#all scenes are pretty much canon and have no other explanation other than foreshadowing their relationship

[coraniaid]

(Answering @badwolfwho1's questions for this character ask game; three of four.)

Cordelia

5 What's the first song that comes to mind when you think about them?

...yeah, this is just because of that scene in The Puppet Show, sorry. But I do think it's kind of arc-appropriate that Buffy's Shadow Self Cordelia sings a song about not wanting to live in anybody's shadow and then (eventually) leaves town.

12 What's a headcanon you have for this character?

Not exactly original to me but I think I am increasingly an ace Cordy truther. 

I know there are other explanations for some of the way she’s written in Buffy and that, in the high school years in particular, the writers really don’t seem to like to suggest that any of the women on the show might have any interest in sex as such (which is probably the real reason Xander spends more time talking about how physically attractive Willow’s boyfriend Oz is than Willow herself ever manages, tempting as it is to think of that as deliberate bisexual Xander / lesbian Willow foreshadowing).  

But Cordelia especially seems particularly confused (and occasionally actively repulsed) by the mere idea of sexual desire (“does looking at guns really make girls want to have sex?” she asks Xander in Innocence, while surrounded by guns herself, “That’s scary.”; “I get it!” she announces while Faith is talking to Buffy about the side-effects of Slaying, before quickly clarifying “Not the horny thing.  Yuck.”) despite the show also being clear that Cordelia has definitely had sex (among other things, there’s the story she tells about “a friend, not me” who had sex in her car and “kicked the gearshift”  in the health class in Bad Eggs). The general impression is, I feel, pretty striking (but, yeah, absolutely unintentional).

20 Which other character is the ideal best friend for this character, the amount of screentime they share doesn't matter?

In canon I really like Cordelia’s emergent friendship with Angel. No offense meant to the Cangel shippers, I just don’t really see the appeal of their relationship being romantic (and, for other reasons, I don't like the seasons where it's suggested that it might be, so it's not a take I'm normally exposed to much).  I said in a recent post that Angel doesn’t really exist in Buffy except as Buffy’s boyfriend (sometimes Cordelia or Faith might express some interest in him, but they are very clearly only doing so because he is Buffy’s boyfriend).  So it’s nice that Angel gets to be something more like a real person in his own show, and to form relationships with people that don’t have anything to do with Buffy anymore.  

(I know that many people on here like to suggest that Buffy and Cordelia would have remained friends after Cordelia left Sunnydale, but canon doesn’t really support that at all and I don’t think I see it either – I think post-high school Buffy and Cordelia would both see each other as representative of an old life they’re trying to move beyond and probably not make any effort to stay in touch -- it's noteworthty that when either of them talk about each other post-Graduation Day, which almost never happens, they do so fairly dismissively.)

Beyond canon, I think Anya and Cordelia would have gotten on well and I think it’s a shame (and slightly hard to explain in any in-universe way) that they never interact after The Wish.  Surely Cordelia is (from Anya’s perspective) the whole reason Anya is a human!  From her perspective, she’s the first person in a thousand years whose wish she was unable to grant, and trying to do so cost her her powers.  The only reason Anya can have for not being slightly obsessed about her is the fact she knows Cordelia is going to be written out of the show soon.  And equally Cordelia, post-Lovers Walk, is very clearly badly in need of a friend: that's why she starts talking to and hanging out with Anya in the first place!  And yet, after The Wish, nothing.  Feels like a wasted opportunity.

[gallusrostromegalus]

I think there's two things going on in canon about Aizen:

Aizen doesn't kill captains in the first big battle of his betrayal because he can't.

1. The doylist explanation of his actions is so blatantly transparent (shonen jump scheduling hell) that it overwhelms the subtle watsonian clues that kubo gives us which are:

2. Aizen is a lying bitch. To absolutely everyone around him, but most of all, to himself.

He takes great pains to disguise it. He talks a big game and definitely tries his best to kill, but he doesn't. it makes tactical sense for him to kill at least SOMEONE before fucking off to hueco Mundo but even the fucking off belies the problem. He's a tough customer, but if he really were capable of killing another captain in a fight, he wouldn't have bothered with the whole fake corpse theater- he would have just picked them off one by one while quietly completing the hogyoku until Yamamoto had straight-up run out of strong enough shinigami to promote and Aizen had made himself a god while nobody was looking.

Instead, Aizen's plan relies on (and fails at) having the captains kill each other, and building an army of warm bodies to put between himself and the rest of the Court Guard until the Hogyoku is complete, which pretty much screams "I cannot win, even in a pitched fight".

EVEN WHEN THE HOGYOKU IS COMPLETE, Aizen doesn't stick around to actually finish off the captains- he bolts to the living world AGAIN and shuts the portal doors behind him.

-

Now that we know that Aizen is mostly smoke and mirrors who is desperately trying to stay alive until his godhood hax kick in, his pattern of avoidance of real threats reveals something interesting:

It's funny that you mention him being afraid of Yamamoto because I think he is afraid, but not of Yamamoto. Aizen doesn't want anyone to think he's scared of anything, but it's better you think it's Yamamoto than The Actual Problem. If you ignore everything Aizen says and just look at how close he's willing to even let other captains get to his person, there is one captain he's TERRIFIED of above all others.

He spends exactly one scene in the same room with them, and only when he knows the meeting is ending early.

He absolutely refuses to taunt them- in fact, they're the person he spends the most time trying to convince that he is actually dead.

When confronted by the various captains, he glaots a bit and then tries to kill them- except one, whole monologues at exactly long enough for Gin to cause a distraction, and then DIPS. He even cuts his big monologue at the execution grounds short because this Captain is incoming.

When the finale of the winter war begins, Aizen makes a point of not being in the same dimension as this captain, and when they're approaching, he leaves for the living world.

Again and again and again, there is one captain, one person, that Aizen stays far, far away from:

Unohana.

I don't think this is intentional on Kubo's part, (unless it's severely underplayed foreshadowing which is a shame) but given how kubo treats his female characters and how he doesn't really seem to understand what a doctor does, I think Aizen's pattern of staying the hell away from Unohana is accidental, but it's my fic and I can have it be on purpose because it reveals some truly delicious motivation and interaction.

1. AEIWAM!Aizen (and to a similar extent, canon!Aizen) regularly squanders perfectly good resources or chances to fix the inequities of soul society because he's too far up his own ass to see the forest for the trees. One of the cheif blindspots he has is his rampant misogyny. Aizen regards the relationship between Gin and Rangiku as that of child and toy. He treats Momo as a disposable tool instead of recognizing she was the one who got closest to actual killing any of the other captains. He seems to think the royal guard themselves will be easy to deal with- possibly because the only one he ever knew in person was Hikifune, and it is so, so easy for a man like him to wildly low all the power and competence of someone like her. He rambles about the hollows having no inner life, but notably it's Hallibel that triggers this rant. It NEVER occurs to him that Orihime herself could be a problem - she's just a toy to take from Ichigo.

Aizen, simply put, does not think of women as people. He disregards the interiority of everyone around him, really, but ESPECIALLY the women around him.

...but this kind of objectification cuts both ways. Like most bigots, his inability to think of certain humans as people means he is also prone to greatly inflate the damage they can do in his mind until they become supernatural entities. "The Enemy is both pathetic and omnipotent" is an important basis of victim complexes, and Aizen Loooooves being the victim, so it makes PERFECT SENSE that his personal Boogeyman is none other than the woman he knows entirely as the quiet and dutiful doctor who has never set foot in battle but that all the older shinigami seem strangely eager to placate. Unohana is pathetically weak, so far as Aizen can tell, yet seems to effortlessly command the respect he so desperately craves. No wonder she lives rent-free in his head.

2. ... Ironically, Aizen is right about her. In canon, Unohana's past as the first kenpachi is not a secret, just largely forgotten. In AEIWAM, it's an actual secret because the Gotei-13 is playing a much more fraught game with the C46. Aizen genuinely has no idea she used to be captain of the 11th, so the weird bloodthirsty edges that he sometimes sees to her reiatsu, and the respect she commands with the other (smarter) captains is baffling.

In truth, Unohana is every inch the monster she was as a kenpachi as she is a medic. Flesh is hers to command and her willingness to cut and sculpt it to her desires hasn't changed- she is just now also capable of healing and reviving it into shape as well, which is much, much worse.

I haven't decided exactly how much Aizen knows about her by the time of his betrayal, but at least on a subconscious level, I think Aizen knows that Unohana is punching in a league well above most of the captains, if not above the old man himself at this point, and his inability to think of her as human means he is unable to assign human motives to her like most of his victims, so she appears terrifyingly unpredictable.

3. Even if it's a secret, some of the captains know, or have guessed. She was still Kenpachi when Shunsui and Ukitake started at the academy. Soi Fon is responsible for handling some of soul society's most sensitive information. Zaraki got his ass handed to him by her and has been in love ever since. Rangiku looked into giving blood once and realized that the most of donors to transplants didn't add up and the meat had to be coming from SOMEWHERE and oh wait that would explain everything huh.

There's a fun bit of play, I think, between the captains who knows Unohana is more than she at first appears, and the ones who haven't gotten a clue yet.

I may have wandered off topic.

MY POINT IS: Aizen doesn't kill captains when it makes tactical sense for him to do so because he is not capable of doing so. His whole strategy relies on not getting killed before he gets his godhood and up until he does, he's running like a rat.

Poor bastard.

If only he knew what was in store for him when he got there.

I did not care at all for Aizen Sosuke when I first read bleach. I found him boring, and worst, unthreatening.

So it's pretty jarring for me that I have been OBSESSED with him in your AU. I'm rotating him at great speed

Walt Disney was a jackass who was flat-out wrong about a lot of very important things, but he employed a great many geniuses of storytelling, and there's a piece in Disney Animation: The Illusion of Life by Frank Thomas and Ollie Johnson that discusses a key feature of Disney Studios Character Design:

"Of all characters, villains are the most fun to develop because they make everything else happen. They are the instigators, and always more colorful than the Hero. They may be dramatic, awesome, insidious or semi-comic, but they MUST be appealing. Almost any story becomes innocuous if all the evil is eliminated, but we do not necessarily gain strength by being frightening. we want a character that will hold the audience and entertain them, even if it's a Chilling Type of Entertainment."

And I've found that to be an important principle of character design, especially the kind of canon restructuring I do.

Aizen had a LOT going for him in canon- for all of Bleach's other faults, Aizen's conspiracy and THE REVEAL are spectacularly constructed and executed. I legit screamed and threw my mug across my dorm room when I read it in the manga the first time. He's also conventionally attractive and the translations I was reading gave him the speech patterns of Every Douchebag In Your 101 Political Theory Who Thinks He's The Smartest Man In The Room, which made him a terrific combination of Unfortunately Charming, Menacingly Competent and Engagingly Obnoxious.

...But he falls flat in a few key places.

Aizen's reasoning could be MUCH more sympathetic- After all, he is RIGHT. Soul Sciety does suck ass and all the options kind of suck. Who designs a universe like that? An asshole who needs killing, that's who. The best kind of Unhinged Madmen are the kind who spell out their reasoning and you realize that there but for the grace of Not Having Super Powers Go I. Canon!Aizen makes a few Good Rhetorical Points, but seems to lack any personal connection to his all-consuming plan.

Another issue is that nearly every villain with A Plan has a clear end goal AND a lot of the menace is drawn from the fact that the plan *could* work. Aizen's plan for betraying the court guard and then killing them off before proceeding into the Royal Realm to Kill God sorta falls apart when it's clear he planned to use pretty much all his accumulated forces dealing with the court guard and doesn't seem to have a plan for the Even More Powerful Royal Guard, let alone God. For how meticulously planned the rest of the plot is, the last two VERY IMPORTANT steps are just handwaved.

So I sat down and started with the plot beats Aizen MUST hit, and tried to imagine what kind of guy would he have to be to get there? And I came up with this:

Sosuke Aizen is a fundamentally good man with genuinely good intentions who is really trying his best for the whole world.

Think about it- what lengths would you NOT go to if you think you found a genuine shot at Fixing Everything Wrong With The World Forever? We all talk about killing Hitler if we found an actual Time Machine- would you do it if your only chance was when he was a baby? Would you kill an infant if it meant you could stop World War II before it starts? Of course you would! One small life for over 75 million? You'd be insane not to! What if you found out that you could prevent the future extinction of Humanity by killing your best friend today? Ten Billion lives? For theirs? It's simple, really- Hell, it's your Moral Obligation to do that if you were SURE!

-And Aizen IS sure. He is absolutely, totally, completely sure that He Can Save Everyone if he just gets rid of that idiot sitting on the throne of heaven. He's seen the plans! He knows where the gate of heaven is! It's So SIMPLE he just has to get inside, and he knows EXACTLY how to do it, yes it'll be hard and there will be... unpleasant parts but. IT. WILL. WORK.

He is of course, insane.

Aizen didn't have One Bad Day that set him irrevocably on the path of madness. It was a succession of catastrophic disappointments and realizations that he was living in a fundamentally irrational world that made irrational thinking look sane. The Catastrophe that befell his family, working for the central 46 and later the court guard and seeing how the organizations were inept to the point of abuse or corrupt to the core, learning that The Actual House Of God is a place he can just? Go to? Anyone would start thinking you were just a handful of white lies and homicides away from Fixing Everything, Forever.

Not only is Aizen insane, he is nowhere near as smart as he thinks. He is smart- He does have a knack for being able to guess just what will spur someone to action or make them recoil in fear. But mostly he gets extremely lucky Many, Many, MANY times. On some level I think it gives him Confirmation Bias that this is what he's supposed to be doing. Aizen is also nowhere near as smart as (nearly) everyone else thinks he is. His bizarrely good luck makes him look like a hyper-competent genius when really it was really the catastrophic failure of Soul Society as a Society that let a merely mediocre conspirator to evade detection for so long.

Being that he is at most, mediocre, he had to have Outside Help, specifically Gin's emotional support and Tousen's Competence- and if there's a part of the fic that stays true to canon, it's this.

Gin is Aizen's emotional rock in Canon. He's the ONE guy that Aizen genuinely trusts, and considers his 'my only real partner' in his scheme. There's more than one occasion in the manga where Aizen more or less asks Gin "Is this actually a good idea?" and Gin backs him up every time.

...Which is more than a bit at odds with Gin's later stated goal of "I did all this to kill you at your most vulnerable to protect rangiku" . It never rang true to me. So I started thinking why on EARTH Gin would be backing Aizen up like that, and realized there was a hole in my world building that he slotted into nicely :)

On the other hand, the entire fic was started because I didn't like how Tousen's character arc ended, so you can imagine how much he's changed.

But in canon, TOUSEN DOES ALL THE FUCKING WORK.

Lab work? Tousen.

Supervising the arrancar directly? Tousen

Actually getting victims for the Hogyoku experiments? Tousen.

Altering all the archives to keep Aizen's plot hidden? Tousen.

Sending all the Orders allegedly from the central 46? Tousen.

Making sure Unohana believes Aizen's fake body is real? Tousen.

Managing all the day-to-day operations at Las Noches? Tousen.

There's even this little exchange, which is Tousen's first appearance in the Manga:

Aizen establishes this entire meeting is a little fake-out a few pages later with "now isn't that a convenieint time for the alarm to go off?"

which makes him look like he's investigating, but he's also going "Good job on disrupting everyone with the alarm Gin!" It's ballsy of Aizen to do a check-in on his plan with his main nemesis in the room, but also his style.

I think the same thing is happening here with Tousen. To make sure Ukitake wouldn't raise a huge fit about the proposed execution of his beloved lieutenant, which might fuck everything up for Aizen because Ukitake is one of like, three people Yamamoto will listen to (sort of).

...So he had Tousen poison Ukitake to keep him out of the way.

ALL. THE. FUCKING. WORK. It's even in his name! The characters for "Tousen" Refer to a legendary scholar the emperor of China sent out to discover the secret of immortality- only to kill the scholar when he returned with that secret. The character for "Kaname" means "Necessary/Vital/keystone" or "to organize/take account of". His name LITERALLY means "Scholar who is essential for the plan (that we're going to kill later)"

Another thing Kubo did well in Bleach: his name game is Off The Fucking Charts.

-but I digress.

In AEIWAM, it's much the same only this time Aizen sees this very dangerous witness who is immune to his illusions but also extremely snart and capable young man and instead of risking being caught out by the one damn guy who can see right through him, opts to Curse Kaname into doing as Aizen says, and doing all the fucking work of this conspiracy against his will.

It's Not Nice, but Aizen genuinely thinks he's doing Kaname a favor by subjecting him to this degrading and incredibly painful servitude- I mean, Aizen's only other option was to Kill him to keep his silence, and isn't it wonderful that you get to help fix the universe? You're the one always going on about Justice, I don't understand why you didn't jump at the chance to mete out some Divine Justice.

An Excerpt from the captain's meeting in between the Massacre that made the visored and Zaraki's arrival, when Kaname realizes Yamamoto is 100% serious about his promotion to captain of the 9th and goes to throw up in the garden. Aizen offers to go check on him while Unohana very politely reads the general the riot act:

---

"You broke your toy Aizen." Kaname coughs.

"…I really am sorry for running you ragged like this. I really shouldn't have gotten so mad about you hiding the the hogyoku- it was very petty of me." The bastard sighs, taking off his glasses and rubbing his face, entirely genuine.

Kaname stayed on his hands and knees, weaving slightly as another wave of nausea flowed through him, powered by disgust and rage.

"How about this- I've got a lot coming up with the new job, training Gin and disposing of Kiganjo- So how about I promise to not give you any orders for a while? You will have to keep our arrangement a secret and not interfere, of course, but other than that, you're free to do as you please for- a year and a day is traditional isn't it? No, that's not going to heal by then- Oh, would you look at that!"

Kaname didn't have the strength to offer his usual rebuttal that he won't look at anything, ever. The sides of his head tingle like his skul was being pressed between two enormous hands made of static electricity.

"It's 11:11! Alright, I won't give you any Orders until 11:11 am on November 11th, 1911. That's easy to remember! What do you think?" Aizen continued cheerfully, patting his back and the Curse nails.

"…I can't." Kaname groaned. He could scream if he had the energy, but due to Aizen's Illusions, nobody would hear him. "I actually physically can't think. Please…"

"Of course! You really are such a help to me, it would be a shame to lose you. I'll even amend our contract, so you don't get paranoid-" There was a sizzling sound and a new stroke of hot pain up Kaname's spine as Aizen did something to the wretched Bakudo. "There. No compulsions for eleven years and a day. What do you say?"

Kaname grimaced, but dropped his head. Save the energy to fight another day. "…thank you, Aizen-sama."

"Good man! Let's get you on your feet." Aizen beamed, putting his glasses back on and offering him an arm.

---

He genuinely thinks that he's doing everyone a huge favor and if they don't get it it's because they're just not smart enough, but it's alright, He's a Benevolent God and they'll appreciate all his hard work the next time around :)

Aizen is a man who is FULL of joy. He loves what he does! He actively takes pleasure in it! And I think that's something that REALLY delivers in terms of sympathy AND horror for him. Who *Wouldn't* have a great time actually fixing the universe? He's a good man who enjoys doing good works, and this is the greatest work of all!

It also Delivers on the Horror when I get to write the deliciously fun scenes where Aizen is Elbows-deep in a novel War Crime and waxing poetic about how GREAT this is, or being confused why the people around him are reacting with fear. Don't you want to make everything better too?

[chalkrevelations]

Word of Honor Ep 6, and let’s talk a little about what’s canon, and what’s not, and about the particular slip-slidiness of the line between them on this show.

But first, due diligence: If you are NEW or JUST VISITING, this is a re-watch, so you’re going to find SPOILERS not just for this ep, but for the entire show. Scroll away and come back later if you haven’t seen all 36.5 eps and want to watch unspoiled. Also, heads-up, this got super long, because I had to talk about that stuff up there and then still talk about the ep. Hashtag long post (remorseful).

So, “canon,” as applied to fannish source material (in Western fandom, at least) traditionally has been considered the official stuff – the episode, the book, the comic, the movie – based on the religious definition of  “canon,” the collection of texts accepted as genuine and official within a religion. The word “fanon” – widely accepted fannish ideas – plays on this, as does the fandom concept of “word of God,” or things the Creators have said about the text but outside of it. Is it in the show as it aired or the book as it was printed? Canon. Is it not in the show as it aired or the book as it was printed? Not canon. (Apocrypha? Maybe. Anyway.) Generally, I think we’d say that things like material in the first draft of a script that doesn’t make it through revisions and onto the screen isn’t canon, even if you can get your hands on a copy of the first draft. The final product that airs is what’s canon. BUT this gets super slippery in something like WoH, in a way that’s exemplified in this episode. This ep is one of the places where people who can lip-read Chinese have spotted some significant dialogue changes between what the actors say on-screen and what lines have been dubbed in. (Everybody’s dubbed in cdramas, it’s just the thing that happens. You have your on-screen actors, and you have your voice actors. The ONLY person in The Untamed who did his own voice dubbing, for instance, was Ji Li, who played Nie Huaisang. All the other characters had voice actors dubbed in. In fact, the voice actor for Jiang Cheng in The Untamed is the voice actor for Wen Kexing in WoH.) One of the descriptions of WoH that I’ve heard is that this show was filmed as a bl and dubbed as a bromance. The thing is, nobody tried very hard to hide the shift. There are plenty of places that you can clearly see the actor’s mouths don’t match the dubbing, and they’re not artfully shot or edited to hide this. They’re fully on-screen, mouthing words that don’t match, right out in the open, almost like they want to you to pick up on it. Almost like it’s canon, because it’s right there on-screen, aired in the episode. In my first-watch reactions to Eps 36 and 37, I talked a lot about how the dubbing puts a layer of de-queered no-homo over what the on-screen actors are saying in these places, but if you can see what they’re actually saying and understand it, does that make it canon? What does it mean, both textually and meta-textually, if you can’t believe what you’re hearing – what you’re being told – because it contradicts what you’re seeing? How does that affect what we’re told about Our Protagonists and its “truth,” particularly in the final scenes? How much is the show deliberately working against censorship in this way? How much is it teaching us to look deeper than what we’re hearing on the surface?

