#but also partially just because i REALLY like this au. its super self indulgent

[dreamsy990]

hi i wanted to draw my own au so have a snippet of scene i rewrote like 12 times and will likely rewrite again

[hhhecates]

Modern AU! Genshin College Boys HCs pt 2

# — pairings: kazuha x gn!reader

# — characters: gender neutral reader, kazuha

# — summary: second part of our college headcanons, this time featuring kazuha (and some more quick doodles of this pretty boy at the end).  Here you can read part 1 and part 3 if you’d like.^^

# — warnings: none I think, just fluff, teasing cause kazuha is a menace, playful arguing, this came out so long I’m so sorry

# — tags: hc format, whole lot of fluff, strangers to rivals to friends to lovers kinda dynamic, college au, canon divergence

# — notes: And here we are to the next part of this series! I hope you’ll enjoy this piece as much as I enjoyed writing it. Next up is probably xiao, though if you’d like to see someone else, feel free to tell me^^

- he's a theater major with a knack for play-writing. If you thought of him as a creative writing major, you'd be partially right. He actually was double majoring in both, but he dropped creative writing because he's way too picky and whimsical with his works. He hates having to mold his writing to fit assignments criteria, even more so since while he's a very dutiful student, he also only ever writes when inspiration strikes. Kazuha knows he can't force himself to, otherwise he will never be satisfied with the product, and he's known to be a perfectionist to a degree, so that simply won't do. So now he just sticks to theater; - fun fact, his major started out as an inside joke of sorts, Tomo would always point out that Kazuha was a super dramatic person, with his impromptu lines of poetry threw here and there and his smooth and calm behavior even in the most frantic circumstances; - it peaked one day, Tomo was so done with his shit, he just went "Archons Kazuha, since when you're so much of a comedian?" raising an annoyed eyebrow at him. Kazuha just looked at him, a concoction of amusement and challenge brewing in the red of his eyes "Since now." he shrugged, clicking a few more keys on the keyboard of his laptop before looking back at Tomo with a self-satisfied smile and turning off his computer; - now, Tomo has known Kazuha only for a few years, but he knows, he knows how Kazuha can be way too well. It didn't help that they were just discussing their options for college a few minutes before; - "Kazuha, what did you do?" but Kazuha didn't answer, he merely glanced back at him with sympathetic eyes, you don't need his voice to add ‘wouldn't you like to know?’ because his gaze speaks loud enough; - if you think that's how Kazuha chose to take up theater in college, you'd be very right. Did he ever regret it? Not one bit. Kazuha is not known for his impulsivity. That, he could never be. He'd rather call it,,, spontaneousness (is it even a word?). Which he quite often indulges, but Kazuha also reckons that those kind of decisions always turn out to be the best ones he's ever taken. So you could say that he is pretty confident of his choice in theater. Looking back now, he never regretted it either, and he's actually quite grateful to that little ‘argument’ he had with Tomo and how it led to his situation now; - not that he'd ever admit it either if he didn't like it, Kazuha is (unexpectedly) petty like that, and he'd probably see it through even if he didn't like it. Out of spite to Tomo who would be just waiting for a "I told you so" moment (since Kazuha is usually the one who chides him)? Yes. - Kazuha is also a literature minor. In particular Japanese and German literature; - it used to be Japanese and French literature, cause he really loves the language, Kazuha thinks it sounds so elegant and suave. But he came to really dislike how pompous and over the top its literature can be. Doesn't help that he wholeheartedly despises Parnassianism, all that ‘l'art pour l'art’ bullshit. Kazuha hates poetry and art generally speaking whose purpose is just to look pretty and show off. Don't even get him started on la Préciosité, because Kazuha could write a whole theater play mocking it just for the hell of it. He actually thought of doing it, thinks of it as his own little revamp of 'Les Préciouses Ridicules' of Molière, he loves the dude. (This is literally canon since when Beidou asked him to perform poetry for the crew he said “only if the mood takes me, of course. Poetry for poetry's sake tends to lack meaning." and since then, mind full of Kazuha getting huffy at the mere mention of Parnasse and Wilde and such); - he now switched to German literature. He didn't think he would have liked the language as much, but he actually finds it really charming. Also German poetry is right up his alley: blunt and straight to the point, but with burning, strong metaphors and oh so prettily crafted lines. He finds law and order that give him balance but also a pawing sense of freedom and desire of understanding woven in it, something he deeply enjoys and that never fails to leave him all giddy and craving for more; - Kazuha is the kind of person that dresses in this super sophisticated light academia aesthetic. Soft neutral colours, and sometimes just a dash of a dignified red hue that could make him stand out in a crowd of thousands. Brown polished shoes always shining, big over-sized blazers he probably got in some thrift store (dragging you along with him), pretty flowy blouses and fluffy scarves that cocoon him and make him look even softer. His long hair unfailingly swept in a casual but somehow still orderly ponytail; - people look at him and they know that he is the embodiment of a humanities/literature student, like come on, he looks like he's straight out of one of those novels he loves so much; - Kazuha is legitimately everyone's crush at university, and how could you blame them? No matter that he's quite the introvert, he would still offer a polite smile and a slight nod of his head in acknowledgement to everyone on campus. He's always so polite and eager to help, lending a hand to the old librarian to sort out all the books in the literature section and so graciously offering to close up for her on the days she needs to get home early to take care of her nephews. Kazuha who stops every time he sees someone struggling to carry a heavy pile of books or bags, immediately sweeps in and carries them in their stead, his effortless kindness always managing to make him late to his own appointments, but who could be mad at him and his sheepish smile? - you. That's who. You refuse to fall for his tricks. Well- let's back track a little, shall we? You don't have anything against Kazuha, no no, absolutely not. Nope. Aside from the fact that half of your friends have an annoyingly obvious crush on him and basically give him heart eyes every time he sits in three rows of vicinity to where you're sitting during lectures. You and Kazuha share your German Lit class, and again, while being quite the introvert, Kazuha never wastes an opportunity to swoop right in and make his opinions everyone's problem known whenever the professor asks if someone would like to add something. And of course, local pretty boy has always something to say; - and today is no different. You usually don't mind too much, you actually enjoy an output that's not only your professor's, helps you see things in a different perspective and more often than not you find yourself nodding along as a bunch of students discuss about a poem or give their different interpretation of a particular metaphor and jottle down some notes for yourself. But it can become really frustrating when the sheer stubbornness of one student can stall the entire lecture until they have it their way. And of course the student in question is Kazuha. You nearly pull your hair put of your scalp as Kazuha refutes yet again one of your poor fellow classmates trying to defend the purpose of ‘die neue Sprache’ of German Symbolism in this one poem you're trying, keyword, trying to analyse;

