#all the aro people so people would care about them more :/

[theswirlersisterscircus]

just looked at the d20 ao3 tag for the first time since fhsy was coming out and i was curious so i sorted by kudos and. why is the first page of fics almost entirely riz/fabian. guys. huh.

[dolokhoded]

i need to go to sleep right now but i've got zimon in the brain and i know i won't be able to sleep until i do something to get him out of the brain but i can't get up to draw right now and i sure as hell can't get up to write that would take me around 11 years so i'll just sit here and rotate him in my mind like a burnt chicken

[urlocalmagicalcat]

really long rant (happy rant) in the tags, mostly towards @synthetic-lavender /vpos

romance repulsed aros and romance favourable aros are both cool and valid but because i never see anything about us: shoutout to romance indifferent aros. romance neutral aros. aros who just couldn't care less. aros who have a conflicted relationship with romance. aros who are fine with romance in some contexts but not in others. aros who don't mind romance when it's not amatonormativity being shoved down their throats. aros who haven't yet figured out their feelings about romance. aros to whom romance is Just Something That Exists. y'all are rad as hell and it's okay not to 'pick a side'!!

[luckyladylily]

So like, transandrophobia.

To start this out, I am a trans woman, been around in the queer community for a while. I'm also bisexuality, polyamorous, disabled, and aromantic, and I think these other parts of my identity and the crap I've caught over the years for them heavily informs how I analyze something like transandrophobia. My wife is also asexual, so that plays a part in it too.

So every group of marginalized people has their own unique experiences and problems. It's more of a rule than something we've mathematically demonstrated, but as far as these things go it's ridiculously well established, and personally every time I've done even a basic dive into the issues faced by a marginalized group it's been self evident. I could easily list a dozen groups ranging from racial minorities to different kinds of disabled people to different queer identities and analyze their social issues but let's be real, this is pretty well established theory, anyone who needs me to do that is not really interacting with good faith. This is one of the big reasons we talk to people about their own experiences and groups, we cannot reasonably extrapolate the experiences of others from our own.

So like trans men and trans mascs and anyone else that falls under that umbrella has their unique experiences. The idea that we would even question this is weird to me? Like I can't even imagine the kind of evidence someone would need to present to me to change my mind, and given the pattern of the queer community to be shitty in exactly this way to people in our community, yeah that is not happening.

Therefore, we are taking it for granted that the trans men/masc/related umbrella has their own things going on like everyone else ever, and I don't understand how someone acting in good faith can try to claim otherwise unless they are young or otherwise very inexperienced with such things.

The next point of contention seems to be the name, and I gotta be real I don't care and I don't understand why other people do. I've read all sorts of arguments against the word transandrophobia and the majority of them seem to be rooted in a misunderstanding of intersectionality, and even then it's like there is such a thing where people get so mired in theory that they miss the forest for the trees.

Perhaps more important to me, getting overly worked up about something as unimportant as the precise term is... weird. Like exclusionists hating on bi and ace people weird. I remember what it was like a decade ago when exclusionists were trying to police the words of bi women, and five years ago when ace and aro people were under constant attack under the pretense that our language was harmful for some reason or other. You are going to have to work very, very, very hard to convince me that any bickering over language as it relates to transandrophobia is not just more of the same.

Next, "transandrobros hate trans femmes" and similar stuff. I've seen the callout posts and found them completely unconvincing. Again, they read a lot like the old "ace people hate lesbians!" posts I used to see. I'm not convinced that the individuals involved were a problem, I am certainly not able to extrapolate a problem to the rest of the group.

Finally, there is this idea that "maleness is not a vector for oppression" and this invalidates something about the whole transandrophobia thing, ranging from the entire concept of trans men experiencing prejudice to something about language being imprecise all the way to "This is fascist shit, omg these people are basically nazis" depending on who says it. I'm not going to touch any of that and just look at the underlying logic.

This is based off a misunderstanding of intersectionality theory. Many people think of intersectionality as defining intersecting prejudice, like a ven diagram, such that transmisogyny is the intersection of transphobia and misogyny. This is incorrect. Intersectionality defines unique prejudice experienced by people with intersecting identities. Instead of a transmisogyny as the overlap of transphobia and misogyny, imagine adding a third circle that overlaps both but also has its own areas covered by neither.

Applied to transandrophobia, even if we assume maleness is not a vector for oppression, there is no reason to assume that the intersection of maleness with a marginalized identity doesn't result in new issues. Imagine that 3 circle venn diagram that represents misogyny, transphobia, and transmisogyny. Even if you remove the misogyny circle there is still plenty of ground covered by the transmisogyny circle.

This just isn't a valid criticism. It is a pure theory approach based on a flawed reading of theory.

So in summary:

Everyone has their unique shit going on and I've seen no convincing evidence that trans men, mascs, etc. Are the exception.

I not seen any convincing argument that the word itself is bad.

I've not seen any convincing evidence that there is some epidemic of transandrophobia truthers hating and harassing trans femmes on scales higher than normal background queer infighting.

The most coherent objection to transandrophobia I've seen is categorically incorrect and based on a fundamental misunderstanding of intersectionality theory.

I would like to remind everyone at this point I am a trans woman, part of the group that is supposedly a problem for and I've just not see it at all, to the point where it is kind of weird how intensely some people are pushing this.

I'm not trying to be mean or whatever, I'm sure the distress on display here comes from a real place and real trauma, but I've yet to see anything that makes me think there is substance to the objections to transandrophobia as a concept. It feels and reads like the latest round of queer intracommunity exclusionism, and the fact that this time around I'm not one of the target identities doesn't change that for me.

[aromantic-pantyanarchy]

It's me. I'm the cis, heterosexual, aromantic man. I will never marry, I will never be married, I will grow into middle age and elder age and I will die unmarried. I will be forced to support a household of myself on only my wages alone for the rest of my life. I will be asked about women and marriage and children by my family for the rest of my life (or men, the progressive ones might say). I may not ever come out to them. I feel like I burned my coming out on something stupid. I don't want to explain it. I don't want to run them through the definitions and intricacies. I don't want the acceptance without understanding, placating me with ceased questions and poor explanations to other, drunk adults.

I like my hair to be long, I spent a year with it dyed a golden blonde with dark roots because I like the trashy party girl aesthetic. I want to dye it again with pink tips. I like painting my nails, black and blue are my favorite colors. I like wearing chokers. I also like wearing baggy jeans and ratty hoodies. I like having stubble. I like having chest hair. I like having a square jaw and broad shoulders. I wish I had a flatter stomach and a thinner profile frame. I don't know what this makes me, perhaps this is something no more GNC than Machine Gun Kelly. I think about this a lot, how queer my appearance truly is. I should think about it less. I have thought long and hard about if I could be trans or if I could be non-binary or if I could be genderqueer and the conclusion I ultimately came to is that I most enjoy being a man open to whatever self-expression I want.

I don't date, but I've thought about it. I would like to meet people, and I would like to have sex with them. But I don't want to hurt them. I fear if I explain what I am beforehand it'll scare them away. I fear if I explain after they'll feel manipulated or abused. I don't know how many people in the dating scene want what I want. I fear my own lack of experience will make me a bad lay, an embarrassing story to tell to confidants in hindsight. I fear my own virginity, a boundary to those I wish to be like. All of these fears are baseless, as I've not been able to even begin a single relationship in my life. Despite this I still heavily identify with terms like "slut" and "manwhore" and "thot" because my interests lay so deeply within casual sex, sex without great intimacy or emotion. This may be some form of stolen valor. I hope the true sluts are not too mad at me.

I made this blog several years ago because a mutual of mine reblogged memes making fun of aro and ace people, making fun of the concept of aphobia, and in addition well known aphobes. I didn't feel comfortable talking about aro stuff on my main blog, for as little as I talk about it. Living through the ace discourse of the 2016 era has largely caused me to cringe in embarrassment any time I am forced to discuss my orientation with people who aren't aro or ace themselves. I no longer follow this person. I unfollowed many people I was mutuals with from that time, most of them because they posted too often about how much they hated men and I didn't want to see that, some because our interests simply drifted too far apart, only one for explicit aphobia reasons. (Also one because they became a "both sides are bad, any vote is wasted" libertarian, but that's unrelated.)

