#all this on top of my car battery being dead and my dad threatening to stop paying for my therapy unless i comply with his demands

[protectcosette]

living with a friend sure is a great way to find out you enjoy their company a lot less than you originally though

[nimmy22]

A Mistake: Chapter 1

summery: Set before the events of spencer's mansion. Slight AU where the Birkin's most recent babysitter gets more than she ever bargained for on one stormy night as she watched over Sherry. Cara was ready for a blackout but she almost got her life snuffed out when two forces attack the Brikin’s home, their goals unclear. All Cara wanted to do was get Sherry to safety but with the phone lines dead, she has to rely on herself. Will Albert Wesker be an ally? Or will he add Cara to the list of things needing a "clean up"?

I hope you enjoy!

Reposted from my account on AO3 under my username doomer.

https://archiveofourown.org/users/doomer

------------------------------

This was not how she thought the night would go. The worst that should have happened tonight was a power outage due to the howling winds and rain threatening to shatter the glass and uproot trees.

Cara was prepared, having dug around the house for a flashlight as soon as she arrived, making sure the windows were closed. Her clothes clung to her like a second skin, suffocatingly tight. She regretted the black skirt and navy-blue sweater she chose to wear for the day as the wind wouldn't stop nipping at her skin. The whole way here, Cara clung onto Claire's body as the redhead dropped her off after school on the back of her motorbike before heading home. Her red leather jacket was envy, but at least now, Cara had found shelter in the spacious home.

Storms like this weren't out of the norm here in Raccoon City. Nowhere in the city was immune to the outages, not even in this affluent neighborhood where the Umbrella's most prominent employees, as well as the mayor, lived.

And so, it wasn't long before the cartoons playing on the bulky T.V screen flickered to darkness. Sherry turned back to Cara, immediately crawling towards her babysitter from where she sat cross-legged on the carpeted floor in front of the TV.

Cara was ready and flickered the flashlight on, but it seemed like the batteries were nearly dead. The beam was weak, and she had to shake it a few times before the light would give a steady glow.

"Cara, I'm scared," Sherry said, sliding next to the high schooler on the couch. Her tiny fingers wrapped around the hand that Cara held the flashlight with as if to help power it up. It did not work—what a surprise. Cuteness is not an energy form.

"Don't worry. I am right here. You live on the nice side of town. It won't be long before we get the power back." Cara said, pinching Sherry's little chubby cheeks. "While we wait, let's go look for some new batteries. These won't last for another hour."

"Ok, I saw some batteries in daddy's office the other day," Sherry said, beaming at her friend. The scent of Cara lingered around the house more often than her own mother. It helped soothe her loneliness for a time, until it faded. She had been beyond happy to finally convince her parents she still needed a babysitter after her old one vanished mysteriously. A babysitter was the only way to have any form of company in the empty house. No friends were allowed over while her parents were out. And they were never home.

"Great! I would rather replace these before we're forced to run around in the dark to find some," Cara said, returning the young girl's smile.

Sherry grabbed Cara's hand and began leading the older girl up the stairs. Two steps up, and her little feet paused their ascend.

"Daddy wasn't happy the last time I snuck in there. He just knew that I went in, but I didn't even touch anything. What should we do, Cara?" The little girl looked down at Cara from where she stood, fiddling with her pendant. It was a present from her mom for her last birthday. The pendant regularly brought the little girl comfort, but she would have easily traded it for more time spent with her parents.

"Don't worry. I'm sure we can find some in other places without getting in trouble with Mr. Birkin." Cara said, leaning towards the little girl with a grin.

While Cara hadn't expected anything from this babysitting job over the weekend, she got something she didn't know she was missing out on. A little sister. Like Cara, Sherry was also an only child, and they found an instant connection with each other. Cara felt a familial love towards the young girl that she herself never received from her mother and father—another thing they had in common.

While Cara was at the Birkin’s home, she found herself pretending that she was watching over her little sister while their parents were working into the late hours of the night. Her real home, real family, were something that she would much rather disengage her mind from for as long as possible. Any excuse to stay away was a good one.

With Sherry in one hand and the flashlight in the other, Cara set out to search the house for batteries. They rummaged through the kitchen drawers only to come up with eating utensils and loose change. Strangely, the kitchen was very much lacking in cooking appliances, but it was clear the Birkins were rarely home, and when they were, cooking was not a priority.

The trashcan was piled high with takeout boxes, and Cara made a mental note to take it out before she left, seeing as no one was going to remove it anytime soon. She could come next Friday and find it still there. The house wasn't exactly dirty. Almost everything was covered in layers of dust. Other than Sherry and her parents, Cara did not know who else sets foot into the spacious home. Many rooms went unused. The home appeared grand on the outside, but the inside did not live up to the expectation she once had the first time she came here. However, this was still a safe haven for her away from home.

Everything was all too quiet, too still—no buzzing of the fridge, no cars passing by, no humming of the electricity. The silence was filled with the sound of their feet, and their exhales. Compared to Cara, Sherry's feet were much quieter against the wooden floors. But her nervous breathing was louder.

While Cara was trying to appear strong and confident for the little girl, she couldn't help but begin to flatter in her steps. She wasn't afraid of the dark, but something did sit right.

Tik Tok. Tik Tok.

As they neared the staircase on their way back to the living room, they passed a clock hung on the wall. It was half-past ten.

"This will have to do," Cara said, reaching for the clock and removing its batteries. "Don't be scared, ok? I'm just going to replace the batteries. Can you hold these for a second?" the little girl nodded, clutching her tiny hands onto Cara's shirt as she accepted the batteries with her other hand. The metal cylinders were icy cold in her hand, but she gripped them harder. With a reassuring smile, Cara removed the batteries from the flashlight, and the room was engulfed in darkness.

"Here, pass them to me," Cara said, feeling for the little girl's hand.

Just as Cara felt the now warm metal cylinder in her hand, a bang startled them both. It wasn't loud, it wasn't enough to shake the walls, but it started them just enough for the batteries to drop to the wooden floor before rolling into the darkness. There was nothing but the sound to indicate which way it went.

Sherry yelped, clinging to Cara even tighter. "What was that?" She whispered, a tremble taking over her lips.

"I don't know," Cara answered, her pulse racing. She drew the girl closer to her body, waiting for another sound—but heard nothing.

"Maybe daddy or mommy came home?" Sherry said, completely unconvinced by her own proposal.

"I don't think so. Your dad said they won't be back tonight." Cara answered, gently nudging the little girl toward the staircase. She inserted the old batteries back into the flashlight before leading Sherry upstairs. The beam was weak, but it got them there.

"You'll be safer in your room," Cara said before reaching to close the bedroom door as the little girl entered. "Wait here, Sherry, I'll be right back, I promise. It's probably just kids with nothing better to do on a Friday night. I know a few idiots right off the top of my head who would think this is funny."

"Wait! Where are you going, Cara?" The little girl said desperately, her eyes growing twice their size as she realized Cara was leaving her.

"I'll be back," Cara said and again attempted to leave. Above them, a skylight window bathed the little girl's room with the pale moonlight.

"But what if you don't come back?" Sherry whispered, swallowing the lump in her throat.

"Why wouldn't I?" Cara said, her eyebrows furrowing. She was trying to convince herself that this was nothing, but Sherry wasn't helping whatsoever.

"Sorry," Sherry responded, crawling her way under the bed.

Cara left, gently shutting the door behind her as she went. She made her way downstairs, doing her best to muffle her breathing and lighten her footfalls. She checked the front door and found it pleasantly locked. "It's probably some idiots," She muttered, feeling the tension lifted from her shoulders. She checked the windows on the first floor and found them similarly untouched. With an eye-roll, she made her way to the staircase, keen on heading back to comfort the little girl and inform her of the lack of danger.

She hadn't taken four steps before she spotted a shape in the darkness that hadn't been there before from the corner of her eye. Her heart jumped a beat better than she could've ever jumped the obstacles in track and field. Her gut screamed at her to flee in the other direction, to hide next to Sherry under the bed. Instead, she Collected her scattered courage and pointed the flashlight at the source of her unease.

Only there was nothing. The silhouette was gone. Before Cara could continue her search, the flashlight died, and she was left with an even stronger gut feeling. "Not now, damn it!" She cursed, aggressively shaking the flashlight.

She sighed in relief for a split second as the weak beam returned, only to feel all the breath being snatched from her lungs. A six-foot-man, heavily armed and dressed in black fatigues, came straight for her, face obscured by a ski mask. A scream bubbled its way out of her throat, only to burst prematurely as the intruder raised a gun to his lips. She forced her lips shut, feeling hot tears build up before they trickled down her cold cheeks.

[purplesurveys]

1269

Last thing you bought online? Did you like it? OMG OMG so I got Angela an Army Bomb!!!!!! for her birthday!!!! It was HELLLL looking for sealed ones that were already onhand, but fortunately I was able to find one from this really nice seller a few days ago and the shipping was quick as well. I’m just a little worried because the outbox has a little dent on it :( but it was the best onhand offer I could find so I got it before anybody could call dibs. I still hope she likes it! I got her batteries too so that she can try lighting it up as soon as she has it. :D

Could you date someone who didn’t drive (and didn’t show an interest in ever getting their license, either)?  I feel like this is such a petty thing to make a big deal about...if they knew how to commute or any other way to get to their destination, I don’t think this should be a problem. It would only be an issue to me if they refused to get a license in a very I-generally-lack-ambition kind of way.

How would you react if your artwork became famous?  I don’t have any to show off to begin with. I love appreciating art, but creating it was never a forte of mine.

Would you get your nipples pierced?  No, I don’t plan on getting any piercings. How many people know your birthday?  Outside of my family, my best friends. I think everyone else relies on Facebook to be reminded, which is fine with me.

Has anyone ever tried to ruin a relationship you were in?  No. Quite the contrary, really...I was sometimes informed about red flags taking place, which of course my stubborn ass ignored.

