#all I can think when I see a Mag whatever is “I'm gonna give her sum colours to match the magnetic poles :D”

[sharky857]

Didn't do much with Aoi's fashun, but she's too pretty not to get her own photoset as well. 💖

Oh, I also took a few shots with Eleanor's gemini emote, but they were giving me "war flashbacks" by reminding me THAT MFING [REDACTED] SCENE in the quest, sooo... :°°°D

[zabala0z]

S3 is once again killing me again with all the lore and I love it. School started up so I might be slower with my thoughts but I got episodes 92, 93, 94 and 95 to talk about!!!

MAG 92: Nothing Beside Remains

Elias makes me want to eat my phone, similar to that one guy from MAG 65 :) I was like screaming the whole time. Of course he can see everything, he literally called the police before Daisy came. I took that as "oh he has spies" but no he can see everything, I hate that. Is Jon eventually gonna get that ability or does The Eye give different gifts. Elias hasn't shown any "compellling" sort of power so I assume the latter. ALSO MORDECAI LUKAS?? I need to see a statement from a Lukas member cause what is up with that family, I'm dying.

Guess Basira is now working there. Hope Elias is paying her. the fact he won't tell Jon shit is so funny to me. So The Stranger is now, basically, the confirmed main villain. BBEG yknow? Mildly terrified, I hate circuses and mannequins so this season is gonna like body me

Not much to say on MAG 93 but whatever entity has the whole "gross shit" as its deal, I'm guessing this falls under it. Purple fungus, the obsessive cleaning, etc. Also yaaay Breekon and Hopes!! Again!11!! get out! Poor Georgie. Love her for being like "Do you even have qualifications??". Jons explanation helped me a lot because during Elias's explanations, I'm mostly just muttering curses to myself because I HATE Him. Avatars. Baller. So Jude Perry was the avatar of The Desolation (destruction, fire, etc) Michael Crew was the avatar of The Vast (sky??, emptiness, general loneliness) and then like Jon is an avatar and I'm guessing so is Elias. I think you can have more then one avatar but anyways.

MAG 94: Dead Woman Walking

Jon refereed to the entity as "The End" which, using my notes, was mentioned in Mary keys statement when gertrude asked where the book came from and Mary said "The End" and said she could never serve it, not finding death interesting. Wild that she can't feel fear anymore??? Like damn. This kinda read as someone in a depressive state in some form. Or like a nihilistic person. Cause like "everything ends, time, it has already ended". Wild.

Not much to say on MAG 95 but I did understand the context vaguely which is more then what I can say for the other war statements. Also Martin and Basira friendship??? Love it. She gets really engrossed in books. I dunno if she was like lying or this is something supernatural related but I love Basira

MAG 96: Return to Sender

Literally screeching oh my god. The fact these things just hijacked this mans business is almost funny. They also talked with a circus ringmaster. Nikola Orsinov? gregor Orsinov? A different one. the statement was given 1996 and Gregor was the leader around the 40's but Nikola, by her description I think, sounded young. So. Who was this ringmaster? Maybe Im getting the timeframe wrong. or they're like eternal. Maybe they like just shed skin and steal a new body, just going by the same last name- okay I don't know.

Also, SARAH BALDWIN???? Welcome back girl. The fact the gorilla skin was stolen by gertrude means she was trying to stop The Unknowing, and likely that's why its been this long for it to happen, because they need that skin. Ew. The Stranger loves skin a little too much. Also Sarah being filled with sawdust and cloves. Great. If Not Sasha was shot, would we have seen that? Or is it different with every one of those, NotThem.?

Anyways, I think that's everything. Every statement, I'm kinda thinking, "which entity does this fall under" now that I know the surrounding universe. Tough since I only know 6 by name and I think there's more. 6 too many entities for this world though

[aew-regression-cove]

caregiver finnick odair headcannons

🌊⊹₊ ⋆🔱 ࣪°•`. regressor reader

@aew-kun

Most playful caregiver ever-

^ (He has / pulls the goofiest smile that never fails to make you laugh)

He loves looking after you!!! He has been through a lot and feels as he hasn't been able to protect the people he loves up until now and so would do absolutely anything for you and he'd find it so healing to look after you!!!

Firm when it comes to your self care. He is not letting you neglect yourself.

"that's why I'm here sweetheart, not gonna let that happen or I wouldn't be doing a very good job now, would I?" He'd say in a light tone however serious about what he's saying.

^ Overprotective to the max!!!

Nose boops all the time!!!

Teaches you to swim

Overall pretty good with rules. (He thinks routines are important for you!!!), when it comes to bedtime there are plenty of cuddles whilst you settle down. I do however think he'd be the worst when it comes to limiting sugar lol 😂

Would spoil you as much as he can

Spends any and all free time with you!!!

He would enjoy dressing you in his jumpers!!! He likes how they look on you!!!

Does little things for you like thing your laces, zipping up your coat, ect.

Ocean/sea animal related toys when he can because he finds it a little amusing

"Guppy", "Baby", "Sweetheart", "Princess/Prince". He also loves nicknames based on the ocean!!! <333

I feel like he'd teach you (some very basic) moves with a trident (his weapon of choice ofc) in case for whatever reason you needed to defend yourself from something or someone. (You wouldn't ever have to tho because he'd do anything to protect you!!! And Snow is willing to negotiate if it keeps him in line 😭😭😭)

Gifting each other pretty shells and rocks the two of you find!!!

I think he'd enjoy telling you stories- he comes up with some absolutely crazy ones!!! :3

Loves loves loves playing with/fussing your hair!!!

Would let you put makeup on him or stick stickers to his face- :3

Picks you up and spins you when giving hugs!!! 🤗

He isn't the best at it but he absolutely LOVES artistic projects- he is getting paints and other art materials out constantly- (Peeta has corrected his technique before lol)

Ruffles your hair on purpose to mess it up- he finds it hilarious if you huff about it-

Struggles to sleep if you are not near him- he finds comfort in being able to physically see you (especially because of nightmares)

He somehow always knows when you are lying- and is slightly infuriatingly cocky about it 😂

He would have a lovely home after the war with you in district 4 <333

^ Lots of trips to the beach/sandy areas-

Mags loves helping Finnick look after you!!! Super gentle and she's always giving Finnick tips!!!

Johanna actually enjoys babysitting you and purposely causes trouble. (She 100% eggs you on with swearing whilst Peeta looks stressed and Katniss is unbothered lmao) — Those 3 are a deadly babysitter trio btw- so so good!!! 🙌🏻

He is the absolute best with boundaries!!! You don't wanna do something? He will always listen to why- and won't ever force you unless it's something that you actually really need to do-

Amazing with injuries- will distract you whilst patching you up- he's so good you won't even realise he's finished until he points it out!!!

If he wants to get your attention or comfort you (sometimes her just does it for no reason/bcs he likes it) he gently cradles your face. <333

He has at least once picked you up and sat you on his hip, he can't help it- he just loves holding you close like that!!!

He has / can find a solution for literally any situation-

Warmest hugs!!! <333

GENTLE GENTLE GENTLE 🥺💗

Makes breakfast with you!!! (He'd sit you on the counter next to him whilst he makes the food)

ⓘ this particular post is very self indulgent and personal to me so I will not be unlocking this post for anyone, sorry. <3

[phantomofthehoepera]

I love your 2023 Repo the Genetic Opera art... Please... Please I'm desperate I need to know the lore... Please...

HAIIII SORRY I'M SO LATE TO THIS idk if you meant any lore in specific so I'm gonna take this as an opportunity to just dump all the shit I made up in my brain peace and love <333333

so like the main stuff I made up I guess would be the repomums which again was a cocreation with my darling precious @slydiddledeedee the lore is very basically they were all in an opera troupe with mag and marni and were cursed by god to die if they ever slept with an italian man. they also all left rotti for nathan, rotti kind of picked them off one by one like he'd marry one of them she'd leave him and die and he'd get a new one. no one present recognised the pattern of this. they're all colour coordinated which is a thing I like to do for the largo kids when I draw them so I guess it's genetic idk. important fun fact is that luigi personally killed his mum and was then lobotomised just a little bit which is why I keep drawing him with that big ole head scar.

other thing I made up was lore for the random zydrate lady as part of a larger effort to make shit up abt graverobber. most of my ideas for her are vague also not at all based in the movie I need to stress this is basically just an oc that I borrowed a character from the movie for. n ee way the story kind of goes she and graves start off in the drug dealer/drug addict business at the same time and they're roomies sometimes when they can afford it. she'll usually be more involved in whatever post movie ideas are floating around in my head at the moment bc I do feel like it's important to get a perspective that more like. on the ground if that makes sense?? bc like no one in the movie is super affected by the repossession system as much as I would like to see so she's my hero she's my class struggle queen.

speaking of graves I have so many ideas abt him in my head like the way I cope with the existence of scary scary evil wicked terrence is I just completely redesign him like moreseo than any of the other characters. to ME he's a freaky evil little dyke he probably was on whatever supercharged t repoworld has for a week or two but couldn't afford any more than that but like I said the t was supercharged so he can still sing his parts peace and love. I like to personally give him an actual concrete geneco debt bc like obv he has to have one but I would like it spelled out please just to have gramber relationship drama. think it would be funny if his heart gave out on him and he has a synthetic one, once again this is all for gramber relationship drama. in my brain he has been kind of fixated on her ever since he was a kid (see this piece). I also do like to give him and shilo kind of a sibling thing going on for literally no other reason than I like sibling dynamics I think they're delightful. I think post movie shilo should start an awful band and he should peddle her cds to his customers.

