#almost didn't include the final scene in this part but :)) i thought it deserved to make the final cut

[evilfrogcereal29]

Pizza guy!Nikto - Chapter 1

(ok... This is going to be like, maybe one of the most weirdly specific fanfics you've ever read. For context: I work at a pizza place IRL. Thats it. Thats the only context. I was at work and. Thought about Nikto working there too. That's all you need to know. Enjoy :]!!!

This is going to be a Nikto x GN!customer!reader, but reader is NOT introduced in this chapter.

Cw/tws: mentions of violence- including towards an animal! I think thats all? Enjoy :)!!

NOTE: all text in red & italics are Nikto's voices

Nikto was bored.

Retirement was miserable, and Nikto found himself restless day in, and day out. Unable to find peace while wasting away at home. Sure, he had lot's of retirement money, but he had this urge to work, to kill. He would give anything to be on a plane to another mission right about now, but he was too 'broken'. That's what they basically told him. Too mentally unwell to keep working. A hazard to his own team.

Heh.

What the fuck do they know? They don't know what goes on in his head. So what he broke that recruit's arm? They touched him when he warned them of the consequences. Or who cares that he hit one of his higher-up's service dogs with the buggy? It should've been servicing it's owner, not under the damn vehicle! He's not a danger, the other voices are!

Speaking of voices, they aren't reacting well either, metaphorically biting away at Nikto's psyche each day he did fucking nothing. He felt useless, and they reminded him of that. You idiot, you deserve your suffering for being the way you are. Broken. Broken little solider.

He still gets calls from his mates in the service, especially Krueger, who always makes sure to call as often as possible to keep the man updated on missions, even if they didn't concern him anymore. He suggested that Nikto pick up a part-time job, not for the money, but the work. God (and Krueger) only knows what Nikto's mind gets upto when left to its own devices.

Nikto scoffed at first, he didn't like the idea of working at some measley fast food job, he was above that. He crawled through the fucking trenches and ripped out the throats of women and men, and would be reduced to... What? Cleaning a fucking stove? Heating up processed foods for weak civilians? No. He wouldn't. The voices mocked him, this is what we've been reduced to? Patheic.

And then the rot set in.

Krueger had been very insistant on a visit the second he had time away from work, flying out to see Nikto even as the man ignored his texts and calls. He wasn't dead, Krueger knew that, but he also wasn't in a good place. He couldn't let his companion live like this pathetic slob. Cause that's exactly what he was becoming.

Water and alcohol bottles littered the floor, stacks on stacks of old, half eaten take-out. Junk that should’ve been tossed long ago created walled barriers throughout the house. It was a scene out of horders, and the smell was awful. Christ. Krueger was no clean freak, but this? He'd rather sleep next to corpses than this cesspool of rotting filfth, and in the middle of it all, sat his balaclava-ed, smelly friend on the sofa. Krueger grimmaced, taking careful steps. He nearly stepped on poor Sputnik, who had become content with spending her days lazying about, peeing in places without Nikto's knowledge, and eating off his leftover scraps of food, growing just as lethargic as her owner.

"Nikto... Scheiße..” he would almost be outraged at the man’s carelessness if he didn’t understand how the other functioned, without a job, without a purpose, Nikto was truly a nobody. He lifted the man’s head with a gentleness, an action only someone like Krueger could get away with, looking into those glazed-over icy blues.

“This is… this is bad Nikto..” he mutters, eyes filled with..love? Concern? Something Nikto wasn’t used to often. Nikto finally shows evidence of life as his eyes flicker up in wordless understanding. Krueger continues,

"I can't stand to see you like this. You can't stand being like this. I'm going to help you."

Krueger lifts his friend up, albiet with mild arguing and growling from the disguntled bear of a man that Nikto is. He sets Nikto's cheap laptop on his lap and types in job sites, which already has Nikto tense.

"Krueger- чёрт побери! you're acting like my fucking mother-"

"good, about time someone comes in and wipes your ass, if not yourself." Krueger grumbles, scrolling through the job offers, "what's your SNILS...?"

After a painstaking back and forth, and Krueger prying for all of Nikto's personal info, he sent in a few applications on his friend's behalf. Patting the other on the back as Nikto's thumbs rubbed at his temples, fighting back the urge to pulverize his only real friend. You really should, he's a nuisance...

"this is... Not ideal.." Nikto finally grumbles, finishing the last of some lukewarm whisky from the bottle.

"none of this is, meine freund, but this...Is worse." Noone has ever seen them like this, so...domestic. In reality, this was as hard for Krueger as it was for Nikto, The Alligence wasn't the same without the Russian, fighting wasn't the same. Krueger rested a hand on his shoulder.

"everything is going to change, can you try to change a little with it?"

Change? Krueger wanted him to change? Was that even possible? He'd been so set in his ways ever since the incident. But the look in Krueger eyes let Nikto know that there wasn't really a choice.

What are you kidding? You could change as far as you could throw a boulder! Never!

He sighed, deeply. His shoulders slumping miserably as he exhaled.

"fine. But If we don't like the job-"

"ja, ja, you don't have to stay. I get it. I can't make you." He interupted, waving his hand dismissively, "but don't just give up right away. Can you promise me that?"

Nikto hated making promises, he hated feeling like he owed anyone anything, he didn't take on debts or deals. Go ahead, make more promises you can't keep. We know the truth.

Yet here he was, being interviewed by an elderly couple, who pitied him for his past as a solider.

"me and Martha are going to see how you fair in the kitchen, and if that's turns out to be too overwhelming we can move you to a more simple job like delivery. Just bring the customers their pizzas." The eldery man said with an acknowledging smile.

He nodded to the man, Michael, reaching across the table to shake his hand, thanking him begrudgingly for this... 'Opportunity'. Thats damn well what it was, but Nikto didn't quite see it that way yet. As he left with a work shirt displaying the place's name and logo, he felt his heart drop. And a shrill, annoying voice invading his mind.

You are truely a fucking Развалюха. Good luck ever trying to live a normal life!

And now Nikto was worried.

------------------------------------------------------

Hai :3 I hope you enjoyed this first chapter, I wanted to introduce reader in this first part but it was getting long and I also just wanted to get something out. There will be more chapters for this, but they might be kind of slow to come out😭 work takes up a LOT of my time tbh, but also working inspires me cause...yk pizza place setting so- its a double edged sword. But if you enjoyed pls like and reblog it means sm♥��♥️ ty for reading!!

And to the person who sent me an ask in my inbox about the relationship dynamics between NiktoKrueger + criminal!reader, I see u and ur creative vision, I started writing something today in response ;) just gimme some time!!!

Also an @ list for some mooties who I think would like to see this :3

@simp4konig @lizzy019 @fishsinsareacknowledged @zoloftwithdrawalnausea sorry If I missed anyone, lmk if you'd like to be tagged (or not tagged) in future chapters!!

[swan2swan]

So, spoiler thoughts:

So, a good season. Pretty decent, but I'm a little worried that they blew everything by making Season 1 so good.

Definitely had some of the best scenes in the franchise, but the way Season 1 ramped up felt like it was a little...shallow of a splash on Season 2. 8/10 season, maybe a 7/10.

Arguably my least favorite season of the cartoon, and that includes Season 4 of Camp Cretaceous....okay, no, I think this was much better.

I felt like the Brooklynn Alone episode didn't quite match the power of the Ben Alone episode, and that was the first issue. But that also feels like an episode where they had to cut some stuff down with Brooklynn--in fact, there's almost half an episode missing, it felt like. Woulda loved to see her adjusting to public life with her limb difference, and the DLN. Woulda made thee moment where Soyona gently comments on her limb difference all the better.

Speaking of Soyona, I'm glad thy kept her just as much of a menace. I was worried at a few points, but in the end, it was clear that she had complete control the whole time. Probably knows that Brooklynn is spying on her, too....but she's letting it happen.

The episodes with the gang also didn't hit hard enough. It really felt like they waffled around too much with the whole "Kenji Wants to Kill Himself" plotline for too long, and then missed the window. That's indisputably my biggest issue with the seasons: I hate when shows forfeit the essentials of their episodic format and just keep kicking the ball down the road. Kenji risks his life. Yaz gasps. Kenji risks his life. Yaz gasps. Kenji risks his life. Yaz gasps. It's a disservice to BOTH when you don't get to the point and do it five times over.

Then there was Zayna--a delightful character, more than welcome, but I felt that we deserved more of an exploration of "Hey, we're taking on someone who was the same age we were when we were Traumatized. Let's keep the same from happening to her, okay?" And then they could have focused on that a little more than one throwaway gag from Darius.

There also wasn't a lot of introspection on the group, and Darius's infatuation with Brooklynn and Kenji's falling-out with her also seemed a little diluted...meant to be products of odd happenstance and Bad Timing, a Malevolent Coincidence, rather than stagnation and an inevitable reaction. Such is the consequence of a backstory, though.

HOWEVER...the scene in Soyona's apartment was among the best in the franchise. Tense and powerful, wonderfully acted and perfectly paced, it was only matched by Brooklynn's return later. Soyona and Brooklynn played off each other in a way that made them the most engaging part of the season--both a praise and a criticism (the second-best part was possibly Sammy and Zayna, though, again...if they'd gotten into the "Keep Her From Experiencing What Happened To Us" part, it mighta been better.

The Leucistic Baryonyx was a fine addition, but I do wish they'd had the budget to bring in another new dinosaur. Maybe a Megaraptor of some sort. It worked, and the HORROR aspect was definitely there, but...eh. The part where Red figured out "Oh, clicking noises make you happy?" was PHENOMENAL THOUGH??? I FORGOT THAT RAPTORS WERE SMART? I WAS WONDERING HOW THEY WERE COMMUNICATING AND THEN I REALIZED THAT IT WAS JUST RED FIGURING THINGS OUT?????????? BECAUSE SHE'S SMART?????

But also, this felt very much like the Quarry Season. A lot of stuff is happening, there's a nice big group of people, but it's very enclosed. You can even see it in the concept art: the village in Episode 2's credits, the tarmac in Episode 10, this world shoulda been bustling, but they could only afford so much. Less an indictment of the show and more of the budget given to them. Suchomimus coulda been chasing villagers instead of schlorping water, and there coulda been some guards on the tarmac surrounding Brooklynn for that final meeting.

I was very delighted when she went with Soyona, though. And when her PTSD got her in the WORST moment.

Anyway. Hoping next season takes it to a new level. This one had the spunk of Season 1, but it didn't have the reach. But maybe a rewatch will help (it won't, most of my criticisms are Set In Stone, I'm just Correct).

[jojo-ker06]

The people have NOT spoken about this one, but still, here is:

✨️WoaS Asha Lore✨️

(The first WoaS post of 2025!)

Costumes and Hairstyle:

Asha is the character in my rewrite with the most outfit changes. The outfits are there to show that I can't stop drawing outfits, it's become a problem her character has changed.

Her outfits in Act 1 (plus her cape):

(Outfit for outside) (Outfit for inside)

Her outfits in Act 2 (plus the cape):

("At All Costs" Dress) (Act 2 Outfit)

(Two sneak peeks to other outfits. The one on the left is for her transformation dress, the other for a scene in the epilouge.)

Just like her dresses, her hair will also reflect her character growth, becoming more open the more the story progresses. Here you can see little sketches I made that show her different hairstyles.

(I drew this one just for fun. I might use it in the epilouge or maybe not. But I thought I could show it to you anyway.)

And for those who were (probably not) wondering, yes, I did take inspiration from these pieces of concept art.

I personally like the orange/red/pink colors here more than the purple dress they ended up giving her, but to each their own.

About the Character:

Asha is creative and loves to draw. But she has not alot of time drawing what she wants to draw, for she is almost always busy designing royal invitations. You see, everytime new people arrive to become citizens (that happens times almost every month), the royals celebrate everyone's arrival with a party at the end of the week. It is for this party that Asha has to design and draw all of the invitations for. But it's not that simple because her parents (espacially her dad) are perfectionists and so they are very picky. Asha usually has to come up with 10 designs before her parents are happy with one.

Asha has three different sketch-books, two of which she hides from her parents:

One for all the drawings she does for her parents,

One where she writes and draws plans and ideas down for when she's queen, (She rarely shows it to her parents)

And the third one is her diary. In that she writes all of her feelings. Shr mostly writes about how left out she feels: She's barely in any of the royal family portraits and she's not included in the statue of her family that stands in the city.

She does try to talk about it and while her parents do listen, they don't seem to take it seriously, saying things like that 'a princess shouldn't seek so much attention from others' or that 'she's too young' and that 'she needs to prove herself worthy first to deserve a part in the statue. Her parents clearly earned it because they fought in war and rebuild the kingdom, but she didn't do anything like that'.

So she tries everything to make her parents proud of her: She wears what they tell her to wear (her entire act 1 wardrobe is chosen by her parents, but not the cape), she draws what they tell her to draw (even if it means that she needs to draw behind her parents, and not next to them), she stops talking when her parents think that she talks to much. She even refuses to eat, just so that her father will finally be happy with her appearance.

But everytime her parents hug her, aknowledge her birthday (there were a few times where they did not celebrate it because of the "welcome-parties" that I mentioned earlier) or when they tell her that they love her, she finds new hope and believes that, one day, all her attempts will finally pay off.

During the run-time of the movie, Asha learns (with the help of her friends) to break free from her toxic parents, to fight for herself and others and that she is more than her parents made her herself think to be. She also discovers something that could potentially change her entire life forever...

-The End- I hope you enjoyed reading this!✨️

Tagging Time: @starss-artss @spectator-zee @rascalentertainments @your-ne1ghbor @dangerousflowerpanda

[pidgeon-queen]

Now that i have actually slept and didn't need to run errands anymore, I am finally watching season 2 of Arcane. For anyone who didn't see my last post on season 1, just a bit of inforalmation.

This is my thoughts and opinions on the characters, questions that seem unanswered, and looking at reasons behind characters actions, but not excusing them.

Season 2

Episode 1

It works well for the scene, but the static in the opening made me think my computer was busted. What a way to start off a season.

Point again on why I blame Jayce for everything. Victor knew he was dying, and explained they had to get rid of the hexcore because it was too dangerous. Victor always knew he was dying and Jayce decided to not grant him the mercy of death. I know this has consequences later on.

That little girl leaving the flowers is supposed to be Marcus's daughter, right? That is the only reason I could think or for her to have color why everything else is a charcoal sketch. The first 5 minutes has such beautiful art.

Salo seemed like the kind of person to be completely uninterested in anything but the perks of his job. Even with the death of the other council members, this argument doesn't sound like his words. I think Amvessa got in his head first

I am curious about Caitlyns father and why he acts as he does in both seasons. I feel like their could be more development as to who he is outside of her father and the husband of a former council member.

It took Vi all season to finally accept what others were saying. And even then, I think she is still wrong. It's not the Powder she remembers. Powder matured in a different environment than Vi and that is who she became. It just added a name change.

Who's this homeless enforcer? He sounds vaguely like Vander, and if i squint while exhausted, could almost look like Vander and Benzo combined.

