#also all you fools without christmas icons

[ninjawitdaddyissues]

15 years of Dan & Phil - Major Arcana

It struck me that there has been 15 years since Dan and Phil met and my little goose brain connected that to the devil card number 15 (symbolised in dnpcrafts video) and so now you get a large post of me analysing year by year dnp in the major arcana.

DISCLAIMER: this is just for fun and because i am a silly jester who needed to feel joy while on video call with a friend. do not take any of this seriously, i am just a goofy guy with an internet connection and too much time.

The Fool - 0

we start at the fool, 2009.

"The Fool is young and vulnerable. He has not yet experienced the ups and downs of life, leaving him unaware of the magnitude of life's challenges, as well as the potential he holds. When The Fool comes up in a Tarot reading, you are encouraged to take on his open, willing energy and embrace all that lies ahead of you without worry."

The year dnp meet. The start of the journey. The fool is considered the main character of the Major arcana journey. Thus Dan and Phil are the main characters of this story, their story.

Both unaware of what the future holds for them, their life™ was only just at conception. I feel like this one is very self explanatory in context of them just having met, we as the audience are just introduced to the concept of Dan and Phil.

The fool energy (open, willing) is especially evident in videos like PINOF 1 and The Interactive Christmas Adventure where their silliness, and creativity really shine. This is an era of open, easy (almost naive) energy.

The Magician - 1

The year is 2010...

"The Magician card is a reminder that you are unique and have many gifts. These skills set you apart from the crowd and can help you begin new projects or overcome adversity. When The Magician comes up in your Tarot reading, it's a reminder that you already hold everything you need to move forward and accomplish what you've set out to do."

The year of Dan moving to Manchester and starting his Law Degree and Phil getting his flat in Manchester, PINOF2, Jamaica trip, and the conception of the forbidden video. We also have creative bangers such as "the inflatable lion of destiny", 'Blindfolded Catface Game', 'Dan and Phil get down' and 'The TREE'.

The boys are creating core parts of the Dan and Phil universe without knowing it. Together they have all the ingredients needed (see in the card imagery; the wand, cup, pentacle and sword) to create a fanbase and a successful career.

The High Priestess - 2

2011 baybeeeeee

"The most intuitive, connected card in the whole Tarot deck, The High Priestess is a card of awareness. This card urges you to listen to your inner voice and follow your instincts. Your mind knows far more than you think. When this card arises in your Tarot reading, stop looking for answers in the outside world. Turn within for the guidance you seek."

We have the Manchester apartment™, PINOF 3, the forbidden video leak and the first radio show. The relation to this, to me, really comes up in the forbidden video response. Having to turn inwards, the boys became insular, guarded and a wall was really put up between them and the audience to protect themselves. We can't speak to exactly what was happening for them internally and only make our assumptions based on what they outwardly expressed at the time.

The Empress - 3

2012

"The Empress is the most feminine card in the Tarot, and greatly encourages compassion, beauty, and love. She is deeply connected to Mother Nature, and her influence is powerful when you absorb the energy of the natural world around you."

"This supreme archetype of femininity also symbolizes fertility. It is The Empress who provides us nourishment and security. She is also sometimes seen as delighting us with flowers and fruit."

We have entered younow era. They also move to London this year, Dan officially drops out of uni, we get PINOF 4 and a second radio show. We also have the iconic tweet 'FYI i like vagina'. This year is known for being a difficult year in the Phandom. It has a reputation for 'no homo howell' and generally the boys being more reserved and insular with what and how they shared their lives.

In relation to The Empress card I think we can draw particularly on security. We know they had a stalking problem at the London apartment - a threat to their physical security, fans being hectic about their sexualities (particularly Dan) - a threat to their privacy. We also have Dan getting an influx of 'are you gay' on younow and having to reassert his ' straightness' lends itself to the femininity of this card. He had to play straight in order to keep himself safe. This card being for 2012 when we know they really withdrew from sharing themselves with us is quite the oxymoron but despite the withdrawing of their sharing with the audience we know they still had great success (got their flowers) in the coming years.

The Emperor - 4

2013

"The Emperor is a card of leadership and power. He is an authoritative force who has been through many experiences to achieve this status. He represents structure and solidity, and reminds you that you, too, hold immense amounts of power over your own life, and what happens to it."

THE BRITISH VLOGGER BOOM IS UPON US. The boys have gone through some shit™ at this point and are starting to establish themselves as Entertainers. They are on the grind, they are moving in the direction of establishing themselves as entertainers/presenters in the mainstream space marked by the beginning of the request radio show. Their Youtube numbers climb as does their power in the online world. As for them holding power over their own lives, I know Dan has mentioned not feeling in control of things like his audience at this point. But I think this card speaks to them really gaining control over their future career wise as a duo - even if they didn't fully see themselves as such yet.

We also have the Charlie Skies twitter fiasco this year - another threat to their privacy. Through this Dan in particular had to trust in the power he had over his own narrative in redirecting attention and deflecting Charlie's online attacks. He blocked him and protected his peace and as a result not a whole lot of the phandom knows about this beef. Dan and Phil are nothing if not good at diversion, distraction and hiding things from the internet (good for them).

The Hierophant - 5

2014

"The Hierophant is like a messenger from the heavens. He is experienced in spirituality and guidance, and his job is to bring these lessons down to us here in the real world. When The Hierophant comes up in your Tarot reading, you're encouraged to follow the rules, and to find a spiritual perspective on your current situation."

"Before him kneel two followers. The Hierophant’s task is to pass down his spiritual wisdom and initiate the two into the church so they can take up their appointed roles. This imagery speaks to a shared group identity and a rite of passage to enter the next level. The crossed keys at The Hierophant’s feet represent the balance between the conscious and subconscious minds and the unlocking of mysteries, which only he can teach."

This year brings us the first Brit awards hosting, the radio show transitioning to the Internet Takeover, Dan and Phil Games and the channels continuing to grow. This card in particular I think relates to them and their relation to the BBC. In this card they are the two people in front of the Hierophant, learning and having knowledge bestowed upon them. This was a year of developing their careers into a new phase of mainstream TV palatability. Dan and Phil are stepping into previously unchartered spaces for just a couple of guys on the internet.

The Lovers - 6

2015

"The Lovers card represents the close relationships in your life. If it comes up in your Tarot reading, your love life is in need of extra attention. However, this is just as much a card about your values and decisions. You may find The Lovers come up when you are at a crossroads. Consider all the possible consequences of your choices."

Significant events this year include; TABINOF, TATINOF, Dan and Phil crafts, Japhan part 1, Brit Awards hosting and the channels growing. Japhan happening this year with the lovers card showing up is very sweet. Dan and Phil knew they had big events coming up for them in their lives so they carved out space for them to enjoy existing together by going to Japan.

We also know that at this point Dan and Phil were looking to move on from the TV Host type of space they found themselves in with the BBC. A crossroads of where they wanted to take the world of Dan and Phil�� . That gave way to TABINOF and TAINOF, stepping into an unknown space of Youtubers doing stuff in the real world once again. Phil mentioned in his video, 'Draw my LIfe 2' that they really had to trust that this was the correct move for them. A crossroads where they had to consider the consequences when investing their money into TABINOF and TATNIOF.

The Chariot - 7

2016

"The Chariot card is connected to your natural drive and determination, and can indicate an upcoming victory. This card reminds you that your greatest successes won't come through limited thinking -- when you combine the knowledge of your mind with that of your heart and spirit, you are an unstoppable force."

This year brought alot of reaping on benefits of putting trust in the crossroads that the Lovers card presented. We see the end of the Internet Takeover, the final Brit Awards hosting and the end of the TATINOF era. They combined their mind, heart and spirit and came out successful, winning 4 awards this year and having the huge success of TATINOF. They didn't allow themselves to be limited (by the BBC) and they succeeded. So, if they could achieve a world tour and a best selling book on their own... well what could come next??

Strength - 8

2017

"The Strength card represents courage, the fortitude of your heart, and your ability to withstand anything life hands you. If this card arises in your Tarot reading, you are reminded that you're strong enough to handle whatever you are facing and will come out of it with even more power than you had before."

This year, the boys move to their new London apartment (the fake apartment), Interactive Introverts is announced, Dan goes curly and the end of danisnotonfire branding.

We know from the video 'Dan and Phil Finally Tell the Truth' that Dan had begun to realise he couldn't stay in the closet any longer, which led to his mini breakdown on the balcony. He stated that he was worried if they went on tour with introverts he was going to have a very public meltdown. We also got the video 'Daniel and Depression'. Between the two of these things we can see how the strength card really came into play this year.

Phil has also talked about how they didn't know how they were going to get everything done this year. With Introverts tour looming, they were inundated with work and they really had to grin and bare through it. They had to trust their strength as a duo that they would come through this time together.

The Hermit - 9

2018

"The Hermit yearns to be alone. He knows that the only way to process what is happening in life is to withdraw from the noise of the world and create a quiet space of solitude. When The Hermit comes up in your reading, the answers you need will come from within. Be very still, and listen..."

This year is the year of the Interactive Introverts tour, the final PINOF, the gaming channel hiatus and Dan's video 'trying to live my truth'. The Hermit coming up in a year of them going into hiatus, is just very nail on the god damn head. I mean what card could be more relevant? It seems so self explanatory, I don't even know what to say.

The boys had to turn inward once again to assess where to go next in their careers. They talk about pausing to take stock of what they have done and where they will go.

Dan took a huuuuuge step back to go inwards and process everything he had been holding in and pushing through in the previous years as they were so busy with their career building. This was a year where they gave themselves permission to slow down and finally look inward for where to go next. This introversion beginning is seen at the start of 2018 in Dan's 'Trying to Live My Truth' video.

We also have Phil with his dizzy spells during this year meaning there was less amazingphil content. This could also be seen as an introversion. He had to slow down his public career of take care of himself and focus on his health.

The Wheel of Fortune - 10

2019

"The Wheel of Fortune is constantly revolving -- sometimes you will be at the top, and sometimes you will be at the bottom. This Tarot card reminds you that nothing is permanent, and, good or bad, you must cherish the lessons that this moment is bringing you."

"Good luck, karma, life cycles, destiny, a turning point"

Bare with me while I desperately try to refrain from top and bottom jokes due to the concision of the wheel of fortune card and dnp coming out in the same year. But truly this card represents a turning point and a destiny fulfilment. If BIG and COTY are not a destiny fulfilment and turning point then I don't know what is! The boys are living their truth, they are moving into a new era.

Justice - 11

2020

"Justice is your firm-but-fair reminder that there is a consequence for every action. Whatever life is handing you at this moment comes from decisions you and others have made in the past, reflecting natural cause-and-effect. When this card comes up in your Tarot reading, make sure you are acting fairly in all your interactions with others."

Libra card!!!! This year we have covid hitting, a quiet year for content all round. We have the stereo shows starting up at the end of the year along with the phouse announcement. This year also featured Steve the pigeon (pigeon fest/rescuing a pigeon video).

When we look at cause and effect, the phouse is what comes to mind. They worked themselves so hard in the years previous and they were able to buy and design their forever home. The cause and effect of them coming out is also seen in their ability to be open with the audience that they are continuing to not only live together but purchase and build property together. If they had not come out, things like buying a house together would've raised so many more questions and possibly caused more issues for them and their privacy (fan speculation). This new era really hinged on them coming out and setting themselves up as an ambiguous couple. In this case the cause and effect really benefitted them.

The Hanged Man - 12

2021

"The Hanged Man tells you that sometimes small sacrifices are required to benefit the bigger picture. When The Hanged Man arises in your reading, you likely want to make a move but don't know where to begin. Lightening your grip on what's no longer working for you, or detaching from the outcome of your situation, can help you release yourself."

This year gives us the first joint video since 2018 in the form of 'something we want to tell you'. This marks Dan's return to being perceived online. Subsequently we have the book release in May, YWGTTN, and they move into the somewhat uncompleted phouse.

We get many iconic videos this year showing a shift in their on camera dynamic - a loosening grip on the wall they built up with the audience during the early years. They let us in on alot more of those moments that drive us absolutely insane, the smiles were off the charts and we started eating good again. They have begun trusting the audience with more of their authentic selves and silly dynamic. In Phil's recent video where he looks at old profile pics, he talks fondly about the silly icon pic from him and Dan during lockdown.

I think the sentiment of no longer caring what people think is really echoed in this years content. The boys are self assured and care less about what people have to say because they are successful and have nothing to hide.

The hanged man is shown in this loosening grip on hiding parts of themselves and allowing themselves to trust the audience more knowing that whatever the outcome they have each other and that in enough.

Death - 13

2022

"One of the most misunderstood Tarot cards, Death is not a card about physical death. The Death card speaks of cycles and is a reminder that all things must pass. Hanging on to situations from the past will hinder you from allowing new, better things to enter your life. In every ending lies a chance for a new beginning."

wad year/DD/wiqy

What can I say. Death card for WAD year? It just makes sense. A year where Dan and Phil spent the most time apart since they met in 2009, taking a break from the cycle of their everyday life.

We also got Dan's WIQY video, again reflecting on the last few years and essentially announcing his burn out. Giving up on being Youtube's 'golden boy' by speaking his mind about how he was effected by circumstances beyond his control.

Then we have WAD. The show being reflective of his past and the future for the earth. This year truly felt like a rebirth for Dan specifically. He was back on the internet, Dystopia Daily, being able to openly make gay jokes. He went back out into the world and found meaning in existence again. And once that meaning was obtained, he went back to Phil. A new beginning in how they both show up online, unapologetically themselves.

Temperance - 14

2023

"The Temperance card is a master of moderation. She encourages peace and patience, and reminds you to go with the flow of your life instead of trying to force its pace or direction. When Temperance turns up in your Tarot reading, it is a message to take things as they come, and remain flexible enough to change with the changes."

2023 brought us more DD, end of WAD, The 3rd Japhan trip, the Phude, and the return of the gaming channel.

This is a year of things slowly going back to routine for DnP. Dan comes back from tour, they go on holiday to Japan. Up until the gaming channel coming off hiatus 2023 was seemingly a chill flux and flow for dnp. The flow (this is a water heavy card) of their life returned to normal.

While DnP certainly didn't make this comeback with moderation (leaping straight into spooky week and then gamingmas as well as merch drops) they wouldn't have come back without a serious plan to keep their workaholic tendency's in check.

The Devil - 15

2024

"The Devil card carries themes of restraint and powerlessness. When it comes up in your Tarot reading, you are likely feeling stuck. The Devil has convinced you that you have no options, but this couldn't be further from the truth. You hold the keys to your own freedom, but it's up to you to open the lock."

So we all know the crafty video from this year has direct symbolism to the devil card. There have been many great analyses between the two so I won't go into that as much here. But what I will say is that I see this card for this year as an unshackling of themselves. We see them far more open and willing to trust the audience to be in on the joke rather than and us vs. them situation of the 2012 era. So rather than them feeling stuck I believe this symbolises them no longer being stuck and stepping into their most honest selves while still maintaining their boundaries.

That concludes my wee dive into dnp lore and how it relates to the major arcana. I am not someone with a huge amount of knowledge on tarot (just a wee bit from my own experience of doing a card read every so often but certainly not someone who has ever studied tarot), so if you are big on tarot absolutely chime in and add to this!! I am also so sure I missed dnp lore but hey I did what I could! Also big ty to @boardgamedanny for being on video call with me for 2 days in a row to suggest things and pipe in and also distract me horrendously. Also biiig thanku to my friend, Peter, who isn't on here but sparked this whole thing, with their tarot knowledge and my dnp brain encyclopedia.

now sources!!

[patrickmdunn]

every simpsons ever: the simpsons christmas special, or, not quite episode one

If you’re a person of a certain age—cough 43—this was probably your initiation into the wild, wonderful world of Springfield. Everyone watched it. And by everyone, I mean my entire second-grade class. The day after it aired, we gathered like a council of cartoon critics in the school cafeteria during indoor recess. Because, naturally, in cold New England, that’s where we burned off our winter wiggles, and dissected this bizarre new show. Back then, we didn’t realize it was the start of a series; we all just assumed it was some weird one-off fever dream. I mean, I was way too young to even know what The Tracey Ullman Show was, so these wacky yellow characters were completely foreign to me.

But there was one thing we all agreed on: we all wanted to be Bart Simpson. This kid was the ultimate rebel—edgy, cool, and completely fearless. I mean, he got a tattoo at the mall and dropped the iconic line, "I'm Bart Simpson, who the hell are you?" It was like watching the '90s version of Dennis the Menace, only way more badass. And, mind you, the '90s were still a few weeks away. Bart was already ahead of the curve, showing us how to stick it to the man before we even knew who "the man" was.

The plot centered on the holiday struggles of the Simpson family—middle class, just like most of us. They relied on the classic financial strategy of saving up cash in a giant glass pickle jar to fuel the annual ritual of worshiping at the altar of commercialism on Jesus' birthday. You know, like any sensible family. But, in a twist that only Bart could pull off, he decided to get a tattoo. And, of course, Marge, the level-headed matriarch, had to drain the entire jar to get it laser removed.

Luckily for Marge, Homer still had his Christmas bonus to save the day—except, plot twist, he didn’t. Turns out, Mr. Burns decided to cancel that festive perk, leaving Homer scrambling to save their so-called "Best Christmas Ever." His solution? A part-time gig as a mall Santa, because nothing oozes "holiday spirit" like an underpaid dad in a rented beard. But after taxes, union dues, and whatever mysterious fees they slap on fake Santas, Homer walks away with a grand total of about thirteen bucks and some change. Naturally, the next logical step is to head straight to the dog track, hoping to turn that into a holiday jackpot. Spoiler alert: he doesn’t. Instead of cash, the family ends up with a scrappy, loveable greyhound named Santa’s Little Helper.

