#all that time blending different sauces and this is the only thing I needed

[windandwater]

I've seen endless posts and ideas about stuff you can add to instant ramen to make it a little bit more of a meal and yes add an egg and whatever vegetables but the number one thing I've found that improved the flavor. is to buy a bottle of sweet soy sauce for rice. and when you're done cooking just add it on top. I like to drain most of the the broth because I want noodles more than I want soup but it just blends well with those shitty seasoning packets.

this tastes the best with soy sauce flavor ramen but I can vouch for chicken ramen too. honestly that sweet soy sauce is the best thing I've ever found at H Mart. it goes on everything.

[xoxoladyaz]

Deep down, Steve knows that it's only a matter of time until he gets caught.

It feels like he's gone through the five stages of grief, like, twenty times. He can't count how many hours he's spent rationalizing it: what Eddie doesn't know won't hurt him, this is normal, people do it all the time, and besides, Eddie would feel completely betrayed if he knew and their relationship is so new that it's just not worth the risk. The absolute last thing he wants is to upset Eddie and this will just make him upset so really, Steve is doing the honorable thing by just not telling him, by pretending that he's not hiding anything, that everything is fine.

But it's not Eddie that catches him; hell, it isn't even someone in the Party; it's Jeff, Eddie's friend/Hellfire Club member/Corroded Coffin bandmate who shows up too early for D&D at Steve's one day and sees something he shouldn't have.

"This isn't what it looks like."

Jeff walks into the kitchen and frowns, like he's confused by what he's seeing and why Steve is so anxious, why he's sweating like he's just run a marathon. "It looks like you're blending a bunch of veggies together in a blender."

Shit. "Okay, it's exactly what it looks like."

Jeff still looks confused. "And this is a big deal because - "

"Because I haven't told Eddie that the 'special pasta sauce' that I've been using the last three months whenever we have spaghetti and meatballs is actually entirely made of, like, ten different kinds of vegetables," Steve rushes out, and Jeff's face smoothes in understanding.

"Oh, yeah, that makes sense. The dude has a weird vendetta against veggies."

Steve groans, slumping in relief. "Tell me about it. Do you know how hard it is to hide veggies in every single meal that I make for him? Because if I don't, then he's never going to eat them, and I'm worried about his health enough as it is."

Jeff nods. "It's the smoking, right?"

"The smoking, and the drinking, and I know he's sneaking out to smoke with Jon and Argyle, but he doesn't exercise and he only eats highly processed cereal with loads of sugar and I just don't want him to have a heart attack before the age of forty!"

"Hey, hey, Steve, man, your secret's safe with me." Jeff holds his hands up in supplication. "And for the record, I'm on your side. The dude is like a feral raccoon."

"I know," Steve sighs. "But he's my feral raccoon."

That makes Jeff start laughing. "If it makes you feel any better, my mom and I have been doing the same thing for years now. If you want, we could exchange recipes sometime."

"Really?" Steve perks up and now, now he's excited. "That would be great!"

"Sick. Need some help with the meatballs?"

"Please!"

And that is how Eddie and Gareth and Phil and Dustin and Mike and Lucas and Erica and Will find them later, chatting and laughing while Steve tosses his homemade noodles into his now-simmering pasta sauce, Jeff sitting on the kitchen island and drinking a beer.

This time, it's Jeff who looks like he's seen a ghost. "This isn't what it looks like."

"Oh?" Eddie asks, and his voice is totally controlled, which means that Jeff is screwed. "So you're not hanging out with my boyfriend and making him do that cute little blushy giggle that is my cute blushy giggle?"

"Eddie!" Steve scolds, but it's too late, Jeff knows his fate is sealed.

"Okay, it's exactly what it looks like."

(Jeff's rogue is caught in the blast zone when Dustin's ranger kills a large acid toad. Still, he can't feel too mad when he sees Eddie smirk and then lick the veggie sauce out of his pasta bowl.)

[blegh-110]

Have I found you, flightless bird? (4/?)

Pairing: Soft!Dark!Tangerine x Fem!Crybaby!Reader

Summary: In which you’re resistance against Tangerine is breaking.

Chapter Warnings: Stockholm syndrome, kissing, SMUT: fingering, spanking

Word Count: 8.3k

You don’t know how much time has passed by since you were first taken here. You tried to keep track at first and were doing well, but then the days started to blend together and you couldn’t remember what you’d done the day before. Which wasn’t much.

Even though there were many rooms for your entertainment, you refused to use them because using them means giving into Tangerine. And that was the absolute, last thing you wanted.

As you lay in bed and begin going over your day, you have a realization that you will have to wake up and do it all over again; absolutely nothing. 

-

There are a few times where you’re so overcome with anger towards Tangerine, and his actions that he believed were acts of kindness and love, that you take it out on anything and aren’t fearful of the consequences. Like right now, when he’s made you dinner, nothing out of the ordinary from the daily routine. But today you are feeling especially enraged, just staring at Tangerine makes you want to scream. You sit at the dinner table and watch him cook one of your favorite meals. You can’t look away from him as your negative emotions rise, and you have no interest in looking away and calming yourself down. No, you want to continue being livid and get a reaction out of the deranged man, just so you can have more reason to loathe him.

Tangerine begins cutting your food and that just about does it. Again, this is nothing out of the ordinary, he always cuts your food into smaller bits. But today is not one of your best emotionally, the fact that he believed you weren’t capable enough to cut your own food set you off. But that wasn’t the reason why Tangerine cuts your food, he just wants to take care of you and not let you lift a single finger. 

 He walks over to the dinner table and places the plate in front of you. At this point, Tangerine can see your emotional state and is just waiting for the moment you snap. But he thinks you’ll act out verbally, so when you pick up your plate of food and throw it across the room, he freezes. The closest you ever did something like that was on that very first day, when you had tried to escape. 

The glass shatters on the kitchen floor and the sauce splatters everywhere. You look at Tangerine and hope to see his eyebrows furrowed together paired with a furious frown, but he only sighs and walks back to the stove, making you another plate. 

“Please eat, you’ve hardly had anything today, love.” He says when he comes back, then leaves a sweet kiss on your cheek and tends to the mess, which leaves you feeling a mix of emotions. You’re confused, but at the same time relieved, as well as empty and unsatisfied. Worst of all, you suddenly felt guilt slowly fill up your empty stomach as you watched Tangerine clean up your mess from the floor. 

And when he was getting you ready for bed and brushing your hair, he spoke about what you did, and you feel awful. 

“(Y/N), what you did tonight was not okay. I understand you are still getting used to living here and maybe you don’t know how to deal with that, which is okay, but you have to tell me you aren’t feeling alright.” Tangerine speaks. He chooses his words carefully, wanting to get it into your head that the way you acted was out of line, but he doesn’t want to make you feel like a bad person. You just needed a little reminder.

But you’re extremely sensitive, and the smallest scolding made you upset at yourself and cry. And this is no different. 

You nod your head guiltily, not wanting to speak and risk breaking down. All you want is to be held, like the first time you met him on the train. He was so sturdy but soft. You need to feel one hand smoothing down your hair and the other rubbing circles on your back. The closest you come to that is when he takes your hand in his and leads you to your shared bed, where he lifts up the comforter and lets you crawl into bed. Instead of joining you, he begins walking out.  

“Where are you going?” You whispered, the ball in your throat not allowing you to speak any louder. 

“I’m sleeping in a different room tonight,”

At this moment, you want to beg him not to go and promise him that you’ll never behave like that again, but you say nothing. Tangerine sees the heartbroken look on your face and is ready to backtrack on your punishment, but he knows what he’s doing has to be done. 

“I don’t want to do this, there is nothing more I have enjoyed than sleeping next to you, but I need you to understand that there are consequences to your actions.” He says while holding your face in his hands. 

“If you need anything, come out and tell me, I’ll just be in the guest room, okay?”

You nod your head and stare at his blurry figure through your teary eyes. Once he leaves (without a kiss) and the door closes, the tears fall and you become frustrated and confused.

Why am I acting this way? You think.

You should be happy that you have a night to yourself without tight arms wrapped around you. Instead, you’re cold and lonely as you lay in bed. And so incredibly guilty to the point where you think you’ve ruined Tangerine’s thoughts about you. You convince yourself that he hates you now, that your actions truly angered him so much that he didn’t want to see you or be near you. 

As you silently cry yourself to sleep, you can only agree with the bad thoughts and sink deeper into your insecurities and sadness. 

-

Tangerine is quick to get out of bed and get dressed when he wakes up. His plan was to get up early and make you a nice breakfast, an extra special one because you took your punishment very well and he feels awful for doing that to you. But he ditches that plan because he wants to see you as soon as possible and check to see how you’re doing. 

He opens the door and is greeted with a sad sight. You’re already awake, you have been for the past hour, and you’re sitting up with slumped shoulders staring at the wall with sad eyes. You don’t turn to him when the door opens, you don’t even notice it, too spaced out. 

“Oh, darling.” He says to himself and walks towards you. You see him in the corner of your eye but don’t dare to look at him. 

“Let’s go downstairs and get something in your stomach, yeah?” He whispers and tucks a strand of hair behind your ear. His soothing voice and gentle touch are already making you feel better, but that guilt is still there, heavy on your chest.  Every bad thought you had created throughout the night only clouded your judgment. You feel like a burden.

“C’mon.” Tangerine takes your hand in his rough ones and stands you up from the sheets. 

Once in the kitchen, that awful feeling on your chest spreads to your stomach, making your hunger worse. Thankfully, Tangerine doesn’t let go of your hand or stop any of his physical touch, he can clearly see the regretful state you are in. 

For just a second your heart drops when he lets go of your hand, but then you find yourself sitting on top of the counter. The coldness on your thighs not only makes you shiver, but it also deepens you into your sorrowful mood. You’re distressed and hyperaware of everything, you felt yourself on the edge of crumbling into a ball and breaking down. 

While you felt your world about to crash, Tangerine glanced at you and once again felt his own heart break. He saw your stiff body, furrowed eyebrows, and anxious eyes filling up with tears, and decided that you’ve had enough. 

Then Tangerine’s arms are around you, engulfing your entire being in a hug. And all of those bad feelings and thoughts are gone in an instant. His tight grip brings you back down to earth and makes you let out the breath you were holding since last night. 

“You did so well for me, (Y/N). So proud of you,” 

“Missed you so much last night, couldn’t even sleep properly without you,”

“M’not letting you go tonight.”

His words make you start crying and grip his shirt, for the first time you completely melt into him and the endless caresses. It’s enough to make you confess some of those upsetting feelings.

“M’sorry, feel so bad. And I was so cold and lonely and-” You don’t finish your sentence when a cry leaves your mouth, your words also take an effect on Tangerine when he somehow holds you closer. 

“All is forgiven, my love. It’s over now.” And he gives you a long kiss on your cheek, the first one since your punishment,  that gives you butterflies and makes you dizzy. His affection and gentle kisses to your face make you want to return it, to wrap your arms around him and press your mouth against his. You shake your head to clear your mind, yet you nuzzle your head into his shoulder for more comfort. 

After holding on desperately to each other for a while longer, Tangerine has to tear himself away from you despite your whines and your pretty eyes threatening to spill more tears. 

“I know, I know, v’got to get you some food. What do you feel like, lovely?” 

You have trouble answering, getting flashbacks from last night. You also don’t feel like you’re able to speak properly, so you shrug your shoulders.

“That’s alright. I can make some pancakes, waffles, french toast-” You perk up at french toast, your unknowing craving suddenly being solved. 

As he makes your meal, you’re still sitting on the counter watching him with many thoughts. You feel a certain fondness for Tangerine. It was something about you letting out your emotions in a nasty way, and instead of hurting you like you thought he would, Tangerine made you another plate full of food and pleaded for you to eat. He didn’t hurt you or berate you or call you names, like your parents would’ve. Not only that, but you couldn’t take your eyes off of his figure.

Luckily, he was turned away from you, now cutting up fresh fruit. Your eyes couldn’t help but wander from his broad shoulders to his forearms to his ringed fingers. Despite this, there was nothing that could make you admit how attractive he was in his white button up shirt and his dress pants. Then you look down at your own attire and feel not only underdressed but gross as well. Even though your pajamas were cute, a short lilac nightgown with lace hemming, you felt it did not compare to Tangerine’s dark blue suit. Pair that with your teary, wet face and stuffy nose after your breakdown, you feel ugly. 

You are once again too caught up in your own thoughts to notice Tangerine walking back to you, the feeling of his body sliding between your thighs brings you back to him. His closeness and the smell of him makes you shy.

Tangerine then brings up both of his hands, one has a firm grip on your chin to hold you still, and the other holds a napkin that wipes away your tears with a touch so light you can barely feel it. But it's enough to dry your face. While he’s finishing up, you have the chance to get a closer look at him. Your breath gets caught in your throat when you notice the first few buttons of his shirt were unbuttoned, showing just a glimpse of his chest and his gold necklace. The contrast of his masculine look and his gentle actions makes you swallow. 

Tangerine notices this and smirks. His hand on your chin drops down to hold your jaw, making the butterflies in your stomach spread all over your body. 

“Almost done now, just hold still for me.” Tangerine whispers and wipes your other cheek. You feel a sound bubbling in your throat but you suppress it. Unfortunately, it comes out when he brings his hand down with the napkin and gives you a firm kiss at the corner of your mouth, still with his hand holding your jaw. 

It takes everything within you not to bring him back to you and lay a real kiss on his lips, it takes all of your self control not to cry when he puts just a little bit of distance between the two of you. 

“Thank you, darling.”

“You’re welcome.” 

Tangerine smiles at your quick response before feeding you some french toast. You hum at the sweet taste of the dish and the warm feeling it gives you in your stomach. He gives you another forkful when you feel syrup on the corner of your mouth, but just as you’re about to wipe it away, Tangerine beats you to it. Using his thumb to swipe it away and putting it in his mouth to get rid of the sticky feeling. You shift your eyes away at the scene, your shyness only becoming more apparent. 