I guess at this point I don't care deeply about what strangers on the internet think of me. If a trusted friend told me that they don't think I'm truly queer that may hurt. But I am going to continue to use the word for myself. I take up no resources. I go to events that are open to me. If an event was not open to me, I think I'd not want to go anyways. I am not a hypothetical, I am not a strawman, I am a person with lived experiences both within and exterior to the queer community. If you hate me, I will permit you to continue to do so. But ultimately, I am who I am, I cannot change these facts, and I would not choose to do so even if I could.

[ltleflrt]

Figuring out I'm on the ace spectrum was so difficult because I have always been a horny bitch. I knew what sex was at a fairly young age, because I'd asked my mom and she's one of those good parents who'll answer questions like those, and as I grew older and would ask more complex questions, her answers would evolve along with my curiosity and understanding of the world. And I remember having fantasies as young as 9 or 10 years old, even if they were hella vague and nothing close to what sex actually is lol

So as I became a teenager, and all my friends' focus turned from playing with dolls to flirting with boys, I automatically thought I was attracted to boys. And I paid more attention to Cute Boys than I did to Cute Girls, because girls were just nice to look at while boys were People To Have Crushes On. Because of heteronormativity. Looking back on it now, I know there were girls I liked to stare at just as intently as boys, although less often because I wasn't trying to pay attention. And I certainly didn't fantasize about girls because I started reading romance novels in 5th grade, so I was fantasizing about male romantic partners because that was the fiction I was consuming. I didn't even realize fantasizing about girls was possible until I was 17, and I had a few "am I a lesbian" internal crises for years because of it.

So when I did start having sex, I had A LOT OF IT with SO MANY different guys, and eventually a couple of women once I started accepting that bisexuality was real. But it was never really fulfilling. Not like my fantasies were. Not like my books were. I was slutty because sex was fun, I was horny, there were plenty of options so I kept searching for that satisfaction I was craving.

Getting married was a relief (even though it turns out I'm aro-spec too lol) because I was tired of hunting, and even if sex with my husband was meh, at least I had someone around to scratch that itch if I had it, and he didn't mind if I occasionally took care of things on my own because I'd read an especially hot scene in a romance.

I learned about asexuality in my early 20s, but I brushed it off. Couldn't be me, I'm far too horny for that. But I think that comes from the fact that everything you hear about Aces is attached to sex-repulsion or sex-indifference. I wasn't either of those things. I was horny all the dang time. I was fantasizing about sex all the dang time. I figured actual sex was meh because my imagination was so vivid that real life could never match up. Which could be true to an extent, but I think not as much as popular opinion would have us believe. If fantasy was really that much better for everyone, then I think we'd have less incels and unplanned pregnancies than we do.

In my 30s I finally saw people talking about The Spectrum, and I started examining my past, and I figured out I wasn't really attracted to anyone I had sex with. I do occasionally find someone attractive; there are men and women and enbies who make my skin feel tight and give me a little wave of lightheadedness lol... but it's always always the fantasy that gets me really going. If given the opportunity I wouldn't have sex with any of those people. Thank you, but no thank you, I'd rather just imagine it than physically participate in the act with them.

(Ok I might go down on them, but that's less about wanting sex, and more about being able to add them to my Tally. Hell yeah I want to brag about making *insert hot person* have an orgasm. There's PRIDE in that kind of accomplishment lol)

I have a lot of respect for aces that are not horny. I understand it even if I don't share the sentiment. And I feel like most of them understand me even if they don't share the sentiment. There's a solidarity between us.

Until I go into a fandom tag for a character that the aces have glommed onto because they're canonically ace or headcanoned as ace. Good lord, the non-horny aces can turn into downright vicious bastards if a horny ace sexualizes their blorbo.

This post is for them.

Horny aces exist. Please look up "autochorissexual, lithosexual, and aegosexual."

Refer to those definitions in regards to romantic attraction as well as sexual attraction.

Some aces may not fall into one of those definitions, because asexuality is a spectrum, but they may still be horny.

Horny aces are not disrespecting you by enjoying being horny on main. We promise we'll wash the stickiness off our hands before we hold your hands in queer solidarity.

And most importantly: Your blorbo is fictional and does not need to be defended from icky sexuality. They exist in an infinite multiverse, so your blorbo and my blorbo are not the same, even if they appear to be on the surface.

AND:

This post is also for the people who are confused about themselves because they're horny but don't actually feel attraction. You're not crazy, you're not wishy washy, you're not "waiting for the right person to come along" (unless you are, in which case I hope you find them). You're just a thin strip of color on a massive rainbow that holds more unique shades than anyone can perceive at a glance.

You're valid. You're one of us too.

And don't be mean to the non-horny aces. Tag your smut so they can avoid it. (But actually so I can find it lol)

[mikeru-funzies]

THERES SO MUCH I WABT TO SAY ABOUT THIS /POS

rant in the tags

nevermind I reached the tag limit. sigh. ok well there’s more I could say but in conclusion GOOD I LIKE THIS AU👍👍

Overdue info dump/reference sheet on my stupid fartsy pantsy lotf au (I call it ‘Lord of the Flies if William Golding Locked the Fuck in’ or, ‘Locked In Au�� for short 🤗) please be nice to me

Misc infodump that’s more to do with world building/designs ⬇️

Designs:

Not everything is particularly “set in stone”, these are kinda rough designs I’ve been working on. They might change in the future- might not. But that’s okay! I tried to make them distinct and more realistic, unfortunately my art style comes from drawing anime characters all my life so that didn’t really work out. Please think that Jack is ugly… my friend says that I made everyone conventionally attractive and I did not mean to- please think Maurice and Jack are ugly I’m begging. Also I’m aware Piggy is a bit thinner than he’s meant to be… I’m working on it. Hopefully the more I draw him, the more weight accurate he’ll be.

Also I’m keeping the heights in inches. Fuck you, I love my country 🇲🇾🇲🇾🇲🇾🇲🇾🇲🇾🇲🇾🦅🦅🦅🦅💥💥💥💥

World Building:

This is an au where their little plane didn’t crash and they took a trip to America for a choir show! Other kids besides the choir got to go on for good behavior/good grades. That’s where they all met and they all became friends :3 I am very boring, and enjoy slices of lives. I only wish for them to have a simple life living in late 1950s Britain and going to boarding school with each other.

I’ll post more about them, if you have any questions please use my ask box! I love looking through it

Bye bye

[astracora]

Drunken Confession - Poly!LADs

Characters: Poly!LADs x gn!mc

Warnings: Drunk LADs, Fluff

Word Count: 3086

Written: 11th March 2025

Notes: Established-relationship with gn!MC with all LADs, with my personal pov of the game and lil headcanons littered in. Unnamed MC, but using my personal MC's basic appearance and adjusted backstory. I take some liberties with what the game offers me. I... genuinely got a bit too emotional working on this. Anyway, I finally finished it. I'll be honest, it's very funny being autistic aro-ace and writing for an otome game, literally zero parts of me have a comprehension of romance. ANYWAY, Enjoy! Also if you want to know what I imagined the boys drinking, obvs Sy was his good ol' Gin Fizz, Caleb was a Sour Apple Martini, Xavi got a Starfruit Paloma, Zayne got a Bailey's Chocolate Liqueur, Raffy got a Sea Breeze.

Now Playing: To the Wilder, by Woodkid

Masterlist AO3

<- Caleb <-Zayne <-Xavier <- Rafayel <- Sylus

You're running late, dodging people on the pavement, when you get the call. It's one of those moments you really envy Xavier's ability to teleport, late after a meeting with Captain Jenna.

"Hey- Shit, sorry!" You speak to someone you almost barge straight into, there's noise on the other end of the call, but you can't stop to speak, rushing and rushing. "I'll be there soon, the report took longer than expected."

"Cuuuutie, you've abandoned us!"

"Fish, give me the phone."

"Rafayel, did you down that drink? We haven't eaten yet."

You feel the laughter bubbling in your chest, as Raffy, Sy and Caleb argue on the other end. You hear scuffling, and someone shushes them, as another voice rings out. "Darling, take your time, we can wait. I would rather not get called out because you got injured trying to race to us."

"I'll- Sorry sorry- be careful Zayne, promise."

"What I'm hearing does not fill me with confidence."