The structure is simple and linear, setting the tone for future episodes. Homer is portrayed as well-meaning but deeply flawed, overwhelmed by the weight of being the family’s breadwinner; but he hasn’t yet fully devolved into the bumbling fool we’d later know him as. Marge is competent and loving, the glue holding the family together. Lisa is already wise beyond her years, but still very much a kid. And Maggie? Well, she's just doing baby things, like sucking on her pacifier and occasionally making you wonder if she knows more than she lets on.

Ned Flanders makes his first appearance too, though he’s a much milder version of the religious zealot he’ll evolve into. Only one of his kids shows up—Rod or Todd, who knows? But Ned’s just the annoyingly perfect neighbor Homer struggles to keep up with, not yet the hyper-holy thorn in his side. And it works. Patty and Selma are also here in all their cynical glory, questioning, as they always will, why Marge chose Homer over literally any other man on the planet. 

The humor in this episode is gentler than what The Simpsons would later become known for, leaning on situational comedy to tell the story. The satire is toned down, but it does manage to poke fun at the rampant commercialism of Christmas. It’s simple yet elegant, reminding us that Christmas isn’t really about maxing out your credit cards—it’s about family and togetherness. And it manages to deliver that message without drowning in the sugary sentimentality that is seen on most holiday specials.

Homer’s journey from despair to redemption works because it’s relatable. There’s no magical windfall, no unexpected Christmas miracle. Instead, Homer just ends up with a dog no one wanted, and somehow, that brings the family joy. It’s the perfect mix of grounded realism and heartwarming charm. While it may not be the flashiest or most sophisticated episode in Simpsons history, it’s undeniably crucial in shaping the show’s identity and securing its place among holiday TV classics.

Four out of five squeaky porkchop dog toys

[sylles-sylles]

If you thought I was really going to quit my career, let me tell you you fell into my fools day prank (that day was fools day for Mexico).

Well, here's my 2023 summary of art!! I also made the template inspired by a calendar, using this template from 2022 as a base: https://www.deviantart.com/electricmorningstar/art/2022-Summary-of-Art-meme-template-929805644

2023 has been a year full of great experiences and achievements. Yeah, I haven't posted a lot this year because I had some problems but there were many great things I've done and achieved: I won in art contests, my self-esteem improved, I graduated high school, I visited new cities, I slimmed down a bit and gained some muscle, I became more skilled in the college admission exam (I hope I get admitted for the next semester), I got a new job, I participated in a christmas play, I became more able to draw, my mental health improved a bit and I turned 20.

This year is definitely better than 2022 and well, I hope 2024 ends up being much better.

Thanks to my family, my online friends, my irl friends, my teachers, my therapist and all of you for helping me make this year great.

Plans for 2024:

- I wanna get more time to do some activities like drawing and working out

- I want to reach a normal body fat percentage

- I want to make art with the techniques I've learned from the high school's art class

- I want to get back to work on my projects scripts and ideas.

I hope you receive 2024 with a lot of happiness!!

••••••

🚫Notice: please, do not trace, re-upload. edit or use in your videos without crediting me. Please, do not use this picture in icon or banner without my permission. Only I can use this without crediting.

Agree with the notice!!

⚠️ If you don’t like this, don’t comment with insults, please, just comment respectfully what you dislike about this picture. You can also give me constructive criticism.

[rainydaysandhappydays]

Basic creepypasta headcannons

(A/N: I am still new to the cp sphere. So feel free to drop by and tell me some things I don't know. I'll be happy to see what the community thinks!)

(2nd A/N: I know I'm spelling Maskey's name "wrong" but I've spelt it that way for years when I first heard about CPs when I was a kid. I'm not changing it now. So from now on Maskey has an e in his name.)

Basic Appearance

SlenderMan is 14'9" (~454 cm) and looks to be what can equate a real life stick figure. Just pull a normal stick figure out like taffy and you'll get Slender. He does actually have a mouth but he always has it hidden. For the simple fact that it's 1 terrifying as FUCK. And 2 because it actually kinda hurts a little having it open. As he has to tear open his face skin to open his mouth at all. And even worse is that his mouth is the size of, like, half his head. He could easily chomp a small child in half with how large his mouth is.

Laughing Jack is 9'6" (~292 cm) and is lanky af, but not nearly as much so as Slender. His arms are ridiculously long. And his nails are several inches long as well. (Think Edward Scissor Finger type hands) So if he stood completely upright with his arms by his sides, he would be nearly touching the floor with his nails. That's how long he is. (Don't worry tho. He can easily cut them to be a far more manageable length. They just grow ridiculously quickly so he will have to keep an eye on that if he ever gets into any sort of relationship where he's not harming the other.)

Eyeless Jack is 7'5" (228 cm) and is Large. Like buff, wide, and thiccc. Boi looks like he could body a car and win. Though he hides most of it under his baggy af clothes and his surprisingly bad posture.

Brian/Hoodie is 6'3". (192 cm) Compared to Tim he is on the thinner side, but still has plenty of muscles. He may seem a bit lanky at first but don't let his baggy hoodie fool you. He can still deck the halls better than any Christmas song. If you ever manage to see him without his iconic hoodie on, be prepared to see his fantastically sculpted arms. They aren't super thick or beefy, but they are dense and hard. With a few veins along them.

Tim/Maskey is 6'0", (182 cm) DILF. Straight out. Has a small belly, but it looks tasteful on his bodytype. He looks like he could pick up damn near anyone for one of the best hugs ever. Too bad he's too much of an ass to use that blessing often.

Puppeteer is also 6'0". (182 cm) He honestly looks similar to those nerds in movies. Not the ones with brick thick glasses, but the ones that look frail and thin with an odd hunch in thier backs. Yeah, he's like that. Though in what can be considered a compromise for his weak looking built, he is ridiculously flexible. He doesn't use the ability all that often, be he could rival some contortions out there.

Toby is 5'11" (181 cm) and almost looks smaller than he is. If you saw him at a distance you would probably think he was just a regular kid running about. But as soon as you see him up close he looks like a full grown German Shepard. Big, tough, and ready to snap someone in half if deemed necessary. He acts like one too, with his constant need for attention, affection, and touch. He really is a hell of a puppy.

Helen/Bloody Painter is 5'10". (180 cm) The only reason why he's so tall is because his body just wouldn't stop growing when he was a teen. The rest of him is thin and gangly. He looks to be slightly malnourished and has intense bags under his eyes. Looks damn near ready to die at any moment in time. Especially since he is naturally very stoic. (Don't let that fool you into thinking he doesn't have the emotions he just shows them in extremely subtle ways that you have to learn to understand at all.)

Jeff is 5'9" (179 cm) with the body of a swimmer. Which is odd because he doesn't swim all that often. But he does run a hell of a lot and swing his knife around even more. So he has long and hard muscles coating his entire body. He is constantly bragging that he looks better and more durable than some of the other creeps.

Basic world

The proxies can only read the minds of people that also have the mark of SlenderMan on them. Maskey's mark is on the back of the neck near the base of his skull. Hoodie's mark is on his sternum near his diaphragm. The solar plexus area. Toby's is on his spine on his lower back. Kate's is in the space between her collar bones. The mark is mostly small enough that it's not immediately noticeable, but it is still very much there and can never be hidden or removed. Like with makeup or tattoo removal surgery or anything like that. The marks are permanent. Even after death.

When Hoodie fell out of the window, he didn't actually die. He got so close that he could feel his heart beat it's last few beats before he came back. Not fully as an undead but more of someone that didn't die when they were supposed to. Sort of like those stories of people being recursitated after an extremely traumatic experience. However that gave him extreme trauma over death and the feeling of dying. He will do whatever it takes to never feel that experience again. He has night terrors about it sometimes and the only one that is ever able to calm him down after one is Maskey/Tim.

The story I'm using for EJ is that he was pulled into the cult when he was in collage and unfortunately was thought to be "the chosen one" bc he was really good at p much everything he tried. So all of his friends he made betrayed him and tied him down to an alter. Proceeded to scoop out his eyes with a burning rod, and then tear his torso open to eat his organs. And that's why his eyes now after his transformation are always leaking a hot viscous black fluid. It's the forever remains of his original eyes. Also why he can only eat human organs and nothing else. Another harsh reminder of what he went through. He was only 23 at the time.

[han-shinsuke]

🇳 🇦 🇴 🇾 🇦 🇿 🇪 🇳 🇮 🇳 ANGST

•life starts here•

He might have heard of it for him to do such reckless decision of acquiring me under the Zenin household. Mom had brought him with her in our home–I find his behaviour unusual for his age—well, I am not that old to speak this way but, Naoya Zenin IS really odd. How come a boy like him, who has everything that I always dream of, seems unhappy of his possessions and privileges and his eyes—whenever I lay attention on those, I see someone really different from the boy standing before mine. Does the life he has right now suffocates him?

“I can give you a life far better from what you have right now. All you have to do is to marry me.”

I see. He sees his way out through me.

Might as well use him as a path and tool towards security.

Fifteenth of September, I married Naoya Zenin.

•••••

“Ears on me, Nao.” Mom would definitely scold me if she finds out that I, a nobody, is going to lecture the boy who holds so much power and authority in his hands, “what’s so funny ha? Stop smirking.”

“You. I find your tantrums ridiculous.”

Is it possible to feel this kind of bloodlust for a boy? Can I kill him this instant? Uh, no. That would make me a criminal and most certainly, my body will not leave this house intact. Head for every life someone would take.

“May I remind you, I agreed to marry you three years ago but we both promised not to engage ourselves in any bedroom activities, right?” Naoya was only eighteen back then while I was already in my twenties. I don’t prey on children and will never not even if he’s already an adult.

I’m on my last year in college and one more year and we will give each other the freedom we always wanted.

“Can’t I use you according to my terms and needs?” He still has the annoying grin he had two hours ago.

Naoya Zenin, you really made my blood boiled. “You just did, Nao. You kissed me in front of my friends!” How can a man lie about his incapabilities to please a woman? I feel goosebumps all over my body! I can still feel his lips on mine!

“It was just a kiss, Y/N. It does not grow feelings, doesn’t it?” There was something in his eyes that makes me wanna doubt my incoming response.

“Of course. It was just a mere kiss.” I don’t kiss then fall in love.

Liar. The devil in me contradicted.

•••••

Responsibility is what makes a man, a man. And a bloke’s ability to fulfill the onus that have given to him is what makes a man deserving of power bestowed upon him.

But, whaf if, once upon a man’s life, all he had ever dreamt of was to have a normal life like the others?

Would it make him a bad man to desire life according to his preferences?

Would it make a man, not a man at all, if he chooses who he really wanted to be?

To choose. To live. To be accountable for the mistake he would make.

Freedom is all he ever wanted.

Once in his life, Naoya Zenin feels the sense of belongingness under her care.

••••

“You look bad.” What’s new? I always look terrible. Been in a fight—almost a cat fight with Naoya’s ex-fianceé, Shei. I roll my eyes at him when he took a photo of me.

“How can you stomach this face, Nao?” I catch a glimpse of my snap in his phone and it makes me wanna vomit. “I’m an ugly shit.” Messy hair and few scratches on my face. Kill me now.

Shall I apologize to him? I have gone feral on his supposed to be wife. Well, he can’t blame me for fighting back. Shei, had hit a nerve.

“I’m sorry. I slapped her.”

“What were you sorry for?”

His hand ascends in the air. I closed my eyes when I thought he would hit me, too, in exchange of the pain I inflicted in his girl.

“You’re really warm, Y/N.”

That day, the wind blown north.

And there was his captivating smile.

••••

“You would never find a man who will love you.”

“I regret having you as my daughter.”

“You won’t make it. You’re weak. You are a fool for believing in miracles.”

“I just want you gone in my life.”

Dad, do you still believe I will not make it?

Do you still want me gone?

Dad, he’s the miracle dressed in a villain’s coat.

Do you still not believe it?

One day, I will be home to tell you all about it.

•••••

“You’re just a tool for him, bitch! And once he gets his freedom, you’ll be dispensable!”

“He would throw you out just like what your father had done to you!”

Winter is approaching. And guess what?

I just landed a killer slap on someone's face out of fury.

••••

“I married him for his money.” The woman sitting adjacent to me will not believe me if I say that we married each other for love.

Mrs. Zenin slides a blank cheque to me and says, “name your price.”

“I sold my words and my loyalty to your son, Madame. You cannot buy a devil twice.”

On this day and forward, I solemnly swear I will get him out.

“My son has big responsibilities to this family.”

“And so is he to himself.”

Naoya deserves freedom.

•••••

Can I last a day in the Zenin household?

Good news, I have been living with them for almost four years now.

“Do you miss your brother?” Suddenly, he asks. I turn to him and rest my eyes under his bed.

We don’t sleep on the same bed. I’m comfortable lying on the floor.

“No.” I lied.

He’s with me wherever I go.

At this time, he was under his bed. Smiling back at me.

I cannot let go of him.

After all these years, my brother’s ghost is still haunting me.

He died under my bed.

••••

“I saved your fund from the robbers.”

He was young. He was full of life.

He was innocent. He had dreams.

On the day of Christmas Eve, robbers had invaded our home. No one was there aside from my thirteen years old brother.

My parents got into a fight so they left home.

I got tired of their shits so I left home, too.

“I fought for these. Are you proud of me, ate?” I found my brother covered in blood. Hiding under my bed. Protecting my stupid piggy bank.

My brother was a hero.

He protected my dreams.

And that caused him, his life.

•••••

“Had you dated a man before?”

“Never. Men are scared of me.”

I check his tie and it perfectly clings around his neck. We have our graduation pictorial today so I volunteer assisting him in his clothes.

“Am I scared of you?” He holds my chin and moves my head up and down then left and right. I give him a soft blow on his stomach and that makes him laugh.

“Why are we having this conversation, Nao?” The contract is nearing its end. Naoya Zenin will be free in three months.

I get him to stay. I get him to choose. I get him to be accountable for every consequences of his actions and decisions.

“Can we be friends after our divorce?” Can we? Can I be just a friend for the man I want to keep for as long as I could?

“Thank you, Naoya.”

“For what?” He checks himself in the mirror and smiles.

“For saving me from becoming a total mess.”

Fifteenth of September, I almost sold my dignity in exchange of money.

Fifteenth of September, Naoya Zenin came.

•••••

On our graduation day, just when I’m about to receive my diploma alone on the stage, my father came with flowers in his hand. Even though he was struggling to walk using his prosthetic leg, my father march with me.

It was not the diploma that made me cried a river on our way down but the words I longed for him to say,

“I’m sorry for not being a good father to you.”

And oh, I also found out that she’s living with my mom again.

•••••

“I’m returning every penny he has spent on me, Madame.” I did not mean to boast but I save enough to pay back Naoya’s generosity.

“Does he know?” Mrs. Zenin picks up the cheque and plays with it.

“Yes, Madame.” Naoya knows I work part time up until now.

“May I ask you, how do you envision Naoya Zenin without his family?”

“A man who don’t value his roots is nothing. There would be no Naoya Zenin without his family, Madame. Please, do not abandon your son just because he sees life differently from yours.”

••••••

—five years later—

“Y/N, can you assist the new guests?”

I stop checking the inventory report in the computer and immediately come to aid my best friend who is also my co-owner of the small coffee shop we established five years ago. I wear the black apron and pick two menu card from the counter.

“Good day! Welcome to Carri—”

“Y/N...”

“Mrs. Zenin!” I almost dropped the menu card on the floor but the man who has his back against my direction caught them on time.

“Hello, wife!” Naoya flashes his captivating smile and gives back the menu card, “can I take you home after your duty?”

“Wa—wife? I am no longer your wife, Nao.”

Mrs. Zenin clears her throat and put an envelope on the table, “he didn’t signed the papers so technically, you are still his wife, Y/N. And please, just call me ‘mama’, I kinda feel old when you uses formalities on me.”

“I found you again, Y/N.”

First snowfall, Naoya Zenin finds his way back to me.