I have sooo many thoughts on the largo siblings like I said luigi straight up murdered his mother probably when he was very young. the way I picture it he's always been pretty unstable and wouldn't have been made as much of a public figure, unlike amber and pavi who I picture as having been like legit child stars at some point. like idk the way I picture it rotti would almost publicise them more after having to keep luigi that much out of the public eye since he's yknow. insane. I like to lean more into the opera vibes and give them little ballet shoes and shit like for some reason I always picture them as dancers. n ee way I think growing out of child stardom hit amber the hardest, not that would have coped super well either. pavi at least in the movie seems to have kind of a place at the table when they talk abt who's to inherent and like we usually see him at rotti's side while amber is usually out on her own and like idk it's kind of impossible not to read it as gendered to ME. also I always need to stress I don't make their backstories sad to make them sympathetic I do it bc I'm thoroughly successionpilled thank you and goodnight.

don't have that many thoughts on shilo and nathan, esp on nathan I moreso just have critiques of how he's written like icl I find the jekyll and hyde routine sooo uninspired. like idk I just think he becomes that much more horrifying of a character if you picture him as more calculated in his violence. I also just think it's kind of lame how little talk there seems to be abt the fact that he is like severely abusive to shilo like it's such a huge part of the movie I feel like it maybe becomes a bit too obvious to talk abt if that makes sense? like it's such a fact of life but whenever I start thinking about it for too long I want to scream like beyond the poison thing which like would be enough on its own the way he gaslights and hits her is literally scary and I just feel like a lot of that horror gets lost when he's depicted as like. sometimes not being in full control like it sort of takes away his agency and in turn a lot of the impact of his character, at least to me.

as for shilo like I said not many thoughts I'm mostly just interested in where she'd go post movie like I said I want her to start a shitty band I feel like that could heal her. also want her to lose the wig like idk could be symbolic maybe 👍

[fandomsnstuff]

We're moving so i did So Much today to prep my room for staging or whatever, i didnt even get to writing until like. 9:30 or 10, so it's short and sweet today, posted with just over an hour to spare

@taznovembercelebration

Day 12: coworkers au

Lup's just trying to help Magnus out and make a little extra pocket change. Why does shit always have to go sour?

Read it on AO3

When Magnus first proposed his idea for a winter time side hustle, Lup didn't think it'd really get off the ground. Who was going to pay to have someone put up their outdoor Candlenights decorations for them? Decorating is half the fun of the season. But she agreed to help when she could.

Turns out, a lot of people will pay for it. They had to introduce a service to just put lights along the eavestroughs. People hate doing that shit, but she and Magnus run like a well oiled machine. Neither of them necessarily need the money, but it's a nice little bonus to end the ear. Plus it gets them outside during the few hours of sunlight. Take that, seasonal depression.

Lup's up on a ladder, adjusting some of the attachments along one part of the house. Magnus is somewhere nearby, fiddling with another string, trying to untie the knot it tied itself into over the past ten months in storage. “We wrap these up nicely, don't we?” He says. “Every year, we bundle them up so we don't have to do this, and every year they're impossible!”

Lup attaches a few extra hooks to the house. “Just give it a good shake, they'll sort themselves out.” She hears the jingling of little lightbulbs clinking against each other, and Magnus exclaims happily. “Told you.” She snaps the string she's working on into the new hooks. “Alright, Mags. Give that a tug.”

Magnus plus his untangled string into the end of hers, and pulls gently on the join. The droops in the string pull taut, and the lights hang perfectly straight down. Lup nods, satisfied.

She's taken two steps down the ladder when her foot slips. She tries to throw her hands out behind her, but she lands hard against the frozen ground. “Holy shit!” Mangus runs over and drops to his knees by her side. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” she says unconvincingly, “just waiting for the sky to stop spinning.”

Magnus inhales sharply. “Alright, uh, I'm gonna call 911.”

“You don't have to do that.”

“No, I super do. Because, one, you just fell off a ladder onto dirt that's been frozen solid, without any snow to break your fall, and two,” he pauses, and she can see him cringe, “I, uh, don't think your elbow's supposed to bend like that.”

She cranes her neck up to look, and she really wishes she hadn't. Her arm is laying in a way it really shouldn't be. She drops her head back against the ground. “Why doesn't it hurt?”

“Shock, probably? Just- don't move.”

“Roger.”

By the time the ambulance shows up, it hurts. The paramedics do whatever tests they have to. She wiggles her fingers and toes, she knows her name, where she is, the date, the president, all that good stuff. They stabilise her arm and load her up. Magnus stays behind so he can drive his truck and meet her at the hospital.

Once there, they do some x-rays and it turns out she fucked up her arm real bad. No concussion, thankfully. They set the bone, which hurts like a bitch, but she gets a pink cast out of it.

“I always wanted to break a bone when I was younger,” Magnus says as the nurse wraps Lup's arm in the hot pink material.

The nurse laughs. “That's pretty common.”

“I dreamed of having a red cast. Like, firetruck red. And everybody at school would see my cool red cast and sign it.”

“I'm living my dreams, babe,” Lup says. “Hot pink cast for the win.”

“Hell yeah.” He high fives her good hand.

She looks back at the nurse, “how long do I have to wear this anyway?”

“With the complexity of the break, it could be six to eight weeks."

“Eight weeks?!”

“Maybe more, if an x-ray shows that it's shifted or not healing properly.”

“It didn't feel like kids had casts on for that long in elementary school,” Magnus says.

“Simpler breaks don't need as long.”

“Damn.” She looks at Magnus, “I don't think I'll be going up any ladders any time soon.”

“Yeah, god, please don't.”

[cult-of-the-eye]

MAG 82 let's gooooo

Ok we're gonna get some answers as to what the fuck is happening here nice nice

DAISY MY BELOVED

God I love scary women

Martin's more clever than people give him credit for I think, he immediately notices something is up with this new case and the way daisy is handling it even if he doesn't know what to do about it

He seems like a huge mess my poor dude, he's desperate to believe its not Jon who killed leitner but he's running out of options and answers and hes going about it the right way, by trying to involve Tim and talk about it to figure out a plan but Tim's too wrapped up in his hatred of the situation to try and get out of it

I love him so much I understand the ACAB Martin memes now

Underneath it all, he's just as desperate as desperate as Tim and as much as it seems like he's trying to deal with it constructively, he's putting his faith in the police by sticking with his Michael and Helen story even though they've literally been like yeah we can do whatever we want here

Omg I forgot basira quit!! It seems like she cared about her

Martin K Blackwood being told "everyone I've talked to says you and him were close" literally giggling and kicking his feet

Were they close? I feel like she was mostly saying that to get a reaction from him but I guess Martin did do his little Jon check ups so there's that

Imagine getting framed for someone's murder and then finding out your coworkers were all like yeah bitch had no friends...

NO WAIT THEY DONT KNOW ABOUT SASHA OH MY GOD

TIMOTHY I LOVE YOU

ELIAS MY BELOVED

When he gets back??? What do you mean by that Elias???

I'm so confused why is he being terrible at framing him?? Like just fucking say he did it, why all the dancing around like yeah he could never kill someone but I hope he could??

WHATS SO FUCKING FUNNY ELIAS

YES DAISY DRAG HIM

(although I feel like Elias gets stronger every time he's called a weird little freak)

ALICE???????

Oh my god I understand now we do know why she's called daisy and it is sad

Oh my god I can feel her rage through the screen

Ha Elias calling it a strange musty place as if he isn't the head of this strange musty place

Oh he's such a bastard

STATEMENT NEVER GIVEN OH THAT FUCKS SEVERELY

Oh my god daisy backstory

Oh my god I can imagine how fucking shitty it must feel to have your story be told by this random weirdo freak who absolutely shouldn't know this and the dissonance of him speaking as you, saying how you felt and saying the words "I like to feel strong. To be in control", while wrenching the control from your very hands

Oh my god I could rave about the "that's why it was my fault" "it wasn't my fault" FOR HOURS. Does Elias want her to think it was her fault? I don't think so, cause the statements tend to be truths, so I guess daisy actually does believe it's her fault underneath it all but has attempted to convince herself over the years it wasn't actually her fault

So then feeling that ripped away at that moment must've been fucking terrifying, like you've been slowly plastering a wall over and over again over years and then someone comes and bulldozes it

OMG YOU CANT KNOW THAT. she's accepted that he's telling the truth and that he does know and that she did feel that excitement, so she might be very quickly adapting to what she thinks might be the best course of action, which is going along with Elias or she refuses to accept that the event was her fault but she has no problem accepting that she felt excited seeing the bodies

I guess accepting it was her fault would be a sign of vulnerability right but accepting the excitement is a show of a kind of secretive power

He can't know how terrible she is cause then the secretive bit is taken away, which then takes away from her power

Her whole thing is that she can do whatever she wants when the police department doesn't care, but Elias knows and is threatening to tell them and therefore remove her power

Oh my god she's so interesting I want to study her under a microscope

Jesus Christ that's fucking horrifying

"you've made your point" god she wants it to stop but she's still keeping up pretences of power, she's flipping between horror and fury in response to Elias

It's so interesting the power dynamics here, it's two people used to being the most powerful in the room, one because of the lack other people's knowledge of what she does and the other because of his knowledge of what other people do and in this scenario, Elias obviously wins out and it's clearly the first time she's encountered this kind of struggle and therefore lost a struggle

Which adds to her violent and terrified reaction

WHY DID SHE KILL HIM??? WHAT

SHES KILLED MORE PEOPLE???

Id let her do whatever she wanted to me

"Does close the case and move on" mean pin it on Jon??

KILL HIM QUICKLY???? WHAT

"there's not telling what he might be capable of"????? BITCH YOU SAID HE DIDNT HAVE THE STOMACH FOR MURDER

WHAT

Why doesnt daisy notice his obvious lying???

Is she so rattled by him giving her statement???

YESSSSS I HOPE SHE KILLS HIM I SUPPORT WOMENS WRONGS

God damn that was such a badass way of saying that

TIM NO

I think part of Tim does believe Jon didn't kill Sasha

Tim just wants Martin to show a little bit of anger at the situation, to show that he's not alone in feeling the injustice, cause I guess to him it seems like Martins just taken it all in his stride, he's just been like yeah this is happening now (maybe it's a different type of trauma response? Having to move on cause what other choice is there) which totally makes sense for Tim

Oh god SASHAAAAAAAA

Hmm wonder what could've been said for Michael to come across as "Working with Jon" as opposed to "stabbed him in the shoulder and has been a generally nuisance all season"

[paramorearchived]

April 5, 2011

Transcript:

Like Eli.. I deed it.