Have you ever watched a whole hour long infomercial?  Probably, as a kid. The channel from which I used to watch WWE aired these really long infomercials so I would watch those while waiting for like Raw or whatever show was going on after.

What is your current MySpace song?  I never hung out on Myspace. I had an account, but I was too young for it so it wasn’t long before I got bored.

What is your favorite kind of meat to put on your sandwich?  Pulled pork or fried chicken.

Which one of your exes do you feel like you have the most chemistry with?  I only have one ex.

How do you feel about people who make Facebook profiles for their pets? I find it really cute. But I personally wouldn’t put in as much effort lol.

Have you ever personally known a pair of conjoined twins?  Hmmmmmmmm I don’t think so.

What was the most disturbing thing you have ever heard your mother say? She threatened suicide in front of me and my dad in a very calm way when I was around 11, I think? Maybe 12, idk. I haven’t actually thought about that moment in an extremely long time until this question. I’ll move on now and shove the memory at the very very back of my head before I get sad.

Is there something in particular you like to look at photos of? What is it?  Aside from members of BTS (lol), interior design inspirations.

Chewy chocolate-chip cookies: like or dislike?  Ooh, love. When I bite into a cookie it hassssss to ooze chocolate, otherwise I would be underwhelmed.

If your boyfriend/girlfriend wanted to dress only in the opposite sex’s clothing, would you support that? If not, would you leave them?  Support.

Do you think your grandmother is/was beautiful?  They both are.

Which of your fields of interest are you a total expert on?  Anything that has to do with writing (except poems), I guess? I like being able to give people advice and tips when it comes to that.

When was the last time you got all dolled up?  Last July when we had a big PR media launch thingy and I couldn’t afford to look like shit on Zoom.

Do you ever name objects? (i.e. mp3 players, guitars, cars, etc.)  Never.

Do you have a criminal record?  Not criminal but it’s possibleeeee that I have some kind of record on my license from the time I got stopped by an officer in Alabang, lmao. It was a minor offense from a tiny part of the town so I don’t actually know if they filed it, but it’s possible.

Last person you took a nap with?  I don’t really nap with other people. I hate falling asleep in front of others to begin with.

Does seeing your mother cry automatically make you feel sad as well?  No.

Do you think someone likes the same person you like?  I don’t like anybody.

Do you want your life to stay the way it is right now forever?  No, I do not want to stay in a pandemic and not get to maximize my life the way it’s supposed to be enjoyed forever.

Have you ever been to craigslist.com?  I’ve never checked it out; idk if we have that here?

What about eBay?  I also dunno if they operate here so no, I’ve never bothered.

Have you ever used Nair?  Not Nair, but I’ve used Veet before.

Are you medicated?  Nope.

Do you shape/fill in your eyebrows?  I never do stuff to my eyebrows except shave them.

Have you ever stolen/borrowed clothes from an ex?  Several articles of clothing were left behind here, yeah. I never had the chance to give them back because I stupidly thought we were going to get back together eventually. By the time I moved on the timing was already off, so the clothes stayed with me untillll...just a few days ago, actually – when I finally cleaned up my room and got rid of a bunch of knickknacks that accumulated here over the years, including all her shirts and sweaters and stuff.

Could you make a statement about anything political?  The 2022 presidential election landscape looks like complete shit and I’m nearly at that point where I want to stop giving a fuck about this country’s future.

Do you think you’ve already met your soulmate?  No.

Do you get the feeling something good will happen in your life soon?  I think I’m already living in it, haha.

Do you enjoy romantic movies, even when they’re cliche?  Sure, but cliché is also hit and miss for me. I love Titanic and Love Actually, but I cannot stand movies like Me Before You and The Notebook. I guess it depends on certain executions, like the acting, screenplay, casting, etc.

Have you been to McDonald’s in the past month?  No, not inside. We did drive-thru within the last month, though.

Have you ever slept over at your best friend’s house?  Not at Andi’s, but I have at Angela’s.

How often do you go bowling?  Extremely rarely. I can’t tell you the last time I went bowling.

Last time you were in an apartment?  Like 2007 when I visited my aunt back when she still lived in one. None of my friends have their own apartments.

Have you ever seen a live seahorse?  I don’t think so.

Would you like to have your own yacht? I mean I wouldn't say no if you offered it to me for free, but I'm not exactly interested in one. < Same.

Winnie the Pooh or Tigger?  Tigger always made me laugh as a kid.

What’s the unhealthiest thing you’ve eaten today?  Luncheon meat, I think? I didn’t go overboard with the junk food today.

Has a stranger ever offered to buy you a drink?  Hm, not that I can recall.

What is something you’d be happy to receive as a gift, that doesn’t cost a lot?  A bag of the salted egg chips that I really like costs like 30 bucks, or roughly 60 US cents.

What kind of music does your significant other/crush like to listen to?  I don’t have any irl crushes, can I use a celebrity crush instead? HAHA he’s heavily into jazz and whenever he gets asked for music recos he always gives jazz artists from like the 50s and 60s.

Who did you have your first kiss with? Do you remember what colour his/her eyes were?  Gab. Dark brown.

Are there any themes from TV shows that you like to sing along to? The Big Bang Theory and Friends; and then I also liked humming to the themes of Breaking Bad, The Walking Dead, and BoJack Horseman. The Phineas & Ferb theme was also a lot of fun to sing along to.

Do you eat dessert after dinner? No, I never do that. I’m usually already full after dinner, and we don’t always have sweets at home anyway.

Have you ever had too much to drink and felt embarrassed about your behavior the next day?  Sure.

When you go out drinking, what do you prefer to drink?  Cocktails. I very rarely go for hard drinks/shots, especially if I brought my own car.

What was the last animal that you saw?  Dog.

What was the last thing that you said to one of your siblings?  I just told my sister I was done using her laptop so she can have it back. My Memories of 2020 DVD turned out to be region-locked so I have to use her laptop every time I want to watch it :(

What is the most expensive thing that you’ve purchased that you paid for:  My Map of the Soul photobook cost me around 5k in total.

What is your favorite messaging program?  Messenger.

Do you eat fast food more than 5 times a week?  Wow no. Aside from being extremely unhealthy, that’s also a LOT of spending??

Have you ever almost drowned?  Yes.

Have you ever learned something shocking about someone through Facebook?  I mean I’ve had to learn about more than one family death through my Facebook feed, which sucks but is nothing I have control over. Otherwise the most shocking thing I’ve seen is probably classmates from high school having their own kids, but at this point I’m used to it already.

What’s the scariest living animal that you’ve petted?  I’m not really afraid of carrying/petting animals especially if there’s a guide or expert nearby, but the most daring one was probably the crocodile I volunteered to hold in Palawan.

Do you remember the first conversation you ever had with the person you currently have feelings for?  Not at all.

Do you dread certain days of the week? If yes, what day/s and why?  I hate Mondays for obvious reasons lol. I don’t know anyone who is actively cheery about reporting back to work.

If you eat oatmeal, do you have it plain or do you have certain toppings that you like to add to it?  I never eat oatmeal. I had that every single day for breakfast from like kindergarten to 4th grade and I vowed never to take a spoonful of it again.

What is the funniest or strangest thing you’ve ever heard somebody say in their sleep?  I dunno. I used to keep a log of the things my ex used to say in her sleep and a great deal of them were hilarious, but obviously I deleted that note a long time ago.

Choose one - Butterfinger, Milky Way, Snickers:  Butterfinger.

Do you use Mozilla Firefox? Nopes.

Who is your favorite person to hug? Angela and Laurice.

Have you ever had to have a mug shot?  Nope.

What was the last thing you carried to your room?  Kimi.

When was the last time you had a late night phone call?  WELL over a year ago.

[thebibliomancer]

Essential Avengers: Avengers #230: THE LAST FAREWELL!

April, 1983

“Yellowjacket no more!”

Aw, dang! Hank got raptured!

Captain America, Thor, and Hawkeye is a weird collection of characters to be staring forlornly at the empty Yellowjacket uniform.

Thor hasn’t really expressed much about the Yellowjacket situation in comparison. You think they could squeeze Wasp into the shot. Just her ex-husband is all. She’s just the team leader is all.

Put Wasp on the cover, you cowards.

So last times on Avengers: Hank Pym got himself kicked out of the Avengers and out of his marriage and pretty much deserved it. He was tricked into committing treason by his arch-nemesis Egghead and sent to jail. He sat in jail for, like, a really long time. The wheels really spun on the arc.

He was kicked out of the Avengers/walked before he could be kicked out in #213. He was arrested at the end of issue #217. His trial was in issue #228.

He was kidnapped from his trial by the Masters of Evil. Then in #229, he turned the tables on them all in quite a satisfying manner and slugged Egghead in the egg head.

Then Hawkeye manslaughtered him. He’s dead.

Hawkeye arrowed the science gun to stop Egghead from shooting Hank in the back and then the science gun backfired and microwaved that egg.

This makes Hank’s victory a little bittersweet for him.

Hank Pym: “I defeated the Masters of Evil single-handed... but more than anything, I wanted to bring Egghead to justice. He was a thorn in my side for so many years. I was never able to defeat him for long, not when I was Ant-Man... and not even after I became Giant-Man! He bedeviled me in every identity I assumed. He did me the greatest wrong when I was Yellowjacket. I’d already ruined my Avengers career, when he tricked me into committing a federal crime!”

Hawkeye too is set to thinking by what happened. Maybe humming a bit of Bohemian Rhapsody to himself too.

Hawkeye: “This is unreal! I’ve never killed a man before! I never planned on anything like this happening! Yeah, but I can’t feel sorry for Egghead! If anyone deserved this, he did! My brother Barney bought the farm, stopping Egghead from killing the Avengers. And if I hadn’t acted when I did, Hank Pym would be dead! If I had to do it again... I would!”

Hawkeye: ‘Eh, fuck ‘em!’

hah.

