#alas...that dream of mine has ended

[slappyclappy]

really really good trio

[apomaro-mellow]

Hospitals still weren't Eddie most favorite place to be, even though they had technically saved his life once. He didn't give doctors the credit though. No, he reserved that praise for his husband who had literally carried him through hell, holding his guts together.

But alas, he was still only human. And thus prone to human ailments. Which was why he was currently in a hospital bed, preparing for a tonsillectomy.

"Steve, my love, my muse", Eddie took his hand and kissed it. "Should I not return from this-"

"Oh shut up. It's a routine operation." Steve could tell he was being dramatic to cover up the fact that he was actually scared. "You'll be fine. In fact, I'm going down to the cafeteria right now. You're not getting just any ice cream. I'm gonna bring you back a whole sundae."

Steve looked to the rest of the band, who had come for moral support. "Watch him please. And don't let him fall to hysterics." He left out, really hoping he wouldn't come back to an Eddie in tears.

"Sooo", Grant started. "If you don't make it, who gets your house?"

Eddie's brow furrowed. "Uh, my husband, duh?"

"Okay, who gets your husband?", Gareth asked.

Eddie saw the cavalry arrive in the form of Steve's true soulmate. "Robiiiiin", he whined. "You have to protect Steve from these vultures", he hissed the last word.

"We're just trying to hash out who has dibs on Eddie's hot husband", Jeff said.

Robin pointed to herself. "I made it clear to Eddie when he proposed that should the marriage end, either naturally or by divorce, custody of Steve would revert back to me."

"Not exactly the answer I was looking for Bucks, but as long as you keep Steve out of another man's clutches, I won't haunt you from the grave."

"Actually, I plan on setting him up with the first wealthy guy he meets", Robin said. "Thanks to your fame, I've become accustomed to a certain lifestyle. And also, Steve doesn't know how to be single."

The other CC boys nodded sagely.

"All the more reason one of us should get him. We can take care of him", Grant said.

"I can't believe this. This is a goddamn coup!", Eddie shouted.

Steve returned, none the wiser to their conversation. "You won't believe this. The cafeteria has chocolate syrup AND nuts? Isn't that wild? You're gonna have the best sundae of your life, babe."

He took his seat right next to Eddie's bedside and kissed his forehead.

"Angel, we're surrounded by snakes and thieves", Eddie said deliriously.

"What are you talking about?", Steve asked.

Having only Eddie in his line of sight, he couldn't see the others behind him. So he didn't see Jeff making kissy faces, Gareth making a circle with his hand and sticking a finger through it repeatedly, or Grant making a V with his fingers and flapping his tongue between them.

"Those traitorous lechers covet what is mine. And not even Robin seeks to protect your virtue!", Eddie said, desperately reaching out for Steve.

Steve kept his voice even and calm, trying to soothe his husband from whatever delusion he was having when the doctor came in. This guy looked like he played a doctor on tv. Chiseled jaw with perfectly manicured facial hair.

"Good evening", he greeted.

"Hi", Steve said, voice a little breathy.

"Oh he's perfect", Robin said, reading her friend perfectly.

"I'm Dr. Morip, I'll be performing your operation today."

"Morip?", Eddie tilted his head.

"Yes, as in 'more ripped than you'." Then he flexed and busted out of his scrubs and swept Steve off his feet, ignoring the cries of the invalid on the bed.

Eddie was tossing and turning even as Steve shook his shoulders to wake him up.

"You were having a nightmare", Steve spoke softly in the dim lamp light of the hospital room. "Was it 86 again?"

"Steve!", Eddie clung to him as best as he could. "You didn't leave me for Dr. Morip!"

"Dr. Morip? Eddie, her name is Dr. Hudson. And she's married and in her sixties."

Everything caught up with Eddie as his brain became more lucid. He'd already had the operation. That had all been a dream. The tension released instantly as he realized he wasn't about to die on the table and Steve would be scooped up by opportunistic friends.

"You're mine, you know that?"

"Really? Is that why I'm hand-feeding you ice cream?", Steve teased, holding up a spoonful to Eddie's lips.

"I love you", Eddie said, voice muffled from the food and a little watery too.

"I know, you dope. Love you too."

[thisisa-stateofgrace]

random au prompts / inspos for kingdon and the entire pitt crew

— this will be a growing list

bridgerton!au - mel is presented to society but also wants to be a doctor. her dad is robby who was recently widowed. she is looking for a man who can accept her dreams etc. frank is probably an apprentice or something but not part of the landed gentry. i can lowkey also see javadi-mateo as something like theloise

princess diaries!au / inspired - mel and her “me l? a princess? shut up” and she meets frank who is prob 99th in line to the thrown… (yes the chris pine one)

Youve got mail!au - set in the turn of the millenium where frank and mel meet in a chatroom about… gravel propbably or road safety. One has a doctor radio show while the other is a doctor on a tv show and their always pitted against each other??? Or maybe they’re vying for the same fellowship i don’t know right now im groggy

Wedding Season!AU - cliché but i want a javadi an going to indian weddings and she implores the help of a random stranger mateo to be her date / boyfriend not sure how but yeah

Set It Up! AU - frank and mel as personal assistants to crazy bosses and they fall in love or something

When Harry Met Sally!AU - i mean “When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.” DEFINITELY - like a time where they did rotations. Remained friends. Mel probably got another fellowship etc somewhere else and they meet again and becca is more or less independent and thriving in the facility and mel is now available for things and shiz and a gesture of love

27 dresses / wedding planner!AU - mel is a wedding planner. Frank… going to marry Abby but Mel was from his past or something.

speak now by taylor swift - frank and mel are med school buddies, abby is the art girl (inspired by the youre a good man frank langdon) — mel taking courage to speak now and not hold her peace!!!

miss americana and the heartbreak prince by taylor swift - mel as the miss americana im so hooked by the line “voted most likely to run away with you” probably something where frank is a bad boy bec why not

governess!au - mel is the new governess to single dad, frank langdon. that’s it that’s the fic.

mastermind by taylor swift - garcia x santos - self-explanatory “i’m a mastermind and now, you’re mine.”

holy ground by taylor swift - collins x robby (good breakup feels)

bff au #2 - you belong with me > yes i want kingdon to freaking talk using paper and markers and their neigbors

a walk to remember!au - frank langdon, school popular kid and bad boy, meets mel king, the quiet girl into something and that is it hahaha just make it happen pls im sorry hahaha “she had her miracle. it was you.”

the hating game!au - enemies to lovers from diff backgrounds vying for the promotion

music man / swingtime! au - more of the context that frank langdon is a con man faced with a good-hearted lady and yes he tries to abandon his old ways

parks & rec au - (coincidentally there is a song by mouserat called the pitt) - sunflower painting scene. mel tries her hand in online dating and matches with some people… surprisingly matches with a co-worker (i don’t know maybe jesse but jesse is good or maybe ahmad??? We can think about this later) but apparently she just matched with pne of his accounts (ala tom). she ends up deciding to just be open to dating especially those who will come her way, bec she wants them in person and that’s frabk who is her coworker and they both like the sunflower painting and they eat in front of it okbye

pushing daisies au. - yes for some reason: frank langdon has a tendency to resurrect people with one touch. but if he touches them again… they drop dead… forever. mel as his d**eased ex whom he hasnt seen in a while but is still the love of his life and he touches her but they cant touch again or else she’s gonna be real dead

Castle au (somewhat) - mel, a nypd detective has to solve a murder patterned from the works crime novelist, frank langdon. the man’s egotistical (but with right) and she may or may not be a fan.

[pudding-parade]

I was contemplating re-installing Reshade, but frankly I've never been able to get it to do what I want because I just don't understand what shaders do or how to manipulate them, and people who share presets tend to have vastly different preference than I have. It occurred to me, though, that maybe I could fiddle with lighting mods instead to get the job done. So, taking some inspiration from @rollo-rolls and her recent mashing-together of lighting mods, I decided to do some mashing of my own to see what I could come up with.

The above is what I've come up with, so far. No Reshade, no Photoshop (not even a contrast adjustment), just my "naked" game, which does involve NVIDIA profile settings for antialiasing and such as well as graphics rules for higher-def textures and shadows.

