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egophiliac · 2 months ago

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I don’t think we’ve ever seen you draw knight of dawn before 🤔 what are your thoughts about him? Or take?

I've drawn him a couple of times, just really little/in the background. but I should draw him more, I love this guy a lot! I have many, many thoughts about him and the way he parallels Silver...and also I think it is extremely funny that his ghost is stuck in a ring. especially considering where that ring has been for the last 16-ish years.

#art #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland spoilers #twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers #twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers #don't mind me just killing time waiting for maintenance to end so i can stick my face directly into 7-12 #i mean i'm on the record (read: constantly posting) about how much i love the whole tragique backstory behind mal's birth #and. look. hold on it's a day ending in y time to be embarrassing about anime characters online again #no but really i love him. i love how he's such a vague figure but also the way his and silver's stories contrast #i cannot articulate it very well but just #i love how he's essentially like...bad end silver #he let himself go along with the big evil plan because he wanted to save his dad and not betray his king and all that #and when he finally did take a stand it was too late to stop the worst of it #meanwhile silver was immediately like NOPE WE'RE NOT DOING THIS #silver is NOT going to end up slaying the dragon thank you very much #me kicking my stupid little legs in glee over it all #and! the retrospect when you realize! that he was the one leading silver around lilia's memories!!!!#he is so happy that silver and lilia have each other!#he's so happy for them!#i want to put him in a can and hold him in my pocket for 16 years #also: his ridiculous hair. it's so silly and so good.#may vil never meet him #the knowledge that there's someone with naturally gorgeous hair who has somehow done it even dirtier than silver would destroy him

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prent1ssjareau · 3 months ago

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Agatha Harkness and Señor Scratchy // Kathryn Hahn and "Peanut Butter"

[x]

#if that bunny's name isn't peanut butter then it should be now #noooo don't go peanut butter i love you #kathryn hahn you are so loved by me #agatha has the cutest familiar EVER #agatha all along #agatha harkness #kathryn hahn #senor scratchy #aaa 1x1 #agathario #agatha all along bts #mcu #marvel cinematic universe #marvel

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luna-loveboop · 6 months ago

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Wars and Wild as knights in Lu

They have issues.

I have a lot of thoughts on Wild and Wars and their relationship (Order of this post is talking about saluting, Wild and Wars' different perspectives, memory issues, and fire) Rant time.

No saluting!!

So Wild took a formal- almost/awkwardly saluting pose when Wars confronted him in 'Entrance pt.2'

It's similar to the first time Wild addressed Wars as 'captain'. His left hand is up from where a salute should be, and his overall posture is awkward, with his shoulders and right hand raised, but it's clear he's trying to do a salute in the presence of a fellow knight.

In the second example his hand is behind his head, but his posture is very straight and his right arm stiff- he's again attempting a formal saluting position. Which is still awkward

It is less clear but his changes in posture clued me in. He goes from like a deer in the headlights to visibly sweating to straight backed and looking up at Wars- looking at the changes in his body language

Side note but I literally love how Jojo draws the champions tunic so much-

We can't see the action of Wild's body language in a comic, just the positions he went to. But he visibly leaned away from Wars before switching to a straight backed saluting-like posture. He's clearly freaked out, hence Twilight's face: >:(

I think that Wild taking somewhat military poses around Wars is important to their relationship issues because it comes from his struggle with memory and identity

.

So like. All of them have different perspectives

Wars

I adore Wars. He is baby and I love him. I think it is also important to acknowledge that he would not speak to any of the others this way.

And the scarf man cmon it's so pretty they are so cute-

Why is Wars talking to Wild like this? He's called him out and reprimanded him multiple times in front of the others. Wild has taken it well but tbh if it was Legend I think he would be on fire.

To some extent I think he is in captain mode. I think that he has trouble seeing Wild as not a knight. Wars gives Wild respect as a knight who sacrificed for his kingdom, but now it seems he's taking it away as a knight who's not doing well enough since he 'disregarded the plan'

At least I think that's the outside (or Wild's) view of it. But Wars internally really cares about Wild and he saw him run up to a giant and lose it. Different ways of showing concern perhaps?

