#also also i feel like im writing more in captions but i think that's partially bc i've been posting more on instagram
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dogboyklug · 1 year ago
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UH-OH! a comic about being trans. by me. part one of probably three :]
i felt bad about being transmasc so i decided to just give up and write about it until i hopefully didnt. i feel a little better getting this all on digital paper but there's still. a lot to draw. so. oops
i'll be posting the next parts. whenever they're ready (which will hopefully be soon) and linking them all here, so whenever you want just check back with the base post and i'll prolly add some links and maybe clean things up. yay!
text transcript / partial ID under the cut!
transcript:
looking back, there were a few signs i might have been trans.
[a sequence of events showing little me flinching and going "ow" at being called his deadname, little me reading a book and going "haha im like a tomboy but i dont like sports or being active or anything im just. a boy. haha", and little me having an active breakdown, crying and holding his glasses, with partially obscured text in a dark cloud around him. the only text visible shows his thoughts, and shows he's worrying that he's sexist for mostly only liking and relating to boy characters.]
...some.
however.
there were also a few things i considered signs of me not being trans at all.
EXHIBIT A:
[a drawing of little me, looking at his 3ds. he's thinking "as long as i make sure that i always play as the 'main girl character' in these games i wont cry because im a girl because i wont be me as a girl i'll be Them. roleplaying. as them".]
no dysphoria.
[caps] EXHIBIT B: [end caps]
[a crude drawing of little me staring at nothing. he's thinking "i don't hate women. and i don't like being mean to other people."]
[caps] I WAS A FEMINIST. [end caps]
and not toxically masculine.
i knew about trans people, but i didn't know trans MEN existed.
[a drawing of little me, with the caption "clueless". he's staring slightly up, and saying "huh?!"]
my mom was nonbinary, with a few trans friends, but people [caps] WANTING??? TO BE MEN??? [end caps]
to be
gross,
disgusting,
hateful,
cruel,
oppressive,
men?
[the background slowly gets darker until it reaches the final word, and that word is a significantly bigger font than the rest of the words.]
for a while, primarily due to my lack of research
[drawing of little me, staring at his computer (which is labeled "deviantArt machine") and going 'huh'.]
i figured, if i WAS trans, I was probably a trans women.
but of course, that was silly
you can't be a trans woman if you're already afab.
and there's no other ways of being trans,
right?
[a crudely-drawn drawing of a deviantArt favorite's tab. none of the favorited pieces have any detail, though several are the same width and length as classic deviantArt stamps.]
hm.
hmmmmm...
[a crudely-drawn drawing of a representation of one of the favorited stamps. it's a massive, pink stamp with the text "SHE/HER!" in it in all caps and pink lettering. bottom text states it is a "she/her pronouns badge by ...", though the rest is cut off.]
HMMMM...
[a picture of a mouse hovering over the 'favorite/unfavorite' button. the star is filled in, indicating clicking it would unfavorite the piece.]
[two wordless panels, side-by-side, showing little me staring at his screen, hovering his cursor over the unfavorite button.]
[two more panels, showing that little me has unfavorited the she/her badge. the panel showing his face shows he is grinning wildly, his hair has poofed up in excitement, and his glasses are now blue-ish purple.]
OHO!!!!!!!!!!!!1
.................and that's
quite literally
how it happened.
before i knew how bad the entire site was, i would frequent dA. CONSTANTLY.
it was baby's very first "social media" webpt site.
[a drawing of a tiny, cartoonish kitten with a small turf of hair, staring at wonder up at a computer, one hand on the mousepad. it is labeled "dramatic reenactment of me making my d a account."]
i wasn't really SHELTERED as a kid, i just didnt know fuck for shit, and my baby anxiety made learning annoyingly hard.
so i turned to memes as a sort of wire mother as opposed to my real, cloth one.
jokes can be easier to understand than reality, sometimes.
(this isnt a good thing.)
so, i sort-of-came-out on deviantart, home of the wacky, wild and weird, where i learned he/him pronouns were an option, and a choice.
[a drawing of little me, with blue glasses, gazing up at the sky and smiling triumphantly.]
and some crazy trauma but that's for a different comic. if i make it.
[a drawing of little me being hit with a cartoonish star, which is meant to represent the trauma.]
sooo...
that's it, right?
[little me, with a cartoony bandage on his head, gently rubbing his wound.]
my mom was supportive & anyone who wasn't ...isn't in the picture now
that's the end
...right?.
end transcript.