"Fish, don't drink anymore until we have food."

"I'll be there soon!" You have the image of a bright red Raffy, sprawled out over a restaurant table, and force yourself to run faster.

A month long mission, dragging out for longer than you had ever wanted, in which you hadn't been able to see your partners. Calling them, and messaging them on the few small moments of freedom, but otherwise you had been too busy. Arriving back in Linkon had filled you with the kind of impatient joy that you normally had waiting for an event planned months in advance, or a parcel you'd ordered moons ago. Except more intense.

It wasn't the same hearing their voices, when you had grown so used to living with them. Seeing them, touching them, having the comfort of them when nightmares shocked you awake.

Waking up to a cold empty hotel bed, and having to drag yourself out of your bed for coffee. Cold floors and quiet room. You were sure you'd been so fiercely independent before, or perhaps just better at ignoring the ache of loneliness when there was no one around you could trust to rely on.

Especially when you'd thought you'd lost Caleb for good.

You think about waking up one morning during the long month, aching after a bad fight with a wanderer, still too far away from the people you care about. The pain in your back, stinging, the ache in your residual limp a reminder of how hard you'd been pushing, just to get home quicker.

Then your phone had vibrated, throwing itself off from where you'd haphazardly placed it on the side table. As you retrieved it from the floor, messages outstanding.

🐦‍⬛ pretty bird 🐦‍⬛: Try not to miss us too much, Kitten, and make sure you let us know if you need anything.

🐠 cute fishie 🐠: cutie! cutie! look at this crab it's almost as cute as you. come home soon.

⛄️ sweet snowman ⛄️: Remember to take your medication, I want you returning to us healthy.

⭐️ little star ⭐️: Sorry I couldn't keep U company on this mission, Starlight. Make sure UR careful.

🍎 partner in crime 🍎: pipsqueak i got a new recipe to try when you get back. make sure you get back safe alright?

A reminder that unlike all those times before, waiting in the darkness when the world tried to press down on your chest, that you had something to return home to.

It's still a great relief to be home, as you see the restaurant doors, and the promise of family on the other side. You push the doors open none too gently, wincing yourself as you hear them swing open, and feel eyes focus on you. Cheeks suddenly far warmer than you'd like, and pulling at your one bracer with your metal hand. Twisting the elastic as you apologise to a waiter, and find your way to your partners.

They sit around a table, chatting and drinking, and when they feel you approach, you face the full force of five people you love with your whole heart, happy to see you again. Taking hands to join them at a homecoming.

Dinner passes, sating the fact you have not settled properly in weeks, and drinks flow. Rafayel sobered up at some point while eating, only to join you in trying cocktails, picking them out for each other as you tasted ones you've never had before. You try to shush him as he grabs your hand and pulls you into his lap to sing at you when a familiar song comes on over the restaurant speakers. Only for Sylus to assure you that he'd rented the place out, and no one would have an issue if you chose to dance on the table.

Which got you a particular worried look from Caleb, who you know had seen you get that level of drunk more than once growing up. Though Sylus had seemed smug, almost daring you to do so, as he'd pushed another glass into your hands.

When you'd joined Zayne, he had begun to talk to Caleb and Xavier about long term illnesses that could arise from extended space-travel, a topic you can't believe he's touching on while his cheeks redden further thanks to the chocolate baileys he's drinking. His hand grabs your hip, pulling you down into his lap, chin resting on your shoulder, to peer over at Xavier who is recalling details from his own travels. It is hard to focus much on the conversation, when he stops talking and begins pressing kisses into the back of your neck, causing you to squirm in his lap.

His chuckle is low and soft, fingers drifting under the fabric of your shirt, and you grasp his hand to entwine your fingers. Cold metal against his cool ice familiar skin, "You've gotten drunk Zaynie."

"With the safety of those I love, I believe I'm allowed to be so." You can't even begin to fight the smile that crooks your scarred face. You can feel the scar tugging a little as you focus your eyes on him, on the starry eyes and the red cheeks. Your other hand reaching behind you to brush fingertips over his face, the heat of his drunken bliss. It is a grounding feeling to touch him, in the same way as when he seeks out your hand to squeeze for a reprieve when his busy brain runs too fast.

"The snowman's melted again." Xavier speaks, drinking a tall spiralled glass of Star Paloma, though his starfruit has been stolen by Caleb who is chewing it alongside a wedge of lemon.

"He's happy!" Raffy calls from the side, reaching over to grab a handful of strawberries from the centre of the table. "You're eating lemons again, apple pie."

"I like sour food, maybe that's why I like you, fishie."

Another chuckle behind you and to your side as Sylus rejoins you at the table, with another tray of snacks. He slides into the seat next to Zayne, tugging you over a little so you're stuck sitting awkwardly on them both. It cannot be said to be comfortable, until an arm wraps around your middle and pulls you back, "You should eat some more, I doubt you were taking care of yourself on that mission of yours."

"Watching me with Mephisto again?" You tease, no heat in it, you hadn't spotted the familiar crow, but there was little irritation in knowing Sylus worried for you, and wanted to see you, even if it was just through his crow's eyes.

"I just know you far too well, Kitten."

It's a safe bet, you think, terrible at remembering to get things done when you're done with a day of fighting, just wanting to crawl into bed. So you try to reach out to grab some strawberries too, only for two arms to keep you restricted. Zayne makes an unhappy noise behind you as you move, and Sylus chuckles at his new found game, like a cat with a toy as you wriggle. Extending your hand out as far as it goes.

Sometimes you forget how strong they are, Zayne who rarely shows his physical strength, and Sylus who constantly holds it back, only to be reminded when they're feeling particularly clingy. Or when you desperately need the toilet during bed, and neither wish to relinquish their slumber.

"Caleeeeb." You call, making grabby hands at the plate you can see but can't reach. Trying to fight down the smile that wants to escape as you feel the rumble in chests against your back.

He looks over from where he is stirring a drink for Rafayel, and laughs, "Did you get caught in a fiery blizzard there, Pipsqueak?"

"I'm starving, and thirsty, and I can't get back to base camp, help!"

"Oh no, rescue is on its way." He waves his finger casually in the air, floating the plate over into your hands, so you can fall back against your personal limpets, and shove some fruit into your mouth. Dripping strawberry juice down your metal arm.

"Be careful." Xavier extends a tissue to you, only for Zayne to take it, so he can clean the mess up with hands far more carefully than you'd expect when someone gets drunk. Surgeon's hands through and through, you suppose. Even when inebriated, he cannot help but be a careful carer.

"Messy Kitten." Is spoken into the side of your head, as a hand brushes against your mouth as you eat. "Whatever would you do without us?"

You make to bite his finger, only for him to flick your forehead with a laugh, "I'm very capable." You sniff, turning your head away in a false huff, as he nods, some of the humour leaving him as his eyes turn molten. Watching you with pride.

You feel your chest turn just as warm, that familiar small flame that is nursed everyday by affections, blossoming like a flower.

"I know."

"But you need us toooooo, right Cutieee?" Rafayel moves over, sitting on the table now, kicking his feet out so he can lay them over yours and Sylus' lap. He knocks a couple of glasses over, thankfully they're caught by Caleb and Xavier's fast reflexes.

Having them watch you, despite the time it's been, the fact that to some degree you have gotten used to having them all around. A familiarity, a comfort, there is still something very heavy about the focus of their gazes. A reminder that they are five incredible people, who find solace and love in you, and each other, as you find in them. It is terrifying, in the best of ways. It still heats your skin, and makes you feel like fidgeting, however. "Of course." You speak, and it's soft, and it's warm, but it's truthful.

They are family, home, and safety.

When you walk through the doors, you see them and you know that you can lay down weapons and take off masks that keep you standing against the world.

You can breathe and you can live. It is the assurance and the confirmation, that there is nothing that you can ask of them, or tell them of, that will leave you standing in the cold, hurting and lonely and missing connection ever again.

That in no world, in no time, in no eventuality, will you not trust them, or adore them.

That you can survive alone, and you can be happy alone, but there is no substitution for how blissful and how joyful you are, when you are with them.

It's the very promise, that no matter how lost you get, they will find you. Chasing out fears you've held since your earliest memory.

The embarrassment makes you down your drink quickly though, avoiding knowing eyes, and watchful hearts.

