#also I apologise for tagging - I tag posts for later access on my own blog and I sometimes forget it’s how other people find content

[algrenion]

that person said you were racist on your wyll post because ppl who dont even bother to properly interact or understand his character will post the worst takes in his tag and then go "oh oops i didnt mean to be racist 🥺 i was just complaining abt the only black character that i didnt bother to learn anything about"

wyll is nothing like a tory hes self sacrificing, unspoiled and the only character who actually stands up for other groups of ppl in game (even having a line saying a disabled character is not worthless for being disabled!!) and even if you meant it as a "rich spoiled kid" way, did you really not think of the other implications of calling the only black man in the group a tory...

i get it you didnt mean to say it in any bad way but it came across that way regardless of intention especially since wyll already gets so much undeserved flack and in his own tag from people who admit they know nothing abt his character, so

Okay, I understand why the post has been received badly and in that case I’ll delete it. I don’t want to actively upset anyone.

That said I would like to add that I’m very aware of Wyll’s background and character traits and in fact I find them insanely relatable; I am also a black (albeit extremely white passing - but my connections with the black community almost entirely stem from racism I’ve experienced merely for the knowledge of me having a black father), disabled woman, and I’ve suffered pretty tremendously at times, under Tory leadership for that. I’ve even got well to do family who I’ve drifted away from — his story is extremely relatable.

I’m also very familiar with the colloquial use of the word “Tory” as a light jab, usually referring to people that sound posh. I get called it all the time by my friends, it’s ironic, we laugh about it. And I think that regardless of Wyll’s extremely positive traits and background as a character, you’d be hard pressed to deny he has the flavour of a rich kid. I think Larian purposely wrote him that way, and that’s not a bad trait, just something I find humour in. I’m not saying he is “like a Tory” in any other sense than speech and body language.

Of course, that is only my experience and my opinion. I just don’t think it’s that serious or that any racist implications were in my post.

Knowing how some people react with real bigotry toward Wyll though, sometimes at a very subconscious level, I think I’ll remove the post to avoid any doubt. Just wanted to make my intentions clear first, though it sounds like you kind of understood them anyway.

I hope I covered that okay, I just woke up and I’ve not had my pain meds yet, so

[adziedoodle]

Dan’s video, my mistakes, my apology, moving forward

---

Firstly, i love dan so much omg - i wrote my tweet here expressing all that love - but of course, more importantly, i’m so so happy and proud for him for coming out as queer!!! as well as phil’s tweet rt quoting dan’s video!! what a babe!!

---

I know to some it may seem like a chance for me to go ‘ahahaha we been knew’ or ‘I told you sooooo!!!’ but as Dan said in his video, and as I have learnt over the years, to say such would be to disrespect the person coming out and their personal journey. 

To add to this, I also feel the need to say that I am very sorry for my behaviour and words that came with it a few years back on this blog when I was in my Peak phandom/phannie phase (it’s not really a phase, it’s just changed over time).  To explain, during that time I had a ‘bi!dan’ tag (and i think another one along the lines of ‘queer yt’ as well as ‘whatphan’) a few years ago in which I would frequently speculate, or regrettably use the term ‘headcanon’, dan (and phil)’s sexuality and make assumptions about the relationship for various reasons that I’ve learnt now don’t really justify why I felt the need to. I’d argue, it gets a little tricky to separate the irl person from the person we see in the videos, especially when you grow up watching them like their a cartoon character, but I’ll also admit, I certainly got carried away with my idea of Dan (and Phil) and not always thinking properly of them as complex people with complex lives with complex sexualities to boot! It was wrong of my to slap a label on Dan, even if I had my reasons I thought at the time were... reasonable.

I just want to clarify, even before dan’s video he posted today, that I have learnt that I shouldn’t have been so publicly vocal in regards to speculating dan’s (or anyone’s) sexuality. It wasn’t right then or now tbh and as someone who is gay/queer myself and had times of being scared to be so, I really should’ve known better and listened to my own preachings of ‘your words have impact’.

I don’t want to believe that I crossed as many privacy boundaries as some folks, I only came across bread crumbs those folks had left behind, but even then, it’s easy to put myself up higher and be like ‘I’m not thaaaat bad’. Now, I acknowledge that I still went too far in a lot of ways and certainly put my own feelings, desperation, curiosities and need to project first before Dan (or anyone else in his position of not being out). I am sincerely sorry for this and any negative impact my words in the past may have had on him (or anyone). I’ve learned to be better and hopefully have acted out to be so. I only say ‘may’ here because I don’t think I’ll ever be sure if he saw any of my posts specifically , but I still want to apologise.

That all being said, I’m not gonna delete my tag(s) (that I later changed to ‘dan likes boys’) because i feel like that would be pretty suspicious like I was sweeping it under the rug. This blog is a big record of me growing up from as young as 15 (I’m nearly 23 now!) and as much as it scares me, I don’t want to erase that, even the parts that don’t highlight me in the best way. I want to be honest and acknowledge my mistakes so people can learn from them. Please, if you come across posts in the tags I’ve mentioned that rub you the wrong way, take it with a pinch of salt as this is me apologising for writing without thinking and getting so carried away. Also, I don’t really wanna mention it here but this isn’t about ‘phan’ and I’m not sorry for my phan art because D+P have expressed that is all okay multiple times (and even partook themselves with fanfic in TABINOF / TATINOF ahah), I haven’t cared about ‘shipping’ them in forever, to me they are just as Dan expressed because (now) it’s from the source himself (well, quoted on someone else’s twitter ahah but my point stands). I’m also not sorry for like, seeing a part of myself in Dan and Phil, as well as their relationship resonating with me and reminding me of my own- with people I consider soulmates (i agree with this basically) - I’m just sorry how I went about it all and how that potentially hurt Dan.

