#all the nurses I knew on the floor were busy when I left so I couldn’t brag to them so you guys get it instead

[andhumanslovedstories]

Boy we don’t treat chronic pain patients well, huh. I had a patient tonight who was adamant that the hospitalist I paged wasn’t going to order an extra dose of oxycodone to address the acute pain they were having on top of their chronic pain. They were so convinced that at one point I found myself saying, “the doc ordered it! We got it! Here it is! The thing you are saying is impossible and unattainable is in my hand as we speak!” I had to interrupt them mid-sentence to say this. I had to wiggle the med cup at the patient until they processed it. I’ve never had to work so hard to convince someone of the existence of ten milligrams of oxycodone.

[jensthwa]

i was made for lovin' you (PSH x reader)

part of the love's an uncharted path universe ★.

SUMMARY:

In an attempt to grasp at his youth, Seonghwa buys a motorcycle despite not knowing the first thing about them. When it inevitably breaks down, he has no other option that to ride it to a mechanic shop and, after following a sweet hum, he’s faced with the life-changing (and predictable) fact that, maybe, what he needed after all was not a motorcycle. Maybe, just maybe, what he needed was you.  

PAIRING: new bike owner!seonghwa x afab mechanic!reader.

GENRE: strangers to lovers.

WORD COUNT: 20k.

WARNINGS: SMUT ☽ (MINORS DNI) attempt !!! at comedy, dual pov (both seonghwa's and reader's), wooyoung being a little shit for the umpteenth time + jongho, yeosang AND hongjoong (omg), that feeling you get when your youth is ending, midlife crisis! (or so yunho says), a loooot of work related/motorcycle plot, flirting, seonghwa losing his rizz, reader is adopted so that may count as a trigger warning for some of you, shitty exes, crying a bit but not really, pet and nicknames (ghost, dear), they almost get caught in a thunderstorm, lots of tension, making out, oral ( f & m reciving ), descriptions of the female anatomy, floor AND protected sex ( wrap it up pls ), the ending leads straight up to the next story on this universe so be aware of that.

NOTES: hello everyone! after almost a month in the making, here you have it! THIS IS PART OF THE SHOW AND TELL UNIVERSE but can be read as a stand alone, although there's some characters and scenarios you can understand better if you read the last three parts (you can find them in my masterlist). this really didn't need to be so lenghty but it turned out that way for some reason (i'm the mayor of yap town). this is 100% self indulgent, as all fics should be, and i think i've re-read it so many times that if you find a typo or something that just doesn't make sense, you can blame it on english not being my first language i guess lmao. i hope you enjoy it and if you do feel free to send to my askbox/reblog/type in any feedback or thoughts! <3

POSTED: september 02 2024.

permanent taglist: @hotteokkay, @potatomountain, @fairylover68, @e3ellie, @alsomimi

masterlist.

Seonghwa is proud to be the type of person who can just tell what's going on after assessing a situation for a few seconds. 

His intuition is something he can rely on and he almost never misses the mark when he makes predictions that he doesn't share with anyone else in case it brings anyone down. 

As he watches San kissing his girlfriend's cheek and then stare at her like a lovestruck idiot, his mouth quirks up a bit and he quickly hides it behind the soda can he's been nursing for the past couple of minutes. 

He's happy it finally happened. 

He's also a little butthurt that he didn't get the chance to fully get to know her first. 

They've been together for a few months now, maybe four if he recalls correctly. Back then, he danced with her at Wooyoung's and San’s apartment like he didn't know one of his closest friends had been in love with her since they both were in highschool. 

He didn't tell anyone, but a part of him did it to see if it would prompt a reaction. And, from what he was told by Wooyoung, it did. 

She is his type of person, though. And when he texted her a few days later and she sent in a non-detailed voice note briefly explaining what went down after they all left the party and she stayed behind to help her drunk best friend, he told her he understood and that he kind of already knew. 

Or at least, he expected it. 

He also explained to San that, although his intentions with his girlfriend (before she was his girlfriend) were mostly genuine, he’s obviously not in love with her. 

After all, they only met that one time and now, back in San and Woo’s shared apartment for what feels like an overdue reunion after months of busy schedules and adult life, he can assure them both with a nod and smile that he is, indeed, happy for them. 

He treasures admiration for those who are able to find love in this modern age, anyway. 

Now there's two couples in the group. Seonghwa has never been the type of guy who chases relationships and has a goal set on when and how to get married. He simply exists and welcomes the opportunities life gives him as they come. 

That's how he got his job at Room for More. His professor gave him a recommendation letter after finishing the last presentation of his career and suggested he try his luck at his colleague’s company. 

And now he's actually doing what he studied to do and he's loving it. Working in interior design and fighting minimalism while he's at it? 

Incredible. Life could not be better. 

Kind of.

As rare as those types of opportunities are, he truly believes it is way easier to find a niche profession people are actually comfortable with than it is to find love in modern society. 

Life might give you your dream job out of nowhere, but it can also take away the opportunity of finding a partner you can celebrate your success with. 

He never even told his friends when he got the job. Only Hongjoong, who then passed on the word to the rest of the group and, after they all congratulated him for it, they quickly moved on to their thesis and focused on not letting their last year of university eat them up while they were at it. 

Except for Jongho, he very much had a few months left to ignore the unavoidable adulthood period he was about to suddenly enter his senior year. The rest of them, minus Hongjoong, had the right to grasp as much as they could of the freedom of only being weighed down by exams and not by other obligations like rent and bills. 

Wooyoung and San’s lease is being paid by their parents, so they don't really count. 

And Hongjoong lives with his bandmates in a little apartment above the rehearsal space provided by a lovely grandma who treats them all like they are her sons, so he doesn't really count either. 

Seonghwa feels like, in the span of a year, he took a whole step forward while everyone else is still enjoying their youth. Now, he has presentations and meetings with clients he needs to worry about. 

Love is not his top priority, not that it ever was, but now it barely crosses his mind. 

He just wants to stay cool and young for a few more years before giving in completely into feeling like an adult. 

So, naturally, what's the first idea that popped in his mind a few weeks ago when thinking about the inescapable passage of time? 

That he should definitely be a little more irresponsible with his finances. Why not? He's in the perfect period of his life where he's allowed to make a mistake without the fear of eternal judgment by a superior being. 

The superior being happens to be his mother, of course. Who else would it be? The woman could make a God shake in their shiny boots and silence them with a single scowl. 

She's all the way back in his hometown, though and she's really rooting for him to make it big in the city. 

Surely, she wouldn't mind if he bought a motorcycle to help him commute faster to his appointments, right? 

Well, he's about to find out any day now.

Looking out of the window that looks to the street, Seonghwa can see his new acquisition parked and sparkling under the streetlamp and the smile that it brings to his lips it's big enough for Yunho to bump him with his hip and lean against the window sill as well. 

“Who's making you smile like that?” he asks, looking away from Seonghwa and following his line of sight till it reaches the beautiful Bonneville he just got on a great deal with a guy who wanted to get rid of it. 

The auction post said that it was because it looked too vintage and the owner wanted to upgrade to something more ‘modern looking’. 

A fool, he thought. 

Because to him, this bike checks all his marks: it is modern enough that in case he needed to get any parts for it, it wouldn't make him lose his mind in the process. But also, it has that vintage, nostalgic, old film feel and look to it that is just right up his alley. 

He loves it. 

Huh, maybe he did find true love after all. 

And after breaking open his savings, Seonghwa managed to get a hold of it without financially ruining himself. Only a bit. 

He didn't tell any of his friends about it, maybe that's why Yunho whistles after he checks it out. 

“Now who's riding that baby?” 

“Me,” Seonghwa smiles, turning to his friend who, as the response dawns on him, drops his jaw and lets out an amused chuckle “What? That's my bike!” 

“Are you being serious?” 

“Why would I lie to you?” He returns, softly. 

A bit passes and then Yunho turns to everyone else scattered around the living room. 

“Guys, Seonghwa is having an early mid-life crisis and bought a motorcycle!” 

Yeosang gasps “Ain't no way…” 

“Hwa? A motorcycle?” Wooyoung hollers, louder than everyone else “What's next? Tattoos?!” 

Oh, for the love of God. 

Maybe there's a reason he didn't tell anyone until now. Everyone gathers around the window to look at it like children at a zoo and he takes a step back, sitting on the arm on the couch, a subtle smile on his lips. 

The only person that turns to him is San’s girlfriend, smiling proudly like he just won the lottery or something. 

Damn, she really is his type. 

“Are you happy?” She asks and it tugs at his lonely heart strings like crazy. 

He pushes through, nodding and shrugging a bit, dismissing his feelings for the final time. It's not really her, he reminds himself. It's the thought of having someone in his life that treats him the way she treats San. 

“Sure am,” he murmurs “My bank account? Not so much.” 

She laughs and Jongho turns to him at that “Are you an old man with debts now? Noooo,” he pouts “Who am I going to ask for bail money now?” 

Gyuri, Wooyoung's ex-girlfriend who somehow manages to stay friends with him, scoffs “You've never been to jail, kid.” 

“But he's the first person on my emergency contact list for that!” 

And just like that, they all pull away from the window and back into their seats to discuss the reasons why Jongho would end up behind bars. 

Being annoying seems to be winning. 

Seonghwa is glad to take the attention off of him. This way, he can't be caught staring at the way Mingi’s girlfriend sits on his lap and nuzzles her nose against her boyfriend’s neck. This way, the sigh he lets out when he catches San whispering sweet things into his girl’s ear gets lost amidst pointless banter and giggling. 

He shouldn't feel envious. 

But somehow he ended up wearing a green short-sleeve today, so it checks out. 

“Important client. Wants to renovate their whole space, his apartment and his office.” 

His boss is excited. It makes him smile as he stares at her with his hands behind his back, like he usually does when he receives instructions. 

“He loved your work, I showed him the photo studio you helped with last month and requested you specifically. He said that he feels trapped in a box every time he gets to work and everytime he returns home, so… He wants you to lead the project,” she smiles, tapping her manicured nails against her desk and cocking her head to the side “Congratulations, kid, you got your first big commission coming.” 

“Thank you so much,” he bows, his body bending out of pure gratefulness and instinct “I'll make sure to run everything by you accordingly, boss.” 

“Well, I'm expecting a report in two days.” 

“Two days?” 

“Mhm. He wants to meet with you this afternoon… In four hours, exactly. I already sent you an email with the details,” she gets up from her desk, extending her hand towards him and he rushes to shake it “You're doing the initial assessment today, alone. Everyone else has something going on.” 

Fuck. 

“Of course,” he's worried and anxious, but he makes sure none of it shows as he gives her hand a firmer shake before letting it go “I'll do my initial research in the meantime, then.” 

She nods and dismisses him with her hand. 

He stresses the whole time he looks up the name and company of this new client. It seems like a serious business, not the kind that wants to reject minimalism especially when the nation's professional aesthetic runs on it. 

It’s a modern tech silicon valley run by, what he's able to gather, a very rich family his new client is part of. There's a picture of them, smiling at an event, looking like the nightmare of working class people. 

He tends to keep his opinions on chaebol’s at bay (Yunho is his friend and he’s rich, so he can't really voice what he thinks so freely anyway) but the fact that they contacted his company, an interior design business with barely any recognition amongst their competitors, is both surprising and concerning. 

He clicks an article where his new client is featured. He's the heir of his family's empire, a tech savvy himself and he can tell, from the way they framed his answers, that he is well media-trained. 

Seonghwa has no name for himself. Why would he request him? He's not so sure the ambiance he helped to create in a mere photo studio is what is granting him this opportunity. 

His intuition is telling him, as he clicks for his initial research to print, that there must be an ulterior motive. 

But he's going to embrace the chance of securing his rent money either way. 

He just hopes his hair is presentable enough when he gets there. The helmet he bought is really not helping, the wind that somehow gets into it as he cruises through the streets doesn't help either.

Wanna know what else adds up to his problems today? The engine sounds weird. 

It sounds fucking weird. 

At a red light, Seonghwa lifts up his visor and tries to figure out what the hell is going on as much as he can. 

He's too green for this. Too new to this world. 

Would his mother scold him if she finds out he lied about doing a thorough research about the bike world before investing in one? 

He looks at his watch. He has time to spare, an hour and a half before the meeting takes place. 

Before he can fully make a decision, his body weight is making him turn into a street he doesn't know that well. But he's sure he saw a repair shop on the way to work today. 

Or was it just a body shop? Maybe he imagined it and the sudden panic he feels rising and darkening his cheeks under the visor is convincing him he's right. 

When he sees the floatable mascot waving in the wind, he lets out a sigh of relief. 

Pulling up, he sees a few cars with their hood open and a few new, modern bikes to the side, so he parks a few meters from them and when he turns off the engine and gets down from his -apparently- damaged new acquisition, he feels like he can finally breathe. 

No, scratch that, he takes his helmet off and then he's able to breathe. 

When he scans the place, there's not a soul in sight. 

Until he hears someone humming. It's a song he heard before, he can't quite put it together by the melody but it sounds like something he used to enjoy when he entertained the idea of joining Hongjoong's band all the way back in first semester of college. 

Something with heavy guitars, which kind of fits the place’s vibe. Looking around, he swears to himself he's trying to find the source of the humming.

After all, he doesn't have much time to take in the place.

But he does anyway. 

When he steps deeper into the shop, he feels like he's been teletransported into a decade he never got to experience, into a culture that is not his to experience in the first place. 

It's like a Sons of Anarchy set, something he would see in an indie two thousands movie, maybe. There's a lot of stuff laying around, an organized chaos he guesses he can attribute to the nature of this kind of job. 

But there's also a lot on the walls, aside from the usual tools hanging from it that look worn out there's posters and the Harley Davidson logo plastered at least five times in shirts, hats and jacket applique patches. 

He thinks the walls can be painted a new, muted color instead of the sort-of bright blue and beige they have going on. 

Focus. What the hell. 

Shaking his head, he follows the sound of the voice until he reaches the back of the shop. There's what it looks like an office, maybe a reception? With a door that's wide open and seems to lead to a storage he doesn't need to get in to. 

There, on her knees, he sees the source of the sound: A girl. 

A beautiful, beautiful girl. 

With her hair out of her face and overalls that seem too loose on her frame. 

Is his heart okay? It feels like it stopped beating. 

And then the beating comes back in full blast, goosebumps on his skin reminding him to speak up. Clearing his throat softly, he does. 

“Hello?” 

“Oh, shit,” she drops whatever she's working on, stops writing something down on a notebook that looks like it's about to run out of space “You fucking scared me!” 

“I can… see that. I'm sorry.” 

“Did you float all the way down here? Fucking Christ,” she mumbles something under her breath, getting up from her position and leaning into the desk in a way Seonghwa will probably remember forever. He gulps “What can I help you with, Ghost?” 

She's breathtakingly beautiful and he, who's usually smooth with words and random interactions, stammers out his response “H-hey, yes I… I'm Park Seonghwa,” he starts, smiling a bit “I was hoping there was someone here who can help me with my bike?” 

She looks around and he assumes she's looking for someone until he sees the corner of her lip curving up a bit “As I said, what can I help you with?” 

Did he already fuck this whole thing up? 

“Oh! I wasn't suggesting that you couldn't— I mean that's not what I…” her smirks widens, he suddenly remembers he's running out of time so he gets it together “I just bought a motorcycle and I'm sure the engine is not supposed to sound the way it's sounding so I thought I could use someone taking a look?” He gets out as fast as he can and the stranger claps her hands in a way that makes him take a step back. 

She intimidates him. Just a little bit. 

“First time owner?” She asks but he's sure she already knows. 

Chuckling nervously, Seonghwa nods “What gave it away?” 

“Your gear,” she simply states, getting out from behind the desk and into the garage space, moving swiftly through it like she owns the place. Damn, does she own the place? “You're barely wearing any. I get it, it's stuffy,” she turns over her shoulder to smile at him “It'll grow on you.” 

“More like I'll get used to it, I feel like.” 

“Yeah,” she rounds a car, tapping the hood of it and taking a pause as she scans the front of the place “That's what I said.” 

That's definitely not what she said. 

He's not sure if she's being rude or merely sarcastic, but he shouldn't be enjoying it the way he is. What drags him out of it is the way laughs when she sees his bike “This one?”

Concerning. Danger. Why is she laughing?! 

“Y-yeah.” 

“I don't get to see this type of bike often. Damn, she's beautiful.” 

He smiles, taking down his worries a notch “Yeah, I got a great deal for it. The guy said he wanted something like that instead,” he points at the one right next to his “Said he wanted something that looked out of Terminator. I didn't have the heart to tell him that they used a Harley Davidson for the movies.” 

“I'm guessing he meant Robocop?” 

“Maybe.”

“What an idiot,” she sighs, inspecting his bike closely “Not you, Park Seonghwa, the guy who sold you this. Key.” 

Key? Oh, right, the key. He tosses it to her and she catches it with expertise. 

“Well, thanks for clarifying that.” 

She laughs again, taking his helmet that's resting on the seat and putting it down on the floor as she straddles the bike “You're welcome,” she starts it, revs the engine a few times and then grimaces in a way that makes Seonghwa’s heart drop to his ass “Okay, Ghost, please tell me you have time to spare today.” 

“I actually don't,” he takes a few steps, worried frown on his face that prompts another sigh from her “I have a very, very important appointment in…” he checks his watch “In an hour that I really, really need to get to and— Is it that bad?” 

“No! No, not at all, I'm just better with cars than with bikes but, uhm… My brother is coming back in around fifteen minutes?” She offers and with the scowl on his face, she seems to backtrack “Listen, Park Seonghwa, why don't you leave your number with me and we can get this fixed by the end of the day. You can come by to pick it up or we can drop it to you early, tomorrow.” 

“Would you? Oh, my God,” he lets out another nervous laugh “That would be amazing, actually.” 

“Yeah, it's probably just the chain tensioner that needs an adjustment. Nothing's wrong with the engine as far as I can tell but that's why I want the guy who specializes in this type of thing to check it out.” 

“Your brother.” 

“Exactly,” she nods, turning it off and getting off as quickly and if Seonghwa was a little less concerned that he might've waisted his money on an expensive motorcycle, he would've noticed the proximity and the way she looks him over  with a curious glint on her eye “So, Park Seonghwa, what's your number?” 

She takes a step to the side and offers him her phone after unlocking it. He reacts to that. 

“Oh, yeah, sure.” 

He doesn't notice the big smile she offers him either. He doesn't have time. He enters the digits fast and checks over them two times before saving the contact information and returning the phone. 

Checking his watch once again, he curses under his breath and looks at his baby with desperation, begging, praying that he doesn't have to spend a fortune on it. 

“I really have to go.” 

“I can see that,” she returns his words from before, smiling and leaning to rest her weight on the hood of the car she tapped earlier “Good luck with your, uh…” she looks him over one more than and this time he notices it, blushing like a teenager for some reason because of it “Business meeting?” 

The crossbody bag he's wearing probably gave him away, huh? 

“Yeah, yes. Thank you so much for all your help… Ian?” He reads the nametag on her overall and immediately thinks it is an unconventional name for a girl, but doesn't add anything about it “Thank you, thank you, thank you.” 

“I get it, you're grateful, now leave.” He catches on that she's pretending like his presence bothers her so he can hurry, which he's actually grateful for. 

It occurs to him that he could stare at her forever like an idiot if she didn't. 

“Okay, bye. Please tell me if I have to, uh, rob a bank or something to cover the cost.” 

She laughs again and it sounds pretty this time. 

What the fuck. 

“Sure,” she nods and he takes a few steps backwards until he's about to turn and then he hears her voice again, so he doesn't but he keeps walking “It's Y/N, by the way.” 

“Huh?” 

“My name is Y/N, Ian is my brother.” 

His heart beats loudly and he can't help but smile as wide as he possibly can “Ah, that makes more sense.”

“Goodbye, Park Seonghwa!” 

He finally turns and then screams back “Goodbye, Y/N!” as he's hurrying to raise his hand and call on a taxi who just passed the entrance like divine intervention, placed perfectly just for him. 

He misses the sudden blush on your cheeks because he's already in the cab by the time you reach the garage’s door to glance at the beautiful man one last time.

Seonghwa is right on time. With a few minutes to spare, actually. 

The building looks even more modernized than in pictures. He can even see some workers remodeling an office he passes on the way to the… third? Main desk he has to go to. 

It's a very big company and he can see the silicon valley aspect of it all once he notices the few different uniforms everyone is wearing. It seems like the building is one big, creative space and he likes it, but it does feel a little cold in a sense. 

“I'm looking for Mr. Kim? I have an appointment in… five minutes with him, I was sent from—”

“Room for More. Park Seonghwa is here.” The lady at the reception doesn't spare him a glance as she talks through her headset and he has to blink a few times, bowing briefly when she points towards the elevator to his right “Floor sixteen, the only big office on the floor.” 

“Thank you—” 

“Next!” 

Turning back, he sees there's some people lined up behind him and he quickly moves out of the way and towards the elevator that drops him, two minutes later, into the sixteenth floor. 

As he walks towards the big doors at the end of the hall, he feels so out of place his armpits start sweating even though it is a cold day and the heating is barely on. 

There's a few cubicles, glass separating them from the hall and, in consequence, forcing him to glance a few times out of curiosity. The uniforms and creativity that he saw downstairs is lost and all he can see is the nightmare he had once, when he thought he would end up working in a similar space: men in suits and women in pencil skirts typing away and printing reports he is never going to understand. 

Maybe that's why he's a bit surprised when he gets to Mr. Kim’s office and he's waiting by the door with a kind of ironed three piece suit and a few hairs out of place, toothy grin and open arms. 

“Mr. Park Seonghwa, thank you so much for taking the job!” 

He moves in to give him a brief hug he doesn't really get to reciprocate before he's moving away and into his office. 

“It's, um, a pleasure,” he stammers out, following him “Thank you so much for the opportunity, Mr. Kim— Wow.” 

“I know, I know,” his client sighs as he takes a box and throws it to the side of his desk. The space is a mess and both of them grimace at the sound of something breaking inside the cardboard “This is why I recruited you. I tried to do something myself and ended up with… Whatever this is.” 

Looking around, Seonghwa is able to see what he means. The walls are mismatched and there's an unfinished design on the one to his left. Someone started painting a tree and gave up after sketching out a few branches. 

“And please call me Soohyun. Everyone here already calls me Mr. Kim and it makes me feel like my father,” he adds, sitting down on his desk chair and pointing to the one in front of it “That's my sister’s work. She tried to help me but broke one of her nails trying to get the cap off a painting tube so… She left me with this mess.” 

Seonghwa smiles, sitting down in front of him and getting his sketchbook out of his bag. Seemingly excited, his client rests his arms on the desk and grins at him, expectantly. 

He seems a little childish, not like the guy he studied earlier today. He looks younger than what he actually is like this, in a space that mimics what Seonghwa picks up like impatience and boredom, maybe the desire of breaking free of a corporate jail. 

Now, he understands why he contacted Room for More. 

“So, Soohyun… What do you want me to do for this space?” 

He spends the rest of the day in the middle of the mess, getting to know Soohyun’s vision and learning about the company as he helps to pile up the boxes laying around and drawing different ideas down. When he tries to talk about a possible budget, the man silences him and tells him not to worry about it. 

The pretty girl he met earlier crosses his mind one time, when Soohyun asks him if he can stay later than anticipated to give him an excuse to get out of what he says it's about to be a very boring and pointless meeting. 

Her image, your image makes him smile and he wonders, for a second, what the hell are you doing with his bike. 

And if he gets to see you again. 

Your brother comes back like a whole two hours later, so you're grateful you didn't push your new client to waste fifteen minutes of his, apparently, very busy day. 

“He said he got a great deal for it?” you nod “This one is not even that old, I'm sure they still make them!” 

You shrug and your brother sighs.

“Maybe he got scammed.” 

“I didn't ask but I think it started making that noise today because he seemed… alarmed,” you tell him and Christian pushes his hair back before taking the key out of your open palm “He didn't stay because he had a business appointment or something. He looked very laid-back, though, not rich at all, so don't you dare overcharge him for this.” 

“Oh, so you liked him.” 

Rolling your eyes, you turn to open the hood of the car you're supposed to be working on instead of giving away information he should've listened to if he didn't tend to walk out mid-shift “Yeah, we're actually getting married next week.” 

“Well, that means I can dispute getting the whole garage once dad goes away.” 

You let out a groan but you smile a little as you try and remember where you left off last night. 

“The only way he can go away is if he's dead, Christian,” you remind him “And he's going to outlive both of us.” 

“Of course he is.” 

You're not sure if your dad has a will at all. You're not his real children after all, so If he does you're not sure you're included either. 

It's not hard to tell you're adopted, but you've known Christian since before it was decided you two would share a family and even a last name. 

You grew up together, the adoption home treated both of you decently enough so you two never struggled as much but the children your age were a different story entirely. They used to tug at your hair and push you to the ground during group activities and the only one who was brave enough to make them stop was Christian.  

So, when your dad showed up at the adoption home and picked him out of the hundred children, he told him he didn't want to go anywhere without you. 

Sure enough, your dad took one look at your frightened little face, hiding behind Christian like a coward, and filled out the paperwork twenty minutes later. 

You remember gaping at the director, waiting for him to do something about this six feet tattooed guy in his late thirties wanting to take you both away from the only home you ever knew, but you're grateful the system didn't give two craps about children back in the day. 

Not that it gives a crap about them now, but at least they're a little more careful with just handing out kids like that. 

Because it could've gone terribly wrong. You were sure, at eight years old, your hand grasping the seatbelt on the back seat of your new dad’s car, that it was about to go terribly wrong. 

But he turned out to be nothing but a kind, hardworking (with an amazing credit score, no criminal record and steady income), widowed man who was looking to fulfill his late wife’s dreams of having a family and someone to leave their business to. 

After all, she was the one who built the shop from the ground up. You desperately needed to know more of her and your dad made sure to let you know how amazing she was in every aspect. 

She became someone you looked up to, even if you never really knew her, maybe that's why you ended up working at the shop as well. 

And yet, you still don't think it belongs to you. Ian is the one your dad wanted to begin with, you're just an added bonus. 

You're not sure you want it, either. 

But there's not much you know outside of it. Your time in school was great, no one bullied you anymore and the tough skin you developed out of nowhere cushioned the typical jokes that kids and teenagers are apparently programmed to make. 

You never made fun of anyone with ill intentions, so you're not sure how true that statement is. 

Either way, you kind of know where they were coming from. You weren't particularly exceptional at any subject but you never got in trouble for anything either, so you just kind of floated in everyone's orbit until you graduated, never belonging to any specific group of people or participating on any extracurriculars to help you maintain your barely there friendships after graduation. 

This shop is truly all you got. And the family that comes with it, of course.

Your dad coughing in the back and the sound reaching your ears even when the sound of Park Seonghwa's damaged motorcycle is right next to you, reminds you that spending every second of your teenage years and early adult life learning all you could about how to fix a car was worth it. 

“Fucking chain tensioners.”

Smiling, you turn your head to your brother and he's already working on it “So it was the chain tensioner?” 

“Yeah,” he wipes the sweat off his forehead “it's always the fucking chain tensioner with these things.” 

You don't tell him you already knew that. 

“So you could get it fixed today?” 

“Yeah, yeah. He said he's coming back tonight?” 

“Oh, I kind of suggested dropping it off tomorrow so I'm not sure…”

“Y/N!” he scolds immediately and all you can give him in return is an innocent smile “I'm not dropping off shit tomorrow.” 

Turning back to the car, your smile grows into a cheeky one. 

“I never said you would do it.” 

He scoffs “If this is your way of flirting with people, I can see why you never got far with anyone befo— What the fuck?” 

Jaw slack, holding the greasy towel you sent flying into his direction a second ago, he throws it back and it lands by your feet. 

“Did I lie?” 

“Stop being an ass or the next thing I'm throwing your way are my bedazzled pliers.” 

Your dad’s voice behind you puts a stop into the petty and pointless bickering “Well, don't, I worked hard on those,” you smile at him and Ian all but sulks before returning to the task at hand “I expect you both to be done on whatever you're working tomorrow, by eight. We have dinner with the Lee’s.” 

Ah, dinner with your dad’s closest friends. Usual Tuesday shenanigans, of course, but it doesn't stop the nervous bubbling inside of you. 

You pray Deokhee can't make it (he rarely shows up) but you mutter out an okay in response even if you don't feel like going anyway. 

Nodding, he quickly looks over on what you're both doing before disappearing into the back of the shop again. You look down at your toolbox and find the bedazzled pliers your dad gave you as a part of your fourteen birthday gift with a tiny, grateful smile. 

The eternal loop of working in the same usual five, fixable problems on the cars that people drop off at the shop sets in afterwards. And, for the rest of the afternoon, you keep stealing glances at the Bonneville and wondering what type of man its owner is. 

You've always been drawn to pretty faces, even if it costed you your sanity only a few years back. Not that Christian or your dad or anyone else knew about it. 

The little secrets you keep give you some sense of identity, it sets you apart from the oil changes and calluses on your hands and they remind you of the brief aspirations you once had outside of all of this. 

When you dreamed of belonging to someone else and not just this family business, someone who you thought used to get you before he shattered your heart into a million pieces.

Deokhee thought cheating would not affect you.

Why? Oh, maybe because your edges were worn and rough and you've been through worse stuff before. 

What's worse than getting abandoned and picked out as an afterthought later in life?

Being abandoned and treated like an afterthought by the guy you wasted your teen years obsessing over, probably. 

Nothing breaks like a heart or whatever the song says. 

And, to his advantage, he knew you'd keep calm and collected and accepting of his ways because he never promised you the life you imagined for the both of you, even after giving yourself to him multiple times. 

Even after he told you how amazing you were. 

Even after he whispered how lucky he was to have you, hushed and hurried at the backdoor of his house that last time before he broke it off. 

Before he told you he found someone else. 

So you know wondering is a bad idea. You should not wonder about a client, at that. How unprofessional of you, how immature. 

But there was a spark this afternoon you never felt with anyone else. He was brave enough to joke around, even when you did try your best to intimidate him and lost tragically at one glimpse of his pretty smile. 

What's so wrong in indulging in a fantasy no one will ever know about? Heavens know you need one to keep you from smashing the wrench on the windshield of this old, ungrateful, misbehaving Chevrolet that's proving to be more difficult than any other car you've ever worked on before. 

It's only at ten after seven that you're allowed to think about Park Seonghwa without the guilt brought on by delusion. 

“There, fixed,” your brother says and, after starting the bike again, the noise is gone “Call your future husband and tell him to pick it up, I want to meet him.” 

Huffing, you reach for your phone and look at the recently added contact before shaking your head. 

Indulging in a fantasy it's fine, as long as you keep it to yourself. 

You get a chance to prove yourself wrong if you allow yourself to see him again. 

“Not a chance in hell.”

Couple of minutes pass and you fidget the whole time. You're hoping for a yes, so it can all die down tonight. Seonghwa’s lack of transportation and your fantasy included.

He doesn't respond the way you need him to. 

You hate that it makes you smile a bit. 

You glance at your brother and scrunch your nose in disapproval. Would it be nice to not go wherever he is and have time to actually get ready for dinner tomorrow? Yes. 

Do you want Christian to meet Seonghwa? No. That meeting would solidify everything else as a reality, it would pull you out of your little fantasy and you don't want that. 

You want to keep it (Seonghwa) to yourself for a while longer. 

You shouldn't be flirting, you really shouldn't. 

His flirting back puts you in a dangerous zone, a territory you desperately want to explore but can't. Shouldn't. 

Is it dumb of you to re-read the conversation at least eight times before going to bed? 

Probably. 

But you do anyway. 

When Seonghwa is finally walked downstairs by his new client, he's promised a meal by Hongjoong, only if he buys some beer on the way to his apartment. 

His roommates are apparently out and he didn't feel like going, although he didn't explain why. And when he gets there, Yeosang is also splayed out on the couch and with his laptop on his belly. 

“Hwa’s here!” 

“Oh, man, finally,” Hongjoong walks out of his room with wet hair and a towel around his neck “The takeout is getting cold. Come on!” 

He seems… Off. 

Seonghwa eyes Yeosang for an answer but the youngest just shrugs and sits straight on the couch as he closes his laptop. 