Several people have talked about what’s actually being said by the on-screen actors in places where this happens, and I’m going to direct you to AvenueX on Youtube if you want a complete overview, because she’s reliable and has a good compilation that’s easy to find. She has a couple of videos called “Lip Reading for Sugar,” and the March 9, 2021, installment includes the Ep 6 incidences, the most significant of which are: At 3:05 in the ep, when WKX throws himself on Zhou Zishu’s back during the zombie Drug Men attack, calls him “mom,” asks ZZS to carry him, and tells “mom” that “your shoulder blades are the most beautiful.” Only no, Gong Jun didn’t say this, if you watch his mouth compared to the sound of the words. Instead of “niang” (mom), he says “Zhou Zishu.” Twice. “Zhou Zishu, carry me.” “Zhou Zishu, your shoulder blades are the most beautiful.” This is not only important because it emphasizes he’s gay for Zhou Zishu’s shoulder blades, but also because he’s fucking baked on Drunk Like A Dream incense when it happens, and later, ZZS will reveal that Drunk Like a Dream makes you see what you most desire, and he’ll confront WKX about how he “kept calling” someone’s name while he was under the influence of it. This makes no sense with the dubbing we get, because with “mom” dubbed over ZZS’s name here, WKX only calls Zhou Zishu’s real name once while he’s under the influence, at the end of ep 5. That is not kept calling. ANYWAY, once WKX clears his head and flies them away from the Drug Men, back to the a lakeside, there’s another disjunct at 5:05, when the dubbing has WKX tell ZZS not to play hero, that he doesn’t lose face if WKX helps him, and ZZS responds with something about your grandmother’s bear, which AvenueX tells me is a real Chinese idiom, although not for what. What Gong Jun and Zhang Zhehan appear to actually have said, though, is that WKX tells ZZS that this was just like a hero saving a beauty, with the implication that ZZS is the beauty, the damsel in distress, and ZZS respons that no, it’s like the beauty saving the hero, without a lick of concern that he’s the beauty, the damsel, in this scenario, just that he did all the work killing Drug Men and now this asshole is going to act like he’s the one who did the saving. At 31:24, dubbing has WKX telling ZZS that he’ll give ZZS whatever he wants if ZZS can get him some of the Drunk Like a Dream, but AvenueX tells me that he actually offers his body in exchange, in a way that implies marriage. And at 32:22, when ZZS asks WKX what he saw under the influence of the Drunk Like a Dream, the dubbing gives us some random story about baby WKX throwing a rat on his mother’s bed, while Gong Jun’s mouth seems to be saying something something about being in the bridal chamber with his beloved … so circling back to our first instance at 3:05, WKX using Zhou ZIshu’s name is now super-interesting, eh?

Another slip-slidey point of canon here is that there are two versions of this episode. The original version didn’t have the rabbit-washing scene. That was an extra that was inserted later into a Special Version ep when Youku reached 2 million subscribers. But the Special Version is now available on Youku’s channel (it’s the one I watched for this re-watch), AND it’s the regular version that’s on Netflix. So at 25:28, we now get this adorable little scene where ZZS and WKX are cleaning two rabbits in the lake before cooking them, and WKX splashes ZZS who pretends to be irritated before splashing WKX back and running away up the riverbank, chased by WKX. It’s flirty and playful and ALSO a foreshadowing of the flashback we’re going to see in a later ep, when they play together for an afternoon as children. Wasn’t canon before. Now it is.

Anyway, even with the (bad) dubbing that we get, this is a fantastic WenZhou ep. We open with them still being menaced by the zombies Drug Men, with a lot of swordwork by ZZS before he starts flagging because of his Nails Issue, whereupon WKX instantly sobers up, goes Evil Ghost Valley Master on Imposter Hanged Ghost who’s controlling the Drug Men, kills him with his Fan of Death, then scoops up ZZS and flies him off to a lake, where he attempts to tenderly check ZZS’s pulse and take care of his wounds before ZZS slaps away his hand like an offended maiden. WKX has to give him the qi smackdown in order to hold him still to :coff: pull down his robes and suck out the poison from the Drug Men scratches on the back of his shoulder. :hands: I remember the first time around, watching this with my mouth hanging open, demanding to know the heterosexual explanation for this. (Also, if you’re rummaging on Youtube, the Five Straight Guys Watching Word of Honor for this ep is not to be missed. They’re a little questionable in their reaction to the poison sucking, but before that, they’re a bunch of squeamish babies over using the dagger to further slice open the wounds to get to the poison, and it’s HILARIOUS. They can’t even look at the screen once the dagger comes out, hiding behind their hands. I love them, more and more as the eps go on, but they are WEAK compared to even the newbiest hurt/comfort fangirl.) There’s some more back and forth between WKX and ZZS about revealing their true selves to each other, no you, no YOU. WKX makes it clear that he knows there’s something really wrong with ZZS, and then they fight, set to romantic music, and ZZS ends up falling in the lake. I do the victory arms (  \o/  ) to myself where I’m sitting on the couch and startle one of the cats, because FINALLY we’re going to get rid of that execrable fake facial hair. ZZS fucks with WKX by staying underwater long enough that WKX panics and also dives in, we get some really cheap and awful underwater effects, and ZZS reveals his face! They end up back on the edge of the lake, drying their perfectly dry outer robes, while they sit around the fire together in their perfectly dry inner robes, but I am not going to complain because y’all. I CANNOT with how smug and pleased ZZS is for just a moment about WKX mooning over how pretty he is. Then he remembers to be an ill-tempered gremlin and pokes at WKX with a flaming stick, but I had to rewind four times just to catch that little moment of satisfaction about being admired again – it’s subtle and gorgeous and Zhang Zhehan is going to kill me with his face one of these days. ZZS demands dinner on this date, and fake-coughs pitifully to get WKX to go hunt something down, while he stays and does his delightful little thinky face as he pokes at the Soul Winding Box they got from Imposter Hanged Ghost. Then we get a shot of WKX looking at ZZS before he heads off to catch some rabbits that confirms he now knows he’s really Zhou Zishu, rather than Zhou Xu.

So, we’ll get back to the Ghost and the Box in a minute, but I do want to mention that this whole ep is layered through with mini-references and thematic stuff. Imposter Hanged Ghost rings his little bell to control his Drug Men, and remember that, we’ll see that again. WKX asks if ZZS came from the Healer’s Valley when ZZS offers him an antidote to the Drug Man poison; we learn later that WKX, himself, is the one who came from the Healer’s Valley. When ZZS gets the Soul Winding Box open and finds a piece of the Glazed Armor inside (Danyang’s, taken off of Ao Laizi by Ghost Valley before he was hung at the gate of Sanbai Manor), he gives it to WKX, tells him to throw it away if he doesn’t want it. WKX says he couldn’t possibly, and that he’ll wear it because it’s his first gift from A-Xu. Compare this to the way Xie’er will wear Awful Yifu’s Glazed Armor around his neck. We also see some of the thematic and referential stuff come up in conversations that form a repeated pattern in this ep of ZZS stressing what a bad and dangerous person he is: He scoffs at the idea he’s from Healer’s Valley, and asks if he looks like someone who practices medicine; WKX responds that he looked like a professional killer (true) who was cruel in the abandoned temple (presumably while escaping Mirror Lake) and frightening to a kind-hearted man like WKX who can’t even kill a chicken (particularly amusing given the prep for New Year’s dinner in a later ep, when WKX is the only one who CAN). At the lakeside and again after ZZS hightails it away from Sanbai Manor when they spot Han Ying there (HAN YING, my beloved), WKX asks if ZZS is a fugitive, what he’s hiding from, and says that he’ll protect him – by reason, because would he kill anyone unreasonably (omg, where to even begin? How many guys have you choked out at this point)? When they’re arguing about ZZS revealing his “true” face, ZZS warns that most people who’ve seen his real appearance are dead (probably true). WKX says he’s not afraid of death (not his own, at least, we’ll see that the thing he’s afraid of is ZZS’s death). ZZS warns WKX that he’s not only sharp-tongued, he’s ruthless (true). He tells WKX that he’s murdered many people (true) and set them on fire (not unlikely, frankly) and committed many crimes (true, in a way, although they were state-sanctioned, making them legal, if morally reprehensible). This is the ZZS who put the Nails in himself, who talks to himself about what a truly awful shixiong he is, who tells Prince Jin that he’s only good as a weapon. I like how we see this at the same time that we’re starting to see the side of him that’ll preen when someone thinks he’s pretty - this is a process, and it’s subtle, not as high-drama as WKX’s, but it’s there, nonetheless.

We also formally meet Xie Wang in this ep, artfully posed and playing his pipa among the bodies – old and new – of Zhao Coffin Home. He and Changing Ghost have a bit of a slapfight over whose fault it is that Imposter Hanged Ghost, who was actually Long-Tongued Ghost, got killed and got his (Danyang’s) Glazed Armor took by WKX, when Changing Ghost stole it from Ao Laizi, put it in the Soul Winding Box and gave it to Long-Tongued Ghost specifically to deliver it to Xie Wang. Xie Wang is super cool through all of this, and I think we get a sense of how deadly he is by the way Changing Ghost backs down. So, here’s what’s falling together: Some iteration of Ghost Valley is working with Xie Wang and the Scorpion Sect, giving the Scorpions access to the Soul Winding Threads, which we saw used at the Mirror Lake massacre and in the woods outside of Sanbai Manor to kill Yu Tianjie in the last ep. Via Xie Wang, Ghost Vally has access to use of the Drug Men, which we’ve seen at the Zhao Coffin Home (so far), although we haven’t yet been told (I think) how Xie Wang got access to the potions to create Drug Men (we also know ZZS read about Drug Men in a book somewhere, and got enough info to engineer an antidote to them). Xie Wang and the Scorpions have access to Drunk Like a Dream incense, which had to come from Prince Jin’s court, having been engineered by ZZS based on a much stronger formulation. Han Ying, from Tian Chuang in Prince Jin’s court, has been seen at Sanbai Manor, Zhao Jing’s place.

Meanwhile Chengling is doing poorly, with no appetite and getting bellowed at some more by Shen Shen, who would be the worst if only I didn’t know everything I know, which makes me cringe when Zhao Jing refers to Chengling as “my son, now.” NO. RUN, Goldbean. For some more thematic and referential stuff in this ep, WKX calls Chengling a “lonely chick with no one to rely on” and tsks over the fact that he’s “surrounded by hounds smarter than foxes” now that he’s under the care of the Five Lakes Alliance. This is clearly to manipulate ZZS into thinking Chengling is better off with ZZS, but it also sounds like an awfully apt description of Zhen Yan in Ghost Valley. I’m just sayin’.

[hankwritten]

TFComics Rewrite

I am currently plotting an outline for a TFComics, and I want to get my thoughts about fixes to canon and possibly get feedback. Since this is a rewrite there’s really no *spoilers* or anything, so I’m willing to answer all questions about what I plan to do. Also some characters I’m not so sure about how I want to retool them, so if your have ideas for your fav let me know!

Disclaimer:

This rewrite is intended to critique the content/choices made in the construction and telling of the Team Fortress 2 comic series. It is not a personal attack on the artists/writers/directors or any of the creatives that made contributions to this series, nor is it meant to substitute or replace the official release. This work is transformative in nature, and relies on an understanding of the source material to be understood. TF2 and its characters belong to Valve.

TFCR is working on the assumption that the audience has read the original comic, and as such will skip over scenes and plot points that are unchanged from the original. I don’t think it needs to be said, but this fanfiction will not make sense if you are not familiar with the source.

I also recognize that there are strengths within the comic’s writing and weaknesses within my own. Namely, that Valve writers are gods in the realm of comedy, and I’d rather not try to match them in the regard. As such, I will state up front that these will not be as funny as the TFComics. That is not to say there won’t be jokes (either ones transplanted from the source or some of my own) or that the tone of this will be terribly grimdark, only that my focus will be on improving story structure and character development as those are what appeal to me.

 The Broad Strokes

The goal of TFCR is to give a more engaging story for all the mercenaries we know and love, as--let’s face it--the TF2 mercs are side characters in their own damn story. These are some of the planned improvements.

There will be reason for each of the mercs to actually be there. As it stands, the motivations for almost every character besides Pauling and Saxton Hale are vague and unsatisfying. We’d usually say something along the lines of “money” for hired killers, but clearly Scout doesn’t even know if they’re getting paid, and some of the other characters are even worse. The hunt for the Australium is, therefore, boring. MacGuffins usually are, but at the very least the characters should care about the item even if the audience doesn’t. This work aims to give each of the nine mercs a motive and a reason to be in the story instead of just replaceable joke dispensers.

Explain what “Team Fortress” means, and how it relates to RED and BLU. Long and short: the nine mercenaries we see on the team are not from either RED or BLU but rotate between the two, and were the individuals selected to fight the robots. That means all things do happen to all characters. As Valve pretty much goes with “whatever is funniest at the time”, it’s very hard to make a cohesive theory about “where the hell is BLU team?”, but I’ll do my damndest. We’ll also examine Team Fortress’s relationship with the other capital T Teams, and why they’re considered the “rejects” of the bunch.

Comics 1 & 2 will be removed from the timeline as they serve no purpose, only taking what needs to be known about the plot’s setup and jumping straight to A Cold Day in Hell.

We will introduce the Classic Mercs right away so they can generate threat and play against the TF mercs when they do actually meet head to head.

We will not be killing off Gray Mann. (Not preemptively anyway.) In fact, there will be more focus on him and Olivia as villains facing off against the Admin, providing her foil as the TF2 and TFC mercs provide foils for each other.

I considered waiting until the final comic was out to begin working on this, but that may never happen. Jay Pinkerton said he may reveal what plot they had in store eventually, but considering it took Half Life over a decade to get the “I was once a Valve writer but my NDA has expired and now I can go buck wild” treatment, I’m not holding my breath. The main reason I wanted to do this is that the Administrator’s motivations are not interestingly foreshadowed, to the point where there aren’t even any good fan theories out there. That said, WritingDispenser and Riddle of the Sphinx helped come up with a pretty fun one, which was actually the inspiration for me to get off my butt and start plotting this.

There will be no queerbaiting. This refers both to HeavyMedic (which has been simultaneously used as wink wink nudge nudge joke many times and as encouragement for fans to play their stupid hat game) as well as lesbian Pauling (since femme lesbians are the preferred method for front facing LGBT representation across almost all media, but video games especially). If you need to understand why lesbian Pauling is an issue, Sarah Z coined the term “queercatching” in order to describe word of god confirmations on characters sexualities that are not followed up on in the text. I recommend the full video on it.

Due to the importance of immortality in the theming of the comics, respawn will not be a thing. Deaths we think should have happened previously will be explained as close calls, or that Medic can heal a short time after death. Medic and Scout’s deaths will be cut in the story itself, as after Sniper died and came back, them doing the same thing kinda lost their punch.

Scout

There will be no ScoutPauling hints. It doesn’t make sense to give screentime to this relationship because Valve obviously doesn’t think it’s going to go anywhere so why make Scout turn down advances from other hot women? I mean I get Expiration Date was a Thing but it feels like Scout’s whole motivation shouldn’t be reduced down to chasing a girl who doesn’t like him back.

He’s here because he lost his life’s savings in bad investments and needs the money. That’s it. Which is still somehow more than his canon motive which is question mark question mark question mark

He, Soldier, Spy, Demo, and Pyro all start the adventure with Miss Pauling.

Engages with Heavy on a genuine level when they go to collect him, Heavy doesn’t blow him off when he tries to level about dead dads.

There will be no DadSpy reveal. The way Spy treats Scout has never been “deadbeat dad feels bad about abandoning his kid” but more “this is someone I would kill without a second thought if I felt like it” which makes his reveal in comic 5 feel very disingenuous. I don’t think Valve even had this plotline in mind until comic 3, as #2 still has Spy seeming only to care about Scout’s Ma and not Scout himself. It also makes “seduce me!” retroactively weird.

Uhhh hooks up with Zhanna. This one isn’t critical I just think it’s funny.

Soldier

Soldier is going to be the Ur example of the Admin not treating her people well, as we’re going to lean into the whole “Soldier was only mildly messed up until the whole lead poisoning” thing.

He’s here because he’s blindingly loyal to the cause. He’s actually going to very little from canon because of this actually.

Might be the reason Team Fortress has a reputation of being the lower tiers of the Teams, but that doesn’t mean he’s damn good at his job. Fatal flaw is that he’s unstable, and even though the courthouse plotline won’t be in this fic, it should be noted that he actually does cause problems for the other protagonists due to his short temper. He’s a risky asset, but still essential.

There will be a minor explanation for the WAR! Comic, but I think that’s better saved for Demo’s analysis.

Pyro

Pyro is the character you could cut entirely from the comics and have the least change. Now, they’re going to be Pauling’s right hand. Let me explain.

Engineer and Pyro are implied to live together, and Pyro doesn’t have anything better to do than go with Engie after Team Fortress is disbanded. Rather than having a reveal, we will see some of what is going on with the Admin and friends early on, and see what leads up to her sending Miss P the note that kicks off the whole plot. However, while Engie needs to stay and look after her, Pyro’s skills aren’t useful here, and they are sent as a direct messenger to help Pauling.

They’re loyal, and unlike Soldier rarely mess up orders. They’re also partially mute, making them ideal for handling sensitive info. Pauling trusts them to handle the burning of “Elizabeth’s” paper trail.

Will be using they/them in the narrative voice, but other characters will refer to them as he/him. I considered going with it/its because that’s bubbled up in popularity again, but ultimately I decided against it.

We’ll get glimpses to their train of thought, but like the comics they will remain virtually silent.

Demo

Demo’s role in the cast is going to be very similar to Spy’s. The events of WAR! involved him nearly dying and Soldier taking the win, and he’s very bitter that after all those events *apparently* mercs can just be switched around teams willy nilly and don’t have to kill each other anymore. (As the audience, we know this is because the Admin found out the “make them so angry they won’t ask questions” wasn’t a long-term viable solution, and instead brought TFI forward as a neutral third party that was pretending to mediate the gravel wars.) But Demo’s suspicious, and is only along because he really has been miserable since he lost his job.

This conflict will eventually come to a head, more on that in the Sniper section.

Is fairly forgiving with his teammates. Doesn’t like Sniper but I’m willing to drop a little angst during that submarine scene. Is glad to see Medic actually. Here to be some glue to hold this merry band together.

The Eyelander will not be forgotten after 2 comics because I love this character concept and I think it was underutilized.

Drunk jokes will be kept to a minimum. What I liked about WAR! and Bombinomicon was that it took Demo and showed that they knew how to make him funny without making him one note, which they sort of did in the early TFComics but stopped in the later ones in favor of him….being asleep for the whole plot. I promise 100% awake Demo in my rewrite.

Demo likes Pauling on a personal level, but has trouble reconciling her with his feelings on TFI.

Doesn’t get knocked out by moonshine because. Seriously? Poisoning the Demoman with alcohol? In what world does that work.

Heavy

Not too much to change. Scout doesn’t accompany him when he goes to look for the secret Australium cache, and he engages with Mags and Saxton (which will be when the audience finds out what they’ve been up to) and actually cares about what’s going on with them. He thinks Darling is up to something. Which he is, he’s attempting to unseat both Gray and Helen due to long family history.

Will at least mention Medic. Their reunion falls a little flat since it mostly relies on Meet the Medic for context, as they don’t really interact in the comic. There can be a bit of a flashback to what it was like as all these mercs broke up.

I know uhhh Valve seems to think found family is really dumb, and that these murderers could ever like each other is silly or something, but the mercs do? Like each other? For the most part anyways. 

Bronislava and Yana come alone for adventures, not just Zhanna. Again, no real reason, but sometimes I get to have tacky fanfic stuff in my own fanfic because I Wanna.

Engineer

Engie ruminates on his family history of allowing all this bullshit to happen and just kind of shrugging. Basically Moss’s analysis of the Conagher themes.

Has put a lot of time, sweat, and tears into BLU and now TFI, isn’t willing to let it fall now, even if Admin is basically living on borrowed time. He’s doing this because of the ‘ole sunk cost fallacy.

Also we get to see more of Pauling and Admin’s relationship through his eyes.

Medic

Congrats on being the one merc with an actual arc, Medic! As a reward, you will not be changed much.

I’m actually going to use Medic’s section to say that the Classic mercs will be referred to by their first names in order to differentiate them, and we’ll get little previews of what they’re like from Medic’s perspective before we actually see them fight Team fortress. The battle at the submarine will be more of a fight in this sense, working it out so it seems like surrender is the only option after Sniper is killed.

Final fight with Cheavy will be...not blocked so awkwardly. I mean this is now a textual medium so my work is already halfway done, but still the pacing is so weird. Shudder.

Sniper

These are the big guns. Most changes, even more than Demo. He’s been actually hunting for New Zealand/the Australium cache on his own, and doesn’t want Pauling interfering, saying for a he knows she could have been the ones to kill his adoptive parents.

(She hasn’t, but the Admin did actually order them killed in an attempt to stop Sniper because she thought she could prevent the exact thing that is going on right now which is that Sniper is considering trying to get at it.)

Sniper doesn’t know this, but Pauling, Demo, and Spy eventually convince him to share his findings and help them get to New Zealand.

Spy

Similar to Demo but is less conflicted about it. He knows just because he likes someone doesn’t mean he won’t have to kill them later. 

Spy knows about who killed Sniper’s parents, and tells Demo, sort of as a test to see where his loyalties lie. He also knows that Pyro is Pauling’s confidant for certain things.

Demo questions him about what he’s doing here, whose side he’s really on. But you know. Spy is Spy and he was never really on anyone’s side but his own. When it comes down to it, it might be exactly as Scout thinks: that he’s ditched them all and run off when he had the opportunity. But, big damn hero, comes back in the end.

He’s here mainly to “keep an eye on things.” Also maybe because his gf asked him to keep an eye on her son :)

[stillness-in-green]

When MVA/MLA Arc gets animated, what will you be looking forward to the most? What (canon-compliant) additions and/or changed do you want or think Bones should make, if any?

There’s--a lot.  Does that surprise anyone?  There’s a lot.

o  I have been foaming at the mouth for voice actor announcements for almost a year now, particularly for Trumpet, Geten and RD.           Trumpet’s superpower is literally his voice!  I mean, nothing about that statement requires that voice be particularly entrancing, but it certainly seems like it should be, right??             Geten is a boku-type in the manga, but that was literally the only hint foreshadowing his pretty boy face through 21 solid chapters of Pure Feral Gremlin.  Everyone was shocked by Geten’s face reveal!  How do you maintain that surprise value with an actual voice actor in the mix?  Do you not even try?  Do you play up the disparity--in which direction?  I can’t wait to see what they do.           And Re-Destro!  Re-Destro requires so much range!  From his peppy, silly businessman persona, to the urbane commander, from the overeager yes-man to the raving zealot--who on earth do you get to believably cover all that ground?  I can’t even begin to guess, but I am living in anticipation of that article going up on ANN or the official Twitter sources.

o  I’m also much looking forward to getting official coloring on Trumpet and Geten.  Skeptic seems pretty straightforward--black, black, more black--and RD and Curious, we have color art for, but I wonder if Trumpet will also be all black clothes, to go with that dignified politician image of his, or if he’ll get some color to pep him up a little.  What color are those tinted shades of his?  His eyes?  The wicked-cool Sevens Loud?           I assume Geten is all wintery shades, but it’ll be great to confirm which ones.  I mean, we all assume he’s white-haired to better annoy Dabi with family parallels, but what if he turns out to be platinum blond?  And are his eyes blue?  Gray?  White?  What color is that awful parka?           Also, Re-Destro’s stress powers.  Having been writing them as black since at least August--Rorschach test blots are generally black, after all, and they’re the clear inspiration--I would much like it if the anime would have my back on this.  They made Destro’s mask a dark cinnamon brown, though, so I’m prepared to be unpleasantly surprised in this matter.

o  Predictable MLA adaptational choices aside, I’m also eager/anxious about how they’ll handle Spinner’s narration.  What I really hope is that they actually straight-up hand him ALL the narration duties--not just the stuff he dictates directly in the manga, but also e.g. the name and quirk explanation material that Present Mic normally gets, or the previews that are always handled by Deku.           The opening and closing sequences are another big structural thing, of course--based on the flashed snippets of Hawks and Endeavor in both our current and the previous OP, I’m expecting we’ll see at least a bit of something referencing the upcoming internship arc (which I expect to close out the season), but I hope the villains just walk away with the closing entirely.  I want my slice of life villainy ED, dangit.

o  Another thing I’m eager/anxious about would be Kotarou, and the Shimura flashback generally.  There’s a brittle edge of to Kotarou that I really love, and I hope he manages to keep it in the anime, despite the anime being generally not so great at moments that I would describe as “delicate.”  For example, I’d like it if he doesn’t get a super deep voice, and if they could manage to keep his pretty face, and capture how deeply bitter and tired he looks in the scene where he’s reading the letter Nana left him.           Also, I hope they keep the little montage bits and, crucially, the changes of clothes the family goes through.  We see Tenko in no less than five, possibly as many as seven, different T-shirts through the course of that flashback.  It seems like a small thing, but it’s one of the factors that makes me skeptical that AFO gave Tenko Decay, when so many days clearly go by between the opening with the man at the door and the tragic end.  It’d be nice not to see too much resurgence on that just because the anime can’t be bothered to come up with more than one outfit for the Shimuras.