Hey everybody today, let's dive into the discussion of sexuality! yeah yeah, i wanna talk about the cosmo cover. it's a little more than a big deal to me. and you know what? i'm really excited about it. to the general public, cosmo magazine is either a) a woman's obsession or b) a woman's demise -- honestly, either of the two options equal out to be the same damn thing! the media clearly has our attention. it's easy to let all the images of all these godlike looking women whisper to us how we think we're supposed to look. it's like "here look at my BOOBS! don't you wish you had these?" "more guys will like you if you do it THIS WAY!" "get this figure" blah blah blah spend all your time, energy, and money on becoming the world's idea of ''sexy"... and you know what? it's never gonna change. as much as i tell myself i don't care and i wear whatever i want... there will always be those moments when i'm at the check out line at target and i see some gorgeous person on the cover of any ol rag... and i'm like "ugh, is that how it's gotta be!?" only to realize that... next month, that girl on the cover is gonna be me. 

WHAT A HYPOCRITE RIGHT?!?!

noooo. here's the thing. my #1 goal when the band began was to make myself invisible. not only did i not want to be the focal point, i wanted to be UNSEEN! and honestly, it never made a difference. i've turned down a lot of magazine covers. i specifically remember turning down Blender mag when i turned 19. and you know what? no one ever knew. it never made people focus on me any less. and it never mattered. so this time i'm taking a different approach. all 3 of us in Paramore have our own roles. and finally i will accept mine. i'm going to be okay with being a "powerful female". and if that's what it is... i'm going to use that role to make a difference.  here's the plan. here's my course of action. i WILL be myself. i WILL grow up. and i most definitely WILL find the time in my own life to be SEXY if i feel like it. who wrote the rules? who said that a girl that lives in this same tshirt and jeans nearly every day won't wanna wear pumps and a short skirt tomorrow? the heart that's underneath the clothes is still the same. because to me, it's not about using sex as a weapon. it's about how i feel. somedays i straight up feel like wearing sweats. other days, more confident days.. i'm like... DUDE WHO NEEDS CLOTHES!? ok well, i'm not that extreme but hopefully you see my point. if you are a girl, i think you'll understand all of these words just fine. you know those mornings you get out of the shower and you're drying your hair in your underwearsss and you realize you finally don't care that you have that scar on your leg? or that your skin is so pale that sometimes in bad light you can see your veins? ... or when your skin keeps breaking out and you're like "today, i simply do not give a f***!" those are the liberated moments that i try to hold on to. and i'm hoping by seeing my crazy mug on a magazine cover... some girl who's having a not particularly liberated day will think to herself that the MAY cover looks just a little different than the usual cosmo cover and hopefully they can even be inspired. no, i don't think i'm some kind of saving grace that's going to change the magazine world and the lies that we believe in the headlines every day. but i do know that i NEVER ever thought of myself as conventionally beautiful nor sexy. and only just recently did i ever even begin to accept how my looks differ from other people's whom i admire. i'm hoping that the more a magazine will take a chance on a girl like me, the more a girl will have a frickin chance in hell to be UNIQUE, powerful, strong in her weaknesses, confident in her flaws. because that's who i'm trying to become. 

sexy is whatever you want it to be. don't let cosmo tell you. don't let vogue tell you. even your boyfriend or your best friends. the point is, it's up to you. i'm gonna make up my own version as i go. 

and for the record, i really was hoping one of the headlines would be "69 ways to 69" but i guess it was a no go. honestly, i don't think they could come up with that many. thank you guys once again for being a part of our family. love every one of ya. 

hayley

-- once again, i didn't proofread ;////

[serenstars]

bg3 posting

am i gonna reblog anything here? idk maybe. mostly this is for posting thoughts and screenshots of my characters tho :p

list of my tavs n durges under the cut

Aeron, she/her mephistopheles tiefling rogue (thief) bard (subclass not unlocked yet) urchin chaotic neutral romancing Astarion tragically separated from her large family as a small child, swept away by the bustling crowds of the marketplace; she has since scraped together a living in whatever way she could. taking on odd jobs from anyone who would hire her eventually led to shadier and shadier business, until she found herself smuggling drugs and stolen goods and trading her body in exchange for shelter, information, and cash when she needed to.

Vesper, he/him seldarine drow druid (circle of spores) bard (college of swords) durge chaotic good romancing Gale (multiplayer with @talfrynn's Zevan) struggling to piece together his past, Vesper has no idea where he's come from, how he got here, or who he even really is; what he does know is that the dark thoughts and desires that plague him (and uncontrollable violent actions that seem to come from them on occasion) are not- CANNOT be a part of who he is.

"Ceri", she/him mephistopheles tiefling sorcerer (draconic bloodline - blue) charlatan neutral evil (multiplayer with @sorcedin's Shishko) bearing a striking resemblance to a famous musician known as Ceri, this conwoman has spent her adult life using that resemblance to her advantage. by fooling people into thinking she IS the real Ceri (simply out of her typical silvery stage makeup), she's found herself capable of scamming folks into buying overpriced forgeries of autographs, or simply giving her almost anything she asks for. encouraged by a circle of criminals she's unfortunately fallen in with, she's kept the lie up so long that she's not sure whether or not the real her is still in there somewhere.

Fluttershy, she/her asmodeus tiefling druid (circle of the moon) outlander true neutral romancing Wyll (would be in a polycule with Karlach and Astarion if there was a functional way to do this in the game) still working on it give me a bit ok. she turns into bear

Hyacinth, they/them mephistopheles tiefling warlock (archfey) durge lawful evil probably gonna restart this file...was originally Very Awful but i think i'm gonna dial it back to just being pretty rude and being driven by curiosity and a desire for information and entertainment. sometimes they do bad things, sometimes they do good things; it's entirely dependent on what they think will have the most fun results, or give them the most information.

Mag, she/her lightfoot halfling paladin (oath of the ancients) soldier iirc? neutral good romancing Karlach Mag has lived her entire life by the sea, and even when she's apart from it she conducts herself by its rules. raised by and around all manner of seafaring folk, she's brash and rowdy with the manners of a sailor; but if you look past that you can see her heart of gold and noble dedication to fairness and kindness.

Calliope, she/it copper dragonborn bard (college of valour) durge chaotic neutral romancing Astarion rather than being disgusted, entertained, or curious about her urge, Calliope is simply clueless. she's lost her memories, which also removes all social context as to what is and isn't normal for a person to want, or do. she looks to others to try to rebuild that context and get a grasp on whether these thoughts and urges are strange, or simply something that is part of being alive.

[chainlxnk]

SLIP??????

The way slip got all stutter-y when he pulled out the surprise feast for peter was so cuuttteeee

i'm so glad that Mag is dead bc if he wasn't i'd want to murder his so bad

"if that isn't home, where is? I dont think i've answered that yet, it feels like I never will."

Slip is not very good at this whole comforting people thing is he lmao

"our emotions are mostly silly, that doesn't make them any less real" AAAAAAAAAAAAA

ahhhhhh Nureyev sounds so mad at Juno :(

"I couldn't think of a single goddamn thing worth saying"

MY HEARRRRTTTTTTT

the whispered argument is so funn-

"i do not want to see you anymore juno" wait huh wait wait wait wait no wait what

I am actually literally crying rn

"then it over between us, you hear me juno? over." He is being so fucking harsh

"look at this face! is this the face of a guy you'd want to see dead? cause I wouldn't be nearly as pretty dead. ...... Nureyev?"

"Unlesss....." "NO unless!"

"Rita. well thank goodness someone with a brain was involved in this travesty" god he's being so meannn

"is this making any sense? would you like me to go slower?" I love when Juno is a sarcastic ass. he's certainly gonna give as good as he gets

"Then it hit me like a mega heifer that i'd probably never get to see him do that again" I'm gonna fucking sob

"it would be my fault, and i didn't think I could live with that. SO i decided to die with it instead." FFS JUNO

RITA'S CACKLE OHMY GOD

her calling them out for bickering non-stop lmao

"nevermind i found the perfect thing!" *rock music starts blaring*

Juno going "ew no" when Rita asked if either of them had ever watched sports is so real

this whole zero-gravity fight thing sorta reminds me of that scene in the Arcane finale

"then I'm coming with you" "Juno-" "i'm coming with you"

"I just- i care about you. I worry about you." "You spend all your energy paddling to keep your head above water and you don't have any left to actually swim. But you can't paddle forever, and if you don't get to land eventually... you're gonna drown. I don't want that for you. So just know that whatever's on the other side of this door... I'll help you with it. I want to be a part of it. Because even if you never want to see me again... I want you to be okay." MOTHERFUCKER MY HEART

"Juno, get out of my way. Please." I'm gonna scream.

holy shit what oh my god

HOLYYY SHIITTTTTTTT

"I had no idea what he'd do. I only knew I'd be there to see it through" smth smth undying loyalty

they're killing me brutally

the way that brought tears to my eyes I was not okay "I do not want to see you anymore Juno" ILL JS DIE THEN??? everything went downhill so fast like can we slow down😭

[landscaping-your-mind]

MEAT TIME MEAT TIME MEAT TIME MEAT TIME

Howdy, I'm Dolphin Landscaping-Your-Mind and I'm a fan of The Flesh tma.

@a-mag-a-day

(Ramble ahead)

GERTRUDE If that's your primary goal, my dear, I would suggest you speak to a qualified counsellor. We can suggest one if you like? That said, I do believe most people find the process of giving a statement to be rather... cathartic. And whatever nightmares your experience has left you with, I'm sure they won't be bothering you much longer.

(MAG 130 - Flesh)

ARCHIVIST Yes, Basira, he is. And I am sorry about that. But we needed it. Anyway, you're the one who wants to be like Gertrude. You think she'd give a damn about a few bad dreams?

(MAG 141 - Doomed Voyage)

*stares directly into the camera*

Still, Jon, not cool. Gertrude... you're not like Gertrude. And I don't think she was bad -- I don't think she was good either, I just think that she was doing what she thought would save the world.

Still, at the end of the day, I did it for me, not for her. She's gone. There isn't anything but us.