But Hank laments that with Egghead dead, so goes his chance of proving his innocence by turning him over to the law.

Hank Pym: “Egghead was always getting away from me, Hawkeye. It’s almost as if he’s pulled the ultimate escape!”

Fun fact: There doesn’t seem to be an Ultimate Egghead! Why would there need to be? Even more than in the 616, Ultimate Hank Pym is by far his own worst enemy.

Hawkeye basically tells Hank to buck up and that there’s basically incriminating evidence lying all over the place.

He doesn’t say it but even Egghead’s dead deceased corpse is kind of like evidence. Evidence that he wasn’t dead until recently.

Captain Marvel shows up because someone finally came looking for Hawkeye.

Hank is surprised, much like others have been that this is Captain Marvel. He knew the old guy, the super saiyan. And I guess he didn’t hear there was a new one.

Hawkeye: “We’ve had a few changes since you went in the slammer, Hank. C.M. is an Avenger in training.”

Huh. Captain Marvel doesn’t even react to the dead body. Then again, there’s a lot of bodies lying all around the place.

And while Hawkeye is introducing the new Captain Marvel to Hank, one of those bodies stirs.

Moonstone has regained consciousness and assesses the situation. She could blast Hank, Captain Marvel, and Hawkeye with her coherent light pew pew but that’d just weaken her.

Like in the previous issue, Moonstone is one of the few supervillains who knows when to fold ‘em.

So she decides to skeedaddle while the getting is good but whoops.

Getting wasn’t good.

The rest of the Avengers have shown up and cornered her while she was pondering.

So Moonstone decides ‘eh fuck it’ and promises to spill all the beans if it gets her a lighter sentence.

So days later, the mostly off-screen trial of Hank Pym finally ends.

A loooot of new evidence suddenly popping up led the prosecution to withdraw all charges.

The lead prosecution witness, Trish Starr, suddenly reversing her testimony after putting on Tony Stark’s magical mental-scan helmet kind of tanked the case, really.

Wait, they really did just admit the use of the helmet in the trial when its new, unsubstantiated technology whose inventor disappeared?

Damn, I knew the Marvel legal system was wild (considering comic books as legal documents as explored in Dan Slott’s run on the character) but still!

Although it makes sense. Egghead got Trish to incriminate Hank by using the bionic arm to alter her memories. The helmet Tony invented undoes that kind of alteration. This connects the dots quite reasonably. Glad Stern was paying attention when preparing to finish this arc.

Moonstone and Beetle confirming that Egghead was using Hank as a tool also helps.

In fact, not only did the prosecution drop all their charges, the judge also dismissed all the charges. Which feels redundant? I dunno much about law, really. Just the She-Hulk version of law. Which, again, uses comic books as legal documents.

Apparently happening at around the same time, Hawkeye also had his day in court.

Literally a day.

It wasn’t a trial, just a hearing to investigate whether he was guilty of wrong-doing in the death of Egghead.

Newsman with a newsplan: “Though he was threatened with contempt-of-court charges a number of times -- Hawkeye was found innocent of any wrong-doing in the death of Dr. Elihas Starr -- the self-styled Egghead.”

Yeah, I bet Hawkeye was threatened with contempt-of-court a bunch. And I bet you anything that at least one of the times he rejoined with “No, you’re out of order! This whole damn courtroom is out of order!”

And then the judge probably just sighed.

I mean, look at that unbelievable Hawkeye in the bottom left panel.

Anyway, I think Stern must have felt a little pent up having to start his Avengers run finishing off someone else’s story, especially having to devote a recap issue to it since the plot had been interspersed with fill-ins.

Because in the middle of concluding this arc, he throws in two plot beats that I have to assume are to set up stuff of his own.

A day after the trial, the Beetle is being escorted to a cell in a Western Pennsylvanian federal maximum security prison when he bumps into another prisoner.

What neither the Beetle or the guard notices is that the bump to “Sam Smithers” has peeled off some skin on his arm and revealed THAT HE IS ACTUALLY MADE OF WOOD!

Suspect possibly a living puppet.

And elsewhere but samewhen, IN SPACE, specifically on Saturn’s moon Titan, Thanos’ brother Eros is basically complaining about being bored.

When Captain Mar-vell died of having a lot of cancer, he asked Eros to look after Mar-vell’s... uh... -google- robot girlfriend?? Elysius.

Eventual mom to Genis and Phyla-Vells.

Soooooo, Eros has done as Mar-vell’s deathbed wish was and spent an agonizing several consecutive months hanging out in Titan’s beautiful inside forests and just having a real hard time caring about one thing for such a long period of time.

I’m not even being unfair to him.

Eros: “This is the first time in ages that I’ve spent so many consecutive months on Titan! I have ever been a wanderer! I’ve sought out adventure across the wide cosmos. Frankly, I have known romance on more worlds than most sentient beings could imagine. That’s part of the problem. Our friendship has been wonderful, but I’m having a hard time adjusting to it. My previous relationships have all been of a fleeting nature.”

‘Look its not you, its me’ except for attempting to dump someone as a friend, instead of romantically.

Not dump, even. He just kind of wants to ditch her and is asking in a roundabout way if she’s emotionally stable enough to ditch.

She goes, yeah sure, go off and have fun. And maybe she’s getting tired of his company too.

Elysius: “Look... you’ve been a great comfort to me these last few months, but now I need to be alone for a while with my thoughts.”

Geez, how clingy has he been this whole time while desperately wanting to be anywhere else?

Anyway, since she’s fine with him fucking off, he does fuck off. Right to the Hall of Science.

Where Eros’ dad is like ‘oh ffs’ when Eros tells him that he needs to use the LIVING COMPUTER Isaac to look up planets with the highest adventure potential.

Mentor of Titan is a man deeply disappointed in both of his sons for very different reasons.

Anyway, would you really be surprised if I told you that Earth was in the Top 3 planets in known space for adventure?

You wouldn’t, right?

Meanwhile, back at the plot, Hank Pym is on a boat with Trish Starr.

She wants to apologize for that time she incriminated him but Hank isn’t going to blame her for being as much a pawn in Egghead’s scheme as he was.

Trish: “Yes, uncle was like that all of his life. I think he really enjoyed using people.”

And she remembers the first time they met in Marvel Feature #5, where Egghead tried to drain her mind to power his machines. Because. Batteries hadn’t been invented? Because he’s just not happy unless he’s screwing over someone else?

Second one sounds likeliest.

She also remembers the time he car bombed her car but siphoned out most of the gas first.

Trish: “He didn’t want to kill me... only maim me. Nice guy, my uncle.”

Yeah. Its stories like that why its only Trish and Hank also Fred Sloan on a boat at Egghead’s funeral. Yeah, by the way, this is basically Egghead’s funeral.

Fred is only here for Trish.

Hank reacts to Fred so I wondered if he’s important in some way or if Hank recognized him but I checked the wiki and his main importance seems to be... this issue? So I don’t know why Hank reacts to the guy.

So Fred is just here for Trish. Trish is here out of duty, since she was Egghead’s only known family. And Hank is also only here out of duty but more archnemesis ‘can’t believe that asshole is dead and I don’t even get to feel good about it’ duty. I assume.

Hank even gets the honor (?) of laying Egghead to rest. By dumping his ashes into New York harbor.

Mostly because it doesn’t seem like Trish wants to?

So Hank quotes some Mark Twain and dumps the ashes.

Hank Pym: “‘Death... the only immortal who treats us all alike, whose pity and whose peace and whose refuge are for all -- the soiled and the pure, the rich and the poor, the loved and the unloved.’ Farewell, Egghead.”

Trish: “It’s awful to say this -- but I can’t find it in myself to be sorry. I think I’m glad he’s dead.”

And that’s Egghead’s legacy. Mourned by no one. And his death is only not cheered because the only people that cared feel shitty about feeling glad he’s dead.

ANYWAY, there’s some other loose ends to tie up.

So Hank takes a taxi to the Avengers Mansion and I guess finally explicitly explains why the mansion has seemed to change positions over time?

Hank Pym: “I never thought I’d be coming here again. The place has certainly changed since the day Jan and I met here with Iron Man, Thor, and the Hulk to draft the Avengers charter and by-laws. And I still recall the time Iron Man and Thor moved the mansion back from the street to give us more privacy. What a project that was!”

Sounds like a heck of a noodle incident, Hank.

... Why just Thor and Iron Man? Did they... did they literally just shove the mansion back from the street? ... There’s... basements and caves under there. How does that work? That seems like a massive architectural project.

Hank, pls, I need to know more details. You can’t just drop that information and casually stroll away. HANK!

Captain Marvel meets Hank at the door and escorts him inside, captain marveling at how calm Hank is despite everything he’s been through.

Hank shows up to the Avengers meeting and-

Oh god, She-Hulk looks like she wants to punch the suppressed emotions right out of Jan. She-Hulk, pls.

So, Wasp is super formal, calling Hank Dr. Pym and telling him that they want to use the mento-scan helmet to see if he was under outside influence when he did all the very bad things he did.

All of the Avengers are harboring their own concerns.

She-Hulk: “I’ve read legal briefs that were more informal! She’s cool on the surface, but inside -- ! Jannie, why are you doing this to yourself?!”

Are you guys already at the cute nickname stage of your friendship or is that just the way She-Hulk be?

Cap is worried that this is rough on Jan but that she’s doing what she needs to do as the Avengers chairwoman. But he’s more worried about the absence of Iron Man who is still missing and who ignored three calls to assemble.

Thor is just internally like ‘just do the helmet, my dude.’

Hawkeye is literally biting his lip at the tension.

Hawkeye: “Jan divorced Hank after his last breakdown. If we find out that he wasn’t to blame, what’s it gonna do to the both of ‘em? I hate this! That stupid court hearing was a breeze in comparison.”

