are you as a white man speaking on kanye? shhhh 🤫 why are you saying a black family forgiving the murder of their loved one is the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen? like that’s gross fr i’m begging please shut up shut up shut up 🤐 why did you think participating in a white savior movie was a good idea? why was asp going to do a series in the middle east that you didn’t go through with bc twitter rightfully dragged your ass so bad????? why do you seem so pro military and pro police? 😭 why did you autograph a prop bomb that represents the killings of innocent people? but my ass really thought he was genuine and his heart was in the right place and he would grow in his activism as he was exposed to new ideas 🙄 i know I’M the dummy

i don’t even know what i’m saying atp lmao the peer pressure brainwashing worked i guess like i don’t think he’s satan but maybe he is very much just some obnoxious guy who laughs too loud and deep down i still don’t understand why the karolinas and captreginas in his fandom find him so remarkable and magical and even the general public too. people REALLY like him. is he truly truly objectively that goddamn fucking attractive? like is it actually that serious? is it literally just the steve rogersificaion of his public image? i don’t even know where i stand anymore i’m just here observing🧍‍♀️

SORRY for the novel 😭💀

(also curious to know your first impressions of chris? are you an og fan? 👀)

Don’t worry bestie, feel free to vent 😂

I had been into Chris for a while, I witnessed him dating Minka and everything; never got in the depths of the fandom tho, I guess lurking never piqued my interest. And through the years my attention to him has swayed on and off.

My impression of him is that I found him endearing and sounded like a genuinely nice guy (and maybe he is, specially in a social level) and honestly I enjoyed his movies; to this day I think that as an actor he had or has potential to be better. And of course he’s done things that at first glance can easily charmed the public into thinking he’s very unique; for example having a political platform and being outspoken about certain things; he’s the guy with the cute dog that he rescued; it might sound silly but I genuinely liked him dating age appropriate women, I did think that little fact set him apart and (the worst of all, now I understand how this isn’t necessarily a nice/kind pov) dating Jenny did wonders for his image somehow, I vividly remember talking to another fan about this, how non-superficial he was for dating her, that it showed he valued character and personality the most 🤩

Maybe the peer pressure worked on me too 😂 I don’t think he’s the devil or anything; I would say he’s just disappointing; and I see character flaws coming to the surface right now, stuff that do not necessarily align with how he was portrayed, plus learning and rethinking other things. I definitely do not see him the same way anymore. I mean at the end it’s his life and he doesn’t owe strangers anything; but I guess we are also in the court of public opinion.

[purpleinkisgood]

You ever think of burning your school down and with it all the people who hurt you over the last 6 years of your life? Now don’t get me wrong I know it’s wrong and you should not do it bc duh but seeing as like half of your grade is hating on you and doing everything they can to make you feel bad and the way they look at you like your some kind of disgusting insect that’s useless anyway and a waste of space. And it just hurts like you can’t be yourself at school where you spend most of your time well in my case and even outside you feel like there is always someone who’s watching every move you do. The worst is you do one thing wrong and the whole grade is badmouthing you again. The funny thing is that the wrong thing is something stupid as saying something right in class! Like dude just bc you know nothing doesn’t mean nobody does. What I also experienced most of my life is that your being freaking bullied for trying to help and being nice. For wearing Disney merch bc you like it. I don’t allow myself to be freaking me outside anymore. To wear whatever I like cause I’m scared that people laugh at me again. I should not be scared. NOBODY SHOULD BE FREAKING SCARED TO BE THEMSELVES! But here we are trying to fit in. Trying desperately to not be an outcast. But no matter what we do how hard we try we’ll always be the cringe one or freak. It’s so annoying and painful. And the teachers never do anything. When I was really bullied I talked to the teacher and after two years did they really do something. Sad right? You expect from them responsibility and not refusal. What a world we live in. It’s really sad how far we’ve sunken. So yeah that’s why I sometimes imagine me burning my school down with all the people who hurt me over the years still inside screaming while I stand outside watching. I do hope it never happens cause no one deserves this no matter what but the pain always stays. But please to all the people who can relate don’t give up hope. Try to live forward even with this pain and people in your life it’s going to better someday. You don’t have to see them forever and you can show them what you got by trying to do better than them. Pissing them off in harmless ways that let you stay victim. Don’t become the culprit bc than your not better then them and you what you wanna be.

I believe in you

Love you

PS: if you want someone to talk to I’m here even though I won’t reply immediately I’ll reply dw

I’ve been through my own share of shit that didn’t I write in here so don’t worry I’ll try to understand

[purplesurveys]

1576

Have you ever felt like you were dreaming even though you were awake? Uhhhhhhhhh I don’t think so.

When was the last time something just seemed too good to be true? I guess Thursday? We started our subscription on Disney+ then and I couldn’t believe how good the selection is. I literally ended up being 15 minutes late for work because I wanted to test just how complete it is hahaha and I was very surprised that every title I’d search for actually came up.