•life never ends here•

THANK YOU FOR READING 😊😊❤️❤️

icon artist’s profile: https://pin.it/1TnFoH6

[dear-yandere]

—ask collection!

a collection of mostly very old chats and sweet asks that i never got around to answering! thanks for the patience and love!! 

beware, fairly long post... woops....

chat asks.

darling: Eu-jin is best boy. Change my mind.

vanya: i am physically incapable of fulfilling that request, how dare you do that to me... i’m biased since he’s my own oc, but i would die for my (very best) boy eu-jin... who can resist such a gentle yandere that loves you so whole-heartedly?

that reminds me! he’s actually based off of kuroyuki and gekkamaru from the otome nightshade, so if you want similar characters by any chance, do check them and the game out ♡

darling: I was watching the dub for Part 5 of JoJo's Bizarre adventure yesterday...Mista called himself Daddy and I like- sdfghjfgsdhnhnmj!! My heart can't take this--

vanya: WAIT HE DID???? i’m not even big on daddy kink and reading that made me go 😳 this is vital information to know... what episode was this??? for research purposes, of course. gotta perfect my yan! mista, after all~...

darling: for yandere songs, have you heard of the major to minor covers by chase holfelder :O? the way he delivers the lyrics in some songs (betty, all i want for christmas), added with the key changes to minor, is really fantastic, and gives a stalker-ish vibe imo! and he's a really good singer in general

vanya: i have!! a good chunk of them are actually on my personal yandere playlist, so i end up hearing them frequently when i’m writing!! i haven’t been keeping up with his uploads recently, so ‘betty’ is completely new to me and just, wow???????????? this man is an absolute god send for us “romantic” horror fans... ♡

this ask gave me such a lovely idea, though, darling: assigning yandere types/mbti based off each of chase’s minor key covers. i think i’ll do that just for you. ♡

darling @blossomiich​: I reread some of your old character interaction asks and saw the one with Jotaro hugging his Darling after a panic attack and the elephant seal plush reminded me of the iconic C H O N K Y ringed seal plushie that was kinda trending and I can totally imagine Jotaro having one of those >w< that's so adorable!

vanya: i honestly don’t remember that interaction, but then again i don’t remember most things hmghng so i looked it up and

j...just imagine star plat hogging it and not letting joot cuddle with it 🥺 the duality of man...thank you for this cute image...

darling: Umm, sorry for asking this. I'm just curious because of your bio language in your header. Are you Chinese too, perhaps?

vanya: no worries!! i’m mixed guyanese (indian, chinese, & possibly black and/or portuguese), but my family only celebrates (or rather, acknowledges?) our indian descent, since the majority of our family is predominantly east indian. 

my header is actually a quote from a danmei novel (and one of my all-time favorite fandoms), tiān guān cì fú (heaven’s official blessing)!

darling genki stan anon: Omg you're writing for free now, i didn't expect that one lol. It's a cute show innit? Not a nagi stan but I feel like nagisa has that kinda unsnapped personality that would make him peak delusional yandere material lolol like oikawa but less threatening and without his head being up his own ass 😂. Hope you're doing well!! -gsa

Gdjsjs im such a fool, i think my last ask said something about not thinking you'd write for free when i literally just pointed out kisumi on your sideblog LMAO my bad 😅 😂 also ill hold back on the gen chan requests because ive already asked so many in the past! Thank you though 🥺. Also feel free not to post this, it can just dip into my onesided chats with my lil flower 💐 so long as you receive them im fine 😌 -genki stan anon

vanya: nagisa isn’t my favorite (kisumi is), but gods if he wouldn’t make a great yandere. honestly, out of the iwatobi boys, nagi is probably the most unhinged. i wouldn’t peg him as delusional, at least not at first; i think he’s very lucid and knows exactly what he wants and how to manipulate people in order to get it!!! kisumi is fairly similar now that i think about it... i might... have a type...

please feel free to send in gen-chan requests whenever you want!!!! i’m kinda super asocial, so it’ll take me a while to answer, but i love getting asks from you since you’re so sweet and excitable!!! your little flower reads and cherishes them all!! 🥺

also darling genki stan anon: Sorry for spamming you with asks hdjkdks, u dont even need to reply im just kinda brain empty venting here whether you recieve them or not 😂 i just needed to confess that while yes i am #1 gen simp, and he is undoubtedly my fave oc of yours but that Ilya tentacle smut had me very much so highkey kinda 👀, had to re read the genki oral style drabble to bring my head back. He dont even need to worry about luca bc that man a thot. I think therin is a thot too but like lowkey, a classy thót -gsa

vanya: omg i’ve kept this one for forever mnmghngh i might’ve even answered at some other point, now that i think about it... but i just 🥺 gosh i hope i find my muse soon, because i really wanna write you a genki fic 🥺 hhhh

the ilya tentacle smut was so in character for that boy... i have no clue how to write monsters, much less tentacles, but i’d honestly do anything for him 🙏 kinky russian boy...

therin is definitely a classy thot, the kind that only bangs the finest concubines then turns around and slut shames you for banging the very same prostitutes gbfmngnfg rules don’t apply to him, in his kingdom...wish that were me tbh ✊😔

sweet asks.

darling one: i've read almost all of your dazai and chuuya fics and i love them so much!! your formatting is also super aesthetic just a question, i saw on your kofi that you also draw so i was wondering if you drew all the header arts?? bc they're all super pretty :) have a great day!

darling two: Just wanted to say love the writing and the way your format your posts is so aesthetically pleasing. One day I hope my posts looks half as good as yours because I legit can't get over how pretty and organized it looks.

vanya: omg thank you so much!!!! one of my bffs, yue, is to thank for the formatting and aesthetic choices, really! if you wanna see more of her aesthetic formats and posts, she actually runs a few blogs! you may know her as @milkscafe​, formally @milkaaton! i adore her and her aes choices so much 🥺

as for the headers, i don’t draw 99.98% of them! i have drawn a couple, but they’re so few and far in between since i almost never finish my art wips haha... my older posts are lacking proper credits because i’m an absolute idiot, but i’m slowly working my way backwards to credit them all where possible! they’re all indeed super pretty!!!

have a great day yourself, my love!!

darling: THEY’RE NOT BAD CONTENT, I LOVE THEM ALL

vanya: this was in response to a now-deleted lil blurb but i kept it in my inbox because i wanted to say i love u very much and seeing this ask each time i open my inbox makes my heart skip a beat ♡

darling: Listen I love your writing, you inspired me to start it myself! I've always loved to write, and read of course but your style and concepts just stick with me. If you where to write something besides Yandere content/fandom content and started your own series? I would read the shit, out of it. I'm always nervous to interact with my favorite writers because you know, I'm afraid of the impression I'd leave but I just wanted to say this anyway! 💞💞💞🔫😳

vanya: wowowow fgfnmgnfmngfg that’s such a high compliment my brain just gmfnbgmnf go boom fogjfngnfg and thank you for the interaction, us writers truly appreciate it no matter how awkward or nervous you think you may be / come off!!!

darling one: As a writer, your post struck a nerve with me. I don’t send feedback to writers I like nearly as much as I should (and certainly not as much as I’d like in return as a writer). So, as such, I’m going to start doing that when I can, starting with you.

You are an incredible writer. You were one of the first yandere writing blogs I found and you’re still one I check in on regularly to see what you have been working on. You can portray a sense of suspense and intrigue in a natural way that many other writers - published ones included - struggle with. You delve into the darkness without it feeling forced, and you have an amazing grasp on the psyches of the characters you write for (which is a quality I adore in writing and strive toward myself).

I’m not great at ending these things so I guess.. you keep doing you? Because the you is great and I appreciate it.

darling two:  hey. i'm here to tell you that from the bottom of my heart i love you and your writings. i really admire your writing skills. you inspire me. one of your posts once saved me from a nervous breakdown. thank you for everything you do. you're a wonderful person. good luck!

darling three: I wanted to tell you that thank you for writing such wonderful beautiful writings and that you take time to edit and write I hope you are taking care of yourself 💖❤

darling four: Thanks. I was having a hard time and deleted all my apps, but as soon as i opened my phone my first instinct was to look at your blog and i got my motivation back. Thanks (:

darling five: Hi ! I just wanted to say I really enjoy the stories you write and how they are detailed so well ! Stay safe and I hope you have a good day/night ! ლ(╹◡╹ლ)

vanya: ahhhh, these are very old asks mostly dating back to my “tumblr writing community is dying” post, and i’ve kept them this entire time because i’m just so starstruck. i have no clue how to reply to compliments, so i’m not sure what else to say besides that these asks made me very happy and got me through a few insecure moments!!! i’ve actually been feeling a little down about my writing recently, mostly because of lack of motivation / inspiration, so revisiting these really warmed my heart, so thank you truly ♡ i’m certainly keeping the originals in my inbox until the end of time!!

darling @monstrously-obsessed: psst, this local cryptic mom thing send all of their love for you 💕

vanya: your local herbo says she loves you very much momster 🥺 mwah

also, to the anon worried about my safety:

thank you so much for pointing that out!!! it hadn’t even crossed my mind when i made those ocs, so i appreciate your concern! i was contemplating revamping those two as is, so this is a great place to start! thank you again!!

[songtoyou]

Chapter One: Move You

Would You Call That Love

Pairing: Chris Evans x Raina Morrison (OC) Rating: PG-13 (Will be 18+ for some chapters)

Description: There was always one person Chris Evans tended to turn to when he was not in a committed relationship, Raina Morrison. He could confide in her about things going on in his life that he did not feel comfortable talking to his family or close friends about. Chris and Raina were able to establish a way to communicate with one another openly but also being respectful of the other’s time and needs. It was the only constant “relationship” he had, but without all the nonsense of trying to build a life together. A “friends with benefits” situation.However, what happens when Chris starts rethinking his “relationship” with Raina and if either is willing to pursue something more?

Chapter Rating: PG

Warnings: Mention of anxiety

Word Count: 2,530

Note: This is the first fic I have written in ages. Everything about it is fiction. Sadly, I do not know Chris Evans and this is just a fictional take on his life. I do not permit this fic to be reposted on other platforms.  

Thank you to @southerngracela​ and @sullyosully for the support. I also want to give a shout out to @royallyprincesslilly​​ for the text divider. 

*Updated for grammar edits.

June 2019

The early morning sun was peeking out of the sky, and the air became crisper after a night of pouring rain. It was supposed to be a scorcher day in June, according to the weather reports. That was not something Chris Evans was looking forward to since he would have to be on-set partaking in outdoor scenes wearing sweaters, business suits, and heavy coats for most of the day. Despite the uncomfortableness his job could be at times; it was all worth it in the end. Acting was Chris’s passion, and he was fortunate to do it for a living. Chris knew he was lucky to be where he is at in his career. From the ups and downs to disappointing film projects that either went nowhere or were rejected by critics and moviegoers, it all helped steer Chris to become the actor he is today. 

With Captain America’s story arch now complete, Chris understood that it would take a while for audiences and some of his fans not just to see him as Steve Rogers. Taken on Marvel’s top Avenger’s mantle was one of the best decisions he ever made as it took his career to new heights. Yes, Chris had some reservations at first when he was approached for the role. He did not feel confident enough if he could handle the responsibility of playing such an iconic character. Chris was also worried about losing his anonymity. He liked being able to walk down the street with no one recognizing him or asking for a photo and autograph. Now Chris was lucky to make it a few blocks without someone yelling out at him or screaming “Captain America!”, it most definitely did not help ease his anxieties. 

“You got that Marvel money saved up. You can live comfortably while pursuing projects that people would not expect you to take. It’s a win-win situation for you,” said Raina, one of Chris’s best friends, when mentioning the project, Defending Jacob. 

“You sound like my mom when you say that,” Chris replied.

Raina laughed at that and said, “I take that as a compliment, you know.”

“Good. I meant it as one. You both don’t take shit from anyone. And I know you’ll always have my back as she does.” 

Raina and his mom kept telling him to accept the lead role as Andy Barber in Defending Jacob. And how it would not only be beneficial to his career, but also because 1.) the show was filming in Massachusetts so that he would be in his own home every night, and 2.) it was a role he never played before: a father.

Sipping his coffee, Chris stood on the porch of his house as he watched Dodger relieve himself. “Come on, buddy. Let’s get you some breakfast,” Chris waved Dodger over to get inside. The pup was happy to oblige his owner and trotted up the steps into the house.

Chris heard his cellphone buzz just as he put down Dodger’s food bowl. Reaching over the counter to retrieve it, Chris smiled when he saw the name pop up.

Raina: Why didn’t anyone tell me that New York is always hot as balls! I can’t take it!

Chris: I warned you about that, but you didn’t listen to me. What are you doing up so early?

Raina: Couldn’t sleep. Nervous about the preview shows for Moulin Rouge. It is coming up quickly. 

Chris: Again, congrats on Moulin Rouge. You got nothing to be nervous about; you are going to be great. 

Raina: I’m just worried if people will like the show. 

Chris: You and the crew wouldn’t have gotten to Broadway if people weren’t interested in seeing it, especially with you as Satine. This is what you were born to do. Scott, Ma, and I will be there on opening night. Carly and Shanna won’t be able to come but plan to see the show on a girls’ trip to New York later in the summer. I know both are proud of you as well. 

Raina: Stop! You are going to make me cry. All of you are so sweet. Seriously, I am forever grateful to you and your amazing family for supporting me all these years.

Chris: Can you believe it has been ten years since we met at that Vanity Fair photoshoot for West Side Story. 

Raina: Oh God! Do not remind of that shoot. I was a ball of nerves that day.

Chris: I thought the paramedics were going to need to be called for you.

Raina: Haha. Seriously though, they probably would have if you didn’t help calm me down.

 January 2009

“Wait, what is this photoshoot about?” Raina asked her manager, Jerry, who sighed in response.

“Raina, I’ve already told you. It is to celebrate the Broadway revival of West Side Story. The photographer is re-creating scenes from the film version,” explained Jerry.

Now it was Raina’s turn to let out a sigh. Despite being in the music industry since she was 16 years old, the whole idea of photoshoots still did not make her comfortable. Plus, the long hours, the bright lights, and the shoots’ craziness left Raina feeling drained. It was now adding other celebrities to the mix brought on a whole new set of anxieties.

“You don’t have anything to worry about,” Jerry assured Raina and added, “Today’s going to be easy. You don’t have to worry about being front and center this time. You’ll be in the background so that you can relax.”

“If you say so,” Raina retorted with a small smile. She trusted Jerry.

When Raina finally arrived at the photoshoot, she was whisked away to hair and makeup and then onward to change her costume. She had already been introduced to her fellow photo mates, such as Ashley Tisdale and Robert Pattinson. Both were very pleasant and nice. 

“I am such a huge fan. I have all of your albums,” Ashley gushed admirably. 

“Thank you. That is very sweet of you to say. I loved your album ‘Headstrong,’ by the way. Such great bops,” Raina complimented, and Ashley’s face lit up like a Christmas tree.

As the two made their way to the set, each shared what project they were currently working on until Ashley stopped dead in her tracks.

“What is it?” Raina asked, concerned.

“Chris Evans,” whispered Ashley and went on, “Chris Evans is over there.”

“Yeah, didn’t you know he’d be here? Oh my God, you guys didn’t use to date, did you?”

“Ha! I wish. He is just so cute,” Ashley said dreamily.

Raina just laughed and shook her head, “Yeah, he isn’t bad looking.”

They filmed the dance scene from the movie where Maria and Tony see each other for the first time. Camilla Belle and Ben Barnes were assigned the lead roles for the shoot. Raina had to admit; both looked the part. The photographer, Mark Seliger, gathered everyone around to discuss how the scene would go. He started placing people in their spots with Jennifer Lopez and Rodrigo Santoro in their positions as lead Shark dancers Anita and Bernardo, with Camilla and Ben on their respective sides. Ashley was assigned as a Jet girl dancing with Chris’s character, the Jets leader, Riff. 

Raina hid her smile when Ashley shook Chris’s hand and introduced herself. Poor thing looked as if she could faint. Settled in the back, Raina was one of the Sharks. She was perfectly content where she was at standing next to Minka Kelly and Jay Hernandez. The three would even make little side chat here and there. 

Overall, the photoshoot was going well. Until the bright lights, the loud music, and the uncomfortable costume started getting to Raina. She felt like she was going to pass out.  However, Raina was determined to pull through in fear of being labeled a “diva” or, worse, “difficult” to work with; that was not the kind of press she needed now. Remembering what her mother told her to do when the first signs of an anxiety attack were coming on was to breathe in and out. She did that a couple of times as she closed her eyes when Mark said they were changing film and wanted a couple more shots. 

Unsurprisingly, someone else was beginning to get restless during the shoot as well. Chris was not a fan of photoshoots. He always felt awkward and never understood what he was supposed to be doing. He would continuously worry if he were coming off stupid or looking like a fool. 

Chris was more cautious of the types of photoshoots he would take part in and made sure to steer clear of the ones wanting him to be viewed as eye-candy merely. He was working hard to make a trajectory in his career from heartthrob to serious actor. However, Chris knew he had more to prove to audiences and critics for them to see past his ‘Not Another Teen Movie’ or ‘Fantastic 4’ roles. 

Nevertheless, when he got word about Vanity Fair’s West Side Story photoshoot, Chris was immediately on board. He was a theater kid, after all, thanks to his mother. Similarly, with other shoots, it all starts the same. The photographer talks about the art direction of the shoot and expectations for the day.  

During the short breaks on set, Chris looked around to see the other actors and performers. While he knew some of the folks on set, he did not honestly know any of them personally. The only person he was more acquainted with was Camilla, and that was because both filmed the movie Push a year ago.

As Chris’s eyes roamed around the room, they landed on Raina, who was fanning herself with her hands. While others were making small talk, he noticed that Raina took deep breaths and her eyes were closed. She stepped down on the chair she was standing on to take a seat and put her head in her hands. 

Chris felt bad. He knew an anxiety attack when he saw one. Slowly making his way over to Raina, he kneeled in front of her.

“Hey, are you okay?” Chris asked in a whisper.

Raina jumped at the sound of his voice. She did not expect anyone to come up to check on how she was doing. She thought she was doing her best to be discreet.

“I don’t know. It’s too hot in here. The lights are hurting my eyes, and it’s hard to breathe,” Raina said, continuing to fan herself.

Instinctively, Chris reached out to hold one of Raina’s shaking hands to help calm her down. 

“Have you ever tried the 4-7-8 breathing technique?”

Raina shook her head no and said, “Never heard of that technique.”

“Trust me; it has helped me out a lot. Okay, so you’re going to breathe in for four seconds, hold it for seven seconds, and exhale for eight seconds. Do you want to try it with me? Breathe in 1, 2, 3, 4. Hold 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 and exhale 1, 2, 3, 4 ,5, 6, 7, 8. Very good. Let’s do it again,” Chris calmly instructed Raina.