- you're not the kind of student that brazenly takes the word to rebuke someone else, sure you have your own opinions, stand firmly behind them and would never back down if questioned, but you never felt the need to put yourself under the spotlight, expose your ideas on a silver platter for another say 100 students to turn their heads and listen to you and you only. But you also have really been looking forward to German Symbolism, one of your favourite authors was in program today, but Kazuha is still picking apart at the poem on hand, explaining in the most polite and reverent way how stupid it was for the author to write a poem about a belt buckle and compare it to words and languages (if you know this one poem, know that I love you); - so when your professor heavens a sigh and asks if there's someone else who would like to intervene (and try to shake Kazuha's unyielding opinion), you stand up from your seat, eager to wipe the expectant smirk on his face, and you start your own apologia. Two can play this game; - you end up going back and fort for the rest of the lecture, both of you refusing to back down, to give in to the other. Kazuha's known to be like that, sweet words turning sly and biting whenever he argues, though he would hardly refer to it as such, it's fun to him. And you can tell, it's fun to him to cradle words close to him and also to pry and break them open, to find a contradiction, hesitation in your thoughts. But you don't give him the satisfaction to. Kazuha is a little of the teacher's pet as well. It's not even his fault really, he's just so good that professors can't help but adore him. It's hard to come on par with someone like him. Honestly though, you just want to get your damn lecture over with, and if that's going to entail having to shut Kazuha up, then you'll gladly oblige; - after awhile, that one poem you started with, and whose name you've long forgotten, isn't even a point in your discussion at all, it's just an excuse, you know, hell, everyone knows it, because both of you are ignited in sheer competitiveness. It's a matter of pride and misery, of tattered words and unspoken stubbornness, like the entire class is your stage, for you to take, for the other students to behold, be your audience in this weird and brash dance. Heads are turning from one side to the other bemusedly, probably the students at the far back are snickering and betting on who's going to win this. Even your professor looks beyond amused. But you don't see it, don't see anything of it, you only see Kazuha, still standing from his seat across the room, in the firsts rows; - the sound of the bell, telltale of the end of the lesson, is the only thing that manages to stop you and Kazuha right in your tracks. You hold your breath, see him do the same as you throw one last glance at him before sitting back down and starting to pack up your stuff; - your little stunt isn't forgotten quite easily, next week you see some students exchanging knowing glances as they look at you taking a seat in German lit class. You're starting to regret your actions. Even more so when the professor announces a group project and purposely, because you know she did it on purpose, pairs you and Kazuha together. You groan and bang your head on the desk, so much for keeping a low profile and just following your classes; - on the bright side, the poet you are assigned is your absolute favourite. On the other hand, he's also the greatest symbolist poet in German literature, so you're going to have a field trip with Kazuha and his apparent dislike for Symbolism; - so when lecture is over, you don't waste your time trying to talk it out with Kazuha, and you bolt straight for the library, convinced on getting the project done by yourself; - it's exactly in the library that you meet him, while trying to balance three different volumes about the author of your project while reaching out for for another book of french poetry (that one just out of your own whim) on the highest shelf; - "There you are." you shriek and almost let the book fall straight on your head if it weren't for Kazuha's sharp reflexes. He swipes right in, gently takes the volume in his own hands, though when he turns it around and inspects the title, his brows furrow in obvious distaste; - he tuts disapprovingly, and you swear you're this close to let the other books fall on his feet and leave him there; - "Just when I thought it couldn't get any worse." that does get your attention, you quickly snatch the book right back, cradle it protectively against your chest, so much that Kazuha almost apologizes at the sight of you looking so fondly at a mere collection of words and paper. You could very much stomp away and never talk to him ever again, ask your professor to pair you up with someone else for this stupid project, or just notify her that you'd like to do it on your own altogether. You don't owe Kazuha anything, you could leave him there and he'd probably take the hint and don't bother you again. You could. But you don't. It's too easy, something in the back of your mind says. So you unexpectedly grab his wrist, soon receiving a questioning look from Kazuha himself, your eyes are harsh and challenging, a hint of annoyance that makes Kazuha's skin tingle, but your grip on him instead is gentle and unsure, asking for consent, he subconsciously nods his head at you, and you proceed to dragging him along to one of the tables of the library where he spots your backpack occupying one of the seats; - you don't even give him time to ask questions, and you don't question his apparent dislike for French literature either, as soon as he's sitting down, you slam open the poetry book like you know its contents by heart and present him with a poem by Pierre de Ronsard; - "Mignonne, allons voir si la rose..." he mumbles out half distracted, you can tell even in a few words, his accent is much more fluid than you anticipated, he might not like French literature, but you can tell that he at least gave it a chance, and that makes you respect him a little more; - "How quaint." he chuckles, and he doesn't say it outright, but you know what he means ‘how banal’, "Are roses your favourite flower? Is that why you like this poem so much?" his sonorous voice mocks. Ode structure, octosyllabes (typical for French poetry in that period), four verses of sixteen lines each. Metaphor of beauty through roses. Kazuha wrinkles his nose in distaste. He's seen too much of this, and pristine structures and empty pretty words just aren't his thing; - "No." you say, he looks back at you, one inquisitive brow raised "I quite dislike roses too. But when I read this poem, it makes me wonder if maybe they are my favourite flower after all." that does get his attention, he discards the book in favor for you instead, you almost shy away under his gaze, but you will yourself not to crumble. You don't answer him, again (Kazuha doesn't know if frustration or anticipation that takes over him). Instead, you present him with a new poem, one from the author you were assigned to for your project, and from the crease of his brows he probably already knows it. You try to take no offence in the way he's looking at you favourite poem of all times. 