#all she cares about is her illusion of a 'whole happy family'

[homeless202]

tfw when your parents don't remember that one thing they did, that completely broke you, radically shifted your path in life and severely altered both your brain chemistry and world view.

your reality crumbled around you one day bc of sth they said or did, and to them it was so insignificant and trivial it wasn't even worth remembering.

and now he's doubting and blaming himself. he's regretting making that decision based on something so irrelevant to everyone else but meant the world to him.

[chiefduckgarden]

The other woman

Wanda Maximoff x Williams!Reader

Natasha Romanoff x Williams!Reader

Royal AU

Angst - Cheating - Forced Marriage - If you love Natasha don't read this. (really)

Summary:

W: Young people fall in love with the wrong people sometimes.

N: You can think that you're in love when you're really just engaged.

A/N: Reader's last name is Williams, it's easier to write this way. This has been in my drafts for months lol. I saw a Tik Tok edit of the Corpse Bride and thought of this. Still not sure about how it turned out though.

- Stop being so silly Y/N, you know I will miss you just as much as you're going to miss me - Wanda said smiling, her head resting on your chest while one of your hands rubbed her back up and down.

- I know, I just wish I could stay here with you, I don't care about this stupid trip, I'd rather be here for your birthday, for that giant celebration your father is planning - you said, looking down into her eyes.

- You've been here for each and every one of my birthdays since we were 12, nothing will happen if you miss this one, even if it's "especial", I understand you have to go with your parents - she replied.

You huffed.

- I don't even know why I have to go in the first place, they have always gone by themselves, I don't know why I'm required this time - you explained - And I don't like it either, they're up to something, I can feel it.

She cupped your cheek and pecked your lips.

- You're their only daughter, their only Princess, the only heir for their kingdom, maybe they want to give you more responsibilities from now on... You're gonna be Queen someday, it's time you get prepared for it...

- I've been preparing for it my whole life - you sighed - But you're right, maybe it's time for me to take it seriously.

You stared at her and smiled.

- And maybe I can talk to them in this trip about us - you said, and her eyes sparkled with illusion at your words - I'll tell them I'm marrying you, and we'll plan the proposal for when we get back.

- Are you serious my love? Will you ask my hand in marriage? - she asked happily.

- Of course I will, I want to spend the rest of my life by your side.

She kissed you and you smiled.

- Also, I have to beat that Jarvis Prince - you said - I've heard the rumors, but if I ask you first and you accept me, there will not be any reason for us to not get married.

- Your royal highness, it's time to leave, the King asked for your presence - you heard a voice calling for you.

- On my way - you replied.

- Come back to me my love, and have fun in your trip - Wanda said, kissing you one last time.

- I'll be back in no time, and then, it'll be just us, for eternity my lady.

- For eternity Y/N... - she replied.

------------

4 months later.

The King and the Queen of Williams Kingdom are happy to announce the engagement of their heir, Princess Y/N, with the noble Princess Natasha Romanoff.

The Royal Family announced the happy news during their stay in the Romanoff Kingdom.

This makes young Romanoff the future Queen to the rightful heir to the throne of Williams House. The union of this two families represents one of the most important alliances in the last decades, the two kingdoms will surely benefit from this marriage.

It seems like love has been in the air from some time now, let's remember just a month ago the Maximoff family announced the marriage of their youngest daughter Princess Wanda and the future King Vision Jarvis, on her 18th birthday celebration.

Good luck to these new happy couples and the best of luck for all of them.

--------

- Don't act like you didn't knew about it! You fooled me! - you screamed in exasperation pacing around the room with the newsletter in your hand.

- We didn't knew Maximoff would get the girl married so early, but yes, there's no reason to lie, we knew about the wedding - your father told you.

- It was all planned, wasn't it? This trip, meeting Natasha, Wanda's birthday celebration - you mentioned harshly - You played with us like we were chess pieces, you decided our lives without asking us anything...

- There was nothing to ask, your little teenage romance with Wanda was senseless, she was promised to Jarvis even before they were born... And you, we waited for the right girl to come to your life, for the perfect Queen for you to love... And that is Natasha...

- YOU DON'T GET TO DECIDE THAT! THAT WAS MY CHOICE! - you screamed, you couldn't handle listen to him anymore.

- Well it's not! I am the King and I know what's best for you and for the kingdom! And as long as this crown is perched on my head you will obey each and every one of my orders, especially those orders that relate to the future of my legacy!

You took a step back, not believing what your father was saying.

- You're gonna marry Natasha Romanoff and get the biggest alliance in the history of our family and that's a direct order, not from your father, but from your King!

That was it. Those last words made you understand that, whatever you had left to say would be pointless. The King made a decision, and there was no turning back.

You lowered you head, and nodded.

- Yes, your Majesty.

Holding back the tears from your breaking heart you had the courage to ask for one more thing.

- Tell Natasha I'll meet her in our residence back at home, I need to travel now to talk with Wanda about this decision and finish everything in the best way possible. We're still friends, and for the sake of our friendship with the Maximoff House it would be wise to keep our alliance with them.

Your father took a few seconds to process your request but finally nodded.

- That's okay, you can go now.

Bowing down once more you left the room with tears already falling down your face.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Stopping your horse right in front of the small cabin placed in the middle of the woods your heart was pounding like crazy. When you made it inside and saw those beautiful green eyes it finally explode in love.

- Y/N! My love - she said the moment you walked in, running into your arms.

You hugged her immediately and both of you melted in a heated passion kiss after all those months separated.

- My lady... My Wanda... How you've been my love? I know life must have been hell for you just as it's been for me - you said, with your arms still around the girl.

- Oh you have no idea... They made me marry Vision the same day of my birthday, without warning. When I told my father it was you the one I loved he told me I was crazy - she started to cry - He said it was ridiculous because you were already engaged to another woman, promised to someone else. It broke my heart because I realized we had fallen in their trap my love, they made the choices for us.

- I know, I realized that too, and when I confront my father about it... - you gulped at the memory - He yelled at me like never before and command me to get marry, not as my father, but as my king.

Wanda whipped away a tear that was rolling down your cheek.

- I didn't know they were gonna announce an engagement until the day before. They gave me no choice - you said, now both of you were sitting in the edge of the bed.

- Is Natasha aware of your your displeasure? - she asked.

You shook your head.

- No, I don't think so, she was very excited when they announced the engagement... She thinks it's all genuine.

- Vision thinks as well, he thinks I want him... Even though I have refused to sleep with him...

You looked at her worried. Heartbroken. Not even you had dare to touch her in a passionate way.

- What are we going to do my love? They took everything from us, even our freedom...

She sighed.

- I don't know... I'm just sure I don't want us to end, we are soul mates Y/N, you are the love of my life... I don't care if you're married to someone else as long as I know I'm the only one for you... Because you're the only one for me...

- Wanda, in my world there's only you and then the rest of the people. I don't care about Vision or Natasha, we love each other and that is all that matters...

- But how are we going to make this work? They can get suspicious...

- We were best friends before this ridiculous circus started, and it doesn't have to change now... We just have to be careful on how we act... - you paused for a few seconds to cup her face - Although I don't think i could ever hide this love I feel for you, it's very intense...

She smiled at your words.

- Me neither, but we'll try our best... - she looked around the little comfy cabin you were in - And also, we will always have this place for us, only you and I know about it, it will keep our secret safe.

You nodded and kissed her. It became heated every second, until she was sitting on your lap and your arms were around her waist, holding her close to your body.

- Wanda... - you said in a whisper between kisses - We need to stop, or either way I will...

- Do it - she said looking straight into your eyes, her green big eyes now full of desire - Take me Y/N, make me yours, i want you to be my first...

You looked at her, the knot on your lower stomach increasing.

- Are you sure?

She didn't respond, with her lower lip trapped between her teeth she grabbed your hand and guided your palm to her breast. You squeezed it, causing her to moan.

- God... - you whispered.

With a quick flip you turned the position, now she was laid on the bed, with you on top.

- Make love to me, darling - she said.

That night, your affair got sealed with the intertwine of your bodies.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

- And this is the main room, it's spacious and comfortable for the two of us - you said to Natasha, showing your future bedroom - The right room it's for me, and the left side is yours Princess Natasha, and we have the common space room right in the middle.

Natasha nodded but frowned.

- Why do we have separate beds? I thought we were sharing the same bedroom...

You smiled shaking your head.

- Oh no, we'll have the same room but I would feel more comfortable with my own space - you said walking into your side - But feel free to redecorate the whole room, change whatever you like, even my side, just leave my closet as it is right now.

She followed you confused.

- Where are you going? - she asked - We have my parents' farewell dinner tonight, tomorrow they'll go home.

- I know, I will go play tennis with Princess Wanda and then I'll meet you at the dinner - you said, walking into your closet to change your clothes.

- Princess Wanda? Again? You went out with her last week.

- Yes, you know she's my best friend, we both play tennis every week, it's our favorite sport - you said.

Natasha nodded. She didn't understand the reason behind your distance, at first she thought it was because you didn't know her before your visit at her kingdom, but now, after spending some weeks with you and failed tries on bonding with you she was very confused.

- I'll see you later - you said, walking out from your closet and giving her a kiss on the cheek.

- Okay - she answered.

She spent the rest of the evening choosing the colors, the carpets and selecting fabrics for your new room. She was loving the result, but wishing you were there to help her out.

- Do you think Princess Y/N will like this color for her bed? - she asked her maid, showing her the color tone she had choose.

- Oh it's beautiful, she will love it - the woman answered.

Natasha smiled, really hoping you will like it.

- You've known the princess since she was a kid, right? - Romanoff asked the woman again.

- Yes, I've been working for the Royal Family since 15 years ago...

Natasha kept silent for some second before asking again.

- Do you know how close is Princess Y/N with Princess Wanda Maximoff? I know they're best friends but I'm just curious about their friendship...

- Oh they are very very close, they grew up together and used to make everything side by side... They had the same private tutors, a lot of sleepovers, they both love tennis...

Natasha nodded, not wanting to listen more, but the woman kept talking.

- Princess Y/N used to write a lot of letters for Princess Wanda, every week, and Princess Wanda wrote for her too, the letters should be somewhere in here, she keeps them very well preserved... They're very special for each other - the woman smiled at the memory.

Nat cleared her throat and left the fabrics on the bed.

- It's time for me to get ready for dinner, please take all this out of the room and bring the dress.

- Yes your royal highness - the woman said, following the instructions.

Once alone, Natasha made some deep thinking. She didn't want to create false scenarios in her head, but since she met you, you had done nothing but talk about Wanda and spend time with her.

But she didn't had the time to over think because you stepped in the room in that moment. The happiness in your face could be notice from a thousand miles away.

- Natasha? I thought you would be on your way to dinner already... - you said.

- Oh I lost track of time with the decorations and everything, my dress will be here in any minute - she answered, and you nodded - Also, I think our parents will expect to see us coming in together...

You sighed and walked into your side of the room.

- Yes, I think you're right, I'm gonna take a bath and get ready - you said.

Before you could leave she asked.

- How was tennis with Princess Wanda? I can see you're really happy.

You froze for a second but then raised your head with a small smile.

- Yes, it was really funny... It's always funny.

You started walked again but she stopped your tracks once more, making you tense immediately with her next words.

- Maybe you can teach me, I'll go with you next time.

You didn't say anything, just slightly nodded your head and walked out.

Natasha was afraid that maybe she was trying to force herself into your daily activities, she didn't want bother you in any way, or make you upset with her.

But when you meet her again in the car that night, suddenly your behavior towards her changed dramatically.

You treated her kind and lovely the whole night. For the first time she felt like she was your fiancé and not just some random stranger that came into your life.

But the fairytale broke down the moment you stepped into your house. You only said goodnight to her and leave to go to your bed.

She wondered what she could've possibly done to make you upset again.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

For the next weeks you kept your distance for her like before, only talking to her when it was necessary. And she was starting to get pissed.

- I just want to know what can I do to make you feel closer to me... I've been trying for weeks to connect with you but nothing ever change. Just tell me what's wrong, so we can fix it.

You've been arguing for the last twenty minutes, you told her you'd go to play tennis and she started to yell at you.

- There's nothing to fix, because nothing is wrong Natasha... I just have a hard time to open myself with new people...

- But I'm not new people, I'm your fiancé, we're gonna get married Y/N, let's start acting like a couple for once.

You sighed. Tired.

- What do you want me to do? I just don't feel comfortable yet...

- Oh but you're not even trying, everyday you find something to get yourself busy with, and your spare time goes all in tennis and Princess Wanda... When will you have time for me?

You heart stopped. How dare she to even pronounce Wanda's name.

- Wanda has nothing to do with this - you said, almost in a whisper.

- I know, I'm not blaming her for anything, I'm blaming you...

You were about to say something when the butler knocked the door.

- Excuse me ma'am, Princess Wanda Maximoff is here for the tennis practice, she's waiting for you in the main hall.

You fixed your messy clothes and answered.

- Thanks, tell her I'll be with her in a minute.

- Yes your royal highness.

The butler left, leaving you and Natasha alone again.

- I need to go - you said, without looking at her.

- I know - she contained the tears - Just leave, I also need to go, I'm having tea with your mother later.

You nodded and walked out, with her following you some steps behind.

When you made it to the first floor your bad mood changed completely at the sight of your lover.

- Wanda, it's so nice to see you! Ready for tennis? - you asked, kissing her right hand and cheeks.

- Yes, let's go! - she replied.

When two guards followed you she quickly stopped them.

- Oh we're taking the horses, no need for security, just two best friends riding and playing... The Princess and I will be fine.

- Yes, don't worry, I'll be back in a few hours - you completed.

- Of course ma'am - your guards nodded.

Natasha saw the whole interaction, her eyes burning in jealousy. She knew Wanda was your best friend, but her instincts were screaming her something was off. She decided to ask your mother that afternoon.