In the end, I stand where I have since I first started watching them in 2009 - these thoughts and feelings fuelled a lot of my past behaviours but I’ve learnt to think before doing and embrace it on my own or in more private spaces but it’ll still consolidate and make a cool conclusion here: 

I’ve felt a connection to Dan, Phil and their lovely relationship - whatever it is to them -, and while I’m overwhelmingly happy that connection has been further validated with Dan’s video and Phil’s tweet afterwords, what matters most, especially now, is that they are in a position where they can feel happiness, pride and just contentment in themselves and each other (even if things aren’t perfect 100% of the time). They don’t need protecting from something that’s a part of who they are. They are also allowed to be private about that same something though. 

They’ve given me so so much joy, pride in being different, access to a incredible passionate community (and will likely continue to over the years), especially today so really it’s only fair they feel all the things they’ve given me (and literally MILLIONS OF OTHERS !!!) for 10 years :’) 

I love Dan and Phil and this honestly feels like a new era where we’re all grown up/learning to grow more! Here’s to being better, making progress, living our truths and !!! being queer !!!

[modesty-blaise]

Since I'm curious, what caused you to become very possessive of your gifs? Not out of rudeness but curious, since no matter what you do a lot of them show up in the gif function on Tumblr which automatically credits you at the bottom of the gif.

Hey. Tbh, at first I didn’t wanna bother with yet another anon but since I see no ill intent behind this, I decided to go and answer it. Unfortunately, half-way through I realised my reply is turning into incredibly long semi-bitter rant and expands well beyond calling out just one person in Psychonauts fandom (and yes, this is related to Psychonauts fandom – you do know that these anons are not really that anonymous, right?) so… buckle up! All that beneath “read more”.

I’ve been on this hellsite for like…7-8 years? Maybe more? Can’t really tell cause I moved blogs and my old blog now consists of only 4 posts I’ve made close to leaving so I honestly have no idea how much time I’ve spend here before moving. Anyway, during those few years I’ve spent on my first blog I’ve met a lot of creative gifmakers who enjoyed sharing their love for fandoms they were in. I’d like to point out that this was waaaaay before tumblr created that insert-gif option so, back in the day, the only way to add gifs to your post was to: 1. make them yourself 2. take them from someone else. And a lot of people were taking them from someone else which resulted in many gifmakers giving up on making gifs and leaving fandoms and/or even leaving tumblr – and I’ve had many of my friends give up on what they love and have their games/shows/movies/whatnot ruined for them cause people would not stop stealing from them. And many of my friends eventually left tumblr cause they couldn’t deal with it anymore.

Tumblr adding insert-gif option, in my opinion, honestly, just made it worse for gifmakers. Cause now people had the opportunity to use gifs for their posts, with or without creators’ permission/knowledge, but it was alright and it was perfectly fine cause creators were credited. There’s their name at the bottom. It’s alright. Like… it doesn’t matter if they’re actually okay with people using something they’ve put hours into making or if they’re not – tumblr gives them credit so they SHOULD be okay with it. Simple as that.

Well, we’re all different and some people are not okay with that. I’m not okay with that. It took me weeks to figure out how to use photoshop correctly. Took me countless hours of looking through different tutorials and basically trial-and-error-ing my way through the process. Whenever I make gifs, it takes me hours to record videos and then hours trying to achieve that 3mb limit on gifs (thank lord these days we’re beyond 1mb limit). After all that effort I put into creating gifs for games that I love and enjoy, someone is going to make 2 clicks and have that same gif added to their post, without even asking. So how is that okay?

Back to your question. Yes, “no matter what you do a lot of them show up in the gif function on Tumblr”, that is true and that is something I was aware of when I saw you-know-who announcing they would be starting 30 days Psychonauts challenge. So, hating to see my gifs used against my will, and not wanting to start any unnecessary drama and threaten people in advance with reporting them if they do use them, I’ve made my blog as private as I could. It was only accessible through the dashboard, it was not showing in ANY search engines inside and outside tumblr, and my gifs were impossible to find through insert-gif function – I’ve made sure. I did all that cause I just knew that during those 30 days, someone would use my gifs and I would get mad and I desperately wanted to avoid that (hence going extreme). And you know what happened? You know what creator of this challenge (who prevously already reposted my gifs) did? *drums* They used my shit anyway. :3 They just uploaded it from their computer, where they’ve saved it earlier.

And like… a lot of people see pretty pic and decide to save it - I mean, we all do that. Heck, even I have a folder full of shit I saw online and liked it – but i’m not uploading it online cause I haven’t made it. It’s not mine to share.

But some people are not like that.

Some people see fanart of something they like and they want to share their opinion on it – and instead of making their own post, maybe drawing the fanart themselves, they decide to use someone else’s art for their post. Do they know who made it? Do they have creator’s permission to share it? If the answer is NO, then they should be a decent human being and not do that to creators. Oh, they shared it anyway but now people in fandom are calling them out BUT this actually happened on accident? They know who the creator is but, somehow, they accidentally forgot to credit them? OK, well, it’s possible, shit happens, but they better make sure it doesn’t happen again.