When you finally leave the restaurant, heavily tipping waiters who likely had not expected their evening to stretch on as long as it had to six nigh rowdy customers, it's on light feet. You are pleasantly tipsy, the kind that comes from good company and delightful food, topped with drinks you balance with water.

Wary of the fact you have not slept well, and still a little alight from the long month of fighting, that leaves a feeling of preparation under your skin until you go through the routine of returning to your home.

You and Rafayel sing happily, walking down the street arm in arm, wobbling about, with the other's wary hands reaching out to keep you from straying into roads.

Zayne holds onto Sylus' arm as they walk, and you think you hear Sylus trying out some of those deadpan jokes from the horrible book you left on his desk for a laugh. You also are sure you hear Zayne laughing, soft and under his breath.

Xavier is nigh on asleep, head resting on Caleb's shoulder as bed beckons. Your best friend offers to carry your partner, who shakes his head, that he's fine, they're almost home afterall.

It is a happy buzz, so unlike times in the past when you had sought out reprieve in the floating sensation. Dimming the sharp edges of fears of abandonment and aching agony of self-hatred.

There is no pain, no anger, no loss, and when you finally see home, your feet are even lighter. The familiar doors like a beacon. You release Raffy's arm, turning on your heel and bounce back a little, "Last one there's a rotten egg."

Then you run, laughing.

"Pipsqueak, be careful!"

You almost slip, feeling your drunk fishie hot on your heels, your best friend racing after you with your partner, who stumbles a bit, but catches up quickly. You push your hand against the lock, pushing the door open, and feel the collision at your back. Falling through the door and out over the floor.

The gravity catches you, along with mist, as the four of you float a little in the air from where you almost hit the ground.

Sylus and Zayne look down over the four of you, and you are gently deposited on the ground, in a pile.

"Good reflexes." Xavier exhales, looking way more awake, even though his pretty eyes still swim with the drunken haze. He rolls over and pushes himself up, detangling himself.

You can feel Caleb's head against your chest, his laughter soft, he turns his head so he can look at you out of the corner of his eyes, "You're such a troublemaker."

"Me? I was having a fun competition."

"My head's swimming." Rafayel groans, clinging to your waist.

"Makes a change from the rest of you then, fish. Up you get." He's pulled up and deposited on his feet, then caught when he wobbles by Xavier, "The fish needs water, to the surprise of no one."

"Silly crow needs his feathers plucked." Rafayel huffs, but is quickly handed a glass, that he downs.

You and Caleb are offered a hand each, Zayne smiles down at you softly, his face still red, his warm eyes glowing. When you both take it, he lifts you both, into his arms, wrapping one around each of your waists and leads you to the kitchen bar where Xavier is now filling more glasses, and collecting hangover medication.

He bumps into the corner of the table as he blinks his tired eyes, and hisses a complaint.

You sit on one of the chairs, as you watch the group mill about. It hits you then, the exhaustion. Heavy and clawing. The walls of your house, and the people who make it a home, reminding you that you can rest.

As you place your cheek down on crossed arms over the bar, watching them, you feel the comfort settle around you like a blanket.

"Let's get you to sleep, Starlight."

"Too much fun for our Kitten, mhm?"

Always too much fun with them, not a single dull moment, feeling them pull and draw out the parts of you that were stronger as a child. The joy, the thrill of life, the satisfaction, all the feeling of being able to just exist and be silly, to have fun. Lost somewhere along the way at the pain of an unknown timeline, at the constant hurdles of life demanding you grow stronger when you had no ground to stand upon.

You felt yourself become more you again, over time. Reminded of how to live, and not just survive. No longer a raw nerve on the top, chafing under the weight of your heart, your aching feelings, or the metal hand at your side.

"Pipsqueak, drink this, then we'll go to sleep."

"You have the day off tomorrow, Cutie, let's have a lie in."

"Maybe then we can go to Destiny Cafe, Darling?"

As your eyes drift closed, heavy and tired, you exhale out a long sigh. Releasing all the weight of a long mission, everything that weighs down on your soul, pulling apart the shell of your heart, and extend it out as a gift for those that you would lay your life down for.

Your very soul.

It is easy, then, to say words you used to only be able to say when drunk. Hiding behind the loss of inhibition to share what you always wanted to share when sober.

Your eyes flutter open just barely, finding their figures, and you feel the scar pull as you smile, soft and small.

"I love you all so much." It feels a little wet, emotional, but it's warm, so happy and so relieved.

Because you adore and you love and you fight for this very home with your entire being, and that will never not be anymore true.

Inhales of shaking breath, tremors on the edges as vulnerability is offered up willingly. "We love you too."

When you wake up tomorrow, you'll say it again, over and over and over again, until they tire of hearing you. Until they can hear you say it in their dreams, and until it becomes as familiar to them as their own names.

You can think of no better use of your breath, and no better use of time spent, then reminding those who are home for you, that they are so very precious, and so worthy of every fight to keep safe.

That even if you should die tomorrow, you will always keep them embedded in every part of your soul, and seek them out in eternities and cycles to come. Your soul belonging with theirs.

[stellewriites]

and harmonise

showing all parts of myself a bit of love here while i figure out my place on the aroace spectrum

gaz x reader

aro gaz, ace reader, fluff

you’d realised you’d liked kyle for a few months now. it felt inevitable given your close friendship, his cracking smile and caring nature; plus those egregiously tight, but oh so flattering, workout shorts he insisted on wearing throughout the summer.

the slow development of feelings snuck up on you until one day you realised the urge to kiss him was blaring like a siren in the back of your mind as you listened to him talk about some album his mate johnny had lent him. you’d not panicked though, it had felt only natural to fall for him. as one of your closest friends, you knew first hand how lovely he was; in fact, you were surprised it hadn’t happened sooner.

you also knew nothing would come of it. the entire time you’d known gaz, he’d never once really dated, the few people he’d introduced to your friend group were never officially titled girlfriend or partner and didn’t stick around for long. you’d always dismissively assumed he maybe wasn’t keen on commitment, and since you didn’t date all that much either, the topic never came up between the two of you.

you’d met on a work’s night out at christmas seven years ago. he was a coworker’s friend that had come to meet them in the pub and you’d hit it off immediately when you coincidentally sat near each other at the table.

by the end of the night you’d swapped numbers and started to hang out more and more often; as the years went by, you’d only gotten closer.

this came to a head one evening when you were sat on his couch, sprawled next to him after finishing your takeout and watching his football team lose on tv.

you’d been flirting lightly all evening, teasing him as his team missed easy passes and stealing his food while he threw his arm over the cushion behind you and pushed his plate closer. you felt something brewing between the two of you and after a few encouraging messages from your friends you finally decided you were going to ask him out when he walked you home later.

his phone pinged on the coffee table in front of you and you snickered when you saw johnny’s name. “looks like you’ll owe johnny fifty quid in about an hour,” you said and kyle groaned into his hands.

curled over with his elbows on his knees you rubbed his back

“guess pizza’s on me next time then,” you said and he looked up at you with unimpressed eyes.

“you’re meant to say my team will pull through, babes. win at the last second,” he huffed.

“i don’t like to lie to you,” you simpered sarcastically. you nudged him playfully when he rolled his eyes.

he looked at you then, your glistening eyes and teasing smile, and leant down for a soft kiss, his tongue making an eager appearance but barely brushing against your lips before he was pulling back.

he hovered close and you giggled quietly, cut off when he dipped back in, firmer this time. you kissed him back just as encouraging, held him close by the shoulders and licked into his mouth before he got the chance to tease.

you didn’t know how long you sat there for, separating for quick moments to catch your breath before going back for more, magnetised and desperate to be close.

when you finally took a minute to break free, breathless and giddy, you gained the courage to joke with him. “so what are we?” you asked the cliche dreaded question with a put on voice and an exaggerated expression. you broke after a moment and snorted a soft laugh.

kyle however had frozen. “uh, friends still?”

you paused in turn, surprised even if you were only originally kidding. you weren’t expecting to be anything right now, but the term friends didn’t sit right with you after that kind of kiss either. you frowned and your hands dropped from his shoulders. “what?”

kyle cleared his throat, growing a little cagey and defensive.