Huh, Hawkeye has a point. Even if outside influence is proven, its not as straightforward as Jan and Hank instantly getting back together, no harm no foul. There was harm. And the problems with their relationship were deeper than one incident. But it would also create this possible expectation that they should get back together because the specific incident wasn’t Hank’s fault.

And Captain Marvel is still looking at this from an outsiders’ perspective.

Captain Marvel: “They’re really hurting over this... all of them! They all care so very, very much. If I ever become a fully active Avenger, I pray that I can live up to their example.”

So Hank very calmly agrees to use the helmet. But...

Hank Pym: “Sorry... no outside influences. It would have changed a lot of things if there had been, wouldn’t it? But no, I made my own mistakes... and I have to live with them.”

Thiiiiis was the best decision for the story arc. It may seem, in retrospect, the worst decision in the long run, but I can respect the story for standing by what it has done and standing by the growth Hank has had as a result of everything that happened.

I think a lot of more modern marvel comics have gone a little wild with letting the heroes do all kinds of dubious things and also die because it can be easily undone. It was a Skrull, they were being mind-controlled, it was an AU Nazi version of them created by a cosmic cube child. Or by giving the hero some big redemptive moment like Iron Man wiping his mind to make up for doing Civil War. Or Iron Man dying to make up for Civil War 2. You can explore whatever scenarios you want without worrying about dealing with the consequences long-term.

But in this era of Marvel, they were concerned with the long-term. Not to say that there weren’t cop-outs back in this day too. But since books were expected to keep going indefinitely instead of being cancelled and relaunched, there’s less of a sense of ‘this thing is only here to play with for a little while.’ If you wrote a thing, another writer was expected to follow up on it.

And I miss that a little.

So not giving a cop-out bullshit thing that undoes Hank’s actions was bad in the long run for his image as a character. But that’s a long way from now problem, exacerbated by writers like Chuck Austin and Mark Millar who wanted to wallow in it.

For an arc where Hank fell from grace and proved himself again, taking ownership of what a garbage fire his life can be was necessary.

One among many reasons I probably won’t like the Crossing when I get to it, haha.

With Hank’s actions proven as being Hank’s actions, Hank says there’s one more loose end that he wants to help tie off.

He wants to participate as witness when the Avengers hold a court of inquiry for Hawkeye killing Egghead.

This comes as an absolute surprise to Hawkeye, who I guess never read the bylaws. Which honestly, is very in-character for him.

But it being brought up, he insists that all he has to do is enter the findings of the state judge and be done with it.

Hank insists he participate though.

Hank Pym: “Hawkeye is faced with charges because he acted in my defense. It’s only right that I act in his.”

So, the Avengers go to the first floor library, which is apparently the court of inquiry room. I feel like we’re suddenly getting a lot of details about the layout of the Avengers Mansion in recent issues.

So Wasp convenes the court all formal style, so formal style that Hawkeye thinks that stickler Cap(tain America) couldn’t have done a better job. The purpose of the court of inquiry is to determine the validity of the charge of “unreasonable use of deadly force” and determine what if any proper disciplinary action should be taken.

I think Hawkeye is annoyed at having to go through with this (read the bylaws, my dude) because when Wasp asks if he has anything to add to his claim of innocence of the charge, he says he already gave the court copies of the court transcript that cleared him of the same charge, but also decides to speechify a little, because he wasn’t accused of contempt of court enough today.

Hawkeye: “I have already given the chair copies of the transcript of a hearing of the state courts... a hearing which found me not guilty of the same charge. And I have something else to say as well!”

“I don’t deny that my actions caused the death of Egghead. But in no way did I use undue force! I found Hank Pym in mortal danger, and I used the necessary means to save him... period. After all, we are supposed to be the Avengers, right?”

Luckily for Hawkeye, the Avengers are more willing to put up with him than a state court so Jan just goes ‘ok, noted.’

Captain Marvel also has a minor change of heart on Hawkeye. I don’t think we’ve gotten her in-depth feelings on him before (although he did get pissy about her joining the team, we didn’t see her response to that) but she’s impressed because she thought he had more wind than conviction but is seeing that isn’t so. And she’s also impressed by Serious Mode Jan who she thought was kind of flighty.

Captain Monica Marvel seeing all kinds of new sides of the Avengers lately.

Also, this isn’t important and you won’t be able to see what I mean unless I included more caps than I wanted to, but in the panel establishing the court of inquiry, Monica is just standing off to the side. But in the next panel she appears in, she’s moved over to sit on a couch instead.

I think its a framing thing but its still kind of funny to imagine her going ‘wait why am I standing up’ and heading for the comfy couch.

With Hawkeye’s statement given, Wasp invites Hank Pym to speak his piece.

And Hank gets up and gives an entirely unnecessary but probably appreciated defense of Hawkeye.

Hank Pym: “Ladies and gentlemen... I have not always been on the friendliest of terms with Hawkeye. Point of fact, we nearly came to blows a number of times... back in the days when I was an Avenger. But in all the time I’ve known him, Hawkeye has never used undue force.”

“I realize that this inquiry is little more than a formality. I have no doubt that you will find in his behalf. He did, as he said, act only in my defense. Unlike my own recent case before you, there is not the slightest hint of misconduct or negligence. The only thing Hawkeye is guilty of is being a good Avenger.”

“When I last spoke before this body, at my court-martial, I was not in a rational state of mind. I was unfit to be an Avenger. You wisely expelled me. I never expected to speak before you again. And now, I can think of no finer final statement than this... It has been my sincere honor to have known Hawkeye’s fellowship... as it has to have known yours.”

Okay. So. Half a defense of Hawkeye. And half... just a general good-bye and a demonstration that he actually does know how to deliver a defense at a court-martial. Cool.

I imagine if he had a mic, he would have dropped it.

Probably not, actually. Hank isn’t that exact blend of cool and inconsiderate for a mic drop.

Jarvis intercepts Hank on his way out and asks that he come with him to the second floor study. Jarvis has taken the liberty of gathering up the personal items Hank just kind of left in the mansion and packing them for him.

One suitcase has a bunch of Hank’s clothes that he had stashed in the mansion over the years. Including some wacky ties for wacky tie Fridays and a shirt that Hank had just plumb lost.

The other suitcase is a spare Yellowjacket outfit. In case Hank ever needs it.

Then Hank and Jarvis shake hands, Hank thanking Jarvis for everything that he’s done for him and the Avengers. He asks Jarvis to take care of himself because he knows he doesn’t have to ask him to take care of the Avengers.

This is a very touching scene. Its so touching that Jarvis excuses himself to go get misty eyed.

This is a Jarvis appreciation blog because I appreciate Jarvis as well.

Then, as Hank heads back down the staircase, he is intercepted by Thor, Captain America, and Hawkeye.

Yeah, the court of inquiry resolved off-screen because of how forgone a conclusion it was.

The three Avengers basically fall all over themselves to pat Hank on the back. Hank actually looks somewhat panicked by the positive affirmation.

That’s some mixture of funny and sad that I can’t identify.

Hawkeye tells Hank how much he appreciated his unnecessary defense. Thor clasps Hank’s shoulder and tells him he’s a class act, but in Thor-y words. And Cap extends an offer for whatever the Avengers can do to help Hank get back on his feet.

Hank thanks him for the offer but he’s already received an offer from a small research foundation in the Midwest.

Seems like getting exonerated of a treason charge is the best resume of all. That and Hank’s actual impressive resume.

But Cap has some stuff to work out re: Hank because he starts off on the stuff he put on the back burner back in that Ghost Rider issue.

Cap(tain America): “Hank... I know Iron Man would agree, if he were here, that we’re all sorry about the way things worked out. We should have realized the pressures you’d been under, prior to your breakdown. I was group leader at the time! I should have -- !”

Hank Pym: “Hold it right there, Cap! What I did, I did to myself! If I could have admitted that my problems existed... If I’d been willing to open up to you folks... Well, ‘if’ can be a big word sometimes. The fact of the matter is, I screwed up. And you did the only thing you could do! I don’t blame any of you.”

Hank has boarded the personal responsibility train and goddammit he’s riding it to the end of the line!

Good for him. Good clarity for the arc to have in its last issue.

But having started to slightly shout at the Avengers that he’s taking responsibility dammit! (he looks a bit pissed when he’s responding to Cap) Hank awkwardly excuses himself.

Cap tries to stop Hank from leaving because he has reached the bargaining stage of grief, I guess.

Cap: “Hank, wait! It doesn’t have to end like this! We could make a special amendment to the by-laws! We could reinstate you as an Avenger! You could be a special reservist -- !”

Hank: “Thanks, Cap. But no thanks. Trying to play super hero was the biggest mistake I ever made with my life! I was only fooling myself in ever thinking otherwise. But if you ever really think you might need a Yellowjacket again some day...”

He hands Cap the Yellowjacket suitcase.

Hank: “... Here! All you need is a good man and what’s in this case!”

I would hope, anyway. It’s going to be awkward if he opens it up later and its full of wacky ties.

The funny thing, although not really funny ha ha, is that Yellowjacket is the one codename of Hank’s that never really catches on outside of him.

You have multiple Ant-Men, a couple Goliaths, at least one other Giant-Man. There was a second Yellowjacket, eventually. But she didn’t make a big splash.

Despite Hank’s attempt here to pass the torch, Yellowjacket is a codename that remains inextricably tied to him. Which might be the problem. If there were another, more successful or at least more endearing Yellowjacket, Hank’s infamy in the role would not stand out so much.

Alas.

She-Hulk and Captain Marvel try next to intercept Hank. They don’t know him very well but they wanted to say their goodbyes too, despite not really knowing him that well.

Its the thought that definitely counts, probably.

But Hawkeye has some social awareness for a change and draws their attention to Wasp who is hanging back, but who clearly wants to talk to Hank.

So the rest of the Avengers quickly vacate to let Hank and Jan finally have closure. Or re-closure. “I want a divorce and to never see you again” is a kind of closure.

The situation has changed, however.