“Is everything alrig—” 

“I'll explain it to you when the time is right. Something's up with the band but it's nothing we can't fix.” 

“Okay…” Seonghwa sits down on the tiny table that somehow fits the three of them, the beers and the takeout with a tiny smile, knowing not to intervene until he's told to. 

Eating with his friends is like second nature to him. Everytime it happens, it's like a family dinner and everyone knows what to do and what to serve to everyone so, soon enough, they all have their chopsticks helping them get food into their mouths while they talk about their day. 

Seonghwa is nodding along, not sharing a lot because, well, work is work and he just tells them how excited he is for the new project and what he's planning on doing, he even shows them the mockups and drawings he spent the whole afternoon making, gaining supportive praise for it a second later. 

Yeosang looks up from his meal to him “So it's like a lot of little companies inside one company?” 

“Sort of,” Seonghwa smiles “I don't really get it, either, but that's okay. It doesn't seem like I have to get the concept of the company to plan this whole thing out, only what my client wants and that's… Very different from the company image.” 

He plans on saying something else but all train of thought gets interrupted when his phone dings right besides him. 

And he almost spills his beer on his pretty mockups trying to get to it fast enough. 

Only to end up disappointed, because it's not you but a discount notification from the food app he normally uses when he has the money to order in.  

It had to show up in his face, because what he hears next has the color draining from it “Oh?” 

Oh, God. 

It's like Wooyoung's spirit possessing Hongjoong, he sees it happen in real time and the wicked smile his friend sends in his direction is enough to know where it's all going. 

Yeosang sighs and eyes him with a tiny smile that says I'm on your side, but not really. 

“Hwa… The motorcycle, the looking at your phone waiting for something or someone… Are you seeing anyone?” 

“He obviously is!” 

“Yeosang! Stop feeding his delusions!” 

“So?” Hongjoong places his beer down, cocking his head to the side inquisitively and eyeing him up and down, like he can figure something out that way “Are you?” 

“No! I just… I met this girl today and—” 

“At the company?” 

“No! No, uh… My bike broke down and—” 

“Already?!” 

“Let him talk, hyung!” 

Letting out a sigh, Hongjoong sets his lips into a straight line that makes Seonghwa huff out a chuckle of disbelief “Thanks, Yeo. Anyway, my bike had a weird sound this morning and I took it to a shop, so the girl who's… In charge?” he frowns a little, because he's still not sure “Of the shop sent me a text a while ago saying that it's fixed, I was just checking if she sent anything else.” 

“And you like her.”

It's more than that, really. He can't even explain it, the smile tugging at his lips a dead giveaway of the whirlwind going inside his head at the thought of you. 

“Ye— No! No, I don't even know her.” 

He shouldn't feel so flustered, really, but the things he felt while looking at you earlier were weird and confusing and he needs to think straight before he lets it consume him. 

It felt a little too freeing for his liking. 

Free from what? He's not really able to pinpoint it. But it looks like he's going to have to. 

The way his friends are staring at him like they know something he doesn't it's annoying, but telling. 

“Okay, maybe I do like her a little.” 

Yeosang hums “Like her, like her or just… You know.” 

“I'm not sure…” 

“Well, figure it out!” Hongjoong is excited, almost jumping in his chair at the prospect of Seonghwa getting with someone “You have her number, ask her to… Meet you somewhere or whatever people do when they like someone.” 

“Ask her on a date, hyung. That's what this idiot is trying to say.” 

“Hey!” 

Seonghwa closes his eyes because he can't believe his friends are entertaining the idea, feeding the growing feeling inside his chest “I just met her today, though.” 

“And?” Hongjoong bites a piece of meat and shrugs, dismissively “Timing is never off when you like someone. Do something about it because I swear if I have to hear anyone else complaining about not getting with the girl they like because of timing I'll—” 

“Wait, who complained?” 

The table falls quiet as Seonghwa looks between his friends to find an answer but Yeosang just shakes his head and he gets it.

Not the time to talk about it. 

Hongjoong points at him with his chopsticks, threateningly “Do. Something. About. It. Anyway!” He gets up from his seat, points at Yeosang this time “Guess who almost got kicked out of college for messing around with the wrong crowd today?” 

“That's not what happened!” 

And Seonghwa swears he's focusing on the story Hongjoong is so eager to tell, on Yeosang’s ears turning pink at the mention of a girl he's never heard before, too. 

But all he can think about is you. 

The next day, after briefly stopping by his office, Seonghwa is back with a few coworkers who help with measurements and put their input in the assessment. He spends all day with it, too and, once again, serves as an excuse for Soohyun to get out of some meetings he's not interested in attending. 

As the day passes, he wonders how Soohyun maintains the important position he's in. Nepotism can't do everything for you, right? 

Right? 

But his new client seems down to earth enough to be aware of his advantages in an industry that's quick and cruel and doesn't hold too much space for laziness. 

So he lets it go because, well, he tends to judge but he can't really do much for people who actually deserve to be in charge. 

It's close to seven and Soohyun bidded him goodbye only a few minutes ago, saying sorry he can't walk him out because, at this time, he actually has an international call to make that can't be excused like the rest of his afternoon schedule. 

Seonghwa doesn't make it out of the office before getting stopped by a manicured hand to his chest. 

After the texts last night and Hongjoong's threats, he was practically ready to sprint downstairs to meet you (or whoever you sent) and get his bike back, maybe apologize for panicking and sending a whole ass sticker as a response instead of keeping the conversation going. 

And to see you again. God, he wants to break his Bonneville one more time just to get to see your pretty face again. 

He already idealized you in his head, which is bad and very amateur on his side, but no one needs to know that. 

But now he might have to keep all of that waiting for a few more minutes because there's someone staring at him like just committed a crime. A crime he's unaware of. 

“Who are you?” 

Her scowl tells him she's trying to get a read on him and he thinks he's transparent enough for it to be easy. If he really thinks about it, though, it looks like she wants to scare him a little bit. 

It doesn't work. 

“Um, Park Seonghwa,” he says and then points over his shoulder, to Soohyun’s office “I’m working on renovating Mr. Kim’s office?” 

“Oh, for fucks sake. Why can't no one in this family keep normal people around?” She peeks through his shoulder, the high heels she's wearing helping her with the task. Groaning, she turns around and starts heading for the elevator, mumbling something under her breath. 

The only thing he can make out of it it's something about supermodels and a it's not fair. 

She turns around briefly to look at him again and scoffs, clearly annoyed. 

“I feel like I know your face from somewhere else.” 

Seonghwa feels a little lost, but steps into the elevator when she does. Now he's afraid, maybe she's a crazy person but then it clicks. 

Clearly, he knows her from somewhere else too. 

“I'm sure the only place I've seen you before is on the news, Miss Kim,” he replies with a sheepish smile, shrugging a bit and hitting the main floor button on the panel “That's a nice tree, by the way.” 

“Excuse me?” 

“The one in Mr. Kim’s office?” he offers, turning to her “He told me his sister painted it and as far as I know, he only has one sister.” 

That brings a smile to her face and Seonghwa counts it as a small victory, for some reason. 

“Ah, so you did your research,” she nods “Please scrape it off the wall if needed. It made me bleed.” 

“He omitted that part.” 

“Of course he did, it was his fault. Anyway,” she shakes her head, stepping out of the elevator and walking ahead without waiting for him. She looks like the type of person who knows everyone else will follow and he does, but only out of curiosity “my brother has your number, yes, Mr. Park?” 

“I'm assuming he does or, at least, my company's numb—” 

“I'm not interested in your company, I'm interested in you.” 

She's also very forward. How could he not guess that from the way she carries herself around? 

“I don't usually do freelance work, Miss Kim.” 

As they both reach the main entrance, she turns around gracefully and with a, for what he can tell, very rehearsed smile tugging at her lips. 

“I'm not interested in your work either, Mr. Park.” 

That, he did guess, but it's disappointing either way. 

“Then what good am I to you?” 

Her grin widens “You'll see.” 

The sound of his Bonneville pulling up it's what gets him to turn away from the mischievous glint in the chaebol's eyes. 

And when he sees you take off a helmet that's not his and wave your hand at him, she blends into the background completely. 

You look good, hair down and probably freshly showered because there's a few droplets falling down from the ends of it to your shirt and leather jacket. Your hands are gloved up and all, like you've been riding bikes your whole life. 

He wonders if that's the case. God, he wants to get to know you so bad. 

“Oh God, not another one, I— Is she your girlfriend, Mr. Park?” 

His head snaps back, eyes wide and cheeks turning pink “N-no, I just met her yesterday, she… That's my bike, I had to get it fixed.” 

Pulling her bottom lip in with her teeth for a second, she nods and then takes two long strides into the direction of a car he didn't see until now “Perfect, then. She looks pretty cool,” she waves at you and he doesn't get to see if you wave back, too focused on getting the color out of his cheeks “Tell her I said that. Goodbye for now, Mr. Park.” 

Seonghwa wants to ask a million questions. What does she want? What does she mean goodbye for now? But he doesn't get to. She gets into the car and drives off and that leaves space for you to drive his bike again and pull up right in front of him this time. 

“Hope I didn't interrupt anything there, Ghost.”

A nervous chuckle abandons him and he manages to shake his head “No, no, she's… my client’s sister?” He offers and you smile, turning off the bike and getting off a second later “She said you're, um, cool.”

“And why would she say that?” 

“Because you look cool? I don't really know, don't question me,” he's sure the efforts he put on making the blush disappear were pointless, cheeks burning when you laugh at him “Thank you, Y/N.” 

“Don't thank me, Seonghwa, I didn't tell you how much it'll cost you yet.” 

He gulps. 

You take mercy on him and the way his eyes glisten with worry, laughing again “It's not too bad. It was the chain tensioner and my brother worked on it pretty fast, don't worry.” 

Relaxing, he takes his helmet and key off your offering hands with a tiny smile, touch lingering on your skin for a second too long “Did you enjoy seeing me suffer just now?” 

“A little bit,” you shrug and mutter your apologies although he can tell you're not sorry at all “I'll text you the invoice with the account you can send the money to?” 

No. 

He wants to say no and make you go with him to an ATM so he can pay in cash just to keep you around for a while longer, he doesn't want this interaction to be over. 

And he's usually very good at communicating things of this nature but something about you makes him giddy and nervous and his charisma is not able to keep up. 

It dawns on him that it's very weird to want to keep a stranger, someone he only met a day ago, in his life for as long as possible. 

Do you feel the same way? He wants you to feel the same way.

The unexpected desire sits on his chest heavily, making him take in a breath more shakily than he intended to. 

“Sure,” the words taste bitter on his tongue, his tone gives away that he doesn't really mean it and then said desire takes over, making him stammer the next words out “Do you want me to take you somewhere?” 

Surprised, you blink a few times and then look down at your own helmet for a second. He feels like he screwed up by asking you that. 

Of course, you don't feel the same way. Of course, you must have someone waiting for you already. 

Of course, of course, of fucking course. 

But just before he can backpedal on his offer, you're looking up, your mind made up and the same teasing smile you've been wearing ever since he saw you yesterday “It won't save you from the debt I'm about to put you through with that invoice but sure.” 

Seonghwa lets out a huff and chuckle all in the same breath, straddling his bike a second later “Ha, ha. Count it as a tip, Y/N.”

“Oh, I'm so telling my brother that,” you beam when he returns the joke and he moves a little, making space for you at the back “Somehow, I don't feel safe with you riding this bike, Ghost.” 

He ignites it and the whole thing shakes a bit before you can even put on the helmet, so he can't really refute that. 

“Do you want to ride it?” 

It's a second too late when he realizes the double meaning behind his own words, unintended, but there they are floating on the air around you both, electric and maybe one sided. 

But you don't back down, taking a step into his space and crowding him, almost towering over him even if he's on the bike and even if that makes him taller than you. It feels that way, so he welcomes the sensation and the pang of his heart against his chest when you lean in just a little. 

“Do you want me to ride it?” 

Breath caught in his throat, Seonghwa takes in your smirk as a sign that, maybe, it's not one sided at all. 

“The bike,” you clarify a second later, like it's necessary “It would be easier to get us to where I need to go, anyways.” 

Planting his feet on the ground, he keeps the Bonneville stable enough to slide back to the space he created for you a minute ago, and if you can feel his heart beating with an unfamiliar, yet exciting song when you take a seat, put your helmet on and press your back against his chest, you sure cover it up when you turn to look at him. 

“Does your fancy job provide you health insurance?” 

He lets out an amused huff “Yours doesn't?” 

“I never asked,” you shrug, taking the handles and looking forward again, leaning in slightly so now he's not that close to you but he feels you everywhere still “Just making sure in case I break you.” 

When you start driving him, handling the Bonneville in a way he never would even with the years of experience ahead of him, he wants to tell you that he wouldn't mind that. 

In fact, he finds himself wanting it. 

As he holds tight to your waist, he finds himself on the verge of telling you to break him apart piece by piece so he can do the same with you. Explore you, not physically, but in the way it truly matters. 

He wants to know your soul, he wants to understand the reason he feels attached to you after a brief meeting and little more. 

You lean back to rest your back a little at a stop sign and he suddenly doesn't care if the way he squishes your waist for a few seconds gives his intentions away. He has your number, he's going to make a move eventually. 

What he does care about is the way you don't tense up and just lean into his body a little more before resuming the task of getting both of you wherever you're going

This? The way he feels so free as you move through the highway, make your way in between the cars at stop signs and the wind hitting his arms? This is the grasp at his youth he's been waiting for. Even if it's just for the night. 

Even if it's over too soon for his liking. 

You stop in front of a house that looks empty. He wonders if it's yours for a second, but then again he's going to find out any minute soon. 

“That wasn't too bad, was it?” 

Getting down from his Bonneville, you take your helmet off and offer him your hand. He slides up his helmet so you can see his face, about to reply, but you beat him to it “Thank you so much for the ride that I technically gave myself, Park Seonghwa, it was a pleasure to meet you.” 

Why are you saying goodbye like you're not planning on seeing him ever again? 

Suddenly, he's planning on ways to mess up his bike again just to get an excuse to see you again. 

No. 

He has to be braver than that. 

Taking your hand, he pulls you in a little bit and you let out a surprised noise that looks like it embarrasses you. 

Your cheeks turn red under the streetlight and he thinks you look beautiful like that. 

“Y/N,” he starts in a whisper, gathering his courage up “Would you like to—” 

“Y/N.” A voice interrupts him and your eyes widen in panic while you look at him, slowly turning your head to the person as he does the same. 

Not before he notices how the pretty blush and all colors drain from your face. 

A guy, with blonde shaggy hair and tattoos covering his neck and hands is standing on the sidewalk with a grocery store bag and a weird look on his face. Beside him, a girl who’s smile fades away when she seems to recognize you scoffs. 

The guy smiles and Seonghwa wonders why you don't say anything back, your grasp on his hand tightening before letting go. 

“There you are, your dad said—” 

“Ghost?” 

Seonghwa doesn't like the way your voice shakes when you say the nickname he's grown used to in such a short amount of time. 

“Yes?” 

You don't bother putting the helmet back on, simply dropping it to the ground and turning back at him “I trust you to ride this bike now, yeah?” 

He doesn't have to be told twice. Making space for you again, you hop on and hug his waste. He slides his helmet back on. 

The guy takes a few steps but Seonghwa stops him with the sound of him revving his Bonneville “Come on, Y/N…” Is what he says when he starts to drive off, accelerating just a little bit before the houses start fading and the busy highway welcomes you both. 

Deokhee has some nerve. 

The fact that he does boils your bloodstream and you wish you could say that the warm sensation spreading through your body is caused by the guy who you're currently holding to. 

Seonghwa has checked in with you once and, after confirming you were okay to keep going, he has held your gloved hands at every red light and stop sign. 

You have no idea where you're going, but you're sure you can't go home and deal with this alone for now. He can't take you home, either (he doesn't know the address) but even if he could, you wouldn't let him. 

The nameless girl that was with Deokhee is the same girl he cheated with. A girl who, by judging her expression, probably knew about you. 

Mind going as fast as the Boneville, you ask yourself how many times she made fun of you for grasping a fantasy, a make-believe story with her now boyfriend. 

What did you lack that she obviously has? What prompted him to hurt you this badly? 

Is he stupid enough to not realize that the sight of them together would tear you apart all over again? 

The scene replays in your head again, after all these years of trying to get over it: Him, holding your hand and telling you how amazing you were to him but that, in all honesty, he didn't see himself going out with someone like you. 

You were too much, too proud, too loud. 

Which doesn't make any fucking sense because although you never held back a jab or a sarcastic comment if needed, you knew the time and place to speak your mind. 

It also didn't make any fucking sense because he knew you would keep his little secret from your father and your brother and, in consequence, keep the relationship you both had and the cowardly way it ended from his family as well. 

You were too much, composed of many flaws and adorned with rough and burnt edges, but you would never in a million years tarnish the happiness of the people who love you because of a rookie mistake. 

Falling in love with Deokhee was a rookie, horrible mistake. 

Falling in love in general? You doubt it. 

Because the way Seonghwa takes his time to slow down the bike on a lookout you were too distracted to notice you were climbing up to, pulls it to a full stop and then immediately reaches for your hands again, makes you believe there's good people out there after all. 

He took you away without asking any questions and you're suddenly welcomed with the same grateful feeling you have towards your family. 

Had you stayed there, you're not so sure you would've kept your words to yourself anymore. Your pain, your anger. 

Getting down from the bike, Seonghwa takes his helmet off and drops it in front of you, on the seat, before leaning in searching for your glossy eyes. 

You can see him hesitate through the fog your tears form and you don't let them drop just yet. You're angry, but there's no way you would let Deokhee make you cry again in this lifetime. 

You should get down from the bike, but it doesn't move under your weight even if you readjust your position on the seat and you fear that, if you do, you would only plop down into the ground and let it swallow you whole. 

You should say something, too. Thank him, probably, but the tall man lets out a breath before opening his arms and pointing at the view. Gladly, you take the opportunity to take in your surroundings and wipe your eyes with the back of your hand. 

“Didn't know where else to take you, so I brought you to my breaking point.” 

“Hm?” frowning a bit, you peel your eyes from the city lights to him “Your breaking point?”

“Yeah, that's what I call it,” he smiles and you do too, halfheartedly “Here's where I come to break down and let everything out. There's a playground back there too,” he points behind him and you scoff, amused “If you want to climb up somewhere and scream. The neighbors don't mind it.” 

“I take that as a I've done it before.” 

“Once or twice,” he shrugs “It's good for the soul.” 

“God,” you cover your face with your hands “I'm so embarrassed you had to see me like that.” 

“Like what? You didn't do anything.” 

“Running away and acting all weak in front of…” you fake gag, but it's kind of real “Some guy.” 

A bit of silence passes in between you and your savior. 

And then Seonghwa laughs so hard you're forced to uncover your face and stare at him in disbelief “I'm serious! That's like… top one most embarrassing thing I've ever done.” 

His laugh comes to a stop and he doesn't step closer even if you want him to, just puts his hands in the pockets of his pants and looks at you for what it feels like forever. 

You don't mind it one bit. 

“I've known you for a day, Y/N, but even I can tell that's not the most embarrassing thing you've done.” 

Sulking, you turn to the beautiful view one more time and pout like a child. You want to tell him he's right, but your pride doesn't really allow it just yet. 

It's quiet for a minute or two. You move around, throw your leg over the Bonneville and sit on top of it as you stare at the city. You feel Seonghwa move around, pace behind you until he finally reaches around and he takes a few steps before stopping on the railing separating the street from the hill. 

He's looking in your direction instead of the view. You realize he's giving you space to sulk, to take in everything without pestering you with questions about why the hell you both just bolted instead of facing the situation. 

Your gratitude towards him rises a bit more. 

So your word vomit is justified, you think, because you don't want to leave him in the dark any longer. 

The fantasy you indulged yourself in earlier might just grow into a reality you have to embrace, a reality you want to embrace. 

“He's my ex-something and the girl he was with is the one he chose over me. I was supposed to have dinner with them— Well, no, not really,” you sigh, looking at Seonghwa who, in the deem light, just nods and waits for you to continue “He's my dad’s best friend's son and we have dinner with them every Tuesday. Their family, I mean. Deokhee… He never shows up,” you shrug “And when he does, he's alone and it's towards the end of it all so I never get to see him that long. But this?” you shake your head, disappointment written all over your face “I never thought he would do this to me.”

Finally getting off the bike, you walk slowly towards the railing as well and feel Seonghwa's eyes follow you as you do “He cheated on me with her, for Christ sake.” You whisper once the metal of the railing stops your step. 

“How long ago?” 

“Does it matter?” 

“No,” from the corner of your eye, you see how he shakes his head and leans in slightly “I'm wondering because if I was your dad or your brother or your friend, I would've done something to, at least, ensure something like this never happens to you.” 

“Yeah, about that…” A bitter chuckle abandons you and you shrug one more time “They don't really know what happened between us— They don't know something happened in the first place,” ashamed, once again, you turn to him “He asked me to not tell anyone when we started… Ack, whatever, it doesn't really matter.” 

“It does if it's affecting you,” he insists “It does if you go pale at the sight of him, Y/N. Did he do—” 

“No,” you cut him off, the corners of your lips lifting a bit “He didn't do anything weird besides breaking my heart.” 

“Good.” 

“I would've killed him if he did, by the way.” 

“As you should,” he returns right away and finally, for the first time in the twenty minutes it took both of you to get there, you laugh sincerely. That prompts a smile on his lips “Good to know he's an idiot but not that type of idiot.” 

Huffing, you turn to the city before you again “The only idiot in this situation is me.” 

“For loving someone? Y/N,” his hand reaches your shoulder and you close your eyes in defeat, surrendering your heart to the weird emotion it brings you “He cheated on you. He's the idiot, the dumbass, the—” 

Laughing again, his rant comes to an end and you open your eyes to find him staring at you in delight “Park Seonghwa,” you start, putting a hand over his on your shoulder “You, sir, don't know me.” 

The reminder does nothing to stop him from looking at you with stars in his eyes “I'm a great judge of character, Y/N.” 

“And if you're wrong?” 

“Then let me be wrong,” he shortens the distance a bit, the warmth on your shoulder leaving as he lowers both of your hands, not letting go “But let me get to know you first.” 

The emotion grows bigger, it swirls around your heart and spreads around your body in a way you never felt. It feels good and you hate to compare it to what you felt for Deokhee but where it once was filled with regrets and doubts and a need to hold on tight to whatever that guy made you feel now sits something that you can only describe as excitement and thrill. 

Peaceful, too. 

It steals your breath in a beautiful way. 

Squeezing his hand a little, you inhale slowly and let go of the air when you speak “I don't really do dates, Ghost.” 

“I didn't ask you on a date,” he counters immediately and your cheeks darken “I asked if I could get to know you. We don't have to go on dates, talking to you is enough.” 

“O-oh, I… I thought—” 

He seems to get it right away because he takes another step, your arm pressed to his by now, your hands still tangled in the middle “I one hundred percent meant it that way,” he assures you, chuckling a bit “But I don't really do dates either. Asking you out to a restaurant or a movie or whatever it is people do on dates doesn't really suit me.” 

“How so?” 

“There's this… Weird intention laced into it, into the prospect of a date that I don't particularly enjoy. I want to get to know people and see where it takes us without pressuring ourselves into anything romantic or sexual.” Your heart picks up at that. Not at the image it paints, but at his explanation as a whole. 

It shows he might be interested in you beyond something physical and it's a beautiful thing to note when, all your life, you have felt like people only wanted you for one thing and one thing only. 

You intend to tell him just that but the way he's looking at you makes you forget everything else. Brown eyes scan every inch of your face and stop at your lips for a second. 

Now your heart beats for a different reason. 

“No matter… How bad I want to kiss you, though.” 

Words fall short. They do when for the first time in a long time you entertain the possibility of letting yourself want to kiss someone else, too. 

Leaning in and straightening your back fully to give you the possibility of almost standing face to face with him, you silently communicate your desire. 

It's not enough. He's too respectful. 

Fuck, you like him a lot already. 

“If you want to kiss me then just kiss me…” you whisper, teasing smile in full display “Dummy.” 

He fakes a gasp at your jab as he leans in, his pretty nose bumping into yours for a second and making you giggle, part your lips and close your eyes while buzzing with expectation. 

The sky has other plans, though. It roars above you and you both look up. 

It's been cloudy, a couple of days of unusual humidity throwing off everyone but you guess the steam gathered up in the clouds just in time to knock some sense of reality into you. 

Or pushing you further into the craziness of this one day alone. 

Seonghwa groans a little and then a phone starts ringing in someone's pocket. 

Not yours, you made sure to hit the not disturb button as soon as you got ahold of it. 

You should probably tell your brother you're okay. 

But Seonghwa is still close to you, his lips a breath away from yours, so you put it aside when he shows no intention of picking up his call either. 

The tension builds up again, both of you ignoring the thunderstorm approaching and everything else. 

There's many things from today you're not going to be able to explain any time soon, the magnetic pull Seonghwa had on you the first time you laid eyes on him is one of them, the freedom you touch with your fingertips when your mind is finally off your duty, off your family… 

It's so dangerous you quickly become addicted to the recklessness of it all. 

And then his phone starts ringing again, so you welcome the reality that washes over you with a sour face and pout on your lips. 

“The universe must be against us being a thing, huh?” You whisper and he clicks his tongue in disapproval, resting his forehead on yours for a second before pulling away completely, pulling out his phone from his pocket. 

“I don't think the universe has much to do with this one, dear,” he frowns and misses the way you flush at the sudden nickname. You swear on your life, normally you would be pretty disgusted at the endearment. Now? You want him to call you that again “I should take this and we should probably go somewhere else. There's not much to cover us up if it starts raining.” 

“Sure, uh…” You fish your phone from your pocket as well, grimacing when you look at the missed calls and texts “I have to make a call, too.” 

He seems to understand immediately “Go right ahead.” 

Putting even more distance in between both of you, you faintly hear a what's going on from Seonghwa and then tap your screen to return your brother's call. 

He picks up right away. 

“Are you okay?!” 

His tone forces your eyes closed. Rushed, you picture him in the backyard with a cigarette in between his fingers, trying to get ahold of himself without worrying everyone else too much “Yeah, I'm okay. I'm with a friend and—” 

“Then why don't you pick up the fucking phone?!” 

“Calm down,” taking in a breath and letting it out, you hear him do the same before continuing “Is there a way I can explain all of this to you tomorrow? I'm fine, Deokhee is a dick and I don't ever want to see him so I ran away like a—” 

“What did he do?” 

“No, nothing now, it's just… Listen, I'll explain tomorrow, alright? I'm staying with my friend tonight and everything will make sense tomorrow. It's really dumb, like… Teenage drama dumb,” you sigh, hoping that the minimal information you're giving him can help him figure it out “Just tell dad that I'm fine and if he asks I'm with a friend who is a girl and she's staying over at my place because there was a… Boy emergency or whatever.” 

“Are you with—” what seems to click is something else and your brother gasps “Y/N!” 

“Can you help out this time?”

The silence on the line seems to extend forever and guilt licks your throat, giving you the feeling that it's about to close up. 

You want to grasp what you felt a minute ago again, the freedom of this, of doing too much, of unnecessarily putting Christian through it because he already did so much for you growing up. 

Just tonight, at least, you owe yourself the feeling of not proving your place in your own family. 

But the silence hurts and you wonder if you could ever, truly, be free from it. 

“You owe me an explanation. Take care and text me goodnight at least, yeah?” 

“Okay,” you whisper back “Thank you, Ian.” 

“Yeah, yeah. I love you, kid.” 

His words fill your eyes with tears again and you don't get to reciprocate them before he hangs up. You know he knows, but it still hurts when you remember how unlovable you felt before you met him as a child.

It hurts when you remember that you allowed Deokhee to make that feeling return. 

It hurts. It hurts. It hurts. 

And the more it hurts, the more the sky rumbles and you fear that, if you break down here and now, it would not only embarrass you in front of Seonghwa but also strand him on this hill with you. 

It doesn't matter that he calls this his breaking point, it's not yours to use. 

So again, your tears stay at bay and when you turn around you catch Seonghwa looking at you with an unreadable expression on his face. 

He wants to hug you, his body language gives him away as soon as he steps closer to you but a storm is about to soak through your clothes any second, so you pass him and grab his hand to pull him to his bike in the process. 

When his fingers intertwine with yours, you know he understands. He doesn't make any questions, he doesn't press any information out of you and just allows you to climb his motorcycle. 

“We need to leave.” 

“Where do you want to go?” he asks, getting on the bike as well and goes in for his helmet but your words stop him. 

“Do you want to stay the night with me?” 

Turning his head, he blinks at you a few times and you smile a little before the curve fades away. 

“I have my own place, we can order something in and just talk. Seonghwa, you…” biting the inside of your cheek, you try to approach this the right way “I don't expect this to go anywhere but can't you… Do you feel it too?” 

He stays silent and you fear you might've taken it too far. But it doesn't really matter. Willing to take the risk, you take his hand on yours again and hold it close to your heart. 

The sky roars again in response. 

And you catch when his breath hitches because of it, too. 

“Do you feel it, Seonghwa?” 

A bit passes and then some, his eyes searching for something in yours and then dropping to where your heart beats again.

“What's your address?”

It's already raining by the time you both get into your building’s garage and park his Bonneville. 

The entire ride was a bit long. It had you resting your head on his back while his fingers tapped against yours with impatience. 

But when you make it to the safe space that is the elevator, clothes showing the evidence of the droplets falling from the sky and all, you finally get to breathe. 

Until Seonghwa steals that breath away again. 

He stares at you through the mirror, steps closer until he can take your face with his hands and swipes under your eyes where the makeup has run a little. 

“Ghost…” 

‘I didn't answer before,” he murmurs and wet his lips with his tongue. You can't help but stare at them, the moment somehow more intimate now, under the fluorescent glow of the elevator, than with the city lights and lighting above you “But I do feel it. I stand on what I said before, though.” 

“No dating?” 

He chuckles “No, not that,” shaking his head, he steps away when the elevator gets to your floor “I want to get to know you either way.” 

“Ah. That,” you feel silly for assuming he didn't want to date you, but given your history you're not sure you can blame yourself too much “Well, you're about to see my cave, so we're both halfway there.” 

As soon as you open the door and turn on the light, you can see in his face that he sees what you mean. 

It's a one bedroom apartment that doesn't leave too much to the imagination. Your bedroom’s door is opened, the bathroom door is closed and the kitchen is an American style one that's separated from the living space by a small counter you can barely fit your mail on. 

There's a lot of old furniture that you remodeled, painted over the cracks and stuffed where you needed the most. Your fridge is also old, the couch is somehow the only modern looking item in the living room and it stands out a bit because its material is not as worn out as everything else. 

There's posters on the walls, unframed and placed randomly because, here, you don't have to be put together. The only people who come over are your brother and your dad, so it's okay. 

It's not even an old building, but your apartment makes it look like one. 

“Hope you don't mind the mess, Grandpa.” 

“Oh, I'm not Ghost anymore?” He asks with a breathy laugh, taking his shoes off as you place yours by the entrance and shrugging his jacket off too “It's not messy, it's… Kind of like the shop, really.” 

Mirroring his actions, you take off the leather jacket and welcome the warmth of your apartment “Greasy?” 

“Cool,” he corrects and you walk through your space picking up a few things from the floor and putting them by the living room table “Is it yours, by the way?” 

“The shop?” he nods and you walk to your fridge to fetch you both some water bottles “It's my dads. Why do you ask?” 

“You seemed to own the place, with the way you walked around it,” shrugging, he takes a seat on your couch as he takes in the space “I just wondered…” 

Walking in front of him on purpose, because you could've easily rounded the table and sat at the opposite edge of the couch, you sit right beside him and offer him a water bottle that he takes with a whispered thanks “You wondered…” 

“A lot of stuff, actually,” he admits and you smile “Like your age, for example. Your last name, how did you end up working as a mechanic, if you were studying something, if you…” he pauses and turns to the side, resting his shoulder on the couch “If you liked me the way I liked you.” 

Choking on the water you're gulping down, it's very evident you didn't think he was about to go down that lane again. 