Do you believe eyes are like windows to the soul? Erm, no.

Has someone ever whistled at you while you were walking? I’ve been whistled at, smirked at, lunged at, whooped at, and honked at, all by men. 

Are you guilty of texting while driving? I used to do it a lot back in college lol but the pandemic not allowing me to drive regularly for two years really did a 180 on my driving habits. I hardly overtake, get consumed by road rage, or text while driving anymore; and the only time I touch my phone is if I have to check Waze.

Have you ever caused a lot of noise in a library? No, that is one of my biggest pet peeves so I’d never do it myself.

Do you complain a lot? I wouldn’t say so; I’m quite the passive type.

Have you ever been to a music festival? No. I’m never familiar with the artists who come play at our local ones, anyway. What was the last thing that completely took your breath away? This is gonna be BTS-related yet again lol but Hobi’s latest Instagram post where he took a mirror shot with a film camera. Shit made me stop work to squeal for the next 10 minutes.

Are you a competitive person? To a fault.

Have you ever been in a relay race? Only in party games lol.

What cereal tastes so good that you always eat more than 1 bowl? I don’t like cereal. It gets soggy and in the first place I can’t even take large amounts of milk without my stomach malfunctioning.

If your life was a movie, what would it be rated? Idk let’s go with an R? I’ve done things here and there.

Are you more of a talker or a listener? Listener. But sometimes it depends on the person too; I could be more of a talker around other crowds.

Have you ever called in at a radio station & dedicated a song to someone? Not a radio station but like in local school fairs where you can send in song requests, yeah.

Would you ever go to a protest or be involved in a protest? Yes, especially if it’s for a cause I’m very passionate about. I joined a handful of protests, too, back in college.

Have you ever tried to walk on a foot that fell asleep & then tripped? Omg yes, that is the worst. One time I landed straight on my knee in the harshest way possible and the poor spot bruised for a week.

When playing rock, paper, scissors which do you usually pick? Rock.

Have you ever tried to write a book? Not a book lol but one-shots...let’s not talk about those...

Don’t you hate it when people blow smoke in your face? I’ve never been blown smoke on on purpose.

Have you ever been hit by a chunk of hail? No; I’ve never even experienced hail. Do one word text messages annoy you? Feel like I’m well past the age to still be annoyed by things like this.

Do you have high standards? This is a very vague question because yeah, I can have high standards for certain things - especially if I’ve paid a generous sum for them. But like when it comes to food for example I can be perfectly content eating at a carinderia.

Have you ever had something to say but you couldn’t get the words out? Pretty sure this is something we all sometimes have to go through.

Have you ever changed your clothes while in a vehicle? Yeah. The worst and most embarrassing part is I was also the driver. I can tell you with all the confidence in the world that that is by far the stupidest thing I’ve ever done. Fucking changing while driving, can you believe it?

Did you ever have your brothers or sisters clothing handed down to you? I’m the eldest sibling so if anything it was my clothes which were handed down to my sister.

Do you have the same routine day by day? It is, but I’m quite satisfied with the setup. My brain can’t process change as quickly as other people.

Would you ever go on a walk to raise money for cancer research? Absolutely.

If you were treated unfairly at work, would you go on strike? I would look for other options.

If God were standing in front of you, what would you say or do? Look around to see if there are any cameras because in no universe is that going to happen ever.

Would you ever try any extreme sports? No.

Do you know how to snap your fingers? With my right hand, yeah. My left fingers can barely produce a snap. Do you plan your outfits for the next day or just randomly choose? I normally plan them the night before so I can just grab my clothes and go (and spend more time in bed in the mornings, lol). < Very accurate also to me haha.

Are you a bossy person? I’m not bossy, but my temper can flare up if things aren’t meeting my expectations. 

Do you control your attitude or does it control you? I’ve been trying to control it because I do want to make an effort to be less hot-headed.

Is it true that if you don’t love yourself, you can’t love another? There is some truth to that, yes. Would you ever give blood? What blood type are you? I wish there was a less terrifying way to donate lol, but with the way it’s being practiced right now I don’t think I could ever give blood.

Is there anything that you believe should be banned for any reason? Donald Trump.

Do you share a bed with anyone? No.

Do you ever try making your dream up before falling asleep? No.

Do you get angry easily? Can.

[microphone-invasion]

Chapter 6: New Villain, Newer Trouble

The Imitator: Let’s get this party started.

Narrator: Then the battle buddies appeared.

The Imitator: I’m just gonna help Keith out.

Keith: Master, are you sure? I’m completely fine! I can do this myself. I’ll call you when I need help, OK?

The Imitator: Ok.

Garcello: Battle Buddies, ATTACK!

Narrator: And then the Imitator and the Battle Buddies split into a fight.

Liam: NOPE! -runs off-

Narrator: When they were fighting, Hank was hit and went flying to a wall. 

Hank: OOF- I’m ok!