“Look so pretty right now.” Tangerine says while fiddling with the strap of your nightgown. You feel like you’re about to burst at the feeling of his fingers against your skin, but you want more. 

“Thank you.” You mumble when he puts a strawberry slice in your mouth with his fingers. 

You’re frustrated. Even though he’s giving you a lot of attention and soft touches, you want more. And even that itself frustrates you even more. You should not want this man's hands anywhere near you. But it’s hard not to when he’s breathing down your neck, feeding you himself, and looking so handsome. This would’ve been a dream come true for you if it weren’t for the circumstances.

You don’t voice any of your thoughts. Instead, you let Tangerine continue feeding you.

-

It was about a week later after the dinner incident and your punishment. You try not to think about it too much, just remembering how you felt alone in your room made your heart hurt. And as a result, something inside of you changed. 

Since that night and the morning after, you had a need and a certain hunger for Tangerine. 

You wake up in the morning to his kisses on your skin. It was nothing out of the ordinary. But the past few days were different. Instead of turning your head away or turning your back to him, you let him kiss all over your face down to your neck where he becomes just a bit rougher. 

You let out a sigh when you feel one of his hands rub up and down your back, taking away the morning chill. But the goosebumps only come back when you feel him begin to suck on your skin for the first time. The feeling of his teeth on your sensitive skin makes you moan and clutch onto his bare shoulders, where you feel his muscles. 

The two of you stay like this for who knows how long. You're completely comfortable in Tangerine’s warm arms, feeling blissed out with just him mouthing your neck and touching you all over your body. All you can do is lay down and let him ravish you. 

You then hiss when he bites a little too hard, but the pain shoots down to your core, making your eyes flutter open. You weren’t sure when you last felt this way. You didn’t exactly have time before to go out and have fun, especially with men. You’d gone on a few dates and even fewer hookups with guys who really only cared for their pleasure, always leaving you dissatisfied. But you figured that was normal and got used to douchebags. Just the small amount of their attention, even if it was just for the night, was enough for you. Which was why you weren’t fighting Tangerine off of you. 

Since that night on the train, he has always given you his undivided attention. And because of your rocky history with men, you felt yourself slowly basking in it. Not only because it had been a while since a man was affectionate with you, but also because Tangerine was clearly focusing on your pleasure. When your fingers clenched his shoulders and a breathy moan escaped your lips, he only provided more of his sucking and kissing. 

You feel Tangerine just about to pull away to look at his attack on your neck, but your whine and tightening arms stop his movements. Despite his ability to pass through your arms without having to try, he is easily pulled closer to you. 

Once you’ve pulled him back down, the need to plant your mouth on his comes back. The two of you haven’t shared a kiss yet, since you’ve been with him, it has only gone as far as kisses on the face. And it was Tangerine giving those out. You weren’t comfortable enough to give the man the same affection before.

But now, you can’t take your eyes off of him and his pretty lips. Nor can you stop your hands from rubbing his bicep up and down. Your eyes go from his lips to the entirety of his face. The morning light behind him made him look ironically angelic. His hair was curly and unkempt, you couldn’t help but trail your hand up his arm, over his shoulder, up his neck, and finally running your hand over his scalp. You scratched lightly and began twirling a strand of hair around your finger. You were completely captivated by him. 

Tangerine’s own eyes began to flutter shut, your touch igniting a fire inside his stomach. 

Testing the waters, you stare at his lips above you and slowly lay a small kiss on them. 

There was no tongue or open mouths. Just a peck, which left Tangerine having to hold himself back from bruising your lips, in a I-care-for-you-so-much kind of way. He just has so many emotions and wants that have been bottled up since the first time he saw you. But from now on, he needs to let you be the one to call the shots and be in control. Your relationship would go nowhere if he always had complete power over you. The only exception being laying kisses on your face, that is something he can’t help himself with. You’re just too pretty and sweet not to love up on.

The feeling of your lips on Tangerine’s makes your heart stop. So you lay another one, this time staying just a bit longer.

You sigh into his mouth when he begins moving his lips against yours, catching your bottom lip between his own. You hesitantly began moving along with him, parting your mouth slightly and gasping when Tangerine’s tongue slips into your mouth. You open wider for him and let him lick into your mouth, you can’t help letting a few moans out. 

Your fingers grip the strands of his hair, tugging him closer, almost painfully, against your mouth when you feel Tangerine sucking on your tongue. You’ve kissed boys before, but never like this. The ones before, you were cautious and careful about how you were kissing, and the guys were messy and slobbery. Everything was very uncoordinated. 

But this was something else. Tangerine knew exactly what to do and when to do it. It was also messy, but not in a way where you wanted to pull away and wipe your mouth. You wanted more, you wanted to taste Tangerine more. This time, you didn’t care for what you were doing, only focusing on tasting his lips. 

Tangerine then pulls away, just to take another look at you, but not without having to fight you. He tries to lift his head up, but your arms tighten themselves around his neck and you move up with him, desperate not to let him go.

“Let me see you, pretty.” He says in between kisses, finding hard himself to pull away, but you relent. His words go in one ear and out the other, except for “pretty”. That has you pulling him in even more. But unfortunately, Tangerine is way bigger and stronger than you.

With his lips still on yours, he takes one arm and easily removes your hand from his neck and does so with the other, pinning them down above your head on your pillow. Without your grip, he now is able to take a look at you, but not without laying just a few more bruising kisses. Once he finally pulls away, the sight of you has him groaning and he can’t believe how beautiful and already wrecked you looked with just some silly morning kissing. 

Your hair is all over the pillows and bushy from his hands, your eyes are half open and begging him to do something, and your mouth is releasing fast pants from your priority to kiss than to breathe. Your chest goes up and down and you look so fucking gorgeous in your little pink nightgown that has ridden up your thigh, just under the spot you both want him to be. He’s in a trance just staring at you, but is soon taken out when he hears your whine and feels you trying to release yourself against his hands. Tangerine, although also wants to continue and go further if you let him, decides he wants to mess and play with you for a bit. 

“Awe, is my baby needy?’ He asks and comes close to your lips, just a hair away from touching them. With teary eyes and a pretty pout, you nod up at him. You’ve now been with Tangerine long enough to know that that combination is more than enough to get what you want. You’ve used it on multiple occasions. But Tangerine wills himself not to give in to you. 

He coos and gives you a faux pout, “Well, that’s just too bad, darling.”

He goes back to nipping at your neck before placing both of your hands in one of his, taking his free one to lightly grip your neck. The feeling makes you close your eyes and moan loudly. You’ve been wanting his hands around your throat for some time now, since that morning he wiped away your tears in the kitchen. 

Tangerine takes his free hand and slides it under your back, pulling you up towards him and making you arch your back. That’s when you feel it, his bulge against your stomach. You gasp when you can feel how big it is as Tangerine begins grinding against your stomach, the size of his cock making you simultaneously nervous and excited. You wonder if it would ever fit inside of you. 

You attempt to free yourself from his hand, wanting to touch Tangerine anywhere you could. But he grabs your leg and hikes it around his waist, now rubbing himself onto your core. You let out another moan before Tangerine catches your mouth in a bruising kiss, tongue in your mouth and lapping at your own. 

You feel overwhelmed, all your senses feel like they’ve been dialed up to the maximum. All you can hear are Tangerine’s grunts into your mouth, all you feel is hand rubbing your thigh, even with your eyes closed in bliss, all you can see is him. You taste him on your tongue as you lick into his mouth. It’s all so much, so much pleasure all at once, but it’s still not enough. 

You let out a high pitched moan when his cock rubs against your clit just right. The only thing between the two of you are your panties and his boxers. 

Tangerine finally releases your hands from his and takes his other one off of you, then raises himself up. This allows you to catch your breath for a split second before your being flipped over onto your stomach. Your face suddenly in the sheets when you feel hands on your hips, which raises them up. You attempt to lift your upper body up, but a firm hand on your back pushes you back down. 

“Stay there.” Tangerine says, his tone making your stomach flutter and eyes close. 

Tangerine hums to himself at your position, ass up and face down. Because of the short length of your nightgown, it has risen up over your ass, allowing Tangerine a very nice view of your floral panties. 

You sigh into your pillow when you feel hands on your bum, kneading gently. Then you hear a loud smack and sting on your ass, the feeling making you gasp and rise up on your arms. But your shoved back down just as quickly as you got up, then Tangerine lays two more smacks, making you whine.

“I thought I told you to stay there.”

“M’sorry.” You say, your words muffled into your pillow. 

Tangerine hums and thinks for a moment, knowing that this is most likely the first type of sexual experience you’ve had that involved having to control yourself and listen to your partner. He decides he’ll let your disobedience slide, then you and him will have a discussion later about the type of sex you enjoy and what you both want. 

The lack of words from Tangerine makes your heart crack, maybe he didn’t hear you?

“I said I’m sorry.” You say once more, not sure exactly what you’re hoping for. 

“I know, I heard you. Thank you for apologizing, darling.” He says, then lays a gentle kiss on the small of your back. You squirm under his lips, happy to be on his good side. 

“You’re welco-'' You're cut off by your own gasp when you feel a hand cupping your core and single digit rubbing your clit. You begin panting into the pillow and moving your hips to Tangerine’s hand. 

“That feel nice?” Tangerine asks, holding back a groan at how desperate you are. 

“Uh-huh.” Is all you can say with closed eyes. 

You try with all of your effort to stay in your position, you fist your hands in the sheets, trying to find some balance between the pleasure and trying not to get too caught up in it. You’re fearful at what Tangerine will do, but at the same excited about it. But it all becomes too much when he begins to rub you more roughly and at the same time, spanks you again so hard that you yelp into the sheets. 

“Alright, that’s quite enough.” Tangerine is quick with his movements as he places a hand on your upper back, right under your neck, and shoves your head back down roughly. He then takes both of your hands and pins them behind your back, and continues to caress your cunt. 

“S-sorry!” You gasp wetly, eyes rolling to the back of your head when he begins to rub you quickly, his entire palm practically shaking beneath your cunt. Even with your underwear on, you both can hear just how wet you are. The sound of your wetness and your moans bouncing off of the walls of your room. 

Tangerine feels you stop your humping against his palm and sees your body shaking, you’re close. For just a second, he stops rubbing your clothed covered cunt, making you cry out and wiggle your ass, and pulls your underwear to the side. You feel the cool air hit you and are left curious as to what Tangerine is going to do. 

You cry out when you feel his fingers against you, teasing your hole as he circles a single finger around it. 

“You want my fingers, dove?” Tangerine asks, pressing his finger against your hole. You nod your head against your pillow as much as you can, the angle your neck is at making it difficult. 

“Oh, I don’t know about that. Can barely put just one of m’fingers in there, unless I shove it in.”

“Please, please, just want one.” You beg into the sheets, your words barely audible.

“What’s that? You don’t want it?” Tangerine smirks and goes back to circling two fingers around your clit. You shriek and shake your head, wiggling your ass in a futile attempt to find any sort of touch. 

“No, no, no, I do want it! Pleas-” Your cries are cut off when you feel a large finger slowly enter you, that’s all it takes for you to shake and crumble beneath Tangerine. You groan and arch your back, taking more of Tangerine’s finger. You feel yourself toeing the line of pain and pleasure, his finger feels so fucking good but he really does have to force it in. 

“Oh, you’re coming already? But I’ve barely touched you.” Tangerine coos at how easy it was to get your body trembling. 

Poor girl, he thinks. You really haven’t been touched in a long while. 

He slowly retracts his finger all the way out, before slowly pushing it all the way in, your tightness making his movements slow. You drool into the pillows as your mouth hangs open with no sound coming out. Your orgasm takes everything within you away. 

You sob when Tangerine doesn’t stop his movements, not letting you take a single moment to settle down and collect yourself. You try to remove your hands from his grip, then you feel a rain of smacks on your ass and his hand returns to your sopping cunt.

“Please! Ah!” You beg loudly, though you’re not sure what for. For Tangerine to stop? For him to keep going? 

Tears soon fall down your cheeks, joining the drool on your pillow. The mess is spread onto your cheek as you scream and shake. You feel your juice slowly drip down your thighs, but you pay no mind to it as you’re quickly brought closer and closer to your second orgasm. You feel the sweat on your neck and on your forehead. You’re a mess, but Tangerine finds you-so far gone in the pleasure- so beautiful. 

You groan and tremble again when Tangerine just slightly curls his fingers, hitting that spot inside of you that makes your eyes roll back. But the pleasure soon becomes too much when you feel his thumb circling your ass and you lose the very little control you have. Your hands helplessly trying to grab onto anything you can reach to ground you from the pleasure. Fortunately, Tangerine readjusts his grip on your wrists and lets you hold his hand as you turn your face in the pillow and sob into it, your shoulders shuddering as your juices coat his finger and leak out of your hole. 

“Oh, that’s a good girl.”

You think you black out for a moment at his words. The praise sinking deep into your bones and going straight to your core, making you twitch.

“Thank you, thank you-” Is all you can say as you ride out your high, your mind melting away with pleasure. 

Tangerine stops his movements, but doesn’t remove his finger. He enjoys the way your small hole clenches onto his finger, almost like you're begging him not to remove it. When he sees that your breath has finally calmed down into hiccups, he slowly takes out his finger, making you whine and arch your back. 

He finally lets go of your hands, gently taking both of them and placing them beside you so as to not hurt your arms. 

“You’re welcome, my love.” He whispers before leaving a gentle kiss to your wet cheeks, tasting your salty tears. Tangerine puts his hands back on your hips, his touch gentle, and lowers them back on the bed. He then takes off your underwear, tossing them in your hamper where he notices that it’s filled up. He makes a mental note to do your laundry sometime today, maybe after work he thinks. For now, his focus is on putting you back together with a nice bath and a warm breakfast. 

