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animeyanderelover · 12 days ago

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This will be my first request, I am very happy because I LOVE your writing.

Alas aside, Yandere falls in love with a woman older than them who is very maternal for having a child, when he proposes she rejects him because she feels that they should not waste themselves on a woman who already has a child (You can do with the father whatever you want ).It would be with Atsushi, Akutagawa, Daichi Sawamura, Oikawa and if you want to add any more I don't mind

Sorry for my bad english😘😘

Tw: Yandere themes, possessive behavior, obsession, delusional behavior, clinginess, manipulation, stalking, threats, violence

Tags: @shumidehiro @leveyani

You shouldn’t waste your time on me

Sawamura Daichi

🌅Cries of a small child are what guide him through the crowds on that day, his eyes flickering over the people before they finally land on the boy who is standing there all alone. Upon asking him what happened the child tells him that he got distracted and lost his mother. As not only a police officer but also a decent human being Daichi immediately helps, asks the boy where him and his mother were last together and if he knows where his mother planned to go. If worst comes to worst and he won't be able to find the boy's mother he'll just ask the boy where he lives and will bring hm home to wait together with him until his mom returns. Luckily it never comes that far as Daichi is able to find you after half an hour of searching, the boy instantly leaving his side and running to you with tears in his eyes. He's far too humble in your eyes as he is confronted with your gratefulness, tells you that he only did his job and that anyone would have helped a crying child. Still, you make some small talk with him as you ask for his name and both of you start talking for a while with each other. That's how he finds out that you recently moved to the Miyagi prefecture with your child and live close to his neighbourhood.

🌅The fact that he doesn't live far away from you and that he helped your child are major reasons that aid the two of you in getting so close to each other. Also, your son's dream is it to work for the police later on so he obviously views Daichi as his hero, something that flusters the man deep down a lot more than he shows. He visits you once a week when he has a free day, often bombarded with questions from your son about his job until you softly chide your child for his uncontrolled excitement. You admit to him relatively early that you moved here because your husband died and your parents live nearby as you also need to work and need someone to look after your son. Hearing that your husband died strangely enough makes more sense to him than if someone would have divorced you as only an ignorant fool would have let someone like you go. Daichi is not even going to deny his own feelings, he knows that he's extremely attracted to you. You're kind yet not too coddling, you're responsible and patient, you listen to the worries of others and are always willing to help where you can. Watching you raising your son sometimes reminds him of his high school days, a fond look on his face.

🌅Daichi is able to stay patient in spite of his obsession, especially if the loss of your husband has been very recent. He gives you time, he allows you to grieve and focuses in the meantime on helping you and your child to integrate into the new city. The thing is that he fills that role of a supportive husband and father so nicely that neighbours and even your own parents and son can't help but support the two of you getting together. When you reject him he is a bit disheartened but he takes it really well because he realises that you didn't do so because you do not love him. You reject him because you feel not good enough but that in itself is still quite hurtful. You're such a wonderful person after all. He doesn't mind the little age gap nor does he think of you less because you have a child. In fact he's grown very fond and protective of your son who you have raised wonderfully. Still, it's wiser to not pressure you so he steps back for now. His confidence remains though, knowing that you didn't deny not being able to see him as a partner. He'll just stay in your life as a pillar of support for now and will slowly make you realise that you are everything but a waste to him.

Oikawa Tooru

👑After a difficult divorce you make the decision to completely change your life and decide to try to reach for a dream you had when you were younger but gave up later on, deciding that you might not make it. It's better to try and fail then to never take the step. After many months of interviews, exchange of mails and documents you receive the news though. You did it. You're one of the managers for your favorite volleyball club, Club Athletico San Juan. You're so joyous, almost feel like a school girl all over again as you read the letter over and over again, kicking your feet and grinning like an idiot. Oikawa is still Oikawa even if he is by now an adult, his charming attitude still there as soon as you're introduced to the team as their new manager. His other teammates just watch with half amusement and half pity as Oikawa's charm ultimately never works. Sure, he manages to charm people quickly but he never manages to hold a relationship and they would hate for their setter and new manager to be on bad terms from the very start. You, with the divorce still freshly on your mind though, put your foot firmly down and clarify it to Oikawa very clearly that you have no intention of dating.

👑Obviously Tooru is miffed about your blunt rejection yet another part of him can't help but respect your determination. You know what you want to focus on and he wants to acknowledge that, especially since he is essentially the same. The keyword here is want because who would have thought that his feelings would slip out of his grasp of control so quickly? You know when to put him and his childish antics in his place, chiding him almost as if he were a child and the experience feels only more realistic when he realises that you're a few years older than he is. The fact that you work so closely with him only enables him to be very overbearing as he dreams up all kinds of minor inconveniences so that he has something to complain about to have your attention on himself. Your daughter is a shocker as you have never talked about your private life before and whilst other players gush over your child he gives her a strange look at first, his mind trying to process what it could mean. He pesters you privately about it, his eyes desperate and his body tense. The tension leaves his body at least partially when you admit with a heavy sigh that you had a rough divorce before you started working here.

👑Oikawa doesn't take the rejection very well, his heart dropping even though it doesn't have to do with the fact that you don't see him that way. Still, it is hard to stay logical with a heart as sensitive as his, especially since he is prone to being delusional. He just doesn't understand. What is it that he could have done better?? He has made it more than obvious that he is deeply in love with you. He's showered you in presents, constantly demands your attention and has even made the effort to get closer to your daughter despite initial caution he held. Is that still not enough?? What do you want him to do?? Please tell him what he as to do in order for you to accept. Honestly, your maternal instincts will come quite in handy as you're confronted with Tooru whilst his feelings threaten to burst out of him. Because it helps him to calm down and gives him the reassurance he so desperately craves from you in that moment. Nevertheless though, he ramps up his affection from a 10 to an 11 after that incident. If the problem is simply that you don't feel good enough he will change your mind. You're forgiven this one time. Do not reject him a second time though or else he might just make your job more difficult.

Nakajima Atsushi

🐅The gentle love of a parent is a notion so foreign to Atsushi that the first encounter he has with you leaves him almost on the edge. Your kind words, the patient look in your eyes, the warmth and comfort you provide him with by simply being in the room threatens to burst his heart right at the seams. After cold deprivation for as long as he can remember your presence feels like being drowned in a bathtub filled with hot water. It's overwhelming almost, scorches his skin yet he gladly submerges himself in the heat and the sensations that come with it. He's almost immediately infatuated with you, finds himself yearning for your affection in his dreams as well as in the real world. The age difference is something that weights on his soul though as he realises how experienced you are and how clumsy he seems to be in comparison. There's a lack of knowledge with certain machines or customs that he hasn't been exposed to due to his time in the orphanage but he is always too ashamed to tell you about it. Adamant to not let himself look like a young fool in front of you, Atsushi simply refuses to ask for help or advice from you. He wants to prove to you as well as himself that he can provide for you.

🐅As shameful as it is, there is an undeniable twinge of jealousy directed against your own child. He envies the little boy for being able to cling to you as often as he does as those are all things Atsushi desperately wishes to do as well. He wants to be held, comforted and loved by you too but he could never admit such things as he stares at your son. What would you think of him after all if he were to confess to you that he feels jealous of your own child? It doesn't stop him from clenching his hands into fists every time he witnesses you giving affection to your son, nails turning into claws as he imagines what it would be like if he were to be the one in your child's position. You and your husband have parted ways a few years ago but you still keep in contact due to the child and that just about kills Atsushi. It takes always more willpower than it should to not outright growl at the man whenever he visits. Atsushi can't even fathom how a man could let someone like you go and occasionally he imagines what it would be like to just tear that man apart whenever his jealousy gets the better of him. Chances aren't exactly zero for Atsushi to confront your ex-lover and accidentally kill him during an argument.

🐅The beast within him tries to tame itself as good as it can for you even if results are mixed. With time he grows closer to your child though he struggles to be a parent for the little boy as he more than once acts just as childish and needy. Still, he does his best to show you that he can protect and provide for you and your child all whilst seeking emotional comfort from you. It has taken him a good chunk of courage to finally confess to you only to be met with a direct blow to his heart. The shock of your rejection numbs him for a few seconds before the weight comes crushing down. He hyperventilates, he cries, he bites his bottom lip bloody and his nails threaten to rip through the skin of his palms. That is only because he does misunderstand your rejection as you telling him that you have no interest in him. Once he has come to understand that you didn't reject him for that reason hopefully he manages to calm down at least a bit. That means that he still has a chance, doesn't he? Still, he feels like it's his fault for not having made it clearer to you just how deeply infatuated he is with you. That has to change now. Hopefully some of his seniors can give him useful tips how to woo you.

Akutagawa Ryunosuke

��It is through Gin that Akutagawa finds out about you as his beneath the mask quite shy sister has befriended you and finds herself visiting your small shop once a week. Whilst he is anything but an overbearing brother this piece of information still manages to stick to him. It's the first time he has heard that Gin has made friends with someone outside the Mafia and initially he starts directing hostility against you. Akutagawa isn't an individual to trust easily as he distrusts with far more confidence and this is what he finds himself doing against you. Who are you? Are you really just a regular citizen? His sister assures him that you are not some spy nor does she plan to give you any information about the Port Mafia or her real identity but for Akutagawa actions speak louder than words. He finds himself stalking you occasionally, dark eyes trailing after you. A scoff appears on his face the moment he notices the boy following you, realising that you have a child. How naive you must be, keeping a child whilst involving yourself with a mafioso. If you really are just a normal person you must have no motherly senses at all or else you wouldn't hang out casually with Gin.

⬛Akutagawa never had a mother who raised him as he has grown up in a violent environment from a very young ago. None of his mentor figures have ever given him even an ounce of affection which has led him to believe that love is a weakness. A weakness he has fallen victim to. A part of him itches to use Rashomon to tear you and that little brat apart yet he holds himself back. Partially because his emotions are messy and partially for his sister's sake as she cherishes you. It's Gin he turns to as his curiosity grows and it is through her he finds out most information about you. The most pressing issue for him is who the father of your son is and even if Gin tells him that you have parted with the guy long before your child was born that doesn't stop Akutagawa's urges to rip that man apart for his mere existence. Stalking you becomes quite difficult, his possessive side flaring up the moment you talk to another man and give him a smile. It's the horrified gaze of his sister that holds him back but that is no guarantee that it'll work every single time. Only to his sister is he able to admit his conflicting feelings to you and both of them know that it is only a question of time when you will find out.

⬛Still, even if it comes that far Gin wishes for her brother to not terrorise and hurt you even with his obsession. She cares for Akutagawa but you're still her friend and she likes your child as well. She wants him to attempt to confess to you the normal way at least once and if you reject him she kind of knows that there's little she can do. Unable to live with herself if she wouldn't try though Gin introduces her brother to you who finds himself incredibly awkward as he is completely out of his comfort zone, easily irritated and with little patience, especially when your son is around. Big chance that Gin is lurking around in the distance when Akutagawa tries confessing, already looking like he is glaring at you. He honestly only knows what to do in case you reject him because you don't like him which is instantly doing what he can do best. Inflicting fear upon you whilst using Rashomon. He isn't prepared for you rejecting him because you think he shouldn't bother with you and is left so perplexed with that answer that he just stares at you for a good while. Ultimately this only delays the abduction though because it'll still happen. He's promised Gin to not harm your son though.

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z3rinn · 1 year ago

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# #. GROCERY STORE !! pt. 2

a part 2 to my grocery store post !! This time it contains scarabia - diasomania ! ahem- going grocery shopping is usually a mundane task, boring and usual. that is until the twst boys want to join you in your outing. you just hoped nothing would go wrong this time… for once…

Sorry this took so long to get out !! I hope you all enjoy !! ♡

# #. KALIM AL-ASIM

Going grocery shopping with Kailm is definitely an experience. Its basically like bringing a kid to a candy store. He is ogling at everything around him. That's when you realize he's probably never even been to a grocery store-

By the way he's running around and pointing at everything- putting as many things in the cart as possible- (which you would not be able to pay for) you would like to place him in the baby seat of the cart, but alas he can't fit. So you just settle for placing him in the cart instead. Its at times like this you can imagine where Jamil is coming from. But its ok because he's a cutie patootie and i love him w all my heart- Oh! And just know that he finds the ride absolutely delightful.

Kalim tries to take turns with you when riding the cart, pushing you around the store while laughing happily. He walks into aisles youve never even seen before, showing off weird things that are fascinating to the both of you. Like that self washing cup! Or those lava lamps that costs well over 5000 thamarks !! But he could easily pay for them. You never thought grocery shopping could be so fun- and so you can't help but smile back at his amusement, joining along as the two of you ran around target.

9/10 it's a little overwhelming at first, yet going with him just makes you happy beyond words. Plus he pays!

# #. JAMIL VIPER

Jamil is obviously one of the best people to go grocery shopping with. He's a food expert, and he knows exactly what to get and do while there. Plus, he is most likely tagging along with you to get some things for the Scarabian kitchens.

As I said, Jamil's a food expert, and he knows just what to buy and get while out. Like I said in my previous post, Ruggie knows how to haggle with grocery store managers- and I think Jamil does too. He knows what products are the best, yet are also the cheapest, it's not like he's paying with Kalim's money. (Although he did offer to give you his card!) Jamil is also the type to not get distracted while out, so whenever you try to but something you definitely don't need, he'll snap you back in place.

While out with him make sure not to buy any frozen food, as it'll make him think your prefer that over his fresh and healthier food. And he'll give you a judging look due to it. Oh! And he's gonna cling to you the entire time. This is one of the only moments he'll be able to hang out with you without having to worry about any of his duties and Kalim. So don't question it if he holds on to you or if he's pressed up against you the entire time.

10/10, I'd go with him any day of the week. It doesn't even have to be to the grocery store smh.

# #. VIL SCHOENHEIT

Vil is taking you to some fancy ass grocery store. Like whole foods or sprouts, maybe even the mall. Or whatever the twst equivalent is. As if he'll you just go to some random grocery store- And with him- it's not gonna be all fun and games -_-

He immediately takes you to the veggie and fruits section, piling on good enough amounts of spinach, broccoli, tomatoes. He also buys fruit for his homeade smoothies, those will make your skin glow for days afterwards. It's annoying- you just want your chips- but you cant because of the preservatives. You just want some cookies. Yet you cant. Honestly you were this close to just falling to the floor and crying your heart out like a frenchman. "I JUST WANT MY JUNK FOOD" Shopping with him just seems like a chore instead of something fun tbh.

He's right in front of the cart, dropping only the necessities into it. You were this close to running him over the cart if he slapped your hand one more time for trying to reach out to the chips. He gives you a glare, and tries to resist your puppy eyes. With a click of his tounge he eventually does calm down, dropping a bag of Cheshire Chips into the cart. He might allow it if you come over to Pomefiore to do some face masks with him.

5/10. It's like going shopping with a mom or like a weight trainer or smth. You understand why he's doing this of course- But theres no funny business with him. Zero. Sigh. Well he pays at least. I LOVE HIM I SWEAR-

# #. ROOK HUNT

When Rook notices you walking out of the broken down building you were staying in, from the tree right above your house, he obviously offered to accompany you on your endeavor! Even when you told him you were just going to the grocery store a part of him just couldn't help but be overjoyed. Oh how he just loved being out with you!

Rook is notorious for loving the smallest of details- the simplest things in life. So going to a grocery store and seeing all the beautiful people surrounding him- along with the gorgeous displays of food made his heart practically smile. You watch as he holds an apple in his hands, raising it up to the sky with a glorious smile on his face. (You're this close to just walking away-) He's humming in joy as he recites a poem of the luscious, juicy, red apple to you. Very fun !!

Meanwhile- when Rook is not being a hopeless romantic for apples, the huntsman is all fun and games !! He's straight up singing in the store, admiring anything and everything. He watches as you shop for groceries, a smile on his face. Rook lets you sit in the cart whenever you get tired, pushing you across the store while humming to himself lightly. Just don't say you're getting tired while going back. He'll carry you all the way back.

8/10- he's a bit over bearing at times. But its Rook so like what can you say about it? I love Rook yall.

# #. EPEL FELMIER

Epel is tagging along for two very important reasons! Firstly, his family has branched out to stores all across twisted wonderland- and he obviously has to make sure the quality and presentation were absolutely perfect! Secondly, he gets to hang out with you!

Epel makes his way to the fruits aisle first, dragging you along with a bright smile. His excitement is slowly seeping into you, causing you to laugh yourself. The two of you make your way to the fruits section, the both of you gawking and jumping up and down happily. After that little moment its basically a normal shopping spree. He has experience in going out to the grocery store with his family- so he helps out with practically everything!

He tries to show off as much as he can. He'll help out with the water packets, and baskets carrying them if your hands get tired. He will jump up to grab the snacks you need- that might be too high for you reach. Speaking of snacks - Being out with you lets Epel get junk food and snacks that Vil would NEVER allow- so maybe the two of you can sneak them in the middle of the night.