Narrator: The Imitator and his crew sat down and watched the fight.

The Imitator: Well, this is relaxing, I had to work it out for like 10 years straight, now I can relax for a bit.

Keith: Master, can I also relax? I need a break from battle.

The Imitator: Sure, I mean like, I can make clones of us, so we can relax even though it looks like we’re fighting. 

Keith: Can you do that now? My power can’t hold on anymore.

The Imitator: Sure, then we can save up then fight. 

Narrator: Then the Imitator spawned 50 clones of the Imitator and Keith so making in total, 100 clones.

Keith: -pulls out a bagel and eats it- Maybe we could go on vacation soon, master?

The Imitator: It’s about time for a vacation, and good timing too, cause we are going to Disney World.

Keith: What do you think of my outfit though? I made the cape extra long so it looks like I’m related to you.

The Imitator: It looks nice. Ok, time to go.

Narrator: Then the Imitator and Keith teleported to Disney World, while the clones were fighting the Battle Buddies.

Narrator (continued): After they teleported, the Battle Buddies were extremely tired. Annie ended up fainting.

Garcello: A-Annie…? Are you ok?

Tomongus: -sad Hamster noises-

Hank: I don’t think she’s okay.

Black Imposter: Well, that goes to one of our allies.

Garcello: 2, you mean? Chad died, remember?

Black Imposter: Oh yeah, I forgot.

Tomongus: Really?

Black Imposter: You can TALK?

Tomongus: Of course I can! I just hid it from you guys. I was afraid you’d get rid of me so, I made hamster noises each time I spoke.

Black Imposter: Ok, first of all, you hid this from us for 4 years?

Tomongus: I’m sorry! I didn’t wanna be blamed for anything I didn’t do.

Garcello: At least you told us the truth. It’s ok to hide something. I’ve hid something too.

But I never told you guys. So I mind as well tell you now: I actually have a girlfriend.

Black Imposter: NANI?!

Hank: Stop the cap.

Tricky: HUMAN BEING HAS THE GIRLFRIEND?

Black Imposter: Hey, Deimos are you even gonna have a reaction?

Deimos: What? I think it’s fine.

Black Imposter: Ok, that doesn’t matter, what matters is that we lost the only weapon of defeating the Imitator, Keith over there managed to beat him somehow but now he’s evil and we can’t even control our powers thanks to the Imitator.

Garcello: All I want is my son back…

Narrator: And then Garcello burst into tears. When he did, Annie woke up.

Black Imposter: Hey, it’s okay, we can get your son back but for now, we need some help and we don’t have anyone that can help us.

Tomongus: Maybe I could get a chance to revive Chad! He’s one of the strongest allies that we had. But before we got Chad, Keith was stronger than him. Do you guys believe that I can get Chad back?

Black Imposter: Are you sure you can do that?

Tomongus: I’m sure!

Black Imposter: Ok, but, how are we going to revive Chad?

Tomongus: Watch me.

Narrator: Then Tomongus revived Chad somehow.

Chad: H-Huh…? I’m… Alive? But how?

Garcello: Chad?

Black Imposter: Ask Tomongus, he revived you somehow, and I have no idea how he did that.

Tomongus: Long story. Long story short; I drank a potion that I thought was orange juice!

Black Imposter: That literally made no sense, but hey, I’m not complaining.

Tomongus: OK. I didn’t ask. I’m the funny guy here. Keith still is gone so I’m taking his “funny guy” place.

Black Imposter: We are literally in a losing place, you know what, I’m done, I’ll just go back and just enjoy a nice HOLIDAY!

Narrator: Before the Imposter knew it, Garcello was just thrown into the Black Imposter. Garcello looked really damaged since he was fighting.

Garcello: OOF- I’m sorry!

Black Imposter: Wait, where did you get all of these wounds?

Garcello: It’s… A long story. Especially since it’s been happening right now.

Black Imposter: We literally shared long stories, so this can’t be this long right?

Garcello: It’s right in front of your face. If you were looking.

Black Imposter: Ok then… -realization- …so there’s that guy again, so we are all screwed because we can’t even control our powers. 

Garcello: No, it’s ME that can’t take control of the TEAM! So it’s all MY fault…

Black Imposter: What? NO, you lead a team of people who barely know what is going on.

Deimos: GARC’? A LITTLE HELP HERE?

Garcello: Hold on, give me a sec!

Tricky: CLOWN CAN’T DEFEAT MIDGET VILLAIN-

Garcello: I got it!

Annie: -drinks a liquid- This’ll help me I guess.

Garcello: You can use one of my smoke bombs too!

Black Imposter: I wonder how the Imitator and Keith are doing in DisneyLand, probably just destroying that place.

Narrator: While they are battling we're gonna check with the villains. 