'Ich fürchte mich vor der menschen Wort', 'I am afraid of human words', admittedly, one of the poems Kazuha despites the most, to be expected really, given his affinity towards words themselves. Though he'd never admit that he never bothered reading the thing, the title was enough to keep him away. You don't ask him to read it, you just point at one of the lines in the middle of the whole poem. Kazuha wants to say there's no point in taking few words out of their pretty scheme and try to make sense of them, but he doesn't have the time to think, doesn't have the time to rebut. "Start from here. 'Ihr Garten und Gut grenzt grade an Gott.' " you recite verbatim without even looking at the page. 'You put your own 'God' to stand between 'garden' and 'good' '. Kazuha shivers, and he doesn't know if it's the desperation of your voice when you recite poetry to him, or the poetry itself, he only knows that he's suddenly afraid of the answer; - the project goes surprisingly very well from then, you'd dare say you made Kazuha change his mind from his previous stance on Symbolism, but the thought alone sounds quite preposterous. Really? Kazuha?; - after handing the final project in, you heave a breath of relief, thinking of finally going back to before Kazuha; - but you quickly find that there's no 'before Kazuha' no more. That boy simply won't leave you alone; - Kazuha who slips cheeky poetry lines in your textbooks that make your eyes widen and your cheeks heat up while he brazenly smiles at you from across the hall (how the hell did he even get access to your stuff, to this day this is still beyond you); - he gets you hooked on Japanese literature too, shows you all his favourites, recites Hokushi's haikus to you, Experimenting I hung the moon on various branches of the Pine. And he looks at you, like you are the one who hung the moon for him. Whispers to you dan 69 of the Ise Monogatari like it's you and him who share a tale of forbidden love. If you stare for too long you might just think that he's true; - Kazuha who takes you by the hand, ignoring your half-hearted protests, drags you through narrow streets, shows you the best sights, best bakeries (where he insists on buying you the pastries you have, not so secretly, been eyeing), still holding your hand as he ushers you in his favourite vintage shops, chuckling at the way your mouth gapes at the sight of so many antiques, excitedly brings you to the book section just to see your eyes sparkle at the sight of old french poetry books. He tugs on your fingers "Let's play a game, I'll buy a book that reminds me of you. You buy a book that reminds you of me, then we’ll gift it to each other." and before you can say anything, he has already disappeared behind the many shelves; - Kazuha who invites you at his dorm more often than not, whines and complains if you try to come up with excuses. He's always so much softer in the privacy of his own room, hair more often than not let down from his signature ponytail, he bleats and grumbles about how his scalp hurts from all the tugging. You card your fingers through his hair to offer him some relief, and he quickly melts into your touch, leaning heavily in your hands before completely dropping down you lap and nuzzling into you. He reminds you of the white cat his roommate Tomo is so fond of. He closes his eyes and sighs contentedly, hums when you gently scrape at his nape, his own way of silently telling you not to stop, that still doesn't help how hot your cheeks feel, but he doesn't need to know that; - it's while brushing his hair and tracing your fingers along the many piercings adorning his ears (a couple of low helix, one standard lobe piercing per ear, one of which occasionally sports a fun dangly earring that suits him way too well) that you find the tattoo sitting gracefully at the back of his neck, it's a simple maple leaf in soft hues that remind you of watercolours for the way they blend with his skin, you can't help the strangled noise that escapes your throat; - "You have a tattoo?!" you're not even guilty of the accusatory tone of your voice. Kazuha clicks his tongue, probably displeased of the fact that your fingers stopped their work on his scalp. He looks at you, one inch away from sleep. He's all slurry and cute when he's sleepy (you'd know from the ungodly amount of times he asked you to 'sleep over because it has gotten too late for you to be out') but sleepy Kazuha also happens to lose all his filters and thus be even cheekier than usual (you don't even know how that's possible to begin with); - he chuckles, deeper than his usual tone, his gaze is nothing but teasing as he looks up at you "I didn't know it was something that would find you so interested." you hand still rested in his hair, you give it a little tug for good measure as a response to his taunting, but your chiding action quickly backfires on you when Kazuha gasps breathlessly. Archons, he's going to kill you one day, one very close day if he keeps this up; - "It's just,,, something I didn't know about you." you shrug lamely, he fully laughs at that, you feel his trembling against you. "There are quite a few things that you don't know about me." he croons, hand coming to cup your chin, he had recently took up the habit to brush his thumb over your bottom lip, a gesture meant to pacify you, but really, again, he's going to kill you if he keeps this up; - "Like,,," you take a brief pause for a more dramatic effect "That you play the saxophone?" he looks at you, eyes wide in surprise, now it's your turn to laugh "You have a saxophone case in the corner of your room, and quite the stack of music sheets too. Though those seem to be written for piano." you muse, tapping your chin. The grin he offers you in response is nothing but proud at your keen observation "Good." he praises "I do in fact play both of those instruments. Though the music sheets are only for piano because I'm in a band and therefore tend to prioritize it."; - you let the information sit for awhile before speaking again. "Will you let me hear?" he hums appreciatively, turns his head to bury it in your stomach. "Do you want to?" you just nod at him, unable to conceal your excitement. He chuckles. It sounds like a promise.