10/10 !! One of the best to go with! He doesn't bother you whatsover and is very helpful. Guys I love Epel so much KDHDVFTSSKS

# #. IDIA SHROUD

Uhhh- your more likely going to a electronics store- and then maybe stopping at the grocery store on the way back. There's NO way Idia would ever go out to a grocery store on his own. Especially if Doordash exists. But if you stop by an electronics store first, and you need a handsome firey head boy to show you around the store. How could he ever refuse??

He felt like a prince, leading you through his castle while showing off all his prized possessions. While in reality he was just walking through Best Buy or something, and was being an unemployed clerk. He probably pays for your electronics- or maybe he says he'll just make them for you! His designs are 100 times better obviously. However on your way out, he doesn't expect you to point out the whole foods or twst version is across the street.

He basically just sticks to you like a shadow while out. The poor dormleader can't help but be scared that people are gonna judge him for being blue all over. That is until you tell him this was your little shojou moment. Walking out in a supermarket together, inspecting what brand of eggs or milk you should get. It's the whole package! Well obviously now he can't complain. But now he might be just a bit too excited to be here.

6/10 Honestly if you needed groceries that badly you could've just asked him to order from online. Doordash is sooo much easier that doing it the plain (and scary) way.

# #. ORTHO SHROUD

Ortho probably tagged along to experience the "real" life. He's seen families on TV before- and he can't help but crave that domestic lifestyle. So when you ask if he wants to tag along- how could he ever refuse?

He's buzzing with excitement! Hovering around the grocery store with stars in his eyes. Usually he orders groceries from the comfort of his brother's dorm- it's a lot easier that way- but going outside is just so fun !! Ortho might even switch to his P.E form, as it'll make it easier for him to walk around the store like you! Although, he does want to try riding in the cart, it's something that everyone wants at least once in their lives- so how could you say no?

He's very helpful too, it's common courtesy since you took him out in the first place. He's able to reach high places and doesn't have trouble carrying the heavy things. Another plus is if your shy (like his brother) he's able to scan the store and find whatever you're looking for- without asking any employees for help! Sweetie pie fr.

10/10. He's one of the best to go with! Plus no complaints here (like his older brother)

# #. MALLEUS DRACONIA

Malleus? Why does he go??? He just wants to hang out with you. And maybe see how human grocery stores are nowadays. But its mainly the first one. Perhaps when the two of you are out on one of your nightly walks- you suddenly remember that, "Oh no! You forgot to get groceries!!" And now you have to take a menacing dragon man out with you.

Like others, Malleus tags along behind you, inspecting the many products and items in the aisles. He asks questions about products he finds interesting, he'll inspect all the different kinds of fruits (dragon fruits especially), and he'll find different products to try out. He'll always ask you for help too, asking if something is good enough to get. Like that tamagotchi in the corner !! He should get a bunch of friends for Roaring Drago...

He's so oblivious and confused it's kind of funny. Just imagine being a little kid and seeing a giant- like a literal GIANT- standing in the ice cream aisle inspecting the icecream sandwiches. Kinda silly ngl. Wait- what this- your phone is buzzing now? Who? Sebek? Wondering where Waka-sama is? Uh oh.

7/10! It's like going out w a kid whose never been to the outside world- but in a fun way. It would be higher if he told Lilia or Sebek he was tagging along tho... hopefully you don't go deaf from sebek yelling !

# #. LILIA VANROUGE

Did you bring him along? No! Of course not! Should you have noticed he was trailing behind you? Yes! But you didn't because he's an old fae that has experience? Right again! Does that excuse you? No. Obviously not. It's a rule by almost everyone in the dorm. Never bring Lilia grocery shopping. But your dumbass still did.

Well as long as he didn't feed you the food it was fine- right? So you'll let him tag along i guess. Lilia is the type to sit in the cart as you drag him around the store, and he only really gets out when he needs something. You guys probably stop by the spices aisle like 10 times- you feel bad for those in diasomania who are eating that mush. He tells you about the stores in Briar Valley and how he would take silver out when he was but a boy.

It's nice to listen to him as he drops another (that's 15) box of noodles into your hands- again, you feel bad for the people who are going to eat this. You guys probably bulk up on food while there- I mean it's totally not like Lilia has a butt load of money from being an old ass general right? And of course hes not gonna spoil you because your the best right? Yeah of course nottt. Just be careful at the end of your trip. As compensation for taking him with you he might offer to make you something.... and it might be a bit rude to say no....

9/10 ! It's nice listening to him talk- but uhm like many before this- you won't make it through his ...amazing... cooking skills.

# #. SILVER

Silver had spent most of his life living with fae and not many humans. Briar Valley doesnt have many grocery stores- instead being filled with various farmer markets and merchant's. Meaning he'd never been to a grocery store!! So obviously you had to invite him.

Silver is straight up just following you. He's wandering silently like a little cat, trailing from behind. He's looking around with a hint of curiosity. The store was very different from Sam’s- bigger and more luminous. It had a certain vibe to it. He liked it though, it was oddly comforting. Silver usually sticks to himself, but you can tell when something is confusing him. Take the dragon fruit for example, when he saw it a slight chuckle escaped his lips. It looked so different compared to the dragons and longs he’d met before. You couldn't help but laugh yourself- It’s fun watching him experience something new.

Silver is a very reliable man, if you ever need any help he won’t hesitate to jump in. He will help with the cart, the heavy groceries, the water jugs that weigh a mountain load. As you all know- Silver gets tired (and omg he's so pretty thats not fair) and wont hestiate to fall alseep on you if he ever gets tired. So easy solution: just put him in the cart and bury him in food. It’s easier to drag him that way. (instead of him sprawling on top of you)

10/10. Love him. I love HIM. HIIIMMMM. I LOVVVEEEEE HIM. RAAAAAAHHHH-

# #. SEBEK ZIGVOLT

There's no way in wonderland Sebek would ever go with you! He has duties to attend to! He has a beautiful, mystical, enchanting prince to protect!! Malleus was of the upmost importance, why would he ever go with a dumb human like you? You didnt matter compared to his leige-- Lilia is making him accompany you.

At first Sebek will grumble to himself, upset he couldn't stay with the majestic Malleus. Yet he soon remembers (you reminded him) that Lilia was the one to tell him to accompany you. So he immediately assumes this is a type of training for him !! Oh and now he's bragging that he got to join you on this trip instead of Silver- oh boy-

Like others, Sebek will help. Uhm. But like- loudly. As he carries the bags he will ask if you notice how strong and capable he is, a smirk on his face. And then he goes on a rant about Malleus. Whenever you need something you can't reach he will help, with a "human" comment on the tip of his tounge. And then he goes on about Malleus. It's kind of funny though not gonna lie- seeking a giant man boasting while getting groceries of all things. Very fun!

3/10. But a nine in my heart. He's so silly. Anyway. GRAAAHHH- I WANNA PULL HIS HAIR OUT (in a loving way !!)

#twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland x reader #twst x reader #kalim al asim #jamil viper #vil schoenheit #rook hunt #epel felmier #idia shroud #ortho shroud #malleus draconia #lilia vanrouge #silver #sebek zigvolt

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bucknastysbabe · 15 days ago

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Hi! New to your page but OBSESSED with your writing for ✨pookie✨(Criston Cole), you truly produce some magic! Was hoping you might be able to write something post start of war where OC (Alicents Daughter, maybe Aemonds twin) is absolutely miserable. Castle vibes are hell, family just busy and angry and any betrothal in the woodworks for her is now put on the back burner. Thinking Criston has a soft spot for her, and shows the curious maiden how to pleasure herself and keep entertained while they all are busy waging war. (Love me some religious guilt as well so maybe they both refuse to do full on PnV?)

Pretty please 🙏🏼

HELLO POOKIE LOVER!!! I HAVE A SHORT DEPRESSING SWEET AND SMUT FOR ✨YOU✨ I'm so glad you enjoy me works, mwah!!!!! Means sm❤️💋

Rating: Explicit

Tags: Foul Red Keep Energy, Criston’s inability to not be a slut syndrome, religious guilt, religious fanaticism, background alicole, manipulation and rationalization, age gap of modern Day legal standards thank you, frottage, pillow humping, plus sized reader, dirty talk, innocence kink

Taglist: @aemondfairy @elaratyrell @elfven-blog @fairysluna @gil-galadaddy @lovelykhaleesiii @peachysunrize @starogeorgina @samthegreenapologist @towriteloveontheirarms @urmomsgirlfriend1 @zaldritzosrose

WC: ~2k

He can’t fuck her, Criston reminded himself. He can strip himself raw and come all over that pretty pale skin and soft tummy of the little princess. He felt like a sick fuck afterward, the knight was positive he was doomed.

He would stand on guard— brooding whether he was just that fucked in the head or perhaps it was the ‘Dornish’ lust in his blood. Fucking the mother, defiling the maiden. His back was raw and scabbed from the flagellant. Begging and shedding tears on the kneeler as he bloodied his back to purge the sin in his fetid heart.

Yet seeing her whimper and come all over his fingers was a sight— a reprieve in the dismal Keep. The way she’d cling to Criston, crying and squirming on his lap as he massaged and suckled on her lovely tits might be worth his inevitable burning in the lowest layer of the seven hells. She was a sad little thing, fearful since Aegon was put upon the throne, how could he not comfort her?

He was expecting to leave soon, regrettably, Harrenhal and more fire and blood were on the horizon. Criston didn’t taste the ashes and choking miasma of death when he was kissing the lovely little princess. She tasted sweet and innocent, too soft for such circumstances. She had a fierce dragon, and Aemond would call her to arms.

He wanted to take her and run. Alas, he had a duty to live and die by the family he swore himself to. It was the only thing Criston cared for. A win, even if his life was the cost. Then his pretty girl could get married and live alright, with no threat of her head getting lopped or dying by dragon fire.

Criston had her in his lap now as he brooded, eyes scanning over documents he wasn’t meant to understand. He was a warrior, not nearly sharp enough to fill Otto Hightower’s shoes. He exhaled, rubbing the soft velvet of her dress. She was curled up, straddling him, soft blonde hair nestled under his jaw.

“Sweetling?” He rasped.

She mumbled sleepily, “Mhm Ser?”

Criston smiled a little, a faint curve of the corners of his lips. She was so precious to him. His little shadow when he was in the keep. Criston wasn’t complaining, he felt more alone than ever and for some reason, the Gods only knew, the young woman adored the knight.

He slipped his fingers through her platinum hair, hand sliding over to gently grip her chin. She looked like her mother and Aegon— big doe eyes, pouty lips. The princess had those purple eyes, they always tried to peer into him. It escaped Criston how his blackened insides didn’t run her off.

“Are you tired, princess?” He asked.

She shrugged, eyes searching his. Plump lips twitched before she asked if he was restless.

Criston’s hand caressed her soft cheek, lips curling up once again. He murmured, “You keep me restless, sweetling.” She made a soft noise, the sound going straight to Criston’s cock. He needed her, now, preferably before the guilt ate at him too much and he’d send the princess away with a guard.

He stood up, lifting her along with him, lips traveling along the pale column of her neck. The darling dressed like a damn septa, her chemise up to her chin. Criston had already untied it early so he could have access for times like now, pressing lush kisses and playful nips as she whimpered.

“You’re such a good girl, always reading, reciting your prayers,” he rambled, laying her down on his bed. The princess whined, arching into his heavier frame.

“I’m not being bad am I?”

Criston was about to open his mouth, hands pushing up her dress, stopping at her plush thighs. His dark eyes studied her lips as she spoke.

The blonde got on her elbows, achingly innocent, that little furrow between her brows tightening. She spoke softly and quietly as if spilling a secret. The princess murmured, “I- I was rereading the passages in the Seven Pointed Star. As long as my maidenhead is intact, I honor the father and maiden by being pure that I’d be safe. Y-you’re just comforting me, teaching me how to be a good wife, while respecting my maidenhead.”

He stared more.

“Right Ser Criston?”

Cole felt his heart ache worse than any wound physically inflicted. The poor thing was rationalizing and he wasn’t going to challenge it. Criston nodded, stroking her soft curls, his other hand up under the velvet of her green dress, stroking her hip, holding back from gripping the abundant flesh.

He spoke gently to the little lamb, lips ghosting her pout, “Yes, that’s it, in uncertain times like this, I wish to make you feel better. We’ll pass this war and you’ll be a sweet little wife. So good and pious, shush now princess.”

If he heard her speak of the faith again he might cry. So Criston flipped her over, undoing her dress. The thick layers, the kirtle— the Marcher could do it with his eyes closed. The Princess kept her chemise on, a farce, Criston would have it shoved up or unbuttoned.

She shivered as he leaned over her frame, pulling her against his clothed cock. Criston groaned, Gods, she was soft and plush. He nuzzled at the nape of her neck, calloused hands rubbing flared hips, whispering, “How you manage to be a light in this dark keep is a miracle.”

Yet here he was, dimming said light.

She squirmed against his hard cock, panting. Criston would play with her for hours if he could, alas, he didn’t like her to cry. He figured it was time to pose a lesson of sorts. The knight racked his brain, eyes landing on one of those stiff, rounded pillows.

“Sweetling, princess, grab that pillow, you see it don’t you?”

She grabbed it, lavender eyes casting over her shoulder as Criston chuckled nastily. So innocent, his dark heart said. He nosed at her silken shoulder, adjusting her into sitting on the pillow, making sure she was leaning forward a little.

“Criston,” she whined, looking at him again, lips trembling. He loved when the princess got all red, pallid skin blotching. He hummed, almost straddling her from behind, flush to her back and ass.

“This is for when your lord husband might be busy, or you need to relax. Probably good for when you’re with child and…not as spry. When I have to go, you can do this, it’s easy, take it at your pace right now.”

Criston grinned when she whimpered, hips jerking forward. He pressed closer, a hand undoing her chemise further, getting a handful of her ample tit. She moaned, always so sensitive, hips beginning to jerk forward and back. The brunette’s other hand steadied itself on her lower belly, kneading at the layer of flesh.

So fucking soft. Gods, gods, why?

His calloused hand massaged at her breast, the princess whimpering and moving quicker, grinding down onto the pillow, her ass rubbing Criston’s aching cock in the process. He panted against the crook of his shoulder and neck, mouth hanging open. Never did he get so undone without fucking pussy.

Except her.

“Does that feel good Princess?” Criston practically cooed, plucking at a stiff nipple, the Princess gasping wetly, her eyes shut tight. She reached back, one of her trembling hands lacing over Criston’s, mewling for him.

He bit at her neck, lapping after, the sweet gesture of their interlaced fingers sending his possessive streak into overdrive. Criston growled under his breath, rutting now, driving the blonde to move in jerks, biting at her full lips to keep from squealing.

“That’s it, sweetling, keep it up, make yourself feel good,” he rasped, licking and nipping up a racing pulse. She shivered from head to toe, head leaning back onto the knight’s shoulder as she huffed and whined, fucking against the pillow, angling herself to grind against her clit.

“Close, m’close Criston, please,” came her needy pleading, eyes hazy with pleasure as Criston marked her neck up, squeezing her hand as a lifeline. His hips stuttered as he coaxed his baby, no- the princess along.

He rested his cheek against hers, using his hips to guide her along at a breakneck pace. Criston groaned lowly, rasping, “Here we go, can’t sit and grind on your pretty petals for hours, you’ll get too sensitive, y-you’ve got to push it, like this, yeah sweetness, fuck, fuck!”

Criston trailed off as his cock twitched in his breeches, full and swollen and ready to pop. He had half a mind to just take her right there and then. Yet her cries of ecstasy and mewling paralyzed Criston’s dark thoughts.

He’d do this every night, any time, anywhere to get another sick thrill.

“Yes! Yes! Like this- oh g- gods, Ser! Mm, I'm close Ser,” she cried out, a ragdoll for Criston’s delights now. The princess turned to kiss him, a rare gesture, plush lips smacking against his fervently as they grunted and rutted in a frenzy. The Marcher gasped into her wet mouth, feeling like a dog drooling over meat.

Criston needed her to come first, suckling on her fat bottom lip, pressing harder, mumbling desperately sweet things he wouldn’t remember. He begged, “Yes sweetling, I can feel you, let go for me, come on, I'm with you darling, my precious girl.”

It was a muffled shriek and Criston’s pitchy cry as they messily kissed, rutting like animals, the princess spurring Criston on into emptying into his pants with ragged breaths, cursing and shivering. She fared no better, coming apart as pretty as she always did, making sure Criston could almost feel it.

They kissed through the aftershocks, lips all swollen and wet, Criston pulling her atop his body as he laid back onto the bed, lazily stroking the maiden’s back. She was quiet for a moment longer, basking, cheeks adorably flushed. She nuzzled his jaw and cheek like a kitten, sleepily mumbling, “Don’t make me leave yet, please Ser Criston? That was…a lesson…I don't want to be alone.”