“i’m not looking for anything, you know? but this is fun, babes. it could be more fun even.” he gestured between you.

“oh. i don’t… kiss my friends like that.” you shook your head softly, but then moved to hold his hand. “not that im judging, but i mean, i thought you liked me?”

“i do,” he nodded. his sweet eyes were genuine.

“but you don’t even want to try dating me?”

he sighed, jaw growing tense as he shook his head. he pulled his hand free from yours and ran it anxiously over his hair.

“i don’t like you like that,” he admitted softly, hesitantly, eyes guarded.

“oh,” you said, hurt. you pulled your hands close in your lap and bit the inside of your cheek. “ok. you just like me for sex.”

“i like you as a close friend,” he corrected firmly. “and yeah i think you’re very sexy and beautiful and i’d enjoy having sex with you, but that’s secondary.”

you felt your reflexive upset start to fade as you listened to him properly and you nodded. “i’m not built for casual i think, ky,” you said with a strained smile.

he nodded.

“not everyone is, it’s ok.” he sat back to give you both room. “are we ok though?”

you nodded immediately. it wasn’t his fault you were sensitive to rejection and the topic of sex that usually came hand in hand with it; scorned as you were by one too many previous partners that didn’t stay interested once you set your boundaries.

“yeah! it’s just— it’s funny really, because i’m literally like wired to not be into what 90% of casual is. i’m ace.” you felt the need to explain. might as well tell him since you’d already kissed the guy.

his eyes brightened. “you’re asexual?”

“…yeah, you know what that means?” you felt your shoulders start to relax.

he nodded. “i’m aromantic.”

“oh!” you started to huff a laugh. “fucking hell, that makes sense. ok, so we’re like two sides of the same coin then.”

he smiled down at you once more, his body relaxing and his arm finding its way to the back of your seat again. “looks like. what’re the odds, eh?”

you snorted. “jeez, it really wouldn’t have worked out. i would’ve been way too needy for affection for you, and i doubt you’d be happy with only getting your dick sucked every tuesday.”

he frowned, offended. “i like affection.” the hand over your shoulder tugged on your earlobe as if to prove it.

“shit, sorry i was just basing it off of the other aro people i’ve met before. i didn’t want to assume but i did exactly fucking that, put you in a box.” you winced.

“oi, apology accepted so stop beating yourself up, babes,” he knocked your shoulders together before turning to face you head on. “seriously, stop. i’m into that sort of thing and you won’t want to take care of it.”

you sputtered a deep laugh and slapped his chest as he grinned down at you.

“so…” he said after your laughter slowed down and silence took over. you looked up to see him pouting. “you’re saying you don’t want to keep kissing?”

you shrugged, reticent. “i still don’t kiss my friends like that.”

he nodded, grabbed his drink and chugged the last gulp back.

“and what if we weren’t friends?”

“but you just said you don’t like dating,” you said. “or like implied it.”

“and you don’t like sex, but you’d be willing to try sucking my dick every tuesday,” he joked, but you saw the serious look in his eye. “it doesn’t have to be dating or like— we can make it what we want. our rules for what we’d like from our relationship.”

you stared at him, speechless.

“so we wouldn’t be dating, but we’d be together?”

he nodded shyly. “if you wanted to try it.”

you pulled out your phone and searched on google ‘queer platonic relationship’.

“like this?” you tilted the screen so he didn’t have to lean so far into your shoulder, but he didn’t move away.

“sure, if the label helps.”

“i do like labels,” you mumbled under your breath. he smiled at you fondly. a thought occurred to you and you nervously bit at your fingernails before looking at him. “would we be exclusive?”

he thought for a moment. “is that what you’d want?”

you nodded. “i think so. at first at least.”

“then yeah, we could try that. if it works then great, if it doesn’t then we let the other know,” he said. he lifted your hand to wrap your pinkies together. “no holding shit in, babes. i know how you get.”

“fuck you, you’re just as avoidant,” you said but shook your hand lightly to indicate that you agreed. “so… we wouldn’t celebrate valentine’s day, but you would come do my weekly shop with me,” you said, trying to get your bearings.

“you could take me as your plus one to your friend’s wedding next month, but i won’t clap if you catch the bouquet,” he agreed.

you laughed, starting to get it. “even with the tax benefits we’d get from being married?”

he squinted at you. “ok, i’ll snap like at those pretentious poetry readings.”

you huffed and shook your head. his match had started back up and you watched the team run from one end to the other for a few quiet minutes.

“hey, we don’t have to decide now. we can talk about this more after you’ve thought about it,” he suggested lightly, watching you.

“why don’t you need to think about it?”

“i’ve done it before,” he said easily. “not with someone ace, but, you know, every relationship needs adjustments and this would be no different. we just need to feel it out as we go.”

“fuck,” you whispered. “that kinda convinced me.”

he rolled his eyes. “just have a think about it. i’ll come by yours tomorrow to grab you before gym and we can go over the details more on the way there, talk about do’s and don’ts, see if we’d actually fit or not.”

“what if we try it and it doesn’t work out?” you asked a little naively, voicing your biggest concern. you worried about the ‘what ifs’; what if you grew too attached, too jealous, or worse, tried to break your own boundaries to keep the relationship from ending.

you knew logically that you weren’t the type to get jealous, that kyle had always managed to balance his time between you and his older friends and that that wouldn’t suddenly change; you wouldnt be upset if he slept with other people given it wasn’t something you were interested in; he’d already told you he liked affection just as much as you did; and that he’d make an effort to check in with you - just as you would with him. but—

“then we’ll go back to being friends without the kissing,” he answered reassuringly, squeezing your shoulder and pulling you into his side. you sighed and snuggled close; that’s what you needed to hear. “you’re stuck with me, babe, not a lot you could do that’d have me fucking off now.”

you smiled and kissed his cheek. he practically glowed under the attention.

“ok,” you nodded. “you know i’m going to be researching everything about this deep into the night right?”

he groaned. “just relax. the internet isn’t going to have all the answers, babe. this is about us now, not anyone else.”

you hummed. “reddit might know something though.”

“jesus fucking christ…”

“hey! you’re the one who’s interested in me like sexually and uhh, emotionally? aesthetically? platonically? i don’t...”

kyle raised his eyebrows expectantly. “all but romantic.”

“right. so you know what you’re in for and you like it.”

he smiled. “i know.” his gaze flickered over your face. “do you?”

you’d been friends for years now, great friends. this would just be like a cherry on top of an already fantastic sundae.

“yeah. i do.”

“cool. then we should kiss a bit more since my team’s already lost,” he suggested and you snorted.

[taliesin-the-bored]

Tag game: tag nine people you’d like to know better.

Tagged by: @oneshoulderangel (Thank you for tagging me!)

Last song: At the moment, I have "Losing Your Memory" by Alan Star stuck in my head, which I suppose makes it my current song, not my last song. Hm. I get songs stuck in my head very easily, but the last one I had there for a significant amount of time was a mashup of different language versions of "Les Rois du Monde" for about a week. "Lehetsz Király", the Magyar version, is probably my favorite of them. It's worth a listen.

Currently watching: Normally, the answer would be "random mostly terrible old movies/shows" or "nothing much", but I currently have a hyperfixation on the musical Roméo et Juliette and have been watching it in multiple languages. (Thus, the song).

Three ships: This is hard. Maybe as a result of being on the ace and aro spectrums, I'm more likely to care about which characters are interacting than whether it's romantic or platonic. Here goes:

Kedivere/Bedikay. It can be romantic, platonic, or queerplatonic, but whichever way, I'm here for it. I probably spend too much time thinking about how in Cullwch and Olwen, when Cai gets mad at Arthur and marches out, Bedwyr stays behind, keeps acting like nothing's happened, and isn't the one to avenge Cai's death. The feeling of betrayal on both sides has a lot of unexplored potential. And the version where Bedivere dies and Kay fights to bring his body back safely while mortally wounded himself... And the version where Bedivere survives Camlann and Kay isn't said to fight in it, so they might be left together after their world has fallen apart...

Platonically or queerplatonically, Galahad and the Grail Heroine. I really like the tragic Grail Quest friendships, but I like theirs most, maybe because there's something weird and otherworldly about them both. I like it when characters are strange and endearing and doomed by the narrative.