--------------------------

- Oh dear lord! - Wanda screamed in pure bliss, three of your fingers buried deep inside her intimacy, you leaving small kisses all along her jaw and neck.

- Go on my lady, let me see you reach euphoria once more...

- Yeah... - she panted - Take me to heaven again Y/N, just keep doing that...

Your moans were hidden by the walls of the small cabin.

- Y/N... I'm gonna...

You felt her orgasm crash on your fingers, her wetness dripping down your hands and rolling down her thighs.

- Wanda... - you panted, taking the three fingers to your mouth - Oh God... - you moaned - You're so magical...

She smiled at you, wasting no time and kissing you as deep as she could, tasting herself in your mouth.

A few moments later you were both tangled in each other's arms, resting after your love making evening.

- Oh how I wish I could wake up every day inside your arms - she said with her head resting on your chest.

- I know, I would make love to you every morning and every night... I would take care of your sleep, watch you fall asleep into my arms, giving a goodnight kiss in the forehead...

A tear rolled down her face.

- We would be happy...

You nodded.

- Yes... So happy.

She stared at you for some seconds before speaking again.

- Are you happy? - she asked.

- What do you mean? You know I'm not - you answered, confused.

- I know, but you have a wife, Princess Natasha is beautiful... Have you bonded with her already?

You denied, shaking your head.

- Not really, I spend all my time doing my duties and my spare time I spend it with you...

She smiled sheepishly.

- Has she notice your absence?

You sighed.

- Yeah, just this morning before you came we were arguing about it... She wants me to spend more time with her...

- Same with Vision - she said - He wants me to go with him in this trip he's having next month... I don't think I'll can refuse

You blink confused.

- Does that mean I will not see you? For how long?

Your heart shredded.

- Three weeks...

- Oh...

She immediately sensed your mood change.

- But I will came back to you... Like always.

- I know... I trust you, I don't trust Vision though...

- Don't worry, no matter what happens I will always be yours.

- I'll always be yours too.

- Take this time to be with Natasha, calm her down and win her trust, it's your wife after all.

You sighed and nodded.

- I'll do whatever you ask me to... - you said kissing her hand.

She fell silent for a few moments. You turned to look at her and saw in her expression what was happening. She was thinking… processing something.

- What's wrong, my love? - you asked - What's going on in that beautiful mind of yours?

She looked into your eyes, gazing at you for a moment before speaking.

- I want you to marry Natasha during my absence… I need you to seal your commitment to her while I'm not here. If I'm not present, I won't have to attend to the wedding, and I won't have to endure the pain of seeing you marry someone else… If you don't do it within those weeks, I'll be forced to attend your wedding, and I… I don't think I can bear it, Y/N… I won't be able to.

She was right. Due to your trip to the Romanoff realm, you didn't have to be present at Wanda's sudden wedding. You didn't have to go through the pain of seeing her standing at the altar with someone else. It wouldn't be fair to her to see you with Natasha.

You nodded and kissed her forehead. Both of you were crying, and you held her hand.

- I promise I will - you said - For you, Wanda. I just want you to know that even if it's Natasha to whom I vow love and eternal devotion at the altar, my words and my heart will always belong to you and only you.

That evening, you returned home with a heavy heart. But to your misfortune, the tragedies wouldn't stop that day. As soon as you passed through the grand and elegant door adorning your entrance, you saw your father's guards waiting. That only meant he was visiting, and that couldn't be good.

- Your Royal Highness - a man bowed before you - Your Majesty, King Williams is in the main study waiting for you.

You surveyed your surroundings before responding. Everything was in overwhelming silence. You looked for your butler and inquired - Is Princess Natasha at home?

- No, Your Highness, Princess Natasha is still visiting the royal palace with the queen, your mother," he responded.

You took a deep breath - I see - you cleared your throat - I will speak with my father right away. If the princess returns home, please notify me immediately. It is of the utmost importance that I speak with her.

You turned and made your way to the study. With every step you took, you could feel your heart beating stronger. You knew what was coming. As soon as you crossed that door, your father would reproach you for not paying enough attention to Natasha. You were nervous about the reprimand, but it was somewhat reassuring to know that this time you had an answer to his accusations.

- Your Majesty - you spoke, but he didn't look at you - To what do I owe the pleasure of your visit, Father? - You walked over and took a seat across from him. It was only then that you noticed his cold gaze.

- I'm afraid my visit won't bring you any pleasure, Y/N - he said - Your wife paid a visit today to your mother; they had tea together.

- I'm aware of that, Natasha mentioned it this morning - you said, trying to sound confident.

- My question here is, where were you? - he asked.

- I played tennis with Princess Wanda most of the afternoon, and we went riding for a while. I lost track of time between the game and our conversation... - you explained but your father interrupted you.

- Natasha told us where you were… She also mentioned some more interesting things about those little escapades of yours with Princess Wanda… I didn't like what I heard at all, Y/N - he said.

- Father, Wanda and I…- you began, but he interrupted.

- Wanda and you are no more, it ended the moment she got married and you became engaged - he shouted - Don't you understand? Natasha suspects you and Wanda, she has doubts about her marriage, this is very serious, Y/N. It could trigger political problems and destabilize our marriage agreements with her kingdom. As the heir to this realm, you have a responsibility to your people and to me. I cannot allow your actions to jeopardize our political stability. It's important that you maintain a strong relationship with Natasha and avoid any suspicion about your relationship with Wanda.

- There is nothing between Wanda and me, Father… we had something in the past, as you well know, but now she is married. It hasn't been easy for me, but I believe it's time to stabilize the situation. Wanda will be going on a trip with Prince Jarvis, and today we discussed my wedding. She encouraged me to get married as soon as possible to reassure Natasha about our marriage… I want to have the wedding in two weeks - you explained.

- Is that so… - he looked at you, analyzing - Well, so be it. Let's not delay any further. As soon as I return to the palace, I will inform your mother about your decision, and we will proceed with the necessary preparations. There's no turning back from this.

- You may think you've appeased me with your sudden decision to marry, but you can't deceive me, Y/N. The matters you have with Wanda… put an end to them. I am giving you the opportunity to do it on your terms. Remember that you are the heir; you must find a way to balance your personal feelings with your responsibilities as the future queen. I don't want to take drastic measures, but if you can't control this situation, I will have to intervene… and then I assure you, you will never see Wanda again - he warned.

Your father left your home, and the next morning, the entire kingdom was aware of your wedding. Natasha was in total ecstasy. As soon as you informed her of the date, she kissed you fervently and headed to the palace to begin preparations for your wedding.

No matter how hard you tried, you couldn't muster a spark of excitement. You seemed like a walking corpse. But your father's threats echoed in your mind, and you forced yourself to be the perfect fiancée for Natasha. In front of people, you looked like the ideal couple, planning the dream wedding together. But deep inside, you were dying to leave it all behind and run into Wanda's arms.

After two weeks that felt like an eternity, the day finally arrived. You were just hours away from getting married. Natasha was getting ready at the palace with her mother, while you prepared in the privacy of your home.

In that intimate moment, you allowed yourself to write a letter to Wanda, letting your heart speak and conveying all your love and devotion for her. When you finished, you placed it in the pocket of your shirt, right over your heart, and prepared to leave. You would find a way to deliver it to her later.

The moment had come. The entire kingdom was waiting. Natasha, her parents, and your parents were all there. It seemed like the most meticulously planned event of the year, with nothing missing. But to you, everything was missing because even though you were about to get married, the love of your life was not there.

The ceremony had passed quickly. You felt like your soul had left your body, but it was your turn to speak.

- Dear Natasha...

Wanda, thousands of kilometers away, knew what was happening. Her heart ached at the thought of you becoming someone else's wife today. She only found peace in remembering your words, knowing that any promise you made to Natasha today would truly be for her.

- Today, before all the witnesses from our respective kingdoms, I make this sacred commitment. I promise to be loyal and faithful in body and spirit, and always honor the alliance we have forged, an alliance that in my heart is deeper than others may understand. On sunny days and in dark nights, I will stand by your side, fulfilling the duties entrusted to us. I promise to be your unwavering support, your confidante, and your closest friend, even when our differences challenge us. Though our paths may seem divergent, in my heart, you will always be present. May our souls find solace in this commitment, and may our union, despite the hardships, shine as a beacon of hope in this realm. May the love I have for you, though I may not openly name it, guide my actions and thoughts as we fulfill our destiny. May our marriage, though not the one we would have chosen, be a source of strength and wisdom for us both. So I promise, with all the sincerity and respect you deserve.

Natasha smiled. You both kissed. Wanda cried. You cried. You touched your chest, where Wanda's letter resided, and smiled despite the tears.

When the wedding was over and you and Natasha were back home, you couldn't make love to her. You touched her, yes. She felt loved, yes. But you didn't feel anything. Your body belonged to Wanda. You didn't let Natasha touch you. As soon as it was over, you headed to the bathroom to take a shower.

Natasha, savoring the last moments of innocence, believing that you were completely hers, took your shirt in her hands to smell your perfume once more. She loved your scent. But as she brought the garment to her nose, she felt the stiffness of paper in her hands. Curiously, she took the letter from the pocket, and in a matter of seconds, everything fell apart.

There, in her hands, was the proof of your eternal love for Wanda. A letter, written a couple of hours ago, before joining your life with hers, where you professed your eternal devotion to another woman.

My Wanda:

As I write these words, my heart is filled with a love that cannot be contained or constrained by the circumstances surrounding us. In the dark hours leading up to my forced marriage, I want you to know that my love and devotion belong to you, and you alone.

Although the world has forced us down different paths, and we are destined to marry others, I want you to know that my heart will always be yours. Our love is a fire that burns deep within me, a fire that no arranged marriage can extinguish.

Every moment we share, every stolen glance, every whispered word in secret, is a treasure in my memory that I hold dear with all my being. You are the light that brightens my life, the reason I smile amidst the darkness of our situation.

Though words cannot fully express the magnitude of what I feel for you, I want you to know that I am willing to face whatever is necessary to protect our love, even if it means sacrificing some of my own happiness. I am bound by word and paper, but my body, mind, soul, and heart will always belong to you.

No matter what the future holds for us, rest assured that you will always be my love, my confidante, and my deepest longing. Our love is a secret that only we share, a bond that no one can break.

When I stand at the altar, reciting my vows to someone I did not choose, rest assured that my heart will beat for you and only you, as I promised. I will keep our love in a special and safe place in my heart, dreaming of the future that was stolen from us, where we are together without restrictions.

With all my love and devotion, always yours.

Y/N.

There, Natasha knew it. There was no turning back. She had married someone who didn't love her. You weren't hers, and you never would be.

As soon as you emerged from the bathroom, you saw Natasha holding the letter in her hands, tears streaming down her cheeks. She knew.

- Natasha...

- You lied to me.

- No, I didn't lie to you… My father forced me… they separated us, Natasha.

- All this time, I've been a fool… and you! - she pointed at you, shouting, crying inconsolably - How could you deceive me like this?

- You don't understand, you never will. It was never my intention to hurt you, Natasha…

- You've betrayed me, Y/N… you married me while all this time you were thinking about your mistress - Natasha cried.

At that moment, you lost your temper. You would never let anyone speak of Wanda in such a way.

- Don't speak of her like that. Wanda is not to blame. Don't ever say her name again… never - you asserted.

She laughed bitterly, wiping the tears from her face - It is what it is, Y/N, nothing more than your mistress…

It was then that you shouted - Don't you understand? You are the other woman in all of this… she and I were happy, she's the love of my life. Until they forced us apart. Titles don't matter, Natasha. She will always be my priority. YOU ARE THE OTHER WOMAN.

- NO! You are married to me! She is the other woman - Natasha shouted back.

You ran your hand through your hair in desperation. You sat down on the bed with your hands on your face. Natasha was crying, standing.

- I don't love you, Natasha. My father forced me to marry you. The day I saw Wanda for the last time, she asked me to have the wedding as soon as possible. I only moved forward with the plans because she requested it. You must understand that there is no one else for me but her.

Natasha looked at you, heartbroken.

- My kingdom needs yours for its resources; our union is the largest and most important due to the size of your realm. On the other hand, you need my kingdom for our reserves, as long as you are married to me, there will be stability. This marriage benefits us all, and I need us to cooperate to provide the peace our people deserve.

You explained, and she knew it was true.

- The kingdom of Wanda is small; it didn't serve much purpose to unite us. Besides, her parents had promised her hand to Prince Jarvis since she was born. We had everything against us, Natasha. We still have everything against us - you said - I'm sorry that I can't be the partner you desire, but unfortunately, the story of my life was written long before I met you. I belong to Wanda, and Wanda belongs to me. You need me, and I need you. The union is done, but you must know that I can't love you as you desire, I never will.

By this point, Natasha was just sobbing. You got up from the bed and walked to your side of the room.

- We have breakfast with our families tomorrow. We must be at the palace at nine o'clock.

You left the room, and your body felt more relaxed. You wouldn't have to pretend anymore.

Time passed, and Wanda returned from her trip. As soon as she set foot on land, she ran to find you at the cabin. She tearfully told you that Jarvis had been with her. He wanted an heir. With desperation and desire, you claimed her body for hours.

Months later, when her son was born, Natasha and you visited the couple in their palace. Wanda smiled as she showed you the little one. He was so much like Wanda that you cried with emotion. In that small moment when you held little Tommy, and Wanda sang to him beside you, you allowed yourself to dream of what could have been. The future and happiness that were denied to you. For a brief moment, you pretended that this was your little family. And you cried. You cried for everything that was taken from you.

Natasha, who watched everything from afar, finally understood. Wanda and you loved each other and would love each other forever. She could never compete with her.

She was just another piece in the chessboard that life played. She couldn't do anything else but resign herself. In the end, no one was happy. Not her. Not you. Not Wanda. Everyone was miserable because of someone else's desires. But that's how life was, and like the others, she had to accept it.