Tangerine goes back to you and pulls down your nightgown, covering your bum then patting it softly as he sits next to your tired body. 

“Gotta take a bath now, love.” He whispers, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. 

“M’tired.” You yawn and knuckle at your eyes. Just the idea of having to sit up and walk to the bathroom is exhausting, but the sticky mess between your thighs and the wetness on your cheek says otherwise. 

“Okay.” Is the only response you get before you feel Tangerine get up and walk away. The sudden disappearance makes your eyes open. You sit up despite your arms and back aching and begging for you to lay back down. You don’t know what to do.

Did he just leave? Where did he go? Is he coming back? 

Your thoughts are interrupted when you hear the faucet of your bath being turned on and the sound of running water. 

You lay back down and close your eyes, assuming Tangerine was the one who was taking a shower. Just as you feel yourself about to slip into your slumber, the water finally shuts off and you feel an arm sliding itself under your back and another arm going under your knees. 

You make a noise of discomfort, you just want to lay back down. 

“I know, I know. But you’ll feel so much better after a bath.” Tangerine says softly, his voice is enough to send you back to slumber. 

You open your eyes and see that you’re in the bathroom, and the tub is filled with bubbles. Tangerine bends down with you in his arms to put you down and send you back on your feet, you shiver and wrap your arms around yourself when your feet hit the cold floor. Tangerine sees this and mentally scolds himself for not placing you on one of the bathmats. 

“Wasn’t sure which scent you wanted to use since you haven’t used any of those.” He points to a basket filled with many types of bath bombs, all different sizes and colors and fun shapes. Your eyebrows furrow, since when did you have that?

Tangerine smiles at your tilted head and confused face, “they’re in this cupboard,” then he points to one of the cupboards you hadn’t even opened yet. 

“Oh, okay. Thank you.” 

“I’ll lay out some clothes while you’re in here. And if you want, I would like you to come down and we can eat together.”

“I would like that, Tangerine.”

“Wonderful, I’ll see you soon, love.” Tangerine says, but not without a gentle hand cradling your cheek and a sweet kiss on your lips that leaves you stunned. He quietly leaves the bathroom and shuts the door.

You get that feeling in your stomach when you miss someone as soon as they’re gone, but you remind yourself that you’ll see him again in about thirty minutes, with some good food. You shyly smile at the thought of having breakfast together. Hopefully he’s in one of those moods where he sits you on his lap. You could do it yourself, but knowing he’s the one who wants you that close to him makes you blush. 

Before getting into the bath, you decide to explore the bathroom a little more and open the drawers you hadn’t even touched. Despite Tangerine telling you on multiple occasions that “this is your new home” and “you can do as you please here”, the house is still very much new to you. It feels wrong to open every single cabinet and go look through it or go to any room and lounge or take all the food you want from the kitchen. You feel like you have to ask for permission for everything and anything. And up until very recently, your walls are starting to crack.

You open one of the drawers and gasp. Sitting in it are many more bath bombs that immediately fill your nose. Next, you open a cabinet and in it are different types of body washes from brands you’d always wanted. You marvel at all the different pretty bottles and colors and scents. 

This continues on with you opening the remainder of the drawers and cabinets, which are all filled with the most delicious smelling lotions, shampoos, conditioners, body scrubs, body oils, and more. By the time you’re done, a good fifteen minutes have passed by and you struggle to pick which product you want to use. In the end, you choose a body wash, lotion, and perfume from the brand Philosophy called fresh cream, the smell reminding you of freshly baked cookies and cakes. 

As you get into the bath, you can’t help but feel just a little bit giddy and excited at the thought of Tangerine pulling you close and liking the way you smell. Maybe he’ll kiss my neck and bite me again, you think as you sink into the bubbles and perfectly warmed water. 

Your mind starts to wander when your body begins to relax in the water.

Whatever you did with Tangerine was great. Really, really great, you think. 

The stuff he did and said to you, you were very surprised you had such a responsive and good reaction to them. No one’s ever treated you that way in bed. 

Tangerine was so… assertive and demanding and rough, especially. You liked the way he held and restrained your arms from touching him, it made you have no choice but to take what he was giving you. You liked that you couldn’t pull him closer or push him away, he was making you take the pleasure he was providing you. 

And the way he talked to you! The butterflies appear in your stomach at the thought. 

The way he gave you orders, and got angry when you didn’t follow through them. It wasn’t on purpose, he was just making you feel so good you couldn’t stay still. But then he really got rough again and restrained you again. 

You squeeze your thighs together at the thought of his rough hand on your back and pushing your face in the sheets with a great force. 

But it was after all of that is what made you want to run up to him and kiss him again, he was so sweet and gentle, from what you remember. Just like when you first met him. It was all pet names and soft touches and some kisses here and there. Thinking about this reminds you that he’s waiting downstairs for you. You quickly finish washing yourself and get out of the tub.

Following this is your skin care and makeup, which you apply just a little bit of lipstick, spreading it with your fingers to give it more of a natural look. Then finish your lips off with some cherry scented lip gloss. Next, you apply some mascara and blush, and you’re done for now. It’s the same story as the drawers, the amount of makeup is a little much, but you still love it. It’s just going to take some getting used to, having so much in such a small amount of time. You want to take your time exploring and not just dive headfirst into it all.

And lastly, before you get dressed, you apply the sweet lotion on your legs and arms.

When you’re done in the bathroom, you stand in front of your mirror in the outfit Tangerine had laid out for you. A white flowy sundress with a tiny red floral print, paired with a small red cardigan and socks. Although you love the entirety of the outfit, you decide not to wear the cardigan as you want Tangerine to smell as much of the lotion on you as possible. 

The final touch to your look is the perfume with the same scent as the lotion and bodywash. And with one last squeeze of your hair with a towel, you’re off downstairs and trying not to appear too eager. 

-

Perfect timing, Tangerine thinks as he’s setting down the last plate of chocolate croissants on the table when he hears your footsteps coming down the stairs. His heart soars when he sees you, freshly showered with wet hair and the cute little dress he layed out for you. 

You’re very clearly nervous as you sit down, so much that the amount of your favorite foods right in front of you don’t register in your mind. When you see Tangerine, back in his goddamn suit, you’re reminded of the morning’s events, making you feel self-conscious once again.

Did Tangerine like the dress on you?

Has he noticed your light makeup?

Does he like the way you look?

Is the smell of fresh cream too much?

Tangerine makes his way towards you, frowning at your refusal to look at him and your worried eyes. 

You jump when you see the chair next to you move from the corner of your eye, and you're slightly disappointed when Tangerine doesn’t immediately pull you into his lap and wrap his arms around you. 

“Fancy some croissants, love?”

You nod your head and look at the table, mouth quickly watering at all the food. 

It’s silent for a while after Tangerine fills up your plate and glass with apple juice. You wonder why he’s being so distant, usually he’s feeding you and kissing all over your face. He feels so… far away, despite being right next to you. Your eyes begin to water at the thought of him regretting what he did. You very much enjoyed it and thought he did as well, but you figure now you’re wrong. Then you realize he didn’t even cum. You didn’t do anything for him. 

You struggle to finish up your food with a lump in your throat, as well as trying not to breathe too much through your nose because then Tangerine will know you’re close to crying. But you could only pretend for so long. 

Tangerine’s head quickly turns to you when he hears the first sniffle, then he puts down his fork when he sees you trembling.

“Hey, hey, what’s wrong? C’mere.” Tangerine says softly, trying to remain calm at your sudden burst of tears. He takes your hands and gently pulls you towards him off of your chair, some of his nerves going away when you seat yourself on his lap and lay your head on his shoulder. 

“I’m s-sorry.” You hiccup. You feel your breath quicken and that feeling in your chest where you know you’re going to start taking uncontrollable deep breaths. 

“For what? I don’t underst- here, drink some water.” Tangerine places a glass in front of you and you immediately go for it, closing your eyes and letting the cold water soothe you. Your lips away from the cup and sigh, taking deep breaths to calm yourself. It helps when you feel a hand slowly rubbing circles on your back. 

Feeling exhausted again, you lay your head back on Tangerine’s shoulder. 

“How are your arms? Do they hurt?” Tangerine asks while massaging your biceps, that’s when he notices how nice you smell. He noses your damp hair and kisses your head. 

“No, they’re okay, thank you.” You say quietly and tilt your head, his nose in your hair tickling you. 

“Can I see you, please?” 

It takes a while for you to muster up the courage to just sit up, your head feeling heavy. Tangerine is quick to hold your cheeks and wipe away your tears, he shakes his head at your sad eyes. Seeing you so upset makes him feel upset too.

“Love,” He pauses, reminding himself to choose his next words very carefully, “I’m a little concerned right now, what’s wrong?” He begins to panic when sees your lip trembling and your head turn away.

“Is it something about this morning?”

You nod your head.

“How do you feel? You didn’t like it?”

“No, I liked it. I just-” 

Tangerine’s head perks up, trying not to show how pleased he is with your answer.  

“Just what? You can tell me, I won’t be mad, I promise.” Tangerine brushes away the strands of hair that are in your face, he doesn't want any sort of barrier between the two of you. That way there can be no hiding from you and you can clearly see his own face. 

You take a deep breath.

“I didn’t make you… you didn’t-” You struggle to say the word, it’s humiliating to admit.

“Oh, that’s alright. Wasn’t really focused on myself to be honest. I just wanted to make you feel nice is all.”

You’re once again stunned at his words. He wasn’t focused on himself and his own pleasure? But instead on you? The thought and gesture makes you look down at your hands, your eyes looking anywhere besides the man right in front of you. You’re afraid you’ll burst if you look at Tangerine any longer. 

“Oh, okay. Thank you.” You smile softly as you trace the small flowers on your dress. Tangerine smiles at your bashfulness, it’s so easy to get you so flustered and squirmy. It’s a sight he loves to see.

“There’s nothing to thank me for, love. Should be thanking you, I reckon. I loved seeing you like that.”

“Tangerine, stop it.” You whine and hide your face in his neck, a smile spread wide on your face as you wrap your arms around his neck. Tangerine laughs and pinches your sides, making you yelp.

“C’mon, let me see your face.”

You whine quietly into his neck before slowly removing yourself from your hiding spot, your cheeks on fire and a small pout on your lips. 

“Oh, there she is. So pretty today, aren’t you?” Tangerine whispers and strokes your cheek, making them heat up. 

“May I kiss you?”

“Yes, please.” You whisper breathlessly and his lips are on yours in an instant, making you moan. 

This kiss is different from this morning. It’s slow and deep and all open mouthed. It makes you dizzy, especially when he’s got one arm wrapped tightly around your waist and his other hand has a firm hold on your cheek. He’s not letting you go anytime soon and you’re okay with that. You just want him to keep petting your tongue with his and gently nipping at your bottom lip. 

But then he’s pulling away with an unhappy sigh. 

“I really hate to go, but I’ve got to get to work now.” As much as he doesn’t want to go, he needs to. He’s already very late thanks to the morning’s activities and breakfast. He knows he’s going to get an earful when he meets with Lemon. But he almost backtracks on his words when he sees your shoulders fall and feels your hands remove themselves from around his neck . The realization that he is leaving makes both of your hearts hurt. 

“Oh, okay.” You repeat your words from earlier, but with disappointment. You also look down at your hands again, you don’t want Tangerine to see you like this, so obviously upset. He sighs at you beginning to pull away from him. 

“I don’t want to leave you, please believe me.” He whispers in your ear, making you shiver and eventually curl up to him. Tangerine relaxes and starts to lightly scratch your scalp.

“I’ll make it up to you tonight, how’s that sound?”

“That sounds good.” You say as you play with his necklace. 

“Wonderful. Let’s start with dinner, what would you like?” 

You're quick with your answer. It was one of the first meals he made you during your first week in the house. You remember being angry and annoyed with how delicious it was, and as much as you wanted to throw a fit and not eat it- just to make Tangerine angry- you couldn’t resist it. 

“I really liked that one soup you made with the- I forgot what you called it- noky?”

“Oh, gnocchi?” Tangerine smiles. 

“Yes, that one. That was really good, I really liked it. You should make it again, please.” You ramble, attempting to forget the awful way you pronounced the dish. But you only dig yourself further into embarrassment, making you sigh and cringe at yourself. 

“Thank you, that’s very nice,” Tangerine kisses your cheek and continues, “I’ll stop by the store and pick up some of the ingredients. Anything else?”

You think for a moment.

“I think dessert would be good too.”

“Alright, what will it be?”

“Mochi, th-the ones with the strawberry inside of it.”

“You’ve got it.”

The two of you continue with your conversation, it mostly being Tangerine encouraging you to make the decisions. Such as what the two of you will be doing after dinner, to which you shyly shrugged your shoulders. Anything sounded good, just as long as you were with Tangerine. 

After some more sitting in his lap and kisses to your face, Tangerine places you in your empty seat and starts to clean up. But not before asking you to finish your apple juice and little bowl of fruit. 

He can’t help but smile at you from across the kitchen when you’re happily sitting in your seat, swinging your legs, and popping grapes into your mouth. He just wants to throw you on the bed and have his way with you again, flipping your dress up and having his own taste of you until you’re begging him to stop. 

Next time, he thinks. 

[waytooinvested]

Forgotten, Not Forgiven - Chapter 30

This and previous chapters are also on AO3

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

‘Here, taste this, tell me what it needs.’

Kara accepted the offered spoon and blew on it before taking the sauce onto her tongue with the considering look of a connoisseur.

���Hmm… a tiny bit more oregano I think. And a couple of squares of that super intense dark chocolate you think I haven’t discovered yet.’

Lena chuckled, going to fetch the ingredients Kara had suggested.