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mistykaru · 4 years ago
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i may ship kevaaron a little bit because of reasons
(yes this is inspired by that one picture w the ladies, the gal pals)
on the subject of lifting aaron pls take this other doodle that i’ve been thinking about for over a year (based on a panel from oresama teacher lol)
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gummi-sharks · 4 years ago
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hozier birthday post!!! i know he doesnt have a tumblr so im going all out on this caption cause no one will see it. this is gonna sound terrible i cant write for the life of me, anyways! hoziers music is very special to me even though i have no idea what his lyrics mean half the time. theres actually not a single song of his i dont like which is pretty cool and the feelings in his music is just hmhgnfndfn i cant express the vibes in words, but yeah. music has been really important to me recently and im glad i finally listened to more than tmtc because i was missing out :) putting a readmore now so if u wanna hear my rambles (please click for better quality ;-;)
now time for me to talk about the art!? im bad at talking about things i like so have the bad stuff. i feel like the pose and composition overall are very stiff, like theres not a lot of movement in them (pun not intended) which i feel tends to happen in my art when i have to go thru like 5 steps of rendering. i also have next to no experience in composition/backgrounds so that just adds to the overall weirdness. and to that this is also the first time ive ever seriously drawn nature things! which im pretty happy with how it turned out but there are definitely some issues, the first time i finished this (yes i redid like half of this it took me 24 hours according to procreate) everything looked really flat and there was no depth, which i think i fixed a bit (of course u cant tell im not posting the bad one) also my values are way off when u look at this in grayscale and overall the colors are just very repetitive (partially because ive never painted foliage before) also theres not a lot of variation in the foliage, just grass and bushes. overall the background was just a struggle i had no idea what i was doing (i made a whole pinterest board of references for this) for hozier himself i feel like it did pretty good in terms of likeness (obviously its not perfect and i wasnt aiming for that) but i think hes recognizable. i also tweaked the face a bunch at the end which i’m glad i realized it looked weird. for the piece overall i think if you’ve ever listened to hozier you’ll understand the choice. anyways that sounded very negative put i promise i like it. i just think it’s kinda interesting to analyze? ur art, it’s fun to me. if u read this far thank you!!! hope u like my drawing :)
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mochuelovelli · 4 years ago
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GAAAAHHH OKAY
Let's talk about the Timephoon Episodes
This is such an old topic of discourse but after reading many fanfics, videos, and some posts on the subject I have found little divergent takes on the whole subject.
While commentators are of the mind that, for the most part, the punishment and execution of said punishment for Louie's actions were partially if not fully justified but how she went about it was wrong.
Some fanfic writers and some subsects of the fandom but they are much more critical and often in a more black and white interpretation. Which is valid for vent art. However, I find both these portrayals to be lacking in some nuance.
Specifically when it it comes to who's to blame for the next 3 episodes, and to me, its more than just Della (and Louie but there really isn't much discourse here).
Let's start with Timephoon:
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This pretty much solidifies their relationship throughout the episode[Also sorry for no captions]. Multiple times Della is shown to have a very laissez faire style of parenting as she primarily wants her kids to enjoy being kids and having fun. This is probably in part to her personality in general - which is probably what Beakley assumes here - however it is also her want to be loved by her children and even more critically, she doesn't ever want them to suffer like she did. Above all else, she wants them to be happy and feel confident in themselves. We see this in all the previous episode with her and her kids - From Dewey and reassuring him that he doesn't need to prove himself to her [notably in this episode she only shows concern when Dewey himself is in danger, she doesn't give a shit when he almost kills her] to Huey and helping him to have the most fun he possibly can, to even Webby and making sure that she also feels confident in herself regardless in how she goes about things.
Bringing up all these adventures does raise some pretty damning hypocrisy. Della encourage Dewey's reckless behavior in his episode. The lesson at the end wasn't, okay maybe we shouldn't be going on dangerous adventures, it was its okay to be afraid and you don't need to prove to me that you're great I already know you are. Huey's message was similar, albeit more low stakes. Webby's lesson wasn't even that she shouldn't be trying to take such risks to find adventure in the future, it was just a lesson in not being disappointed when things don't work the way you want.
So why wasn't Louie's adventure treated the same? Well... let's look at some more examples of Beakley V Della this episode before we answer that -
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This is right before the kids find Bubba, Beakley's reaction is what most people would consider to be parental as she is concerned for the safety of the kids running out in a hurricane. Again we see Della acting casual.