Here’s some lil doodles for college kazuha^^ 

I got so carried away writing this-- I’m so sorry. I get like this when literature is involved. I miss taking French and German literature in high school so much ahh. Also excuse my lack of detailing when it came to Japanese literature, I’m quite rusty on that. 

[qhazomb]

I keep pinballing between monster Gordon designs in my head, and the most common contenders have been and owlbeast form like from The Owl House (bc him fluffy), that one humanoid design where his hair is super long and floaty and full of eyes, or a spiky dragon with near geometric scale spikes (bc the irony that his monster form is all sharp and pointy but his human form and personality are so soft and cuddly)

Bubby is usually the fire type of the group, so i always imagine monster Gordon with magma or plasma? Plasma maybe better, fits a celestial theme.

ooooh, that’s neat! i like the idea of monster gordon with plasma and lightning powers might have to incorporate that with the one i’m picturing. imagine electricity arching between his mane tendrils and whiskers and stuff, which signifies that something is about to get plasma breath’d also OOPS THIS PROMPTED ME TO SHARE A LOT OF THOUGHTS SO THIS GOT LONG, putting the rest under a read more ha ha

another thing about the monster gordon au i’ve been thinking about is that he’s not a straight-up cosmic entity like i picture benrey being, but more of just an alien from another dimension, like the critters from xen (he’s not from xen, though. whole ‘nother place entirely!) in this au, i still have gordon and benrey having known eachother as children, only this time gordon was the lil monster kid living in the woods, of course. and also, kid benrey actually saw his monster friend get carted off by black mesa! he saw the company’s logo on a vehicle or equipment or something, and never forgot it. benrey and his folks move to new mexico when he’s like, 13, and ends up befriending their new neighbor- a twenty-something guy named tommy. eventually, benrey learns that tommy’s working for this lab called black mesa, and when he sees the place’s logo he’s just !!!!!! and immediately decides he needs to try and get in that place. he doesn’t know shit or fuck about science, so trying to get a scientist job there is out. but maybe they’re hiring for like, a janitorial or security position? he’s pretty fit, and knows how to mop a floor and shoot a gun. so he goes for that. gordon still completely forgets his human childhood friend, though, awww. though that might be partially blamed on some of the experiments conducted on him. speaking of his time as a research specimen, he actually had it a tiny bit better than benrey did. didn’t take until he was in his teens before a much more caring scientist showed up to make sure he had good mental, emotional, and physical enrichment. and instead of that scientist being tommy, like for benrey... for gordon, it’s coomer. dad coomer momence :) they find gordon much more willing to cooperate after he imprints on coomer, too. and also take note of how active his curiosity is, with the alien asking so many questions and looking for so many answers for about how things work, especially when he hits his teens. somewhere along the line, some ‘mesa higher ups decide to let this xenoguy indulge his apparently scientific mind, and give him a job (he’s still required to check in for tests on himself, and not allowed to leave the facility, though). even tho he’s not an eldritch horror, he’s still got shape-shifting powers, and takes on a human form, both because all the spaces he’d work in were made with humans in mind, and to reduce the number of weird looks from literally everyone outside of sector E. and because he looked human, benrey didn’t recognize gordon at all, but also couldn’t shake this weird vibe he was getting from him. vibe increases after he sees this guy heading to do a dangerous test without one of the fancy hazard suits (being near-indestructable, he doesn’t need one). just before they get to where the test chamber is, and benrey asks him again why he doesn’t have a HEV suit if he’s really supposed to be here, gordon yells “BECAUSE I’M NOT FUCKING HUMAN, OKAY?? Now will you PLEASE let me go do my fucking job, I’m running so god damn late, christ...” the “not human” part is emphasized by gordon briefly showing a glimpse of his true form. which benrey instantly recognizes. ...aaaand then feels bad about the “i need to make sure you’re nice or not, everybody here’s afraid of you” thing. in this case, some of the other employees in sector C were afraid of gordon, as they knew what he was. benrey was a new hire and didn’t (obviously) and didn’t get why some of the scientists and guards were acting nervous around this seemingly friendly (if short-tempered) guy. but now he does. as well as why gordon looked a little self-conscious about it when benrey brought it up. whoops. even though monster!gordon doesn’t wear a HEV suit, he still has trackers that the military use to hunt the science team down. the trackers are just, y’know, in him. and unfortunately, nobody on the team knows exactly where they were stuck in him, and he doesn’t wanna just go clawing himself open everywhere to find the damn things. so the betrayal still happens, though benrey is def not feeling it as much, cause like, he JUST found his old alien friend and was gonna bust him out!! which obviously he can’t do if the fuckin’ military gets a hold of him. but then, he also can’t bust gordon out if he himself gets killed by the military... so turning gordon in is the lesser of two evils. turn him in now, and then try to free him again later. that’s the plan. of course, the bootboys ambushing gordon aren’t at all prepared. they weren’t properly informed on everything about gordon, and for about this whole time, gordon’s been taking on a human form. said form being considerably smaller than his true one. gordon does not black out and get tossed in (the wrong part of) a trash compactor. he does still get pissed at bubby and benrey, though. but this time, he forgives benrey first, as the guy gets way, WAY more emotional over this all than gordon’s ever seen from him. showing off a ton of genuine guilt and regret over it, and also explains why he did it right away (even tho gordon’s still convinced he and benrey never met until the test). bubby mostly just seems scared shitless, oops. but gordo does forgive him before it’s all said and done. they still run into coomer clones and less-than-stable bubby prototypes (which are now just clones as well because reasons). bubby’s not a genetically engineered perfect organism, but a regular/realistic ‘test-tube baby.’ he’s still got a bionic heart, though. coomer’s still a cyborg, too, but not really a super-powered one. his robotic limbs are just advanced in that they’re as dexterous as his old natural limbs, and have artificial touch receptors. they’re also made out of materials that are sturdy as all fuck. they’re just a couple of dudes, as far as physical abilities go. their clones, however? still very fucked up. possibly a little bit more fucked up. this au is also another “not a game” one, and there’s a different reason for why coomer’s clones seem to have a weird connection with gordon/gordon’s brain. bubby’s do, too. those clones aren’t just clones, but also results of genetic splicing experiments. i’ll let you guess where the other non-coomer/bubby genes that were spliced in came from. go on. guess. i haven’t thought about what happens when they get to xen too much. probably just that they fight the nihilanth, since i headcanon that it was indeed still the cause of the xen portals, but benrey ate it to steal its sick boss arena. gordon however wouldn’t do that, as he doesn’t get pissed at any of the team to, y’know, wanna go final boss on them. still gotta be the big hero man (even when he’s not technically a ‘man’). after they get back from xen, tommy prob manages to convince his dad to convince his employers to NOT lock gordon up in a lab again, as it would both mean a lot to his best friend benrey (who is like a little brother to him), and because he’s become fast friends with gordon himself and thus cares about him. i’m also trying to decide if i still want mr. coolatta to be an eldritch being or make him human, too. kinda leaning towards letting him stay non-human, though this time tommy doesn’t have any of the ‘buffs’ i say his adoptive dad gives him in my other not-a-game aus. aaaand that’s all the thoughts i’ve had on this thus far!

[noah-moth-cursed-chaos]

Emile-Hides told me about their self indulgent(and also super cool) Chzo Mythos au, so I have decided I shall reveal some stuff about mine as well, mostly just random details. Im p sure it diverges from canon quite a bit, especially the parts involving Chris Bc I can’t fully understand Chris’ canon for the life of me(It isn’t actually very complicated I’m just dense for some reason) Most of the first half of this has turned out to be rambling abt the TCS factors of my au specifically.

-Obviously, post TCS events, as I’ve mentioned before Trilby adopts a scuttler which he trains and raises, the scuttler becomes a soldier buzzer when it grows up. Trilby adores it.

-Trilby has a brother! The brother is my interpretation of one of the playable characters in TCS, but I won’t say which one.. yet.

-I wasn’t a huge fan of the paradox full circle 7DAS Malcolm being Trilby thing so I sorta made my own version? 7DAS Malcolm and his family are clones of Trilby and his family made by Chzo so Trilby could fully serve his purpose as a guide. Obviously they aren’t exactly identical because of the huge environmental and time differences.

-My version of the Wizard grew up in The Order Of Blessed Agonies. Her father was a devote member and her role model. Her blessed agony of the soul was supposed to be to kill him. She couldn’t do it. They locked her up and planned to sacrifice her, a member of the Ministry of Occultism however investegated the location, shut it down, and freed her. She then promised herself she’d stop The Order’s plans.

-The scholar kept a wallet with pictures of his family in it to remind him of why he was trying to stop the ancient. Eventually he got word of the murder of his wife and child and... gave up, sadly.

-The warrior found his car, and decided to use his notes to figure out what was happening and how to stop it, on the way he ran into the wizard, and they decided to work together to stop the ancient.

-The invading ancient was Chzo.

-Trilby was trying to find the ancient at the same time, he arrived at Stonehenge very shortly after the Warrior and Wizard had managed to banish Chzo. Trilby helped patched them up and they all talked and all that good stuff. Neither Trilby or the Wizard could really go back to their past at that point. Because of this the Warrior offered to let them stay with him. On the way out of Stonehenge was when Trilby found and grabbed Steve the scuttler.

Ok now on from TCS

-Chris has amnesia. He can’t remember much of what happened before the day his parents died. He also doesn’t remembered what happened to reverse his zombie-ness. He just knows he isn’t a zombie anymore.

-Chris lived with his parents in the house we see in the game, but didn’t have the best relationship with them. Because of this he also had a room at an appartment his friend stayed in(he insisted on helping her pay the rent despite her saying he didn’t have to). He and this friend had known each other since high school and were super close. He doesn’t remember hardly anything about her, but he read some of his old books and saw her name mentioned in the lists of people he thanked, so he does know whoever she was she was important to him.