So directly, too. 

He laughs, leaning in and wiping your chin with a familiarity that has you even more breathless than his confession. No, scratch that, it's all of it. All of him. 

“Don't make me get on that bike again tonight, dear.” 

That goddamn endearment again. You might risk it all and kiss him, chin wet and all. 

“Whatever for?”

“You clearly almost choked to death,” he exaggerates, probably an excuse to stay that close to you longer than he needs to “And it was my fault, too.” 

Smiling and shaking your head, you push him a bit until he falls back into his previous position, smugness tugging at his lips in a way that has your insides jolting up with excitement “I do like you, Ghost.” 

“I know that now, but earlier I did wonder.” 

“Wondering is such a dangerous thing, isn't it?” 

His smile settles with a softness that melts you, your hand back in his with ease “Not necessarily.”

Squeezing his hand in unspoken agreement, you nod and then try to remember the topic of conversation before… Well, before he distracted you. 

“Well, you were kind of right with your assumptions then. It's not my shop, but I grew up in it,” you shrug, letting go of his hand to grab your phone “We should probably wait to order something.” 

“Yeah, until the monsoon dies down,” he says, looking outside your window that does little to conceal the thunderstorm outside “You grew up fixing bikes?” 

“Cars,” you correct with a nod, connecting your phone to the speaker that lies under your tv “Is my day to day playlist alright?” 

“Yup,” he crosses his legs on the couch and you see from the corner of your eye how his follow your actions, heat rushing to your cheeks at how attentive he is “Did you always want to be a mechanic?” 

The question takes you by surprise, but you cover it up as you set the volume to the perfect percentage to let you two have a proper conversation without raising your voices “Kind of. It's all I'm good at, really,” you shrug “Also, my dad’s wife looked very cool in pictures growing up and I wanted to be just like her, so.”

“Your mom?” you shake your head and he frowns “Your stepmom?” 

“No, uh…” clearing your throat, you get ready to reveal a piece of you that you rarely share with other people, even if it's obvious to everyone else “I'm adopted. Me and my brother we, mmm, we used to live in this sort of… Group house, I guess, and dad just picked us one day,” word vomiting again, once that you open the dam you don't know how to stop “I mean, he's not… We're not blood related, either, he just brought me along like when you adopt a dog at a shelter and they give you their favorite blanket, you know?” 

Seonghwa is full on frowning at that and you think that, for the sake of just agreeing with you, he's going to nod and let it go, but he doesn't “I don't think you're just something your brother brought along with him. Adopting two kids is a big decision, isn't it?” 

Reluctantly, you nod. 

“Well, there you go.” 

“I wouldn't be here if it weren't for him, though,” you shrug and sip on your water bottle again, gulping the liquid to send that lump on your throat down “But it doesn't really matter because it was a long time ago and now they're both stuck with me.” 

He shakes his head but laughs a little at your sudden shift and, this time, he does let it go. 

But you don't. 

“Thank you, by the way.” 

He smiles, a little confused “For what?” 

“Helping me when I needed you to. We don't really know each other and yet…” 

“It feels like I know you, though.” 

Sharing the sentiment, you nod “I know, it's weird but, uhm… You didn't need to do what you did for me tonight. You even took me to your breaking point!” you let out a puff of air, making it a bigger deal than what it sounds. It's a bigger deal for you, anyway “And then drove me all the way here. That's a lot.” 

“It's not much. It was my fault, really,” he shrugs and shakes his head at the confused look you give him “I kind of… Asked the universe for an excuse to stay with you, so…” 

“Ah, so it was your fault Deokhee showed up,” the lighthearted joke lands the way you intended because he laughs with a sound so beautiful it makes your heart pick up “Got it.” 

“Do you feel better? I mean, after seeing him, are you feeling better?” 

“Not really, it sucks,” you say with a bitter laugh “But I hold grudges like that. It's not…” you raise your hands in self defense suddenly “I don't want him like that anymore, it's just that I can't help but…”  

“I understand,” he whispers and you let out a sigh again, grateful that he interrupted your rambling “People believe that forgive and forget is the way to go when you're resenting someone but human beings don't really work like that, hm?” 

“Yeah…” 

Staring at him, that weird emotion that you felt at the top of the hill comes back. That dangerous warmth that makes you want to take his hand in yours and place your lips at the back of it with a familiarity you haven't really earned yet. 

So when you catch him staring at you the same way, you change the subject. 

“What do you do?” eyebrow raising, you eye him suspiciously and that makes him giggle “Meetings all day, past normal shift hours…”

“I renovate spaces, Y/N,” he laughs again “You made it sound like I work with the mafia.” 

“Do you?” 

“No. I have a buddy that does, though.” 

“Oh, so I was kind of right then?” 

“Yeah, yeah…” you both laugh again and then he looks around your living space like he did when you two first got in “You were right about the whole getting to know you just by looking at your apartment.” 

“I know, it says a lot about a person.” 

“It does!” He's excited now, sitting straighter and turning ever so slightly, your knees bumping now “There's only a few people that I trust who have those… Beige, white and black houses or apartments and that's only because I got to know them before I saw where they live.” 

“So, you have rich friends?” 

He stops and thinks for a second “Yeah, they all have a lot of money. I mean, the people I'm talking about, not my friends,” you raise your eyebrow again and he chuckles “Alright, I only have one rich friend. The rest of them are broke musicians and college students. He was actually the one who called earlier and, uhm…” 

“Interrupted us?” You offer, smiling. 

His cheeks gain a little color, maybe from the memory “Y-yeah.” 

“Everything's okay?” 

“Yes! Yeah, he wanted me to go pick him up from something but I told him I couldn't because, well—” 

“You were with me.” 

“Mhm,” you see him gulp and the mood shifts a little bit again. His face falls down as he eyes your parted lips, leaning in again ever so slightly, like he's not really thinking it through “Couldn't leave you stranded and he has a chauffeur.” 

Unconsciously, you start leaning in a bit too.

“Do you like it?” 

“Yes… D-do I like what?”

You chuckle and he breathes out a laugh, too “Renovating spaces…” 

Pressing his hands into the fabric on the couch, at your sides, he invades your space a little more now “I do… Do you like fixing cars?” 

Nodding, your nose is a whisper away from his now “I do…” 

He breathes and it lands right on your mouth, making you pant as well. 

“That's good.” 

“Mhm.” 

Eyes closing, your lips tremble a little as you wait for him to close the distance. 

“You're so fucking pretty—” 

You close the distance instead, pressing your mouth into his and letting the tension deflate your posture because you're finally tasting him. 

Your little fantasy is not a fantasy anymore. 

And it feels so fucking good. It feels good to have someone you desire, so suddenly, so unexpectedly, reciprocate your emotions and pull you closer to make acquaintance with your taste as well. 

Seonghwa makes a noise you want to engrave into your brain the second you grab his shirt and pull him to you as well. And then you move. 

The couch is stuffy, your bed is a mess and the cold from the thunderstorm makes its way to your living room even if you feel your entire body lit up from the swipe of his tongue against yours. 

So you stand up. 

You give him a teasing smile when his mouth chases after yours once you pull away “Where are you going?” 

“Another thing you should know about me,” you start, breathy, your thumb swiping your bottom lip on instinct and his eyes follow the motions “Is that I have very noisy neighbors. The woman in that apartment over there,” you point at the window right in front of yours, the building separated by the street but still close enough to tell everything that goes inside your neighbors apartment if you wanted to “Once made a complaint against me because I walked out in my underwear one time.” 

“Is she blind or bitter or something?” he asks, amused by your sudden storytelling, chest heaving as you pull your curtains closed “Or both?” 

“She's old,” you tell him, turning around “And you haven't seen me in my underwear to make that a point, Ghost.” 

“Yet,” he smirks slyly and you blush at the implication. Seonghwa reaches for you as you pass in front of him again and slip right through his fingers a second time “Now where are you going?” 

He sounds whiny. 

You like that. 

“Another thing you should know about me,” walking to the door and turning off the big light, the living room goes dark except for the lighting that illuminates it as you're making your way back to him, getting on your knees on the couch and reaching behind him to turn on a lamp that doesn't do much but, this way, at least you can see each other “Is that I don't invest in new shit. Can't afford it, so those curtains are useless during the day… And when the lights are turned on.” 

“You don't want people to gossip about you kissing a hot guy?” 

“Wow,” his cockiness is clearly a joke but you won't let the opportunity of making fun of him go “Is the hot guy in the room with us?”  

He beams at you. 

“Oh, shut up, Y/N.” 

Humming and feeling a lot more comfortable now that you know that, in fact, the spotlight won't be on you when you keep kissing his lips raw as you intend to, you loop your index finger in the collar of his shirt and tug with minimal force at it. 

He acts like you put a lot of strength while doing it, his lips a breath from yours again as a consequence.  

You're about to let out a witty remark, something to keep the teasing and flirting going but then his eyes actually light up like the sky when the song playing on the speaker changes. 

“That's what you were humming yesterday!” His hands fall to your waist and you all but get whiplashed at the quick change in attitude. 

He looked like he was about to risk it all a second ago and now he's letting his back fall into the couch and taking you with him. 

“Huh?”

“I didn't see anyone when I came into the shop yesterday and then I heard you humming this song.” 

“Oh,” you laugh, braising yourself on your forearms as he moves his hands up your back “Is one of my favorite songs by them.” 

“By who?”

Eyes wide as saucers, you gape at him in disbelief “Kiss?” 

“I don't know them like that!” 

“You don't know this?” he giggles under your scrutinizing gaze and you follow, still in disbelief. You don't really know what possesses you, but you start singing along to the lyrics “I was made for lovin’ you, baby. You were made for lovin’ me.” 

Seonghwa's laughter dies down at that and you notice it too: How the words somehow seem fitting even though you is day two of knowing him. 

The way his heart beats under the palm you place right above it, on his chest, feels intoxicating. 

So you descend again, your front colliding with his and your mouth grazing his beautiful one as you sing the song to him. 

“And I can't get enough of you baby, can you get enough of me?” 

“Fuck…” 

You laugh “That's not really how it goe—” 

His tongue probing your lips open shuts you up for good. 

Seonghwa's hands hold you close, tracing the curve on your back slowly with his thumbs until he finds that spot where your shirt rode up a little, goosebumps on your skin letting him know what he provokes on you. 

There's never been a point in time where you let yourself wonder if you're moving too fast. 

For you, someone who had to take every chance they got in life to get something, out of fear the opportunity wouldn't show up again, this thing you got with Seonghwa feels like it's going at the right pace. 

You both like each other, that much is clear. 

Nothing dramatic has really happened to bond you two together, but it feels like it has. 

Like you're bonded. 

Like it was fated, somehow. 

Like his motorcycle had to break down and he had to walk into the shop when you were the only one there to assist him. 

Like he had to see you breakdown, take you away from the despair Deokhee brings to your soul, in order for you to finally let go and move on to greater things. 

And there's nothing greater than feeling his hand travel down and absentmindedly grab your ass, a noise of satisfaction slipping through your lips and landing on his at the feeling. 

“I'm so—” 

“I liked it,” your smile blends with his as you peck his lips and he does it again, gaining a pleased hum from you “Come here, Ghost.” 

“Where?” 

Disentangling your limbs from his, you follow your original plan and slip from the couch to the floor, your knees hitting the soft carpet you have under the coffee table you're grateful is not that in the way.

Seonghwa sits on the couch again, opening his legs to accommodate the new position you're in and you see the image get to him before the suggestion hits your head. 

You see him gulp when you lick your lips and then it's your turn to gulp, trying to understand if this is something he wants as much as you want it.

Because suddenly you want it. You want it so much. 

It doesn't take much to gather up the courage to touch him, his thighs inviting you to caress them with your nails, teasing, testing him “Is this okay?” 

“Yeah,” he breathes out, hooded eyes and a soft, whiny, trembling tone making fidget on your knees “More than okay.” 

It makes you smile. But there's things to clear up before you go any further. 

“I don't want you to think I brought you to my house just to get on my knees in front of you, Seonghwa.” 

“I don't… I w-would never think that,” you nod and he releases a shuddering breath “I don't want you to think that this is all I want from you either, Y/N.” 

“I don't think that,” you whisper “but thank you for making it clear.” 

“Mhm, I… Oh.” He stops when your touch trails higher and you take your hands away. 

“You wanted to say something else?” 

“N-no.” 

Squinting your eyes at him, you press “You sure?” 

“I was going to say that I want you… S-so please touch me, please.” 

Who would've thought that a man begging would turn you on so, so much? 

You catch on to it immediately. Lowering your hands again, this time around his calves, you pull him a little so he can sit on the edge of the worn out couch. 

He follows suit. 

“You want me to touch you?” you murmur and he nods “Where?”

He closes his eyes, blush beautifully creeping up his neck “Y/N…” 

“You asked me to touch you, but I already was…” you say, like it's the most obvious thing ever “So where do you want to be touched, hm?” 

Straightening your spine and angling yourself upwards, your nose hovers just below his chin. Hands starting to go up again, you hear his breath hitched when your palm grabs into the fabric of his pants before letting it go, the sound of it hitting the skin under making you and him release a noise. 

“How do you want to be touched?” 

Looking down, Seonghwa's mouth barely brushes your nose when he says “So it's going to be like this?” 

“It's working for you,” you whisper back, the pad of your fingers pressing on his inner thighs and, when you look down, the tent in his pants curves your lips with pride that shows when you turn to him again “Isn't it?” 

Pupils blown, he bites down on his lip and you see, for a slight second, a switch in his demeanor that makes you want to drop the teasing just to ask him to take you right there, on the floor, on the couch, wherever he wants to. 

But, as soon as your fingernails trace the outline of his cock, he switches back “P-please...” 

He doesn't have to beg you anymore. 

Desperate to have him squirming under your touch, you push a little with your thumbs and he whines, a sweet sound you can't treasure as long as you want to because hand grabs your neck and his mouth crushes yours in want. 

In a few seconds, the button of his pants is off and the fabric is pooling at his ankles. You help him out of them, his mouth never leaving yours except when you two break apart to pass sweet moans in between kisses and barely there bites. 

Boxers succumbing to the same fate as his pants, you get him needy and panting into your open mouth as you finally take him fully into your hand. 

Pumping one and then twice, you finally pull away to look at him and the sight that welcomes you is beautiful, big and oozing at the tip. 

Eyes connecting with Seonghwa’s again, you make sure he's looking at you before gathering spit and letting it fall into your hand. 

He moans. 

And then he moans a little more when you start working his length, butt connecting to the carpet once again to give him attention fully. 

It feels invigorating, the control he gives you makes you float into an intimate space you never had the opportunity to explore before and that just adds up to the list of things you're grateful for. 

You take in his reactions, the way he's having a hard time keeping his mouth shut when you get close to the tip and tease it before going back down, the way his breath catches in his throat when you lean in and blow some air on it before letting yourself have a taste of him. 

Licking around the tip and eyeing him as you do so, you get to catch him throw his head back in bliss. Then, you indulge both of you a little bit more: hollowing your cheeks, you move forward to take him in your mouth. 

And then you moan around him at the feeling and he shivers under the palm you placed on his knee to keep steady as you suck him off. 

“Your mouth feels so fucking good, dear,” he encourages and you bat your eyelashes at him teasingly, making him chuckle before whining again. Tangling his fingers on your head to guide you to the right speed, he closes his eyes and curses under his breath “So fucking good.” 

It only makes you want to hear him again. So you do your best to stay on him, breathing through your nose and continuing your ministrations as he moans above you, filling your living room with sounds you want to plaster across the walls, encapsulate in a bottle to hear them again when he's not with you. 

You take him deeper and his grasp on your head tenses before you release him with a lewd sound you didn't really intend to make. 

Breathing hard, you let out a whine when he tilts your head back. He looks at you with indescribable desire, want and a little smile that prones yours. 

“You have no idea,” he starts, leaning in to take you mouth with his again, tongue swiping at the saliva that gathered under your bottom lip “How bad I want to ruin you now.” 

Oh, so maybe he's not as submissive as you thought. You should've guessed it, the slight switch and the little glint earlier would've hinted at his true intimate nature if you weren't so busy trying to get the act up. 

“Only if you want to, of course.” 

And yet, he's such a fucking gentleman. You can practically feel yourself getting wetter at his words. 

Your whisper is sweet, a confirmation on what you want and what he obviously wants to hear “Come here, Ghost.” 

You make space for him on the floor and he doesn't question why the both of you are not on the way to your bed right now. 

He seems to like it, even, so you giggle into his mouth at his eagerness to lay you down on the soft carpet and hum appreciatively when his hands bypass your shirt and grab your bare waist to accommodate you both into a comfortable position. 

With his leg in between yours and his chest pressed against you, he kisses you until you're pliant, needy and janking him down to earn some sort of friction. 

Mouth descending down your cheek, into your jaw and then your neck, Seonghwa scatters kisses in the soft spots like he already mapped you out with his mouth. 

His hands touch you where you like, his knee bumps into your core to keep you there as he works his way through you like he had you like this before and it's addicting. 

It feels right. 

He mouths at the valley of your breasts and softly sinks his teeth into the flesh through your shirt and it makes you dizzy, letting out a moan that makes him smile. 

Touching him too, you give his back some attention before sinking your fingers on his silky hair and tugging at the strands. 

He kisses down, down, down until he reaches your belly and then bites you the same way he did seconds ago “Ghost…” 

“Say my name, Y/N.” 

“Hm?” 

“I love when you call me Ghost,” he starts, breathing hard and you watch his nose disappear under the fabric of your shirt, raising it a bit more when he moves to be eye to eye with you “but I want you to call my name if I'm making you feel good,” kissing the sense out of you for a few seconds, he talks against your mouth “Can you do that for me, dear?” 

“Yes,” you barely nod, opening your eyes to find his “Seonghwa.” 

The way you whisper his name, needy and teasingly at the same time, seems to wake something else in him. 

Because in a second, he's asking you to raise your body a little so he can take your shirt off. You help him with his and he moves to undo the clasp on your bra after asking for permission one more time and you shouldn't really find his insistent questioning of consent so hot but you do. 

He takes his time with you, exploring you with his mouth as you do your best to keep still under him. He kisses your chest, rounding your nipples with his tongue and taking them into his mouth after.

Lightning illuminates the room and electricity runs through you and settles into your core. 

“Seonghwa…” 

The sky roars when he gives your legs attention over the fabric of your pants, moans blending into the thunder and the sound of the raindrops against the window when he pulls back and raises your left leg to kiss a path from your ankle to your thigh. 

You buck your hips at the feeling, asking for more without really saying anything and he smiles before moving to your right leg and giving it the same amount of attention. 

“You want me to touch you?” He asks and you're about to call him out for being mean and clueless, but his smirk proves he's only teasing “Where do you want me to touch you, Y/N?” voice low and dripping in honey, he unbuttons your pants and you're not too fucked out yet to know he's returning the way you tortured him earlier “How do you want me to touch you?” 

Your pants end up meeting with his somewhere under the coffee table and you smile when he zeroes on the wet patch your arousal has formed on your underwear. 

And, unlike him, you're not actually humble in asking what you want “Don't you want to taste the mess you've made, Seonghwa?” 

When he eats you out, he makes sure to taste it real good. Open you up with his fingers, learn the right pace and pressure until heat pools on your lower abdomen and you're incoherently babbling praises under your breath. 

When you come undone on his tongue, you make sure to repeat his name like a mantra. Over and over again until he's sated with his meal and leaves the remnants of it in wet marks as he makes his way up to your mouth. 

Tasting yourself on his tongue is heaven. 

“Sound so pretty for me, you're so… Fuck, Y/N.” 

Taking him into your hand again, his dick twitches at the sudden attention it's getting and you explore the skin on his neck, lap at his collarbone and nuzzle against it because you just can't get enough. 

“I want you inside me, Seonghwa,” you whisper against his skin and you see him close his eyes when your other hand joins you on his chest, thumb against his nipple “Ruin me like you promised, hm?” 

He grabs your chin, eyes dark with passion and affection in a way you never want to forget “Your filthy mouth might be the death of me.” He whispers and you giggle, bratty.

“Good, I never want you to forget it,” you whisper back “I never want you to forget me.” 

“Never in a million years, dear.” 

Happy at his response, you kiss him and feel the warmth of his hand leaving you to try and grab his pants again. You giggle when he curses lowly, letting go of him so he can take a condom out of his wallet with a smile on his face. 

He looks back at you in the process, shaking his head in amusement at the way you're taking the tender pause and he's smiling when he rolls on the condom as well as when he lowers himself so he can kiss you senseless again. 

When Seonghwa enters you, the whiny mess he was when you first touched him makes its comeback and you welcome it as you sink your nails into the skin of his waist, accompanying his slow movements as he eases you open. 

Soon, you're a whiny mess too. He whispers sweet nothings into your ear and kisses your shoulder while you hug him tight to you and let yourself get lost in the buck of his hips and the way he slows downs to make the moment last, like you're not planning on keeping him in your life and making him see stars whenever he wants. 

When he picks up the pace, the living room is warmer than it was when you first came in and the cold from the storm outside it's forgotten as his sweaty forehead rests on yours and his hips snap into yours with vigor.

“That’s it, dear. God, you feel so good…” 

Ruin you he does. Because this time, as he flicks your clit with his thumb and you come, it solidifies the fact that there's no one else you want. 

Is it crazy and a little rushed because you just met him? Yes. 

Do you give a damn? No. No you fucking dont. 

He ruins you for good and for everyone else, as well. 

“Seonghwa! Fuck, fuck, don't stop.” You beg, overstimulated and hips aching, but wanting him to reach his high so badly none of that matters. 

When his hips stutter, you take his ass with your hands and keep him in place, buried deep inside of you and walls pulsing around him as he comes with a beautiful cry and a rasp of your name in his throat. 

Panting, you take the opportunity to kiss his face as he comes down, nose slowly caressing his with affection and gratefulness and emotion you can't express because it's not the time yet. 

“God, Y/N.” He breathes out with a chuckle and you reciprocate it, kissing his mouth once more before deflating against the soft carpet under you. 

“I know,” you look at him, at his fucked out expression and the cute way he kisses the hand you use to wipe the sweat out of his face makes you feel giddy and in love, even if you know you're aren't in love with him yet “God bless the fucking thunderstorm.” 

Laughing, he nods in agreement “God bless the fucking thunderstorm.” 

He kisses you again and then pulls out, making a quick work on the condom and asking for the bathroom so he can dispose of it before making his way back to you. 

When he does, you're already sitting down, still naked, but sipping at your forgotten water bottle. Sitting down next to you, he places a kiss on top of your head.

The carpet is definitely going to use some cleaning after tonight, but that's okay. 

There's a bit of comfortable silence as you both recover from the amazing sex you just had. He takes a sip of your water bottle as well and then there's another thunder that shakes your window and all, making you both jump a little. 

Seonghwa “Do you… Mind if I stay over?” 

You snort “I wasn't planning on letting you go anywhere, Ghost.” 

He smiles, getting close to your face again “Even if it stops raining?” 

You nod, pecking his lips “Even if I have to go and clean up my room just for you.” 

“Oh, wow,” he whistles loud and you push him in feign annoyance, looking around for your underwear “You like me, like me.” 

“Shut the fuck up!” 

He attempts to hug you but you push him away again and stand up, making a quick job of putting your panties back on “Say that you like me and I'll let you kidnap me if you want.” 

“That's not how kidnapping works, idiot.” 

He gets up as well, taking his underwear and putting it on as he follows you around your apartment. 

You quicken your step, but he catches you right as you enter the mess in your bedroom. He hugs you tight, you back against his bare chest and his chin on your shoulder a second later “I'll honestly let you keep me even if you say you hate me, Y/N.”

Is sweet and it should make you cringe but you all but melt against his touch. There's no real need to tell him you like him when you place his hand on top of your chest so he can take in the way your heart beats for him for the second time tonight. 

“Good,” you turn a little, smiling at him and then turning to your room again “Do you want to help me clean this up just to make it messy again?” 

“Y/N!” 

Seonghwa doesn't help you clean your room. He, in fact, makes it a lot messier as soon as you two get into bed and when he falls asleep he dreams of a life where he can be by your side every night. 

The only thing that disturbs his sweet dreams is the way you squirm in his hold and he can't quite place the reason for it until he hears the loud, banging alarm ringtone he has set at six thirty so he can get ready for work. 

Murmuring and still half asleep, you slap his chest so he can tend to it “Turn it off, Ghost.” 

He does and he checks the time and the screen of his phone to find a message from his boss. It reads something about taking the opportunity to take the rainy day and work from home or something like that and Seonghwa can confirm, looking through your bedroom window, that the rain falls softly against it still. 

He smiles, grateful to have his laptop with him so he can work on his report if you decide not to kick him out first thing in the morning, and then rolls back to you so he can cuddle you and sleep in for the first time in months of commuting to the office. 

Then his phone rings again. 

Both of you groan at the sound and you sit up, the big t-shirt you put on after taking a shower gathering messily around your waist and he almost forgets about the call at the sight of you. 

You're so beautiful. 

“Pick it up and tell them to go fuck themselves for calling you so early. What the fuck.” 

He smiles “Bossy.” 

“You like it.” You say, smiling back and falling on top of him as he answers the call from an unknown number, your cheek resting on his chest. 

He makes sure his voice sounds extra sleepy when he does “Hello?” 

“Good morning, mister Park!” It's a woman on the line, a voice he recognizes but can't quite place yet “I'm sorry to wake you up, but yesterday you asked me what good you're to me… Guess what? You can find out today!” 

She sounds sarcastic and tired and like she drank seventy energy drinks to stay awake. Seonghwa scavenges his brain until the memory hits him “Miss Kim?” 

You look up at that, curious. 

“The one and only. Now, tonight you will accompany me to a party and—” 

“Miss Kim—” 

“I'm not finished,” you cuts him off, annoyed “At the party, I need you to pretend to be my boyfri—” 

“No.” 

“Excuse me?” 

“No, I will not go to the party with you and no, I will not pretend to be your boyfriend.” 

Now, you sit up on the bed again and frown at him. He shrugs and sits up as well.

“This could be a really great opportunity for you to gain connections and—” 

“Miss Kim,” he starts and, after taking in the sudden desperation on her voice, he sighs “I'm flattered you have taken me into consideration for this… Particular, uhm, job?” He offers, feeling awkward as hell “But my day is taken and I'm not single anymore, so I can't do it.” 

He watches you as you break into a little knowing smile and he smiles back, not even the disappointed sigh Miss Kim lets out on the other side of the line can break him away from the spell you so easily put him under. 

“This is very inconvenient for me but I hope you and the cool girl I saw yesterday are happy together… Even if it ruins my happiness forever!” She sounds like she doesn't really mean the last part but it's trying hard to make it seem like she does “God… Ugh. Don't mention this to my brother and please cover that stupid tree up, okay? Goodbye.” 

She hangs up before he even gets the chance of saying goodbye or asking if she'll be okay. He has friends who wouldn't pass the opportunity to fake a relationship and go to a party, anyway. 

“So,” you start, getting on your knees and making your way back to him “What the fuck was that?” 

He reaches for your waist without really thinking about it, like he's been doing it his whole life and you sit on his lap like this is a morning routine you two crafted with years of experience. 

“I don't really know. Remember my client's sister?” you nod “She wanted me to be her fake boyfriend at a party tonight, I think.” 

“And you told her you're not single anymore to save face because you didn't want to go?” 

“I told her I wasn't single because I'm not,” he says, honestly “Even if you're not my girlfriend right now… I don't really want to see anyone else but you, so…” 

You fake a gasp and he rolls his eyes, smiling like an idiot when you lean in to leave a peck on his lips “And I was about to kick you out ten minutes ago!” 

Pouting, he holds you tighter “Why?” 

“That stupid alarm almost made me.” 

“I turned it off!” 

You laugh at the way he pretends to be offended and you're about to say something else before his phone starts ringing like crazy. 

It's not a call, it's a message notification. 

He turns to it and sees that Yunho is spamming the group chat with emojis. 

“Oh, God,” he sighs “What now?” 

“Is that your friend from yesterday?” 

“Mhm.” 

When Seonghwa scrolls to the messages to find something that can indicate what the hell is going on, he reads something a little alarming. 

Does anyone want to skip town tonight? 

He blocks the phone and tosses it into the bed, turning to your worried form with a smile “Do you want to meet my friends tonight?” 

You seem to get it immediately. 

“I would love to, Ghost,” you lean in to kiss him again, softly “Only if you introduce me as your girlfriend and not your mechanic, though.” 

Heart beating with a wonderful song, he agrees with soft yes and kisses you dumb for the first time today. 

He almost misses the deadline for his report, too. 

It's not really his fault that he can't get enough of you. 

If you read all the way down here: THANK YOU SO MUCH. Any feedback would be greatly appreciated!

© jensthwa, 2024.

[bunny-jpeg]

nurse lance

lance stroll

tags: smut & fluff, sick/sweet fic, gentle sex, established relationship, sick!reader, cowgirl position

a/n: i went to visit hare this weekend and came back with a fever & cold. and right before the holidays too!!!

lance was a sucker for when you were sick. he wasn't unfamiliar with a cold and knew his way around a can of chicken noodle soup. he seemed to up the affection when he knew you were under the weather.

you had a habit of playing it off when you felt under the weather, you believed that your partner had more than enough things to worry about. he didn't need you having the sniffles on top of it. but by god does he always find out quickly.

"well, there's three things you always do when you're sick." he said as he pulled up the covers to your chin, he pushed the blankets under your sides effectively putting you into a black burrito, "one, you get very quiet because your head hurts. two, you limp a little because your joints hurt. and three, your eyes looks heavy and tired because your entire being is fighting off infection." he took you by the cheeks and kissed you on the forehead.

"i'm fine, lance. it's just the weather changing." you could barely keep your eyes open as you laid under the covers he tucked you into. you opened your eyes a little more to see his hands on your cheeks once more.

"right, right... and you'll be as good as new tomorrow, eh? you need rest." he said, "and i don't want to see you up until i get you some tea." he pulled away and wagged a finger at you.

you felt the heat in your face from the sickness and you nodded, "of course, honey.." you felt the heaviness in your eyes once more and by the time lance was out of the bedroom you had gotten more comfortable in bed and eventually fell asleep. you hated when he was right, even though you loved him deeply. lance kept close to you, he even brought his laptop to the bedroom to check emails and keep himself busy while you rested.

it was only right of him, you cheered him on. not only him but the whole team! you gave him all your love, so if you were feeling under the weather then he'd simply take care of his love. his everything.

-

however, when you started to feel better. you returned the favour for your lover. nurse lance deserved a raise after everything he had done for you. once the coughing settled and the aches were gone. when you felt a bit more alive and after dinner, you took lance by the hand. left the dishes in the sink before you brought him up to the bedroom you shared.

"we don't have-"

"i'm alright." you said, "much better now, you've been looking after me for days now." you unzipped your hooded sweatshirt and took it off you. you liked how lance looked at you when he was getting turned on by you.

"you promise?" he asked, "you owe me nothing."

you reached out for him and took his shirt by the shoulders, "i mean, i benefit from it too. haven't been able to get pleasure while i was sick. a change of pace from the aches and pains." and giggled when lance pulled the sweatpants off you.

your clothes were soon all over the floor by the bed as the two of you got into bed together. he ran his hands across your sides as you straddled his waist. you placed your hands on his shoulders and admired him. those dark eyes that pulled you in, how he smiled at you. the way the tips of his ears got hot when he was intimate with you. the rush of want made im perfectly pink.

"last chance." he said, he wanted total confidence that you were doing this of your own free will. no questions asked.

you took him by the face and gazed into his eyes, "i want you lance, i want you so fucking badly. is that what you want to hear?" then pressed a kiss against his soft lips. he shuddered and let out a small laugh after you broke the kiss. you looked down at him and laughed in return, "happy?"

"with you? always, babe." then winked at you before he helped you get seated on his cock. the stretch was a bit much at first, but soon you were fully taking him.

your hands on his shoulders as you started to move against him. move at a steady, slow pace. nothing too brutal, only gentleness between you two. you admired him. you loved him. deeply.

you were feeling better, the cough was mostly gone and you didn't have the dull throb in your head. it felt nice to be intimate with him once more. you held onto him tightly as you moved your hips. the pleasure sank down to your core and left you needy for him. you were always needy for him. there was something about him that pulled you in.

he was unlike any other man you ever met. not because he was a racer, he was different from them too. the way he smiled at you, how he seemed to remember all the important dates. that he modified how he worked so he could keep a close eye on you.