Jayce put Victor in a chrysalis and it looks kind of creepy. Also, the fact that it reached out to Mel, i wonder if it would have eaten her like it did Sky. If things were different, I could see Jayce, Mel, and Victor working together in a different way that probably wouldn't have included Victor becoming part of the hexcore.

I'm glad Heimerdinger was kicked off the council because i am worried he wouldn't have survived.

Maddie Nolan is really suspicious. I wonder if Caitlyn actually said all of that. I am more interested in this fake drunkard than what Mel has to say. He has a story, and I worry I won't get to know what it is.

I've seen images of the counselors statue, but i thought it was only two of them.

There is a distinct lack of blood when it comes to more serious injuries. Someone got ripped by a chainsaw and there was nothing, but a bloody nose is fine.

They really left Jayce to die. He didn't even pick a good weapon, or go for the other nose tube. That had an affect Her.

The enforcers with Maddie, they didn't get an name, but definitely deserved one before this fighting. Same with Homeless.

Once again, Vi and Jayce working together to fuck up one shot.

I can see why Vi joined the enforcers, Caitlyn is losing it and doesn't know how to stop what is happening. Vi has been fighting her whole life and learned how to cope and plan. Fuck her for turning on her people the way she does, and what method she uses, but I understand the thought process of joining.

Caitlyn really chose to break the genevia convention laws using her mother's creation that was meant to save children of the undercity from the same fate as Victor.

What is with the special task force and their weapon choices. I get the sniper as Caitlyn is good with it, but Maddie has what looks like a toy gun from the arcade in season 1, and Homeless has a shield. Give him a brass knuckle as least so he has some way to fight back. It doesn't even need to be hextech. This specialized force has 2 unnamed characters still.

Why did Singed need to gas wolves? I know there is a reveal later on, but seriously, what did they ever do to you? The scars came from the explosion that killed Milo and Calgger. Animals did nothing to you.

Episode 2

This beginning is a reminder of the shape of water ending. This is another scene where they are leaning away from a father-daughter relationship and towards something else. I am pretty sure that's not what they wanted. Is it weird to hope the monsters in the bottom of the water ate Silco?

Good on Isha biting hard enough to cut through skin. I love her design. She also took Jinx up on the offer of a family and I never saw someone talk about that. Please other people talk about it.

The gray is so interesting. I can't wait to learn more.

Sevika is the middle ground between Vander and Silco. She just doesn't have the same kind of charisma they did. She also didn't have to be so terrible with the screwdriver. Angle your hand and body a little more and it would have been fine. She might have needed more help if the bolt was in too tight, but she chose not to hold it at a better angle.

Jinx comment about the eye shot is definitely from her perspective of Silco having her help, but i do still wonder if he wouldn't do it alone because he added shimmer to it and caused a physical reaction compared to before in season one when he had no problem in the room with Singed.

The sign of a bad leader is seeing everything collapse immediately after you disappear or die. Things could have continued if Vander left and Benzo took over, but Silco took charge and left an unstable legacy to collapse in his absence.

Victor hearing Sky's voice just proves to me the hexcore ate her. Jayce really couldn't let go, and it broke Victor. He doesn't look human anymore, and i can see the resemblance people make to him being Jesus. Jayce hasn't been given time to process and he is going to regret what he's done. Shame he can't see it sooner.

Ekko should have only been worried about capacity issues, then someone came and fucked with the tree. He needs a break.

I love Heimerdinger. He is 300 flyers old, but he is acting like a teen sneaking through his place. I needed this laugh after the previous episode. Where is Heimerdinger's pet? I miss him.

The offensive Ekko takes to tea.

This is the first time Vi has probably thought about Claggor in years. I wished we heard her or saw her facial reaction to it. I mentioned in my last post, but Vi is a shitty person when I comes to comforting others and how she reacts to loss without someone to comfort her.

I love Sevika's new arm and how it so clearly was made by Jinx, proving they will still work together, and how it is just an trade toy as well. That is some insane violence for someone who has never fought with the arm before. Why is Isha poking him? Leave the rat alone.

I'm starting to suspect Victor going to the undercity is what cause the arcane to affect Ekko's tree. That is definitely not Victor anymore. Why would he think to do something like that. How could he have know to heal others when Sky was killed by the same thing. The symbolism is a little on the nose.

Episode 3

Destroying you mother's legacy is not how you cope with loss Caitlyn. You ruined her memory like this and I know she is disappointed in you. This task force definitely had those hung and mutilated dolls coming. Who sacrifices the city just to maybe catch one person. It's the opposite affect you guys wanted.

The idea the gray gives him allergies.

The black rose has some interesting powers. The hissing, second voice is something I live for in storytelling. It's a shame I don't know how to write it in a way people pick up on.

Again, everyone doesn't seem to believe 2 identities can exist in one person. Vi also begged Caitlyn to not change when she herself changed. Whay a hypocrite.

Of course Salo is using shimmer.

Mel using her influence and is slowly losing it because Ambessa suddenly showed up. If Ambessa wasn't here, she might have more control over the situation in piltover.

I theorized that the arcane was living, by my comments of it eating Sky, I hope you understood that, but to see the story going in that direction kind of makes me smile. I suck at theories, but I guessed something right.

I love Jinx loving art but not being a protege.

Again, Jayce is at fault for deciding to not care about the undercity. Kiramman's sponsored Jayce and I would be surprised of Caitlyn's mother didn't warn him if she was the one to insisted the undercity deserved to breathe. I wonder if he either didn't listen to her, or she didn't get an say in how it was constructed. Either way, Jayce indirectly chose to sacrifice the undercity because he didn't care to think.

Heimerdinger, why would you risk touching that spot on the ground. Just tell everyone what you found first.

Vi chose this moment to not blame herself for the one thing she is definitely to blame. Caitlyn had to tell her they were using the Gray and Vi said yes, gas my people. Let me become what I hated and justify it by blaming Jinx.

Jayce really messed up with not understanding the arcane before trying to control it. And he is fucking up a fight. He felt it do something to his hammer, and still touches it.

Caitlyn doesn't seem to notice her gun breaking the laws of reality outside of being electrocuted. That is interesting.

Jinx is laying on the alter table about to be sacrificed in front of the undercities goddess. The goddess eyes look like they are glowing. I think that is why Caitlyn, who is known to be a great shot, couldn't shoot shit in that moment.

Piltover did need a makeover, and outside of it possibly releasing the gray into Piltover, I aprove of the method.it looks fun.

Vi still cares about the young people of the undercity, and it is proven in that scene where she stopped Caitlyn and let Jinx go to protect the child. The one thing I don't understand is how Caitlyn could be so willing to shoot a child when the only thing she successfully shot off was Jinx's finger. That is a big difference between her and Jayce. Isha would have just been collateral, while the boy Jayce killed was a complete accident. It does bring up, however, that Vi was fine with the kids in the shimmer factory ending up in the crossfire, but not Isha. Isha knew what she was doing jumping in the middle of the fight just like the kid who pulled the alarm. But Vi had a different reaction.

More evidence that Vi and Caitlyn are a very unhealthy and toxic relationship. Vi is in a similar position to Powder, and this time, nobody tried to come back for her. While not death, she again has nk comfort and is slowly breaking.

The artistic way the black rose is used is wonderful. I hate we only had a couple of minutes at best of that scene with Mel.

Please stop showing me Homeless and give me his name and backstory.

Ambessa chose Caitlyn because itbis the best way for the people to trust Noxian soldiers, and i think the people needed trust in someone who wasn't part of the council. Why does Maddie join in so quickly? Who is she really? And Homeless knows something. I want his lore in Arcane. I should mention I don't play league of legends, so there is a good chance a lot of lore and Easter eggs go over my head.

Singed will die long before Warwick is given enough blood.

Episode 4

Caitlyn sucks at her job. All of these people joined a cause Junx unintentionally created and she doesn't really hide herself. I basic cloth that sometimes doesn't cover her braids, making noise in the old arcade and fighting with extreme violence and enforcers keep arresting the wrong people.

Time has definitely passed based on the opening so this isn't like the next day, but I'm suspicious of Caitlyn and Maddie's relationship. Part of me thinks Maddie is a little obsessed with Vi and how she looked up to her, or it is Caitlyn she looked up to, and managed to get into a relationship with her in a moment of vulnerability, or caitlyn was looking for a rebound from a toxic relationship and Maddie was the girl who was there. Calling out Ambessa's words from Caitlyn is interesting. There is a certain look in her eyes that makes me wonder what Maddie is thinking.

I like how Isha is non verbal. Jinx knows how to communicate with her and shows Jinx is in her right mind.

If Jinx believes her name is dead, then what is her new name? You need to have something.

Ambessa doesn't know what Jayce did, and i think it is his fault nothing is working anymore.

Scar being there. That's it. Him seeing and being there.

"Why is peace always there justification for violence?" That's a good quote. We need more leaders to thank and answer this question.

How much time has passed? Ekko, Jayce, Mel, and Heimerdinger are all missing and time has passed enough for Mel be considered dead by some.

How did Sevika get in contact with the Firelights? Scar seems supportive of Jinx as he called for the people to fight at the checkpoint, but how did it come to that? Ekko is on the wall, but the firelights survived, so it is a sign he was a good leader. I wonder if he ever told Scar he still cared about Powder and if she ever gave him the chance, he would still save her.

Isha's fist do nothing, but she did her best and I am proud of her. Question, does Isha not get a name until 23 minutes into episode 4? I know her name from spoilers, but i think that's the first time she is given a name in the show.

Singed knowing they won't stay long but i doubt he knows how safe the Zaunites really are when Warwick arrives.

I love Sivika and Jinx being more buddy buddy this season. She's really really pissed that someone hated her pants. Then some creepy actually hitting on her.

She barely interacted and went into hiding, but they all somehow knew not to call out cheers or speak, just acknowledge her as a thanks. And the Woman who flirted with Claggor added Her aunt status to Jinx as well.

Do you see Jinx as an older sister to Isha, or a mom? I thought older sister based on some spoilers, but i can see a mom figure as well.

Going back to the chainsaw with no blood. Why was Warwick able to cause so much damage and spray blood like that?

Did Isha say Mama?

Warwick still has Vanders facial structure. And it proves to me Homeless looks like Vander.

Episode 5

Look, I was just thinking about Homeless.this guy still hasn't learned how to take a punch or at least protect his jaw as it's the weakest part on him.

Vi, how do you fuck up bad enough Homeless gives up on you?

Look at Jinx following her sister's footsteps. Fake tattoos and name written under her eye.

Ambessa survived, but i wouldn't be surprised if she faked her death so Warwick would leave her alone.

Caitlyn is still making the same mistakes as before. Going places she really shouldn't alone.

I don't know what to say about Signed so we are skipping over it.

Poor Mel seeing someone she cared for killed by the black rose. Imprisonment Socks. I wonder if she might change the way the prisons are run if she gets the chance. I do not believe she couldn't see him before he stepped i to the light. If that was supposed to be true, then the lighting should have been different.

Why would Jinx eat something you have to claim to get glowing

Vi really doesn't know what is going on. "Bitch mitten" are something I love. As well as that slap. Vi really hurt the kid she protected from Caitlyn.

Caitlyn can't even make a dungeon to hold people. She doesn't know what she is doing.

Mel's brother has a couple of close up to his eyes, and for a moment to, it looked like there was something in the pupil. Arcane doesn't show reflections in others eyes often.

"No mention of his crime." Caitlyn, can you guess based on his lab? Or do you really need an answer?

Isn't it implied that Singed removed his daughters heart for one reason or another?

Rose Mel's eyes looked so beautiful. Does Mel possess magic and that is subconsciously what drew her to Jayce and his research.

The memory of Vander with Silco and The girls mother. the casual replacement of alcohol with juice. Good Job Vander. Also, why did she suddenly decide Vander and Silco would raise her kid. She has a husband. Make him raise Vi first.

Both deserve the chance to heal. Isha and Vander are a part of that.

Salo, stop being creepy and dead. Bodies don't get to keep moving after you stop breathing. He sounds like Victor even before his mind took over Salo's body.

Jayce finally learner. And Heimerdinger was right. I wish we got to see a different angle your Salo's death. It looked pretty cool.

Another point to why this is all Jayce's fault. He chose to keep Vicgor alive, and look what that has done. You now have to physically kill Victor. Should have listened the first time. Should have never brought magic to piltover.

Episode 6

How does Victor say it's not Jayce and there is something else when He isn't even himself and keeps talking to the disembodied voice of Sky, who was eaten by the hexcore.

Vi really left hextech on the ground for anyone to take. Place of peace or not, I could sell that stuff

Grandpa Vander. I love him so.

Warwick knows there is something wrong with Victor. But he is trying to his kids.

I love Jinx and her comments and throwing shade.

Another beautiful artstyle showing their past. Jinx did deserve to have more time with her mom.

Vi talks about staying in Victor's place, but completely ignored that Ekko had the firelights trying to do the same thing. The difference, however, is Victor removes their desire and individual agency, creating more of a hive mind. Ekko has more freedom and the people don't see him has a Harold, but equal to each other.

There are 2 groups trying to fuck over Vander and his chances at a family again. Jayce unknowing because he is trying to fix his mistake, finally, and Ambessa who just wants war.

Caitlyn really wiped that spit into her mouth. Madam, you are in a relationship with Maddie. Stop that.

It took not being with Jayce for Vi to not fuck up. Let's see if not being around Vi helps Jayce, or still fucks everything up.

So far, he didn't kill a child. So maybe that's good.

Yes Vander! Protect your daughter.

Jayce didn't either. Vi and Jayce just need to not work together if they want to do anything in life.

This is what happens when you kill the leader of the hive mind. And unfortunately, Jayce is the reason Vander lost all humanity he had left. He's crying and suffering.

Victor didn't need to speak such truth.

Isha, sweetheart. No.

In a more serious note, I heard somewhere the reason tour life flashes before you life before you die is because your brain is looking for a memory to help deal with the event and save you, but since it has never experienced death, there is no immediate memory to help. I will sob silently for Isha, but every happy memory she had was with Jinx, do I believe, are the only memories she has. Trauma pushed away the bad ones so all her brain can do is show her the happy ones before her death.

Episode 7

Starting off with the record. It's not Vi and Jinx.

Ekko without face paint is a shock. But him actually seeing Benzo again. This might be the first time he thinks about what happened that day. Oh it hurts. I still see Homeless in Benzo's face, but i think it's more the sideburns.

This does explain why Jayce is the only one to escape in act 2. And proves Jayce did NOT eat Ekko and Heimerdinger like some people theorized.

I actually yelled seing Milo. I wasn't ready to see him with a posh accent and a mustache. I didn't yelled, but wtf! Heimerdinger with a guitar? Ekko is losing it.

So the answer to the time they were missing was 3 years. I thought it was weeks or a few months.

Jayce left his hammer in a place he doesn't know to chace a stranger who could hurt him. And he finds the remainds of a destroyed Piltover.