[riverofempathy]

I am sending you all the love!! 💜💜💜

It sucks that we can relate to each other about some of these things. It’s also kind of nice to not be alone, you know? My husband’s red flags have mostly been… smaller? than the ones you faced (I am so sorry for you and so glad you got out). But there have still been far too many of them, and I do wish I had trusted my gut to begin with. But I didn’t know how to do that then. I was deeply entrenched in a high-demand religion/cult that taught me to trust God and my leaders and my husband more than myself. So I did.

Both my husband and I left the church around 2020, but you know what I realized yesterday? He has never been able to support me with where I’m at spiritually, either! Back when the gospel was everything to me, he wasn’t into it the same way I was, so I had to let go of a lot of my expectations and goals, like daily/weekly scripture study, which I was taught was super important to do as a couple so that you didn’t “go astray.” He was really casual about following the rules and influenced me to start being casual, too, and swear a little, skip church sometimes so we could sleep in, and instead of only pursuing God-focused activities on Sunday, to watch Disney movies or play video games or all kinds of things I was never allowed to do growing up, but he said were okay. Oh but when I lost my testimony and I learned the dark truths about our church’s history and I wanted to leave? All of a sudden he was committed to the church and he didn’t want to hear anything bad about it! So I stopped talking about it. Then a month or so later, I checked in with him, and he had flipped a 180 and was like, “Yeah, I think I’m ready to leave.” Without really doing any of his own research or deconstruction or anything. Ever since then, when we’ve had big, hard discussions, he’ll fall back on “well, I’m having an identity crisis; I don’t know who I am anymore, and I don’t know what to beleive anymore.” Like… okay? Figure it out then?? Actually put in the work like everybody else??

But yeah… like… he has just never been a good fit for me. Not when I was intensely religious, nor when I was intensely not. And I am grateful that I am out of that cult, obviously, but I’m also sad for my younger self for never having a partner who valued the things that she valued. Even if I let those things go of my own accord later. There were so many spiritual practices that were important to me that he was unwilling to engage with, because they didn’t matter to him. The only time they mattered was when I didn’t want them anymore! Kinda weird, right?

And kinda similar to how the only time he really started to listen to me and see me was when I opened up about a potential end to our relationship. Too late, buddy.

I’m right there with you in wanting to travel the world. Maybe doing it alone isn’t ideal, but imagine the freedom! Just like in your current living situation and my upcoming living situation where I’ll have my own apartment for the first time ever, which I’ve been yearning for—having the freedom to just do what you want, go where you want, eat and buy and wear what you want because no one’s there to tell you otherwise… ugh that’s the dream. Definitely harder without a second income, though, I feel you on that one.

I might get a cat, too, somewhere down the line. Gotta take care of myself first. 😊

Is there anyone else out there who just... can NOT express their true selves around others?

I feel like I've spent so many years of my life developing a personality that's more "palatable" and "acceptable" to others. I cannot, for the life of me, share the vast majority of my interests. Nor the vast majority of my thoughts and opinions with others. The only time I can actually feel comfortable being myself is when I'm hiding while using a device.

Idk if this will ever change tbh. I've had it happen too many times where people would act interested in knowing what I like... only to turn around and shame and humiliate me over it. For YEARS. And those same people now tell me that I'm boring and have no interests. I mean... this straight-up happened in so many settings with so many different people. I get that I have unconventional tastes in things but... damn!

People are allowed to know that I am very open-minded when it comes to food. I can cope with hearing that people think some of the things I eat are "too spicy" because yeah, lots of people just seem to be sensitive to certain foods. And I think it's cool that I can enjoy these foods. However... the idea of sharing my favorite music can cause me to have a mental breakdown.

And unfortunately, I'm now finding that people assume I must not like them if I'm not open with them. That's not true! But I can see where the lack of trust is hurtful.

[uncpanda]

Back to the Navy Yard: part 4

AN: Good news is this is coming much easier to me now thanks to my betas who are allowing me to bounce ideas off of them!

Notes: Eli David and Jackie Vance are both alive, also the timeline between Ziva and Tony was sped up, because slow burn is only good for so long. 

Master List

You wake up early, it’s a side effect from having an eight year old at home. Ziva seems to be in the same position, and is up even earlier than you. You come out of the room to find her cleaning her gun. Callen is on the couch, passed out and snoring, and your dad is nowhere to be seen. 

Ziva doesn’t even have to look at you to know your question, “He is outside talking with the director. The next guard shift will be here soon to replace us. Your people I believe?” 

You nod, “If things haven’t changed it’ll be Rossi and Morgan.” 

“You are very close with your team, aren’t you?” 

Your lips twitch, “You have no idea. Doing what we do . . . we rely on each other, maybe a little too much?” 

Ziva smiles, “As if our team is not the same? Doing what we do requires a special person, finding someone who understands that is also important. I believe that is why rule twelve is broken so much.” 

You feel your phone buzz and pull it out to see a picture of Aaron, you answer immediately, “Hey. What’s up?” 

“Wanted to let you know that the security detail has been changed up: big time. Agent Pride, Director Vance, and Dave are coming your way. The rest of us are staying behind to follow a lead.” 