"i love you." you said softly, "you are fuckin' amazing, lance." you cupped his face for a moment as you picked up the pace. but lance held onto your hips to slow you down.

you looked at him curiously and he said, "let's take our time. i know you're better, but i don't want you to push yourself so hard until you're totally fine again." then gave you a smile that melted your heart.

you said softly, "fuck, lance. you're so cheesy."

he replied, "only with you." then pulled one of your hands to his face where he could kiss right where your wrist ended and your hand began. he met your pace slowly and kissed across your wrist and hand with a sort of devotion that made your stomach flutter.

the two of you continued to make love, the feeling was electric as the two of you moved against one another. the pace remained gentle, his love for you flowed through your body as you moved against him slowly. you loved the feeling, it left you feeling hot all over as pleasure bloomed in your core. there was something about him that just left you needy.

you could remember almost every time he used those skilled fingers and tongue to use, the videos of himself masturbating he would send. even the sweet text messages, you were wrapped up in his world and you loved it.

"fuck, lance." you said.

"you feel amazing, i'm glad you're feeling better." he said, "i want you not sick, not if i can prevent it. even though you do look rather cute with a runny nose." then gave your hand another kiss before he placed his hands back on your hips. he helped maintain the pace as he gazed up at you. fuck, you were beautiful.

"no need to lay it on so thick, lance." you laughed between heavy, lustful pants, "i know you're obsessed with me."

"how could i not be? not when you're so funny, and cute, and sweet. of course i'll love and take care of you. that's what a good boyfriend does." he remarked as he felt the flutter of lust through him as he moved against you.

you two continued to move, love was said in words and felt in the want between you two. it was hot, erotic in a way that made your toes curl as you continued to ride him. pleasure thumped in your chest as you rode him.

"you're such a sweet talker." you said as you went in for another heated kiss. the pleasure near hit its peak as you rode him. the heat curled in your core as you held onto him a little tighter, "fuck, i need to cum."

he said out of breath, "then cum for me." and groaned when you clenched around him as you climaxed. the pleasure swarmed your brain as you felt your entire body grow tense for a moment. he groaned, "fuck." it felt good, really good.

it was only hotter when you continued to move against him, eager for his own climax. he groaned louder and felt his orgasm wash over him. he cursed under his breath and you continued to ride him through his climax. your legs felt like jelly, but you loved the feeling.

"lance."

"i got you." he said as the two of you slowed down to a stop. you coughed a little from the physical activity. you still weren't a hundred percent. the two of you laid out next to each other on the bed, and lance got the blankets over both of you. he held you face and kissed you some more. you coughed a little bit and he kissed your nose, "alright, let's get comfy. you're obviously still sick."

and you were inclined to agree

-

a few days later, lance woke up to a sore throat and a little too much crust in his eyes, when he opened his eyes slowly the light that streamed through the window felt oppressive.

he rolled over and up against your shoulder. his hands felt cold as he cuddled with you. the iciness of his palms woke you up and you yawned loudly and looked at him.

he looked up at you, his normally big brown eyes eyes partially closed and full of sleep. then he started to cough and you pressed your lips against his forehead. he groaned a little.

you pulled away and looked at him, "i guess it's time for me to take care of you." and then your eyes went wide when he wrapped himself up against you.

"will you, please?" he asked quietly.

you chuckled and snuggled up next to him, "of course." if you two were going to share the same cold over the course of the off season then so be it. because he'll always take care of you, and you'll take care of him <3

[finelinevogue]

life goes on

summary - just a tiny blurb of post tour engagement talk

a/n : this contains a very brief mention of cancer, so be aware of that xx

word count : ~1k

pairing : boyfriend!harry x reader

The sun was setting just down past the mountains.

It had been a busy day and everyone was exhausted. You had all gone on a couple of yachts out to sea to dolphin watch and then come back and swam in the sea onshore.

After the end of tour, Harry had invited all of his family out to spend a month together in his gorgeous Italian house in the countryside. It was perfect for everyone, because it had endless garden land, a hot tub and a large swimming pool. It was a great house for the kids.

Harry’s family’s children were hear, and could be currently heard running around the garden with Nerf guns Uncle Harry had bought them to play with.

Currently, everyone was sat outside on the large patio area. There were bean bags, L-shaped sofas and other various comfortable chairs for people to sit on and none were spare.

“H?” Gemma asked, “Where’s Y/N?”

“Toilet I think.” Harry answered.

“When are you and Y/N getting married then, H?” Harry’s uncle, Dave, asked.

Harry laughed in shock and a few people cheered to that idea.

A lot of people were nursing beers and a few others with various cocktails they’d made for themselves. You had helped Harry set up a help-yourself bar for everyone to make whatever they wanted.

Harry himself had a Corona in hand, with a lime in the top because apparently that’s the best way you take it.

“Oh, let them be!” Anne shushed her brother up. “They’re still in their honeymoon phase.”

Anne watched as her son got all shy, blushing as he thought about how in love he was with you. Anne smiled, knowing her boy would always be happy with you by his side.

“They’ve been in that phase for six years now. The poor girl will run if he doesn’t ask soon.” Dave piped up again.

“Y/N can ask me too, y’know.” Harry suggested, shrugging his shoulders.

“We all know you’re too romantic to let Y/N do that.” Someone else piped up, to which they all agreed.

“Heyy!” Harry protested, but deep down he knew they were right.

Harry had always wanted to get to ask you the big question. Being engaged and looking forward to his own wedding has been something he has looked forward to, ever since watching his first romcom.

Harry won’t settle for giving you anything less than the perfect proposal.

“I do want to be alive to see you get married, love.” Harry’s nan, Marge, chimed in, making everyone laugh.

“You will be, nan. I promise.” Harry held up his beer in promise to his nan. “And anyways, why aren’t you all nagging at Gem - whom is also still not married.”

Harry knew exactly why.

“Don’t believe in marriage, H.” Gem said. “Plus Michal says it’s too difficult choosing a ring.”

“That is true.” Michal nodded and agreed, making Gemma laugh and cuddle closer into his side on the sofa.

Harry looked at them and then towards the house, missing you after only two minutes. He wondered where you were.

“Have you gone ring shopping yet, H?” One of Harry’s aunts, Linda, asked.

“Yes.” Harry shot his head back around to face the conversation.

“Is it going to break the bank?” Dave asked.

“Nothing could dent that boys bank, Dave.” Linda laughed.

Harry smiled along, knowing the ring safely tucked away in his suitcase was just what you had asked for. It had been a reasonable price and it’s beauty outshone everything else.

“Y/N trusts me to pick out the right ring.”

“Good lad.” Dave nodded onto Harry.

“Excuse me a minute.”

Harry put his beer down on the floor and left his family to go in search of you.

He wandered into the house and because it was very open, he was able to tell you weren’t downstairs. He shouted your name up the stairs, but no one responded.

“Babe?” He called again, standing at the bottom of the stairs.

He was getting worried now and ran up the stairs two at a time. He wandered down the hall and straight into your shared bedroom.

No one was on the bed and no one was in the bathroom.

“Y/N?” Harry shouted again, a little more sternly this time. “Where the fuck is—”

He looked in and out of all bedrooms upstairs and the bathrooms too, but no sign of you.

As Harry rushed back down the stairs and opened the front door. He was ready to shout your name again when he saw you sitting the hammock by the front garden gate alone.

He closes the front door and furrowed his eyebrows as he walked quickly over to you.

“Baby? Where have you been?” He asked, dodging in between the cars as made his way to you.

You looked up at him and smiled, but it was one that did not reach your eyes.

Harry watched as you brought a small tissue up to your noses and wipe underneath. He put together, as he moved closer towards you, that you had been crying.

“Baby…” Harry said softly, coming down to crouch in front of you.

You swallowed a lump in the back of your throat and rolled your eyes at your own emotions. Harry was nothing but patient with you, waiting for you to gather up whatever thoughts you wanted to say.

Harry stayed crouched down in front of you, hands clasping yours to stop you from picking away at the skin by your nails - a nasty habit he was constantly telling you off for.

“It’s my mum. She’s back in hospital.” You sadly smiles, watching Harry’s face drop too.

Harry let out a tut and a heavy sigh, sagging his head in sadness.

“Cancer came back. She’s been in for a month and has only just told me.” Your words started to come out in splutters towards the end of your sentence as you began to cry again. “Fuck, m’sorry.”

Harry popped his head at your apology. “No, don’t you start apologising for things that don’t need an apology. Don’t care that this is celebrating post tour. All I care about is you and seeing that smile on your face. If you haven’t got a smile today, that’s okay but we’ll work together to put one back there again.”

You nodded your head in understanding.

Harry moved to sit next to you, laying you both down on the hammock. Harry sat so his feet still touched the floor, but you moved so your whole body was on the hammock and you could tuck yourself into his side. Harry rocked the two of you slowly and rubbed his hand up and down your back, whilst you closed your eyes and listened to the sound of Harry’s heartbeat.

“We can go see her when we’re back, can’t we?” You asked.

“Of course. Why do y’ask?”

“Just checking, in case you had music plans or anything.”

“Baby. You know I’m yours now for the foreseeable future.”

“I know.”

“We can go see her every day if you want.” Harry suggested, “And also. I don’t care what you say, I’m paying for any extra treatment and care to make sure she’s as comfortable as she can be.”

“Ha—”

“No I’m not arguing with you on this, love.”

“But…”

“Yeah, your butt is lovely, I know.” You could hear his smirk as he patted your ass lightly with his hand.

That put a little smile on your face anyways.

“Thank you.” You said softly.

“It’ll be your bank account someday soon too.”

And you smiled again, knowing the prospect of an engagement was soon approaching.

[holylulusworld]

Their little maid (1)

Summary: Mafia business is dirty. The brothers need someone to clean up their mess and more.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x fem!Reader x Nick Fowler

Warnings: shy reader, flirty brothers, mafia business, money trouble, Walker is the worst, injured reader (nothing serious), blood

Their little maid masterlist

Catch up here: Their little maid (Prologue)

The brothers flank your sides, while you try not to hiss with every step. Your knees hurt, and you can feel blood dry on your skin. They told you to follow them down the hall and to their office.

Honestly, this house, or rather a mansion, is a maze. If you get the job, you’ll need a floor plan to find your way back outside.

“So, how did you find our job offer?” Bucky asks. He dips his head to watch you wring your hands. “Doll, you don’t have to be nervous. Walker is an ass; forget about him.”

“I found your offer on a website and applied to the job offer,” you cringe at the sound of your voice.

“What did you do before you decided to become our maid?” Nick throws in, stealing your attention when he places his warm hand on your shoulder. “Do you have experience in cleaning private homes?”

“N-o,” you sigh deeply. Of course, they’d ask about experience first. “I mean, I cleaned my home, and I helped an elderly lady before she moved into a nursing home. Does that count?”

Bucky chuckles because you look like a lost lamb surrounded by two big wolves. He watches you squirm under their gazes, feeling something more than amusement.

“I think that counts,” Nick furrows his brows at his brother. “Right, Bucky?”

“Yeah, sure,” Bucky clears his throat. He unlocks the office and holds the door open for you, murmuring your name as you walk inside. You stop in front of the large, mahogany double desk. Expectantly looking at the desk, you wait for Bucky and Nick to sit in their comfortable chairs.

“Have a seat,” Bucky gestures toward the leather couch. “Do you have your job references, resume, and cover letter with you?” He asks, looking at your empty hands. You start to sweat. Fuck, no. Out of all the days you could have messed things up, you chose this one.

“Oh-no!” You hide your face in the palms of your hands. “I left the Manila folder on my bed when I looked for a different shirt, and then I had to catch the bus and forgot about the folder.” You cringe because you’re so pathetic; the men try to calm you.

“Hey, that’s not the end of the world,” Nick says and places his hand on the small of your back, making you feel warm. “You can just tell us what you have done so far and bring us the folder next time. Don’t worry about a thing.”

Nick guides you toward the couch. He sits next to you, eyes glued to your knees.

“Before we begin, let’s get your knees clean. Maybe you need a bandage.” Bucky is fast to open a drawer in one of the cabinets to get a first aid kit out.

“No—no!” You raise your hand. “I can do this at home. I don’t want to waste your time, Mr. Barnes.”

“You can talk while Bucky cleans your wound. He likes playing nurse,” Nick teases while his hand moves up and down your back. You whine, feeling hot all of a sudden. “So, what was your last job?”

“Librarian,” you hastily say before your voice fails. “Uh—that’s the only job I ever had. Oh, and I sold ice cream during college, and I had a lemonade stand when I was a kid.” You curse under your breath. Why do you always have to babble and tell people things they don’t want to know about?

“A librarian,” Nick almost purrs the words. “Bucky, she was a librarian.” He hisses his brother’s name when Bucky doesn’t respond. Said man just stares at your bruised knees, lost in thoughts. “Buck, did you hear?”

“I got a problem to handle here, brother,” Bucky bites back. He doesn’t mean your bruised knees, though, but the twitch in his pants. Bucky knew the moment he laid eyes on you that you were the one they were looking for.

“I can see that,” Nick laughs, watching Bucky tug at his slacks. “You should finish what you started. Fix her knees, and we can talk later.” Nick moves a little closer, his hand dropping to the couch to brush your bottom. He hums when you squirm the moment his brother starts cleaning your wound. “Shush, sweetness. It’s all good.”

You wince because the sanitizer stings like hell. Biting your lower lip, you watch Bucky crouch down in front of you to get a better look at the damage Walker caused.

“Did you like your job?” He asks while swiping a cotton ball over your wound. “At the library.”

“Yeah.” You nod. “I liked it very much, but,” you heave a sigh. “They had to close because no one came to the library any longer.”

“You will like your new job too,” Bucky murmurs as he puts a bandage on your wound. “We need someone to clean up the mess we make daily. The house is huge, but don’t worry. We only want you to take care of our bedrooms and our clothes. The rest of the house is not your problem. We have people take care of it.”

“Oh—” you wrinkle your forehead. That’s odd. Why do they need someone to clean only their bedrooms and to take care of their wardrobe?

“You see,” Bucky grabs your hand to stop you from fidgeting. “We don’t trust anyone near our bedrooms or with our clothes. You’ll get a room next to your bedrooms, so you can take care of this part of the house and sleep over a long day of work.”

“Sleep…here?” You splutter. “But...I got an apartment...and...you want me to live here?”

“Oh, that’s part of the deal,” Nick whispers in your ear. “You must prove to us that we can trust you, sweetness. If you live here, you cannot tell anyone about our secrets.”

You still don’t understand a thing but nod. If you get the job now, you can ask questions later. Your landlord won’t wait another week for you to pay rent.

“That makes sense, I guess,” you lie. This doesn’t make sense at all, but you’re willing to do almost anything to get this job.

“It’s settled then,” Nick claps his hands. He looks at Bucky for confirmation. Well, the bulge in his brother’s pants tells him he’s more than willing to hire you. “Buck?”

“Yes.” Bucky looks at your knees one more time. He hums and gets back up. “We can discuss the details tomorrow. Welcome to our team, Y/N.” He holds out his hand, and you eagerly shake it. “I’ll call Barton and Romanoff to get her things.”

“Get my... what?” You stammer. “You want me to move in today?”

“I told you,” Nick places his hand on your thigh and flashes you a stunning smile. “Do not worry about a thing.”

Part 2

Tags in reblog.

[deliciousangelfestival]

The Malicious Daughter Is Back! - 16

Character : Bucky Barnes x Female!Reader

Summary: It's just a business marriage. Bucky thought it would be easy until he encountered the stepsister of his fiancée. She turned his world upside down.

Warning: Tragedy, Angst, Manipulation, Intimidation

The Malicious Daughter Is Back! Series Masterlist

Main Masterlist || Support : Ko-fi 🙏🏻

Thank you to everyone who has read this chapter. Leave a comment and Reblog, please. I'd love to hear your thoughts. ❤️

After what happened at the charity event, especially with Jonathan getting beaten up and sent to the hospital, everything descended into chaos. The words that came out of Patrick’s mouth traveled fast, becoming the hottest gossip in the elite circle.

It was the opposite inside one room. It was quiet. Too quiet. Because it was a patient room. Bucky was still sleeping, not waking up after his last encounter with his kidnapper. The bad dreams he had buried for a long time had resurfaced, haunting him again.

In his dream, he was a kid again, sitting on the cold floor, hugging himself. Behind the door, he heard some adult men laughing, their voices harsh and menacing. The room was dimly lit, the only light coming from the cracks under the door. The walls were bare, and the floor was cold and unforgiving. The air was thick with the smell of damp and neglect.

The laughter stopped abruptly. The door, which had been closed, creaked open. Finally, he could see a sliver of light again. Suddenly, the oppressive darkness receded.

“Wake up, Bucky.” He lifted his head and saw a person standing tall, holding a baseball bat in one hand.

It was you.

You leaned closer, offering your hand to him. “Time to go home,” you said softly.

Bucky slowly opened his eyes. The brightness almost blinded him, but soon his eyes adjusted to the light. He felt his left hand was heavier but warm.

He moved his head a bit and saw you, asleep on the side of his bed. Your hand was gently resting on his, your face soft in sleep. He noticed the slight rise and fall of your shoulders with each breath, the way your hair fell over your face. The sight filled him with a sense of comfort and safety he hadn’t felt in a long time.

Bucky’s fingers twitched slightly, the warmth of your hand grounding him in reality. He took a deep breath, the sterile scent of the hospital mixing with the faint scent of your perfume. For the first time in days, the nightmares began to fade, replaced by the reality of your presence.

His heart swelled with gratitude. You had been there for him, even when lost in his darkest dreams. He knew he wasn’t alone anymore.

He watched you for a moment, feeling a deep sense of relief. He didn’t want to wake you, but he needed to let you know he was alright. With a gentle squeeze of your hand, he whispered, “Hey.”

You stirred, blinking groggily as you lifted your head. When you saw Bucky’s eyes open, a wave of emotions washed over your face—relief, joy, and concern all at once. “Bucky! You’re awake,” you said, your voice thick with emotion.

He nodded, his voice still weak. “Thanks for being here.”

You gave his hand a reassuring squeeze. “I wouldn’t be anywhere else. How are you feeling?”

“Tired, but better now,” he said, his voice gaining a bit of strength. “I... I saw him.”

Your heart ached for him. “I know. But you’re safe now. He can’t hurt you anymore.”

Bucky took another deep breath, feeling the weight of your words. “It felt so real, like I was back there again. But then you showed up. You saved me.”

You smiled softly. “You saved yourself, Bucky. I was just there to remind you that you’re not alone.”

A soft knock on the door interrupted the moment. A nurse peeked in, smiling when she saw Bucky awake. “Good to see you up, Mr. Barnes. How are you feeling?”

“I’m okay,” Bucky replied, managing a small smile. “Thanks.”

The nurse checked his vitals and noted his progress. “You’ve got quite a few people waiting to see you. Should I let them know you’re awake?”

Bucky glanced at you, then nodded. “Yeah, let them know.”

As the nurse left, you leaned closer to Bucky. “I’ll stay as long as you need me.”

He squeezed your hand again. “Thank you.”

Minutes later, the door opened again; Rowan and Juliana hurriedly entered the room, their faces etched with worry.

“Bucky!” Juliana rushed to his side, her eyes filled with tears. “Are you alright?”

Bucky gave her a reassuring smile. “I’m fine, Mom. Really. But I have to leave now.”

Juliana frowned, her hand gently resting on his arm. “You just woke up. You need to rest.”

Bucky shook his head, a determined look in his eyes. “I feel better than ever, Mom. I’m finally free from the bad dreams that have haunted me for so long.”

Rowan, standing beside Juliana, placed a firm hand on Bucky’s shoulder. “Son, what are you planning to do?”

Bucky’s gaze hardened, his jaw set with resolve. “What I want to do now is give a lesson to the source of my nightmares. I can’t let this go on any longer.”

His parents exchanged a worried glance. Juliana's eyes softened as she reached out and touched Bucky’s cheek. “Just promise us you’ll be careful.”

Bucky nodded, his expression serious. “I promise. I’ll take care of this, and then I’ll come back. I need to do this.”

As he stood up, you, Rowan, and Juliana watched him, knowing there was no stopping him now. Bucky was determined, and nothing would stand in his way. Except for Rowan, whose mind was already on picking a good lawyer in case Bucky did something out of line.

🤜

Inside the shady bar, Lance watched the video of Patrick beating up Jonathan. He saw Genevieve standing by, watching her husband get pummeled.

Lance chuckled and puffed smoke from his mouth. "She left me for that guy? Idiot." He muttered. He leaned back, a smirk spreading across his face. Genevieve and he went way back, like Bonnie and Clyde. They were the perfect criminal partners, but one day, she decided to leave and chase a rich guy. He shook his head, still smirking, as he flicked the ash from his cigar.

Suddenly, his relaxation was interrupted by a scream, "Boss! Someone is attacking us!"

Lance stood up quickly, grabbing his gun. He saw many men in suits, each armed, entering the bar. He was completely outnumbered.

The uninvited group made a path for someone. This person looked different from the rest. Lance immediately recognized him. The little boy who once looked helpless had now grown into a formidable man.

From that second, he knew. He had fucked up.

Lance didn’t remember what happened next, but he woke up tied to a chair in a dark room, illuminated by a single bulb. In front of him were various torture devices. He screamed, "Help!!!" The once-strong man now trembled like a scared child. Who would have thought that Lance's weakness was needles?

Bucky watched everything from a TV screen, with Rowan beside him. Rowan’s face was impassive, but his eyes showed a mixture of concern and resolution.

"How long are you going to keep him here?" Rowan asked, his voice calm but firm.

Bucky’s gaze never left the screen. "Half of my life was robbed by him. He will spend the rest of his life here." He turned away, his posture tense but determined. "I have a lot more work to do. I need to make sure to erase Lance's existence from this world."

Rowan nodded, his expression one of silent agreement. He wouldn't say anything against Bucky's decision; if his son finally defeated his demons, he would support him.

🏥

Back to Jonathan, who had slipped into a coma for a while. The doctors had assured everyone that he would wake up shortly.

Jonathan who still asleep, but he could still hear everything around him. Genevieve’s frantic voice pierced through his foggy consciousness: “The investors want to sue us? On what grounds?” she screamed at the company lawyer.

Then he heard Victoria's distressed voice. “Mom, what the heck? My image is ruined, and all the brands are cutting their ties with me!”

Neither of them expressed any concern for him.

The Celestial Enterprises had fallen apart in just a few days. While Jonathan lay helpless, Patrick had launched a relentless attack on the Sinclair empire, dismantling it piece by piece, like plucking petals from a flower.

How could Patrick do it so effortlessly? He had the help of the Barnes family. Bucky had uncovered the dark history between Genevieve and Lance, adding more fuel to the fire. The Celestial's share price plummeted, and they found themselves in hot water.

Jonathan finally woke up. As his eyes fluttered open, Genevieve rushed to his side, her face a mask of worry. “We need you. The company needs you,” she pleaded, her voice trembling.

He stared at her with piercing eyes, the depth of his disappointment and regret palpable in his gaze. “Why did I choose you?” His voice was barely whispery, yet it cut through the air like a knife.

Genevieve's breath hitched. “You…” she started, but he cut her off.

“Why did I abandon my Ophelia for someone like you?” Jonathan’s voice was cold and distant.

“Stop it,” she whispered, her eyes filling with tears.

Jonathan ignored her plea. “Fast forward Victoria's wedding. It will help the company,” he ordered, his voice devoid of emotion.

Genevieve was shocked. “You’re going to send our daughter to marry that psycho?” she asked, her voice breaking.

Jonathan’s gaze remained cold and unyielding. “Do it,” he commanded, turning his face away from her. He seemed utterly unbothered by the collapse of his empire, his mind consumed by regrets and a relentless drive to salvage what little he could.

Genevieve's hands trembled as she backed away, her mind reeling from the coldness in his eyes. She realized that the man she once thought invincible was now shattered, and she was left to pick up the pieces of a life built on lies and ambition.

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Author Note: Hey friends,

If you've been enjoying the content, I've set up a Ko-fi account.

Your support through tips would mean the world and help me keep creating.

Only if you feel like it!

Here's the link: Ko-fi

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[heartcereql]

"𝐩𝐚𝐰𝐧 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐩 𝐛𝐥𝐮𝐞𝐬"

☆ tommy shelby x fem!wife!reader

𝐂𝐖- mentions of pregnancy and pregnancy loss, mentions of death, cursing, not proofread.

you hadn't dared to move since the doctors last came and spoke to you. you had barely blinked. it was like everything inside of you had suddenly stopped. you had stopped hearing the busy chattering of nurses in the hallway, the clattering of metal here and there. you had stopped smelling the clean cotton of the hospital bedsheets, the sweat that had now dried all over your body. you had stopped feeling the way your hair stuck to your forehead, and the lingering feeling of rubber gloves all over your skin. you had stopped tasting the blood on your lips from all the anxious biting; and only reminiscences of the anguished screams.

you only counted the times you inhaled and exhaled, focused only on your breath as tears fell from your eyes, silent and unnoticed.

in... seventy-three... out.

and again. wishing they carried some other mystical power to relieve your pain other than keeping your mind busy, you felt limp. like all life had just expired from you. in a way, it had. you felt empty because you were. after all this time, there was nothing.

your silence and self absortion was, however, disrupted by loud fluttering in the corridors, voices shrieking louder everytime. you gained consciousness over yourself again, slow but steady. your hands, now trembling faintly again, wiped out the recent and dried tears on your face, the touch feather-like, as you didn't have much force left in you.

but, amidst the chaos of voices, footsteps, trays and other unidentifiable noises, you found a voice you did recognize.

"-the fuck is she? i will find her myself if i fucking have to"

you perked your head at the familiar voice, irking straighter at the sound of your husband.

"sir, we've told you, she's not stable enough for-"

but tommy interrupted the nurse again. "where is my wife?"

"sir! you can't reach her now, she's-"

thud. after another voice told the nurse to just take mr shelby to your room, for the love of whoever was listening, the voices seemed to cool down and then the chatter and steps intensified as they approached your door.

"you stay away" was tommy's last warning to the nurse, before barging in.

you had tried to look away from the door, focusing on the green tiles of the hospital floor, desperately attempting to hide your vulnerability to tommy. but your eyes betrayed you, immediatly shooting up at your husband as he entered the space.

his cheeks were rosy, probably a mix from the cold weather outside and all the shouting to the nurses. his eyes weren't harsh and piercing, as many would recall; they just showed preoccupation. his cap was on his hand, held tightly out of nervousness.

"what? what happened? how are you? how is she?" tommy bombarded you with questions since the second he walked into the hospital room, rushing to your side.

your eyes were red and puffy, tears dried out and wiped away on your skin. your lip quivered when you spoke, as did your hands. "i'm sorry. i am so, so sorry, tom, i-"

you couldn't finish, for you broke into sobs. he laced a hand with yours, while the other came to hold your head, petting your hair in an attempt to calm you down.

"what happened, eh?" he asked, tracing the patterns he knew relaxed you where his skin touched yours.

he tried to remain calm. nevertheless, alarm was ringing through his body.

all sorts of questions and thoughts raced through tommy's mind. questions about his daughter, fear of the worst, worry about his wife. he pressed a kiss to your temple gingerly, as you let out a shaky breath, gripping his hand tighter.

"she- oh god." you paused to wipe some tears and to catch your breath after a hiccup. "when the nurses pulled her out, she-she wasn't, tommy she was-" you couldn't finish the sentence.

and you didn't have to. tommy could guess how it ended, and he pulled you closer to him, resting his chin on top of your head as you wept into his shoulder, gripping him as if he was going to disappear. as if he was going to disappear too.

the fact that tommy wasn't crying didn't mean by any chance he didn't want to. his eyes stung and he wanted nothing but to break down. but not there, not with you. because you needed him.

he was still recovering from the shock as well. everything was perfect a few hours ago, when you'd gone into labor. so what had happened? and why to you?

your voices danced; you muttering quavering 'sorry's, tommy gently reassuring you that it was okay, and that it wasn't your fault. but the feeling of impotence was constantly hovering over you; the guilt, the rage, the sadness, the fear, all the emotions blended together to overwhelmingly drown you.

"i'm sorry, tom" you snifled, voice sounding suddenly too young, too fragile.

he just held you tighter, closing his eyes as if that would make the pain go away.

after some moments, you pulled away. now your breathing was more controlled at tears only welled in your eyes.

"she wasn't breathing. when the nurses pulled her out, she wasn't-" hiccup "fuck, sorry. she wasn't breathing, tom..." you ended the sentence in a whisper.

you then told him what the nurses had tried to explain to you in your hysterical state. though you were now considerably calmer, you still refused to meet his eyes, as if they would only confirm that your daughter was dead even before she was born.

"she choked on the umbilical cord apparently. nothing they could do; she was born dead" you explained, voice breaking but managing to keep the tears at bay. pain stung in your chest, anxiety, desolation and guilt clawing and scratching you inside out.

"fuck.." tommy muttered under his breath. he ran a hand over his temple, curling it then into his hair.

but he grabbed you hand with his free one, a silent vow of inconditional solace, a reminder of the promise to forever be there for each other.

as he noticed your eyes watering again, he gave a gentle squeeze to your hand. " 's okay" he mumbled, his voice hoarse but still soft. " 's gonna be alright." tommy pressed a kiss to your hand, your fingers and knuckles icy under his lips. "everything's gonna be alright".

as he put your hand back down to rest at your side, tommy stood up and leaned down a bit to embrace your quivering figure into a hug.

"i won't be long, love, i just have to go for a moment" he softly said, voice so unusually calm for him. making his way to the door, he was stopped in his tracks when you called his name.

"tom" you called again, making him turn to face you. "don't go, please" you said, your voice breaking at your plea.

he froze in his spot. he was mentally and emotionally wrecked, but still, he knew he couldn't just let the world he had built for himself, for you (even for her, though he didn't even dare think about it), fall apart.

"o-or don't, i'll be fine. sorry, it was stupid and pretentious. just stop by-"

but he was by your side again before you could even finish your sentence.

"i'm not going anywhere. i'm staying." he mumbled in a raspy whisper, sitting down next to you on the bed and bringing your hand in his again, his eyes watery. "'m staying."

you nodded, mumbling a quiet 'okay' and clutching his hand tighter.

he was staying.

[creepycranberry]

Sweet man

Rafe Cameron x fem! Reader

Warnings: mentions of alcohol, drugs, addiction. Cursing. Not proofread. I think that’s it.

->->->->->

Your friends meant well, they really did. they tried their best to watch after you and warn you about him but every time they tried you countered their points and ignored their pointed looks when you simply told them that they didn’t know him like you did.

JJ was so pissed at you constantly, Kie would judge you silently and John B would keep his mouth shut. You felt like you were walking on eggshells every time your phone went off, Rafes face lit up on the screen.

It all came to a head one night when Rafe called you during a movie night. He knew how your friends felt about him, he knew from the moment pope saw both of y’all together in a spot on the beach that was meant to be secluded and the usually levelheaded boy shook his head in disappointment.

“JJs gonna freak.” He had said, thinking he was out of Rafes earshot.

“I can’t help it, Pope.”

“Can’t or don’t want to?” Pope argued, it stung to hear him so blatantly disdainful of your actions.

“He’s different with me.”

“I’m sure he is.” Pope sighed.

Rafe didn’t care what your friends thought of him, they could fuck themselves for all he cared, but he could see the tears forming in your eyes and it made his stomach twist and his heart soften.

And since then if he knows you’re with your friends, he keeps his distance.

But tonight was different, he was sad and drunk, you could hear it in his voice as you ignored the pointed looks your friends were giving you.

“I need to see you.” Rafes voice was rough from exhaustion and his words were slurred by the effect of whatever he drank.

“I’m busy, hon. Is everything okay?” You sat up off the couch, JJ muttered under his breath as he wiped the aggravated expression on his face.