Who wouldn't want to keep Wild from getting more scars?

I just. Don't doubt for a second Wars really cares about Wild- even if the way he's acting still isn't cool. He has no right to treat him like a soldier any more than the rest of the chain, and right now I think Wild is acting as the more mature person.

Wild

I adore Wild. He is baby and I love him. I think it is also important to acknowledge that although he is clearly making efforts after Twilight's injury, Wild has ignored Wars for the majority of Lu, by not speaking to him much, and not thanking or acknowledging Wars when he directly helped him. (Small example being walking with Hyrule not Wars when injured and not directly responding to Wars)

Wars cares about and respects Wild, but it seems Wild wants nothing to do with him, and he's been cold towards Wars for the majority of Lu. To Wild, Wars reminds him of his perceived failure. Which is valid feelings, but still not fair. And I think that ask is talking about these two.

The thing I love about this is each of them are right and wrong in some ways, leading to the tension between them. So fully blaming either of them is not logical

The rest of the chain is just vibing. Except twilight who's mad and wants them to just grow up, but. Heros of courage not wisdom @uniquevoidflowers ;)

And that ask- '''Are any of the Links ever jealous of another Link for adventures that were less difficult/life threatening?'' ''When you hear Wild say he 'hates' someone you'll have your answer.''' somewhat leads to my next point-

Wild's identity and memory issues exacerbate all of this

In Entrance, Twilight is being stressed and defensive, that's ok. What concerns me most is that Twilight has talked with Wild through stuff like this in his rough moments

Wild has tried to be formal several times- he is not very good at it

Four's face I can't didnwidkekfjej

Wild isn't and can't be 'him'- the same 'perfect' (<actually has crippling anxiety) knight he was before, and Twilight knows this. And I agree with him a bit, I think, that Wars is making things worse in Wild's mind by being that perfect soldier, and seemingly holding Wild to a standard he isn't

Wild's attempts at saluting is symbolic of that- Wars makes him feel like a failure trying to be the person he should be. But Wild shouldn't be anyone but himself.

Anyways. Fire.

Wars and Wild have issues, and I want them to work through all their relationship drama so they can reach their PEAK dynamic, which is obviously this

I mean like. We need these two to be friends

Anyways. Wild is in this constant state of identity crisis, and being around Wars has not been beneficial- neither of them is or has been showing the other the respect they deserve. Not as knights, but as people and brothers. They need a get along shirt.

All this Art is by Jojo @linkeduniverse au!

:)

#that's it that's my argument. they need a get along shirt #I think times armor would work. they are small enough to be the kids shoved in dads clothes to get along #it could hold up when wars starts breathing fire and wild blowing stuff up #linked universe #linkeduniverse #hiii Jesse #Lu wild #lu wars #let's talk about it! I know some of yall will disagree with me probably on some of this #open communication and whatnot #but. do not take this post to hate on wild or wars bc they are both baby <3 fire babies #this post took like three days. like it.#<wait that's unclear. I don't mean literally like it lol I just want you to like as because I made it for you and want it to make you happy #':D if I've said anything like mean or offensive accidentally sorry let me know. we all care so much about these little arsonists <33 #remember you are loved yall matter so much and I care about you #:)#if I have type the word 'wars' or 'wild' one more time I'm gonna lose it

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ruporas · 2 years ago

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lonely

[ID: A limited palette of green and pink, Vashwood comic. The first page serves as a prologue. The first panel shows Vash speaking to someone off screen while Wolfwood is lingering behind him. A black arrow is drawn pointing at him. In the second panel, Vash is buying donuts in the distance while Wolfwood is once again in view, lingering. and the black arrow is drawn pointing at him. In the third panel, Vash is leaving a cubicle and turning towards his right with a slightly peeved expression. He sees Wolfwood, leaning against the cubicle, waiting for him, and with the black arrow drawn, pointing at him, implicating the consistent hovering of Wolfwood’s presence during Vash’s everyday. At the bottom of the page, they’re drawn out of panel with Vash turning to Wolfwood and saying with an irritated expression, “You’re really following me everywhere, huh?” Wolfwood responds, “What, you got a problem?” Vash responds without hesitation, “Yeah, kinda...”