-The mental hospital Chris stayed in was really a product of its time. The doctors didn’t understand much about the mental illnesses they were treating. Their practices weren’t great, and the psychology they relied on was flaky at best. Chris honestly ended up worse off because of it.

-Trilby did in fact meet Chris while trying to steal a ruby! And yes, they went on a date. Trilby was just trying to get out of trouble. Chris was quite flattered and thought there was more to it. They went their separate ways after that. A few years later when they run into each other when Trilby joins the Ministry, both are a bit shell shocked.

-After the hotel incident Trilby just entirely shut everyone out. He was terrified of everything. He was a mess. Most of the Ministry just brushed him off, another nobody who couldn’t handle the stress of the job. Chris reached out to him and tried to help him through everything. This is how they started getting close.

-When their handler at the time noticed that they were beginning to become friends, she(idk who their handler actually would’ve been so I just made someone up) started sending them on missions together, wanting to see how they’d work together in the field. They worked great, and therefore ended up a pretty well known duo in the ministry.

-Claire is good friends with both Chris and Trilby and is sorta a mother hen type. She’s always pestering them to take care of themselves and be responsible and all that. She’s a very sweet woman.

-Trilby took Simone’s death personally. He took all the deaths related to Chzo and Cabadath personally. Yes he wasn’t particularly close to most of the people, but he still should’ve stopped it. In his mind at least. He feels like since he’s directly connected to Chzo by fate, he shares partial responsibility for the suffering and death Chzo causes that he fails to stop.

-On a lighter note Trilby ended up sorta a father figure to Jim. They keep in contact through mail mostly. It’s part of what compelled Trilby to join the STP: ending up in jail, until Jim found out, would just look like he abandoned the poor kid. He didn’t want to do that to him.

-Trilby has dad instincts. Don’t fight me on this.

-Chris is that person who learns to make all the drinks his friends like so he can surprise them with them when they have a bad day.

-Chris keeps his bedsheets and himself extremely clean despite the rest of his appartment usually being a mess. He figures if he can’t keep up with all of it right now he should keep up with what helps him feel comfortable and work his way up.

-Trilby is the literal definition of organized chaos, his house, his office, all of it looks like a train wreck, but he knows exactly where everything is. It’s magical.

-Chris one time tried to adopt a hellhound. Nobody was exactly happy about that. Chris eventually had to send it back to hell.

-Chris acts shocked when Trilby curses despite Trilby doing it quite often.

-Trilby is more sentimental than you’d think. He keeps a lot of little trinkets and such to hold on to those he loves in a way. If you give him a gift, chances are he’s not getting rid of it unless he absolutely has to. Even then it’s not too likely he’s letting it go. His most treasured keepsake is his mother’s wedding ring.

-Chris can’t take good photos for the life of him. They all come out blurry or overexposed or grainy. He finds it infuriating but his friends find it hilarious.

-Trilby and Chris are those idiots who pine for each other constantly but neither can say crap. Claire just wished they’d get over themselves and kiss already.

[alwaysraineh]

author interview

tagged by @little-bi-kingtrashmouth sorry it took a whole day!! this was super fun tho tysm!! 

Name: rachel/rain, AlwaysRain on ao3

Fandoms: aaaaahahaha oh no this is an extensive question without meaning to be!! i’m in a lot of fandoms tho so i’ll just put down what’s currently holding my interest a lot as i try to write!! supernatural, the witcher, taz, omgcp  

Where You Post: ao3!! when i post, that is. i guess i sometimes post here also??? but it’s rarer bc honestly i’m a little apprehensive of trying to write for tumblr

Most Popular One-Shot: tell me, love (how destiny is bullshit) which is actually my most recent fic as well as my first witcher fic! i’m still absolutely blown away by the outpouring of love it’s gotten and this fandom is so nice that i just can’t wait until i finish another fic or two!! (��tell me, love’ is partially geraskier and partially found family but mostly self-indulgent fix-it fic)

Most Popular Multi-Chapter Story: according to ao3 stats (both hits and kudos) i think it looks like just breathe (i will stay) which is still a wip but i’m close to finishing it!! i have a lot of love for this fic tbh but a lot of that is because i made friends through this fic!! (its a modern au taakitz with a subplot involving the twins!)

Favorite Story You Wrote: OKAY loaded question lol but i think my favorite might be fields of gold???? i wrote it for the 2019 dcbb and its not necessarily the best thing in the world but i have a soft spot for it and one day i think i’d like to adapt it into a book (destiel apocalypse au heavy on the found family and healing old hurts)

Story You Were Nervous to Post: aahhhaha i get nervous before i post literally anything and i honestly have no clue which was worst. i’ve never posted my original fiction but that!!! is definitely what i’m most anxious about whenever i share it!!

How You Choose Your Titles: i ammmmm SO bad with titles and EVEN WORSE with summaries so generally i use song lyrics and then pester @tennisxiu for help with summaries until she’s sick of me

Complete: ha. completion isn’t exactly my strong suit but here’s a list!! (sidenote: wow some of these are.... older than i thought)

meet me halfway (taz balance, taakitz, hurt/comfort in which taako grieves lup)

fields of gold (spn, destiel, apocalypse au, dean harbors a fugitive angel)

where the lightning strikes (spn, destiel, summertime on the farm!!)

Until You (spn, destiel, prohibition and reincarnation)

The Mission (spn, gen, cas rescues dean from hell)

tell me, love (how destiny is bullshit) (the witcher, geraskier, found family and apologies)

Never Leave You (vld, shatt, major character death)

Numb (free!, makoharu, anggggssstttttt with a happy ending)(some of my earliest published work and.... hm. i’ll leave it there.)

In-complete: i don’t think i want to expose myself like that butttttt the list is surprisingly shorter than complete so i shall (i think.... two of these will get finished. the others are likely just abandoned bc dang)

just breathe (i will stay) (taz balance, taakitz, modern au, healing from trauma)

take my hand, take my whole life too (vld, shatt, matt has amnesia)

Serenading an Italian (hetalia, spamano, human au with fem!romano)

Home Is Anywhere You Are (spn, destiel, fairies au!!!)

Hunter’s Creek (spn, destiel, wild child au, fem!dean goes to boarding school)

Calm Chaos (spn, destiel, sam is in rehab with cas who is a mute pianist)

The Edge of Night (lotr, merry/pippin, college au (of sorts))

Do You Outline: lol i wish. naaahh i maybe make notes of a couple things i really want to include in a story but mostly i just go for it and slap some words on a page (i do outline my original work, to an extent, but that’s just because i really really really don’t want to lose all that)

Coming Soon/ Not Yet Started: technically????? nothing bc i have a lot of started work but none of it is coming soon

THAT SAID i have two nurseydex, two/three geraskier, one destiel, and a whole series of taz balance based in the same au as just breathe plus a chalice au featuring the twins

Do You Accept Prompts: ....... in theory. i would love to!!!!! i’m really bad at remembering to answer prompts but i really like getting them!!! so. yes!! in theory

Upcoming Story You Are Most Excited to Write: hmmmmm thats difficult bc my last three braincells are playing ping pong and taking turns with which one gets to be the ball so i regularly change interest and excitement BUT i am really really excited about my nurseydex fics and the witcher just in general so yeah

i have no clue how many people i’m meant to tag so @catladymarie and then anyone who wants to do this!!! its fun! feel free to @ me as the one who tagged you, i get really excited about other people’s work!!