“I’ll get you some water. Just keeping doing the breathing exercises, okay.”

When Chris returned, he again kneeled in front of Raina and handed her the water cup.

“Thank you,” said Raina as she sipped slowly.

“You’re welcome.”

Raina let out a little chuckle, “I can’t believe I had an anxiety attack. I told Jerry I was worried about this happening. Again, thank you. I appreciate you helping me out,” expressed Raina gratefully.

As Raina continued to sip her water, Chris took the time to look at her. She was attractive, and he could tell she was a little bit younger than him. While this was Chris’s first-time meeting Raina, he had seen her before at other Hollywood functions. Neither having their paths cross until now.

“Okay, folks, let’s get back in your positions!” Mark yelled to get everyone’s attention.

“You going to be okay?” asked Chris as he stood up.

“Yes. I’m going to be fine,” answered Raina, standing up as well.

Chris helped her back up on the chair, and he returned to his spot next to Ashley. It was weird. No one else seemed to notice what went on between the two. It was like for those few short moments, Chris and Raina were in their own world. 

Chris kept stealing glances towards Raina for the rest of the shoot. He kept telling himself it was to make sure she was okay, not that he was drawn to her or anything. 

‘Don’t go there, Evans. The last thing you need is to be in a relationship, and she doesn’t look like the type to do hookups,’ Chris scolded himself and added, ‘Most likely won’t ever see her again after this day.’

“I am glad that it didn’t take long for us to meet again after that day. We do have Scott and Shanna to thank for that, by the way,” Chris happily reminded Raina.

He decided to call her that morning after their text exchange. He preferred hearing her voice anyways. 

“Oh yeah, at my concert in Boston. It was fate. We were destined to be friends.”

“Yep. Even though you are a fan of the New York Mets and Giants fan, I still love ya,” teased Chris.

Raina groaned, “Let us not bring up sports, shall we. It can only get ugly from here. Anyways, I’ll let you go. I gotta start heading out for rehearsals. Talk to you later. Bye,” said Raina.

“Bye, sweetheart. Take care,” replied Chris and ended the call. 

He looked over at Dodger, who had finished eating and was now lying in one of his dog beds near the kitchen table. As Chris continued to sip his coffee, he decided to make breakfast and went to the fridge to take some eggs. Once he got everything ready to begin cooking, his mind drifted to Raina. Chris noticed that his mind had been doing that more recently lately. 

For Chris, his relationship with Raina was more than just a friendship. She was someone he could confide in about things he was not comfortable bringing up to his family or close childhood friends. Their friendship evolved when both began a “friends with benefits” type of relationship. This would only occur when both were not in committed relationships with other people. 

Surprisingly, this arrangement only managed to make them closer friends. The boundaries they agreed upon were put in place not to fracture their friendship. He went into the situation not wanting to build some domesticated life with Raina. However, at times, Chris kept thinking if he could turn his friendship with Raina into something more. Something more than friends, more than sex buddies, but as a life partner. A wife and mother to his children.

‘Stop lying to yourself,’ Chris’s inner voice spoke up, ‘You’re in love with Raina. Just admit it!’

Nevertheless, Chris could not admit to himself. He was not ready to deal with those feelings for one of his closest friends. 

Not yet, at least. 

[moretreasurewithinarchive]



Ella's mother calls her clever at least twice that I heard.

LITTLE ELLA HAS A LEGIT FULL SIZED CAROUSEL HORSE IN HER BEDROOM??? And with that, it looks like there was at least 1 puppet stage, what I can only assume to be a carousel music box but it's built like a Christmas Pyramid, a mobile, and a canopy bed.

The way she and her dad both say thank you this must have been very difficult for you when they get news the one they love is dying???

The Just So and Shall We lines repeat too.

The dress she's wearing when her father returns and when her mother's dying are the same, it just had fake flowers on it when he returns.

We see 3 different Ella's walking with her father toward the meadow. There's little Ella in Black after her mother dies, then what I assume is teenage Ella in a white or blue floral dress sand her hair work to the side and flowing over her shoulder, and then Lily.

Ella lets her shoes hand off her feet a lot

Her physical reaction to her father mentioning Lady Tremaine even before he says anything about marriage.

That butterfly comb will never NOT remind me of Rose's in Titanic.

I can't see anyone in that time period actually making their day Lucifer???

I hate Lady Tremaine's black hat when we first meet her.

The way Ella smiles and laughs for her father and then visibly deflates the instant he turns around KILLS me.

When the Tremaines arrive, Ella's mother's portrait is on the bookshelf in the study/parlor/whatever that room is where she died.

Drisella tells Anastasia their mother's lying about the house being charming and says it's just manners. Anastasia tells her to shut up.

The look Ella's father gives Anastasia when she says they never thought to decorate, and how he looks back at Ella.

Before he leaves on that last trip, Ella KNOWS he isn't well and she can tell something going to happen.

Why the fuck does Tremaine get so jealous of hearing about Ella's mother when she CLEARLY doesn't love her father?

The way Anastasia and Tremaine both look at Drisella after the complexion line kills me.

Like... Tremaine legit kept up a smile until the carriage pulled away and it was gone in less time than it took to blink.

The harp just sitting in the corner. Totally Ella's mother's. Js.

When Tremaine banishes her to the attic, it sounds like Ella was going to say something about staying in a smaller room?

By the time Ella and Tremaines talk in the study/parlor, all of her things, her father's things, and her mother's things are packed up and set aside, including the portrait of her mother. Suspicious much?

Anastasia and Drisella have toys. At first, we are Anastasia holding a doll and Drisella a rabbit, but they switch later.

Casual reminder that Ella's the youngest, since Anastasia calls her their little sister.

I want a full version of Lily singing Sing Sweet Nightingale and Lavender's Blue.

There are flower decorating and motifs all over this house. The walls. The clothes. Even in the stone wall in the kitchen.

Ella's look at Drisella while she's singing. And like... Tremaine herself tells her to shut up, but she gets mad at Ella for being like cringe.

Ella immediately knows as soon as she opens the door and see Farmer John.

Tremaine is a damn good actress though. Her eyes treating when they get the news.

THE BEEHIVES ARE SO CUTE.

That red bedroom of Tremaine's is so garish though.

Another casual reminder: ELLA NEVER GOT TO PROPERLY MOURN HER FATHER BECAUSE SHE WAS WORKING 24/7.

I imagine the scraps they gave her to eat lessened as time went on and they had less food and money. But she always shared them, no matter how meager.

Jacqueline is iconic.

A GIANT POT OF LAVENDER IS AT THE BOTTOM OF THE STAIRS TO THE ATTIC FROM THE KITCHEN.

Gods that robe of Tremaine's is AWFUL.

"Is there someone we've forgotten" They're dehumanizing her already. What a cunt.

Ella riding barebacked and workout reigns will never NOT impress me tbh.

Convince me the stag wasn't a test for both Ella and Kit from Fairy godmother.

Gods Richard was PERFECT in this role. And every time I hear his real accent I'm shook.

Kit's fucking whipped from the start.

Ella only calls him Kit. You can't tell me otherwise.

His sympathy when she says "They treat me as well as they're able". Tell me that this like doesn't ring in his head later and that's why he knows she's been stopped from coming to him.

RICHARD'S DIMPLES

IT'S KIT. KIT. I'M KIT. You absolute fucking disaster of a man 🤣🤣

And you know the Captain never lets him live that down.

Kit goes away a little and comes back when he says he hopes to see her again.

Ella's little lip bite.

Gods those blue and yellow split outfits on the palace staff are ATROCIOUS.

The banter with Kit and the King. And Kit and Ella in the secret garden.

MASTER PHINEAS.

Why are Kit's outfits so attractive?? 🥺

Kit and the king are so short compared to the Captain and the Grand Duke.

The Captain's laugh.

"That's very kind of you. To think of me." My poor baby.

THE LOOKS AFTER SHE CLAPS BACK IN FRENCH. SLAY.

Also, "I speak French not Italian".

Kit, honey you can say it's for the people all you want. You're not fooling anyone.

What the actual fuck does moonface even mean??

Ella making her dress in a day??? Damn girl.

I love Fairy godmother's beggar woman cloak???

Gods I HATE Lady Tremaine.

Ella's pink dress swear her mother's wedding dress like in the deleted song from the cartoon. And this is the hill I'll die on.

"Hairy dogfather" JFC.

I'd have liked the whole fairy godmother getup better without those dinky little wings tbh.

Ella not knowing what cantaloupe is.

MR. FUCKING GOOSE.

I'm sorry, but the lizard footmen creep me out. THEY DIDN'T NEED TO GIVE THEM THOSE TEETH LIKE WTF.

Ok but like... Would the greenhouse have been repaired at midnight though???

Honestly, Disney deprived us all of Lily being trapped in the pumpkin a la the Cinderella episode of Britannica's Tales Around the World with Pat Morita.

WHY TRANSFORM THE MICE. IT'S A FARM. THEY HAVE HORSES.

"I can't drive, I'm a goose" is my favorite line.

Unpopular opinion??? But I liked the ballgown better either without the butterflies or during the transformation when there was only those few blue ones.

I do like the gold butterflies in the slippers though.

I want to know how they got the crystals to stay in Lily and Helena's hair.

Sitting in a crinoline must be awful.

The palace is stunning.

I love every single one of the chandeliers in this movie.

The king waves at Chelina and Kit KNOWS.

The girl on the staircase next to the Tremaines when they get introduced laughs at them. And honestly, same.

"Someone I meet once TONIGHT".

For real, how did the guards at the stairs not hear Ella's name or that her footman was a lizard? They were like not even 5 feet away.

Ella playing with her skirt when she happy and scared.

KIT'S SMILE.

I wish we saw more of the purple in the ballgown.

I love that Ella's descent had Lavender's Blue and the dance has Once Upon A Dream in the score.

The Captain HAD to have told Kit that the Grand Duke already promised him to Chelina. And who gave him the right to do that anyway?

Kit's stammering.

Ella's gasp when he takes her waist and the way she looks at him is like the signature Lily shot. They did the same thing in War & Peace.

"They're all looking at you. Believe me they're all looking at YOU".

The one part in the dance where they kinda flap their arms up and down reminds me of a butterfly and idk why.

Dancing wearing a sword had to be tough. Especially when your partner's in a crinoline and a heavy ass dress. Props to Richard.

Lily tripping at one point during the dance.

Even Chelina loves Ella let's be real here.

Why is there so much telling people to shut up in this movie???

WE GOTTA FACE FACTS HERE, KIT AND ELLA ARE EVEN BETTER AND MORE LOVING PARENTS THAN THEIR OWN WERE.

I love the secret garden scene so much.

When Kit puts the shoe on her foot... Why is that like 😏😏. I hate feet. Why is that breathtakingly romantic??

Why do they always hesitate? GO AFTER HER IMMEDIATELY DAMN IT.

The crier's aids when he hits his head on the stairs.

Ella's interaction with the king.

Kit you're so slow. She's in glass heels and a crinoline and she still outran you.

DISNEY I WANT A DIRECTOR'S CUT OF THE FILM WITH ALL THE DELETED SCENES PUT BACK IN. I NEED KIT SAYING THE LADY ISN'T HERE TO DEFEND HERSELF.

They honestly don't see the footman using his coat tails to lower the portcullis??

Anastasia actually seemed pretty nice to Ella after the ball? Saying she looked cheerful and patting her arm? But then again, we really only see Tremaine and Drisella ripping the dress soooo?

ELLA YOU CAN'T KEEP A SECRET TO SAVE YOUR LIFE.

Girl you need a better hiding place than under the floorboards.

But like the music in the attic after the ball is so sweet???

KIT AND HIS FATHER. THANK YOU FOR LETTING HIM CRY AND SAY I LOVE YOU.

Also like... Notice that Tremaine's Just so to Ella's father was really patronizing and condescending. Ella's to Kit was insecure and uncertain. But the king's to Kit was proud.

At least Kit's not dumb. He's meet this girl multiple times. He don't need a shoe to tell him it's her.

WHY RIP THE ORIGAMI BUTTERFLY THOUGH.

Ella was full on ready to die in that attic to save Kit.

Why do all they guys' pants fit really well except Stellan's? His are loose and baggy.

Y'all know this girl is young and blonde wtf.

Also, fun fact. The girl that asks the Captain if she can try the other foot is Mimi Ndiweni. She played Fringilla in The Witcher on Netflix.

The Grand Duke turning away from the old lady, but the Captain letting her yet the slipper on anyway. 🥺

I want to know where in the line Kit was hiding.

Also how many takes they had to do of Sophie and Holliday trying the slipper on. Cause I wouldn't have been able to do it without laughing. Especially at Holliday's face.

Like... Even if the plan had gone down the way the Grand Duke and Tremaine wanted, I don't see him keeping his word to make her a counted and get good marriages for Anastasia and Drisella.

"YOU HAVE NEVER BEEN AND YOU NEVER WILL BE MY MOTHER".🗣️🗣️

Ella and Kit is my favorite score in the whole movie.

You know, the girls actually seen happy for Ella. Especially Anastasia. Her and Ella getting along better like in Dreams Come True is canon ok.

NEVER GONNA GET OVER KIT AND ELLA WEARING THEIR PARENTS' RINGS.

I love Ella's wedding gown.

Where did they get all those flowers in the winter though 😂

[feitanswife]

Consider:

Types of Christmas music from most to least valid:

GOD TIER NO QUESTIONS ASKED: just look up “Kelly clarkson silent night live” it’s a trio performance with a few of the greatest singers of all time and every time I hear it I SOB!!!!! IM TEARING UP JUST THINKING ABOUT IT ITS ONE OF THE MOST BEAUTIFUL THINGS IVE EVER HEARD

Most valid- jazzy brass band w/ one person singing in between looong music breaks. Makes you feel like you’re at a swanky holiday party

Very valid- the Kelly Clarkson Wrapped In Red album on the whole. No I will not be taking criticism on this getting its own tier. Her voice was just made for this stuff it’s my favorite album of hers full stop.

Solidly Valid- beach boys, lady Gaga’s “white Christmas” version with the added verse, jingle bell rock in general but tbh I like the original version most, every rendition of “last Christmas” ever done more or less(it’s a good song ok!) , the role reversal of “Baby it’s cold outside”, any metal or rock covers, romantic Christmas songs but made gay, songs about Santa driving things other than a sleigh (for example, a convertible)

i’d put Mariah Carey in this tier for the sheer iconic value of her voice, but tbh if it wasn’t so iconic I’d put it in the next tier down for being overplayed.

Kinda valid- non-christmassy Christmas songs by any artist: “frosty the snowman”, “winter wonderland”, any songs that are just like “yay it’s winter it’s snowing lets go frolic in the snow!” Theyre up in this tier for being universally relatable but not any higher cause there aren’t a lot of them and they get kinda boring after a while.

Also the religious songs that are performed by just one person (usually a lady but I’ve seen dudes do it well too) without any super intense background music just absolutely BELTING THE SHIT OUT OF IT like going back to Kelly again like I will be Christian for three minutes listening to her just go ham trying to bust the windows of the recording booth.

This is where I’d also put the other versions of “Baby it’s cold outside”, they’re good but not as good as the role reversal or any of the artists I’ve mentioned above. It’s actually a pretty difficult song to make Fantastic, it requires a very good blend of voices and the right amount of goofy self awareness,

and IMO it’s best done in that old school ‘jazzy’ way, it feels warmer and more authentic with the tempo and singing style. Modernized versions just don’t sound right to me.

Entirely neutral: religious Christmas songs done in the very beautiful classic choir style. That’s it basically if it sounds like I’m back in my high school’s winter dinner-and-a-show fundraiser thing and they’re doing the crazy harmonies and everything, then yeah I like. Good singing is good singing what can I say.

cursed: religious songs recorded in sub-par ways or by sub-par artists. This may be a simply written tier but don’t be fooled this accounts for 75% of the Christmas music out there.

Also Elvis I just don’t like his Christmas music idk his voice doesn’t suit it

[idasessions]

Famous Muses & Groupies in Rock Music Pt. 13

MUSE: Jane Asher

Jane was born on April 5th, 1946 in Willesden, England to a father who was a medical author and a mother who was a performing arts professor. Jane and her siblings, Peter and Claire, grew up as child performers in UK stage, film and TV programs. In between her acting jobs, Jane was educated at all-girls prep schools in London. Since age 5, Jane has had a lifelong, impressive career with popular films like The Masque of the Red Death (1964), Alfie (1966), The Buttercup Chain (1970), Deep End (1971), and Death at a Funeral (2007); as well as the mini-series “Brideshead Revisited” (1981). She portrayed Juliet in ‘Romeo & Juliet’ during a 1967 US repertory tour; and has published a handful of novels and cookbooks. Since 1971, Jane’s been with husband, animator Gerald Scarfe and has three children with him.

Now let me tell you a little story on how Jane lowkey became the most influential rock music muse of all time. On April 18th, 1963, Jane met the Beatles after a radio broadcast performance at Royal Albert Hall, where she appeared for a photo op for the zine Radio Times. Apparently when the band first saw Jane, all the members asked her out (I guess John and Ringo forgot they weren’t available, lol), but she had eyes for the cute one: Paul McCartney. The 17-year-old actress and 20-year-old music star hit it off right away and began dating instantly. By Christmas, Paul was living at Jane’s family’s house as her brother’s roommate until mid-1966, when Paul and Jane got their own house. Paul eventually proposed on December 4th, 1967. Supposedly back in the day, Beatle fangirls were most envious of Jane and Pattie Boyd (George’s first wife). Though most think of Pattie as the quintessential Beatle muse, about 50% of the songs she inspired were actually written after the band broke up. Jane on the other hand, quite possibly inspired more Beatles tunes than any other lady.