He kissed her forehead, muttering some nonsense about giving her some time. Criston couldn't say no. It was more time to spend in fantasy. He could feel that small iron altar of the seven-pointed star awaiting him anyway. What was a few hours more in sin?

“I won’t leave you, my dear,” he lied.

#hotd smut #hotd fanfic #ser criston cole x reader #criston cole x reader #criston cole x you #criston cole imagine #ask answered

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fairlyang · 10 months ago

Text

Let you break my heart again II🕷️

will your friendship be strong enough or will it be easy to crack through?

w/c: 2.9K

pairing: miguel o’hara x f!reader

tags: angst, more heartbreak, no more playboy, typical girl best friend problems, crazy gf, cheating allegations, betrayal, heartbreak, the end

notes: I dragged a lil ass I wanted it done the next day but writer brain </3 FINAL PART !!!!! (My original idea was for mig to only admit his feelings to reader after she got gwen stacy’ed)

part one

Months had passed and this girlfriend actually stuck around. He didn’t get rid of her and he somehow didn’t grow bored of her like he had with the others.

The worst part had to be when they made the three month point and he decided it was finally time for her to meet you.

That day your nerves had grown and you weren’t so sure you’d be able to do it. To pull through and not just burst out crying when you watch as he looks at her with pure love in his eyes.

It looked like his playboy days were over and he was finally ready for a solid relationship.

You barely made it through the night and if it weren’t for Peter’s hugs and MJ’s comforting words when Dana went to touch up her makeup and Miguel went to go change clothes, you would’ve been an absolute goner.

It was getting late and Peter offered to take you home to which you immediately accepted. Miguel then offered to take you after dropping Dana off but you politely declined.

Especially after seeing how wide her eyes got and she was (not so) subtly glaring at you.

Usually girlfriends would hate the girl best friend just because they’re a girl, but in this case Dana is a smart girl, and she had an instant inkling of your feelings towards him.

Even though you’ve remained respectful like you always have been when meeting his girlfriends, she didn’t like that Miguel had a girl best friend.

She kept her mouth shut and pretended she was fine but slowly piecing things together in her head.

So after saying your goodbyes and leaving Miguel’s apartment it didn’t take long for you to break down in the backseat of Peter’s car with an empathetic MJ trying to console you.

It only grew more difficult to hide your true feelings. Especially because Miguel would now bring Dana to group hangouts. Which makes some sense, even though Peter and MJ were just friends when you met them, then grew feelings for one another.

Alas you had no choice but to suck it up.

Three more months passed by and your love for him never faded. He didn’t even treat you that differently either which did end up causing some trouble for him from Dana. She apparently didn’t like how close you guys were, even if you did know each other since you were 14.

She claimed she should be his only best friend and what else could he really ask for.

He told her that you’d always be his best friend and he wasn’t going to toss you out just because she wants to be his only best friend. He can have multiple best friends.

How could he throw away an 8 year long friendship?

He then called her crazy for thinking she can control who he’s friends with.

So she recalled his words right back to him when she randomly ended up befriending his younger half-brother, Gabriel, merrily weeks after that argument.

Miguel wouldn’t ever tell you the specifics of the argument, mainly because in a sense he wanted to protect you. He didn’t want you to feel bad that his girlfriend didn’t like you, (as if you didn’t already know) and that she wanted him to drop you.

So when hanging out just as a pair he’d only tell you he was frustrated with her. He told you that she had befriended Gabriel and you only saw red flags but kept quiet.

You tried to remain cautious of what you’d say when he’d come to you about relationship problems. Obviously deep down you want to tell him to break up with her because she’s toxic and controlling but it wasn’t the best idea as the supposed girl best friend that “isn’t” in love with her best friend.

So you told him to maybe spend less time with you, mostly because you genuinely couldn’t think of an actual suitable solution.

But it didn’t matter because ultimately he denied that idea quickly and looked deeply in your eyes promising you, “you’ll always be my best friend. Nothing’s going to change that.”

If only he knew and kept to his promise.

It was now two months after that conversation was had and a whirlwind of actions, words, and lies would turn everything around.

You went to eat some lunch at a cafe outside of campus when your phone died on the way back. You were fine without relying on your phone and just thought you’d charge it during your next lecture on your laptop.

As you finally hit campus and walked past different students sitting around the grass and benches, your eyes focused on a familiar head with its brown bob.

You sigh and felt your heart ache as you walked past Dana eating Miguel’s face out in public like that.

Until you took a double take and dread hit you after realizing it wasn’t Miguel she was making out with. It was fucking Gabriel.

You couldn’t believe she was just openly cheating on Miguel like it was nothing.

You stood a couple feet from them and you couldn’t believe this was real. You blinked, rubbed your eyes, and blinked again but sure enough it was the younger O’Hara brother with a red scarf and those goofy ass (but recognizable) goggles.

You gulped and took your phone out only for the screen to show that it was dead.

You mentally panicked and were afraid they’d catch you so you quickly ran inside and immediately headed straight to your lecture hall.

The klutz in you unfortunately never went away so you nearly fell as soon as you accidentally hit a body after making a turn.

Horror filled your eyes and body as Miguel held onto your shoulders, trying to see what was wrong.

Your eyes were wide and your heart was racing wildly, you couldn’t possibly do this right now.

“I- M-Mig- uh- ‘m l-late for c-chem- sorry!” You stuttered and pushed past him to get to class and manage your thoughts properly.

As soon as you made it and sat at your unassigned assigned seat that happened to be next to MJ, who was worried to see you so stunned, held your hand and tried to get you to be calm because you looked so distressed.

You hadn’t even realized your hands and legs were shaking. How could they not be?

You just witnessed the most brutal betrayal of all time and there was no concrete evidence whatsoever.

Your first instant thought was that Miguel wouldn’t believe you.

He was full on in love with Dana now, in what world would he believe the love of his love would be cheating on him?

Not only cheating on him but cheating on him with his brother?!?

MJ’s mouth was moving but you couldn’t hear a word, you couldn’t even read her lips. All your brain was set on was how of fucking course it had to be you who caught Dana’s ass cheating.

How fast she’d turn it onto you would be so insane. Disgusting even.

What if she exposed your feelings towards him?

What if she could convince him you’re lying?

All you could do is pray he’d believe his ole reliable best friend over a girl he’s been with for 6 months and his brother he never really got along with.

MJ was eventually able to catch your attention but it took the entire lesson for her to get a peep out of you. And that peep only happen to be a sad whisper of Miguel’s name.

As your phone finally charged your first instinct was to text Miguel, quickly typing the words, “need to see you, my place after class?”

He quickly responded with a simple, “sounds good.” Then followed by a, “should I be worried?” Which you had no response to.

You quietly told MJ the unfortunate news to which she nearly gasped out loud. Her eyes were wide and she finally understood why you were so freaked out.

The lecture had finally ended and you collected all your things while MJ was quietly asking you questions to which you quietly answered.

Following your tail as you left the lecture hall and off to find Peter to quickly fill him in, and to help with your nerves because you didn’t even know how to start off that conversation with Miguel.

They were both giving you suggestions on how to break it down gently to him while Peter drove you back to your place.

You could feel the anxiety building in your stomach and it felt so scary not knowing how he’ll react.

And it overall felt even worse that you couldn’t take a video or a picture. This was practically a test to see if he’d trust you enough to tell him the truth or just make up a lie.

You could only pray that he’d believe your words over hers but you couldn’t even begin to prepare yourself in case he didn’t.

How could he not believe you? Even if you’ve been desperately in love with him you’d never do anything to purposely destroy any of his relationships.

You were just too kind-hearted to ever even think about doing that.

Would he really have it in him to not trust your words anymore?

Will he believe her words over yours?

Will this lifelong friendship finally come to its end like Dana has been wanting from the very beginning?

Finally you had arrived at your apartment and you still felt uneasy. Miguel’s car wasn’t in sight until you heard the revving of his car and that’s when things started to get real.

They gave you their final words of encouragement before you got out and climbed up the steps to wait for him.

He parked behind Peter and as he got out you could slightly hear him ask if they were gonna come in to which they obviously said no.

He shrugged and walked over to you as you unlocked the first door before stepping in and walking to the left door that lead up to your apartment.

“Hey are you okay? You seemed shaken up earlier.” He said, walking in and shutting the first door behind him.

You walked in and stepped aside to let him go in then shut the door behind him. The anxiety returned and you weren’t so sure how to start it all off once you turned around to look at him.

Your heart ached and although you might’ve been filled with jealousy for months on end, you would never pray he would get hurt this way.

You always wanted happiness for him, even if it wasn’t with you.

And now that he had it, you had to break his heart.

How could you possibly let him down gently?

You felt your hands beginning to sweat and your legs started shaking again which he instantly noticed and grabbed you, carefully leading you to the couch.

He sat you down and sat right next to you, gently holding your hands, wondering what could possibly have given you such a drastic reaction.

You desperately tried to calm yourself but it was to no use. Your body was panicking inside and out, giving away that this was something serious.

You still didn’t know how to even start.

So you just blurted it out.

“Dana cheated on you.”

Silence filled the room.

You could’ve sworn he could hear your heart pounding out of your chest. He was frozen and immediate tears formed in his eyes.

This was so fucked up.

In all these years of being his shoulder to cry on, you were petrified that it would come to an end. In a way you kind of always relied on him being there no matter what.

This whole situation could make or break that.

“I saw Dana making out with Gabriel on campus…” you whispered before adding, “I’m so sorry.”

You had never felt so nervous in your life. You moved one hand from his and held his while he stared down at the floor.

You were subconsciously tapping your foot on the ground because the anxiety had just taken control and the silence was already killing you.

You couldn’t help but feel sympathetic, he truly has never been so happy, and now it’s just gone.

You looked at his face and as soon as you did, his tears started pouring out. One hot tear fell after another and you grabbed him, him embracing you as he cried into your shoulder.

You felt sick to your stomach, it felt like the most unfortunate thing to ever have happened to you.

Having to tell the love of your life that his girlfriend cheated on him.

Having to see how heartbroken he was.

Nothing would’ve prepared you for his reaction.

The quiet sobs and light shaking.

The way his hands were trembling while holding on to you.

You just hugged him as tightly as you could and gently rubbed his back to try to soothe him. Maybe it was past trauma that suddenly hit him, that he started to sob a little louder.

Your heart was practically breaking right with his. You felt downright horrible and weren’t sure how you could possibly help him. Only thing you could do was be with him, and you’d be with him for as long as he needed.

And you were.

Like the absolute best friend, of course you were.

The day after you explained in full, what you witnessed and he stayed at your place for a solid week before he decided to talk to Dana and listen to what she had to say. You offered to go with him but he said it was best you stayed, though he did really want your support but didn’t think it would be appropriate.

It was midday on a Friday when he had the call and he didn’t come back that night.

Or the next.

Or after that.

You had no fucking clue what was said and neither did Peter nor MJ.

Monday morning your mind kept thinking worst case scenarios which had you feeling uneasy as you were walking on campus to your first lecture.

Suddenly you stopped with Peter and MJ following suit at the sight in front of you. Miguel’s arms wrapped around Dana’s with Gabriel standing in front of them laughing at something.

That was the moment you felt your heart shatter into pieces at the realization of what happened.

Your words weren’t enough.

And in his emotional state and her false sweet voice she definitely used, of course he fell for whatever lying words she told him.

Her manipulative and crazy ass didn’t help from the pain this brought you.

He was your best friend.

Falling hopelessly and desperately in love with someone who was once a shy little nerd that would be there everyday for you, to now a man who doubted his best friend’s word for a girl he knew for less than a year.

8 years.

8 years you had known each other and not once ever lied to one another.

All of a sudden in his mind it makes sure that you lied about something as graphic as this.

All of a sudden he believes her words over your own.

Absolutely nothing could’ve prepared you for the way your heart ached and all you felt was hopelessness.

When Gabriel slightly moved, Miguel was now in clear view of you three, more specifically you.

The most vicious glare was all he was giving you meanwhile Dana only had a mischievous smirk on her face which gave you all the confirmation you needed.

Peter shook his head in disgust while MJ grabbed you, making you walk in the direction of your lecture while Peter walked behind you both before stepping up to him and muttering, “The truth will hit you hard one day.”

And boy did it.

Three months after that Miguel was going back to his place to cook a romantic dinner only to catch Gabriel giving Dana backshots on the kitchen counter.

Immediate regret hit him and he realized you were indeed telling him the truth.

He realized Dana’s bold lie that you were the liar, and made that stuff up about her was because you wanted to steal him from her, was indeed not real. That you weren’t deeply in love with him and needed to fabricate the perfect lie to finally steal him.

But before they both left (half dressed), Dana had to let him know that he was the easiest to manipulate out of all her exes. Then that the reality was that you were in love with him, the only lie being just that you didn’t plan anything.

She just hated girl best friends but also wasn’t in the mood for something so serious. She wanted a cop out. A way out.

So she figured you were the easiest target and making up that his other two friends, who she also didn’t like, were also in on it, was the best way to go about it.

The only reason she came back to Miguel was because she grew bored of Gabriel and wanted him back.

And he fell right into her trap.

And there was no way to fix or mend what he so badly broke.

It was far too late.

But at last, you’d never let him break your heart again.

#miguel ohara #miguel ohara imagine #across the spiderverse #miguel o hara #miguel ohara x reader #atsv miguel #miguel ohara oneshot #miguel ohara x y/n #miguel o'hara #Miguel ohara angst #spiderman 2099 #Miguel O’Hara angst

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deathblacksmoke · 1 year ago

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the crazier i came

pairing: nick folio x fem reader

cw: first time anal sex and a VERY needy (unhinged and impatient and uncareful) folio

taglist: @concretenoah / @ladyveronikawrites / @lma1986 / @monotoniscreaming / @xxrainstorm

if you want to be tagged in future fics, let me know :)

author’s note: this one i’m actually very nervous about posting. i’ve been going back and forth with myself for weeks on whether i was actually going to write it at all. alas, here she is. hope y’all enjoy 🤍

title from “cherry waves” by deftones.

**************************************************************

He can’t keep still.

He’s squirming impatiently, grip tightening, loosening, tightening on your hips. You can feel his cock twitching inside of you. It’s just on the wrong side of feeling okay.

You need him to stay still. It’s all too distracting for you to focus on adjusting to him inside of you. There’s lube everywhere—your hips, your ass, sliding down your inner thighs, Nick’s hands and yours, the bedsheets. Nick is rutting and squirming behind you and it almost feels good, save for the twinge of pain when he moves wrong. If only he would be fucking patient.

“Nick, you’ve got to stop moving.” You tell him through a whine. It’s frustrating, and you hate having to tell him no, but you know you’ll both enjoy this more if he would just stay still for a little while longer. You’re almost there. “Stay still for me a little longer, please.”

“I’m trying to be good.” He gasps, and it makes you feel soft for him. He ruts into you once, twice, and it hurts, making you wince. He groans and stills, rubs his hands soothingly over your hips in an apology. You forgive him. You always do. You know Nick, never the careful type, but never malicious. Always apologetic. You knew you would have to fight him a little. “I’m sorry, honey, you just feel so good.”

He sounds desperate, like he might be ready to cry. The pet name makes your skin heat, words rolling off his tongue like he’s pained. At least, for once, he’s still.

You focus on adjusting to him. Deep breath in, out. You squeeze around him, hoping it’ll help, and it does a little. The tiny shocked gasp he gives you helps too, making you laugh at him, and he groans like he’s embarrassed. But he doesn’t move. Good fucking boy.

You feel so full of him. Your fingers are grasping at the bed sheets and letting go. You’re overwhelmed, struggling to keep your breathing steady. Deep breath in, out. Experimentally, you roll your hips back into him. The edge of pain is gone—it’s an overwhelming fullness, but you manage it. You pull forward, rolling your hips back again, slower this time.

You hear Nick groan above you, so ragged that his voice breaks. You clench around him, suddenly a little desperate yourself. His fingers grip your hips harder and you look over your shoulder to meet his eyes. They’re brimming with tears and your breath catches. You’ve always loved seeing him like this.

You decide it’s time to let him have his treat.

You nod, giving him permission, and watch as relief washes over his face. He gathers you up into his arms so your back is flush with his chest and the change in angle has your vision blurring. He’s fucking into you slow, every push inside making you feel short of breath again. His arm is wrapped tight around your tummy, the other hand holding your throat—not gripping, just resting there. You think maybe it’s a comfort to you both. His thighs shake as he’s gasping into your neck.

You can tell he’s still trying to be patient for you.

“Nicky, you can go harder.” You whine before the breath is knocked out of you as he pulls out of you and slams back in. It consumes you and your vision goes black. You close your eyes, leaning your head back onto his shoulder and putting your trust in him completely, letting yourself feel it all as he fucks you with shallow thrusts.

He buries his face in your neck, gasping, licking, biting at the sensitive skin.

His hands are gripping your hip and your tummy so hard that you know you’ll bruise. You can feel where you’ll be covered in fingerprint shaped hues of blues and purples and yellows. You can already feel Nick pressing his fingers into each of his marks, watching you wince and grinning, soothing you with kisses.