Ever since reading John Matthews' retelling, which I read before the original, I've had a soft spot for Caradoc and Guinier. The Story of Caradoc is very disturbing, and I have some major qualms with Caradoc over a detail Matthews cut out, but all the same, there's a reason these two have the best track record with magical fidelity tests. Each of them would go to the ends of the earth for the other, and together, they're stronger than any curse.

Favorite Color: Blue, particularly royal blue and some teals.

Currently consuming: Black licorice with chocolate.

First ship: This is a hard one, since through elementary and most of middle school, I tended to go along with whatever I thought the author's intentions were and was more likely to unship something. The first non-endgame ship I got invested in was Sonya/Nikolai in War and Peace. I didn't like Nikolai, but Sonya did, and she was my favorite character, so I wanted her to be happy. The first non-canon couple I thought was meant to be together was also in War and Peace: Marya Bolkonskaya and Julie Karagina. My eighth grade self did not think their letters could be interpreted platonically. I still don't.

Last movie: If the musical doesn't count, the last movie I watched was Quest for Camelot, which was awful. Though not Robot Monster-level bad, Robot Monster has an elegance to its simplicity which Quest for Camelot lacks.

Currently working on: Various fics, most of them Arthuriana or CotRK-related (I am woefully behind on the Badfic Bingo), and (theoretically) an epic-style poem, though I haven't gotten much of it written for quite a while now.

Tagging: @gawrkin, @emperorcandy, @wildbasil, @gorewound, @knightsofsomethingorother, @ladyminaofcamelot, @tasosotaso, @amashelle, @gingersnaptaff (I have no idea who's been tagged so far, apart from the people on @oneshoulderangel's post, so I apologize for any multi-tags)

[casscainmainly]

A lot of debates have been going around on what is Cassandra's sexuality, some people said that she is a lesbian, others claims that she's asexual, but some said that she's bisexual.

What do you think her sexuality is based on previous love interests or previous runs of the early years from 1999 and early 2000 to today along with the out-of-continuity story?

Questions on Cass' sexuality are highly dependent on the person! For Cass in particular, the majority of takes about her sexuality come from Horrocks' run in Batgirl (2000), which is ambiguous and open-ended. There are multiple amazing readings that see her as aro/ace, lesbian, bisexual, pansexual, questioning etc. So I'm not going to give a definitive answer here, and these thoughts are all my own - nothing I say here is meant to invalidate anyone else's interpretation.

Preamble aside, I don't think of Cass in a specific label tbh. I don't think she would have such an identitarian view of sexuality - that is, she wouldn't think of herself as 'a lesbian', even if she exclusively likes girls. That's not to say people can't call her a lesbian, or that she will never call herself a lesbian. I just think her sexuality is more fluid, and more exploratory, than a single category.

She does experience heteronormativity. Despite her upbringing being what it was, as soon as she entered the world she would've been exposed to heteronormative ideals, compounded by her love for reality TV, her main romantic ideal being DickBabs, and being around TimSteph. This heteronormativity of course influences the way she falls in love with men, in particular the whole Kon situation, which I read (as most people do) as comphet. The Cass-Kon thing though is also about Cass parsing out friendship from romantic feelings, so it's not really that straightforward. Meaning that while I don't think Cass ever felt anything for Kon, the comphet-ness of that relationship does not invalidate (to me) her feelings for other men.

I think that Cass has been legitimately attracted to men before, though really only Tai'Darshan. Tai is really important to Cass' awakening sexuality, so I like to think that she did love and care for him. Do I think they would've dated? Probably not. But there was something there that's not present for Cass-Kon, or other minor crushes like Cass-Sal, Cass-Javier, Cass-Dr. Shin etc. Thinking of out-of-cont texts, her relationship with Erik in Shadow of the Batgirl is also genuine to me. Also also I see the man in Batgirl (2000) #2 as Cass first 'crush', so I think she is genuinely attracted to men, but not frequently and in highly specific circumstances.

As for women, obviously as a StephCass lover I see Cass as being head over heels for Steph. I also think lesbian!Cass readings are popular because she has so much chemistry with every woman she meets: Rose, Brenda, Harper, Christine, Cela, literally every one of them has fun romantic undertones. (HarperCass, in particular, feels very romantic in B&R: E). She also has a fun ship with Xanthe who's non-binary. So Cass for me is Not Straight, and experiences attraction to other genders besides men. These are non-canon but there's only so many times you can hallucinate your best friend caressing you platonically okay?? Even though I think she can be attracted to men, I believe she's more attracted to other genders on the whole, particularly women.

All this to say I enjoy discussions on Cass' sexuality, but I view them more as 'readings' of her than definitive conclusions. In other words, there are asexual readings of CassKon, bisexual readings of TaiCass, lesbian readings of StephCass etc. that are really valuable and can coexist. The most boring reading you could have is her being straight tbh, so any other reading I find highly fascinating. It really depends on what ships people like, how they interpret Cass' sexuality exploration in Horrocks, and sometimes what they personally identify as. And that's the fun of reading + interpretation!!

[atwas-gaming]

I've had a scenario in mind for a while now about what it would take for Sonic to finally own up to his feelings about Amy. And I think what it would take is...

Shadow.

Well, just plain jealousy and a fear of losing Amy before he even has her. But Shadow would be the best one to instigate it.

First, some headcanons about how they behave romantically:

Amy's maturing and spreading her wings. She's not moving on from Sonic, not really, but it's possible that she's starting to notice other guys. There's some hints in the Twitter takeovers that she may be developing some small interest in Shadow.

Sonic is clearly interested in Amy, and if you pay attention, he has been for a long time. What he's not interested in is marriage- at least, not yet. And Amy is clearly wifey material- she cooks, she takes care of people, she has a caring nature, she's protective, and she's extremely loyal. She's not someone you can use for a one-night stand, you take all of her or you risk shattering her into pieces. She's Sonic's friend, no matter what else he may feel about her, so he avoids any romantic interaction because he doesn't want to hurt his friend.

Meanwhile, Shadow is... not aro-ace, per se, I don't know what you'd call him. He can see that Amy is attractive, but so is Rouge, and Shadow has no interest in Rouge. He just isn't interested in the physical side of romance.

What I think it would take to get Shadow's attention is something deeper, an emotional or spiritual connection.

So here's the Sonamy/Shadamy love triangle scenario that I came up with:

As Amy ages, she feels her desire for male companionship growing stronger. Sonic takes little notice of it, but it doesn't escape Shadow's attention.

Somehow or other, Shadow and Amy end up alone together, probably on a mission or something. I haven't figured out the exact circumstances, but they're together for quite a while. Amy loves to talk to people and get to know them, and Shadow has a soft spot for her, so she's able to get him to talk to her about things that he's probably never told anyone before. And he knows she won't tell anyone about them, either, so he feels safe telling her.

At some point, Shadow realizes, she's done it. She's broken through his barriers, and at the same time, she's calmed the storm of emotions that he's had swirling inside him for 50-odd years. He hasn't felt such peace since... no, not even then. This is something else. He's never felt this way before, and he doesn't have the words to describe it, but he's fallen head over heels for her.

This is why he never lets his guard down, even around the people he trusts most. Because if he lets them in, even a little bit, he might let them in too far. ("Can you see all of me, walk into my mystery, step inside and hold on for dear life.")

He loses control of himself and kisses Amy.

And when he lets go, he instantly hates himself, he starts throwing his barriers back up, because... she's crying. She's crying because she liked it, and she wants more of it, but she's still so desperately in love with Sonic, and she's starting to think she'll never get it from him, so she'll accept affection from just about any man, and it's not like Shadow's unattractive, and, and, and...

So Shadow's raw and open and hurting, he knew before he said or did anything that he was going down a dangerous path, but talking to Amy felt so good he didn't want to stop. And he wants to erase what just happened like it never did. But now he has to be the one to comfort Amy, because this was his fault, Amy was just being the kind and compassionate person she always was and Shadow was an idiot for letting it get to him and making more of it than what it was and losing control. So he has to keep his barriers down for just a moment longer, just long enough to hold Amy and tell her it's not her fault, until her tears finally stop.