They both try to apologize to each other and then laugh at the awkwardness.

Hank: “Janet van Dyne, you are one in a million! After all that I put you through, you want to tell me that you’re sorry?”

Wasp: “I think we both made some mistakes along the way, but there were some good times... weren’t there?”

Hank: “Yes. But you can’t base a marriage on just a few good times. I fell for the young lady who reminded me of my first wife... and you thought you’d found the strong, silent hero. But I was never that strong, Jan. You know that now.”

Wasp: “Uh-huh.”

Damn, his prison time really did bring Hank a lot of clarity. That or the pile of therapists Tony kept throwing at him.

Hank also kind of talks over Jan here. Or at least steers the conversation. I don’t know what Jan would have said because Hank tells her that they both have other lives to lead and tells her to take care of herself.

Maybe its for the best, if, like Cap, she was going to try to shoulder all the blame for Hank’s bad decisions.

Hank walks out the door and finds Trish and Fred from the boat waiting to give him a ride to the airport. And then he is gone.

Like in the final image of the COURT-MARTIAL issue, Jan watches at the window.

“The last time Henry Pym left these walls, Janet felt like crying... but couldn’t find any tears. Today, at last, she has found the tears... for her former husband... for her team... for herself. Today, there is pain and remorse and release. There will be time enough for joy and hope tomorrow.”

Emotional catharsis can be like that.

In that the book kept going ‘Jan is really holding her emotions in and that’s probably not overall great for her’ its good that she can let it out now.

Kind of laughing at Captain Marvel and She-Hulk who only recently just met Jan being the ones going there there while the men she has known for years are just awkwardly standing in the background.

And that’s the fall and rise of Hank Pym. Apparently collected in trade as The Trial of Yellowjacket, which is a decent enough name too.

Overall, a good arc. That is kind of hampered by the need for filler and a writer change near the end. But honestly, Stern catches the ball and runs with it. He concludes the arc just as good as Shooter would’ve.

This arc is all kinds of iconic for Hank, although, unfortunately, most people are only aware of the beginning and maybe have a hazy understanding of what the ending does.

Although. This is a really good send-off for Hank. A really, really good send-off that would have worked best if he did like he said and quit superheroing forever.

That’s not to be, obviously, not in a perpetual narrative machine like Marvel. But it feels like it could have been and maybe should have been the last word on his character.

I enjoy Hank in Busiek’s Avengers and in Avengers Academy. And also, conceptually, Hank telling Reed “it’s on, bitch.” I very don’t enjoy Ultimate Hank Pym. So its a balancing act. The perfect exit for the character vs but I like some stuff when they brought him back.

Anyway.

After this, Stern gets to move on to his own material. Which he already planted the seeds for in this issue.

That’s a pun.

Follow @essential-avengers​ because of my bad puns. Also like and reblog, if you like to reblog.

[hobiheavenly]

Karma’s Cravings pt. 3 (MYG)

✧ Min Yoongi x Reader

✧ Multichapter, Coffee Shop AU, E2L

✧ Warnings: multiple orgasms, cunnilingus (female receiving), penetration, slight dirty talk, slight angst

✧ Word Count: 4.3K

✧ Summary: Your life is going idyllically with your business with the exception of having to work with Min Yoongi who disapproves of your comercial tactics. but when one day a medium tells you he is to be the love of your life you are quick to shut her down but running away from fate can come with cause consequences.

✧ A/N: I DELIVER ONTO THEE THE SMUT! I’m sorry about the ending tho because I promise I want to prolong this a little more. Which means Yoongi and OC will be idiots for now... pls don’t hate me ;n;)

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4

You could see it in his eyes. It was only a matter of time for it. Yoongi had a dark look in his eyes and he seemed to have them dead set on you. The passion and the desire threatening to devour you in the process.

“Take our clothes off?” Yoongi asked “But ___, we haven't even kissed”

Yoongi gave you a seductive smile that shook you to the core. His eyes made you weak and all you could do is just sit there, mouth agape. He was getting closer and closer to you leaving you with nowhere to run. Moreover, you didn’t want to run. You couldn't move, body not responding to what your brain was ordering.

“We can take this slow if you want ____” his whisper made his voice drop lower, causing you to tremble.

The way your name comes out from his lips is sinful. Deep, sexy, and hypnotic. You tried to wake up from what can only be described as an attack to your emotions and your sex deprived pussy.

“What I tried to say was…..” But you didn't even finish your sentence. Yoongi abruptly kissed your lips, his lips plush lips moving on top of yours slowly and seductively. He embraced you, holding you close to him and instinctively you put your hands on his hard chest. Letting yourself go with the sensations that were forming in your mind, you let his masterful tongue explore your mouth and let go of all the emotions you had tried unsuccessfully to suppress. When he broke the kiss you both had to breathe heavily to recover the air missing air from your lungs.

“Ok, what was that?” You asked completely confused.

“Other than something amazing, I have no clue” Yoongi smiled as he saw directly into your eyes once again. He didn't know why he did it but he had felt better. All that pressure was going to kill him and when he kissed you he felt free, but there was a part of him that wanted more.

“Do you usually kiss every woman like that?” You smirked.

“No, only those who invite me to take our clothes off.”

“What I meant to say was that we should put on some dry clothes and take these off. But if you want to catch a cold, by all means.”

Yoongi smirked and separated from you as you tried to get off the counter. "She seems to enjoy torturing me" Yoongi thought a bit irritated. He tried to recover from what just happened and he looked as you walked to the phone. Your hips seemed to sway with a seductive rhythm while walking and the wet pants were still stuck to your skin making your butt look plump and round.

“As I was saying, it’s best we get naked so we can change out of these damp clothes and put on something dry before we get sick” You suggested.

“Yes, but unfortunately I don't carry around a spare change of clothes and I'm thinking you don't have men's clothes either”

“I don't have spare clothes, but my mannequins do so we can just use that.”

“Hell no! I prefer the suggestion of getting naked” Yoongi smiled trying to grab your hips and he hugged you “and while we are at it we can do other things”.

“Of course” you tried to turn around to see him. There was something enjoyable about the way he nestled his arms around you and the feeling of being in his arms. He kissed your neck sweetly as if he tried to convince you of the idea, and truth be told the idea didn’t seem so bad. Damn your conscience for waking up in the worst moment…

“NOT! What we should do is call the Car Association so they can help us with our cars and get some dry clothes and get a cookie while I'm at it. Now if you don't want to put on some dry clothes, feel free to stay in our wet clothes and get a cold. But you are not getting naked while I'm around.”

You pushed him away and went to the window where the male and female mannequins were and took off the clothes. It was more like lingerie but they were still useful pajamas. Hers was a red negligee that seemed to be a little small for you, and his was a black pajama bottom shorts (bordering on boxers) with a matching robe that had little red hearts printed all over.

“Hell no I am not going to put that on!” Yoongi said.

“Suit yourself” You shrugged “Get a cold for all I care.”

“Has anyone ever told you how obnoxious you are?”

“And has anyone ever told you that you whine too much? God! Now I'm remembering all the reasons why I don't like you!”

Yoongi kept looking at the pajama that you threw at him as you had went out back to grab a phone and call for help. He had gotten a little frustrated after seeing how much he had suffered inside just so you could blow him away. But even when you tried to ignore it, he could see you had been shocked and moved by his kiss. You had let loose just like he did and had enjoyed it. So then, why were you pulling away from him?

His mind came back for a second, eyes still looking at the ridiculous and tight pajama with little red hearts. There was no way on earth he was going put on that pajama! No way in hell…..

Yoongi couldn't believe he was actually wearing that stupid pajama. If Hoseok saw him he would be dying of laughter, especially considering that it’s his fault Yoongi was going through all this in the first place. If he hadn't told him that you were a good choice for him and that he needed a woman he wouldn't be having these thoughts about you.

No, there is someone else. Madame Karma! Somehow she did something. He might not be a believer of bad luck and curses, but maybe she was the one who stole his gasoline and made your car die out. And maybe she made the battery of both cell phones die out.

Yes it seemed easy to blame someone. But something in his mind made him think that this was all his fault, for not knowing how to control his needs. Yoongi didn't want you to see the lack of female entertainment he had. Though it seemed fun to see if you were up to the type of entertainment he desired to have.

You came back with a tray with two cups of coffee and a plate of cookies. There was a small cup with milk and a cup with sugar. As you put it on a coffee table in front of the sofa, you could feel Yoongi gaze still fixed on you. The red negligee you wore made you show your long silky legs. Unfortunately the size was tad bit small for your curves, almost showing your butt as you placed the tray on the table.

“Nice pajama” You smiled “glad to see you didn't want to get a cold.”

“Yes well you don't look so bad yourself” Yoongi looked at you up and down as he sat down on the sofa. He was sure the image of you in that negligee was gonna burn in his mind forever and be the star of many of his fantasies.

“Yes well I'm a size bigger than this but it's a good thing the fabric stretches” you said while trying to pull down the dress so it could cover some part of your legs, in vain “I called the Car Association and they told me that they would be here in a couple of hours. How would you like your coffee?”

“I want some decaf, I don't want to lose the sleep at night.”

“Don't worry I used decaf. I don't want to lose sleep either. Sugar?”

“One of sugar and very little milk” Yoongi grabbed his cup once it was prepared as you offered a cookie which he accepted. He remembered the way you had told him about the cookie, "BITE ME" you had said. And thinking about it now, it didn't seem like such a bad idea.

“Why don't you tell me about yourself?” You suggested, clearly needing a distraction from imagining him naked and in your arms. Yoongi looked at you puzzled, “You said I don't know you much so why don't you tell me about yourself.”

“Well there isn't much to say. I live alone and I mostly stick to my work. I don't have any family around so it’s just myself. Hoseok and I used to live together but he moved to another apartment close to his other job. I just don't have time for socializing. But Hoseok insists I get a woman or something like that.”