Isn't that a Flesh thing? That there isn't anything that separates us from other animals, that when we die there isn't any special afterlife to house us, that we just die with our bodies?

Chewed and crushed together, it was impossible to tell what had once been animal and what might have once been us. It was all just meat.

The fear of being meat, of seeing a corpse and knowing it will be you, it is you. The fear of death, of one day becoming a lifeless unmoving corpse. The disgust at flesh and meat, at rotting flesh and meat. Insignificance. Pointlessness.

The Flesh isn't just The Flesh. Like Gerry said, colours.

Also worth watching out for any additional esoteric fallout from the ritual attempt, like that Carlisle boy down in Wandsworth.

Like here! Toby Carlisle was scary to me because of the rotting part of it, less so because of the meat, though it was the thing that was spooky. Idk. Corruption, fear of rotting, that fit.

What was that she said, "The siren call of flesh?" Hm. It's possible, I suppose. It would hurt, but... Well, what's another scar?

JON.

JONATHAN SIMS.

:(

I'm not ready for MAG 131.

--

ALSO i have thoughts about the flesh and christianity, so uh, stay tuned for that ig! uh yea, ramble over.

the flesh tma my absolute beloved im gonna be sooo normal tomorrow.

[selfcareparker]

(lovely anon) i'm so happy to finally be answering this oh my goodness hi gorgeous human being i feel that it has been too long 🥲 SO MUCH HAS HAPPENED SINCE THE LAST TIME I'VE WRITTEN ONE OF THESE HOW HAVE YOU BEEN

to answer the things you have said most recently- i'm so mad that spring break is over bc now i have to go back to life??? like dancing and school and shit that feels so unnessacry 😭 and like i can't just do nothing anymore? i was so used to it and now...... ugh. i STILL haven't played sims (i think it's because ✨depression✨ be hitting sometimes) lol but MWAHAH IM SO HAPPY FOR YOUR NEIGHBOR!AU AND THAT THEY HAD LITTLE BABY LEO!! i feel the name thing.. i just come up with something that sounds nice? i think leo is a nice name, it makes me think about lea michele and the fact that her son's name is Ever Leo but anyway. i don't name my sims after what i want to name my children irl either... idk why though. (i don't know why i'm telling you this but for boy names i love Liam🥰 and if i had twin boys i think i would do Liam and Peter though i am not married to the name Peter.... anywho)

LMAOOO the therpaist coming made me laugh thank you :)) i hope it's helpful? this may be tmi but i've only really had negative thoughts recently and not many healthy outlets so i'm hoping crossing one thing off this sad list will make me feel better :') i think during spring break my anxiety and my depression really spiked? idk, it comes in episodes but yeah THIS GOT REALLY SAD

i think a lot of things when i read your posts but i never say them hahaha so imma say it now: i googled what bon appetit meant ( i also just had to google how to spell it ) but ur right, i feel like bone apple tea makes more sense than bone apple teeth.. the "th" is throwing me off bc how i say it bone appa (like app-a) teet (like you're saying tit but teet lol) so bone apple tea makes more sense to me lol

i never know really know the time difference for anything lmao but est to germany (that's not gmt is it?) is like 6 hours wOAH so it's like 9pm while it’s 3pm here? wowee

i feel mega weird after watching this show called hollywood (darren criss is in it, so is laura harrier and a bunch of other people) but i don't like it💀 i feel really icky rn and idk why but reading your last response to my ask (?) always makes me feel better :')

i am doing what you said btw, i'm typing this on my computer first then gonna transfer it to my phone's tumblr lol but when you said a digital detox, it's interesting cuz i feel like i've been having one since tom's new project was announced? gOD i don't wanna get into it bc i get so triggered but i've been off of instagram since then bc instagram stans literally stand by tom through whatever even when something ain't right- i’m just gonna leave it there bc i’ll continue the rant, but yeah so i took a break lol

also heard abt your driving lesson thing (?) was it that bad? i can't find the old post but someone asked if you hooked up with your lesson person and i was sOOO CONFUSED LMAOO LIKE OK ARIA GET SOME BUT UHH HUH?

now to address the actual response HAHA the way you touch my heart :') by :') bringing :') up :') halle :') being ariel :') (i honest to God don't remember if i brought this up first, forgive me if i did, it's been a minute lmao) i'm always talking about it and i'm pretty sure my family is so tired of me talking about it lmao, but YEAH when i found out they weren't twins i was so surprised but idk why i always thought they were twins? but YOU ARE SPEAKING MY LANGUAGE WITH THE DISNEY TALK- everyone is always like "tiana is my favorite princess" and yea she's strong and stuff but...... she was a frog. for almost the whole time. it's about time we got another one!! i do agree with some people on the fact that disney should just make another black princess but halle is adorable and i was ariel on stage so it's already really special to me :')

yeah lol there are good times with my brothers but they make me mad for a good portion of the time (there's the 12yo vincent and the 7yo daniel but vincent??? psshhh he is a piece of work and i'm not sure how much longer i can put up with him HAJAH AND YES VINCENT IS THE ONE WHO WAS 👁👄👁WHEN I CRIED AND THE ONE WHO DOESN'T LISTEN TO MUSIC- writing this now makes it sound like vincent is awful. which he isn't... we're working on him ig. not to add to the awfulness but no, he listens to obnoxious loud VIDEO GAME MUSIC and won't stop when we ask him to stop... he gets beat up a lot) anyway i imagine being an only child is really calming.. like you have time to yourself and its just you and your parents 😌

yeah let me know if you end up watching it (wandavision)! i think it's great but if you like it lmk!! tfatws is sooo good like PHEW i am honestly loving it. sidenote: j*hn w*lker makes me wanna jump through the screen and choke him to the ground. i was thinking right, and the falcon and the winter soldier (THATS SO MUCH EASIER FAJHKDAH) would techinally be like a 10 hour movie right? because every episode is an hour long and there'll be 10 episodes? like wow. i get what you mean though, abt the racism in the show etc, like looking forward to it but not like..... no i get what you mean i will not try and give another example lol but you make me wanna learn more languages like really badly (bc of what you said about the german to american translation) & if you end up watching hamilton PLEASE LMK ABT THAT TOO HAHAHA i love it so much, same thing with lion king lmaoo

speaking of germany, i was at lunch on saturday with my mom and her friend and we were talking about my schooling and like-- she planted this idea in my head lol like what if i just got my GED and went around the world (to england probably) to get a theatre experience??? and i think it sounds so cool but no where near practical lol, it's just..... the dream haha and i would then try and learn a language 😉

uh yes we absolutely should order basically a resturant meal at a cinema, how about burgers, chips (fries), and a large drink? any time next week works for me, should i pick you up?

also about cherry (which i still haven't watched yet lol) i got the timestamps from tumblr😌 i couldn't find them anywhere else, but i agree, i probably wouldn't even look twice at cherry if tom wasn't in it? like i liked tdatt a lot, but it's not a movie i would be itching to see ya know?

HAHAHAHA THE 24 HOUR NOTIFICATION- i think i have around 1030 hours on sims? but i've had it since 2019 lmao (reading the screenshots, yes u are 100% a genuis, i take screenshots too but on anon you can't upload them so i just read them and retype what i wrote lmao) i think the university experience in the game is fun, but time consuming and it's all work imo. idk why i do it so often tho 😭😭😭

and agreed!! when you're making good money in the game you have to find other ways to make it interesting. my cousins who play it just continously do "motherlode" and i'm like.... then what do you do in your game?? it just sounds boring to me... my current sims household, i had a famous comedian sim, her name was dylan, aND SORRY IM LAUGHING SO HARD WHILE WRITING THIS BC ITS A GREAT EXAMPLE OF THE UNI THING UNLESS IM JUST DUMB, she went to college for communications when i wanted her to be a comedian and when she graduated i realized that degree did nothing for the career 🥲 so yeah, i think i'm just dumb. but she had a kid in college, guy didn't stick around and she was pretty broke HA but then she got married to this (great) guy named steve, made good bank, had 5 more kids (two sets of twins and one more lol) but then she passed. uhm... yeah that's still an open wound . lol i'm kidding, but when you get rich like that, you have to find a way to make the game interesting and i chose a million kids.

(this was one giant paragraph until i broke it up uhh yeah) i seriously don't pay attention to the sims prices and just end up spending way too much money and not being able to finish the rest of the house😭 but then again, i'm so used to having sims live in apartments... if i end up building a house FIRST OF ALL it'll look like what you explained before lmao but i'll tell you if i actually end up building a house HAHA & planning out your sims game is so fun to me lol, did enisa and michael take in his daughter yet? i may be thinking too far ahead lol and i love that they fucked woohooed (i say woo woo lol) in celebration HAHA but when i was playing with this one couple i had them woo woo every night hoping the dude would have horrible pull out game and they would concieve, but one night they were too tired and i was like why? get back in there man. if i was in college and lived with my partner we would be fucking every night homie. be grateful. i have been talking a lot about sims, and like you said: enough 💀 i just love this game a lot 😭😭

SORRY LAST THING i think the sims romantic and sexual stuff is so nice bc its what i want?? LMAO IDK like the whole hot tub thing you're talking about- puh lease ITS JUST NICE TO SEE OKAY

i'm reading the german section over again and i said aloud "my german friend is so cool" lol (i was saying that to my brothers & i know they don't care LMAO) (& i'm glad the uni zoom call went well!!) so on a form, in german, it could possibily say Einführungsveranstaltungsteilnehmer because you would be a participant to an introductory event? i swear german sounds so cool 😌 but i love reading your german lessons!! it's really interesting, most of the time my brain can't comprehend it tho?? like that word makes sense to you, but i need a translation. like to be able to look at that and know what it says.... its just appealing and seems so cool lol i kinda wanna write something out in german but i feel that google translate will fail me. während googeln "google übersetzen" mein Computer war so verdammt langsam und es fühlte sich einfach wie etwas Gutes auf Deutsch zu sagen. ich bin nicht sicher, welches Wort ist "fucking", aber ich mag es lmao (did it fail me like i thought it would??)