“You’re shaking.” He says, gripping you tighter, holding you up better, pulling you ever closer so you’re touching everywhere. You want to say no shit. You’ll be trembling for days after this. He places soft kisses along your jaw, your neck, your shoulder. The gentleness juxtaposes with his harsh thrusts, how thoroughly he’s fucking you. You’re sure that without his arms, you’d collapse into the mattress. “Are you feeling good, honey?”

You want to say yes. You want to say of course. You want to say please. All you can muster is a frantic nod and a wail of something resembling his name when his hand moves from its spot on your hip, between your folds, fingers pressing into your clit.

You place your hand over his, holding it there, grinding yourself down on his fingers and back into his cock. It overwhelms you. You take what he gives you. You take what is owed to you. You lose yourself in the feeling, burning everywhere he touches you, pressing his hand into you and letting him do the hard work.

Every thrust moves his fingers along your center and the pressure on your clit gets you closer and closer. You feel his rhythm faltering as he nears his own end and you’re determined to get there first. Your thighs are trembling as your orgasm bubbles up in you, your skin buzzing with it.

You collapse as it hits you, crying out Nick’s name and going limp in his arms, twitching with the aftershocks of your own pleasure. He lets you fall forward and drapes himself over your back, thrusting into you frantically. Your focus is gone, vision blurred, skin burning, ears ringing. You can barely register him inside you anymore but you feel protected and sated with his weight along your back.

When he pulls out of you and straightens up, you collapse into the mattress and miss the feeling of his skin on yours, everywhere he had been touching you. You sigh happily when you feel his cum painting the skin of your lower back.

A kiss is pressed between your shoulder blades before his weight leaves the bed. You let your eyes close, knowing he’ll be back to take care of you.

It’s moments later when he returns, running a soft and dampened towel along your back and between your legs before tossing it away, gathering you up in his arms and pulling a blanket over you both.

“Feeling okay?” He asks, fingering through your hair.

“You’ll have to behave a lot better than that if we do this again.” You say, pressing a kiss to his chest and laughing so he knows you’re okay.

“All right, honey.” He says, holding you closer. “Whatever you want.”

#bad omens fic #bad omens fanfiction #bad omens rpf #bad omens smut #nick folio fic #nick folio fanfiction #nick folio rpf #nick folio smut #nick folio x reader #deathblacksmoke works

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wyyvernn · 10 months ago

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A/n: Something small I wrote for myself but then I got carried away and wrote it longer :)

✧･ﾟ: Masterlist :･ﾟ✧

Cw: All characters 18+, Older Man/Younger Woman, Mentor/Student Dynamic, Smut, Thigh riding, Overstimulation, Fingering - don't like, don't read

Tags: @psybrepunk @sangheilihoes @demigoddessqueens @bookworm-with-coffee @ladysaturnsdust @haytham-loves-chocolate @memoriesofafallen

Usually, there was little that filled the silence of the Grand Master's office. The soft flipping through papers and maps, and the occasional scratching of a quill occured here and there. Haytham planned out the rest of his night to be a peaceful one, occupied by unfinished letters, and paragraphs to be written in his journal about his recent involvements in the Order.

But of course, those plans were thwarted and the peace chased away by his pupil invading his privacy again.

Your cries of pleasure echoed in his office, bringing him back from his thoughts. He watched you grind yourself back and forth on his thigh, your skirts bunched up in your fists, eyes squeezed shut and those smooth lips of yours parted, occasionally licked wet by your tongue. His hand came up and tucked some of your loose hair behind your ear, the other one curled around your hip, keeping you firmly put on his lap.

“Needy little thing…” He muttered quietly, his voice low and husky. The way he seemed so nonchalant about the situation frustrated you a little.

You were making quite a sticky mess of his pants, and he felt your slick seeping through, soiling the material with a large patch of wetness. It amused him - the disorderly and unruly sight of you was a strong contrast to the perfect image of him. Unlike you, there wasn't a single grey strand out of place from his neat ponytail, nor were his clothes unkempt, his body still donning his usual navy blue fit. You guessed that if you hadn't interrupted him when you had, he would've been packing up for the night and heading to sleep but alas here you both were.

A sigh exhaled through him, like your unfulfilled desires were a minor inconvenience to his night.

“Have you no shame? Do you take pleasure in robbing me of my late night hours? Of the only time I am free to indulge in?” He scolds, adopting a slight frown, but you can tell that he's not really angry. Something about his expression tells you that he's only playing along.

“Mhn… sorry, sir.” You murmur with guilt painting your face, repeatedly dragging your wet slit back and forth, gasping when your clit scrapes against the rough material of his trousers.

“No, you're not.” He says, hisses, his breath beginning to grow ragged and uneven when he grabs your hips, a noticeable bulge forming and rubbing against your leg. Large, calloused hands dig into your skin and force you to grind harder on his thigh, resulting in a particularly sharp cry from your throat.

“You're not sorry.” He grits out, his words harsh in your ear, and he yanks your lower body towards him again, eliciting another whine. “You wouldn't be grinding yourself on my thigh for relief like a common whore if you were now, would you?”

You continue to fill the office with your lewd sounds, too stuck in the euphoria that his leg provides you. No doubt whoever has walked past on the other side of the door has heard your moaning, either stopping to listen or rushing away with a bright face.

A slap to your rump refocuses your attention back to him when you don't offer an answer.

“Would you?”

You babble out something incoherent, another apology or something that you don't care to remember, only focused on how good it feels, how good his hands feel as they push and pull your hips yet painful when it becomes too stimulating.

“Slow down, sir… please.” You moan out, digging your heels into the floor and tightening your hands on his shoulders in an attempt to stop yourself but his grip is relentless, the pace he sets for you even more so.

A flash of determination burns in his eyes briefly when you try to stop him. “Oh no, you wanted this. And I'll see to it that you finish it to the end.”

Suddenly he's pushing aside your skirts and seeking out your swollen nub. The moment he dips his thick fingers past your folds, you bite into your bottom lip and bury your face in his neck, muffling your groans.

He twists the pair of them deeper while you writhe in his lap and then claw your hands at his back when they curl against your walls, the rough pad of his thumb dragging along your clit and bringing you closer and closer to your release.

“Please, sir… please!” You beg, trying to catch your breath but your Grand Master is unforgiving, still watching you with that almost bored expression as he plays with you.

With one last cry into his shoulder, Haytham thrusts his fingers impossibly quick and finally stops when you spill all over them. He lifts them up to your mouth and pops both in, slathering your slick on your tongue, a silent command to taste yourself.

You don't disappoint him, taking his forearm in both of your hands and wrapping your lips around his digits, making sure to suck them clean.

He watches you with a flicker of lust, his cock still hard and straining in trousers, and he pulls his fingers away abruptly from your mouth with a wet pop before he can make you do something about his evident predicament. He'll deal with it later.

Haytham gently shoos you off his lap, much to your disappointment.

“Run along now and clean yourself up. I expect you to be ready in the morning for training. And don't interrupt me at this hour again.” He warns, although there's a light mischief to his eyes, one that almost dares you to try it again.

And of course you do, the following night.

#haytham kenway #haytham kenway x reader #assassin's creed iii #assassin's creed 3 #smut

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08melancholie · 2 months ago

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Untouched. — Micah/Reader

tags: Loss of Innocence, Loss of Virginity, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Gentle Sex, Mild Hurt/Comfort, always have to include some angst sorry guys, Porn with Feelings, Angst and Porn, Emotional Porn, Blood, Porn with minimal Plot, Angst with a Happy Ending, Guilt, Emotional, Emotional Hurt, Vaginal Sex, Cunnilingus, Vaginal Fingering, Aftercare, Female Honorifics/Terms, Not Beta Read, no beta we die like Micah Bell, Established Relationship

summary: Virginity and sex have been a pretty taboo topic between you and your lover, Micah. You've been together a long time now and he's started initiating intimacy almost every night. But you were too scared, of the way the other girls described losing their innocences. So you turned it down every time. Finally, after realising how unfair you were being to Micah, you cave in, one fortunate night—surely, Micah will take care of you? It probably would have been smart to ask if the two of you both lost your virginities, first.

a/n: another micah fic to heal my unresolved trauma.. mmmmm yes. do u guys like your h/c with your smut or am i alone on this..

warnings: loss of virginity

words: 3,514 | AO3 LINK

You always heard that it hurt, stung and bled a lot. It made you afraid, that much was sure. What made it worse was how much Micah wanted it—he hinted at it every night when in bed with you. So many nights in which he'd do everything he needed to, hoping that you'd finally give in and finally sleep with him. But no; every night, you chickened out. All of the other girls had told their experiences, most of them sounding absolutely terrifying—some of them saying they were crying, even. It was horrific, and it scared you away from ever even wanting to lose your virginity.

But your lover never seemed to complain. Micah was quite understanding, even if he was unaware you were still untouched.

Another night approaches the two of you, hidden away from everyone inside Micah's tent. You're both already in your sleepwear, your back pressed to Micah's chest with his arm lazily slung around your abdomen. His face is buried into the crook of your neck, the exact space where the shoulder ends and extends to the neck. His breaths are slow and calm, but the energy feels weird. His actions feel a little reluctant, which you learned was usually an implication that he wants to ask something. So, you gently took his hand and squeezed to get his attention.

"Hm.?" He glanced at you from over your shoulder, groggily humming while fluttering his eyes open to see you in the dimly lit tent.

You slowly turned yourself around, wanting to look him in the eyes while you talked of this. "Something on your mind?" You feel his arm, on your back now that you turned over, tighten slightly—meaning you were right.

Micah was quiet for a moment, contemplating his answer while his hand went from lazily hanging into your body to holding it more firmly. "Just.. 'bout us." He mumbles his answer, partially scared to even bring this up. "I know.. you always say no to it. But, I would really like to show you.. my love in every way I can." His palm slowly moves around your lower back, caressing it through your thin nightwear in a circular motion.

You dreaded just talking about it, all your fear coming right back to you. You didn't want blood, tears, stinging and hurt. You didn't want that, not with your lover. "I know..." Your fear always got in the way before, that feeling of agony whenever this and any similar topic were brought up in conversation. Being the only person in camp still with your virginity, the girls who knew teased you relentlessly—don't even get started on the men. Alas, tonight felt a little different; you felt for Micah. He's been begging you for... months. It's all he's wanted from you for endless weeks, and he's been doing anything and everything to get you to agree. Micah has been so good to you, and yet you turn him down every time. It was pity you felt now, more than fear. And so, you prepare yourself to either make the best or the worst decision of your life. "I think.. tonight wouldn't be so bad." And there it is, finally out of your mouth.

You see Micah's darkened face lift to you, barely able to see you, but he's unmoving and just staring ahead at your face. After a moment, you hear him briefly and quietly chuckle. "Attagirl! I knew you'd come around, baby!" He's excited, like a child getting their favourite toy from the store, which makes this worth it no matter the experience. His arm tightens around you and he wastes no time scooting closer, giving you many reassuring and rewarding kisses and pecks on the lips, which you all return. His hand on your lower back is still massaging your back, but is now traveling lower, hovering over your rear. He brings his other hand into play, placing it on the back of your head and gently grabbing you by the hair, starting to deepen the kiss. At least you knew how to make out with him, thank God.

His hand finally reached your backside, and he gave it an experimental knead to hear your reaction—loving how you squeaked into his mouth at the sudden contact. So, he continued to massage your ass while deepening the kiss, his tongue finding itself exploring your mouth, not one singular crevice left untouched by your lover. You could feel yourself getting more hot, gradually. It was really happening. You had that same fear in the back of your head still, but it was overpowered by the lust slowly creeping up your body and down between your legs. "Let's do this right, hm?" Micah parts from your mouth and stops kneading at you, patting your rear before standing off the cot to light a lantern. He wanted to see you while he finally had you. "Lay on yer back for me, sweet thin'."

You do as he says—he's definitely the expert here—and shift from your side to your back, watching as he starts stripping off his shirt. The grey undershirt finds itself on the floor, and he gets back to the bed, this time climbing over you. It's a sight, seriously.

"Liking what you're finally seein', eh babydoll?" He lets out a brief chuckle before leaning back down to continue making out, one hand on your cheek and the other on your knee. His fingers are tinging, practically desperate to touch you, and it just sends more heat to your core and dampness to your underwear. He starts to slowly move his hand down, devilishly slowly. Your hands wrapped around his neck to pull him closer, and he started gently biting your lip. His hand slowly moved lower, soon enough finding itself on your inner thigh just under your chemise. "Let's see," he brushes over your clothed sex, finding you wet already and making you sigh into his mouth. It boosts his ego and he can't stop a small exhaled laugh leaving him. "damn, lookat'chu. Already so wet fer me?" He drawls, pulling away from your mouth to give you a breather. He fiddles with the hem of your undergarments, just barely sliding his fingers under it. "How about we get this off next?"

Your panties get tossed onto his shirt, and you feel very nude despite the chemise covering you perfectly fine. He's rightfully impatient to have you, and immediately swipes a finger through your folds to slick his finger up, the other hand fumbling with his jean zipper and button. It's happening. His slicked-up finger pressed to your entrance, slowly pushing itself inside as you mewled underneath him, just turning him more on with how responsive you were. "There we go," he pulls his jeans down while slowly entering and leaving your walls, fucking you with one finger. It's pure bliss; you're gasping at every thrust and curl of his finger, despite knowing what's coming every time. Then, he adds another digit. You moan, pleasure mixes with a small stinging, but it's soon drowned out by pleasure as Micah uses two fingers on your cunt, and starts rubbing circles into your nub with his thumb. "Shit, girl, you're tight." He comments, feeling how you clench around his digits and how hard it is to ease them in. He curls and scissors them inside you, more of your moans filling the tent. You look down at him as he slowly pulls his coated fingers out, seeing him kick his jeans off and pull his drawers down. It's actually happening.

He's fully nude now, crawling to your knees and beckoning you to sit up. You comply and he grabs the hem of your chemise, quickly removing it off your now bare body and throwing it to the other discarded clothing of yours. Both of you, nude as the day you were born. "You don't even know how purty 'ya are," He shimmies back onto the bed, looking down at you for a moment. "turn around, on your hands and knees." The command feeds into the fire in your abdomen, feeling butterflies practically attacking it. You roll over in compliance, lifting you hips up. You hear the cot creak quietly before his hands find your hips. It's finally happening. You cling to the pillow that the lower half of your face is buried into, grabbing fistfuls of the plush material to brace yourself. Good that you did. Micah—still unaware—doesn't even try to wait, and with no warm-up thrusts, he lines himself up.

The way the pillow muffles out the sound that escapes you, a pained and squeaky yelp, makes Micah unaware of the fact you're hurting. He's pushing himself in further, and you're gripping onto the pillow for dear life. The other girls were right—it burns, stings and you can't even move your body in protest. "Damn, girl.. still so tight?" Micah murmurs, but something just feels odd—even more so when he feels you start shaking. Tears have begun seeping out of your eyes, like the girls said they might. The pillow is absorbing every little drop, but it's your body that betrays you as you start shaking, and it all goes to shit. "Hey—honey, 'ya good.?" Micah leans over your back slightly, and seeing as he gets no response other than a muffled sob, he withdraws himself out of you, earning another yelp from you. And, that's when he sees it.

His tip is red, covered in both your slick and blood. He feels his body stiffen as he looks down at it, then at your bleeding sex. He's not a fool or an idiot; he knows exactly what it all means. "Jesus fucking Christ.." Micah instantly gets off of the cot, picking his jeans and undergarments off the floor. He doesn't even bother to wipe his shaft—now soft, from the realisation of the horrific situation he's put you in—before he tucks himself away, just staring at your weeping form as you shake. It takes him a moment to break out of it, but he's instantly coming over to comfort you as he does. "My God, I am.. so sorry, my sweet girl." He coos, walking to your side of the bed and gently rubbing your head, his palm caressing you as his fingers tangle in your hair. "I am a moron.. I never noticed or.. even asked—God, babydoll..." He curses himself mentally, the sounds of your crying fogging his brain completely.

You slowly sit up on the cot, with slight issue, wiping your face dry. "No.. I should have told you—it's why I never.." Micah nods and cuts you off with a "I know" as he extends his arms, his stomach churning at the sight of you like this. You don't need another word from him before you crawl over and fall into his arms, emotions higher than usual. Your tears overtake you again, and you're weeping into his shoulder while hugging him impossibly close. And so, It happened.

You always imagined your first time would be this.. fairy-tale moment you read about in books, but it was so much worse. Micah is cooing quiet reassurances into your ear, and you're crying into his shoulder as you're still bleeding down under. This, it was the opposite of what you read about—it was so much worse. "I'm sorry.. I ruined this for us." You mumbled against his skin, your words barely coherent.