See! It's all Jayce's fault. Granted, Vi died, but she isn't that great of a person anyways.

Is this Heimerdinger singing at 13 minutes? That would be pretty funny. Watching...... it is!

So hextech almost existed, but Vi died in the explosion and Jayce lost everything because nothing got stolen. Still doesn't change the fact it was his fault for bringing the crystals to Piltover. It's a good thing that is where Ekko and Heimerdinger landed or we really wouldn't see them again.

Where did Jayce end up? How did he hang on with those things

I really don't think i could have done it. They look terrifying.

Ekko has his time skill! I do think the time in this reality is what gives Ekko the chance later on to try again with Jinx. His chances to tell Benzo the truth and actually say goodbye.

Seconds later, Ekko forgets this isn't his universe and makes the same mistakes as asking Powder if it's her fault this Vi was killed.

There is a screenshot worthy point around the 30 minute mark of Milo and Clagger. I hope someone has do that. It needs to be memorialized.

Powders dress reminds me of the moonflower for some reason when she spins.

Finally, Timebomb fans! Be fed!

If Heimerdinger dies....

Powder better get her Ekko back...

She does! Now what happened to Heimerdinger

Oh an episode almost solely for Ekko, finally making up for lost time.

Episode 8

We return to Mel and her magic i forgot about with everything else that was going in. She was controlling the other counselors throught their corruption. I guessed that right. Yay.

What is Mel going to do now?

It is interesting how they bury the people.

Vander needs to be left alone. He's been through enough.

I knew it was a hive mind.

Homeless is Back! When was his name Lois? I was close at least. (I'm not watching with subtitles so unless the speak the names, I have no idea who people are).

"We can't erase our mistakes." Yeah, like you gassing the innocent?

Jinx has lost everything, her family has been lost 4 different times. She finally gave up after losing Vander again, and losing Isha.

Mel and Jayce meeting again after their separate imprisonments. Mel finally being called out on her control. And being blamed for something she could t control.

Where did Victor's new body come from. This fight scene reminds me of the I, Robot based on Victor's movements.

It is nice to see an actual conversation between Silco and Jinx without it pushing her towards his goal of Zaun.

Break the cycle with broken knuckles. Nice on Vi.

This creature. The fact Jayce still sees it as living. Should have been labeled thing.

Heimerdinger's pet! I missed it.

Caitlyn. What about Maddie? ..... vie doesn't care, but that doesn't make Caitlyn a shitty person for cheating.

Even with the arcane, Victor never love Sky the way she did. How dare he take everything from Vander. He has died enough, why take the memories away too?

Episode 9

Oh boy, here we go.

Jinx has beautiful hair. Long and short.

Ekko is back and he is trying. I am so proud of him.bittersweet(X) as long as their alive in the end, I think i can accept the ending of the series. But I just got through the intro so good so we will see.

Maddie has to be working with Ambessa.

Maddie put the nail in, didn't she? Maybe she deserved to be cheated on. I didn't think she really loved Caitlyn in the beginning. I was just wrong about it being obsessive... death works too.

Jinx and Ekko working on the same side as it should be. Welcome Zaunites to the party. Thanks for bringing it.

Victor looks so gross.

Not Sevika! She grew on me.

Do you think Vi finally understood it wasn't just her and Jinx left? Do you think she will finally remember Ekko and continue to care about him in the future?

Mel's story so so much more complex than season 2 had time to delve into. I do. Ot understand the black rose as much i they probably wanted us to.

They still leave Ekko alone and assumed dead. Even after he did so much to save them both.

Ekko is the only one. Jayce is gone too. How will he try?

Yes ekko!!!!!! Some risks must be made.

That is an interesting callback to what Jayce saw in the alternate universe and explains what he meant.

I may have to ammend my statement a bit. Not by much though. Victor is the instigator for the use of hextech. But I thought that's where it started. Is it more accurate to blame this on Victor?

We once again see Vi not coping with dead and lacking a comfort. Her failure to listen and move resulted in Jinx having to jump down. It is a shame Vi couldn't learn better ways of coping outside of self destruction and lashing out immediately.

I hate we don't see Ekko actually go back to the firelights or see him step as a leader for Zaun we all know he easily could have been.

Now that everything is over, I will go back to my question 3 paragraphs above. Should Victor now be the blame for all of this? As he gave the rune to Jayce knowing he was the only one who could show something good from emotion and resistance. This goes against my firm belief that, as adults, you are responsible for your actions, and your actions alone. Your actions have an affect on others as seen in life and Arcane. Victor planted the seed of thought and useless chip in Jayce as a young boy. Jayce, however chose illegal research and storing dangerous and illegal contraband in his room unsecured.

This answer can only be found by looking into another question. How important were Jayce and his mother's lives? His mother would have died without arcane magic, and as he was a child, Jayce may have too. Allowing him to die young would have meant Jayce could bring the crystals to Piltover, and his house wouldn't have been robbed. Nothing in Arcane would have gone the same way. Say young Jayce would have survived and made it to Piltover, he still wouldn't have interacted with magic and see it can be harnessed by someone without being born with it, and his research probably wouldn't have been different. Who knows if he would have gone to the undercity then, but it grunted his house wouldn't have exploded because of the crystals. If all characters must be alive and Victor's past self needed to save Jayce, then it is my same argument. Jayce shouldn't have brought contraband to Piltover and not secure it and hide it.

There is a note to add that if Victor didn't give the chip to Jayce after saving his mother, then maybe Jayce wouldn't have found the crystals, but I disagree. He would have been searching still. I don't doubt he wouldn't have found them on his own without a shards with an engraved rune as a reference piece.

Thanks everyone who actually read this far. I can now continue my doom scrolling here without worry of spoiling anything now.

[heretherebedork]

Curious to know your feels about the 1000 Years Old finale. You didn't post much about it. Maybe that's a commentary in and of itself LOL.

Part of the answer is that I struggle with watching things out of my usual schedule and had a very busy weekend so I'm just getting around to actually watching the finale episode after knowing all kinds of spoilers. I am actively writing this response as I watch the episode. So enjoy my live thoughts on your ask.

And, so far, my entire reaction is that they crammed way too much here in the end. They needed to spread this out more than they did and I get parts of it, I like having the soulmates reveal only at the very end...

But there's a lot of plot and seriousness that they just didn't touch on enough and that I think including in the rest of the show would have improved it greatly as well as helping with the pacing struggling most people had.

If more of the Janja plot had been genuinely spread through the show and more of these serious moments and the understanding of their agreement and relationship had started earlier I might care more about this. But I don't care about Janja at all! I just don't! I wasn't given reasons to care until the very end and that's not enough for me.

Also, having Yoh not fight for any of it really did disappoint me but the director of this show, as seen in multiple other shows they've done, seems to have a thing for one very passive character in the main relationship who will just Allow Things To Happen To Them without ever fighting back. And I never like that, frankly.

Yes, they dropped a few hints here and there but it just isn't enough to tie it all together in this show itself.

It's not a bad finale, it's not the worst, but the end of the show feels so rushed compared to the rest and us not getting all the fluffy times together only to be shown a single scene at the end of a long happy life instead of the time together that I want to see.

I like domesticity, not the end of domesticity.

I get why people liked this ending. I see how people who rewatch things, especially, will enjoy the recontextualization of the show.

But for me? It made everything feel rushed and the rest of the show feel almost empty and slightly worse in comparison. Either we needed more plot or less episodes for this to work.

(Every time I see Somchai I am sad we did not get Somchai and Shin. Every single time. Come on. You crammed this much into the final episode, you could have given me more of them somewhere else!)

Also, I love his random bodyguards, whoever they are. Love them.

Also, this year long time skip is stupid.

Seriously, I am deeply frustrated by Yoh literally finding out they're soulmates and then just... completely abandoning Pun and leaving entirely. It's not interesting to see him just give up and it makes him the most passive character ever. Which we also had in I Will Knock You and, frankly, in 2gether. That's just The Style.

JANJA LITERALLY TOLD YOH SHE WAS GIVING HIM PUN BECAUSE PUN WILL NEVER LOVE ANYONE ELSE. Whatever, at least the confession and whole thing is done and now they can be soulmates together.

9 minutes of happy ending is not enough. Absolutely not enough. Yes, it was cute. Yes, it was a happy ending. But it's just not enough and it leaves me wanting more and wishing that the show were paced differently.

(Still sad we couldn't get any more Somchai and Shin, we deserved more.)

Edit Okay, I didn't mention this originally but I actually hate that the soulmate/reincarnation line takes away the power of Yoh's gift to Pun being his first birthday present. It really bothers me because that moment was one of the my favorite moments and the finale just made it not matter at all and turned it into something much less important and takes away a lot of the importance away of Pun wearing the cross and it BOTHERS ME A LOT.

[aelius29]

Journey 's End

Pairings: Elf Wednesday X Hero Fem reader

Part 1/??

Part 2 -updated

Reminders: This will be A.U. A version from anime called Frieren: Beyond Journey's End.

So their personalities will be mix up and including their appearance.

Wednesday as Frieren

Y/n as Himmel

Enid as Heiter

Yoko as Eisen

Another reminder: Since it was A.U. their last name will be changed into this.

Wednesday Adamus - the mage elf

Y/n Celest - the hero

Enid Amilair - the priestess

Yoko Tana - the half dwarf warrior

A/n: This story will be based on few episodes of Frieren: Beyond Journey's End. And also since I was kinda bored and little bit stress from study. I just made it story my own. 😂✨

Wednesday Adamus - age of 1000+

Y/n Celest - age of 26

Enid Amilair - age of 25

Yoko Tana - age of 227

Wednesday Adamus P.O.V.

It seems our journey has finally come to an end after we defeated the Demon King. Right now, Y/n and I are walking in the street as she plans to buy me a reward for defeating the Demon King.

Given that it was just the two of us, we continued our exploration of the stalls and merchants along the street. The thoroughfare was alive with activity, and the savoury smells of roasted meats and sugary confections filled the air. Children darted past us, their carefree laughter and playful tag games creating an air of merriment, transforming the scene into something reminiscent of a lively festival. Enid and Yoko, meanwhile, were engaged in their own pursuits.

I glanced towards Y/n, noticing her scanning the stalls with a thoughtful expression.

Y/n, being the sociable person she is, seemed right in her element as she browsed the stalls and chatted with the traders.

Her smile widened as she stopped in front of a particularly colorful stall, her eyes fixed on a array of trinkets and jewelry.

"Hey, Wednesday," she said, glancing over at me. "Come take a look at this. See anything you like?"

I moved to join Y/n at the stall, examining the assortment of trinkets, jewelry and miscellaneous items on display. The baubles on the table glistened in the sunlight, their hues as vibrant and diverse as a spectrum of colors.

I didn't need anything material to be happy, but Y/n was clearly enjoying the process of browsing for a gift for me. So I indulgently scanned the items with a neutral expression.

"No," I answered simply, not seeing anything of interest.

Y/n chuckled, not surprised by my response. "I figured as much," she said, her tone resigned. "You never were one for material things."

Y/n redirected her focus to the stall, her eyes skimming over the array of luminous trinkets on display. She examined each item meticulously, picking them up and then setting them aside with a shake of her head.

She then moved to another stall, and I dutifully followed.

For whatever reason, her unwavering resolve to find a suitable present for me was oddly endearing.

I watched as she persistently sought out the perfect gift, her dedication almost comical. Although I harbored a general indifference towards materialistic possessions, I found myself silently amused

Having observed her dismiss several items, I couldn't help but offer a remark. "You are aware that you are not obligated to purchase anything for me, correct?" I inquired, my voice betraying a trace of amusement.

Y/n glanced over at me and responded with a playful grin.

"I know that," she said, mock offense in her tone. "But I 'want' to get you something. You deserve it after all we've been through."

She redirected her attention to the stall, her eyes once again sweeping over the merchandise on display. This time, her expression was more earnest, as if she was fixated on finding something worthy enough to be bestowed upon me.

A slight eye roll escaped me, accompanied by an repressed smile. Y/n’s steadfast determination could be both endearing and infuriating.

As she persisted in her quest, her expression growing more and more concentrated, I pondered what it might be that she was searching for. Something practical? Something sentimental? Or perhaps something entirely random. With her, it could be any number of things.

We proceeded to another stall as she continued her search, sighing in frustration. “Wednesday,” she said, “You can choose whatever you like.”

I raised an eyebrow, surprised by her sudden offer. "Are you sure?"

Y/n nodded, clearly tired of searching. "Yes, go on. Choose anything you like."

I took a moment to consider her offer. It was unusual for me to choose a gift, but if Y/n wanted to end this futile hunt, I wasn’t about to argue.

I turned my gaze towards the stalls, looking for something but I just pick it up randomly.

"That was quick, you should put more thought into it." She replied with a pout.

I couldn't help but smirk at her pout, knowing how much she wanted me to pick something ‘perfect’. “I don’t need more thought,” I replied dryly. “This is fine.”

I held up the ring for her to see. It was a simple silver ring, plain and unadorned. It didn’t have any jewels, but it has a flower called lotus, but it was sturdy and well-made.

Y/n studied the ring, her pout transforming into a look of surprised look in her face before she smile.

I raised an eyebrow at her reaction. "What?" I asked, my voice slightly defensive.

Y/n just chuckled and shook her head. "Nothing," she said, a gentle smile purse in her lips while she stare at the ring as holding it.

We started to walk, after y/n's pay the ring towards the old lady.

As we walked, I couldn't help but glance at Y/n, still confused by her reaction to the ring. It was an ordinary thing to me, nothing special. But her smile suggested there was something more to it.

"Why do you look so pleased?" I asked, my voice betraying a little curiosity.

"It's nothing," she replied softly, her gaze fixed on the ring as we continued to walk.

"Wednesday," she called this time, causing me to expect her to hand it back.

"Thank you," I replied, but then, as if in slow motion, she stepped forward and knelt before me, gently taking my hand in hers as we stood Infront of the clock tower.

With a soft smile, she then proceeded to slide the ring onto my ring finger.

I watched, stunned into silence, as she slipped the ring onto my finger.

For a moment, I simply stared at the ring, now a part of me. I wasn’t one for sentimental gestures, but this felt...different.

I looked down at Y/n, still kneeling before me, her smile unwavering.

"What are you doing?" I asked finally, my voice barely above a whisper.

Y/n smiled up at me, her eyes glimmering. Her answer was simple, but it held a weight that echoed in my chest.

"This ring," she said, her voice soft but steady, "Is a symbol. A symbol of our journey together."

She took my hand in both of hers, her fingers gently tracing the band of the ring.

"It's a symbol," she continued, her gaze never breaking from mine, "of what we've been through and what we’ve achieved. But most of all, it's a symbol of my promise to you."

Her actions had left me befuddled and her words sent a flutter of unfamiliar emotions coursing through me.

"Do you promise?" I asked, my voice quivering slightly.

Y/n responded with a resolute nod, her smile swelling with sincerity.

"Yes," she confirmed, "A promise that no matter what trials the future holds, I will remain at your side."