[darlingsdontdie]

New Yandere, Whump, and Dark Shipping Blog: Requests FAQ

Hey! So before I start writing and creating, I thought I'd get some common questions answered and out of the way! If you are concerned about your request or are unsure of its content, please first check this post before directly messaging me.

Request Content

Q: What kinds of requests do you fill?

A: I will fill almost any type of request! But here are some specific options with set structures and examples.

Headcanon Requests (bulleted, length depending on ask, ex: "Can I get headcanons for Requested Character with a short girlfriend?")

Scenario Requests (bulleted, LDOA, ex: "Can I get a scenario for if Requested Ship were getting married?")

Drabble Requests (prose, LDOA, ex: "Can I request a drabble about RC being worried when their darling is sick?")

Playlist Requests (list of songs, 1-5 song limit, ex: "Do you have 4 songs for a jealous RC?")

Graphic Requests (edit style, 1-4 images, ex: "Could you make a graphic for yandere RC with this item or quote?")

Aesthetic Requests (moodboard style, image with 6-9 sections, ex: "Can I get an aesthetic for dark!RS?")

Prompt Requests (list of brainstormed dialogue and short sentences, LDOA, ex: "Do you have dialogue prompts for RC kidnapping their darling?")

Plot Bunny Requests (short prose paragraphs or bulleted, LDOA, ex: "I want to write about yandere RC surprising their darling but don't know how or why. Are there are any plot bunnies you can give me?").

New! RP Idea Requests (selection of 1-4 short rp-style bios/plots/starters, LDOA, ex: "Do you have any yandere rp ideas for Requested Fandom ocs?")

New! Fancast Requests (moodboard or edit style, 2-9 images per RC/RS, ex: "Who would you cast as yandere RC(s)?")

New! Faceclaim Recommendation Requests (bulleted list of names with short explanations or reasons, LDOA, ex: "My yandere OC is tall, has dark hair, and soft features. He acts friendly but is the violent type. Can I have a few fcs?")

Requests that don't specify will be answered with a bulleted list or possibly a short paragraph. There may be times I'm willing to fill some requests but not others due to time constraints, but that doesn't mean I won't ever fill them!

Fandom requests involving AUs and crossovers are welcome (ex: "Headcanons of how yandere Naruto in a wild west AU?" or "Headcanons about what would happen if yandere Ten and yandere Crowley fell for the same person?"), as are original requests based on existing media (ex: "Can I get headcanons about a popular girl type who has a Breakfast Club experience and ends up going yandere for the criminal?" or "Can you write a drabble about a yandere whose story is like this music video?").

Q: What characters do you write for?

A: I'll write for any character that I am familiar with, with a few exceptions for characters I'm aware of but uncomfortable with. To get started, here's a list of fandoms that I have a solid handle on!

Anime (Naruto, Ouran High School Host Club, Death Note, Hetalia, etc.)

Western Animation (Archer, Castlevania, She-Ra: Princesses of Power, etc.)

DC and Marvel Comics

Star Wars (no New Trilogy - Originals, Prequels, Clone Wars, & Legends only)

Other Major Film Franchises (Pirates of the Caribbean, the MCU, James Bond, etc.)

Harry Potter and related properties

Percy Jackson and related properties

Hunger Games and related properties

Twilight and related properties

A Song of Ice and Fire (willing to try TV canon but much more familiar with Book canon)

Crime Dramas (Barry, Good Girls, Hannibal, Mr. Robot, Revenge, etc.)

Historical Drama (Vikings, The Tudors, Les Miserables, The Borgias, Downton Abbey, Peaky Blinders, Taboo, etc.)

Science Fiction and Fantasy TV/Lit (Star Trek TOS/AOS; Doctor Who, New Who only; Merlin; Good Omens; Lucifer; Galavant, etc.)

Horror-Thriller TV/Lit (American Horror Story, The Haunting of Hill House, Hemlock Grove, Alias Grace, etc.)

Sitcoms (familiar with Friends, all the Michael Schur products, Community, That 70s Show, Jane the Virgin, Schitt's Creek, Superstore, IASIP, and others)

Teen Dramas (Teen Wolf, Pretty Little Liars, Freaks and Geeks, Glee, etc., but no Riverdale)

Chinese and Korean Dramas (A Korean Odyssey/Hwayugi, Meteor Gardens, A Love So Beautiful, What's Wrong With Secretary Kim, Romance Is a Bonus Book, My First First Love, Black, etc.)

Video Games (Assasain's Creed, Portal 2, Fire Emblem, AFK Arena, Professor Layton, etc.)

Something that's not here can still be requested - I'm familiar with a lot of media and do my best to keep up.

As I implied above, I am also happy to write for original characters. Whether that means you telling me about your own OCs, or me creating my own characters for you down the line, either is great.

I will NOT be writing RPF or RPS. I do not approve of real person shipping and real person fiction makes me uncomfortable - if that's what you're looking for, there are a huge number of other blogs that will cater to your needs directly. Which leads me into...

Prohibited Requests, and Non-Yandere Content

Q: Will you fill every request you get?

A: I'll fill requests that interest me and that I feel comfortable posting, and that will probably be most of them! I am really excited to get started. But I still reserve the right to refuse a prompt - I'm writing for free, so no one is entitled to have their ask filled. If I choose to deny your prompt, I will answer privately and, if the issue is with content, update the blog so it's made clear that the type of prompt is not taken.

Q: What is and isn't allowed to be requested?

A: To be honest, most stuff is allowed and some stuff isn't. There's a lot of ground to cover here, so I've divided it based on the nature of the concern.

Q: Do you accept NSFW/SFW requests?

A: I'll do NS and SFW work, but I've got more experience with SFW content. This doesn't mean I do it exclusively, just that I won't think to go NS unless you mention it. Specify for NS and it'll be included happily!

Q: Do you accept violent requests?

Violence against non-SO characters and dub-con is okay always, as is situational or over-the-top violence, even murder, involving SOs (ex: "the yandere and their darling are soldiers on opposite sides of the war" or "the yandere saws off their darling's legs so they have to carry them everywhere").