It's a mish-mash of:

1) My favorite lighting mod, Burntwaffles's Dream Dimension, which I (mostly) love in general, but it can be a little "shallow" and washed-out sometimes, and it does sometimes create harsh and overly-dark shadows, especially on covered porches and on sims in outdoor lighting.

2) Some adjusted values from @boringbones's lighting mod, which I generally like because it adds a very nice depth, but overall it's a little too contrast-y and the shadows are a bit too dark and hard-edged for my personal likings, while other things are too bright/saturated for my likings.

3) A half-assed lighting mod that I made for personal use years ago, which borrowed Dream Dimension's color ramps, but I desaturated them a little bit here and there. Those are the ramps in this mod.

Additionally, the clouds, sun halo, and stars in my game are provided by @wasset-aseskara's separate "Enchanted Environment" mod, the images of which I've also edited to my likings quite a bit over the years. I didn't do anything to CAS lighting because 1) I don't care enough, and 2) I'm very happy with @simbouquet's CAS lighting.

Anyway, I'm liking it so far. It's (mostly) gotten rid of the harsh shadows on sims, especially on their faces outdoors, and reduced (but alas not eliminated) the weird darkness in some places (like ceilings) with over-brightness in others (like some walls) that naturally-daylit interiors tend to have, even with edited/fixed window lighting. But, I've yet to look at it during anything but a sunny day, so we'll see what it looks like on cloudier days and at night. That's today's project.

I didn't take any "before" pictures because I really hadn't planned on spending hours messing around with this, but here is a couple of houses back when I put them in this world, with an untweaked Dream Dimension lighting mod in place, and then with my frankensteined thing:

(With the caveat that "before" was with my old video card, GTX1050Ti vs. the RTX4060 I have now. Otherwise, the only difference is the lighting mod and the addition of @asabinsims's "Project Renaissance" tree/plant defaults, which I highly recommend if you like a more-realistic look...though I admit that I have plans to desaturate some of the images in them because weird me likes more desaturated colors.)

Anyway, maybe I'll share it if the other weather environments and nighttime end up looking OK, in case there's anyone else out there who has similar weird preferences to mine.

[shanieveh]

cause you weren't mine to lose....

— situationships with the genshin men

KAZUHA who stared at fallen maple leaves that matched the color of your lips. Pathetic. How can he think of you every single day of his life but scared to tell his feeling—his desire to be only yours. He would give his life to you if you ask... his very being. What a shame that such love affairs like these were created to never last. But alas, he was never yours to begin with.

ALHAITHAM was never one to commit to an undefined relationship. But for you he would do everything. And as he cancelled all his work meetings if you call to meet up. His rationality faded the more he was with you. He started to hope... for all of it. The no nonsense man actually started to dream for a fictional world, where it ends with both of you still together.

XIAO was scared of love but when he saw you he became a moth attracted to the flame of hearts and desire. The once selfless yaksha became greedy, his heart yearning to be picked up by your delicate hands. Many promises were made but no clear definition of what you both were... he didn't really care. Everything has always come to an end in his life, and for the very first time he learned to cherish it all.

KAVEH never really questioned your special friendship, one of flirting, some jealousy but what he didn't expect was to fall in love this deep. He was so scared of losing another loved one. But still taking the chance, the architect decided to give you his heart, every bit of it. He cared for you, he adored you... he loved you. And even as you slip away in his hand there will never be another you. You were never his, but he will always be yours.

SCARAMOUCHE who was so scared to be abandoned was willing to take the risk. He put aside everything for you, even if he looked like he didn't care. Even if he never had the chance to say it, he was only willing to put up this world if you were in it. There was no "i love you" or "let's be together". Wanting was enough, for him it was enough. Just being with you, just holding your hands and picking flowers. He was content.

AYATO knows full well that he shouldn't feel this way. As time slipped away so did his dignity. At this point, it was thrown in the trash. He publicly always showed you affection, rejoicing in giving you favoritism above everyone and everything. Meetings were cancelled, deadlines were not met. Putting you first, behind them all. But deep in your heart you always knew, that this summer love will slip away, and both of you can't do anything about it.

KAEYA is a man filled with half truths and broken promises. You were always so unsure on how he felt about you. But what you didn't know is the anguish he felt when you both weren't together. They way he would throw it all for for you. Mondstadt or Khaenri'ah? It was you all of him was all for you. For a person he didn't know felt the same way. For the very being he dedicated his life to, willing to stay to an empty promise that one day you will love him back.

[brainworms-all-night-long]

Ah anyway, I mentioned wanting to rewrite that mine scene from arcane s2 yea, alas autism took over and maybe one day some day I will rewrite it with the Actual Sisters in mind instead of the hedge-fox siblings

Either way please enjoy 2,827 words of tension between siblings and maybe open doors to some sort reconciliation possibility at the end..?

———

"At least they didn't live to see the psycho their child turned into."

"Which one!?" Nine immediately blurted back, a pool of new-sprung resentment brew at the bottom of their stomach, "I didn't come down here, wearing a spiffy enforcer uniform with new pals, gassing people and shoving topside guns in their faces!"

Sonic seemed genuinely taken aback for a second while Nine went to catch his breath after forgetting to do so while talking.

Of course Sonic didn't think about the actual fallout, implications and consequences of his actions until they were thrown into his face after the fact. Typical.

The hedgehog then, took a heavy step forward. His almost toxic green eyes stared daggers at the other as gears in his head began to turn in an attempt to come up with a reasonable retort.

"Topside guns or not, I tried to fix the mess you made. You have blood on your hands." Taking yet another step, he pointed an accusatory finger at the ynamused fox, since the retort was indeed, falling flat, "You blew up whoever Ivo pointed you to without a single thought. You killed and terrorized people, innocent people. Symbol of the Underground's hope my ass, you started a fucking war."

Nine let the prickles of dread fall of their shoulders at the hatefull look from their brother's face and stood their ground. Even though they really wanted to bite Sonic's nose off.

A fucking hypocrite this guy was.

The gal of him saying that, as if he, after seven years of prison, didn't dawn on a badge that says 'I kill whoever the council tells me to for fun and because I can!'

Not to mention this "war" was long time coming anyway.

Nine didn't go to poor people's houses purposefully releasing poison gas on them and then arresting them en masse. That, alongside all the other shit the council has allowed and ordered to happen, thank you very much.

They simply shot those that got in their way, or fired first. Most "innocent" people had the sense to move out of the way before bullets started flying. Or they wouldn't even be in Nine's line of sight anyway. And if Sonic's talking about Topside, then honestly, that's a whole another can of worms.

"No one Topside is innocent." Nine hissed, "They're the reason we don't have a mom and dad you know." They said I a grim tone, and the hedgehog shut his mouth throughly af that. "Or Chuck, in his regular non-murderous, hedgehog form. Or Eggman... Although ok, the last one might be a slight stretch, it-it still counts."

Unfortunally, Sonic rolled his eyes at the drop of seriousness in the fox's tone and was back on his high-horse.

"Eggman got whatever he deserved." He scoffed with air quotes around the nickname. "He poisoned you and the Undercity enough. He's the reason Chuck is dead and that I was thrown in jail for– I don't even know how many years, and that you turned into–" He paused, wildly gesturing to Nine's entire frame. "This."

Nine pinned their ears back at such a careless dismissal.

Not only of Eggman, but them, and the entirety of the Undercity. Sonic had turned his back on all of them. If not when he was a kid, then the day he put on that fucking uniform.

And while Nine could hardly dream of ever achieving Eggman's efficiency at political planning by pulling the strings, they sure as hell won't have all those years of effort go to waste.

Sure the human was by no means perfect, because like, he got people killed and addicted to Dead God Drugs, but it finally got the Topside assholes to listen, and to be scared of consequences for what they've been unchecked doing down here.

And they're all yet to pay for what they've done to their brother.

Just how bad has that enforcer bastard brainwashed him...

Other than that, Nine wished there was at least a sliver of acknowledgement of just how much that old man meant to them as just some guy that picked them up when eveyone else was gone.

And now he was gone too. And again it was by no one else's fault but their own...