LMAOOO THANK YOU FOR BRINGING UP JUSTIN BC WHILE AT THE RESTURANT THEY PLAYED A JUSTIN SONG AND I IMMEDIATELY THOUGHT OF YOU AND THIS STORY😭 lol i was thinking it's depending on your age but not even that either... i really don't know.... but tom's fans are hollanders💀 i would consider myself one? he's the only person i'm really into like that (like a lot lol) so idk lmao (directioners 💔💔the pain is real)

LMAOOO (both of these paragraphs started off with “lmaooo” smh) "i like my men when they look like they are on the brink of death" PLEASE, i don't like pete's blonde hair... i just don't. i'm not sure if i wasn't watching the most recent snls but yea. my mom thinks he looks like trash, but i think he's okay? like he said staten island people just look like trash LMAO and I STILL HAVEN'T SEEN KING OF STATEN ISLAND GIRL I ALMOST FORGOT ABOUT THAT!! now i'm gonna make plans to watch it lmao, & yes agreed i find pete hot, don't ask why i really couldn't explain it to someone he's just .

my favorite songs from rex are from pony oh my goodness 🥺 anywho i'm gonna go eat cereal (i ended up eating bun and cheese instead) and listen to the Stormzy songs you recommended... aria. aria aria aria. i would like to thank you for introducing me to stormzy i- i don't have any words or any emojis to express HOW GOOD STORMZY IS. i hope he's popular in germany/the uk because i haven't heard of him but GURLLLL

one second - delicious i love it. it's really good. it’s not my favorite from the album, but its great.

superheroes - at first i played the non-explicit one (on accident) and wondered why the words weren't playing but i was reading them in the lyrics??? THIS ONE THOUGH??? IS THE BEST SONG I THINK I'VE EVER HEARD. i am so SO SO into black people empowering songs (like brown skin girl by beyonce) and this song???? PHEW I CRYYYYY ITS SO GOOD.... i was gonna quote some lyrics BUT THERS TOO MANY I LOVE, "i am young, black, beautiful, and brave" "black queen, you're immaculate, it's coming at the world, they ain't ready for your magic yet, and that was never your fault" THAT WAS NEVER YOUR FAULT- I ALMOST CRIED THIS SONG IS SO BEAUTIFUL (i played it twice lol)

lessons is another beautiful one, like its slow and it feels intimate and nurturing and just OO chefs kiss, beautiful . like you can feel the apology and the regret... it’s so good

own it - OWN IT OWN IT OWN IT IS AMAZING!! swear you would catch me dancing to this song, this song is so fucking good i cannot comprehend like this one might be my favorite for real... "it's the way you wind up your waist, i'm so in awe, you never have to worry abt nothing, you know its yours, you know you own it" 🥲 i played it two or three times honestly

rachael's little brother - YES I DID LISTEN TO IT LMAO AND YES I LIKE IT, its a very complex song and it's very layered in terms of emotions i think and i really like that about it. i probably won't listen to it that often, but its really good. i would recommend this song to my "older brother" bc he would just absolutely love this

shut up - i was taking this song seriously (also very good) until i heard him say shu-T up LMAO, this one is good, i probably wouldn't listen to it 24/7 like rachael's little brother but honestly its still fire

before listening to blinded by your grace and vossi bop, i know you brought up the religion bit, i definitely don't mind that, especially because i'm Christian lol and i actually liked that he brought up God in some of his songs like idk i just like it🥰🥰

(i then went to bed after that lol but first thing in the morning i listened to superheroes and... that song is probably my favorite tbh, i was gonna write MORE quotes that i loved from it but, yeah no there's too many. if you want i'll tell you lmao but this is already so long i would just be quoting the whole friggin song)

VOSSI BOP IS A BOP (lol) I CANT EVEN LIE, i love a song that hypes up a dude's girl so the line- i love that my phone decided to fail to load the lyrics, lemme google it, okay the lyric "looking at my girl like what a goddess" i was like AYEEE its honestly just really good. and no one in america says "sauce" like "i've got the sauce" but now i do (thanks to love island and Nas from last season) and now stormzy so (also im gonna watch the music video for superheroes bc it looks great so 😛)

(because this is already so long i feel like i shouldn't finish the rest but . no i'm gonna do it)

now for blinded by your grace pt2 idk why i’m nervous lmaoo PAUSE I'M NOT EVEN DONE WITH THE SONG GIRL THIS SONG IS *chefs kiss* no words, speechless PHEW y'all gon make me start jumping around. why did i not know about stormzy before, he is amazing i- ok yeah i finished the song, all i have to say is that Stormzy is immaclucate. period. i am literally sending his music to all my friends he is..... amazing

you want my song recommendations 🥺🥺 hmm uh okay lol i listen to a lot of old music, whitney houston, marvin gaye, queen, celine dion, i love "more than words" by extreme uhmm okay, but for actual music i listen to on the daily? (this is a lot of different music like.... they do not go together lmao so be prepared) a song about being sad by rex orange county, betty by taylor swift and lover by taylor swift and... most of that album lol, treasure by bruno mars lmao, OOOO and versace on the floor by bruno as well, lazybaby by dove cameron, creep by tlc has been on repeat lol, deja vu by olivia rodrigo (i saw what you said about drivers license and AGREED LMAO but i like deja vu a lot more haha) and two albums that i listen to in general, rare by selena gomez and ungodly hour by chloe x halle 🥰 you don't have to listen to all of them or any of them lol but that's a sense of what i'm into :) so basically everything haha, i'm into literally every single kind of music really so i wasn't too surprised that i enjoyed stormzy :’)

HAHASBSJHAHA your h20 story cracked me up,, like "wow these actors are so dedicated, learning german just for us" 😭 the beauty of overdubbing

once again, math and maths, in my mind maths makes sense because its mathmatics, but saying maths doesn't feel right to me lol, like if i said maths i feel like everyone would look at me like ??? and yea i was taught it as math so its just more natural for me. but yes math/maths is disgusting, easily one of my least favorite subjects so .

mkay. i- the first time i read this i could not contain my laughter when you said the only pollen you know is sex pollen LMAOKOOSHBABJFAJF STOPPP I'M EVEN LAUGHING WRITING THIS,, anyway. wow! that's interesting, my dad (<<< mostly anything else) gets migraines from the sun and the heat and stuff, yesterday (sunday, i was outside for like hours watching my brothers play football, the american kind lol) i was in the sun for like ever and i got a headache😔

summer clothes🥲 i need to go shopping fr fr. for my birthday my mom and dad got me a giftcard like dedicated to a shopping spree and we've yet to go so..... i should bring it up to my mom lol, but!! i went bra shopping (ended up returning literally all of them cuz they honestly didn't work for day to day work? its a long story) and if i could i would walk around in this new "summer bra" i got, i would. it's so fricking cute and its really light fabric (which isn't perfect for my nipples but still) so i don't get hot in it, but that bra and some shorts would be perfect. its the closest thing to being naked so

IS THE BIRD STILL BOTHERING U ARIA, TELL ME NOW ISTG, i laughed really hard that the bird isn't stupid and is really trying to torture you LMAOO like i was rolling, it wants you to suffer, badly

when you said "mensus" it was still close to mens!!! latin speaking queen 😌😌

okay STORYTIME i was reading back your response and started (fake) crying bc i love you lol and my youngest brother (daniel) gon say "oh man, catherine's crying about something we don't care about, again" I--- i swear when i tell you about them they sound awful, but they aren't that bad, just the stuff i say about them is sounds really mean LMAO

but the thing you said about being kind, same, what i always say is: don't be the person that makes people say "i hate people" ya know? like there's no reason to be a jerk or anything.... but its true 🥺🥺🥺🥺 you are really kind and every time i talk to you i would like to personally fly to germany and give you a hug 💖💕💞💗💓💝💖💘

& i'm gonna show my stretch marks some love bc of you 🥺��� i really hate how men have basically everyone conditioned that you can't love your own body </3 fuck them, y'all beautiful :')

also thanks for what you said :')) you literally are the kindest, sweetest person i think i've ever spoken to and i love you 🥰🥺🥲💓💗

READING YOUR TAGS HAHAHHAHA the spelling errors makes everything so much funnier. once again, i like your german lessons & yea!! i'm gonna play sims after writing this hahah

#catherine's tags are back #i don't think i've told you my name before?? #anyway it's catherine🥰🥰🥰 #i'm typing this on my computer (without emojis) and if i didn't edit this you would be reading shit shite like #heartface and pout and cry LMAO #yeah abt the tattoos #some stuff with my parents i'm like deal with it??? lol #my mom tells me "if there's something you enjoy or you like but i don't have the same opinion on it... why would my (my mom's) opinion matter? #and i love that #like i'm not gonna go and do whatever i want #but if my mom doesn't like that i swear (which isn't true just an example) #its like okay.... #but whatever #and your tattoo ideas sound really cute!! #and yeah @ your parents, i mean you aren't getting something wild #and the tattoo album>>> #i'm gonna look up ariana's butterfly tattoos just so i know what you mean lol #but i'm guessing you don't want something so incredibily simple, but not super like over the top? #correct me if i'm wrong lol #LMAO the tags were in order don't worry ! #and yeah lol ily2 <33 #and once again, again, sorry for this post JSHJS ITS A MESS AND LONG AS HELL #and you don't need to go in order of my post its literally longer than your german compound words #u're fine #also !!! while writing this the birds were chirping outside and i was like 😳 #and one of your fics (i’ve read all of them, i don’t remember lol) that valentine’s day one where y/n had lingerie on (the pancake one lol) #inspired me to buy lingerie #like when i look back on me “growing up” #that fic & basically you lol really helped with that #that made no sense and i don’t know how to make it make sense... but... yeah. like ily

hiiiiiiiiiii <3333

Dear catherine, 😌

(you have said your name before, but it wasn‘t like an introduction or anything i think you were talking about .... was it possibly the incident at the cinema??? And you said something like ‘calm down catherine‘ like you were telling yourself to calm down idkd dkdkkdkd anyway i didn‘t mention it cause i wasn‘t sure if it was an accident or not dkdjd but now i know 😌❤️ Catherine is such a cute and lovely name btw omg and so are your brothers‘s names 🥰

Sorry that I‘m answering this so late, it‘s been an emotional rollercoaster for me since last week but i‘ll get to that in a second lol

Sksklssk girl i haven‘t played sims in like 2 weeks now ekejdkdlldld ok that‘s not that long at all actually but i keep wanting to play but then i end up not playing for whatever reason, so no news about my sims game 😔 but i love the names Liam and Peter and for twins!!! That sounds really nice actually

okay i‘m trying to answer your ask in chronological answer even though i wanted to wait for the depressing stuff and write it at the end or something OKAY so. i thought that i‘d feel so good when i start uni and that i‘ll like... have a purpose in life again and just be happy (cause in the last year i didn‘t do much and i was depressed like half of the time lol).... anyway i kind of feel even worse now? 😭 i think it‘s because in my brain it‘s like: university!!! that means your life will change and it‘ll all be so exciting. and don‘t get me wrong it is exciting butttt..... idk the online thing is so weird cause you‘re not meeting any new people (i‘m introverted anyway but still lol) and it doesn‘t feel like you‘re listening to/talking to actual people cause it feels the same as just watching a video?

also i thought i‘d be busy again but i only have one lecture (90mins) a day and theres one day where i dont have any lectures at all and just one day where i have 3 hours but.... idk i mean i shouldn‘t complain about having so much free time but i just don‘t know what to do all day and in a pandemic there really is nothing to do but i also can‘t relax bc it‘s like during the week and i know i have uni the next day and .... yeah.