“You mean a lot to me,” he slurred, loud music was being played in the background, getting farther away as the seconds drew on, “you have to know that.”

“I know, baby,” JJ gagged dramatically and John B slapped his arm, you roll your eyes and make your way into the next room, “is something wrong?”

“I love you.” He pouts, his voice thick with drunken emotion.

“Oh yeah?” You smile, leaning against the porch railing.

“Yeah, I just- Top was being stupid and he was drunk and everyone was drunk and I might have been a little drunk but- that-that- it’s not the point.”

“What is the point?” You ask him and he sighs deeply.

“Well Top said something and he was so- I don’t think he knew what he was saying but we kinda got into it and he said- he just-” Rafe stops speaking abruptly and you hear a slight hiccup on the other end of the call, “I just really need to see you, I-i wanna hold you.”

“Rafe-” you start.

“You’re so nice to hold, did you know that? I love holding you. Just come here, let me hold you.” He pouts.

“Rafe, I’m with my friends right now, I can’t just leave, they’d be pissed if I flaked on them.” You reason and Rafe groans loudly.

“Just one time, baby. I miss you, I need to hold you. I-I just need to be able to- just please come over.”

“I can’t, Rafe. They’re already pissed that you called me tonight, but tomorrow morning I will be there to nurse your hangover and to hold you like my life depends on it.”

The silence on the other end of the phone call feels never ending and then the call ends and you’re left sitting there, wondering what the hell had gotten into him tonight.

You head back to the living room, taking back your spot on the couch.

“What’d he want?” JJ asks bitterly and pope flicks him on the temple.

“He just missed me.” You shrugged, refocusing on the tv.

“I’m sure he did.” JJ sighs.

“JJ, come on.” Sarah nudges his leg from her place on the floor.

“What do you mean ‘come on’? Are we just going to keep acting like absolutely nothing is happening? Like we don’t have a problem with this shit?”

“We don’t have a problem with it, Jaje. You do.” Kie sighs and JJ shakes his head.

“I don’t see why you guys think it’s better to just lie to her to protect her feelings, were her friends, we’re supposed to tell her the truth whether we think she’ll like it or not!” JJ insists and you shuffle uncomfortably in your seat.

“We don’t have a problem with her dating him, we just have a problem with him. She knows that.” Pope shrugs.

“Can you guys not talk about me like I’m not sitting right here?” You mutter under your breath and JJ nods.

“Of course, sweetheart.” He says, turning himself so his feet are sat on the couch in front of him and he’s facing you, “I hate your boyfriend.”

“I know, JJ.”

“And it’s your life so you’re free to do whatever you want, we just don’t get why you’re doing whatever you want- with him.” He explains further.

“Because I like him.” You shrug.

“That’s the part we’re not quite understanding.” JJ clarifies.

“I like him. He’s sweet to me and he always defends me. He respects my emotions and my wishes and he never lets his emotions about the people around me affect how he treats me and I- I like him.” You shrug.

“I genuinely find that hard to believe.” Kie mutters and you scoff.

“Well that makes sense for you kie.”

“What does that mean?” She asks and you shrug.

“Nothing, you’re just a very cynical person.”

“I’m cynical for a reason.”

“I don’t doubt that, I just wish that your trust in my judgment could overshadow that cynicism sometimes.” You argue and she sighs heavily.

“You’re too naive to have good judgement.” Kie accuses and you roll your eyes.

“Okay, Kie.” You sigh, staring at the ceiling.

“We just really don’t want you to get hurt.” Sarah says in an attempt to diffuse the tension.

“I get that, I understand that much, I use don’t understand why you guys won’t trust me on this.”

“We trust you.” Pope says and your skeptical look makes him sigh, “we really do. We’re just kind of wary about him.”

“I know I just- he’s so sweet with me. I feel so protected with him and he’s really different when he’s with me.” You try using your regular argument for ending these discussions but today they aren’t having it.

“I believe you when you say that he has a good streak, I get that, but it’s his bad streak we’re more worried about. What happens when you guys have your first fight? Or when he sees you talking to a different guy and he gets jealous?” Sarah responds calmly.

“We’ve had arguments before, he never lets them escalate past arguments and he’s seen me with different friends of mine that are guys and I mean- he is a bit tenser but the tension diffuses so quickly and he’s just sweet as can be.”

You feel like you’re trying to convince them the tooth fairy is real. They’re all staring at you in utter disappointment and disbelief.

“He’s crazy is what he is.” JJ pipes up and you roll your eyes for what feels like the millionth time.

“JJ, I’m really trying. And he is too. He respects my relationship with you guys, even if he’s not y’all’s biggest fan.”

“That is a wild understatement.” John B retorts and you narrow your eyes at him, he speaks up before you can send a snarky remark his way, “he’s reckless and sometimes a danger to even himself. He used to be a raging addict, and even if he’s not still a total dick, he still is the fucking worst.”

“I don’t think you or JJ can say a thing concerning recklessness and he’s been clean for like a year now. He’s doing his best.”

“Say what you want about him, it’s your life so do what you want,” JJ exhales through his nose, “but just know that he’s one bump away from homicidal.”

You stare at each of your friends, the judgmental looks on their faces enough to upset and anger you.

“Why can’t you just trust me? I know him, I know him fully. I know he can be so genuinely sweet and-and the most loving and he has such potential to be so good and he’s trying to get there.” You look at JJ as you begin to tear up in desperation, he doesn’t meet your eyes, his gaze trained on the couch cushion between the two of you, “whatever. No matter how I or he tries to prove it you won’t believe me.”

You get off of the couch and grab your bag from by the coffee table, your friends calling after you.

The only one who gets up to run after you is JJ. He catches up somewhat effortlessly and loops his fingers around your wrist, “sweetheart, come on.”

“You won’t listen to me. I’m not gonna sit in there and listen as you guys insult and degrade my boyfriend. I can’t do it, JJ.” The tears are flowing consistently now and JJ can’t stand seeing you cry but he knows that isn’t any reason to agree with you.

“We just want you safe. I want you safe. We’ve seen the shit he’s capable of and it’s not pretty. He can be reckless and violent and we don’t want that for you. Sweetheart you’ve gotta understand that.” He says, reaching for your other wrist but you shake your head.

“But I’ve also seen what he’s capable of. He can be so good JJ and he really trying, please just- even if you don’t believe me, just trust me.” You plead and JJ just stares at you for a moment. Tears framing his eyes as he tries in earnest to see Rafe as anything that can possibly good for you.

“I’m sorry.” His voice wavers as he drops your hands, “I want to see what you do, I don’t want to spend my energy hating someone who makes you happy but you have to understand-“

“I understand I just- I have to go.” You sniffle and he nods, watching you as you walk away from the house, cursing before dejectedly heading back inside.

->->->->->

Rafe wasn’t home when you got there so you sat on the porch swing, attempting to self soothe as you waited for him.

When his truck pulls up he doesn’t notice you there for a minute as he attempts to find his keys in his pocket.

When he looks up he sees you, curled up on the porch swing.

“Weren’t you drunk?” You sniff and he shakes his head.

“I stopped drinking after I called you, drank some water and waited until I was sober enough to drive, what happened?” He asks, staring at you like you fell from the sky.

“They hate you.” You mumble.

“Who? Your friends?”, You nod and sniffle again, wiping your eyes for the umpteenth time, “let’s go inside, baby.”

He offers you his hands and practically lifts you off of the porch swing, his hand landing on the small of your back as he led you inside and through the house until you got to his bedroom.

He sat you on the bed while he changed, stopping every so often to kiss you on the cheek or forehead.

When he sits back next to you he pulls you into his chest, “what happened, baby?”

“You called and the I went inside and they just started saying all this shit. I’m not even upset that they don’t like you I just wish they trusted my judgment a bit more.”

“What did they say?” He asks, his voice hardening.

“Rafe-“

“What did they say, sweetness?” His voice softens once again as he refocuses on you, moving the hair out of your face.

“That you’re reckless and violent and that when you were an addict you were-“

“Yeah. Yeah I was.” He sighs, “I get that they don’t like me, that’s fine, and far be it from me to defend those assholes,” you give him a look that’s almost a pout and he backtracks, “I know, let me finish. Everything they said is true, in fact I was probably worse than they described me. And despite how I feel about them, they do really care about you. I don’t think trust they’ve ever questioned their trust in you but me-“

“But you’re trying to be better.”

“I am, sweets, I really am. But that doesn’t change what they saw. They don’t trust me with you. That’s all it is.” He shrugs, kissing your forehead and rubbing the side of your arm.

“You do realize you just spent the last five minutes defending them, right?” You smile and he exhales, letting his head hang dramatically, feigning shame.

“I would rather my ego take a hit than your feelings, baby.” He sighs and you smile wide.

“You’re so sweet.” You gush and he groans, falling back onto the bed and dragging you down with him as you laugh.

“No, I’m not sweet. I’m brooding and surly.”

“Maybe to everyone else but to me you’re just the sweetest.” You smile.

“That’s because you’re impossible to be even a little mean to.” He turns on his side to face you, his head rested on his arm.

“What does that mean?”

“It means that all it takes is those pretty eyes looking up at me and suddenly all the mean bones in my body turn to mush, making it impossible for me to be mean to you.” He jokes, pulling you closer to him by your waist and enveloping you in his warmth.

Everything slips away as he pushes your chin up to reach your lips, his hands making their way into your hair. You hum against his lips, so perfectly content. Once you pull away the blush fans across your cheeks and you hide in his neck.

His chest vibrates against you as he laughs softly at you and your flustered state.

“You’re so damn precious.” He sighs.

“I love you.” You smile shyly and he sighs, his eyes soft and so happy to be holding your gaze.

“I love you too.”

[inawickedlittletown]

Who Could Ask You Be Unbroken Or Be Brave Again - BuckTommy (one-shot)

Summary: When Buck figures out that he's pregnant just a few weeks after the break-up, he has to tell Tommy. They talk. Words: 3.1k Notes: Sooooo I actually started writing this last week and I pictured a different fic entirely and yet I like to go where the journey takes me so here we are. Mpreg is a feature, but not like the most important part of this fic, though I know the fandom has taken it and run with it. The title comes from Hozier's To Noise Making Read on Ao3

-

If it weren’t for Maddie, Buck probably wouldn’t have figured it out. Well, he would have eventually. Probably. 

When he was on the cusp of teenagehood, the nurse at school had come in to have a talk with his class. The boys and the girls were separated and Buck remembered watching a badly shot movie. She had passed out a paper to take home at the end, information for their parents. Buck didn’t remember if his parents had even bothered to read it, much less take the advice. As a consequence, when all the rest of the boys in his class got tested, Buck didn’t. Later on, it just didn’t matter because Buck wasn’t having sex with guys so what difference did it make if he was a carrier? Then, when he got together with Tommy, it hadn’t even crossed his mind. 

So, he never knew that he could get pregnant. 

Not until he was pregnant. 

Not until he was leaning over his toilet, knees on the hard floor, stomach empty. Not until he remembered Maddie and the brie he’d baked for her and how when he’d cut a piece of the banana bread earlier the smell of the bananas had made him feel sick. 

Not until he managed to make it out of the apartment and to the nearest pharmacy where he stared at the pregnancy tests until finally just grabbing four at random. He was glad the girl at the checkout didn’t say anything. 

They all came back positive. 

There was no denying it.

In the bathroom, he took off his t-shirt and looked down at his abdomen. There was nothing different about his body, but eventually it would change. He would round out, growing a life in the womb that Buck hadn’t even known he had. Tentatively, he touched his stomach. In that moment he realized that he hadn’t even thought about it before already knowing that he was doing it. He would have the baby. He was going to be a dad. 

Tommy had left him — had left them. 

He was the other dad. 

Buck had to throw up.

Pregnant. He was pregnant. He was housing life, a life created out of him and Tommy…Tommy was gone. He had walked out of Buck’s life without a look back and Buck was once again the one that was left behind except that this time it wasn’t only him. His hand drifted to his abdomen. There was a baby in there. 

That was when the tears began anew. 

What the hell was he going to do?

Buck had cried for the better part of an hour after Tommy left. Then, he cried on Eddie’s couch and couldn’t even get the words out for why. 

“He dumped me,” he’d said eventually. “Tommy dumped me.” 

Then, the tears had started again. 

He cried when he got home the next morning and immediately he had to talk himself out of calling Tommy. 

Eddie had told him to stay busy and keep his mind off of it. To not reach out to Tommy. 

So, he focused on making himself dinner that night and after the lasagna was in the oven, he decided he may as well go out and eat all his feelings. Not to mention that he really wanted brownies. 

So, he found an outlet. Baking was better than crying. It was better than having to hide his phone from himself so that by the time he found it he’d be over the urge to call or text. 

Buck had almost convinced himself that he could keep going and that he wouldn’t cry over Tommy again, but he was crying again. Over Tommy. Over the break up. Over the tiny life that should have brought so much joy to both of them. Not that Buck wasn’t happy…not that the idea of being a dad didn’t excite him. It was just the timing and the circumstances. Tommy wasn’t there with him and Buck…

He needed to tell him. 

Tommy needed to know. 

Or maybe…maybe Buck could do it on his own. He could love this baby more than enough. Tommy had already made his choice on Buck, why would he come back just because Buck was pregnant. Buck wasn’t enough for him, the future that Buck wanted and that Buck had dangled in front of himself had been shot down without his say and this was not going to change anything, not if Tommy had thought their six months together was some fun and nothing further than that. 

A baby was…it was a big commitment. Eighteen years at least and it wasn’t about Buck, but the idea that Tommy might not react well to the news…

But, no, that was unfair. Tommy would at least feel the obligation to his child even if it was detached, even if it was just monetary. He would do right by the baby even if they weren’t together anymore. That…that hurt. It was like a stab right to the chest. This was not the way it was supposed to be. 

He sobbed, wiped at his eyes but the tears kept coming. Maybe he didn’t tell him. Maybe he didn’t find out how Tommy would react and…

But no. 

If it was the other way around and Tommy found out he was pregnant and didn’t tell Buck, Buck would never forgive him. He had to tell him. 

Wiping at the last of his tears, Buck went to the kitchen to grab water. 

Four positive tests. He needed to get a doctor’s appointment to confirm and then prenatal vitamins? What else? Was his apartment even an okay place in which to raise a baby? With the stairs and the balcony and how his bedroom wasn’t even really a room. And then there was his job. How long could he keep working before it was too dangerous? Was it already dangerous? 

Buck thought about calling Maddie. She was pregnant herself and she could help but the thought of telling her and not Tommy. Of telling anyone but Tommy…

He had to tell him. Buck reached for his phone. 

He couldn’t tell him over the phone and the thought of Tommy not picking up his call or leaving him on read or…what if he’d blocked Buck’s number? But no…Tommy wouldn’t do that. 

It was a Tuesday and Tommy didn’t usually work on Tuesdays. Unless he’d changed things…unless he’d been called into a fire. It didn’t mean he’d be at home, but it couldn’t hurt to try. 

So, he got shoes on, stuffed his phone and wallet in his pocket and grabbed his keys. Grabbed a few loaves out of his fridge for good measure. The remaining brownie pan too. 

Buck almost talked himself out of it on the drive over, but then he was pulling into Tommy’s driveway behind his truck. He waited a few more minutes before he got out of the car and started walking to the door. He raised his hand and knocked. 

Tommy had given him a key. It was still sitting next to the keys to his apartment. If this went badly, he supposed that he could give the key back. It would really be over, not that it hadn’t before. It was just that a part of Buck had hoped that if given enough time they might find each other again. It was silly and maybe it spoke to how many romcoms he and Tommy had watched together. Now…now he was pregnant and it changed everything. 

He knocked again. 

Heard movement from inside and then the door opened. 

Tommy looked like he hadn’t slept in days. 

“Buck,” he said. 

Buck decided to ignore that. “We need to talk,” he said. 

“I — yeah, sure.” 

Tommy stepped aside and Buck followed him in. 

“Do you…do you want a drink?” Tommy asked. 

The awkward energy between them killed him. It had never been like this between them before…okay, maybe after Buck messed up their first date, but even then it hadn’t been this. Buck shook his head. 

“What is all that?” 

“Oh. I, uh, I started baking and…anyway, these are for you.” 

Tommy took them and walked them into the kitchen. Buck followed. Nothing had changed since he’d been there last and the thought it might have and that Tommy could have moved on or something. Three weeks…it had really only been three weeks long as that felt. 

“What did you want to talk about?” Tommy asked, not even looking at Buck. 

How did he say it? Did he just blurt it out? On the drive over nothing had come to mind and Buck had never not known how to just say things except this time it was…it was so much harder. 

“Ev—Buck?” 

“I — I’m…I have some news.” 

“News?” 

The words got caught in his throat.

“Buck, is everything alright?” 

“I’m going to…pregnant. Maddie’s pregnant.” 

“Oh.” Tommy said with a confused chuckle. “You’re becoming an uncle again.” 

And a dad. 

Buck gulped. “Yeah. I am.” 

Tommy still looked confused. 

“I found out by accident. They don’t want anyone to know, but I had to tell someone. Don’t say anything.”

“Is that all?” Tommy asked, cautiously. 

Buck wanted to shake his head and to tell him it wasn’t only Maddie. It was Buck too. 

“We never talked about kids,” he found himself saying instead. “Among other things, but I never asked if you wanted kids. Do you?” 

It felt pointed. It felt like Buck was giving himself away. Tommy seemed a little confused. 

“Uh…I don’t know,” he settled on. “Never thought I would have any, but it’s not like I don’t like children. I guess I never really thought it was a real option or a deal breaker. Why are we talking about kids?”

“I’m…I don’t know. Just a thought,” Buck said. “I’ve always wanted to be a dad.”

“You want family,” Tommy said. “You'll get another niece or nephew soon.”

“Yeah,” Buck breathed and it took everything in him not to touch his stomach. Not just a niece or nephew, a son or daughter. Tommy’s too. 

“Did you…was there anything else?” Tommy asked. 

“I — that is—”

“Evan?” Tommy said. “You’re…are you alright?” 

He took a breath. “It doesn’t have to change anything,” he said. “I know you don’t want it to. You made that pretty clear. This isn’t like me trapping you or anything. I’m not. I just know that if it were the other way around I’d want to know and I’d want you to tell me. And no one else knows because you should be the first to know even though you kinda broke my heart there and that’s not going away. You know my fridge is full of loaves. I needed an outlet and so I started baking and I can’t seem to stop. I’m—”

“Evan, take a breath,” Tommy said. 

Buck did. He took several and when he looked at Tommy again, he found concern in his gaze. 

“What’s going on?” 

“I’m…well, as it turns out, I’m—” he couldn’t get the words out. 

“Are you sick? What’s happening? Evan, are you alright?” 

Tommy’s hand reached out to him, but fell short and drew back. 

“I’m not sick,” Buck said. “That’s not…I mean, that’s not what I would call this. I’m…Tommy, I’m pregnant.” 

Once the words were out, he felt lighter. His hand had drifted back down over his abdomen. Still flat, but for how long? When would he start showing? Hell, Buck didn’t even know how far along he was or anything else. 

Tommy was staring at his hand and then his eyes flickered back to Buck’s face. 

“Pregnant,” Tommy said. 

Buck nodded. 

“You’re a carrier. You never said.” 

“Yeah…I didn’t know until…until now.”

Tommy inhaled a breath and Buck could see that his mind was spinning, that he maybe didn’t even know what to say or think and Buck…Buck needed to leave. He’d told him, it was what he’d come to do and that was it. 

“I just wanted you to know. No obligation. No expectations. Just…that’s what’s happening. I’m pregnant and I’m going to keep it.” 

Tommy didn’t say anything. 

“I guess now you know. I’ll…I’ll go. See you around, Tommy.” 

Buck made it to the door. He was turning the doorknob and trying to pretend that his eyes weren’t filling up with tears when he heard a gentle:

“Wait.” 

And then Tommy’s hand was on his wrist and Buck turned. 

Tommy’s hand left his wrist but then he was cradling Buck’s face, thumbs wiping away his tears. 

“I was scared,” Tommy said. 

“Scared? You? But that’s, what is there for you to be scared of? I’m the pregnant one.”  

Tommy’s hands dropped from his face. “That,” he said. “You think I can’t be scared in this?” He motioned between them. “That it didn’t freak me out the moment you asked me to move in with you in the same sentence that you said you liked me for my confidence without even—”

Buck watched him. Watched the way that his shoulders were hunched and how he gulped. 

“You don’t see me, Evan, and if you don’t see me…the real me and not whoever you’ve made me out to be then this was never going to work. The moment I realized it wasn’t…that it wasn’t. I did this for you and for me. And now—” Tommy’s gaze met Buck’s dead on, “now you’re pregnant.” 

“I don’t see you?” Buck asked. 

He stepped away from the door. He laughed and turned away from Tommy before he looked back at him. 

“I see what you’ve let me see,” Buck said. “I see who you presented yourself to be and if you’re telling me now that you were lying about who you are then…then that’s—”

“It’s not what I’m saying,” Tommy broke in. “I’m saying you put me on some…on some pedestal that I don’t belong on. I’ve hurt people. Abby. Hen. Chim. Hid my sexuality to my own detriment and the detriment of others. I lied and lied and lied and…and it’s—”

Buck reached for him, grabbed his hand and made Tommy look at him. “You did it because you were protecting yourself from a world that wasn’t going to accept you. What I admire is how far you’ve come. What I admire is that you lived through it got to this side of it and can choose to be happy. Except that you don’t think you deserve it. I see you, Tommy.”

“Evan,” Tommy said. 

Buck grasped Tommy’s other hand. 

“Did you know I hate the way you leave your clothes in piles instead of putting them in your hamper, the way that you always forget to put the cap back on the toothpaste. You never close a cabinet. Some of your jokes are not funny and it shouldn’t have taken six months for you to tell me about Abby. I guess I’m to blame for that too because I didn’t tell you about her either. I hate how you never talked about Gerrard with me, not really. I hate the way you always take Eddie’s side and that the two of you always make fun of me. The first sign of trouble and you run. You’re not perfect, Thomas. But you know what, I love you anyway.”

The silence that fell between them lasted a few beats. They couldn’t look away from each other and there were tears slipping out of the corners of his eyes. 

“You scare me,” Tommy said, voice rough. “And I’ve been kicking myself since that night but I didn’t know…I couldn’t call or text because I walked away and I thought it was for the best. I’m broken, Evan, and if you ever saw that and didn’t — didn’t—” Tommy’s voice broke. 

“I love you,” Buck said. “And you’re not broken, because if you are then I am too.” 

Tommy actually let out a sob and his face crumpled. Buck had never seen him like that. He’d seen him worried and smiling and confused. He’d seen the way that his lips turned down that night when they broke up, but he’d never seen this. The way that the wrinkles around his eyes were deepened and his mouth was so turned down and how red it made his skin. 

Buck reached for him, pulled Tommy’s face down to his neck. He rubbed at his back and then ran a hand through his hair and Tommy sobbed and wet his shoulder with his tears and Buck held him and cried his own tears. It felt amazing to actually have Tommy in his arms, though the rest of it…the tears and the sobs was new. 

There was no knowing how long they stood there, until Tommy pulled back, wiping at his face with one hand. He didn’t go far, though Buck could tell that maybe he wanted to. When he finally looked at Buck, he looked a little more put together. 

“You’re pregnant,” he said. 

Tommy’s hand fell to Buck’s abdomen. There was nothing to feel there yet. They both knew that, but Buck put his hand over Tommy’s. 

“I am,” Buck said. “It doesn’t have to change anything.” 

Tommy let out a strangled laugh. “It’s going to change some things. Evan, you’re going to be the best dad.” 

“So are you,” Buck said and inhaled. “Right? I mean, you don’t have to be if you don’t—”

“I want to be,” Tommy said. “I don’t know how good I’ll be at it, it’s not like I had a great example. What I do know is that I am so in love with you and there is no way I’m letting you do this on your own. No way that I am walking away from you or this baby.”

Buck kissed him and Tommy responded at once, hungrily and like he was hoping to impart upon Buck every bit of his love through that kiss. 

They probably had a lot more to talk about. So much to figure out about them and about the baby. Buck could see more tears and more arguments, but if there was one thing that he could count on, it was that they would make it through it. They’d made it through this break up already any other hurdles or hardships could be dealt with. 

[imtryingbuck]

Two

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x fem!Reader

Summary: Y/n L/n becomes Queen of Astoria not that she wanted to. Prince James of Winterfeld meets her and falls in love.

Word count: 1,893

Warnings: angst. fluff. mentions of being barren. mentions of hunting.

Masterlist   Series Masterlist

Sitting in the chair that her father had been sitting in only two months prior with a crown sitting upon her head that she was surprised her neck had not yet broke with the weight of the thing, she tried not to wince at the pinching of the corset.

She had been crowned as the rightful heir to the throne and was now Queen. The whole hall erupted into cheers and chants, “Long live the Queen” and “The warrior Queen” hit her ears as she sat with her back straight. The knights all bent their knee to her - Carlson in front of them all, smiling up at her as he pledged his allegiance to her. She saw the scowl coming from Sir Jon as he nursed his ale, she smiled at him just to piss him off a little extra.

The celebration was loud with music and chatter from those in the hall, the smell in the air was intoxicating with food and ale - a lot of that was going to the floor as the guests danced. Everyone including her mother, sisters and Carlson were laughing and dancing, celebrating their new Queen. 

But Y/n, she just couldn’t find it in herself to join in the festivities she just wanted to be left alone or preferably in the woods training with Carlson and some of the other men, or better yet she wished that she was far away from the kingdom as she could possibly get. Looking around slowly making sure no eyes were on her as they were to busy dancing and having conversations amongst themselves, she stood and walked out of the side door. She found herself out in the private courtyard that only her family were allowed to be in, she took the crown off releasing a content and relieved sigh. The cold air soothed the ache of her chest as she looked up to the darkened sky smiling as the stars twinkled.

“Should have known you were going to try and run away. Ah, see you do not startle easily anymore.”

“I could smell you before I heard your boring voice.” She replied still staring up at the stars. “And do you see me running? The answer is no.”

“Listen here, you should have respect for your elders-“ he barked as he moved closer to her.

“I am not the same thirteen year old who was terrified of you, matter of fact I am more scared of a butterfly than I am of you.”

“You should not even be queen!”

Turning to face the man she had known all her life, the man who taught her how to play chess, the same man who would sneak some extra cake slices onto her plate when her parents weren’t watching. “Why shouldn’t I? I am the first born, my father never had a son, so why should I not be queen?”

“You are rotten. You are a barren bitch, what use are you if you cannot have an heir? You are best to work in the whore house-“

“Along with your mistress? I would rather not hear how dull you are at sex, thank you.”

“Y-you have no idea what you are talking about!”

“No? Red head, big tits, pretty face? A stark contrast from your wife, I must say.”

“Rotten you are-“

“So you have already said.”

“Barren bitch whose only deeming qualities lay on the battle field.”

“Again, you already called me that and also a battle field you have not seen in so many years, too busy hiding behind my father. And may I remind you of who you are talking to? I am the Queen, do not like that fact? Go and jump off the cliff, I will be sure to keep your wife and mistress safe and looked after.”

“You-you- wh-“

“You are embarrassing yourself now. You keep forgetting your station and I will end up removing more than your tongue. Do you understand?”

“Yes.”

“Yes, what?”

“Yes… my Queen.”

“Very good. Run along and leave me in peace.”

“What happened to you? The little girl I knew was nice, sweet and had a heart of gold. Where did that little girl go?” Jon asked her with his hand on the door knob.

“She died the moment you dragged her off that boat. Goodnight Jon.”

Hearing the door slam close she gulped a large breath of air, trying her hardest to keep her heart rate down. She wasn’t scared of him but she did know how dangerous he could be, she had seen it with her own two eyes. When Y/n was younger she use to sit upon a tree stump with her knees pulled up to her chest and watched in fascination as Jon trained the other warriors, she watched in awe of how fast he was though he had years added on to those he was training. And although Jon was friendly and sweet to her she had seen him do things that gave her nightmares or would be afraid to go near him for a few days after. The Jon that stood in front of her just then, calling her those names, wasn’t the same man she had grown up with.

She didn’t know why he was so against something that she didn’t even ask for, he should have taken it out on her father and not her.

“Jon said I could find you here, old man is too busy drowning his sorrows in the corner- hey what is wrong?”

“Nothing. Go back and enjoy your night. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“You are freezing, come back inside Y/n/n.”

“Would you marry Anna?” She asked changing the subject.

“No. She’s a pretty girl but I do not view her in that way, why?”

“What about my other sisters?”

“No Y/n, what is going on?”

“If you married my sister I could abdicate from the throne and hand it over to you two, and then the kingdom would have a King and a Queen that would have heirs and I could leave and I-I could be happy, I could be free.”

Carlson stood there frozen listening to his friends words, he had half a mind to go back into the hall and attack Jon knowing for sure that he had said something to her for her to be thinking of such things. “You will find a husband of your choosing, hopefully it would be a marriage of love and have your own child-“

“I cannot have them and you know that.”

“You do not know that though. Your father told you that when you was a child Y/n, he was wrong about many of things - he is wrong about this too.”

“I will find a suitable prince for one of the girls-“

“Y/n-“

“I do not want this life Carlson, I never have. And I am not ashamed to admit that I am scared.”

Wrapping his arms around her and pulling her into him, he whispered. “I know. I know you do not want this but I believe in you, I know you will be the best Queen anyone will ever know. I am sorry but this is your life, and please know I will be right by your side every step of the way. I will not allow you to fail or to fall, this I swear to you.”

For the first time since she was sixteen years of age when she was made to take part of the annual hunt and forced by her father to take the life of an innocent deer, she cried. Gripping tightly of Carlson’s shirt she let everything go, the loss of her life, the loss of her fathers life, her stepmother life ending so soon, the unfairness of the life she had to live when she did not want it. She cried and cried until there was nothing left for her to give.

“Queen Y/n.” Her personal servant bowed as the young girl entered her chambers.

“Larissa, how are you?”

“I-I am very well my queen, how are you?”

“Good, have you eaten today?”

“I have not but-“

“Come sit with me, and enjoy some food. I fear the cooks have given me more than enough.” She sees the hesitation in the young girl’s movements, Y/n pushes a chair out and pats on the seat giving her an encouraging smile.

“Th-thank you my Grace.”

“Do not need to thank me, eat as much as you can”

Larissa was not use to this. She thought at first that she was to be the tester to make sure no one had tried to poison the queen, finding herself frowning when Y/n digs into the food before she does. Larissa had always admired Y/n growing up, always finding herself smiling then she would hear the Princess laughing, when she would have the duty to collect herbs from the woods she would see Y/n fighting against men who were bigger in height and weight to her and would always silently cheer on the Princess and finding herself chuckling to herself when she would win against her opponents. Never in her life did she think she would be handpicked to serve her queen directly, and now here she was eating a breakfast fit for royalty, answering questions that Y/n asked, mind and heart racing as her queen actually paid attention to her words.

The bubble burst for the two of them when a knock came from the door, Larissa goes to stand up but Y/n’s hand came into contact with her arm, “it’s okay. Come in.”

“My Queen.”

“Mother, how are you? Would you like to join me and Larissa to eat? There’s plenty to go around.”

“I have already eaten, but thank you.”

“Your loss. What is it?”

“I need to speak to you, privately, please.” Larissa nods and stands, bowing to the two women she leaves quickly.

“What is wrong?”

Y/n watched as her mother take the seat that Larissa had been occupying, her fingers tugging at the flow of her dress - something she tended to do when she was nervous. A habit she herself had taken up. “Please, please do not be mad.”

“What has happened?”

“Y/n, you need a husband and you know it. You need an heir and that is just how it is, you need to marry in order to have them.”

“Mother, you know-“

“Your father was being a foolish angry man, he did not mean it.”

“But what is he was? What if I am barren and I cannot give my husband what is required of me? I do not, no, I know I cannot go through what you went through. I will not do it, it is not fair on me, the man or the other woman. Please mother, please just drop this. I will figure something out.”

There was a deafening silence that followed her words, mother and daughter just staring at each other waiting for someone to speak. Y/n truly wished she had just bid farewell and left her own chambers to go and train with Carlson even though she knew she had other obligations to attend.