“A lead as in you got a tip, or a lead as in there’s another body?” 

“The latter.” 

You hesitate for just a second before asking, “It’s not good, is it?” 

“There’s a new name.”

 You take a deep breath, “Who?” 

“Ellen Wallace, but we can’t figure out how she’s related to your dad.” 

You debate telling him, you actually debate it, “I need to talk to my dad first, but she’s connected.” 

“Can you give me anything?” 

This is the job, this is how they’re going to solve the case. You tell that to yourself, as you step out of the cabin. Your dad is on the front porch, and he raises an eyebrow at you. You muffle the phone against your shoulder and say, “New crime scene, with the name Ellen Wallace. They want to know the connection.” You don’t know what you’re expecting, some sort of reaction, but there isn’t one, or maybe you just can’t read him anymore? 

“Give it to them.” 

You lift the phone back to your ear, “Ellen Wallace was engaged to my dad. She died in 9/11, and he broke off the engagement two months before she died. She was a Major in the marines, and worked at the Pentagon. Her father is a retired general, I believe.” 

Aaron is silent for a minute, “You knew her.” 

“Yeah. I knew Ellen . . . really well.” 

“I’m sorry sweetheart. I’ll call back in a little bit if we find anything, love you.” 

“I Love you too, by the way, I told my dad about you and Jack.”

There’s a second of silence before he asks, “So, I should be on alert for snipers?”

“Nope, just bad nicknames.”

There’s a small chuckle, “Let me know if I need to run. Love you.” 

You never get tired of hearing that, “Love you too.”  You never get tired of saying it either. 

Your dad is staring at you when you hang up, and you’re a little surprised when he says, “I’m really glad you can say those words . . . that you can let people get close. I was so worried you were going to turn out like me; a mess of divorces with a missing piece.” 

You lean against one of the porch posts, “My entire childhood. . . you never once hesitated to hug me, or kiss me, or play with me, or show me any type of affection. If I asked for a hug you gave it, if I asked you if you wanted a hug, you said yes. Rainy days were spent with you showing me how to work with wood in the basement, or cuddling on the couch and watching Disney movies. You focused so much of your love on me, because I was there before it happened. I’m a part of a past you wish was your future. 

“But when Mom and Kelly were killed, that loss . . .that pain stopped you from ever letting anyone else fully in again. Diane, Rebekah, Stephanie, Ellen, they were good women. They were kind. They were nothing like the evil stepmoms in the movies we watched. I loved each of them. 

“But you were so scared that moving on meant forgetting mom, or replacing her and Kelly that . . .” 

He finishes the sentence for you, “I screwed them up? Drove them away? I know. And they loved you, they were all good with you. Hell, Diane tried to get you in the divorce.”

You laugh, “I think that was more about making you suffer than anything else. She loved you fiercely.” 

There’s several moments of silence before he says, “How the hell did they find out about Ellen? Neither of us used social media, there were no camera phones regularly available . . .”

“But there was an engagement picture. Remember? She made sure to include me in it. It talked about family more than the two of you though. Maybe that issue was archived or digitized?” 

“Think you can find it?” 

“Maybe, but I know a technical genius who can do it faster.” 

Your father’s brow furrows, “McGee taught you everything he knows, you can go head to head with him . . . or at least six years ago. . .” 

“I wasn’t talking about McGee.” 

You scroll through your contacts, hit the call button, and put it on speaker, “Speak and the wizard shall hear your request.” 

“Hey Penny.” 

“Hey there kitten! How’s time with your dad going? Have you made up? Are you safe?” 

“We’re in the middle of nowhere and we’re working on it. He’s actually right beside me, and you’re on speaker.” 

“Well hello Agent Gibbs! It’s nice to finally meet you.”

“Nice to meet you too.” 

You hear Pen chuckle before she asks, “What can I do for my favorite father-daughter duo.” 

“You hear about the latest crime scene?” 

“Yep. Bunches of horrible photos, and the name, of course. I’ve found out a little bit about Major Wallace, but not much. She died before social media became a big thing, so there are no obvious connections between her and your dad. . . but you would know that because you knew her. . .I’m sorry sugar, I didn’t mean to be blase.” 

“All good. But dad and I were talking, we think the killer might have found out about her through an old engagement announcement. It ran in the local papers in January of 2000. I’m thinking the paper might have been digitized?” 

“Give me a few minutes to run my searches, and narrow things down, and I’ll hit you back. Meow Kitten.”  

Your dad stares at your phone, “You’re going to have to explain that nickname.” 

“In due time.” 

He just rolls his eyes, and wraps an arm around your shoulders. A second later he pulls you to him and presses a kiss to your temple. It’s so familiar it makes your heart ache, and you can’t help but lean into it. When he pulls back, the arm stays in place as he leads you back towards the door, “Let’s get something to eat.” 