The second page starts with a new day. In the first panel, Vash is seen alone, weighing apples in his hands at a mart, with crowds passing behind him. In the second panel, he turns to his right and starts to say, “Hey, Wolfwood...” In the third panel, he’s startled from seeing a stranger, whom he’d accidentally called out to when he was expecting to see Wolfwood. He says, “Oh, you’re not him. Sorry!” In the fourth panel, the stranger walks off and Vash muses, “Right, he said he had something to do today...”

The third page begins with a close up of Vash's miffed expression, the continuation of Vash's thoughts, "Now that he's not here, this is just like how I used to be, but... It feels lonely somehow. Oh well, I'll see him again tonight, like always." In the second panel, it shows Vash walking through the marketplace crowd, alone. In the third panel, the door panel is a close up of the door opening with a peek of Vash's head. He says, "Wolfwood!" In the fourth panel, Vash is holding a bag of food with a bright smile and says, "Are you hungry? I got you something to eat today!"

The fourth page begins with a shot of the room, two beds being highlighted, one of them being made properly with the blanket draped over the bed and the other with the blanket folded and pillow sitting on top of it. There's no sign of Wolfwood. The second panel shows Vash with a disappointed look as he thinks, "He's still not here?" The third panel shows Vash putting the bag of food on the table. Stapled to the paper bag is the receipt with a written note "For Wolfwood." Vash's thoughts continue "He does like to stay out so, I guess there's no reason to worry..." The fourth panel shows Vash sitting his bed somberly with his thoughts continued, "It's not any of my business anyway..."

The fifth page starts with a close up his blank expression as he looks downwards, thinking, "Even if he left completely... That'd be understandable and better for him. I'll just travel alone again... like before... Huh?" The next panel shows Vash's composure break, tears welling up in his eyes suddenly, as he didn't expect to cry. He starts to sob, putting his hands to his face to quiet himself and wipe at his tears, as he says, "Ugh... Dammit... I miss h..." The last panel shows Vash leaning over into his hands, still crying, and in the back, the door swings wide open with a bam as Wolfwood walks through with the punisher swung behind him. He shouts, "SPIKEY! You in here?!"

The sixth page starts with Wolfwood confused, looking at Vash and Vash looks back, just as confused, with tears in his eyes and snot out of his nose. Wolfwood starts saying, "Ah? You..." No longer in panels, at the bottom of the page, Wolfwood takes the Punisher off of himself and starts to walk towards Vash, continuing with slight concern, "What's wrong with you? Did something happen?" Vash, hurriedly begins to wipe at his tears, denying immediately, "No! No, I'm fine! Nothing happened!"

The seventh page, Vash points towards the table, with a hand still wiping at his tears and he smiles as he says, "I uh got you food. On the table." Wolfwood looks towards to the table and responds, "Oh. I was getting hungry, thanks." He turns his head back to Vash immediately after with an uncertain expression, knowing the other wasn't responding to his concern, and says, "But, I know you're an idiot with this stuff, so I'm reminding you again. Don't brush it off if it's an issue, alright?"

The eight page, Vash's tears have dried and he looks to Wolfwood with a soft smile and responds, "Yeah. It's okay though..." A panel at the center shows a side view of Vash approaching Wolfwood. At the bottom of the page, with no panel, is a close up shot of Vash's hand, holding onto the edge of Wolfwood's jacket sleeve, as he says, "Because you're here now. Wolfwood."