I have enough issues with the anime’s usual adaptation choices that I’m trying not to get my hopes up too high on the actual content of the episodes.  The staff is diverting too much of its major talent to the movies (BAH) these days for me to expect the whole season to look all that great, and it’s never been particularly creative or daring outside of its climactic sakuga-heavy fight scenes anyway.  I’ve also long had a bone to pick with its scoring decisions, and am already eyeballing the climax of the RD/Shigaraki fight and imagining the minor-keyed terrifying dirge I fear the anime will play there, at the moment that Re-Destro (and, shortly afterward, Spinner) are supposed to be experiencing something akin to religious awakenings.           There’s also the issue of the violence and gore--judging by how the anime handled the scene where Shigaraki and Compress maim Overhaul, I have some severe reservations about how much blood they’ll be allowed to get away with, particularly in the scene where the League brutally decimates that CRC group and, of course, Shigaraki’s backstory.  I’m looking at MVA to serve as a preview for how all the same issues will be addressed in the War Arc.

That bit of pessimism aside, as to what I’m hoping they’ll add or change?  Well, off the top of my head.....

o  I would love to get a full episode devoted to the time the League spends fighting Machia.  Not that first tussle, but the six grueling weeks in the mountains.  There’s so much you could add there for character building and atmosphere that Hori didn’t so much as montage through.  Where was their food coming from?  How’d they pick out places to pitch camp?  How much access to news from outside did they have, and how frequently?  What were the circumstances in which Gigantomachia “told them himself” about his great sense of smell??  Stuff like that!             I don’t think we’re at all likely to get this--honestly, the series of late has had enough of a problem with trimming bits and pieces that I’m as worried about what they might cut as I am hyped about things they might add--but the one thing that gives me some hope is the training camp arc.  Specifically, the moment 1-A first gets to the Pussycats’ forest, they get jumped by earth golems, a fight that the manga off-panels entirely, but the anime spends a modest amount of time on, giving the kids a little bit of time to show off their moves and such.  I’d love to get something equivalent for the League.

o  On a similar note, I wouldn’t turn it down if they fleshed out some of those running street fights a bit.  One obvious thing comes to mind: there’s a weird jump in the manga between Skeptic and a horde of his golems being all but on top of Twice at the beginning of 233 and then that fight just--doesn’t happen.  There’s no mention of it at all.  I think the suggestion is that either Machia’s appearance or the tower going down interrupted it--Skeptic breaks off from his fight the same way Geten and Trumpet do theirs, shifting focus to protecting Re-Destro--but it’d be nice to see the anime touch on it.

o  It’d be nice to get a bit of expansion on the nature of the bullying Spinner endured.  We’re told he was, but was it limited to verbal?  Did he get beaten up a lot?  Was there an online element?  Deku’s our only other reference point for “bullied kid,” and whatever one might think about the story’s development of Bakugou’s mentality, it’s been made clear in retrospect that there was a lot more too that than just the matter of Deku’s quirklessness.  I’d love to know how Spinner’s bullying looked in comparison (not least because of some of the theories about Spinner and Deku needing to come to some kind of accord to free Shigaraki from AFO).

o  Make the Villa (both here and during the War Arc) look more realistic.  By which I mean, I know Horikoshi is capable of drawing interesting and lived-in interior spaces--he has an entire chapter dedicated to it in the 1-A dorm room contest, after all--but he normally doesn’t bother much with it.  At UA, it’s not too distracting, because we know good and well that that whole building is probably maintained by Cementoss anyway.  Ditto places like Tartarus (intentionally, dehumanizingly barren) or the League’s post-Kamino hideouts (abandoned homes and industrial spaces).  But the Villa?            For heaven’s sake, it’s called a mountain villa.  It has a clear reception desk on the ground floor; it’s obviously some sort of high-end hotel, if not an outright resort or rentable retreat lodge.  Speaking as someone who’s worked in one, places like that don’t look as fuckin’ bare as the rooms we see there always seem to.  For fanfic purposes, I’m happy to go on telling myself that e.g. the pool and the bar and the restaurant(s) and the gym are in the building Cementoss doesn’t tear in half, but it’d be nice if the anime could class the whole place up a little, maybe put some real furniture and decor in the rooms that are in use.  (Yes, I know this is a ridiculous nitpick.)

o  This is less a change and more a correction, but for fuck’s sake, BONES, give us white-haired Shigaraki.  The climax of Deika is a solid time for it, given that it’s obvious in the manga that Shigaraki’s hair gets paler in Deika--you can see it in the way Horikoshi inks it (which is to say, the way he stops inking it)!  I think if we ever get white-haired Shigaraki in the anime, a somewhat better time as far as narrative justification goes would be when Shigaraki gets out of the tube in the War Arc; you could easily justify it as a side-effect of the surgery.  Still, I’d rather see it here.  I want white-haired Shigaraki, gleaming and brilliant through the scattering ash in that crater, a veritable angel of sacred destruction.           Honestly, more than anything, the crater sequence is the one I hope I love.  It’s probably my favorite single moment in the entire manga, as Shigaraki wins over Re-Destro, Spinner and Gigantomachia in the same moment, and finally comes into his own.  If they can at least nail that, I’ll consider myself pretty satisfied.

[spicycreativity]

Fanfic Appreciation Week Day 7: A Place Where I Can Breathe

Yes, folks, I'm appreciating my own darn fanfic for the final day of Fanfic Appreciation Week because I worked really hard on it and it was a labor of love for/with one of my QPPs, my roommate, the man who got me into Sanders Sides: @\cadeorade-powercade (That's him in the aesthetic board)

Allow me to present the director's commentary for A Place Where I Can Breathe:

Content Warnings: All content warnings mentioned in the fic apply.

Chapter 1: I actually wrote this fairly late in the game. It's meant to serve as a prologue and orient the viewer in the universe, s opposed to staring on Chapter 2, which just throws the viewer in without context. I think it was a good choice, as it also allowed me to introduce the concept of the Sides having power focuses early on.

The Premise: Cade is a Virgil stan and he was getting frustrated looking for Virgil fic. He was finding a lot of stuff written without nuance by young authors, a sort of "by teenagers for teenagers" type deal. We are not teenagers, so we both have a hard time relating to that kind of teen angst fic, as we're not the target audience. So he asked me to write him a Virgil fic and we worked together to identify what plot he wanted, what the Mindscape looked like, and what quirks the Sides have. So a lot of this fic is quite gratuitous and self-indulgent

The Title: Lizzie McAlpine has a song called "Apple Pie" which includes the lyric "I've been running around trying to find a place where I can breathe." Apple Pie SCREAMS Moceit to me, and I had taken notice of the lyric and wanted to use it as the title for a Moceit fic. I didn't really have an idea beyond that, and when Cade asked me to write this fic, I realized it was actually perfect and summed up Virgil's inner struggle quite nicely. So cheers to "A Place Where I Can Breathe," the Moceit Fic That Wasn't

-Cade asked me specifically to include Virgil having a spider and I wrote nearly the whole fic without doing so, then had to go back and sprinkle some references in. I think I managed 2 total.

Chapter 2:

"Uh, how about I hold off on that until I actually see my room?" Virgil stared expectantly at Roman, who bounced on his toes. "Lead on, Macduff."

"That's not the line and you know it," Roman complained, but he turned to lead Virgil to his room. "It's ' lay on, Macduff,' and--"

-This fic was originally supposed to reach a climax with a confrontation between Remus and Roman, and "lay on, Macduff" would come back as a brick joke. Unfortunately, the original ending was a result of me getting tired and lazy, so I had to go back and fix it, and we lost the Roman-Remus confrontation.

It was hard for Virgil to not shudder at the sudden heat and weight on him. With his senses already open and taking in more information than his brain seemed to want to process, touch was an added stressor, more unwanted sensory input.

-Virgil being touch-averse is a direct shoutout to Cade, who is also touch-averse.

Roman had already transformed the living room: metallic streamers of purple and black stretched across the corners of the ceiling, and shiny balloons spelling out A-N-X-E-I-T-Y hovered above the TV.

-Upon first writing, Virgil had already given the upstairs crew his name, so the banner spelled out "VIRIGL" which is way funnier than "ANXEITY." But then his name reveal became a plot point so I had to go back and change it.

-Let! Virgil! Be! Mean!

-Virgil's line about hearing refrigerator noise when Roman talks is another shout-out to Cade, who has leveled that accusation at me

A small, cruel part of him protested at the idea that he would need special treatment and desperately wanted to throw it back in Patton's face. He wasn't a sweetheart, he wasn't a baby. He didn't need to crawl into a blanket fort with Dad just because he was a little stressed.

-Remus calls Janus "Janus Geminus" because I was tired and couldn't come up with a pun. "Geminus" is one of the Roman god Janus' epithets; another is "Pater" meaning "Father." That led to a conversation about Remus deliberately confusing Patton by calling Janus "Daddy," but I couldn't think of a clean way to fit the explanation into the narrative, so I stuck with "Geminus."

Chapter 3:

"There's nothing normal about that! " Roman stared in horror at the coffee massacre Virgil had orchestrated. What had once been a respectable (if not very tasty) cup of black coffee was now part of a 1:1 coffee to milk suspension, the liquid a tasteful shade of tan suitable for business casual trousers or a show-ready chihuahua.

-Cade is a certified Nightmare Man and came up with Virgil's horrifying coffee order after I asked him about it. Keep an eye out for Janus' equally horrifying coffee order later in the fic.

1) Shouts out the fact that Janus is canonically a Dostoevsky fan

Chapter 4:

Janus smiled at him. "Where reason fails, the Devil helps." He fussed with his gloves and straightened his capelet. "It's showtime."

-I fucking love Crime and Punishment. Look at me. Look at me. I fucking love Crime and Punishment. Janus' quoting Raskolnikov serves multiple purposes:

2) Lampshades the fact that Roman just conveniently happened to be alone in the living room, because I didn't want to waste time getting him there. That makes me, the author, the Devil

3) Foreshadows the impending disaster. When Raskolnikov says this line it is because he had planned to commit axe murder. The axe he was planning to steal had been moved, but he finds another, different axe to use. Raskolnikov messes up the murder and ends up killing an innocent witness in addition to his intended target. Janus messes up his manipulation attempt and ends up murdering Roman's self esteem

-I was going to include a reference to Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead (Remus' line "debauchery and vomit" was originally going to be "blood, love, and rhetoric") but I didn't because... Uh... Hm. Why didn't I do that. Maybe I just forgot about it???

-Roman is too stubborn to manipulate for long and that is a fact.

"I was pretty much done anyway," Remus said. "There's only so much debauchery and vomit you can fit into one story."

-Cade specifically ask me that nobody cry in this fic, but after I had Janus eviscerate Roman I knew he couldn't not cry a little. I kept it to a minimum because there's already a billion fucking fics about [literally any Side] crying on the shoulder of [literally any other Side] and it's really just not interesting to either of us.

-It didn't come up because it doesn't matter, but Thomas dreamed he was participating in the exact Dionysian orgy that took place in The Secret History because it's my fic and I said so.

Chapter 5:

He just sat back and watched and tugged at his hair while Janus spooned mound after mound of crisp white sugar into his mug and Virgil poured his customary eight fluid ounces of milk into his own mug.

-Cade strikes again. Virgil's coffee order is equal amounts milk to coffee; Janus' is equal parts sugar to coffee. He had asked me to include a scene where Roman catches Janus massacring his coffee and is appropriately horrified, but I uhh... Didn't write it. I still might include it as an omake someday.

-I imagine that Roman feels really strongly about dragons vs wyverns, and Remus just pretends to give a shit because he thinks it's funny to wind Roman up. Fortunately for me but unfortunately for my sense of realism in writing, I can't relate because I adore my sister and we get along perfectly almost 100% of the time.

"You shut us down every chance you get!" Remus said, baring his teeth. "How would you like it if your pens never wrote, hm? What would you do with all those thoughts in your head?"

-I do wish I had developed the concept of power focuses a bit more, established rules and such. Basically, Patton is always on the prowl for wrongthink and actively represses it, which in turn breaks or sabotages the Dark Sides' power focus.

Chapter 6: This chapter really should have been Janus and Roman but I was really tired and didn't want to bother with it. Plus, you know, Moceit. This chapter was meant to demonstrate how the characters would get along without Virgil nannying them. There's friction, but everyone is making a conscious, deliberate effort to get along because they love Virgil, and love is a series of choices you make.

I chose "Leo" as the answer for the answer to the crossword clue instead of "Virgo," because my other QPP is a Leo. She'll never read this fic, but I did it anyway because I love her. (Trivia: My sign is Virgo, so it was really a choice between shouting her out and shouting me out, and the last chapter is self-indulgent enough, thank you).

Chapter 7: I was gonna write a fic where all the Sides watched Cats the Musical because I was going through a phase. Then Cade requested this so I combined the two ideas. By this point I was fucking exhausted, and that's the only thing that saved you and the rest of the world from me writing the Sides riffing on the movie scene-by-scene. I could come up with snarky commentary for almost every, if not every single song from the movie.

Most notably, I cut a Patton-Remus interaction where Remus declares his love for Grizabella and Patton gets all staryy-eyed about Remus connecting with the idea of rising above rejection and being loved and accepted only for Remus to shoot him down and explain that he just likes that she got to die in a tire fire.

Other cut scenes include Janus quietly pretending not to go feral over Mister Mistoffelees, Patton full-on fucking sobbing over Grizabella and the kittens, and Logan experiencing a deep, soulful kinship with Munkustrap during Of The Awefull Battle of the Pekes and the Pollices (and henceforth introducing the phrase "like herding cats" into his regular vocabulary

[thejustmaiden]

I was watching random Inuyasha episodes and look what I came across! This is what Jaken thinks to himself at one point:

"I could've accompanied Lord Sesshomaru if I didn't have to babysit this child."

[Inuyasha Season 6 - Episode 149 "The Single Arrow of Chaos" @ 7:42 minute mark]

Guys, dads don't babysit their children. They just watch over them like normal parents do. If Jaken really viewed Rin as a daughter, then plain and simple he wouldn't have worded it like this.

Now maybe you can make an argument that he eventually does come to see her as a daughter, but what we have to also take into account here is that not only is this scene 6 seasons in but it's the penultimate season of Inuyasha (not counting The Final Act). If Jaken still doesn't picture Rin as a daughter after all that time and after everything they've endured together, then it's safe to say he never will. When you think about it, how much more can their relationship really develop when they're already more themselves with each other than they'll probably ever be?

So no, I don't buy that it's possible that how they both view each other suddenly does a 180° during the time off screen between the Final Act and this upcoming sequel. Same applies to Rin's relationship with Sesshomaru.

When nothing has alluded to or foreshadowed it in the slightest, then you cannot just make up an argument for argument's sake. The explanation must make actual sense if you hope to prove that these drastic progressions of both their respective relationships are legitimate.

As much as I'm sure some of you desperately want to hold onto the idea that Jaken being Rin's dad must somehow mean that Sesshomaru is her only option for a future husband- because let's just assume she wants or needs to be married for some reason living with a mentor like Kaede of all people okay- surely you can also understand why we think what you're suggesting is pretty far-fetched. The majority of sessrin shippers agree with us on this since they themselves say there were no romantic hints while she was a child. How we come to different conclusions later I have no idea. Well, that's not entirely true but I won't touch upon that in this blog.

I want to remind you that just because I don't agree with your logic doesn't mean you're wrong and that I'm right. I think I make a more sound argument, sure lol, but that's what having an opinion is all about. Just because Rin may very well be the mom doesn't mean it'll make sense or that this specific adult/grown child trope should continue to be normalized either. I will not support a dangerous dynamic, canon or no.

Okay, I'll leave it off there! If you haven't read it already, I wrote a blog here where I go into a lot more detail about why Jaken being called Rin's dad just isn't believable to me. Not only to antis, but to a lot of fans. Just because a couple of VAs said it doesn't make it true all of a sudden. They were also joking about Jaken being the mom, so who knows what to believe anymore. Besides, their recent comments can't just erase what he's always been to her if you follow the story correctly. Which I just demonstrated for you- case in point! Until I hear it out of Rumiko's mouth, I'm not taking anyone else's word for it. And quite honestly, even if she came out of nowhere with Jaken being like a dad to Rin for the sole purpose of validating Sessrin, I'd be hardcore side-eyeing her. Like "you sold out, didn't you? What a fucking shame."

Alrighty, thanks for reading! Be healthy and stay safe out there, everybody. 😊

[chooseyouovereveryone]

Brittana Analysis Part 2: Musical Choices (Smaller Parts in Songs)

Continuing on the Brittana Music Analysis. Part 1 focuses on all of their main songs, but thought it would be good to also mention some of the smaller ones too, their parts in group numbers etc.

So here goes:

Do You Wanna Touch and Touch a Touch a Touch a Touch Me refers to their sexual relationship, back in the days when Santana would only label it as so, and no feelings were allowed.

My Cup, the whole damn song. No explanation needed.

Light Up The World is one of the most meaningful smaller parts for me, because the lyrics are just perfect for them. Santana singing "you and me keep on dancing in the dark, it's been tearing me apart, never knowing what we are etc." is absolutely the Brittana relationship at that point in the series from her perspective. Then we have Brittany singing all about "throw your doubts away", while Artie takes the other line, showing the love triangle dynamic between the three of them. Since this is an original song, I head canon that Santana wrote this part of the song.

Run The World (Girls) is mainly a Brittany solo in line with her presidential campaign, but it's interesting to me that they have Santana sing the "you'll do anything for me" line. Since this song is about Brittany, it's likely Santana is meaning that about her, in that she's acknowledging Brittany will do anything for her. A nice touch because I already touched on in the previous post how Songbird shows Santana implying she'd give Brittany the world. It seems they are both mutual in that aspect.

Rumour Has It/Someone Like You sang in the aftermath of Santana finding out she's been outed, with Brittany and Santana both sharing such a powerful moment together in this song. The transition from Santana singing about finding a girl to her spinning around to look at this girl she's found is such a pivotal moment for them and really well done imo. You can clearly see Santana's fear during this performance, Brittany's too (she too is about to be consequentially outed but I feel her fear is more for Santana than for her own sake), but that moment they share is almost like Santana draws the strength from Brittany. The world is about to find out her secret, but in the same breath her "dreams came true" (as it says in the lyrics) and she's happy with Brittany, so maybe (just maybe) it will all be okay in the end. And guess what Santana? It was.

Constant Craving is mainly about Santana's journey to acceptance, but notice how Santana looks at Brittany when she sings "even through the darkest phase, be it thick or thin, always someone marches brave, here beneath my skin", as if Brittany's own bravery during those hard times gave Santana strength and courage. It's also plausible to say that Brittany was a "constant craving" for Santana.

The First Time implies that Santana felt deeper feelings from the first time she hooked up with Brittany, even though she couldn't accept that at the time. This is later backed up when she admits in 4x04 that she had feelings in Sophomore Year so right back in S1 when they potentially started sleeping together (if not before). While it's obvious what Santana is reflecting on since she sings about "the first time ever I lay with you", it's uncertain whether the flashback scene is from the first time they met or their first hook up, but regardless we see that instant attraction and spark between them from both the scene and the lyrics.

Take My Breath Away and Love You Like A Love Song; the prom songs. Take My Breath Away is pretty self explanatory because the whole song is a love song, and Santana makes sure to sing part of this to Brittany and they share a moment together. Love You Like A Love Song is even more poignant because it's a Santana solo, so it's likely she picked the song. She picked a song all about her girlfriend, but she made sure to pick a current song. That way, in true private Santana fashion, she could pass it off as it just being a crowd pleasing song that everyone loves at the moment. But she does make sure to turn to Brittany and sing to her "constantly, girl you play through my mind like a symphony". Hello lyric change from boy to girl as well, which Brittana always do in their songs with/about each other.

So Emotional while being a duet that symbolises the Pezberry friendship, both Santana and Rachel are singing to their respective partners. They both run over to them for the "I get so emotional baby" part, and although they turn to point at each other for the "every time I think of you" bit, I feel this was just for performance purposes. It's more realistic for Santana to be singing that about Britt, and likewise Rachel with Finn. Santana also points at Brittany for the "I keep your photograph beside my bed" and although we don't know if Santana actually does have a photo of Britt beside her bed, we know that Brittany definitely has one of Santana.

You Get What You Give is naturally an emotional number for them since Santana is having to leave Brittany behind when she should have been graduating with her. Santana runs over to Brittany for the "don't let go" part which could relate to their relationship and not letting go of that despite the obstacles and distance they are ultimately about to face. The "one dance left" part is also significant.

The Scientist has two meanings for me when it comes to Santana's lines when she's singing "Nobody said it was easy etc." in that nobody said that long distance relationships were easy, as well as nobody said that breaking up with Brittany was the easiest choice either. The mature choice, but not the easy one.

There Are Worse Things I Could Do is something Santana merely has to sing in character as Rizzo, but it's clear that she is thinking about Brittany when she sings "but to cry in front of you, that's the worst thing I could do". This off the back of Brittany telling Santana to think of something really emotional to get in character aka. them not being together anymore. It references how Santana could be the one putting on a tough front (Brittany being the one to be more expressive with her feelings in telling Santana how much she misses her and how she wants them to get back together), but deep down her feelings are evident. She clearly misses and loves Brittany, she's just trying her hardest not to show it, because once she gives in that to vulnerability she knows there's no way back.

Toxic the unholy trinity version was rehashed since it was a past performance of theirs, but contextually I do think about the fact they picked that particular number since it was a group song rather than them redoing a performance that just the three of them did. Since Santana is most probably the one who picks the song with it being her idea, it's telling to me that she picks to do a sexually charged routine with the lyrics "I'm addicted to you" etc. It's almost like she wanted to do this sort of routine with Brittany, but uses the guise of Quinn to make it more subtle. As it's also a song about falling for someone dangerously and "it's getting late to give you up", it foreshadows the temptation Santana encounters later when Brittany kisses her and lays everything on the line, even though Santana has a girlfriend. We later see she chooses Brittany, so this could link to the song.

Problem, well the "every time you touch me, and say you love me" line that they sing to each other is pretty self explanatory, but Brittany also sings "cause even though I shouldn't want it, I gotta have it, I want you" which could relate back to their earlier days when Brittany was the one chasing Santana, but could also have a double meaning of Brittany referring to Santana being the one who used to tell her she shouldn't want it, and almost teasing her with that. The playful manner in which they dance to this line, and the wink from Brittany, could be them showing us how far they've come in that the fear of "I shouldn't want it" was very much real for them both at one point, and now no longer is.