"Ivo didn't make me do anything." Nine resolutely shook their head, derailing their train of thought into background noise and clicked their mechanical tails together in annoyance, "And guess what, he actually fucking appreciated me for what I was. Unlike some people." They shot their brother a glare, pinning the 'someone' onto his stupid big blue forehead. Or green. By Chaos that green dye was stupid. Why did he go with green, he could've gone with black to be a proper sad loser at least. But than again, he would've just needed up looking like that Topside schmuck so this was for the better.

The hedgehog, currently subjected to Nine's internal ridicule, only balked, actually jabbing the finger into the X formed by the string holding their old, tattered shirt together.

"He turned you into his perfect little killing machine! Manipulated you so well that even after his death you can't see it! Everyone with an ounce of brain left hates you because you let him play you like a fiddle and then serve as his little puppet chaos!"

Ok, Nine knew Sonic didn't see past that really, really biteable nose sticking from his muzzle, but they wished he chose to pick on literally anything else but the poor old man.

"He was doing the exact same you used to, allow me to remind you." Nine pointed a finger of their own, actually stabbing it into the hedgehog's chest as they twisted their face in vitriol. Actually feeling the resentment leak into their insides further.

"Except, you know, he didn't chicken out when I finally made my bombs explode properly."

Sonic didn't move, but his expression temporarily lost its edge. A grim memory resurfacing.

Nine took a stern step back, rising to their full height (which was just slightly above Sonic's anyway), and put their hands on their hips in an attempt to keep it together.

"That is to say; keep Eggman's name out of your mouth and keep walking."

Sonic scoffed, letting his hand drop. He took a sharp breath before stepping to the side, trudging deeper into the mine.

Of course, Nine's original intent was to fully drop the conversation there, but the bag was already cut open, might as well get that cat out of it.

"There's someone else I'd say played you like a fiddle." They turned on his heel dramatically, trailing after their brother, who opted to pretend they weren't there apparently. He didn't spare even an ear flick in their direction.

Instead the mine was was filled with nothing but the tap of those oversized prism-kicks periodically triggered the bioluminescent fungus when hitting a stray bolt or pebble.

"Where is he now? That fancy-pants topside, no-fun-at-all." The silent treatment didn't deter Nine in the slightest, "Don't tell me he dumped you so soon. You were suuuch a perfect couple while plotting assasinations and ambushes together." And they made sure to coat their words with as much venom, sarcasm and resentment as possible.

Sonic though, didn't respond. The only sigh he even heard them was a progressively deepening scowl on his face.

"Was he the one to send you into that pit or you actually got some sense into that vacant skull of yours and left on your own?"

"Can it Jinx. Before I do something I regret again."

The hedgehog suddenly snapped, twisting sharply in their direction and into a half fighting stance with a fist balled at his side.

"Aww, gonna punch me in the face again big bro?" The fox teased in that same venomous, sing-song voice. The phantom ache on their cheek haunting them for years panged again, but at this point it was second nature to ignore it. "You kind of fell off though, used to be better at it."

Than that fist was raised above their face, adrenaline from a seemingly endless fight bleeding from their veins, sternum uncomfortably crushed beneath hot metal plates and—

All Sonic did was shot him a silent warning glare. The plates on his kicks reconfigured, hissing out steam.

Nine blinked the flash memory away, pulling their lips in a frown.

"Sheesh, you really are in a mood today. Almost like you're not happy to see me or something."

At that he sighed through his teeth, hanging his head low and turned towards the seemingly endless mine tunnel.

"Hm, go figure."

Afterwards? Silent treatment. Again.

The darkness became thicker, almost physical as they went on. Particles of near static dust parted before them after every loud metal step. The quite literal monster lurking somewhere in there was stashed into the backlog of noise.

Neither of them might've been saying anything, but of course, Nine's head was anything but empty. A stray screeching in his ears, clink of metal against rock and a few pebbles falling to the ground, maybe even a person screaming or just the wind howling. Hard to tell which one of those had an actual physical origin, if any.

In the dim organic light, they observed the stoic silhouette of their brother. Shoulders squared and a steady step. No fear in what he might bump into between the flickers of darkness. At least he appeared so. Those spines of his were hard to read when so messed up and badly groomed, they looked to be on end almost constantly and he didnt seem like the most relaxed guy just a while ago.

Just when did they get so bad at reading their own brother...

Perhaps after they stopped being scared of the dark. Now they knew what danger would await them in there exactly, and everything else was either not real, or could be taken out with a well aimed blast of pure prism energy.

But they remember the days of being scared of what might lurk in places where they could not see or hear properly. They were scared of a lot of things back then actually.

And there just so happened to be a certain someone that would comfort them if the terror ever became unbearable. Someone that held their hand whenever the monsters would creep in and threaten to snatch them away. Someone that promised to always love and protect them, someone who made them feel safe in the dark like no one else.

Sonic has never felt as far away as he did now.

He was right there though.

Arms reach away.

They could call out to him, grab him by the shoulder, kick his knee in, tackle him to the ground and shoot him in the face— yet for some reason it felt Nine couldn't move any further to the hedgehog then they already were.

An old shovel abandoned, the metal of Sonic clown shoes cracked against it and in after a static flicker of light, Nine could swear the hedgehog had that awful dye washed out of his quills and stood much shorter. A reassuring smile on his lips.

A blink and it was gone.

Nine stepped on one side of the eroded mine cart rail, balancing on it with little to no effort as they continued onward.

"You know... I do miss the time when we were kids." Somehow they fished out their voice, stuck somewhere in the back of their throat, "Unaware of the complexity of just how thoroughly fucked everything was. Just you and me, my mistakes and your fixes. Never giving up on me even when everyone else kept telling you to do so..."

We're they actually talking, or just though really hard about doing it? Well it certainly felt like sound was leaving their mouth, so the most likely option was Sonic just deliberately ignored them.

Nine was mostly just rattling off thoughts out loud anyway, whether anyone heard them or not was unimportant. A sudden bout of reminiscence taking over them., was all. They missed this blue, now emo, idiot a lot actually.

"Until of course, you did give up which... yea ok, fair. But, still think about it from time to time."

No response.

He used to be their entire world.

Now he wouldn't even look at them.

Could they even blame him though?

Nine shut their eyes forcibly. Already feeling a familiar chill crawling up their spine.

That reassuring smile was nothing but a hallucination, they knew. An echo of a long gone past or something entirely made up.

Nine stepped off the rail as it got way too wrinkly and rusted to walk on properly.

That, and their legs were getting wobbly when thinking about the possibility of the memory from which that face came not being real.

It wouldn't be the first time it was wrong, there wasn't a whole lot they could fully trust back there.

So maybe...

Maybe all those times they remembered of Sonic taking the blame and the brunt of their "jinxes" weren't real. It's possible, that Sonic never actually cared all that much, or at all.

Maybe the two of them just happened to spend a lot of time together due to one circumstance or another, and in a poor attempt to cope, Nine's mind twisted the words and misinterpreted actions of the past into something that could get them through the day.

Maybe all of those compliments they remembered were meant to be backhanded and Nine, as a desperate and naive child, just didn't catch it.

Because by all the recent evidence, it would make sense.

A grim conclusion, but... Sonic did abandon them, 'I swear, I'm never going to abandon you again..' punched them, 'BECAUSE YOU'RE A JINX!' came back from the dead '...nothing, is ever going to change that.' only to lead a fucking enforcer on their trail and merrily try to kill them alongside that bastard. 'They're not getting away again!'

Trying to look past all that in an attempt at reconciliation was just another big mistake of theirs, wasn't it?

'The two-tails always jinxes everything.'

They really can't fix a single thing, permanently or right.

'Soon enough he'll realize just how much of a liability you are—'

No one will ever want them around.

'Don't cry. You're perfect.'

The only person that ever did is dead.

'...Ray was right—'

'Don't listen to him!'

'who would've expected— Every time she's around— it's almost like you're the— They blew it, again!— never anything right— Just one thing— nothing good—'

And it all began melting into incoherent noise and ringing.

In a futile attempt, they tried to muffle it by clasping their ears as close to their skull as possible. Of course, they knew it wouldn't work, it wasn't possible to shut out the sound of one's own brain, there was no way to just turn it off and they tried unholstering their gun to get rid of the closest thing to the cause of this chaos except did they really want to kill their brother here and now of all places and times after they tried to fix what they broke was this guy even the same person—

It was like they breathed in for the first time after years then, as an audible hiss of steam shot through the suffocating wall of blurry noise and shattered it into temporary silence.