The final page is a back shot of both of them standing next to each other, Wolfwood's head tilted slightly to the left, not fully believing Vash as he says, "That doesn't answer anything, Spikey." Vash responds, "There's no need to talk about it! You should enjoy your food. Let's have a drink too?" Wolfwood responds, "Tsk, tsk. Fine, yeah. I could use one." END ID]

#vashwood #vash the stampede #nicholas d wolfwood #trigun #trigun maximum #but onto this comic... i think and talk a LOT about vash's loneliness bc trigun is just. kind of central on that for a good while! esp in #the original manga he was alone for a good portion of it and he tends to keep others away like how he ran away from meryl and milly when #they tried to tag along. and he was kind of bothered when he realized ww was following him around Too. at the core even though he loves #humans and he loves deeply the people he does know -- he isnt really much of a people person and i think thats been the case since he was #young considering his initial doubts towards humans... with the exception of kids bc kids dont give him moral conflicts. so suddenly #here comes wolfwood!!! his guide. someone TRULY affixed to him until he has to get to knives. someone who isnt budging and someone whos #really good at following him around and even seems like he goes like 5 steps ahead to make sure vash doesnt run on him #in one way its - i don't want you to follow me bc i don't want to burden you and i don't want you to kill the people i want to save.#in another way its - i like this companionship. i like waking up to you and i like ending the way with you. i like talking to someone who #knows my world. i like being in your space and sometimes i enjoy talking about our day #theyre just living together. like. roadtrip buddies or theyre also under the same roof because they're going everywhere together.#trimax they mainly spend their mornings together and if they had personal business attend the other person would usually know and itd only #be during the midday. anyway bc of this kind of companionship i figure that vash eventually grew accustom to it and he really. cant go back #to the kind of loneliness from before. it's harder to imagine and it'd be harder to withstand. esp after 2 years with lina and her grandma.#ruporas art

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feroluce · 6 months ago

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Not pictured: Aventurine asking Ratio if he remembers where they parked

#honkai star rail #hsr #hsr boothill #hsr dan heng #hsr caelus #hsr march 7th #Boothill openly admits he will rob someone blind if he doesn't like them. This is usually how he gets a new phone too.#you look at him and tell me he's never stolen a car NSJZJNDMD #I would love to see Boothill hijack a whole-ass space ship please he would have so much fun with it BSMJZNDMD #I know he and Aventurine have a temporary truce but Boothill pretty explicitly makes plans to kill him and Topaz in his party lines #so I wonder if they can get along or not haha #personally I think it's way funnier if they don't nskzjzndk #I hope Boothill threatens to give Aventurine a lead headache every other sentence-#-and Aventurine openly rubs it in that Boothill CAN'T kill him yet because he needs his info to find Oswaldo #I hope they strangle each other BSNZJNSND #caelus #march 7th #dan heng #boothill #...#henghill #because I can #(Dan Heng knows his boyfriend so well to expect things like this out of him-)#bootheng

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lil-lemon-snails · 8 months ago

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"I can't ignore what's under dancefloor boards, The rhythm of my heart a dead-as-disco beat, But I still move my feet, to slip out of this groove, I'm free" ~ 2econd 2ight 2eer, Will Wood, The Normal Album

I have been plagued with visions of LDR Sun every time I listen to this song and I NEEDED to get this out of my system @spadillelicious when do we get to smooch the boy pLEASE

v textless version and close ups under cut!! v

#fnaf #fnaf security breach #fnaf dca #dca au #dca fanart #dca fandom #Love Death and Rollerskates #LDR sun #will wood #2econd 2ight 2eer #the normal album #tw eyestrain #cw guns #if you see any mistakes in the text no you didn't #took me way too long to get everything lined up and readable PLEASE--#just bear with me on this one i am going FERAL #story of my life but this was going to be a simple sketch to reward myself between deadlines and then it became a WHOLE thing /pos #(i still don't understand how to draw rollerskates!!!! or guns!!!)#but my LDR brainworms were soooo happy to get spotlight on this one akjshdsg #i am screaming endlessly about this fic I had been wanting to draw sun and his funky windbreaker for MONTHS!!#and every time you mention crescent eyes my little brain is like “DRAW THAT” kasjfhdf #but so many other things kept coming up and i kept having to put it off #and then this song came along and i was like. ENOUGH. IT IS TIME!!!!!#An allusion to The Tell-Tale Heart AND disco dancing?! HELL FREAKING YEAH!!!!!#and then several reference image hunts and a LOT of colour happened and here we are :3 #okay okay tag rambling is being cut off now but i just akjhsdg am thrilled to finally share this--#Please go read Love Death and Rollerskates by spadillelicious it is FANTASTIC