Home I think is really poignant for them because that whole performance takes them back to the beginning in their relationship in terms of Santana being homecoming royalty with Puck, and having to revisit all of that. I talk more about it here and how all their S6 scenes paralleled earlier scenes. In this song they sing "man oh man you're my best friend", which links to that whole "going back to the start thing" in showing how it all began, since best friends is how they started out. It's also how they've always remained throughout their relationship and even during their break up, and something they've always said to each other first and foremost, and I believe at times they said this when they weren't brave enough to say I love you (Santana in 2x22) or when they were restricted in saying it (4x13 when they clearly still loved each other but Brittany was with Sam).

You Learn/You've Got A Friend is actually one of my fav Glee performances, and I think the Brittana moment in this is super sweet and underrated. I always love how as soon as Santana walks in, Brittany gets straight up to join her and stand by her side. She can't get to her fast enough. Lyrically, their lines fit this because Santana sings "close your eyes and think of me, and soon I will be there" on her own, and it's almost as if Brittany was sitting and thinking about her since they are apart, but as she thought of her, Santana appeared. They then begin singing together about brightening up even the darkest nights for each other, something that I'm sure they've both done a lot of. The way they sing that line when they are reunited (not that I think they were apart for very long haha) is almost as if being around each other brightens up everything. The whole song is obviously about living, loving and learning, something they've definitely had experience of all 3 of, and they make reference to that in their gestures throughout the song.

At Last is one that I'm going to talk about since they picked it as their wedding song. It's also one that doesn't need much analysis. It was a very fitting song for them, because even though they got married young, their relationship was still very "at last", this is where we are. It took them so long to get there. Santana's denial, the love triangle with Artie, the grey area of not labelling things even though they were already acting like they were dating, the pain of Santana's outing, the long-distance, the break up, Sam, MIT, Dani, Santana being scared to get back with Brittany at first. But it's kinda like what Brittany says in their vows, she would have suffered it all just for the tiny chance of marrying Santana, and undoubtedly Santana would "1000 times yes" do the same. "At last the lonely days were gone", and they got their happy ending. I also really like the lyric "And life is like a song" because it could relate back to Songbird "and the songbirds are singing like they know the score". This on makes my heart happy, it was the perfect choice for them ❤️

Hey Ya! & last but not least I couldn't not talk about their other wedding song choice, Hey Ya! This is a pretty typical song to play at weddings, gets everyone up dancing, it's feel good etc. That's probably the reason that Brittany and Santana picked it (also fitting with what I said about them keeping private mushy moments to themselves and picking a more up beat first dance song that everyone can join in for the actual wedding). But the writers obviously picked it as a nod to Heather and Naya with it being their final episode, and to humour the Heya fandom.

& that's a wrap :) Might have missed some, but off the top of my head this is what I've got!

[gayregis]

I've listened to the part where Geralt talks with a very ill Cahir about Ciri and vengeance... it was one of the most emotional parts of the book by itself but also thanks to your take about the lost innocence of Ciri ! I felt it thrice hard in the feelings! Also, do you have thoughts on the declared love of Cahir for Ciri? Personally I see it as disturbingly romantic, let's say. Thank you for your commitment to the books and sorry to bother you

omg thank you for the ask. first of all i have to say you’re not bothering me!! tbh i have been loving getting asks because it gives me an opportunity to like bring more discussion to the witcher community... 

i feel like although reblogging pretty gifs of characters/landscapes from tw3 and any good fanart i can find is nice, my FAVORITE thing to do is write or read a really long textpost about the witcher books, i really like the discussion aspect of fandoms where people post their reactions and opinions to the content they like, because you get a bunch of shared reactions and differing opinions.

so no this is NOT a bother at all, and its nice especially to get asks about topics that i have strong feelings about but have not made posts about yet, like this one

ok, as for the actual topic: i hate forced heterosexuality, so you KNOW i hate that canon cahiri! it was out of line from sapkowski and imo, it came out of absolutely nowhere in tower of the swallow, it wasn’t something built up to or foreshadowed at all, so it felt not only weird in context but weird for sapkowski as an author.

my main problem with canon cahiri: i think it’s super creepy!

first of all, let’s discuss the age difference. cahir in baptism of fire is estimated to be “not over 25,” which i see as putting him around 20 to 25 years old, and i usually take the median of this which is around 23. while this “not over 25″ comment is said in the context of the hansa to remark upon how young cahir is (i believe it’s thought of by either geralt or dandelion, and geralt is around 60 years old and as a witcher he looks 45, and dandelion is 38 in tower of the swallow), and how cahir is described as a young man in time of contempt to illustrate that he has a sense of innocence to him as ciri cuts him down, his age gap with ciri is super innappropriate for anything to occur between them, since she is 10 or 11 during the massacre of cintra (as stated by geralt in something more), so she would be around 14 at thanedd, and 15-16 during baptism of fire to lady of the lake. so sapkowski deemed it fit to pair a 23 year old man with a 16 year old girl. this isn’t the first time he’s done something like this, what with essi being “not over 18″ and shani also bein around 18 / college age, and yennefer canonically looking around 20. listen, the man has some messed up values when it comes to women’s ages. we have to take it upon ourselves as people who like the not-weird parts of canon to understand how worldviews and personal biases affect one’s writing, and change it for ourselves to make it right so we can continue interacting with it, if we so choose (tldr: retcon some shit when it’s fucked up in canon).

now, before someone argues that “it’s fantasy medieval world, medieval relationships between men and women were just like that,” believe me, i am aware. i study ancient greece/rome and men who were in their 30s were most often paired with women in their teens as part of their arranged marriages. that is how their ancient societies functioned more than 2000 years ago. the issue is that this is a fantasy world, in which societal norms and laws do not have to conform to real-life earth history, and this is the work of a modern writer writing in the 1990s. it’s not “just how the times were,” it’s deliberately choosing to include an age gap like that to be something canonically acceptable by their society/ies.

also, one could argue that the age gap would be fine once they are older, like, when ciri becomes an adult she is already medievally-style betrothed to cahir so they start dating when she’s like 20 and he’s like 27. eh... that’s still an uncomfortable age gap, at least for when they’re in their 20s. people in their older 20s have more life experience than people in their younger 20s. but at least it wouldn’t land cahir in modern-day jail.

it’s still just an uncomfortably large age gap, and if you think about it, it’s even creepier considering that cahir met ciri when she was a helpless child around 10 - 11 and it just makes the bathing scene excruciatingly creepy too if you put it in the context that he eventually would fall in love with her. it even begins to not be about strictly age, but about life experience, development, and power imbalance within the relationship. i mean, he did literally kidnap her.

cahir in tos calls ciri a “woman” when she is like, 15 or 16 (with the rose tattoo) (to anyone reading, please don’t come at me with that “the age of consent is 15 in poland, just because it’s 18 in the US doesn’t mean your laws and culture apply to everyone” ... please do not try and justify this with laws, legality is not morality. only saying this because i’ve seen it in other posts). like.... hm! don’t like that! she is a teenager... he is in his 20s... this should not be occuring.

sorry for the loooong explanation, but every time someone brings up the subject of age gaps on tumblr it turns into crazy discourse with everyone trying to justify it.

but yeah, CANONICALLY cahir would have been 16-21 (median 18) when he met ciri at 10-11, and 20-25 (median 23) when he declares his love for her at 15-16. that’s ... not good ... to put it more into perspective, these are their ages on a traditional school system path: a 18 year old is a high school senior, an 11 year old is a 6th grader. a 23 year old has been out of college for 2 years, a 16 year old is a high school sophomore. ITS NOT GOOD

my other problem with canon cahiri: it’s boring and contradicts sapkowski at his own game.

all of the witcher is about taking fantasy tropes and inverting them, like you can’t have some random peasant kill a dragon, you’d need a professional, and also guess what, the dragon isn’t evil but a dad trying to protect his wife and child.

all of the characters in the hansa (as well as the four main characters of geralt, yennefer, ciri, and dandelion) are inversions of the tropes they represent. for some examples, milva’s trope is something like the hot action girl who only exists to be the only girl in the company and to be sexy eye candy. instead of falling into this, she is actually an action girl, not bothering with sexiness and appeal to the gaze of a male audience but a “get shit done” type, who also dresses and acts “like a man.” regis’ trope is all vampire tropes ever. he/vampires in the witcher doesn’t/don’t fall into any of the traditional european vampire myths like burning in sunlight, needing to drink blood to stay alive, being disdainful of humanity, having aversions to garlic, belonging to a super-secret orderful society that lurks in the shadows and controls everything like puppetmasters, etc... instead, he is the epitome of redemption arcs and overall “goody-goodiness,” understands humanity perfectly and does things out of his good nature. i already talk about regis too much, so i’ll quit it. 

cahir is an inversion of every knight trope ever, particularly the evil knight. he scars ciri’s memory as a night terror, but actually is not ... a bad person. he’s just some guy, pressured by his family and his society to do what he saw as an assignment like a college kid might see their final essay assignment posted on canvas. except you know. the final exam was to kidnap a girl. and he got an F on that and failed the course (ie got thrown in prison). ANYWAYS, cahir is meant to be this inversion of the knight tropes, so WHY, WHY, WHY make him become the knight trope of being the one to romance and to save a hapless princess? if we’ve learned anything about ciri, it’s that she’s the inversion of the princess trope! she KILLS PEOPLE. she ALMOST KILLED CAHIR. she can defend herself and kill for herself, she doesn’t need the knight trope going to protect her! 

heterosexual romance as the Big Reason and Motivation behind all of a character’s actions is tiring, annoying, boring, and not well-thought out. it’s so base and not unique, it doesn’t fit in with everything else about the witcher.

how i would fix it: not make them fall in love.

cahir already HAS a motivation to find ciri and to help her. he needs to APOLOGIZE. he needs to say, hey, i’m sorry i kidnapped you and ruined your life, i made peace with your dad, he doesn’t wanna kill me anymore, i can only hope that you can forgive me too after i SET THINGS RIGHT. 

as opposed to regis’s arc (i swear i am not playing favorites with regis, i just tend to compare and contrast regis and cahir’s redemptions because they are quite different yet they join the hansa side by side so they’re bound to be compared), cahir actually can find the one (not many) people he wronged, and set things right on his own accord, not go forth with a larger mission to assist all humanity, or whatever.

i think cahir also had this WONDERFULLY UNDERUTILIZED anti-imperialist message as part of his character that pains me to see being swept under the rug for some cheap lame romance story. sapkowski already created some anti-war sentiments with the battle of the bridge in baptism of fire, and he tried to create anti-racism sentiments throughout the book/at the end of lady of the lake. anti-imperialism fits with the rest of the saga as a message.

the fact that cahir was instructed by his family to hate the northern kingdoms, despite the fact that they were related to northerners, is really profound as something to happen to a character, and holds a lot of meaning in today’s society. the fact that he broke, finally, after he lost ciri, just completely lost his mind and had to be restrained because he was wailing so hard, because of the pressure that this society put him under to succeed and achieve pride for his family, is such a great example of the tragedies of society. then he speaks out against his leader and is jailed... and yet, after this, he gets to learn from his mistakes and redeem himself as a good person, and his character has developed SO much. he is not doing what his country wants him to do, he is not doing what his family wants him to do. he is doing what he wants to do because it is the RIGHT thing to do. that already is such a powerful message, he doesn’t need anymore character motivation!

so yep that’s my thoughts on why cahir is a good character asides from all that forced romance biz

[iaintyourbro]

idk if you’ve answered this before but what is ur interpretation of clouds line “do I get a say in all this?” / Aerith’s resolution.

Hey anon.

I can take this line a few ways. I’ll also go over what other people have said and why I don’t agree with it. 

First I’ll do what I don’t agree with: 

That Cloud said that because he already had fallen in love with her and wanted to confess this. Cloud in Remake is Cloud - there’s no meta, he isn’t like Sephiroth and Aerith where he seems to know things he shouldn’t - he’s just Cloud. Cloud is Cloud. What he says is not meant to be cryptic or weird. At the point this conversation takes place, Cloud has known her for less than three days. Three. Days. The first day he spent being annoyed half the time, telling her he wanted to go home, telling her he didn’t want to stop. He softens up to her when she talks about Zack (”The first guy I ever loved.”) You can take that as he didn’t feel like she was a “threat” or “thirsty” like Jessie was, or you can take that as he’s like okay now I want a chance. I don’t take it as I want a chance, because he doesn’t seem to pursue her. Especially after Tifa shows back up. Also, since he has one of his attacks when she says Zack, his subconscious may have told him to stop being a dick to her since it was Zack’s girl. So in this case, no, I do not think that line means, “I’ve already fallen in love with you and I want to tell you that.” Not even a little bit. 

I also don’t agree that this was simply fan service for CA fans. No, Aerith’s importance is way past what’s going on with her and Cloud. That resolution is designed as a foreshadowing playground regarding the OG story. She references her demise, Cloud’s persona issues, and even the Highwind Scene that is Cloud and Tifa’s “moment” towards the end of the game. So she references a major plot point - her demise. Cloud’s character arc - persona issue. Cloud’s love life - Highwind Scene. The plot, the protagonist, the protagonist’s romance. Not fan service. 

What are interesting theories that I’m a Maybe on:

Aerith feels bad about what happened in OG, so is trying to prevent it this time. The reason I’m iffy on this... Love is a really strong word to use for something that was so subtle that a lot of people never even picked up on it. I personally never saw any romance between Cloud and Aerith. They tried - and that was where it probably was like meh for me. They were trying to force that narrative to get you to be upset about what happens to Aerith. This probably worked for most people. Hence the ship wars... Cloud knew her for a month, while under severe mental distress, and there aren’t many forced interactions between them. (If they forced interactions like they are in Remake with Cloud and Tifa, this one would make slightly more sense), but gets shot to hell when the whole “Cloud was living in an illusionary world the first half of the game, by the way.” part.

Aerith was being arrogant and assuming that he already had. I think this one is somewhat comical, because to somebody who has no idea how the story of the OG goes or anything else about FFVII, this would come off as her being full of herself. However, as trolly as Aerith can be, I don’t really think she meant it that way. I do think she meant it to have an impact. A strong impact. Dropping the L word gives a strong impact. 

Theories I Like:

The Fourth Wall Break. Aerith is telling us not to fall in love with her as a morbid way of foreshadowing what her fate is. The devs even said, if you played OG, this would pull at your heartstrings because you know what’s going to happen to her. 

Cloud was frustrated that she kept speaking for him. A lot of times during Chapter 8, Cloud would tell her no and she’d just ignore him and do what she wanted. This is a basic response to something like “No, I want to say what I think.” This one seems basic since it has to do with Aerith, who definitely is the character with the most mystery. So I doubt it’s this, but it’s a basic explanation for Cloud being like wtf to her. 

He was thinking of Tifa. Now, I’m not saying this solely because I’m a Cloti shipper. I’ve seen some very convincing posts on this. I did go back and watch the scene again myself to verify what was going on and Cloud does look at the house a lot during that Resolution. Especially after she makes the love comment. So he, in his mind, already had an answer. All three resolutions are canon. Tifa’s takes place in the middle of Barret and Aerith’s. Cloud had already had his embrace with Tifa at this point. 

My favorite one: Of course that Cloud is thinking of Tifa.

The One I Lean Towards as Being Most Likely: Fourth Wall Break... it’s the least shippy of all the options. Aerith is the most mystical of all of the characters, she’d be able to do a successful Fourth Wall Break without ruining the story. 

Now, in Japanese, he says something along the lines of, “That’s awful one-sided” Not a direct translation, but he was pretty much saying that was a one-sided statement. you could take this the same way you could take “Do I get a say in this?” It’s a little harsher in Japanese, in my opinion. He’s calling her out on her shit for being one sided. In English it’s a bit of a softer blow where he replies with a question. 

[atsumus]

for the sleepover saturday: what are your thoughts on the hq time skip in general? :)

asdhfkjsdf thanks for this ask!! the answer got a bit long and obviously contains lots of spoilers for anime-only fans, so it’s under the cut!

General

Tbh, I think the whole timeline is a little confusing because of all the back and forth skips and flashbacks. I had to read it a second time and pay close attention to really figure it out, but I think I got it now.. So in 2015 the Karasuno 3rd years graduate from high school, Kageyama goes straight to V.League, Hinata prepares one year for Rio and actually goes abroad early 2016, meeting Oikawa there. Oikawa graduated 2013 and has been in Argentina ever since. In August 2016 Kageyama took part in the Rio Olympics, meaning he was in Rio too for a couple of weeks. The story is partly told from Yachi’s perpective in 2017. And then we skip to November 2018 for the Adlers vs. BJs game.

I really love all the knew hairstyles!!! They. all. look. so. good. My favourites are probably Kageyama and Miya Atsumu (I know that was to be expected, I admit haha). In general, they look all so grown up now asdhjaksfd and I really like that canonically they’re finally all older lol. When I got into Haikyuu I was fresh out of high school and only 17, so I could at least still kind of relate, but considering it’s already been 6 years for me and that i’m 23 now.... that was one of the reasons why I was less and less into it. Now that they’re pretty much my age, it feels better again haha

And I love that we saw (almost) everyone again and got to know what they pursued after high school! Besides all the ones who went pro (I love that Hyakuzawa acutally made it!!) I think i love Kenma’s future the most (Osamu’s is close second though). It’s funny and it’s suiting him so well!! And I’m really happy he and Hinata stayed friends! Where the fuck is Iwaizumi though????? And Tendou?????? And Kuroo??????? I NEED TO KNOW!!!

And I think Washijo and his wife are really cute, and I’m happy that he’s rooting for Hinata and that Hinata was able to show him that height does’t necessarily is a handicap.

I like that everyone who was friends in high school is shown to meet again or at least still be in touch now and then. It’s probably the most unrealistic thing ever because people don’t stay that well in touch after graduating and doing entirely different things in different cities etc., but it’s fan pleasing and I’m extremely thankful that we got that!!

And I love that everyone has kept their main traits (like for example Bokuto still being silly, Ushijima still being stoic, Sakusa still being a germaphobe and so on), but that they all grew up and got character development at the same time. Once again, everything is really well-written and I love all the new information and backstories we’re getting asdhjkasfjk

Also I love both the Adlers and the BJs! Very interesting teams with interesting players. I love the dynamic of the BJs, Atsumu somehow being the “team mom” and having to deal with all the others cracks me up so much and in general it’s hilarious to see them interact!! Also so! many! rivalries! Atsumu and Kageyama, Hinata and Kageyama, Hinata and Hoshiumi, Sakusa and Ushijima...

I like the twist that Karausno lost and never won an inter high. Of course I was sad to see them lose, but it just makes so much sense from the writer’s point of view, you know what I mean? It wouldn’t have been realistic for them to just win, especially not the first time. And it wouldn’t have made any sense to let them lose and then introduce new first years next year and start all over again, that would’ve been really anticlimactic. And like that we got to see everyone’s futures and get to see them play on an even bigger stage and most importantly, Haikyuu was always going to end with Hinata playing vs. Kageyama again, and the way it happened is pretty well written in my opinion. I still don’t entirely like that it made this turn, I really wasn’t prepared for it to end so soon, but it’s brilliant.

In in general, thinking about how Haikyuu is going to end extremely soon is breaking my heart. I do hope that after the Adlers vs. BJs game something else is still going to happen, but I kind of doubt it. I mean, it’s not going to be immediately over the moment the third set is over, but you I doubt there’ll be another game. Also Hinata probably has to win for this to make sense. Ahhh, I just really don’t want it to end!!! :(

I think the fact that he went to Rio to play beach volleyball suits him really well, and it was an extremely interesting plot twist! I loved how Hinata made friends with his new roommate, that was really cute, and of course, Hinata and Oikawa’s selfie!!! Such a piece of art haha. And as I already explained in another post, there are signs that Oikawa might actually be the one who texted it to Kageyama which makes this even funnier. And I totally loved how Kageyama showed the picture to Ushijima, the way he just grabbed his arm as if it was the most normal thing in the world. I’d love to think that they’ve kind of become friends by now since they’ve probably already been on the same team for quite a while.

Tanaka and Kiyoko got married!!!! I absolutely didn’t expect any relationship to become canon at all, so I was really surprised. I already liked that one scene when she let him carry her bag before the time skip and now this!!!! So cute, I like it

Kageyama and Ushijima giving autographs!!!! Just!!!!!

Kageyama

I never doubted that he’d become a pro and that he’d make the national team, but actually seeing it become canon really, really makes me happy! I’m so proud of him! He looks so happy! And he gets closure, if that makes sense? In high school Ushijima told him that he wouldn’t have been welcome at Shiratorizawa because his setting isn’t good enough for him, and now he’s setting for him! And he gets to play against Hinata on eye-level on such a huge stage, that’s pretty much what this whole story was aiming at from the beginning and we’re finally seeing it happen! And the whole king of the court metaphor, the one thing that scared him so much now being something he can be proud of, amazing. And not to forget his his weird curry commercial, it made me laugh so hard adhjkasflk

Also Kageyama is one of the two main characters and we had to wait 387 chapters for him to actually get a family and a full backstory like wtf??? I mean, his parents still don’t have names or faces, but at least we now know they exist and we got to know his sister (he has as sister ahsdasdjklaf) and his grandfather. I really, really loved that chapter. So many feels. I think it was told really well. And baby tobio is just so. damn. cute!

But it also really broke my heart.. parents that aren’t home much, a sister who is so much older she apparently moved out by the time he started high school, his grandfather (who he seemed to be closest to) died some time before he started high school, and to top it all off, it still looks a lot like he really didn’t have any friends and was mocked and all he really had was volleyball..

Also I love that it’s confirmed that Kageyama grew up with volleyball and had someone in the family who taught him. That’s always been one of my headcanons (and I know it’s been like this for a lot of other people too)

And Kageyama’s grandfather said so many nice and smart things. I love that Kageyama told him about Oikawa and that he was the one who told him they were rivals now. I love that he taught Kageyama to always take care of his nails and stuff like that. I love that he encouraged Kageyama to always be his best and not hold back and that he told him that people who are even more amazing will find him if he continues. I also love how he reacted when Kageyama’s sister said she was going to quit volleyball.

And I love the panel where Kageyama remembers that his grandfather told him that amazing people will find him and all the important players that are currently in the Adlers vs. BJs game are next to it AND OIKAWA, who isn’t even currently around (or is he??). Oikawa pretty much was the first amazing person that found him after all, I’m so glad that was aknowledged!

Oikawa

So he apparently went to Argentina very shortly after his high school graduation, so sometime in 2013. Right now in canon we already have November 2018. That means, if Oikawa really hasn’t come back to Japan in the meantime (we last saw him early 2016 when he met Hinata in Rio), he’s already abroad for more than five years!! That’s such a long time!

I’m not entirely sure I like that he went abroad tbh. I mean, it’s cool, it suits him, but if that means we’re not gonna see him again.... It was nice to see him again in Rio with Hinata, but I’d much rather see him play and interact again with lots of the others. I really want him to play against Ushijima and Kageyama again and also against Iwaizumi! I love that we got to see Oikawa happy and confident and all, and that definitely is some form of closure, but not the same kind of closure the other characters are currently getting.

But I absolutely adore that the person giving Oikawa advice all the way back somewhere in chapter 146 was in fact José Blanco. What a twist. Beautifully done. I already loved that scene so much, now it means even more to me. And an absolutely valid explanation for why he’d do something crazy like go to Argentina right after high school, so once again, extremely well-written!