Although Paul and Jane looked like the perfect couple in magazines and news footage, the young pair were also a bit messy off camera. The two did indeed have a romantic courtship, but as is usually the case, things are ~different in relationships with musicians. By the time the sexual revolution was breaking through in 1965, Paul was a huge pothead, and was also experimenting with acid and coke by 1967. This didn’t really mesh well with Jane, who was rather straight-laced and didn’t care about trying drugs. In Marianne Faithfull’s 1994 memoir, Faithfull, the pop singer mentions going to a party at Paul & Jane’s house during the Summer of Love. She remembers Paul opening a kitchen window, and then Jane closing it, and the two passive-aggressively repeating the act throughout the night. There was also the issue of Paul being the most fangirled and lusted after dude in the British Invasion, and boy did he take full advantage of it with sidechicks like Maggie McGivern and Francie Schwartz.

Things seemed to be overall fine after Paul and Jane got engaged; and when Jane accompanied the Beatles and their wives on a famous trip to Rishikesh, India for a meditation retreat in spring 1968. But the legend goes that by summer of that same year, Jane returned home from a film shoot to find Paul and Francie in their bedroom together. Jane literally dumped him on the spot and drove away without second thought. While this is legit one of the crappiest ways for an engagement to end, Francie still wasn’t the sole reason Paul and Jane broke up. Besides everything else already covered in the previous paragraph, Paul was also hoping for a wife who would be willing to be a housewife fulltime. Jane was constantly insistent on keeping her career even if she started a family (you go, girl).

Now on to the most important impact of this Beatle union: the songs. Jane has a dozen timeless songs written about her, and the funny thing is, she really couldn’t care less, lol. She vowed to move on and never publicly speak about Paul after she left him and she’s kept her promise 50 years on. But the songs remain iconic and include

‘All My Loving’

‘And I Love Her’

‘Things We Said Today’

‘She’s a Woman’ [underrated]

‘Every Little Thing’

‘What You’re Doing’

‘Tell Me What You See’

‘We Can Work It Out’

‘You Won’t See Me’

‘I’m Looking Through You’

‘Here, There and Everywhere’  ← the magnum opus

‘For No One’ [omg, so good]

Jane inspired pop songs, love songs, break-up songs, slow songs, fast songs, etc. Even if she didn’t become Macca’s soulmate like a lovely Linda ultimately did, she arguably got the best songs out of him and can be forever secretly smug. But then again, is it really flattering to hear these tunes everywhere when they were written by an ex who was always getting high with his mates and fooling around with a bagillion groupies on the road? All I know is if I inspired a ballad like ‘Here, There and Everywhere,’ I would be bragging about that ‘til the day I die.

[benfeldman]

here comes the jackpot question in advance

summary: The one where Dan thought Phil hated him, so he hated Phil right back.

wc: 7.5k

tags: teenager au, new year’s eve, enemies to friends to lovers (in a way)

tws: underaged drinking, swearing (lots of it,,)

a/n: i wrote this lil diddy in the space between christmas and new year’s, aka when time doesnt feel real. my only betas were spellcheck and grammarly so sry if there are mistakes. im a sucker for enemies to lovers and teenager tropes,, what can i say.

read it on ao3 if that’s more your jam

Of all the places in the world, the last place he wants to be seen is McDonald’s. Dan’s exhausted from work and he just wants some chicken nuggets and an iced coffee, some comfort food to get him through the rest of the day. It’s super busy, so the possibility of him seeing someone from school is high, unfortunately, but he’s just come off of work which is killing him slowly so the risk is worth it. While he waits in the queue he mindlessly scrolls through Twitter.

It’s been a pretty fine holiday, as far as things go. Not too exciting, but nothing traumatic or particularly harrowing, either, which in his family is somewhat surprising. And it’s been nice getting to avoid schoolwork and classmates for a while, as the halls of sixth form can be crowded with some right pricks. In fact, there’s one prick in particular he hasn’t missed one bit, and as he sees him on his Twitter feed he’s reminded of how glad he is not to have to be in his presence every day.

The only reason he doesn’t have Phil Lester blocked and muted is because he doesn’t want to seem petty. All of his friends seem to like Phil just fine, but they also know that Dan isn’t exactly his number one fan. However, the last thing Dan wants is to cause drama where there doesn’t need to be, and a single tap of the ‘block’ icon could put him in a world of unnecessary trouble. But that doesn’t change the fact that Dan Howell, from the bottom of his heart, hates Phil Lester.

Though, surprisingly, no one else seems to. It seems like Dan’s the only one who can see past his persona of Mr. Perfectly Quirky and Funny and into who he really is. He’s not that funny, and he acts like he’s the smartest kid in the entire world but surely, he must not know everything, despite his best attempts to make everyone think so. Seriously, he’s always the first to raise his hand in chem, spewing facts left and right, which makes him the worst lab partner in the entire world. Phil always has to double check Dan’s work even though he’s right on all his arithmetic ninety-five percent of the time, he always makes some comment about how Dan’s handwriting is getting messier by the week, and worst of all, he’s never wrong. That’s what sucks about it. Phil Lester is never wrong. He’s perfect.

And he makes Dan feel like an idiot. Sometimes, it feels like he’s going out of his way to purposely paint Dan as this huge moron, which he knows he isn’t, but it’s hard not to feel that way around Phil. Perfect Phil, with the perfect hair and perfect life and the brightest eyes and the best jokes, who always manages to make Dan trip over his words and say the wrong thing, something stupid. He's always quick to point out Dan’s mistakes. Which, obviously, makes him feel great.

Yeah, well, out of sight, out of mind. Dan scrolls past and tries not to think about him. Why do people even retweet his stuff, anyways? He’s not that funny, but the whole school seems to think he’s some sort of comedy king or something, which gets old really fast, in Dan’s opinion. He’s a smartass, that’s what he is.

Dan finally gets his order in and moves to the side to wait for his food, when the voice he least expected to hear sounds from behind him.

“Dan?”

Sure enough, Dan turns around, and Phil sort of materializes before him, in a hoodie and skinny jeans and, funnily enough, glasses. Dan’s not a confrontational person. He’s not. Never has been. He tends to internalize his seething rage against Phil. Usually, it works. “Hi there,” Dan replies, and thus continues his long list of dumb things he says in front of Phil.

“Small world, eh?”

Dan shrugs. “I suppose.”

Silence. Then, “You getting food?”

“Yep.” Dan takes a breath. “You?”

“Yeah. But not for me. My brother’s been a bit under the weather since boxing day and he asked that I go get him some extra crappy food to help him feel better.”

Of course Phil’s not getting McDonald’s for himself. He’s way too perfect, way too healthy, for that. When doesn’t he have a pedestal to stand on? “Cool,” Dan says instead. “I mean, not about your brother. That sucks, I’m sorry.”

Phil laughs. “It’s fine, don’t worry about it. How’s your break been?”

“Alright. A bit dull, I guess. But sometimes it’s better if nothing happens rather than something bad, right?”

“I agree. You never know when loose cannon racist Uncle Joe is gonna ruin Christmas dinner, right?”

“I’ve been there one too many times.”

“Same.”

Could it be true? Could Dan actually be getting through a conversation with Phil Lester without making a fool of himself or wanting to strangle him to death or both? Only time would tell, he reasons, but still. So far, so okay. “Get anything good for Christmas?” Phil asks.

“My brother and I got a Switch for Christmas, and we’ve both been playing it a lot. At least, when I’m not at work.”

Phil gasps. “No way! We did too!”

“That’s awesome,” Dan replies, a grin spreading across his face. “What games do you have?”

“So far we’ve just got Super Mario Odyssey, but we also really wanna get the new Zelda game so my brother can play it before he has to go back to uni.”

“I hear it’s amazing,” says Dan. “We want to get that as well.”

“Maybe if we both play it we can compare notes and stuff.”

“Yeah, maybe.” This is easily one of the longest conversations he’s ever had with Phil, and certainly the only one where he didn’t feel like self-destructing out of pure annoyance at Phil’s stupid face. The longest he’d gone without seeming like a massive idiot. Maybe there’s something about Phil wearing glasses that makes him easier to get on with.

“So, any New Year’s plans?”

“Well, I’m going to my friend Chris’ for New Year’s Eve. Since his birthday is so close, he always has a party then.” Okay, Dan, stop talking. It always really bothered him when people talked about their plans in front of others who weren’t invited. “It’s gonna be super cool, you should totally come, I mean, if you don’t have plans.” What the fuck are you doing? “He’s gonna have alcohol and stuff, too, and it’ll be legal, well, for him at least, and obviously he’ll have, like, real food too.” Are you done now, moron? “Anyways, yeah, I’m sure he’d be happy to have you, if you were interested. I mean, you probably already have stuff planned, I’m sure.” He waits for his dumb tongue to stop betraying him, and eventually, he really does stop talking, exhaling slowly. Dan, one day your mouth is going to get you killed.

Phil raises his eyebrows, but he wears a huge grin. “That sounds like fun, Dan. I’ll totally come.”

Well, Dan was eventually bound to do or say something stupid, right? It wouldn’t be a real conversation with Phil unless it ended with Phil’s superior smirk and Dan’s sinking feeling of inadequacy. “Great, cool, see you then,” Dan says. Oh my god, you fucking idiot.

“Phil!” a guy from the front counter announces.

“Oh, that’ll be my food,” Phil says, still wearing the same stupid grin on his stupid face. He pushes through the small crowd and examines his bag. Dan, in the meantime, stares back at his phone. What did he just do? It’s not as though he has a great track record for getting along with Phil, and the last thing he wants to do is ruin his friend’s party. And besides, since when did he have permission to invite random people from school to any of his friend’s parties, birthday or otherwise? Was it not a teeny bit presumptuous of him to say ‘Oh Chris won’t mind another person in his flat, where he’ll have to accommodate more space for you as well as getting even more food and drinks?’ This was a mistake. Maybe it’s not too late to rescind the invitation, to make up a fake story about how the party isn’t happening anymore. “This yours?” Phil asks, pulling Dan out of his thoughts. He hands him a bag and a coffee.

Dan grimaces. “Yeah, I guess it is.”

“You must not have heard your name,” he explains. “It was next to mine, so I just picked it up.”

“Cheers,” Dan replies, but all he wants to do is melt into the floor and forget the past five minutes ever happened.

“Well, I’ve gotta run,” says Phil. “But I’ll see you New Year’s Eve, yeah?”

Now or never, Howell. “Uh, yeah. Great.”

“Cool. Bye, then!” He flashes Dan one last friendly smile before leaving. Of course, on top of it all, he gets the last word.

---

Since there’s not a lot Dan can do about it now, the next day he rings Chris to tell him about his grave mistake, to at least attempt to be a better friend.

“What’s up?” greets Chris upon answering. “Still coming to the party tomorrow, right?”

“About that,” Dan replies, biting his nails. “I kinda invited someone yesterday, is that okay? I know space can be tight but I promise I didn’t really mean to, and if you say no it’s fine, I just--”

“Dan, I’m gonna stop you right there.” He can practically hear the smirk in Chris’ voice, and he already feels a bit daft. “You’re totally fine, I promise. The more the merrier. Who’d you invite, if I might ask?”

Deep breaths. There’s no way he can phrase this without sounding like an idiot, so he might as well bite the bullet now. “Uh, you know Phil Lester, right?”

Chris actually laughs, which Dan half expected, because everyone knows they don’t like each other. Although, to be fair, he didn’t think Chris cared. “That’s who you invited?” he manages to choke out between giggles.

“Yeah, I know, shocker. Like I said, I didn’t mean to, I just felt bad because I mentioned you and stuff. It’s okay if you say no.”

“I didn’t, uh.” Chris stops. He releases another little giggle before continuing. “I didn’t mean to laugh, at least, not at you.”

“Oh, gee, thanks.” Dan rolls his eyes, though Chris obviously can’t see.

“It’s just kinda funny, because I already invited him, and as far as I know he already said he was coming.”

Dan’s eyes widen. “What the fuck?” he says, before he can stop himself. “I mean, no. Sorry, that’s not what I meant. Why did you invite him?”

“I dunno, we have Lit together and we got to talking about the break and I invited him to my party. Why did you invite him?”

“I already told you, it was a complete accident, and obviously I didn’t know he was already coming, otherwise I wouldn’t have, clearly.” Dear Christ, was he doomed to make a fool of himself every single time he was in front of Phil? Maybe the safest course of action would be to just never say anything to him or in front of him ever again. That still left the possibility of him physically doing something stupid, but at least he could minimize the damage.

“Well, either way, Phil’s already coming, so no need to worry. Anyone else you want to invite who I invited myself? PJ maybe? Or Hazel?”

“I’m fine, thanks,” Dan responds through gritted teeth. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Great! See ya!” Chris hangs up, and Dan can hear him laughing.

It doesn’t make sense. Why didn’t Phil say anything yesterday? Did he derive pleasure in seeing Dan make an idiot of himself? How was Dan supposed to know he and Chris were friends? It wasn’t fair, it so wasn’t fair. Can Dan not have just one day where he doesn’t make a complete joke of himself?

No, not where Phil’s involved. As long as Phil is there, Dan isn’t safe from being the laughingstock of the universe.

---

December thirty first comes around, and a big part of Dan wants to just pretend he’s sick and stay home, because he can’t stand to be around Phil or even Chris, frankly, after embarrassing himself so profusely. But that would only make him seem like a coward, and Chris would make some smartass remark to Phil and make Dan seem foolish without him even being there, so he drudges himself over to Chris’ flat, despite his wishes, and hopes for the best. For all the good that’ll do him.

Dan buzzes into Chris’ place (by now he knows the code) and treks up the stairs. Chris answers the door before he can knock and shouts, “Dan! I’m so glad you could make it!” He leads him inside. “Everyone! Dan is here!”

‘Everyone’ shouts a chorus of slurred hoorays. So the drinking has already commenced. He greets a few people, saying hi to Hazel and PJ and Louise who are deep in a very loud conversation about the new Star Wars movie, and Tom and Jack, who are locked in perhaps the most intense game of go fish Dan’s ever seen. He gets some crisps and migrates over to the couch, where he collapses. He’d been working all day long; he’s actually kind of exhausted, and doesn’t feel like socializing, especially considering how sober he is compared to everyone else. He closes his eyes. It’s too much right now.

“Hey, stranger.” Dan opens his eyes and there sits Phil, on the other side of the sofa. Great. Just what he fucking needed right now.

“Hi,” he replies.

“You seem tired.”

“I was working overtime today. I kinda don’t want to be here, if I’m honest.”

“Well, I’m glad you’re here,” Phil says, and he smiles, and it’s so genuine, too genuine, just like everything Phil does, so overly thoughtful and perfect. “Get the new Zelda game?”

“Haven’t had time.”

Phil nods. “Me neither.”

Here’s what Dan doesn’t get: Why is Phil being so nice to him all of a sudden? He usually teases Dan for getting answers wrong in class or in the labs or for his messy penmanship or whatever else he chooses after spinning the things-to-make-fun-of-dan-for wheel. He’s the basic definition of a walking dick, though no one else seems to see that, and he has no reason to be nice to Dan. So, what’s changed? Maybe he’s still feeling post-holiday forgiveness or good tidings or whatever else. Maybe he’s planning to lure Dan into a false sense of security before yelling at him for his dumb hair that he didn’t feel like straightening or his old car or the fact that he foolishly invited him to Chris’ house even though he already had every intention of going. Or maybe you think too much.

“Is work going okay?” asks Phil.

“I suppose. It’s not fun but it could be worse, and at the end of the day, a paycheck’s a paycheck. Can’t complain.”

“Right.” Phil smiles. They sit in silence for a moment, listening to the music. At any moment, their truce could come toppling down, Dan realizes. “Thanks for inviting me, by the way.”

Dan rolls his eyes. “Yeah, well, Chris told me you were already coming, so.”

Phil smiles sheepishly, looking down at his shoes. “He did?”

“Yep. Thanks for the memo, by the way. Would have been nice to know before I, ya know, invited you to a party you were already going to, like a moron.” And just like that, the truce has ended.

“Hey! In my defense, I was really surprised that you did that, and I had no idea what to say, because it was really nice of you.” He shakes his head a little bit. “I just kind of went along with it. You weren’t, I mean, it wasn’t…” he stops. “It wasn’t moronic. Not at all. It was sweet.”

“Oh, that makes me feel loads better,” Dan scoffs. “Look, next time you wanna make a fool out of me, at least have the dignity to tell me to my face that I’m being an idiot.” Christ, he didn’t mean to sound like such an asshole. Why can’t you ever say anything right?

And, what’s worse, Phil actually looks hurt. “You weren’t a fool,” he insists. “You aren’t one, okay? And that wasn’t my intention at all.”

Right, Dan, there’s your cue to shut up now. “Oh, really? Because it feels like every time I talk you, all you want to do is make me feel like I’m nothing, like I’m a fucking idiot. So, excuse me if I thought this was just another one of your secret schemes to turn me into the laughingstock of the century.” He knows he needs to stop talking, but a huge part of him feels good for finally standing up to Phil for once in his life.

“I’ve never purposely tried to make you feel like an idiot, Dan, I promise.” His voice remains surprisingly even. “I’m sorry if you felt that way.”