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Once Bubba is inside and Huey geeks out about him, Beakley actually smiles bc she knows that something like this means a lot to Huey [keep this in mind for l8r]. She only gets serious after Della says it's neat without much after thought so she gives the lesson of the episode - "Small problems become big problems later if not prevented early."
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Next we have Della's faux attempt at being strict with her kids. Letting the irresponsible thing happen as long as they are "safe". While also harkening back to her previous episodes where she also is shown to have this attitude that "the kids can do anything as long as they are safe with ME or Scrooge or another SAFE adult", it is also good to note SCROOGE'S expression here to her patting herself on the back for her parenting. Now he could just be confused as to why Della is taking this "lesson" as a win, but he could be noticing that she really doesn't know what she is doing but unlike Beakley doesn't make any attempts to correct this.
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Another scene that people often forget when reviewing this episode, just like with all her other kids she at first takes LOUIE'S side and decides they should just roll with the punches like always. Which honestly is sort if valid because that's kinda Scrooge's whole MO; though he also had others to there to keep him afloat but we all know someone like Scrooge, Della, and the kids hardly see that. I also want to hammer home that, just like with the other boys, she doesn't shy away from displaying that she loves them ALL. A few seconds later, it's subtle but she is shown smiling and patting Louie on the head because like the other kids she just wants him to feel supported. If I was to be critical, I would say this is possibly because she likes the IDEA of her boys more than them but I mean - this is pretty much everyone's attitude towards kids. It might be amplified bc of her trauma but it's not unusual. But even still I would argue that she mainly does love the boys for who they are as she is excited to get to know them.
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After Della figures that they are looking for a "master thief", Scrooge and Beakley immediately know it's one of the kids. Shocking her since she later states she is of the belief that her kids are too "good" to do something like this. I also want to bring attention, again, to Beakley smiling (ik im putting a lot of stock into expressions but animation tends to do stuff like this for a reason). She is smiling at whom she expects is Dewey for messing with time and space. Bc even if she planned to scold him, she knows it's just their normal. Scrooge seems to also be of the same mind. Later Beakley gives a really good line about "Even good kids can do dumb things. We got to make sure those dumb things don't turn into bad things like destroying all of existence!".
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Mrs. B exists stage right
All jokes aside, this must have been a nightmare for all of them but especially Della. She had just finally admitted that she was out of her depth and made another mistake in parenting. But now it seems like she lost her chance to rectify that. Because for all she knows, Mrs. B will never come back. This is import-ALLRIGHTWEGETIT
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Della is then shown explicitly worried about her family. Emotions, insecurities and fear obviously getting the best of her. We don't know exactly what she is thinking but we know she is terrified of the possibility of losing one of her kids. When she asks about Louie, she probably thinks he must have disappeared without her knowing. That she might have already failed more than she could know, because she wasn't there to protect him. She doesn't know - she is "Della Duck" and she doesn't know how to fix this. She didn't expect everything to go so horribly wrong, but that's her theme isn't it?
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She is both relieved and understandably PISSED when finding that Louie was responsible for almost destroying the fabric of reality (let me say this again, nearly destroying the fabric of reality). She goes scold both herself and her son about the danger he put them in. Later we see Della, the last one leave and seeing almost everyone she loves vanish. We don't know how long each of the characters who left were in the past but we can assume it was long enough to have to change clothes. Yeah this was probably more of a visual gag but like, the other past characters didn't change their outfits when they came to the present so - (also Launchpad was specific about knowing how the world ends so he had to be there enough for him to understand it). Side note someones gotta write fanfic of these characters time misadventures. I wonder if Dewey and Webby ran into Agent 22.
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[Last picture of the infamous scene, side note did anyone notice Launchpad NODDING his head when Della mentioned his time schemes could've cost them their future? He's the only one who knows what happened so maybe Louie's misadventure has more impact than we think-]
Anyways, yeah we know what was said here. But I think it's important to see the reaction the other adults (sorry LP, and Gryo i GUESS) have here BC this is basically why I made this post. What Della decided to do was unquestionably the wrong decision, at least her way of going about it and I will not absolve her of her many MANY mistakes. However, let's remember she wasn't alone in any of this. She was with other parental figures who KNOW more about her kids than she does.