Maybe it’s just wishful thinking, but I still have a little bit of hope left. The fact that he says to Hinata that he shouldn’t forget that he’s going to beat everyone and that the stage he’s going to play at hasn’t changed could be seen as some sort of foreshadowing. And of course also that Iwaizumi, who we haven’t seen again yet, declared that he will defeat Oikawa in the future. And that Oikawa said to Kageyama that it’s only one loss and one victory each, they stll have a score to settle. And that Oikawa never managed to defeat Ushijima. However, with the whole series aiming at Kageyama vs. Hinata, I sort of doubt there’ll be another match after Adlers vs. BJs, it unfortunately just doesn’t make much sense from the writer’s perspective... but we’ll see. I’ll continue to hope until the manga officially ends.

Miya Atsumu + Miya Osamu

So Atsumu apparently made the national team too! I would really, really, really love to see him and Kageyama play together ashdjasdjkf. But I’m also really, really happy that they’re playing against each other currently and that the sparks are still flying.

Also I just love the Miya twins so so sooooo much. And I love how their relationship turned out, especially considering that Osamu didn’t really trust Atsumu and was annoyed by him most of the time. Knowing that they’d go separate ways after high school could’ve meant two things, either they grow apart or their relationship gets better because they get more space and because they get to be more individual and pursue what makes them happy.

And I really love how happy they are with what they chose and how happy they are for each other! Osamu cheering Atsumu on and Atsumu being interested in the food Osamu makes. I don’t think we’ve ever seenOsamu watch a game before and actually look happy and excited. I love that they still hang out and talk and support each other.

[fanfoolishness]

Steven Universe: Future thoughts

Spoilers for the first four episodes below the jump!  All sorts of rambling ahead!  Please message me or reblog to share your thoughts, I wanna talk about it all!

I’ll try to organize things by episode.  I won’t be able to rewatch them until they go up on Apple TV so this is all off the cuff.  AHOY!

1x01 Little Homeschool

Steven has White, Blue and Yellow essences in his bathroom cupboard.  Maybe keep a bottle of your own spit just to be safe?  You never know? 

Aww Cherry Quartz is cute.  Did she actually get named? I assume that’s who that is.

I had thought that shot in the trailer was going to be Pink Smoky Quartz.   I was wrong, but then we DO get Pink Smoky Quartz next episode ahhhh!

We all know Steven drew that picture of himself and the Diamonds on the brochure.  

I like to think that Steven keeps up with his drawing during quiet times, and while he isn’t technically great, most 16-year-old artists aren’t great per se.  What’s important is that he keeps doing it and he’ll keep getting better!

Little Homeschool looks awesome and I want to go make some morps with Vidalia.  Wait, were Lapis and Peridot there? I don’t remember.  They should be!

I’m so glad Jasper isn’t the big bad!!! And I love that she’s just antisocial but not actively harming anyone (beetles and grass aside).  

Still no explanation for the blanket, I love it

STEVEN GO OFF, YOU TELL HER NOT TO HURT THAT BEETLE

Whoa Steven, that rage is juuuuust below the surface these days, isn’t it?  I get being annoyed at Jasper and I’m sure this isn’t the first time they’ve had this discussion but he really does just go off on her pretty damn quickly, and several times.

I am concerned that he referenced her corrupting herself.  I DON’T WANT CORRUPTED STEVEN Y’ALL, this better not be foreshadowing!!!!!

Honestly Jasper just needs to get into wrestling, I’m shocked Amethyst and Steven haven’t pointed this out to her

I’m dying at her attacking all the Earthlings in her little radius

Awww Steven, at first he’s really intrigued by Diamond Mode and wants to learn how to use it better.  So optimistic!

Except you totally killed about 10 conifers and only healed one, so way to hurt the forest dude

Am I the only one wondering how conflicted Dr. Maheswaren must feel, knowing Steven can heal all this crazy shit and that a) she’s toiling at doing it the old-fashioned way, b) he could really help her patients, and c) he isn’t?

Looking forward to seeing Steven and Jasper talk again, but I really hope it’s not because Steven’s been corrupted and is trying to get over it.  Urrrgh no ;_;

I do want to see if she has tips for how to control anger.  Or how to use it and learn from it.  But I’m not sure she knows either.

Steven is a shark.  Because if he’s not swimming, he’s sinking.  And swimming to him is helping people.  If he can’t do that, if he can’t do what he’s supposed to do in his mind, what is he doing?  He’s gonna sink this season and it’s gonna be FUCKING SPECTACULAR.

1x02 Guidance

Amethyst is so proud of herself!  It’s awesome!

Steven is clearly a little uncomfortable that he didn’t come up with the idea, isn’t he?  He also has a hard time figuring out that there are ways to use what you’re made for instead of having to run from it.  Of course, that isn’t true for everyone.  Little Larimar did love screams and children more than ice.  The best lesson is that people are different, some are comfortable working in a certain zone whereas others need to struggle past it to feel complete.

Amethyst was sitting in front of the Teens of Rage video game.  I FEEL THIS WILL BE SIGNIFICANT Y’ALL.

I’m just so glad Mr. Smiley finally isn’t understaffed. He could take a day off and go visit Mr. Frowny!

Uncle Andy is back!  Yay!  And he’s getting involved with Beach City in general, I’m really happy to see him putting down some roots.

Smoky Quartz is back!

PINK SMOKY HOLY SHIT LOOK AT THEM GO

Love love love the pink/purple asides for the Steven and Amethyst debate while being Smoky Quartz

TIME SLOWING/SUPER SPEED POWERS??? I WAS NOT PREPARED

The roller coaster exploded IN THE OCEAN I can’t EVEN

So far both Steven and Amethyst are intrigued and impressed by Diamond Mode, and sure, it seems harmless now... 

Steven is worried he’s losing his touch helping people.  That makes me worried that that’s part of a bigger feeling, not just this particular snafu.

Amethyst being so direct is often the one who gets closest to Steven talking about his feelings.  He started to go there, but then Little Larimar showed up again with their terrifying talk about screams....

1x03 Rose Buds

I’m really glad Greg and the Gems aren’t giving Steven shit about not wanting Rose to be looming over him in portrait form.  Now if y’all will also TALK to Steven about how he feels about it... but at least they’re okay with him removing the portrait.

HOOOOOOLY SHIT Y’ALL

I’m so happy J-10 and Y-6 are back!

OMFG they are NOT over Greg and it’s amazing

GAH-REG HOW COULD YOU

I’m glad the Zoomans are in control of their own destiny and able to go where they wish!  

no no no no no no no no no no we all know what’s coming here

Coming face to face with Rose Quartzes = instant KO for one Steven Universe

I almost had a panic attack with him as the Roses clustered around him and the music got tenser and tenser and the camera zoomed in on his face and that was fucking INTENSE PEOPLE

Greg seeing the Roses and just noping the fuck outta there, amazing, everyone in this family is so repressed

Poor Garnet and Pearl hiding in the bathroom

“Yeah, it’s weird”

Poor Rose Quartz-who-most-looks-like-our-Rose-Quartz, it’s clear she is much more emotionally in tune than the other two (due to her belly gem placement?)

STEVEN GOT NEW PAJAMAS

but let him sleep shirtless you cowards!

Also he just looked... so GROWNUP in that scene by the warp pad?  His proportions were just no longer little kidlike?  And he is still cutely beefy but not really little-kid chubby anymore and teen me would have had it BAD for him at this point, I’m just sayin’

Steven is S O O O O   S T R E S S E D   R I G H T   N O W

he’s eating his fucking blanket in an attempt to not talk about his problems I CAN’T

also HAVE WE NOTICED that Steven will eventually end up telling strangers at least some of what’s bothering him, but never the people who actually love and care about him

this episode was so damn tense it is masterful

I’m glad they managed to talk things out a little

but clearly Steven is still, as always, just scratching the surface, this poor kid just needs to GO OFF.

did he go pink in this one from stress for a second?  Or was that the next one? 

1x04 Volleyball

You cannot tell me that that white coat is not a hand-me-down from Dr. Maheswaren, it is CANON IN MY MIND

also damn how many Gems are cracking themselves right and left that this needs to happen regularly?

seriously though Steven, you might just want to get a spittoon and start sending one to every hospital ever, you would undo A LOT of human suffering....

Steven honey I’m so sorry your mom did you so wrong and I’m so sorry you’re so scared of everything to do with her and NONE OF IT IS YOUR FAULT OKAY

but maybe also you need to learn how to face some of this stuff so it doesn’t scare you so badly

Poor Pink Pearl!

Volleyball? Seriously Steven? so insensitive how do you know Pink didn’t throw a volleyball at her head

Poor Pearl and Volleyball feeling so jealous about each other

Volleyball is 8000 years old??  damn how old was Pink?

oooooooh the Reef!  so cool and mysterious!  Look at all those Pearl possibilities!

So Pink damaged her Pearl, and she sent her to the Reef for repair.  They fixed her gem, but when she reformed, the trauma was still so severe that she reformed with the crack.  Oh man :(

Now again I don’t want Corrupted Steven but you could probably wrangle that into support for the theory.

I prefer to think that Steven will do something different than straight-up Corruption to himself, but we could see something like the crack form instead of Corruption.

Willing himself into a monster form only works if he thinks of himself completely as a monster.  Right now he thinks Pink is the monster, and he thinks, finally, that he isn’t Pink.  So either he’d have to really hurt somebody and then view himself as a monster, or, my preference, he would develop something like a scar or pink eyes or stay pink all the time or something until he’s figured out his issues.

I JUST DON’T WANT HIM TO HAVE HORNS, YOU GUYS.

Pearl WAS protecting Volleyball from Steven oh NOOOOO

STEVEN SONIC SCREAM

So we’ve got Diamond Mode Strength, Super Speed, and Sonic Scream, man oh man oh man

this finally makes sense because all the other Diamonds have such well-developed offensive powers

Pink must have been like “no those are dangerous I don’t want them, what else can I do” and developed her healing powers secretly

I always wondered why the Diamonds never recognized Rose Quartz’s healing tears or shield as belonging to Pink

And it must be that she never showed it to them

They maybe only knew about her offensive powers

MEGA PEARL IS SO BEAUTIFUL AND WISE AND HER RIBBON DANCING IS SO MAGNIFICENT AND I LOVE THEM JUST TAKE CARE OF EACH OTHER YOU TWO

I can’t believe we got a new fusion so quickly!!!!

Fuck that bitch Shell amirite

look, someone help Steven.

Please help Steven.

HELP. STEVEN.

No new trailer for next week???? COWARDS

omg someone please please scream about all this with me

[myevilmouse]

In Defense of The Rise of Skywalker

Or...how I learned to stop hating and enjoy a movie

Spoilers and random thoughts below the cut.

I hate the abomination that was/is The Last Jedi.  Let’s get that out of the way.  I’ve already explained the hundreds of reasons why, the biggest and most unforgivable being the character assassination of Luke “I call him Jake” Skywalker and the invalidation of every victory of the OT.  I resent this making people lump me into a “gatekeeper” sect, or accuse me of racism (Rose was annoying and ruined Finn’s heroism, jeopardizing hundreds of lives for her own selfish reasons without building up a convincing romance and blah blah etc).  It has nothing to do with her gender, race, or anything.  It has to do with poor character development and inconsistent motivations/messages. 

I’m also not a huge fan of The Force Awakens, mainly for its lack of originality and the treatment of Han/Leia, but otherwise I thought it was OK.  I liked Finn, wanted him to become a Jedi, found Poe to be a worthy heir to our antihero mold.  Rey left me indifferent and Kylo Ren was a temper-tantrum throwing teenager, but anyway...

Let’s keep that as background/context and not get bogged down.

Since they announced the title of this movie, I have been livid with rage. How dare they use my man’s name to sell their disgusting imitation of a beloved universe?  I was certain, ever since it was announced, that Rey would take Luke’s surname, despite having treated him so horribly in TLJ, despite having done nothing to earn it, despite having spent far more time with Leia, so if anything a Solo/Organa family name would make more sense.  It was just to sell tickets and I was furious.

I read all the spoilers.  Worst fears:  confirmed.  I looked at leaked photos.  I raged over the inanity of the plot and the sad conclusion to the Skywalker Saga, which in my mind will always end with ROTJ.

Still, I love Mark Hamill, and I decided to treat this film as a MH film. The completist in me required theatrical viewing.  Rare to get our man in a cinematic release.  So I went, ready to hate watch, prepared to dull the bitterness and betrayal with wine.

But….JJ Abrams directed a fix it fic.  And it’s good.  This film not just address the real injustices and horrible story decisions of TLJ, but also addresses some of the major problems of TFA too. 

I tried to go in with an open mind, but obviously I had many preconceived notions, and already knew almost every single story point and character beat.  I was ready to roll around in my hate and slam the abomination.  I want to emphasize that I am one of those people that was COMPLETELY prepared to hate EVERYTHING about this.

There are flaws. 

But there is so much that is great. 

I really really liked it. 

No one is more shocked than I at my own reaction.  I was ready/willing/wanting/primed to hate everything about this.  Please keep that in mind.  Hahah and no one is paying me to write this post 😉

I decided to write this because I also read all the negative critical reviews online from the pro critics yelling FAN SERVICE.  And I’m like…damn straight?  Ever since George Lucas made Han shoot second, fandom has understood that we understand this franchise better than film executives.  We aren’t concerned with adding an extra dewback or improving special effects.  We love these films the way we first experienced them, and they cannot and should not be “improved” to the ultimate detriment of the brand.

I’m here to tell you that the critics are not being fair.  The spoilers on reddit were true, but the movie works. Let’s accept, before we go further, that Abrams couldn’t entirely rewrite the mess that he stepped into/helped create. So I can’t defend the fact that Finn isn’t a Jedi yet or the mess that is the new Rebellion/failure of the old. I, like many fans, wish we had been given a different/better story from the beginning.  Sadly, we were not.

That is something we don’t have to accept (I certainly don’t consider these films “canon” in my mind—Mara Jade forever!) but let’s approach this film in the spirit it seems to be intended:  An attempt to address the very valid criticisms loudly voiced about the others in the trilogy, with the caveat that we are stuck with TFA and TLJ no matter how much we hate them.

First, the music is amazing, as we all knew it would be.  The acting is stellar.

Some of the things Abrams “fixed:”

“Rey is perfect/Mary Sue/good at everything”.  There is a conscious effort in this film to show her training, with Leia as her Master.  There is a good scene foreshadowing her final struggle, where she strains to hear the voices of Jedi past and fails.  There are several signs that she is not a Jedi yet, including how Palpatine talks about her, and perhaps my favorite, when she tells Leia she hasn’t earned Luke’s lightsaber.

Me: Damn straight you haven’t.

And Leia AGREES, keeping Luke’s weapon because Rey isn’t ready for it. She’s still learning.

Further proof of her non-Jedi status, when Rey is killed, she doesn’t join the Force.  She is a corpse.  On the other hand, Ben Solo, once redeemed, disappears as we would expect a good Jedi to do.  A clear distinction between the two of them.

And speaking of Leia:

Leia’s character:  TFA and TLJ Leia is weak and sends other people to fight, whereas our brave Princess from the OT is volunteering for suicide missions, grabbing weapons from the hands of her rescuers, and running into danger for a good cause.  It always bothered me that she didn’t go after Kylo herself (or with Han).  In this, we see her as a Jedi Master, training Rey, with her own lightsaber.  Leia is once more a badass, true to her character.  A legitimate Jedi who also joins the Force (although not sure why it took her so long post-mortem, that was weird).

Luke’s character:  Hello, I am A LUKE FANATIC.  The biggest sin of TFA and especially TLJ was this idea of Luke hiding out and becoming the disgusting, pessimistic coward he was shown to be.  Abrams ignores this pretty much entirely, starting with the revelation that Luke was actually going on missions with Lando to hunt for a Sith artifact to help the Rebellion.  Luke kept notes, he was busy and ACTIVE.  He wasn’t giving up; he was leaving a trail to help anyone who followed.  The best ‘fuck you’ in the whole movie was Luke catching Anakin’s lightsaber when Rey throws it away.  The ultimate rejection of his TLJ characterization.  

Luke’s conversation with Rey echoes very much the ROTJ “you must confront Vader” conversation.  There are many echoes of ROTJ but given the restrictions on what we are working with, I accepted this parallel.  Much like Luke had to face his unfortunate inheritance, so must Rey.  It’s not terribly original, but these films aren’t.

I also loved the simple line “I was wrong” when Rey asks why he did what he did in TLJ.  This to me is simply “Rian Johnson was wrong/The Last Jedi was wrong.”  There is no excuse that is acceptable, but this is a filmmaker acknowledging an injustice, and I appreciated it.  (Did I mention these films are not canon for me? They aren’t, just giving credit for this attempt.)

Han’s character:  I hated SO MUCH how they turned Han into a failure in TFA.  A buffoon, not even a good smuggler anymore, a failure as a father, a husband.  When I heard he was going to be in this I was like HUH?  But this “memory” of his father that Kylo Ren sees after Rey heals him and departs, after he’s lost his mother, is another attempt to redeem the injustice to Han’s character.  Han is the one in the movie who brings Kylo Ren back to the Light, not Rey.  It is a very short scene, but effective.  The acting is poignant, with the “Dad” working for me.  Maybe I’m a softie.  But I appreciated this brief proof that Han Solo, in the end, didn’t suck as a father, and ultimately, even as a hallucination, inspired the love that saved his son.

Chewbacca got a medal:  I said Abrams was fixing things in the sequels, but I admit I was choked up to see this fixit from A New Hope.  Finally Chewie gets the medal he is LONG overdue.

Team dynamic with the new characters:  Finally we understand why these people care about each other.  They go on shared adventures, they have banter (and some good jokes, not the stupid bathos of TLJ), and there is finally some sense of camaraderie that was discarded in TLJ.  There are several references to Rey’s “new family,” clearly referring to this band of Rebels, and it was far more compelling than in earlier films.

Finn’s Force Sensitivity:  I, like many, desperately wanted Finn to be a Jedi.  Since TFA, it seemed inevitable!  I loved how he used the lightsaber, how he seemed to have Force abilities (that were never really explored).  TLJ ignored that potential completely, sidelining him on that stupid Canto Bight quest and pulling him away from Rey.  There are so many signs that he is destined to be a Jedi in this film, I was thrilled to see them.  Knowing things without explanation, doing amazing things, sensing things, trusting his feelings, it’s another ‘fuck you’ in my opinion, to RJ for ignoring this former stormtrooper’s destiny in favor of overblown set pieces and pointless CGI theatrics.  When he says, towards the end “I can feel it,” I wanted to fist pump.  YOU GO BE A JEDI FINN!  THE FORCE IS WITH YOU.  Personally, I would have loved for Finn to be the main protagonist of all three films, but I appreciate us getting what we got, since we can’t get what we want.

Stuff that worked:

The Wedge cameo:  Yeah.

Lando:  Wonderful. His dialogue, especially at the beginning, does a lot to fix our view of Luke.

Kylo’s redemption:  See above re: Han.  I’ve seen a lot of criticism about the kiss.  I get the whole “female character’s purpose is to validate the evolution of the male” criticism, but I want to point out a couple things about this. First of all, it’s not a “Reylo” kiss. Kylo is gone.  This is well after Kylo is redeemed.  He’s been of the Light for a while before this, it’s clearly Ben at this point.  It’s also obvious Rey knows that, and like Luke forgave Vader for his abuse, she forgives Ben Solo for his.  So I understand also the criticism that is making people puke about Rey kissing her abuser, but again, Luke sheds tears for the father he loves, who maimed and traumatized him.  Star Wars is about redemption and forgiveness that accompanies it, and I don’t have the same issue with this.  If she kissed KYLO without him being redeemed before he died, for example, I would be disgusted.  This is not that.

The cinematography/pacing/story:  So many critics and the spoilers made it sound like this was a convoluted mess.  I went to see it with a non-native English speaker and neither of us had any trouble following the plot.  Yeah, a lot happens, but it all is linear and consistent within the film.

The humor/dialogue:  Felt way more Star Wars-y and better placed than the last two films.

The Jedi Helping Rey:  As much as I thought I would hate this, it was really well done, largely, I think, due to the foreshadowing during her earlier training.  When Palpatine says all the Sith live in him and we know what she’s gonna say but it still works SO WELL.  I was rooting for her and I’ve never been a huge fan.  But at that climactic moment, I was a believer.

Major flaws

Of course there are some.  For me the most major:

A Jedi Strikes Not In Anger: In every single lightsaber battle (pretty sure, I only saw the film once), Rey is the first to strike.  She always seems to be fighting from anger and with negative emotion.  This is not at all Jedi-esque and I found it particularly jarring in her duels with Kylo Ren.  This bothered me more than almost anything else in the film because it is never addressed.  She fights ANGRY and she fights FEARFUL and then somehow when she’s supposed to strike down Palpatine, she has it in her to resist.  This, above all else, makes me not like her as the “heir to the Jedi”.  I thought it was a real problem, and makes her ultimate evolution at the finale less convincing.

Rey Skywalker:  I get why they did it, but I stand by my earlier thoughts regarding taking the Solo or Organa name.  I have nothing against adopted families.  And I found it SLIGHTLY more palpable because since the Emperor refers to Ben as “the last Skywalker” and then since he transfers his entire life force into her, you can argue that she has “Skywalker” literally in her spirit now.  OK fine.  But I still don’t really think she earned it.  She came CLOSER than I thought she would and I didn’t ultimately want to burn down the cinema as I expected I would want to.

Force Resurrection:  No. Just no.  This changes so much and makes so much of the earlier films moot. Why wouldn’t Anakin just resurrect Padme?  Don’t get me started.

Other random new Force things:  Like Force Ghosts touching shit.  Yeah I know Obi Wan sat on the tree in Dagobah, I know, but we keep learning new and more powerful Force shit each film.  Teleportation of objects (that lightsaber?!), astral projection, rapid healing, and now playing catch with your ghost friends.  I get they are important to the story but it feels lazy.  But my exception here was Luke catching the saber because FUCK YOU RJ. 😊

Redemption=Death:  I wanted Kylo Ren to die for his sins too, but I recognize this strange thing we have going on in the GFFA that if a baddie goes good they die.  It’s the equivalent of the horror movie “fuck and the killer gets you” trope.  I didn’t necessarily mind Ben dying, but it seemed … lazy.

The final shot:  It was a mistake to even touch this iconic moment.  It wasn’t earned.  Make your own legend/iconic moment and leave my farmboy his.

Something no one can fix:  The sucky destinies of Luke Jake, Han, and Leia.  They didn’t live happy lives, they didn’t see the end of tyranny, they all died with only the hope of success.  I will never forgive the attempted destruction of the legacy of the OT (attempted cause it’s still how it all ends in my world), this disregard of the triumph of the Rebellion over the Empire, and I will never believe that the New Republic failed so completely and miserably.  Bring on the EU/Legends and forget this shit.

Final thought:  I went to this expecting the cinematic equivalent of a back alley abortion and instead I got what felt like an apology.  An entertaining and polished and sincere apology.  We deserved better, and I think the people who made this film realized that and did their best.  TROS had to wrap up something that was divisive and imperfect and misguided, and tried as hard as it could, in my opinion, given what they were working with.

It was a good movie.  Ambitious, with flaws, but I am glad I saw it, and I hope you will be too. <3  May the Force be with you.