A steady hand was placed on the back of their shoulder, grounding them somewhat back into reality, rubbing gentle circles on their back while the gun fell from their hand and it clattered almost immediately. Soon it became clear they were much closer to the ground itself than they initially remembered.

There was a voice, but Nine couldn't process the words at all.

They looked up, meeting green eyes staring down at him. Concern and mild panic were all they saw before the tunnel went completely dark. The only light left being Nine's tails and the prism shards in Sonic's walkers ways deeper in the tunnel.

The hand which shook the gun moved to their cheek, cupping it just as gently as the one on their back.

Nine was almost sent barreling straight into another episode for the exact opposite reason if Sonic stayed quiet for one more second.

"...can you hear me, like at all?"

Nine swallowed thickly, after what felt like years of silently gawking at nothing, they regained motor control of their own body enough to nod and speak.

"Loud and c-clear. Clear. Loud and clear" Though it felt like they were trying out their voice for the first time in years.

Without any further questions, Sonic pulled their hand over his neck and helped both of them upright.

They stood in silence, neither knowing whether to let go or what to comment on, or if to do anything at all.

Eventually, Sonic decided to be the icebreaker, and do it with the smallest voice ever heard from the hedgehog.

"Do you... do you deal with that often?"

Nine immediately cracked into a grin.

"The voices and hallucinations? Yea. Have been for a while now. No, ever since I can rember actually."

They pried their hands back from the hedgehog, quickly picking up, dusting and holstering their pistol, but made no further attempt at increasing their distance.

"But they've been a lot more chill lately. Eggy's pretty nice, and the rest just pop in from time to time to make sure I don't forget about them or something."

"The rest...?" Sonic asked carefully, taking a natural step back with a glance over his shoulder. The lack of a heavy metal footfall was distinctly notable.

Nine's eyes trailed down, seeing the haphazardly tossed away boots by the tracks a few meters away from the two of them.

Huh, Sonic stepped out of his fancy slippers to comfort them, how nice.

Sonic audibly grimaced, traces of guilt palpable within, before he let out an indescribable noise. And fully turned to retrieve the boots.

"Yea. Mighty, Ray..." Though they began answering pretty nonchalantly, they paused, looking at Sonic with an unreadable expresion, "You."

The display sounded remorseful enough, so Nine was willing to interpret it as an attempt at a "sorry."

Either way, half of a boulder fell from their chest.

Maybe in the most tucked away corner within Sonic, there was a part that still cared for them. And always has. Maybe it wasn't all imagined after all.

The hedgehog tried to lift the Atlas Walkers after they toppled over in what was most likely a hasty escape out of them. Except he refused to bend down and actually adjust the boots properly so it ended up looking like a really poor attempt at football tricks.

Nine didn't even think to hold back a snicker right before the hedgehog booted himself back up and stood a few centimeters taller.

Still too short to reach their forehead.

They shared a look, barely actually being able to see each other and by the time Nine clapped to light up the tunnel, Sonic was already with his back towards them, but it no longer felt as hostile.

The silence going forward was also much more bearable and Nine's head cleared just a little bit. But they only got about two actual steps in when a distant thumping in an otherwise dead silent mine shook the walls.

[tomato-bird-art]

SF ZINEFEST 2024! Some pictures from the San Francisco Zinefest last week! I had a wonderful time, and it was SUPER busy! thanks everyone who swung by to pick up prints and zines from me, I really appreciate it. It was really heartening to see people enjoy my art and remember me from over the years—I’ve had a very busy year and not as much time to “be an artist” as I’d like, so it was very invigorating to be around other queer artists again in a dedicated and enthusiastic space. When online a lot, you tend to forget how it is to be around art in person, and this was a great reminder of it—also every year, I’m always excited to see the beautiful outfits and fashion of the attendees! Someday I’ll dress up more special, but alas it’s just work and apron for me XD

I also finally got to meet longtime mutual and incredible artist @megamoth in person, and got a copy of their Devilman zine series here I contributed to some years ago! Here’s a pic with a cool itabag as well.

This year, I debuted a few new works:

“Fujo X-Ray Visions”

is a collection of personal comics from the past year I’ve been posting here and on Patreon, mostly about trying to balance life as a cartoonist and as someone pursuing some new career experiences in the healthcare field. Like “Voids and Visions” before it, there’s a bunch of personal stuff and angsting along with regular goofiness.

It’s available now both as a physical zine, as well as a digital download!

“If All The World Were Mine!”

My collection of artwork and comics I’ve done for my medieval rpf side account, @angevinyaoiz over the past couple years. It’s a mix of some serious historical illustrations, goofy cartoons, and nsfw works. It’s probably one of the most “niche” things I’ve ever made or gotten into as of late, but I’m happy for the audience who has appreciated my work over the past several months. It’s available currently as a physical zine purchase on storenvy, and I’m planning on making an expanded digital zine version available later—fill out this form to be notified!

“Best Yaoi Movies of 20th Century Hollywood”

In this collaborative project I did with my friend @titilvating, in the style of classic cut and paste, copied zines, we offer our takes on 19 movies made before the year 2000. Many are acclaimed classics; some are underrated gems.  We made this zine to both introduce folks to the richness possibilities of classic movies; whether longtime cinephiles familiar with queer subtexts,  or young fujos looking for more material to sink their yaoifangs into.  Our sample size caters to our personal tastes rather than “good representation” and reflects a fraction what’s out there, with a focus on western US/European media, but hopefully can serve as a fun introduction and celebration. Old movies are a lotta fun, who would’ve thought?

It’s available now as a free digital download, but contact me if you’re interested in a physical edition as well!”

Other Works:

My print version of “The Sons of God” was very well received! I realized sometimes giving little titles to print pieces make for great conversation starters, and I got to chat a lot about my inspirations for the respective pieces. Grab a physical print here!

Ending Thoughts

Overall, I’m glad I got to meet lots of people this year and also pick up lots of zines! I didn’t have a chance to really browse this time around since it was so busy, but I got to trade a lot with folks and also pick up some cool zines and stickers myself.

For those who’d like to keep up with what I’m doing, follow me here, on Patreon, either as a member or free-follower, since I tend to post my sketches/WIPs there first. For me now, it’s back to the grind of school and also continuing creative projects. I have a lot of stuff I dream of doing, and it’s always a challenge to balance that with what needs to get done. If I learned anything from this event, it’s how valuable it is to connect with people in the real world art space (Something I always learn and forget like every few months.)…also, always bring water and snacks—can never be TOO prepared!

Wishing you all a good autumn,

-Allie

[nuttytani]

his vs your spice tolerance

characters: ieyasu, hideyoshi, mitsuhide, mai, gn!reader

warnings: none

a/n: I was daydreaming about spicy food during one of those boring lectures and then this happened. don't mind any typos or stuff, it's not proof read. p.s oh followers of mine, do you still wan't to get tagged on my hcs and fics? even though i pop in once in a century.

Ieyasu 

He’s known to be able to hold his spice

There hasn't been ANYONE who was able to surpass him in terms of spice tolerance

Enter: you 

Oh boy, he did not expect someone to handle spicier food than him

Genuinely feels scared as he watches you drown your meal in copious amount of hot sauce, roasted and cut chilli (yes, the green or red ones that grow on bushes) and straight up shove it in your mouth without a single flinch

He is scared. Saying that would be an understatement since he has tried your “food” once, and never again. Swears to not even dream about it. Ieyasu was crying his eyes out just from two bites and was chugging down glasses of water…. Which - uhh backfired. 

Needless to say but yasu was breathing fire like a dragon 

Now has profound admiration for your spice tolerance. No one can top you.

Hideyoshi 

He didn’t really have any spice tolerance from the start

Thinks you’re crazier than Ieyasu to…..be able to eat the demonic level of spice that you do

Doesn’t dare to even take a bite out of your food, he already knows that it would end badly for his mouth and his behind. 

But he does feel concerned about your health though, eating too much spice can be detrimental to your health after all

Somehow succeeds in making you eat at least a little less spice than before.

(actually, the only reason you reduced your spice intake was because of his puppy dog eyes. Darn em’ can’t say no to those shiny eyes)

Mitsuhide 

This man can’t even taste, what do you expect him to say about your abominable love for spice? Nothing.