‘That’ll teach me to think I can hide chocolate from you. I only bought it yesterday, you’re like a blood hound.’

‘What can I say, I take a healthy interest in my snack options. Your chocolate is pretty safe though – I maintain that candy really shouldn’t be bitter. Well, except when you’re adding it to a savoury recipe, then that 90% cocoa stuff is perfect.’

‘I’ll take your word for it.’

Lena knew that the idea of adding cocoa to savoury dishes was hardly a new one, but it still felt instinctively wrong to be dropping squares of chocolate into her marinara, the smell of it as it melted mingling with the tomato and herbs in a blend that was frankly confusing to her senses. It was not a choice she would have made on her own, but she had come to trust Kara’s instincts when it came to flavour.

After a few days of take out and easy freezer-to-oven dinners, Lena had insisted on cooking proper meals (because pot stickers and pizza alone were not nutritionally balanced enough to aid a speedy recovery, even if they did technically contain vegetables), and over time cooking together had become a welcome part of their evening routine. To begin with Kara just sat nearby while Lena cooked, reading aloud to her from whatever book Lena had on the go at the time, or else exchanging stories about what they had each been up to during the day; but as her pain diminished and she started to regain more use of her wrist, Kara had begun to take an interest in the cooking process itself.

After the pancake disaster Lena had (not unreasonably, she thought) felt some trepidation the first time Kara had offered to help make dinner, but they quickly discovered that, as long as Lena took over all charge of the process, they actually made an amazing team. Lena had always enjoyed cooking for herself when she could find the time (she found great satisfaction in taking unrelated parts and bringing them together to make something new and better, whether it was an image inducer or a mushroom and stilton tarte tatin), but it was Kara that was the real surprise. She made short work of anything that needed chopping, grating or mashing and acted as an enthusiastic sous chef for any dish Lena suggested they try, but she really came into her own when it came to flavour combinations, and was inevitably the one to suggest the exact missing ingredient to elevate whatever dish they were making from mere ordinary week night filler to something that could be served with pride at any dinner party.

As usual, once the chocolate was fully stirred in and the sauce had had a few more minutes to combine, Lena found that Kara’s recommendation had been spot on. Her additions added a depth and richness that had been missing before, and nicely balanced out the acidity of the tomatoes to create something that tasted truly phenomenal.

‘Okay, that’s amazing. How did you know that would work?’

Kara grinned and shrugged, half smug, half bashfully pleased with the compliment.

‘I guess there have to be some advantages to basically being a walking stomach. I’ve tried a lot of different flavours, and I pay attention to what makes things go well together.’

‘Well, I’m impressed. I grew up in a house with a professional chef on staff, and some of your dishes could rival his.’

‘Not without you they couldn’t. I get too distracted when I’m cooking, and either eat half the ingredients as I go or else mess up my timings and end up with a burned crust at the bottom of the pan.’

‘We’re the dream team.’

‘Yup!’

Lena couldn’t help thinking how many other things that applied to in their new shared experience beyond simple meal prep. Now they had settled in and Kara was able to do more for herself, living together was becoming comfortable in a way she had never imagined cohabiting with another person could be. Even with Jack, who she really had loved, sharing their space had felt like an ongoing negotiation to maintain a balance between her comfort and his, both of them having constantly to give ground in order to maintain domestic harmony.

It wasn’t like that with Kara. There was compromise of course, but it never felt like a fight. It felt more as though the two of them were a team, working together to solve whatever the problem was rather than just trying to get their own way. Like when Kara had started feeling homesick for her own apartment around about the two week mark, and they talked it through and then Lena brought over a whole load of her things to make the penthouse feel more like home. It could have been a disaster of clashing taste and excess clutter, but it wasn’t. They had spent a happy afternoon decorating together, Kara sitting on the couch with her injured leg propped up while Lena followed her suggestions for where to put things: a painting Kara had done here, some bright throw pillows there, a couple of cosy woven blankets draped over the back of the sofa where they could be grabbed and snuggled under while watching a movie.

What they ended up with was a blend of both their styles that shouldn’t have worked, but somehow did. Lena had always thought that she preferred her spaces to be clear and modern, as far removed from the dark, old money clutter of the Luthor Mansion as she could get, but she found now that she liked this so much better. It was cosy and friendly, and it reminded her of how safe and happy she had always felt in Kara’s apartment. Having her things here side by side with Lena’s own felt right, like this was their home, not just hers.

She didn’t like to dwell on just how much she loved that feeling, because if she did she would be forced to remember how fleeting it was. Kara was getting stronger every day, and was already well enough to have started working from home, though she was yet to return to the office. And her recovery was a good thing, of course. A wonderful thing. But Lena couldn’t help the sinking feeling in her stomach when she remembered how soon the time would come when all this would be over, and she would have to go back to living alone in a place that would feel too big, too sterile, too unnaturally quiet without Kara and all her things to breath life and warmth into it.

And of course when Kara moved back to her own apartment Lena would have no more excuses to put off fulfilling her unspoken promise to track down Lex, and however that played out, it was bound to change things. Even with her best case scenario, where she successfully killed Lex before he could kill her and made it out with the cure, restoring Kara’s memories would bring an end to this cosy domestic bubble they had made for themselves. And if somehow they managed to work through all of their history and found they still loved each other on the other side of that, Kara would go back to juggling her work at Catco with saving the city while Lena returned to being a proper full time CEO. They would both have much less time for just hanging out together, learning to make their own pot stickers and practising Singstar duets, especially when they no longer lived under the same roof.

But, she reminded herself, they weren’t there yet.

Kara might be well enough to write articles from her nest on the couch and hobble to and from the bathroom with the assistance of crutches now, but her leg was going to be in plaster for a few more weeks, and she wasn’t done recovering yet.

She still needed Lena.

They still had time.

‘Are you okay love? You look a million miles away.’

Lena turned to meet Kara’s gently concerned look with a smile, letting her spiralling thoughts fade into the background to be replaced by the much more tangible presence of their evening plans.

‘I’m good. Just pondering what movie we should watch after we eat. I think I’m in the mood for something cheerful tonight.’

‘How about Singin’ in the rain?’

‘Again?’

‘Well, how could you not feel cheerful listening to those songs? But I’m open to other options. Actually I was looking for movie night ideas online yesterday and thought it might be nice to watch Imagine Me & You some time… would you be up for giving it a try? I think it’s mostly cheerful. There’s a happy ending for definite.’

Lena had never heard of ‘Imagine Me & You’, but mostly cheerful with a happy ending and something other than the musical they had watched four times since Kara moved in was okay with her.

‘Sure, sounds great.’

They ate their (excellent) meal and then Kara loaded the dishwasher while Lena brought the crockery over to her and wiped down the surfaces. They could have left it for the cleaners to take care of in the morning, but the shared chore felt easy, natural, a routine they had performed over and over and could gladly perform a thousand times more, if given the chance.

When the kitchen was back to rights they grabbed a bottle of wine and a tub of Ben and Jerry’s Chunky Monkey, and settled down on the couch. They were long past the point of sitting cautiously apart on the more-than-big-enough-not-to-touch sofa, and Kara’s shoulder was pressed up against Lena’s before she had even managed to work the lid free from the ice cream.

‘How many tubs do we still have left?’

‘About eight.’

‘And we’ve eaten…?’

‘… about eight.’

Kara laughed, bopping her head gently against Lena’s as she dug her spoon into the banana-nut-fudge that was tonight’s flavour of choice.

‘I can’t believe you bought sixteen flavours of ice cream just to cheer me up.’

‘Well, you were sad and in pain and I wanted to make you feel better – I’d have bought more, except I also needed room for all the frozen potstickers and oven-ready pastries.’

‘Ohhh those were so good. I felt like I’d just walked into a Parisian bakery on our croissant mornings.’

‘Now we’ve got into the swing of cooking we should try making some from scratch. I bet you could come up with some really interesting breakfast pastry flavour combinations’ Lena suggested.

‘Yes, lets do that on Saturday! First flavour possibility, banana, walnut and fudge. What do you think?’

Kara held out the ice cream tub to Lena, and she dug her spoon in to sample.

‘Hm… banana – not my usual go to, but I could be convinced as long as we used real ones, and could be paired with a custard base. Walnuts would add a nice crunch and flavour. Fudge… pretty good in the ice cream, but I’m not sure about the pastry.’

‘You’re right, semi-sweet chocolate would probably be better for balance. I like the ice cream though, solid six out of ten. Remind me what it’s up against?’

‘New York Super Fudge Chunk.’

Kara winced and patted the tub in her hand sympathetically.

‘Oof. Poor thing never stood a chance.’

‘Agreed. I’ll update the spreadsheet.’

Given the sheer quantity of ice cream flavours they had had to choose from and the need to find novel ways to fill their time during the first couple of weeks, Kara had started what she called the “ice cream play offs” in a bid to find the ultimate ice cream flavour. And Lena, being ever the scientist, had been unable to resist the temptation to record their results properly, which had led to the creation of their unofficial official Ben and Jerry’s world rankings spreadsheet, which they updated meticulously each time they picked a new pint to sample. It brought together Kara’s enthusiasm for food and Lena’s inherent nerdiness in a glorious shared investment in their unserious contest, and cumulatively they had spent at least a couple of hours arguing companionably over whether Cherry Garcia or Chocolate fudge brownie should make it to the next round, or if Netflix and Chill’d should gain or lose points for being called that.

Now the serious matter of ice cream ranking had been decided they at last pressed play on the movie and settled down to enjoy the story, each occasionally dipping their spoon for another bite as they watched.

It started with a bride getting ready for her wedding day, and Lena mentally prepared herself for a couple of hours of cheesy rom com.

There was a moment pretty early on where Rachel (the bride) made eye contact with the florist as she walked down the aisle that made Lena raise an eyebrow, but it wasn’t until the way they looked at each other during the first visit to Luce’s shop that she was certain beyond doubt of what sort of movie Kara had picked for them to watch.

Oh.

Lena had imagined watching a queer love story together many times before – had even considered suggesting one in their previous life, as another hint to the intentions that Kara never seemed to pick up on, but she had never actually done it. Now Kara was the one making the move, and fuck, it was as if she was taking a sledgehammer to the foundations of Lena’s good intentions to maintain this last bit of distance between them.

They took another blow when, during a tension-loaded scene in a darkened classroom while Rachel fantasised about reaching out to touch Luce, Kara pulled her legs up to stretch out on the couch, moving her head from Lena’s shoulder to lie in her lap with a contented, kittenish sigh.

She did her best to keep her hands to herself, but by the time Luce was wrapping her arms around Rachel to teach her how to project at a soccer game she found she was, without quite knowing how it happened, idly playing with Kara’s hair. As soon as she realised what she was doing she froze, and made to move her arm back to the safe distance of the back of the couch, but Kara made a little grumbling noise of protest.

‘Don’t stop. I love having my hair played with, it makes me feel all floppy and relaxed, like a cat being petted.’

So Lena went back to running her fingers through the soft golden waves, her nails scratching lightly over Kara’s scalp in a way that made her give a little shiver of pleasure.

‘Mmm, it’s so nice, I could fall asleep.’

‘You probably shouldn’t, you’ll have a terrible crick in your neck if you sleep like this... Maybe we should call it a night and go to bed?’

‘Noo, I want to see the end of the movie. And I don’t want to stop hanging out yet. I don’t mind a cricked neck.’

Lena knew she absolutely shouldn’t say what she was about to say, but Luce was telling Rachel that the lily means ‘I dare you to love me’, and Kara was soft and relaxed against her knees, and right at that moment she couldn’t bring herself to care about anything else.

‘I have a TV in my room. We could finish watching in there if you like, then it wouldn’t matter if you fall asleep before the end.’

Kara looked up at her, and her expression said she was aware of how much more could be read into that offer than mere practicality, but she didn’t say so. She smiled and nodded against Lena’s thigh.

‘Mmkay. I’ll change and brush my teeth now then, just in case.’

‘Good idea. Just in case.’

Lena changed too, opting without quite knowing why to put on the marshmallow pajamas she had just ‘happened’ to pick up from Kara’s apartment when she’d gone round to collect her things. They weren’t hers to put on, technically, but she didn’t think Kara would mind, and though she still didn’t feel much like her usual put together self in them, she felt like Kara’s Lena, and that was all she wanted to be right now.

Kara gave her the softest smile when she saw what Lena was wearing.

‘Aw, my marshmallow Lena is back. You look so cute in those, I think I’m going to have to officially give them to you.’

‘Don’t. I like that they’re yours.’

Lena felt herself blushing at the confession, and looked away quickly before it could turn into anything more.

‘Lets finish watching the movie before we really do get too sleepy.’

Once Kara was settled in beside her Lena pressed play, but she couldn’t focus on what was happening on the screen. All she was aware of was Kara in the bed beside her, no longer actually touching her but somehow feeling even more intimately near than when her head had been resting in Lena’s lap on the couch.

This was a terrible idea. It was a terrible idea...

She slid further down against the mound of pillows at her back, and, hidden beneath the covers where she couldn’t see and could therefore pretend it didn’t count, she laced her fingers through Kara’s.

Kara squeezed her hand in return, and the movie played on.

They did not let go.

[ordinaryschmuck]

Full Family AU Part 16

"I'm not going to bed yet, am I...?" Luz asked, fully dressed in her jammies after taking a bath.

"You are soon," Camila said. "We're just getting you and Vee ready for now."

"Okay...Vee's fun, by the way," Luz said with a smile. "I taught her a lot of things. How to walk, draw, and...re...call...itate?"

Camila snorted, trying her best to hold back her laughter. "Do you mean "re-calibrate?"

"That's the word!" Luz exclaimed. "Papi likes to use too big of words."

"He sure does."

"But, yeah, I taught her that thing Papi taught me! Watch!"

