#akira is clearly not good at making excuses

[gakoiart]

Joker & Crow's peculiar battle

TW: bruises, blood, errr implied indecent act in the image below 👀

[milkyluxe]

Just for tonight

My entry for day 4 of KagiHira week 2023 Prompt: needy Please be considerate with me, It's been literally over a decade since I last wrote a fanfic, but what can I say? these boys got me down BAD So this is basically Hirano being needy. Set in the winter where Kagi is a 2nd year and Hirano is about to graduate. He's stressed and anxious. Enjoy! :) Also a biiiig thanks to my bestie @cutiesaur for being my beta reader. She really helped a lot! <3

Just for tonight

Physics. Yes, he should study physics a bit more…make sure he knows all of the formula variations there could ever be. Perhaps, he should go over all the problems again? Or  maybe it was a better idea to study maths? Just a bit more wouldn’t hurt to make sure he was on top of every problem he could need to solve. Maybe he should eat. When was the last time he stood up?...How long had he been in this trance? Ugh, he should tidy up his desk. All the mess inside his head couldn’t…or shouldn’t be also present in the physical world. Taiga Hirano grunted. Goddamit, why can’t days be 36 hours, right? 

“Hirano-san”, his roommate's voice snapped him out of his clustered focus mode, “are you gonna stay up late again?”. Akira Kagiura was already laying on his bed, pretending to read a fashion magazine, but in reality he hadn’t turned the pages in over thirty minutes. He had spent the whole time staring at Hirano, not because he was oh so in love with him, but because the blonde hadn’t moved a muscle in hours; no, in days. 

College entrance exams were just around the corner. Kagi had always known how much of a dedicated student Hirano was, he admired him for it, but these past days he had the impression his senior was pushing himself way too hard. It had been a little over a week since he had started ignoring the “lights out” time and kept studying on his desk with a little desk lamp that couldn’t be good for his eyes. He went down to the dining hall just to mindlessly shove food down his throat the fastest he physically could. Kagiura was  sure he wasn’t chewing  properly. “Sorry… I really need to go back up and study”, Hirano had been  excusing himself, but did he really need to study that much?

It’s just the last spurt. That’s what Hirano thought. 

“Uh -Yes, I- …Yes, I think so”, he finally answered with his head clearly still in his notes. “Is the light too bright? Does it make it hard for you to fall asleep?"

“If I say yes, will you stop studying and go to sleep too?” Kagi asked. He  somewhat regretted the tone in which that sentence came out, more annoyed about the light and less worried about his beloved; the latter being how he truthfully felt. Hirano turned on his chair and looked at the brunette for a while, or at least what felt like a while to Kagi. Hirano had a similar gaze in his eyes as the one he had had when Kagi first met him. “No” he said plainly. 

Now Kagiura was mad. The man he loved was so smart and reasonable, yet this attitude was self-destructive. Yeah, okay, the blonde had said countless times how his priorities were and always had been his studies, but putting them even over his health? It was irritating and it seemed like he knew and just didn’t care. All that was in Hirano’s mind was being as ready as he could be for those exams. 

“You’ve been doing this the whole week. Your body can’t possibly handle this treatment  much longer. You know…Tomorrow is sunday, you can catch some sleep today and tomorrow  you can keep studying if you want-” 

“If I want?!?!” Kagi was sort of cut off by Hirano’s sudden outburst. “Do you think I’m doing this for fun? My whole future and everything I’ve been working for in these past years depend on me scoring a high enough grade on the entrance exams next week!” Hirano hissed. He was incensed, he wasn’t being himself. 

Kagi kept silent for a bit, he limited himself to  stare at Hirano with those deep brown eyes of his. Hirano seemed as  if  he was holding his breath. He had raised his voice to Kagi, his precious roommate, and that didn’t happen often. “You are  the first person to tell me that taking breaks is something healthy, that I cannot strain my body  so that  it exceeds its limits all the time, yet that’s what you’ve been doing. All these past days and nights, it’s like there’s a magnet on your desk” the younger man said firmly. “You are  better than this, Hirano. I know that you know better than to-” 

“I’m scared” Hirano’s gaze was down, his body tensed up on the chair. He had verbalised that so fast, Kagiura even doubted if he had heard him  right. “You’re scared?” asked Kagiura to make sure he had heard correctly. “Every minute I’m not studying I feel like I’m wasting time. My head gets flooded with horrible scenarios… What if I can’t answer something I thought I knew perfectly… Should I have studied more? What if I don’t make it? What am I supposed to do then?” his voice was starting to crack.

Upon hearing that faint change of tone in Hirano’s voice, Kagi jumped out from his bed as quickly as he could and kneeled in front of Hirano to meet his gaze. He looked up at him, a silent way of saying “I’m listening to you”. Inside his mind, Kagi was fighting the urge to take his beloved blonde into his arms and console him, alas Kagi knew that, in this state, the other would only retaliate. Instead, he gently placed one of his hands on Hirano’s knee to encourage him to vent some more. 

Brows furrowed, Hirano raised his hands to his forehead, then his temples. He was extremely tense and he knew it, he was only realising this now that he didn’t remember being not tense for the last few days. “I can’t stop,” he said in a tiny voice. “I’m sorry I snapped at you… It’s just that… I feel like I’m drowning”, he stated with one hand partially covering his face. He looked at Kagiura, who was still on his knees looking at him. He didn’t need to say anything, his very expressive eyes spoke for him. Hirano was always glad for how Kagiura kept him grounded without him  knowing it. He felt as if he gave him some sort of sense of purpose and direction. He was a pillar to him. Though he still hadn’t been able to name what he felt for his junior, he was certain they were all positive things, even if he had been ignoring him these past days. He recalled what Kagi said earlier, he was right, he needed to take a break. He was burnt out, exhausted, and anxious, but seeing his roommate’s face brought him some comfort. “You’re probably not even retaining anything anymore, like, your brain is lacking nutrients” Kagiura stated as if he was a hundred percent sure that’s what was happening. Hirano chuckled. “You’re so stupid”, he teased him with a faint smile on his face. He took the hand that was resting on his knee, held it and gave it a squeeze. “Thank you, Kagi. You’re absolutely right, I should stop…that is for today at least”. Kagiura smiled and squeezed his hand back. He got up, not letting go of Hirano’s hand, “I have no doubts that you’re going to make it, Hirano-san, but you really have to get some rest. You always look very beautiful to me, but those dark circles aren't flattering around your pretty blue eyes”. “Ugh” Hirano took his hand away and hid his very much blushed face. “Okay, whatever, let’s sleep then, it is past lights out time anyway” It had been a little over a year since Kagiura confessed, and they had been through so much, but Hirano still wasn’t sure how to react when the other one blurted out his thoughts and feelings like that. But as he had told him himself once: Kagi went straight for the throat with his words and, once again, he had to be thankful for it. “I’m not gonna turn off the lights until I’m completely sure you’re tucked in your bed” Kagiura said as he stood waiting for Hirano to crawl into his bed and lay on it the same way you would stare at a pet that got caught in the middle of  mischief and got  scolded for it. “Are you gonna do it yourself, then?” The blonde immediately regretted his words. With any other person, that would’ve come off as a goofy little threat-joke; but, given the current state of his relationship with Kagiura and how the sleepy brat tended to take things literally...He had positioned himself in a dangerous situation . He cleared his throat and blushed. Again. Kagiura blushed too because the amount of times he had dreamt of taking Hirano to bed was insane. 

After some awkward seconds, the youngest said “I don’t think you should set an alarm for tomorrow. You should really sleep as much as your body needs. If I wake up first, I’ll be sure to be as quiet as possible. Oh! But I’ll wake you up if breakfast time is running out, you must  eat properly too, and breakfast is the most important meal of the day. If you want, I can get you some of the snacks I eat before training if you want to feel more energised-” at this point Kagiura realised Hirano was staring at him with a joyous look on his face, the kind gaze  that made Kagi think Hirano was also in love with him. “Right, sorry, I’ll shut up” Hirano snickered, he got into his bed, bundling up under his covers. “Thank you, Kagi… I mean it” he said as he rested  his head on the pillow. Kagiura turned off the lights.

_______

Taiga Hirano envied and admired a lot of things about his roommate, one of those things being his ability to fall asleep immediately, and virtually anywhere. He wasn’t sure how much time had passed since Kagi had turned off the lights, but he felt as if he had been shuffling around on his bed for hours. Had  it been of any worth  that Kagiura had managed to get him off the desk relatively early if he was still awake, thrashing around thinking about the exams? Oh no, here it comes again, the feeling of wasting time. He felt irate at himself. Why couldn't he just fall asleep quickly? He wished he could just switch his body off, like an electronic device. He couldn’t help himself to keep ruminating on those thoughts of worry and inadequacy… Oh! And, on top of that, he had also made poor sweet Kagi worry about him. This wasn’t good. His chest felt tight, his thoughts were rushing on his mind and felt as if they were surrounded by thorns, he couldn’t find a position where his body didn’t feel itchy. He wasn’t foolish enough to get up and start studying now, he knew he needed to rest, but this was  useless, he needed his mind to wander somewhere else. He sat up and glanced to his left towards the direction where Kagi’s bed was. He appeared to be sleeping profoundly. 

Aah, fuck it. 

“Kagi” Hirano whispered, hoping it would be enough to wake up Mr. Sleeping Beauty. He knew from experience that it hardly would be, though, so he sat at the bed of the other boy and shook him  lightly, “Kagi” he repeated .

“..hmmh?” a very dazed and sleepy Kagiura mumbled, one eye opened. “Scoot over” Hirano said with a calmness in his voice that was proportional to the knot of nerves he felt inside. It’s not like he hadn’t slept with Kagiura before, they had fallen asleep on the floor sometimes in their study sessions,  they had also leant on each other on long bus rides if they took a trip somewhere… but actually getting in his bed was… different. Hirano felt a bit guilty. Was he taking advantage of him? He knew he wouldn’t refuse. Was he being selfish? He still remembered that time when Kagi couldn’t sleep well because he was too self-conscious of sharing a room with the person he had a crush on…that was a long time ago though, and they were way past that stage. 

Also, Kagiura himself had told him he wanted him to be needy, and this was what he wanted right now. Without fully understanding what was happening, mainly because he was pretty much with one foot in reality and consciousness and the other one on Morpheus’ realm, Kagiura  squirmed towards the side of the wall, and the next thing he knew was that he had Hirano between his arms. Now he was fully awake. “Hirano-san, what happened? Are you okay?” Kagi asked, concerned. “...It's just… I can’t sleep,” Hirano answered, the sound  partially lost as he had buried his face in Kagi’s chest.  It was his way of saying “I don’t want to talk anymore”, the blonde tugged at Kagi’s pajamas and squeezed him into a hug. Kagi understood. He shifted his body a bit more so that Hirano could lay more comfortably on him… well, at least as comfortable as those miniscule  single beds would allow them. He held his beloved senior in his arms. Hirano had his head on Kagiura’s chest-shoulder-arm. One of his arms was folded awkwardly between their bodies and the other one was around his junior, holding him tightly. He could hear Kagi’s heartbeat, which he had expected to raise up, but it didn’t. Wasn’t he disrupted by the fact that his crush had just barged into his bed? Maybe this was wrong and he shouldn’t have made his way into his junior’s bed. Doing something as intimate as sharing a bed was…risky, giving he was also still not sure he felt the same way. Then again, whatever impulse made him want to sleep with him had been right, he already felt a little bit better. The night was cold, it was winter after all, and Kagiura was very, very warm. Hirano was somewhat glad these beds were so narrow, they forced him to cling extremely close to Kagi; it was his only option. Whatever thoughts that were making him feel bad about giving Kagiura mixed signals were now redirected at himself, accusing his own actions  for quite possibly turning a  blind eye on his very own feelings for his roommate. 