[jinxhallows]

Chris, werewolf or vampire au, you asking him to bite you for the first time while intimate. Anything else goes! 💜

I know you didn't ask for all dis but I felt inspired so thanks :) I picked vampire since most folx do wolfchris.

ᴛʜᴇ ᴄɪᴛʏ sʟᴇᴇᴘs [ ʙᴀɴɢᴄʜᴀɴ ᴠᴀᴍᴘɪʀᴇ ᴀᴜ x ғᴇᴍ!ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ ] ʀᴀᴛɪɴɢ: 𝟷𝟾+ ᴍᴀᴛᴜʀᴇ

ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢs: sᴍᴜᴛ, ᴠᴀᴍᴘɪʀᴇ!ᴄʜʀɪs, ᴅᴇᴀᴛʜ, ᴅᴇsᴄʀɪᴘᴛɪᴏɴs ᴏғ ɢᴏʀᴇ, ʀᴏʙʙᴇʀʏ, ᴇʀᴏᴛɪᴄ ʙʟᴏᴏᴅᴘʟᴀʏ ᴡᴏʀᴅ ᴄᴏᴜɴᴛ: 𝟺.𝟷ᴋ

In that blurred state between awake and asleep, an unsettling jolt shakes you into consciousness, as if you were dangling on the edge of a cliff. Startled, you awaken on the couch, yawning and taking in the surrounding darkness. The paused Netflix series, interrupted by the persistent question, "Are you still watching?" lingers on the screen.

To be honest, you had long lost interest in the show, drifting away to find solace in the soothing embrace of slumber. Your weary mind, burdened by the irrevocable sorrow of losing your closest friend, sought refuge in the realm of dreams. As you glance around the dimly illuminated living room, you remind yourself to tidy up the scattered clothes strewn across the floor. Empty water bottles have accumulated like forgotten relics on any available surface, accompanied by a disheveled pile of unwashed dishes, a task that feels insurmountable in your current state of apathy.

It’s been exactly twenty four days, ten hours, and six minutes since you saw Chan die right in front of your eyes.  Time becomes your tether, an illusion of control amidst the chaos that now engulfs you. In the prime of his youth, brimming with aspirations, Chan was snatched away too soon. The bond you forged in college carried you through the vibrant years of your twenties, but now, as you approach the threshold of thirty, he is painfully absent, no longer there to mock your aging despite being a mere year your junior.

Chan would give you endless advice about issues that now seemed to be so petty and irrelevant, and when texts weren’t enough at 12am, he would phone you to try to get you to relax and go to bed, promising to destroy you in a good ol’ game of mario kart the next day if you’d get some rest.  He was wrong, you always dominated in mario kart, but the competitive shit talking would effectively distract you, which was the whole point.  You’d hang up the phone feeling lighter somehow, as if he snatched the problems right from your shoulders and cast them into the skies.

In the realm of forbidden love, Chan possessed all the qualities that could make him the perfect boyfriend. But destiny had other plans, tying him to a five-year relationship while you were bound in a three-year commitment of your own. When your unfaithful partner betrayed you once more, Chan became your guiding light, reminding you of your worth just weeks before his tragic end. As friendship kindled into something more, an intense love grew within you, surpassing mere friendship. Respectful of his relationship, you kept your feelings in check, even though you didn't truly care for Chan's girlfriend. She transformed from a cheerleader to an OnlyFans personality, lacking the depth you believed Chan deserved. But who were you to decide his path? Despite their arguments, he found fragments of happiness with her... at least, when their love wasn't overshadowed by bitter fights every other week.

Tears welled up, spilling over your waterline, as thoughts of him consumed your mind once more. Desperate to escape the crushing weight of guilt that enveloped you, you sought distractions, attempting to forget that you blame yourself for his untimely departure. His family held you responsible too, believing that if only you hadn't taken those shortcuts through dimly lit alleys after your bowling night, the mugging would never have occurred. It was in that moment, face-to-face with a hooded figure, demanding your wallet, that Chan's selflessness emerged. Without hesitation, he confronted the assailant, triggering a violent response. The stranger swiftly plunged a blade into Chan's abdomen, tearing upward through his fragile organs before vanishing into the night.

As his lifeless body crumpled to the ground, blood staining his shirt and spreading with alarming speed, you were rendered utterly helpless, reduced to screams of despair. With trembling hands, you pressed against the wound, begging, pleading for him to stay, to hold on, your desperate pleas piercing the air as you cried out for help. A cook on a smoke break nearby heard your anguished cries and dialed for an ambulance. He handed you a grimy towel, urging you to apply more pressure, even as Chan slipped away, inch by agonizing inch.

"I... I think I'm... dying," he choked, blood seeping from the corners of his mouth, impeding his speech.

"No! You can't be dying! Don't you dare leave me, Chan! Don't you dare leave me like this!" you screamed, your voice strained and desperate.

He gasped, his lungs drowning in a sea of crimson. "I'm... sorry..."

Those were his last words before his body turned limp, the light extinguished from his eyes. You trembled uncontrollably, your body racked with violent sobs, cradling his lifeless form in your lap, willing him to awaken. It had to be a terrible nightmare, a cruel figment of your imagination. It couldn't be real...

Tears streaming down your face, you snatch a nearby mug and hurl it with all your might, watching it shatter against the wall. The sobs come pouring out, a torrent of frustration at the unfairness of life. How could it take away your best friend? You would have given the mugger everything you had, knowing that material possessions could be replaced, but not the irreplaceable bond you shared with Chan.

Without bothering to wipe your tear-stained cheeks, you rise unsteadily and stumble into the bathroom, flicking on the humming light above. The room comes alive, illuminating your trembling figure. In your hand, you clutch a bottle of newly prescribed psychiatric medication, its lid beckoning you to open it and plunge into a sea of pills. It's not the first, second, or even third time that you've contemplated consuming the entire bottle, escaping from this world altogether.

But then, as if echoing from the depths of your soul, you hear Chan's voice, a gentle reminder that pierces through the darkness.

‘Don’t be stupid, that won’t fix anything’

Taking a deep breath, you swallow the prescribed dose meant to help you weather the toughest storms. You tilt your head under the faucet, quenching your thirst as the water washes down the medication. With a swift motion, you turn off the tap and wipe your mouth with the side of your arm. Glancing briefly at your reflection in the mirror, you observe your disheveled appearance—a ponytail barely holding your hair in place, the emergence of weary bags under your eyes, a sight you've never witnessed before. The image worsens the pain within, reminding you of the toll this grief has taken. With a heavy heart, you exit the bathroom, your hand dragging along the light switch, plunging the room into darkness before retreating to the solace of your bedroom.

The bed lies in disarray, a nest of tangled sheets and blankets inviting you to seek solace within its embrace. Collapsing onto it, face first, you release a heavy sigh, shutting your eyes tightly, desperately wishing for a touch of magic to undo everything that has unfolded. Doubts persist, refusing to release their grip, leaving you questioning whether this reality is nothing more than a haunting nightmare or a cruel trance from which you are yet to awaken.

A tap at the window brushes against your senses, but you dismiss it as yet another figment of your restless imagination. The pills are beginning to take effect, gently lulling you into a peaceful slumber amidst the chaos of your bed. Another tap, insistent and persistent, echoes against the glass pane. Your mind races, reminding you that your apartment is situated on the fourth floor, rendering it impossible for anyone to be knocking on your window. Fear grips your heart, the notion of an intruder scaling your fire escape sending shivers down your spine. Instinctively, you lunge for your phone, intent on dialing emergency services.

"Don't do that!"

Time freezes as the unexpected voice reverberates through the room. Your finger hovers above the final digit of 9-1-1, your eyes darting up to the window. Darkness surrounds you, but the moon's radiant glow and the streetlights outside offer a faint illumination, revealing the silhouette standing before you, but the math still isn’t mathing for you yet.

“You’re not crazy, I promise.”

You feel yourself growing nauseated.  What type of sick psychosis is this? Was someone playing a trick on you?

“Let me in.”

Surely that voice sounds just like Chan, hell, the silhouette is lit enough for you to see the outline of his face, but your brain still can’t make sense of it.

“Y/N let me in and I can explain, but it still won’t make any fucking sense.  I didn’t have anywhere else to go just…please.”

His plea resonates deep within your being, compelling you to rush towards the window, swiftly unlatching it and pushing it open. Disbelief washes over you as you behold the figure before you. It's Chan, undoubtedly, from head to toe, but he's adorned in a suit that exudes an unmatched elegance, surpassing anything he ever wore in his human form.

"I must be going insane," you mutter, the words escaping your lips at last.

"No, you're not," he replies, his hands casually tucked into his pockets. Casting a glance around, he heaves a sigh. "Can I come in?"

Furrowing your brows, you find yourself utterly perplexed. “W-What the fuck is going on?”

"I can't enter unless you give me permission," he explains, his voice tinged with urgency. "And I can't explain it all out here. Just... tell me I can come in."

Your mouth opens, then closes. With guarded uncertainty, you finally utter the words that will forever alter the course of this enigmatic encounter. "You can come in."

"Finally," he murmurs, effortlessly climbing through your window. You watch in wide-eyed astonishment as he surveys your room. "Did a tornado sweep through here or something?"

Silence hangs heavy in the air as you remain rooted in place, your mouth slightly ajar. Chan settles on your bed, patting the space beside him. "Sorry, probably not the best timing for jokes right now."

"Are you some kind of ghost?" you stammer, desperately seeking an explanation for the inexplicable.

"You're incredibly stubborn, you know that?" he retorts, patting the bed insistently. "Just sit."

Reluctantly, you take a seat beside him, feeling a mix of curiosity and apprehension. He reaches out and clasps your hand in his own. It's chillingly cold, like grasping an ice pack pulled from the freezer. Startled, you snatch your hand back, inching away from him.  “What the fuck is going on?”

"I'm still trying to figure that out," he admits, tilting his head slightly and hooking his index finger under his lower lip, revealing a lengthened fang that stands out amidst his otherwise perfect teeth.

"You've got to be kidding me, Chan," you exclaim, struggling to believe your eyes. "Are you... Are you a..." The word hangs on the tip of your tongue, too unbelievable to utter.

"A vampire?" he finishes your sentence, his voice tinged with a strange mix of resignation and disbelief. "I wouldn't believe it myself if I hadn't woken up in the crematorium, lying on an examination table."

He looks down at his hands, as if seeing them for the first time.  “The mortician came in once he heard me freaking out.  He was so calm, it was scary.  He handed me these clothes, and told me I had a second chance.”

As you listen to his words, the medication begins to take effect, both soothing and disorienting you. Part of you believes that this must be a dream, a hallucination that will fade away upon waking. "Vampires... they're real?" you mumble, the words feeling unreal on your tongue.

"The mortician, the one who took care of me after... after that night, he turned me," Chan explains. "He told me there are others like us, vampires, including the lead cardiovascular surgeon at Greatview Hospital and many more scattered across the country."

You freeze, your eyes scanning his figure intently. "No," you utter, rising to your feet. "No, this can't be true." You repeat the words, trying to convince yourself that you're experiencing a psychotic episode, a figment of your traumatized mind. "I saw you die in my arms."

"I remember," Chan replies gently, his voice now softer and more reassuring. Your guard momentarily falters, accustomed to finding solace in his voice. “Look, I haven’t shown myself to anyone.  Not my parents, friends, anybody.  I didn’t know where to go, so I came here.”

“I still can’t believe this.  I took my meds and I’m hallucinating.” 

Chan raises an eyebrow at the mention of medication. “Meds? Since when are you on medication? For what?”

You stretch out your hands in front of you, gesturing dramatically towards the undead being standing before you. "I watched you die!"

"Can you please stop reminding me?" Chan pleads, sighing and rising from the bed. You instinctively take a step back, then another, and another.  “I get it, this is really fucking weird, but I’m trying to figure it out too, and you’re the only one I can trust to help me sort through this.  Please,” He walks towards you and you take another step back, and another, and another.  Chan’s eyes were pleading, and even as a human, you had never seen him so desperate.  It was pulling at you in ways you couldn’t understand.  “Help me?”

Your back meets the wall, and you find yourself mere inches away from him, lost in his familiar comforting gaze. Perhaps it's the medication surging through your system or the undeniable connection you share, but your fear begins to dissipate, replaced by an inexplicable pull towards him.

"Okay," you whisper, surrendering to the magnetism drawing you closer.

In that instant, he closes the remaining distance, pressing his body against yours, and his lips meet yours in a kiss that defies all expectations. This is nothing like the countless times you've imagined your first kiss with Chan.  Despite the unnatural circumstances surrounding him, he is here, in your room, kissing you with lips colder than anything you've ever experienced.   Chan was cold like ski vacations that turn into arctic nights with blinding blizzards.  He was cold like making snow angels in the remotest sundries of Antarctica.  And yet, against your heated warmth, it melded and melted you into a dizziness that made you wonder how someone could kiss you like this.  His scent evokes the desperate burning of cedar by humans seeking warmth to survive. He doesn't breathe, his stillness reminiscent of being stranded in the untouched frozen tundra. His taste is like the hidden depths of an iceberg lurking beneath the surface of the sea.  Surely humans weren’t capable of such otherworldly capture of the senses in these inexplicable ways.

He lifts you effortlessly, your legs securely wrapping around his waist, as his hand finds support on the wall. With graceful precision, he lowers you down the wall, gently laying you on the floor, making you feel weightless like a delicate dove feather. His lips part slightly, revealing the tips of his sharp teeth just beneath his pale, plush upper lip. You're captivated by the deliberate way he undoes his watch, letting it fall with a thud on the carpet alongside his jacket. His focus on undressing himself is almost ritualistic, as he meticulously undoes each cuff of his sleeves. Was he always like this, or did the blood of his maker course through his veins, influencing his every move?  The man above you existed twenty four days, twelve hours, and forty six minutes ago, yet he carries the essence of centuries within him.