Except, he does enjoy seeing you place a bottle of hot sauce and plenty of chillies on the side of your plate for every meal. 

Once, he exchanged your lunch box with Hideyoshi’s. For educational purposes. 

Gets punched in the face the very next day by Hideyoshi, who appeared to be unwell. 

He did try your food out of curiosity once, alas, no taste, but he did find the mild burning sensation on his tongue to be intriguing. 

You eventually make him addicted to eating whole chilli, ain't that nice? Better than eating random leaves in his garden (and who knows what else)

Bonus: 

Mai 

Thinks you’re some sort of godly specimen to be able to handle extremely spicy food.

Like, even Ieyasu is scared/amazed by your spice tolerance! 

She tries your food once, how bad can it be? Just a little bit of burning won’t stop her from trying it out!

Regrets immediately 

Curses her life choices and is now stuck in the toilet 

Is currently missing her 21st century western style toilets 

Gets the heebie jeebies whenever she looks at your food from then on

She does, however, tried eating whole chilli. After you taught her how to eat it like a pro

Mai is now unstoppable

Flaunts her newfound skill to eat chillies without a sweat to yasu. 

Gets kicked out of his room.

taglist : im sorry, i lost my old one- uhh if you guys ares still interested tho, let me know

[spaceorphanssecondbreakfastclub]

SO's Bookclub : The Viscount Who Loved Me

Title: The Viscount Who Loved Me Author: Julia Quinn Genre: Romance

Goodreads Summary :

Anthony Bridgerton hasn't just decided to marry—he's even chosen a wife! The only obstacle is his intended's older sister, Kate Sheffield—the most meddlesome woman ever to grace a London ballroom. The spirited schemer is driving Anthony mad with her determination to stop the betrothal, but when he closes his eyes at night, Kate is the woman haunting his increasingly erotic dreams...

Review:

It should not have taken me a month to read this, I've just been super distracted...

The second book of the Bridgerton series focuses on Anthony and Kate's romance, and I found it to be a lot of fun, actually. While this is only the second book I've read because I am reading them in order, I can already see why this ends up at or near the top of the lists.

If you've seen the show -- there's a lot that the show pulled from the book, more so than I had expected. It definitely hinges on that enemies to lovers-ish trope. (And while not a favorite of mine, personally, I think it's handled relatively well here.) Kate is a great protagonist -- she's smart and clever and holds her ground really well, which makes her someone to root for. Anthony is... fine. Look, I probably will never like these male heroes because they usually descend too far into anger and bad boy with a heart of gold figures out love when a level headed woman straightens him out gets a little old after a while. Plus, I do appreciate Jonathan Bailey bringing some great charm to the show that book Anthony lacks a bit.

But I think there's a lot of fun to this book, too. There's a real competitive spirit that's enjoyable to read. The pall mall, family stuff is great and a clear stand out in the book, which I can see why they adapted it. I also think the book does tension relatively well, and the push and pull between Kate and Anthony works!

I do still think there are times the book drags (I felt this in the previous book as well) where Quinn sometimes lets scenes go on for a little too long, or she gets repetitive within a scene. But as someone who isn't an outright fan of romance novels, and has read quite a few bad ones, Quinn is at least a solidly good writer, and it's a fairly quick and easy read.

The only plot thing that I took any issue with is the fact that two thirds of the way through, Anthony and Kate are forced to marry due to circumstances of the time, and I wish they could have not been forced into it? Part of it is the schtick of Anthony having to really fall in love with his wife, and I get that. But that kind of thing just isn't my cup of tea. All things considering, I really don't have a whole lot to complain about with this one.

One drawback coming from someone who's watched the show first, is the fact that these books are so focused on the couple, we don't get as much of a sense of the greater world. All the rest of the Bridgertons play a relatively small role (though it's nice to see Daphne and Simon back). Eloise shows up at the end for the first time as a little spy, which is cute. Colin continues to be a delight, though he's less in this one. I'm surprised Benedict was hardly here, and there's really no mention of the younger ones or even Violet. I will say, one of my favorite things, though, is that Kate and Penelope got to have an entire sequence where they strike up a friendship, and I did love that!

I was also kind of surprised that, while they were featured a lot in the first half of the book, Edwina and Mary don't play as big of roles in this book as I thought they would. They're still very important to Kate and her character, though, and their family unit is really nicely on display throughout.

Also, we end on another tease of Lady Whistledown, and I am so ready for it. But, alas, we have to get through Benedict's book first. So, let's do it!

Overall, I think if you liked the show, you probably would like this as well. It's fun and uses the tropes it sets up relatively well. It's still a regency based romance novel written in the early 2000s, but I think it is better than a lot of the same kinds of stuff written around and at the same time.

Rating : 4 stars

[somecallmejohn]

sleepy rose oneshot ideas (like after they confessed)

1.Simon sleeping but every time Asha is nearby, he would unconsciously move closer/cuddle to Asha

2.Simon having nightmares of killing Asha, has a panic attack, Asha calms him down, sleeping together

3.Simon got drunk, unwittingly flirts with Asha with the cheesiest pickup lines

4.Simon being overprotective of Asha and she gradually gets tired of it

can you write them all? I’m ok if you do it one by one. tho if not, what do you think? Good?

Okee... I really like those ideas even as headcanons, but I am gonna try and write just one of them (for now prolly).

I'm more of an illustrator than a writer, but again if I really want to write that queer Disney-esque fairy tale I've been thinking about for a long while, I will hve to practice my writing skills somehow.

Imma go with the second prompt since it's one I've actually thought about before as it is a headcanon of mine that Simon has some trauma from his brief time being brainwashed by Magnifico.

Anyway, enough yapping. It's time for some cringe writing from a wannabe writer.

(P.S. I altered the situation a bit to take place 2 or 3 months after the events of the movie and before Asha and Simon got together.)

(Post-writing note: this took longer than expected and I ended up writing more than I was planning. I also ended up using some headcanons I've shared in asks and sleepy rose headcanon post, which was kinda fun. Anyways hope you like it!)

It was dark and quiet in the deep woods, where only the snapping of twigs and the sprinting steps of a teenage girl could be heard.

Those stepping sounds belonged to Asha, a girl who had just recently found herself wanted for treason against the kingdom of Rosas. And all that for what? Because she believed that everyone deserved to own their wish and have the chance to chase it and make it a reality.

Asha was running as fast as she could. She didn't even dare to look behind her. But alas, all that running was for nothing as she found herself at a dead end. She tried to look for another exit, but it was already too late, for she could see in the shadows the glowing green eyes of the person chasing after her.

Out of the shadows emerged Simon, but no... This wasn't Simon... not anymore, at least. This was the King's loyal knight, his only knight that was a real human being and not an enchanted armor. Aquired by tricking a teenager so desperate to get the missing piece of himself back that he ended up bertraying the person he cared about the most.

"Oh, Asha..." The knight said with a voice that sounded familiar yet completely foreign to her ears as he was heading towards her."The King is waiting for you. It's a shame to leave him waiting, don't you think?"

His eyes were fixated on her and a menacing yet simultaneously apathetic expression was formed on his face.

"Simon, please, this isn't you!" Asha cried."You're under Magnifico's spell! I saw it! Once he put you in this armor, you've not been yourself ever since!"

He was getting nearer and nearer. Almost everything about him was unrecognizable. His posture, the way he moved, his expression even the way he was dressed.

"But, this is me, you see. Magnifico helped me make my wish come true and he could have done the same to you had you been loyal to Rosas."

At that point, he was just a breath away, towering over her.

"Come on Asha, just tell me where the star is and I promise you Magnifico will forgive you and reward you accordingly. You can have the life many dream of and..."

He took hold of her hand and his expression softened a little. It was as if the real Simon was talking now.

"We could be together at last."

Asha's cheeks flushed. She's had feelings for Simon for longer than she can remember and hoped he'd reciprocate them, but this was not the Simon she loved and this was not a deal she was willing to take.

"No! Never!" She exclaimed, pushing him away and attempting to run as far as she could, but she wasn't fast enough and he caught her by the hand almost instantly.

Everything went pitch black.

"I'm sorry it has come to this way, Asha" the knight said right before the sound of a sword being taken out of its case was heard.