"But our groups will disperse after we defeat the Demon King," I reminded her. "In fifty years, I will set out on a journey alone. Will you still be waiting for me here when I return?"

Y/n nodded, her expression serious. "I am aware," she murmured softly. "However, it simply means that we must savor the time we have together to the fullest."

She gently squeezed my hand, not releasing her grip just yet. "And when your journey is complete and you return, I will be right here, steadfastly waiting for you."

There was a twinge of unease in my heart as her words settled in my mind. Fifty years was a considerable span for humans, and the possibilities of what could transpire within that timeframe were vast. For me, however, 50 years was merely equivalent to a handful of months - a stark difference in our respective lifespans.

"What if...you change your mind?" I voiced the thought that had been lingering in the back of my mind since she knelt before me.

Y/n shook her head, her eyes filled with unwavering determination. "I won't," she replied, her voice firm.

She squeezed my hand more tightly. "I promise you, Wednesday," she said, her gaze burning into mine. "I will wait for you. No matter how long it takes. I will wait for you to come back to me."

I held her gaze, searching her eyes for any sign of doubt or hesitation.

There was none.

I realized then that Y/n's commitment to me was as real and true as the ring on my finger. She wasn't just making a promise in the heat of the moment. She truly meant it.

I opened my mouth, my mind whirling to find a response, but no words came. Instead, I just continued to grip her hand, her declaration echoing in my heart.

Y/n seemed to understand my silence. She didn't push for an immediate response. She just held my gaze, her expression patient and understanding.

We stood there in the shadow of the clock tower, surrounded by the bustle of the city, yet somehow it felt like we were in our own private world.

The ring on my finger, Y/n's promise, her declaration of love... All of it combined was almost too much for me to process. It was unlike anything I had ever experienced before.

Yet, as I stared into Y/n's eyes, I realized that I didn't want to experience it with anyone else.

"You have utterly surprised me," I finally managed to find my voice, my words escaping in a softer tone than I had intended.

Y/n merely smiled in return, a slightly crooked but still warm smile gracing her features. "That was my intention," she replied, "I derive pleasure from catching you off guard."

I found myself unable to suppress the small, involuntary smile that tugged at the corner of my lips. This woman was undoubtedly capable of being my undoing, and strangely enough, I found myself oddly drawn to that fact.

Next soon... Part 2

A/n: hope you guys did enjoy reading my story ✨

Bonus: lotus ring represent 'eternal love' 💕🥹 from Frieren: beyond journey's end.

[little-paperboat]

Through Shadows To The Edge Of Night (3)

Here we goooo! Final chapter of "Through Shadows" is out, one day earlier than planned! 🧡 I'm super excited, it was so much fun to write! It's over 6,600 words too!! Twice as long as my usual chapters, which I didn't expect initially, but during the editing process I chose to merge the ending dialogue with another one that I had written for a later chapter, as I found it made more sense.

I'm glad that Tav and Rolan are finally having more interaction... and a little misunderstanding I was craving to write since the beginning, including that *one* scene that I imagined all those months ago and made me want to write this fic 😏

I hope you'll like it! The next part of the series will finally bring us to Baldur's Gate and to Sorcerous Sundries, and well, who knows what will happen then 👀 I'm planning to release it on next Saturday. You can follow the tag "series:forbidden fire" here on tumblr to not miss it when it comes out 🌸

And of course, I'm so grateful for all the comments, kudos and support! The Holy Rolan Empire is truly a gem, you guys are wonderful and it's super heartwarming to be part of such a kind community with so many talented artists and writers 🥹 ❤️

Read on AO3 (3/3)

Read Part 1: Wild Winds Are Death To The Candle (2/2)

She took a step towards him.

“Rolan?”

This broke him out of his stupor, his eyebrows perking up, frowning, and finally coming closer. Had he always been this tall?  

“Tav,” he replied sternly. 

Her name rolled off his tongue with ease, and something surged within her; wishing that he’d say it more often, whisper it against her skin, his lips caressing the shell of her ears— Wait, what? No! She had done so much for him, against her better judgement even, and he had been nothing but rude and a pain in the ass. No: she wouldn’t be so easily swayed. The ball was in his court, and her expectations were high. She wouldn’t be distracted by nonsense. 

She crossed her arms, unimpressed, trying to appear as nonchalant as possible.

“You brought them back,” he said finally, his eyes finding hers, a hint of hesitation colouring his deep voice. Once again, she found herself hypnotised by the golden flames dancing against the moonless sky of his eyes. “I thought my entire family was dead, and you… you brought us back together.” His voice was soft, almost emotional. She didn’t even know he could speak like this.

“Don’t mention it,” she croaked out. What was wrong with her? Gods, she needed to get a grip, now.  

“You have no cause to be humble. You did the impossible and you went out of your way to help us when most people would’ve left us to die - or worse.” 

Maybe she liked it better when he yelled at her, after all. At least it didn’t make her heart beat so fast. 

There was a pause, but before she could speak, he continued.

“I’ve lashed out at you, drunkenly and otherwise, and you helped anyway.” She fought back a smile, biting the inside of her cheeks to physically stop her lips from stretching. “You didn’t deserve that. I’m sorry. And, thank you.”

Was this real? Was this really happening? She tilted her head up at him and wished that she didn’t imagine his own gaze flickering to her lips. 

“Why are you being nice?” she asked in a hushed voice. 

“Because you were. I still don’t quite understand why you decided to help us - to help me, but you did.” He seemed to remember something, and handed her a small purse. “It’s only right that you get something in return.” 

A bag of gold sat in the palm of his hand, heavy and full. She paled, suddenly ill at ease. Was he giving her his savings? 

“Rolan, no. I can’t accept it.” It was absurd. Actually, it was offensive.  

His eyes darkened. 

“No? Is that not good enough for you?”

“On the contrary, it’s way too much. Really, I… I don’t need gold. I don’t, I swear.” 

She didn’t know how to explain to him that the sum he was handing her was probably less than her weekly allowance as a teen. 

Not that she was the kind of selfless person who refused to be paid for her services. Quite the opposite, actually: half her life so far had been dedicated to finding ways of getting and spending money, without any concern in the world for those who didn’t have any.  

But, well. Being catapulted in the middle of a refugee camp without any gold piece to spare had somewhat altered her perspective, and now she did feel bad about taking money from people in need when she knew her own coffers were still overflowing at home.

“I don’t need a reward,” she continued. “You keep it, for you, and Lia and Cal, for when—” 

“Take it, Tav.” He cut her, annoyance sharp in his voice. Clearly, he would obviously feel beyond insulted if she refused it, but at the same time, she really didn’t need it. Although, it could benefit the group, if only temporarily…

She chewed on her bottom lip, indecisive, before reluctantly taking the coin purse from him, swearing to herself that she’d find a way to give it back somehow. Her obedience seemed to please him, and he gave her a satisfied smirk that ignited a fire in her belly, a violent desire coursing through her veins. 

She wanted to know how his lips would feel against hers, how his body would react to her touch; to see pleasure etched over his handsome features and to hear him say all those nice things again, and then some. To see him happy, pleased; to make him lose his composure and show him how good it would feel to not be a stuck-up prick.  

She wanted to kiss him - she really did. 

And she wanted it now, even if he hated her. 

She had dealt with worse than that. 

“I didn’t tell Cal and Lia about what happened,” she said instead, inching just a bit closer, batting her eyelashes just so - giving him that one sultry look that always got her tangled in bedsheets under an hour. 

“I know,” he said with a strained smile. 

“You’re welcome,” she teased.   

He let out a breathy laugh.

“I thanked you once already. Don’t be greedy.” 

A glint of mischief burned in his eyes and she felt herself smirk, the flames of desire burning brighter. Oh, she was greedy alright - all she needed was a sign that he wasn’t just being polite, something, anything to let her know that he was also curious about her, and she would show him exactly just how greedy she could be.

— Read the rest on AO3 :)

(c) divider by saradika

[jedeirri]

Right, I feel like writing a bit of a retrospective.

Dragon age veilguard is a fun and good game. It is also less than the sum of it's parts.

Some unsorted bits I liked:

All the companions were very strong, well written characters. I love how they interact with each other at the lighthouse, and how their relationships develop over the course of the game. Standout companion quests were Taash and Emmerich. I really liked the level design, and thought the gameplay was fun (though I personally prefer the strategy heavy method of earlier games), and I highly approve of the decision to get rid of things like inventory management. From the perspective of an action game I couldn't think of many improvements actually.

All the sidequest are really good - no fetch quests! And they all add to the world, and are highly rewarding. The main story is pretty good as well, not Shakespeare, but I liked it, and despite how few decisions from previous games were considered, the decisions carried over had monumental impact on the story, so I'm actually ok with this choice.

this leads me into the things I liked less, and into spoiler territory

I loved the character of Bellara, and I romanced her, and I'm happy with this choice, but her companion quest was so generic it genuinely makes me sad. She deserves better than this.

Another thing I didn't like (which many others have already said) was how little impact Rooks identity had on the story. I intentionally made them as Dalish as possible, in hopes to get more connection to the plot, but not only seemed other characters to not really register them as elven unless they pointed it out, but also when I tried to bring companions with backgrounds relevant to the quests, it didn't really seem to matter. In a way, it might have been easier to make rook a specific person, like Hawke.

I was also really hoping that the choices I made in the end of the companion quests would have an impact on the story, but that didn't really happen.

Lastly, and I know this is one of the most common criticisms of this game, but the romance was... weird, and I heard that this was true for the others too. Like Bellara asked me if we were dating after I flirted with her a few times, and I said yes and she said yay! And then the dialogue ended, and like three quests later she's like are you sure we're dating, and I'm like yeah and she hugs me awkwardly, and I can't talk to her for the next three days. And then the final romance scene was really sweet (though I almost missed it! I got her kidnapped and went back and refought Ghila'nain so I'd have a chance at the only good love scene) all I'm saying is she deserved better (and I did too)

Also yes I know everyone says this but sometimes all of rook's dialogue choices are identical. Why have a choice at all.

anyway, I'm done nitpicking. let's get to where I hope this goes next:

So I liked Dragon Age 4: More Dragon Age, and I hope they will soon make a Dragon Age 5: Even More Dragon Age.

I would like said game to include more player choices than this one, but maybe not as many as previous games. I think I'd like cameos of all the (surviving) companions, and their quest outcomes to matter for this. I'd like to see the political implications of all this - this game did have a woeful lack of this, and I'm looking forward to bioware overcompensating in the next run. And I'd like it to be set in a part of Thedas that Sucks. Maybe with fewer choices but more fallout thereof.

Final verdict: yeah would recommend. Good game. Don't expect it to be something it isn't.

Also, isn't it fucked up that you can kill both Assan and Manfred?

[thesinglesjukebox]

SOPHIE ELLIS-BEXTOR - "MURDER ON THE DANCEFLOOR" (2001) (2024)

23 years on and this groove's still got some life in it...

[7.11]

Thomas Inskeep: Sophie Ellis-Bextor should've been the next Kylie — and for a couple years, almost was. Her 2001 debut album Read My Lips spun off a trio of top 3 singles in the UK, including this one, which has over time become her true classic. Dua Lipa's entire career was birthed in this single, the dictionary definition of ebullient dance-pop. (It's fitting that Lipa's "Houdini" is currently the most-played song on UK radio as this single is re-ascendant.) SEB has never gone anywhere: she's still making music, touring (based on her 2022 Sophie Ellis-Bextor's Kitchen Disco (Live at the London Palladium), she still sounds great), and is now a DJ on BBC Radio 2. She just didn't become the massive pop star she deserved to be. Now, thanks to its placement in a climactic scene in Saltburn, her greatest single is getting its flowers, climbing back up to #2 in the UK (so far — my fingers are crossed it can make it that final notch higher). "Dancefloor" still sounds fresh, certainly fresher than the glut of '90s-sampling dance-pop dominating the UK charts. This single sparkles, SEB giving a knowing wink as she sings, especially on the line "gonna burn this goddamn house right down." She knows what she's doing here: making magic.   [10]

Edward Okulicz: I bought this on single back in 2002, which tells you something (other than that I am old): it was an irresistible bit of sparkly disco radio pop back in the day. Move it forward or backwards a few years and it might have been an indie rock song for someone else, a filter house record, or (gulp) a Ronan Keating record. Fortunately that never occurred, and it's a delight to see a classic gain new fans from age groups and territories that didn't get it on saturation rotation. Part of it's the solid song by Gregg Alexander, who at his best was a master craftsman of a much-maligned form. Another part of it's the much nimbler, slinky production compared to the rest of his soft-rock oeuvre. And a very, very large part of it is the Debbie-Harry-but-English pose of Ellis-Bextor, too cool to do anything but be filmed dancing from the waist up while she stomps her heel into your eardrums. "Murder" really has everything — a catchy chorus, the tinniest guitar solo ever, hooks that fall as much off the words as the melody — and so is perfect for every occasion, even a movie I am never, ever going to see.  [10]

Alfred Soto: Like the Pet Shop Boys' "Rent," waaayyyy too good for Saltburn — perhaps Emerald Fennell thought their incandescence would rub off on her as if it were glitter. Part of a vanished climate of French house-inspired crossover pop like Kylie Minogue's "Love at First Sight," Sophie Ellis-Bextor presages Katy B's regular-person anonymity: she surveys the strings and rhythm guitar licks like a party hostess keeping an eye on the band while sipping her prosecco. [8]

Alex Clifton: I haven't seen Saltburn and frankly have no interest in it, but this film has led to the Sophie Ellis-Bextor renaissance which is a net good for society. "Murder on the Dancefloor" is just brilliantly composed and produced; it feels as fresh today as it did twenty years ago. There are so many thrilling little moments from Ellis-Bextor's vocal delivery: the way her voice curves into "about your kiiiiiind," the little rasp in "there may be others," the little trill of "dancefloor" in the bridge. I feel so biased writing this review because I've literally been listening to this song since I was a kid, but I'm so jazzed about "Murder" finally receiving the love it deserves.  [10]

Ian Mathers: How can you not love pop music when it'll randomly do things like this, suddenly giving us a song to review from before the earliest days of the Jukebox, that is here purely because of its use in a movie that I have not seen but am informed was probably picked on the basis of Ellis-Bextor's plot arc in the music video. And if I'm not willing to go to bat for it quite as hard as I would for "Running Up That Hill," I did love "Murder on the Dancefloor" in 2001 and it still sounds great now. I don't find myself having any reaction more complicated than happiness at hearing it again and that particular joy of people liking something you like. [8]

Nortey Dowuona: If you told me this came out in 2021 and Emerald Fennell asked Sophie to use it in her movie set in 2001 because it was just that on point in depicting the time, I would agree. Then after taking out my phone, I'd be punched in the face and meekly give up my phone. Then, after watching you sprint into a nightclub, I'd immediately thank goodness you didn't ask for the passcode and run like hell for the closest subway. I am three stops from home before I remember this did not actually come out in 2021; there are other Sophie Ellis-Bextor songs and jailbreaking is a thing now. [10]