Then sometime later these same people decide they want to make a post appreciating their fav character and they want to include pics cause duh, you can’t have character appreciation post without pics, right? Now they have several options: they can get their own screenshots, make their own gifs, maybe draw something… or they can just take someone else’s creation. Do they know who made it? Well there’s my fuckin name on it, and since they’ve stretched it from 245 to 500px, it’s really hard to miss, plus it’s not like there are that many people making Psychonauts gifs. Do they have permission to share it? Hmmm, nope, didn’t ask me. Is this also an accident? Could be. I mean, I’ve seen stranger things happen, so accidentally forgetting to credit content creators twice… kinda suspicious but still possible. Who am I to say?

Now if these people then decide to make a post appreciating their fav ship and they want to add a cute pic of the loving couple – yup, you guessed it! They can either create something or take something. Again: they know who did? They asked for permission? Got the permission? No?!?! But they posted it anyway?!?! :o Could it really be, that after being called out publicly, after being told that reposting is bad (something that’s very easy to understand), after even having tumblr staff intervene and remove stolen shit from their blog, after all that - could it really still be an accident?

Nah, man.

They just don’t give a shit.

Cause if they did, they’d stop with that crap first time they were called out.

(and if you think Psychonauts fandom is their only fandom and that they’re not doing this crap in other fandoms too - hoooo, boy, do I have some bad news for you! Do you know how many stolen and butchered HP fanart is on their blog? Hobbit stuff? They seem to be one of the most accident-prone users on tumblr. And honestly - it’s a real miracle their blog’s not been terminated.)

Back to what I was talking about - I’m not okay with people using my gifs and I’ve made it very clear. I literally do not give a shit if I’m credited or not, I’ve made it very clear that I don’t want my gifs used without my permission. If you like them and want them on your blog, there’s a fuckin reblog button. It’s sole purpose is to allow you to share other people’s creations. Or shitposts, cause lord knows we all love those.

So that’s why when someone spends hours going through my Psychonauts tag and goes as far as to send me “I love your gifs” anonymous message, but the very next day makes stim moodboard post including one of my gifs, now cut and resized to fit 3x3 format they’re going with, I get mad. And that’s why when someone uses one of my gifs to promote their RP blog, butchering it to fit their aesthetics, and later when confronted going as far as blaming their good friend on it cause god! they’ve had no idea it wasn’t theirs, I get mad. (makes you wonder though: if they friend has such skills, why not making them gifs themselves?)

Like…. I’ve had my gifs stolen plenty of times. I’ve had them stolen for roleplaying, for headers, for imagines, just for notes… I’ve had them stolen by people claiming to run official fan sites (that’s a real wild story but I won’t get into that now)… I’ve seen them on pinterest, weheartit, FB, all those random gif sites… and I’ve seen EVERY. POSSIBLE. EXCUSE. ranging from: “well i found it on google so why should i credit you” “lol dunno who made this but its pretty so im posting it” “ive had it on my computer for years so i don’t remember where i got it from” “i dont know how to make gifs so im using weheartit as a source” “credit to whoever made this” (that’s my fav) to “its just a gif so who gives a shit” (it’s not – it’s hours of creator’s time and lots of love that you’re now shitting on so thanks) and “i have an /illness/ and getting notes makes me feel better so dont u dare blame me for stealing” (I don’t remember exact excuse but it was something along those lines and like… how do you even respond to something that without looking like an asshole?).

And sometimes it really is just an accident. Sometimes people really do forget to credit you and/or ask you for permission. And I’ve had my fair share of those accidents. People in Psychonauts fandom have been using my gifs for various crap but, when approached, they’ve removed it and apologised. And it’s something I really appreciate. (if they actually bother reading this and they recognise themselves: i’m really grateful and thank you for not being an ass)

But you know what I don’t appreciate? People making a call out posts about me, asking about my gifs when they know very well they’re the main reasons why I’m not making those gifs anymore, at the same time failing to address any of the issues I have with them and instead rather explaining to others what happened BUT explaining only the parts that make me look like a villain cause how I even dare be mad about them stealing? How I even dare call them out on it? That is so ridiculous and criminal of me, and it’s so so sooooo bad that they need to call me out. I deserve to be called out by the very same person who’s been stealing my shit.

And their explanation is…well… it’s something.

They were sympathetic and polite? When did this happen? Did I completely missed that part? Please someone fuckin enlighten me with such post/message where they expressed their sympathy and politeness and I’ll apologise right this second.

I told them to “literally fuck off”? Yeah, that did happen, I admit that. Did they bother explaining why I told them to fuck off in the first place? Did they say they were caught stealing from me and had tumblr stuff remove my shit from their blog? Did they get into details of how they demanded the proof of my so very wild and obviously false claims but then when I showed it, they just deleted that “how dare u call me out cause I would never do such thing” post? No, they didn’t and geee, I really wonder why.

Instead, what did they choose to address? Out of all the things I’ve said. Hm? What did they choose? Me telling them to fuck off. Me dropping the F-bomb on them, rudely rejecting their obvious kindness and politeness. Nothing else.

Back to what I was talking about before I got derailed again: no, I’m not mad cause this person used my gifs without crediting me. I mean – I am, but that’s not my main issue with them (and they know it). My main issue is that this is someone who will continuously lie and steal and still deny any of it, even when there’s plenty of proof (and you can always count on me to show up with proof tbh), and then go as far as to publicly ask about my gifs and try to call me out. Like me getting mad that something I’ve put hours of work into, and something I’ve made cause I love the game and I want to share my love and appreciation for it, is now being shared against my will and my knowledge - like me getting mad over something like that is so unreasonable that they need to make an entire post about it while pretending they have absolutely no idea why I’m even mad and why we have issues.