After Louie leaves, why did they think it was good to encourage this course of action? Why did they think giving full parental control to a PTSD, trauma survivor who barely got back less than a month ago was a good idea? Sure it's one thing to not want to overstep your boundaries but are you telling me they wouldn't want to guide her in the right direction at least? We KNOW both Beakley AND Scrooge have their grievences towards Della's parenting strategy or lack there of. Beakley so far doing the most to try and put her in the right direction (which speaks volumes to the problems Scrooge has).
So why wouldn't they explain that, hey, maybe taking away the one thing your kid thinks he is good at ISNT a great idea? Why didn't either say anything about their two day vacation? Something that came up presumingly on a whim and might of prevented (although i doubt it) Louie from trying to steal w/ time? He might have considered pushing back time schemes at least 3 days later. While Mrs. Beakley might be less aware of Louie's insecurities and ambitions, Scrooge definitely isn't. He should have talked to her, and hey we don't see what happens before they leave so maybe MAYBE they did. But again, I doubt it. Seeing as how they all agreed with her at the end, I don't see them trying to meddle with her.
But they should've. They are both experienced guardians and they have nothing to say to her? Plus Donald (goddamn it i almost finished a post w/o him) have THEM responsibility to take care of the kids NOT Della. So they are obligated to help her. Really, the other option other than just well negligence would be not thinking this punishment was a big deal. I wish this aspect was also scrutinized just as much as Della and Louies role in this arc.
Beakley and Scrooge (more so Scrooge) are just as much to blame in what happens as Della if not MORE since they know of her situation in only a way that an experience adult can. There is no excuse for their negligence.
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hopeshoodie · 4 years ago
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weird question, but i saw your post about a break up with him, and say if mc and Bobby had broken up and she found out she was pregnant, would he use that as a way to get back in? Any hc/thoughts?👀❤️
Oh my god. Oh my god this is SO good. I love this idea so much anon your mindddddd. 
I feel like most of the LIs would get back together with MC if they broke up and she got pregnant- Gary believes in ‘traditional’ families and would insist they get married so the kid(s because you know he wants more than just one) would have a dad, Lucas and Rahim would try to be around as much as possible because they want the kid to have a healthy father figure but still wouldn’t be enthused about it, and Arjun would just be like ‘ok im dad now’. 
But oooohohoho if MC didn’t want to be with Bobby? 
They break up and all the nonsense I described in that post happens. It’s like three or four months later. Maybe MC has found a new boyfriend, maybe she hasn’t. But she finally posts a pregnancy announcement on social media. It’s not much, just a belly picture and a caption. She doesn’t say how many months along she is or when the baby is due, just that she’s really excited to be a mom.
People immediately start speculating that it’s Bobby’s, but she is very vigilant about deleting those comments and blocking people. She also doesn’t do any more vlog style collaborations or interviews, and generally withdraws a bit from social media. 
So of course Bobby knows about it and of course he’s fixated. Is it his? Is she farther along than she should be and she cheated on him? He shoots her a few messages about it, saying ‘idk what’s going on but if it’s mine i want to be involved’ but she never responds. He lowkey doesn’t think it’s his because he and MC were always protected. 
But when the baby comes and MC posts pictures? Bobby KNOWS it’s his because that baby looks just like his baby pictures. Here’s when he starts getting desperate, calling MC and texting her. 
This either goes one of two ways- MC either lets Bobby get in contact with her, or continues icing him out 
If MC lets him get in contact, he’d absolutely try to get back together with her. Say that she’s pretty firm that she doesn’t want to date him but does want him to be in the kid’s life. He’ll do everything in his power to make himself the ‘perfect husband’ for MC and their kid- he’ll but a house nearby, he’ll get his finances in order, he’ll read up on parenting. Part of it is that he genuinely wants to be a good dad, but part of it is also he wants MC to take him back. He’ll always do those little Bobby passive aggressive comments like ‘it’d be easier to drop her/him off if we lived together’ or ‘this would be easier if we were married’ and then play them off like jokes. I imagine he’d slowly wear MC down by being so perfect that she’d give in and start dating him again.
OR, if MC refuses to talk to him/let him be involved, I think he’d still need to be involved. Idk how UK child custody works, but if they were in the US I think Bobby would 100% take MC to court once he’d exhausted all his options. It breaks his heart to do it, but she’s iced him out completely and left him no choice, he’ll do it. He doesn’t want full custody, just visitation rights and an agreement in writing. It would be HELLA messy, with people online speculating about it and him refusing to give up, but for his part I think this is the better option. He’ll grow up a lot through the process and come out the other end a genuinely good dad with partial custody. 
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