Dan stares at the floor, hoping if he says nothing he can’t possibly say the wrong thing. “Me, a secret schemer?” Phil continues. “Honestly? You’re the one who doesn’t like me, Dan. I’ve been nothing but nice to you ever since we met but you don’t want to accept it, for whatever reason. Did you honestly think I was trying to trick you, or something?” Great. Perfect. Dan the Fucking Idiot strikes again. “Okay, whatever, don’t respond to me. But I wish we could be friends, Dan. You make up all these stories in your head about how much I hate you or whatever but they’re not true. They’re so far from the truth.”

“Well, great, I’m still the idiot, then.” Dan sighs and sinks into the cushions. “I’m sorry for yelling at you.”

“No, I’m sorry, Dan,” replies Phil. “I’m sorry for lying to you about the party. Believe me, I was the one who felt like an idiot afterwards. I was way too awkward to tell you the truth so I kind of just didn’t say anything and hoped for the best. Which clearly didn’t work.”

Dan actually smiles at that, just a bit. “No, it did not,” he agrees.

“Can we just, like, start over?”

“Sure, yeah.”

“Cool.”

“Come on,” Phil prompts, sitting up. “Let’s go get something to drink. You look like you need it.”

Dan rubs his eyes and rises to his feet. “You have no idea.”

---

So it takes Dan vodka and coke to warm up to the idea of maybe being friends with Phil, but who could blame him? Everything’s happening so fast; Phil’s dragging him to the kitchen and talking to him like a pal as if the past ten minutes, or even the past few months, haven’t happened. Phil pours the bottle of vodka into a cup of soda and asks Dan what his favorite TV shows are and it makes no sense.

They’re too different, Dan always thought. That’s why they never got on, because they were so different they had no hope of ever understanding each other. It was a fruitless quest. But maybe they’re not. Phil gets a refill on his drink as well and laughs a bit and remarks that he forgot to ask Dan what he wanted, he just assumed he’d have the same thing Phil was having. Dan assures him that it’s fine and this is probably what he would have made for himself too and, maybe they’re not that different.

They move back to the couch and try to ignore the fact that everyone’s staring at them, and Dan really can’t blame them as they did just kind of have a loud fight a few minutes ago. The first sip of the drink doesn’t go down well, it never does, but it gets easier and easier and pretty soon Dan’s already starting to feel better. He knows this can’t last, because he has to drive home in about four and a half hours but for now he can pretend like the future isn’t coming. Instead of thinking about that, he and Phil just talk, they just sit on the couch and talk and it feels different and nice. That’s what he really can’t get over, most of all. Who knew Phil would actually turn out to be a nice person?

After a while, Chris decides to turn his music up, and Dan and Phil kind of have to shout at each other to be heard. “Okay, so can I just ask,” Phil starts, frowning slightly. “Why, uh, why don’t you like me? Or why didn’t you like me?”

Not really the question Dan wanted to hear, after trying to turn his opinion about Phil around. “I don’t dislike you.”

“That’s a lie and we both know it.”

Dan sighs. “Fine. It’s because you don’t like me.”

“I like you,” he insists. “I’ve always liked you.”

“You don’t really act like it.”

That stops Phil short. “Well, in my defense, you’re pretty easy to tease about stuff.”

“Hey!” Dan exclaims. “That’s not very nice.”

“Trust me, it’s not a bad thing.” Phil smiles a little bit. He’s got a nice smile. He should do that more often. “I only do it because…”

“Because why?”

“Because nothing.” He crosses his arms. “Be serious, why don’t you like me?”

Dan frowns. “Well, okay, it’s just, like…” Don’t mess this up, don’t mess this up. “You’re just so fucking perfect, like all the time. You come here and you’re the new kid but you make friends effortlessly because you’re perfect and you’re smart and always say the right answers in chem which infuriates me because I used to be that kid that always knew everything but you waltzed into class and you were always right and suddenly I knew nothing . Every single day you come to class, you make me feel so stupid because you’re so smart and your hair is perfectly straight and exactly what I wish my hair looked like, and you’re just as tall, if not taller than me but you manage to make it look good, and you’re always up there on your high horse and I feel inadequate around you all the time. And it, like, never made sense to me that other people couldn’t see how too perfect you are.”

It all comes out in a complete rush, before Dan can stop himself. Instantly he knows he’s overshared, as Phil winces when Dan looks at him expectantly, waiting for an answer. “I’m not perfect,” Phil finally says. “I can’t believe you think I’m perfect.”

“Well, can you blame me? I mean, look at yourself. You weren’t even at McDonald’s for you, you were getting food for your brother. Kind, thoughtful, healthy and conscientious Phil.”

Phil just shakes his head. “I can’t believe that’s why you don’t like me, because I’m too ‘perfect.’” He does air quotes around that last word.

“Whatever,” Dan mumbles. “I feel embarrassed even though I also feel like I’m right.”

“I’m furthest thing from perfect,” Phil protests. “I swear.”

“Okay, name one imperfection of yours, I dare you.”

“Fine.” Phil crosses his arms, accepting the challenge. “That day, when I went to McDonald’s. It, I…” He takes a sip of his drink before continuing. “Well, my brother wanted food, but my mom wouldn’t get it for him, and he doesn’t trust me to drive around anymore so he drove the car there, but waited in the parking lot for me to get the food, because he didn’t want to come inside himself.”

“What’s your point?”

“My parents won’t let me drive anymore, because I’ve failed my driving test three times and one time I was driving around and almost got in an accident because I’m literally the shittiest driver in the entire universe.” He sighs, and glances at Dan. “So. Strike one. I’m not perfect.”

“To be fair, no one passes their driving test the first time around. You’ll have to do better than that.”

“Okay. Fine. I wear contacts.”

“Yeah, well, I already guessed that. I saw you in glasses, remember?”

Phil’s face turns a brilliant shade of pink. “Oh, right.”

“And you looked cute in glasses, so, whatever, that doesn’t count as an imperfection. Try again.”

He thinks for a moment, then, “I dye my hair.”

“What?” Dan gasps.

“Yeah. I’m naturally a ginger but I look horrendous so, I dye it like once a month. It’s kind of embarrassing.” He takes another sip. “I don’t think I’ve ever told anyone that.”

“Well, it looks great. I had no idea.”

“I’m only telling you that because I’m not sober, just so you know.”

“I’ll take it.”

Phil smiles. “But speaking of hair, I didn’t know yours was curly.”

“Oh,” Dan replies, cheeks turning red. “I didn’t have time to straighten it before going to work, and then I just couldn’t be bothered, so.” He self consciously brushes his fringe out of his eyes.

“I think it looks great.”

“Thanks.” He takes a sip. “Well, anyways, you get my point, right? You’re frustratingly perfect. It makes me want to strangle you sometimes.”

“You’ve completely misjudged me, Howell. I’m so far from perfect.”

He’s almost finished with his drink so he’s feeling extra brave, and before he knows it, he blurts, “Well, what do you think of me? You know, so I can also prove your misconceptions about me wrong.”

“I dunno. I think you’re really funny, you’ve got a sort of dark sense of humor that I like, and you’re also super passionate about your opinions, which I appreciate. Even when those opinions happen to be regarding your deep hatred of me.”

“Look,” Dan tries to defend, but Phil isn’t hearing any of it.

“No, it’s okay. You wear your heart on your sleeve. And you care an awful lot. That’s not nothing. I admire that about you.”

Dan’s heart stops in its tracks. His stomach churns. “I’m such an idiot,” he mutters to himself.

“Why, Dan?”

“I really thought you hated me,” he says quietly, wishing he could disappear.

“No, I don’t hate you, Dan. I feel like I know you, ya know? Like, I just have this feeling, like, I look at you and I know who you are. I wish I had that ability, too.”

“What do you mean?”

“Like, you clearly had me all completely wrong in your head. But I can just see you for you. I know that you’re passionate and loyal and compelling and--”

“Guys!” Chris shouts from behind their place on the couch. “We’re about to play cards against humanity, and you have to play. Also you’re not allowed to say no because it’s my birthday.”

They begrudgingly sit around the dining table, with their friends who are all decidedly at least twice as drunk as Dan and Phil are, which is fine, but maybe a slight bit alienating. Dan’s tipsy, sure, but he’s not flat-out drunk, mostly because he has to drive home but also because he hasn’t eaten anything all day and the last thing he needs is to throw up at his friend’s place. Especially since Phil’s there, and, yeah, he really needs one more reason to feel like an idiot in front of him. But, Phil doesn’t think of him as an idiot, in a strange turn of events. He’s not one hundred percent sure that he believes him, but why would he lie?

“Do you guys need a refill?” Hazel asks them, nodding to their almost empty cups.

“I’m good, thanks,” Dan says. “I’m driving, so.”

She shrugs. “Suit yourself. Phil?”

“I’m alright.”

“God, do you two even know how to have fun?” She smirks and rolls her eyes. “Whatever, more for us fun people.”

Hazel makes her leave to the kitchen to refill her drink and Phil laughs a little. The sight makes Dan’s heart rate speed up a little; Phil sticks his tongue out of his mouth and his eyes crinkle in the perfect way and all of his teeth show and okay, okay, why is he thinking like this right now? What just happened to make him notice something like that, something so trivial and inconsequential? Why has Dan never noticed that Phil’s eyes aren’t actually blue, but they’re blue and green and gold and they kind of look like a kaleidoscope?

He has to turn his mindset back around before it’s too late. “What, Goody Two Shoes Phil doesn’t want to get drunk?” Dan teases.

“Yeah, well, my parents are already mad enough at me as it is. I don’t need another reason to upset them.”

“Why are they upset with you?”

“They’re just…” He sighs. “I guess they’re not mad, they just really didn’t want me to come here, because they’re frustrated that they have to come pick me up and drive me home so late, and I guess I just feel bad, because we usually spend today together, and like, I turn eighteen in a month so it’s gonna be legal for me to drink soon, but they don’t want me to until I’m nineteen, which is bullshit, but they’re my parents, so.”

“Guys!” Chris shouts, interrupting their conversation. “Have either of you played your cards yet?”

“Fuck, sorry,” Dan apologizes. He picks a random card about George Clooney and passes it down. Phil follows suit. Chris begins to read out the cards he has, but Dan is barely listening. “I can take you home,” Dan says quietly. “Don’t worry about it.”

“You sure?” Phil asks.

“Positive.”

“Okay. I’ll text my parents.” The group laughs hysterically at one of the answers, bringing them back to reality.

“Right, I’m picking this one,” Chris announces. “Who played it?” Louise proudly raises her hand, and everyone claps.

Even though the game continues, Dan and Phil don’t really pay attention, lost in conversation with each other. It’s a bit hard to hear over the noise of drunk teens yelling dirty jokes at each other, but it doesn’t seem to matter. Dan feels relaxed around Phil for the first time ever, and maybe it’s the vodka but that’s starting to wear off in all honesty and it more just feels like Phil’s a generally nice person and he’s been missing out on him and his company since September when they met. It takes them about ten minutes to realize no one’s actually playing the game anymore and they’re instead just finding their favorite cards in the pack, trying to make each other laugh. They quietly sneak off back to the couch to continue to talk and no one seems to mind. It’s like he’s been missing Phil his whole life, like the moment they start to just talk he’s picking up from where they left off, even though really they never even started, not really.

Maybe Phil Lester the jerk wasn’t such a jerk after all.

---

Eventually, the group moves to the living room and puts on a movie, crowding the space that was previously just being occupied by Dan and Phil. But Dan doesn’t really mind, and anyways the more he talks to Phil the more he realizes that maybe his feelings of hatred were a bit misguided or maybe they were disguising themselves as hatred because he couldn’t face the truth. Now there’s something he’s really afraid to consider.

Phil gets up from his self-proclaimed spot on the couch to go to the bathroom at around eleven, when people are starting to get either drunker or more sober, waiting for the clock to strike midnight and ring in the new year. PJ takes this opportunity to slide over to press up against Dan, a huge grin on his face.

“What’s up, Daniel?” he asks. He smells overwhelmingly of vodka.

“Not much, excited for the new year, I guess.”

PJ waggles his eyebrows suggestively. “You gonna go for it?”

“Go for what?”

“Oh my god, you’re absolutely daft. Everyone knows of the tradition of kissing someone exactly at midnight on New Year’s Day, right?”

Dan freezes. “I… Who…”

“This is your chance, Dan. He likes you, I promise, just go for it.”

“Okay, you keep saying that, but I still don’t know what you’re referring to.” Though, obviously, he does. “Peej, you’re super drunk right now.”

“And you’re not?” He laughs. “You should be!”

“I have to drive myself home.”

He pulls a face. “So?”

“Right, let’s get you some water, you goof.”

He gets up to go to the kitchen and pour him a cup of water from the fridge, and when he comes back to the living room Phil’s back, deep in conversation with Hazel. He tries his best to ignore the pang of jealousy in his gut because Seriously, are you fucking kidding me? One minute you hate him and the next you don’t want anyone else to look his way? Maybe he’s always felt that way, like there’s always been some kind of underlying jealousy. But jealousy of what? His personality? His hair? His ability to make friends with all of Dan’s friends but somehow be better at it?

“Here you go, Peej,” Dan says, handing him the cup.

“I don’t want it,” he whines in response, but Dan practically forces it down his throat. He makes eye contact with Phil as he attempts to shove the cup into PJ’s hand, and Phil smiles at him and his heart explodes a little bit and, yeah, you’re an absolute gonner.

“Do it, Dan,” PJ whispers into his ear. “Do it for me, if nothing else.”

“Drink your water and I’ll think about it, arsehole.”

It works. PJ sits up straight and practically chugs the whole thing in an instant, earning him a satisfied pat on the back from Dan. He doesn’t mind playing the mom friend at parties, in fact, it makes him feel good. If he can save someone from dying of alcohol poisoning, he can justify coming to this party.

“Dan!” Phil gestures for Dan to sit next to him, as Hazel’s gotten up to get snacks.

“Having fun?” Dan asks, eyebrows raised. He’s pretty sober as far as things go but he still feels like his brain is going a bit haywire which is just great, just brilliant, because that confirms everything and why does this have to happen here, at a party in front of all his friends, on the most cliche night of the year, with music from the movie on TV swelling and laughter and drinks and it’s all just so much, it’s way too much for him right now. And seriously, of all people, Phil? Like, why couldn’t it be someone he knew and actually tolerated?

“Did you hear me, Dan?” Phil asks, bringing him back to reality.

Brilliant, fucking brilliant. What was it about Phil that always made him feel like he was one step behind, all the time? “Sorry, no, what did you say?” Seriously, can God just come smite me where I stand already?

“I said I’m having a great time. Your friends are super cool.”

“Glad you think so.” Can this not happen, please? Not now.

“And you aren’t so bad yourself.” Phil winks, and seriously, Dan feels like a year four, like a child in primary school, with a secret crush and a secret diary full of unsent love letters and this cannot be happening.

“Thanks, Phil.”

“So, any resolutions for the new year?” Phil asks.

“No, not really. What’s the point of making them if you can’t stick to them?”

Phil shrugs. “You never know until you try, right?”

“Okay, fine, what’s your resolution then?”

Phil thinks for a moment, then says, “To just be more authentic. To live a more honest version of myself, whatever that means for me. No unrealistic or unattainable goals. Just, not try to hide or fix myself in front of others. However it happens.”

Dan laughs in spite of himself. “A bit too meta for me, but the sentiment is there, I suppose.”

“I think New Year’s resolutions are fun to make, even if you don’t end up sticking to them. It’s the thought that counts, really.”

“See, this is what I’m talking about. Everything you say, it’s perfect. How do you do it?”

“What can I say? I must be born with it.” He does a fake flip of his hair and giggles. Phil needs to stop fucking giggling because it’s driving Dan insane, it’s contagious and it makes Dan laugh right along with him. Phil makes him feel so safe and warm and like he’s Dan’s missing piece and every other cliche the world has to offer him but fuck it, it’s true. And maybe he’s just completely misreading the signals and maybe Phil still secretly hates him and maybe Phil’s straight as a stick (though to be fair Dan used to think he was so that means nothing) but if he can’t say it now, when can he?

“Phil, can I ask you something?”

“Sure, Dan.”

His confidence is dwindling by the nanosecond. “You’re not mad at me for being a dick to you for months, right?” Justsayitjustsayitjustsayitjustsayit--

“No, of course not. How could I be mad at you? I’m mad at myself, if anything, for being a dick to you.”

Dan opens his mouth to speak, but his words die in his throat and he knows he needs to just say it but nothing is happening.

“I wasn’t doing it with any malicious intent,” Phil continues. “It’s just that being nice to you didn’t seem to work, and it was the only other way I could think to get you to talk to me.”

“And why…” His voice is close to failing him. “Why would you want that?”

“Well, I--”

“Guys!” Chris shouts, interrupting them. “It’s eleven forty-five! Almost midnight! I’m breaking out the champagne! Come help me!”

Phil rolls his eyes and gets up with the rest of the party, which is moving to the kitchen to break out the grand finale of alcohols, the champagne. Dan tries not to feel disappointed, but then again, perhaps this is a sign. Chris pops open the bottle and everyone cheers and PJ brings him glasses. Jack helps to pass them out to everyone and Dan takes his, even though he has no intention of actually drinking it.