“I see” You sipped of your coffee “You seem to have the same thing as I do. Seokjin and his boyfriend insist so much about how I should get a boyfriend and well right now I just love my job so much I don't think I need to get a man. It's not like I haven't gone out on dates, but they always end up being too self-centered or too stupid or too nerdy. I have to say that if i were to choose between being with those guys or being alone, I prefer to be alone.”

“We finally agree on something” Yoongi chuckled “do you live on your own too?”

“Yeah, well after I told my father that I was going to start a coffee shop business he didn't seem to be very happy with it. So I started to get my independence and I moved out of my parents' house. Like you I was living with my friend Namjoon but after I introduced him to Seokjin. The two of them fell deeply in love and just made me feel like a bad third wheel. Don’t get me wrong I love them wholeheartedly and they’re my best friends, but there’s so much I can take of them having sex in the next room without loosing it. So now I live alone in a cute little studio. And what about you? Why do you live all alone?”

“My parents live in Daegu and they are sweet and simple people. My father particularly is a practical man, he owns small businesses and always told me strive for the same practicality he had developed so i wouldn’t struggle. At one point in my life I wanted to pursue music but when my dad found out he got rather pissed” Yoongi sighed, remembering the anger in his father's eyes, the disappointment him his mother's face.

“They kept saying it was only gonna lead me to a poor life. In the end, since my older brother decided on a different career path that was still acceptable to parents eyes, I followed in my father's steps. My mother seemed so proud of me when she saw me graduate from a career I had no interest in. But I never wanted to destroy that gleam in her eyes so I just kept doing this. I miss them from time to time but I manage to visit every so often.”

You looked at the man who you thought you knew all this time as an asshole and an idiot only to find a tender and loving man sitting in front of you. So there was more to this informal clone than meets the eye. To say that you were surprised at his confession was an understatement.

“I am so sorry” You said compassionately “I had no idea. No wonder you seem so tough.”

“Looks like you’re looking for more compliments” Yoongi smiled “Well ___, you are a very strong woman. And I have to say that you look spectacular in that dress.”

“You are only saying that so you can get another cookie” you laughed nervously trying to shake it off as one of his jokes, not wanting to show how much the compliment had really affected you.

“True but I still think so” Yoongi said giving you a sexy smile that caused your face to turn red as a tomato.

You turned around and tried to get the image of Yoongi naked, kissing you and making you scream in pleasure out of your mind. It didn't matter what that damn medium said, Yoongi is not your soul mate and you are NOT attracted to him.

"LIAR" a voice in your mind said as you scolded yourself, "Stop thinking of him like that, stop thinking of him in any way possible!"

You got back the cookie that was shaped like pair of lips and you extended it to him. “Here you go. Bite me!”

Yoongi grabbed your hand and he got up very close to you. “I think you should change the name of the cookie” Yoongi whispered in her ear, his deep tone creating a ticklish chill to spread all over your body.

“And what do you have in mind?”

“Kiss me” you could imagine his devilish smile as he uttered the words in your ear.

“Ok” was all you could say. That man took the words away from her without even thinking.

“Suddenly you agree with everything”

“That's what happens when a sexy guy talks sweetly into my ears” you blush deepened “ok then, kiss me!”

“And indeed I shall” he growled in response.

Yoongi got close to your lips and trapped them with his. He grabbed you again around him so you wouldn't escape this time. You felt the room spin and lose control of everything once more. It was addicting to feel him, the taste of the bitter coffee still lingering in his mouth. You grabbed onto to his neck as your legs wobbled, you weren’t going to last long. He started to taste the skin of your neck to your cleavage. There wasn’t any need to touch your breast with his hand, just the feeling of his lips on your skin was enough to have your nipples become hard.

“Yoongi, I am not going to last much like this” You said very softly.

“You’re right” Yoongi kept kissing you but he saw around the room “wanna see if your counter can support both our weight?”

Words had escaped your mind so you only nodded and he carried you once again to the counter. As you sat there, legs open feeling his increasing hard on press against your opening causing a moan escape your mouth. He began to kiss your lips passionately once again, both of you devouring each other with yearning as if every moment, every kiss would be the last. You wrapped your legs around his waist closing whatever distance there was left, as he was pulling the straps of your dress down.

Yoongi kissed your skin as you grabbed onto his shoulders and leaning your head back so he would have a better access of your body. Once your breasts were free, negligee covering only your hips down, he kissed each mound delicately causing your nipples to harden with the cool air and the sensation of his hands and lips on you.

Yoongi enjoyed the sensitivity you had to his touch, pleasured in the thought that the moans you were so deliciously exclaiming from your lips were caused by him alone bringing a sense of pride in him.

“Your skin is just as I imagined it” Yoongi said softly against you “it tastes of sugar and flowers. Delicious!”

“Oh, so you have been imagining this” you smiled seductively.

“Oh yes, and you don't know how much I have been wanting to taste you here” he touched your arms, “and here” he kissed your breasts “and very much here!”

Yoongi extended his hand all the way to your legs, to the center of your heat. You understood immediately what he tried to say. Instinct overtook you causing a certain shyness as he touched the outside skin of your cunt but it only took him one more deep kiss to dissolve all mental insecurity. Once he gained access, Yoongi opened his eyes wide and smiled.

“You aren't wearing nothing underneath” he said in a hot, husky voice. Yoongi’s fingers manages to take access of your already wet and hot pussy and dexterously finds

your clit tracing circles around it, playing with it like the button of a game console and you were his play game. The movement was sure to cause a sweet delightful moan to escape cursing the gods at how good that felt.

“I didn't think….ah….I would need it” you were struggling to think but with him touching you that way you were barely thinking straight “can’t believe this feels so good”

“Do you doubt my sexual abilities?” Yoongi introduces a nipple in his mouth, his tongue slowly dragging and licking them. This man is out to make you crazy. The mix of having him play with the sensitivity of both your clit and your nipple was enough to have you squirming and moving your hips back and forth.

“An office man who spends 75 percent of the time scowling shouldn’t be THIS good at sex” you joked, only causing him to increase the speed of his fingers causing you to scream at the increasing waves pleasure. You were close to the edge, so close you were just in the brink of deep diving into an orgasm, when suddenly Yoongi’s lips abandon your breast, slowly slithers down to your crotch, and smiles devilishly.

“Lucky for you, I love to prove people wrong”

If you were already dying of pleasure, it only took only stroke of his tongue in your clit to have you plunge into the most mind boggling orgasm you ever had in your life. Your thighs were trembling as Yoongi’s head was still between them. He grabs them with his hands to keep them still at the risk of you almost asphyxiating him trying to shut them close by instinct. In no moment does his tongue stop stroking your folds, eating you up like a starving man, drinking your fluids as if they were ambrosia in his mouth.

“So tasty…” You could see Yoongi’s mouth shining bright with your cum. You pulled him back to where you were as you kissed him again. Knowing well that if he stayed there any longer you continue driving you mad. He only kept kissing you till you were left without any air, lips swollen and the taste of your cum lingering in your mouth. You pulled his pajama bottom deciding that it wasn’t fair that only one of you to was so indecently naked but you were met with yet another surprise. Revealing that not only did he not have any underwear as well but his dick sprung out making your eyes widen at the sight. To say that Yoongi was well endowed was an understatement. The image of his hard cock making your mouth water.

“Holy shit your beautiful” you whispered.

“But not like you” Yoongi said “are you sure you want this?” Always a gentleman who asks for permission even when you know well enough he’s at the verge of losing his mind. He grabbed your chin and made head raise and see him eye to eye. “Use your words, Baby”

It was such a cute term of endearment that coming from his lips seemed foreign to you but delightful. You get close to him, your breath tickling his ear as you say in low husky voice, “Min Yoongi, I want your thick throbbing cock inside my wet hot pussy.”

You were never much for dirty talk. The words just naturally escaped your lips as if you’ve been saying them for a lifetime but as soo. As they were out there being heard by Yoongi your cheeks turned a deep red, a reaction that didn’t go unnoticed by him.

The man kissed your shoulder and touched the skin of your back causing a shiver to run all over. You just closed her eyes and let him do all the exploring he wanted. At this point he could fuck the everloving lights out of you and you wouldn’t mind. He grabbed something from his pocket, put on a condom as he continued to kiss your skin.

“Yoongi, I need you inside me…please…” you breathed heavily.

“As you wish my dear” Yoongi said positions his cock right in your hot entrance. The movement is slow but having your pussy all wet after your first orgasm helped the entrance of his cock a much smoother experience. You could feel him filling your walls, initially with a little bit of pain but soon it was replaced by delicious pleasure.

In a matter of minutes the pace increases quickly growing the intensity of each thrust. Perhaps it was the lack of sexual activity for both of you but it was euphoric to have each other become one. The tightness of your cunt welcoming his throbbing cock as if the gods themselves sang in heaven for this hot, dirty and wild reunion of your bodies.

You looked at Yoongi as he entered you, a drop of sweat starting to roll down his temple. His eyes were darkened with that intense desire you saw before but now the fire in his stare had increased to hellish levels. “Fuck I’ve been wanting to do this for so long! Who’s offering a slow trip to pleasure now?”

The reminder of your first encounter had been long forgotten but the phrase switched all memories on. To think he remembered after all this time made you smile in tenderness but the feeling was soon fucked away. His thrust become hard causing you to cry and whimper in an exquisite pain. “If I would have known….it was this good… I would have fucked you right that moment” you pant breathlessly meeting his hips with each trust.

The ripples of the oncoming orgasm was coming too soon for both of you. “That’s it baby, cum on my fucking cock” the obscene command echoed in your mind. Your mind, your body, your feelings and sensations were all in this man's hands. Your mind was drowning in the feeling, drowned in Yoongi…Yoongi… Yoongi….

“YOONGI” You screamed as your body convulsed in an overwhelming orgasm peaked all over your body, eyes opening wide rolling back as you were set in this high.