He had willingly approached his roommate to lay between his arms after all, and, by god, it was everything he had hoped it would be and more. After a short while, he felt Kagi’s fingers caress his hair lightly, softly, cautiously. Hirano got angry at the thought that maybe Kagi was taking this as the pointless ten second thing they used to do. He shouldn’t hesitate to touch him, for heaven’s sake! So, as a way to reassure that physical contact between them was more than okay now, Hirano snuggled more into Kagi’s chest and leaned his head into his hand as he caressed his hair,  just like when a cat wants to be petted. It was working. His head was being drained from all of the overwhelming thoughts and worries of the exams and instead, thoughts of his beloved Akira Kagiura were starting to sprout. Hirano was thinking of Kagi’s body, which was now extremely close to him, and how it barely fit in the bed, lengthwise. He was thinking about the fact that Kagi felt broader than what he looked; it was funny how the brunette was always so eager to touch him yet he was so reluctant to show off his muscles. Those muscles… Now Hirano could feel them, and it was doing things to his mind. He decided it was not the time to pay too much attention to those thoughts… not now. Kagiura’s other hand had found its way to Hirano’s back, and it was gently caressing him there too, with a small linear motion with his thumb. This felt extremely relaxing and Hirano was delighted; either he would fall asleep, which was what he much wanted and needed, or he would remain enjoying all of the sensations his roommate was making him feel, which were a bunch of fuzzy warm emotions. 

He didn’t want to think much of when he would ever get the chance to share a bed with Kagiura again, or even if he would. Perhaps going over what his feelings for Kagi actually were wasn’t the best idea now. Hirano was just grateful there was someone in his life he could depend on and lean on when he felt as if the ground wasn’t there anymore, like he was losing himself. The mere action of laying down and cuddling with Kagiura made everything else seem so inconsequential. It was just them, their bodies now very intertwined, as  Kagi had locked their legs together at some point, both of their breaths now in sync, and Kagi’s soothing heartbeat which made Hirano calm down drastically. The petting on the head stopped, and Hirano took this as a sign that his dear Kagi was definitely falling back to sleep. The older boy moved his head a bit to look at his source of bliss. Kagiura had rested his head to almost lay on top of Hirano’s, and because of the sudden movement, he got alerted and opened his eyes. Blue met brown. 

They held their gazes for a while. Kagiura appeared to be waiting for Hirano to say something, and Hirano seemed to be waiting for Kagiura to do something. 

Kagi smiled softly and asked “are you comfortable?”; his voice was low and raspy, he had bedhead and, from up this close, Hirano could see just how handsome he really, truly was. He got overwhelmed, but in a good way, because he understood the sheer amount of self-control Kagi must have been exerting right there to place his needs first. It was  like he understood everything, all at once. The raw, intense, intrinsic love Kagi felt for him, he was really feeling it now, it was like being struck by thunder. Hirano wished this sensation was eternal. If he had done it a little harder, Hirano would’ve practically headbutted Kagiura on his chest when he leant down on him again, squeezing him tight. “Very much so” Hirano answered, but again his voice was partially lost in the fabric of Kagiura’s hoodie. He felt Kagi also snug him closer, take a deep breath and then he was pretty sure he felt faint kisses on the top of his head. He  probably didn’t mind it at this time, all this cuddling was the perfect sleeping pill after all. 

___

When he opened his eyes, Hirano felt plenty confused: he saw his own bed, but he wasn’t on it. “Oh my god, did I die out of stress? Am I a spirit now?” He began to freak out, but was eventually distracted by how overly warm his back felt, and how his duvet felt heavier than usual. It felt as if it was almost wrapped around him… and it also smelt a lot like his roommate. Oh. Right.

They must have shifted during the night (as one normally does) because now Kagiura was spooning Hirano, who needed a few seconds after waking up to finish the puzzle on his mind and remember all that had happened last night. Carefully, as to not wake the other up, who, unsurprisingly, was still asleep, Hirano reached out for the alarm clock Kagi kept on the headrest of his bed, the one he had gifted him on his past birthday. It was a little past 9 a.m. Way later than the time they usually got up, but still not too late to have breakfast. Hirano sat up on the bed and woke Kagi up. After all, if they weren’t out of the room soon, Hanzawa was probably going to knock on their door out of suspicion and, for once, he would’ve been right. 

With a hand lightly shaking Kagiura’s torso, the blonde called for his junior’s name in a soft voice. When Kagiura opened his eyes, he was greeted with a view so dazzling he also thought  he had died and gone to heaven: the morning sun rays were leaking from their window, and the ones that didn’t reach him directly, were being blocked by Hirano, with his golden hair, his fair skin, his shining blue eyes, the morning sun creating a halo around his figure. His brain malfunctioned and, all he managed to say after some babbling, was “...what?” 

Hirano giggled, Kagi genuinely seemed absent-minded. “Don’t you “what” me, get up!” he said as he gave a quick spank to Kagi’s hip. Kagiura was sure he was now dead because there was no way Hirano just did that; but on the other hand, he was happy, because Hirano had a completely different look on his face: he looked rested, refreshed, lively. 

“Good morning, Hirano-san” Kagi finally managed to say, and smiled.

[twilightmalachite]

Christmas Live - Prologue

Author: Akira

Characters: Yuzuru, Anzu

Translator: Mika Enstars

JP Proofer: 310mc

EN Proofer: ryuseipuka

"Hm, “meow ♪”? Is that your impression of a cat?"

[Read on my blog for the best viewing experience with Oi~ssu ♪]

Season: Winter

Location: Yumenosaki Corridors

Yuzuru: …Sigh. I’m sorry, could you please repeat yourself?

Oh, no, it’s not that I couldn’t hear you the first time. I don’t mean to guilt you, but could you please speak a little more clearly?

I’m here to prioritize assessing the situation correctly, rather than to criticize you. …What has happened, are you crying?

You’ll have to excuse me, I cannot take your feelings into consideration at this time.

I’m terribly sorry, but, please do tell me what led up to this. I’ll handle it from here on.

Hm. What an inconvenience; I thought you had assured me you would have that matter taken care of.

If that comes to a stop, then this entire thing will come to a standstill.

What trouble. Biting off more than you can chew only reveals your inadequacy.

You should prove your usefulness not with your words, but with your actions, and your results.

Yes. Do not worry, allow me to take care of it. You should give your face a quick rinse.

I’ll contact you again later, so… Alright, do excuse me.

… …

Yuzuru: …How vulgar.[1] Well, I can understand how he feels.

Oya, Anzu-san. It’s not in very good taste to eavesdrop, you know.

No, there isn’t any serious trouble. No need for the producer to go through the hassle of interfering.

You’re busy with your own business after all, are you not?

Fufu. It is indeed December, the end of the year.

Soon it will be Christmas… The academy has plans to hold the large-scale event we know as StarFes.

And as expected, the student council appears to be short on hands, and I have been requested to assist with preparations.

I do not wish to be so meddlesome…

However, the student council is one of the young master’s places to be. It is my duty as a butler to support him, as well.

Furthermore, the results I achieve will also affect the young master’s evaluation.

And so, I am doing the best to my ability. I am having quite the tough time, though….

It’s one issue after another, you see, and I’m extremely busy. I’d welcome even the help of a cat.[2]

Hm, “meow ♪”? Is that your impression of a cat?

You act quite unusually sometimes, don’t you, Anzu-san. Regardless, as I’ve said… I’m sure that you have your own work to complete.

So please, prioritize that.

I understand exactly how you feel. Labor is a blessing—No, it is life itself. It devastates me to have to take a break for the New Year holiday season.

Fufu. That being said, it is a season where you can easily fall sick… Please take care of yourself, Anzu-san.

I do not have the time for a long conversation now, so do excuse me.

Oh. I’m sorry, but please do not tug at the hem of my uniform. You resemble a lost child. What can I do for you?

Hm. So… It’s a rare occurrence, but you truly are free today, Anzu-san?

Nobody will give you any work, because they’re all concerned about you? Well, you have been working a lot, Anzu-san… It wouldn’t be good if you were to collapse from overexertion.

Make good use of everyone’s concern for you, and please rest. How about finding a hobby, or joining a club?

That is what I do on my days off, too.

I strengthen my mind with the archery club, and do careful and meticulous cleaning around the mansion I normally am not able to get to…

Do you have any hobbies, Anzu-san?

Hm. You still insist on some kind of work? “Please don’t reduce my hours, boss!”…? Fufu, that’s a very funny joke. ♪

As you wish. I just can’t say no when I’m pleaded to so lovingly like that.

Hm… May I ask you to do a bit of shopping for me, then?

An errand. Basically; there are some trivial things I need.

The quantity doesn’t justify ordering from a vendor and getting it delivered, but it is a hassle to do the shopping oneself.

It would be a massive help if you could do this errand for me, Anzu-san.

Just a moment, please. Allow me to make a list of the items we need purchased. Correction fluid, a Bible, chocolate bonbons… Hm, what is it?

You’d like me to draw you a picture? No need to be so mean; you know that I possess no artistic talent.

Umm, well then… A turkey, then, a Christmas tradition.

The turkey’s saying, “Thank you for doing the shopping, Anzu-chan! ♪” How’s this?

Fufu. I am glad that you like it.

Thank you very much. I had been overwhelmed with busyness up until some moments ago, but…

I feel somewhat more at peace now. Thanks to you, Anzu-san. ♪

Anyhow. For this upcoming year’s end…

Let us end it meaningfully, and without any regrets. Although I’m sure you know that well, Anzu-san…

Ah, right, yes… The items I need for this errand aren’t ones necessarily needed right away.

So please do take your time strolling around town as you shop.

It is a delight simply to wander around with all the beautiful lights put up everywhere. …It’s a tad early, but nevertheless, Merry Christmas. ♪

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The word here used is zokubutsu (俗物), the same word Shu often uses to describe Mika (and sometimes other people as well).

A japanese idiom, neko no te mo karitai (猫の手も借りたい) used to describe extreme business. Translated literally here so Anzu’s cute way of offering to help makes sense!

[resurrection-of-soul]

Flashback | PSYCHOBREAK 8

Writer: Akira (日日日)

Characters: Rei, Koga

Rei: Nnnn~ …… Man, I'm seriously weak to bein' relied on like that. Haha. I'm ne~ver gonna make a complete recovery, huh? Maybe it's incurable.

[ For the best viewing experience, please read directly on my blog! ♪ ]

Rei: Alright, enough about that. So, what do ya wanna do? Since nothing you've done so far is makin' any difference, are ya just gonna leave those "vampires" be?

Koga: No. Hasumi-senpai made it so that you gotta submit an application to the student council in order to get a unit officially recognized, n' students who ain't in an official unit ain't allowed in this live house. I don't really get the details, but basically, anyone caught breakin' the rules'll incur some kinda penalty. 'Course, those "vampire" guys're just ignorin' it and doin' whate~ever they want. So we're gonna take 'em all down in a DreFes. Or at least, that's what Hasumi-senpai said. That's why I was out here practicin' like this.

Rei: A DreFes, huh… That's that battle of the bands type thing, yeah? When ya actually look into the mechanism behind it all, there ain't nothin' dream-like 'bout it, despite the name.

Koga: I don't get the point, honestly. Even if we get this thing set up n' win it, so what? I mean, the guys who go to our school're all rotten. Are guys like that seriously gonna reflect on their loss n' be all, "From now on, we'll work hard to become proper idols!"?

Rei: Yeeeeah, no chance a' that. A rottin' corpse can't e~ever go back to bein' a livin', breathin' person. But that DreFes thing has been incorporated into the school rules. I looked over it real quick, n' as far as I can tell, if ya keep losin' over n' over, the school's gonna start treatin' ya as a failure. Your grades'll keep droppin' with every loss, until eventually you'll be faced with suspension, and finally expulsion, as you'll be deemed unsuitable t' be a student at Yumenosaki. That's the excuse Hasumi-bou plans on usin' to banish the delinquents — those "vampires" — from our school.