And I have every fucking right to be mad. 3 times is not an accident. 2 times to the same person is not an accident. They know it. But yeah, playing stupid is their defense so it’s not like I expected them to actually address their actions this time either.

And you know what? Just because I swear a lot doesn’t mean I’m wrong. Doesn’t mean there’s no solid ground for my claims. People on tumblr have always been and always will be stealing shit. Sometimes they will credit you, often they will not, and that’s just how it is, doesn’t matter if you’re okay with it or not. But that doesn’t mean I’m just gonna sit quiet and accept someone’s shitty behaviour. Especially when it’s directed at me.

TLDR: giving credit =/= having permission

but my previous posts leading to this ask were not about that

you knew that already

[stimtoybox]

Announcements

Hello, lovely followers! I know I haven’t been around much, and I apologise. I’ve spent much of the last month struggling with treatments for my shoulder pain, trying to redesign my website and publishing two short stories, and I really haven’t had spoons for much of anything else.

This blog is now a little over a year old, and I’ve had to reassess how things work, as I keep running up against two evident truths. The first is that lots of wonderful people have offered to help with the describing but find their own lives keep getting in the way, meaning I can’t rely on someone else to help out. The second is that I cannot myself keep up with the workload of this blog as is and ever hope to get back to answering asks. Not with my pain as severe as it has been the last five months, not if I’d like to do anything else that isn’t this blog. I’ve had treatments for my new shoulder injury and they haven’t worked at all, so I can only assume it is going to be yet another ongoing chronic pain site, one I’ve gained from my work on this blog.

To describe and format three posts a day, often not even an hour’s work, is often beyond me if I’d also like to work on my own writing, message a friend or post to my personal blog. To do so much here, in the first half of this year, I was sacrificing my ability to talk to my friends, to express myself on my website and in my fiction. This blog wasn’t a full time job, but I am disabled enough that even a part-time job isn’t in my capability, and I don’t think it coincidental that the first seven months of this blog have been followed by the last five--in which my pain has been more severe than at any time in the last five years.

I have said several times in various places that I am understanding of people who cannot add descriptions to their posts from disability, but the truth I need to accept is that I am one of those people. The quest to be accessible for others, by providing image descriptions or links or additional information, all things I believe that should be part of a post (in order to make the content as easy to access as possible, especially for disabled and non-US/international stimmers) is damaging me. While this blog and its community has been good for my mind, it’s been disastrous on my body.

The experiment with bringing mods onto the blog hasn’t helped me long term. I am still left doing everything myself, struggling to keep enough of a queue going so that the blog isn’t entirely depleted should my pain be worse than it is. I am so grateful that so many people have offered to help, but they have their own lives. This blog is mine, my creation; I’m the only one who can’t abandon it when life calls.

So I need to make it easier for me to manage.

Changes I will be making include:

This blog will once again be a one person blog. All posts made by previous mods will remain tagged as such, and I’ll make an archive page for their bios and information so they can get the recognition they deserve--especially for CD, who has put an awful lot of effort into helping out on this blog.

Unless it is an easy post for me to do or I feel like it, I am no longer adding image descriptions, links or descriptive information to other people’s posts. This includes asks and submissions. As much as I wish content to be accessible, I am too disabled to add this information to other people’s posts if I wish to do things for myself.

Unless it is easy for me to do or I feel like it, I will not be responding to ask requests to hunt down or find particular stim toys. These posts, as they involve a lot of link hunting, are the hardest for me to do when I struggle with using a computer mouse and are even more difficult to do on a tablet in terms of copying links into a post. I physically cannot cope with these kinds of posts.

I haven’t been able to maintain the tags pages for a long time, and I won’t be continuing with this. They’ll remain up for anyone wishing to use them as a resource, but I won’t be adding new content to them. It just requires far too much mouse work for me to cope with.

I have opened up the ask box again. However, I want to make it clear that I won’t be answering asks in any particular order save for “easiest for me”, I will delete without notification those I cannot answer (I just do not have the spoons to reply to everyone saying that I cannot answer) and if I once again get to the point of getting ten asks a day, there is a very good chance most of those will go unanswered. I won’t be answering more than one or two asks a day.

(I have noticed that many stim blogs I used to reblog from are infrequent, inactive or deleted, so later this week I will put up a post asking folks to recommend good stim blogs as a resource, as this will help give folks somewhere to ask if I cannot answer their questions.)

I have also gone through the inbox and deleted everything that isn’t a submission or review (which will all be queued today). Apologies for those whose questions went unanswered, but they have been there a long time and I would like to start the new year afresh without the pressure of having to go through everything there. If you’d like to resend your ask, please do so.

Thank you to everyone who has taken the time to read through this monster of a post, and thank you, so much, to the fabulous followers who have supported this blog with your follows, likes, reblogs, asks and submissions. I have been struggling to respond for so long now, but I truly appreciate your interactions.

I would also like to name @e456bluetoo, who I believe has liked every single post on this blog--something special and amazing I do not wish to take for granted. Thank you so very much--little things like this keep me going and I am so grateful!

- Mod K.A.