However, there is some tricky area with violent fantasies. If I think the content strays too close to serious physical domestic abuse, then I'll likely deny the request. This is partially why I prefer requests that get violent to focus on non-SO targets, so if it doesn't matter to you, that's almost guaranteed to get a response.

Non-con I can mention and discuss in headcanon posts and possibly prompt lists, but I will not be writing drabbles or scenarios for non-con prompts.

Q: Do you accept kink requests?

A: It will depend on the type and whether I feel morally and psychologically comfortable with it. For example, hypnosis, size kink, gender stuffing, BDSM, roleplay, etc., are all currently accepted because they don't seem to affect me in a negative way. I am willing to do ships for cousins and step family, as well. However, I will not under any circumstances deal with r*ceplay, p*dophilia, fetishizing of trans people or people of color, or inc*stplay, and I will not be doing ship work for anyone more closely related than cousins, including but not limited to siblings, parents (blood or adopted), or aunts and uncles. None of this is negotiable. I am willing to consider AUs where two characters aren't family, or non romantic yandere behavior between family, but even then, the request's on thin ice. Anything super unhygienic or illness related is probably something I won't be interested in not as a rule or for moral reasons but just because it can exacerbate my anxiety and OCD. I also do not fill prompts related to minors at all, be it explicit/adult/sexual content or otherwise. Requests for characters who are minors will have them aged up unless otherwise specified - in which case you will promptly be blocked.

Q: Can I request a dark imagine that is not yandere related?

A: Of course! Just make sure to be specific about what you want from it.

Q: Can I request a ship or character imagine that isn't yandere or dark?

A: Yes, though I won't promise it'll be what you're looking for. I fall towards horror, thriller, and angst when I write, regardless of my intentions.

Q: Can I request something that's not ship or character imagine related?

A: Sure, I'd be honored, but again, I don't promise to fulfill every request. This blog is intended to be stress relief, self indulgence.

How to Make a Request

Q: How do I contact you for requests?

A: Asks, messages, replies on my original posts, and even more casual things like tagging me in yandere or writing related posts are all great ways to interact with me!

Q: When do you accept requests?

A: Requests will be opened or closed depending on how busy I am and whether I'm caught up on them.

Currently, requests are closed. However, I've decided that requests are reopened on my days off. The days should be listed in my bio.

Q: Do you accept anonymous requests?

A: Yes, I do! I also will not publish asks from users unless the user specifically clarifies that they are okay with it, just in case the user sent the ask from their blog on accident. User asks that aren't specified as safe to publish will be responded to privately when the request is filled.

Q: How will I know my request is filled?

A: As stated above, anonymous asks and user asks clarified as safe to publish will be published with a response. User asks without any clarification will be responded to privately. Anonymous asks asking for privacy for any reason will not be published. Messages will also get a reply. Users who send requests that are kept private will not be tagged unless you ask me to. Users with published asks will always be tagged in the final post, but it is totally okay to ask me to change or erase the tag! Other than this, checking for posts is up to the requester.

Other Kinds of Interaction

Q: Is there anyone who you don't want interacting with your blog?

A: Anyone complicit in nazism, racism, transphobia, homophobia, misogyny, xenophobia, pedophilia/MAPs, or any other politicized violence against a people is uneqivocally not welcome to engage with my work. I also have a zero tolerance policy for true crime fans who support or absolve serial killers. Please respect this - anyone who doesn't will be blocked. Anyone who pushes the issue will be reported.

Q: What about kink or otherkin blogs?

A: Honestly, I don't know much about either community. As of now, I'm fine with interaction. I'd ask that I not receive any kin related requests, because I am not familiar with the concept, community, and issues accompanying. Kinks can be requested but as stated above, are not guaranteed to be filled. Please don't bring discourse or discourse related requests here. I am not equipped to or interested in getting involved. If that changes, I have a main and other side blogs. This blog will never be a place for it.

Q: Are you okay if we interact with you or send you asks and messages that aren't requests?

A: Absolutely! I would love to talk with you. I am always interested in discussing any of the topics covered on this blog, or anything else for that matter! I pride myself on trying to be not just nice, but kind, and hopefully that comes through in every interaction. However, I'll expect the same courtesy from anyone who'd reach out to me, or use my posts to communicate to others for that matter. Anyone who doesn't will be, you guessed it, blocked. Anyone who pursues it further, yeah, will be reported.

Q: You have a lot of rules about requests and interaction, but you don't seem to post much and you aren't very active. Is this all just awkward and formal overkill, or is there a point?

A: I've explained all of this clearly, in as an accessible way as I can think of, because I want to eliminate the potential for drama, confusion, and other misunderstandings.

Online communities tend to be chock-full of plenty and I do not, nor does anyone who visits, need another reason to be tired. I'm not detailing all of this upfront because I expect to be very popular, or because I like listening to myself talk for paragraphs on end. I don't want a theoretical lack of information to be used to hurt either myself or others, though some of it shouldn't have to be spelled out in the first place.

But considering how ridiculously easy it is to misinterpret each other online, and how much of a disadvantage neuroatypical people like myself are when things are left just implicit rather than made what you could argue as exhaustingly explicit, I figured a crazy FAQ was a small price to pay for a peaceful environment.

TLDR: it certainly might be overkill, but that doesn't mean there is no point to it.

Q: What should requesters and followers call you anyways?

A: I'm fine with my username. If you're going for a different vibe, Red or Darlings sounds nice too. If you can come up with something catchier, feel free to try!

💀💀💀

On that note, I also may be slow going when it comes to requests. All I can do is promise to put a lot of thought into my replies, even though speed is not guaranteed. Any other questions can be asked directly, and I would be more than happy to answer them!

[wanderingthroughwickford]

Thank you! My responses are super long (especially for M asdflkasdfjkasdf) so most of them will be under a cut.

A – How did you come up with the title to [insert fic]?

Since no fic was specified, I think I’ll just go back through some of the ones I’ve got up on FFN. Most of them are pretty self-explanatory, to be honest. ‘Eternity’ is so named because Myrtle is stuck at Hogwarts, in her teenage form and mindset, for, well, eternity. ‘And Then There Was One’ (a probably discontinued Hunger Games/Nancy Drew crossover) is also fairly obvious; it’s the Hunger Games so it’s inevitably going to come down to one person, and I also couldn’t resist shoehorning in a completely unnecessary reference to And Then There Were None since it’s also based off a mystery series. ‘Unstained’ refers to Wiress’ promise in the game to not ‘stain’ herself by committing murder in the games, and if I ever write its sequels they’ll follow the ‘Un’ formula – I’ve always intended the final fic in the prospective trilogy to be called ‘Unchained,’ but we’ll see if I ever get there.

I think the one that actually gave me the most trouble coming up with a title was ‘Goodbye,’ a Pirates of the Caribbean one-shot I wrote way back in 2009. I couldn’t seem to come up with a clever enough title for the fic, until I asked my mom for help and she suggested simply ‘Goodbye.’ I decided that in this case, less was more, and so the title stuck.