Luz then started shaking herself all over, only stopping once she got dizzy. Camila had to stop her from falling on her butt.

"I wish he taught you something a little less...chaotic."

Luz giggled, her eyes still spinning. "Yeah..."

"This one's bath is done," Manny announced. He entered the room with Vee, still wearing her sundress. "This dress of hers really is like skin. Just washed her in the tub and the pizza sauce just went off her. Look: It doesn't even leave a stain."

"I'm sorry," Vee muttered.

"What are you sorry about?" Manny asked with a chuckle. "Not everything you do is bad. This is actually a great thing. Save us money for laundry."

"Assuming she can change shape into wearing different clothes," Camila pointed out. "Is that something you can do, sweetie?"

Vee played with her thumbs. "Shapeshifting requires magic. I only have a little left..."

Luz gasped. "Magic?!"

"Oh, right. Uh, forget that, Mija," Manny told Luz.

"Forget it?! She said magic! Magic's real?!"

Vee nodded, getting Luz to squee!

"Luz, not now," Camila said. "What do you think you're capable of doing?"

"...Maybe changing what I wear one more time?" Vee suggested. Camila hummed for a second, stroking her chin as she tried to think of something. Wordlessly, she went to Luz's closet, opened it up and do a bit of digging. While she was distracted, Luz ran up to Vee with her smile brighter and wider than ever before.

"What kind of magic is real?" She asked. "Is it something everyone can do? Can I do it? Is it something that comes from the heart? You also said something about storing it? What does that mean? Can you do magic? Ooh, is shapeshifting part of your magic?!"

"Luz." Both Luz's parents gently chastised the young girl, making her stop with the constant questions. And for good reason, because it was starting to make Vee hide behind Manny's leg due to all the attention on her.

"Sorry," Luz muttered, looking down in shame.

"It's okay, querrida," Manny said, "But you need to turn your excitement down a couple notches. Just for tonight."

"Okay, Papi..."

"Ah-ha!" Camila returned from the closet, holding up one of Luz's swimsuits, a pink sparkly one-piece with a star in the center. "Can you shapeshift into wearing something like this, Vee? Not the exact color or design, just...the suit."

"I...can try..." Vee closed her eyes and concentrated, the dress shrinking and changing into a one-piece, just like Luz's. But as the dress changed, so did other parts of Vee. Her ears, which were circle, started looking more like Vee's basilisk ears, which blended in with the rest of her hair. Vee's mouth started to become more curved like a cat's instead of the thin line it was before. And when she opened her eyes, her pupils were yellow and blue, just like in her basilisk form. "Did I do good...?"

Camila and Manny stared at her, not sure to respond.

"You...did good enough," Camila chose to see. "But..."

"Her face is different," Luz broke the news first.

"Yeah..."

"Oh..." Vee played with her thumbs some more. "I'm--"

"Don't say it," Manny interrupted. "It's fine. We can just...tell people you were born this way if they ask. I mean, it's not too weird, right? For someone to look this way."

"I guess not?" Camila said, unsure herself.

"But isn't that lying?" Luz asked.

"Lying is only good when it's for the people you love," Manny told her.

"Might want to revitalize that one," Camila said as she went to the closet. "Until then, we can't have Vee sleep in a swim suit. So..."

She pulled out another pair of Luz's jammies.

"Luz and Vee seem about the same size, right?" Camila asked.

"Only one way to find out," Manny agreed.

[transactinides]

i'm super bad at cooking and never know where to start because every recipe out there asks for ingredients i simply don't have at home so do you perhaps know what basic ones would be good to stock up on? like eggs and stuff...especially when it comes to spices i have no idea what is okay to use

Haii o/ very honored that you sent me an ask, and ofc I’ll do my best to help! This reply got a bit out of hand so. Long text under the cut. Behold. Feel free to reach out in asks or dms or whatever with any future questions (@ everyone tbh).

Food is, of course, very subjective, so my idea of a perfect list of foods to keep a stock of will not be universal, but I hope this will, at least, give you some ideas if anything. 

First of all, I usually mentally break down my typical weekday recipe into vaguely carbs source - protein source - veggies, buy a couple of options for each category and just switch them around for variety. My standard set is

rice / pasta (usually spaghetti re:shapes) / glass noodles

eggs / chicken / tofu / bacon

random pack of frozen vegetables, bell peppers, eggplants, tomatoes, cucumbers, leafy greens. garlic and onions too

I have an option of making egg fried rice with chopped up bacon and added frozen vegetables one day, then blending the leftover vegetables with bell peppers and tomatoes to use as pasta sauce with chicken and spaghetti the next day, then branching out and making eggplant tofu stir fry with glass noodles, then using whatever eggplant tofu stir fry i had left as rice balls filling and making myself a quick vegetable salad on the side… And all those things are easy to make and don’t need much fussing around. 

Other options to consider would be potatoes (you can roast them with whatever, boil, fry, etc), buckwheat (my wife doesn’t like it otherwise I’d use it more often), kidney beans and chickpeas for your carbs*; fish and meat for your proteins (those are. a bit too expensive for me usually); carrots, cabbage, leeks etc. 

The list looks long, but, again, you just need to pick out a couple of things from each group and throw shit in a pan so to speak. And a lot of them are easily soup-able (boiling water chicken potatoes carrots rice? boom soup. etc), which is another easy base recipe to exploit.

Now to the matter of spices. Salt and pepper are obvious enough, but a good thing to look for are, especially if you are just getting into cooking, spice blends. Something something French Herbs™ something something Taco Seasoning™ something something Seven Spice™ something something Garam Masala™. There’s a lot of different ones, but they are, essentially, a formed flavor profile in themselves, so you don’t need to worry about mixing spices and herbs that might not go well together, and by paying attention to contents you can learn for yourself what individual seasonings are commonly used together.

Also, everyone, hold your judgement real quick and trust me with this, but ooh I always save leftover flavor packets from instant ramen and reuse them in other dishes. Egg fried rice just doesn’t taste right without suspicious red powder courtesy of shin ramen… It’s probably MSG my beloved or something…

While I’m at it, bouillon cubes are handy to have, you can use them for soups, crumble them up in other recipes. Adding one to the water you’re cooking rice in is a great hack at making it more flavourful.

In general, while I do actually have way too much spices (and keep buying more… very excited about my newly acquired dried tarragon…), the ones I’d advise to have for an average person would be:

Salt (ideally both coarse grain and fine grain, but fine grain only serves you just right)

black pepper (both in a mill/grinder and peppercorns), red pepper flakes

paprika, garlic powder, ginger powder

bay leaves, dried oregano, basil, thyme, dill, cinnamon, coriander, cardamon, cumin, turmeric, sumak....

I really got a bit carried away by the end, but. You don't actually need to buy all of them and at the same time, just start with whatever couple of things you'd need for whatever you are cooking and let your collection build up over time, since spices aren't something you need to buy often anyway 👍

Other things I think it’s nice to have in stock in your kitchen would be flour and baking powder, vinegar (distilled vinegar, rice vinegar… I like to have balsamic vinegar too but it’s so expensive it’s ridiculous ngl), soy sauce, cooking oil of your choice (I use sunflower oil, olive oil and sesame oil), panko or breadcrumbs, starch (i have potato starch, cornstarch and tapioka starch, I would suggest just getting cornstarch at first).

* going to clarify here that while beans are often brought up as a source of protein, most are rich in complex carbs, excluding edamame and green beans for example. And since I mostly often cook beans with meat, they check out my daily carbs in my head.

[ausefulblogforputtingthingsin]

Hello! Would you be willing to elaborate on what you eat almost every day? I'm hunting for food that will keep me not-malnourished and chicken tilapia asparagus yogurt squash and I know I'm missing something- is this a set meal you make every day or do you rotate between things?

I am entranced.

Sure! I basically rotate through combinations of those foods every day, with various other little additions. It's cheap, simple, and tasty, and because it's got a lot of protein and fiber, it's satisfying and filling. Also, everything is pretty much a one dish dinner, to minimize dishes, though you might need something to store leftovers. Depending on what's on sale and how much time/spoons I have, sometimes the veggies are fresh, and sometimes they're frozen.

The chicken and tilapia are frozen, and I also started getting frozen salmon too. The tilapia is probably the cheapest of the proteins but the chicken is the most convenient since it's already cooked:

They're from Walmart but sometimes the chicken is on sale for way cheaper at Fry's (Kroger).

For the chicken I throw it in a big bowl with whatever frozen veggies (usually broccoli but sometimes onions and bell peppers, brussel sprouts, squash, or whatever caught my eye at Trader Joe's). You can use any frozen veggies. I microwave it for like 4 minutes, add a sauce or salsa (it can be anything, but I usually go with pasta sauce, salsa, or masala sauce), then mix it and microwave it another couple minutes until it's evenly heated. Sometimes I sprinkle cheese on top or add like 1/3 of a can of black beans for the last minute of microwaving. That's what I often eat on weeknights when I'm tired. It's nice because it takes no planning and there's enough variety that it's not boring.

For the fish, I usually roast it with asparagus. It takes a bit more time but it's super easy. I only buy asparagus on sale (though I do get it frozen for the meals I talked about earlier), and as soon as I get it home I break off the bottom of the stems and put it in mugs of water in fridge. It'll last at least a week like that before you cook it. This can also be done with brussel sprouts, fresh broccoli, cauliflower, squash, or any other veggie, and you can make just one piece of fish for one dinner, or cook several at once if you want leftovers.

I toss the veggies in some olive oil (or use an olive oil spray) and some garlic powder or a steak seasoning blend, then put them in a Pyrex roasting pan. I roast them for like 20 minutes while I thaw the fish (I use the weight defrost on my microwave). Different veggies need different times, and I just look that up on the internet. I season the fish with olive oil and some salt, and sometimes spices, and then I put it in the same pyrex with the veggies and put it all back in the oven to finish cooking. I just use the cooking time on the package of fish. For the salmon, I scoot the veggies over and put it skin side down on the pyrex, and for the tilapia, i put it on top of the veggies so it doesn't stick and get shredded when I try to move it. Basically I find out how long the fish needs to cook, and I start the veggies and cook them enough that they can finish cooking in the time it takes the fish to cook. When I add the fish I'll often sprinkle the asparagus with parmesan if I have some - it's so good! If you use a smallish baking dish, like a 9 inch brownie one, you can even eat your dinner right from that and not make extra dishes.

For Squash, I'll slice up some yellow and/or gray squash, or even zucchini, and sautee it, and I'll add black beans and some cheese for protein, and then add salsa. It's good for breakfast, lunch, or dinner, and I often make a whole bunch so I can have leftovers to take for lunch. That's really good with eggs too.

Canned tuna is always good, and I mix in some avocado and eat it in a sandwich or with celery sticks. It's great with nori flakes too

For yogurt, I usually just thaw some frozen berries or get berries when they're on sale, and just put them in a bowl with some yogurt. Sometimes I'll also throw in a handful of trail mix or some of the chocolate covers espresso beans from Trader Joes lol. I prefer plain Greek yogurt, because you can do more with it. Every now and then, I'll mix some yogurt with lemon juice or with masala sauce to make a dressing or to add some creaminess to a sauce I'm putting on ckicken or fish.

I probably made it sound more complicated than it is, but yeah I mix and match all the foods I mentioned, and some are fresh and some are frozen.

[hot-take-tournament]

it's finally time to close the book on this

HOT TAKE TOURNAMENT:

SHOWDOWN AT HIGH NOON (#15)

Submissions 8, 24, 28, 33, 88, 98, 213, 261, 272, 280

IS PINEAPPLE ON PIZZA GOOD?

[ALL PROPAGANDA UNDER THE CUT]

Then we never have to talk about this again.

Pre-preliminaries will be used to determine what qualifies as a hot take. Propaganda is encouraged!

Also, remember to reblog your favourite polls for exposure! (exposure like when your exposed to deadly radiation)

YES:

(24)

Pinapple [sic] belongs on pizza.

There are many dishes that mix sweet and savory. Cheese and fruit as found on charcuterie boards is a prime example. What else mixes fruit and cheese? That’s right. Pineapple pizza. The salty savoriness of the cheese blends perfectly with the cooked pineapple, which is less tart than raw fruit. Add bacon, canadian bacon, or chicken for extra deliciousness. You either like pineapple on pizza or you’re a coward.

(28)

Pineapple on pizza is not only good, it’s the best pizza topping there is

Sweet and savory is a godly flavor combo. It hits all the notes at once. It provides the acid and the sweetness to an otherwise very heavy dish

(33)

Adding to the last one I sent [about milk before cereal], "pineapple does not belong on pizza" people are also annoying as fuck

I don't even like pineapple but it's the only pizza my best friend will tolerate and I'm tired of people calling her a freak for it

(98)

Pineapple on pizza is fine.

I work in a pizza place & have to see absolutely fucking horrific monstrosities that people call pizza. Here’s a list of things worse than pineapple that I’ve seen on pizza: any topping that people ask for “extra extra” of (like mushrooms or spinach), fish, nacho cheese sauce, & a mix of beans and salsa

(213)

Pineapple on pizza is fine.

It's not mana from heaven or anything but it's not bad either. The flavors balance out pretty well.

(261)

PINEAPPLE ON PIZZA IS AMAZING!!!

it tastes good and pepperoni fans are just mean to us pineapple on pizza likers.

YES, but –

(272)

i like pineapple on pizza. the ham is the problem

listen i can do meat on pizza. but ham AND pineapple? no. something about that feels unholy. so i pick off the ham so i can enjoy my pineapple pizza. also i am allergic to pineapple. but we persevere

(280)

pineapple pizza is good in america

the sweet and savory combination is just… ough. but most native italian people don’t like the idea of pineapple pizza. why? the answer comes in the difference in tomatoes in italy and the united states. in america, tomatoes are very sour and savory, so pineapple can really do a pizza some favors. however, italian tomatoes, while still savory and tart, are very sweet. putting pineapple on an italian pizza would just be redundant.