“Have you drank blood yet?” you manage to breathe, your gaze fixed on his fingers skillfully unbuttoning his shirt. The question momentarily halts his actions, his eyes still locked on the task at hand. It's a brief pause, lasting only a second or two, before he resumes, his gaze now locked with yours.

“I haven’t bitten anyone.”

“That’s not what I asked.”

“That’s what you meant, though, right?”

He looks down again, pulling his shirt from his slacks, the last button falling and revealing his sculpted shoulders as he works on his belt. Your heart races in your chest, the earlier ease dissipating. How did he know? You and Chan shared a deep connection, but it's as if he just read your thoughts without even glancing at your face. As your eyes follow his gaze to the golden, slender belt buckle, you can't help but notice the undeniable hardness that tents the front of his pants.

"The mortician who turned me... he said I'm not ready," Chan reveals, swiftly removing his belt in one fluid motion. Feeling the electricity in the air, you take charge and unbutton his pants, stealing the spotlight for yourself. "Your heartbeat fills my ears, it's so loud. I've been trying to ignore it this whole time, but it's like a pulsating drumbeat," he admits, his relief palpable as his hardness finds release, causing his head to tilt back. It's not just the longing he has harbored for being this close to you, although that's a significant part—it's the way you look at him, the way your pulse quickens, the hitch in your breath—it all makes him crave you, body and soul. He wants to devour you, if he's being completely honest. So he counts the seconds it takes to undo his cuffs, the buttons lining his shirt, hoping to distract himself from the thirst welling up in his mouth that he keeps swallowing.

"A drumbeat," you echo, your voice trembling. "But don't you love music?"

"I do," he replies.

"I thought you couldn't live without music."

"I can't."

"Then... we're okay, right?" you inquire, your hand running along the length of his hardened desire, the cool fabric of his briefs the only barrier between you and its icy touch. Your gaze never wavers from his, a silent plea for reassurance. You want to see the Chan who died protecting you; the Chan who would vanquish this version of himself, even if it meant embarking on a fool's mission.

"You won't hurt me, will you?"

He may not require breath for survival, but the sensation of your touch makes his breath audible, escaping in short, jagged gasps that his teeth can barely contain. You can see it, and you can hear it—the rhythm of his breath intertwined with the flex of his firm muscles, like woven iron beneath his pale, milky skin.

"I could never hurt you," Chan professes, his words laden with sincerity, yet tinged with a sense of unease. He wonders if he can truly bear the weight of that promise, given his newfound struggle with self-control. He captures your lips once more, as you navigate his briefs in a hurried frenzy, responding to his kiss with a fiery intensity. You strive to avoid his fangs, the smooth ivory points that pose a dangerous threat against your swollen lips. Your breath becomes heavy against his mouth as you feel him pressing against your entrance, teasing you with deliberate strokes, spreading slickness and igniting electric shocks throughout your body. Each tiny quiver you make when he brushes past your sensitive clit only serves to undermine his initial plan of taking things slow. Plan A was to resist giving in to desire, but that failed, so Plan B was to proceed with caution. And yet, you were compelling him to venture further down the alphabet until he had exhausted all his options.

Curiosity overtakes you, and you tentatively reach up to touch the tip of his fang, a tad too eagerly, causing your finger to prick. Your reflex pulls away, but before you can retreat an inch, he thrusts inside you and firmly clasps your wrist, bringing it to his lips. It startles you; you've never seen him move so swiftly, almost as if he had teleported. There's no escaping his cold vice grip, and fear grips your heart. You want to protest, to plead for your life, but the words elude you when he fills you completely, his strokes caressing your most sensitive spots again and again. He takes your finger into his mouth, his tongue lapping at the wound, cleansing the blood. In that moment, you sense a shared eroticism, amplifying his pleasure in a primal manner.

He must be on Plan D or E by now, but all semblance of order dissipates when you moan his name and rake your nails down his chest. "Please, bite me. Pretty please? God, I just... I need to feel you—"

Chan's body hovers over yours, his cheek pressing against yours. “Stop begging me like that–”

"Or what?" you challenge, your back arching, breasts pressing into him as your bodies move in sync and he ruts into you. The pace slows, intensifying the sensation, pushing you closer to the edge. It's like a row of slot machines aligning at the casino, anticipation building, and you're on the verge of breaking, so close, incredibly close.

“Shi–you’re such a fucking brat–” Chan huffs against your neck, taking in your scent.  It was like blueberries grown in the sunshine were in a basket underneath your skin.  He knew exactly where each vessel ran.  He could tell the difference between the pace of your veins and the race of your arteries.  Each stroke inside you sets his fangs throbbing with need, and soft, guttural groans escape him as he tightens his grip on your hair, propelling both of you towards the precipice.

"Chan..." You try to utter his name, attempting to warn him, to give him a heads up, but words fail you. You're reduced to incoherent babbling, your body spasming and your toes curling. Chan curses into your skin as his sharp teeth break the surface, sinking into your shoulder. He can't halt the inevitable rush of his bite, but he steers clear of major arteries. Regrettably, the bite is deeper than intended, its edges jagged. Once he withdraws his fangs, you feel the warm flow of your own blood cascading down your shoulder. The area quickly goes numb, sending tingling shivers coursing through your body, catching you off guard and propelling you into another climax. It's an unexpected surge of pleasure, enveloping you completely. You've witnessed stars in moments of intimacy before, but now your vision becomes veiled in ethereal auras, akin to cumulus clouds bringing tempestuous weather directly into your bedroom.

Chan's mind goes blank, his instincts taking over as he sensually licks your breast, tracing a path up your collarbone, and back to the healing wound where his hunger led to the mingling of his own blood with yours. Within seconds of savoring your life force, he’s filling you up, his dick buried inside of you as he pulls your hips harder and lets out a broken moan of release. The pleasure tears him away from his consuming desire to drink from you, his hips jerking as he empties himself inside you.

Finally able to catch your breath, you realize he was like oxygen, taking you to another world, albeit a temporary escape. But now, the metallic scent of blood brings you back to reality, a reminder of the way he ravaged your shoulder earlier. The carpet beneath you is damp and sticky, soaked with spilled blood. However, as you touch the area, there's no evidence of the incident on your skin.

"I think it's gone," Chan helps you sit up on the floor, examining the spot on your upper back. True enough, it's smooth, the dried stain of blood serving as the only reminder. "I don't know how, but it's gone."

You touch the area in disbelief. "Wow, it's like it never happened," you say, struggling to recall the intensity of the bite. Concerned for Chan, you ask him if he's okay, considering the overwhelming experience you both just shared.

Chan's expression turns uneasy, his attention abruptly drawn to the window. Confusion and worry cloud his features. "I think... I think I have to go," he stammers, hastily retrieving his clothes and dressing himself as if compelled by an unseen force. He buckles his pants, hurriedly pulls on his shirt, and stumbles toward the window, his actions urgent. You panic and follow after him.

“What’s happening?!”

"I... I don't know. I think I have to go. I just..." Chan collapses to the ground, clutching his ears, crying out in pain as images of the crematorium flash through his mind's eye. "I'll come back another time," he manages to say, raising the window, and in an instant, he's out and down the fire escape, disappearing into the whispers of the city winds.

[an-indecisive-nerd]

As I promised to some of you lovely people, here's a brief (it's not at all brief I apologize) introduction to the gods of my world.

All the gods of my world are related, they are all part of the Alarie family. Here I'll be giving some basic info about each member (minus the ones that aren't gods), then I'll follow up with individual character introductions assuming it wouldn't spoil anything.

Universe

The goddess of the universe and creation, she is the original God and the matriarch of the Alarie family. Her real name is Ellowyn.

She's a very kind and nurturing soul, and a wonderful mother. She loves all her creations and is very happy with the universe she's created. She's also in charge of Heaven.

- Preferred form: female

- Domains: Creation, Heaven, existence as a whole

- Followers' robe colour: N/A

- Accent: Italian

Chaos

God of chaos and destruction. He's Ellowyn's husband and his real name is Casimir.

His entire goal in life is pretty much just to stir shit up for no reason, and he never fails to do just that. He sometimes goes a little too far and has to be trapped in the core of a planet for a century or two to cool off.

- Preferred form: Either

- Domains: Destruction, chaos, the end of everything, black holes, hell

- Followers robe colour: N/A

- Accent: Scottish

Darkness

Cas and Ellowyn's first born son, he's the oldest the second generation of gods, though when they’re discussed he's usually listed last. His real name is Caliban.

The second generation onwards of gods are the ones that actually take on specific followers, but of all of them Caliban takes on the least. He tends to be considered the loner of the family, and his manner can seem very calculated and cold to most. It's never clear what he's planning.

- Preferred form: Either

- Domains: Darkness, power, ambition, strategy, evil (in certain regions), cold, night

- Followers robe colour: Black

- Accent: Canadian

Sun

The second child of Ellowyn and Cas, she became the ruler of the gods after Caliban abdicated the throne. Her real name is Ravindra.

Ravi has a lot of responsibilities as ruler of the gods, and thus tends to be a workaholic. As a god more responsibilities means more power though, so she's also quite arrogant and proud. Underneath that arrogant shell though is a woman who deeply cares for her family and would do anything to protect them.

- Preferred form: Female (uses male form more often because of {spoilers})

- Domains: The sun, Honesty, Clarity, wisdom, Knowledge, leadership, light, purity, revenge, etc. Etc. Etc.

- Followers robe colour: Yellow

- Accent: Indian

Moon

Goddess of the Moon, third child of Ellowyn and Cas. Her real name is Esmeray.

Esmeray tends to be a passive observer of the events of the universe. Or at least, that's what it looks like. In reality, Esmeray is the goddess of prophecy, and she's constantly working to make sure her universe goes in the right direction, using gentle nudges that even the other gods don't notice. She inherited a healthy love of chaos from Cas, so she does occasionally use this power for mischief, but she always has good intentions.

- Preferred form: female

- Domains: the Moon, prophecy, illusions, lies, sleep, blindness

- Followers robe colour: purple

- Accent: Stereotypical valley girl

Air

Air god, fourth child, real name is Audra

Audra, fittingly, is a wanderer and a free spirit. They struggle with taking things seriously, and there's not much that can bring the air God down. The downside? They can be a bit of an airhead.

- Preferred form: Either (they switch forms constantly, rarely staying in the same form longer than an hour)

- Domains: Air, freedom, creativity, traveling parties, indecisiveness, drugs

- Followers robe colours: Light blue

- Accent: Boston

Earth

Fifth child, her real name is Adamina.

Adamina is a very kind woman. She's the goddess of nature and motherhood and as such she practically adopts all of her followers. She has many children of her own, so many in fact that they can't be made into gods and have to be content with basic immortality.

- Preferred form: Female (never switches)

- Domains: Earth, nature, animals, plants motherhood, marriage, peace, kindness

- Followers robe colour: Green

- Accent: Australian

Love

Sixth child, real name is Cerys. He has the most... eclectic set of powers.

Cerys is the black sheep of the Alarie family. He used to be the God of prophecy as well as love, and disappeared shortly before a major event because of a vision he had. Usually in order to do this you have to give up your God powers, but Cerys somehow found a way to retain most of them, only giving away a few to throw people off. He seems like a rather simple man, friendly and sweet, your stereotypical kind love god. However if you suspect there may be more to him than that, you wouldn't be the first...

- Preferred form: Depends

- Domains: Love, time, passion (non-sexual), poetry, {spoilers}

- Followers robe colour: N/A

- Accent: Ukrainian

Fire

Seventh child, real name Cyra.

Cyra is charming and polite, but also reckless and a bit dim. He's quick to anger and can be aggressive, but it's not too difficult to calm him down.

- Preferred form: Either

- Domains: Fire, change, passion (sexual), warmth, war, aggression, obsession, forging

- Followers robe colour: Red

- Accent: Southern

Water

Cyra's younger twin sister, real name Rayan.

Rayan tends to be very laid back and go with the flow. She's very accepting of people and rather calm in general. The exception is that she is a god of jealousy. She protests all her siblings' relationships, particularly Cyra's, and tries to convince them to break up often. Other than that she’s chill.

- Preferred form: Whichever one Cyra's not using

- Domains: Water, adaptability, acceptance, jealousy, emotions

- Followers robe colour: Dark blue

- Accent: Greek

Life

Life is the first of the third generation and is Ravi's adopted child. I can't reveal his name because spoilers

Life works a lot, much like his mother, and he also has her proud streak. He has a passion for experiments, which is why creatures like the platypus exist. Most of the time when asked about his work he'll respond with something along the lines of "You wouldn't get it", but if he thinks there's a chance that you would get it and you do manage to get him talking about it, he'll ramble on for hours, saying a million words per minute in the hopes of being able to discuss all his ideas before you shut him down.

- Preferred form: Male

- Domains: Life, healing, beauty, souls

- Followers robe colours: N/A

- Accent: Ancient roman

Death

This one is considered the adopted child of Caliban. Once again I can't reveal her name because spoilers.

Death is quite reserved. She’s very compassionate and does her best to ease good people's passing. She enjoys being able to bring justice to those who were cruel. She’s often seen as the gods' scapegoat, because she has many of the domains that are generally considered bad. Don't feel bad for her though, she signed up for this role. Why? Even the gods aren't sure.

- Preferred form: Either

- Domains: Death, pain, suffering, paranoia, madness, loss, grief, torture, being trapped, chains, etc.

- Followers robe colours: burgundy

- Accent: British

And that is finally all the gods. I'm so sorry.

@pheonix358 @unforgettable-sensations @littleladymab

@satohqbanana @megamijadeheart @my-bright-legacy

@thecomfywriter @wyked-ao3 @ominous-feychild

[dangermousie]

Happy Ending for these two, after the drama drank gallons of my blood.

I am so relieved, I don't even care about the fact that he's got amnesia TWICE (I wonder if initial bout was due to extension) or the fact that surely the survivors of the army sent to take him down would have given away to someone in authority that Yeon Jun basically let him get away (or that Gil Chae seems to have forgotten about her mad father and little brother utterly.)