Chris changes the channel so they can watch the countdown live with the rest of Britain and Dan’s nerves go completely haywire. Everyone’s crowding around the TV and anticipation buzzes in the air and the guy on TV announces that there’s two minutes left until the new year begins and Phil’s on the other side of the room now and his heart hurts a bit. He puts his cup down on the side table to resist temptation. One minute left. He feels someone brush the back of his hand and it’s Phil and time slows down and the people around him fall away.

The countdown is happening around him. He locks eyes with Phil and he’s pretty sure someone just shoved a party popper into his hand but he really doesn’t care. Twenty-one, twenty, nineteen… Phil grabs his hand. Okay, okay, breathe, you need to remember to breathe, don’t fucking pass out for the love of all that is holy. Ten, nine, eight…

Now or never, Dan. Now or never. Now or never.

Five, Phil pulls him closer.

Four, Dan moves his hands to Phil’s waist.

Three, Phil moves his hands to the back of Dan’s head.

Two, Dan leans in. Or maybe Phil does. Or maybe--

One.

Shouts of joy, the mini explosions of party poppers, and choruses of “Happy New Year!” fill the room, and Dan kisses Phil. He feels soft and warm and they fit together so perfectly, and Dan pulls him impossibly close to his body and wow, why didn’t they do this sooner? It feels like fireworks, like the fireworks that are currently going off on TV, and it’s everything he could have imagined only magnified by about a million. It’s perfect. Perfect, just like Phil.

Applause erupts. Dan and Phil finally break away and see that everyone seems to be cheering for them. He completely forgot that there were other people in the room that could see them and now everyone knew. Awesome. Phil giggles and breaks the embrace, squeezing Dan’s hand instead. He’s completely and utterly mortified.

“About bloody time,” Chris remarks, shaking his head.

Dan scoffs. “Mind your own damn business.”

“Stop making out in front of everyone!” retorts Chris.

“What, we weren’t,” Dan stutters, but Phil just smiles and squeezes his hand again. Somehow, it’s not making Dan feel any better.

“Oh, leave them alone,” Louise scoffs at her friends, and soon their attention turns back to the TV, though they don’t stop laughing. Phil peers at Dan from behind his fringe and Dan can’t help but push it back a little and he can’t stop smiling and he knows he’s gone all red from embarrassment but he’s still on cloud nine. He kissed Phil. Or maybe Phil kissed him. Now he can’t really remember. It doesn’t matter, probably.

Party poppers explode and glasses clink and Dan kisses Phil again and nothing has felt more perfect in his whole life. He tastes like vodka and sugar cookies and Dan probably tastes the same and how could he have ever thought a thought as stupid as hating Phil Lester?

Phil laughs a bit, and pulls away. “My phone’s ringing,” he explains apologetically. He pulls it out of his pocket. “Fuck. It’s my mum.”

“Oh.” Dan takes a step back. “You should get that.”

Phil accepts the call while Dan sits back down on the couch. Around him, his friends start to clean up the flat. He hasn’t had a lot of time to process what just happened but now he can. Though, it’s fruitless, as he can barely believe any of this just happened.

Phil curls up next to him. “No… Mum, don’t worry… I don’t… Yes, he’s gonna take me home… I promise… Okay. Love you.” He closes his eyes and sighs. “Bye.”

A ghost of a smile remains on his face, but his eyes have lost their sparkle. “My mom wants me to come home,” he announces. “Do you still want to take me?”

“Yeah. Not like I still need to be here.”

“You’re sure you’ll be okay to drive and stuff?”

“I swear.”

“Positive?”

Dan leans in and plants a kiss on Phil’s nose. “Let’s go.”

Phil smiles and blushes. Dan’s never seen him so soft before. He’s still perfect, though. Still perfect. “Okay,” Phil whispers. “Okay.”

On their way out, Dan swears he can hear Chris whisper to PJ, “My work here is done.”

---

“Come on, slowpoke!” Dan shouts from his car, leaning on the horn. No response. Figures, the guy takes about a half hour at least to straighten his hair. And besides, he liked to make Dan wait. Annoying, since it was Dan doing him a favor and Dan asking for nothing in return. But then Phil comes bounding down the stairs and pulls the passenger’s door open.

“Right. Let’s go,” Phil commands, slamming the door shut.

“Yes sir,” replies Dan.

“Alright, alright, lose the attitude.”

“I’m your school chauffeur, I can act however I like.” He backs out of the driveway and speeds down the road to school. “By the way, we’re late. Again.”

“We’ll be fine.” He leans over the dashboard and gives Dan a peck on the cheek. “Better?”

“Marginally.”

“Whatever. You’re no fun.” Phil fake-pouts, crossing his arms and staring out the window.

Dan concentrates on the road in front of him, but a grin appears on the corner of his mouth. “I think what you meant to say was, ‘Thank you, my wonderful, beautiful, attractive boyfriend, for driving me to school every day, how could I ever repay you.’”

“As soon as I get my license, I am never driving in a car with you ever again.”

“Good to know you’ll always ride with me, then.”

Phil scoffs. “I’m telling you, the fourth time’s the charm.”

“Whatever you say, Lester.”

They’re both quiet for a bit, watching blocks and blocks of flats go by. “Thank you, Dan.”

“For what?”

Phil shrugs. “Everything?” Dan glances at him, and God he’s so beautiful, it almost hurts. Even in the early morning sun, it’s like looking into the night sky, into an entire galaxy.

“Ditto,” Dan replies. They’re almost to school, with only five minutes to spare.

“Ugh, don’t get all sappy on me.”

“What can I say? I’m a poet.”

Dan parks the car and turns to face Phil properly. They kiss, a real one this time. It’s warm. Phil pulls away slightly. “We’re actually going to be late, though.” He grabs his backpack and opens the car door.

“Your fault,” Dan replies, doing the same.

“I can live with that.”

“Yeah.” Dan leans across the car to kiss Phil one last time. “Me too.”

[livefuntravelposts]

Top Places to Visit in Finland

The last time Kati and I were in Finland, we were standing in 5 feet of snow looking for the Northern Lights.  It was a cold, bitter winter night and the only thing that got us through was eating reindeer stew along the road.  It warmed us up and kept us going.  But Finland is a lot more than just the Northern Lights.  Finland is a land of incredible lush green sights, long lakes, and vast seas. The country is home to a record 179,584 Islands and 188,000 lakes. The four main archipelagos in Finland are; Helsinki, Kotka, the Archipelago Sea, and the Kvarken archipelago - a UNESCO Heritage site. Finland is also famed for its robust health care system and highly efficient education system. But that's not all that this beautiful Nordic country has to offer. The country is a favourite destination with most folks living in Europe . Fondly  known as "The home of a thousand lakes" Finland is a magical treasure box filled with stunning and fascinating attractions! From the Northern lights to the magical winter and irresistible summers, it is undoubtedly a hidden gem waiting to be explored by both the young and old alike.     Why Visit Finland? Snuggled perfectly between Sweden to the west and Russia to the east, Finland shares certain traits with its Scandinavian neighbors. The breathtaking scenery, magnificent rugged coastline, snow-packed ski fields, and the winter Northern Lights. You can enjoy exhilarating activities such as dog sledding, chasing the Northern Lights, and swimming  across the Arctic when you visit Lapland during winter. In addition to the outdoor adventures, this Nordic country also has other enjoyable experiences in store for you! Think steamy and relaxing saunas, delicious cuisines, and trendy, stylish Nordic cafes. We have compiled a list of some of the most irresistible places you must see on your Finland tour.   

Finland is incredible during the winter, but this country has so much to offer year round.  

11 Must-See Attractions In Finland

  1. Meet the Real Santa Claus in Rovaniemi

  Do you have any idea where Santa Claus lives? Don't let anybody fool you that Santa Claus doesn't exist – yes, he does, in  Rovaniemi, Finland!  Doubling as Lapland's official capital and the secret entry point to the Arctic, Rovaniemi is undoubtedly one of the  most iconic tourist destinations. It's without a doubt the best place to launch and end your Christmas visit to Lapland. A must-visit attraction site is Santa Claus Village. This charming theme park encased in the snowy mountains of Lapland is Finland's alternative to Disneyland. You will have a once-in-a-lifetime experience, and most importantly, you will have the opportunity to meet the jolly man himself – Santa Claus! After chatting with Father Christmas, you can stop by Santa's post office and post a postcard to your loved ones back home. Then visit Santa Park, a magical place where kids can discover Father Christmas's Cave.  Experience the Ice Gallery, admire a series of incredible ice sculptures, and even take a tour inside Santa's toy factory. Other outdoor adventures include enjoying a reindeer sleigh ride, ice fishing, making snow sculptures, and exploring the surrounding nature riding a snowmobile. As evening approaches, spend your night at the Arctic Snow Hotel. While there, don't forget to sample out the Lap cuisines, and conclude your night relaxing in one of the incredible ice spas!  

2. Visit the Polar Bears at the Ranua Wildlife Park

Nestled between the magical mires and wild but quaint forest lies Rauna Wildlife Park, an enclave of unruffled experiences mixed with the Arctic wilderness. The Ranua Wildlife Park offers enchanting experiences with Arctic wildlife, and the surrounding nature will take you to the fairytale world Of Snow-White And The Seven Dwarfs. From Rovaniemi, you can start your day driving down to Ranua Wildlife Park, about an hour's drive away. While here, check out the Ranua Zoo; this northernmost zoo pays homage to nearly 50 endangered Arctic animal species. However, the real draw is its polar bears. Be sure to say hi and take photos with Venus and Manse, the two beautiful polar bears living as a couple. Once done with polar bears, experience  a magical excursion in a coach drawn by horses through the whistling forest or a giggly reindeer sleigh ride. While enjoying the tour,  stop by the ecological wolfdog rescue center for a campfire lunch. Other notable activities include a snowmobile ride through the deep crystalline woodlands, or hike through a frozen and barren bog wearing your snowshoes.  

3. Chase down the Northern Lights

Regarded as one of the world's natural wonders, visitors from all over the world flock to Finland every year in the hopes of snapping a photo of these awe-inspiring Northern Lights (Aurora Borealis). The best area to witness the Northern Lights is near Kilpisjarvi. When the sky is bright at that latitude, the chances of seeing an Aurora are 80% percent. So three nights out of four! Those odds must be encouraging. During the winter seasons, the sun appears for a few hours, and the nights are usually very long. The Finns typically call this season "Kaamos." With these conditions, particularly in places like Kilpisjarvi, you can enjoy yourself joining the cross-country skying. Picture yourself skiing during the night while chasing after the Northern lights. It truly is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity and a fantastic way to witness this magnificent phenomenon. If you are not a fan of skiing, don't worry, you can enjoy watching this magnificent wonder at the comfort of your bed inside a glass igloo. Nothing is thrilling, like relaxing under the stars and staying up all night watching as the Northern Lights dance in the sky above you!  

Seeing the Northern Lights is always a highlight. There are many websites which will tell you the best places and nights to go out chasing them.  

4. Lighthouse Island

Finland's coastline has the largest archipelago globally. Naturally, you expect to see lighthouses by the hundreds all over the country's shoreline. The lighthouses have become a magnet for tourists, some with unique features to accommodate visitors willing to spend nights in them. The Bengtskär lighthouse is the tallest in the entire Nord region. It is a pretty magnificent sight to behold. Located on a spectacular Island, you can get to the island by boat, with the best possible season to visit between June - August. Make your bookings early in advance to secure your night stay. Bengtskär lighthouse has six rooms to stay in.  Söderskär lighthouse in Helsinki is a must-see. The journey to Söderskär is more accessible by boat, and it takes an hour to get there and about two hours touring the lighthouse. Activities include; climbing the lighthouse; you get to see the entire landscape from an aerial view. It's quite spectacular. While there, you can have a cup of coffee at the keeper's cottage adjacent to it.  

5. Finnish Saunas and Lakes 

  Kati and I love to take a sauna.  We actually have two saunas.  One at home and we built one in the woods in western North Carolina.  There is nothing better and we actually give the sauna credit for keeping us healthy.  If you think thousands of Finland Islands are enough for one tiny country, there are over 3 million saunas and nearly 190 000 lakes in Finland. Locals enjoy saunas and have made it a favorite pastime. Finns go to enjoy saunas at least once a week. So when you visit, indulge as excessively as time allows you to have a relaxing dip in one of the great saunas.  Finnish Lakeland has the most summer cottages and saunas too. Experience swimming in winter and rolling in the snow around your holiday cottage.  

6. Suomenlinna UNESCO Site

Finland has a record six cultural UNESCO World Heritage sites and one natural UNESCO World Heritage site. The Suomenlinna Fortress Island in Helsinki is a favorite tour destination in Finland. Added to the UNESCO Heritage List in 1991, Suomenlinna is an exceptional military architecture monument. The seven islands of Suomenlinna are comprised of old dungeons and fortresses in an inhabited district in Helsinki. To get to Suomenlinna, take a fifteen minutes ferry ride from the Kauppatori central market square.  

7. Archipelago National Park

Archipelago National Park - a seascape filled with hundreds of islands! It is only 59kilometers away from Turku city. A convenient route to get to the park is through Kimito and Pargas. Positioned directly south of the city, The Archipelago National Park has a lot to give, from Viking settlements to fortified islands. Using Turku as your launching base, you can explore the park by either canoeing or cycling between the quaint towns, with breathtaking landscapes around every corner. You can cycle along the Archipelago trail to Pargas and Nagu islands, which offer an authentic archipelago life experience and a wide range of accommodation. While in Pargas, don't forget to pass by Art Bank for some fine art, then hop onto a boat and head out to Berghain, a fantastic comping site. If you don’t enjoy cycling, go for the Riverine route. You can opt for a kayaking adventure, or if you feel it's too much work, hop into one of the ferries available for a peaceful sightseeing day around the Archipelago Park. Notable areas not to miss include the Rosala Viking Village, the Military island of Oro, The isle of Bengtskar, and finally, the peaceful island community of Uto.  

8. Bear Watching in Suomussalmi

For those who love bears, the best place to watch them is in Suomussalmi, a small region in Finland near the Russian border. There are approximately 1000 brown bears in Finland, but you are unlikely to meet with one while leisurely strolling through the forest. These brown beasts can smell you from afar, and they usually flee before your paths cross. For the best bear-watching experience, hire a local guide. The guides are familiar with the forest and know where to find these beasts.   

9. Try Out Finnish Cuisine

Whether it's in the summer or winter, it doesn't matter which season; sampling out the authentic Finnish delicacy is a must-do activity for anybody visiting Finland. Finnish delicacies combine traditional and chic cuisine, with beef, pork, seafood, and reindeer as the primary ingredients. While strolling through Helsinki Old Market Area, you can start with quick bites, like Finnish Squeaky Cheese, Karelian Pie, and Rye Bread. Try lip-licking typical Finnish sauces with pancakes, Lapland bread cheese, or Riispurro (Rice Porridge) for a more severe breakfast. For lunch and dinner, you are full of choices. You can try out authentic Finnish meals like Pastry Macaroni With Beef Meatballs Smeared with Jam mixed with Mash Potatoes, Roasted Herring, and many other dishes. Lastly, beer lovers can try out local favorites such as Glogg Akvavit, Finnish beers, Finnish Vodka and Sima.

Helsinki is worth exploring and checking out some world class restaurants.

  10. Oulanaka National Park

Oulanka National Park is widely regarded as one of the best national parks in Finland, and with good reason. There are a series of spectacular creeks that run through the Kiutakongas Falls canyon. It's a quick one kilometer  stroll from the parking lot, so you can have a swell  time hiking with your spouse or your loved ones.  Just below the waterfalls, several beautiful rope swing bridges spanning over the canyon. Outdoor adventures are the thing here, and even if you are not athletic, you will have a good time.  

11. Finnish Glass Igloo

Finland is a land of extremes in terms of season contrasts. During summer, the sun stays up all day, and all night, in Northern Finland . This phenomenon  is known as  "The Land of the Midnight Sun." During winter, the opposite happens:  darkness fills the land, giving way to beautiful moonlighting, bright stars  and a romantic setting for a cozy night under warm fires. This time is known as  "kaamos."  During kaamos, it is not entirely dark,  the skies glow from the brisk  the moon, and the stars, reflecting an amazing view from the backdrop of the bright snow across the landscapes. The Northern Lights project  enchanting backdrops from the seashores. An exciting approach to  experience the Midnight sun and Kaamos is to sleep in a a glass igloo, out in the open skies. It’s a magical experience!   Our Final Word Finland is more than just a stunning European destination; it is mystical heaven on Earth that brings the human imagination to life. From the breathtaking sightseeing sites to the enchanted wonderland of snow and fascinating natural phenomena. Finland appeals to a wide range of tourists, including history lovers, nature-buffs, food lovers, and thrill-seekers. There really isn't a best time to see Finland.  Both summer and winter offers travelers an incredible amount of activities. Head to Finland and discover why it is rated as the happiest country on earth.

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[astrofireworks]

cha eunwoo | astro

An introduction to Astro, lights of our lives, for new Arohas!

(done with @rockoaroundthechristmastree, @rockytheastroid​, @astrofireworks​, @jinwoosmile, @ongbins and @jakganim)

masterlist 

Born 30 March 1997

Gunpo child

How to recognise Eunwoo: look for a literal angel there you go there he is

Literally looks the same in all his eras bc he looks good with dark hair and fantagio Knows it

^ At time of writing anyway; he just came out with light brown hair for dream pt. 02′s jacket and everyone is fucKIN SHOOKT

Fuckin unreal smdh

Baby: light blue car

Visual 3/6

@jakganim (in a fic LOL but it was FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY PUNY LIL HEART) said once that Eunwoo’s as beautiful outside as he is on the inside and honestly i’ve never heard a sentence that describes eunwoo so perfectly 

in short, a heart as radiant and beautiful as he appears????