[lovenotesuggestions]

In response to the rather unsavoury anon ask I just received:

This blog runs on a queue, and that includes answering asks - this is no big secret; I’ve mentioned it before on this blog and the majority of my answered asks have my queue tag on them. I sometimes get in excess of a dozen asks a day, and I endeavour to answer all of them to the best of my ability, but it takes time and effort and I’m the only admin of this blog. Answered asks go into my queue to post 5 per day to avoid spamming my followers with asks - I tend to answer asks in one big chunk and I want to alternate them with other content, and I also don’t want to clog up people’s dashes. But queueing asks also gives me some leeway if I don’t have the time or the energy some days to answer asks or to write long responses to people asking for advice - instead of feeling pressured to answer all of the asks I receive straight away, I have some time as my queue runs down to think about what I want to say in response, especially for people asking for advice, and to give myself a break if I simply don’t have the time or the motivation to spend an hour answering all the asks the day I receive them. 

Because of the high volume of asks I get, it does take a while for them to come out of the queue - sometimes two weeks or so depending on how many asks I’ve gotten recently. I answer 99% of the asks I get, so if you haven’t had a response yet, it’s likely that your ask is queued and will be posted shortly. 

Because of this, if you have something urgent you want a response to promptly, let me know in the ask itself, or message me privately. I appreciate that some asks will be time-sensitive and I will do my best to accommodate that, but there’s no way for me to know unless you tell me!! I promise I will not see it as being needy or pushy or anything like that. If I know your question can’t wait the week or two it sometimes takes for asks to come back out of the queue, I will prioritise answering the ask and post it as soon as I answer it, rather than queueing it. Or if you private message me, I can just respond instantly as I pretty much always have access to tumblr messenger (except obviously when I’m at work or asleep or something - my timezone is GMT, so if I don’t respond right away I’m probably sleeping or at work/studying but I’ll respond as soon as I have time). This way you may also be able to give more details and have a more in-depth conversation about whatever it is that’s bothering you.

If you’ve sent an ask already, and you decide later that it is urgent and you need a prompt response, you don’t have to re-send the question - I almost certainly got the ask, it’s just in my queue, and duplicate questions from the same person just makes more work for me (I don’t mind answering similar questions to things I’ve answered before from different people though!). Instead, send me an ask summarising what it was you talked to me about before, and let me know that it’s becoming urgent, and I’ll publish your original ask right away.  You can also feel free to ask me for an update on the status of your ask, or if it’s been a while and it hasn’t been posted, I don’t mind if you want to double check I got the ask - tumblr has been known to eat them and I’m really sorry if any asks people have sent never got through to me. 

The wrong way to handle it is sending me an ask saying “are you ever gonna answer my damn question.” For one, I have no way of knowing which question as yours in the first place from that ask. But also this blog is something I do for fun, a place to write down the cheesy thoughts I have for the person I love. I never expected to get anywhere near this number of followers and this amount of attention, and I have been stunned and overwhelmed by the wonderful response I’ve had from people who want to share that with me. I love to hear about your crushes and significant others and to see people tagging or talking about the people they love on my posts, and it makes me feel good to hear that the perspective I can give on people’s dilemmas has helped them to work things out. But this blog is, at the end of the day, my own, and running it is something I do because I enjoy it - I don’t owe anyone anything and this isn’t my profession, and I have no obligation to answer asks, but I do it because I love interacting with my followers and doing my best to help any way I can. Sending angry and entitled asks isn’t the best way to ensure I continue to love doing it. 

Tl;DR: Most of the asks I receive are queued, and can take up to two weeks or so to be published depending on the volume of asks I receive. I appreciate some questions may be time-sensitive, so if your question is urgent, please let me know, and I will prioritise answering it and publish it right away rather than queueing it. Alternatively, you can message me directly. 

I apologise for this rant. Thank you to all of my wonderful followers for being so supportive of this little blog of mine, it’s been mind-blowing and more than I could ever have dared to hope for, and it’s made running this blog more rewarding than I ever could have imagined. I hope you have a wonderful day 💛

[tobyprada651-blog]