There‘s also this one assignment i had to do that took me AT LEAST SIX HOURS AND IM NOT EVEN EXAGGERATING????? so that was the only thing i‘ve been doing besides “going to“ lectures. for this one course we have to read two (really really long) texts (like it literally took me 3 hours to read them) and we‘re supposed to post it on this website that all the professors in our uni use. So after 5 days of anxiety (✌🏼) i posted mine this morning bc last night i realised that i didn‘t even know why i was having anxiety so i just posted mine today. The deadline is tomorrow at 12 and no one except me has posted theirs yet........ so i have anxiety again 🥰 cause idk if i‘m the only one who did it or if i even did it correctly

Edit while i‘m rereading this: my anxiety about uni is a lot better and i‘m not as d*pressed anymore maybe it was just hormones? idk but i‘m better so that‘s good

(I started writing this like 5 hours ago and then i randomly completely forgot lol)

I‘m in a better mood now though so let‘s move on from that (oh wait also, i think i‘m gonna see if i can find a psychiatrist bc with my anxiety symptoms (long story) i need to go to a psychiatrist, and so far i‘ve only gone to like psycholgists and it didn‘t help but i think that‘s just bc i was meant to go to a psychiatrist and not a psychologist so dldjdjsj

n e ways but yes you‘re not alone, ily, things will get better and yes i love you (i‘m not good at this type of thing🥲 but i‘d hug you right now if i could <3)

Yess i think the time difference between est and me is 6hours but gmt is uk time i believe? i think mine is called.... cet? For central european time? I could be completely wrong though lmao

Oof i completely forgot about hollywood, i remember when laura kept posting about it on instagram but i never actually watched it and i definitely won‘t now lmaodkdksjsn

Okay my driving lesson LEBDJDKDK I DID NOT HOOK UP WITH ANYONE AKSJSKSMMLM especially not my 40 or 50 year old driving instructor lol i like her but NOT LIKE THAT, the lesson was really really really good actually and i think i‘ll have my driving test soon, but i don‘t even remember why the anon would have thought that??? Oh wait now i remember okay KEKSKDLDL so during the lesson my instructor was like do you mind if i turn on some music? AND THIS WOMAN TURNED ON ONE DIRECTION I LOVE HER so i made a post about it and i said something about the song up all night and i guess i phrased it in a .... idk in a dumb way 💀 so the anon made a joke that i stayed up with my driving instructor all night and NO. No.

Wait did i read that right? YOU WERE ARIEL ON STAGE? SIALDBDJDKSLMSBDKDMDMDKDJSLSMDJFJJEDMBFEKLEFBJDLDVSIDLESKSKWKDKDJDOWNYUEKWNDUWLNSUFLWVSUDLEHDOENSIDBEISBEHENJELBSIEMWUDNRIW KB WOBE JO ON SBEUU HIII S HWS LV W ICH US KB okay this keyboard smash is getting out of hand but uh please do elaborate on that 💘😌???? Like you can‘t just drop that information and not say more??? I forgot if you‘re in like your school‘s drama group (is that a thing? lol idk anything about acting) or in an independent group? Either way - ARIEL that is so fucking cool

Your brothers loooooool, no i get it though obviously you love them and stuff but esp at their age children are so annoying so good luck with them 😭😭😭lmao

Yeah “anyway i imagine being an only child is really calming.. like you have time to yourself and its just you and your parents 😌“ yeah just me and my parents who constantly fight 🥰 lmao no i like being an only child, like i cannot imagine having siblings but i feel like if i had siblings i would be saying that i can‘t imagine being an only child so? but i do think it‘s quite different like i‘m trying to imagine having siblings and WHAT that‘s just so different omg i‘ve never really thought about it like properly ???

I saw a tik tok the other day that was like “sometimes i forget that my siblings have a life of their own. like i see them as side characters in my life“ and even though i can‘t relate obviously i felt that. lol, like i can really imagine how it feels idk what i‘m talking about like shut the fuck up, daria

(also my actual name is daria not aria but i dont like it, and also i wanted to be more anonymous on tumblr so now i‘m aria lmao. pls don‘t mention it though cause no one knows except for you and mel (peterbenjiparker) dkdkdkdnkdnd. but i‘m starting to identify with the name cause everyone keeps calling me that looool😭😭😭 (but i like the name, more than daria anyway? well it also depends on the accent, cause the way germans say daria is okay. the was Americans say it is also okay, but some of my family in England are from the north of england and i don‘t like how they say my name 💀 no offence to them(?) but yeah pls don‘t mention the name in your ask cause the chance of people seeing it is higher then (or if you want to say something about it just send a separate ask and i just won‘t post it (IDK what you‘d want to say about my name but yeah just in case slsldlldmsndnsns)

I‘m loving falcon and winter soldier so much but when i was watching an episode the week before last week (?) my laptop broke😭😭😭😭 during the scene where the dora milaje came at the end my laptop just shut down? And it had these lines all over the screen and i had to bring it to the shop where i bought it and they said it‘ll take 6-8 weeks to repair 💔💔💔 but at least it‘ll be for free, cause if i brought it back to apple it would cost like 400€ (i think that‘s nearly 500$) so yeah. but it sucks cause now i‘m “going to uni“ on a really old rusty laptop and on my phone which kinda sucks. oh yeah and also i can‘t watch anything on there 😭 i definitely want to watch wandavision but it‘ll have to wait🤧

Yessss you should def get your GED! I googled and I‘m still not entirely sure what it is dldks but from how you described it- YES!!!!!!

Idk if you know this? Like no idea if I‘ve told you this already (hmmm wait i feel like we talked about it actually?) anyway i was originally gonna go study in England, but for loads of reasons I ended up staying in Germany and I‘m def happy with my decision, but I definitely want to go to England sometime even if it‘s just for six months or maybe for my masters or something? And (obviously everyone is different) but i think everyone should go abroad and live in a different country once in their life, no matter if it‘s for school or what, and even if it‘s just for a few weeks. But i think that‘s something that you‘d never ever forget! And combining that with your acting/theatre??? You really would be living the dream 💘💘😌

how about burgers, chips (fries), and a large drink? any time next week works for me, should i pick you up?— sounds good see you soon 🥰🥰🥰

i used to be one of the people who‘d just do motherlode motherlode motherlode and just... what did i do? Why did i do that??? But not anymore lol. Like I said i haven‘t played sims in a few weeks but i‘ve been watching a few legacy challenge let‘s plays and usually i play with the aging off. So my sims just don‘t age 💀 but i could (should) turn aging on so that it stays exciting and i have limited time and everything. and once i get bored with my current sims i can just make them have kids and continue playing as their children when they get older- like recently i remembered that i haven‘t played the acting career in ages? and i haven‘t had a shop in ages? and i think you can even become a vet right??? like those are definitely some things i want to do in the next weeks!!! Also yes sksksjs i have a few hundred hours on sims as well (if not thousands 😭) it was just that one household that i‘d been playing with for 24hrs

AND GIRL SSKSKJD THE UNIVERSITY THING HAPPENED TO ME TOO, it was a while ago so i don‘t remember what degree and what job it was about but i made my sim study something for aaaaaages so she‘d get a better job from the beginning (you know what i mean like get in at a higher level)...... and i apparently studied the wrong thing cause i didn‘t get any benefits from studying and still had to start at level 1 and shit 🥴🥲

Oh also (this was like 2 weeks ago) Enisa and Michael did take in Michael‘s daughter and i think Enisa currently even has a higher/better relationship with the daughter than Michael but um💀💀💀 also i was hoping (since michael and enisa married (in their back yard i think lol) that the daughter (i forget what her name is😭) would have enisa as her step mom? Like you know how you can see the relationship and it says daughter or son or sister.. and i was hoping that it would say step mom but it doesn‘t say anything 🥲 but in my mind (and if the sims had proper family relations) she is her step mom😌 also Leo is a teenager now???? I mean I aged him up lol dkdk he was being too annoying as a toddler but i don‘t like children so i aged him up twice in one day and now he‘s a teen, but that means he can look after his half sister when she becomes a toddler which is good (the game recognises them as siblings tho even if they‘re just half siblings? why can‘t they have step family members in the sims🥲) okay i‘ve annoyed you enough with sims ✋🏼

I‘ve been a bit sick these past few days and now i‘m getting a headache so i have to finish this response tomorrow 😭😭😭 </3

.