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somegrumpynerd · 2 months ago

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Okay I know I'm the most biased person about dadmare, but you can't honestly tell me that if Cross started to mention the way xgaster treated him and his brother as children - the way an adult bullied and belittled and abused them - that it wouldn't make Nightmare see red

#UTDR #UTMV #Dadmare #Like the call is coming from inside the house again!!#Nightmare trying to be detached and collected to prove he doesn't have a familial attachment to his henchmen #And then he hears that Cross was treated badly by adults as a child and he's instantly like ''I'll kill him myself''#I just #Okay #Wick very nicely talked to me about Cross and dadmare yesterday and I'm still whipping it around like a dog with a new toy #LIKE I just think it could be a little healing for both of them #For Cross to get someone in an authoritative role who praises and appreciates him and refuses to treat him like that #And for Nightmare it must be at least a little rewarding to see someone who went through hell as a child and do everything you can to make #-them comfortable and tell them it wasn't their fault #Like I'm sure he still has stuff from his incident to process and maybe sharing it with Cross could do that #Obviously it's not 1 to 1 on what they went through but it might be similar enough to be cathartic #I don't know I just want to see them get along #I want Cross to have a father figure that would tear the multiverse in half to save him #I want Nightmare to learn to love and show it #I want 16 days off work in a row so I can lie in bed and go insane about this

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barschter000 · 2 months ago

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broke: Due to his attractiveness, Barok has slept with countless (wo)men.

woke: Despite his attractiveness, Barok is a virgin.

Bespoke: Because of entirely different factors, Barok does not know what sex is.

#this was the result of a silly conversation I had with my bf where we discussed that - since we believe the van zieks parents died early in—#—barok's life - barok didn't really have any women in his life until klint brought lady b along and thus is also confused and awkward with—#—them as soon as the interaction goes beyond etiquette-based back and forth and barok has to improvise #barok knows what sex does! but he is way too sexually repressed (and/or gay and/or ace) to ever really ask himself or show interest in—#—discovering the actual logistics of it. and then klint also isn't around anymore to explain it to him...#don't get me started on gay sex how is barok supposed to know how men have sex with each other if all he's hearing about is that it's bad #this is mostly a joke unless you don't want to treat it as such. i just love making up silly things about him #the great ace attorney #tgaa #barok van zieks #spoilers #tgaa spoilers #dgs spoilers #<- just to be safe

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arealtrashact · 6 months ago

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If it wasn't for your Tumblr, I never would've watched The 10th (Tenth?) Kingdom. I thank you. 😃

You're welcome.

Now you too can live with the knowledge that we'll never get the planned sequel and, as a result, never see the abomination that these two managed to spawn.

I am haunted by the fact Simon Moore (writer) confirmed that their offspring would be 100% wolf.

#'Don't freak out Virginia. Our love is so pure that it transcends all boundaries--including nature's laws!'#trashtalk #the tenth kingdom #anonymous #I think one of the reasons the Tenth Kingdom is so fascinating to me is because of how unintentionally (?) dark it is #A human woman giving birth to an animal. Wolf's heavily implied cannibalism ( and heavily implied . . . other stuff )#EVERYTHING going on with Virginia's mother. Oh yeah and Wolf's family being burnt alive :- )#on a lighter note Simon Moore also confirmed that their hellspawn was in fact intended to be female #despite Wolf's previous statement 'He's a little furry chap just like me!'#so either Wolf's senses aren't as sharp as he boasts or . . . -trans flag cross fade-#and on top of /becoming/ a father Wolf was apparently meant to reunite with his own along the way #Do you know how badly I want to see the man who reared a reprobate like Wolf #and then there's the 'Wolf becomes a girl's boarding school teacher' subplot...............................................................