Her mother smiled sadly at her and whispered the words that Y/n had been dreading to hear ever since she was a child.

“I have found you a husband.”

<Previous   Next>

Tags: @sapphirebarnes | @sebastians-love | @sidraaaaaaaaa | @mrsnikstan | @barnesxstan | @hi172826 | @alexdarkacademia | @supraveng

[circeyoru]

Gone Too Young = Collab

[Human & Demon!Alastor x Male BFF!Reader] - Platonic

Part 1 (here) — Part 2 — Part 3 — Part 4

I am SO excited to share this story with everyone! It’s like a first (successful) collab for me, very accidental start but love the progress we had! (hopefully not the end) There’s gonna be more parts to this. 

You don’t recall your parents. You knew you had them but their faces were blurry. All you remember was darkness, then there was warmth around you and voices so soft and caring that was directed at you. Your hands reached out and held something, it was warm too. Looking back, it was your small child form grabbing onto whatever affection sent your way

At the orphanage, you were one of the eldest. As a big brother, you cared for the little ones and the abandoned. You would wake up early then help set up breakfast with everyone and clean a little, after that it was school time, do a bit of helping out in town here and there for some food or penny or anything, then return home to where your brothers and sisters were waiting

It was a normal day at school where you were surrounded by friends that didn’t care about your orphaned background, friends you were grateful for. Just as they left early to grab a good spot for your lunch break, you stayed behind to help the teacher organize the homework that was handed in a messy pile

When you were done, you took your paper bag with your lunch sandwich inside and headed to your usual spot that you knew your friends were waiting for, as you saw them waving from the windows. You wanted to wave back, but your head turned in another direction to sounds of shoving and muffled hits. Your eyes widened at the sight. A group of bullies ganging up on someone smaller and weaker

“Hey!” Your serene and carefree expression turned to a scowl, taking heavy steps to the group. “What do you think you’re doing to him!?”

The bullies waved you off, threatening to hit you if you interfered. Even if you were the popular kid and liked by the teachers, you should not be sticking your neck in others’ business. Your eyes turned to the boy on the floor, even though his head was tilted down and his hair covering his eyes, you knew he was looking back at you with plead

You didn’t say anything and left the scene, ignoring how the bullies laughed and taunted the boy even more, saying that no one was going to help him. You returned quickly, this time with the disciplinary teacher next to you. You pointed at the group of bullies and told everything, coming to the boy’s aid to have him stand instead of staying on the floor

As soon as the teacher brought the group away to punish them, you brought the boy to the nurse’s office. In silence, you cared for the boy’s wounds on his exposed arms and legs. You noted him flinching with each touch and figured he wasn’t one for physical touch, so you made quick work. This scene was so familiar to you. When you were smaller, you wanted to help and got hurt then the staff would scold you while tending to your wounds, now you were caring for your little brothers and sisters in case they got hurt

“I would have helped you earlier, but it was better to get a teacher. Sorry for leaving you.” You apologized, you had noticed the newer wounds that weren’t there when you first saw him. He shook his head. Shy, you observed. You whacked your head around as you tried to remember which class and level he was from. Oh, that quiet kid at the back corner. “You’re… Alastor?”

The boy, Alastor, nodded. Before you could continued, the nurse door opened and your friends were rushing in. All asking you question after question, showing their concern to you after seeing what happened in the hallways from the outside. You reassured them you were fine, even introducing Alastor to the group

So began a wonderful friendship

To you, Alastor was like a hidden gem, he shined so brightly under the right conditions. He had a nack for speech, he was comfortable with expressing himself through art. He was even a fast running and knew all sorts of interesting facts about the forest near town because he frequents there

Everyone took a liking to Alastor just as they did you. Most would even joke that if one of you were a girl, then the two of you would be the perfect couple. You and Alastor both laughed it off, seeing it as silly

Though you did notice how Alastor was more clingy and close towards you. Sure the two of you were surrounded with friends and by now the two of you were the popular kids, but there was this unspoken close friendship that the two of you share. It was a good feeling, a form of affection that was only between the two of you

“I want to be the town mayor! Oh, or a doctor! Or a lawyer! They make so much money! When I do, I can give it all to the orphanage and get everyone a new place to live and new clothes to change too! Wait, but doctors and lawyers need to read alot… I prefer working, those are easier…” You paced around, your hands waving all over the place as you thought it over, the blank piece of paper flying around at each of your wave

Alastor chuckled, watching you with a soft smile while leaning against the tree. His own blank white sheet of paper next to him with two pens. “You can only pick the one job, silly. And you don’t have to think hard anyways, it’s just school work.”

You turned back to him, glaring down at him with a pair of narrowed eyes. “Well, I’m not wasting time thinking later! I want to help out now! Everyone takes care of me, I want to do something too.”

“But you are doing ‘something’, you’re the only kid that help out this much and not play.” Alastor noted out, rolling his eyes. He groaned as he slide down a bit, “I’m just gonna write whatever comes to mind, a hunter maybe? Or librarian? Something… I don’t know.”

When he looked up, his gaze was immediately met with yours, deep in thought. “Why not a radio host?” Alastor blinded, wondering why silently. “Did you know? You enjoy the spotlight and you strive in it. Plus your voice has this… Uhh… allure? That the right word? Yeah. Allure to it. I think you can hook anyone listening to your attention.”

It was Alastor’s turn to think as he mumbled, “A radio host. I don’t know. It’s a big deal and everyone listens to the radio.”

You sat next to him, careful to avoid getting into his comfort zone. But you don’t notice him shifting closer as you waved your hand once more while talking. “Exactly! I think you’re perfect for the job, just think Alastor, New Orleans’ new rising radio host! Loved and envy by all the enchanted listeners!” You smirked at your friend, “Has a nice ring to it, yeah?”

Alastor though it over again and shrugged, saying that he wouldn’t be able to make it anyways. Your chatting was cut short when the homeroom teacher came over the whack you both on the heads, lightly scolding you two to work on your assignments and not chat

The teacher even brought you away from Alastor to another tree so you wouldn’t interrupt him and he wouldn’t sidetrack you. You sat under your tree glaring at the piece of paper before asking the teacher if you could write a list of jobs you wanna do instead of doing just one, the teacher denied your request and firmly told you to pick one

All the while you were negotiating with the teacher, you didn’t catch Alastor giggling to himself at your childishness. He looked down at his paper and took the pen, in a neat cursive, he wrote, “Radio Host. The best in the state.”

Note: So this is labelled as collab cause ideas were joint and discussed~ Plotline and what to write has been decided, I just need to write them out in more detail.

My lovely collaborator is @blubugg13

Circe Y.

Taglist: (if you want to be added, specify if you want to be tagged for this series only or all my works)

@aconfusedwonderland

[h3yl4dies]

❀ 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐦 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐬/𝐨 𝐠𝐨𝐭 𝐡𝐢𝐭 𝐛𝐲 𝐚 𝐝𝐞𝐦𝐨𝐧!

𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬 : 𝐊𝐨𝐜𝐡𝐨 𝐒𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐨𝐛𝐮, 𝐌𝐮𝐢𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐨 𝐓𝐨𝐤𝐢𝐭𝐨 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐌𝐢𝐭𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐢 𝐊𝐚𝐧𝐫𝐨𝐣𝐢!

𝐓𝐲𝐩𝐞 : 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬!

𝐒𝐦𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐦𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐚𝐠𝐞 : 𝐈 𝐦𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐝𝐨 𝐚 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐭𝐰𝐨, 𝐢𝐟 𝐈 𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐈 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐨𝐰!

𝐖𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐞𝐞 𝐦𝐲 𝐝𝐞𝐦𝐨𝐧 𝐬𝐥𝐚𝐲𝐞𝐫 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭? 𝐇𝐞𝐫𝐞!

𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆 : mentions of blood and mentions of death, if you find this disturbing please don't read! Thank u!

✿ 𝐌𝐔𝐈𝐂𝐇𝐈𝐑𝐎 𝐓𝐎𝐊𝐈𝐓𝐎

- he actually didn't expected that

- the attack was way too fast, he couldn't catch the movements with his own eyes

- he didn't knew what to really do at this point, he was too scared.

- "Y/n! Are you alright?.. Where did he hit you?.."

- he hated the smell of your blood, it just pisses him off so much

- the anger he hide was finally uncovering

- with no hesitation, he ran and flashed onto the demon and snapped their head off

- when he was done with his business, he ran up to you and quickly ripped a part of his clothing to bandage your wounds

- "help is on the way y/n, please handle this for a little while.. I don't want to lose you"

- he was tearing up a bit

- after the mission, he was laying on the bed with you as the nurses tried to tell him to get out to let you recover but he couldn't. He just can't leave you alone.

- it took a few months for you to wake up and recover fully again.

- when you woke up, he hugged you tightly, resisting to even let you go

- "I am happy your awake y/n but please be careful next time. "

- he cares for you but doesn't really want to show it..

- my poor air-headed baby 😭..

- when you were still recovering, he would visit you almost everyday, sometimes when he's too busy.. He would also try to make some time so he can visit you, almost not missing a single day of visiting you

- when he follows you in a mission, he would be more cautious and aware of any attacks harming his s/o

✿ 𝐌𝐈𝐓𝐒𝐔𝐑𝐈 𝐊𝐀𝐍𝐑𝐎𝐉𝐈

- she was actually so scared

- as soon as she saw you laying on the floor bleeding, she shouted and screamed with tears.

- "Y/N!!!! WHAT HAPPENED-"

- she was already crying at that time

- how?

- how could she?

- how could she not notice you already bleeding and is on the edge of death on the floor?

- she couldn't and I mean COULDN'T. stop blaming herself for not noticing earlier

- she was actually so scared she was trembling, her legs were trembling and could barely stand

- she couldn't even stand the sight of her lover being on he floor bleeding

- she even couldn't look and stare at the demon. The demon who hurted her s/o

- but she did. She faced the demon and slashed the demons head off for you.

- as the demons head was fading away, she quickly flashed to you and hugged you tightly

- "y/n.. Please don't leave.. Me!! I can't let you die.. Without me! Please.. Wake up! WAKE UP! "

- time passed, you couldn't answer her. The wound was so painful that you passed out. Making her concern more..

- when the people arrived, mitsuri begged. BEGGED them to do something quickly before you left her.

- after months, you woke up on a comfy bed with bandages all over your body.

- but.. Someone was beside you crying.

- it was mitsuri. As soon as she saw you awake she bursted into joyful tears as she hugged you tightly

- "Y/N YOUR AWAKE!! THANK GOD I LOVE YOU SO SO MUCH YOU DON'T EVEN UNDERSTAND!! You actually scared me that time! Please.. Don't make yourself bleeding on the floor in front of my eyes again.. I can't.. Take it.. "

- why do I feel guilty writing this

- oh well, onto the next one!

✿ 𝐊𝐎𝐂𝐇𝐎 𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐎𝐁𝐔

- same as muichiro, she didn't expected that either. She was actually confused

- the death of her sister already stressed and frustrated her more, now it's her s/o?

- what can she do without you and her sister? Both of you were her everything..

- anger.

- yes. Anger was the only thing that came right up into her mind as soon as she saw te demons face.

- "what is wrong with you? What did we ever do to you? if you wanted to hurt someone. It should had been me. "

- she ran out of energy, she couldn't take it anymore and quickly used one of her deadliest poison ever

- it was so disgusting. The sight of her s/o bleeding. The sight of the demons ugly face. The sight of the blood

- everything was bothering her.

- the anger couldn't handle.

- and yet, she still tries to keep a gentle smile on her pleasant face.

- but.. She couldn't.

- she quickly jumped on you and wrapped the bleeding wound with her haori.

- "there, it should be stopping it from bleeding. "

- don't worry, she would also inject a syringe in your blood to make sure there isn't infections

- " hold on dear, this might hurt a bit but it's for the best. "

- as soon as the people arrived, shinobu angerily told them to take care of you

- she would NOT. allow someone to take her s/o away from her. Never.

- it took a few months for you to get back on your feet again. And when you did, shinobu was finally no longer stressed

- calmness and reliveness had come into her.

- she was so relived you were alive.

- she believed love in you

- "your finally back. I missed you. "

- she gave you a gentle small hug and her smile were wider.

- I swear she deserves a happy ending 😭!

Note : 𝐡𝐞𝐲! 𝐈 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞𝐧'𝐭 𝐝𝐢𝐝 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐭𝐰𝐨 𝐲𝐞𝐭 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐦𝐚𝐲𝐛𝐞 𝐈 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥? 𝐌𝐚𝐲𝐛𝐞 𝐈 𝐰𝐨𝐧'𝐭? 𝐈𝐝𝐤!! 𝐁𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐤𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠! 𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐬𝐨 𝐛𝐨𝐫𝐞𝐝 𝐬𝐨 𝐈 𝐝𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐞 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬 (𝐡𝐨𝐩𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐞𝐧𝐣𝐨𝐲𝐞𝐝!) ♡♡♡

[trashmouth-richie]

master list

Eddie x fem! reader

⚠️ TRIGGER WARNINGS ⚠️

Absolutely no minors, gtfo. Hopefully everyone has read the warning post from earlier this week regarding this chapter. it is extremely dark themed.

Heavy violence

References to past rape/ assault

Blood, gore

Domestic violence

Somnaphilia

Character death etc

A/N: please know your limits. I love you and let’s get into this chapter so we can move on.

The brown popcorn bag spun lazily in the microwave like an oily inflating balloon. The steady hum of the appliance kept you company as the countdown to the sad supper ticked to an end. The cheerful ding springing you from the staring contest you were having with the counter top. 

  The small radio you had purchased was sitting on the counter, the soft belt of Linger by The Cranberries was playing for what seemed like the tenth time today and you couldn’t help but feel the lyrics in your blood. 

  Unaware of anything out of the ordinary. A typical night after working at the bar. Showering and throwing on a pair of pajama shorts, tucked next to the pair of Eddie’s boxer briefs you had found last week. 

  After investigating why the washer banged all to hell when even the smallest of loads were in it, wedged tight under the plastic agitator were his underwear. 

  And you’d be a fool to say you hadn’t broken down and sobbed in the basement on the discovery. 

  You dried them and folded them neatly next to your delicates. The same drawer that held the worn and tarnished pig ring he gave you as a Christmas gift, and the envelope full of cash. 

  The water works started again. 

  Hot tears flooding your eyes, the simple act made you feel like he was home with you. But the nightmare always continued.

  You missed him so much. 

  “But you always really knew

I just want to be with you

  If you were a tiny bit more awake you might have caught that the door to the garage was locked even though you had no memory of locking it yourself. 

  ..And I'm in so deep

You know I'm such a fool for you

You got me wrapped around your finger

  Rustling the steaming bag from the microwave with burnt finger tips, you toss it on the counter hastily. Sucking your fingers into your mouth to dull the stinging redness away.

  Do you have to let it linger?

  And maybe it was then that if you weren’t busy nursing the premature burns, you would have noticed the odd set of keys on the counter next to the mail, pushed to the side by the buttery bag of popcorn. 

  Do you have to, do you have to, do you have to let it linger?

  Bending at the waist to the lower cabinet you reach around for the smooth plastic of the yellow popcorn bowl. Upon standing you feel dizzy. You hear it before you feel it, the loud thwap of something heavy against the back of your head. The pain is searing and turns your vision to black. You’re passed out before your head even hits the floor. 

  (1987)

  The November air whipped into reddened skin, striking out any heat you had left in the confinements of the peach sweater you borrowed from Nancy on your frozen walk to Forest Hills Trailer Park. 

  It happened again. 

  And this time it wasn’t an accident, no matter how much he begged, no matter how many times he said he was sorry. 

  He hit you with a closed fist. 

  You weren’t flirting with Dustin. He was your friend. Way before Chad had taken any interest in you. Most of your friends were guys, besides El and Max, and even though Nancy Wheeler was older and more popular— you considered her a friend too. 

  When she left for college this past fall, she insisted on making her room more stylish to your liking. And she never once minded the twin beds you both slept in, a night stand between them. 

  But when Mike sat next to you at lunch and was going over notes from Kensington’s class, Chad’s mind twisted it into Mike hitting on you. Which led to Chad hitting on you, but instead of compliments and doting behavior— he drug you out to his car, a bony grip on the back of your neck.

  He screamed at you with every vein protruding from his tan skin. Voice hoarse and throat stretched tight. 

  Apparently you were fucking people behind his back. Even though you were a virgin. The town whore! He had yelled loud for even some of the teachers to hear, all turning a blind eye to the obvious domestic abuse happening on school grounds. 

  Explaining yourself only made it worse. 

  He slapped your face hard when you opened your mouth to interrupt him. And when you stood your ground and raised your chin to him, calm and steadily telling him to go fuck himself, he swung a fist into your eye. 

  And that’s when you left. 

  His apologies trailing behind you and caught in the gut of wind to travel far away from your ears. He wouldn’t follow you, he had appearances at school to keep up. 

  Much easier to tell Aaron and Sean that you got your period and were being crazy then explain why he had left school.

  The gravel crunched beneath your feet, frozen from the last winter storm and holding pockets of ice amongst the rocks. 

  Pale blue and still holding the old television lawn ornament, you sighed audible when Eddie’s van was parked outside of the aluminum sided trailer. 

  You hadn’t seen him since graduation last May. The night Chrissy’s extra curricular activities with Rick finally came out when they were caught fucking in the shower upstairs, at Steve’s house. Both sporting pricked arms with needle marks. 

  A broken hearted Eddie drank all night long and puked into the hot tub.

  Your quickened steps up to the concrete stairs and a shaky broken knock on the screen door have you stepping back waiting for the door to open, awaiting Eddie’s stupid grin waiting on the other side. 

-

  Living with Eddie you had no reason to be afraid. Many nights the front door was left unlocked. And maybe it was out of habit. Maybe you had left it unlatched tonight too. 

  It would explain how he was there now. 

  Hovering over you, his blond hair coined perfectly slicked to the side, slightly feathered back with thick styling gel. A Ralph Lauren polo with the logo on the left chest. His cologne reeked of some designer brand, making your stomach queasy.

  The only difference between those years ago and now was that he had a small dusting of a flesh colored mustache wiggled on his sweaty lip. Same maniacal inky blacks to his blown pupils, laced with the piercing blue. 

  The realization ices your veins and stings your eyes with angry tears. 

  Chad Cunningham was in your home, his body over yours as you're pinned beneath him, the smell of iron invading your nose. Looking around with wild eyes you see the crimson streaks from the linoleum in the kitchen to the carpet where you are laying. Your head thumping with the rhythm of bloody drops against the fibers of the worm carpet.

  “Been a long time hasn’t it, honey bun?” 

  An eternity wouldn’t have been enough. 

  Pressing his body into yours, you can feel the stiffness of his starched shirt as you try to will your arms to fight him away. He chuckles at your feeble attempts to push him off.

  His weight presses deeper into you as he lowers his mouth to your lips, squeezing your face he almost sings,  “Told you I’d see you soon.” 

  His lips are harshly planted into yours, feeling like jagged rocks against your soft waters.

  “Fuck,” he groans, hard against your thigh. “just like I remember. I’ve missed you.” 

  The clink of his belt unthreading from the loops of his khakis finally renders your senses. But you wait with calculated timing. 

  Leaning back, he stares into your face with a quizzical expression burrowed deep on his brow. “What’s the frown for? Don’t you miss me? Aren’t you happy to see me?” 

  Evident that his delusions still ran deep, it’s showtime. You would survive this. One good hit, that's all it would take. 

  Pushing yourself up gently, your head is swimming with nausea and the steady dripping tick of blood down the back of your neck. 

  Placing a shaky hand to his cheek he moves into your hand, the same way Eddie had that night, your stomach somersaults at the memory. 

  When his eyes shut, you turn your fingers into a clawed position, and scrape the flesh from the corner of his eye down to his lip. 

  It happens quickly and with your blurred vision and pounding head it feels like it’s all in slow motion. He wasn’t expecting it. 

  A kick to his ribs hurt your bare feet probably more than it injured him but you needed the extra time to escape into your room. 

  The phone feels cool against your cheek, and weighs heavy on your shoulder when you realize it’s dead. The plan of you running in here, dialing 9-1-1 and holding him off until they came was foiled. 

  “BITCH! You can’t hide from me!” 

  Knowing you only have seconds before he finds you, you 

frantically look around for something to defend yourself with. Searching eyes land on the window. 

  Just need to get out and run to Mr. Griffin’s house. 

  Fingers on the frame you yank upwards, palms digging into the wired screen, pushing it out.

  Throwing your leg out into the darkness of the night, you’re one step closer to being safe. One step closer to ending this night of horrors before it could begin. 

  The noise of splintering wood and the crack of a door being snapped from its hinges join your erratic breath and piercing screams— a monstrous reel of symphonic sound. 

  Chad twists a thick fist into your scalp, freeing the hair from its follicles in a sickening pop as you scratch your nails into the window sill, trying to hold on.

  He’s stronger than you, no different than years before. And when your body crumbles onto the floor with a squelching thud, splinters of lacquered wood and nails that once held the door in place, pierce into your exposed skin. 

  But that is minor league compared to the shattering pain delivered from his fist into your face as he straddles you.

  “Think you can hide away with that freak from me?!” He rocks his closed hand into your other cheek, this time clipping your eye with a gold wedding band.  

  Your cries fall on deaf ears. Tears stinging and trying to drip from your swelling eyelids. 

  “Honey bun,” he purrs into your ear, “don’t tell me you’re that fucking stupid to think I wouldn’t find you.”

  His fingers move to brush your hair from your face, and he holds your head in place when you try to bite at his fingers. 

  His wicked smile could make the devil’s scaly skin crawl. 

  “Such a dumb whore, forgetting I have eyes and ears all over this town.” Placing his grabby fingers on his breasts, he continues, “Aaron and Sean may not be the brightest candles on the cake but they are loyal.” 

  Aaron…Sean. 

  You rack your brain for any recollection of those names.  and it finally clicks. Chad’s friends in high school, following him around like he was the King. A snap of his fingers and they’d move like henchmen. Fighting anyone who got in his way, putting themselves at risk just to say they had a friend from a rich family. 

  The realization swims in your eyes and scares your tears dry. 

  “No.”

  “Pieced it together huh?” Chad laughs wildly. “They work..” he grunts, hips rutting against you, pinching your perked nipples in his tight grasp, his fingernails digging through your shirt around the delicate skin, making you squeal, “..with the freak!” 

  His deranged cackle doubles when you yell out in pain. 

  “Small town bosses don’t lock their offices, and it was too easy for Aaron to find your address, even easier to find out that Eddie had left your ass here, unguarded, alone, waiting for someone to save you, and honey bun here I am!” 

  His sick twisted smile oozes fear further into your gut, brooding and feeding on any small amount of joy you had left. 

  “You need a fucking psychiatrist.”

  “Such harsh words for that sweet mouth, but don’t worry!” he reassures, eyes wide with delight and a psychotic expression on his face as he brings his voice low and secret-like, “I won’t kill you yet, the boys are looking for Munson and when they find him…” he lowers himself to kiss your lips, sliding his tongue against the split flesh. 

  “Fuck!” He bellows, licking his lips savoring your taste on his tongue, “when they find him they’re gonna bring him here, and it’ll be arranged to look like the freak killed you and then himself.. a lover’s quarrel gone bad.” 

  He rubs his face and grunts again at the warbled wails you let out, squeezing your breasts and bucking into your clothed crotch. “Goddamn,” he groans, his eyes rolling into his head at the sound of your cries, getting off on your distorted face, “I just couldn’t help myself, had to come here and do this first. One last goodbye.”

  You’d rather be dead at this point. You wish he’d kill you now and get it over with. But the thought of Eddie seeing your lifeless body haunted you. And you stop crying when his hands close around the hollow of your throat. 

  “Gonna be mine, one last time honeybun?”

  “Fuck you,” you croak beneath his hands on your throat.

  You’re weak and running out of time. Rolling your tongue against your teeth and cheeks, harboring a mixture of saliva and blood you wait until Chad is leaning over you, and when he’s close enough you spit the concoction into his face.

  Chad bellers out, letting go of your throat and standing abruptly to wipe his face. The split second he’s distracted you try to crawl away, but he kicks you down. 

  Delivering several soccer styled strikes into your stomach, his voice spewing insults with every jab of his white Nikes into your body.

  A raging shock of fury paints his face.

  “What did I tell you hmm? If I can’t have you— no one can!” You scream loud when his shoe propels into your crotch, shocking your pelvis with burning heat. 

  All noise is void when he rolls you over and crashes down on your beaten body, clobbering your tear and blood streaked face, blow after blow.  Your eyes are swelling shut and you’re surprised when you see Eddie’s face, before your eyes shut. 

  It feels like home. 

  -1987-

  The warm smile you missed so much was not there to greet you. A cold calloused “what?” finds you instead. 

  “Eddie?” you ask with a scratchy throat, clearing it once, twice, to answer him against the wind. 

  Grumbling and stomping in the trailer is heard. Along with two separate giggles. 

  The door is yanked hard inward revealing a version of Eddie Munson you’d never seen before. His skin was sunken in on his cheeks, dark circles rimmed his eyes. His once soft features were sharp and lackluster, brooding with ashy shadows and skin that looked like it hadn’t seen sunlight in months. 

  He looked gaunt and hallowed out, his ribs poking against the cindery color of his skin. The warm whiskey eyes that once danced when he laughed were now gaping blacked marbled, polar and dull. 

  He speaks but you are too busy holding your breath from the stench of rotting clothes and unwashed bodies. 

  Stumbling over an apology for not hearing him, you are startled when he barks back,  “I said, what the fuck are you doing here, Tooty?” 

  You look to the floor and notice he’s wearing a heavily stained sock with a hole in the toe, the other foot bare, next to a pair of work boots are three pairs of women’s shoes:, heels, keds, and pink reeboks. Your toes wiggle in your worn converse. 

  “I’m.. I uh..” 

  Eddie rolls his eyes, “oh for fucks sake spit it out! You selling raffle tickets or something for school? Pep team need new Pom-poms? Or maybe the chess club is looking for a new board?” 

  Shock stealing your speech you stand on frigid feet digging your fingers into the yarn on the Nancy’s sweater. Tears bite your lashes and fall on cold cheeks. 

  Eddie! Where’s your lighter? A sultry voice coos, padding feet getting closer to the threshold. 

  “Listen kid, I’m fucking busy, I don’t have time to haul you around because twiddle dick and dum forgot you at the gas station again.” 

  He has barely looked at you since you got there. The guy who held more merit to you than your own brother was gone. 

  When you wipe your eyes on the sleeve of your sweater  he lets out an exaggerated groan. 

  He thrusts dirty fingers into his sweatpants pockets. Pulling out a perfectly rolled twenty dollar bill, he flattens it smooth. He smears his finger along the length of the bill, collecting remnants of a fine white powder, which is quickly shoved into his greedy mouth and rubbed on his gums like he’s brushing his teeth. 

  “Here,” he grunts, shoving the drugged money into your pocket, avoiding your eyes at all cost, “now get lost.” 

  The blinds on the door are still swinging as you stand there dumbstruck and watery eyed. Low voices are murmured through the thin walls as a lighter flicks and sizzles.

  Who was that baby? 

  Nobody. 

  And that’s exactly who you were to everyone you knew, nobody. 

  And ironically enough— that’s exactly who you could rely on. 

  One thing was for certain: Eddie Munson was a stranger to you. 

  The tears fell harder on the shameful walk back to Chad. But you weren’t sure if you were crying harder because of the sudden loss you felt from an old friend or because of the pain in your eye.  

-

  Heart hammering in his chest, Eddie jiggles the door handle, it’s locked and he panics and realizes he still has his key. Fumbling with the key ring, Eddie finds the short brass one and unlocks the door. 

  The sight of the mostly empty house is jarring, causing his stomach to drop , a small recliner rests in the living room where his couch once sat. Wine is spilled from the kitchen to the living room, smeared like it was swept poorly with a mop. 

  You never drank wine.

  Maybe you started drinking heavily after he left. He did. It only made sense. 

But a second glance at the claret colored stain embedded into the carpet and his worst fear was realized. 

  Blood.

  The sound of something wet and thwacking settles into his bones and shakes his spine. Someone was hurting you.

  Heavy docs lead him to the corner of the house, your room and his old room. Where his door was intact, yours was shattered. Like Jack Torrance took his ax to it in The Shining. Stepping on cracked wood, Eddie sees the most horrific thing he’s ever been a witness too. 

  And suddenly he’s six years old again, helpless. Watching a woman he loved lose a battle she didn’t even know she was in. But instead of his mother’s lifeless body crumbled by his father’s feet, instead of her dark curly hair matted with pooling blood and a gaping bullet hole— It’s you underneath a guy he doesn’t recognize.

  Your face is battered and covered in blood, the once plush lips he held so warmly between his own were split and slack. Your eyes were swollen, lacking any shine to them they normally held. 

  His eyes connect with yours for a brief second, and when they close he doesn’t know if they will open again. 

  Fury radiates through his entire body, masking the pain of heartache at the sight of you slipping from him. 

  Before he can acknowledge the thought of you being gone, he lunges at the catalog Dad dressed asshole. Knocking him off your body and landing on top of him, colliding into your dresser. The tangle of body parts wrestling for purchase tumble into the hall. Ringed fists land home on every surface of this guy's face, and when he stops to take a breath— he realizes the face he is hitting is Chad Cunningham’s.

  How did he find you? Had he been stalking you both since that day at the grocery store?

  Didn’t matter all that he cared about was throwing this mother fucker the biggest ass kicking of his life, and he wouldn’t stop until either Chad or himself was dead.

  “I’ve waited years for this day,” Chad spit, after getting a punch in when Eddie was in his own head, knocking Eddie’s jaw to bite down on his tongue, filling his mouth with blood immediately. “Trailer trash Munson finally came to play.”

  Taken by surprise, Chad shoves Eddie from him and stands up, looking through the doorway at your limp body. 

  Eddie stands slow, using the bathroom doorknob to help, he reaches for the knife kept in his back pocket. 

  Chad spins to face Eddie, his hair sweaty and face ballooning out from Eddie’s rings. “You should have left my girl alone Munson, would have saved your uncle the heartache.”

  Eddie flicks the blade open on the knife, grip tight around it, he breathes through his nose his throat tight and stretching around his words, his leather jacket creaking when he moves his neck around in a stretch, confident in his delivery, “she’s not yours.” 

  The hysterical laugh that leaves Chad’s lungs could resemble bats screeching in the night, he’d make a great clown in a haunted house. 

  “Dead or alive whether I’m married or not— she’ll always be mine.”

  Like alley cats, they stare each other down, waiting for the opportunity to pounce.

  Chad licks his lips and looks your way again, “listen, I get it, she’s hot. And that tight little pussy..” he licks his lips and grabs himself over his denim jeans, stained with your blood.

  Eddie’s blood is boiling, he’s seconds away from snapping but trying to hold it together long enough to make a perfect attack.

  Chad leans forward, gesturing a mockery secret with his hand held around his mouth, “It’s even better when she’s fighting you,” he inhales deep, like he’s wishing he was in a past memory, “screaming really tightens her right up.”

  Knife out, Eddie charges forward. And is struck dumb when the knife is kicked from his hand. Another kick this time to the chest that he wasn’t expecting sends him stumbling into the living room, air gone from his lungs. Chad follows and swings into his diaphragm making Eddie choke out on nothing, gasping for air. 

  “Oh come on, Munson,” Chad taunted, leaning down to kiss Eddie’s cheek, “Thought you would have some trailer park moves to throw at me.”

  Raising a heavy boot, Eddie stomps on Chad’s toes, and mule kicks his kneecaps. A ringed fist meets his cheek, adding another forming bruise to his winter tan skin. Shoving him backwards into the counter in the kitchen, the cabinet doors bust on the impact. 

  The punches Eddie is landing have his knuckles bloody and swelling but he doesn’t care. Each punch is a testament for the years you held yourself together, acted like nothing bad was going on, when in reality you were experiencing hell on Earth and he never knew. 

  This was his payback. His way of righting a wrong. A wrong that should have never even began.

  He doesn’t know what he was hit with just that he was stumbling backwards again. Temple throbbing and without reaching up he knows he’s bleeding. His back hitting the corner of the fridge he slides down onto the linoleum.