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Open up communication is actually a need to as well as this is actually commonly the most awful going out with blunder you could produce. You can additionally hear files that will definitely confirm just how creative these identification burglars have ended up being that they also utilize modern technology to simply gather private information without a hitch. Otherwise, if the illegal offender may verify that the oversight sensibly quashed a component from the criminal activity, the defense will usually be pursued absolve the defendant and use of obligation. Regarding the Writer: Mike Clover is the proprietor from is one of the absolute most unique on the internet information completely free credit rating documents, Web identity theft software, protected credit cards, and a BLOG POST with a wealth from private credit rating details. Little ones who are afraid discipline or the loss from love in feedback to their mistakes discover how to conceal their oversights. The only mistake that may definitely harm you is deciding to don't do anything merely since you're also afraid making an error. If you may take care of to avoid making any of these five mistakes described above, you'll be actually well installed to win back your ex-boyfriend boyfriend's soul ... as well as rebuild a satisfied, caring connection that will definitely stand up the test of time. However, one of the biggest explanations we restrict ourselves off new experiences is because-- although our team've all brought in and also survived plenty of of them-- our experts hate blunders. Error pertains to a wrong activity, opinion, or judgment; that may additionally advise an improper understanding, impression, or analysis: an oversight in arithmetic; That was actually an oversight to reputable them. Blunder 1: Certainly not featuring stamina instruction in your workout session - All frequently, people incline cardio type workout like strolling, running, biking etc and reject toughness instruction. When the parties to an agreement are actually each wrong about the very same content reality within their agreement, a shared error happens. If you beloved this post and you would like to receive additional data relating to yellow pages uk jobs (click the following post) kindly check out our web-site. A wonderful perk of slipping up is that you will certainly discover one thing you didn't recognize previously, and possibly you can use this session in your future. I am actually uncertain that the choices I made as procedures supervisor of the Orbital Maneuvering Car (OMV) plan almost three years earlier were actually essentially errors, but the issues that ultimately got rid of the OMV were absolutely real. Tagging yourself as someone that is actually regularly creating blunders accidents mayhem on an individual's confidence. Through learning exactly what these oversights are actually, you could rapidly put them responsible for you and get on track to seeing much better results. Youngsters that are truthful as well as think fine concerning correcting an error rarely condemn others. To determine our own selves for our blunders is to make yet one more blunder, accordinged to the 1st, and after that reinforce that. This is this self-condemning process which must be actually put aside to ensure that our experts may get the absolute most benefit from our every error. BLUNDER 8: Utilizing Dark Hat Search Engine Optimisation Techniques- Improving your search engine optimisation by means of secrets and immoral procedures would certainly certainly not aid you for long. Unilateral blunder (where one event is mistaken as well as the various other recognizes or even should have actually known from the blunder). These mistakes may effectively impede your ability making a new and also boosted you." to stop yourself coming from producing these popular dress for gratification blunders, you'll intend to carry on keeping reading. Much like audios that lead a vehicle driver to think that fixings remain in necessity, there are going to be dubious sounds produced combined with the put in of the inappropriate model year components. The 3rd popular car fixing oversight auto managers make is actually certainly not being actually accessible for conversation with the technician worrying the repair service method. Poor choices or even flawed methods can easily often cause oversights, but that does not mean that every poor result is a blunder. Instead of splashing around on the blunder you've made, focus on exactly what you can do to fix the issue. This is all important as well as ought to be actually properly considered when designing an instruction plan exclusively made for you, and also as your body system and bodily problem changes therefore ought to your course. The list may continue. Nonetheless, my expertise as a card-carrying member of the POPULAR CULTURE brings me to the verdict that the ideal mistake is actually the synthetic . Permit yourself to fantasize and assume big, attempt one thing worthwhile, make lots from blunders along the way-- and fill your knowledge container to the verge! Many individuals fear to even have a handful of small risks because they may activate an error." So they don't try everything brand new. There are catastrophic mistakes that ruin a concept; however there are additionally dependent ones, which work in testing the stability from an idea. Your next action is actually to see just what you need to have to carry out in order to patch factors up and also treat your error when you have actually made your apologies to the others involved. It's the exact reason that mistakes hurt, so that our experts perform profit from them and do not make all of them continuously. Both Gergen and also Schoemaker highlight that several employers look for people which came as well as brought in errors out ahead of time. Know-how being actually to be had merely from obvious as well as particular fact, mistake is not a mistake from our expertise, but a mistake from our judgment, providing acceptance to that which is certainly not accurate. Every terrific oversight has a halfway second, an instant when that can be remembered as well as perhaps treated. The complication along with criticizing other people for our blunder is that our team will go through the pain and also repercussions from our error, however will not gain from it, consequently bingo! Describing in a non-defensive method what led to the blunder could aid individuals a lot better recognize why that took place and how you can prevent that in the future. Error # 4)) No Dating Funnel: A man approaches a female, customers a smart opener, get's her contact number, contacts her a few times later on, he puts together a 1st day and then they go out. Watch that you carry out not deliver a severe consequence for a mistake that was actually provided beneficial effort. Slip up refers to a small blunder in speech or creating, or to a minor indiscretion: I misspelled his name through a lapse of the pen. For many years I helped make some adventures along with different assesses and other types of strings that I intend to show to you. There is actually a lot of I am actually ALRIGHT, you are actually OKAY, blunders are actually OKAY" speak on the market in both the business and also self-help globe. Parents which increase their kids to be fearful of miscalculating could frequently viewing criticizing as a response to the error.

[stimtoybox]

Do you have any advice for someone who wants to start a stim/fidget toy review blog? I think it will give me a good outlet to talk about them instead of bothering my friends every time I get a new stimmy thing. I just don't know where to start. :(

I am flattered, anon, that you think we can offer advice on this point!

To be honest, I don’t think it’s that much different from starting any creative project, and these are all things folks should consider if they’re doing anything new. So ask yourself these questions, as they’ll guide you, I think, towards what you do next and how you do it.

I apologise for writing … well, an essay on blogging. It’s probably a great deal more than what you’ve asked for, but I’ve learnt a great deal in running this blog, and it all came flooding out on the page.

The main points, I think, I’ll summarise here before going into everything under the cut:

Know what it is you want to do and why you want to do it. It’s very hard to keep going with anything if you’re not sure why you’re doing it.

Hold close to your heart everything you think you can bring to your blog and reviews, because cherishing your own uniqueness keeps you going.

Practice self-care in determining what is possible for you and how much time you can devote to a blog. Look after yourself first. Your followers will wait even longer for responses if you have a mental breakdown.

Blog only if it makes you happy, because blogging is a lot of work!

Regular and consistent updates do result in regular followers and interactions, but the expectation that one updates regularly and consistently is based on ableist assumptions of ability, so you are allowed to be inconsistent.

Practice gratitude for the people who interact with you.

Don’t feel you ever have to take hate or abuse: you are allowed to use the block button.

Do not ever feel as though you need to know everything about your subject before blogging, because your followers like being able to help you.

If you’re comfortable sharing your blog with us, anon, when you have it ready to go, I’d love to see it. No such thing as too much stimmy information or too many stim blogs; we’re all part of a much greater (and fabulous) community working together to help and share information and discussion about a special interest/hyperfixation/passion. That’s a fabulously awesome thing, and I love all the connections with others - something I’m generally terrible at - I’ve made through this blog.