This writer does have a (welcome to me) tendency to go for happy endings that may not be realistic but feel welcome in fictional contexts. Rebel was a marvel of a drama but its very happy ending felt incredibly unrealistic - the horrifying ending of Hong Sisters' Hong Gil Dong felt a lot more likely for that type of story. And the same is true here - a tragic ending would have been a lot more likely. But being spared this feels wonderful. (And now we know what those voiceovers are about - it's her telling him about their past, so at to help fill memory gaps.)

Ultimately, this drama had its flaws unlike e.g., Chuno, which for me was flawless, but most of it was amazing, amazing, amazing.

A couple of non-ship things I loved: the resolution of Yeon Jun's story. I know most people didn't like his character and I can't say I'd want him as a friend or a family member, but it was a fascinating arc for someone who was a lot more in line with a "proper" aristocrat of his time, and honestly his story would have made a fascinating 19th century psychological novel. He has finally learned to see grey and go against the norms and it almost drove him to kill himself and - it was a very interesting character and story to me. But oh boy, did Gil Chae dodge a bullet in switching her affections back way when!

The story with Jang Hyun's father was exactly as expected and yet I was still taken aback by the petty horror of it all. The old man killed his whole family (or so he thought) for illusory fame and when given a chance to redo, chose to do the same thing again. Realistic. And none of it even made him happy - hence the suicide - but illusions of what he is to the rest must be maintained. JH's face as he said he now knows the most precious thing to the old man wasn't him.

You know what made me cackle in demented glee? Injo's end. Calling for the son he ruined, whose death he caused, whose loved ones he exterminated (his wife, his sons, the people the prince cared for.) Interesting parallel with the Crown Princess' death btw - when she calls for So Hyun, she sees him come for her and there is light and peace. Injo's calls are unanswered and there is no light just darkness. The tragedy is that he actually loved his son as much as a monster like him could. It just wasn't any salvation to anyone.

Just as Jang Hyun's father, he chose terror and "reputation" over his own child and their punishment is to die in despair, alone.

In conclusion, this was an amazing drama, with amazing performances, and only narrowly misses being my favorite kdrama of 2023 (and if either GK War or Moon in the Day implode, might still win.)

ETA: loved that they didn't end back in her hometown, because they didn't need to. They are each other's hometown, are they not?

[coraniaid]

Buffy for the character asks?

General opinion/how much I care about them:  What can I say about Buffy Summers? When she was fifteen years old a representative of an ancient mystical order told her that she alone had the power to stop bad things from happening in the world, thereby confirming something she had hitherto only strongly suspected.  She had to keep a fundamental part of her life secret from the world for years but she never learned how to tell a convincing lie because she was too busy thinking up puns.  She had a 95th percentile SAT score despite mostly studying in between fighting vampires in a cemetery every night and cutting classes to sneak out of school and fight yet more vampires during the day.   All her favorite teachers died or never noticed she existed.  She is both a quintessential only child and somebody who would fight a god to save her annoying little sister.  She blackmailed the management of a fast food chain so that they would let her keep doing a minimum wage job she hated with co-workers whose last names she can’t remember.  She burned down her old high school gym and blamed it on mice and blew up her new high school library while she was at her graduation ceremony and she sunk her hometown into a giant hole in the desert and drove away in a school bus.  She died twice before she turned twenty-one.  She is one of my favorite fictional characters in any medium.

A ship I love: I didn’t really talk about why I love Fuffy in my Faith answer, so let me try now.

Of all of Buffy’s shadow selves, Faith is the one who spends the most time actually in her shadow.  She doesn’t get later character development that takes her in a different direction and makes her her own person; she didn’t start out as something else entirely and get reworked later when the plot required it.  She doesn’t even get the illusion of a family and moments of happiness, like Drusilla has in Season 2.  When Faith’s not hanging out with Buffy she’s sitting alone in her motel room or lying in a coma or counting down the months in jail.  She exists to be a version of Buffy who is not Buffy, who is worse than Buffy, who doesn’t have friends or family or any external support.  That’s really all she is.  And she knows it.  And she hates it.  How could she not?  “You get the Watcher, you get the Mom, you get the little Scooby gang … what do I get?”

Because Faith is Buffy – the part of Buffy who never came back after she ran away from home and got kicked out of school; the part who can admit to craving a little more than low-fat yogurt after a night patrolling; the part that never got to make friends with Xander and Willow in Season 1 and never had a Watcher who cared about her –  so on a fundamental level Fuffy is about Buffy accepting those suppressed and hidden angry parts of herself.  But it’s also about Faith accepting the forgotten and ignored parts of herself that are present in Buffy: the idea that she can be a hero, that there are people in the world who care about her, that there are people who she can trust.  It’s about asking what if all of the Season 3 subtext – Faith’s whole arc this season paralleling Angel’s a year ago, and “what are friends for?” and “It’s kind of a Slayer thing”, and Joyce marching in the Slayer Pride Parade – was text, and what if the show existed in a world where the characters could act on it?

And because of how Season 3 turns out, it’s also about Buffy and Faith forgiving themselves, and each other, for doing almost unforgivable things to each other.  Because there were never meant to be two of them, and they’ve never been able to tell each other what they mean, and because “kill me, you become me”, but she tried and it didn’t help.  And it’s about crappy presents and knives to the throat and forehead kisses and shared dreams and hopelessly entangled destinies.  It’s ”She could be terrified.  Maybe [...] she’s sorry and she’s alone” and “You think you matter, you think you’re a part of something, and then you get dumped” and “All my life there was one person who tried to be my friend” and “I tried so hard to help you and you spat on me” and “Willow said you needed me.�� Didn’t really give it much thought.”

As much as I wish Faith was in Season 7 more, part of me is glad that this is all we got, because I really don’t think the show could ever have done all this justice. And the little we get is enough to make me a bit crazy.

A non-romantic relationship that I love: I already talked about Buffy and Willow, so I will try to subvert expectations a little here and go with Buffy and Giles.  Not the fandom version of their relationship I like to complain about where Giles is an uncomplicated Good Dad, but the messy and complicated and heartbreaking version where he just won’t allow himself to be that person.  

I mean, I think it’s very clear from the show that Giles really does care about Buffy far beyond the extent he is supposed to as a Watcher (he tries to go and fight the Master in her place! Even though he knows it would kill him!  Even though this is Season 1 of the show and we’ve not yet seen Giles fight a single vampire!) but that everything about his training and his past tells him that he shouldn’t.  Buffy cares about Giles a lot (“You can’t leave me, I can’t do this alone” / “it’s a little like having Mom back”) and it’s clear that she would really like Giles to be more involved in her life (she wants her Mom to invite him around for Christmas, she goes to his house for Thanksgiving, she tries so hard not to show how hurt she is when she confuses his attempts to be dispassionate with genuine disinterest) but Giles is convinced that he cannot be that sort of parental figure for Buffy and it would only hurt her if he tried, and so – by purposely distancing himself from her and not letting her get close to him– he ends up hurting her in exactly the way he fears.

And the tragedy is that I think Giles really does believe the line he keeps feeding Buffy about how important it is not to be “distracted” by “personal concerns”.  When Quentin Travers told him he had “a father’s love” for Buffy, Travers meant it as a rebuke – and that’s exactly how Giles takes it.  He thinks getting closer to Buffy would be bad for her!  He thinks by leaving her in Season 6 he is helping her become self-reliant and a better Slayer!  Of course he is wrong, but that’s what he thinks, and it is consistent with how he’s always thought.  It’s not character assassination or some unjust subversion of his previously established personality: it is a natural and predictable and awful thing for him to do.  And he does it because he cares about her and doesn’t know what to do about that!  He thinks she’s a much better person than he is (“she’s a hero, you see.  She’s not like us”) and he doesn’t want to bring her down to his level!  “If you care so much about [these people], why didn’t you leave town?” Ethan asked him in The Dark Age, and Giles didn’t have an answer!

The NOTP: Going to cheat a bit here (honestly, mostly because it feels a bit mean to keep picking on Xander at this point), and say that the ship I don’t like isn’t with a specific person but rather with an idea that I see applied to all sorts of ships.  Namely the idea – not supported at all by the text – that Buffy’s various romantic interests are Good People who teach Buffy important life lessons and make her a better person or protect her from the dangerous world around her.  I mean, sorry, but this is not how it works! This is a boring fantasy you have projected onto the show in place of what it was actually telling you.  The feminism of BtVS is paper-thin, but give it some credit!

In canon, Buffy absolutely does not learn from her boyfriends.  She does not rely on them for emotional support.  They all cause her more problems than they help her.  She rescues them.  She makes them better.  Honestly her boyfriends all kind of suck.  Because that’s her type!  She likes losers with no friends who are kind of obsessed about Buffy Summers! (Losers just like Faith!)

Buffy textually hates it when Angel talks down to her: we see repeatedly how furious she gets when he treats her “like a kid” or makes important decisions about their relationship on her behalf.  She doesn't mind physically upstaging Riley (“I was holding back a little”) and secretly likes it when he gets hurt because, to quote Dawn, “she says you look even cuter when you’re all weak and kitteny”. The iconic twin shots of Spike and Buffy in The Gift and After Life are deliberately staged so that Spike is looking up the stairs at Buffy and she is looking down at him (“you’re beneath me”, as she told him in Fool For Love).  And as she says later in Conversations With Dead People:  “Their opinions don’t matter.  They don’t know.  They haven’t been through what I’ve been through [...] I feel like I’m better than them.  Superior.”

So, you know, the preferred power balance is pretty explicit here! I don’t think the show is being excessively subtle. And yet people keep insisting that, oh no, Buffy learns a lot from her boyfriends, or that she can’t possibly cope without their support, or writing fanfics where they swoop in to town to rescue Buffy from trouble. But that is not who Buffy is!  She is not some unsophisticated naif or damsel in distress.  She would hate that so much!  Ship Buffy with whoever you want, but let her be Buffy!

… but also, yeah, rewatching the second season really reminded me how awful I’d have found Buffy/Xander and how glad I am that the show stops hinting at that after Becoming.  Sorry, Xander.  You can take solace in being … well, a loser with friends?

My biggest headcanon about them:  Some time after Chosen Buffy definitely goes back to college and gets that English degree she deserves.  I don’t want to think about Buffy living in a gloomy castle in Scotland and still being forever isolated from the world or about her becoming a cop with superpowers or whatever other nonsense the comics insist happens to her after the show ends.  I want her to be able to have some time off and read some poetry and make Willow jealous academically.

An idea for a fanfiction I would like to write/read about them: One day I will finish my Season 7 rewrite in which Drusilla is the Big Bad and Faith gets broken out of prison earlier and Amy and Willow get to have a proper resolution and Kennedy is another Slayer from the start and Marcie and Ethan come back for cameos and people remember that Jesse and Kendra ever existed and Dawn actually gets something to do.  But first I will probably have to start writing it.

Something that makes me think of them: Nothing makes me think of Buffy.  I choose to be like this (for some reason).

[blackholesun321]

oh i never said we had to LEAVE the angst we just need a small palette cleanser

that being said… do you think sabo ever enjoyed preening until he met ace? or did he view it as something at first he needs to do in order to keep up the illusion that he is happy and then it just turns into something to keep the itchiness of poor preening at bay

does ace know enough about preening to be gentle? the bandits seem more of a ‘tough love’ type and i think that might transfer to preening, not out of malice but just out of nature

and when you are a rough mountain bandit you aren’t generally all that well versed in such things as being soft, caring, or generally good for the upbringing of infants. yea sure you can keep the thing /alive\ but it wont be pretty and when the kid seems content to run off on his own and only come back when you send out a goon to hunt him down so the terrifying marine who dropped the brat on your doorstep doesn’t arrest you? well whos gonna say no to that?

Nobles, as a given, will, in every chance and at every opportunity, refuse to do something if someone else can do it. To preen one’s feathers or someone else is considered a degrading thing, and children grow up in this environment, starved of emotional contact aside from maids and servants who clean and oil, pull molting, or, perish the thought, broken feathers from their wings. Preening, to Sabo, is a cold, distant thing. He has no context for flock bonding, aside from the medical aspects taught from tutors. He only learned to do it on his own so he didn’t have to rely on anyone, even the servants in his household, before he left.

Ace has never had a gentle hand to hold him his whole life. Dadan tries, but she wasn’t made for the soft down of children’s wings. She helped as much as she could, but then Ace came to her at six years old, already the angriest child she’d ever known, and told her to, in his words, "fuck off" when she tried to preen him for the night. The next day, she handed him supplies for self-preening and told him to come back and ask for more if he ran out or lost shit. Ace learns from a young age that preening is something to be worked through, like brushing your teeth or taking a bath. It is a chore, and the one and only time he decided to approach the bandit preening circle, he had healthy feathers pulled out, whether from inexperience with fledgling down or malice. Ace vows never again and, from then on, became as self-sufficient as he could when it came to his wings. It doesn’t stop his wings from looking like a horror show. Sure, they’re clean and oiled regularly, but still as wild and untamed as you would expect from a forest child.

Ace knows what bonding is from an outsider's point of view, but he's never experienced it, aside from Garp trying to shove his own pristine white feathers into his black and orange down. Sabo, aside from the medical knowledge of bonding, has no reference points for social activities that involve building a flock. They bond anyway; instincts are not so easily overcome. They give presents and shiny things they’ve found, help each other hunt, and give away choice pieces of food. They help build each other's nests, but they don’t touch each other's wings. Sabo still burns or buries or destroys his molted or broken feathers (as a noble, all feathers were destroyed immediately upon molting; you couldn’t have a rival family giving your feathers to wear in someone else's wings or hair. Blackmail for societal pofa or assumed incompetence were and is very powerful thing). Ace still leaves his scattered across the forest floor. They stick to themselves and their routines until that is, Luffy arrives.