It was heaven, it was madness, it was bliss, it was sin. All at the same time. The orgasm you felt before was nothing compared to the feeling of coming on Yoongi’s dick,

It didn’t take long for him to follow after you. His final thrusts becoming sloppy and uncoordinated until he releases his cum while inside you. You kissed his temples tasting the salty taste of his sweat and holding him tightly against you. Both of you didn’t want to let go of the moment, basking in the sexual afterglow.

“It’s too perfect!” You thought.

Suddenly they heard a something ring. Yoongi and you opened your eyes to see Yoongi’s pager go off. Seriously he must be the only person in existence to actually use one of those other than a doctor. He slowly let you go and went to grab the dreaded device.

“Damn, it's my boss” Yoongi rubbed his temples. As your mind settled in a thousand thoughts came running through. Almost like destiny...like karma…was this truly destiny though? Did Yoongi even like you or was it just the suggestive idea that brought forth interest of love and sex? And it wasn’t even love because he never said those words... neither did you. He turned around saw a disappointed frown grow on your face as you grabbed your clothes, “wait what are you doing?”

“Yoongi, I want you to be completely honest. If Madame Karma hadn’t told us that we were soulmates would you have made love to me?”

Would he? He knew he was attracted to you since the first day but it was only attraction. He wanted to say yes. But he himself wasn’t sure if what he felt was love. Never having experiences it makes it harder to distinguish. You take his silence as a sufficient answer.

“I know that what we just had was good, but is this really what we truly want or just what we think we want only because it was introduced to our mind? Plus I have my life and my coffee shop you’re my manager, that wouldn’t be the best thing to do professionally. I can't let you stop your job because of me. And even when all of this was amazing, I know we are very different from one another.”

“So you are regretting it” Yoongi tried to conclude.

“No it's not that! This had to happen sooner or later” You blushed “I admit I was hoping we would. But we work together, it would be a bit hard for us.”

“Let’s forget this” Yoongi said coldly, “you’re right, you work under me. Professionally it would not be wise” It sounded a bit harsh but it was true, this would make their work relation worse than what it already was. He got his clothes back on and for the rest of the night maintained a cordial silence between each other. Thankfully it didn’t last long since the car aids came just a few moments later. Once they had their cars fixed, they both went their different ways.

"Yes" you thought "Its best we kept our distance"

"Can't say I failed" Yoongi thought "I must have fallen in the temptation of the night. I mean it is Valentines Day. Even so…"

"I am never going to forget this night no matter how hard I try" you both thought.

[seven-oomen]

First, I swear I’ll explain about the picture in a minute.

Next, it’s totally okay, I understand completely.  I, too, am prone to being a total space cadet sometimes.  My top skills are remembering/thinking of things when I’m in no position to act on them (composing review questions while at work, thinking of phone call I forgot to make while driving, realizing I didn’t show my mom the sonogram my friend sent me right as I fall asleep, etc.)  Really, I’m just happy finding others to talk about this stuff with who seem to appreciate and enjoy it as much as I do. :D

Omg, I’m SO EXCITED to see the necklace turn up, however that happens!  And as someone who 90% of the time also uses drinkware featuring superheroes and other nerdery for their alcohol, I very much approve Derek’s choices, whether it makes it into the story or not.  I also enjoyed both versions of the chapter flashback, but the first was definitely more “Oh My…”, and the redo more straight up fluffy and adorable. 

And I love all that stuff in the ideas tag!  With Corey there’s so much potential stuff that can be done with someone with those types of powers.  I admit I don’t know too much about exactly how his are supposed to work. his powers are due to genetics and not outside forces in this, could it perhaps be connected to how Gerard has been able to do some of the things he’s done?   (Could the wolves track him while invisible in the show?)  And oh, my God, that is a total Moon Moon moment (resisting the urge to make a comment about why Ian was trying to fit a ball in his mouth).  I choose to believe that Noah and Chris coordinated to trick Peter into doing that and managing to get it on camera.  They threaten to make it part of the family Christmas card.  Peter only agrees if they make it so that all the pictures used embarrass everyone equally.  Which is where some of the BTS type stuff could come in.  (My lord, they are all such dorks.  I mean, I follow Ian, Linden, JR, and Hoechlin on Insta and or Twitter, so we been knew, really, but still. XD )  And I’m all for any plot points or incidents that allow Lydia to showcase just how awesome she truly is.  Also, I will never turn down an idea that involves puppy piles and cuddle puddles.  I’ve been in this fandom too damn long not to have developed a deep-seated love for damaged characters getting the affection and comfort they deserve.

I’m so glad you’re enjoying the examples of my often questionable musical tastes. ;D  I think I first heard that song on an anime music video (for LOVELESS I think, of all things), and I was just like “well this is catchy as hell”.  As someone whose musical tastes are all over the gd place, I like to imagine they all have some genre that they’re secretly a fan of but don’t want to admit to because it might clash with their grunge-y punk image (the other two totally know anyway.)  Speculatively I’d say boy bands for Peter, bubblegum pop/pop-punk for Chris, and classic (read: dad) rock for Noah, but I welcome other opinions. 

And jsyk, it really makes me happy to know that my reviews are helpful for more than just story ideas.  Which partially brings me to the picture I’ve attached.  I work in a pet supply store, and the item on the right is a dog toy we carry and every time I look at it, all I can think of is how much it reminds me of Deucalion.  Like, I can’t not see it at this point.  And nobody I work with would have the slightest idea what I’m talking about, so I finally made this so that I could share it those that might get why it’s so funny to me.  So here it is.  And if you are still in need of things for distractions, here is a list of some random incidents that have (mostly) occurred at my work in the last few days:

1) Someone left a 4 Iron in one of our shopping carts along the far wall of the store.  We have no clue where it came from, we aren’t anywhere near any kind of golf or sporting goods store.  (I checked and there was no sign of blood on it, so no one was ditching a weapon on us or something.)

2) I walked into our warehouse and asked “why does it smell like sparklers in here?”, saw a coworker standing looking out the back door, and walked over to see that there was a car on fire about a block away in another parking lot.  (The fire department was already on scene putting it out, it looked like it started near the front driver’s side tire?)

3) A child ate one of the fancy dog treats we have on display (luckily that one is mainly yoghurt and peppermint extract), and then try to drink from the fountain we have set up for any dogs that come in.  I don’t think mom ever noticed.

4) We now carry a special, highly filtered, and ph-balanced (and overpriced) bottled cat water (no really), that seems simultaneously like a brilliant idea (because UTIs), but also somehow one of the whitest things I’ve ever seen (and I say this as a white person who grew up basically middle-class).

5) One of the smoke alarms in my apartment started doing the dead battery warning beep at around midnight Sunday night.  I unfortunately was out of the size I needed to replace it, so I just popped out the one that was in it.  Turns out it’s also hardwired, so that did nothing.  It beeped the entire night.  I would have gotten worried about my neighbors, but they had one that they let beep for like a week back in Feb, so I decided I didn’t care.  When I stopped to buy a replacement I also ended up buying two bags of candy with the justification that they were on sale and I might need them for the next chapter.

6) Our pet bathing area re-opened, which meant we finally got a visit from one of my fave canine customers.  His name is Jax, he’s an American Akita, and he is a gigantic, sweet, bear of a dog.  Seriously, he comes to about my hip (I’m right around 5'4), weighs around 190lbs, and is a beautiful dark brown/black brindle all over.  He is also one of the most calm, chill dogs I have ever met (he’s been coming in for years), and I love to watch other people react to seeing him for the first time.

7) While searching around my music files and Spotify for suggestions, I got distracted and ended up treating my neighbors to an impromptu concert that consisted mostly of 00s divas and 60s bubblegum pop (oddly, a lot of Herman’s Hermits and Ohio Express has a very similar vibe to Bowling for Soup, to me at least), because I had headphones in, and didn’t realize I’d started singing along for…a while.  I did consider apologizing for that, at least, but ultimately decided to just ignore that it happened.

Anyway, I hope you are feeling a bit better now, and that some of the weirdness that is my life at least provides some entertainment.  And that the therapy session at least feels like something you think will help in the long run, even if it sucks massively right now.  I’m so proud of you for going, and sticking with it (I know so many who need to who don’t, for whatever reason).  It is hard, and exhausting, and I am always awed by those that are determined to see it through.  (Sorry if any of that comes across weird.  My automatic supportive defaults tend to be humor and awkward sincerity, and I always worry that one will come across as the other and vice versa.  Social anxiety is a hell of a drug.)  So, I’m gonna go ahead and wrap up the verbal flailing for now, please enjoy whenever you see this tomorrow (I think?  I’m terrible about keeping track of that sort of thing.  Also, how is most of Europe just one time zone?!  …anyway…)

Ok, I need to find out where I can get that crocodile/Alligator. for uh, for Mo...

Yeah for Mo.

(It’s for me, I would totally buy a dog toy if I thought it looked adorable.)

I definitely toned that scene down, though I kept some necessary exposition where Chris thinks on what happened between them. Might include some teenage raunchiness later, as someone pointed out to me, Peter would definitely be like that, as would Noah (probably). Chris would definitely be more reserved, he barely got a sex education aside from abstinence. ( Because I don’t see Gerard as the type of person who’d give his son the talk, honestly.)  

And as someone who also drinks alcohol in superhero or Halloween glasses and mugs, I had to throw Derek’s very mature choice in there. Batman mug stays XD

I’ll admit, that was exactly what I was thinking with Corey’s power and how I could use it in the story. So I’m curious to see where I’ll go with it eventually, but yeah, that’s on my idea list.

.. must resist Ian & JR ballsy jokes.. you are not twelve Ben.

I am.

I really am. A twelve-year-old in a twenty-nine-year-old body.

I bet Ian wanted to prove what he could fit in there. He wanted to show some ballsy moves. It’s practice for-

Okay, I’ll stop.