"NO!" Simon exclaimed, waking up in cold sweat.

It was that nightmare again.

He was back at the royal kitchen. Everyone was looking at him. He had fallen asleep laying against the wall yet again.

His face went scarlet red seeing everyone's gaze pinned upon him, especially when he saw Asha's concerned expression.

"I-i..." he struggled to think of some excuse "forgot to bring some flour bags."

He then swiftly left the room to get to the pantry for more flour bags despite the kitchen having already a whole pile of them with enough flour to service them for at least a week.

It's been only a couple months since the redheaded teen had been brainwashed to be used as a pawn in the former King's scheme to capture Asha and Star and although it hardly lasted a day, the effects of that brief time were here to stay.

Every time Simon closed his eyes to sleep, the same type of nightmare would be playing in his head. He'd be in the woods with no control of his body or mind, dressed in the armor Magnifico put him in, chasing after Asha and it'd always end with her captured or something worse.

At first, this nightmare would only play at night. Despite his extreme need for sleep, Simon would keep himself awake at night by training for the upcoming Knight tryouts Queen Amaya had announced, to replace the enchanted armors that had lost any magic in them after Magnifico's defeat, and would take nap breaks during the daytime.

This plan had worked for a couple of days before the nightmares returned. He could no longer escape them and that took a toll on him. He got a lot more tired, failed the tryouts and gave up on his wish of being a noble knight.

With the repeating nightmares reminding him of what he did, he even distanced himself from his friends. He couldn't stand being around the same people he had let down, especially Asha, who he so selfishly betrayed.

Simon stayed in the pantry for a few minutes pretending he was looking for the right flour bags to bring back in the kitchen only for him to instantly fall asleep on a pile nearby.

He was back in the woods, dressed in his knightly attire, chasing after Asha. But, at the moment he was about to draw his sword, something different happened. He felt in control again and let go of it before he... woke up.

When he opened his eyes, he was greeted by the sight of Asha nudging him and asking him to wake up.

"Hmph... Asha?" he said groggily.

"Simon... are you alright?" she asked concerned.

But Asha entered his way placing her hand on his chest to stop him.

"Oh! I-i..." he exclaimed and with a forced smile, trying to sound as upbeat and awake as he could, he said,"Yeah, I'm doing great! Just... looking for the right flour bags." he added a fake chuckle as he stood up and grabbed the first two bags he saw before he proceeded to leave.

"Simon..." she repeated compassionately "you've been acting very strangely lately. You're as tired as ever, even more than you were when you gave your wish away to Magnifico, you've been avoiding us and Queen Amaya even told me that you refused her offer for a second chance at the knight tryouts. I thought being a knight was your wish. Why did you give up on that Simon?"

"I-i just ended up changing my mind." he mumbled struggling to wake up fully "Sometimes wishes change and that's what happened with mine."

"I don't believe that. Your wish was so strong you weren't the same without it, you can't have changed it so quickly!"

"Well, I have!" he said coldly and left with no further explanation.

Later that day, just when the sun had begun to set, somewhere deep in the woods at a spot near a lake, there was the redheaded teen who had just dismounted his horse.

His horse wasn't exactly his perse. It belonged to the royal mews, but Simon had nurtured and taken care of it ever since it was just a foal with the help of his father, who worked there. He'd often take it for a ride from time to time with permission from the queen.

Simon loved horse riding. It was his favorite pastime before he'd given his wish to Magnifico and he still loved it after taking it back. It was the only thing that could clear his mind whenever he felt overwhelmed after a day full of tiny nap breaks and the same nightmare playing in his head again and again.

As he let the horse go drink some water from the lake, Simon sat down under the nearest tree and took out his favorite book to read, it was a fairytale book his mother would read to him every night to sleep. He loved the stories about brave knights saving the maidens and he aspired to be just like them. Even if he had given up on his wish, he could still live through his favorite stories, or at least so he said to himself.

Just as he was about to begin reading, he heard stepping noises approaching him.

"Simon?" a familiar voice sounded

"Asha?" he said, surprised to see her "What are you doing here?"

"I was looking for you. You have no idea how worried I and our other friends are about you"

"But, how did you find me?" he asked

"We used to come over here a lot as kids, don't you remember?"

"Oh..." he said, his cheeks turning red "I forgot about that."

"You always loved how quiet it was here." she smiled as she sat next to him "Now tell me. What is going on with you?"

"I told you it was nothing" he said defensively

"Simon..." she placed her hand on his and looked him straight in the eyes "please."

He couldn't help it any longer. It pained him being so secretive and avoiding her and his friends. He wanted it to stop. He wanted the nightmares and the guilt to leave him alone. And he confessed everything about the nightmares and how they've been haunting him for the last few months.

"But Simon, I forgive you" she told him, setting her hand on his shoulder.

"But I don't deserve it!" he cried, tears beginning to form under his eyes. "You trusted me and I betrayed you!"

"And you regretted that and apologized for it and I forgave you. What more is there?"

"I-i don't know... I don't think I deserve to be your friend." he'd finally confessed, looking at the other way.

"Maybe the problem is that you haven't forgiven yourself yet." she suggested, setting her gaze elsewhere as well.

"What do you mean?"

"What I mean is that you're so hard on yourself for that mistake you did that even Gabo is concerned about what's going on with you."

"And what if I do "forgive myself" and the nightmares are still in my head? What do I do then?"

"I don't know, but..." she placed her hand on his again and set the other on his cheek to turn his gaze back to her."I'll be here for you"

The two teens kept staring at each other's eyes until Asha's gaze turned to the book Simon was holding.

"What are you reading?" She asked, curiosity filling her eyes.

"Just some fairytales"

"W-would you mind reading them aloud so that I can hear?"

"Sure!"

And so Simon began reading one of his favorite stories as Asha scooched in closer to him.

It didn't take long for the young sleep deprived man to fall asleep once again.

The nightmare played the same way as it always did, but for the second time that day around the end of it, he'd find himself in control again and this time he'd warn Asha about Magnifico's plan and help her go to the castle fast and stop him.

Simon woke up and next to him, Asha was still there and had also fallen asleep next to him with her head resting on his shoulder. The sky had darkened and the moon was up. The horse had even bent down and proceeded to sleep as well.

Simon eventually explained to his other friends about the nightmares and decided to accept the queen's second chance offer and begun training for the next tryouts. He even started taking Asha with him on horse riding sessions and stop by the same spot they fell asleep at where they'd sit to read other stories from the book and take small quick naps together, but this time they'd be home at their time or a little later than that.

He'd thought of waking her up, but ultimately, he ended up going back to sleep next to her. For the first time in a long while there was no nightmare playing in his head.

They stayed there for the remainder of the night and the morning when they returned home needless to say that neither Simon's parents nor Asha's mother were happy about what had happened, but for the two teens it was all worth it in the end, even if he got in trouble at the castle for the horse's longer than expected absence.

The nightmares didn't leave for a while. They came and went, making sleeping hard for Simon, but as time progressed and he began focusing more on his future than his past, they began to fade away until they were gone for good and never returned.

[sirenasmodeus]

Okay, so... hear me out for a sec; would I be crazy for adding "Would you fall in love would me again" from the Epic musical to the playlist I made for an Aegon x OC fic I have brewing. Because I feel like it's kinda the perfect song for Aegon and his half-sister's (OC) first conversation after their reunion after not seeing each other for like six years (because reasons).

Like think about it: Aegon as Penelope, spending years thinking about the one person he has had the best connection to— the one that he felt truly understood him— never giving up hope for years despite everyone having moved on with their lives.

Penelope's first verse :

Is it you? Have my prayers been answered? Is it really you standing there, or am I dreaming once more? You look different, your eyes look tired Your frame is lighter, your smile torn Is it really you, my love?

Imagine Aegon saying that to his sister. The hope that it's really her. The hope that he hasn't gone mad. The hope that his (effectively) other half has returned to him.

And then the second verse, Odysseus' verse:

I am not the man you fell in love with I am not the man you once adored I am not your kind and gentle husband And I am not the love you knew before Would you fall in love with me again If you knew all I've done? The things I cannot change Would you love me all the same? I know that you've been waiting, waiting for love

Her gently speaking to him, telling him— asking him— if he could ever reconcile the sweet, doting older sister that he knew with this older and twisted version, asking for his forgiveness for [redacted] and being scared that she has become something monstrous and unlovable in his eyes.