This small ball of white and black and green and red down who wears others' feathers in clothes on his hat and braided in his hair and wings without a care. He takes Dadan's molted feathers and makes them into a crown for himself. He has a bright red flight feather, lacquered for longevity, and kept safe in a box, but sometimes he'll attach it to his hat. He gives beetles and seashells out like smiles and is always willing to add more to his own collection. He even once grabs Ace's wing to fix a twisted, newly grown flight feather and gets punched for his efforts.

He's annoying, alien in his mannerisms and completely, utterly impossible to get rid of. They hate him for every uncomfortable thing he represents and every small feather he collects to hold out for them to take. He twists something in them, something raw and wanting, empty they never knew existed. And then Porkami happens, and they see this small, flightless, bloody fledgling willing to die for them, smiling even as they undo the ropes holding him up. Even as they slowly nurse him back to health, one day at a time, and he still offers them the newly broken feathers from his useless wing. That hollowness snaps, and Ace and Sabo, gently, ever so gently, slide those feathers into their own ruffled down and feel themselves becoming a little more, something that feels like whole.

[ailendolin]

Live Reaction to TRoP 2x07

I'd like to start off this week's reaction by saying that I am terrified because of what's probably going to happen but also can't wait to finally see Elrond again. So let's see how much of an emotional mess I will be in an hour. Brace for heartbreak.

we're starting with a peaceful Eregion so we're back in Sauron's vision of it. I'm already not liking this

Celebrimbor, enjoying the sunshine and having a break. Oh if only it were real. He looks so terribly exhausted

omg not him talking to the mouse! This is the cutest thing ever and it's making me tear up. This man is so full of kindness and love and I just want to wrap him up in a blanket and keep him safe

oh the confusion is so painful to watch. "You know how forgetful you can be." Fuck you, Annatar. I cannot wait to see Celebrimbor throw the stupid hammer at you (and I know there is a universe out there where he doesn't miss ...)

can I just quickly give a shout out to Charlie Edwards? Because this wide-eyed, almost childish innocence on Celebrimbor's face is absolutely tearing at my heart. What an actor

"All things must end." I hate that you can see on Annatar's face that he has already decided to kill him

oh shit, Eregion is not doing well. Adar is not messing about

Malendol! I have missed you! I know barely anyone cares about you but I do!

"Gather your finest troupes." He's going to eliminate them, isn't he?

lol Annatar once again not happy to be touched by Mirdania

no, Malendol, you shall not cross the river because there won't be a river in a few moments

this is such a cool sequence btw

Arondir! Yes! We need you!

aw the little mouse is back. It's so sad that it is Celebrimbor's only company now

and we're back in Khazad-Dûm. Durin III is still hoarding gold, I see, and growing more and more desperate for more. His fall into insanity is almost as painful to watch as Celebrimbor's

Disa is not here to mess around. She's here to fuck shit up and I love her for it

oh thank Aule Narvi has some common sense left

aaaaaah it is Elrond! Elrond is at the door! Finally my favourite found family in the show is reunited! Oh I am so happy right now!

"My heart sings to see you, old friend." Elrond, my heart sings to see you too - even if you look absolutely exhausted.

I feel like this is the first time we have seen him smile this season

"I'm about to overthrow my father." You can just see how much this weighs on Elrond. And the fact that he does not even mention the rings, the waterfall, the betrayal and just focuses on defeat ... as if none of it really matters in the face of battle. Let me hug you, Elrond

"I need your axe, old friend." I love this so much

the way those elves flinched when one of them was shot. Gods, they lived such a protective life in Eregion this whole time, didn't they? And now there is this overwhelming force before them and they're trying, they are, but they're not enough

I'm sorry but Annatar gathering up his robes every time he has to use stairs is so freaking hilarious

Annatar, I swear, if you hurt that mouse ...

oh shit, Celebrimbor is on to him! He's seeing through the illusion!

this makes me wonder - how many days, weeks, months has he been stuck in that time loop? How alone has he truly been, and for how long?

and there flies the hammer! And it breaks the illusion

why has Celebrimbor blood on his face? I am not okay with this. What happened to him?

oh god it's the destruction of his city that is making him break down. That scene from the trailer has haunted me for weeks now and it's even more heart-breaking to see it in context

fuck no! The mithril was his blood? Why did I not see this coming?

this is framed the same way as the vision where children were running around and everyone was happy, isn't it?

nooooo he did not get hit right now, did he? Has this man not been through enough? (I know the answer to that is no, at least according to Annatar)

Mirdania, why the fuck are you just standing around and doing nothing? Make yourself useful, girl! Help the wounded! Pick up a bow! Do something!

her reaction to Celebrimbor's plea is that, "It's all right, grandpa" meme and ugh, she is making it very hard right now to like her

Malendol, I forgive you for not believing Celebrimbor because you have not been in the tower with him and only have known Annatar's word. But Mirdania? You should know better

oh fuck you, Sauron, for turning your blood red

omg I was just thinking someone should push Mirdania over the wall so, uh ... thank you, Annatar? Gods, I feel awful now. So much for rewarding her when the time comes, huh? She did not deserve this

oh shit she's still alive? Damn, this is cruel

oooooooh is this Elrond to the rescue? Fuck yes it is! And Rían is with him! And Gil-galad! Finally, Gil-galad listened to him!

omg the charge looks so cool!

noooooo they're not putting Galadriel in the cage on the front lines. I can't. Well played, Adar, well played

aw no, Elrond, don't falter. But that shot of Lindon's army standing opposite of Adar's? I want that as a print. This is gorgeous

oh hello Vorohil! I have missed you!

"You cannot save him." This is awful considering of the prophecy about Celebrimbor's life lying in Elrond's hands

oh, so Adar knew Melian? That's interesting

Elrond, I love you! Turning the Uruks against Adar is so clever

okay, so that kiss happened, huh? I hope we're all agreeing here that there was nothing romantic about it. Elrond's, "Forgive me," was clearly about kissing her without her consent. It was nothing more than a means to an end, an opportunity to slip her that piece from his coat. That forehead touch afterwards, though? That was sincere. That was them

Elrond trusting Vorohil with Durin's army? Yes please. I love how it took only one mission for Vorohil to become an Elrond fanboy and for Elrond to trust him enough to rely on him now. My boy had hearts in his eyes when Elrond rode away

oh Celebrimbor is shackled now ... is he going to cut off his own hand to free himself?

fuck yeah, Durin! You tell them! What a great speech! I am getting goosebumps here

Elrond's battle theme, let's go! He's so badass, I love it

nooooo not his horse!

lol I guess the lesson we're learning here today is: do not fuck with Elrond's horse (or those he loves). You will regret it

that moment he took with his horse ... I'm not crying, you are

"You told us you loved us." Glûg, breaking my heart. Also did anyone else notice the Uruks in the background caring for the wounded? I love these touches of humanity

oh Galadriel, why did you leave Elrond's cloak thingy behind? Once again I am asking you: are you trying to get him killed?

and Arondir to the rescue. It's about time he joins forces with Team Lindon

Durin in battle armour <3

no, no, no! If Narvi is hurt, does that mean Disa is too?

oh shit, it's either save Eregion or save Khazad-Dûm. Poor Durin

"Our sufferings." Exactly my thoughts, Celebrimbor

"You chose it." Fuck off, Sauron. Seriously? Still with the gaslighting? Celebrimbor, please throw another hammer at him. Or stab him in the eye with something small and sharp

thank the Valar Celebrimbor is not falling for his tricks anymore

oh Celebrimbor is defying him and throwing them into the fire! I am so ridiculously happy to see him fighting back

good teamwork there, Elrond and Rían

the rings are cold to the touch! Like the One! Because of Sauron's blood!

oh fuck, he is going to cut off his thumb! Look how his hands are shaking! This is horrifying but also such a moment of triumph

Charlie Edwards, the actor you are. That reaction? I'm a mess

poor Celebrimbor does not have much luck when it comes to escaping the forge, does he?

nooooo, Malendol, don't lock him back in. Please. Don't listen to Annatar, I beg you

Galadriel, I have never been so glad to see you. It is you, isn't it? Because if it is not ...

he's staying behind. Of course he is. That's who he is. But he won't be alone - for the first time, since Halbrand set foot into the city again, he will not be alone. Thank you, Malendol

"Light endures." Oh, that speech. I am honestly tearing up right now

no, not Rían! Please, not Rían!

oh fuck, she's such a badass!

I hate that Elrond cannot even go to her and comfort her

war is terrible and this episode portrays that so well. There is no glory. It's just death and devastation and so much loss

and now Damrod comes and it's going to get so much worse

and Annatar is not happy at all. This does not bode well for Celebrimbor. But I love that Celebrimbor gets to gloat. He deserves that

Annatar, keep your filthy hands off Malendol and his soldiers

gods, this scene is so chilling

not Malendol. I mean, it was brave to try, but damn, why?

I really must not get attached to random background elves. This is too painful. First Rían, now Malendol? My only consolation is that Vorohil and Camnir (hopefully far away in Lindon) are safe

that elf getting trampled by Damrod? I don't know why but that scene already made me tear up in the trailer. Poor guy

oh gods he's using Uruks as a shield

that's not going to end well for Adar

oh shit, Elrond! Fuck, that was vicious! Those breathless noises he is making! He's trying so hard and I'm afraid he's once again doomed to fail and it breaks my heart

Gil-galad! I was wondering where you were! Chilling behind the lines? Having a cup of tea? Nice of you to join the battle.

also dear gods, he looks so much like Mark Ferguson in his armour. I can't. This is everything

Arondir in his Legolas era! I love it!

oh and it's a team effort! Yes!

Aeglos!!!

the only thing keeping Elrond on his feet at this point is adrenaline and sheer determination

Glûg, baby, take your family and run as far away as you can

it's dawn. That means Durin is coming, right? I mean, I know they should but why do I get the feeling that they won't?

oh the Helm's Deep parallels

why the fuck is Vorohil hurt? I cannot bear this. Let me keep my Elf OCs, show, please!

oh no, the gates of Khazad-Dûm are shut. And Elrond still has faith in his friend. This is going to break my heart, isn't it?

"Durin will come." Oh Elrond, let me hug you

more Aeglos action! Fuck yeah!

Arondir and Adar stabbing each other with arrows is such a mood. But I swear if this show takes Arondir from me as well ...

okay, he's still alive. Let's keep it that way, please

and the wall has fallen. Eregion has fallen

not Elrond sitting there all shell-shocked and crying. My heart cannot take this

no, Elrond, why are you wearing Nenya?

I mean, let's be real, Gil-galad ordered him to. Personally, I would have left that damn ring with Círdan but what do I know?

Elrond collapsing at the end - I am not okay

This is my general feeling after this episode btw. I am not okay. None of this is okay.

[jackdaniel69nice]

since i am an angst connoisseur and starved of content i gotta ask, based on your timeline, what would your idea of "the incident" be?

my other question is, what happened that warranted the bandages?

Hi! When I posted about Tokoyami’s parents I made illusions to this incident but I can go into more detail!

There was a lot of drama that lead up to the incident, specifically the loss of Tokoyami’s grandparents who understood and took care of him and shadow the best and this loss devastated tokoyami. His other family members (aunts and uncle) also didn’t cope with the death well and weren’t able to support him, leaving him to his mother’s overbearing and strict lifestyle. He acts out more and gets in fight at school due to grief and it gets him in trouble. He is also trying to suppress this grief response because that is what he was taught so it is building up.

When his mother scolds (yells) at him after school for having a break down at school and “attacking the teacher” (the teachers was shining lights at shadow and they had enough and fought back). He is so frustrated and angry he purposefully releases dark shadow so they can attack her. He quickly loses control though and when his father defends Kohane (his mother) he gets terribly injured damaging organs and his spine so it’s hard to walk. As much as the incident itself is traumatic, the things that follow are much worse.

Tokoyami is arrested first of all and left in high containment nearly a week. His aunt who just recently had triplets finally comes to get him. during his time in jail he has a very wrong “realization” that everything wrong with life is actually dark shadows fault and blames them.

You see, his mother has been trying to instill this idea in him for a very long time. If he can just force dark shadow to behave, to control them, then everything will be fine and he can have a normal life. His grandfather though, always stressed the idea that dark shadow and him need to work together in cooperation, and harmony. Now that his grandfather is gone he is doubting his word and dark shadow injuring his father in their rage makes his mother’s words ring more true than ever. So tokoyami decided to finally lock down on dark shadow, no more leniency, no more free rein. Tokoyami is the warden and shadow is his prisoner, nothing more than a puppet. To keep the people he loves safe…right?

Welllll dark shadow is not happy about this. They are heart broken, worse than, completely betrayed, scared, Fumikage is supposed to be the one person they can trust, their other half, who would never turn on them, never blame them. All they ever tried to do was protect him, why are you doing this?? This isn’t fair. If they can’t trust Fumikage then they can’t trust anyone. The whole world is rotten. And everything is Fumikage’s fault.

So basically tokoyami starts a war for control with dark shadow that is taking place within his mind. Unfortunately Tokoyami’s aunt can’t have an unstable preteen near her newborns and reluctantly drops him off with his mother. Kohane needs to take care of her husband who is still in the hospital (not to mention her own injuries) and has no idea what to do with tokoyami…so she does nothing. She tells him to stay in his room with the lights on and not leave. She comes home, brings him a meal, leaves, locks the door, then returns to the hospital for a few hours to do it all over again. Meanwhile Tokoyami’s mind is slipping.

Tokoyami has had mental training his whole life to control dark shadow. It just upset shadow so much he never used it to its full extent. Now he has no care for “hurting” shadow, they’re just a beast after-all. So he sticks shadow in a cage doesn’t let them out. Dark Shadow fights so hard for their freedom at every chance they get, every scrap of darkness they find, they let it full their strength, their rage. They fight with everything they have until Tokoyami’s mind is in tatters, shredded by their claws from the inside. He paces the floor, he can’t eat, he can’t sleep, he pulls feathers and bites his nails. All for some semblance of clarity, to make his head stop hurting. He plays loud music to drown out shadows cries. He bangs head against the floor to match the migraine shadow is forcing from the inside. He feels like he is splitting, he thinks he is dying, maybe he is, maybe they will tear each other apart. He losing time, losing memory, he’s not sure where he ends and shadow begins. Drowning in darkness.