  His head is heavy and his vision blinded with hazy clouds of black and white. He hears Chad but doesn’t see him, just feels his head being slammed in the fridge and a grip in his hair. 

  “Could have saved your uncle funeral costs you stupid bastard… clearly you don’t care about him, or Tooty for that matter, leaving her all alone like that,” Chad sucks through his teeth, splitting blood onto Eddie’s shirt, “thought the raccoons usually stuck together.”

  He chuckles low and slams Eddie’s head one more time with such force it leaves a dent in the fridge. “Now if you’ll excuse me,” he says, straightening his shirt, walking towards your room , “my girl is waiting.”

  “Don’t touch her!” Eddie roars, pushing himself up to stand with all his might. Pounding head and nausea thick in his mouth. Raising his head he looks at Chad with blurry sight, trying to see clearly. His voice is low, catching his breath and taking all of his strength to utter out the words. Balancing around the mark of deranged, “I’ll fucking kill you.”  

  Chad swivels on his heels, head cocked at Eddie, he grabs under his chin holding it firmly in place. His breath fanning over Eddie’s cheeks and he smiles maniacally, blood painting his teeth. 

  “Don’t flatter yourself.” A heavy fist to the gut has Eddie doubled over. Gripping the counter with white knuckles and wet blood smeared fingertips. 

  He had failed again. He wasn’t able to stop his own father from killing his mother. And now Chad was on his way to desecrate your lifeless body. He’s a fuck up and a failure. 

  Always. 

  A low guttural choking sound breeches Eddie’s ears. And he turns to see you covered in your own blood, barely standing and wielding a bat with nails protruding from every which way. 

  The nails are claret colored and dripping thick drops onto the carpet, fibers of Chad’s jeans hang in shreds from the sharp edges. A scant look towards Eddie and your eyes swim with relief and mourning. 

  He’s here. Blood is smeared down his lips and his hands look tight and swollen. 

  But he’s alive. And so are you.

  Eddie’s vision is doubled and he blinks rapidly unaware if he is seeing you or not. He swallows hard and almost chokes on tears.

  But that is short lived.

  And it happens fast. 

  The yelling rage from Chad’s lungs over power your screams. His hands are tight around your throat before you can blink, your spine snapping into the nearest wall, feet dangling off the ground. 

  Haziness bleeds into your eyes and your breath is expelled from screaming— now gone when your windpipe is crushing like a pixie stick under Chad’s grip. 

  Desperate to fight back you jam your thumbs into his eyes. Victor Creel style like the Urban Legends passed down that you were told as kids. 

  If you were going to die, at least he would be blind, a forever reminder of this day etched, literally, into his face. 

  You prayed Eddie would know how much you loved him.  

  Should have’s taking over the last puffs of oxygen in your brain, popping like bubbles. 

  Should have told him sooner. 

  Should have said it every day. 

  Should have kissed him more. 

  Should have let him love you. 

  The guilt wraps around your mind as the cold hands of death welcome you. But you’re not afraid. Knowing Chad always kept good on his word, Eddie would join you in the afterlife.

  Hand in hand. 

  Strolling along the pinked cotton candy clouds and the pearly gates. 

  You are his and he is yours. 

  Lovers together finally at last. 

  The last breath on your lips is a silent devotion to him. 

  I love you, Eddie.

-

a/n: my asks are always open ♥️

[katyawriteswhump]

I hear your voice (and it carries me)

for @steddieangstyaugust day 17 prompt: 'Keep breathing, please."

Rating: M WC: 1700 CW Drug-use Tags: Established steddie, alternate canon season 4 (with details fudged and twisted for my own plotty purposes.)

What if Vecna came for Steve first, not Chrissy? (No actual death, I promise, just guilty-pleasure pop and major angst…)

...

Eddie climbed through the window that Dustin had left open and into Steve’s hospital room. His boots smacked too loud on the floor, and his every muscle tightened.

Steve was wired up to a series of bleeping machines. Plaster casts smothered three of his limbs. His neck was in a brace, and his face was half-lost beneath an oxygen mask.

Eddie knew, of course. Steve had arrived here in a far worse state than this. 

Still one helluva punch in the gut.

He tiptoed to the bed and located Steve’s Walkman, which had been dumped on a trolley. He slipped it back over Steve’s ears, careful not to disturb the mask. Dustin and Robin had played a showstopper in convincing Steve’s mom that Steve would want constant pop. 

Unfortunately, the medical staff kept taking the darn thing off.

Eddie didn’t switch the cassette on right away, however. He anxiously smoothed Steve’s hair.

“God, I’m sorry,” he said brokenly. “I panicked, Stevie. I was too fucking scared. I should’ve broken your fall, and I should never have let you… I… I shouldn’t have…” He pressed his lips to Steve’s cool, clammy brow. A fat tear dripped from his nose. “Keep breathing, Baby. Keep breathing, please.”

“CODE RED, I REPEAT THIS IS A CODE RED! EDDIE, DO YOU COPY?” 

Dustin’s yell blasted through Eddie’s walkie-talkie. Eddie scrambled to turn the volume down.

“Henderson, what the heck?”

“Eddie, the night nurse has started her rounds early. I repeat—she’s started her rounds early. You gotta get outta there NOW.”

…

One week earlier

Steve lay flat on his back on Eddie’s bed, shirtless, and with his jeans tangled round his knees. Eddie was sprawled on top of him—a smokin’ hot mess of sweat and hair—and kissing Steve stupid.

Steve should’ve been in a happy place. He was sucking Eddie’s face off, grinding himself up into Eddie, while Eddie pawed hungrily at his ass. Eddie wanted in, and Steve wanted nothing more than for Eddie to bone his brains out.

If only he could shake these stupid jitters.

Christ, the blood pounding in his ears drowned out the mega-loud Aerosmith track on his latest mixtape. He was also dog-tired, and sick of it. The nightmares had ruined his sleep for days.

And they were all total bull.

Yeah, Steve felt guilty about shit. Not only about Barb, though that was a biggie—there was so much he’d screwed up in his life. He sucked. He got it, blah, blah, blah.

No way was he buying into crazy hallucinations where Eddie yelled and hated on him. Let alone ones where Robin transformed into a squelchy tentacle monster. He was going out of his tiny mind. It was the only reasonable explanation, and the only answer right now was…

Eddie broke the kiss. “You okay, Babe? Still got a headache?”

“I’m fine.” Steve dabbed his lips, shivering because Eddie was too far away already. “I’ll be fine. Gimme more of the good stuff, okay?”

Eddie turned down the music. “Seriously? You mainlined poppers earlier—enough to lay low a daddy buffalo. That shit means business.”

“So I do. Stop being a freakin’ pussy.” Steve wedged his hand between Eddie’s thighs and purred. “I can totally handle it, and if I do turn to mush? Means I can take even more of this big boy.”

“I’m not sure, Stevie… Oh shiiiit.” 

Steve mercilessly squeezed Eddie’s dick, batted his lashes. Yeah, he’d beg if he had to. Anything to feel less tense and haunted, to feel he was actually in the room with Eddie. 

He never had to.

Eddie pulled a dopey face, started rummaging through his stuff. Steve dragged his jeans up with fumbling hands. He maxed out the stereo volume—snickering because Eddie was gonna literally piss himself when the track-after-next started—and wandered toward the kitchen to get more beer.

….

Eddie located a shoebox full of snazzy lil’ multicolor poppers and a sachet of Special K. Then his frazzled brain caught up with him.

He’s already had waaay too much. Okay, he’s still revved as fuck, but THAT’S NOT NORMAL.

He ditched the shoebox, grabbed a jar of Acetaminophen. After tipping all but two pills out, he peeled off the label. He’d tell Steve they were hardcore tranqs. Shifty, but… Screw it, he cared about Steve more than he’d ever cared about anyone. Yeah, Steve had bugged him for downers. Eddie should never have caved. He vowed, one way or another, he’d wean his boy off ’em.

He was, admittedly, launching his campaign the coward’s way. Had to start somewhere, right?

“There you go, Honey,” he said, wandering out. “Boneless bliss just moments away.”

Eddie stopped in his tracks. He dropped the jar. Steve stood motionless in the middle of the trailer. His eyes were lidded, twitchy with the occasional flash of white.

“Steve?” Eddie dashed forward, started shaking him. “Talk to me, Steve. Wake up! Can you hear me? I don’t like this, Stevie.”

Shit! He’s ODd already!

Eddie jostled him, pleaded with him. Right till the moment Steve levitated up into the air and smacked into the ceiling.

Eddie staggered back. The Black Sabbath track blasting from the stereo ended. Silence reigned.

One of Steve’s arms twisted the wrong way at the elbow and popped. Eddie screamed, then actually pinched himself, because this had to be a horrible dream, and then…

‘Ooh, baby, do you know what that's worth?

Ooh, Heaven is a place on Earth’

Belinda Carlilse. Belinda fucking Carlilse. Yeah, Steve loved to sneak pop-tastic hits onto his mixtapes. Eddie would always crack up, plus he didn’t hate them either.

One of Steve’s legs contorted with a sickening snap.

‘They say in Heaven, love comes first

We'll make Heaven a place on Earth…’

Steve’s eyes flashed from white to brown. He fell, landing with a horribly crunching smack.

In the blur of the next few minutes, Eddie called an ambulance. He leaned close over Steve’s blue-ish lips, sensed the faintest warmth, though didn’t dare touch him. His eyes bled. He looked so… broken. Eddie prayed to some WASP deity he’d never believed in that he was the one having a really bad trip.

He went with Steve in the ambulance and held his limp hand on the ride. They’d already got that mask on his face, the brace around his neck. At the hospital, Eddie watched Steve’s gurney disappear through swinging doors. He collapsed in the waiting room, buried his face in his hands.

Steve’s parents arrived soon after. They joined the doctors in bombarding Eddie with thunderous glares, until the truth finally glimmered.

They believe I did that to him.

Even if… WHEN… Steve wakes up, they’ll say we were both high as fucking kites. They’ll blame the satan-worshipping freakshow.

Convinced the cops were on their way, Eddie fled via a fire escape. While he was holed up at Reefer Ric’s, two teens were murdered. The whole town now believed Eddie was the monster behind those crimes, too.

“Way to go making a play for the FBI’s Most Wanted list,” Dustin said, when he brought Eddie supplies. “If you hadn’t run, those deaths would’ve got you off the hook. Not that you’re exactly innocent. You know your fun-time sweeties repressed Steve’s breathing as badly as the neck injuries? Sent him into that coma?”

“Wow, you’re a real genius! Never dawned on me. Oh, hold on. IT’LL TORTURE ME EVERY GODDAMN MOMENT, OF EVERY FREAKIN’ DAY, FOR THE REST OF MY CURSED LIFE.”

At least the kid had a theory about the attacks, supernatural sorcery shit that blew Eddie’s mind. Also, one of Dustin’s friends, Max, was apparently lined up to be the next victim. For some wild reason, the only thing keeping the killer at bay was endless Kate Bush.

“Eddie,” asked Dustin, while Eddie stared into a box of Cap’n Crunch he’d literally no appetite for. “Is there any music you reckon might help Steve?”

…

‘In this world we're just beginnin'

To understand the miracle of livin'’

Steve was beyond sick of Belinda.

She ebbed and flowed through his consciousness pretty much constantly. Trouble was, whenever she was randomly gone, as she was now, the swirling red fog around him thickened. He was confused, and yeah, he was frightened. He’d not heard any squelching footsteps or booming synth voices lately, but he sensed that thing was still out there.

He occasionally heard talking. People poked and prodded him, and breathing was sometimes a scary battle. He tried to talk himself once or twice, but he couldn’t even open his eyes. He was lost and sick and hurting and… so lost.

Right until he felt somebody stroking his hair. Then a moist feather-soft brush on his brow. 

Eddie.

He’d recognise Eddie’s kiss anywhere, whether rough or dumbass levels of sweet. Eddie was here. Eddie was with him. Steve strove harder than ever to fight free of the choking fog.

“Keep breathing, Baby.”

Eddie’s voice. Broken and distant, but it was him.

“Keep breathing,” Eddie whispered, “please.”

“CODE RED, I REPEAT THIS IS A CODE RED! EDDIE, DO YOU COPY?” 

Steve’s blood literally jumped. Shit, was that Henderson? “Eddie, the night nurse has started her rounds early. I repeat—she’s started her rounds. You gotta get outta there NOW.”

Too much. Steve’s head was too muddled, he didn’t understand. He finally fluttered his eyes open and latched his blurry focus onto Eddie. Who startled like a coyote bit his butt. Steve would’ve laughed, if he’d gotten the lung power.

“Steve? Steve!”

Eddie seemed spooked. Steve’s heart rate skyrocketed. He was in a hospital bed. He’d got some weird plastic mask thing on his face. When he tried to lift his arm, pain lanced hotly. 

Oh God, oh God!

He fixed on Eddie and felt himself calm a little. “Please,” he murmured, his voice a barely-there rasp. “Don’t go.”

Eddie squeezed Steve’s hand and smiled gently. “Not if I can help it, darlin’.”

Steve faintly registered a door flying wide. A voice cried out, echoed by a wailing alarm. He somehow found the strength to grip Eddie’s fingers, even as Belinda Carlisle launched up in his ears again:

‘Baby, I was afraid before

But I'm not afraid anymore…’

Eddie’s hand was torn away from Steve’s loosening grip, and Steve slipped back into the fog.

...

(Steve is okay, Vecna got distracted and El whipped his ass anyway, then Eddie get off, and it all ended happily... promise!) You tube link to 'heaven is a place on earth' for other 80s pop obsessives

Thanks for reading! All my ST fic on AO3

[i-am-baechu]

♡ Summary: Kim Seokjin is a popular cardiologist at Map of Seoul Hospital. Everyone looks up to him, especially a rookie named L/N Y/N. 

♡ Pairing: Doctor! Seokjin! x Rookie Nurse! Y/N

♡ Rating: Explicit (18+) 

♡ Genre: Doctor Jin!, Nurse reader, Jin is a little turd, Y/N is cheerful and outgoing, love at first sight, fluff, romance, comedy, angst, and smut 

♡ Warnings: Medical stuff and sex scene 

♡ Author's Note: Inspired by a Japanese drama I watched! I think this my new fav fic lol

♡ Playlist - I love official hige dandism

“The greatest gift that you can give to others is the gift of unconditional love and acceptance” -Brian Tracy 

I was eighteen when everything made sense for me. 

I was on a school trip and I was going around town with my friends. The spring just hit the city and the petals fell from the trees onto the busy streets. Writing in my notebook about the different sights was hard to do because there was no surface to write neatly. How was my teacher expecting nice work? I just tried my best to write it as neatly as I could. 

I saw a little shop that was selling little charms and I couldn’t stop myself. There was a cute cat that was holding a heart, they were all cute but one caught her eye. It was a hamster holding a heart that said LUCK in bold letters. She gently picked it up and the shopkeep smiled at me, “Interested?” 

“Yes...how much?”

The older lady shook her head and took the charm, “No worries. It’s free for you.”

I was confused and tilted my head at her, “Free? Why-”

“It can give you luck in the future with your job, education, and more importantly love.”

“Love?” 

The lady nodded her head and handed me a special red velvet bag with gold symbols, “Good luck.”

I waved goodbye to her and walked away with a little smile on my face. Love. I have always wanted love ever since my mom told me about her love story with my dad. It just sounded so perfect and beautiful. Who wouldn’t want to fall in love with their soulmate? 

It was an empty street and it was pretty with the flowers covering the park cars. I put my hair in a low ponytail and continued to walk to the next place that was on the paper. I saw a light pink tissue on the street and I looked up to see an older woman with her bike. I picked up the tissue and ran towards her, “Excuse me, you dropped this.”

All of a sudden, she fell to the floor. I took off my sweater and placed it under her head. I looked around me and I saw an EpiPen. I picked it up and looked at her face to see it was swollen alongside her arm. She stared at the EpiPen and started to panic. She had never used an EpiPen, she’s only ever seen one on TV.

“Help!! Someone, help!!” 

“What’s happening!?”

She looked up and saw an older man making his way to her. His eyes were kind and his smile made her feel okay. He kneeled next to her and pushed some hair behind the older lady, “It’s going to be okay. Seokjin! I need your help!” 

She turned her head and her eyes widened when she saw a handsome man around her age. He glanced at her but didn’t say anything. She watched them help the lady but her eyes never left “Seokjin”. He was so handsome and he knew what he was doing. The older man turned to her and gave her a soft smile, “Call an ambulance okay. She’s going to be okay thanks to you.”

“Okay.”

I watched the older lady getting rolled behind the ambulance and I stared with nervousness. Just then I felt a hand on the top of my head and she looked up to see “Seokjin'' smiling at me, “You did great.”

“Th-Thank you...my name is L/N Y/N.”

He ruffled my hair and started to walk to the ambulance but he looked back at me, “My name is Seokjin. We’ll take her to the Map of Seoul Hospital where I’m a resident, she’s going to be okay.” 

I nodded my head and watched him enter the ambulance with the older man. She continued to watch until the ambulance was out of her sight. I figured out what I wanted to do with my life and it was all thanks to Seokjin. I wanted to be a nurse to support Seokjin. 

Y/N stared at the hospital with a smile on her face, it was actually happening. She spent five years working on becoming a nurse. The amount of tests she took and all the studying paid off for this moment. Her grip around her bag strap tightened and she nodded her head, “Let’s go..” 

“Y/N!” 

She turned around and she waved with excitement, “Kook!! Tae!!”

Jeon Jungkook and Kim Taehyung ran towards her with smiles on their faces. Jungkook and Taehyung are her closest friends from nursing school. They were her rock when things got hard and they supported her like how real brothers would. Jungkook and Taehyung were going to be a pediatric nurse while Y/N was going to become a cardiovascular nurse. There were only two people who wanted to be cardiovascular nurses in their nursing program, Y/N and an acquaintance named; Park Aria. Park Aria is an amazing student and she was always on top of her classes while Y/N was in the middle. Aria belonged in the medical field and it was clear. 

“Are you ready?” 

Y/N nodded her head as the three walked through the hospital doors, “I’ll try my best. We got this, right!?” 

Jungkook nodded his head at her and looked at Taehyung, “I can’t wait to see the kids.”

Taehyung let out a small laugh and gently slapped Jungkook’s shoulder, “If you can handle blood.” 

“Don’t tease him, blood is scary.” 

Y/N went to change into her uniform and she stared at herself in the mirror. She wanted to cry but she already cried with her mom yesterday and she couldn’t ruin her uniform. She couldn’t let Seokjin see her tears. She smacked her cheeks gently and nodded her head, “Let’s do this.” 

She walked towards the cardiology station and saw Aria there. She bit her lip and closed her eyes tightly. She was always awkward with Aria not because she didn’t like her but because Aria was always serious. She didn’t want her to be uncomfortable with her. 

“Aria...good morning.” 

Aria turned towards her and gave a small smile, “Good morning, Nurse L/N.” 

Y/N’s face felt hot and she bowed her head, “So-Sorry, Nurse Park. Good morning, Nurse Park.”

Aria smiled at her and turned towards the staff. Y/N glanced at the staff and rushed to stand next to Aria. The staff smiled at them and bowed towards them, “Welcome to Cardiology. My name is Cho Chaewon and I’m the head nurse. I’m glad we have new faces.”

“I know the most here so any questions, ask me.”

Y/N turned her head to see a tan man with black glasses. He was chubby but it was like a teddy bear, he would give the best hugs, “My name is Min Minho.”

“My name is Lee Sonia.”

Aria bowed at the nurses and Y/N glanced at her. She bowed her head alongside Aria hoping she didn’t embarrass herself, “Thank you!” 

When she stood back up, there were footsteps that echoed through the room. She turned her head and she saw Seokjin reading a paper on his clipboard. Everything around her went silent and she saw Seokjin. She saw him with a spotlight and his smile that she remembered. She clenched her chest gently as he left her sight. Minho glanced at her and smirked. He leaned towards Y/N, “Are you staring at the devil?” 

“Eh? Devil?” 

Sonia nodded her head with a frown, “He’s so handsome but he’s so ruthless.”

Y/N shook her head and glanced at Seokjin, “That can’t be...he was so nice to me that day.”

“WHAT!? Nice!?”

She jumped at the sudden yell and nodded her head at Minho, “Yeah...when I was eighteen I met him. He was kind to me.”

Minho shook his head with a chuckle, “Maybe you hit your head and assumed it was him being nice.” 

Chaewon sighed and shook her head, “Now, Y/N and Aria...You guys will be heading to a lecture by the head doctor. After that, just make your way back to us and we’ll discuss teams.” 

Going down the hallway felt surreal. Y/N overheard conversations that she read in her textbook, it was exciting. She continued to make her way but at the end of the hall, she saw Seokjin. He was talking to another doctor and she couldn’t help but smile. She made her way to him and watched the other doctor leave. This is my chance....

She stood in front of Seokjin and smiled at him, “Doctor Kim, I’m so excited to work with you. It’s nice to meet you again.” 

The look he was giving, she couldn’t understand and she tilted her head, “Who are you?” 

She blinked her eyes a couple of times and felt flustered, “I’m L/N Y/N...I met you five years ago and we helped save an older woman together....” 

He raised her eyebrow and he continued to stare at her, “I have things to do...rookie, keep to yourself. No one likes to hear unwanted memories.” 

Her mouth dropped and she stared at him with a shocked face, This can’t be the same person I fell in love with... “Huh?” 

“Talking about the past or other stuff is a waste.” 

She continued to stare at him with a shocked face and he looked back at her with an annoyed look, “Eh?”

“Get back to work, rookie.” 

He walked away from her and she continued to stare at the absent spot. That can’t be him...he stole his identity. There’s no way that can- 

“Y/N? Are you okay?”

She turned around and saw Jungkook looking at her with a concerned look. She pouted and shook her head, “I met an imposter.”

“What?”

“That can’t be Seokjin...The man I fell in love with. It’s the only logical reason.”

Jungkook nodded his head and let out a small laugh, “I’ll let you believe that.” 

┊ ➶ ｡˚ 　　°┊

“Nurse L/N and Nurse Park, let me introduce you to the doctors of this unit.” 

Y/N was still in a confused daze after her encounter with Seokjin. Even during the introduction in the main hall she wasn’t really listening. Five years later she wanted to meet him and have something blossom. Now the only thing that is blossoming is pure confusion and shock. Two feelings you don’t want to feel in a hospital. 

“This is Doctor Jung.” Y/N turned to see a handsome tan man that had a heart smile. He looks very kind or he could be an imposter... 

“This is the head doctor, Doctor Kim Hyeon, and his son Kim Seokjin.”

She quickly looked away when she saw those stern brown eyes, he looks like he hates me. After a minute, she looked back to see him staring at her still. She hated this feeling. She embarrassed herself in front of him and now she has to work with him. It was a headache but she wasn’t going to give up. She wouldn’t give up on him. 

“Y/N-”

“Yes.”

Chaewon raised her eyebrow and let out a small laugh, “You don’t even know what I’m going to ask you.”

Y/N softly said sorry and bowed her head at the older woman. Embarrass myself again, come on Y/N.

“Y/N, you will be on Doctor Kim’s team.”

Y/N looked between the father and son duo. She was hoping it was with his father, it would be easier for her. “Which one?”

“Obviously mine. Stupid.”

Her eyes widened and looked at Seokjin who was shaking his head at her. She bit her lip and rubbed her arm gently, “Right…sorry.”

Doctor Hyeon laughed at this and shook his head, “Y/N, I appreciate your enthusiasm. It makes me happy to see the new generation excited to help.”

Y/N smiled at this and it was the first time today she felt truly happy, “Always excited to help, Doctor.”

She heard a scoff and glanced at Seokjin who was rolling his eyes. She didn’t let this get to her because she was telling the truth. She wanted to help everyone and make people’s lives easier. It was her duty as a nurse now. 

Chaewon put the clipboard on her desk and she clapped her hands, “Okay, now let’s head towards our teams and help our patients.”

“Yes!”

Y/N was following Seokjin at a distance. Down the hall, everyone was glancing at him and she realized that everybody has a crush on him. He was handsome and he was the top doctor here, what’s not to like? He opened the door to the main doctor's office and she bowed to the other doctors before catching up with Seokjin. She quickly sat in the chair next to him as she continued to look over the clipboard as the sound of keys echoed through the empty room. She couldn’t look up from the gray board and the words before her gave her comfort (even if it was a diagnosis). 

Seokjin sighed and turned towards her, “Shouldn’t you be assisting me and not just sitting there?” 

She swallowed some spit and looked at him with nervous eyes, “Well, Doctor, you didn’t give me any assignment...”

“You’ve been reading the same paper for thirty minutes, shouldn’t you know what your assignment is?” 

“Huh?” She glanced down at the paper and re-read it. Her eyes widened and realized that it was telling her about a patient. She looked up at Seokjin who was smirking at her with a raised eyebrow, “Well?”

She stood up from her seat and bowed at him, “I’ll be going.” 

He watched her leave and he couldn’t help but let a small laugh escape. Hoseok glanced at him with curiosity and leaned towards him, “Did you just laugh?”

Seokjin turned towards him and rolled his eyes, “Do you have the report I needed this morning?” 

“O-Oh, don’t change the subject.” 

Y/N walked into the room and the frown she once had was replaced. She quickly made her way to Jungkook who was helping a little girl, “Kook~!” 

Jungkook turned around and smiled at her, “Y/N, how was the rest of the morning?” 

She frowned and shook her head, “I’m on his team...I’m happy but also sad.”

“Don’t let him bother you. Why are you here?” 

“Ah.” She showed him the clipboard and then looked around the ward, “I’m looking for Seo Jimin.” 

“Ah, Jimin. She’s sleeping right now. She just had her blood drawn.”

Y/N nodded her head and looked down at the little girl, “Hello, what’s your name?”

“Kimmy.” 

“Pleasure to meet you Kimmy, I’m Nurse L/N.”

Kimmy tilted her head and pointed towards her, “Idiot.” 

“Eh?” Kimmy started laughing and she ran from them leaving Y/N with a shocked face. She looked towards Jungkook and frowned, “Did I piss someone off? Why is everything going wrong today?”

Jungkook patted her back gently and offered her a gentle smile, “It’s okay Y/N. Things will get better.” 

“Better my ass...”

“Don’t swear. Kids can hear.”

“Sorry...Can you show me Seo Jimin’s room?” 

They walked down the hall and she smiled as the kids laughed through the empty halls. It was different from the cardio halls. In those halls, it felt like she had to be serious and she saw Taehyung talking to a nurse with a clipboard. He looked like he had been doing this for years. She smiled at this and continued to follow Jungkook. 

“This is Seo Jimin’s room.”

Y/N nodded her head and peeked her head through the curtains to see the eleven-year-old she read about. Jimin looked up and gave her a small wave, “Are you my new nurse?” 

“Kind of, my name is Y/N. I’m from Doctor Kim’s office.”

“Jinnie? He’s the greatest, isn’t he?” 

Y/N let out a small laugh and nodded her head I thought he was, “He is. You're my first patient.” 

“What kind of tests are you doing for me?”

Y/N sat on the bed gently and shook her head, “I’m here to meet you.” She looked around and saw hamster stickers on her wall with a familiar K-pop group, “You like Red Velvet?”

Jimin's grin widened and nodded her head, “I love Yeri but Wendy is my bias.” 

“Ah, good choice. Is that why you have the hamsters?” 

“It makes me think of my room at home. It makes me smile.” 

Y/N smiled at this and nodded her head, “Music is the greatest pleasure one can have. It makes you feel happy with a simple note. It’s amazing.” 

“Y/N, I hope I get to see you more. I don’t get to talk about my music.”

“You can always talk to me. We can talk about Red Velvet, every minute of the day.” 

Jimin laughed and looked at Jungkook, “Do you like Red Velvet?” 

“I’ve heard of them.” 

Jimin pouted and leaned towards Y/N, “He’s boring. I like you.” 

At least you like me, “I like you too.” Y/N glanced down at her watch and then back at Jimin with a frown, “I have to go but don’t be afraid to push the button or call for Mr. Boring.” 

“I can still hear you.”

“Okay Nurse Y/N.” 

Y/N and Jungkook walked outside and walked towards the front desk of the pediatrician department.  She sighed and glanced at Jungkook, “She had purplish lips...I read that she’s been having shortness of breath more frequently. Any news on that?” 

“Doctor Yu says that they're waiting for a test result to see her oxygen levels...if it’s good then she can be discharged with medication but they don't think that's going to happen.”

“I saw her calendar...she has Friday circled for her discharge. I hope everything turns out for her.” 

Y/N was making her way back to the Seokjin’s office but was stopped. She looked up to see Doctor Jung giving her a friendly smile, “Are you the one who is trying to defeat the devil?”

She tilted her head and she was confused, “Devil?”

“Yeah, Jin.”

“O-Oh, Doctor Seokjin...wait-defeat?” 

Hoseok let out a laugh and nodded his head, “I think you're the one that can defeat him and I'll help you.” 

“I-I don’t want to defeat anyone!?” 

“I’ll help you with him. I’ve known him since we were kids, I’ll get him to like you back.”

Y/N’s eyes widened and she looked around her frantically, “Don’t say that so loud...wait you’ll help me? Why?”

Hoseok leaned forward with their foreheads almost touching. This caused Y/N to be stiff at the sudden action, “I want to see him happy. Let’s defeat the devil.”

Y/N smiled at this and nodded her head, “O-Okay.~” 

Hoseok looked around and glanced at the vending machine, “You want a protein bar?” 

“Oh, that sounds good. Is it chocolate?” 

“I think so, let’s go see together.” 

“Okay.”

There was a pair of annoyed eyes on her back and maybe if she saw the eyes, she would melt under the brown irises. 

“Nurse Y/N?”

“Mmm?” 

Y/N was drawing Jimin’s blood as she was making her usual rounds, “Do you think I’ll be able to leave this week?” 

Y/N's brain stopped working for a second and she swallowed her spit. She glanced at Jimin and gave her a gentle smile, “Hopefully. Medicine will always be there for you, no matter what.”

“I want to see my council friends.” 

Y/N brought the needle to the vial and smiled at Jimin, “You're on the council?” 

“Yeah, I’m the student body president.”

“Wow, that’s amazing. That means you can handle responsibility.” 

Jimin nodded her head and just then the curtains were pushed to see a group of younger kids. They all looked at Jimin with a star in their eyes and Y/N couldn’t help but feel her heart swelled. “Unnie! Can you read this for me?”

Jimin smiled and looked at Y/N, “They always come with the new books.”

Y/N glances at the book and smiles, “Reading about Spider-man. He really is amazing, right?”

“Yeah!” 

Taehyung entered the room and waved at Y/N, “Yo.” 

“Hey, you. How’s everything?” 

Taehyung shrugged his shoulders and frowned at her, “I haven’t seen you much. I missed you.”

Y/N rolled her eyes and let out a laugh. She stood up from her chair and picked up a little girl to sit next to Jimin. She rubbed the top of her head and walked towards Taehyung, “You never texted me back.” 

“Y/N, you know I don’t have my phone.”

“But you have a laptop.” 

“Be nice to me. I’ll make it up by buying you lunch.”

Y/N pursed her lips together and nodded her head, “I want crab.”

“Eh? It’s not in season though?”

“Then I guess you don’t want to make it up with me...” 

Taehyung pouted and nodded his head, “Fine.” 

“Nurse L/N is this what you do when I ask you to make your rounds?” 

Y/N stiffened and looked behind Taehyung to see Seokjin glaring at her making her feel small. She bowed to him and as soon as she did, her papers slipped out of the folder and onto the ground. She closed her eyes and she already knew he was going to get mad at her. She slowly looked up and gave him a small smile, “Sorry...”

“Are you just going to look at me or pick up the papers?” 

She nodded her head and picked up the papers in a rush. She pushed some hair back and handed him the folder, “This is the vitals for Choi Nari in room 782.” 

“It’s room 781.”

She glanced down at her paper and then back at him with a sheepish smile, “Room 781...I just took Seo Jimin’s vitals.” 

“Good job, you can draw blood. At least you can do that right.” 

Seokjin walked past her and she frowned at this, so I messed up again. Taehyung shook his head and looked at Y/N with a disapproving look, “Out of all the men, you like him.”