"No—No, don't even say that." Micah practically scolds you, not even wanting to hear about any of that. "You didn't do anything, 'ya hear? I should have known.. or at least asked." He huffs and brings his head into your hair, sighing shakily against it. "So sorry, babygirl. I would have been.. so much gentler, if I knew." His voice is quiet and soft—highly uncharacteristic, but you like it, in a way. You just hug tighter to him, feeling a drop of your blood ooze down your thigh.

Once you two finally compose each other, Micah makes you take a seat on the cot. "I'm gonna take care of 'ya, doll. That okay?" You nod before he walks over to another corner of the tent, getting out a clean rag he keeps about before returning. He kneels before you, placing his free hand on your thigh. "Spread them," he can barely look when you comply to his command, seeing the blood again. He pushed his own feelings aside—you're doing much worse than he is—and gently parts your thighs some more before bringing the rag to your bloody mound, very carefully wiping you clean. You gasp a few times as the rough rag brushes over you, but bite your lip to keep quiet. Once he's done with you, he kisses your inner thigh and murmurs another apology before standing and turning away from you, unzipping himself free and wipe off what was on his shaft from before.

You're looking up at the back of his head; you feel guilty, terrifying him this way after you finally gave in to the one thing he was missing from you. "Micah.." He tosses the rag and hides himself back into his jeans, turning around to the sound of your voice addressing him. "I.. I don't want this to end."

Micah creases a brow at your statement, a tad confused. "Baby, we won't do anything you—" "I want to, Micah You cut him off, wanting him to understand, so badly. "You said you could.. be more gentle, right.?" Micah silently nodded, ready to hear you out. You look up into his eyes—guilt-ridden like your own, somber and hurt. Finally, after a long pause of melancholic eye-contact, you speak. "Can you show me?"

Silence fills the tent, and Micah can't find it in him to respond right away. He stares down at you sitting there, face ridden with dried tears and your body still nude. Even after he's hurt you, made you sob and weep and shiver—you'll still try to make it work. He's in awe with you, really. So many nights he spent wishing you'd let him in, let him show you love in the most intimate of ways he knows of, just for it to go so south. Alas, you're still willing; willing to try, for him.

The pause between you is hellishly long, so long you even start to feel a bit nervous. Micah breaks up the silence after what feels like years. "Are you sure, baby?" And as you silently nod, it's all he needs to hear. "I'll do this right, show 'ya how nice it can be." He steps up to you, kneeling before you once again. Micah's hands part your thighs, happy to see you not bleeding any longer. "You trust me?" He looks up at you from between your thighs—a sight you could get used to—as he asks. And you nod again; you do trust him, with your life.

Your wordless nod is enough for him, coaxing you to lay back with one hand on your stomach while rubbing and slowly parting your thigh some more. "I'm gonna take good care of 'ya, hm? You gonna let me, dollface?" Of course you'll let him; you couldn't find it in you to decline him even if you wanted to. Which you absolutely don't. You lean down but keep yourself held up to watch him. "Good," Where he would usually tease or prolong the process, he can't do it to you after what just happened. "did you like how I did it previously?" One quick glance and a nod from you before he lifts his hand off your stomach and slicks him thumb up on his tongue, pressing it to your clit and circling it around.

If he could, he'd get the sweet sounds of pleasure you let out on a record and play it on Dutch's gramophone every damn second of the day.

You're gasping and sighing, looking down at his moving digit over your sensitive nub with hazy eyes, your lips slightly parted the entire time. He's drinking it all in, your sounds and expressions as he works up the wetness between your walls again. You mewl his name a few times, and it instantly un-softens him. "Damn, baby.." He looks mesmerised with you, staring at you like you're the most beautiful thing to grace the planet; which, to him, you most certainly are. After he deems it long enough, he slows down his thumb, not stopping but still moving at a reasonable pace for you to meet him back on earth and in the tent from wherever the blissful experience took you. "Okay, I'm gonna start with one, is that alright with you, princess?" You simply nod, watching him show you his index finger. With your silent consent, he rubs around your entrance briefly before slowly sliding it in, making you gasp briefly but enjoyably. He slowly curls and thrusts it out and back in, repeating the process a few times before looking back up at you. "And, how many do you want me to stop at?" He asks his question carefully, waiting on your response. You contemplate your limit and decide on stopping at three for today, and he nods. "Let's see how that feels for you, hm?" He makes sure to slowly coax the second digit into you, watching your face—both for any discomfort and to see your pleasured facial expression. You sigh, fluttering your eyes closed and clenching around him, which he just gives a faint smile to. "I'mma go real slow, baby," He slides both fingers halfway and curls them, making you breathily moan and clutch onto the sheets. He withdraws them to the very fingertips, then pushes back in a bit more quickly, slowly and surely getting you used to the feeling. Soon enough, you're clenching tightly around three fingers, shuddering and groaning breathily.

"That's it, pretty girl." He's praising you all throughout the process, he's gentle and showing you he cares—that he loves you. He's doing exactly what he planned out; showing you his love in the most intimate way he knows to. He draws his three digits fully into you, a nice curl against your walls that makes you lean your head back slightly. "Heh, 'ya think that's good?" He keeps them inside you a brief moment longer before fully pulling out, giving your sweet juices a taste. You watch him pop his digits between his lips, practically sucking your slick out of his skin. You watch in awe.

He's quick to pop them out of his mouth, chuckling lightly at your reaction to it. "I got somethin' even better for 'ya, darlin'." He drawls, wasting no time in returning his thumb to your bundle of nerves. When you assume that's all, he still manages to surprise you.

Your head rolls back when his tongue enters your cunt, fucking into it. It's quick and repetitive, almost making your head spin from pleasure. You hadn't experienced something like it yet, and you just want more. You grip the sheets and lean back, spreading your legs more. Micah gives you a little hum, patting your thigh as praise with his free hand. Then, he grips it and places your leg on his shoulder, diving back in. This position is all the better—he's brushing all the right spots inside you, making you whine and squirm—and you feel the heat in your stomach rise with every thrust of his tongue to your walls. You let him know of this, and he hums into your cunt, which makes you squeak out another moan. This man...

It's not long before you arch off of the cot and squeeze your thighs slightly, your orgasm meeting you. Micah just continues to eat you out, his moustache getting soaked with the juices of your high. He stops when your legs un-squeeze and let go of him, moving his head away from between your thighs. His lips are glistening, and he comes up to give you a taste of yourself, stealing a long kiss from you while rubbing your outer thigh comfortingly. "Did so good, my girl." He breaks the kiss to grab the rag and wipe off the space between your thighs, affectionately kissing your neck and shoulder while he does so, slowly and enjoyably. Taking care of you how you imagined him to.

When he finishes, he helps get you back into your nightwear. "Next time you want to try, I'm makin' sure we're both ready," He lays himself behind you after blowing the lantern out, like you were before tonight escalated. "and I'll make it an experience you won't forget, babydoll." He kisses the nape of your neck, brushing his moustache over your bare skin while rubbing your abdomen lovingly, showering you in the comfort and praise you knew would come out of him one day.

You trust his words; you know he'll make you enjoy it one day.

Kudos on AO3 always appreciated! I finally finished this fic after putting it off for weeks.. thank you very much for reading it!

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1whore1gang · 11 months ago

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it’s the little things🤍

Catch up HERE on their adventures

IM SO SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG! OMG

Please enjoy regardless

i’m so sorry if this is short or shitty lol

this is more of a filler chapter so i can get to the good stuff and set it all up

Warnings: swearing, some sexual innuendos/content, angst

(i can’t figure out taglists so i’m so sorry if your tag didn’t work or if i forgot you! please yell at me or if you know what i’m doing wrong, again yell at me lol)

I LOVE YOU ALL!!

Taglist: @gaymistakeboi @batw3nch @thedevillovesflowers @almightywdm @ghostslittlegf @sketchyfandomgirl @under-the-dirt @clear-your-mind-and-dream @darkangel4121 @vreselia @llemes @stargaliz @rockcollector3000 @nottrosaxx

It’d been a week and a half since John had arrived to your mission site. Since then, he’d done nothing but take care of you and be at your beckon call. You were feeling much better and began to feel like yourself today.

Currently, you were sat in John’s cabin he had on base, waiting for Tia to call so you could see the boys. You and John were anxious to see them and hear their little giggles.

The phone began to ring as John quickly answered the video call. A young girl, blonde and blue eyed appeared on the phone, Tia you came to know. “Hi guys! The boys are anxious to see you!” Her voice was chipper.

John spoke immediately while you gave a small wave. “Tia! It’s good to hear from you! How have you been? Everything to your liking?”

“Hey John! Everything’s been great! You have the comfiest bed ever. I wouldn’t mind sleeping in it forever!” She lets out a laugh. “The boys have been nothing but pleasant, and the accommodations have been so amazing. I love it here and I think the boys love me too.”

As she says that, I hear the familiar playful scream of Soap and I tear up. John speaks again, “I’m glad you’re comfortable and that the boys haven’t scared you away yet.” They continue light conversation, and I hear Soap’s excited little scream again.

It causes me to cut her off, “I’m sorry, can we see them? I’m dying to see my boys.” She apologizes and chuckles, then sets the phone up so we can see the three boys sitting on the ground.

Soap immediately starts flapping his arms and squealing. “Hi Soap! Hi honey!” I saw giddily and he responds to my voice with more squealing and a goofy smile. It makes me heart swell.

“Hi boys!” John says and Gaz crawls to the camera and begins to tear up. “Oh it’s ok! We’ll be back soon! Don’t cry!” John cooes over the phone.

Soap is a giggling mess, trying to grab the camera and put it in his mouth, but before Tia can react or John or me can talk him out of it, two little hands grab it and we are met with Simon’s little face. “Hi honey! How’s my Simon?” He giggled as he held the phone way too close to his face. “I miss you!!” I continue to coo as we hear excited grunts come from him.

“LIEUTENANT!!” I hear the familiar yell of Captain Snyder. I look over to John, and he can tell I’m dreading what comes next.

“Hey Tia, it was great to talk to you, but duty calls. I’ll call to check in later tonight.” With that, John ended the call. “It’s alright, he’s not going to do anything to you.”

Captain Snyder doesn’t even knock, just barges into the door, staring down John and I. “Captain?! What is she doing here? She needs to be-“

“She does what I say and I said she’s on rest until she’s cleared by medical.” John’s tone went dark as he spoke to Snyder, not even allowing him to finish his sentences.

“You do not interrupt me Captain! I am her mission leader and I say she needs to go run laps for each day she’s missed. She looks just fine to me.”

John stood, towering over Snyder easily. Snyder adjusted his posture to try to match John’s height, but alas, doesn’t measure up. “I wonder how you even made it through boot Snyder. You listen as well as a toddler. I am her Captain, and she will follow my orders only, even after I am gone. I said she’s on rest, so that’s what she’s doing. Do you understand?”

“You are not assigned to this mission as leader! You are simply-“

“I said do you understand?” John stayed calm, but was somehow so threatening.

“No! I have a problem with-“

Once again, John cut him off. “If you have a problem, then you can feel free to call General Shepard and I’m sure he will be happy to tell you about how Lieutenant L/N is under my command only. Are we clear?”

You felt frozen as you heard John speak this way. It was both attractive and yet somehow frightening. Snyder took a deep breath before he spoke. “I will speak with the General then.” He turned on his heel and exited the cabin.

When he did, John immediately switched back into the doting partner you’ve come to know. “I’m sorry you had to see that.” His voice was now sweet again.

“Can I be honest?” You chewed on your bottom lip as you began to conceal a laugh.

“Always my love.”

“That was kind of hot.” The laugh escaped you as the words left your mouth. John looked you up and down before he chuckled himself.

“Was it?” He growled.

“It so was.” He swooped you up and laid you down on his bed.

“Hmm, too bad it’s time for us to hit the hay. We’ve got a big day tomorrow.” John immediately flopped down on top of you, crushing you underneath him as he pretended to snore.

“John!!” You giggled, “I can’t breathe! Get off!!” You laughed loudly as you pushed him off of you. He fell next to you on the bed as he opened his eyes and stopped the snoring noise. “You’re such a dork.”

“I love you.” John’s change in demeanor took you a moment to adjust to. “I really do.”

“John, I love you too.” You say it back.

“No, I’m serious.” John sat up, and you followed his motion.

“I know you are, so am I.”

“No, Y/N, listen to me. When we get back, I want to get serious about us. Get a place outside of the compound, move in together, start our life. We don’t know how long the boys will be little, or if they’ll ever turn back. I want to put us at an advantage if we ever decide to have littles of our own. I want you to be my wife one day, when you’re ready.”

You couldn’t help but tear up. He’d rendered you speechless.

Your little life with John. A house, married, enjoying the little things. It’s everything you’ve ever wanted and more. “I can’t wait.” You say.

The moon falls and the sun rises quicker than you’d like it to and morning pours into the cabin. “Good morning dear.” John’s voice filled your ears. You hummed in response, burying yourself back into the blankets. “You’ve got a lot on your schedule today, you gotta get up baby.”

With a groan, you sat up and saw him in full uniform. “I don’t want to do this today.”

Today you had to get your health evaluation to see if you were fit to return to work, and you knew they’d pass you. You loved watching the embassy, but you didn’t like being under the gaze of Captain Snyder. You knew he’d work you like a dog the moment you got the green light, with or without John’s protection.

“Oh hold on love, it’s Tia. I wanna make sure nothings wrong.” John answered his phone, a sing-songy voice coming out of him as he spoke to Tia. He excused himself as he stepped out of earshot of you.

Dismissing it, you drug yourself out of bed and got into uniform, preparing yourself for the worst. You hoped that Snyder would take it easy on you after the critical condition you and many other soldiers had been in, but you knew you didn’t have that luck.

Looking down, your watch signaled you needed to go, so you went to go grab John, but he was still on the phone.

You pointed to your watch, telling him you both needed to head to medical. “Yeah, that’s what I’m saying.” He laughs as he noticed you. “Hold on Tia.” He covers the bottom of his phone as he tilts it away from his mouth. “I’ll meet you there honey. Tia needs me right now.” He shoots you a sympathetic smile, and you assume it’s a problem with the boys.

Right?

You walk to medical and can’t help but think about Tia. John has been talking to her a lot, is everything ok? Has somebody found out about the boys? Has Shephard noticed her on base? Were the boys okay?

A million thoughts ran through your mind as you felt the scorching heat of the desert sun against your skin. You just hoped whatever it was, John would handle it quickly. You needed him here with you for this.

Entering the tent, you saw Snyder sitting there waiting for you. “Ah, little miss is alone today huh? No big bad wolf to protect you when they clear you for work?”

“Enough. I’m not dealing with your attitude anymore. I’m going to lead my squad and get the fuck home sir.” Snyder was taken aback from your words, but smirked.

“She’s got her own bite now.” You rolled your eyes at him as the nurse came out.

“Wait, we’re waiting on one more person. A couple of minutes please?”

The nurse hesitated, but she said she could allow 10 minutes. Those 10 minutes turned into 15, then 20, then 25. No John.

“I’m sorry, but I really have to get started now. We’ll be more behind than we already are if I don’t.” The nurse rubbed your shoulder as she spoke sympathetically.

“Okay.” You looked to the entrance, hoping he’d make it at the last minute, but alas, nothing.

Snyder watched in anticipation as you completed each test with flying colors. “Alright Lieutenant, you can return to work tomorrow. I’m glad to see you back to yourself.” The nurse handed you a slip with her signature.

Snyder came up behind you and slapped your shoulder as the nurse walked away. “You’re mine as soon as your guard dog leaves.”

You jerked your shoulder away from him as you glared. “Good luck with that.”

Walking away, you heard Snyder yell one more remark. “You will obey your superior unless you want home base hearing about your disobedience for direct orders? That’s a direct dishonorable discharge, isn’t it Lieutenant?”

You knew he was right. “They’d never believe you sir. I’m getting my mission done.” Standing your ground, you said it over your shoulder.

“Try me little girl.” Snyder had nothing but pride and malice in his voice. Sighing, you turned around and walked out.

Completing a couple of other items on your agenda like weapon expection and ration hand outs, you finally headed back to Price’s larger tent.

His bellowing laugh filled your ears before you even entered. You peeked in to see him holding his phone in front of his face, maybe he was seeing the boys or watching a video.

“I’m so glad I got to talk to ya T. Good to hear from you as always. I hope my room makes a good home for you.” You froze.

What?

It wasn’t super weird for him to say, but it still made you uncomfortable. As wrong as you knew it was, you continued to listen. “Always John. The boys miss you and we can’t wait for you to get back.”

John laughed. “How sweet. It sounds like they might be sending me earlier than we thought. Originally it was going to be 3 weeks, but it sounds like I’m leaving in the next couple of days. I’ll be home sooner than we anticipated. It just gives us more time I suppose.”

He’s going home early and didn’t even tell you?

“Yeah! I’m so excited for you to be back! I can’t wait for everything we’ve got planned.” You hear her giggle.

“Me too, we’re going to have so much fun. I can’t wait to see you.” John and Tia muttered a few giddy goodbyes and that’s when you decided to just go back to your own tent.