It leaves Shadow burning with rage, and as soon as he can, he forcefully confronts Sonic (I imagine Shadow slamming Sonic against a wall or a tree and shouting in his face 😝) and basically tells him, "Amy needs attention from a man, she wants that man to be you, but if you can't grow up and do what it takes, then I'll be more than glad to take your place."

Which scares Sonic good and proper. It's bad enough to think that he could lose Amy, anyway, but to lose her to that faker??? And it finally makes him go to Amy and (very, very awkwardly) ask her to be his girlfriend. And... I'll let y'all imagine the rest.

As for Shadow... he, quite understandably, becomes somewhat aloof towards both Sonic and Amy for a long time after that.

But Shadow's immortal, right? And there's other Amy's in the world. He doesn't have to be alone forever.

Oh, and as for why Shadow would confront Sonic instead of just taking Amy for himself: because he respects both Amy and, especially, himself far too much to do that. He knows good and well she will never be able to fully commit to anyone else as long as Sonic is still an option. If Shadow was to start dating her, she'd go along with it, but it would become a power play between him and Sonic to try to "win" Amy's affections. Shadow has no issues with fighting Sonic over just about anything, but when it comes to his own feelings, he won't stoop that low, and he's not about to hurt himself by playing such a game. I also don't think he would view Amy as "a prize to be won."

[the-meme-monarch]

telling this to you because you’re the only one who likes the human characters in dandy’s world. but

Sam (sprout’s handler) is the only non-binary character in all of dandy’s world. which had to be weird for them! considering the time it takes place I doubt they were out. with your headcanons of Delilah being loveless aro & Arthur being aro it makes me think that maybe there were a lot of lgbt workers there. maybe they attracted each other to work in this nice place where there’s less judgment. idk I’m thinking

i’d like to start off with this post of mine before i start my damn Dissertation HDHSJSN

and yeah i think working at gardenview was very generally very nice ! i just like to think arthur is very kind, he wanted to make a good kids show that teaches good lessons. and like, assuming the universe of dandys world is otherwise realistic to real life; he’s a black man born maybe the 60s, growing up in the 70s and 80s. he would have witnessed discrimination or had it enacted on him, and Certainly not saying racism just Doesn’t Exist Any More, but he would’ve grown up while segregation was still very prevalent and racism was. louder. in the general -especially white- population. and then w my headcanon of him using mobility aids he would’ve likely dealt with a lot of ableism. and being aroace(though likely just identifying as asexual, as it seems aromantic wasn’t coined until 2005? according to google at least) likely dealing with amatonormativity/allonormativity/heteronormativity/aphobia/or even homophobia bc Well If You’re Not Straight You Must Be Gay. also while he maybe wouldn’t have had direct experience to the aids crisis, he was still Around For It. and then also my hc of him being mixed race. and then All the ways these things intersect with each other. i think he’s shaped by his experiences and just wants Better and to create positive change !

i also have a little headcanon that he used to be a teacher’s aide ! i think he’s always been into drawing and making characters, and so this job is where he decided he wanted to do children’s edutainment :’] my sibling and i have talked about what we think the cartoon may have been like, and i think we figured “somewhere between animaniacs and bluey”

delilah ofc would’ve dealt with sexism, and amatonormativity/etc and shitty comments about how she acts or doesn’t really care to make friends, “being a loner”, or not being “lady-like enough” or god forbid being friends with a black kid. i think she would be queer friendly maybe more because more plainly “what difference does it make/why should that bother me, they’re not hurting anybody” but also bc “they’re still people too” ! I think it’s very likely both her and arthur were raised christian, arthur probably still identifies with it, but i don’t think delilah does. i think she thinks her religious upbringing was a prison NDNSJSNSJ

sam may not have come out to either of them, but i think they felt safe there that maybe they could to at least the other main toon’s handlers <:] and also with them being presumably irish, with their last name being mclaughlin, they would’ve been dealing with bigot shit for that alone i wouldn’t fault them in the slightest for not coming out to anyone ever. regardless i think arthur and delilah try to make sure that gardenview is a welcoming and kind environment that doesn’t tolerate That Shit. i can only imagine the smear campaigns the show wouldve gotten for having a rainbow flower boy protagonist.

also iirc sam is Stated to be nonbinary and using they/them, while looey and teagan we don’t know the specifics of their gender labels but we do know they use he/they and she/they respectively, and i do picture them deciding on those pronouns was a later development, and not a since-creation thing. idk if they would’ve come out to anybody either, or if they did I don’t think they would’ve even thought it was a big deal at all. i think toons in general are sorta just inherently silly little guys that don’t really adhere to human strictures, they think bigotry is stupid they don’t Get how someone could actually think that way

[papercranesandpride]

I've never actually talked about why I identify as loveless, have I? I want to do that. I think my experience with it is interesting.

A lot of time lovelessness is paired with aromanticism and aplatonicism, and that's interesting because while I am both, it isn't about either of them for me. It's really just a consequence of my schizophrenia. I have pretty much always been apl and aro, but I definitely used to feel love.

I had a pretty sudden psychotic break. It dulled all my feelings pretty much immediately. For a while there, they were pretty much gone, and they're still significantly less strong. That includes love. I did used to feel love. And then suddenly, I didn't.

I panicked a lot. A lot, a lot. I cried about it. For a while I only sent people orange heart emoji to signify the lack of real love. The only way I eventually got past it was by concluding that I did love other people. Clearly I did. I continued talking to them. I did things for them. I maintained relationships with them. I worried about them. Obviously if I did all of that, I still loved them. All of that is love. Love is a choice. It's a continuous action. It isn't just a feeling.

Except that's bullshit. It took me years to realize, but it is. Why did I need to feel love in the first place? Why was love something I needed to have? It's just a feeling. It's one thing that a person can experience. Nothing more and nothing less. Yes, it means a lot to a lot of people. That's great for them. So do football, and Star Wars, and Jesus, and Disney. None of those are mandatory, though. None of them are claimed to be universal across the human experience. No one says that being a fan of any of them is what makes you a good person. If you woke up one day and suddenly stopped caring about any of those things, the sudden change would definitely alarm you, but you wouldn't need to find a way to like them again. You'd be okay without them. The same should be true of love.

Because you know what? I used to feel love. And for about five years now, I pretty much don't. It really hasn't made a difference. A lot has changed in my life. Some things are better. Some are worse. I've certainly discovered a hell of a lot about myself that I didn't know when I was 16. But if I got love back? I don't think it wouldn't improve or worsen any of it. I wouldn't mind feeling love again. It wouldn't cause any problems. If tomorrow I started feeling it again, it'd be weird as hell, but I wouldn't be upset. But I don't particularly want it, either. I'm used to living this way. Having an additional feeling seems unnecessary.

There's nothing wrong with not feeling love. Period. End of story. Whether you demonstrate any kind of devotation or caring towards other people or not. Whether you still have friends, family, and lovers or not. Whether you can pass as someone who does feel love or not. It's just a different experience. That's all. Deciding that any one experience is the one that counts, that matters, that is universal and makes us human, is pointless and ridiculous. We all experience and define and feel things differently and that's the entire point.

That's why I don't use that word anymore, even for the handful of people who I do genuinely still feel something warm and fuzzy for (pretty much just family — my sister, my brother, my grandfather, some aunts and uncles). I'm still not over how fucked up it was that I needed to make up a way that I did love all the other people in my life when I just didn't, just to feel like I was a complete person. That's bullshit. I don't like it. And as a result, I reject the entire concept. I don't need it. It isn't my experience. It isn't useful to me. I don't love. That's fine, actually.

(Also please don't have your takeaway from this be "schizophrenics don't feel love." I've never heard another schizophrenic have this outlook on love. Love is experienced and defined in different ways by different people, and schizophrenia manifests differently for everyone. This is just about me.)

[madamefeu]

Hi! Here’s what your favorite Hazbin Hotel ship says about you!