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chiyana · 3 months ago

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Bruce: now, for the last part of this meeting

Dick, Jason, Tim, Stephanie, Damian, Cass, and Duke: ?

Bruce: -turns around to bring up a power point presentation, the title card of which just reads 'Please Be Normal About Tim'-

Bruce: -turns back around-

Bruce: ...Tim why are you the only one still here

Tim: I just like power point presentations

#Jason keeps beating up Tim and then chasing him around trying to get him to join him #including AFTER Tim kicked him directly in the balls #he had a whole murder board about Tim when he was stalking him #Damian also keeps trying to beat up/kill Tim and prove he is the 'superior Robin'#Dick is generally pretty chill but he and Tim have a history of getting into shenanigans together #also Dick has a tendency to go a bit feral when Tim is involved and hurt #Stephanie once said Tim had a 'bad case of the Stephs' and while I love that for her absolutely not #Cass neither wants to kill Tim nor be romantically entangled with him #which is good!#but like Dick she also goes along with his plans without as many follow up questions as she should probably have #and by 'as many' I mean 'any'#she pretended to stab him through the chest to throw off a bunch of assassins #and I'm pretty sure she didn't question a single second of it #Tim just turned to her like 'I have a fake sword and I need you to pretend to kill me with it'#Cass just gave a thumbs up with no follow-up questions #Duke #my beloved #I know he and Tim don't interact much in canon #but in my heart I feel he would not be normal about Tim either #like regular ass Tim Drake figuring out Batman's secret identity and deciding to just become Robin because Gotham and Batman need it?#attaching rockets to a skateboard to get around?#coming up with insane and convoluted plans and consistencies that don't make sense to anyone else?#plans and contingencies that WORK?#Duke would see Tim as aspirational and go along with whatever insane bullshit nonsense he comes up with just to see what happens #he would 100% be down for whatever Tim has planned and would absolutely feed into it #he just wants to crank that little chaos gremlin up to eleven and watch him go #Bruce is desperate to keep them from interacting in any capacity for longer than thirty seconds at a time because HE KNOWS #HE KNOWS what will happen if they ever team up #it's why he put them on separate shifts #for the record Bruce ALSO had to sit through this presentation

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flufflecat · 2 years ago

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this is the most beautiful creature on earth and I will kill someone if it asks me to

#horseshoe crabs #I had a fun day at the beach #60% of my time was spent looking for horseshoe crabs #sadly I didn't find any tagged ones so no horseshoe crab pin for me 😔#God I love these creatures though #shoutout to the girl and her boyfriend who were very interested in hearing my Horseshoe Crab Facts spiel #especially bc the girl let me teach her how to hold the crab so she could take a pic with it #I respect you random beach girl #and your lack of fear when faced with a creature that looks like a facehugger #I'm obsessed with how utterly chill and harmless horseshoe crabs are #they just scoot along like little roombas #and look so creepy but have no ability to hurt anyone #(I don't think they're creepy though. I think they're adorable perfect little angels)#and the way they move is perfect. it looks fake #I wish I could spend the next 7 hours at the beach staring at horseshoe crabs #why oh why must I be here with my family. these losers want to do things like 'go back to the hotel because it's getting dark'#booooo cowards #join me in some nighttime horseshoe crab excursions #cute animals #crabs #(not actually a crab)

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zivazivc · 10 months ago

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guess who

I've seen a few artists I like making human art and I got inspired to make my own.

First version was based just on their character designs and personality, and what inspired their look in the first place. Second version happened when I took into account their backstory and what I imagine human versions of their parents' would look like. I don't consider either of these "canon", because to me they're just trolls but it was a fun experiment to try.