Leah Isobel: RIP Mark Fisher. You would've written a hell of a blog post about Saltburn. [7]

Mark Sinker: Necessary digression 1: heraldry as a science in Europe is roughly 900 years old, a bright and stylised easy-read guide, highly rule-bound and policed, to class and land and title — which is to say to material history (its jargon-field is still mostly words not otherwise used in the UK since the 14th century; even property law is less lousy with extinct Norman French terms). And like many very aged things, it has necessarily also passed through phases and fashions, as technologies of display arrive and depart. In fact the first inkling I had that I wasn’t going to get on with Saltburn was the typeface chosen for the title on-screen at the outset. It’s a font with a fairly specific ill-set ungainliness to it: it wants to have the weight of "pleasingly and weirdly old; not how we do things now," but it might just as well be some off-the-peg super-modern studio confection — or even (though I slightly doubt this) something custom-fashioned purely for the film. There’s no discernible care to the choice. Necessary digression 2: back in the late '70s when Peter Saville was busily and insouciantly borrowing from this or that actual-real document or design, of such-and-such era, part of the point was the severity of the decontextualisation — except there was a rigour to the carelessness. The item was being supplied with an iconicity (the very word) pulling you in towards whatever the item was that Factory Records was then placing on the market. The surface glamour of the original was to be funneled through in such a way that its weight amplified only the new relationship. In fact (in its stylised easy-read way) Saville’s work was ruthlessly the opposite of heraldry, so very good at managing the ambient melancholy that suffuses the wider Factory moment; all the blocks and counterspells necessary to conjure here beyond the end of creative time as the context for the music to have presence. Anyway, long story short (lol) Saltburn – which would love to believe it has accessed the aura, for example, of the cover of New Order’s Technique — is attempting to juggle the same double burden. It wants to conjure a play between the decontextualised pull of 24-hour-party-people hedonism and the real ineluctable unremovable weight of actual history and actual class and actual land and actual title. Except for its story to work it needs both dimensions (hedonism and weight; heraldry and careless scribble) to register, as Saville absolutely didn’t. No block, no counterspells, nothing to dampen the disturbances — so when poor old Sophie EB’s voice and poise are scalpeled out of their 20-year-old chart context and abruptly c/p-ed into whichever late-stage scene it is, well, here they are, as a clumsy synopsis (calculation, side-eye, dancing, death) the structure really shouldn’t require, in a role the song is the wrong mood (a faintly gauche trifle, a chirpy hustle) to deliver. The movie never works out where it gets its deep reveal from, or what shape its politics are (if politics is even a useful word here). Ill-set ungainliness all over again: the carelessness floods back into the borrowed adornment, and breaks it in pieces. I don’t even love this song that much but I hate how it gets what value it has so gracelessly driven out of it.  [2]

Jacob Satter: At the risk of killing the groove, this is a pretty boring choice for a manufactured revival track. Call me back when the kids discover "It's In Our Hands." [4]

Jacob Sujin Kuppermann: I'm glad everyone's having fun here but the more I try to enjoy this — either on its own terms or as an icon of nostalgia — I get nothing. Unremarkable in any year. [4]

Lauren Gilbert: It was a [10] in 2001, it's still a [10] now. [10]

Katherine St. Asaph: The thing about it being 2024 is that in the intervening 20-plus years since "Murder on the Dancefloor" came out, approximately ninety million more disco-revival tracks came out. Some of them are by Sophie Ellis-Bextor, even. And so many of those tracks are smooth where this is stiff, magisterial where this is timid (and not in a winsome Katy B kind of way; Katy got better arrangements), charged where this is inert and just generally unmurderous. It's actually startling how inessential this sounds by comparison. [3]

Oliver Maier: Even as a youth, before my brain was burdened with indulgent critical vocabulary, I felt like this song just didn't work. I can't pin down whether "Murder" is knowingly a little chintzy (dare I say camp?) or if it's just cheap tat trying sincerely to sound boutique. Benefit of the doubt granted or not, Ellis-Bextor sounds like she's doing karaoke off the sofa. [4]

Michael Hong: When Ellis-Bextor pauses, it's easy, like a quick and graceful end to a conversation rather than the expectant response to her more spirited word choice. She's committed to this casualness, easily slipping away at the hint of a faux pas, which makes the occasional lingering word more charming. "About your kind," she sings, as if looking you up and down, wondering if she's got it wrong this time; the word "others" is trailed as if she's daring you to eliminate the competition. In that way, "you better not kill the groove," delivered with such nonchalance, becomes a fervid instruction. [7]

Will Adams: It's cute, Sophie is ever-charming, but there's real problem when you've got songs in your catalog with titles like "Bittersweet" and "Heartbreak Make Me a Dancer" that offer way more palpable drama than the one with the word "Murder." [5]

Joshua Minsoo Kim: Every other line is threatening here. “Stay another song,” “Don’t think you’ll get away,” “You better not kill the groove.” Sophie Ellis-Bextor isn’t demanding fear, though. That’s what makes “Murder on the Dancefloor” so irresistible: she sounds like a friend, albeit one who’s deathly serious about having a good time. When you hear her, you believe it can be this good for you too. [8]

Taylor Alatorre: Wow. They were allowed to make these slick disco-pop reimaginings with actual guitar solos back then? We must retvrn. [8]

Tara Hillegeist: It feels like a time capsule from another era in pop music entirely, because it is. There was a time when Ellis-Bextor's stately, imperial, nigh-inhuman precision of a delivery felt like nothing so much as the edifice within which pop star royalty could be crowned, particularly in the world of UK pop; it's still hard, even now, to deny the simple pleasures of someone who knows what her job is and then executes it flawlessly. But it's been over two decades since this song originally bowed, and it must be said that it was the impact of songs like, yes, "Murder" itself that raised pop music's skill floor high enough that such icy professionalism now feels like the most tiresome part of it — Dua Lipa does this regularly, after all, and with equal anonymity. No, what saves it, and ensures the song remains nothing so much as a delightful diversion (conditions of its resurgence be damned, I say), are the sampled whoops that come in beneath the guitar solo; notwithstanding that such a slice of controlled disco can credit itself with having a guitar solo to begin with, but the canned hype is such a stupendously goofy touch. It humanizes the song instantly, stripping the archness of its artifice aside to reveal the awkward smile underneath. The moment passes, of course. But the smile lingers. [7]

Anna Katrina Lockwood: I've been waiting 20+ years for an opportunity to issue a dissertation on the songwriting genius of Gregg Alexander and by god am I ready. Though it's hard to imagine it in a different form, "Murder on the Dancefloor" was apparently a cast-off single for Alexander's New Radicals debut, replaced by the equally glorious "You Get What You Give" — like, imagine being such a talented songwriter that you can just cast off a song like this, knowing you've got an equally great one to replace it with! "Murder on the Dancefloor" is just perfection in Ellis-Bextor's hands, with a galaxy of terrific choices in its production to go along with the amazing melodic structure. I still can't help but burst out laughing at the initial vocal hit in the intro on occasion, a perfect, delicately harmonized coo of "Murder!," cutting through the disco instrumental setup occurring all around. It's as great a moment of pop songwriting as I'm aware of — setting the expectation of the song's vibe from the outset. Ellis-Bextor's lyrics are outstanding, cleverly arch but not too shiny, in the thick of it yet also gliding past suavely. The song is incredibly detailed, a carefully calibrated piece — it lopes by with a relaxed stride rather than a reckless dash, a well-tailored Savile Row suit as opposed to an H&M tunic, cut to the millimeter. Yet it's also very clearly of the disco, built for singing along, difficult to avoid dancing to when it comes on. It turns on its heel at moments' notice, with layers of melody playing off each other throughout. Matt Rowe's efforts in production also deserve notice — this song sounds great, so distinctive that it is still eminently listenable 23 years on. I honestly have not a single thing to criticize about "Murder on the Dancefloor," and it's been a long time that I've considered it to be one of the truly great pop songs of my lifetime. It feels like incredibly just desserts to see it garnering so much praise now.  [10]

[Read, comment and vote on The Singles Jukebox ]

[asexual-doctor]

Season 9

Day of the Daleks 🌕🌕🌗🌑🌑

I liked the possible future, under Dalek domination, and how coming back in time to change it actually makes the very thing they were trying to prevent happen. The Daleks are back, but I wished they’d had more of a confrontation with the Doctor, it all felt a bit rushed here. Also, I was very upset by the fact that Three refuses to kill one man to save millions (even though it wouldn’t have changed anything) because it’s wRoNg but half an hour before, he shot and killed several Ogrons and this was never addressed. I’m sorry, I love you Three, but just fuck you. All in all, this episode is ok but not really memorable either.

The Curse of Peladon 🌕🌕🌕🌕🌑

Sorry, I lost my fucking mind every time King Peladon’s thighs appeared, who in hell thought that this would make a king look respectable and not look like a fucking slut? Anyway. I liked this episode, especially the political aspect of it all, even though it was a tad predictable. I liked Jo here, she finally felt deeper, I hope this trend will continue from now on. The Ice Warriors are back and they’re nice, why not? But it kind of physically hurt me to hear them talk. And we have the Venusian lullaby, and if I still prefer Paul McGann’s version, this one (the original you might say) is also very very good.

The Sea Devils 🌕🌕🌕🌕🌗

Until the end, I was expecting to see the Brig and UNIT arrive on white horses to rescue the Doctor (and the Master). So I was a bit disappointed when they didn't. But apart from that, I loved this episode and that's not surprising as it has everything I love: a sea mystery, the sea devils, and the Master (Delgado, please). I love the Master even though his schemes are always the same, this idiot NEVER learns and I love his relationship with Three: the sword fight (was this scene completely necessary? No. Would it have been a great loss if it hadn't been included twice? Yes.), the touching and the collaborating at the end ("we can both die or both escape" you morons deserve to die for giving me so many emotions I can't handle too many emotions, I'm emotionally impaired). Anyway. I also really liked Jo here, the way she helps the Doctor to escape and that scene with them communicating through the window ... hum ... Ten and Donna ... hum.

The Mutants 🌕🌕🌕🌑🌑

This episode is weird. The writers, director, and producers were obviously on drugs when this was written/shot. And luckily, it's an old case of it's so bad that it's actually good. It's camp, it's gay (excuse you, you can't tell me it's not: rainbow mutants and gay couple with Stubbsy and Cotton), the mutants are very ugly and yet I can't help but love them, especially their relationship with Sondergaard (who is a hippie). And the plot is actually interesting and well-handled! And I'm falling hard for Three, I think he might be joining Eight and Twelve up the mountain of my adoration.

The Time Monster 🌕🌕🌕🌕🌗

Oh wow this is so gay, it was delightful. I watched this episode in one go (almost) and kept laughing my ass out. I mean, it has everything: Three being rude to the Brig, TOMTIT, the Master being a pacifist, the temporal sensor thingy, the Brig calling Yates "Mike" and checking out his injuries, baby Benton, two TARDISes inside one another, pigeon!Chronos and genderless!Chronos, "groovy", ... I love everything about this episode, I love Three, I love the Brig, I love the Master. The only negative thing was the parts in Atlantis that I found a tiny bit less interesting but really, a very very good episode all the way

[just-my-latest-hyperfixation]

Congrats on the (well-deserved) 1k! Can't miss that opportunity to ask you stuff >w< 🧠 What's a random little headcanon from (You got me) in the palm of your hand that you didn't get to include, a scene you scrapped or a detail you changed? 

✍️ What was your writing process like for Hic sunt dracones?

💀 Would you rather drink tea or coffee?

Thank you so much for the kind words and for the questions! 🥰💖

🧠

Altogether, there was not a lot I scrapped but rather a lot I added. The original outline for this fic was four chapters rather than the six and an epilogue it ended up with, but then the sex scene spiraled out of control (like they tend to do), and then Steve wanted to visit Eddie in his rent before Nancy showed up, and then the platonic soulmates wanted to have a moment in Robin's bedroom and how could I say no to extra Stobin?😅

I'm still very happy with how the fic turned out bc I really like the pacing and I think the extra bits really add to the character dynamics. 🥰

✍️

Oh my God, here we go!

So, everyone is gonna laugh at me now, but when I first thought of that story, I thought it would be SHORT! 🤣

When I started writing, I had everything up to Eddie’s first shift and the fullmoon sex scene planned out, and I thought it would be a relatively quick write that I just needed to get out of my system.

By the time I finished chapter 1, I began to realize that this would … not be the case. 😅 The thing kept getting longer and longer and the backstory and world building kept getting more and more complex, and that poor guy was still stuck in dragon form. 😂

By the time I finally got to the big reveal, I had a solid idea of the ending I wanted (dramatic tower plummet, followed by happy end and throne sex), but the in-between was very, very foggy, and remained like that until I wrote the escape scene almost. (The outline for the entire middle part literally read “they hang out at the lair and fuck a lot” for the longest time. It gave me massive anxiety.) It literally all fell into place when I figured out the role I wanted Wayne to play, and from that moment on, it finally came together. (Except for chapter 13, aka the longest fight scene in existence, which felt like I was bodily wrestling it out of my brain and into the doc.)

The flower crown, btw? Not mentioned in the outline with a single word, I only thought of adding that about one chapter prior. 😅🌸

💀

I'm a coffee gal through and through. There's one brand of tea I'd kill for, though - mango and ginger flavored. I can drink that stuff like water.

I'm celebrating 1k followers - let's chat! 💖

[sakee21]

SEVENTEEN - F*ck My Life MV

Oh my gosh... I really had to make a (long) post about this song and the MV because the MV references the movie called "The Truman Show" which is a touching classic movie, the message and the lyrics of the song really hit so hard, and the whole production of the MV is top-notch and SVT's acting in here deserves to be appreciated, like it was really like a short film or something. It was really amazing in my opinion.

So first, for the Truman Show references that I can remember (cuz it was fun to look for them haha).

(SOME SPOILERS FOR THE MOVIE AHEAD!)

Plot summary for those unfamiliar with it: the movie was about an ordinary man named Truman who has a stable job, a lovely wife and a loyal best friend. However, it seems that something was not right with his almost "perfect" life when he began to notice unusual things happening around him, such as a mysterious object falling from the sky

and rain pouring down on a certain spot only.

It turns out that the movie is set in the future and Truman is the star of a reality tv show that is being broadcast to the whole world.

His whole surroundings is just a giant tv set made with advanced technology, the people around him (including his family, friends, coworkers) are just actors hired to play certain roles, and since his birth he was living a fake life made by the show's creator/director.

However, this didn't mean that Truman's feelings, emotions, and experiences were fake because he once fell in love with an extra actor named Sylvia. But since she wasn't the intended love interest for Truman (and because she was trying to help him get out of his fake life), she was forcefully removed from the show.

The pin during Joshua's scene is a reference to the pin that Sylvia wore in the movie.

Becoming confused by what is real or fake and driven by his desire to find Sylvia (his true love), Truman began to go against the rules and goes missing. He decided to run away using a boat and crosses the ocean (which he is afraid of because of a trauma he had when he was young).