Radiodust: You're an old-timer who's been around since the pilot. One off-handed joke about Angel Dust wanting to suck Alastor's dick was all it took for you to start shipping them. You always ship the two most attractive male characters together in your fandoms, even if they have no real connection

Huskerdust: I’m not going to touch this one because I’ll probably get death threats if I don’t tell the Huskerdust fandom exactly what they want to hear

Radiorose: Hello, aro-ace community! You love this because they're the closet thing to a canon queerplatonic couple that currently exists in mainstream media, and as a fellow aro-ace, I’m in the exact same boat

Chaggie: You like the idea of forbidden love, but you're not interested in handling all of the social/political ramifications of it, and would prefer to conveniently gloss over both of those things just like in the show. This ship has the flavor profile of vanilla ice cream with chocolate chips, and so does your personality

Lucifer/Lilith: You only want one thing in this life, and that is for a powerful woman to step on your neck. You are a bottom to end all bottoms

Radioapple: Daddy kink, but in a voyeuristic way. You like watching two dads doing each other, but there is no way you’d ever let them touch you, no, all you want is to watch them go at it

Rosiemilla: Mommy kink, but in a voyeuristic way

Radiohusk: Oh, you would let a man do unspeakable things to you if he was hot enough. You read dark romances and you want a dark romance to happen to you in real life

Cherrisnake: You are absolutely terrible at handling your feelings for everyone you've ever crushed on, and will try to convince yourself that you hate the object of your affections because you lack the courage needed to make a move on them. It would take a life or death situation for you to tell your crush how you really feel about them, and even then you'd be more afraid of telling them than of dying

Guitarspear: Hello, Adam simps! You binge-read workplace romances and you fantasise about dating your boss even though he's a dick 90% of the time. Strangely, the fact that he's a dick makes you even more attracted to him

Staticmoth: Your ideal ship is two horrible people who deserve each other. You want what they have, but at the same time you don't

Zestmilla: Your preferred aesthetic is old married couple core, and I respect that. You binge-read found family fics on AO3, and your favorite tag is hurt/comfort

Radiostatic: You love the idea of someone being obsessed with you when you have no interest in them. You like to laugh at their, quite frankly, pathetic attempts to get you to notice them, and you're waiting for the day when the penny will drop and they'll realise that they are nothing to you, and never will be

Arackpentious: You have never cared about canon, and you don't intend to start now. You probably simp for Sir Pentious and use Arackniss as a self-insert. We know barely any canon information about him, so it's easy for you to project yourself onto him so that you can get doubly-dicked down by the Victorian snake man

Charlastor: You're all about the aesthetic. You got into this ship because there's an abundance of gorgeous fanart for it, even if there's no chance of them being together in canon. You don't care about that, however, because they look beautiful together and that's all that matters to you

Radiomimzy: You wish that the old canon of Mimzy being Alastor's girlfriend was still canon

Royalhalo: You hate Vaggie and you think that Charlie deserves better than her, and who better than the sugary sweet angel who was the first to hear Charlie out and argue in her favor when she found out the truth about the exterminations?

Cherridust: You are aggressively heterosexual and you believe that it is impossible for a man and a woman to be friends without one or both secretly harboring feelings for the other. You binge-read friends to lovers fics on Wattpad, and if a man so much as says hi to a woman, you will ship them

Cherrimoth: You like enemies to lovers, but in a bitch eating crackers kind of way. You either have a crush on someone that you love to hate from afar, or you want to fall in love with someone who hates you from afar

[volturiprincess]

could you do headcanons on the volturi having a mate who sings in the shower? like they don’t realize the vampires can hear them yk

Slow and steady wins the race right? I'm starting to work more on request, i know I been lacking but school really does keep me occupied. I hope this makes up for it. Enjoy💙

Singing In The Shower

Warnings: none that I am aware of

Felix:

The song choice “Toxic” by Britney Spears 

For some reason whenever you heard that song you just thought of him, so of course you added that to your playlist that you listen to when you shower 

So currently you find yourself belting this song with all your might without a single care in the world 

You don't even realize that everyone in the castle can hear you

Every. Single. Vampire. Can. Hear. You. 

Everyone was scattered around the castle but they stopped as you started singing this song

Everyone basically gravitated toward Felix

“Is that your mate?”

“Is she okay?”

“Why is she singing that song”

“Will someone stop that”

Felix loves to hear you sing, he thinks you sound like an angel but he does get slightly flustered when people bring up your singing 

When he does confront you, he’s a bit smug about it 

Clearly he knows that song is dedicated to him so he will respond with a “Well well, aren't we feeling scandalous today?”

When he tells you that the others can hear you singing, obviously you're embarrassed but at the end of the day when Demetri tells you that when you sing, Felix gets flustered

It's worth it without a doubt

You will keep singing and Felix won't stop you because he enjoys hearing you sing, even if your song choices get a bit….explicit (he’s into that anyways)

Demetri:

Song choice “Brooklyn Baby” by Lana Del Rey 

This vampire would join in if this was the case 

To the cheesiest of pop songs, to the most explicit rap song to a simple ballad that hits you in the soul, he will sing them with you (language is of no concern for him, he does after all know multiple languages)

He will tend to add songs into your “Shower playlist” that he would want to hear you sing or ones where you and him can duet 

He really does not care if others can hear you, he actually thinks of it as a mini concert in the bathroom. 

He even manage to add color changing bulbs to create that feeling of a rock concert 

Felix might tease you guys but those mini shower concerts are one of the many things you and Demetri bond over 

So yea the kings might have a talk with him about being able to hear “such vulgar” songs (mostly Caius thinking, Aro is intrigue while Marcus is whatever)

But that just makes him want to let you do you, he would never want to stop you in doing something you love 

What he likes the most about you singing in the shower is how you manage to outshine him during a rap song

He is shock how you manage to say all of the words without missing a beat

When you first found out the others can hear you (after many showers later), you were absolutely mortified at the realization

What do you mean they can hear me Demetri?” You guys have super hearing????

After many reassurance he tells you it's no problem  and that you singing in the shower is one of the highlights of his day (he likes that quirk of yours)

Alec:

“Espresso” by Sabrina Carpenter (before anyone comes out for me, I thought of this song for Alec because I was thinking about that one-shot I wrote for him called ‘Better than a Cup of Coffee’ plus this song wont leave my mind, i'm always ‘now he’s thinking bout me every night, isn't that sweet?’)

It started off as any other lovely day, you were getting ready to take your well needed shower, but couldn't start it until you got your music set 

As soon as the song above goes on you start grooving to it and singing it, not really thinking twice about it 

It was even your first time ever singing in the shower in the castle so again you didn't think twice 

But before you can even get to the last verse of the song, Alec appears on the other side of the shower door staring at you

(A little jump scare to be honest) while his face holds no emotion or reaction 

He informs you he could hear you all the way from the throne room

Instantly your heart drops and the color to your skin starts to loose its normal color at his words 

Your his shy, introverted, and calm mate yet here you are here acting the total opposite, everyone knows how you are so they don't try to push you out of your comfort zone but hearing you sing such a pump up song leaves them shook 

At that moment you want to want the earth to just swallow you from the pure embarrassment that you were facing

Alec being the darling he is, was comforting you and telling you “i thought you had such a sweet voice cara, i could get used to it”

His words touch your heart but you still feel worried of when you have to face the others

“I will be there for you, if they say something I'll use my gift, hmm?”

So much for thinking about coffee in the shower 

Jane:

“Mi Niña Traviesa” by Luis Coronel 

She’s the one mortified here 

Not that your singing is bad to her (sure your voice might of cracked slightly but she secretly thought it was cute) it's just the others started to tease her

She’s very protective of you, so hearing others making fun of you awakens her right away 

She won't hesitate to use her gift on others 

As for you side, your not even aware of what is happening to her or that others can hear you

For a while she does not confront you about your singing in the shower because she knows it would embarrass you 

Until two certain vamps who like to joke around and spend hours with you when Jane is away on a mission spilled the news 

They said it casually, they asked you what that song (from above) you were singing called

You felt your soul leave your body, they heard me!?

You sat there as you felt yourself slowly shutting down from embarrassment and while Felix and Demetri just kept on talking about it, unaware of your state 

You eventually left them and went off to your shared room 

You have never felt such embarrassment in your life

About to curl up a sharp yet soft voice stopped you

“Who made you cry?”

You didn’t even realize that you had small tears coming down until Jane pointed it out 

She was by your side immediately and it is when you tell her

She freezes for a moment thinking she might as well reveal the truth 

When you hear her say this you felt even worse but she mentioned you sounded like an angel

She didn't tell you because she knew you would stop 

With her saying she likes your singing you promised her you would sing for her sometimes if she joins you in the shower