[jbuffyangel]

Bigger Than The Friggin Universe: Arrow 7x22 Review (You Have Saved This City)

This one was hard to write. 

Goodbyes are always difficult, but when it’s goodbye to someone or something you love it’s particularly hard. I love Felicity Smoak. I love Olicity. I know you do as well. They are the reason we watch. Arrow delivered a spectacular season finale that felt like a series finale and it will be for some of you. 

Most importantly, they paid tribute to the character and love story that changed the show forever. Buckle up my friends and bring the tissues. This will be a long one. Felicity Smoak and Emily Bett Rickards deserve no less.

Let’s dig in…

Olicity, Original Team Arrow, Flash Forwards, and the Glorious Felicity Smoak

Changing up the format because this is going be a big smorgasbord of feels. I can’t think in sections because the writers just dropped kicked my heart into oblivion.

It’s all about the last twenty minutes right? Right. So let’s get to it. Honestly, I revved myself up for this episode. I was ready to go.

As if pure commitment to power through could protect me from the painful onslaught of emotions Stephen Amell and Emily Bett Rickards were about to bestow upon my soul. 

I was a fool. Nothing could prepare me for the last twenty minutes.

But then “You Have Saved This City” started moving fast. Like really fast. I blinked and we had blown through 35 minutes. I barely knew what happened! Oliver saved the city... I guess? 

It’s amusing we focused on this single goal for so long and once achieved it felt kind of... perfunctory. 

Saving the Star City was a plot point we were just waiting for the writers to pull the friggin trigger on and we knew they never would until the end. 

Arrow is a lot of things, but there’s never a lack of action in the series finale. It’s often incredibly frustrating because hugely important Olicity scenes are regulated to less than five minutes because ACTION.

“You Have Saved This City” was different. It felt like the writers were rushing through the episode to get to the Olicity scenes. They breezed past Oliver beating Emiko and The Ninth Circle. Those ungrateful twats known as the Star City Police Department and their equally annoying cohorts the citizens of Star City finally figured out Oliver is a good guy. The scene they pieced it all together though took less than three minutes. 

The writers wanted to focus on the emotional beats of the story because this was really their last chance to do so. Go big or go home. Fine with me.

It was great, but I started to panic. REALLY PANIC. The episode was moving waaaaaay too fast. This meant I had to say goodbye soon to a character I adore and a love story I have spent obscene amounts of time writing about. I wasn’t ready, but I was never going to be.

Oliver and Felicity tell the team they are going to leave Star City for a little while. The fact the city is safe and under the team’s protection is the reason they feel like they can leave. 

Source:  littlegirlinvisible

True, but also some nutcase from the Ninth Circle named Beatrice is still gunning for them. Who the fuck is Beatrice? Eh. Forget it. I don’t care.

The team ends the way it began with Oliver, Felicity and Diggle.  

Source: @plotbunnyshipper

Even though Original Team Arrow doesn’t get the focus and screen time we crave, they are and will always be the show. The chemistry between Stephen Amell, Emily Bett Rickards, and David Ramsey was discovered as Season 1 evolved. 

Arrow struggled to find its footing in the first season and it took many episodes for the writers to hit their groove with OTA, but ultimately they found the right path. 

Source: Paige

Original Team Arrow is the gravity which kept the show centered. Diggle talks about the legacy of heroes Oliver launched, but in truth it is the legacy THEY launched.

Source: Paige 

This is the moment I started to lose it because it didn’t feel like Diggle, Oliver and Felicity talking. It felt like David, Stephen and Emily. The lines between real and fiction began to blur as these actors said goodbye to Emily/Felicity and to the team they formed both on and off the camera. 

Source: Paige 

Stephen is wrecked. He giving it his all to hold it together and failing miserably. You aren’t the one leaving man! You still have another ten episodes to do with David! Honestly, though is anyone surprised? No. Stephen is the fuzzy marshmallow of this group. Don’t let the abs fool you. He is powerless against the power of Felicity Smoak and Emily Bett Rickards.

Oliver/Stephen, Diggle/David, Emily/Felicity also say goodbye the way they began. Original Team Arrow officially formed in Season 1 Episode 14 “The Odyssey.” Oliver Queen’s story, particularly in Season 1, was shaped from Homer’s Odyssey and this is the not remotely subtle nod. Moira shoots “The Hood” and Oliver turns to Felicity for help. She brings him home to The Foundry, to Diggle, and they work desperately to save Oliver’s life.

Felicity is overwhelmed by the blood and is deeply concerned she and John are Oliver’s only option for medical assistance. Diggle has seen a lot of war and trauma. He’s trained for this. Well mostly. There’s a moment when he reaches out to grab Felicity’s hand to reassure her. John’s other hand is keeping pressure on Oliver’s wound flat against his chest and close to the heart. I’ve often called Original Team Arrow the heartbeat of the show and this is the moment their perfect circuit formed.

Source: arrowdaily

David Ramsey honors that iconic moment by reaching for Emily’s hand across Stephen’s shoulders and placing his other hand on Stephen’s chest, right against his heart. This is the bond that brought the show together and held it together for the last seven years. Original Team Arrow is front and center in the home and legacy they built. Losing Emily and Felicity’s character means saying goodbye to the entity this trio formed through their wit, love, chemistry and loyalty. Stephen and Emily pretty much lost it then and there and I was right there with them.

I wrote this way back in Season 3:

Each member and relationship is a beat of this heart. Diggle is a beat. Oliver is a beat. Felicity is a beat. Their relationships with one another: Diggle and Oliver, Oliver and Felicity, Felicity and Diggle, and of course the trio, are beats as well. When we remove one of these characters or relationships the rhythm of the show is changed.

It’s unfathomable to imagine the show without all three and yet this is where we’re headed. All I know for certain is next season Arrow’s heartbeat will be irregular. It will be an echo.

Source: arrowdaily 

Felicity/Emily tries to comfort Oliver/Stephen by holding his arm tight and gently nuzzling his shoulder. 

Source: arrowdaily

(Because it’s bad y’all. Number One on the call sheet is going down by the head! MAYDAY MAY DAY!)  Felicity has an entire relationship with Oliver’s shoulder. 

This is incredibly well documented. Whenever she grabs on to his arm and kisses his shoulder it feels like she’s an anchor trying to hold a ship steady. Oliver is home and Felicity will sail with him anywhere. And he will sail steady with her by his side. It always reminds me of a line from Message in a Bottle, “A harbor where I am forever home.”

Source: arrowdaily

Felicity and Diggle disperse and Oliver is left alone in the bunker 

Source: arrowdaily 

just like he began, but worlds away from the person he used to be.  

He came back from Lian Yu broken and completely shut down emotionally, but it was through the unconditional love of these two people that Oliver’s soul was saved and he found his way truly home. The city is finally at peace because Oliver is at peace. Their journeys were always one in the same.

Source: arrowdaily 

I’ve always said Oliver Queen is like the sun Star City revolves around. His light ultimately saved the city. 

But now Oliver is leaving, and unbeknownst to him, it will be for 20 years. Star City will fall again in that time. When Oliver leaves he takes the light with him. The bunker going dark is an ominous foreshadow for the future.

Source: arrowdaily 

Diggle brings Mr. and Mrs. Smoak to the love cabin where they will bring their child into this world. 

Source: legends-of-today

The Ninth Circle is still gunning for them. We receive no other explanation other than Emiko made sure Oliver’s family will die. Oooookay then. Hiding it is! The truly bizarre piece of Season 7 is we knew exactly where Olicity was headed for a long time, but seeing it all play out is no less painful… or wonderful.

John brings them to the safest neighborhood in the world – it’s filled with ex CIA, ex ARGUS and ex. Listen, this ain’t nothin’. I grew up next door to a cop. It was fantastic. 

The Olicity love nest is one big safe house hand chosen by the man who loves and ships them the best. Oliver keeps insisting it’s only temporary despite the Ivy Town like bliss and complete military protection surrounding them. Ugh, my sweet summer child. The more you say “temporary” the more it becomes anything but. Can someone please explain the rules of television to my son? Thanks.

Source: Paige 

Oliver lets it slip they are having a baby girl and Felicity follows up with the name. Olicity bursting with excitement to tell John Diggle about The Princess That Was Promised is so on brand. He practically willed this kid into existence and no one understands that better than Oliver and Felicity. Diggle is appropriately jazzed. Representing the fandom to the bitter end!

But can we talk about this gender reveal though? This means at some point during all the crazy Oliver and Felicity had an ultrasound AND THEY DIDN’T SHOW US.

I accepted no triplets. I think I’m handling it pretty damn well don’t you think? But I draw the line at missing the ultrasound. We had time to listen Dinah bitch about her job 34,234 times this season, but there was no time to show the ultrasound???!!!! 

My head canon is Oliver was late and had to show up to the appointment in the Green Arrow suit.

This also means Felicity is around the 18 – 20 week mark. I don’t know if this actually tracks because I don’t want to do math. I am simply accepting it as fact. I might be dating myself though. It’s been 12 years since I popped out a kid and maybe you can find out gender sooner than 20 weeks. 

Source: Paige 

Felicity isn’t showing too much yet, but every woman is different. That’s probably just lunch. Also have you seen her abs? ANYWAYS IT DOESN’T MATTER BECAUSE THEY ARE HAVING A GIRL, HER NAME IS MIA AND JOHN DIGGLE KNOWS.

The city is saved so John tells these two crazy kids to focus on their family. Can I just say no one has actually qualified why the city is suddenly saved other than for the team declaring it so, but whatever they are giving me an Olicity love cabin. 

I am perfectly content with it because it’s what Oliver and Felicity deserve. Star City can go screw themselves.

We get our Delicity moment. It feels like Marc, Beth and the writers came up with an “Emily Bett Rickards Is Leaving the Show” To Do list to make sure I didn’t riot outside their houses. This was a wise plan. I commend them for it.

The truth is we never get enough Delicity. It’s one of Arrow’s great failings. Hell, we can summarize the whole problem as not enough John Diggle. The ONLY positive I see out of Season 8 is maybe this man will finally get a storyline, but I’m getting ahead of myself. 

Source: Paige 

Anywho, Felicity is preggo, emotional and hiding away with her husband in a love cabin for at least the next four months, so she gushes to John about how much she loves him and how he will always be family. Then Delicity gets their hug on. 

Source: Paige 

STAHP. I JUST REGAINED COMPOSER.

Oliver and Diggle’s brotherhood and friendship has always been more of a focus than John’s relationship with Felicity, but that doesn’t mean he is any less her brother too. He has protected Felicity and offered her wise Yoda advice particularly when it came to Oliver and she needed it most. 

And Felicity has given John the same love and friendship in return. Diggle and Felicity are their own precious beat in this show.

The hardest part of Season 7 was seeing the strain in their friendship. Diggle refusing to help Felicity free Oliver still enrages me and I don’t think the writers gave the characters an adequate amount of screen time to repair that damage. But it doesn’t erase the last seven years between these two. Families disagree, fight and disappoint each other all the time. It doesn’t mean you stop being family. John had Felicity’s back in the end and if she can forgive him then so can I.

This cracked me up. 

Source: Paige 

These dudes still have ten more episodes together. Nobody is getting teary yet.

Olicity is finally alone after John leaves and Oliver is looking at his wife like a snack.

Damn. This blows @callistawolf​’s holiday in Aruba, and my personal head canon, to smithereens. However, we rebound nicely because Oliver Queen aka The Sex God has exactly one thing on his mind. Never change your priorities dude because they are on point.

Source: olicitygifs 

I remember in the early days of Arrow when sex scenes made me want to claw my eyes out because he slept with every female other than Felicity the first two seasons. 

But then the glorious Season 3 happened, we met Celibate Oliver and then THIS HAPPENED:

Oliver channeling all his sexual energy into one woman the last four years is character evolution I am here for. I’m also here for pregnant belated honeymoon sex. HAVE AT IT KIDS. 

Oh man! I don’t get to watch? Arrow continually stomping on my voyeuristic needs is really not cool. What the hell do they think television is for anyways?

They fade out from the kiss and I swear to God I yelled, “DO A MONTAGE!” and y’all THEY DID. Most of the time when I yell things at this show I am ignored, but every once in awhile they do the thing I ask. 

I had very few expectations going into 7x22. I write the occasional fic, but I’m really bad at coming up with things I want Olicity to do (other than sex) or words to say. The best moments on the show for me and the lines I love the most are the ones I can’t come up with. I didn’t have any expectations for a montage and it was everything I could have hoped for and more.

It felt like a truncated Ivy Town only better. 

Oliver and Felicity’s time in Ivy Town was idyllic because they left the insanity of Star City behind and lost themselves in each other. But there were cracks in the relationship even then. Their time in Bloomfield is much different. Oliver and Felicity have been through the good and the bad in their relationship. They’ve seen the worst and the best in each other. They found a way to be heroes and build a family together. Oliver and Felicity choose each other.

If their choice is the tree then this montage is the fruit it bears. My father said in his toast on my wedding day that a marriage is built in the quiet and simple moments. These are Oliver and Felicity’s quiet and simple moments. 

Source:  olicitygifs

They share a peaceful night enjoying being in each other’s company, rocking in chairs on the porch, under the stars, discussing anything and everything.

They take a stroll in the backyard with sweet baby Mia. 

Oliver lifts his baby girl high in the sky and is the picture of perfect happiness. 

Source:  olicitygifs 

This is the life Oliver never thought he’d have. It was the quiet dream he kept to himself alone in that bunker, night after night, resigned to his fate.

Arrow is a story about a man learning how to live again and this is Oliver Queen truly living. 

Source:  olicitygifs 

He falls asleep peacefully with his daughter safely tucked in his arms, happily cooing as he slumbers. (This is a factual representation of parenthood btw). 

When Oliver returned from Lian Yu his home was a stranger to him and the horrors of the five years away followed him into his dreams. Sleep was as evasive as peace.

Bloomfield isn’t the city Oliver grew up in and the Queen mansion dwarfs this cabin, but it doesn’t matter because Felicity is home. She is the reason Oliver faced his nightmares, forgave himself, and stopped merely surviving while he waited for death. Felicity Smoak gave Oliver a reason to live. She pushed her way through all the darkness, so his light could shine through. And their love created more reasons to live.

Source:  olicitygifs 

Oliver returned from Lian Yu to fight a war not just in the city, but within him.  He fought, clawed, bled and sacrificed his way to heroism while losing nearly everyone he ever loved along the way. Oliver has no superpowers. He became a weapon by sheer force of will.  Lian Yu burned everything he was to the ground and from the ashes he rose. Oliver’s pain molded him into someone else… something else.

But being a vigilante wasn’t enough. Two separate personas weren’t enough. Cutting himself off from his humanity wasn’t enough. Oliver needed to be more… so much more. He had to merge the darkness and the light, the man and mask. Sometimes the only way out is through. Oliver fought his battles and won not just by surviving, but by embracing life. And life to Oliver Queen is Felicity Smoak.

Oliver’s catalytic moment is his father’s death, but he was so short sighted about what his father was asking of him. 

This was always about more than Oliver righting Robert’s wrongs. This was always about more than a list or villains or even the city. Before he took his own life to save his son, Robert asked Oliver to be a better man. But the person Robert imagined wasn’t the Green Arrow. The man Robert imagined was this:

Source:  olicitygifs 

This man doesn’t happen without Felicity Smoak. Oliver saved the city, built a legacy, and became everything his father asked of him because of her. Felicity’s love gave Oliver the courage to open up his heart again after everything he suffered. Her compassion helped Oliver forgive himself. Her belief made Oliver believe he could someone he never imagined.

Sometimes even superheroes need to be saved. Felicity is Oliver’s hero. She saw the best in him. She harnessed his light.  Felicity was his path from purgatory to peace.  Love was the way through. And now he’s here. Oliver Queen is every bit the man Robert asked him to be and every bit the man Felicity Smoak deserves.

The road was long, painful, filled with loss and mistakes, but the man I glimpsed when he smiled at beautiful computer tech is here. 

I couldn’t connect with Oliver until he met Felicity Smoak. When he smiled I remember thinking, “Oh there you are Oliver.” And this is the man I saw in that smile. This is who he was meant to become. We’ve waited seven long years, but Oliver Queen is finally home. The dream foreshadowed all those years ago came true.

Source: feilcityqueen

And he’s about to be torn from it again. Even though I know this separation is coming nothing can prepare me for the pain. That said, Arrow isn’t known for their subtle and before they rip my heart out the writers give us hope. The montage began with Oliver and Felicity sitting on the porch with two candles flickering between them 

Source:  olicitygifs 

and it ends with two candles as Oliver and Felicity prepare to sit down to dinner.

Source: Paige 

Twin Flames.

We can have more than one soul mate, but we can only have one twin flame. A twin flame is one soul in two bodies. We are fated to meet this person and when it happens it is like coming home. There’s a ying and yang balance and even though twin flames seem like opposites they are really the same deep down.

Twin flames come in and out of each other’s lives and the relationship can often be tumultuous. However, separation is an illusion because their shared soul will keep them linked forever.  Twin flame energy inevitably leads to reunion and the souls will join together in perfect unconditional love.

SOUND FAMILIAR?!!!!

This isn’t the first time two candles have been used to represent twin flames. Oliver and Felicity declared their love and slept together for the first time just before being separated forever. 

We know Olicity is about to be torn apart again and for a much longer period of time. However, the flicker of the twin flames is light in the dark. It is hope in despair. Oliver and Felicity are one soul in two bodies. There is no separation for any length of time or distance which will ever distinguish their love. Their reunion is inevitable. They are meant to be together. It’s fate.

But first they have to separate. 

Oliver hears a noise, grabs a knife and brandishes it against The Monitor’s throat in a stellar parallel to Mia doing the same to Felicity in “Star City 2040.” 

Source: ebett

The Monitor doesn’t have to say a word. Oliver knows immediately why he’s there. It’s heartbreaking because he thought he had more time.

I think Oliver saw the newspaper heading of The Flash’s disappearance at some point and figured he had at least until 2024. Due to some shenanigans on The Flash which I won’t get into other than IT’S ALL BARRY’S FAULT (well his daughter too, but mostly Barry), “Crisis” is happening sooner. 

It’s bad enough Oliver is sacrificing his happiness to save Barry and Kara, but now that speeding disaster zone of a human being stole an additional five years from him. Five precious years.

Oliver didn’t know the exact terms of the bargain he made with The Monitor at the time, but he’s informed he has to go save the multiverse. Or whatever. Yes, Felicity knew about the deal. He told her. That’s not something I even worried about while watching.

Source: Paige 

The Monitor also tells Oliver he’s going to die while trying to stop the inevitable. Nice. This guy is a real charmer.  The least he could have done is offer another bottle of wine before he obliterates Oliver and Felicity’s entire life.

Now, before anyone freaks, the rules of television explicitly state that when the writers say a character is going to die they are NOT going to die. The more this show talks about Oliver dying the better you should feel. IT AIN’T HAPPENING FAM.

Felicity ain’t having any of this. 

Source: Paige 

She protectively steps in front of her husband and tells The Monitor to go screw himself. THATTA GIRL BABY GIVE HIM HELL! Felicity giving zero fucks about saving Barry, Kara or the universe is such a big mood.

The Monitor assures Felicity he’s not going to harm either her or their daughter. MIA IS TOO IMPORTANT. Hahaha raise that neon spin off sign a little higher executive producers. Mars can’t see it yet.

Source: Paige 

It’s cool and all that The Monitor isn’t going to kill Felicity and Mia (thanks?) but it doesn’t really solve her Oliver problem. Felicity doesn’t give a crap about the spin off because she won’t be in it. The spin off can go screw itself just like Barry, Kara and the universe. NOBODY IS TAKING HER HUSBAND. 

Source: Paige 

He’s Felicity’s twin-flame-superhero-sex-god-father-of-her-children-chef-extraordinaire. Do you know how hard it is to find a man who cooks like Oliver who also looks like Oliver? I guarantee there isn’t another man like him in the multiverse. This poor man’s version of Thanos can fuck off.

Oliver, because he’s superhero Jesus now, gently tries to convince Felicity to back off. 

Source: Paige 

Hahaha, that’s cute. It’s never gonna happen big boy. Your woman is fierce. Remember when she slipped you a Mickey post coital to smuggle you out of Nanda Parbat? I do. It was awesome.  Speaking of, thirsty Oliver?

Source: blakelivey 

OMG YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SO MUCH TRUTH!!!!

B*rry causes 99.9999999% of the problems in the DC Universe and suffers about 0. 0000001% of the consequences. In fact, Oliver suffers more from things B*rry does than B*rry ever has. A little death would be good for the kid. Consider it a growing experience. The world will be just FINE. Better even because we won’t have B*rry All*n jerking the timeline around. Diggle might get to keep all the kids he and Lyla have. The Flush deserves every bit of this comeuppance Oliver Queen. STAND ASIDE AND LET IT HAPPEN.

What about Kara?

She’s a lovely person, but I don’t watch her show anymore and my kid likes Hermione better now anyway. I am completely comfortable hanging her out to dry as long as Olicity gets to live their life in peace and happiness- even if it’s for a short period of time.

What about the universe?

Eh. Let the world hang Oliver. It’s cool man.  I’m about 51% sure I’ll go to heaven. Purgatory is for sure, so let’s roll the dice. Go sit down on the porch with your wife, raise your baby for the few months left, and we’ll all go out together in a blaze of glory. If you are taking requests because the world is ending then I would appreciate one more sex scene. Thanks buddy.

Source: blakelivey 

Honestly, the little headshake Oliver does when Felicity asks why it always has to be him says it all. Oliver has no answer for why the world is constantly screwing him over. So he slept with someone’s sister. Yeah, I know that was bad, but the man watched his father blow his brains out, was tortured multiple times, has been nearly killed every day for the last ten years, watched countless people he loves die, suffered a romantic horror show with L*urel, and put up with the Newbies & their bullshit for the last three years. Oliver has suffered enough.

Unfortunately, the Monitor tells Oliver he can save not only the lives of millions, but Felicity, William and Mia’s lives too. Damn it. Of course, he’s gonna go now. Even if he was comfortable letting the world go up in smoke (which I know he’s not) Oliver is not about to let his wife and children die.

Ruelle is playing and Oliver is walking into Mia’s nursery. Shiiiiiiiit.  This is going to rip out my heart. WHY CAN’T I EVER GET OBSESSED WITH A COMEDY?

I don't want to know Who we are without each other It's just too hard I don't want to leave here without you I don't want to lose part of me

Oliver is already crying, which means I am already crying. DID YOU HEAR THAT LYRIC? I think the only thing worse than Ruelle would be Sarah McLachlan at this point. These writers watched Buffy and it shows.

Source: olivergifs

Oliver looks into the crib at his perfect baby girl who is kicking, gurgling and not sleeping (factual representation of babies). He whispers “hey” the same way he’d whisper it to her mother whenever she was scared. 

This voice was how Oliver reassured Felicity. 

For so long it was the way he would tell Felicity he loved her without saying the actual words. Oliver whispers “hey” to tell Mia she’s safe. It’s his “I love you.” He can’t say the words or he’ll never leave. Oliver whispers “hey” because he can’t say goodbye.

Felicity is understandably disillusioned with being able to have a normal life. How can they if a caped alien agathokakological being is going to snatch their happiness away at a moment’s notice? This is a fair and accurate statement given the current state of events.