Koga: Nn~, that sounds like a pain in the ass…. If the goal's just to drive 'em out, ain't the fact they're delinquents who're causin' all sortsa trouble already reason enough to kick 'em out? Why go outta the way to set up a live showdown?

Rei: A high percentage a' the students attendin' Yumenosaki, especially those in the idol course, come from well-off families. Includin' lil' ol' me, a' course. That's why the school keeps turnin' a blind eye to student misconduct. In return, these students provide the rapidly deterioratin' Yumenosaki the essential nutrient it needs to keep itself alive in this declinin' industry — money.

Rei: No matter how troublesome or unruly these students may be, they can't just toss 'em aside. Therein lies Yumenosaki's structural flaw. Even if she's clearly fallen sick from all the rot, ya can't just excise the heart. In fact, it's just the opposite — the school's been protectin' the students by desperately coverin' up their misdeeds. That's why those "vampires" are able to continue enjoyin' their seemingly carefree youth. How's that for an explanation, huh? Pretty revoltin', ain't it?

Koga: The hell's with that… Does having money automatically make you great? Adults are always like this. Is money more important than justice? There are people cryin' cause those delinquents won't leave 'em alone, y'know. There're people sufferin', even though they've done nothing wrong. Why do the troublemakers get to laugh, while the ones doing good end up in tears? Don't'cha think that's messed up?

Rei: Yeah. I'm not enough of a senile old man to just accept that's how the world works. If possible, I'd like to lend bouzu a hand with his delinquent subjugation plan.

Koga: So then! You should come perform at the live too! With you on our side, it'll be like having the strength of a hundred people! Let's thoroughly! Trounce those delinquents! With our music!

Rei: Nnnn~ …… Man, I'm seriously weak to bein' relied on like that.

Rei: Haha. I'm ne~ver gonna make a complete recovery, huh? Maybe it's incurable.

Koga: Y-you've got some kinda illness, Sakuma-senpai? Then, shouldn't'cha avoid pushin' yerself too hard…?

Rei: It's okay, no worries! It's mostly a psychological problem, so. Let's do it. Show me to the monk. Lil' ol' me'll lend a hand~ I'll get on stage.

Koga: Ohhh! Awesome~! With Sakuma-senpai on our side, there's no way we'll lose ♪

Rei: However, I have one condition. I'm the kinda guy who never breaks my promises, so I can't be on the same side as Hasumi-bou, who lost miserably to me in the "Dead Man's Live." Those were the terms of our competition, y'see. So I can't stand on stage as his ally. If I'm to make an appearance, it'll have to be as a member of a different unit from the one he's in. Long story short: You've gotta choose, Oogami Koga-kun. Are ya gonna stand on stage with him, or with me?

Koga: W-wait, that's… Now's not the time t' be actin' stubborn. We should work together to get rid of the delinquents—

Rei: No, that's no good. This ain't some kinda fairytale with a convenient conclusion. I absolutely will not break a promise. Not anymore.¹ We made a deal — one I promised to honor — and he lost. We've parted ways, and our paths will never cross again. Never again will we stand together on stage, shoulder to shoulder, in pursuit of the same goal.

Koga: ………

Rei: (We did, though! We've stood together on the same stage countless times! My apologies for being so presumptuous back then…!)

Koga: (That's true n' all, but… Back then, I ended up choosin' to get on stage with you.)

Rei: (It rather felt as though Hasumi-kun bequeathed the victory unto me. Given his serious nature, he would not break a promise…) (He began saying things like, "Since I already formed another unit, "Akatsuki," I cannot simultaneously belong to another unit.") (And thus, he ultimately assumed a role behind the scenes, covertly supporting us as we fought the delinquents on the frontlines.)

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The broken promise in question is Rei's promise never to leave Ritsu, which he actually breaks twice — once pre-canon, and then again during the war. Details are scattered throughout several of Rei and Ritsu's ! era stories rather than there being one particular place to look for reference, but it's featured fairly prominently in Devils.

[yue-muffin]

only thing i hate about period cdramas is the voice acting. it seems that you hear the same 10 voices across all dramas, sometimes the voice doesn't even suit the character or it doesn't match the intonation of the actor/actress properly. it makes sense that you might not want to record on scene, and it's not like dramas from other countries don't also dub over scenes where necessary. and you can't use accent and standard mandarin as an excuse, because it's not like actors and actresses overseas don't study regional and other types of accents for their characters which differs from their usual way of speaking. case in point: any british actor/actress using an american accent, which is so different down to how the vowels sound. some take it further and even do their interpretation of a real historical person's voice which big respect i have no idea how they do it.

although not all the dialects and languages in china are mutually intelligible, everyone studies mandarin and if you hear these actors/actresses speak in interviews, they speak standard mandarin. if they don't speak clearly enough, then imo that's not impossible to fix on their end. hell, i've gone to speech therapy as an adult for the same reason that i didn't pronounce certain sounds properly and need to for my job. (which obviously I never realized until someone pointed it out. honestly i still don't hear it myself, but i can say it properly now)

and if you're going to dub everyone, then expand your voice acting industry and train more people so there isn't such a small pool to choose from. like, shit, if you also watch donghuas and listen to audio dramas, you literally hear the same 10 people everywhere.

i mean, japan has a thriving voice acting industry, and while there are popular or prolific VAs, you don't get that 'same face syndrome' effect. (the only va i've ever noticed is legitimately EVERYWHERE is akira ishida lol. he's good. he's super good at a certain vibe a lot of his characters give off. he's just got a very distinctive voice and he's been in the industry for a long time, and has played in lots of major and minor roles).

...no i was not surprised when i heard his voice in genshin impact. like i said. everywhere. lol.

[causeitsagame]

Ishimondo as spies tasked with finding each other?

Ahahaha this was fun. The plot took me in a little different direction than your prompt (they're tasked to work together, instead), but it was fun to just let that flow.

-----

"Yeah, I heard you," yawned Mondo Owada, and scratched behind his ear.

The woman on the other end of the line gave a tight, annoyed sigh. "You should treat this arrangement with more gravity. Should we decide to cancel it, you'll be right back in prison."

"Stop bustin' my balls, man," Mondo grumbled into his phone as he walked toward a cluster of men. "I said I fuckin' heard you, and you'll get it when you get it." The group sized him up as he approached. Apparently, he passed whatever test they'd been applying, and they let him through rather than challenge his presence.

"Excuse me?" the woman sputtered. "If you want to have me report to your superior right now, then I'll—"

As soon as he was safely in an alleyway and away from any prying eyes, Mondo gripped his phone tighter and hissed into it. "Okay, now there aren't any damn guys listening in. You know where you sent me, right? You think I'm gonna be able to say 'sure, boss!' and salute the phone? Screw your fuckin' head on straight!"

The woman's silence somehow deepened.

Mondo shrugged. "Guess I shouldn't have added that last bit."

"Very well," she gritted out. "We will keep the unique circumstances of this mission in mind, and contact you only when we must."

"And send a text instead of calling, so I can answer you whenever."

"Hmmm." She hung up without an actual goodbye, and Mondo snorted at the phone before jamming it into his pocket.

He'd been offered a straightforward arrangement by her government agency: in exchange for getting out of prison a hell of a lot earlier than he'd otherwise see, Mondo would report on a gang's activities.

Phrased like that, he'd turned them down instantly. Mondo Owada wasn't a fucking snitch.

The agency tried again, with more of an explanation. This gang wasn't a comparatively harmless one, like the one he'd gotten put away for. The gang targeted for surveillance didn't trade in mere larceny or assault. No: they were probably a front for an international bioterrorism group, and any ruckus they deliberately caused would be to draw police support away from the research labs of interest.

Fucking great!

Seriously, that was really fucking great. Just what Mondo wanted to fucking hear: if he wanted to get out of jail, he'd be spying on a bunch of murderous pricks trying to end the fucking world, from the sound of it. And he couldn't not spy on them once he'd heard what was actually going on, because otherwise, they'd end the fucking world!

Or something.

Maybe they'd just kill a lot of people.

Pain in the goddamn ass, either way, and the agency that was supposedly overseeing him was clearly in over their heads. Sighing, Mondo checked his hair, then went back out into the thick of things. Before he got access to any of the good intel, he'd need to make some friends.

Two nights later, a tattooed gangster with a cueball of a shaved head elbowed Mondo. "Check it out," he chuckled, and pointed down the sidewalk.

Mondo stared blankly at the indicated man. The stranger was also trying to make friends with the gangsters around him, and doing a goddamn fuckin' awful job of it. His hair was cropped short, which neatly featured his bold, intense features and near-unblinking stare. He looked fit enough to swing a bat or crowbar, too. Pity he'd covered those muscles with some sort of… Mondo didn't even know what. Some sort of Akira cosplay from the fuckin' 1980s.

"Hello!" said the stranger as he walked up to Mondo. "I'm working on introducing myself!"

The tattooed gangster chuckled and shooed him away. "It's past your bedtime, kid."

"I assure you, I am no 'kid!' I have reached the age of legal majority!"

For fuck's sake. Mondo ran a hand across his face. If he'd been hired to save lives, then he'd better start with this idiot before he got his face caved in. "I'll go dump him somewhere."

"Dump?" the man asked with concern, but he let himself be led.

As they rounded a corner and entered an alley, Mondo gestured to its far end. "I don't know how you ended up here, bro, but this place clearly ain't for you. Head off before you make an enemy you can't manage."

"Don't be concerned, Mondo. I am fully apprised of the situation!" The man considered things, and cheerfully added, "Bro!"

"That's… huh?" Mondo blinked at him. He didn't think he was known by enough of the gang to have his name shared with a newcomer, yet. "How do you know my name?"

"Kiyotaka Ishimaru," the man replied. "You may refer to me as Taka."

"Whatever. Who the fuck are you, and why should I give a shit?"

Taka's voice dropped in pitch and volume, but even at a whisper, he still seemed somehow boisterous. "Your supervisor agreed that communicating over the phone was risky. I am a highly decorated agency member and I've come to be your direct backup."

Mondo stared, hoping that he'd somehow misheard. No such luck. "You're my backup?" he demanded, and looked the visibly out-of-place man over. "Fuck that!"

Taka straightened. "I have overseen protocol for seventeen embassy surveillance missions, and have avoided nearly as many diplomatic crises! And as you can see, I've even pieced together an authentic gang uniform!"

"Then head back to the office, pencil pusher. You don't have the first idea how to behave, here."

For the first time, Taka looked genuinely offended. "I have thoroughly researched this setting. I even developed a behavioral flowchart with my superiors. It balances the law, anthropological group norms, and the importance of the mission's desired outcome."

"Fucking hell," Mondo grimaced.

"Hey. Owada. Haven't you dumped him off somewhere, yet?"

Grumbling, Mondo turned to the bald gangster they'd left behind. "Guy just won't shut up. I'll be back in a second." Despite his suggestion, the man kept stumbling into the alley after them both. Hostility radiated from him, and clear intoxication didn't help.

"No need to wait." The man took a step closer, and jabbed a finger into Taka's chest hard enough to leave a bruise. "Fuck off, kid, or—"

Taka grabbed the man's wrist in an overhand grip, rotated it backward, and applied enough pressure to the joint to make the man yelp in pain. "You seem to be under the misapprehension that I need your approval!"

Mondo blinked. Well. The guy was dumb, but he had balls.

Once released, the gangster stared at him with disbelief. "What the fuck did you just pull?" he demanded, and pulled his fist back to send a haymaker right through Taka's nose.

The agency newcomer didn't seem to be a trained fighter, but Mondo had guessed correctly that Taka had some real athleticism under his ridiculous outfit. He easily dodged the drunk man's punch, and stepped aside to let him go stumbling headfirst into a brick wall.

"I wouldn't normally engage in any sort of assault, even indirect," Taka whispered to Mondo. "But the agency assured me that I needed to display some physical capacity to gain group approval. And that it would be worth it, given the stakes of this operation."

Despite himself, Mondo couldn't help but laugh. "The fuck is up with you, bro?"