(8)

I think people need to stop being so angry about Pineapple on Pizza. Weather [sic] you like it or not isn't a big deal

If we're supposed to 'respect other's opinions' then why do pizza toppings need to start a war? It's really pointless.

(oh... um... sorry dude. guess i'm not helping, am i)

NO:

(88)

pineapple on pizza should be outlawed

disgusting. crime against perfectly good pizza.

i’m RIGHT., i will FIGHT YOU, 🍍+🍕= 🚮

(266)

Pineapple should not be on pizza.

Fruit allergiers, particularly pineapple allergies, are steadily on the rise and this topping will legit kill someone if there's not at least some proper storage.

I work in a pizza place, and have been working with pizza for years. There is NO proper storage for pineapple at most pizza places. It comes from a can and the juice gets on every surface. Same with 90% of other toppings.

If you have a friend who is allergic to pineapple, do not recommend pizza for dinner during hang outs. Opt for anything else.

Pineapple should not be on pizza. The hell fruit should stay out of pizza kitchens.

[lumine-no-hikari]

Dear Sephiroth: (a letter to a fictional character, because why not) #157

I made a discovery today.

So like… I've been using this neck traction device thingy at home, like the folks at the PT place said. You stick your head in the contraption, stick the strap around your head, and pump the device full of air, and it's like pulling your own head off, but softcore. I'm supposed to do that like once a day or whatever.

And then I made a tea. I ordered a blend that I concocted specifically with you in mind, and it came with some other sample teas. I tried the strawberry one. And it looked really neat while it was brewing, with the swirling colors in the water:

It resolved into a beautiful ruby red:

...And then I put honey and milk in it:

...I think I might have used a bit too much honey; I wasn't crazy about this one. But it certainly looked very pretty!

So then, I went to PT today. And they mashed up all the muscles around my right scapula, which really super sucked, because not only did it hurt like fuck because the muscles are BEYOND pissed, but also it made my ring finger and pinky finger all weird and tingly, and the pain referred all the way up into the right side of my face and skull, and. Even after PT was over, the fingers continued to tingle for a while, and the right side of my face felt… weird…? weak…? almost kinda tingly and burn-ey…? I dunno, but kinda like that for… a while afterwards.

M and I went out for lunch after that. I got some really tasty-looking things. And I took pictures!! Here...

This is challah bread with burrata and cherries and basil and fresh olive oil with salt and pepper! It was SO GOOD!!!

...I'm not really sure why, but I get the feeling that you might really like burrata. Have you tried one before? What did you think?

I also got shrimp scampi:

It's maybe a tiny bit like pasta pescatore? But it's a different sauce and it's only got shrimp. But maybe you'd still like it...

Finally, this week's crème brûlée flavor was pineapple-coconut! It was SUPER TASTY!

...Have you ever had crème brûlée? I wonder what you think about it...

Anyway, somewhere in there, I moved my neck and something went CRONCH. And just like that, the weird feeling in my face and the tingly feeling in my fingers pretty much vanished. I thought I was going to need to rest today, but as it turned out, my body was totally chill after that, which was pretty snazzy!

So I went home briefly and did something that I had been meaning to do for a while now - just an item in my wacky inventory of autistic nerd things that I had been meaning to spruce up and set to rights. And I was mostly successful (but I gotta finish the job tomorrow).

But I still felt pretty good, and it was breezy today, so when J went out to run an errand, I went with him and brought the kites, and I flew the eagle kite this time! Oh, and!!! I didn't even tell you the best part!!! There was a soccer game at this park, and unexpectedly, there was FRESH LEMONADE!!!!

...Sephiroth, have you ever had fresh lemonade!!!!!!! ...That was supposed to be a question, but in my head I yelled it so excitedly that all the question marks got alarmed, stood up straight, and became exclamation points instead!!!! But don't worry about that right now; I have additional pictures!!! Look!!!

Fresh lemonade is one of my favorite things!!!! And fresh limeade is also one of my favorite things!!!! And I couldn't decide between them, SO I GOT BOTH OF THEM AND IT WAS VERY GOOD, AND....!!!! I shared them with J, but... I wished I could share them with you, too...

...

We got pizza afterwards:

...I still wonder what toppings you like best on your pizza. I really like mushrooms, but I'll eat most anything that normally goes on pizza, unless it's pineapple or olives. Both of those things are very fine items to put on pizza, but they are, sadly, not appealing to my particular sensory hardware.

And then, sometime along the way home, I moved my head again and something else went SUPERMEGACRONCH, and… suddenly I was in A LOT LESS PAIN, HOLY COW!!! And I felt taller, somehow; it was uncanny and kind of disorienting. So then we went home, and I still felt tall (and my head feels kinda weird, too, but in a good way…??), so I broke out the tape measure, and…

…Sure enough, the reading on it is now 5'9" (or about 175.25cm) instead of 5'8" (or about 172.75cm). And that is my discovery. I am taller than what I initially thought. And that's kind of scary, because I'm already like 4 inches taller than most people in female bodies. I've been made fun of in my past for my height, been told that I'm intimidating, been told that I stick out... I've even had a couple angry men tell me that my height is "emasculating". I really didn't want this discovery. But here we are, and I suppose there's not much that can be done about it. Oh well.

And so now I have to wonder… just how long has my neck been messed up? Because I've been 5'8" since I was like 12. And at least for now, my neck feels a lot less hunched over than before. So I guess this points to the notion that the mermaid training might have simply exacerbated an existing injury instead of creating a new one, which is interesting as a concept.

…I wonder what else might click back into place over the coming days… Hm…

Well anyway. Guess I had better send along the other pictures of today's adventures, right? So here:

...And that's all I have for you today, because we didn't get home until pretty late, and now that I'm done with today's letter, it's almost time for bed, and I gotta make sure I'm rested because tomorrow, two dear friends of mine are getting married, and so M, J, and I have all been invited to go! Thankfully, we don't have to dress up, but I do wanna make sure I'm prepared to withstand all the social; crowds aren't easy for me to deal with by any stretch of the imagination, what with all the noise and the movement, and all that potential for rejection, goodness me.

Hey, Sephiroth? Sometime if you're ever in my neighborhood, do you wanna maybe fly a kite and drink lemonade and go get pizza? I'll bet you'd be really good at flying a kite, especially since you could just take the kite and zoom right up in the air with that fancy wing of yours, and then stick it in a spot with a nice breeze; the breeze always gets better the further up in the air one goes. But I imagine you probably knew that already, right?

...Impossible, I know, haha. But I can daydream sometimes; it's not illegal yet.

I love you. I'll write again tomorrow, okay? So please stay safe and take good care of yourself out there.

Your friend, Lumine

[swiftscion]

✢⁎. larcei in garreg mach

source !

PERSONAL INFORMATION

GENDER. Female

AGE. 20

HEIGHT. 160 cm / 5'3

BIRTHDATE. December 28th, Gran 759 

CREST/HOLY BLOOD. Minor Od (though subject to change depending on her father)

CLASS. Blue Lions student

AFFILIATION. Kingdom of Isaach

BIOGRAPHY. Daughter of the legendary swordmaster Ayra. Arrived at the Officers Academy in search of her mother, whom she believes is still alive. Her skills with her blade are matched only by her red-hot temper, and her devoted spirit is both her biggest strength and greatest weakness. While technically royalty, her simple and blunt mannerisms are fitting of one raised alongside other orphans. She wishes to become the strongest version of herself that she can, echoing her mother's legacy so they can one day reunite.

PERSONAL HISTORY

Grann Year 759 ~ Born during the Holy Wars alongside her twin brother, Scathach

Grann Year 761 ~ Separated from her parents following the Battle of Belhalla, and placed in Tirnanog to be raised as an orphan

Grann Year 777 ~ Lends her sword to the Liberation Army and helps restore Isaach after its occupation

Imperial Year 1180 ~ Enrolls at the Officer's Academy at Garreg Mach

INTERESTS. Swordplay, Competition, Traveling LIKES. Light clothing, physical activity, festivals, stars, sweets DISLIKES. Injustice, feeling like a child, dishonorable combat, flowery language, laziness STATUS. Princess of Isaach, cousin of King Shannan of Isaach CLOSE ALLIES: Scathach, Lucina, Edward

DINING HALL PREFERENCES

LIKES. country style red turnip plate, saghert and cream, sweet bun trio, peach sorbet, pheasant roast with berry sauce, garreg mach meat pie, deirdriu-styled fried pheasant, sauteed jerky, sauteed pheasant and eggs, beast meat teppanyaki, gronder meat skewers, pickled rabbit skewers

DISLIKES. sweet and salty whitefish, small fish skewers, grilled herring, fish and bean soup, fruit and herring tart, fisherman’s bounty, fish sandwich, two-fish saute, cabbage and herring stew, bourgeois pike, super spicy-fish dango, spicy fish and turnip stew, pickled seafood and vegetables, scrambled eggs with vegetables, fried crayfish, daphnel stew, cheesy verona stew, gautier cheese gratin, vegetable pasta salad, onion gratin soup, vegetable stir-fry

DINING HALL NOTES

FAVORITE DISH.  ✧

"As a kid, I would've hit my brother over the head for somethin' like this!"

STANDARD DISH.  ✧

"You loaded up our plates with extras, yeah? Eating is just as important as training."

LEAST FAVORITE DISH.  ✧

"Are you sick in the head?! A-Actually, I think I'm about to be...!"

WITH SCATHACH.  ✧

"Remember when Edain used to make all our meals for us? I bet I can still eat these ones faster than you!"

WITH AYRA.  ✧

"This might sound silly, but... I've always wanted to do this with you... Mother...."

TEA TIME GUIDE

FAVORITE TEA. Honeyed-Fruit Blend, Tea of the Saints

CONVERSATION TOPICS. evaluating allies. reliable allies. tell me about yourself. working hours for guards. exploring the monastery. cats. past laughs. school uniforms. heroes’ relics. children at the market. hopes for the future. thanks for everything. shareable snacks. getting out of homework. creative pranks. making friends. close calls. a place you'd like to visit. sturdy weapons. potential training partners. the last battle. your ambitions. overcoming weaknesses. mighty weapons. i'm counting on you. someone you look up to. a new sword technique. equipment upkeep. the thrill of sweets. you seem different. favorite sweets. a new gambit.

TEA TIME QUOTES

GREETING.  ✧

(1) "I prefer staying on the move, but I'll make time for you."

(2) “Thanks for reminding me that I need to take a load off every now and then.”

(3) “I won't forget this, you know. Next time, it'll be my treat!”

FAVORITE TEA.  ✧

“Huh? Hey--Who told you I like this stuff?!”

FIVE STAR TEA.  ✧

“Woah... Isn't this a bit much? Hmph, if you're trying to impress me, save it. Last thing I need is another flower shoved in my face!”

BEING OBSERVED.  ✧

(1) "Don't tell me you brought me here just to gawk at me! I'll pull you into a stump if you don't buzz off!" (2) “Bored already? Me too. Let's get in a round of fighting after we're done.” (3) “Geez... I don't think I could ever get used to this kind of attention...”

QUIPS.  ✧

"Ah--That's hot!" "Just gotta stop drinking so fast...!" "Eheheh..." "Not bad!" "How are things with you?" "Reminds me of her..." "Yeah?" "It'll go straight to my legs." "What's up?" "I wonder what goes good with this..." "Hey!" "Hmm..."

ENDING.  ✧

"Heh, looks like I finished before you. Blink, and you'll miss me!"

FINAL COMMENTS.  ✧

(1) What did you think of my last battle? I've gotten a lot stronger since the time Lord Shannan had to save me! ANSWER. Commend, Chat (2) I've seen the way you guys do Astra. The form's all wrong! I'd teach it to you myself, but without the Holy Blood of Isaach, I doubt you'd get very far. ANSWER. Laugh, Sigh (3) This sword was an heirloom from my mother... If I lost it, I don't know what I'd do with myself... ANSWER. Nod, Sip Tea (4) Sometimes it feels like you're looking right through me. I wonder if I've grown predictable as an opponent...  ANSWER. Laugh, Sip Tea (5) l like my clothes light and easy to move around in, but there are places where it's always snowing! ANSWER. Laugh, Chat (6) Ever meet someone you want to believe in, but makes it so damn difficult? Sometimes I wonder if a hilt to the jaw would fix 'em.  ANSWER. Disagree, Admonish (7) Back in Isaach, we believe that every debt should be repaid--both the good and the bad. I'll never forget you doin' nice things like this, but cross me and I'll make you regret it. ANSWER. Nod, Sip Tea (8) Growing up, I used to watch kids get snatched up by imperial dogs. It was awful, and the things they would do to the girls... I used to feel so weak, being unable to protect them. ANSWER. Nod, Commend (9) One day, I'm gonna find her... And then I'll prove everyone wrong! They'll all see that everything has been worth it! ANSWER. Commend

MISCELLANEOUS DIALOGUE.

GIFT GUIDE

FAVORITE GIFTS. Tasty Baked Treat, Smoked Meat, Hunting Dagger, Whetstone, Ancient Coin, Owl Feather, Training Weights, Ceremonial Sword, Exotic Spices

GIFT QUOTES

DISLIKED GIFT.  ✧

"Get this outta my face!"

LIKED GIFT.  ✧

"Thanks! I'll make sure it's put to good use."

FAVORITE GIFT.  ✧

"Looks like I'm in your debt again. Don't worry, I'm already thinkin' up a great way to repay you!"