But what’s normal? It’s a relative term. Nobody is really normal. Sure, on the surface people look like they are living normal, everyday existences and to some extent that is true. But everyone has something they are dealing with. The something I deal with might be on a very different scale than the something you deal with, but nobody escapes this life without suffering. Nobody. And suffering always  obliterates our normal, everyday existence.

Oliver and Felicity want to sit on the porch, drink a glass of wine and be home to put their babies to bed every night. That’s a completely reasonable desire. It should be achievable even though their night gig is masked vigilantes. For a very long time it was achievable.

And yet it’s not because they are masked vigilantes. The needs of the many will always outweigh the needs of the few. This life Oliver and Felicity have chosen comes with a lot of benefits. They have found their true purpose. They help people. Oliver and Felicity even saved a damn city full of ungrateful twats.

But no choice is free of consequence. Life as a hero requires sacrifice.  Heroes put the needs of others before themselves. It’s what makes them heroes. You don’t hear me volunteering to save the universe do you? Hell no. Let it burn man! Make your peace with God everyone! I’m ready to go! I am not Oliver Queen and Felicity Smoak.  

Bloomfield was never the permanent plan. Oliver and Felicity always planned to go back to Star City and the bunker to fight another day. Felicity continued her life as Overwatch as she raised Mia. Oliver and Felicity are their best selves as Green Arrow and Overwatch, but it comes with significant downsides like danger anger, pain, loss and sacrifice. Their selflessness is what makes them heroes, but it costs them the very happiness they desire and deserve. Heroism is a bitch.

Of course, Oliver and Felicity have suffered enough. Of course, they deserve a happily ever after without any additional pain. Of course, they deserve to raise their family together for the next twenty years. But that’s not really the story Arrow is telling.

I mean… name one horrible thing that happened to Oliver that he truly deserved? He cheated on his girlfriend with her sister. So he deserved to watch his father commit suicide? Oliver was a drunken, whoring, layabout in his twenties. So he deserved to spend five years in hell tortured, beaten, fighting for survival and separated from everyone he loves? A lunatic forces him to pick between Sara and Shado and as punishment for that choice another lunatic murders his mother and lays waste to his city? Uh sure that’s balanced. These punishments don’t fit the crime. There’s nothing about Oliver’s story that is fair. It was never about fair.

Oliver Queen is an imperfect person. He tries and fails so many times, again and again. He is the perfect example of the disaster zone human beings can be while also representing the best of who we can be. He’s a murderer and a hero. Oliver is a sinner and a saint. He is light and dark like all of us.

But what I love most about him is his resiliency. He keeps fighting no matter what life throws at him. As does Felicity.  The truth is my friends; suffering is rarely “deserved.” There seldom seems to be a balance in the cosmic scale. I’ve witnessed terrible things happen to extremely good people. The fact they are good did not serve as a protective bubble from pain, although I naively at times thought it would.

If we’re all just doomed to suffer then what’s the point of being good? Why do bad things happen to good people? I believe we have to ask the right questions first and it’s never why. If the Lord Jesus Christ came down from heaven and explained to me in detail why the twins I miscarried had to be with him and not here on Earth with me, I’d still believe his decision was crap. There is no explanation God can give me which will make me understand why I had to lose two precious children. They belong here with me. Full stop. The Lord and I will just have to agree to disagree.

Why seldom leads to any answers. The question we should ask in the face of suffering is how. How do we survive this? How do I mold my body around this pain, become someone different, but not lose my soul in the process? More often than not suffering’s intent is to bring us to our knees. We aren’t supposed to be Pollyanna, although all the power to those who can. I believe we suffer so we understand we cannot survive alone. We need love. We need to reach out and for others to reach back. We need God. That’s how we survive.

I suppose that’s why I love hero stories. They are heightened and exaggerated reflections of suffering and survival. 

We watch these characters rise above loss, pain and darkness again and again. 

Not only do they survive, 

but they become a defining example of what selflessness, sacrifice 

and compassion look like.  

It doesn’t take a psychology major to understand why a girl, who has been in and out of hospitals her whole life, loves a character who has super strength, never gets sick and slays vampires. But Buffy’s story was not without pain. It was more often than not a story about pain.

I wish I could love selfish characters. I wish I could love stories where the biggest problem is solved in twenty minutes or less. I wish I could love relationships that are smooth sailing from start to finish and live happily ever after. I wish I could love stories like that, but I can’t. 

Those stories don’t resonate with me the way stories like Oliver and Felicity Smoak do because they aren’t a reflection of life. Pain and loss are as much a part of it as joy. I want to escape from life inside a story, but I also want it to give me hope. If these characters can survive their pain then maybe I can to. But that’s just me.

All I have wanted for Oliver and Felicity is for them to be happy, but that’s a fairly broad spectrum. I truly didn’t expect the suffering to stop until the final moments of this show and we aren’t there yet. Just look back on the ebb and flow of their relationship:

Oliver tells Felicity he loves her for the first time, but she’s kidnapped by Slade as a result of the confession. 

Oliver and Felicity go out on a date and the restaurant explodes.

They have sex for the first time and are separated forever (seemingly).

Oliver and Felicity get engaged and she is shot.

They get married after nearly being killed by Nazis.

Oliver is betrayed by his team 10 minutes after their wedding reception.

William is part of their lives, but his mother is dead and he’s kidnapped on a regular basis.

Felicity is pregnant, but Oliver’s psycho sister is trying to kill them with her wacko cult.

It’s a constant carrot, stick, carrot, stick, carrot, stick process. This is Arrow and it always will be. Oliver has finally saved the city. He’s more than earned a happy life with Felicity, their daughter and son. And now he has to sacrifice it all. This is the last thing Oliver and Felicity deserve, but this is why they are heroes. This wheel will keep turning until the final minutes of the show and only then it will stop. And we aren’t at the end yet.  

All Oliver has ever wanted is to keep the people he loves safe. It’s why he wore the mask to begin with. The idea of leaving Felicity alone with their infant daughter, knowing the Ninth Circle is out there and a hundred other dangers known and unknown to them, is crushing to Oliver. Their separation while Oliver was in Slabside did serve as a trial for what was to come. They had to discover who they were without each other. Oliver didn’t lose himself in the darkness once separated from Felicity. And she did whatever was necessary to keep her and William safe.

Source: feilcityqueen 

This is why Oliver is asking Felicity to make him this promise. There is nothing more precious to him than their children. The only way he can fight for the world is because he knows Felicity will fight for William and Mia every day. She will keep them safe. Oliver questioned the decisions Felicity made while he was in prison, but now he has her back completely. He knows she is strong enough to keep this promise. 

The promise is for Felicity too. If the worst happens and Oliver dies then their children, and the promise she made him, will give Felicity the strength to keep going… to keep fighting… to keep living.

Felicity makes Oliver a promise too. 

Source: @olicitygifs​ 

There is no amount of time or distance which will ever separate her love for him. They are one soul in two bodies. 

In the movie of The Count of Monte Cristo, Edmund is unable to buy his love Mercedes an engagement ring, so she wraps a string around her finger and promises to never take it off. When they come face to face again twenty years later, and even though she is married to the man who sent him to prison, the string is still on her finger. Felicity is making the same declaration. No matter where Oliver goes she will always be his wife and her devotion will never end.

Source: @olicitygifs​

I love that Felicity tells Oliver they are the best parts of each other. We’ve focused a lot on the impact Felicity had in Oliver’s life, and it was monumental, but he changed her too. Oliver opened up Felicity’s world. She found a strength she never knew existed, a purpose worth fighting for and a love worth living for.

Love wasn’t the finish line for Oliver and Felicity. Their relationship wasn’t the reward after all the struggle and hardship. Their love was the evolution. Oliver and Felicity inspired, challenged, changed and supported each other. They became heroes together. They are unique and interesting characters separately, but together they are magic.  Olicity brings out the very best in each other, which means they are living life to the fullest. This love makes life worth living… just as Diggle promised Oliver not so long ago.

And then the mic drop.

Source: @olicitygifs​

OLICITY IS BIGGER THAN THE FRIGGIN’ UNIVERSE. 

Oliver and Felicity are the OTPs of OTPs, the ship of ships and the story of stories. Olicity set the standard at infinity. No other love story will ever come close. At least not for me.

All the sorrow, sacrifice, joy and triumphs make Oliver and Felicity’s love story EPIC. In the immortal words of Logan Echol, “Spanning years and continents. Lives ruined and bloodshed. Epic.” Maybe their life isn’t normal, but it is extraordinary. This love will conquer all no matter how long it takes.

Source: @olicitygifs​ 

Whoa. I can do twelve pages just on this statement alone. WOW. These writers love shining a beautiful bright light on Olicity while simultaneously taking a crap on L*uriver. It’s truly a gift.

I am going to take some time to discuss this because this line is incredibly important. The writers are drawing a comparison to Felicity and Oliver’s past relationships for a reason. This is a deeply profound statement as Oliver reflects on the person he used to be and the person he is today.

Oliver shut down his emotions and became The Machine to survive those five years in hell. 

He told Felicity on their first date how he wasn’t able to see the humanity in other people when he returned home. 

He had shut off everything that made him human. 

Until he walked into Felicity’s cube and she sparked the light inside him. Then everything began to change.

But it was a very slow process. When we look back at Season 1 and Oliver’s behavior, his fear of being unable to love is quite prevalent. His inability to connect is crippling to his relationships with Thea, Moira and Tommy.

It’s even worse with the women he “dated.” Oliver was going through the motions in his relationships before Felicity. It was like he was playing a part. He mimicked what a relationship was supposed to look like without ever risking real vulnerability. There’s a wall inside Oliver and nobody knows that better than him. He had sex with these women, but Oliver wasn’t truly connecting with them and he knew it. No wonder Oliver believe he’d lost the ability to love.

Yes, even with Sara. The Original Canary will always be Oliver’s “perfect on paper” love interest. She was missing everything Oliver feared about a relationship with Felicity. I’m not just talking about the danger, even though Oliver’s fear for Felicity’s safety was high on his list of concerns. 

However, Oliver’s love for Felicity was like a raw nerve. It exposed all the vulnerabilities he worked so hard to protect. It took Oliver a long time to be ready for Felicity and he fought it nearly every step of the way. Loving Felicity reopened Oliver’s humanity, but that humanity came with the flood of pain he’d been trying to keep out.

Sara was a perfect path of avoidance because she was even more screwed up than Oliver, which says A LOT. The entire focus of their relationship was Oliver saving Sara. It was all about fixing her sins and brokenness. Saving Sara meant saving himself without having to bother with all the messy, uncomfortable and painful parts of his trauma. It was like putting a Sara shaped band aid over the gushing wound of his past. Not gonna work Handsome! Oliver also believed Sara was broken because of him. She was a manifestation of all his sins.

Oliver used these relationships like a mirror to reflect all the awful things he believed about himself. He failed Helena.  He wasn’t good enough for McKenna. He destroyed Sara. And L*urel was self hatred.

Din*h L*urel L*nce. Holy hell where do we begin? Every time Oliver talks about feeling undeserving of love he is referencing his relationship with L&urel. 

Hell, he told her that in the alien dream world. Real and sustaining love brings out our best selves, so it is impossible to feel undeserving of it. If anything it feels like the love you were always meant to find.

L*urel was the person Oliver believed he should love. He felt like something was wrong with him because he didn’t. Oliver decided to blow up his life rather than have an honest conversation with L*urel about it. This was a mistake he paid for and then some, but it didn’t mean Oliver’s feelings were wrong.

When he returned from the island his pursuit of L*urel was pursuit of self hatred. It was a continual cycle of chasing after her, trying to be worthy and failing. 

L*urel never missed an opportunity to tell Oliver he is a complete waste of a human being. And then the next week she’d be batting her eyes, panting and mauling him. 

I think Oliver became addicted to the cycle. When L*urel unleashed her vitriol and rage it confirmed every awful thing Oliver believed about himself. But redemption felt possible when L*urel showered him with affection and it was almost euphoric. He was stuck in this toxic cycle with her for a very long time.

Oliver’s pursuit of L*urel in Season 1 is much like his pursuit of his mission. He is chasing an illusion of love just like crossing off names on a list gave Oliver the illusion he’s saving a city. 

The reason he always talks about feeling undeserving of love when it comes to L*urel is because Oliver knew, deep down, she was chasing an illusion too. 

He knew the man L*urel loved didn’t exist. She loved who Oliver should be and not who he was. Oliver is L*urel’s “perfect on paper” love interest, but she never looked beyond the page.

L*urel: We decided to look for apartments together. I know it’s a big step but we’re ready. I think we’ll live together for a year, engaged for another and then –

Sara: Mrs. L*urel Queen.

L*urel: Maybe one day.

When love is unconditional we feel it. When love is conditional we feel it too. The illusion L*urel loved made Oliver feel like crap. He knew he’d never measure up.

If he let L*urel see who he really was then she would see him as less than. Which is worse – someone loving you for who you’re not or someone not loving you because of who you are?  It’s a tough call. No wonder Oliver got on the boat.

Not only was Oliver feeling undeserving of love, but he also felt incapable of love. This tells you everything you need to know about L*uriver. It was never about love. 

He was going through the motions with L*urel just like every other love interest. Oliver mimicked love, but he didn’t feel it. Not the way he should and, even back then, I think he knew that on some level. He was addicted to the toxic cycle with L*urel and what he wanted, more than anything, was to fix things with her. If he fixed everything with L*urel, if she forgave him and took him back, then it was like Lian Yu never happened. Oliver earns his redemption without having to look deep inside the pain. 

And none of that has anything to do with really being in love with L*urel L*nce. Furthermore, he’d be with a person who doesn’t really love who he truly is, which is exactly the kind of love Oliver Queen believed he deserved.

Felicity Megan Smoak is the antithesis of all of this. She is the first mirror to reflect all the good things in Oliver and slowly, bit by bit, he began to believe that reflection was true. The sheer force of her goodness was like a battering ram against the wall Oliver built inside himself. She cracked him wide open and all his light began spilling out. 

All the pain came with all that humanity and it hurt a lot, but Oliver was never alone. Felicity was always by his side. Her compassion made the pain bearable. It gave Oliver the courage to show Felicity who he truly was, the good, bad and awful, and he received unconditional love in return.

She was the first person to tell Oliver he deserved more. There was one inescapable truth Oliver couldn’t ignore. Oliver believes in Felicity Smoak. She is beyond reproach. Felicity is the best of humanity in Oliver’s eyes (and he’s right).  If that is true, and Felicity loves him, then maybe Oliver isn’t as bad as he thought. Even more importantly, she loves Oliver for who he is and not in spite of who he is. This is the difference between feeling deserving and undeserving of love.

Source: @olicitygifs​ 

This is what Oliver means when he says Felicity opened up his heart in ways he never thought possible. He repeats the words Felicity said the night she told Oliver she loved him for the first time. 

Felicity didn’t tell Oliver she loved him because it was her last chance. I mean… yeah it was, but that ignores the massive shift in Oliver’s behavior in 3x20.

Thea was near death and the pain brings Oliver to his knees. Thea was all he had left of his family. She was everything Oliver worked so hard to protect and he failed. 

Instead of pushing Felicity away like he has for most of Season 3, Oliver reaches out to her. He allows Felicity to take care of him. Oliver lets Felicity love him, truly love him, in all the ways he deserves and yet so adamantly refused to accept. And of course, Felicity reaches back. She tells Oliver not only how much she loves him but the profound impact he had on her life.

And that’s the point. Somehow amidst all the pain and suffering in life there is love. We must reach for it, particularly when our world seems darkest and the pain is too much to bear. If we can have a profound impact on one person, inspire his/her best self and make his/her life better by simply being part of it then our life will resonate long after we are gone.  We all deserve unconditional love. If we have to fall to our knees to find it then so be it because it makes life survivable. It’s why life is worth living.

This is gift of Olicity. This is the lesson their story teaches us. Unconditional love seems like such a simple idea, but it isn’t. It gets lost in all the noise of anger, blame, retribution, self hatred, selfishness and indifference. This is why we need hero stories. They serve as a reminder of who we should try to be. Maybe we can’t shoot a bow and arrow like Oliver Queen or hack computers like Felicity Smoak, but we all are capable of loving like they do. Arrow may be a little television show on an almost network, but Olicity’s love is a powerful example to us all.

It’s important to note Stephen is really starting to lose it here. We’re almost at Sarah Michelle Gellar “It’s not enough time!” level hysterics. 

For the love of God someone convince Emily to stay for another 10 episodes. Amell isn’t going to make it! Me neither fam. I honestly missed 95% of this speech the first time because I was sobbing so hard. 

And then he delivers the humdinger. 

Source: @olicitygifs​ 

There are three levels to an Oliver Queen line:

1. Swoon

2. Panty Dropper

3. Cardiac Arrest

This is a hardcore Level 3. It’s been nice knowing everyone! Cause of death: My Only Regret Is Not Telling You I loved You Sooner. Damn Oliver.

Felicity Smoak may be leaving, but lines like this can keep a fandom going for twenty years. Hell we could go fifty on this one. Think of the fics, gifs, artwork, metas and fan vids we can create from this line alone!

SO WHEN WAS SOONER OLIVER? Quite frankly, we could make a strong case for 1x03. Hell, I’m willing to argue for the 3x14 flashback too. One of the first metas I ever wrote was “When Did Oliver Fall in Love with Felicity?” and to this day it’s probably the most popular article I’ve written. It is my firm belief Oliver’s journey towards realization was slow and then it happened all at once. 

This line perfectly dovetails with all those moments because the truth is there is no right answer. Felicity Smoak evolved as Oliver’s true love as the show evolved and yet it was also destiny. Talent and chemistry met opportunity. The unexpected became the plan. That’s the magic of television.

This line reminds me of one from How I Met Your Mother.

“Hi. I'm Ted Mosby. In exactly 45 days from now you and I are going to meet and we're going to fall in love and we're going to get married and we're going to have 2 kids and we're going to love them and each other so much. ... I'm always gonna love you, til the end of my days and beyond. You’ll see.”

Oliver wants those extra 45 days or six months or two years or INSERT PERSONAL TIME FRAME HEAD CANON HERE. All he wants is more time with Felicity.

Source: @olicitygifs​ 

This is tooooo muuuuuuuch! 

Stephen and Emily are shattering my soul. By the way, Oliver finally said Felicity was beautiful! This has been in the fandom’s craw for a loooooong time and IT HAPPENED. (Marc and Beth check off #232).

As much as I love this line it is extremely painful because Oliver is acknowledging he won’t be around to watch Mia grow up. He’s accepted he’s going to die. 

But Felicity hasn’t. She makes her husband another promise and instills some hope in Oliver.  

Source: @olicitygifs​ 

Felicity Smoak is never wrong. If she refuses to accept Oliver’s fate then so should we.

One last I love you.

One last kiss. 

One last hug.

One last look. Memorizing every detail. This memory will have to last 20 years.

Source: @olicitygifs​ 

And then he’s gone. 

Felicity holds on for as long as she can until the distance breaks their hands apart.

And she is alone.

Life will always bring us to our knees my friends. 

Source: @olicitygifs​ 

It’s why our moments of joy are so precious. If you can glean one lesson from this love story I hope it is that.

Arrow did their very best to convince us Oliver is dead. Look guys! A grave!  

Source: olivergifs

Nothing short of a body, autopsy report and dental records will convince me of it. A headstone ain’t gonna cut it!

Felicity says goodbye to her children at his gravesite. 

Source: felicitysmoakgifs 

They’ve saved Star City in the future, but now Felicity & Co. is going on the run. She is putting the city in Mia, William, Connor and Zoe’s hands because they are ready. It’s time for the old guard to fade away and the new guard to step up.  

I don’t believe for one second Oliver Queen is dead, but I realized in this scene why Felicity has not gone out in search of him even though it’s been 20 years. Felicity couldn’t keep her promise to find Oliver until she kept the other promise she made him – to keep William and Mia safe.

All season we’ve watched Felicity struggle with letting go of her children and allowing them to be the heroes they are meant to be. 

Source: feilcityqueen

She knew it would be goodbye once William and Mia could protect themselves. Felicity has devoted her entire life to these children and sacrificed nearly everything – including finding their father. Felicity has been living the last twenty years torn in half as she faithfully kept all the promises she made to Oliver.

This is an impossible choice. If she stays with the children then she’ll never find Oliver. If she leaves to find Oliver then she can’t be with the children. And yet, Felicity made those decisions the last twenty years with grace and love.

I’ve always identified with Felicity in some way, but I probably feel the most connected to her in this scene than I ever have before. We’re supposed to raise our kids to be independent and contributing members of society, but they leave home when they become everything we’ve asked them to be. We spend our children’s entire childhood preparing them to leave us. It’s unbelievably difficult because all we want is to keep them close and hold on even tighter. The hardest part of being a parent is letting go.

And that’s what Felicity has done all season in the flash forwards. She’s held on as tightly as she could to William and Mia, trying to keep them out of the action and safe, but that’s not who they are. It’s not in their blood to stand on the sidelines. William and Mia are the children of heroes and now it’s their turn to carry on their parent’s legacy.  It’s time for Felicity to let go.

William and Mia are ready and the goodbye she’s been dreading the last twenty years is here. 

Source: smoakmonster 

As Felicity says goodbye she brushes the hair from Mia’s face just like Oliver brushed the hair from hers the last time they spoke. Oliver’s dream of Mia growing up to be as smart and as beautiful as her mom came true. She is everything Oliver could ever hope for and more just like William.  These children are his legacy.

Source: felicitysmoakgifs

Mia is heartbroken she never knew their father, which means she will get the chance in Season 8.  THESE ARE THE RULES OF TELEVISION OKAY?!

Source: felicitysmoakgifs 

Felicity solidifies Mia and William’s Season 8 arc by asking them to take care of each other (that neon spin off sign is flashing again too).

Source: felicitysmoakgifs 

 And now is the time we must say goodbye to Felicity Smoak and Emily Bett Rickards. 

Source: blakelivey

She was telling the truth when she told William and Mia she was going on a journey of her own, but it’s not as a fugitive on the run. 

Felicity waits in the middle of the road, the light of the moon streaming behind her like a flashlight guiding her on her journey, and The Monitor arrives. He is taking Felicity to Oliver.

Where she is going there is no return, which is why saying goodbye to Mia and William was so difficult. However, Felicity promised she would watch over them, so I’m thinking wherever she’s going isn’t completely cut off. The minute they “point of no return” then it automatically means the characters will return. Rules of television.

Felicity’s favorite story is The Wizard of Oz and this journey with The Monitor is like Dorothy leaving home for Oz. However, I prefer to think of it as Felicity leaving Oz for home because home is wherever Oliver is. There’s been sadness in Felicity’s eyes in the flash forwards because a piece of her is missing, but now her eyes are shining with light and joy. 

Source: felicitysmoakgifs 

The reunion she’s waited twenty years for is finally here. They are soul in two bodies and these twin flames will finally be together again.

I WAS SCREAMING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I couldn’t believe what just happened. I never expected Beth and Marc to give us Oliver and Felicity’s happy ending NOW. Yes, I know it happened off screen, but they are together. 

Hopefully, this multidimensional zone Oliver has been chilling in for the last twenty years looks a lot like Aruba and are having hot-we-waited-20-years-for-each-other sex.

Most of the time when an actor leaves a televisions show there are tons of loose ends and it’s vitally important he or she comes back for the series finale if there’s any chance of resolving the storyline happily. It is incredibly stressful as a viewer. 