And they are the biggest dorks, I follow Ian, JR, Colton, and Holland on and my lord, they’re such dorks. Definitely following Linden now too though. hehe.

I can see them trying that trick with Jackson, Malia, Ben, and Scott as well. Scott just falls face first and tries to fit a tennis ball into his mouth. Ben just looks at the tennis ball, figures that ain’t gonna fit and balances it on his face instead. Malia opens her mouth, notices the camera coming out, and just poses while smiling at the camera. Jackson though pretends to not understand what he has to do until Chris shows him how it’s done and then Jackson quickly points to Chris and while Noah films it laughing his ass off.

They make an awesome Christmas card with all of them doing something with that tennis ball.

Speculatively I’d say boy bands for Peter, bubblegum pop/pop-punk for Chris, and classic (read: dad) rock for Noah, but I welcome other opinions.

SO MUCH YES.

Also, Nickelback for Chris & Never gonna give you up. They're guilty pleasures. I would also like to suggest for Peter, either the Spice girls or like the Vengaboys. Gets him going but only when he’s alone at home and he’s wearing headphones. Because God forbids someone else hears it too. And I kinda wanna say Baby Metal for Noah. Idk seems like that might fit him and it’s hilarious to think about. Some headcanons don’t need to make sense.

Also, just for shits and giggles.

Caramelldansen in English and Swedish. 

Makes these dads (and Melissa and Derek) move and dance around the new house like crazy, Ben joins in, because of the funny voices. 

The teenagers are mortified.

MORTIFIED.

This made me so happy, 

3) A child ate one of the fancy dog treats we have on display (luckily that one is mainly yoghurt and peppermint extract), and then try to drink from the fountain we have set up for any dogs that come in.  I don’t think mom ever noticed.

I feel like that’s basically toddler behavior. Also, Ben did this at some point. One hundred percent. He walked into the pet section at a store and started eating the dog treats. Chris didn’t notice, Peter did, asked him about it and went; well, it’s probably not toxic for him, so whatever. He did film it. Noah and Chris yelled at him.

4) We now carry a special, highly filtered, and ph-balanced (and overpriced) bottled cat water (no really), that seems simultaneously like a brilliant idea (because UTIs), but also somehow one of the whitest things I’ve ever seen (and I say this as a white person who grew up basically middle-class).

That is the whitest shit I’ve ever heard. And yes I’m white too from lower middle class. But still...

But maybe that’s because I live in a country where I can drink tap water so that’s what Mo gets in his fountain.

And your stories made me smile my friend, every single one. <3 thank you for sharing these.

I wish I had funny ones really. Only one I can think of is some of my customers I run into as a tech support guy.

Customer calls me to tell me they don’t have internet. I ask, “Where’s your modem and how is it plugged into the network?”

Customer: It’s still in the box I received it in.. it’s wireless..”

Me: 

Cue ten-minute argument on how it’s not wireless like that and how he needs to install his modem... yeah. People and technology...

But anyway, I’ll stop rambling now because it’s 1 am here and I need to go to sleep again.

1 am is in the Amsterdam/Berlin timezone where I live in.

That is 6 pm in NYC

And 4 pm in California.

So I am 7-9 hours ahead of the US, to give you an idea about timezones.

[anethara]

End of Year Inventory

First things first, did you have a good year?

I had a wild fucking ride this year. A lot of change hit me all at once and while I vaguely remember the bad, the good and the great stands out vividly in my mind. 

How old did you turn this year?

Twenty-eight.

Do you feel your age?

I don’t even know what that means. I have a lot more of the material trappings of “adulthood.” But I’m also borrowing time on adolescence with HRT and going to college. I definitely feel like an adult, though, so sure. 

Did your appearance change in anyway?

I went blond (again); I went silver for like, a month; I went back to blond. I achieved my desired fashion aesthetic (mostly black; occasional jarring patterns; occult symbolism). I upgraded to a double nose ring. 

Post your favorite selfie.

If you traveled, where did you go?

2019 was the year of travel for me. I went to California twice: once by air, once by road trip. Both trips were great but the road trip was great; I loved bonding with my best friends and my wife and getting to see one of the last remaining states I’d missed out on. I also traveled to New Jersey and New York to see my dad and his family. It took three tragic losses all right in a row to get me out there, which I deeply regret, but I had a great time and I was so happy that my dad got to meet my wife (finally!). In October, I went back to Maine to attend my oldest friend’s wedding and had a damn good time; I also got to see my mom for the first time in five years. 

Which fashion trends did you love?

I haven’t been paying attention. 

Which fashion trends did you hate?

Red baseball caps. You know the ones.

What was your favorite article of clothing this year? Post a pic if possible?

I got a black tank top featuring The Lovers as two skeletons embracing that I really dig. 

What song sums up this year for you?

I won’t lie, it felt like a 7 Rings kind of year. Congratulations also hits a little different in 2019.

What album has been on heavy rotation this year?

The albums I’ve listened to the most this year are, according to my chosen music software: Amo by Bring Me the Horizon, Beautiful Death by Slaves, Peach Club by Emarosa, Help Us Stranger by The Raconteurs, Let’s Rock by The Black Keys, The Black Panther Soundtrack, Pain Killer by Little Big Town, Lunatic by Kongos, Wild Horse by Rae Lynn, and Ghosts by Smoke Fairies.  

What was your favorite movie of the year?

I didn’t see anything that came out this year (I don’t think…) but my favorite movie I was introduced to this year was A Quiet Place.

Did an actor/actress catch your attention for the first time this year?

No one comes to mind.

Favorite new TV show?

My favorite TV show is the same as last year: The Haunting of Hill House. I am, however, extremely excited for the anthology to continue next year.

Which new ship/fandom has taken over a lot of your time, attention, and tears?

My favorite ship remains steadfastly my Skyrim Dragonborn, Ari, with Rory’s Dragonborn, Nikolaj. 

What food did you try for the first time?

I tried so many new foods this year, I can’t remember them all. My favorite was Korean Barbeque.

Did you make any big permanent changes this year?

I moved into a house. I also began the first stages of some hardcore oral surgery (stages 2-4 coming in 2020). 

What was one nice thing you did for someone else?

I tried to provide for others, this year. I donated as much food and clothing and toiletries to the homeless as possible. I tried to give money when I could. I tried to take friends out for meals. I tried to offer to pay for things people needed and I tried to buy little luxuries people couldn’t otherwise enjoy. I hope it helped. 

What was one nice thing you did for yourself?

I quit my job and visited my family and focused on school and my health.

Did you develop a new obsession?

Hill House was watched probably ten times in this house, and we only moved in back in April. 

Did you vote?

I did! (Thanks Steff…)

Did you move?

I did, hopefully for the last time.

Did you get a job?

I quit one, actually.

Did you get a pet?

Kind of! I gained a dog when Rory moved in.

Do you regret not doing anything?

No, because there’s nothing I didn’t do this year. 

Do you regret doing something?

I regret procrastinating on my surgery, but the timing was just all fucked.

Have you done anything that scared you?

Quitting my job; going to college; going through with a three-part surgery.

Did anyone/thing make you so mad it stayed with you for days?

I got into a nasty traffic altercation that culminated in my having to get out of my car in stand-still traffic on the highway and threaten violence before it was resolved. That had be pissed for a good three or four days.

Did you lose anyone close to you?

I think I lost a friend. The last time I heard from her was a text that read ‘I don’t remember what you’re responding to. I don’t even try texting with you anymore.’ It was my fault, but I realized that if it’s gotten this bad, the friendship was likely decaying anyway and it’s probably better for both of us to move on. 

Did you fall in love?

I keep falling deeper and deeper in love with Steff as the years pass. 

Did you fall out of love?

Yeah, with menial, dead-end retail labor.

Did you start a new relationship?

Kind of.

Did you go through a break up?

See aforementioned friendship I neglected.

Did you have to cut ties to someone?

I didn’t have to, but I did it anyway.

Who was important to you this year but wasn’t important last year?

I don’t think there’s anyone currently in my life who hasn’t been important to me for at least three years.

Who wasn’t as important to you this year as they were last year?

The friend I had to let go.

If you could have a do over on one thing you did, would you take it?

Yeah, I would have booked my trip to Maine a lot earlier, and for four days instead of one.

What was the best moment of the year for you?

So many great moments happened this year. Closing on the house; road-tripping with Rory; seeing my family again; being back in Lavalette and New York City; being back in Maine; getting to watch my best friend get married; getting my grades back for fall quarter… It’s been a good year.

What was the worst?

The worst thing to happen to me all year was when my car battery died and the air pressure went out of my tires unexpectedly in the school parking lot and if that’s the hardest thing I had to deal with all year? What a breath of fresh air.

Did anything happen that you were sure would change you as a person but it really didn’t?

Nothing comes to mind.

Did anything happen to you that you were sure wouldn’t change you as a person but it did?

Transition marches on, and that’s had a continual effect on my personality and behavior. 

What are you most proud of accomplishing?

Maintaining a 4.0 GPA despite struggling with two major papers, an intensive career project, an impromptu oral presentation, and literally every fucking social experiment demanded of me by my chaotic psych professor.

What have you learned about yourself this year that you didn’t know in the years prior?

I really don’t trust, and I really struggle to believe people can be reliable or stable. I’m working on it.

Did your opinion of anyone change for the better?

No one I know personally.

Did your opinion of anyone change for worse?

See above.

If you make resolutions, did you complete them this year?

I knew 2019 was going to be bonkers, so I didn’t make any promises.

If you make resolutions, what will your resolutions be for the coming year?

I want to reinstate healthy habits. 

If you could go on an adventure during the remaining days of the year, where would you go and what would you do?  Who would you go this?

I’m all adventured out, to be honest. I’d rather just hang out at home with my wife and my family.

What do you wish for others for the coming year?

Good omens; cash flow; good luck with cars; steady work and good health.

What do you wish for yourself?

A steady mental incline, physical improvement, and a 3.7 GPA.