What was that? You had to misunderstand it right? There had to be context to that conversation. There had to be a logical explanation. Maybe they’re planning for her to be a permanent babysitter?

You wracked your brain for any possible scenario where it didn’t sound like John was cheating on you, and while you came up with a few, something just didn’t sit right with you.

“Hey baby? I’ve been looking for you. What’re you doing here?” John poked his head into your tent.

“You were still on the phone when I came to yours, so I decided to just leave ya alone to finish the call.”

“Oh Y/N, I’m sorry. You should’ve came in anyways! I would’ve hung up, it was just Tia. She was telling me about the day the boys had. Apparently Soap took a few steps today. Simon threw a block at her.”

You couldn’t help the laugh that escaped you. “Simon is probably trying to talk to her.”

“Yeah, I didn’t tell her he does that though. Our little secret huh?” And just like that, all your worries melted away. There was no way he’d cheat on you, let alone with a much younger girl like Tia.

“Our little secret.” You repeated his words. “You’ll love me forever right? You’d never keep anything from me?”

“I will love you until my dying breath, and even more in death. You are my light, my life. I would never hurt you.” Melting into his words, you planted a kiss on his lips.

“I love you.”

“I love you too doll.”

And the world faded away as you cherished this moment with him. Your John was right in front of you, and he had a way to keep your anxieties at bay with just 5 simple words. You leaned into him, taking in his presence.

If only he didn’t have to leave you here in 3 days.

If only he’d told you about it before he left.

If only you hadn’t woken up in his tent alone, with nothing but a note.

#captain price x reader #modern warefare 2 x reader #soap mactavish smut #soap mactavish x reader #tf141 x reader #simon ghost riley #cod mw2 #johnny mactavish #john price #kyle gaz garrick

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acourtofquestions · 5 months ago

Text

Empire of Storms Part 1 thoughts, theories & a VERY VERY long post of rambling:

(+ this title as a spoiler warning; heads up to my fellow fans & first time readers (esp. those semi-tagged in this post), I address a lot of Part 1 & possibly up to Chapter 52 of EoS;-) I am ALSO on my first read just finishing said 52 so no spoilers for me past that as I go through Fireheart as well plz, & thx!

I will also be posting a far shorter better edited version of this post next :-)

Oh good gods this book is going to destroy me in the best way possible😅😅🤦‍♀️😭😁😬😆🤣🙃❤️‍🔥🖤🫶

Long writing/reading (I HAVE LOTS OF THOUGHTS & FEELINGS & NEED TO SCREAM IN WIVERN FANGIRL NONSENSE! So, this post will probably jump around quite a bit between chapters, thoughts, theories, reactions, & randomness; read/skim at your own rambling risk😅 also in advance for missed autocorrects I TRIED😂) “round up” for Part 1 of EoS. & yes I have been reading a LOT (whilst VERY busy😂😭), so this blog’s posts are in desperate need of a catch up & will probably only grow more hectic as alas, my library & brain demand to know what happens next NOW😂. You have been warned this post & blog is about to be more incoherent than usual! — And as I said this post is LONG (If your thinking I’m kidding; legit I think this is 20 something pages long; consider it here for historical purposes… & I had a VERY long drive with no books😂)

— NOW —

The organization of parts is interesting, we go from Nightfall, to The Fire-Bringer, to Fireheart. It feels like a full circle from night to day; from learning to being, and showing Aelin’s claim (not from Elena, not from her powers, but from her). The heart of Terrasen, the fire for the world (esp. against the Valg). … It’s also scaring the heck out of me with her self-sacrificial tendencies & the VERY intense vibe (from the first few chapters this story advances into a “final chapter vibe” yet it’s only the first few; it’s reminding me of Deathly Hallows almost? — which is esp. confusing CAUSE I STILL HAVE 3 BOOKS LEFT… and we’re already this intense😬😅soooo MAAS PLEASE DON’T YOUR DARE HURT A HAIR ON ANY OF THEM!!) P.S. for this note; it’s also making my shipping fuel go from 180 to infinity cause she’s his Fireheart🥹 (If only “worried over liking the ship” HoF first read me could see me now😂 @ goddess-aelin 🫶YOU WERE SO RIGHT👏). And generally it’s just been cool to see how the entire story & series has shifted so much (yet kept its heart ;-) !

So, Generally speaking: I’ve loved the first half of Nightfall & The Fire-Bringer (As I’ve loved the series). From the pace & many perspectives, to the plot twists & Easter egg style hints, and the writing with straight-up foreshadowing & full-circle series arcs (many of which have had big moments interwoven & reaching peak within this book). There has been some great character development (many beautiful lines/moments) a lot of raw emotion (crying, laughing, and all of the above), & entertaining interactions as my favorite piece of this book has been all these stories finally crossing paths (& within that developing relationships, friendships, families, courts, enemies, allies, etc.) for the “New World” that’s coming.

Nightfall:

“Elena sent up a final prayer on a pillar of smoke rising from the valley floor that the unborn, faraway scions of this night, heirs to a burden that would doom or save Erilea, would forgive her for what she was about to do.”

Elena I don’t know if I can forgive you for what you’re about to do😅😅 the plan here is long coming, as Lysandras “theory” further confirms:

"The more it seems like this was all planned, laid out long ago. Erawan had decades before Aelin was born to strike decades during which no one with her powers, or Dorian's powers, existed to challenge him. Yet, as fate or fortune would have it, he moves now. At a time when a Fire-Bringer walks the earth." It was all horrifying, impossible, but—so much of their lives defied logic or normalcy. The shifter next to him proved that. "Morath is unleashing its horrors," Lysandra said. "Maeve stirs across the sea. Two goddesses walk hand in hand with Aelin. More than that, Mala and Deanna have watched over her the entirety of her life. But perhaps it wasn't watching. Perhaps it was ... shaping. So they might one day unleash her, too. And I wonder if the gods have weighed the costs of that storm. And deemed the casualties worth it."

& previous lines on “all the players in the unfinished game” (I’m getting S&B Ruin & Rising vibes (for those of you Grishaverse fans; which btw one of these days I need a whole post about parallels & these two series, cause just the stag and lord of the north alone. I AM INTRIGUED & do love both fandoms ;-) + I think the crows would fit so well & it would be wonderfully & utterly chaotic🤣).

So, my general concern is this theory & warning everyone keeps giving Aelin about “the price”; from Rolfe’s tattoo map & warning question: “"That was the price of my power. What shall yours be, Aelin Galathynius?" She didn't reply to him before storming out. Though Deanna's voice had echoed in her mind. The Queen Who Was Promised.” To clever Elide’s question: “Was that the price for the humans they'd once been-magic that was somehow immune to what flowed naturally in this world? Or had the choice been taken from them, as surely as their souls had been stolen, too?” to crucial warnings like Brannon: “We burn not just within our magic, but also in our very souls. For better or worse.” & the danger continuing to grow like that of the FULL Deanna scene:

“And she said to him, in a voice that was deep and hollow, young and old, "Every key has a lock. Tell the Queen Who Was Promised to retrieve it soon, for all the allies in the world shall make no difference if she does not wield the Lock, if she does not put those keys back with it. Tell her flame and iron, together bound.”

She is the one, she has to get the lock, and she will have to pay the price for both (her ancestors & the darkness created in centuries of Erawan); one that will be heavy (one Elena failed to do; and I somewhat worry is because while she did sacrifice herself, her friends, her people, her kingdom, even letting Brannon fall to ruin (Brannon; the only one who ever successfully sealed it, because he sacrificed her mother, his love, “My mother died to forge that Lock!”) she did not let Gavriel “that which she most loved” fall; she tried to do it alone & was left with no option but to leave it to someone else; another era, another heir); now Aelin carries every thread, plot, battle aligning; the power she wields & sheer force of it, the weight of her crown & every choice it comes with, the price it will demand (the one she has spent a lifetime running from; “my crown is just another set of shackles”; the one Mala may have been shaping her to be able to make even through experiencing tragedy & turbulence in decisions over & over again). The warning in every choice; including the person she loves most (Rowan’s fear of “The people you love are just weapons used against you.”) “This thing between them, the force of it, could devour the world.” Her terror in that; struggling to allow them to go for the front lines while she survives, no longer alone & no longer able to take it all on, but struggling to let them in on the “master plan”. Struggling because even as she does, it weighs on them too: “Aelin was trembling, a hand on her friend-face so white and drawn that any harsh words he'd reserved for her were unnecessary. His queen knew the cost. It had taken her so damn long to trust any of them to do anything. If Aedion roared at her now, even if he still yearned to ... Aelin might never delegate again. Because if Lysandra hadn't been in the water when things had gone so, so badly…” And they do see it; the on-growing burden on Aelin’s shoulders & how she’s carrying the weight of it; both as a queen (despite her current lack of crown) another long-coming plot; as spoken by Chaol: “There she was, that queen looking out at him, a hint of the ruler she was becoming. And it knocked the breath out of him, because it made him feel so strangely young-when she now seemed so old.” And turning her desperate & weary; heavier slowly: “Since Rowan had gone, since word of Rifthold's fall had arrived, Aelin had been half present. Distant.” line after line “She'd grown quieter the farther north they'd traveled. Perhaps weeks on the road had sapped her.” They fear for her “And he wondered if Aelin was somehow watching the archipelago, and the seas, and the skies, as if she might never see them again.” for the price of such powers “We have yet to see the full extent of Erowan’s darkness. And I think we have yet to see the full extent of Aelin’s fire.” & They try to help “After tonight, depending on what the lords reported he'd try to find her a quiet place to rest for a day or two before they made the last leg of the trek to Orynth.” desperate to stop it “"She's not some unwitting pawn." He'd defy the gods, find a way to slaughter them, if they threatened Aelin, if they deemed these lands a worthy sacrifice to defeat the Dark King.” to protect her “Rowan at her right, Aedion at her left, Lysandra at her back; nothing and no one would get to their queen.” all the while they know they cannot as Rowan’s line painfully says: “This was war. These lands would endure far worse in the coming days and months. His queen, no matter how he tried to shield her, would endure far worse.” (Also the key word endure, frequently used for the “lost children of Terrasen” as I call their grouping). To even Aelin’s own words “She was a liar, and a murderer, and a thief, and Aelin had a feeling she'd be called much worse by the end of this war.”

This is where I fear Nightfall will come to rise in Fire-Heart:

I say all of this to say I get concerned when Maas feels the need to start a book with such warning; in both the price, and person paying it… Aelin is too much like Elena… Celaena has lost too much to lose anyone else (“And she would not add another name of her beloved dead to her flesh.” — “"We'll get her back, Aelin." "I can't bury another friend." "You won't."”)… and carrying it so heavily I worry she may overpay her share on their behalf’s. And between that & the many conflicting & star aligning forces of Rowaelin I worry the conflicts may grow; originally it was him not feeling “enough” for her because he’s a Prince not a King, he has no money no land no army (thankfully we are done with that piece because he can give her everything🥹 of his heart and that’s all she needs). We have the inevitable Maeve’s vendetta. We have my growing fear with the Carranam bond getting drained; like it almost did with Deanna. And the quotes all warning that their world may lead to another being destroyed, one or the other; “This thing between them, the force of it, could devour the world. And if they picked it, picked them, it might very well cause the end of it.”

… and though this isn’t due to Nightfall I am just concerned (I try to avoid spoilers (and continue to do so); but I already know it’s got a cliffhanger) and I have read enough Maas books (and just fandoms in general) to fear the 1-2 punch of “THEY’RE ALL GONNA DIE😱 — PSYCH😜 THEY ARE ALL FINE😅 — JUST KIDDING EVERYONE YOU LOVE IS DEAD!☠️” + the amount of possible brainwashing between Valg, Wyrdstones, and now gods… I’m just nervous (& still not 100% sure someone isn’t already secretly possessed).

MY DO NOT KILL LIST IS GETTING TOO LONG: From ASTERIN (scared me half to death SARAH) & Manon + 13 (obvi💁‍♀️), Abraxos & Fleetfoot & Evangeline (had to break my “no Google” rule to assure the latter twos safety *phew*), Aelin & Rowan (DON’T YOU EVEN DARE), Lysandra, Aedion, Dorian (HE’S BEEN THROUGH ENOUGH; STOP HURTING HIM), Elide (just let her be happy & home & make Marion proud dammit), Chaol (he’s not even here & I’m still a little mad BUT STILL) & Yrene (she hasn’t even fully come in yet & I don’t care I love her already) + Nesryn who babe, you know I love you, but I need more history & perspective to trust you fully (you seem cool, but I’m worried the lack of knowledge about you means your gonna lie or die, & it’s just too soon after Sorscha), Emrys (your safe in Mistward; STAY THERE), Sam (beloved, you’re still on this list; even though I know how it ended, & really do LOVE Rowaelin, I just still miss you; & want a Multiverse of happy endings for EVERYONE).

— HOWEVER —

I hope Fire-Heart will bring:

More Manorian; and let’s be honest ALL the ships (+ it could get realll literal with the set-up right now😂 the ships are LITERALLY sailing🤣) of course I CAN NEVER HAVE ENOUGH ROWAELIN (though Fire-Bringer was great 🥵 THEY FINALLY SAID I LOVE YOU🥹👏) & I am SO HERE FOR Lysandra & Aedion! … also what’s up with Elide & Lorcan? (Her last name + his first name TOO SIMILAR😂)

More interactions in general between all the characters from ships, to friendships, to even enemies (who often also become friends😂) honestly might be my fav part about this book so far; seeing it all line up & crossover; (from aforementioned Elide & Lorcan), (to previous & hopefully again soon) Manon & Aelin, the FULL team with THE THIRTEEN (Asterin & our crew would be absolute chaos & I would love every second of it), Sorrel too! AND VESTA! Petrah Blueblood (I find her VERY interesting as a character), Elide & the “lost children of Terrassen” finally meeting; maybe some more Ren & Bane updates (cause I wonder about them & what their up to) to Abraxos & Fleetfoot (PLEASE I NEED THIS… just don’t eat eachother😅😂) & yes I do STILL miss Evangeline & Fleetfoot; though I am happy they are safe; while the fire trick was cool it was SO not sustainable, & I do trust Murtaugh… and these full circles; Ansel’s (presumed) reintroduction & the TAB throw-backs/crossovers (plus NOW Crochans?). —

Exploring things of the sort; what is the other side of the “Crochan’s tale”, what is Elide’s true bloodline, how does the new Mala knowledge effect Aelin & Dorian?

Who are the Cadre (& learning more of their history; both with Aedion & Gavriel (that blood oath better not pass to children), Lorcan (Elide is already helping there thankfully) the other twin because I already stan Fenrys, and really Rowan because who are they really? Despite the “blood oath” reasoning they spent centuries together there has to be more to it). I want to get to know the twins & their whole Yin & Yang balance; also what is Fenrys power? (why does Rowan let him go after Aelin in the water instead, he must be pretty dang powerful & more so than Rowan to be her best option in his eyes)! What other histories does Rowan have (are the “witches” one of them)? What else is Maeve (I will never trust her) hiding?

Why is Erowan this way (who really killed Aelin’s parents)? Are we POSITIVE the Ilken aren’t the creatures Elide saw in the basement (wow that sounds extra ominous😂)?

Will Chaol show up (how is his team & the southern allies coming along)?

What is the limitation to Lysandra’s powers (can they find a way to trick the Terrasen flower into “blooming”)?

Is their further crossover between these series (ACOTAR & CC)?

Explain further how certain things work such as mates (Rowan has two? Celaena/Aelin too maybe? & what that means for others)… And just a lil’ fluff (Rowan & Fleetfoot, the team all together, shenanigans & some side plots for funsies) maybe?…

I theorize Fire-Heart will:

Confirm Rowaelin as mates (they practically have already but I want to hear the words). Plus plenty more of them just being them (their every moment is so detailed & precious). Maybe even some more moments with Prince of Doranelle vibes ;-)

Show that there are multiple Carranams (possibly a dyad between Aelin & Dorian. Rowan & Aelin being the mates balance; making Aelin & Dorian the “friendship / rulers / fates” balance). & Without a limit to their power; the danger of over-draining others (Deanna causing Rowan to feel “thunder steal his magic” is CONCERNING & Dorian’s magic is hungry for it).

Confirm that Aelin can use shadowfire, moonfire, & power without limit. Explore her other gifts such as water & healing. Possibly introduce her as a powerful enough wielder to use all the forms (as briefly referenced as a possibility among others before).

Confirm Lysandra & Aedion as mates or at least a couple. (Also use it to explore Aedion’s history & introduce the Bane or at least their set-up).

Bring back the Mycenians since Lysandra & Aelin’s masterplan worked (THE DRAGON THEORY WAS RIGHT)!

Set sail on Manorian in a way that is explanatory/foreshadowing. (Possibly tap into Dorian’s immortality? & power exploration explanations. And go into Manon’s ability to forge a new alliance of peace between MANY groups; not because I’m suggesting the sexist “get married” nonsense so many are giving Aelin, literally just that she could speak on behalf of many groups & since Darrow has brought diplomatic debates into this war it could be an asset).