But we don’t have to worry about Emily Bett Rickards coming back for the final season. I fully expect her to in the series final at least, but if it doesn’t happen for some reason then it’s okay. The writers planned for the worst case scenario and protected Olicity’s happy ending. 

This is a spectacular gift particularly for those who are saying goodbye to the series now.

I don't want to know what it's like to live without you

Don't want to know the other side of a world without you

Felicity twists her wedding ring, the symbol of her unending love and devotion to Oliver, and steps into the other side of the world to find her husband and fulfill her promise. 

She’s lived the last twenty years without him and she doesn’t want to spend another day without him. Felicity is going home to Oliver.

It’s the home we all found when Oliver brought a bullet ridden computer to the hacker with a ponytail and glasses chewing on a red pen. 

Source: felicitysmoakgifs 

Felicity Smoak and Emily Bett Rickards drifts out of our world with the same light and hope she drifted in with. Oliver may be my favorite character, but Felicity Smoak is the most important. 

There is no other actor or character who had more impact on the story and the trajectory of the show. Emily Bett Rickards came in as a day player, turned the show on its head, became the female lead and anchored the love story Arrow revolved around. THIS IS UNHEARD OF. IT DOESN’T HAPPEN. 

THAT IS PURE TALENT.

Even more importantly, the writers and Emily crafted a strong female character by embracing her humanity. Felicity Smoak is intelligent, witty, compassionate, brave, resilient, optimistic and honest. She makes mistakes (occasionally), but she always learns from them and it makes her a stronger person. 

This was never just Oliver’s story. It was Felicity’s too. She helped Oliver become a hero by being a hero in her own right.  She is a fictional character my daughter can look up to. She made me laugh, cry and ponder life as she wow’d me with her genius, heroism and open heart. That’s more than I could ever ask for.

Emily and Felicity Smoak brought the light to Arrow. 

She saved the show by becoming the show. It gave me a character and love story I will love for the rest of my life and for that I will always be grateful.

As for the future, Felicity essentially disappears inside a black star. The path home to Oliver is a black star. 

Source:  ebett 

No universe can disconnect the souls of this family. They will find each other again. We just have to wait and hope. 

Stray Thoughts

I care very little about anything else going on in the other 30 minutes, so I’ll just catalog my other rando thoughts here rather than create additional sections. Cool? Cool.

It really boils down to Emiko being ticked she didn’t get Queen Consolidated. Wow. My buddy Chris King really nailed it.

“He's trying to save you dumbass.” BEN TURNER GETS TO STAY. I’d exchange Ben Turner for Curtis Holt, Dinah and Rene in a heartbeat. IN. A. HEARTBEAT

Speaking of  Curtis. Keep it. Completely unnecessary having him in Emily’s last episode. 

Nobody really buys that Rene and Dinah should be part of the Mark of Four right? Good. Just checking. 

“Been there before." Never change Roy Harper. I love you just the way you are

“I wanted to be a Queen.” I didn’t really care about Emiko, but that line got me.

“Overwatch?” Annnnd Curtis answers. This is why he had to go. I HATE HIM.

Oliver saved the city and stopped Emiko by using over a decade of loss, pain and PTSD to therapy his sister out of her crazy. That’s kind of awesome.

The parallel of Mia and Oliver fighting was flawless. Probably one of the coolest stunts the show has ever done.

I’m here for Father/Daughter selfless crime fighting duo. I’m going to keep saying I need a spin off until I get it.  Source:  ghxstfoxgoddxs

Mia gets her Daddy’s bow, so the bird fans really need to stop with all the Canary nonsense. How they don’t understand she’s the Oliver in the future/new show is beyond me.

QUEEN SIBLINGS FOREVER! Source:  blackstargifs

The “let’s talk custody with William’s grandparents” line was weird. William’s whole storyline present and future was weird. Keeping William with his grandparents was meant to solely facilitate the Mia shocker and it will always be the piece of this storyline that does not work for me.

I seriously thought the fade out from Oliver’s grave would be the last of the flash forwards and I was going to be ticked because I didn’t want to do yet another season of “Is Oliver Dead?” Or “Is Felicity dead?” for that matter. SO OVER IT. I was completely overjoyed it was not the end of the flash forwards.

Can we all just finally agree the writers would rather chew their hands off than kill Felicity Smoak? Because it’s true.

L*urel isn't part of the Mark of Four. She gets a handshake because that's the same. This show is so savage with any version of her character. YIKES.

Rene lived! Shocker.

Felicity instructing John how to take care of the bunker is my level of OCD.

“I have to find a way to atone for that.” Sooo… you park it on a deserted island?

William asks how Roy ended up on the island and he pretty much says it’s a great story, but then doesn’t tell him. HILARIOUS.

Stephen dropped the bag on the stairs and looked like he was trying not to laugh as David finished his lines. The fact this is the best shot they had is further evidence of all the shots Stephen probably blew with all his feelings. Source:  legends-of-today

No Diggle in the flash forwards, so that’s something to look forward to for Season 8.

I have absolutely no idea how Season 8 is going to work. Is it going to be like the prison storyline and Oliver is just off on his own universe show while Diggle holds down the fort in Star City? Oooookay.

So much Outlander it ain’t even funny.

Are you alive? You just read a term paper on Olicity and Felicity Smoak. 

Thank you for your patience as I finished this review and thank you for reading it! 

To all those who are moving on thank you for visiting this blog, reading what I write, and helping me create a space for us all to enjoy a television show we love. I appreciate all the support and can never thank you enough. Feel free to visit any time because I’m not going anywhere! I have some fun things planned for this summer and of course there’s still 10 more episodes of Arrow in the fall. 

To those sticking around thanks for hanging with me until the bitter end.

Disclaimer: Any gifs on the blog are not mine. If you would like a gif removed from my reviews, please message me. 7x22 gifs credited.

If you’d like to support the blog, please buy me a cup of tea!

[yo-namine]

Okay, time to talk to myself about Re:Mind and Limit Cut Episode. 

Spoilers galore under the cut!

I'm just gonna start off by talking about how the DLC handled my biggest gripe with base KH3, which was obviously how Kairi was written in the last few hours of the game. Like I said in my other post, Re:Mind doesn't totally fix those problems, but... Well, here's what we get:

Kairi's "murder" is reframed a bit in the DLC. Base KH3 presents it as Xehanort killing her just to provoke Sora et al. into "clashing" with him to make the final key. In Re:Mind, we learn that Xehanort was actually stowing Kairi away (by "crystallizing" her, which... means she wasn't dead? But Sora still takes all the steps Chirithy gives him that are specifically for restoring a heart from death, and it works, so...?) as a fail-safe of sorts in case he needed another Light. Xemnas foreshadows this a bit when he says that Kingdom Hearts needs the Princesses of Heart in case the whole 13 Clashes of Light and Darkness thing doesn't work out. And for what it's worth, I do think this is a little better for Kairi as a character just because it shows that she was "killed" due to something unique and special about her, rather than what she was to Sora. She's still being used, and she's still sapped of her agency, but presumably no other character could have worked in that role against Xehanort, so... that's something, I suppose.

During the Xemnas/Saix/Xion fight, there's an added scene where all the Lights get to take a shot at Xemnas, and Kairi actually broke that motherfucker's guard and made him stumble when no one else could... And then she got captured, bloop, but at least this time it was because she was actually fighting and simply got bested. I can appreciate that. I liked seeing her shield Axel from Xion's attack, too.

And of course, she does get the chance to take on Xehanort later. She has a nice battle set-up (a sort of warp dash ability similar to Riku's and Roxas's, shotlock, reflect, and a GORGEOUS link attack with Sora), and it's a little cathartic to play as her taking Xehanort down. However, I don't think she ever learns that Xehanort took her as a safety measure for his plan or why she was the one chosen for this in the first place. She doesn't speak to Xehanort at all, which makes her big battle with him at the end feel rather... impersonal? And never mind him "killing" her in KH3; Xehanort's ultimately responsible for her losing her family when she was four years old, as well as the destruction of her home world. I'm not saying Kairi and Xehanort needed to have some long overwrought conversation or anything, but there definitely should've been some dialogue between them.

Kairi's actually involved in Naminé's restoration after all!!!!!!!! I remember the Ultimania's explanation of Naminé's return leaving a bad taste in my mouth because it seemed like they framed Kairi's death as ultimately a good thing, because hey, at least her murder freed Naminé from her heart. But that's not what actually happened; instead, Kairi and Sora go to Radiant Garden at the end of the game, and she lets him use the keyblade to release Naminé's heart from hers. And honestly, that scene right there? That was probably my favorite part of this entire DLC. The fact that Kairi really did play a part in restoring her Nobody is a much better payoff to her earlier lines in the game about wanting Naminé to have her own experiences. She wanted to give Naminé her life back, and rather than that being something wrenched from Kairi against her will, it was something she did for Naminé of her own volition.  I just. 😭

/tl;dr thoughts on kairi

As for everything else in Re:Mind:

I loved the background moments with Sora and Kairi in the ending cinematic. Each one is framed so that you can't see their faces, so they all feel like you're looking in on something secret. The "Behind the Curtain" trophy name is pretty fitting (and just downright cute, lol). And like I said above, I loved the scene where Kairi and Sora restore Naminé's heart. You just see him pull the keyblade away from her chest, and then she cradles Naminé's heart in her hands and fjsldfjskd. I teared up at that. It was just such a sweet and gentle little moment. Sora and Kairi taking Chirithy to Ven (and Sora even giving them a little push, lol) was really sweet, too. I loved their body language while they watched Ven run off, how you see them turn toward each other just slightly.

I also like how Sora and Kairi's relationship evolved from "Even if we're apart, our hearts are always connected" to "Heart connections are nice and all, but I'd much rather actually be with you."

Demyx and Riku interacting was something I never knew I needed. Riku's like "PLEASE be careful with that vessel, it's very important--" and Demyx is just "Bro, I got this," and hoists it over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes.

Sora and Roxas actually talk to each other! I liked the scene where Sora's Station of Awakening starts to peel away to reveal Roxas's, and you get little glimpses of Roxas's memories. And it turns out that Sora actually did release Roxas's heart from his, and it wasn't just Xemnas kicking Xion into his chest that did the trick, lmao. I like that change.

Xemnas mentions that the original Organization doesn't remember Xion, but they do have records of her. That's a nice little tidbit to have for my Day 4 AU. 👀

Saix says the Guardians must be desperate if they're getting a Princess of Heart involved in the war, and Axel's like "Nah, she's our trump card." Aw. I also thought it was interesting how Saix purposefully uses Axel and Roxas's names to try to trigger Xion's memory of them.

I had to watch the recusant's sigil bit like four times before I understood what the hell was happening, lmao. The sigil represents the Sea Salt Trio's actual connection to one another that they had to "reclaim" from Xemnas, which... okay, but why was that needed? The thing I always liked about this trio is that they're the only one that we see develop fully from the beginning to the end of their relationship. They were always the most believable (canon) trio to me because of that, so throwing in this whole "The sigil binds us together!" thing just seems kind of stupid and unnecessary. They're friendship is good enough as-is. You don't have to add in this nonsense to represent their bond; their relationship development itself already did that. But whatever, they still had a really cool combo attack.

Scala ad Caelum is expanded on! I really enjoyed exploring it and solving the little puzzles to put Kairi's heart back together.

I LOVED THE GUARDIANS VS. NORT REPLICAS BATTLE SO MUCH I HAVE TO YELL ABOUT IT. I ACTUALLY DIED THE FIRST TIME BUT I DIDN'T CARE THAT I HAD TO REPLAY IT BECAUSE I WAS HAVING SO MUCH FUN. THE TAG TEAM ATTACKS!!!!! AQUA, XION, AND MICKEY'S COUNTER-ATTACK!!!!!! EVERYONE ACTUALLY WORKING TOGETHER!!!!!!!! IT’S ALL I EVER WANTED!!!!!!!! 

There are so many cute dialogue exchanges during the Guardians vs. replicas sequence, too! Ven and Roxas compliment each other, Aqua scolds Axel for talking too much (twice, I think? Axel fusses at her the second time, lmao), Terra says something to Riku that I couldn't quite catch, and Riku's like "All thanks to you!" It's just so cute and charming, and it really made the Guardians finally feel like a team.

Mickey Mouse straight-up Boromir-ing his way through the Nort replicas was... I think I loved that? Yeah, no, I loved that. I was laughing through half of it because I kept getting knocked back, but it was a great sequence (visually and gameplay-wise).

Connecting all the keyholes was very satisfying, and was just a beautiful visual altogether.

Sora and Kairi's reunion was adorable. And then Sora sees Goatanort enter the scene, and he just looks at Kairi and is like, "You ready, B?" and Kairi's like, "FUCK yeah, I'm taking his trachea through his kneecaps!!!!!" Okay, not really, lmao. Actually, Kairi's surprised when Sora asks her that, like she didn't expect him to let her help, or maybe she felt like she wouldn't even be able to, but she says she's ready anyway. Kairi’s under-confidence in her fighting skills is a little more apparent in the DLC. Like she says "I can do this" right before the final battle, but it comes off as her trying to reassure herself. She even has a counterattack where her battle quote is "Please work!" and I don't remember hearing her say that in the base game. Girl knows how outclassed she is compared to most of the other Guardians (and Xehanort), but she fights like hell anyway. Attagirl. 🎉

And as for Limit Cut:

Aww, I love that Terra calls Riku "a great leader."

Cheers to David Gallagher for saying "Are you sure about this?" with the exact same inflection as the John Cena meme.

Riku's a master now, right? When will he get some spiffy keyblade armor???????

Okay. Riku is having dreams about looking for Sora. Sora is dead (?), and "the edges of sleep and death touch." Kairi has been asleep for the past year so that the Radiant Garden team can study her heart in effort to find Sora. Nomura? Nomura? Nomura. You cannot fuck this up, man. You can do this. You can write the Destiny Trio working together again. You can write a full story in which Kairi has an active role. You can write her and Riku interacting. You can do it. I believe in you.

The data battles are so hardddddd. I wound up just watching all the LC cutscenes on youtube, lmfao. But I do want to try to beat at least some of these bosses. Tragically, Riku is TRAPPED IN MERLIN'S HOUSE, so you can't leave to grind or anything. Boo.

I don't really care about Yozora. I think we got a confirmation from Sora that Nameless Star is Stella (?), and that's cute for her I guess, but I genuinely don't care, lmao. But I definitely understand the compulsion to include beloved characters from old cancelled projects in your newer ones, so I hope Nomura has fun with that. ...That sounded sarcastic, lol, but I meant it. I hope he gets to do something cool and creative with this recycled cast. It just might not be a story I'll end up following, is all.

Data greeting is SO much fun. I sank a couple of hours into that the other night just creating scenes and playing with effects. The controls are really easy to use, and it's even fun to just explore environments like Radiant Garden and Scala ad Caelum without messing with photos at all. I hope we can unlock more character outfits and poses in the future, but I can definitely enjoy it as is for now.

Overall, I'm pretty happy with this DLC. True, about half of Re:Mind is a rehash of the Keyblade Graveyard scenes with some extra content here and there, but it's sort of justified story-wise since we're in a timeloop. I enjoyed the extra Kairi scenes and the interactions between the Guardians the most. Limit Cut is mainly just bonus bosses, but like I said, I do want to actually beat those once I can figure out a strategy for them. And I'm obviously having way too much fun with Data Greeting, lmao, so yeah. Not a bad update.

[terramythos]

TerraMythos' 2020 Reading Challenge - Book 3 of 26

Title: Shriek: An Afterword (Ambergris #2) (2006)

Author: Jeff VanderMeer

Genre/Tags: Weird, Memoir, Historical (like... in a fictional world lol), Horror, Fantasy, War, Mushroompunk (yeah), Postmodern, Female Protagonist, Disabled Protagonist, First Person, Unreliable Narrator.

Rating: 7/10

Date Began: 1/19/2020

Date Finished: 1/29/2020

Shriek: An Afterword is a pseudo-memoir by a woman named Janice Shriek about the troubled lives and relationships of her and her brother Duncan Shriek in the strange, fungus-riddled city of Ambergris. While Janice believes Duncan is dead, he's apparently found her manuscript and makes extensive edits and commentary throughout the story. (This is indicated in parenthetical sentences, like this one.) 

The closer I get to the end, the closer I get to the beginning. Memories waft up out of the ether, out of nothing. They attach themselves to me like the green light, like the fungi that continue to colonize my typewriter. I had to stop for a while -- my fingers ached and, even after all that I have seen, the fungi unnerved me. I spent the time flexing and unflexing my fingers, pacing back and forth. I also spent it going through a box of my father’s old papers -- nothing I haven’t read through a hundred times before... On top, Duncan had placed the dried-up starfish, its skeleton brittle with age. (I kept it there as a reminder to myself. After your letter to me -- which, while reading this account, I sometimes think was written by an entirely different side of your personality -- I wanted to remember that no matter how isolated I might feel, separated from others by secret knowledge, I was still connected. It didn’t help much, though -- it reminded me of how different I had become.) 

To qualify my rating, I have to be honest. This book is officially separated into two parts, and I found Part I -- which makes up about 60% of the novel -- pretty boring. On the other hand, Part II is brilliant, and everything coalesces beautifully in this second act. Is it worth it? I thought it was, but I understand anyone who tries and gives up. 

Even though Shriek is technically a standalone, I would strongly recommend you read City of Saints and Madmen (#1) first. Both Duncan and Janice are key characters in two of those stories (The Hoegbotton Guide to the Early History of Ambergris and The Transformation of Martin Lake, respectively), and there are references and connections all over the place. I’m not sure if Shriek does a great job introducing Ambergris to new readers, so people starting here will be pretty lost without reading the first book.

Just to clear the air, I really liked this book... overall. As I said, the first half-or-so of the book was pretty rough, but the second half redeems it in a lot of ways, even justifying certain writing/plot decisions that didn’t gel with me at first. However “it gets good eventually” is not really an excuse for the rough first half. Hence the mediocre rating. I was close to giving this book a 6/10, but I found that I appreciated the first half much more by the time I got to the ending, so that bumped it up a little. Maybe I’ll enjoy this book more on a reread when I can see the patterns and know where they’re leading ahead of time. 

Before I dive into my issues with it, I’d like to discuss the strong points of this novel. 

At a base level, VanderMeer is a great writer. He has a mastery of the English language that always delights me when I read his stuff. So even when I struggled to like this story in the first half, his wordplay and prose were entertaining and thought-provoking. 

I loved the format. The story basically has two protagonists, since you see things from Janice’s point of view and then Duncan’s interpretations-- but it’s in a very postmodern way, not just a perspective switch like most novels do. Duncan’s commentary often brings much needed humor or heartbreak, depending on the situation. 

In particular, any scene in which Janice and Duncan interact directly is brilliant. Janice recalls a scene, but her memory is faulty (like anyone’s), so sometimes she forgets what they talked about, or interpreted an interaction in a certain way. Then Duncan dives in with his own commentary, supplying information Janice didn’t include or forgot, or correcting something she said, or offering an alternate interpretation... these scenes were fascinating to read and some of my favorite parts of the novel. 

There’s a lot of fun revelations and Easter eggs for people who read City of Saints and Madmen. In particular: 

My favorite story in the first book was The Cage, which is a work of fiction  within the universe of Ambergris by a man named Sirin. In particular there is a very creepy and distinct monster that plays a pivotal role in the story. However, since it’s technically fiction within fiction, that monster and the events didn’t really happen in canon... right? Imagine my surprise in this book when Janice encounters and describes a very similar monster. This struck me as odd, until I got to epilogue/afterword at the end... written by Sirin, and everything clicked. He got the idea for his “fictional” monster from Janice’s account in this story. He doesn’t state this outright, but it’s the only explanation that makes sense. I loved that. It was like putting a puzzle together and it would have been so easy to miss. And there’s the extra horror that something like that really exists in this world. There was other stuff like this but this one stood out to me, and I’m sure there’s other things I missed. 

This mostly concerns the second half, but the war sequences and memories are horrific and brilliant. It's very World War II-esque with a unique twist to it (the awful fungal bio weapons one of the sides uses). In particular, the war is introduced with a chapter about a ceasefire opera staged in the broken city... without spoiling it, it’s an excellent and intriguing self-contained story. 

And the horror chapter about the Festival, which is conspicuously absent in the rest of the story? Just so goddamn good. VanderMeer strikes just the right chord with me when it comes to horror. It’s always fresh and intensely creepy. 

If you told me this during the first half, I wouldn’t believe you -- but I ended up loving the characters and finding most of their relationships fascinating. This is a heartbreaking story and it really hit home by the end. 

With that lofty praise, what’s my issue with Part I? The simplest way I can put it is that the struggles Duncan and Janice face are so mundane. They would maybe be interesting in a generic work of fiction, but here they felt out of place. For example, Janice’s arc concerns her rise to fame, which leads to success, which leads to lavish parties and orgies, which leads to excesses and a drug addiction, which leads to a suicide attempt, which leads to rehab, which leads to a diminished life of poverty. Yes, these can be interesting and harrowing problems in the right context, but the strongest point of these books is the setting, and there was nothing that tied these events to Ambergris. You could easily go through and change the character/place names and it wouldn’t seem off. 

Duncan is a little more interesting in this regard, because his is a story of obsession. In particular, he’s obsessed with the gray caps (strange humanoid mushroom creatures that haunt the pages of these books), and it takes over his life until he becomes totally discredited as a historian. But even he falls into this trap when he becomes a college professor and has an affair with one of his much younger students (Yikes! Though it is treated as creepy within the story, at least). That takes over most of his character’s emotional core from that point. 

Said student -- Mary Sabon -- is a core antagonist in the story. Janice in particular obsesses over her and her personal vendetta against her, and honestly even with the second part I was never really sold on this or cared about it all that much, so I was disappointed it took up so much of the story. 

All of this would be one thing, but there’s all sorts of tantalizing hints about more interesting things. The gray caps probably have some ulterior motive that no one knows! There’s this crazy eldritch Machine hidden underground! Duncan is sort of turning into a mushroom! But these are only teased before the story pivots back to something comparatively uninteresting. Rather than encouraging me with the cool foreshadowing, it just got grating because it meant there were more interesting events and stories going on that I didn’t get to see for some arbitrary reason. Janice also rambles and goes back and forth quite a bit. This is clearly intentional (after all, you learn in the end this is a mostly unedited draft -- at least in the fiction of the story), but even so, it can be hard to follow at times. 

Part II justifies a lot of this because these hints do pay off. You DO get to see a lot of the interesting stuff in detail at this later point of the story, and it’s not always what you expect. There’s overt and subtle dramatic irony and contrast between what characters go through in the first half versus the stranger, more profound traumas of the second half. You learn Janice is suffering from some severe PTSD and it explains a lot of the manic style in the first half. But again, is it worth 245-ish mediocre (to me) pages? I think that probably depends on the reader. I had a problem with it-- but clearly a lot of people don’t, based on reviews I’ve skimmed. Many put the book down and don’t finish it, but that’s true for any book. Hell, lots of people preferred the first half, so who knows. 

Ultimately, I’m glad I read this book. For me it really does come together in an amazing way toward the end, and I found myself really caring about Janice and Duncan. If you read City of Saints and Madmen and want more of the characters and the world, then definitely give this a try. But it is a pretty niche book as these things go, so I can’t recommend it to everyone. 

Anyway, I’ve come this far -- so I’m going to read Finch, the final (for now?) installment in this universe.