Of course the show's creator didn't want this to happen, so he made a storm happen to discourage Truman and change his mind.

The final part of the movie showed Truman fighting against his fears; him hitting the edge of his world, the "sky" (which is actually just a backdrop wall) and realizing that he was indeed living in a fake world; his desire for freedom; and him ultimately making the choice to open the door to the outside world and go live his own life.

I think the overall message of the movie (and especially the ending) fits really well with the message that SVT's wants to convey in the song, which is to fight for your own life and find your true self, just like Truman. In SVT's own words:

From now on I'll fight for my life

For my own good, fight for my life

We'rе so used to feeling numb in this life

Now I just wanna find myself

Now for some additional thoughts:

Though the overall message of "F*ck My Life" can be applied to almost any person's life, I also can't help but have a bit of comparison to Truman and the world of k-pop idols. We are familiar that k-pop idols broadcast a part of their lives to us, the viewers. And like the audience of Truman's show, fans learn to laugh with them, cry with them, grow with them. They share a lot of things to us and we develop an attachment to our idols. Though this isn't necessarily a bad thing, we have to remember that k-pop idols are still real people living in the real world, and like Truman, they have their own desires and happiness that they want to find and achieve. So as fans, the least we can do is give them the privacy and respect they deserve and let them live the lives they want to live. We don't have the right to tell them what they should do or how they should act or who they should only interact with. If we do so, we are no different from the creator of Truman's show, who wants to cage him inside the fictional world that he created. The idol life is already a f*cked up world as it is, hopefully we shouldn't make it more difficult.

Aaaaaand that's the end of this essay lol (I honestly don't know how to end this well 😅english is not easy). Tho this felt all over the place and the ending got kinda preachy, but idk SVT's song and mv just made me think of these thoughts. I'm glad they released a song and MV like this. I was already SUPER amazed by "Super" but I think I really became more of their fan because of "F*ck My Life". Hopefully the message they want to convey can reach a lot of people, and hopefully SVT themselves can find their true happiness just like Truman.

[casspurrjoybell-22]

The Art of Sin - Chapter 18 - Part 1

•Bain López (Werewolf)

•Noir Laurent (Dark Elf & Sun Elf)

*Warning Adult Content*

My mind felt heavy yet my body was light, as if it wasn't even there.

I saw yet I couldn't at the same time.

Everything was white, a blinding white that would have made me close my eyes but I couldn't seem to move my body.

I couldn't even tell if I had one.

'Am I dead?'

The thought struck me, my mind racing to try and unravel the confusion that was my memories.

Slowly, I started to string together what was my life.

There wasn't any order though.

I couldn't remember the order.

Scenes both disturbing and wonderful played out in my attempt to remember.

I was disgusted by most of them, wanting nothing else then to turn away and bask in this white world.

I couldn't though.

In between the bad, I saw images that made me unbelievably happy.

I was surrounded by people who cared for me, who I cared for.

It was enough to make me keep going.

I began to piece together my existence starting from when I was a child to what I was sure happened recently.

Then the final piece fell into place.

My family held by men.

Their pleas for me to stop.

What did they want me to stop?

Oh. I remember.

Oberous, the vampire the other men followed, was using my body.

It was my plan but I didn't want it.

I hated what I was doing, what my family was forced to see.

It was disgusting.

Even as I took Oberous's life force, I felt shame.

I couldn't help but be happy as I curled up on the floor in agony, choking up blood, as if it were some sort of punishment.

A punishment I still felt I deserved, even in this weird place.

"You wish for punishment?" the voice echoed through the white space, slipping into my ear like a whisper.

I knew who it was immediately.

Oberous.

I didn't panic, knowing exactly what was happening.

"You cannot hurt me in my own mind. Even as we speak, your life force is being broken down and soon you'll be no more."

He chuckled, making me uneasy.

"Ah but you forget, I'll become a part of you. Since we'll be together for a long, long time, how about I tell you about myself?"

I was unable to stop the flood of images from appearing, similar to how I had pieced together my life.

This, however, was much more gruesome.

There was blood, so much of it.

Almost every scene was one of murder, of him ripping into someone for the simple joy of killing.

He didn't need to feed.

He didn't need anything.

I felt nauseated as they continued.

I didn't know how time flowed where I was but it felt like an eternity.

An eternity of blood.

Through it all, he laughed.

He laughed at the disgust that I felt.

He laughed at the expressions of his victims.

It stopped when Lord Nikoli came into view, however.

********

A man, beating him by only an inch in height but by a lot in brawn, stood before a younger Oberous.

The man stared at him and he trembled beneath his gaze, one he loved, one he hated.

Eyes so similar to his own yet completely opposite, held indifference.

"Why?" Oberous whispered, still not looking at the man.

"Why won't you love me, Nikoli?"

Lord Nikoli sighed, running a hand through his hair as the corners of his mouth pulled into a frown.

"It's not that I won't but can't. Love cannot be forced."

"BUT YOU'VE SLEPT WITH COUNTLESS OTHERS."

Lord Nikoli's eyes snapped to the now burning ones of Oberous.

There was no love, there never had been though Oberous had claimed there was.

He did not love Lord Nikoli though try as he might to convince everyone including himself.

He loved the power of having Lord Nikoli, one of the most powerful of their kind, as a lover.

He wanted the respect, the fear, that came with it and for that, Lord Nikoli denied him.

"Fine," there was a dark look in Oberous's eye.

"One day, one day I'll be as powerful as you. I'll find you just to show you that I didn't need you or your love and when I do, Oh you're going to regret it."

With that, he stormed off, leaving Lord Nikoli standing there with suspicion in his eyes, eyes that didn't miss anything.

Not even the slight trembling in Oberous' body or the single tear that made its way down his cheek.

********

Silence.

Neither of us spoke.

"Was that really the reason you came here? Why you did those things? Because Nikoli denied you?"

I felt rage, more than I'd felt in years.

The air around me seemed electrified, sizzling with my fury as what he did, what I did, came back to me.

The pain he caused, the pain my family felt, was because Lord Nikoli wouldn't take him as a lover.

"It's pathetic."

"DON'T YOU DARE TELL ME THAT."

Everything went dark as his voice thundered out with such venom that it stunned me.

The white became an inky black.

My light body suddenly became heavy.

The air was muggy and weighed me down, slowly my thoughts.

It got worse as Oberous spoke.

"He was my everything. I did whatever I could to please him, to make him happy and do you think he cared? No. He ignored my love for him. He destroyed it and turned it into hatred. So I decided to destroy his love."

He chuckled darkly, revealing scene after scene.

In each one, he watched from a distance.

It took me a moment to realize that in every one, Lord Nikoli was the focus, Lord Nikoli and the others.

One scene, in particular, stopped me cold.

[otnesse]

Don't really give a darn about Ashman's lifestyle or not (I may have my own personal disagreements with the recollection of the whole AIDS thing, since if anything especially thanks to Fauci they tended to DOWNPLAY the gay community's connection to the virus and instead made it sound as though it's effectively a Resident Evil-level pathogen, that you could get it even if you drank a glass someone else drunk, even if you were straight, but that's a topic for another day). What I will state however is that I personally think those who thought they shouldn't have the Enchantress curse Adam as a child seem to really misunderstand her. This was the same lady who cursed several servants, including Chip (an explicit child, and one who definitely never deserved the curse no matter HOW you slice it, whether it be Adam ticking her off or even how Adam was raised.) and his siblings (who can't have been that much older than him), and also cursed at least one animal just because of a spurn ONE person did to her, not to mention cursed the entire surrounding forest to be a dreary place with what are likely to be demonic wolves prowling about. There was absolutely NOTHING fair about what she did, so why bother complaining about that bit? It still would have been unfair even if Adam was an adult instead of a child (even moreso considering Don Hahn's commentary indicated that the curse didn't JUST make him physically resemble a beast, it was also psychological to the extent of turning him more feral over time, with the added implication that the rest of the servants would flat out DIE by becoming literal inanimate objects had he failed to break the curse in time).

Personally, they really should have kept that bit in, and ALSO make the Enchantress the actual explicit bad guy instead of Gaston. Let's face it, what she did in the backstory was simply irredeemable and unjustifiable, and it really makes me sick that there's no confrontation against her at all (Gaston by comparison was small fry regarding his crimes). I mean, we could have gotten an almost Final Fantasy-esque climactic battle against her, even make her a direct foil to Belle as a sign of how SHE could have turned out had she not tried to attempt compassion to Adam. In fact, expanding on that, maybe make Belle part-Fae or whatever the Enchantress was supposed to be, have THAT form the crux of her background (including being a victim of persecution by the villagers out of fear of what she is), and even have as some character development her having a conflict on which part of her background she ought to embrace ultimately, in addition to dealing with the Beast.

Seriously, couldn't we have as the climax something akin to either the Bhunivelze confrontation or even the Ultimalius confrontation? With Belle in Lightning/Clive's position and the Enchantress in Bhunivelze/Ultimalius's position, maybe Adam in Hope Estheim's position (in fact, have Adam upon the curse being lifted also appearing as a child, the implication being that the Enchantress de-aged him and took control of his body). You know, like these scenes:

Heck, if anything, aside from it actually allowing for it to keep Belle's Fae background from the Villeneuve rendition, the more Final Fantasy-esque climax I think should have been used instead of the one we actually got would also in a way be a neat nod towards Belle's love of a particular genre type.

EDIT: Actually, even better, have Adam in Clive Rosfield's position, have that be an ongoing battle in a metaphysical plane of existence, while Belle deals with the Enchantress in the physical plane of existence a'la Lightning Farron. That would allow for BOTH parties to come out well in this, and even emphasize the true love bit as well.

Still thinking about Disney's Beauty and the Beast and the age of the Prince when he was transformed.

Out of all the creative team, it was Howard Ashman who really wanted the Prince to have been a child when it happened. He was allegedly very angry when the directors insisted the Prince be portrayed as a young adult instead, because the tragic childhood curse was essential to his vision of the Beast's character.

But one of the main arguments that people always make against the idea of the Prince having been a child is that it's unfair. That it would have been too cruel of the Enchantress to punish a young boy that way; that only if he was a man does it really feel just.

Yet maybe Howard Ashman had a reason for wanting that element of injustice in the spell.

Many writers have discussed the impact of Ashman's gayness and his AIDS diagnosis on Beauty and the Beast. I don't need to spell out the ways that the Beast's curse and resulting status as an outcast parallels the life of a gay man with AIDS in the early '90s. Other writers have eloquently done so already. And is AIDS fair? Is AIDS something that its victims deserve? Even if it is their "own fault" that they contract it, does that make them deserve to die of a slow, painful, debilitating illness, which also makes them even more hated and feared by society than they already were for their sexuality?

Of course the Beast doesn't have AIDS. He's under a spell, which is a punishment for having been cruel and unfeeling. Maybe, for the sake of the story being told, it is better for his punishment to feel fully just and deserved. But it also makes sense that Howard Ashman should have wanted an element of unfairness and tragedy to it.

There's a tension in the Beast's character, which I've written about before: on one level, he's portrayed as an unseemly brute who needs to be tamed and transformed, yet on another level, he's a suffering outcast who needs to be understood and accepted. These two different sides of his character make him complex and compelling, but they don't always sit comfortably together. I think this is an area where the tension between those two sides can especially be felt.

[duskholland]

The Fame Game (Part Nine) - Tom Holland

Summary ↠ Breaking up is hard. But breaking up with your fake boyfriend, with whom you’ve fallen irrevocably and painfully in love with? It’s almost impossible.

Warnings ↠ Angst, Y/N’s being stubborn but can we blame her? Cursing and crying. All the good stuff. 

Word count ↠ 5.2k

A/N ↠ This part? Emotional rollercoaster and a half. We’re almost at the end of the story, though! :((( Only part ten and the epilogue to go, and I am not okay. Crazy crazy crazy. Anyway, buckle in and enjoy part nine :)

NINE: Expiration Date (Y)

It’s raining in London. Tracks of grey, miserable water stream down the dirty window, obscuring the view of the city beyond. Your fingers are cold as you hold a mug of stale tea, the liquid pale and long-past its best. You’d poured it an hour ago, intending to throw it back and pull yourself out of your stupor, but you’d failed.

Today is the end of your relationship with Tom - the expiration date, as your team likes to call it. In a move of obscene pathetic fallacy, the weather curled across London seems to emanate your innermost thoughts. It’s cloudy and grey, darkness settled across the sky. In the distance, the clouds grow blacker, and a part of you wonders if it’ll thunder later.

You feel a tear slip from one of your eyes, and the warm line traces down your cheek as you sniffle. With slow movements, you finally put down the mug, crossing your arms over your chest as you continue to stare out of the window, vacantly. You’re in your London flat, your belongings in boxes around you. With the conclusion of a final filming project comes the end of your lease, and when you leave London tonight on a plane, you leave behind your flat, your job, and your boyfriend.

Your boyfriend.

Your fake boyfriend, who sometimes acts like your real boyfriend, but has made it all too clear that he is only, only, only your fake boyfriend.

A scowl springs out across your face, and your fingers curl into fists at your sides.

You thought you’d been hurt by Tom before. For years, you’ve felt anger towards him - resentment, irritation, burning frustration. You’ve cursed him out on countless occasions, publicly denounced him, and watched on as he’s returned every move you’ve made against him with equal ferocity. At almost every given opportunity, Tom has launched blow after blow at you, but you’d taken it. You had accepted that that was just your relationship - that sometimes two people don’t get along, and sometimes they thrive off irritating the other. His insults didn’t touch you - not really, not like this. They’d riled you up and they’d made you seethe, but they were just insults - just empty, irritating insults, which you’d returned with a smile on your face. But now…

For the first time, Tom Holland has actually broken your heart.

It’s painful when you think about him, as you cast your mind back to your last day together. You’d been so excited, so hopeful, when you’d turned up at his place in LA, and as he’d laid you down and you’d held one another, you’d felt the love you have for him grow. Each time he’d kissed you, you felt your love deepen. Each pass of his hands over your skin made your heart race, your mind shake. You’d been waiting on the right time to open your mouth, say the three golden words, and then propose giving your relationship a real shot, only for Tom to jump the gun and tell you that he, in fact, loved you.

To have Tom stand opposite you and tell you that he loves you - only to immediately follow it up with a retraction - has shattered you. You can’t stop thinking about the moment that you’d let yourself believe, for one brief, shocking second, that Tom reciprocated your love - that Tom had softened out, and grown to love you, too. His words had knocked you off-guard, but fuck, if they weren’t the sweetest three words you’d ever heard. You’d been fully prepared to drop everything and jump into his arms, only for him to add--

“No… Wait, no.”

You are upset. You are so fucking angry. You are a whirlwind of tears and clenched fists and stiff jaws. The more you contemplate it, the hollower you feel. You have never known heartbreak as pronounced as this.

You hate the power that you’ve given Tom. Hate that you’d walked straight into this, eyes open. You can’t even blame it on blind infatuation, because you’d been aware at every moment how dangerous your budding feelings were, just you’d chosen to ignore the warning signals, too distracted by Tom’s easy smile and his kisses. You hate that you let him break your heart, hate that he’s emerged from this unscathed when you feel the weakest you’ve ever been.