Breakfast is a fairly low key affair. Ziva asks you questions about Jack and Aaron, and your dad listens. G. on the other hand refuses to eat and just pouts. You’ve been around enough tantrums in your life to know when someone is looking for attention. You ignore the big baby. 

You understand it on some level. You had spent a lot of time with G. as a kid. He’d taught you and your dad bits of Russian, and whenever your dad and Stephanie had gone out for the night in Moscow, G had been your babysitter. You had texted daily up until you had made your announcement. You’d expected some sort of support from him, but he’d been firmly on your father’s side of things. 

You’re in the middle of cleaning the dishes when the door opens, and a second later a boisterous voice asks, “Gibbs! Gibblet! You in here?” 

You take a deep breath, “Hey uncle Dwayne, Uncle Leon.” You smile, and bypass them to hug Dave when he comes in. It’s reassuring to have a small part of your normal here, “How’re you holding up kid?” 

“As well as can be expected.” 

He holds up a bag, “Gifts from Aaron. A few more pairs of clothes, your favorite sweets, and I’m sure some other stuff.” 

You take it and toss it into your room, “Thanks Dave.” 

“I also brought wine. I feel that wine helps with family reunions.”

You kiss his cheek, “Thank you.” 

Your dad’s eyes follow you as you walk the bottle to the kitchen, and your Uncle Dawyne asks,“You need alcohol to spend time with us?”

You scoff, “When I turned 21, you and dad took Laurel and me through most of Bourbon street. You got us hurricanes as our first official drink.” 

Your dad and Dwayne exchange looks, “What’s your point?” 

“Wine does nothing for me.” 

He grins, and looks around you at Dave, “I’ve known this little girl since she was seven years old. She and my daughter Laurel are like sisters, thick as thieves.” 

“Laurel was also the only one who stayed in contact when I joined the FBI.”

Dwayne clears his throat, “They’re both NCIS babies. Little bit and Gibbs would come down to New Orleans several times a year, and then Laurel and I would come up. We’d do fishing and hunting, and then when the girls got older we’d do spa days and beaches.” 

Dave nods, “The joys of parenthood, or so I’m told.” 

Leon leans against the counter, “No kids?” 

You laugh, “Dave has the same number of ex-wives as dad. But when they left they still seemed to like him.” 

Dave rolls his eyes, “Watch the claws kitten.” 

Ziva and Callen head out. Ziva with a hug, and Callen with a nod. Ziva promises to check on Aaron for you, and then they’re gone. You look around the room at the father figures in your life and your actual father. It’s going to be a long shift. 

[eerna]

You really didn't like encantó? :o may it be okay to ask why?

just curious to know why didnt you enjoy encanto? i thought some things were pretty sweet but the story line was meh ://

Yeah, I disliked it, and no one is more sad than me about it :(((

It's the same issue I've had with many of the 3D animated features they've put out, except cranked up to 10. Disney lost its mojo. They wrote Tangled in 2010 and decided never to write anything with a different flavor ever again. I can't stand how the "awkward quirky relatable teen girl" protagonists that lined up after it are all the same person in different fonts. Also, the stories turned way too simple for me to enjoy. They all require a ton of overlooking plot holes and writing issues and wonky pacing and while that's totally ok for kids' movies, it's not the level of writing I'd expect from Disney's kids' movies. The quippy dialogue isn't charming at all, you can have witty responses and comedic relief and make it work, but they just construct conversations around horribly unfunny concepts and it is painful for my poor poor ears. And the music!!! I can't believe this was written by the man behind one of my fav musicals!!!!!!!! It is so boring and the lyrics sound like they were constructed the night before recording. I like the concept, but it's like no one on the team gave half a shit about the movie except the art department, it was made so that Disney can have a Colombia-inspired movie. It's all super depressing, but at least I don’t have to feel guilty about wanting to watch Disney movies at the cinema anymore lol

[handsmotif]

The Queercoding of Pinky and the Brain

This originally was just me infodumping to my friends on discord, but I decided it might be interesting to some people on here, so I polished it up and made it an actual essay lmao

To start, we’re going to break this into 2 sections -- the relationship between the mice, and Pinky’s relationship with gender, because queercoding doesn’t just mean gay!

For a 90′s show, Pinky and the Brain (and its mother show, Animaniacs) was very progressive for its time! But there were still lots of things that they couldn’t slip by censors, and thus, that’s where we have to read between the lines. And that is something I wanted to clarify here before we dive in, the actual meaning of queercoding. It’s NOT the same as queerbaiting. Queerbaiting is when the people producing certain media purposefully dangle the possibility of queer representation to lure in audiences (most prominent examples are BBC Sherlock, Riverdale, and Supernatural I GUESS? who knows abt that last one anymore), but never follow through, purely for profit. Queercoding is when media producers WANT to write in queer representation, but can’t, usually because the censors won’t let them. So, they must resort to subtext. (example: the policemen from Gravity Falls) It could also be unintentional, simply assigning certain characteristics associated with the LGBT community to characters. (example: Bugs Bunny, many Disney villains) Either way, it heavily relies on the audience picking up subtext, but whether it’s malicious or not varies, depending on the media. Bugs Bunny is an example of positive accidental queercoding, while a lot of Disney villains are negative examples.