And one day it stops. One of them had to give, and for some reason it was Dark Shadow. They are quiet for a while much to Tokoyami’s confusion, did he win? Why does this victory feel so hollow? Why does it hurt. Regardless, it happens just in time for him to start his new middle school which is…special. For kids just like him.

Anyways dark shadow isn’t completely compliant obviously; they just let up the constant fighting. The “years they Endoor” (Dark Ages) are spent like distant roommates that despise each other. Stay on your side of the room and don’t look at each other. Unfortunately dark shadow’s only ability to converse while caged is with tokoyami telepathically so they end up bickering a lot still.

((Dark Shaodw has a reason for ending the fighting. Tokoyami just doesn’t remember it))

I’m really glad you asked about this anon because I have simply been dying to talk about it. To answer your question more simply. The incident refers to tokoyami losing control again but instead of protecting someone it was from pure built up malice. His hands are bandaged, his feathers unkempt, and him being visibly unwell is because of the mental break following the event and due to self harm.

Perhaps you are thinking Tokoyami should have gone to the mental hospital, and you would be right. Unfortunately he has been to hospitals before where he was horribly treated (part of the Trauma of his past) and has a fear of doctors and psychiatrist now. He wouldn’t take himself to the hospital ever. Kohane was also aware of how terrible Tokoyami’s mental state was, she was the one who would bandage his fingers and force him to eat when he couldn’t. She is also afraid of the hospitals mistreating him again (she feels responsible for him suffering through their abuse before) but there is also her stigma towards poor mental health in general. In Japan there is a wide spread stigma towards mental illness and the mentally disabled, such conversations are taboo. Kohane was raised very traditionally to suppress her emotions and never seek mental help, she wouldn’t have taken tokoyami anyway, even if it had killed him.

[moonlit-mystery-writer]

@myrmyrtheorca Decided to make it a separate post to ramble more! Now onto Bel’s and Rasiel’s mother!

Small trigger warning for character death and pregnancy. And their dad being really shitty, but not quite abusive? (At least from my knowledge what he does isn’t quite abuse, just really shitty.)

Skin as white as snow, wavy and long hair as dark as ebony wood, eyes that dazzle like polished rubies, and lips as red as blood.

To most, an interesting beauty to behold. But to the small village she grew up in, in the secret and unnamed country (I do have a headcanon name for Bel’s and Rasiel’s country, but that can be for another day) Lisette Bruyère was a complete outcast. Being very sickly also didn’t help her. Even so, she remained pleasant and kind to those around her. In her times alone, she quickly figured out she could do minor illusions. Nothing massive, but small things like glimmering lights. Unbeknownst to her, she was a Mist flame.

Years later, after the new king takes over the kingdom, King Armoniel is set on finding his queen. Known for his cold, cruel ways much like all the rulers before, so no one in his kingdom was eager to offer him a bride.

So when no one else wanted to sacrifice their daughters to the king, Lisette was forced to take the role. By the village basically threatening to her father’s business, the only thing helping her family make money. She wasn’t happy with this. Who could be? But she did it for the sake of her father.

Unfortunately for her! King Armoniel falls for her near instantly, quickly taking her back to his castle. Now don’t mistake this for true love, it’s ultimately just a deep obsession. All the King wanted was to own her as a possession. Even so, he made sure others feared her as his Queen and showered her in any gifts he deemed worthy.

Her opinion mattered very little to him. After all, why should he care that the silver he adorns her and himself with causes her discomfort at best and rashes at worst. He’s the king after all, he only needs to think about himself. In fact, most of the time he was away from the castle as a whole, never spending much time with her. Everything about her new life as Queen was very draining for Lisette. She felt lonelier than ever despite how many servants were around to wait on her hand and foot. She was often described as a living ghost haunting the castle.

Armoniel’s behavior towards her didn’t improve until it was time for heirs in his eyes. Then he shifted his attention fully to her for multiple months, doing everything he can for her and even giving her his most loyal butler; Olgert. Lisette wasn’t stupid though, she knew his intentions fully well. But… She allowed it. She’d be lying if she said she didn’t want children. Even if her situation isn’t ideal.

Part of her was hoping she could turn her country around with the next heirs. Maybe all the royal family needed is to be cared for by tender hands and held with love. Through out her pregnancy with the twins, she’d prattle on and on about them and her hopes for them. She hardly knew them, but she loved her sons with all her heart.

In fact, she never got to know her sons at all. Her previous health issues caught her by the end of her pregnancy, causing an early labor by a week. While Rasiel and Bel survived, Lisette was not as lucky despite doctors best attempts.

Armoniel was upset over his wife’s death, but more in the way of someone losing their favorite decoration would be than full mourning. Either way, he reacted by having all pictures removed of her except for an expensive and large portrait he had traditionally painted for their wedding. That portrait was all the twins had to know their mother. No one truly spoke of her to them, especially not their father.

They grew up under the her portrait’s watchful eyes. Eyes they shared with her, hidden under their bangs.

[punkeropercyjackson]

Once again i am being plauged by the parallels between the og Dead Sea Siblings and Ghostflower,be it romantic or found siblings.Nico,Percy,Miles and Gwen all being so mix and match only makes me suffer 10x more /pos.You're a boy with no real friends at this weird school where you don't fit in and one day,you met this girl who's a little older than you and she is the COOLEST ever.You've got this little crush on her and she's so nice to you and it only makes it grow and turns out she was there because she's part of the new world you're about to join and when the new supernatural shit in your life finishes hitting it's beginner stage including one of your family member's who took so much care of you getting killed,you don't see her for a WHOLE year.She taught you because she's got way more experience than you but you were friends for so short of time that you only know the babysteps and you want her back so bad,more than anything because so little time filled you with so much love.And her?She feels the same way about you and it's hard to go on with her life normally when she's so worried about you but the forces of world saving leads one of you to the other's room again and they welcome you in with open arms and they give their mamí's food that you've never tried before and it's fucking DELICIOUS just like they said and your convo is a mix of hero talk and catching up

You get closer and closer because all that buried love is bursting out and you're a team again but then,you're reminded why you're here.Your dad is a monster and you want out of that haunted 'home'.Your first friend makes you feel safe for once so you try to stick around as long as you can and they're happy you do even if things are getting harder.They see you more than ever now

You haven't always had it easy and you're not the only one.You didn't wanna hurt them but you did.You thought you knew the rest but you didn't.In every other generation,Hades kids are outcasts and in every other generation,it dosen't end well.They're angry at you,of course they are,you BETRAYED them so you're not angry back,you only want to explain and they don't wanna hear it but they don't hate you now like you've convinced yourself.Nothing could ever make them hate you,not even canon itself and the crush isn't a crush anymore,it's grown into something woven into your souls that you both put there.Maybe some things are meant just for you two

It's not easy but you repair your relathionship and that's when the illusions of eachother completely shatter and you're both better for eachother for it.She's not an unattainable perfect goddess,she's a huge dork with dork tastes and all that shit she's pulled wasn't even planned beforehand,she's just batshit insane and she's your best friend ever and he's not a meek little helpless boy you can't let do things by himself,he's one of the strongest hero's in existence and can stand up to people way older than him with no fear-not unlike you actually!-and you're reminded why you believed in him so much even without seeing much of him on the field and he's your favorite boy ever.You have so much history and it's been rough but you're together now and when it's only you two,you finally feel normal.There's a first time for everything,right?

[justmenoworries]

Sometimes I think about Amazing Spider-Man #615-616 and get sad, because everything about this story is just so tragic. Sandman genuinely trying to be a good father. Keemia having so much fun with her daddy and not being the least bit scared of him, because why should she be? He's loving, he's kind, he waits on her hand and foot, he made her a princess, for crying out loud.

And she doesn't know Flint killed her mother, because not even Flint himself knows. They're both convinced they're just gonna get Keemia's mom and abuela later, for now they just want some quality father-daughter time alone.

Spidey is, of course, forced to break that illusion because well-intentioned or not, what Flint did is still kidnapping. (And murder. Can't forget about that.) And the whole story you kinda can't help rooting for Flint and Keemia, because yeah, Spidey is objectively right in getting this little girl to safety, but isn't she already safe? Flint genuinely doesn't want to hurt her, he literally tells Spider-Man that Keemia is his everything and all he wants is be a good dad to her.

The sheer horror Flint feels when his sand-duplicates tell him that they killed Alma and two other people because they felt they were a threat to the happy life they built with Keemia and he wasn't even aware of it.

There's this feeling that everything didn't need to turn out this way, that maybe Keemia's castle really could have been this happy, safe place with no dark secrets and no victims. This story isn't a happy one by any means. We don't get a good ending when Spider-Man rescues Keemia and defeats Sandman. Keemia is given into foster care because the system decided her abuela wasn't fit to get custody. Peter even finds himself questioning whether he truly did the right thing afterwards.

Keemia's new foster family is uncaring and she gets bullied and mistreated the second she steps into the house.

The way the story begins and ends with Keemia's monologue is haunting, really showcasing how, from her perspective, Spider-Man ruined her life. He took her away from her castle, a place where her and her father were happy. He destroyed her kingdom. He promised her to bring her back to her abuela, but then handed her over to strange people who took her to a cold, unloving home.

[krisistrying]

I need to ramble about A Plague Tale: Requiem

Man i have so many thoughts over a plague tale: requiem and i need to share them or write them down somewhere or I think i will aHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

the game is so good dude, like, holy shit. i loved innocence, i really did, but there were some aspects that were okay. ya know? like, sometimes i think there was this whole, "illusion of choice" thing present. like more than one way to get pass enemies but in truth there wasn't really.

but requiem? holy shit dude, requiem really dID give you a choice. I noticed it the MOMENT Lucas pointed out how Amicia (the player, technically) handled the situation, and the game showed 3 different like, skills that will develop depending on how you get by enemies. One for stealth, one for aggressiveness/fighting, and another that I don't really understand but I think it had to do with alchemy. And oh BOY WERE THERE CHOICES IN THIS GAME.

There's like, all kinds of different ways to get by enemies, 17 different PATHS, DUDE IT'S SO GOOD. HOLY SHIT WHAT THE FUCK

the story, oH MY GOD, THE STORY WAS SO GOOD AND TRAGIC. I LOVED the new characters. I absolutely adored Sophia, though I wish they gave Arnaud a bit more screentime. With him we just snuck around and walked around town. With Sophia we like, spent a whole fucking day with her. The game did such a good job at establishing her character. Showing her traits and her thoughts and loyalty. My favorite being after she finds out about the rats, after she finds out about the curse, after she learns EVERYTHING, she STILL choses the kids. She still picks them. Still helps them. She stays by their side until the end and even more so then. GOD, it was so good, and I loved her character. And I'm sO HAPPY SHE DIDN'T DIE.

We didn't see much of Beatrice but one scene with her keeps replaying in my head. When the rats are taking over the town, and Amicia reaches Beatrice and Hugo. Beatrice watches the rats, believing, yet also hoping Amicia's words will reach Hugo in time. And there's a moment, where, she accepts the worst. Accepts the fate of herself and her children. And rather than panicking, rather than scolding Amicia, or telling her to hurry, she hugs them. She hugs her children. She wraps her arms around them and holds them close. Because if this is truly the end, she wants to be with her children.

Beatrice, in all her being and faults, is not a perfect mother. And to me, she didn't have enough screen time to me to truly make an opinion of the type of mother she is. Yet, I think about that scene a lot. Because to me, it shows that she loved Amicia and Hugo dearly. She closed her eyes, held her children, and accepted her fate.

I loved Lucas in this game, you can truly tell that he's a bit more mature. That's he's grown from the previous game, and even the stuff that happened in between the two games (because apparently there's books that go over events between the two games and the moment they get translated I am going to buy the sHIT OUT OF THEM).

I love how he was the balance in this game. He kept Amicia and Hugo, especially Amicia grounded. He calmed them down, comforted them, supported them, held them, he was their strength when they had nothing left.

If the world was being consumed by a hurricane, Lucas was the eye of the storm.

You could tell how much he loved Amicia and Hugo, how much they meant to him. In Innocence it was obvious that he cared for them after a while. But Requiem showed that he began to love them. That they mean everything to him. Maybe it's because Lucas is my favorite character, but it was so obvious that he thought of them as family. Or at least as something as strong as family. They meant everything to him, he loved them both so much. The De Rune were his world, and it hurts to think that he almost lost it, and in some cases, practically did lose it.

Amicia, holy shit Amicia, it's so obvious the effect the 1st game had on her, the consequences, the toll. Amicia is ready for everything to go wrong, but she still holds on to hope that maybe, just maybe it won't. She acts less like a young girl trying to survive and weighing her decisions, and more like an adult who is ready to do what is necessary even if she doesn't want to. And it hurts. It hurts to see what she has become, and to see how the 1st game has changed her. It hurts to see her deal with trauma at a time where stuff like that wasn't really discovered??? At least I don't think it was all that known.

And Hugo? God, Hugo. My poor boy. You can tell how much he wants to be like other kids, how much he wants friends, and peace. How tired he is, he's 5 years old and he's already tired. He hadn't even lived yet, the choice to live was stolen from him by selfish assholes. And it hurts to see how afraid he is of dying in the beginning only to reach the end and... It's just so.. Obvious that he knows what has to be done. That he knows he's going to die. And he's okay with it. Hugo has come to terms with it and it hurts. He's 5. FIVE. FIVE YEARS OLD. When I played Innocence for the first time, all I could think about was, "Hugo has never been outside, this is his 1st time outside. This is his first impression of the outside world. A beautiful yet cruel place" And that thought is still so strong in Requiem. And it hurts.