It‘s not tomorrow, it‘s 3 hours later but i‘m better lol

oooff when sims are ungrateful and won‘t woo woo (lol i like that) cause they‘re too tired like?? Be grateful that you‘re not living with your parents anymore 🙄 no okay dkdkdkdl idk if you play with mods (i don‘t) but i know there is a mod (or it‘s part of a mod idk maybe wicked whims?) where you can adjust the percentage of how risky a normal woo woo is, like you still click woo woo (3dksksks okay i‘ll say woohoo again— wait is that what’s it called? 😭) but there‘s like a 25% chance that your sim can still get pregnant just like in real life there‘s always a chance of getting pregnant even if you‘re using protection (just not 25% lmao) but yeah i personally don‘t play with mods sksk and you can always just click try for baby but it would be cool if you could add stuff like risky woohoo to the game without mods (i have no idea how to download mods and i play sims on a really really old laptop and sims is literally tje only thing that works on it anyway so—) i repeat my words from earlier: okay i‘ve annoyed you enough with sims ✋🏼

okay i‘m so sorry i‘m gonna watch fast & furious 1 now cause i need to watch f&f 1-5 until the 30th of april cause they‘re only on netflix til then (i mean i could watch them somewhere else but the quality is never as good) so i will finish this tomorrow after all😭

it is now 1 am, i finished the film, can feel a new obsession coming up again (i always have these f&f obsessions for six months before and after a new film comes out)

THE GOOGLE TRANSLATE wkekdjdj tbh it sounds like someone is speaking with some kind of foreign accent i guess that‘s probably because it just is a direct translation and so anyway slsjsj i don‘t know if you asked me what the word fucking is in german? like idk cause the translation is a bit weird but in case you asked lol sidjsjs theres not really a good translation like we just say fuck for fuck lmao, i don‘t know if you typed in fucking in google translate and it came out as verdammt? cause that means damn (or damned sksjjs) ummm yeah idek if/what you asked so imma move on🤧

I‘m not gonna comment on what you said about every stormzy song cause you already said all the important things but SKSKSJSJSKNSNDBDUDOENWBSLSKKHSULSLSKSBSJSKSK I WAS SMILING SO HARD WHEN I READ YOUR RESPONSE FOR THE FIRST TIME BECAUSE AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH finally i know someone who loves him as much as i do 💘💘💘 also since you brought it up, i‘m pretty sure he‘s considered the most successful UK rapper or if not then at least top 3 so he‘s defffffffffinitely big in the uk, in germany more and more people are listening to uk rap too but not as much stormzy cause theyre dumb apparently 🙄 but anywY i‘m sooooo sooo happy that you like him. i think hith came out end of 2019 (i could be wrong but i think it came out on the 13th of december so (in a european way) you‘d write the date: 13.12 and obviously i don‘t KNOW this but i can definitely imagine that he chose that date because ACAB and yes, Michael. Yes. But he hasn‘t made too much music since then so i hope he‘s working on some new stuff 🤞🏼

Also i ordered the stormzy poster😌 also a nicki minaj one bc i decided i‘m gonna have one wall with red-ish posters (i already have two kinda red ones) and one with blue/green-ish posters (already have two) and i can add stormzy to the blue one and nicki to the red one, but i think that‘s it cause if my walls are tooo full it could look cluttered? I‘m not sure how that type of thing works lmao but my room is generally untidy so i don‘t want the walls to look unorganised too so i think that‘s it for now

I really want to finish this now but my brain is getting kinda slow and i need to sleep soon so this will have to wait till later after all 🥺🥴 (not that it makes and difference to you bc you‘ll see this whenever i post it buttttt i wanted you to know that i want to talk to you again but with my slow brain i‘m just taking too long to do it in one day😭😭😭 and i‘m so busy tomorrow hmm but i‘m sure i‘ll have 30 minutes to finish this then <3)

Okay wait I‘m so dumb I didn‘t realise I‘d nearly answered everything i could have posted this yesterday 😭😭

Oooohh that summer bra sounds so nice like if i was confident enough i literally would just wear a top that resembles a bra (or really is a bra lol) cause my tiddies always be looking amazing i‘m just insecure about my stomach sometimes 🙄🙄🙄 but recently i‘ve been loving myself more and more tbh 😌

also i hope you can go shopping for some nice clothes soon ✨😌

I‘ll be honest I haven‘t listened to your song recs YET but only because i wanna take my time with them and i‘ve been so busy and slso AJ tracey‘s album came out last week and I haven‘t listened to that one yet either so ekdkdj (he‘s also a uk rapper like quite popular and successful as well, but i feel like i‘m not gonna like his album cause whenever i‘m looking forward to an album it ends up being really bad and the albums where you weren‘t expecting it turn out to be bangers.... so yeah but i‘ll let you know when i listen to your songs!!!! :)

Omg i keep having to scroll up all the way to see the next thing you said so sorry if I completely miss some of the things you said😭😭

So when you sent this the bird was still bothering me oh my FUCK DKDLDMMDMDMD but now i‘ve been going to bed at like 1-2am so the bird is probably still asleep lool

Okay and for the rest of your ask my response is: 💘💖❣️💚❣️💛❣️💛💕💞❤️💓💟💞💕💕💖💘💝💟💟🧡❤️🧡💞💛💚💓💚💚💚❣️🧡💖💘🧡💝🧡💕💘🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥺🥺🥺🥰🥺🥺💘💘💘💘💘 (okay that looked cuter in my head i don‘t really like the green hearts dldkkdksndnd)

[thatsgay-writes]

Brooklyn 2 x Reader x Sage 5

Summary: Just some scenes where instead of just Brooklyn pining for Sage, you are too. Each paragraph has like a time skip between them.

Warnings: Light cursing?

(All Exemplar candidates are celebrating their 18th birthday instead of 16th, due to implied smut.)

You practically stumbled into the room behind Brooklyn, who was pulling on your hand. "Nice of you to finally joins us Brooklyn 2 and y/n 3." You look at Brooklyn for a second with a smirk on your face, knowing exactly why you were late. The hickeys that littered your collarbone told the other Exemplar candidates why you were late too and luckily the mentors were too far away to see them. "Sorry we missed the transport bus." Brooklyn said, causing some people to snicker at her response. Mentor Watts raises his eyebrows at everyone's reaction before clearing his throat and moving on.

You sat next to Brooklyn at lunch and kept getting glancing back at the girl from nature section sitting at the table behind you. "Are you even listening to me?" You turn back to Brooklyn fast and blush when you notice the smirk on her face. "Wow and I thought you only had eyes for me." Brooklyn said sarcastically. You rolled your eyes and grab her hand, kissing the back of it and catching Sage's attention, before responding, "Of course you do Brooks, but you know my eyes haven't been the only ones wandering." You smirk as Brooklyn rolls her eyes and blushed. "We have very good taste don't we." Brooklyn looks back at Sage, who was already looking at the two of you and turned away when you both looked back. "Very good taste."

"Y/nnnn, come onnnnn. It's a party! You never turn down a party!" You smile at Brooklyn's whining before leaning in and giving her a kiss. "I'm tired and would like to sleep. Plus you can tell me whatever I miss." "But--" You shook your head, "No buts, plus you need a chance to get closer to Sage. I already did and now it's your turn." Brooklyn rolls your eyes at the fact that your right. "All you gotta do is show her some dance moves and she'll be hooked. That's what happened to me." Brooklyn giggles, remembering the first time you two met and that you were right. You bit your lip in thought before running your hand down her arms and grabbing her hands. "Maybe if it goes good and your not too tired... You could show me some private dance moves when you get back." Brooklyn got a big smile on her face before giving you a quick peck on the lips and rushing out the room. You laughed at her eagerness and laid down on your bed.

"Did you do something?" You ask Brooklyn as you walk up to her, Mags, and Bohdi. Brooklyn turns to look at you confused, "Huh?" "Sage won't talk to me and barely even look at me today. I thought things had gone well last night." Brooklyn looks at Sage confused before turning back to you. "It did! I don't understand what changed. Maybe she's playing hard to get or something?" Mags and Bodhi roll their eye, like the problem isn't obvious. Before they could speak however, Brooklyn walks over to Sage to talk to her. Mags facepalms before looking at you. "Are y'all blind?" You look at his confused before he gestures to your neck. Your eyes widen, immediately realizing what he was gesturing to. "Damn it Brook." You say and glare at her when she gets back. "What?" You smack her on the arm, "I said no marks." Brooklyn pouts at the fact that you were mad at her. "I couldn't resist!" She says and you start walking away. "Y/n!" Brooklyn says and rushes after you, causing Mags and Bodhi to laugh. Neither of them noticing the flash of jealousy that crosses Sage's face.

"This is gonna be flames!" You say as you and Brooklyn walk down the hall. "Yeah but first we gotta get Sage to join us." You nod our head, "True, I'm glad she is kinda talking to us again. It makes flirting easier." Brooklyn laughs at your statement before throwing an arm over your shoulder and smiles at you. You both catch Sage right before she enters her room. "So, a bunch of us are joining Aliyah's protest. You with us? Sage?" Brooklyn asks as she leans against the wall and you stand next to her. Sage lets out a sigh, "I want to help. I really, really do. I just... I don't know if I feel comfortable doing this?" Brooklyn sighs, expecting some resistance to join. "You think any of us are comfortable doing this? What about Bodhi, he's been sweating it out in an interrogation room all day." "They let Aliyah go. Okay? Maybe we just have to be patient." You shook your head slightly, "No hate on Aliyah but she is a Templar's daughter. He dad probably just go her out." Brooklyn nods in agreement, while Sage sighs in frustration. "It's just that, just being here means everything to me. It's all I ever dreamed of--" "Your not alone." Brooklyn interrupts. "Then how can you risk throwing it all away?" Sage asks, almost in disbelief. "Like Aliyah said, it's less of a risk if the more of us join in." Brooklyn stated. Sage seemed to be getting frustrated now. "You're asking me to trust other people and I--" You grab Sage's arm in an attempt to calm her down before speaking. "We're not asking you to trust them, we're asking you to trust us." You say, your eyes practically pleading for her to change her mind. Brooklyn smirks a little before walking next to you and grabs Sage's other arm before sliding it down to hold her hand, you mirror Brooklyn's actions. Sage looks like a tomato and before she can speak, Brooklyn speaks up. "We're not gonna let anything happen to your dreams... Especially since we're in them every night." After Brooklyn's statement, you and Sage roll your eyes and giggle causing Brooklyn to be confused. "What?" You and Sage make eye contact before you both just shake your heads. "Nothing Brooks, nothing."