Introduce Ansel, and perhaps loop back to the Red Desert (unless the Silent Assassins have disappeared). Showing all of Celaena as we see all of Aelin (letting Rowan know even more of her, healing those wounds as he & her family fully accept her; hopefully doing the same thing for them; going through more history). & Similarly with Rowan; possibly saving the Cadre’s lives through it (or at least stopping Lorcans “execution”).

Tie in the spider silk, between Abraxos’s wings (Manon’s “stealing”), & Aelin’s Red Desert history deals. If not in this book than KoA.

Explain Maeve’s obsession with Aelin & vendetta against the family.

Aelin reclaiming her crown by having the heart of her people (we’ve seen “the future”, there is a woman with hair like moonlight; I think this is Manon. The people chant for her, she is their Queen and that is her court; including the witch).

I think Aelin (like Manon & the other golden eyed 13) are Valg proof. She has the golden eye ring of the Ashryver eyes… in that case maybe Aedion too?? (Hopefully🥺… I mean why else would history write a poem about it?) … While I’m at it let’s make Lysandra’s shifting immune too (protect all my bb’s)!😂

Reveal the Wyrdstone Elide carries as THE Lock (between her last name having the word lock😂 or “loch” I guess, the magic not being immediately recognized as a Wyrdkey by Lorcan, & Kaltain’s promise/importance with an explanation for the “living gate” term). Then when she reaches them so does the thread of fate (once again).

Go to Ellywe & both heal/break my soul (all this travel has made it inevitable; though it is cool to see more of the continents of this fictional world etc.)!🙃

Not something I truly believe but one I wonder on; is there a relation between either Rowan & Manon (history or hair color related😂) or Aelin & Manon (some sort of blood relation; the gold eyes & power levels?).

Not theories but things I think need to happen ASAP: STOP WEARING THE WYRDKEY as a necklace AELIN I DON’T care if it’s a “family heirloom” IT’S A BAD IDEA (have you not seen Harry Potter? — sry for another reference, but seriously DON’T WEAR HORCRUX LOCKETS folks)! Tell Elide the full truth; Celaena = Aelin (at least Lorcan is getting close). Commit to immortality (I’m looking at you Aelin & Aedion; esp. Aelin… ROWAN NEEDS THIS; the only time I will ever encourage a woman to “settle”😂)! Address the very long list of “things for later/back burner” because I can’t keep track😂 & they are all WAY too important😅, dangerous😬, and THE LIST IS LONG SO HURRY UP Y’ALL😁!!!

— NOW ONTO THE “ACTUALLY” READ “BIG PORTION😂 —

The Fire-Bringer:

A lot of reactions have random posts; per usual many of the opinions change with hindsight, but I like being able to look back & enjoy it for the first time so (while I do try to give an update) I’ll probably leave the posts up :-) hoping to get a few lil (by that I mean pages jk sry not sry lol I warned you) notes I’m pondering on in here though…

I love the Little Folk’s little but magical role:😊 when (not if; I’m gonna will it into reality with terminology) this gets an adaptation I can’t wait to see them! — I really love the fan art & its many different takes for what they may be all the way from fairy’s, to wisps, to “baby-Groot”-like characters! … I also wonder if they could help out with that “rulers flower thing” possibly, same as pondered for Lysandra (I think these “little things” will be keys to helping Aelin with “dum-dum Darrow” (as I’ve dubbed him; cause I’m angry! & it may be only a 1st read impression as of right now, but he’s also given me 0 reason to like him).

The Oakwald forest: EVERYONE IS SO CLOSE yet SO FAR! (At least Manon has finally made it to the team… well kinda… she better actually MAKE IT past the ship drop-off… if you can call it that?😅 this is why I need to type fast & go read!) If Tower of Dawn manages to match this pace of “just-missed, kinda-crossover” I see why the tandem read would work! It’s quite fun (& semi-irritating/anxiety-inducing but in a good way😂).

Speaking (writing?😂) of Manon: TALK ABOUT IMMEDIATE CHAOS, each of her chapters have been SO intense. I might have cried with her the most so far; I legitimately almost lost it over Asterin’s almost execution & The Thirteen (I AM VERY GLAD THEY FINALLY LEFT THE MATRON & got out so they can please be safe now; or at least they already are in my mind; though last we saw them it was all chaos, they were running (a win) & the shadows seemed to confirm them getting out (another good sign) while Asterin being dragged off screaming isn’t great I think she was shouting for Manon because she didn’t want to leave her… & I refuse to accept any other answer) only problem is Manon is not with them; & she really needs to be😅😅😭 instead of half-dead in the woods, hunted by a banshee-hound-thing? Abraxos honey, thank you for taking care of mother🥹😂 at least she is with the team on the same-ish side now. So, hopefully Abraxos will go grab the rest of The Thirteen while he drops Manon off? I NEED THE WHOLE GANG; I mean Erawan & Maeve are screwed in that case. Esp. since most of them are Valg proof golden eyed; & also have you seen these gals fight? … Honestly, I think they are one of the great shows of good writing in these books; because these characters could easily be read as villains & psychopaths to be hated, yet they manage to be a compelling, interesting, group of female badassery & sisterhood, that really captures your heart (pun intended). HOWEVER, I say all of this Spoiler-free while not oblivious; I have 2 &1/2 books left (wow that’s numbers too small I’m gonna get sad😅😂) I know people say this ending is a hard, & a book of cliffhangers… So, if this is “just” the beginning it can only get crazier😅 (I just don’t want to know; I want to think this will be like ACOTAR with no deaths as long as I can believe it) & even with the Matron’s probable on-it’s-way “dispatch”, they managed to hide Asterin for years. My main concern is Sorrel & Vesta as they’ve been given enough time to love them, yet not enough time for a full arc, I can’t have any red shirts & I’m a little worried for them (but I just wanna love them as long as I can🥹).

I’m so glad I was right; from day ONE I’ve been wondering about Aedion & Lysandra cause *coughs* I mean their first scene together ever… she’s changing his shirt… and now the whole “wandering off to give Rowaelin time” which while a fair-ish excuse it is also a little ;-) ;-) … and now that he’s said he’s gonna marry her “Because I am going to marry you," he promised her. "One day. I am going to marry you.”… I’m counting it (why is it giving New Girl CeCe & Schmidt?😂)

But in all seriousness ship-ness aside I appreciate their friendship; the understanding of each-other with a healthier trauma bond (for all they cannot say, yet carry so heavily; all the shame & fear Aedion is wrestling with; & the steady acceptance Lysandra gives) I loved them both as is, but together is something precious & nice to see develop (while staying slow, taking time, surety of respectful). While at times it feels fast, it makes complete sense (esp. as we don’t get their perspectives as frequently, & with the knowledge that mates can be pretty immediate; even if it’s not “said”; it tracks).

Though it hurt (& was also kinda healthily valid) to hear Aedion be angry with Aelin, it also says a lot about how much he cares for Lysandra (as Aelin often can “do no wrong in his eyes”) to be angry in the first place “And for the first time, he hated his cousin. He hated Aelin for asking this of Lysandra, both to defend them and to secure the Mycenians to fight for Terrasen. Hated the people who had left such scars on the shifter that Lysandra was so willing to throw her life away. Hated ... hated himself for being stuck in this useless tower.” While also knowing it’s not her fault, it is her choice, but it also had to be (he at least knows that & does cut her slack). “He was shaking now, that rage indeed taking over. But Rowan snarled at him, low and vicious, "Save it for later." Aedion growled right back at him. Rowan gave him a cold, steady look that said if he so much as began to hint at what their queen carried, he'd rip out his tongue. Literally. Aedion shoved down the anger. "We can't carry her, and she's too weak to shift." "Then we wait here until she can," Aelin said. But her eyes drifted to the bay, and to the city beyond, still cheering. victory—but very nearly a loss. The remnants of the Mycenians, saved by one of their long-lost sea dragons. Aelin and Lysandra had woven ancient prophecies into tangible fact. "I'll stay," Aedion said. "You deal with Rolfe." "Fine," he said. Aelin groaned, getting to her feet, but stared down at him before she took Rowan's extended hand. She said softly, "I'm sorry." Aedion knew she meant it. He still didn't bother replying.” & knows (because Lysandra makes him better; as she already reminds him with her knowing compassion): “"That man has endured enough, Aedion. A little kindness wouldn't kill you." "He stabbed Aelin. If you knew him as I have, you wouldn't be so willing to fawn over. "No one expects you to fawn over him. But a kind word, some respect-" He rolled his eyes. "Keep your voice down." She did- but went on, "He was violated, and even if you cannot draw up forgiveness for stabbing Aelin against his own will, then try to have some compassion for that." — Aedion snarled at her. Lysandra snarled right back and held his stare with the face not trained or built for bedrooms, but the true one beneath—wild and unbroken and indomitable. No matter what body she wore, she was the Staghorns given form, the heart of Oakwald Aedion said hoarsely, "I'll try." "Try harder. Try better."”)

& Then moments like him asking her to come with him to meet Gavriel, & she simply does. Or that she trusts him to carry her home, vulnerable & tired. I think they give a lot of what the other needs while growing to be who they are themselves. Plus Lysandra deserves to be a leopard princess, sister-in-law(ish) to Aelin. “Princess Lysandra Ashryver sounds nice, doesn't it?” YES IT DOES!

Speaking of Lysandra (who is seriously one of my all time favorites; I relate, I adore her, and really it just doesn’t get better then all of these characters) I WAS RIGHT ABOUT LYSANDRA BEING A DRAGON!!! GENIUS!! And also LYSANDRA WAS A DRAGON!!!!!! I love her & Aelin’s plotting (which also gets kinda Kaz Brekker vibes sometimes; she is so brilliant, & the fact Lysandra just piles into the shenanigans; I love them). TALK ABOUT POWER! Also what fun genius for mythology… winning the people’s hearts… etc. …if only she could turn into a flower… and making that moment the first perspective we have from her in this book was so fun! Shoutout to @ asexualzucchini for fandoming about this with me (heads up again cause I know your on a first read too; THIS POST HAS SPOILERS for Pt. 1 ;-)

ELIDE & LORCAN; a team-up I was NOT expecting, yet find SO intriguing. From highlighting Elide (which is well deserved) esp. in her truest strength; smarts (her & Annabeth Chase would’ve been besties) and as something even Lorcan sees & values greatly, extra fun as in combo to his physical strength it’s a pretty perfect team (& a helpful combo for storytelling because you see his perspective which is of course very different then spoken threats from Rowaelin perspectives ONLY; & of course once again while I’m curious to learn more on the Cadre; esp. since Lorcan often to me just seems angry to have “lost” his friend). And I do love the boundaries they respect (even as an unknown dare I say “anti-hero”? Lorcan still has some clear moral lines (& I generally appreciate that in the Maasverse that everyone except the worst of the worst can agree where those are) he also keeps his word a VERY intriguing piece of his character), also the representation they give (go team disability represent!) + small girlies hanging out w big brooding boys (there’s my “kitty” style reference for you Aelin lol). Also funny cause eventually they’re gonna end up in the same place😂 P.S. him calling her MARION (gut-wrenching), Crochan history (very curious), etc. IT’S JUST ALL SO INTRIGUING! … Now if we could only have an empowering crossover so she can go talk to Feyre & realize she’s already intelligent, powerful, & capable, & not being able to read has no effect on that!! (while we’re at it & I’m on a crow comparison kick; go hug Wylan please).

Another team up I didn’t expect but surprisingly loved most was Dorian & Rowan’s roadtrip through Rifthold (new movie adaptation idea?😂):

Dorian, Dorian, Dorian where do I begin? — I love him. I think he might be the most morally grounded character (odd as that sounds for someone that was recently possessed). He would be a good king, because most important he’s just a good man. My heart breaks for him, he’s seen a lot without time or space to deal with it (it’s just adding up; “The latter, Dorian realized, usually happened when even the heat and sun couldn't drive away the shadows of the past few months—when he awoke with his sweat feeling like Sorscha's blood, when he couldn't abide even the brush of his tunic against his neck.”); yet he still gives everything he can to his friends, his people, his country (& Rowan gives & takes care of him too (another Aelin paralell/foreshadowing; “"You're not going to believe me," Aelin went on. "What l've just said, you're not going to believe me. I know it--and that's fine. I don't expect you to. When you're ready, I'll be here.”) ; “He wasn't sure whether to thank the Fae Prince for noticing or to hate him for the kindness.” — Because Rowan knows; “"You're going to hate the world, Dorian. You are going to hate yourself. You will hate your magic, and you will hate any moment of peace or happiness. But I had the luxury of a kingdom at peace and no one depending upon me. You do not."”); and somehow Dorian just remains good and kind even when the world is not. He may carry more, but it is never an excuse for him; he sets aside his pride, humbled, un-selfish, caring, and really trying. (remarkable enough that even Rowan notices & takes note; “I have known many kings in my life, Dorian Havilliard. And it was a rare man indeed who asked for help when he needed it, who would put aside pride.”) And I also appreciate that he is cared for in this, seen for who he is; respected in it (FINALLY said quite well in: “Rowan knew most underestimated the sharp intelligence under that disarming smile. Knew that Dorian's value wasn't his godlike magic, but his mind”)

And getting the friends & care he deserves, like Aelin who kept her word “I came back for you. "You both came back,"” (he is her friend, she does care for him) as it’s shown because she went so far as to send Rowan (someone she would NEVER risk; “"I will save him," he murmured. "I wouldn't ask this of you unless it was ... Dorian is vital. Lose him, and we lose any support in Adarlan." And one of the few magic-wielders who could stand against Morath. Rowan's nod was grim. "I serve you, Aelin. Do not apologize for putting me to use." Because only Rowan, riding the winds with his magic, could reach Rifthold in time. Even now, he might be too late. Aelin swallowed hard, fighting the feeling that the world was being ripped from under her feet.” (When she says “losing support” she pauses; because really it’s about losing Dorian her friend, remember she’s always coming from the mindset of “she will not write another name on her scars” almost to the level of her “I will not be afraid mantra” fading in from QoS in this first EoS quarter) so she wouldn’t risk him even in leaving her side (which props to Maas for breaking a typical VERY possessive YA trait; even at the cost of a promise-ish from the last book; “Next time we need to save the world, we do it together. Deal.”). & keeps keeping that promise to save him; not only to keep her word, but keep her friend. Along the way he so easily becomes Rowan’s friend, thawing the ice by just being a decent guy (that says a lot for a centuries old Prince of stoic brooding). I love the genuine respect they have for each other; the time they take (even short as it is) to have a mini-boat therapy session because they needed it; it says a lot about the two of them as good men; the way they help each-other, plan & train together (Dorian even has time to understand Aelin’s time away with a new compassion😅😅 “Honestly, Dorian had no idea how Aelin had survived months of this--let alone fallen in love with the warrior while she did. Though he supposed both the queen and prince possessed a sadistic streak that made them compatible” & even see Rowan get a taste of the Celaena Sardothien world & find he has similar sass). vice-versa you also see someone valuing Rowan’s strength, strategy, personality beyond warrior or prince, without any of this “male pride chest-puffing instinct”. And the way despite the change in new healthier friendships you also have the original ones growing with them “"And will keep changing," she said, squeezing his arm once. "But... There are things that won't change. I will always be your friend." His throat bobbed. "I wish I could see her, just one last time. To tell her... to say what was in my heart." "She knows," Aelin said, blinking against the burning in her eyes. "I'll miss you," Dorian said. "Though I doubt the next time we meet will be in such …civilized circumstances." She tried not to think about it. He gestured over her shoulder to her court. "Don't make them too miserable. They're only trying to help you."” It helps both him and them; like the team they need to be & are finding a way in: “"We'll figure it out." She loosed a breath. "But your being king is the first step of it."” Like the Queens & Kings they have been becoming for a world slowly building; starting with the fact he is one of the good men that do exist (like Nehemia & Celaena said) and as already shown: “Ten years later, and they were all sitting together at a table again--no longer children, but rulers of their own territories. Ten years later, and here they were, friends despite the forces that had shattered and destroyed them. Aelin looked at the kernel of hope glowing in that dining room and lifted her glass. "To a new world," the Queen of Terrasen said. The King of Adarlan lifted his glass, such endless shadows dancing in his eyes, but--there. A glimmer of life. "To freedom."” esp. as he helps raise up women in positions of power to do so as well! (We love a King ally)

Much like Aelin growing into a queen you see the shift as Dorian becomes a King. “Never again. Never again would he be weak and useless and frightened.” (From a quote I appreciated and found Nesta paralells in). “To her surprise, a king smiled back.” And I just hope somewhere along the way Dorian also finds his happy ending much like our queen is slowly finding a way too (like Rowan said; “You will find your way, too, Dorian. You'll find your way out.”); I think Manon is promising, I think he finally has a real family, & he’s learning his power which is good; his already Kingly skills also come in handy, they needed a diplomat. And for two characters I love so much, a genre that rarely shows good friendships between so many characters and guys having emotions and bonding beyond a love interest trope… I just loved it! p.s. thanks again @ mysterylilycheeta for fandoming about this one with me (and many others :-)

Now speaking of Dorian quotes (plus I needed a transition lol) much like Dorian I do sometimes miss Chaol; “"You know," he said, "sometimes I wish Chaol were here to help me. And then sometimes I'm glad he's not, so he wouldn't be at risk again. I'm glad he's in Antica with Nesryn.”while also being glad he’s off somewhere else… not just ‘cause of the injury (I actually hope they don’t make that THE “problem”, at least in the sense of making him “useless”. While healing in a magical realm is a useful skill, representation of disabled characters in the read world is also really important & still super kick-ass & powerful)… So, I’m glad he’s gone not for that but for the fact I think his mentality would conflict right now (& while Aelin isn’t always right; & does sometimes need a check as Aedion aforementioned & does this at least better thank Chaol in timing & how) + most of the time ya kinda need to just “keep calm & trust the process” because while “the gods may have some “masterplan” & only Aelin can outsmart & outplan them (you just have to let her go for it)… and hopefully Elide will be there to help soon!