"We're partners!" Taka cheerfully said, still too quiet for baldie to hear. "And I assure you, I have studied criminal infiltration thoroughly. I will live up to this vital task!"

"Fuckin' hell," Mondo said again, but this time, he chuckled. "Whatever, bro. You'd better not get in my way."

Returning to jail would probably be easier. But this, at least, should be entertaining.

[nie7027]

Because I don't know if ill ever get to write this ai and I don't want this scene to be lost to be never read (especially because this occurs until a long way into the story) you get this brief scene of my all persona au:

"There will be a bathroom in your room where you can clean yourself if you so wish" Kirijo started saying to the man.

The man, Tatsuya, turned to her and if Goro thought Akiras face had been impossible to read those first months after they had met it was nothing compared to this.

Tatsuyas face was rigid like a stone as he nodded. It was as if after all these years the man's face had forgotten how to make the simplest of microexpressions.

"But before you go I need to ask, what can you tell us about this Philemon?", Kirijo asked, as always down to bussines.

"I punched him in the face. He trapped me in a post apocalyptic dimension crowded with shadows", the man said impassive. His voice, as his face, not showing a single trace of any kind inflexion despite the severity of his words.

The group exchanged glances between each other waiting for the man to elaborate. He seemed to think it wasn't necessary so he didn't.

After a long moment of waiting when it became obvious the man wasnt going to say anything else Kirijo spoke again

"Is... that so?" The CEO continued raising an eyebrow, trying to salvage what was clearly turning to be an unsalvageable situation. “Dont you have anything else to say?”

Tatsuyas stared back at her in what Goro guessed was his way of carefully thinking over through his next words.

"He's a little bitch", was all he added before leaving the room effectively leaving them all in stunned silence.

“Err...You must excuse him,” Aki- Maki (Godammit Goro get it through your thick head already) said apologetically, "Tatsuya-kun has never been good with words"

'No shit Sherlock', Goro thought to himself biting the insides oh his cheek to keep himself from voicing his thoughts.

[tricksheart]

FISHING

It's one of his favorite sports of all time besides baseball and swimming, so he dresses the part, even to the extreme. Much to other's chagrin like Goro Akechi. But he can't help but be passionate about something that makes him happy and can invite others to join him.

Ryuji and Kawakami are the biggest examples, but others can join in with him too if they wish to do so, like Yu Narukami for example. Or crossover characters like Noctis from Final Fantasy XV. And if you need help casting lines or finding good spots to actually catch something, he's always ready to give out a helping hand.

Akira wants the experience to be a good one. He doesn't like when people turn down his invites and would probably sulk for a week or two at most, clearly upset. He'll get over the feeling eventually but just don't talk to him those two weeks. Unless he knows you are scared of fish or the water in general in which Akira totally understands. The excuse of it being boring doesn't work on him however. He won't take that shit lying down at all.

[aimhleas]

"My husband and my son are so stubborn, they fought often when Akira was growing up but they always made up in the end. I understand why it was necessary for Akira to get out of the house when the argument started, but now he's just running away from his issues with his father. I don't want him to think that running away from something uncomfortable is always an option, and if there's any hope of him and his father getting back on good terms, he needs to come home now."

"Excuse me if I come off as rude but is putting them together again a good idea when there is still hostility? Akira-kun has only told me some of what has gone on so I don't know many of the details but there is clearly still a frustration there. Putting the two of them together when Akira-kun has no chance to leave could make things worse especially if they are both just as stubborn as one another. If you would like, I could allow that you and your husband come here to speak with him together. Akira-kun feels safe here, or so he tells me, and perhaps being in an environment that both feel they have to be respectable in could have them both properly discuss things."

[leaderoffestivals]

Myriad of Colours and Flowers: Ch 5

Kanata: Eh, is it about Mikejima? Are you searching for that, Anzu-san?

Season: Autumn Writer: Akira Character: Kanata, Souma EN Proofing: @ryuseipuka, blake Credit: kirinece

<Time has passed to the end of October, in the present day, immediately after the Antique Market. A park on the grounds of ES, known as the ‘Garden’.>

Kanata: Pshuu pshuu pshuu~ ♪  Pshuu pshuu pshuu~ ♪

(Aaah~ this is such a great ‘feeling’! I have been ‘making do’ with this ‘mist sprayer’ because it is about to turn into the ‘season’ where I will catch a ‘cold’ if I go ‘bathing in the water’—)

Kanata:  (And thanks to this ‘modern weapon’, all of the ‘flowers’ here are blooming ‘beautifully’ too~ ♪ Fufufu~ You guys ‘love’ the ‘water’ too, right~?)

All you little ‘flower’ friends here, please keep on ‘growing’ strong and beautiful, alright~? 

Because, as a ‘reward’ for ‘taking care’ of all of you, I will receive the ‘privilege’ of being able to ‘puka, puka’ here!

… …Hmm? Ehhh~, Anzu-san! Good afternoon~ ♪

Oh my… Did something bad happen? Your ‘face’ is so ‘scary’... … Are you having some kind of ‘problem’~?

Eh, is it about Mikejima? Are you searching for that, Anzu-san?

Geez~! Has that ‘rogue’ gone and done something again? What a troublesome guy, huuuh~? I am going to have to deliver a ‘good, long lecture’ later, I see? 

Even though I know for certain that one will just ignore every single ‘word I say’.

To think that he used to be such a ‘docile’ and ‘obedient child’ back in the day… … Just where did the ‘upbringing’ go wrong, I wonder?

Eh~? There is no ‘need’ for that—you say? It will not have any ‘meaning’ if someone delivers it on your behalf? This is something you have to do yourself, or else it will be ‘pointless’?

What do you mean? Honestly, what is going on~, Anzu-san? It is unusual for you to have such a troubled ‘expression’, you know… …? 

Souma: OIII! IS SHINKAI-DONO PRESENT IN THIS PLACE~!?

Kanata: Hyaa~!? What is going on, Souma? What are you making such a big splash for~? In other ‘religions’, it is said that ‘God’ is pleased with a ‘peaceful silence’, you know?

I must say, though. It is pretty ‘lively’ here ‘today’, isn’t it? 

Souma: I apologise sincerely for having caused an unwelcome disturbance! As a punishment for having interrupted Shinkai-dono’s treasured leisure time, you are welcome to submerge me under the water to your heart’s content! (1) I am ready! Please, go ahead!

Kanata: Sigh~ If you are the one telling me to ‘go ahead’ and do that to you…

I have wanted to say this for a ‘long time’: If you give a ‘spanking’ to someone who wishes to be ‘spanked’, it is no longer a ‘punishment’ at all. 

When you think about it like that, you are ‘invincible’, aren’t you, Souma… … What a troublesome child…

Souma: Hmm? I do not quite understand, but you complimented me just now, did you not, Shinkai-dono? Fufu! I am over the moon with joy to hear that!

Kanata: Yes, yes. Good boy~ good boy~... …

Getting back to the matter at hand, are you here on some kind of ‘business’? Are you searching for Mikejima’s whereabouts, like Anzu-san here?

Souma: Aa~ I see clearly now that Anzu-dono is present too! You had been eclipsed by Shinkai-dono’s large shadow, I hope you will excuse my impudence for not having greeted you earlier ♪

However—regarding Mikejima-dono? Is that esteemed person involved in any pressing matters this time? 

Kanata: No~ I am not the one to ask. I am completely in the dark about whatever is going on there~.  

Souma: Hmmm… …? I seem to have intruded at an inopportune moment, but I come bearing matters of great urgency too!

Shinkai-dono, are you aware of any unnatural or bizarre phenomena taking place on Yumenosaki’s campus recently? 

Kanata: Eh? Unnatural phenomena… …? I would not be aware of any incidents like that happening in ‘Yumenosaki’. I have already ‘graduated’ from that place, you know~?

Anzu-san, do you know anything about it?

Souma: Hmmm. From the looks of it, Anzu-dono does appear to have heard some rumours about it.

That is right. Recently, there has been an increase in the number of sightings of phantoms and spirits, as well as reports of mysterious noises emanating from wholly deserted areas, and other such classic ghostly occurrences.  

Kanata: Hm~? I think Nacchan would probably know ‘something’ about that, don't you? Hasn’t that child always adored ‘showy spectacles’ like those… …?

Souma: ‘Nacchan’? You are referring to Sakasaki-dono, correct? I guess it is indeed probable for that young sir to have committed pranks like these for the pure fun of it… …?

However, if that were the case, is it probable that Sakasaki-dono would have gone on to steal my prized sword, too? 

Kanata: Eh~, your sword? Has it been stolen, Souma? 

Souma: Yes. If not stolen, then it has disappeared by some unnatural means.

I do not know if Shinkai-dono is aware of this, but I caused a little bit of an uproar the other day. (2)

I felt deeply remorseful for having excited the student body to such an extent, so I have been putting my sword away in the gymnasium’s storeroom during my lessons.

Kanata: Why did you choose to keep it in the ‘gymnasium’s storeroom’, of all places? I do not like to think of the possibility that a ‘sword’ might be used during ‘P.E.’ lessons. 

Souma: I had taken precautions to secure it in a locked box so no one would be able to lay a finger on it without my leave, of course.

However, the lock has been disengaged without my knowledge somehow, and the sword gone missing from inside the box. 

Kanata: That is, well, ‘very terrible’, isn’t it… …?

Souma: Yes. It would cause dire problems indeed if some cold-blooded knave had misappropriated the sword, intending to go about committing street slashings and the like.

Kanata: I am sure that is the same ‘anxiety’ that everyone feels whenever they see Souma waving his ‘sword’ around, you know?

Souma: No. I am not a slasher, nor anything close to one. I have always used my discretion whenever I draw my sword. 

Mu? What is that look on your face, Anzu-dono? You are imagining “the sword being used to roast yams and the like”... …—you say? Y—You are deliberately putting on an act of thinking something like that, are you not, Anzu-dono!

Be that as it may! That sword is my most treasured possession and it is imperative that I get it back by any means necessary!

Kanata: That certainly is true, but then, why did you come here looking for me? Could it be you actually suspect me of having taken it?

Or were you ‘hoping’ that I would divine its location with some ‘God’-like ‘omniscience’?

If you are wishing to ‘seek a lost item’, please go consult a ‘fortune teller’ like Nacchan, okay?

Souma: No. There was something left behind in the box in which the sword was kept, which bothers me greatly. 

Kanata: Something that bothers you greatly… …?

Souma: Yes. The inside of the box was entirely packed to the brim with strange flower petals.

Kanata: ‘Flower petals’… …?

—————-To be continued——————-

Chapter 4 | Chapter 6

Translator’s Notes:

Translator’s Notes:

Callback to (!) era Quarrel Fest event.

Souma’s ‘little bit of an uproar’ was probably from his Scout Story ‘One-Man Army’. Student Council President Mao sparked it off by informing Souma that he was scaring the first-year students with his sword, and so wanted Souma to hand the sword over during lesson time for safe-keeping. Souma refused point-blank and ran away like his life depended on it. He bumped into Subaru, who jumped in immediately to help Souma defend his sword from Mao / StuCo. They escalated it by barricading themselves in a classroom to keep Mao out, creating a siege situation, and all the YNS 2nd and 3rd years showed up to join in the fun / see what the fuss was about. In the end though, Souma was permitted to keep his sword by his side, cos after demonstrating his skill with the sword in a solo live (the titular “One-Man Army”), Mao recognised that the sword was part of what made Souma, well, Souma; and as a fellow idol, Mao could not confiscate that integral part of his identity away. So, it is not certain if this uproar was really the one that prompted Souma to start keeping his sword in the gym. 

If there is any feedback, please DM me. 

[sunaswife]

Summary: It’s been five years since you’ve seen your ex, Rin. He’s still not over you and you’re not over him. When he finds out you have children he thought he didn’t have a chance. Then he finds out they’re his? All of a sudden you’re teaching Suna how to be a single dad.