This game hurts, and it knows it hurts. It's a beautiful yet cruel game. And I love it.

I can't stop thinking about it. It's all I can think about. God, I fucking love this game.

When people would ask me, "What's your favorite game?" I never had an actual answer. I could answer my favorite video game franchise, but I've never had a favorite game before.

Now, though? Requiem changes that.

I adore this game. Replaying it now hurts, but something is missing now. And I know what it is.

I want to experience the game for the first time again. In all it's beauty and pain.

I've never felt that way about a game before. And I love it.

I love Requiem. In all it's being.

To think none of this would have happened if I hadn't stumbled upon a random video showing Innocence's gameplay.

I wouldn't change a thing though.

[lisimcpisi]

Ok this might be going into more fantasy territory but I can’t stop thinking about that one episode from Steven Universe where Steven meets an illusion of his mom. Imagine Quasi dreaming that he’s meeting his mom and crying the whole time because he never experienced maternal affection in his life 😭😭😭

Quasi experiencing that “your name” type shit where even thought he doesn’t even remember what his mom looks like, he knows its her in his dream because mother son bonds 🥺🥺🥺

I’m stuck on whether or not his mother was like this guardian angel that watched Quasi and saw everything and essentially watched her son suffer or if she’s been stuck in like purgatory or smthn and he needs to catch her up on his life

Quasi’s mom would probably refer to him as “my son” or “my child” since Quasimodo wasn’t the name she chose for him. 

She basically explains that she was part of a community of Romani somewhere else in Europe, but we’re driven out of their home and needed to flee. Her brother had heard of an underground sanctuary for Romani in Paris (the court of miracles) so they set their sites there, in the hopes they would be welcomed. One night when they set up camp, Quasi’s mom found him in a basket drifting along the river and begged the others to keep the baby, to which they reluctantly agreed, on the condition that she be the one to take care of the baby.

Over the next few months of travel, the two form a mother-son bond. 

Even though they’re so happy to see each other, he keeps asking her so many questions like “did you really want me or was I a burden” and “oh my god Frollo made me believe all this horrible shit about you why aren’t you mad” that just break her heart

He feels rlly guilty about his mother’s death because he realized she must’ve had a family and home before he came along and feels like he’s responsible for her death

His mom gives him the simplest answers like “because I love you” or some sappy stuff because it really is just that. She loved him and would do anything in her power to protect him

Even though simple replies like that aren’t enough, he just keeps weeping in her arms out of pure relief that he finally knows he not only had a mom and was loved by her, but knows that he was loved before Frollo.

When he wakes up from his dream his eyes are read and his face is soaked with tears. He wastes no time carving a new figure of his mom with the muddled and quickly fading image of her in his mind

how does my brain come up with the most heartbreaking shit ever oh well now you get to suffer :))

[theluckywizard]

happy fridayyyy lucky! how about “Pretending to be happy is exhausting.” for Rose??

Ohhh thanks, Niri! I'm using this one for the opener of my cracky fluff smut fic where Garrett Hawke and Rose Trevelyan are fixed up by their enterprising mothers. This would be 'Chapter 1'.

For @dadrunkwriting

WC: 1273

Rating: Gen

Summary: Alsatia Trevelyan wants her daughter to marry. Her friend Leandra Hawke wants to see her son happily settled. Neither Rose nor Hawke are interested in being matched. :smirkyyyy:

Chapter 1

Rose Trevelyan fidgets inside the prison of a gown her mother Alsatia’s selected for her, her stay poking her with a sort of punishing savagery. It’s a nice color at least, Maker knows she’s made some horrific choices in past for these sorts of things: constructions in wildly patterned puce and umber that call up visions of drapery from the last age. Even her fiery red hair is tugged and combed and pinned into a coif as staid as the gown— pinched and proper, every bit of herself smoothed away under a polished veneer.

Kirkwall imposes itself upon the pair as they lean to look out the carriage. Ancient Tevinter statues that evoke a brutal history, monolithic buildings that climb high from the Waking Sea which sloshes in filthy hues from the refuse and sewage that spills into it. The carriage winds slowly from the docks up through the undesirable parts of the city, teeming with too many people who watch the carriage ascend toward Hightown with derision.

“I wish they would hurry up,” mutters Alsatia, fiddling with her delicate kidskin gloves anxiously.

“Oh I’m sorry, Mother, are the unwashed masses making you nervous?” asks Rose. “Didn’t you tell me that Leandra lived in these parts before her son restored her fortunes?”

“Well it’s not as though she wanted to be down here any more than I do,” retorts Alsatia. 

“And wasn’t she a Blight refugee? From a humble life in Ferelden she chose for herself? I’m amazed you ever managed to become friends in the first place.”

“Hush, Rose,” says the elder Trevelyan, drawing her furs tighter around her neck.

“It’s true. You can be an unbelievable snob,” presses Rose. “But maybe you weren’t so stuffy back in the day.”

“Polish up that mouth of yours,” she warns her.

“Or what? He won’t make me an ill-fated offer of marriage?” she asks. Alsatia’s frosty eyes land on her daughter’s with a determination that matches her daughter’s flippant resistance. “Truly though. Isn’t he some sort of swashbuckling treasure hunter? I’d be amazed if he cared.”

“He’s richer than the Maker and an Amell and you will do your best to make a favorable impression.”

“I thought he was a Hawke.”

“The name doesn’t matter as much as the lineage.”

Rose slumps back and huffs a sigh. Aside from Alsatia’s industrious pursuit of an advantageous match for her daughter, she knows it’s all a clever plot to avoid her father’s family who descends upon Swinley House each Satinalia and treats her low born mother with thinly veiled contempt. This time Rose is to be introduced to the son of her old friend Leandra Amell, who famously absconded to Fereldan with an apostate mage. The upper crust never forgets these sorts of things. Rose certainly knows that.

Rose has no illusions about her own dwindling appeal. A whole twenty five years old, with a catastrophic flop of an engagement that rocked the Marcher aristocracy under her belt and a handful of rejected marriage offers that trail behind her like a foul stench. And now she’s being fixed up with a Fereldan man rumored to be as wild as he is handsome and as ill-bred as he is rich. 

“You will take this seriously, Rose. I know you are not keen on the cloister. You’d have security. A good home. Maker knows Leandra would dote on you.”

Rose snorts to herself. Together they’d make one proper noble.

Not to mention the obvious mage blood he must carry. Perhaps they can bond over that mark against them.

“Mother. I know.”

“I’ll never understand why you fight this so hard. It certainly doesn’t help that your father indulges you with that bow. You're becoming coarse around the edges.”

“I just want to be my own woman. In my own home. I don’t want to have to pretend. It’s exhausting. Sod it all.”

“You’ve always been hopelessly idealistic,” mutters Alsatia, glancing out the window, her breath fogging against the glass even in the mild Kirkwall winter. “It looks like we’re nearly there. The views from up here are rather breathtaking, don’t you think? And Hightown. It looks as fine as it ever did.”

Rose cranes to look, the views across the harbor between pristine marble buildings rather divine considering. 

And at least she’s getting out of Ostwick.

oOo

Hawke pulls on the warm wool doublet his mother Leandra’s had fitted for him, admiring how well it looks in the mirror. A deep blue gray that complements his sky colored eyes. Maybe he’d wear it around town. He’s quite pleased with it, really. At least until he notices the geometric lines of the Amell crest embossed into each leather fastening.

“You really have a thing about this crest, don’t you?” he notes, looking over his shoulder at his mother who squeezes both his arms and tucks her chin around him. 

“I do,” says Leandra, gazing up at her son in the mirror. “And you should too. It’s yours as well.”

He feels a hand ruffling in the shaggy chestnut colored hair behind his ears.

“You should have trimmed this mess before today,” she scolds him.

“I’ll tie it back if you want. But I’m sure they expect me to be a slobbering dog lord. I doubt a proper hair cut would change their opinion,” says Hawke. “And no offense, Mother, but the Marcher aristocracy is nothing short of a horror show. I’d take an Orlesian noble over a Marcher. Then at least she’d bitch about my ill-breeding in a gorgeous language I can pretend I don’t understand.”

Leandra eyes her son sternly for approximately two seconds before it fails against the affection that surges from behind it.

“They will be staying with us. You will be on your best behavior, darling,” she says. “You’re twenty-nine now. I won’t always be around to take care of you— and I want to see you settled.”

“Tell me again how you met the love of your life through formal introductions with the offspring of your parents’ noble acquaintances,” says Hawke, he turns and kisses his mother on the top of her head easily. “Oh that’s right. You were sneaking around Kirkwall with an apostate mage claiming your funny business behind your parents’ backs. Wasn't I conceived before you got hitched?”

Leandra evades his impertinence.

“I don’t ask what you do on your own time, Garrett, darling. But I’ve seen you fritter away years pining for Aveline. She’s a dear sweet girl, but if it were meant to be—” 

“Don’t. You’ll start sounding like Varric.”

The truth of the matter twists inside him like he hasn’t already started to come to grips with it. Maybe if he hadn’t had that dream once he wouldn’t have been so inclined to like her— to believe she meant something. 

“Humor me. If you don’t like her, no harm done. At the very least it will be lovely to have company this Satinalia. So it’s not so empty.” 

He can’t argue with this. Truthfully the mansion’s felt a bit like a monstrosity since he purchased the deed. He’s taken on Orana and Bodahn and Sandal and yet the quiet is practically deafening in the absence of Carver and Bethany’s bickering and banter. Maker he missed them. 

“So what’s she like, this Rose Trevelyan?” he asks.

“She’s an accomplished lutist and harpist. Well-educated in history and politics. Speaks Orlesian and Antivan—“

Hawke drops his head to the side chidingly.

“That doesn’t tell me anything. What’s she like?”

Leandra’s expression in so inscrutable that he feels sure there’s some defect of character that his mother worries over. Either something she knows he’ll hate or something she knows the aristocracy hates.

“Mother… what’s wrong with her?”

“It’s hard for me to say as I had it from Alsatia herself. Suffice to say my friend is worried her daughter will never find a suitable match for her.”

“She’s one of those poor women then? Passed over for others time and again?”

“Actually quite the opposite. She seems to reject everyone.”

“Well that should make this easy then!” he cries, delighted to be free.

“Garrett.”

“Mother.”

“Try. I see the way you pretend to be happy for me. I want you to be happy.”

“I think it’s darling that you think marriage is going to solve that. But don’t you worry,” he says, bending to squash his mother against him inside his substantial arms. “I promise. If she can keep up with me, I’ll marry her.”

“Not even your friends can keep up with you.”

“Exactly!”

[apolesen]

Hi! I know it’s been while since youve posted anything about Parmak and his family you made for him, or I haven’t seen anything? But I’ve been so curious and I just love your Parmak family! I don’t know if you’ve talked about it before, but how would you think it’d be (if they survive the war) for the family together after the war and even when Kelas and Garak get back together? Love all your fics!

First of all, thank you for this! It was so lovely to receive, and it's an important reason why I've started posting fic again. Secondly, sorry it's taken me so long to answer it. Real life has not been kind to me the past few months, but now things are a little less intense and I have time to answer this properly.

So, to your question. I'm going to said right off the bat that I'm leaving Arva, Kerisa's husband, out of this, as that is a fic that I am hoping to write at some point. So I'll concentrate on Parmak's sisters and nieces.

They definitely survive the Fire. In fact, when I mentioned in Love in a Time of Oppression that they liked in Lakarian City, my beta wrote back 'but they live right??' A couple of years after the courts decide Parmak can live on his own, Kerisa moves the whole family sans brother to Cardassia III. They're now known as the family of a traitor to the state, and it's not fun for anyone. They get through the Fire, on account of being in an outer colony which was less heavily hit by the Jem'Hadar and also thanks to some quick thinking by some of the daughters. In time, they make their way back to Prime.

Kerisa is mildly disapproving of this whole democracy thing that Kelas has gotten involved in. She asks 'but what happens when they reestablish the old order?' 'They won't,' he says, and the hope and relief in his voice touches her. Eventually, she lets the question go. She doesn't really understand it, just like many older Cardassians don't, but seeing her brother so in his element, so respected... she can't help but be happy for him. That, in fact, is what she feels about Garak too. She can't figure out why she feels uneasy about him, but she acquiesces. This new friend of Kelas' makes him happy.

Kerisa's daughters, of course, are well aware of the role Garak played in the uprising against the Dominion. They are all adults at this point. I'm not sure what the three younger daughters do, but Zeetal, the eldest, has become a dentist and is fully on board with her uncle's proposals to reform Cardassian health-care. She's quite pragmatic and doesn't really say it, but she's secretly very proud of her uncle the dissident. She and her sisters are also under no illusions about what his and Garak's relationship is.

Garak, of course, spends a lot of time working to charm Parmak's family. Kerisa is a little stand-offish, but Zina adores him. He talks to her about music and soaps (he's a sucker for them, unsurprisingly). For her hatch-day he gives her a little succulent to take care of. Zina is still very sheltered, but with Cardassian society changing, Parmak prods Kerisa to let her spend more time outside and on her own. After a while, Kerisa allows Garak to take her to the botanical gardens. Still not quite able to let go, she gets a table at the garden's café, fully intent to watch them throughout their visit. Kelas says this man can be trusted, but she doesn't like leaving Zina alone with anyone. So she watches them as they walk along the flower-beds, Zina's hand in the crook of Garak's arm. They keep stopping, and Zina dips out of view. Kerisa tries to make sense of what they are doing. As they continue around the bed of roses, she can see them both in profile. She sees Garak gesticulate with his free hand – she realises he is talking. Then Zina leans forward, towards the rosebush. Taking a rose in her hand, she puts her nose close to it and smells it. Kerisa can't really name what she's feeling. Why does that make her feel so odd? Because she has never thought to take Zina to smell the flowers. But this man did. She finishes her tea and leaves. She knows Garak will get Zina home safely.