But above all, you hate that you don’t hate him. It would be so easy to slip back into old habits, to return to that blind, festering hatred that used to roar through your veins at the mere mention of his name. You can’t return to that, and every time you try to drum up some anger towards Tom, you’re instead reminded of how nice, and funny, and sweet he can be.

You release a shaky breath. It’s your expiration date, today. All that’s left of your relationship is a visit to Tom’s house to collect your things, and a few pap photographs of you leaving his place, in pieces. There’s no doubt in your mind that the paparazzi will find it convincing: you’ve been a mess for days, your tears will be real. You’re full of apprehension and rattled nerves about seeing him again, about walking back into his house knowing it’ll be the last time and having to act like he hasn’t reached into your chest and ripped out your heart.

You are an actor, to your core, but your role within this relationship has been your hardest performance to date - and you have the sinking suspicion that not even you can pull off the denouement.

The paparazzi are already outside Tom’s as you walk down his front path, raindrops bouncing off your jacket. The flashes from their cameras illuminate the garden, and your eyes hurt as the light glints off the collection of small garden gnomes Harrison and Tom keep in front of their house. You’re quick to drum your knuckles on the front door, tugging on the chords of your hood and trying to shy away from the yelling journalists.

After what feels an eternity, the door is opened. Tom stares out at you, eyes widening as he takes in the pouring rain.

“Shit, it’s wet today, isn’t it?” He mutters, quickly moving aside. You hurry into the house, sighing contentedly as the warmth envelops you. You kick off your shoes, but your fingers are frozen solid and you can’t quite tug the zip of your coat. “Do you need help?”

You glance up, seeing Tom eyeing your shivering fingers as you try and fail to release the slippery zip. “Yeah,” you mutter, quickly glancing away. It’s not your intention to stay long, but you’re not so inconsiderate that you’d traipse through Tom’s entire house in a dripping jacket.

You stay very still as Tom steps forward, one of his hands holding the bottom of your jacket as the other goes up to the zip. His tongue slips out between his teeth, and a deep crease appears between his eyebrows as he grasps the zip and carefully tugs it down. A smile splits over his face, and you sigh as the coat releases.

“There you go.” Tom doesn’t stop there, though. He goes so far as to help you wiggle out of the jacket, and even hangs it up on the peg for you. The same peg you’d used when you’d stayed with him a few months ago. Your peg. “So.” Tom rocks back on his feet, looking at you through narrowed eyes. “Why haven’t you been answering my texts?”

You clear your throat, crossing your arms over your chest. “What?”

“Y/N.” Tom steps a little closer, his eyes wide with hurt. “My calls, too. I really needed to talk to you.”

“Sorry,” you fib. You’re not sorry, not even one bit. Every time you’d watched your phone go through to answerphone, you’d felt a little stronger. “I’ve been busy.”

“Doing what?”

“Oh, you know. Stuff.”

Tom frowns at you. “Well, I needed to talk to you.”

“Yeah, you said that.” You clear your throat, shaking out your arms as you try to lighten the air between you. You hadn’t meant to come into your last encounter with Tom with so much hostility on your shoulders, but being so close to him again makes your chest ache. “Sorry,” you mutter. “What did you want to talk about?”

Tom nods his head. “Well, it’s… It’s complicated.” Now he’s hesitant, with reluctance clinging to his features. You feel irritation stir inside as you watch him fluster. All you want to do is get this over and done with, so you can leave his house before you start crying again. You don’t want to drag this out.

“Well, can we talk about it as I pack my things?” You ask, your voice clipping a little at the edges.

“Uh, yeah, I guess.” Tom moves out of the way, letting you into the main body of the house. “What do they want us to do, again?”

You bite your lip as you see the photograph that hangs from the wall in the hallway. It’s new, and it shows you, Harrison and Tom, laying out together on one of their sofas. You remember the night well: Harry had taken the picture, teased Tom for the way he’d got you wrapped up in his arms and refused to let go for the duration of the scary film you were all watching. On your other side is Harrison, glaring at you and Tom, mock outrage on his face. It was a good night - near the end of your trip to London, back when things were better.

“Did they send you a box?” You say, voice vacant. You can’t stop looking at the photo, at the way Tom has his face buried in your neck. You look so happy. “They want me to put all my stuff in a box. Apparently, paps just need to see me leaving with all of my things, and then they’ll get the picture.”

“Pretty simple, then?” Tom drops down to his knees, beginning to rummage in the cupboard under the stairs until he procures a big red box. “This is the one they sent.” He passes it up to you. “Will that be big enough?”

“Yeah. I only have a few things here, I think.”

“Cool. Do you want to start upstairs?”

“Why not.”

You feel awkward as you slowly climb the staircase. The air between you is unsettled, and you can tell Tom’s hurt that you’re clearly less than enthused to be here. Part of you wants to soothe him, but the other part wants to run, run, run.

“Harrison not here?” You ask as you walk past his empty bedroom. You enter their spare room, which you’d been crashing in back when you’d stayed, and quickly start pulling out the odd book and bottle you’d left. Management had instructed you to leave a few things back when you’d left, and now you understand why.

“Nah, Liverpool,” Tom says. “It’s just me.” He sits on the edge of the bed, watching as you quickly pile everything into your box. “Look, Y/N, can we please talk?”

“I’m listening.”

“No, no.” Tom stands up, and you freeze as he reaches out for your arm. The second his warm fingers touch your skin, a lump comes to your throat. “I need to- we need to talk.” You stay completely still, closing your eyes as you feel him slide his hand up your arm. His palm rests on your shoulder, weighted and familiar, and the contact makes your heart pang.

“What do you want to talk about, Tom?” You ask, voice hoarse. You keep your eyes shut. The scent of his cologne is so familiar it brings back the tightness in your chest. You aren’t sure if you’re so upset because this is the last time you’ll be together, or if it has more to do with the fact that you can’t look at Tom without being reminded that he doesn’t love you.

“Come and sit down. I can make tea.”

You suck in a deep breath. “You know that I’m walking out of your house in ten minutes and probably never coming back again, yeah?” You mutter. “What’s so important that it deserves a cup of tea?”

Tom only chuckles, not seeming to mind the bitterness of your voice. “I’ll tell you. Over tea.” He squeezes your shoulder, and you finally open your eyes. Your vision swims with tears, but if he notices it, he doesn’t comment on it. “You can pack your stuff up here, and I’ll meet you in the living room. Okay?”

You nod. “Alright.”

You try to delay your conversation for as long as possible, which takes you on a short trip into Tom’s bedroom. In your defence, you don’t mean to snoop - you did, in fact, leave your favourite book on his desk - but you do also take the opportunity to have a little look around.

On Tom’s windowsill is a line of very dead plants, their leaves shrivelled and broken. You roll your eyes as you peer into the empty watering can, chuckling softly. Typical. On his desk is a pile of scripts, dog-eared and stained with the round marks of spilt tea, and crumpled clothes hang everywhere, shoved over various armrests and laying in heaps on the floor. Tom’s entire room is organised chaos.

What catches your eye, though, is the large shelf hammered into the wall. You’ve been in Tom’s room before, hell, you’d spent your last night in London in his bed, but you’d never taken the time to look up and examine this shelf. Settled in the middle of it, gathering dust, is Tom’s BAFTA. You sigh, and instinctively, you reach up and take it.

It’s heavy in your hands. You’ve felt it before, but you’d forgotten the weight of the blue glass trophy. When you’d last touched it, it’d been on the night of the show, and Tom had thrust it into your hands mockingly, making some flippant comment about it being a mark of his success. You’d immediately tossed it back at him, almost dropping it in the process, and shut him down with a snide remark.

Now, you run your thumbs over the award. The curves are smooth beneath your fingertips. You blink a few times, and two tears splash out onto the thing. As you rub them away, you take a deep, shuddering breath.

Pull yourself together, Y/N.

You swallow, and when you release a deep exhalation, you feel steadier. The award goes back to the shelf, and you pick up your box. Just ten more minutes. One conversation, one cup of tea, and ten more minutes. Then you can leave him behind.

How much can change in ten minutes, anyway?

There’s something melancholic about the way you find yourself sitting on Tom’s sofa, facing him again. You’re in the same position that you were in back when you’d customised your shoes together, before everything had gone to shit: you, leaning up against one armrest, Tom against the other, both of you with your legs outstretched and meeting in the middle. Tessa has staked her claim sitting on your feet, and as you sip nervously at your tea, you keep your eyes on her.

“So.” Tom’s fidgeting. If he’s not drumming his fingers over the ceramic of his mug, he’s picking at the strap of his watch. “I need to talk to you.”

You wince a smile. “Yeah, you keep saying that.” You take a sip of your tea. It’s still hot, and it burns the tip of your tongue, but part of you wants to down the whole thing just so you can leave. Being so close to him makes your chest sting.

Tom takes a deep breath. “I said something really stupid the last time we were together. I was… I was just going to leave it, but then I realised that doing that would be even more stupid,” he starts. Immediately, you feel yourself bristle. You can’t have this conversation again.

“We don’t need to talk about it, Tom,” you mutter. “What’s the point? I’m leaving soon.”

“Which is exactly why we need to talk about it, love.” Tom’s eyes are wide, a hint of desperation swirling in them. He sets his tea down on the coffee table and sits up straighter. “I didn’t mean it.”

You sigh, rubbing at your forehead as you feel another stab of pain in your chest. He’s really twisting the knife, now.

“I know,” you remind him. “You’ve already told me that you didn’t mean it.”

“No, no.” Tom shakes his head, running a hand through his curls. “No.” He’s visibly anxious, but you’re too perplexed to consider offering him any comfort. “I mean… I said I didn’t love you. Well, I said I loved you, and then I took it back.”

You release a sound somewhere between a whimper and a groan, and it brings on a fresh set of tears. “Yes, I remember, Tom.”

“Well, I was wrong.”

Very slowly, you look up at him. You put down the tea and bring your knees to your chest, staring at him through hard eyes.

“What?” You say, voice dull.

“I was wrong. I shouldn’t have taken it back.” “Tom.” You’re exasperated and confused. “What are you trying to say?”

“I love you, Y/N. I’m in love with you.”

Your eyebrows pull together. “What?”

“I love you.” Tom’s lips quirk into a soft, warm smile. “And- And I know you probably don’t feel the same way, and you probably don’t want to hear it, but I had to tell you before you leave. You have to know how I actually feel.” He sits forward, and his foot nudges your knee. “I love you. I’m sorry for being a dick, I just… I panicked, I guess.”

Your brain feels like it’s running slow, wading miles behind the rest of you. You’ve spent so many days coming to terms with the fact that Tom doesn’t love you that the evidence for the contrary isn’t sinking in.

“What- but you said that you didn’t love me?” You puzzle.

“I was wrong.”

You look at him. You look at him long and hard. Your eyes dissect the soft smile on Tom’s lips, the eagerness in his eyes, and the blush on his cheeks.

You don’t believe him.

“How can you get something like that wrong?” You ask him, frazzled. “Tom, I- I don’t know if I can trust anything that you say.”

Tom raises an eyebrow. “So you want it to be true?”

“What? Shut up, this isn’t about me.” You have a lump in your throat. “Tom, this is- this is about you, not knowing how you feel.”

“But I do know how I feel. I love you. I love you, I love you, I love you-”

“Stop.”

You can’t take it. With every repetition, it feels like Tom’s rubbing it in your face.

“Y/N?”

You stand up from the sofa, displacing Tessa who whimpers in response.

“You’re so cruel, Tom.”

Tom scrambles to his feet too, hopping as he regains his balance. He stands in front of you. “What? What do you mean?” His eyes are wide with hurt. “I’m being honest, Y/N. How is it cruel to love you?”

Tears form in your eyes.

“You don’t get to take it back. You… First, you said that you loved me. Do you… Do you know how happy that made me?” You screw your hands into fists, voice hoarse. “I thought, for a second, that you loved me. I really, really did. I thought that we could end this stupid thing and just be happy. But then, you turn around, and you take it back. You’re not allowed to take back a declaration of love, Tom. Do you know how- how crushing that was?”

“-But-”

“No, I’m talking.” The end of your nose tingles, and you reach up to brush the wetness from your cheeks. “You… You broke my heart, Tom. Because I-” You break off, and you meet his eyes. You speak directly to him. You finally bare your soul. “I love you, Tom. I fell in love with you, and so for you to turn around and take it back-” You break off, waving a hand through the air. “It broke my heart.”

“I’m sorry.” His voice is raw, and you watch as Tom rubs at his eyes. “I didn’t know, Y/N.”

“How am I supposed to believe you?” You look at the floor, vision blurry. “How am I supposed to believe that you aren’t going to turn around in two minutes and take it back again?” You rub at your arms. “Why do you get all of the power?”

Tom steps closer, but you just move away. “Y/N, please. I don’t want to hurt you. I would never, ever want to hurt you. I was confused, but I know now more than ever how I feel about you.”

“But you have hurt me, Tom,” you say, finally looking back at him. “Our entire relationship has been us hurting each other. Why should it be any different now?”

Tom clasps his hands together, his cheeks red and ruddy. “We both know it’s different now.”

“Is it?” You release a dim laugh. “Because I feel, just now, exactly as horrible as I used to feel when we’d argue, Tom. All we’ve ever done is hurt.”

“That’s the past.” Tom’s voice is picking up now, growing in strength. When he looks at you, you see his jaw flexing. “I’m sorry for the ways I’ve acted, Y/N, but I can’t change it now. All I can tell you is that you’ll be making a bad decision if you walk out of the door.”

“I have to.” It’s too much to process - too much to think about when Tom’s looking at you so desperately. This morning you’d woken up expecting an awkward visit and then a plane ride far, far away from him. This revelation upends all of that.

“No, you don’t.” Finally, you let Tom take your hands. He runs his thumbs over the back of your palms and you whimper. “Stay. Stay here with me. Fuck PR, fuck the paps. We can be together. We can love each other.” He smiles again, softly. “Let me love you. Please.”

It’s very tempting. As Tom holds your hands tightly and stares into your eyes, you want so desperately to cave. You want to throw yourself into his arms and tell him that you love him, that yes, yes, of course you’ll stay with him. But you think back to all the tears that you’ve shed, and you look at his face, and you’re reminded of the night at the BAFTAs when he’d thrust his polished trophy into your face and bragged about it. You think about all of the times he’s made moves against you and tried to trip you up. You think about your last day together, and how easily he’d retracted his statement.

How can he stand here in front of you, and ask you to forget about all of that so easily?

“I can’t.”

You step away from Tom and instead grab your big red box. You walk quickly into the hallway, your eyes full of hot tears. He follows.

“Yes, you can.”

You sit on the stairs and start lacing up your shoes, staring at Tom angrily.

“I can’t.” Your fingers shake as you tie your laces. “I have a flight. I have a life in LA that I need to get back to. This was never part of the plan, Tom. You’re my fake boyfriend. You aren’t supposed to be my real boyfriend.”