Now, to actually discuss the gay little mice! Pinky and the Brain, whether it be intentional or not (based off comments from Maurice LaMarche, Rob Paulsen, and Tom Ruegger, signs strongly point to intentional, but it’s never been explicitly confirmed), is an example of positive queercoding.

There are many moments that I could pick out to discuss here, but we’ll start with some VERY on the nose gay metaphors. 

Remember Romy? If you don’t, that’s their actual biological son! Romy came about due to a cloning accident, where their DNA got combined and spat him out. 

There’s SO many things I could say about Romy. Every appearance he makes has an overarching gay metaphor as the plot. His first appearance in the episode Brinky (yeah it’s literally titled their ship name), it deals with his dads (WHICH I ALSO WANT TO POINT OUT, he DOES call them both dad, and they do both call him their son) disapproving of the fact that he wants to leave home and not follow in their footsteps of taking over the world. Brain even goes as far as disowning him whenever he tells him, which is certainly something a lot of queer people can unfortunately relate to. Also seen a lot in this episode is Pinky and Brain arguing even more than a married couple than usual, which pushes Romy away even further. Later, when Romy eventually does leave, and Brain starts to regret chasing him away, he tries desperately to reach out to him, but Romy doesn’t want anything to do with him. They end up tracking him down to an apartment building, where Romy is now living with his human girlfriend. When questioned about their relationship, the girlfriend, named Bunny, goes off on a tangent about how people shouldn’t judge others based on labels or relationships (hello?), and that Brain needs to be more tolerant. Brain apologizes and Romy forgives him. Happy ending.

Romy’s only other appearance is in the comics. Essentially, the plot of this one is that Brain wants to become the president of the local high school’s PTA, but he needs Romy’s help to make it look like he has a normal home life. He also enlists the help of Billie, the obligatory Woman introduced to make sure Brain doesn’t look as gay as he actually is, that he has a crush on. She pretends to be his girlfriend, and Pinky pretends to be Romy’s uncle, while they make up the story that Romy’s actual mother was lost at sea. Because if the organization found out that Brain has a son with a MAN??? THINK of the controversy! Anyway, the plan works, and Brain actually manages to get elected as president. Throughout this though, Pinky gets WEIRDLY jealous that Brain keeps brushing him aside for Billie. To the point where during Brain’s inauguration, Pinky actually dresses up as the wife/mother lost at sea and storms into the room.

[ID: Comic panels of Pinky, Brain, and Romy on stage at the inauguration ceremony. Pinky busts into room wearing drag, saying, “Yoo hoo! I’m back from years lost at sea to be with my son and ungrateful husband! Narf!” He then hugs Romy, while glaring at Brain. He goes on to say, “I’ll stand by your side, even though you left me behind!” The people in the audience begin to question this, saying, “Oh great fuzzy bangs!”, “What’d she say?!”, “He deserted her to be with that other woman!”, “What kind of monster is he?!”. Brain then rips off Pinky’s wig and says, “This isn’t my wife! This isn’t even a woman! It’s my roommate, Pinky.” Pinky replies, “Well, yes... But Romy really is my son! Poit!” And Brain responds, “N-Nonsense! He’s my son!” More people in the audience angrily speak up, saying, “What’s that?”, “He lives with a guy who likes to dress up in women’s clothing and the both claim to be that kid’s father!”, “Grumble! Mutter!” /END ID]

Needless to say, this doesn’t end well for them. What we can conclude from this is that homophobia exists in the Pinky and the Brain universe, and our characters are directly affected by it.

Moving on, And-There-Was-Only-One-Bed is a pretty common occurrence with these two. Their cage is big, they have plenty of room for two beds, but? They choose to sleep together? Even in some times where this has been inconsistent and they DO have separate beds, they’re always RIGHT next to each other. (what if we put our minecraft beds together ❤😳)

I would like to mention the episode, You’ll Never Eat Food Pellets In This Town Again! This episode is interesting to say the least. Deals with a lot of the meta of the show. Anyway. In this episode, Brain has a nightmare that he’s in a loveless marriage with Billie. You know, the woman he’s supposed to have a crush on. In the end, he wakes up from the nightmare in the same bed as Pinky.

Speaking of female love interests, Pinky is seen having multiple relationships with characters of different species. Any time this is brought up by Brain, Pinky counters with Brain being too intolerant. An honorable mention with this is in Wakko’s Wish, when Pinky is with Pharfignewton, and Brain’s constant pestering about their relationship could be read as jealousy. Pinky needs a mousy date, after all!