Researches everything bc he’s a diligent and worried bub

Whatever shows he goes on???? He researches them 

researched every single person going on law of the jungle and also researched what the climate was going to be like and how to build different things 

researched the MCs he was going on with when he went on Happy Together 3 and got exposed they read his unfiltered notes out loud in detail he got so shy ajsdfhlaskjd

researched everyone in crime scene 3 because he didn’t want to make a fool of himself 

got so nervous about variety show training programme bc they didn’t let him know who was going to be on the show with him so he couldn’t research them

puts so much effort into things what the fuck ! 

Real Name: Lee Dong Min 

Nickname: Buttmin (Lee Dongmin: 이동민) where second letter 동 sounds similar to the second letter in butt (엉덩이) because he thought he had a big butt asjdhlfakjsd

he can spell his name with his butt thanks variety show training

Actor 

Was MJ in The Best Hit/Hit the Top (and the members made jokes about it)

had a thing with the members where they’d call him Fake MJ 

Starred in their webdrama To Be Continued as the “lead” but not really (cries forever)

Was part of a miniseries called “Replies that Make us Flutter” where they took send-in answers for topics and incorporated them into short drama episodes. 

Bin starred in one with him as well. He tried to be a bad boy that hated Eunwoo. It was not convincing.

Won Male CF Star at the MTN Broadcast CF Festival

He’s currently in Revenge Note as the “leader” of Astro, it’s weird

#SmartBoi

goes to Sungkyungkwan uni, prestigious uni in SK

was also the top 3rd student in his school AND was student body president in middle school i’m truly weeping

Introduced on a few shows with the hashtag #차파고 (Cha-pha Go, a spin on Alpha Go) because he’s so damn diligent and detailed 

Also went on 1 v 100 with bin and mj but he got into the finals/semi-finals WOW WE STAN BRAINS AND BEAUTY 

Knows japanese and chinese and is nearly fluent in english bless his heart

Also speaks Chinese because his younger brother studies in China

DONGHWIIIIIIIIIIIII

Cute as fuck during new year’s when the rest of astro were in the fantz celebrating new year’s he went home to visit his brother bc he came back from china so he video called into vapp

I need to stop saying fantz someone shoot me i started ironically and now i can’t stop

Once upon a time was in the jungle with Yuri, apparently picked up aegyo there

Gets made fun of all the time by astro for the aegyo asjdfkhlskjd they make him sing the aegyo song literally every time 

And they annoy him by singing it too

Always gets iconic lines / killing parts in songs 

내꺼할래 !! (wanna be mine?)

같이 갈래? (let’s go together?)

Iconic line in polaris

Here’s a compilation you didn’t know you needed

Again made fun of by astro for doing the 같이 갈래

That one astro play where he’s just talking and then lil bitches sanha and jinjin pop up behind him and go 같이 갈래!!! and he just looks so done

The centre of all of Astro’s arm symbol formations 

Makes sure that you know who he is (bc he’s cHa-A e-EUN Wu-UU *thumps chest*) 

This ALSO gets mimicked by the other members, and poor boy tried to chug a soda and do this as well but ended up burping on camera as a result ;v;

Also the stiffest dancer my poor son

Got sent on some programme for idols who can’t dance it was Hilarious

But he also put so much effort into it i’m rly crying he made sure to get help from rocko in dancing the choreography right ;;;;

And he’s improved so much i’m !!!!!! so proud he puts in so much effort and he works so hard and he practices so much fuck i’m emo 

Literally ??? is perfect whatever he says his bad sides are are actually good points smdh 

Was asked once if there was anything he couldn’t do, to which he replied that he wasn’t good at relationships and the MC replied that wtf it just made him more attractive

farewell i am on the floor crying 

oh right okay yes one bad side:

MINIONS 

Smdh he loves them so much

The glasses he wore in the cicada video

that one video of them playing with the minion helicopter

that MINION HAT

160108 DDOCA when they’re playing with the minion blanket and jinjin opens it up and promptly looks horrified  

What the hell is this

European Bagel: once said he was eating an ‘european bagel’ on ok!ready episode 1 if anyone knows what that means pls let us know

He gets anxious about being a burden to astro

Talked about it in Astro Project watch at your own risk I cried

Listen he does so much he juggles acting and photoshoots for CFs and astro promotions he’s constantly trying to improve himself he’s never a burden and if there's one member in all of astro i want to hug and just !! tell him he's okay and that everything will be okay and tell him that he’s perfect and that he’s enough and deserves love it’d be Eunwoo for me ;;;;;;;;

Also Eunwoo: (sits quietly) / 5stro: let’s fuck with him

was playing with the ducks when jinjin and sanha come up behind him and screamed lmao he nearly fell on his face

A compilation or two… or three of Eunwoo being bothered by the other members lolol

Once Jinjin had to pull a secret camera on him and tell him that Astro accidentally broke a camera and without hesitating he offered to pay the full 1.5k$ that camera was worth adsfjkasd what a pure gullible bean ;A;

ICONIC BASEBALL DDOCA THAT SLAYED ALL THE BINU STANS THERE EVER WERE i’m writing this from the grave

Cutest whine? He goes like aaAAa or something like that idk but he does it when he gets annoyed it’s the cutest thing ;;;;;

Literally the (^▽^) face

Mouth opens up into a really wide triangle, width depends on how embarrassed he gets

My favourite laugh in the entire universe

heck I’m so in love,,,

LOVES KIDS 

during one ASC a baby came on and asked all of astro to go to their house to play for christmas eunwoo got out of his seat right away he was 1000% ready to run out of the studio and hop on that airplane

Actually a lil bitch lmao 

“Haha u were going 2 sleep?? Nah stay up & watch me on vlive fam”

Makes fun of hyung line’s height i live for this 

After arohas missed the “MJ” during the first fanchant he joked saying “why don’t y’all just come in on ‘jinjin’ instead?” #LetMJLive2k17 also #LetArohasLive2k17

Voice like moonlight 

Need him singing??? Here

Titles his v-lives “차은우의 Just one 10 minutes” but they’re never 10 minutes they’re nearly an hour long 

His voice is just really really soothing and comforting and if you ever need something to calm you down when you’re upset or if you need a background voice for when you’re studying here he is

Singing voice has improved so so so so so so much from Spring Up, his live singing shakes me to the core

Also sang opera in ASC so really hoo boy he’s improved so much I’m so !!! :’)

Literally can we pause and take a moment to appreciate his baby photos I looked like a rat when I was younger and here he is, snatching, 

My favourite baby ever ajkdlhsfakjsdf i lovE

Did some modelling campaigns pre-debut 

Shara Shara

I bet you needed all these pictures in your life

Cute lotion video :’)

Still king of CFs he recently did a baskin robbins one (with Yoo Seung Ho)

It’s pretty funny

He’s so cute what the heck

After the whole thing, he got addicted to ice cream; he mentioned in a vlive that at some point he could just eat sandwiches and ice cream the whole day

But fantagio also probably feeds all of astro ice cream for breakfast so really,  

A Lafuma ad with Seolhyun (AOA) 

A Polham ad with Doyeon (Weki Meki)

A Ceci spread with Doyeon too!! 

A Lotte Water Park ad with Sejeong (Gugudan)

Won an award for best male CF smdh 

Wears frickin glasses and makes everyone cry 

That one DDOCA where it’s him preparing for a hit the top shooting I would like you to know that this is coming to you from the grave

Got scouted by a Fantagio recruiter when he was in middle school, then bugged into joining the fantz

He was the school president, in the top three of the entire school, wanted Seoul National University to become a judge bless his fuckin heart

Apparently rejected Fantagio the first couple times they asked, but gave in bless him thank god

Astro claimed pre-debut walking anywhere with him meant everyone doing double-takes

Re-enacted on ok!ready: sanha and mj talking in a coffeeshop then stopping and sTARING THE FUCK OUT OF EUNWOO LMAO

Literally blew up on male-dominated sites for being PRETTIER THAN THE FEMALE MCs AT SHOW!MUCORE

So pretty that Hello Venus thought he was prettier than them when starring in their video

Some weibo arohas describe him as the kind of handsome where “even if you’re already married, you’d still take a second glance at him if you passed by him on the street” ("那种虽然有老公了但是对路过的帅哥还是想多看两眼的感觉") I 10000% agree 

weibo arohas also call him "车车" car car / cha cha i'm fuckinjasdfkjdf

In case you wanted a heart attack

Labelled a “Face Genius”, but wants to be acknowledged for more than his looks

“Someone who’s more reliable than anyone else and who always gives his all to the people he treasures, who’s very hard on himself and there are times where it gets too much but because of that, he’s someone who’s detailed and earnest.” (creds to @astrotranslations)

Dony on Weekly Idol called Rowoon (SF9) a face genius once but Rowoon politely deferred and said that title belonged to Cha Eunwoo :’)

Said once in an interview that he’d take whoever he likes out to dinner, give them a necklace then confess asdjfhlaskjd a true romantic bby

Also said that he was an “FM” boyfriend (field manual) asjdhflaksjd my heart is weak don’t attack me like this

You know what, Binu gets a section to themselves smdh 

Just so you know, arohas didn’t come up with the name ‘Binu’, they came up with it (”Team Soap”) themselves 

explained it by saying 빈 (Bin) + 우 (Woo) = 비누 (Soap)

Roommates!!

Picked each other in OK!Ready and have been living in the same room ever since 

in the recent Night Night show they did Eunwoo said that if he could pick roommates again, he’d still pick Bin 

Is apparently scentless to Bin 

Smdh we all know what habituation is it’s bc he smells Eunwoo too much Eunwoo doesn’t have a specific smell anymore

Also together like 24/7 stuck to each other’s side if you’re looking for eunwoo ever just look for bin you’ll find him there

Bin claims Eunwoo is the most beautiful creature on earth tbh same 

“Is he really human? How can someone that looks like him exist?”

Eunwoo thinks Bin is the most handsome too I love supportive friendships ;u;

IS THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN WAKE BIN UP AMAZING

Literally though sanha and jinjin posted a twitter video of them trying to wake bin up it doesn’t work it apparently only works when eunwoo gets him to wake up 

Sleeps through sanha and jinjin prodding him but wakes up when eunwoo starts talking in a vlive

Bin said in the harper’s bazaar interview that he doesn’t wake up when the manager calls him to get up but his eyes naturally open when he hears Eunwoo sighing (creds to @astrotranslations)

Bin’s mom even sent in a concern to hello counsellor bc he wouldn’t stop sleeping and couldn’t wake up so really… eunwoo = magic?

Want more Binu? Here, here and here!

Friends with Mingyu from Seventeen

Mingyu called him once for advice on what to bring to the jungle since he too was going on law of the jungle

Said in Night Night that he gets cold really easily

Yet in OK!Ready (as pointed out by @jinwoostro) he stood outside waiting for Jinjin and Sanha to come even though he was freezing ;u; 

A sweetheart!! Who cares so much !!!! for other members!!!!!!

Listen this boy works so hard and he does so much for a 20 year old: he models, he acts, he’s learning 3 other languages for Aroha, he handles university courses AND he still keeps up with astro’s promotions I’m really crying he’s worked so hard he deserves the world

Im rly fukcing criyng i gotta sotp i love this boy, 

[wazafam]

The lovable Joey Tribbiani had a complex character arc and was often a struggling actor with a few regional credits to his name. It took time, but by the end of Friends, Joey was doing well for himself. He had been nominated for a Soapie Award for his work in Days of Our Lives and co-starred in a World War I movie with famed actor, Richard Crosby (played by Gary Oldman).

RELATED: Friends: 10 Nicest Characters, Ranked

Joey was known mostly for loyalty, trustworthiness, and for valuing friendship more than anything in the world. These character traits and a couple more made him the most iconic person on a show essentially about friendship.

10 Survived In The Challenging Acting Business

Not a single member in the group has a story nearly as dynamic as Joey's. He knew there was more to life than paying bills. So, instead of caving to family pressure and going into his father's pipe-fitting business, Joey pursued the field he was actually passionate about. A struggling actor in New York, he had to work a number of survival jobs before he caught his big break.

Joey worked as a cologne sampler, an acting teacher, Christmas tree salesman, museum tour guide, and briefly as a waiter at the gang's hangout spot, Central Perk. The dry spell didn't seem to bog him down, especially because he had cultivated a strong friendship with Chandler who looked out for him.

9 Compelling Character Arc

Joey's slow transformation is the biggest testament to the strength of his character. He didn’t get to promptly work as an actor but nevertheless persevered. He was home in the middle of the day while his friends were hard at work.

Joey's big break came when he was cast as Dr. Drake Ramoray on Days of Our Lives. The stint however didn't last long because he angered the writers by claiming he made up his own lines.

Joey was able to get his Days of Our Lives part back in season 7 of the show. Thereafter, he was shooting a movie with Richard Crosby and throwing soap opera parties on his roof.

8 Astute Remarks

Chandler may be hailed as the king of sarcasm, but sometimes his witty one-liners paled into insignificance when compared with Joey's astute observations. In "The One with the 'Cuffs," while speaking to an encyclopedia salesman, Joey rightly remarked there were a few things in life that couldn't be learned from books.

RELATED: Friends: 10 Times We Related To Joey

Joey also gave clever pieces of advice to his friends, such as when he reminded them their bosses disliked them because they were hanging out at a coffee shop in the middle of a workday.

In the show's pilot, after seeing Paul the wine guy walk out of Monica's bedroom and apartment, Joey made fans laugh when he sarcastically contradicted Monica's earlier statement by asking, "What the hell do you do on a real date?"

7 The Loved One

Joey was unquestionably the adorable one among the group.

Things would many a time turn sour between the friends. Ross and Rachel's on/off relationship inevitably led to conflict and the first time they split, they couldn't stand being in the same room as each other. Ross angered Chandler by fooling around with his mother. The Chandler himself crossed the line when he kissed Joey's girlfriend behind his back. The brother-sister duo, Monica and Ross either bickered about the latter's constant presence in her apartment or blurted out each other's secrets.

Joey was the least catty person of the six. He kept people's secrets and willingly gave up meat during Phoebe's pregnancy.

6 The Man Behind The Famous Pick-Up Line

When Joey wasn't goofing around with Chandler, drinking coffee at Central Perk, or eating his fill at Monica's, he was spending time with the ladies. Chandler and Ross seemed to have the worst luck with women, whereas Joey was quite the charmer.

According to Joey, he would just look a woman up and down say, "Hey, how you doin'?"

Only Matt LeBlanc's Joey could deliver the line with absolute charm. None of the friends could speak in Joey's cadence, much less be able to bowl people over with the iconic catchphrase.

5 Good At Giving Advice

Joey almost always made sense to his pals, even when he uttered gibberish. A case in point is the 'moo point' moment in “The One where Chandler Doesn’t Like Dogs."

As Rachel sought advice from Monica and Phoebe on whether or not she should make a move on her assistant Tag, Joey gave her good advice.

"All right, Rach. The big question is, "does he like you?" All right? Because if he doesn't like you, this is all a moo point," he told her.

Though for a short while the girls look bewildered, it made some sense when Joey explained what a moo point actually was.

“It’s like a cow’s opinion. You know. It just doesn’t matter. It’s moo.”

RELATED: Friends: 10 Times Joey Proved He Wasn't So Dumb After All

However bizarre the word 'moo' may have sounded, even Rachel had to admit it made sense not to waste any efforts over a person who didn't like her back.

4 Most Selfless Friend

Joey would oftentimes go out of his way to make life better for all of his friends. He showed genuine concern for Rachel and Phoebe upon hearing they were to become single parents. Without any hesitation, he offered them marriage saying people who shared special bonds could marry to raise a child together.

Joey put his feelings aside to let Chandler date Kathy. He also covered for Chandler and Monica at the expense of his reputation for a long time. Admittedly, it made him look like an idiot but he did everything he could (including shaving his legs) only because his friends weren't ready to make their relationship public.

3 A Truly Good Person

Joey was a good human being, as he was compassionate and empathetic towards the people around him. In "The One with The Birth," he offered his support to a single pregnant woman while she delivered her baby.

Although Joey was forced into becoming Treeger's dancing partner in "The One with the Ballroom Dancing," he eventually came around and started to enjoy it too.

The defining features of Joey's character were treating people with kindness and warmth.

2 The Famous One

As Friends reached its conclusion, the gangs' respective careers panned out the way they wanted or hoped to. Joey's path wasn't nearly as smooth, and he had his fair share of struggles. But the fact remains, no one amongst a group of well-educated adults ended up becoming famous like him.

Because Joey was in the acting business, a great number of people knew about him. He was once the three-down clue for a crossword puzzle in the Soap Opera Digest, earned a Soapie nomination, and rightly called himself a soap opera star before lending $2000 to Monica in, "The One With the Boob Job."

1 Officiated Two Weddings

Monica and Chandler couldn't have found a better minister than Joey to officiate their wedding. On the day of the wedding, Joey had a full plate but managed to arrive just in time to lead the wedding ceremony. He kept the officiant speech sweet and told a room full of people he couldn't imagine two people more perfect for each other.

Joey also performed Phoebe and Mike’s ceremony. Earlier, she'd asked him to walk her down the aisle but seeing that their minster was snowed-in, he offered to officiate.

The fact that Joey performed two of his closest friends' weddings proves his friendship was important to them.

NEXT: Friends: 10 Things Even Diehard Fans Didn't Know About Joey

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