Now speaking of good friends, & the rest of this post from “threads of fate”, to really loving characters, friendships, relationships (even most of my favorite quotes) it’s time to address THE SHIP because there is ROWAELIN. TRULY WHERE DO I START? I love them. They are perfect. Nothing can break them (Nothing better try). I love the peace & hope they hold for the other (they want more together, for each other; to live.). The balance they carry; especially when one is down, the other lifts them up (even rapidly flipping; I’m a few Chapters into Part 2 (spoiler sentence)🚨 & there’s the moment where it goes from her being on fire & him waking her from her nightmares, to him so panicked to save her he’s freezing the room & she’s soothing him). The way they are so alike, & shown even more so (as I’ve briefly mentioned) in this book (Rowan having some Celaena moments, her taking on a leader & diplomatic role, learning to control water & him teaching her to heal, exploring each others histories & a growing team of friends for & with them) & VERY different (they are the balance even in what they do share; for instance a scene I think on frequently: when Rowan leaves to go get Dorian, and Aelin cannot let him go. Right there she uses very specific words; she does not ask him to stay instead she says she cannot let him go; because she knows asking him to stay (like Lyria had begged) would kill him or telling him “he’s leaving her” would utterly destroy them both. And he does the same; he distracts her (knows what she needs) takes a moment for them (stops the clock) kisses her and then leaves before she opens her eyes in a flash, so she does not have to watch him leave (again), or (be the one to) walk away from him (he knows she already used all of her will to even have him go in the first place, she cannot ask anything more or she will not ask at all), or run again. They both are feeling the same thing, while understanding the differences they have experienced, they take the notice to love the other the way they need & the only way they can). Part of it stems from something I’ve adressed on the blog before, the honesty they share; and desperately needed. Or have discussed with other fans in beyond that the fact they trust, they can have it all on the table, and respect what has to be kept. Part is the fact they are the others soulmate (waiting for those words: “mate” to “officially” & finally seal what we ALL know by now😂). Another being the threads of fate every character keeps seeing; they are VERY tightly bound beyond separation; for better or worse a tangled knot that can not be undone.

The way in that they would fight by the others side, live & die together, for each-other. They would save the world for each-other (like Rowan jumping in front of the moonfire because he knew her fiery soul; “"No!" The word was a roar, a plea, and silver and green flashed in her vision. A name. A name clanged through her as he hurled himself in the path of that fist, that moonfire, not just to save those innocents in the city, but to spare her soul from the agony if she destroyed them all-Rowan.” — “"If you had destroyed that city, it would have destroyed you, and any sort of hope at an alliance."”) It goes beyond taking a bullet for the other, it goes to taking a bullet from the other (you see that side a lot in HoF). They would save the other for the world (like he says, the world needs alliances; because he knows it needs her, his queen). Or the other from the world; “And as his face became clear, his tattoo stark in the sun, as that fist full of unimaginable power now opened toward his heart-There was no force in any world that could keep her contained.” Together, to whatever end. They would even destroy it for the other; “But if it was death separating us … I would find you. I don’t care how many rules it would break. Even if I had to get all three keys myself and open a gate, I would find you again. Always.” They deserve something that’s an always, known, world & gods defying. And while I appreciate the way they defend each other, I also appreciate the way they defend their friends together; it may be them to whatever end, but it’s also not just them against the world (more so for the world?) they may be capable of destroying the world for each other, still they choose to give everything to save it. They choose each other, they continue to do so, to accept, to be honest. “Even if this thing between them ... even if he knew it was not mere lust, or even just love. This thing between them, the force of it, could devour the world. And if they picked it, picked them, it might very well cause the end of it.” they have a powerful love (one that is quite literally more powerful together). I love that scene too, the carranam; the way he steadies her (he knows why the manacles scare her, knows how to help her breathe despite it; “she is not afraid”), trusts her (she could kill them both, but he believes in her, always has, even before she believed in herself) gives her his power (talk about a feminist ally😂 he literally uses his power to give her more power), and she blazes the world (better & worse); she trusts him enough for the irons (something she may have killed someone else for), she trusts his trust in her (it empowers her metaphorically too), trusts him to save her from herself; trusts him which as this line shows; “"You trust nothing. She met his eyes. "I trust you."” is almost a miracle in itself. I love the easy rhythm they fall into like breathing, simple domesticity (even among war), natural understanding (soulmates), gentle unconditional stubborn & unchanging love that simply is. & is accepted as such. Learning more of their history in parallels & new perspectives, tales & legends, chaos & opposites (especially opposed in power) FIRE & ICE and remains the “meant to be” Carranam; though one of a kind it also understands itself in being love among grief, giving it the ability to see & soothe the unhealthy internal monologues… in a way that’s honestly kinda healing to read; I love their quotes, I love their scenes, I love their characters, I just love them.

It’s been fun to see more Aelin as Aelin, (and I’m not meaning “The one in green smiled, but for all its delight, all its wicked mischief ... It was a softer smile, made with a mouth that was perhaps less used to snarling and teeth-baring and getting away with saying hideous, swaggering things. Lysandra, then. The two queens faced Rolfe.” Lysandra twin-swap scene 😂) the way Celaena is now recognized as a part to play; “You met Aelin when she was still pretending to be Celaena” — “Because it was Celaena who sat here-for whatever purpose, it was Celaena Sardothien in this room.” from the way Rowan helped & accepted her all along. Rowan has always been her protector, her guard, her best champion, fiercest warrior & love, her dearest friend, her everything. It’s the one that saw all & loved anyways “to have one person who knew the absolute truth about her--and didn't hate her for it.” — “I see you, I see every part of you. And I am not afraid.” he is not afraid of her; the first time she’s ever had that… Something she desperately needs as someone so fear-based… She went from being a child who was never not afraid; she was taught to fear her power, fear the secret coming free, because she would be persecuted; because her people would not love her for what she was; she was protected against it and taught her powers weren’t to be trusted. She spent so long burying herself… Arobynn taught her that; created a world of only that for her to exist in, only to survive never to live. And as I’ve said before I LOVE SAM, I truly think he would have accepted her without flinching (I love & believe in the many soulmates for many lives theories; he was Celaena’s) but over & over again the saddest four words of almost they never had time. Thinking someone would love you “even if” is different that getting to experience it, she was still afraid he would turn her in or turn away, he would judge her as she judged herself, or didn’t know “how dark she could go”; like he was too good and she would drag him down. And here is Rowan: the one person who could stop her (the dark comfort she takes in knowing he could save the world if she endangered it; “That is how I was able to stand before the King of Adarlan, how I was able to befriend his son and his captain, how I was able to live in that palace. Because I did not give that rage, those memories, one inch. And right now I am looking for the tools that might destroy my enemy, and I cannot let out the monster, because it will make me use those tools against the king, not put them back as I should--and I might very well destroy the world for spite. So that is why l must be Celaena, not Aelin--because being Aelin means facing those things, and unleashing that monster. Do you understand?”) and doesn’t think that of her; “For whatever it's worth, I don't think you would destroy the world from spite.”

To the moment on the beach that strikes me again & again; Aelin in her rawest state (inner child & traumatized immortal), sobbing, unclothed (a very important detail not because of the rest of Chapter 38 spice but because of the psychological component; she is stripped down to her core at her worst, most vulnerable, visibly terrified uncomfortable state; it’s more like a nightmare of giving a speech & realizing your the only one without clothes), on fire (no hidden power or sense of control), unleashing an entire storm (after almost destroying the world; her world; even against her will); because she is Aelin Ashryver Galathynius “the rightful heir of fire” and Queen of Terrasen; she has been “Adarlans Assassin” & a “King’s Champion” Lillian, Elentiya, Celaena… all of these names… and yet, she is still afraid. And she cannot stop it; she is trying & failing, feeling every step backwards for every step she takes, she is running to nowhere, she is lost. And then there is Rowan. Rowan, who walked to the creak to see her, and went loudly so she would know & not be afraid. Rowan who knows when she needs to let off steam (literally) & has been burned & still does not turn away from her. Rowan who now is “silent as death” because he knows her mind is already screaming enough for the both of them. Rowan who follows her; over & over, unflinching, returning, staying, seeing, & still believing in her (even before she believed in herself; even when she cannot). She is begging for anyone that listens to take the job & all its “blessings & burdens of power”, wishing for a bottom to the endless abyss of her power, drowning in it; helpless in her own strength, because she does not trust herself (how can she when she can’t even be herself; not just Celaena; but Deanna), trying to run from herself. And Rowan who sees, hears, knows; and only cares about her. Choosing her. Loving her. Telling her those words. Arguing against the voices in her head for her; making her feel for a moment that maybe somehow she’s worth it (or at least too lucky to care even if she’s not). Because he has every reason to go; he knows what he could lose (even as they stand there; he is still shaken & terrified; he just saw a god steal the woman he loves from her own mind; he has no idea how to fight that & bring her back) He has lost that; felt it for centuries The world may be the price, they may be the price, they are in the middle of a war waged & waiting for hundreds of years; and he does not care. He only cares about her; better & worse. And she is not alone; never again. Reminding her that she can be both, staying on the road. As he says (a quote that made me cry): “You and I will learn to manage your power together. You do not face this alone; you do not decide that you are unlovable because you have powers that can save and destroy. If you start to resent that power… I don’t know where we go on that road.” And when she voices it, that fear (that brought me to tears); you’re just crazy for loving me.“"Because I'm the only one arrogant and insane enough to ask Mala Fire-Bringer to let me stay with the woman I love. Her flames turned to pure gold at the words-at that word. But she said, "Perhaps you're just the only one arrogant and insane enough to love me."” He simply, firmly, undoubtably, says no. … And when the times comes; when he creates a snow storm of his own (& destroys half a forrest😂) she just laughs, holds him closer, kisses him again. As she says; “who would not look at those flames with any ounce of fear.” as anyone else would have. They aren’t afraid of each other, they aren’t afraid, not together. “But Rowan had caught her each time she had fallen-first, when she had plummeted into that abyss of despair and grief; second, when that castle had shattered and she had plunged to the earth. And now this time, this third time ... She was not afraid.”

And because they are equal, because they will go to whatever end, because they pull each other back over & over whenever/wherever they drift. (And while I love Lyria, I believe she was one of his soulmates) I don’t think anyone ever understood him so well in return… Rowan loved Lyria. Lyria wanted him to stay for good reason, but he was not able to tire to rest to settle; she did not understand the warrior; just as he couldn’t understand enough not to be. Where peace was never quite had, the warrior that could not rest; there is Aelin. Who just goes to war with him, for him, for them. She is his hope, his queen, his love, his world, his fireheart🥹, & his everything (& thankfully NOT because of the blood-oath; “"How does she do it?" Aelin asked baldly. "With Rowan, it's not ... Every order I give him, even casual ones, are his to decide what to do with. Only when I actively pull on the bond can I get him to ... yield. And even then it's more of a suggestion." "It is different with her," Gavriel said softly. "Dependent on the ruler it is sworn to. You two took the oath to each other with love in your hearts. You had no desire to own or rule him." Aelin tried not to flinch at the truth of that word—love. That day ... when Rowan had looked into her eyes as he drank her blood ... she'd started to realize what it was. That the feeling that passed between them, so powerful there was no language to describe it ... It was not mere friendship, but something born of and strengthened by it.” glad they clarified that to give consent). I’ve said this about them before and I’ll say it again there is something healing in how wholly they accept and understand each other (to the point you would think they are reading minds), how evenly matched and equal they are. They are two of the best matched characters I know of; at times even to a fault (but even that is taken in stride). Aelin and Rowan are everything they have ever been with the other. This isn’t a comparison, there’s something beautiful to each of them (I’ll even still say that to Dorian & Aelin, the way their friendship came to be, and re-reads what might have been) there is just the fact that this is different and I think it’s a special kind of something. And the fact in the matching for the other they can go to the ends of the earth together; whether it be as Queen and Prince (though he would make a good king ;-) or assassins, gentle souls trying to rest, never at rest but trying for peace, fae and shifters fire and ice, warriors, martyrs, saviors, villains, Kings Champion & Maeve’s Cadre, friends, mates, whatever it may be “to whatever end”.

I especially love them in the little things… all these moments that show everything I’ve said and more.

The detail in Rowan knowing the other side to Aelin keeping him at the beach, and it not taking away from the moment. He knows, he accepts it. They know the layers, they don’t pretend otherwise, they don’t run or fight it, they just sit with it. The way he held her & grounded her during the sea battle, believing in her even as she lost her balance in power, the way she came back from Deanna for him, the way she held on to him through the storm. She reminds him what he is; that he is everything she needs, she doesn’t take the bullshit, she doesn’t give up; she lends a hand, or lets him follow, or defends him. And they finally said it; I love you. — Actually better than that, worlds best quote award of: “I love you. There is no limit to what I can give to you, no time I need. Even when this world is a forgotten whisper of dust between the stars, I will love you.”They finally chose this, them; and the world needed it (I will go down with the ship of them as queen and king). … So, my shippers heart is happy, I want more, I’m happy they’re happy, I want them to stay happy. They are the best brightest threads of fate & for a book I’ve loved to see tie together, the Rowaelin ship has been pretty perfect.

And some random notes I keep wondering on:

The color green in this series… From Lysandra’s eyes (the one marker she keeps in each form; funny as it’s also Terrasen (her future Courts) color, to Rowan’s pine green (& often “home” like Terrasen descriptions (once again)) to the green roofing of Rifthold, or tiling of the desert, the stolen wax stamp rings, Terrasen’s color, etc. … it’s just used to tell a lot of story & I find it a fun note!

On the subject of these “fun notes” I’d also like to Mention Maasverse “deals” in wording; I find it so interesting how carefully phrased (like a genie) things need to be, yet kept to their word they are. I feel like there’s some loopholes within some plots right now using that clause (if only there was Mort to prove it!)… I miss Mort…

There’s all of Lysandra’s shapeshifting, the character in that, her character all together. And then moments like Rowan reaching her to fly, to have her own wings. And introducing more powers outside of fae.

Fenyrs possible… winnowing? Whatever reason it was that Rowan sent him to save Aelin instead of himself (obviously meaning he was more capable because Rowan would save her any means necessary).

And these aforementioned threads of fate are pretty brilliantly done, I look forward to continuing to enjoy them. From Oakwald to 10 years ago to the detail of plans (Aelin going to the temple, for Brannon & the Dragon, & her territory claim… etc.)… SO MANY!!!

Especially because of YOU!..

— Final, biggest most important book/fandom thought yet: —

THANK YOU to the Maasverse!

As someone who doesn’t know anyone reading these —one of my favorite things to do is talk about them with other fans— I’m thankful to still have that; I’m thankful that tumblr has that; and thankful that y’all are so welcoming, kind, talented, & lovely! (Limiting full tags as this post is ridiculously long and no one should “have” to read it😂)

There’s a long list of you, to name a few (others please know you are still on the list, loved & appreciated)!! @ archerons-elain @ highladyelenna @ iwantavaldezinator @ romantasyreader28 @ antvwinderbaum @ shadowhunters77 @ chaos-on-stand-bi @ theauroragalaxy @ impossibelle @ aelin-fire-heart @ autumnbabylon @ headboymalfoy @ somebooksbelonginthesinbin @ idfendyr @ winged-artistic-wolf @ batter-upp @ cheap-spirits @ just tsteffs50cts @ xxvalkyriesxx @ captain-of-the-gwynriel-ship @ lynnsthoughts @ maevecrom @ stingy-swann @ mothlvrtothemoon @ wannaberachelgrxxn @ sweetokami @ avymiir

& so if I missed any, like I said just know you are so appreciated🫶 … and sorry I get confused sometimes (as this is technically a secondary blog to @lavendarneverlands lol😂). It’s always me though🤣

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