The love that is spoken about in the above verse, in regards to this fic, could be more familial (as of this moment, if you so wish) or more romantic in nature (when I actually end up getting to that during my writing of the fic), just like in its original and intended context.

Odysseus then, once Penelope asks, goes into detail about all the things he has done in the musical. That verse could be a symbolic of OC's own crimes because they obviously will not have both fought a cyclop and Poseidon, and "left a trail of red on every island" (though there will be some bloodshed if what I have in my head translates into writing).

I, however, have no idea how to translate the olive tree wedding bed into any coherent connection with what I plan for the fic, so alas that will remain unconnected.

But! Penelope's final verse can serve as a representation of Aegon’s devotion to his sister. His love and adoration have not dulled after years apart (but supposed [redacted] will definitely keep people away from each other).

I will fall in love with you over and over again I don't care how, where, or when No matter how long it's been, you're mine Don't tell me you're not the same person You're always my husband and I've been waiting, waiting

Anyhow, that's all I have in terms of deranged ranting ever since this thought took hold of me while I was eating supper 🙃

[flipyournoodles]

i thought i was going in prepared but i was not prepared cw for talk of shootings because thats what the movie revolves around.

obviously no i am not a tcc person nor do i condone shootings i feel like i shouldnt have to say this but alas. anyway if you choose to keep reading please do so with caution and stay safe

this movie was recommended to me by an old friend of mine and i decided to give it a try. it's on youtube for freebies and it's relatively short, just 80ish minutes, so i figured i'd watch tongiht and .fuck. i've watched zero day as well and honestly ive always considered that movie to be really well done in terms of its style and the message it's trying to convey, but yk. i cant really be vocal about it since tcc freaks are all over it like ants or perhaps flies. anyway i went into this movie knowing that the subject matter was similar to zero day but i was genuinely not prepared for this at all

i think a lot of it comes from identifying way too much with matt. theyre making a student film about getting revenge on a gang of bullies, and theyre the kind of kids that are like. really aggressiveand violent with it idk thats the best way i can describe it. and i feel like.. the red flags were there but people just didnt clock it until it was too late. and by then, like. the damage was already done. and i know saying 'oh i relate to matt' is suspicious but i mean it more in the way of how he just straight up loses his grip on reality. and how he doesn't even notice until it's practicallytoo late for him. and when he does notice it's so clear how frightened he is. and maybe im just hella projecting but i think the bullying they faced affected matt really badly and his escapism was through movies. he's got shit like uhh. pulp fiction, requiem for a dream, thats all shit that was posters in his room. and then he's making logos for his film that are riffing off of other films, like back to the future, and star wars, and shti like that and. owen talks about how matt acts like he's in a movie all the time, cameras or not, being totally fucking crazy like he's acting in a movie and how he doesnt know when matt is being genuine or if he's just acting, and. jesus man that hit home. like i think a lot of it is just that i have Movie Autism i fucking love moveis and so seeing all the movie references made me really relate to this guy but also the fucking escapism that devolves into delusion and being unable to separate that from reality and not even knowing who you really are anyomre. that part hit home i think. and i just look back on how fucked up i was as recently as a year ago and i think to myslef thank god i noticed. like, thank god i was able ot realize what was happening before i totally lost my grip on reality. because the part where he realized that he fit the exact definition of the way dave cullen described real life shooters that i will not name (they read an excerpt from that book! with permisison from cullen himself. idk i just think it's interesting and says a lot about the writers of the film that they reached out to thewriter and asked permission to read an excerpt in their movie. idk) and the fucking genuine emotion when he says that to owen and then owen just does not care what if i started sobbing right now

im surprised at how. idk. theres a scene at the end where he does kill someone, and i was expecting it to be like a total bloodbath (again, my only frame of reference is zero day which i havent watched in. idfk a year) but no. and yet somehow it's so much more impactful than the end of zero day. because he starts chasing after his friend and when he has him cornered and owen is fucking frightened and genuinely i think matt just doesnt Get It. he doesnt understand. and he goes 'what are oyu doing? its me!' adn fuck dude i know im reading way too far into this but like . hes saying that hes been like this the whole time! and hes confused why owen changed on a dime ebcause to himthis is the next logical step!! fuck!!!! and the worst part is i knew it was fucking coming adn yet i was telling myself no way. no way.

will i watch it again? probably not the whole way through, because i did just straight up start sobbing (and i've only cried atlike. two movies? three maybe?) and it fucked me up. but my god that movie was fantastic. if you're comfortable with the material it goes over and are able to stomach it, i do highly recommend it. fuckin hell what a film

[jupitermelichios]

rejected riverdale fic ideas

sam and dean winchester hear about the gargoyle king and assume he must be supernatural and spend three weeks chasing a sentient teleporting pile of sticks around the woods before figuring out it's not actually teleporting there's just like 6 different people all concurrently wearing the costume and murdering people

the teen wolf gang take a vacation in riverdale and get trapped in the town's temporal vortex (personally I like to think of it as the timehole but many disagree) and have to figure out how to escape

chose your own adventure fic where you have to stop archie from becoming aware that he's in a fictional narrative and going on a murder spree (again)

jughead jones makes a deal with bill cipher and unleashes weirdmageddon and the gang have to defeat him

the gang discover FP made a deal with bill cipher and unleashed weirdmageddon years ago and that's why riverdale is Like That. no one defeats him, they figure out the mystery and then just go on with their lives because they're all used to it

betty cooper and hannibal lecter team up to fight the trashbag killer

instead of going to hell when he dies, dean winchester accidentally takes a wrong turn and ends up in the great big diner in the sky, riverdale's canonical afterlife, and cas has to figure out how to get him back before someone notices that he lost the michael sword

the same except it happens instead of going to purgatory rather than hell, and benny is the new line cook at pops. he's still a vampire. this is never explained.

instead of whitby, dracula lands in riverdale and the gang have to stop him lucy westernra-ing cheryl

betty the vampire slayer

a tokyo ghoul fusion where it's revealed that half the cast are man-eating monsters disguised as humans. surprisingly little changes except that they resolve the farm plotline by eating edgar evernever.

cheryl's parents are revealled to be hydra agents and they try to use the winter soldier to assassinate hiram lodge but the power of friendship and milkshakes restores bucky's memories

mystery inc investigate the gargoyle king and reveal him to be clifford blossom after a series of light-hearted slapstick chase scenes. the riverdale gang are fully aware that mystery inc are opperating on cartoon logic, and are deeply disturbed by this

instead of washington, warlock's parents move to riverdale, and aziraphale and crowly have to live there while they co-parent the antichrist. (they both notice that tabith is an angel but assume she is aware of this and are much too polite to mention it to her)

cheryl blossom joins the x-men

cheryl blossom joins the brotherhood of evil mutants

toni topaz is given the outsider's mark after empress cheryl is murdered and must rescue britta from the loyalist conspiracy

betty is recruited to the beareau of control

the doctor visits riverdale and reveals that it's actually one of the time war battlefields, hence the timehole, and the gang are all daleks, except reggie, who is a timelord

Cheryl's russian spy parents open a gateway to the upsidedown in the palladium mines under riverdale and unleash a demogorgon on the town

archie is superman and veronica is lex luthor and riverdale is smallville

the entire show is revealed to be evelyn evernever's dream, and also evelyn is confirmed to exst in the tommy westphall universe

what if riverdale but a harem anime

archie is bella swan and veronica and betty are edward and jacob.(jughead is alice. obviously).

stranger things except instead of the upsidedown the dimensional gateways open onto rivervale

just the show loki except instead of the junkyard people the tva pruned go to riverdale. richard e grant loki becomes the new principle at the high school

after archie becomes aware that he's in a fictional narrative, he gains the ability to enter the white space between comics pannels and joins the x-statix

jughead is revealed to be entirely in archie's head, ala fight club

inception fusion where archie and the gang have to go inside hiram's mind to convince him not to bulldoze riverdale to make way for more paladium mines

dilton doily moves to nightvale to work with carlos the scientist and finds to surprisingly peaceful

regency au where alice cooper has to find respectable husbands for betty polly and ethel before anyone finds out about her husband being a serial killer and they become socially ruined

[sparrow-in-the-field]

Writer's Tag Game

Tagged by @strangethings-everywhere !! Thanks Anna!