“But you love me.” Tom’s blocking your way, his biceps bulging from his black t-shirt as he stands in front of you desperately. “You told me. You said that you love me, Y/N, and I’m telling you that I love you too.”

“Love isn’t always enough, Tom.” It hurts to look at him, to think about how easily and foolishly he’s handled your heart. “Let me go.”

“Love can be enough.” It’s his final attempt; you can see it in his eyes. “Don’t let us end like this, Y/N. Please.” He takes your hand, bringing your knuckles to his lips. His mouth moves over your skin, dropping kisses to your cold skin.

You feel trapped. You know the car is waiting outside, and it’s all come on too fast, too soon.

“Tom,” you say. You pull your hand from his grasp. “Let me go.”

Tom steps aside. He finally slumps against the wall, pressing his head into his hands. “Is this what you really want?” His voice is raw, broken, and his eyes are red.

You tug your soaking jacket from the peg on the wall as you shrug haplessly. “You can’t drop these feelings on me ten minutes before I’m out the door and expect me to change my life for you.” You look at him. “It isn’t fair.”

“Fine.” Tom stands up straighter. “You should take off your hoodie, then. It’s mine. Wouldn’t be the best impression of the paparazzi to be seen wearing my clothes, would it?”

You drop your jacket to the floor and start shuffling out of the pink hoodie. It’s an oversized fit, and it comes off easily, but you chuckle bitterly. Tom’s taken everything from you - your heart, your sanity - even the very clothes from your back. What more could he possibly want to take?

“There.” You shove it into his hands and angrily pull on your coat. The sleeves are cold and damp against your skin, making you shiver. “Happy now?”

Tom looks down at the jumper. “No,” he says, voice soft. His eyes are round again, widening further as you reach for the front door. “Y/N, please.”

Your fingers linger on the doorknob, cold to touch. You hesitate. When you glance back at Tom, your resolve crumbles. As frustrated and bemused as you are, you love him. You love him, and he’s your best friend, and you’re leaving him.

“Tom,” you whimper. You step away from the door, dodging the box, and fold into his arms, crying with your face on his shoulder. Tom’s arms wrap around your back and he pulls you in tightly. “I’m sorry.” You aren’t sure what you’re apologising for - your departure, your broken heart, your tears staining his shirt. You just know you are so overcome with every emotion that it’s overflowing now, leaving your mouth in ugly sobs.

“Shh.” Tom rolls a hand over your back, patting in large circles. Your jacket crinkles at the action, and you think you can feel his chest shake. “It’s okay.”

You stay in his arms, your face buried in his neck until you stop crying. Even then, you feel clogged up and weakened. He’s so warm - his embrace strong, and comfortable. You feel protected, and when you step back, you feel your heart break again.

“I’m sorry, Tom.” You wipe at your eyes and pick up the red box. Tom’s face falls in response. “I just… I need time. I’m not- I’m not saying that we can never be together, I just… I can’t stay just now. It’s too fresh, I don’t...”

“It’s okay.” Tom steps forward. One of his hands goes to the doorknob, the other rests on your shoulder. He’s near to you - so near that you can see the flecks of pain in his eyes and the freckles on his face. His gaze flickers down to your lips. “I can wait.”

You lean in and kiss him, softly. His lips taste of salty peppermint.

“I… I’ll see you later.” You want to say it, want to tell him so desperately that you love him, but the words choke in the back of your throat.

Tom just smiles, the action not stretching to his eyes. He tilts his head towards the door. “Are you ready?”

You nod. “Yeah.”

Tom looks at the box in your hands and reaches up. He tugs up the hood of your jacket and tucks your hair into it carefully. “Safe flight, darling.”

“Thank you.”

He opens the door and steps aside, and then you’re on your own.

London Heathrow Terminal 5 is very empty. You’re sitting alone in the back corner of the waiting room, hood drawn around your face, sunglasses resting heavily over your nose. You haven’t been able to stop shaking since you left Tom’s house. Feeling numb through bag drop, security, and duty-free, it’s a miracle you’ve made it to your gate on time.

You close your eyes, and you see him. You open your eyes, and you expect to see him. He’s everywhere.

Is this what you really want..?

It plays on loop, lilted in his voice. Is this what you really want? To be sat alone, crying in Heathrow airport, when Tom is waiting back at home, finally willing to take you into his arms?

You sniff as you wipe at your eyes, furiously trying to stem the flow of tears. It had all happened so quickly; it felt almost unfair.

Your phone vibrates in your pocket, and you’re grateful for the distraction.

Tom <3: Have a safe flight. I’m sorry for being such a dick. I know you don’t want to hear it, but I love you. I love you and I’ll wait for you. I’m sorry it’s taken me so long to figure it out. I love you. Xxxxxxxxxx

You put the phone down, sucking in a deep breath. Your eyes fall to your feet. You notice, for the first time, that you’re wearing your special personalised Converse.

With shaking hands, you pull off your sunglasses and stare at your feet. The ink has run a little, obscured by the pouring London rain, but you can still make out some of the shapes Tom had drawn over them, all those weeks ago. A love heart, a flower, a couple holding hands. The lump in your throat grows bigger.

Is this what you really want..?

“Now boarding, Flight BA0269, London Heathrow to LAX. We now invite our platinum club to board.”

You sigh. You stand up and pull your backpack over your shoulders. You look back at your feet.

The love heart is wobbly and uneven, and you remember the look of concentration on Tom’s face as he’d tried his best to doodle over your shoes. The room had been so warm, back then. Just the two of you, together, finding comfort in one another’s company. It’d been simple, and you can remember looking up at him and feeling warmth for him in your heart.

Is this what you really want..?

No.

Your relationship has felt like a series of rash decisions lately, and you aren’t about to make the final, irreversible choice of leaving London. You can’t leave - not now, with the path finally clear. You can’t leave Tom, who’s finally told you how he feels. He’s messy, and complicated, and being around him makes you feel like your heart is on fire, but you love him. You love him, and maybe he’s right - maybe love is enough.

You know that you have come too far to throw it all away without giving him a chance.

You’ve never been a fan of bold, romantic gestures, but as they call your gate again, you turn off your phone and you turn around. You turn around, and you run. You run back to him.

↠ next part

[dailyakira]

rivals to lovers! ft. kazutora, mitsuya, & chifuyu

gn! reader

a/n: THIS IS SUPER OLD.. LIKE IT’S BEEN IN THE DRAFTS FOR FIVE MONTHS. SORRY TO THE FRIEND THAT I SAID I WOULD WRITE THIS FOR

warnings: just really fluffy, competitiveness, different aus?, kazutora's scenario is more love at first sight, writing to mitski is a warning, no trauma??, chifuyu's shower scene is a whole thirst trap

kazutora

the audience applauded as kazutora concluded his complex performance. his guitar laid in his hands, and he fiddled with the acoustic guitar strings as he left the stage.

when he walked down the stairs, he was met with two familiar faces. chifuyu's hair was almost too recognizable in the crowd, after all. baji gave his signature smile and high-fived kazutora.

"great performance, kazutora."

"thanks for coming, guys."

the next person appeared on the stage, with an electric guitar. as you started playing, a rambunctious melody was played. he looked behind him, to see the player.

he was enamored with the playing, even if it was noisier than he had expected. your fingers messily moved around the strings, trying desperately to finish the song.

you were ridiculously beautiful in his eyes. every part of your features was overexaggerated, like you were in some type of shoujo manga. baji tapped on his shoulder and guided him outside of the auditorium.

he took one last glance before he was finally dragged away by chifuyu.

after the show ended, kazutora waited in the lobby awkwardly. they were going to announce the winners soon. he had worked so hard for this, so he could only hope he'd win.

the other contestants were unbothered, including you. kazutora only wished that he could react like that, so he wouldn't be surprised by failure.

the judges walked into the crowded room, and introduced themselves. the winner was about to be announced, and kazutora's hands got shaky.

but his heart stopped when your name was announced. what did he do wrong? he tried his best, but it still wasn't enough. the feeling of despair overcame him.

"and for runner-up, we have kazutora hanemiya. that concludes our awarding ceremony!"

he wished this was all a dream. failure wasn't a growing experience for him at all. he felt worthless, like he didn't even deserve to be at least a runner-up.

kazutora felt like someone was always better than him.

he felt a arm grasp at his wrist. when he glanced upwards, he bumped his head with someone else. it was you, the guitarist from earlier.

kazutora felt green with envy. you had the courage to brag in his face? he'd prove that he was better than you in every single aspect -

"are you okay? you seem upset."

his brain paused for a minute.

"huh?"

he didn't expect his enemy to feign sympathy. he thought you'd be cocky after taking his top spot. the fact made him even more bitter than before.

"i know this must mean a lot to you since you won years in a row. personally, your acoustic guitar sounded way better than my awful playing." you stated with a laugh.

kazutora's eyes widened as he processed. he had gotten many similar compliments, but something was different this time.

the cherry red tones flushed his face, and he tried to use his hands to cover his appearance. your playing was intangible, he couldn't even describe the rush it gave him.

"i heard they're holding an after-party, would you like to go with me?"

◂ ❚ ⊱ꕥ⊰ ❚ ▸

mitsuya

he busied his hands with the needlework. mitsuya heard that he had a new competitor, and he couldn’t help but be anxious.

what if they were better than him? mitsuya worked endlessly to master his craft, but it could all just go to waste.

as he distracted himself with his thoughts, he pricked his finger. mitsuya instinctively put his finger in his mouth.

his glasses slid down his face, and he removed his finger with a sigh. he shouldn’t be worrying about this, he’s a professional after all.

a knock rang throughout his studio.

“come in!” mitsuya yelled.

his secretary entered the room, heels clacking along the wooden floor.

“sir, there’s someone here to see you.”

“let them in, i suppose.”

minutes after his secretary left, a new individual entered the room. mitsuya immediately recognized them though.

“hello, mitsuya.”

he scoffed at his competitor’s audacity. how could they just waltz into his studio like it was nothing?

“shouldn’t you be preparing for your fashion show in a few hours?” you tilted your head with a smirk

“don’t worry about my concerns.” he said sharply.

mitsuya clenched his fist under his desk. he needed to win, losing wasn’t a option when it came to his competitor.

“well, i just wanted to wish you the best, because you’re definitely going to have a damaged ego after this.” you laughed with a saccharine smile.

“i’d like to see you try.” at this point, mitsuya was seething through his teeth.

you decided to take your leave, and left him in a frustrating conflict. he concluded that he should just focus on himself, and ignore them.

in a millisecond, his fashion show was already happening. he nibbled on his pen in pure anxiousness. he saw the models come and go, but he completely blanked out.

until he heard the seat next to him squeak. mitsuya shot his head towards the seat and saw you smiling at him.

"your work is impressive, mitsuya. we should do a collaboration piece."

he scoffed at you and glared at you for a few seconds. he averted his eyes and started to pay attention to everything coming out.

you sighed in disappointment. you had looked up to mitsuya for years, and he absolutely hated you. his patterns were just so intricate, he was an inspiration.

"i'm sorry."

he expressed a confused face as he glanced back at you.

" i didn't want to take your position in the first place. i just desired to compete with you and possibly work together. i never intended for you to hate me."

after a bit of thinking, mitsuya stuck out his right hand towards you. with a cautious look in your eyes, you shook his hand.

"since we got off to a bad start, i'll introduce myself again."

"nice to meet you, my name is mitsuya takashi. i work as a fashion designer. "

a genuine smile appeared on his face as he spoke. he seemed to forgive easily, and you couldn't tear away your attention from his godly appearance.

after you introduced yourself and your occupation, you couldn't help but feel overjoyed. you removed your hand from him, and he repeated the motion.

"so, you were mentioning something about a collaboration?"

◂ ❚ ⊱ꕥ⊰ ❚ ▸

chifuyu

he removed the baking gloves from his worn hands. he was trying his hardest to perfect this dish, but everything was crumbling to pieces. chifuyu had to start over since his cake tasted off.

he took a fresh stick of butter and a few cups of sugar, then put them in the electric mixer. as the mixer was going at a fast pace, he started to add his eggs.

chifuyu lowered the speed of the mixer and added the melted chocolate to his honey-appearing concoction. it slowly added color and became a caramel-colored batter.

as he was getting started on his dry ingredients, his luck ran out. his granulated flour pounced on him, leaving him an absolute mess with no flour to use.

chifuyu shook his head, causing all of the flour to fall out of his ink hair. he sighed and picked up a towel to clean himself up. he decided to go to the store once he took a shower.

the sweltering water hit his skin, and he groaned out of pleasure. the blazing liquid went through his ragged hair. chifuyu ran his fingers through his hair while relaxing his back.

a hot shower was exactly what he needed after his eventful day. as he recalled back to earlier today, chifuyu used his usual shampoo and conditioner, which had the faint scent of roses.

he used his similar scented body wash soon after. chifuyu lathered over his biceps to his muscular chest. the soap dripped down his upper body through the middle of his chest. the soap proceeded to dribble into the discarded water as he shut his eyes in pure exhaustion.

he leaned his back onto the shower door and put the back of his hand on his forehead, whining in pleasure. the steam phased through chifuyu, clouding up the glass shower.

later on, as he exfoliated the dead skin from his legs, he felt at peace. maybe he'd be able to do his full skincare routine, and then possibly go to bed on time.

chifuyu left the bathroom with a cotton towel around his waist, while water droplets from his hair trailed all the way back to his room. he chose to put on a simple white shirt with sweatpants for his outfit.

chifuyu was finally ready, and he could continue his baking soon.

after five minutes of driving, he finally arrived at the supermarket. the bright neon lights of the store name blinded him. he grabbed a cart and set off to find his flour.

chifuyu kept picking up unnecessary things while trying to find the flour. he always tended to get distracted, but he needed a good amount of time to bake.

he walked aimlessly, not paying much attention to what was in front of him. suddenly, he felt something hit his chest before he fell down on the marble floor of the supermarket.

he rubbed his face out of frustration before opening his eyes, ready to yell at the person who threw something at him. his gaze averted upwards as his pupils became wider.

god, anyone but you.

chifuyu hated everything about you, like how good you were at baking, how your hair matched your face, and especially how beautiful your eyes looked.

it was obnoxious to say the least. he felt like he could never measure up to you because he was a hard worker, and you... you were just talented.

“hey chifuyu! did you perfect the cake yet? the competition is tomorrow and we’ll be on the spot!”

the excitement on your face really ticked him off. maybe it was his massive inferiority complex, but he absolutely despised you.

you checked the time on your phone before widening your eyes in shock.

“i’m late for my appointment, but i wanted you to have this.”

you handed him a written recipe. the paper had wrinkled because of its time in your pocket.

it was the cake recipe that he had been trying to attempt, except it was revised. it felt like everything he had been missing.

when he looked up, you had already left. he held the yellow paper up to his chest and felt his heart beat rapidly. a bright red blush splotched onto his face while he had a internal battle with himself.

he still hated you, right?