🔪: hi I’m sorry for not updating and it’s been a little over a month but shit happened and I had no motivation! I am doing my best (•̀ᴗ•́)و

Warnings: Fluff, angst I guess, drama, and cuteness twin overload

Previously Up Next Masterlist

Chapter fifteen

“No Rin.” “Please.” “No Rin.” “But babeeeee.” Suna whined, he held out his EJP jersey in his hands. “Fine just this once, I don’t want anyone coming in.” You said and he nodded, you turned around and began to take off your sleeping shirt and Rin pouted, “Babe gimme a show.” He whined once more. You turned with your chest covered and threw your sleeping shirt which landed perfectly on his head.

You put on the cold jersey and saw how it still looked like a dress even though you have gained so much weight. Probably because Rin has gained so much muscle. You turned to face him and his mouth stayed hung open, you giggled and neared him. You rested your hands on his thighs and gave his cheek a small peck. “You okay there?” You asked. His arms wrapped around you and he lifted you on the bed like a rag doll. “Why” kiss “are you” kiss “so” kiss “beautiful?” Kiss.

“Stop being so cute then my heart can’t contain it.” You scolded as you brushed your fingers through his short hair. “Mommy...daddy?” You both heard behind the door, the doorknob slowly twists and you push Rin away, he falls off the bed and lands on the floor, right on his ass. The door opens and you see Rini there, “What’s wrong?” You asked him, “My tooth.” He said. “What about your—oh he’s bleeding—“ Rin said. “Take him to the bathroom and rinse his mouth, I’ll check out his mouth after I change.” You told Rin and he nodded. He carried Rini to your bathroom and helped him rinse his mouth. You quickly changed out of his jersey and put on the shirt from before. “Alright lemme see.” You said as you walked in. Rini was sitting on the counter with his mouth opened, sure enough he had a loose tooth and was too afraid to pull it out. There was nothing you can do but wait for it to fall off by itself, you wouldn’t dare to traumatize him by pulling it out yourself.

You carried the boy back to his room and saw Chewy sleeping on Akira’s bed. He woke up due to the noise and sensed Rini’s slight discomfort over his loose tooth. He carefully jumped off and yawned. With ease he climbed on Rini’s bed and cuddled with him. You tucked them both in and kissing Rini’s head goodnight you made your way out to an annoyed looking Rin watching TV. His arms are crossed over his chest and you can clearly see his flexed muscles. You both were about to go to sleep so it didn’t make sense for him to start watching TV. “Aren’t you going to bed?” You tilted your head.

“Not anymore.” He replied a little coldly. “What’s wrong?” You asked with a small pout, “Nothing..” he replied, you sighed and sat next to him on the couch, “doesn’t seem like nothing, did I do something?” You asked but he stayed quiet. “Rin we gotta have communication, if you don’t tell me what I did wrong then I can’t fix it.” You said. “Why are you so hesitant to let people know we’re together? Are you ashamed of me? Is that it? Why do we have to hide our relationship from our own children.” He asked and it finally clicked, “I told you I’m just a little hesitant but I realized now that I shouldn’t have to hide our relationship. I’m sorry now I seem like such a big jerk.” You sighed and you laced your fingers with his. “I get that you’re hesitant but maybe we should at least tell our kids and then slowly tell our friends? You’ll be surprised by the number of messages I get from the twins asking if I made a move yet.” He said and you couldn’t help but chuckle.

“Okay, we’ll tell the kids.”

“Bye I’m off!” Rin said at the front of the door, the kids automatically stopped what they were doing and ran to see their dad off. You followed behind them and Jamie yelled out her farewell since she was on bed rest. The kids hugged their dad and said their goodbyes and you waited to give him a kiss on the cheek and then expect to get bombarded with questions by the twins. You weren’t expecting him to hold your face and kiss your lips in a deep and loving way. You heard gasps and began smacking Rin’s arm because you couldn’t breath and he wouldn’t let you go. He finally pulled away and you punched him and called him a jerk, immediately the kids began asking questions and running around you as Rin laughed and waltzed to his car.

They couldn’t help but notice your dumb smile.

So this is love?

They wondered and smiled in amazement. You realized it was quiet and you looked down to see the kids staring, your cheeks flushed up. “Mama you’re in deep huh?” Akira asked, “Akira how do you know what that even means?” You asked, “Aunt Jamie.” She smiled. “Jamie I swear to god.” You growled as you made your way to the living room. She was sleeping with her hand over her baby bump. You sighed and put a light blanket over her. “Aunt Jamie is resting so don’t make too much noise, it’s hard for her to sleep with the baby inside since they won’t stop kicking.” You told the kids and they nodded.

“Humpty dumpty had a great fa—“ you were interrupted when your phone rang. Akira was asleep already in her crib but Rini couldn’t sleep so you tried reading so some books to him that your aunt donated. “Hello?” You answered without checking the caller ID, “Y/N..” you heard Jamie’s wobbly voice and you immediately sat up on your futon. “What’s wrong?” You asked, “H-he hit me a-again...” she stuttered. “Where are you?” You asked, voice filled with concern “I’m at home but he left with his buddies to go drink again..” she sniffled. “I’m on my way.” You said and she hung up, you made her promise to call the cops in case he came back. You grabbed the baby carriers and carefully placed Akira in, you were glad she was still asleep. “Come on Rini, let’s go see aunt Jamie okay?” You asked and he giggled. You exited your apartment with a carrier in each hand, their diaper bag, your wallet inside their bag, and a metal baseball bat that Tobio gave as a safety gift.

You drove past your crappy neighborhood and eventually entered Jamie’s nice and fancy neighborhood. You passed a fancy car after another fancy car but your heart almost fell out of your butt when you saw his car. You went into the drive way and quietly pulled the garbage can behind his car in case he made a getaway. You were tired of this sorry excuse of a man hurting Jamie and you were going to do whatever it takes to make sure he’s locked behind bars. You left your babies inside the car, you wouldn’t do this at all but it was nighttime and nobody was around. You locked the car and walked with your bat to the front door. You unlocked the door with the key Jamie gave you and slowly walked in.

“Are you an idiot?! You fucking good for nothing I swear!” You heard his yelling, immediately you called the police in case Jamie couldn’t, you didn’t respond in case they’d talk you out from trying to save your friend. “Don’t you fucking touch me!” You heard Jamie yell. “You’re my fiancé I can touch you however I want.” He growled. “I said no!” She yelled once more. You closed your eyes and prayed to whatever God out there to help you out. Your prayer was interrupted by glass breaking and another scream. You immediately turned to the kitchen where the noise was coming from and saw the 6”2 man hovering over Jamie who was on the floor sitting against the wall, you almost fainted at the blood and dark liquid you assumed was wine, and your anger rose when you saw her hand over her eye. She was obviously in pain. In his hand was the broken wine bottle. He lifted his arm once more but you blacked out and swung the bat. You hit his side and he growled in pain. He turned to see you and his eyes darkened. “You fucking bitch, this is all your fault. If you haven’t became friends with her worthless ass then maybe she wouldn’t have tried to leave me.” He seethed. He made his way to you and before you can defend yourself with another swing the police had barged in and listened to everything.

Jamie was taken to the hospital and was released in the early morning. Tobio helped you moved her stuff out because she suffered a broken wrist and a fractured leg. Your tiny studio apartment couldn’t hold all her things so she had to pay for a storage unit. You couldn’t help but laugh at the look on her face when she saw how empty your home truly was. You slept on the floor in a futon while your kids slept in cribs. You couldn’t afford dressers so you kept their clothes folded neatly on bookshelves. There were baby toys everywhere but no TV. No couch, no alcohol, no nothing.

“Welcome to my home.” You did your little jazz hands, she chuckled and smiled. “Thank you for everything.” “No problem, I know it isn’t much but just for a bit until the trial is over okay?” You said and she nodded. You placed the kids in their cribs and fixed the futon you were sleeping on. “You can sleep here.” You patted, she nodded and made her way over with her crutches. “Do you have another futon?” She asked. “Yeah I’ll pull it out right now.” You said and she nodded. You helped her down and tucked her in. “You’re the only friend who decided to help me.” She spoke suddenly, catching you off guard. “All of my other friends could care less whether I died or not, they’d probably fight over who can keep my clothes.” She said with a dry chuckle. “I appreciate you yn, thank you.” She said and closed her eyes.

You looked at your best friend completely passed out and reminisced I’ve show much you’ve both grown. From enemies to besties.

“Don’t forget they have a limit of 5000 yen.” You warned Tobio and he rolled his eyes. “Yeah yeah, whatever lemme spoil my niece and nephew in peace.” He argued and you sighed. “Just don’t buy them slime, please.” You practically begged. “That was the first thing they asked when I arrived.” He said as he buckled them in their seats.

Once in a while Tobio loved taking them out to give you a break and you appreciated that so much. When Tobio entered your home to grab a quick water, Rin’s car was pulling up and you were slightly nervous as to what could happen. You haven’t exactly told Tobio you were dating Rin again, and Tobio totally flipped when he found out Rin was moving in.

You had told Rin that Tobio wanted to take the kids out for the day and he was a little hesitant, not because he didn’t trust Rin but he wondered if they liked Tobio more than him. He understands he was like a father figure to them and he knows that he’s not on Tobio’s good side. He’s also jealous because he hasn’t taken them out for a father and child day as well. He would love to go to the mall with them and spend money on useless shit. You’d be angry but he’s sure he can handle it.

Rin parked his car and took out his gym bag, he also took out a bag of some thick ass pads, aloe Vera gel and a bottle of something called witch hazel and he made sure it was the alcohol free kind per your request over text. At least you were kind enough to send him pictures so he’s not wandering around the store like a fool.

He was confused about the pads because you use a thinner pad when you’re not using tampons and wondered if your vagina got bigger because you gave birth. But he thought that you feel the same as always so he’d rather ask then overthink things.

“Welcome back Rin.” You smiled as from across Tobio’s car, “Thanks.” He said simply and leaned in to give Akira a kiss on the head, he went around to do the same to Rini and then he pulled you close for a small kiss. “Well what do we have here? I know y’all are together but this was the first time I’ve seen y’all kiss.” Jamie said as she stepped out. You both flinched thinking it was Tobio and Jamie laughed, “Don’t worry he’s in the bathroom. But when are you planning on telling him? You can’t hide your relationship forever.” She rested her hand on her hip.

“I don’t know to be honest.” You sighed and leaned against Tobio’s car. “Maybe he should warm up to me first before we tell him?” Rin asked, “If it isn’t Suna Rintarou.” Tobio walked out of the house. Rin stood straight and gave a slight bow, “Thank you for being there for yn and the twins when I was gone. It’s nice to finally meet you.” He tried to be as respectful as possible.

Tobio crossed his arms over his chest with raised brows, “I can’t say the same for you.” He spat and you felt a pang in your chest. Tobio looked so angry. “Tobio, he’s doing his best. He’s been nothing but respectful and helpful around the house and with the kids.” You explained, “Look, I get that you’re hopeful and forgiving but he ruined your life—“

“He gave me the twins—how is that ruining my life?” You defended. Tobio rolled his eyes, “Whatever, I don’t wanna fight.” He mumbled and you nodded. You stepped away from the car so he can finally take the kids and as he passed by Rin, he purposely bumped his shoulder. You were about to say something but Rin just shook his head and brushed him off. “Bye Tobio, I’ll see you after.” You said but he just mumbled a bye and glared at Rin.

He soon left and Jamie broke the silence, “Yeah so he definitely hates Rin.”

“No shit Sherlock.” Rin sighed and rubbed his temples. “He’ll probably strangle me and give me an earful if I tell him now. We just gotta keep it a secret a little while longer.” You said and they nodded in understanding.