So, if you’re comfortable, come join us in our little network of stimmers, because we want you to be part of it!

What is it you want to do? What is it you don’t want to do?

Do you just want to post your own reviews? Do you want to post/reblog links to cool toys you’ve found? Do you just want to post/reblog photos of toy collections without reviews or listing information? Do you want to do a mix of toys and online stimming videos/GIFs/ASMR? Tutorials? For example, I don’t enjoy videos or GIFs, so I knew this blog would be about toys, and as I like making things, tutorials just happened naturally. Have a think about the kind of content you want to include and focus on that.

You can always widen your focus afterwards, but having a focus in the beginning helps give you direction, and direction is important.

(Additionally, as your blow grows, your followers might push your blog in all sorts of different directions!)

Why is it you want to do it?

Just wanting somewhere to put your thoughts is a good and valid reason! In the case of this blog, I wanted that, but I also wanted to discuss stim toys with a greater international focus. I know it seems odd now, but when I started this blog few stim toy bloggers were listing currencies, discussing shipping costs or providing image descriptions. There were few listings that weren’t focused on US webstores and absolutely nothing about Australian resources. I saw a gap in what was being covered by others, based on my own needs as a stimmer, and jumped right in.

Knowing why you want to do something helps tailor your approach: it gives you that little bit of uniqueness that separates your blog from other blogs. It erases that doubt that surfaces when you wonder why you’re doing this when everyone else is doing this already. There will be something you’re doing that the rest of us aren’t, and if you find that and hold onto it, it’s a lot easier to keep going.

What makes you happy?

What do you enjoy doing? Writing? Photography? Talking about little details? Making GIFs? Collecting listings of cool items you’ve seen online?

Find out what it is you think you’ll enjoy most and focus, at least in the beginning, on that. Happiness is incredibly motivating.

What lies within your ability?

Anon, take it from someone who repeatedly and reliably fails at this point: figure out what it is you can’t do in the matter of a stim blog and push it aside. You do not have to do everything on your blog. If there is something you genuinely cannot do, don’t do it. This is especially important for disabled bloggers, as we generally have limitations in what we can do and how much. Don’t be like me, trying to do everything because it’s good to do without any awareness of how much Trying To Do Everything is breaking me.

There’s a line between Things That Are Good To Do and Things I Can Actually Do, and you’ll be saner and happier (as someone who is regularly driving myself up the wall with my habit of overestimating my ability to function) if you stay on the “actually possible” side of the line.

Things to look at here include physical ability and time for working on this blog, both of which are super important to evaluate. Always underestimate your ability to do things - you’d rather have extra time and spoons than not enough of it!

I’ll acknowledge that regular, consistent updates are probably the biggest thing when it comes to growing a following, but for disabled people this is a very hard thing to do, and all the “how to blog” advice posts never mention this. The goal of consistency is deeply ableist. If you can do this, great. If you can’t? Don’t bother about it. Updating sporadically is better than being burnt out and not updating at all for six months because you’ve set yourself a punishing schedule your life and body won’t allow you to manage.

How are you going to do it?

You know what you want to say and why; the next step is how. How are you going to format your blog? Possible questions to consider include:

Do you want to write short or long reviews?

Do you want to include photos, videos, GIFs?

Do you want to casually talk about your purchases or aim to be a resource?

Do you want to tag everything as an archive? (This is so the thing where I have bitten off more than I can chew, ye gods.)

Do you want to make your content as accessible as you can?

Do you want to accept asks and user submissions?

Do you want to have a moderated/shared blog?

Do you want to be an informative resource versus just talking casually about your stim experiences?

Do you want your blog to be an informative resource versus a blend of stim posts and your own personal content?

Do you want to cultivate connections with other stim bloggers?

This step is thinking about the minutia of how you’re going to do whatever it is you want to do. In my case, it was deciding that this blog is a resource blog, that I’d focus on tags and archiving, that I want to put a lot of detail in my reviews and that I’d be as accessible as is possible for me.

By the way, while personal review blogs and broader resource blogs are different, one isn’t necessarily better than the other. General stim toy blogs that just post and reblog collection photos get a great following because people just want to enjoy the pretty and get to know the collator. They’re also much easier to run in terms of workload, especially for folks on mobile.

How are you going to approach the community?

This is where you think about who your audience is, who you wish to be following you and how you’re going to approach your interactions with others. Tumblr is a curious space in the sense that various flavours of activism often end up in spaces that aren’t really about activism, and that can be a tricky thing to deal with. I’m not always sure that I deal with it well, but I think at the end of the day that if you try to be true to who you are, that’s a good thing, even if others disagree with your approach.

(It’s okay if people do disagree. The number of stim blogs that exist means there’s a space for most of us.)

Things to consider include:

Who don’t you wish to follow? It is absolutely within your right as a blogger to dictate whom it is you wish to follow and interact with you, or what behaviours will result in blocking. My opinion is that it’s good to be polite about expressing it, though, especially if you’re asking blogs that feature behaviour that doesn’t cause harm to vulnerable populations to not follow you/not engage. You’re allowed to put your comfort first, but politeness is good.

Is your blog for a wider community or a section of it? Are you for anyone who stims, for disabled people who stim, ND people who stim or a targeted group like anxious stimmers or autistic stimmers?

How exclusive are you in your community building? Some blogs are completely inclusive, some blogs are largely inclusive, some are very exclusive. Stim blogs often end up being little communities of their own, so it pays to take some time to think about the kind of space you want to build.