Now back to our regularly scheduled programming of me drawing little colorful dolls

#my dumbasses 🫶#ex bandmates #trolls oc #hed #les #dreamworks trolls #trolls #human trolls #my art #Trolls genres are weird and even though I can see them kind of as different human races (along other things)#I don't think you can compare them with real world races/nationalities.#As in I don't think you can point at a troll genre and say it's the equivalent of x race.#For me it varies from troll to troll even between trolls who are related.#So making a 'perfect' human version of these two brothers started feeling more and more like #like a mission impossible the more time I spent on this...#So these drawings are just two attempts #and I wanted to share.#also on a different note #the first les's hair is supposed to look pretty greasy. can anyone tell? (bc a friend said they can't see it)#and i feel like the first hed doesn't fit stylistically with the rest #probs because i drew him first. after not drawing a human for like 4 months (such is the life of a troll obsessor)#but i do love how he looks so i didn't want to go in and redraw him #also i don't have any more motivation for this and i just keep focusing on and picking at lil details #so i'm posting to get it off my hands :P

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ellie-shy · 2 months ago

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I get it. I understand Lucanis now. I understand him. So. Much.

I just finished his quest Inner Demons and locked into his romance. And I cried. I legit cried while doing his personal quest. Because I felt it. It felt so personal, to Lucanis, and to myself.

I'm gonna pour my heart out under the cut because Lucanis has just ranked up so high into one of my favourite fictional characters ever. And that means a lot to me.

When I played my first playthrough (and of course avoiding spoilers) I saved Minrathous. And I was devasted to see how Treviso looked in the aftermath. Then, Lucanis was hardened. I know that there will be consequences with Luc's arc but I was not sure what it will be. So, after finishing the other companions' personal quest and getting the Hero of Veilguard for everyone... except Lucanis. I really thought after defeating Illario I would get the Hero status with him, but nooooo. Only after finishing the main quest, I got it. But, I felt something was... missing. Something was missing with Luc's arc, but I couldn't put my finger on it. Thus, I finished my first playthrough.

Understandable, I did hardened Lucanis. But it got me so curious... what was it that's missing in Lucanis's personal questline?

Then I made my dear dwarven Grey Warden warrior Rook : Juliet Thorne, to romance him.

And I finally got to the Inner Demons quest, a quest that I never done before (and also tried so hard to avoid spoilers before doing it 😂).

Hold my hand while I confess this. I cried. I really cried when doing Inner Demons. This is what I was missing in my first playthrough?? Helping Lucanis escaped from his inner prison???

Inner Demons felt so personal. Like deeply personal. My Rook is actively involving herself into Lucanis's deep and personal thoughts. And you know what made me cry even more? This quest felt personal to me too.

I also understand Spite now!!! Why he wants OUT!! He didn't just want to go out in the world through Lucanis, he can't even go out of the Ossuary that Lucanis has made for himself, his own turmoil and guilt 😭😭😭😭😭😭

I get it now 😭 Oh God do I get it now (still crying btw).

Spite wanted to go out and it knows that they aren't in the Ossuary anymore, but why does Spite keep seeing the Ossuary? That is what made Spite so frustrated! Until Spite was desperate enough to ask for Rook's help because Spite knows, Rook "opens doors, never closing them" 😭 Spite knows the only way to get through Lucanis, is through Rook.

Lucanis, has made a giant wall to protect himself from everyone. Including Spite. He self-isolates, to the point of pushing Rook away. But he didn't mean it. Lucanis has a heart of gold. He is kind, he remembers my Rook's chocolate drink, he cooks for everyone, he considers Emmrich's vegetarian preferences, he buys things for the team, he isolates himself in the pantry because he doesn't want to cause trouble to anyone. He is a selfless bastard that's willing to sacrifice his happiness and comfort for everyone around him. Why? Because he thinks he doesn't deserve it. 😭 This mindset has developed after years of trauma. Years of training and torture... so he can be perfect. If he can't be perfect (which is the very high standard and expectation that he has set for himself), then he can never have happiness. At least that's what he thought. And I get it, because I have this trauma too.