Rules: Answer some or all of the questions below. Tag your fellow writers. Enjoy!

Link to your masterlist: I don't have a masterlist but here is my ao3! Not gonna bother linking my other ao3 account but if you ever want some BTS content just hmu and I got you lol.

Favorite and least favorite genres to write (angst/smut/fluff, etc): Favorite is for sure some hurt/comfort! Least favorite is any angst that doesn't have a happy ending, I just can't do it lol.

Favorite characters to write for? That's a hard question! I enjoy writing both Bobby and Don, it's hard to choose which I prefer lol; I've really been loving writing Bobby in The Cormorant though so maybe I'll say him. And Chuck Day! I looove writing Chuck, he was such a pleasant surprise when I wrote So Far So Good.

Which one of your works is your favorite? How am I supposed to pick one of my babies?? Lol. I mean, The Cormorant is so incredibly special and dear to me, I think that one will be my favorite for a long time even once it's finished. Out of my completed works, though, a kind of dark horse favorite is The Inherent Value of Warmth and Breath. I wrote that one soooo spontaneously but it turned out so well! I think it has a great balance of action and romance for just a little one shot.

Which one of your works is more popular than you thought it would be? It honestly still blows my mind that The Quiet Act of Loving Someone is the top kudos'ed fic in tbitb tag on ao3 (it just passed 200 kudos btw!! thanks for all the love! <3). Like I never thought something like that would happen with my fics.

Which one of your works is less popular than you thought it would be? So Far So Good my beloved!! I maybe went into it with too high expectations, because people had really loved Shy Boy, so I thought more people would be excited for a sequel. But alas, I guess Chuck/Roger isn't quite as popular. It still got some very nice love though, so I really can't complain!

Which one of your fics was hardest to write? Why? The Cormorant is definitely the hardest to write, but in a super rewarding way. There are just a lot of moving pieces (literally, with Bobby traveling lolol), and figuring out the timing of the month counting down, along with the balance of present day scenes, flashbacks, and dreams with Jack, it takes a lot of consideration for like, structure and organization. And then just thematically, it's very heavy and emotional to write. Which I love, it's so cathartic, but tbh sometimes I have to take breaks and think happy thoughts lol (such as post-fic fluff ideas for Bobby and Don hehe).

What is your favorite fanfic by someone else? Omg okay I'm limiting myself to three (and I'll try not to gush too much lol) but as Anna said there are so many amazing fics in our little fandom!! A huge favorite of mine is Someone Like You (I'm Ready) by teaforone ( @teaforarteza ) on ao3. This fic had me in an absolute chokehold and I still think about it to this day; the messy start, the stakes, the love confessions, the smut?? People died (me). It was also the first fic I read that emphasized Chuck and Bobby's friendship, which was eye opening. Next, I can't talk about fav fics without mentioning salix's (@seasidesandstarscapes )hockey au, Right in the Numbers!! Talk about messy lol, I was screaming at Don throughout this whole fic, and I fell in love with cam boy Bobby! Lastly, and most recently, I was so incredibly taken by effervescentyellow's (@effervescentyellow ) fic As Beautiful As You. It almost made me cry! There's just this overwhelming sense of warmth and acceptance and love, it feels like being wrapped in a cozy blanket and being told everything is going to be okay. It's so amazing.

Tags: umm I guess since I mentioned them above, I'll tag @effervescentyellow !

[mx-lamour]

9 - Kiss

[Sonnet time! + audio!]

1 He tells a story of his homeland, far beyond the reach of Strahd von Zarovich. The name means little in this foreign war against the the Tergs and other Goblyns, which in turn mean nothing much to him who knows that only gardens tended grow to height and this one calls him, so he willing goes to make his bed and cull the weedy blight. When someday settles down this solemn place, his duties sparse in times of earn-ed peace, perhaps he’ll speak again of home and taste the nectar of his hard-won harvest feast.    When Alek Gwilym goes to fight for this,    he sometimes dreams of one begrudging kiss...

2 I vowed that I would heed thee for all time A promise I would pride myself to keep Protect and guard thee as if thou were mine And I would sow, that thou might always reap

Alas, thy deepest hunger waits for her Whose quiet beauty piqued a jealous rage One heart so tangled with another, turn’d And trap’d thy soul within a misty cage

If only thou hadst spared my tender wound So vicious made upon the waxing night Had not then slaked on blood which there did bloom And stolen all the years which were thy right

   If only thou didst ask for my whole life    The whole I'd give—though not, myself, a wife

3 The lips of every enamored lay would sure be tempting on this stormy night. To sate himself on loving flesh--but, nay, a plot of gruesome treason lays in sight. There is no room for error, now he knows what young malignant traitor lurks within the castle walls—and then the darkness grows and bounds upstairs to head him off again. To witness there his lord’s own deep unrest but glimpsed in candlelight through window yon, has carved the heartbeat hollow in his chest; replaced it with ensuing dread—No dawn    will light upon the face of either man    when darkest powers gain the upper hand.

4 My love, I will not wander from thy side Command me now to leave thee, all alone, And I would find it hardest to abide What dark despair hath gripped thee to the bone?

Please open up thy window glass to me And leave us not to horrors of the night I know not what might muster hope to thee But we’re together now, love… It’s all right

Upon thy face I read a thousand frights However time doth lead me here again Despite the hour of the ageless night I’ll find a way back to your side, old friend

   Thou tellest me I’ll not remember this…    Wouldst thine own heart forget thy fervent kiss?

* * * In the end, this was relevant to #4 - Bloodstain [Ao3 Collection] [prompt list by @syrips]

[ac1dmeow]

story prompt.

heyy.. so i had a dream🫢☠️ that i had a while ago that i personally think could make a really swell enemies to lovers fanfic. so i’m going to talk about it so the writers on here can make their own series out of it if they so please. (please make a series out of it it’s a desperate need i beg-).

for some backstory:

y/n’s parents are good family friends with the ortega’s, as well as her cousins. they grew up together living in the same town and going to the same schools, etc etc.

but y/n has always been quiet and awkward since she was young and often got teased for it, making her vulnerable to bullies. she tried her hardest to be accepted, but alas, it never really worked. jenna knew this, but never really went out of her way to do something about it.

the two were much closer when they were little, but eventually parted more and more as they got older and made their own friend groups. jenna was relatively popular and did really well in school, but y/n struggled and didn’t make as much deeper connections as she did.

the two ended up in an argument that would end up changing the trajectory of their relationship. one day sometime during middle school, jenna said something without the intention of being rude, which set off y/n’s insecurities and made her snap. (you can make this be whatever you want).

after that, the two couldn’t stand being around each other, each of them believing they were arrogant bitches and more☠️..

things stayed the same throughout high school. however sometime halfway through, feelings started to blossom that passed the line of platonic. of course the two denied it and pushed those thoughts away, not daring to mention it to anyone.

after graduation the two would nearly never see each other for a year until summer, after their first year of university/collage.

now for the actual plot:

y/n’s parents, her cousin’s parents, and the ortega’s, made an arrangement to all spend two weeks during the summer to spend time, do activities, or whatever, as some sort of fun reunion. throughout these two weeks they do many things (sneaking out obvi). but there’ll be moments where things are very died down, a little tense since y/n and jenna are in the same room or something... ykwim? (que one bed trope). they’re forced to work things out and go through many unwanted situations and problems. but they eventually come to an understanding and have a cute ending ☺️☺️.

a lot is filler i had to make up myself to help the story make sense since my dream lowkey didn’t that much. i didn’t put too much detail because i want to leave it open for other’s interpretation and ideas. me being mad at her for poking at an insecurity of mine and spending the summer with her and my cousins was in my dream, but the rest is what i made up myself afterwards. so please, if you have something more interesting, or a stronger backstory that’ll make the story better or something then by all means go ahead. you can choose whether jenna is famous or not, doesn’t matter. you can make it as mature as you want if that’s how you write, or you can make it more light hearted and humorous, or you can even make it both. i’d really love to see your takes, headcanons, and backstories for something like this 😭.

if you read till the end then thank youuu i actually appreciate it. i hope this sounded interesting enough👩🏼‍🦲.