Rin went to shower as you began cooking and Jamie went on a livestream for a bit. She was playing music from your TV which wasn’t pg so you let I slide since the kids weren’t here. “Hey yn do you remember any cheer drills from highschool?” Jamie asked as you turned off the stove to let the food cool for a bit, “Um...not really but didn’t you guys used to do spins and stuff? I saw it a lot during the volleyball games.” You answered, “Yeah you’re not helping but thank you.” She smiled as she put her phone in front of a water bottle. You shook your head and tried not to laugh at he sarcasm.

She took a few steps back to try to recreate an old cheer, obviously she couldn’t jump or do high kicks but it was funny to see her try and you made sure to keep an eye on her in case she overworked herself. You turned back to your task for a split second when the rice cooker beeped. Jamie squatted—well she tried and suddenly she felt a splash down her legs. She gasped as she saw her mustard yellow skirt now wet. “YN—“ she slightly raised her voice in a small panic. “Yes?” You immediately asked and walked to check on her, “My water broke.”

“Lies.”

“This doesn’t smell like pee.”

You were immediately at her side in order to help get her ready for a trip to the hospital. “Are you feeling any contractions?” You asked and she shook her head, “I feel fine.” She replied. “Turn off the livestream.” She said and you quickly turned off her phone. “Okay we’ll call the midwives and see what we need to do for you.” You said and she nodded. You immediately called the midwives and they asked what happened until Jamie winced and groaned. “Jamie, what’s wrong? Do you feel it now?” You asked and she nodded. “Yeah if we don’t leave now I’m having the baby in your house.” She sighed.

The midwives agreed to meet at the hospital with you and you tried your best to guide Jamie to the car. “Rin!” You yelled, he immediately stumbled out of the bathroom wearing some basketball shorts and a t shirt, his usual stay at home wear. “Take her to the car and I’ll go get her bag, her water broke.” You instructed quickly. He was quick to carry her, causing Jamie to smack him when he made a face that he can feel her ‘pee’ after he just showered.

He carefully placed her in the passenger seat of his car since it was smaller and he saw you rush out of the door. “Hnnnnnnn. Fuck my pelvis—“ she groaned and began taking deep breathes.

“Please don’t give birth in my car.”

“Shut the fuck up, Rintarou.”

You kicked Rin to the backseat with Jamie’s bag much to his dismay and you reversed and made your way to the hospital which was about a good twenty minutes away. He called Hana who happened to be on her way back already because she finished business early.

Halfway through the drive Jamie asked to hold your hand for comfort. You’ve done it before, when she faced her ex in trial, when she started a new makeup line or product, before she had an event, before her wedding with Hana. You were always there. “I’m scared.” She mumbled as she looked out the window, “It’s okay to be scared, I was scared when I was in labor.” You replied. “Who was with you?” She asked, “Tobio, and my aunt. Miwa and Hana came when I returned home.” You answered as you stopped at the red light. “Not even your mom?” Her voice cracked, “Nope, not even her. I did call to let her know I was due soon but she just called me names so I hung up.”

Rin looked down at his hands and he rubbed the sweat from his palms on his shorts. It hurt listening to this, if only he didn’t change his number, if only he didn’t lie to you, if only he never laid eyes on you.

If only he never met you.

Tobio was right.

How can you say he didn’t ruin your life when these past five years have been nothing but hell. When you were out of the house and Rin was home with Jamie and the kids he would ask Jamie what happened the last five years because he knew she wouldn’t sugarcoat anything.

He felt a jab in his chest when he heard about all the negative things, and no matter how many positive things Jamie said happened. It was never good enough for him to forget all the shit he put you through.

And that’s why he’s so clingy now, that’s why he’s happier and eager to help and please you in whatever way he can to make up for all this lost time where he should have been by your side. He’ll prove to Tobio and anyone else that he’s good enough for you, that he can be trusted and that he truly loves you.

Funfacts!

I’m sorry I forgot to do this in the last chapter please forgive me 🧎

The kids are happy that their parents are together and they started drawing their family portraits with you two holding hands

Rini accidentally swallowed his tooth in his sleep and cried that the tooth fairy would give him money but Rin made sure to sneak money under his pillow the next night

Jamie’s ex is still in prison and is pissed she left him for a woman (but we stan Hana)

I know same sex marriage isn’t legal in Japan but once again this is a fanfic so I make the rules 🧍

Rin is actually scared of Tobio

But Rin is more scared of Hana

Rin wants to procreate with yn wearing his EJP jersey 🧎 daddy please

Tobio likes to spoil his niece and nephew a little too much. Yn always has to warn him or scold him. Tobio almost bought Rini a real sword because he liked it so much.

Rin is pretty jelly of Tobio’s relationship with his kids and wants to know his secrets

This is Jamie’s 3rd pregnancy, the first was with her ex but his little swimmers were too weak, and the second..y’all already know 😔 if not then reread chapter 1 when yn scolds Jamie for chasing after the kids

After the baby is a year old then Hana will try to get pregnant with the same donor that Jamie had

Idk if I told y’all already but Tobio is the donor 🧐

The thick pads and stuff that Suna got was for YN to make padcicles for Jamie.

Also I am very hungry

🏷: @therealwalmartjesus @differentballooncollection @aaesuki @atsunflower @dope-squish @prettysetterboiss @june-phantom @austriasmariazelle @xrnia @katsulia @aprettyfruit @shut-your-eyes-kiss-me-goodbye @tvbiio @sun-daddy-yoriichi @kamenoyaki @ppangiiroo @loeyprivvv @kmskj92 @lovinnoya @sarahvvictoria @tris-does-stuff @mokkeguts @sunaluvr6969 @bara-rose-would @sempiternal-amour @volleybloop @leykyuu @bokutoichigo @stfucanunot @iloveanime691 @atsumusdomain @ohrintarou @shoutosimp @mqrinqcele @bokutosdivineass @anngelllla @toworuu @hidden-otaku-stuff @seijohiselite @caxsthetic @aquariarose @hhwanggu @bakuhoetoedoroki @yoozuku @osamus-onigiri @akaashi-todorki @donica95 @kakaokenma @airheadpillar

[qui-02]

When you sit in another boy’s lap. Pt2

Part 1 Part 3

Your guy friend name is Akira, (don’t judge me I was watching devilman crybaby while writing this.)

Warnings: Tendou’s part is spicy ;)

Acts super calm

He knows that you have you and Akira known each other since you were booth 3.

Still jealous because his sugar is only allowed to sit on SUGAWARA’S lap

You just got up from Akiras lap since you saw the love of your life,Sugawara Koushi. He noticed that you where walking towards him so he opened his arms to welcome you. You loved when he hugged you. It made you feel safe and loved, but something was wrong today. He wasn’t smiling like usual today, you gave him a sweet kiss on the cheek before asking him “Suga is something wrong? Ypu aren’t smiling like usual today.” He let a small sight and began, “Sweetheart I know that you and Akira have been childhood best friends and I am super ok with that. But I still can’t help the fact that it made me feel jealous.” He looked to see your face and he could clearly see that you were embarrassed, “ I am so sorry Suga.That was a little to much, I won’t do it again.” After you reached out to him and gave him an apology hug and kiss.

Would 100% Text you.

Would probably want to kill Akira, kills Akira with his killer eyesight.

Very very jealous.

You were chatting with your best bud Akira when you suddenly got a text message from your RinRin, that is how you liked to call Suna. It always made him blush when you called him that.

Suna: Excuse me.

Suna: Who the F*ck does Akira think he is? Is he your new boyfriend?

Y/N: Sorry RinRin, I already got up.

Suna: Good I am coming to pick you up.

Y/N: Please babe don’t give him that look.

Suna: What look?

Y/N: That “I am going to kill you look”

Ok, wants to kill Akira

Will punish you :)

It was lunch time and you just finished your class with your childhood best friend Akira. You usually had lunch with Tendou which was your boyfriend for 4 months now. You saw him approaching you and you ran to his long and warm arms. You wanted to say hello but he just randomly said “ I think I am going to kill someone princess ” You got concerned and asked “huh, what happened babe? He took his arms off from your waist and looked at you straight into your eye “ my beautiful girlfriend was sitting in a random boy’s lap.” You soon realized what was wrong and hugged him again hoping that a hug would make him feel a bit better. “ Satori baby, you know that Akira is just a close friend of mine” he let a big sight, that is when you knew that you where in trouble. He bent down so he could whisper into your ear, you could feel his hot breath tickling your ear. “I don’t care. Let’s skip lunch and go into the locker room, you need to be punished for your actions Y/N.” He want back to his normal posture before giving you a small smirk. Somehow that little whisper made you a pool in your underwear.

[hunnybby]

Chances

Pairing: Kunimi Akira x fem reader

genre: general/fluff

Confessing is harder than it seems. You try a few different ways, but it never seems right.

wc: 2.6k

a/n: Happy Holidays to everyone and and especially to @mimi-cee-hq! Surprise! I’m your Secret Santa for the @haikyuucreations SS event! :) I had a GREAT time being your anon, and I was super excited to write for you! May you have a blessed day, and may it be merry and bright! 

-

Verbal

"Kunimi!"

The boy halts mid-step, already half way to the gym with his gym bag slung over his shoulder. He turns around, face expressionless (as usual) with no hint of annoyance (surprisingly). Adjusting his gym bag, he makes eye contact with you. "What's up, Y/N?"

"There's something I need to tell you," you say, forcing your voice to level out instead of shake. Your hands are stuffed inside of your jacket pocket and balled into fists to keep yourself steady. "It's important."

Kunimi lets his body turn towards you, facing you fully with his head tilted to the side and a hint curiosity in his usually disinterested eyes. "Shoot," he urges, bringing a hand up to signal you to continue.

You heave out a breath. "Okay," you start, opening and closing your fists still in your pocket as a ways to get ready, "I really like-"

"Oi, Kunimi! You coming or what?" You recognize Kindaichi's voice from afar, and immediately freeze up. Wasn't everyone supposed to be already in the gym? Shouldn't Kunimi be the only straggler today because you asked your friend to stall him from practice?

The call from his fellow team mate has him slightly turning his head to where the gym is located. But he turns back to face you. "Hm?"

You hear light jogging now. No doubt Kindaichi on his way to retrieve Kunimi for warm ups. How dedicated, you think in passing.

You start to feel your heart race. If you don't say it now, you might never find the courage to say it again. But Kindaichi might also hear you. What if Kindaichi hears you, Kunimi reacts in a non-favorable way, and you can't show your face again? Would you need to change schools? Change your name? Perhaps live a new life somewhere else-

"Y/N?"

You snap out of your thoughts, looking from the ground to meet his eyes once more. Kindaichi is already directly behind him. You've spent too long thinking, and you curse to yourself. What now?

"I really like...," it feels like your brain is grasping for straws, or anything to say. An excuse? You look behind Kunimi to find Kindaichi also looking at you expectantly. And you decide you can't do it when there are spectators around. So you need to make a statement now.

"I really like... your... middle part," you finally say, gesturing to your own head so that he knows you were clearly referring to his hair.

Saying this outloud would be too difficult.

-

Interlude I

“... and then I tell him how much I like his middle part,” you whine, handing over a full water bottle to the current captain of Aoba Johsei.

It’s uncommon for you to confide in someone, or anyone really, for something so personal and embarrassing. It’s especially uncommon for that person to be Oikawa Tooru. But when it came to it, you needed to tell someone sometime before the truth explodes out of you.

Oikawa makes a face. “Ugh, that is embarrassing. Everyone knows Kunimi’s redeeming quality is his nonchalance, not his middle part,” he states. You think you see him over-exaggerate a shudder and shake your head in disagreement. You don’t think his middle part is bad!

You practically yank the water bottle from his hand once he’s done chugging. “That’s not the point,” you almost hiss, keeping your voice a low whisper.

He bends himself down to your level, using the wall to support his weight as he rests before the break is over. “Oh?” There’s a curious smile that graces his features. “So were you trying to call him over to tell him how madly in love you are with him?”

You purse your lips together, both in thought and annoyance. Why is it that he could read you like a book? You suck in your teeth slightly, getting ready to retort back when Oikawa begins to speak again.