Are you bringing other politics or modes of activism to this blog? It often pays to put this somewhere if you are or aren’t. I know that I’ve felt very uncomfortable when I’ve followed a blog only to discover a week later that the owner/mods are exclusionists. By the way, it is absolutely okay to not reveal your beliefs on any of these issues if you keep it entirely off the blog. It is also okay to be open about who you are and what you believe but not make the blog primarily about those beliefs. It is also okay to make the blog all about those beliefs.

How will you approach drama? For example, I have a block policy for hate messages: I block and never discuss the content on this blog, because I feel this is not the place to discuss people who feel the need to tell me how much they hate me for differing activism/identity approaches. I’ve got better things to do than to waste my spoons on that. Other bloggers respond to those messages and discuss them.

How will you keep your followers safe? You can do the AO3 approach of choosing not to tag - as long as you mention this on your blog description, this is entirely valid. You can tag. You can advise that there are certain things you can’t advise for and tag for the rest. You can say that this isn’t a space for discussing politics, activism or problematic content. You can say that you do discuss it. I’ve realised that I need to go back and make my approach to discussion content - that while we won’t discuss abuse or ableism or other awful things that happen to ND people in explicit detail, we won’t pretend they don’t exist or happen to us - more clear. (It’s part of the evolution from stim toy review blog to stim toy and ND blog, and I’m still playing catch-up in a lot of ways.)

I admit that my philosophy in general is to be as inclusive as possible whilst still centering stimming on ND and disabled people, and I personally will never have enough blogs to follow that do this. I am all for community building that is as accepting and non-judgemental as is possible. But this is not the only way to blog, and in the end, you do you, anon. There’s space in the world for people to have differing opinions, and the benefit of a blog is that one can make a community that suits one’s needs and philosophy.

I’ll also note that autistics and issues relating to autism (Autism $peaks, for example) have more of a presence in stim spaces, but if you are not autistic, you absolutely do not have to make your blog about autism. I believe there’s a real need for more allistic stimmers to make blogs that focus on the stimming needs of ADHD and/or anxious stimmers without autism discussions creeping in.

What do you need to do?

This step is for considering all the things you need to do to make the blog go from an idea to a thing.

Please note that this is often more professional in focus than many bloggers consider: I’m a writer, and so it’s habit for me to try and make even my non-writing blogs of a semi-professional standard.

If this feels way too much, pick and choose (remember: you don’t have to do everything).

The name of your blog. Do you have a name? Is it still available? Go and grab it now if so, even if you don’t make your blog for days, weeks or months. I sat on @stimtoybox​ for about three months before I finally made the blog.

The layout of your blog. There’s a lot of custom Tumblr designs out there, but, to be brutally honest, most of them are not user-friendly in terms of accessible and easy-to-read design. Pick a clean theme that’s easy to modify, as that will give non-Tumblr users access to your content. I know everyone thinks we only access blogs via dashboard these days, but if you get big enough, some of your anons may not be registered Tumblr users, and giving them access to your blog via an easy-to-read webpage layout matters a lot.

The avatar/icon and headers of your blog. Many layouts let you custom design these, and this helps give you a little individuality (especially on your webpage layout). You can get lots of royalty-free graphics on sites like Pixabay with no attribution required (although it’s a decent thing to put said attribution on a page). Additionally, your own photos of stim toys work great for this. Having icons and headers that are unique to you is well worth the time it takes to create them.

Bio and blog description. You don’t want an essay for this, but a little information about what you’re doing and why is great.

HTML. If you can add a few HTML links to said blog description, including links to everything people can’t access on mobile (about page, BYF page, submissions info) you’ve made your blog that much easier to use. I am more than happy to write a tutorial on the code I use here on Tumblr if anyone wants it.

Links to your other internet presences. Don’t be ashamed about doing this. You’re providing content, which is a lot of work, so it’s absolutely fair to use it as a way to direct people towards your other work (personal blog, art, writing, whatever).

Before You Follow and Submission information. If you’re allowing asks and submissions, tell people want you want - make a page for this information. (Unfortunately, you’re still going to get people who don’t read before submitting - I’ve had a few submissions that are just GIF images with no informative content, for example, even though we’re a resource blog.) It really does help, though. Likewise with the BYF, if you have folks you’d rather not follow for whatever reason.

Lastly,

You don’t have to know everything about your subject matter. If you don’t know and can’t find it out, admit it. Ask people for their input, because folks genuinely like helping each other out. They like participating; they like offering up information. The majority of your followers are going to be pretty awesome people, and they’re going to want to help, if they can. We have this massive passion in common, and we’re all here, following each other, helping each other, because we like learning and sharing.

In my opinion, there’s also a lot to be gained by being thankful and expressing gratitude to followers’ interactions. (It maybe sounds manipulative put that way, but expressing everything as a social rule makes it sound manipulative, to be honest, and for me everything is a social rule, something I’ve learnt the hard way, not a natural understanding.) Thank you is a pretty powerful word; being grateful is a pretty powerful thing. If there is anything I’ve learnt from this blog, it is that being and expressing gratitude has brought me an awful lot of good will, patience and acceptance, even when I’m absent, screwing up, making mistakes, in too much pain to be helpful or tolerant, being far too emotional or just being too overwhelmed by a blog and inbox that’s gotten bigger than I can often manage.

Be grateful for those who interact with you. You don’t have to accept hate (that gets the block button) but being grateful helps so much.

Good luck, anon. I’m pretty sure this is many more words than what you’re after, and I hope it isn’t too overwhelming for you. We’re all very much looking forward to your unique reviews and insights on stim toys!

- Mod K.A.