C – What character do you identify with most?

The ones that I’ve written for, I guess this means? I suppose I’ll have to go with Myrtle and Wiress. Although they definitely both have more tragic lives than I do, I still put a lot of myself into them – I outright headcanon Wiress as having Asperger’s Syndrome and being uninterested in romance, so I find her quite easy to write in that way, and a lot of her moralistic, somewhat self-righteous attitude at the beginning of Unstained (which she’ll eventually grow out of, fortunately) draws a lot from how I now see myself as having acted as a young teenager. Her somewhat morbid obsession with past Hunger Games and their victims has roots in my own (sometimes borderline depressing) fascination with shipwrecks such as the Titanic and Lusitania. 

Myrtle I headcanon with some sort of unspecified mental illness, or at least deep insecurities and oversensitivity, and having trouble making and keeping friends. Her friendship with Murcia draws on some of the tentative friendships I had with girls in older grades, and – though this didn’t come through in the story for various reasons that would take a whole other ask to explain, and which I’m not entirely satisfied with but anyway – I definitely see Myrtle as having had a complicated crush on her, but never fully recognizing or accepting it for what it was because she wasn’t raised in a time or a society where girls loving other girls was normalized. Which, again, big part of my teenage years. Plus, the social awkwardness, introversion, and anxiety that both girls have is something I definitely relate to in general.

F – Care to share a favourite hurt/comfort fic?

Oh boy, that’s a tall order as there are so many, but the two that jump to mind immediately are Intersection by yadon/Copernicus Jones/Jake-Marshall and Pity the Child by Tanglepelt/Bookworm555. Intersection holds a very special place in my heart as it was written by my friend Leanne, featuring one of her favorite Ace Attorney characters, Jake Marshall, interacting with my OC Denise Swallow. Pity the Child was written by my friend Becca and involves two more of my faves – America and Latvia from Hetalia – having heartwarming interactions. Both are very good fics.

M – Got any premises on the back burner that you’d like to share?

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahaha

Well

It’d be easier to list fics I’ve actually completed than fics that are in various stages of planning

But if you insist

(This is the super LONG part and gets a little emotional towards the end) 

The fic that I’d most like to complete within the foreseeable future is ‘Unstained,’ my story about Wiress’ Hunger Games. I’d say it’s about half-finished now, and I haven’t updated it in almost 4 years. That might change in the future; I’d like to get at least a few more chapters done this summer, but I don’t think it’s humanly possible to get it finished before I leave for Ontario, and then I’ll be so busy for a solid year that I doubt I’ll be able to write anything. And that’s not even counting the two prospective sequels I’d like to write. But even finishing this fic would be a major life accomplishment for me, as it’s one of those that I’m proudest of.

Then I have at least three fics about my Ace Attorney OC, Denise Swallow, which I’d like to write, though they’ll probably all be one-shots. Two of them are partially written, one isn’t even started yet. One of them would be a brief overview of the few times she met Dahlia Hawthorne, the infamous culprit who ended up murdering her brother. Another one, the longest and weightiest of the three, would involve her meeting Phoenix Wright and Maya Fey, who channels the spirit of her brother so that she can properly say good-bye. The last one would involve her meeting up with Dahlia’s sister, Iris, and coming to some sort of closure there.

A lot of my fic-writing is taking a backseat to a much more personal fic-universe-of-sorts that I’m working on, involving practically all of my favorite fandoms thrown together into an incredibly complicated storyline. It’s completely self-indulgent and not something I’d really want to share a lot about here, but one of the major plotlines I’m constructing in it would involve a villain-to-anti-hero redemption arc for Lucy Bauer from Agents of Shield. I’ll admit that I have toyed, very briefly, with the idea of converting this into proper FanFiction if and when I ever complete it, but that’s honestly very unlikely because 1) I’d have to remove it from its crossover context, 2) I’d have to insert it into either AoS season 5 canon, which hasn’t even been filmed yet, or an alternate version of season 5, and 3) it seems completely implausible within the story’s canon. Plus, there’s the inevitable ‘no one would read it’ problem. 

In the past couple months I’ve considered writing an And Then There Were None Hunger Games AU, as well as a brief oneshot about Soldier Island being haunted by the ghosts of the ATTWN victims, but I’m very unlikely to do anything with those. There’s still my Nancy Drew Hunger Games AU left unfinished, but if I get back to that, it’ll be entirely as a way to blow off steam, rather than to try and write anything especially good. Just today I was attacked by the idea of writing a Lord of the Rings fic about Aragorn returning Boromir’s arm braces to Faramir and telling him how his brother died, but again, just a passing fancy that I’m very unlikely to write.

And that’s just the tip of it. There are so many FanFiction ideas I’ve considered writing and abandoned. The 8 fics I have up on FFN are the few lucky ideas that actually came to fruition, even though a good deal of them are unfinished as well. I’m honestly amazed that I was even able to finish ‘Eternity,’ or get as far as I have on ‘Unstained.’ I have an X-Men Evolution fic up that was originally supposed to be a multichap of 10-15 chapters, and it hasn’t been updated since 2011. When I was in high school I planned out a whole series of Pirates of the Caribbean fics chronicling James Norrington’s life, from childhood until his death, but I only ever got the first chapter of one written and never posted it. (Partially because I sort of balked at the HUGE amount of research I’d planned to do on 18th-century naval life for that fic). I’d like to go back to this one idea I had for a Hetalia fic, a series of one-shots about times in which the characters have wished they were humans rather than nations, but again, research would be necessary and it’s so draining.

That’s the problem. I love thinking up ideas and planning stories and having them finished, but at the end of the day, the act of writing itself is such a chore for me. And I hate that. I wish I could write effortlessly, like I used to as a kid, but I haven’t been able to do so since I was 12 or so. Which, coincidentally, is the time my depression started to majorly set in. I don’t know if the two are connected, but I can’t help but wonder if mental illness robbed me of a pastime that I dearly loved, and of countless fics I could have written by now.

(I know this is long and cheesy and overemotional, but cut me some slack, it’s almost 1 am) 

O – How do you begin a story – with the plot, or the characters?

You know, this is strange, because when I first saw this question I thought, of course I start with the plot, who would just say “I want to write a story about [character]” without even having any idea of what the plot would be yet? And then I realized that that’s exactly what I do – start with a character I want to write about and come up with a plot based off that. In fact, most of my stories aren’t even plot-driven much as just general looks into the lives of certain characters.

Y – A character you want to protect

Hah, it seems like the characters I want to protect and the characters I end up putting through torture are exactly the same. The two that jump to mind right away are – my sun and my stars and everything, the one and only APH Latvia, and my precious ghostly daughter, Myrtle Warren (Moaning Myrtle). And yet I endlessly read fics in which the former, and wrote a fic in which the latter, suffers. Whoops.