LOST ITEMS

STAR-SHAPED AMULET. A simple wooden amulet, evidently worn. It probably belongs to someone who finds the stars sentimental. Location found: Blue Lions classroom

TASSELED TROWEL. Someone's personal farming equipment. It probably belongs to someone with humble origins. Location found: Greenhouse

CURVED SWORD. A uniquely shaped saber, meant to overwhelm an opponent with a rush of killing strikes. It probably belongs to a foreign and skilled swordmaster. Location found: Training Grounds

LOST ITEM QUOTES

OWNER.  ✧

"Shoot--can't believe I actually lost that! Thanks for the help."

NOT OWNER.  ✧

"Only a child would lose something like that."

BATTLE QUOTES

MOCK BATTLE RETREAT.  ✧

“You're lucky we weren't fighting for real...” ( *Byleth specific  ) "Professor...? Hmph! This isn't over! Next time, I'll take you down for sure!"

FIRST KILL.  ✧

"The power of Crusader Od demands I cut you down!"

MONASTERY QUOTES

CHOIR PRACTICE.  ✧

(1) "H-Hey, isn't this a little embarrassing? I've never really sung before..."

(2) "Alright, but if I catch anyone givin' me funny looks...!"

COOKING.  ✧

(1) "Oh, this? It's actually pretty easy. If it was for survival, I could help cook back at home."

(2) "Make sure you pile on lots of meat! If a meal won't make me any stronger, it's not worth having."

(3) "Let's make more than enough for everyone. If there are any siblings eating tonight, they'll fight each other for who gets to have seconds."

TUTORING

INSTRUCT

BAD.  ✧

"So that's wrong... Damn! L-Let me have another go at it!."

Critique: I need real-world application if I want stuff to stick. Console: Quit treating me like a child!

GREAT.  ✧

"I've gotta keep goin' if I want to be like mother." “That's a good point. Okay! I'll include it in my technique.”

PERFECT.  ✧

"My technique is the pride of Isaach! Nothing stands in my way!"

PRAISE. "Heh, watch your tone. I'm on track to outdoing you."

TASKS

STABLE DUTY. ✧

“It's pretty hard keepin' up with 'em during battle, but horses back in the stable are easy to maintain.”

WEEDING.  ✧

"We used to ball these up and throw them at each other when we were kids... Wanna go?"

SKY WATCH.  ✧

“Just don't look down, and you've got nothin' to be afraid of!”

CERTIFICATION EXAMS

FAILED.  ✧

"What the--That was hardly fair! Give me a weapon and I'll show you I can do it!"

PASSED.  ✧

"One step closer..."

UPDATE GOALS

AXES.  ✧

“Professor, I'm getting good at using my legs, but I feel like my arms could use some work. Let me pick up an axe! If you give me enough time, I'll be swinging it faster than the eye can see.”

FLYING.  ✧

“Man, mages and archers piss me off... Look at them, always sitting behind enemy lines and attacking from afar! I say we walk right up to 'em and knock 'em down where they stand! Professor, if you teach me how to use a mount, I can rush in and take them out before they get a chance to act.”

BRAWLING.  ✧

“I grew up having to fight for survival. If I can punch through that, I can punch through anyone. Put me on the front lines, and see how my lightning-fast fists make short work of our enemies.”

LEVEL UP

0 TO 2 STATS UP .  ✧

“Just need to try a bit harder...”

3 TO 4 STATS UP .  ✧

“Riposte, and engage. That's the form I've drilled into my body!”

5 STATS UP .  ✧

“The skills of my homeland live on through me.”

6 STATS UP .  ✧

“My sword is shining! Our enemies will fall to my Astra!”

UPON REACHING LEVEL 99 .  ✧

“Mother... Are you watching?”

BUDDING TALENT

“It's new, but I like it! Let's keep training until it's as good as my swordplay.”

NEW SKILL

“Power comes pretty naturally to me. I'll show you what I can do!”

RECLASSING .  ✧

(1) “Harder, better, it's all just training to me. ” (2) “Doesn't matter how--I move forward.” (3) “A new angle might help me find what I'm lookin' for.”

BATTLE QUOTES

WHEN SELECTED

FULL/HIGH HP .  ✧

“Eyes on the enemy.”

MEDIUM HP .  ✧

“Not gonna fail!”

LOW HP .  ✧

“Don't worry... About me...”

ENEMY DEALS 1 OR NO DAMAGE OR MISSES .  ✧

“I'm faster!”

CRTIICAL ATTACK .  ✧

“No running now!” “Die, tyrant!” “Heart and sword as one!” “Now we're fighting for real!” “This is the end for you!”

GAMBIT .  ✧

“My sword is too kind for the likes of you.”

GAMBIT BOOST .  ✧

“Leave it all to us!”

DEFEATED ENEMY .  ✧

“Tch. That's all?” “Victory or death--it's just how I fight.” “Easy pickings.”

ALLY DEFEATS ENEMY .  ✧

“We're rivals now!” “Keep going! Leave none standing!” “Heh, you're pretty good at this.”

ALLY HEALS/RALLIES .  ✧

“Caught me slacking, huh?” “Wow, I really owe you one...” “I'll put this to use.” “Hits the spot after a long battle!” “Messed up, didn't I?” “Now watch me soar!” “My sword's all yours.”

DEFEAT QUOTE

CASUAL .  ✧

“N-No... I've still got stuff to do.”

CLASSIC .  ✧

"Shannan... Mother... I've... Failed..." “Guess they... Finally got me...“

THE ADVICE BOX

"I got real mad at someone I care about, but now I'm beginning to have regrets. I'm afraid they might not want to talk to me. What do you think I should do?"

>It's okay, they'll probably forget about it if you wait enough >If they're family or a close friend, they'll forgive you once you break the silence (Correct answer) >Start another fight to prove how you were right in the first one

[dreaming-marchling]

Candle rollerskate juicebox dice mushroom planet candy tooth icecream tomato bug flower

on a scale from 1 to 10, how much do you enjoy editing? why is that?

I think I'd have to go 5. Dead center because I really love the first like 15 times I read something lol. I re-read my writing a LOT in preparation for posting. So that initial edit when it's all really fresh and then later when I'm making it all cohesive to make sure it matches with the way the story flows is great. Then it gets really miserable and tedious. The final read through before I post is like dragging myself through mud.

describe your latest wip with five emojis

🌿🐻🐍🔒🌧️

share some personal lore you never posted about before

I don't talk about books much but I'm a huge reader outside of fics too. Like I own hundreds of books.

what stops you from writing more in your free time?

I have a hard time focusing. Fighting the "I feel emotionally blah, I'm just going to mindlessly scroll" thing is a battle some days.

share a head canon for one of your favourite ships or pairings

I've not written it (yet) but I have kind of endless daydreams about Magnus using Pandemonium as an informal court for the warlocks (or just Downworlders in general but technically it's meant for the warlocks he leads) to bring him issues/requests. And then on nights when Alec is with him, this powerful Shadowhunter just drapes himself on Magnus, sits in his lap, sitting on the floor at his feet and laying his head on Magnus' leg... just not having to put on his Leader face and letting himself be Magnus' instead. Maybe only on Downworld night? And the Downworlders are unsure of how to take this but Magnus is very "he's surprisingly cuddly *shrug*" about it

name three good things going on in your life right now

I have two wonderful cats who make my home happier, I finally bought a new mattress (it's glorious) and though I'm dealing with some crap at work I do have a job that is not bad and allows me financial stability

post an unpopular opinion about a popular fandom character

I think this was the popular opinion and then the tide has since turned but I continue to loathe Nesta from the Court of Thorns and Roses series. The main justification after all those pages was like "you can't hate her, she hates herself" but like no, I can totally continue to hate her.

share some personal wisdom or a life hack you swear on

Steam a cut up head of cauliflower, slowly roast 5 to however many garlic cloves as you want in a few tablespoons of butter (or oil), combine, season, thin with a little water (especially pasta water if going on pasta) and then blend in a food processor for like a decade. Literally walk away and start cleaning up your kitchen. Blend until you worry for the motor. It'll transform into the fluffiest creamiest garlicky "alfredo" sauce that won't break and get all greasy when you reheat later. Great for batch cooking that requires reheating.

name three good things about a character you hate

Jonathan in Shadowhunters: It wasn't his fault really, he loved Clary, his little move while he was activating Clary and Jace's runes was super smooth

give yourself some constructive criticism on your own writing

I need to understand and internalize the difference between lay and lie. I can't forever go off what sounds right in my head and defying spellcheck. I'm sure some reader is like BITCH YES PLEASE lol

add 50 words to your current wip and share the paragraph here

“I will.” She promised. He hated dumping so much on her. Lying to the police, having to take care of Brian in the aftermath of something so major without him, calling everyone and having to tell their family and the team what had gone down… This was a lot to ask anyone.

They had no choice. Dom trusted her. He trusted her so fucking much.

do you have any pets? if you do, post some pictures of them

Unfortunately I am a weirdo who likes to keep all photographic evidence of my life off the internet but I do have 2 awesome cats. A tortie girl and a black boy who are littermates. They're 3 now. She never shuts up and he squeaks. She demands I wiggle the string constantly, he's literally got an anxiety disorder that in the last year has really let up its grip on him and he's like blossoming. They're great little monsters.

Thank you for asking!

[8-evil-annoying-catboys]

i think i’ve rbed this before but idk but i will give you my fall drink that never fails to delight

first step is to make homemade apple cider, but if you wish you can use store bought, just make sure it’s regular spiced cider and not the sparkling kind. but if you have a slow cooker and you can get your hands on enough apples to fill it up, that’s the best. i’ll put my apple cider recipe under a cut.

once you have your apple cider, make sure it’s nice and hot, put it on the stove for a minute if you need to, but put your hot apple cider in your cup. either fill it all the way with cider and use a chai tea bag, or fill it most of the way and use chai concentrate. add caramel syrup (which is even easier to make at home than apple cider and i bet you already have most or all of the ingredients, i’ll put a recipe for that under the cut too). maybe add whip cream or marshmallows or both, if you’re feeling decadent. it’s delicious!!

hot apple cider recipe:

slice up a combination of your fav apples (i use mostly pink ladies, and some granny smiths) and throw them into your slow cooker until it’s full. if you like citrus, you can add a combination of your fav citrus fruits too, peeled and whole. i usually add one lemon, one lime, and one orange, but you can basically do whatever you want, you could probably add different fruit here too like maybe some cranberries or pomegranate seeds/juice.

once your slow cooker is full of apples and whatever other fruit you wanna add, spice it. i usually use a full cinnamon stick or two for my medium sized crockpot, then add my pumpkin pie spice blend and just kinda eyeball it. if you don’t have pumpkin pie spice blend, it usually has, like, cinnamon, allspice, ginger, and nutmeg. use what you have, think gingerbread or pumpkin pie for the flavor profile.

now that you’ve spiced your cider ingredients, fill your slow cooker with water. then set it to low and leave it be for 12 hours. you can stir it once in a while if you want but you don’t even really have to—tbh, i usually prepare it before bed and leave my crockpot to its own devices while i sleep, so you can just let it do its thing if you don’t have time or energy to stir it.

once 12 hours has passed, take a bean/potato masher and mash up your fruit and spices. at this point, your apples should be pretty soft and easy to mash, same with your cinnamon sticks if you used them. do your best to avoid leaving any large chunks of any fruit, you want it to look like apple sauce or something.

when you’re done squishing everything into a sludge, leave it be again for another hour. you could probably even leave it for longer if you really want but it’ll be ready after an hour.

strain it through a cheesecloth, then sweeten with brown sugar to taste. if u want guidance, i usually use 1 cup of brown sugar for the entire medium size crockpot. you can also leave it unsweetened if you prefer it that way or you have friends who like less sweet things or have sugar restrictions and you wanna share with them. you can strain it and sweeten it all at once, or only enough for one cup at a time. it usually takes a long time to strain ime, so if you’re trying to serve it immediately, one cup at a time may be better for you. if you don’t have cheesecloth, you could prolly substitute coffee filters or very very fine mesh, just know that you may get a little pulp in it, especially if you’re using mesh.

serve it up and enjoy!!!!

caramel syrup:

put 3/4 cup of sugar and 1/2 cup of water together in a pot on the stove. DO NOT STIR. bring to a boil and occasionally SWIRL the pot to combine.

once the water has boiled and the sugar is dissolved, let the sugar water simmer for 15 min or so, until the mixture is a nice golden brown color. still swirl it a few times while simmering. while this is simmering, bring another, separate 1/2 cup of water to a boil (so that when you combine it, it won’t splash so much)

once your sugar water has caramelized and turned a nice golden brown, CAREFULLY whisk in the 1/2 cup of water you boiled separately. it will still splatter, for best results wear oven mitts

add 1/2 tsp of vanilla extract, stir or swirl to combine, and boom, you’re done!

Chai tea bag + lil but of brown sugar + apple cider packet + 16 oz. mug of hot but not quite boiling water

it will not Fix You but like. maybe. maybe.