“Well, now’s your chance,” Oikawa snickers, positioning himself upright as he pushes himself from the gym wall and saunters off coolly.

“No, please don’t go-,” you say to the captain’s retreating form, arms rising to clutch at air before hanging your head down in defeat. A free hand comes up to your forehead to slap yourself softly. Preparation. That's what you're doing right now.

“Here you go. Thanks,” you hear Kunimi say from behind you.

You turn around to see him extending out an empty water bottle to you. Your eyebrows wrinkle together slightly at this, and you think yourself that he could have left it on a chair or a bench so that you could pick it up later. This is the first time he’s done this.

You take the bottle from his hands, taking care to avoid any physical contact. “No problem,” you say, and you can’t help but fill the will-be-awkward silence with your unnecessary commentary. “It’s good to stay hydrated with water- you know our brains are like 70% of water,” no you aren’t going to fact check this later, “so make sure you drink enough water to keep your brain big!” you finish off with a nervous laugh, your free hand going to rub your elbow.

He gives you a curious look. “Sure,” he responds to you. “Good to know,” he finishes off, not laughing. But he smiles a bit at you before running off.

You inhale and exhale quickly, not realizing you were holding your breath while waiting for a reply.

You start to think that maybe you need to go a different route- what’s easier than talking to someone you like face to face?

-

Written

“It’s cold,” Kindaichi says, taking one hand out of his pocket as if to test the air. “Very cold.”

“So?” you question, stuffing your own hands further into your pocket and digging yourself deeper into the depths of your oversized scarf. “It’s always cold in December. In the morning. On a Saturday. When you guys practice. In December. Why do you all practice Saturdays again?”

He snickers first before responding. “You know who gets cold easily? Kunimi,” he nods his head in said-friend’s direction. “You should share that monster of a scarf with him. It’s big enough to shelter the whole team from the winter.”

“Ha-ha,” you say dryly, puffing out air and watching the cloud disperse in front of you.

Kindaichi doesn’t respond to you, his attention now focused ahead. He lightly jogs forward, leaving you slightly behind to shuffle your way towards the gates of the school.

It feels like the closer you get to your destination, the heavier your steps become- almost as if your whole body is rejecting the plan you so thoughtfully concocted in your head the night prior.

In your pockets you keep yourself from balling your fist. You can’t risk crinkling the small stationery you had carefully picked out- the contents of the pretty envelope holding one sheet of pretty paper with valuable information meant only for the eyes of one person in particular.

Kunimi.

3 easy steps for success.

Step 1: find Kunimi.

And you find him almost instantly! It only helps you further that he's in the same spot he always is right before the start of the school day- leaning on his favorite pillar outside in solitude. No one in sight. Perfect.

You just need to make your way to him. The heavy steps coming to haunt you once again. Left. Right. Left. Right. Stop.

Step 2: Strike up a conversation

"Good morning!" you say in a rush, immediately regretting your volume and tone of voice. It's not /that/ good a morning, and you have to clear your throat. Two pitches, too high! Also too much.

Kunimi looks up from his phone and sets it in his pocket. "Hey. Morning," he responds to you, waiting expectantly.

"It's cold, huh?"

He raises an eyebrow and the corner of his lip upturns into a smirk. "How cold is it?"

"It's sooo cold, that the water in my bottle is frozen! A mini-you could probably ice skate in it," you joke, taking his intentional set-up for it as a go-ahead.

"I'm terrible at ice skating. I'd much prefer sitting and watching."

"Oh, yeah! Me too," you lie- but it's not a total lie. You recall in the back of your head that you can ice-skate for at least 5 minutes without falling over and eating ice.

He smirks. "Liar. I've actually seen you in roller blades before- I don't think that's any different."

A little heh escapes your lips. "You caught me!" You want to comment that there is a difference, but that isn't something you want to get into right now. What you should be getting into is your pocket. And in your pocket is where your hand starts to shake.

Step 3: Hand over the letter

You feel around, gently bending the edges of your letter. "I have... something... for you," you struggle to say. Your index finger and thumb smooth over the envelope.

He looks at you with full attention, waiting for your next move.

As you find the will to take out your letter, your eyes move up to his middle part again. You think for a second that you really do like his middle part, and that he makes it work for him. How effortless. So effortless you almost feel annoyed about it. You spend so long on your own hair, he probably spends 20 seconds on his every morning.

"Is it something you can eat?" he asks you teasingly.

Another small, nervous laugh leaves you. If you can eat my feelings, then yes!

But now you feel something else in your pocket. A smaller rectangle. Wrapped in foil. Gum. You let out a quick, shaky breath. The thought of having gum in your pocket is now making you regret this plan. This gum is a sign that you shouldn't be doing it like this! (What an excuse!)

When your hand finally leaves your pocket, hand it to him.

You hand him the gum that was in your pocket, but the thought of handing him a love letter makes you gulp anyway.

Kunimi looks at his outstretched palm, staring at the covered piece of unchewed gum, and then closes his hand around it and places it in his gym bag. "Thanks," he says, a confused smile on his face paired with his signature tone of unconcern and collection. "I don't think I can have this right now, but definitely later."

"Oh, yeah," you say, feeling the awkwardness of yourself leave your body through your mouth. "Later. When your breath kinda stinks. Wouldn't wanna talk to someone and then have them say something like why do you smell like onions, Kunimi!" you word-vomit, voice imitating what would sound like your best Kindaichi expression yet.

-

Interlude II

"I gave him my last piece of gum!" You whine in the equipment closet. "My last piece!"

Kyotani, the victim who has unfortunately found himself in the gravity of your unrelaxed aura, only grunts in response. He drops the net that you had asked him to carry to its place of rest and dusts his hands off o his gym shorts.

"I ended up ripping the letter in pieces and drowning it in water to dissolve the evidence," you admit, recalling the moment right before morning practice where you ran to the nearest water fountain to soak your feelings.

As much as Kyotani scares you, you find it easy to talk to him under circumstances where you feel like summoning a black hole to swallow your entire self whole. Doesn't say much, but he listens. At least you think he does. He's never given much facial expression that indicates his interest in anything. You're so used to a scowl.

He doesn't move from his spot in the closet, so you take this as the time to continue. "What do I do now? The letter was fool-proof. Do I write it again and give it to him later? What if I chicken out again? Do I throw it in the trash, then? Eat it this time so no one ever finds it?"

You turn to look at Kyotani, and notice that he's staring hard at the net he so neatly placed. "Do whatever," he comments.

You think you feel your ears perk up. Do whatever? Do whatever.

You let out a tiny gasp, "Oh my stars, Kyotani," you start, walking towards the closet exit and then walking back towards him. "You're right."

Kyotani raises a brow, visibly confused.

"I have to do whatever," you emphasis. "As in whatever it takes."

He nods slowly, still lost.

You make your way back to the door, ignoring Kyotani and deep in thought. You need to think about your next move.

-

Actions

"Kunimi, hey!" you greet, marching head first towards him and his favorite pillar yet again. Perfect is the first word that comes to mind. Because the pillar is the perfect spot to do this. It's only the only spot you had in mind for this to work. Also- you aren't tall enough to reach any door frames anyway.

"Y/N, what's up?" he responds, small smile appearing to brighten up your morning. The word perfect comes up again. And it snaps you back to your plan.

"Nothing much," you say, releasing one of your backpack straps from your shoulders to sling it over your front. "Got something for ya, though." Your fingers reach to unzip your bag. "But you need to close your eyes."

"It's not Christmas yet," he argues, but shrugs and closes his eyes anyway.

"Think of it as an early gift then?" you suggest playfully, the sound of tape ripping from its roll and paper slapping on cement pillar. "It's home made," you add, voice slightly shaking towards the end as your confidence falls from you. But you've already taped what you needed to on the pillar. You can't just rip it up now.

You position yourself next to him, leaning on the pillar now. "Okay- open your eyes and look up!" you say nervously, the speed of your words rushing towards the end.

But you didn't rush it fast enough. He has heard your request, and looks up. You study his face closely. He looks confused at first, squinting his eyes to view the picture better, but they widen out when he realizes that you've drawn a picture of mistletoe on a blank sheet of printer paper. With the little red berries and all. Very festive. "Very creative," he blinks a few more times, before looking back down to you and smirking. "Looks like holly more than mistletoe."

Your brows knit together and your lips purse in fake annoyance. "Aren't they the same thing?"

He shrugs at you again, taking his hands out of his pockets and begins dusting at your shoulders. "I don't think so," he replies, still looking smug. "So?"

You feel yourself rocking back and forth, spending extra time on your tiptoes. "So..."

His reaction gives you a boost of confidence, and you feel yourself getting warm and giddy. "Ready for the next part of your surprise?"

-

Interlude III

"She finally did it, huh?" Kindaichi asks, tossing a few volleyballs into the basket after practice.

From behind him, Kunimi comes up with a mop. There's an odd skip in his step, and he looks less tired than usual- almost lively. "I guess so," he tries to say as coolly as possible. He keeps his eyes focused on mopping, afraid that if he makes eye contact with his teammate he'll read him like a book.

Kindaichi knows this, and respectfully keeps his eyes on his own task. But that doesn't mean he'll end the conversation there. "So what's the next move?"

He sags a bit, thinking. He remembers the last confession he received in middle school. How awkward and embarrassing it was to stand on the roof of the school with someone who he only knew in passing.

He remembers your confession. How awkward it was but how genuinely nice it made him feel. So he says, "I surprise her next time. That's the move."

[doomednarrative]

Devilman Lady Review:

Alright. I suffered through all 17 volumes of Devilman Lady and I intend to give it a proper review the same way I did the original manga. I can’t tell if the fact that I actually went and read the entire thing is a cry for help or if I’m just this insane, but either way, I certainly have Things To Say about it. I’m going to put this review under a read more however because of how much triggering content comes up in this manga that I intend to discuss as part of my review.

(Trigger warnings ahead for: talk about sexual assault/violence, incest and homophobia.)

With that out of the way, let’s get into my thoughts:

Right off the bat, I can say 100% without a shadow of a doubt that I will never read this manga again. Whereas I will absolutely read the original Devilman many times in the future no doubt, this is a manga I do not ever want to touch again, and for very good reason.

Now for the record, folks warned me going in that DML was bad right off the bat, and I did believe them on that. But I severely underestimated just How bad it really was. In all, I was met with:

The first seven volumes, and parts of the other volumes, being filled back to back to fucking back with rape scenes and sexual assault writing that's very clearly poorly hidden fetish stuff from Nagai’s en. (It gets worse because of how often this happens to underage characters as well.)

Jun having her agency and choice in the matter of being Devilman Lady completely taken from her, instead being forced upon her in the worst and most traumatic way possible

Lesbians, but portrayed in one of the most offensive ways I’ve ever seen. I’m not even a lesbian and I felt massively uncomfortable about it

SURPRISE INCEST THAT TURNS INTO SELFCEST 16 VOLUMES IN, AND THIS IS NOT SEEN AS A BAD THING. THE INCEST IS JUST FINE IN THE NARRITIVE AND BOTH JUN AND RAN ARE FINE WITH IT

This stuff isn't even the half of what’s wrong with the story, but it’s the biggest offenders by far. Devilman Lady reads the whole way thru, save for most of Akira’s time in the spotlight, as an excuse to draw some of the worst fetish material poorly disguised as a monster of the week turned into long con demon war story. It hits a lot of very similar plot beats to the original manga but in much worse ways, adding in unnecessarily shitty details or just downright triggering content of the worst degree. The parts of the story that aren’t gross are just fucking boring most of the time, and I think that makes it even worse because you feel like youre suffering through this story for absolutely no reason for like half of it until Akira shows back up.