You stand outside Sage's door after letting Brooklyn walk in by herself. Listening in, it sounds like everything is going to plan. "A romantic dinner for two?" You hear Sage ask. "Something like that but it's up to you. Look, you took a big risk trusting me and y/n today and joining the protest. I know that that wasn't easy for you but I want you to know it meant a lot to everyone. It meant a lot to both of us." You can imagine Sage blushing and almost laugh when you hear her stutter back a response. "You mean a lot to me too. I mean... It meant a lot to you both and--" "Sage. I know that's why I'm here." "Oh." You giggle under your breath before noticing it went silent. You furrow our eyebrows in confusion and wait a minute before deciding if you should knock on the door or not. "Okay, I was gonna wait til after we ate for the kiss but..." Your eyebrows rose in shock, That bitch, we agreed that I get the first kiss. You knock on the door with a little force. "Come in." You walk in and notice the blush covering Sage and Brooklyn's face. You send a little glare towards Brooklyn, who just realized that she messed up. "Two things," You say as you put your food down on the side table and stand in front of Brooklyn and Sage with your arms crossed. Sage, who obviously read the situation wrong began to speak. "Wait are y'all to dating because I didn't know, I just thought--" You put a finger over Sage's lips to stop her from speaking. "First things first." You turn to Brooklyn with a small glare, "We both agreed I would get the first kiss with Sage, because of this you will not be allowed in my room for the next three days." "What-- But--" You put a finger over Brooklyn's lips and lean down to make direct eye contact with her. You shake your head, "Nope we had a deal and I couldn't punish you with something you enjoy." Brooklyn rolls her eyes while Sage blushes, getting the meaning of your words. "Now for the second of order business." You say before turning to Sage, "I was gonna wait til after we ate too but, oh well." You say and pull Sage into a kiss. "Damn."

[queercapwriting]

If you had a moment, could we see Maggie/Alex reaching out to find their own support when the other is going through a rough patch, please? My girlfriend's struggling with depression a lot and I'm getting there with the whole support-her-but-still-look-after-myself thing, but it's a struggle because I'm really not good at asking for help. Thanks in advance, Mum! :)

Maggie’s used to taking care of people.

She’s used to it because it’s really all she ever does.

She overempathizes – she always has – but not deep, not hard, not desperate.

Because what she told Alex is true: there aren’t a lot of people that she cares about. Like, really cares about.

Abstractly, she cares about everybody. It’s why she is who she is.

But personally, passionately?

She cares about Alex.

A lot.

So when Alex sinks into a deep depression after Jeremiah, after almost losing Kara again, again, again, and when Alex tries – hard – not to drink, and fails once, and fails again, and Maggie picks up the pieces, she’s happy to do it.

Happy to do it, because god, she loves her, she loves her, she loves her.

Which is precisely why it’s so hard to watch Alex gasp for breath, tears streaking down her face, apologizing, apologizing, apologizing, her words slurring and the kisses she tries to give her sloppy – kisses that Maggie doesn’t accept because “not like this, baby, not when you’re drunk” – tasting like whiskey.

Which is precisely why it’s so hard to watch Alex sit on the couch, remote in hand, bottle of club soda open next to her, eyes vacant, not moving, not doing anything but staring at god knows what on the television, for hours, hours, hours on end.

She and Kara develop shifts.

To be with her. To take care of her.

Because alone time is important.

But right now, for Alex, alone time is a bit dangerous.

It was going to be Maggie’s night – they were going to watch movies and cuddle.

But she watched a child nearly die in the field today, and she can’t, she can’t, she can’t, be even partially responsible for someone else’s mood, for taking care of someone right now.

She calls her, though, because she needs to make sure.

Needs to make sure Alex feels loved. Feels cared for. Feels adored.

Because she is, she is, she is.

“Hey babe, how you doing?”

“Bored. I want an invasion or an explosion or something.”

Maggie grins and shakes her head faintly. “You’re in a league of your own, Danvers. Listen, I was thinking about tonight – would it be okay if I duck out of movies and Kara comes over instead? I had a rough case today, and I kind of just wanted to blow of some steam and lose my cool a little bit – “

“No, no, of course. Kara’s here right now, I – hey, wanna do a movie tonight?”

Maggie pulls the phone away from her ear at the sound of Kara’s excited squeal. There’s shuffling and static and then Kara’s voice takes over from Alex’s.

“Hey Maggie! I have just the musical in mind for me and Alex to watch! But um…”

Maggie hears footsteps, and Kara is clearly walking rapidly away from her sister.

“Are you okay?”

Maggie sighs. “Yeah, Little Danvers, I just… I need to take care of myself a bit, I need – “

“Yeah. Yeah, of course Maggie, whatever you need. Should I send Winn and James over to your place with boxing gloves and beer?”

She’s ready to say no.

No because she already feels horrible – like she’s abandoning Alex, pawning her off onto Kara, like she’s being a terrible girlfriend, like she’s being unsupportive and insensitive and a general, all around selfish asshole – by canceling their date, but she can barely breathe because her own depression is so strong, she can barely fight the gravity pulling at her chest because the weight of her own hurt is so heavy.

But Kara would die to protect Alex.

Hell, Kara has none of Alex’s ruthlessness, but she would kill to protect Alex.

And Kara isn’t angry. Kara isn’t calling Maggie selfish and accusing her of abandoning her sister.

Instead, Kara is offering to send in the cavalry to make sure that Maggie, too, is getting what she needs.

And the idea of Winn with boxing gloves really is hilarious.

“Yeah. Yeah, okay, ask them. Please.”

“Great! Okay, let me give you back to Alex – “

“Little Danvers – thank you.”

“Thank you, Maggie. I’m proud of you. Here’s your girl.”

“Hey.”

“Hey beautiful. I’m sorry – I think Kara’s gonna make you watch another musical.”

“Pfft. That’s what she thinks.”

“Al.”

“Maggie?”

“You know I love you, right, babe? And you know I’m so proud of you for how strong you’re being, with everything that’s going on?”

There’s a long silence, and she thinks she hears Alex sniffle.

“I love you too, Mags. Have a good time unwinding with the boys tonight, okay? Maybe we can get breakfast in the morning?”

“I’d love that.”

And, in the morning, she does.

But she also winds up loving her night.

Because James and Winn don’t ask questions when they come over.

Winn has pizza and beer, and James has a gym bag, and he admires the heavy bag Maggie has set up in the corner of her studio while Winn bustles through her kitchen grabbing plates and tugging through drawers for her bottle openers.

They don’t talk about anything real until James and Maggie have finally taught Winn to throw a proper punch, Maggie showing him how to align his fist, James helping him rotate his hips properly.

Winn begs for a break – “I finally did it right! Gotta go off on a high, right?” and collapses onto her couch with a slice and a bottle in his hands. He watches Maggie wrap her wrists, James steady the bag, and Maggie dig into it with perfect form, with perfectly dispassionate passion.

Of course Alex is in love with her.

Winn cheers her on around mouthfuls of pizza and gulps of beer and she grins and punches harder.

But her punches become less about form and more about rage after a while, and James and Winn exchange glances. Winn changes tactics.

“So how’s she doing? Your woman?” he in between Maggie’s blows and James’s soft encouragement.

Maggie freezes and James gently reminds her to relax her shoulders, and her nearly clips the side of his face with the force of her next punch.

“Not great.”

Jab, jab. Uppercut.

“I mean, of course she’s great. She’s amazing. I just… It’s never hurt me this much.”

Jab. Uppercut. Jab jab. Kick. Hook. Hook. Kick.

“What’s never hurt you this much?” James asks, eyes on Maggie’s, hands bracing the bag.

She slams into it until she can’t anymore.

“I love her. I love her. I love her like I’ve never loved anyone, and watching her hurt? It… it makes me want to… to murder people, you know, but… but sometimes there aren’t any people to murder, sometimes it’s just… brain chemistry or something, you know, and I can’t do anything about it, at all, so it’s helpless, I’m helpless, and I just… I love her. You know? I just love her so much.”

She rests her forehead on the bag for a moment, panting, sweating, staring at nothing in particular. At anything but James or Winn’s face.

The boys glance at each other, James with a soft smile on his face, because god, Alex has long deserved someone who loves her like this.

Winn swallows a gulp of pizza – he’d stopped chewing while Maggie was talking – and stares at her for a long moment.

“You know what makes everything better, Maggie?”

She grunts and halfway turns her face in his direction.

“Pizza.”

“You know I can still toss you in lockup for fun,” she deadpans, but she tugs off her wraps and grabs a slice, collapsing on the couch next to him anyway. James follows suit and settles on the floor in front of them.

“You know Lois almost died. A lot. When Lucy and I were together. Hazard of being Superman’s girlfriend, I guess. And Lucy would really get… well, down. She’d collapse in on herself, kind of like Alex tends to do.”

“It’s not a coincidence they’re both soldiers,” Winn chugs his beer, and Maggie toasts him silently, thoughtfully, with her own bottle.

“And it was hard. Watching her going through it, and feeling like I couldn’t do anything about it. But what you’re doing right now, Maggie? Taking a night to take care of yourself, to make sure you have the boundaries you need? Letting yourself acknowledge when you have your own tough day, and do what you need to do for yourself? That’s just as important as taking care of Alex directly, Maggie.”

“The man speaks the truth, Sawyer,” Winn chimes softly, and Maggie exhales slowly, softly.

“I’m not abandoning her?”

She keeps her voice steady and she keeps her voice invulnerable, but the question itself almost tears her throat on the way out anyway.

“No.”

“Absolutely not.”

“Anyway, Alex told me she’s going to make her watch Not Another Teen Movie.”

“Alex hates that movie,” Maggie’s brow furrows.

James grins. “Kara hates it more.”

“That’s… unexpected.”

“The Danvers girls are unpredictable,” Winn declares, and Maggie grins.

“And lovable. Super, super lovable.”

The boys both sigh with soft, resigned grins, and all three of them drink – deeply – at the same moment.

“Yep. Yep, they are.”