Something else I would like to mention is in one episode (I forget what it’s called, I’ll try to look it up later and edit this), Brain is applying for a job. The employer asks Brain if he’s married, and Brain hesitates before saying he “has a roommate,” but that he’s occupied with his own things, which then cuts to a shot of Pinky applying lipstick.

Leading into part two of this essay, Pinky’s relationship with gender! Pinky has always been very gender nonconforming, and loves to wear dresses, do his makeup, and make himself look pretty. For the most part, this is played pretty straight, and not as a gag, like a lot of shows tend to do! It’s just a casual fact about him that he likes to present femininely sometimes.

This does play into their taking over the world plans pretty often, where Pinky wears drag, usually either to sneak into somewhere. Like in one of their earliest appearances on Animaniacs, Noah’s Lark, where they pose as a couple to board Noah’s, and I quote, “love boat.” After boarding, Noah says to himself, “Who am I to judge?” Okay. Yeah. Alright. Anyway.

I actually had less to say on this than I thought I did, but I wanted to make sure to emphasize that Pinky at the very least is coded as being Not Quite Cis, and that he’s played a key part in helping a lot of people watching the show figure out that they’re also Not Quite Cis. 

Wrapping this up because I’m hungry, but I want to throw in some more honorable mentions that I really do not see any type of cishet explanations for:

They literally go on a romantic date at a very fancy restaurant in Brain’s Night Off. This is played extremely casually, and the only remark from anyone that they receive is that they are “much smaller than the usual clients.”

Pinky, on at least one occasion, daydreams about him and Brain being a married couple, and wanting to be a housewife (the original malewife ❤)

There’s an issue in the comics where Pinky has a crush on another male mouse, and when Brain gets annoyed, Pinky reassures him that he thinks Brain is cute and quite the catch too

Brain attempting to kiss Pinky in the reboot??????

Brain actually did conquer the world once in the Halloween special, because Pinky made a deal with the devil for it, and thus Pinky got sent to hell! Brain actually went to hell and gave up the world to bring him back

Brain was extremely close to conquering the world once more in the Christmas special, but after reading what Pinky’s feelings for him were (nothing romantic, just Pinky basically just praising Brain for being so hardworking and an amazing mouse, and lamenting that he never gets anything for it), he gets so emotional that he sabotages himself and wishes everyone a Merry Christmas instead

TLDR; these mice are very queer and need therapy, and are probably the most heavily queercoded characters that I can think of in children’s media.

[not-wholly-unheroic]

For the questions!! 16, 17, 32, and 100 pls! :]

16. What’s the worst decision you’ve ever made? What’s the best decision you’ve ever made?

I think my post-redemption arc Hook would say the worst decision of his life was choosing to take lives—especially the lives of children—not in the heat of battle but in a torturous manner when he didn’t have to. We don’t see it on-screen (particularly in the Disney film), but I firmly believe Hook’s history with the Lost Boys was brutal. His violent past haunts him now, sickens him. He has nightmares about his victims and often wakes up screaming, drenched in sweat, and ends up either weeping or trying not to vomit.

As for the best decision he’s made…I think he’d say it was probably when he decided not to be like his own father anymore, choosing love over hate, gentleness over anger, and forgiveness over revenge. When he chose to let go of his grudge against Peter and learned to open himself up to actually caring about people and allowing himself to really FEEL things honestly without shame, it made a world of difference. He has friends now and a family—people he would fight and die for. He wouldn’t have any of that if he hadn’t finally chosen to let go of the past.

17. What’s the most interesting coincidence you’ve had happen to you (or to someone you know)?

My Hook is actually Peter’s half-brother. They share the same father. Peter’s mother, after losing her son and presuming him dead, takes in her husband’s illegitimate motherless son, James, and raises him as if he were her own. He is the young boy in the bed that Peter sees when he comes back to the window. Young James grows up in the shadow of his brother, never quite being good enough for their father and never quite being able to erase his stepmother’s pain. Neither one of them knows it until a loooong time after his redemption arc, but it’s interesting that the island seemed to try to bring them together long before they knew they were related. Eventually, though, it helps them to talk about their shared history and they FINALLY become a family again.

32. What’s a common thing you think shouldn’t exist?

Tea brewed in a microwave. Also sweet tea. As far as he’s concerned, tea is meant to be served hot and prepared the same way it was back in his day (late 1600s/early 1700s). Hook isn’t a fan of most modern technology, especially if it messes with his tea, which he’s rather particular about. He does like a good London Fog, though.

He also hates most modern music and has a hard time even acknowledging it as anything other than “noise.” It’s too loud and…flashy? He likes simple acoustic sounds better and often prefers instrumental pieces that don’t require words to convey deep feeling.

100. What do you want an answer to?

My version of (Disney’s) Hook never actually knew his birth mother, so he has a lot of questions about her. He doesn’t even know her name. She died when he was still too young to remember much about her. He often wonders what she was like, whether she loved him, what name she might have given him before he was “James,” and what life might have been like if she had raised him. Unfortunately, those are questions that will most likely never get answered.