I think, besides all the obviously offensive factors I’ve listed already, what makes me frusterated about the manga is that there are actual moments in it where I thought “Gee, there is actual potential here that I could see being made into a well thought out and engaging story, if only the fucking author actually cared about those things at all instead of just writing gross shock horror and rape scenes for fun.” Like there’s a comment at one point in the very beginning of the story talking about how the devil beast phenomenon disproportionately affects the lower class and poor/homeless folks, and in a better timeline, I could absolutely see the narrative of DML playing out to be a social commentary on why something like that is the case, and giving an actual sensitive look at the topic. Jun would still work great as the protaganist in that kind of story too, if the good traits about her writing were put into full focus, she would be perfect for that kind of story while still keeping some of the same parameters that DML already sets for her.

DML is also so fucking frusterating because besides the bits where Akira takes front stage and talks about his own story with Ryo/Satan, it just falls fucking flat. Whenever it brings up similar issues that Nagai wrote about in the original manga, they leave absolutely no deeper impact on the reader. Whereas the original is such a poignant story about the horrors of war and human evil and things like that, DML holds absolutely no water and has no hard hitting emotional impact. They discuss some similar things like political strife and biological warfare and nuclear weaponry and social disruption, but in the end it amounts to nothing. The end of the story isnt even about those things. It ends with Akira and Ryo making up and deciding to fight this new demon war on the same side against God, and while I do love that don’t get me wrong, it means the rest of the story just gets lost in the end. There’s nothing truly memorable about it like there is with the original. (At least in a good way, that is.)

AND SPEAKING OF RYO AND AKIRA...

We got canon Ryokira but AT WHAT FUCKING COST-

I could have handled it if it was just the selfcest. Selfcest is still weird, but I could have handled it if Ran and Jun were Just like some cosmic soulmate kinda thing where they’re two halves of a whole. That would have been acceptable on my weirdness scale. But MAKING THEM BIOLOGICAL SISTERS AND THEN TURNING IT INTO SELFCEST WAS. CERTAINLY A FUCKING CHOICE, AND NOT ONE I ENJOYED.

Just...god there were so many hours spent reading this manga I will never get back, and the only parts of it that I genuinely enjoyed were when Akira was in the main focus with his emotional musings and internal conflicts. And that’s not even Jun or Ran’s fault, because I went into this wanting to like them more than I ended up doing. They do have potential, but Nagai refuses to let them live up to it, and in the end well. We see where that went. As parts of Ryo/Satan they have some potential and there are things I could discuss there, but as their own characters? They don’t live up to what they could be, and neither does the rest of the story, and it just leaves a bad taste in my mouth in the end.

All in all, Devilman Lady was both horribly gross and weird at its worst, and just plain disappointing at it’s best, and I do not ever plan to read it again.

[books-and-dragons]

Maruki’s Rank 6 gave me some Thoughts™

so, i did promise myself i wouldn’t answer asks/do these type of posts until i finished royal, but honestly i couldn’t help myself

amma quick start with the disclaimer that i vaguely am aware maruki ain’t a bro (and no there will not be elaboration. mainly bc i’m in october of royal so i can’t, my spoilers have been thankfully minimal yet irritatingly still present) 

also i’ll probs make a comprehensive post about the maruki’s confidant once i finish royal, but for now this is ‘thoughts i’ve had midway in’, specific to rank 6, with a splash of rank 7

i’ve been getting some red flags from his language, specifically his rank 6 stuff. (i’m at rank 9 atm, for context). this is more me spewing some thoughts, because playing through it pissed me of so much i had to rant SOMEWHERE goddamn it

but yeah, don’t take this too seriously or expect coherency and logic, it’s mainly a vent-y catharsis for me, but i figured why not throw it into the ring

i’m going to start by quickly outlining that i’ll only be discussing red flags in his language here, there’s a few psychological perspectives he seems to have that i disagree with, but that’s not relevant

it’s important i explain first that the language used by psychologists is trained from first year of studying (at least, at research-based univerisities at undergrad, then all unis at postgrad). the lexicon and specific semantic structuring is important because it sets a precedent and, when incorrect, can have negative ramifications- i’ll touch on this briefly

as i said, rank 6 was my Big Gripe, so we’ll start there

okay, this is an admittedly smaller issue, but i couldn’t not bring it up, since it reflects a greater issue at play

privacy. client respect. the right to boundaries. environmental consideration.

we don’t know the extent of akira and maruki’s interactions, we don’t know what is discussed in the therapy- but we can imply it isn’t much. similarly, i think it’s safe to assume that they have never discussed things such as alternate locations for sessions, or their safe space (this accounts both for akira letting people into his safe space, what he considers a safe space, and if leblanc is safe for him. that last one could be an interesting discussion for another time)

maruki has violated his client’s right to any of these by coming into leblanc.

and no, we can’t just say, ‘oh but they’re friends/acquaintences so it’s okay!!!’ because this introduces a signficantly worse issue

therapists are not your friend.

they aren’t ever supposed to be, because this crosses too many boundaries, and they need to be able to remain objective and allow their client this privacy

we didn’t even have rank 1 when maruki violated this. 

i won’t get too into that right now, but it’s important to consider in the grander scheme of things.

this word. save.

maruki brings it up a lot in rank 6 especially, when he wasn’t directly using it he strongly alluded to that overarching theme, and it immediately rubbed me up the wrong way, mainly for two reasons

the first, is that psychology doesn’t save people. it can’t. not even in a therapy context.

psychology, therapy, it helps. it can provide tools to manage your symptoms, ways to reason through negative/distorted cognition, a healthy outlet for discussion and getting proper support. but it doesn’t save people, it can’t save people

and you know what, even if it could, what is there to be saved from?

i don’t mean this in a ‘hey it’s not so bad’ way, i mean this in context of the semantics of ‘save’- which, for me, is the big part of why maruki’s language is a red flag

‘save’ implies there’s a victim here, that there’s something to be fixed

it’s demeaning, de-humanizing to an extent, and minimises someone’s suffering and mental state.

by maruki using it, there’s an implication that he sees his clients as helpless, hopeless, and in need of support (or you could say, in need of him- a therapist). i don’t refute that maruki seems like a good therapist, but when he has these moments where he exposes his internal perspective, you have to doubt his capacity to allow his clients their independence, to respect their autonomy and right to make their own decisions

it’s a small jump from victimising your clients to believing them to be unaware of what they really want/need

and this is what my whole issue with maruki using ‘save’ boils down to. it suggests that he may have a problem with letting go of his clients or their problems, maybe to the point of invasion of privacy or breaking therapist-client boundaries. i’ve not seen any of this yet, so it’s not an accusation, but it’s certainly something i could prodict if this perspective progresses/is reinforced. 

this perspective was clearly developed due to the incident concerning his fiancee, but there’s problems even within this. and a reason doesn’t excuse a perspective/behaviour, just explains it

i’m gonna finish on this final point.

to be a psychologist, is to admit you have limitations. to admit you can only do so much, and that your clients can only do so much. sometimes they will try their best, sometimes they won’t, and that you should encourage them- but never take their burdens.

as much as psychologists (of any practice, therapy especially) are pushed to be ‘empathetic’ and ‘compassionate’ they’re also told to be ‘clinical’ and ‘objective’

maintain distance between a psychologist and their patients/clients. admit one’s own limitations accept that there will always be suffering

how maruki has the outlook he appears to have, and is a therapist, baffles me. it’s not healthy for him, and may very well have an impact on his clients if it bleeds too much into his external behaviour

all in all, this isn’t a healthy or safe outlook to have. the therapist in question places unnecessary pressure on themselves that creates unnecessary (and dangerous, for several reasons) emotional/behavioural consequences which, as i briefly mentioned, may then affect their clients.

i don’t know a whole ton about maruki, but his rank 6 especially sent off some alarms let me just say that much

[yuzusorbet]

Continuing Kikuchi-san's book 'Strongly, beautifully,....'

If you have not read the earlier parts, please read them first.  See my previous posts in tumblr, OR the master post on FB.  

Chapter 2, parts 3 and 4 and 5: the relaxed athlete and the anxious trainer at Sochi  (t/n. this is my own summarised title of the 3 parts) (For these parts, I summarised or left out some sentences that are not so important to the main storyline.)

At Sochi Olympics, Yuzuru was in the team event and the singles event. 

That child had just turned 19, there was no pressure, and he did not know fear.  My job was to instruct and assist him for the warm-up.  And also, icing and body care after the performance.

Just like how choreography and costumes were clearly separated and taken care of by different people, taking care of the skater's body was the trainer's job.  Coach Brian did not give me any concrete instructions and he did not say anything about Yuzuru's warm-up.  I also did not interfere with figure skating techniques.  Anyway, I could not give any advice for that.  It was only my 4th time watching it at the venue.  And only my 2nd time at an overseas competition.

Even so, I could feel the enormity of the Olympics.  I felt the pressure of this huge stage.  I saw it in the faces of the athletes.  However, Yuzuru did not seem to feel much pressure.  He looked quite relaxed.

-------------------

The Sochi Olympics that Yuzuru faced in a relaxed manner, for me it was a series of big failures.

Firstly, when I made the warm-up plan for Sochi, I used Patrick Chan's methods as reference, but it was totally not suitable for Yuzuru.  Before official practice, he tried the warm-up programme that I had planned, and he became short of breath.  The reason is simple: there was too big a difference in stamina between Patrick Chan and Yuzuru at that time.  I realised that the warm-up which was effective for Patrick who was full of stamina, could not be used at all by Yuzuru.

Right up to the team event competition, I was discussing with Yuzuru and hurriedly making a new warm-up plan;  it was extremely poor support.

Speaking of poor support, the sports tape that is like the tool of my trade, became insufficient;  this is such a big mistake that if I were to be disqualified as a trainer because of this, I have nothing to say.  Normally, Yuzuru practised once a day.  But at Sochi, he skated at the rink twice a day.  Each time he wore his skate boots, the taping would be done again.  With more practice sessions, the tape I brought from Japan was  quickly used up.

To buy the tape, I ran around the streets of Sochi.  I was looking for medical shops or sports shops but the signs were all in Russian and could not be quickly understood.  I went into shops that looked like they would sell tape but I could not convey "please give me sports tape".   I used English and gestures, and somehow managed to buy some tape, but still the amount was not enough.

That kind of farce probably reached the ears of the Japan Skate Federation people.  "We will get the tape, so (you can focus on) supporting the athlete please."

I should have discussed with JSF staff right from the start.  I was too anxious and totally unable to see what was around me.

----------------

An important duty of the trainer is to get the skater's mental state ready. However, at Sochi, I kept disturbing Yuzuru's state of mind.  My biggest mistake was on the morning of the free skate.   For the short programme on the previous day, he had successfully made all the jumps and achieved a world record score of 101.45.  He was in first place.   Next, the free skate was coming up.

Official practice for the free skate was at 10am.  Considering the warm-up time needed, we would leave the Athletes' Village at 8am.  Before that, taping was needed, so I would have to go to Yuzuru's room at 7.30am.

However, Yuzuru's performance for the SP was too perfect and when I thought about the FS coming up, my heart started pounding.....  I could neither sit nor stand, and in the end, I left my room.  I reached Yuzuru's room 40 minutes ahead of time.

"Oh~, sensei, what's the matter?  You're very early," he said.

"I want to do a good job (with the taping) so I came over earlier," I made an excuse like that.  Frankly speaking, my usual self was already lost.

After the SP, there was a press conference which ended late.  By the time Yuzuru was back in his room, it was middle of the night, past 1am.  I should have let him rest a bit more, but I said, "Alright, let's do the taping."

"Eh? Now??"

My self of that moment paid no attention.  "What to do, what to do," I was panicking by myself and becoming flustered.

Yuzuru was trying his best to maintain his normal state of mind, so that he would not be swallowed up by the Olympic demon, that is, the atmosphere that prevents one from showing his usual abilities.  His trainer who was supposed to be his ally, was actively being an obstacle to his efforts.  I do not think that my actions gave him any good influence at all.  In any case, my self at Sochi Olympics had lost all common sense.

------------- Translated by me from Japanese book by Akira Kikuchi-san: https://www.amazon.co.jp

(next: last parts of chapter 2, coming soon)