[anthonyboordain]

osaka

japan. a country of my teenage fascination and obsession. a country of anthony bourdain's constant and continuous visits. a country so familiar and yet new to me.

finally, time has come in my life and i visited japan for the first time (technically third, but all others were short layovers). i spent a year researching, brainstorming, planning, reserving, and dreaming of osaka and kyoto. i was determined to experience japan.

it was a very long way to asia pacific as usual. 1am flight out of houston to taipei is rough - staying awake in the cheap ass lounge in IAH is a pain. but pain worth enduring. eva business class was as wonderful as i remembered it (except for the pre-ordered food, just stick to the normal menu).

after long flights and long immigration line at kix airport, and a train ride and a cab ride, we finally got to W osaka. what a wonderful hotel - upgrade definitely helped.

first meal - okonomiyaki. a classic osaka street food. we ended up waiting at a restaurant thinking that this is the place we wanted to go to. and we eventually realized that this was a different spot - navigating in japan is like working through a maze, you will get lost. we waited 1 hour and the place was uh-mazing. obviously the best okonomiyaki ever. the table side cooking and asking the waitress if okonomiyaki is osakan food and she gave a firm yes. and with beer and yakisoba. amazing start to the trip.

the next day, we got lost once again trying to find a quaint coffee shop. it was struggle - literally we were lost for good 10 minutes. eventually we found this shop tucked away -0.5 level below ground - a small side door as you walk down the stairs into the basement level. there was one owner - an old lady with short hair making every cup of coffee. we had wonderful cups of hot and iced coffee with cheesecake surrounded by classical music and beautiful looking saucers. the only negative was that this place is smoker friendly. but it was worth it.

umeda sky building is an engineering marvel. it has a space ship looking structure on the top connected by two escalator hanging in the air. my fear of height has gotten worse over the years but i bit my lip and went up to the top. and they didn't tell me that the elevator has glass windows lol. scary af but a trip worth making to see the grand view of osaka and the surrounding mountains.

sometimes, it's fun being a tourist. we did the most touristy thing in osaka - riding the overpriced boat by the water to see the night view of glico-san. it was so ... worth it, lol. glico-san looked vibrant and energetic. and it was good to get away from the overcrowded streets.

we wanted to try low-key down to earth japanese sushi place. we went to a casual spot and had lunch. the "normal" sushi still tasted great - tasted "plain" and "clean" in a good way. you taste the fish (the textur) and the rice. the rice isn't over flavored. it's just classic and plain but really good. the variety of sushi available was also wonderful.

osakans love meat too. the culture of yakinuku is apparently a blend of korean and japanese culture as it is served with kimchi. the meat were so fatty and buttery that you definitely need kimchi to cut through the fat. the charcoal grill and the meat quality are certainly top notch. the beef tongue filled with onion and garlic look disgusting and it is taste of heaven.

3 days in osaka was a great start to my first ever trip to japan. w osaka served up delicious breakfast buffet. there was something about japanese rice - it tastes so delicious (later i found out that it's about the water). japanese food was very simple and clean. there aren't too much food with sauce served on top - everything is assembled together and nothing too drenched. japanese people were friendly, except that there are so many rules. they get mean if you don't follow their rules lol. i couldn't believe the rule on how to stand by the takoyaki food stall and getting yelled at for putting their water into our bottle. other than that, osaka was great. city of indulgence. food and drinks were great. touristy as hell but still wonderful.

[bisluthq]

https://www.tumblr.com/bisluthq/761261493208645633/ohhh-yeah-im-not-like-anti-carb-or-anything-its

For hungry vegetarian - eat more at meals. I don’t count calories, but if you’re eating a plate of vegetables, you can typically eat twice the serving size of if you were having vegetables with a piece of meat.

There are a lot of u healthy vegetarian and vegan things, so be careful - like if you eat JUST french fries, or peanut butter sandwiches, you’re gonna be hungry and eventually probably deficient in nutrients.

With soy and tofu - this is where you want to really read the label. Where I live you can only get organic tofu, which makes it sound fancy and premium, but no, a lot of tofu and soy (especially in the USA is GMO and that’s the type of soy that fucks with your hormones and has been linked to certain breast cancer and other shit because it increases your estrogen levels). So check out the food laws in your country because what is written on the labels is different everywhere, so just be informed and make the choice you want.

Same with the fake meat - you can get some AMAZING fake meat that’s made from rice, mushrooms, eggplants and nuts. You can also get some that they don’t sell in the food aisles because it’s not considered food and all the ingredients are just numbers and science words and nothing recognisable.

I used to be mostly vegan or pescatarian for about 6 years. Add nuts to every meal. Nuts are expensive (at least here they are), but you don’t need to eat many to have a serve of nuts, so they last a while. Brazil nuts and walnuts are the ones I find most filling and they’re really nutrient dense. So if I have a salad for dinner I’ll always have a few nuts and I’m completely full.

If you’re looking for recipes, and depending on what season you’re into - soup is so good for vegan/ veg! Like hell yeah pumpkin soup, vegetable soup, tomato soup 😋 but I could honestly live off soup in winter, it’s one of my fave things to eat lol.

If you’re still eating eggs, frittata and quiche are pretty easy to make, you can put anything in them and like I said earlier, you can have a bigger serving size because you need that big a portion but it’s not like you’re gonna feel stuffed unless you stuff yourself. It’s kind of like how if you’re drinking coke you’ll have one can, but if you’re having water you will drink 8 times as much… you don’t need 8 times as much food, but just that attitude of ‘this is nourishing it’s ok to eat more, because my body literally needs it’ and most people are used to eating a side serve of salad of vegetables, but you need to have a full meal sized serve of it now.

With protein, a lot of it can be found in grains - I love risotto and fried rice style things, or like Nat and others have said, quinoa, beans and lentils and other stuff you like can really thicken up a meal.

We couldn’t afford to eat meat every day when I was a kid, so I grew up sort of vegetarian based anyway. But even when we had things like lasagna we would put a can of lentils and beans into the meat mix because it made the meat go further. If you do meals like a stew, soup - anything with a runny consistency or a sauce/ gravy type thing, you can blend lentils or beans into it and it’ll make the sauce thicker but is like a hidden way of eating them lol.

If you’re someone who wants to count calories and macros to know you’re getting enough of all those nutrients, you can probably use an app like My Fitness pal, or also just google things like “protein in green beans” and it comes up as the result. So you can build a list of the things you like and then make recipes around it to get an idea how much protein, carbs, calories etc are in your food - not to be a “you need to count calories” but if you’re changing your diet, it’s just good to know what you’re eating you know.

very good advice!

[enfyswanders]

Glasgow, Scotland: August 4-14, 2024

I had such plans for Glasgow and Edinburgh. I had multiple tickets to Edinburgh Fringe shows, I was going to attend a couple days of WorldCon, I bought a ticket for a bus tour of the highlands, I booked yet another high tea at a fancy place, I wanted to go to this bakery that puts swear words on their cookies, and I just wanted to explore both cities at length.

But none of that happened, because after taking a rest day following my travels on Monday, on Tuesday, August 6 I tested positive for COVID and spent the rest of my time in Scotland isolating in my hotel room. I assume I got it from the conference I spoke at the week prior, though I was very careful with masking.

So I spent 9 days feeling cruddy and isolating in my hotel room instead of seeing Scotland, which is a massive bummer.

Getting sick also necessitated my final Adventure in Doing Laundry being another pickup/delivery service, though this was a local service that was much cheaper than the one in Manchester, and they did same-day pickup and delivery, which was really nice. I'm thankful to the Rick Steves guide for recommending the Majestic Laundrette for this service.

I managed a couple brief, masked, walking/shopping excursions in Glasgow City Centre on days 7 and 8 of the infection and took a few photos. A small delight was seeing some bagpipe bands perform in the plaza next to my hotel, as part of the Piping Live! event running August 8-18.

Backing up, though, on my rest day August 5, before I got sick, I did have one adventure I'm quite pleased with.

The week prior, I hadn't eaten very well. Glastonbury has a number of excellent cafes, but they all close at 4 pm. For dinner, the options are pub food, fish & chips, takeaway Indian, and a couple expensive restaurants. So I mostly ate takeaway pizza and fish and chips all week. By the time I got to Glasgow, I wanted some good food.

In my Google Maps restaurant searches in Glasgow, I found a place called Six by Nico that was intriguing. Every six weeks, they have a new, fixed-price, six-course menu built around a theme. I booked a reservation for that night and holy crap was it amazing. Traveling solo for so long had really given me decision fatigue, and this was a great opportunity to walk into a restaurant, basically just say, "fuck me up," and be brought a bunch of food. No decisions necessary.

The menu was themed on the Amalfi Coast when I went.

Here's a better view of the courses I had:

Course 1 was Parmesan Polenta. My notes: "OMG there's a mushroom party in my mouth and everyone's invited. Is it soup? Is it foam with a bunch of mushrooms in it? Who cares, I need it in my face."

Course 2: Heirloom Tomato. My notes: "So many different tomato flavors, with bits of cream and olive. Love." I also got an Amalfi Breeze cocktail, which was super refreshing. Love the charred lime garnish.

Course 3: Spaghetti Nero. My notes: "So many fun textures. Little crunchies, creamy, and soft. Nice blend of flavors though I can't taste the chili."

Course 4: Black Pollock. My notes: "Have I ever had fish this perfectly cooked? Crunchy outside, perfectly hot and tender inside. Basil sauce surprisingly subtle. Zucchini is nice too."

Course 5: Trio of Pork. My notes: "This is the first time I've heard the phrase "ham jam." [My server described it as such, though the menu calls it "pancetta jam."] Pork 1 delightfully smoky, like good bacon. Ham jam surprisingly good, somewhere between a thick chutney and crumbled sausage in texture. Bacon-wrapped sausage(?) spicy but nice. Also, I'm getting really full and glad there's only dessert left after this."

Course 6: Delizia al Limone. No, that's not a stick of butter on the plate. My (bleary with oncoming food-coma) notes: "Cold, creamy, lemony, rich white chocolate fudge(?), so refreshing after the heavy pork"

So I'm glad I had one little adventure in Glasgow before I got sick.

One other nice thing was that my day passes for WorldCon included access to their online content, which was plentiful and enjoyable. I got to see several panels on interesting topics from the comfort of my hotel room. A particular favorite was one on Shakespeare, King James, and Scottish Witch Trials. They also had a lot of queer-focused content, which I appreciated.

Some random funny things:

New burlesque name just dropped.

2. I do not like how my coronation chicken on baguette sandwich was labeled.

3. The airsick bag on IcelandAir is...something.

I flew home August 14 from Glasgow to Rekjavik to Baltimore, N95 masked the whole way (I didn't even dare eat on the plane). The descents were murder on my poor ears, but I was very glad to be home, even if I had to isolate in the guest house for a couple days before I finally tested negative.

[whatsaudreythinkingabout]

i have a soup recipe that works well for me! it’s not very hard to make, everything’s puréed so texture shouldn’t be much of a problem, & it’s also got a fuckton of garlic in it for all my garlic girls if you’re worried about taste.

it started out as a recipe i found online for pastina soup, but i realized i liked the base of the soup on its own bc the pasta would get soggy if you kept it for too long. i’ll link the OG recipe at the end but anyways:

ingredients:

6 cups broth of your choice (ideally bone broth if you can afford it; it’s a little pricey but it’s worth it for all the nutrients you’re getting, there’s a few brands but kettle & fire has the most protein & least sodium. if not, chicken or vegetable broth can also work) (you can also adjust this depending on how thick or thin you want your soup to be)

1 whole onion (OG recipe calls for brown or yellow but you can use p much any variety)

2 large carrots

2 celery stalks

several cloves of garlic (OG recipe says 4 cloves but if there’s one thing i know it’s always add way more garlic than the recipe calls for, i sometimes use a whole bulb)

salt & pepper to taste (i use garlic salt; lawry’s is my go-to brand)

1/2 cup water (i like to use leftover pasta water for extra starch)

optional (from OG recipe):

pastina (this is only if you want to; i personally like just the broth bc the pasta gets mushy after a while if you keep it too long)

1 bay leaf (i personally like to add it but you do you)

1 parmesan rind (adds some extra umami to the broth)

my modifications (also optional):

1 leek (bc why not)

1 head roasted garlic (in addition to the other garlic; the more you chop garlic the more intense the flavor gets so the two different types of garlic give it a more complex flavor)

garnish with:

olive oil

grated parmesan

parsley

more salt & pepper

instructions:

if adding roasted garlic, prep this first; cook at 400°F for 30-40 mins so it’ll be ready by the time the soup is done simmering (how-to linked at end). save the chopped-off tips of the garlic (& any loose cloves) for the soup

rough chop your vegetables (carrots, onions, celery, not-roasted garlic, optional leek; this basically means chopped into big enough pieces that they can still be fished out later)

pour broth into soup pot on stove; add vegetables, salt, pepper, optional bay leaf/parm rind & simmer for 20 mins covered on medium-high heat.

kill the heat & transfer vegetables to blender w colander or slotted spoon; fish out optional bay leaf/parm rind & discard if used, add water & optional roasted garlic & blend until fully puréed. if you’re having trouble getting it completely smooth, start blending slower & gradually increase the speed.

pour blended veg back into broth, return heat, stir until fully combined & continue to season as needed. add pastina here if desired; bring soup to boil until al dente.

serve in bowls while hot, garnish as desired

enjoy! i also recommend serving with some good bread, sourdough or focaccia especially

the final product should look smth like this!

store any leftovers in the fridge; they should keep for about a week.

works cited:

original pastina recipe: https://cookingwithayeh.com/italian-pastina-soup/

how to roast garlic: https://www.simplyrecipes.com/recipes/roasted_garlic/

in addition, you also don’t have to eat it as soup! you can add it to sauces as an extra secret ingredient (smth i did with my mac & cheese when i had leftovers), or if it’s thick enough (adjusted so there’s more purée than broth) you can use it as a sauce on its own!

edit: EXTRA NOTE BC THIS IS IMPORTANT. if you have leftovers that you wanna reheat, HEAT IT ON THE STOVETOP. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, DO NOT MICROWAVE IT. i say this bc 1. i brought some to my friend when she was sick & she said it made her (very small) apartment smell like shit for 2 days straight (even tho it smelled good in the fridge), and 2. when i did it (bc i was in a hurry to pack lunch before work) it gave it kind of a weird aftertaste.

i mean this in the gentlest way possible: you need to eat vegetables. you need to become comfortable with doing so. i do not care if you are a picky eater because of autism (hi, i used to be this person!), you need to find at least some vegetables you can eat. find a different way to prepare them. chances are you would like a vegetable you hate if you prepared it in a stew or roasted it with seasoning or included it as an ingredient in a recipe. just. please start eating better. potatoes and corn are not sufficient vegetables for a healthy diet.