This is why he punished himself so much. He was rescued by Rook and lived, but has a demon inside him. His city is saved, but at the cost of Neve's city. He made a god bleed, but didn't kill the god as per the contract. He killed Zara, his abuser, but he was devastated that Illario, his family, was involved. Every single time, everytime Lucanis thought he had a moment of victory/happiness, it will be at the cost of another he cared for. And he punished himself again, and again. Trying so hard to solve his own problems without involving anyone, and never asking for help. And that's why he pushed Rook away, he can't lose another person he cared for. Because he is such a selfless man!

I felt this, his trauma, fear and anxiety, I can relate with Lucanis. This feeling will eat you from the inside. It will make you develop a sense of self-hate, low self-esteem, not being satisfied with everything you have done and etc etc. It will drown you, literally, within your own spiral of self-hate. I cried while playing the Inner Demons quest, because it felt so personal to me too, as if I'm drowning again. But visualizing it with Lucanis this time. And hey, the Ossuary is an underwater prison. Lucanis is drowning.

And it's hard, you know. Because you will feel like no one is gonna help you other than yourself. Yet, you can't even save yourself. Lucanis couldn't save himself.

Until Rook.

The way that Lucanis just kept pushing her away, but my Rook just kept breaking down every single wall he built. Reassuring him, acknowledging him, supporting him, validating him, every step of the way. Rook didn't give up on him. Rook cares for him, so deeply. And nothing can stop her from reaching to Lucanis. Lucanis was so scared to lose Rook, or something would happen -- but Rook knows, it's gonna be okay.

I cried again because... to have someone like Rook, who willingly bring down every wall you make, carefully guiding you out of the place that's drowning you... that's special. That's very special. Rook is so special to Lucanis. Whether he was romanced or not, Rook is special. I was so happy for Lucanis, he has found someone, that will bring down his walls, that rescued him from drowning, that reassures him that he is enough. Because he is enough. And he will be okay.

This quest is so personal to me. Lucanis is a fictional character that resonates with me, so deeply. I understand him better now, because I see myself in Lucanis, and the experience he has been through are so similar with mine irl (minus being possessed ofc haha). It felt so validating, knowing that I am not alone. But don't worry about me, I'm in my own healing journey too <3 The moment I bawled my eyes out was when reading his thoughts fragments. My actual thoughts that time was "why does these thoughts sound so much like mine?".

Now I finally understand what was missing in my 1st playthrough. Knowing Lucanis, he built a wall to Rook, because he just lost his city. He has to put his guard up to Rook because he knows, no one will save him. Eventhough, in the end, he does trusts Rook, but not enough to bring his walls down. And that's valid, because I would do the same.

This is what makes his romance so meaningful and deep. He is vulnerable to a romanced Rook. He trusts Rook wholeheartedly. Literally, placing his heart on his hands and presenting it to them. Rook freed him from his inner demon (which was actually, himself), and guess what happens next? Lucanis would literally worship the ground Rook walks on. Let me tell you something, to achieve this level of trust in a relationship with someone like Lucanis, is otherworldly. I can't explain how meaningful Rook is to Lucanis. Perhaps even Rook wouldn't know how important they are to Lucanis. Only Lucanis knows how much Rook means to him. And me, the player.

Lucanis is a man that's going to treat you right. He would cook for you, he would take care of you, he would waste his time with you, he would do anything you ask. He would live for you, he would die for you, he would kill any gods you ask to keep you safe. His words and actions carry weight. Lucanis is indeed a passionate man, but his passion is only for the person that deserves it... a romanced Rook.

This is such an emotional post, but I just want to express how this short 'outing' quest means a lot to me. I won't go into detail on how much similarities I have with him. Just let me say this, I see myself in Lucanis Dellamorte, and I'm happy that I'm not alone going through the journey of healing my inner self.

Let me be hopeful, that one day, I will find my own Rook <3