She glared at Taehyung and then watched Seokjin talk to Jimin with the same softness he did when she was younger, “I like him because...because he’s the same person that was kind to me on that fateful day.”

“Idiot.” 

“I heard you.”

“Nurse L/N are you going to help me or just keep talking?” 

She bowed at Seokjin and then stuck her tongue at Taehyung, “Coming!” 

Taehyung watched with a small smile on his face, “Idiot...

 ┊ ➶ ｡˚ 　　°┊

Hoseok pointed at the cafe and smiled at Y/N, “Every morning, Jin gets a mocha with a chocolate croissant.” 

Y/N glances at the cafe in the entrance of the hospital and then back at him with a shocked look, “He likes sweets?” 

Hoseok laughed while nodding his head, “Shocking?”

“He’s the opposite of sweet...salty...no maybe sour.”

“But today is Friday. He gets a white chocolate croissant.” 

“Wow, he has a strong sweet tooth.” 

Hoseok and Y/N enter the cafe and the smell of coffee hits her nose. She scrunched her nose at the smell because she wasn’t the biggest fan of coffee but then the smell of fresh pastry came. She smiled and looked into the small window, “They have fresh muffins... oh, they have strawberries!?” 

Hoseok laughed, “The strawberries are really good.” 

“Doctor Jung?”

Y/N turned around and saw Aria looking at her with a frown. Y/N waved at her but when it wasn’t returned she slowly put her hand down. Y/N bowed at her and offered an awkward smile, “Good morning Aria.” 

“Good morning Nurse L/N. Doctor Jung, are you just coming in?” 

Hoseok turned towards her and nodded his head, “Yeah, would you like a coffee?” 

Aria let a smile appear and she shook her head, “You don’t have to...I appreciate it though.” 

“You should let me treat you after yesterday. You were the only one that caught her block artery.” 

“I had you to help me...I should be saying thank you, Doctor Jung.”

“Give yourself credit.” 

Y/N glanced between the two and she heard wedding bells. She smiled and looked at Hoseok, “Aria is amazing. She was always on top of the classes.” 

Hoseok smiled at this and nodded his head, “I can see that. You're talented. I’m glad you're on my team.”

“Doctor Jung...” 

Y/N looked past Aria and she rushed to the entrance, “Good morning Doctor Kim.” 

Seokjin rolled his eyes and moved past her, “You're blocking the entrance.”   

Y/N moved away and bit her lip, “Sorry...”

“Ah, Jin.”

Seokjin looked up and saw Hoseok with a smile on his face, “What?” 

“I was ordering Y/N a muffin. Would you like a coffee?” 

Seokjin glanced at Y/N and was already looking at him with a smile, “Muffin?”

“What was that?”

Seokjin let out a small cough and shook his head, “I said nothing. I want nothing.” 

Seokjin went to the cashier and ordered his usual but he glanced at the strawberry muffin. He looked over his shoulder to see Y/N talking to Hoseok with a wide smile on her face. He looked back at the cashier and nodded his head, “The muffin too, please.” 

“I had to give her a quick stitch with Doctor Yu.”

“Y/N, you learn on the fly. Good work.” 

“Thank you, Doctor Jung.” Just then a brown paper hit her face and she let out a small hmph. She looked to the side and saw Seokjin holding the said bag that hit her, “Eh?” 

“It's a muffin. Take it.” 

She looked at the bag and then at him with a wide smile, “You bought me a muffin? Is this going to be our thing on Fridays?”

Seokjin rolled his eyes and looked at Hoseok, “Don’t you have a meeting with my dad?” 

Hoseok glanced at his watch and cussed under his breath, “I’ll see you later Y/N.” 

“Bye Doctor Jung.” 

Y/N took the bag and looked at him with curious eyes, “What flavor?”

“Strawberry.” 

“Really? I wanted to try these. Thank you, Doctor Kim.” 

“Hurry up and eat that so we can get to work. No slacking today.”

“Yes, Doctor.”

“Don’t salute.” 

Doctor Yu frowned and looked at Y/N, “Sadly Seo Jimin won’t be discharged.”

Y/N looked at her and then back at the papers, “Her oxygen levels...you don’t mean...”

“Yes, a heart transplant.” 

Y/N stood in the office and glanced at Seokjin with a frown, “Isn’t she young for this?” 

“Nurse L/N, if someone needs treatment then they need it.”

Y/N nodded her head and looked down at her shoes. She felt stupid for saying that and she got scolded again. How many times will she get scolded by Seokjin? 

Hyeon looked at his son, “Now Jin. Behave. It was a good question. Y/N always asks good questions regarding patients.” 

Y/N looked up and smiled at his father, “Doctor Kim...” 

Seokjin rolled his eyes and glanced at his dad, “I’ll be going. I have to talk to Jimin’s mother.” 

Y/N watched him walk out and frowned, “Mean.”

Hyeon let out a laugh and stood up from his desk, “Don’t worry about him.” 

“Doctor Kim?” 

“You're doing great. He’s harsher on you because he sees potential in you.” 

Her eyes widened and it looked like she had stars in her eyes, “Really!? You think so!?” 

Hyeon nodded his head and crossed his arms over his chest, “I know so.” 

“All you do is talk, hurry up.” 

Y/N turned around to see Seokjin standing there with an annoyed face. She bowed at him and nodded his head, “Sorry. I’m coming.”  She turned towards Hyeon and bowed, “Bye Doctor Kim.” 

Hyeon let out a small laugh, “Bye, Y/N.” 

Hyeon watched them leave with a smile on his face. He glanced down at the picture of his wife and smiled, “I think she's good for him. What do you think, Yuri?” 

Y/N followed Seokjin but she was looking down at her shoes. She felt like if she looked at his back then he would grow arms from his back and attack her. She was so focused on her white shoes that she walked into his back when he stopped. She looked up to be met with his disapproving look, “Sorry...” 

Seokjin didn’t say anything but it quickly changed when he saw Jimin’s mom, “Mrs. Seo, thank you for coming by.”

Mrs. Seo gave him a smile and nodded her head, “I’ll do anything for Jimin. Will she be able to leave today?” 

Seokjin frowned and shook his head, “That’s what I need to talk to you about. Let’s go talk in the hallway.”

Y/N bowed at Mrs. Seo and she glanced at Jimin who was soundly asleep. She smiled at this and took out a small plushie from her pocket. She placed the hamster right to her and she smiled when she saw her hug it.

“She’s been sleeping for almost the whole day.”

She turned around and saw Taehyung with a frown, “I heard....”

“She’s not getting discharged is she?”

Y/N shook her head and looked at Taehyung, “How was your day?”

“Jungkook forgot his lunch so I shared mine. I’m hungry.” 

Y/N let out a small laugh, “You're always saving him.” 

“I can save you but you won’t let me.”

Y/N glanced at Jimin and shrugged her shoulders, “I can take care of myself.”

“You would let Jim take care of you.” 

She frowned at his tone and looked at him, “You always bring him up.” 

“Because it's the truth. This weekend we're going to the crab place?”

“If that’s okay with you?”

“It's perfect for me.” 

“Nurse Kim, Nurse L/N, let’s leave Jimin’s room. She needs rest.” 

Y/N glances over Taehyung’s shoulder to see Seokjin glaring but not her. She followed his eyes to see him glaring at Taehyung. She frowned at this but didn’t say anything. She bowed at Taehyung and made her way to Seokjin, “Sorry Doctor Kim. I was checking her vitals.” 

“Good. We need to check on Sakura in room 342. Tell me her condition.”

“Right.” She turned around and waved goodbye to Taehyung, “I’ll see you this weekend.”

“Nurse L/N, hurry up.” 

“Sorry, coming!” 

The walk to Sakura’s room was quiet and Y/N kept glancing at her shoes and his Seokjin’s back. Seokjin’s shoulders were so broad and she wondered what it would look like underneath or what he would look like with just his doctor's coat. Her mind started to wonder and she couldn’t help but smile.

“Y/N, would you like to treat me?”

“Nurse L/N, did you hear me?”

She shook her head and looked at him, “Eh?”

He sighed and looked at the paper, “Sakura is twenty-six, she’s been having breathing problems. Her heart rate has been slower than usual. We need to do an echo.” 

Y/N nodded her head, “Echo?” 

“Have you seen one?” 

Y/N shook her head and he sighed, “Then I’ll show you.”

Being this close to Seokjin was a dream. He was showing her Sakura’s heart but the only thing she saw was hearts in her eyes. The way his hair fell to his forehead and his gentle voice when he talked to patients made everything lighter. It felt like clouds were around her and Cupid was shooting her heart. 

“Okay Sakura, we’re done. We will tell you the results when we get them.” 

“Thank you, Doctor Kim.”

The two walked out and Seokjin crossed his arms over his chest, “What were we looking at in the echo?”

Y/N stared at Seokjin and bit her lip, “The chambers...”

“And why is that?”

“To see fluid...”  

Seokjin sighed and shook his head, “Can you be more confident Y/N?”

Her eyes widened and she looked at him with a smile, “You said Y/N?” 

“Focus.” 

“Can I call you Jin?”

“Focus.” 

Y/N was at her desk when she felt a hand on her shoulder. She looked up and smiled, “Doctor Jung.” 

“How's the devil?” 

“Still the devil but he called me by name. I hope I can hear it one more time.”

Hoseok laughed and nodded his head, “You're going somewhere with him.” 

“You think so?” 

“Definitely. I was going to ask about Seo Jimin's vitals from earlier.” 

Y/N nodded her head and started going through her papers. She started telling Hoseok but she was unaware of the familiar brown eyes on her. He looked between them and he couldn’t help but glare at Hoseok. He shook his head and made his way down the hall away from the scene. 

“I was actually going to check on her...this isn’t easy. She was so excited to be discharged.” 

Hoseok checked his watch and sighed, “It’s late. She should be sleeping but by all means you can pop in. It doesn’t hurt to check.” 

“Thank you, Doctor.” 

Walking in the halls when it's night felt weird. There were fewer people which means it's quiet. The only sounds you can hear are the shoes on the tiles and the small conversations between the staff. Y/N walked down the hallway and when she was about to open Jimin's door, she noticed it was open. Her eyes widened and opened the door quietly. She took her phone out and shined the light to see Jimin’s bed empty, “Shit.”

Y/N ran out of the room but she bumped into someone, “I’m so sorry-”

“Y/N?”

She looked up and felt relieved, “Jungkook, you're just the person I needed. Seo Jimin is missing from her bed.” 

The nurses were running around the hospital including Y/N. She was in the stairwell that led up to the roof and her eyes widened when she saw the familiar hamster stickers on the floor. She ran to the roof and slammed open the door. She saw Jimin crying on a bench with her knees to her chest. Y/N frowned and slowly walked to her, “Jimin...” 

“Leave me alone.”

Y/N sat next to her and wrapped her arm over her shoulders, “Never...You're upset about the discharge, aren’t you?”

“I thought I was getting better. I was doing everything right but my body...it wouldn’t let me.”  

Y/N frowned at this and gently rubbed her arm, “The body is stubborn sometimes. It matches our spirits. Remember, there's no rush in getting better. Take your time so you can be strong.” 

Jimin glanced at Y/N with a frown and red eyes, “I don’t want to be broken anymore.” 

“You're not broken. Don’t ever say that. You have so much love that your heart just couldn’t take it. Keep that love and positivity. I know it's hard but it will get through so much and it will get better.” 

“Will you be with me?”

“Of course I will.” Y/N let her go and took off her cardigan to place over Jimin’s shoulder. She pushed some hair off of the younger girl’s forehead, “I’ll be with you okay. Every step.”

“I’m sorry I ran away...”

Y/N shook her head and looked up at the sky, “I get it. I would run away too. Look at all the stars shining.” 

“I like the stars.” 

“It’s pretty like you. Let’s get you back in bed before it becomes freezing.” 

The two slowly walked down the stairs but they stopped when Seokjin and Taehyung came their way.

“Jimin!” 

Jimin smiled at Taehyung and waved at him, “Tae, I’m sorry I ran away...I just needed a moment.”

Taehyung sighed and went to her level, “I’m just glad you're okay.”

Seokjin glanced at Y/N and noticed the goosebumps. He slipped off his jacket and draped it around her shoulders. Her face was in pure shock but he avoided her eyes, “You can’t get sick.”

He walked away as she stared at his back. She smiled to herself and brought his coat closer to her, “It smells so good.” 

“Creep.”

“Shut up.” 

When she was walking out of the hospital, her eyes landed on Seokjin who was waiting. She flattened out her clothes and walked towards him, “Goodnight Doctor Kim.”

“Wait.”

She stopped in her tracks and slowly turned around to look at him, “Yes?”

“You're always ready to help. No matter what it is.” 

“Doctor-”

“Just like that day. You rushed to help that older woman and you didn’t even question it. You're meant to help people.” 

Y/N felt the heat rush to her face as she stared at him with a smile, “Seokjin...” 

“You're meant to help people, even if you're annoying.” He walked away and Y/N was left alone standing in the middle of the entrance. She raised her hands to the sky like in a victory pose, “HE REMEMBERS ME!” 

 ┊ ➶ ｡˚ 　　°┊

It’s been three months since Y/N entered the hospital and it felt like a dream. Well, not a dream because of the sick patients but a dream because of Seokjin. Since that night, it felt like they were closer. He only insulted her three times a day instead of ten, that’s huge. Hoseok has been getting her muffins every Friday but then on Saturday Seokjin buys her tea and a breakfast sandwich. She was confused because she didn’t remember telling him her favorite tea or breakfast sandwich but she wasn’t going to fight him. It was a sign that he paid attention to her or someone told him. She wants it to be the latter. 

“You want me to be your date for your brother's wedding?”

Taehyung nodded his head and took a sip of his tea, “Yeah, sorry.”

“Why didn’t you tell me before?” 

“I honestly didn’t think I needed one but my mom was pressuring me.”

Y/N sighed and leaned back in her chair, “I’ll do it but I want lobster.”

“You and your seafood. Fine.”

Y/N glanced at the exit and saw Seokjin leaving. Y/N stood up from the chair and downed her tea, “I’ll see you later.”

“Y-”

Taehyung watched her leave the lunch court and he frowned at himself. He looked down at his tea and shook his head, “Always the second choice.” 

Y/N ran towards Seokjin and smiled, “Doctor Kim!” 

Seokjin turned around and sent a glare her way, “Why are you following me?”

Y/N looked around and then gave him a confused look, “I always work with you...it’s been like that for three months.” 

“Let’s go before I change my mind.”

Seokjin walked away and she pouted, “Why is he being mean?” She shrugged her shoulders and followed him to his office. She waved at Hyeon who waved back and she sat next to him. She started to go through the paperwork with him (strutting here and there). Hyeon watched from his desk and smiled to himself. He could tell from his son’s eyes that he was happy but he wanted him to figure it out. He just wished it was faster. 

“Nurse L/N, did you check on Lee Sam in room 109?” 

She flipped the papers through her clipboard and shook her head, “No...it says he’s under Hoseok.”

“You're going to work with Hoseok today.”

She raised her eyebrow and looked at him with a confused look, “Why? I like working with you...we work well together.” I also want to look at your face. 

“I’m going to be in the office all day. You need more training.”

“I can train with you. I don’t mind.”

“Also, Nurse Kim...Make sure you do your work. Don’t talk to him that much.”

Y/N furrowed her eyebrows and slowly nodded her head, “Okay? I’ll be going...bye?” 

She left the office and Jin sighed to himself, “Dad the more you stare, the more annoying it gets.”

“I can’t help it. My son is jealous, it's a sight I neve thought I would see.” 

“Shut up old man.” 

Hoseok handed Y/N her clipboard and let out a laugh, “You really have no idea why Jin sent you to me?” 

Y/N shook her head and closed the curtains, “He said it's because I need more training. What other reason would it be?”

Hoseok sighed and shook his head, “You're so smart but also so stupid.”

“Eh! What did I do!?”  

That night, Y/N was walking down to her favorite ramen restaurant and she was shocked to see him sitting in the middle. She pushed some hair back and sat next to him, “How was the office work?” 

Seokjin put down his chopsticks and shrugged his shoulders, “It was office work.” 

She nodded her head and glanced down at his bowl, “You just eat the noodles and juice?” 

“Yeah, why?”

“You need the toppings. They have the best fried shrimp, it tastes so good with the broth.” Seokjin turned towards her and she was caught off guard with his look, “Is everything okay?” 

“You can stare at me all the time but I can’t do the same?”

“Eh? I don’t stare...I admire...that isn’t any better...”   

He let out a small laugh and turned back to his ramen, “Order something. I’ll pay for it.”

She gasped and put her hands over her mouth, “Like a date?”

“It’s whatever you want it to be.”

She choked on her spit and he turned towards her, “Do I have to do mouth to mouth?”

Y/N choked again but this time she met with his smirk. That dinner was the best dinner Y/N ever had and it was because she felt seen by him for once. She wasn’t the clumsy nurse that always stuttered. She was her true self with him tonight. And she got fried shrimp. 

┊ ➶ ｡˚ 　　°┊

“Tae, this wedding is so long.”

“Y/N, it’s a wedding.” 

“So...”

She sat next to him at the reception and of course, she knew no one. The wedding was cute with the bride's dress being beaded from top to bottom. Sometimes she forgets Taehyung’s family was rich. She glanced down at her chicken and ate a piece as Taehyng talked to his uncle. She looked up to take a sip of her champagne but choked when she saw Seokjin casually talking to the bride. She turned towards Taehyung and slapped his arm, “What the fuck?”

“Ow, what?”

She pointed towards Seokjin and then looked at Taehyung, “Why is he here?” 

Taehyung followed her finger and raised his eyebrow, “What a small world?” 

She wiped her mouth and stood up, “I have to talk to him.”

“You don’t have to. You want to, there’s a difference” 

“No, I have to talk to him because I’m in this pretty dress and I have make-up on. He’s never seen that before.”

“Go for it, I can’t stop you anyways.”

She nodded her head and she rushed towards him leaving Taehyung behind. He sighed to himself and took a sip of his whiskey, “I shouldn’t be shocked but...here I am.”

Y/N pushed her hair and felt the confidence coming from within, this was her moment, “Seokjin?”

Seokjin stopped talking to the bride and turned towards her, “Ah, Y/N. I wasn’t expecting you here.”

“Eh? I told you tho-”

“I wasn’t expecting you.” 

She slowly nodded her head and she turned towards the bride, “I’m going to borrow him real quick.”

Y/N took his wrist and headed out of the ballroom with butterflies in her stomach. When they were in a secluded area she let go of his wrist and leaned against the wall with a nervous look. He looked at her with a raised eyebrow and loosened up his tie, “Is everything okay?” 

“No...I can’t hold it back anymore.”  

“Mmm?”

“Kim Seokjin, I like you.”

“I know.”

Y/N stared at him and mouth dropped, “What?”

Seokjin leaned forward and pinned her against the wall with a smirk, “I know you like me.”

“How?”

He gave her a “Are you serious look?” but quickly wiped it off, “I know.” 

“And you didn’t say anything? Why?”

He leaned forward and placed a quick kiss on her lips making her eyes wide. When he leaned away he placed his forehead against hers, “I was waiting for the right moment.” 

“Ri-Right moment? Was this the right moment? I thought the right moment was-”

“Y/N, I liked you the moment we met. When we saved our first patient together.”

“Really?”

Seokjin let out a small laugh and leaned forward placing a kiss on her nose, “I loved you for all this time. Every day you give me a reason to be my best self. I want to be a better doctor because of you. You always want to help and solve everything, how could I not love you?” 

“Yo-You love me?” 

“I do, I really do.” 

“Holy shit.” 

He leaned away and smiled, “Well, do you-”

“I love you...sorry, you didn’t finish your sentence.” 

“I have a room in this hotel...do you want to go up?” 

“Yeah....Yeah, I do.” 

There were moments when Y/N couldn’t believe stuff. Like when she was five, she couldn’t believe that she saw a double rainbow. At this moment, she couldn’t believe she was going to Seokjin’s hotel room. The man that she’s been in love with since she was eighteen, loves her. He loves her like the way she loves him. What more can she want? 

When the door closed, she stared at him with wide doe eyes that made Seokjin want to die. He walked towards her and gently touched her cheek with his thumb, “I love you...I wish I was more romantic but I would go to the ends of the earth to show you. Roses can’t even express how I love you but they can try. Y/N, you are my person. I love everything about you...even when you ramble.”

She felt tears well up in her eyes as she looked at him, “I wish I had that on my phone...it would be your new ringtone.” 

He laughed and leaned forward without their lips, “No need for that, I’ll tell you every day for the rest of your life.” 

“Promise?”

“Promise.” 

The light of the hotel room illuminated their faces perfectly. The space between them was enough to create a silhouette. They leaned forward and her eyes gave him the answer he needed. Their lips gently touched, making them one under the light. Her arms slowly moved up and wrapped around his neck as he went around her waist. There was no space, no light was going to escape between them on this night.  

“Ji-Jin!” She gasped as Jin inserted a second finger inside, pumping it as fast as he could. She bit her lip harshly trying not to bother the poor people next door, “You don’t have to be quiet.” 

“Jin, there are people-”

“I rented out the rooms around me so I don’t have to deal with loudness.”

“Wow, that was really hot to hear actually.” 

His fingers curled inside of her and it was gently touching her most sensitive spot that made her buck her hips. He pressed his palm to her clit as his fingers continued to move in her, “So good for me.”

“On-Only for you.” 

After the intense orgasm, she glanced at him with a needy look, “Do you have a condom?”

“Of course I do.”

“Take off the rest of your clothes. It's not fair I’m naked and you're not.” 

“Your wish is my command.” 

When Jin comes back, the kiss turns from innocent with pure love to sloppy and needy. He gently pushes her up to have her lay on the pillows as he kisses down her neck. He placed a kiss on top of her breast and looked up, “I would eat you out but I can’t wait any longer. Next time I’ll do it.”

“Ne-Next time?”

“Of course, there will be next time. This pussy will only crave for me after I’m done.” 

He rolled the condom onto his dick and looked up at her with a smile. She returned the smile and nodded her head, “I trust you.” 

He kissed her neck and with a needy moan, she arched her back pressing her body closer to his. She could feel the heat from him and it was only turning her on more. Seokjin positions himself between her legs, his tip teasing her entrance. The waiting was killing her and she kept looking at him with pleading eyes. He begins to enter but once he is halfway, he pulls out causing her to moan out. He smirked at the reaction and stuck himself back in but fully this time. 

He let out a groan as he looked at her face, “I love you.”

“I-I love you more.” 

With each thrust, the love that they were both holding back was flooding up the room. The sounds of moans and wet slaps of their bodies coming together echoed. His movements became more urgent with each passing second, “You’re so...fuck... perfect.” 

Her cheeks flushed from all the love confession but she couldn’t help but feel so blessed in this moment. He gently pushed the hair out of her face as she brought her thumb over his lips, a gentle touch to tell him what her heart wanted to say. His cock continued to pound into her g-spot and each thrust was sending her pure pleasure through her body. 

“Let go, baby.”

She leaned forward placing a kiss on his lips when she felt the intensity coming over her. When she leaned away she felt like there was no air left in her body. Her body felt numb against his but she didn’t want this to end anytime soon. His voice was strained with the pleasure he was feeling, the clenching sensation was making him stutter. 

“Cumming.” 

She clenched her pussy around him harder and this was his breaking point. She was overwhelmed by the intensity of the pleasure as his head fell into her chest. The gasping of air filled the room as they stayed still in this moment. He slowly looked up and kissed her forehead with a soft smile, “My cure...” 

[kaliforniahigh]

MEDUSA - Part Three.

REPOSTED VERSION!

Warnings: guns, physical altercations, gun shots, gun shot wounds, mentions of blood, reader is not a pushover 🤷🏼‍♀️

WC: almost 2k.

Summary: Y/N is a private dancer at a Gentleman's Club called Medusa. Noah Sebastian is a crime boss. Their paths cross when one night, Noah pays for one of her dances and they can't seem to be apart from each other.

Series Masterlist

Noah, Jolly and Nicholas had a meeting at the port with some distributors to discuss some business and decide how to move forward regarding the stolen guns. Everything was going well, until Noah caught a movement out of the corner of his eye. They had a visitor and something told him it had something to do with their rival group.

The person was hidden behind some wooden crates and he knew there were other people hiding somewhere else. He mumbled in his ear piece, alerting Folio who was in charge of monitoring the cameras in the area and signalig to Nicholas and Jolly that there were people with them.

After assessing that they were all close by, he knew a confrontation would be inevitable, after all, they were not here not looking for trouble, and they weren't necessarily trying to hide. Taking the gun out of the holster, the other boys doing the same, Noah turned around, pointing the gun forward.

"You can come out and make this easier for all of us, or you can let us hunt you down. Your choice", he said, voice lound and clear. Jolly was pointing his gun the their left and Nicholas, to their right.

"They're getting closer, Noah. There are five of them", Folio said in his ear.

"What direction are they coming from?", he asked.

"Two from the middle, your direction, one is coming towards Nicholas and two towards Jolly", Noah looked at them to make sure they copied that. Shortly after, they heard a gunshot aimed at the sky. Guess they were not gonna come out.

Crouching down and hiding behind the crates, they surveyed the area, Folio directing them and alerting of their positions. Nicholas was able to take down the man coming in his direction. Noah pointed towards Jolly, signaling for Nicholas to work with him.

Looking around the crate, Noah could spot one person to his right, aiming his gun and shooting, he was able to hit them in the leg, causing the person to stumble and completetly expose themself. He then delivered the final shot. Moving forward to his left, he was caught off guard by someone grabbing him in a chokehold. He was able to elbow them in the ribs and wrestle them to the floor. Not wasting any time, he slammed their head on the ground, making sure the person was unconscious, before finishing them off.

"Nicholas, how is your situation? I'm coming to get you and Jolly so we can get out of here"

"We're almost done", his voice was strained, and Noah could tell he was in a body altercation with one of them. Shortly after, he heard a gunshot, some grunting and Nicholas' voice came through again, "Done here".

Two more shots rang out "Jolly, was that you? Did you take them out?" Noah asked, close to getting to their location.

"Motherfucker is dead, but he got me in the shoulder", Jolly responded, a little winded.

As Noah arrived, Jolly was grabbing his shoulder and Nicholas was trying to put some pressure on it with the jacket he was wearing. "Let's go to the car, there we can assess the damage and see what we can do. I'm not going to wait out here any longer"

In the car, Jolly took off his long sleeved henley, fortunately, the shot was only a graze, but he was still bleeding a lot, and it didn't look like it was going to stop anytime soon.

"Hold on, I know where we can go. Nicholas, keep putting pressure on it. I'll drive us".

Noah didn't know what came over him in that moment, maybe it was the adrenaline, maybe it was the fact that your adress stayed in his mind all these days, after he found out who you were. But all he could think was that you are a nurse, and his friend is hurt, and you were totally the only person who could help them.

Upon arriving at your adress, Nicholas looked at him sideways. He knew Noah for years, and they were never in this place, ever. "What is this place?", he inquired. Noah looked behind him at the both of them and said "Trust me, I know what I'm doing", de did, in fact, not know what he was doing. And that is why he told them to wait in the car while he went to knock on your door.

The lights were on, but he thought for a second that you could be working right now, but he knocked anyways and hoped for the best. You anwered the door, a hello at the tip of you tongue before you noticed who was standing at your doorstep.

Your widened your eyes a little and you had half a mind to think that this was it for you. Composing yourself, and asking in a rather inquisitive tone "What are you doing in my house?", trying to show little to no emotion. His answer made you wish he had kept his mouth shut. He certaintly looked better like that.

"Listen, I don't really have the time to explain everything in detail right now, but my friend is injured and I know that you're a nurse. So can you please help him?"

You were truly baffled by the audacity of this man. "Let me get this straight, you show up at my doorstep, with information about me that I certaintly didn't give to you, and you don't have the time to explain what the fuck is going on?"

He wasn't counting on this, he could hear Nicholas screaming from the car, asking how long this was going to take, saying that Jolly was still bleeding, and that he needed someone to take care of this right now.

Finally, seeming to take pity on him, you step to side and say "Get him in and sit him down on my couch. And don't get any blood on it". And just like that, you turned around and made your way inside your house. Noah waved to Nicholas and Jolly to get in as well.

As you were gathering up your supplies, your mind ran a mile a minute. You obviously couldn't deny help to someone who was clearly involved in some shady bussiness. And if he frequented Medusa, he was important enough to be dangerous.

When you went back to the living room, two men were sitting on the couch, both had long hair, but one's was slightly curly and the other one's was pin straight. You asked the curly man to move his hands away. Assessing the damage, you could tell it was a graze from a gun shot. Shady bussiness indeed.

"It was just a graze. It went a little deeper than usual, that is why it was bleeding a lot. I'm going to clean the wound and then dress it". You said, putting your gloves on. You then looked at Noah and said "then I want you out of my house".

As you worked, the silence was defeaning. You could see Noah and the curly guy exchanging some glares from across your living room. You could tell he wasn't aware that they were coming to your place.

The man you were tending to decided to make some small talk, to try and break the ice permeating the area. "Are you a doctor or something?", he asked quietly, but you knew the others could hear him. You looked at Noah, before anwering "No, I'm a nurse", looking back at him and smiling softly.

"Well, my name is Joakim, but you can call me Jolly. Seems right to introduce myself since, you know, you're patching up my arm". You liked him, at least he was polite.

As you finished, you explained to him that he has to keep cleaning and then dressing the wound, after a few days and when it starts to scab, he can let the wound dry on its own. You gave him the supplies he will need to take care of it, then put everything else back inside your first aid kit. You grabbed it, and on your way to the bathroom, you stop besides Noah "I'm going to put this back in my bathroom, and when I come back, I want you gone". You didn't give him time to answer, before turning on your heels and going down the corridor leading to your bathroom.

Nicholas let out a little whistle, stepping away from the chair he was leaning onto. Patting Noah in the back and making his way to the front door. Jolly put his shirt back on and followed behind Nicholas. Noticing that Noah wasn't moving from his place, Jolly asked him if he was coming. He just told them to wait in the car.

You waited a couple more minutes, stalling a bit to make sure you gave them enough time to leave before you made your way back to your living room. Much to your surprise, Noah was still standing there, minus Jolly and the curly haired one.

"Do you have trouble undertanding what I say to you?", your patience was waning by the second, and you knew he could tell.

"Listen, I'm really sorry that I'm here. I know you don't want me here. But you were the first person that came to mind when Jolly got injured"

"How am I the first person to come to your mind when I haven't even said a word to you, let alone tell you that I'm a nurse?", you state the obvious. You didn't know if you wanted to know how he found out.

"I guess I could say you haven't left my mind, not after that night. So I asked a friend of mine to research some information about you, because I wanted to know you better", he confessed and you tried to sweep over the fact that he said he thought about you all this time, because so did you, but you were not about to confess that. Sighing out loud and running you hands through you face, you acknowledge him again.

"What happened that night was completly professional on my part. And I don't know if the girls you hang out with find this behaviour attractive or what, but I don't, so I would appreciate", in the middle of your sentence, you walk past him, heading for your front door, "if you left. And please, don't show up here again".

You stare at each other for a few seconds, before he nods his head once, an air of finality hangs in the air. He steps towards you. "I'm sorry again about all of this, and I'm really thankful that you could find it in yourself to help Jolly, I really appreciate it".

You don't respond verbally. You're staring at his eyes and his eyebrows are creasing a little. His smell is invading your senses, a bit of cologne and gunpowder. You hate the fact that you like it. You take this moment to notice that his hair is a bit tousled. You have to keep yourself from running your hands thought it, or putting the rogue strands behind his ears.

He steps through the door and makes his way to the car. You notice it is not the Escalade you saw at the club the other day, but rather a regular car. You don't wait for him to leave before closing your door, leaning against it, mouth agape in disbelief about everything that just happened.

Inside the car, Noah notices that Jolly and Nicholas are holding themselves together, keeping from commenting about the mess that just unfolded. As Nicholas went to open his mouth, Noah beat him to it, "Don't say anything".

Both men snickered under their breaths, as Noah turned on the car and sped away.

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